
On today's Extra, Hunting, News We Failed to Mention, & Alli Breen
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Bob
This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. You chose to hit play on this podcast today. Smart Choice. Progressive loves to help people make smart choices. That's why they offer a tool called Auto Quote Explorer that allows you to compare your Progressive car insurance quote with rates from other companies. So you save time on the research and can enjoy savings when you choose the best rate for you. Give it a try after this episode@progressive.com Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. Not available in all states or situations. Prices vary based on how you buy.
Tom
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Bob
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Tom
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Christopher
Welcome back. It's another Bob and Tom extra. This is Christopher. Not only is the Bob and Tom show live every weekday morning, but every afternoon we'll give you a little extra in case you missed anything on today's big show. Hunting news, we failed to mention Ali Breen. It's all coming up in just a second. This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you ever think about switching insurance companies to see if you could save some cash? Progressive makes it easy. Just drop in some details about yourself.
Jeff
And see if you're eligible to save money.
Christopher
When you bundle your home in auto policies, the process only takes minutes and it could mean hundreds more in your pocket. Visit progressive.com after this episode to see if you could save Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates.
Jeff
Potential savings will vary.
Christopher
Not available in all states. Have the 900 numbers here.
Bob
Oh yeah.
Christopher
Oh yes. The porno lines. The talking dirty to people lines. I think you can probably get them here. Yeah, see, I don't understand. Have you ever called one just as a lark? Never, Never. Can't say I have the ad, the one that I can't believe. People call, they say, make friends, make dates or just get crazy. Now how would that work? Hi, this is Bob. I want to make friends. Well, this is Sally. I want to make dates. This is Dirk. Where do you people live? Where do you people live? I have snakes coming out of my head. What's your address? It's $2 well spent. I think when Alexander Graham Bell invented the phone, he had any idea it was going to phone sex? I don't think so. I don't think so. But you know, I always ask. This is amazing to me. I always ask in the clubs. Does anybody remember what the first wor ever spoken on the phone were? I believe it was, watson, come here, there's a fire. Watson, come here, I need you. There is always somebody who, who says hello. They guess hello. Now how would that work? What do you invent the phone, plug it in. And it rang. Hello. Hello. There go the Japanese zooming right ahead of us. Of course, you know the first words ever spoken on the radio by Marconi, don't you? No. Hey, how you doing? Good morning. 8, 9, 29 minutes. Got a double shot of poini coming up in just a second.
Chick
And a.
Christopher
Verde album package to get away. Fifth caller. Let's take the first caller. Who is it? Alexander Graham Bell. That's right. He invented the phone. Second caller, who is it? Alexander Graham Bell. He has the first one. Gave us the second. All right. Yeah, we know it's a repeat, but things are always better the second time around. This is Bob and Tom Extra.
Chick
It's our annual Thanksgiving eve show.
Bob
We're gonna we having a dinner. Thanks.
Chick
We're gonna hunt and kill a turkey coming up here very, very soon. I think next hour it's gonna go out in the side yard here and.
Christopher
Got a letter here from Aaron. Put an arrow right through its head in Shelby, Ohio.
Bob
Hi, Aaron.
Christopher
He experienced what I did. He guess yes. We go pheasant hunting the week of Thanksgiving. You normally have a pile of buckshot beside your plate when you're done eating.
Chick
Sure you do.
Christopher
Sorry to ruin your day, Chick. Tom is right. I'm telling you, I almost broke a tooth biting down on a piece of buckshot.
Chick
Why don't you use a bullet that's, you know, not more efficient? Yes. Yeah, how about a single bullet?
Christopher
Really?
Chick
How about a high powered rifle from up on a hill? Speaking of November 22nd, about 150 yards.
Christopher
Wait a second, hang on a second. November 22nd.
Chick
Yeah, that's right.
Christopher
Oh, that's right. Today's the 60th anniversary of.
Bob
You want to try that?
Chick
Triangulate the fire is what you want to do. Though I can't think of anything more upsetting than, oh, hey, I saw a.
Christopher
Flash of light on hers. There we go, there we go.
Chick
It's my favorite tie you wear. It's the rubber duck tie.
Christopher
We've Been joined by the formerly sick Jeff Osu.
Jeff
I'm back, baby. Yeah.
Chick
Yeah, he is.
Christopher
What have we got here, Jeff?
Jeff
We give you a lot of the news each week, but we don't give you all the news. So I'm here to give you the news that we failed to mention.
Christopher
Now here's Jeff Askay with what you failed to mention. Nose.
Tom
Pew, pew, pew, pew, pew.
Jeff
As we've talked about for a couple weeks now, two female astronauts on a spacewalk lost a toolkit that is visible in the sky via binoculars. Well, you failed to mention. According to my binoculars, the two female coeds in the condo behind my house look to have lost their tops the other night.
Christopher
The naked eye, you see.
Jeff
No, I had binoculars. A bride threw her husband a surprise wedding reception at the local Waffle House. What? You failed to mention. His hash browns weren't the only thing smothered and covered that night. 17th century Italians used marijuana. We learned that. Well, you failed to mention. And that's why the 17th century is known as the Stone Age.
Chick
I didn't know that Stone Age.
Jeff
I just made it up. Facts. Some dude somewhere set a new world record for the most chopsticks in one's beard. Well, you failed to mention. I'm still holding down the record for the most crumbs.
Chick
Yeah, you got stuff in there you're.
Christopher
Not even aware of.
Jeff
Oh, my gosh. Oh, there's a goldfish two years ago.
Christopher
Chop suey in there.
Jeff
There's a new pap smear beer. Which is exactly what you think it is. What you failed to mention. And just like a real pap smear, no one is looking forward to it.
Bob
No.
Chick
Boy, you'd have to love her a lot, wouldn't you?
Christopher
My gosh. Oh, man.
Chick
Boy. Okay.
Jeff
A man brought home a snake from a hike that he thought wasn't dangerous, but it was, and now he's in the hospital. What you failed to mention. Worst thing I ever brought home from a hike was poison ivy on my groin.
Christopher
Oh. What are you doing up there?
Chick
Right there on the.
Jeff
Peeing on a tree.
Bob
Do his own thing in his own time.
Christopher
That's right.
Jeff
And that's why I'm no longer allowed at parks. We learn that brandy Old Fashioned is the official drink of Wisconsin. What you failed to mention. Which explains their three letter state abbreviation at the time was owi. Owi?
Chick
Operating Wild and toxic.
Jeff
Yeah, they shortened it to wi. They thought it gave them State of Bad Name. Remember the good old days of three letter abbreviations?
Christopher
I'm sick.
Jeff
I've been doing.
Christopher
He's been sick.
Chick
He's been off. And I want. I want to point out that Ace has yet to write him any material. So what do you expect?
Jeff
Still waiting for.
Chick
It's a work in progress.
Jeff
Yeah, still waiting for your highlights magazine to show up. Scientists discovered an asteroid that has its own moon. What you failed to mention that is what's known in astrology as the dingleberry moon. Dingleberry moon. Speaking of astrology, Saturn's rings are going to disappear. What you failed to mention so will the ones around Uranus with a little soap and warm water. That's true.
Chick
That's absolutely true.
Jeff
Oh, we're getting close to the end. And like a Chilean miner, I've never been happier to see the light. The movie changed. Cinemark will now deliver concessions to your home. What you failed to mention. For an extra 20 bucks, they'll pre drill the bottom of the popcorn bucket for you.
Bob
Oh.
Jeff
Can you imagine trying that trick at home?
Chick
At home?
Jeff
Yeah, I tried it with a bag of microwave popcorn. You want to wait for that stuff to cool.
Bob
Yeah.
Christopher
You think the poison ivy was bad when you get hot butter? Dick, that is. That is rough. Yeah, hot butter when you add salt to it. Yikes.
Jeff
Yeah, watch the salt. And final. We learned people are dropping deuces while waiting in line at Disney. What you failed to mention. Worst part, they can't keep Pluto from rolling in it.
Chick
Pluto's a dog, Tom.
Christopher
You see? Okay, very good. Thank you, Pluto. Another way sexy time works is you write those love letters and.
Chick
Hello? Ally, Are you there to get him to stop talking? Is that a problem? Hello?
Christopher
Things that may be going wrong in your love life. We're here to help. We.
Bob
This day's going great.
Christopher
We're working. We're gonna hook up with Alec. By the way, yeah, we did have an issue with. Hello? The. The. The room. Getting the door locked.
Bob
There she is.
Christopher
There's Ali. Breeding.
Bob
Kidnapped. What's going on?
Tom
I'm in a hotel and I'm having tech problems. My mic wouldn't work, so I'm just leaning into my speakerphone and seeing if this.
Christopher
Okay. And where are you? In a hotel room in Atlanta.
Tom
I'm visiting the family, but I'm not staying with them until Thanksgiving night.
Chick
I don't blame them.
Christopher
That's a good idea. Anyway. Now, Allie, we can hear you. Okay. We can see you. You look great. Of course. And it's time now for sexy time. What have you got for us?
Tom
Dear Allie, my girlfriend brought her friend home for a threesome. She has hooked up with her on her own before. We talked about it and then we finally did it. And then I saw the girl again without her. She's coming unglued. She initiated us getting together and now wants to break up and says I cheated on her. But she meets her alone herself. So how is this different?
Bob
That's a good question. Yeah, that's a very good question.
Chick
Just go ahead and break up with her.
Bob
She and her girlfriend have a thing and then they brought him in and now he's seeing the girlfriend with a thing too, but she's upset about it.
Chick
And she's already seeing him on her. She seeing her on her own.
Bob
Right. So it's like. Yeah, it's like you just keep hooking up with the other girl and then break up with your current girlfriend and then make them.
Chick
Then make them break up and then you made the switch. Oh, there it is.
Christopher
Too many Christmas presents to buy. Pick one and get out. No kidding.
Bob
Is that how you look at it?
Christopher
I don't know.
Bob
It sounds like he was the third as opposed to being in the relationship. Does that sound right, Ally? Oh, like she was hooking up with the girl first?
Tom
Kind of. But it sounds like that wasn't a relationship. Like that was like a college. Like we did this for fun a couple times. Now let's bring you in to my relationship is what I think. But you can make the argument. Yeah. That they were first and he's the threesome guy.
Christopher
I don't think there are any hard and fast rules here.
Bob
I don't either.
Chick
I beg your pardon?
Bob
Garden.
Chick
You've got to have rules. Or what do you have? Chaos. That's right. And that's what we have.
Bob
What would your three way rules be?
Chick
Well, no kissing.
Bob
Okay.
Christopher
Fully clothed.
Chick
Always fully clothed. Except the bottoms. Bert Camphort must be playing okay on the stereo. And I think you have some.
Christopher
That's a tall order.
Chick
What's the next letter?
Christopher
Ally?
Jeff
Yeah.
Christopher
Okay.
Bob
Took care of that.
Christopher
Okay, next.
Tom
Dear Ally, I am married 10 years with two kids. My wife has gained at least 50 pounds since we got.
Christopher
What a hog.
Chick
Good God.
Jeff
Oh, my God.
Tom
I haven't had much sex with her since you. Since she put on these pounds. She caught me, pledged myself to porn and said that she considers that cheating. I married Naomi Campbell and now she looks more like Earl Campbell. Is this really.
Christopher
And jokes. If nothing else, I admire the. I admire the jokes.
Chick
But to Earl Campbell, one of the top five running backs in the NFL.
Bob
And Naomi Campbell, very pretty lady. Yes.
Christopher
So I'M sorry, there's two. There's two issues here that it would seem to me.
Chick
I can't think of any other better day than on Thanksgiving day to cut that string and let that balloon, that fat, fat balloon sail away.
Bob
They have two children.
Chick
Chick Wednesdays and every other weekend.
Christopher
So there's two. There's two issues here. Am I corre if I heard this? She's upset that he's viewing erotic cinema. Is that correct?
Tom
Exactly.
Bob
Yeah.
Christopher
And then he's upset that she doesn't want to have relations with him. Is that correct?
Tom
Or is he might not want to have relations with her? Which maybe is the. Maybe she's saying, why don't we just have sex and you don't have to watch porn? And he's like, she got too fat.
Christopher
Yeah. Yeah.
Chick
Well, this is kind of a black and white problem. It's pretty simple. What would you do if somebody got too fat for you?
Christopher
Bring salad home.
Chick
Good God.
Christopher
Oh, Pat's got it all solved. Hey, baby. I'm gonna have some pizza. Your salads, your salads in the fridge. Take off your pants.
Chick
I tell you what, Chunkles, here's what we're gonna do. Have a salad.
Bob
Now, this is a rough thing.
Christopher
There's some fine new weight loss pharmaceuticals going on the market. You may want to tantalize her with one of those.
Bob
Why don't you have sex with her so she can burn some calories? I don't know why you're not, like, trying to do things together. Watch the porn together. It's not cheating if you watch porn. Masturbate, though.
Chick
Sounds like the only thing they can do is watch tv.
Christopher
Yeah, you can't get close enough to.
Chick
Her to do anything else.
Christopher
Maybe get some. Yeah, get some donuts and porn and. Yeah, sit her down.
Chick
That's right.
Bob
We are horrible.
Chick
I think put some donuts around your shaft, see what happens. Okay.
Christopher
Gobble that right up. There's a contest.
Chick
Double that right up.
Christopher
Contest. How many standard sized donuts can you get around the thing?
Chick
There it is.
Tom
And then how many can she eat off it?
Christopher
Sadly, she can eat six, but he can only get two around. These donuts need some icing. Okay, I think we've. I think we've once again done no help. Ali Breen is our guest. You can reach her. A L L I B R E E N. Ally is a stand up comedian and any social media platform should link you to ally.
Chick
£50.
Christopher
Do we have a letter? Do we have another letter up here?
Tom
I hope to God I have been Dating a guy for the last two years, it hasn't been exclusive, but we do see each other regularly and we have great times. I just found out, however, that he's actively dating five other women. Wow. When I confronted him, he said, well, we both knew we weren't exclusive, but am I crazy? Doesn't dating five people at the same time put up a serious red flag? Plus, no more blood diseases. We use protection, but not during oral. Should I be worried? I feel like I need to wear.
Chick
Well, first of all, no one likes protection during the world. That's kind of silly.
Christopher
Yeah. There's not a big run on the dental dam or the rubber. And we're the dental damsel. They're aisle seven. They're on sale. They're in the. They're in the end camp.
Chick
He's seeing five other people, so he's.
Christopher
He.
Chick
He's organized.
Jeff
Yeah.
Chick
He knows what's going on.
Christopher
He can win a schedule.
Chick
I say you should be lucky to be one of the five.
Christopher
This guy's got CS CFO written all over him. Yes. He's got a big future.
Chick
Damn right.
Christopher
Day planner. Hey, you know, she knew this going in. I don't know what she's so surprised if this guy said we're not exclusive.
Chick
Yeah, she didn't get fat, did she?
Christopher
That's the last letter.
Chick
Oh, okay.
Bob
Depends on what she up, right? No, it just depends on what she wants. If it's working, I mess it up. I mean, but the whole time she's going to be thinking, well, what'd you do with Susie? What about with Queenie?
Chick
That's the last thing you can do is worry about who he's pounding when he's not with you. Okay, don't. Don't even think.
Christopher
Did he tell you that he'll be by for things giving at exactly 11:14, and he's got. He's got to leave at 12:10, and.
Chick
He'S got eight minutes of that. That's pure coitus. So that's all he's got.
Christopher
He's got you penciled in. Yes. And then he's going to leave his car running and back it in so he can get out quickly.
Chick
And you have to cancel. It's going to be another two weeks before you can fit in.
Christopher
I can't fit you in. We've solved that. We have time for one more letter.
Jeff
More success.
Tom
Dear Ally, my husband offered for us to host Thanksgiving, but so far he's done zero shopping, zero cooking, and zero cleaning. So basically volunteered me to do all Those things.
Christopher
Exactly.
Tom
He works full time and I work part time from home. And we have one child. He says that I'm the one who has time to do all this stuff, but I'm the one raising his kid and keeping up his home.
Chick
It's his kid, Tom.
Christopher
I'll tell you what. What, Ali? I was just reading an article about this. More and more Americans are going out for Thanksgiving. So they're going to. There's lots of restaurants that have Thanksgiving specials. I would recommend that Mr. Hardworking get out his Visa, MasterCard, American Express or Diners Club and take everybody out to dinner. So this hard working mother of a one year old who has better things to do than worry about all the stress that Thanksgiving brings, go out for dinner. That's what I would do.
Tom
I totally agree. Or at least order one of those. Can't you just order from.
Christopher
Yes. There's also tons of places that are doing to go.
Bob
But in her defense, and you know this, you're hosting. There's a lot more to it than just the cooking. It's the cleaning and the organizing and the decorating and the.
Christopher
I have dish pan hands. I've been washing dishes for three days.
Bob
It's a lot to host.
Christopher
Yeah, yeah. But no, that's. There's a simple solution. Especially if this guy doesn't want to.
Bob
Do any of the work, right?
Christopher
Yeah. Especially with a baby. Come on. That's what, That's. That's way too much to ask. She could always do the old Lysistrata bit and say no nookie, no washy. What is it? No, no washing, no washy, no nookie. Which is what? No Lysistrata. That wasn't the Greeks. Was it?
Chick
Confusion using that with some, some dry cleaner.
Christopher
Oh, okay. Lysistrata dry cleaners. Yeah. Accent. It's a Greek reference. Ladies and gentlemen, the benefits of a classical education. Ally, I hope you have a great time in Atlanta with the various members of your family. Who's going to be at the dinner table for Thanksgiving?
Tom
It's going to be my, you know, me, my sister, her family, the kids, and then my brother in law's parents and one of his brothers. So it's going to be a bunch of us.
Christopher
Yes. Did you bring your boyfriend?
Tom
No, he's with his family this year.
Christopher
Is he. Did he ask you to come with him?
Tom
Yeah, yeah. We decided to go separately this year. This is a first.
Chick
Well, that's probably best. Ease right up.
Christopher
Yeah.
Chick
No.
Christopher
Are you gonna put. What do you put on your plate? Like a tablespoon of cranberry sauce and half a carrot. You're gonna go big.
Tom
I won't eat all day. I'll have a huge. A nice big Thanksgiving Day. I don't love the turkey. Everything else is amazing, though. I'll go big on stuffing, mashed potatoes, that green bean capitol. Yeah.
Christopher
Okay. Okay. Well, good luck. Thank you. The lovely Ali Breen. Always a great pleasure, Ali. Good job.
Bob
Happy Thanksgiving, Allie.
Christopher
Bye.
Bob
See you all.
Christopher
Well worth it.
Bob
Yeah. That was good.
Christopher
We certainly helped a lot of people.
Chick
Yes, we did.
Christopher
That's it for another Bob and Tom show. Extra. Catch us on itunes, Google Play and stitcher for Bob and Tom. Extra. This is Christopher. Take care, everybody.
Tom
Bravo TV star Lala Kent holds nothing back.
Bob
Like I go into a full spiral.
Tom
Get to know the TV personality.
Bob
I talked about this with Teresa Giudice.
Tom
Remember when I pushed Andy Cohen? Yes.
Christopher
It was iconic.
Tom
Okay, the entrepreneur.
Bob
What are we manifesting in 2025? And the mom Sosa is a dream baby. Your kids are older. It's Bravo children. The celebrity children of celebrity.
Tom
Bravo Love. Give them Lala. Follow and listen on your favorite platform.
Podcast Summary: The BOB & TOM Show Free Podcast – Episode: B&T Extra: Hunting, NWFTM, & Alli Breen
Release Date: February 13, 2025
The B&B TOM Show delivers another entertaining episode of B&T Extra, where hosts Bob, Tom, and Christopher delve into an array of comedic topics, listener letters, and feature a special guest, Ali Breen. This episode seamlessly blends humor, relatable anecdotes, and insightful discussions, making it a must-listen for both regular listeners and newcomers.
The episode kicks off with the trio engaging in light-hearted banter about the evolution of phone usage, humorously speculating on Alexander Graham Bell’s unintended invention of phone sex lines. Bob muses, “Have you ever called one just as a lark?” setting a playful tone for the episode. The conversation quickly shifts to reminiscing about the first words ever spoken on the phone, blending nostalgia with comedic twists.
Christopher introduces a listener letter from Aaron in Shelby, Ohio, sharing his Thanksgiving tradition of pheasant hunting. Aaron recounts a humorous mishap:
Christopher ([04:14]): "He almost broke a tooth biting down on a piece of buckshot."
Chick and Tom chime in with suggestions to improve hunting efficiency, such as using a single bullet or a high-powered rifle, adding layers of humor to Aaron’s story.
Jeff returns to introduce the segment “News We Failed to Mention,” delivering a series of fabricated and humorous news briefs that parody real events. Highlights include:
Lost Tops on Astronauts:
Jeff ([05:30]): "According to my binoculars, the two female coeds in the condo behind my house look to have lost their tops the other night."
Chopsticks in a Beard Record:
Jeff ([06:26]): "I'm still holding down the record for the most crumbs."
Pap Smear Beer:
Jeff ([06:50]): "There's a new pap smear beer. Which is exactly what you think it is."
Cinemark’s Popcorn Bucket Innovation:
Jeff ([08:42]): "For an extra 20 bucks, they'll pre-drill the bottom of the popcorn bucket for you."
Jeff’s witty and absurd news items keep the segment lively and engaging, providing a comedic relief and showcasing the hosts' chemistry.
The hosts transition to the “Sexy Time” segment, where they address listener-submitted relationship dilemmas with their signature humor and advice.
A listener writes about the complications of engaging in a threesome, leading to misunderstandings and relationship strains. Tom presents the letter:
Tom ([10:48]): "Dear Allie, my girlfriend brought her friend home for a threesome... How is this different?"
The hosts dissect the situation, highlighting the pitfalls of unclear boundaries and communication, while Chick humorously suggests:
Chick ([14:34]): "What would you do if somebody got too fat for you?"
Their playful banter provides both comedic relief and genuine advice, emphasizing the importance of honesty and clarity in relationships.
Another listener shares frustrations about being solely responsible for hosting Thanksgiving, with no support from her husband. Tom shares the letter:
Tom ([16:02]): "Dear Ally, my husband offered for us to host Thanksgiving, but so far he's done zero shopping, zero cooking, and zero cleaning..."
The hosts offer practical solutions peppered with humor, such as suggesting ordering from restaurants or delegating tasks. Christopher humorously references classical literature:
Christopher ([19:53]): "Lysistrata dry cleaners."
Their empathetic yet humorous approach resonates with listeners facing similar holiday hosting challenges.
The episode features a special guest, Ali Breen, a stand-up comedian known for her sharp wit and relatable humor. Hosted by the trio, Ali joins the discussion to provide comedic insights and share her experiences.
During the interaction, Ali engages with the hosts about relationship dynamics and holiday stress, adding her unique comedic perspective. Her presence elevates the episode, offering listeners a blend of professional humor and genuine conversation.
As the episode wraps up, the hosts express gratitude to Ali Breen and wish listeners a happy Thanksgiving. They reiterate the value of the advice and humor shared, ensuring that listeners feel both entertained and supported.
Bob on Phone Inventions ([02:25]): “I don’t think Alexander Graham Bell had any idea it was going to phone sex.”
Jeff on Fake News ([05:30]): “According to my binoculars, the two female coeds in the condo behind my house look to have lost their tops the other night.”
Chick on Relationship Advice ([14:34]): “What would you do if somebody got too fat for you?”
Christopher on Thanksgiving Solutions ([19:53]): “Lysistrata dry cleaners.”
Humor in Everyday Situations: The hosts adeptly use humor to navigate topics like hunting mishaps and relationship woes, making relatable content entertaining.
Listener Engagement: By addressing listener letters with genuine advice and comedic elements, the show fosters a strong connection with its audience.
Guest Integration: Featuring Ali Breen adds depth and diversity to the conversation, enhancing the episode's overall appeal.
This episode of B&T Extra successfully combines humor, relatability, and insightful discussions, embodying the essence of The BOB & TOM Show. Whether you're seeking laughs, advice, or simply a good time, this episode delivers on all fronts.