B&T Extra: Monkey's escape, Bananas, & Josh's Pizza rant

Summary

The BOB & TOM Show Free Podcast

Episode: B&T Extra: Monkey's Escape, Bananas, & Josh's Pizza Rant

Date: December 2, 2025
Hosts/Contributors: Tom Griswold, Bob Kevoian, Christy Lee, Chick, Christopher, and others

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Episode Overview

This B&T Extra episode delivers classic Bob & Tom style—mixing bizarre news stories, humorous rants, and irreverent observations. The gang first dives into a wild story about monkeys escaping a truck in Mississippi, segues into new research about bananas sabotaging smoothies, and heats up with a passionate rant about pizza and home cooking costs. Along the way, they pepper in quickfire jokes, personal anecdotes, and tongue-in-cheek banter—giving fans all the off-kilter fun they expect from the show.

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Key Segments & Discussion Points

1. Uncle B.S. Monologue—Tall Tales Galore

(02:06 – 06:38)

• Bob Kevoian delivers a rapid-fire set of outlandish stories about a made-up family member, "Uncle B.S.," who claims to have been present at pivotal moments in history, from JFK's assassination to the Alamo and Bethlehem.

• Notable for its over-the-top, satirical storytelling, poking fun at family folklore and unreliable narrators.

  Memorable Quote (03:39):
  "I was working at a school book depository in Dallas, Texas. Houghton Mifflin had just come out with that new math..." —Bob Kevoian as Uncle B.S.

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2. Monkey Escape on the Mississippi Highway

(06:45 – 09:51 and again at 14:48 – 15:43)

• Christy Lee reports that several rhesus monkeys escaped after a truck overturned on a Mississippi highway; the sheriff warns they’re aggressive, and three are still on the loose.

• Discussion morphs into comedy as the gang jokes about where the monkeys came from (“Chick filled with peanut butter”—Christopher, 07:04), speculates on their origins, and riffs on the confusion of the authorities.

• Rumors about the monkeys carrying diseases are debunked, but Tom jokes, “Better to test things on monkeys than people, right?” (08:46)

• The group launches into a parody of The Monkees’ theme song, tweaking the lyrics to reflect the animal escape (“Here we come…flying down the street, fell out the back of a truck now hungry and nothing to eat…”—Christopher, 09:08).

• Later, concerns about the monkeys spreading disease are revisited, with playful apprehension about what the monkeys might be carrying: “Oh my God. Chlamydia.” (14:53)

  Memorable Quote (08:04):
  “So they backpedaled on that.” — Tom Griswold, on conflicting news about disease risk.

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3. Banana Drama: Smoothie Sabotage & Dietary Debates

(10:15 – 12:07)

• Research Segment: Scientists at UC Davis find bananas can drastically reduce absorption of flavonols—compounds important for heart and brain health—when included in smoothies.

• The team riffs about this new banana “danger,” with Tom suggesting, “I have switched to mango. I use mango instead of bananas. You wouldn’t know. It’s for the texture.” (11:26)

• Banana splits come under fire—“totally overrated”—and Dairy Queen’s version in particular is disparaged.

• The convo spirals into dietary habits and personal food choices, with Tom admitting he shouldn’t eat bananas due to a food test.

  Memorable Quote (11:03):
  “Oh, God, the banana split is totally overrated.” —Guest

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4. Josh’s Pizza Rant: Who Is the Real Pizza Guy?

(12:15 – 13:38)

• Tom Griswold gripes about being cast as the show’s pizza aficionado when another team member once ate pizza for every meal for a month.

• The group discusses making pizza at home, the cost difference versus ordering, and recommend Trader Joe’s dough (“Not the garlic, but that’s delightful.”)

• The economics of homemade versus store-bought pizza are dissected, with one contributor humorously noting you can spend $50 for the equivalent of a $12 pie from a pizza place.

  Memorable Quote (12:29):
  “I get a little angry because we have the world’s foremost pizza eater in the studio—a man who ate pizza for every meal. One month!” —Tom Griswold

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5. Parenting and Scheduling: App Talk & Kids’ Activities

(13:39 – 14:47)

• Casual conversation about managing kids’ schedules with digital calendar apps (Skylight app).

• Banter about children’s daily routines, crafts, and the importance of staying active, wrapped with dad-joke flair.

  Memorable Quote (14:30):
  “You can’t let your kids get flabby.” —Christopher

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6. Dentist-Detested Foods: Surprising Health Risks

(15:53 – 21:12)

• Christopher reveals, per Mental Floss, the five foods dentists loathe: dried fruit, apples (whole), white bread, popcorn, and ice.

• Group jokes about dental conspiracies (“If you’re a dentist and want a new boat, don’t you want clients who need dental work?”), and trade personal dental mishaps (crowns cracked on Pad Thai peanuts, popcorn gums).

• The ice segment takes a left turn into sexuality when it’s mentioned that eating ice is supposedly linked to sexual frustration.

• There’s playful pushback and laughter over favorite sandwich spreads, from Miracle Whip to mayonnaise and avocado.

• The group wraps up absurdly, suggesting the next food warning will be about “ice cream and meth.”

  Memorable Quote (19:20):
  “I ate so much Thai food just to please my dentist, I thought it might curry favor.” —Tom Griswold

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7. **Closing Banter:

“Milk Duds” and Joke Reflections**
(20:52 – 21:31)

• The group digresses into candy talk; Milk Duds become the butt of the joke (pun intended).

• Tom reflects that not every joke is a homerun, sometimes just “trying to get on base.”

  Memorable Quote (21:28):
  “I wasn’t swinging for the fences. I just wanted to get on base.” —Tom Griswold

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• On the Monkey Escape:
  “I’m sure it’s for some sort of st—” (07:50, Guest, trailing off, letting listeners fill in ‘testing’)
• On Bananas & Flavanols:
  “Participants who drank a banana smoothie had nearly 85% lower flavanol levels compared to a berry smoothie.” (10:46, Guest)
• On Homemade Pizza Economics:
  “You can go to Trader Joe’s or Whole Foods or Kroger and get all the ingredients to make a pizza. And for 50 bucks, you can make the same pizza you could buy for 12 bucks.” (13:22, Guest)
• On Dental Advice:
  “Dried fruit—raisins, figs, and apricots—have a sticky texture that clings to enamel…” (16:03, Guest)
• On Ice Chewing and Sex:
  “Psychologists say if you chomp ice, you want to have sex with… Pack up one.” (20:05, Tom Griswold)

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Overall Tone and Style

Irreverent, quick-witted, and often sarcastic, the BOB & TOM crew keeps the conversation moving with punchlines, puns, and side commentary on everyday life and oddball news. The flow stays loose and improvisational, with each topic serving as fuel for further tangents and good-natured ribbing.

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Time-stamped Guide to Key Segments

• Tall Tales & Uncle B.S.: 02:06–06:38
• Monkey Escape & Monkey Song Parody: 06:45–09:51; 14:48–15:43
• Bananas in Smoothies & Pizza Rant: 10:15–13:38
• Parenting Schedules & App Chat: 13:39–14:47
• Dentist-Reviled Foods & Food Riffs: 15:53–21:12
• Milk Duds and Joke Debrief: 20:52–21:31

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Final Thoughts

This episode provides classic BOB & TOM: expertly-mixed absurd news, scientific trivia gone awry, and personal quirks, all doused with wit and playful banter. The daily “extra” format gives space for longer riffs and deeper dives into what would otherwise be passing moments, maintaining a pace and unpredictability unique to this long-running comedy radio team.

Transcript

[Progressive Insurance Announcer]

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[Netflix Promo Announcer]

This episode is brought to you by Netflix. Global superstar and comedy sensation Kevin Hart returns for his fifth Netflix special. Acting My Age I'm not the same.

[Christopher]

Man that I used to be. I go down the stairs sideways.

[Bob Kevoian]

Go ahead.

[Christopher]

You in the rush, go away with.

[Netflix Promo Announcer]

A fresh perspective on life, family and getting older.

[Christopher]

Older you get, the less you can have. Is this sesame seeds on that bun?

[Tom Griswold]

Get it?

[Netflix Promo Announcer]

Kevin's bringing his signature high energy humor and physical comedy in a true return to his stand up origins. Watch Kevin Hart, Acting My Age now streaming only on Netflix.

[Show Announcer]

Welcome back. It's another Bob and Tom extra. This is Christopher. Not only is the Bob and Tom show live every weekday morning, but every afternoon we'll give you a little extra. In case you missed anything on the big show today, Monkey's escape, Bananas and Josh's Pizza Rant. It's on the way. Next.

[Guest or Contributor]

Close your eyes. Exhale. Feel your body relax and let go of whatever you're carrying today. Well, I'm letting go of the worry that I wouldn't get my new contacts in time for this class. I got them delivered free from 1-800-contacts. Oh, my gosh. They're so fast. And breathe. Oh, sorry. I almost couldn't breathe when I saw the discount they gave me on my first order. Oh, sorry. Namaste.

Visit 1-800-contacts.com today to save on your first order. 1-800-contacts.

[Bob Kevoian]

Everybody had that relative in their family who lies like a dog. You know, he's always kind of alone. Shows up just kind of unannounced. And in our family, his name was Benford Smith Wilson. We called him Uncle B.S. you walk up to him, uncle B. S. Where were you November 22, 1963? November 22, 1963. Let me think a second. That's the day everybody's supposed to remember where they was. I was working at a school book depository in Dallas, Texas. Houghton Mifflin had just come out with that new math and had them real thick math books and it's hard to pick them math book boxes up by yourself. And I told them, y' all gotta get somewhere in there to help me with these dang boxes. And they hired a fellow named Harvey. I can't think of his name. He'd been in the Marine Corps and I, of course in the Navy for five years. He kept bragging about what a great shot your Marine Corps was as opposed to your naval forces. I said, I tell you what, you little pink old commie bastard, this afternoon at lunch I want you to go back to your boarding house and bring back your rifle. I got two tickets to the Texas theater. Says you can't hit that manhole cover down there by that grassy knoll. You know he cracked all four shots down for president. United States didn't happen to drive by at that exact moment. We felt bad about that Uncle B.S. where were you June 6, 1944? Junior 6, 1944. Metal detector salesman, Normandy, France. Scouring the beach at four in the morning in black socks and sandals, helping a gay glass blower named Joan Hunt for a friendship bracelet. He dropped out of a pair of Speedos earlier that evening. I look out in the ocean. Tom Hanks and 100,000 surfers come running at me with ugly ass green wetsuits and enough luggage to keep a team of bellhops busy for about a month. A bullet from a sand dune parts my hair. Joan takes shrapnel in the ass. I drag him to a suntan lotion stand and wrap his butt in a beach towel tourniquet. My Geiger counter is beeping like a dope dieter at a crack house picnic. I said, joan, with this many bullets in the beach, I think you and Todd can forget about that bracelet. Hugs. Where were you in March 1836? Life insurance salesman, the Alamo, San Antonio, Texas. Counting Mexicans. Trying to get a big fella in a coon skin cap to convince 17 buddies from Tennessee they were in good hands with old don't let them Mexicans get over that wall, fellas. They'll have this place Sheetrocked in about an uncle BS where were you December 24, 1 hour BC December 24, 1 hour BC working as a part time night desk clerk. Bethlehem, Israel. Place called the North Star Motor Lodge booked up out the rear end. Trying to get my Caesar census form filled out and stock a Coke machine all at the same time. Up to my ass and caffeine free Dr. Pepper. Some Carpenter strolls in with a pregnant wife, a tired mule and a bad attitude trying to strong arm me into throwing two Roman soldiers out of room 107. I told him, Jesus Christ, man, we're in the people pleasing business. Uncle BS where were you December 1955? City bus driver, Montgomery, Alabama. Wrestling a steering wheel, trying to get a 14 year old to turn Elvis down so I could figure out how many black people I can squeeze on and still have room up front for the white folk. Best looking woman in North America crawls on my bus. Proxide hair legs up to her hind end. 40 D cup staring me right square in the eye. I'm hoping she'll sit in the third seat from the front. My eyeballing seat. I look up in the rear view mirror. Dam of Rosa Parks. And in my eyeballing seat I can sit here and look at Rosa for the next 15 miles or get her to get up and give Miss Nude Alabama her seat. Rosa knows I ain't had a date in 6 months. Pics today to turn into a civil rights murder. Just goes to show every time I see a good looking woman, somebody makes a federal case out of it.

[Guest or Contributor]

You asked for it, you got it. More Bob and Tom. This is Bob and Tom.

[Christopher]

Extra.

[Guest or Contributor]

We have Christy Lee at the SILAC Insurance news desk. We have our monkey story. This is scary.

Several monkeys escaped from a truck that overturned on a Mississippi highway. The Jasper County Sheriff's Department warns monkeys were aggressive and there are three still on the loose. The rhesus monkeys had come from Tulane University.

[Tom Griswold]

What's a rhesus monkey?

[Christopher]

Chick filled with peanut butter.

[Guest or Contributor]

It's not clear who owns them, who was transporting them, or where they were being taken. The sheriff's office said that they.

[Tom Griswold]

Wait a second. No. No idea.

[Guest or Contributor]

Well, this makes no sense. So you've got some guy driving a truck and they go, where'd the monkeys come from? What's he gonna say? I don't know.

Well, he picked up a load and he's carrying him somewhere.

One would know where he picked it up. I would think at Tulane University.

And they were on their way to.

[Tom Griswold]

New Orleans, but they don't know where in New Orleans.

[Christopher]

What do you want to know?

[Guest or Contributor]

Yeah, what do you want?

[Tom Griswold]

I want to know what I. I'm with Tom on this.

[Guest or Contributor]

He says it's not clear who owns the monkeys or who was transporting them.

Do you really want to go into this? You don't want to go into this. Let's leave it at that.

Why?

[Christopher]

I'm sure it's for some sort of st.

[Guest or Contributor]

Yes, I'm sure it is. Weren't they loaded with the monkeys, were not exposed to any infectious Agent. Even though originally it said they were full of COVID and hepatitis C. Oh.

[Tom Griswold]

So they backpedaled on that.

[Christopher]

So who believes that not everything is a Morgan Freeman movie?

[Guest or Contributor]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

In this case, I think it is really.

[Guest or Contributor]

The sheriff's department said, driver, I clearly.

Saw photographs of these monkeys jumping out of bed. I just want to say, I think this is so good.

[Christopher]

Roll over.

[Guest or Contributor]

The sheriff's department said the driver of the overturned truck told law enforcement the monkeys were dangerous and needed to be handled using personal protective equipment.

[Tom Griswold]

That's good work. I also heard that they all but three have been destroyed. Was in quotes.

[Guest or Contributor]

No way.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. They're not just. They're not recapturing these things.

[Christopher]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

So that also tells you.

[Guest or Contributor]

Yeah, that's sad.

[Tom Griswold]

But better to test things on monkeys than people, right?

[Guest or Contributor]

Yeah.

I got some people.

I'd test some stuff.

Me too. Is it. Is it fatal?

Yeah.

Painful.

[Christopher]

Why are you both looking at me?

[Guest or Contributor]

What do I.

Do you have a song to make this happy?

[Christopher]

Here we come.

[Guest or Contributor]

Loosen up.

[Bob Kevoian]

He asked for it.

[Guest or Contributor]

Loosen on the street Fell out the back of a truck now hungry and.

[Christopher]

Nothing to eat hey, hey, we're loose.

[Guest or Contributor]

Monke making Reese's monkey sounds yeah. Feces we are flinging if you try and put us down. All right. Thank you very much.

[Tom Griswold]

See?

[Guest or Contributor]

Little tribute.

[Christopher]

I'm so happy.

[Guest or Contributor]

Voice at heart. I love that song.

[Christopher]

Voice at heart, of course, wrote that.

[Tom Griswold]

But, you know, I mentioned that.

[Guest or Contributor]

Just lost one of them.

[Christopher]

Sadly, they didn't.

[Guest or Contributor]

We didn't lose him. He died.

[Christopher]

Yeah.

[Guest or Contributor]

You know, that's an elegant way to say that we miss them and we've respected their work.

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Died of boys and heart fail failure.

[Guest or Contributor]

You thought about that?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. I went, hey, there was a human who died. And I went, oh, I don't care about that person. I'm making a light joke about, you.

[Guest or Contributor]

Know, he originally hooked up. He was partners with Chuck Berry. His first group.

[Tom Griswold]

Boyce and Barry. Yes.

[Guest or Contributor]

Ladies, it's all been rescued. Thank you, Pat.

[Christopher]

And just like that, you totally redeemed me.

[Guest or Contributor]

Thank you very much.

What do monkeys eat?

[Tom Griswold]

What? Bananas.

[Guest or Contributor]

Thank you. New research suggests bananas could be sabotaging your smoothies. Healthy benefits.

This is the what.

Scientists at the University of California, Davis, investigated how a certain enzyme found naturally in many fruits and vegetables already cured cancer.

So they're going after the bananas.

Affects how the body absorbs flavonols, compounds linked to improved heart and brain health.

[Christopher]

And now with flavanol, they discovered.

[Guest or Contributor]

Doesn't that taste good? Is that what that means?

[Christopher]

It's Got to taste great.

[Tom Griswold]

There's all the flavor that.

[Guest or Contributor]

Participants who drank a banana smoothie had nearly 85% lower flavanol levels compared to a berry smoothie. What if you combine the two? Because I put a banana in my berry smoothie.

[Christopher]

Oh, let's talk about this for 20 minutes.

[Guest or Contributor]

I will go on record as saying, oh, God, the banana split is totally overrated.

No.

As a kid, I always wanted to go to Dairy Queen. I'd go with my folks. I always wanted to get one. They let me get a banana split. Horrible, delicious, Awful.

[Tom Griswold]

It depends on.

[Christopher]

Yeah.

[Guest or Contributor]

You don't put the pineapple. Oh, the pineapple. That's all that makes it double off.

Extra.

Researchers said consuming bananas is still nutritionally beneficial, but suggests you avoid mixing them with flavanol heavy foods like berries, grapes or cocoa.

[Tom Griswold]

I have switched to mango. I use mango instead of bananas. You wouldn't know. It's for the texture.

[Guest or Contributor]

Yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Exactly. The consistency is the exact same.

[Guest or Contributor]

Yeah, well, this is. But this is the reason that tequila and beer are good for you. There's no banana.

[Tom Griswold]

That's exactly what. Onion rings too.

[Christopher]

You use mango. You use a mango in your. Instead of bananas.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but.

[Christopher]

And there's no difference.

[Tom Griswold]

Consistently a consistency. Frozen mangoes. Yeah.

[Guest or Contributor]

Yeah.

You freeze them so they get you. Makes it more like a milkshake.

[Tom Griswold]

But I also check. I. There was a test I had done of what I should and shouldn't be eating. And bananas is something I personally shouldn't be.

[Christopher]

No kidding.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah.

[Guest or Contributor]

And didn't you. You had a lot of psyllium husk to cut down in the hour and a half you spend in the toilet every day.

[Tom Griswold]

I do have. I do take psyllium husk.

[Guest or Contributor]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

And I also eat plenty of fibrous foods like pizza fiber flakes.

[Christopher]

Yeah, Pizza.

[Tom Griswold]

And you know what? You know what? It's every now and again.

[Bob Kevoian]

Go ahead.

[Christopher]

No, no, please continue.

[Tom Griswold]

Every now and again.

[Christopher]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I get a little angry because we have the world's foremost pizza eater in the studio. A man who ate pizza for every meal. One month. One month. And I'm the pizza guy we're talking about. In all truthfulness.

[Christopher]

He's so upset. He can't help it.

[Guest or Contributor]

This is what happens when you lie.

[Tom Griswold]

You eat more pizza than I do. I promise you.

[Guest or Contributor]

I guarantee that's true. You eat pizza a lot.

Had homemade pizza the other night.

See.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. I didn't. I was too easy eating that Sweet, sweet.

[Guest or Contributor]

We have. We have found out that if you like.

[Bob Kevoian]

If you want.

[Guest or Contributor]

You want to make your own pizza. By the way, I recommend.

[Christopher]

I was going to ask you how much the pizza cost.

[Guest or Contributor]

That's the thing. The Trader Joe's pizza dough, not the garlic, but that's delightful.

It is good.

That's a really good. I recommend it highly. But you can go to. You can go to Trader Joe's or Whole Foods or Kroger and get all the ingredients to make a pizza. And for 50 bucks, you can make the same pizza. You could buy at many, many reputable pizza places. You can buy for 12 bucks.

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

So.

[Guest or Contributor]

But very.

[Tom Griswold]

It's about the journey, though.

[Guest or Contributor]

It is about the journey.

[Christopher]

Just for fun, what type of craft do you have slated for the girls this afternoon and. Or tonight?

[Guest or Contributor]

How you reckon their day?

[Christopher]

Because they. They want to stay in the room, maybe color, maybe watch a video, maybe play with their dolls or whatever. But you're. Here he comes.

[Guest or Contributor]

I got to look at my. My thing here. Hold on.

Oh, at your calendar.

[Tom Griswold]

I imagine it's pumpkin related. Is there.

[Guest or Contributor]

You think they. They go, man, we got to entertain dad. Let's give him something to do.

[Christopher]

Absolutely.

[Guest or Contributor]

I have my Skylight app. Let's see. Your. What we got Skylight app.

What. What's that?

A calendar app.

Shows what the kids are doing today. And let's see. Yeah, we got to work and who's.

Responsible for picking them up and.

Oh, yeah. Oh, we don't have art class today, so just workout and tutoring, so.

[Bob Kevoian]

Oh, okay.

[Guest or Contributor]

Pretty easy.

All right.

[Christopher]

So no, not nothing tonight like workout.

[Guest or Contributor]

And tutoring, so they have to work out.

[Christopher]

You can't let your kids get flabby.

[Bob Kevoian]

You really can't.

[Tom Griswold]

If only my parents have worked me out, I probably would have banged.

[Guest or Contributor]

I know you're 900.

Just go outside and play.

[Christopher]

You eat a cookie. A lifetime on a moment on your lips A lifetime on your hip. You know that you don't want to go outside.

[Guest or Contributor]

They might run into those wild rhesus monkeys.

Oh, my God.

Chlamydia.

I don't know.

Some recent monkey bit him.

[Tom Griswold]

The original story said they all had herpes. Hep C and Covid. Right?

[Christopher]

They all had.

[Progressive Insurance Announcer]

Yeah.

[Guest or Contributor]

Then they backed off on that real quick.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, you can't tell them the truth.

[Bob Kevoian]

They're gonna panic.

[Guest or Contributor]

I'm skeptical, but don't you think they.

[Christopher]

They probably get kind of sick the same way we do, and they wouldn't feel like wilding or whatever going on.

[Guest or Contributor]

Yeah, they're probably miserable if they were.

[Bob Kevoian]

Loaded with that stuff.

[Christopher]

Who's to say, Covid, I didn't Want to do anything.

[Guest or Contributor]

It seems weird that they get picked up at a university and the university denies that they're being experimented. I don't know what's going on.

[Tom Griswold]

This was.

[Guest or Contributor]

Whoever denied that they were. They were infectious. That's what they denied. They did not deny they were not being researched, if you will.

[Tom Griswold]

Maybe they were being researched in good ways. Yeah. How many orgasms can a monkey have?

[Guest or Contributor]

Maybe they were all. They're all joining frats. You're the guys at vgos have a new monkey.

[Christopher]

Have you heard about the orgasm study?

[Guest or Contributor]

Not all healthy foods are created equal. There are at least five foods that dentists ate.

[Tom Griswold]

All right.

[Guest or Contributor]

You ready?

[Bob Kevoian]

Yes.

[Guest or Contributor]

According to mental floss.

[Christopher]

Sure.

[Guest or Contributor]

Dentists despise number one, dried fruit raisins. Figs and apricots have a sticky texture that clings to enamel and traps natural sugars against your teeth, increasing, of course, the risk of cavity.

I have a question. Wouldn't you if you were a dentist? If you want that new boat, don't you want your clients to have. Need a lot of dental work?

Yeah.

Will they pass out raisins when I leave? I don't know about you.

Yeah.

Apples. Apples hiding into an apple hole can chip enamel or damage.

[Christopher]

Would you call him Apple?

[Guest or Contributor]

Not just apple hole. Okay.

Dentists instead recommend cutting apples into slices.

[Tom Griswold]

And how do I eat mine in slices?

[Guest or Contributor]

How do I eat mine in slices? I like them in slices. Better.

[Bob Kevoian]

Not really.

[Guest or Contributor]

Kind of on the air.

[Tom Griswold]

You never hear me crunch and slurp an apple. Yeah, every now and then. Oh, I'm sorry.

[Christopher]

Remember you got somebody told you to stop eating. Remember that?

[Guest or Contributor]

You got a text yesterday about it.

[Progressive Insurance Announcer]

All right.

[Guest or Contributor]

Five foods dentists hate. White bread. Refined white bread breaks down into sugar as you chew while the gummy texture packs food in between the gaps of your teeth, increasing the risk of cavities and gummy texture.

There's a study done by the Rye Bread Institute for the further sale of our.

The same goes for other starchy foods like rice, pasta and potato chips.

[Tom Griswold]

And they did this whole study on BLTs and how. Whether or not they're good for you. Did you see that study out of the Mayo Clinic? Was that cute?

[Guest or Contributor]

That's cute.

You can't. You know, something you can't have for a second? This is the problem. I. I thought you were serious. Why would anybody study BLTs other than an opportunity to have a BLT, which is delightful every day.

[Christopher]

You can't have a BLT without mayonnaise. Mayonnaise?

[Guest or Contributor]

Yeah, you can.

[Christopher]

No yes, you do.

[Guest or Contributor]

Avocado.

Blt. There's no bltm.

Avocado. Well, it makes everything better.

[Christopher]

What about Miracle Whip?

[Guest or Contributor]

I do like avocado.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm over Miracle Whip because I grew up on it.

[Guest or Contributor]

Same.

I can't do it.

[Tom Griswold]

I much prefer regular mayonnaise, bacon lettuce.

[Guest or Contributor]

Tomato and mayonnaise sandwich. It's a blt. Bacon, lettuce and tomato.

[Christopher]

I'm sure a dairy farmer would endorse Miracle Whip.

[Guest or Contributor]

So. What?

[Bob Kevoian]

Wet and go put on it.

[Guest or Contributor]

Miracle Whip is awesome.

Nothing.

Put any wet ingredient on your blt.

I don't put a wet ingredient on any of my sandwiches. None? None. Mustard.

Ketchup.

[Christopher]

No wonder you're so dry. Look at her. How dry she is.

[Bob Kevoian]

How dry I am.

[Guest or Contributor]

How wet I'll be if I don't find the bathroom key.

That was just recently. Popcorn. Not only popcorn can get stuck, of course. Between your teeth.

[Christopher]

How do you eat popcorn?

[Guest or Contributor]

The husks can wedge into gums and cause irritation or infection. Dry with salt.

[Christopher]

With salt.

[Guest or Contributor]

God.

[Tom Griswold]

Just something.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yes.

[Guest or Contributor]

Now I will confess. I had to go to the dentist once to get a pop piece of popcorn removed from my gum.

I broke two teeth. Two have two crowns. Because of those little tiny peanuts that are in. What's the Indian food that I like?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, your pad Thai.

[Guest or Contributor]

Pad Thai. Oh, yes.

Broke your teeth on him.

Yep. And then the last one is ice. Chewing ice is one of the fastest ways to damage your tooth enamel.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I. I ate so much Thai food just to please my dentist, I thought it might curry favor. Am I on fire today or what?

[Guest or Contributor]

I like I like to say or what? I really feel like I'm suddenly reading Humor in Uniform and my dad's Reader's digestion from the 50s.

[Tom Griswold]

Every now and again I go, you know, I should say something that would please my grandparents. I just talk about weenie sweet. Yeah.

[Guest or Contributor]

Chewing ice can also cause splintering of your teeth, wear down fillings, and even crack your crown.

[Tom Griswold]

So number five is ice.

[Guest or Contributor]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Guest or Contributor]

Chomp a lot of ice. And I recently learned from Josh and.

Jason that's a sexual thing.

I didn't know. I've never heard that. And I'm always. And you're sexually frustrated if you chomp ice.

[Tom Griswold]

Psychologists say if you chomp ice, you want to have sex with. Pack up one.

[Guest or Contributor]

Ah, well, yeah. It's a fact.

I see. Not. It's true.

What?

No.

You're the ones for a second.

[Tom Griswold]

So I. I don't know. I mean, dentists. Hey. Dried fruit. Not bad for you.

[Bob Kevoian]

Apples.

[Tom Griswold]

Great for you. White bread we all know is poison. Popcorn.

[Guest or Contributor]

Fine.

[Tom Griswold]

Right.

[Guest or Contributor]

Ice.

[Tom Griswold]

Fine. So just brush your teeth and be careful.

[Guest or Contributor]

Yeah, yeah. Stick to ice cream and floss.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. Iced cream is the answer.

[Guest or Contributor]

And then meth and.

[Christopher]

And Fruit roll ups.

[Guest or Contributor]

Yeah.

Mountain Dew.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Did you notice soda? Not on this list.

[Guest or Contributor]

Yeah. No.

Candy.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Milk duds? Not on this list. Like an almond.

[Guest or Contributor]

That'll crack your teeth more than a peanut.

[Tom Griswold]

Milk.

[Christopher]

Dutch Tom, you like a Milk Dud?

[Guest or Contributor]

I haven't really had one.

I do too.

[Christopher]

I don't. I can't remember the last time I had a milk.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I don't ever have to have one.

[Guest or Contributor]

What is. That's chocolate covered. What?

[Christopher]

I don't know.

[Show Announcer]

Tooth remover.

[Guest or Contributor]

Like a caramelly.

[Christopher]

Is it caramel?

[Guest or Contributor]

Yeah, it's a dot of milk.

[Christopher]

They make milk. And some milk doesn't cut it now.

[Tom Griswold]

That's right.

[Guest or Contributor]

Sometimes on the show we have a group like, you've got a. A pot of whales. Sure. Sometimes we have a dud of jokes.

[Christopher]

Oh, yes.

[Guest or Contributor]

Josh has proven this morning.

No, I enjoyed those last few. They were very, very.

[Tom Griswold]

I wasn't swinging for the fences. I just wanted to get on base.

[Christopher]

That's a smile.

[Show Announcer]

That's it for another Bob and Tom show. Extra. Catch us on itunes, Google play and stitcher for Bob and Tom. Extra. This is Christopher. Take care, everybody.

[Tom Griswold]

Limu Gamu and Doug.

[Show Announcer]

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[Tom Griswold]

Uh, Limu is that guy with the binoculars watching us?

[Show Announcer]

Cut the camera. They see us.

[Guest or Contributor]

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