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This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you ever think about switching insurance companies to see if you could save some cash? Progressive makes it easy. Just drop in some details about yourself and see if you're eligible to save money when you bundle your home and auto policies. The process only takes minutes and it could mean hundreds more in your pocket. Visit progressive.com after this episode to see if you can save Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. Potential savings will vary. Not available in all states. This episode is brought to you by Temptations Cat Treats. Your cat will come running for the perfectly irresistible Temptations Creamy Puree and Temptations Lickable Spoon Cat Treats. The best time to feed Lickable Cat Treats to your cat is anytime. Feed by hand for a playful moment in a bowl for a creamy treat or as a topper to make mealtime fun. Visit temptationstreats.com to learn more. Welcome back. It's another Bob and Tom extra. This is Christopher. Not only is the Bob and Tom show live every weekday morning, but every afternoon. We'll give you a little extra in case you missed anything on the big show today. Steamed vag plus a Great Dane story and all caps. You'll hear that in just a minute. This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. You chose to hit play on this podcast today. Smart Choice. Progressive loves to help people make smart choices. That's why they offer a tool called Auto Quote Explorer that allows you to compare your Progressive car insurance quote with rates from other companies. So you save time on the research and can enjoy savings when you choose the best rate for you. Give it a try after this episode@progressive.com, progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. Not available in all states or situations. Prices vary based on how you buy. Oh, man. Hey, Bob, are you okay? Why? Why do you ask, Tom? I noticed you're scratching your crotch and kind of clutching your chest. Yeah, well, I have jock itch and a really bad case of indigestion. Have you taken anything for it? That's just it, Tom. I don't know what to take. Here, try one of these. Okay, you're the doctor, but what is it? It's the only medicine you can take that relieves both painful indigestion and pesky jock itch at the same time. Hmm. What's it called, Bob? It's from the people who make Tums. It's called scrotums. Tom's right, Bob. New scrotums can relieve indigestion and jock itch. Just minutes. Feeling better, Bob? Oh, like a million bucks. Let me Buy you a beer? Great. And how about some nuts? Thanks. Yes. Thanks to scrotums, Bob can have a handful of nuts without attracting disgusted stares or worrying about a bad case of indigestion. Scrotums, the only product on the market that relieves jock itch and indigestion at the same time. Get your hand out of the front of your pants, put it in your back pocket, pull out your wallet and buy some scrotums today. Just look for the fuzzy little bag the next time you're at the drugstore. Scro Tums from Bral Pharmaceuticals. The same people who brought you the product that relieves painful corns on your feet and itchy hot hemorrhoids. Cornhole H. Right, Bob? Righty O. It's our way of making sure you haven't missed anything. This is Bob and Tom. Extra. Hello, Chick McGee. Sorry, I'm getting. What do you got? Ran out of stirrer sticks. Fortunately, I have a. Who's in charge of orange case? Oh, my God, he's got a hole. Did not run out. They're not in his area. I. I have Josh. He had to walk to the green room to get up. I trust you. Go over there and find out how many stir sticks is in that. Look at that. That's a thousand. A thousand. Wow. Look at. Look at that. Yeah, that's a big. Almost a barrel. These are the quality ones. Oh, yeah. Because the. The cheap ones I have. You get a splinter. Oh, in my tongue. No way. Yeah, cuz see, you take them and you. You stir your coffee and you go like this. Yeah. Look. Look at that. Why would you do that? Look at that, Pat. How he sucks that straw. Because the. My boy. Because these are. These are real wood and there's a. Oh, real wood. There's a communion. There's a communion. Communion that I have with the earth. Ah, yes. They're compostable. Yeah. I haven't gotten a splinter in my tongue since I got rid of that marionette. I enjoyed it. Thank you. Yeah, She. I was done with her. I was a she. Yeah. Yeah. She wanted a relationship with all kinds of strings attached. Oh, boo. I ruined it. That was wonderful. I ruined it. No. Wonderful. That was low hanging fruit. That's the tastiest fruit. Okay. That's the most. Right. There were strings attached, Tom. A genuine boo. Yeah. Okay. Now we just discovered we had a news story about what you're supposed to eat and not eat before you go to bed, and it's fairly obvious you don't drink coffee, etc. Etc. I didn't realize. What if you're eating another person? Oh, my God. More or less. We have a. I'm going somewhere here. Okay. Sorry. In the course of this, Ms. Jess Hooker announced that she had, in fact, on a couple of occasions, experienced the coffee enema. Now, I found this. Apparently Gwyneth Paltrow, the actress who has that organization called Goop, Remember this? She's got all kinds of I do good work tree hugging, moronic things to do. She's the one that was having people buy some kind of herbs and they would steam their vaginas. Called a yoni steam. Yeah. Important do ladies? It is important. Yeah. Well, I was making a joke. I did that too. I did all of it. Well, not at once. I hope you did that. You did the yoni. Yoni steam. Yeah. You get a yoni stool and you set it up and you sit on it. It looks like an adult sized potty chair. Basically. Yeah. You have to buy a special stool. You don't have to. You can. I didn't. But yeah, you can. Then you put like a. A sterno can underneath the. You don't heat. You don't heat it at the source. You heat it before and then you transport it into like. And this is supposed to purify your mommy parts? It is. They're fine the way they are. According to Ars Technica. Gwyneth Paltrow's lifestyle website. Already. I hate it. Do you have a life? No, I have a lifestyle. I. I model it after John Travolta in his disco peak. No, Goop is the name of the organization. They're touting the purported benefits of a $135 coffee enema. They recommend the implant o Rama, a glass bottle with silicone tubes attached, which allows the user to squirt coffee into their rear end. Well, they didn't try hard with implant O Rama. According to Implanta, Palooza was taken. According to actual physicians, scientists, coffee enemas have been associated with burns, infections, sepsis, and rectal perforation. Yikes. This is my favorite quote. This particular physician refers to it as a triumph of ignorance over science, which, by the way, is. That's pretty good. Is the world we live in. But you did in fact, try the coffee enema. I did a couple of times, yeah. I'd love to do their commercials. He never asked for a second enema at home. Hey, no, don't fill it to the rim with brim. You'll spill it all over my jeans. You guys rock. My old pot guy in Michigan now, we've had been having a running. People have been emailing us for some reason. Yeah. Dealers and their exotic pets. Right. We had a skunk. We had an alligator. We have now an old pot guy in Michigan Chris says had seven Great Danes. Wow. And three boobies. Bovies. B O U V I E S. Those are dogs that wore sunglasses like Jackie Kennedy. She was a bouvier. That's very funny. So stupid. I don't know what that dog. These dogs, all 10 of them, would circle them. I think bovies are like, primarily really dark black or brown dogs. And they look like bears. Oh, they do. They would be ready to shred me at his given command. Yeah. Here you are. Yeah. They look like doodles. Bovier de Flandre, it says. Oh, that's covered with ice cream. Yeah, it's a herding dog from Belgium. They look like giant, very muscular poodles or schnauzers. Oh, yeah, schnauzer. The ones here look scary. They're black with the beady eyes and crop their ears. Have you ever had a Great Dane surprise you, like, not expect to see it. And we had an old, old neighborhood. There were three Great Danes. And, like, look at those horses. And he kept them in the backyard. And I would go to make my turn, and those things are just boom. They look like dinosaurs. Really? I think they're gorgeous. Yeah. How many? This guy here. 3. And the yard wasn't that big. That's a lot of cleanup. But I mean, great. They're so lovable, though. Yeah. We had one when we were kids. Brutus. Oh. Probably not for long. My dad. My dad. Yeah. Really? They have hip problems and also. Oh, they do. I mean, I think they're as handsome as anything, but. Yeah. I won't tell you the whole story. Oh, but did it end with a car? It was. It was. It was in a car. Oh, yeah. I put my money on the Great Dane. The essence of the story is, especially if it's a Hugo. Right, Tom? No, the essence of the story was a Volvo. Oh, this is a friend of mine. How do I tell it without getting too he. His beautiful Great Dane had. Had died at the vet. Oh. And his wife, who he fortunately shed a couple years after this. His wife. Oh, she was. You look up the. There's her picture, just a rolling. Yeah. She insisted on. She wanted to bury the dog in their backyard. Okay. No cremation. Like Elvis. Now, I should point out they lived in a neighborhood where this really wasn't the kind of thing you would do. Gotcha they lived in a beautiful, beautiful home. Right. Backing up to a gorgeous golf course. The larger point here is. So he goes down to pick up the. The deceased Great Dane at the vet, and he has them put it in the back of a Volvo station wagon. Right. It's. It's raining really, really hard. Well, this is only half the story. No, here we go. Pulls up to a light, a guy walks up, puts a gun to his head. I'm totally serious. Gun to his head. He was. He was carjacked. What? He gets out of the car, you know, just take it. Yeah. And these guys drive off with the dead. With the. They don't know that there's a dead gray Dane in the back. And I kind of always wondered. They never recovered the car or anything? No. Oh, my gosh. But I mean, can you imagine you're. You take it to wherever you take it to strip it or whatever you do with a stolen Volvo station wagon, and that's what they found. Guy opens up the. Opens up the hatch back there and there's a dead. That had to be a boom. Yeah. That's amazing. But the moral of the story is he. He dumped her later on and was able to live much happier. Sorry, you've done a lot of living and a lot of cocktail party talk. What do you do? Do you always say if someone says, oh, well, Josh. Josh got a divorce. Do you always say, oh, I'm sorry, Or do you say. I mean, if you don't know anything about the situation, do you say, oh, way to go. I knew you didn't want to be in that. I honestly say, oh, how so? If you said, Josh got a divorce and say, oh, how's he doing? Yeah. Because it can go okay. Oh, yeah, because sometimes it's. It's, you know, sometimes a congratulations. Congratulations. Way to go. Right. You got to be real. You got to be real careful. Yeah. Especially if. Especially if you say something like, well, I'm glad he got rid of that hag, which. And then they get back together. Yeah, that's true. Yeah. When the circle. I can't imagine doing that. Except they just did a reason. We've all done it. Did you do it to somebody? I could see you doing it. Okay, never mind. It wasn't an official divorce, but yeah. Yeah, that'll happen. You got to be very. In any event, you got to be very careful. The thing about this show is we got to learn about a cool dog called a Bouvier de Flandre. Flander. Right. But to put a cap on Our enema history, too. Yes. Once again, Ms. Hooker described her adventures in the world of enemas. Yeah. A band, a musical aggregation has been banned. Okay. From a bar in Houston, Texas, according to this news account, after performing an on stage enema during a fundraiser. A fundraiser. A fundraiser. Yeah, it was. I don't want to go through the whole thing, but. Band we've heard of or not. No, no. On stage enema. Yeah. Save the buttons. And. Very complicated story on stage. Dig deep, you can save it. They say there was no unfortunate material on stage. The guy, the. The one guy from the band, we'll call him mc. He said, this is my art. I want to get an idea. I don't compromise my idea. Oh, good. I don't care what kind of a benefit it is. See, Josh, this is right up your alley. Yes. There's a famous punk rocker guy that did that. Oh, really? Who's that? I. I don't remember his name, but. Oh, I'm sorry. I thought it was a setup. I'm sorry. Absolutely not. Oh, no, I remember that guy. I know. He did a great. He did a great cover of the who song, Enem Front. Oh, it was the Butthole Surfer. We'll try it again. We'll try it again with a joke. Remember that? Yeah, yeah. There's a famous punk rocker guy who did that. Oh, that. Who's that? Johnny Smells Rotten. Oh, he had a nickname. His nickname. Deuce. Remember that? Yeah, give him the Deuce. Did you listen to the Butthole Surfers, Tom? No, I never. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. Fan. I'm a fan. No kidding. They did a cover of the ACDC song Duty Deeds done. I think it's time to get off this topic and move over that way because we're at the news desk with Jess Hooker. Researchers say adding too many periods in a text message can make them more emotionally intense. To the readers. And ladies, same thing. You're guilty of this, right, Thomas? I'm guilty, too. I do the I love ellipses period. It should only be three. That's my issue. Yeah, but what is it? Ellipsis. Ellipses. If you. If you dictate in your phone, if you say ellipsis, it'll put three dots, and then you go from there. Then you. I put that between phrases to separate ideas. See, that's how I do it for people who don't know how to use proper punctuation. Well, it's. I. Right. I get it. It. Yeah, we know you were an English major, but it's. We all know Once. Always in English. He reads books. But it. But for me, it's grandma grammar. Naz, I need you to. I need you to break from the reading, absorb what I text you, take it in, and then move on to the next sentence. That's why I do all of the. Yeah, but you know Willie. Willie gets on me about it because he said when you text me like that, I think you're mad at me. Yeah, he doesn't said that. Tom too. Yeah, he doesn't like it and I do it all the time. That's on Willie. He's wrong. Yeah, I. I. Because I don't. I don't ever assign any kind of emotion. Of course not. No. But this says. It says. Researchers showed. That's why I was that Adam. Researchers showed college students various text message that had different forms of punctuation. All right. Messages that included periods after every word were given higher emotional intensity ratings. That's so silly. After every word? Yeah. If it says go period F, period yourself. Oh, no, no, that is a good way. That is a creative way to. Y. Will sometimes say oh, period. My goodness. And it's like. It's shock value. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's fun. Yes. Yeah. I. I always put an ellipsis prior to an exclamation point because otherwise it looks like an L. I don't. I can't help you here. I can't help you here, Tom. That's not the case at all. I don't. So. But I. I don't do the period after each word. All caps, though, is universally understood to mean you're yelling. Yes. Oh, yeah. I mean, I think. Or I'm just trying to make a point. I think. Yeah. I think it is universal. Yeah. Yeah. And. But. But I can read it both ways. That you're either excited or mad. Like, I have the sense. Context really does play a big. I did not know that that the wiggly and the italics the different for text was on the phone already. Yeah. Did you see it? I sent it to you. Italics. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It. Yeah, you can. You can make certain words pop. Yeah. Yeah. That's really a good effect. Is that like where the happy birthday and it comes up shooting glitter and that kind of thing, but it's just in the text itself and it'll. It'll pop out at you kind of Zucker. Can you do it for bad words? Yeah, you can do it for whatever you want. I'll see. Jesso was very nice. She texted me this earlier. So much talking as. As Pops out by you and you're saying nothing and big capital letters. Was that a mid show text? I think it might have co worker. Yes. Yes. It was a part of a group text. I hate you both so much right now. You've got it. I don't know what I did. Oh, wait, this is a group text that I'm not on. You're not on? Oh, I love when. I love. I love when they're secret about you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This one should be about you if you're not in the text. Yeah, it's not so much talking and saying nothing can you buy. I think. I think the answer I think I know is yes. Emojis that aren't on the phone already. Yes. And in the new update, there is an app on your phone now where you can create using like an AI type program to make your own emojis. I could type in like sad clown in a yarmulke and it's gonna make. Wow. Yeah, it's gonna. That's Jackie Mason so depressed. I can't believe it. What? Hunka hunka. Okay, Pat's got his guitar out. That means it's time for some entertainment. Hopefully it's got an intro. That's the days of no mobile phones for those precious times when you want to be alone. If your girlfriend was mad and you needed some space, you took a drive without a phone and no one's in your face. I told her we'll talk a little later, I gotta take a nap. But she's messaging me now and she's texting in all caps, all caps, all caps, all caps, all caps. Gone are the emojis. She's texting in all caps. I can delete the text, but I dare not block. Gotta ride out the storm. When her caps are unlocked, this could be hours, could be days. With an Irish temper fueled by chardonnay. I'm trying to sleep. Here comes more crap. Oh, you know she's mad cause she's texting on all caps, all caps, all caps, all caps, all caps. I see the bubbles. I'm in trouble. She's texting it. All caps, all caps, all caps. Get it? You're mad just texting on all caps, all caps. Oh, she's texted in all caps. There's the door. You know what really ruins the flow of an all caps messages? If you have to add a number and then the all caps goes away. I. I infuriates me. I'm not done with all caps. I just wanted to put an eight in there. Huh. I didn't know it did that. Oh, yeah. Really, really sticks in my crawl, you know? Bothers me. Huh? Why do you have to hit the uppercase button to put a question mark somewhere? I see what you're saying on a regular keyboard and that should be. Why can't be standard. That should be in the regular side. I don't need to shift it. Why can't the keyboard know the most, what I type the most and have those symbols and letters. We'll get there on the keyboard. Yeah. Because I already know it'll suggest words that I've used. So, like, you want to go online and you just hit one button, it goes, porn, porn, porn, porn, porn, porn, porn. And then you just get it. Oh, Eddie put a porn button in his. Not leave my hand free. You know what bothers me? You know? Bothers me. What bothers you? Tell us. When you text your ex wife for any reason, there should be an alarm that goes, are you sure you want to send this to your. There should. There should be a pause button. Yeah, you should have. You should have a little bit of pause. Yeah. And there should also be some maybe back in the day pat for you, a some kind of finger surface detection button that just checks your alcohol level. I think there's a lot of people that should have a text breathalyzer. Yeah. I don't just live like me and complete. Look at me in my clean line. Control of your emotions. Will you guys let me talk? No, There was clearly a joke coming. Oh, well, you couldn't shut your mouth. Let's hear. Don't worry. Everybody. Everybody calm down. Oh, he's got the double bird. You'll get nothing from me. This break. The double wrong. Ladies and gentlemen, what you just heard Josh Arnold and his scene. That's it for another Bob and Tom show. Extra. Catch us on itunes, Google Play and stitcher for Bob and Tom. Extra. This is Christopher. Take care, everybody. Bravo TV star Lala Kent holds nothing back. There's been so many times where I'm like, I apologize that I said that, but that wasn't meant for you to hear. Feel you there. How fun would it be to bring in some Bravo liberties and. And make our own bracket iconic? All right, I'll take Dorinda, you take Sonia. Sonia is who I wish I could be. You and me both. I cannot be someone in the program. What's PTO pay time off. See, you've never had a real job. Give them Lala. It is nothing but honesty. You guys know. Follow and listen on your favorite platform.