B&T Extra: Things stuck in Orifices, & Birds mysteriously exploding

Summary

Podcast Summary: B&T Extra – Things Stuck in Orifices & Birds Mysteriously Exploding

Podcast Information:

• Title: The BOB & TOM Show Free Podcast
• Hosts: Bob and Tom
• Episode: B&T Extra: Things Stuck in Orifices, & Birds Mysteriously Exploding
• Release Date: July 4, 2025
• Description: The BOB & TOM show blends comedy, talk, news, and sports, broadcasted nationwide from 6 to 10 AM EST. Subscribers can listen to the entire show and access additional content through B&T Extra at 3 PM daily.

---

Introduction

The episode kicks off with brief sponsorship messages from Progressive Insurance and Greenlight, setting a humorous and light-hearted tone. Host Tom introduces the segment, "B&T Extra," highlighting the episode's focus on unusual emergency room visits and mysterious bird incidents.

Segment 1: Things Stuck in Orifices

Overview: Bob and Tom delve into a compilation of bizarre items that have been lodged in various body orifices, drawing from the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission's database of emergency room visits.

Key Discussions:

• Rectal Incidents:

  • Toilet Brush Mishap: Bob introduces a case where a patient inserted a toilet brush into their rectum. Tom humorously speculates on the scenario:
    • Bob [05:35]: "If we start with butts, then we have to go over to here."
    • Tom [05:54]: "Pretty dirty. If you're working with the brush, you're serious?"
  • Vibrator Egg: A patient is unsure if a vibrator egg was passed in stool.
    • Bob [07:15]: "Patient said vibrator egg and not sure if it was passed in stool."
    • Tom [08:19]: "I'm not surprised by that."

• Miscellaneous Objects:

  • Glass Bottle: A patient accidentally inserted a 16-ounce glass bottle into the rectum.
    • Bob [05:45]: "I was sent in by my wife for a possible 16-ounce glass bottle and rectum."
  • Fishing Pole & Crochet Needle: Tom and Bob discuss the absurdity of these objects being lodged inside.
    • Tom [09:03]: "Oh no. It's got to be like a pocket fisher. Can't be the whole spinning reel or bait. Ca trouble."

• Unusual Items:

  • Drumstick and Cell Phone Charger: The hosts explore instances involving a drumstick and a 14-inch cell phone charger.
    • Bob [16:31]: "All right, I'm gonna make you squirm now because this is gonna go inside your peen."
    • Tom [17:21]: "Shove my phone in there."

Notable Quotes:

• Tom [08:03]: "That's something, isn't that something?"
• Bob [10:45]: "Here's another one. Patient said he had a few beers, placed a long wax candle into his rectum..."

Humorous Exchanges: Bob and Tom infuse humor into each case, often exaggerating scenarios for comedic effect. Their banter highlights the absurdity of the situations, making light of serious emergency room visits.

Segment 2: Birds Mysteriously Exploding

Overview: Transitioning from human mishaps, the hosts address reports of birds in the Bay Area mysteriously exploding, initially thought to be due to electrocution but later attributed to pellet guns or slingshots.

Key Discussions:

• Incident Reports:

  • Residents reported finding multiple dead birds with injuries indicative of trauma from small projectile weapons.
    • Bob [18:19]: "Authorities in California are investigating reports of birds mysteriously, quote, unquote, exploding."

• Possible Causes:

  • Slingshots and Pellet Guns: Tom suggests that children using slingshots might be responsible.
    • Tom [18:25]: "Somebody is out there. Just kids."

• Hosts' Theories:

  • They humorously speculate on potential motives, including the idea of children at car washes or performance artists interacting with birds.
    • Bob [19:27]: "When was the last time you tried to potty train a bird?"
    • Tom [19:39]: "That is interesting. You know those performance bells, those performance art guys that are living statues?"

Notable Quotes:

• Tom [19:14]: "I think the suspect. The way to find this. Find someone who spent a lot of money at a car wash on a consistent basis."
• Bob [19:35]: "When was the last time you tried to potty train a bird?"

Humorous Exchanges: The duo continues their comedic exploration, intertwining absurd theories with playful banter about performance artists and the challenges of understanding bird behavior.

Conclusion

Bob and Tom wrap up the episode with a segue into other content, including a mention of the Jim Rome sports podcast. They maintain their signature humor, encouraging listeners to follow and engage with their additional shows.

Closing Remarks:

• Bob [20:11]: "That's it for another Bob and Tom show. Extra."
• Tom [20:11]: "Catch us on iTunes, Google Play and Stitcher. For Bob and Tom Extra..."

Final Thoughts

This episode of B&T Extra masterfully blends dark humor with bizarre real-life anecdotes, keeping listeners entertained while discussing unusual and often laugh-inducing topics. Bob and Tom's chemistry shines as they navigate through stories of objects stuck in body orifices and the mysterious deaths of birds, offering both laughs and a touch of absurdity.

Notable Highlights:

• The humorous handling of sensitive and bizarre medical cases.
• Engaging dialogues that balance comedy with storytelling.
• Insightful yet amusing takes on strange events, like the exploding birds.

Recommendation: Fans of light-hearted, comedic discussions on unusual topics will find this episode particularly entertaining. The hosts' ability to infuse humor into even the most bizarre subjects makes for an engaging and memorable listen.

Transcript

[Bob]

This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. You chose to hit play on this podcast today. Smart Choice Progressive loves to help people make smart choices. That's why they offer a tool called Auto Quote Explorer that allows you to compare your Progressive car insurance quote with rates from other companies so you save time on the research and can enjoy savings when you choose the best rate for you. Give it a try after this [e-mail] Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates not available in all states or situations.

[Tom]

Prices vary based on how you buy. This episode is brought to you by Greenlight. Get this Adults with financial literacy skills have 82% more wealth than those who don't. From swimming lessons to piano classes, us parents invest in so many things to enrich our kids lives. But are we investing in their future financial success? With Greenlight, you can teach your kids financial literacy skills like earning, saving and investing. And this investment costs less than that. After school treat start prioritizing their financial education and future today with a risk free [e-mail] Spotify greenlight.com Spotify welcome back. It's another Bob and Tom Extra. This is Christopher. Not only is the Bob and Tom show live every weekday morning, but every afternoon we'll give you a little extra. In case you missed anything on today's big show, Things stuck in orifices and birds mysteriously exploding. It's coming up in just a minute. This episode brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you ever find yourself playing the budgeting game? Shifting a little money here, a little there and hoping it all works out well? With the name your price tool from Progressive, you can get a better budgeter and potentially lower your insurance bill too. You tell Progressive what you want to pay for car insurance and they'll help find you options within your budget. Try it [e-mail] Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates Price and coverage match limited by state law not available in all states. These classic rocks. Something about Mary, Meet the Parents and a long King Poly. And even if you were slightly lukewarm about Starsky and Hutch and Envy and perhaps you even forgot about Mystery Men and never even saw the Duplex, then you don't want to miss the movie event of the summer. Ben Stiller Is Ben Stiller in the new smash hit There's Something About Ben Stiller. Yes, the hardest working man with eight like features in show business is back with his greatest project ever. While four out of every five movies released today stars Ben Stiller, this is the one everybody is raving about. Just listen to what audience are saying about Ben Stiller's performance as Ben Stiller is in the movie. There's something about Ben Stiller.

[Bob]

I liked it because it had plenty.

[Tom]

Of scenes with Ben Stiller, man. When Ben Stiller was at his fiance's parents house and he thought he'd killed his grandma. And the Barrett bit him in the crotch while he was checking his manhood in the mirror. Then the toilet overflowed so he had to strip naked and climb out on the roof. And the neighbor's kid hit him in the crotch with a Frisbee. And then the police came and fired tear gas and hit him in the crotch. But his fiance loved him anyway. Well, it was like every Ben Stiller movie, except even more so. Critics agree this is the role the simian man child that is Ben Stiller was born to play. If you're a fan of mishaps, antics and hijinks, then run, don't walk to see Ben Stiller as Ben Stiller in There's Something about Ben Stiller.

[Bob]

I liked it when Ben Stiller peeled.

[Tom]

The banana with his own feet. Anyone who has that much flatulence has to be funny. Don't miss Ben Stiller as Ben Stiller in There's Something About Ben Stiller. Directed by Ben Stiller, produced by Stiller Ben Productions, the division of All My Nuts Enterprises. Now some more Bob and Tom. You want it, you need it. You can't live without it. This is Bob and Tom. Extra. Hello, Tom. Hello, Chick McGee. Hello. But right now we're talking to Christy Lee.

[Bob]

Based on the US Consumer Product Safety Commission's data. Database. Database.

[Tom]

Data of a database is a place where all the clocks are melting. Sorry. Heavy man. Everyone has. Everyone has pencil. Pencil thin mustaches.

[Bob]

Those of you who are watching the pit, they apparently make sure that they know exactly what's going on in emergency rooms all over the country. The old consumer products.

[Tom]

I'm going to be in Pittsburgh this week and I'm going to see if that show is true. I'm going to wind up in that er. See what happens. Yeah.

[Bob]

Defector has compiled a list of items that were stuck in people in very various orifices.

[Tom]

Oh, all right, here we go. Would you want to. Do you want to like name the object and we have to figure out the orifice.

[Bob]

Well, I have. I can't.

[Tom]

Yes.

[Bob]

I mean I. I have a.

[Tom]

A list of them by orifice or by object.

[Bob]

I have a list of objects, but I don't know where they go in What.

[Tom]

Okay.

[Bob]

But I do have. I have My own list of things.

[Tom]

That you've stuck in. Oh, my God. Let's start with butts. Okay.

[Bob]

If we start with butts, then we have to go over to here.

[Tom]

That's pretty presumptuous.

[Bob]

Do you want to guess or do you want to.

[Tom]

No, no. You can reach action figures.

[Bob]

Action figures stuck in the butt. That's right. And an action figure figure head stuck in the butt.

[Tom]

I want. I want specific action. I want to know.

[Bob]

It doesn't say which one.

[Tom]

Boba Fett, Fruits and vegetables.

[Bob]

That's not on here. I have a toilet brush.

[Tom]

That's a brush. Well, that's not a handle or brush.

[Bob]

It just says toilet brush. I don't know which end.

[Tom]

Pretty dirty. If you're. If you're working with. With the brush. You're serious? Yeah. But I would think you could get that out. Well, yeah, with the handle. Sure. Oh, these are one stock.

[Bob]

These are stock. Well, maybe the vacuum was too much and you couldn't pull it out.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Bob]

Plastic toy fish, huh?

[Tom]

Like one of those singing ones that you put on the wall or just a regular one. Yeah, yeah. Billy Butt. Oh, not Billy Ass. Very good. I chose to grow the more gentlemanly way. Yeah. Yeah. That's what you.

[Bob]

Emergency room visit. This was said by a patient. I was sent in by my wife for a possible 16 ounce glass bottle and rectum.

[Tom]

Oh, boy, oh, boy. And you got to be careful of where you o. Bottle. I mean, I love Mexican Coke, but not that much.

[Bob]

Piece of a lamp.

[Tom]

A piece of a lamp. Well, take another piece of my lamp now, baby. Oh, man, you hope it wasn't the bulb. Well, no, we. We had a picture of it. Different thing if it was a little string and then you pulled it and then it turned the light on. On the guy. Oh, yes. Yeah.

[Bob]

What about a ratchet wrench?

[Tom]

Yeah, I tried that. Now would you go metric?

[Bob]

Patient entered the ER complaining of rectal pain. Admitted to inserting sex toys six months prior.

[Tom]

Yeah, that's right. I admit it. Yeah.

[Bob]

Do you think I'd been up there for six months?

[Tom]

Yeah, well, the batteries ran out. That would. Why wouldn't that kill. Change the battery. How would you. Would things pass by?

[Bob]

I don't know.

[Tom]

How did they cry?

[Bob]

I don't.

[Tom]

So in the rectum. You're right. I think things would just pass by. It's. I. It's like a highway and you have a bypass. Right. Somebody just does that automatically. So he's down to one lane, if you will. Right. Boy, that's something, isn't that something?

[Bob]

Patient said vibrator egg and not sure if it was passed in stool.

[Tom]

I don't know if I crap this thing out, doc or not.

[Bob]

You need to look up there and see.

[Tom]

Will you go see, please? You know, this is your fourth visit here this week. I don't think you're here for this. You're not here for the procedure, are you?

[Bob]

What about a vegetable peeler?

[Tom]

Peeler? That's handle for sure. Whoa, that's gonna hurt. That's gotta be handle.

[Bob]

Oh man, a fist sized water balloon.

[Tom]

Well, hang on a second. Let's see what orifice we're talking about. So is the water still in says water balloon?

[Bob]

I would ass the water would be in it.

[Tom]

That can't be easy to cram into your butt without it bursting. It'll either burst. Take a look at the orifice. Wheel it anus. There we go. Oh, here we go. I wonder if you probably have to use a plunging device like you're loading a revolutionary warrior. A gun like a. Like a tamper. A tamper? Yeah, for. For a blunderbuss.

[Bob]

These are all still in the rectum. A fishing pole.

[Tom]

Oh no. It's got to be like a pocket fisher. Can't be the whole spinning reel or bait. Ca trouble.

[Bob]

Look, still on a crochet needle.

[Tom]

Oh, I can see that. That one at least kind of makes sense because it's the right shape. It's conical. I mean, this is all non. No, I know what you mean. Yeah. Yeah. You know though, and it makes sense after what we've already heard. Yes, this reasonable ice cream cone. What? Well, that would. I. I'd go waffle cone because it tapers. Yeah, that's probably one of those. Wouldn't it get crossed plastic ice cream cones. I can't imagine it's plastic.

[Bob]

They. Oh, you mean like a.

[Tom]

Like a kid's toy real cone.

[Bob]

Yeah, because it would just melt and wouldn't it?

[Tom]

Well, we don't know if there's ice cream in it. Yeah, that would be the waffle.

[Bob]

Like quite a treat.

[Tom]

That'd be quite a feeling. Hey, wait a minute. It's neapolin. Don't put it in strawberry first. Oh, did you use the chocolate dipped waffle cone? No, I didn't.

[Bob]

Two poker chips because of a bet.

[Tom]

Oh yeah, but you can't win or lose. Hey, check this out. All in. Yeah, yeah, like hell I won't. Don't splash the pot. Yeah, that's it. The guy that made that bet is the guy that in the. At the End of the joke. That goes, if you can't find me, I'll be hiding behind the couch. He wanted it.

[Bob]

This is a good one. Patient came in saying he was playing with a container of athletes foot spray and accidentally it ended up in his rectum.

[Tom]

That's so funny. Foot spray. And it ended up my assaying that. Well, I see the problem here, Sir. You've got 10 actin champ in your ass.

[Bob]

Here's another one. Patient said he had a few beers, placed a long wax candle into his rectum, lost balance, fell onto a couch and lost hold of the candle.

[Tom]

Don't you just light it and wait? Balanced it. Isn't there something called candling, Tom? For your ear.

[Bob]

For your ear.

[Tom]

Like an ear infection or something. You're supposed to. That helps. I don't know. That doesn't sound. Apparently that takes away the good ear wax. You got ear wax in there that you need for equilibrium.

[Bob]

Okay, one more. Billiard ball.

[Tom]

Whoa. What? What? What?

[Bob]

Number rectum.

[Tom]

No, no, no, no. You don't want to go. You don't want to go with the eight ball rectum. I don't think you heard my question correctly. You are not paying attention. What number rectum? Has anybody seen the cue ball rectum? I've got it. Well, I don't care. I assume you're breaking. No, it's a scratch. Now more tearing. Well, the ball got stuck and he couldn't get it out. He had to put four more quarters in just to get the ball out. Talk about eight ball, center pocket, huh? That's right. The butthole. And you gotta call it. That's right. Yeah, yeah, you gotta call it. Or eight ball, corner pocket. Wait a second. You know, we forgot to do What? Well, we forgot to do today in history again.

[Bob]

Well, I'm not done with things stuck in places.

[Tom]

Tough. Well, we're gonna come back to things stuck in places because it's time now to check in with Ace Cosby. Ace is back. And Ace, I know you're not in full voice yet, but let's give it a shot. Here you go. Here he is with his joke of the day. Hey, Willie. Hey. Been traveling a lot. Yeah. What state is known for their tiny soft drinks? Oh, man. What state would be known for their tiny soft drinks? I can't think. Mini soda. There it is. I don't know that. Why do I hear laughing? Yeah. Oh, there you go. More than a couple people.

[Bob]

He didn't like Minnesota.

[Tom]

I liked it when I first heard it. Delivery. Now we have more things. Is this strictly. Are we strictly stuck in the rectum or have we moved on?

[Bob]

We're done with the rectum. This is the u. S. Consumer product safety commission's database of emergency room visits. They've compiled these things that were stuck.

[Tom]

In orifices, but, I mean, once you've talked to rectums. Yeah. Nose isn't as interesting. Where are we going? Yeah, we take it back. Yeah, I forgot about that one. Go ahead, Chris.

[Bob]

Of course you did. Okay. Woman came in, said she was holding.

[Tom]

You know what? We need a drum roll for this or something. This is exciting.

[Bob]

She was holding a pen near her vagina when the cap dislodged and stuck inside, of course.

[Tom]

Is that what happened?

[Bob]

Yeah, that's what she said.

[Tom]

See, here's. I wasn't jamming it in there. Right. It just went in.

[Bob]

Other things found inside a woman. Two pencil sharpeners.

[Tom]

What? Oh, that is the crank.

[Bob]

Pencil sharpener.

[Tom]

What? Probably the handheld. Yeah. It can't be the ones you affix to the wall. That'd be hot. Oh, my God. Honey, we want to come over here and crank this for me. What do you think? I'd rather not, Aunt Linda. Now, remember, you can't tell your mom and dad. Got real dark.

[Bob]

A drinking cup.

[Tom]

Just say a cup. As opposed to an athletic cup.

[Bob]

I guess.

[Tom]

Was it like one of the souvenir cups that you get at the movies?

[Bob]

Was it like one of those that expands and goes down like this?

[Tom]

Yeah, the dune cup with a big worm coming out of it. I think a red, red solo.

[Bob]

A golf ball.

[Tom]

If you're gonna masturbate with something, it should be solo, right? A golf ball.

[Bob]

A golf ball. Better than a billiard ball, I'll tell you that.

[Tom]

I didn't play with a Titleist today. Hitting from the lady's. There was a joke there that I. Speaking of letters, I have to know.

[Bob]

A woman came in and said a flashlight was placed in her vagina by a patient at home. Oh, wait a minute. Flashlight was placed in the vagina by patient while she was at home, but had no intention of it becoming stuck.

[Tom]

Well, no.

[Bob]

You rarely do, right? Not usually.

[Tom]

In England, they call that a vagina torch. Absolutely. They have different words.

[Bob]

Some of these things I don't get. But a drumstick?

[Tom]

Well, what are we talking about? Probably not the food kind. Probably the kind you play the drums with. Either a turkey leg, an ice cream cone, or a.

[Bob]

What's a drumstick gonna do? It's like the size of a. I.

[Tom]

Thought drumsticks are actually huge. When you look at them, really girthy, really nice. I think a drumstick is real big.

[Bob]

A nail polish bottle.

[Tom]

Ah.

[Bob]

A camera lens cap.

[Tom]

That's weird. I left the lens on the camera lens cap.

[Bob]

Soap is popular. Unscented soap bar. Perfumed soap bar.

[Tom]

Wouldn't that sting?

[Bob]

Soap dispenser.

[Tom]

Well, if you have sting. If soap gets in there. If you have a lesion.

[Bob]

No, if you really, I just assume.

[Tom]

It'S soap up there. Smoke gets in your. Go ahead, Chris.

[Bob]

Spatula.

[Tom]

A pancake turner. Really?

[Bob]

And somehow a woman lost a screw and a coin in her vagina. I don't know how that is possible.

[Tom]

What is she using it as, a junk drawer? Phillips or flat? That's always the way you are. I can always find the one you don't need. This is a flathead.

[Bob]

All right, I'm gonna make you squirm now because this is gonna go inside your peen.

[Tom]

Oh. Oh, hey. Saving us for life. And what is this called, Josh? Sounding.

[Bob]

Sounding.

[Tom]

Putting stuff up there. Yeah.

[Bob]

Cell phone charger and 14 inch cord.

[Tom]

Oh.

[Bob]

Huh. Yeah.

[Tom]

I can't even put a lace through a pair of sweatpants, let alone a. For how long?

[Bob]

14 inch cord is what it says here.

[Tom]

Holy heck. Once the cord is in, I can see it going easily down. It's just the. Really? The charger. Well, how would you move it down into.

[Bob]

I don't know. Squeeze, I guess.

[Tom]

This is awful.

[Bob]

Cord's a popular one. We have a USB cord. We have the cell phone charger cord. We also have. This is the, quote, ceiling fan chain in his penis hole states. It has been there since his shower at 9 last night.

[Tom]

What I like to do, I call it. I call it the super shower. And I get in there, I get the chain from. See, ceiling fan. Boy, man, you might think this is weird. No, no, no. He had to climb up on a ladder. Yeah. Remove the fan, remove the chain. And for some reason, as he's doing this, I see him whistling. Yeah, yeah, sure. If I pull it once, it goes real fast. Twice, it goes twice as fast. Me up in the hole of your penis? Yeah. Boy, that's old school. I have a penis. Push button now, but Chick's got a remote in his phone. Oh, yeah, shove my phone in there. Thank you, Christy. Okay, what's happening?

[Bob]

And authorities in California are investigating reports of birds mysteriously, quote, unquote, exploding. Bay Area.

[Tom]

Is it because of Randy Johnson throwing pitches? If you haven't seen that, do yourself a favor, spend some time. It's an amazing video.

[Bob]

According To ABC News, residents of the Richmond neighborhood claim they have found multiple dead birds in the area. The California Department of fish and Wildlife's wildlife health lab said the bird's injuries were consistent with trauma from a pellet gun, BB gun, or a slingshot.

[Tom]

Somebody is out there. Just. Just kids.

[Bob]

It was initially believed the birds were being electrocuted on power lines.

[Tom]

They have slingshots that can cause some damage. They shoot these ball bears. Oh, I've seen it. Yeah. That's crazy. Hell, yeah. They're. They're deadly. Really good.

[Bob]

Oh, they are sad.

[Tom]

I think the suspect. The way to find this. Find someone who spent a lot of money at a car wash on a consistent basis. Oh, yeah. They have motive. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Bob]

They're done.

[Tom]

Like, hey, we got one of them right here. As I understand it, it's not the bird's fault. They can't control their bowels. They just go.

[Bob]

When was the last time you tried to potty train a bird?

[Tom]

That is interesting. You know those performance bells, those performance art guys that are living statues? Yes.

[Bob]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom]

How hard do they commit to the bit if a pigeon lands on them? Oh, man. Do they. Will they falter or let it cry? If you were to just sit next to one of those guys, would they ever leave? Do they ever have to pack up? Do they wait till no one's on the corner and then they can go hide, Take the makeup off. I've never seen one transition. I don't know. Yeah, I get Those really creep me out.

[Bob]

I Not surprised.

[Tom]

I'm not surprised by that. Yeah, the silver guy. Yeah. Because they're. Yeah, they can't break. They can't break a gold guy. I think. Do you think it's a rookie mistake to be a standing statue where eventually some old timer who does it for who's done it for 20 years goes, hey, you really want to find a bench? Get your knees. That's it for another Bob and Tom show. Extra. Catch us on itunes, Google play and stitcher. For Bob and Tom. Extra, this is Christopher. Take care, everybody. Jim Rome takes on sports. Why? Because you're not playing me with rapid fire. Takes and a lot to get to, and I'm not sure you're gonna like all of it. Honestly, I don't even care if you, like, love it or not. I have a job to do. Scorching debates on any given week, you have lots to beef about, take advantage of. But get up in here. He's the spitfire of sports smack. She's not my fault. We will get to all of that the Jim Rome show podcast. Get up in here and we'll beef later on. What's your beef? Follow and listen on your favorite platform. You've been warned.