The BOB & TOM Show - April 28, 2025

Summary

The BOB & TOM Show - April 28, 2025: Detailed Summary

The BOB & TOM Show delivered a vibrant mix of comedy, news, and sports on April 28, 2025. Hosted by Tom Griswold, Chick McGee, and Josh Arnold, the episode was filled with engaging discussions, humorous anecdotes, listener interactions, and insightful news segments. Below is a comprehensive summary capturing all key points, notable quotes, and conclusions from the episode.

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1. Welcome and Opening Banter ([04:19] - [05:30])

The episode commenced with the hosts rejoining the main show after brief interruptions from advertisements. The trio engaged in light-hearted conversation, setting a comedic tone for the episode.

Notable Quote:

• Tom Griswold: "This is my bowling night." ([02:38] - preceding content skips ads and non-content sections.)

2. Sperm Racing Segment ([05:50] - [06:18])

One of the standout stories was the introduction of the world's first live sperm race. This novel "sport" involved microscopic racetracks where sperm samples from competitors competed for the title.

Key Points:

• Participants: Tristan from USC won against Asher from UCLA.
• Setup: Samples were placed under microscopes with projections for the audience.
• Outcome: Tristan secured the victory, earning a golden sperm trophy.

Notable Quote:

• Tom Griswold: "It is the sperm race now, a latest sport you'll be getting to know a little bit about."

3. NFL Draft Discussions ([26:47] - [40:39])

A significant portion of the episode focused on the NFL Draft, highlighting notable picks and draft-day antics.

Key Points:

• Shador Sanders' Pick: Shador Sanders was selected by the Cleveland Browns in the fifth round.

• Prank Call Incident: Jeff Ulbricht, the defensive coordinator for the Atlanta Falcons, mistakenly made prank calls to Shador Sanders, thinking he was dialing other teammates. Sanders responded gracefully, questioning the prank's intent.

  Notable Quote:

  • Shador Sanders: "What are you going to do? Why do you get mad about it?" ([36:00])

• Cam Jurgen's Purchase Decision: Philadelphia Eagles center Cam Jurgen, after signing a $68 million contract extension, decided his first purchase would be TSA PreCheck, citing frequent flying and long lines as his motivations.

  Notable Quote:

  • Cam Jurgen: "I fly a lot. So I might look into this thing called TSA PreCheck. I'm kind of tired of waiting in lines." ([39:55])

4. Listener Letters and Song Requests ([19:54] - [29:31])

The hosts received and responded to various listener letters, which often inspired comedic songs and discussions.

Key Points:

• Shoe Dangle Tribute: A listener from Pensacola, Florida, wrote about the "shoe dangle" as a flirtatious gesture. This inspired Chick McGee to compose a humorous ballad titled "Come and Go."

  Notable Quote:

  • Chick McGee: "They cuffed his hands and stop the man from coming now he just can't come and go, hey." ([28:57])

• Autobahn Athletic Sperm Race Request: A letter linked the NFL Draft to the sperm race, prompting a creative segue into an associated song.

5. Embezzlement News ([152:16] - [153:33])

A segment covered a recent embezzlement case involving Heather Pankey, an employee at the First National Bank of Commerce in Arkansas.

Key Points:

• Incident Details: Pankey allegedly stole over $240,000 by accessing multiple customer accounts and transferring funds to a joint account with her grandmother.
• Charges: She faces financial identity fraud, theft of property, and forgery.

Notable Quote:

• Christy Lee: "She said, 'I borrowed money from a couple of customers, stating she thought they wouldn't miss.'" ([153:23])

6. Wildlife and Conservation Stories ([140:23] - [148:53])

The show delved into intriguing wildlife stories, emphasizing the challenges of invasive species and unusual animal behaviors.

Key Points:

• Snakehead Fish Vandalism:

  • Location: Seaside, Massachusetts.
  • Issue: A woodpecker causing damage to cars by breaking windshields and side mirrors.
  • Response: Authorities urge anglers to decapitate invasive snakehead fish to prevent ecological damage.

  Notable Quote:

  • Pat Godwin: "You've seen one of these things?" ([149:20])

• Loch Ness Underwater Whiskey Casks:

  • Company: Dam Hayen in Sterlingshire.
  • Innovation: Maturing whiskey casks 702 feet underwater in Loch Ness to enhance flavor profiles influenced by depth, pressure, and temperature.

  Notable Quote:

  • Christy Lee: "A group of starlings is called a murmuration." ([160:37])

7. Celebrity and Pop Culture Highlights ([46:05] - [74:27])

The hosts discussed various pop culture topics, including the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inductions and appearances of celebrities on shows like The Masked Singer.

Key Points:

• Rock and Roll Hall of Fame:

  • New Inductees: Chubby Checker, Joe Cocker, Bad Company, Cyndi Lauper, Outkast, The White Stripes, and Soundgarden.
  • Excluded Nominees: Mariah Carey, Billy Idol, Joy Division, Slash, New Order, and more.

  Notable Quote:

  • Tom Griswold: "Chubby Checker, I guess he had said he'd prefer getting in when he was alive." ([129:37])

• Edwin McCain on The Masked Singer:

  • Performance: Edwin McCain, known for hits like "I'll Be," participated and was praised for his vocal talent.

  Notable Quote:

  • Christy Lee: "He'll be... and his other great songs for you this summer." ([130:02])

8. Innovative Advertisements and Sponsorships ([15:10] - [160:55])

Throughout the episode, the show featured various sponsorship messages and advertisements, including promotions for Progressive Insurance, Peloton, Simplisafe, Silac Insurance Company, Java House, and Raycon Earbuds.

Notable Advertisements:

• Simplisafe Promotion: Highlighted AI-powered home security systems with live monitoring and no long-term contracts.

  Notable Quote:

  • Pat Godwin: "Visit simplisafetom.com and claim this deal of all deals." ([31:12])

• Silac Insurance: Discussed annuities as a steady retirement income solution.

  Notable Quote:

  • Tom Griswold: "Protect your retirement. Find out what annuities are all about by contacting the folks at the Silac Insurance Company." ([55:00])

9. Humorous Interactions and Comedy ([04:19] - [86:59])

The hosts engaged in continuous comedic banter, often poking fun at each other and sharing humorous takes on various topics.

Key Highlights:

• Sperm Race Comedy:

  • The joke extended to relationships between sperm races and interactions with audience members.

• Glasses and Flirting:

  • A playful discussion on how removing glasses can impact flirting dynamics.

  Notable Quote:

  • Chick McGee: "I know. Christy, I think this is for you. I." ([09:02])

• Kentucky Derby Horse Names:

  • Creative and humorous naming conventions for horses, such as "Thunderous Dump" and "Chunk of Gold."

  Notable Quote:

  • Chick McGee: "The ballado legend of the Ballad of..." ([28:57])

10. Closing Remarks and Upcoming Segments ([86:18] - [90:57])

As the episode neared its end, the hosts teased upcoming stories and segments, including embezzlement tales, Loch Ness monster sightings, and the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame announcements.

Notable Quote:

• Tom Griswold: "We have quite a few anglers in the room. Authorities are urging you anglers to decapitate any invasive snakehead fish you find." ([148:35])

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Conclusions and Takeaways

The April 28, 2025, episode of The BOB & TOM Show expertly balanced humor with informative segments, keeping listeners entertained while delivering news and engaging stories. Highlights included the innovative concept of sperm racing, in-depth coverage of the NFL Draft and its associated anecdotes, and humorous takes on wildlife challenges. The show's dynamic interaction with listener letters further enriched the content, making it both relatable and amusing.

Listeners can anticipate continuing this blend of comedy, news, and sports in future episodes, with the hosts maintaining their signature lively and humorous rapport.

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Note: This summary excludes all advertisements, intros, outros, and non-content sections as per the instructions.

Transcript

[Tom Griswold]

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[Chick McGee]

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[Tom Griswold]

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[Chick McGee]

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[Tom Griswold]

So.

[Chick McGee]

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[Tom Griswold]

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[Chick McGee]

Potential savings will vary. Not available in all states or situations.

[Tom Griswold]

This episode is brought to you by Peloton.

[Christy Lee]

Everyone has a reason to change.

[Tom Griswold]

Growing old, heartbreak, a fresh start. Whatever it may be, Peloton is here to get you through life's biggest moments. With instructors that speak your language and.

[Jess Hooker]

Workouts that move to your own rhythm.

[Tom Griswold]

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[Jess Hooker]

And get stronger, making your fitness goals a reality.

[Tom Griswold]

Find your push. Find your power. Peloton. Visit onepalaton.com.

[Josh Arnold]

It'S the Bob and Tom Show. Your house is a mess and you feel like you never have enough time to clean the way you'd like. Have you ever considered using a maid service?

[Chick McGee]

A maid service?

[Josh Arnold]

Frigamal Industries domestic service division is proud to announce the newest innovation in household health.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, hi. You must be the new maid.

[Christy Lee]

I sure am.

[Josh Arnold]

How great.

[Chick McGee]

Come on in.

[Christy Lee]

Oh my. This place is a mess.

[Chick McGee]

Well, yes, it's pretty bad. I live alone. I never have time to.

[Christy Lee]

You live alone? Yeah, yeah, a fine looking man like you, you should be married.

[Tom Griswold]

How old are you?

[Christy Lee]

26, 27.

[Josh Arnold]

It's a maid service unlike any other.

[Christy Lee]

Pick those underwear up off the floor.

[Josh Arnold]

What?

[Christy Lee]

You heard me. There is no excuse for this place looking like a pigsty.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, look, I hired you.

[Christy Lee]

And when you're finished with the bedroom, I want you to roll up your sleeves and get st on those dishes.

[Tom Griswold]

This is my bowling night.

[Christy Lee]

Well, I've got news for you, young man. You won't be going anywhere until this place is spic and spam.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, it's the maid service that guarantees your house will be cleaned to your liking because you'll actually be doing all the cleaning yourself.

[Christy Lee]

I'll get it.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, wait, that's my phone. Hello?

[Christy Lee]

No, I'm sorry. He's too busy cleaning to come to the phone right now.

[Chick McGee]

What the hell are you doing?

[Tom Griswold]

Answer my phone.

[Josh Arnold]

That's it.

[Christy Lee]

You're grounded.

[Chick McGee]

Grounded? Geez, she sounds just like my mom.

[Tom Griswold]

Exactly.

[Josh Arnold]

That's why we call our new maid service the just like your mom maid service, just like your mom maids know what's best for you. The sooner you learn that, the better off you'll be.

[Chick McGee]

Look, lady, I'm paying you $250 a week and all you're doing is nagging me until I clean up my apartment.

[Christy Lee]

Well, if you'd do what you're supposed to do around here, I wouldn't have to nag you.

[Josh Arnold]

Call just like your mom maids and see what a steadying influence and a firm hand can do for your housekeeping skills. And be sure to ask about our other services including just like your dad lawn care service and our very popular just like your mother in law travel trip planners.

[Tom Griswold]

Now turn left right there at that.

[Josh Arnold]

Pretty yellow house on the corner. Then right up there at that vacant.

[Christy Lee]

Lot with the lilac bushes.

[Josh Arnold]

Slow down, slow down.

[Christy Lee]

For heaven's sakes. You're going to get a speeding ticket.

[Josh Arnold]

Just like your mom made. Call us today while you still have your phone privileges. Hey. Hello. How are you?

[Tom Griswold]

How are ya?

[Josh Arnold]

It's the Bob and Tom show. Christy Lee at the Silac insurance news desk. Hello, there's Pat Godwin.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, Chick.

[Josh Arnold]

Hello, Josh Arnold.

[Pat Godwin]

Chick.

[Josh Arnold]

He rides again at the I hate Steven Singer sidekick chair. Feeling better?

[Pat Godwin]

I am on the mend. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Very nice. Sexy new voice.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, yeah, yeah, I had a pretty strong oh yeah. Old man river going in the shower.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, tell me more, you stud.

[Pat Godwin]

Old Man River.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, that's good.

[Josh Arnold]

That's beautiful.

[Pat Godwin]

Not too bad.

[Tom Griswold]

More soap in the bum, please.

[Josh Arnold]

We're in the O'Reilly.

[Pat Godwin]

You really have to do some trial and error with that because sometimes it stings. There are certain brands that really more caustic than others.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, you don't want to use lava on the old B hole.

[Pat Godwin]

Nothing with grit.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

The O'Reilly Auto Part Studios.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello.

[Josh Arnold]

How do you you equate singing to the the booty you always your favorite sports team?

[Tom Griswold]

No, he's in the shower.

[Josh Arnold]

If they win, fans start masturbating. I you the theories you have about.

[Pat Godwin]

People all by having at myself yesterday was since the blues won.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

And now we have a series two and two. Boy, it was oh yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Non stop. Right.

[Pat Godwin]

Well speaking of Kleenex for more than one reason.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, okay. I'm sorry. Speaking of which, we do have sperm in the news today. Oh, in sports. Believe it or not, kind of rarity.

[Pat Godwin]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean sperm in sports. We'll be getting to that. I'm certainly looking forward to that.

[Josh Arnold]

Your mic's off.

[Tom Griswold]

Is it famous athletic sperm no, it's the. We had the preview of this earlier. The sperm race.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, that's right.

[Tom Griswold]

It involves microscopes and projections and on screen.

[Pat Godwin]

When you say projections.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, sorry. Yeah, we'll. You'll find out. But that is the latest sport.

[Christy Lee]

I gave it to Chick.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, good.

[Josh Arnold]

The second dimension of this, right? This year.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, this time now, it's happened. The first was previewing the event. The event?

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, it was previewing.

[Tom Griswold]

The event has taken place. Much like your St. Louis Blues over the weekend, that event has taken place. We have.

[Josh Arnold]

Did you time your. Has it left the.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, thankfully, during hockey, they have the announcers, like many other sports, last minute of play. So I know that I can really.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Pat Godwin]

I really need to beat the band, as it were.

[Josh Arnold]

There you go.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, is this primarily a throat thing? What's happening over there?

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, sinuses, throat, stomach. I got nailed with something. I thought it was allergies last week.

[Josh Arnold]

Sounds real stuff.

[Pat Godwin]

And, yeah, it's been a. It's been a slow. This one's slow moving.

[Christy Lee]

Did you have a fever?

[Pat Godwin]

I did for a little bit and chills and then woke up and just the. The wettest sheets since my. Well, my 20s.

[Tom Griswold]

I thought you were gonna say. Never mind. So you. You got them wet?

[Pat Godwin]

Is the. Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, okay. Not. Not. Not.

[Josh Arnold]

So the. The wet sheet. Sounds like a sex move, doesn't it? Hey, welcome back.

[Tom Griswold]

Gave her the old wet sheets.

[Josh Arnold]

Give her the wet sheet.

[Pat Godwin]

It's not. Not all wuhan. I tested for that.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, good.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

So we're calling it the Wuhan flu now.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, I am. Yeah. Since it's been all. But it's been totally proven, actually, that it came from a lab from there that was partially funded by the US Government, which is insane.

[Christy Lee]

He's not wrong.

[Pat Godwin]

And also, alien technology.

[Josh Arnold]

Where are you on. Alien technology gave us cell phones. Where are you?

[Pat Godwin]

They did.

[Chick McGee]

Come on. Come on. Awful quick.

[Pat Godwin]

You know, and that. That old chaplain footage or whatever, that one silent film, I love that.

[Tom Griswold]

Where it looks like the guys walking by it. You see a horse and buggy and this guy walks by, appears to be in a cell phone.

[Pat Godwin]

That's really compelling.

[Josh Arnold]

I thought it was like a really old woman. I thought the video I saw, she's just walking along.

[Pat Godwin]

It's amazing.

[Josh Arnold]

Talking on her cell phone.

[Pat Godwin]

There may be a couple out there who knows what they're actually doing, but.

[Tom Griswold]

It sure looks like very, very, very funny. Let's see. We have also animal news today of interest. And, Pat, you have any songs for us today?

[Chick McGee]

I do. I Enjoy the music.

[Christy Lee]

He was making love with his guitar earlier.

[Chick McGee]

I. I told you that I used to sleep with my guitar when I first started playing.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I know.

[Chick McGee]

I would just go out and fall asleep with it.

[Pat Godwin]

It comfortably.

[Chick McGee]

I had nothing else in my life.

[Josh Arnold]

Not like. Not like now.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah. Now you primarily fall asleep with your organ.

[Chick McGee]

I got it going on. Here we go, baby.

[Josh Arnold]

Here we go again.

[Chick McGee]

This is the best time of my life hanging out with you guys. I'm not even joking.

[Josh Arnold]

It's a wonder that you don't play with yourself while you're playing guitar.

[Chick McGee]

I know.

[Christy Lee]

Please don't have enough hands.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, you'd find a way. A guy would find a way.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, I know. Christy, I think this is for you. I. I'm not. Who brought up the shoe dangle?

[Christy Lee]

You guys did.

[Chick McGee]

Josh, didn't you?

[Pat Godwin]

I. I know. I came back after, like, a fishing trip, and you guys said you were discussing it.

[Josh Arnold]

We were talking about shoot angle. That's right.

[Tom Griswold]

This is the thing that the ladies.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, yeah, You. You explain it. The one that knows the least about it.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, I'm. I'm talking to my fellow people that aren't aware what the shoot angle is. Okay, but. So you have some lady, she's got her legs crossed. She's wearing some sort of a skirt or dress.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, not necessarily.

[Tom Griswold]

Parts of her legs are exposed, which is the best part of that movie, Amish Heat. And then she's kind of got her shoe half off, dangling it.

[Christy Lee]

She's kicking her leg.

[Tom Griswold]

This apparently, is a. A provocative invitation. Invitation for the man to a come hither move.

[Chick McGee]

Relax.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't care what her name is, but you can come hither or. Heather. This is a letter from Jack. He goes on a drive about listening to your show a couple of weeks ago, talking about shoe dangling. Equal or better than that. Is lip playing a woman absentmindedly playing with a pen or pencil.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah, that is good.

[Tom Griswold]

Or eyeglasses. Flame. Excuse me? Eyeglass frames in her lips.

[Christy Lee]

Really?

[Tom Griswold]

Including penetration of the lips.

[Josh Arnold]

We've got a.

[Chick McGee]

What are we.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, this is from Jack in Pensacola, Florida.

[Josh Arnold]

I bet it is. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

So if the lady picks up her glasses and then puts them in her mouth and then starts like some inserting them.

[Pat Godwin]

A hot 1950s scientist lady.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah, yeah. That's. That's a great look. A great move with the hair in a bun. They pull it out, shake their head, pop the glasses off.

[Pat Godwin]

Sharon Clueless taught us that. Anything to draw attention to your mouth. That's what she says. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Who's this?

[Christy Lee]

They're redoing Clueless. She's gonna bring it back. Oh, I think I just read.

[Josh Arnold]

Is she gonna be Grandma Clueless?

[Christy Lee]

I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, we have an odd, odd way to get to a Pat Godwin request here. Oh, this is how observant many of our listeners are. Michael has written that. Well, I'll tell you what. It's. It involves the NFL draft and a pick by the Cincinnati Bengals. And we. When we come back, we'll explain how this is going to lead us to a Pat Godo and so on. It is quite a stretch.

[Christy Lee]

Did that Sanders kid ever get it picked?

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, he did.

[Tom Griswold]

By the Cleveland Browns.

[Josh Arnold]

The Cleveland Browns?

[Christy Lee]

Really?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Fifth round. Fifth round. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

They now have a. A flock of quarterbacks.

[Christy Lee]

Is that the kid that's in the Gatorade commercial? I don't know much about this.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know about the Gatorade.

[Christy Lee]

Okay, there's a Gatorade commercial, I think.

[Josh Arnold]

We don't watch commercials at my house. Sorry.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, you don't pass forward, huh?

[Tom Griswold]

We'll find out about the NFL draft. And we have, I think, something leading to a song involving the NFL draft. As I said, we also have something for you, Christy, about involving woodpeckers.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, my gosh. I bought two bird feeders and a double shepherd's hook over the weekend.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, boy.

[Josh Arnold]

A double what?

[Christy Lee]

Shepherd's hook.

[Pat Godwin]

The thing you can hang.

[Josh Arnold]

You've seen the video where the squirrel has his testicles caught in the shepherd's hook and he's hanging. He's hanging by his balls.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, that poor guy.

[Christy Lee]

No, I don't want that.

[Josh Arnold]

It was so hot. I mean, probably I did buy one.

[Christy Lee]

Squirrel proof feeder and the other one I think they can get in, but it was cute, so I had to have it.

[Tom Griswold]

And we have. We have a special fish story for Josh.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh.

[Tom Griswold]

Involving an invasive critter that the various DNRs want you to decapitate.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, yikes.

[Tom Griswold]

Catch him and kill him. Not catching a release. We'll find out about that right now. I'm reminding you Mother's Day, Christy, that.

[Christy Lee]

Date on May 11th.

[Tom Griswold]

May 11th. Let's see now. Ooh, yikes. Just a couple of weeks away. This is why, gentlemen, it's time to act. And the best way to take care of Mother's Day, of course, involves our friend Stephen Singer at Steven Singer Jewelers. And you'll find the entire catalog at I hate stevensinger.com. suggested items would include the limited edition Blue Moon 24 Karat Gold Dipped Rose. That's right. The rose is an actual real rose dipped in 24 karat gold. Makes the perfect Mother's Day gift. By the way, it's called the blue moon rose this season. And Stephen Singer was on the phone with us a couple weeks ago saying this is not going to be redone. So this is a limited run and last year at this time they were running out. So it's guaranteed to last a lifetime. Of course, comes in an impressive gift box with a personalized Mother's Day card from you and of course, free shipping. You'll find it all atIHATE stevensinger.com. once again, these will not be restocked. I would recommend getting this done today. Now, if the mother in question happens to be your sweetie, I would also recommend that at Last bracelet. That is one beautiful diamond bracelet and quite a value. And of course, it's real diamonds.

[Christy Lee]

Not a bang for your buck.

[Tom Griswold]

None of the fake stuff and maybe.

[Josh Arnold]

A bang for your buck.

[Christy Lee]

There you go.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, a little something for the effort.

[Josh Arnold]

That's right.

[Tom Griswold]

As Bill Murray maybe so carefully notes.

[Josh Arnold]

She'Ll play with her pencil in her lips for you.

[Tom Griswold]

Precisely. Yeah, I gave her the old number two pencil.

[Josh Arnold]

Christy mentions a twirling.

[Chick McGee]

I like that.

[Josh Arnold]

Twirling the hair.

[Tom Griswold]

Ever give anybody the number two pencil? No, I haven't ever had the number two.

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

I thought you did. You were telling us about something.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, back to the tiny back to the beautiful rose. There's one right over there. It's the blue moon from Stephen Singer. Check it out. I hate Stephen Singer. Coming up, we have NFL news, a song from Patty G. And of course, naked people in public. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Josh Arnold]

What if I told you there was.

[Tom Griswold]

A way to help crack the case.

[Josh Arnold]

Of the slugging metabolism and the disappearing results? The answer might surprise you. Every fitness journey has its unsolved mysteries. The case of the vanishing progress. The enigma of persistent cravings. The curious incident of willpower that vanishes without a trace.

[Pat Godwin]

But there's a new breakthrough in the investigation. Smoothie King's Dark Chocolate Banana Metabolism Boost. A smoothie crafted to be your partner in helping to crack these fitness cold cases. With 23 grams of protein and 12 grams of fiber, it's designed to help.

[Josh Arnold]

Keep you fuller, longer and to help boost your metabolism.

[Pat Godwin]

No more mysterious disappearances of your hard earned results. Zero grams of added sugar and naturally derived caffeine work together to help rev up your metabolism. And at just 320 calories. It's the perfect meal replacement for anyone trying to close the case on their weight management goals.

[Josh Arnold]

Don't let another fitness mystery go unsolved. Head to your local Smoothie King to.

[Pat Godwin]

Try the Dark Chocolate Banana Metabolism Boost. Also available in strawberry, pineapple and mango ginger. Life is a workout.

[Josh Arnold]

Make it a good one with Smoothie King.

[Pat Godwin]

Individual results will vary. These statements and products have not been evaluated by the fda.

[Josh Arnold]

These products are not intended to diagnose.

[Pat Godwin]

Treat, cure or prevent any disease or condition.

[Josh Arnold]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. If you haven't been sternly talking, talked to by your mother or maybe your sibling, Tom will take care of that later this morning when he'll. Hey, listen to me. You listen to me right now.

[Tom Griswold]

Sometimes people need a good talking, too. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

You think or we do?

[Tom Griswold]

I've been practicing with my dogs.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, have they been bad?

[Tom Griswold]

One of them thinks I. I can't see him with the eyes in back of my head, but I see him.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, I don't know how.

[Tom Griswold]

He has a little perch that he like a little right thing he's supposed to be sitting on in my office.

[Josh Arnold]

You have a bed down. You should put it back down.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, it is okay. It's like he. I like to have the. One of them sits there, the other one sits the other side of the room. Then I'll be busy. All of a sudden they'll be tangling and jumping around and.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, you gotta let him know.

[Tom Griswold]

I just go.

[Pat Godwin]

Place.

[Tom Griswold]

Yep, you say the word place.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, place. They go to their place.

[Tom Griswold]

He knows his place. And I like more people to know their place in general.

[Josh Arnold]

Easy, easy, easy, buckaroo. So I don't know how much longer I have to live. I think we all could say that. But like yesterday, I'm sitting there enjoying myself watching the NBA playoffs. Man, that is a different game in the playoffs. Have you noticed this? Yes, they really do. They let them play and they go after it. So my Australian shepherd, Joey, short for Josephine, she comes over and she's sitting by my chair looking at me and this. Normally she wants a peanut butter nugget or whatever. So I, I look it down at her and she takes her paw and puts it right on my hand.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I go, what the hell's going on here?

[Josh Arnold]

Because you hear about those dogs and those cats that hang out at the old folks home.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

They put.

[Josh Arnold]

It's like almost. She put my. Put her paw in my hand and go get ready.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, Trickster, it's time.

[Josh Arnold]

Get your affairs in order.

[Chick McGee]

You're gonna miss you.

[Christy Lee]

Is that the first time she's ever done.

[Josh Arnold]

The first time she's ever done it.

[Christy Lee]

Whoa.

[Pat Godwin]

Bless you, man. A dog shows you a little affection and you see it as an omen of death.

[Tom Griswold]

Do you remember the precise time?

[Josh Arnold]

It was like 2:30, 3:00 in the afternoon.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, precisely.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, it was after 12pm yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Is that bad? Is that real bad?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, it's always.

[Pat Godwin]

You didn't mention that.

[Josh Arnold]

What have you heard?

[Tom Griswold]

Nothing. Not that you're gonna die in the afternoon on a Sunday.

[Christy Lee]

Did you have a big spot, a big burst of energy yesterday? Do anything out of the north?

[Josh Arnold]

We were out in the yard a lot yesterday. It was real nice. Chuckle boy.

[Tom Griswold]

It was, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Threw the ball. We played baseball in the backyard.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, good.

[Christy Lee]

No, we have throw a baseball at your dogs.

[Pat Godwin]

They don't behave if he doesn't get hit every now and again.

[Josh Arnold]

That's right. You gotta have your head on a swivel.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

No tennis balls.

[Christy Lee]

Of course.

[Tom Griswold]

We have a song coming up from Pat in just a second based on this. This request.

[Josh Arnold]

Have the story or do you want to do letters?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, I just want to do one quick letter.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

This comes to us from ajw. AJW from San Diego, California. Thank you very much. She's kind enough to write. I've been listening to you guys read all those old folksy sayings from uncles and grandfathers and fathers. I couldn't think of anything. Suddenly I remembered what one of my uncles used to say. On a really hot day, it's hotter than a June bride in a feather bed.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, I'm with you, chick.

[Josh Arnold]

I am.

[Chick McGee]

I'm glad that was June.

[Josh Arnold]

I thought that was gonna go real wrong.

[Pat Godwin]

We've all heard those other ones. In fact, I think this person's uncle may have cleaned things up a little bit.

[Josh Arnold]

It might have been a June bride. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

How about.

[Pat Godwin]

Whoa.

[Tom Griswold]

How about it's hotter than two rats banging it out in a wool sock.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay, I've heard. I have heard that one.

[Chick McGee]

I've never heard. I like that.

[Christy Lee]

I've never heard that one.

[Tom Griswold]

I haven't heard that one. I just love these. These are so good. On a fun note, a good friend of the show, Edwin McCain, was featured last week on the Masked Singer. We talked with Edwin. Got a nice letter here from Scott, who said, I have been to concerts, seeing. I've seen Paul McCartney, Elton John, James Taylor, Def Leppard, Aerosmith, Jimmy Vaughn. But Edwin McCain was the most entertaining and vocally gifted singer I've ever experienced.

[Christy Lee]

Whoa. That's very cool. Nice letter.

[Tom Griswold]

He's great.

[Pat Godwin]

Did you. When you spoke to. Yeah. I imagine you spoke to him last week about it.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, we spoke to him.

[Pat Godwin]

Did he happen to mention that I. Because I have a feeling he's been in here since he filmed that.

[Christy Lee]

He has been.

[Pat Godwin]

So he had just keep his mouth shut?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, yeah, absolutely. Has he said there's quite an extensive process when you're on the show. Like, didn't they put a hood over his head?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but he said.

[Josh Arnold]

Or at least Munich.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. He said that his hair was really clean from the waterboarding. They're very serious.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. He said he had to keep the secret for quite a while.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. The only one on his family he knew, I guess, was his daughter's daughter.

[Pat Godwin]

He just couldn't keep it from them.

[Chick McGee]

Right?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, have you seen his daughter? She's on his Instagram. She looks exactly like Edwin did when he first started singing.

[Tom Griswold]

Without this. Without the soul.

[Josh Arnold]

You know what? I'm trying.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Sorry. Sorry.

[Josh Arnold]

Without the penis, too.

[Tom Griswold]

Before we get the. Before we get to the.

[Christy Lee]

His prom this weekend.

[Tom Griswold]

Been more subtle. This comes to us from Bud. Hey, bud in Oakdale, let's party. I'm not sure where Oakdale is. Anyone know?

[Pat Godwin]

Just south of.

[Josh Arnold]

Elm, Smithfield and Oakdale. The Tri Cities.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Nosfer. Too.

[Christy Lee]

Oakdale. Is it Oakdale?

[Josh Arnold]

Have you been to Vampire Days?

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

He goes. When I was 11 years old, I launched a model rocket in my bathroom.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, whoops.

[Josh Arnold]

It sounds like you guys would have been friends.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Didn't you tape a. Imaginary tape, a commercial in front of your bathroom mirror with a light bulb and a Kleenex?

[Tom Griswold]

It was. I was. I was pitching a commercial pretending I was on tv looking in the mirror. And it was about the new Kleenex drying system. And I took a Kleenex and put it over the lamp.

[Josh Arnold]

And what happened?

[Tom Griswold]

The entire house went dark. Yeah, well, those were. Those were primitive days.

[Christy Lee]

Did your dad say something like circuits?

[Josh Arnold]

Damn it, Tom. Oh, back then.

[Tom Griswold]

And you had the little screw in fuses down in the fuse box.

[Josh Arnold]

You ever do a short system like my dad did? Like put a penny in there or something? You wouldn't have to worry about buying fuses.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, not a good idea.

[Josh Arnold]

Every now and again, we're incredibly dangerous.

[Pat Godwin]

We've heard about the bullet being used as a fuse.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah?

[Pat Godwin]

Really? You guys had a story, decade, literally, decades ago, about a guy who put a bullet in the fuse just by his feet in the car. You know how those fuses used to be down there? I don't know if they. And blew one of his testicles off.

[Tom Griswold]

I've got to find that story. Give me just a second.

[Josh Arnold]

I have. Totally.

[Pat Godwin]

That kept me from going into work. I stayed in my car to hear more about.

[Tom Griswold]

If you're just joining us. Hello. Thank you so much for joining us. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom show. And I've got one more quick one. We were talking about a guy from Oakdale. Bud says, I shot off a model rocket in my bathroom as a kid. I got in trouble.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

My cool uncle said, hey, look, son, don't sweat the petty stuff, just pet the sweaty stuff.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Honestly, I didn't understand it for a few years, but I kept saying it all the time. Sounds like a Kennedy always getting a laugh. Anyway, I understand now. Thanks for the good times and making my commute tolerable.

[Christy Lee]

That's a whole nother topic where you would say sayings that you thought they were nothing until you got older and you went, oh, like you're not just saying, like, horn blows.

[Tom Griswold]

You know that the horn blows and so do you know.

[Christy Lee]

How about the driver?

[Josh Arnold]

How about the driver?

[Christy Lee]

I didn't know what that meant. I just thought it was some giggly, funny thing.

[Josh Arnold]

Horn blows. How about the driver? You've never heard that.

[Christy Lee]

You've never heard.

[Tom Griswold]

My version was the horn blows and so do you.

[Pat Godwin]

They both work.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, well, similar.

[Tom Griswold]

One's more economical than the other. Don't sweat the petty stuff. Just pet the sweaty stuff. I get. That's, that's lovely. Nice, hot, sweaty. I'm sure of a certain age I have a story.

[Christy Lee]

I mean a letter.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Christy Lee]

This is from Brad. Dear radio people, this is not the.

[Pat Godwin]

Best breakfast I've ever had. Brad.

[Christy Lee]

Last time's Ridgemont High, listening to Thursday's show on Saturday. And during the news story about the guy getting the ball stuck in his backside, remember that there was like a 3 inch ball stuck in his.

[Tom Griswold]

It was an electronic children's toy that lit up with.

[Pat Godwin]

With every bounce, I believe.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, anything that lights up should be outlawed.

[Christy Lee]

Christy said, And I quote, 3 inches is pretty good size. Men everywhere rejoiced. I'm surprised nobody caught it. Thanks, Brad. The trucker, just trucking around. Thank you, Brad.

[Chick McGee]

Trucking around, Brad?

[Tom Griswold]

Yep. Yeah, the poor guy.

[Christy Lee]

No, poor guy. It's what he gets for sticking stuff up his back.

[Josh Arnold]

Didn't he say he fell on it? It was a total accident.

[Chick McGee]

It always is.

[Josh Arnold]

Million to one shot.

[Tom Griswold]

You just wake up and be glad that you're not, you know, you don't wake up and go, well, today I'm gonna cram something in there.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I know.

[Tom Griswold]

Electronic.

[Josh Arnold]

You just played that one.

[Chick McGee]

That's my favorite reggae joke.

[Christy Lee]

That takes in a whole new meaning to that song.

[Chick McGee]

It does now.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Yeah. I guess I wonder if there's a problem for the. If the. If it had been in there for a while with the batteries of poisoned.

[Christy Lee]

The guy, I don't think it had been a good thing.

[Tom Griswold]

Leakage.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, I brothers leakage now.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah, yeah. It's time now to check in with Chick McGee. Only to introduce a song from Pat Godwin.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, that's what we said we were going to do, right? Okay. The Bengals, well, all the NFL teams drafted over the weekend. And number one, of course, as expected, Cam Ward to the Titans and Shador Sanders finally in the fifth round to the Browns. And just one of the many stories yesterday we were alerted to by a loyal listener. The Cincinnati Bengals took Dylan Fairchild. He's 6 foot 5, 318 pound offensive guard from Georgia. But not just any city in Georgia. I believe Pat has a song about this.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, the coming Georgia. Remember that, Tom?

[Tom Griswold]

Now coming Georgia is. And it's spelled C U M. Yeah, M I N G. Coming Georgia was in the news and I'm quoting here from the Forsyth Herald, a man from Cumming, Georgia was arrested for trespassing naked through a neighbor's backyard. Once again reporting from the Forsyth Herald, a resident reported seeing the naked man on their security camera. The man allegedly then committed a lewd act on the victim's front porch before leaving. The complainant added that they had footage from prior months of the man walking nude through their backyard. The man eventually turned himself into authorities 51 years of age, charged with public indecency and criminal trespass. Now the nature of the lewd act I'll leave leave it to your imagination. Coming for you now, Pat, you have a tribute.

[Chick McGee]

I do indeed. There's a man from a town called Cumming he's walking in your backyard nude Try and stop the man from coming he's gonna do something lewd he came on your porch and left a present they got it on video Caught in the act the coming man now off to jail he goes they finally stop the man from coming he put on quite a show they cuffed his his hands and stop the man from coming now he just can't come and go hey.

[Pat Godwin]

The ballado legend of the Ballad of.

[Chick McGee]

The man from Style of.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm trying to remember is Come and Go, the convenience store that's going to change its name.

[Christy Lee]

Yep, they are. That is correct.

[Pat Godwin]

And they're K U M. K U.

[Christy Lee]

M N G. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Someone sent me a letter this morning, said there was another one out there called an accompanying picture. I don't know, I'm just saying it might be real, might not. It's called Chat and Scat.

[Pat Godwin]

What's that about?

[Josh Arnold]

Well, like, you chat and then you leave. You scat.

[Pat Godwin]

Right, right. But it's always. It's a convenience store too, however.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, it's a convenience store.

[Pat Godwin]

It's not a bad name.

[Josh Arnold]

Chat and Scat.

[Pat Godwin]

Or you could be using the restroom.

[Josh Arnold]

Exactly.

[Tom Griswold]

Or you could be singing like Josh. But he's got a Ziploc.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, he's learning. He's been taking lessons.

[Josh Arnold]

Nice, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Here we go. Come and Go stations are in the process of rebranding. The company is called Maverick. M A V E R I K.

[Pat Godwin]

Not a bad name for a convenience store in and of itself.

[Tom Griswold]

Going down to The Maverick Smoke, 41 stores in Oklahoma are currently in the middle of changing the name from Come and Go to Maverick. During this changeover, stores will experience a brief closure for rebranding stores.

[Pat Godwin]

Latency period.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, very good stores. Other states are also changing the name. It will no longer be Come and Go. Oh, by the way, they're famous for their slushies.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, boy. Is that right?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, they're changing the name of it.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, Jizzles.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, that's weird. They get away from one and they seem like they backed right into the other. Huh.

[Tom Griswold]

That reminds me. What if they sell at BJ's wholesale club?

[Pat Godwin]

Well, holes in BJ's, you know, not what you expect. That was a long, long argument with a manager.

[Tom Griswold]

False advertising. I'm calling the BBB right now. It's time to talk about keeping your place safe and secure in case there's a naked guy in your backyard. You want to be careful.

[Josh Arnold]

Simplisafe. The do it yourself home security system. And we trust it here at the Bob and Tom studios. We've got the camera and the security system is Simplisafe. Millions of Americans enjoy the new standard in home security. Greater peace of mind every time they arm their system. Traditional security systems only take action after somebody's already broken in. And that is too late. Simplisafe has change the game. It's called Active Guard Outdoor protection. It helps prevent break ins before they happen. AI powered cameras backed by live professional monitoring agents. If someone's lurking around or acting suspiciously outside your compound, agents can see and talk to them in real time, turn on spotlights and even call the police, all before that guy or girl or that burglar has a chance to get inside your home and touch your stuff. No long term contracts or cancellation fees. Monitoring plans start affordably at around a dollar a day, 60 day satisfaction guarantee or your money back. So visit simplisafetom.com right now to claim this deal of all deals. 50% off a new system with a professional monitoring plan and get your first month free. That's simplisafetom.com 50% off, first month free. Simplisafetom.com there's no safe like simplisafe.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much, Chick. Once again, coming up, we'll have a little bit of a review of what's happened in the NFL. Also, a great story about one of the one of the guys that's already in the NFL that got a great contract of what he's going to do with all that money. And then, Josh, we have the Loch Ness Monster in the news today.

[Pat Godwin]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

It's very, very compelling. These are the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios and this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey, thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom show this morning. Get a look today's show on our YouTube channel.

[Tom Griswold]

This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Fiscally responsible financial geniuses, monetary magicians.

[Josh Arnold]

These are things people say about drivers.

[Tom Griswold]

Who switch their car insurance to Progressive and save hundreds because Progressive offers discounts.

[Chick McGee]

For paying in full, owning a home and more.

[Tom Griswold]

Plus, you can count on their great customer service to help you when you need it.

[Chick McGee]

So your dollar goes a long way.

[Tom Griswold]

Visit progressive.com to see if you could save on car insurance, Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates.

[Chick McGee]

Potential savings will vary. Not available in all states or situations.

[Tom Griswold]

95.

[Josh Arnold]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. Christy Lee, Pat Godwin. Hello, Josh Arnold Hi, chick. I'm Chick McGee. Hello, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello, Chick.

[Josh Arnold]

How are you, bud?

[Tom Griswold]

I've gone down the down the wormhole.

[Christy Lee]

And that is, well, we were talking.

[Tom Griswold]

About the come and go convenience store chain. Yes, we've had a couple of really interesting convenience store stories lately. Last week we had a pretty good one. Here's one. Kenosha, Wisconsin.

[Christy Lee]

Huh?

[Tom Griswold]

Police arrested a man for masturbating inside a Piggly Wiggly grocery store.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, sir, love the Piggly Wiggly.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. I won't go into any details, but they did have to have a cleanup if you Will, should they go into enough detail, you realize there was a fluid. I'm hoping this guy's. The suspect's name is Jack, but I don't. I don't see that. But that led me to this really exciting story out of Louisiana at Gulfport. Great spot. Have you ever been to a Sonic restaurant? Of course.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Heck yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

There's a sign at the Gulfport location of Sonic in Louisiana asking patrons to please stop smoking marijuana in the drive through.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, stop being a Sonic.

[Christy Lee]

That's why you go to Sonic.

[Chick McGee]

Only one reason to go to a Sonic.

[Tom Griswold]

The store manager, Yasmin Freeman, said they posted the sign after a person blew smoke in the face of an employee.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, well, you don't want to do that.

[Tom Griswold]

It says, attention, if you're smoking weed in the drive through, you will not be served. Please show some common courtesy and smoke and air out before pulling into order. So they're essentially acknowledging.

[Josh Arnold]

You harshed my buzz, man.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. So unless you want. What do they have?

[Pat Godwin]

Cheeseburgers, tots, Coney dogs and a court date.

[Tom Griswold]

Be careful at Sonic. Now it's time to check in with the sporting scene and check McGee.

[Josh Arnold]

The Atlanta Falcons defensive coordinator Jeff Ulbricht, his son, is responsible for that prank call that they made to NFL draft pick Shador Sanders. The Falcons released a statement saying 21 year old Jax Ulbricht unintentionally found Sanders phone number on an open iPad, belonged to his dad while he was visiting his parents home and made the prank call. He has since made an apology to Shador and the Sanders family. And apparently there were a bunch of numbers on the iPad and the rumor is he called a bunch of other players and tried to prank them and do.

[Tom Griswold]

So did he say you've been drafted by the Falcons?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Or like no, by Chiefs, I think. Or he threw up a whole bunch of. Total punk. Yeah, but Shador had a nice response. He goes, I what. What are you going to do? Why. Why do you get mad about it? So we'll see. We'll see.

[Tom Griswold]

How old was the kid?

[Josh Arnold]

21.

[Tom Griswold]

Old enough to know better.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, he is.

[Josh Arnold]

Would you give him time out? Tom? You don't think it's a fun prank? I know how you like practical jokes.

[Tom Griswold]

I hate practical jokes.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, but you. When do you hate practical jokes? Because you love watching them happen, don't you?

[Tom Griswold]

Not really. Not really a fan.

[Josh Arnold]

What about that long involved one? The guy was in the hospital and they made him believe he loved that.

[Chick McGee]

Good one.

[Tom Griswold]

That was. That was great because that. That had a Moral structure to it. They were. The guy had been a. Had been passing out from getting drunk so much, and his. And Tom, maybe the comedian. When the guy woke up, he thought he was in a hospital. And Tom made. They had a video. The whole thing scared him straight, saying the guy had been in a coma for five years. Yeah, that is a joke. That's a. That's a life lesson. Yeah, but this kid's just being a.

[Josh Arnold]

Sounds like a practical joke to me.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, well, I guess that's the practical part of a practical joke. So we do have more news from the NFL draft. Of course. Did your team do okay?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, they. They did fine. You guys don't want to hear about that. But I'm trying to figure out what story you're trying to lead me to, so why don't you just tell me which one you want.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, I thought the Sanders story was very interesting.

[Josh Arnold]

He was drafted by the Browns in the fifth round, 144th pick. The team's quarterback. Room now. DeSean Watson, Kenny Pickett, Joe Flacco, Dylan Gabriel and Shador Sanders.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, is Shador spelled the usual way?

[Christy Lee]

What's the usual way?

[Pat Godwin]

I think that's the joke.

[Christy Lee]

Shador. I don't even know how to spell. I wouldn't even know how to try to spell.

[Tom Griswold]

Not throwing any shade on Shidor, but unusual.

[Josh Arnold]

I think you are.

[Pat Godwin]

You think anybody after a big meal has asked if Shidor is full.

[Tom Griswold]

Is this. It's a quote from the movie.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. That makes it okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Christmas.

[Josh Arnold]

I mean, that makes it all right.

[Pat Godwin]

Saying the guy's name as correctly as I could.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Why wouldn't you? Let's see. New York, the Knicks, Minnesota, Boston, Indiana, they all win yesterday in the NBA and they have a three game to one lead. That's all of the nuts and bolts sports I'm allowed to relay to you because of Tom Griswold. Also, NHL playoffs, St. Louis and Winnipeg Blues tie that series at two games apiece. They win yesterday 5 to 1. Carolina and Washington have three game to one lead in their series. Edmonton, Los Angeles, all tied up at two apiece. And this is the story that Tom's excited about, about Philadelphia Eagles. He signed a big contract and you know how he likes to ask people, what did you buy when you first got rich? Yada yada.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Aren't you excited about this, Tom?

[Tom Griswold]

I think it's a great story.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay. Okay. Philadelphia Eagle center Cam Juergens has revealed. Revealed that he tends to splurge on after signing a 68 million dollar contract extension. He said this first purchase with the new contract will be TSA PreCheck.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, all right.

[Christy Lee]

That's $89.

[Chick McGee]

He's a frugal man.

[Josh Arnold]

He said I fly, like, a lot. I fly a lot. So I might look into this thing called TSA PreCheck. I'm kind of tired of waiting in lines.

[Pat Godwin]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

I think I can afford that. I'm going to look into TSA PreCheck next and see if I can get that done.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Fun. I think it was a. Fun. It seems like a really. He seems like a really funny guy instead of. Instead of the usual bling and Right. You know, practical. It wasn't Chador wearing like a. Wasn't he wearing, like a giant gold. Oh, chain thing?

[Chick McGee]

Can't get through security with that off.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I would not have spelled Shador correctly. I had to look that up.

[Chick McGee]

How's it spelled?

[Christy Lee]

S, H, E. Oh, D, E, U, R. Oh, right. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

See, there's no I in that name.

[Pat Godwin]

Sure isn't.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, the other story that I saw on the television with the cam, Jurgen said he was going to do Pete the pre check, which is like you say, it's like 85 bucks or something.

[Pat Godwin]

You guys ever experienced this? Happened to me twice in my life. The regulars line shorter than the pre check, and I got through faster than the pre check people.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but you had to keep your shoes. Take your shoes off, didn't you?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, but I got through faster.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but I hate that.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, it's getting worse.

[Chick McGee]

Yes, I suppose I'd like to make.

[Pat Godwin]

A reach a certain age. The shoes part will be the bigger issue for me right now.

[Chick McGee]

He can reach his feet.

[Tom Griswold]

Not much of a hassle. I like to have a competition who can reach their feet in a more delicate manner, me or him?

[Pat Godwin]

I just want to get through the unlawful search and seizure as quickly as possible, because that's what it is and everybody should know.

[Tom Griswold]

I'd like to make a suggestion for TSA.

[Chick McGee]

What are you trying to hide?

[Josh Arnold]

You were watching TV on 9 11, right?

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, baby.

[Tom Griswold]

They should have hand sanitizer on the other end of TSA PreCheck because you've just had to reach down and tie your shoes that are filthy and full of germ.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, my God, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

No, you reach down, tie your shoes that have been. I mean, I can only imagine the filth in your apartment.

[Pat Godwin]

I bet some have it. I don't know. I mean, they could get plenty that they steal out of suitcases for being one and a Half ounces old.

[Chick McGee]

Survive. You have to become immune to them.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, fine. You go wipe your hands of the. The floor of the airport, eat a few hot dogs, and I'll come to your.

[Chick McGee]

You need to live in a bubble.

[Tom Griswold]

All right, you want an open casket or not?

[Josh Arnold]

He wants to come up with an idea that everyone. It's universally acclaimed.

[Tom Griswold]

I come up with many like, that's.

[Josh Arnold]

The greatest idea in the history of the world. At last. They put sanitary wipes at the end of the tsa.

[Tom Griswold]

Preach.

[Josh Arnold]

Tom Griswold.

[Tom Griswold]

Just a pump thing. They have it. You walk into Target and they've got one. For God's sake. They're. They're. They're. They want their clientele to stay alive. You say. They say 67% of people got Covid. Got it from going through TSA. I'm just saying.

[Josh Arnold]

67%. Let me tell you something. And I think it's higher. 73.

[Christy Lee]

The other guy proved that you didn't get Covid from washing your earth from touching things.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, sorry.

[Pat Godwin]

It did kind of come from a plane.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, it did.

[Pat Godwin]

At least here.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, the other guy, by the way, they interviewed who? What did he do when he got a big NFL contract? He bought one of those lawnmowers you can turn with.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay, see? See, that's a story. A zero turn radius lawnmower.

[Tom Griswold]

How cool are those?

[Josh Arnold]

Those are great.

[Pat Godwin]

Those are fun.

[Tom Griswold]

I always think. I always think I'm going to kill. There's one guy that's always cutting his grass with one of those things. He's flying toward the road. Stop.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And he does that quick turn.

[Josh Arnold]

TSA PreCheck purchase is.

[Tom Griswold]

He was having fun. It was cool.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, but why do you have to force it on us if he was.

[Tom Griswold]

Having fun, was he joking?

[Josh Arnold]

Who knows? He's been hitting the head a lot. Who knows?

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Pat Godwin]

You guys all have it, don't you?

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

I do not. Oh, yeah, I did, but I've been away from it.

[Tom Griswold]

What would you say, Pat, if you. This Cam Jurgens guy and you got a. You got $68 million, what would you say? What would you. What would you go buy?

[Chick McGee]

A million guitars, 40,000 pianos and a lot of shirts.

[Christy Lee]

Where would you put all those? You'd have to buy my new house.

[Chick McGee]

I don't think I could apply for it, even with a lot of money.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, good to know. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

You'd have to buy cash, right?

[Tom Griswold]

We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios, and this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Josh Arnold]

Just got to get a hold of us. Call fax, mail or email. Get all the contact information you [e-mail] this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Pat Godwin]

Get in the zone.

[Josh Arnold]

AutoZone.

[Tom Griswold]

Welcome to AutoZone.

[Pat Godwin]

What are you working on today?

[Chick McGee]

Worried about your battery and the heat?

[Tom Griswold]

We get it. You don't want to get stranded somewhere with a car that feels like an oven.

[Chick McGee]

We've got you covered at AutoZone, America's.

[Tom Griswold]

Number one battery destination.

[Chick McGee]

Our free battery testing and charging service can help. And if you need a battery, we'll.

[Pat Godwin]

Help you find a new one. No problem.

[Tom Griswold]

Power through with free battery testing and charging at AutoZone.

[Pat Godwin]

Get in the zone.

[Tom Griswold]

Auto zone restrictions apply. Wrestle him, Lord. I'm down.

[Josh Arnold]

Tell it, brother.

[Tom Griswold]

She.

[Josh Arnold]

She just won't leave me.

[Chick McGee]

She won't get out.

[Josh Arnold]

She won't get out of the house. Welcome back to the Bob and Top Show. Christy Lee at the Silac Insurance news desk. Hello, there's Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hello.

[Josh Arnold]

There'S Josh Arnold.

[Pat Godwin]

Remember the Three Stooges when Curly was asked to shave the ice and he whips out the shaving cream and the freezer and he actually shaves the.

[Tom Griswold]

Hilarious.

[Pat Godwin]

And he does the banter, like a barber banter. And at one point he goes, so are you married or are you happy?

[Josh Arnold]

See, that's funny. You didn't tell me that part. That's funny.

[Chick McGee]

That's a good line.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm Chick McGee. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Happy O'Reilly Auto Parts for all your car care needs. Get the parts and service you need fast from the professional parts people at O'Reilly Auto Parts.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, if you watched any of the the NFL draft and they have those, the NFL always has those panels, the official looking sort of deus with eight guys up there, at least eight. Does it remind you of like a bunch of guys in the corner of a bar talking about women they would have absolutely no shot with? Yeah, look at that one. Yeah, sure. Yeah, she's hot. Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

What I do to her.

[Josh Arnold]

Some of the guys, not very many really know what they're talking about. I think Orlovsky does a nice job. I think Lewis Riddick does a great job. Jeff. Saturday.

[Pat Godwin]

I'd like to think I know what I'm talking about when I'm at a bar looking at women. Yeah. If only she were even mildly attracted. I never say things like that.

[Josh Arnold]

What about screaming at her, you'll learn to love me.

[Tom Griswold]

What about that?

[Chick McGee]

She's running away.

[Tom Griswold]

Coming up, we have a fish news for Josh. Josh is Josh And Pat are both fishermen, as is Mr. Oskar.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, these guys are more avid than I am because I have been fishing in a little bit.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, okay.

[Chick McGee]

Recording in my car that I don't want fish stuff in just yet. I'll wait a month. I'll be with you guys soon.

[Pat Godwin]

All right, good.

[Tom Griswold]

We return to the sports page with Chick McGee.

[Josh Arnold]

The world's first live sperm race took place over the weekend, and a USC student took home the title. The student, identified only as Tristan faced off against a student identified as Asher from ucla. Oh, usc. Ucla. Oh, yeah. On a microscopic racetrack.

[Pat Godwin]

This is something.

[Josh Arnold]

According to reports, the race began after sperm samples provided earlier were placed under a microscope. Meanwhile, competitors waited inside giant tubes on stage.

[Tom Griswold]

Huh? Yeah. The two dudes are standing in these huge tubes like. Like a test tube. And then the. The microscope is projected onto a big screen to see which of their seeds. What do they call it? Motility. Is that the word I'm looking for?

[Pat Godwin]

That is the word.

[Josh Arnold]

Motility.

[Christy Lee]

Very good.

[Chick McGee]

Where do they provide the seed?

[Christy Lee]

They don't show that part.

[Tom Griswold]

They. As it says. I believe it says they pro. It was provided in advance, but presumably it has to be, I mean, relatively fresh. Right? Doesn't.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, it would.

[Tom Griswold]

How long does it stay, you know, mobile, if you will.

[Pat Godwin]

They must have put it in something that would. Boy, keep it alive in a way.

[Josh Arnold]

72 hours.

[Tom Griswold]

Is that true? No, I. I mean, it's. I imagine it's fresh from the tap.

[Pat Godwin]

Probably more fresh than not. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

How long. How long does sperm last?

[Chick McGee]

You can freeze it, right?

[Christy Lee]

I think a couple. It depends on the conditions, but I think it can last.

[Tom Griswold]

I think you can freeze it. I think how. This is a race, so they want to see how fast it goes. So I assume they want it as fresh as possible.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

So I'm guessing. I'm guessing these guys were taken backstage and said, okay, give us your. Give us your sample.

[Pat Godwin]

Wow. I hope.

[Tom Griswold]

The announcer was at some point said, and coming in first. It's the University of Southern California.

[Pat Godwin]

What did he win? Do you know?

[Tom Griswold]

A cracker? What.

[Pat Godwin]

You think that'd be the loser?

[Josh Arnold]

I demand. I demand. I strongly urge. I would really like to somebody tell me where that cracker story came from. I know I would say, I don't get it. And two, it doesn't make any sense. You're standing around with a bunch of guys in a circle playing with yourself, and then the guy who completes first eats the cracker. Is that right? Or last?

[Christy Lee]

And I always eat last.

[Pat Godwin]

Everybody completes on the cracker. The guy who's last has to.

[Josh Arnold]

It's on the cracker.

[Pat Godwin]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

That's the first I've heard of this.

[Christy Lee]

Growing up with no guys around. But hearing that story, I thought all guys did that.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, sure. You might have brothers that you play around with. You're all nude running around. Yeah, of course, I'm an only child. I don't.

[Pat Godwin]

I have three brothers and I'll tell you what. Not done in my house.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, finally your dad has some relief.

[Chick McGee]

However, it wasn't done in my house. I'm the oldest of six.

[Josh Arnold]

Did you or did you not go down to the basement and watch Xanadu with Olivia Newton John and Gene Kelly and Roll Abdul around your basement?

[Pat Godwin]

We never watched Xanadu, we merely reenacted it. You don't have to watch it when you're living it.

[Tom Griswold]

What kind of verbiage would your dad use describing situations like that?

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, geez.

[Tom Griswold]

Can it be passed along in the radio?

[Pat Godwin]

Well, they're down there now, aren't they?

[Josh Arnold]

Roller skating, Larry.

[Tom Griswold]

They're rollerskating right now.

[Pat Godwin]

No idea. I was just grazing a fruit market. He would never say anything like that. But he would never talk like that.

[Josh Arnold]

The old fruit market.

[Tom Griswold]

In any event. Yeah, that. So this. I don't know if the sperm racing is. I'm not exactly sure what the point of it was. Was it raising money for charity or something?

[Pat Godwin]

Sure hope so. Hopefully something. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

The race course projected on a large screens around the venue. Crowd could watch every mood. Neat. Tristan won the first event, was awarded the golden sperm trophy to celebrate. The crowd was showered with white confetti.

[Pat Godwin]

That's Funny Fest.

[Tom Griswold]

Kentucky Derby's coming up this weekend.

[Christy Lee]

Yes, it is.

[Tom Griswold]

And the lady. The ladies wear the nice hats.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, that's right.

[Tom Griswold]

The men wear.

[Josh Arnold]

I think we have the race blazers. The names of the horses here second. But first, speaking of races, Emma Maria Mazenga Mazinga just set a world record in the 200 meters for this Italian sprinter. The victory though is chasing what comes next. She's 91 years old.

[Pat Godwin]

Whoa.

[Josh Arnold]

It's a nice result. Last year I ran it in under 50 seconds. She said whoa. She made headlines once again, just moments after setting a new world record in the indoor 200 meters. 54.47 seconds. She's saying she run fat. Ran faster earlier. She was born in 1933. And I believe we have a photograph of Emma. There's Emma.

[Pat Godwin]

Looks very young.

[Josh Arnold]

And on the left you can see by the way, on the left you. I. I will tell you that is Emma, not.

[Tom Griswold]

Wait a minute.

[Josh Arnold]

College basketball coach Rick.

[Tom Griswold]

That's Rick Pino on the left.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

I thought it was Stephen Singer.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, my goodness.

[Pat Godwin]

Doesn't it look like Stephen Singer?

[Josh Arnold]

A little bit, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

There's a certain masculine quality about Emma, I would say, is that. I mean, she's got jet black hair.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, are you saying she colors it? How dare you.

[Christy Lee]

She made. There are some women who don't.

[Pat Godwin]

She has to color it.

[Chick McGee]

No, people that color.

[Christy Lee]

There are women that do not get.

[Tom Griswold]

My aunt had.

[Chick McGee]

That's a. That's colored hair.

[Tom Griswold]

My aunt had almost jet black hair at the age of 85 and did not color it.

[Pat Godwin]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

No, she did.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, I'll trust that you checked the carpet as well and saw that they.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, that's what I did. Hey, and Flo, before I go to bed, you want to give me a quick, quick beef?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, you just.

[Josh Arnold]

You just had it condensed down. Not only a nickname.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I mean, just one word.

[Josh Arnold]

Give me that beef.

[Tom Griswold]

Of course not. All right, well, thank you very much.

[Josh Arnold]

We'll have all 20 horses in the Kentucky Derby when we come back.

[Christy Lee]

All right.

[Josh Arnold]

We'll have Christy pick her favorite.

[Christy Lee]

I have. No, I don't.

[Pat Godwin]

Perfect.

[Christy Lee]

Looked at it.

[Josh Arnold]

Perfect.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, once again, the. I guess there's a certain irony, by the way, in the. In the fact that the Trojans were one of the teams in the sperm races. And did you see the photograph of the guys in the giant. They're standing in giant test tubes.

[Josh Arnold]

No, I couldn't get that story out of my brain fast enough.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, well, we'll see if this is going to become a big annual event, and if they have team uniforms and sponsorships, it may. I mean, they've got a huge camera crew on site if you look at the sperm racing thing. And so we'll see.

[Josh Arnold]

They do.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Honest to God.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Yeah. Why? I'm not sure. I'm not sure. Somehow this must be making money for somebody. But right now I want to remind you that someday you may be retired and hoping to grab that paycheck. Ah, look at this. In the mail. Money. Well, that's gonna be a little bit from Social Security, but probably not enough. That's where having an annuity comes in very handy because the money keeps coming in, and especially if you've been watching the stock market lately. Yikes. It goes up, it goes down. It goes down, down. You want to counter that what they call volatility in the stock market, and that's what an annuity will do for you. Because the money is nice and steady. It's going to keep coming, whatever happens in the stock market. And the authorities on annuities, of course, the Silac Insurance Company. So protect your retirement. Find out what annuities are all about by contacting the folks at the Silac Insurance Company. By the way, there's an easy way now to contact them. Take your phone and go £250. That's sometimes called the hashtag sign or the pound sign. £250 on your phone and say the keywords lifetime income. That's £250. And just say lifetime income and you can talk with someone from SILAC and they'll give you the lowdown on what restrictions might apply, et cetera, et cetera. When it comes to annuities, the Silac Insurance Company. SILAC I N S. And by the way, you can go to silas.com for more information or just go to bobandtom.com we'll hook you up. That's an annuity from the Silac Insurance Company. So when you retire, the money keeps a coming plan. On it. Live on it with our friends at Silac. Coming up, we have Chick McGee, of course at the sports desk. Christy Lee is right over there at the Silac Insurance news desk. And we'll be hearing stories about such important things as incredibly weird fish. We have Loch Ness in the news in a big way. And we have a new thing I did not realize on the university level, the academic level. Count the male members. We'll be doing a little survey. Yes, we're counting the male members. We'll find out it's in an artistic way. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios and this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Josh Arnold]

Ryan Reynolds here from Mint Mobile with.

[Tom Griswold]

A message for everyone Paying big wireless way too much. Please, for the love of everything good in this world, stop with Mint. You can get premium wireless for just $15 a month. Of course, if you enjoy overpaying. No judgments. But that's weird. Okay, one judgment anyway. Give it a try.

[Christy Lee]

@Mintmobile.Com Switch upfront payment of $45 for.

[Jess Hooker]

3 month plan equivalent to $15 per.

[Tom Griswold]

Month required intro rate first 3 months only, then full price plan options available.

[Jess Hooker]

Taxes and fees extra. See full [e-mail].

[Josh Arnold]

Hi, welcome back to the Bob and Tom show at the Silac Insurance news desk, it's Christy Lee. Howdy, there's Pat Godwin.

[Chick McGee]

Hello, Chicky.

[Josh Arnold]

Hello, Jess Hooker.

[Jess Hooker]

Hey, Chicky.

[Josh Arnold]

There's Josh Arnold Hi. At the I hate Stephen Singer sidekick chair. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. I'm Chick McGee and. Hello. Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Chick. Good to see you, sir.

[Josh Arnold]

Right back at you, buddy.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you.

[Josh Arnold]

You seem like you're ornery today.

[Tom Griswold]

Not at all.

[Christy Lee]

Did you have a good weekend?

[Tom Griswold]

Great weekend.

[Josh Arnold]

You were just bragging about the fact you're driving your bicycle around the city this weekend.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

And you. You ran a homeless woman off the sidewalk. Is that what.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm kidding. Of course not.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no. There was one lady walking toward me.

[Josh Arnold]

And you said, what's in the bag? Is that what you said?

[Tom Griswold]

No, no.

[Chick McGee]

She dive into the grass?

[Tom Griswold]

No, I. I very kindly got off the. Off the truck.

[Josh Arnold]

Do you have a bell on your bike?

[Tom Griswold]

I do not.

[Chick McGee]

You have a basket.

[Pat Godwin]

When certain other people walk towards you. How. How often do you quote, very kindly change where you are and say, cross the street?

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, well, it's still. It still stands. He's nice to everyone but us.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, that's true.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, he's wonderful out in the wild.

[Josh Arnold]

You know, I was married to someone like you. Liked it. Nice to everybody else. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Makes sense. Except it's a good way to operate.

[Josh Arnold]

Is it?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Yeah, I was actually. I went to Java House, got got myself. Actually had some delicious iced tea and quite a nice muffin.

[Chick McGee]

Muffin? In the morning.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Well, I'm sure it was a delightful muffin. Did you get any muffin over the weekend?

[Chick McGee]

You know, I am.

[Josh Arnold]

I've heard you haven't seen enough. You haven't seen nothing till you're down on a muffin.

[Christy Lee]

That's what I've heard. Oh, Steven Tyler. Yeah. Important words for us. Them.

[Tom Griswold]

Ms. Hooker has joined us in the studio with your new glasses. I like them.

[Jess Hooker]

Thank you.

[Chick McGee]

I do too.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, they're very serious looking black frames.

[Jess Hooker]

Navy.

[Christy Lee]

They're.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, they are.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Okay.

[Jess Hooker]

Navy blue. Yeah. Changed them a little bit.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

I believe the word you're looking for is stylish. Wouldn't you say?

[Pat Godwin]

They are stylish.

[Jess Hooker]

Thank you. Thank you.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, do you know. Are you aware of the. We had a letter this morning about. About this. And this is in the wake of the discussion of the dangling shoe. You heard about this?

[Josh Arnold]

The shoe dangle.

[Tom Griswold]

The shoe dangle.

[Josh Arnold]

Part of the foot fetish world.

[Jess Hooker]

Like when I have a heel on and it slips. Or I have a heel on and it slips off my heel.

[Chick McGee]

Correct.

[Jess Hooker]

And dangles while I'm shaking my leg. Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but you're demonstrably. This Is done as a hotel bar.

[Christy Lee]

As a flirt.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

100. Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, I don't think a woman has to realize what she's doing.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

She's unaware, I think.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, no. You can do it subconsciously and consciously.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, sure. Yeah. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

But now it helps if she doesn't know.

[Pat Godwin]

Exactly.

[Tom Griswold]

But with glasses. Oh, yeah, there's the. You take the glasses off, right. You hold them up by yourself.

[Josh Arnold]

Look at me when you do it, please.

[Tom Griswold]

And then. And then. And then you take the. What's this thing called?

[Josh Arnold]

The temple?

[Tom Griswold]

The temples.

[Josh Arnold]

You know, there are items that have words.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. I don't have to wear glass. I only have to wear these glasses because of this computer. I don't wear glasses. Glasses. Anyways, you take the glasses.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Take this thing I've always ever called the eyeglasses. And then you touch your lips with it.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And then depending on.

[Josh Arnold]

Don't tease us.

[Tom Griswold]

That's the thing. See the tease. And then suck on it. And then.

[Josh Arnold]

Then you do the.

[Tom Griswold]

Then you do the insertion.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And that implies. This is me and you later.

[Christy Lee]

I don't think that. Guys.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, that's written down.

[Josh Arnold]

No, guys.

[Jess Hooker]

Absolutely cannot do that.

[Tom Griswold]

No. I was trying to portray a young lady. Yeah. Now, Chrissy, you've been wearing glasses since you were three. No, no, chick.

[Christy Lee]

You.

[Pat Godwin]

They're right. You. You cannot do.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, you can.

[Josh Arnold]

Is this not sexy?

[Tom Griswold]

No, no.

[Pat Godwin]

Boy, looks like you're about to blow into a straw to turn left.

[Tom Griswold]

Could be me. Make boom, boom. Christy, you've been wearing glasses since you were literally three years old.

[Christy Lee]

And I don't have to wear them now, so I still wear them. Just because you don't have to wear.

[Chick McGee]

Them, you can leave them off. You look good.

[Christy Lee]

I do?

[Tom Griswold]

Absolutely.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, I don't. I'm. My bangs are so long, I can't wear them right now because.

[Tom Griswold]

So the. Right now, the main function of your glasses is keeping your bangs out of your eyes.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

But do you do the. Do you do the glasses?

[Christy Lee]

No, this is the first time because I've always had to wear them to see.

[Jess Hooker]

So she couldn't flirt with them.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I couldn't see you. To flirt with you.

[Tom Griswold]

You ever do it with a pen or a pencil?

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

I'm not a pen chewer. I don't like that.

[Chick McGee]

You ever do with it?

[Tom Griswold]

Never mind.

[Josh Arnold]

Have you ever.

[Pat Godwin]

What's that, Pat we're calling a Bach on?

[Tom Griswold]

There's a reason that Pat just plays the guitar.

[Christy Lee]

That's not flirting. That's a relationship.

[Josh Arnold]

Have you ever Taken your glasses off to flirt and then put your glasses back on and realize the guy you're flirting with. Real, real ugly.

[Christy Lee]

No, I've never done that.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but did you consciously do that?

[Jess Hooker]

No, I don't think so.

[Tom Griswold]

You do. With a pencil.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Swizzle stick.

[Tom Griswold]

No, with us, I think it's cute.

[Jess Hooker]

When a girl puts a pencil behind her ear. Like, you know, if we're working. Or a pen. Right. You have the library fetish. Librarian fetish, don't you? Yeah, that's Jeffy's thing.

[Tom Griswold]

What's the librarian fetish?

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, everything. You're talking about glasses, the whole thing. Just very, very bookish looking.

[Tom Griswold]

And then you take the glasses off and shake the head. And the classic, yes. Yeah, but I.

[Jess Hooker]

And she's gorgeous a lot.

[Pat Godwin]

There are a lot of cute girls with glasses on with their hair up who don't have to shake their hair out and take their glasses. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That trope is sort of.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah. Well, thank you, chicken chicks. Now tonguing his.

[Jess Hooker]

Well, what do you guys do to flirt with us if we're flipping our heels?

[Chick McGee]

Bring out a credit card.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, I love.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, look at you.

[Josh Arnold]

I'll look at her.

[Chick McGee]

I mean, my debit card. I'm sorry, I don't have a credit.

[Josh Arnold]

I'll be out in the kitchen. I go, I'm gonna make a sandwich. And I grab my crotch and I say, you want any of this before I put it away?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, that works.

[Chick McGee]

We all know that.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, it's the subtle approach.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

That always works.

[Josh Arnold]

She loves it.

[Jess Hooker]

Okay, well, I love all this visual comedy this morning chick.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Thank you. Thank you very much.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much indeed. If you're just joining us. Thank you for joining us.

[Christy Lee]

I'm a hair tweet. Twirler. Is that something?

[Chick McGee]

That is something.

[Christy Lee]

Is that something? Oh, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Didn't we have a story about being a hair twirler? It was something. Something about your imagination or. So didn't we have some sort of psychological really about that means.

[Chick McGee]

That means she's into you. If she's twirling her hair, is that what it means? I think not in my case, but that's funny.

[Jess Hooker]

Christy only twirls her hair when all of you guys leave.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, well, that tracks.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I do it out of.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm trying to find hair twirling. I don't see anything. Give me a few minutes.

[Christy Lee]

And it's weird because Ava does the exact same thing the exact same way. How weird?

[Josh Arnold]

Well, that's Genetics. That Gregory, right? It's Gregor Mendel. He had something, didn't he?

[Christy Lee]

It's really.

[Pat Godwin]

There was a musician here, Machine Gun Kelly.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

And your daughter. And you were both watching the show. Both twirling your hair at the same time.

[Christy Lee]

Exactly.

[Pat Godwin]

It was so hot.

[Christy Lee]

My daughter's 27. For those of you, Jeff, have you.

[Josh Arnold]

Ever had an occasion for the mother daughter?

[Pat Godwin]

No.

[Josh Arnold]

Pat Godwin.

[Chick McGee]

Mother daughter, no.

[Josh Arnold]

Down there in Miami. Come on.

[Chick McGee]

Mother, daughter, no.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, man, I didn't know that happened in real life.

[Josh Arnold]

Why are you violent about it?

[Pat Godwin]

Why have you check.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

So anyway, here's the Kentucky Derby.

[Tom Griswold]

If you just join.

[Josh Arnold]

I told him. I said, hey, you want any?

[Tom Griswold]

If you're Jeff. If you're just joining us, thanks. This is the Bob and Tom Show. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. And there's Chick McGee right there.

[Josh Arnold]

Kentucky Derby coming up this Saturday. Tom, would you like to hear the list of the horses?

[Tom Griswold]

Absolutely.

[Josh Arnold]

Of course you would.

[Pat Godwin]

Where are they running it this year?

[Christy Lee]

Lexington.

[Pat Godwin]

Neutral site. Every year.

[Jess Hooker]

Right.

[Chick McGee]

Change as it changes.

[Christy Lee]

They've moved to Keeneland just to throw.

[Josh Arnold]

People off the run for the tulips. I think is what it's called. Citizen Bull. Oh, and write this down. Ready? Get a pen. N E, O, E, Q, U, O.

[Pat Godwin]

S. N, E, O, E, Q, U.

[Josh Arnold]

O, S. I got no idea.

[Christy Lee]

Neo Equious.

[Josh Arnold]

Neo Equus.

[Pat Godwin]

It's not spelled like equus, though. The.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, there's two. Is there two U's. Anyway, final gambit. Rodriguez starting out of the fourth post.

[Pat Godwin]

We don't need the names of the jockeys.

[Chick McGee]

Chick.

[Josh Arnold]

American Promise, Admire Daytona, Luxor Cafe Journalism. That's your favorite at three to one.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, that horse is almost dead.

[Chick McGee]

That is a little self Chicago.

[Josh Arnold]

That is fresh as today's Burnham Square Grande. Flying Mohawk. I like the sound of that.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

East Avenue publisher. Tiz Tastic. Not Titastic. It's Tiz Tastic.

[Tom Griswold]

Or Titastic would be.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, yeah, those are titastic.

[Tom Griswold]

That'd be very, very awkward for the United Sweeney.

[Pat Godwin]

I was wondering what would send it over the top for me. And it was. Those are. That's all it needed.

[Josh Arnold]

Actually. Vagtastic Mace is a little better, right? It's vagtastic. Render Judgment, Coal Battle, Sandman Sovereignty, Chunk of Gold and Owen Almighty.

[Pat Godwin]

All right.

[Josh Arnold]

Which I believe is the sequel to Bruce Almighty, isn't it?

[Pat Godwin]

I think I have Heaven Almighty.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

I have the list of the four horses least likely to win.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Mr. Ed Asner.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah. That One's not going anywhere.

[Josh Arnold]

I did like the way you delivered it, though. Mr. Ed Asner.

[Chick McGee]

He even lurched forward.

[Tom Griswold]

Here comes the slug. It doesn't. Doesn't have a chance this year.

[Josh Arnold]

Isn't a perfect gentleman in there too?

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. Because every time the race starts, he just. He goes after you.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. And Lard Ass Larry.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Every year, Lard Ass Larry. If not.

[Pat Godwin]

No, he's got heart, though.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, a lot of heart.

[Josh Arnold]

Now, isn't there a clearinghouse or a board or some sort of process they have to go through so you can name your horse. You just can't name it anything.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah, it's like akc. It's like naming your dog.

[Josh Arnold]

Really?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

I named. A long time ago when I was a kid, I named one of my dogs with akc. I named it Fartknocker. They didn't say anything, really. Go right ahead.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, I would hope so.

[Josh Arnold]

And I said, we're in Fart Knocker.

[Tom Griswold]

That's my least favorite Foreigner song, by the way.

[Josh Arnold]

We've got a world record. Please hold your applause.

[Christy Lee]

Are you gonna pick a derby winner?

[Josh Arnold]

Oh.

[Tom Griswold]

Given time.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. When did we. When did they some. A long shot one.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Was it a couple years ago?

[Josh Arnold]

Was it last year? 4,000 eggs, an entire truckload of sugar and cream, and a team of French pastry chefs completed a strawberry cake measuring 399ft, 8 inches long.

[Tom Griswold]

So it wasn't a shortcake. It couldn't have been. That was right there.

[Pat Godwin]

It was. It was the right way to go.

[Christy Lee]

It was the right thing to do.

[Josh Arnold]

It was the right thing to do. They say the cake is the longest cake ever made. The project led by master pastry chef Yusef El Gatu, who.

[Tom Griswold]

Elgatu.

[Josh Arnold]

Elgatu.

[Tom Griswold]

You say Elgatu.

[Josh Arnold]

Who assembled a team of 20 chefs to bring the vision, does not mean the cast.

[Pat Godwin]

By the way, that's gato.

[Christy Lee]

Gato is cat.

[Tom Griswold]

Cat cake would be.

[Pat Godwin]

That is Spanish.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, look. French. Spanish. They're close enough. All right.

[Josh Arnold]

The cake weighed 1.2 tons and took an entire week to prepare. The enormous dessert was displayed across rows of tables in an ice rink in the Paris suburb of a French sounding city.

[Christy Lee]

Okay. Oh, my. Look at that.

[Pat Godwin]

Looks delicious.

[Josh Arnold]

But it's. And it's in two sections, right?

[Pat Godwin]

It is. Oh, no.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Thank you.

[Chick McGee]

Is looks like it ends there.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, but it doesn't.

[Tom Griswold]

But as Josh has pointed out before, it's. This is whatever 600 cakes just laid down together.

[Josh Arnold]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

It's not one long cake that would.

[Christy Lee]

Have worked they got a world record.

[Jess Hooker]

So, yeah, it's iced and decorated together. That makes it a cake in a way.

[Tom Griswold]

More than a ton.

[Christy Lee]

Who got to eat it?

[Tom Griswold]

The folks from the French sounding suburb.

[Chick McGee]

Let them eat cake.

[Pat Godwin]

I let them eat cake.

[Christy Lee]

Indeed.

[Tom Griswold]

And the big. The big fat chick over there said, do you have any gluten free? I'm eating this, but I'm taking a chance. This is my fourth piece, but I'm taking a chance. I think I'm Celia. Whatever it is.

[Jess Hooker]

Celiac.

[Tom Griswold]

That's my favorite insurance company boy.

[Pat Godwin]

This lady, I don't want to sit next to her anymore.

[Tom Griswold]

I have Gad.

[Josh Arnold]

Cake gives me Gad.

[Tom Griswold]

My fifth beast has to be gluten free.

[Pat Godwin]

Ma'am, I can't help but notice you've scraped off the strawberries.

[Tom Griswold]

They're poison. They're from Wuhan.

[Pat Godwin]

I like everything in strawberry shortcake. Don't care for strawberry shortcake as much as I should, really. For the amount of how much I love strawberries. How much I love, well, you know, essentially Twinkie bowls.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

I grew up on white trash strawberry cake, which is strawberry shortcake, which is the. It looks like hockey pucks. You buy. Evidently, true strawberry shortcake is like a cookie.

[Tom Griswold]

It's.

[Josh Arnold]

It's.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, really?

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, shortcake. True shortcake.

[Tom Griswold]

I have to call my sister, see if she has my mom's recipe for angel food cake. Did you ever have that?

[Pat Godwin]

I've never been a fan.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, it's soft and delicious.

[Pat Godwin]

No, it's way too airy and light.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, it's delight. Oh, you like?

[Pat Godwin]

I want a dense cake.

[Tom Griswold]

Dense, thick.

[Pat Godwin]

I want a pound cake. Yeah, I do.

[Josh Arnold]

I want one. When you pick up the cake, you have somebody. Hey, come over here. Lift this.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, yeah, that's what I want. I want a cake that'll give you tendonitis.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, that's how it is.

[Jess Hooker]

I. I didn't make a cake, but I made a pie. I missed Tom's birthday last week, so I made him a pie. Yeah, A triple layer key lime pie.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yes, it's here now.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, it's in the green.

[Josh Arnold]

Key lime pie. The green of Glade air freshener I love in a pie. Is it green?

[Jess Hooker]

No, it's not green. There's some lime on top, but yeah, it's delicious.

[Pat Godwin]

Will you try it, Chase?

[Tom Griswold]

No. Oh, thank you. I love key lime pie. Thank you.

[Josh Arnold]

Matter of fact, I might just go wipe my ass now.

[Christy Lee]

That's not very nice.

[Tom Griswold]

What's coming up?

[Josh Arnold]

May I add the key lime pie? If I have a buyer.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, I'll talk to you, Christy. What's coming up in the news?

[Christy Lee]

We have Loch Ness in the news. We have. We didn't get to last week, our old people stories.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, hey, we've got one more sports story coming up that I've forgotten for the past six days. Today we're gonna do it. Remind me. Tom, look at me. Deep into my eyes. Remind me. Hey, dude, shoes. Remind me.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, dude.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, dude, shoes. Coming up. All right, once again, we are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Chick McGee]

Want to share something?

[Josh Arnold]

Send us an email. Bob and tomobandtom.com this is the Bob and Tom Show. This message comes from Greenlight.

[Tom Griswold]

Ready to start talking to your kids about financial literacy? Meet Greenlight, the debit card and money.

[Jess Hooker]

App that teaches kids and teens how to earn, save, spend wisely and invest with your guardrails in place. With Greenlight, you can send money to.

[Tom Griswold]

Kids quickly, set up chores automate allowance.

[Jess Hooker]

And keep an eye on your kids.

[Tom Griswold]

Spending with real time notifications.

[Jess Hooker]

Join millions of parents and kids building.

[Tom Griswold]

Healthy financial habits together on Greenlight. Get started risk [e-mail] Spotify USA.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show.

[Tom Griswold]

We're all here.

[Josh Arnold]

Josh Arnold, Christy Lee, Pat Godwin. Wheel K. Pat. Okay, okay. Jess Hooker. Hi, Jeff. Oscar is here. I'm Chick McGee. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm going down the.

[Josh Arnold]

And here's the Captain Wormhole.

[Christy Lee]

Of what?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, a Chick was mentioning the horses in this year's Kentucky Derby.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, sir.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm just looking at some of the past horses and some of the ones that didn't make it. It's always fun someone.

[Josh Arnold]

What do you mean?

[Christy Lee]

What do you mean, didn't make it?

[Pat Godwin]

They were not eligible for the Kentucky.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Qualifying. Oh, okay. I got you.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Astro Glide didn't make it.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, usually that goes in.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, he runs well in the mud.

[Pat Godwin]

Okay, you've got this cover.

[Chick McGee]

He's got plenty of jokes for this.

[Josh Arnold]

He's a mudder.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, his mudder's a mudder.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, God. Actually, this is. I. When I was doing my research, I stumbled on this unfortunate article. This is from the Lexington Herald Leader.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, they know about horses.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, they certainly do. But this goes back a couple of years. You can apparently buy the droppings of a horse that won the Kentucky Derby.

[Pat Godwin]

Really?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. 200 bucks. Not bad.

[Josh Arnold]

What.

[Christy Lee]

What would you use them for?

[Tom Griswold]

It's from a place called Kentucky For Kentucky. Wow.

[Josh Arnold]

How Kentucky can you get.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow. I like it.

[Pat Godwin]

You could fertilize a plant with the Kentucky Derby.

[Tom Griswold]

Winger, these are more works of art.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, they make them into like.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, you can hide your keys in them.

[Tom Griswold]

It's a 16 ounce Mason jar containing a nugget of the fecal production of a Kentucky Derby winner preserved in epoxy resin.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, geez.

[Josh Arnold]

What? Preserved an epoxy resin.

[Christy Lee]

A piece of poop.

[Tom Griswold]

It's a horse turds.

[Pat Godwin]

Isn't that something?

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, I know you like Joe Theisman, but you wouldn't want to have a chick. I got you something nice for Christmas.

[Chick McGee]

He's got a jock strap.

[Josh Arnold]

I used to have Mark Rippon's jock strap.

[Pat Godwin]

That's a museum whose time has come, isn't it? The famous Turd Museum of horses.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Look, it's Seabiscuits biscuit.

[Pat Godwin]

I'm saying of everybody.

[Josh Arnold]

Why haven't they come out with a cookie jar that when you lift the lid to get a cookie, it's a horse's head and he goes.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm sure you could come up with that.

[Pat Godwin]

You know what? I'd seen somebody on the ground floor.

[Josh Arnold]

That's a million dollar idea. What do you think?

[Pat Godwin]

We haven't sold 100,000 for 20.

[Josh Arnold]

We've got a deal.

[Pat Godwin]

Am I locked in legally?

[Josh Arnold]

You owe me 100k, baby.

[Tom Griswold]

Now this year's Mid Julep's gonna have that special garnish.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, nuggets.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow. I'll keep. I'll keep digging trying to find more horse information for you and we'll talk with our horse expert later on this week.

[Josh Arnold]

Tom, I have a question for you. You went to college, is that right?

[Tom Griswold]

Barely.

[Josh Arnold]

Did you. Did you party when you were at college? What? We would consider partying. And if you did. What. What party?

[Tom Griswold]

The big party night was Thursday night.

[Jess Hooker]

Pictures.

[Josh Arnold]

So did you. Penny pitchers?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Holy hell.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, that had to end.

[Josh Arnold]

They were.

[Jess Hooker]

I mean, honestly, they were. The pictures that probably helped had 16, 20 ounces of beer in them, you know, but they were a penny.

[Pat Godwin]

You walked around with them.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Holy heck.

[Tom Griswold]

Guy. A guy in. We had. There was a center right near the. The dorm.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

When I was a freshman. Every college has one of those places.

[Josh Arnold]

Called SUNY hall and.

[Tom Griswold]

No, it was just. It was a fun evening, but there was. There was a very corpulent fellow who was in our class. Probably weighed, I don't know, 333-50-0400.

[Chick McGee]

That happened at an awkward moment that.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah. I'm sorry, you guys have the TV rigged when he says, corpulent fellow. I show up on the tv.

[Tom Griswold]

I did not. I didn't plan that.

[Josh Arnold]

Who's responsible? We've got a story.

[Tom Griswold]

No, this guy was twice your size.

[Josh Arnold]

We have. We have a story coming up that involves a picture.

[Tom Griswold]

Is what this guy's name was. This guy's name was Tim. What are you doing? I had nothing to do with this. I can't even tell the story now.

[Pat Godwin]

No, you're good. His name was Tim.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Anyway, Tim.

[Pat Godwin]

And he was very large.

[Tom Griswold]

Very, very, very large.

[Pat Godwin]

So twice my size would be close to five bills.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, he was. Well, he was way over five. Way into the threes, put it that way.

[Pat Godwin]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Very, very big guy. And super intelligent, by the way. And no.

[Josh Arnold]

Did he talk like this?

[Tom Griswold]

No longer with us.

[Josh Arnold]

This would be a good party if he was in charge.

[Tom Griswold]

It was. It was a pitcher chugging contest.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Tremendously bad idea.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

And he just opened his throat and just down the pitcher in like five.

[Jess Hooker]

Sorted down. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And then he puked all over the front row.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

And you were there to see it?

[Tom Griswold]

I was there. I was of course, in the back judging.

[Christy Lee]

Of course.

[Tom Griswold]

Not officially. Just.

[Josh Arnold]

So what are the games?

[Tom Griswold]

Look at these losers.

[Josh Arnold]

Just for fun, what are the games you guys play? Kids play? I've never done beer. There's beer pong, but then there's like flippy.

[Jess Hooker]

Flippy cup.

[Christy Lee]

Flippy cup.

[Tom Griswold]

Quarters.

[Josh Arnold]

Quarters. You ever play flippy cup or quarters?

[Tom Griswold]

God, no. Think of the germs. You know, filthy money is.

[Christy Lee]

You weren't always this germaphobic, boy.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, we Christian.

[Tom Griswold]

I know better. Drinking properly does not involve games or gamesmanship.

[Christy Lee]

Nobody's talking about drinking properly, gentlemen.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I say it's 5, 15 sours and 4 quarters and we'll see who can barf the quickest.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, I. Because I. I also was not a. A drinking game guy, but that's because I was on the. The other side of it. It slowed me down.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, same here.

[Chick McGee]

Let's get to the guzzle.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah. What are we doing?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Cut out the middle and shotgun during this game. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

So anyway, you guys have played beer pong.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

How many people are in here? I have played it everybody, but. But Tom and Pat.

[Pat Godwin]

It is fun.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, now you. They have an actual shoe that you can use that you can wear while you're playing beer pong. It's from the people who make. Hey, dude shoes. These are slip ons. Incredibly comfortable. They are have. As you can see, they have the solo. The red cup solo logo inside. And if you look on the. They have. Hey Dude. Ping pong balls that conveniently fit in the pockets. They're great on each side of the. Hey dude. And then on the. On the. Where laces would be. But hey dudes don't have laces for the most part. Part. That is a beer. A beer bottle opener.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, nice.

[Josh Arnold]

That is attached to the shoe.

[Tom Griswold]

Where did the ping pong ball. I don't understand.

[Josh Arnold]

See the side right there?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

Do you guys have hey Dudes?

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Pat Godwin]

No. I remember the Nickelodeon show about the.

[Jess Hooker]

I know.

[Pat Godwin]

That's fun times on a horse ranch.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

It's called hey Dude.

[Jess Hooker]

Hey Dude.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey Dude.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, they're great.

[Tom Griswold]

Do they have a number of different types of shoes?

[Jess Hooker]

Yes, they have a ton of different designs. They're. They're actually like doc shoes is what they're supposed to be. Easy to slip on, slip off, go into the Marina and have your close toe.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, so they're like Topsiders, except less classy.

[Christy Lee]

Yes. They're canvas, they're not leather.

[Josh Arnold]

You could have stopped it less.

[Pat Godwin]

Whatever you can drink out of them, they're just less.

[Jess Hooker]

I don't think.

[Pat Godwin]

Because there are some. Have you guys ever.

[Josh Arnold]

Those are. What is the name of that sandal that you.

[Christy Lee]

That had the flask in it?

[Josh Arnold]

Right in the back. It had a. Oh, yes.

[Tom Griswold]

In the sole of the shoe.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Pat Godwin]

Sometimes there are rules of you have to shoot the boot where you have to drink a beer out of somebody's shoe.

[Josh Arnold]

I haven't heard this.

[Pat Godwin]

It's kind of like an add on rule if you want.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

So you pour the beer into the.

[Pat Godwin]

Boot, into somebody else's shoe, and you have to drink it out of it.

[Christy Lee]

No way.

[Pat Godwin]

So it's German.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Tastes like. It tastes like Desenix.

[Jess Hooker]

Gross.

[Christy Lee]

You put Desinex in your shoes?

[Tom Griswold]

That's for athlete's foot, right?

[Christy Lee]

I don't know.

[Josh Arnold]

You got a problem?

[Chick McGee]

No, we. We don't use that powder.

[Pat Godwin]

You use it sort of proactively, don't you?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, a little.

[Chick McGee]

You don't put a little powder in the bun?

[Christy Lee]

No, I don't use a little powder.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't think you use a little. Don't you? When you put it in your sock, it looks like you're smuggling cocaine.

[Pat Godwin]

His feet look like pig pen.

[Tom Griswold]

I had to. This is true. I had to take like six jackets to the dry cleaner because I'd been doing it in my closet and the. The. The excess had settled in the shoulders. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Of course.

[Tom Griswold]

I've learned now not to use too Much.

[Josh Arnold]

That might be an indicator that you're using too much.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but it feels so good right now. I'm wiggling my toes going, hi, boys. Feel good down there? Yep. Got my powder.

[Pat Godwin]

Boy.

[Josh Arnold]

Of all of us, and he can deny this, he has the most intense, worst foot odor in the room.

[Tom Griswold]

Not true at all.

[Josh Arnold]

Absolutely.

[Tom Griswold]

Often wear two pair of socks a day. He has change them at the gym.

[Josh Arnold]

Bird feet. He could. He could.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

On a telephone line he could comfortably wrap his feet around.

[Christy Lee]

Okay, now you're being me.

[Tom Griswold]

All right, now I'm not. I do have. I do have another list of courses. Horses not to bet on in some of the preliminary races.

[Josh Arnold]

Do not.

[Tom Griswold]

At Churchill Downs.

[Josh Arnold]

Do not bet on these horses.

[Tom Griswold]

Do not. Okay, Garfield's litter box. Don't bet on that one. Runs like a donkey. No, no. Arbuckle Champagne. Don't bet on that one. Odor in the court. Not a. Not. Not a good one.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, I like that one.

[Tom Griswold]

And finally, of course, Slump Buster. Don't. Don't bend on Slump Buster. And then, of course, the. The one that almost made it Mr. McGlue.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, boy.

[Chick McGee]

Pretty good.

[Josh Arnold]

What part do they make glue out of?

[Pat Godwin]

It's got to be a hole, right?

[Tom Griswold]

All right.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay. The mouth.

[Pat Godwin]

Suddenly he doesn't want to talk.

[Chick McGee]

That's enough of that.

[Josh Arnold]

Suddenly he comes up with. Mr. McGlue. I taking it too far. You're right.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, but the one one you want to bet on.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Thunderous dump.

[Chick McGee]

That's what he wanted.

[Josh Arnold]

Somebody knows. Someone knows the audience.

[Tom Griswold]

They're trying to y.

[Christy Lee]

Thank you. What?

[Tom Griswold]

I was thinking Thunderous Stone about pictures of Muhammad.

[Pat Godwin]

I like drawings of Muhammad. Should be real. Yeah. Yeah. Let's get.

[Christy Lee]

Boy, I don't even get.

[Chick McGee]

I do. I'm lost.

[Pat Godwin]

You don't want to draw. Google Charlie Hebdo.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, there you go. Okay, well, those are just some of the horses you don't want to bet on. I'll remind you, we are in the O'Reilly Auto Part Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Josh Arnold]

Become a Bob and Tom VIP and get your Bob and Tom fix 24.

[Chick McGee]

7.

[Josh Arnold]

Get all the info in the VIP [e-mail] this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Christy Lee]

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[Tom Griswold]

Great job right here.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Top Show. Christy Lee at the Silac Insurance news desk.

[Christy Lee]

Hi.

[Josh Arnold]

There's Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hello.

[Josh Arnold]

Hello. Jess Hooker.

[Pat Godwin]

Hi.

[Josh Arnold]

There's Josh Arnold chickster at the IHC. Stephen Singer, sidekick, chair. I'm Chick McGee. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Jeff Oskar's here as well. Hello, Tom. How are you doing?

[Tom Griswold]

Just fine, thank you, Chick McGee.

[Josh Arnold]

I have a report in from, let's see, Northern Kentucky. This is a letter just received. Are you ready?

[Tom Griswold]

Is this another horse not to bet on?

[Josh Arnold]

Hey, friends. No, they're just. We were talking about come and go convenience stores. The Satin. What is it? The Chat and Scat is also another convenience store.

[Tom Griswold]

Right.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, according to Nate. Hey, friends. We have a local store here in Northern Kentucky called the Gas Hole.

[Pat Godwin]

Wow.

[Chick McGee]

Good for them.

[Josh Arnold]

By the way, the Gasole is right next to the liquor box.

[Pat Godwin]

Could this be true?

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know if it's true or not.

[Pat Godwin]

I mean, now I don't know what is true and what isn't.

[Josh Arnold]

Right?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, right.

[Josh Arnold]

He had me. If he'd stopped at Gasole.

[Pat Godwin]

Right, Right.

[Josh Arnold]

But liquor box?

[Tom Griswold]

I doubt it.

[Christy Lee]

Chat and Scat is a place in Louisiana, Arkansas.

[Pat Godwin]

Shad and scat is redundant.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Although I guess it's not scat until it's been shat.

[Christy Lee]

True.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, there you go.

[Tom Griswold]

So thank you for the exegesis on the phraseology.

[Josh Arnold]

You do you.

[Christy Lee]

Yes, if it's a verb. Right.

[Pat Godwin]

It's the noun scatter.

[Josh Arnold]

Noun.

[Christy Lee]

Right.

[Josh Arnold]

In that case, shad is a verb.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah. But there's a technical problem with tense. I don't want to get into it. Right, right, right. I'm just. Steal my Kentucky Derby thing.

[Pat Godwin]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Horses not to bet on.

[Josh Arnold]

Are you still on this?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I love these.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Triple Crown Royal Wobbly.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah. Doesn't always run straight.

[Tom Griswold]

It Euthanize me. That.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, yeah, that's.

[Josh Arnold]

That one that seems aggressive.

[Tom Griswold]

Is a bad horse.

[Chick McGee]

Euthanize me.

[Josh Arnold]

Let me go.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm sorry. You have another letter over there.

[Chick McGee]

Letters.

[Josh Arnold]

Dear Bob and Tom, I went to the grocery store this weekend. This is from David in Cedar Falls, Iowa.

[Pat Godwin]

What if that was it?

[Josh Arnold]

Cedar Falls. I love that we had the check in that one morning. Cedar Falls. And gets right back up. While I was there, a woman walked in wearing pajama bottoms. And slippers. She was also carrying around a small dog in the grocery store. I thought, what would Tom do? Say something to the manager? No, I just finished my shopping. Then Sunday, I had to go back to the store, a different one. And there were two women, both wearing pajama bottoms and slippers. They each had a cart with Bud Light and Ding Dongs.

[Tom Griswold]

What?

[Josh Arnold]

He said I Chick. I was hoping they'd get Miller Light and grapes for you. Well, thank you, David. Appreciate that.

[Christy Lee]

This is from Illinois. Good morning. Earlier this morning, we were talking about phrases that you said as a kid, but you didn't realize they were dirty until you were older, like horn blows. How about the drawing?

[Jess Hooker]

That was my favorite one.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, well, this was. This young man says, when I was five or six years old, my dad had a T shirt with a cartoon drawing of a fishing pole with a cute worm wrapped around the hook. He wore it all the time. The shirt said, it's not how deep you fish, it's how you wiggle your worm. He said, only in the last few years did I actually realize what that shirt meant. Well, thank you very much, Carly.

[Jess Hooker]

I got in trouble for wearing a Bob and Tom shirt to school. When I think it was sixth grade. It was a local T shirt, and Bob and Tom were on the front, the caricatures. And then it had basketball players that were all taller than them. And it said, everybody's nuts over us.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, you remember that shirt?

[Tom Griswold]

I don't remember that shirt.

[Jess Hooker]

I don't remember that shirt.

[Tom Griswold]

Out.

[Jess Hooker]

Yep. I was. I was given a school T shirt and said, change.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Okay.

[Christy Lee]

We don't know.

[Jess Hooker]

I didn't know. I thought it was funny.

[Tom Griswold]

I can tell you this. We have a new shirt coming out.

[Christy Lee]

Really?

[Tom Griswold]

Does not reference anyone's nuts.

[Jess Hooker]

That's good.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, we'll have that for you in a couple of days. I'll let you know. In the meantime, have we finished visiting the sports page?

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, we have.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, that means we're gonna go over that way where I see Christy Lee at the. The Silac Insurance news desk.

[Josh Arnold]

And are you wearing a blazer? Is that just a coat?

[Jess Hooker]

You look like a cardigan sweater.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, okay. You look a news TV ish over there.

[Christy Lee]

I have a job after to do for the show.

[Josh Arnold]

Is that right?

[Christy Lee]

Interviewing some people for the Java House. Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

No kidding. Well, that's interesting.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

All right.

[Christy Lee]

Hey, over the weekend, we had some serious news. The Pope was buried. There was a big funeral on Saturday.

[Josh Arnold]

He's just too pooped to Pope.

[Christy Lee]

They also have this to report from the Vatican.

[Pat Godwin]

Was that in the eulogy?

[Christy Lee]

Wouldn't that been funny?

[Josh Arnold]

And he was a two poop to Pope.

[Christy Lee]

250,000 mourners paid their respects to the pontiff as he laid in state inside St. Peter's Basilica. However, during that time, the officials of the Vatican had to ask visitors to stop taking selfies with the late Pope's body. Photos and videos show that many visitors bowed their heads somberly upon approaching Pope Francis's coffin. However, some were seen holding their phones up in order to take photos of his body as well as selfies.

[Pat Godwin]

That's really something.

[Josh Arnold]

Is this funny? In one of those airplane type movies, the Zucker Brothers, the Pope takes off his hat and his hair is the same shape as his hat.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah, that's.

[Tom Griswold]

Funny thing.

[Josh Arnold]

There's. Okay, thank you.

[Tom Griswold]

And by the way, if. Yeah, I saw that some people were posting them on Facebook.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

It's just very poor.

[Jess Hooker]

You guys come from a funeral photo? Family?

[Christy Lee]

No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

[Tom Griswold]

Do you?

[Christy Lee]

I do.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Really?

[Jess Hooker]

Yep. There's not selfies, but there's always. There's a picture of every person that's passed away in my family. In the coffin?

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. By themselves or is there someone next?

[Jess Hooker]

No, there's never anyone. Awesome.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you.

[Jess Hooker]

They're usually. They're tucked in the funeral program and then usually kept in someone's bible where they live.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, the one.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, thanks.

[Tom Griswold]

The one that I saw a selfie where the. The girls kind of.

[Jess Hooker]

That's so bizarre.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

You can see the. The Pope lying in state in the background and probably for her bumble profile, something classy. There you go.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah. Let people know she's a religious woman.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

That is really the thing that was really upsetting were the nuns taking pictures. They. I'm not making that up. No.

[Pat Godwin]

That almost makes more sense to me than a regular person.

[Jess Hooker]

She was like really upset.

[Josh Arnold]

The one that was crying.

[Tom Griswold]

Were they. Were they in the picture too?

[Christy Lee]

No, they were just.

[Tom Griswold]

They were just taking a picture of the casket.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh. Yeah. See, I don't know. They have. They can do whatever they want. They're. They're his employees.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I guess.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, when I think the one guy. Well, the one guy trying on. Trying on the hat. I thought that was a little. That's in poor taste.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah. Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

You don't take the hat off, I.

[Christy Lee]

Won'T be taking any photos.

[Tom Griswold]

Are most people buried with headgear?

[Josh Arnold]

Is that a. Yeah, yeah. Oh, baseball hats. Yeah, they are.

[Jess Hooker]

No, they're usually in the. They're in the cat casket.

[Josh Arnold]

Or they put them on the.

[Jess Hooker]

You know what I mean? They put.

[Pat Godwin]

Right.

[Jess Hooker]

Like, on the casket.

[Pat Godwin]

My dad was screaming with his favorite hat because I was. I go, hey, can I have my dad's hat? And she goes, oh, no. He took it with him. Oh, all right. Oh, waste of a good hat.

[Chick McGee]

Waste of a good hat.

[Jess Hooker]

Way to go, dad.

[Josh Arnold]

He had a hat.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank God you got that watcher off before the flames hit the Rolex.

[Christy Lee]

Just barely wearing it in heaven. Just think of it that way.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, we're getting an update on Northern Kentucky. This is from Jake. Dear radio legends, I am also from Northern Kentucky. I will confirm there is a place called the Liquor Box right next to the Gas Hole.

[Pat Godwin]

Whoa.

[Josh Arnold]

And up the road is a wing restaurant called Knuck and Futs.

[Tom Griswold]

That sounds crazy.

[Pat Godwin]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

That's what it says. Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

There you go.

[Christy Lee]

The whole town has a theme, right?

[Chick McGee]

That's a. Jake.

[Josh Arnold]

That was from Jake in Burlington, Kentucky.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, thank you very much, Jake. So it's out there, and we have.

[Josh Arnold]

Pictures now coming with the guys.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Okay, good. In the meantime, Christy, what else?

[Christy Lee]

Police in Lufkin, Texas, are searching for Mr. Avante Nicholson. Why, you ask? Well, Mr. Nicholson is accused of leaving plastic Easter eggs filled with marijuana at public parks and a motel. Nicholson allegedly posted photos on Facebook as clues for what he called a scavenger hunt. Police found three eggs in three public parks, and one was found behind a Motel 6, with a fifth egg found by a man and his granddaughter. Each egg contained over a quarter ounce of marijuana. Investigators linked Nicholson to the Facebook account. They also found other posts referencing drug sales. Because you want to do that on Facebook, you need to advertise. He now faces four warrants. Police stress the safety risk, especially for children, of leaving eggs filled with marijuana.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Was Easter on 420?

[Jess Hooker]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

Yes, it was.

[Tom Griswold]

That's probably the. Yeah, this is like a Batman episode with, like, the riddler is a pothead.

[Pat Godwin]

Just asking unanswerable questions.

[Josh Arnold]

I think he got the.

[Tom Griswold]

They are always in a team.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, they are.

[Tom Griswold]

They team up.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, they were in the movie. The TV show made a movie.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Just. What a. What a bad idea.

[Christy Lee]

Horrible idea.

[Tom Griswold]

He posted that. How do you think he wouldn't get caught? Was. Maybe. He was probably high when he.

[Christy Lee]

Well, Tommy's a drug dealer. I'm. You know, he's not the brightest of felons, I guess.

[Tom Griswold]

Nothing says Happy Easter like hiding eggs in a park in a sketchy hotel parking lot. Okay, thank you very much, sir. Right. Now, before we get Back to the action. We have Chick Magee across the way telling us about securing your compound from this dude.

[Josh Arnold]

Everybody else, that's right, simply safe we trust simply safe here at the Bob and Tom studios. You know, FBI crime data shows break ins are more likely during daylight hours. And what do we have right now? That's right, more daylight hours and Simplisafe. Millions of Americans enjoy the new standard in home security and greater peace of mind because Simplisafe has changed the game with active guard outdoor protection to help prevent break ins before they happen. SimpliSafe has AI powered cameras backed by live professional monitoring agents. And if Simplisafe agents see someone, they can in real time activate spotlights, contact the police, all before they have a chance to get inside your home. And there's no long term contracts or cancellation fees with Simplisafe. And monitoring plans start at around a dollar a day. And SimpleSafe has a 60 day satisfaction guarantee or your money back. So visit simplisafetom.com and this remarkable deal. 50% off a new system with a professional monitoring plan and get your first month free. 50% off, first month free. That's simply safe. Tom.com and remember, there's no safe like simply safe.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much, Chick. Coming up, we have an interesting story about an embezzler. Ever. You ever think, oh, I'm just gonna borrow 50 grand from something and I'll pay it back. Well, unless I want to get a new car. We'll find out about what happens in the world of embezzling. And interesting news from the world of penises as it meets a high art. Okay, but you'll see, we are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Josh Arnold]

It's part sports.

[Tom Griswold]

We have football on the brain, part pop culture.

[Pat Godwin]

Dennis Leary, true or false. You refuse to wear a glove with Mickey Mantle's signature on it.

[Tom Griswold]

Through be the sandlot, the Red Sox blood, the Bruins blood, they run deep.

[Josh Arnold]

Add in the best celebrity interview.

[Pat Godwin]

Robert De Niro here on the Rich Eisen Show.

[Tom Griswold]

How are you, sir?

[Josh Arnold]

Sir, Just got over a 24 hour virus.

[Pat Godwin]

The antidote is to appear on the Rich Eisen Show.

[Josh Arnold]

There you go. I would have done it earlier. And you've got the Rich Eisen show podcast.

[Pat Godwin]

There's a medicinal quality to appearing on this program.

[Chick McGee]

Follow and listen on your favorite platform.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. Hello, hello, hello. That's me on harmonica. Christy Leon drums.

[Christy Lee]

No. Hi.

[Josh Arnold]

Hi there. She's at the News desk. There's Pat Godwin. Hey, chick, do I have a song out of you today?

[Chick McGee]

Song? Whatever you want.

[Christy Lee]

He's done one.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, I did the. Yeah, the coming George. Blah, blah, blah.

[Chick McGee]

You didn't like that? I have a song called Key Lime Pie.

[Tom Griswold]

Do you really?

[Josh Arnold]

Hello, Jess Hooker. There's Josh Arnold at the I Hate Steven Singer sidekick chair.

[Pat Godwin]

Stephen Singer's limited edition brand new blue moon 24 karat gold dipped rose for Mother's Day is available now, limited quantity. Get yours [e-mail].

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, thank you very much, Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

And here's Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

And I just had a delicious. I haven't even finished it yet. A piece of key lime pie. Thank you, Jess Hooker.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, nice.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

This is a special key lime pie.

[Jess Hooker]

It's a triple decker. Yeah. There's a baked. A baked custard on the bottom, and then a cheesecake type layer in the middle and then whipped topping on top.

[Tom Griswold]

It's delightful. Thank you.

[Jess Hooker]

You're welcome.

[Tom Griswold]

Instead of a birthday cake, a birthday pie. Yeah, delightful.

[Josh Arnold]

Have you ever given anyone a triple decker?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, no.

[Chick McGee]

You ever give them the old birthday cream pie?

[Josh Arnold]

The old double decker?

[Tom Griswold]

Come on, you can do better.

[Pat Godwin]

Jess. I'm gonna try to save a piece for tomorrow. I'm at that stage of my cold where I can't. I don't taste anything.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, that's inferior.

[Chick McGee]

Probably easier that way with Jess's cooking.

[Pat Godwin]

Has it been a little off?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

She's been sick, though.

[Josh Arnold]

A complete horror.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, it was. It's delightful. Thank you very much. I have a question. I guess you. You might know this, Josh.

[Pat Godwin]

I probably do.

[Tom Griswold]

The only time you ever hear this phrase, it involves the Pope, I don't. And someone will say, oh, well, they had. I don't know if you heard about this, but, for example, Jim Gaffigan, the great comedian, had an audience with the Pope. Remember that?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, of course.

[Tom Griswold]

And Michael Bigley was there.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

But do you say that about anybody else? You ever say, oh, did you know so and so had an audience with the President?

[Pat Godwin]

Yes. You can't do.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. I was used to audience with the Pope.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, I like it.

[Tom Griswold]

Wouldn't it be good if you were the Pope? You know, at the end you'd. Your standard gag would be. You've been a great audience.

[Josh Arnold]

Nice.

[Tom Griswold]

Thanks for coming.

[Christy Lee]

Did you realize in the 13th century that one of the conclaves lasted three and a half years?

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. And a number of the Popes died before they could finish or they could vote.

[Christy Lee]

Yes, it was like.

[Tom Griswold]

It was like being in Chicago in 68. Hey, Cardinal Pizzeria was going to vote.

[Christy Lee]

For that guy when they started sequestering the Cardinals to vote.

[Josh Arnold]

I thought you were going to talk about the phrase that you only hear the. It goes. The Pope said we have to move him to another parish.

[Pat Godwin]

That happens a lot, you know.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm sorry.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, this is a.

[Tom Griswold]

Involving the world of. Well, Christie, I should point out, is sitting at the SILAC Insurance news desk. I thought perhaps we would get something that we've never gotten right on the show yet, and that is maybe doing Today in History a little early. Oh, is that okay with you guys?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, sounds good.

[Josh Arnold]

You mean like right now?

[Tom Griswold]

Sure.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay, well, I don't have the music.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, sorry. Lose it.

[Josh Arnold]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, time now for that's the Sporting Music.

[Josh Arnold]

Today in History. Today in NFL History. Tom, you have any NFL news and notes over there? I don't, no.

[Tom Griswold]

I. I have birthdays now. Do you know who this is, Ms. Hooker? James Monroe.

[Jess Hooker]

Marilyn's dad.

[Josh Arnold]

Yep, that's right.

[Tom Griswold]

He's the shock guy. Wasn't Marilyn Monroe's birth name Norma Jean Mortensen or Baker, whatever? Yeah, no, James Monroe, of course.

[Jess Hooker]

President.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Was he, what, the fifth president.

[Jess Hooker]

Washington Adams.

[Tom Griswold]

I know the president mostly associated with fifth, of course, would be Grant. What money is Drake wanted?

[Josh Arnold]

Is Monroe? Or is it Madison?

[Tom Griswold]

Unlike the 10 or Madison on the $5,000 bill.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Have you guys seen somebody put the old presidents into an AI thing and said, what would they look like if they were politicians today? No, it's really cool. They have, like, modern haircuts, suits and stuff. Like, what would they. Lincoln was wild. Yeah, because no beard, short hair.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Really?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah. It's pretty interesting.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. I mean, Taft, he was using a lot of that. Fake tanning oil, corpulent fake orange face. Okay, okay, this is an easy one. Born in 1916, Ferruccio Lamborghini.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, he makes a nice car.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah, that's Fruccio.

[Pat Godwin]

Are those overrated?

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Josh Arnold]

Yep.

[Tom Griswold]

The Lambo.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

Have you been in one?

[Tom Griswold]

You're not a car guy. You don't appreciate a fast car.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, no, no.

[Josh Arnold]

How's that going for you, by the way? You got a fast car? Are you still driving it fast? Have you realized that it's up to you to how fast the car goes? Not the.

[Pat Godwin]

Isn't it completely ridiculous to own a Lamborghini?

[Tom Griswold]

If you have as many kids as I do, sure. It's a problem if you have. Have two of them on Skateboards in the back, water skiing, water ski style.

[Jess Hooker]

But if you have a small penis, completely practical.

[Josh Arnold]

I bet. I bet there's nowhere to put groceries in a Lamborghini.

[Christy Lee]

Put them in the passenger seat. You couldn't take a passenger who runs.

[Pat Godwin]

The Target in their Lamborghini?

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, you'd be surprised if I had one. I would. By God, I do love it.

[Tom Griswold]

The fact when you go to certain places and they'll have the super fancy cars parked right out front.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, the valet guys. Yeah, the valet guys can't drive them so they actually have the people park them for them.

[Tom Griswold]

I had to valet park when I was a billboy at the Holiday Inn.

[Josh Arnold]

And now how did you sound when you were speaking to guests back then?

[Tom Griswold]

Hello, sir, I can park that car for you.

[Pat Godwin]

Was it nerve wracking or.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, it was too. Yeah. I was, I was 16 years old. I had my driver's license for about two months, but I had been driving a Volkswagen. My brother had a Beetle, so I knew how to drive a stick shift.

[Chick McGee]

But did you scratch any?

[Tom Griswold]

No, but I got in one guy's car. What do you call it when you have like the, the roof over the doorway? Well, the roof. You know the drive thru thing where you can pull up and people can get out of their cars if it's raining. The hotel port of share. Yeah, that. Whatever that is. Yeah. So people would pull up. It was a wedding at the Holiday Inn in the banquet room. They would pull up. So they get out of the car drive and I would go park it and get soaked. And I had my little half jacket on. You know the ones that come down to your waist. It was bright red.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, the, the Eisenhower ejaculate.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, the short jacket. But yes. Some guy pulled up on a beautiful, beautiful classic English sports car.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh.

[Tom Griswold]

And it was a little bit tricky. And I did the lap where I came and then I all said I couldn't get it to stop. And I came whipping around again through the thing and the guy, hey, I finally figured it out. But yeah, it was nice. I'm sorry. Back to our today in history. Let's see, we have. Oh, this isn't a good one. Saddam Hussein, born in this date in 1937. Yeah. Nothing there. No, no, no.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, we're glad he's dead.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah. Dangling from nothing. Oh, yeah. Oh, here we go. Now back to cars. Jay leno, born in 1950. Jay has something like.

[Christy Lee]

He has a Lamborghini, more than one.

[Tom Griswold]

But he's. And he's a preservationist. He's preserving lots of classic.

[Christy Lee]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

But really classic cars.

[Josh Arnold]

How do you feel about the denim shirt and the denim pants?

[Christy Lee]

How do you have the Canadian tux?

[Pat Godwin]

I think he pulls it off just fine. But maybe it's because that's what you expect from Jalen.

[Jess Hooker]

It's very in style for women right now too. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

But Jay is. Jay is really. I mean, he's really trying to preserve Classic. Classic. He drives them too, which makes it very cool. 1966, the birthday of. You know who this is, Ms. Hooker. John Daly.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, I know John Daly is. He's a golfer.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And he has his own line of clothing.

[Josh Arnold]

Really, really loud.

[Chick McGee]

Daily called Daily Wear.

[Tom Griswold]

He.

[Josh Arnold]

We heard you Pat.

[Tom Griswold]

Outrageous.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, they did. I repeated it.

[Jess Hooker]

He goes barefoot, smokes cigarettes, M's on.

[Christy Lee]

The course, you know. Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

Drinks lots of Diet Coke.

[Josh Arnold]

Crazy amounts. Ounce. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And he has a drink much like Arnold Palmer has the iced tea, lemonade. And his is like an Arnold Palmer, but it's half vodka. Let's see now. Penelope Cruz, fine actress.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, pretty girl.

[Josh Arnold]

Pretty, pretty, isn't she married to Javier Bardem?

[Tom Griswold]

She is for now.

[Jess Hooker]

Until she beats fat.

[Tom Griswold]

Now this is interesting. In 1937, the first commercial flight over the Pacific operated by Pan Am. Pan Am building in New York City. When that was. That's good. That's gone, right?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Was that Howard Hughes's airline or was it the other guys or the TWA and Pan Am at that time and they didn't know if they could fly over. Over the weather or not. And they just.

[Christy Lee]

Can you imagine being on that plane for the first time?

[Josh Arnold]

They used to have to fly a lot lower and they weren't that smooth a flight, as you can imagine.

[Tom Griswold]

Here we go. In history on the state in 1945, you know what happened to Benito Mussolini, Ms. Hooker?

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, he died.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. As they say, Benito finito. He was, yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Publicly, right?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

And then left. Wasn't he dangling for a while?

[Chick McGee]

For a while, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Lastly, the thing that makes the news, Dennis. Tito, anybody? Is it pronounced Tito or tito things. The first. He was the first space tourist paid $20 million for a seven day trip aboard the ISS.

[Josh Arnold]

Here's something I didn't know that you know Tito. Tito's vodka. Yeah, that's his real name, Tito. You know, his last name is Beverage.

[Chick McGee]

Bandito.

[Pat Godwin]

Tito Beverage.

[Josh Arnold]

Cheeto Beverage.

[Pat Godwin]

Wow.

[Josh Arnold]

Sure is. Friend of mine in Austin. That's right.

[Pat Godwin]

Interesting.

[Chick McGee]

His last name is better.

[Josh Arnold]

We're like this.

[Christy Lee]

Really.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm holding my fingers very close together.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much. Now, if you're just joining us. Thanks for joining us. We are coming to you from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. And this is the Bob and Tom Show. And we do have Christy Lee at the Silac Insurance news desk talking about history.

[Christy Lee]

We are embroiled in a debate over the number according to historians of penises pictured in a medieval tapestry.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh.

[Christy Lee]

Oxford professor George Garnett grew worldwide interest six years ago when he announced he tallied 93 penises embroidered into the Bayou tapestry which depicts the Norman Conquest of England.

[Josh Arnold]

I got 95 when I counted.

[Christy Lee]

Now, historian and bayou tapestry scholar Dr. Christopher Monk believes he's found a 94th penis.

[Pat Godwin]

I saw this in the Highlights magazine.

[Christy Lee]

Dangling beneath the man's teeth.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I thought it wasn't really appropriate. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Dr. Garnett disagrees, saying it's the scabbard of a sword or dagger. And historians academic skirmish is taking place if you want to listen to it on the History Extra podcast.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, who wouldn't?

[Tom Griswold]

Can you imagine?

[Christy Lee]

You're gonna fight over a business.

[Tom Griswold]

This guy's parents. Well, he got his Ph.D. finally. He's in the news. He's a dick counter.

[Christy Lee]

In the biome tapestry, size did matter. Garnett said. He pointed out that the battle's two leaders. Harold Godwinson does this. Who died at Hastings with an arrow in his head.

[Chick McGee]

Godwin.

[Josh Arnold]

Does this guy have an office with a secretary. And the I would assume tapestry expert.

[Christy Lee]

Are shown on steeds with noticeably large.

[Chick McGee]

In all the Godwins had large ones.

[Christy Lee]

The Duke of William of Normandy, aka William the Conqueror. And this Mr. Godwinson.

[Chick McGee]

So big they had a right king Harold Godwin. Look it up.

[Christy Lee]

Have noticeably larger endowment.

[Tom Griswold]

We would appreciate if your sides were funny.

[Christy Lee]

Is by far the biggest according to Garnett. And that's not a coincidence. So of course they made themselves bigger.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, so there they are.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. There you can see the.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, I. This is a legendary tapestry.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, sure, sure. We've all seen this.

[Jess Hooker]

I don't see one.

[Christy Lee]

I don't see any.

[Josh Arnold]

I see dogs.

[Chick McGee]

No dogs.

[Tom Griswold]

There you go.

[Jess Hooker]

Or something.

[Josh Arnold]

That looks like a.38.

[Pat Godwin]

What it absolutely does.

[Tom Griswold]

I wonder is that one of the ones that's contested where the one guy says that's a male member and the other guy says it's a scabbard.

[Christy Lee]

I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

This is silly.

[Josh Arnold]

Ridiculous pistol and some bats. Come on.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, I've also, it's. I know it's supposed to be kind of a naive drawing, but it really Is. Is the.

[Christy Lee]

Well, you can kind of see the. The twins there on the left.

[Pat Godwin]

And it's sewn, actually.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, it's. It's a tap. But it's not really very well done.

[Christy Lee]

No, they didn't have sewing machines, refrigerator.

[Tom Griswold]

No, but I mean, it looks like it was done by a.

[Josh Arnold]

But this is before fifth grader.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, it does.

[Josh Arnold]

Does remember the Tim's Vermeer documentary where everything took a giant leap forward as far as quality art goes.

[Tom Griswold]

And that's a great movie.

[Josh Arnold]

And. And the experts think they were cheating.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, I really did not see one wiener in that.

[Tom Griswold]

I think that's all just a inset of only part of the thing.

[Pat Godwin]

Sure, sure.

[Christy Lee]

You'll have to look for the 93 other ones on your own time.

[Pat Godwin]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't think I won't.

[Tom Griswold]

But if you were going to a museum and you. Someone said, hey, by the way, you know, when you get to room. Room seven, they've got the famous tapestry. You know, everyone's going to be in there looking for. For him.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, let's go ahead and count them.

[Tom Griswold]

Because everything else is so boring in there.

[Christy Lee]

I love his museum.

[Tom Griswold]

And the. The. The. The. All the doens are all going, yeah, I got the dick room again today. Everyone goes there, they run in, they whip through all the rooms, get to the one where you count the penises, and they go get a couple postcards and hit the cafeteria.

[Pat Godwin]

A hell of a scenario going on.

[Josh Arnold]

Don't you have a song about penises and art hearts and things?

[Chick McGee]

How do you spell physique?

[Josh Arnold]

P, H, Y.

[Chick McGee]

Hold on.

[Tom Griswold]

PH.

[Chick McGee]

What?

[Josh Arnold]

Ph.

[Christy Lee]

You have it under Greek.

[Josh Arnold]

Hold on.

[Chick McGee]

I have a new genius keyboard. Guess what?

[Jess Hooker]

Don't you get here at like I.

[Christy Lee]

Q, U, E. Little show.

[Jess Hooker]

Prep something.

[Chick McGee]

Ready to go. Thank you, people who can spell. Tom, do we have time?

[Josh Arnold]

Sure.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Put it. You should put that under Greek. That would be easier to find.

[Chick McGee]

Christie, zip it. Well, Tom already gave me a snide remark.

[Josh Arnold]

You're gonna have to text an apology.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, you are.

[Josh Arnold]

I hope you're. Oh, no.

[Tom Griswold]

If you're gonna sing, make it funny.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, Jesus, I love this song.

[Chick McGee]

I am a true man of the world. I stand her with my flag unfurled. I'm a gorgeous melting pot of youth humanity. But one physical flaw is such a blow to my vanity. I have a cute English nose like the Swedes I'm the leanest. I have huge Austrian pecs But a Greek statue penis I'm hung like ancient art. That's what came between us. You like my Roman hands, but not my Greek statue penis. Oh, I'm no Norse God, neither groa nor shoa. I have a pint sized package like the javelin thrower. Go ahead, take a peek at my teeny weeny Greek fuzzy. Have a strong Irish lover and a Japanese like genius, no accent, a big American gut. But a Greek statue. Beans, salty Brazilian nuts and a Greek statue Venus. A Greek physique.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, there we go.

[Chick McGee]

It took so long to get to a kids.

[Pat Godwin]

Well worth the wait.

[Tom Griswold]

Can you imagine that? You got two scholars arguing over this.

[Christy Lee]

Can you imagine listening to a podcast about it?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, we've got medieval warfare, but we got penises involved. Oh, now. Now I'm gonna tune in.

[Christy Lee]

That's a sword.

[Josh Arnold]

Welcome to Paint Drying.

[Tom Griswold]

I call it Where's Where's Willie? It's kind of like Where's Waldo? Where's the Willie? Well, thank you very much, Pat. Now we have what coming up, Christy?

[Christy Lee]

Coming up, we have embezzling in the news. We have a guy who bought his own stolen car. We have Loch Ness news for you, Josh.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, boy.

[Christy Lee]

And we have two old people doing some crazy things. And we have the Rock and Roll hall of Fame folks have been announced.

[Pat Godwin]

More old people doing things.

[Christy Lee]

Yep. There you go.

[Tom Griswold]

They got them. They got. They got the new inductees ready to go now?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, they do.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. I can't wait to hear who's in it right now. I'll remind you, over the weekend, I went down to Java House.

[Christy Lee]

Did you? On your bike?

[Josh Arnold]

On your bike?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, on my bicycle. This portion of the Bob and Tom show is brought to you by Java House. The official coffee of the Bob and Tom show and the official refreshments of the Bob and Tom show, including iced tea and various sports drinks. What do they call them, hydration drinks, energy drinks, et cetera from Java House. Revolutionizing the world of drinks and coffee and tea. Because you don't put it in a Keurig machine. You don't have to have a percolator. Nope. You peel and pour. I got one right here. This is, for example, a Colombian medium roast cold brew. And as you can see, it looks like a Keurig cup, but it isn't. It's a concentrate. A concentrate of coffee. You just add hot water to this thing and you're ready to go. You can have this thing ready in just a few seconds, and you can have it on ice, you can have it hot, whatever you want. That's what Java House is all about. Revolutionizing coffee as you drive. Revolutionizing coffee at home. And I would like to thank Office H2O for our new water system which works perfectly with the Java House peel and pour. We're able to get rid of those big five gallon jugs of water. Now we have a. What is it like a reverse osmosis thing? We get nice fresh water out of it, hot or cold. And I just made some hot tea this morning courtesy of Java House. So break up with your brewing machine and break up with your brewer. Get [e-mail] the promo code is Bobandom. Spell it out. B O, B, A, N, D, T, O, m. That'll knock 25% off your order. Javahouse.com promo code. Bob and Tom. All one word. Get 25% off your online order. Java House, the official coffee. Java House, the official refreshments of the Bob and Tom Show. Thank you very much. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios and this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Josh Arnold]

Thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom show portions of the show brought to you by Champion Windows.

[Chick McGee]

This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. Christy Lee at the SILAC insurance news desk. There's Pat Godwin. Hello, Josh Arnold.

[Pat Godwin]

Hi, Chick.

[Josh Arnold]

Jess Hooker over there. Hi, I'm Chick McGee. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Think O'Reilly Auto Parts. For all your car care needs. Get the parts and service you need fast from the professional parts people at O'Reilly Auto Parts. Hello, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello, Chick. I'm just looking over the Kentucky Derby. Some of the preliminary races. Do not bet on the horses, blumpkin. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

That is.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, that sounds like it.

[Tom Griswold]

Up.

[Jess Hooker]

Don't look it up.

[Christy Lee]

Okay, yeah, you know what it is?

[Pat Godwin]

Plug it up. You'll see that you've probably done it.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, no, just the ones dumpster fire in the fourth race. But it reminds me, and I forget the actual facts of this, so, Christy, you're gonna have to refresh my memory.

[Christy Lee]

Help me.

[Tom Griswold]

Didn't you get into a confrontation with a horse?

[Christy Lee]

Yes. What happened Again, I attend polo. It's no secret. I enjoy going to polo in the summer.

[Pat Godwin]

It's immediately defensive.

[Christy Lee]

Yes. And I may have had a glass.

[Tom Griswold]

Or two of how many chukkers do they have?

[Christy Lee]

Depends on the heat and depends on the crowd. Usually five to six. And at the end of the polo match, I was out on the. The. On the field, if you will. And pitch.

[Tom Griswold]

What do they call it?

[Christy Lee]

Field is what I called it. And, well, I think she cleared that Up.

[Josh Arnold]

We're not supposed to ask questions during this story. Go ahead, Chris.

[Christy Lee]

I went up to this horse who I had been around many, many times.

[Pat Godwin]

Thought you were friends.

[Christy Lee]

Thought we were friends. But for some reason he wasn't friendly that time and smacked me in the face with his snout and left me with quite the. In fact, it's still a problem to this day. Hit me pretty good in the eye. Socket.

[Pat Godwin]

Check. What did the horse say when asked. Why did you. Why did you hit Christie in the mouth?

[Josh Arnold]

Because that's where the noise was coming from.

[Pat Godwin]

That's what the horse said, Christy.

[Josh Arnold]

That's what the horse said.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, yeah, whatever. Laugh it up.

[Tom Griswold]

You have a song about that, Christy.

[Chick McGee]

Do you remember the name of the horse?

[Christy Lee]

No, I do not. Oh, I don't think the horse had a name. I don't know.

[Chick McGee]

The horse didn't have a name.

[Josh Arnold]

The fulcrum of the joke, if you will. Yes.

[Chick McGee]

Chrissy went to a polo party with the polo ponies all around There was wine and cheese and high nose and a DJ was spinning new sounds Christy had a few whines and was feeling no pain Having fun and getting buzzed she went to nuzzle a cute little horsey but he wasn't feeling it Just because. Head butted at a party by a horse with no name and now, now her eyes blackened, inflamed at the party she couldn't remember or her name and there ain't no pills for to give you no pain Everyone. Poor Christine.

[Christy Lee]

I learned my lesson. I don't get close to horses anymore.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, well, we'll have a complete list ready for the derby this weekend.

[Christy Lee]

I'll take you guys to polo this summer if you'd like to go. We should all go. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Field trip. Field trip. Field trip.

[Christy Lee]

Show Polo.

[Pat Godwin]

I am gonna.

[Tom Griswold]

Do they. Do they tell you the names of the horses? Is it like a program?

[Christy Lee]

No, they don't tell you the names of the. Well, sometimes they announce the riders. I'm. Sometimes she'll announce the horse as well.

[Tom Griswold]

Do they have an announcer?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah. Or two horses. We have two announcers.

[Jess Hooker]

Like a play by play.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

We'll be right back after this.

[Jess Hooker]

What's a chucker?

[Christy Lee]

A chucker is like one.

[Tom Griswold]

A length of a quarter.

[Christy Lee]

Length of like a quarter.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, okay, okay.

[Tom Griswold]

But it's a funnier word.

[Jess Hooker]

I like that word. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

However, there is a. A chucker. That's a famous discharge.

[Pat Godwin]

The chucker.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, hey, we got that new horse, 50 Shades of Hay.

[Christy Lee]

And they run so fast. Yeah, they have to Change horses. Every chucker. So the horse.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

It's wears them out.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, it does.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, that chuckle.

[Tom Griswold]

Where.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, yeah, it will. Chucking to wear you out.

[Jess Hooker]

Is that where they go in Pretty Woman? They go to a polo match?

[Christy Lee]

They do.

[Jess Hooker]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

I'd like to be the announcer, maybe chicken. Could you do your polo announcer?

[Josh Arnold]

Hey, thanks a lot, Tom. We're here at the polo match.

[Tom Griswold]

He's a tribute to our president. This one's called Mayor a Lago. It's very clever.

[Pat Godwin]

It's very clever.

[Josh Arnold]

Tribute to the funny stuff over there. Tom.

[Christy Lee]

I've actually had to do this.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, you have.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh.

[Christy Lee]

Because one of the announcers didn't make it to one of the events, so I had to do it. I know nothing about polo.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Doesn't matter. You make stuff up.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, you do. It's great.

[Jess Hooker]

That's fun.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Hey, the Rock and Roll hall of Fame is announced.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey, I hear straw.

[Tom Griswold]

She cheaper.

[Josh Arnold]

There it is.

[Christy Lee]

The artists that will be inducted into the hall of Fame this year are Chubby Checker, Joe Cocker.

[Josh Arnold]

Come on, baby.

[Tom Griswold]

And Chubby's still alive, right?

[Jess Hooker]

Is he?

[Christy Lee]

I think so.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Isn't he is.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I think he is.

[Christy Lee]

Chubby Checker. Checker.

[Josh Arnold]

Wait a minute. Both feet is what? That was Josh's question. I can't. For Shelby.

[Tom Griswold]

Check. Yeah, he's actually not that corpulent.

[Pat Godwin]

No. No, but.

[Tom Griswold]

And wasn't that. Was he a Dick Clark creation?

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, he was.

[Tom Griswold]

There was Fats Domino, and then they.

[Chick McGee]

Wanted to continue actually named him. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

I could just see Dick explaining it to him. Oh, you see my Dick Clark.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. And. And Chubby really essentially only had the one hit.

[Christy Lee]

Right. He just redid.

[Josh Arnold]

True.

[Pat Godwin]

He had let's Twist Again.

[Josh Arnold]

Thank you.

[Christy Lee]

That's the same song.

[Pat Godwin]

No, it's sequel.

[Tom Griswold]

Cool. Is it like Godfather 2 where it's. It's actually better?

[Pat Godwin]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Pat Godwin]

And I don't think I'm in the rare boat of. I still think the first one's better than the second Godfather.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah. Well, you can't have one without the other. You could have one without. Never mind.

[Christy Lee]

Chubby Checker, Joe Cocker, Bad Company.

[Pat Godwin]

Come on.

[Christy Lee]

Cyndi Lauper, Outcast, the White Stripes and Sound Garden.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Bad Company should absolutely be in there.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, it should. Good. Outcast. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

The induction Outcast is a bunch of guys with weird names.

[Jess Hooker]

Just two guys.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

It's only two Boy and Andre, 3,004 hits.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, no, no.

[Josh Arnold]

Andre.

[Pat Godwin]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

Andre's somewhat of a. An actor now as well.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, really?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, he's been in some stuff.

[Christy Lee]

Those who did not make it this year include Mariah Carey, Fish, Billy Idol, Joy Division, Slash, New Order.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, Fish hasn't finished the song that they're nominated for. They're still playing it.

[Christy Lee]

It'll be Black Crows, Oasis and Manana. Manana Mana.

[Tom Griswold]

Menudo.

[Christy Lee]

No, it's M a N a Mana.

[Josh Arnold]

That's Manana Mana.

[Jess Hooker]

Bread.

[Christy Lee]

M a n a. It is Bread.

[Chick McGee]

That's a Spanish version of bread.

[Christy Lee]

It's a Spanish bread in.

[Tom Griswold]

Have they had any hits in the United States?

[Christy Lee]

I don't know, Tom. I'm not big on my.

[Jess Hooker]

I mean, I'm excited for the White Stripes to be in. I love them. The White Stripes?

[Christy Lee]

Not familiar with their music.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, sure.

[Chick McGee]

Big fan.

[Josh Arnold]

Ball and Biscuit. Come on now.

[Tom Griswold]

The White Trash should be in that. The great Edgar Winter. White Trash.

[Christy Lee]

What?

[Tom Griswold]

There's an out. There's a great album called Here we Go. Road Work. Edgar. Winner's Original. White Trash. Great band. Highly recommend.

[Jess Hooker]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Edgar Winter's a musical genius.

[Josh Arnold]

Is that available on the album or is it just on the. The cone?

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, no. Mock it if you must. They've nominated a band. There's no way they've nominated a band. No one on earth has ever heard of Who Mana.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, well, we're not.

[Jess Hooker]

Just because the six of us haven't heard of them doesn't mean that.

[Tom Griswold]

But it's the Rock and Roll hall of Fame. Not.

[Jess Hooker]

That's true. It should be.

[Josh Arnold]

You have trouble with this?

[Christy Lee]

The Music hall of Fame?

[Josh Arnold]

I guess every time. Time. Maybe we should just start realizing that the Rock and Roll hall of Fame in this room does not exist. That way. It wouldn't upset him.

[Christy Lee]

Do that.

[Tom Griswold]

Look at him. There are several dozen members that any Rock and Roll programmer. Programmer. Has never heard of that are in the Rock and Roll hall of Fame. They need to change the name of it. That's all. I'm just glad Chubby Checker's still alive.

[Christy Lee]

What would you change it?

[Tom Griswold]

The Music hall of Fame. That if they want to. If they want to have bands in it that have nothing to do with rock and roll.

[Pat Godwin]

It's a cool place to go.

[Tom Griswold]

It is great. I've been. Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

And they have live DJs.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, really?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

That's fine.

[Pat Godwin]

Somebody in there's broadcasting.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, that's fun.

[Pat Godwin]

You can see how Small Prince was.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

That's what everybody said. All the clothes.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. They've got a mannequin and you go, whoa.

[Josh Arnold]

Really tiny.

[Christy Lee]

You wore really high heels all the time.

[Josh Arnold]

Tiny people.

[Christy Lee]

Platforms.

[Tom Griswold]

That is tight.

[Christy Lee]

Teeny little guy.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, now, coming up, we have a variety of delights, and I hope you can stick around and participate. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Josh Arnold]

Thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom show this morning.

[Chick McGee]

Catch any part of the show you.

[Josh Arnold]

Missed later Today on our YouTube channel. Welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. At the Silac Insurance news desk, it's Christy Lee.

[Christy Lee]

Hello.

[Josh Arnold]

There's Pat Godwin.

[Chick McGee]

Hi, Chick.

[Josh Arnold]

Hello. Jess Hooker.

[Chick McGee]

Hello.

[Josh Arnold]

There's Josh Arnold.

[Pat Godwin]

I have a retraction, but go on standby.

[Josh Arnold]

We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Jeff Oskar's here. I'm Chick McGee. Hello, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Josh, I want to hear the retraction.

[Pat Godwin]

I sort of scoffed at the idea that Outcast is now in the Rock and Roll hall of Fame. I think for me, they were one of those bands that was so overplayed that I forgot the genius. And their stuff really is cool. So, yeah, they probably do have a place in there.

[Tom Griswold]

Kind of a.

[Josh Arnold]

Kind of a throwback, a couple of them.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

Man, your sound was like.

[Pat Godwin]

You couldn't escape.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey, yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

When that came out, great.

[Tom Griswold]

Everywhere.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, yeah. But. But when you listen to it again, you go, oh, yeah, no, that there's a reason you couldn't escape it. It was so fantastic.

[Tom Griswold]

And Chubby Checker, I guess he had said he'd prefer getting in when he was alive.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, he is dead.

[Chick McGee]

He is gone.

[Tom Griswold]

No, Chubby Checker is alive.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, then why.

[Christy Lee]

Why did you say.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, so he. So he's getting his wish.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, he had said. He had said, I don't want to be dead in 85. And I get in finally. So.

[Christy Lee]

Well, let's. I mean, he's in, I guess now.

[Tom Griswold]

I guess they figured that the song, the Twist has. They've. They've calculated. It's been played, whatever, a billion times. It's one of the most played songs in the history of music.

[Pat Godwin]

And the Fat Boys did a cover, didn't they?

[Josh Arnold]

They, you know, a billion times is nothing anymore. After you.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, no, I. I was not giving an actual number.

[Josh Arnold]

Billions and billions.

[Jess Hooker]

It is that. Does that song have a dance that went with it?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, Right.

[Pat Godwin]

A twist.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, but which came first?

[Pat Godwin]

I think the Twist came first.

[Jess Hooker]

Okay. And then they just applied it to the song.

[Tom Griswold]

It did.

[Josh Arnold]

I thought.

[Christy Lee]

I thought the song spurred the dance.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, you guys were there. You would know better.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I. This was. I was just. I was a baby sperm.

[Josh Arnold]

So.

[Pat Godwin]

So this is Comedy.

[Tom Griswold]

Raise your hand like this, we'll know.

[Josh Arnold]

Wow, he's making friends today.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I, I, I love songs that tell you how to do the dance.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, that one doesn't really.

[Chick McGee]

Just says, come on, baby, let's do it.

[Josh Arnold]

Let's do the Twist.

[Tom Griswold]

Doesn't he say something like, round and around and around, around and around.

[Pat Godwin]

There we go.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, that's clear as mud.

[Pat Godwin]

I mean, the earth is doing that.

[Jess Hooker]

So do you like the Hokey Pokey?

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Jess Hooker]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

It reminds me of TV shows where they tell you the premise of the show during the. In that jingle at the beginning. Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

You like to know what's coming.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Like that new show, the Pit that I'm watching.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

There's no music in the whole show.

[Pat Godwin]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

Except the beginning when they go blood and guts and people and stuff.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, yeah, that's a good thing.

[Tom Griswold]

There's a guy dying and this chick screaming. And that's not a guy's got rats and. Okay. You'll see.

[Jess Hooker]

Have you guys ever been country line dancing?

[Pat Godwin]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Jess Hooker]

You have?

[Pat Godwin]

Yes. Oh, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

It's so fun.

[Pat Godwin]

Had a real good time.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Are you familiar with the Cupid Shuffle, Tom?

[Tom Griswold]

The Curly Shuffle? I'm familiar with.

[Jess Hooker]

That's a fun one.

[Christy Lee]

Apparently the Twist is actually a cover. Did you know that?

[Chick McGee]

What?

[Christy Lee]

The Twist by Hank Ballard and the Midnighters came first in 1959.

[Pat Godwin]

I knew that was cultural appropriate.

[Christy Lee]

Chubby Checkers cover of the song was released in 1960, which catapulted both the song and the associated dance craze to widespread red face.

[Tom Griswold]

I sure hope Hank owned the rights.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, I want to hear the original.

[Chick McGee]

I think so.

[Pat Godwin]

It was a dance craze before the song.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Was it a country type song?

[Christy Lee]

I don't know. I'm just reading it for the first time. I was not aware.

[Jess Hooker]

You're making that assumption because his name is Hank.

[Chick McGee]

That's what I thought.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

No, I am.

[Christy Lee]

Definitely not.

[Tom Griswold]

Hank would not have been doing country in those days unless it was Hank.

[Pat Godwin]

Aaron, the one exclusive exception to that rule.

[Tom Griswold]

Hank Ballard is the other exception to the Hank rule.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, okay. Interesting.

[Tom Griswold]

What a great name. Hank Ballard and the Midnighters.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I bet they were great.

[Pat Godwin]

Boy, that sounds like a country in Western bay.

[Tom Griswold]

It is not.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Wonder who. Let's see who wrote the Twist?

[Jess Hooker]

I mean, I see them in their Western shirts and their hats.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Hank Ballard wrote the Twist we played.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, he did?

[Tom Griswold]

It's described as an up tempo 12 bar blues.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Chick McGee]

Chubby's in the hall of Fame.

[Pat Godwin]

For covering.

[Christy Lee]

Cover song. Song.

[Chick McGee]

The twist.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, he made it famous.

[Josh Arnold]

You don't have any problem with Chubby Checker being a Hall of Fame?

[Tom Griswold]

Not at all. I have trouble with Patty Smith being in the hall of Fame.

[Josh Arnold]

What's wrong with that?

[Tom Griswold]

Her only hit was a Bruce Springsteen song that she walks through.

[Chick McGee]

She does a nice job with that number.

[Tom Griswold]

Anybody could have done that.

[Jess Hooker]

She's got a good book.

[Tom Griswold]

Great books will get you in the hall of Fame.

[Christy Lee]

Wrote. I read that book too, Jeff.

[Pat Godwin]

She has a good cookbook about baking.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Patty cakes. Oh, well worth the effort.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know.

[Chick McGee]

Even sick.

[Pat Godwin]

You're a riot.

[Jess Hooker]

No one's safe.

[Josh Arnold]

I think that was the first time you've ever lashed out at Jess during one of your tirades.

[Tom Griswold]

Her album reminds me of the horse I'm betting on in the derby. Maplethorpe's Fist. That's a good one.

[Chick McGee]

You know, it's not just cakes.

[Pat Godwin]

You know, it always works its way in, though. It doesn't it?

[Christy Lee]

Yes, it does.

[Pat Godwin]

It's not just cakes that Patty cooked.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, Patty melts.

[Pat Godwin]

There were sequels.

[Chick McGee]

Hamburger patties.

[Tom Griswold]

Wait a minute, Wait a minute.

[Josh Arnold]

Can't be comedy.

[Tom Griswold]

The death of comedy.

[Josh Arnold]

It just can't be.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Is it?

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Josh Arnold]

Why am I not laughing?

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Christy, is anything else happening at the Silac Insurance News?

[Christy Lee]

Not really.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey.

[Christy Lee]

Scientists say even the most advanced AI systems have trouble reading clocks and calendars.

[Josh Arnold]

Can't tell time or numbers.

[Christy Lee]

The University of Edinburgh team tested AI models on time related questions using images of clocks and calendars and found AI correctly read clock hand positions less than a quarter of the time.

[Tom Griswold]

Sounds like today is high school students.

[Christy Lee]

Especially struggling with Roman numerals and stylized hands.

[Pat Godwin]

America on a map.

[Tom Griswold]

I agree. By the way. I despise Roman numerals. I will never have a watch that I like wearing a watch. Yeah, I like. I like to look at it and go I. But that's from years of being in radio. I look at a clock and I. I see it in a different way. But if it's got Roman numerals, I'm out.

[Christy Lee]

Even the best models miscalculated calendar dates about 20% of the time. Researchers said improving AI's ability to interpret time could benefit scheduling appointments, autonomous robots and accessibility tools.

[Josh Arnold]

That's right. Are you the one that can't tell?

[Christy Lee]

He doesn't like digital either.

[Josh Arnold]

What? Clock? Can't you. You don't care for digital? Digital.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I, I don't like watches that have Roman numerals. But I, I.

[Josh Arnold]

But does this clock, this analog clock up here on the wall, does that bother you?

[Tom Griswold]

No, I love. I look at that analog.

[Christy Lee]

He doesn't look at the digital one.

[Pat Godwin]

The clock he hates the most is biological.

[Tom Griswold]

Good point. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Tick and just keep.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Except for the. Except for the expansion of the penis. Everything else, it's a gravity thing. Now I'm more of a showrunner, a grower.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, that's really interesting.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, it's like a double bonus.

[Christy Lee]

Understanding analog clocks and calendars still challenges AI requiring spatial awareness, context, and basic math.

[Tom Griswold]

But does. Does AI need to have a watch?

[Christy Lee]

Does it need an analog clock?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah. Who's asking? AI what time?

[Pat Godwin]

AI knows that time is just a construct.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, that's true.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

You. Yeah, Your. Your chat GTP doesn't have to do the old joke. What time is it? Oh, it's a freckle past a hair. Did you ever get that one when you were a kid?

[Josh Arnold]

No, it's a hair. Hair past a freckle. Not a freckle past a hair. There's nothing you can't screw up.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm doing it in daylight time. You're doing standard time. You got it wrong.

[Josh Arnold]

I stand corrected.

[Tom Griswold]

Patty Smith in the hall of fame, my ass.

[Josh Arnold]

You gotta let that go, man. It's gonna eat you a lot.

[Pat Godwin]

Did you see Patti Smith's book about her dog? No. Knickknack Patty Whack.

[Chick McGee]

Give the dog a bone.

[Pat Godwin]

I haven't read that one. That's pretty good. Is that comedy?

[Josh Arnold]

And that's what you arrived at?

[Chick McGee]

You sat over there the whole day?

[Josh Arnold]

That's right. Boy, oh, boy. Give the dog a bone. She liked the bone.

[Tom Griswold]

You know what she liked?

[Josh Arnold]

Like what she like?

[Tom Griswold]

She would like jewelry.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Or a beautiful rose. There's one right over there. That's gonna last forever because it's dipped.

[Josh Arnold]

Second time this morning. You've got me. You got me on June. You got me on jewelry.

[Tom Griswold]

So close.

[Josh Arnold]

Jewelry.

[Tom Griswold]

She liked the jewelry. Of course, she also likes the roses From I hate stephensinger.com. stephen Singer Jewelers. Here you go. This is the perfect Mother's Day gift. And it's a limited edition blue moon Rose rose. It's an actual real rose dipped in 24 karat gold. And it's of course, the perfect Mother's Day gift. And it's running out quick. We talked with Stephen last week and he was just saying, this will not be restocked. Supply is limited. Last year, they ran out of last season's rose. So I'm urging you to act today. And by the way, it comes in a beautiful box with a beautiful card, and the shipping is free.

[Josh Arnold]

Stephen does not sell used roses. He. A secondhand rose.

[Tom Griswold]

Is that a reference to a song?

[Chick McGee]

Secondhand Rose from Gypsy.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I didn't realize we were having a funeral.

[Josh Arnold]

Funeral.

[Tom Griswold]

Funeral for comedy.

[Josh Arnold]

Today.

[Tom Griswold]

There's that song. The Day the Music Died. The Day that Comedy Died. I'm sorry, Stephen. I apologize.

[Josh Arnold]

This one will be free.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I know what I want to mention. If the mother in question happens to be. Now, Josh, your. Your mom is still alive, right? A lovely lady.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And she would enjoy one of these roses. But now, let's just say you had a mom who was also your lover. Okay, this is where I say you get her the beautiful At Last bracelet. Real diamonds. It's gorgeous. It's a great value. And you have that dangling from the.

[Pat Godwin]

Rose, and that guarantees sex better.

[Chick McGee]

What's the angle?

[Tom Griswold]

Josh? Josh. With the way a gentleman would say it.

[Josh Arnold]

Hook it up.

[Tom Griswold]

You'll be writing me a discreet with a thank you note on the Monday following Mother's Day. With a little wink.

[Pat Godwin]

I see.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you, Tom. I certainly appreciate everything you've done.

[Josh Arnold]

Thank you for the bundling last night.

[Tom Griswold]

It was. It was rough and vigorous and. Yes, vigorous.

[Josh Arnold]

A rogering.

[Tom Griswold]

A vigorous rogering, that's right. You know where that comes from, Ms. Hooker? No, no, it's the. The Diary of a Virginia Gentleman.

[Christy Lee]

Okay, now, that was. That. You can talk about.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, we can talk about that one.

[Christy Lee]

We can talk about written.

[Tom Griswold]

Written hundreds of years.

[Josh Arnold]

What about the Patty Smyth book?

[Christy Lee]

Patty Smith.

[Josh Arnold]

Whatever.

[Tom Griswold]

In any event, go to. I. I hate. Excuse me. I don't need a defense here. Go to ihd.com. thank you. And check it out. The roses are great. The bracelets are awesome. The earrings are terrific. And you can always get Steven's lifetime guarantee. In fact, you get it automatically, and shipping is free. Now, when we come back, Christy, do you have something important and. Or interesting to say?

[Christy Lee]

Yes, I do.

[Tom Griswold]

What would it be?

[Christy Lee]

You'll have to wait to find.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, being teased, are we?

[Christy Lee]

Ah, we have news of Loch Ness.

[Josh Arnold]

Tease it.

[Christy Lee]

We have it.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, we got a cool fish, a fishing story, and we've got a Loch Ness story coming up for you, Josh. The fishing thing I think you're going to find very, very interesting. All right, we are in the O'Reilly Auto Part Studios, and this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. Our really, really big shoe. Hi.

[Tom Griswold]

Good Evening, you all very good. Doing all the contemporary hosts, here's Tom Griswold. Thank you very much.

[Josh Arnold]

Thank you, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

For those of you who think the MC5 is five dudes with mics. No, let's see now we have Christy.

[Josh Arnold]

Lee or a sandwich at McDonald's.

[Pat Godwin]

The MC5.

[Josh Arnold]

MC5.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, they've got the. Did you hear? You didn't. Oh, you weren't here for this.

[Pat Godwin]

Is there a new sandwich?

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, well, kind of. It's not a sandwich anyway.

[Josh Arnold]

Where the hell are the rats? They said they were bringing.

[Chick McGee]

They were great.

[Christy Lee]

That was in the story. If you'll recall, McDonald's announced it's adding McCrispy strips to the menu. They'll be released alongside the all new creamy chili dip, A combo that McDonald's said is here to stay.

[Pat Godwin]

Wow.

[Christy Lee]

It'll be starting up May 5th.

[Jess Hooker]

Not a sandwich.

[Tom Griswold]

These are. No, they're chicken fingers, essentially.

[Christy Lee]

But they're basically.

[Tom Griswold]

But I. I'm hoping that they have a mascot. The chick mentioned this MC Crispy. Don't you think, like a rapping a wrapping chicken. Hey, I'm MC Crispy, man.

[Pat Godwin]

Whoa. I like MC Crispy.

[Josh Arnold]

MC Crispy sounds a little bit like he's from Italy. A little bit.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, it's an Italian or. It's a recipe for the.

[Josh Arnold]

I think I just saved your life.

[Pat Godwin]

Is this a re. Release, if you will.

[Tom Griswold]

It's now being permanent.

[Pat Godwin]

Okay.

[Christy Lee]

But they also. They have. I don't. I. Oh, my God. McDonald's still has not provided an update chick on the much anticipated return of the snack.

[Tom Griswold]

She wants to call you a name.

[Pat Godwin]

I like the snack wraps.

[Josh Arnold]

What name do you ladies want to call me?

[Jess Hooker]

I can't say it on the air.

[Tom Griswold]

McRap. I mean, is that the obvious rap? Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

No. We're talking accidentally has crap in it.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, sorry.

[Pat Godwin]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

You can't do it. Yeah, that's. I'm sorry.

[Christy Lee]

The McCrispy are new. They have a. They're coated with crispy golden brown breading bursting with a bold new black pepper flavor.

[Jess Hooker]

First, chicken.

[Tom Griswold]

What? Andy said. Christie's husband.

[Christy Lee]

No. What do you say?

[Tom Griswold]

Crispy. My crispy strips for me.

[Pat Godwin]

A crispy strips for me. No, Andy, we're saying crisp with a P, not crispy. Yeah, we know that you're Christy.

[Tom Griswold]

It doesn't matter. Don't you. What about yours? Day and micro.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know whether to be offended or amused. I'm not sure which way I'm going. Going with it.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, because your version of Andy and mine are vastly Different.

[Josh Arnold]

Mine is very put upon.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, yes.

[Josh Arnold]

He's beaten down.

[Tom Griswold]

Mine is something I haven't looked. Mine is. He is.

[Pat Godwin]

What?

[Tom Griswold]

Is he pleasuring his wife on a regular basis.

[Josh Arnold]

Is that right?

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Jess Hooker]

What does the real Andy feel about this?

[Christy Lee]

I don't know. We don't talk.

[Tom Griswold]

He's too busy watching. Watching IndyCar stuff to actually pay attention to this.

[Chick McGee]

Is he back from this trip? Is he back, back?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, she got back yesterday morning. Thank you. I'll actually talk about this a little bit. He went out to Lincoln, Nebraska.

[Josh Arnold]

Crazy time in Lincoln.

[Christy Lee]

Drinking for a Lincoln grand opening of the Unser museum. Really cool.

[Josh Arnold]

And I guess all things unser. Oh, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

I'm gonna kick you here.

[Tom Griswold]

There's a bat over there. Can I get it for you?

[Josh Arnold]

What are you talking about?

[Tom Griswold]

Make the first hit. Get the first hit right in the middle of the face. There's a lot of blood.

[Josh Arnold]

A whole week.

[Christy Lee]

There were two days. It was two days. A Scottish drink manufacturer is pioneering a world first by maturing casks of whiskey deep below the surface of Loch Ness. The company, called Dam Hayen, is named after the Gaelic word for deep.

[Josh Arnold]

Did you say dumb hands?

[Tom Griswold]

Dam Hayen Domhan. D O M Domhan.

[Christy Lee]

The submerged casks 702ft underwater were put down there on Valentine's Day, aiming to create a unique maturation environment influenced by the locks, pressure, temperature and stillness.

[Tom Griswold]

And they're leaving out, of course, the monster. Monster pee.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, that's going to naturally be in there. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Of course. You can imagine the monster scats in.

[Josh Arnold]

There and many, many monster babies.

[Tom Griswold]

I bet the monster scat can't get through the barrels the pea leeches in.

[Christy Lee]

Based in Sterlingshire, Domhan hopes that the underwater conditions will enhance the flavor profile of the whiskey in ways that traditional storage methods cannot replicate.

[Tom Griswold]

Really?

[Christy Lee]

The company's inaugural Release boasts a robust 50.55.5 ABV, or as they call it in Scotland, breakfast. You say 55.5%.

[Josh Arnold]

So it's over 100 proof. Yeah, technically.

[Pat Godwin]

Okay.

[Christy Lee]

Enthusiasts and experts alike agree, or rather are eager to see how the depths of Loch Ness might impact the character of the whiskey.

[Tom Griswold]

It's a great idea.

[Josh Arnold]

Why don't you just drink rubbing alcohol?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, no, but I mean, this is. This, I assume, will be a collectible. People visiting. Oh, I'm going to get a bottle of this. That's a. I think it's a very.

[Josh Arnold]

Josh, you've been there to the lock.

[Pat Godwin]

I have.

[Josh Arnold]

Is it like bigger than we think or huge?

[Pat Godwin]

Long. Yeah. Yeah. Yep. And really Pretty. And it was cold. I stepped in it.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, the locks. Cold and deep. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. I think he's in the water 700ft deep in that. Where they're putting the barrels. That's pretty.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, that's where the monster lived. Plenty of room for a monster.

[Christy Lee]

Sure.

[Pat Godwin]

What if the. What if Nessie gets a hold of it and we just sing him walking down the sidewalk drunk?

[Josh Arnold]

Nessie.

[Pat Godwin]

Nessie has been spotted on land, which is really astonishing.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, really?

[Christy Lee]

I didn't know that.

[Josh Arnold]

Tell me more.

[Pat Godwin]

I don't know how old Nessie would be.

[Chick McGee]

Boy, that photo was out.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, I don't think that there. There must be a family of. There's not one.

[Christy Lee]

Right.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Although turtles live to be, you know, what, 250, 300 years old.

[Pat Godwin]

Wonderful mystery.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, our friend Edwin McCain portrayed Nessie last week.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, he did.

[Tom Griswold]

If you were watching the Masked Singer.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. He was unmasked on Wednesday night and.

[Tom Griswold]

Such a great guy. If you get a chance, go see him. He will not be wearing the Nessie suit. When he does. I'll be. And his other great songs for you this summer. He's on tour. He's going to stop by. I. I talked to him on Friday. We all did.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

No, but I. After the show. After the show. I had too.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

When you talk about things, you often mistake us for being no.

[Tom Griswold]

1.

[Josh Arnold]

That's true.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, what do you mean by the word mistake? You mean intentionally? I'm sorry. No, I could be, too. After the show. After I. He's going to definitely come in.

[Pat Godwin]

So good. Always good to see him.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, if he comes in after the show, that's not. We're going to be off the air.

[Tom Griswold]

All right. I have a question. We were talking about the Twist because Chubby Checker is in the Rock and Roll hall of Fame. Deservedly. And he. His main song, of course. The Twist. Is the Peppermint Twist also a song, or am I?

[Pat Godwin]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

How does that go?

[Josh Arnold]

It's a different song, though. I don't even think it sounds like the Twist. But it's based on the twist. Twist.

[Pat Godwin]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

All right. Wait.

[Josh Arnold]

The Peppermint Twist.

[Pat Godwin]

Exactly.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Jess Hooker]

There's a bar. I remember that.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I did, too.

[Josh Arnold]

It was.

[Jess Hooker]

Spent most of my childhood in that kitchen.

[Josh Arnold]

Peppermint Twist. Bully bullies. Remember those bars, Chevy?

[Pat Godwin]

It was a candy. It was essentially a candy cane without the Peronis. Right. It was just a straight.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Rod.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

Like a barber's rod.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes. I often refer to candy cane as. It has Peyronis.

[Pat Godwin]

Boy, that's severe peyronis too.

[Josh Arnold]

That's severe.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. You're gonna shoot off into yourself.

[Jess Hooker]

I just learned about this because of the commercial ran on CBS Sunday morning.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, the crooked carrot or whatever.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah. I had to look and he was like, is it supposed to bend that way? And I said, what's this a commercial for? And it was, it was.

[Christy Lee]

It's amazing.

[Tom Griswold]

And doesn't Peroni sound like a sandwich?

[Jess Hooker]

Yes, it does. It sounds like pierogi panini.

[Tom Griswold]

Sounds like an Italian version of a nice sandwich.

[Pat Godwin]

It does sound delicious.

[Jess Hooker]

I wonder if it feels delicious.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, there's a bone I've kind of want.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, I don't think the hook is helping.

[Josh Arnold]

Josh, we've talked about this on the air. I tried to tell you. It's just, it tastes just like a finger in your mouth. It's just, it's just a part of my.

[Tom Griswold]

Time to move on. Once again, if you're just joining us, this is the Bob and Tom show. We're coming to you from the O'Reilly Auto Part Studios. And I look across the room and I see Christy Lee is at the Silac insurance news desk. Christy, what else is happening?

[Christy Lee]

We have quite a few anglers in the room. Authorities are urging you anglers to decapitate any invasive snakehead fish you find.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh.

[Christy Lee]

The sharp toothed predator, part fish, part snake, is spreading across the U. S and threatening native species.

[Tom Griswold]

You've seen one of these things?

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, we got it.

[Christy Lee]

Snakeheads can breathe air and survive out of the water for days.

[Pat Godwin]

I've never seen one in person.

[Josh Arnold]

What about snakes? We got to call them snishes. Snake fish. Snish.

[Christy Lee]

Angela Sokolowski. Angela Sokolowski of the Missouri Department of Conservation.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, ask her when she bowls.

[Christy Lee]

Says the best methods are gut it, behead it, bag it, trash it.

[Pat Godwin]

Okay.

[Jess Hooker]

Also don't eat it.

[Christy Lee]

Officials warn to double check before killing snakeheads because they can be mistaken for bow fins, which I'm not familiar with. With the key difference, however, snakeheads have a longer anal fin and a more snake like body. Snakeheads likely arrived through the fish market or aquarium trade as they believe how they got likely got here.

[Josh Arnold]

Do you hear? Bow fins have a longer anal fin.

[Tom Griswold]

The snake kids. Excuse me. The snake heads have the longer anal. There's a photograph of one. Here they are.

[Christy Lee]

There you go.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, my gosh. It's pretty.

[Tom Griswold]

It's huge. Huge. But it looks like a huge snake. They are. So I think it's ugly. It's scary looking.

[Jess Hooker]

Ah, it looks like a giant Slime.

[Tom Griswold]

The one we're looking at is what, three, four feet long?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And they can live it for three or four days out of the water.

[Pat Godwin]

Isn't that wild?

[Christy Lee]

That is wild.

[Josh Arnold]

That guy has no idea who his wife is or what his kids names are right there.

[Pat Godwin]

And look at that smile.

[Josh Arnold]

Look at that.

[Chick McGee]

Looks like a young Dustin Diamond.

[Tom Griswold]

We sure does.

[Pat Godwin]

Does he does look like Dustin Diamond?

[Tom Griswold]

Got those. You got some nice quality fishing shades on.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. That's right. Good hat. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Can you imagine? You're fishing, you pull that thing out of the water.

[Pat Godwin]

It's. I mean, it's no uglier than a gar.

[Tom Griswold]

But they didn't show them when I was looking at it yesterday. The mouth full of those really sharp teeth.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

And this was from Missouri. So you've never seen one?

[Pat Godwin]

No, I have not seen one.

[Tom Griswold]

But I mean, it's just kind of weird that they can live. They can live. They survive because they can live without very odd water for several days.

[Pat Godwin]

Very odd.

[Tom Griswold]

And they. They're actually urging you to cut their heads off and then put them in a pla. They want him dead.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You have to cut its head off. Show the head to its wife.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. I mean, are they. Are they. Are they trying to sit.

[Chick McGee]

She wakes up with it.

[Christy Lee]

They're sending a message.

[Tom Griswold]

This is the thing. Are they going to send a message to the other fish? Now, do you. You carry when you. When you're fishing? I. You have a knife at all times, right?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, the knife on boat. On the boat, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

So is it big enough to lop off a fish head?

[Jess Hooker]

That's like a machete.

[Pat Godwin]

I know that it's. No, it would take.

[Christy Lee]

You'd have to saw.

[Pat Godwin]

You'd have to saw. And that. That can't be pleasant. So, you know, you could keep it in the live well, kill it on land or.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know, like a pocket knife.

[Pat Godwin]

It's more like a. Oh, boy. A serrated.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, okay. Yeah, like a steak knife.

[Pat Godwin]

But it folds and it's. Tactical knife. Oh, yes.

[Christy Lee]

Okay, we're gonna switch gears here.

[Tom Griswold]

What have you got?

[Christy Lee]

An Arkansas bank employee is accused of stealing more than $240,000. Investigators say Ms. Heather Pankey worked at the First national bank of Commerce.

[Tom Griswold]

How does she spell her last name?

[Christy Lee]

P A N K E Y. Pankey.

[Tom Griswold]

Panky or Panky.

[Pat Godwin]

My. A girlfriend of mine used to work with her.

[Christy Lee]

Did she?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

My baby knows the heather Panky.

[Tom Griswold]

My baby knows the heather. My baby knows.

[Pat Godwin]

That's A good song.

[Tom Griswold]

I love that song.

[Christy Lee]

The investigation began when a suspicious transaction showed up on a deceased customer's account. According to authorities, Ms. Panky, or Panky, however you're saying it accessed multi, rather multiple customer accounts. She allegedly transferred funds into a joint account she shared with her grandmother. The total, stolen from at least eight customers, top $241,900 in a court statement.

[Tom Griswold]

So. So Grandma can get the blame now, huh?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. In a court statement, Panky said she, quote, borrowed money from a couple of customers, stating she thought they wouldn't miss.

[Tom Griswold]

It because they're dead. Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

She now faces charges including financial identity fraud, theft of property and forgery.

[Pat Godwin]

Essentially a victimless crime.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. The money's just sitting there.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Why is it big? What if the. What if the family needs the money?

[Pat Godwin]

They should have. They should have gotten it.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, Granny died and they got to go through court.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, if they're not, I say if it sits there for longer than two weeks.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, really?

[Jess Hooker]

A lot longer than that.

[Josh Arnold]

Ten days.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

All right. With the name Panky, though, it's like your last name is Suspect. Hi, I'm Lynn. Suspect. I'm the suspect. Okay.

[Pat Godwin]

Remember Stuart Pankin, the great actor?

[Chick McGee]

Of course. From Mannequin.

[Pat Godwin]

He's in Mannequin?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh.

[Tom Griswold]

What's he most famous for?

[Pat Godwin]

Not necessarily the news, Right? Arachnophobia, honey. We shrunk ourselves.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, they moved on.

[Tom Griswold]

Is he still up with us? Is he still around?

[Chick McGee]

He does commercials now and stuff. Infomercials.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh. Stuart Pank for shoes.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, thank you very much.

[Chick McGee]

I don't know why I know that.

[Tom Griswold]

Coming up, I've got something. I got a story for Christy. All right. You were mentioning your fondness for woodpeckers.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. We have three different kinds of woodpeckers in our backyard.

[Tom Griswold]

And I've got woodpeckers in the news.

[Josh Arnold]

Careful of Splinter.

[Tom Griswold]

Uh huh. Thank you. But you've got something for me. I understand.

[Josh Arnold]

Raycons. Everyday Earbuds. They're here, people. They are perfect of makeup. Perfect. Interesting. Out of the ordinary. Something she wouldn't buy for herself. Gift for mom. If she's hitting the gym or taking one of those many phone calls, she uses her Raycon earbuds. Think of that. Their latest model, by the way. 32 hour battery life, multi point connectivity. Lets you pair with two devices at once. Mom will never ask you to help her with Bluetooth again because Raycon practically syncs itself. And Raycon has quick charge function. Just 10 minutes of charging, 90 minutes of battery Also, Raycons have active noise cancellation and they come in all the colors. Raycon offers a 30 day happiness guarantee return policy, all with crystal clear sound. Go to buyraycon.com and you get 20% off site wide everything on their website right now. Raycon 20% off site wide. All you have to do is go to buyraycon.com tom that's buyraycon.com tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Coming up, woodpeckers in the news. It's very exciting. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios and this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Josh Arnold]

Thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom show this morning even though we're not doing too much to look at. You can also watch the show on our YouTube channel. Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. At the Silac Insurance news desk, it's Christy Lee.

[Christy Lee]

Hi.

[Josh Arnold]

Pat Godwin's here.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, Chick.

[Josh Arnold]

There's Jess Hooker.

[Tom Griswold]

Hi.

[Josh Arnold]

Hello. Josh Arnold.

[Pat Godwin]

Hi, Chick.

[Josh Arnold]

We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. I'm Chick. Hello, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

I've been wormholing it over here.

[Christy Lee]

All right, now what? He's wormhole.

[Josh Arnold]

Hold it up.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, I'll tell you in a second. I, I found this story just for you because you were talking about how you're, there's a lot of noise at your place from the woodpeckers.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And the, and the, is it pileated?

[Christy Lee]

Pileated woodpeckers. Red belly woodpeckers.

[Tom Griswold]

The pilated one is huge and it looks like just like woody Woodpecker.

[Christy Lee]

Correct.

[Tom Griswold]

The first time I saw one I thought it was a joke.

[Christy Lee]

And they have red headed woodpeckers, not to be confused with the pileated woodpeckers. I'm learning all about woodpeckers.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, here's a little bit of something I found for you.

[Christy Lee]

Residents of a Seaside, Massachusetts town say a woodpecker is destroying their cars.

[Pat Godwin]

Whoa.

[Christy Lee]

Rockport locals have dealt with broken car windshields and side mirrors for several weeks. Resident Janelle Favolaro told NBC News the vandal responsible for Damaging upwards of 25 cars is a woodpecker. Ron McGill Zoo Miami's communications director said it's currently peak mating season for birds.

[Pat Godwin]

I see.

[Christy Lee]

Which could explain the woodpeckers aggressive behavior.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm horny.

[Christy Lee]

If they're seeing the reflections of themselves, they think it's a competitor.

[Tom Griswold]

Ever had a dog do that?

[Jess Hooker]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Your dog comes on the corner, sees himself.

[Christy Lee]

Maybe that's why the one, the pileated woodpecker attacked my sliding glass door the other day.

[Josh Arnold]

No. No, that's demonic possession. There's something in that house for a demon now.

[Tom Griswold]

So I got thinking about it and what I. I love these groups, these group words for, you know, the most famous one, I guess a pot of whales and that sort of things. And I didn't realize these are in some cases, hundreds of years old.

[Christy Lee]

Okay, turn.

[Josh Arnold]

The terms.

[Tom Griswold]

The terms. Yeah. For example, does anyone know what a group of woodpeckers is called?

[Pat Godwin]

No.

[Josh Arnold]

A. Clancy.

[Tom Griswold]

Just. Just as Val. It. A descent of woodpeckers or a drumming of woodpeckers. Or a Gatling of woodpeckers.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah. That must have come after the gun.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I. Yeah, I just thought they sound like. And then I looked. A group of cardinals is called a conclave of car.

[Chick McGee]

So timely.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, you sucked us right into that, didn't you?

[Tom Griswold]

Do you know what? You know, I'll go around the room. Jeffrey, turn that mic on. Do you know what you call a group of crows?

[Pat Godwin]

Murder.

[Tom Griswold]

A murder of crows. That's one of the most famous.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Chick McGee. Owls.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

A parliament of owls.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, I like. Me too. That sounds so.

[Pat Godwin]

Shouldn't it be a mystery of owls?

[Josh Arnold]

Parliament Funkade? Alec.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

A hoot of owls. A hoot of owls. Turn your mic off. Okay. Completely undeserved.

[Tom Griswold]

Let's see. Ms. Hooker.

[Jess Hooker]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

We've done this one before. Flamingos. A group of flamingos is called.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Something.

[Jess Hooker]

It's kind of gay, right?

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, it's fabulous is what you're. Well, thinking about.

[Tom Griswold]

It's called a Flamboyant science. Correct.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Very good. Now this one's. This one's interesting. On land, a group of.

[Josh Arnold]

Me.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. You'll get this. On land, a group of geese is called a gaggle. A gaggle of geese in the air, flying in a wedge. They're called an annoyance. No, a skiing.

[Christy Lee]

That's a tough one. I didn't know that.

[Josh Arnold]

How are you spelling that? Skein?

[Tom Griswold]

S K, E, N S K, E, I, N. Oh.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, that'd be a good starter word for.

[Tom Griswold]

For wordle.

[Pat Godwin]

This should be called the traffic jam because all the honking. All the honking.

[Tom Griswold]

Turn your mic. You had a lot of time.

[Pat Godwin]

I was gonna let Jeff say it.

[Tom Griswold]

You had a lot of time to review that joke.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And you still went forward with it.

[Pat Godwin]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Is there somebody out there with a car horn that sounds like a goose honking? Heavy. That'd be great. Great.

[Tom Griswold]

We've done this one before. Do you know what a group of parrots is?

[Pat Godwin]

Called Christie.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, a cracker.

[Tom Griswold]

A pandemonium.

[Christy Lee]

I did not know that.

[Tom Griswold]

This is a really good one. A group of eagles is called a Henley.

[Jess Hooker]

A Noble.

[Tom Griswold]

A Henley of Eagles. That is so good that. That. That you. You've recovered from the.

[Pat Godwin]

Keep your. Michael.

[Chick McGee]

From what?

[Tom Griswold]

From. You kept interrupting Christy with trying to get the fact that the Godwin family has become.

[Chick McGee]

Well, I was very proud of the fact that my family. I come from Kings Godwinson. I kept trying to bang it over.

[Tom Griswold]

Chapter 10 kings on hard Times.

[Chick McGee]

That's true. Actually.

[Tom Griswold]

This one is weird. A group of starlings is called a murmuration.

[Christy Lee]

Murmuration.

[Pat Godwin]

Very odd.

[Tom Griswold]

A murmuration of starlings.

[Josh Arnold]

Just starlings, huh? Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

And then a group of prostitutes, of course, is a gurgle.

[Jess Hooker]

I thought he was going to do comedians.

[Josh Arnold]

What do you call a group of comedians?

[Tom Griswold]

A bitter of comedians. Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

How do you get that show? Are you kidding me?

[Tom Griswold]

Anyone know. Anyone know a group of vultures?

[Christy Lee]

Vultures.

[Tom Griswold]

This is a.

[Christy Lee]

This is very.

[Tom Griswold]

A wake of vultures.

[Christy Lee]

Close.

[Tom Griswold]

And that's appropriate.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

That's if they're feeding.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, I never would have gotten this next one. Hawks. A kettle of hawks.

[Pat Godwin]

I wonder what that's about.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. These are such beautiful.

[Josh Arnold]

You've never had hawk soup?

[Pat Godwin]

I haven't.

[Josh Arnold]

Pretty good. Not bad. Not bad at all.

[Tom Griswold]

These. This. These next two are great. Anyone know Penguins on Land?

[Josh Arnold]

Penguins on Land.

[Chick McGee]

A waddle.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

Are you right?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Yes, that is correct. How about Penguins in the water Parade?

[Josh Arnold]

A drowning one swim.

[Tom Griswold]

A raft of penguins. Whereas ducks on the water, which is my favorite purple song. A paddling of ducks. If they're in flight, a team of ducks. Ah. Now, this is the weirdest one. A lamentation of swans.

[Pat Godwin]

Very odd.

[Josh Arnold]

Really Makes no sense.

[Tom Griswold]

That's not. Yeah, that's. That's kind of always.

[Christy Lee]

You don't see a lot of swans together. Ever.

[Tom Griswold]

And then, of course, a descent of woodpeckers.

[Jess Hooker]

Do they mate for life?

[Josh Arnold]

Swans?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I think so.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, they do.

[Josh Arnold]

They get their necks entangled.

[Pat Godwin]

Sometimes they have to walk around like that.

[Christy Lee]

You turn left. No, you turn left.

[Josh Arnold]

No, a lot of cases. That's why they're. Well, we're stuck together. Let's.

[Chick McGee]

Who else mates for life?

[Christy Lee]

Mallard? Ducks.

[Josh Arnold]

Otters.

[Chick McGee]

Otters. Don't call me otter.

[Tom Griswold]

Don't call me otter. Okay, there's a few more of these and I'll be done with it. A.

[Josh Arnold]

A rafter of ceiling joists.

[Pat Godwin]

Is that right?

[Christy Lee]

Bats. A rafter of bats.

[Tom Griswold]

We should probably cut right there. That's Such a funny joke.

[Josh Arnold]

That's pretty good.

[Tom Griswold]

A rafter of turkeys. I've never heard that before. A chime of rens.

[Josh Arnold]

Did you say chime?

[Pat Godwin]

Ah, listen to the rens.

[Josh Arnold]

The rens are sounding especially good this morning.

[Tom Griswold]

A bouquet of pheasants. Yeah. Okay. A tiding of magpies. These are all so much. These are all so nice.

[Josh Arnold]

I can't tell one bird from another unless it's like magpies.

[Pat Godwin]

Kind of look like a crowd.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

A cardinal or something like that.

[Jess Hooker]

Are they really a blue jay?

[Christy Lee]

You know what a blue jay.

[Josh Arnold]

I know what a cardinal is about it.

[Tom Griswold]

A karaoke of canaries.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh.

[Josh Arnold]

Because they sing.

[Tom Griswold]

That's. That. That's a lie.

[Josh Arnold]

That's a hat.

[Pat Godwin]

That's a. Guys, that's not true. Guys, I was making a joke.

[Josh Arnold]

I just want to tell everybody that.

[Tom Griswold]

It was a turd fest of pitch pigeons again.

[Josh Arnold]

Where they do crap everywhere, don't they? I have heard that they don't. They have no way of controlling their bowels no matter what they're doing. Birds in general.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, really?

[Josh Arnold]

They can't. They don't know.

[Pat Godwin]

And the white is pee and the darker is poop.

[Christy Lee]

And it all comes out together.

[Josh Arnold]

It all comes out together. They don't know. They don't know when it's going to happen.

[Pat Godwin]

What?

[Josh Arnold]

Jeff?

[Pat Godwin]

They don't have a sphincter. Oh, okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Is that right?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Is this from examination or.

[Pat Godwin]

We have Burt. Oh, you got birds.

[Christy Lee]

Do you. They do have birds.

[Pat Godwin]

Yep.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

Like in a cage.

[Christy Lee]

Yep.

[Pat Godwin]

Yep.

[Tom Griswold]

How about.

[Chick McGee]

Sound real happy.

[Tom Griswold]

How about a group of.

[Josh Arnold]

How about.

[Tom Griswold]

What would you call a group of serial killers?

[Josh Arnold]

I would say a murder documentary.

[Christy Lee]

Very good. Chick, please.

[Tom Griswold]

Killing it. Yeah. A graveyard of serial killers. I don't know. Thank you so much for joining us. Us, we are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts.

[Josh Arnold]

We get to come back tomorrow, right?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, we do.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

You can reach us Bob [e-mail]. this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Josh Arnold]

For a complete copy of the Bob and Tom Show Contest rules, go to bob&tom.comcont contest-rules or just scroll down to the bottom of the page and see Contest rules. This is the Bob and Tom Show. Bravo TV star Lala Kent holds nothing back.

[Christy Lee]

There's been so many times where I'm.

[Josh Arnold]

Like, I apologize that I said that.

[Christy Lee]

But that wasn't meant for you to hear.

[Josh Arnold]

Feel you there.

[Christy Lee]

How fun would it be to bring in some Bravo liberties and make our own bracket iconic? All right, I'll take Dorinda you take Sonia.

[Josh Arnold]

Sonia is who I wish I could be.

[Tom Griswold]

You and me both.

[Christy Lee]

I cannot be someone in the program. What's PTO pay time off.

[Pat Godwin]

See, you never had a real job.

[Jess Hooker]

Give them Lala.

[Christy Lee]

It is nothing but honesty.

[Josh Arnold]

You guys know follow and listen on your favorite platform.