The BOB & TOM Show - April 29, 2026

Summary

The BOB & TOM Show – April 29, 2026

Overview

This episode of The BOB & TOM Show blends its signature mix of comedy, pop culture banter, original songs, audience letters, and a rotating panel of regulars riffing on news, everyday life, and each other. Key themes today include Tom's recent wedding and wedding cakes, unique world records, weird news stories (including babies born on airplanes and the "sperm racing championship"), and plenty of musical comedy. The panel also handles listener letters about social awkwardness, relationships, and embarrassing moments, capping off with comedian Ali Breen's “Sexy Time” advice segment.

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Table of Contents

1. Main Cast and Tone
2. Featured Comedy Songs
3. Key Discussion Points
4. Notable Letters and Listener Interactions
5. Memorable Moments & Quotes
6. Segment Highlights with Timestamps
7. Ali Breen's Sexy Time: Advice & Laughs
8. Closing Vibes & Recurring Jokes

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Main Cast and Tone

The show’s core panel for this episode includes:

• Tom Griswold (the wry, slightly neurotic main host)
• Chick McGee (acerbic, quick-witted sports/news guy)
• Christy Lee (news, pop culture, voice-of-reason)
• Josh Arnold (comic sideman, dry & playful)
• Pat Godwin (musical parodist/guitarist)
• Jess Hooker (food/comfort, relatable everywoman)
• Ace Cosby (occasional interjections, running “sidekick” gags)
• Ali Breen (comedian, “Sexy Time” advice, joining virtually)

Tone: Casual, quick, slightly edgy, loaded with callbacks and ribbing. Self-referential humor and parody songs are central. No topic is too weird or mundane for their comedic microscope.

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Featured Comedy Songs

1. "King Chuck" / "King Chump" (Pat Godwin)

(01:33 – 03:34)
A musical roast of King Charles covering royal quirks, British breakfast, and family scandals.
Key lyrics:
"King Chump, his teeth and ears look big and funny. Will they fit on stamps and money?"
Memorable moment:
Pat’s summary of Charles’ “love for Camilla” and royal family baggage gets the group in full-on giggles.

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2. "O de Brody" – The Dog Song (Pat Godwin)

(20:54 – 22:17)
Pat’s tribute to his dog Brody, with escalating complaints about messes, property destruction, and the cost of pet parenthood.

• "Piss, piss, piss, and a crap, crap, crap..."

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3. "Go Through Your Phone" (Pat Godwin, phones & relationships)

(39:44 – 42:19) A song about snooping through your partner’s phone and discovering more than you bargained for. Key lyric:
"If you love me, will you let me go through your phone? ... Who’s the big dude in just a Lakers jersey, sitting on the bed, his johnson hanging way down low?"

4. "IKEA Meatball Lollipop" (Pat Godwin, IKEA news)

(96:46 – 97:42) Parody of "Lollipop" riffing on IKEA’s meatball-flavored lollipop announcement.

5. "Christy Lee's Husbands" (Pat Godwin, closing tribute)

(157:44 – 159:15)
A playful song about Christy Lee’s multiple marriages, now celebrating her love for Andy.

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Key Discussion Points

Tom Got Married!

• Tom eloped over the weekend on a beach in the rain (18:49, 87:48).
• Group discusses the meaning and luck of rainy weddings, and the merits of low-key vs. ceremony-heavy nuptials (19:00, 24:10).
• Jess Hooker bakes Tom and Kelly a white raspberry wedding cake, recreating JFK & Jackie Kennedy’s famous cake (55:08, 87:48).

Royal Family Roast & British Bits

• Extended parody and riffing on King Charles’ visit to New York, preferences for breakfast, and UK/US cultural overlaps (03:34-07:01).
• Banter about royal events, "The Crown," and Tom’s movie confusion (06:14, 06:53).

Babies Born on Planes

• A listener letter and news story about multiple recent airplane births spark rants about airline policies for pregnant women, the absurd logistics of mid-flight deliveries, and crowd-sourced solutions with shoelaces and passenger blankets (07:05 – 08:06, 105:29 – 106:25).

Sperm Racing World Championship

• Oddball coverage of a real competition: international sperm racing for cash and men’s health awareness (69:32 – 74:01, 159:28 – 162:44).
• Plenty of “motility,” “cream room,” and “submission” puns:
  • “Is it a sprint or a marathon?” (71:00)
  • “On your mark, get set... oh, sorry, that was too quick.” (161:20)

Listener Letters & Phone Number Nostalgia

• Whole cast realizes they barely memorize numbers anymore (24:49 – 26:24).
• Nostalgia for “cool” phone numbers and locker combos (25:35 – 26:11).
• Parallels drawn between analog and digital memory—“does anyone remember numbers anymore?”

Embarrassing Swimwear Stories

• Tom’s wedding pants malfunction (“had to wear [wife’s] underwear backward”), and a listener’s see-through soccer shorts at a city pool (22:42 – 23:53).

Weird Washroom Technology

• Deep dive on public restroom quirks: jump ropes on coat hooks, wandering doors, and germ paranoia (28:01 – 33:26).
• Extended bit about antique cloth roll hand towels, Dyson Airblade, and strange solutions to hover-paranoia.

World Records & Age-Defying Feats

Oldest Female Unicyclist: 69-year-old rides Nutcracker show and sparks clown costume jokes (81:53 – 84:35).

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Notable Letters and Listener Interactions

• Wedding Pants Letter (22:24): Tom’s linen pants story prompts listeners to admit to their own wardrobe fails.
• The Jump Rope in the Restroom (28:01): Listener reports odd public bathroom discovery; cast invents conspiracy theories and hovers over hygiene hacks.
• On British Weddings/Luck (23:57): Listeners write in to confirm Tom’s “rain=good luck” theory.
• Phone Memory Epiphany (24:49): Letters prompt cast to discover their atrophy of number-memorization skills.
• Bullying Confessions (48:49): The group has a heart-to-heart about former bullies, school memories, and how some antagonists wind up selling insurance.
• Piggly Wiggly & Carnac Memories (52:12): Old-school grocery store nostalgia gives way to Johnny Carson joke remixes. “Describe Kermit’s wedding night.”

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Memorable Moments & Quotes

On New Traditions:

"Drunks with tubas... I like Tom's contention that we replace vuvuzelas with drunks with tubas as a stadium tradition."
— Josh Arnold (13:03)

On Gym Rings:

“Is there oil for these wedding rings? Cocoa butter, olive oil, maybe butter would work...”
— Tom Griswold & crew (09:15-09:43)

On Forgetting Why You Entered a Room:

“How often do you say to yourself, 'OK, why did I walk in this room?' ...You have to go out the doorway and come back in to reset your brain."
— Chick McGee (79:35-79:44)

On Sperm Racing:

“How do they pin the numbers on them?”
— Jess Hooker, deadpan (70:26)

“If a sperm breaks its tail, Christy, they have to shoot it.”
— Tom Griswold (74:42)

On Relationships and OnlyFans:

“I haven’t been on OnlyFans much... I’m probably going to get off it.”
— Ali Breen (146:24), announcing her priorities have changed with a new boyfriend.

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Segment Highlights with Timestamps

01:33 – 03:34:
King Chuck/King Chump parody song and British breakfast banter.

20:54 – 22:17:
"O de Brody"—Hilarious original song about the pitfalls of getting a puppy.

28:01 – 33:41:
Jump rope in public restrooms, hover paranoia, germs, and bathroom hardware rants.

39:44 – 42:19:
"Go Through Your Phone" song—Pat Godwin’s funniest relationship confessional yet.

55:08, 87:48:
Tom's wedding cake: Jess Hooker makes the JFK-Jackie white cake, panel taste-test (and wedding cake nostalgia).

69:32 – 74:42, 159:28 – 162:44:
Sperm Racing World Championships—an actual event, with the panel making it weirder at every turn.

96:46 – 97:42:
IKEA meatball lollipop parody song.

105:29 – 106:25:
Baby born on a Delta flight.

140:28 – 151:33:
Sexy Time with Ali Breen:

• Awkward FaceTime flashing
• Should she be upset her boyfriend’s college kid is moving home?
• Is a “guy’s golf vacation” code for something sus, or just bro time?

157:44 – 159:15:
Christy Lee’s Husbands—a sweet/funny marriage song for Christy and Tom.

---

Ali Breen’s Sexy Time: Advice & Laughs

(140:28 – 152:35)

Highlight Letters:

• Shock FaceTime: Woman disturbed when online guy unexpectedly flashes her during a video call.
  • Panel (mostly) agrees it’s forgivable—“he backed off, honest mistake,” but Tom suspects it’s his pattern.
• College Dropout Moves Back In: Woman resents boyfriend’s adult child coming home.
  • Panel: "Kids come first! If that’s a dealbreaker, speak up so he knows you’re unreasonable," quips Josh.
• My boyfriend had a thing with a guy in college—should I worry?
  • Shrugs all around: "Yeah, probably a little gay, but people are complicated."
• Is my 50yo boyfriend’s golf trip suspect?
  • Panel: "Golf bro-trips are real, not a cover-up!"

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Closing Vibes & Recurring Jokes

• References to past marriages (“What’s one more?” re: Christy Lee’s 4th wedding)
• "Motility" and sperm endurance gags
• Running building banter (locks, offices, deliveries—Chick’s Amazon rants)
• Food obsession: Wedding cake as celebration, comfort, or “bad day cake”
• Musical throwbacks: "My Boy Lollipop" as unwelcome earworm
• **Panel lovingly mocks Tom’s quirks about grammar, habits, and over-explaining
• **Self-aware sum-ups ("Today has been the most obscure, weird, off-track show we've done in a long time." – Tom, 113:04)

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For the Full Experience

• Best Entry Point: Start at [01:33] with Pat’s King Charles parody and ride through the first 30 minutes for the tone-setters.
• Top Comedy Song: "Go Through Your Phone" [39:44]
• Weirdest News: Sperm Racing Championship [69:32, 159:28]
• Realest Confession: Tom’s wedding pants mishap [22:24]
• Sweetest Moment: Jess Hooker’s JFK-Jackie Wedding Cake for Tom (and the cast’s reverence for wedding cake) [87:48]
• Need Advice? Check Ali Breen’s Sexy Time [140:28-152:35]

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BOTTOM LINE:
Come for the parody songs and scathing British royalty jokes, stay for the friend-group energy, lightning-quick riffing, completely random news stories (with a side of sperm racing), and real talk about love, food, and being human (and weird).

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(This summary omits all commercial breaks, promos, and recurring ad copy.)

Transcript

[Pat Godwin]

Focus features in Blumhouse present Obsession.

[Tom Griswold]

When I have a crush on a

[Chick McGee]

guy no one knows, be careful.

[Tom Griswold]

I wish Nikki loved me more than anyone in the entire world. Who you wish for obsession is 96% fresh on rotten Tomatoes.

[Chick McGee]

I love you so, so, so, so much.

[Tom Griswold]

It's blood soaked nightmare fuel.

[Chick McGee]

What kind of spills you put on her?

[Tom Griswold]

You have been warned.

[Pat Godwin]

Obsession.

[Tom Griswold]

Rated R under 17 animated without parent only theaters May 15 with special engagements in Dolby.

[Josh Arnold]

It's time to ref refresh your yard

[Pat Godwin]

during Spring Backyard Days at the Home Depot.

[Josh Arnold]

Get low prices guaranteed on propane grills starting at $179 like the next grill

[Pat Godwin]

3 burner gas grill.

[Josh Arnold]

Or get $50 off a select Weber spirit grill. And bring big flavor to your backyard. Then set the scene with Hampton Bay string lights that bring it all together. Shop Spring backyard days for seven days

[Chick McGee]

at the Home Depot.

[Josh Arnold]

Now through May 6th. Exclusions applies to homedeboy.com Pricematch for details.

[Chick McGee]

It's the bob and tom show.

[Tom Griswold]

King Shark

[Pat Godwin]

Charles was a young prince he never thought he'd be king finally ruling England at the age of 73 King Chuck the queen was his mama Lucky Chuck she used the Oxford comma Born in the royal palace Hands never callous King Chuck now that is Mama's gone I hope he doesn't fail. What exactly did he do as the

[Josh Arnold]

fancy prince of Wales?

[Pat Godwin]

King Chump his teeth and ears look big and funny Will they fit on stamps and money or in the royal palace? Hans Maverickalis King Shock. Shock the queen she had her corgis Prince Andrew had his orgies he's wild that brother and a king chump On Epstein Island Duke got reign dad Prince Harry moved from good out to Hollywood King Chump Chuck Chuck Charles loves the polo ponies King chump chunk and dressing up for ceremony he wears a kilt please don't stare King chomp chomp he's not wearing underwear finally gets to rule cause he's got the the family jewels

[Tom Griswold]

King shop

[Pat Godwin]

He married Diana they had a castle and a villa but all the time he dreamed about the homely one Camilla Couldn't wait to get his hands on Corny Chuck oh no. Said he'd like to be with Tampa the royal palace has the royal fallacy so bold it won't be long we'll have to write another song King.

[Chick McGee]

Hello. Hello, Hello. There's caller there. Hello. Hi. From the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios, it's the Bob and Tom Show. Christy Lee at the news desk.

[Christy Lee]

Hello, Chip McGee.

[Chick McGee]

Hello there's Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hey, Chick.

[Chick McGee]

Yes, hello, Josh. Arnold. Hi.

[Josh Arnold]

I'd like to think King Charles just heard that.

[Chick McGee]

I hope he did.

[Josh Arnold]

Maybe it went off in the double tree. He's staying in.

[Chick McGee]

Yes. Probably be nice up early for the free continental breakfast.

[Josh Arnold]

Right, right.

[Tom Griswold]

Years of continental. You know, I should say.

[Chick McGee]

Could you pass the.

[Tom Griswold]

The devil.

[Chick McGee]

No, not deviled eggs. By maybe a boiled egg?

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah, they're. Bloody waffle maker isn't working.

[Tom Griswold]

Although they might boil this meat. It's delicious and juicy.

[Chick McGee]

What is it? Bangers and mash. Right?

[Josh Arnold]

Ah, yes, little bubbles and squeak.

[Chick McGee]

And for breakfast they like mushy peas on toast and beans. How would you like that?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, no.

[Josh Arnold]

Sliced tomatoes.

[Chick McGee]

Yes. Yeah. There's Ace Cosby. Hello, I'm Chick. Hello, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello, Chick. King Charles in town, if you will. New York City in the USA Today.

[Josh Arnold]

They're gonna go to see a Broadway show.

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, they're not.

[Christy Lee]

I don't think so. They have a foundation fundraiser tonight and they're going to the 911 memorial this morning.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, okay.

[Chick McGee]

Social secretary.

[Christy Lee]

Yes, I am.

[Tom Griswold]

Really? You're a big fan, are you?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, she's getting.

[Christy Lee]

Oh my gosh. My husband and I had this debate yesterday.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, wow.

[Josh Arnold]

About whether to care.

[Christy Lee]

Yes. Did you see exactly.

[Pat Godwin]

Did you see King Charles where some kid came up that kids on the Internet that does all the impressions of Jeff Goldblum and a whole bunch.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, he's good.

[Pat Godwin]

Something.

[Josh Arnold]

Matt Friend.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Works for CNN or something.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

He comes up to Prince Charles, he goes, I'd like to try out my impression of you on you. And he does it and Prince Charles goes, try harder.

[Josh Arnold]

Which I bet Matt Friend loved.

[Tom Griswold]

Honestly.

[Chick McGee]

Well, it could have been try harder or it could have been off with his head.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, there was.

[Christy Lee]

There wasn't anymore.

[Tom Griswold]

Was a time. Yeah. But it would have been off with his head. Which will be featuring by request the. The fabulous Tim Wilson tribute to then Prince Charles. Yeah, that'll be. That'll be coming up. Certainly. I'm a big fan of that piece.

[Chick McGee]

So you didn't watch like Lady Die and Chuck Wedding? You didn't watch any sort of royal activity? You didn't. The Queen's whatever the hundredth year, whatever the hell it was 75th of June, the big Duins in England. You don't care.

[Tom Griswold]

But I did say I enjoyed the movie the King's Speech.

[Chick McGee]

You did.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, I did too.

[Christy Lee]

I did too. That was good.

[Chick McGee]

I did not.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, were you bored by it?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, it was a little bit too well, I'm a stutterer, too.

[Josh Arnold]

You kept yelling.

[Chick McGee]

I didn't. Yeah, I kept yelling. Shut up.

[Josh Arnold]

I was gonna say you kept yelling. Hey, spit it out already.

[Chick McGee]

Spit it out. Yeah, that happened.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Anyway, don't we have a tribute to the King's Speech? I can't remember.

[Chick McGee]

Wasn't it. It's a parrot stuttering.

[Tom Griswold]

Why do I remember? You're catching me off guard. We'll have to. Whatever it is.

[Christy Lee]

The crown.

[Tom Griswold]

I did watch that. I did watch part of that. That was really well done.

[Christy Lee]

Very well done.

[Josh Arnold]

I wanted to, but I watched the wrong thing.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

I thought it was called the Crowning. And when I Googled that.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, dear.

[Josh Arnold]

Really gross. Videos.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. We have a. We have a crowning on board a plane again.

[Josh Arnold]

Really?

[Tom Griswold]

Second time in a couple of weeks.

[Chick McGee]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I. What is the. Would someone from an airline explain this to me? Can you get on a plane when you're nine months pregnant?

[Chick McGee]

I don't think you should.

[Josh Arnold]

Unless you say it's your emotional support. Fetus. Then they're not allowed to ask.

[Christy Lee]

I don't think they're allowed to ask you how many weeks you are.

[Josh Arnold]

But shouldn't they be?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, aren't you putting them in?

[Christy Lee]

I think.

[Tom Griswold]

Potential liability.

[Christy Lee]

What is it, 35 weeks? 34 to 30.

[Tom Griswold]

This is. This. This is the second time in a few weeks we've had a. Fortunately, a successful birth. And in this case, this lady was lucky because there were two EMTs on board the plane.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, wow.

[Chick McGee]

You know.

[Christy Lee]

You know, the baby just slid right out.

[Chick McGee]

I'm just looking for excuses to cancel stuff. So why wouldn't you go? I can't. I'm pregnant. I'm gonna stay home. Right?

[Josh Arnold]

You have nine months to get out of jail free.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

And you guys should all be happy that I didn't. I eloped over the weekend, as you know. I'm happy for you. See?

[Chick McGee]

I was happy. Well, here's the thing.

[Tom Griswold]

Because you don't like going to weddings. You talked about it a million times.

[Chick McGee]

No, no, no, no. It's not just. No one likes going to weddings. It's. Right. Christie and girls like her.

[Tom Griswold]

So what we're gonna do is we're gonna have a regular party. But it won't be like. It'll be kind of a celebratory thing. No. No gifts. Just a. Hey, here's a party. You don't have to sit through a ceremony and all that stuff.

[Chick McGee]

I was absolutely convinced that you'd gotten married, I don't know, three or four years Ago and just had. Never had.

[Tom Griswold]

Just never told us.

[Chick McGee]

So you getting married was very anti. I could care. I. I'm glad you're happy, but I. I swear, I thought you got married like three or four years ago and didn't tell it.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, that's the mystery. That is me.

[Chick McGee]

I don't know. I don't know if I didn't.

[Pat Godwin]

I've been with him.

[Tom Griswold]

I have a question, by the way. I haven't had to wear a wedding ring for not just, what, four or five days now. Is there some kind of oil you're supposed to put on these things to get them on and off? Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, you sure did.

[Christy Lee]

Is it that tight you can't get it off?

[Chick McGee]

Yes, sir. The tighter the marriage, the tighter the ring.

[Tom Griswold]

Let that sit there for a while. By the way, our first letter is. Hey, Tom, don't knock her up. That's Gary and Mylon. We appreciate that.

[Chick McGee]

Well, you have to get all the. You have to get all the emollients and all sorts of things to take care of that finger and that.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm serious.

[Josh Arnold]

I mean, you've got.

[Tom Griswold]

You have ball powder, which. And you brought me some. I don't know what happened.

[Chick McGee]

Got it right here.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. I want to take that home.

[Chick McGee]

I want to rub it on myself, and then.

[Tom Griswold]

I know Oscar has beard oil.

[Chick McGee]

Yep.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm just asking, seriously, is there some kind of thing you're supposed to put on these rings to get them? I don't know.

[Christy Lee]

You wash your hands, you don't take them off, first of all.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

Yes. You have to have, ideally, cocoa butter. Oh, yes. Really?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

You're kidding. Okay, I'm gonna olive the glitter.

[Pat Godwin]

Butter would work.

[Tom Griswold]

I'll look it up.

[Christy Lee]

Are you taking your ring off?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Why are you taking it off at the gym? And for what? Pilates. You. It's.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know if you're gonna bench press or something. You should take that ring.

[Chick McGee]

You're doing 320.

[Christy Lee]

That's why you're supposed to wear the rubber one that they gave you because it's pliable and you can, Tom.

[Josh Arnold]

And the words wear rubber don't usually.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, well, I can remember a day when you. You said you wore rings. You hated wearing them.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't wear jewelry. Except for a watch. I. I haven't worn a watch my whole life. I like wearing a watch. I'm just used to it. But I don't. I've never.

[Josh Arnold]

Off your finger all the time.

[Tom Griswold]

I've never worn a. Like, bracelets.

[Pat Godwin]

Or you get used to the ring, though. It feels good.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, it feels good.

[Josh Arnold]

It looks cool.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, it is a cool looking.

[Josh Arnold]

What is that? Is that sort of a cardigan you're wearing?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I was freezing this morning.

[Josh Arnold]

It looks great.

[Chick McGee]

You know what it is? And he. He says he doesn't care for it, but that's a shacket.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, okay.

[Chick McGee]

It's cool.

[Tom Griswold]

I love the Verity. It's the name of the.

[Christy Lee]

Oh my God.

[Tom Griswold]

It's very nice.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, good.

[Tom Griswold]

Now trust me. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

You know, Quince does a fine product

[Tom Griswold]

for now, very little. Coming up, we have some clarity in the. In the world of recent news stories. We're going to try to get to.

[Josh Arnold]

We don't care for that. Yeah, we like it muddy and fuzzy. Possibly false.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

But.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Well, we've got some great stuff coming up today as well, including a fascinating world record with a. Sometimes I wish everything we could do we could show you as you listen to your radio. Obviously we do stream it on YouTube, etc.

[Pat Godwin]

Etc.

[Tom Griswold]

But there's some really funny stuff visually in the news today. Any breaking sports news.

[Chick McGee]

Well, I'm going to do this just for you. NBA playoffs Jalen Brunson.

[Tom Griswold]

Ah, then came Brunson there.

[Chick McGee]

He has 39 points last night.

[Tom Griswold]

I'll get the theme song out for you. Then came Bronson fans.

[Chick McGee]

I hope so. Knicks beat the Hawks 126.9732 lead. And that best of seven. Victor Wembanyama had 17 points, 14 rebounds and he's 9ft tall. He should be scoring more points. Yeah, and getting more rebounds.

[Josh Arnold]

Is his coach telling him that?

[Chick McGee]

I would hope so.

[Josh Arnold]

You're not. Hey, look at the mirror palace.

[Chick McGee]

Look how much taller you are than everyone. Make a shot.

[Christy Lee]

Are they gonna have to make the goals? Higher one.

[Chick McGee]

Yep. That starts next season. 114.95.

[Tom Griswold]

That would ruin all the records.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, and Joanna, Joel Embiid, 33 points. And the Sixers beat the Celtics last night. He's back. That's right.

[Tom Griswold]

And then I need someone to answer the question. Is the vuvuzela still a thing with. With the World cup coming, is that going to be.

[Josh Arnold]

I imagine it will be. That's just my guess.

[Tom Griswold]

I do have a recording if you forgot the sound of the. The vuvuzela. When was this? What was when. I forget when. When did.

[Christy Lee]

This was the World Cup? When it was in South Africa, wasn't it?

[Tom Griswold]

There it is.

[Chick McGee]

Jesus. Well done.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, it sounds like drunks with tubas.

[Chick McGee]

I think you should take this opportunity. And every Time we mention the World cup, that, that. What are you not going to do?

[Tom Griswold]

Go or watch?

[Christy Lee]

Vuvuzelas are officially banned from most major football tournaments and stadiums worldwide, including Alfa and UEFA competition.

[Josh Arnold]

How about that?

[Chick McGee]

And when she say football, she means soccer.

[Tom Griswold]

Soccer, right.

[Christy Lee]

The ban is due to their extreme noise level, which poses a risk of hearing damage, disrupts broadcasting, and inhibits player communication.

[Tom Griswold]

Huh?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, that's kind of the point is to inhibit the player communication.

[Chick McGee]

What about those? I always like those. They fill them up. They're about two and a half feet long.

[Tom Griswold]

Cast the nets.

[Chick McGee]

No, they're. No, these are maracas.

[Tom Griswold]

You're shaking your hands like balloons and

[Chick McGee]

you bang them together. Yeah, I always like those.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, those are fun at NBA games.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Rods kind of things. Yeah, yeah, yeah, those are cool.

[Tom Griswold]

They are.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah, they're kind of fun. Not as cool as vuvuzelas, but they're. No, no, they're trying.

[Josh Arnold]

But I like Tom's contention that we replaced the vuvuzelas with a new tradition. Drunks with tubas and that kinda kind of.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, but the people sitting behind you aren't gonna be very happy.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, I'd rather be behind the drunk with a tuba than just the drunk

[Chick McGee]

bottle in front of me. The frontal lobot. No, that's exactly right.

[Tom Griswold]

We have a pretty cool drunken drunks in the news stories also coming up.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, we got a one really good one. And a good world record, as I indicated. Right now.

[Josh Arnold]

You know, I've been drunk. I've never been so drunk to make the news. You know what? That's a new goal of mine.

[Chick McGee]

Well, I share that.

[Tom Griswold]

We got. We got at least two of them coming up this morning.

[Chick McGee]

All right, let's do it.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. One of them is for you golfers out there. I think you'll. You'll really enjoy this one. Now, right now I want to talk about another. Let's see, how can I segue into this elegantly? Let's see. You've never been done.

[Josh Arnold]

That won't work.

[Tom Griswold]

How about a record? I know what it is. I got. I get a thought of it. Right now, houses in the United States of America are going for record prices. Am I right, Christy Lee?

[Christy Lee]

That's exactly right.

[Tom Griswold]

Real estate agent. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Median price in The United States, $420,000, ladies and gentlemen.

[Chick McGee]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, the point is, your house, if you've lived in it for a years, is probably worth more than it was when you bought it. In fact, in some cases, double, depending on how far back you want to go. The point is there's a lot of equity in your house and you don't have to necessarily sell it. Take advantage of that. What you can do is you can refinance it and take some of that cash out. Perhaps you want to pay off some high interest credit cards or perhaps you want to, I don't know, get some nice kitchen appliances and fix up the kitchen. Yeah, there you go. Put a nice porch on there, have some barbecue. You know what I'm talking about. American financing, this is what they do. They're known as America's Home for home loans. If you own your home, you might want to give them a call. Check them out [e-mail] I've got these stats that they sent me. Right now, their average client, they're saving about 800 bucks a month now that they've done a refi. So they've lowered that mortgage payment. They've also got a thing going on and it says here for a limited time where they could actually delay two mortgage payments. So this might help you get your head above water. It depends on your situation. Obviously give them about 10 minutes and they can do some numbers for you and see if this might work out for you. Find out. You can call them at 866-889-2611. It's American financing. I know you can't remember a number if you're driving right now, so just go to american financing.net do me a favor and put slash Bob and Tom so they know that we sent you. Once Again, that's American Financing.net NMLS 182334 NMLSConsumerAccess.org APR for rates in the five start at 6.327%. For well qualified borrowers, call 8668-2611 for details about credit costs and terms, visit AmericanFinancing.net BobandTom Average savings based on borrowers who save over $199.99. I don't know about you, but I like keeping my money where I can see it. Unfortunately, traditional big wireless carriers also seem to like keeping my money too. After years of overpaying for wireless, I finally got fed up with crazy high wireless bills, bogus fees and so called free perks that actually cost more in the long run. And I switched to Mint Mobile and now I'm only paying a fraction of what I used to pay. Mint Mobile works for me. It'll work for you too.

[Christy Lee]

Ditch overpriced wireless and get three months of premium wireless service from Mint Mobile for 15 bucks a month. All plans come with high speed data and unlimited talk and text delivered on the nation's largest 5G network.

[Josh Arnold]

Bring your own phone and number, activate with ESIM in minutes and start saving immediately. No long term contracts, no hassle. Mint Mobile is here to rescue you with premium wireless plans starting at 15 bucks a month.

[Chick McGee]

If you like your money, Mint Mobile is for you. Shop [e-mail] Bob and Tom. That's mintmobile.com Bob and Tom Upfront payment of $45 for a 3 month 5 gigabyte plan required equivalent to $15 customer offer for just 3 months only. Then full price plan options available. Taxes and amp fees extra. See mint mobile.com welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts studios. Think O'Reilly Auto Parts. For all your car care needs. Get the parts and service you need fast from the professional parts people at O'Reilly Auto Parts. Christy Lee at the news desk.

[Christy Lee]

Hello, Chick.

[Chick McGee]

Hello. There's Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Paycheck.

[Chick McGee]

Got the guitar, got the piano, the organ. There's Josh Arnold.

[Josh Arnold]

Hi there.

[Chick McGee]

He's the I hate Steven Singer, sidekick chair. There's Ace Cosby. Hello, I'm Chick McGee. Hello, Tom. You're stern.

[Tom Griswold]

And before we get to our letters licking, I took a couple days off last week, as you know, and took the opportunity to elope.

[Josh Arnold]

There you go.

[Tom Griswold]

Got married to Kelly. Was great.

[Josh Arnold]

That is great.

[Tom Griswold]

On the beach in the rain. I've been informed by everyone I know now, but apparently I didn't know this. Getting married in the rain is good luck.

[Josh Arnold]

Excellent.

[Christy Lee]

That's what I've always heard.

[Chick McGee]

Ooh, I hear laughter in the rain.

[Josh Arnold]

Nice day for a wet wedding.

[Tom Griswold]

It was wet. It was great. The. When we were doing the ring thing. Quite literally. Okay, you hold the umbrella. So we did have this big umbrella. But if you see that they put a couple pictures, I think on our website.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, they're great.

[Chick McGee]

I am soaked.

[Josh Arnold]

Your song could be. Is it the Hollies?

[Chick McGee]

The rain, the park, another thing.

[Josh Arnold]

Bus. Bus stop.

[Chick McGee]

Sh. Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

There we go.

[Chick McGee]

Everybody knows that part. That's right.

[Tom Griswold]

So I. But I was gone a couple days last week and it's my understanding I missed a song. Is that correct, Pat?

[Pat Godwin]

A couple of them, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Wait a minute. Hang on. I don't know why, but Tom's irritated by it. Let's, let's.

[Josh Arnold]

Is that the case? You son of a. Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

How dare you write while I was gone.

[Chick McGee]

I missed a song. Is that right?

[Tom Griswold]

Now you want to do it?

[Josh Arnold]

No, wait. No.

[Tom Griswold]

It's just. That's. That's the cue.

[Chick McGee]

Slayly.

[Tom Griswold]

With Pat, it's. You get it all set up, and then he looks at you as if.

[Josh Arnold]

Huh, this was the.

[Tom Griswold]

It reminds me of what Chick always talks about when you go to a store and you're behind some lady, and it's always a lady, and they go through all this stuff, and then she looks up like, oh, I have to pay now. Searching the purse for the wallet. With Pat, it's. We talk about a song. We set it up, and then he looks around and you're thinking, grab the guitar. Begin the song. Short intro, please.

[Pat Godwin]

It's not just what went down.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, okay. That's exactly what just happened. Does this need an introduction? Is there a news story related to this?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, my God.

[Pat Godwin]

See, this is.

[Josh Arnold]

This is why he doesn't know when to start, because you don't know when to stop.

[Chick McGee]

This entire thing is eating it.

[Tom Griswold]

I'll say 3, 2, 1. You go, 3, 2.

[Pat Godwin]

That's not how it's gonna work. I'm in charge now.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, he's gonna be in charge for at least two or three minutes.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, right? This is a work in progress that we did last week, and it came off pretty good. It's a song about my little doggy.

[Tom Griswold]

Your doggy?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. I like songs about my little dog.

[Pat Godwin]

It's called O de Brody Getting the Pup. It was a great idea. My son's joy is worth the price. Pothead Training was harder than expected. And all of your friends give you advice. Take him out a lot. No late night snacks, put them in the crate. Keep him on track, buddy. Ruined the floor. Landlord giving me flack for turning my place into outhouse shack. Wine, wine, wine. Yappy, yappy, yap. Piss, piss, piss and a crap, crap, crap. Chewed the molding and barfed on the carpet. Got out of the crate and the floors got scratched. Jump for a ball and the window got cracked. Oh, I'm never getting my left shot shoe back. Hello, unconditional love. Goodbye. $2,000, 385 bucks for the vet. 100 for the toys, 30 for the collar. Snip, snip, soon and a yap, yap, yap, choo, choo, choo and more crap, crap, crap. We love our little Brody, but these are the facts. I'm never getting my deposit back.

[Tom Griswold]

Very good. What a good doggy. Thank you, Pat. Now it's time to check in with our letters.

[Chick McGee]

Do we have emails from our listeners? I'll Start us off. Dear Bob and Tom show. I know you guys are at work, so I'll get to the point. First of all, congratulations, Tom and Kelly, on the marriage. Tom's linen pants incident reminded me of my own poor clothing choices. Near water.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I will explain once again. I always wear black underwear and Kelly had purchased some white linen pants for me to wear. I didn't bother trying them on and when I did, you could see the black underwear through the trousers. I ended up having to wear her underwear, so hot for the ceremony and I had to turn it around backwards because the front area was. Things were flopping out. That's all. That's the short version of the story, but it's true.

[Chick McGee]

Rich. Continues. It was the summer of my senior year. My girl talked me into a last minute trip to the city pool. I didn't have trunks with me, but I did have my favorite pair of soccer shorts. Half black and half yellow. I went to change. One of my girlfriends suggested I just wear the shorts so I would have dry underwear for the trip home. Well, I wore the shorts commando. Nothing visible as I get into the pool. But then when I got out, I noticed that when this fabric got wet, it becomes transparent at a city pool. I was instructed by the lifeguards to please go into the changing room and get dressed because I was causing quite the problem at the pool being more or less naked in front of everyone. That's from Rich in Benton, Kentucky.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, thank you.

[Chick McGee]

Rich saw right through them.

[Tom Griswold]

Good to know. Yep, good to know. Christy, what do you got over there?

[Christy Lee]

This is from Jack in Linden, Pennsylvania. Tom, you're correct. Getting married in the rain is good luck. Also, though, it's a sign of fertility. Is there another baby in the future?

[Tom Griswold]

I don't think so.

[Chick McGee]

I don't think so.

[Christy Lee]

Well, you never know.

[Tom Griswold]

I'd like to be around for the graduation from sixth grade.

[Christy Lee]

And dear Pat, in honor of Tom's wedding, could you play White White House Lighthouse?

[Tom Griswold]

Isn't that a bad luck song? Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. That's not very nice, Griffith.

[Pat Godwin]

I did do it at somebody's wedding recently, but that's the first time in a long time they're still together and

[Josh Arnold]

they knew the story and loved that.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, yeah. They had like a Halloween ish type wedding.

[Tom Griswold]

We were talking about something yesterday that I. I think is really interesting. Our friend Alan had gone on vacation and lost his phone at the Rome airport.

[Christy Lee]

Right.

[Josh Arnold]

Like a real moron.

[Tom Griswold]

But the problem was he could only. He could only remember one phone number. Number.

[Christy Lee]

Was it yours?

[Tom Griswold]

No. So it was someone that I know. So that person then texted me and said, alan doesn't have a phone. If you need him for anything, you're gonna have to do, et cetera. But we. We were all talking about it and none of us have very. No very many phone numbers anymore. It's just a aspect of the way we live these days. I bet. You know what Andy's.

[Christy Lee]

And then I thought about it. I do know my two girls number.

[Josh Arnold]

You do?

[Christy Lee]

That's it.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know any of my girls,

[Christy Lee]

but Sophie's number is the coolest phone number ever.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, give it out. What is it?

[Christy Lee]

I can't say. It's 00, then 0003. So it's like, wow. Yeah, it's really great.

[Tom Griswold]

I had a cool phone number very briefly once.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, but that's not. Don't shortchange yourself. You had a lot of cool numbers.

[Tom Griswold]

No, but I had. Especially in high school, I had a really cool number phone number. When I had my very first house. This is the best phone number. I moved in and the phone never stopped rings. It had belonged to a pizza place. Ah, had to get a new number and then.

[Josh Arnold]

Didn't you?

[Chick McGee]

Isn't it true you had the coolest locker combination ever? Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

8, 18, 28.

[Christy Lee]

That is a good one.

[Tom Griswold]

And my brothers and I would. My brothers and I passed that lockdown.

[Chick McGee]

He's so excited about it. I still remember it still to this day.

[Josh Arnold]

In my head. I was like, why is Chick asking him about that? And then he answered and I remembered, oh, yeah. It's so funny how excited he was

[Christy Lee]

so happy about it.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, no, but that was a big thing, right? Jim gave it to John, who then gave it to me so we could.

[Chick McGee]

I'm surprised there wasn't a ceremony.

[Christy Lee]

You're lucky because our lockers, they were built in. You couldn't, you know, you had to pass a locker.

[Josh Arnold]

We had both.

[Chick McGee]

You'd have to take the doors off to pass the locker down.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. One school had bring your own lock. The other school had.

[Tom Griswold]

And this is nothing to do with what we're talking about, but you talk about taking the doors off. That did remind me. I forget if I mentioned this or not. When Bob and I lived in Harbor Springs, we were roommates as well as on the radio together. And our. Our house was kind of famous. Our apartment was sort of famous for after parties, if you will. And we never locked the door. But if it was locked, the door had been put up improperly. So I forgot. How do I explain this. The hinge pins were on the outside and they were real loose.

[Christy Lee]

All you had to do is pull

[Tom Griswold]

the hinge pins out. So does this make sense? So to open the door, all you had to do was reach. Reach up and pull the one out, then reach down, pull the one out, and the door came off. So sometimes I'd get home and. Well, I guess there must be something going on here. The door is in the hallway.

[Chick McGee]

Remember those days, though? And it was totally cool. You kind of hoped that your door was off the hinges so you'd have a party, Right?

[Tom Griswold]

We never locked door. There was nothing to steal. I didn't have any furniture. What are you gonna do, steal my laundry? If you do, please do it.

[Josh Arnold]

Do you guys want to hear a weird story that we've gotten from a listener? And what it's gonna lead to is perhaps theories on our part.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

As to what is going on here. He says that he was last night conducted a major transaction in a public restroom.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

As I sat down, I noticed a jump rope hanging on the coat hanger hook in the stall.

[Jess Hooker]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Couple seconds later a guy comes in and goes, ah. And then he heard the guy go, excuse me, is there, is there a jump rope in there? I said, yes, there is. He said, man, can I have it? I'll, I'll wait, I'll wait, I'm sorry. And he said, no. He was able to reach up, grab the jump rope, sling it over the top of the stall door, and the guy goes, thank you. Took the rope and left.

[Chick McGee]

And that was his.

[Josh Arnold]

That was, that.

[Tom Griswold]

Was it at a gym?

[Josh Arnold]

That's. It does not say gym. And I would think that our email writer would have. Would know. Hey, if this happened at a gym, this all kind of makes sense.

[Tom Griswold]

Maybe, maybe it was a park. Yeah. Softball game or something was going on, or soccer game.

[Christy Lee]

Jump rope to the bathroom.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, a guy who was.

[Josh Arnold]

You're just carrying it. I guess if you're at a park

[Tom Griswold]

and maybe your kids are playing and you want to get some exercise. And he goes. Has to make. Goes into the bathroom, hangs it in the hook.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, yeah, that happens all the time.

[Josh Arnold]

I mean, that says. This is the whole idea. What the hell happened here?

[Chick McGee]

Well, if my kids are going to get a little exercise, I better not forget my jump rope.

[Josh Arnold]

I was thinking maybe somebody left somebody who frequents this public restroom.

[Chick McGee]

Uh huh.

[Josh Arnold]

Kept the jump rope there as a handle so they could hover over the seat as opposed to. That's actually. But the guy came back for it. So Obviously that's not the case.

[Christy Lee]

That's an interesting theory.

[Tom Griswold]

You thought that, man.

[Josh Arnold]

Because I've heard. I've heard stories of people putting their coats on the coat hanger or a scarf and hanging onto it so that they can just hover over the seat.

[Tom Griswold]

That's paranoia. I'm glad you told me that. Now I know what to do in the future.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I just spit on the toilet seat.

[Chick McGee]

I don't think we know the depth. Girls have to hover all the time.

[Christy Lee]

I don't. I sit. I don't care.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Look how I'm alive. I'm healthy.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, but do you have any butt diseases?

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Chick McGee]

I wouldn't tell anybody either if I had a butt disease.

[Christy Lee]

I put the toilet paper down.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, that's pretty elaborate. But touching. Touching. That work, that holder, though, is. That's where all the germs.

[Christy Lee]

Touching what? Holder?

[Tom Griswold]

Toilet paper holder.

[Christy Lee]

I'm just touching the toilet paper, not the holder.

[Tom Griswold]

The last guy that was in there, probably smeared with germs.

[Josh Arnold]

I think about that every. Because sometimes in the bathrooms here, the toilet paper roll is off the holder. Because our holder is a little problem.

[Christy Lee]

Right?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

So how do you. How do you get the toilet paper off? Typically you put two fingers in the roll.

[Chick McGee]

Uhhuh.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, so does everybody else.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And one of the pink, one of the stink.

[Chick McGee]

Absolutely.

[Tom Griswold]

By the way, can you unpaten something?

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, what would you like to see? I like this idea because whatever you're saying, the.

[Tom Griswold]

The toilet paper holders, they've got two rolls in them and then the one is done and the other one's supposed to come down.

[Chick McGee]

It never does.

[Tom Griswold]

It never works.

[Chick McGee]

No, it's locked in.

[Tom Griswold]

Whoever patented that. I'm sorry.

[Chick McGee]

Not only that, take it away. But it also hinders the roll you're trying to use.

[Jess Hooker]

Exactly.

[Christy Lee]

Because it falls down too early on top of it.

[Tom Griswold]

But yesterday we also discussed. I don't know how we got on the subject of antique things in men's rooms and ladies rooms. The roll of cloth, hand washing, the never ending cloth. And I. You're right, those were really kind of good.

[Chick McGee]

I really like absorbance. They seemed fresh every time I used one.

[Josh Arnold]

But then what creeped us out, as in D.C. they would say the optics of it was that it was. It would just go around and around.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

How did they. I guess they just replace it with a new roll. Is that what they did?

[Tom Griswold]

Made a cool sound?

[Josh Arnold]

The guy told me. Then they would launder the other. The roll that was in there.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, they did?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, okay.

[Tom Griswold]

A lot of places they have the air thing. Yes. And it's usually time, so your hands don't get dry enough. And some of them won't restart for 30 seconds or whatever.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I've never ran into that.

[Tom Griswold]

Then you. Then you go out to the restaurant, look for the napkins, take them and dry your hands.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, you pat the. You pat the major D on the back a few times.

[Chick McGee]

How are you doing?

[Christy Lee]

Big fan of that dice hand.

[Chick McGee]

I'm gonna go to the.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I don't like that.

[Chick McGee]

No.

[Christy Lee]

No, you don't.

[Tom Griswold]

Other people's hands have been in there.

[Josh Arnold]

The Dyson Airplane.

[Chick McGee]

That's what I like about it. I love the name.

[Josh Arnold]

The Airblade is great.

[Chick McGee]

Air blade.

[Josh Arnold]

Do you treat it like a game of operation, though?

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

You cannot touch the side. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

It's just full of germs.

[Christy Lee]

But you're not touching the side.

[Tom Griswold]

No. And they. And the. The whole operation that bakes the germs makes them even more.

[Chick McGee]

I'm with you, Tom. I believe it.

[Josh Arnold]

It's funny. I don't think that's correct, but we all have those. We all have those sort of assumptions where it's correct in our minds, and that's how we're.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you know that the great soccer player Pele once said he developed his skills by opening and closing bathroom doors with his feet?

[Josh Arnold]

Is that something?

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Chick McGee]

You know, they have little grommets, little levers, little. A place to put your foot so you can actually open the door with your feet.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, some places.

[Tom Griswold]

A little sign on them.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, that was a good.

[Pat Godwin]

Corrals have that.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, I noticed that as the.

[Josh Arnold]

Have you ever encountered the one, though, that's on the door that's too heavy?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah. And you get a hernia.

[Josh Arnold]

I can't do it.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, my penis popped out.

[Tom Griswold]

That reminds me of one of them. It bugs me. This is one restaurant I go to. When you leave, it's. There's a. There's a. There's a door. Then there's another door three feet, four feet later.

[Josh Arnold]

Whatever.

[Jess Hooker]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

So the one door opens this way, and then you walk up to the other door and it's hinged the other way.

[Chick McGee]

Damn if it's not.

[Josh Arnold]

That's a mistake. That's a mistake.

[Tom Griswold]

So you know what I'm saying? You know which one I'm talking about? Yeah, you. You. It's. It pushes out the. And every. I always forget. So then you walk up to the second door. Oh, wait a minute. You gotta walk the other side.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. That's a mess.

[Tom Griswold]

Is that, is that a mistake?

[Josh Arnold]

It is. That must be.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, I was just, just curious. Let's check in with Christy Lee over there at the news desk. What's going on in your driveway?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, I'm sorry. No one likes to make a choice these days, but when you have two wonderful things to pick from, you can't go wrong. That's my friends at the Hyundai World because they now offer two amazing SUVs. The Tucson Hybrid that comes with America's best warranty. Or if you'd like, you could get the very stylish yet capable Santa Fe hybrid that can get a little bit more off road. I could have used the Santa Fe yesterday when I ran into that log, but it's either one is going to do great because the hybrids are amazing vehicles. And the Tucson hybrid, which I love, I just turned over 43,000 miles in a little over two years. That's how much I love it. I drive it a lot. You can do it goes from gas to electric. You don't have to switch anything. And you get amazing gas mileage. I think I'm averaging about 37 miles to the gallon. The hybrids from Hyundai, you're gonna love them. You get the best of both worlds@hyundai USA.com or your local Hyundai dealer or you call them at 562-314-4603. They have all the details for you.

[Tom Griswold]

Hyundai coming up in the news. Hey, who wants to go to the Snake Charmer Show? No, thanks.

[Josh Arnold]

You know, I'd like to see it.

[Chick McGee]

Now remember, if a snake goes into the crowd, that's exactly what happened.

[Tom Griswold]

We have another kid born in an airplane.

[Christy Lee]

I did some research on that. And there are airlines that will let you fly no matter what.

[Chick McGee]

Okay. Half in, half out.

[Christy Lee]

Delta.

[Chick McGee]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

No, if it's, it's got, it can't be half out or they're going to charge it.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, that's true.

[Tom Griswold]

If it's only a quarter out, it's, it's okay. We're returning to the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, thanks for listening this morning.

[Tom Griswold]

Got something to say? Send us an email. Bob and Tom. Bob and Tom.com the United States Soccer Federation presents the U.S. soccer Podcast.

[Josh Arnold]

My name is David Goss and I'm

[Chick McGee]

joined by my co host Megan Klinenberg.

[Christy Lee]

And now we're giving people an inside

[Tom Griswold]

look at the World Cup.

[Christy Lee]

Time's ticking.

[Tom Griswold]

I think you can feel the intensity.

[Chick McGee]

All the guys are wanting to really

[Tom Griswold]

stake their claim and they want to be on that World cup roster. There's no doubt about it. Hosting the World cup on home soil comes with its pressures.

[Chick McGee]

But we're just really excited just as the people are.

[Christy Lee]

The U.S. soccer Podcast, presented by Henco.

[Jess Hooker]

Follow and listen on your favorite platform.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom show in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. There's Christy Lee at the news desk.

[Christy Lee]

Hey, Chick.

[Chick McGee]

Hey. There's Pat Godwin.

[Josh Arnold]

Hello.

[Chick McGee]

Hello indeed. Hello, Josh Arnold.

[Josh Arnold]

Hi there.

[Chick McGee]

He's at the I hate Steven. Singer, sidekick, chairman here. There's Ace Cosby. Hey, I am Chick. And there's Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

We ever, Sorry, have we ever done this first hour and had Pat sing every break?

[Pat Godwin]

No, but we're going to start today.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, you got a song.

[Tom Griswold]

Obviously. There's a couple really good new ones

[Chick McGee]

now here I, I'm just trying to get the temperature. What's going on now? Are you and Pat going to fight every time before the song start or are you just going to go ahead and go?

[Tom Griswold]

I haven't decided yet. Boy.

[Chick McGee]

Depends.

[Tom Griswold]

Depends how long the intro is.

[Chick McGee]

That was only perfect.

[Pat Godwin]

Okay, who is the best at the intros? Getting to the point. It's got to be me. You want me to bring other people in here and have the 10 minute intro? I've been doing this for a while. I know what I'm doing. One, two, three, four, boom. Okay, I'm your guy.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, I'm starting.

[Pat Godwin]

You talk, talk, talk. I'm Guys, sneak in.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, let's go. Three, two, one.

[Pat Godwin]

It's going to be you and me, though. We got you. Set it up. I, I, I hit, hit it up.

[Christy Lee]

I don't have your guitar.

[Chick McGee]

It's right here.

[Pat Godwin]

Watch how fast I am.

[Chick McGee]

I'm couldn't be farther away from him right now.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, okay.

[Pat Godwin]

Watch how quickly I get to it.

[Josh Arnold]

He's, he's a gunslinger.

[Chick McGee]

He keeps saying it like he makes no move to the guitar.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't have to.

[Pat Godwin]

Watch out.

[Josh Arnold]

Watch. He's like Gene Wilder. Remember when he did, he didn't even move.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, that's right.

[Tom Griswold]

See?

[Chick McGee]

Want to see it again?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, we were talking about this phone situation and how our friend lost his phone while traveling in Europe and it actually ended up having a pretty good time because he wasn't staring at his phone all the time. And we had this idea for one of those Hallmark movies. I was thinking where some super rich guy, the movie opens and he's on his phone the whole time getting in a private jet and somehow loses his phone and the only number he can remember. Because this is the problem. We don't remember our phone numbers anymore. He can only remember his ex girlfriends phone number. So she has to come help him. And of course love. He. He quits his Wall street job and moves to that small town to help her with her. What's. What kind of store does she run in the Hallmark movie usually.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, in this case, why don't we go with a cupcakery?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, nice.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I was thinking a rural farm where she has a farmer's market and he helps with the animals and.

[Chick McGee]

All right.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

We've got a producer's note. We'll take it. I'm picturing Tyler Hines and Ashley Williams. Williams.

[Tom Griswold]

And I like the cupcake thing and Ashley Williams. Isn't she the one that got eaten? Wait a minute.

[Christy Lee]

Hello?

[Tom Griswold]

Wasn't she doing the munch?

[Josh Arnold]

Eating.

[Chick McGee]

Eating what?

[Tom Griswold]

Isn't she the actress in that Ashley Williams Girls?

[Chick McGee]

No, that's a different Williams, I believe. Michelle. No, that's not right either.

[Tom Griswold]

Brian Williams, the newscaster.

[Chick McGee]

His daughter.

[Tom Griswold]

His daughter, Right.

[Josh Arnold]

Boy, I thought maybe I have the name wrong. I'm thinking of Brad Paisley's wife's sister who's in all those Hallmark movies.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, okay.

[Christy Lee]

Is it Michelle Williams?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah, it could be.

[Chick McGee]

No, that's Heath Ledgers.

[Tom Griswold]

Sorry. No, we're off track. Patty, were you song ready with a song?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, of course.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, so the. The larger. The larger point is this would be a great movie.

[Chick McGee]

But does anybody else get nervous when Tom goes bad? Get ready for when my mom and dad would fight. Okay. All right.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, it's Ashley Williams. How dare you make my doubt me doubt my hallmark knowledge?

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

My gosh, you're right.

[Tom Griswold]

Imbd Arnold. Who's Brian Williams? Brian Williams daughter. Doesn't. There's a very graphic scene in that.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, she's in get out. And she's a good actress.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I think she now produces horror films.

[Josh Arnold]

She's in a couple. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Is that right?

[Tom Griswold]

Anywho, I don't know what Brian does these days.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

But Pat, this is a song about phones. Is that correct?

[Pat Godwin]

A song about phones and our modern issues with the phone. We've been together for over a month now. And I have a question. Now that we're naked and all alone I was happy to find you

[Christy Lee]

I

[Pat Godwin]

wind and dine ya so if you love me will you let me go through your phone? So what is your password? Let me see your old photos. We all have a past girl, why don't you let me go through your phone Tapping on the guitar to don't steam out of time that the man spends looking through his girlfriend's phone who is the big dude in just a Lakers jersey Sitting on the bed his johnson hanging way down low? Who is a soldier standing at attention with his purple heart on Gun cocked and ready to go? I wish I could unsee those one eyed monsters staring back at me I should have left it all alone and never went through your phone why did I go through your phone? At this point in the song, I think, should I go forward with another verse? I look at Tom. Yeah, he seems engaged. Here we go. Who's in the group shot? All of you naked on a yacht the guy next to you tied his naughty bits in a knot so what were you thinking not deleting those photos? We all have a body count, but yours is ranked according to size. Thank you at&t for that lesson on male anatomy. Oh, I should have left it all alone and never went through your phone. Damn, if you love me, why'd you let me become a guy with penis envy? Oh, if you love me, why'd you let me go to your phone? Oh, damn, why did I go through your phone? We're breaking up now.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much. You're welcome. The world of phones. And again, I have a letter right here. Going, after hearing your show yesterday, I immediately wrote down several vital phone numbers, put them on a card in my wallet.

[Josh Arnold]

Smart.

[Christy Lee]

That is smart.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm gonna do it too. We have a laminator here. We must have a laminator. Tom, you own a laminator.

[Tom Griswold]

I just have those big laminating sheets.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, I need a smaller one.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, you just.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, you do the big one and then trim it down.

[Josh Arnold]

No, no, no.

[Tom Griswold]

We got a paper cut letter. Too much?

[Chick McGee]

Too much.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, okay.

[Christy Lee]

They probably do it over at the FedEx store. You can just.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm not, I'm not paying for it.

[Tom Griswold]

It's funny because you, you had a letter about this jump rope thing in a public bathroom. Yeah, it's funny because for Christmas I got Kelly jump rope lessons.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, cool.

[Tom Griswold]

She's extraordinarily athletic, as you know.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

And I'm, I'm, I wanted to see her.

[Christy Lee]

She opened that gift.

[Chick McGee]

What did you get her?

[Pat Godwin]

Okay, this is.

[Tom Griswold]

Kelly is extremely athletic.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

However, yeah, she never learned how to jump rope. And she mentioned that in conversation once. So I found, I found a jump rope instructor.

[Josh Arnold]

I think this is a fine gift.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know why I, I, I got a hold Of a photograph.

[Chick McGee]

Is it any wonder you guys got.

[Tom Griswold]

I got a photograph of a woman. It better have been a Louis Vuitton swing. And then I had PJ put Kelly's face on it, so it's sort of sweet.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

And framed it. So she's gonna be taking jump rope lessons from Ms. Bailey.

[Josh Arnold]

Very nice. But she'll be doing double unders in no time.

[Tom Griswold]

Jumping rope is a great exercise.

[Chick McGee]

Double dutch and all that.

[Tom Griswold]

Really good form of exercise. And by the way, if you're ever at Disney World, don't cheat yourself. There's a. They have a jump rope thing that goes on the streets. Some of the street performers. They're unbelievable.

[Christy Lee]

So do you jump rope?

[Tom Griswold]

A barrel. I mean, I don't do it, but I should do it more often. But it's a great exercise. But we had an odd letter today about a guy again. He said he was in a public

[Josh Arnold]

restroom and he saw a jump rope on the coat hook.

[Tom Griswold]

He's sitting down, doing his business, and another guy came and said, hey, is there a jump rope in there? Sure is.

[Josh Arnold]

And he slung it over and the guy took it.

[Tom Griswold]

Are you aware of the jump rope rhymes?

[Josh Arnold]

I don't have any memorizing.

[Tom Griswold]

Benjamin Franklin went to France to teach the ladies how to dance.

[Chick McGee]

No days. Was he there? 1, 2, 3. Something like that.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Right. First the heel, then the toe. Spin around and off you go.

[Josh Arnold]

I hope you're reading that.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, there's no way not remembering it.

[Josh Arnold]

Otherwise. You were. You were beat up.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah,

[Tom Griswold]

I just remembered the first part. That Benjamin Franklin went to France to teach the latest how to dance. Then I actually googled that, and here it came right out. But there's a whole bunch of them.

[Christy Lee]

I remember something about a bus.

[Josh Arnold]

By the way, if Ben Franklin went to France, he. He wasn't there for the ladies.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, he taught him. He taught him how to.

[Christy Lee]

Well, oh, I remember this one. Cinderella dressed in yellow outlook and for a fact. Yeah, I remembered on the top of my head. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

So this guy's sitting on the crapper, and another guy comes in and goes, hey, is there a jump rope hanging on the hook in there?

[Josh Arnold]

You know what?

[Tom Griswold]

There is.

[Josh Arnold]

And he gives it to him and the guy.

[Tom Griswold]

So Benjamin Franklin came to France to teach the ladies how to dance. I came here so I wouldn't crap my pants. And then I'll come out and we'll do a dance. Thank you very much,

[Josh Arnold]

ladies and gentlemen.

[Tom Griswold]

Baby, that's a weird story.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Now, again, we're assuming this didn't take Place in the gym.

[Chick McGee]

Otherwise it was clickbait way wrong quickly. Like if any either one had an attitude about what was going on.

[Josh Arnold]

Right.

[Chick McGee]

You know.

[Josh Arnold]

Right.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. I got the jump rope.

[Tom Griswold]

You know what are you about it?

[Chick McGee]

This is my time. Right. Right now.

[Tom Griswold]

He didn't just. Did he just reach over and grab it?

[Josh Arnold]

No, no. The guy said, you know what? He said, is there a jump rope in there? Wait. No, you know what? I'll wait. I'm sorry. Like, he was kind of. Hey, this is a weird.

[Chick McGee]

Wait a minute. There is a jump rope here. And he handed it.

[Josh Arnold]

The guy goes, you know what? There is. And he. He was able to grab it while still sitting and fling it over the door.

[Chick McGee]

Exactly.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Some of the quality jump ropes had ball bearings in the handles.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, you can pay as much as you want for jump ropes.

[Tom Griswold]

Rope.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

I. Hopefully Kelly has those. I want to get her the playground jump rope.

[Christy Lee]

Believe me, she had a nice jump rope or he would have been strangled.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, the different weights.

[Pat Godwin]

This one rope. Did you get her just one?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, the main thing is I got her the lessons from.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, the lessons.

[Josh Arnold]

No, that'll be.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, she really excited about it.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know.

[Pat Godwin]

I.

[Tom Griswold]

There might have been a little something from my buddy Stephen Singer in there as well. I'm not an idiot. Yes, there was a bracelets. Thank you, Stephen. Thank God.

[Chick McGee]

It must have been a really long bracelet to use it for a jump rope. Thank you very much.

[Tom Griswold]

Coming up, we have exciting things in the news. A cool world record. We've got some stuff in the world of sports, in the NBA. We have sperm racing once again in the news.

[Chick McGee]

I've never been more excited. Sperm racing is back, baby. And we've got it.

[Tom Griswold]

We have a really interesting story out of Kentucky. A guy was watching a football game. Something happened that caused something to happen to him that probably saved his life. So this may be a great excuse, fellas. This may be a great excuse to watch the NFL. I'll put it that way. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show. Hey, thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom show this morning. Get a look at today's show on our YouTube channel, American Legion.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. And Tom has a solo in this music. Tom, would you care too?

[Tom Griswold]

Freddy's Bo.

[Chick McGee]

Yes, sir.

[Tom Griswold]

Stronger than dirt.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. There's Christy Lee at the news desk. Hi, there's Pat Godwin.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello.

[Chick McGee]

There's Jess Hooker.

[Jess Hooker]

Hello.

[Chick McGee]

There's Josh Arnold.

[Josh Arnold]

Hi.

[Chick McGee]

Hi. Indeed. There's Ace Cosby. I'm Chick. Hello. Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

At what age do kids become terrible with each other? Like, I mean, that.

[Chick McGee]

No, no. When they get around other kids.

[Tom Griswold]

That's from my childhood. Freddy's BO and I.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, how old were you guys?

[Tom Griswold]

That would have been about fourth grade.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, it sounds eight or nine, I would say. Eight or nine.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And then all of a sudden. All of a sudden. And it's got to be now with social media, you know, Freddy's B.O. would be a national headline.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. There used to be a day when you'd get off the bus and go, oh, I don't have to worry about being bullied for another 12 hours.

[Chick McGee]

Now it's, hey, Josh, have you seen your homepage?

[Josh Arnold]

It's even worse here. I can't wait to get back to school.

[Jess Hooker]

Have you encountered your bully as an adult? Bolt.

[Josh Arnold]

You know, I don't think I really had a singular bully.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, there was.

[Josh Arnold]

I would never.

[Pat Godwin]

I just did at the reunion.

[Jess Hooker]

You did?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Champion Evans.

[Christy Lee]

How'd that go?

[Pat Godwin]

He was seemed to downtrodden and beating my life. Yeah, I was happy.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, good.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, Godwin Champy Evans. How you doing?

[Pat Godwin]

It was just like that.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, really?

[Pat Godwin]

He held me down and spit on my face when I was a kid.

[Josh Arnold]

Now, was he only a bully to you, though?

[Pat Godwin]

No, he's tried to be a bully to everybody.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Yeah, I had a bully.

[Christy Lee]

Did you? You had a lot of bullies, right?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but the one. There was one guy at my high school that I truly hated, and he, oddly enough, he tried to. Then years later, tried to sell me insurance.

[Chick McGee]

I believe that. Yeah, I.

[Josh Arnold]

What a what?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, that's like my phys ed teacher. We try to go. I try to go to a football game at my high school every year, and I was at one and he came up and sat down next to me in the crowd, started talking to me.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh.

[Chick McGee]

And I said, marty, do you think we're friends?

[Josh Arnold]

The worst bully I ever had. I was almost an adult, really. I was 22 or 23, and she was a high school senior. I was the manager. I was the assistant manager of a movie theater, and she was one of the employees. And she bullied you mercilessly, like, to where? I think about it every now and again. No kidding.

[Tom Griswold]

This is going to be the topic of therapy this week.

[Josh Arnold]

It has not come up in therapy because it hasn't, thankfully. It hasn't permeated my life totally. But every now and again I go, man. And I can't remember her name, which is a good thing.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, that's good. Oh, that is good.

[Christy Lee]

Is it considered bullying if the girl stole your boyfriend because she had sex with them and you wouldn't.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know. Was she mean to you about it, or was that just so she'd be like, ha, ha?

[Christy Lee]

I don't know if she told everybody, but everybody assumed.

[Chick McGee]

What? Were you mad?

[Tom Griswold]

Wait a second. Hang on a second. Body language. Christy suddenly bent over, closed her arms, genuinely pissed.

[Chick McGee]

Were you mad at her exclusively or him?

[Christy Lee]

For both of them, but I'm still friends with him. Oh, actually, I still talk to her, but. Oh, I would never say we're friends.

[Josh Arnold]

Here's what we're gonna do. You invite her to lunch and. And us to lunch as well. And we're going. We're gonna.

[Chick McGee]

I believe Josh and I call this. We'll fix her little red wagon, man.

[Christy Lee]

I was.

[Josh Arnold]

And then I'll banger.

[Chick McGee]

That's right.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

And then we'll spit, gobble banger. And then Ace will banger.

[Christy Lee]

What is the old saying? I just hope she was worth it. Yeah, I hope so.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm sorry that happened to you.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, it's okay.

[Tom Griswold]

I blame myself for. Let's move forward here. Do we have any more letters over there?

[Chick McGee]

Dear Bob and Tom Show. I'm so disappointed with all of you except Chick.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh.

[Chick McGee]

Within the first 15 minutes of a show a couple days ago, Chick asked, should we help Jack off a horse? And not one of you laughed. Well, you just let that comedic gem of a comment fade away without any follow up at all.

[Tom Griswold]

The setup is the famous Jacqueline Kennedy

[Josh Arnold]

joke, how did you break a wrist or something?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, she was helping Jack off a horse.

[Josh Arnold]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

See her husband. You referred to him as.

[Chick McGee]

Thank you, Chick, for trying Serena in Rhinelander, Wisconsin.

[Josh Arnold]

Those are my favorite moments. You get those emails? Nobody paid attention to that. I heard it.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. When you're a sniper like Christine Godwin, they get him.

[Christy Lee]

Godwin is the best. He's. Oh, I feel right in.

[Chick McGee]

Dear Bob and Tom Show. I was catching up on your show from a few days ago, and someone mentioned Piggly Wiggly, the grocery store.

[Josh Arnold]

I think we're all fans, right?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

It reminded me of a Carnac bit on Johnny Carson. The answer is Piggly Wiggly opens the envelope. Describe Kermit's wedding night. From Gary.

[Josh Arnold]

Is Sis Boom Ba the most famous?

[Chick McGee]

It's.

[Josh Arnold]

That's amazing. Of the car.

[Chick McGee]

Just amazing.

[Tom Griswold]

The car next yeah, that is great.

[Josh Arnold]

Do you remember Cispoon Buck?

[Christy Lee]

I do not, but I remember someone in the room did a very. What, what did you call it? You didn't call it.

[Tom Griswold]

It was a Mohanas K Gandhi.

[Chick McGee]

I remember.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes. I've got that on some CDs.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

What was this?

[Josh Arnold]

We can recreate that chick. You do the best.

[Christy Lee]

Carson.

[Chick McGee]

What, what, what's the sound as a.

[Josh Arnold]

It's the sound of a sheep exploding.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Boom.

[Josh Arnold]

And I mean, it's as silly and wonderful as anything.

[Chick McGee]

And the best part of that is when Ed will stretch it out. This is everything we need to know is right here.

[Josh Arnold]

Christy, would you have made out with Johnny Carson?

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

Really?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yes.

[Chick McGee]

Wow. Okay.

[Christy Lee]

There's a great. I just saw a great clip of him and Diane Cannon. Apparently they had dated at one point.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, she's got giggles and she gets the giggles.

[Christy Lee]

She's talking about how she met, I think she met Cary Grant and said, you know, I knew within the second date that I was going to introduce him to my mom, I was going to marry him. And he goes, well, we went out a couple times. And she starts laughing so hard.

[Chick McGee]

Diane Cannon laugh.

[Josh Arnold]

She is like, it's so genuine.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. And it's like so insulting to Carson, but it was so funny.

[Josh Arnold]

She did very little for me. Where are you guys at on Diane?

[Christy Lee]

A lot of people didn't like her.

[Pat Godwin]

She's attractive, brassy, you know.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, no, I like her.

[Chick McGee]

You know what? She was brass.

[Christy Lee]

I think she is still around, actually. I looked her up after I saw that clip.

[Chick McGee]

I want to say she had great hair.

[Tom Griswold]

At one point she went on like

[Chick McGee]

an all popcorn diet and almost died. Look it up.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, she got Redenbacher's disease.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Coming up.

[Chick McGee]

But she had a jolly time. Coming up in sports.

[Tom Griswold]

Excellent.

[Chick McGee]

Thank you very much. I've never worked so hard in my life.

[Josh Arnold]

She doesn't like making that public, though. It was her pop secret.

[Tom Griswold]

I, I, I think we can end it up and go home in a jiffy.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know. Yeah, there's a kernel of comedy there.

[Tom Griswold]

I'll keep going. I'm loving this.

[Josh Arnold]

You're just buttering me up.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, holy hell. What happened?

[Josh Arnold]

Can I go home? Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Didn't we get a thing? A Jiffy Poppin. That's the one that has the thing that pops up Safari. Now, before we move forward, you, I understand, have created something special for us today. Is that right?

[Jess Hooker]

I did. I. Tom, everybody knows Tom got married last Friday. And I thought, well, he Deserves a wedding cake. And I thought, what are the most famous wedding cakes in history? And I found the JFK Jacqueline Bouvier wedding cake. The recipe. Yeah. So it's a white layer cake with raspberry jam.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, boy.

[Jess Hooker]

And. And an American buttercream.

[Ali Breen]

So.

[Josh Arnold]

And ground beef. And with saute, with peas and onions.

[Chick McGee]

And some chowa.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, Chowder.

[Tom Griswold]

That's so sweet. Thank you very much. Were you going to try that this morning?

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, we are.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, good.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, that's. That's. That's a great idea.

[Josh Arnold]

Apparently it's so good it'll blow the back of your head.

[Chick McGee]

I can't wait.

[Tom Griswold]

Maybe go back to the popcorn puns. I think right now I want to say hi to my buddy, Steven Single Singer. Because Steven Singer on a couple of occasions has saved my. My now married ass. The point is, Steven Singer has a bunch of stuff for Mother's Day. Don't forget Mother's Day. Don't be the guy. Don't be that guy.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, mom, I got you some roses.

[Tom Griswold]

There's a guy under a bridge. It was a decided cardboard sign long enough to say, some roses. That he just picked up off at a cemetery. No. Do something nice for one of the great moms in your life. Or all of them. There are a whole bunch of them. Of course. She's a mom. She's a mom. She's a mom. And one of the great suggestions from Stephen Singer Jewelers is the sunrise 24 karat gold dipped rose. This is a real rose dipped in 24 karat gold. It's an exclusive from Stephen Singer. It's got the colors of a morning sunrise because a lot of moms are up early helping out you, helping out the kids, et cetera, et cetera. So thank you, moms.

[Chick McGee]

We love you.

[Tom Griswold]

And you can show it with a beautiful rose from Steven Singer. These roses last forever, of course, because they're dipped in gold. Also, don't forget Stephen Singer. Famous for diamonds. Real diamonds, my friends. None of the fake stuff. He's got the beautiful atlas bracelet, the atlas earrings, the atlas necklaces, and many, many other things. Perhaps a charm for the charm bracelet. He's got a bunch of cool stuff. He's a dog guy, like we are. He's got even stuff for the puppies. So check out the inventory by visiting ihatestevensinger.com. by the way, the sunrise rose. Just 89 bucks. And by the way, Steven, I can't believe he does this. It's free shipping. How's that possible? Nobody does that anymore. Free shipping in this world. Well, that's amazing. And of course, everything comes in a beautiful gift box. So they make perfect gifts. Once again, I hate stevensinger.com act now get it done before Mother's Day. Coming up, we have a little news from the sports page. A few more of your letters. You can reach us, Bob and [e-mail] and want to go to the Snake Show. You may change your mind after you hear about this. These are the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Chick McGee]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. There's Christy Lee at the news desk.

[Christy Lee]

Hello, Chick Miggy.

[Josh Arnold]

That's right.

[Chick McGee]

Thank you. There's Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hi, Chick.

[Chick McGee]

Hi. What are you gonna do? You got a keyboard? Can you predict keyboard or guitar?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, it's a feeling. I go with what Tom says.

[Chick McGee]

Feel the room.

[Pat Godwin]

Check the temperature.

[Chick McGee]

Organism in flux. There's Jess Hooker. Hello, there's Josh Arnold.

[Josh Arnold]

Chick, what did the bottle of Ranch say to the refrigerator?

[Chick McGee]

Hang on just a second. There's Ace Cosby. I'm Chick Magee. Now, Tom, Josh has asked a question.

[Josh Arnold]

This is what I'm positing.

[Chick McGee]

Okay?

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, Go ahead.

[Josh Arnold]

What did the bottle of Ranch say to the refrigerator? Refrigerator.

[Tom Griswold]

I give up.

[Josh Arnold]

Close the door. I'm dressing.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, very nice.

[Christy Lee]

Tell you that.

[Josh Arnold]

But I have told my niece that.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

And she shook her head and walked away.

[Chick McGee]

They grow up so fast.

[Tom Griswold]

That's nice.

[Christy Lee]

That's.

[Tom Griswold]

That's enough. That's a very fine joke.

[Chick McGee]

That's a cute joke.

[Josh Arnold]

Will you tell your girls that? Sure. Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Will they get it?

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

They know what ranch dressing is,

[Josh Arnold]

and we've all experienced.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey.

[Christy Lee]

Hey.

[Josh Arnold]

Knock. I'm dressing. Yeah, yeah. Close the door.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, my gosh.

[Josh Arnold]

What do you mean?

[Christy Lee]

Well, they. Wait a minute.

[Josh Arnold]

What do you mean?

[Chick McGee]

Will they get it? What do you.

[Tom Griswold]

What did.

[Josh Arnold]

How did you hear that? I say bottle of ranch.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

That's the thing. I'm not sure.

[Josh Arnold]

Right, right, right, right.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

You don't want to say.

[Tom Griswold]

Because you can't say, what are the ranch dressings?

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Pat Godwin]

Don't say that.

[Chick McGee]

I guess I don't use the word dressing for salad dressing very often.

[Tom Griswold]

That's why I'm asking.

[Chick McGee]

I'm not sure I say Italian or French or ranch. I don't say ranch dressing or French dressing.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, sure. But sometimes you'll. Will anybody. What dressing do you have on there? Or what dressing would you like?

[Chick McGee]

I've heard that. Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

It Is an odd word, isn't it?

[Josh Arnold]

Dressing.

[Chick McGee]

Dressing. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Well, you're dressing a salad, dressing up the salad.

[Josh Arnold]

But you can also dress a turkey and you're not putting ranch on it. Right?

[Jess Hooker]

No, that's true.

[Chick McGee]

Remember the Bugs Bunny where he dresses up the chicken? Yeah. Ready to go. General puts them all in top hats.

[Tom Griswold]

Dress up your dog, which they hate. Okay, this is a nice letter here.

[Chick McGee]

Let's see about that.

[Tom Griswold]

Dear Bob and Tom Show. This is a guy doing tech. Oh, doing tech at a stage play. And he.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, you like. You like the backstage crew?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah, I wasn't. Stage crew.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Many, many years. He's at a community theater. They're putting on Bye Bye Birdie, which he'd never seen.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, he'd never seen it.

[Chick McGee]

Well, that's surprised.

[Tom Griswold]

And he couldn't.

[Chick McGee]

Was only 100 years ago they did it.

[Tom Griswold]

He couldn't figure out where he'd heard this song.

[Chick McGee]

Song.

[Tom Griswold]

Remember this one?

[Pat Godwin]

Well, because of you.

[Tom Griswold]

You, you. Paul Lind, ladies and gentlemen. You know,

[Chick McGee]

this is the basis of all of my nightmares.

[Pat Godwin]

Speaking of long entries.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. No joke.

[Chick McGee]

Ed SULLAN

[Christy Lee]

Me.

[Tom Griswold]

Harry McAfee appearing with. It's a great song.

[Josh Arnold]

That's an amusing moment.

[Pat Godwin]

Like a little.

[Tom Griswold]

It's so great.

[Jess Hooker]

They talk about Ed Sullivan.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Paul Lynn should have been giving an Oscar for playing the patriarch of a

[Christy Lee]

family when he's saying kids.

[Jess Hooker]

Really?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. You know what, though?

[Chick McGee]

I've just realized right now, I do enjoy seeing you.

[Tom Griswold]

Enjoy. I never see you until it's. It's based on kind of Elvis going into the army.

[Jess Hooker]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

And this guy. There's a contest that there's going to be one last kiss before he goes into the army with a guy named Conrad Birdie, who's kind of an Elvis like guy.

[Jess Hooker]

Okay.

[Chick McGee]

And Paul Lynn's gonna kiss somebody.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, no, no.

[Jess Hooker]

Paul Lynn was a theater actor.

[Tom Griswold]

He's great. In fact, Pat Godwin met him at. Which theater was it?

[Pat Godwin]

Canley Players. I drove him. I picked him up from the airport. Airport. And drove him around for a whole week.

[Tom Griswold]

Did he have his dogs with him?

[Pat Godwin]

He did. And his partner.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Did he try to drive you around?

[Pat Godwin]

No, no. He was a real gentleman. A little nasty when he got drunk, but in a funny way. He was really funny.

[Josh Arnold]

I can only. It must have been riotous.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, they. And I remember reading about that. He was on Hollywood Squares, famously.

[Jess Hooker]

That's how I know they eventually had

[Tom Griswold]

to get a limo or I'm Bewitched on High Street. Chick would know.

[Pat Godwin]

I'm Sorry, did I cut you off?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, they had to get a limo because he was a pretty. Apparently tipsy so much. They didn't let him get into a car accident.

[Jess Hooker]

And so did everybody just think he was an actor or. Everybody knew he was gay.

[Christy Lee]

Everybody knew.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

There is a story of I forget who the celebrity is, but he was in an elevator with Paul Lynde. And I'll clean this up, okay. Because as Pat said, apparently Paul Lynde could get salty. And he looked at him, he goes, Mr. Lind, I've always wondered, are you gay? And Paul Lind looked at him and said, said what? Have you been living under an effing rock? So while he wasn't out, right.

[Chick McGee]

He was.

[Josh Arnold]

It was.

[Jess Hooker]

Everybody assumed.

[Pat Godwin]

I'll try to clean up. I'll try to clean up what he said to me. I picked him up from the airport. They were loaded. Two little poodles and a high street shiki door.

[Chick McGee]

High street is of course, Columbus, Ohio. Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

And where the Veterans.

[Chick McGee]

Veterans Memorial Auditorium.

[Pat Godwin]

Behind that was a trailer, like an actual trailer where they kept the star. Henry Winkler was there. Vincent Price people. And the week after Henry Winkler up. They didn't. I took him to the trailer and they hadn't cleaned the trailer yet, so I took him to the trailer.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, my God. You can't tell this story. Go ahead.

[Pat Godwin]

I'm not gonna say the word.

[Christy Lee]

He.

[Pat Godwin]

He used the. He used the P word.

[Ali Breen]

Okay.

[Pat Godwin]

Female.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

So I opened the door with the key, I let him in. He goes, oh, my goodness, it smells like the P word in here. And he goes, I think.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know. Yeah, you must have been busting a

[Pat Godwin]

gut the whole thing.

[Chick McGee]

So.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, thank you. Alex in Idaho working the. The stage.

[Josh Arnold]

He also did. He was the voice of Templeton and Charlotte's Web the rat.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, okay. Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

And then Roger the alien. And American dad is of course based on Paul Lynn's.

[Jess Hooker]

Right.

[Josh Arnold]

Ride chair.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, and here's another more from Bye Bye Birdie, I believe. Kids, I don't know what's wrong with these kids.

[Josh Arnold]

Dude.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, that's kind of. This is kind of corny.

[Josh Arnold]

This is one of the more fun numbers.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

With the Ed Sullivan one.

[Josh Arnold]

No, the Ed Sullivan is purposefully corny. That one's kids. Yeah. That is interesting. It's fine that. You know what? Bye Bye Birdie is actually a fairly good time.

[Jess Hooker]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

And the telephone song at the beginning.

[Pat Godwin]

It's great.

[Chick McGee]

Great.

[Tom Griswold]

And by the way, the movie version, it's a staggeringly gorgeous. And Margaret oh.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh.

[Josh Arnold]

It's outrageous.

[Ali Breen]

Okay.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I doubt if she's much of a teenager, but don't.

[Christy Lee]

Don't waste your time.

[Jess Hooker]

Okay, Thanks. I appreciate. I appreciate it.

[Christy Lee]

I sat through.

[Tom Griswold]

It's time to move forward with a little bit of sporting news, I believe.

[Chick McGee]

Let's see. NBA playoffs last night. Jalen Brunson.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah, I forgot. Give me a minute.

[Chick McGee]

Okay. He scored 39 points, extended his own franchise record 40 point playoff games. And the Knicks routed the Hawks 126.97 at the Garden 32 lead in their best seven first round playoffs.

[Josh Arnold]

Why would you talk about. Here comes Brunson when you forgot me. Charles Brunson.

[Tom Griswold]

Charles Brunson and wait a minute.

[Christy Lee]

Who.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh God. He had a really unlikely roommate.

[Christy Lee]

Charles Bronson.

[Tom Griswold]

As a young actor? Yeah. Oh, it'll come to me. I mean, really. I know. I think it was Jack Klugman.

[Josh Arnold]

Really? Kugman and Bronson?

[Tom Griswold]

I think so.

[Chick McGee]

That's interesting.

[Tom Griswold]

The guy from the Odd Couple.

[Chick McGee]

Couple, sure.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm pretty sure that's who it was. I'll double check that Klugman have his

[Christy Lee]

own show in the.

[Josh Arnold]

Quincy. Quincy.

[Tom Griswold]

That was that weird phase where great comic actors like Andy Griffith became a cop.

[Christy Lee]

Right.

[Josh Arnold]

He became a lawyer. A very famous lawyer. Ben Matlock.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Yeah. I'm sorry, Andrew. He became a. He. He became a lawyer. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Remember the Father Dowling mysteries with Tom Bosnia? Yeah, Tom Bosnia. Even the Cosby mysteries was a show for a season or two.

[Chick McGee]

Sure was.

[Jess Hooker]

Was.

[Chick McGee]

I wonder what those mysteries.

[Pat Godwin]

What's in the drink is the mystery.

[Chick McGee]

Let's see. Joel Embiid had 33. Tyrese Maxi. That's a good name. Had 25 and 10 boards. And Sixers avoided elimination, beating the Celtics 11397 at the Garden. Victor Wembanyama.

[Josh Arnold]

Vicki. Vicki Wenwim.

[Chick McGee]

17 points, 14 rebounds, six blocks. Of course, he's nine feet tall. And the spurs never trailed, eliminating the Blazers with a 11495 victory in Game 5. NHL Playoffs. Boston, Minnesota, Edmonton win.

[Tom Griswold]

Sorry.

[Christy Lee]

What are you doing?

[Josh Arnold]

Once?

[Tom Griswold]

I'm trying to find the then game bronze.

[Josh Arnold]

Who's the great actor?

[Christy Lee]

He's got it up for you. Jason's.

[Josh Arnold]

He's in 12 Angry Men and he's in. He's the best part of the movie Shampoo. And he played Crazy like a Fox.

[Christy Lee]

Not Warren Beatty.

[Chick McGee]

Jack Weston.

[Josh Arnold]

No, it's not Jack Weston, but it's. You remember Crazy like a Fox?

[Chick McGee]

I do remember Crazy like a Fox, but I can't see the people in it.

[Josh Arnold]

I'll look it up. Sorry.

[Chick McGee]

Okay, Kentucky man, follow me now as closely as you'd like to credits a botched kick by former New York Giants kicker Young Way Ku with saving his life back in December. Mark Toothaker. That's t o o t h a k e r. Watch a lot of

[Josh Arnold]

time at the dentist, doesn't he?

[Chick McGee]

Watching the Giants play the Patriots when young Wei Ku won whiffed on a field goal attempt. Hit the ground and not the ball.

[Josh Arnold]

You get your Young waku with brown rice or white rice?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I always go brown either, but I always get extra water chestnuts. In a real life scene reminiscent of Charlie Brown and Lucy and the Peanuts.

[Josh Arnold]

No way.

[Chick McGee]

The scene made the 59 year old toothacher laugh so hard it caused a seizure. A CT scan revealed a tennis ball sized tumor on the left side of his brain.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh my gosh.

[Chick McGee]

It has been since removed and turned out to be the bingo tumor. That's right. B9. And Mr. Toothacher told the press young way coup saved my life because it could have happened on a plane going into a seizure anywhere, but it happened there.

[Josh Arnold]

Thank goodness.

[Tom Griswold]

Here's a video of the kick.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah. I mean I remember we talked about.

[Christy Lee]

Didn't we?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And I know that the Manning brothers went nuts about this.

[Chick McGee]

And this is a former like special teams player of the year in the NFL. Coup. He had a, he had great seasons kicking the ball.

[Tom Griswold]

He's currently, I think he's a free agent right now.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, he's, he's a very free agent.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. But it's interesting that this in a, in a way that they found out that he had this brain tumor.

[Josh Arnold]

Thank goodness for that.

[Tom Griswold]

Who knew? So the fellas, if you're having trouble getting permission to watch a football game, you can say, hey, this is, is. I'm doing this for my health.

[Chick McGee]

Actually. During the operation procedure, the gentleman who had a tumor removed also was bitten by a radioactive spider.

[Josh Arnold]

Is that right?

[Chick McGee]

During the procedure. And he now has a spider. Spider super strength.

[Tom Griswold]

What are you thinking of the actor Jack Warden.

[Josh Arnold]

Thank you.

[Chick McGee]

Yes. Jack Warden. He was also a great actor.

[Christy Lee]

Great actor.

[Chick McGee]

Heaven Can Wait.

[Tom Griswold]

The Apprenticeship of Duddy Kravitz.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, he is.

[Tom Griswold]

He's great in that. He's the dad. Another great movie.

[Chick McGee]

Jack Warden's awesome.

[Christy Lee]

Here we are with the five movies. Tom knows.

[Josh Arnold]

I think he's down three and 12 angry men. He's got baseball tickets and he just cannot wait to get out of there to go to the baseball game.

[Chick McGee]

And he's sweating. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Who isn't?

[Chick McGee]

All time sweaty movies. That should be in there. I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Das Boot. 12 Angry Men, a lot of heat.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, thanks.

[Josh Arnold]

That is a sweaty one.

[Jess Hooker]

Thanks.

[Chick McGee]

Thanks a lot.

[Christy Lee]

Thanks.

[Chick McGee]

The very first Sperm racing World Championships will be held in San Francisco later this year. The official site for the sport announced the competition will feature athletes from 128 countries.

[Josh Arnold]

Really?

[Chick McGee]

For $100,000 prize pool.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, we talked about this. They've been talking about doing this for quite some time. And it involves like overhead projectors.

[Chick McGee]

And competitors will go head to head with their sperm samples displayed on a microscopic racetrack which mimics the reproductive system, complete with chemical signals, fluid dynamics. Synchronized start. The sperm that crosses the finish line first will be named the winner.

[Christy Lee]

How do you qualify for that?

[Chick McGee]

I. I have to qualify.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, you got.

[Tom Griswold]

I know that it's brought to you by the. The summertime picnic staple Solo cups.

[Jess Hooker]

How do they pin the numbers on them? Like how do you.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, how do you tell them apart?

[Tom Griswold]

These are all great questions.

[Christy Lee]

They probably have some kind of identifier like that.

[Jess Hooker]

I thought all sperm looked the same.

[Christy Lee]

They do.

[Josh Arnold]

You're spermist boy.

[Christy Lee]

They all do look the same. She's right.

[Chick McGee]

They're all white and murky, aren't they?

[Christy Lee]

That's the.

[Josh Arnold]

In the actual fluid.

[Tom Griswold]

Sure.

[Christy Lee]

Fluid. That's not the sperm.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm gonna put my money knowing nothing about this. I'm gonna put my money on the Kenyon White murky.

[Chick McGee]

Well, now this is.

[Tom Griswold]

They keep winning the marathon.

[Chick McGee]

I don't know if that's going to help you.

[Tom Griswold]

Is this more of a sprint?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, you're talking disc. This is a sprint we're talking about here.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but this is legit. This is a real thing.

[Chick McGee]

Submissions to participate are currently being accepted online.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, so you only have. How do you do that?

[Chick McGee]

Only one representative from each country will be accepted.

[Pat Godwin]

If we're in Philadelphia right now, that would have got a huge laugh. But he didn't mean it. Jit is slang for.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, really?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah. In Philly. What is J I T?

[Chick McGee]

Jit?

[Josh Arnold]

Ah, legit.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

As slang for spunk. Is that what you said?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Also legit would be a French.

[Tom Griswold]

That would have been. Wow.

[Chick McGee]

You ever call it spunk, Tom?

[Josh Arnold]

That's pretty British, isn't it?

[Chick McGee]

No. Spooey.

[Tom Griswold]

No.

[Chick McGee]

Spooey gak. No.

[Tom Griswold]

What are you getting? All these.

[Christy Lee]

What is the point of this?

[Josh Arnold]

Quack baby batter.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, what about quack? There was some scientific reason that they were doing this.

[Josh Arnold]

Man.

[Chick McGee]

Chowder baby.

[Tom Griswold]

Are you through?

[Chick McGee]

I can go on. I Haven't been online yet.

[Christy Lee]

Goo.

[Tom Griswold]

There's a lady in the photo. Do we have the picture?

[Christy Lee]

There's a lady in the photo.

[Tom Griswold]

I feel the need for seed.

[Josh Arnold]

I like it. I like it a lot.

[Tom Griswold]

Got a cup in her hand.

[Josh Arnold]

Remember in the movie what you.

[Chick McGee]

Everything you always wanted? Yeah. Sex.

[Josh Arnold]

And Woody Allen is playing a sperm. They're all in line getting ready and it cuts to one black guy and he goes, what am I doing here?

[Tom Griswold]

That's a great. That's a great scene.

[Josh Arnold]

It is funny. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

And they're all wearing little white caps.

[Tom Griswold]

The woman in that scene was at the time was Groucho Marx's girlfriend.

[Josh Arnold]

Isn't that something?

[Chick McGee]

And would not shut up until she got a part in that movie.

[Josh Arnold]

And I'll see what I can do.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, look what we've got, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, go ahead.

[Josh Arnold]

Should we. Should we send somebody to the sperm race?

[Christy Lee]

Well, you have to.

[Jess Hooker]

Who would we send from here?

[Chick McGee]

San Francisco. I'll go. I'll cover it.

[Jess Hooker]

No, I mean. Oh, I. I thought we were gonna want to enter someone in this.

[Josh Arnold]

No, I just mean to cover it. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

I'd have to be Tom. He's obviously got the.

[Josh Arnold]

Well.

[Tom Griswold]

And there's only.

[Chick McGee]

You got it coming out of your ears.

[Tom Griswold]

One from each. Okay, here we go.

[Josh Arnold]

There's country is what.

[Tom Griswold]

Here's the story.

[Christy Lee]

He didn't want to stop. That's a tough word.

[Tom Griswold]

They did one last year in Texas.

[Josh Arnold]

I knew we talked about a race

[Tom Griswold]

before and there was a. Last year's prize was $10,000. And it says. The organizers say the humor helps young men talk about screenings, self exams and regular checkups.

[Chick McGee]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

Their educational booths on site with health professionals and information about reproduction. Etc.

[Christy Lee]

Etc.

[Tom Griswold]

So there you go. That's. What's the reason for it.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, good.

[Jess Hooker]

And each year a new city submits to be the host.

[Josh Arnold]

That's funny.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Exciting.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, we didn't get the super than 10 people there. We didn't get the Super Bowl. We got the sperm race.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

In San Francisco. I be very careful at the coffee bar. Room for cream. We're out of the half and half.

[Josh Arnold]

We've got some Harvey milk.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, there we go.

[Chick McGee]

You are on fire.

[Tom Griswold]

You should leave. You are just awesome today. Excellent.

[Josh Arnold]

Do not encourage me, please.

[Chick McGee]

Stupid world record coming up tomorrow. Thomas.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. And here's another sperm race they did at the Hollywood Palladium a couple years ago.

[Chick McGee]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

I know. We've talked about it. This is different. There. These are guys who are in a circle. It Looks like. Oh, it's brought to you by.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, no.

[Tom Griswold]

Saltines.

[Chick McGee]

I never. I never understood that. I never know where it came from.

[Tom Griswold]

I do remember this about these sperm

[Jess Hooker]

races, only from Tom.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

If a sperm breaks its tail, Christy, they have to shoot it.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, isn't that a shame? They got that tiny, tiny tent.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, like a little emergency room.

[Tom Griswold]

Pick it up on a silencer in the gun when they do that. I'm just asking, but. We'll return to the O'Reilly Auto Part Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show. Just gotta get a hold of us. Call, text, or email. Get all the contact information you [e-mail]. this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Chick McGee]

First, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studio. There's Christy Lee at the news desk.

[Christy Lee]

Hello.

[Chick McGee]

There's Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hey, Chick.

[Chick McGee]

There's Jess Hooker.

[Jess Hooker]

Hello.

[Chick McGee]

We're having wedding cake later. Oh, I can't. There's Josh Arnold.

[Josh Arnold]

That reminds me of a question I have for all of you.

[Chick McGee]

If I answer, there's Ace Cosby. Hey, I'm Chick. Hello, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello, Josh. Hello, Chick. Oh, you have a question for us?

[Josh Arnold]

Yes. I was recently asked, what is something you say to yourself 20 times a day?

[Jess Hooker]

Huh?

[Josh Arnold]

And my answer was, and I'm setting myself up here a little bit, but my answer was, don't eat that.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, okay.

[Josh Arnold]

It seems like, no, but it seems like 20 times a day. I'm like, don't eat that. You don't need it. You're fine. What do you guys. And you had a moment like that yesterday, apparently. Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

Where you.

[Tom Griswold]

That's a great question.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

What do you say to yourself the most?

[Jess Hooker]

I say shoo, shoo. Like, it's just like a shoosh. I say that all the time.

[Josh Arnold]

So I. I'm guessing that could mean.

[Jess Hooker]

It could mean anything.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm exhausted. Yeah, I. That was. That felt good. And I got it done. And. Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

Yes. It's always yeah after. Yeah. I also go,

[Pat Godwin]

what's that about?

[Jess Hooker]

I don't know. Like, it's just so.

[Christy Lee]

Say it out loud.

[Jess Hooker]

Yes. I say it out loud all the time here. Jason and Jeff hear me, and it's just like a reset. Like, I'm walking down the hall and I'm like, okay, okay,

[Tom Griswold]

I get that. Thank you. I'm glad you taught me that. I need to. I'm going to be needing that a lot today.

[Chick McGee]

I don't do that one. But every now and then I'll do I do that.

[Jess Hooker]

That's a good one, too.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

But that is an interesting question.

[Chick McGee]

I do the five things. I try to line up the senses and. Okay, you're fine. You're sitting. Get a touch of something, smell something. Just calm down. Everything's fine.

[Josh Arnold]

That's very nice. That's good. That's great.

[Chick McGee]

Yes. I don't need to run out into traffic. What?

[Tom Griswold]

How does that go again?

[Chick McGee]

You just get in touch with your five senses or something like that. What you see, what you smell, what you hear.

[Tom Griswold]

That sounds like a lot of work.

[Josh Arnold]

It said. It, like, centers your nervous system.

[Chick McGee]

I know better than to try to have a conversation.

[Christy Lee]

What do you say to yourself 20 times a day?

[Pat Godwin]

Well, the joke answer. No, I'll be honest. I do this. I do 20 times a day. If I'm anxious, my mom does that, too.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah. It's like. It made my mild depression, where you're just like, oh, overwhelmed. I do that, and it always throws me when I do it. It just.

[Tom Griswold]

What did it used to be?

[Pat Godwin]

It's what I would say.

[Josh Arnold]

Bartender,

[Tom Griswold]

don't waste your time putting ice in that.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, you're bruising the whiskey. Get over here.

[Josh Arnold]

Growing up, I thought I would eat whatever I want. I mean, I guess I. I did through my 20s and 30s, but I can't believe, as an adult, I'm going, oh, no, don't have another. Yeah, when you grow up, you think, oh, I'm gonna have as much

[Christy Lee]

as you can. But it just. You've learned.

[Josh Arnold]

You learn that you don't feel great.

[Jess Hooker]

I went to a wine tasting last night. Just a tasting. Like, tiny pores. I feel like trash today. I can't even handle a wine tasting.

[Chick McGee]

You remember, Josh? A second on the lips, a lifetime on the hip.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, I had one. Stick with me. The other day, a woman said, you know, the first bite tastes the same as the last bite.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I say that. And I'm like, oh, I say that.

[Jess Hooker]

That's gonna stick with me.

[Christy Lee]

I say that. Jess, I'm guilty.

[Josh Arnold]

I have such a problem with food. I'm like, no, it doesn't. Like, I'm. I'm trying to fight that hard.

[Christy Lee]

My kids yell at me all the time. Well, you've seen it here. I leave one kick cat slice.

[Jess Hooker]

So were you, like, an almond Mom? That's what they call them.

[Christy Lee]

No, no, no. My kid. No, no, no.

[Jess Hooker]

Okay, but.

[Christy Lee]

But I do. I mean, I don't. I can have, like, five M and M's. I don't need Godwin.

[Josh Arnold]

We have to talk.

[Jess Hooker]

What happened was it happened sometimes. Like when he hits the counter or

[Pat Godwin]

you made me laugh at the bartender and my phone thought I fell again.

[Jess Hooker]

And so it goes off and it's like, should we call 911?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Well, well, well.

[Christy Lee]

I always say the first bite tastes the same as the last. So why eat the whole thing? It just tastes.

[Josh Arnold]

Because that first bite was so damn good.

[Christy Lee]

Well then have to do and then be done.

[Jess Hooker]

I can't do it. I gotta finish it.

[Tom Griswold]

How often do you say to yourself in any given day, okay, why did I walk in this room?

[Josh Arnold]

I'm gonna say at least a half a dozen times.

[Christy Lee]

I do it all the time.

[Chick McGee]

I told you it helps me. You have to go out the doorway or a doorway and go back through the doorway and reset your brain and

[Christy Lee]

you can remember would find my earrings I lost two days ago.

[Jess Hooker]

That's like a woo woo thing though. Like that's like.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, there's no scientific basis whatsoever.

[Jess Hooker]

It's like women who won't put their purse on the ground. Like that's like.

[Christy Lee]

That's a thing.

[Ali Breen]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

Yes. You can't put your purse on the ground because it. It. You don't attract abundance if you.

[Christy Lee]

I have never heard911 is calling.

[Tom Griswold]

Getting really complicated.

[Chick McGee]

You can't make your lunch order until you can salt the bones in your car.

[Christy Lee]

I have never heard that.

[Chick McGee]

What are they, Josh? Runes. You get the runes.

[Tom Griswold]

To get back to our topic earlier, which was the. The sperm races. And where were they? San Francisco.

[Chick McGee]

San Francisco. I was born there. That's right.

[Tom Griswold]

And apparently this is like year three of these sperm races. And it's. It's to promote various aspects of male health and. But there's a hundred thousand dollar prize and it's done with some kind of microscope. And they project it onto the wall. This says sperm when leaving, the male member is traveling at approximately 28 miles an hour.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I thought. I thought it was a lot faster than that.

[Tom Griswold]

How do they get the radar gun down there?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, that's 28 miles.

[Tom Griswold]

That's pretty quick.

[Josh Arnold]

28 miles.

[Jess Hooker]

That's faster than a school zone.

[Chick McGee]

Wasn't us.

[Christy Lee]

Then they slam into the egg.

[Tom Griswold]

I was gonna say that. I said no, I don't really wanna get into Epsteinville here.

[Chick McGee]

Doesn't super man's sperm though travel much faster than I didn't?

[Josh Arnold]

Oh yeah. It's a wonder that Lois Lane did.

[Christy Lee]

So when they hit the egg, do they just explode or.

[Tom Griswold]

I think it slows. Doesn't it slow down in the.

[Josh Arnold]

Sure it doesn't maintain 28 miles.

[Christy Lee]

Well, I was gonna say that would hurt.

[Jess Hooker]

You remember the beginning of look who's Talking?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

That's how I learned how it happened. Yeah. I had no idea.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I think. Aren't those also the credits of the Woody Allen movie? Everything you ever wanted to know about sex.

[Chick McGee]

Well. And Marty's Supreme.

[Christy Lee]

Does Marty Supreme?

[Jess Hooker]

Does it.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, that's right. That you're. Yeah. Very good, Very good. Well, let's get back to the sports page. I said you had a little.

[Chick McGee]

Not just any sports page, Tom. Stupid world record.

[Christy Lee]

Oh.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, you don't care for this one.

[Chick McGee]

A performer from California has been officially named the world's oldest female unicycle rider.

[Tom Griswold]

This side. This is not.

[Christy Lee]

How old is she?

[Jess Hooker]

She's 96.

[Chick McGee]

Hang on a second. You're not gonna believe how old she is.

[Josh Arnold]

A woman who rides a unicycle. She could be 32.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Ms. Linda Jarrett achieved the Guinness World Record title when she rode her unicycle during a production of the Nutcracker at the age of 69 years, 189 days. Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

Is the Nutcracker. Do they traditionally have a unicycle?

[Josh Arnold]

Not that I'm aware of. Not usually.

[Tom Griswold]

That'd be fun.

[Josh Arnold]

Maybe the director saw that on her resume and went, hey, you know what?

[Christy Lee]

Well, they do have toys that come to life kind of thing.

[Chick McGee]

Do we have a picture of this lady? Don't they, like float or something?

[Tom Griswold]

Now, here's the unfortunate thing. The unfortunate thing is the unicycle between her legs is black. She's wearing red polka dot suit. It looks like she has a massive bush.

[Josh Arnold]

You got to really want to see that.

[Christy Lee]

That's not what I thought either. She looks like she's not here in a cycle.

[Jess Hooker]

Giggle.

[Chick McGee]

But, yeah, it's not that. It's not that massive, actually. I've seen much bigger bushes.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

I mean, she could cover it with a bikini.

[Tom Griswold]

You don't think that's a little awkward?

[Josh Arnold]

Well, I think everything about it is awkward, yeah. First off, why is she a clown? That. It looks like to be 1am right?

[Tom Griswold]

It is pitch black.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. She's out in the middle of the street one way or something.

[Josh Arnold]

How about that?

[Jess Hooker]

It is weird.

[Tom Griswold]

Can you ride a unicycle?

[Josh Arnold]

No, I've never even tried.

[Christy Lee]

There's no way I can.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't have the core strength for that.

[Christy Lee]

My stocky's a big unicyclist.

[Jess Hooker]

He is.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Jess Hooker]

That's track.

[Josh Arnold]

You have one?

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah. My dad bought it for me when I was a kid, but the kicker was we had a gravel driveway.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, hey, you learn there. You can do it anywhere.

[Chick McGee]

You can do it there. You can do it anyway.

[Jess Hooker]

I thought that was weird.

[Josh Arnold]

Now, there is a guy. We've all seen him, I think, around here.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

Who? And he. He's terrific. He rides it like he's riding. Like he's biking for exercise.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, yeah. Your core has to be amazing.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but he's the guy that. His is six feet off the ground.

[Josh Arnold]

It did seem taller than what she was working with.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, but you don't have to be

[Chick McGee]

6ft off the ground.

[Tom Griswold]

No, he has one. That's if it's the same guy over that way.

[Chick McGee]

He.

[Tom Griswold]

I see him all the time. It's real high.

[Josh Arnold]

It has to be the same.

[Jess Hooker]

Is he wearing a backpack? Like, is he going places?

[Josh Arnold]

You know, it just. It looked to me like. Like, because he. When I saw him, he was speeding around a corner.

[Jess Hooker]

No kidding.

[Josh Arnold]

And I was so impressed.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

And they do that. Kind of lean. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

But so be so, so lonely.

[Tom Griswold]

She's almost 70.

[Chick McGee]

Unicycle.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Well, remember the unicyclist we had in the building? That guy? Anyway, who do you want to.

[Josh Arnold]

Who would you rather talk to? Unicycle guy or parrot guy?

[Chick McGee]

I think parrot guy.

[Christy Lee]

No contest in parrot will talk to you.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I know. That's the thing. You're going to get interrupted.

[Tom Griswold]

And parrot guy's good. A got bird crap all over his shirt.

[Christy Lee]

No, he doesn't.

[Josh Arnold]

There's a chance.

[Tom Griswold]

What do you mean, no, he doesn't?

[Christy Lee]

Well, I've been around parrot guys before. They don't have bird poop on their shirts.

[Chick McGee]

There are some parrots that are very well trained.

[Josh Arnold]

Sometimes they do.

[Tom Griswold]

Birds can't hold it. They just go with willy nilly.

[Christy Lee]

Okay, I'm just saying I've been around, right?

[Josh Arnold]

I've been around them where no poop and I've been around where a little poop.

[Jess Hooker]

Okay, okay.

[Josh Arnold]

I've talked to too many parrot guys in my life.

[Chick McGee]

I've been around them where almost always the parrot. The guy who owns the parrot is way too intimate with the parrot. Intimate and not like us, but like kisses it on.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, you're exactly right. Feed it with his mouth.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I can't get over how loud they are.

[Josh Arnold]

Very loud.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, man.

[Chick McGee]

I had parrots for neighbors when. Oh, man, it was awful.

[Josh Arnold]

They didn't get along.

[Chick McGee]

No, they.

[Josh Arnold]

So they were always just at each

[Chick McGee]

other, squawking at each other.

[Josh Arnold]

You want to bang the waitress, didn't you?

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, coming up, that's the end of our sports broadcast. Is that correct?

[Chick McGee]

Darn right. Package that up, send it to the hall of Fame.

[Tom Griswold]

We have a little bit of history for you. We have Ali Breen, I think, from London, England today. And we have interesting news coming out of ikea. Also, we have lobsters in the news, a very interesting Tesla story. The automobile.

[Chick McGee]

Have you had the Swedish meatballs that ikea?

[Tom Griswold]

Wait till you hear this story. This is really cool. And then we have another baby born on an airplane. Oh, real quick, side note. Pat McAfee on his show yesterday did a beautiful tribute to Bob. They were very good friends. And I believe we have it linked now. It's on there. Okay. Go to bobandtom.com and pat on his show on ESPN did it. Really touching tribute to his friend Bob and our friend Bob. So check it out by going to bob and tom dot com. These are the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show. Thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom show this morning even though we're

[Chick McGee]

not too much to look at.

[Tom Griswold]

You can also watch the show on our YouTube channel. Oh.

[Chick McGee]

Welcome back to the Bomb and Tom Show. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. There's Christy Lee.

[Christy Lee]

Hello.

[Chick McGee]

There's Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hey, Chick.

[Chick McGee]

Hey. There's Jess Hooker.

[Jess Hooker]

Charles. Charles.

[Chick McGee]

Yes. There's Joshua Arnold.

[Josh Arnold]

Hi.

[Chick McGee]

Is it the I hate Steven Singer?

[Christy Lee]

Are you in charge Charles?

[Chick McGee]

Sidekick Chair? No. There's Ace Cosby. Hey, I'm Chick McGee and I have a question for the room. Tom, we're going to eat some wedding cake here, Right? One of us got married. You figure out who and where do you stand on the the wedding cake and the bride and the groom and shoving it in each other's face?

[Christy Lee]

No, no, I, I, I am not a fan.

[Chick McGee]

I don't care.

[Josh Arnold]

40 a little hacky is, isn't it?

[Christy Lee]

They've kind of gotten away from that.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

I think it's cute when they feed each other and they're smiling.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Jess Hooker]

But yeah, it does.

[Chick McGee]

We don't need to get woman pushes the man over and starts laughing when he's bleeding. Stuff like that.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, this is a special wedding cake. Ms. Hooker decided she wanted to do a wedding cake for me and Kelly. That's so sweet. Thank you very much.

[Jess Hooker]

You're welcome.

[Tom Griswold]

And we didn't have a wedding cakes. We kind of eloped right. Over the weekend and we're have a party this summer you'll all be invited.

[Jess Hooker]

That'll be fun.

[Tom Griswold]

And. But you.

[Christy Lee]

That's what he would say if I said that. Yeah. I said I'll be out of town. And I go. That's what you would say.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yes, I will. Yes. Yeah. But you chose to take me back to September 12, 1953.

[Jess Hooker]

I did.

[Tom Griswold]

The date that John F. Kennedy married Jacqueline Bouvier.

[Jess Hooker]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

And they had a. It's a Boston bakery. And I am blanking on the name. It starts with the M. It's an Italian bakery.

[Christy Lee]

And yeah, you can still order it.

[Jess Hooker]

And you can still order that. That cake that they made. The original recipe.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

Through Gold Belly. Actually.

[Tom Griswold]

It's amazing.

[Chick McGee]

Love the gold belly.

[Jess Hooker]

It is a white three layer cake with raspberry jam and then raspberry jam and the buttercream.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh.

[Jess Hooker]

Mixed together in the middle and then it's amazing. And then a vanilla American buttercream on.

[Josh Arnold]

Never give you enough buttercream. Let me.

[Tom Griswold]

Where, Where'd you get the recipe?

[Chick McGee]

Hang on.

[Jess Hooker]

They, I, I, I just kind of came up with it.

[Chick McGee]

Winged it.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah. With what they said. I watched the, the owner of the bakery recreate the cake and just made, Went from a recipe from there.

[Josh Arnold]

It's fantastic.

[Chick McGee]

You know, Josh just had the first bite and it was like I felt it from over here.

[Jess Hooker]

Eating much of this kind of stuff?

[Josh Arnold]

No, no. But it would be even if I had. Just. Awesome. Well, you guys also know that wedding cake is my fav.

[Jess Hooker]

That is your favorite.

[Josh Arnold]

There's an irony to that.

[Jess Hooker]

You're gonna get it one way or the other.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. I just googled this thing. This is a. They had 1200 guests at their wedding reception.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah. The cake was huge. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, it's taller than the woman standing next to it.

[Christy Lee]

Sure.

[Josh Arnold]

Sometimes you'll go to a wedding and they'll have the wedding cake, of course. And then like a giant sheet cake that's of the same cake.

[Jess Hooker]

That's usually how they do it. Yeah. And it's Styrofoam. Everything else on the cake is Styrofoam. Them except the piece that the bride and groom cut out. It's.

[Chick McGee]

I'm sorry, it's all a big show.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

And it's like 800 bucks.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

No, it usually isn't. Oh, that's why they get the sheet cakes, because it's much cheaper to do it that way.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, how much can you go get a wedding cake for?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, it depends.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

How many are we serving? Well, it's usually.

[Chick McGee]

If you can go into me a big box.

[Tom Griswold]

No, is.

[Jess Hooker]

It's usually $3 a serving about.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Isn't a wedding cake you're fair favorite?

[Josh Arnold]

It is. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And me too. This is. But this is spectacular.

[Christy Lee]

One of my weddings, I had like this.

[Chick McGee]

One of my weddings, she says I

[Christy Lee]

had the white cake with the raspberry filling. I had that.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, that's my favorite.

[Jess Hooker]

That's a good one.

[Tom Griswold]

Freeze of leftovers.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, he could. You could have it at your win.

[Christy Lee]

Your anniversary. How to freeze it?

[Josh Arnold]

You just remember to thaw it.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, well, I think I might break a tooth. The. The official wedding cake will have to be at the party this summer.

[Jess Hooker]

Right?

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

So we're getting that organized.

[Josh Arnold]

Don't have a. Save yourself a lot of money and don't have. Have that party.

[Chick McGee]

Josh, I haven't done it.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, Josh, I got. I got a. Christy. Christy and I are writing a book called why Josh will always be single.

[Chick McGee]

Josh, I know you've done this and I thought about it because you told me about it. I'm. I've been thinking lately about going and buying a cake just for myself.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, man.

[Chick McGee]

And having a slice.

[Christy Lee]

Why not?

[Chick McGee]

Why not? You just vacation. Not now when.

[Jess Hooker]

No, we do that at our house. And it's either I'll either write good day cake on it or a bad day cake. Cake.

[Chick McGee]

Because so no matter what happens.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

We get a cake.

[Jess Hooker]

I do. If it's such. If it's such a good day, it's like, hey, everybody had a good day. It's a good day cake at home. And if you had a bad day, you deserve a piece of cake. So it's a bad day cake.

[Tom Griswold]

I just had a great idea.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Every summer I do a little event for the staff here. Yeah. Just we go to. And get a nice lunch.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah. We had a killer barbecue last year.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, there's a great cake place in town. I mean. I mean, ridiculously good. We could go there.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, that'd be fun.

[Tom Griswold]

Take that place over. Instead of lunch, everyone just have cake and coffee for lunch.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, that sounds good. They do have a good menu.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, they do.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

They have food there.

[Christy Lee]

They do have.

[Tom Griswold]

All the. The slices of cake are the size. Yeah. Cake. Cake bake.

[Ali Breen]

Yes.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, they do serve.

[Christy Lee]

They do serve.

[Tom Griswold]

I've been there 50 times. I only get. I get coffee and cake because the cake is.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, you know, it's not called.

[Tom Griswold]

It's not called other things in the men menu. Bake.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, it's not.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, cake bake, whatever you're ordering.

[Chick McGee]

It's okay. You don't have to.

[Josh Arnold]

Is it lame food like cucumber sandwiches?

[Jess Hooker]

No, it's actually not. They said, yeah, I get like a country fried steak. I don't think they have that.

[Christy Lee]

They don't.

[Jess Hooker]

You have to stop at Denny's.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, that's the stick up my ass menu is what that is. Cucumber sandwiches.

[Tom Griswold]

We have time for one quick news story from Christy Lee over there.

[Christy Lee]

We're talking about food. IKEA is turning an April Fool's joke into reality with a Swedish meatball flavored lollipop created in collaboration with the candy brand Chupa Chups. The limited edition lollipop. That's what it's called.

[Tom Griswold]

This was. This was a thing that started as a joke.

[Chick McGee]

Is this a Chupacabra?

[Christy Lee]

Chupa Chups.

[Chick McGee]

Why am I thinking chupacabra from files?

[Christy Lee]

I don't know.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, right. Okay.

[Christy Lee]

The limited edition lollipop brought to life following an overwhelmingly positive response to Ikea's joke.

[Tom Griswold]

Joke.

[Christy Lee]

One million lollipops. These are meatball lollipops. Will be made and distributed to IKEA stores worldwide starting in June. While not available for sale, you will be able to get them to try for free if you're at the store.

[Tom Griswold]

But it's ikea, so you have to put the stick in yourself.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, naturally. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

And the stick is actually in two pieces.

[Josh Arnold]

It comes with an Allen wrench. Yeah. What if the lollipop isn't a stick? It's just on an alley?

[Christy Lee]

That would be funny.

[Chick McGee]

How many Swedish meatballs could you eat in one sitting?

[Josh Arnold]

20. 25?

[Chick McGee]

I would. I would, right? Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Closer to 25.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, man, they're good.

[Josh Arnold]

No one's going to care for those.

[Tom Griswold]

Are these the ones from IKEA you're talking about?

[Chick McGee]

Yes, specifically the ones now you want.

[Josh Arnold]

Are you ready for me to anger America?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Ikea Swedish meatballs. Overrated, Josh.

[Chick McGee]

Angers America.

[Josh Arnold]

Ace Cosby agrees with.

[Chick McGee]

I do.

[Josh Arnold]

They're fine.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

They're part of the experience.

[Tom Griswold]

How big are they?

[Jess Hooker]

You know, tiny.

[Chick McGee]

They're small.

[Jess Hooker]

They're appetizers.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, they're okay. They're not big enough.

[Josh Arnold]

They're like a big marble problem, you

[Christy Lee]

know, like the big marbles.

[Tom Griswold]

The restaurant I go to where I get the spaghetti and meatballs, they're like bigger than a golf ball.

[Chick McGee]

The ideal meatball.

[Tom Griswold]

I think that's about the right size. A little bigger than a golf ball.

[Jess Hooker]

Your fist?

[Chick McGee]

No, it's the size of a tiny testicle.

[Jess Hooker]

I don't know.

[Christy Lee]

Well, testicles are different sizes.

[Chick McGee]

True.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. They are.

[Josh Arnold]

No, the same size, but one just hangs lower than that.

[Chick McGee]

People think that testicles are not like snowflakes. Everyone is exactly the same.

[Josh Arnold]

My buddy referred to it as the juggernaut. The one that sort of.

[Chick McGee]

He's. He's kind of out on his own one.

[Tom Griswold]

The one that does what exactly?

[Josh Arnold]

That hangs a little lower and seems a little bigger than the other one.

[Tom Griswold]

That's a great joke.

[Chick McGee]

Or not.

[Tom Griswold]

Today has been a series of random, weird.

[Christy Lee]

I've never eaten at ikea. Do they offer other things besides the meatball?

[Chick McGee]

They've got salad, they got steak. They've got.

[Josh Arnold]

So you can have a whole lunch period.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. They have a pasta bar, but they

[Jess Hooker]

have imitation meatballs too. They don't have. They have.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, you get. It comes out and it gives you a quick show.

[Tom Griswold]

What's interesting is the fact that this started as a. As a joke. As an April Fool's joke.

[Josh Arnold]

The lollipop.

[Tom Griswold]

And it. And this thing is not just a meatball on a stick. It's a candy. Right? It's a candy meatball.

[Christy Lee]

I don't know. I thought it was just a meatball

[Jess Hooker]

on a stone cake pop.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but it says it's.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, it's meatball flavored lollipops.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Thanks.

[Tom Griswold]

Are you sure? Yeah, that's what it says.

[Chick McGee]

Put a meatball on a stick. Don't drag candy into it.

[Tom Griswold]

No, if it's just a meatball on a stick, they would just give you a stick and you'd poke it in and. No, it's. It's a candy. That's why they merged with that candy.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. It seems gross, but fall.

[Tom Griswold]

Funny, but from a. From a big picture standpoint. And April Fools, if you think about it, is a way to test things because you can always go. I was just kidding.

[Jess Hooker]

Right. And if it bombs.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

So if.

[Tom Griswold]

If you said to your husband, I'd like to do a threesome.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh.

[Tom Griswold]

And he. And he responded with. He responded with outrage. You go, april Fools. I was kidding.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

The poor bastard goes, finally. I've been waiting for you to ask me this. Call your sister.

[Chick McGee]

What are you crying for?

[Josh Arnold]

What the hell?

[Jess Hooker]

Witch sister.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. This says it's a combination of savory Swedish meatballs and tangy. Is it lingonberry sauce?

[Jess Hooker]

Yes, it's.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, yeah. That is a candy.

[Chick McGee]

No, it's link. Linkus.

[Christy Lee]

Linkus berry.

[Tom Griswold]

You're not going to be happy until you've got.

[Josh Arnold]

And it's continental, right? Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

If chick helps you I got a

[Chick McGee]

song, ladies and gentlemen. Pack out.

[Pat Godwin]

Can you give me a finger pop when I look at you?

[Chick McGee]

Absolutely.

[Pat Godwin]

All right, here we go. Lollipop, lollipop, ikea me to lollipop, lollipop,

[Josh Arnold]

April fools

[Pat Godwin]

vegan meat lollipop, lollipop Very nice. IKEA. IKEA's got a lollipop.

[Chick McGee]

Well, now you can't stop and it's so. I agree. It was amazing.

[Josh Arnold]

We forgot the.

[Tom Griswold]

Right.

[Pat Godwin]

When I do the second chorus, I do the boom, boom, boom.

[Chick McGee]

Here we go.

[Pat Godwin]

I have my own real beef lollipop Pulled it out in the subway they called the cops IKEA made a meat one Grab a worker bench Cuz they give you a cow and an allen wrench oh, lollipop, lollipop, IKEA meat lollipop, lollipop, lollipop April Fool's lollipop, lollipop, lollipop Vegan meat Lollipop, lollipop, lollipop wow.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, I remember it this. When you're really small, you think like all adults are smart, and then. Then you get a little older and realize most adults are morons. But also when you're little, you think everything that comes out of the radio is good music.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And I remember. I think. I think the deciding one for me where I realized that a lot of it was truly fecal in,

[Christy Lee]

was that song.

[Tom Griswold]

No, was the song song. My Boy Lollipop.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, I don't know that one.

[Christy Lee]

I don't know that one either.

[Chick McGee]

I do, kind of, but I don't.

[Tom Griswold]

You played it one morning, I thought by Millie Small.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

This has its place.

[Tom Griswold]

This would be in a Quentin Tarantino movie where someone's slicing up a body.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, exactly.

[Tom Griswold]

It is as awful of a sweetest. I'm not gonna torture anyone else is

[Christy Lee]

a girl, I think.

[Tom Griswold]

God, I hope something horrible happened to her now.

[Christy Lee]

Okay, that's not very nice.

[Chick McGee]

She succumbed to her addict, thank goodness. What the hell are you talking about? You're ruining my cake.

[Tom Griswold]

Jess, thank you so much for the cake. Incredibly thoughtful.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, you're welcome.

[Chick McGee]

And.

[Tom Griswold]

And absolutely delicious. When are you going to do the Jess Hooker Cook Cookbook?

[Jess Hooker]

I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

Everyone keeps asking.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, I started writing down all of my recipes at Thanksgiving last year, so anything that I've made for the show or at home, I've. So I'm working on it.

[Tom Griswold]

All right, well, of the stuff you've made, what are your top two or three? Oh, this is. This is my number one already.

[Jess Hooker]

I'm glad you like it. Yeah, that's A, that's a good white cake. And oddly white cake is not easy to nail. It's a lot better at room temperature too. But I'll have to look through. Off to look through.

[Tom Griswold]

Let's see now. Coming up, we've got a little bit of history for you. And it's a good day in history. Got some cool stuff. Ali Breen, I think is going to be joining us from London, England today, if I'm not mistaken. Right now I want to talk to you homeowners out there. If you own your house, you've had it for a while. Let's just say your neighbor sold his house and you went, wait a second. If Mr. Johnson's house is worth that much, what's my house worth? What's happened, if you've been following the news, is for whatever reason, houses for the most part in the United States have gone way up in value. You don't have to sell your house to take advantage of that. You can refinance it and grab some of that equity. Perhaps you want to put in a new kitchen. Maybe you want to have a nice concrete porch, whatever. Maybe grab a little cash. Maybe you want to pay off some credit cards. This is all about doing refi from the experts at American Finance. The folks there sent me some numbers. Let me get it. They say that right now their average client at American Financing has reduced their payment by about 800 bucks a month. Pretty amazing. That's like 10 grand a year. And it takes about 10 minutes to figure out if this might work for you. So give them a call and there's no obligation, by the way. I should make that very clear to start a salary based mortgage consultant doing they're doing their work for you. See if they could help you out. Start today. By the way, they've got something going on right now where they can actually delay two mortgage payments if you get the thing worked out. So this might fit your situation. I don't know. But it's certainly worth a try if you want to take advantage of what's happening in the marketplace of houses. It's American Financing. I'll give you a quick phone number. Hard to remember, I know on the radio here, but I'll do it anyway. 866-889-2611 Much easier to go to American financing.net Do me a favor, add the slash. Bob and Tom. That'll help out the Show. That's American Financing.net NMLS 182334 NMLSConsumerAccess.org APR for rates in the five started 6.327%. For well qualified borrowers. Call 866-889-2611. For details about credit costs and terms, visit American Financing.net BobandTom Average savings based on borrowers who save over $199.99.

[Chick McGee]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts studios. Think O'Reilly Auto Parts. For all your car care needs. Get the parts and service you need fast from the professional parts people at O'Reilly Auto Parts. Christy Lee is at the news desk.

[Christy Lee]

Hello.

[Chick McGee]

She has a piece of news in her hand right now.

[Jess Hooker]

I do.

[Christy Lee]

I'm ready to go.

[Chick McGee]

Stand by. There's Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hey, Chick.

[Chick McGee]

There's Jess Hooker.

[Jess Hooker]

Hello.

[Chick McGee]

There's Josh Arnold.

[Josh Arnold]

Hi.

[Chick McGee]

He's at the I Hate Steven Singer sidekick chair. There's Ace Cosby.

[Josh Arnold]

Howdy.

[Chick McGee]

I'm Chick McGee. And if I could excuse you for just. If I could break in. Tom. Excuse me. We are on the air, rooting through the trash and.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello, Tom, I'm in my drawer. I'm trying to find my tweezers.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Please tell me it's something you have to go pee.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh,

[Josh Arnold]

you've just been Arnolded.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, well, sometimes I need the tweezers when I do to undo the knot that I keep in the rope. The hoist. No. Yeah. You ever have this happen?

[Chick McGee]

Nope. Never.

[Tom Griswold]

Just washing my hands. And I have a little tiny white hair growing out of the side of my nose.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, interesting. Of the side of your nose right there. Only, like, witches get that.

[Tom Griswold]

Like a little.

[Jess Hooker]

I used to know a guy who had, like, three black hairs that grew.

[Tom Griswold]

This is him. This is just. Just surface. That's this little, tiny.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, one of those freak hairs.

[Chick McGee]

I have one gray hair in my right eye eyebrow. And it keeps appearing, and I keep pulling it out. More tomorrow.

[Tom Griswold]

Apparently, someone's stolen my tweezers. Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Because it doesn't look like a gray hair, does it? It looks like there's something in your eyebrow.

[Chick McGee]

Exactly. It looks like a piece of food or something.

[Josh Arnold]

A lot of my nose hair now is white.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

And it does not look like nose hair. It looks like I've got a coke habit, which is.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I have tweezers. I'll give you. Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much. Sorry. What were we talking about when we left?

[Christy Lee]

We're gonna do news.

[Tom Griswold]

The delicious cake that Ms. Hooker made for me to celebrate my wedding. And it was the same cake that

[Chick McGee]

John and Jack and Jackie had at their wedding.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. And if You Google it. There's all you can. There's all this information about it, and they. What did I say? 1200 guests at their wedding.

[Josh Arnold]

This is sweeter than Marilyn. Marilyn's pie. That's funnier. Maryland's piece?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, absolutely.

[Josh Arnold]

Jackie's cake is sweeter.

[Tom Griswold]

I wonder if she even ate any because she was so tiny.

[Chick McGee]

Is there any contest? Marilyn Monroe or Jackie Kelly?

[Jess Hooker]

I thought she was pretty sure.

[Christy Lee]

Very pretty sure.

[Chick McGee]

But Marilyn Monroe was Marilyn Monroe.

[Christy Lee]

Well, Jackie had class. Marilyn kind of just how.

[Tom Griswold]

What? Marilyn famously never wore underwear, didn't bathe much.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, that's right.

[Jess Hooker]

Why?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know.

[Christy Lee]

She just didn't.

[Chick McGee]

Well, you like the dirty leg, though, right?

[Jess Hooker]

Not anymore. He's a married man.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, that's right. I'm sorry. What am I going to do with these hor.

[Josh Arnold]

You can tell your wife to dirty that leg up.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, once again, that's chapter three in our book. Christy and I are writing why Josh will always be single.

[Christy Lee]

Kelly, they're so nice.

[Tom Griswold]

She just did a really nice thing for you yesterday. So if I go home and go and after we gave Josh that gift, he said, maybe you should dirty it up for Tom tonight.

[Josh Arnold]

That would be a misquote. I said, dirty that leg up.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I'm sorry.

[Tom Griswold]

Just. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Josh, have you ever gone and bought a whore or two and then had to say to one, my buddy's out. Have you ever had to do that?

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, it is awkward.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Then she goes, well, how about you? Can I join? No, no, you can sit there and watch.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, but I ain't paying.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm not paying. In fact, you should give me a little money.

[Chick McGee]

That's right.

[Tom Griswold]

I've anything to change the subject. Kristy Lee, what's happening at the news desk?

[Christy Lee]

A Delta Airlines flight to Oregon turned into delivery room just before landing. A passenger gave birth to a little baby girl with the help from two paramedics who happened to be on board the flight.

[Josh Arnold]

You can just say a paramedics. We know it's two then.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, you know, it's been home runs all day.

[Josh Arnold]

Silence would have been better.

[Tom Griswold]

And then all of a sudden. Sudden he's got an opportunity to hit the winning run.

[Chick McGee]

What do you mean?

[Tom Griswold]

Kenny Casey at the bats it and it's over.

[Chick McGee]

Wait, is this Delta? You got her name or Delta then

[Christy Lee]

I'll remember that her name isn't Delta. I don't know. It began with. Oh, Brielle Renee Blair. Is her name Brielle? You look this up 5 pounds, 8 ounces. Delta Airlines apparently has no policy about flying pregnant.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, that's our policy.

[Christy Lee]

They re most people, if you have a. An ob gyn, they will tell you, do not get on an airplane at after or 36 weeks. 35 to 36 weeks. That last trimester. Those last four weeks. You want to stay close to your.

[Jess Hooker]

I don't think it's the call of the. Of the airline.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but couldn't the airline then be liable if something goes wrong?

[Christy Lee]

Some airlines do have a policy. Delta does not.

[Josh Arnold]

How many trimesters are there?

[Christy Lee]

Three, Five.

[Josh Arnold]

She answered.

[Christy Lee]

Don't be a jerk.

[Tom Griswold]

At community college, four crewmates fan.

[Christy Lee]

The plane descended into Portland. Paramedics improvised using passenger blankets and even a shoelace to assist with delivery from one of the flight attendants because apparently they don't have a baby delivering kit on a plane.

[Josh Arnold]

What was the. What would the shoelace do?

[Christy Lee]

Probably tie off the umbilical cord.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, wow.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. She arrived two weeks early.

[Tom Griswold]

Don't have teeth, so she was due in two. That's way too tight of a. I agree with deadline there.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, deadline.

[Christy Lee]

She was traveling to Portland to be with the family for the birth is

[Jess Hooker]

what it says here.

[Christy Lee]

So I'm sure she wasn't thinking.

[Josh Arnold]

I understand that. Don't you guys? You want to be where you're.

[Jess Hooker]

No.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, and this. This. I. I love this. There's a quote here in the longer article saying that they. They. They were saying, the paramedic. She's a rock star. I mean, she's obviously tremendously competent and a great person and a hero, but a rock star? Like, I'm. I'm picturing Keith Richards with a cigarette. A bottle of Jack. Hey, look at that ahead, coming out.

[Josh Arnold]

Weird.

[Christy Lee]

Three pushes. All she had. Three pushes. Baby was out. Yeah, she was ready to go.

[Tom Griswold]

What if something had gone wrong?

[Christy Lee]

Well, there's that. Fortunately, it didn't. Tom, let's look on the positive side now.

[Josh Arnold]

Did she have to keep the baby down by her feet, or could she stow it up in the overhead?

[Pat Godwin]

Was she sitting in the C section?

[Josh Arnold]

There's too much comedy going on.

[Chick McGee]

The baby has to be entirely under the seat in front of you, or it has to go.

[Tom Griswold]

Wait a minute. They. They took the. What's the. They took the afterbirth. What's that called? The placenta.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but she was only allowed to drink half of it.

[Josh Arnold]

No, no. This is my revenge.

[Tom Griswold]

No, not.

[Josh Arnold]

Not laughing at whatever crappy joke it was.

[Tom Griswold]

See, Josh, the standard hack joke is they only give you Half the coke, you see?

[Josh Arnold]

Right, right.

[Tom Griswold]

So they only gave her half the placenta. Don't they make placenta shakes now out of it or some crazy thing? But didn't we discover that that's not legal anymore?

[Christy Lee]

I don't know.

[Josh Arnold]

Boy, I hope it's not necessarily legal to just have your placenta ground up and then sell it.

[Jess Hooker]

No, don't sell it. It's for you to take.

[Josh Arnold]

That's probably not legal.

[Tom Griswold]

There was some story we had about they have to. There's some procedure.

[Jess Hooker]

Biohazard.

[Ali Breen]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

You can't just walk off with, like, a bloodborne pathogen.

[Tom Griswold]

How big is the. I should know this, having been around it a little bit.

[Christy Lee]

How big is it after birth?

[Chick McGee]

It's a little smaller than the tarp they pull out at Major League baseball game.

[Christy Lee]

Okay, about this.

[Josh Arnold]

It's about the size of a meatloaf, isn't it?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, that's a good way to put it.

[Jess Hooker]

How big are your meatloaf?

[Josh Arnold]

Well, I just remember. I remember seeing a picture in an anatomy book I had in school, and

[Christy Lee]

it's a pretty good size.

[Josh Arnold]

It looked to me like a raw meatloaf.

[Chick McGee]

I think it's about the size of a baby's onesie.

[Jess Hooker]

No.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

Okay,

[Tom Griswold]

so I have another question. It says here, as you indicated, Christy.

[Christy Lee]

Yes, sir.

[Tom Griswold]

Said Ms. Powell tore out one of her own shoelaces to use as a tourniquet to start an IV.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, okay. All right.

[Chick McGee]

She start an IV on herself?

[Christy Lee]

No, Ms. Powell, it said.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, they. It says they got blankets from other passengers and used a shoestring to tie off an umbilical cord. Yeah, that, and then also it says to start an iv. So that means they have some kind of IV solution. IV solution on board the aircraft.

[Christy Lee]

I think Powell was one of the flight attendants.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow. They did charge her, by the way, for an extra carry on.

[Christy Lee]

Sure.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. You have to.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah. Come on. Fair is.

[Chick McGee]

Fair.

[Josh Arnold]

It is.

[Tom Griswold]

And by the way, I understood the guy that was sitting behind her was really pissed when she tried to put her seat back.

[Chick McGee]

Wouldn't that be amazing? She had the baby, and they'll go. That'll be $752.

[Josh Arnold]

Right?

[Jess Hooker]

No babies are free until they're two.

[Pat Godwin]

That's true.

[Christy Lee]

They have to sit on your lap.

[Tom Griswold]

Did she have it on the floor?

[Jess Hooker]

I would assume there's no way you can deliver a baby.

[Josh Arnold]

Hopefully not on the snack cart.

[Christy Lee]

Where do you think she had it?

[Tom Griswold]

These are valid questions. Not in the ladies room. Now, what if you. What if you. Let's Just say you were on a plane. This happened to me recently and I. When I. We were talking about this before. When I fly, I don't. I might have one cup of coffee, but I'm really careful not to hydrate because I don't want to have to get up and.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, you gotta hydrate. You gotta stay hydrate.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but I don't want to have to get up and go to the bathroom. Cause some of that stay in your seat, light's on and you can't get up. What if someone really had to go? Go.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And all of a sudden this chick's given birth. Well, you can't go to the bathroom for the next hour and a half.

[Josh Arnold]

I'd step over.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Excuse me. Sorry.

[Tom Griswold]

Sorry. So they gotta be. Can they land the plane with her lying on the floor?

[Chick McGee]

Yes. Okay. Is the answer.

[Josh Arnold]

There's even a chance they took her to like where the jump seats are for the stewardesses and stuff.

[Christy Lee]

Or later. Maybe they had. They got lucky in there was one of those. What we call the three. You know, the three row was empty. Yeah, the three seats. And they just.

[Chick McGee]

That the airlines won't tell you, but my daughter was a flight attendant for quite. And they have an entire 100 seats up there in the overhead.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, they do.

[Chick McGee]

They're not. They don't sell in an emergency.

[Josh Arnold]

I got you. And by the way, I didn't mean to say stewardesses. Apparently that's meant to say flight.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, how dare you.

[Chick McGee]

My goodness.

[Tom Griswold]

Once again, Josh the book. Why he'll be single.

[Chick McGee]

Josh Angers, the airline.

[Josh Arnold]

What are you so mad about? Flight.

[Tom Griswold]

Keep this up, I'm gonna play that song My Boy Lollipop again and clear the audience.

[Chick McGee]

And when that was a hit, they had to draw the, you know, nudge, nudge. A lollipop and a penis. Right. Brought into it. Oh, yeah, like a lollipop. Come on. No, that's how. That's why it was a hit.

[Pat Godwin]

My boy Lollipop.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, I call him Lollipop because I lick him.

[Pat Godwin]

My lollipop.

[Chick McGee]

My love pump.

[Jess Hooker]

Did you guys always call it a lollipop or never a sucker?

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, growing up like, hey, when. When my parents would go to the bank. Yes, we get me a sucker. Yes, we often said sucker.

[Jess Hooker]

We always said sucker too. But I know other regions say lollipop.

[Christy Lee]

Who said sucker?

[Tom Griswold]

I think I'm the only one. I really enjoy the Tootsie Roll Pop.

[Christy Lee]

I love them. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Except for the Tootsie Roll.

[Christy Lee]

No, you're wrong.

[Tom Griswold]

You don't like the Tootsie Roll.

[Josh Arnold]

I've never. I don't like Tootsie Rolls in any form or fashion.

[Christy Lee]

Really?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

That's the only way.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, that's why you. That's why you. That's why you like cats.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, because I'm not tempted to eat out of the litter box.

[Christy Lee]

Why would you do that?

[Tom Griswold]

You know, Josh and I are doing our own show. This is referential to the point of obscurity.

[Chick McGee]

I like the Bob and Tom show. I just started listening. But that Josh is an odd fellow.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, I would like to think people say that.

[Tom Griswold]

I think today's been the most obscure, weird, off track show. We've done him a long time.

[Chick McGee]

Crap.

[Tom Griswold]

Coming up, we have today in history and I think Allie Breen, I believe she. I think she's. Didn't she say she was going to London?

[Christy Lee]

She was in London last week.

[Josh Arnold]

Ontario?

[Christy Lee]

No, London, England.

[Chick McGee]

London, Ohio.

[Tom Griswold]

She's got her boyfriend in London.

[Christy Lee]

Yes, she does. They're serious.

[Josh Arnold]

She has a boyfriend now.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

I gotta stop sending D pics to him.

[Pat Godwin]

Or start.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, let me tell you about Simplisafe. Tom, what would you do if you

[Josh Arnold]

found out if Allie called you one day and goes, hey, listen, I just. I'm not trying to cause trouble here, but Josh every day sends me a D pic. Will you.

[Tom Griswold]

What would you do?

[Christy Lee]

Say something, please.

[Chick McGee]

You know what he'd do? You know what Tom would do? He'd go, ally, I'll take care of it.

[Josh Arnold]

Right?

[Chick McGee]

That's exactly what he did.

[Josh Arnold]

And there's a chance I'd never hear about it. Right.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm having lunch with my lawyer again anyway I can. Oh, I'll handle this.

[Chick McGee]

Simply say if the do it yourself yourself home security system. That's is far. It's more better than the other security system. Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

You came in before Simply Safe was part of our show.

[Chick McGee]

I sure did.

[Tom Griswold]

You walked in here one day.

[Chick McGee]

Guess what I did this weekend. I said, how long ago was that? Oh, I want to say nine or ten years ago. Had to be just first come out.

[Tom Griswold]

And you've moved since and moved the

[Chick McGee]

system with you several times as far as the government knows. That's right. And you can easily customize the system. That's right. For your home and your compound. It's simply simplisafe.com. they have an app, guided setup. No drilling required. Of course you can install and arm your system. About an hour. It took me about a half hour. No need to wait around for a technician and a two hour window. And simplisafe not just a camera. It's a comprehensive ecosystem of sensors and cameras for inside and out. 24. 7 professional monitoring. And in the event of a break in a fire or flood, Simplisafe's agents are ready to take action. Affordable pricing. 24. 7 monitoring for a fraction of what's the traditional security Systems charge. And SimpliSafe has been named America's best customer service by Newsweek. And we'd like you to experience peace of mind that we do here at the Bob and Tom studios and I do at my own personal compound. We've partnered with SimpliSafe to offer you this discount. Get a load of this. 50% off your new system. Just visit simplisafetom.com that's half off. Just go to simplisafetom.com and remember, there's no safe. Like simply say,

[Tom Griswold]

That is like the worst thing ever.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

By the way, I just realized what's happening to me.

[Christy Lee]

What?

[Josh Arnold]

The last half an hour or so, I feel like I've been completely off the wall.

[Christy Lee]

I know why. Sugar.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. I hadn't. I haven't had. I just had an ounce.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Maybe. Of wedding cake and I.

[Jess Hooker]

Flying baby kid in a B Skittles, man.

[Tom Griswold]

And isn't it great?

[Jess Hooker]

It's insane.

[Chick McGee]

Baby nuts.

[Tom Griswold]

There's a whole. There's a half a cake in there. I can get another piece.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, that might be smart because then I would just crash.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Now when we return, a little bit of a history. Always fascinating stuff for you. And also coming up in the news, hey, the next time you're on vacation, don't go to the snake show. I'll tell you exactly why. These are the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show. Want to share a letter or comment? Our email is Bob and TomoBandTom.

[Chick McGee]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. There's Christy Lee at the news desk.

[Jess Hooker]

There I am.

[Chick McGee]

There she is. There's Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hey, chick.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey.

[Chick McGee]

We are brothers of the black shirt today. Yeah, right back at you. There's Jess Hooker.

[Jess Hooker]

Hello.

[Chick McGee]

There's Josh Arnold.

[Tom Griswold]

Hi.

[Chick McGee]

At the I hate Steven Singer sidekick chair, there's Ace Cosby.

[Josh Arnold]

Hello.

[Chick McGee]

Hello indeed. And hello. Tom. You look like you're busy. You look like you're.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm just going over some mail here. Brothers of the Black Shirt sounds like one of those organizations in a, you know, in retro Dan Brown book.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yes.

[Chick McGee]

Black shirts, brown shirts. Probably shouldn't do too Much of a deep dive on that. Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Turns out the Last Supper painting was actually breakfast. Boy, Dan, you know, I think you've run out of ideas.

[Chick McGee]

Look, Dan, clearly.

[Tom Griswold]

Those are sausage biscuits.

[Chick McGee]

Look, look, Dan, we're all fans. Aren't we all fans, fellas? Yeah, we're all fans.

[Tom Griswold]

Would it be. Could you ever go to a restaurant and say, we'd like to sit Jesus style, have them all on one side?

[Christy Lee]

You could. You could say that, I guess.

[Josh Arnold]

Isn't it History of the World, Part 1, where Mel Brooks is the waiter and he want to take it for a photo and he goes, all right, everybody on the same side.

[Christy Lee]

Same side. Why did I always think that that was outside that dinner?

[Jess Hooker]

I did too.

[Christy Lee]

I always thought it was outside.

[Chick McGee]

I think it is outside side.

[Christy Lee]

No, not the last.

[Chick McGee]

If you look at the paintings, there's an overhead.

[Tom Griswold]

Is it clear? Because I saw you read the text. Does it mention.

[Josh Arnold]

No, it's been so long since I've actually read that.

[Christy Lee]

But there was an archaeological. I follow. An archaeological site on social media. Yeah. They found where the Last Supper was held and it was inside a. You know, Fridays, A Friday, an open air cafe.

[Tom Griswold]

Jesus said, that's kind of a gold canoe up there. Can you get it down?

[Chick McGee]

Jesus is the one who said, you

[Jess Hooker]

know, I thought it was.

[Chick McGee]

You could say every day is Fridays.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Get eat here. Thank you.

[Tom Griswold]

Time for a little bit of history for you. Played the dreadful song, a My Boy Lollipop.

[Chick McGee]

And it's got to be that. You can't tell me that part of the popularity was.

[Jess Hooker]

No.

[Chick McGee]

Naughty and Lollipops and Suckers.

[Tom Griswold]

Number two in the world.

[Chick McGee]

My Boy Lollipop.

[Tom Griswold]

That's song was number two in the world. Produced by Chris Blackwell, who had that. All the. Brought in all the jamaican stuff.

[Pat Godwin]

Number two.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. 1967. The opposite of that. A great song.

[Chick McGee]

It's hard to believe.

[Tom Griswold]

Respect. Released by Aretha Franklin, written by Otis Redding.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

Big O.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, Ms. Hooker, I'm sure Aretha was the Queen of soul.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah. Big fan.

[Tom Griswold]

Sam Cooke, I believe, is considered to be the king of soul.

[Josh Arnold]

I love Sam.

[Tom Griswold]

James Brown, of course, was the Godfather. Godfather of soul.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

And Pat Boone was the opposite of soul.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Okay, let's see. Rent opened on Broadway on this date in 1995. And today tickets to a Broadway show are about as much as the average rent in Manhattan. Did you ever go see that, Josh?

[Christy Lee]

I saw it.

[Josh Arnold]

Rent?

[Christy Lee]

You didn't see Rent?

[Chick McGee]

I never.

[Jess Hooker]

I never did either.

[Christy Lee]

I only went because a group of women went And I went.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you like it?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, it's fine.

[Chick McGee]

Hey.

[Josh Arnold]

9,300,072 minutes.

[Christy Lee]

I could not sing any of the songs.

[Josh Arnold]

I didn't know that thing.

[Chick McGee]

A group of women are gonna go see Rent.

[Christy Lee]

We did some shopping.

[Chick McGee]

Who's in?

[Josh Arnold]

Rather step in front of the subway.

[Tom Griswold]

The Simpsons pass on this date in 2018. Passed. What show in the episode count to become the highest count in television history?

[Josh Arnold]

500, hundredth.

[Christy Lee]

Gun smoke.

[Chick McGee]

Gun smoke.

[Tom Griswold]

Gun smoke is correct, Ace. Because the Simpsons, though, they have that advantage of cartoons. They never have to age.

[Jess Hooker]

Right?

[Josh Arnold]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

Whereas. Oh, I see. Whereas toward the end, Ms. Kitty was.

[Chick McGee]

Well, she was a whore.

[Tom Griswold]

Gone down to a buck fifty.

[Chick McGee]

Still want some of this?

[Tom Griswold]

A buck fifty for a romper.

[Chick McGee]

Any of this before I put it away.

[Christy Lee]

You guys get old.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm stepping on my lady.

[Tom Griswold]

Happy birthday. Duke Ellington was born in 1899.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, I like him.

[Josh Arnold]

John Wayne.

[Tom Griswold]

I once saw a concert. It was. It was Duke Ellington. The Kings of Leon and Queen.

[Josh Arnold]

Wow. Prince wasn't there?

[Tom Griswold]

No, he wouldn't show up. That's when he was. He dropped his name. I'm not going.

[Chick McGee]

I refuse.

[Tom Griswold]

This is unbelievable. Willie Nelson.

[Chick McGee]

God.

[Tom Griswold]

He was born in 1933.

[Jess Hooker]

Jesus.

[Tom Griswold]

Willie Nelson.

[Chick McGee]

He's about ready to make. Make a lap.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. CNN's about to accidentally play.

[Ali Breen]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Ready and. He's old. It's gotta be again.

[Chick McGee]

Do you think there's, like. You think there's, like a staging area for obits? It's in, like, at certain part. Well, It's. He's at 85. Let's move that up to the.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, right. Closer to the.

[Chick McGee]

Closer to, like, that kind of where they're gonna get ready to play it.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, Willie's the best.

[Chick McGee]

Put it on the teaser.

[Josh Arnold]

Richards watches video of Willie Nelson. What's his secret?

[Tom Griswold]

Live forever Willie. He's great. That'd be great.

[Chick McGee]

Creepy.

[Tom Griswold]

Let's see.

[Chick McGee]

Well, Lily Nelson won't die.

[Tom Griswold]

That's why Bernie Madoff, born on this date in 1938, misunderstood hero, made off.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, Tom. How much money did he made off with? Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Is he still alive?

[Tom Griswold]

No, I didn't think so.

[Josh Arnold]

He chickened out and died of a heart attack before he could actually do any real time.

[Tom Griswold]

Didn't he? Yeah, he got a few years back. Yeah, but that was considered to be the largest Ponzi scheme of all time. Well, that's until Crypto busts.

[Chick McGee]

There it is.

[Tom Griswold]

Sorry, Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

Tom owns Crypto.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah,

[Chick McGee]

but, Tom, this is my point. Jacuzzi, Zamboni, Ponzi. All These Italians who came over and did all this stuff. Yeah, they all lived in the same neighborhood.

[Josh Arnold]

Now, his name wasn't Ponzi, though. It was actually Arthur Ponzarelli.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

So.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I mean, that's the Fonzie scheme.

[Chick McGee]

That's how he closed deals. Don't you want to be a part of this?

[Josh Arnold]

Kind of what I was.

[Tom Griswold]

I didn't pick up on it. Jerry Seinfeld. Happy birthday, Jerry. Born in 1954.

[Chick McGee]

What's the deal with birthday?

[Josh Arnold]

I love him so much. So good. Yeah. Still. Still real funny.

[Tom Griswold]

I can have dinner at 4. Happy birthday. The great Daniel Day Lewis.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, he is good.

[Jess Hooker]

Intense.

[Tom Griswold]

It's kind of nice to have someone with three names that didn't shoot Lincoln.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

It's always John Wilkes Booth. It's never John Booth.

[Christy Lee]

Well, they don't want you to confuse him with John Booth down the street.

[Josh Arnold]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

But think about it. James Earl Ray, you know, Lee Harvey Oswald.

[Chick McGee]

But there's another Lee Oswald that doesn't have Harvey for a middle name. That's why they do that.

[Christy Lee]

Right. There's other people out there.

[Jess Hooker]

So it's not until you're a murderer that they use your middle name.

[Chick McGee]

Exactly.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, it's a bummer.

[Tom Griswold]

Otherwise it'd be a dead giveaway.

[Josh Arnold]

Poor Mary Todd could never enjoy going to a restaurant. Restaurant after that because this. The hosts would say booth or table, and she'd just start crying.

[Tom Griswold]

I was swearing.

[Josh Arnold]

You're going.

[Chick McGee]

In the 1860s.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, man.

[Chick McGee]

They referred to seating in a restaurant as booths.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, that's right. Yeah. They had booths. Well, she like diners.

[Tom Griswold]

Happy, happy birthday, Uma Thurman.

[Chick McGee]

Uma Oprah.

[Tom Griswold]

I love that joke. When Dave Letterman did that, I thought he was. Was roundly assaulted.

[Josh Arnold]

It was just silly and fun. It wasn't. People were mad, but it was like, why it's so slight.

[Tom Griswold]

He was hosting the Oscars.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And he pretended he's interesting. Uma. Oprah.

[Josh Arnold]

It was Oprah.

[Pat Godwin]

Uma.

[Josh Arnold]

He just went back. It was classic Letterman.

[Jess Hooker]

Was that something he would do?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

So did.

[Josh Arnold]

And people got bent out of shape.

[Jess Hooker]

Why?

[Josh Arnold]

I think Oprah Legions Legion of fans are similar to swifties.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, God.

[Josh Arnold]

You just don't even joke about it.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Nothing funny at all. Okay. She wasn't known for having great comedians on her show.

[Jess Hooker]

No, no.

[Tom Griswold]

What is the word? Like umami. What is that in the world?

[Jess Hooker]

Mommy. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Edamame.

[Christy Lee]

No, umami.

[Josh Arnold]

It's a spice or flavor.

[Jess Hooker]

It's the savory. It's like one of the senses almost yeah. On your tongue.

[Tom Griswold]

It keeps showing up in crossword puzzles. Yeah, that's the name.

[Josh Arnold]

As you taste it, you go, oh, mommy.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Oh, it's very good.

[Josh Arnold]

Very.

[Chick McGee]

You didn't expect that.

[Josh Arnold]

Hang that on the fridge.

[Christy Lee]

But he is. You are his favorite.

[Tom Griswold]

He loves you. Good. Okay, I'll ask.

[Jess Hooker]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

What band mentions prominently Uma Thurman in a song.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, God.

[Josh Arnold]

And they're named after a Simpsons character to go back to one of the earlier histories.

[Jess Hooker]

Homer.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Jess Hooker]

The band Homer.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, they're great.

[Tom Griswold]

It's Fallout Boy, right?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Great song.

[Chick McGee]

Now fall Out Boy does cheers, right? They don't really.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Sugar, we're going down. I love.

[Tom Griswold]

Coming up, it's Ali Breen. A little bit of sexy time. These are the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Baba Tom show. More of the show is on the way. You can find us on X at Bob and Tom or you can email us at Bob [e-mail].

[Christy Lee]

yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom show. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. There's Christy Lee at the news desk.

[Christy Lee]

Hi.

[Chick McGee]

There's Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hello.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, buddy. There's Jess Hooker.

[Jess Hooker]

Hello.

[Chick McGee]

There's Josh Arnold at the IH Steven Singer sidekick chair.

[Josh Arnold]

Thanks, Shakester. Capture the colors of the sunrise. These new gold dipped roses, they're the sunrise. 24 karat at gold dipped roses from ihatestevensinger.com are my favorite that they've ever had. They're absolutely lovely. Get them now. Especially for mother's Day. AtI hate stevensinger.com There's Ace Cosby.

[Chick McGee]

Hello, I'm Chick McGee. Hello, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello, Chick. We were just talking about wishing Uma Thurman, the very fine actress, a happy birthday. And there's that great song called Uma Thurman by Fallout Boy. I did a little homework during the break. Yeah. They had to pay the rights. Rights. And they credit the original writer of the monsters theme. That's a terrific song. They also terrific.

[Jess Hooker]

I don't know it.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, oh, I'll do it.

[Christy Lee]

When you hear it, you'll go, oh, yeah, I know that.

[Tom Griswold]

You know the monsters theme, right?

[Jess Hooker]

No, no, I don't.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh.

[Jess Hooker]

In any Adam's family, I don't know Monsters.

[Tom Griswold]

The. The. They. They called Uma Thurman and got her permission. That's the monsters. Oh, this, this riff right here. Okay. They used it in the song. If you will get the song. You'll go right away. Yeah. They actually called uma Thurman. She loves it.

[Jess Hooker]

Really?

[Tom Griswold]

They got her permission to the Fallout Boy song.

[Josh Arnold]

Uma Thurman. Jason, you look confused.

[Jess Hooker]

Do they help if you listen to the show?

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, man, you are

[Pat Godwin]

a lot of rubber band action going on in here.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, I'm sorry, you were saying? Christy Lee is at the news.

[Christy Lee]

A German tourist has died after he was bitten by a cobra during a snake show in Egypt. Varying police say the 50s.

[Tom Griswold]

I tell you about, though.

[Chick McGee]

Would you want to go to the

[Tom Griswold]

pyramids or the snake show? Oh, snake show.

[Josh Arnold]

Pyramids.

[Tom Griswold]

Dumb snake show. Good idea.

[Christy Lee]

The 57 year old man was watching the snake charming show at a hotel in Hurgada where cobras were draped over the necks of audience members.

[Josh Arnold]

Why would they do this?

[Tom Griswold]

That's. Cobras are deadly.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't want to be in the same room.

[Tom Griswold]

You can die in a few minutes.

[Christy Lee]

Don't be such naysayers.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

All right.

[Christy Lee]

They had a snake charmer there. The snake charmer then let one of the snakes crawl into the trousers of the German man and then he bit him on the leg.

[Tom Griswold]

Maybe the snake went in there and said, hey, we got a little competition here.

[Christy Lee]

The man had to be resurrected. Resurrected?

[Josh Arnold]

Boy, this is. Now you buried the lead. I feel like

[Tom Griswold]

Jesus back in Egypt.

[Christy Lee]

Yes. No. The man had to be resuscitated before being taken to the hospital where he later died. German police and prosecutors are now investigating the death. Yeah, don't let a cobra up your pant leg.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't want to go to a snake show where the guy's doing crowd work. Hey, where are you from?

[Josh Arnold]

Thanks to Instagram, though. That's what people want.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, where are you from? Have you met?

[Chick McGee]

I think it's comedy. I don't know, man.

[Josh Arnold]

Cobras are way bigger too, than you think.

[Jess Hooker]

But I thought you could milk them and get the venom. The venom out.

[Chick McGee]

You can to a certain extent.

[Jess Hooker]

But if you had them with the public, wouldn't you do that?

[Chick McGee]

That's kind of a trick that you think.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I doubt if this. They really have a lot of regulations.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Ali Breen]

You know what?

[Jess Hooker]

That's fair.

[Christy Lee]

An aquarium in Massachusetts has been gifted a rare two colored lobster. Representatives for well, Fleet Shellfish Company in Eastam said fisherman caught the brown and orange crustation off the coast of Cape Cod.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, Cleveland Brown.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Lobster Brown Co.

[Christy Lee]

Ultimately donated the Two Tone Lobster to the woods. Hola. Science Aquarium in Falmouth.

[Josh Arnold]

It was immediately dissected.

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, look, it's completely easy. Yeah, we've seen one of these before. It Goes right down.

[Chick McGee]

That's the thing. I.

[Tom Griswold]

Right down the middle.

[Christy Lee]

That is amazing.

[Chick McGee]

It's like someone put tape on one side and painted it and then pulled the table.

[Josh Arnold]

You could look at that and go, finally, Reese's made a lobster.

[Jess Hooker]

But it looks. It just looks like they cooked one half.

[Josh Arnold]

It almost does. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

That's.

[Chick McGee]

That's why this half of my body,

[Tom Griswold]

it looks like a Batman villain.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, two face. Yeah, Lobster.

[Tom Griswold]

Two face.

[Chick McGee]

Two faced lobster. Bull.

[Christy Lee]

It'll be on public display if you'd like to go to Falmouth and see it.

[Tom Griswold]

They'll probably use them in a lot of commercials. Bi colored.

[Jess Hooker]

You guys like lobster?

[Josh Arnold]

He's gonna be on the college of every.

[Tom Griswold]

Or the pamphlet for every college.

[Chick McGee]

Don't you mean. Don't you mean anchoring the weekend news? Isn't that what you mean?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, that is really an oddity.

[Christy Lee]

Speaking of oddities, did you see the story about the digital art installation at the Berlin Museum, Tom?

[Tom Griswold]

No.

[Christy Lee]

Okay, well, there's a guy named Beedle. He's very well known in the art world for digital artwork.

[Chick McGee]

That's a nickname. All he does is, Hey, I'm Beetle. Beetle. Beetle. Beetle.

[Christy Lee]

So he has this installation in the Berlin Art Museum.

[Chick McGee]

That's right.

[Christy Lee]

And they are road bots with the silicon heads of Jeff Bezos and Picasso and Elon Musk.

[Chick McGee]

They are creepy.

[Christy Lee]

Would you like to show. Here's the picture.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, my God. Oh, that is also.

[Josh Arnold]

They're like. They're almost robot dogs.

[Christy Lee]

Right. And they go around and they look

[Chick McGee]

at the Bezos one.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. And they poop. Occasionally printed images of their surroundings, like, they'll just. Papers will come out with they.

[Tom Griswold]

They look like those robot dogs, but they have very lifelike human heads.

[Josh Arnold]

I couldn't hate it more.

[Tom Griswold]

There's Zuckerberg, right? There's Bezos. There's Elon.

[Chick McGee]

North Korea guys.

[Jess Hooker]

So that's a camera up front, Right.

[Christy Lee]

And so they take a. He'll take a picture and then the paper will come out the back end. Like pooping.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Why does one look like Melissa Etheridge?

[Pat Godwin]

I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

Who's that one?

[Christy Lee]

That guy.

[Pat Godwin]

But that's in the middle with the glasses.

[Christy Lee]

I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

I see Bezos. I see Elon in the middle.

[Josh Arnold]

A weird haircut.

[Christy Lee]

Zuckerberg. I don't know who that one is. Is.

[Jess Hooker]

He does.

[Christy Lee]

They don't have it listed.

[Josh Arnold]

It's very unsettling.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, it is very unsettling. I don't like it, but I didn't know if you would.

[Tom Griswold]

That's cool though.

[Chick McGee]

What do they call that? The uncanny valley.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. I don't like.

[Josh Arnold]

A little too close, but not right.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, they are kind of bizarre.

[Chick McGee]

It's like you'd meet Tom Hanks. There's something not right about it.

[Christy Lee]

The Florida Highway Patrol says an intoxicated woman was found asleep in a Tesla, which is what made me think of the Elon Musk slash German story with its autopilot feature on. Trooper Ken Watson told wwsb that the 37 year old woman was traveling northbound on I75 while the vehicle was on autopilot under the assumption that it would get her home safely.

[Josh Arnold]

The absorption, huh?

[Christy Lee]

The assumption.

[Tom Griswold]

So how does that work?

[Christy Lee]

Well, when the woman stopped, you put

[Tom Griswold]

in an address and it just goes right.

[Christy Lee]

When the woman stopped, responding to the vehicle's alerts though, it came to a halt in the middle lane of the interstate.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, it doesn't pull over.

[Chick McGee]

So this is much like when Netflix asks you, are you still watching?

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

Wow. That's. That's the only conscious.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

What they've on a car, they've got to find something better than.

[Tom Griswold]

They have sensors. What? Looking at your eyes.

[Christy Lee]

We have. Yes. We have a Tesla driver. Jason owns a Tesla, uses Autopilot all the time. And they do. They have sensors on your eyes. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Jason, do you have to be sitting in the driver's seat?

[Jess Hooker]

Seat.

[Tom Griswold]

Or can you sit next door?

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, you got to be in the door. Okay.

[Jess Hooker]

Next door.

[Christy Lee]

Next door. You mean the passenger seat?

[Tom Griswold]

Whatever. The one over there? That one.

[Josh Arnold]

You know, you certainly can't be next.

[Chick McGee]

I don't know if it's sad that he said you're next door or. We all understood what he do.

[Josh Arnold]

That's what's sad.

[Jess Hooker]

We speak.

[Christy Lee]

Tom, by the way, the woman was found to be twice the legal limit and arrested for a dui.

[Jess Hooker]

Well, what else would you use it for? Like, why can't you use it to get home if you're drunk?

[Josh Arnold]

Because you might have to actually break am.

[Tom Griswold]

That's really interesting.

[Josh Arnold]

This is just the beginning. Everything. They will all be automated. All. And to. To where you can be drunken.

[Chick McGee]

Who do you think, in this room, who do you think's going to get the first Amazon package delivered by a drone?

[Josh Arnold]

You, I would think you also.

[Chick McGee]

It's going to be me.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, absolutely.

[Jess Hooker]

Three deliveries a day.

[Chick McGee]

I'm trying. I'm really trying. I'm excited about it.

[Jess Hooker]

Did you talk to your driver about coming up to the porch?

[Chick McGee]

I did and I. I went through to the delivery services and filled out the thing and I said, I want, I want it on the front porch. You can do that every.

[Christy Lee]

Every fifth deliver different driver every time.

[Chick McGee]

Thrown out in the. It's a company, Christy. Don't defend.

[Tom Griswold]

They just throw it in the driver. So you're too lazy to walk to the end of your driveway?

[Chick McGee]

That's right.

[Josh Arnold]

No, he's Chick is right in this instance.

[Jess Hooker]

No, it's at his garage door. It's not the end of the driveway.

[Chick McGee]

It's way out at the end of too far store. You know how gigantic my house is.

[Tom Griswold]

I've never been there.

[Josh Arnold]

Too far.

[Tom Griswold]

Um, so there's nothing wrong with me

[Chick McGee]

wanting my packages on my front porch.

[Tom Griswold]

Do you think in 20 years, if you want to drive your own car, you'll have to pay more for insurance?

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, I do. I absolutely think you're going to have to pay more.

[Christy Lee]

I love driving.

[Josh Arnold]

What we're going to find is that all these automated cars, traffic is going to be almost non. Existent. That'd be cool because it'll solve. Because we all know traffic jams are essentially started by somebody tapping their brakes when they didn't need to.

[Tom Griswold]

And, well, they can go like 80 miles an hour an inch apart.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, yeah, they'll do that.

[Chick McGee]

And you know what the problem. Look, looky, lose. That's the problem.

[Jess Hooker]

You guys obviously get to work earlier than everybody else. Have you experienced the stop the. The green red light on the entry ramp onto the interstate?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. You know, a lot of Cities have that.

[Christy Lee]

LA's all over, so. Yeah, we're way behind.

[Jess Hooker]

It's. Well, it's really annoying.

[Christy Lee]

Did they start that here? I've never seen one only.

[Josh Arnold]

Is it just a temporary basis or is it now?

[Jess Hooker]

There, there, it's there, it's there.

[Josh Arnold]

They're actually not bad. It's helpful.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah. I mean, but then there's times where you're. Yeah, no, I get it.

[Josh Arnold]

But yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, coming up, it's going to be a sexy time with Ali Breen. I'm very excited about it. I. I think she's in London.

[Christy Lee]

I don't know. She was there last week.

[Jess Hooker]

She might be married. We don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

We're gonna find out.

[Christy Lee]

She might be.

[Chick McGee]

Archie's pregnant.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Midcoit is when she calls.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, I was hoping.

[Tom Griswold]

Really.

[Chick McGee]

First life Dear Allie. Hang on a second.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, right now let's get back to reality. Just around the corner, it's Mother's Day week from Sunday. Who's our guy? Stephen Singer is our guy for Mother's day. He's got everything you need. So many mothers out there.

[Josh Arnold]

Come on.

[Tom Griswold]

They go out having. They get up early, they're making breakfast, they're helping you out. And maybe you can help them out with a beautiful bit of sunrise. The Sunrise 24 Karat Gold Dip rose from Stephen Singer Juice Jewelers. Exclusively from Stephen Singer. And he's keeping the price down, just 89 bucks. It will last a lifetime. It's actually dipped in 24 karat gold. This one's quite colorful. Josh was saying it's his favorite of all these roses. And it kind of looks like a beautiful sunrise. You can experience this yourself when you go to ihatestevensinger.com comes in a beautiful gift box. And of course, the shipping is free. It's got the lifetime guarantee as all of his jewelry has that great lifetime guarantee. And he is the specialist in the world of diamonds. A diamond on Mother's Day, that's what we call in the world of baseball, a grand slam. Because you're gonna be in the money. In the money. Yeah, that's right. Steven Singer Jewelers. He's got the roses, he's got the free delivery. How can he do this? How can he have free delivery? That's impossible. No one does that anymore. Free shipping? Are you kidding me? Steven Singer Jewelers. He's a dog guy. He's even got cool charms for dog lovers. It's all there. You see it in the catalog by visiting I hate stephensinger.com. celebrate those moms in your life. All kinds of stuff, including these very cool sunrise 24 karat gold dipped roses. Once again, please visit I Hate stevensinger.com. coming up, it's going to be Sexy time with Ali Breen. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Chick McGee]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios with serious help. Here we're doing the show. There's Christy Lee at the news desk.

[Christy Lee]

Hi.

[Chick McGee]

There's Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hello.

[Chick McGee]

At the music desk. There's Jess Hooker.

[Jess Hooker]

Hello.

[Chick McGee]

At the food desk. There's Josh Arnold.

[Josh Arnold]

Hi.

[Chick McGee]

The I hate Steven Singer sidekick chair. There's Ace Cosby.

[Christy Lee]

Hello.

[Chick McGee]

At the button desk. I'm Chick McGee at the sports desk.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, nice.

[Chick McGee]

And here's Tom at the desk at the boss desk.

[Tom Griswold]

Are we going international here?

[Chick McGee]

You're the boss.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, now where. Let's see. The question is, where is Ali?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, my gosh. What? In bed am I?

[Ali Breen]

No, I'm in. Well, I'm in Florida. I'm on a futon yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, boy.

[Christy Lee]

That's fun.

[Tom Griswold]

We thought you were going to be in London today.

[Ali Breen]

No, I'm not back in London till the end of the month.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, okay.

[Tom Griswold]

All right. Okay. Are you. Are you wearing lingerie?

[Josh Arnold]

Looks like a sundress.

[Ali Breen]

It's a sundress. Exactly.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, okay. Could you lean over a little more?

[Josh Arnold]

Okay, easy.

[Christy Lee]

Hey, you're married now.

[Chick McGee]

That's actually. Yes. What's your charge, ma'? Am? He told me to lean over during

[Tom Griswold]

the live, but it looks like. It looks like it's lacy underwear.

[Josh Arnold]

I really see a sundress.

[Christy Lee]

I see a sundress, too.

[Tom Griswold]

Now she leans back.

[Chick McGee]

There's no lace at all there.

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Ali Breen]

0 lace.

[Tom Griswold]

Hang on a second.

[Chick McGee]

It's so interesting.

[Tom Griswold]

Whoops. You're right. Okay, let's move forward here. Ali Breen is a great comedian. She's an international traveler. She's been skiing in what, Switzerland. She's been bouncing around London. How did the show. How did those go in London, your live shows?

[Ali Breen]

They were so much fun. They're really good comedy crowds. So I'll be back performing there when I'm back there at the end of the month for sure. They're awesome.

[Tom Griswold]

What was it? The top. What was it called?

[Christy Lee]

Top secret.

[Ali Breen]

It's called Top Secret, and now they actually have one in New York, too. So I'm gonna start doing their club in New York as well.

[Chick McGee]

But no one's going to see it, though, because it's all top secret.

[Christy Lee]

It sounded.

[Josh Arnold]

The clip. You put up a clip on your Instagram and it was really funny, and the crowd sounds sounded really big and they loved it.

[Ali Breen]

Yeah, they pack every show. They have three shows a night at two different clubs, so you get to do three spots, and they literally pack every show. And it's funny because they do an intermission. So it's like a few acts intermission and then a few more acts, which you'd think would kill momentum, but they're even more into it after getting drunk during intermission.

[Christy Lee]

There you go.

[Ali Breen]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Well, cool.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, I'm. Ali Breen likes to help people with their love lives and hers apparently going great. We'll hear more about that at a date soon. But they write her letters. They find her by going to A L L I B R E E N on social media platforms. And they write letters to sexy time. And we'll try to help you with your love trouble. Allie, what have you got today?

[Ali Breen]

Dear Allie, I've been talking to a guy online for three months, and we started FaceTiming about two weeks ago. We FaceTimed the other night really late after. We both came home a little bit drunk, and all of a sudden he pointed the phone down. He had no pants on and was at full attention.

[Chick McGee]

Hello?

[Ali Breen]

Yeah, we have had some sexy talk before, but never like phone sex or anything. It was really jarring and I didn't like it. And he backed off immediately. Is this forgivable or do I move on?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I mean, it says something that he backed off immediately.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Really kind of tells you something about his character.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

He made a mistake.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, he didn't.

[Josh Arnold]

It read.

[Pat Godwin]

Read that right?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

I don't think it's anything to worry about.

[Josh Arnold]

No, I. I would forgive him.

[Tom Griswold]

I would say this is trouble.

[Chick McGee]

Unless he's too small to even mess with. Then you can make something.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. He's been down this road before, I think.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, boy.

[Christy Lee]

You think that's his move?

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, no, I think that. I think it's fair what she said. They were both kind of tipsy. He took a chance and.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, I think Tom's right on this. This is a move he's tried to and it has worked.

[Tom Griswold]

Could she see his wedding ring when he dropped the camera?

[Ali Breen]

It is bold to not say anything, to not even have any lead up, and then all of a sudden just be like, you like this.

[Chick McGee]

I.

[Josh Arnold]

Boy, I'm getting the.

[Jess Hooker]

I would burst out in laughter.

[Josh Arnold]

We don't have a ton of info here, but I'm getting the impression he thought he had the in.

[Christy Lee]

Right.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

I think this was an honest mistake.

[Tom Griswold]

But then doesn't that tell you something about his character?

[Josh Arnold]

What tells me more about his character is that he backed off as soon as she was like, I'm not into this.

[Jess Hooker]

I'm with.

[Ali Breen]

That's true. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I would have been appalled.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, you don't understand any of this anyway, right?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. You stupid me. Talking to people, getting to know them, being in the same room with them. Can you imagine if Alexander Graham Bell, he invents. He invents the telephone. And some goes. You're not going to believe this 100 years from now.

[Josh Arnold]

No, I. They invented the telephone one week at most. Later was the first sex line.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

I mean, when they did. When they did that with like kaleidoscopes, the first vid.

[Chick McGee]

The first movie, immediately. The second one was a topless woman.

[Jess Hooker]

Every invention.

[Tom Griswold]

How do you think so.

[Chick McGee]

I know.

[Josh Arnold]

We know so with movies.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Ali Breen]

Yeah, Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I think it's. I. I don't know. Maybe you're right to me. It's just way too weird. Yeah, it's.

[Josh Arnold]

It is. It's very.

[Jess Hooker]

But since their relationship was strictly FaceTime and phone calls, how else would you shoot your shot?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I mean, he did.

[Tom Griswold]

He.

[Josh Arnold]

He just shot it too soon.

[Tom Griswold]

Maybe make an effort to go meet in person, be in the same room, find out if he's got severe BO.

[Josh Arnold]

There's also a chance there they live 700 miles away.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Get a bus ticket.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, they might be working on that,

[Ali Breen]

but there also usually is a lead up. There's not just like a reveal.

[Josh Arnold]

There's usually like, she said they had been sexting a little. Little bit.

[Ali Breen]

Yeah. But I mean immediately, like, exactly. Before he shows it to her.

[Chick McGee]

No, no. Doesn't anyone else feel like this girl is a tease and now she's all put out?

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, that's right. She brought it on her face.

[Ali Breen]

What was she wearing? What did she say? Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Chick McGee]

You know you want it.

[Tom Griswold]

I think I wish these letters. You know, Chick and I were talking about this off the air this morning. Tell them Tom and Landers the letter. They always give him a name, right? It'll be like this. This could be Dear, Dear Jurgens lotion or whatever.

[Chick McGee]

That's right.

[Josh Arnold]

Half of us say give him another chance. Half of us say no.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I think it sounds like she. If she was doing a dirty talk via text, then maybe it'll make a

[Chick McGee]

nice story at their fifth anniversary. Remember when we first met?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, right.

[Josh Arnold]

You whipped out your wang too soon.

[Christy Lee]

Remember that?

[Ali Breen]

Is that what they call it?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, that is a meet cute meat just spelled differently.

[Tom Griswold]

You want really not to be cute, but scary. Okay, Allie, let's move. By the way, Allie, are you painting the condo down there? What are you doing down there?

[Ali Breen]

Yeah, More painting. I always am covered in paint. And

[Chick McGee]

she's covered in paint.

[Josh Arnold]

Tom.

[Ali Breen]

Yes. Painted lingerie, according to Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Okay, let's get to our next letter, please.

[Ali Breen]

Dear Allie, I have been with my boyfriend for two and a half years and I still have my apartment, but I pretty much live at his house. He has two kids in college and one just dropped out and is moving back home with his dad till he figures things out. It's killing our relationship. I know it's his kid, but if it were mine, I'd make him figure out. Figure it out on his own. I have a daughter who's fully self sufficient. I don't think he's even considered this is gonna hurt our relationship. Should I say something?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, can't the College kid. Stay at the apartment and he can come over to your place.

[Ali Breen]

Oh, that's interesting. Shift him over.

[Tom Griswold]

If she's still got her apartment.

[Josh Arnold]

I think you should say something. That way he can find out how unreasonable you are and get out.

[Jess Hooker]

I'm with Josh on this.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I mean, relax.

[Josh Arnold]

Kids come first.

[Jess Hooker]

Yes. Yeah. That's what happens when you have kids.

[Ali Breen]

Kids.

[Josh Arnold]

But my daughter is so self sufficient.

[Christy Lee]

Well, good for you.

[Josh Arnold]

You did a great job.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah. Right now.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Something's gonna happen. What is the word they use? Boomerang. Kids.

[Josh Arnold]

This kid's freshly. He dropped out of college and he's moved back home. This is as normal as it gets.

[Jess Hooker]

And your dad's bimbo girlfriend's like, you can't stay here.

[Tom Griswold]

Get out.

[Chick McGee]

Come on. What are we gonna have to do? You know, sexy time and stuff.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, we got that one fixed.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Once again, our guest is the comedian Ali Breen. A L, L, I B R E E N. I don't usually spell the names of our guests, but I do, because I want you to find her on social media.

[Chick McGee]

You're my horn dog.

[Tom Griswold]

She's also on. Are you very active on Only Fans these days?

[Ali Breen]

I have not been. I'm gonna go off Only Fans. That's.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I bet the boyfriend doesn't like that.

[Josh Arnold]

Thank goodness I said good for you. I'm way off of Only Fans. It sucks.

[Chick McGee]

Now I've been through everything they have to offer. I'm done.

[Jess Hooker]

Why is it bad?

[Josh Arnold]

Because none of the girls are doing their own thing?

[Jess Hooker]

It's all companies to make it look like.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, it's the same thing happened with Austin and South by Southwest. It's all corporations.

[Josh Arnold]

Exactly. Been ruined.

[Ali Breen]

Let's get back to private equity taking over.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, it's privates equal equity now, Ali, what else have you got there?

[Ali Breen]

Dear Ally, I just found out that my boyfriend of six months had a relationship with a guy in college. He said he's not gay or even bisexual. He just had this connection with this one guy. Does that make any sense to anybody? I feel like he might be secretly gay. Right.

[Josh Arnold]

I, I honestly, I missed the first sentence or two.

[Tom Griswold]

The guy had a. The guy told her that he had a relationship with another guy.

[Josh Arnold]

A sexual relationship?

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

He's a little gay.

[Chick McGee]

Does it say sexual? Did they say sexual relationship?

[Tom Griswold]

I didn't catch that.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, okay.

[Christy Lee]

He said a relationship.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, my gosh. He's at least.

[Jess Hooker]

No, I'm out. Yeah. No. Yeah, he's gay. He doesn't want me now it's not

[Josh Arnold]

to say that he can't live the rest of his life. He can do whatever he wants in a closeted.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, that's true. He could.

[Christy Lee]

How would you feel if it were a woman and she said that?

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, it's fine.

[Josh Arnold]

I would. Well, but I mean, I would be okay with it, but I would also go, yeah, you're a little gay day.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, it's fine.

[Tom Griswold]

When you get in bed with them, do you have to bring tape and popsicle sticks to keep things, you know,

[Josh Arnold]

if that's the case, does he hold his nose and gag a lot?

[Jess Hooker]

How, how long into a relationship, like how long into a relationship would you be before you would tell a woman, hey, I had a boyfriend for a

[Josh Arnold]

little while, 35 years married, I'd say,

[Tom Griswold]

I'd say a fourth haircut that you're giving her.

[Chick McGee]

Remember the, remember, remember the fabulous Kevin Meaney said he think it's hard to come out to your parents? Try coming out to your wife.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, guys, it's. And Kevin was, Did you know Kevin, by the way, Ali?

[Ali Breen]

I met him. I didn't know him, but he was,

[Tom Griswold]

he was such, such a great guy and he, he was working on writing a one man show about that.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Situation in his life.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And oh God, if you go on, spend some time on YouTube watching his stuff.

[Josh Arnold]

His daughter works at the Comics Strip.

[Ali Breen]

Actually used to work at the Comic Strip. She doesn't anymore, but yeah. He has a daughter, Kate Meaney, who's probably working in a different comedy club now. I'm not sure. Yeah, she's great.

[Tom Griswold]

His first. Was it on his first appearance on Carson? Is that the one?

[Christy Lee]

You know, he's great.

[Tom Griswold]

It's just wonderful. Stellar. Check it out.

[Ali Breen]

Can you find his new, like the new material he was working on to make into a one man show? Is that online?

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know. A little bit of his on art was on our show. He talked about it. Well, I can dig that up. We get that.

[Josh Arnold]

He's always one of my favorites and I never got to meet him being selfish about it, but boy. Yeah, I love it.

[Tom Griswold]

He was such a good guy. He came in and guest hosted several times and great guy. Anyway, I'm sorry, now we got to get back to sexy time. What else is happening?

[Ali Breen]

Dear Ally, my boyfriend loves to play grab ass in the car. Like when we're stuck in traffic, he'll reach over and do stuff to me. Yeah, that's fine. But now he gets turned on when other people see it and he told me to actually make eye contact with a truck driver the other day while he was playing around.

[Pat Godwin]

No, no, no.

[Ali Breen]

That's a little much.

[Tom Griswold]

Tell him if he keeps doing it, you won't help him with his math homework. What a child.

[Ali Breen]

Now I'm worried he's doing deviant things when he's out on his own.

[Chick McGee]

I think we hit a nerve.

[Josh Arnold]

It does not. I do not. I think that's a jump that not particularly fair. He's not necessarily doing deviant things on his own. But he wants, he needs this. This is his thing. If you're not cool with it, you gotta lay down the law. And potentially this isn't gonna work.

[Tom Griswold]

Have him slow the car down so you can get out.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Remember, drop, drop and roll. Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Just remember, you can meet guys that don't want anything to do with that. And he can meet a girl who's way into it.

[Jess Hooker]

Yes, that's true.

[Christy Lee]

It's a lot for everybody.

[Tom Griswold]

A lot o fish in OC Our guest is the great comedian Ally Brain. Ally, I've got them. Tell me when you're going back to London. My nieces want to come see your show. And they both live there?

[Ali Breen]

Yeah, at the end of the month. But they won't give me. They don't do avails till the week of.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, now we have to get to our last letter, I think. What have you got, Ally?

[Ali Breen]

This is a quick one. I'm dating a 50 year old guy. He still takes a lot of bro golf vacation. Is that a real thing or is he out there cheating?

[Christy Lee]

That's a real thing.

[Jess Hooker]

That's a real thing.

[Christy Lee]

Totally a real thing.

[Josh Arnold]

Ask him. So he can leave you.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

In there in their 50s. I think they'd rather golf. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

Honestly, way less of a hassle. That's absolutely a thing.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, a lot of guys play golf.

[Chick McGee]

Sex for bowling. I changed my shoes last. Or the balls are heavier. Yeah, something like that. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, that's. That could be perfectly legit.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, that's perfectly legit. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Just depends where he's going. If he's, you know, if it's December 15th, he goes, we're going golfing in Alaska. Well, maybe.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

The 19th.

[Ali Breen]

There's a lot of Thailand golf trips. Yeah, there's a combination going on.

[Chick McGee]

Honey, it's the Walrus Open.

[Tom Griswold]

He was my caddy. I thought she was a he.

[Christy Lee]

Wait a minute.

[Josh Arnold]

Who hasn't been there?

[Chick McGee]

You get to that 18th hole now.

[Tom Griswold]

Ally, are you going to be renting the place you're painting right now? Is this one of Your real estate ventures?

[Ali Breen]

Yes, this is a real estate venture. I'll be renting it out. It's a place, it's called Ocala, though. It's like horse country in Florida. So it's not a very common place to travel.

[Tom Griswold]

Is this near Disney World?

[Ali Breen]

It's like an hour and 15 minutes from there, north of there, so not too far.

[Christy Lee]

Villages, right?

[Ali Breen]

It's close to the Villages. Yes. I'll be back here in July performing at the Villages.

[Chick McGee]

There you go.

[Ali Breen]

Staying back here.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, thanks, Ali. And once again, A L L I B R E E N Send Allie your love troubles and we'll fix them as you can see clearly.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Ali Breen]

Yes, we do a great job.

[Tom Griswold]

Thanks, Ali.

[Josh Arnold]

Bye, Ally.

[Tom Griswold]

I thought we did a good job today.

[Josh Arnold]

She really. Sometimes you see a person and they're in a new relationship and you can tell. And every time we talk to her now, she's hotter. It's. And it's just there's.

[Christy Lee]

She's just so.

[Josh Arnold]

There's something fun about her.

[Christy Lee]

She's got a glow.

[Jess Hooker]

She's real hot.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

And unattainable. Now maybe that's what makes her hot.

[Chick McGee]

Are you just the guy to go break that stuff up?

[Josh Arnold]

I'm not just saying tell her hotter. I'm saying like her energy is happier

[Tom Griswold]

and she's dropping her only fans thing.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Cuz that's good too.

[Tom Griswold]

She never got really into it.

[Josh Arnold]

No, no, it was very casual.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I never saw it, but I could tell by the way she talked about it she didn't really want.

[Josh Arnold]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

So that's cool. But yeah, her, I. I think it's great that she's doing comedy internationally.

[Jess Hooker]

Everything's going now.

[Chick McGee]

What about the language barrier you're doing in England like that?

[Josh Arnold]

That's tough. Yeah, yeah. She's got a bit about cigarettes.

[Tom Griswold]

That's.

[Josh Arnold]

That wouldn't play over here.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Right now I'm looking over that way because I'm seeing a photograph of me. That is. Nope, that's me.

[Jess Hooker]

And I can't see Roy Wood Jr. Christy and Chick.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, Chick. Okay, that's great.

[Josh Arnold]

Cropped out. You can see my arm.

[Jess Hooker]

Yep. I did it on purpose.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, be happy with it.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, there's Willie and then there's Josh. Not in that one either. Huh?

[Pat Godwin]

Cropped out again on the right.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. What I'm looking at is the aura frame. And as you can see, it's like a slideshow.

[Josh Arnold]

In fact, as you can see, he said.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, he's out of his mind.

[Tom Griswold]

25 years ago.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, look at this. Listen, listen. He's got a sound effect.

[Tom Griswold]

25 years ago, the aura frame would sound like this.

[Ali Breen]

Who.

[Jess Hooker]

Who gave him that?

[Chick McGee]

Those were the good old days, weren't they?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, exactly. He misses this.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, he sure does.

[Tom Griswold]

And you can see the light, the smoke.

[Chick McGee]

You know what else?

[Tom Griswold]

The light comes up off the project particles.

[Chick McGee]

You know what else he misses? Tonight at 9 on ABC. Yeah, that's what you miss.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, thanks very much. The aura frame is super cool. When I first saw one of these, I immediately bought one. And I have one in my house. When you first walk in and you can load it. I even loaded ours. I loaded this one here a little bit. Ms. Hooker did the rest of it. You can load it from a remote location.

[Chick McGee]

Is your aura frame right there next to the doghouse?

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, it's. It's. It's on the way to the dog room. When you first walk in the house. Okay. There's a little hallway.

[Josh Arnold]

I've also looked like 50 pictures.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, we all have.

[Tom Griswold]

The washing machine is. The washing machine is around the corner, and that's where the dogs are.

[Josh Arnold]

I just got a text from Aura. Can anyone else read these ads?

[Tom Griswold]

I'm not reading. I'm. You're communicating, creating.

[Josh Arnold]

Then put the piece of paper down.

[Tom Griswold]

This is the great. The. The aura frame is the perfect mother's day gift because you can preload it, and once you give it to that mom, you can. Maybe she lives in a different state you like. For example, your mother lives in Florida. Is that correct, Josh?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, she does.

[Tom Griswold]

So you could.

[Chick McGee]

You could.

[Tom Griswold]

You could give her Torah from frame, and then you could send her some clean pictures of you and the boys.

[Josh Arnold]

You know what we have.

[Tom Griswold]

Aha.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Then you should be doing this. You should be reading this commercial. But it's more than a commercial. I love this part.

[Josh Arnold]

No, we all do. Genuinely love these things.

[Tom Griswold]

How does it work? Well, you will load it up with unlimited videos and photographs. There's no monthly fee or anything. Once you get it, it's yours. And it was named number one by wirecutter. And so it's a great gift.

[Josh Arnold]

You can also put videos on there, so you could say, hey, mom, I love you. Hope you have a great week.

[Tom Griswold]

And you get 25 bucks off.

[Chick McGee]

And I tell you, moms grandma you send it to. They get up in the morning to check, see if they got new Every morning.

[Tom Griswold]

They do that right now, 25 bucks off the famous carver mat frame, which is that one over there. If you use the code word Tom and you get them by going to aura frames.com promo code is Tom. Support us by mentioning the Bob and Tom show, please. This is a great gift. I am a huge fan, man, and I'm not just saying that. I have one right inside my house, and I love it. And it's got lots and lots of cool. There's even some pictures of you guys on there.

[Christy Lee]

Really?

[Josh Arnold]

That's sweet.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, they're all of Josh.

[Tom Griswold]

We know they're not all of Joe.

[Pat Godwin]

They just broke up last break.

[Chick McGee]

You know, I know you guys are

[Josh Arnold]

next to me and some of the pictures.

[Chick McGee]

She's just. She's right. They're all Josh.

[Tom Griswold]

What about when we come back?

[Chick McGee]

Did you have a song for us?

[Pat Godwin]

Sure.

[Tom Griswold]

Do you have a song to go it on, Pat?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Pat Godwin]

I got Josh.

[Chick McGee]

Hate you.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Once again, These are the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Thanks for joining us. This is the Bob and Tom Show. Got a comment to share? Text us at 888-262-8661. This is the Bob and Tom Show. Thank you.

[Chick McGee]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom show. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts studios. Thank O'Reilly Auto Parts for all. All your car care needs. Get the parts and service you need fast from the professional parts people at O'Reilly Auto Parts. There's Christy Lee.

[Christy Lee]

Hi.

[Chick McGee]

Hi. She's at the news desk. There's Pat Godwin.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello.

[Chick McGee]

Hello. He's at the music desk. There's Jess Hooker.

[Jess Hooker]

Hello.

[Chick McGee]

There's Josh Arnold.

[Josh Arnold]

Hi.

[Chick McGee]

Ace Cosby.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, there.

[Chick McGee]

I'm Chick McGee. And. Hello, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello, Chick McGee. And we thought we'd do another song out of Patty G. Is that right?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, absolutely.

[Tom Griswold]

You're interested in playing a bit little. Little something for us? You got your guitar over there? What's happening?

[Pat Godwin]

Christie was in here during a couple of breaks talking about Andy. Andy, Andy, Andy. Her husband and her husband Andy. And Tom had said, geez, you've never mentioned other husbands like, you mentioned Andy.

[Christy Lee]

Because I love Andy.

[Pat Godwin]

So in love. So I thought we'd dust this one off maybe two or three years old. A little tribute now that Tom is married. Give it up for Tom being married.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you.

[Pat Godwin]

Incredible. In case you haven't heard about Christy Lee, she got married to Andy. When he proposed, she said, what the hell's one more. Welcome to the family. Christy's husband number four.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm sorry.

[Pat Godwin]

Her first three marriages just didn't stick. Christy was over three and tied with Chick. Now Chick wants a date. And even after school, who will Win the title of Chick's ex wife number four.

[Chick McGee]

I need a hearty farm woman.

[Pat Godwin]

Say half of marriages will end in divorce. That number seems too low. I need to find out the source. Our show is nine for nine, including my two. Of course. Tom's married now.

[Josh Arnold]

Cause he's hung like a horse.

[Pat Godwin]

Forget the odds. We wish you both the best.

[Chick McGee]

Thank you.

[Pat Godwin]

We know your love is going to pass the test. But just in case a dozen and Christie's marriage takes a dive, may we suggest Josh Arnold for your husband number five. Your husband number five.

[Christy Lee]

Come here, sweetie.

[Tom Griswold]

That's great, Pat. Thank you very much.

[Christy Lee]

Three years coming up next month.

[Chick McGee]

Lollipop.

[Pat Godwin]

That's amazing.

[Tom Griswold]

Christy, was there a. I'm trying to find. I'm reading this article again about this sperm racing contest.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I know this sounds completely ridiculous, but this is a real thing. And I guess this is the third one. Did it say when it was happening?

[Christy Lee]

Chick had it. He gave it to me.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Chick McGee]

It does not say when it's happening.

[Tom Griswold]

This is a different version of. It says 128 semen samples from 128 different countries.

[Chick McGee]

Let's see. $100,000 prize pool. Competitors go head to head with their sperm samples. Microscopic racetrack.

[Tom Griswold]

And it's based on these.

[Chick McGee]

Does not say when.

[Christy Lee]

This is later this year.

[Tom Griswold]

The particular sperm that swims the fastest will win $100,000.

[Josh Arnold]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

It's a microscope will time them and it'll be projected onto the wall. It says here.

[Jess Hooker]

How do you condition for that?

[Christy Lee]

I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

Here's what I don't understand. I don't get if there's 128 entrants. Do they. Do they all have to come in.

[Christy Lee]

You have to be 18 years of older or older for sexually transmitted disease diseases.

[Tom Griswold]

But do they have to get it fresh?

[Christy Lee]

Able to provide biological samples in compliance with competition regulations. Available to appear in recorded content and competition coverage.

[Josh Arnold]

You know, that's a good question, Tom. Does it have to be. When can it be?

[Tom Griswold]

Can they thaw it out?

[Josh Arnold]

Right. Right. I don't think so.

[Jess Hooker]

Because.

[Tom Griswold]

So it's got to be fresh. In other words.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah. When you have a vasectomy, you have to trans like you can. You can get the specimen at home and you only have X amount of time to get it to the doctor for them to test and make sure that the vasectomy.

[Tom Griswold]

But does the speed of it motility is it.

[Jess Hooker]

I feel like it best when it's

[Tom Griswold]

fresh from the tap.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. The fresher it is, the faster you'd think so.

[Josh Arnold]

You think they'd be a little more lively?

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

So are they going to have 128 guys lined up? And there's the green room. No longer green. The cream room.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, tell me.

[Josh Arnold]

In the white room. And are spanking their own.

[Ali Breen]

What?

[Christy Lee]

Where does the money come? Who's paying for this?

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, it must have sponsorship or entry fees.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, It's. It was $10,000. It looks like this other article last year, and apparently it's men's health organizations. Maybe they're selling services. I don't know.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Is it like, on your mark, get set. Oh, sorry. That was, that was too quick. We have to find out more. But this article doesn't say when it's taking place.

[Christy Lee]

Just says later this year.

[Jess Hooker]

Okay, if I find out when it is, will you send me. Can I report from the sperm?

[Tom Griswold]

It says it's in San Francisco. You want to go to San Francisco? Sure.

[Jess Hooker]

How long?

[Chick McGee]

Everybody, you're looking live.

[Christy Lee]

It's gonna be a quick report.

[Tom Griswold]

And, and this particular article says at an undisclosed location.

[Christy Lee]

We don't have one yet.

[Chick McGee]

You don't want go.

[Tom Griswold]

What a weird thing. Apparently, it's all for Men's Health, so. Okay, that's very nice. Well, thanks for joining us, everybody. On a serious note, we have put a link up to a very heartfelt and wonderful tribute to Bob from Pat McAfee from his show yesterday.

[Josh Arnold]

Very nice.

[Tom Griswold]

And there's a clip of it. Pretty much that whole clip is linked if you go to Bob and tom dot com. So very cool, Pat. And. And if you get a chance, watch that. And it's really. I just great. And you can tell Pat's really was shaken up. So now on a much lighter note, we will be returning tomorrow with a very interesting story about the world of monks. So I've got a feeling we may be getting a Pat Godwin song. Hey, hey, we're the Monks again. Which again, I'm certain looking forward to. I'm a big fan. And also, so we have in the news things you don't want to do at a Target store. Once again, These are the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios, and this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Pat Godwin]

Thanks for listening to the Bob and

[Tom Griswold]

Tom show this morning. The show is also out there for you on our YouTube channel. Watch and subscribe. This is the Bob and Tom show,

[Pat Godwin]

the Hammer Alley podcast, an 80s flashback mockumentary.

[Tom Griswold]

Back in the 80s, there were a few thousand bands trying to make it in the world of rock, but there was one band that had it all. Hammer Alley. Whatever happened to Hammer Alley?

[Josh Arnold]

How did they go from top of the Rock?

[Pat Godwin]

I'm looking for a music video. They're a band from 1987.

[Josh Arnold]

Hammer Alley.

[Tom Griswold]

Ever heard of them?

[Pat Godwin]

To rock bottom.

[Tom Griswold]

Dude, I was born in 1987.

[Ali Breen]

I can't believe he's doing this.

[Chick McGee]

Hammer Alley.

[Tom Griswold]

Follow and listen on your favorite platform.