The BOB & TOM Show - August 13, 2025

Summary

Podcast Summary: The BOB & TOM Show - August 13, 2025

Hosts: The BOB & TOM Show | Cumulus Podcast Network
Description: A blend of comedy, talk, news, and sports, aired nationwide from 6 to 10 AM EST.
Episode Duration: Approximately 2 hours and 43 minutes

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I. Introduction and Housekeeping

The episode begins with a musical skit featuring Bob and Tom, setting a lighthearted and comedic tone. Following this, the hosts introduce themselves and acknowledge their co-hosts and guests, establishing the familiar camaraderie that listeners enjoy.

II. Swingers Club Anecdote with Jeff Oskay [14:07]

Guest: Comedian Jeff Oskay

Jeff shares an elaborate and humorous story about his experience visiting a swingers club about 20 years ago. He describes the initial confusion of entering what appeared to be a regular office building, only to find a multi-story facility filled with various social and recreational areas.

• Notable Quote:
  Jeff Oskay [21:08]: “There were some nude, some completely clothed, some in lingerie, and all over the place.”

The story includes encounters with both attractive and unabashed individuals, the presence of amenities like hot tubs and dance floors, and humorous mishaps involving pets and personal belongings.

• Notable Quote:
  Jeff Oskay [25:22]: “There were DJs on each floor playing music, and people even danced while eating cupcakes.”

III. Pet Stories and Dog Behavior

The hosts delve into discussions about their pets, focusing particularly on dogs' quirky behaviors. Tom recounts an incident where his dog interacted fearfully with the dishwasher, leading to a humorous recount of household pet antics.

• Notable Quote:
  Tom Griswold [07:50]: “When I'm doing the dishes, the dogs come over and start licking all over the dishwasher, thinking it's a leftovers presentation.”

IV. Soap Recall and Safety News [96:21]

Reporter: Christy Lee

Christy reports on a significant recall issued by DermaClean, a manufacturer of foaming hand soaps. The company is recalling several lots of their products due to contamination with Pseudomonas aeruginosa, a harmful bacterium that can cause severe infections, especially in individuals with weakened immune systems.

• Notable Quote:
  Christy Lee [96:31]: “It may lead to bloodstream infections or sepsis. If you purchased these products, stop using them immediately and seek a refund.”

V. Discussion on Anal Botox

The conversation shifts to a controversial and humorous topic: anal Botox. Dr. Bitta Farrell discusses an off-label procedure called "Holtox" used to treat chronic constipation by relaxing the sphincter muscles.

• Notable Quote:
  Christy Lee [81:08]: “It relaxes the sphincter muscle, which relieves spasms and restores proper function to the anus.”

The hosts and guests engage in a playful yet informative discussion about the procedure's benefits and risks, blending medical facts with comedic banter.

VI. Listener Letters and Stories

Throughout the episode, Bob and Tom read and respond to various letters from listeners, covering diverse topics from humorous myths to personal anecdotes.

• Example Letter:
  Chick McGee [35:06]: “He skinned the squirrel, split it down the middle, filled it with taters and onions, and topped it with an Italian sausage, turning the squirrel into a makeshift hot dog bun.”

The hosts humorously dissect these stories, offering their takeaways and engaging in witty exchanges.

VII. Fishing Stories: Alligator and Other Fish Tales

Reporter: Christy Lee

Christy shares a captivating story about a fisherman, Ricky Sanchez, who accidentally hooked an alligator while kayaking at Magnolia Lake in Bucks County, Pennsylvania. The video footage of the encounter went viral, prompting local wildlife experts to intervene and safely capture the reptile.

• Notable Quote:
  Christy Lee [128:55]: “Lifeguards brave strong waves to rescue the animal, ensuring it was safely relocated to a sanctuary.”

The segment highlights the unpredictable nature of fishing and the importance of wildlife conservation.

VIII. Graffiti in Bathrooms

A listener poses an intriguing question about the difference in graffiti content between men's and women's restrooms. The discussion explores societal norms and behaviors reflected in such informal public art.

• Notable Quote:
  Tom Griswold [58:31]: “Is there a lot of positivity in the women's restroom graffiti compared to the men's? Not necessarily.”

The hosts analyze how different environments influence the nature of graffiti, balancing observations with humor.

IX. Music in Movies and Guilty Pleasure Songs

The conversation transitions to the pervasive use of popular songs in films and the concept of "guilty pleasure" tracks that listeners enjoy despite potential embarrassment.

• Notable Quote:
  Chick McGee [67:42]: “All Star by Smash Mouth has been in like four movies in one year.”

The hosts debate the effectiveness and frequency of such songs in enhancing movie scenes, reminiscing about classic tunes and their cinematic associations.

X. Sports News: UFC and Shark Sightings

Reporter: Christy Lee

Christy brings in sports-related news, including a major rights deal between UFC and Paramount, and an exciting announcement of a planned UFC fight at the White House on the Fourth of July.

• Notable Quote:
  Bob [86:41]: “UFC CEO Dana White is set to meet with President Donald Trump to discuss a proposed Fourth of July fight card at the White House.”

Additionally, Christy reports on the spotting of a great white shark off the coast of Maine, adding to the ongoing discussion about marine wildlife.

XI. Sponsor Messages and Ads

Throughout the episode, several sponsors are acknowledged, including Progressive Insurance, Simply Safe, BetterHelp, Raycon Earbuds, and O’Reilly Auto Parts. These segments are seamlessly integrated into the conversation, providing listeners with valuable deals and information.

• Example Quote:
  Bob [12:07]: “Simply Safe is protecting us here at the studio. Visit simplysafe.tom.com for an exclusive 50% off.”

XII. Conclusion and Final Segments

As the show nears its end, the hosts continue to engage with guests and share final thoughts on various topics, maintaining the show's signature blend of humor, information, and listener interaction.

• Notable Quote:
  Tom Griswold [141:48]: “This is in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios, where we're part of your morning routine.”

The episode concludes with a mix of light-hearted banter, last-minute stories, and reminders of upcoming segments, leaving listeners entertained and informed.

---

Highlights:

• Swingers Club Story: Jeff Oskay's detailed and humorous recount of a swingers club experience.
• Soap Recall: Important safety information about DermaClean hand soaps contaminated with harmful bacteria.
• Anal Botox Discussion: A blend of medical insights and comedy surrounding an unconventional procedure.
• Fishing and Wildlife Encounters: Engaging stories about unexpected animal interactions during fishing trips.
• Listener Engagement: Interactive segments with letters addressing a wide range of topics, infused with the hosts' comedic flair.
• Sports Updates: Significant news in the sports world, including UFC's major deal and unique fight announcements.

Notable Quotes with Timestamps:

• Jeff Oskay [21:08]: “There were some nude, some completely clothed, some in lingerie, and all over the place.”
• Tom Griswold [07:50]: “When I'm doing the dishes, the dogs come over and start licking all over the dishwasher, thinking it's a leftovers presentation.”
• Christy Lee [96:31]: “It may lead to bloodstream infections or sepsis. If you purchased these products, stop using them immediately and seek a refund.”
• Christy Lee [81:08]: “It relaxes the sphincter muscle, which relieves spasms and restores proper function to the anus.”
• Tom Griswold [14:07]: “We are going to return to the Swingers Club with Jeff. I can't wait to hear what happened here in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios.”

This episode of The BOB & TOM Show masterfully combines comedy, personal anecdotes, informative segments, and listener interaction, delivering an engaging and entertaining experience for both regular listeners and newcomers.

Transcript

[Christy Lee]

This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. You chose to hit play on this podcast today. Smart choice. Progressive loves to help people make smart choices. That's why they offer a tool called Auto Quote Explorer that allows you to compare your Progressive Car Insurance quote with rates from other companies. So you save time on the research and can enjoy savings when you choose the best rate for you. Give it a try after this [e-mail] Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates not available in all states or situations. Prices vary based on how you buy.

[Bob]

It's the Bob and Tom Show. Hey, pally, it looks like your girls have dumped us.

[Tom Griswold]

They're taking speed too. Dean.

[Bob]

Baby, blow me a kiss as you're leaving Blow me oh, a kiss right now?

[Tom Griswold]

Cause if you're gonna leave me, honey, whoa, I'll surely miss the way you.

[Bob]

Blow me, blow me a kiss Come.

[Tom Griswold]

On and blow me kiss like you mean Blow me a kiss goodbye.

[Bob]

I really can't remember anything as hard as this so blow me, blow me a kiss Chasm. Some things in life are hard to swallow.

[Tom Griswold]

She couldn't take it all, Dean.

[Bob]

She couldn't handle everything.

[Tom Griswold]

Are you kidding? You monster.

[Bob]

But if she comes back tomorrow, I'll be shooting my wad on flowers and the ring money.

[Tom Griswold]

Blow me a kiss as you're leaving.

[Bob]

Blow me, oh, a kiss as you go.

[Tom Griswold]

And always think about me as you're going down your list Blow me, blow.

[Bob]

Me a kiss oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I'll miss her arms and her elbows.

[Bob]

He'll miss her legs so tall.

[Tom Griswold]

I'll miss her neck and her shoulders.

[Bob]

But I'll miss her head most to.

[Chick McGee]

Them all go down, boys.

[Bob]

Mr. Royce Camel on guitar, ladies and gentlemen. I loved it when he sang Rhinestone Cowboy, didn't you, Valley?

[Tom Griswold]

That was Glenn Campbell.

[Bob]

Blow me sad you're leaving Baby blond I guess as you go here's the big finish. And if you wanna come home, honey, hey, that's okay. Just grab ahold of this and baby.

[Tom Griswold]

Blow me Baby, won't you blow me, blow me again. Arcing darky. Receiving high them jazz.

[Bob]

Certainly some vocal gymnastics there. My goodness, Grab a hold of this. Hi, it's Bob a Tom Show. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Christy Lee at the Silac Insurance news desk.

[Christy Lee]

Hey, Chick.

[Bob]

Pat Godwin on assignment. There's Josh Arnold.

[Chick McGee]

Hi there.

[Bob]

Ace Cosby. Hello, I am Chick McGee. And Tom, of course, already sitting quietly. But then as soon as we start talking, he's a flurry of activity. He's using lint, brushes he's got his lint roller. He's working on his shirt and his workstation.

[Tom Griswold]

It's a simple formula. A white dog, black shirt. Just noticed this.

[Bob]

Oh, I thought it was simple formula. I got act busy. Okay. We're all got act busy.

[Tom Griswold]

I got a quick look.

[Bob]

I got to do something.

[Tom Griswold]

Saw some dog fur.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, it'll happen.

[Tom Griswold]

And I thought I would do the right thing. Gotta look presentable for everyone this morning, huh? Even though this is radio. Although we are on YouTube. We're on the YouTube thing. Yeah. Very good. Now, a lot going on today and.

[Bob]

You'Re very excited and looking forward to stuff.

[Tom Griswold]

Yep, I am. We've got. We've got sexy time with Ali Breen.

[Bob]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

At a revelatory moment in my culinary life.

[Christy Lee]

Uh.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, good.

[Christy Lee]

What?

[Chick McGee]

Always nice to shake things up.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. What'd you put in your mouth last night? We had kind of a sandwich bar for dinner.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Cool.

[Bob]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

It's nice. Optional bread, bacon, turkey.

[Bob]

Yeah, that's a sandwich.

[Christy Lee]

Avocado.

[Tom Griswold]

And I ended up throwing pickles on a club sandwich and I. It was amazing.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

I can't believe I've gone this long without doing that.

[Bob]

We've been on a club.

[Tom Griswold]

You said it was great.

[Christy Lee]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

Really, really delightful.

[Bob]

Seems a little. Pretty standard.

[Tom Griswold]

It did make it life great. Just. Just moving stuff around just a little bit. And just a quick tip, like, we.

[Bob]

Talk a lot about food, you regular listeners. You realize Tom, a couple weeks ago discovered the joy of a rolling carry on at the airport.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, it's amazing.

[Bob]

Amazing. 90% of people use those now, he announced.

[Tom Griswold]

What in your life, Chick McGee, have you had. You never eaten until recently that you found recently?

[Bob]

Oh, I don't know. Anything.

[Tom Griswold]

Anything new?

[Bob]

No, not really. I mean, well, that yogurt thing, I like that. There's a strawberry yogurt I like, was loaded with protein or something. I was never really a big yogurt guy.

[Tom Griswold]

Chrissy, anything you've discovered recently? Tomatoes.

[Christy Lee]

I would not eat a tomato ever, ever, ever, ever. And now, especially this time of year, I love like pre. Say salads or I'll put it in a salad, I'll put it on a sandwich. Never did that before.

[Bob]

I just had a Caprese salad a couple nights ago.

[Christy Lee]

Good stuff.

[Bob]

Delicious.

[Tom Griswold]

Good, delicious. Sounds like one of the guys in Goodfellows, doesn't it?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Hey, Capresi, my neighbor's got these tall basil plants, so I go over there almost every day at night when the lights steal them. Yeah, he will never miss. He's Got eight of them.

[Chick McGee]

They'll never miss them.

[Christy Lee]

He's never gonna miss my five leaves.

[Bob]

He's stingy.

[Chick McGee]

The thief's lament.

[Tom Griswold]

They'll never miss this.

[Christy Lee]

I was gonna miss five leaves of basil.

[Tom Griswold]

The sound of a shotgun cocking.

[Bob]

I put yogurt on the puppy dog's licking pads. You try one of these. A licking pad.

[Tom Griswold]

What's that?

[Bob]

It's a pad you put like I put peanut butter and yogurt, and I crush up peanut butter, pretzels, and all sorts of things.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, cool.

[Bob]

It's a pad with suction cups on the back. You put it on the floor.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Bob]

And they come by and they lick.

[Christy Lee]

Keeps them. It keeps them entertained, keeps them interested.

[Bob]

And keeps them thinking.

[Tom Griswold]

And I get that. I had an incident with a dog. How do I explain this? When I'm doing the dishes, the. You have the dishwasher open, you start stacking stuff in there, and the dogs come over, they'll start licking all over the dishwasher.

[Christy Lee]

Well, your dogs do. My are not allowed to do that.

[Tom Griswold]

It's. They. They don't understand that it's a dishwasher. They think it's some kind of. Oh, it's time for our leftovers presentation.

[Bob]

So how are they going to know? You're not going to tell them? You're not.

[Tom Griswold]

Big golden retriever. The big golden retriever has a chain collar, and a couple nights ago, he managed to somehow get the loop on it. The ring caught on the lower tray of the dishwasher, which frightened him, and.

[Bob]

He backed out and pulled the tray out.

[Tom Griswold]

That tray comes all the way out, and it also goes halfway across to the living room with several dishes in it.

[Bob]

That's. That's one of the classic people falling and hurting themselves videos. A dog getting a hold of the dishwasher.

[Tom Griswold]

It was stuck to him, and he was terrified.

[Bob]

He kept running and kept following him.

[Tom Griswold]

And I finally got him to calm down, and it took quite a while to unhook the thing.

[Christy Lee]

Oh.

[Tom Griswold]

But that didn't stop him last night from going back to his old tricks.

[Bob]

Really?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. They love that. They. They just.

[Bob]

You know, my. My oldest girl is going to be 13 in 13 days. And I don't know when it happened, but I must have accidentally shut the door on her when she was running into the house at one point. And now ever since, 12 of her years, she comes up to the door and she'll make sure, I'm gonna leave the door open. She doesn't take anything for chan man. It's just like, okay, all right. Doesn't want to chance it.

[Tom Griswold]

And she recognizes the potential danger.

[Bob]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

That's a smart gal.

[Bob]

But evidently you. You have one that didn't care. He likes those leftovers. He went right back to the dishwasher.

[Tom Griswold]

He tends to be somewhat food oriented, but. Poor guy was. I was kind of scared.

[Bob]

You break some dishes?

[Tom Griswold]

Nothing broke.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, that's good.

[Christy Lee]

That's good.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but there was stuff everywhere and. Yeah, that. That thing comes all the way out.

[Christy Lee]

Yep.

[Tom Griswold]

Good thing. Okay. Speaking of food, yesterday we were talking about eggs. Did you know. Here's an obscure trivia fact, Josh, you may know this. Do you know that there was a distinguished film director that couldn't be around eggs?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, if I've heard that, I don't remember it.

[Tom Griswold]

Alfred Hitchcock really didn't.

[Chick McGee]

Didn't care for eggs.

[Tom Griswold]

That's crazy, huh?

[Chick McGee]

Of all things, making the birds.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Bob]

Didn't. Didn't like them to order them and couldn't be around, apparently.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. Found them utterly disgusting.

[Chick McGee]

Interesting.

[Christy Lee]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. And the only reason I know that is Hitchcock is in the news coming up a little bit later on this morning. Oh, I was saying yesterday that the underrated egg is the poached egg. I'm a big fan.

[Bob]

And you don't like ketchup on your eggs?

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, I do not. I understand.

[Bob]

Just like you like pickles. Last night on your club.

[Tom Griswold]

I could try it.

[Bob]

Give it a shot.

[Tom Griswold]

Frank's Red Hot. Might be. Might be the way to go.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I love that.

[Tom Griswold]

But I was saying, the only thing I've ever bought off one of those television commercials was the egg poaching device.

[Christy Lee]

Yes. And you said it was terrible.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, it was impossible to clean. This comes to us from Kim, who, by the way, lives in Georgia and is interested in Pat Godwin.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, why wouldn't she be?

[Tom Griswold]

She's one of the few Kims he's never dated or married. Those of you familiar with Patty and.

[Bob]

And by the way, if your name's Kim, Pat will get to you. He's doing the best he can.

[Tom Griswold]

And in all truth, he did have a Kim tattoo that he had covered up and then ended up marrying another Kim.

[Christy Lee]

Yep.

[Bob]

So what are the.

[Tom Griswold]

Should have waited. Yeah. This Kim suggests silicon. Silicone poached egg molds are the game changer. I'll have to give them a shot.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

She says spray them. Spray them with oil before you use them, and that'll solve my problem. Well, it's certainly good to know. Although cooking tips.

[Bob]

They cook up real nice. You Just drop them in the water.

[Tom Griswold]

They do.

[Bob]

And they kind of congeal and stay together. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

They have kind of galactic spreading out. That's kind of.

[Chick McGee]

I have a pampered chef. It's a ceramic thing. Put a little water in there. And the egg. 45 seconds. You have a perfectly poached egg. I love it so much.

[Christy Lee]

Microwave.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Bob]

You had that. I don't know what it was. You sat the eggs in there and what was it, three minutes and it was a hard boiled egg.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, yeah. It's a little longer than that, but.

[Bob]

Yes, it was amazing.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

That a microwave thing?

[Chick McGee]

No, somebody. In fact, I brought one in here and it's missing, so.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, it's like its own little thing. And you plugged it into the wall or something.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. And you could, you could cook, you could hard boil up to 12 eggs in it if you wanted at once.

[Bob]

It was amazing.

[Tom Griswold]

Coming up, we'll have Sporting news. We'll have your letters about whatever you want to talk about. You can reach us Bob and Tom at bob and tom.com. also coming up, sexy time with comedian Ali Breen as we help you with your love life. But right now we're going to check in with Mr. McGee and simply safe.

[Bob]

That's right. Simply Safe is a system that works to prevent a break in from even happening. We use Simplisafe here at the Bob and Tom studios. Most security systems only take action after somebody's already broken in. That is way too late, my friends. Simplisafe has new active guard outdoor protection that helps stop break ins before they happen. AI powered cameras, live monitoring agents detect suspicious activity around your property. If someone's lurking, agents talk to them in real time. They have access to spotlights. They can call the police proactively deterring crime before it even starts. No contracts, no hidden fees. Simplisafe name best home security system of 2025 by CNET. 4 million plus Americans Trust. SimpliSafe monitoring plans start around a dollar a day. But listen to this deal we have for you. Visit simplisafetom.com and you get 50% off a new system with a professional monitoring plan and your first month free. 50 off, first month free. Go to simply safe tom.com there's no safe. Like simply said, thank you very much.

[Tom Griswold]

I have been told that I missed a story when I was on vacation from Mr. Oscar and I have. I'm going to bring him on in here, okay? And find out exactly what happened. Apparently it involves Jeffrey and his lady going to a swingers club.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, you did miss that.

[Bob]

That was a big time highlight. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

By request it's going to be. We're going to return to the Swingers Club with Jeff. I can't wait to hear what happened here in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios, where this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Chick McGee]

This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you ever think about switching insurance companies to see if you could save some cash? Progressive makes it easy. Just drop in some details about yourself and see if you're eligible to save money. When you bundle your home in auto policy, the process only takes minutes and it could mean hundreds more in your pocket. Visit progressive.com after this episode to see if you could save Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. Potential savings will vary. Not available in all states.

[Bob]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom show. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts studios. Think O'Reilly Auto Parts for all your car care needs. Get the parts and service you need fast from the professional parts people at O'Reilly Auto Parts. There's Christy Lee.

[Christy Lee]

Hello.

[Bob]

There's Jeff Oskay.

[Jeff Oskay]

Hey, buddy.

[Bob]

Hello, Josh. Arnold.

[Chick McGee]

Hi there.

[Bob]

It's Ace Cosby. I'm Chick mcgee. Hello, Tom. Have you had some. Had some caffeine this morning?

[Tom Griswold]

A little bit, yeah. Why do you ask?

[Bob]

Christy was talking to you and you went, thanks very much, Chris and.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, sure.

[Bob]

No, no, no. He did it again.

[Tom Griswold]

Slow it down. They're very good.

[Christy Lee]

Deep breath.

[Tom Griswold]

Ran some watermelon for you guys this morning.

[Bob]

Mature.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, thanks.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you.

[Chick McGee]

Yummy to give that a try.

[Tom Griswold]

Watermelon, some bagels, some cream cheese. We got it all going here.

[Bob]

Watermelon and bagels. You get a nice thin slab of watermelon on your bagel, man. Finest kind.

[Tom Griswold]

A couple points of clarity here.

[Bob]

Seedless. Seedless watermelon.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, yes. Well, there's like an occasional seed.

[Bob]

I mean, what do you. Well, is it seedless or not?

[Chick McGee]

That's not Tom's fault, though. They should call seedless watermelons kind of seedless. Yeah, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Because they all have seeds, right?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but I think, you know, 20th century America or what? A 21st century America. We've done pretty well with our watermelon. This is a. This is one of those black diamond watermelons.

[Christy Lee]

Not familiar with those.

[Tom Griswold]

It's just like a regular watermelon, but it costs twice. Oh, they're. They're delicious. Check local listings. I want to clarify something from yesterday's program. We had a nice letter from Candia.

[Bob]

Are they square?

[Tom Griswold]

Watermelon no, they're not square watermelons. That's a Japanese thing.

[Bob]

So there's. They're not square. They've got seeds. Why are they black diamonds? What makes them black diamonds? What makes them the best watermelons ever?

[Jeff Oskay]

They're hard to ski down.

[Tom Griswold]

You. You asked for it last.

[Bob]

I get an answer.

[Tom Griswold]

You got it. We had a letter from Candia. We were trying to figure out what was going on with that name. She says, I am in fact a woman.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

We were wondering, I mean, Candia could be some kind of foreign name.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Who knows?

[Tom Griswold]

Be like name being named Brent in Latvia. I don't know. In any event, she says, all right. My parents actually, actually considered naming me Candida.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

But it was one of those popular names then, so they dropped the second D. Oh, popular where? I think maybe because. Yeah. Did you. Have you ever heard that song? Here's a little taste of it.

[Bob]

The further from here, girl, the better. Is fresh and clean.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, that. What a. Tony Orlando.

[Bob]

And it's kind of Neil Diamond. I never noticed that.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, they had. They had an equation they worked with, didn't they?

[Bob]

They sure did.

[Chick McGee]

Why, why mess with a good thing?

[Bob]

Yeah, I just saw some video of Tony Orlando Yesterday and from 2024, 2025, and Thelma Hopkins and the other one.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Bob]

Singing right behind him.

[Chick McGee]

I still got it, huh?

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

There you go. And what is the other big hit? Oh, Knock three times.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, I mean, that's. You can plug those lyrics right into that and tie a yellow ribbon.

[Bob]

He don't love you like I love you.

[Tom Griswold]

In any event, Candy, thank you so much for the, the, the letter. I've got another letter here and I'm glad you're in the room with us, Jeffrey. Comedian Jeff Oskay has joined us.

[Jeff Oskay]

Dear Tom, thank you, everyone. Wow, that's wonderful. Thank you.

[Tom Griswold]

Dear Tom, while you were on vacation, Jeff Oskay told the story about going to a swingers club with his lady. Could you please have him tell that again?

[Jeff Oskay]

I. It. Not my current lady. This was years and years. I mean, this was 20 some years ago.

[Bob]

You telling this story last week and now you having to say, not my current lady. Were you approached by your current lady and said, hey, everybody thinks it's me?

[Jeff Oskay]

Well, she, I mean, she's aware of the story, like, so she's fine with it, but okay.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, that happens to all of us.

[Bob]

I could see that having a big problem occur in the household.

[Tom Griswold]

Occasionally you'll have to adjust a story.

[Jeff Oskay]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

I'll say, oh, over the weekend I was out of town. And then I'll tell a story that actually happened a mile from my house.

[Jeff Oskay]

What?

[Christy Lee]

What?

[Bob]

Well, you're just. You're just a liar then, right?

[Christy Lee]

Heck is that.

[Tom Griswold]

You know what I'm saying? If. Christy, if you have some story about a restaurant or something, and it's pretty obvious where it is, and you, as a courtesy, it's like when you see in a book some of the names have been changed to protect the guilty or whatever.

[Chick McGee]

But in Jeff's defense, he. He said this happened years ago with a different woman when he told us this story.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm just trying to clarify so you don't get in any more trouble.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, no, yeah, it's. It's all good.

[Bob]

You know how people hear things.

[Jeff Oskay]

I think my parents were more disturbed than anyone.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. That probably dumbed them out.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And what was the story?

[Jeff Oskay]

I don't know how it came up, but back 20, 30 years ago, me and my. The lady I was dating, a friend of ours talked about going to the swingers club, and we thought it would be hilarious to go check this out. And I think I was 25 at the time. We were like 25, 23. And it was here in the city in a downtown office building that was four stories tall, and from the outside it just looked like a normal office building. But you went to the front door and you knocked and you had to give the password, and you walked down this long hall and you paid like $100. And they're like, oh, is this your first time here? And yes. And they give you a tour of this four story facility which had over a thousand people in it. Some nude, some completely. Clothes, just dongs, a swinging breast, a bouncing and all over the place.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Jeff Oskay]

Three dance floors. One, one on each floor. They had lockers that you could put your clothes in. They had hot tubs, they had what was called a confessional room, which really bothers me, which had a bunch of kneelers on one side and a bunch of no standards on the other side.

[Bob]

Kneelers accommodators on the other side.

[Christy Lee]

That's better than handing out name pads at the door.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Like a line of people on their knees.

[Chick McGee]

Well, yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

Like, you could. Either your lady could be on one side and you go on the other, or you could just go on the other and see who knelt on the other side.

[Chick McGee]

Mystery. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah. What was the. What was the.

[Bob]

Remember in the back of those magazines when we were kids? It had a package with question marks all around it and it was the mystery package. It's the same thing. You don't know who's servicing you on the other side.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Oh, dear God. What was the. If one had to. On a scale of, say, 1 to 10, grade the attractiveness level. On a superficial level?

[Jeff Oskay]

Solid 5 across the board. Yeah. Average. We were the youngest people in the place by, like 20 years. That shocks me, which brought us a lot of attention that we weren't looking for.

[Tom Griswold]

What do we do here?

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, what gave it away? We don't have gray hair.

[Bob]

Were you.

[Tom Griswold]

Were you clothed?

[Jeff Oskay]

Yes, we were completely clothed, but some of the people who spoke with us were completely naked and somewhere in lingerie.

[Christy Lee]

Did they invite you to participate?

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, at one time we were sitting on a couch enjoying a lovely beverage. You would bring your own alcohol, and they had bartenders and bars on every level, and you would give them the alcohol and they would mix your drinks for you throughout the night. And we were sitting on the couch and a man completely naked walked up and was like, would your lady prefer a massage? Would she like a lovely massage? And I go, would you like a lovely massage? And she said, no, thank you. And his thing knocked her beer bottle over and he walked away.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, boy.

[Bob]

Can you imagine Tom walking up to someone and that other person is naked and Tom's trying to talk to him.

[Jeff Oskay]

It was like a grandfather clock. This thing had so much momentum on the pendulum. It was amazing.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, what is that called on a grandfather clock?

[Christy Lee]

A pendulum?

[Tom Griswold]

Didn't we pendulum. Didn't we determine that it was a grandfather clock?

[Bob]

Has different from a grandmother clock?

[Christy Lee]

Grandmother clock's smaller.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

The joke was the grandmother clock doesn't have a dong.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Isn't that thing called the dong?

[Christy Lee]

No, no, no, no.

[Tom Griswold]

The donger.

[Chick McGee]

No, no, Tom, it's the pendulum.

[Tom Griswold]

I thought the pendulum was the thing in the. That went back and forth that.

[Chick McGee]

Hence, that's what the grandfather grandfather clock does.

[Christy Lee]

That's what we're talking.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, okay, I see. Not the thing inside the bell.

[Jeff Oskay]

No, that's the clapper.

[Tom Griswold]

That. Oh, that's the clapper, not the dong, but that's okay.

[Chick McGee]

I don't think a grandfather clock necessarily has a clapper.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Bob]

The donger was in Sixteen Candles.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah.

[Bob]

The donger wants. Wants food.

[Tom Griswold]

Is this establishment still there?

[Jeff Oskay]

No, it is. It is not. But it honestly just take a thousand random people off the street and that's who was there. There were some gorgeous people and there were some.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, good God.

[Jeff Oskay]

No wonder you guys swaying. You definitely don't want to have sex with each other.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, he said there were policemen there.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

You mean on duty?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

So it was legal?

[Jeff Oskay]

I think it was.

[Christy Lee]

How could it be legal?

[Jeff Oskay]

I don't know. But I mean, there were.

[Bob]

I don't think if money changes hands, I don't think there's any.

[Jeff Oskay]

And this was a long time ago. The average car in the parking lot was immers Mercedes or above.

[Bob]

There you go.

[Jeff Oskay]

It was well to do people just not physically well to do.

[Tom Griswold]

Like Eyes Wide Shut.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

And I mean, they had like a bar area that kind of like this in a circle, and they had a mattress in the middle. And you would sit there and drink your beer and watch people fornicate in front of you as.

[Tom Griswold]

There you go.

[Jeff Oskay]

They had machines. They had a dungeon.

[Tom Griswold]

Who ordered. Who ordered the ahi? Oh, I'm sorry, it's a fish.

[Jeff Oskay]

No, there were seriously people eating a cupcake while you're eating a cupcake, while you're watching some of the most vulgar stuff happen just inches away.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, did you. Did you just exit?

[Jeff Oskay]

I mean, we stayed for a couple hours and just went room to room and kind of watched what was taking place in each room on each floor.

[Tom Griswold]

Does someone explain the rules to you?

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, yeah. They have someone take you around and show you if you are into this. You may not want to go in here if this is what you're. They have probably 80 bedrooms in there. And if you leave the door open, then people are welcome to join you. If you leave it cracked, they're welcome to watch but not join. They had some bedrooms that had a window in between the two. So if couples wanted to do their thing on each side without any chance of touching each other, but you could watch each other.

[Chick McGee]

Wow.

[Jeff Oskay]

It was unbelievable. I wasn't right for weeks.

[Bob]

It sounds incredibly organized and well done.

[Jeff Oskay]

I mean, they had DJs on each floor. Hey, you know, they were playing a lot of something. Control. I had never heard that song before. Yeah, I had no idea.

[Chick McGee]

I like to think that at one point they just started playing the electric slide and everybody stopped what they were doing.

[Jeff Oskay]

I'm not even. You aren't wrong.

[Chick McGee]

No.

[Jeff Oskay]

There were line dancing half naked. Like fully naked. I mean, the dance floors were packed.

[Bob]

It sounds like a party Cupid shuffle. They all stop.

[Tom Griswold]

Was this like a Friday or Saturday night? Was this place only open on the weekends?

[Jeff Oskay]

I believe so. And one. One night a month was. You could be single and go, oh, but like the single for a couple of a hundred for a single man. It was like 500. And for a single woman, it was free.

[Tom Griswold]

That makes sense.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Jeff Oskay]

Luckily I wasn't there on single guy night. I heard that was a real.

[Tom Griswold]

Do they take Groupon or. No.

[Jeff Oskay]

But we did have to call a guy and get a secret password and give the password at the door.

[Tom Griswold]

And you remember what the password was?

[Jeff Oskay]

I have no idea. It was a color of some sort. I think it was blue or red or something.

[Bob]

Have to be pink, I would think.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Do they have like a two for Tuesday special? Like radio stations.

[Jeff Oskay]

But they have like a metal detector. You went through going in and you researched and. But you could bring it. People had their bags of toys that they would get out and they had like sanitizing stations.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, my goodness.

[Chick McGee]

I mean, they were prepared.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, yeah. They had a machine that some lady was strapped up in. Her husband was. There was a line and the husband would direct the next fellow to step.

[Chick McGee]

Up and control the machine.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, yeah. And she was all about it.

[Christy Lee]

I mean, what kind of a machine? I'm naive.

[Chick McGee]

I. I've only seen. It's not my thing. But if you look up machine porn, it's. Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

It's really okay if. If you're a young person, it's very disturbing.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I. I think I can. I'll be fine not knowing.

[Jeff Oskay]

But in case you're wondering, nothing happened. Like, I couldn't have done anything had I wanted to. I was nervous. He was hiding like a turtle. There was no. It wasn't sexy to me.

[Christy Lee]

It's not erotic.

[Bob]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

Jeff. Oscar discussing his trip to the so called swingers club. Yeah, I imagine it's relocated. It's probably in a different facility at.

[Jeff Oskay]

This point, I would assume, but it was in a major building downtown. When I worked at the brokerage firm, I could see it from my window.

[Christy Lee]

What?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Was it a regular office during the week?

[Jeff Oskay]

No, but it looked like a regular office from the outside.

[Chick McGee]

Really wild. I mean, there must have been some money behind that.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

And I know they were charging billions, but. Yeah. Yeah. That's the thing. Like, it had private investors.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah. They had three different group hot tubs. They had three saunas. It had big group showers. Like I said 80 bedrooms. They had, I think 10 orgy rooms. A dungeon. There was some money.

[Tom Griswold]

Did they validate parking?

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, I just have remembered this.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh.

[Jeff Oskay]

When I worked at the brokerage firm, it did close because they had an auction and I saw a bunch of dudes with pickup trucks taking mattresses out, like stacked 10 high and they were strapping them down and taking them away. And I was like, oh, I wonder what motel those are going to now. I totally forgot about that.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, they auctioned.

[Chick McGee]

They were donated to a nice summer camp.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, thank you, Jeff. Coming up, we have some sporting news. We have your letters. We have some exciting things in the world of news coming to us from the Silac insurance news desk. One of our staff members, Mike Mark, is heading to Maine. Yeah, great State of Maine. He'll be there for the next week. And in his honor, there's a great white shark that's been spotted off the coast of Maine that's in the news.

[Bob]

So your fear is so present and so real for sharks, you're not even going to a state where a shark was spotted. Right. Even in land.

[Tom Griswold]

And then we have a great story for Josh involving fishing in a lake in Pennsylvania.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

And a surprise and a letter inviting Josh to go out to, I believe it's Wyoming to do a little bit of fishing in some beautiful country.

[Chick McGee]

How about that?

[Tom Griswold]

Right now, this portion of the Bob and Tom shop, the Bob and Tom show, excuse me, is sponsored by Better Help. Better Help is all about accessing talk therapy. If you've been thinking about it, BetterHelp kind of clears one of the big hurdles, which is driving across town, getting into someone's office, not being sure that's going to be the person for you. BetterHelp is therapy done online. So perhaps you want to work on some positive coping skills or break through the noise, maybe having a rough time in your personal life in some level or at the office. BetterHelp has some 30,000 therapists working, and they are, in fact, the world's largest online therapy platform, serving some 5 million people. And by the way, an average rating of 4.9 out of 5. That's. Excuse me, 4.9 out of 5. For their live sessions based on almost 2 million client reviews, it's pretty impressive. So see what I'm talking about. Visit betterhelp.com btshow BetterHelp is all about doing the therapy online, so it's a lot more convenient. You can do it with your smartphone or your laptop, wherever you happen to be when you want to do it, get all the details. Once again, betterhelp.com BTShow and Bob and Tom listeners get 10% off their first month. That's Better Help. H E L P betterhelp.com BTShow Also coming up, a recall of of soap. The soap may kill you.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, gosh.

[Tom Griswold]

We'll get to that. And anybody heard of hole talks. No.

[Chick McGee]

Is it Botox for a hole?

[Tom Griswold]

Yep. Oh, no. All right, well, guess which one. Coming up from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios, this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Ace Cosby]

Add to or continue the conversation. Check out the Bob and Tom show on Facebook. Get the [e-mail] this is the Bob and Tom Show. Jim Rome takes on sports.

[Tom Griswold]

Why? Because you're not playing me with rapid fire takes. Y' all went from the super bowl straight to the toilet bowl. He's not over the NFL. The NFL is over him. Scorching debates, all the good, all the bad, all the ups, all the downs.

[Bob]

He's the spitfire of sports.

[Ace Cosby]

Smack.

[Tom Griswold]

Sorry for what I said because it was appropriate when I said it, but I can't say it anymore. Dude, you are here killing the game.

[Bob]

The Jim Rome show podcast.

[Tom Griswold]

Follow and listen on your favorite platform.

[Bob]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. Christy Lee at the Silac Insurance news desk. Hi, there's Jeff Osuke.

[Jeff Oskay]

Hey, buddy.

[Bob]

There's Josh Arnold.

[Chick McGee]

Hi there.

[Bob]

Ace Cosby. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. I'm Chick. Hello, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello, everybody.

[Bob]

Hello, everybody.

[Tom Griswold]

Do you have any letters over there?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yes. I'll just ask you. You want me to read it or not?

[Bob]

I do. Go ahead.

[Chick McGee]

You guys were talking about squirrel sex and we were.

[Jeff Oskay]

We were.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, we had. We had a thing about the squirrel cooking competition coming right then that had.

[Chick McGee]

Nothing to do with the squirrel sex. We. Right, right. But I like that you try to jam stories in the.

[Tom Griswold]

What do I understand when we talk. When were we talking about squirrels?

[Jeff Oskay]

Two days ago.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, I mentioned that. I. I mean, I almost saw some squirrel sex on my deck, remember? But he. Could the girl lift her tail. Let me try to regret. Gain the momentum here. The you girl. You guys were talking about squirrel sex. But did you know that pigeons die when they have sex?

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Jeff Oskay]

What?

[Chick McGee]

At least the one I banged did, said Austin.

[Tom Griswold]

We were being set up.

[Chick McGee]

We sure were.

[Tom Griswold]

I. I'm so sorry.

[Bob]

We're just part of life.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, I asked if you guys want me to read it. Putting the blame.

[Bob]

I should have known.

[Chick McGee]

Well, but we were talking about the squirrel cook off there. Tommy, listen to this. James from South Georgia writes in. A coworker of mine was having a bit of a squirrel issue. He decided to shoot them with a.22.

[Bob]

All right.

[Chick McGee]

He proceeded to bring some for lunch.

[Bob]

Oh, for lunch. Okay.

[Chick McGee]

This is what he would do. He skinned the squirrel, split it down the middle, filled the cavity with, quote, taters. And onions and topped it with a whole Italian sausage laid right there in the middle. The squirrel now sort of acts as a hot dog bun.

[Bob]

Right.

[Chick McGee]

And then he would just grill the whole. Craziest lunch I've ever seen.

[Bob]

So did he do all this in the break room or.

[Chick McGee]

Well, that's the bone.

[Tom Griswold]

It.

[Chick McGee]

It doesn't sound like he did. He skinned it and then just split it down them. So he almost spatchcocked it, you know.

[Tom Griswold]

To get rid of the guts, man.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. If he had to. If he filled the cavity with taters and onions. Maybe he did empty the cavity.

[Bob]

It'd be like, you know, skin and preparing a chicken, you know, that has bones in it.

[Chick McGee]

He said another old guy I worked with was seen walking around picking his teeth with a chicken foot. What's happening in South Georgia?

[Christy Lee]

I was going to say.

[Tom Griswold]

Where does he work now? The. This is from the Arkansas Game and Fish Commission. The world champion squirrel cook off is coming this September. Still time to enter, it says, according to Joe Wilson, who organizes the event, Squirrels about as organic and free range as it gets.

[Chick McGee]

Well, that could be a winner. This sausage squirrel.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Bob]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

They are also, by the way, doing the world squirrel shoot off at the marksmanship center. I don't know if this involves propelling squirrels with some kind of catapult or.

[Christy Lee]

If this is, oh, like skeet shooting.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know. Well, speaking of the great outdoors, I.

[Jeff Oskay]

Got a flying one.

[Tom Griswold]

We got this one. With regard to cowboy boots, apparently very hard to break in.

[Bob]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Rusty from Wyoming says, put them in the tub overnight. And he puts in Perenn, a tub full of water. Oh, tub won't do it. Thank you. Thank you for clearing the clarification.

[Bob]

That's that folksy wisdom that I don't care for.

[Tom Griswold]

We come off as being stupid, but.

[Chick McGee]

I really want to do that.

[Christy Lee]

No, I wouldn't think there were people who would claim.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah. If you really want to break in a baseball glove, you got to soak it in water for a little bit. Never do that.

[Bob]

And then. Yeah, and then you want to get your jeans to fit perfectly. You get in the tub with them on, and they shrink to your body.

[Chick McGee]

But leather, I don't think you want any.

[Bob]

No.

[Christy Lee]

Wouldn't it ruin the leather?

[Tom Griswold]

Right. Rusty goes on. Then you put them on wet and wear them around for a while. And he goes, they're going to be the most comfortable pair of boots you'll ever own.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Bob]

And other than the fungus on your.

[Chick McGee]

Feet so they fall apart in six months.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know. Yeah, he goes. By the way, I guide fly fishing trips on the North Platte river in Wyoming. Josh, Jeff, you want to take a trip? It's on me.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, that's very nice. I've never flown fish. I don't know. The past tense of life.

[Christy Lee]

Ish.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Dear Bob and Tom show.

[Bob]

I have flied fish. Yeah. That's interesting.

[Tom Griswold]

You guys were talking about urinal anxiety.

[Bob]

Yes, I was. I have it every now and then.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. I primarily get it at sporting events. Sure. And there's a huge crowd behind you.

[Bob]

So that doesn't happen to you at the opera, the theater, when there's a gang, a group of.

[Tom Griswold]

I haven't been to an opera for quite a long time. I have been to the theater.

[Bob]

Of course you have.

[Tom Griswold]

He goes. When you go to a Fenway or Oakland Coliseum with the trough style urinals, it's the worst.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Get between two old dudes.

[Bob]

It'll give you stage between two old dudes. What do you got over there, punk?

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you, Dom. Listening in Oakland, California, we certainly appreciate your being here.

[Christy Lee]

Was that the trough?

[Chick McGee]

I mean, it kind of. Hey, hey. We want them in and out.

[Bob]

Yeah, it makes sense, but guys do not care, man.

[Chick McGee]

Boy.

[Tom Griswold]

And there's a legendary video from a.

[Christy Lee]

Cut from Wrigley Field, right, Of a.

[Tom Griswold]

Guy essentially slip and sliding through a huge trough.

[Bob]

The dangers of old style beer.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I've always wondered that. The guy then get up because, I mean, they bought. They, they. How do I word this? They block the drain off. So it's got, you know, quite a bit of urine in it. And then the guy dives in and slides down. Did he go back to his seat?

[Bob]

If you've ever been in that urinal, you really don't have to block the drain. I mean, there's enough urine laying in there. You hit that thing anytime, you're gonna get covered.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, well, from what I can tell, every time I've gone to Chicago, that guy immediately got on the L.

[Tom Griswold]

Let.

[Jeff Oskay]

Me ask you this, gentleman, do you prefer at the urinal when they have the newspaper hanging above or the article?

[Chick McGee]

I like something to read.

[Bob]

Prefers strong. I don't mind it.

[Jeff Oskay]

I feel like it gives everyone a focal point in front of them. The only thing I hate is when you read the article continued on page seven, and you're like, is that to the right or the left? Do I have to know?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, you don't want to stick your head. Excuse me, sir. I'm not looking at your penis.

[Jeff Oskay]

I'm trying to Finish this article.

[Christy Lee]

Do they sell ads in there like they do in the ladies?

[Tom Griswold]

Some places do, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Chick McGee]

Truck stops will advertise their own sales.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

I always like that.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, CB antennas are on sale.

[Bob]

Yeah, A lot of times. They'll also have French ticklers dispensing machine.

[Jeff Oskay]

For those who's buying that?

[Bob]

And cologne. You push a button, you get a little cologne out of. No, like 50 cents.

[Tom Griswold]

That business has to really fall in all rubbers.

[Bob]

I have rubbers. Rubbers for sale from a machine. You've seen the rubbers?

[Tom Griswold]

Wouldn't be great if you're a mega millionaire and you had a bathroom at your house and you put all that really junky truck stop stuff in there.

[Bob]

Honey, we got to reorder French sticklers.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm not sure, but some of our guests keep. Keep buying them.

[Christy Lee]

All we get are pads and plugs. Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

I'm sorry.

[Bob]

Pads and plugs.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, that sounds like a morning show.

[Jeff Oskay]

They're taking the place of the view.

[Tom Griswold]

Unplug. She's pads. How's it going?

[Christy Lee]

We were talking about menstrual things earlier in the week.

[Chick McGee]

We were just trying to teach you about them.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

There was a news story that seemed lost.

[Christy Lee]

A lot of reusable cups and such are out there now.

[Tom Griswold]

They gave no numbers, but they claim.

[Christy Lee]

That about 11 to 18% is what I could find.

[Tom Griswold]

More women are using the non disposable menstrual equipment.

[Christy Lee]

Right. And then there's a panty now that you can buy various. That soak up so you don't have to wear anything. It just kind of. This is from my daughter plays baseball, not softball. She wears sliding shorts under her baseball pants. The shorts she wears are specifically made for baseball playing softball playing girls.

[Bob]

Oh, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

So if they start during a game, it'll absorb.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Good leakage.

[Chick McGee]

That's good. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

That's great. Thanks, Scott.

[Tom Griswold]

And this article was about the. What is it? The cup.

[Christy Lee]

Silicon cup.

[Jeff Oskay]

The Diva Cup.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Very good.

[Bob]

Oh, yeah, it is. That's the Diva cup, man.

[Christy Lee]

That's the brand.

[Chick McGee]

I thought it hung underneath, too. I did not know. I'm with Tom. I didn't know it was inserted.

[Christy Lee]

Really?

[Bob]

No kidding.

[Chick McGee]

I thought it flowed out into a. Into it.

[Jeff Oskay]

You thought it was one of those, like, cups you put the ketchup in.

[Christy Lee]

Kind of like strap it around.

[Tom Griswold]

It's like essentially a ramekin.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

The paper ramica.

[Christy Lee]

Strap it around your waist.

[Chick McGee]

How it worked.

[Bob]

Did you ever run into a feeble. A diaphragm a lady using a diaphragm while you were. You know what I mean?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, sure.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

The weirdest thing ever was something. I don't. I don't know if they're even legal anymore. There was something called the NCare Oval.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, the end care of. I thought you were going to bring up the sponge.

[Tom Griswold]

It was a spermicide and.

[Bob]

Yeah, it would foam up.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, it was. Yeah. You. The lady would insert it and I'm not it.

[Christy Lee]

Did it burn?

[Tom Griswold]

Did you ever accidentally put dishwashing liquid in your dishwasher? You know, the kind you're supposed to use in the sink?

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you put it in your regular dishwasher and it just foams up and starts spewing out like a three. Yes.

[Bob]

Can you take the. What used to be called. I don't know if they're still out there, the sponge. Can you.

[Tom Griswold]

I think those are available. Didn't they have toxic shock issues or something?

[Bob]

But can't you wash dishes with those or something? I mean.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, sure.

[Chick McGee]

I don't know how effective they are as sponges.

[Tom Griswold]

After a little bit of action. I took that. Hey, by the way, I popped that thing on, went and did the dishes for you, honey. Now, thanks. I'll see you next time. Your money's on the table. Chocolate.

[Bob]

Talk about killing two birds, huh?

[Chick McGee]

I had a girlfriend who used that end care oval that would foam up like that.

[Bob]

Did you find you find it stung a little bit every now and then? Yeah, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

We called her Cujo.

[Tom Griswold]

And it was very warm, by the way.

[Christy Lee]

Was it?

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, it was really weird.

[Bob]

Did you hear how Josh let the show come to him?

[Tom Griswold]

Did you hear that?

[Jeff Oskay]

That was beautiful.

[Tom Griswold]

I was observing that.

[Bob]

It was beautiful.

[Tom Griswold]

Coming up. That's the second time this break. He nailed me. I thought he was. Coming up. We have exciting things in the world of fishing for Josh.

[Bob]

Oh, and we got a letter about fish.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, good. It's all Next. From the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Ace Cosby]

Just gotta get a hold of us. Call, text or email. Get all the contact information you [e-mail] this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Bob]

You just can't help yourself. Welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. We're the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Thank O'Reilly Auto Parts for all your car care needs. Get the parts and service you need fast from the professional parts people at O'Reilly Auto Parts. That's Josh on harmonica.

[Chick McGee]

Yes. Thank you.

[Bob]

Oh, there's Christy Lee.

[Christy Lee]

Hello.

[Bob]

There's Jeff Oskay.

[Jeff Oskay]

Hey, buddy.

[Bob]

And that is Josh Arnold. Ace Cosby's. Here I am Chick McGee. And here is Tom Griswold. Hello.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much for joining us.

[Bob]

We have more letters.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, okay. You go over. What do you got over there?

[Bob]

Dear Bob and Tom, show. Tom, this is for you. How many goldfish have you gotten at the state fair?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

We have not done the goldfish yet. What? I still have my one. I've got. I've had the one for two years now. Know. I mean, it started with whatever it was he does and I'm forgetting what it is. I really should know this.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, he should. You don't talk to him every day.

[Tom Griswold]

I see him all the time. He's right there in the dog room.

[Bob]

I see him all the time in the dog room.

[Tom Griswold]

He's right there by the dog biscuits. Got a little jar. But I mean, I've got the whole deal. I've got a giant filter on it. This is probably the purest water.

[Bob]

Can you hear that? Can you hear the dogs talking? I don't know what the hell is. Is all about. Evidently. This is the pet room.

[Tom Griswold]

The dogs. The laundry room is also. I call it the dog room. It's a washer dryer. So the dogs hang out a lot.

[Chick McGee]

Dogs ever look at the fish?

[Tom Griswold]

I suppose they could see it. They'd have to get up on the shelf.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, okay.

[Tom Griswold]

They don't seem to be interested in the fish. Yeah, but I think. I think I won nine of them. Or I. My daughter did, but this one is thriving.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

I've decided when I win the new fish, I'm not going to put him in that tank.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, good call.

[Tom Griswold]

So I've got another tank I'm going to put down in my office in the basement.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, cool.

[Bob]

You know that new tank, Same as the old tank.

[Chick McGee]

That's what they say.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I've got. That was the tank that had the frogs in it? No, it had the giant blue crab, whatever it was, that lived for about four months.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah. Either school's crawdad.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, the invasive species crawdad.

[Christy Lee]

They made you taken home.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I kept it alive for quite some time and then. Then I bought some feeder fish for it and it ate four of them and died. Oh, man. We'll see. But yeah, I'm looking forward to winning some. Winning some goldfish. Kind of an annual event for me at the fair.

[Jeff Oskay]

Is your daughter pretty good at it or does it run you about 75 bucks a gold?

[Tom Griswold]

Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. But yeah, you take like 40 turns. Finally.

[Christy Lee]

Can't you just go to the pet store and buy them for like four bucks?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, it's about the journey, Chrissy.

[Bob]

Oh, boy. And the dream squashers, of course. Huh? There you go.

[Tom Griswold]

Real nice, real nice. Folks run the place.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, good.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, it's fun.

[Tom Griswold]

You win your goldfish, you can come back and pick them up an hour later after you've gone on some of the rides. That's a blast.

[Chick McGee]

Let's see if you guys can figure out who this letter writer is addressing first. I've often heard both of the show's counterfeit intellectuals. Any guesses as to who's being addressed?

[Tom Griswold]

It's gotta be me. I hope, I hope, I hope.

[Bob]

You and Tom.

[Christy Lee]

That's exactly right.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Josh and Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

What do I call a faux literary.

[Chick McGee]

You accused me of faux literary posturing.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, that's what I do.

[Chick McGee]

Well, here we're. We're counterfeit intellectuals. Tom and Josh. You use the fake word verbiage, says Adam. Verbiage is not a word.

[Tom Griswold]

Verbiage.

[Bob]

Yes, there's an eye in there.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, it's one of those things. Verbiage, three syllables is the actual word you two moon calves are failing to use.

[Bob]

What the hell is that?

[Christy Lee]

What's a moon calf?

[Chick McGee]

You've never heard? You've never. No one's ever called you a moon?

[Jeff Oskay]

No, it's.

[Chick McGee]

It just means moron or verbiage.

[Tom Griswold]

Verbiage is the hillbilly pronunciation. Verbiage is the more I think if you're in Cambridge, that's a verbiage.

[Chick McGee]

Well, I think what Adam. And he says, he signs the letter with loving disdain.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I love this.

[Chick McGee]

Which is excellent.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, very good.

[Chick McGee]

Of course, it's verbiage. We do say verbiage because our brains are working so fast that that third syllable is.

[Christy Lee]

We leave letters out a lot.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, the benefits of a classical education.

[Bob]

Now we got another letter for Tom. Dear Bob and Tom Show. Hey, Tom, after your squirrel and buffalo stories this week, I thought I would send you Lake Tahoe bear story. It happened to my daughter's in laws. This past weekend, a bear gained access to the locked SUV via the rear window frame.

[Christy Lee]

Oh.

[Bob]

The bear entered and exited the vehicle. No food was found. And I believe we have a. There, there's the window frame from the.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Bob]

The bear had no. No trouble getting into a locked suv. They man tore the frame off the back. The back driver's side.

[Tom Griswold]

So has the bear just figured out that some of these odd looking vehicles are full of food? Is that. What's going on?

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Bob]

Yeah. Or they. They can smell it.

[Chick McGee]

At least find some goldfish in a car seat.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, and not the ones you win at the fair. The goldfish.

[Tom Griswold]

Right.

[Chick McGee]

Right.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Bob]

And this one's for Dear Bob and Tom Show. Hello, Josh. I don't know if you've seen this picture or not, but I keep seeing these on one of my websites. Happy to see Josh's modeling career is finally taking off. And this is for a power company. A man and a construction hat. There he is.

[Chick McGee]

Oy. There's. There's a similarity there.

[Bob]

That's. That looked like you and all three of your brothers. Right.

[Chick McGee]

The only. The only reason I know that's not me is because that man is working.

[Bob]

He looks like he. He got up, got dressed, and went to the work site.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, that guy's doing something.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

You don't own a hard hat?

[Chick McGee]

I don't own a hard hat.

[Bob]

I used to wear a hard hat.

[Chick McGee]

At the foundry, but I love hard hats.

[Bob]

I wore a hard hat and safety glasses.

[Christy Lee]

Did they give you your own hard hat or did you just have to.

[Bob]

No, you just picked one.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, okay.

[Bob]

The old timers had their own hard hat.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. That kind of looks like me.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

We have a lot of bear news lately, right? A lot of bears in the news.

[Bob]

Favorite bear.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, my gosh.

[Tom Griswold]

What? I think it would have to be. Well, the most recent talking bear, Paddington.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, you mean you don't let.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, you mean like a real type.

[Bob]

Of, like a black.

[Christy Lee]

Black.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I thought you meant like a character as well.

[Bob]

I mean, it begins and ends with Yogi. I don't think you can beat that. Him.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I think. I think Paddington is the most contemporary of all bears.

[Christy Lee]

The nicest bears, the black bears.

[Chick McGee]

I feel like if I were to encounter a bear in the woods, I'd rather be a black bear than anything else.

[Bob]

Our producer Hoffy just messaged me. His favorite black bear is Walter Payton. Isn't that nice?

[Chick McGee]

Very good. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Very, very good. Well, it's time for us to move on. And give me some sports teasers.

[Bob]

Moving on, Daddy. Let's see. We've got the UFC making a big deal for big money, and there's going to be a fight, evidently, at the 4th of July next year. Well, I'll. I'll tell you where when we come back. It's a unique site.

[Chick McGee]

There's a fight, I think, in this letter. Real quick.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Bob]

Okay.

[Chick McGee]

We were discussing pretzel buns.

[Bob]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

And the pros and cons of Them. You've nailed it. Says Jimmy. Jimmy the lad, he goes by. You hit it right on the head. The pretzel bar. I'm sorry. The pretzel bun is a subpar pretzel and a subpar bun. I've had this discussion with my wife. It looks and sounds like it should be amazing on paper. Reality, a sad letdown. And I agree.

[Christy Lee]

I do, too.

[Tom Griswold]

Here's a photograph that's been circulating on the Internet.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know if you've seen this. It is a.

[Bob]

You know, it looks worse than I remember.

[Tom Griswold]

This is everywhere in the Internet. It's a promotional pretzel from the Indianapolis Colts. Now, you know what?

[Bob]

You can go one of two ways with this. You can go, okay, we can't sell that. But can you imagine? Everybody's going to want one.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, everybody's talking about it.

[Bob]

Absolutely.

[Christy Lee]

It's.

[Tom Griswold]

It's in the shape of the. Of the horseshoe, of course.

[Bob]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

But it is a pretzel and I. The phrase turd, like just jumps into one's head. Yeah, yeah. But I'm sure it's delicious. I've had pretzels. It's got to be nice and salty.

[Jeff Oskay]

I want to buy a few and just leave them in the bowls around the stadium to see if anyone notices the difference.

[Bob]

Boy, this guy really didn't like his pretzel.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Although that would be very healthy pretzel. Yeah. If you're doing that, that is. Yeah. That is quite a piece of work, sir.

[Bob]

Isn't that the ideal turd? If you will. They say shape.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, that is. That is gestated for quite some time. Established. Established. A nice home.

[Bob]

You're supposed to. It's supposed to sink. It's a float. You have too much fat in your diet.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. That one may be a ghost turd. That one may hit. Yeah. Because it's got so much momentum in any event. So sorry.

[Bob]

I'm sure there's a ghost turd because, you know, you did something, you got up and it's gone.

[Chick McGee]

Always wild when that happens.

[Bob]

Yeah. Nuts, right?

[Jeff Oskay]

I didn't know there was a term for it.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I think Stephen King wrote a book about it. Chick McGee's right over there. I can see him.

[Bob]

And let me tell you about Raycon's fan favorite, their everyday earbuds classic. Well, they're back. They went away because Raycon added active noise cancellation. The return of everybody's favorite everyday earbuds. The perfect way to tune out all the noise of your co workers. Possibly. And the Latest version, active noise cancellation of Everyday Earbuds Classic. And of course, they still have 8 hours of playtime, 32 hour battery. Raycons never leave your ears. Audio quality that rivals all the big audio brands you know and love at half the price. And Icon returns Raycon's Everyday Earbuds Classic with free shipping on every pair of Raycon Earbuds. This message sponsored by Raycon. And now go to buyraycon.com tom to get 20% off the fan favorite Everyday Earbuds Classic. Right now, Raycon offering 20% off their Everyday Earbuds Classic. That's buyraycon.com Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much, chick. Coming up, we have a question for Christy Lee.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

As you know, I love a good hack premise.

[Bob]

Doggy or missionary?

[Tom Griswold]

Just one of those, you know, comedian gets up there and they, and they, hey, what's the difference between New York and la? Whatever. I, I enjoy those. See if you can get something, get something fresh out of that.

[Bob]

But you're laughing.

[Chick McGee]

I like it too. Hey, I'm half Italian and I'm half German. So yeah, I like, I'm a sucker.

[Tom Griswold]

I love those.

[Chick McGee]

Right, right.

[Bob]

Because they take over myself and force me to eat pasta.

[Tom Griswold]

And the best ones insult both, both of their ethnicities. Those are the. And if they can work bowling in, I'm really happy. This one is a question for Christy and it's kind of a hack premise, but I think there's something to it and it involves graffiti and how it may differ between a men's room and a ladies room. And I think there's something to this. And we'll find out what that is when we return to the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios, where this remains the Bob and Tom Show.

[Bob]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. Christy Lee at the SILAC Insurance news desk.

[Christy Lee]

Hi, Jake.

[Bob]

Hey, there's Jeff Oskay.

[Jeff Oskay]

That's right.

[Bob]

That's right. There's Josh Arnold. Hello. How you doing, buddy? There's a Chase Cosby. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios.

[Tom Griswold]

Just saw a school bus go by Hong Kong.

[Chick McGee]

Too soon, man.

[Bob]

Yeah. Come on.

[Tom Griswold]

Should be like wearing white. Wait till Labor Day.

[Chick McGee]

You're exactly right.

[Tom Griswold]

Maybe that's not the best analysis, but.

[Chick McGee]

No, you're right. They're really. I. You'll never convince me there was anything wrong with day after Labor Day. Yeah, Memorial Day.

[Christy Lee]

I agree.

[Jeff Oskay]

It's move in day for college for my son tonight.

[Christy Lee]

How exciting.

[Jeff Oskay]

When we get done here, we're heading off to college.

[Bob]

All right.

[Christy Lee]

Are you going to decorate the room to get some?

[Jeff Oskay]

I, I, he is. I think he's going to be really shocked when he finds out I'm not leaving. We're roomies now.

[Chick McGee]

It's like, back to school. Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

I've never went to college, so, like, I'm living vicariously.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

When I went, I can remember someone, the first, the first guy that gets there, sets up huge speakers in his windows and starts playing the Grateful Dead live album.

[Jeff Oskay]

That's cool.

[Tom Griswold]

Now everyone's sitting in their room staring at a computer with earbuds in.

[Chick McGee]

Yep.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, you're right.

[Tom Griswold]

It's a different world.

[Christy Lee]

I saw my first bong.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, really?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, because the guy that was playing Ted Nugent used to he. Oh, it was awful. And he had the biggest bong that I've ever seen in my entire life.

[Tom Griswold]

Wait a minute, wait a second. I'm a Ted Nugent fan.

[Christy Lee]

I love Ted Nugent, but not blasting all day long.

[Tom Griswold]

Only way to play it, Ted. Journey to the center of the Mind. One of the great guitar solos of all time. Keep it to yourself, Ted Amboy Dukes. Okay, here's the question. Christie Lee.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

This is a letter. Dear Bob and Tom show. A few weeks ago, I was at a sports bar. I went to the restroom and I thought, wow, this is interesting. The graffiti is all upbeat. It said things like, soon you will bloom. Love yourself and they will love you. I got back to the table and I said, it's weird that that restroom has no urinals. And then it was pointed out to me that I'd inadvertently gone into the ladies room in a crowded sports bar. Oh, but it's begs the question, is the graffiti in ladies room typically very positive? Whereas opposed to, of course, in the men's room, things like, hey, the joke is in your hand, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.

[Christy Lee]

No, not necessarily.

[Tom Griswold]

Is there a lot of positivity in no restroom?

[Christy Lee]

A lot of Stacey's a. Oh, I'm sorry. Stacy's a whore.

[Tom Griswold]

I heard that.

[Christy Lee]

I heard about that. Yeah. I mean, yeah.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

That's kind of universal that Stacy was really.

[Bob]

I thought you said a lot of.

[Christy Lee]

It is like, didn't you bang Stacy one time?

[Chick McGee]

Who didn't?

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

I mean, hence the graffiti.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

A lot of it is like, Christy loves Andy and there'll be a heart around it. Or I was here on 7. 1778.

[Bob]

That's a big one. I've seen that in guys restrooms. The date and I was here.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Christy Lee]

I've never seen a lot of positive. Hey, baby, you look great.

[Chick McGee]

No, I'm gonna guess an employee did that or the management or something, I would say, because I think that's kind of a cool thing. But. But I mean, you look at any. Look at any post that a woman puts up on social media and then see what the other women have commented. You'll know. Bathroom. Female bathroom. Graffiti is not positive.

[Christy Lee]

No, there's a dive bar near here that has the old wooden. You know, still the wooden.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, that's cool.

[Christy Lee]

And it's carved in like. Those are that serious business. If you're carving it into the wall, why isn't that.

[Bob]

Some of those. Why don't some industrious art get all those together and put them in an art museum?

[Christy Lee]

That would be a cool.

[Chick McGee]

There is kind of something to there. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that would be cool.

[Tom Griswold]

I wonder if graffiti has. If there's less of it because of Wordle and because of smartphones.

[Christy Lee]

Wordle.

[Chick McGee]

In a way, I think so. Because how many people do, you know have a pen in their pocket the whole. You know, all the time.

[Tom Griswold]

But I mean, you don't sit down and start reading the paper. No, not in. By the paper. I mean, you know, public restroom.

[Christy Lee]

On your phone, you mean?

[Bob]

Oh, on your phone. Yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I can no longer go without a phone in my hand.

[Bob]

You're right.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, really?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

I've done the opposite. I've trained myself not to look at the phone anymore.

[Christy Lee]

I don't even.

[Tom Griswold]

What do you do?

[Chick McGee]

Go and get out.

[Tom Griswold]

What do you think about your business?

[Chick McGee]

I don't know what I think about.

[Bob]

It does keep your mind busy.

[Chick McGee]

But the next time it happens, I will kind of. I'll try to be conscious of what I am thinking about and I'll let you know.

[Christy Lee]

Can you see outside your window when you're on the toilet?

[Chick McGee]

Yes. In my. At my house, I can. If I want, I can open up my blinds and I can look right out at the street.

[Christy Lee]

Because I can look out.

[Tom Griswold]

That means they can look. They can look right in.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. I think I was caught by my mailman once.

[Bob]

Hey, that's on your mailman.

[Chick McGee]

And I asked my neighbors, I go, hey, when you. Because they have the same layout. And I said, hey, when you're upstairs in the mat in the primary bathroom and you use. You open up your windows while you're sitting on the toilet, can you. Do you think that people can see in? And the neighbor looks at me and goes, I don't open the blinds when I'm doing that.

[Christy Lee]

Do your Dogs go to the bathroom with you?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, oh, oh, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

My dogs.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, always.

[Bob]

Well, that's the thing. We found out that one morning. That's a thing for dogs. They keep an eye on each other when they're doing that. They're pack animals.

[Tom Griswold]

My dog walks in there, he looks at me and he goes, hey, I drink out of that. What the hell are you doing? I don't crap in your sink. Cut it out. I just. I just found out my little guy can now do it.

[Christy Lee]

Do what?

[Tom Griswold]

My little dog can drink out of the toilet. I didn't think he was big enough to do that. And he waltzed up to me with his face all wet. They go, what? What? What happened to your face? Yeah. And I realized a little bit later.

[Christy Lee]

We keep all the lids shut.

[Bob]

You got to keep the lid.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I keep the lid shut.

[Bob]

Oh, well, what about the blue toilet bowl cleaner in the Tidy Bowl?

[Tom Griswold]

I don't have that.

[Christy Lee]

I don't either. Do you do that?

[Bob]

No, I don't.

[Tom Griswold]

I love that stuff.

[Chick McGee]

You live with girls. Do. Do women lower the lid is because the seat is down when they use the toilet. But will they lower the lid?

[Tom Griswold]

No. And that's the problem.

[Chick McGee]

Gotcha.

[Tom Griswold]

And the dogs have figured out they can go up, they can go upstairs and get to the girls.

[Christy Lee]

I always lower the lid before I flush. Always.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but. Oh, I've got little girls. Flushing is an option.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Little kids, man, they hurry to get back to playing.

[Bob]

Why is it our responsibility to put the lid down after we've urinated instead of the woman's responsibility, put it up so we can urinate easily.

[Christy Lee]

Well, there's nothing worse than falling in in the middle of the night.

[Tom Griswold]

We've all done that, Christy.

[Bob]

I bet Christy goes up to her neck in a toilet.

[Christy Lee]

Wake you up.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, it's time now to switch gears and check in with the.

[Bob]

We've got a couple letters.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, well, go ahead.

[Bob]

Dear Bob and Tom show. Similar to Tommy Jonigan's story, the one about he was driving with his truck driver dad. And his dad told Tommy that the giant wind farms out in California were facing a specific direction to keep California snugged up against the west coast of the United States.

[Tom Griswold]

It was going to float away, but.

[Bob]

It was going to float away.

[Tom Griswold]

That was a big secret that no one.

[Bob]

My dad, also a truck driver, told my sister and I that the arch in St. Louis was going to be the full McDonald's logo. But they ran out of money and had to stop construction.

[Tom Griswold]

That's great.

[Bob]

My dad Never told us that he was joking. And my sister told her class at school. Did you hear about the art? How about that?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah. See you got to be careful. And we got a letter the other day regarding. What was it? Mountain cows.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Bob]

Two legs are shorter than.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. She joking, jokingly, jokingly told her stepfather that. Oh yeah, those. See those cows on the mountain there? Yeah, the, the legs on one side are longer so they don't fall down the mountain. And then he was sincerely passing that on to people thinking it was. Was true. I got a follow up letter from her, by the way, and her stepfather has since died, but she said that's her favorite story about him and.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, very nice.

[Tom Griswold]

She was glad that we got him got that story on the air.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, good.

[Tom Griswold]

You're very welcome. Now one more thing. I was listening to you and Greg Warren talking about pickles on Monday. Tom and Greg of course went off topic and started talking about how much they like iced tea and what iced tea snobs they are.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

My friend always when we get tea says to the waiter or waitress, is your iced tea brewed or out of the soda machine? If it's out of the soda machine, they don't get it.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I don't.

[Tom Griswold]

That's me saying I agree.

[Christy Lee]

I think a lot of people do that.

[Tom Griswold]

My snobbery has. Now I prefer an orange slice to a lemon slice. Oh, really?

[Christy Lee]

I noticed Jess brought you a bunch of oranges too.

[Tom Griswold]

Nice.

[Christy Lee]

Wasn't that nice?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

She brought you oranges for your tea.

[Tom Griswold]

I'll be having some tea shortly.

[Bob]

But right now, dear Bob and Tom show the best condiment for eg, eggs. It's not ketchup, Chick. It's chick fil A sauce.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, and people love that.

[Christy Lee]

They sure do.

[Bob]

I haven't tried that. I will have to.

[Christy Lee]

They sell it in the store now in bottles.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, I got, I just got one the other day.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, my kids love it.

[Bob]

No kidding.

[Tom Griswold]

Chick Fil a has got the drive through down. Whoever developed that for them I think should be put in charge of the department of motor Vehicles all across the country. Yeah, my favorite.

[Jeff Oskay]

I hadn't seen. I went to one the other day with, with and it was raining and they had like these boxes that they wear or like cellophane that to keep them dry.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

And they're like walking around like mailboxes. Yeah. Adorable.

[Bob]

See what's going on at Chick Fil a? That they're this on top of stuff there and why isn't all the. Aren't all the Restaurants like this, Tom, help me with. I know why they're very good.

[Chick McGee]

Because on Sundays, they're not working.

[Tom Griswold]

They're thinking.

[Chick McGee]

They're thinking it. Yes.

[Bob]

All right, that makes sense. Yes.

[Chick McGee]

They've got that extra time.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Leaving money on the table.

[Chick McGee]

If you ask me how many times, I guarantee millions.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, but you go to Chick Fil A and it's Sunday and you. Ah, man, I forgot I saw something.

[Jeff Oskay]

I think it was a meme the other day. I was like, I'm going to open a food truck that sells chicken, park it next to Chick Fil a on Sundays and call it Side Chick. I was like, what a great name that is.

[Tom Griswold]

That's very, very smart.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. That might actually work until you're arrested.

[Bob]

And Brian and Iowa continues a while back. You guys talking about guilty pleasure songs? I heard one this morning. Veruca Salt, the Volcano Girls.

[Chick McGee]

Are you. That's not. There's nothing guilty about that at all. That song rocks.

[Bob]

Sounds like he amped up. Bangles.

[Chick McGee]

They kind of are.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

I was front row for them. They are gorgeous.

[Chick McGee]

They are not especially. Louise. Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

This is Lou's gorgeous.

[Chick McGee]

It's two of them.

[Jeff Oskay]

Two of them. I. I like them both.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, I do too. But I had a crush on Louise big time.

[Bob]

Do you remember where the name Veru Assault comes from, Tom?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, it's a character in.

[Bob]

Nope. Willy Wonka. That's right.

[Chick McGee]

Seether was their big hit. And yeah. In fact, see there's mentioned in Volcano Girls.

[Christy Lee]

They are pretty girls.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, yeah, they're cool. I saw them at Pops.

[Christy Lee]

Pops.

[Chick McGee]

Yes, in East St. Louis. You guys are familiar with Pops?

[Bob]

Chuck Berry play there?

[Chick McGee]

No, he played Blueberry Hill. But. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but a guilty pleasure song has to be one that's sort of embarrassing. But you really like it.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, I don't think there's anything embarrassed about it.

[Bob]

Begins and ends for me with.

[Chick McGee]

Are they gonna be embarrassed about.

[Tom Griswold]

She gotta hit that piece. Thank you. Christy, play this for on your first date. It'll be your last.

[Chick McGee]

Well, I'm about to be thrown to a pit.

[Bob]

I. I'm guessing that this right here is Josh's guilty pleasure.

[Chick McGee]

No guilt at all. Zero guilt.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Bob]

This is Charles Boots Randolph.

[Chick McGee]

Somebody put the some of the most catastrophic scenes from Titanic to this song.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

I stumbled upon that yesterday.

[Bob]

Have you run across. Have you run across every movie on. I saw it on Instagram. Ev. They put Born to Run at the end of every movie. No, and it proved it just proves that Born to Run makes any Movie better. And the end of There Will Be Blood in the Bowling Alley. And he's laying on. Sir, you finished? Yeah, I'm done. Just wonderful. Yeah. Oh, how about this, Josh? You might like this one.

[Chick McGee]

I. Yeah, I enjoy this kind of thing.

[Tom Griswold]

Boy, this little of this goes a long way.

[Chick McGee]

It's infectious, isn't it?

[Bob]

Yeah. I want to make you laugh.

[Christy Lee]

Is this a Dr. Demento?

[Bob]

I think it is, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I see.

[Bob]

Well. Oh, here's just for giggles. Here's Lawrence Taylor. A law of enforcement can solicit you.

[Tom Griswold]

All day and you tell them no.

[Ace Cosby]

And then they the nerve to come.

[Bob]

Into my room at two o' clock in the morning and try to sell me drugs.

[Tom Griswold]

That's. I know this all we.

[Bob]

What else he's going to do than by it's two in the morning. Come on.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Guilty pleasure songs. Christy, you must have a. Don't you have a couple like David Cassidy or.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, gosh. Yeah. Those aren't guilty pleasures. Those are childhood.

[Bob]

I think I love you and What?

[Christy Lee]

Partridge Family.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I like that Call Me maybe song.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, I do too.

[Bob]

Really? Yeah. I think that was voted the whitest song in the history of recorded music.

[Christy Lee]

That explains Tom.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Ergo.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, that's catchy.

[Jeff Oskay]

And mine's that Delight song.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I love that. Groove is in the Heart.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, that's my guilty pleasure.

[Chick McGee]

There's nothing. Hey, you don't need to feel guilty for that.

[Jeff Oskay]

A little bit.

[Bob]

Is this the. Is this Call Me maybe.

[Tom Griswold]

Maybe.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, this is the original.

[Jeff Oskay]

This is the original.

[Bob]

This is how it starts.

[Tom Griswold]

This is the one. Wasn't the American Olympic swim team all singing this on the plane?

[Chick McGee]

This is a good pop song.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I was wrong.

[Tom Griswold]

See, that's very, very catchy.

[Bob]

Big strings.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Bob]

A good time. It's great.

[Chick McGee]

I also like her duet with Owl City, which is.

[Bob]

Oh, I love.

[Chick McGee]

One of the. The weaker things I've ever said in my life.

[Tom Griswold]

That's the whole thing. Yeah, it's. It's. These songs are great, but you just don't want to admit that you like them.

[Bob]

I feel as a man I have to look at you and say, thank you, Mary.

[Chick McGee]

Right?

[Bob]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

I think one of them. I don't know. I don't know. Party in the USA by Miles.

[Chick McGee]

I love it too.

[Christy Lee]

I do love that song.

[Chick McGee]

I think that's a really good dance.

[Christy Lee]

I moved my hips.

[Bob]

What's the one from the Gnomes movie? Justin Timberlake.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, Sunshine or something. Summer.

[Bob]

Oh, I forget.

[Chick McGee]

I. I will crank if tub thumping comes on by Chumba W. I love T I. I love the sentiment. I get knocked down, but I get up again.

[Tom Griswold]

Is that the one? That's for a while was in every movie ever.

[Chick McGee]

Probably.

[Bob]

I get back up again. You're never gonna get me down.

[Tom Griswold]

I want to find out what is. What song of that ilk is. Has been in more movies in the last 20 years.

[Chick McGee]

All Star was in like four.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

In one year, the Heavy has a.

[Bob]

Song called how youw Like Me now. That was in.

[Chick McGee]

That's an autonomous like 10 movies in.

[Bob]

A row or something.

[Christy Lee]

Which. Can't stop the feeling. The song.

[Bob]

Can't stop the feeling. That's it. Can't stop the feeling.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Very good. Coming up, we are going to finally dip our toes into the world of sports.

[Bob]

Yeah, I guess A lot of significant.

[Tom Griswold]

Sporting news this morning.

[Bob]

Just some quick advice. In the world of sports, if you are an athlete in college or pro and you're betting on games, don't first of all, make all your Venmo transactions private. You can do that. Just it's a setting. Yes. And secondly, if they are public, don't put for gambling in the subject heading in the memo. Just, just don't do it.

[Tom Griswold]

Or for gambling on my team.

[Bob]

Yeah. Just don't. Yeah, just don't do it. Just set it all on private.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, good to know. In the news, we have great white sharks. We have. Oh, something that's really going to get Josh angry.

[Chick McGee]

Good.

[Tom Griswold]

Plus, we have a cool fishing story. And anal Botox. Huh?

[Bob]

I thought you're gonna say anal nitrate again, which is not the words. Well, there's one word, right.

[Tom Griswold]

But it's amyl nitrate.

[Bob]

Amyl nitrate.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, from what I've been told, apparently.

[Bob]

Dr. Robert Emil invented it.

[Tom Griswold]

I see. Well.

[Bob]

Well, that sounded real.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

How about Dr. Robert Anal?

[Bob]

He invented. Yeah. Before that, we had to scoop it out ourselves. We should have a Dr. Robert anal day.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

There should be a government holiday.

[Tom Griswold]

God bless you, sir.

[Bob]

Remember the Dark Ages.

[Tom Griswold]

Someone had to do it. Of course. The creator of the famous anal scoop. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Ace Cosby]

Thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom show this morning. Even though we're not too much to look at, you can also watch the show on our YouTube channel.

[Bob]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts studios. Think O'Reilly Auto Parts. For all your car care needs. Get the parts and service you need fast from the professional parts people at O'Reilly Auto Parts. Christy Lee. Hey, Jeff Oskay.

[Tom Griswold]

Hi, man.

[Bob]

Josh Arnold.

[Christy Lee]

Chickster.

[Bob]

Ace Cosby.

[Tom Griswold]

Chick.

[Bob]

We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. I'm Chick. Hello, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

We were kind of asking on the air what song, what popular song has appeared in movies the most? They. The way they use popular songs and movies. Of course, the leading contender, according to this survey is. You can't touch this.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, really? I'd be hard pressed. I mean, I believe it, but I'd be hard pressed to name one song that you can't touch. This one movie that that song's in.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. And then the one you mentioned, All Star by Smash Mouth.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah. Hey there. You're an all star.

[Tom Griswold]

Has appeared in Mystery Men, Digimon, Inspector Gadget, Rat Race, Shrek, Inspector Gadget with.

[Bob]

Or Cash Grab by Matthew Broderick. Is that what that was?

[Tom Griswold]

Was that not a good movie?

[Bob]

I did not Inspector Gadget.

[Chick McGee]

It was. Sadly, it wasn't as good as it could have been. I don't think it was Broderick's fault, though. That was inspired casting.

[Bob]

Here's mine. Ready?

[Tom Griswold]

Now.

[Chick McGee]

Why would you ever feel guilty about liking this?

[Bob]

I like the. When the adult guitar comes in, two.

[Chick McGee]

Out of three they've got going. They're fine, they're young.

[Bob]

Here it comes, Here it comes.

[Chick McGee]

Now, granted, they're cannibals, but still, this.

[Christy Lee]

Is a great song.

[Bob]

2 out of 3.

[Tom Griswold]

This is an MTV era classic.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Song's awesome.

[Bob]

Yeah. She drives me crazy, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Kind of a Prince inspired, you think?

[Bob]

And who inspired Prince? I mean, other than every person that came out of Motown.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, the song At Last by Etta James has been in 49 movies and TV shows since 19.

[Bob]

Well, that's not a guilty pleasure.

[Chick McGee]

No, but that's a. I just wish.

[Bob]

Edda James could sing. I couldn't get it out.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, it is a time to dip our toes into a sports.

[Bob]

Yes, thank you, Tom. It is the Italian sports. Lots of socks, actually. College football. Oklahoma Sooners quarterback John Mattier denied betting on sports after viral screenshots emerged just this week of Mattier sending money on his Venmo account to someone in November of 2022 with the memo line sports betting. In a statement yesterday, Mattier claimed those were inside jokes.

[Chick McGee]

Right.

[Bob]

That's just between me and my buddies, man. Come on. Yeah. Be sure and set all your Venmo.

[Chick McGee]

Transactions to private, which to me, that should be the default setting, Right?

[Bob]

Yeah. Right.

[Chick McGee]

I didn't know that this was until my niece, who's 22 or 23 explained to me a couple months ago that Venmo is almost. Her and her boyfriend were telling me it's almost treated like a social media account where. And they say they are constantly making jokes about what they've actually sent the money for.

[Tom Griswold]

So what? So anybody can log on to it.

[Bob]

You can. You make an account, go on to Venmo. You can go scroll through all who's on there and what they paid for. And yes, if you don't set it.

[Chick McGee]

Now, you can't see how much they've paid. So it won't say Christie sent Oscar $100.

[Christy Lee]

Right.

[Chick McGee]

It'll just say Christie paid Oscar for blowing massage.

[Bob]

Yeah, yeah, massage. So you don't want to write blowing.

[Chick McGee]

Apparently, there are a ton of inside jokes with emojis.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah. Okay.

[Jeff Oskay]

Well, did you ever, like, back when I had roommates and, like, you would all write it. We would take turns, pain, and then everyone would write you a check and they would put, you know, in the memo, anal bleach, whatever. You would have to go cash it at the bank. Like that.

[Tom Griswold]

What'd that go for?

[Chick McGee]

That.

[Jeff Oskay]

240.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Oh, that's steep. Coming up. We have anal Botox in the news. It isn't.

[Bob]

Yeah, but that's. That's the classic appearance. Yeah, the. The balloon knot, right?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. I don't know. That's. It's a thing.

[Jeff Oskay]

What do you call it, Josh?

[Chick McGee]

What, my anus?

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, the. The area, not the balloon dirt button.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, no. I talk about how you can count the spokes.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Bob]

Yeah. You don't want to get rid of that.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. You want.

[Bob]

I don't. I don't. I think if I saw one that was all smooth, it'd throw me.

[Chick McGee]

It would, wouldn't it?

[Bob]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

It's a thing out there.

[Chick McGee]

My friend said he saw one that was.

[Bob]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

So he was dating this girl who was the, like, number one, not vaudeville, burlesque star in the St. Louis area. She would travel nationally. She was actually nationally renowned burlesque star, and she was constantly getting her anus bleached. And my buddy said that it looked like it was made out of pure silver. She said it was metallic silver.

[Bob]

No way.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. How did he get a look? See at that?

[Chick McGee]

Well, in the throes of passion sometimes.

[Bob]

Well, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Don't you give the lights.

[Jeff Oskay]

He was dating her.

[Tom Griswold]

They'd have a flashlight.

[Bob]

No, no, you don't need a flashlight.

[Christy Lee]

Wait, wait. You don't do it with the lights on.

[Bob]

Pants around ankles. Missionary. All right. You got a baby and yeah, I'll see you next year.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, do you want to hear about anal Botox? Since we're.

[Bob]

Would I.

[Christy Lee]

Some people are opting to get Botox shots in their anus to treat constipation. Really? And even enhance sex.

[Tom Griswold]

But not at the same time, I'm hoping.

[Bob]

Oh, there's. There's. I'm just guessing. Scat play, probably.

[Jeff Oskay]

Of course there is.

[Tom Griswold]

Just keep reading.

[Christy Lee]

Stopping before California anesthesiologist Dr. Bitta Farrell explained that the procedure dubbed. Dubbed Holtox, is an unusual off label treatment for constipation. Way off label that works by relaxing the sphincter muscle, which relieves spasms and restores proper function to the anus.

[Chick McGee]

What? If there's any truth to that, it.

[Christy Lee]

Can also help the healing of fissures and hemorrhoids caused by straining.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh.

[Christy Lee]

Dr. Farrell said some patients seek out whole talks for aesthetic rejuvenation in the area and also to enhance the bedroom experience.

[Bob]

I just like the way it looks.

[Christy Lee]

However, she strongly cautioned against undergoing bum Botox shots if you do not suffer from chronic constipation, as it can lead to. Boy, these are a lot of words I don't like saying. Fecal incontinence. Oh, oh.

[Chick McGee]

Just comes right out.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Aesthetic nurse practitioner, Mr. Chris Bustamante. Boy, oh boy, what a name. Bastamante. Who regularly performs the procedure. Yet lushful aesthetics.

[Chick McGee]

I guarantee he loves it.

[Christy Lee]

Told the New York Post it's appealing to Gen Z and millennials who are a lot more curious and adventurous when it comes to enhancing their sex lives with unconventional methods. Mr. Bustamante shared that most clients who undergo the $900 procedure are men between the ages of 25 and 40, and around 30% of them fly in from out of state specifically for the treatment. Apparently it takes about three minutes to complete.

[Tom Griswold]

So this is a gay thing.

[Christy Lee]

I think you're. You could make that assumption if you'd like.

[Chick McGee]

I mean, if maybe some of our gay listeners let us know.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

So you're upgrading your B hole to an A hole. I like it.

[Christy Lee]

I like that too.

[Chick McGee]

Actually, I'll stick with the C hole. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, the Botox isn't. That's used to take wrinkles out of your face. Right? That's what they do with that.

[Christy Lee]

Huh?

[Tom Griswold]

So in this case, I assume it's going to take the wrinkles out.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, that's what they're saying.

[Tom Griswold]

Make your.

[Bob]

Well, I don't think. I don't think it will. I don't think there's any way to take those wrinkles out? No, make sure.

[Tom Griswold]

Makes your chocolate starfish look like a lifesaver. Nice and smooth.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Bob]

Is that what I would have thought?

[Chick McGee]

Botox tightened things back there. I wouldn't have known that. It relaxes and loosens, which is what they're saying is good for constipation.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, you're right.

[Tom Griswold]

And isn't it poison?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, it's botulism.

[Tom Griswold]

Isn't that the whole thing?

[Bob]

Yeah, well, you got to be really careful.

[Tom Griswold]

You can just give yourself an enema with bon vival Vichy swa soup.

[Bob]

It's numbing. It's. It won't let anything move like you can't. You're. Your forehead won't go up when you smile or whatever. It's all just freezes your face.

[Chick McGee]

Basically a paralytic almost.

[Bob]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Well, it's out there, ladies and gentlemen. And now you know. What was the name of the clinic again? Lushful Lushville.

[Christy Lee]

Lushful Aesthetics.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, it takes three minutes, but it's 900 bucks. That'd be a good deal. Next. Yeah, okay. Hey, I'll look at those all day if it's that kind of money. $50,000 last hour and giving guys little pricks in the back.

[Bob]

Coming up in sports, UFC fight is going to be a very unique location. They're thinking about it for next year. And also octopi, octopuses and sports and.

[Tom Griswold]

Science and your tongue are coming up from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios.

[Bob]

Cannot wait.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, these. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Ace Cosby]

Want to share a letter or comment? Our email is Bob and Tom. Bob and Tom.

[Bob]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. Christy Lee at the Silac Insurance news desk. Hello, there's Jeff Oskay.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Bob]

Josh Arnold.

[Tom Griswold]

Hi there.

[Bob]

Ace Cosby.

[Chick McGee]

Hello.

[Bob]

We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. I'm Chick McGee. Hello, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello, Chick McGee. Now, we got off track. We were investigating the world of sports.

[Bob]

There's an influencer. I don't know if this is sports or not, but I thought Tom would really enjoy this story. His name is. I'm not going to give a screen name because he's an influencer and he already has 3 million followers.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I didn't need any more.

[Bob]

His name is A Mecca E M E K A. And you have only recently decided that you're not going any open bodies water anymore. You've had it with the shark attacks. You're not.

[Chick McGee]

Not doing.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm not gonna. We'll see. Why do you ask?

[Bob]

Because this Gentleman, he got 70 million hits because he put an octopus on his head.

[Chick McGee]

Not smart. I mean that.

[Christy Lee]

A wild octopus.

[Bob]

And then he says, that could go terribly wrong, basically. You guys have seen the octopus where I put it on my head. I filmed it at the beach. The ink from the octopus got into my eye and I have swelling on my eyelid and I've been hospitalized. Yeah. So what I'm saying is don't put. Do not put an octopus on your head.

[Christy Lee]

And sometimes they won't let go.

[Bob]

Yeah, that's.

[Tom Griswold]

And it's so creepy. It's like that alien monster.

[Bob]

Some octopus can inject venom from their. They call those beaks.

[Chick McGee]

Right? From their beaks.

[Bob]

Yeah, from there.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow. Yeah. Okay. No, thanks. No, thank you.

[Bob]

Paramount and UFC have announced that billion dollar rights deal marking a significant shift for the fight company. UFC CEO Dana White is also set to meet with President Donald Trump to discuss a proposed Fourth of July fight card at the White House.

[Chick McGee]

Yep.

[Bob]

On the law.

[Chick McGee]

I had heard rumblings of that. So they are. They are considering it.

[Bob]

The seven year deal with Paramount starting in 26 is worth. Worth just over a billion annually. It will feature all UFC content on Paramount plus and select events on cbs.

[Christy Lee]

Do they have to eat hot dogs first?

[Bob]

White is optimistic about the future.

[Tom Griswold]

That's in New York City, remember?

[Christy Lee]

I know, but they can move it to the White House.

[Chick McGee]

Why wouldn't they just have a double header?

[Bob]

Oh, yeah, well, that is America, right? Hot dog eating, organized gluttony.

[Christy Lee]

And Joey Chestnut takes on and give me a wrestler name.

[Chick McGee]

I don't know, Russ.

[Jeff Oskay]

I think they should. I think it'd be great if they did it at the White House. But all the fighters have to be congressmen.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

They have to just battle it out.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, now we're talking.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, I would watch that all day.

[Chick McGee]

Finally, just having to get physical with their disagreements.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I'd love it.

[Christy Lee]

One Republican, one Democrat.

[Tom Griswold]

Gerrymander, my ass.

[Bob]

We get the way in where they slap each other.

[Chick McGee]

Wait, do you think it'll be outdoors or in.

[Bob]

It's on the lawn, I guess. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Cool.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Bob]

You know, there's no back door at the White House. It's all entrances.

[Christy Lee]

Didn't he pave the Rose Garden and make a big deck out there or something?

[Tom Griswold]

The proposal is they're going to build a huge, huge addition. Yeah, A ballroom on the White House itself. Himself.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I see. Not. Not strictly for this event.

[Tom Griswold]

No. For in perpetuity.

[Bob]

Did they get Bob Vila to do.

[Chick McGee]

It on the day? Why wouldn't you get Vel.

[Bob]

Yeah, sure.

[Tom Griswold]

He's the man.

[Chick McGee]

Or those twins.

[Bob]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Then you get to meet Zoe Deschanel.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, they're cute, too. Yes.

[Bob]

You know, she's not a bad singer. That's great.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Bob]

She and him. Yeah, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

They're wonderful.

[Bob]

They have a good.

[Jeff Oskay]

Wait, she's dating a property brother.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Jeff Oskay]

I'm assuming the straight one.

[Tom Griswold]

One?

[Christy Lee]

The other one's married.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, they're.

[Christy Lee]

They're.

[Jeff Oskay]

They're both straight.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Bob]

Oh, my God.

[Tom Griswold]

Huh?

[Christy Lee]

Did I just rock your world?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. I honestly got to get a change that fantasy. A frame, me boys.

[Tom Griswold]

The A frame.

[Chick McGee]

They wouldn't call it the Eiffel Tower.

[Bob]

No, it'd be the A frame. Absolutely right. All roof. A Nigerian. A Nigerian musician has broken the Guinness World Record for the longest marathon playing the trumpet.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, man. This has to be. That's got a confidence.

[Bob]

An ordeal. Joshua Olasanya, known online as the Trumpet Influencer.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh.

[Bob]

Didn't really think that. Too much through achieve the record title. He played for 25 hours, 30 minutes, 36 seconds.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, his lips have to be chapped.

[Bob]

He noted that a significant setback occurred when his lip suffered severe fatigue.

[Chick McGee]

I would think so.

[Bob]

An injury causing substantial pain.

[Tom Griswold]

Ah.

[Bob]

Joshua said the prospect of quitting was tempting, but I drew upon my mental reserves and perseverance to push through that critical moment.

[Christy Lee]

I bet he has a happy wife.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yes. Look at this guy, tooting his own horn.

[Tom Griswold]

Huh? Huh?

[Chick McGee]

I wish I had mental reserves.

[Bob]

I'd like fortitude.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, yeah.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Good.

[Bob]

An inner strength. Tom.

[Chick McGee]

You know, integrity would be nice.

[Bob]

Integrity.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, come on.

[Chick McGee]

You think it's overrated.

[Tom Griswold]

We can't order all of these things at the same day. So does someone from Guinness have to sit there and watch this for 25 hours?

[Bob]

I hope I had ear muffs on or something.

[Tom Griswold]

Take requests.

[Bob]

I mean, I.

[Tom Griswold]

Is he gonna play that?

[Bob]

I don't know. Why? There haven't been that many trumpet instrumentals. I guess. Herb Albert, now that I say that. Oh, no.

[Tom Griswold]

The guy that just died.

[Christy Lee]

Chuck Mangione.

[Bob]

Well, that's a Google horn. Technically.

[Jeff Oskay]

Okay.

[Chick McGee]

Yes. Yay.

[Jeff Oskay]

Let's.

[Bob]

Let's.

[Chick McGee]

Facts.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, you got Reveley, you got Taps.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

What I'm saying, you got the Tower of Power horn section. They're great.

[Bob]

That's good. So very hard to go.

[Tom Griswold]

What is hip?

[Bob]

What a great song.

[Tom Griswold]

What a great song that is.

[Bob]

No, so very hard to go is better. That's sports.

[Tom Griswold]

No, but what does hip makes you want to move and dance like you move and Dance I do in my own special way.

[Bob]

I see you sitting in the. No, not sitting there. Standing at the counter, making something. Just barely moving your head. When what?

[Tom Griswold]

Is it cool?

[Bob]

Because you're cool.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Bob]

When's the last time you danced? When's the last time?

[Tom Griswold]

This morning.

[Christy Lee]

Really?

[Chick McGee]

I saw him dance not an hour ago.

[Bob]

Really?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, it was right behind you. Yeah, he did a little dance.

[Bob]

No kidding?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, man.

[Tom Griswold]

Did a little pantomime dance.

[Bob]

Did you?

[Tom Griswold]

To indicate to Jason to go get my tea.

[Bob]

You flipped me off and did a little dance. Is that what you're doing behind me?

[Tom Griswold]

Pantomime me? Hey, look, I need. You gotta go grab my tea for me. I left it in the other room, and I gotta go in the air here.

[Christy Lee]

When you do dishes and you're in the kitchen, do you play music?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Quite often?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Lately, unfortunately, it's. Kelly's been in charge of the music, and a little banjo goes a long way. That's all I want to say.

[Christy Lee]

Okay, fair enough.

[Chick McGee]

A lot of Mumford and Son.

[Bob]

Yeah, I would have never thought. Banjo.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, a lot of that. A lot of that Americana stuff with a lot of banjo.

[Bob]

I love my Americana, but I can't.

[Tom Griswold]

A little bit, like. A little bit of mandolin, a little bit of banjo. Oh, then maybe next tune, let's have them take a smoke break.

[Jeff Oskay]

Is there a lot of crowd singing on it where, like, the other people in the room join in to see.

[Chick McGee]

A lot of groups yelling, hey, yeah, yeah. Hey, Hey.

[Tom Griswold]

A lot of white folks.

[Bob]

Do you have your. Is your home speakers everywhere? Do you have the Apple speakers? You got the speakers? Yeah, yeah, I hate them. Have you tried the Apple.

[Tom Griswold]

Pain in the ass, The Apple speakers?

[Christy Lee]

You have speakers all over your house and you hate them.

[Tom Griswold]

It's impossible.

[Christy Lee]

They don't work.

[Tom Griswold]

No, they work. It just. Yeah, you gotta. You gotta go to that wall and press eight buttons. That never works. I just.

[Jeff Oskay]

It's worse than our control center in the station here. There are so many servers and racks, and it looks like he's running a TV station.

[Tom Griswold]

Impossible. I just have a radio I keep in the bedroom.

[Christy Lee]

I have a little Amazon Echo. And you just go, hey, play da da da da da. And it plays. It. It's awesome.

[Chick McGee]

But then the FBI knows what you're playing.

[Christy Lee]

I don't care.

[Chick McGee]

Thought about that?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, whatever. Let them watch me cook. And. I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

I just found out they know who I'm venmoing.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Bob]

Private. Set it on Private.

[Jeff Oskay]

I'm doing that right now.

[Bob]

There you Go.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Oh, well, thank you very much. Good to know. Coming up in the news, we have alligators. In the news, we have an unusual story about speeding. Again, we've had a couple big speeding stories lately. Yeah, this isn't. This one has an interesting twist to it. We have an insurance scam, but this time they're caught on video trying to do the scam. There's a hand soap recall that's pretty serious. So before you wash up today, hang out for that. And also your tongue and science in the news.

[Bob]

Right, my tongue. My tongue and diet.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Now just saying that now I'm gonna.

[Chick McGee]

Have trouble getting science.

[Tom Griswold]

The Bob and Tom Show. The Bob and Tom show was sponsored by Better Health Help. Feels like you get advice for everything these days. You tell someone what's going on in your life and they go, what you need to do is. And then something they read off the the Internet from some influencer usually trying to sell you some kind of potion or pills. But something called talk therapy is extraordinarily effective if you've got issues you're trying to deal with rather than maybe getting into an ice bath, maybe talk to a therapist. That's what better Help is all about. Better help. BetterHelp has some 30,000 therapists on hand and on hand, I mean, right there in your phone. BetterHelp is the world's largest online therapy provider and they've served more than 5 million people. This is kind of interesting. They're rating right now 4.9 out of 5 ratings on their for their live sessions. So BetterHelp is all about getting access to talk therapy on either your laptop or your smartphone or whatever. It's so, so it's incredibly convenient that therapy is done online. You'll be assigned a therapist. You can switch there. You can switch therapists, I should say, at any time. And they've got therapists with a variety of specialties. So find out all the details by going to betterhelp.com btshow. I urge you to go to the btshow thing because Bob and Tom show listeners get 10% off their first month. So talk it out with BetterHelp once again. BetterHelp. H E L P betterhelp.com btshow Also coming up, great white sharks off the coast of Maine here in the USA and our history lesson just around the corner. And then sexy time with Ali Breen. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Bob]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show.

[Tom Griswold]

I think you skipped I did, skip.

[Bob]

I went under a bridge. There's Christy Lee.

[Christy Lee]

Hello.

[Bob]

There's Jeff. Oscar.

[Chick McGee]

Yep.

[Bob]

Hello, Josh. Arnold.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, man.

[Bob]

Ace Cosby. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts studios. Think O'Reilly Auto Parts for all your car care needs. Get the parts and service you need fast from the professional parts people at O'Reilly Auto Parts. Hello, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello, Chick McGee. It's good seeing you, sir. We're going to move on and switch gears and head over to the SILAC Insurance news desk. That's where you'll find. Find Christy Lee.

[Christy Lee]

You've been warning people about this, so I thought we'd bring it up. The manufacturer recalling a line of hand soap after tests found it may be contained contaminated with dangerous bacteria.

[Chick McGee]

That's the opposite of what you want from your soap, right?

[Christy Lee]

It seems silly.

[Tom Griswold]

Keep reading. It actually gets worse. Derma.

[Christy Lee]

Right. Industry says certain lots of its foaming hand soap could contain Pseudomonas aeriogenosa.

[Bob]

Oh, not Pseudomonas aeria. Junosa.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, it's a bacteria that can cause serious and life threatening infections, especially in people with weakened immune systems.

[Tom Griswold]

Also the name of a really pretentious alt rock band.

[Christy Lee]

Pseudo Monuis. The soap was sold nationwide in gallon jugs between December 2023 and May of 24.

[Bob]

You know how you buy it, Tom? Gallon jugs.

[Christy Lee]

The company says anyone who purchased the affected product should stop using it immediately in return for a refund. The FDA says pseudomonosis infections can enter through cuts or breaks in the skin, potentially causing bloodstream infections or sepsis. And that we all know.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, my gosh.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, it can kill you. But here's what the first clue to me is. The name of the company is Dermaclean.

[Bob]

Derma. Right.

[Christy Lee]

Said Derma. Right.

[Tom Griswold]

In mine, that's the. Dermaclean is one of the lots. Oh, the, the, the bigger company is Derma, Right?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

They're are four brands that they cite here. They spell clean. K, L, E, E, N. Oh, there you go.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Bob]

Derma, though. Epidermis.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. But if they don't know how to.

[Tom Griswold]

Spell clean, they have one called Clean foam. K, L, E, E, N. Oh, they.

[Chick McGee]

Got to knock that off.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, that.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

But didn't you say it stopped selling in 24?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

And they're just now letting us know.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. That's kind of bad.

[Chick McGee]

Well, it takes about a year for.

[Jeff Oskay]

Everyone to die off.

[Bob]

Let me tell you a little bit about class action lawsuits.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, this is Derma. Right. Industries makes these and there's a couple different brands. One of Them is called boy. I don't know how to pronounce this one. Perigueni. Perigene, maybe. I think you P E R I G I E N E. And that's an antiseptic cleanser for the perineal area.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, no kidding. The tank.

[Tom Griswold]

So that's. There's a special soap for the old.

[Bob]

Well, you gotta. You know, you're gonna. Perineum, you're gonna entertain. You gotta wash. Yeah. You know you're gonna give your kitchen a shower.

[Tom Griswold]

Wouldn't regular soap be okay?

[Bob]

Well, not for your perineum, really.

[Tom Griswold]

Everybody knows I've been using Ivory soap and I could.

[Bob]

Oh, no, you don't want to use that.

[Christy Lee]

Do you really still use Ivory soap?

[Bob]

You use whatever your mommy told you to use, don't you?

[Tom Griswold]

I have bars of Ivory soap in my shower right now.

[Christy Lee]

You honestly do?

[Bob]

Bars?

[Tom Griswold]

Absolutely.

[Bob]

How many bars you don't use?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, the. Right now, probably. Well, there's one more or less full bar. Then I have the slivers of some of the old ones.

[Christy Lee]

Don't you stack them on top?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, stack them on top. Make a little Ivory soap sandwich.

[Bob]

You know what you do? You put those in the microwave, heat them up a little bit, and they mush right together.

[Tom Griswold]

I did not know that.

[Bob]

Oh, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Why don't you buy this stuff? Like, what about shower wash?

[Bob]

What he likes body wash. No, no, no, no.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, you do you.

[Tom Griswold]

I like having a bar of soap, every once in a while it accidentally slips all the way in. You know what I'm talking about?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, boy. That can be hard to retrieve.

[Christy Lee]

You just said that on the air.

[Tom Griswold]

It's a joke.

[Chick McGee]

I like doing that. I put it all the way in and see if I can burp bubbles.

[Bob]

Think about that with the perineum soap. Now, come on now.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah. I didn't mean to confuse anybody, but yeah. This company has. This article goes on forever describing which of the soaps have been recalled. But the fact that it could. The one of them can cause sepsis.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, that's not good.

[Tom Griswold]

Pretty serious.

[Chick McGee]

I use that special perineal soap, Taint misbehavin. Pretty good. I found it less abrasive than taint your wagon.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, Taint misavaving was pretty solid. Taint your wagon. Kind of a stranger stretch. Lee Marvin, one of his lesser efforts.

[Bob]

Did I tell you one of the times my mom and dad were the maddest. They went to the drive through. They were waiting for paint your wagon because Clint Eastwood and Lee Marvin. And Lee Marvin are In this movie. This has got to be action wall to wall.

[Chick McGee]

You got Cat Ballou and the man with no Name in the same movie.

[Tom Griswold]

And it turns out to be.

[Bob]

It's a musical.

[Tom Griswold]

What?

[Bob]

They were so mad.

[Chick McGee]

I've heard it's embarrassing.

[Bob]

Paint your wagon.

[Chick McGee]

But is it as bad do you think as people?

[Tom Griswold]

People?

[Christy Lee]

Have you not seen it?

[Chick McGee]

I have not seen.

[Christy Lee]

I haven't seen it.

[Chick McGee]

Charlie McLean, the love interest.

[Bob]

I do not know.

[Chick McGee]

I like her. She's spunky.

[Bob]

Yeah, yeah, spunky. The apartment. She was spunky.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. In any event, be careful. If you have any of these products from Derma right now.

[Chick McGee]

Do you have any.

[Tom Griswold]

And they spell right. Wrong. Also D, E, R, M. Would you ever R, I, T E. I mean right there. Yeah.

[Bob]

Would you ever switch to a body wash? Some sort of lotion? Do you use a washcloth cloth or you just use the bar soap?

[Tom Griswold]

I have a washcloth on occasion.

[Chick McGee]

On occasion I'm back to bar Soap.

[Christy Lee]

Really?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Dr. Squatch. But I have not a washcloth but a soap sack that you put. You put the bar of soap in. And it's a washcloth material all around. And I use that and it is fantastic.

[Tom Griswold]

And then, then does it dry with your.

[Chick McGee]

It does. It dries. And then every new bar season crust to. Yes, wash. Because the true you're feel you're film true men don't wipe. They just wait until they shower.

[Tom Griswold]

That's right.

[Bob]

That's exactly right.

[Chick McGee]

I look like a. The soul of a construction boot back there.

[Tom Griswold]

On a. After a rainy day.

[Bob]

Back there. You mean back there.

[Christy Lee]

Do you change it out every bar of soap?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

They get. They send you a new one or do you know.

[Chick McGee]

I have two and so you wash one. I wash one. While. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

While the others do use a pure soap or do you use a deodorant soap?

[Chick McGee]

I think it's just pure soap, but. Oh, wait. What are you saying? I don't know the difference.

[Bob]

Well, you know, ivory soap is 99 and 100. 99 and 100.

[Tom Griswold]

It's a soap. It doesn't have like it's not scented.

[Chick McGee]

Mine's 99.5% lie. It's just.

[Jeff Oskay]

You feel it.

[Tom Griswold]

You'll notice here that I, I. We have nothing but unscented so soap.

[Chick McGee]

I have not noticed that because I use the scented soaps.

[Bob]

I use the scented soap in the men's.

[Tom Griswold]

I hate the scented soap.

[Bob]

Well, it's in the men's and the women.

[Chick McGee]

By the way, those soaps are great. Those, those sense and, you know, I'm very sensitive.

[Christy Lee]

They're not bad.

[Bob]

They're fine.

[Chick McGee]

Sensitive, but, yeah, they're good. They're good.

[Tom Griswold]

No, the Meyer. No, it sounds like you've been, you know, fisting. Where do you round healed at a Naval Base, 1905.

[Bob]

What unscented soap do you think we have here that we don't.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, we have the squirty unscented. Where.

[Bob]

Where is that?

[Tom Griswold]

Should be in the. In the men's room.

[Bob]

No.

[Christy Lee]

Should you not wash your hands after?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, we're all using.

[Christy Lee]

We're all using the same.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm with Josh. I don't wash them. I just wait till the end of the day, get an hour. But I mean this. If you're buying soap and it's actually could potentially kill you, that's. It's not right.

[Chick McGee]

No, it isn't right. No, no.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, buying a salad and finding out it's deep. Frost. Just. You're. You're trying to get.

[Chick McGee]

You know, you have me before that.

[Tom Griswold]

Analogy, so be careful. If you've got. Whatever it is. Dermaclean.

[Jeff Oskay]

Has anyone ever said this, like, I feel like you should wash your hands before you restroom more than after we.

[Tom Griswold]

Had that news story.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, really?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, just recently.

[Jeff Oskay]

Because I. Yeah, I never understood the app. Like, I'm not dirty. Like, why Just peeing. I'm not even touching anything.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, you touch.

[Tom Griswold]

You touch. You touch it, don't you?

[Christy Lee]

No, no, no.

[Jeff Oskay]

I just pull down and flop it out.

[Tom Griswold]

And then you're free. You free for it?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, I don't. I don't hold my wiener the whole time I'm peeing.

[Christy Lee]

You don't?

[Chick McGee]

No, no.

[Christy Lee]

It's not like all guys do like.

[Chick McGee]

A fire hose where you have to.

[Bob]

Oh, yeah, you gotta hold.

[Tom Griswold]

I gotta hold it.

[Christy Lee]

I thought it was.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, you don't.

[Bob]

You gotta hold.

[Jeff Oskay]

Well, he has to keep it out of the way. Water.

[Tom Griswold]

So.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, of course.

[Bob]

Too large.

[Tom Griswold]

How do you think I got?

[Jeff Oskay]

Tennis elbow?

[Tom Griswold]

You just holds a ton.

[Chick McGee]

You just hold it so that somebody's touching.

[Bob]

Let me tell you that when you said last week, I don't want to have sex infrequently enough that everybody knows.

[Chick McGee]

When I got, like, my biggest fear, that.

[Bob]

That went a long way with yours. True.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. But we did have a thing, I was just recently. About washing hands.

[Christy Lee]

Before you go.

[Tom Griswold]

Before you go.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, okay.

[Bob]

And I say both. Why not both?

[Tom Griswold]

What was. And part of the story was, particularly if you're eating. What was it, Mexican food or something.

[Christy Lee]

You don't want to burn your. You get chili pepper down there or something?

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, chili pepper, Peter.

[Chick McGee]

It's got to be as bad for women.

[Tom Griswold]

Peter Peck.

[Chick McGee]

I get nervous for girls. Why doesn't I. I don't know. I feel like it's a very. It's so such a sensitive area that even soap down there would sting. I. I get.

[Bob]

Well, if you have an opening.

[Chick McGee]

I know I just. In my head, of course.

[Christy Lee]

But yeah, I don't have that problem.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, I know, I know. But I just worry about you ladies.

[Christy Lee]

Well, thank you. I appreciate that.

[Tom Griswold]

You want to once again mansplain the menstrual periods to them. If you're just joining us. Hello. Hey, thanks for being here. We are in the aureliotto part Studios. This is the Bob and Tom show. And we just were talking about the recall of a certain brand of soap. So be careful out there.

[Christy Lee]

And keeping with our medical theme, scientists have created an artificial tongue that tastes and learns like a real human organ.

[Bob]

That's right.

[Christy Lee]

The artificial tongue works by dissolving chemical compounds in liquid and then quote, unquote, learns the unique patterns for various chemical compounds in order to identify the flavors and remember them. In the experiment, the device identified four basic tastes. Sweet, sour, salty and bitter. With 72.5% to 87.5% accuracy. It had 96% accuracy for drinks with multiple flavor profiles like coffee and Coca Cola. According to researchers, the tongue could lead to automated systems for food safety and early detection of diseases through tasting analysis.

[Tom Griswold]

Huh.

[Chick McGee]

So that's the practical application for it.

[Christy Lee]

I don't think you can hear.

[Chick McGee]

It's not a transplant, right?

[Christy Lee]

Not a tongue transplant.

[Chick McGee]

Tongue cancer or whatever. This could be your.

[Tom Griswold]

No, the spokesman said he's still working on it.

[Chick McGee]

If I. If anybody invents a time machine, the first thing I'll do is go back in time and not look at him when he did that. You're gonna go kill Hitler? No, I gotta take care of something first.

[Bob]

Hang on a second.

[Tom Griswold]

Artificial tongue sounds like a Shakespearean thing.

[Chick McGee]

Yes. Yes. You know what? It kind of sounds like a.

[Tom Griswold]

Don't trust that. Don't trust Daf man. He speak with artificial tongue.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

The friar is a liar. Well, I. It'll be interesting to see if this. I. I guess. So this is sort of for industrial use or something? This is.

[Christy Lee]

Sounds like it. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Something you're going to have at the house. The king no longer needs the taster. I'll pass the artificial tongue over here. I want to see if this is poison.

[Chick McGee]

Christy, your husband comes down unfortunately, with some sort of awful parasite.

[Bob]

I have a parasite.

[Chick McGee]

And it can either eat away his penis or his tongue.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, my gosh. Are you gonna make me pick?

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Bob]

Well, she answered a lot of questions right there with that.

[Chick McGee]

I don't even want an answer now. I just love that there's a. A dilemma that you. It's going to be tough for you.

[Tom Griswold]

To decide and she gets to decide.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yes, that's.

[Chick McGee]

That is. That is a good point.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

I have no say in this.

[Christy Lee]

I know he would pick his.

[Tom Griswold]

No, it gets. One of them is destroyed.

[Bob]

Yeah, hang on a second. Cut her tongue out, please. Just cut her down. No, no, he's gonna.

[Tom Griswold]

He's gonna want. Want.

[Chick McGee]

Is wiener.

[Christy Lee]

His wiener.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. Yeah. So his next word's going to be.

[Chick McGee]

At least I got a thing.

[Bob]

I can't take that.

[Tom Griswold]

Back. Her.

[Chick McGee]

She.

[Bob]

Well, at least she touches it now.

[Christy Lee]

Man, I took a turn, didn't it?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Good. A nice dilemma to suggest that'll be sort of a classic.

[Christy Lee]

A woman from Wales.

[Tom Griswold]

Schrodinger's. No, I can't say that, but Schrodinger's Box. What have you got over there?

[Christy Lee]

A woman from Wales claims she makes over $3,000 a month by selling videos of herself breaking wind.

[Bob]

Oh, not that one. Whale. Okay, sorry.

[Chick McGee]

Three times 12. What is that, 36, 000 a year? Not bad.

[Christy Lee]

According to Wales Online, the 28 year old known only online as Christy farts. Not spelled my way.

[Tom Griswold]

So it's Kirsty.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, I'm sorry, you're right.

[Tom Griswold]

Kirsty Alley Farts.

[Bob]

It's Christy Farts. Everybody heard it. And we're gonna start my fart.

[Christy Lee]

Everybody farts, right?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, boy, you just made somebody's day.

[Bob]

Oh, I was Christie. Fart on me.

[Christy Lee]

Kirsty says she started recording herself passing gas after receiving a hefty vet bill.

[Chick McGee]

Okay. So she needed to make ends meet real quick.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. After a little over a year, the influencer and only fans creator now claims to have almost 9,000 fans, mostly in America, and earns as much as $3,100 a month for her Flatulence themed content.

[Bob]

USA. USA.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow. Wow.

[Christy Lee]

She says she is naturally super gassy and uploads up to 60 videos a month.

[Chick McGee]

60? That's two a day.

[Christy Lee]

Including clips of herself passing gas into her perfume. Yeah, you like this or farting on a brush?

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Now I'm gonna comb your hair.

[Bob]

Yeah, Run that through his hair. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

While her father is unaware of this unusual side hustle, he don't know her mom says she's proud of her. Her.

[Chick McGee]

Honey, I. You know, it brings a tear to my eye. What? How proud you are. No, no. That gas.

[Jeff Oskay]

Boy.

[Tom Griswold]

Man. Oh, God.

[Chick McGee]

You know, she could be doing worse.

[Christy Lee]

True.

[Tom Griswold]

It could be. What? What is it? What's her. Her name is Kirsty.

[Christy Lee]

Kirsty.

[Tom Griswold]

So it could be. And she goes by. What is it? Kirsty Farts.

[Christy Lee]

Kirsty Farts.

[Tom Griswold]

Could be Kirsty Queefs. Oh, my. That probably get more money, don't you think?

[Chick McGee]

I think so. Yeah. Maybe. Maybe she should branch out.

[Jeff Oskay]

I wonder if the customers have like a specific. Like, hey, I want you to eat, you know, green bean casserole or kimchi, then fart, you know, on chopsticks or whatever.

[Chick McGee]

They fart in your purse. Like if there's just fart in a shoe or.

[Jeff Oskay]

I wonder if it's a. I wonder if it's a shot of the actual.

[Chick McGee]

I know if you get some. If you can see some flexing.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

No, they can't be naked.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm just reading down here. This says she's. Well, she's fully clothed mostly with her clothes on.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, maybe she wears a thong or something like.

[Chick McGee]

Maybe they want to see, like, it. Purse, if you will. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

See, this is.

[Chick McGee]

Shock her up.

[Jeff Oskay]

If you wear a thong. Is that cutting wind? Does it divide it when it comes out?

[Chick McGee]

What is farting in the face thong like Christy.

[Christy Lee]

Ah, boy, it's been a long time since I've worn a thong. I don't recall.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, here's your assignment. Tune in tomorrow.

[Chick McGee]

Man, oh, man. Wouldn't you go with a fun pun, though, if you were a only fans fartist. Not. Not just Kirsty farts, but far. Like.

[Bob]

Did she call herself a fartist?

[Chick McGee]

No, but I. I calls herself.

[Tom Griswold]

She calls herself, isn't it? Didn't you say she calls herself an influencer?

[Christy Lee]

Yes, a fart influencer, I would say.

[Bob]

Yeah, a fartist is much better. Better when you go to the fartist.

[Chick McGee]

Mary Fartman. Mary Fart.

[Tom Griswold]

What's another I'm trying to think of in fartist word sounds like influencer.

[Bob]

You know, what the fart wants, the fart gets.

[Tom Griswold]

Right? Flatulencer.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Home is where the fart is.

[Christy Lee]

I'm glad that's not here. He doesn't like the word fart, does he? Oh, no, it's really.

[Bob]

I'm not crazy about it.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I'm with you here, but in.

[Chick McGee]

This case it's, you know.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

A fart is Mama gas. Is that word.

[Bob]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

If there was, would there be like the Mamas and the Papas.

[Chick McGee]

Right, right. So Mama Gas. I'm just trying to think of do.

[Tom Griswold]

Instrumental versions of their, their big hits with the Fart sound instead. Miles.

[Chick McGee]

Monday.

[Tom Griswold]

Monday.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Why would you prefer. This is dedicated to the one I love.

[Chick McGee]

California Steaming.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, these, these are all terrible ideas.

[Bob]

All the leaves are brown.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, they weren't brown until my panties. See, this is why you want to listen to this show. Because you've learned another reason. You're glad you don't have this.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Glad you didn't get up this morning and have to check in with Kirsty Farts to make your day.

[Chick McGee]

Please fart my eyes.

[Bob]

Okay, Fart my eyes.

[Tom Griswold]

Coming up, a little bit of a history lesson. We have also an attempted insurance fraud that's quite funny. And a positive news from the world of rescues. We got a happy one with a nice sweet ending right now. I want to say a special load of Chick Magee. He's over there getting ready to feel good and safe because we've got Simply Safe right here in our building guarding us right now.

[Bob]

That's right, Simply Safe. We use it here at the Bob and Tom studios. A system that works to prevent that break in. What? That's right. Simply Safe has new active guard outdoor protection that helps stop the break ins before they happen. SimpliSafe has AI powered cameras and live monitoring agents to detect suspicious activity around your property. If you have a lurker, agents can talk to that lurker in real time, turn on spotlights, even call the police proactively deterring crime before it starts. No contracts, no hidden fees. And it's been named best home security system of 2025 by seat net Monitoring Plants start around a dollar a day and we've got even a better deal for you. Stick around and a 60 day money back guarantee. So visit simplisafetom.com to claim 50% off a new system with a professional monitoring plan and get your first month free. That's simply safe. Tom.com Remember, there's no safe like simply.

[Tom Griswold]

Say thank you very much, Chick McGee coming up. Also Sexy time with Ali Breen. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Ace Cosby]

More of the is on the way. You can find us on X at Bob and Tom or you can email us at Bob and Tom. Bob and Tom dot com.

[Bob]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob at Tom Show. There's Christy Lee.

[Christy Lee]

Hey, Jeff.

[Bob]

Oscar.

[Jeff Oskay]

Hey, man.

[Chick McGee]

Josh Arnold is the Kombucha phase over. Are people done with that?

[Bob]

I think so. That's still out there.

[Chick McGee]

I haven't seen him much lately. For a while there, it was like every, every person age 25 to 35 I saw walk by, had a bottle.

[Tom Griswold]

Of candy, but now they're hidden. They're hidden in their Stanleys.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Gotcha.

[Bob]

There's Ace Cosby. I'm Chick mcgee.

[Chick McGee]

Hello.

[Bob]

Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Have you ever, did you ever try the.

[Chick McGee]

I did, Yeah. I, I, it wasn't. I felt like I was drinking it solely for health benefit, not for enjoyment.

[Bob]

I couldn't get over the odor.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. There's a grocery store I go to that has a lot of flavors of that stuff, though.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

And it was okay, but. And it also has some floaty stuff in there that can be a little.

[Christy Lee]

Odd, like coconut or something. I've never had it.

[Bob]

It's like a membranous sea monkeys.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

I didn't realize it was like a carbonated beverage. And so because it had a bunch of stuff, I shook it up to try to mix it.

[Chick McGee]

Right.

[Jeff Oskay]

And then opened it in the spring store because I was grocery shopping and I made a hu. I had to go get a mop. Made a huge mess. I had no idea.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. I don't know if that phase is over. That's a fair question.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

That was very big there.

[Chick McGee]

Did you ever try it?

[Tom Griswold]

I bought a lot of it. Never. I'd never liked it.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

One sip and said, not for me.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, I love it. I love the ginger.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

That's my jam.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, nice, man.

[Tom Griswold]

Really?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

Every time I go to Meyer Shop and I grab one off the count.

[Tom Griswold]

Off the shelf, you pay for it.

[Christy Lee]

And you drink it while you're shopping. Shopping?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

I pay for it at the end.

[Bob]

Oh, no, I don't. Not until they come up with a way to X ray my belly for liquid. They're not catching me.

[Christy Lee]

You hide the empty bottle somewhere on a shelf.

[Tom Griswold]

It's time now to learn a little something.

[Bob]

Wait a minute. Isn't that true, though? If you're in the grocery store and you have something, you need to put it back, it can go anywhere. Right.

[Christy Lee]

A lot of people do that.

[Chick McGee]

I don't do that, but yeah, that's seems to be. I take it all the way back.

[Bob]

Do you?

[Chick McGee]

I consider it a fool's tax. I messed up.

[Tom Griswold]

Let me get this right. You've taken food back?

[Chick McGee]

Yes. Oh, boy. I look around at who's laughing at that and, well, I'm not. I have questions.

[Bob]

No, no, Christie's just going, whoa.

[Christy Lee]

Whoa. Can't believe you said that.

[Bob]

Why?

[Tom Griswold]

You just can't set me up like that.

[Chick McGee]

You're right.

[Tom Griswold]

Right. But I'm with you. I. If I, for whatever reason, have got. If I found this. Oh, I was actually one of this brand. Yes, I will.

[Bob]

And I suppose you two take your carts back, too? The cart.

[Chick McGee]

I'm very good about that.

[Christy Lee]

I'm very good about that.

[Tom Griswold]

Don't park next to the cart corral.

[Bob]

Never.

[Jeff Oskay]

Are you serious?

[Bob]

No, of course.

[Tom Griswold]

That guy. Oh, my Lord.

[Chick McGee]

That's not fun.

[Jeff Oskay]

Well, I see the way you drive through the yard every morning. You have no respect for grass.

[Bob]

Nope.

[Jeff Oskay]

Why would you have respect for a shopping cart?

[Bob]

Especially that.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, you're the guy that. You drive over the grass island. Oh, yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

Every day.

[Bob]

Everything I can do not to sideswipe your car really is a tough.

[Chick McGee]

I like it. I. I go, oh, there's Chick McGee Trail. It just reminds me of you.

[Bob]

That's right.

[Christy Lee]

And then you back up.

[Bob]

That's right.

[Chick McGee]

Yep.

[Tom Griswold]

It reminds you of him in what way? Duplicity and duplicity.

[Bob]

So I'm a liar now? Okay, all right.

[Tom Griswold]

Lack of. Of respect.

[Bob]

Respect.

[Chick McGee]

No, I honestly go. You know what? He's earned it. He's earned the right to. To drive to this park.

[Bob]

If I couldn't do that every morning, I'm sure I would have a nervous breakdown. That's my one release that I have.

[Tom Griswold]

So that's it. You're driving over where the grass is supposed to be growing. You're the one responsible.

[Bob]

I wanted to park over here in the handicap spot, but they told me, oh, no, you can't do that. Let's move it.

[Chick McGee]

I know. That was a weird power thing.

[Bob]

Yeah, exactly. Right?

[Tom Griswold]

That guy finally got what he deserved.

[Chick McGee]

That bothers no one.

[Christy Lee]

So now you can do it again.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, no one was upset about that.

[Bob]

I don't know.

[Chick McGee]

Park wherever you want. You can park halfway in the building as far as I'm concerned.

[Christy Lee]

Park up the ramp. Wouldn't that take that little car and go right up the ramp?

[Bob]

My little car will not fit on the ramp. But I think your little car will.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, by the way, we're actually talking about cars, not something else. Could we get the music for today in history before we run out of time here? You're gonna like this.

[Bob]

Time down for today. August. Lucky number 13. Number 13.

[Tom Griswold]

You like this, Chick?

[Bob]

Sign of the devil, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

1942, Columbus.

[Bob]

Sell the ocean blue.

[Tom Griswold]

1942. First day of the Manhattan Project.

[Christy Lee]

Oh.

[Bob]

Oh, it was first day okay.

[Christy Lee]

All right. Right.

[Bob]

I knew there was something today with the bomb, but I couldn't remember what it was.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, a great drink.

[Christy Lee]

The Manhattan.

[Tom Griswold]

The Manhattan.

[Christy Lee]

I've never had a Manhattan.

[Bob]

What about the. A great song. I'll take Manhattan.

[Tom Griswold]

The Bronx.

[Jeff Oskay]

It's the only thing I get at MCL is the Manhattan Beef Manhattan.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, that is a good.

[Tom Griswold]

It is ironically, the bomb.

[Chick McGee]

It is. I like Muppets Tail Take Manhattan. That's my favorite of the Muppet films.

[Christy Lee]

What about Manhattan Transfer?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I don't know enough about the.

[Tom Griswold]

Manhattan Transfer kind of an acapella right now.

[Christy Lee]

Bugle Boy of Company B, didn't they do that? Maybe they did, but they did do a version too.

[Tom Griswold]

On this date in 65, the Beatles release. Help. Great.

[Bob]

Can we have one day beetle free?

[Tom Griswold]

How about 1967 Fleetwood Mac forms in London as a blues band.

[Bob]

They the bad version of Fleetwood.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no. There's some great early Fleetwood Mac. Peter Green don't do that. Oh, yeah.

[Bob]

You don't believe that. You just think it sounds elitist.

[Tom Griswold]

No, my favorite Fleetwood Mac song is Pre. Is Pre Lindsay really nothing on the.

[Bob]

First Fleetwood Mac with Buckingham and Nick? Not nothing on rumors?

[Christy Lee]

Nothing on Rumors.

[Bob]

Just. You like that. You like Hypnotized better than all. All that?

[Tom Griswold]

I do.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, wow, that's surprising.

[Tom Griswold]

Hypnotize is a great song.

[Christy Lee]

It's a good song, right?

[Tom Griswold]

Who does that song? Don't you. That's Bob Welch.

[Bob]

Yeah, we know Welch.

[Chick McGee]

But to like that better than Rhiannon or any of that great stuff.

[Bob]

Landslide. Or by the way, oh, Daddy.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, I love Rhiannon. I thought you said you didn't like.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, no, I love it.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, there is a rumor circulating secondhand.

[Bob]

News you're never going back again.

[Tom Griswold]

No, there's a rumor that. What is it? Stevie Nicks and Lindsay Buckingham are going to get back together and take Fleetwood Mac out on the tour. Tour?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Apparently that's not the case. What's happening is they're re releasing the pre Fleetwood Mac album. Buckingham Nicks. Yeah, we talked about that as a.

[Bob]

I have a copy of that.

[Christy Lee]

You said you had like six copies.

[Bob]

I found.

[Christy Lee]

I found money.

[Bob]

I found three. I'm. I'm not sure where the other three are, but.

[Tom Griswold]

Happy birthday, Annie Oakley. Of course. Little sure Shot invented the sunglasses. No.

[Chick McGee]

So she could shoot better.

[Tom Griswold]

Sure.

[Bob]

No, I believe she was from Greenville, Ohio, in dark county with an E. Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

I mentioned this fun fact earlier and this is where I stumbled on it. Born in 1899, Alfred Hitchcock was revolted by the sight of eggs. He said that white round thing without any holes. Have you ever seen anything more revolting than an egg yolk breaking and spilling its yellow liquid? Huh?

[Bob]

It's a white, round thing without any holes. Where will I stick my.

[Tom Griswold]

Odd guy?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, he was a bizarre man.

[Tom Griswold]

There's a great story about him and Peter Wolf's the Jay Gyles band singer. Peter Wolf is a book that's a great Alfred Hitchcock. All right.

[Chick McGee]

Try to find that book.

[Tom Griswold]

It's out there right now. I know Josh easily. Josh. Most. Most of the books at your house you've already colored in. So you know what?

[Bob]

Hitchcock coloring books are good for stress.

[Tom Griswold]

I. I don't doubt that. You know what Alfred Hitchcock's nickname was?

[Bob]

Hitch.

[Tom Griswold]

Good. Correct.

[Bob]

It wasn't Cock. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

They went with the first part, right?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Good thing.

[Bob]

Really?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Bob]

Who's directing that cock? No, it's Hitch. Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, here we go. Happy birthday, Fidel Castro. Very popular with. Very popular with uninformed gen zers that think it's hip to what? Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah. They got Che Guevara and Fidel Castro T shirts.

[Bob]

He's seen one or two T shirts.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, the J things everywhere.

[Chick McGee]

Right, right.

[Tom Griswold]

But that's. Isn't that image owned by some major corporation?

[Chick McGee]

Nike.

[Tom Griswold]

You ever see that dust Broadway show, Fidel on the Roof?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, boy. Didn't last long.

[Tom Griswold]

If I stole your money.

[Chick McGee]

If you are a rich man.

[Bob]

Men.

[Chick McGee]

I would take more than half.

[Tom Griswold]

I would take it all. And that's pretty much today in history. You're welcome. Sexy time on the way. This is. These are. I should say, the Aeli Auto part Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Ace Cosby]

Got a comment to share? Text us at 888-262-8661. This is the Bob and Tom show.

[Christy Lee]

Or go blind. Quite a choice.

[Bob]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. At the Stylac Insurance news desk, it's Christy Lee.

[Christy Lee]

Hi.

[Bob]

There's Jessica Alsman.

[Jessica Alsman]

Hi.

[Bob]

Hello. Jeff Oskay.

[Jeff Oskay]

Hey, man.

[Bob]

Hello, Josh Arnold.

[Chick McGee]

Hi there.

[Bob]

There's Ace Cosby. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, you have a decree.

[Bob]

I have a decree. And now here's Thomas of Griswold.

[Tom Griswold]

We never get enough credit for the fact that we are all so sleep.

[Bob]

Deprived, we're about half nuts.

[Tom Griswold]

Getting anything out. That's what I just. Coherent manner is difficult.

[Christy Lee]

What'd you just have?

[Chick McGee]

A blueberry Oreo.

[Christy Lee]

And how was it?

[Bob]

Thumbs up.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, it sounds good.

[Chick McGee]

I'll have about nine more.

[Christy Lee]

So is It. The Golden Oreo with the blueberry in it.

[Chick McGee]

Exactly.

[Tom Griswold]

Blueberry Oreos.

[Bob]

And there's apple pie Oreo back there.

[Chick McGee]

I'll try that next.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, well, this sounds.

[Bob]

And there's a Jiffy Pop in the house. That what? The classic Jiffy Pop, where you put it on the stove and it.

[Tom Griswold]

Do we have a stove here?

[Bob]

Yeah, in the back.

[Tom Griswold]

There's a stove in the back.

[Christy Lee]

We have an electric plate. Oh, yeah, we have a hot plate. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I love Jiffy Bob.

[Bob]

I know you do.

[Tom Griswold]

We were talking about Alfred Hitchcock, the great film director, because he was born on this date many, many years ago, like 1899. And I was trying to figure out he was famous for doing cameos in his movies. And so I was trying to figure out how many he did, and I. I can't get a solid number.

[Bob]

All of them.

[Tom Griswold]

No, it's. It's between. Is he the 30 or 40 or 41 out of some 52 movies.

[Bob]

You remember Lifeboat?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Lifeboat is the famous one. Because the guy. They're all. The whole movie takes place on a raft or whatever. And a lifeboat. Someone holds up a. But I mean, they're at sea. Someone. Someone holds up.

[Bob]

Not called the raft.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, whatever. I'm trying to let people visualize what this is. It's at sea. You see?

[Bob]

I see.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Bob]

And there is a sea in the lifeboat.

[Tom Griswold]

And he. The guy has.

[Bob]

He's a real.

[Tom Griswold]

A newspaper that has an ad for a before and after weight loss clinic. And they're both Alfred Hitchcock.

[Jessica Alsman]

Oh, that's funny because.

[Tom Griswold]

But in most of his movies, he'd walk by a bus or something, but he would apparently, after a while, put them early in the movies because people would spend so much time waiting to see him. They. They would not pay attention to the actual film.

[Jessica Alsman]

Like him just walking by. Like walking his dog or any little thing.

[Tom Griswold]

Just a little obscure Alfred Hitchcock trivia. Perhaps boring for some, but for those of us that are c. You're a cinephile.

[Chick McGee]

I'm a cinephile. And that was.

[Tom Griswold]

How does it differ being a sinist.

[Chick McGee]

A cineist, please.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, is it cineus?

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

What does that mean?

[Chick McGee]

It means that you are just below a cinephile.

[Tom Griswold]

Means you're an ass that likes movies.

[Chick McGee]

Exactly.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, good. Oh, God. We gladly, gladly sorted that out. I apologize. Apologize again. Sleep deprived for me today.

[Chick McGee]

So it's a cinephile is somebody who only likes kids movies.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm let that sit there.

[Bob]

You know, they call those pedophiles in England not Pedophiles.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, they go pedo.

[Bob]

Pedo. Tom, your thoughts?

[Tom Griswold]

Isn't that a log for how far you've walked?

[Bob]

I'm chick wiggy. Have you ever brought us conversation to a halt like that?

[Chick McGee]

We'll try these words.

[Christy Lee]

Chinese words.

[Tom Griswold]

Wouldn't the pedophile be the. The actual number of steps you've taken if you look over the past. Over the past 30 days.

[Chick McGee]

Give me the pedo file and you can see how many steps I've got.

[Bob]

I believe that's a pedo meter.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. You know something? I. We need to move on.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, we don't change the subject. We're going to go to fishing.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. We have. We have Christy Lee at the Silac insurance news desk. Tell me more, Christy.

[Christy Lee]

Magnolia Lake in Bucks County, Pennsylvania. Usually a quiet spot for fishing and kayaking and such.

[Bob]

Well, not yesterday.

[Christy Lee]

That's right, Chick. They're an unusual visitor. Foot long alligator. Whoa. North Philadelphia angler Ricky Sanchez was fishing from his kayak when he hooked what he thought was a fish.

[Bob]

Here he comes.

[Chick McGee]

Ricky Sanchez.

[Christy Lee]

Until he saw the reptile thrashing near the surface. His video posted by township police quickly drew attention. Florida wildlife expert and Bucks county native Kyle Asplood happened to be visiting the area and offered to have help using a spotlight after dark.

[Tom Griswold]

Ass plunge.

[Christy Lee]

No, it's not. It's aspl.

[Tom Griswold]

What night is as plunge Mondays.

[Bob]

Just like always during halftime Monday night football game.

[Tom Griswold]

So this guy's got a four foot alligator in his canoe?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Apparently he lost it because then they had to go out and find it in the dark using a spotlight.

[Chick McGee]

You and me going fishing in the dark.

[Christy Lee]

They located and safely captured the alligator.

[Bob]

One of us is coming back.

[Christy Lee]

Of course this is the same old story. It probably started as a song and dance before being released into the wild. It has now been transferred to Asplen's sanctuary in Florida where it will remain four foot alligators.

[Bob]

Nothing.

[Christy Lee]

I know, right?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh yes, it's something.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, you can easily. Easily.

[Tom Griswold]

Probably about skinny thing you can easily lop off.

[Bob]

I could run some four foot alligator. What's the biggest alligator you think you could beat up?

[Tom Griswold]

00. I don't want to get anyone near him.

[Bob]

So if you walk across alligator eggs and you see a little baby alligator, that thing's going to biting you, right?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I'm a terrified of alligators. I'm a terrify like lizards.

[Christy Lee]

If you pick up a baby alligator, make sure you pick him up and hold his face away.

[Tom Griswold]

Not going to pick up a baby.

[Bob]

And you're not allowed to be in your baby alligators. You're a pedal.

[Tom Griswold]

That. That almost makes sense if you're just. If you're just joining us. So you have my sincere apology.

[Christy Lee]

Obviously the alligator will not survive in the winter in Pennsylvania.

[Tom Griswold]

What is the most unusual thing. Thing you've pulled in because you fish a lot. So do you, Mr. Oscar. What have you pulled in anything unusual in your day?

[Chick McGee]

Nothing too crazy. Rocks, Snake? A glove? No, I have not caught a snake. My brother has.

[Tom Griswold]

Did he take it off turtle hook or do you just break the line?

[Chick McGee]

He did, he did and he is. He's really uncomfortable with snakes. But he did get it. The snake kept rehooking itself as it was because, you know, it was getting wrapped up and. But he eventually got a free. I got the turtle free real easily and that was good. Yeah, dude.

[Jeff Oskay]

If I caught an alligator, that thing would have a new fishing bowl because I'm throwing it like I'm not unhooking it. Nothing.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm sure some of our listeners would have a new pair of boots.

[Jeff Oskay]

I almost caught a bird the other day. Casting. I was casting a flu and it went right under my hook as I.

[Chick McGee]

Sometimes birds will swoop down for them and stuff. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Really?

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah. I didn't want to catch a bird.

[Chick McGee]

No. That'd be awful.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, cuz what they'll. If they like the bait, the bait's floating, they'll come grab it and.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, I guess.

[Christy Lee]

When you're bank fishing like that, do you have a net with you or.

[Chick McGee]

I don't keep a net with me.

[Christy Lee]

No, I didn't know.

[Tom Griswold]

It's kind of like the kid who goes to a baseball game and brings a glove love. In fact, they're kind of overconfident. Yeah.

[Bob]

You have a bat, right? You hit him on the head when you get them up on shore.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. You gotta club every fish. You want them still.

[Bob]

It's humane. Yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Speaking of it, remember the guys would take those fishing nets to baseball games?

[Bob]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I think they finally disallowed that.

[Chick McGee]

Every boat though I'm on, I'll have. There's a net.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

But you can just kind of reach down.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, I'm not catching anything big enough. I need a net that a real.

[Jessica Alsman]

Man will use his hands, right?

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, exactly.

[Tom Griswold]

See, Well, I don't care for a real man.

[Chick McGee]

Real man will also cry when they lose a six pounder because they didn't have a net.

[Bob]

Tom, do you ever. Do you ever bait a hook? I don't see you baiting a hook?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, sure. I used to fish all the time.

[Bob]

No kidding.

[Chick McGee]

Would you be bummed out now, though, trying to put a worm on a hook or.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, no.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, okay. You're all right.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I've been. I've been. I've been fishing in not too long.

[Bob]

I see you.

[Tom Griswold]

I used to fish. I used to fish all the time.

[Bob]

I see you in a quiet way. You make your own flies?

[Tom Griswold]

No, I. I don't have that kind of time, but I know people. I know people that do. Certainly.

[Chick McGee]

I fished a lot, too. I still kind of don't like putting a worm on a hook. It's unpleasant.

[Bob]

Right.

[Christy Lee]

What about shrimp? You ever have to do those, too? The live shrimp when you're down in Florida?

[Bob]

Please relax.

[Jeff Oskay]

We use frozen shrimp up at the lake.

[Christy Lee]

Do you really?

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, it's way easier. They fight way less.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Bob]

Relax, Mr. Worm, while I disembowel you.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, stick him through. Then you stick them through again.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, no, it's easy. It's just not a pleasure, you know, it's gross.

[Bob]

Yeah, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

But I do. It's fine.

[Tom Griswold]

You draw the line at small mammals.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, yeah. I don't do anything that like budding psychopaths.

[Bob]

Aren't there guys who catch?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, well, that was a story. Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

So hopefully Josh has a lure that is a rat.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

Have you caught anything with the rat?

[Chick McGee]

No, but I.

[Tom Griswold]

It looks like a dead rat.

[Chick McGee]

No, no, it looks like a swimming rat. I mean, it looks just like a real rat that's swimming. What do you.

[Tom Griswold]

What do you. What are you fishing for?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, largemouth bass. Go for that. Yeah.

[Bob]

No kidding.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, yeah. I've had. I've had them go for it. They've not hooked.

[Tom Griswold]

How big are the fish?

[Chick McGee]

How big's the. The fish I'm catching?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Typically three pounders.

[Tom Griswold]

And it can eat. It can eat a swimming rat?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, sure. Yeah, yeah.

[Bob]

You know those jaws, they unhinge.

[Chick McGee]

Largemouth.

[Bob]

Yeah, it's large mouth.

[Chick McGee]

And frogs. I frog, you know, plenty of frogs. Those are great.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, we have more fish in the news. In this case, it's going to be sharks.

[Bob]

Ever fish with dynamite? Oh, never mind.

[Chick McGee]

In a pinch, Raycon.

[Bob]

You know what you need while you're fishing out there there enjoying your music on your Raycon Classic Everyday Earbuds. That right. This message sponsored by Raycon and the latest version of Raycon's Everyday Earbuds Classic. Now they're back and they feature active noise cancellation. The one thing they were missing. Pair that with 8 hours of playtime, 32 hour battery. Your Raycons will never leave your ears. Their audio quality rivals all the big audio brands you know and love of at half the price and icon has returned. Get yours today with free shipping on every pair of Raycon earbuds. Go to buyraycon.com tom to get 20% off the fan favorite everyday earbuds classic. Right Now Raycon offering 20% off their Everyday Earbuds Classic. That's buyraycon.com Tom.

[Chick McGee]

Tom the Rat. Also, it's not a New York City sub boy rat. It's. It looks more like a mouse.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, okay.

[Bob]

Size wise?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, they just, they're just called rats.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Okay, good, good to know. Thank you very much. Coming up, I'm very excited. We're going to be talking about romance and love and helping you with your love life. It's Sexy Time with Ali Breen here from the O'Reilly Auto Part Studios, this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Bob]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. Jeff Osuke. There's Christy Lee, Jessica Alsman, Josh Arnold. I got the blues Lord, I'm down. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts studios. Think O'Reilly Auto Parts for all your car care needs. Get the parts and service you need fast from the professional parts people at O'Reilly Auto Parts. Hello, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello, Chick Mc McGee. And hello to Allie Breen. Oh, she's somewhere. Are you in your bathroom?

[Ali Breen]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

Is that a shower curtain behind you?

[Ali Breen]

No, it's like a curtain curtain. I'm at Mohican Sun. I just had a show last night and it's so hot in New York, I think I'm staying here for the afternoon.

[Tom Griswold]

Ah. Oh, well, great comedian Allie Breen has joined us. She is our hostess for a segment we call Sexy Time. And is that a bathing suit you've got on?

[Ali Breen]

No, the summertime.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, okay.

[Christy Lee]

Exactly.

[Ali Breen]

It's a summer top.

[Bob]

Creepy, man.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you happen to watch ABC News last night? Ginger Z in a bathing suit.

[Christy Lee]

You have a crush on her.

[Tom Griswold]

Ginger Z.

[Chick McGee]

She's a knockout.

[Bob]

He's been talking about Ginger Z for a year.

[Tom Griswold]

Michigan.

[Christy Lee]

Why was she in a bathing suit on the news?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, she was in a bathing suit. My mind, I really couldn't.

[Ali Breen]

It's so hot. Everyone should be in a bathing suit. Are you guys having a heat wave there too?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, it's a little warm, a little toasty. Now the way name. The name of the show, I should say is Sexy Time. And what we do is we try to help people with Their love problems. And you have collected a number of letters today. Let's get to our first one.

[Ali Breen]

Dear Ally, My husband and I are trying to start a family. He told his mom. And now she's been giving me all kinds of advice. Like the most effective sex positions, what time of day to have sex, what foods I should be eating, and more. It's really creeping me out. Is this normal? My husband thinks it's cute.

[Chick McGee]

I do too.

[Tom Griswold]

No, it's not cute.

[Chick McGee]

Grow up. You're two adult women talking about this.

[Tom Griswold]

No, but you don't want to envision. Well, your mom said after we're done banging, I'm supposed to stand on my head and say the Lord's prayer. No, see, that's the problem with today's. Today's world. I blame the Internet. Boundaries.

[Chick McGee]

No, this is.

[Tom Griswold]

We need boundaries. Like the way I have a boundary between you guys. Like, I have. I have a shield of lies.

[Christy Lee]

Well aware.

[Chick McGee]

No, you guys, you're two adults. Get over it.

[Jessica Alsman]

She's saying is baloney. Just do it when you're ovulating.

[Bob]

Unless. Unless the mom says, hey, you have sex with him.

[Tom Griswold]

Like, I don't.

[Bob]

That's what he wants.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, pretty soon you'll have touched it more than I did when I was changing his diapers.

[Bob]

No, that's.

[Tom Griswold]

It's incredibly creepy. No, it's not.

[Chick McGee]

Only you are turning it into something sick. She's. She isn't.

[Bob]

You do that a lot.

[Tom Griswold]

Her mother in law is suggesting sexual positions. That is.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Uncomfortable.

[Tom Griswold]

That's weird.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Get over it.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow. Hey, look at that. That pepper shaker reminds me of Bill's Johnson.

[Jeff Oskay]

Pass the pepper.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, do you shake it like this before you.

[Chick McGee]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

It's awful again.

[Chick McGee]

Everything you're doing is. Is adding awful to it. She's not being awful.

[Tom Griswold]

That's my. That's my specialty. Ch. I don't notice that. That's how the show works.

[Chick McGee]

I appreciate that.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know. I think it's wrong. I don't know. How do you. How do you undo it, though?

[Bob]

How do you feel about a girl or a guy either yelling mommy or daddy?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, that's not funny.

[Tom Griswold]

Me.

[Bob]

Yeah, I don't care for that either.

[Tom Griswold]

Leave them out of it.

[Chick McGee]

I'm out. I don't. I don't care for it at all.

[Bob]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, you're my daddy.

[Tom Griswold]

What?

[Chick McGee]

Do I have to put you on my phone plan now?

[Tom Griswold]

What the hell's going on? So I guess in the original letter was the question, how do I get this to stop. Is that.

[Ali Breen]

Yeah, pretty much. Because she thinks it's creepy. He thinks it's cute. She says, is it normal she wants it to stop.

[Chick McGee]

I bet it is normal for mothers in law to sort of insert themselves.

[Tom Griswold]

It's one thing to be recommending sort of technical things or vitamins or something.

[Christy Lee]

You can drink or. But not sexual positions.

[Bob]

Your mother in law installed cable. What are you talking about? With technical things?

[Tom Griswold]

I like Alsman was saying I don't install cable anymore. WI fi, ovulating and that sort of thing. But still the whole thing is a.

[Jessica Alsman]

Little bit like, why isn't she giving the advice to just her son?

[Tom Griswold]

I guess that's just as creepy.

[Jessica Alsman]

Exactly. And then he can tell her to stop because he won't want to deal with it.

[Chick McGee]

That's creepier.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah.

[Ali Breen]

Solution.

[Tom Griswold]

She should say, well, son, from say.

[Ali Breen]

Tell it to him.

[Tom Griswold]

When you were staying at the house, like we weakened from the cries I was hearing. You're going to have to turn her over.

[Chick McGee]

So it's less creepy if it.

[Bob]

Lands on her back.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, for a mother to talk to her. Her blood son. It's still creepy about sexual positions than it is for a mother to talk to her daughter.

[Tom Griswold]

No, they're both. They're both creepy.

[Chick McGee]

They are not equally creepy at all.

[Jessica Alsman]

The sun will put an end to it though, real quick.

[Ali Breen]

Yes, that's the point. The son will be like, this is creepy. I don't want to hear this.

[Bob]

Josh.

[Tom Griswold]

The distinction you're making is like, well, if I jump out of a helicopter into the ocean from 500ft or I jump into a parking lot, which hurts more. You're missing the point. You're still jumping out of the helicopter.

[Chick McGee]

Because the point is invalid. This lady needs to grow up.

[Bob]

Exactly.

[Chick McGee]

You're not. You are not mature enough to have kids is what I'm gonna say. What if she took that advice off?

[Tom Griswold]

Does your father. Does your father in law. I'm sorry, does the father in law want to be there for the birthing?

[Bob]

By the way?

[Ali Breen]

The mother in law does for sure.

[Tom Griswold]

It looks like junior's crying, drowning.

[Ali Breen]

We should start a betting pool on which letter is going to make Josh the angriest.

[Tom Griswold]

By the way, is anybody watching the pit?

[Chick McGee]

Yes, yes, we're all watching the effing pit.

[Bob]

Stop asking us.

[Chick McGee]

In fact, most of us have watched it all the way through.

[Bob]

Yes, it's been on for a year.

[Tom Griswold]

Wouldn't you? But the, the birthing segment is rather graphic.

[Christy Lee]

Seven times.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, the kid's head's sticking Out. All of a sudden, he starts singing. Hello.

[Chick McGee]

That was an odd choice.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Did you not see your children being born?

[Tom Griswold]

I don't want to see it again. I can't. I like them. I like them when they're all out. Okay. Our guest is comedian Ali Breen. You can find her a L L I B R E E N on your favorite social media platform or on Only Fans at Ali B. And you can write her with your love troubles. And as you can see, we're really good at fixing them. What's next, Ally?

[Ali Breen]

Dear Allie, my boyfriend asked me to go to a destination wedding with him in the Bahamas. I said yes, got excited, figured he'd be paying, but he just sent me all of his flight and hotel information, telling me to coordinate and giving me the prices.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no. Wrong.

[Ali Breen]

It's clear I'm responsible for my half. We've been dating four and a half months, so I won't really know anyone at the wedding. Seems like it could be fun, but now I'm really mad at him. I'm only going if he pays for me. Do I tell him this or do.

[Bob]

We just break up?

[Ali Breen]

What do I do?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, you just tell him that.

[Chick McGee]

Or just break.

[Bob]

Or just break up.

[Tom Griswold]

She must really like the guy. No, break up if it's even in the plan.

[Jessica Alsman]

He was vetting you out to make sure you were cool enough to even invite. Probably, but just be like, I can't afford to go, but I'd love to, so if you want to help me out, that'd be great.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. I don't know. Do any of us think that he should be making her pay at all?

[Christy Lee]

No, I. Good. He invited her.

[Chick McGee]

Yes, exactly.

[Bob]

However, if he pays, she better be putting out.

[Chick McGee]

That is a contract, okay? Yeah.

[Bob]

It's a legal, binding contract. And when you're telling her about it, you need to hit your hands when you're telling her stuff.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Why would this guy.

[Bob]

This is a contract.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. No.

[Tom Griswold]

Destination weddings are awful anyway.

[Jeff Oskay]

H. Infuriating.

[Chick McGee]

It could have been fun for a new couple to go to the Bahamas, though.

[Jessica Alsman]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Have some drinks, meet some. Some of his friends. But he ruined it.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Ali Breen]

His only save would be if he's like, oh, I was just showing you. And I was going to reimburse you all of the money, but I didn't, you know, the hassle of getting all your information.

[Chick McGee]

Right. Even that's. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, he wants her to pay, Clearly.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. But he's. I just don't think that's proper.

[Bob]

He's cheap as the day is long. Okay.

[Christy Lee]

Or he should have phrased it differently.

[Bob]

Runs screaming from him.

[Tom Griswold]

We are in the O'Reilly Auto Part Studios here in the Bob and Tom program talking with comedian Ally Breen. The segment is known as Sexy Time. What do you got, Ally?

[Ali Breen]

Dear Ally, one of my best friends got pregnant and she won't reveal who the father is. It's causing some problems in our friend group because some people are thinking the reason she won't tell us is that it might be one of her husbands.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Bob]

I don't know what I think this is on Netflix. I hope this is on Netflix. I want to watch, I want to.

[Christy Lee]

Hear, I want to make sure I heard this correctly.

[Tom Griswold]

The friend is pregnant, won't say who the. Won't say who the father is.

[Christy Lee]

The other ladies think it could be one of their husbands.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Ali Breen]

And that's why she won't tell.

[Jessica Alsman]

This is awesome.

[Ali Breen]

Then she goes on to say I thought I said maybe she went to a clinic and they said she would have told us about it if she was going to take that route. So something weird is going to on. What do you guys think?

[Chick McGee]

I think women should not be allowed in groups anymore.

[Christy Lee]

You just, you just feed what you're not.

[Chick McGee]

You just feed into your.

[Bob]

Anything more than two and it has to be reviewed.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Bob]

By a judge and be okay.

[Chick McGee]

When you get together somebody.

[Tom Griswold]

This may be all hell breaks. This may be happening because of all those shows like. Like this.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Ali Breen]

Literally.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Jessica Alsman]

She made it.

[Ali Breen]

I just love that they're all side eyeing each other's husbands.

[Bob]

Well, look, we all know how awful men are and this could happen. Absolutely.

[Tom Griswold]

No, but Aussie is right. She may not know. Yeah.

[Jessica Alsman]

She could have had back to back nights and she. I don't know who it was. So how can I tell you?

[Tom Griswold]

Aren't there cases where a woman had twins and one's from one guy and one another?

[Christy Lee]

Oh yeah.

[Chick McGee]

That's amazing.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, that's crazy good time is what that is.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, they've had twins that are black and white.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I love that.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Bob]

Like the cookie.

[Tom Griswold]

At Ivory in the maternity ward.

[Bob]

Look to the cookie.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow. Well, that's interesting.

[Chick McGee]

What do you think, Ally?

[Bob]

Yeah. You're so smart.

[Ali Breen]

What do I think? Oh yeah. I think Jess is right. I think she probably doesn't know. She doesn't want to say, hey, I've been with a bunch of guys who are potentially the dad. But wouldn't you think she would tell someone who's potentially the dad isn't it gonna come out that way.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I think.

[Chick McGee]

I don't blame her for not telling these loony chicks.

[Tom Griswold]

I think there should be a big reveal. Like they bring a cake and they cut it like a gender party, except it'll be who the dad is.

[Jessica Alsman]

Gang banger.

[Ali Breen]

That would be a good Netflix show.

[Tom Griswold]

Look, Susie, it's your husband.

[Ali Breen]

All the husbands.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. The thing that I find amazing is that they still call her a friend if they think she's screwing their husbands.

[Tom Griswold]

Right.

[Bob]

But you know what's going to happen? Whoever's husband it is, the remaining ones are going to talk about her. And that's why they're all excited about it.

[Chick McGee]

It's none of their husbands. They're all bat crap.

[Jessica Alsman]

No. After this baby comes out, we know what it looks like. If it has red hair, crazy freckles.

[Chick McGee]

They just stand the fact that she's keeping something to herself.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

I hate.

[Jeff Oskay]

I hate.

[Bob]

We have to know.

[Tom Griswold]

I think it'd be really fun to have us. My reveal party. Now, I think about this. All the husbands are there. Which ones? Which one's getting the most drunk?

[Bob]

There's one guy sweating and smoking.

[Chick McGee]

Conception.

[Tom Griswold]

Jerry Springer type DNA test reveal.

[Bob]

She got hit by lightning.

[Jessica Alsman]

That's a great idea, Tom. Each one of these friends can go home to their husbands and say, well, we found out who the dad is.

[Tom Griswold]

Is.

[Jessica Alsman]

And just see their reaction.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, jeez.

[Jessica Alsman]

Yeah, try it.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, it's just.

[Bob]

It's turned into a war zone. Holy hell.

[Ali Breen]

Or after the child's born, each person can pull a hair and get the test done themselves.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, there was that.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, let's move on. Ali Breen is our guest. The show is sexy time. We've really done a lot of good work today.

[Ali Breen]

Oh, we're killing it. Dear Allie. Okay, this is a. We have to interpret this because I had a friend with. I had a friends with benefit situation who was really into Beaches because I don't know what you can say on air. Do you know what I'm talking about?

[Christy Lee]

Beaches.

[Tom Griswold]

Is this from a man or a woman?

[Ali Breen]

It's a woman.

[Bob]

So she likes three ways. Is that right? What Beaches bitches.

[Chick McGee]

She wants to do with Bette Midler and Barbara Hershey.

[Ali Breen]

DJ is.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. All right.

[Bob]

No, no, no, no. You mean blow. Blowies.

[Christy Lee]

Blowies.

[Ali Breen]

There we go. Should I replace it with that? I had a crush on him, so I would do that for him sometimes. But since then, I've gotten into a relationship that's now ended, but my crush on him also ended as well.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Ali Breen]

He wants to resume our situation. And since I'm not that into it, I said, what do I get out of this?

[Bob]

There you go.

[Ali Breen]

So he said, well, where do you want to go to dinner? I'll take you out. I picked a place. We went. I gave him his beach. We kept on doing that tit for tat for a while. Like, I need new sunglasses. Beach, I want a shirt. Now he has a girlfriend, but we're still in this situation. I told him he's cheating on his girlfriend, and he says he's not. And now we're fighting as if we're in an actual relationship.

[Bob]

I know what the problem is. I told him.

[Ali Breen]

He's acting like I'm less than human.

[Bob]

Oh, he's stupid. He's very, very stupid.

[Tom Griswold]

First of all. Well, let's. You've gone pro. Let's be honest here. Yeah, pretty much you've gone pro. And it's only a matter of time before you're just doing it for cash. And just. Just Venmo me. This is where I wish it was. The, like, the an Landers thing, where she'd write back, you know, dear.

[Bob]

And walla walla.

[Chick McGee]

How does she finish the letter?

[Ali Breen]

Just bottom word. She said, we're actually in a fight, and I'm telling him we're not going to do it anymore. He wants to continue, but I have to admit, this is all turning me on now. And I'd miss the dinners and free stuff. Should I just keep doing it?

[Tom Griswold]

Maybe just up. I'll be alone. You're up the ante. Charge more. Double.

[Jessica Alsman]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Ali Breen]

Now they have a girlfriend.

[Tom Griswold]

I need more.

[Jeff Oskay]

Give me a Birkin bag.

[Tom Griswold]

Wait a second.

[Chick McGee]

It's not insane. You could just keep going until you price yourself out.

[Tom Griswold]

But wait a second. Wait a second. If you're keeping a. We're missing the whole thing. I can't believe we never thought about this. Are you familiar with blackmail? Oh, yeah. Yeah. Start keeping some really solid records here, and then down the road.

[Christy Lee]

You want your girlfriend to find out.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. What's an expensive purse, Christy?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, well, Birkin is. What?

[Bob]

You change a Birkin.

[Tom Griswold]

That's a thing. Okay. Is it like the shoes? Birkenstock?

[Bob]

No, no.

[Christy Lee]

It's an Hermes bag.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Okay. Okay. Hermes. Okay.

[Ali Breen]

Yeah, that's it.

[Bob]

Keep up in the Annie until you're not close.

[Ali Breen]

Too expensive, I guess.

[Tom Griswold]

Not Hermes. No. Okay. I think we can squeeze in one more letter. I'm enjoying this so much. Ally. What do you got here?

[Ali Breen]

Ally, I have a really hot girlfriend. And for the most Part we get along great, but when we fight, she goes really for the jugular. She starts saying, look at me and look at you. And basically telling me I should be grateful to be with her.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh my God.

[Bob]

Let me tell you something. I've been there.

[Tom Griswold]

Get out. Get out now.

[Bob]

That.

[Tom Griswold]

That's good. That's the way she actually thinks.

[Bob]

You just have to weather the storm, sir.

[Tom Griswold]

Get out.

[Ali Breen]

Tom. Nailed it. Because she said she's probably right to a degree. But it makes me wonder what she's thinking of me when we're not fighting. Last time we fought, I said, fine, go find someone better. If that's the case. And she told me she's just too lazy. Still mean, right? Would you guys stay or leave?

[Jessica Alsman]

Nothing like being settled for.

[Chick McGee]

What a. What a combo. Mean and lazy.

[Jeff Oskay]

But she's hot.

[Chick McGee]

Apparently she's a nine or something.

[Bob]

So hot. So, so hot.

[Tom Griswold]

So hot.

[Jessica Alsman]

Get some beaches first.

[Bob]

I think.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, you deserve better. It sounds to me like. Yeah, you deserve better, man.

[Jeff Oskay]

Don't put up with that.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

How much do you settle for just because she's good looking?

[Bob]

Unless she's.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, man. I have a ex wife I pay money to just for that reason. Horrible person, but she was.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, thank you, Allie. Are you working this week?

[Ali Breen]

Yes. Yeah, I'll be back in the city. I'm going to be at the Comedy Village on Saturday and Sunday and Monday I will be at Gotham.

[Tom Griswold]

All right.

[Chick McGee]

Awesome.

[Tom Griswold]

You can once again you could reach Ali Breen. A L L I B R E E N on your favorite social media platform. Nice job, Ali. Always a great pleasure. Thanks, guys.

[Chick McGee]

Yes, thank you, Ali.

[Tom Griswold]

Don't get too sunburned. Okay. You.

[Christy Lee]

Bye. Ally boy, we did good work today.

[Jessica Alsman]

Interesting.

[Bob]

Is that a bathing suit you're wearing? Can you. Can you mail it to me?

[Tom Griswold]

Just the bottoms. Okay.

[Bob]

Good Lord, man.

[Tom Griswold]

Let's see, where was I? Oh. Coming up, we have. I think we have time for some more shark news.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Am I right about that?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. You want to do it when come back.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

I heard shark news also.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah. Okay.

[Chick McGee]

I bet the Venn diagram of shark attacks and sharding.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Often just one circle.

[Tom Griswold]

Often one does the other and then. Okay, very good. All right. Now this portion of the Bob and Tom show. It's brought to you by over there the place Christie, is the Silac Insurance news desk. You've been hearing about Silac annuities for a while. We've decided to turn this into a little bit of a quiz for you. I call it the McGee 3. Three questions from the SILAC Frequently Asked Questions Desk. Question number one. Dear Chick Magee, I want to browse and read about all the Silac annuity choices. What is the Silac address for the Silac website?

[Bob]

That's easy, Tom. It's silacins.com that's S I L A C I N S dot com.

[Tom Griswold]

Something special happening right now. And this is question two. I love this idea. A 20% bonus by going from a 401k to a Silac annuity. What is the phone number? To find out information about that, even.

[Bob]

Easier, just dial £250 on your cell and say bonus 20. That number again, £250. And then just say bonus 20.

[Tom Griswold]

Very good, very good. We're learning a lot here. Last question, Mr. McGee. Would it be too much to ask if you could also read this Sil Slack insurance disclaimer right there?

[Bob]

Far too much to ask. Here's Christy.

[Christy Lee]

Premium bonus may vary by annuity product, premium band and surrender charge period selected and may be subject to a premium bonus recapture. Some products with bonuses may offer lower growth rates or caps. Consult your financial advisor. Terms and conditions apply. See silacins.com disclosures.

[Tom Griswold]

What a pro.

[Christy Lee]

Thank you.

[Tom Griswold]

That is really nice, Christy. I could never have gotten through that without, I don't know, telling a couple jokes or attempting to. Thank you very much. Once again, we are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Ace Cosby]

This portion of the Bob and Tom show, brought to you by Java House, the official coffee and refreshments of the Bob and Tom show win coffee for your office for a year. Visit bobandtom.com to find out how.

[Bob]

Welcome back to the Bob and Top show at the SILAC Insurance news desk, it's Christy Lee.

[Christy Lee]

Hello.

[Bob]

There's Jessica Alsman.

[Christy Lee]

Hey.

[Bob]

Hello, Jeff. Oscar.

[Chick McGee]

Yep.

[Bob]

Josh Arnold.

[Chick McGee]

Hi there.

[Bob]

Ace Cosby. I'm Chick. Hello, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello. Chick McGee.

[Bob]

Hello.

[Tom Griswold]

Sorry. We have enough time to check in with a couple more stories. We do have another fishing store story because we have two fishermen in the studio, Mr. Oscar and Josh. Josh. Both pretty much avid fishermen. You guys fish a lot?

[Jeff Oskay]

Josh is more of a pro. Oh, gosh.

[Chick McGee]

But. But yeah, we enjoy. We do enjoy it.

[Tom Griswold]

I always get a kick out of it. I'll be riding my bike and I'll look over. There's a couple of bridges I have to cross, and I'll see guys down there early on a Saturday morning fishing nice in their waiters. It always makes me happy. Yeah.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Why don't you do that instead of ride a bike?

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah. Why don't you come fishing with me?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. It's quieter. It's relaxing.

[Tom Griswold]

We'll see.

[Jeff Oskay]

We can get no out there to record the whole thing.

[Tom Griswold]

I used to fish all the time. I'm. I'm pretty.

[Chick McGee]

Welcome to go with us whenever you like.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Chick McGee]

Maybe you bring the girls. I've got poles for them.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, that'd be. Oh, they'd love that.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

But in the meantime, we have another fish story in the news.

[Christy Lee]

Yes. And Mike, Mark, our assistant, is going to Maine soon on vacation next week. He might want to look out. There's a great white shark. One of the state's most popular beaches. Scarborough's marine resource officer got word of a roughly 10 to 12 foot shark earlier this week.

[Chick McGee]

I went to a fair there.

[Christy Lee]

Scarborough?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Are you going to Scarborough?

[Bob]

They have parsley, that sage, rosemary.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't have the time.

[Christy Lee]

Shark was spotted in the area of Crescent Beach State Park Park, Higgins beach and Pine Point Beach. Police Department in Scarborough said they are circulating drone footage of the shark for public situational awareness. Fatal shark bites are rare. The first recorded fatal shark attack in Maine happened in the summer of 2020.

[Bob]

Finally broken through to our little Tommy. He's scared of sharks now. I will not go to a beach ever again.

[Chick McGee]

Sometimes Laughing Land is better.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean. Yeah, think about that. You got. You got Stephen King.

[Bob]

Just because you're going to Maine. He's not there at the border just waving everyone.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, he works at the visitor center.

[Christy Lee]

Shouldn't that be copy of car.

[Tom Griswold]

If. If Stephen King. If Stephen King had written Jaws. Oh, my God.

[Chick McGee]

He.

[Tom Griswold]

This shark is an agent for the devil.

[Chick McGee]

What if they buried. What have you buried a shark in a pet cemetery? Because the ground is sour, as you all know, of course. And boy, oh, boy.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, am I correct in saying Jaws is celebrating its 50th anniversary? And isn't it coming to theaters next week?

[Chick McGee]

Something. Something soon, sometime in August?

[Bob]

Haven't you two already argued about this?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but I. I've actually seen the movie in its entirety about three weeks, weeks ago when I was on vacation. Watched it again. It's such a good movie.

[Chick McGee]

It really is.

[Tom Griswold]

It's so well done. But it gets a little bit funky at the end there. That. There's one scene where the shark is like three quarters into the boat and.

[Bob]

You can almost hear the servers.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

You know, we've come a long way.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah. No, but it's still. It's still great. The scene where Roy Scheider's having dinner with his son.

[Chick McGee]

That's wonderful, isn't it?

[Tom Griswold]

That's so brilliant. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Lifeguards in Florida helped rescue a deer that was struggling in the ocean recently.

[Bob]

Oh, dear.

[Christy Lee]

WOFL reports the distress tv it's not our fault. Was seen flailing in the water off Flagler Beach. Senior lifeguard Chase Hunter and first year lifeguard Leo Peters.

[Bob]

I'm Chase Hunter.

[Christy Lee]

Braved strong waves. Impossible shark threats to rescue the animals. Animal. Once ashore, the lifeguards joined by Flagler beach fire rescue work together to get the deer across busy A1A and back toward the nearby woods.

[Bob]

Flagler fire.

[Tom Griswold]

That's got to be very tricky.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Because those.

[Chick McGee]

Flagler. I agree.

[Christy Lee]

Kicked by a deer. You're gonna remember it.

[Tom Griswold]

I've seen. I've seen a deep deer swimming and. Oh, it's.

[Jeff Oskay]

Tell me more.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, you bury the lead here. Can I have your autograph?

[Bob]

Hi, it's Chick McGee once again. You're hearing a new episode of a boar. Tom is the boar.

[Tom Griswold]

I was. I was water. I was water skiing at the time and I look over. Holy.

[Chick McGee]

How are we able to get you. I can't. You're not on 60 Minutes.

[Bob]

Oh, yeah. You must turn down interviews all the time.

[Tom Griswold]

I was.

[Chick McGee]

I have seen. I have seen a deer.

[Tom Griswold]

I have also tripped. I've also tripped on a dead deer.

[Bob]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

On the shores of.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, man.

[Tom Griswold]

Get you Michigan. Oh, it's so creepy. I didn't have a flashlight. What the.

[Bob]

I was telling my camp counselor the.

[Tom Griswold]

Deer obviously was in the ocean trying to avoid being hit by Godwin's car. This.

[Bob]

It's been a while.

[Tom Griswold]

Pat's do.

[Christy Lee]

Well, don't say that.

[Tom Griswold]

He hasn't been a deer in a year.

[Christy Lee]

Don't say that.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Bob]

That's all he needs right now. Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Christy Lee]

We'll put that out in the atmosphere.

[Bob]

We can't say where he is. Right.

[Tom Griswold]

It's my fault. Yeah, that's correct. Yeah. Thank you so much for joining us. We always appreciate it. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios and this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Ace Cosby]

Thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom show this morning. The show is also out there for you on our YouTube channel. Watch and subscribe. This is the Bob. Bob and Tom Show.

[Tom Griswold]

I am Michael Rosenbaum.

[Bob]

I am Tom Welling.

[Tom Griswold]

Welcome to Talk Bill.

[Bob]

Where it's fun to talk about Smallville.

[Tom Griswold]

We're going to be talking to sometimes guest stars.

[Bob]

Are you liking the direction Lois is going in?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, because I'm getting more screen time. It's good.

[Jeff Oskay]

But mostly it's just me and Tom remembering.

[Bob]

I think we all feel like there.

[Tom Griswold]

Was a scene missing here. You got me, Tom. Let's revisit it.

[Jeff Oskay]

Let's look at it, See what we remember.

[Tom Griswold]

See what we remember. I had never been around anything like that before.

[Bob]

I mean, it was so fun.

[Tom Griswold]

Talk Ville. Talk, Bill.

[Bob]

I just had a flashback.

[Jeff Oskay]

Follow and listen on your favorite platform.

[Tom Griswold]

Let's get into it.