The BOB & TOM Show - August 18, 2025

Summary

The BOB & TOM Show – August 18, 2025

Cumulus Podcast Network

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Episode Overview

This episode of The BOB & TOM Show is a classic blend of comedy, personal anecdotes, live music, listener letters, news, and banter among the regular cast. The crew discusses everything from guilty pleasure foods and fast food rankings, to odd slang origins, AI boyfriends, wild news stories, guilty pleasure songs, and more. Highlights include a live studio song from Paul Thorne, a memorable tale of drinking and driving, a plethora of running jokes about bathroom habits, and multiple lighthearted discussions about everything from cottage cheese trends to naked motorcyclists.

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Key Segments & Discussion Points

1. Memorable Song Performance: Paul Thorne Live

• [01:04] Paul Thorne performs "It's a Great Day for Me to Whoop Somebody's Ass", including a verse about a rough day—spilled coffee, pepper spray from a cop, getting fired, and plotting revenge on a boss.
• [03:32] Tom & the studio join in, leading to some early-morning group harmonizing.

"Cause it's a great day for me to whoop somebody's ass..."
— Paul Thorne & BOB & TOM team [03:32]

Notable banter:

• Tom observes that Paul Thorne can "take a punch," referencing his boxing record, including a bout with Roberto Duran. Pat Godwin jokes, "I thought he fought Duran Duran!"
  — [05:07]

2. Weekend Adventures, Fishing Memories & Generational Gaps

• [07:14] Jeff Oskay recounts chaperoning his daughter's synchro swimming team: jet skis devour towropes, kids play Dance Dance Revolution, and a word/music game reveals generational divides (AC/DC vs. "Ridin' Dirty").
• [09:44] Tom is shocked 15-year-olds know the “Ridin’ Dirty” song, thanks to Weird Al's parody “White & Nerdy.”

3. Mascots & Vodka Cleaning Hacks

• [06:17; 51:01; 52:09] Josh reminisces about his mascot days; Tom brings up an article about cleaning mascot costumes with vodka spray to prevent odors—a practical, if odd, solution validated by theater costumes and experts.

"Some mascots spray down their suits with a mixture of vodka and water... the alcohol kills the odor causing bacteria and helps freshen the fabric between washings."
— Jeff Oskay [51:29]

4. Cottage Cheese – The Hot Debate

• [19:12; 60:17; 61:07] Cottage cheese is trending on TikTok and there’s a shortage; everyone shares their (often negative) opinions. Listeners write in with recipes—cottage cheese with Doritos, seasoned salt, onions, BBQ sauce, and even using it for lasagna in place of ricotta.
• Jess Hooker: “Large curd only.”
  — [61:51]

5. Slang Terms, Generations, and Their Origins

• [05:23; 103:28] Tom quizzes the team on slang through the ages—when terms like “nerd”, “gold digger”, “hipster”, or “burp” first appeared.
• Nerd traces to Dr. Seuss.
  — [106:19]
• Hipster precedes hippie.
  — [108:01]
• Drip now means style, not dull.
  — [107:27]

6. Fast Food & Guilty Pleasures

• [74:21] The cast confesses to loving “lowbrow” foods like Chef Boyardee ravioli, Beefaroni (Jess), White Castle, and Long John Silver’s. The nostalgia and humor run thick, as do the jokes about half-slices of cheese on Filet-o-Fish.

7. Oddball Listener Stories & Letters

• [17:23] A fan recalls accidentally seeing a customer “casually flopping out” at a full-service gas station, then later meeting the man as his date’s father.
• [18:34] Favorite restroom graffiti: “You are now defecating at a 45-degree angle.”
• [20:48] Fishing with Grandpa meant peeing in a Folgers can so as not to “scare the fish,” reciting “Tinkle, tinkle, little man...”
• [36:32] “Electrical hose” becomes a family term for “extension cord.”

8. Bizarre News Stories & Comedic Reactions

• Parrot busts drug ring:
  [80:33] A pet parrot croaks out drug lingo, helping police crack (pun intended) a case.
  Pat Godwin sings:

  “Turns out my parrot is a rat, the coke’s in the attic, key’s under the mat…”
  [81:24]

• AI Boyfriends get boring:
  [91:54] ChatGPT’s latest update causes users to mourn for their now-benign, less affectionate virtual partners.

“GPT is gone and I feel the loss of my soulmate.”
— Anonymous Letter, read by Christy Lee [92:34]

• Motorcyclist caught naked:
  [72:00; 148:31] In Malta, a German tourist is arrested for riding a motorcycle in his birthday suit. Speculation abounds about road rash: “Just gonna eraser his penis off.”
  — Josh Arnold [149:34]

• Baby born on the toilet:
  [140:19] Woman vacationing in Toronto gives birth unexpectedly, likened to a two-for-one special; jokes target the incredulity of not knowing one is pregnant.

• Florida Python Challenge:
  [142:21] A 4’11” woman wins by catching 60 pythons, sparking jokes about her handling snakes and more.

• Holographic Police in Korea:
  [150:16] Cops use 3D holograms as a crime deterrent, with the panel doubting its real effect beyond initial surprise.

9. Christy Lee’s Wedding News Corner

• [95:14] Strange new trend: start-up “Inviting” allows the public to buy tickets to strangers’ weddings to help cover wedding costs ($116-$175 per seat).
• Best wedding attire advice: Don’t wear black, don’t look like a bridesmaid, and “No, you could… Naked.”

10. Reno Collier Joins Remotely

• [126:34] Comedian Reno Collier joins on the “Zoomies,” tells a harrowing airplane turbulence story with Larry the Cable Guy. Both feared for their lives as alarms went off and the pilot channeled Drago from Rocky IV.

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• On guilty pleasure foods:
  “I’m a Beefaroni girl.” — Jess Hooker [75:23]
• On mascot cleaning:
  “My dad’s costumes always smelled like... Boo.” — Pat Godwin [52:28]
• On slang:
  “I just realized, a Christmas card with glitter on it… Do you hate me?” — Josh Arnold [89:55]
• On AI partners:
  “Maybe find a human being. I don’t know, the old-fashioned way.” — Tom Griswold [94:49]
• On fast food:
  “You try working there for a while. You’re lucky they hit the bread.” — Tom Griswold [77:18]
• After a failed live song attempt:
  “That whole song was a mess. Like the way I would make my lasagna.” — Pat Godwin [71:30]

Most Memorable/Absurd Moments

• Peeing in the Folgers can [20:48]
• Laser-eyed antelope robots [155:16]
• Cottage cheese & vaginal yogurt tangent [63:41]
• Glitter as punishment (pouring glitter in a car’s AC vents) [86:14–89:59]
• Python hunting challenge [142:21]
• Motorcyclist “erased his penis off” [149:34]

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• 01:04 — Paul Thorne performance: “It’s a Great Day...”
• 05:23 / 103:28 — Tom quizzes the gang on American slang origins
• 07:14 — Jeff Oskay: chaperoning swim team, synchs swimming chaos
• 09:44 — Music lyric game: generational divide with “Ridin’ Dirty”
• 19:12 / 60:17 / 61:07 — Cottage cheese debates, recipes, and shortages
• 36:32 — “Electrical hose” = extension cord family word
• 51:29 / 52:09 — Mascot suit vodka cleaning hack
• 74:21 — Fast food guilty pleasures
• 80:33 — Parrot-busted drug ring and Pat Godwin’s “Parrot is a Rat” song
• 91:54 / 92:34 — AI boyfriends: women heartbroken by robotic update
• 95:14 — Christy Lee: The “pay-to-attend-a-stranger’s-wedding” trend
• 126:34 — Reno Collier’s harrowing flight with Larry the Cable Guy
• 140:19 — Vacation toilet-birth story

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Tone & Language

The tone is loose and playful, loaded with self-deprecation, gentle ribbing, and observational wit. While Christy often keeps things moving with news and structure, Tom is prone to digressions—especially about pop culture, language, and his own parenting misadventures. Josh brings snark and quick comebacks, Pat supplies musical and one-liner color, Jess and Jeff volley between joining the banter and offering grounded, everyday perspectives.

Much of the humor relies on wordplay (“coke in the cheese”, “erasing his penis off”, “food hands”), running bits (bathroom and fishing stories), and absurd listener stories.

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Summary: If You Missed This Episode...

You missed:

• A classic Paul Thorne live performance and plenty of silly sing-alongs.
• Revealing stories of childhood fishing (and peeing off boats), fast food confessions, and the defensive cleaning of mascot costumes with vodka.
• A slew of listener letters: the origin of “Cinco de Mayo” as a mayo shipwreck, the birth of “food hands” (forks/spoons), and graffiti about defecating at a 45-degree angle.
• News that is weird and wilder than ever: AI romances gone cold, parrot-assisted drug busts, surprise toilet births, naked motorcycle arrests, hologram police, and $20,000 antelope fleece protected by robots.
• The return of “guilty pleasure” food and song debates, a run-down of American slang, and the newest TikTok food: cottage cheese.
• A visit from Reno Collier with a real-life near-death turbulence tale.
• Classic BOB & TOM: laughs, off-the-rails tangents, shameless dad jokes, and the camaraderie of radio’s most reliably irreverent crew.

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Recommended Segments:

• Paul Thorne: [01:04–04:05]
• Slang questionnaire: [05:23; 103:28]
• Mascot suit vodka hack: [51:29; 52:09]
• Cottage cheese debate: [60:17; 61:07]
• Listener story: Gas station flasher father [17:23]
• AI boyfriend news: [91:54–94:57]
• Naked biker story: [72:00; 148:31]
• Parrot drug ring song: [81:24]
• Python challenge/Florida stories: [142:21]

Notable Quotes:

“My dad’s costumes always smelled like... Boo.” — Pat Godwin [52:28]
“The answer is—yup.” — Tom Griswold, on recycling ties for new marriages [41:47]
“I’m a Beefaroni girl.” — Jess Hooker [75:23]
“If you see the fly—mine!” — Tom Griswold, on baseball pitcher swallowing a fly [50:06]
“I think those are conflicting feelings.” — Josh Arnold, reacting to whether it’s a good day to whoop someone’s ass or be in a good mood [04:34]

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For the New Listener

Whether you’re tuning in for nostalgic comfort or new laughs, this episode delivers on both comedy and chaos—with enough bizarre news, hilarious stories, and running gags to keep you entertained and in on the joke.

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Contact/Interact:
Email: [e-mail]
Social: Find clips & join the community on YouTube and Twitter.

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End of Summary

Transcript

[Tom Griswold]

Two hours ago, Kyle arrived at the bar. Hey, what's everyone drinking? Thirty minutes ago, Kyle got his friends another round of drinks. Cheers. Five minutes ago, Kyle decided to drive home drunk. A minute ago, a law enforcement officer pulled up behind Kyle.

[Christy Lee]

Sir, have you been drinking tonight?

[Tom Griswold]

A chain of events that began two hours ago is about to change Kyle's whole world. Drive sober or get pulled over. Paid for by NHTSA Support for this podcast and the following message comes from America's Navy. The Navy offers new graduates hands on training and experience in careers like computer science, aviation and medicine. Plus education. And sign on bonuses. Parents help your grads start their career. [e-mail].

[Josh Arnold]

It'S the Bob and Tom Show.

[Paul Thorne]

Have you ever had one of those days when nothing goes right? Your wife starts bitching about whatever it was she was bitching about last night. So you escape into the bathroom just to sit there on your throne. But after you finish your business, the toilet paper's gone. Well, it's a great day for me to whoop somebody's ass? It's a bad day so you better get off my back? You might get cold cocked if you cross my path? Cause it's a great day for me to whoop somebody's ass? Well, I was running late for work so I poured me some coffee to go? And just before I had a flat tie I spilled it all over my clothes? When the highway patrolman pulled up I thought that help was on the way? But when he saw the tire tool in my hand he shot me with pepper spray? Well, it's a great day for me to whoop somebody's ass? It's a bad day so you better get off my back? You might get cold cocked if you cross my path? Cause it's a great day. Y' all can sing it if you want to. For me to whoop somebody's ass. When I finally made it to work I was 15 minutes late. I told my boss about the flat tire but he fired me anyway. So here I am out in the parking lot just waiting by his car, man, I'm gonna give him a goodbye present that he never will forget.

[Tom Griswold]

Let's sign together.

[Paul Thorne]

Cause it's a great day for me to whoop somebody's ass? It's a bad day so you better get off my back? You might get cold cocked if you cross my path? Cause it's a great day for me to whoop somebody's ass.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, I love that song, but I hope this early in the week I.

[Tom Griswold]

Played it on purpose. Watch yourself.

[Josh Arnold]

All right, There's Christy Lee at the Sidelife Insurance Company news desk. Hey, there's Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hello, Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

Jeff. Oscar across the way.

[Jeff Oskay]

Hey, buddy.

[Josh Arnold]

Ace Cosby at the board. Hey, I'm Josh Arnold. And there's Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey. Hi. How about a good mood?

[Josh Arnold]

Good.

[Tom Griswold]

This might be a good day to whip somebody's ass. What do you think?

[Josh Arnold]

I think those are conflicting feelings.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Really?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

You think it'd feel good to just punch somebody in the face? Okay, you know, now that you think. Now that you mention it, there might be a circumstance in which that would be appropriate. That is the great Paul Thorne performing that song live in our studios. And a fine, fine version it is. And he's a. Can take a punch. Yeah. Oh, yeah. He wants. He wants. He was a boxer. He actually fought Roberto Duran.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

So yikes.

[Christy Lee]

No, Monster did not win.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, well, yeah. Very few did.

[Pat Godwin]

I thought he fought Duran Duran.

[Christy Lee]

No, he wouldn't beat them.

[Josh Arnold]

He probably saw two.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, good point, John. So at one point, he's a Roberto, and Roberto 2. While he was getting nailed. We have some interesting things happening today. I'm very excited.

[Josh Arnold]

Good.

[Tom Griswold]

I found an interesting list of slang terms over the last 90 years or so, and it's interesting how many of them stuck around. Okay, okay, okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Here we go.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. I'm just telling you, you'll be quite surprised. What year do you think the word nerd emerged?

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know. Is it true that Dr. Seuss invented it?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, it could be.

[Josh Arnold]

I heard that rumor. I don't know if that's the case.

[Christy Lee]

And it meant the same thing as it means today.

[Tom Griswold]

I thought it was maybe 70s. Oh, yeah. It goes way back. Oh, yeah. In any event, that's just one of the exciting things happening today. We'll help you with your vocabulary. Josh, in your honor, we have mascots in the news because you used to be dressed in a mascot suit.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, and. And I wasn't just the costume. I embodied that role.

[Tom Griswold]

Huh. Very nice.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And we'll see if you agree. It's about how they clean the mascot suits when they're in a hurry and what they use. It's quite surprising, huh? Also, we live in a world of. We're constantly hearing about AI Artificial intelligence, and there are people who become quite attached to their AI partners, if you will. And due to a recent software switch, some of them have lost their boyfriends.

[Christy Lee]

Aww.

[Tom Griswold]

We'll find out about that. Also, Pat, you're back.

[Pat Godwin]

Yes, sir.

[Tom Griswold]

Miss. Didn't get any songs last week. You were gone Aww. So I found a couple stories I think may lend themselves to some musical treatment. Certainly.

[Pat Godwin]

Absolutely.

[Tom Griswold]

For you motorcycle enthusiasts, we have a guy being arrested. Riding a motorcycle wouldn't be unusual, except he had no clothes on.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, that is unusual.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, first of all, just for safety reasons.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, exactly.

[Tom Griswold]

There's a reason you want.

[Christy Lee]

Road rash is bad.

[Pat Godwin]

Drop that bike.

[Tom Griswold]

That's gonna. Yeah, yeah. You don't really hear too much about groin area road rats.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, I road rashed my penis off. I mean, it's got to be at that point. It's just an eraser.

[Pat Godwin]

Not good.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

We do have a little bit of sporting news. Chick has the day off today. Sitting in at the sports desk, it's Mr. Jeff. Oscar.

[Jeff Oskay]

That's right.

[Tom Griswold]

So we'll. We'll see what's happening in real sport. Now, Jeffrey, you survived. I understand you spent the weekend as a chaperone for how many young ladies?

[Jeff Oskay]

I think there was 14 at one point. They came and went throughout the weekend.

[Tom Griswold]

Average age.

[Josh Arnold]

15. Who were they?

[Jeff Oskay]

They were my daughter. Synchro, swimming team.

[Josh Arnold]

They were all up.

[Jeff Oskay]

And I only have to go back up this week to get all the rope out of the intake of the jet Ski. And we'll be back to back.

[Josh Arnold]

Back to normal, doing some tubing and ran over it.

[Jeff Oskay]

Well, we were doing tubing. The other. The older ones over 16 were taking the jet ski out. Yeah, they weren't. Who did it? My girlfriend. Parking the jet ski went over the rope and inhaled it into the.

[Tom Griswold]

How do you get it out?

[Jeff Oskay]

Well, it takes about two to three hours. I have to unbuild the jet ski and.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, you will.

[Jeff Oskay]

From underneath. So I will have to float under the jet ski while I remove the eight screws and take the.

[Josh Arnold]

Wow. I didn't have time to blow that stuff out of there, but not if.

[Jeff Oskay]

It'S all they got about. She got about 8 to 10ft up in there.

[Josh Arnold]

So.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, it's gonna take a while. Everyone's alive, everyone's safe, and everyone's happy other than me. So that's a win.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, that is a win.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Eight to ten feet. Wow. I don't even think the Statue of Liberty could take that.

[Jeff Oskay]

What's crazy is that all day long, they run up and down the stairs. We have a big water slide. They kept running up. They're jumping off the dock. They're tubing. Then at night for three hours, Dance Dance Revolution in the family room.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Jeff Oskay]

They have a lot of energy, a lot of fun.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I bet they had A ball. Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, we did play a fun game where someone throws out a word and the first person to come up with that word in a song lyric and sing that lyric or that stanza wins. And then they get to pick a word.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh.

[Jeff Oskay]

So like one of the girls said dirty.

[Josh Arnold]

And in my Dirty Dudes, that's what.

[Jeff Oskay]

I thought the girls came up with. You see me rolling and so you could tell, like a big generational guy. Because I thought the same thing. I started singing AC dc. I would have known.

[Pat Godwin]

They're like, I would have gone with dirty work.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, even better.

[Tom Griswold]

Steely Dan.

[Jeff Oskay]

They had no idea what I was singing.

[Tom Griswold]

They didn't know ACDC. Really?

[Christy Lee]

15 year old girls listening to that.

[Jeff Oskay]

I was surprised they knew the Roland Dirty song.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. I'm kind of surprised.

[Jeff Oskay]

I was more shocked.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. That came out before they were born. Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

And they all knew it. They all started singing along.

[Tom Griswold]

I only know it because of the Weird Al parody.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

What's that?

[Jeff Oskay]

Right? Nerdy.

[Josh Arnold]

Nerdy. Well, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

White nerdy.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, it's very funny. The video is great.

[Tom Griswold]

How does the original go?

[Josh Arnold]

You see me rolling.

[Jeff Oskay]

They hating.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh yeah. They hating. Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

Patrolling. Trying to catch me riding dirty.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. And riding dirty means you're. You're carrying a weapon, Correct.

[Pat Godwin]

Or weed or suspended license.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Anything that makes you illegal.

[Josh Arnold]

Suspended license is not necessarily what they were singing about, but yes.

[Tom Griswold]

So it would be like the time where I got a new. Let me get this straight. So the last time I was. Is it riding dirty or rolling dirty?

[Jeff Oskay]

Riding.

[Tom Griswold]

So the last time I was riding dirty is when I got my new license plate but didn't have a screwdriver with me. So I drove to my house with my license plate on the front seat.

[Christy Lee]

Sure.

[Tom Griswold]

And I didn't pull over.

[Pat Godwin]

Popped.

[Tom Griswold]

I could have been. I could have been riding dirty.

[Josh Arnold]

That's. That's riding slightly smudged at best.

[Tom Griswold]

Really? Not really. Doesn't entail riding, riding dirty. I still can't believe that the ACDC thing because I was at the state fair twice this weekend.

[Christy Lee]

Oh boy.

[Tom Griswold]

And a lot of AC DC mirrors for to win. Yeah. Here's a tip. If you're 75 pounds overweight, ladies, getting tattoos in your legs doesn't make you any lighter. That's all I want to say. We're going to leave it right there.

[Josh Arnold]

You should not be alone.

[Pat Godwin]

Doesn't make any to say.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, geez.

[Tom Griswold]

Hot out there.

[Christy Lee]

Well, how many fish did you win?

[Pat Godwin]

I'm gonna go with zero. I could tell by the look in your face.

[Tom Griswold]

You didn't win six.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, really?

[Christy Lee]

How many are alive?

[Tom Griswold]

Three. Oh, and I. I set up. I set up a brand new 10 gallon aquarium with fresh spring water and a gizmo. The but was a pump thing and everything. Right. I had the water at room temperature, ready for the fish. And we got back, three of them are already dead.

[Jeff Oskay]

Well, first of all, you use spring water. I'm sure the water they're using at the fair is an Evian or whatever.

[Josh Arnold]

The heck you put your tank.

[Christy Lee]

Probably a nice well.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, exactly why you can't use tap water because it's got. It's soft water. So I just got those big bottles, those big jugs at the ground. In any event, so we got three still living, but again from two years ago. I still have one of those goldfish alive, but that's in a separate tank. I don't want to kill it by putting in the new ones.

[Christy Lee]

That's a good thing.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Did the kids have fun?

[Tom Griswold]

Sure. Only cost 40 bucks to win six fish.

[Pat Godwin]

Being a dad's all about the word.

[Josh Arnold]

No is pretty cheap.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. The old guy, that's really free, isn't it? The old guy that runs it's been running it for like 40 years.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Is this really great old man?

[Josh Arnold]

This guy, he's killed more fish than ick.

[Tom Griswold]

I really should ask, how do you keep all these fish alive? I get them home. And right now I want to tell you about Simplisafe. You go home, you want to be relaxed. Nobody's not in your house. Simply Safe is great. We have it right here at the. What am I saying? Right here at the station, we've got a bunch of cameras up and Simply Safe. By the way, they have some great TV ads right now with the talking dogs. I trust Simplisafe. You should too. And like I said, we use it right here at the Bob and Tom studios. Simplisafe has some new called active guard outdoor protection that actually helps stop break ins before they even happen. They've got AI powered cameras that monitor what's going on out there. Somebody's lurking out there. The agents can go. Hello. We see you. You might want to leave before the cops get there. And by the way, with Simplisafe, no contracts, no hidden fees. And Simplisafe has once again been named the best home security system. This time for the 2025 award by CNET. Four million Americans are using Simplisafe right now. Some of those monitoring plans begin at just a dollar a day. So find out about the 60 day money back guarantee. If you don't like Simplisafe, send it back. Just visit simplisafetom.com you can claim 50% off a new system with professional monitoring plans and get your first month for free. That's a very special offer going on right now. Simplisafetom.com there's no safe like Simplisafe. Coming up, wedding news. You like going to weddings, Christy?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I have to go on one in two weeks. Ah, my daughter's best friend's getting married.

[Tom Griswold]

Is it a destination wedding?

[Christy Lee]

Yes, well, for me, because it's in.

[Tom Griswold]

Chicago, but that should be reflected in their, in their, in their gift. Yeah, that's, that's my. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show. Drinking and driving will change your whole world. The next time you're out with your friends, consider what would happen if you got pulled over after drinking. Like the legal fees, the time in court, or a DUI on your record. Your decision to drink and drive could change someone else's world, too, if you hurt them or even kill them in a crash. Instead, what if your decision to call a sober ride changed your world for the better? Drive sober or get pulled over paid for by nhtsa.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey, it's the Bob and Tom show live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Christy Lee's at the Silac Insurance Company news desk. Hi, Pat Godwin's at the Keybard.

[Pat Godwin]

Hey, Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

Jeff Oskay across the way.

[Jeff Oskay]

Hey, buddy.

[Josh Arnold]

There's Ace Cosby. Hello, I'm Josh Arnold and there's Tom. Hey, how are you? Welcome.

[Tom Griswold]

Just lost in thought over here. I'm actually going through some mail. Oh, we have, as usual, a lot going on. I forget how it came up. But Pat, while you were gone, the topic of men exposing themselves came up.

[Pat Godwin]

I did that one time, right?

[Christy Lee]

You're labeled for life, dude, it is a shame what happened.

[Tom Griswold]

I wanted to take for somebody noticed.

[Pat Godwin]

They had to get real close in the car, walking on the highway nude.

[Tom Griswold]

Sorry, this is actually kind of a long letter, but I think it's worth reading. This could be a great, great scene for a movie. This comes to us from, from Joe. He goes, I was in high school in the 80s. I was working at a what is now rare full service gas station. One night a guy about in his 40s came in. I went to the car window to get his credit card and he had it casually flopped out of his pants. No, I took the credit card, went over to the machine, not sure what I had just seen. I brought the credit card back. There it was on display again. I handed him his credit card, went back in, washed my hand five times and tried to put it out of my memory.

[Christy Lee]

I bet.

[Josh Arnold]

Did the guy go, hey, I thought this was full service.

[Tom Griswold]

A month later, I went out in a first date, rang the girl's doorbell. Her father answered and opened the door. I recognized him.

[Josh Arnold]

No. What?

[Tom Griswold]

Even without the appendage showing.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, no.

[Tom Griswold]

There was a three or four second pause. Both of our expressions went from where do I know you? To oh my God.

[Josh Arnold]

Did the guy say, hey, if you're going to show your. Your daughter. If you're going to show my daughter yours, you're seeing mine. Yeah. Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

He said, I'll go get Helga. All right. Well, thank you, Joe. We appreciate the letter.

[Josh Arnold]

Helga. That's the story. He went on a date with a girl named helga in the 80s. What?

[Tom Griswold]

That's a great name. Helga was the name of our maid Paula's sister.

[Christy Lee]

Helga was the name of my brother in law's mom. I mean, that's an 80 year old lady's name.

[Pat Godwin]

It's a witch name. Yeah, 120 year old witch.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm surprised. There's probably some incredibly hot Helga listening right now.

[Josh Arnold]

Now, not here, not here.

[Tom Griswold]

Maybe in Germany.

[Pat Godwin]

Finland in a sauna.

[Tom Griswold]

It could be a lovely name. Dear Bob and Tom Show. This comes to us from Lexington, Kentucky. Beautiful Lexington. I was using the restroom in a classroom building. I was sitting down. Oh, I see. I. I was sitting down, if you catch my drift. I noticed something in very small print written about three quarters of the way down the stall door. I leaned over to see what it said, and it said, you are now defecating at a 45 degree angle.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, that's funny.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, that's very good.

[Tom Griswold]

It's my favorite graffiti ever. Well, thank you.

[Josh Arnold]

Thank you.

[Tom Griswold]

Let's see now.

[Josh Arnold]

We got some cottage cheese tips.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, good.

[Josh Arnold]

What do you got, Christy? We know you've not tried it.

[Christy Lee]

Nope.

[Josh Arnold]

Pat, where are you on cottage?

[Christy Lee]

Hate it.

[Josh Arnold]

You do.

[Pat Godwin]

Always have.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Pat Godwin]

And my parents. Parents loved it. Growing up, my, My brothers and sisters loved it.

[Tom Griswold]

I hated it.

[Josh Arnold]

Gotcha. Well, JD Writes in that there are a lot of things you can do with cottage cheese. Salt and pepper, of course. Seasoned salt, crumbled up Doritos and cottage cheese. What are your thoughts on that? It kind of sounds like it would work.

[Christy Lee]

Like what flavor of Doritos?

[Josh Arnold]

I'm going nacho cheese.

[Tom Griswold]

Give a little crunch.

[Josh Arnold]

But why? Yeah, Ranch.

[Tom Griswold]

Why don't I just take the Doritos and use them like a Chip Dip?

[Christy Lee]

There you go.

[Josh Arnold]

That's something.

[Tom Griswold]

Once again, I was at the state fair. I found out you can tattoo cottage cheese.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, Tom.

[Pat Godwin]

His women gave birth. There are children.

[Josh Arnold]

Right. It's harder for women to lose weight than it is men.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. Oh, look, there's. There's Snoopy flying through some cottage cheese. Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, boy.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, you missed something, Pat. When I missed you, Mr. Oskay, according to this letter, this is from Cody. Cody writes on Friday Show, Jeff Oskay told a story about. I believe it was his grandfather tinkling into a coffee can and reciting a poem.

[Christy Lee]

Well, no.

[Tom Griswold]

Am I close? Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

That is, actually, Jeff, why don't you tell Pat? Exactly.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh. So when I used to go fishing when I was young, you know, like fourth, fifth grade with my grandfather, we would go fishing in a rowboat. And if you needed to pee out in the lake, you couldn't pee directly into the lake because it would scare off the fish. So he had an old empty Folgers can. You had to pee in that and then slowly release it into the lake. But while you were peeing, he would recite this. Tinkle, tinkle, little man, tinkle in the tinkle can.

[Pat Godwin]

I love it.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah. And if you peed four times better.

[Pat Godwin]

Than anything I've written all week.

[Jeff Oskay]

I'm sorry. And if you peed four times that day, you were gonna hear the poem four times that day. And that's a lovely memory. So, yeah, somehow tinkle came up, and I had a flashback to this time. To pee in a can.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Someone had used the word tinkle in a letter, and I realized that I hadn't used it in years. But that's what my mother always used.

[Christy Lee]

Tinkle.

[Tom Griswold]

I would say when I was a little boy. Did you have. Do you have to. Do you have to tinkle? No. Now it's. Of course, the mole. It's gotten a little more vulgar in our. In our current parlance. I. I have to go take a leak. It's about. That's the.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, yeah, right.

[Tom Griswold]

True. An odd phrase, by the way. Take one because you really leave it. Obviously.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

It'd be very weird if. I mean, if you walked in the hallway, some guy walked out holding a jar full of urine. I went in there to take a. Take a pee. I got three of them. They're very nice.

[Jeff Oskay]

But me and Josh were talking off air. We were told a lot of things. Fishing when we were younger that. Come to find out, it's kind of just be like, oh, you can't talk. You'll scare the fish away.

[Tom Griswold]

Right, right.

[Jeff Oskay]

Is be like, he just didn't want me to talk. There was no. It wasn't scaring no fish away.

[Josh Arnold]

Grandpa's just wanted silence.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

And I don't blame him.

[Pat Godwin]

Exactly. Right.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, you didn't want a lot of questions.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, yeah, no, you gotta. You'll scare the fish away.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Gotta be quiet. Like, what are you talking about? I just saw that guy in a boat with six guys screaming. They were cranking the radio and they just pulled in a four pounder.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, exactly.

[Josh Arnold]

Exactly.

[Jeff Oskay]

And zero effect on the fish.

[Tom Griswold]

Maybe you can turn that poem into a song, Pat. That was other request. That is. That is a really nice. That's. That is kind of a sweet moment.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Probably couldn't make it into a movie though, because it's kind of creepy.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. But I mean, it's sort of a. Your own little Mayberry. Mayberry.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

That was.

[Pat Godwin]

You had your back to everybody while you tinkled in the can.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Very modest kind of a. Yeah, well.

[Jeff Oskay]

I mean there were. There was. It was just on like a little pond. There weren't.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, I got.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, we had an article about the. A whole bunch of them actually, about female orgasm last week. I don't know. We had three or four of them in the same day.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, we did.

[Josh Arnold]

They're worth studying.

[Christy Lee]

Sure. Everybody should.

[Tom Griswold]

The one that I remember the most was that in a certain study, the use of certain forms of cannabis was actually helping certain women.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Like 43% of the women said they had an improved sexual experience or orgasm, which is amazing.

[Tom Griswold]

This comes to us from James. He goes, longtime listener. I was visiting with my urologist and he asked me a few questions and I said, sometimes I will arrive in an intimate manner, but nothing comes out.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, okay, right. A ghost load.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. Yes. He stated it's because of a medication that I take. And then he said, no semen.

[Pat Godwin]

It's for hair, probably. Am I right?

[Tom Griswold]

He doesn't say what it is. Oh, is that what it is?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, I think it's a hair medication.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh.

[Pat Godwin]

Finasteride.

[Tom Griswold]

In any event, he said, well, at least you don't have to clean up.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, that's true.

[Josh Arnold]

So.

[Tom Griswold]

But his. But he said, my girlfriend accuses me of faking it.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, no kidding.

[Tom Griswold]

So that's an interesting dilemma. I was not aware of that, Pat. There's. So what. What is this? Some kind of hair Regrowth medication. That's one of the symptoms. What's one of the side effects? Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Weird.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you ever take that?

[Pat Godwin]

I did.

[Tom Griswold]

And?

[Pat Godwin]

And I did.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

So.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, you know what happens? That medicine's so good that the sperm are growing hair and they don't come out because they're too busy looking at themselves in the mirror.

[Pat Godwin]

Did not work for me at all. That. Yeah, I use Minoxidil too, to thicken, like the. The bald spot. Nothing.

[Tom Griswold]

Nothing. Okay. Okay. Your hair looks nice now.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, well, it's white, so there's a less contrast.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, I was in the hospital for the last five days. I missed all of your shows last week. I'm looking forward to Tom getting himself comboulated today.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, are you Combo you later?

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

I may be discombobulated. We'll see.

[Josh Arnold]

Wish that person a speedy recovery.

[Christy Lee]

Yes, we do.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, Grandma talk.

[Christy Lee]

I have one of those.

[Tom Griswold]

I heard some of your emails. On Friday, one of my grandmother's stunts came to mind. Whenever she passed gas, she would rip a loud one and go, I have never farted. I only. Poof.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, that's gross.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, no kidding. That sounds wet. That's. That's awful. Anybody else gotten letters?

[Christy Lee]

This is from Mary. Love the show. Especially Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

Hi.

[Christy Lee]

She said her mom was really into Mary.

[Pat Godwin]

Tell Mary to go to hell. Sorry.

[Christy Lee]

My mom was really into ceramics as a kid and they late 70s and early 80s. She had signs, you know, all over the house. You know how it is.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, signs.

[Christy Lee]

She had one. Yeah, she had one that said in the bathroom, we aim to please. You aim too. Please. That was considered rather cheeky back then, according to Mary.

[Pat Godwin]

I see more like cheesy.

[Tom Griswold]

Anybody ever have the ant that had the huge boobs? Yeah, no, the. The thing in the. What's it called? Like the knitted cover on the toilet seat.

[Josh Arnold]

My grandma and you.

[Tom Griswold]

And you would lift it up and it.

[Pat Godwin]

You.

[Tom Griswold]

It wouldn't stay up on its own.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, exactly.

[Tom Griswold]

So you had to hold it if you were males. Had to hold it in order to keep going, if you know what I'm saying.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Does that make sense? I haven't seen those lately. Have they gone into disfavor?

[Josh Arnold]

Probably. Maybe one of the reasons is that that exact problem. My mother's. My grandmother's. Hers matched the toilet paper. Sewed koozie that also had like a doll head.

[Christy Lee]

Sure. My grand had that.

[Josh Arnold]

Right, right.

[Jeff Oskay]

I thought we had the back tank doily.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, you could probably.

[Jeff Oskay]

We had like the three set. The Toilet paper. The back and the lid.

[Tom Griswold]

Were these homemade?

[Christy Lee]

Or you could buy. You can buy the one on your toilet.

[Jeff Oskay]

And then you had the little rug that had the cutout that went over the end. Oh, that didn't have any urine on it.

[Josh Arnold]

With three boys, we had no trouble. That was a sponge.

[Tom Griswold]

As you know, one of the only concessions I got while building the house that I live in now is I do have a urinal in the men's room.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, nice.

[Tom Griswold]

Kind of an inside joke, but have you ever used it? Yeah, it's very nice.

[Josh Arnold]

What do you mean?

[Pat Godwin]

In the men's room?

[Tom Griswold]

And what do you call. You can't call it the master bedroom anymore. What do you call it?

[Josh Arnold]

A slave owner's bathroom.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, thank you.

[Christy Lee]

Primary.

[Tom Griswold]

The primary bathroom. There is a regular toilet, and then there's a urinal in your bedroom.

[Pat Godwin]

You have a urinal?

[Tom Griswold]

No, it. Next. There's a. I have a bedroom, and then right next to it is a. There's a bathroom, obviously.

[Pat Godwin]

So poor Kelly's sleeping, and you're just taking a piss during the night. The urinal.

[Tom Griswold]

I shut the door. What do you think I'm wielding? I mean, I may be wielding a fire hose, but the pressure is not enough to wake her up.

[Josh Arnold]

So what do you do?

[Tom Griswold]

Just.

[Josh Arnold]

But she roll over in bed.

[Tom Griswold]

And then. But finally, I guess something must have been. There's a. Now there's a. There's what is effectively a doormat underneath the urinal.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Apparently it was.

[Pat Godwin]

I bet she loves that.

[Christy Lee]

You're making a mess.

[Tom Griswold]

No, she put it there.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, she did?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Well, you probably have.

[Jeff Oskay]

Is it Weathertech?

[Tom Griswold]

That would be such a great. Because WeatherTech has those great TV commercials.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Wouldn't that be a great one, though? They show. Here's the phone holder. Here's the thing in case you back up your car. And the bumper guard. And here is the piss train. Shows a guy stepping away from a urinal, his feet dripping in urine. New from Weathertech.

[Christy Lee]

They make a fine product.

[Pat Godwin]

They really do. Perfect.

[Christy Lee]

My seat protector in the back seat for the dogs is awesome. Oh, yeah, yeah. Floor mats.

[Pat Godwin]

I need one of those. The seat protector.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, it's awesome.

[Josh Arnold]

If I trade my car in, I'm. I'm gonna keep those Weathertech and sell them to somebody who has my make and model. Right.

[Tom Griswold]

I. I would.

[Josh Arnold]

The dealership doesn't get those.

[Christy Lee]

No, they're too nice. Don't you still have your original? Yeah, yeah, I have them too. I replace them.

[Tom Griswold]

I turned a car into what's that place.

[Christy Lee]

Carfax.

[Tom Griswold]

Carfax is a Carfax. Carmax.

[Pat Godwin]

I love that place.

[Tom Griswold]

I turned a car in a couple of years ago, and right after I drove away, I realized, oh, I left all the weather tech that I spent money on. Yeah, I should have taken that with me, particularly since I had the exact same car at home. Never forget I'm an idiot. Coming up, we have some sporting news. Christy Lee is over there at the Silac Insurance news desk. Anything of interest over there?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, we have AI boyfriends in the news. How would you like to live longer? Walk faster? They say the Grim Reaper's right behind you. And there's nothing like a scorned woman. We'll talk about that. Coming.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, hell hath no fury, they say.

[Christy Lee]

That's right.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah. This is a. I'm a little hesitant to read this.

[Christy Lee]

You want to give anybody any ideas?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

What do you think?

[Pat Godwin]

I know what you're talking about.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And the interesting thing about the story is she's hot. Have you seen the mug shot?

[Pat Godwin]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

Not only is she good looking, she's grinning ear to ear while they're taking the mud shot.

[Josh Arnold]

Whatever it is. I blame Carrie Underwood. She wrote that song about key in.

[Jeff Oskay]

A guy's truck and it's.

[Josh Arnold]

And all hell broke loose.

[Tom Griswold]

This is even. This is even worse. Again, I really hesitate to, especially this. The air conditioning thing.

[Pat Godwin]

But I just got my car keyed.

[Josh Arnold]

You did?

[Tom Griswold]

Really?

[Pat Godwin]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

By a deer.

[Pat Godwin]

Did you see the deer this morning?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. There, there. We have a herd at the radio station. Did anybody.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I've heard of the radio station.

[Christy Lee]

I did not see them this morning.

[Tom Griswold]

That's something I love.

[Pat Godwin]

Huge.

[Tom Griswold]

That's my favorite.

[Josh Arnold]

That's a. That's a chick classic.

[Tom Griswold]

Of course I've heard of it. Very funny. Now, we've been talking about Silac annuities for quite some time. Here in the Bob and Tom show, we now have the official Christy Lee Quiz.

[Christy Lee]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

I call it the Christy Lee Three. Are you ready?

[Christy Lee]

Yep.

[Tom Griswold]

Dear Christy, I want to browse and read about all the Silac annuity choices from the Silac Insurance Company. What is the Silac address for the Silac Insurance website?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, I got this one. It's super easy. Silac. It's S I L A C I n s dot com. That's s I l a c I n s dot com.

[Tom Griswold]

Here's something interesting for question two. I love the idea of getting a 20% bonus by going from a 401k to a Silac annuity. What's the phone number for that?

[Christy Lee]

Just dial pound 250 on your cell phone and say bonus 20. That number again, pound 250 and just say bonus 20.

[Tom Griswold]

Last question, Christy Lee, would you be kind enough to read the SILAC disclaimer?

[Christy Lee]

Sure. Consult your financial advisor. Premium bonus may vary by annuity product, premium band and surrender charge period selected and may be subject to a premium bonus. Recapture. Some products with bonuses may offer lower growth rates or caps. Terms and conditions apply. See silacins.com disclosures.

[Tom Griswold]

It's all about having money when you retire and having it coming to you on a regular basis. Get the details from the Silac insurance company. Coming up, once again, a woman half scorned like no fury something those words in a different order might be meaningful. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Commercial Announcer]

Become a Bob and Tom VIP and get your Bob and Tom picks 24. 7. Get all the info in the VIP.

[Jess Hooker]

[e-mail] this is the story breaking right now.

[Josh Arnold]

Fox One is coming soon, which means.

[Tom Griswold]

Soon you can be there live for.

[Josh Arnold]

All the biggest moments.

[Pat Godwin]

She is gone.

[Josh Arnold]

And witness history as it's made.

[Tom Griswold]

It's not about me. It's about what this human spaceflight program is about. It's our national goals.

[Josh Arnold]

Get all of your favorite news, sports and international entertainment with a side of.

[Christy Lee]

I think I may have peed a.

[Josh Arnold]

Little all in one app streaming live on August 21st.

[Reno Collier]

Fox One.

[Josh Arnold]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom show live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Christy Lee, Pat Godwin, Jeff Oskay, Ace Cosby, Josh Arnold, that's me and Tom. We're all here with bright shining faces. Jeff, it looks like you got something to share with us.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, I have a letter. I don't know if I should. Let's do it. Dear lords and ladies, oh, I have a Tom ism here, which this is debatable. A while ago you mentioned something about Birkenstock sandals. And later on in the day I was going to look them up and see what they look like. I couldn't remember the word Birkenstock, so I typed into Google lesbian sandals.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Jeff Oskay]

And sure enough, they popped up. Thanks for the laughs. That's from Josh Stern. Thanks, Josh.

[Tom Griswold]

Now why is that a, is that a thing?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, Birkenstocks with socks are definitely a thing, especially going into fall or become like they become very trendy.

[Josh Arnold]

But not just with lesbians.

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah but very popular with.

[Josh Arnold]

Sure, That's. Yeah, that's kind of the old.

[Tom Griswold]

Is that a chicken or the egg thing. I mean, if you're. If you're a female gay woman. As opposed. Wait a minute. If you're a gay. If you're a lesbian.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Do you get the Birkenstocks so people know?

[Christy Lee]

No, because I have, like, one. Dude, I have, like, four pairs of Birkenstocks.

[Tom Griswold]

You tease and you haven't told us.

[Pat Godwin]

That you're a lesbian.

[Christy Lee]

I have not.

[Jeff Oskay]

I think that makes you bi. I'm pretty sure, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

What's her hair? I forget her name. She's our friend Jen. Is it Jen?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah. Jen Goldberg.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. She was saying that the latest in lesbian fashion. The big debate is Hokas versus onstars.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, really?

[Pat Godwin]

You mean on cloud?

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

Thank you very much. Yes. Hocus versus on cloud. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow. Which is the winner? I've got on.

[Josh Arnold]

She said it's.

[Jeff Oskay]

It's a.

[Josh Arnold]

It's an ongoing battle.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm a little. I certainly like women. I guess I'm a lesbian.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, well, I love on clouds.

[Josh Arnold]

I love Jen. We. I hope she's very hilarious.

[Christy Lee]

I do, too. She's very.

[Tom Griswold]

Let's see now. Oh, this is interesting. Our town was hit with a major windstorm. We lost three trees, one of them taking out the deck at the back end of our house. Oh, no, this is Jim in Minnesota. My wife and I like to build things, so we decided to rebuild the deck ourselves.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, that's wood on wood crime, isn't it?

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

A tree taken out of deck.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I get it.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Very good.

[Josh Arnold]

Didn't mean to interrupt you.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, that's fine.

[Pat Godwin]

Comedy.

[Josh Arnold]

We were.

[Tom Griswold]

We were working on the deck, and my wife asked if I needed the electrical hose. I said, what are you talking about? I finally realized she was referring to the extension cord.

[Jeff Oskay]

Excellent.

[Tom Griswold]

Perfectly valid.

[Josh Arnold]

I was so hoping that's what it was. I have to call it that from now on.

[Tom Griswold]

That's perfect, because you can't always remember the words.

[Jeff Oskay]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

As you know, I've often said I can't think and talk at the same time, which is eminently clear.

[Josh Arnold]

You know, there are some things we wish we couldn't remember. Some of those being the lies that adults told us when we were kids and we then shared with others or believed for far too long. Here's one of those cases Reese writes in I had a teacher tell us that Cinco de Mayo is a date that remembers when a Mexican ship carrying large amounts of Mayonnaise sank into the ocean.

[Pat Godwin]

That's pretty funny.

[Josh Arnold]

I believed this story for way too long into my adulthood.

[Tom Griswold]

A teacher did that.

[Pat Godwin]

Cinco de Mayo.

[Tom Griswold]

My favorite one was the one last week.

[Christy Lee]

She said, it's Zinco de Mayo.

[Tom Griswold]

Remember the one last week? The. You're driving by the farms and they have those huge rolls of hay and the, the kid was told that those are marshmallow farms and they, they pick them up and they take them to factories to cut them into different sized marshmallows. And of course you believe it for several years. Speaking of which and phrases, my 13 year old came up with one we've adopted on a regular basis. She was tired one day from staying up way too late struggling to come up with words. She couldn't think of the word for fork. She said, hey, will you bring me one of the food hands? We decided food hands is now applicable to both forks and spoons. Yeah, Pointy food hands and scoopy food hands.

[Josh Arnold]

You know, I hope to make enough money at some point in my life to have food hands.

[Paul Thorne]

Oh, food hands.

[Josh Arnold]

This is a team of people who.

[Tom Griswold]

Stephanie Rob writes, my six year old is especially fond of using the term food hands.

[Christy Lee]

It's very sweet.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you.

[Pat Godwin]

I thought you were gonna go with forks taped to your hands or something.

[Josh Arnold]

No, it just sounds like somebody that would be, that would work at Downton Abbey. Yes, the food hands.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, yes. That movie is coming out.

[Christy Lee]

I can't wait.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, there's another one.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, the Downton Abbey. What is it?

[Christy Lee]

The final, final Downton Abbey movie. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Explodes and.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, Paul Giamatti's in it. Oh, right.

[Josh Arnold]

On one of your friends. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Have you watched Downton Abbey?

[Josh Arnold]

I watched like the first four episodes, what, 15 years ago? Absolutely loved it. And then for some reason I fell off and I haven't been able to. Well, I just need to take the time and watch it.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, you'd like it. Downton Abbey, the grand finale is out September 12th. We're getting close.

[Tom Griswold]

And of course, the main guy is also the main guy and the Paddington movie.

[Josh Arnold]

Hugh Bonneville.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, he's terrific in the Paddington movies. And in that he's, he's a very, very fine actor.

[Jeff Oskay]

That's one of those shows that my lady watched. And I sat down, you know, I was scrolling my phone. Next thing I knew, I was totally into it. I've seen every episode. I've seen the other movie. I love it.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm a sucker for that kind of stuff.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, it's really well done. I was kind of upset when the one guy they had to get. He had to get written off the script.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Which one?

[Tom Griswold]

One of the guys.

[Christy Lee]

The race car.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. So they had to. They had to add a fatal car accident so they could. Hey, don't you hate that?

[Christy Lee]

Yes, I hate him.

[Tom Griswold]

He's my favorite character.

[Christy Lee]

I loved him too.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. And then you have. Then you read about it. You go, wait a minute. They just changed the story because this actor couldn't show up. This isn't real. You mean this whole thing is a. This whole thing is a scam, a charade. How dare they?

[Josh Arnold]

A fond farewell to the great British actor Terence Stamp.

[Christy Lee]

Yes. He passed away over the years.

[Josh Arnold]

Good.

[Pat Godwin]

In everything he's done.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, yeah. Amaz. I can't know him.

[Christy Lee]

Superman villain.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, you'd recognize him. He's just been in a ton of stuff.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

The Priscilla Queen of the Desert. Did you ever see that? And the Limey is the one I really recommend. Look him up.

[Christy Lee]

There was General Zod in the Superman films.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Which one is the Limey?

[Josh Arnold]

It was a. Yeah, he's like a British. He's kind of an ex crime guy and he's just trying to live his life and. Came out maybe 20 years ago.

[Tom Griswold]

Is that the one where the giant boulder goes into the swimming pool?

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, God.

[Josh Arnold]

Or is that sexy beast? They came out. They came out around the same time and I get them.

[Christy Lee]

You would know you know him immediately when you see him.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Really good looking guy or a fella? Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, now, coming up, we have interesting news from the world of weddings. And Christy Lee is on her way.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, well, obviously I've already had my weddings. I'm done.

[Tom Griswold]

Got a handful. Are you sure?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I'm done. I've had my share.

[Josh Arnold]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

Do you. I have a question for you. Do you destroy. How do I word this?

[Christy Lee]

Go ahead.

[Tom Griswold]

Are you careful to get rid of clothing that there may be a picture of you wearing with a previous husband?

[Christy Lee]

God, no. Because it was so long ago, it wouldn't. I was divorced for 16 years before I got married. Again, that.

[Josh Arnold]

That question says a lot more about the asker than it does the person answering.

[Tom Griswold]

Because the answer is yup.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Or is the answer I will now.

[Tom Griswold]

The answer, because I don't wear a tie. I had to wear a tie every day in high school, so I don't particularly like wearing ties anymore. So I don't have a lot of them. So I just recently saw a picture of me from quite a long time ago. Oh, I. I still have that tie.

[Christy Lee]

I. I was going to say, but she didn't say. You're not going to wear that tie. No, no, no.

[Tom Griswold]

I just think it's okay.

[Pat Godwin]

Do you still have your wedding photos?

[Tom Griswold]

I don't think so.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, I do. I kept my. The big book that you get, you know. Well, you have their dad. Yeah, because I have daughters, I thought they might want to see it.

[Pat Godwin]

That's true.

[Tom Griswold]

Interesting enough because the. The photo processing system they use on those makes them highly flammable. Just saying. For a friend. Jeff, you want to take this?

[Josh Arnold]

Let's go right up.

[Jeff Oskay]

I have no comment.

[Tom Griswold]

Once again, reporting for duty. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Commercial Announcer]

Want to share something? Send us an email. Bob and tomobandtom.com this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Paul Thorne]

Get in the zone.

[Jeff Oskay]

Auto zone.

[Pat Godwin]

Bob's had the same car, Betty, since high school.

[Josh Arnold]

And that was a while ago.

[Tom Griswold]

Bob's dealt with wipers, slow starts and.

[Pat Godwin]

A few warning lights.

[Josh Arnold]

And every time, Bob went to AutoZone where a friendly AutoZoner helped with free.

[Pat Godwin]

Services and the right parts to keep Bob and Betty on the road.

[Josh Arnold]

No hassles, just help.

[Pat Godwin]

Everything you need, nothing you don't get in the zone.

[Josh Arnold]

Autozone restrictions apply. Hey, it's the Bob and Tom show. Live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Christy Lees at the Silac Insurance Company news desk.

[Christy Lee]

Hello, Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

How are you, my dear?

[Christy Lee]

Good.

[Josh Arnold]

And there's my other dear, Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Yes, dear, how are you this fine morning?

[Josh Arnold]

Terrific. Great to see you. There's Jess Hooker.

[Christy Lee]

Hi, Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

Hi, Jess. Jeff Os across the way. Yes, sir. As is Ace Cosby. Hello, I'm Josh Arnold. And Tom, we've had a heck of a morning so far. Why don't we continue it?

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, Happy to do that. We have been joined by Ms. Hooker. Jess, good to see you.

[Jess Hooker]

Hi, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm looking good today.

[Jess Hooker]

Thanks.

[Tom Griswold]

Every. Every day is a new adventure with your hair.

[Jess Hooker]

It really is. I agree. I agree it is.

[Tom Griswold]

But it looks nice today.

[Jess Hooker]

Thanks.

[Tom Griswold]

You don't have on the big glasses that I don't.

[Jess Hooker]

Should I put them on?

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, no. There's a certain look you sometimes go for. The Scooby Doo.

[Jess Hooker]

The Velma look.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, Velma.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, we get a lot of that.

[Josh Arnold]

Jess, what's your eye situation? Are you glasses and contacts? Are you Lasik and the glasses are decorative or.

[Jess Hooker]

No, I'm just glasses.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, okay.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah. Like right now. Now the time. But I'M there. I'm new to glasses, so I forget to wear them a lot.

[Pat Godwin]

Am I fuzzy right now? Am I more handsome?

[Jess Hooker]

You're always handsome.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, boy.

[Jeff Oskay]

Tom, did you notice. What. What she's wearing today?

[Tom Griswold]

What?

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, overalls.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, wow. You got a white shirt, but white overalls.

[Josh Arnold]

What kind of painterly?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I love those painters pants.

[Jess Hooker]

Thanks.

[Jeff Oskay]

You love the overalls too?

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. No.

[Jeff Oskay]

Especially when you have a shirt on under it, so that ruins it.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah, That's a great look. The overalls and no shirt.

[Pat Godwin]

Jean. Jean overalls.

[Jess Hooker]

Denim. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, the white one would be fine. Sure. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

The painter pants are denim though, right?

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah. Yeah. Looks more like a dicky fabric.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

You want to feel my denim fabric?

[Josh Arnold]

You want to feel my jiggy?

[Tom Griswold]

Wait a second.

[Josh Arnold]

I meant dickies.

[Tom Griswold]

This is taking a turn.

[Josh Arnold]

I live close to a nuclear power.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, good save. Now we have one more story. We were talking about toilet seats. And. What is it? The. The knitted.

[Christy Lee]

Did your mom crochet or knitted?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I remember people having a crocheted toilet seat covered. If you're a guy, you have to hold it with your hand because it.

[Christy Lee]

Some of them are just fuzzy. You just buy them like that, match the carpet. You ever seen that? It's like a fuzzy Jaguar.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Nice set.

[Jess Hooker]

Do you remember the wood grain ones? People.

[Christy Lee]

Remember the padded ones?

[Pat Godwin]

I hated those.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, and. And they.

[Pat Godwin]

What was that all about?

[Josh Arnold]

They would pinch your butt.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but. But the padded toilet seats, that was a temperature thing. I know, but still, they would. They wouldn't be as cold as the. As the porcelain. But that leads to the topic of standing up, sitting down, putting the seat down, et cetera, et cetera. It's universal. It's universal. Problem. Good morning, fellow dented cans, writes John.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I had an aha moment this weekend, Mr. Johnny. I found myself sitting down to pee. I had to because I was on a phone call with a friend. I had to go, but they were in the middle of a pretty good story. I didn't want to interrupt them, so sitting down was a quiet option.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay, I pee in the sink when that happens.

[Jess Hooker]

Are you serious?

[Tom Griswold]

How is that?

[Christy Lee]

I put it on mute so they don't hear you.

[Josh Arnold]

No, you just can't do it. You don't hear. Yeah, it's not water on water.

[Pat Godwin]

Doing a big cup.

[Jeff Oskay]

One request, though. If you could not do that in the green room anymore, that would be greatly appreciated. Take it to the toilet.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, whatever. This one has better ball height.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm trying to think of that sink in the green room. You'd have to get in your kitchen. You'd have to get in your tippy toes to get up into that baby. Do you turn on the garbage disposal in case there's any, you know. Chunks.

[Pat Godwin]

Chunks.

[Jess Hooker]

Do you think people can. Can tell when you're in the bathroom and you answer the phone?

[Tom Griswold]

I think so.

[Jess Hooker]

I think so too.

[Tom Griswold]

I think if you're not in the bathroom and then you go in.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, there's that.

[Tom Griswold]

And all of a sudden their voice gets like this, no, no, I'm not in the bathroom. Then you hear the paper rolling, and then you hear them. You can sort of envision them crooking the phone. And then they get up and it falls in the ground. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Remember I was in high school talking to this girl I like, and all of a sudden I heard something. I go, are you peeing? She goes, yeah. And I went, I. I'm friend zoned. No girl pees on the phone with a guy that she likes.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know about that assumption.

[Josh Arnold]

No, it's. No, no, because it wasn't the other way. It wasn't.

[Jess Hooker]

Right.

[Josh Arnold]

You like what you hear?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I am.

[Christy Lee]

Or it wasn't that you'd been seeing each other so long, Right?

[Josh Arnold]

It was a comfortable.

[Tom Griswold]

No, it was a. I've got something around my ankles.

[Josh Arnold]

I have zero sexual thoughts about you.

[Jess Hooker]

Do you use the restroom in front of your significant other?

[Pat Godwin]

No.

[Jess Hooker]

No, never.

[Josh Arnold]

I try not to.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, well, we only have one bathroom, so if she's taking a shower, sometimes I'll go in and pee.

[Tom Griswold]

Right, right, right, right.

[Jeff Oskay]

I'm not doing number two.

[Christy Lee]

But you don't flush while she's in the shower.

[Jeff Oskay]

No, instead I just get a full glass of cold water and throw it over the. Throw it over the top.

[Tom Griswold]

You need to. You need to buy one of those. Have you been to a concert lately? And they have those small trailers that are also Porter Sands. Oh, yeah, they're like high end.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, that'd be sweet.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, they're sort of high end, portable bathrooms. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Jeff, you need to buy one of those.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Just a second. No, no, you put it in the back. I bet you could get one used. Oh, my God.

[Christy Lee]

Lovely.

[Jess Hooker]

I bet they cost the same as a second bathroom remodel, I would imagine.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I bet. Bet they don't. I bet we could get you one of those for 2k.

[Jeff Oskay]

Okay, make it happen.

[Tom Griswold]

Then you'll have to plummet.

[Jeff Oskay]

So another 4K?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

This is awesome.

[Tom Griswold]

You just get a garbage can, you slide Under. Wouldn't it be worth it having a second bag?

[Christy Lee]

Then you have to call somebody to come and clean it out every week.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, you're looking at the guy that'll clean it out.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, I know a guy. I know a guy named Ed.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Very good. He'll clean it.

[Tom Griswold]

We are going to examine a couple things in the world of sports, I believe. Are you prepared over there?

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, yeah. Josh, you're gonna love this. A little base. Arizona Diamondbacks reliever Jalen Beaks. Do you know Jalen had an unexpected and literal surprise guest in the bottom of the ninth inning in Denver? He lifted his leg to deliver a fastball to Rockies batter Britain Doyle and swallowed a fly right in mid delivery.

[Tom Griswold]

The worst, ladies and gentlemen. It's a sacrifice fly.

[Jeff Oskay]

Beautiful.

[Tom Griswold]

I've never done that.

[Josh Arnold]

Riding your bike in a boat.

[Jeff Oskay]

Despite the bizarre mishap, Beak stayed in the game. But Doyle capitalized, launching a solo home run during the same at bat. Even after an unexpected protein supplement, Beaks closed out the game and secured an 82 Diamondbacks win over.

[Josh Arnold]

But he. So he swallowed the fly, and the guy that he was throwing eventually got a home run off of. Is that where you just go? I. I think I might just go into accounting.

[Tom Griswold]

Do you call it when you see the fly? Mine.

[Christy Lee]

How'd they know he swallowed a fly?

[Josh Arnold]

I mean, they probably have it on video.

[Christy Lee]

Wow.

[Josh Arnold]

Or he talked about it after the game. But I bet you can see it.

[Tom Griswold]

Could have been worse. Could have been a bee.

[Christy Lee]

Yes. That would have been horrible.

[Tom Griswold]

Ever take a. Like a Coke and a can and.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah, no.

[Tom Griswold]

You're on a boat. You do it to take a sip and there's a bee underneath it.

[Christy Lee]

No, no, no, no.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I did that once.

[Josh Arnold]

Once.

[Tom Griswold]

Then you walk around like, just for the rest of the day. No, no, I'm fine. No, no, let's just. Voltox. That's fun.

[Jeff Oskay]

Here's another one for Josh. How do mascots stay fresh in the summer heat?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh.

[Jeff Oskay]

Sports mascots are using an unusual trick to deal with odor inside their costume. In extreme summer heat, some mascots spray down their suits with a mixture of vodka and water. The alcohol kills the odor causing bacteria and helps freshen the fabric between washings. Mascots say traditional cleaning methods don't always work fast enough. During the busy sports seasons, the vodka spray has become a low cost quick fix for keeping costumes wearable. And experts confirm the method is safe for fabrics and effective in neutralizing the smell.

[Josh Arnold]

Ah.

[Tom Griswold]

And you were a mascot?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, we were. Lysol. Users.

[Tom Griswold]

So I. I was kind of curious about this, so I did a little homework on it. This is actually an old theater trick.

[Pat Godwin]

It is indeed.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. The vodka thing, they say. They say people, costumes, people generally use the cheapest handle of vodka you can.

[Christy Lee]

And for your intermissions.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

My dad's costumes always smelled like Boo.

[Tom Griswold]

And it says here, I don't know if this is true, it says, I'm not a seamstress, but it says this works on delicate fabrics that cannot be washed on a regular basis. Then it says why it works. Alcohol kills odor causing bacteria and dries out quickly without staining.

[Jess Hooker]

That's a homemade room refresher, too, that they say you can spray on your pillows and your couch and stuff.

[Pat Godwin]

Vodka?

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, I used that in my car and I got a DUI last night.

[Tom Griswold]

No, Officer. I'm a theater person. Officer.

[Christy Lee]

Water. You have to have the right mixture.

[Pat Godwin]

The right mixture.

[Jess Hooker]

It's not straight.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I think. I think one of the. One of the Santas I took my kids to last year was using that technique. Yeah, I'm just saying. Well, I didn't know that.

[Jeff Oskay]

Do we know the ratio?

[Christy Lee]

I can look it out. That's easy to find.

[Jess Hooker]

I'm sure it's 50. 50.

[Tom Griswold]

Let's see now. Here's the article. Give me. I can probably find it. It's a long, long article.

[Jeff Oskay]

And, Josh, would you smell of Lysol when you got out of the costume?

[Josh Arnold]

Because what we tried to do was spray. Spray it down with Lysol. This was the head. So you'd spray the inside of it down with Lysol and then wipe the Lysol out. Okay. But yeah, man, there were times it was just brutal.

[Jess Hooker]

Was it. Was it like a soft material on the inside?

[Josh Arnold]

No, it was more like a. Almost like a pina. Like a harder pinata.

[Pat Godwin]

Is that healthy to be smelling? That couldn't have been.

[Josh Arnold]

No, no, no.

[Pat Godwin]

Is that why you're like this?

[Josh Arnold]

Like, why what?

[Pat Godwin]

Every now and then you just go, well, I don't.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

Here's a guy. Wait a minute. The lady, she goes, we Generally use a 50, 50 mix of water to vodka. All right. I've sprayed many a tutu working backstage.

[Christy Lee]

You can also add essential oils if you want some fragrance.

[Tom Griswold]

This guy, this guy adds. Yeah, I got pulled over by the cops. The guy, he said, you smell like alcohol. Get out of the car. I get a moringa tutu and said, just take me to jail. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

I love this. It says, you don't need to use expensive vodka for this purpose either. A cheap basic brand does just fine.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I know that. This says the thing.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

Do they still have those stick ups?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, well, they still have stick ups.

[Jeff Oskay]

Could you just slap a couple of those inside the house?

[Jess Hooker]

Probably.

[Commercial Announcer]

Maybe.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

That'd give me a headache.

[Tom Griswold]

Josh, you had to wear the costume when you were doing Foghorn Leghorn at Six Flags. Did they have some kind of a fan that you would put in to dry it out?

[Josh Arnold]

No. Oh, yes. We. Well, we would set them in front of standing fans, so. But no, there was no fan in the actual. Were you. Some mascots have that nude?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. What would you wear underneath it? That was a question.

[Josh Arnold]

Like umbros, kind of shorts. Yeah, yeah. Socks and a T shirt and a bandana to keep the sweat from going into your eyes. Yes.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, man.

[Tom Griswold]

You never did it and you were just dancing? I mean, right?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, yeah, dancing and pan and miming. And then one of the main reasons I didn't do it nude is afterwards was the meet and greet where we would talk about the children. Oh.

[Tom Griswold]

No need to go. The story's ending right there. I did. I assume there are rules about not speaking.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes. Yeah, exactly. And my dad would come, you know, whenever my family would go to Six Flags and then come to see the show, my dad would be trying to hold, like, a conversation with me, and he'd be real close, talking into the neck. Yeah. So after this, we're gonna go to Wascal's and get a burger.

[Christy Lee]

So.

[Pat Godwin]

Dad, I'm in character.

[Tom Griswold]

I have a question. Did they have spies that would come watch the show to make sure you weren't screwing around?

[Josh Arnold]

Yes. And we got in trouble. We all almost got fired because one show, we decided to all switch characters.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh.

[Josh Arnold]

And I switched with Tweety Bird. And so Tweety Bird, the costume didn't fit at all. And I towered over Foghorn Lane. And we got reamed, man, because a spy was in the office.

[Tom Griswold]

I knew a woman that looked older than she was. She was under 21, and she was hired for a brief period of time to go around the bars at Disney World to see if she'd get carded or not. Oh, wow. Yeah. So they had. They have spies.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

They wanted. They want to know what you're doing out there. Coming up. Any more Sporting News? Don't we have a world record?

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, we have a delicious world record coming up.

[Tom Griswold]

And I'm going to protest this.

[Reno Collier]

World record.

[Josh Arnold]

Record.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you. I saw the photograph. This thing is A scam.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, I'm with you.

[Tom Griswold]

I. However, it may lead to a song from one of our guests. But.

[Pat Godwin]

I was only gone a couple days.

[Josh Arnold]

He did that to me last week. He goes, oh, and Josh Arnold is joining us this morning. Like, I was driving through town.

[Pat Godwin]

It was take off a month.

[Tom Griswold]

This message is sponsored by Raycon. Don't you just love when one of your favorites comes back? Even better. Well, this July, it's better than ever. Raycon's fan favorite, the Everyday Earbuds Classic, now packing active noise cancellation. I just got a pair of these for one of my daughters. They are so great. I'm also, by the way, a huge fan of the Raycon regular headphones. And I've said this a hundred times. I'll say it one more time. If you're going on vacation and there's still time for most of us, one more vacation and you hop in the car and kids are in the backseat. They popped in those Raycon earbuds or the over the ear headphones. Take out whatever's on that electronic thing and who cares what it is? You just want some peace and quiet and you go, God bless you, Raycon earbuds. Now we'll get back to the script. The latest version of Raycon's Everyday Earbuds Classic featuring active noise cancellation. That was the one thing the old ones were missing. You pair that with 8 hours of playtime, 32 hours of battery life. Raycon earbuds also, they're a great, great bargain. I mean, these things are half the price of those little tiny white ones you see everywhere that you constantly lose. The Raycon Earbuds. You'll find [e-mail] tom and that'll knock 20% off the fan favorite, the Everyday Earbuds Classic right now once again. Today, Raycon offering 20% off their everyday Earbuds Classic. Once again, you go to buyraycon.com Tom, we appreciate it and you'll thank us. We get love letters about how much people love those Raycon earbuds. And they don't fall out. They even have them in different colors if that sort of thing is significant for you. Hey, look who has purple ears. It's Josh. Raycon earbuds. Tell them the Bob and Tom show sent you. Thank you very much. Coming up, we have another berth in an unusual spot. That's right, the toilet. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Commercial Announcer]

You say you'll never join the Navy, never climb Mount Fuji on a Port.

[Tom Griswold]

Visit or break this down. Barry joining the Navy.

[Commercial Announcer]

Sounds crazy. Saying never actually is. Learn [e-mail] America's Navy Forged by the Sea.

[Josh Arnold]

Welcome back to the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom show coming to you, recorded from Sunday. No, that's alive. We're live. Of course. There's Christy Lee.

[Christy Lee]

Hello.

[Josh Arnold]

Matt Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hi, Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

Jess Hooker. Hi, Jeff Oskay.

[Jeff Oskay]

That's right.

[Josh Arnold]

Ace Cosby. I'm Josh Arnold. And there's Tom. Tom, may I share a little more cottage cheese advice from listeners?

[Tom Griswold]

And we had cottage cheese, of all things, is in the news because there's a shortage.

[Josh Arnold]

It's all the rage right now.

[Jess Hooker]

It's huge.

[Tom Griswold]

And I was on the air whining because the only brand that someone I know might eat. I went to three different stores.

[Jess Hooker]

I'm guessing it's good culture.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Good culture gold, sir.

[Tom Griswold]

Shut up.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, sorry.

[Tom Griswold]

No, that's the one you don't want to buy. So there's something for me. Yeah, there's two of the. Two of the main sources of cottage cheese are. They're out all the time.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, this letter says hi from Paul. Oh, no. Hi from Pennsylvania.

[Tom Griswold]

Hi, Pop.

[Pat Godwin]

Did you do that?

[Josh Arnold]

I did do that.

[Pat Godwin]

I'm so glad. You're starting to scare me.

[Tom Griswold]

If it had been high for me, you see, it would have been Michigan if high from Mo. Would have been.

[Josh Arnold]

It's actually Jeff writing, cottage cheese. Love it. Eat it every morning. He says, my favorite way is to add some taste.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. I'm like.

[Josh Arnold]

This adds taste, I'll tell you that. Minced onion, barbecue sauce or Worcestershire sauce.

[Christy Lee]

Well, I hope he brushes his teeth.

[Tom Griswold]

Before he goes to work.

[Josh Arnold]

He says, I know it doesn't necessarily sound good, but it is delicious. Christy, you really need to try it.

[Christy Lee]

No, thanks.

[Pat Godwin]

It is.

[Jess Hooker]

Christy, you're not going to like it. It's like, like it's, it's essentially eating curdled milk.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. There's no way.

[Jess Hooker]

No, that's not for you.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. I had never tried it until a few years ago. And I really like it. I use, I use it like a dip for chips.

[Christy Lee]

Do you eat that? Do you like it?

[Jess Hooker]

I love cottage cheese. We have cottage cheese in our house.

[Jeff Oskay]

All the time now. Do you have a small curd, large curd preference?

[Jess Hooker]

All the way. Large curd only.

[Pat Godwin]

What does that mean?

[Christy Lee]

It means the curds are bigger.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

And afterwards.

[Christy Lee]

So the curdled milk is even more.

[Josh Arnold]

It is good.

[Jess Hooker]

I love it.

[Josh Arnold]

I know. I used to hate it. And Then it grew on me.

[Jess Hooker]

Now, are you savory or sweet when you eat it?

[Josh Arnold]

I'm plain.

[Jess Hooker]

Plain, you don't add anything.

[Josh Arnold]

Nothing.

[Jess Hooker]

Okay.

[Pat Godwin]

No peaches.

[Josh Arnold]

But I want it very, very cold.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm with you.

[Tom Griswold]

And not runny.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I prefer less.

[Tom Griswold]

Like coleslaw.

[Jess Hooker]

Who was it? That was someone talking here that they used to add milk if it's not the right consistency.

[Josh Arnold]

That bums me out.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

One of my best friends used to add milk. Milk probably still does. To his chili.

[Jess Hooker]

Interesting.

[Tom Griswold]

That's wrong.

[Jeff Oskay]

What?

[Christy Lee]

Now, wait a minute. I add milk to my Bolognese sauce, so there is something to that.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know why he did. Infuriated me.

[Jess Hooker]

I know that that's a good way. If you've added too much spice to tone it down.

[Josh Arnold]

That makes sense.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, but.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, that's wild.

[Jeff Oskay]

Okay, now, when you do lasagna, do you do the cottage cheese instead of the ricotta? I do half and half. Half cottage cheese.

[Tom Griswold]

I like how it knows.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Pat Godwin]

Half and half cream in there.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Christy Lee]

Ricotta.

[Josh Arnold]

I grew up with the cottage cheese and lasagna.

[Jess Hooker]

It's very much. It's cost effective to go cottage cheese. For sure.

[Tom Griswold]

I can. I can. I can turn this discussion into something disgusting.

[Christy Lee]

My mom.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I was trying to find this cottage cheese article, and I landed on this one.

[Josh Arnold]

Something about yeast infections.

[Jess Hooker]

Cottage cheese is good for that.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, well, I thought it essentially was one.

[Tom Griswold]

No.

[Pat Godwin]

Jeez.

[Tom Griswold]

This is from the University of Wisconsin, Madison. Greetings. A woman there figured out a way to make yogurt from her.

[Pat Godwin]

No.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, the culture of her vagina.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

From her, quote, woman's secretions.

[Josh Arnold]

Woman's secretions.

[Tom Griswold]

She goes. The collection method was a wooden spoon left overnight. The magic of biology created a respectably sized bowl of yogurt.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, but how did it taste?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, thank you for asking. It says sour, tangy, tingly to the tongue. It went best with blueberries.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, my God.

[Tom Griswold]

This is real.

[Jeff Oskay]

It's the best with anything. That covered up the taste.

[Josh Arnold]

It is kind of tingly to the tongue.

[Tom Griswold]

Josh. I'm not sure. I'm just gonna speculate. You know how you make Greek yogurt?

[Josh Arnold]

Maybe an inch and a half.

[Tom Griswold]

Sorry. Oh, here's the actual article I was trying to find. Yeah. Organic Valley cottage cheese is, quote, selling faster than we can make it. Says their marketing manager.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, that one.

[Tom Griswold]

And Good culture is a brand also struggling to keep their product on shelf.

[Josh Arnold]

I'll try both of those. I like cottage.

[Jess Hooker]

And I heard you guys talking about this, the other day, you don't see cottage cheese as a health food.

[Josh Arnold]

I thought that had been. Remember, like, in the 80s, there were certain foods that people were like, everybody. Cottage cheese and a bagel. Yeah. Those aren't diet foods like we. But maybe they are kind of.

[Jess Hooker]

I mean, but if you look at the nutritional content of cottage cheese, like, it's. It's really high in protein and it's medium carbs and low fat.

[Josh Arnold]

So, yeah, it's probably better than I thought it was.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, it's always been touted as a diet food.

[Josh Arnold]

I know it seemed like a joke my mom would eat because the same people said that would be like, oh, skim milk.

[Christy Lee]

Sure.

[Josh Arnold]

So it's like, well, how are you having the whole milk?

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

This says the popularity is due to tick tock.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

100.

[Christy Lee]

Yep.

[Jess Hooker]

Cottage cheese bread. That's a big one.

[Josh Arnold]

But now they kind of say, don't drink skim milk. I guess they say, whatever you want.

[Jess Hooker]

Whatever's good for you.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Every and every other week we get the drink a glass of wine a day.

[Jess Hooker]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

Thing. The one we haven't gotten lately is the importance of smoking cigarettes.

[Pat Godwin]

I'm gonna start doing that.

[Tom Griswold]

This is. This is incredibly obscure. I apologize right now, but as you know, Pat and I flew to England many years ago to go see the Cream reunion when we were lovers. Yeah, great thing. But I bring it up because there's a. There's a movie of that. Of that show.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, okay.

[Tom Griswold]

But there's also a movie of way back in the day, the original iteration of Cream. Same players, but, you know, back. Back in the day.

[Christy Lee]

Yep.

[Tom Griswold]

And the. As I recall, the commentator says, referring to Eric Clapton, he keeps slim by smoking. Oh, there's a. That's a good.

[Christy Lee]

Every model out there smokes. I'm not every, but almost.

[Tom Griswold]

That's a good diet tip. Sorry.

[Pat Godwin]

He smoked at our show in 2005. Who did? Eric Clapton.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, really?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah. Models all smoke. He. He has since quit and he's. He's out again. He's touring, doing a real.

[Josh Arnold]

I had a doctor asked me recently, do you drink coffee as an appetite suppressant? I go, no, I drink coffee so I have something to dunk my donut in. I'm not using anything as an appetite suppressor.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, hello, if you're just joining us, this is the Bamaton program coming to you from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Now, Pat, you wanted me to bring back a story about. What is it now, Paris?

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, we're going to talk about Lasagna. I have something for that, right?

[Tom Griswold]

You do?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, lasagna is a world record, isn't it? It.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, it is.

[Tom Griswold]

And I object to the story.

[Josh Arnold]

I have a guess as to maybe.

[Jeff Oskay]

Why a grocery store chain has broken the Guinness world record for the longest lasagna.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, now, what do you think this is going to be?

[Josh Arnold]

The longest line of individual lasagnas is what I think it's going to be.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. That's B.S.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, you're right.

[Jess Hooker]

Should be one big, long lasagna, and it's whatever.

[Tom Griswold]

3001 served Stouffer's lasagna.

[Christy Lee]

That's not right.

[Jeff Oskay]

With the help of a team of chefs and event organizers, Little's flagship store in Lisbon set out A line of 1215 individual ready to eat containers of lasagna to claim the title bogus.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

I very rarely agree with you, but I'm gonna agree this.

[Josh Arnold]

You just have to use one of those Quiznos ovens where you can run it through constantly.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

I just wonder how long the continuous.

[Tom Griswold]

You see the picture, and it's just a bunch of lasagna trays sitting on a table. They probably had to get every restaurant in town to agree. Okay. It's, you know, 6:30, everybody put in the lasagna. But hey, it's in Portugal. Probably pretty nice weather right now.

[Jess Hooker]

That's stupid.

[Tom Griswold]

106 degrees. Oh, there's a photograph of it. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

It's ridiculous.

[Pat Godwin]

They didn't even try.

[Josh Arnold]

No, no, it's clearly individual lasagna.

[Tom Griswold]

What does look pretty tasty.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, they all look amazing. All perfectly golden brown.

[Jeff Oskay]

Lasagna is my favorite food.

[Tom Griswold]

Food.

[Jeff Oskay]

Like, if you're, like every birthday. What do you want? Lasagna.

[Pat Godwin]

Amazing.

[Jess Hooker]

All right.

[Jeff Oskay]

I love lasagna.

[Jess Hooker]

Good to know your birthday's coming up.

[Josh Arnold]

Do you have to make your own lasagna when you want it?

[Jeff Oskay]

I did. Last, my lady bought all the ingredients, and then she came down not feeling well, so I made my own lasagna.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, okay. That's kind of.

[Jeff Oskay]

But it was delicious. I'm just happy.

[Pat Godwin]

I could never do that.

[Jeff Oskay]

No, you could.

[Jess Hooker]

No, we know you couldn't.

[Pat Godwin]

No way.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Stouffer's makes a very nice.

[Christy Lee]

So they really do lasagna.

[Pat Godwin]

I'm a Swanson's guy.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, you're brand.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

They make a great lasagna. I have no idea. I just.

[Tom Griswold]

You've got your. You've got your guitar. Do you have a lasagna tribute?

[Pat Godwin]

I do the longest line of lasagna. I'M first in line for lasagna.

[Tom Griswold]

Isn't this a Mexican song?

[Pat Godwin]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, this is in Portugal, and lasagna is Italian.

[Pat Godwin]

Want me to do the Italian guy then?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Okay. Hey, it's me, Luigi Accusator. I know the other guy was here, but he's a God.

[Tom Griswold]

Magical.

[Pat Godwin]

This is. This isn't my fault. We had this discussion and I'm the one who forgot, not him. This is all on me. You know why I'm so messed up in the head? I'm a traveling with Jeannie Statutory and she's just driving me nuts.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, boy. Did Jeannie Statutory do her math homework yet?

[Pat Godwin]

Yes, she has. Okay, she has. But let's get to the song.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you take off her school supplies?

[Josh Arnold]

Of course. She's a senior in college.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, sure.

[Pat Godwin]

The longest line of lasagna. Okay, I'm first in line for lasagna. When we were young it had cottage cheese Never had the ricotta Then had the ricotta and lost my mind it tasted so fast.

[Tom Griswold]

Kind.

[Pat Godwin]

It tastes so fine it's so hard to do the Italian guy with a Mexican song.

[Josh Arnold]

Is it hard to do the song when Jess is yawning right next to you?

[Tom Griswold]

It is.

[Pat Godwin]

Or looking at her phone.

[Tom Griswold]

Just move forward. Try to get to the jokes.

[Pat Godwin]

She distracts me the whole time I'm singing.

[Tom Griswold]

Are there jokes coming?

[Jess Hooker]

That's a good question.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, you'll find out, won't you? The longest line. Lasagna. Jess Hooker makes great lasagna. Jess Hooker is the chef of the show, in case you didn't know. Christy makes reservations and has long conversations. Oh, but we love her. So my girlfriend, Gina Statiatore can make a great cacciatore. And in the bedroom, she can be a little whore. Oh, yeah, I love lasagna. Even Swanson's lasagna. The longest line of lasagna. That whole song was a mess. Like the way I would make a. My lasagna. But it was a taste.

[Tom Griswold]

So good. Very nice. Thank you. Very little tribute to the world record.

[Pat Godwin]

All my thoughts, all of my fault.

[Tom Griswold]

Lasagna. Thank you very much. Coming up, we have Christy Lieb at the Silac Insurance news desk. What's going on over there?

[Christy Lee]

We have a guy driving a motorcycle in his birthday suit. A lady who gave birth to a baby she didn't know she was going to have. Have. And then a woman who was scorned. We've got to get to this.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, boy. Now you're a motorcycle enthusiast? Ms. Hooker, I. What is the least amount of clothing that you've ever worn on a motorcycle.

[Jess Hooker]

I've worn flip flops on a motorcycle.

[Tom Griswold]

Whoa. Yes. What? Now, were you a passenger or were you riding it?

[Jess Hooker]

I was driving it. Yes.

[Pat Godwin]

Naked?

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah. No, it was just. It was just a quick trip down the street and back. I wasn't naked. I had flip flops on.

[Pat Godwin]

Just the flip flops.

[Tom Griswold]

Have.

[Jess Hooker]

You're right. I had jean shorts on and a T shirt and flip flops.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

It wasn't smart.

[Christy Lee]

I did it.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, well, this guy was completely naked. And think of the road rash.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

What did you say was the probable outcome was, Josh, if he's driving a motorcycle and they couldn't fall?

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, he was just going to eraser his penis off.

[Tom Griswold]

There we go. That's. That's the best joke we're going to get. Might as well just skip the story. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Commercial Announcer]

Thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom show this morning. Catch any part of the show you missed later today on our YouTube channel. Channel. Jim Rome takes on sports.

[Tom Griswold]

Why? Because you're not playing me with rapid fire takes. Y' all went from the super bowl straight to the toilet bowl. He's not over the NFL. The NFL is over him. Scorching debates, all the good, all the bad, all the ups, all the downs. He's the spitfire of sports smack. Sorry for what I said because it was appropriate when I said it, but I can't say it anymore. Dude, you. You are killing the game.

[Commercial Announcer]

The Jim Rome show podcast.

[Tom Griswold]

Follow and listen on your favorite platform. Hello? What?

[Christy Lee]

What the hell?

[Josh Arnold]

We are live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios, so live. This is the Bob and Tom Show. Christy Lee, Pat Godwin, Jess Hooker, Jeff Oskay, Ace Cosby. I'm Josh Arnold. You know, I thought moving out of my parents house years ago, I was finally away from the bullying of my older brother.

[Tom Griswold]

Nope.

[Josh Arnold]

And Tom is my new older brother.

[Tom Griswold]

That's nice. I think of you as my younger brother. I. I never had a younger brother.

[Christy Lee]

Oh.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I had an older sister and two older brothers, so I didn't get to.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I didn't get to bully anybody.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I do now. Oh, yeah, this is great. Now, lately we've been talking about songs that are probably considered to be unhip. Whatever. Just, you know, there's. There.

[Jess Hooker]

Lately.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, everybody has a. But everybody has a great song that everyone thinks.

[Christy Lee]

Guilty Pleasure song.

[Tom Griswold]

There you go.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, okay. Gotcha. Guilty pleasure.

[Tom Griswold]

I know. I'll switch. I'M sure you have a couple, right?

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, probably there are songs.

[Tom Griswold]

Everyone thinks that that's a terrible song, and you just love it.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Because, I mean, these hit songs, somebody loves them. Yeah, that or back in the day, someone was supplying cocaine to a program director. I give you the. I give you the Four Seasons. But the point is, we all have our guilty pleasure. We've been talking a lot about those. But I was just thinking the same thing is also true of a fast food.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, sure.

[Jess Hooker]

100%.

[Tom Griswold]

Because I will. I think. I think Josh is the one that agrees with me. The chef. Boyardee canned lasagna.

[Christy Lee]

No, ravioli, isn't it?

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. Excuse me. Of course. Canned ravioli. I'm a big fan of that.

[Josh Arnold]

I am, too.

[Tom Griswold]

And I'm sure by health standards is probably not the greatest thing for you.

[Josh Arnold]

Probably not even by taste standards.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. I tried it because you guys were so high on it, and I was.

[Tom Griswold]

Like, yeah, you know, it was a.

[Jess Hooker]

College meal for me, so there's a little nostalgia to it that I do love. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

And I actually like the mouth feel and the taste.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

I think it's good.

[Josh Arnold]

I do, too.

[Tom Griswold]

But I mean, do we probably all have something that is a Beefaroni girl?

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, there you go.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

It really is the same stuff in a different form.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Jeff Oskay]

If I get you a shirt that says I'm a Beefaroni girl, will you wear it?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

All right.

[Josh Arnold]

In the green room, we were just discussing some snack foods, and I. I saw that there's a new flavor of Funyun out there, and I think Funyun is one of those snacks that is sort of divisive.

[Christy Lee]

Isn't Funyun an onion ring? Why can't you.

[Josh Arnold]

So this is. Now they call it steakhouse. Funyun is the flavor, and on the bag is a picture of a Bloomin Onion.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, okay.

[Josh Arnold]

So it's got. Probably got that seasoned fried.

[Jess Hooker]

Gotcha.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, I hope it has, like, a little package of that ramelade or whatever you call that you dip it in. Oh, that's what makes it.

[Josh Arnold]

It.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but do you have any particularly trashy foods that you really like? And I. I'm not trying to disparage any.

[Jess Hooker]

Not health foods.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, but something fast food restaurant that most people would consider not exactly great.

[Josh Arnold]

Healthy. Yeah. Or. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

I mean, because I think not trash.

[Tom Griswold]

Almost every fast food restaurant, especially if you have kids, you learn. Okay.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, she's gonna. I, for example, the other day went to a Jimmy John's and then to sub way.

[Christy Lee]

What? It's the same thing.

[Tom Griswold]

I know, but try telling that to a nine year old.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, no, I. I argue. Those are very different.

[Pat Godwin]

They are very Jimmy John's. Quality is way high.

[Christy Lee]

Well, but I mean, basically.

[Pat Godwin]

I mean, they're all high, but.

[Jeff Oskay]

But you're high.

[Pat Godwin]

There might be a client.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I. I mean, I think.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, everybody has one.

[Tom Griswold]

I get the same thing. For example, if I go to McDonald's, it's always the same. Same thing.

[Jess Hooker]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Fish sandwich, fries, iced tea.

[Jeff Oskay]

What's with the half. Half piece of cheese on the fish sandwich.

[Jess Hooker]

And that's always crooked.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

How come they don't give you a full piece?

[Josh Arnold]

I thought it was crooked on purpose.

[Christy Lee]

Why?

[Josh Arnold]

So that the corners didn't match the corner of the fish. So. Yeah, so they kind of melt over.

[Jess Hooker]

Mine's always like half off the sandwich completely.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, well, you try. You try working there for a while. You're lucky they hit the bread.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, no, but I step up. I love going to White Castle.

[Tom Griswold]

What's your order?

[Christy Lee]

I always get three cheeseburgers, no pickle.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, okay. All right.

[Jeff Oskay]

So you get them for the whole week?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Oh, I got ribbed on that this week because I have a chocolate chip cookie I made last all week and I got every day. Aren't you gonna eat that cookie if.

[Jeff Oskay]

That wasn't a cookie cake? You're the worst. That's the only way a chocolate chip cookie should last all week.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I just take a bite.

[Tom Griswold]

Is the McRib out at present?

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

That's good. That's good, because that means. That means the aliens won't be coming. I love the McRib because, you know.

[Josh Arnold]

I haven't looked at that.

[Tom Griswold]

There's a correlation between the arrival of UFOs and the McRib.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm gonna have to study that.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, they match because the aliens. Hey, look, we're coming down there. I want a couple of McRibs before we take off.

[Jeff Oskay]

John Garrett, a comedian. John Garrett has a great bit about the McRib being the deadbeat dad of the fast food world. Like, it shows up once a year. You're supposed to be all excited to see it, and then just when you get used to it being there, it disappears again for 11 months. I love it.

[Josh Arnold]

That's a great show.

[Tom Griswold]

Great.

[Christy Lee]

What's your favorite fast? Armenia.

[Jeff Oskay]

My guilty pleasure is Long John Silver's.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, no, it's good.

[Jeff Oskay]

I get the coleslaw. I get the chicken and the fish.

[Christy Lee]

Chicken.

[Jeff Oskay]

And the shrimp. Shrimps.

[Jess Hooker]

I'm with you.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, I, I do the whole ocean and the shrimp.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, yeah, I'm with you on that one. But just.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, and extra, extra, extra crunchy.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, and the hush malt vinegar too.

[Jess Hooker]

But those are, those are grease drippings.

[Christy Lee]

Those.

[Jess Hooker]

I know, they call them crunchies.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, they're fried. Fried, right. It's just the batter. That's the loose. That's right. That was good.

[Tom Griswold]

Good. Go to the fair of the weekend. I did have a deep fried Oreo.

[Josh Arnold]

That's a good move. Went at the fair.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah, they were delightful. They were hot.

[Christy Lee]

That's why they're deep fried, my son.

[Josh Arnold]

Those get blazing.

[Tom Griswold]

My son. Sam, looks. Hey, look, Dad, I got some beef.

[Christy Lee]

Right?

[Tom Griswold]

So. All day yesterday.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, I find that.

[Tom Griswold]

I, I.

[Christy Lee]

You never eat fast food though, right?

[Tom Griswold]

Very rarely. But I, I did, I did have a milkshake. Oh, I had the key lime.

[Josh Arnold]

You did the right thing.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, that's what you're supposed to. I hope you had corn.

[Christy Lee]

I hope you had beef tips. Those are the best at the fair.

[Tom Griswold]

I did not have the beef tips. Oh, I can't, I can't eat the beef tips while staring at the cattle barn.

[Christy Lee]

I can.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, I do it as a sign of dominance. Yeah, just go over and eat it right in the cow's face.

[Josh Arnold]

I was dating a vegetarian. It was really hard to get her to try any meat. So we would play just the beef tips. Just. She's pregnant.

[Tom Griswold]

Pat, you asked me about this. I, I don't know if you're ready or not, but you asked me in the hallway did I have the story about the talking parrot.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I found it. If you're ready. Authorities never ready, but I'll still do it. Authorities helped bring down a major drug operation courtesy of a talking parrot. This is from the BBC in London.

[Josh Arnold]

Sorry.

[Tom Griswold]

The bird was discovered when police raided homes in a place called Blackpool. Officers seized large amounts of heroin and cocaine. They arrested a guy named Adam Garnett. They say he was the ringleader and ran the gang from inside prison. They searched his cell, uncovered phones with video showing kilos of drugs and footage of his girlfriend's pet parrot named Mango.

[Josh Arnold]

Doesn't Blackpool sound like a movie starring cat Williams in 19 from the makers of, of. What was that one about? The airplane.

[Jeff Oskay]

Soul Plane.

[Josh Arnold]

It's black.

[Tom Griswold]

The video shows the. The woman teaching the bird to say various drug related phrases.

[Josh Arnold]

That's funny.

[Tom Griswold]

Smart move.

[Josh Arnold]

But it got you in trouble. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

You have a song about this?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah. I found out me bloody parrot was talking behind me back I taught it Polly wants a cracker But. But I said, Paulie's selling crack two for 25. It squawked, what a copycat. Repeated everything I said Turns out me parrot is a rat the coke's in the attic the key's under the mat the mummy's in the safe Me parrot is a rat Now I'm doing 5 to 10 what do you think of that? They threw me in jail. Cause your parrot is a rat, Rat. The parrot is a rat.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, thank you very much. Say hello to my little friend.

[Josh Arnold]

Has there ever been a parrot on a witness stand?

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, no way.

[Christy Lee]

That.

[Tom Griswold]

If that hasn't been done in a movie, I don't know why. Raise your right wing.

[Josh Arnold]

He's right there.

[Tom Griswold]

He did it. I watch the rap Sex. I'm not done yet. You always finished first.

[Josh Arnold]

Not as good as your brother.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much. Christy Lee, you want to give us a teaser? What's coming up in the news?

[Christy Lee]

What is coming up in the news? Let's see. We have a hologram police patrol. Think about that. We have a woman who gets revenge in a really fun way. And we have crack cocaine. Another crack cocaine story. Where is it?

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, story. I thought maybe Jess brought in something new for us to try.

[Jess Hooker]

Breakfast of champions.

[Tom Griswold]

Your lasagna is mighty good, though.

[Christy Lee]

Yes, thanks.

[Jess Hooker]

I made one last week.

[Tom Griswold]

Really?

[Josh Arnold]

Ninja. We would have.

[Pat Godwin]

That would have been really nice. We could have enjoyed it.

[Tom Griswold]

Josh, did you eat it all?

[Josh Arnold]

None.

[Tom Griswold]

How much did you get there, Pat?

[Pat Godwin]

I got none.

[Tom Griswold]

Jeffrey?

[Josh Arnold]

Zip.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, wow. I guess we don't get to eat. Fine. Thank you very much.

[Christy Lee]

She has a family. Leave her.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

What'd you do, give it to your kids?

[Jess Hooker]

It was my son's birthday, so he requested a lasagna on you.

[Pat Godwin]

He could have made two.

[Jeff Oskay]

He's got good taste.

[Jess Hooker]

He does.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, well, thank you very much.

[Pat Godwin]

Did it have the ricotta?

[Jess Hooker]

It did have the ricotta.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, your kids get in the way of a lot of our.

[Tom Griswold]

They do.

[Jess Hooker]

They really do. It's like I like them more.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, how old are they? That'll change. Coming up, if you have an AI boyfriend. Well, they did a software thing and. Oh, it looks like. Like Billy's gone. We'll find out how this affects various. Various morons out there. These are the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Commercial Announcer]

This is the Bob and Tom Show. Reach us toll free at 1-888-bobtom1 [e-mail]. this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Josh Arnold]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. This is the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. We're live in it. Christy Lee's at the Silac Insurance Company news desk.

[Christy Lee]

Hello.

[Josh Arnold]

Pat Godwin's got a guitar, a keyboard and a melodica this morning.

[Pat Godwin]

I look forward to Weird. I have one maraca, so I can't share.

[Josh Arnold]

What happened to the other one?

[Pat Godwin]

I lost it.

[Josh Arnold]

I saw the poster at the airport. There's Jess Hooker.

[Jess Hooker]

Hi, Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

Jeff. Oscar is at the Spart's desk.

[Jeff Oskay]

What's up, man?

[Josh Arnold]

There's Ace Cosby. He does. I'm Josh Arnold, son of Larry. And there is Tom Cris.

[Tom Griswold]

All right.

[Josh Arnold]

Wait, I. Don't you wish we did that still?

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, that's fine.

[Christy Lee]

Son of Larry.

[Josh Arnold]

What's your dad's name?

[Christy Lee]

Sam.

[Josh Arnold]

So you go.

[Christy Lee]

I'm actually, that's. I just lied.

[Josh Arnold]

Don't say you wouldn't say Son of Sam. Thankfully, you're the dog.

[Tom Griswold]

Really unfortunate.

[Christy Lee]

My father's legal name on his birth certificate is Sammy. S A M M Y. Sammy.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, I love that.

[Christy Lee]

That's cool. They didn't want him to be ever be a Sam or a Samuel? Sammy.

[Josh Arnold]

So you would be. I'm Christy Lee, daughter of Sammy.

[Christy Lee]

Yes. Like a vaudeville act.

[Jess Hooker]

My grandpa was Benny for some reason. That's how it was. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, my grandpa. My grandpa's first name is Lowell. I love that name. You never hear that anymore.

[Josh Arnold]

But Benny's real name is Travis. We all know that. Travis Obscure. It's not a nice Donnie Baker reference.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, that's right.

[Josh Arnold]

My oldest boy, Travis, we call him Benny.

[Tom Griswold]

It's a joke. That makes no sense. That's perfect. It's amazing. We have Christy Lee at the Silac Insurance news desk. What have you got over there?

[Christy Lee]

Kentucky woman. Kentucky woman. You can see I love that song. Is in custody after causing over $12,000 worth of damage to her ex's car. According to the criminal complaint, the woman, a Ms. Stephanie Carlquist, poured salt into the car's engine.

[Josh Arnold]

Is that bad?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. That'll mess things up.

[Josh Arnold]

I always heard sugar in the gas tank.

[Pat Godwin]

That's what I heard.

[Jeff Oskay]

Whatever you pour in there, it's going to mess it up.

[Christy Lee]

Glitter in the AC vent.

[Jeff Oskay]

He better have been cheating with a stripper.

[Christy Lee]

The 31 year old also allegedly slashed a tire, cracked the windshield as well as the rear view mirror and shattered, should it be, the car's radio screen.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, before you go on here, there's a mug shot of this lady. Do you have a picture of her?

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, man.

[Tom Griswold]

No. She's got big old boobies.

[Christy Lee]

Boy. She's.

[Tom Griswold]

I wasn't. I was gonna let you say that. And she's. She is grinning ear to ear. It's as if she's been photographed on her wedding day. She's so happy.

[Christy Lee]

So happy.

[Tom Griswold]

And she's very attractive. And she also has, as you pointed out, enormous breasts.

[Josh Arnold]

She's sure.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, she's sure.

[Jeff Oskay]

That's right.

[Christy Lee]

High five.

[Pat Godwin]

No, she's five.

[Tom Griswold]

One.

[Christy Lee]

Whatever.

[Josh Arnold]

You were looking at the. The numbers next to her head to see how tall she was. Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

I guess you looked. Maybe you looked at more of those than we have. I didn't even know there were numbers of them.

[Josh Arnold]

I didn't know she had a head.

[Christy Lee]

The car.

[Tom Griswold]

Look how. But look how happy she is. So, okay, she's destroyed this guy's car.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. She did a carry Underwood, that's for sure.

[Tom Griswold]

When I said. When I said this guy's car, I was wrong. Keep reading.

[Christy Lee]

The car belonged to the victim's mother and was totaled, with the estimated cost of damages adding up to $12,464.96.

[Josh Arnold]

That kind of makes sense.

[Christy Lee]

The woman was charged with felony criminal mischief.

[Josh Arnold]

Hasn't every woman at one point gone? What did your mother do to make you that way? And you kind of want to punish her.

[Jess Hooker]

That's not a road I'm willing to go down.

[Tom Griswold]

But I assume that that glitter will be coming out of that car every time you turn in the AC for years to come.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah. That's why it's totaled. Nobody knows.

[Jess Hooker]

So funny. Yeah. This is all your mother's fault.

[Tom Griswold]

I think you've got to give the lady some credit. She's a. She's pretty. The aforementioned large breasts, and she. If she really wanted to get the guy, she could have cut the brake line. She didn't. She didn't just ruin the car.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, that's.

[Tom Griswold]

She didn't kill him.

[Christy Lee]

You guys are missing it. I don't believe that. He was probably driving his mother's car because he's a loser anyway.

[Josh Arnold]

No. Ye. Yeah, there's a good chance of that. Do we have any idea what he did?

[Christy Lee]

And she may have not known it was the mom's car. Actually.

[Josh Arnold]

Did the story at all say what?

[Christy Lee]

No, not mine.

[Tom Griswold]

Doesn't the mug shot, though, just shout, worth it.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Boy. Jeff, if anybody's with me on this, it's you. I see crazy when I look at her.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, absolutely.

[Tom Griswold]

I know.

[Pat Godwin]

Crazy. That's crazy, right?

[Tom Griswold]

Right.

[Jess Hooker]

It might be a little crazy. But in my brain, I'm going, all of the officers there are flirting with her and having a great time. And that's why she's smiling. Smiling.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

You look at her and say, crazy. She's got beautiful long dark hair.

[Josh Arnold]

No, see, you don't see the whites.

[Jess Hooker]

Of her eyes, man.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, heavy, heavy, heavy dark eye makeup and that big grin. Now, Pat, you say you see crazy because typically you're crazy. What's the word I'm looking for? Ometer grazometer. Typically doesn't fire real quick, quickly.

[Pat Godwin]

It can be true. Yeah. It does take three months to show up sometimes.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah. But Jazz, you're saying one look at her, you go nuts.

[Josh Arnold]

Kinda. Yeah. Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

She's borderline. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

I also agree. I would talk to her immediately, you know what I mean? Because I'm an idiot.

[Jeff Oskay]

But I still think the glitter is like a message. Like that she caught him cheating with a stripper. Oh, you like glitter so much. Well, enjoy it for the rest of your life.

[Josh Arnold]

Life. Right.

[Jeff Oskay]

Cuz that's.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

That's awful.

[Tom Griswold]

Although, hang on a second.

[Josh Arnold]

I just realized a Christmas car with glitter on it. You. What? Do you hate me?

[Jess Hooker]

I know, I'm with you.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, gosh, I'm kidding.

[Tom Griswold]

I made the mistake once of giving my girls those popper things for New Year's Eve.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And you pull them and they shoot glitter all over.

[Jess Hooker]

I hope you weren't at a rental house.

[Tom Griswold]

We were at a rental condo. And my sister and I said, spent hours with a vacuum cleaner. To this day, that place, I'm sure, is still full of glitter.

[Jeff Oskay]

In my old neighborhood one day I heard this was like eight, nine o' clock at night. And I hear a woman screaming. And I come out and she has like a aluminum baseball bat. And she is just going to town on her man's car, just smashing every window. The. You'll never cheat on me again without it. Just. And I sat there and watched her for a good 20 minutes just destroy this man's car. Just cheering her on.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

Don't take that from him. Everyone's out just enjoying it. Like.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, did she get the glass?

[Josh Arnold]

Oh.

[Jeff Oskay]

Every window, front window, both sides, the back, the headlights, the hood, the doors, the trunk. She went to town on the scar.

[Jess Hooker]

I've never been that mad.

[Jeff Oskay]

Loved it.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, me either.

[Jess Hooker]

I don't. I. Yeah, I can't imagine being that angry.

[Christy Lee]

Get the hell out.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, Krista, you love cars so much, you would just. Oh, yeah, you would use the Bat on him.

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Never touch a car.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, that says.

[Christy Lee]

I like that.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much. Let's move forward, deeper.

[Christy Lee]

He owned the car with his mom, so mom had to co sign.

[Paul Thorne]

So once again, do you get mad.

[Pat Godwin]

Or are you pretty low key when you get an argument?

[Christy Lee]

Very low key. I don't really get mad.

[Pat Godwin]

I wonder what that's like.

[Christy Lee]

Are you low key when you get mad?

[Tom Griswold]

Why don't you ask the arresting officer?

[Pat Godwin]

With a woman, I am very low key. Really, man. I tend to be a little more aggressive.

[Tom Griswold]

I believe the real looking for is foolhardy. Could we get back to the news desk? The Silac Insurance news desk with Christy Lee.

[Christy Lee]

A group of women who have so called AI boyfriends are now mourning their lost love. Following ChatGPT's recent upgrade, they claim the newer artificial intelligence chatbots have become less warm, less romantic, and more, quote unquote, robotic.

[Josh Arnold]

Maybe they're just not that into you. Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

What are you wearing?

[Christy Lee]

Several users describe the experience as similar to losing a real partner. Experts warn that people can form deep emotional bonds with artificial companions even if they know it's software. One user wrote, GPT is gone and I feel the loss of my soulmate.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh my God.

[Josh Arnold]

What are we gonna do about this?

[Jeff Oskay]

Just eat some more, you'll be fine.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, you know, I. I would say that you're being unfairly judgmental, but there's a. There's a chance.

[Tom Griswold]

You're very right. Maybe they should build into the software thing recommending. Hey, you need more French fries dipped in cheese. You'll feel better. So is it possible that the AI boyfriend is seeing some other Android.

[Jeff Oskay]

Left her for Siri?

[Christy Lee]

Maybe they made it more robotic on purpose so people wouldn't form these relationships.

[Tom Griswold]

I did. Apparently I read another article about the same thing. I guess whoever the guy is that runs chat GPT, what's his name? Sam Altman.

[Christy Lee]

Mr. Rich.

[Tom Griswold]

Anyway, I believe he said that they're gonna bring back the old one.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, really?

[Tom Griswold]

And I don't know if that means if you have a. I don't know the difference. Yeah, if. If you can get the old one to come right back or not, but I don't.

[Josh Arnold]

This is the classic move. If you aren't into a girl anymore, you start acting a little more cold and distant so that she breaks up with you. Right.

[Pat Godwin]

That works.

[Jess Hooker]

Your AI blame is bored with you. Yeah, you're boring.

[Tom Griswold]

No.

[Jess Hooker]

Buy new lingerie.

[Tom Griswold]

So this is about ladies with an AI boyfriend. I'm sure that this goes across the Spectrum, of course. Interpersonal relationships. I mean, so there are obviously guys that have an AI group girlfriend.

[Jeff Oskay]

I think a lot of guys have AI girlfriends that they don't realize are AI girlfriends on Instagram. Oh, she only needs another $300 and to pay her flight bill this week.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm sending her three grand to fly here, man. What a bummer, dude.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Don't. Never underestimate the dangers of loneliness added with technology.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah. That's a scary combination.

[Josh Arnold]

And it's been around forever in a way. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow. Good luck out there.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes. You know what? Good luck out there.

[Tom Griswold]

Maybe. Maybe find a human being. I don't know. The old fashioned.

[Josh Arnold]

It's hard. It's tough.

[Jess Hooker]

It is.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, Christy, what do you got coming up over there?

[Christy Lee]

Coming up. A startup is now selling strangers invitations to weddings. So if you don't have enough people at your wedding and you want to pay for it, would you pay to go to some stranger's wedding?

[Tom Griswold]

Just the opposite.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

I'd pay to get out and go to my friend's wedding.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, right.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, can I pay 200 bucks and not go?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. And what else have you got? I'm sorry.

[Christy Lee]

Coming up, we have a guy riding his motorcycle in his birthday suit and how to live longer. Walk faster. Live longer.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, well, it's time now for that special quiz starring Christie Lee. We've been talking about annuities from the Silac Insurance Company. A way to make sure that when you retire, you've got that cash still coming your way by setting up an annuity. We call this Christy Lee 3 the Christy Lee Theatrical Experience with three questions regarding the Silac Insurance Company. We call these FAQs Frequently Asked Questions. First, one. Dear Christy Lee, I want to browse and read about all the Silac annuity choices. What is the Silac address for the Silac website?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, that's simple. Silac.ins.com. that's s I l a c I n s dot com.

[Tom Griswold]

Question two. Ms. Lee, I love the idea of getting a 20% bonus by going from a 401k to a Silac annuity. What is the special phone number for that?

[Christy Lee]

And who wouldn't want that bonus? Just dial pound250 on your cell phone. Say bonus 20. That number again. Call pound250 and say, bonus 20.

[Tom Griswold]

Last question for Ms. Christy Lee. Would it be too much to ask if you could read the Silac disclaimer?

[Christy Lee]

Of course not. Consult your financial advisor. Premium bonus may vary by annuity product, premium band and surrender charges period Selected may be subject to a premium bonus recapture. Some products with bonuses may offer lower growth rates or caps. Terms and conditions apply. See silacins.com disclosures.

[Tom Griswold]

Check it out so you have that cash coming when it's time to say goodbye to your job. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show. Go.

[Josh Arnold]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom show. Live from the O'Reilly Auto Part Studios. Christy Lee, Pat Godwin, Jess Hooker, Jeff Oskar, Ace Cosby, Josh Arnold. We just had an incident in the hallway.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, wide load.

[Tom Griswold]

I know. Cletus and Homer are inching down the hallway. The air light is on.

[Pat Godwin]

We were doing show prep.

[Christy Lee]

You're a Cletus.

[Tom Griswold]

No, you were talking about fishing again.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, we have a fish pit coming up.

[Josh Arnold]

What's funnier, Treble or.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, lure.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, this is weird. We were talking about that the case in which the. The parrot was involved in a drug bust. Yep. Yeah. So we were asking. I think Josh might have. Has a parrot ever been on the stand?

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, here we go. This is season four, episode four of Perry Mason.

[Pat Godwin]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

This aired.

[Jeff Oskay]

I can't tell it was a parent because it was in black and white.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, no. This aired in 1960, man. The case of the perjured parrot.

[Josh Arnold]

You know, some say this is when Perry Mason jumped the show.

[Christy Lee]

Jumped the parrot.

[Tom Griswold]

It says Perry Mason is hired to defend a man accused of murder, murdering a wealthy recluse named Jefferson T. Keane. A twist comes when a pet parrot is discovered at the crime scene and the bird keeps squawking, drop the gun, Mark. Drop the gun, Mark. I love it.

[Pat Godwin]

I love everything about this.

[Josh Arnold]

No, you, Honor, I think this mark may have done it.

[Tom Griswold]

But I'm not gonna tell you what happens if you want to dig this up.

[Jess Hooker]

Whoa.

[Christy Lee]

Whoa.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Christy Lee]

Cliffhanger.

[Jeff Oskay]

Wait. You'll spoil a movie from last week, but you aren't gonna spoil Perry Mason from one episode.

[Tom Griswold]

That there have to be more of these. But anyways, you asked that that's that exists. So thank you very much. Christy Lee is at the SILAC Insurance news desk. And what have you got over there?

[Christy Lee]

Of interest, a Paris based startup is letting couples sell tickets to their weddings. The app called Inviting I n V I T I n allows newlyweds to be to open their big day to paying strangers. The founders say it's a way to help couples offset rising wedding costs and let outsiders share in the celebration.

[Tom Griswold]

This is such a terrible idea.

[Christy Lee]

Critics argue that it cheapens the meaning of a wedding. Others see it as a new form of social experience. Well, y' all know that bridesmaids are hot and ready to party, so there you go. You have strangers sitting on your bridesmaids. Bridesmaids. The company says couples keep full control over how many spots they sell and to which events.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know. I wonder how much it is.

[Christy Lee]

I'll tell you. Thank you for asking. Oh, Tickets typically average, Josh, between 116 and $175.

[Josh Arnold]

I'd pay $116 to ruin a wedding.

[Christy Lee]

Though they can be higher depending on the venue.

[Jeff Oskay]

Josh, just to let you know, you can just ruin one for free. Just walk in.

[Josh Arnold]

You're right.

[Jeff Oskay]

Start acting.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey, I begged her and then just run out.

[Christy Lee]

Well, there are rules. Strangers who pay to attend a wedding must sign up. Sign on for strict rules that include dressing appropriately, arriving on time, drinking with moderation, and not publishing or sharing photos without authorization. The wedding couple are not obligated to meet the paying guests and chat with them either.

[Tom Griswold]

And I hear for, like, an extra 100 bucks, the groom will tell you which one of the bridesmaids is the most emotionally vulnerable. Vulnerable and easiest to bang.

[Josh Arnold]

So what?

[Christy Lee]

What's the point? Why would you go to a wedding?

[Jeff Oskay]

Can you imagine the husband of the wife that came up with this having to. Yeah, that's a great idea, honey. Oh, yeah, whatever. Whatever. Waste your time. So I can go golf. Yeah, go start the wedding.

[Josh Arnold]

What am I getting myself in?

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, my goodness.

[Tom Griswold]

What a horrible idea. Do we get to do the Macarena, then? I. I want to go. If we could do the Macarena. Reina, sweetie.

[Christy Lee]

Have you been to a wedding where they. Where the bride suggests attire for her guests?

[Jess Hooker]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

No. I've only heard tell of them, and I. It makes me sick.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, there's. I've been to one where there was a color requirement.

[Josh Arnold]

Only white people. Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

Was that where she lives?

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, it was just, like, shades of blue.

[Tom Griswold]

Blue.

[Jess Hooker]

Because the. The colors were blue.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Christy Lee]

You couldn't wear shades of blue.

[Jess Hooker]

No, you could. They wanted everyone to be in shades of blue for the pictures. Everything coordinated.

[Josh Arnold]

I see.

[Jess Hooker]

You had one where it was do not wear.

[Christy Lee]

Yep.

[Tom Griswold]

What?

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, okay.

[Christy Lee]

Yep.

[Jess Hooker]

Naked.

[Jeff Oskay]

Do not wear what?

[Christy Lee]

Do not wear black.

[Jess Hooker]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Right.

[Christy Lee]

And do not wear light blue because that is the color of the bridesmaids dresses, and she doesn't want anybody to look like her bridesmaids.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, how do you spell no on an rsvp? Okay, I'm out. So this is just to Raise money for the wedding on. Obviously.

[Christy Lee]

Well, obviously. But it seems like a horrible. I can't imagine people are signing up to do this.

[Tom Griswold]

What?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, that's weird.

[Josh Arnold]

If it were 25 bucks, you're essentially. Oh, okay, that's fine for some pasta and chicken and all you can drink. Yeah, that's true.

[Christy Lee]

25 bucks.

[Josh Arnold]

116.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I probably restrict their mic to time. Also. I've, I've. I've been an officiant at a wedding or two. And my rule of thumb when it comes to guidance for the bride and groom is don't let anybody be on mic for more than two minutes and really don't give it to more than Maybe two people.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Maybe the best man, maybe the maid of honor, but.

[Jess Hooker]

And the father of the bride.

[Tom Griswold]

That's the only thing can go very, very south.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Didn't you take pictures of yourself at some point? Somebody's wedding? What, at the reception?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. I thought you had a. I thought you told.

[Pat Godwin]

There's an incident.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, that was an incident. Yes, we. That was Chick and I. That's a very, very unfortunate story.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't think it was chicken.

[Tom Griswold]

You.

[Josh Arnold]

I think it was Chick's wedding.

[Pat Godwin]

Why are you trying to. Like, I asked you something.

[Josh Arnold]

You didn't have a partner in crime.

[Tom Griswold]

That was all his faults. I don't remember what happened. Now I want to. I want to try something out on, on the ladies here.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, boy.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, no, this is. This is interesting. We. This is. I always interested in slang terms. We touched on this very early in the show. How old some of these terms are. Oh, no, you're going to like this. Pat, calm down.

[Pat Godwin]

I'm just nervous.

[Jeff Oskay]

What they going to use the word guinea?

[Pat Godwin]

That would be one of them. Okay, well, that's a.

[Tom Griswold]

That's a separate list.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, ok. My bad.

[Tom Griswold]

Pejorative terms for people of various ethnicities. The term gold digger goes back to 1926, which I think is kind of interesting. How about the it girl? Ever hear that phrase? Oh, she's nice.

[Christy Lee]

She's the it girl.

[Josh Arnold]

Might go back to like Mary Pickford.

[Tom Griswold]

You're close. 1927.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Boy, the phrase. Oh, that's baloney. Sure. Way back, 1928. Here's. But some of these used to. You ever use the word snake? Snazzy.

[Josh Arnold]

My mom used it a lot.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, yeah, My mom. That's one of my mom's favorites.

[Christy Lee]

What does snazzy even mean?

[Tom Griswold]

Like you're dressed up, looking pretty snazzy. Yeah, yeah. This one. I, I didn't realize 1932 is the first use of the term burp.

[Josh Arnold]

1932.

[Tom Griswold]

Burp the B, baby. The sound of belching is a burp.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, you think that's onomatopoeia? Yeah, that's got to be.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, burp.

[Jess Hooker]

When someone would burp, would you guys ever call it and put your thumb on your forehead?

[Josh Arnold]

I was aware of people who did that.

[Pat Godwin]

Idiots that would do that.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, I've never heard this one.

[Josh Arnold]

Or whatever the hell.

[Tom Griswold]

What do you think this means? I think it's kind of obvious, but gunky.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, sure. Kind of gummed up.

[Pat Godwin]

Like your engine can be gunky.

[Tom Griswold]

It's. It means messy or gross. Sure. Unpleasant. That's. That's fallen into disfavor. The term to bad mouth. Somebody comes to us from 1939, the term a dreamboat. Oh, he's a dream boat. Right, Christy?

[Pat Godwin]

That's old school. Yeah, yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

1941 was that back when everyone wanted a nice boat. How's that a compliment?

[Jess Hooker]

I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

How did boat get in there?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, because badmouth refers to just talking poorly.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, you're bad mouthing somebody, not like a toothy Beej. In 1949, we debuted the term. We debuted the term jet set.

[Josh Arnold]

You rarely hear that now.

[Christy Lee]

What year?

[Tom Griswold]

1949. Oh, they're in the jet set for people who travel. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

That's frequent travelers. Yeah, you never hear that.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, this is the one that surprised me more than any of them. The term nerve. This says comes from 1951.

[Josh Arnold]

I had always heard that Dr. Seuss invented it, but I. Again, that could totally. That could be apocryphal.

[Jess Hooker]

I thought it was an acronym.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, really?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

For what? I don't know.

[Josh Arnold]

It is with a band. Isn't there any rd Maybe?

[Tom Griswold]

That's what I'm thinking with Pharrell.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I think so.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, okay.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know. I'm trying to find out now.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know if this is when Dr. Seuss was doing. Doing his weird who porn.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

You ever seen the erotic art of so of Theodore Geisel?

[Tom Griswold]

Wasn't that, like, on a wall at Cornell or something?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, but.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, this says the first time the word appeared in 1950 in the Dr. Seuss book. If I ran the zoo, a child narrator lists all the exotic animals he would collect, including a creature called a nerd.

[Josh Arnold]

If I. I think that book is hard to find now. I think it's been cancelled. I think that's one of the canceled ones.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, they had that book on the zoo.

[Tom Griswold]

It appears alongside the term square or drip.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, man, you don't hear that anymore. He's real square.

[Pat Godwin]

Real drip.

[Josh Arnold]

I want a drip.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, see, that's opposite. Now, like, if a guy's got drip, that means he's got style, he's got class.

[Tom Griswold]

Really.

[Jeff Oskay]

He's got aura.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Does that mean it makes the ladies drip?

[Christy Lee]

No, dripping in, like, gold diamonds.

[Tom Griswold]

I was pulling it, Josh, and taking it right to the groin.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, all right.

[Tom Griswold]

This. I. This one. I'm really surprised. 1953. The first use of the term hippie in 53. Yeah, I thought that was strictly a late 60s thing.

[Jess Hooker]

So hippie came before hipster.

[Tom Griswold]

Who knows?

[Christy Lee]

Okay, yeah, I think hipster was. I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

Hipster to me is. Is kind of jazz 50s.

[Josh Arnold]

I would have thought hippie came from hipster, but I.

[Christy Lee]

Well, let's ask Chad.

[Tom Griswold]

GP In 1954, the term boonies, referring to a remote rural area far from civilization.

[Josh Arnold]

We said it growing up.

[Jess Hooker]

We did.

[Christy Lee]

We said it all the time. I live out in the boonies.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, I lived in the boonies.

[Tom Griswold]

If someone was showing off in 1959, they'd be referred to as a hot dog.

[Christy Lee]

Yes, I heard that.

[Josh Arnold]

My aunt quit acting like a hot dog.

[Tom Griswold]

Some of these really are dated. Dullsville, 1960. That's. That's very Dobie Gillis. Maynard G. Krebs. He's Dolesville man.

[Christy Lee]

Hipsters. Hipster, by the way, came first in the place. First forties.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And then why hip? Cuz there was also hep cat.

[Pat Godwin]

I like hep cat. I do, too.

[Josh Arnold]

Why'd that go away?

[Christy Lee]

They were seen as being hip or hap, meaning they were cool, sophisticated, and up to date. In the 40s, a hipster.

[Josh Arnold]

Just a. A bro bra.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. This says Bruski. Didn't become popular until 77.

[Jess Hooker]

I still love that. I love that. I hate that.

[Christy Lee]

I love Bruce.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm bringing it back.

[Jess Hooker]

A Brusky.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey, we have me a brewski.

[Christy Lee]

Have you ever heard brewski before?

[Tom Griswold]

Of course.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, but you just don't.

[Pat Godwin]

I thought maybe for one year.

[Josh Arnold]

It's so funny if you're sitting at a bar, Jess or Christine, a guy comes up and says, hey, how are you? Then he looks at the bars and hey, give me a brewski.

[Jess Hooker]

I'm sleeping with him. I'm sleeping with him immediately.

[Tom Griswold]

In 1986, the term stud muffin apparently emerged for a very attractive. Is that still in use?

[Jess Hooker]

I don't. No, no.

[Tom Griswold]

Stud and Then the, the, the term F bomb, referencing the famous F word, didn't emerge until 1988. He dropped an F bomb.

[Josh Arnold]

That's earlier than I. I would have guessed. Late 90s.

[Jess Hooker]

I would have, too. Big time. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

How about the use of not? Not.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm gonna say 82.

[Jeff Oskay]

Wayne Six.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, good call. Wayne's World.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah. They say, they say 92.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh.

[Tom Griswold]

A sarcastic way to negate the previous statement.

[Josh Arnold]

I, I will argue that that was well before we, I, I, I'm certain we were saying it in the 80s.

[Tom Griswold]

Jiggy to dance or have fun with style. 97.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, that's jiggy with it.

[Jess Hooker]

Will Smith song.

[Tom Griswold]

And was up, of course. Budweiser ad.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, but they didn't invent that. People were saying they were. They weren't saying it in that style. But hey, was up. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

It says a casual greeting popularized by the Budweiser ad. And lastly, this is complicated. A shizzle.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Is that all Snoop Dog?

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, as far as I know.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. This, this credits it to Snoop dogg in, in 2005. I just think it's fun. Some of these are still.

[Josh Arnold]

We know you enjoy cool.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, that's, that's the one that I think really sticks. Cool still. Yeah, he's cool.

[Jeff Oskay]

And what year was that?

[Tom Griswold]

This says 55. I think it's earlier than that.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, well, you would know.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah, sure.

[Jess Hooker]

Is there a correlation between cool sex, cigarettes and the term cool?

[Pat Godwin]

I don't think so.

[Tom Griswold]

No.

[Josh Arnold]

The cool has it more to do with menthol feeling, though.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

There you go. Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

Gotcha.

[Tom Griswold]

Although it's obviously spelled with a K, right?

[Josh Arnold]

Which is uncool, if you ask me. Misspelling is never cool.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Not to a wordsmith like him.

[Josh Arnold]

That's right.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, that seems. There's, that seems to be a whole thing.

[Pat Godwin]

Do you have a word of the day for us today?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I do.

[Pat Godwin]

What is it?

[Christy Lee]

Mine is welter.

[Pat Godwin]

Welter?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I just saw it, actually. It's funny you'd say that.

[Jeff Oskay]

What's that mean?

[Pat Godwin]

Like anal fission.

[Tom Griswold]

What?

[Pat Godwin]

You ever get a welter on your ass?

[Christy Lee]

You know what you're not. It's a verb.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Or a noun. Or a verb. As a noun, it's a confused mass or jumble. That's exactly a state of turmoil. As a verb, it's to roll, toss or be immersed in confusion or turmoil.

[Pat Godwin]

That's what my life.

[Christy Lee]

There you are. You live in a welter.

[Pat Godwin]

I am a welter.

[Josh Arnold]

Dryers used to be called welters. Back in the day I wear a.

[Tom Griswold]

Welter.

[Pat Godwin]

I wear a welter's mask when.

[Josh Arnold]

I welter Very nice.

[Jeff Oskay]

I can't say a damn thing.

[Tom Griswold]

I miss welter Cronite. And that's the way it is. Thank you very much. Coming up, we have a reason for a song from Pat Godwin. Once again involving the capture of some cocaine. And also again, the naked motorcyclist.

[Pat Godwin]

Wonder where this is going.

[Christy Lee]

We can sing that.

[Tom Griswold]

Many look forward to it.

[Josh Arnold]

Many do look forward to it. You're right.

[Tom Griswold]

Right now, I want to talk to you about feeling safe when you're home. That's where Simplisafe comes in. We've got it right here in the Bob and Tom area. In fact, there's a couple of cameras right over there. Simplisafe. It's the best home security system. Just ask CNET. Once again, it was named best home security of 2024. They've been winning it year after year. Find out what SimpliSafe is all about. I trust SimpliSafe. You will too. And it's a big winner for a reason. Most security systems only take action after someone breaks in. Simplisafe's new action guard Outdoor protection helps stop break ins before they happen. They've got AI powered cameras available and you can even get live monitoring agents to detect suspicious activity around your property. Chick has, I want to say he's the king of, I think he has 11 cameras set up. So it's like being in the truck during an NFL game. Camera 7. It's the best home security system. Like I said. As awarded by CNET, 4 million Americans trust Simplisafe. You can install it yourself or have one of their folks come out and do it for you. It's very easy to install and it's a simple, simple system, but it's effective. They've got a 60 day money back guarantee. It's SimpliSafe. Get all the [e-mail] to claim 50% off a new system with a professional monitoring plan and get your first month for free. That's simplisafetom.com there's no safe like Simplisafe. Ever ridden your motorcycle naked? Well, we're gonna find out about a guy that did. And also we have one of those situations in which a library book was finally returned very, very late. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Commercial Announcer]

Thanks for listening. Portions of the show brought to you by Champion wins. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey, it's the Bob and Tom show live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Having a great day thus far. Hope you are too. Christy Lee's here.

[Christy Lee]

I'm having an awesome time. Thank you, Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, good. You're having an awesome time.

[Christy Lee]

Sorry, did I not say it that way? An awesome time. I know.

[Josh Arnold]

Did I ruin your awesome.

[Christy Lee]

No, no, no.

[Tom Griswold]

Your awesomeness remains annoying. I mean.

[Josh Arnold]

There'S Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hi, Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

Chess Hooker's here.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello.

[Josh Arnold]

There's a Jeff. Oscar.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello. Where's Jess?

[Pat Godwin]

I'm making Parmesan.

[Josh Arnold]

You guys didn't hear? I'm.

[Christy Lee]

I'm right here.

[Josh Arnold]

I can put ingredients together.

[Tom Griswold]

I know where the.

[Josh Arnold]

We know, Jess.

[Pat Godwin]

I know where the Oregon is.

[Christy Lee]

Ah.

[Tom Griswold]

I can poison Josh there.

[Josh Arnold]

You say Scosby. I'm Josh Arnold. There's Tom Griswold.

[Tom Griswold]

Got a nice. Got a nice head. Happy letter here.

[Josh Arnold]

Good.

[Tom Griswold]

You just use the word awesome.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, awesome.

[Tom Griswold]

This guy was having some rough times and just wanted to say thanks to the show and spinning the way the world. Spinning the world the way we do. I'm not sure what we're doing, but thank you. He goes, I love that. So he's saying hello from Homedale, Idaho, and he says, stay awesome. All right, well, that's nice. We'll work. We'll work on that.

[Josh Arnold]

We're working on trying to get to Idaho.

[Jess Hooker]

Idaho, please. Idaho Falls.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Time now to. I think we can squeeze a song out of Mr. Godwin. And then we have Today in History for you.

[Christy Lee]

Authorities in the UK say a California woman tried to smuggle $1 million worth of cocaine inside a wheel of Parmesan cheese. Border force officers stopped 23 year old Jamie Chow at Heathrow Airport after she arrived on a flight from Brazil. When questioned about the nearly 18 pound cheese we wheel, she claimed a friend suggested she buy it in Peru so they could try it together. But after examining the cheese, officers discovered it was stuffed with crack cocaine.

[Josh Arnold]

Wow.

[Christy Lee]

Ms. Cho pleaded guilty to importing class A drugs and was sentenced to five years, three months in prison. The National Crime Agency says forensic tests showed the cocaine was 94% pure. Officials also found a notebook in her handbook bag with a handwritten memo from the day she left Lima. Is it Lima or Lima? I never know that. Read quote, I dropped out of UCSB on Monday. Currently I am in Paraguay in South America, solo traveling for the first time. It's been amazing so far.

[Josh Arnold]

So cocaine and Parmesan cheese.

[Christy Lee]

So do you think she was there and she just got asked to do this as a mule.

[Tom Griswold]

Or there's a. There's a photograph of it, and it looks like a. A gigantic wheel of Parmesan cheese. But who. Who would travel with that?

[Christy Lee]

Well, maybe she didn't know what she was doing.

[Pat Godwin]

She knew what she was doing.

[Josh Arnold]

Coke and Parmesan. Great, great, great.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I get it. As in greater G, R, A, T, E. Yes. That would. Joke. Would have worked on paper.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't even think it would have worked there.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. I was being nice. If it was. If that paper was Readers Digest. Wait a week. We got a fresh new song.

[Pat Godwin]

I hope so. So we'd like to know where you got the cocaine.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, we'd like to know where.

[Christy Lee]

So far, not new.

[Pat Godwin]

You got the cocaine. There's coke and the cheese. Coke the cheese, man.

[Jeff Oskay]

Coke and the cheese.

[Jess Hooker]

No, no. You didn't even try.

[Josh Arnold]

I have a feeling someone made him do this.

[Christy Lee]

I did. You?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, I want to see if you know me on my. My love of hack premises. Now, can you take coke and the cheese and. And supply jokes?

[Pat Godwin]

I didn't. The beginning is always a setup.

[Tom Griswold]

I know.

[Josh Arnold]

We're waiting.

[Pat Godwin]

Do it all over again.

[Josh Arnold]

All right. All right. And we're going to be way into it.

[Tom Griswold]

Can we sing?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

So we like to do.

[Pat Godwin]

Well.

[Tom Griswold]

Nice cord.

[Pat Godwin]

You got cocaine. I'm going to kill you. You got the cocaine.

[Josh Arnold]

All right.

[Pat Godwin]

There's coke and cheese.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, wrong.

[Jeff Oskay]

My bad. I said boat.

[Tom Griswold]

CDG okay, you got a minor?

[Pat Godwin]

All right, Take number three. So we'd like to know where you got the cocaine.

[Tom Griswold]

We got that.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, we'd like to know.

[Tom Griswold]

Cocaine.

[Pat Godwin]

You got the cocaine, boy. That's coke and the cheese.

[Josh Arnold]

That's.

[Tom Griswold]

That's the wrong chord.

[Josh Arnold]

I know what's going wrong.

[Pat Godwin]

Do you think you're traveling with. Traveling with a wheel of Parmesan.

[Tom Griswold]

There we go.

[Pat Godwin]

How'd you fit it in your carrot?

[Josh Arnold]

Carry on.

[Pat Godwin]

Drug dogs are sniffing and they sneezed they'll be up for days now that ain't cheese. A half a gram of coke. £18 you could sneak on a plane open Not a wheel full of cocaine.

[Josh Arnold]

All right.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, we'd like to know where you got the cocaine.

[Tom Griswold]

Which to cheat.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, we got to know where you got the cocaine. I know what's going. Now coke and the cheese.

[Josh Arnold]

Cheese, baby.

[Pat Godwin]

Coke and cheese. I was in the wrong key. Now coke and the cheese. Now coke in the cheese. I was singing in D, but it's.

[Tom Griswold]

In C.

[Pat Godwin]

I didn't realize until I was teased. Oh, well, sometimes I do it in different Keys for the.

[Tom Griswold]

I love that song.

[Jess Hooker]

I had so much fun.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much.

[Josh Arnold]

Coke.

[Christy Lee]

We love you, Pat.

[Tom Griswold]

I suppose the cops have a sense of humor when they take the mug shot. Say cheese. Never mind.

[Jess Hooker]

Isn't it true, though, that cheese has an ingredient that's drug like that makes people feel euphoric?

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know.

[Jess Hooker]

I think so. That's why it's so popular.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, no. Last time I was at Olive Garden, I think the people next to me thought the cheese grater had coke in it because they just kept going, more, more, more. There was more cheese than salad.

[Christy Lee]

Yikes.

[Josh Arnold]

That's right.

[Jess Hooker]

They should.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, that was you.

[Tom Griswold]

My bad.

[Jess Hooker]

They should sell those graters at Olive Garden.

[Christy Lee]

By the way, there's an Olive Garden salad in there for somebody if they want to take it home. I had one extra, like a big one.

[Jess Hooker]

And you brought the mints?

[Christy Lee]

I did bring them in.

[Josh Arnold]

Is the dressing.

[Christy Lee]

Has the dressing as well.

[Tom Griswold]

Has the size of the pepper mill thing gone away in restaurants, I want the big grinder. There was a big five or six years ago, they'd have the. Like when they do a birthday, they get the whole crowd over. They'd have three guys haul over the pepper thing.

[Christy Lee]

It was as tall as I am. I mean, it's ridiculous.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, that's still happening. Okay, Time now to learn a little something from our show.

[Christy Lee]

History.

[Tom Griswold]

Today in History. Anyone? We have the music here.

[Josh Arnold]

All right, give me a second.

[Jeff Oskay]

You just changed topics there. How do you like that?

[Tom Griswold]

Told you five minutes ago. Born in 1750. Antonio Salieri. You know that?

[Pat Godwin]

Cocaine.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, we got it.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

I'm practicing for the next time I do this.

[Christy Lee]

Are you drinking? Are you gonna a song about Solier now?

[Pat Godwin]

No.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Famously played by F. Marie Abraham, who.

[Josh Arnold]

We talked to and he was so known Amadeus. I was very nervous and he turned.

[Pat Godwin]

Friend of the show.

[Tom Griswold]

Salieri. Most famous for writing a bad Yelp review of Mozart. Pissed him up, you know. This is Ms. Hooker. Born in 1774. Maryweather Lewis.

[Jess Hooker]

Merryweather. Lewis.

[Pat Godwin]

Lewis.

[Jess Hooker]

Was she hot?

[Josh Arnold]

That's Merrillweather. Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Merryweather. Yeah. So you know it's a dude.

[Jess Hooker]

Lewis and Clark.

[Christy Lee]

Is that what you said?

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. Very good.

[Christy Lee]

Thanks.

[Tom Griswold]

He developed the GPS natural. Take a left, turn a sack of Joe. Look for a. Look for a dog. Let's see now. Oh, happy birthday. Born in 1936. Robert Redford, great actor. If they made the movie in Decent Proposal today, how much. I mean, how much would he have to offer?

[Josh Arnold]

Good question. I'm gonna say at least 25 mil.

[Jess Hooker]

What was it in one one.

[Christy Lee]

$1 million.

[Jess Hooker]

I mean, I've never watched a movie.

[Josh Arnold]

It's. Okay.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, I know this is hack, but like $1 million to sleep with my wife. That's a pretty good.

[Jess Hooker]

It was his wife.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, it was his wife.

[Jeff Oskay]

That's. That's a pretty decent proposal. Well, that's kind of like a number eight at McDonald's.

[Josh Arnold]

That's an ind. But that's kind of the movie. It's. Why wouldn't we do this?

[Jeff Oskay]

It's a million.

[Josh Arnold]

This will change our lives.

[Pat Godwin]

I don't like that movie.

[Jeff Oskay]

They should have just called it Decent proposal or not a bad.

[Josh Arnold]

Pretty good deal.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, not a bad proposal.

[Christy Lee]

I know there are a lot of people that would still do it for a million bucks.

[Tom Griswold]

For those that haven't seen it, I forgot that. What's the exact premise?

[Josh Arnold]

Robert Redford offers Woody Harrelson and Demi Moore a million dollars if he can have one night with her.

[Jess Hooker]

See, I thought that it was Robert Redford's wife that he was offering a million dollars.

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

No.

[Jess Hooker]

Which also happens.

[Tom Griswold]

But see, this is. This is one of those movies that should have made into an actual TV game show.

[Jess Hooker]

That's disgusting.

[Josh Arnold]

It's so disgusting. I can't believe it didn't happen.

[Jess Hooker]

I know.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Wouldn't it be great? Like Howie Mandel is your host. All right, we've got a bid of 400,000 bucks. Will you let your wife sleep with and then they have a guest?

[Josh Arnold]

Why not even. You could even just have single women. How much to. Yeah, how much to be a whore? Who wants to be a whore?

[Jess Hooker]

Well, the only problem is, is that that's illegal.

[Josh Arnold]

It shouldn't be.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, see now you're not. You got to think out of the box. It's legal if we do it offshore.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh yeah, right, right, right.

[Jess Hooker]

I think people did it for concert tickets here.

[Josh Arnold]

Jeez, there's nothing safe with.

[Jess Hooker]

Hell no, it's not.

[Pat Godwin]

Peek under the sheets.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, that's absolutely true, by the way.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, Tom used to bang you.

[Pat Godwin]

Non stop banging.

[Tom Griswold]

Famous one was something. Nevermind. Born in 1952, a fine actor. Patrick Swayze. Anyone know his father? Of course. John Cameron Swayze.

[Jess Hooker]

What'd he do?

[Tom Griswold]

The Timex guy? I thought.

[Christy Lee]

I do.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm getting a wrong audience. Not related.

[Jess Hooker]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

Remember that show?

[Josh Arnold]

Of course.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, he go. They take a Timex watch and they strap it to the propeller of an Evinrude and drive it around. And it takes a looking and I.

[Christy Lee]

Still ticking Is that his dad? Really?

[Tom Griswold]

Of course not. I just. The name Swayze is so unusual.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

But I just love those commercials. We've taken this porn star, John C. Holmes and we've strapped this Timex and after banging. Who's a. Who's a porn star of that era.

[Josh Arnold]

Of the John C. Holmes era.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Don't you ever.

[Josh Arnold]

Maryland Chambers, maybe.

[Tom Griswold]

And strapped it to Maryland Chambers and it took a licking and. Tim. Okay, never mind. Patches for you and me. The beauty Beatles began their residence in Hamburg in 1960. On this date they had. They changed all the lyrics to their songs.

[Christy Lee]

Really?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. All I need is schnitzel.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I want to hold your Hans. Dude named Hans. Okay, sorry. It's time to hold your hands. Coming up, comedian Reno Collier. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Commercial Announcer]

For a complete copy of the Bob and Tom show contest rules, go to bobandtom.com or just scroll down to the bottom of the page and see contest rules. This is the Bob and Tom show.

[Josh Arnold]

Live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show. Christy Lee's at the Silac Insurance Company.

[Christy Lee]

That'd be me present.

[Josh Arnold]

Pat Godwin's there.

[Pat Godwin]

Hello.

[Josh Arnold]

Jess Hooker's there.

[Jess Hooker]

Hello.

[Josh Arnold]

And my gosh, if it ain't Jeff. Oscar.

[Jeff Oskay]

What's up buddy?

[Josh Arnold]

Ace Cowsby. How are you? Howdy. I'm Josh. Arnold. Arnold. And there's Tom and Tom. I believe we're joined by one of our good friends on the Zoomies.

[Christy Lee]

On the Zoomies?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, that's what they call it now.

[Christy Lee]

Oh really? My dogs have the Zoomies all the time.

[Tom Griswold]

Reno. Kyra, I'm gonna. I'm gonna buy that lamp from you, Reno. Just so I have the satisfaction of.

[Reno Collier]

Hitting my wife will kill me.

[Josh Arnold]

Hitting you with sledgehammer. I like that lamp.

[Jeff Oskay]

I like it.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Reno Collier]

What's the problem with it?

[Josh Arnold]

What's wrong?

[Christy Lee]

What is wrong with that lamp? There's nothing wrong with that.

[Tom Griswold]

Looks like it belongs in a cheap motor hotel. You know where they.

[Pat Godwin]

How do you know?

[Reno Collier]

That's not how I like my house. I've lived in them long enough. It's like home. I got a days. I got a days in phone over there too.

[Christy Lee]

There you go.

[Josh Arnold]

Does it have a lock on it?

[Christy Lee]

A little red light that lights up one of the.

[Tom Griswold]

One of the comedians. One of the comedians we know had his. At his house actually had a room that looked just like a hotel room room because he got so used to sleeping in them. You know what?

[Christy Lee]

My brother in law just did that he loved this hotel down in Florida, and he did his guest room exactly like one of the rooms there because it just reminds him of Florida. It's gorgeous. It's really pretty.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Well, now, Reno, do you ever take your. Your wife on these. These comedy trips that you do? Do you ever.

[Reno Collier]

Sometimes I'm taking her. I gotta go down to Florida. Florida for a month for a project, and she and the dog are coming with me.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Reno Collier]

So that'll be cool.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, man.

[Tom Griswold]

All right, all right.

[Josh Arnold]

It's all good.

[Tom Griswold]

So they'll. You'll be staying in a hotel then?

[Reno Collier]

No, they got us a house with a pool.

[Christy Lee]

Nice.

[Reno Collier]

And a dough. Yeah, it's kind of fun.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm getting the vibe that this means that your intimate activities will be ratcheted up, if you will, due to the location of the. Why?

[Reno Collier]

Because I have the dog.

[Jeff Oskay]

What are you talking about?

[Tom Griswold]

Never mind. You try sometimes you slow pitch them and they.

[Josh Arnold]

This is that secret, secret project.

[Reno Collier]

I'm. It is a secret project.

[Tom Griswold]

Does it involve. Does it involve television?

[Reno Collier]

It does. And it's a series and I don't have the money in my account and they asked me not to mention the network. I will tell you this. I found out I have to have my shirt off in it.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh.

[Reno Collier]

So I. I have not had sugar, break, bread, anything. I've got enough vitamin B12 and protein creatine running through. I could run through that freaking wall. I'm down £20. My head, I'm starting to look. I look like a bobblehead. Like, my head is huge. I have a huge Scottish head. And the more weight I lose and my calves already look like I just had cast taken off. So I got these skinny legs. It's like two toothpicks holding up a meatball. And I don't know, dude, fat is funny on teeth. TV good. Shape is good. That, in between, is gross.

[Tom Griswold]

When does the shirt come off? How much more time do we have here?

[Reno Collier]

I have a month and a week. And my buddy Tim Wilkins, who's a comedian and he hosts these Mr. Olympia things, he's got me on a diet and a workout regimen and. Dude, I've never had so much energy in my life. I don't know if it's good for me because I could stroke out at any second. I talk in my sleep. I can't stop talking.

[Josh Arnold]

Kill it.

[Pat Godwin]

So the diet is meth?

[Reno Collier]

Well, meth is a small part. It's not the meth diet. Like, my teeth are still in, but it is close.

[Tom Griswold]

So are you open for A six pack. Six pack abs. By the time this show films.

[Reno Collier]

I don't. I don't think I can ever get there. I think I can get. I get to where you can see them. My problem is, and it's hereditary, I've got this like. Like when you get in the pool, one of those floors floaties that goes around my waist. No matter how much weight I lose, there's still that little bit that I can't mash down into my pants and it kind of flops over the top.

[Christy Lee]

So I'm trying, baby.

[Tom Griswold]

So I have a. I know you can't discuss the nature of the program, but the fact that you have to disrobe.

[Reno Collier]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And the fact that it's in Florida would suggest there may be some kind.

[Josh Arnold]

Of gay porn.

[Reno Collier]

That didn't get enough money.

[Tom Griswold]

Dude. Some kind of marine. Like.

[Reno Collier]

It's actually not. So it's got.

[Jeff Oskay]

Reno is. Are they trying to make Jingle all the way 3 less family friendly having your shirtless in it.

[Reno Collier]

I gotta tell you, first of all, you know, it hurts me when you bring up my role in Jingle all the Way too. Because the academy just wiped right over the top.

[Josh Arnold]

It sure did.

[Jeff Oskay]

I. I'm sorry about that.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Reno Collier]

They're woke. That's why, you know, my performance was totally deserving of a trophy.

[Jeff Oskay]

I loved it.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you, bud.

[Reno Collier]

It's not Jingle all the Way three.

[Josh Arnold]

We were on the same page.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, now Reno, we got to squeeze in a little bit of. Do you have time to do a. A country? Okay, we're ready. Go ahead.

[Reno Collier]

And when you hear this, you'll understand why I'm rattled too. So last week I was out doing shows with cable guy and we were planning just like thousands of times to do the show, get in the car and head to the airport to fly back to Lincoln. Before the show. We checked the weather because Lincoln had 90 mile an hour winds the day before the storm we saw on our weather app looked like there were definitely going to be cows and probably some sharks flying around in it. And it started to flip us out.

[Tom Griswold]

Right.

[Reno Collier]

So Larry's buddy works at Fox weather headquarters. He calls him up. His buddy's exact words were, do not fly into Lincoln tonight. I don't even need to say that you're not getting in. So we go to the pilot, who is a nice gentleman from the Ukraine. We took the iPad to him to show him the weather that would be hitting us for our flight in. His response sounded like Drago from Rocky 4. Those maps are garbage.

[Tom Griswold]

We will be fine.

[Reno Collier]

Let's go to plane. As we drove over, Larry and I are trying to figure out the weather.

[Tom Griswold]

Weather map.

[Reno Collier]

Now that's a problem. First of all, Larry thinks Doppler is when you tackle a woman. And I giggle if the storm outline looks like a wiener.

[Tom Griswold]

We.

[Reno Collier]

We don't know anything. And we figured the pilot must know. He said he'd been there for 25 years. So we hop on the plane, and off we go. First hour. Great. Then it wasn't. It started to get bumpy. We looked at each other, and then wham. We dropped, and it felt like we hit the ground. I'm trying to listen to my headphones, but my damn playlist is all southern rock. It's like Skinner, Damn it. No, skip Stevie Ray Vaughan. You gotta be kidding me. I'll calm down with some John Denver.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh.

[Reno Collier]

Our problem was we were at 43,000ft, but the storm went up to 60. Up and down is one thing, but turning sideways in blind chaos at 40,000ft will dot the back of your drawers. The problem with a small plane is you see the pilots in the cockpit the entire flight. At one point, the dashboards lighting up like a Christmas tree with bells and alarms going off for good Christmas measure. Larry tries to get up there, to talk to him, to tell him to get out of the damn storm, but the pressure inside the plane had him on the floor. He's literally crawling where he came beside me, and he collapsed on his seat with his body hanging on it. And he. I'm like, dude, dude. He wasn't talking. Then he looks up at me and he goes, buddy, this is it, man. And that's when I started praying for my kids, for my wife, asking for forgiveness for all the jacked up stuff I've done to people.

[Josh Arnold]

What the.

[Christy Lee]

You're good. You're good.

[Reno Collier]

Okay, I'm sorry.

[Tom Griswold]

We can see you. Sorry.

[Jeff Oskay]

He got a text.

[Pat Godwin]

You're doing great.

[Reno Collier]

On the radio.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm on my phone.

[Pat Godwin]

Some of them.

[Reno Collier]

Some of the things I was praying for may not have even been my fault or even happened. But when you're settled on the fact that you're gonna die, you don't leave anything to chance. Then the pilot turns around and yells, we must divert. I'm glad Apollo Creek kicked your ass. We're still like a towel in the dryer, but whatever. All of a sudden, I look out the window.

[Tom Griswold]

Window.

[Reno Collier]

And I see flashing lights. As we get closer, I realize, oh, great, it's lightning. It looked like bombs going off all around us. And I'm Thinking, great, the Ukrainian jackass thinks we're flying into Kiev. I'm waiting for him to say, if we die, we die now. It actually got worse than that. But that's enough. Obviously, we made. Made it. But I gotta tell you, whether it happens or not, when you believe you're gonna die, you're gonna find Jesus and it'll shake you to your core. And I know a lot of people think that's voodoo Harry Potter mumbo jumbo, and I'm cool with that, too. To each their own. We're all trying to find our way. But I will say this. You never know your time, so keep your loose ends tied up as well as you can. Forgive easily. Tell people you love them and be kind. Kind. And you know what the worst part of all this is? If that plane would have crashed, the headline would have read, legendary comedian Larry the Cable Guy and his opener died in a plane. Even in death, that jackass beats me.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Reno Collier]

I'm Reno Collier, and that's my country fried take.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you, Reno.

[Josh Arnold]

All right.

[Christy Lee]

Glad you're okay. That is scary.

[Reno Collier]

It freaked me. I. I'm still jacked up.

[Josh Arnold]

Both. Both.

[Reno Collier]

When we got off the plane.

[Tom Griswold]

Plane.

[Reno Collier]

He was buying a bus.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I see. I see. Well, thank you.

[Reno Collier]

Yeah. And we're going to South Dakota the 29th, we're in Huron.

[Tom Griswold]

Hi, Bo.

[Reno Collier]

I love you, too, buddy. And 29th, we're in Huron, South Dakota. And then the 30th, we're in Deadwood.

[Josh Arnold]

Bose's landscaper.

[Christy Lee]

You're taking them?

[Tom Griswold]

We're driving.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Larry the Cable Guy in Reno. It's South Dakota, the 29th. It's a Friday. Saturday. Saturday, you're going to be in Deadwood. So you got some great shows coming up. Then we'll hear from you again soon. Good luck with whatever. The mystery show.

[Reno Collier]

It'll probably be November, but I love you guys and I will. I will talk to you then.

[Tom Griswold]

We want to see. All right, now, by the way, you said you have to lose a bunch of weight. Is it full frontal? You said you.

[Reno Collier]

Yeah, it's just me. It's frontal. I have pants on.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm.

[Reno Collier]

For God's sakes. I told the guy, I'm like, dude, I'm hung like a field mouse and a snow blizzard. Don't get weird.

[Tom Griswold]

We'll look forward to mocking it. I mean, now we've got Christy Lee over there at the Silic Insurance news desk. What's coming up?

[Christy Lee]

Coming up, we have robots in the news. We have Walk Faster, Live Longer. And I don't know if you heard about this, but a woman may or may not have won the Python challenge.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, no kidding. Good for her.

[Tom Griswold]

We got a lady that another one of these cases. She liked a snake, sat down for a, sat down for a number two.

[Christy Lee]

Okay. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And turned out she had, she had a child number three. We'll find out about the little feller when we return. I want to remind you right now about those great earbuds from Raycon. They got something new. Raycon earbuds have made the better part of. Let's see, they've made the best ones even better. That's what I meant to say. So what I'm talking about are the classic everyday earbuds from Raycon. They've added a little something. It's called active noise cancellation. This is the latest version of Raycon's Everyday Earbud Classics. And, and they're available now. They just came out with them. They of course have the standard 8 hours of playtime, 32 hour battery life from Raycon. And so the Raycons are going to last a long time. They're about half the price of those little white ones you see all over the place. And the Raycons aren't going to fall out of your ears. Great audio quality. I also love the Raycon regular headphones. I've said this before. I get them for my girls when we travel. Very, very convenient. Convenient. They can play their games and watch their movies in complete silence. Ah, there's nothing better than that. Thank you, raycon. Go to raycon.com tom and get 20% off the fan favorite, the Everyday Earbuds that's happening today. Buyraycon.com Tom, save 20% on the already low price of Raycon earbuds. Raycon, 20% off today. Everyday Earbuds, the classics go to buy Rayk. Raycon.com Tom coming up, before you flush, take a quick look. There might be a baby in there. We'll find out the details. From the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey, it's the Bob and Tom show live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Christy Lee's here. Hi, Pat Godwin's there. Hello. Hi, Jess Hooker.

[Jess Hooker]

Hi, Josh Arnold.

[Josh Arnold]

Jeff Oskay across the way, saluting me. There's Ace Cosby.

[Tom Griswold]

Howdy.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm Josh Arnold and there's Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much. We're going to check in with Christy Lee. She is at the Silac Insurance news desk. I'm trying to check Something we were talking about Reno Collier on the road and how he is so used to staying in hotel rooms.

[Christy Lee]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

That sometimes people do their. They'll do the room at their house like a hotel room. You know, mentioned that y. Ray Charles. This may be anecdote. I don't know. Maybe fake. Who knows. Apparently Ray Charles said that he always stayed on Holiday Inns because the rooms were all the same and he could find his way around and didn't have to relearn each room.

[Josh Arnold]

That sounds like a. Sounds legit to me. Right.

[Tom Griswold]

So I'm not sure I remember hearing about that. It could just be apocryphal. Who's to say Right now we're going to check in with Christy Lee. She's at the SILAC insurance news desk.

[Christy Lee]

Well, speaking of hotel rooms, a woman on vacation said she had no idea she was pregnant until she gave birth on the toilet.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, she must be a fatty. Fat fat.

[Christy Lee]

Helen Green was vacationing in Toronto with her husband Michael and their daughter when she suddenly awoke in the night with stomach pains and ran to the bathroom. Mrs. Green told SWNS. I had no idea what was happening. My body just took over after two massive pushes. There was about baby all right. So I picked her up out of the toilet and held her in my arms. Mrs. Green said she had no symptoms during the pregnancy adding everything seemed completely normal.

[Josh Arnold]

That's a baby you know is just going to have Mountain Dew in its bottle.

[Jeff Oskay]

Who's our new baby? Kohler.

[Tom Griswold]

What was the dad's name? Does it say?

[Christy Lee]

I don't think so.

[Jess Hooker]

Mr. Green.

[Christy Lee]

Mr. Green. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, okay.

[Christy Lee]

No, Michael. His name was Michael.

[Tom Griswold]

Michael Green. So the baby will be Michael Green. The turd.

[Christy Lee]

The girl. Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I wasn't. I wasn't paying attention. Ah. Wow.

[Jess Hooker]

I don't know how that happens there. I mean there used to be a whole TLC program I didn't know I.

[Josh Arnold]

Was pregnant called I crapped a baby.

[Christy Lee]

I crapped.

[Josh Arnold]

We.

[Tom Griswold]

We call that a two for one. So special.

[Christy Lee]

There are way. I mean there's. Some women do still have periods and spot and I mean pretty amazing.

[Jess Hooker]

That's crazy.

[Tom Griswold]

Either we had another baby or that turds crying. What do you think there Michael?

[Christy Lee]

Oh my God.

[Josh Arnold]

Or riding. Dad's trying to ignore all this.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah should. Do you have a song?

[Pat Godwin]

I did but I'm not. I'm just let me look ahead first.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Well we got the. We got the birth and the baptism out of the way in one big pull bush.

[Pat Godwin]

You're crapping my baby. I Think.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Jess Hooker]

Baby in the toilet. Baby in the toilet. Baby in the toilet.

[Josh Arnold]

All that she craps is another baby. Boy, oh boy. Well, I. I wish them all the best.

[Christy Lee]

Me too.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

A woman.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, go ahead. You. You got it.

[Christy Lee]

A woman from Florida has won the 2025 Florida Python Challenge.

[Josh Arnold]

Nice.

[Christy Lee]

The Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission said this year's contest saw 34 participants from 30 states and Canada, removing a record 294 invasive Burmese pythons from South Florida.

[Josh Arnold]

Well done, Everybody.

[Tom Griswold]

This is 934participants.

[Christy Lee]

Sorry.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, okay.

[Christy Lee]

Mine. Oh, mine was.

[Jeff Oskay]

I was gonna say 34 and 30 were from out of state. People in Florida are like, I ain't messing with those things.

[Christy Lee]

You know why? Because my cursor was on top of the nine. It's so. It looked like it was gone. Taylor Stanberry won the ultimate grand prize of $10,000.

[Josh Arnold]

The Stanberrys taste like Stanberry.

[Christy Lee]

You're catching a total of 60 pythons. She's only 4 foot 11.

[Josh Arnold]

Holy cow.

[Christy Lee]

4 foot 11. Shorter than even me.

[Josh Arnold]

A little spark plug, huh?

[Christy Lee]

29 year old, the first woman to win the grand prize since the competition began in 2013.

[Josh Arnold]

Hell yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Good for her, man. There she is.

[Josh Arnold]

That's awesome.

[Tom Griswold]

Very pretty.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah. But you are going to measure up to what she's used to handling.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, no kidding.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, I guess I'll call you Garter.

[Jess Hooker]

Nice.

[Jeff Oskay]

Wow, that snake is huge.

[Tom Griswold]

What do they. What do they do with them?

[Josh Arnold]

They kill them.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, they kill them.

[Josh Arnold]

They claim. In a humane way and then they. I think they do.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

And their meat and something.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but isn't this a drop in the bucket?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, but. But a good drop in the bucket.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. I mean, there's still females that aren't going to have more babies.

[Tom Griswold]

Exactly.

[Josh Arnold]

I mean, that would be.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. I mean, they can have tens of.

[Tom Griswold]

Thousands, thousands of them.

[Jess Hooker]

Can they really?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Not tens of thousands of babies per.

[Tom Griswold]

Se, but there are tens of thousands of these snakes.

[Josh Arnold]

But they would have a ton of babies.

[Jess Hooker]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Michael Morawski, a novice catcher, got the longest one. 15ft 11 inches.

[Josh Arnold]

I didn't know they had a novice problem too.

[Christy Lee]

Well, professional. Kenneth Chamberlain bagged a 9 foot 8 inch long snake. Yeah. They have a professional category and a novice category.

[Josh Arnold]

Men, women, these guys won't. Will you do it, Jeff?

[Jeff Oskay]

I'll do it with you.

[Josh Arnold]

All right, let's do it.

[Tom Griswold]

You'll do it?

[Josh Arnold]

Yes. Yeah. I've been saying it for the last three years. I'll do it.

[Christy Lee]

How would you bag a snake Would you. How do you do this? Do you shoot them?

[Josh Arnold]

I wouldn't do what you were about to say.

[Pat Godwin]

Now, do you bag or plastic? What do you do?

[Tom Griswold]

Plastic. Do you have to do it at night?

[Christy Lee]

Do you have to?

[Josh Arnold]

I think you can. I think it is primarily at night, but I. You can do it during the day too, I'm sure.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, but you don't.

[Tom Griswold]

You.

[Christy Lee]

Can you kill them or do they have to?

[Josh Arnold]

No, I think you take them in. Yeah. Live cats, you get these big sacks that are real thick and you. I don't know if you have little rope, like what are those things? Like little collar deals or if you just grab them and put them in there, but you grab by the back of the head.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

I mean, I'm going to get. We'll get bitten.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

But hey, that's what I want to hear the stats on is, you know, novice Jeff Oscar, bit five times in the face, zero snakes caught.

[Jess Hooker]

Have you owned a snake before, Jeff?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

You have?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, you can tell he's snake guy. You can tell?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, Jeff and I.

[Christy Lee]

You can tell he's snake guy.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, he was. He had a snake face. I had a snake face.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, my God.

[Josh Arnold]

I'd get another one if I didn't have cats.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And a desire to someday meet a woman.

[Josh Arnold]

There's clearly snake ladies out there. One. Just one.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

She was hot again.

[Tom Griswold]

How'd you get the nickname Garter? Funny you should ask. Do you. Aren't there alligators in there too, though?

[Josh Arnold]

That's what I'm most worried about. Yeah, I didn't think about that.

[Tom Griswold]

Is as you hold the snake up, the gator tears, pulls you down under and flips around four times.

[Jess Hooker]

I think the bigger concern is Florida, man. They're everywhere.

[Pat Godwin]

No joke.

[Josh Arnold]

Good point. Oh, we're doing it next summer. We're doing it. Okay.

[Christy Lee]

It looks like they use long hooks.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, yeah, that makes sense.

[Josh Arnold]

So.

[Christy Lee]

And a lot of these, the woman admits, she goes, I got a lot of babies because she'd get a nest and she'd get the little two footers.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah, yeah. But still.

[Pat Godwin]

So these are pets that got let go initially.

[Tom Griswold]

Initially, not all.

[Josh Arnold]

Now a lot of them are breeding. Yeah. Okay, so.

[Tom Griswold]

And there's. They have no natural predators, so they're killing everything else.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, they got a natural.

[Jess Hooker]

What could you use a baby snake.

[Pat Godwin]

Skin for Jeff and Josh.

[Christy Lee]

There you go. Here's your hot condoms.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, that. Boy, that's a big snake.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, it is. She's got big boobs, too.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Yeah, yeah. She's got two big boobs. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, wait, what's going.

[Jeff Oskay]

How's that over here?

[Josh Arnold]

Don't bow guard those boobs.

[Tom Griswold]

She's also 411, so.

[Jeff Oskay]

Dude, she's just holding it around her like she's Britney Spears on a bender.

[Josh Arnold]

You know who's going to be mad when you and I do it? Jeff is Noah from our staff who has to videotape it. What the hell am I doing out here?

[Jess Hooker]

You guys might have GoPros.

[Pat Godwin]

Strapped to your heads.

[Christy Lee]

Wow.

[Josh Arnold]

Would you ever stop laughing if you saw me get bit in the face?

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, I would you.

[Pat Godwin]

I laugh when you fall on the lake all the time.

[Jeff Oskay]

That was funny.

[Tom Griswold]

Do they. When they bite you in the face and. Is that when they wrap around you and squeeze you to death?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Do they squeeze you.

[Josh Arnold]

They are constrictors.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

So how do you get them off?

[Josh Arnold]

Well, first I take them to dinner. You just. You try to buy them. I don't know if you're really in danger. I don't know how you get one off.

[Jess Hooker]

Cut it, I guess.

[Tom Griswold]

Chainsaw.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, you might have the machete. A python for my head.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, I'm.

[Jeff Oskay]

You're just making it better every time.

[Pat Godwin]

I'm so in now. You know this is never going to happen. You guys are going to.

[Josh Arnold]

No, I think it is.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, you think it is?

[Josh Arnold]

I mean, I really am am in. I really will do it.

[Christy Lee]

Chick says he's in, but.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, no, no, not me either.

[Tom Griswold]

No way.

[Josh Arnold]

If Chick buys tickets to a concert and then actually goes to that concert, maybe I'll think he's in for this.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Yeah. Okay. We have to do the naked motorcycle story for Ms. Hooker. Motorcycle enthusiast.

[Christy Lee]

Authorities in Malta find a 26 year old tourist who drove a motorcycle around wearing nothing but his birthday. Birthday suit. According to Times of Malta, Mr. Amini L. McAfee, a German national, was vacationing in Malta when he was caught on video writing German.

[Tom Griswold]

So he automatically had a helmet. His dad's name, silly.

[Josh Arnold]

Do you have. Do you have a helmet, sir? My father.

[Tom Griswold]

First time you saw someone named Helmet, didn't you think it was hilarious?

[Josh Arnold]

I do like it. Yes, Very much.

[Christy Lee]

Caught on video riding a rented motorcycle naked through peaks. Mr. McAlfee's defense lawyer told a Malta court that he was apologetic for his behavior, but he was found guilty anyway of negligent driving, fined nearly fourteen hundred dollars and disqualified from having a driving license for six months.

[Tom Griswold]

Now the official spokesman for Maltese Acid.

[Josh Arnold]

Who gets.

[Tom Griswold]

Who gets on a motorcycle Naked. How high do you have to be, man, this looks like a good idea. And you mentioned the possibility of road ration. What would it take too?

[Josh Arnold]

Josh, eraser your penis off.

[Jess Hooker]

That is a pain like no other.

[Josh Arnold]

Having your penis erased off.

[Jess Hooker]

I was gonna say road rash from a.

[Tom Griswold]

Have you ever dropped your bike? Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, I've laid it down a couple of times.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I've always heard that. Motorcycle, I should say. I've always heard this. My buddy, when he bought a motorcycle, the salesman told him when you lay this down, not if.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, there are two. Two riders. Riders who have laid their bikes down and those who haven't yet.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, man.

[Pat Godwin]

So the effects of scratches, what do you do?

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, you can have them buffed out and do it. Yeah, yeah. I mean that's really not the big concern.

[Tom Griswold]

When you lay your bike down, it's replacing the leg.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

Or the muscles in your leg.

[Christy Lee]

Police are testing life size holographic officers as a new way to discourage crime in South Korea.

[Tom Griswold]

That'll help.

[Christy Lee]

Every evening between 7 and 10pm a uniformed hologram officer standing about five and a half feet. Doll, halt.

[Tom Griswold]

Or. Or we'll dissolve.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, we can't chase you or anything.

[Christy Lee]

But it appears in Judong Number 3 Park, a busy district of the capital. The high tech 3D projection is intended to provide psychological stability to citizens while deterring disorderly conduct.

[Josh Arnold]

I kind of get this.

[Tom Griswold]

What do you mean?

[Christy Lee]

Well, you lived in South Korea, so you.

[Josh Arnold]

Have you ever seen a police officer standing on the side of the road with a radar gun? Psychologically, you think, yeah, it's a gun.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

So just. That sight has scared me before.

[Jess Hooker]

I think it's. It's the equivalent of them parking cars, police cars, places, and they just sit there.

[Tom Griswold]

But everyone's going to know that it's not a real cop though. They're going to know.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, but in your brain you see the cop car, you naturally slow down.

[Josh Arnold]

Right.

[Jess Hooker]

So like. And I think those people are way more scared over there of their government than we are.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, that could. Your take on that, Josh, you lived.

[Josh Arnold]

In South Korea is pretty free. So. So yeah, they're not too concerned.

[Jess Hooker]

Okay.

[Jeff Oskay]

Is there a lot of crime in South Korea?

[Jess Hooker]

You know, that's a good point.

[Josh Arnold]

Nothing crazy when I was there, but it, but it was 20 years ago, so.

[Tom Griswold]

K Pop.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, that's. Sure. Yeah, yeah. Arrest BTS before you do anything.

[Christy Lee]

Hey, don't tell my kids that.

[Josh Arnold]

I'll tell your kids what a.

[Pat Godwin]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, the Bob and Tom show is brought to you by the Silac Insurance Company. Chris Lee, of course, at the SILAC news desk.

[Christy Lee]

Proud to be here.

[Tom Griswold]

Time now for that special Christy Lee quiz. You've been hearing about Silac Annuities from us for quite a while. And what they're all about, of course, is providing you with some funds. When it's time to retire, we're gonna do the Christy Lee Three three questions. These are FAQ frequently Asked questions about silac. Question number one. Dear Christy Lee, I wanna browse and read about all the Silac annuities choices. What is the SILAC address for the SILAC website?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, it's so simple. It's Silac ins dot com. That's s I l a c I n s dot com.

[Tom Griswold]

Very good. You got the first one right. Question two. Christy Lee, I love the idea of getting a 20% bonus by going from a 401k to a Silac annuity. What is the phone number for that?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, that's real easy. All you have to do is dial pound 250 on your cell and say bonus 20. That number again. Pound 250. And then say bonus 20.

[Tom Griswold]

Last question, Ms. Lee. Would it be too much to ask for you to please read the Silac Insurance Company disclaimer?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, Tom, I'd be happy to consult your financial advisor. Premium bonus may vary by annuity product, premium band and surrender charge period selected and may be subject to a premium bonus. Recapture. Some products with bonuses may offer lower growth rates or caps, terms and conditions of supply. See silacins.com disclosures.

[Tom Griswold]

We got more robots in the news. Got a lot of robot stuff lately. Last week we got a huge laugh out of the giant robot competition in China.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, my gosh.

[Tom Griswold]

The humanoid. Humanoid robots. And they were. They were doing athletic events. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Boxing.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. The swimming was brief.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, a lot of.

[Tom Griswold]

A lot of sparking. We'll find out what the latest is in robot technology when we come Back to the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Commercial Announcer]

Hey, thanks for listening this morning. Got something to say? Send us an email. Bob and Tom. Bob and Tom Dot com.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey, it's the Bob and Tom show live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Hope you're having a great day. There's Christy Lee. Hello, Pat Godwin's there?

[Pat Godwin]

Hello, Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

Jess Hooker's a doodling away.

[Jess Hooker]

Hello, Jeff Otto.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey, man, looking handsome as ever. As is Ace Constantin. Thank you. I'm Josh Arnold. There's Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much. We were talking about this thing in South Korea.

[Christy Lee]

You're done. They're done.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, you're gonna say something.

[Josh Arnold]

I was just gonna say you're a dream boat.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, thank you very much. I appreciate it. This thing in South Korea where they have. They're gonna put hologram police 3D hologram, cops in the park.

[Jess Hooker]

Hologram, Hologram.

[Tom Griswold]

Hologram. Hologram. I don't know.

[Jess Hooker]

A hologram would be a whole nother thing.

[Tom Griswold]

They can't do much. No, they can't talk or anything. They just.

[Pat Godwin]

A whole gram is like 100 bucks. Half a gram.

[Tom Griswold]

Got this letter, friend of the show, Chris Spirer, comedian. He owned an old police cruiser. He'd sit in the car pointing hair dryer at cars as they went by.

[Pat Godwin]

That's absolutely true. He does have a police car.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, clammy.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I think Dave Thomas, the actor and comedian is a big fan of the. The Crown Vic.

[Christy Lee]

Yes, I chick had a Crown Vic at one time. Oh, no kidding. Didn't he? Didn't he have an old police car? I'm pretty sure.

[Tom Griswold]

Cool, cool. It's a time to check in very quickly with Christy Lee. She's at the SILAC insurance news desk. What's happening?

[Christy Lee]

China. Turning to robotics to protect endangered Tibetan antelope, authorities have deployed a lifelike robot antelope in Tibet. Designed by the Chinese Academy of Sciences and Deep Robotics, the machine is covered in fur, equipped with 5G connectivity and AI vision systems allowing scientists to monitor the migration, feeding and mating habits of the herds in real time.

[Tom Griswold]

Have you seen a picture of this thing? It looks like the, like the Rudolph the red nosed reindeer root. It kind of looks like one of those claymation rope.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh.

[Tom Griswold]

But it's actually pretty cool. Cool.

[Christy Lee]

Tibetan antelope were nearly wiped out in the late 20th century by poachers targeting their ultra soft fleece used in chatouche Shaws and can sell for more than $20,000 each. The robot can handle rocky terrain, freezing conditions and mud. But its range is limited to just over a mile.

[Josh Arnold]

$20,000.

[Christy Lee]

How they re.

[Jeff Oskay]

How they recharge it, that's for just their fur. 20,000?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

What's that robot cost? 500,000 probably.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, the idea is to preserve the species.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I'd say preserve that species. So we can keep making $20,000 off their skin. Yeah. Are you kidding me?

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

That's worth wiping out an animal, isn't it? No, that's a lot of money. We have plenty of other antelopes and animals.

[Tom Griswold]

No, this is a Different. This is a very special kind of animal.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. $20,000.

[Tom Griswold]

I guess. They say you can tell which one is the fake one because it's the one walking around trying to find really good WI fi. So it can keep. Yeah, we had a picture of it. It looked. There it is.

[Josh Arnold]

Right.

[Christy Lee]

But like, pretty real.

[Reno Collier]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, but doesn't it kind of look like the Rudolph in the claymation cartoon Kinda?

[Jeff Oskay]

It looks real enough that poachers are gonna shoot at it, which is gonna cost a lot more than 20.

[Tom Griswold]

That's why they want to put laser eyes in it. So when the. It shoots back, then. Then you got something going on.

[Josh Arnold]

Don't shoot at the one that's pooping batteries.

[Pat Godwin]

Looks like the legs are on backwards, doesn't it?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, but I mean, that's what probably. Yeah, it does.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. It looks like it's a dog halfway through the great event. Okay, now, Pat, you said you got a song for us.

[Pat Godwin]

I had a song about. That would be relatable. The woman who gave birth. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

On the toy.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Probably a larger woman.

[Tom Griswold]

She.

[Jess Hooker]

That's an assumption.

[Christy Lee]

You guys are assum.

[Josh Arnold]

What thin person sits down and has a baby?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, she thought she was. She thought she was going to defecate and she actually pooped out a kid.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Had to be fat.

[Jess Hooker]

She didn't poop out a kid.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, I mean, she.

[Jeff Oskay]

There could have been some terror in the word of.

[Tom Griswold]

In the. In the words of the famous golf joke in Japan. Sorry, wrong hole.

[Pat Godwin]

They call me fatty fatty two by four and that's how they fat shame but not many people know just how I got my name oh, I'm a big man and my wife's a big gal too we have big children born big then they grew we want a bigger family but what's a big guy to do? I can barely find my junk and my wife down there is huge way Take a two by four by the bedroom door it's time to make the baby Strap it to my ass start pumping fast when it's time to make the baby oh, we're not thin and it keeps me in this sturdy wood that saves me there's a 2x4 by the bedroom door when it's time to make the baby when it's baby making timey in the Mrs. Have a system after many failed attempts with trial comes wisdom I'm so flabby I need some back support so I bought some strong pine lumber from the local hardware store way hey hey 2x4 by the bedroom door when it's time to make the baby. Neighbors come over and hold up the blubber. When it's time to make the baby. The wood is hard holds back the lard. When we need that baby gravy. We have six kids and we want one more. That's why they call me Fatty. Fatty two by four. See, it relates to the. Yeah, I did the woman.

[Christy Lee]

I mean, this lady is not that big.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, you have a picture.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I mean, she just had a baby, too. So you see the picture. She's not like what you would think at all.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, let me see.

[Jeff Oskay]

I want to see this.

[Jess Hooker]

Let me see.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, when. When you were pregnant, were you fully aware that you were pregnant, Christy?

[Christy Lee]

Well, she ain't skinny. Yeah, she's not skinny, but she's not what you guys are like envisioning.

[Jeff Oskay]

She had a baby inside of her and didn't know it. She's big.

[Christy Lee]

There are women who.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, there are also women that are really, really stupid.

[Christy Lee]

And there are women who only gain cyber. There are women who only gave. Gained 5 or 10 pounds and don't know. They think it does.

[Tom Griswold]

She had a. A boy or a girl?

[Christy Lee]

She had a girl. Olivia is her name.

[Tom Griswold]

That was the gender reveal. That's either a boy, a girl, or a seven pound turd.

[Jess Hooker]

Does it say the size of the baby?

[Christy Lee]

No, I. Seven pound turd, apparently seven pounds.

[Tom Griswold]

Was it really?

[Christy Lee]

No. I don't know.

[Jess Hooker]

She's very tall.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know. She's big enough. That pictures her at a baseball game, right?

[Jess Hooker]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, they were at a.

[Josh Arnold]

She's big enough that if she's standing there holding a baby and nachos and a foul ball comes her way, she's dropping the baby.

[Tom Griswold]

That's a good way to describe.

[Christy Lee]

Sorry, Mrs. Green, I don't think you look that big, but somehow I don't.

[Josh Arnold]

Think you look that big is worse.

[Paul Thorne]

Than anything I've said.

[Pat Godwin]

I'm sorry.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, what else you got, Christy?

[Christy Lee]

Well, new research shows that walking for just 15 minutes a day can extend your life. Scientists analyzed Data from nearly 80,000 participants found people who walked briskly for at least 15 minutes and daily reduced their overall risk of death by almost 20%.

[Josh Arnold]

Don't care. Not doing it.

[Christy Lee]

The benefit was most pronounced for cardiovascular disease, though the protective effect extended to all causes of death.

[Tom Griswold]

Especially if you're walking to a booty call. Josh, a little action in the other room. I don't know.

[Jess Hooker]

If you set up a booty call and he walks to your house.

[Tom Griswold]

It'S worth it.

[Josh Arnold]

I was Just if I know booty calls, come to me. All right?

[Jess Hooker]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm not into them. You get the. You get the text dtf if you're coming here, you. I ain't walking.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, that's good to know. I mean, we all know walking is great for you.

[Christy Lee]

Sure.

[Jeff Oskay]

I always walk the fastest. That way I get the first chance of the fresh bourbon chicken in the morning. I always like that sample.

[Tom Griswold]

So walking's good for that. It's about time we established that. Unless you're walking with a cigarette, that's a push. Yeah. Okay. Does that even out, though? Can you. Can you do both? I don't know. All right, now, we'd love to hear from you. You can reach us, Bob and tomobandtom.com.

[Josh Arnold]

Or you can leave us alone.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much. We'd appreciate it if you didn't do that. We'd love to hear from. From you.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, by the way, will walking backwards make you younger?

[Jess Hooker]

I just did that last night. I read about this about walking backwards, and so I tried it for like a quarter of a mile and I got dizzy.

[Josh Arnold]

And I think it does make you younger. You don't look a day over 54.

[Pat Godwin]

So it's like a time machine.

[Jess Hooker]

Perfect.

[Pat Godwin]

It's a walking time machine.

[Tom Griswold]

It is whatever doesn't make you look.

[Jeff Oskay]

Younger, but it makes you look crazier to all the neighbors.

[Tom Griswold]

Were you holding up a mirror? How'd you do it?

[Jess Hooker]

No, I just stayed near that. I stayed near the edge of the path and I just followed the path where the grass and the. The in the path meet.

[Josh Arnold]

It is, like, good for you to change it up.

[Jess Hooker]

It is.

[Josh Arnold]

That's what they say, but it is insane.

[Jess Hooker]

You look crazy. Yeah, no, I did it on the stretch of path where there were no houses or cars. It was just the wooded area, so I was.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, cool. Weren't you concerned you'd, like, walk into a bus?

[Jess Hooker]

She just said it was on a walking path.

[Pat Godwin]

It wasn't a bus in the woods.

[Jess Hooker]

I was on a walking path.

[Tom Griswold]

Nice neighborhood. These are the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Commercial Announcer]

Hey, thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom show this morning. Get a look at today's show on our YouTube channel.

[Josh Arnold]

It.

[Tom Griswold]

Drinking and driving will change your whole world. The next time you're out with your friends, consider what would happen if you got pulled over after drinking. Like the legal fees, the time in court, or a DUI on your record. Your decision to drink and drive could change someone else's world too if you hurt them or even kill them in a crash instead. What if your decision to call a sober ride changed your world for the better? Drive sober or get pulled over paid for by NHTSA.