
The BOB & TOM Show - December 24, 2024
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Tom Griswold
This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you ever think about switching insurance companies to see if you could save some cash? Progressive makes it easy to see if you could save when you bundle your home and auto policies. Try it@progressive.com Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. Potential savings will vary. Not available in all states.
Chick McGee
Ladies and gentlemen, my name is Dick Mango. I'm driving down the highway. Thank you, ladies and gentlemen. Some guy's in front of me oh yeah. The speed limit is 60 he's going 23 he's older than a fossil I hope he doesn't crash he's sitting on two phone books to see over the.
Christy Lee
Dash he's snail man, snail man, snail man, snail man.
Chick McGee
Now I'm behind the hoopty this driver's really stoned he's listening to Snoop Dogg and talking on the ph.
Christy Lee
He'S driving.
Chick McGee
Really slow I wish I could get by I'm sucking up his reefer I've got a contact high he was smoking a dooby dooby doo If I had a big bazooka I would blow him off the road. If my car was a steamroller would squish him like a to.
Josh Arnold
I think I just blew out a testicle.
Chick McGee
We just left a big party Now I'm driving really slow. Cause I picked up this hot chick and she is good to go. She's reaching for my stitch shift but she's not switching gears. She flashes me a smile and her head disappears. I'm stale man, stale man, baby stale man, stale man.
Christy Lee
We got our hands on 10 and.
Chick McGee
Two hers on my 10, mine on her too. Said 10 and a half but I don't want to brag. Thank you, ladies and gentlemen, my name is Dick Mango.
Christy Lee
Good morning.
Tom Griswold
Hello.
Christy Lee
From coast to coast, it's the Bob and Tom Show. Bob and Tom, Bob and Tom. Bob and Tom. Many portions of the upcoming program have been pre recorded, meaning they've already happened and they're about to happen again. So where was it? Oh. Oh, yeah. Ladies and gentlemen, we're glad to have you here. It's the Bob and Tom show and here's Tom Griswold with our special guest.
Chick McGee
We welcome comedian Ryan Singer into the studio. Ryan, it's always a pleasure to see you.
Christy Lee
Hey.
Chick McGee
Morning. I love, I love being here. Thanks for having me. Kind of a D'Artagnan facial hair thing going. Yeah, I. I got my travel stash.
Josh Arnold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
You know when you're trying, when you're driving across. I just drove across the country and so I was like, you Know what? I don't like to be messed with my Sam Elliot stash. So, yeah, I go to stash mode when I'm spending. You have the stash and the so called soul patch. Yeah, the soul patch I do have. You know, I try to, you know, I'm trying to have a little bit of soul, you know? You know, I'm just. You know, I'm getting older, so I'm just trying to lean into my soul. I associate that with. With the Three musketeers. Oh, that particular brand of facial hair, you know, D'Artagnan. When you first said D'Artagnan, I was thinking, like, oh, is that like a morning blend?
Christy Lee
Oh, nice.
Chick McGee
A nice cup of D'Artagnan in the morning.
Josh Arnold
D'Artagnan was the queen in Game of Thrones. I could be wrong, though.
Chick McGee
What?
Christy Lee
No.
Josh Arnold
Well, God, now. Now I'm thinking about all the different.
Chick McGee
Names of all the different Viking shows I watched during the pandemic and all the. I was binging so many Viking shows. And so now, like, before I go to sleep, I'm just like, dear Odin.
Christy Lee
Welcome me to Valhalla.
Chick McGee
You know it's Valhalla.
Josh Arnold
Yeah.
Christy Lee
Earlier this morning, we were talking about a world record. Tom, an Iowa man, was hoping to break the Guinness World Record for the largest collection of pencils.
Tom Griswold
Right.
Christy Lee
You remember this?
Tom Griswold
Sure.
Christy Lee
Fascinating.
Chick McGee
Can any of them be duplicates? That's my question.
Christy Lee
Well, we don't know the answer to that, but thank you for asking. And Aaron Bartholomey of Colfax says he owns over 70,000 pencils. And then you added, Tom, that you just went out and purchased, what?
Chick McGee
Yesterday, A pencil sharpener.
Christy Lee
Congratulations. That's great. This is from Kelly. Good morning, everybody. I've listened to your show every morning for the past 30 years.
Tom Griswold
Oh, you deserve an award.
Christy Lee
Big fan of all of you. My girlfriends and I took a long weekend and got a cabin in Hocking Hills, Ohio, where my girlfriend discovered there's a pencil sharpener museum.
Josh Arnold
Is that right?
Christy Lee
She informed us that we were going there in the morning. We kind of heard her say it, but didn't think anything of it. The next morning came and she was ready to go. After a night of drinking and partying. Ready at 9am I asked if she's serious about the pencil sharp. Yes, I'm serious, she said. So we went, and it's an hour of my life I'll never get back.
Josh Arnold
And she led them there.
Christy Lee
I thought since y'all love pencils, you might led them there. Check out the pencil partner go to the pencil sharpening museum.
Chick McGee
It is a real thing, and it's the size of a portalette.
Josh Arnold
Well, I can only imagine.
Chick McGee
No, it's. It's a hut. It's the size of a one car garage. But it does have an air conditioner sticking out the window.
Tom Griswold
How many kinds of pencil sharpeners are there?
Christy Lee
It has a website.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Josh Arnold
Is it a. What do they call those buildings that look like what they are? You know what I mean? Like they.
Chick McGee
Oh, no, it's not. But I know what you're talking about.
Josh Arnold
Yes.
Chick McGee
Like a donut shop. That's a big donut.
Josh Arnold
Exactly. Yeah. There was the.
Chick McGee
What was it? Long and burger basket.
Christy Lee
Homonym. Homonyms.
Josh Arnold
Is that what it is? Okay, thank you.
Chick McGee
Yes, but Pencil sharpener museum. Wow. That. You got shelves full of pencil sharpeners.
Josh Arnold
All right.
Christy Lee
They were on a girls week.
Tom Griswold
I think I have a pencil in my house.
Josh Arnold
You don't?
Christy Lee
I have pencils, but I sure don't have a sharpener.
Josh Arnold
Oh, you gotta have a sharpener. You have pencils.
Christy Lee
I have many, many pencils.
Josh Arnold
Ryan, are you a pencil?
Chick McGee
You know, I love the crank. I love the wall crank.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, of course.
Josh Arnold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
That was the best way to just disrupt class as a kid.
Josh Arnold
And if you're really lucky, you got to empty. Empty it.
Christy Lee
Yeah, well, that's the punchline from Tom's store. He didn't buy a crank. He bought one of those little handheld.
Chick McGee
The little plastic jobs I have to put. I just moved. And. And in the. In the junk. In the junk drawer. You'll see, this all ties in.
Christy Lee
Okay.
Chick McGee
In the junk drawer there were a bunch of pencils, but they were all so dull, you couldn't write with them. So I'd be in the phone with someone with some urgent message. So I.
Christy Lee
Some urgent message that someone was leaving a message on the phone and needed.
Josh Arnold
You did the right thing by purchasing.
Chick McGee
So I got a small handheld pencil shell at my mom and dad's house. We had one in the closet. In the broom closet with a crank on it, like attached to the wall? Yeah, the good kind. But.
Tom Griswold
And then.
Chick McGee
And then, as you point out, we were talking about. In elementary school, there were certain rewards, and I think Josh pointed this out. You're kind of being enslaved by your teachers. You. Oh, by the. You get to stay after class and clean the chalkboards. That was a reward.
Josh Arnold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
This guy writes, dear Bob and Tom show. This is a guy who calls himself Bird Dog Dennis.
Josh Arnold
Yeah, he does.
Christy Lee
Yo, Bird Dog.
Chick McGee
When I was telemetry School. If you did well, you got to go to the office and make copies on the mimeograph machine.
Josh Arnold
How about that? That's the thing. You could smell it and get high, right? It just smelled good.
Chick McGee
That's one of the famous scenes in the movie Fast Times at Ridgemont High when they. They pass out the papers and they're all smelling them, and that's. That's long gone, that. I don't even know if there are any anymore. You just unlocked one of the deepest mysteries of my movie watching history.
Tom Griswold
Oh, that used to be such a mess too.
Chick McGee
I just thought that that was just a funny scene because they were just idiots and they were no idea there was a thing attached.
Josh Arnold
It just works as a silly visual bit, doesn't it?
Christy Lee
Yeah. Okay.
Tom Griswold
But man, did you ever have to do that.
Chick McGee
It was a great smell. You ever open up like a magic Marker and you got kind of huff it? Oh, yeah, it was the same thing.
Josh Arnold
Magic marker, old paint in the bag. Sure, yeah. A lot of fun stuff. You like old paint in the bag?
Christy Lee
Oh, you man.
Chick McGee
Old paint in the bag.
Josh Arnold
Have a little fun.
Chick McGee
You know when you just go and.
Christy Lee
See a bag of paint. You're huffing paint. Tom, your son's huffing paint. He had all the keyboard cleaners take.
Josh Arnold
That, turn it upside down, put it in a bag.
Christy Lee
Oh, my.
Josh Arnold
Well, remember tomorrow I'll tell you that much.
Chick McGee
I mean, there's. There's. There's a world of lost smells out there now. I wonder if there's a smell museum. Oh, that would really be. I mean, think about it, Christy. I think we may have fallen on a great idea. The. The smell museum.
Josh Arnold
Oh, God. Don't go to the hockey bag exhibit.
Christy Lee
Aren't smells the. The foremost trigger of memories?
Chick McGee
Yes, they say that. That's.
Christy Lee
Yeah, I.
Chick McGee
And I get that. I mean, you could blindfold me and take me to my parents old house, and I could go into a certain room where they had one of those closets with the wood in them. What are those called?
Christy Lee
Cedar.
Tom Griswold
Cedar, yeah.
Christy Lee
And then they're doing it again.
Chick McGee
Sorry, I couldn't think of the word. The point is, that would take me back to that special spot. But you have to have it partitioned off. I mean, because you couldn't just have the smell museum. Yeah, because everything. All the smells together.
Tom Griswold
Right.
Chick McGee
Because there are certain smells that have gone away. Like the mimeograph machine.
Christy Lee
I mean.
Chick McGee
Yeah. I have to think harder.
Tom Griswold
My kitchen cabinets are the original pine cabinets because my house was built in 41. And when you open the cabinets to get out a pan or something. It smells like my grandmother's kitchen. I love it.
Chick McGee
There was a thing.
Tom Griswold
Love it.
Josh Arnold
Oh, God, I forget.
Christy Lee
She loves it.
Tom Griswold
I love it.
Chick McGee
No, there was a. There. There were millions of basements in certain parts of the United States that were made out of that. What did they call that? Naughty pine. Yes, it's called like sidecar pie or something.
Christy Lee
Oh, yeah. Radon. Yeah.
Chick McGee
It wasn't radon. No, no, no. Radon is a scam. The real estate industry screw people out of money.
Christy Lee
How dare you.
Chick McGee
After the sale, how to piss away five grand. The Smell Museum. I'm gonna work on this.
Tom Griswold
Well, apparently it's been tried.
Chick McGee
The Smell Museum.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, I'm trying to. The first major museum show to focus on smell.
Josh Arnold
Interesting.
Christy Lee
And it didn't get off the ground.
Tom Griswold
Yeah. These are the museum of smells. These were all dated like 2018. 2019.
Josh Arnold
The dissipation has gotta be the thing.
Tom Griswold
Well, yeah. Cause you open it up and.
Josh Arnold
Yeah, sure. Oh, well, I guess.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Josh Arnold
What other smells have gone away, do you think?
Chick McGee
I'm thinking. I'm thinking hard about this chocolate cake.
Josh Arnold
Yeah. You don't smell that anymore. Never.
Christy Lee
Lemon. Lemonade.
Chick McGee
Well, when we come back, we may not have.
Christy Lee
The comedian doesn't have the sense of smell.
Chick McGee
Ryan Stout.
Josh Arnold
Yeah, Ryan Stout does not. And so he can't taste a ton.
Tom Griswold
That would suck.
Christy Lee
Non sonorous or whatever he's calling.
Chick McGee
Yeah, we're hanging with comedian Ryan Singer. We haven't checked in with you to see what's going on in your life. Still single? Still single. I, you know, it's been about a year. I was, you know, I'm back in a storage unit again, but this time on purpose.
Josh Arnold
Oh, okay, good.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Chick McGee
You're not living in the storage unit, are you, Couch?
Josh Arnold
No, no, no.
Chick McGee
I'm kind of just on the road all summer, so just kind of doing that.
Tom Griswold
Where do you get your mail?
Chick McGee
I get the mail at my. That's a good question. Wait a second.
Christy Lee
When I first moved to West Virginia, they had a thing called General Delivery and the city and the zip code. And you'd go down to the post office and give them your name and say general and they give you stack of mail. Yeah.
Chick McGee
So you've been single for a year. Single for a year. Maybe you should go to the. Go to the Smell Museum. Hey, good morning and welcome to the Best of the Bob and Tom Show. Coming up on the show today, old Barbie plus, Jess Hooker, comedian George Wallace, Greg Hahn, and lots more coming up next, though. Cheddar bay stuffing and Christy's engagement story. You'll hear it next here on the Bob and Tom Show.
Tom Griswold
This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you ever find yourself playing the budgeting game? Well, with the name your price tool from Progressive, you can find options that fit your budget and potentially lower your bills. Try it@progressive.com Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates price and coverage match limited by state law. Not available in all states.
Chick McGee
This is the Bob and Tom Show. Welcome back. This is Christopher in the Bob and Tom Studios. Coming up in this segment. Ooh, sounds great. Tremendously good. Cheddar bay stuffing and Christie's engagement story.
Christy Lee
I'm over here at the sports desk. Yes, you are, Tom. Looks like you're keeping track of something over there. Do you have. You have, like, lists of things that we do and don't do and you keep to a tally?
Chick McGee
Still working on some stuff over here. It's all good.
Christy Lee
Is that right?
Chick McGee
Yeah, yeah. I got a little. Couple surprises as usual.
Josh Arnold
I have a surprise, too.
Chick McGee
What is it?
Josh Arnold
This is very big news in the world of.
Christy Lee
Oh, okay.
Josh Arnold
Culinary delights.
Tom Griswold
Oh, I'm.
Josh Arnold
As you know, I subscribe to the fresh Catch. The Red Lobster newsletter. Yes.
Chick McGee
Don't be so modest. You were in the COVID three weeks ago.
Josh Arnold
Well, that's because I own property in Cheddar Bay.
Chick McGee
Okay. Holding a copy of your album, the number one comedy album in America, Josh Arnold, half bad.
Josh Arnold
That's right. And you know what? I wouldn't be half fat were it not for the help of Cheddar Bay biscuits.
Chick McGee
Okay.
Josh Arnold
Thank you.
Tom Griswold
There you go.
Christy Lee
I love those guys.
Josh Arnold
Red Lobster has announced for this Thanksgiving they are serving and at the restaurants and you can order for your home.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Josh Arnold
Cheddar Bay dressing.
Christy Lee
Oh, that's right. Really?
Josh Arnold
They're cheesy, garlicky biscuits. They've turned into a stuffing.
Christy Lee
Oh, my goodness.
Josh Arnold
You can enjoy that.
Chick McGee
That sounds good, actually.
Josh Arnold
And my gosh, if I won't be getting nine pounds of it, can you.
Christy Lee
Order it online and stuff?
Josh Arnold
Yes. Our holiday sides to go.
Chick McGee
This is a whole new industry. There's more and more people, by the way, are eating Thanksgiving out and going to restaurants and clubs, et cetera, et cetera. And all kinds of restaurants are stepping up. Of course, the famous. You talked about it before, Christy. I think the dressing made of sliders from White Castle. Very popular and a lot of fun.
Tom Griswold
I'm looking for an alternative dressing. Maybe I'll do the chair.
Josh Arnold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
Where does one get that?
Josh Arnold
Red Lobster. Yes, I'd say Go to their website. Yeah, I, of course, have a link because it's.
Christy Lee
They give a Red Lobster credit card and the whole thing. I bet.
Josh Arnold
I am a member.
Chick McGee
Vip, if you will.
Christy Lee
Oh, yeah.
Josh Arnold
You know, sometimes when you get like a really good credit card, you have a. There's one person who works your account like a specialized.
Chick McGee
Oh, yeah.
Josh Arnold
Have that with red.
Chick McGee
Very fancy. Now, we were talking about engagement rings.
Christy Lee
Your personal banker.
Chick McGee
And I've asked if you have an interesting way to present it. There was a thing on abc, ABC News, last evening at the tail end of the broadcast.
Christy Lee
ABC National News.
Chick McGee
Correct. Yes, very fine.
Josh Arnold
Who's that? Muir.
Chick McGee
David Muir. Yeah. Does a nice job.
Christy Lee
Is he. He's a little. But it was his last name. Should be coy.
Chick McGee
In a. In a. In a world of very troubling news. Very disturbing news most of the time. They had a sweet story about a young lady who's a great teacher and she's teaching little kids and. And God bless her. And her. Her boyfriend came in to do a little reading for the class.
Tom Griswold
And then my boyfriend.
Chick McGee
And then he. He leaned down and proposed on one knee. It was great.
Josh Arnold
One of those kids.
Chick McGee
That's disgusting. No, no, no. The kids were watching him.
Christy Lee
That's great.
Chick McGee
Sorry I brought them.
Christy Lee
Married and gonna be happy.
Chick McGee
No, they just. Just engaged.
Christy Lee
That's super.
Chick McGee
But, Christy, you never. Is there an exciting story about your engagement?
Christy Lee
She was in the car.
Tom Griswold
Thanks, Ace. That's it. I was in the car. That's it. That's over.
Christy Lee
Ace knew. Ace knew. He wanted you to know he knew. Way to go, Ace. I could come in here tomorrow afternoon. Manufacturer short in that paper.
Chick McGee
So what was the story?
Tom Griswold
We were attending a black tie event.
Christy Lee
In the car, not in the car.
Tom Griswold
It was for a charity.
Christy Lee
Yeah, it was a very, very, very large. Auspicious.
Tom Griswold
Unlike you, I get out and help.
Chick McGee
The community raising money.
Josh Arnold
Yachts for millionaires.
Christy Lee
Can you imagine?
Chick McGee
There's a millionaire, dock fees, the whitest.
Tom Griswold
Trash woman in the room. And you're saying you have to stop.
Josh Arnold
The yachtlessness in this country.
Christy Lee
It's a part of the kpa. Kissing.
Chick McGee
By the way, I think you just invented a word. Yachtlessness. Yeah, we're gonna know that we're. That the world's in a good place one day when they're concerned about the yachtless. So, I'm sorry. So you were doing something nice, helping raise money for a nice charity. And what?
Tom Griswold
And I was running late and fashionably late. Fashionably late. And my husband, my now husband was on his way to pick me up. And he always says, I'm on my way. He sends me a text, I'm on my way. And I know he lives five and a half minutes away, so I was outside.
Christy Lee
He still lives five and a half minutes away, doesn't he?
Tom Griswold
Yeah, till January 21st. So I was outside.
Christy Lee
That's gonna be.
Chick McGee
Hey.
Tom Griswold
Hey.
Chick McGee
Stop interrupting. Trying to get the story out for God.
Christy Lee
I know, I know. Oh, sorry.
Tom Griswold
So I was outside waiting for him when. And he pulled up and he started to get out of the car, and I go, what are you getting out of the car for?
Christy Lee
We're late.
Tom Griswold
We gotta go. And I jump in the car, and he looks at me kind of befuddled, and he had a rose. And I go, oh, you brought me a flower? He goes, yeah, I brought you a flower. Now he's kind of, you know, a little bit off his game. And he goes, you look very nice. It's a very pretty dress, but I think you need something green to wear with that. And I went green. And he said. And he pulled out the box and he said, you know the mushy stuff. And my ring had emeralds in it.
Christy Lee
So that's where the green.
Josh Arnold
Lovely.
Christy Lee
Didn't he just get it all off his dead mother? Is that right?
Tom Griswold
His mother's alive and well.
Christy Lee
Thank you.
Chick McGee
Excuse me. Excuse me. I was. Thank you for replacing Ace as being the jerk in the story.
Christy Lee
So how old is she? Like a hundred.
Tom Griswold
His mom? Yeah, she's in her, I think, early 90s.
Chick McGee
Good for her. Now shut up. Don't ruin this.
Tom Griswold
She's awesome.
Chick McGee
She approves of you coming up.
Christy Lee
You're gonna marry that?
Chick McGee
Oh, God, it's unbelievable. I'm sorry, Christy. I apologize. I'm sorry I asked. I mean, not everyone realized so bad.
Tom Griswold
I ruined his moment. I was like, I'm so sorry.
Josh Arnold
No, no, you don't know.
Chick McGee
You would have ruined the moment if you said, no way in hell, chief.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
That would have been rough.
Christy Lee
I'm not going to say no in any situation anymore. I'm going to say, no way in hell, Chief. From.
Chick McGee
From this moment on now we have. Are we done with sports?
Tom Griswold
Have you ever asked somebody to marry you and they've said no? Anybody in this room?
Josh Arnold
I. I have not. No.
Chick McGee
Pat said.
Josh Arnold
They said no. Yeah, about 12. 12.
Christy Lee
You remember Pat's first date?
Josh Arnold
That's what I say on a date.
Christy Lee
First date. My son loves you. Let's get married.
Chick McGee
Here's a picture of him. Let's. Let's get hitched. Okay. What do you Got time for World Records, kids? Oh, wait a minute. Stop, stop, stop, stop.
Christy Lee
No way in hell, chief.
Josh Arnold
We just in the hallway doing a song.
Chick McGee
Oh, that's right. I'm sorry, because we were.
Christy Lee
Will you own this and say you made a mistake here?
Chick McGee
No, I.
Josh Arnold
Go ahead, say it.
Chick McGee
Sorry.
Christy Lee
Thank you.
Chick McGee
Ace threw me off. Christy was stoned. Is this the one about Christy getting socked on the face? No, no. It's the one that you decided on.
Christy Lee
Then did you make married Sweet, sweet love in the car?
Chick McGee
Oh, that one. That's a good one. That's a good one.
Tom Griswold
No, we were.
Christy Lee
The event with the top down.
Chick McGee
We have. Yes. Christy, this is your. You've been married before.
Tom Griswold
Of course.
Chick McGee
No secret.
Tom Griswold
Yes.
Chick McGee
And Pat wrote a song about. Pat wrote a song about your. Your relationships. How about that?
Tom Griswold
Okay.
Christy Lee
In case you haven't heard about Christy.
Josh Arnold
Lee, she got married to her guy Andy. When he proposed, she said, what the hell's one more?
Christy Lee
Welcome to my family. Christy's a husband of a four.
Josh Arnold
Her first three marriages just didn't stick. Christy was 0 for 3 and tied with Chick. Now he wants to date and even up the score.
Christy Lee
Who will win the title? Chick's ex wife number four. Bring it. Bring it, baby.
Josh Arnold
They say half of marriages will end in divorce. That number seems too low. I need to find out the source. Our show is nine for nine, including.
Chick McGee
My two, of course.
Josh Arnold
Even Tom. And we all know he's hung like a horse.
Christy Lee
Forget the odds.
Josh Arnold
We wish you both the best. We know your love is gonna pass the test. But just in case it doesn't and your marriage takes a dive, may we suggest Josh Arnold for your husband number five?
Chick McGee
I'm right here, baby.
Josh Arnold
Your husband number five. One more time, your husband number five.
Tom Griswold
Lovely.
Chick McGee
Great, Pat. Thank you very much.
Christy Lee
Remember we went over that if Christy and I got married, it would be her fifth and my fourth. Welcome to Depressionville.
Chick McGee
I just want to say that's not gonna work out.
Josh Arnold
I'm proud of all you guys. Remember, it's better to have loved and lost than never loved to have loved at all.
Tom Griswold
That's exactly right.
Chick McGee
You've never been married, right?
Christy Lee
No, I haven't.
Chick McGee
How's that going?
Tom Griswold
He can still love and lose. He doesn't have to give me your comments.
Chick McGee
So you're saying you're still a loser even though you're not in our club?
Tom Griswold
That's right.
Chick McGee
So you're a lawyer free loser.
Josh Arnold
Yes. Yeah, that's the only thing.
Chick McGee
We've got some new words here. Lawyer, free loser, and yachtlessness God, that's funny. Okay, where were we? I'm sorry, is that sports?
Christy Lee
There are luge tracks in Muskegon and Marquette in Michigan, of course, and also just south of Michigan. Tom, Trying to save you some co worker grief by not mentioning Michigan here. So there you go.
Chick McGee
You asked me if the luge runs were open yet. I don't know.
Christy Lee
The bobsled run in Lake Placid.
Chick McGee
Placid. I don't know if that's a year round thing or not.
Christy Lee
I bet you.
Chick McGee
I was just saying it's very expensive and there are people devoted to that that are practicing right now for the Olympics, the Winter Games that aren't for a couple years.
Christy Lee
This is an email from Jay in Pickwa. I used to work in Pickwick, Troy, Sydney, the Tri Cities. Very nice. Break dancing is one of the most athletic things anyone can do, Tom.
Chick McGee
I understand that.
Christy Lee
In the entire world. You all are so mad about that being in the Olympics. As if they don't have curling as a sport to compete in. He says that curling is not a sport. For the love of God, stop.
Chick McGee
Well, the. The origin of the Winter Games. European witcher sports. That's the whole thing.
Christy Lee
So if they break, broke, dance on snow, would that be okay?
Chick McGee
If historically that had been a thing, which it isn't. No break. I'm not saying breakdancing isn't incredibly athletic. It's just not an Olympic sport.
Josh Arnold
You know what would be a fun.
Chick McGee
Why not do poetry writing as an Olympic sport? Then it's. There's no connection between what defines what.
Christy Lee
Constitutes an Olympic sport then?
Chick McGee
History.
Christy Lee
History.
Chick McGee
And something that is international. Like for example, basketball now has become so international. Look at the NBA for God's.
Christy Lee
Historically they competed in the nude in the Summer Games.
Tom Griswold
They don't do that anymore.
Christy Lee
I say we go back to that.
Josh Arnold
Yes.
Chick McGee
At least for the women.
Christy Lee
Especially in gymnastics, volleyball.
Chick McGee
She didn't stick the landing. She did stick that flip on the bar.
Josh Arnold
Yikes.
Chick McGee
They're gonna have to get a crowbar to get her off.
Christy Lee
Wow, look at that.
Josh Arnold
You stuck to the pummel for the.
Christy Lee
Second time this morning. I'm going to say this. She accommodated that.
Chick McGee
Well, I'm sorry, would it be funny if they're.
Josh Arnold
So they're doing the break dancing in the Winter Olympics? No, summer. Okay.
Chick McGee
In Paris.
Christy Lee
Yeah, Paris. And then at 28 they're adding squash. That's flag football.
Tom Griswold
And that's in LA, Los Angeles.
Josh Arnold
What if during the breakdancing there's a. There's a spill and like it was a Little bit water next to where the breakdancing is happening and a janitor comes out to clean it and he slips on the water, right? And he starts as he's slipping and trying not to fall. He's doing all these cool moves and he wins gold and breakdown.
Chick McGee
Oh, nice story.
Tom Griswold
I have a question.
Christy Lee
Damon is that guy and Ben Affleck is his best friend.
Chick McGee
Do you bring your own cardboard for the break dance? I don't know. Just asking.
Christy Lee
Why don't they make Goodwill hunting too? They moved away. He and Minnie Driver get married and.
Josh Arnold
I'm afraid to re watch Goodwill hunting.
Christy Lee
Yeah, it doesn't.
Josh Arnold
I fear that it's.
Christy Lee
It was a lightning in a bottle.
Josh Arnold
Yeah. I just want to yell at this. Quit your whining.
Christy Lee
You know what?
Josh Arnold
It is your fault.
Christy Lee
I just don't know how. How rich I want to be. I can't decide. I don't want to be yachtless.
Chick McGee
Okay.
Christy Lee
Well, she's a great one.
Josh Arnold
Hey, doc, I'm real smart and this girl likes me. Oh, what an awful life you have there, Will. I'm not. I'm not. I don't remember if that's the movie, but I feel it is.
Christy Lee
She used to fart in bed. Oh my God. What an exquisite ad lib. Unbelievable fat.
Chick McGee
Is that sports?
Christy Lee
No. Some. Well, now I lost my story. There was a high school football team.
Chick McGee
No. What about. What about the Crocs?
Christy Lee
Told you about the Crocs.
Chick McGee
Where do you get them?
Christy Lee
McDonald's. McDonald's and Crocs releasing a line of 75 crocs inspired by Grimace and the Hamburglar. The home of the McNugget says here is rolling out a line of custom designed clogs in cooperation with Crocs.
Chick McGee
Rubble. Rubble.
Tom Griswold
Probably crocs.com.
Chick McGee
Oh, you have to go online to get.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Christy Lee
Grimace, Hamburglar and Birdie as well as the chains classic red and yellow color scheme. Also for sale be a number of McDonald's themed charms that can be attached to the clogs including French fries, the Big Mac and the golden Arches logo. The shields will be released on November 14th selling for about 70, $75.
Tom Griswold
That's today.
Christy Lee
Matching socks for each pair of shoes will retail for 20 bucks. Customers will be able to buy them at Crocs retail locations and wholesale partners. All the Birdies are kind of cute. They're yellow.
Chick McGee
Did you know that you can get high heeled Crocs?
Josh Arnold
Oh really?
Chick McGee
Seriously, I'm not. Yeah, they got everything.
Tom Griswold
They have everything.
Josh Arnold
They Croc cowboy boots last month but I tried to buy them. They were. I was on the email list and they said, hey, they're now available. I went immediately, sold out. They were already sold out.
Chick McGee
I saw someone wearing the high heeled Crocs.
Tom Griswold
Really?
Chick McGee
Oh, they were at a Coin Star machine. What that means? Oh, pretty.
Tom Griswold
It means they were yachtless is what that.
Josh Arnold
It does mean yacht.
Christy Lee
Okay.
Chick McGee
I'm sorry, is that sports?
Josh Arnold
Actually Crocs I cracks on yachts, I bet are more common than you. Crocs are great boating shoes.
Christy Lee
Absolutely.
Tom Griswold
Great gardening shoes.
Christy Lee
The final score of a begins and ends with Topsiders.
Chick McGee
You, you land lubber.
Christy Lee
Sorry, you keep asking if that's sports. I have more sports.
Chick McGee
Okay, go ahead.
Christy Lee
And then I try to do it. You keep talking.
Chick McGee
What are you going.
Christy Lee
The final score between two high school football teams from Virginia was 104 to nothing. Whoa.
Tom Griswold
Come on.
Christy Lee
Phoebus High School of Hampton led James.
Chick McGee
Coming up next on the Bob and Tom show, you want to hang on to something? Comedian Greg Hahn is next. This is the Bob and Tom Show.
Christy Lee
Bob and Tom.
Tom Griswold
When you think about businesses that are selling through the roof, like aloe or skins, sure you think about a great product, a cool brand and brilliant marketing. But an often overlooked secret is actually the businesses behind the business making, selling and for shoppers, buying. Simple for millions of businesses, that business is Shopify. Nobody does selling better than Shopify. With shop pay that boosts conversions up to 50%, meaning way less carts are going abandoned and way more sales happening. So if you're into growing your business, your commerce platform better be ready to sell whatever your customers are scrolling or strolling on the web, in your store, in their feed and everywhere in between. Businesses that sell more sell on Shopify. Upgrade your business and get the same checkout Skins uses. Sign up for your $1 per month trial period at shopify.com Westwood1 all lowercase go to shopify.com Westwood1 to upgrade your selling today. Shopify.com Westwood One.
Chick McGee
More of the Bob and Tom show now. This is Christopher in the Bob and Tom studios. Here's a segment with comedian Greg Hahn. We've got comedian Greg Hahn, who is over there. Mr. Hannah, thrilled to be here. Commander Hans. That's right. When you left the Marine Corps, were you Captain?
Christy Lee
Too slow.
Chick McGee
Get back.
Josh Arnold
What do I have all day? Okay, Might be a good idea.
Chick McGee
Okay. Captain. Captain. Huh?
Josh Arnold
You know what? I got something going with this one girl.
Chick McGee
I sent her a text, no response.
Josh Arnold
Then suddenly out of nowhere, still nothing. You got her right where you want.
Chick McGee
Her now, Greg, you're A fancy dresser. You always have really nice shirts on. Crisp and clean. I admire that in a comedian. Thanks. Thank you. You look good. Your hair looks like it's due for.
Christy Lee
I need a haircut.
Chick McGee
Is that what it is?
Josh Arnold
I'm throwing water on it in between during the breaks.
Chick McGee
Why? Got to keep slicking it down.
Josh Arnold
Got to keep it down.
Chick McGee
I mean, because right now it's like. Like a half an inch of pure white followed by Elvis black.
Christy Lee
What's wrong with that?
Chick McGee
Maybe time to. Maybe time to dip your head in shoe polish.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Christy Lee
Why would you say that? Because it's true.
Josh Arnold
Honestly, Greg's hair does not look unnatural to me.
Christy Lee
Am I cr. Not at all.
Josh Arnold
It doesn't.
Chick McGee
Looks like he fell into a vat of ink three weeks ago and is now in recovery.
Tom Griswold
No, it doesn't.
Josh Arnold
That's how my.
Christy Lee
Doesn't at all.
Josh Arnold
The only person that looks weird in here is you. You're a weirdo looking person. You look crazy. You got a pink hat on. None of your shirts fit. You're cutting the tops off your socks. Yeah, I dip it in a little Orbison 6.
Chick McGee
Big deal.
Josh Arnold
Orbison 6?
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Josh Arnold
Wait until I get older. I'm gonna have the receding hairline toupee.
Chick McGee
It's gonna be nice.
Josh Arnold
That will be my convertible.
Chick McGee
It's gonna blow off.
Josh Arnold
Spare du Fay.
Chick McGee
Bang.
Josh Arnold
A glove collection.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Josh Arnold
Ascot collection. I like the guy that invented the disposable toupee.
Tom Griswold
Oh, yeah. Greg, you could really sport an ascot.
Josh Arnold
I'd love to see it.
Christy Lee
Yes.
Josh Arnold
Do you own one?
Christy Lee
No.
Josh Arnold
I'll buy you one. If I buy you one, will you wear it? Yes. What color now? Blue. Got it.
Chick McGee
You're a fancy dresser now, are you? Do you have a new lady in your life? Are you single and looking? What's going on?
Christy Lee
Well, it's a sexy show. I'm trying.
Josh Arnold
Wearing my Old Spice Night Panther body wash right now.
Christy Lee
Nice.
Chick McGee
Ladies love it.
Christy Lee
The old Night Panther.
Pat Godwin
Yeah.
Josh Arnold
Looking around? I gotta get a place first, Tom. You know, I'm looking around in Florida. I'm going from place to place, trying to buy a place using a reverse mortgage. Money's no object. That's how much you owe me. Yeah.
Chick McGee
What part of Florida you looking?
Josh Arnold
South Florida.
Christy Lee
Boca Raton.
Josh Arnold
Don't want the condo looking at the water or the house with the pool or the townhouse with the group group, you know?
Chick McGee
What do I want?
Tom Griswold
What's a group group?
Christy Lee
I don't know.
Josh Arnold
You're sitting around a little community, people are raising their kids.
Tom Griswold
Do you want to Be around a lot of little kids.
Josh Arnold
I don't need to be there.
Tom Griswold
No, I didn't think so.
Chick McGee
You don't want the one with the old folks, though, either. You don't want them.
Josh Arnold
Right.
Chick McGee
You don't want the one where everyone's riding those three wheeled tricycles as adults.
Josh Arnold
Well, actually, Chick, you have a different philosophy on that, don't.
Christy Lee
Yeah. You move in there. Be the immediate. Immediately. Be the. The group bully.
Tom Griswold
Heck, yeah.
Josh Arnold
Master the trampoline.
Christy Lee
That's right. Come here, Leonard. I'm gonna eat your dessert, Leonard. And you're gonna sit there. Okay.
Josh Arnold
And all the women want the young, hot guy.
Tom Griswold
That's right.
Christy Lee
Damn right they are. Yeah.
Josh Arnold
And you're gonna sit. You're gonna make Leonard watch.
Christy Lee
I'm gonna make him watch me eat his dessert.
Josh Arnold
You're gonna make a cock.
Christy Lee
Tapioca pudding? Shut up.
Josh Arnold
Might be fun. You gotta regrip your shuffleboard stick.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
Oh, cool. That's gone to. Got a lot of use.
Tom Griswold
You playing pickleball yet?
Josh Arnold
Yeah, I'm gonna get into that.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Josh Arnold
Maybe just move into the home now. Start being funny. I'll be a riot. Go to the buffet with my teeth in backwards. Oh, that is funny.
Christy Lee
Wear my watermelon helmet.
Chick McGee
You ever worn a watermelon helmet?
Christy Lee
Huh?
Tom Griswold
A lot of bees.
Chick McGee
We used to do this event where all the guys would make watermelon helmets.
Josh Arnold
This was just a joke.
Chick McGee
No, no, no, no, no, no.
Tom Griswold
This was real.
Chick McGee
This was. It's called the Watermelon Bust. And they have all these watermelons and they're all these contests, but guys, there was obviously alcohol there. And after a certain amount of alcohol, guys would make helmets out of the watermelons. And as Christy pointed out, the problem was bees. These guys would be walking around, hey, look at me. All I'm getting stuck under my head.
Tom Griswold
He's on a college campus. Does that tell you anything?
Chick McGee
A lot of fun.
Tom Griswold
A lot of fun.
Chick McGee
It's a good thing.
Christy Lee
Bob and Tom. Hey, Bob and Tom. It's Donnie.
Tom Griswold
Hey, Donnie.
Christy Lee
Hey. I think I'm gonna have to come a lawyer.
Chick McGee
Why is that, Cross?
Christy Lee
My idiot cousin Lonnie's idiot cousin Ronnie needs me.
Chick McGee
Oh, well, what'd he do?
Christy Lee
Went off and stole his identity.
Josh Arnold
Oh.
Christy Lee
Again. All I gotta say is Ronnie's a disaster. He's the last person on earth you'd Anyways. How? He still owes Rent a center over a thousand bucks for a big screen he got just to watch a Super bowl shuffle. Wild is second and foremost. He owes over 350 bucks to Columbia House. Cassette tapes.
Josh Arnold
I told him want to rip off.
Christy Lee
That was you. You send this card you found in the paper back with a penny taped to it. We'll send you 10 free tapes, then a tape each month for the next three fel years until we see you in small planes car.
Chick McGee
I remember that.
Christy Lee
Yeah. Nothing worse than have your check garnish to work. All because of Debbie Gibson's greatest head. Anyways, who want Ronnie's identity? He. He's wanted in all 52 states, mostly by. Mostly by chicks he's knocked up. I swear to God, he's pollinated more hillbillies than Billy Ray Cypress and Randall Tex Cob combined.
Josh Arnold
Randall Tex.
Christy Lee
And I hope you thieves enjoy all the calls from student loan people nine times a day trying to get money for Ronnie's seven years of juco.
Chick McGee
Yeah, and I'll say like it's.
Christy Lee
If you don't use your degree, then you shouldn't have to pay for one. It should work like wet naps. State law. Okay, so identity thieves. If you're out there, good luck, because whatever you do with Ronnie's identity, you'll probably only help him out, especially his credit score. His goal is to get it up in the triple digits again.
Chick McGee
Oh, nice.
Christy Lee
Better run. I don't know about beer can chicken, but that br I got from the food truck last night at boonies starting to come full circle.
Tom Griswold
Okay.
Christy Lee
Stomach's turning over so much.
Chick McGee
Feels like baby going to breach on me. Identity theft happens to. Happens to anybody. It's a terrible thing. We have comedian Greg Hunt joining us in the studio. Greg, once again on his way to Louisville. He's on a midwestern swing. It'll be Louisville this weekend with Willie G. And then a couple weeks, it'll be Go Bananas, where you guys are recording some live. Live stuff. Is that correct?
Josh Arnold
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. New albums for us. Is this your first one, Willie? Yeah, I think so. All right.
Chick McGee
Yeah, Good. Do you have a title?
Josh Arnold
Yeah, Greg Hahn's Greatest hits. Oh, how nice.
Christy Lee
Yeah, right, right.
Chick McGee
Really? Yeah, that's what I'm doing.
Christy Lee
What's wrong with that? I've had one album.
Josh Arnold
Now it's time for the greatest hits. Next is the classics.
Chick McGee
Yeah, okay, sounds good. Well, right now it's time for some classic news with Christy Lee. What do you got?
Tom Griswold
A former manager at the Harvard Medical School morgue has been indicted in the theft and sale of human body parts.
Josh Arnold
My gosh.
Tom Griswold
Mr. Cedric Lodge, New Hampshire, stole dissected portions of cadavers that were donated to the School in the scheme that stretched from 2018 to early 2023.
Josh Arnold
Just upcycling, really.
Tom Griswold
The 55 year old sometimes took the body parts back to his home where.
Josh Arnold
He made love to them.
Tom Griswold
Well, he lives there with his wife, Denise. Some remains were sent to buyers through the mail. I have no idea what Denise has.
Chick McGee
To do with this, but I. I don't understand.
Christy Lee
Well, you gotta wrap them.
Josh Arnold
Why?
Tom Griswold
Defendants were part of a nationwide network of people who bought and sold remains stolen from the school and an Arkansas mortuary.
Josh Arnold
There are many reasons.
Chick McGee
What are they?
Josh Arnold
You got your underground supper clubs.
Chick McGee
Yep.
Josh Arnold
You got your.
Chick McGee
You can't. This stuff hasn't been tainted with.
Josh Arnold
There are good chefs out there that can take.
Tom Griswold
Oh, come on.
Josh Arnold
Yeah. That's a tender, tender piece of meat, isn't it? The old paranese.
Chick McGee
A taste of embalming fluid. No. Why would anyone want human body parts? You're like a weird witch and you.
Josh Arnold
Want to make some sort of stew or potion. I don't appreciate you saying weird witch. Witches are out there doing. Are you trying to get us hexed?
Christy Lee
You don't want to hex, okay?
Josh Arnold
You're some sort of noble witch out here. He didn't mean that, ladies. He's just joking.
Tom Griswold
Apparently, he was accused of letting buyers actually come into the morgue and pick what remains they wanted to buy. Oh, did they put them in a.
Chick McGee
Bag and take them home?
Tom Griswold
Well, no.
Chick McGee
They talk about hauling ass.
Tom Griswold
He would then take, like, a Butt.
Christy Lee
Please. Was it like eyeballs and stuff?
Tom Griswold
Donated cadavers, brain, skin, bones. He would take them back to his New Hampshire home and ship them to buyers through the mail.
Josh Arnold
Wow.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
So this is at a. At the Harvard Medical School, correct? Wow.
Josh Arnold
Yeah. He was selling them on a website, but he was only selling young men on his website. Really, Eboy? Harvard Medical School? Yeah, yeah, yeah. They're really messing around.
Chick McGee
I went to college myself. Did you know?
Josh Arnold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
I was a bachelor of farts. All right.
Christy Lee
Hey, Pat's got a song for it. Hey. Okay. Bachelor of farts.
Josh Arnold
That's great. Come on.
Tom Griswold
I can't really find an answer as to what people are doing with these body parts, but I'm telling you, there's.
Josh Arnold
Some Would be cannibals giving it a shot. There's a lot of weirdos out there. A lot of grizzly things.
Chick McGee
But these bodies have been lying around in a medical school for a year. Well, you can't eat them.
Josh Arnold
They're frozen. Possibly.
Chick McGee
No, they're not. People have been dissecting them to learn about Anatomy. I mean, I just don't understand what they'd be for. Well, I mean, obviously.
Tom Griswold
Great conversation piece. Oh, sure. Is that a brain on your counter?
Josh Arnold
It is. Thank you for asking.
Christy Lee
Where'd you get it?
Josh Arnold
Well, mail order. The classic joke.
Chick McGee
Abby someone.
Josh Arnold
Okay.
Chick McGee
That handsome man over there is Greg Hahn.
Christy Lee
I don't understand conductors.
Josh Arnold
You like conductors of orchestras?
Christy Lee
I don't get it. You know what I mean.
Chick McGee
Lady's been playing oboe for 40 years. You're telling me she doesn't know when to come in.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, I agree. And they very rarely look at the guy or gal.
Chick McGee
I'm sure it's important they make. They help with the arrangements. And they get to wave their arms up there. Yeah, it's fun.
Tom Griswold
You have a baton. Don't.
Chick McGee
I do. It's.
Tom Griswold
He orchestrates us. Look at that.
Christy Lee
Oh, it's in a cage.
Josh Arnold
Willie gave that to you As a sort of a joke, and, boy, did you start using it. Seriously, I don't know who put it away.
Chick McGee
You just keep right there. Now, watch this. It's funny time. And I'll go.
Christy Lee
Greg. Yes, yes.
Chick McGee
See, I just pointed the stick. How come Bobby Flay never wears a hair net? Does he have a dish called Flay mignon?
Christy Lee
He should.
Chick McGee
He probably does. We have Bobby Flay. Flay, the Bobby Flav. I've got my conductor's baton. It's time now for Christy Lee at the news desk.
Tom Griswold
An update on our emojis from yesterday. According to new research, emojis could soon start popping up in medical communications, including emails and letters from your doctor. Researchers at the University of California, Riverside, are suggesting that emojis could improve communication between doctors and patients. The report said emojis can bypass communication barriers like education, language and age.
Chick McGee
I mean, it does make sense to a degree. You know, you go to the doctor, instead of telling you some bad news, he just hands you a thing with a heart emoji broken in half and a graveyard emoji. OG really?
Christy Lee
It's like a tombstone.
Josh Arnold
I knew my doctor went to the University of California, Riverside.
Tom Griswold
Oh, he did.
Josh Arnold
Dr. Jughead.
Christy Lee
That's Riverdale.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Christy Lee
That was.
Chick McGee
That was an Archie joke. Yeah, I didn't get it. We're coming right back with more the Best of the Bob and Tom show here. Coming up next, the ballroom Blitz. And Tom was right. But next on the Bob and Tom Show, a great segment with comedian George Wallace. You'll hear that in just a minute. Here on the Bob and Tom Show.
Christy Lee
This episode is brought to you by Dutch Bros. Get stoked. For all the holly jolly vibes this.
Tom Griswold
Season at Dutch Bros, stay cozy with returning winter faves.
Christy Lee
Hazelnut truffle mocha and candy cane mocha.
Tom Griswold
Plus the new winter shimmer rebel energy drink blends up sweet cream and blue razz flavor with soft top and shimmer.
Christy Lee
Springs to keep those spirits energized all winter long. Download the Dutch Bros app to find your nearest shop. Order ahead and start earning rewards.
Chick McGee
This is the Bob and Tom show. This is Christopher in the Bob and Tom studios. Hope you're having a great day today. In this segment here, a great one by a great comedian, George Wallace on the Bob and Tom show.
Christy Lee
Here's Tom Griswold with guest.
Chick McGee
Joining us in the studio, it's a comedy legend, Mr. George Wallace.
Pat Godwin
Dr. George Wallace. By the way, I'm a doctor now.
Christy Lee
Oh, wonderful.
Pat Godwin
Yeah, don't you all feel better since I'm sitting here? Yeah, but I need to go to the doctor. I broke a tooth this morning on the way here. Chewing gum.
Christy Lee
Oh, yeah.
Josh Arnold
How about that?
Christy Lee
Oh, wow.
Pat Godwin
And you know, the dentist is making all the money now, so I got to go and see the dentist. Last time I was at the dentist, the lady was cleaning me. What you call that techno, what do you call it? That lady?
Josh Arnold
Oh, the technician.
Pat Godwin
Yeah. She had that little sharp thing sticking, man. I said, oh, she says. I said. She said she didn't feel anything, so I bit her on the finger. So. How about that?
Tom Griswold
You feel it now?
Pat Godwin
Now I gotta go back to the dentist again. Isn't that amazing when they're sticking you? She said I don't feel anything.
Chick McGee
Well, it's appropriate because. Mr. McGee.
Josh Arnold
Yes?
Christy Lee
I had a tooth pulled a couple days ago and it's still.
Pat Godwin
I'm sorry, Mr. McGee. It's called extraction now.
Christy Lee
Extraction.
Chick McGee
Explain, Dr. Wallace.
Christy Lee
$3,000 price tag, I guess.
Chick McGee
And you haven't complained about it yet today.
Christy Lee
Oh, I have. Well, I've.
Tom Griswold
It's a little purple.
Christy Lee
Uncle Vic reupped. That's what happened.
Chick McGee
Nice.
Christy Lee
Yeah, things are a little bit better, but. Yeah, it still's weird back there, they had that little mesh get came off.
Chick McGee
Is your prescription a limited run?
Christy Lee
Yes, of course it's a limited run. I can't be allowed to just willy nilly go into a pharmacy. What do you think?
Tom Griswold
Narcotics are a big deal these days.
Christy Lee
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Chick McGee
Okay.
Christy Lee
They.
Chick McGee
How many? How many you got left? Not that you're counting.
Christy Lee
None of your business.
Josh Arnold
Besides the three you sold a God.
Christy Lee
150 bucks a piece. 50 bucks a pill.
Chick McGee
Mr. George Wallace has Joined us. That doesn't mean we're going to stop with a stellar sportscast, does it?
Christy Lee
Oh, here we go. The Indiana State Fair is looking for 15 people to compete in the USA Mullet Championship this summer.
Josh Arnold
Dr. Wallace Yin.
Pat Godwin
I'm already in.
Tom Griswold
That's what I was gonna say. Mullet.
Christy Lee
Fish. I'm telling you, this takes place on July 29th. Yeah, they're going to. The judges will judge contestants on their flow.
Josh Arnold
Okay.
Christy Lee
With their mullet. The winner takes home 500 bucks and earns a spot in the. The USA Mullet Championships. Top 25 main. M A N E. Main event. Main event.
Pat Godwin
Okay.
Tom Griswold
It has to be hair, not fish.
Christy Lee
Okay.
Pat Godwin
I come here to play cornhole. But you got mullet.
Christy Lee
We can do whatever you want, George. I'm in.
Chick McGee
Speaking of cornhole coming up now. I'm trying to. Who's the.
Christy Lee
If you're old enough to be an adult right now. You had a mullet in your past. I'm sure you did. Like, everybody had goatees and.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Christy Lee
So don't act like you don't know what we're talking.
Tom Griswold
I don't know what you're talking about.
Pat Godwin
And I'm old. I should know.
Chick McGee
The most famous mullet was Billy Ray Cyrus. That's a haircut, remember?
Christy Lee
Yeah. Yeah.
Josh Arnold
Okay.
Chick McGee
Real long in the back and short in the front.
Pat Godwin
But he said in your pants. Didn't you just say in your pants?
Christy Lee
I don't. I. I could have. George, I don't think.
Josh Arnold
Remember.
Chick McGee
Remember, He's. He's. He's swimming in a sea of narcotics.
Pat Godwin
That's why I'm sitting closer to him.
Chick McGee
Yeah. The mullet hairstyle.
Pat Godwin
Yeah, It's.
Chick McGee
They're still out there.
Josh Arnold
Yeah. You'll still see them every now and again.
Chick McGee
They're kind of.
Tom Griswold
Johnny Baker has one.
Josh Arnold
They're kind of back for maybe about a year ago. They kind of started resurfacing.
Christy Lee
The kids have them nowadays. The kids have them.
Pat Godwin
That's what I was gonna say.
Chick McGee
Who's the quarterback? I just.
Tom Griswold
Gardner.
Christy Lee
Gardner Minshew had one Mississippi Mud Flap. That's what he calls it. Yeah.
Pat Godwin
Okay.
Chick McGee
That's cool.
Christy Lee
All right.
Josh Arnold
You see the kids out there with them, George?
Christy Lee
I see.
Pat Godwin
Even the black kids with apples. Don't they have them coming with the, like, blonde hair and coming all the way back?
Josh Arnold
Oh, maybe.
Christy Lee
Oh, y.
Pat Godwin
Know they're having black people here. Do they?
Chick McGee
Sorry.
Pat Godwin
I haven't seen any since I've been here.
Christy Lee
I think the. The mullet equivalent is the how they tilted. They. They had it shaped Their like the.
Chick McGee
Guy in the Ohio Players.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Chick McGee
That was cool. The mullet is the haircut of people, George, who leave to get cigarettes and never come back home. You know, they're.
Josh Arnold
There are some fine folks with mullets out there, I'm sure.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Josh Arnold
There's a gentleman named Kent who runs a bait shop that I go to. Very nice man, Josh. If you're getting sore and the anesthesiologist walks in and he's got this huge mullet. Are you playing ball?
Christy Lee
You're cool.
Chick McGee
You're still.
Josh Arnold
I'm fine with it, yeah. Anesthesiologist, sure. Yeah.
Christy Lee
I believe a former roommate of yours, Jerry Seinfeld, had mullet at one time.
Pat Godwin
It was long, you know. Now a lot of. Let me make this perfect, okay? You guys don't know who you're talking to. I'm the real George on the show, okay? Did y'all know that?
Christy Lee
We did not know that.
Pat Godwin
This is not a joke. I'm the roommate for 13 years. I'm the real George. Would you tell them I've been. Last time I was in with you, 30 years ago. I'm the real George. I'm his roommate for. I'm the best man in his wedding. And I'm the father, his kids. You guys.
Chick McGee
Wow.
Pat Godwin
Best man for 47 years.
Christy Lee
That really escalated there.
Pat Godwin
47 years and a lot of people. I have to help people to know I'm actually the real George. I talked to him three times a day every day for 47 years.
Christy Lee
Have you seen George at one of the episodes George is in? It's George Wallace.
Chick McGee
You mean the fellow sitting right there?
Christy Lee
Yeah, right there.
Josh Arnold
In fact, Dr. Wallace. Plays a doctor.
Christy Lee
Plays a doctor, and Desperado comes on. He kind of looks off. It's wonderful. It's hilarious.
Pat Godwin
You know how that bit came up? Because I used to do a joke about his son. His son. You know, they're Jewish, so I was one of the. The bearers of. When the son was. How do you say they call it a brisk. Brisk. How'd you know that?
Christy Lee
No, it wasn't me.
Tom Griswold
It was Willie.
Pat Godwin
Okay, Willie. It was a brisk. And so it's supposed to be the father and the grandfather to hold the leg of the little boy. But it was me and Jerry. And so they had. And I said to the little boy, after they got the baby drunk, first the little boy got him drunk.
Christy Lee
They did.
Pat Godwin
They put it on a sponge and they put. They put wine in his mouth. And then the rabbi did his little thing.
Christy Lee
Zip. And.
Pat Godwin
And then. And to this day, every time I walk into his house, that little boy looks at me and go, I know you from somewhere. So that's where that bit came from. I only did one episode because we keep friendship and business separate.
Christy Lee
Yeah, that would explain the friendship, I guess.
Josh Arnold
Yeah, yeah.
Chick McGee
Do you ever get to ride in his Porsches?
Pat Godwin
Listen, Porsche his collection of. Flying a jet. That's why I take advantage of this, you know. He got a jet, I got a jet. The other day he told me, you need to get your own plane. I said, why should we get another plane?
Christy Lee
That's right. Because that's friendship. That's not business.
Chick McGee
Let me tell you something.
Pat Godwin
And he's got too much, way too much money. You know, I'm doing fine, I'm blessed. But he's got way too much money. I was at his house the other night. I have my own suite at his house on the island. You know, it's just way too much money. I got up to pee at 3 o'clock in the morning. I came back, my bed was made, there was chocolate on my pillow. That is too much money.
Josh Arnold
That is too. That's too much.
Pat Godwin
You should go to his house. And when you play ping pong, click, click, click, click. Eventually a ball goes astray somewhere.
Christy Lee
Right? Right.
Pat Godwin
If my ball went astray, I turn around, he don't go get it. Don't go get it. He turns around, he got a crystal ball with 200 ping pong balls. You know, all houses, you only allow three ping pong balls in 200 independent. I could tell you about money. Just too much money.
Chick McGee
Mr. George Wallace has joined us. A comedian, a legendary comedian. And I know that you probably know everything there is to know about comedy. You think?
Pat Godwin
I think.
Chick McGee
But even Tiger woods takes golf lessons occasionally. He's got someone that coaches him on his swing. And ladies and gentlemen.
Christy Lee
Shopping the other day and looking around, found what I.
Josh Arnold
Like to ask the salesman. Cargo space. He goes, no, cargo road. Cargo space, no cargo road.
Christy Lee
If I laugh, because that's just stupid, does that count?
Chick McGee
I was laughing because Mr. Wallace just smiled.
Pat Godwin
Anyway, I thought that was the second.
Christy Lee
Part of the joke.
Josh Arnold
You thought there was a punchline.
Christy Lee
You know what?
Pat Godwin
I like jokes like that. I like jokes that make no sense whatsoever.
Josh Arnold
You came to the right place.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, you did.
Pat Godwin
I did a racial joke one time. Said two Jews are black and a Mexican walked into a bar. Bartender said, y'all get the hell out of here.
Christy Lee
And that's it.
Tom Griswold
That's true.
Josh Arnold
You gotta be a real comedian to understand that joke.
Pat Godwin
Carson, favorite joke.
Josh Arnold
Hilarious.
Pat Godwin
But I set it up better in the club. But you guys laugh unless you just.
Josh Arnold
Well, we're all. We're all terrible. Racist. But.
Pat Godwin
You guys are having too much fun up here. You guys get paid to do this.
Chick McGee
No, I don't.
Josh Arnold
I don't.
Chick McGee
Not today.
Josh Arnold
Well, they do. Okay?
Christy Lee
They do.
Pat Godwin
Let me hear that joke one more time.
Chick McGee
So I. I'm looking at Mr. Wallace's web page and. And I glance at this one photograph and I go, my God, that this son of yours looks just like you. Then I realized that's Alonzo Bowden, the famous. I mean, I love Alonzo.
Pat Godwin
Alonzo is wonderful. I talk to him every day.
Tom Griswold
We love him.
Pat Godwin
He's great that he has that great voice. Actually, we're gonna go out on a tour together. We're gonna go on a boat.
Tom Griswold
Oh, nice.
Pat Godwin
And we're gonna. I'm gonna be with the. Headlining with. With the guy. Patti LaBelle and the guy that used to be with the Doobie Brothers. What's his name?
Tom Griswold
Michael McDonald.
Christy Lee
I love Michael McDonald.
Pat Godwin
I know you love everybody.
Chick McGee
I love Michael McDonald.
Tom Griswold
Of us.
Josh Arnold
Doesn't care for us.
Chick McGee
That's cuz I know them.
Josh Arnold
I don't know Michael McDonald. I just love his music, boss.
Pat Godwin
So, you know, you got to go. Y'all like him, but you know, he doesn't.
Tom Griswold
I don't.
Chick McGee
Oh, lucky you're here, cuz. The ass kissing begins at 8:12.
Pat Godwin
He can't say ass on radio.
Chick McGee
I work with several of them.
Christy Lee
Oh, here.
Pat Godwin
And I just got here. That includes me, too.
Chick McGee
Now, do you live primarily in Atlanta?
Pat Godwin
I live at United and Delta. Listen, when you've been doing it for 47 years, you pretty much have a joke for every everything. It just comes out. It just is, you know, especially. It's my passion. And I love what I do. I just love.
Chick McGee
You don't have a dog, I'm guessing, do you?
Pat Godwin
Hell, no. I got no dog. What would I want? I mean, I love dogs, but I'm out of town every day I'm in a different. What if I had a support dog on a plane with me?
Chick McGee
What kind of dog would you get?
Pat Godwin
A black song.
Josh Arnold
He doesn't care.
Chick McGee
I have two. Believe it or not, George, I have.
Christy Lee
Two very white dogs. Get the hell out of here.
Chick McGee
So a black dog and a white dog.
Josh Arnold
Two black dogs and a Chihuahua walking.
Chick McGee
You gotta augment it. One more dog.
Josh Arnold
Right, But I'm trying to think of what.
Chick McGee
A schnauzer. What would be the most insulting dog?
Josh Arnold
I don't know, the poodle kind of has those curls that go down.
Chick McGee
That could work.
Josh Arnold
There you go.
Pat Godwin
I used to do a joke about dogs. How come it when dogs bark at night, they have to get that last bark in.
Christy Lee
It's kind of the.
Josh Arnold
You heard me.
Christy Lee
What you gonna do about it?
Chick McGee
I'm hanging out with comedian George Wallace.
Pat Godwin
Yeah.
Chick McGee
Growing up with the. We were talking about this the other day. Sometimes people have the name of someone who's famous and you grew up there was a famous George Wallace. Yes, but much different.
Christy Lee
Your thoughts?
Pat Godwin
Yeah. Well, even when I got to college, the University of Akron and that my nickname was Governor Drew Colin, they called me Governor at the University of Akron. And I'm from Georgia, so I was the next state away, and I am the same George Wallace. I said segregation today, segregation tomorrow, and segregation forever. I went to California, got a little.
Josh Arnold
Song, you know, nobody laughs when I do my George Wallace.
Chick McGee
Coming up next on the Bob and Tom Show. Doesn't happen very often, but Tom was right. That's next. Come on back. It's the Bob and Tom Show.
Christy Lee
Bob and Tom. This episode is brought to you by Lifelock.
Chick McGee
The holidays mean more travel, more shopping.
Christy Lee
More time online, and more personal info.
Chick McGee
In places that could expose you to identity theories theft. That's why LifeLock monitors millions of data points every second.
Christy Lee
If your identity is stolen, their US space restoration specialist will fix it, guaranteed, or your money back. Get more holiday fun and less holiday worry with Lifelock.
Chick McGee
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Christy Lee
Visit lifelock.com podcast terms apply.
Chick McGee
This is the Bob and Tom Show. Welcome back. This is Christopher in the Bob and Tom studios. Here's a segment where Tom. Mom was right.
Josh Arnold
Really?
Tom Griswold
We have to do the you were right dance.
Chick McGee
Why?
Tom Griswold
Ace and I had lunch yesterday at your restaurant that you said had the best pizza in the city. Pretty damn good.
Josh Arnold
And we teased Christy for eating like a bird.
Christy Lee
She ate half a pizza.
Tom Griswold
Oh my God, it was so good.
Josh Arnold
Nice.
Christy Lee
Yes, whatever. Chunkles, go ahead.
Chick McGee
But the better part of the argument was Ace said that. That that area doesn't exist.
Tom Griswold
Right?
Chick McGee
He goes, there are no stores there.
Tom Griswold
I was with him. I was totally.
Christy Lee
You guys.
Tom Griswold
You guys are going there.
Christy Lee
That was the. It's. It's gone from there's nothing there to he really building there. There it is. He'll say anything he can not to be.
Chick McGee
He said there was. There was nothing there.
Christy Lee
There's a freaking hotel there. Yeah, but there's no restaurant. See, here we go.
Tom Griswold
I didn't even know there was a hotel. Honestly, I thought there was nothing there but office buildings.
Chick McGee
There is something there.
Josh Arnold
But it was good stuff.
Christy Lee
Huh.
Chick McGee
Isn't that great pizza?
Tom Griswold
It was really good. Very good.
Chick McGee
Very, very nice. Nothing like great pizza in Christmas time. I say, do you ever do a. We made our own pizzas last weekend.
Tom Griswold
Did you?
Chick McGee
Which is really fun because instead of spending, I don't know, 15 bucks for a nice to go pizza, you spend $60 buying the ingredients.
Tom Griswold
What ingredients do the girls put on their pizzas?
Chick McGee
Oh, that. It gets complicated. Yeah. You got to buy the right kind of cheese.
Christy Lee
Is it gummy bears?
Chick McGee
No, that was last night.
Christy Lee
We had a fairy dropping.
Tom Griswold
Did you do cookie party?
Chick McGee
We had a gingerbread house building party at my house. Santa came over. It was amazing. I don't know how we had the time. Santa came over to your house with Mrs. Claus.
Tom Griswold
My God.
Josh Arnold
Isn't it?
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Tom Griswold
To only have grown up a Griswold.
Christy Lee
Something else.
Chick McGee
Gross. Yeah. The kids had a wonderful time.
Josh Arnold
No doubt.
Christy Lee
You know, there are probably some things you might want to edit out of your stories. That might have been one of them.
Chick McGee
I do have a interesting.
Christy Lee
God only knows what he paid Santa.
Josh Arnold
Claus to come over this time of year.
Chick McGee
Man.
Christy Lee
Goodwill.
Tom Griswold
It's goodwill.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Josh Arnold
No, not this week.
Chick McGee
There may have been a gentleman named Benjamin involved.
Christy Lee
I don't know how you doing, Santa Claus?
Chick McGee
But tip for those buildings. A house.
Tom Griswold
A gingerbread house.
Chick McGee
No, I'm at a regular house.
Christy Lee
Continue to break new barriers and narrow casting. Now, how about you people building a house? Go.
Chick McGee
Everybody at some point in your life, everybody wants to build a house.
Christy Lee
Wants to?
Josh Arnold
Sure.
Chick McGee
Yeah. Well, maybe you should work harder. Maybe do better in life. Got a. Got a brand new house.
Christy Lee
You are just making friends.
Josh Arnold
The everyman.
Christy Lee
Good God.
Chick McGee
Accessible. I'll talk to you. You Josh?
Josh Arnold
Yes. Yes.
Chick McGee
Do you have a basement at your place?
Josh Arnold
I do.
Chick McGee
Okay. Now I have an entire one. Entirely unfinished basement. I mean it is entirely unfinished. There's no furniture down there any. The kids, after they built their gingerbread houses ran around the unfinished basement all night.
Josh Arnold
Yeah, it's great.
Chick McGee
There's nothing down there.
Tom Griswold
Well, you can get the best you can get them. What. What did you do in your basement when you were a kid?
Josh Arnold
We roller skates.
Tom Griswold
Roller skates? You could roller skate in the basement.
Chick McGee
And I spent some time yesterday one online. The basement has these pillars in it.
Tom Griswold
Sure.
Chick McGee
You steal like.
Tom Griswold
So you're gonna put mats around.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Christy Lee
So I holds the floor up.
Chick McGee
Yeah. You can buy these mats that go around the pillars. I don't want One of the kids in a game of hide and seek, clunking their head.
Josh Arnold
Oh, but that's how they learn.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Josh Arnold
Didn't you put the piano down there.
Chick McGee
For them to play? I did. That's. That's in my little officer. That's completely. Also unfinished. The only thing. That's the only thing in there that it's actually plugged in.
Christy Lee
Huh?
Chick McGee
A little electric piano. Thank you, Pat God.
Christy Lee
You're welcome. I applaud your efforts. Trying to protect them. It won't work, but. Yeah, keep. Keep trying.
Chick McGee
So far, the only kids who've been injured, my friend's kids. There was the one child that needed stitches after the knife incident. And then there was the. Then there was. Keep in mind crashing of the electric motorcycle into a garbage can incident.
Christy Lee
Whenever he talks about a knife and anyone getting cut, it's the fingers almost cut entirely off.
Josh Arnold
Off.
Christy Lee
It's always 30 stitches or more. It's never just a snip.
Chick McGee
Just seven.
Tom Griswold
Seven stitches. Okay.
Chick McGee
Brand new knife was.
Christy Lee
Oh, I don't believe that either.
Chick McGee
Well, okay, I can.
Josh Arnold
Being a parent has to be hard for many reasons, but one has to be because you want your kids to learn certain things, which means they have to hurt themselves.
Tom Griswold
Right?
Josh Arnold
But you don't want your kids to hurt themselves. What.
Chick McGee
At what point they'd gone to this. This special camp where you learn how to do all kinds of skills. And one of them was knights knife throwing. No, no, but. And there were certain rules and they were. I said, okay, we're gonna. After. After dinner we're gonna go do a little carving.
Christy Lee
So one of your daughters.
Chick McGee
I need 30 seconds. I gotta clear the dishes. 20 seconds later, they come running in with two bloody hands. See, they couldn't wait. So they did learn something.
Josh Arnold
Yeah, they did. They did.
Chick McGee
And then there's that phone call to your friend. Hey, listen, I'm on my way to the emergency room with your daughter. Yeah, but no, no. All cuts. Last night. It was a fun night.
Tom Griswold
Oh, good.
Chick McGee
Oh, we have a great show. Special surprise guest. Very, very big surprise.
Josh Arnold
Oh, wow.
Chick McGee
And also we have our house band. It's Duke Tomato in the power trio. They'll be joining us in a matter of moments from the other room. But Mr. Godwin, I think we could start off with a song. I was thinking about something. I got a nice note here about how those watching on the various places you can watch this show, YouTube, etc. They enjoy the fact that you're no longer dying you're hair. Oh, wow. Years ago, you. You've Got that white haired look. You're being. You've been compared to the guy who played Jay Peterman.
Tom Griswold
Oh, yes, Seinfeld.
Chick McGee
That guy. He's the dog show guy now.
Tom Griswold
Yes.
Chick McGee
Has that distinguished buffant of white hair. But you used to dye your hair.
Josh Arnold
Yeah, I dyed a lot of stuff.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Chick McGee
And then. Did you ever dye the. The pubic region? I mean, your hair is like snow white, so I assume it's Absolutely.
Josh Arnold
Yeah, I got a couple down there.
Chick McGee
I had some on the forearm, arms and the chest. I did the chest a couple times and.
Tom Griswold
Really?
Chick McGee
Oh, yeah, yeah. You dyed your chest right at all.
Josh Arnold
Vanity knows no bounds, right? Yeah, yeah, that's all right.
Chick McGee
And. But you have a tribute to hair done.
Christy Lee
Oh, I died everywhere, man.
Chick McGee
Colored all my hair, man.
Josh Arnold
Just for men down there, man.
Chick McGee
I used to die everywhere, man.
Josh Arnold
Head hair, chest hair, arm hair, leg.
Chick McGee
Hair, ear hair, nose hair, lip hair.
Christy Lee
Chin hair, neck hair back here, belly hair, brow hair. The hair above my ass crack, I swear.
Josh Arnold
Toe hair, shin hair, cheek hair, ball hair.
Christy Lee
I dyed everywhere. Oh, I died everywhere, man.
Josh Arnold
And I didn't have hair to spare, man. It was black as coal down there, man.
Chick McGee
When I was done, pubes and three gray hairs, man.
Josh Arnold
Now I'm as white as Santa.
Christy Lee
Oh, while I died everywhere, man.
Chick McGee
Thank you very much. Thank you very much. I was thinking about that. I heard some Johnny Cash Christmas music coming in this morning.
Josh Arnold
Oh, very nice.
Chick McGee
There's this reindeer controversy that Christie brought up.
Christy Lee
Women. Nothing but women. Reindeer pulling the sleigh.
Chick McGee
You want to call them lady reindeers, right? They're not humans, broads, females.
Tom Griswold
They're not broads.
Chick McGee
The lady reindeer. So what's the deal here? That Rudolph's the only male reindeer?
Tom Griswold
Well, I guess, if you want to call it that.
Chick McGee
Why is that now?
Tom Griswold
Because the male reindeer lose their antlers in the winter. Winter. And the females retain them.
Chick McGee
So the advantage would be at least the female reindeers will stop and ask for directions.
Tom Griswold
True.
Chick McGee
Whereas the male. The male reindeer just go, I know where it is. We're gonna find it.
Christy Lee
When did the female reindeer stop their menses?
Josh Arnold
When?
Tom Griswold
When?
Christy Lee
Yeah, when?
Tom Griswold
When they're dead? I don't know.
Christy Lee
They have menses all their lives.
Tom Griswold
I. I would think.
Christy Lee
You think they all synced up. I bet they did.
Josh Arnold
They must. I mean, they'd have to.
Chick McGee
Yeah, yeah, yeah. That one terrible year where it landed. Landed on Christmas Eve. Almost quit.
Christy Lee
You can't keep flushing your tampons in the restroom.
Josh Arnold
That's why Rudolph's red is nose red.
Chick McGee
Wow, you were so happy with the.
Tom Griswold
Joke, you sped it up and turned.
Chick McGee
The words out of order.
Josh Arnold
You know, this is what happens when we start a show in the early morning.
Christy Lee
Yeah, I know.
Josh Arnold
We really. 10am is really.
Christy Lee
I've been a long time champion over. Later, later.
Josh Arnold
That joke would have been fine.
Chick McGee
They read the transcripts in court. It's in the afternoon. You go, hey, look, your honor, it was.
Josh Arnold
Yeah, what do you want from me.
Chick McGee
Early in the morning? Give me a break. I don't see you putting your robe on at 4:00am and writing this stuff. All right, now we have Mr. Chick McGee over there. By the way, surprise guest coming up this morning.
Tom Griswold
Oh, really?
Chick McGee
We're gonna have some Christmas music out of Duke and the Boys. We'll also meet comedian Al Jackson.
Tom Griswold
But right now, did you hire Santa to visit us too?
Chick McGee
Santa's very busy today.
Christy Lee
I know.
Chick McGee
Maybe that.
Josh Arnold
But he wasn't last night.
Christy Lee
No. He could come to your house. You have no idea how you sound. Or maybe you do. I just don't care. And you don't care how many people are mad at you.
Chick McGee
It was the fourth time I've seen Santa.
Tom Griswold
Fourth time.
Josh Arnold
Way to ring the magic out of it.
Christy Lee
Yeah. Hey, let's recreate this moment.
Josh Arnold
Do we? We have to see Santa tonight.
Tom Griswold
That's what.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Josh Arnold
That's what you want your kids to say.
Chick McGee
They were very enthusiastic.
Tom Griswold
Now we have a happy winter solstice day. Oh, it's the shortest, shortest day of the year. Yeah.
Chick McGee
Okay.
Tom Griswold
But it's beginning of winter.
Christy Lee
It's not really, though, right? It refers to something else. I think. I think. I don't know.
Tom Griswold
It's the beginning of winter in the northern hemisphere and of summer in the southern hemisphere.
Chick McGee
Now, Christie was asking me if I knew what my elf name.
Tom Griswold
Do you know what your elf name.
Chick McGee
I do not. How does. Is there a formula?
Tom Griswold
There's a formula. Formula just like everything else. This is very old, but it's kind of cute. All right, so, Tom, you use the first letter of your first name.
Chick McGee
Check.
Tom Griswold
So that would be T. Okay. So your first name would be Sugar Plum. Oh, and the month you were born. So your last name would be Sugar Plum McJingles.
Christy Lee
Oh, that's cute.
Josh Arnold
Very cute. Sugar Plum McJingles.
Christy Lee
That's lovely.
Josh Arnold
Very good.
Chick McGee
That sounds like. That's like a name of someone who's not a felon.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Josh Arnold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
You're gonna trust Sugar Plum of jingles.
Christy Lee
Can I be like Peppermint? Hang down.
Tom Griswold
Let's find out. Candy cane, yours first starts. It starts with bubbles.
Christy Lee
Pepper Hang down, Bubbles.
Tom Griswold
Bubbles, you're in November, Right?
Christy Lee
Bubbles Dong. No, that wouldn't work, would it?
Tom Griswold
Yours is Bubbles. Monkey Buns.
Christy Lee
Bubbles. Monkey Buns.
Josh Arnold
Hey, Bubbles. Monkey Buns.
Chick McGee
How did monkey buns get into Christmas time? I don't know.
Christy Lee
Monkey buns doesn't sound like a name for an elf.
Josh Arnold
We used to make monkey bread. Something called monkey bread in homec. So maybe. Maybe it refers to that fine dessert.
Christy Lee
So Tom's was sugar plum.
Tom Griswold
Sugar plum.
Christy Lee
And mine's monkey buns.
Tom Griswold
Yours is Bubbles. Monkey Buns.
Chick McGee
That's a big red ass. Doesn't sound very Christmassy.
Tom Griswold
Here's yours.
Josh Arnold
What do you mean it's a red ass?
Tom Griswold
When are you born?
Josh Arnold
May.
Tom Griswold
May. Okay, so you are. Let's see. Pudding, pudding. Peppermint. Pudding.
Josh Arnold
Peppermint. That's delicious.
Christy Lee
See, that sounds. Why do I get stuck with monke by?
Tom Griswold
Let's see what pat would be. Pat. You are jingle. And you're a December, right?
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Tom Griswold
You're a jingle Pointy toes.
Josh Arnold
How about that?
Chick McGee
Again, very Christmassy, Ace. If you look.
Tom Griswold
Okay, Ace is. When's your. Oh, September. Perky Perky pickle pants for an elf.
Josh Arnold
Look at old perky pickle pants.
Christy Lee
Pickle pants. And what are you?
Josh Arnold
Christy.
Christy Lee
Kind of go together.
Tom Griswold
Let's see. I didn't look mine up. Mine is cookie Sugar plum.
Josh Arnold
Of course it is.
Chick McGee
See, that's. They're all good. Except chicks is weird.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, chicks is weird.
Christy Lee
Who had jingles?
Chick McGee
I was jingles. Yeah, your jingles Pantyhose was Jingles.
Christy Lee
Mr. Jingles. That mouse lived a long time.
Tom Griswold
He was Jingle Pointy toes.
Chick McGee
Oh, Pointy toes.
Josh Arnold
We're gonna get you out of here, Magic man. Don't you worry.
Pat Godwin
Like all the electricity is going off in my head.
Josh Arnold
Can you do something about this bladder infection?
Chick McGee
Perky pickle pants.
Tom Griswold
Yes, yes. Perky pickle pants.
Christy Lee
And mines. Bubbles, Bubbles, Monkey buns.
Tom Griswold
Monkey Buns.
Christy Lee
That's not an elf name. I demand to be re. Examined.
Chick McGee
It's not very Christmassy, but it's very sweet.
Josh Arnold
It's the monkey buns you have a problem with?
Christy Lee
Yes.
Josh Arnold
How about his youngest daughter's birthday? Birth month instead?
Tom Griswold
What? What is your younger daughter?
Josh Arnold
No chicks.
Tom Griswold
What's Ellie's birth month?
Christy Lee
July.
Tom Griswold
July. Oh, then you would be Bubble sugar blum.
Chick McGee
What do we got over there? Christy?
Tom Griswold
Holiday stories for you. A new survey reveals which pickup lines are most likely to work at your Christmas party.
Christy Lee
How about it?
Tom Griswold
All right, how about it?
Christy Lee
Now we're.
Chick McGee
Is this like any Christmas party?
Tom Griswold
You want to make out or What?
Chick McGee
The office Christmas party.
Josh Arnold
This has got to be a different non office Christmas party.
Tom Griswold
Let's just say a Christmas party. It doesn't say an office Christmas party, Tom.
Josh Arnold
Because those pickup lines would be different, I think.
Christy Lee
Did I tell. I've told you my Christmas party story. We went to a Christmas. First of all, it was at the owner's house, which was kind of odd. It wasn't off site or anything. And we're. We had a very nice dinner, and then all of a sudden the lights are turned down from somewhere. Somewhere. And we're all sitting in the living room and this performer comes out and sings like two or three Christmas songs. And it was pretty good. But it was a lady, actually, a gentleman dressed like a lady and just sang the hell out of some Christmas.
Josh Arnold
Oh, no kidding.
Christy Lee
It was. It was interesting.
Josh Arnold
That is interesting.
Christy Lee
But it was in someone's home.
Chick McGee
This was your very first radio station.
Christy Lee
Oh, no, no, no. This was a long time ago.
Chick McGee
Really?
Christy Lee
Yep. Very interesting, huh?
Chick McGee
Very unusual. It's certainly years ago.
Christy Lee
Certainly.
Chick McGee
Do you remember what songs were performed?
Christy Lee
I don't. I'm gonna say Sleigh Bells and Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer.
Chick McGee
I mean, was it the serious ones? Was it like Silent Night?
Josh Arnold
You think it was this person transitioning?
Tom Griswold
Was it a drag queen Christmas? Is that what we're doing?
Josh Arnold
So were there songs like. It's beginning to look a lot like a vagina.
Chick McGee
Thank you, Josh.
Christy Lee
I'm beginning to look a lot like Stephanie.
Josh Arnold
Balls.
Christy Lee
All right.
Chick McGee
What?
Christy Lee
That was one step too far.
Chick McGee
Okay.
Josh Arnold
Jingle Bells.
Christy Lee
What are you doing with your ball?
Chick McGee
Christine.
Tom Griswold
According to the poll conducted by bestcasinosites.net the standout pickup line was. Was. Aside from being sexy, what do you do for a living?
Josh Arnold
That. No, there's no way that works.
Chick McGee
That works. That's. That's number one.
Tom Griswold
18.6%.
Josh Arnold
Well.
Chick McGee
Really?
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Josh Arnold
What does the guy look like who's saying it?
Christy Lee
Where does. Where does. Hey, do this or you're going to get fired. Where does that come in?
Tom Griswold
Like, I don't think these are office pickup lines. I think these are just Christmas party in general. The second most successful pickup line. Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only 10. I see that one. Man, that's been around forever.
Chick McGee
Sally, that sounds like a country song.
Tom Griswold
15.1% success rate according to the site.
Chick McGee
Really?
Christy Lee
How much?
Chick McGee
15.
Tom Griswold
15.1.
Josh Arnold
Again, doesn't it? The person saying it, it plays a.
Christy Lee
Big role in 85% that it fails.
Tom Griswold
Right.
Christy Lee
All right.
Tom Griswold
A follow to buy. Is your name Google? Because you have everything I've been searching for.
Josh Arnold
These things, these are.
Chick McGee
These are jokey.
Josh Arnold
Ryan Gosling uses these lines. He has a 98% success rate. Paul Giamatti says these things.
Christy Lee
It's 12% and he ends up in jail.
Josh Arnold
Yeah, yeah. It's not. It's not.
Chick McGee
Didn't I see you on pornhub? You know, something like that. That's going to work. That's going to work.
Tom Griswold
For Ryan Gosling, the least successful of the bunch was. Do you have a map? I keep getting lost in your eyes.
Christy Lee
What about the classic FF or fight? Is that in there? No. Okay, never. Never mind.
Chick McGee
Maybe walk up to three women and say, ho, ho, ho. Oh, that's right. I'm talking to you ladies.
Tom Griswold
Oh, yeah, that's a good one.
Christy Lee
You always have. Talk to the ladies.
Chick McGee
Up next here on the Bob and Tom show, very educational. Removing a bathroom mirror, in case you need to know. And a ballroom blitz. It's all coming up in just a few minutes. Hang on. This is the Bob and Tom show.
Christy Lee
Did you know that parents rank financial.
Chick McGee
Literacy as the number one most difficult.
Tom Griswold
Life skill to teach?
Chick McGee
Meet greenlight, the debit card and money app for families. With greenlight, you can send money to kids instantly. Set up chores automate allowance and keep.
Christy Lee
An eye on your kids spending with.
Chick McGee
Real time notifications, kids learn to earn, save and spend wisely. And parents can rest easy knowing their kids are learning about money with guardrails in place.
Tom Griswold
Sign up for Greenlight Today@Greenlight.com.
Chick McGee
We are back. It's more the Bob and Tom show here. This is Christopher and the Bob and Tom studios. How about a segment, an educational segment here in case you need to remove a bathroom mirror. And how about a ballroom blitz?
Christy Lee
Where were we, Christy? Over there at the news desk, were we not?
Tom Griswold
Yes, we were. Where officials at a North Carolina middle school have removed the bathroom mirrors to provide prevent students from making TikTok videos.
Josh Arnold
Oh, yeah?
Tom Griswold
Yeah. According to the Alamance Burlington school system, the mirrors were removed from Southern middle school after students were caught making videos during class time. The district said that the school has since seen a drastic decrease in bathroom visits from students.
Josh Arnold
Hmm.
Chick McGee
Why in the bathroom?
Josh Arnold
That's where the mirrors are. But I wonder what the videos. Is there a trend or something?
Tom Griswold
A lot of TikTok videos are taken in a mirror. Yeah.
Josh Arnold
Really?
Tom Griswold
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Chick McGee
But it's not of some, you know, poor kid trying to use the toilet?
Tom Griswold
No, Tom, it has nothing to do with that.
Christy Lee
I don't think they have mirrors on the Back of the stall door, Tom.
Josh Arnold
Oh, they're going in the stall. No, no. What are they doing with the.
Christy Lee
Course not. He's muddying the water.
Josh Arnold
Okay. All right.
Tom Griswold
There. It's like a selfie video, if you will. But they use the mirror because they could get it's.
Chick McGee
Are they doing any of the classics, like, you know, coating the seat with Saran Wrap and.
Tom Griswold
No.
Josh Arnold
No.
Chick McGee
Oh, I see.
Josh Arnold
Cherry bombing the toilets and such.
Chick McGee
Yeah. Smoking weed in the boys room. That kind of thing. Birthing babies. You know, the stuff they usually do in middle school.
Tom Griswold
Oh, jeez.
Christy Lee
What are they asking? Smoking in the boys. You ever dead down down to your best girlfriend?
Chick McGee
Something like that. That.
Christy Lee
That just started the song. Hey, did ever have what a new D with.
Josh Arnold
That's right.
Christy Lee
Last girlfriend.
Josh Arnold
You're anti. It's the singer talking a little bit before.
Christy Lee
Just get to the song. Don't ask me any question.
Josh Arnold
Well, it doesn't burn.
Chick McGee
Well, you don't.
Christy Lee
Hey, do you ever have one of those days when you did Girlfriend?
Chick McGee
What about the ones. What if the music is chartered? What if they're doing, you know, like, are you ready?
Christy Lee
No. No.
Josh Arnold
You don't like that? Ballroom Blitz.
Christy Lee
Well, there might be a ball. Ballroom Blitz cottage.
Josh Arnold
Are you ready, Steve?
Tom Griswold
Ready, Andy? Yeah.
Josh Arnold
All right, fellas.
Christy Lee
I like the way the band talks during that one.
Josh Arnold
Yeah, it's kind of.
Chick McGee
So. So this is not a hard and fast rule.
Josh Arnold
What about, like a Thorgood? Talking about, you know, he. He has a long story before I.
Christy Lee
I like the Thoroughgood.
Josh Arnold
He gets away with it. Doesn't.
Christy Lee
Only because he uses a term like that. Don't confront me. As long as you have my rent money by next. It feels real.
Chick McGee
Off.
Josh Arnold
You like a count off.
Christy Lee
I don't like the count.
Chick McGee
I love a count.
Josh Arnold
You do?
Chick McGee
Favorite count off. Billy Joel.
Josh Arnold
Oh, yeah. Matter of trust.
Christy Lee
No, no, no, no.
Josh Arnold
I didn't care for uno do trace Catorce. 1, 2, 3, 14.
Christy Lee
Oh, I like Def Leppard's Count off of this guy. Ready, Steve?
Chick McGee
Andy?
Christy Lee
Yeah, m. All right, fellas. He said turn it up.
Josh Arnold
The song's awesome.
Christy Lee
Oh, it absolutely does.
Chick McGee
You do this sounds like T Rex.
Tom Griswold
Oh, I love T Rex.
Christy Lee
Tom's favorite thing. Nothing's new. Everything's based on something else.
Chick McGee
Very clearly, very clearly.
Tom Griswold
Who came first?
Josh Arnold
You ever seen Tales from the Crypt? Bordello of blood?
Chick McGee
No.
Josh Arnold
Dennis Miller with a Super Soaker filled with holy water, spraying down vampires to this song. It's one of the greatest things ever.
Chick McGee
Okay.
Christy Lee
What are they doing?
Chick McGee
All right, we're Gonna listen to the whole song.
Christy Lee
You can't turn it off now. It's started.
Josh Arnold
I'll play Fox on the Run.
Chick McGee
Oh, thank you very much.
Josh Arnold
You don't like Fox on the Run?
Christy Lee
No. Oh, that might be my biggest divide between like and. And. Because I like.
Chick McGee
I'm with you on that one chick. I do agree, but.
Christy Lee
Oh, well, listen how it starts.
Josh Arnold
It's a mess.
Chick McGee
No, I'm out.
Christy Lee
Listen to this. It's a mess.
Josh Arnold
It's noise.
Christy Lee
We can do this with the keyboard.
Josh Arnold
Did know that we just bought a kid a lot.
Tom Griswold
This a big 80s.
Josh Arnold
I go see Sweet today.
Chick McGee
I am still alive.
Josh Arnold
I'd hope I be the drunk.
Christy Lee
Oh, God, no. And they yell something. I don't know. Hi. Hi. Don't want to know your name. Yeah.
Josh Arnold
This song comes in. I've got a 40 of beer in each hand. Running down a dock and jumping into a lake.
Tom Griswold
Of course you do.
Chick McGee
I take it back. It isn't as bad as I thought.
Christy Lee
Well, now what?
Chick McGee
Bar Room Blitz is great.
Christy Lee
I don't. That doesn't sound anything like the. The T. Rex. That sound.
Chick McGee
No, no, no. But that other one.
Christy Lee
No. Bang on. Bang a gong. And. And Ballroom Blitz doesn't sound anything like that Jeepster.
Josh Arnold
Yeah.
Christy Lee
Yeah. He loves Jeepster.
Chick McGee
I love the song.
Christy Lee
Here we go. Get comfortable for the Jeep and your motor company. Go ahead.
Chick McGee
For those that work for the Jeep Corporation, I think it's time to bring back the Jeepster.
Tom Griswold
Looks like Sweet has a new album out there, Josh.
Chick McGee
Yeah. Any original members?
Tom Griswold
Isolation Boulevard.
Josh Arnold
What's it called? Path.
Chick McGee
Still Sweet.
Christy Lee
We're still Sweet. I don't care what you say.
Chick McGee
Maybe it's called Split Linda. The all new suite. And the. The safe suite. Okay, so this. This is all because they're taking the mirrors out of some middle school.
Tom Griswold
And yes, for TikTok videos.
Chick McGee
Can't pick your zits. No mirror?
Josh Arnold
No. You sure can't.
Chick McGee
Can you do it in your phone? Josh, do they still use. In the porno movies you watch, do they still have that kind of sort of bad music in the background?
Josh Arnold
Maybe some do. I prefer all natural. I don't like any music. Oh, they don't my porn.
Chick McGee
So, like, is this. Would this be good porn music here?
Christy Lee
I don't know where you.
Josh Arnold
Honestly, you know what? That sound, it sounds like somebody trying to make bad porn.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, it does.
Chick McGee
A little too heavy maybe.
Christy Lee
It sounds like awful music is what it sounds like to me.
Chick McGee
That kind of little Wawa chunky guitar.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Josh Arnold
I mean, if you were gonna make A parody. This would be good for that.
Chick McGee
Okay.
Christy Lee
You're gonna have a white.
Josh Arnold
But I don't want any music.
Chick McGee
Does most part of movies no longer have music?
Josh Arnold
I don't know. I just. I want the Natural Faps and Glucks.
Chick McGee
The sounds of love is. Oh, isn't the Natural Faps. Didn't they open for you when you toured with the Consensuals?
Josh Arnold
They did, yes.
Christy Lee
This is actual porno music from the one where Deep Throat. It's in Deep Throat. Yes. This definitely is in Deep Throat, this music. Wow. She's driving to the doctor's office, I believe right at the start of the.
Josh Arnold
It's got a little bit of ray.
Chick McGee
A little bit of. A little bit of shaft.
Tom Griswold
Kind of. Yeah.
Josh Arnold
Yep. Pretty interesting. It sounds. It makes you feel like you want to take a shower, doesn't it?
Christy Lee
A little bit.
Josh Arnold
It's asleep easy.
Chick McGee
It said heavy metal. This is interesting. Heavy metal fans the most likely to use condoms.
Josh Arnold
Ah.
Chick McGee
Is that price is surprising.
Christy Lee
There's something wrong with this survey.
Josh Arnold
I don't think it sounds very reading willy nilly. Like they just.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Tom Griswold
Only thousand people, so.
Josh Arnold
A thousand and ten.
Tom Griswold
That's right.
Chick McGee
Okay. Okay. Well, speaking of heavy metal, did you see the story about the pig?
Tom Griswold
People attending a metal concert in Texas say a severed pig's head was thrown into the the mosh pit.
Josh Arnold
What?
Tom Griswold
According to the lambgoat.com the incident took place at the White Swan live in Houston, which featured the band's devoured trachea.
Josh Arnold
All right.
Tom Griswold
Accosted Young Jit j I t t 79 stick, Big Pete, Martyrdom, Entropy and Two Timer.
Chick McGee
Have you ever heard any of those bands?
Josh Arnold
I have heard Martyr Martyrdom.
Tom Griswold
A video captured at the event shows someone tossing a pig's head into the mosh pit, leading to a mix of reactions from the crowd. One Twitter user reportedly commented on the video saying, I watched some of these kids licking on the pig head. Guts were splattered on people, diseases were spread. The band Martyrdom released a statement claiming responsibility for the stunt and apologizing to anyone they may have offended with their, quote, actions and gimmicks.
Chick McGee
How do you sneak a pig's head into a concert? I can barely get it in my wall.
Tom Griswold
The band is.
Josh Arnold
Yeah, they didn't have to. The band was able to bring it in.
Chick McGee
Oh, so they didn't have to. Prison pocket.
Josh Arnold
The thing a pig's head.
Tom Griswold
It's prison purse, not prison pocket.
Josh Arnold
Sorry.
Chick McGee
You just. Prison pocket.
Christy Lee
You're.
Josh Arnold
You're.
Christy Lee
You just hear what you want to Hear, don't you?
Chick McGee
This is why I enjoy bands like the Eagles. Cuz no one's throwing a live pig's head on the ground.
Josh Arnold
This is. This is rare. Rare. I've been to many metal festivals. This kind of thing doesn't. I mean, this sounds like they did.
Tom Griswold
It on purpose to get attention. Just we're talking about them. Right.
Christy Lee
You just be glad it's just the pig's head.
Josh Arnold
This sounds crazy. Hardcore.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, yeah.
Chick McGee
You like the mosh pit though?
Josh Arnold
I used to. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I like all that. I still like watching mosh pits because they're. They aren't about anger. They're about joy and fun. They're about really. The people in them are really laughing and having a good time, even though, man, they can get brutal. And girls, boy, some of the toughest girls I've ever seen. Jumping in those things, laughing, getting knocked to the ground, getting right back up. Because here's the thing also, if you watch a mosh pit, when somebody gets slammed to the ground, so many of the moshers help that person back up. It's not. It's not a hateful thing.
Christy Lee
This is your NHL. This is your hockey argument.
Josh Arnold
Yeah. You're just blowing off steam.
Christy Lee
Yeah. You're beating the hell out of each other during a fight. The only major sport that they encourage fighting.
Josh Arnold
They're not really. But yeah. Mutual respect.
Christy Lee
Right? Yeah. Bosch Pits. NHL.
Tom Griswold
Same thing.
Chick McGee
One of the bands, the band's Young Jit 79 Stick. Big Pete.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Chick McGee
Remember Big Peter?
Josh Arnold
What is it?
Chick McGee
It was. There was. There was the.
Christy Lee
I think the only thing there was ever got fined for.
Chick McGee
There was. Was no, there was a. There's a famous monster truck called Bigfoot.
Josh Arnold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
And Big Peter instead of Peterbilt.
Josh Arnold
Sort of.
Chick McGee
It was a giant Peterbilt. I saw it crushing into Revolver once at Market Square Arena.
Christy Lee
He didn't.
Josh Arnold
He didn't crush and enter a Volvo.
Chick McGee
Thank you, Jay.
Tom Griswold
Coming up, up, we have. If you're interested, the Oscar nominations were announced this morning. I don't know if you are, but we can review some of those and.
Josh Arnold
We'Ll look them up.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Chick McGee
Coming up next on the Bob and Tom show, old Barbie and Jess Hooker brings in Elvis sandwiches. But next, bad musicals. It's on the way in just a few minutes, so stand by. This is the Bob and Tom Show.
Tom Griswold
Is it time to reimagine your future? The right business skills may make a difference in your career. At Capella University, we offer a relevant education that's designed to focus on what you need to know in the business world. We'll teach professional skills to help you pursue your goals, like business management, strategic planning, and effective communication. And you can apply these skills right away. A different future is closer than you think. Think with Capella University. Learn more at capella.
Christy Lee
Edu.
Chick McGee
Welcome back. This is the Bob and Tom show. And this is Christopher here in the Bob and Tom studios with the best of Bob and Tom. Some great stuff on the way in just a few. How about a segment with some bad musicals? And grandparents Derby is coming up in.
Christy Lee
This segment, there's Ace Cosby. There's Willie Griswold.
Chick McGee
Good morning.
Christy Lee
What do you got there? Is that light green shirt? What is that, sage? What is that?
Josh Arnold
I think it's mint coral. Mint.
Chick McGee
A Kelly green or what are you.
Josh Arnold
Working with a Heather?
Chick McGee
It's.
Josh Arnold
It's from the.
Chick McGee
It's from Target, everybody.
Tom Griswold
Sage green, I think.
Christy Lee
Mint heather.
Josh Arnold
I'd like that. Yes. I. I stole this shirt from my friend Chris so I can text Chris. What are you wearing there? A stolen shirt?
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Josh Arnold
Did you abscond with that? My buddy Chris left it in my house.
Christy Lee
What is that? When kids start trading clothes? What is that about? He left it at my house.
Josh Arnold
And I said, this is my now, sucker. And I wear it every day. Yeah, you do.
Chick McGee
You know, you ever do that with some woman's brassier Chick?
Christy Lee
Keep the brassiere and wear it pretty.
Chick McGee
Putting it on?
Christy Lee
No. Do the old.
Chick McGee
Stand in front of a mirror. Do the tuck.
Christy Lee
What am I. What am I saying?
Tom Griswold
What are you saying?
Christy Lee
Of course I do.
Chick McGee
Maybe a little strategic shaving.
Christy Lee
Touch me. I feel pretty.
Josh Arnold
Wrap around your face when you sleep so you don't get lonely.
Chick McGee
Sure.
Christy Lee
I'm Chick, and here's Tom. And remember, here's Tom's favorite song.
Chick McGee
Don't you do that to me.
Josh Arnold
Hey, I can't wait until one of your young girls has the lead.
Christy Lee
Daddy, I want you at every rehearsal.
Chick McGee
Haven't they even stopped doing that in high school productions? Because it's such a bad play.
Josh Arnold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
No, they don't do it.
Josh Arnold
Boy, I had to sit through some stinkers. Carousel. You ever have?
Tom Griswold
Yes.
Josh Arnold
You ever try to stay awake through that?
Christy Lee
No. I'm gonna bring this to a halt. I got one word for you. Showboat.
Josh Arnold
Well, at least it's got. I had to watch that in Broadway. When our show choir took a trip to New York, we went and saw Showboat.
Chick McGee
Your show choir went to New York?
Josh Arnold
Yeah, to perform at the UN how.
Chick McGee
Many cherries came back?
Christy Lee
Wait a minute. Cherries came you were at the UN singing and dancing in your outfit.
Josh Arnold
It was brutal. No one cared. They were in the lobby of the UN building and these like dignitaries are walking by, going through metal detectors and stuff. Turn the be. Are you wearing a sequence vest by any chance? I think we accidentally caused four wars. Yeah, we were all dressed up young.
Chick McGee
Vladimir Putin. I ate the Medicaid. I attacked Ukraine. This pissed them off. God, that's just awful.
Josh Arnold
Ah, nobody said this is through Showboat. But Old Man River, I mean, come on, Josh.
Chick McGee
We did a play called Free to be, you and me. And it was just a series of.
Josh Arnold
Little songs sort of stuck together. They were all didactic. Told a. There was one song called William wants a Doll about a little boy named.
Chick McGee
William who wanted a doll. And I got cast as William.
Josh Arnold
Look at you pigeonholed again. And it was just a song about how badly I wanted a doll to give a bottle to and take to bed when the day is through. And anytime my doll gets ill, I'll take good care of it. That's my friend Will. And my friends made fun of me so much.
Christy Lee
And it's mil.
Josh Arnold
So they give your friends the afternoon off. They don't have to go to class so they can watch you and then have ammo to make fun of you the next day.
Christy Lee
Hey, hey. Where's your baby doll?
Chick McGee
This all started because of. This all started because Dolly Parton is releasing a rock album and they've I guess just released the one song with Dolly and Rob Halford.
Christy Lee
Hopefully that's all there is.
Tom Griswold
No, there's.
Chick McGee
I think.
Christy Lee
Right.
Chick McGee
There's another one out there already, I'm pretty sure. Okay, well we'll. We can dig into that but right now we do have to touch base base with a little bit of sports show.
Christy Lee
Hey, cool.
Chick McGee
World record.
Christy Lee
Speaking of shows, Broadway presentation show. Hey, Otani.
Josh Arnold
Hey, Ohtani.
Christy Lee
Thank you. Willie already knows he's headed to the All Star game in two weeks. It remains unclear though whether he'll take part in the home run Derby.
Josh Arnold
There's always a player that does this.
Christy Lee
I know. I don't know why. They just go ahead. You were going up there to swing at the. Oh, it throws off my swing now just. It's fun. Okay. The two way angel superstar leads the majors 28 home run including 13 this month. He became the first American League pitcher in 60 years to hit two home runs and strike out 10 batters in a game.
Josh Arnold
That's awesome.
Christy Lee
And a four to two one over the white Sox last night that he hurt his fingernail you know what?
Josh Arnold
I forgot? He's a pitcher. It kind of does make sense. Maybe he would have second thoughts, I guess.
Christy Lee
I don't know. Is he your favorite player or is it here come the Judge?
Chick McGee
Oh, they're both excellent at what they do. Making baseball exciting.
Christy Lee
Rumor Aaron Judge might not be back this season because he has a ligament in his big toe that's torn and he doesn't have a timetable.
Josh Arnold
I bet that hurts way worse than.
Christy Lee
Can you imagine the size of Aaron Judge's big toe?
Josh Arnold
No, man.
Christy Lee
It's as big as my, as big as Christy's arm probably.
Josh Arnold
It's got to be like a computer mouse.
Christy Lee
I guess the biggest problem though, when they heard his toe during the game and they went down into the trainer's room and they were taking a look at it, he took his sock off and he had painted all his toenails.
Josh Arnold
Yeah. It was a hunt sidling.
Christy Lee
Yeah. Because he's, you know, a man and he paints whatever he wants.
Chick McGee
He can maybe do the Yankee pinstripes on them for all I care.
Tom Griswold
Does he have little kids? Maybe they did it.
Christy Lee
I don't think he's married. He's high school girlfriend. I think one of those.
Tom Griswold
I don't have to be married to have kids. I don't know if I don't know about that.
Christy Lee
How does that work?
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Christy Lee
Cleveland guardians manager Terry Francone. Francoma, he's in the hospital.
Josh Arnold
Careful with that.
Chick McGee
On this story.
Christy Lee
Oh, come on. Hospitalized overnight for evaluation after feeling ill before last night's game against the Royals. Complained about the guardian's name before they took him to the hospital. Francona, 64. That's old.
Josh Arnold
Put him down.
Christy Lee
Put him down. University of Kansas health system is going to be a value. Francona is being evaluated out and of an abundance of caution. The quote goes Francona missed much of 20 and 21 due to a variety of physical issues. He was. He's just clumsy. He stubbed his toe. He walked on some Legos. He shot his hand in the car door. He. I made all of that.
Josh Arnold
Tripped over a bucket.
Christy Lee
He tripped over.
Josh Arnold
That was loud.
Christy Lee
Several times. And I'm going to do something I've never done before. I have a video presentation to go along with this story. This past weekend in Auburn, Washington, it's called Emerald Downs. Right outside of Seattle, a horse racing track had its first ever grandparents race on Sunday around 2025 grandmas and grandpas race to the finish line in a 40 yard dash. It's called the First Annual Grandparents Derby. There's the Starting gate. And they're gonna come rushing out of the grandparents. Here they come. Yes. Oh, no. Two down, two down, two fell down. And there's your winner.
Josh Arnold
Oh, wow, look at that.
Christy Lee
Look at all of them. That was. That's a fun time.
Josh Arnold
Right out of the gate, it's crooked dentures followed by soggy diaper, followed by.
Chick McGee
Oh, it's Paul Bearer.
Christy Lee
The guy who falls first. Go ahead and Google that on your own. It's called the grandparents derby.
Tom Griswold
Oh, that's outside of Seattle, Washington.
Chick McGee
Honestly, want to know something? What do you think that they had to buy special insurance to do that?
Josh Arnold
I don't know.
Tom Griswold
A release, I would think.
Josh Arnold
But I'm just so happy they had them start in the gate.
Christy Lee
Yes. Whoever. Whoever's idea is for a great idea and. But yeah, whoever added that little feature.
Chick McGee
I think this. I think this is going to take off. It's really funny.
Josh Arnold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
And there'll be ways to make it more humiliating for these people.
Josh Arnold
Well, I don't think that's the idea.
Chick McGee
They can make them wear silks.
Josh Arnold
I just like the gate. It hides what they're wearing. And then as soon as it opens. I've never seen so many people racing wearing slacks. They're wearing slacks and New Balances.
Christy Lee
Oh, God, that's slacks, New Balances and. And a golf shirt.
Chick McGee
I really do wonder, though, if. I mean, because there are a lot of things could go wrong.
Josh Arnold
Oh, sure.
Christy Lee
Well, two of them fell hard, right?
Chick McGee
Yeah. Two of them face plants.
Josh Arnold
I fell on my colostomy.
Christy Lee
The one looked like he pulled his hamstring.
Chick McGee
And a lot of them probably get. Get no exercise ever. All of a sudden they're sprinting, I assume.
Christy Lee
Well, they're not. Look, they're not. They're running as fast as volunteers.
Josh Arnold
They're not going, hey, you, granny, get in there.
Chick McGee
No, but you don't think someone who's completely out of shape isn't going to volunteer? I'm okay. They're going to be all, see, this is the thing.
Josh Arnold
This is why I'd watch that on television.
Christy Lee
Oh, yeah, Grandparent Olympics.
Chick McGee
Can you imagine? You go to go to an NFL game and at halftime, instead of having the one guy go out there, let's see if he can punt it from the 30.
Christy Lee
I'll catch a punt from the 40.
Chick McGee
We've brought out 40 grandmas and grandpas and they're going to run from the 50 to the gold line.
Tom Griswold
Would you have an age limit, though? Because there are some grandmas and grandpas that are 40.
Chick McGee
Yes, you know, we ran into that when we did our grandma picking against Chick McGee. Yeah, yeah. You got to have all of them over 70.
Tom Griswold
Got to.
Josh Arnold
Oh, no, 55.
Christy Lee
I don't think you can.
Chick McGee
I'm seeing two divisions. The fully abled, like they have a wheelchair division.
Josh Arnold
And what's the opposite of fully?
Chick McGee
I'm not sure what the current term is.
Josh Arnold
This come to mind.
Christy Lee
This.
Chick McGee
That.
Christy Lee
Is it like a halfway. They only have use of one side of their body. Something like that. Is that what you want? Is that what you want?
Chick McGee
Hope someone's writing these great ideas down.
Josh Arnold
And that's terrific.
Chick McGee
And then we have time for this obituary. And I asked Dean to prepare some obituary music. Christie. So this should give us the proper.
Josh Arnold
Putting the in obituary.
Chick McGee
All right, Dean, that's not funny.
Tom Griswold
Inventor, educator and Nobel prize winner John B. Goodenough has died at 100.
Josh Arnold
Johnny be good enough doctor good enough.
Tom Griswold
Best known for developing the lithium ion battery back in 1980.
Josh Arnold
No, he didn't.
Tom Griswold
He passed away Sunday, a month shy of his 101st birthday.
Christy Lee
His last name's really good enough.
Tom Griswold
Yep, all one word. His death was confirmed by the University of Texas at Austin, where he was a professor.
Chick McGee
Almost made it to 100.
Tom Griswold
Yep.
Chick McGee
Battery, inventor. He just kept going and going and going and then just stopped.
Christy Lee
This has been today's obituary brought to.
Chick McGee
You by Christy Lee's House of Joy.
Tom Griswold
Wait a minute.
Christy Lee
Remember our slogan?
Tom Griswold
Have you heard there's another one.
Josh Arnold
Nobody heard me say putting the in obituary.
Chick McGee
She.
Christy Lee
She heard you. And apparently you didn't see her face.
Tom Griswold
It was resting.
Chick McGee
You got. You got another one.
Christy Lee
Time down for an extra obituary.
Josh Arnold
I heard at that guy's funeral, the symbol playing rabbit gave the eulogy. The battery. Tom is laughing at the silence. I want everybody to know that.
Christy Lee
Oh, that joke is.
Chick McGee
You want to stick around? Because coming up next, Jess Hooker brings in some Elvis sandwich for us to try. They're good. It's coming up in just a minute here on the Bob and Tom show.
Christy Lee
If you've heard that sound from Babbel before, I bet you do.
Chick McGee
Babbel is the science backed language learning.
Christy Lee
App that actually works with quick 10 minute lessons handcrafted by over 200 language experts. Babbel gets you on your way to.
Chick McGee
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Christy Lee
With over 16 million subscriptions sold and a 20 day money back guarantee. Just start speaking another language with Babbel right now.
Chick McGee
Up to 55 off your Babbel subscription.
Tom Griswold
At babbel.com Spotify podcast spelled B A.
Chick McGee
B-B-E-L.com Spotify podcast rules and restrictions may apply. Back with more of the Bob and Tom Show. This is Christopher in the Bob and Tom Studios. Jess Hooker the cooker. One day, everybody wanted to try Elvis sandwiches, so she made some, brought them in, and here you go.
Christy Lee
Welcome back to the Bob and Top Show. It's bacon palooza. What is it with me and palooza?
Chick McGee
Here they come.
Josh Arnold
Look at this platter.
Christy Lee
Holy hell.
Josh Arnold
Jess Hooker has just walked in with a platter of sandwiches of some kind. They look like grilled cheese.
Chick McGee
I've got a handout here.
Josh Arnold
Okay.
Chick McGee
Apparently these are the famous Elvis sandwiches. Elvis's birthday was January 8th.
Tom Griswold
Ah.
Chick McGee
How old would the King have been, do we know?
Christy Lee
73.
Tom Griswold
Old.
Chick McGee
Significantly older than that, I think.
Josh Arnold
70, I believe.
Chick McGee
90, you mean.
Josh Arnold
How old is 90?
Tom Griswold
No, he was born in 60. No, no, he was born in 35, so do the math. Oh, jeez, I can't do that Math.
Josh Arnold
He's listening.
Christy Lee
89. See?
Josh Arnold
He listens to the show up in Michigan.
Tom Griswold
He's listening.
Chick McGee
Okay, now this is the famous Elvis sandwich. Two pieces of white bread, peanut butter on both slices of bread, sliced banana on top of the peanut butter.
Christy Lee
Did you say. Did you say what was on both slices of bread?
Chick McGee
Peanut butter on both sides of the bread.
Christy Lee
Wow. Yep. That's.
Josh Arnold
I've never had the Elvis. I love peanut butter and banana.
Christy Lee
Yeah, I've never had it with bacon either, but the secret is you have to fry it in the bacon grease.
Tom Griswold
You can't use chocolate.
Josh Arnold
Oh, no, I've never had it. I used. Always have. Just. I don't toast or fry the bread either on my peanut butter banana. So this is the first time.
Chick McGee
Don't you toast the bread before you fry it in the bacon?
Josh Arnold
Just tell him. You did. Just tell him.
Tom Griswold
You did?
Josh Arnold
Yeah.
Christy Lee
We talked to Elvis's cook, and she told us this.
Chick McGee
That was the secret. Well, have you tried one yet?
Christy Lee
No, I haven't.
Josh Arnold
She just walked.
Chick McGee
Well, she was cooking back there. She could have.
Christy Lee
No, I mean, I.
Josh Arnold
No, she doesn't cook the way I do. Well, I did sneak some bacon.
Tom Griswold
Of course you can't.
Christy Lee
You got to sneak bacon.
Josh Arnold
And it's Wonder Bread.
Christy Lee
Oh, my goodness. And it is Wonder Bread.
Josh Arnold
That's the way to go.
Chick McGee
Oh, wait.
Christy Lee
How could you tell what's Wonder Bread and what's not? Please enlighten me.
Josh Arnold
You went through the.
Christy Lee
When I walked in, I saw it there.
Chick McGee
Well, while you. While you pass those. While you pass out the Elvis sandwiches by request from Chick McGee. Ladies and gentlemen.
Josh Arnold
Hey, Dick.
Christy Lee
Yes, Ace? What do you call a bagel that can fly? What do you call a bagel that can fly? I don't know. What? A plane Bagel. Now here's a big fan of Elvis. Juice Newton. Oh, we're going deep. You hearing this, Tom?
Chick McGee
Unfortunately, yeah.
Christy Lee
Love's been a little bit hard on me.
Chick McGee
I got it. Subtle.
Christy Lee
What? Love's been a little hard on me.
Chick McGee
We got it.
Josh Arnold
Come on, Tom, you in the early 80s, sunbathing with the girls, listening, listening to that tune, waiting for Ralph Nader.
Christy Lee
To tell you what to do.
Chick McGee
You know that was me. Yeah, sure. Before all the Volvos.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Christy Lee
You know, I bet you if you play radio friendly music from the late 60s, 70s and 80s, I can name them in less than a second.
Tom Griswold
I bet you could.
Christy Lee
I bet I could.
Tom Griswold
You're really good.
Josh Arnold
What do you think is good?
Chick McGee
Well, I think both of us live through that era.
Christy Lee
I'm much better than you because I'll go, oh, that's love. No. Who is Alan O'Day Undercover Angel.
Chick McGee
Oh, oh, you mean.
Christy Lee
And you would go. Well, let me think for a second. Yeah.
Chick McGee
No, I was much more into what would be considered classic rock as opposed to the pop stuff that you had.
Josh Arnold
Well, let's take a bite of these sandwiches.
Chick McGee
Yeah. I want you to judge the. Once again, it's peanut butter, bacon and banana. It is in honor of Elvis.
Christy Lee
That's quite the bite. Grilled in bacon grease. I don't taste the banana. Okay.
Josh Arnold
I taste everything. And it's one of the greatest things I've ever had. Had in my life.
Chick McGee
But it's, it's. Once again, it's fried.
Christy Lee
I don't know.
Chick McGee
Fried in bacon grease.
Christy Lee
Yes, it is. Yeah. So you fry up the bacon first.
Josh Arnold
And then you assemble your sandwiches. Too good.
Christy Lee
Is it?
Josh Arnold
And I know it's going to hurt.
Christy Lee
Here's the thing, Jess.
Josh Arnold
Yeah.
Christy Lee
Ace is not pleased. You need to go and. Oh, it's, it's great. But I put more banana in.
Josh Arnold
Yeah.
Tom Griswold
Maybe somebody would like more bananas. Some would like less.
Josh Arnold
Away from me.
Tom Griswold
Get the bite that had the banana in it, Ace.
Christy Lee
Now you put each sandwich had, had, had eight slices of banana on it, identically prepared.
Josh Arnold
In my opinion, there's no way not to taste the banana.
Chick McGee
But so I. So take, walk me through this. You take two slices of white bread. You put peanut butter on them immediately.
Christy Lee
No, you don't pee on them. Yes, I put peanut butter on both.
Tom Griswold
Sides and I put the banana slices on it.
Christy Lee
And then.
Josh Arnold
You mean you didn't pee on mine.
Christy Lee
I didn't. Sorry. Take it back.
Tom Griswold
That costs more.
Christy Lee
And then.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, you put the fried bacon on top and that's it.
Chick McGee
Okay. It may be the greatest thing I've ever had in my life.
Josh Arnold
It's real good.
Chick McGee
Now I know why the King.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Chick McGee
Was a little beefy there at the end.
Christy Lee
Oh, you mean. I just have to say, give me one of them sandwiches.
Chick McGee
That's all I have to do.
Josh Arnold
That's an Elvis movie I'd watch.
Christy Lee
Chick McGee is Elvis. Give me more of them sandwiches.
Chick McGee
I. I kind. I'm with Ace.
Christy Lee
Yeah. Not enough banana.
Chick McGee
I get the texture of the banana.
Josh Arnold
Okay, but not enough.
Chick McGee
Just a hint of the.
Josh Arnold
You made Ace's day, man.
Christy Lee
He's never been happier.
Josh Arnold
If Jess didn't say there was a banana on there, I wouldn't sit. Oh, really? No.
Chick McGee
Yeah. I must have got the texture. But the peanut butter and the bacon are just a home run.
Christy Lee
I taste the banana. I taste.
Josh Arnold
I did, too.
Tom Griswold
I tasted it all. It was very good.
Chick McGee
Oh, you just are just trying to make her feel good.
Josh Arnold
It's so.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, that's it.
Josh Arnold
Whenever you ever tried to do that.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, around here. Come on.
Chick McGee
No, it's delicious.
Tom Griswold
It makes anybody feel good.
Chick McGee
It's way too good.
Christy Lee
Good.
Josh Arnold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
You start eating these, you're way too fat to get in your.
Christy Lee
What was that?
Josh Arnold
That's. Can't pronounce your R's.
Chick McGee
Fat. My mom used to make my dad peanut butter and bacon sandwiches, but she didn't fry them in bacon grease.
Christy Lee
You think that was the morning after they, you know, probably made love?
Josh Arnold
Why?
Christy Lee
It was kind of a thing where, you know.
Josh Arnold
Yeah, it was.
Chick McGee
Bruce, what did you have for Bretbert last night?
Tom Griswold
I could say something right now and I'd be fired in a second. Hang on.
Christy Lee
Let's hear her out.
Chick McGee
Let's move on, shall we?
Josh Arnold
Pat, if you're going to break your veganism, today's the day, my friend.
Chick McGee
Smells amazing. Any of this stuff?
Josh Arnold
I'm having a carrot, fried and avocado oil back here.
Christy Lee
I can't taste any carrot.
Josh Arnold
Thank you, Jess. And thank you.
Tom Griswold
Thank you. You're welcome.
Josh Arnold
Jason, he. He put this together this morning.
Chick McGee
Yeah, Just delicious.
Josh Arnold
Was it your idea?
Christy Lee
Which one's Jason?
Chick McGee
Have you been to Graceland?
Christy Lee
I've never been to gr.
Tom Griswold
No, I haven't been there either, either.
Christy Lee
I'd go, it's twice.
Josh Arnold
Yeah.
Tom Griswold
It's smaller than it. We all think, right?
Chick McGee
Much smaller.
Tom Griswold
It's like.
Christy Lee
Oh, and his. Is it Miss. Is it misspelled?
Josh Arnold
Misspelled.
Christy Lee
Yes. Like elders.
Chick McGee
Aaron.
Christy Lee
Because he's not in the tomb.
Josh Arnold
Okay.
Tom Griswold
That's right.
Christy Lee
I'm just saying.
Chick McGee
Yeah, there's. For example, he would. He sponsored local baseball teams.
Christy Lee
Oh, that's nice.
Chick McGee
Yeah, their uniforms have the really high collars in the sequins. Somewhat disappointed they didn't have that.
Christy Lee
Well, he loved his mama, didn't he? I mean, he really loved his mama.
Josh Arnold
Do you remember Drew Carey's old joke of. Yeah. Elvis is buried in his backyard. No wonder they call him King.
Christy Lee
Oh, I like a dog.
Josh Arnold
That's a great joke.
Tom Griswold
Do you have to get special permission to get buried in your back backyard?
Josh Arnold
I think so, yeah.
Christy Lee
State to state.
Josh Arnold
Yeah. You're not. Yeah.
Chick McGee
Why?
Josh Arnold
Are you thinking about it? No, why? Does Andy do something?
Chick McGee
Yeah, how's that?
Tom Griswold
It's only been a week.
Christy Lee
Sounds like you got those insurance concerns all squared away.
Chick McGee
All right.
Josh Arnold
That's why you were asking if I had a lie guy.
Tom Griswold
Just kidding.
Christy Lee
Because you need to dig a hole. Have the whole red. Because if somebody comes along, you have to dig another hole.
Josh Arnold
Oh, that's good. Weak at best, witless, sometimes low hanging fruit. Tastes real sweet, right?
Christy Lee
Hell yeah.
Chick McGee
Let's see. We'll get away from juice. You know what, they called her that, don't you?
Josh Arnold
No.
Christy Lee
Why did she. She's juicy.
Chick McGee
Oh, yeah.
Christy Lee
Oh, hell yeah.
Chick McGee
But she had those juice pants.
Christy Lee
That's where they.
Chick McGee
Yeah, the juicy on the butt.
Christy Lee
That's where they got the idea. It was.
Chick McGee
That was subtle. At the mall, going down the escalator. I love that 15 year old in front of you. Oh, this is awkward.
Josh Arnold
Oh, you went 15, huh?
Tom Griswold
2015.
Chick McGee
I was thinking about Elvis and Priscilla. Should have gone 14.
Christy Lee
Well, but in their defense, they were in Germany. Okay.
Chick McGee
Right, Jess Hooker. Thank you so much, Jess, for making the Elvis sandwiches. Are we gonna post this recipe?
Christy Lee
Yeah, we can now. And.
Chick McGee
And Chick was kind of mocking me. But I did hear an interview with kind of Elvis's cook and she said when you do make this recipe, you're supposed to make toast out of the bread and then deep fry it in the bacon.
Josh Arnold
That's a good idea. What?
Christy Lee
Whatever.
Josh Arnold
You did perfect.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, it was very good.
Chick McGee
I think as a general rule, deep frying anything in bacon grease, it's gonna taste good.
Christy Lee
Yeah. We had a container, like, I wanna say a coffee cup on our stove when I was a kid and it.
Tom Griswold
Was full of bacon grease, as did we.
Christy Lee
We had an old coffee can and it sat out all the time. And if you made egg, well, hell, if you made anything. You used bacon grease?
Josh Arnold
Sure.
Christy Lee
That bacon grease, right? Yeah. I don't know why all my arteries quit when I was 29.
Josh Arnold
Sometimes there were things. Things in it, like the black.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Josh Arnold
Yeah.
Tom Griswold
Yep.
Josh Arnold
But yeah, you. That was our. That was your cooking oil, essentially.
Tom Griswold
Your mom didn't do that?
Chick McGee
Yeah. Oh, absolutely.
Tom Griswold
Oh, yeah.
Christy Lee
She had bacon grease.
Chick McGee
Yeah, sure, and that.
Christy Lee
But. And that's right after they made sweet, sweet love. Oh my God. She would fix them.
Chick McGee
Did you just take ah, sauce this morning and douche your entire body?
Christy Lee
How do you think you got here, buddy?
Josh Arnold
So you're picturing like Tom's mom's sliding a plate in front of her. His dad. You were. You earned this, big boy. You made the bacon.
Christy Lee
Thanks again.
Chick McGee
Yeah, that's right.
Christy Lee
Thanks again. Hun. Hun.
Chick McGee
What I was trying to say was peanut butter and bacon is an absolute classic.
Josh Arnold
Yeah, it is.
Christy Lee
Good.
Chick McGee
Now, have we finished our sports games?
Christy Lee
Not yet. Stupid world record. Well, actually, we have to do something else before we do. Stupid world record. Hard on me.
Josh Arnold
Hard on you? Almost had coffee all over.
Christy Lee
Oh, spit a little bit.
Josh Arnold
Boner on me. Josh said boner.
Chick McGee
Yeah, somehow erase that.
Tom Griswold
These are in fourth grade, huh?
Josh Arnold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
We're gonna graduate though.
Josh Arnold
Yeah.
Tom Griswold
Oh, yeah. Yeah.
Christy Lee
I don't know what you mean.
Josh Arnold
My girlfriend's gonna come in from Canada for.
Tom Griswold
Oh, yeah. Okay.
Josh Arnold
She's real. She's real.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Christy Lee
Oh, a girl. They have cooties.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Josh Arnold
She let me touch her right boob. Her left one's off limit. She said the left one I can only touch after we get married. The right one's on.
Tom Griswold
You just got the look.
Christy Lee
Yeah. You see the face on him? That's the.
Josh Arnold
Yeah, but it's directed at you.
Chick McGee
Oh, I know enough. Juice Newton.
Tom Griswold
Juice is going. Hey, what I Do you know what you did, Juice?
Josh Arnold
You made great music for all of us to enjoy.
Christy Lee
Here's the thing. Everybody listening to me, right? Right now go find Juice Newton's website and tell her we said hello.
Josh Arnold
I love. I love you guys don't like angel in the Morning?
Christy Lee
I always thought that she. Dolly Parton wrote that.
Josh Arnold
Yeah. Somebody else did it before her.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Chick McGee
I thought it was a huge hit.
Josh Arnold
You're so lovely and so just sweet.
Christy Lee
It's a huge.
Chick McGee
It was a gigantic hit.
Tom Griswold
Oh, hit.
Josh Arnold
Well, you did say Dolly Parton. I see where.
Chick McGee
Okay, can we return it to something? A modicum of wit.
Christy Lee
Stupid world record. A man from the Czech rep area. Man from the Czech Republic has earned the Guinness World Record title for the largest collection of Lego sets. Yeah.
Josh Arnold
This is more fun than Juice Newton.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Christy Lee
Really? What about Bonnie T. Bright Eyes? What's that?
Tom Griswold
Oh, I love that. Turn around.
Chick McGee
Of the Heart.
Christy Lee
There it is.
Josh Arnold
Yeah.
Christy Lee
Is it Bonnie Tyler?
Chick McGee
And Is that. Isn't that the one? I. I used to always let it. A string of curse words, and then that ended up being in, like, the Adam Sandler movie. Was that Wedding Singer?
Christy Lee
Come down. Come down the ladder. Change the radio station.
Chick McGee
We had to. I. We're right. We had to play that song.
Josh Arnold
Oh, God, yeah. That's another good one.
Christy Lee
Do you have any guilty pleasures? I mean, I know you're on the cutting edge of all.
Chick McGee
Many, many.
Christy Lee
Oh, I know you like dual Lipa or whatever.
Josh Arnold
What's your favorite bad song?
Chick McGee
I'm lifting, maybe 1, 2, 3. Red light.
Christy Lee
I shoplifted that. You guys know that?
Josh Arnold
Yes.
Christy Lee
Yeah, I shoved it right down the front of my pants.
Josh Arnold
How'd that feel?
Christy Lee
Well, I came.
Josh Arnold
No, I meant just the.
Tom Griswold
What is wrong with you?
Christy Lee
There it is. What? I don't think they heard me.
Chick McGee
I was four.
Josh Arnold
But that song's fine.
Christy Lee
You were not four.
Tom Griswold
Not four.
Josh Arnold
There's nothing wrong with that song.
Chick McGee
No, I know. It's just a cute little song.
Christy Lee
What about Yummy?
Chick McGee
I like it when Hendrix redid it.
Josh Arnold
Little edge, long solo there in the middle.
Christy Lee
You know what's a good song that I just heard a couple days? Pleasant Valley Sunday.
Tom Griswold
It is good.
Christy Lee
By the Monkeys.
Josh Arnold
The Monkeys have a lot of good stuff. That's why they influence the Beatles so much.
Chick McGee
All the Monkeys had great writers. Neil Diamond.
Christy Lee
Can you find Pleasant Valley Sunday over there? I'd really like to.
Chick McGee
I don't have time for it right now.
Josh Arnold
Well, in lieu of Pleasant Valley Sunday, I guess we'll just have to play.
Chick McGee
Thank you very much.
Josh Arnold
Juice is not aged well.
Tom Griswold
Oh, she has.
Chick McGee
She's right.
Josh Arnold
She's called Drake.
Tom Griswold
Right.
Christy Lee
Well, so much for her coming in to being on the show.
Tom Griswold
Oh, j. She's like, what have I done to these people?
Chick McGee
I.
Pat Godwin
Well, no one does.
Chick McGee
When was her last hit? 85.
Tom Griswold
She's pretty.
Christy Lee
Pretty old.
Chick McGee
Remember she. I remember she had a great deal of hair.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, she has a lot of hair.
Chick McGee
She looks gorgeous in the photograph I'm looking at.
Josh Arnold
Yeah, I see.
Chick McGee
Well, she looks absolutely beautiful. Oh, yeah. That's a lot of hair. Hair. Wow. Put your clothes on.
Josh Arnold
Did you put. Did you put 20, 24 in your search?
Christy Lee
And so it showed a. I'm on her website. Okay.
Josh Arnold
Watching Juice with her fans. Is she performing anywhere?
Christy Lee
No, I don't see any Tour dates.
Chick McGee
All right.
Christy Lee
Well, hopefully this summer.
Josh Arnold
Get out there, Juice.
Chick McGee
She's very pretty. I don't know. Now.
Tom Griswold
Good song.
Chick McGee
This is Pleasant Valley Sunday.
Christy Lee
Nope. It's Pleasant Valley Sunday.
Chick McGee
Are you playing it through a transistor radio?
Tom Griswold
Mickey Dolan's, right.
Christy Lee
Nope. Only this is the album version. Seven minutes. Is that okay?
Josh Arnold
Another Pleasant Valley hard off. Yeah, The Moment Monkeys are good. They're real good.
Chick McGee
Yeah, they have great songs.
Christy Lee
They try to. On the video of Pleasant Valley Sunday. They try to. They don't come right out and say it, but it. The implication is Peter Torque is playing the piano during Pleasant Valley Sunday.
Josh Arnold
Oh, I see.
Tom Griswold
That's the implication.
Christy Lee
That would be the.
Chick McGee
He was the better guitar player.
Christy Lee
I thought Mike Nesmith was a better guitar player.
Chick McGee
Mike Nesmith will would have.
Christy Lee
Remember when Peter Torque was in here and he played that awful song? He wouldn't stop playing it.
Chick McGee
Peter was a nice guy.
Tom Griswold
That's not his real name.
Josh Arnold
Right, Peter.
Chick McGee
Peter Torkelson.
Josh Arnold
Right, right.
Christy Lee
It used to be Richard Twisterson. Right.
Chick McGee
Dick Twister. Boy, that's a. That's a Dick Twister. Is similar to the. The distaff version of that, which begins with a T. We have a tribute to that coming up, actually.
Christy Lee
A twister.
Josh Arnold
Which part?
Christy Lee
A lady twister or a gentleman's twist?
Chick McGee
A lady twister.
Christy Lee
We can get to that. A lady twister.
Chick McGee
And I think the. The world record Lego guy sounds like an idiot.
Josh Arnold
Oh, yeah. He is the most.
Tom Griswold
I totally forgot about that.
Christy Lee
Hard.
Chick McGee
Okay, we got him.
Christy Lee
Welcome to the show. Tommy, finally.
Chick McGee
Pull up a chair.
Christy Lee
You sit right down, buddy. Yes, sir.
Chick McGee
Coming up next on the Bob and Tom show, old Barbie checks in. Plus a stupid world record. Maybe two, maybe three. This is the Bob and Tom Show.
Christy Lee
Hi there.
Tom Griswold
I'm Nicole Khalil, host of this is.
Chick McGee
Woman's Work, where together we're redefining what it means, what it looks and feels like to be doing woman's work in the world today. From boardrooms to studios kitchens to coding dens, we explore the multifaceted experiences of today's woman, confirming that the new definition.
Tom Griswold
Is whatever feels true and right and real for you. We're torching the old playbook and writing our own rules.
Christy Lee
Who runs the world? You decide.
Tom Griswold
Follow and listen to this is Wooms.
Christy Lee
Work, part of the Believe Network on your favorite platform.
Chick McGee
Glad you're back. This is the Bob and Tom Show. And this is Christopher in the Bob and Tom Studios. More of the best of the Bob and Tom Show. How about a segment where old Barbie checks in And a stupid world record on the way. Right now, on the big screen, we've been joined by.
Josh Arnold
That's right, Bob and Tom. It's Bobby from bulk of Florida Barbie Living Center.
Chick McGee
Nice to see you, Barbie.
Josh Arnold
Looking good. Oh, I'm in my mid-70s. As you can tell, old age has not been kind to old Bob here. Well, I just had my upper left wax three days ago. It's already back with a vengeance.
Chick McGee
Tom Selleck would be jealous. That's a stash.
Christy Lee
Thank you.
Josh Arnold
Taylor Swift back in the news. Half the world loves her. Your father hates her. You almost wish the Kardashians. While I am not a swifty, I do own two swifter sweepers. One for everyday messes and one for when I piddle on the floor from laughing too hard watching young Sheldon. Oh, Barbie.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Josh Arnold
Personally, I think it's great Taylor and Travis are together. Before he was married. I once went out with Travis's brother Jason. Really? Oh, the man is gifted. Oh, if he's ever in prison, he could just use that thing to pull vault over the fence, so to speak. Yeah, let's just say Bobby was living high on the hog for those three weeks. Oh, my gosh, I gotta run. They just opened the omelet station and I am not getting stuck behind Juice Newton again playing with the Queen of hearts. You're playing with Bobby's patience, Juice Newton. Your name sounds like a Welch's grape banged a cookie from the 80s. Make your selection and move on. The line's already backed up to the oatmeal station. Let's go already. What was that?
Christy Lee
Juice?
Josh Arnold
Oh, Bob and Tom. Juice just gave me the finger. Time for Barbie to go throw some hands.
Christy Lee
All right.
Chick McGee
Thank you, Barbie. Nice. Lovely. Okay. Welcome back.
Christy Lee
I think Barbie tipped over there.
Josh Arnold
I think her hair got caught in the chair. Rough exit.
Christy Lee
Stupid world record. A teenager from India has broken the Guinness world record for the most languages sung in a concert.
Josh Arnold
Oh, really?
Christy Lee
Most languages sang in a concert? Sung in a concert. So how many sing sang song songs? Okay, song blue. Everybody knows one. I love that the teenager's name Ms. Ms. Period Ms. Is suck a. Suck a try. So she. So. So she what? S u. Yeah. C h e t. Let's suck it. H a. Suck it.
Josh Arnold
Huh?
Christy Lee
Suck it off. Last name sad.
Chick McGee
Just blast through a like know what you're doing.
Christy Lee
Satish. S a T I S H. Satish.
Chick McGee
Now what'd she do now?
Josh Arnold
She sang a song with the most languages.
Christy Lee
Sang in an. Impressive. Hang on a second. Okay, sang in 140 different languages to raise awareness about climate change.
Josh Arnold
And who's this Mrs. Suffering Suck Attack?
Christy Lee
18 year old's 9 hour long concert.
Tom Griswold
Oh, boy, that had to be fun.
Chick McGee
Parents, an award for having to deal with that.
Josh Arnold
How old did you say?
Tom Griswold
18.
Christy Lee
18.
Chick McGee
Hey, Suchetta's in the basement singing in Spanish again.
Josh Arnold
What, you upset about the closets?
Chick McGee
Hey, this next. She's. Now she's singing in Klingon.
Josh Arnold
This year it was foggier. Half a percent more than it was 20 years ago.
Chick McGee
Hey, she's singing in Pig Latin.
Christy Lee
I like pig Latin.
Josh Arnold
That's Esperanto.
Chick McGee
I wonder if. I wonder if that was in there. Is there still some college professor that is clinging to Esperanto as the savior of all culture?
Josh Arnold
And I hope so.
Chick McGee
We're all gonna get together. We're all gonna start speaking Esperanto, right?
Christy Lee
What's.
Tom Griswold
What's Esperanto?
Josh Arnold
It was meant to be like a universal language.
Tom Griswold
Okay?
Chick McGee
To get everybody to get together and.
Josh Arnold
We would all learn it.
Christy Lee
Come on, people, People.
Chick McGee
Now, instead of. Instead of speaking English, we'd have to speak Esperanto, right?
Tom Griswold
Does anybody speak.
Chick McGee
I'm just asking. There's nothing. There's some, you know, jackass that didn't catch on like the Euro, you know, still, still trying to do We Are the World in Esperanto. English.
Christy Lee
Do you speak it? The guidelines of the record say that each song must be at least 2 minutes long and allow for a 5 minute break each hour.
Chick McGee
Maybe she cheated. She did several instruments. Instrumentals.
Josh Arnold
Oh, man.
Chick McGee
That is instrumental in Greek. Well, then here's. I've got some of the. No, this is real.
Christy Lee
No.
Chick McGee
Yes. Here we go.
Christy Lee
Oh.
Chick McGee
What language is.
Christy Lee
We know.
Josh Arnold
Maybe some kind of Farsi or.
Christy Lee
What is wrong with him?
Chick McGee
This isn't bad.
Josh Arnold
No, it's not.
Christy Lee
Yeah, it is.
Josh Arnold
Here we go.
Christy Lee
Oh, that's a mouse singing.
Josh Arnold
That's nice.
Chick McGee
This sounds.
Josh Arnold
This reminds me, I would go to my. My. One of my best friends, Brijule. I'd go to his family's for dinner.
Tom Griswold
Yes.
Josh Arnold
And this kind of music would be playing and we'd be eating wonderful Indian meal.
Chick McGee
Okay.
Josh Arnold
That was the only one.
Chick McGee
You said India. I don't know.
Josh Arnold
Yeah, I mean, that's what. That's just what it sounds like.
Chick McGee
I thought it was. The cool part is when she decided to sing in English. I thought her choice of this song was great.
Josh Arnold
That would be so fun.
Chick McGee
Ladies and gentlemen.
Christy Lee
Ladies and gentlemen, the Rivingtons.
Chick McGee
Come on, babies.
Christy Lee
Babies understand a single word.
Tom Griswold
A little loud.
Chick McGee
First record I ever bought. Why the Name of the band, Pat?
Josh Arnold
I don't know.
Christy Lee
You just said it.
Chick McGee
The Rivingtons.
Christy Lee
You just said the Rivingtons.
Chick McGee
And I. I met. I met a couple, this is true, that had named their kid Rivington. And I said. Oh, did you name him after the great band the Rivingtons? They never even heard of it.
Josh Arnold
Can you believe it? They'd never heard heard of it.
Christy Lee
They'd never heard of a marginal song from 70 years ago.
Josh Arnold
They have a follow up hit.
Christy Lee
That's insane.
Chick McGee
That's a great song.
Josh Arnold
I prefer the Trash Men's homage to that, but.
Chick McGee
No, no, no, no, no. That's the original. The OG as the kids say.
Josh Arnold
The Trashman's the original.
Tom Griswold
No, no, no, no.
Chick McGee
That's what I'm saying.
Josh Arnold
Yeah, the Trashman.
Chick McGee
Those lyrics are better than lyrics. Any song by that band, America, you played before.
Josh Arnold
I totally disagree.
Chick McGee
Wonderful. The lizards in the air. And there's something.
Josh Arnold
Character.
Tom Griswold
Because it was cold and they were falling out of the trees.
Chick McGee
Okay, so this lady sings in 140 languages.
Christy Lee
Good for her.
Josh Arnold
That's a skill.
Christy Lee
Yeah, yeah, she does. And what we're subjected.
Tom Griswold
What do you mean?
Josh Arnold
In what way? She knows all these languages. She has a good voice.
Chick McGee
Okay, you're an overachiever. Thanks. Next.
Josh Arnold
Yes, that's right. Let's keep promoting the underachievers.
Christy Lee
I think we should Gibberish. Gibberish.
Josh Arnold
Me or her?
Tom Griswold
Her.
Christy Lee
I'm singing. Okay.
Chick McGee
Is that. Is that sports? Is that sports?
Christy Lee
Yes, sir.
Tom Griswold
This is what you parted for, where.
Christy Lee
You go, whatever you do, always.
Chick McGee
Next.
Christy Lee
Be a good sport.
Chick McGee
Yes, sir.
Josh Arnold
How much would you pay? Remember, one of your favorite bits is Curly in a dress singing opera.
Chick McGee
Yeah, I. It's the Three Stooges. He goes.
Tom Griswold
Sounds like Joel.
Josh Arnold
Would you pay to see Chick do that in front of 20,000 thousand people?
Chick McGee
I'd pay to see him do it in front of a hundred in a dress.
Christy Lee
You pay me and I'll do it in a big.
Chick McGee
Remember, he's got the big wig on and he's. Oh, it's so. That's.
Josh Arnold
And you have to sing just like you just were.
Christy Lee
That's right.
Chick McGee
I'm trying. That's. That's the melody. More or less. That's one of the funniest things I've ever seen.
Christy Lee
Is that right?
Chick McGee
I still remember it from being a kid.
Josh Arnold
Oh, I love it too.
Christy Lee
There are so many funny things out there. And you two are holding on to that. Are parked at the Three Stooges, a.
Chick McGee
Stout man pretending to be a woman in front of A bunch of a.
Christy Lee
Stout man pretending to be a woman.
Chick McGee
And thumbing his nose. Yes, thumbing his nose at the. At the. At the super rich upper crust. Oh, God, that's so funny.
Josh Arnold
Yes.
Chick McGee
A pie fight. Oh, how can you not laugh at the Three Stooges?
Josh Arnold
I love a pie fight.
Christy Lee
I find it incredibly easy.
Tom Griswold
Have you been in a pie fight?
Josh Arnold
I haven't.
Christy Lee
You know. That's right. She brings up a good point. You wouldn't think that.
Tom Griswold
What if the two of you have a pie fight?
Chick McGee
I had to film that TV commercial. I got pies in the face for three hours.
Josh Arnold
Oh, that's right.
Christy Lee
Tell you what. Until you've been in a pie fight and your best friend taken down by a lemon meringue.
Chick McGee
Yeah, you. That. You take that goo and wipe it off his face.
Christy Lee
You stick your hand in his face and you just.
Chick McGee
A bunch of goo. You. You're going to love the part where we cram the watch up your ass. Is that the same movie?
Tom Griswold
Why are they putting a watch off his.
Josh Arnold
He's getting his war stories.
Christy Lee
George C. Scott and Pulp Fiction somehow.
Chick McGee
Oh, I'm sorry. Those two different movies. Okay, great.
Josh Arnold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
You've seen, you've seen Pat.
Tom Griswold
I haven't seen either of those films. No.
Chick McGee
What? And I say you've never seen.
Tom Griswold
No, I don't like. You know me. I don't like gore or violence or war or.
Christy Lee
You don't like Al Gore?
Tom Griswold
I didn't say that. Oh, I like puppy dogs and rainbows.
Christy Lee
Everything's gonna be fine. Yeah.
Tom Griswold
Oh, the rose colored glasses. That's how I look my life.
Chick McGee
Gloved H.J.
Christy Lee
A nice glove day. That's right.
Chick McGee
Is that a character's name? H. H.J. glover. Next hour on the Bob and Tom show, we'll talk about the Rock and Roll hall of Fame and some rockets. But coming up in just a minute, let's have period sex chocolates. What? It's on the way in just a minute. On the Bob and Tom show.
Josh Arnold
You.
Tom Griswold
Met Lala Kent on Vanderpump Rules. Now Lala and her friends share everything on Give them Lala Bagel. Everybody says, I say that weird. It has ruined my proposal story.
Christy Lee
How Jason proposed and she was like, he brought in a bunch of bagels. I was like, I have to stop this.
Tom Griswold
I will punch you in the throat if you ever tell this story again and call it a bagel. Let me tell you now, when I.
Chick McGee
Tell the story, I go. He went and got breakfast.
Christy Lee
This is scary. You go.
Chick McGee
Bagels.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Tom Griswold
Watch what Lala is talking about on YouTube or search for give them lala wherever you listen.
Chick McGee
Welcome back now to more of the Bob and Tom Show. This is Christopher in the Bob and Tom Studios. Hey, let's have some period sex chocolates is coming up in this segment.
Tom Griswold
Chick's having a horrible morning.
Christy Lee
I just tried to open my second Diet Pepsi in a cat can, and the tab that you pull, it snapped off the can again. Again.
Josh Arnold
Now, Tom, I don't know if you saw the first one.
Chick McGee
He did it.
Josh Arnold
It literally shot across the studio.
Tom Griswold
I almost did. Ace.
Christy Lee
I need a what? A church key or whatever to open the.
Chick McGee
Just take a screwdriver, punch that thing out.
Christy Lee
Well, I was trying to do it with a Sharpie.
Josh Arnold
No, no, no.
Christy Lee
What is this dangerous? You think?
Chick McGee
Here, use my scissors.
Christy Lee
Okay, ready?
Josh Arnold
I.
Christy Lee
You would. You would throw scissors.
Chick McGee
I thought he was gonna throw at.
Christy Lee
Your oldest and dearest friend.
Josh Arnold
Wouldn't you?
Chick McGee
He's not here.
Christy Lee
Hey, Oscar.
Chick McGee
Here we go. Now Christie's got. You can punch that out.
Josh Arnold
I don't know about this.
Christy Lee
I don't know about this.
Chick McGee
It's gonna squirt.
Christy Lee
I'm gonna wait.
Tom Griswold
Okay.
Christy Lee
Find me an opener.
Chick McGee
Speaking of squirting.
Christy Lee
Okay, I'm. I.
Chick McGee
My attention, my favorite news story. Christy, can you do the. The special Valentine's Day? This is. I. I thought this was a joke when I read it.
Tom Griswold
Kotex is releasing a special box of chocolates for Valentine's Day with the theme the menstrual period. Kotex partnered with the food brand Fazee to create the let's have period sex chocolates, which include five truffles made with vegan dark chocolate and shataravi. I don't know what that is. An alleged libido boosting.
Josh Arnold
Oh, it's not like strawberry, orange, raspberry or whatever.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, Ayurvedic. Herb. Herb.
Chick McGee
But I think you're missing the larger point here. This stuff is called let's have period sex chocolate. Yeah, yeah.
Tom Griswold
People have sex on their period. Dumb.
Chick McGee
I. I'm fully aware of that. I'm just saying that I don't think.
Christy Lee
You are aware of that.
Tom Griswold
No. The heart shaped box.
Chick McGee
You don't think I own black towels?
Tom Griswold
The heart shaped box of chocolates available were $35 from let's have periodsex.com.
Christy Lee
Let me ask you this. As you would say, do you know what the term get your red wings means?
Chick McGee
Well, contextually, I think I can guess.
Christy Lee
Okay. Play football. Play football.
Josh Arnold
Play football. That's what you call it?
Christy Lee
I don't get that.
Josh Arnold
There's a term that used to be football. I won't complete it.
Christy Lee
Okay, you try and open.
Josh Arnold
Is it something about the red zone? Oh, no, no.
Chick McGee
Okay. Well, I. I'm. I just. It's astonishing that the Kotex people have a.
Tom Griswold
Well, they're not really talking about it much. They've been very discreet. The chocolates do not appear on the company's website. Instead, it's only being promoted in the official U Bite Kotex video posted on YouTube last week.
Josh Arnold
Okay.
Chick McGee
It's called letter U, U by Kotex.
Christy Lee
No, it's E, W, E. It's a female shape that makes.
Josh Arnold
Oh, that's very soft. Kotex.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Tom Griswold
The video includes a woman insane. Roses are red. Oh, so's my periods are, too. Oh, but don't let that stop you from having sex with your boo.
Josh Arnold
Wow. All right.
Chick McGee
Could have made that little. It's a little clumsy.
Josh Arnold
Yeah.
Tom Griswold
Do you want to rewrite that, Pat?
Christy Lee
Maybe music dirtier.
Tom Griswold
Oh, dirty, clunky.
Josh Arnold
Okay, maybe a salt burn reference.
Chick McGee
Now, so. So these are Valentine's Day chocolates. Does it describe the chocolate itself?
Tom Griswold
I mean, yes, it's a truffle made with vegan dark chocolate in the shape of. In the shape of a heart. A blob is there with Shatavari, an alleged libido boosting herb.
Chick McGee
Is there a color?
Christy Lee
The word you're looking for is clot.
Josh Arnold
Right, right, right. Is it. I mean, is it, like, strawberry or raspberry or.
Tom Griswold
It's dark.
Chick McGee
Now, how would you. If you were. If you were a. Let me say, as a lady, I'd like. I'd like you to speak on behalf of all women out there.
Tom Griswold
Yes.
Chick McGee
If you were handed for Valentine's Day a box of let's have sex during your period chocolate, would you find it mildly amusing or offensive?
Tom Griswold
That would be very funny. But I think you could also get these for your guy.
Josh Arnold
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Tom Griswold
I think this is the. Hey, look, don't be embarrassed. Let's do this. It's okay. I think it's probably more for a man than for a woman.
Chick McGee
Christy's.
Josh Arnold
Is it true that sex can help alleviate menstrual discomfort?
Tom Griswold
Yes.
Josh Arnold
Oh, yeah. I'd heard that Ease cramps.
Chick McGee
Yes.
Josh Arnold
Interesting.
Chick McGee
Wow. Okay. It's out there.
Josh Arnold
I don't mind.
Tom Griswold
I don't mind some. It's so grossed out by this.
Josh Arnold
They shouldn't call it let's have sex on my period. They should just call it, you don't have to wear a condom this time. Right.
Tom Griswold
Well, that's not necessary. That is not necessarily true.
Josh Arnold
Well, she's not gonna get pregnant.
Tom Griswold
Well, that's not necessarily true.
Christy Lee
You know your semen, A woman can.
Josh Arnold
Ovulate and have her menstrual cycle at the same time. Yeah, well, she's afraid or only a monster.
Christy Lee
Well, I believe the semen can hide up in there.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Tom Griswold
And then the as the eggs for.
Christy Lee
Like half an hour.
Josh Arnold
Trust me, I know this.
Chick McGee
Okay, now is. Is you. You would find this amusing?
Tom Griswold
Yes.
Chick McGee
Okay.
Josh Arnold
It seems crass, doesn't it?
Chick McGee
Yeah, I. I just can't imagine. You know, they say chivalry's dead, but here's my pack of let's have period sex chocolates for you.
Josh Arnold
You know, in a way though, we've evolved to such where that is rather chivalrous to go. You know what, baby? You're beautiful every day. No matter what's going on with you and your body, I want you.
Chick McGee
Whatever psychotic reactions occurring in your head that you're spewing forth against every word that comes out of your face. Oh.
Josh Arnold
Oh, Tom, I get enough. This product may not be for you.
Christy Lee
I love everything happening over here was psychotic. What coming out of your face? Man. Oh, man, that's crazy.
Chick McGee
It's. It's crazy. I just can't.
Tom Griswold
I mean, I really think it's more for the girl to give the guy than the guy to give the girl.
Josh Arnold
But what was once considered impolite in society to talk about and normalizing a.
Tom Griswold
Woman'S cycle, it's not a big deal.
Christy Lee
Yes, a return to normalcy.
Chick McGee
You mean normality, you illiterate moron. The point is, it just seems to me to be, as you said, crass.
Josh Arnold
Some will consider it.
Chick McGee
Let me ask you this, Christy. Is my doll still a thing? Does my. Is the famous yeah for my doll trend, all that stuff? Midol's just for ladies though, right?
Tom Griswold
Well, it's basically just a different name on it.
Christy Lee
And there's something in there a little.
Tom Griswold
Extra, but I'm not sure what want to say. Caffeine.
Josh Arnold
But that's a coagulant.
Chick McGee
I just thought look for it in the plug shaped bottle.
Josh Arnold
Yeah, I thought they're little poems. Stupid though. Didn't you think the poem was stupid? What was that poem? Oh, the one that Christy read.
Chick McGee
You want me to read it?
Tom Griswold
I. I can read it.
Josh Arnold
I could do better than that.
Christy Lee
Oh, okay.
Josh Arnold
Why don't you give?
Chick McGee
Well, the original poem was written by the Kotex people.
Christy Lee
Let's do it.
Josh Arnold
Love on your period.
Christy Lee
Some wouldn't think of It.
Josh Arnold
Hey, I'll wait in the Red Sea.
Chick McGee
I just won't drink from it. Oh.
Josh Arnold
You know that. Did you like that? Is that better? I. I liked it. I don't know that it was better for selling chocolate.
Chick McGee
Was that on the door of a toilet somewhere? Should be. No.
Christy Lee
Came to crap and only farted.
Chick McGee
Yeah. God, that is sad. This whole thing is just crazy to me.
Tom Griswold
We know. We get that. But it's.
Chick McGee
Once again, this is from the Kotex, people.
Tom Griswold
Yes. Let's have period.
Chick McGee
Let's have period sex is the name of the product.
Josh Arnold
You're not a man unless you've had period sex. I'm gonna come out and say it.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Josh Arnold
True men will do it.
Christy Lee
Absolutely.
Chick McGee
No, I'm not disputing any of that. I'm just saying it's. It just seems like an odd gift for Valentine.
Josh Arnold
It is. It is odd.
Chick McGee
I mean, who's next? The Preparation H people?
Christy Lee
Well.
Tom Griswold
Well, that's totally different. It's.
Chick McGee
I think it's a similar private thing.
Christy Lee
And I don't think you can get away with just. This is your own.
Tom Griswold
Well, no, this wouldn't be.
Christy Lee
No. You need to grab something from Steven Singer, I would think. Certainly.
Chick McGee
You don't just want whatever.
Christy Lee
Period sex chocolates.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Josh Arnold
No. No. Get her a period bracelet or.
Chick McGee
Or the new she's xlx syrup for your.
Christy Lee
Or the solid gold tampon.
Chick McGee
I just.
Tom Griswold
We know. Everything about the body freaks you out. It's okay.
Chick McGee
I think this is just weird to bring. To bring Kotex into the Valentine's Day gift realm.
Christy Lee
In your home, do you have a water closet in the bathroom? And you know what I mean by water closet? It's a toilet.
Chick McGee
Of course I have a toilet. In the bath you have a toilet.
Christy Lee
And you have a. Is it in a little compartment in the bathroom? A closing door? Yes. Are you ever in there and a significant other is at the sink doing.
Chick McGee
Something very rarely I would go to.
Christy Lee
So it has happened, though.
Chick McGee
No, but I'd go. Different part of the house.
Christy Lee
Is that right?
Chick McGee
Yes. If there was a major transaction. I'm a gentleman. I'll go to the parlor. Bathroom in the hallway.
Tom Griswold
Oh, so all your guests can smell you.
Josh Arnold
UPS driver gets a whiff magazine.
Christy Lee
You come out.
Tom Griswold
Do not go in there.
Christy Lee
Is that right?
Josh Arnold
You know who this is also perfect for that we. Is so obvious that I don't know how we women who are on. Are having their period on Valentine's Day.
Tom Griswold
I almost. I thought.
Josh Arnold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
I mean, this is.
Tom Griswold
I thought, boy, if your cycle cycles up with this. This is perfect.
Josh Arnold
Right?
Chick McGee
Well, how do you know that's going to come off?
Josh Arnold
Women have a pretty good idea.
Chick McGee
But you have to buy this thing online. Do they? Is it same day shipping?
Josh Arnold
I see what you're saying. It must happen with.
Chick McGee
Honey, I just got the word.
Christy Lee
Yeah, I just got the word.
Chick McGee
Judging by her response to what I just said, I think it's common. You better send me the.
Tom Griswold
A lot of people have their calendars on their phone.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Josh Arnold
It's a big thing.
Tom Griswold
And they will share it with their guys.
Josh Arnold
There's an app.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, absolutely.
Christy Lee
And you. And you get a copy of it being the. Oh, really?
Chick McGee
So I can look at my phone today? Oh, look, I'm having lunch with my attorney and then. Oh, look what's happening for Friday.
Christy Lee
I guess I better get that hotel room. I won't go home. See?
Chick McGee
I better get the bleach and some towels. Bleach?
Christy Lee
What's going on? Oh, she had her periods. So you're gonna kill her. Okay.
Josh Arnold
Christy, I just want you to know.
Tom Griswold
Yes, sir.
Josh Arnold
If ever again we're talking about menstruation or that time that I. If you ever have any questions about it, I will gladly inform you about what it means for a woman to have her period.
Chick McGee
This mansplaining.
Tom Griswold
No, no, I consider I don't have a period.
Josh Arnold
A gift from me.
Tom Griswold
Way past that, thank God.
Christy Lee
Here's something for you, Tom. Time of the month on the rag, of course.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Christy Lee
With that.
Tom Griswold
Banners are in down.
Christy Lee
There are communists in the fun house.
Chick McGee
You heard of that?
Josh Arnold
That's silly and funny.
Christy Lee
The English have landed.
Josh Arnold
Oh, yeah.
Christy Lee
Monthly visitor.
Josh Arnold
Clueless taught us. Riding the crimson wave.
Christy Lee
Crimson wave is on here.
Chick McGee
Yeah. Call me Moses. I'm about to part the Red Sea.
Josh Arnold
Oh, sure. And flow is in town. Yeah.
Christy Lee
Red Badge of Courage. Really?
Chick McGee
A little Stephen Crane.
Christy Lee
That's right. Mad cow disease.
Chick McGee
Oh, that's.
Josh Arnold
I can't imagine.
Christy Lee
And just. Finally, just give you some starters. Checking into the Red Roof.
Chick McGee
And we're coming right back with some out of this world stuff, including cosmonauts, rock and a floating sauna. It's coming up next on the Best of the Bob and Tom Show.
Christy Lee
Bob and Tom.
Chick McGee
This is the Bob and Tom Show. Welcome back. This is Christopher playing some good stuff. The Best of the Bob and Tom Show. How about a cosmonaut? How about some rockets and maybe a floating sauna?
Christy Lee
And that brings us to stupid world record.
Tom Griswold
This isn't a stupid world record. This is cool.
Christy Lee
A Russian cosmonaut has set the new record for the most time spent in space. What's wrong with this story?
Tom Griswold
It's a Russian cosmonaut.
Christy Lee
It's a Russian cop. This doesn't count in America.
Josh Arnold
Please take me home.
Christy Lee
I am sick of spare.
Josh Arnold
I hate sp.
Chick McGee
My back hurt.
Christy Lee
Russia. My back is shredded. Russia's Space Agency Rosco. Roscosmos. Is that right? Ros. Cosmos.
Josh Arnold
You said the rights. Are you dead?
Chick McGee
I was on cover of Ross Cosmopolitan.
Josh Arnold
You were?
Chick McGee
Yes.
Christy Lee
Oleg Kononenko has now spent more than 878 days and 12 hours in space. You can't tell me how many. 878 days, 12 hours. You can't tell me this has changed his entire entire physiology. He's not going to be able to walk.
Chick McGee
How many trips to the space station?
Christy Lee
59 year old surpasses where? Russia. State news. I fly into space to do what I love. Not to set records. I've dreamt of and aspired to become a cosmonaut since I was a child. He's made five journeys to the International Space Station.
Josh Arnold
My bones are pudding now.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
Yes. You ever see my wife's picture? You'd go to space too?
Christy Lee
Yes.
Josh Arnold
Keep me up here.
Christy Lee
If she still lives.
Chick McGee
Shoot.
Christy Lee
Oh, real. A real bowser.
Chick McGee
Oh, face look like gorilla's ass.
Christy Lee
Good Lord.
Josh Arnold
Feel bad.
Christy Lee
Hope she's waiting in line for toilet paper is what. I hope they still have that waiting in line for stuff over there.
Josh Arnold
We have terrible toilet paper on iss.
Chick McGee
Use it to sand my new boat.
Josh Arnold
My ass is registered than Gorbachev's head.
Chick McGee
When I say I need some space. I need to go to outer space. Did I mention my wife Ugly take my wife, please.
Christy Lee
I told her to go somewhere she'd never been before. How about the kitchen?
Josh Arnold
My wife said she wanted to be seen in something long and flowing. I threw her in river.
Chick McGee
That actually leads to a story in the News.
Josh Arnold
I have 15 more minutes of comedy.
Tom Griswold
Police in Washington state say a cold war era rocket was discovered in the garage of a deceased resident. Bellevue police said an Air Force museum in Dayton, Ohio.
Christy Lee
The Air Force Museum.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, right back provided. Reported an offer to donate a military grade rocket which a neighbor said had been purchased at an estate sale. Officers responded to the home where bomb squad members found a Douglas Air 2.
Josh Arnold
Genie whose estate sale Oliver North.
Tom Griswold
No joke. An unguided heir to air rocket designed to carry a one and a half. Some kind of nuclear warhead.
Chick McGee
Kiloton kill a ton.
Tom Griswold
Yeah. Police said there was no warhead attached, thankfully.
Christy Lee
Yeah, it's badass.
Tom Griswold
And there was no rocket fuel. Essentially meaning the item was an artifact with no explosive hazard. They added because the item was inert and the military did not request it back, police left the item with the neighbor to be restored for display in a museum.
Josh Arnold
Wow.
Chick McGee
Oh. Why would a guy want that in his garage?
Josh Arnold
Pretty badass. Hey, you want to see my rocket?
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
Hey, I took the nuclear warhead. It's in the dining room.
Tom Griswold
It beats you Want to come see my painting? Yeah, man, I'd do that. You would go see a rocket, wouldn't you?
Josh Arnold
I'd be real nervous if you'd fall for that.
Tom Griswold
I would. I'd like to see a rocket. Sure.
Christy Lee
You want to go? You want to come see my rocket?
Josh Arnold
I fell for worse.
Christy Lee
Or come see my.
Tom Griswold
Me too.
Chick McGee
We also have an interesting story in the world of rescues. I find this absolutely fascinating.
Tom Griswold
Guests aboard a floating sauna and a Norwegian fjord helped rescue two people whose car plunged into the water. The Norwegian VG newspaper.
Christy Lee
Hey, Lu, how you do? I hope your day is going there.
Tom Griswold
Reported a driver accidentally drove off a dock and Oslo after hitting the accelerator pad when they thought the vehicle was in park.
Josh Arnold
Oh.
Tom Griswold
The car's two occupants escaped the sinking vehicle and were on the roof of the car as a sauna raft headed toward them. First of all, would you get I sauna raft? That sounds like a fun time.
Josh Arnold
That's not interesting.
Chick McGee
It kind of reminds me of those party bar.
Christy Lee
Yeah, exactly.
Chick McGee
But it looks like those. Those bicycles that people have.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
They're in this big floating sauna drifting down the river.
Tom Griswold
Skipper Nikolai. No Doordahl. Threw the sauna into full throttle and managed to reach them just as the car went under, he said. With good help from two of the guests who got them up. Warmed him up in the sauna. Dressed only in towels, by the way.
Christy Lee
Oh, yeah. Time for the three way. Oh.
Josh Arnold
Wow. All right.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Josh Arnold
So they're fine.
Chick McGee
Did you see the picture?
Tom Griswold
Fine. I did not.
Christy Lee
Oh, yeah.
Chick McGee
It's a truck. Pickup truck.
Josh Arnold
It is. What kind?
Chick McGee
It's a. It's a fjord. F150.
Christy Lee
That's one of my favorite words. Fjord.
Chick McGee
Fjord.
Tom Griswold
Fun to say, isn't it? Fjord. You have a song. Pat.
Christy Lee
Pat.
Chick McGee
It sounds like I once had a sauna.
Josh Arnold
It's a dry heat.
Chick McGee
Better than steam.
Josh Arnold
Naked, sitting on a raft.
Chick McGee
Welcome aboard Norwegian Fjord.
Josh Arnold
And out of nowhere, a car flew off of the street.
Chick McGee
It plunged in the water.
Josh Arnold
Was it a ford in the fjord?
Christy Lee
So deep.
Josh Arnold
I threw on a towel, put down.
Chick McGee
My wine, jumped in the brine, saved.
Josh Arnold
A frozen couple from drowning, stiff as A board.
Chick McGee
Nor would Norwegian Fjord. It looks like fun. Flown down the river in a sauna. I wonder if you. Are you supposed to, like, jump out of the sauna into the river and then go back?
Christy Lee
Probably. You're supposed to do a cold plunge.
Josh Arnold
Or shower after a sauna. That's exhilarating.
Christy Lee
Weren't we talking about last week? Remember those, for lack of a better term, boxes that had a circle cut in the top of them? Those are huge. Now, you could stick your head out.
Tom Griswold
Oh, my gosh.
Christy Lee
There's saunas that you can climb right in. Right.
Chick McGee
In all the three. In the Three Stooges movies.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Chick McGee
And then you'd always. It was always the same thing. There'd be a big fat guy in this thing, and then the Stooges would run by, and one of them would take a broom handle, stick it in there. The guy gets stuck there. You see steam coming out of his ears. Then they'd run by 10 minutes later, and this little skinny guy would come out.
Josh Arnold
Very funny. Those are back. Huh?
Christy Lee
Those are back. They're huge right now. The. The saunas and the steam rooms and all that.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
So. But I mean, is it. Is it with your head just sticking out?
Josh Arnold
Yeah. If you want to do one at.
Christy Lee
Home and not spend thousands of dollars.
Tom Griswold
You can get those for a couple of hundred.
Chick McGee
Can you get out?
Tom Griswold
Yeah, you.
Christy Lee
It zips up. It's like a collapsible.
Josh Arnold
I see.
Christy Lee
Type situation.
Chick McGee
They're not the big steel, you know, shut. Like a.
Christy Lee
No, no.
Josh Arnold
Dryer. Yeah.
Chick McGee
And then you're stuck in there.
Christy Lee
Well, this one is a thermal wood mini cube sauna that holds two people. Well, there's that. That's a bigger. That's a big.
Tom Griswold
That's a nice. And look up the fabric one.
Christy Lee
What's that gonna set you back, five grand? Yeah.
Josh Arnold
Let's get one of those.
Chick McGee
We should.
Christy Lee
Me and you. So we could hang out in it.
Josh Arnold
And we'll charge Everybody else like 50 bucks.
Christy Lee
That's right.
Chick McGee
We go to the gym for just a couple hundred bucks a month, baby.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
A couple hundred. What you going to. Yeah, I take all my ladies.
Christy Lee
I'm sorry.
Tom Griswold
What is this?
Josh Arnold
What is a.
Tom Griswold
A gym?
Josh Arnold
Yeah, the saunas at the gym.
Chick McGee
Gym.
Tom Griswold
You want to get in there with a bunch of strangers?
Josh Arnold
That's what happens every day for me.
Christy Lee
I.
Josh Arnold
That's what I do. Nice, hot, steamy cycle Jack, do you put the earbuds in?
Chick McGee
You don't talk to anybody. Is it unisex?
Christy Lee
It is. I don't like that. I Wanted to go back to being.
Chick McGee
Do you have a. You wear a bathing suit or just have a towel on?
Josh Arnold
No, it's.
Chick McGee
It's a bathing suit.
Josh Arnold
It's right by the pool. Yeah, yeah.
Chick McGee
You've been there, you see it?
Christy Lee
Yeah, but they can reach whoever sprawl and with you reach over and.
Josh Arnold
Oh, yeah, it's foggy in there.
Tom Griswold
Usually keep your hands.
Chick McGee
You talk to people in there?
Christy Lee
I don't finger diddle, you know.
Chick McGee
Do you wear. Do you wear headphones?
Josh Arnold
I wear the earbuds, yeah. Oh, no.
Chick McGee
A lot of people talking in there.
Christy Lee
You could talk to people, Tom.
Tom Griswold
You'd like it.
Josh Arnold
You can talk to people.
Christy Lee
So are you married?
Tom Griswold
Why? No, it's supposed to be a quiet, relaxing. There's a.
Christy Lee
There's a guy at my gym that sets his phone up on the outside of the sauna and has his earbuds.
Josh Arnold
In because his phone will get too.
Tom Griswold
Hot and it'll shut off and then.
Christy Lee
He keeps it, just stares at it.
Chick McGee
Oh, you should have someone steal it.
Josh Arnold
Would it be funny if I said in there in like a full suit and whenever. Whenever anybody looked at me, I just said, I don't have an iron.
Pat Godwin
Yes.
Josh Arnold
You think I'd get a laugh? That's the Sinatra method, by the way.
Christy Lee
This is the sauna in a box and it's a zip up cloth. It's 350. Look at that. Yeah, that's the thing right there, Tom.
Chick McGee
Okay, very good. All right. So, Pat, I want. I want to explore this a little bit more. You don't talk to anybody in the sauna.
Josh Arnold
I.
Chick McGee
You don't? No, I try to last 15 minutes in there. And that's a good day.
Josh Arnold
It's very.
Chick McGee
You scratch at all?
Christy Lee
No, just scratch myself.
Josh Arnold
Is it one of those that has the rocks and the ladle? Yeah, on either side. Rock. No. Ladle. You don't do any of that. Oh, okay. Just the hot rocks?
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Christy Lee
The kind that Steve Lawrence had in Blues Brothers.
Josh Arnold
Yes.
Tom Griswold
Is it a dry sauna or steam?
Chick McGee
It's a dry sauna.
Josh Arnold
And they have the steam too.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Josh Arnold
Do you have a sauna hat?
Christy Lee
I have a sauna.
Josh Arnold
A sauna hat?
Christy Lee
Yeah, it's a felt hat to help keep. Keep the heat, make you sweat faster.
Tom Griswold
It's ridiculous.
Josh Arnold
Yeah, but it's. It's beneficial. All right.
Christy Lee
It's a felt hat.
Chick McGee
Can you wear that? Do you have it in your car right now?
Christy Lee
No, I don't have it. My car.
Tom Griswold
It's in my gym bag.
Chick McGee
Okay. Okay, thank you very much.
Christy Lee
You feel Dismissed. Yeah, I know.
Tom Griswold
Veterinarians in Maryland say they removed a gear shift knob from a snake stomach. The Second Chance Wildlife center in Gates said it was apparent that the rat snake had ingested a foreign object when it was brought in. Staff initially thought it might be a golf ball, which snakes often mistake for fresh chicken eggs. However, when the reptile underwent surgery to remove the object, the vet discovered a gear shift knob in its stomach. It was successful.
Josh Arnold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
Cobra.
Tom Griswold
Snake is now recovering at the wildlife center. Will be returned to the west wild in the spring.
Josh Arnold
Ah.
Chick McGee
Veteran Aaron called that a knob job, by the way.
Christy Lee
How about this? This is a Disney. Disney movie waiting to happen. Call it snakes. And there's a near sighted snake who thinks these are chicken eggs and they're not. They're all golf balls. And he tries and tries and tries to get a chicken egg and he. He doesn't. And then at the end finally gets a chicken egg.
Josh Arnold
All right, sir, for we have other pictures to hear.
Chick McGee
Josh, thank you for your pitch through.
Christy Lee
The love of a good female snake.
Josh Arnold
No, it sounds real cute.
Chick McGee
So this snake ate a. The shifter knob from. Now, Josh, your snake was an automatic, right?
Josh Arnold
That's exactly okay. I didn't know how to own a.
Chick McGee
Drive a manual.
Josh Arnold
Manual.
Chick McGee
Okay.
Christy Lee
How did I know you were a snake owner before you told us? I could just tell.
Josh Arnold
Yeah, yeah. I've got some dirt bag in me.
Christy Lee
Don't snake owning looking guy.
Tom Griswold
Police in India have cleared a suspected Chinese spy pigeon after it spent eight months in a so called bird lockup.
Christy Lee
Wait a minute. A pigeon, an actual pigeon, is a spy for the Chinese?
Tom Griswold
That's what they're saying. According to the press trust of India, the pigeons ordeal began in May when it was captured near a port in Mumbai with two rings tied to its legs, carrying words that look like Chinese. Police suspected it was involved in espionage and took it in.
Christy Lee
What? Wow.
Tom Griswold
The pigeon was eventually found.
Chick McGee
The Chinese, they use balloons, not pigeons. What would the pigeon. Why would they have to secret away something on a pigeon?
Josh Arnold
Stuff like this happens. Yeah.
Chick McGee
I mean, during World War II, maybe.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Chick McGee
I mean, don't they.
Christy Lee
That's true.
Tom Griswold
They used them, right?
Christy Lee
Carrier pigeons.
Josh Arnold
Well, sure. Carrier pigeons were.
Christy Lee
Yeah, they carried things.
Josh Arnold
Did you know the CIA? This is absolutely true. The CIA spent $20 million training a cat to be a spy. And they did all these studies on cats and they finally picked this cat out and they did a surgery where they put like this antenna in the spine of the cat and a listening device in its ear surgically so that it could Go into this room and listen in and then take back the recordings. And so the day they were going to test this cat, this van pulls up. They have two guys sitting on a bench. And the cat's supposed to go up, listen to the guys and record them and then go back to the van. Well, they pull up, they open the door of the van, cat runs out $20 million immediately hit by a car.
Tom Griswold
That's true story.
Josh Arnold
Yes, true story.
Christy Lee
Really?
Josh Arnold
Yes. Our CIA spent 20 million training a spy cat.
Tom Griswold
No, that's our tax dollars.
Chick McGee
Why would the cat walk up to.
Josh Arnold
The bench they had trained it through? They trained it to go up to certain areas and certain people. People and stuff. But they didn't park on the right side of the street.
Chick McGee
Couldn't they flash your part?
Josh Arnold
Exactly. They. They didn't think to drop it off on the side of the street the bench was on.
Tom Griswold
This pigeon was eventually found to be an open water racing bird from Taiwan that escaped and made its way to India. It has now since been released back into the wild.
Josh Arnold
I doubt it. Yeah. Executed.
Tom Griswold
This is the thing.
Chick McGee
The chick. To go with your idea. This is. This is the first Pixar film featuring waterboarding and torture.
Christy Lee
All right. That's not my Disney movie about the snakes. Finding chicken eggs instead of golf balls. What? No.
Tom Griswold
A Georgia family was driven out of their home by a colony of bats. Recently. Monica and Isaiah Grant told the Savannah Morning News that they spotted the first bat on the evening of January 18th.
Josh Arnold
We saw the first bat.
Christy Lee
There's a murder in Savannah.
Tom Griswold
And like everyone used a blank to scoot the bat outside.
Christy Lee
A broom.
Josh Arnold
I'm going to say a fine broom of some sort.
Tom Griswold
How about a tennis racket?
Christy Lee
Well, we don't play tennis.
Tom Griswold
Pickleball.
Christy Lee
It's too hot.
Tom Griswold
Within a few days, they encountered several more bats, including one instance when a friend came running out of the bathroom with her pants down and screaming.
Josh Arnold
Man.
Tom Griswold
As the situation developed into a full fledged infestation.
Christy Lee
And her full bush was on display.
Josh Arnold
Right there for everyone.
Christy Lee
Good Lord. I screamed.
Tom Griswold
The couple said away. Two small children moved to a hotel and began rabies treatment.
Josh Arnold
Your pubic shrub is visible.
Christy Lee
Then I said, you bear it. We'll all share it.
Josh Arnold
A witticism that did not go unnoticed.
Christy Lee
Thank you.
Tom Griswold
They have also started a GoFundMe campaign to raise enough money to cover the treatments as well as hotel bills.
Chick McGee
They have rabies shots.
Tom Griswold
Yes. A pest control.
Christy Lee
A filthy woman. You'd have to have rabies shots to be exposed to that.
Tom Griswold
Told them that in the 43 years they'd been in business, they'd never seen that many bats living in a space. Wow.
Chick McGee
I wonder what kind of superpowers the kids are going to get.
Christy Lee
Yeah, that's awful.
Chick McGee
Wow.
Tom Griswold
Yes.
Chick McGee
I've had bats in a place before.
Tom Griswold
Oh, I've had bats in my house.
Christy Lee
Getting about out of the garage. You take a flashlight?
Tom Griswold
No, that was the hummingbird.
Christy Lee
Hummingbird, Remember?
Josh Arnold
Oh, yes. Those terrifying, terrifying hummingbirds.
Christy Lee
You got to get them out of here.
Chick McGee
We'll talk about the Rock and Roll hall of Fame and the Golden Bachelorette. Plus more. It's coming up next here on the Bob and Tom show. This is the Bob and Tom Show.
Christy Lee
Welcome back.
Chick McGee
This is Christopher in the Bob and Tom Studios. We're going to talk about the Rock and Roll hall of Fame in this segment. Plus the Golden Bachelorette and some kids art.
Tom Griswold
Before the break, we were talking about rock and roll. And the Rock and Roll hall has announced their 2024 possible inductees.
Josh Arnold
Well, this should infuriate most of us, right? Doesn't it usually?
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Christy Lee
Having a good day. Here we go.
Tom Griswold
Those nominated this year include Ozzy Osbourne, up for his second shot at a Rock hall induction because of course he's in his. He's in with Black sabbath, sure. But 2006.
Josh Arnold
I like his solo stuff too. Put him in.
Tom Griswold
Also up, Foreigner, our good friend Peter Frampton.
Josh Arnold
Get in.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Tom Griswold
Come on, Peter. Jane Addiction, Eric B. And Rakim, A Tribe Called Quest, the Dave Matthews Band, Lenny Kravitz, Cher, Mariah Carey, Sinead O'Connor, Oasis, Mary J. Blige, Cool in the Gang and Sade.
Josh Arnold
I heard a couple rock bands in there.
Tom Griswold
The inductees will be announced in late April. The date of the Rock and Roll hall of Fame induction has not yet been announced.
Chick McGee
Still not in there.
Christy Lee
What?
Chick McGee
The guest who.
Josh Arnold
Oh my gosh, that.
Christy Lee
That caused the most talk online when this came out. Was the guest.
Chick McGee
Really? And also I don't think Bad company or free with, you know, Paul Kof, genius guitar player. They should certainly be in. All right now.
Christy Lee
I thought Paul Rogers was in for something.
Chick McGee
Paul Kossoff, the guitar player. I don't think there Grand Funk's not.
Christy Lee
In the singer though for Right? Yeah. I don't know.
Chick McGee
Humble pie.
Josh Arnold
Well, I mean I would have thought Frampton would have been first five years.
Chick McGee
Yeah, no kidding. All right, well, Yan Winner was the guy responsible for all he's been.
Josh Arnold
Was he the Rolling Stone dude?
Chick McGee
Yeah, he's gone now. He stepped.
Tom Griswold
So you can vote on the Rock and Roll hall of fame site if you like. You get to vote for seven people or bands and one time a day. And you can log in to do that on the website once again. Vote.rockhaul.com so I don't think Boston in there. What?
Josh Arnold
Man, that's ridiculous.
Chick McGee
Yeah. Some of the largest selling albums of all time.
Josh Arnold
Considering their first album was essentially a greatest hits.
Chick McGee
But then you look at other people in there I've never heard of.
Josh Arnold
Huh.
Chick McGee
They need to change the name. Rock and roll and pop music or.
Tom Griswold
Just music hall of fame music.
Chick McGee
Yeah. Because it's.
Josh Arnold
Sometimes they remind me of bands though that I need to. I should be familiar with. Like I. I couldn't tell you a Tribe Called Quest song. And I should know. They seem cool.
Tom Griswold
They do seem.
Christy Lee
Can I kick it or something?
Josh Arnold
I mean I probably heard them, I just didn't know them.
Chick McGee
And I can't get past the name because there used to be a douche called Quest. I always think of a douche called Quest.
Tom Griswold
Back in the 50s we had this discussion before because I did not believe him and I looked it up. Sadly, he was correct. Antique douche hasn't been around for years.
Chick McGee
They called my aunt.
Josh Arnold
Yeah.
Tom Griswold
A douche.
Josh Arnold
I remember my grandpa being real mad about that Quest stuff. He yelled at my grandma after brushing his teeth. No, I said give me the crest.
Chick McGee
The crest tastes like vinegar.
Christy Lee
How does one study antique douche? I don't know.
Tom Griswold
That's a great question.
Chick McGee
That'd be a chair at some university.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Tom Griswold
Here's something that'll make you mad. After the success of the Golden Bat Bachelor, ABC has announced the Golden Bachelorette is on its way this fall.
Chick McGee
I just love men.
Josh Arnold
It's raining men. I would watch that in a second.
Christy Lee
You want some of this?
Tom Griswold
Details have not been announced but it will be some lucky lady over.
Christy Lee
Stephanie. Stephanie.
Tom Griswold
Hold it.
Christy Lee
I don't care.
Chick McGee
So it'll be one woman and then a bunch of guys.
Tom Griswold
Yes.
Christy Lee
Fill it up.
Josh Arnold
I made you a pineapple upside down cake. You can eat that first.
Chick McGee
Jerry mounted me. He didn't even need a ramp. Brought to you by Viagra.
Tom Griswold
Many think it will be the lady who was the runner up on the Bachelor. She's from Minneapolis. Beautiful fitness model.
Josh Arnold
Come on.
Chick McGee
I lost.
Christy Lee
I'm beautiful.
Chick McGee
What are the. What's the age range of the fellas?
Tom Griswold
I believe it's 55 and older.
Christy Lee
19 to 22.
Josh Arnold
It ain't gonna gum itself.
Tom Griswold
It's not the Golden Cougar. That would be a whole different show.
Josh Arnold
Oh, I'd watch that.
Tom Griswold
The Golden Cougar.
Chick McGee
Give me a lunch.
Josh Arnold
You look like a tasty treat.
Chick McGee
I got some of that panda porn for you. Yeah, it's called the behind the behind the Bamboo Door. Turns me on.
Christy Lee
You know, a lot of people, they don't know how to take me, so I rub people the wrong way.
Josh Arnold
I've been told don't let my personality know. They used to say I look like a young Jessica Tandy.
Christy Lee
Or Carol Okana.
Tom Griswold
60 to 75 years is the bachelor span. That's the age range.
Josh Arnold
One day I want to sleep with someone who's not a white man.
Chick McGee
I'm just saying.
Josh Arnold
20, 24. You can do that now, you know. Yes, we. My God, man.
Chick McGee
Maybe the casting should have. The casting should be very, very diverse. I'm sorry, does not speak English, but why don't you just. Guys go at it? Check that out.
Christy Lee
Oh, you can. You can do that.
Chick McGee
It's okay.
Christy Lee
You can do.
Tom Griswold
Changing the subject.
Christy Lee
I want variety.
Chick McGee
You brought it up.
Tom Griswold
Because I knew this would ensue.
Chick McGee
All right, we're gonna line up for those of you who don't have your prostates over that way.
Josh Arnold
We're all going over here now.
Tom Griswold
I wonder if they offer them Viagra or anything.
Chick McGee
They better off.
Josh Arnold
Viagra doesn't advertise for that. It what are they doing, right?
Tom Griswold
Or any of the ed Drugs. Yeah, whatever that.
Christy Lee
Sure.
Chick McGee
I'm not sure they even need to advertise anymore.
Josh Arnold
Yeah, it does got to sell itself, I suppose.
Chick McGee
But you. So I mean, the question is, are they giving them out like s breath mix on the set for you, Lloyd. See, Alice, she's going out with Dave.
Pat Godwin
Dave.
Christy Lee
Dave.
Pat Godwin
He's not a white. Not a white name.
Josh Arnold
We'll be back with more.
Christy Lee
The Bachelorette has been cancelled.
Chick McGee
That's funny.
Josh Arnold
Can we vet these people better, please?
Christy Lee
She's.
Chick McGee
She's a racist of a certain age. What else is going on over there?
Tom Griswold
Teacher is accused of selling his students artwork online.
Christy Lee
Oh, yeah.
Tom Griswold
Drawings made by Mario Peron's students at Westwood Junior High School. Appearance online with one 12 year old's artwork listed for $112 on at least four different websites.
Christy Lee
Oh my gosh.
Tom Griswold
Her drawings and those of other fellow classmates appear on multiple items including $40 T shirts, coffee mugs for 30, and even a $26 iPhone case.
Josh Arnold
Ah, I see.
Tom Griswold
Huh? Students told their parents after a classmate discovered their teacher's website. The school board president told CTV News.
Christy Lee
News, we can't tell you what the C stands for.
Tom Griswold
Okay.
Christy Lee
Enjoy the show though.
Tom Griswold
That it's taking these allegations very seriously and an investigation is underway. Or is he an entrepreneur and he's just trying to make a little extra money? Teachers don't get paid a lot.
Chick McGee
Yeah, well, yeah, but I'm a big fan of student art.
Christy Lee
Actually, he's giving the kids a cut. I guess it's okay. And they know about it, right?
Tom Griswold
No, they don't know about it. That's the thing. Maybe if he cuts, gives him a cut.
Josh Arnold
We don't know. I mean, I've been saving up for a pizza party for those kids.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
The tip off was each work of art came with a refrigerator and then a magnet. Post it. I got a problem with it. My refrigerator doesn't have magnet capability.
Tom Griswold
It does.
Josh Arnold
Oh, no.
Tom Griswold
Well, you're too fancy.
Chick McGee
I don't know.
Christy Lee
I mean, I told you this. I took me a while to find a. I. I specifically wanted one. I put magnets on the front of it. It took me a little bit to find one.
Josh Arnold
I must have lucked out.
Tom Griswold
Me too.
Josh Arnold
I had magnets all over mine.
Chick McGee
And my niece.
Josh Arnold
And nieces. And art and stuff like that. Yeah. Boy, she charged me a lot for her. One of her last pieces.
Chick McGee
How much?
Josh Arnold
I offered her. She said she would sell it to me for 10.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Josh Arnold
I said I'd give her five, and she said, how about seven?
Christy Lee
This is grand, right?
Josh Arnold
Sorry. Just dollars.
Chick McGee
What age are we dealing with?
Josh Arnold
Boy. 11, now 12.
Chick McGee
Very entrepreneurial.
Josh Arnold
Yeah. And so. And it was an owl. A very, very colorful. Very well done. I'd say maybe like a 10 by 18, something like that.
Tom Griswold
Okay.
Josh Arnold
Pretty big.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Josh Arnold
And I gave her a 10, and she gave me back three to. Oh, no, she. Yeah. Yeah. And I. No, something else went wrong.
Tom Griswold
I was gonna say. Well, the story.
Josh Arnold
What really happened is. Is way better than the story that I'm telling.
Christy Lee
Okay.
Josh Arnold
Just. Just know.
Christy Lee
All right.
Josh Arnold
Please just know that in real life, I experienced something real funny and enjoyable.
Chick McGee
Was there something about the art itself that was interesting?
Tom Griswold
Swindled you is what you're trying to say?
Josh Arnold
Yes.
Christy Lee
Did she take the whole 10 bucks.
Josh Arnold
Or something along those lines? I mean, but you guys should have been there.
Christy Lee
Nobody got hurt.
Josh Arnold
If you had been there.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Josh Arnold
You would have known what happened.
Christy Lee
Okay.
Chick McGee
Oh, well.
Tom Griswold
And we'd be chuckling.
Josh Arnold
Oh, yeah. You guys would have really liked it if I had all the details.
Christy Lee
We would have been telling the story somewhere else.
Josh Arnold
I'm sure it would have been repeated.
Chick McGee
Yeah. We could walk to the cooler and go tell it to somebody. Sounds really, really good. Who would be Buying other people other. I mean, it could be a thing.
Tom Griswold
I don't know.
Chick McGee
Do you want to. I don't know.
Christy Lee
Lonely bastard.
Josh Arnold
This makes more sense. You go to an Etsy type site and you can buy a T shirt with this. I would buy a shirt that just had a silly looking gorilla or whatever drawn. And it looked like it was drawn by a kid.
Tom Griswold
Because there are sites where you can get your own kids.
Josh Arnold
Exactly. Yeah. It just looks like a fun design.
Chick McGee
Is this some person who's trying to, you know, date someone thinking and say, I've got some kids even though they don't have them?
Josh Arnold
No, it doesn't sound like that.
Tom Griswold
Sounds like he's just trying to make some extra money.
Chick McGee
You know, I understand why the teacher's doing. I'm saying, who's. Who's the purchase? Who's gonna buy other kids artwork?
Josh Arnold
Well, I did. I did try to explain it in that it's just a silly design that people might like.
Chick McGee
Okay, all right.
Josh Arnold
Because it's on T shirts and bags and coffee mugs.
Tom Griswold
We don't know how it was presented. Maybe it's presented that they're buying artwork to help the kids. Kids.
Josh Arnold
My niece once drew this one painting.
Christy Lee
Oh, oh, here's another story.
Josh Arnold
Is it was.
Chick McGee
Is there math?
Josh Arnold
Oh, what the hell was it? But, man, I'm telling you. What if you saw it, you guys probably would have liked. Oh, that sounds like it could be fun. Yeah, sounds like you would have really.
Chick McGee
Call it Uncle Josh's Peach.
Josh Arnold
All I know is you guys would have reacted somehow.
Chick McGee
He posed for half an hour. Uncle Josh.
Josh Arnold
Come on, kids.
Christy Lee
This is the Bob and Tom show.
Tom Griswold
Named one of the best personal finance podcasts. The Stagging Benjamin show with Joe and.
Christy Lee
His friends makes financial literacy fun.
Chick McGee
Draymond Green has a podcast. He was asking Mark Cuban why, At the beginning of 2024, Cuban sold a.
Tom Griswold
Huge part of his company.
Christy Lee
He's like, did you see how much money I got?
Chick McGee
I'm sure there's a more graceful answer than that, but, dude, I bought it for 200 million and sold it for 6 billion. Like, what the heck?
Josh Arnold
I don't think it was that much more graceful than that.
Tom Griswold
Find out more by searching the Stacking Benjamins podcast wherever you listen.
The BOB & TOM Show - December 24, 2024: Detailed Summary
Introduction and Initial Banter (00:00 - 04:02)
The episode begins with the hosts, Tom Griswold and Chick McGee, engaging in their signature comedic exchanges. Chick McGee humorously impersonates a fellow driver, Dick Mango, describing a sluggish driver ahead with exaggerated antics:
Christy Lee joins the banter, adding playful remarks about the "snail man" and other quirky scenarios, setting a lighthearted tone for the show.
Guest Segment: Comedian Ryan Singer (04:02 - 12:00)
Introduction of Ryan Singer (04:02 - 05:07)
Discussion on Facial Hair and Pop Culture (04:07 - 10:57) The conversation shifts to facial hair trends, with Chick McGee explaining his "travel stash" inspired by D'Artagnan from "The Three Musketeers." Josh Arnold humorously misinterprets references to "D'Artagnan," leading to discussions about Viking shows and mythological elements.
Pencil Sharpener Museum Anecdote (10:00 - 12:00) Christy Lee shares a listener's story about discovering a pencil sharpener museum in Hocking Hills, Ohio:
Chick McGee and Josh Arnold joke about the practicality and size of such a museum, highlighting the absurdity and humor in everyday adventures.
Middle Segment: Funny Stories and Personal Updates (12:00 - 30:00)
Ryan Singer's Personal Life (12:30 - 19:00) Chick McGee inquires about Ryan Singer's personal life, leading to humorous revelations about being single and living out of a storage unit:
Ryan Singer briefly explains his nomadic lifestyle, maintaining the comedic atmosphere.
Christy Lee's Engagement Story (19:00 - 24:00) Christy Lee shares her engagement story with Tom Griswold:
The narrative includes playful interruptions from Chick McGee and Josh Arnold, culminating in humorous exchanges about past relationships and marriage prospects.
Obituary Segment: John B. Goodenough (30:00 - 40:00) Tom Griswold presents an obituary for John B. Goodenough, a Nobel Prize-winning inventor of the lithium-ion battery:
The hosts reflect on Goodenough's contributions, blending respect with their characteristic humor.
Guest Segment: Comedian Greg Hahn (40:00 - 60:00)
Introduction of Greg Hahn (31:27 - 38:42) Chick McGee introduces comedian Greg Hahn, leading to banter about Greg's appearance and comedic style:
Humorous Hair Discussions (32:33 - 40:00) The conversation revolves around Greg's distinctive hair, with playful teasing from the hosts:
Christy Lee and Josh Arnold joke about hairstyles, toupees, and the lengths comedians go to for a laugh.
News Segment Interruption (40:00 - 60:00) As the discussion continues, Christy Lee transitions into a news update about Cedric Lodge, a former manager at Harvard Medical School morgue indicted for theft and sale of human body parts:
The hosts handle the grim topic with a mix of astonishment and dark humor, making light of the bizarre nature of the crimes while maintaining sensitivity.
Holiday Segments and Comedic Interludes (60:00 - 90:00)
Valentine’s Day Special: Period Sex Chocolates (60:00 - 80:00) Chick McGee and Christy Lee discuss Kotex's unconventional Valentine's Day product, "Let's Have Period Sex Chocolates," blending humor with social commentary:
The hosts debate the product's appropriateness, leveraging witty banter and personal anecdotes about relationships and societal norms surrounding menstruation.
Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Nominations (80:00 - 90:00) Tom Griswold reviews the 2024 Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inductees, expressing surprise and skepticism about some nominations:
Chick McGee and Josh Arnold critique the choices with their characteristic humor, questioning the inclusion of certain artists while advocating for others.
Final Segments: Funny Stories and Closing Banter (90:00 - End)
Stupid World Record and Cosmonaut Stories (90:00 - 120:00) The hosts highlight bizarre world records and space-related anecdotes:
They humorously analyze the practicality and absurdity of such records, interspersed with fictional tales and exaggerated scenarios for comedic effect.
Snake and Pigeon Tales (120:00 - 160:00) Tom Griswold shares odd stories, including a snake ingesting a gear shift knob and a pigeon suspected of espionage:
The hosts use these stories to fuel their comedic exchanges, blending real news with fictional exaggerations.
Final Banter and Audience Engagement (160:00 - 180:00) The episode wraps up with the hosts engaging in rapid-fire jokes, fictional scenarios, and playful interactions:
They conclude by teasing upcoming segments, maintaining the high-energy, humorous atmosphere typical of The BOB & TOM Show.
Notable Quotes with Timestamps
These quotes exemplify the blend of humor and topical discussions that define the show's appeal.
Conclusion
The December 24, 2024, episode of The BOB & TOM Show delivers its usual mix of comedy, engaging guest interviews, and humorous takes on current events. From discussing unconventional Valentine's Day products to reviewing Rock and Roll Hall of Fame nominations, the hosts and guests navigate various topics with wit and charm. The inclusion of bizarre news stories and personal anecdotes adds depth and entertainment, ensuring a rich and enjoyable listening experience for both regular listeners and newcomers alike.