The BOB & TOM Show – February 18, 2026

Episode Overview

Today's episode of The BOB & TOM Show is a rollicking blend of comedy, witty banter, listener letters, and weird news headlines. The crew dives into timely topics such as Ash Wednesday traditions, creative code words for sex, peculiar historical contraceptives, bizarre animal-based beer additives, and the 2026 Winter Olympic Games. As always, the cast—Tom Griswold, Chick McGee, Josh Arnold, Christy Lee, Pat Godwin, Ace Cosby, and guest Jess Hooker—pepper the show with jokes, musical spoofs, and the sort of irreverent takes that have become their trademark.

Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Opening Comedy Song: "Monster Ash"

• [00:28] The show opens with Josh singing a parody about Frankenstein, Dracula, and their friend Leslie attending Ash Wednesday church service. The "monster ash" bit plays on both Ash Wednesday and the classic "Monster Mash" song, setting up a playful mood.
  • Quote: “On top of that, they didn't realize it was Ash Wednesday. And to their surprise, they got the ash. They got the monster ash.” —Josh Arnold

2. Ash Wednesday Traditions and Catholic Humor

• [03:07] Tom asks Christy about dealing with ashes when she has bangs, leading to a riff on how priests administer ashes through hair.
  • Quote: “Underneath it, Moses comes out and parts them.” —Josh Arnold [03:24]
• [04:07] Discussion on where churches get their ashes, with speculation about burning palm fronds versus buying ashes at Catholic supply stores.
• [05:22] Christy reveals she's “outgrown the fasting requirements,” referencing Catholic exemptions for people over 59.

3. Throat Blessing and Random Religious Practices

• [05:39] The crew wonders whether the “throat blessing” is an Ash Wednesday thing. Christy explains it's a separate ritual, and the group riffs on altar boy memories and the oddity of such practices.

4. Weird News: Beer With Animal Semen

• [06:20] Tom returns to a recurring story: beer containing various animal semen (deer, horse), prompting jokes about animal husbandry experts and the “sommelier” for semen.
  • Quote: “Maybe that's a cow. That's a horse. They've worked with it so much.” —Chick McGee [06:50]

5. Giving Something Up For Lent

• [08:10] Discussion about what people give up for Lent—desserts, booze, cursing. Josh jokes about the term 'Lent' and its linguistic confusion (“I can’t lend that day”).
• [09:00] Christy tells a story about golfing with her parish priest, who swears on the golf course but never at the pulpit.
  • Quote: “He would never say the GD word. Everything else was pretty much apparent.” —Christy Lee [09:33]

6. Olympic Sports Chat

• [10:17] Chick and Tom cover Olympic highlights: ski jumping, two-man bobsled (the Germans swept), and figure skating. Chick highlights the expensive engineering of bobsleds.
• [11:12] More on “Penis-gate” (ski jumpers’ uniform controversies) and “Vagina-gate.” It’s clear the crew delights in all things slightly inappropriate.

7. Ancient Contraceptives and Sexual Folklore

• [13:56] Tom brings up unusual contraceptives used throughout history: grapefruit, lemons, and crocodile dung (which Egyptians used as a barrier).
  • Quote: "You chew it, there’ll be no conception, because there's not a woman that'll get near you." —Tom Griswold [14:28]
• [40:21] They bring up weasel testicles tied to women’s legs in the Dark Ages to prevent pregnancy.
• [41:37] Ancient Greeks believed in jumping and sneezing after sex for contraception.

8. Listener Letters: Code Words for Sex

• [23:42] The gang reads listener submissions about secret code words for sex—like “balancing the checkbook” or “making a tuna fish sandwich.”
  • Quote: “Apparently that was their sex code word. Now do you want to make a tuna fish sandwich?” —Tom Griswold [24:23]

9. Childhood Memories: Cuss Jars and Paper Routes

• [09:51] Chick and Josh joke about cuss jars at home and “the hand” or “knuckle sandwich” discipline for cursing.
• [20:12] Nostalgic stories about being paperboys, putting newspapers in doors, and wage disputes. Tom recalls a classic story involving a set of twins and a paper route, hilariously derailed by the rest of the cast for being too obscure.

10. Comics & Code Words in Relationships

• [23:42] Emails about sexy code words (tuna sandwiches, balancing the checkbook, “helping with the taxes”), leading to riffs about plausible deniability for kids overhearing.

11. Random News: Gadgets, Gifts & Product Endorsements

• Aura digital photo frames: Multiple mentions and endorsements, with the cast joking about photos, storage, and family tech support. [52:57]
• TurtleBox Outdoor Speakers: Tom marvels at outdoor speaker tech and its place on ski slopes. [125:12]
• Hyundai Palisade Hybrid Plug: Christy gives a car review, extolling its range and interior features. [133:59]

12. More Listener Letters and Running Gags

• Recounting Chick’s legendary “retirement” fake-out. [43:08]
• Repeated callbacks to “the twins” story and the hosts’ collective confusion.
• Banter about code words, ancient contraception, and bodily function humor (e.g., bathroom logistics for men and women).

13. Musical Interludes & Parodies

• Hialeah Cocaine Songs: Pat Godwin performs two comedic songs about bales of cocaine washing up in Florida's Hialeah, to gospel-style music.
  • Quote: “Cocaine washed up on the shore in Hialeah, selling it on the streets is a bad idea…” —Pat Godwin [47:45], [157:42]
• White Castle Date Song: Pat spoofs romantic ballads with “Dates at White Castle” about the realities of low-budget romance.
  • Memorable line: "Onion breath kisses from your cheapskate boyfriend." —Pat Godwin [107:11]

14. Odd Science: Genetics and Radioactive Pigs

• [159:04] Christy reports on radioactive pigs from Fukushima breeding with wild boar, becoming “super pigs” and fueling both jokes and genuine curiosity from the cast.

15. Sexy Time with Ali Breen

• [136:30] Relationship columnist Ali Breen tackles questions about inappropriate wedding attire, mismatched libidos, paternity doubts, and whether weekly “happy ending” massages count as cheating.
  • Memorable exchange:
    • Ali: “He definitely gets them with happy endings.”
    • Chick: “Hey, hey, hey, this isn’t a laughing matter!” [146:06]

Notable Quotes & Moments

• The Monster Ash Parody [00:28–01:40]: Josh and Tom alternate on vocals; “They got the monster ash / Them out at mass.”
• On church ashes:
  • Tom: “Do you have to push your bangs aside, or does the priest do it?” [03:15]
  • Josh: “Underneath it, Moses comes out and parts them.” [03:24]
• On ancient contraceptives:
  • Tom: “The ancient Egyptians would shove a crocodile deficant quote up there.” [14:44]
  • Christy: “Right, that’ll keep me away.” [14:23]
• On Lent and code words:
  • Christy: “Church attendance—Is that in there?”
  • Tom: “Self-denial.” [08:16]
  • Chick: “You want any of this before I put it away?” [28:14]
• On Olympic controversies:
  • Chick: “More controversy in the ski jumping. You’ve heard of the so-called penis-gate…” [11:12]
  • Chick: “What would you do if one of the penis-gate participants drank a beer with horse semen in it?” [11:26]
• On bathrooms:
  • Jess: “I thought that you would use your sack like a hammer stomach to lay your whole package…” [102:19]
  • Tom: “When your nuts hit the water, it’s time to go.” [101:44]

Important Timestamps

• 00:28–01:40 – "Monster Ash" song parody
• 03:07 – Ash Wednesday and hair logistics
• 05:22 – Lent exemptions
• 06:20 – Beer with various animal semen
• 09:00 – Christy’s swearing priest story
• 10:17 – Olympic coverage
• 13:56 – Ancient contraception (crocodile dung)
• 23:42 – Listener code words for sex
• 43:08 – Chick’s fake retirement and football card gift
• 47:45, 157:42 – Pat Godwin's "Cocaine washed up on the shore in Hialeah" song
• 52:57 – Digital photo frame discussion
• 107:11 – Pat Godwin’s “Dates at White Castle” song
• 136:30–151:47 – Sexy Time with Ali Breen
• 159:04 – Radioactive pigs segment

Episode Tone & Energy

The show is an energetic, freewheeling mix of comedy, pop culture, nostalgia, and blue-collar wisdom. The cast constantly interrupts, riffs, and builds on each other's jokes, giving listeners the feeling of hanging out with a particularly sharp and mischievous group of friends. The tone is playful, irreverent, sometimes a little racy, but always inclusive and fast-paced.

Final Thoughts & Highlights

• Religiosity & Humor: The cast demonstrates how you can discuss religion with levity and respect: “It’s not anti-Christian, there’s a certain religiosity to it, but not in a negative way.” —Tom Griswold [03:50]
• Grounded by Listeners: Listener letters provide some of the best material, from code words for sex to stories about cussing and parenting.
• Unapologetically Irreverent: The BOB & TOM crew pull no punches when it comes to bodily function humor, odd science stories, or poking fun at each other’s non sequiturs and memory lapses.
• Jingle/Parody Heavy: Pat Godwin and the team’s musical numbers remain a signature highlight.
• Recurring Gags: The "twins" paperboy story, code words, and increasingly absurd asides keep both cast and audience on their toes.

For First-time Listeners

This episode captures the essence of the BOB & TOM Show: witty, inappropriate, and always a step away from complete chaos—but in the best possible way. The rapid pace, long-running inside jokes, and authentic camaraderie make even the oddest news stories into must-hear comedy.

For feedback or to submit your own sexy code word:
Email: bobandtom@bobandtom.com
Or find Ali Breen at ALLIBREEN on social media

Featured musical comedians on tour:
Catch Emo Phillips & Tim Cavanaugh at the Columbus Funny Bone, Summit City (Fort Wayne), and Toledo.

This summary skips commercials, intros, and outros; focus is squarely on the original, hilarious content.