The BOB & TOM Show - February 27, 2025

Summary

Podcast Title: The BOB & TOM Show Free Podcast
Host/Authors: The BOB & TOM Show | Cumulus Podcast Network
Episode: February 27, 2025
Release Date: February 27, 2025

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Summary:

The February 27, 2025 episode of The BOB & TOM Show delivers a lively mix of comedy, music, news, and engaging conversations. Hosted from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios, the show features regular contributors including Bob, Tom, Chick McGee, Josh Arnold, Pat Godwin, and Ace Cosby. Below is a detailed overview of the key segments and discussions from the episode.

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1. Josh Arnold’s Facial Hair Transformation

The episode opens with the hosts teasing Josh Arnold about his ongoing facial hair transformation. Josh is systematically removing his "winter's beard," transitioning through various styles.

• Tom Griswold [04:25]: "Once again, Josh has a sort of a method for getting rid of his so called winter's beard."

• Josh Arnold [05:00]: "Tomorrow the handlebars come off."

The team humorously compares Josh’s handlebar mustache to those of iconic figures, debating its sophistication and playfully questioning his seriousness.

2. Tribute and Sad News: Gene Hackman’s Passing

A somber moment is shared as the hosts discuss the tragic news of actor Gene Hackman's passing, along with his wife and their dog.

• Tom Griswold [12:28]: "Very sad note in the news. Gene Hackman, who was a friend of this show, he'd been on the show a couple times. Mr. Hackman was found dead, as was his wife and their dog."

They reflect on Hackman's illustrious career, citing his performances in classics like Hoosiers and The Birdcage, and express their condolences.

3. Fundraiser for Stead Family Children’s Hospital

The hosts highlight their ongoing fundraiser for the Stead Family Children’s Hospital in Iowa, emphasizing community support through T-shirt sales.

• Tom Griswold [14:35]: "We sold a whole bunch of T shirts, and we're donating that money to the Stead Family Children's Hospital in Iowa."

They commend the local teams and listeners for their contributions, sharing their excitement about reaching fundraising goals.

4. Listener Mishaps: Dropping Weights on Toes

Listener Monica shares a relatable mishap of dropping a 12-pound weight on her toes during an exercise class, prompting sympathetic and humorous responses.

• Josh Arnold [20:37]: "Oh, no, no, no. It hurts, I can hardly walk on it."

The team offers humorous advice and supportive comments, turning Monica’s mishap into a lighthearted segment.

5. NFL Players Association Report Card

A discussion about the NFL Players Association’s annual report card assesses team management based on player satisfaction.

• Bob [48:03]: "The Miami Dolphins are the top ranked team. They're number one."

• Tom Griswold [48:57]: "An average of 52 players per team."

Miami Dolphins and Minnesota Vikings top the list, while teams like the Steelers and Jets are in the bottom five. The conversation delves into the factors affecting player satisfaction and team performance.

6. Texting and Punctuation: Emotional Impact

The hosts explore a study indicating that excessive periods in text messages can amplify the perceived emotional intensity.

• Chick McGee [145:07]: "Researchers showed college students various text messages that had different forms of punctuation."

They discuss how texting styles influence communication, emphasizing the importance of context and tone in digital conversations.

7. Alternative Health Practices: Yoni Steam and Coffee Enemas

A humorous and informative segment covers alternative health practices like yoni steaming and coffee enemas. Hosts and listeners share personal experiences and discuss the purported benefits versus the skepticism from medical professionals.

• Tom Griswold [116:57]: "I did do the coffee enema and the steaming of the vagina thing."

• Chick McGee [119:26]: "Valerian root."

The conversation balances skepticism with light-hearted banter, providing insights into these unconventional practices.

8. Exotic Pets of Drug Dealers: Listener Stories

Listeners contribute bizarre tales about exotic animals kept by drug dealers, adding a quirky and entertaining element to the show.

• Bob [32:28]: "Crazy Dave had a bobcat."

• Pat Godwin [32:34]: "And the most famous one, of course, were importing the hippos."

Stories range from albino skunks to emus, enhancing the comedic atmosphere with outrageous anecdotes.

9. Recent News and Cultural References

The hosts touch on various cultural topics, including the evolution of NFL overtime rules, the popularity of mustaches, and classic song interpretations.

• Tom Griswold [60:32]: "How about this one? Do you know what this means? All caps, letters, as follows: I, Y, K. Y, K."

• Bob [112:11]: "What if you're eating another person? Maybe Kanchan."

These segments interweave cultural references with the show's comedic flair, keeping the audience engaged with diverse topics.

10. Closing Remarks and Upcoming Events

As the episode winds down, the hosts promote upcoming performances by Edwin McCain and comedians Willie G and Tommy Brennan, expressing gratitude towards their listeners for support in charitable initiatives.

• Tom Griswold [137:05]: "Thank you very much, Al. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studio."

The show concludes with final humorous exchanges and reminders about future events, maintaining the high-energy and entertaining tone characteristic of The BOB & TOM Show.

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This comprehensive summary encapsulates the blend of humor, heartfelt moments, informative discussions, and community engagement that defines The BOB & TOM Show. Whether teasing about facial hair or addressing serious news, the hosts ensure an entertaining and relatable experience for their nationwide audience.

Transcript

[Chick McGee]

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[Bob]

It'S the Bob and Tom Show.

[Pat Godwin]

Getting a sponge bath from one of the cute staff. All of us covered in Atlanticane.

[Tom Griswold]

Plugged.

[Pat Godwin]

In my CPAP Taking the long nap Check my leg there's a new spider vein Wasting away again in Margaritaville Searching for my lost Epsom salt Some people claim that it's my memory to blame But I don't know what was I talking about? I'm taking meds often to harden and soften Waiting all day for a big number two My nurse is a beauty A Cubano cutie How I got here I haven't a clue Wasting away again in Margaritaville Searching for my lost depths and salt Salt, salt, salt Some people claim that it's my memory to blame Some people claim that it's my memory.

[Tom Griswold]

Just said that I don't know what.

[Pat Godwin]

It'S my memory what was that talking about? Blew out my walker My roommate's a talker Broke my hip Now I'm here all alone but there's pills in the grinder and my nurse I'll remind her for that numbing concoction that helps me hang on Everybody was staying away again for the agent Searching for my lost Epsom Salt, salt, salt Some people claim that it's my memory to blame I don't know what was I talking about?

[Tom Griswold]

Look at this, man.

[Bob]

That slide whistle slapped right there.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, it did slap.

[Bob]

Damn, that's good. Good morning. Good morning, good, and hello. It's the Bobby Tub Show. Whoa, whoa. Jess Hooker at the Silac Insurance news desk.

[Chick McGee]

Hello.

[Bob]

There's Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hello, Chick.

[Bob]

Hello. There's Josh Arnold. Tom will go over his facial hair appearance this morning. There's Ace Cosby. Hey, I'm Chick Magee. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Why? Why you think this is so hilarious? It's kind of funny. But you're just.

[Tom Griswold]

I.

[Bob]

You're still a kindergartener. First grade. You're something. Look at him making fun of Josh Car.

[Tom Griswold]

I didn't say anything.

[Chick McGee]

I'm used to it now.

[Bob]

Yeah, I. I can't wait. So. I can't wait to get up to see what hair, facial hair you've got.

[Tom Griswold]

Once again, Josh has. Has a sort of a method for getting rid of his so called winter's beard. He's taking it off in chunks and now you're down to just the handlebar mustache.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Can you remove your headphones for a second? I want to see how much. Oh, you took the sideburns completely off.

[Bob]

Yeah, I like it nice and even too.

[Chick McGee]

Me too. I do too.

[Bob]

Gentlemen should be at the middle of the year.

[Tom Griswold]

That's right. To me you look like a social studies teacher who came back from vacation with a mustache that you're experimenting with.

[Josh Arnold]

Interesting.

[Tom Griswold]

But it's thicker though. I'll give you this. It looks thick.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I just can't take you seriously with it. I don't know.

[Bob]

Really?

[Josh Arnold]

Because I thought it added a sort of gravitational seriousness to me.

[Pat Godwin]

I think it does.

[Bob]

You look like that teacher, but there's more of a backstory. Like you were worked for the C. There's rumors you worked for the CIA.

[Tom Griswold]

But you don't talk about it as a male prostitute.

[Josh Arnold]

Do I look more. What if I do this? Like sort of come at you?

[Bob]

Like what about that?

[Tom Griswold]

I guess you could be kind of a badass. Anyone else? No one else gets the male prostitute vibe.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, no, I get what you're saying.

[Bob]

I understand you want a male that's.

[Josh Arnold]

Like weird leather hat.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. What's the leather guy in the Village, right?

[Bob]

Oh, where's the. Oh, who was that guy? The leather guy? It wasn't David Hodo. I'm. I'm concerned. I know a name of one of the Village People.

[Tom Griswold]

The current version of the Village People. The only original member is the lead singer who co wrote the songs. He. He put the rest of the guy.

[Josh Arnold]

I was surprised to find out a few months ago he actually wrote that song because. Oh yeah, Victor, the producer Victor.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, the two French guys, right? Yeah, yeah. But he, he co wrote. But in any event.

[Bob]

Oh yeah, Victor. Yes. He's a French guy.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, of course. In any event. We'll get some photographs posted. Now, is there another phase to this?

[Josh Arnold]

Tomorrow the handlebars come off.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, so then it's just a regular stash.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, and unfortunately it's Saturday so we're not going to get the toothbrush. AKA Hitler.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I'm not going to do that.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, that you can't even as a joke do that.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh no.

[Tom Griswold]

Can you imagine walking around town with a Hitler mustache.

[Josh Arnold]

Speaking of chaplain. Yeah, right.

[Tom Griswold]

You walk into Target Monday.

[Pat Godwin]

Monday you come in fresh face. Is that what you're saying?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Bob]

Oh, speaking of just the mustache, I don't know where this picture came from, but there was a bracket for bad mustaches among the show.

[Chick McGee]

Oh yeah, I saw that.

[Bob]

And do you remember me? And just a mustache. Check that out, huh?

[Tom Griswold]

That is.

[Chick McGee]

It's unfortunate.

[Bob]

It's part of it.

[Tom Griswold]

If I could explain. Right. You have quite a gray beard. Whitish beard now, but that is like a jet black.

[Bob]

Jet black hair. Well, I, I hadn't colored.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, it was natural. I mean, wasn't that of the era?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, no, no.

[Chick McGee]

But he has a small mouth, so it looks. It looks small.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, the stash does look good.

[Chick McGee]

It looks like a. A slightly bigger Hitler.

[Bob]

I should extend it past the corners of my mouth is what I should do.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, right, right.

[Bob]

Don't I look like every suspect on Dateline that you've ever seen?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, yeah.

[Bob]

If you see this man, take note. Good Lord.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, I josh. I congratulate. Now are you going to just. Then after Monday, then you'll do. Started to grow the beard again. Is that what happens?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, and I'm not going to get. It's not going to be a winter's beard. It'll be my summer's beard and it'll be. Oh, just shorter. I'll just keep it trimmed most of the time.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, like a two guard or you know.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah.

[Bob]

Tom's far too modest to mention this, but he had a goatee, a Van Dyke and the mustache, it looked really good.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, real good.

[Chick McGee]

So thick.

[Bob]

It's so thick and wonderful.

[Tom Griswold]

Thanks.

[Bob]

Yeah. See, he doesn't even want to talk about it.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, I, I don't.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I had that for years. I had it longer than. Well, I had it when I started here and it was already out of style.

[Tom Griswold]

It's kind of gone out of style.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, yeah. But I mean it looks. I still think it looks fine on.

[Bob]

Somebody said that that is going to turn out to be the mullet of whenever that was that generation, the early 2000s or whenever we.

[Tom Griswold]

By the way, fortunately the man bun is over, but almost over.

[Chick McGee]

There's still people that can just pull off long hair.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, no, long hair is fine. But the man bun, I like the man bun. It can work. Y name it. Who's it working for?

[Pat Godwin]

Joey, the waiter at my new place.

[Bob]

Joey the waiter. You know Joey, he's a great guy. Ringo. Ringo has a man bun. Yeah, he does every now and then. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

No, he had the. Ringo had the thing. At one point, he had the ponytail coming straight up from the top of his head.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And see, that shows that when you're so famous, none of your friends are going to. You know, someone should have Ringo, you look like a douchebag.

[Josh Arnold]

Get rid of it.

[Tom Griswold]

That's what. That's the problem. So you get to a certain status level, no one's going to pull you aside and go, hey, you know, you gotta. You gotta cut it out.

[Josh Arnold]

Or his friends went, hey, yeah, he's. He's doing whatever he wants.

[Bob]

You guys don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

Looking like a douchebag is a concrete thing. It's not a matter of opinion.

[Bob]

You guys don't know anybody like that. Where we couldn't tell him if he had a bad hairstyle or. You can't tell him anything. Right. He doesn't listen.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, no, no, no, I. Believe me, I have many children and a girlfriend. I don't get away with anything. Which reminds me.

[Bob]

That's right.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm getting a haircut today. There may have been some criticism. I let it go too long.

[Bob]

Oh, I hadn't noticed. I don't know what you're talking about.

[Tom Griswold]

Other sides are a little messy.

[Bob]

I like your sideburns.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Bob]

They are way past bottom of your ear. They're.

[Josh Arnold]

The women in your life are wrong about them.

[Bob]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, you tell.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Bob]

I'd be glad to.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm a minority in my own household. Did you ever. By the way, this kind of reminds me of something.

[Bob]

Oh, God.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, Jess, you're a smart person. You know your way around a kitchen also.

[Bob]

That's right. Make me a sandwich and.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, this. So the other day. I always do the dishes. I enjoy doing the dishes.

[Chick McGee]

Right.

[Bob]

You have a system. You have a system.

[Tom Griswold]

But I have a system. I don't want anyone in the kitchen anywhere near me. And people are always hovering. And one of my dogs is cleaning all the plates as I stack them up. The day I came in. And she goes, I had to redo the entire dishwasher. What?

[Bob]

Oh, no.

[Tom Griswold]

What? I had it all done. Pulling everything out and rested. No, that's. That is a real. What is that word? A passive aggressive.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Redoing the dishwasher setup before you turn it on.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. I don't. I get. I. Not from. As long as everything's clean, I'm not worried about it.

[Josh Arnold]

Did she posit any theories or reasons why?

[Tom Griswold]

Because I'm an idiot, apparently. I.

[Chick McGee]

She just didn't like the way you did it.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Bob]

See, now you got two.

[Chick McGee]

You're a clean guy. I feel like you would love the dishwasher better than me.

[Bob]

Kind of a passive aggressive also, you're assuming.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, I'm sure she had a reason and it was a good reason. And I support whatever Kelly does.

[Bob]

She does. Jess doesn't want to take sides, but, yeah, she supports.

[Josh Arnold]

To me, that's a violent, complete violation.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I know what I'm doing.

[Josh Arnold]

Grounds for dismissal coming up.

[Tom Griswold]

Coming up, we have your letters. You can reach us, Bob and tomobandtom.com, always a pleasure hearing from you. I've got a stack of important letters we have to get to. And by the way, once again, thanks to our guest yesterday, Edwin McCain. And I'll remind you that he's going to be in Skokie, Illinois tonight. He's on a little tour. He'll be in Rockford, then Council Bluffs, then Minnesota this weekend. Also, while I'm at it, Willie G. Is. He was in Nashville, Tennessee last night with Tommy Brennan. They're going to be our guest tomorrow. Tonight they're at the Louisville Comedy Club. Coming up, we have a lot of really interesting things in the news. I'm very excited about today's show. Oh, by the way, very sad note in the news.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, no.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, very sad note. Gene Hackman, who was a friend of this show, he'd been on the show a couple times. Mr. Hackman was found dead, as was his wife and their dog.

[Josh Arnold]

My gosh.

[Tom Griswold]

At their home in Santa Fe, New Mexico. The police aren't saying what it was. They're saying no foul play. I would suspect it might be a carbon monoxide thing.

[Chick McGee]

Welfare check.

[Tom Griswold]

They don't know.

[Bob]

And they had been there for quite some time, I guess.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, what a drag.

[Josh Arnold]

There was always footage of him walking around New Mexico.

[Tom Griswold]

95 years old.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

That's awful.

[Chick McGee]

What kind of sad?

[Bob]

What kind of. I don't think I could, you know. Okay, I'm taking my camera and I'm looking for stars walking around downtown and they really don't look like they ever used to look like.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Bob]

Who.

[Josh Arnold]

Exactly.

[Bob]

That's the reason we want a picture of them, because they look really, really old.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, that's always been so gross.

[Bob]

God.

[Tom Griswold]

He's apparently walked around Santa Fe and.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, you could.

[Tom Griswold]

All the time.

[Chick McGee]

And he.

[Pat Godwin]

What a guy.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. And he spans, I mean, decades. Right. Because I. I know him from Hoosiers and. And the Birdcage. My favorite movies. Yeah. Yeah. But then I was reading all the Other things he's done.

[Tom Griswold]

We asked her for what French Connection and the is the Unforgiven. Did he win? Josh run for yes.

[Bob]

Supporting.

[Pat Godwin]

So good.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. But he was in our studios and participated in some of our idiot idiocy. Gladly. Cool.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Always seemed like a cool guy.

[Tom Griswold]

Hoosier's a terrific movie. One of the many great movies anyway, so that's tragic. That's sad news today. Now, also coming up, we'll visit with Al Jackson, who we just saw in Iowa. And we should have a number today, by the way, we sold a whole bunch of T shirts, and we're donating that money to the Stead Family Children's Hospital in Iowa. And we should have a figure on that. And by the way, we are putting together a couple of other shirts for a couple visits coming up. I can't say where they'll be. Greater Cincinnati and Toledo. So be on the lookout for those. We'll be telling you about those.

[Bob]

Were you guys sitting here when I did that yesterday? And he got mad at me? Do you remember that?

[Tom Griswold]

You already spilled the beans.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Bob]

Do you hear this? Do you hear this? You ever eat this? Have you seen this?

[Tom Griswold]

Right now, pay close attention. The Baba Tom show is sponsored by BetterHelp. No, BetterHelp is a way to access therapy. You've been thinking about therapy, but there may be some. Some hurdles. You know, I don't want to go to an office with someone I don't know. I don't want to drive across town, blah, blah, blah. Well, how about this? BetterHelp is done fully online, and 5 million people are taking advantage of this particular system. 30,000 credentialed therapists are part of it. What am I talking about? Well, you go online, you fill out a questionnaire, and you'll be matched up with a therapist. You can switch therapists anytime, no additional fees. And we're talking about therapists with a wide range of specialties. So if you're working on a relationship or working on yourself for some reason, building friendships, whatever it might be, and you want some counsel, well, BetterHelp is a great way to access therapy. Once again, it's all done online. So you can do it like a zoom call with a camera going or without the camera, like a phone call or even texting back and forth. It's all up to you. Where you do it is also up to you. You can do it in your car, in the parking lot with a cell phone if you want. Get all the [e-mail] BTShow the BTShow will knock 10% off your first month. That's BetterHelp. H E L P betterhelp.com BTShow removing some of those hurdles when it comes to trying out therapy. Betterhelp.com BTShow coming right back with a demand. Not a request. A demand for a song from Mr. Godwin and the North.

[Bob]

A new feature in sports. Tom is the smartest man in the world. We have two examples.

[Josh Arnold]

Wow.

[Bob]

You will be bowled over. As I was.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Bob]

Give him his flowers. Isn't that what they say? Right?

[Tom Griswold]

I have no idea what that means, but we are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios and this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Bob]

Get in the zone. Auto zone.

[Josh Arnold]

Welcome to the A to Z savings event at AutoZone. Yeah, happy to be here. Can I get some rotors? Would you like brake pads with that? How much are the brake pads free with the rotors Free? Really, really free.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. I also need some oil.

[Josh Arnold]

Would you like an oil filter with that?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

How much is that free? With five quarts of oil? Free.

[Tom Griswold]

Really, really free. It's part of the A to Z Savings event. You might as well call it A.

[Josh Arnold]

To free at autozone. Get in the zone. Autozone restrictions apply.

[Bob]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. Hello, Hello, Hello. Thursday rolls on Jess Hooker here at the Silac Insurance news desk. There's Josh Arnold.

[Josh Arnold]

Hi.

[Bob]

With yet another facial hair style.

[Josh Arnold]

Thank you. I like this one.

[Bob]

The long mustache down to the bottom of the chin. Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, is that very nice. Is handlebar the same as a Fu Manchu?

[Bob]

I think.

[Tom Griswold]

Doesn't the Fu Manchu actually go down below the chin and keep going dangling?

[Bob]

No, I is a Fu Manchu and a handlebar goes up at the corners. I thought like Raleigh fingers.

[Josh Arnold]

The Internet says both, so. So who knows?

[Bob]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

I. Some places called this a handlebar. Some places called the one you're talking about, the rolly fingers. A handlebar. So maybe they're both.

[Bob]

Well, you know.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, there are always different styles of handlebars even on bikes, aren't there?

[Ace Cosby]

Certainly.

[Bob]

And you know, Confucius say most men smoke. No. Yes, most men smoke. Boom.

[Tom Griswold]

And chew. I. Yeah, we got the joke. I. I thought you're gonna do the one about man who fart in church sitting on pew.

[Bob]

Oh, that one too. I like that one very much.

[Tom Griswold]

Now Jess Hooker is here with us. Jesse, you're. You can represent all women, of course.

[Chick McGee]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

How do you feel about the mustaches where they. They grow it on the sides real long and then they Wax it up and turn it up.

[Chick McGee]

I have issue with any man who takes longer to get ready for than I do. That's my. Like, if you're putting that much effort into it.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't. Out in the public, you see a man who's clearly.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

More groomed than most. Yeah. You go, oh, no.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. That's not for me.

[Tom Griswold]

I know a guy that's a really good guy and he does that. I've never.

[Josh Arnold]

I think it looks. It can look really cool.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, I'm sure it does. Yeah. I mean, I. Yeah. Whatever you're into. How about that?

[Bob]

Patrick Bateman puts on a skin emollient every morning.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, geez. He's got his whole.

[Bob]

Has the mask. He has a mask he peels off.

[Chick McGee]

Who does this.

[Josh Arnold]

Good symbolism, too.

[Bob]

It's. It's from a movie.

[Tom Griswold]

America, so. But you wouldn't not want to hook up with a guy with a.

[Chick McGee]

It would take a lot of effort on his part.

[Tom Griswold]

The waxy mustache would.

[Bob]

Would you. Do you. Tom, don't take this the wrong way, but do you. Do you moisturize? You know, on your face? A little moisturizer?

[Tom Griswold]

No.

[Bob]

Oh, you got a boy.

[Pat Godwin]

Gotta go with Ursa Major in the morning.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Ursa Major.

[Tom Griswold]

What?

[Pat Godwin]

Change your life.

[Josh Arnold]

Is that right?

[Chick McGee]

It is a good brand.

[Tom Griswold]

I think I have some Major.

[Pat Godwin]

Is that Ursa Major?

[Tom Griswold]

Like that's Constellation?

[Bob]

I thought I had some moisturizer here. I brought in.

[Chick McGee]

It is.

[Josh Arnold]

I've got some utterly smooth over here at my desk.

[Tom Griswold]

That's good too.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

That's for your nipples.

[Josh Arnold]

It's for your nipples.

[Bob]

It's for your teeth.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, right. Yeah. And it's.

[Tom Griswold]

Is it utterly. A, U, D, D, E, R, L, Y. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

And I do cocoa butter, so that works.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, clearly.

[Chick McGee]

It smells good. You smell like chocolate all day.

[Tom Griswold]

There again. It's so awkward.

[Bob]

Black don't crack.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Time now to review some letters that you have been kind enough to correspond with the Bob and Tom program. What have you got over there?

[Bob]

I'm good. Just got this one, I guess. Other ones anyway. Hello. Wonderful Jess. And you little boys.

[Chick McGee]

Hi.

[Bob]

This is from Monica. You were talking about dropping stuff on your toes yesterday.

[Tom Griswold]

This is an Internet. Internet thing which people are videotaping themselves dropping heavy objects on their toes.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm all for it.

[Bob]

As heavy. I've. I saw them dropping their phone on there and I couldn't stand watching that. It looked like it hurts so much.

[Tom Griswold]

But the idea. I guess. Apparently they go up the scale and heavier and heavier things on their Toes.

[Bob]

Well, this morning, Monica continues. I was in exercise class and putting away my 12 pound weights and it slipped out of my hand and fell onto my toes. Holy s. Does that hurt?

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, there's no doubt.

[Bob]

Yeah, still hurts. I can hardly walk on it. Your toe might be broken, Monica. You guys are the best. Thanks for the laugh, Monica.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

It hurts. It hurts to drop things on your feet.

[Tom Griswold]

It's dumb to.

[Bob]

Don't do that.

[Tom Griswold]

Post that.

[Josh Arnold]

I like that these guys, these kids are out there doing it.

[Bob]

Well, most of the things I, I like. There's epic fails on Instagram, falling over and. What's the other one?

[Chick McGee]

People getting scared is always funny.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, that's good too.

[Bob]

Satisfying Gravity is the name of the site. It. They're wonderful, Tom.

[Josh Arnold]

People slipping.

[Bob]

Oh.

[Josh Arnold]

Because we've all been there. We all.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah. People falling. My. I did. I love the one where the guy's walking through the mall staring at his phone and there's a fountain and he falls completely into it.

[Bob]

Walks right into it.

[Tom Griswold]

That's a classic.

[Josh Arnold]

I saw one yesterday and I went to Oscar. I go, I know this has happened to you at some point, but can we just talk about the pain that is walking into a ball hitch behind a truck.

[Bob]

Oh, man.

[Chick McGee]

Where it hits on your shin. The whole thing, it's awful.

[Bob]

There's a guy doing that.

[Josh Arnold]

There's nothing like it.

[Bob]

His wife is at a truck. They have their trucks parked beside each other and she's putting something in the way back and her gate starts to go down on her head and she goes, oh. And he runs from his side of the truck over to help her and he hits the trailer hitch with his shin. And so they're both on the ground in pain.

[Josh Arnold]

I mean, there's nothing like that pain.

[Chick McGee]

It's so bad.

[Bob]

Totally surprise. Out of nowhere, wham.

[Tom Griswold]

We have a request for a song here, Pat.

[Bob]

Oh. Oh.

[Tom Griswold]

We had a news story yesterday out of Colombia. Man was arrested for trying to smuggle $10,000 worth of cocaine under his wig. In a video shared by the Colombian National Police, it shows the 40 year old suspect attempting to board a flight from Cartagena to Amsterdam. In the clip you can see authorities removing the hairpiece, finding several what they call discs of cocaine attached to the bottom of the toupee. 400 doses of cocaine is how the police described it. And we discussed also what the Nick, the, the, the, these slang terms for toupees.

[Bob]

Oh, yeah, wig, Wig. You came up with a couple rug.

[Tom Griswold]

I didn't come up with them. I found my English friend used to always call them an Irish.

[Bob]

An Irish.

[Tom Griswold]

He's got an Irish on his head.

[Pat Godwin]

I never heard that. And I'm Irish.

[Tom Griswold]

He was a cockney. Is a cockney British. Oh, and he would all he had. He was at a big thing about him.

[Bob]

I think there are a bunch of insults for Irish people.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, yeah. English hate us.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. This says a wig hairpiece, rug pastiche and. And wiglet. And of course, one of my favorite songs has the term wig hat. I'm sure you're familiar with this song, Ms. Hooker. Put on your high heeled sneakers. Wear your wig hat on your head.

[Bob]

Is it high heeled sneakers? That's the lyric.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Put on your high heel sneaker. Wig hat on your head.

[Bob]

That seems way ahead of its time.

[Tom Griswold]

No. I love you, baby. Pretty soon you're gonna knock them dead.

[Josh Arnold]

I'll find.

[Bob]

I'll find.

[Tom Griswold]

That's all. That's a classic. But in any event, the authorities in Columbia. This guy's trying to smuggle the cocaine under his. Under his hairpiece. I'm gonna make a TV show out of it called Breaking Bald.

[Bob]

Very nice.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, Pat. Yeah. Continuing the tradition on this burger.

[Pat Godwin]

So we'd like to know where you got the cocaine. Yeah, we'd like to know where you got cocaine. There's coke in the rug. Coke in the rug, baby.

[Tom Griswold]

Coke in the rug.

[Pat Godwin]

Flip the mat over.

[Bob]

Coke in the rug.

[Pat Godwin]

Coke in the rug maybe coke in the rug. Customs watching you, scratching your head. Your toupee drags a little to the left. There's too much dandruff. And that rug's too big. You're looking guilty in that powdered wig. Get it? Powdered wig, powdered wig. There's coke in the rug. So please explain. Someone has the answer for his cocaine. Would like to know where you got the cocaine. Yeah, we'd like to know where you got the cocaine. There's coke and rug. Coke and rug, maybe coke in the rug. Flip the mat all off. Coke and rug, Coke and rug, maybe coke in the rug. Here we go.

[Josh Arnold]

Go get a rug.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, much. Thank you very much. Here we go.

[Bob]

Oh, yeah, here we go. Wig hat.

[Pat Godwin]

Put on your red.

[Bob]

Dress.

[Tom Griswold]

Nice little organ in there.

[Bob]

This should end up in a song.

[Tom Griswold]

You ever heard this?

[Chick McGee]

No.

[Bob]

Lord, I'm down.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, it's great. I'll beat.

[Pat Godwin]

In case some fool might.

[Josh Arnold]

Wanna find he was walking around with boxing gloves on.

[Pat Godwin]

All right.

[Bob]

And KSUM 4, one of five.

[Pat Godwin]

Put on your high heel sneakers.

[Tom Griswold]

High heeled sneakers, huh? Wear your wig hat on your Head who is here come. Oh, are you kidding? Tommy Tucker. Wait and show. Does it ever get any better than that?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I love it.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, that great. Dude, that is.

[Bob]

That could be the first song ever written.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean it's so much stuff.

[Bob]

Everything has come from that song.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, yeah, and it came from the great blues world, but God, is that great.

[Bob]

His name's Tommy Tucker.

[Tom Griswold]

Wear your wig hat on your head.

[Josh Arnold]

I know the song, but I. No another version.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I think that somebody else did it. Yeah, that was the one that. I don't know. I don't know what the biggest hit version was. I thought it was that maybe not.

[Pat Godwin]

I don't think wig hat was a stretch lyrically or there was an actual wig hat at that time.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, the reason I mentioned it because it was in a list of slang terms for toupees.

[Bob]

Oh, I think he needed two syllables there.

[Pat Godwin]

That's what I thought.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but still it's very descriptive.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, and high heel sneakers isn't correct either, so it's also indicative a man.

[Tom Griswold]

But yeah, yeah, they do make high heeled sneakers now.

[Josh Arnold]

Sure, sure. But not that.

[Bob]

What are they called? Sky highs.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, I have quite the collection of them actually.

[Josh Arnold]

You didn't see them in the Delta very often.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah. While working in the fields, high heels they would get tend to be.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh no, I just said Delta.

[Bob]

I said we were. We were fine.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Let's just say working aboard a barge in the Mississippi.

[Bob]

There you go.

[Tom Griswold]

Rarely did you have a females employed in anything is amaz be prostitution.

[Bob]

I feel like I need to give you $15. I don't know why, but I. I will.

[Josh Arnold]

Almost last day of the month.

[Bob]

I owe you 15 now here on the.

[Tom Griswold]

On the Johnny Cash official website, they have a live version of high heel sneakers by the great Carl Perkins.

[Bob]

Oh, I bet that's badass.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I've never heard that one. I'll have to. Have to dig that up.

[Bob]

His version of Blue suede shoes always threw me. There's like an extra beat in it or something. Yeah, Elvis did it way different. So differently. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I'll have to look.

[Bob]

This might be a podcast topic.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, it doesn't like a podcast. Yeah, yeah, that's all right.

[Josh Arnold]

Introduced us to Tommy Tucker. We appreciate that.

[Tom Griswold]

Tommy Tucker, Dear Bob and Tom show writes Debbie Deborah. Josh looks younger without that forest of hair on his face. Thinner too. She writes.

[Josh Arnold]

I would think the getting rid of that huge swath of gray definitely makes me look younger.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, that's what it is because you had just that, that below the chin. Yeah, that was almost white.

[Bob]

I've always thought that the big. A bigger, thicker mustache or a beard, which I don't. I like the closer trimmed beard because the big one reminds me of wearing. Being very overweight and wearing a mumu and trying to cover everything. You know what I mean?

[Josh Arnold]

Oh really?

[Bob]

That's what that a big bushy beard reminds me of. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I've got this letter from Eric. Jess Hooker was absolutely correct yesterday.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I love it already.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm a male turning 43 next week. I could be retired in Florida by now. About how much I've paid one way or the other for sex. You. What was your quote? You Pay for it 1.

[Chick McGee]

You guys are paying for it one way or the other because we are charging.

[Pat Godwin]

I think women are a gift.

[Chick McGee]

Shut up, Pat.

[Bob]

That one marriage, I'd be doing this. Talking into a microphone in south beach, looking out at the waves, deciding which boat to take out today as opposed.

[Tom Griswold]

To now, as opposed to looking at the waves thinking, well, I could just leave my clothes on and just keep.

[Bob]

I could just keep walking.

[Tom Griswold]

Don't even lift your arms to attempt to make a stroke when you get out there. There you go. That's fun.

[Bob]

Good morning, goofballs. I don't know how we started talking about this, but this, especially this topic, seems to be open at all times. Here's the most pretentious thing I've ever done. Over the weekend I attended a 5K wooden ski wine and cheese event. Oh, this is Nordic skiing, Tom. Or cross country skiing. Real men ski uphill, he says. I was on my father's 50 year old skis and feeling great after a mug full of red wine at one in the afternoon, I drunkenly slogged to the next cup of wine. What should come on my Raycon earbuds, but hypnotized by Bob.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, all right, how about that?

[Bob]

In my best Josh voice, I loudly sang glasses, the sides look like glass.

[Tom Griswold]

Great song.

[Bob]

He was not offered wine at the next stop.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, flagged.

[Bob]

I have Welch Madness.

[Tom Griswold]

He says once again. I certainly recommend the Bob Welch Fleetwood Mac era. Pre Stevie Nicks, Lindsay Buckingham and then before Bob Welch, obviously one of the greatest guitarists of all time. Oh well, yeah. So early. Fleetwood Mac is wonderful music and we've.

[Bob]

Been going over drug dealers and their pets. A couple days ago we had an albino skunk and I forget what we had. Alligator.

[Tom Griswold]

It also the 70s 80s era marijuana dealer. They always had some exotic pet at scenes.

[Bob]

Something interesting. This is from Patrick. He had A dealer. He has several dealers here. Crazy Dave had a bobcat.

[Josh Arnold]

A bobcat.

[Tom Griswold]

That's crazy.

[Bob]

A guy by the name of Big G had a pot belly pig that would drink and smoke.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, man.

[Bob]

But my favorite was Mountain. He had three emus.

[Tom Griswold]

What?

[Bob]

And was having emu babies. Oh, three emu.

[Tom Griswold]

And then you get to the next level, the dealers. Dealers. And then that's. There's. Those are the guys that always have the tigers.

[Bob]

Yeah, yeah. It jumps up a notch.

[Tom Griswold]

And the most famous one, of course, were importing the hippos.

[Bob]

Oh.

[Tom Griswold]

Africa to Escobar had the hippos. Which is now what do they now have some like 1200 of them in a river. And they're ruining the ecology.

[Bob]

Huge problem in Colombia. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Wow.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know what, but if you have a good drug dealer story and they're exotic pets.

[Bob]

Yeah, send it in.

[Tom Griswold]

But it's the same thing is true. Like Michael Jackson. He wasn't a drug dealer, but he had so much money that he could, you know, suddenly have a monkey around all the time.

[Bob]

Well, midlife crisis doesn't have to be a sports car sometimes. Josh Arnold, you want to make kids build a zoo.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. I mean, you know, come on. When you're right, you're right.

[Bob]

Checking the trap.

[Tom Griswold]

The best way to. The best way to listen to us. Insulting your favorite drug dealer or musician is to wear those Raycon earbuds.

[Bob]

Raycon earbuds. It's time for you to fall back in love with music. Discover true love's perfect pair of earbuds. Those are the Raycons. And they've been upgraded. You could take them to the gym to work. They'll be your phone call buddy. Premium audio that goes where you go. And Raycon's latest model, better than ever. 32 hour battery life. Multi point connectivity lets you pair with two devices at once. And Raycon's quick charge function. 10 minutes of charging yields 90 minutes of battery. And the earbuds also come with active noise cancellation starting at just half the price of other premium audio brands. And Raycons has a 30 day happiness guarantee return policy. Go to buyraycon.com Tom Today get up to 20% off the entire site. That's right. Get up to 20% off everything on Raycon's website, including 20% off all headphones. Go to buyraycon dot com Tom that's buyraycon.com Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much, Chick McGee. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Ace Cosby]

For a complete copy of Bob and Tom Show Contest rules, go to bobandtom.com contest rules. Or just scroll down to the bottom of the page and see Contest Rules. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Tom Griswold]

No one knows music like Rolling Stone.

[Josh Arnold]

Senior writer Brian Hyatt talks the biggest.

[Bob]

Music news from the biggest stars.

[Al Jackson]

Almost everyone is teaming up on Drake.

[Tom Griswold]

It's like Drake versus the world.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Bob]

You first met Prince.

[Tom Griswold]

You were driving for him before you.

[Bob]

Were drumming for him. That's correct.

[Pat Godwin]

Steven Wonder. You kind of have to understand how.

[Tom Griswold]

Stevie began white radio.

[Ace Cosby]

That's where the money was.

[Tom Griswold]

That's what still is Rolling Stone music.

[Josh Arnold]

Now follow and listen on your favorite platform.

[Bob]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. Hello, hello, hello. Jess Hooker, Pat Godwin, Josh Arnold, Ace Cosby. I'm Chick Magee. We're at the O'Reilly Auto Parts studio. Think O'Reilly Auto Parts. For all your car care needs. Get the parts and service you need fast from the professional parts people at O'Reilly Auto Parts. Hello, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello, Chick McGee.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, sir.

[Tom Griswold]

I look around the room and I see the very handsome.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm here every day.

[Tom Griswold]

I was just waiting. It was just out there for one of you guys to pick up. And knowing it, the very handsome Josh Arnold. I say that because Josh is working this facial hair thing. He has taken his winter beard and is taking it off in phases. We are now on phase four. This is the.

[Bob]

Please. It's winter's beard.

[Tom Griswold]

What did I say?

[Bob]

Winter beard.

[Tom Griswold]

Sorry. Winter's beard. Winter's beard. Yeah. It sounds like from a poem.

[Bob]

Yes, it does.

[Tom Griswold]

Whose beard this is? I think I know. You know the old.

[Josh Arnold]

Sure, it's very poetic.

[Tom Griswold]

Into that poem.

[Bob]

Scooby Dooby Doo.

[Tom Griswold]

Whose horse this is? I think I know. Robert Frost.

[Chick McGee]

I don't.

[Bob]

Bobby Frost.

[Tom Griswold]

Whose horse this is? I think I know. The women are in the village so I come My little horse must think me queer to shove. Wait a minute. That's not how it goes.

[Chick McGee]

I didn't learn that one.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I forgot the real lyrics.

[Bob]

Bobby Chills, what they call him now.

[Tom Griswold]

In today's hip hop world, he would be Bobby Chill.

[Bob]

Bobby Chill. You know, there's video of him on YouTube reading.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but he read up the Kennedy inaugural.

[Bob]

Yeah. Oh, this was just like him sitting on a couch somewhere.

[Tom Griswold]

By the. By the way, Kennedy assassination buffs, if there's such a thing. Clint Hill died last week.

[Josh Arnold]

Now tell us who he was.

[Tom Griswold]

He was the famous Secret Service agent that he's part of that when the bullets were Flying. He ran to the car. Oh. And shoved Mrs. Kennedy back in.

[Josh Arnold]

Gotcha.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

And it ruined the guy's life and is incredibly upset about it.

[Bob]

He felt that they threw his shoulder up someone.

[Josh Arnold]

Never the same after that.

[Bob]

Remember, Mrs. Kennedy wasn't trying to help a Secret Service person into the car. She was trying to get the hell out of that car before they kept shooting.

[Josh Arnold]

That was a. Oh, that seemed obvious to me. Did people argue that she was trying to.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Help. No, she was.

[Bob]

They were trying to make her.

[Josh Arnold]

She's scrambling for her life and why wouldn't she?

[Bob]

Absolutely.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Bob]

You're sitting there and all of a sudden, man.

[Tom Griswold]

He was publicity shy for a long time, but it really. He felt terrible about the whole thing. In any event, we'll move forward. Here we have a song from Pat now, a tribute to Josh's.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah, you do?

[Tom Griswold]

I guess. Would this be where the hirsute pursuit would that be?

[Josh Arnold]

Okay, that's fun.

[Tom Griswold]

Now Josh is down to. He's gone from no chin hair with the full beard. And then we have.

[Josh Arnold]

We had the mutton chops, then we had the separate mustache from the mutton.

[Bob]

Chops, if you will. The biker mutton chops.

[Tom Griswold]

Maybe now it's just a Fu Manchu or a handlebar mustache, I guess. I think the handlebar mustache is technically this one that twirls up.

[Bob]

That's what I. Yeah, the Raleigh fingers.

[Josh Arnold]

That's what I always classified as well, but.

[Tom Griswold]

So we'll call this the Fu Manchu. No sideburns. And Pat, you've got your tribute little Jimmy Buffett.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, Josh. He likes his movies and all kinds of genres. Porno retro, Night of the Iguana. He wears his facial hair in all kinds of styles. A bushy old beard and a hairy old smile. I wish I had a mustache like Josh has the 70s porno kind. Carhartt shirt and a hot green tea. Fishing shorts that smell like reservoir slime. I remember being young like Josh, with a sunny disposition, which showbiz beat me down. And now I failed the audition. Well, I wish I had a mustache like Josh has had his personality, too.

[Bob]

And you're right.

[Josh Arnold]

On any given day, I will watch a little porn and then something like Night at the Iguana.

[Tom Griswold]

Very sophisticated.

[Bob]

That is a full day.

[Josh Arnold]

It sure is.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, thank you very much. Now we had a chance to hear a little bit of the song High Heeled Sneakers. Or high heel sneakers, depending from Tommy Tucker. And we were trying to figure that it was his version that was in the top 100 and way back in 1964. I feel like Casey.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, it feels older than that. But I. I love that they captured that sound.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. And it's the lyric, as you mentioned. It's a. Put on your red dress, baby, Lord, we're going out tonight. And wear some boxing gloves in case some fool might want to fight. And then when I googled high heeled sneakers, the first thing that came up, dozens of ads for actual sneakers that are high heeled.

[Bob]

Sure sky highs.

[Chick McGee]

Well, there's a lady, the lady that developed Spanx. Oh, she actually did. It is. It's a. It's a full heel. It's not like a wedge shoe. And she's selling them, and I looked them up. That 500 bucks.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

That's Seems like a lot.

[Tom Griswold]

Look really uncomfortable.

[Chick McGee]

They look wildly uncomfortable.

[Bob]

I don't know how ladies walk in high heels anyway.

[Chick McGee]

Practice.

[Josh Arnold]

No, it's crazy.

[Bob]

That's the only reason I'm not. I don't cross dresses. I couldn't handle the shoes. Yeah, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Get you a kitten heel. It's a little one.

[Bob]

Oh, yeah. It's called a kitten heel.

[Chick McGee]

It is.

[Bob]

I might like that.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, that. That. That threw me in connections one day in the New York Times.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Those wacky shoe terms. I was way. I lost.

[Bob]

I come in here in kitten heels, a big wig, and a red dress. Am I still welcome, Tom?

[Tom Griswold]

Of course. I don't care. Do whatever you want.

[Bob]

How long do you think it's a free country? How long you think it'd be before Tom noticed dressed as a pretty lady. What a.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, whatever you're into.

[Bob]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

And I know there is actually a store that specializes in large shoes for people who cross dress.

[Bob]

It's a growing part of their business.

[Tom Griswold]

We are a person in here that was into that. And yeah, that was a.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Bob]

You try finding size 14 shoes.

[Tom Griswold]

And a lot of the NBA guys go to a store in Atlanta, Right. There's. That specializes in gigantic shoes.

[Bob]

Very specific.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Bob]

I think it's where Shaq gets his shoes. Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

So very, very cool. Well, thank you very much, Pat. Coming up, we have some interesting stuff in the world of sports. A story that in the NFL, a new.

[Bob]

A new feature in sports. Tom is the smartest man in the world. And you will find out why. I. I know we all suspected it.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Bob]

It's been verified.

[Tom Griswold]

Plus a bizarre story about why there is this fad of women wearing glitter on dates. And it's.

[Bob]

Isn't there a lotion that has glitter in it?

[Chick McGee]

You can get Lotion with glitter. You can. There's also sprays.

[Bob]

I think that's what I do with my kitten heels and my wig and.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, spray glitter.

[Tom Griswold]

They've got everything. There's one called Clitter, which is also a lube.

[Josh Arnold]

That's an fds. Oh, a loop.

[Tom Griswold]

When we come back.

[Bob]

Does FDS stand for Feminine Deodorant Spray? It does. All right. That seems pretty cut and dried. Why didn't they come up with some, you know, beautiful name like. Like, yeah, Rose aroma or something like that?

[Josh Arnold]

Bouquet.

[Bob]

Yeah, we know what it's for.

[Josh Arnold]

We're not gonna just call it feminine deodorant spray because we're not animals.

[Bob]

That's right. Coochie smells better or something. Right?

[Tom Griswold]

I'm just gonna let you guys twirl. These are the O'Reilly Auto Part Studios, and this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Ace Cosby]

Thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom show this morning. The show is also out there for you on our YouTube channel. Watch and subscribe.

[Bob]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. At the Silac Insurance news desk, it's Jess Hooker. Hi, there's Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hey, Chick.

[Bob]

By the way, Tom, Jess wearing a V neck sweater in the color of titty pink over there.

[Tom Griswold]

Tiddy pink. What's the name of that color?

[Chick McGee]

It is not the name of this color.

[Pat Godwin]

What is that color?

[Chick McGee]

This is peach.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I was gonna say peach.

[Bob]

That's a peach.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, no, no.

[Pat Godwin]

Absolutely apricot.

[Chick McGee]

If it's any shade of this. You guys just want to say titty thing, right?

[Josh Arnold]

That is peach.

[Chick McGee]

Grow up.

[Bob]

I beg your pardon?

[Josh Arnold]

You guys need to grow up. That is clearly pussy. Peach.

[Tom Griswold]

There we go. You know what?

[Bob]

Hang on. Let's hear Josh out. That's Josh Arnold. There's Ace Cosby. Did I say hi, Pat Godwin?

[Tom Griswold]

You did.

[Bob]

I am Chick. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios.

[Tom Griswold]

And you were criticizing the name FDS for some reason.

[Bob]

I just. It just dawned on me that evidently it means feminine Deodorant Spray.

[Josh Arnold]

It's clinical or it's fairly clinical, but, you know. Yeah, they were trying to be gentle. You can tell.

[Bob]

I thought they shouldn't name it in some, you know, flowery way.

[Chick McGee]

The way there are other brands that are named, named.

[Tom Griswold]

Who's a famous French perfume person? Is there. Yeah, I'm Dior for Snatch Snake, the new. I like Snatch from Dior.

[Bob]

What is John Lennon saying in that song? Remember?

[Josh Arnold]

I think it's a Cheech Marin song.

[Bob]

And now you're Calling my name John.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, that one.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. There's a lot of whispering.

[Josh Arnold]

Some of that solo. Lenin. It's either brilliant or just not anything.

[Pat Godwin]

You don't like Working class Zero.

[Bob]

Whatever gets you.

[Josh Arnold]

He was never a working class hero.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I like that. I like that. And you're so crazy. Well, you can't say that.

[Josh Arnold]

He grew up playing guitar and then he got rich. The guy's. He didn't do anything in Liverpool besides that, right? He wasn't like a factory worker.

[Pat Godwin]

On his hands they make you feel small.

[Josh Arnold]

What do you know about it, Lennon?

[Pat Godwin]

By giving you no time Instead of it all.

[Tom Griswold]

That's very good.

[Josh Arnold]

I do like that song.

[Tom Griswold]

But you're all, yeah, you can't.

[Pat Godwin]

There's curses.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, he does. Yeah. No, I do like that. And of course, a writer can write about stations not of their own.

[Chick McGee]

I give you Bruce Springsteen.

[Bob]

He has 38 bathrooms. So this is Christmas.

[Tom Griswold]

I love that.

[Bob]

What have you done?

[Tom Griswold]

No, that's my least favorite Christmas.

[Bob]

It's pretty.

[Josh Arnold]

It's pretty.

[Chick McGee]

I like it.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

So this is Yoko. Please turn off her mic.

[Bob]

You've seen that video, Chuck Berry. Here's Yoko singing.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah.

[Bob]

Get some big eyes.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. I'm sorry. We have to visit the sports page.

[Bob]

Yes, we.

[Tom Griswold]

Because we have revolutionary news in the world of the NFL.

[Bob]

Well, you. You. I think you'll find this first story especially very interesting. The Miami Dolphins are the top ranked team. They're number one. The Vikings are number two. This is for the second consecutive season in the NFL Players association report card.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, does this mean how pleased the players are with the management of the team?

[Bob]

Exactly. Everything about the team, from the food they're eating to how they treat their families, to the parking. Everything. Everything. Falcons are the third, Vegas Raiders fourth, and the Chargers round out the top five. It's the third annual NLPA Report Card released yesterday at the scouting combine, Steelers, Jets, Browns, Patriots and Cardinals were in the bottom five. Would you care to guess who was the bottom ranked team before Snyder sold the team? Yeah, it was Washington. That's right. Let's see. JC Tretter, the NFL PA's chief strategy officer, said 1,695 players responded to their survey. An average of 52 players per team.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Bob]

77% of the union's membership. The report cards compiled between August 26th and November 20th.

[Tom Griswold]

And then when do their parents have to sign them? Do they have till the end of the week before they sign the report cards?

[Bob]

I would imagine. Okay. You think some of the players go home and Go. I lost my report card.

[Tom Griswold]

By the way, parents out there, you'll know this if you're like me and have younger kids. There are no report cards anymore. Except for digital.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, everything's on an app.

[Tom Griswold]

So I went out to our school. I went to get my. One of my kids a. The driver's license.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And they get. Well, you. You have to bring in a report card. Well, there isn't one. I.

[Chick McGee]

You showed on your phone.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. There's this.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Did they accept it?

[Tom Griswold]

No, I had to go get something other form.

[Josh Arnold]

Really?

[Tom Griswold]

Form of idea.

[Bob]

They didn't accept it.

[Tom Griswold]

It was a nightmare.

[Chick McGee]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but the day of having the report card that you signed. Those days are gone. At least where my kids go to school. So.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, you just get a text alert that said the grades are in.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, gotcha. So you see them before your kid does.

[Chick McGee]

Well, they know because all of that stuff is accessible to them, too.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, I don't like that.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah, they. They know what their grade is every second.

[Pat Godwin]

I know.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, I know.

[Pat Godwin]

Jimmy's grades every second.

[Josh Arnold]

I know. I liked when he had to guess how much more work he had to do.

[Chick McGee]

I remember having a bad report card one time. Got off the bus and dropped it down the drain, like, good move. And just said, I. I don't. I didn't get one.

[Josh Arnold]

Can they still change the grades?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, you mean like on a. Written or. No, no, not at all. Yeah.

[Bob]

Remember the. The great days? Would you change a F into a B? Remember that?

[Chick McGee]

That was.

[Bob]

That was the easy one.

[Josh Arnold]

It was F to B is the easiest. Yeah, Yeah, I never did that.

[Bob]

Right.

[Pat Godwin]

You didn't have to.

[Josh Arnold]

No, no, no. I got Fs in high school math.

[Tom Griswold]

That was your weakness.

[Josh Arnold]

And my parents eventually just stopped punishing me. I go, I'm getting Fs. I don't. You can. You can get as mad as me as you want.

[Bob]

Is that what you told us?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Bob]

Yeah, you just were. Matter of fact. Look, nothing you do to me is going to make any difference. I'm just going to fly.

[Tom Griswold]

Unless you can figure out a way to connect porno videos to math, you're here. We're out of luck.

[Josh Arnold]

Let me read another book.

[Bob]

I hated math my freshman year in high school out of five. Five courses. I was flunking four of them. And my dad got the report card and walked into my room and said, this s. Stops now.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Bob]

And the next. I have got all bees. He scared the hell out of me. I was terrified.

[Tom Griswold]

So the NFL has a report card and who are the two winning teams? Miami. And who?

[Bob]

Miami's number one, Vikings. Number two, Falcons. Three, Vegas four, Chargers five.

[Tom Griswold]

And this is, this is how everything the team feels that they're treated by their management and food, etc. That's interesting, right?

[Josh Arnold]

Does it ever equate to wins?

[Tom Griswold]

I was just going to say the same thing.

[Bob]

No. Well, I would think what's the old saying, Winning cures everything. So I would imagine that like Washington was the worst franchise a year ago and now they. They're. I think they're 20th, I think this year or something like that.

[Chick McGee]

Can we issue a report card here?

[Bob]

That's a good idea.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, yeah.

[Bob]

Why don't we have like quarterly reviews?

[Pat Godwin]

I've already been written up too many times.

[Tom Griswold]

I was gonna say.

[Bob]

Yeah, there's only one meeting you have to have.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Pat is the only report card that came with little bottles he has to fill every week.

[Bob]

Hi, Pat. Come in. Thanks for coming in, Pat. Have a seat. You know, you pass. Generally we try not to. To threaten the listeners. Generally you pass.

[Pat Godwin]

But we have bad news. You're pregnant.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, that's the old joke. I was, I was just talking to a friend of mine yesterday about this. A certain famous person that was a Brad Pitt. Had some. No, no, no, no. Now deceased.

[Chick McGee]

Oh yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Was apparently someone I know happened to be in a. AA meeting with this guy. And it's obviously, it's anonymous, so you can't say.

[Bob]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

And apparently this guy would come in and he would, he would say to everybody, hey man, I gotta get some urine. And he would, he would get their clean urine. But the old joke is that, you know, someone did that and the, the counselor came out and said, well, you're. There's no alcohol in your urine, but you're pregnant.

[Chick McGee]

You're perimenopausal.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, that. That's an old.

[Bob]

Do you remember what the problem was for presenting fake urine? The big.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Temperature.

[Bob]

That was a hurdle they had to overcome, the temperature.

[Tom Griswold]

So if you're desperate, I guess you put it in your mouth, swish it around for a couple minutes, then put it in the jar.

[Chick McGee]

No, there's like, there's wraps you can do.

[Pat Godwin]

I have a couple of special.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean some people these days with the ever present. Stanley.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I picked up. I picked up my daughter at school. I am not joking. You know those things we have here where you carry that. Carry six cups of coffee, Those big plastic totes?

[Bob]

Sure, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

She comes out of school yesterday full of Stanley's.

[Chick McGee]

Oh my Gosh.

[Bob]

In that.

[Chick McGee]

In that she had left in her locker.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. And then I went. I went to the lost and found there. It looks like the history of thermoses.

[Chick McGee]

I believe it.

[Tom Griswold]

Those things are everywhere.

[Josh Arnold]

I like to think that she's beating up other kids and taking their stand. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Toughen. Toughen them up. Give it here.

[Bob]

Give it here, babe.

[Tom Griswold]

Now we. That is. The big NFL story is coming up.

[Bob]

That's right where Tom was. We proved Tom is a genius.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, I did just a smart.

[Bob]

No, no, it's.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, that's all coming.

[Bob]

No denying it. I'm certainly also no denying. Prize Picks. Basketball season is gearing up playoff time, and Prize Picks is the best place to cash in on your favorite sports. Over 10 million members and billions of dollars in awarded winnings. Prize Picks has made Daily Fantasy accessible to all. The app's really simple to use. Just pick two or more players across any sport and pick more or less on their projection, and you could win up to a thousand times your money. Don't miss your chance to cash in as the league's best fight for playoff positioning. Join Prize Picks, America's number one daily fantasy sports app, available to everybody in more than 40 states, including California and Texas. Just download the Prize Picks app today and use the code Tom and get $50 in bonus promo funds instantly when you play $5. That's code Tom on prize picks. You get $50. Boom. In bonus promo funds instantly when you play five dollars. Win or lose, you'll get 50 bucks in bonus credit just for playing guaranteed Prize Picks run. Your game must be present in certain states. Visit prizepix.com for registration and details.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much, Chick McGee. Coming up, some interesting NFL news, Comedian Al Jackson and more. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Bob]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. Hello, Jess Hooker.

[Chick McGee]

Hi.

[Bob]

Hello, Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hey, Chick.

[Bob]

Hello, Josh Arnold. Hi.

[Josh Arnold]

This is a. This is a good song.

[Chick McGee]

This is nice.

[Bob]

Heavy on the organ.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, that's the idea.

[Josh Arnold]

You see, I'm a sucker for an organ.

[Chick McGee]

Did you say your organ? 10.

[Tom Griswold]

You're sucking. You're. You're sucking with that.

[Josh Arnold]

I will rephrase that.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah. Better go back to it, but you.

[Josh Arnold]

Know what I mean.

[Bob]

Kyle Jackson stopped by later this morning. There's Ace Cosby. Joke of the day on the way. I'm Chick McGee. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios.

[Josh Arnold]

Chick, do you like zydeco music? No, I love it. But. But I Need to know, is zydeco an instrument or the style of music?

[Bob]

I think it's the style.

[Chick McGee]

It sounds racist.

[Josh Arnold]

It does, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

I don't know why, but it does to me.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, that's. There's.

[Josh Arnold]

I think.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, no, that.

[Bob]

That you zydeco looking mother?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, there's something.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, I. Well, boy, you could say anything there. I don't think that's zydeco. Zydeco's more Cajunes.

[Bob]

It's harmonica and accordion. Right? Isn't it heavy? Accordion.

[Tom Griswold]

There's an artist, Buckwheat.

[Bob]

Zydeco, yeah, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, he specializes in that. I've got to look it up.

[Bob]

He must.

[Tom Griswold]

Does he play zydeco? I remember the name. I thought it was somewhat problem once.

[Josh Arnold]

Problem club?

[Bob]

No. You remember him? He was in Little Rascals. Buckwheat plays zydeco music.

[Tom Griswold]

Great.

[Bob]

And those kids, him and Petey. Pete's still alive. Isn't that interesting?

[Josh Arnold]

What?

[Tom Griswold]

All lies. Could we get some sports out of you over there?

[Bob]

Well, I don't know. Maybe if you squeeze my head. Thank you very much. Let's look at the combine. Oh, Tom, are you watching the combine today? Today the action gears up, Tom.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I got to be there at 2:30 for my tryouts.

[Bob]

Is that what time you have to go?

[Josh Arnold]

Man, I'm nervous. I haven't done a thing today.

[Bob]

From 3 until 8 Eastern Time, defensive linemen and linebackers, they go through their paces, Tom. 40 yard dash, the cone drill, stuff like that.

[Josh Arnold]

There were cones.

[Bob]

We are from France. And then tomorrow from three till nine, defensive backs and tight ends and Saturday, running backs, quarterbacks, wide receivers, that'll be the deep ball and catch that deep ball. And then Monday, offensive lineman parking is free.

[Tom Griswold]

And you. Oh, nice.

[Bob]

You have to go online. You have to go online and take a picture of the QR code to get in Lucas Oil Stadium. And pass rusher Abdul Carter says everybody says he should be the number one pick in this year's draft. However, it was revealed yesterday that Tess came back. Says Carter has a stress reaction in his right foot. He needs surgery.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, no.

[Bob]

That might affect his first pick status. And now it's time for Tom Griswold. Genius.

[Josh Arnold]

Don't you love this little number?

[Bob]

Tom grew up in Shaker Heights, Ohio, or as he says, Shaker. With a mother, a father.

[Tom Griswold]

What does this have to do with anything?

[Bob]

Three brothers.

[Josh Arnold]

He's about to.

[Tom Griswold]

Two brothers.

[Bob]

I'm going to.

[Josh Arnold]

He's celebrating you.

[Bob]

Well, the third one you don't talk about, of course. And Zydeco Zydecogra's wall. That's right.

[Tom Griswold]

Did not look like my dad.

[Bob]

You remember that the NFL is considering changing overtime rules in the regular season to decrease the advantage for teams who win the coin toss. Tom, this is awful. Are you happy now?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, it's because 56% of the time the team that wins the coin toss wins the game.

[Josh Arnold]

It's only 6%.

[Tom Griswold]

No, it's not. It's 50.

[Bob]

50. Yeah, you're right.

[Tom Griswold]

Not 50. 50.

[Bob]

Yeah, you'm right.

[Josh Arnold]

Right. What I'm saying is it's only a 6% difference. Who cares?

[Bob]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

You can't fix that because it's not fair. And in the world of gambling, they're trying to make the game more and more fair because people get very upset when they have a lot of money on the line and a flip of the coin changes.

[Josh Arnold]

Tired of all this talk of fairness? Yeah, I don't care for it.

[Bob]

Life ain't fair, right?

[Josh Arnold]

No, I mean, look, life is wonderful. It really is. It's more fair than it isn't. But my gosh, some of the unfairness can stay.

[Tom Griswold]

So what are they, what are they going to do? I know right now you have. Unless you score, what is it? A touchdown in the first possession. Both teams have to get the ball.

[Bob]

One of the strongest ideas for the NFL, these they're floating them out there, is to have the regular season overtime rules mirror the current postseason overtime with the ability to still end in a tie in the playoffs over time. A 15 minute period where each team has the chance to possess the ball.

[Josh Arnold]

Is anybody awake?

[Pat Godwin]

I'm not laughing.

[Bob]

I'm waiting. I'm waiting.

[Tom Griswold]

This is more exciting than going up the hour to hour roster. What they're doing.

[Bob]

Hang on a second. Here we go. Now there's something to sink his teeth into.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Bob]

The NFL says it plans to use state of the art technology for measurements in 2025. Another instance of Tom being a genius.

[Tom Griswold]

Sending the chain gang out there, it's. That's like a throwback to the 1800s.

[Bob]

Yeah, let's not change anything ever. You're right.

[Tom Griswold]

According to NBC, accuracy is important. And I think in a couple of the playoff games there were some incredibly bad calls.

[Bob]

Why can't we send robots out there and have them play for the players and they, the players could be running the controls.

[Josh Arnold]

Just run a simulation, they don't get hurt.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, that's a good idea.

[Bob]

It'd be like that golf league where they hit balls on the screen.

[Tom Griswold]

You're attempted an analogy according to NBC's Pro Football Talk.

[Bob]

I'm sorry, what was that?

[Tom Griswold]

Your attempt at making an analogy here completely pointless.

[Bob]

Six cameras will be used for virtual line to gain technology. Along with 12 boundary line cameras and 14 Hawkeyes skeletal track cameras. Now's your chance, Hawkeye. Shoot them now. Kimberly Fields from Facts of Life.

[Josh Arnold]

Yep.

[Bob]

Tootie, the NFL senior vice president and oh, do not call her Tuttie.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, she. Yeah, those days are behind her.

[Bob]

She says we use this in background last season. The goal for 25 is to continue to train our techs. Finalizing all of our officiators. Anybody awake? Officiating processes and procedures.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you know that everyone who was part of a chain gang in the NFL was on parole?

[Chick McGee]

Really?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. That was the. The NFL Salute the work release.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

See, I like that. Yeah. A nice work release program.

[Tom Griswold]

Hence the chain.

[Josh Arnold]

It's important.

[Bob]

Yeah, that's a sound.

[Josh Arnold]

You prefer that or the Pretenders Chain Gang.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, That's a great song.

[Josh Arnold]

43 Baby I'm with. I love both but I'm with you chick. That old one is so great.

[Bob]

Chrissy Hind has a 4 size 14 woman shoe.

[Josh Arnold]

Would you choke on her foot?

[Bob]

Big feet.

[Josh Arnold]

No, no, too big.

[Bob]

Too big.

[Tom Griswold]

Would you drown in her fluids?

[Bob]

No, but you might have to throw me a life raft.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Chrissy Hind is very talented. You're right.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah. Oh, brass in pockets.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, you're. You got the drink I made you.

[Tom Griswold]

I was good. I had a really funny joke, but I couldn't laughing so hard at it myself. I lost. Lost it.

[Pat Godwin]

It worked.

[Bob]

There's one of their albums where she has sitting on a bed or laying on a kind of laying on bed playing guitar and her feeder like as big as the album cover.

[Pat Godwin]

That could have been out of perspective.

[Bob]

So it'd have been a perspective.

[Tom Griswold]

So they'll be able to actually track the real forward progress of the ball. Are they going to put a chip in the ball or is it just going to be visual? You know, because they obviously can't see through people to see that chip has.

[Bob]

To be in the ball for make this all work, I believe. Why didn't you look this up in your extensive reporting?

[Tom Griswold]

Because it's. I'm not the sports director. I do my job.

[Bob]

Neither am I.

[Josh Arnold]

Don't you listen to that.

[Tom Griswold]

Chicks shots have been fired.

[Bob]

You know, he wouldn't be happy if he didn't have somebody to pick on. You know a string of train heist. Oh, this is a great story in California.

[Tom Griswold]

I did this for.

[Bob]

You have no. You Somebody else put you up to this. A theft of about $2 million worth of Nike sneakers. According to Los Angeles Times.

[Chick McGee]

The new Jordans.

[Bob]

The thieves boarded freight trains, either waited for a scheduled stop or caused an emergency stop in order to loot the cargo.

[Tom Griswold]

If nothing else, this is like a cowboy movie in the Old West. Butch and Sundance stopping trains to steal sneakers. I pulled this yesterday afternoon and sent it to you because I thought you'd be so excited because they stole almost as many shoes as you have in your closet.

[Bob]

That's not true.

[Tom Griswold]

$2 million worth.

[Bob]

Of the 10 robberies in the past year, investigators say all but one resulted in the theft of Nike sneakers. The Los Angeles Times reports that the crime wave has continued even after the arrest of a man authorities described as the ring leader.

[Tom Griswold]

Seen any pictures of hobos lately?

[Chick McGee]

They got the fresh Nikes.

[Tom Griswold]

They're wearing the Air Jordans. That's right.

[Josh Arnold]

New kicks.

[Bob]

Is there a brand new version? Brand new colorway for the Jordans.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, they're coming out right now.

[Bob]

Is that the deal? Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

It's like the Four. I don't.

[Bob]

Wasn't there a ship that sunk and they had a boatload full of Nikes. Remember this? And there were Nike shoes washing up on shore. Remember?

[Josh Arnold]

It was the SS soul of 78 people perished. You can read all about it in my book. Commercial Shipping and Tragic Disaster.

[Bob]

I believe it started with that boat. Slipped into the water like an old man into a bath. It took three hours to sing. Let's see.

[Tom Griswold]

I think it's just extremely.

[Bob]

Stock is still talking about this after he says, is anybody still awake?

[Tom Griswold]

Twice the fact.

[Bob]

It's a train.

[Tom Griswold]

When is the last time you heard about a train robbery?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. No, they're rare these days.

[Tom Griswold]

It seems so. I just thought it was fascinating. I mean, the great. What are the Great Train Robbery movies? Obviously the Great Train you got. I was gonna say Butch and Sundance.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Throw Mama from the Train.

[Josh Arnold]

That's more of a murder thing. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Robbery.

[Bob]

Taking of Pelham One Two Three.

[Josh Arnold]

Subways. That counts.

[Bob]

That's good.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, do they have a nickname for the.

[Josh Arnold]

Under Siege two Dark Territory.

[Bob]

So it's not the stories, basically, that's boring. It's just my voice. No, no, no. Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Do they have a cool nickname for the shoe thief?

[Bob]

Okay. What?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I don't know. Like.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Public enemy size 12. I don't know. Billy the Sneaker Head. Something the.

[Bob]

That you're just spitballing.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, sorry. Let's move forward here. What have you got?

[Bob]

A man from a small Village in Tanzania is the patriarch of a massive family. 16 wives.

[Tom Griswold]

Whoa.

[Bob]

104 children, 144 grandchildren. In a recent interview. Mz. He's the master of ceremon, and his name is spelled M Z E E. Wow. Mz Ernesto Miyanucci Kapinga. Oh. Kapinga told reporters he began expanding his family at the request of his father. He said each wife has their own house, her own kitchen. There is no competition. 16 wives. Again, everybody knows their place. We farm together, we eat together, we work together. And this is not just a home. It's a system, and it really works. And he says, frankly, I think it's big of me. Well, big of all is what he said. The family reportedly relies on their crops and livestock for food. Well, yeah, they mainly grow corn, beans, cassava, and bananas. And what they don't consume themselves gets traded or sold for other goods.

[Josh Arnold]

Jess, you know a lot about food. What is cassava? Do you know?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, What's.

[Chick McGee]

It is a starchy root vegetable. Vegetable can often be substituted for potatoes.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, so similar to a jicama.

[Bob]

Yeah, it's green. Yeah, it's green in color and has.

[Tom Griswold]

Sounds like a sex move.

[Bob]

A waxy outer coating.

[Tom Griswold]

I gave her the old cassava.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

She won't be. Won't be sitting for a week.

[Bob]

At the peak of his polygamous wife, Kapinga had 20 wives. So he's down four wives. He has some openings. Oh, wives, huh?

[Pat Godwin]

Some more work to do.

[Bob]

And here's. Here's the punchline. Seven of the 16 current wives. Seven of them are sisters.

[Chick McGee]

That's better than what I thought you were gonna.

[Josh Arnold]

Pretty rad. Pretty rad.

[Chick McGee]

I thought you were gonna say underage.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, I wouldn't. I appear that traditional western standards aren't really applied, right?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, no, this goes without saying, Jess.

[Bob]

Oh, and here, Tom, you have seven kids, so don't feel bad. You forget their names most of the time. Mr.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Bob]

How many? Admit he has 104 children. Oh, 144 grandchildren. He did admit that Sometimes he struggles with the name of his children and his grandchildren.

[Tom Griswold]

Of course, after a while, you just run out. Just name him after whatever you see.

[Chick McGee]

Just number them.

[Tom Griswold]

This is my son, coffee cup. This is his sister, felt Pen.

[Bob]

Come here, Cuppy diaper.

[Josh Arnold]

It's got to be tough. Are you click click clack or click click?

[Bob]

Oh, there's blanket. Come here, Blanket. Oh, that is a kid's name. Hang on.

[Tom Griswold]

Have you seen vacuum cleaner? Okay.

[Bob]

Kid sucks. I tell you, this won't take life Serious.

[Tom Griswold]

So is that a world record?

[Bob]

Was it?

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know. I don't think.

[Josh Arnold]

It's just madness.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Okay. Thank you very much. Is that sports?

[Bob]

Good morning, you guys. Today, Josh looks the best he ever has. Please let him know I ever have. Wow.

[Josh Arnold]

Thank you.

[Bob]

My daughter listens to the show and watches it. She says that Josh has never looked more handsome.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, thank you very much.

[Tom Griswold]

Once again, Josh's beard is gone. Now it's just a big mustache. A handlebar mustache, I guess we're calling it.

[Josh Arnold]

Sure.

[Tom Griswold]

Or a Fu Manchu, as they say. And tomorrow it'll just be a. You'll take off the. The. The sides of it.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, no, we're.

[Bob]

We're going to get. Are we going to get the pencil thin tomorrow?

[Josh Arnold]

I'm going to do that Saturday. And so. So there will be pictures, There'll be photos. Yeah.

[Bob]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

I cannot wait to see that.

[Josh Arnold]

That's going to take work. I don't. Why, boy?

[Pat Godwin]

Why did you agree to that?

[Josh Arnold]

Ah, funny.

[Tom Griswold]

It will be funny.

[Chick McGee]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. I'm certainly looking forward to that. Is that sports?

[Bob]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, well, let's. Let's head over to the Silac Insurance news desk. Jess Hooker sitting in for Christy Lee.

[Bob]

Let's saunter on over there.

[Tom Griswold]

What's going on?

[Chick McGee]

A woman went viral on Tick Tock after she shared that she always covers her body in glitter before going on a date.

[Bob]

Ah.

[Chick McGee]

The video shows content creator Delaya Delia Grande wearing a black dress and spraying glitter over her entire body as she gets ready for a date. She says, going on a first date because I'm at the age where they could be married. Married men hate glitter. She wrote on the video.

[Josh Arnold]

That's not all. Men hate glitter.

[Chick McGee]

Well, the thing is, the dating theory goes that if the man is married, he wouldn't try to get intimate with her because it would get all over him and his wife would know he was with another woman.

[Tom Griswold]

You don't want Josh. You wouldn't want to come home if you were a married guy with glitter in your beard.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't want to date a woman who's gonna set traps thinking I might be married.

[Bob]

Yeah, right?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, she is. Baddie red flag. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, I. I kind of think it's weird, too.

[Tom Griswold]

How do you get the glitter to stick on you?

[Chick McGee]

Glitter just as hard. Like, even. Even when you rent houses and Airbnbs and stuff. Now they'll write it in, like, no glare. That's impossible because it's. Yeah, it gets everywhere, and you can't Clean it up.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't like glittery Christmas ornaments.

[Chick McGee]

I don't either.

[Josh Arnold]

Bags.

[Tom Griswold]

Wasn't this a strip club thing?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, it used to be. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Wasn't it a strip club thing? Chick.

[Bob]

What was. What was her quote again? What was her quote in the story again?

[Chick McGee]

Going on a first date because I'm at an age where they could be married. Married men hate glitter.

[Bob]

Married men hate glitter. Why you think that is, Tom? I bet it's a strip club thing.

[Tom Griswold]

Have you been listening to anything? We've already said all those things.

[Bob]

You see? You started it with the strip club. Never mind.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, no. Just asked you a question as though there was some story.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, there's some.

[Josh Arnold]

Right, right.

[Pat Godwin]

Telling us.

[Josh Arnold]

And it's okay if you don't want to share. That's fine.

[Bob]

I've never had glitter on my bodies.

[Josh Arnold]

I. I used. If you went to a strip club. I had a goatee for a long time. There would be glitter in my goatee.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, because that's just. They use it as a shimmer.

[Josh Arnold]

Exactly. Yeah.

[Bob]

Rather than a glitter from her boobies.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes. Why was your mouth.

[Pat Godwin]

Your mouth would be in her. Near her boobs.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh.

[Josh Arnold]

These St. Louis strip clubs were awesome. They would sort of put you in a motorboat type position. Really? Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Were you allowed to motor the boat?

[Josh Arnold]

She would do it. You stayed still and she would go back and forth.

[Bob]

Did you have to sit on your.

[Josh Arnold]

Hands back in the private rooms? Yes, but not when you're at the stage. I typically just stayed at the stage age, huh? Yeah. But they would come out and do that.

[Chick McGee]

Nice.

[Josh Arnold]

Cost you like a dollar. It was awesome.

[Tom Griswold]

You go back, Go back, Go back. Tell your mom. No, no, no. I. I was. I was at Hobby lobby. I'm. I'm gonna work. I'm crafting on a Friday night. Friday night at 2am drunk.

[Bob]

Didn't you have the greatest strip club visit ever at one time?

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, I did have a very. I. I had someone famous. One was fantastic.

[Bob]

Yeah, it's famous. Famous.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. It was with a porn star who was feature dancing at the club. And I got a private dance with.

[Tom Griswold]

Her and no need to go into anymore.

[Josh Arnold]

It was. It was great. It was great.

[Bob]

The transaction completed, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

All right, so this is alleged. Allegedly a viral trend.

[Chick McGee]

I. Yeah. I guess this is something that single women do. And this is how if it. The guy will stay away from her if she has glitter on her and that's what tells her he's married.

[Josh Arnold]

I think that's completely flawed.

[Tom Griswold]

But so is she also willing to do whatever to the guy on the first date.

[Josh Arnold]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

If he's not married.

[Chick McGee]

Exactly. It's really weird. It is.

[Josh Arnold]

It's a flawed. Yeah. Process here.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, good to know.

[Chick McGee]

Another one is leaving a hair tie in the car somewhere. Because I know that's bad, but that's another one that women do. Yeah.

[Bob]

See, we like to think that Jess is cool, but she knows all these tricks.

[Chick McGee]

There's a. There is a viral video out there right now where co workers of men that they don't like will just throw hair ties in their car, go to prison.

[Bob]

No, no kidding.

[Pat Godwin]

Trouble that can cause.

[Tom Griswold]

Explain that slower.

[Chick McGee]

Hair tie. Like a hair tie. If it's not my hair tie, it's not your wife's hair tie. Who the hell hair tie is that? And so.

[Josh Arnold]

So let's say Jess is mad at me one day and I'm married. She could just throw one in my car. And his life is trying to ruin my life.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

You can't explain that.

[Chick McGee]

Or we are diabolical.

[Tom Griswold]

What time is the next meeting? I want to go and see. See what you guys are doing. I had no idea.

[Bob]

What if your significant found another hair tie in your car?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah, he's got three. He's got three daughters at home.

[Tom Griswold]

Every time I clean my car, I find Stanley's and hair ties and crayons and. Yeah, crayons.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

We should come back with more talk of this. Am I wrong?

[Bob]

What about Panties and Panties in the Glove Box?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, what about. All right.

[Tom Griswold]

Panties in the Glove Box sounds like a title of an album.

[Josh Arnold]

It does. Aerosmith. Panties in the Glove.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, that might be a good album for them. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Ace Cosby]

Hey, thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom show this morning. Get a look at today's show on our YouTube channel.

[Bob]

Welcome back to the Bob and Top Show. There's Jess Hooker and Pat Godwin. Josh Arnold, Ace Cosby. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Hello, Tom, how are you?

[Tom Griswold]

Hello, Chick.

[Bob]

Yes, sir.

[Tom Griswold]

A couple quick things. Yesterday at this time, we were saying hello to Edwin McCain. Edwin is a great singer, songwriter. He's gonna be in Skokie, Illinois tonight. Rockford, Illinois, tomorrow, Council Bluffs, Iowa, Saturday and Minneapolis coming up on Sunday. Also out there, Willie G and Tommy Brennan, comedians. They're going to be in Louisville at the Louisville Comedy Club tonight. And then in Columbus, Ohio, at the Leisure Club. Yes, on Friday. As I'm a man of leisure, I.

[Bob]

Feel some leisure Is in order. Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

We'll be performing on the lanai.

[Tom Griswold]

I have on my leisure suit. Those.

[Bob]

I never wore leisure suits. What about you?

[Tom Griswold]

Never.

[Bob]

You didn't have one? No.

[Tom Griswold]

God, no.

[Bob]

Even after Style?

[Chick McGee]

Or was it the. The.

[Tom Griswold]

The material what made it was mostly polyester. Boxy.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Bob]

And most often the collar of the shirt underneath the sport coat would go over the collar.

[Tom Griswold]

The guy from the Six Million Dollar man wore them all the time.

[Chick McGee]

I guess I'm thinking more John Travolta in. What is that?

[Josh Arnold]

Saturday Night Fever.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. They're hideous.

[Josh Arnold]

They're eventually associated with a certain lower class of man, thanks in no small part to Leisure Suit Larry.

[Bob]

Yes. Remember Leisure Suit Larry? Go out and get a hooker.

[Josh Arnold]

It was a game that you would play.

[Bob]

Yeah. And you had to hit what you.

[Josh Arnold]

Had to a computer game.

[Bob]

You had to type in C colon, Larry or something to get it started.

[Josh Arnold]

We would beg. We would go to Babbage's. It was like a computer store. And we would beg my dad to buy a leisure suit Larry.

[Tom Griswold]

And he never.

[Bob]

It was on.

[Chick McGee]

That's like Grand Theft Auto.

[Josh Arnold]

It was kind of like the first Grand Theft Auto. But you would go out and get horrors.

[Bob]

Remember that, Tom? It was on floppy. Remember?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

The leisure suit. I think maybe. Did Herb Tarlock wear them on wkrp maybe?

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, I think so.

[Bob]

He must have.

[Tom Griswold]

It came and went very quickly. Although not as quickly as the Nehru Jack. It.

[Josh Arnold]

Nehru.

[Chick McGee]

I even heard that.

[Bob]

I kind of like that.

[Josh Arnold]

How do you spell it?

[Chick McGee]

NHRU all at once now.

[Tom Griswold]

N E, H, R U. H, R, U. And it was. Johnny Carson famously wore one once, I guess. Is that right?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

It didn't take off.

[Josh Arnold]

Those are wild.

[Tom Griswold]

You'd recognize it immediately.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, it was hideous.

[Bob]

The collar had like a square cut out.

[Josh Arnold]

This one looks like Dr. E. Evil.

[Bob]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

It's in it from India.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, yeah. Actually, it's quite becoming culturally, but yeah, I just. I couldn't pull it off.

[Tom Griswold]

It didn't work over. I haven't seen one. It was one of those Hollywood things for about two weeks.

[Josh Arnold]

And then if you've seen any Bollywood movie, you've seen a neighbor jacket.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, my father wore one.

[Josh Arnold]

Really? Did he look good in it?

[Pat Godwin]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, your father. Your father was a man of the.

[Pat Godwin]

Theater or to a wedding once with. With purple bell bottoms.

[Josh Arnold]

Ah, that's fantastic.

[Pat Godwin]

I'll get a picture. I know you.

[Tom Griswold]

It was. It was associated with those beaded curtains and reefer and black lights. Yeah.

[Bob]

And he fathered hippie Esque. Children, huh?

[Josh Arnold]

Six. I can't believe Carson wore one of these.

[Tom Griswold]

I famously wore one.

[Josh Arnold]

That's amazing.

[Bob]

I think Johnny was the first one to practice merchandising.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Johnny had a line of clothing.

[Bob]

Yeah. Pennies or Sears or. No kidding.

[Tom Griswold]

Johnny Carson stuff. Was a friend of my dad's, was a plaintiff's attorney and he told me once, I think I've mentioned this in the air before, that he would get all of his clothes. He was a white guy, he would get all of his clothes. If he had to be in front of a jury, he would dress like Johnny Carson. And as he said, the African American attorneys would always wear very serious looking suits, dark pinstripe suits. Because he said he could. If he got in front of a jury like that, in that kind of a suit, it would kill him. They would perceive it. There's a difference in perception of the way one. One's cultural background, et cetera, et cetera. I don't know if that applies these days. I'm sure there are a lot of lawyers who get in front of juries that probably are very careful about what they wear.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

But yeah, he always. He loved the Johnny Carson stuff.

[Chick McGee]

I had a big crush on Johnny Carson growing up. Up. Oh, always liked him.

[Bob]

Well, isn't that wild? That is wild. Ed, did you hear?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, you don't read about him, just enjoy him. The way he was great on TV and that was about it.

[Bob]

He could not. He was very uncomfortable around more than.

[Tom Griswold]

Like a couple people, unless they were women.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah, he liked his ladies.

[Tom Griswold]

Got around.

[Bob]

That's right. All right, he had the ding ladies.

[Josh Arnold]

But he might see, I think he would like you and he would show you a memory magic trick.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

You'd probably have a deck of cards and come up to you and. Yeah, yeah, you might actually be charmed by him. Yeah, he wouldn't care to talk to us.

[Bob]

Quite the magician.

[Chick McGee]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, Big fan. As was Cabot. All right.

[Bob]

The cavity came up.

[Josh Arnold]

Magicians.

[Bob]

He sure did.

[Tom Griswold]

Steve Martin.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Doing. Doing magic. Well, it's time for us to. To go over to Jess Hooker sitting over there in place of Christy Lee this week.

[Bob]

Well, when we left you, we were talking about dirty tricks that women play on men. Is that what you were talking about?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, women will put on glitter lotion or glitter spray is what this woman did. Her name is Delia and she's singing on Tick Tock and she's single and she says she's at an age where men could possibly be married and she knows if she wears the glitter, they won't get close to her because then their wives will see the glitter on them.

[Bob]

I remember this story. I went into a strip club and I wasn't attacked by a stripper with glitter on. I was attacked by one of our wonderful listeners who had a T shirt that had glitter all over the front of it. And when I left the strip club, I had glitter from the nose down in my hair.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, man.

[Bob]

On my face, on my Schwarzstucke. It was everywhere.

[Josh Arnold]

Tom got a letter from Jeff. He says, hello, Radio Nincompoops. And Jess, when I was serving in the Army Reserves many years ago, we had one of the girls in our unit donate a pair of panties and we buried them in the bottom of a guy's duffel bag. Needless to say, when he got home, his wife did his laundry. She found them and interrogated him as to whose panties were they. He came in the next month and immediately called us. Sobs.

[Chick McGee]

Wow, that's so mean.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, that's a tough.

[Bob]

Got to be a wife or girlfriend out there cool enough to see that that's a joke and laugh along. Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

But you, I mean, that's trust.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. That's what it is.

[Tom Griswold]

Unfortunately, a lot of that's evil.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, funny, though. I mean, I think barracks pranks are.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Are fair game. Really? Yeah. You know, short of fragging.

[Tom Griswold]

Sure.

[Pat Godwin]

I don't know what that's.

[Bob]

Boy, that's.

[Tom Griswold]

That's shooting your own. Shooting your own.

[Josh Arnold]

It's when it's so. It's like you go to the bathroom and I take a grenade and throw it under the stall.

[Pat Godwin]

That's quite a prank.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Bob]

That's interesting that of all of us, the one the most likely to be fragged would be you. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Coming up, we have a special.

[Bob]

Got Lost Again, A special visitor.

[Tom Griswold]

Plus we'll get a tune out of Mr. Godwin over there. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Ace Cosby]

There's more of the show coming up. Book your next vacation with Christy Lee and King Colette. Visit England, Scotland and Wales this September 28th. Visit bobandtom.com for details. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Tom Griswold]

Etc.

[Bob]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. At the SILAC Insurance news desk, it's Jess Hooker.

[Chick McGee]

Hi.

[Bob]

There's Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hello.

[Bob]

Hello, Josh Arnold.

[Josh Arnold]

Hi, Chick.

[Bob]

There's Ace Cosby. Hey, I'm Chuck McGee. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studio. Hello, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello, Chick Magee.

[Bob]

What's cooking over there?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, we received some letters about marijuana dealers, particularly back in the day when it was all underground. And the penchant, if you will, for them to have exotic pets.

[Bob]

So far we've had an albino skunk. We had an alligator. This morning we had a bobcat, a pot belly pig who would drink and smoke. By the way, three emus. And our latest letter. My late father was an avid listener to your show, and I listen when I have a job that I can. My father was a drug dealer. Preach, brother. He told me about a parrot he had before I was born. It would say things like, want to get high? And stash it under the couch.

[Josh Arnold]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

God, is that funny.

[Bob]

If the parrot saw him prepping it, he would start defecating all over. The parrot, not the father.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you for the clarity.

[Bob]

That's not why he got rid of it, though. He got rid of it because the parrot asked my grandma to get high and she was not hip.

[Tom Griswold]

That is a great.

[Bob]

That is, Ray. My father was a drug dealer, and I'm a bass player.

[Josh Arnold]

That's amazing.

[Bob]

There you go.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow. Now your father was a drug dealer as well?

[Bob]

Yep.

[Tom Griswold]

What was his specialty? You know, the.

[Bob]

The reefer. The.

[Chick McGee]

It was a side hustle. He had a straight job, too.

[Bob]

Yeah, yeah. The rolled cigarettes, things like that.

[Tom Griswold]

Did he ever smoke them in front of you?

[Bob]

Not in front of me, no. I don't remember that smell from my childhood. But he. He would prepare them. He would. He would.

[Tom Griswold]

And he was selling single Lucy's, if you will.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yes.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, that's interesting. Right now I believe we go to the big screen, and there you. Oh, there we go up on the big screen. I see him right now. It's Ed Septic. Good morning, Ed.

[Ed Septic]

That's right, it's Septic. AKA your wife's favorite plumber. Oh, AKA the plumber. Don't give a flush.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you, Ed.

[Ed Septic]

I heard you guys talk about them exotic animals at your drug dealer's house. I. I one time went to buy weed, and the guy had a cat kangaroo. He'd put it in the pouch and he'd hop the drugs right over to you.

[Josh Arnold]

How about that?

[Ed Septic]

You were talking, I heard you say, about the guy had the parrot. I had a friend, same problem. My buddy Joel had an African gray parrot, which, if you're a drug dealer, you do not want to have a parrot. Oh, he got busted. Parrot ratted him out.

[Bob]

Yeah, drugs are under the couch block.

[Ed Septic]

Oh, man, you should have seen that thing on the Stand. Took the oath and everything.

[Bob]

He took the parrot. Took the oath.

[Ed Septic]

That's right. That's right.

[Bob]

I'll be dagger.

[Ed Septic]

My. My dealer's always in his boxers. He ain't got no exotic pets, but every once in a while, I get an accidental view of his feral hog, so to speak. In all my years of buying weed, I have not come across too many exotic animals. What? I have come across a lot of pit bulls.

[Bob]

Oh, yeah.

[Ed Septic]

Apparently, you get a free pit bull puppy when you buy your first QP course here at Septic Plumbing Service and Supply. Drug test all my employees. That way I know who's got the best hookup. Last week, I called Brad, and I was like, brad, you tested positive for speed, weed, uppers, downers, Valium, Vicodin, Valtrex, Viagra, MDMA, MDA, DXM2, CB, and IB Proforen.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Ed Septic]

He's like, am I fired? I was like, hell, no. You got the best plug of all my employees. Hook a brother up. All right, I better get going. These toilets ain't gonna snake themselves. Have a good one.

[Tom Griswold]

That septic, remember, he'll bang your. What is it? He'll bang your pipes, but not your wife. Thank you, Ed. It's always a great pleasure. Over there. I see that lady. She's at the Silic Insurance news desk. It's not Christy Lay. Christie's on vacation. I believe she's in Key West.

[Josh Arnold]

Right?

[Tom Griswold]

Right now.

[Josh Arnold]

How about that?

[Tom Griswold]

It's Jess Hooker. Just what's going on over there?

[Chick McGee]

If you're having trouble getting to bed at night, sleep experts say it might have something to do with your diet.

[Josh Arnold]

Is that right?

[Chick McGee]

Dr. Dan Gartenberg, a sleep health advisor for CPAP.com told Fox News Digital that eating chocolate, candy, citrus fruits, or spicy foods before bed can make it difficult for you to get. For your body to get a healthy, helpful sleep.

[Bob]

I like a nice Dove bar and a glass of orange juice.

[Tom Griswold]

Is the chocolate just the caffeine?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, there's. There's caffeine in cocoa from whatever.

[Josh Arnold]

Everything that's on that list. I won't eat past, like, 2pm because it's more of an acid reflux.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, okay. Yeah, a lot of those cause bad dreams for me, so I don't eat those.

[Josh Arnold]

That's been around forever. That spicy food food gives you weird or bad dreams.

[Chick McGee]

Chinese food for me. I don't know if it's the msg, but it's very specific to Chinese.

[Josh Arnold]

Interesting.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I got the same thing with Chinese food.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Bob]

Really?

[Chick McGee]

He said alcohol Caffeinated coffee and tea as well as decaf coffee should all be avoided before bedtime.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, it's the only thing that works sometimes.

[Bob]

Alcohol.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, but you don't get that quality rem.

[Pat Godwin]

I don't care, just knock me out.

[Tom Griswold]

But I mean, who wants a bedtime snack of leafy greens and yogurt, right?

[Chick McGee]

If you want to improve your sleep, decaffeinated teas, fermented foods, cheeses and legumes can help you sleep and relax.

[Josh Arnold]

Interesting.

[Tom Griswold]

I voice on chocolate covered Ambien.

[Josh Arnold]

That seems to help for you.

[Bob]

Yeah. Especially if you have a big meeting coming the next day and you're nervous about it. You'll totally forget it.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Benadryl, anybody here on the magnesium?

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Pat Godwin]

It works, doesn't it?

[Chick McGee]

Magnesium works. And extra sleepy time tea.

[Josh Arnold]

I love the extra sleepy time.

[Bob]

I like the extra sleepy time because it has a little bear, drowsy on the front.

[Josh Arnold]

Very cute bear.

[Bob]

The extra part.

[Josh Arnold]

What's.

[Tom Griswold]

What's in there?

[Bob]

I like.

[Josh Arnold]

There's sleepy time.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

And then there's extra sleepy time.

[Chick McGee]

Extra strength lavender.

[Tom Griswold]

The extra sleepy time. More morphine for your sleeping and dining pleasure.

[Chick McGee]

Valerian root.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

That's where Valium came from.

[Bob]

Have you ever seen on the Internet, every now and then they'll put up cough syrup from the 1900s.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Just insanity.

[Bob]

And it's like morphine.

[Chick McGee]

It is.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Bob]

Codeine. It's nuts.

[Chick McGee]

All the good beans.

[Bob]

Yeah. All the good white powder. Crazy.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you ever do the thing where you took cigarettes and dipped them in paregoric?

[Bob]

No, but I've heard tell of that.

[Pat Godwin]

And I have heard tell of it.

[Chick McGee]

What does that do?

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know if it does. It was in some. It was in some novel I was reading and I thought it sounded like an interesting.

[Bob]

Where do you get. Paragraph. Where did you get paregoric?

[Tom Griswold]

That was an old. Wasn't that a stomach?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, my mom had.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, that was kind of. My mom would.

[Chick McGee]

That was like an upset stomach. You would take that. Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know if that's an opiate or what, but in the novel, the guy keeps dipping cigarettes in paregoric, driving them out and smoking them. Fairly exotic. So the, the larger point about this is you're not supposed to. What is it? No alcohol. Caffeine. That seems obvious.

[Chick McGee]

Or alcohol, caffeine, chocolate, citrus, spicy foods.

[Tom Griswold]

But doesn't the alcohol help you go to sleep?

[Josh Arnold]

It does, but you don't get quality.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, but you're gonna wake up a lot.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, that's what's in nyquil, right? Alcohol.

[Chick McGee]

There's also some other things.

[Pat Godwin]

Who cares about the other?

[Bob]

Can you have alcohol now, Pat?

[Pat Godwin]

I don't drink alcohol now.

[Bob]

Or I mean the nyquil. I meant nyquil. You can.

[Josh Arnold]

I have friends in the program that have taken. That's alcohol. They have taken medicine and went, oh, no. And they've puked it up.

[Bob]

No kidding.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

That's a big no. No.

[Bob]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

What about a red wine enema?

[Josh Arnold]

Is that okay? Because you're not technically drinking it gives it to him.

[Pat Godwin]

That was in private. I'm very lonely.

[Josh Arnold]

Very lonely and horny.

[Bob]

Of all the things we've said, you take exception with the boyfriend giving you an enema. Okay.

[Pat Godwin]

Have you had one? From my boyfriend. We've all heard.

[Bob]

Nobody know. Straw.

[Josh Arnold]

That's going to break the camera. You know, it's always fascinating.

[Bob]

I thought I cornered the market on unreasonable behavior.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, we're all there.

[Bob]

It's.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, no, Remember there was a big thing in the Internet a couple years ago? The coffee enema.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

That's awful.

[Bob]

Didn't that start as.

[Tom Griswold]

Wait a minute. Hold on.

[Chick McGee]

I did it.

[Tom Griswold]

You did a coffee enema multiple times. Decaf or regular?

[Chick McGee]

It only. You'll only do caffeinated one time before. You won't do it again.

[Tom Griswold]

It keeps. Keeps your ass up all night.

[Bob]

It hits you hard.

[Pat Godwin]

Why would you do the decaf, though?

[Chick McGee]

I don't. Because it's. It's the medicinal properties of the coffee bean. It's not the caffeine.

[Josh Arnold]

We can't do it just. We can't lie about it. You and I did try it one day.

[Bob]

You did?

[Josh Arnold]

I. I administered it to you and you went, ah. And I said, what's the matter? Too hot?

[Tom Griswold]

No, Too sweet.

[Bob]

That's right.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, but you guys should be involved.

[Tom Griswold]

Put some Splenda in that thing.

[Josh Arnold]

You.

[Tom Griswold]

You brute.

[Bob]

Didn't the coffee enema start out as like a. A cure for cancer or something?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I think it was kind of.

[Chick McGee]

Like people are trying to flush their system.

[Tom Griswold]

Lel and a bunch of other fake snake oil things that morons do.

[Bob]

Have you ever had a colonic or a high colonic? No, moron. You morons.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, no, no, no. That's taking. Well, I don't know.

[Pat Godwin]

What's a high colonic?

[Bob]

Oh, it's a higher up than a regular.

[Chick McGee]

They hold it up like here and they.

[Tom Griswold]

What are they? I think. I think they put the enema back in the ground and they have people come and stomp on it. So that pretty soon Pretty soon you've got it coming up your throat.

[Bob]

Does your boyfriend do that?

[Pat Godwin]

Not yet.

[Bob]

Well, you gotta tell them what you want.

[Tom Griswold]

I should. I think. I believe. Aren't the coffee enemas technically dangerous?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, they are. They're. I mean, did you go to a.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you go to some kind of a spa to do this?

[Chick McGee]

Nope. Bought a kit, did it at home.

[Tom Griswold]

Dumb question. Temperature wise, is the coffee.

[Chick McGee]

You. You brew the coffee the way you would. And it. And it is a medicinal grade coffee. It's green coffee beans. The beans haven't even been. But do you have to.

[Tom Griswold]

You have to make sure it's not too hot. I mean, literally, you do.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. You have to let it come to room temperature.

[Bob]

I.

[Josh Arnold]

Did you use a funnel?

[Chick McGee]

It's. Yeah. I mean, it's the same principle as any colonic. Like, you've got to hold it up and the water goes in.

[Tom Griswold]

What is the spout like?

[Chick McGee]

It's just the end of a tube.

[Pat Godwin]

Did anyone help you?

[Chick McGee]

No, I was alone.

[Josh Arnold]

You know, I tried the coffee.

[Pat Godwin]

Could have called.

[Josh Arnold]

I tried doing this, but they asked me to leave. Denny's.

[Bob]

I'll have the grand slam of the.

[Pat Godwin]

Rudy Judy, fresh up my booty.

[Bob]

And a pot of coffee and a hoe.

[Tom Griswold]

I want to pick this up because we do have a tribute.

[Bob]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

But first I will remind you that when you want to be safe and secure and private. At your home. At your home. Because you're in the bathroom giving yourself a coffee enema.

[Bob]

That's right.

[Tom Griswold]

You don't want a burglar to come in and catch you.

[Bob]

What the hell?

[Tom Griswold]

Nothing's worse than being robbed and embarrassed.

[Bob]

Peace of mind. That's what you get with SimpliSafe. Every 26 seconds, a burglary takes place in the United States. That's not according to me. That's according to the FBI. Traditional security systems only take action where after someone has already broken in. And that as you. That's too late, man. Simply Safe's active Guard Outdoor Protection helps prevent break ins before they happen. Simply Safe has AI powered cameras backed by live professional monitoring agents that monitor your property and detect suspicious activity. If someone's lurking around or acting suspicious, agents see and talk to them in real time. They can turn on spotlights, even contact the police, all before the perpetrator has a chance to get inside your home. And there's no long term contracts or cancellation fees. Monitoring plans at Simplisafe start affordably at around a dollar a day. SimpliSafe's the 60 day satisfaction guaranteed or your money back. And Simplisafe named best home security system by U.S. news and World Report for five years in a row. Visit Simplisafetom.com today to claim 50% off a new system with a professional monitoring plan. And your first month's free. That's simplisafetom.com. remember, there's no safe like simply safe.

[Tom Griswold]

There's. Look at the Starbucks menu. You can get it right there. I'd like the. I'd like the colon blaster frap with extra whip. Yes, sir. Would you like to use the men's room? No, no, I'll just do it right here in the lobby. Coming up, our coffee enema tribute. And I will point out that we are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Bob]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. Hello, Josh Arnold.

[Josh Arnold]

Hi.

[Bob]

There's Ace Cosby. Hey, Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hey, Chick.

[Bob]

About due for a song over there, bud?

[Tom Griswold]

Ready to go?

[Bob]

Ready to go, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

All right.

[Bob]

Jess Hooker at the Silac Insurance news desk.

[Chick McGee]

Hello.

[Bob]

We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts studio. Thank O'Reilly Auto Parts for all your car care needs. Get the parts and service you need fast from the professional parts people at O'Reilly Auto Parts. Hello, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello, Chick. McGee. Sorry, I'm getting. What do you got? I ran out of stir sticks. Fortunately, I have a. Who's in charge of Oregon cases.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, my God, he's got a hole.

[Chick McGee]

Did not run out. They're not in his area.

[Tom Griswold]

I. I have Josh.

[Chick McGee]

He had to walk to the green room to get them.

[Bob]

I trust you. Go over there and find out how many stir sticks is in that. Look at that.

[Tom Griswold]

That's a thousand.

[Josh Arnold]

A thousand. Wow.

[Bob]

Look at that.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, That's a big. Almost a barrel.

[Tom Griswold]

These are the quality ones.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Because the. The cheap ones I have, you get a splinter. Oh, in my tongue.

[Bob]

No way.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, because see, you take them and you stir your coffee and you go like this.

[Bob]

Yeah, look. Look at that.

[Pat Godwin]

Why would you do that?

[Bob]

Look at that, Pat. How he sucks that straw.

[Tom Griswold]

Because the. Because these are. These are real wood and there's a. Oh, real wood. There's a communion. There's a communion that I have with the earth.

[Josh Arnold]

Ah, yes.

[Chick McGee]

They're compostable.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

I haven't gotten a splinter in my tongue since I got rid of that marionette.

[Pat Godwin]

I enjoyed it.

[Josh Arnold]

Thank you. Yeah, she. I was down with her.

[Chick McGee]

I was a she.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Yeah. She wanted a relationship with all kinds of strings attached.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, Boo.

[Pat Godwin]

That was wonderful.

[Josh Arnold]

I ruined it.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, no, that was lwh. Hanging fruit.

[Josh Arnold]

That's the best, the tastiest fruit.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Bob]

That's the most rye. There were strings attached, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

A genuine boo.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Now we just discovered we had a news story about what you're supposed to eat and not eat before you go to bed. And it's fairly obvious you don't drink coffee, etc. Etc. I. I didn't realize.

[Bob]

What if you're eating another person?

[Chick McGee]

Oh my God.

[Tom Griswold]

More or less. We have. I'm going somewhere here.

[Bob]

Okay, sorry.

[Tom Griswold]

In the course of this, Ms. Jess Hooker announced that she had, in fact, on a couple of occasions, experienced the. The coffee enema. Now, I found this. Apparently Gwyneth Paltrow, the actress who has that organization called goop. Remember this? She's got all kinds of I do good work, tree hugging, moronic things to do. She's the one that was having people buy some kind of herbs and they would steam their vaginas.

[Chick McGee]

Called a yoni steam. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Important to do, ladies.

[Pat Godwin]

It is important.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, I was making a joke.

[Chick McGee]

I did that too. I did all of it.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, not at once, I hope.

[Bob]

You did the. You did the yoni.

[Chick McGee]

Yoni steam? Yeah. You get a yoni stool and you set it up and you sit on it. It looks like an adult sized potty chair. Oh, basically, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

You have to buy a stool.

[Chick McGee]

You don't have to. You can. I didn't. But yeah, you can.

[Tom Griswold]

Then you put like a sterno can underneath.

[Chick McGee]

You don't heat. You don't heat it at the source. You heat it before and then you transport it into like.

[Tom Griswold]

And this is supposed to purify your mommy parts.

[Chick McGee]

It is.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, according to Ars Technica, Gwyneth Paltrow's lifestyle website. Already. I hate it. Do you have a life? No, I have a lifestyle. Well, I. I model it after John Travolta in his disco peak. No, Goop is the name of the organization. They're touting the purported benefits of a $135 coffee enema. They recommend the implant O Rama, a glass bottle with silicone tubes attached, which allows the user to squirt coffee into their rear end.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, they didn't try hard with implant O Rama.

[Tom Griswold]

According to Implantapalooza, according to actual physicians, scientists, coffee enemas have been associated with burns, infections, sepsis, and rectal perforation.

[Josh Arnold]

Yikes.

[Tom Griswold]

This is my favorite quote. This particular physician refers to it as a triumph of ignorance over science. Which, by the way, is that's pretty good is the world we live in. But you did in fact, try the coffee enema.

[Chick McGee]

I did a couple of times, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I'd love to do their commercials. He never asked for a second enema at home. Hey, no, don't fill it to the rim with brim. You'll spill it all over my jeans. But we have a tribute to the coffee enema featuring the Bob and Tom Band and Orchestra. You know, here in Paris and everywhere I go today, people are talking about the latest development in personal hygiene, the coffee enema. And for those of us who practice the alternative lifestyle, there's only one brand of coffee enema. It's called La La Cage of Folgers. Bonjour. I am Maurice Chevaliernes La Cage a Fougeres. Because when you're pooped, nothing perks you up like a coffee enema. I'm a gentleman who lives in gay Paris. I like to stay, stay as fresh as I can be. But when I need a little pick me up, I don't take my coffee from the coffee cup.

[Bob]

Hit it, girls.

[Chick McGee]

And it goes in your damn ear.

[Tom Griswold]

La casual. When it comes to taste, perhaps your tongue cannot tell the difference, but your can can. But you don't need a coffee cup.

[Pat Godwin]

Just grab the bag and bottom bump that. Cause chef was a man who likes.

[Tom Griswold]

His coffee in the. Thank you very much, Maurice Chevalier, one of the classic. If you listen in there, I can remember telling the violin player, we need you to play the. They squeezed that in. That's a quality player. Yeah, that. That player happens to be a symphony orchestra. They don't really get to do stuff that stupid when they're working with the beautiful orchestra.

[Chick McGee]

But it's fun.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, that was silly. But you. I can't believe you did the coffee enema and the steamed vajayjay thing.

[Josh Arnold]

I did positive results for either.

[Chick McGee]

I don't remember any. I mean, outside of honestly being so caffeinated I was physically sick.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, that happened. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

This is from the coffee enema.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I did a lot. I did like yoga teacher training and all this. I did a lot of stuff.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, yoga's legit, but I mean, as.

[Chick McGee]

An exercise lifestyle that I had thought that I was going to be a part of. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

The steamed clam. Did that have any benefits?

[Chick McGee]

No, I don't think so. I don't remember.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you, as you were doing it, did you. Did the. The joke steamed clam go through your mind? It had to.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. I mean, I've worked here, so of course it Did Right.

[Tom Griswold]

I, I, I chick. I resent that.

[Bob]

You know there have seen clams in the fro case.

[Chick McGee]

They do. Yeah. Linguine and cl.

[Tom Griswold]

With respect to food, I am not a clam eater.

[Chick McGee]

Is that right?

[Tom Griswold]

Do not eat oysters. I don't eat.

[Bob]

Well, I don't, I don't care either as well.

[Chick McGee]

Clam digger.

[Josh Arnold]

I love them.

[Tom Griswold]

To me, clam diggers are pants.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

When I was a kid, clam diggers were pants that went just below your knee.

[Josh Arnold]

Which makes sense because you would get into a little bit of water and.

[Bob]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

You're digging.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, thank you.

[Bob]

Remember Digham, the guy who Sugar Smacks. Sugar Smacks?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I love sugar frogs.

[Bob]

Remember that?

[Josh Arnold]

I think he wore a red cap.

[Bob]

Did he? I think he was a cartoon. Cartoon mascot for Sugar Smack cereal. Dig him.

[Tom Griswold]

Didn't someone do some kind of retirement home for serial mascots that have been retired?

[Chick McGee]

I don't know. Maybe.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, that'd be a great Pixar movie.

[Bob]

I'd like to see Captain Crunch with his feet up. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Retired mascot. We have Jess Hooker sitting in for Christy Lee Christie I believe is in Key west.

[Bob]

But that's going well right now.

[Tom Griswold]

While trying to. While trying to research the Coffee enemy, I came upon this from the Verge. Japan.

[Bob]

Oh, the verge. This is where you almost get to the end of the article.

[Tom Griswold]

No, for porn movies that cut off. Just never mind. Japan has a mascot for about everything. Apparently the new one is Kanchan. K A N C H A N. Kanchan.

[Bob]

Why are you saying it like that?

[Pat Godwin]

Stop saying it.

[Tom Griswold]

Can. That's how you pronounce it.

[Bob]

That's not. No, it's, it's can not.

[Josh Arnold]

Kanchan Number one son of what is.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm trying to give it a little bit of spice. Don't. Well, in any event, who is can? It's from a Tokyo based pharmaceutical company called wow.

[Bob]

Oh God. Now he wants to do it with this word.

[Tom Griswold]

I'll, I'll do it. I'll, I'll do it in a very western manner.

[Pat Godwin]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

Itchy Jaiku.

[Josh Arnold]

Itchy Jaiku.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, Ich, what did you do there?

[Bob]

We got high. Ichiku Park.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yes. Great song.

[Bob]

Oh, it's a great song.

[Tom Griswold]

Ichiku Park. Dig that up, Jason. Oh, he's quit. Okay, good.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

From the Itchy. Wow. Itchy Jaiku. I believe it's pronounced the Itchy Jaiku Pharmaceutical Corporation. It's a mascot representing their line of enemas.

[Bob]

Oh.

[Josh Arnold]

Now does he look like a bag or a Poop.

[Tom Griswold]

It just says. Let's see.

[Bob]

I'm just.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm reading this for the first time. Can. Chan gets her name from the Japanese word for enema.

[Bob]

He can't help it.

[Tom Griswold]

Can show.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

And her character was created after an online competition.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

To create a new mascot for the company. I'm trying to see if there's a photograph. Yeah. So that I. If you're in Japan, meet Ken Chan. It's a little. Yeah. I don't know. I'm trying to see what the thing. This thing looks like.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes. It looks like a bottle of. It looks like.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh my God. That's hilarious.

[Josh Arnold]

Pink sort of bottle looking.

[Bob]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Creature. But it's got legs. It's. It's a guy in a g. An enema bottle.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. It's like a penguin with a bottle head.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

A long neck penguin.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, that's so funny. And carrying a. A fanny pack in the one I have over here.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

So. And it says the. That was the one that won the competition. The in. In. The runner up was Ass Cannon.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes. Now ask Canon.

[Tom Griswold]

Didn't quite make it to ask Canon. No.

[Bob]

Hey. Hey, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, Jim.

[Bob]

My wife and I, this letter begins. Are as you described, Tom. Moronic idiots. Coffee enemas actually do stimulate the liver. My wife does this almost daily because it relieves her headaches and helps her detox.

[Tom Griswold]

That's fine. I meant when you think you're going to cure cancer with it like my. My college roommate sister.

[Bob]

That's fine.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, but don't you want that stuff.

[Tom Griswold]

By the way she did to work.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, okay.

[Tom Griswold]

She be dead.

[Bob]

Is that right?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. She was offered medical treatment, decided she would do laetril and coffee enemas. But hey, you can go out any way you want. It's okay with me. I just.

[Bob]

I just. As long as you go.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I just asked a doctor. No, no, that's not going to work. Yeah. It may relieve stress, certainly. And what a ritual that is.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, that's. That's a lot to do every day.

[Bob]

That sounds like a. Yeah. A lot of preparation. A lot of time.

[Chick McGee]

Must really suffer.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. I wonder if she has a coffee mug that says don't talk to me until I've had my coffee enema.

[Chick McGee]

That's funny.

[Josh Arnold]

Those are all over the place.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, I want that coffee mug now.

[Tom Griswold]

If that is in house. No, but that would be great.

[Bob]

Do you ever try to pour a mug of coffee down a sloppy. A pinhole?

[Tom Griswold]

So I have a. I do have a technical question about this, I've never given myself an enema. Do you. Do you have to stomp on the bag to get it to go up in there, or do you hold in.

[Josh Arnold]

Your hands and squeeze it?

[Bob]

Tom?

[Chick McGee]

No, it's the. You use gravity.

[Bob]

Can I.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay, so that just takes care of all of us.

[Tom Griswold]

Are you on the ground, spread eagle with your feet up in the air?

[Chick McGee]

Spread eagle. You're usually in the fetal position.

[Bob]

Can we talk like adults for a second? Second.

[Tom Griswold]

First of all, I hate doing that.

[Bob]

The number one enema is fleece Fleet.

[Tom Griswold]

I've seen the commercials.

[Bob]

They are the workhorse of the industry. And it comes with a little bulb.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Bob]

And you. You insert the tip. That is amazingly soft, pliable. And it goes right up in there. Then you squeeze the bulb.

[Tom Griswold]

What a name, though.

[Bob]

A long time ago.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Fleet.

[Tom Griswold]

It sounds like there's a lot of them and they're quick.

[Bob]

Fleet of Fleet enemies.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, yeah. Fleet of foot.

[Bob]

Write a song about that, Pat. Fleet. Fleet enemas.

[Josh Arnold]

Now, to get the. Do you just push the liquid out or do you have to have somebody siphon it like you're stealing gas?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, no, a fair question, actually.

[Bob]

See, how long was that? 35 seconds. We talk like adults.

[Tom Griswold]

That's no fun.

[Bob]

And no, you're supposed to try to hold it in there as long as you can.

[Josh Arnold]

Wow.

[Bob]

Because your body will expel it.

[Josh Arnold]

It wants it out.

[Bob]

It wants it out.

[Josh Arnold]

Interesting.

[Tom Griswold]

We had a news story a few years ago, I remember this, about a place for quacks that allegedly would read your. The expulsion from the aforementioned process.

[Chick McGee]

Okay. Yeah. Oh, yeah. And it would. It would run across the screen, it would show you everything that was coming.

[Tom Griswold]

Out, and then they would. Yeah, but it was kind of. But as I understand it, it was kind of like a tarot card reading.

[Bob]

Wow.

[Josh Arnold]

Like reading.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah. You know, as the.

[Chick McGee]

There's that parasite liquefied.

[Tom Griswold]

If Affluent goes by, oh, you're going to meet someone, and there are chumps.

[Bob]

And stuff that go through there.

[Tom Griswold]

That's amazing.

[Bob]

Most of us do have impacted, you know.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh. They say people back there like John Wayne when they did an autopsy or something, he had like 30 pounds of impact.

[Bob]

Elvis. Elvis. I always heard 16 pounds.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Bob]

And what do you got?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Bob]

Oh, no, the do.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

You thought John Wayne walked that way just from years on the horse.

[Tom Griswold]

Pretty much. That's pretty much puts a cap on everything. I appreciate. That's an excellent joke.

[Bob]

Let me tell you about Raycon Everyday earbuds. Tom, please do Raycon's Everyday earbuds. Your perfect partner for the gym. Maybe you're going to work. You need some earbuds or phone calls. Offering premium audio from Raycon that goes where you go. And their latest model is better than ever with a 32 hour battery life and multi point connectivity that lets you pair with two devices at once. And Raycon has a quick charge function. Just 10 minutes of charging, you get 90 minutes of battery. And Raycon has active noise cancellation starting at just half the price of other premium audio brands. And Raycons come in every conceivable color like royal blue, blush, violet, forescreen, and also discontinued collector colors like rose gold. And if you don't love your Raycons, they have a 30 day happiness guarantee return policy. So go to buyraycon.com tom and get up to 20% off site wide. You'll get up to 20% off everything on Raycon's website, including 20% off all headphones too. Go to buyraycon.com Tom that's buyraycon.com Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

There we go. Okay, so. I'm so sorry. Coming up, we have a coda to our recent hunk. Oh Enema. Including the steaming of the mommy parts. I found even more interesting information about that. Do you, by the way, do you still have the chair that you bought for that purpose?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I didn't buy the chair. I bought like a, a thing that you could just sit on a, a, on a chair that you already have.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

You still have it?

[Chick McGee]

No, I don't.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Did you sell it on Facebook?

[Chick McGee]

I did. I made a lot of money.

[Tom Griswold]

He gently used. What's it called again?

[Chick McGee]

A yoni stool.

[Tom Griswold]

Gently used yoni stool. Isn't there a artist named Yoni?

[Pat Godwin]

Yanni.

[Chick McGee]

Yanni.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, okay. Because I imagine he'd be a real fan that wants to buy one of Yanni's stools. I love your music. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Ace Cosby]

You could win a $250Amazon gift card by taking our annual listener survey. We'd like to know what you like. Just go to bobandtom.com survey this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Tom Griswold]

Comedy show.

[Bob]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. There's Ace Cosby. He's all ready and raring to go for that joke of the day.

[Tom Griswold]

And we're gonna need that because we're gonna need a palate cleanser after I read you this next story.

[Bob]

There's Josh Arnold. Hi, Jess Hooker. There's Pat Godwin.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello.

[Bob]

I'M Chick. Hello, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello, Chick. We were speaking with our. Our sub, if you will. The substitute news announcer today is Jess Hooker. She's sitting in for Christy Lee at the Silac Insurance news desk and she revealed that she had gotten into some of the alternative health.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

If you will. Lunatic fringe. I don't know what the word I'm looking for is. You did the coffee enemas?

[Chick McGee]

I did.

[Tom Griswold]

And the steaming of the vagina. Okay. I don't know who this is.

[Bob]

The steaming of the vagina.

[Tom Griswold]

Who is actress Busy Phillips.

[Josh Arnold]

She was on Freaks and Geeks and Cougar Town.

[Chick McGee]

Her parents are.

[Pat Godwin]

And Mrs. Phillips, isn't it?

[Bob]

John Phillips and Michelle Phillips.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Right. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Their daughter Busy's been busy with her cooter, it looks like.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, what did she do?

[Tom Griswold]

She revealed on her Instagram stories that she, quote, steamed her vagina.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh.

[Tom Griswold]

She tried it and had a chamomile tea enema.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, okay.

[Bob]

Huh.

[Tom Griswold]

And she says it worked.

[Bob]

That seems delightful.

[Josh Arnold]

Worked in what way, I wonder?

[Tom Griswold]

Her. She said that while two people poured hot oil on her body and massaged her, she was. That sounds meditating and falling asleep and seeing things.

[Josh Arnold]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

She says, quote, this is Busy Phillips. She said, I saw tigers.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Huh.

[Tom Griswold]

Then she had a ginger foot bath. And what you described, Jess, a so called vagina. Is it pronounced Yoni or Yanni?

[Chick McGee]

Yoni.

[Tom Griswold]

A. A vaginal yoni. Steam.

[Josh Arnold]

How about that?

[Tom Griswold]

And a chamomile tea enema. I guess you don't want to go with Lipton.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, chamomile is a calming effect. Very calming.

[Tom Griswold]

Lipton makes a fine smell.

[Josh Arnold]

Lipton is fine.

[Bob]

Cannon Meal or Cam.

[Tom Griswold]

There's a name in there. Yeah, yeah, it's actually there. It's Camo. Camomile. Chamomile tea. Yeah. The actress said she is feeling clear that it cleared her sinus.

[Bob]

Wow.

[Josh Arnold]

All right.

[Chick McGee]

I think they put it in the wrong hole.

[Tom Griswold]

Ms. Paltrow was criticized by gynecologists for recommending women should steam clean their vaginas. They say that it's ignorant.

[Josh Arnold]

Don't they kind of get steam cleaned in showers? You know, there's.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, there's some steam in there.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. I mean, it's. I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

How is the purpose to get out the wrinkles?

[Chick McGee]

Huh?

[Josh Arnold]

It really is.

[Bob]

Well, you know.

[Chick McGee]

Well, no, you get the downy release spray for that.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, you spray that up there and that gets rid of the wrinkles and.

[Bob]

There'S not a lot of maintenance that you have to do.

[Chick McGee]

No, your vagina is a self cleaning oven, ladies. You don't need to shove anything up there. And yeah, if, if it takes care of itself. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

So you're not going to do it again?

[Chick McGee]

No, I'm not going to do it again. I'm, I, I'm up for anything once want.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, the fact that you can't remember the benefits tells me.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

That it wasn't all that beneficial to you.

[Chick McGee]

It wasn't. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Right.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Like I said, outside of being caffeinated to the point of vomiting. Yeah, that's, that was the effects of the coffee enema for me.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, that was, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Lastly, in this sphere we have this study involving. This is really interesting. Administering oxygen and I guess let me preface it by saying we had a story a while back about certain people that had a problem with alcohol that would give themselves enemies with alcohol.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

So they could go, they could go to work and it wouldn't be in their breath. Yeah, that's pretty serious. This is a study involving oxygen that was inserted into the rectums of mice.

[Josh Arnold]

Now they're floating around.

[Tom Griswold]

Scientists discovered that the so called intra anal oxygen treatment staved us staved off respiratory failure.

[Chick McGee]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

Really?

[Bob]

Okay, so they could, it fought off respiratory failure. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

So they could breathe through their butts. Apparently.

[Chick McGee]

All right.

[Josh Arnold]

But when they farted they looked like deflating balloons.

[Bob]

And they made that noise too.

[Tom Griswold]

This sounds like something you'd go to a very expensive spa in Aspen for, huh? Well, I'm having my anus oxygenated.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, it's wonderful. Yes, yes.

[Bob]

It was simply much.

[Tom Griswold]

And then do the chamomile tea afterwards.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah, Tiff and I did that last week.

[Bob]

Tiff was into that.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, she loved.

[Tom Griswold]

But she was so witty. She said, I'm gonna blow it out my ass.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh boy, we laughed.

[Tom Griswold]

She did, yes.

[Bob]

Oh, yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Then we had a pizza party. Those sort of things just come to her naturally.

[Bob]

Comedic. Amazing.

[Tom Griswold]

Right now it's time for that palate cleanser you were talking about. And the only way I know to do that is Bring it to me, daddy.

[Josh Arnold]

Bring it.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, Ace CB Here he is with.

[Chick McGee]

His joke of the day.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey, Chick.

[Bob]

Please hold for Chick. Mickey.

[Tom Griswold]

Chick.

[Josh Arnold]

Let's not stretch this out, you know.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello?

[Bob]

Yes, Ace.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey, Chick.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

What kind of birds stick together?

[Bob]

What kind of birds stick together? I don't know, Ace. What kind of birds? Birds. Velcros.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, I liked it. I, I'm, I'm not gonna lie. I, I, I don't like that. I liked it, but I did Velcro Yeah. Yeah.

[Bob]

All right.

[Chick McGee]

The Sleep Number still want to be associated with.

[Bob]

I think they do okay. Absolutely.

[Chick McGee]

Sleep Number sleep better together. Save 40 on new sleep number special edition smart beds for a limited time, exclusively at a Sleep Number store.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much, Ms. Hooker.

[Bob]

Once again, Sleep Number still fingers crossed and hopeful.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, thank you very much. Yes, sir, we are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Ace Cosby]

Thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom show this morning. Catch any part of the show you missed later today on our YouTube channel.

[Bob]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. Jess Hooker at the Silac Insurance news desk. Hi, there's Pat. Guys Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hey, Chick.

[Bob]

Josh Arnold is here.

[Josh Arnold]

Trickster.

[Bob]

There's Ace Cosby. I'm Chick mcgee. We're in the o'reilly Auto Parts Studios. Hello, Tom, how are you?

[Tom Griswold]

Hello, Chick week. I'm doing great and I think we're gonna get the satellite hookup going and.

[Josh Arnold]

Let me plug it in here. There you go.

[Tom Griswold]

There we go.

[Bob]

There he is.

[Tom Griswold]

We're hooking up with comedian Al Jackson, who is arriving from Denver, Colorado. Al, you look very comfortable. What are you sitting on?

[Al Jackson]

I have an orange. I went to this place called Swedish Furniture early when I moved to Denver, and I found these two random chairs. This is like an orange chair. It's. I don't know, it's like you gutted the Syracuse orangeman logo and then just like, now I can sit on it.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, that's comfortable. That shouts. It looks strange on say.

[Al Jackson]

Tom, I want to get this out on the table because we're family. And I think the best family arguments happen in front of the public, like at weddings and such. So I'll just say I heard that my brother, my Cameroonian brother, Chick Magee has an issue. He's accusing me of lifting some bags of peanut butter filled pretzels.

[Bob]

Not just any peanut butter. No, no, not just any peanut butter filled Reese's Peanut Butter cup filled pretzels nuggets. And you said, you came over to me and you said, hey, can I have a bag of those? And I said, yeah, sure. And you took two. You took 50% more than you. Than you asked me for, for starters.

[Al Jackson]

That is true.

[Tom Griswold]

No. You know, he took 100.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, he did.

[Bob]

Oh, 100 more. Yeah.

[Al Jackson]

Allow me to defend myself.

[Bob]

I wish you would. Please.

[Al Jackson]

When I went into. First of all, I need the audience to know that, like, it's not like he had three bags and I took 66 of them. He had a. But, you know, like When a box is for resale. So the box doesn't have any frills on it. It's just a brown box. It's packed with product.

[Bob]

Right.

[Al Jackson]

That's what Chick had. He might. It should have been dropped from a crate from a US Aid helicopter. That's how much pretzels that he had. I was trying to make sure that Chick didn't have to carry too much. I was like, let me take two bags.

[Bob]

All right.

[Al Jackson]

So my boy doesn't hurt himself getting back to his room with all these delicious snacks. I tried to step up for my friend, and I was attacked for it.

[Bob]

That makes. That makes sense. Yeah, I. When you took two, I only had four bags left, so.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. A quarter of your product.

[Bob]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

How you learn when, when, when listeners or companies or different establishments bring treats for the show. They're not for anyone but Chick.

[Bob]

Yeah, I, I, he doesn't share. This comes from my only child background. It's tough being an only Al. It's tough.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah.

[Al Jackson]

You're like the honey badger. You take what you want.

[Bob]

That's right.

[Tom Griswold]

Love it.

[Bob]

Me and Tyron, Al, we had a.

[Tom Griswold]

Great time in Iowa. Thanks for coming.

[Al Jackson]

I had. I've been talking about that, that show. Tyler, just really quickly, because I just want to shout out Jason and Eddie and all those guys that got me together, because when I got there for soundcheck, I need everybody. When somebody gets up and accepts a Grammy and they say, I want to thank my sound engineer, and everybody's like, who is that? We don't care. You have to understand, these people make everything work. And when I got there, I didn't know if my equipment, which was brand new, I had never used, would work. And they got me together. Every. People showed up at 4am to hear us goofballs talk. And that meant so much. I couldn't believe that people did that. That was like. That was, like, really a career highlight, man. And I just love talking to y'all. I've never felt so comfortable around a group of people except for chicks.

[Tom Griswold]

And thanks for the. The DJ work. You had some nice interstitial music.

[Bob]

And what was he on? What was he on, Tom? What was Al running?

[Tom Griswold]

He was on the twos and threes.

[Bob]

Ones and twos messed that up.

[Tom Griswold]

It's easy on the ones and twos.

[Josh Arnold]

Sorry.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah. That was some cool stuff. So thank you. Thank you, Al. By the way, Al, we don't have the final figure in, but we apparently raised more than $9,000 right on site with Those T shirts for the Stead Family Children's Hospital. And then I just found out that that'll be added to with the ones we sold online. So wonderful. A big, big success. Thanks to all the great folks in Iowa. We certainly had a good time. Now, Al, the point of this exercise with you every week is to help me get hipper, especially in the world of. Of words. Yes. Before we get to your end of it, I wanted to mention the Lake Superior State University released their list of of words they'd like to see banned or phrases that are just too much. One of them I've been whining about for years, and that is the use of the word dropped, as in, oh, their new album is dropping next week. That's because everyone says that now, like they're hip or something or they're in the record business.

[Al Jackson]

I want us to use dropped only if it's a surprise album drop. That's the only thing that's kind of cool when somebody. I do like when things come out and they don't leak. Beyonce will surprise album drop. I'm sure there's rappers that surprise album drop. But anything else, if it's announced and then the record comes out, it was released. It wasn't dropped.

[Tom Griswold]

How about this one? Do you know what this means? All caps, letters, as follows. I, Y, K. Y, K. Oh, yeah.

[Al Jackson]

I know. Wait, is it. I know, I know, I know you know.

[Tom Griswold]

I know More or less.

[Josh Arnold]

It's if.

[Tom Griswold]

If you know, you know. I don't.

[Bob]

You know, you know.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. So if I. I wouldn't have known that. If someone typed that. I think that they dropped their phone or something.

[Josh Arnold]

I think that's kind of a fun hashtag.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Al Jackson]

Yeah, I like that one.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Al Jackson]

Tom, I actually have one of those for you.

[Josh Arnold]

Really quick.

[Tom Griswold]

Go ahead.

[Al Jackson]

I want to hear your list. What is. What if Josh texted you in all caps, I, C, S, Y. This is actually what kids send each other.

[Tom Griswold]

I can see you.

[Bob]

I see S.1.

[Tom Griswold]

That's close.

[Al Jackson]

Take the. The S isn't right. And let's just say it. Think about it. It would not be pleasant.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I can't stand you.

[Bob]

Oh, this is.

[Al Jackson]

This is why when viewers go, why do you keep doing this with Tom? Yeah, it's because, Chick, we. Sometimes he'll have a horrible. He'll go over 46. We send him to the minors and we're like, that's the last we're going to see this kid Tom. And then he hits a walk off homer in the bottom of the Ninth. And you gotta bring him back, Tom.

[Josh Arnold]

That's why every now and again, the chimpanzee pulls the paintbrush out of his ass and makes it a pretty stroke.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you. Why would you say that to someone?

[Chick McGee]

You don't say it. Seriously, it's not literal. It says in like, if. If Josh told me, like, a joke that was kind of like a dad joke. A dad joke. I'd look at. I go, I can't stand you.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

I actually say that to a lot of you all the time. Except I go, I hate you.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Jess will say, shut up, Pat. And it means. It means that.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, yeah. He'll say something ridiculous.

[Bob]

I don't know.

[Chick McGee]

Shut up, Pat.

[Bob]

I don't know if this is still out there, but do you remember pos when you're texting someone?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Ed Septic]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

Point of sale.

[Chick McGee]

Yes, exactly.

[Josh Arnold]

Parent.

[Bob]

Parent over shoulder. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Chick McGee]

Not piece of.

[Tom Griswold]

Neither you nor I can do that much. No, it's been quite a while.

[Bob]

My parents over my shoulder. I'm at the graveyard.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, you're at the graveyard standing on your head.

[Bob]

Yeah. And I'm at the grave telling them about how Al took all my Reese's peanut butter nuggets to know, and then guess what? He did.

[Josh Arnold]

Mommy, you got to vent to the rents.

[Al Jackson]

You could have texted me icsy after that, and that would have made a lot of sense.

[Pat Godwin]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

The thing about texting is we've been saying this for a long time. There's no tone, so there's. There isn't a sarcastic font.

[Bob]

But don't you find yourself. I know I do. I always apply meaning and inflection to text. Psychic yet.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. And then that makes spiral, and we all suffer.

[Bob]

Like, you would text me, something goes, hey, Chuck. Hey, chick, how's it going? And I would hear, hey, chick, how's it going?

[Josh Arnold]

I mean, that's not Tom's fault.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, it's on you.

[Bob]

Wait a minute. Are you saying it's my fault?

[Chick McGee]

Yes, but with a new text update, you can put inflection on certain words or they'll jump out.

[Bob]

Oh, you can make them wiggle and stuff. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Like, if I. If I were to say I hate you, I can make the hate, like, pop bigger.

[Bob]

It's the Italian that we've talked about.

[Al Jackson]

Jess, to your point yesterday, and it's funny. I will send the screenshot right now, but I got a text message from my ex wife, who I consider one of my very close personal friends, and it just said, I'm done. Yesterday. And she sent it with the thing where it drops and then like, like, almost like a wave ripples from the I to the end of the E and it just keeps going. And I'm just like, that is not a good te get from your ex. I'm like, I didn't even. I was just sitting on the couch. I was like, every man, like, what did I do?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Al Jackson]

And then I responded. I was like, hey, what's up? And then it was just some go. Some gobbledygook. And I text her, is this Ford, my son. My. My 11 year old son on the spectrum who just gets her phone and texts me random stuff? And she goes, no, I just got out of surgery and I'm recovering and I think I sent the wrong message. She meant to send something else to her husband and just sent me like. I was just like, I'm in trouble, I'm going back to court.

[Chick McGee]

If a woman sends you a text that just says, I'm done, that could be interpreted lots of ways.

[Al Jackson]

I just, my heart stopped. I was like, I didn't do. I was like, I'm just sitting here.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm not doing it.

[Al Jackson]

So, yes, you can give inflection. Now. I would like credit because I feel like 10 years ago I came up with the idea for Uber and Lyft to offer the, the ability to put on the app that you would not like to talk.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah.

[Al Jackson]

And I really, I think, because I used to be going to auditions in LA and I would be, you know, sometimes you get the audition, you get the papers an hour and a half before you have to audition. So you're going over your lines to be the muffler king or whatever, and now you're in the car and the guy's like, so what do you think about this traffic? And you're like, sir, not now. I'm sorry, I cannot do this, this. And I think it's just better without having to have that weirdness of your fake earbuds to just be like, hey, you know, no, shade, I love you, I'm going to tip. But like, I can't really talk right now.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I love talking to my Uber guys. Find out where they're from, their feedback. Yeah, it's always fun. I invented my own texting code.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, really?

[Bob]

Is that right?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, See if you can figure out what this means, Al. I'll put bw. Say you text me about something and I write back bw, all caps.

[Al Jackson]

Beautiful world.

[Tom Griswold]

No, it stands for Bill Withers and it means. And I know I know, I know, I know, I know. Or you could. Do I kick that?

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Al Jackson]

I love that because I don't know if I text that, but I could just be like, you know, al, how'd you feel after Chick kept telling you about his bags of pretzels? And, you know, I would have just been like, look, man, I appreciate what you're saying, but I was at that point, I was Bill Withers with it. You know, it could, like, be its own, like. I love that, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Maybe I should, as Bill Withers would say. I k. I k. I'll get this. I'm done. Hey, we're out of time. I can't believe it. Al Jackson.

[Al Jackson]

I love my people.

[Tom Griswold]

Find Al Jackson on social media. Thanks again. Alone. I got to send you one of our posters. And, oh, yes, I knew you probably didn't get one. And we signed a ton of them. People loved them. It was fun. We had a great time.

[Al Jackson]

Absolutely would like one. Thanks again, people in Iowa. I love y'all.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, we'll see you soon. See y'all. Okay, now, we've got some exciting stuff coming up. If you can. Bill Withers it. I know, I know. I love that. Oh, the guy's a genius. Right now, I want to remind you about better health. Better help is a way, as I keep saying, the same thing. It's a great way to access therapy. And especially if you've been kind of on the fence about it or you're a little nervous about it and you think, I'm not sure. I can go into a room with someone I don't know and start talking. But some of the hurdles that may prevent you from accessing a little bit of therapy are gone with better help because the therapy's done online, so you can do it where you are comfortable, when you are comfortable. And the way it works is you go online, you fill out a questionnaire, and there are 30,000 plus credentialed therapists, by the way, with a wide range of specialties that can help you talk through some stuff. Perhaps maybe you've got relationship trouble or family issues or whatever it might be. And once again, 30,000 credentialed therapists, and they're going to try to find one for you. You can change, by the way, at any time for no additional call cost. And incidentally, there are 5 million people that are currently using BetterHelp. So if it's something you've been thinking about, check it out by going to betterhelp.com and I would suggest doing it this way. Go to betterhelp.com btshow Once again, the BTShowpart will knock 10% off your first month. So see what I'm talking about. Especially you've been kind of shy about trying therapy out. This is a very convenient way to try it, by the way. Very flexible. Because the therapy once again, done online. It's like a zoom call or just like a phone call if you don't want a camera going or even texting back and forth with a professional. That's better help. H e l p betterhelp.com btshow we're gonna get back to the Silac Insurance News Desk with that lady wearing the the TP sweater today. Anybody get that one?

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

What does it mean?

[Chick McGee]

You just want me to say titty pink again.

[Tom Griswold]

I do. It's tiddle. You're welcome. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Part Studios and this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Bob]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. Hello, everybody.

[Tom Griswold]

Hi.

[Bob]

Jess is here and Josh Arnold. Pat Godwin. Hello, ace. I'm Chick McGee. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. And it just broke. Tom. Sweet baby. Jaden Daniels autograph footballs are available on the Washington football website.

[Josh Arnold]

Wow.

[Bob]

Signed A rack is how much they cost? Thousand bucks. Thousand dollars a ball.

[Chick McGee]

How many did you get?

[Bob]

6.

[Josh Arnold]

Not bad.

[Bob]

Not at all. Right. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Bob]

Buy me a football, Tom. Buy me a football.

[Josh Arnold]

No, that's.

[Bob]

Thanks, dear guys. You guys rock. My old pot guy in Michigan. Now we've had been having a running people have been emailing us for some reason.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Dealers and their exotic pets.

[Josh Arnold]

Right.

[Bob]

We had a skunk. We had an alligator. We have now an old pot guy in Michigan Chris says had seven great Danes.

[Josh Arnold]

Wow.

[Bob]

And three booies bovies. B O U V I E S.

[Tom Griswold]

Those are dogs that wore sunglasses like Jackie Kennedy. She was a bouvier.

[Bob]

That's very funny.

[Tom Griswold]

So stupid. I don't know what that dog is.

[Bob]

These dogs, all 10 of them would circle them. I think bovies are like primarily really dark black or brown dogs. And they look like bears.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, they do.

[Bob]

They would be ready to shred me at his given command.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Here you are. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

They look like doodles.

[Tom Griswold]

Bovier de Flandre, it says.

[Bob]

Oh, that's covered with ice cream. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

It's a herding dog from Belgium.

[Bob]

Ah.

[Tom Griswold]

They look like giant very muscular poodles or schnauzers.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah, schnauzer.

[Tom Griswold]

The ones here look scary. They're black with the beady eyes and crop their Ears.

[Bob]

Have you ever had a Great Dane surprise you? Like, not expect to see. See it? And we had an old, old neighborhood. There were three Great Danes.

[Josh Arnold]

And, like, look at those horses.

[Bob]

And he kept them in the backyard. And I would go to make my turn, and those things are just boom. They look like dinosaurs. They really do.

[Josh Arnold]

I think they're gorgeous.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. How many? This guy here.

[Bob]

3. And the yard wasn't that big.

[Tom Griswold]

That's a lot of cleanup.

[Bob]

But, I mean, great. They're so lovable, though.

[Chick McGee]

We had one when we were kids. Brooding artists.

[Tom Griswold]

Probably not for long.

[Pat Godwin]

My dad. My dad.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Bob]

Really? They have hip problems and also.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, they do. I mean, I think they're as handsome as anything, but.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I won't tell you the whole story.

[Bob]

Oh, but did it end with a car?

[Tom Griswold]

It was. It was. It was in a car.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah. I put my money on the Great Dane.

[Tom Griswold]

The essence of the story is.

[Bob]

Especially if it's a Hugo. Right, Tom?

[Tom Griswold]

No, the essence of the story was a Volvo. Oh, this is a friend of mine. How do I tell it without getting too gross?

[Bob]

He.

[Tom Griswold]

His beautiful Great Dane, had. Had died at the vet.

[Bob]

Oh.

[Tom Griswold]

And his wife, who he fortunately shed a couple years after this. His wife. Oh, she was. You look up the.

[Bob]

There's her picture, just a rolling.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. She insisted on. She wanted to bury the dog in their backyard.

[Chick McGee]

Okay. No cremation.

[Josh Arnold]

Like Elvis.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, I should point out, they lived in a neighborhood where this really wasn't the kind of thing you would do.

[Chick McGee]

Gotcha.

[Tom Griswold]

They lived in a beautiful, beautiful home, Right. Backing up to a gorgeous golf course. The larger point here is. So he goes down to pick up the. The deceased Great Dane at the vet, Right. And he has them put it in the back of a Volvo station wagon.

[Chick McGee]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

It's. It's raining really, really hard.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, this is only half the story.

[Tom Griswold]

No. Here we go. Pulls up to a light, A guy walks up, puts a gun to his head. I'm totally serious. Gun to his head. He was. He was carjacked.

[Bob]

What?

[Tom Griswold]

He gets out of the car. You know, just take it.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And these guys drive off with the dead. With the dead that they don't know that there's a dead gray Dane in the back. And I kind of always wondered.

[Chick McGee]

They never recovered the car or anything?

[Tom Griswold]

No.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, my gosh.

[Tom Griswold]

But, I mean, can you imagine? You're. You take it to wherever you take it to strip it or whatever you do with a stolen Volvo station wagon.

[Chick McGee]

And that's what they found.

[Tom Griswold]

Guy opens up the. Opens up the hatch back there. And there's a dead.

[Bob]

That had to be a. Yeah, that's amazing.

[Tom Griswold]

But the moral of the story is he. He dumped her later on and was able to live much happier. Sorry.

[Bob]

You've done a lot of living and a lot of cocktail party talk. What do you. Do you always say if someone says, oh, well, Josh. Josh got a divorce. Do you always say, oh, I'm sorry, Or do you say. I mean, if you don't know anything about the situation, do you say, oh, way to go. I knew you didn't want to be in that.

[Josh Arnold]

I honestly say, oh, how so? If you said, josh got a divorce, it's, oh, how's he doing?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, because they can go, okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah.

[Bob]

Because sometimes it's.

[Chick McGee]

It's, you know, sometimes a congratulations.

[Bob]

A congratulations. Way to go.

[Pat Godwin]

Right?

[Tom Griswold]

You got to be real. You got to be real careful.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Especially. Especially if you say something like, well, I'm glad he got rid of that hag, which. And then they get back together.

[Bob]

Yeah, that's true.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. When the circle.

[Tom Griswold]

I can't imagine doing that. Except I just did a reason.

[Pat Godwin]

We've all done it.

[Bob]

Did you do it to somebody? I could see you doing it. To say, okay, never mind.

[Tom Griswold]

It wasn't an official divorce. But, yeah. Yeah, that'll happen. You got to be very.

[Bob]

In any event, you got to be very careful.

[Tom Griswold]

The thing about this show is we got to learn about a cool dog called a Bouvier de Flandre. Flander. But to put a cap on our enema history, too.

[Bob]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Once again, Ms. Hooker described her adventures in the world of enemas.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

A band. Musical aggregation has been banned.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

From a bar in Houston, Texas, according to this news account, after performing an onstage enema during a fundraiser.

[Josh Arnold]

A fundraiser.

[Tom Griswold]

A fundraiser. Yeah, it was. I don't want to go through the whole thing, but.

[Josh Arnold]

Band we've heard of or not.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no.

[Bob]

On stage Enema.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Save the buttholes.

[Tom Griswold]

It's a very, very complicated story. On stage. Stage.

[Bob]

Dig deep, you can save it.

[Tom Griswold]

They say there was no unfortunate material on stage. The guy, the one guy from the band, we'll call him mc. He said, this is my art. When I get an idea, I don't compromise my idea. I don't care what kind of a benefit it is.

[Bob]

See, Josh, this is right up your alley.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Pat Godwin]

There's a famous punk rocker guy that did that.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, really? Who's that?

[Pat Godwin]

I. I don't remember his name, but there.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, I'm sorry. I thought it was a Setup. I'm sorry.

[Pat Godwin]

Absolutely not.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I remember that guy. I know. He did a great. He did a great cover of the who song Enema's Front.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, it was the Butthole Surfer.

[Pat Godwin]

We'll try it again. I'm going to try it again with a joke.

[Bob]

Remember that? Yeah, yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

There's a famous punk rocker guy who did that.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, is that.

[Josh Arnold]

Who's that?

[Pat Godwin]

Johnny Smells Rotten.

[Bob]

Oh, he had a nickname, his nickname. Deuce. Remember that? Give him the Deuce. Did you listen to the Butthole Surfers, Tom?

[Tom Griswold]

No, I never.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, absolutely.

[Bob]

Yeah. Fan.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm a fan.

[Bob]

Fan. No kidding.

[Tom Griswold]

They did a cover of the ACDC song Duty Deeds done. I think it's time to get off this topic and move over that way because we're at the SILAC news desk with Jess Hooker.

[Chick McGee]

Researchers say adding too many periods in a text message can make them more emotionally intense to the readers.

[Tom Griswold]

And ladies, same thing.

[Josh Arnold]

You're guilty of this, right, Tom?

[Tom Griswold]

Aren't you?

[Josh Arnold]

A bit.

[Pat Godwin]

I'm guilty too.

[Bob]

I do the I love ellipses period.

[Josh Arnold]

It should only be three. That's my issue.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, but what is it?

[Tom Griswold]

Ellipsis.

[Josh Arnold]

Ellipsis.

[Chick McGee]

Ellipses.

[Tom Griswold]

Ellipsis. If you, if you dictate in your phone, if you say ellipsis, it'll put three dots and then, then you go from there. Then you. I put that between phrases to separate ideas.

[Chick McGee]

See, that's how I.

[Josh Arnold]

For people who don't know how to use proper punctuation.

[Chick McGee]

Well, it's I, I get it. I know you were an English major. But it's.

[Bob]

We all know.

[Josh Arnold]

Once, always in English.

[Pat Godwin]

He reads books.

[Chick McGee]

But it, but for me, I'd ask grandma. Grammar Nazis. I need you to. I need you to break from the reading, absorb what I text you, take it in and then move on to the next sentence. That's why I do all of the. Yeah, but you know, Willie, Willie gets on me about it because he said, when you text me like that, I think you're mad at me.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, he doesn't.

[Josh Arnold]

He said that Tom, too.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, he doesn't like it and I.

[Tom Griswold]

Do it all the time.

[Bob]

That's on Willie.

[Josh Arnold]

He's wrong.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, I, I. Because I don't, I don't ever assign any kind of emotion.

[Josh Arnold]

Of course not.

[Tom Griswold]

No, but this says.

[Chick McGee]

It says. Researchers showed.

[Josh Arnold]

That's why I was that Adam.

[Chick McGee]

Researchers showed college students various text message that had different forms of punctuation.

[Josh Arnold]

All right?

[Chick McGee]

Messages that included periods after every word were given higher emotional intensity ratings.

[Bob]

That's so silly.

[Tom Griswold]

After every word.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. If it says go period, F period yourself.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, no, no, that is a good way. That is a creative way to, like. I will sometimes say, oh, oh, period. My goodness.

[Chick McGee]

Right?

[Josh Arnold]

And it's like.

[Chick McGee]

It's shock value. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

It's fun.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. I always put an ellipsis prior to an exclamation point because otherwise it looks like an L.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't.

[Chick McGee]

I can't help you here. I can't help you here, Tom.

[Bob]

That's not the case at all. I don't think so.

[Tom Griswold]

But I don't do the period after each word. All caps, though, is universally understood to mean you're yelling, selling.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

I mean, I think. Or I'm just trying to make a point.

[Bob]

I think so.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Bob]

I think it is universal.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, it is. It is.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. And. But. But I can read it both ways that you're either excited or mad. Like, I have the sense.

[Josh Arnold]

Context really does play a big.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah.

[Bob]

I did not know that that the wiggly and the italics, the different for text was on the phone already.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Did you see it? I sent it to you.

[Tom Griswold]

Italics.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It. Yeah, you can.

[Bob]

You can make certain words pop.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Bob]

That's really a good effect.

[Tom Griswold]

Is that like where the happy birthday and it comes up shooting glitter and.

[Chick McGee]

That kind of thing, but it's just in the text itself and it'll. It'll pop out at you kind of Zuka.

[Tom Griswold]

Can you do it for bad words?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, you can do it for whatever you want.

[Bob]

I'll see. Jesso was very nice. She texted me this earlier. So much talking as. As pops out. Out by you and you're saying nothing and big capital letters.

[Josh Arnold]

Was that a mid show text?

[Bob]

I think it might have a co worker. Yes.

[Pat Godwin]

Yes, it was a part of a group text.

[Chick McGee]

I hate you both so much right.

[Bob]

Now you've got it. I don't know what I did. Oh, wait.

[Josh Arnold]

This is a group text that I'm not on.

[Chick McGee]

You're not on.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, I love when. I love. I love when they're a secret group about you. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Bob]

All right. This one should be about you if you're not in the text.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, it is not.

[Bob]

Oh, so much talking and saying nothing.

[Tom Griswold]

Can you buy. I think. I think you. The answer I think I know is yes. Emojis that aren't on the phone already.

[Chick McGee]

Yes. And in the new update, there is an app on your phone now where you can create using like an AI type program to make your own emojis. I could type in like sad clown and a yamaka and it's gonna make.

[Josh Arnold]

Wow.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, it's gonna.

[Pat Godwin]

That's Jackie Mason.

[Bob]

So depressed. I can't believe it.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, Pat's got his guitar out. That means it's time for some entertainment.

[Pat Godwin]

Hopefully it's got an intro. Promise. The days of no mobile phones for those precious times when you want to be alone. If your girlfriend was mad and you needed some space, you took a drive without a phone and no one's in your face. I told her we'll talk a little later, I gotta take a nap but she's messaging me now and she's texting in all caps, all caps, all caps.

[Bob]

All caps, all caps Gone are the.

[Pat Godwin]

Emojis she's texting in all caps I can delete the text but I dare not block Gotta ride out the storm when her caps are unlock this could be hours, could be days with an Irish temper fueled by chardonnay I'm trying to sleep, here comes more crap. Oh, you know she's mad cuz she's texting in all caps all caps, all caps, all caps, all caps I see the bubbles, I'm in trouble. She's texting in all caps, all caps, all caps. I get it, you're mad. Texting in all caps, all caps, all caps. She's texted in all caps.

[Bob]

There's the door.

[Josh Arnold]

You know what really ruins the flow of an all caps message is if you have to ask a number and then the all caps goes away. I. I infuriates me. I'm not done with all caps. I just wanted to put an eight in there.

[Bob]

Huh. I didn't know it did that.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah, it really, really sticks in my crawl.

[Tom Griswold]

No. Bothers me, huh? Why do you have to hit the uppercase button to put a question mark somewhere?

[Josh Arnold]

I see what you're saying.

[Tom Griswold]

On a regular keyboard, that should be. Why can't be standard. That should be in the regular side.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't need to show shift it.

[Bob]

Why can't the keyboard know the most? What I type the most and have those symbols and letters. We'll get there on the keyboard. Yeah, Because I already know it'll suggest words that I've used.

[Tom Griswold]

So, like, you want to go online and you just hit one button, it goes porn, porn, porn, porn, porn, porn, porn. And then you just get it.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, Eddie put a porn button in his.

[Bob]

That leaves my hand free, you know?

[Pat Godwin]

Bothers me. It bothers me.

[Tom Griswold]

What bothers you?

[Pat Godwin]

Tell us when you Text your ex wife for any reason. There should be an alarm that goes.

[Tom Griswold]

Goes.

[Pat Godwin]

Are you sure you want to send this to your.

[Chick McGee]

There should. There should be a pause button. Yeah, you should have. You should have. You should have a little bit pause.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And there should also be some maybe back in the day pat for you. A some kind of finger surface detection button. Just checks your alcohol level.

[Chick McGee]

I think there's a lot of people that should have a text breathalyzer.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't just live like me and.

[Chick McGee]

Completely look at me and my clean.

[Josh Arnold]

Line control of your emotion.

[Bob]

You guys, let me talk.

[Josh Arnold]

There was clearly a joke coming and you couldn't shut your mouth.

[Tom Griswold]

Let's hear. Don't worry everybody. Everybody calm down. Oh, we just got the double bird.

[Josh Arnold]

You'll get nothing from me.

[Tom Griswold]

This the double wrong.

[Bob]

Ladies and gentlemen, what you just heard is Josh Arnold and his scene coming.

[Pat Godwin]

We didn't know you shut up. You were bl.

[Bob]

I did it yesterday and now they're doing it today.

[Tom Griswold]

Right now it's time to say, hey, what's around the corner? I know a lot. Oh, basketball. Which means let's have some fun.

[Bob]

Wall to wall basketball with prize picks. That's right. Prize picks app. So simple to use. Just pick two or more players across any sport, pick more or less on their projection and you could win up to a thousand times your money. Don't miss your chance to cash in as the league's best fight for playoff positioning. Join prizepix, America's number one daily fantasy sports app, available to play in more than 40 states, including California and Texas. Download the prize picks app today. Use the code tom and get $50 in bonus promo funds instantly when you play $5. That code tom on prize picks to get $50 in bonus promo funds Instantly when you play $5. Win or lose, you'll get 50 bucks in bonus credit just for playing. Guaranteed prize picks run your game. Must be present in certain states. Prizepix.com for restrictions and details.

[Tom Griswold]

Chat testing. Hello. Sorry about that. Thank you very much.

[Bob]

Joss will commit murder.

[Josh Arnold]

And they giggled all through your ad. I mean, it's just. Yeah, we need professionals.

[Bob]

What's happening?

[Tom Griswold]

I do have a real quick update. We were talking about wigs, toupees, wig hats. The wig hat. Where that wig hat on your head. Love that song. Yeah, baby.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

The cockney. A term. I was right. The Irish jig is what? That's the origin of the. Of the phrase wig. He's got an Irish on. Okay, so there you go. Learned a little bit of Something, huh? Now I know that you do. You do that Irish dancing, Pat, where you don't move your arms around Not.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, hell no.

[Tom Griswold]

Isn't that guy touring that Michael Flatley.

[Bob]

Clogging is flatly still alive?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, well, I thought he'd.

[Josh Arnold]

He's still doing flatly at flatlined.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, thank you very much.

[Josh Arnold]

Even he wouldn't let me say it.

[Tom Griswold]

Was that the truth? All right.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, that wasn't the joke.

[Tom Griswold]

We are in the O'Reilly Auto Part Studios about to have a lot more breathing room. Thank God. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Ace Cosby]

Just got to get a hold of us. Call fax, mail or email. Get all the contact information you [e-mail] this is the Bob and Tom show.

[Tom Griswold]

That coming up.

[Bob]

Hey, welcome back to Bob and Tom Show. Josh Arnold, Jess Hooker, Pat Godwin, Ace Cosby. We're all here. Another day in the books.

[Josh Arnold]

Certainly appreciate you all apologizing to me over the commercial break for as I believe Pat, but it's stunting my genius. And you are right. And I thank you again for.

[Tom Griswold]

And I. I recused myself.

[Pat Godwin]

We were wrong. And that's just not wrong.

[Tom Griswold]

Look, I have no idea what day today is, so it's 27.

[Josh Arnold]

April 5th.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Bob]

February 27th. Almost done with February. Tomorrow's last day.

[Chick McGee]

Yep.

[Tom Griswold]

You know that I'm just looking for the first time of today and Right. Pretty quickly, didn't it first time today in history.

[Chick McGee]

The 22nd Amendment was ratified today.

[Bob]

Which one is now the repeal prohibition two terms president.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. We have. You were just singing a little bit of the great song from the movie first time ever I saw your face.

[Bob]

Play misty.

[Tom Griswold]

Just play misty for me. From what movie? Ace just said play Misty for me. Thank you very much much. The the artist Roberta Flack. 1971 sadly just died a couple days ago. Brilliant.

[Bob]

Jessica Flacky. Who was the. The groupie in that?

[Chick McGee]

Tandy. Jessica Tandy.

[Bob]

No. She was in Arrested Development. Lang.

[Pat Godwin]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

No.

[Bob]

No. Dark haired girl.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Lounge.

[Tom Griswold]

But then that's that Jessica Lounge. That Roberta Flack song had been out for a while and it was not a hit. And then it was in that movie and it emerged as a. Obviously it's a great song. Okay, here we go on this date in history. Speaking of music, this is interesting. 1980. The song I will survive.

[Bob]

Oh, I hate this.

[Tom Griswold]

Remember that song? It. It won the first and only Grammy ever awarded in the category best disco recording. Oh, they eliminated the category after one outing.

[Josh Arnold]

1980 seems a little late.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah.

[Bob]

By then was 79 the last year. Studio 54, I want to say about.

[Tom Griswold]

That, but I'm trying to think, when did the Travolta movie Saturday Night Fever came out? What 78 was that? I think so, but I will survive. By anyone. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Cake has a good cover by the way.

[Tom Griswold]

It beat out. It beat out Michael Jackson's Don't Stop Till youl Get a Enough.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, yeah, I like that.

[Tom Griswold]

So. But yeah, that's interesting that they, they bailed on the whole category after, after. After just the one outing.

[Bob]

Well, there's still disco ish songs out there. They just don't call it disco. Right.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but there's that classic disco era that was certainly the late 70s. In 1996, the Happy Madison Productions company was formed by Adam Sandler. And he's got. He's got the new golf movie coming out.

[Josh Arnold]

Gilmore too.

[Bob]

Yeah, I think everybody's back except Bob Barker, of course.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

And Nolsy might be in it.

[Tom Griswold]

Happy birthday. Happy birthday. Going out to John Steinbeck. Your thoughts, Josh?

[Josh Arnold]

I am a quite a fan. I've not read the whole catalog, but don't you guys. Don't you guys like him?

[Tom Griswold]

Of course.

[Josh Arnold]

Mice and Men. Cannery Row is. Cannery Row is my favorite of his.

[Bob]

Canary Row, that movie I was shot. I love that movie.

[Josh Arnold]

I've not seen it.

[Bob]

Oh, it's. It's great.

[Tom Griswold]

Is there a wine company that has the Grapes of Wrath? One would hope.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

It's kind of a spicy dust. Might have a bad reaction. Sorry, sorry. Elizabeth Taylor, born in this date in 1932 as gorgeous a woman as well.

[Bob]

But Richard Burton actually had them. Ultimate compliment.

[Josh Arnold]

We have audio of Richard now. Here we go.

[Tom Griswold]

The most gorgeous woman in the world.

[Josh Arnold]

I love her. I think she's a great actor.

[Tom Griswold]

Remember the famous SNL thing where Belushi.

[Josh Arnold]

I do.

[Tom Griswold]

Was dressed as Elizabeth Taylor eating chicken? Yes.

[Bob]

She gets choked on a he. She chokes on a bone. I guess her eyes were violet.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Josh Arnold]

And those boobs.

[Tom Griswold]

Happy birthday, Chihuahua. Who's that? J W, O W, W. I don't.

[Chick McGee]

Know who that is.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know who.

[Bob]

Oh, Jay. Wow.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, Jay.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Bob]

From Jersey Shore, right? Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I see.

[Josh Arnold]

Sorry, I still don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Anything.

[Bob]

It's Snooki.

[Josh Arnold]

And you watched, you watched that a little bit.

[Bob]

Every single gym, tan, laundry and all that. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

What are they doing now?

[Josh Arnold]

Making money.

[Chick McGee]

They do family reunion every year and they go to the shore again.

[Bob]

Mike, the situation wasn't.

[Tom Griswold]

He. Didn't he go to jail?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, he went to rehab. And now he's sober.

[Tom Griswold]

One of. One of them went to jail.

[Bob]

He went to jail.

[Tom Griswold]

Tax evasion.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

So. Wow. They got to.

[Bob]

Is that right?

[Josh Arnold]

But he's Jersey sore.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. From the.

[Pat Godwin]

Was that the.

[Bob]

And that gets us back to our. Today's. Today's charity. Save that butthole. Save it. You could save it.

[Tom Griswold]

You know something? I think we should.

[Bob]

Oddly, I didn't just. I didn't come up with that.

[Tom Griswold]

How about this one? Dick Nixon. And before Dick issued the Shanghai Communique normalizing relations between China and United States.

[Bob]

I'm watching this great documentary. It covers 19 8. Actually, 1840s when the Russian Revolution and all that up till now. And they have a section on Nixon. Obviously, he was not on the up and up. He was something else, man.

[Tom Griswold]

How about this one, Pat? 1997, Ireland becomes one of the last countries in the world to legalize divorce.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

You don't get divorced in Ireland.

[Tom Griswold]

There are still two countries you were stuck where divorce is illegal. Iran or something like that, The Philippines and Vatican City.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, okay.

[Bob]

Huh. Huh.

[Tom Griswold]

Doesn't that sound like a Vatican City divorce?

[Josh Arnold]

What about Dick Wolf's new show?

[Tom Griswold]

Vatican City divorce? He's a private eye.

[Bob]

What about abortions in Vatican City?

[Chick McGee]

What are you doing, boy?

[Tom Griswold]

I thought we were done, and then.

[Josh Arnold]

No, we're done.

[Tom Griswold]

We're done.

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you.

[Bob]

Might not be able to come back.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Okay. Coming up. Wait a minute. No, we're done. These are the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Ace Cosby]

Thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom show this morning, even though we're not too much to look at. You can also watch the show on our YouTube channel. YouTube personality Betty Johnson has cracked the code on a new era of newsmaking.

[Tom Griswold]

It's got to be music to your ears.

[Al Jackson]

It's like the angels singing.

[Tom Griswold]

Listen, learn and laugh. I had a feeling. I had a feeling you'd be in a very good mood. Oh, this is gonna be a glorious day on Capitol Hill for you, sir.

[Ace Cosby]

It's a new cultural and landscape, so.

[Tom Griswold]

It'S an important moment right now. Does this deserve another look? The Benny show sees it in all of its glory.

[Ace Cosby]

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