Transcript
Tom Griswold (0:00)
ABC, January 8th. Tim Allen and Kat Dennings star in the new family comedy Shifting Gears. Dad, I'm broke and I need a place to stay until I figure out what the rest of my life looks like. So a couple of days. I love it when his daughter moves back in. The last time you walked out that door, you look back at me and gave me a double bird. I was 18. The double bird was how I ended all our conversations. The wheels come off. Can we try to talk to each other like rational adults? Have you watched the news lately? That's not a thing anymore. Series premiere Wednesday, January 8th on ABC and stream on Hulu. It's the Bob and Tom Show. They both make a living in their bare feet Catching one is like a treat and they both hang out right there by the shell they both walk slow to slee triple pace Both afraid to show their face but only one has a built in place to hide Turtles and whores, turtles and whores, I love them. Turtles and whores they both advertise a little tail move so much they never get mail they both go by the same nickname Snapper, Snapper. Daddy never told about the birds and bees but always talked about both these and made it clear only one was fit to eat. Turtles and whores, yeah. Turtles and whores, I love them. Turtles and whores, turtles and hoes. Now if you catch one, here's some advice. One is dirty and the other ain't nice. Stay polite and always walk up from behind. Make small talk. Never let them see fair. Don't work alone, Just bait or bear. And when you're done, just drop them by the river. Turtles and horse, Turtles and horse. I've caught both while fishing. I'm always on a mission. And they both hate the kitchen turtles at home. Good morning. Hello. From coast to coast, it's the Bob and Tom Show. Bob and Tom. Bob and Tom. Bob and Tom. Many portions of the upcoming program have been pre recorded, meaning they've already happened and they're about to happen again. So where was I? Oh. Oh, yeah. Ladies and gentlemen, we're glad to have you here. It's the Bob and Tom Show. Right now we turn to the news desk with Christy Lee. What's going on?
Christy Lee (2:59)
Earlier we had the world record of the longest human hair wig. While a designer firm in Holland is knitting sweaters using human hair.
Tom Griswold (3:08)
We're making a sweet.
Christy Lee (3:09)
You're trying to wigs in hair human material loop. Taking discarded hair from salons, spinning it.
Tom Griswold (3:17)
Into a continuous spread the hair from heads. Sometimes if you use the pubic hair. Oh, really? Sometimes. And then we use the toenails for buttons. Oh, that sounds really awful. We got the idea from Buffalo Bill and Silence of the Lamb. That's. That's not a good source. Source of inspiration. Yeah, he's something else. So they're making.