The BOB & TOM Show - January 13, 2026

Summary

The BOB & TOM Show – January 13, 2026 Episode Summary

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Episode Overview

The January 13, 2026 episode of The BOB & TOM Show delivers its signature blend of comedy, commentary, sports talk, audience emails, musical performances, and observational banter. This episode features house band Duke Tomato & The Tomato Trio (with the Brass to Mouth Horns), lively discussion on NFL playoffs, the quirks of blue jeans’ tiny pockets, viral culture, new dictionary words, and a good dose of self-deprecating and relational humor. Highlights include a special “El Conquistador” phone prank, musical tributes, the ever-popular mailbag segment, and a deep dive into the world of mullets and language trends.

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Key Segments & Timestamps

1. Comedy Phone Bit: "El Conquistador" at the Car Dealership

[00:52 – 03:26]

• The show opens with a classic prank call. "El Conquistador" insists on not being called "sir" but only addressed by full title.
• The salesmen struggle with the insistence, which leads to comedic confusion on both sides.

“It is very important that I only be addressed in that fashion as El Conquistador.” – (E) [01:15]

2. Around the Studio: Introductions & Show Vibe

[03:30 – 05:14]

• Quick check-in around the studio: Christy Lee, Pat Godwin, Josh Arnold, Ace Cosby, Chick McGee, and Tom.
• Tom remarks on a listener who trained Alexa to call him "El Conquistador."
• Early shout-out to in-studio band Duke Tomato Trio.

3. NFL Playoff Wrap-up and Medical Waiting Room Observations

[05:15 – 10:25]

• Chick McGee recaps NFL playoff results, especially the Texans beating the Steelers.
• Banter about bland medical waiting rooms: wiping down vinyl chairs, TVs now replacing magazines, and the lack of Muzak.

"The medical waiting room is different now, no magazines anymore… you gotta wipe off the chairs. You can’t just leave it lay there.” – Christy/Chick [07:00]

4. Blue Jeans’ Tiny Pocket: What’s It For?

[10:25 – 13:42]

• Tom forgets about the tiny fifth pocket on jeans; the cast riffs on various possible uses (guitar picks, drugs, earrings).
• Listener responses sparked by earlier show mention.
• Tom’s complaint about “used Zyn” packets littering his street leads to a conversation about personal street-cleaning tools.

5. Show-and-Tell: Car Talk & Hyundai Palisade Hybrid

[14:28 – 16:31]

• Tom and Christy chat about features of modern SUVs and the unique chores that come with having a third row.
• Briefly segue into a music tease and an announcement about live music from Duke Tomato Trio throughout the show.

6. Emails from Listeners: Hurtful Tom-to-Josh Comments Hall-of-Fame

[19:47 – 21:54]

• A listener ranks their "Top 4 Tom Being a Dick to Josh" moments, including the infamous "more chalk" body outline joke.
• The crew collectively remembers (and laughs at) previous remarks.

“Number one… the all-time comment: ‘more chalk.’” – Listener Robert [21:31]

7. Mailbag Mania: Baby Jeans Pocket Uses & Valentine's Day Advice

[22:09 – 24:58]

• Letters: listeners use the tiny jeans pocket for guitar picks (especially on jam sessions), earrings, or even Zyn packets.
• Early warning for Valentine's Day falling on a Saturday; advice to book reservations early.
• A workplace breastfeeding story spawns the term "boob juicer.”

8. Nova Scotia Duck Tolling Retriever Wins Acting Award

[25:09 – 26:36]

• Recap: a dog won “Best Performance in a Horror Thriller” at the Astro Awards, beating human actors.
• Cast riffs about the "dog upstaging Ethan Hawke" and unusual red carpet events.

9. Language & Aging: Calligraphy, Clocks, and Beards

[26:48 – 28:51]

• Tom rails against calligraphy and Roman numerals, favoring analog clocks. Letter from a listener pokes fun at the contradiction.
• Listener compliments Ace Cosby’s beard; Tom remains anti-beard.

10. Sock Application Arguments & Credence Reference

[28:51 – 29:08]

• Listener brags about never sitting down to put on socks, sparking a brief tangent.
• Quick jab referencing "Stuck in Lodi" (CCR) and guitar pick storage.

11. Wooks & Subcultural Slang

[29:08 – 32:15]

• Discussion of "wooks"—jam-band subculture types often considered untrustworthy or dirty.
• New reality show in production, “Walking/Wooking for Love,” looking for Wooks to participate.
• Letter clarifies the term can be a pejorative, not just fun.

“Wooks are typically untrustworthy, physically dirty, conniving folks in the jam festival scene.” – Letter [30:52]

12. Sports Desk: Playoff Results, Ticket Prices, Viral Kid Rants

[33:00 – 54:51]

• Chick details NFL playoff results, key injuries (Achilles epidemic: Kittle, Rodgers), and controversial plays (“tush push”).
• Viral Eagles fan rants about the team’s loss: wants “A.J. Brown packing his bags” and the offensive coordinator flipping burgers.
• IU-Miami National Championship ticket prices approach $3,000–$20,000.

13. Mullets: The Contest & Cultural Cycle

[55:04 – 57:23]

• 10-year-old wins “Best Mullet” at a Pennsylvania farm show.
• Panel jokes about the “Kentucky waterfall” and mullet culture through the years—Billy Ray Cyrus, Bowie, hockey players, comedian kids.

“He had one curly hair, so it just looked like a bowl of pubes hanging off the back of my neck.” – Jeff Oskay [57:13]

14. House Band: Duke Tomato Trio & Musical Interludes

[18:35 – throughout]

• Multiple live performances: "Don’t Have It In Me" (extended blues riff), "I Can’t Find My Shoes" (a musical metaphor about performance anxieties), "Tie You Up" (cheeky romp), and more.
• Cast comments on lyrics, with many bits turning into innuendo or metaphor.

“That song’s about erectile dysfunction.” – Josh Arnold, on “I Can’t Find My Shoes” [70:23]

15. New Slang & Dictionary Words

[129:06 – 135:27]

• Christy Lee brings in new words added to the Cambridge Dictionary:

  • Frost jacking: Stealing a car left running to defrost.
  • Ghost charging: Using EV charging bays as mere parking spaces.
  • Read away: A holiday dedicated to reading books.
  • Thrift tripping: Planning vacations around thrift shopping.
  • Bio-baiting: Overselling oneself in dating profiles.
  • Chat-phishing: Using AI to write dating site messages.
  • Grim keeping: Building relationships over shared dislikes.

• Cast riffs on which ones are legit, which annoy Tom, and which are just made-up.

16. Audience Story: Family Vacation Gone Wild

[107:07 – 112:22]

• Jeff Oskay recounts his Dominican Republic trip, highlighted by hangovers, Queen cover band karaoke, twerking contests, drug offers on the beach, and his family’s various reactions.
• Listener letter describes a disastrous (and expensive) sick-filled Disney trip, adding to the show’s “vacation mishap” lore.

17. News Bits: Trampoline Park Brawl & Returned Mandolins

[112:34 – 113:55]

• Massive fight breaks out among 100 juveniles at a Connecticut trampoline park (with further puns about bouncers).
• Mandolin thief returns stolen instruments with a drunken apology note: “Sorry, I been drunk. Merry Christmas.”

18. Pork Tenderloin: Official Indiana State Sandwich

[147:50 – 150:51]

• Indiana legislature advances a bill to declare the breaded pork tenderloin the state sandwich.
• Side banter about over-sized tenderloins, state rivalries with pastrami, and ranch dressing as the "official beverage."

19. Sports & "Tush Push" Controversy (Buffalo Bills Play)

[104:16 – 104:55]

• Play-by-play walkthrough of a controversial Bills play in which linemen literally carry Josh Allen (“tush push”/“flying wedge 2.0”).
• Mixed opinions on whether it’s “football” or should be banned.

20. Today in History & Birthdays

[159:43 – End]

• Quick walk through significant births/deaths: Rip Taylor, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Trace Adkins, Patrick Dempsey, William Hung (“She Bangs”), and key events (Elton John, Rod Stewart, Beastie Boys album release).

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Memorable Quotes

• On El Conquistador:
  “It is very important that I only be addressed in that fashion as El Conquistador.” (E) [01:15]

• On Playoff Ticket Prices:
  “So if you're there in Oklahoma with Jerry… Help the man out. He’s gonna need some assistance.” — Tom [23:46]

• On Medical Waiting Rooms:
  “We like to keep our patients nice and calm. We don’t want anything too showy… but we don’t want anything that’s not a nice quality.” — Christy/Chick [07:15]

• On Hurtful Jokes:
  “Number one… ‘more chalk.’ This can only be appreciated by watching the video—Tom is laughing while saying it, then puts his head back to howling laughter.” — Listener [21:31]

• On NFL “Tush Push”:
  “The only way I’d allow it is if you’re on offense, being pushed, and I’m on defense, my defense is pushing me into it. Then I’ll allow it.” — Chick [98:07]

• On Bedwetting Blues:
  “That was my blues as a white man. That was my blues growing up.” — Pat Godwin [77:59]

• On Mullets:
  “He had one curly hair, so it just looked like a bowl of pubes hanging off the back of my neck.” — Jeff Oskay [57:13]

• On New Words:
  “Thrift tripping. Makes me want to punch somebody.” — Tom [86:50]

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Music Highlights

• Feature Band: Duke Tomato Trio with the Brass to Mouth Horns
• Live Songs:
  • “Don’t Have It In Me” [40:36–44:54]
  • “I Can’t Find My Shoes” [67:29–70:16]
  • “Tie You Up” [118:38–125:28]
  • “How Much Crazy Can You Take” [150:54–155:36]
  • “Nocturnal Enuresis Blues” [78:12–80:37]
  • “Mullet Song” [61:56–62:43]
• Frequent interludes with studio-quality blues, funk, and cameo solos on bass clarinet, sax, and trumpet.

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Tone & Atmosphere

• Lively, friendly joshing—full of sarcasm, wry observations, and often self-deprecating.
• The recurring sense of inside jokes (among hosts and with regular listeners).
• Family-friendly with acknowledged “adult” tangents, especially in sexual or anatomical humor.
• Frequent callbacks to earlier episodes, running gags, and audience participation.

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Noteworthy Running Gags

• Tom’s obliviousness to common things (jeans pocket, calligraphy/clock contradictions)
• The “hurtful comments to Josh” listener ranking
• Ongoing “blue jeans baby pocket” debate and listener input
• Mullets: retro fashion as a source of jokes and musical tributes
• “Tush Push” as football controversy; playful sports debates
• Rise of “Wooks” and the oddity of jam-band subculture

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Takeaways for Listeners

• The Bob & Tom Show remains rooted in rapid-fire banter, topical sports coverage, and well-honed musical comedy.
• Audience engagement is at the core—listener letters drive segments, provide fodder for ongoing jokes, and allow the cast to riff off “real life.”
• While the episode appears to jump between topics, long-term listeners will catch running themes and in-jokes, making the show both accessible to drop-in listeners and rewarding for regulars.
• Live music is a hallmark of the format, with Duke Tomato’s performances both breaking up and enhancing the comic rhythm.

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Timestamps Index

• [00:52] — El Conquistador Phone Bit
• [05:29] — NFL Recap / Medical Waiting Room
• [10:25] — Tiny Jeans Pocket
• [19:47] — Listener: Tom-isms to Josh
• [22:30] — Baby Jeans Pocket Uses
• [25:24] — Dog Wins Acting Award
• [26:48] — Calligraphy, Clocks, Beards
• [29:08] — Wooks & Subculture
• [33:00] — Sports Desk / Viral Kid Rant
• [55:10] — Mullets & Competition
• [61:56] — "Mullet Song" Performance
• [77:59] — "Nocturnal Enuresis Blues"
• [104:16] — Bills "Tush Push" Play
• [129:06] — New Words Explored
• [147:50] — Pork Tenderloin Sandwich Bill
• [150:54] — Musical Finale: "How Much Crazy Can You Take"
• [159:43] — Today in History

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A spirited showcase of midwestern wit, music, sports nerdery, and cultural absurdities, this Bob & Tom Show episode delivers both for longtime aficionados and new listeners.

Transcript

[A]

New Year, new me.

[B]

Cute.

[C]

But how about New Year, new money?

[A]

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[B]

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[A]

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[D]

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[C]

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[A]

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[D]

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[A]

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[B]

Offers not available in all states. See experian.com for details.

[C]

Experian. It's the bob and tom show.

[D]

New car sales.

[A]

Gordon speaking. Yes.

[D]

I am El Conquistador.

[A]

You are El Conquistador?

[D]

Yes.

[E]

And I would like to make an.

[D]

Appointment to come down and test drive a Mercedes. Yes, sir.

[E]

It is important that I am not addressed as sir. I am not a sir.

[D]

I am El Conquistador.

[A]

And.

[D]

Affirmative.

[E]

Affirmative.

[A]

It is very important that I only.

[E]

Be addressed in that fashion as El Conquistador.

[A]

Could you say it for me?

[D]

El Conquistador.

[B]

What?

[C]

Would you like to drive, sir?

[A]

I am not a sir. I'm sorry.

[E]

I am El Conquistador.

[A]

Brother, let me say one thing. I've come from the south here. My parents brought me up to say, yes, sir. Yes, ma', am.

[C]

No, ma'.

[A]

Am. Yes, sir. Yes, ma'.

[E]

Am.

[C]

No, ma'.

[D]

Am.

[A]

I understand. That's for being. Being polite. But I. No, that's.

[D]

That is.

[A]

That is not my title.

[D]

I am not a sir.

[A]

I am El Conquistador. It's a title that has been in my family for thousands of years. I'll do my best. I am El Conquistador. El Conquistador.

[D]

I'll do.

[A]

I'll do my best. You'll do your best?

[D]

El Conquistador? Yeah.

[A]

So can you tell me what a.

[E]

Good time for you to come in is?

[C]

Anytime, sir, between the.

[D]

Anytime.

[A]

El Conquistador. Between the hours of 8 and 5.

[E]

What is important is that. That the people that you work with know that if they are to do.

[A]

Business with me, that they must refer to me not as sir. I know that is polite, but.

[E]

El Conquistador.

[A]

What does that mean? What does that. What does the title mean?

[E]

Excuse me, who are you addressing?

[D]

Yes.

[E]

The title means the conqueror.

[A]

I thought that's what that. The last part of it.

[C]

L means the.

[A]

Yes.

[E]

Okay, okay.

[D]

El Conquistador.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

I'm sorry.

[D]

El Conquistador.

[A]

That's okay. El Conquistador. When do you think you'll be arriving, El Conquistador.

[E]

I will be arriving next Wednesday around 4 o'.

[D]

Clock.

[A]

Wednesday at 4 o'.

[D]

Clock.

[A]

I'll put you on my.

[D]

That's when your flight lands, Al Conquistador.

[A]

My flight lands at about 3:30.

[C]

Okay, so you'll be here.

[A]

Are you coming directly here, El Conquistador? Yes, I am.

[C]

Okay, Wednesday at 4pm all right, I'll.

[A]

Put that down budget that time for you.

[D]

For whom?

[A]

For you, El Ker. Thank you, El Keador. I'll be waiting to hear from you and to see you. Thank you very much for your time. I hope to do business with you.

[D]

All right, bro.

[A]

Thank you, Al.

[D]

You're welcome.

[A]

All right, bro.

[C]

Ah, it's an El Conquistador kind of day.

[D]

Hello, hello, hello.

[C]

From the O'Reilly Auto Part Studios, it's the Bob and Tom Show. Hello. Christy Lee sitting there at the Silac.

[B]

Insurance news desk, not a care in.

[C]

The world, in an actual cheetah high jacket. Fresh off the cheetah.

[A]

Yeah, looks lovely. Thank you.

[C]

There's Pat Godwin.

[D]

Good to see you, Chick. Hello.

[C]

There's Josh Arnold.

[D]

Hello.

[C]

He's at the I hate Steven Singer sidekick chair. There's Ace Cosby. I'm Chick mcgee and hello Tom.

[A]

Special request for El Conquistador coming from Mac. Excuse me, Mark. Kind enough to write the Bob and Tom Show. And he said I trained Alexa. She now calls me El Conquistador. So when I say Alexa, what's the weather? She'll say it's 45. El conquistador.

[E]

Oh, nice.

[A]

That's so nice. Well, thank you very much. What a great suggestion, Mark. So if you'd like to train your Alexa to listen to our program, that would be very nice. Or have it call you El Conquistador. What is the female version of that?

[C]

El Conquistadoras.

[A]

Oh, that's what it is. It's still got the Los la. Still C O N O. I mean.

[D]

You at least go law though.

[C]

Yeah. I think a lady can be a Conquistador. Is that a conqueror?

[A]

Yeah, I'm not going there. Pat and I are sharing.

[C]

It was all. Ah, it wasn't. Calm down.

[A]

Private filthy dumb joke coming up.

[C]

You got that on the brain.

[A]

The, the house band today, Duke Tomato, the Duke Tomato Trio will be doing our our interstitial music. Thank you very much. I love that word. We know we have a lot to get to. A big sporting news last evening.

[C]

Chick McGee. Yeah. Houston Texans pound the Steelers in Pittsburgh 30 to 6. Houston did not play that well last night, believe it or not. Houston 10th straight win franchises first on the road in the playoffs. Texans are now face the New England Patriots. What year is it? 26. They'll play on the road next Sunday. Buffalo will play at Denver and the other AFC divisional game. Then you got Seattle hosting San Francisco and the Bears hosting the Los Angeles Rams. Yes, sir. Getting down to it, the nitty gritty Tom in the NFL playoffs.

[A]

And how's it going in the world of the shoeing of the week?

[C]

94 and 108 on the season. I was 4 and 3 for this past weekend because my buddy Tom talked me into double shocking because I was all hopped up on relaxing drugs and I said, heck yeah, let's double shock Houston. And I turned out okay.

[A]

Good.

[C]

Yeah. So there you go.

[A]

You had a little medical test yesterday. A little bit. Little bit of the.

[C]

Studied all week and passed with flying colors.

[A]

Some good, good stuff. That's good to know.

[C]

An odd assortment of fellow citizens in the waiting room in there. Yes. Yes, indeed.

[A]

The medical waiting room is different than they used to be because there are no magazines anymore. No.

[B]

They have TVs.

[C]

No, they got TVs and watching HGTV primarily.

[A]

I find that. That's true. That's true. I agree with that. Also a lot of looking at the phones.

[C]

You don't. You. You have a problem with no magazines?

[A]

Not at all. Those magazines were always a filthy full of germs.

[E]

Right?

[C]

Yeah. Okay.

[A]

What are you doing in here? You got the plague too.

[C]

All right.

[A]

Okay. Hand me that 1957 Reader's Digest.

[B]

I saw your post yesterday. And the hospital waiting room furniture is quite the thing, isn't it?

[C]

From the Bland Furniture Company. We like to keep our. We like to keep our patients nice and calm. We don't want anything too showy, but we don't want anything that's not a nice quality.

[B]

And it has to be. You have to be able to wipe it off.

[C]

Yeah. Because, you know.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

Well, you're, you know, having some sort of problem on a chair. You gotta wipe it off. You can't just leave it lay there.

[B]

Have you ever thought about it?

[A]

I mean, not till just now. So it's, in other words, bodily fluids emitting from a variety of orifices.

[C]

A lot of vinyl.

[B]

Yeah, a lot of vinyl, I guess.

[A]

Good to know.

[C]

Well, this. This isn't playing in the. In the waiting room anymore. I don't know where that went, but there's no Muzak. Quiet. Yeah, there's no quiet.

[A]

I think that company actually went away. But certainly. Yeah, certainly the term Muzak is kind of gone.

[C]

Well, I think Denise can bring in her iPhone and, you know.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

Dial up a Bluetooth there in the waiting room.

[A]

I know that the term music actually appears in a John Lennon song.

[C]

I don't.

[E]

I don't know what.

[A]

Which one. You know, there's just Muzak to my ears. Oh, right, yeah. Paul McCartney. Yeah. If you say muzak to anybody under 50, they're not gonna even know what it is. But it. It was at one point called elevator music. Or do you like the Holly Ridge strings? Do the Beatles, crap like that.

[B]

I used to be full radio stations that would play it.

[A]

Oh, yeah, these to call it. They used to call it beautiful music. Beautiful music.

[C]

I worked that for. Maybe.

[B]

I had to work. It was on the other station in the station I was working for. And I had to go down there and check the reels every now and then, make sure it was running.

[A]

Bob and I used to have to do the announcements.

[C]

All of the music was on reels. You had to keep your reels all threaded up.

[A]

But, I mean, it was just like the skit that ended up on, I think, either SNL or Fridays where you're doing top 40 on the one station and then you walk down the hallway and record the Michigan's beautiful north weather. Oh, yeah.

[C]

Today.

[A]

And you had to kind of go into that. That mellow voice. Then you turned into Johnny Fever when you went down the hall.

[B]

I think if I'm not mistaken, the actual frequency might be our little sister station down the hall here now. Yeah, I mean, it's. It was crazy. The guy that ran the Beautiful. They actually had a guy that was supposed to be working there. He would always fall asleep. So that's why I had to go down there. He always fell asleep. Well, if you can imagine, the music's pretty calming and relaxing and.

[A]

Yeah. Now just talking about it and falling asleep.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Now, coming up in sports, well, a little bit of a review of what's coming up.

[C]

Yeah. Monday night or last night. Once again, Texans beat the Steelers 30 to 6. George Kittle's gonna miss the playoff game this weekend. He has a torn Achilles. There was something about his treatment we'll share with you and you. Like a mullet. Well, evidently they had a competition for the best mullet you've missed. If you think you have a great mullet, you missed the competition. Sorry, but. But there was a champion.

[D]

All right.

[A]

Now, are you wearing blue jeans today? I didn't know.

[C]

I am. Yes.

[A]

This came up yesterday and I had forgotten this. I. That blue jeans have a pocket Right here.

[C]

Oh, a little baby.

[B]

Baby pocket.

[C]

Little watch pocket or something.

[B]

Yeah, watch pocket. That's what we learned.

[A]

I'd forgotten that. It's that there. I've never used it that I can recall.

[C]

Now, do all jeans have that or is just Levi's?

[A]

No, all of them.

[C]

All of them have a little baby.

[E]

Yeah.

[D]

I'm not wearing Levi's today and I have it.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

And. But I don't think it gets used much. We've had a couple of letters about what people are using it for.

[B]

Oh, that's interesting.

[D]

And you're being very generous.

[C]

Yeah. That's like the little. Those little teeny tiny glad bags. The little plastic glad bags with the seal at the top. They're about the size of a postage stamp. I wonder what they use those for.

[A]

I know exactly.

[C]

In producing mass quantities. And those would fit in your little baby pockets.

[B]

I use them for my earrings.

[A]

Oh, very good.

[C]

You put earrings in little plastic.

[B]

Yeah. And then you know where they are and you don't lose one.

[D]

Doesn't the coke get all over them?

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Are you out of drugs?

[A]

You just pop them in your mouth. Nothing. Nothing more. Nothing more flavorful than baby laxative and amphetamines ground up. We'll answer some of those questions also. Are you watching the Pit?

[C]

I am, but I don't have all the episodes. You know me, I like to bank them before I.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

I like to watch three or four at a time, so.

[A]

Because I've only watched the first few minutes of season two, and it's about an ER doctor.

[C]

Is it just as good or can you tell?

[A]

I. I fell asleep. I'm sorry.

[D]

Flat.

[C]

I was. That's not exactly an endorsement.

[A]

No, I was exhausted. So, in any event, it's. He's an ER doctor. And then the opening segment, he's driving a motorcycle into work in Pittsburgh and it's, you know, beautiful. Going through traffic and. But he's not wearing a helmet.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

Which I thought an experienced ER doc.

[A]

I just thought that was kind of unusual. And then when you see him walking.

[D]

He'S idiotic is what it is.

[A]

When he's got a helmet hanging from his backpack. And I. I was talking to a friend of mine yesterday who said, oh, yeah, I noticed the same thing. Josh, I think, noticed it. Got a letter here saying, FYI, there's a reason he's not wearing a helmet. That will become clear later in the show.

[E]

Oh.

[A]

It's part of a storyline.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

So how does that person.

[D]

Yeah.

[E]

Privy too.

[A]

He says he saw an interview With Noah Wiley.

[D]

So who knows who watches an interview with Noah Wiley?

[A]

Very interesting guy.

[C]

Honey, I got that interview coming up. No one. I want to clear all decks.

[D]

Yeah. Anyway, you guys, shut up.

[C]

This is Noah Wiley. He's a fascinating guy. It's interesting.

[A]

Never mind. But we also have uses for this pocket coming up.

[C]

The teeny tiny baby.

[A]

I honestly had forgotten that it was even there.

[B]

Really?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You never put. Well, what would I put in it? A coin?

[C]

I get the feeling you want us to say when you go, I forgot that was there. You want us to go. That's fascinating. And it's really not.

[D]

Who brought it up yesterday? I don't even remember.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Was it Willie? Somebody brought it up?

[A]

Yeah, I think Willie puts his. Is that where he puts his.

[D]

That's right. Well, his used zins.

[B]

That was it.

[A]

Oh, because I was complaining about the fact that there are those used Zinn. Whatever. They are lozenges packets. All over my street because one of the. Apparently one of the guys that walks his dog spits them out all over street, which bothers me.

[C]

Well, you know, why don't you have one of those little easy street cleaners, you know, with the little. There's a hinge and you take your broom and sweep it into the.

[A]

I have one of them.

[C]

Of course you do. Well, why don't you get. Get on top of that and go up and down your street and sweep those up.

[A]

I use my grab. He has the grabber thing.

[C]

I like to grab your ass.

[A]

The pistol grip. Right. Now I want to talk about cars. Christy Lee's our Hyundai girl. Hyundai. And the Hyundai Palisade. It's brand new and it's got something pretty cool, which is a range of 600 plus miles. I'm talking about the Palisade Hybrid, an incredible SUV. It's big. It'll fit the whole family.

[B]

It's third row seating, seven passengers, up to 35 miles per gallon. It's an incredible vehicle.

[A]

But even the Hyundai people couldn't do the thing that when you have a car that has that third row every couple of weeks, you got to climb back there and go on a little scavenger hunt, look for clean it out, stray french fries, maybe a Stanley. You know what I'm talking about? It's a huge vehicle. It's great. It's the Hyundai Palisade Hybrid. Once again, I'll emphasize the fact that up to 600 plus miles of range and many of the advantages of an EV with the advantages of a gasoline powered car at the same time. And so check out the Hyundai by visiting the Hyundai Palisade. Did I say Palisade? I meant to say the Hyundai Palisade. Visit and find out about the Palisade hybrid by going to Hyundai USA.com youm'll find it at H Y U N D A I Hyundai USA.com you could even give them a call for more information. 562-314-4603. That's Hyundai USA.com coming up, we have Duke Tomato, the Duke Tomato Trio and some live music. Also, we have the a world record. And then an interesting thing in the world of law involving sandwiches. Very important. And some new words from the, from the dictionary.

[C]

Do you know a judge can stop the proceedings and have a sandwich anytime he wants?

[D]

Yes.

[C]

Right there at the bench.

[B]

He's the judge.

[D]

And if he ever yells order in the court, you of course have to say, I'll have ham and cheese on it.

[A]

I did not, did not know because.

[C]

He can do that. He's the judge.

[A]

Does the jury get to have a no. Okay.

[C]

Just asking.

[A]

We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show. Now that the holidays are over, you might be feeling like you've got a big spending hangover. The drinks, the holiday food, the gifts, it all adds up.

[C]

Luckily, Mint Mobile is here to help you cut back on overspending on wireless this January with 50% off unlimited premium wireless. Mint Mobile's end of year sale is still going on, but only until the end of this month.

[B]

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[C]

Hey, good morning and welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. There's Christy Lee at the SILAC Insurance news desk. Hi There's Pat Godwin. Hello, there's Josh Arnold at the I hate Steven Singer sidekick chair.

[D]

Yes. Get the number one gift, Valentine's Day. A 24 karat gold dipped rose from Stephen Singer jewelers. It's a real rose dipped in real gold and guaranteed last a lifetime. I hate stevensinger.com.

[C]

Ah, there's Ace Cosby. I'm Chick Magee at the prize pick sports desk. And hello, Tom.

[A]

Hello, Chick McGee. You can hear some music there in the background. That's live music as it's happening. We got the Duke Tomato trio augmented by the brass to mouth horns today. Sounding good there, Duke. Love the sound of those horns. Your guitar playing is also very fun.

[B]

I was gonna say.

[C]

Once again, the king of the left handed comment.

[A]

Love and enjoyed this very much. We're gonna check in with emails. Emails.

[C]

That's right, emails from our listeners brought to you by sleep number bed. Enjoy personalized comfort for better sleep night after night. And now it's the Buy More save More event. Save on beds, bases, pillows and more only at sleep number or sleepnumber.com and.

[A]

To clarify by meaning saving on bases, we're not talking about bass guitars. Although Bill Ritter is a fine bass player, I'm sure he can give you a good tip on where to, where to grab a bass.

[C]

This first letter I have could be an all time.

[D]

Do you you tell them to stop or do they just stop?

[C]

I don't know.

[A]

Oh, they do. We're gonna check in with our letters, so let's. We'll introduce the band in just a few minutes. Thank you very much, fellas.

[C]

Now, Dear Bob and Tom show. Below are my top four comments and moments. Tom went out of his way to be a dick to Josh. Oh, I know there are many more than just four, but these are my most memorable ones.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

And I don't want to build this up too much, but this could be the all time email listener letter number four. Tom mentioned to Josh one day that hockey ranks just behind fencing in popularity. Oh, because Josh, big hockey fan. Number three, Josh's marionette puppet of course would need steel cables and have to be worked with a crane.

[A]

Oh, wow.

[D]

I don't remember that one.

[A]

I don't recall saying that.

[C]

You don't recall saying?

[A]

No.

[D]

I don't think any of us have any doubts.

[B]

No.

[C]

Oh, of course he said number two. As a guest, Josh talked about his then girlfriend. Tom made several references to her seeing eye dog. And of course this is close to the number one hurtful comment. What I had to Pull into a rest area off of a highway to catch my breath after the third time he said seeing eye dog to Josh.

[D]

Yes, of course.

[C]

Implying that his girlfriend. And you're. Just because you don't remember these certainly.

[D]

Doesn'T mean she must have been blind.

[B]

To be with Josh. Is what.

[A]

Insinuating any of these things.

[C]

And number one, of course, the all time comment that Tom hurt Josh. Simply the two words more chalk. Sure, that's right. And as a special bonus, Robert continues. This can truly only be appreciated by watching the video. Tom is laughing while saying more chalk. And then puts his head back to howling laughter.

[D]

They're all funny.

[A]

What was the context of the More chalk line.

[D]

A body outline. The. If they were doing an outline of my body.

[C]

Sorry, that's from Robert in Brattleboro, Vermont.

[D]

Brattleboro?

[C]

Yeah. Never heard of that. Good morning.

[A]

Now, we have a number of letters about the tiny pocket that we mentioned in the. In blue jeans that we. I've just forgotten about it. I mean, obviously we're in jeans all the time. You'd think maybe you'd remember that it's there. Do you ever use that chicken?

[E]

No.

[C]

No, I never forgot about it because I never remembered him.

[A]

Pat, you ever used that thing?

[D]

No.

[A]

No. Well, I gotta. I've got a use for you. For me?

[B]

Oh, I bet.

[A]

Oh, I know what it is.

[D]

Can I guess?

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Guitar picks.

[E]

Yep.

[A]

Yeah, I. I guess that'd be pretty handy for guitar.

[D]

Absolutely.

[A]

Yeah. Not much else. Also, we had an important letter yesterday about Valentine's Day. And the fact of the matter is, Valentine's Day is on a Saturday this year. So yesterday we advised all listeners to be prepared by making your reservations. Now I got this nice letter from Jerry in Oklahoma. He goes, hey, thanks for the tip on Valentine's Day because it falls on a Saturday, by the way, it's also my wife's birthday. Oh, good luck, Jerry.

[C]

Wow.

[A]

Wow. This is. I guess, in a way that's kind of good.

[B]

You get it. Yeah. Two for one. Yeah, but do you have to get her two gifts or does the one count?

[D]

Yeah, I would do something the week before, you know. Which one do you want to do the week before your birthday or Valentine's Day?

[A]

I think you get. Well, boy, that's a tough call.

[C]

That has to be set up way in advance too. So you know.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

What you're doing from that point forward.

[A]

So if you are there in Oklahoma with Jerry. Help. Help the man out. He's gonna. He's gonna need some assistance. This is a rather Unusual letter. This comes to us from Tim. He has a co worker who had a child a few months back and she is breastfeeding the child on site.

[C]

All right.

[A]

Now, we happen to have someone in our sphere here who is having a baby in a few weeks.

[B]

Yes. I can't wait.

[C]

I don't know what the climate is for her, right. Breastfeeding or not breastfeeding, but I mean.

[A]

Yeah, and I don't know, she'll be in and out of the building and, you know, of course that's fine.

[B]

She has an office. She can shut her door.

[C]

I'm sure that we have to make arrangements here. That's fine.

[A]

He goes, I was chatting with her, and then a few days later, I couldn't remember the word for breast pump, and I blurted out, did you bring your boob juicer?

[C]

Ah.

[A]

She thought that was quite funny.

[C]

Oh, really?

[A]

As opposed to. As opposed to being actionable. Thank you for that. That's the word I was looking for.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Now every time she's got it to go, she'll say, hey, I've got to grab my boob juicer. By the way, Happy New Year. Well, thank you, Tim. That's pretty funny, boy. Boob juicer sounds like it'd be painful.

[B]

Yeah, it's.

[A]

Well, if you've ever operated a juicer and made carrot juice, you could imagine how painful that might be. Now, Chick, do you have another letter over there?

[C]

Looks like this is just. Well, a couple more. Dear Bob a Tom Show. I used to train Labrador retrievers for hunting, and every now and then you would come across a duck tolling retriever.

[A]

Oh, yeah, that's. We had that story yesterday.

[C]

Okay. They are used to swim amongst the duck decoys to stir up the water, making the ducks look alive.

[B]

They look like skinny golden retrievers a little bit.

[A]

A little white patch. Beautiful dog. And we brought it up because the Astra Awards. Josh helped me here. This is.

[D]

It's the Los Angeles Online Critics Awards.

[A]

And a. The dog won one of those dogs. 1. What was it?

[D]

Was it the Good Boy dog Chick?

[C]

Yeah, Good boy.

[D]

Did you see it?

[C]

I haven't seen it yet. I can't. I don't know what it is. I'm kind of. I'm kind of scared of it.

[A]

It says, yeah, a dog won best performance in a horror thriller at the Astro. It's a Nova Scotia duck tolling retriever.

[B]

Named Indy beat out Ethan Hawke and Allison the movie Good Boy.

[D]

I mean, it's unfair. It's obviously a different category. There should be a Different category for anim performances.

[C]

Was he.

[A]

Sure, yeah.

[C]

Was it Ethan Hawke's voice doing.

[D]

No, no.

[B]

Actual actors.

[C]

Well, that doesn't make any sense.

[D]

So.

[C]

Yeah, I'd give it to the dog.

[D]

The dog won.

[A]

Absolutely. However, and if you saw the. Saw the. The presentation, the. The red carpet's not red everywhere.

[D]

Oh, man. You know that wasn't Ethan Hawke. That was the dog. Right?

[C]

Ain't that always the dog?

[A]

If it was Mr. Hawk, that would just be terrible.

[B]

Now, I have some letters.

[A]

Okay, what do you got?

[B]

So let me get this straight. This is from David. Tom hates calligraphy because it's hard to read, but he likes analog clocks, right?

[C]

Right.

[A]

That's correct. And I don't like Roman numerals.

[B]

Okay.

[D]

Yeah, I don't think there's a. I.

[A]

Don'T see the connection.

[D]

Neither do I.

[B]

Well, he does. So I was just reading it.

[A]

Oh, I get it. Oh, I.

[B]

Because I think is what he meant to say.

[A]

No, but he means. Because they're both kind of old school, right fashioned.

[C]

That's true.

[A]

I get that.

[D]

Analog is not the actual numbers you can see, right?

[B]

Yeah. But you have to read it. It doesn't say, you know, 440.

[D]

Just a bad letter. That's all.

[B]

This is from Kathy. Good morning, family. Ace that beard. Love it. Thanks for all the laughs and getting me through the day. Thank you, Kathy.

[C]

Thank you.

[B]

See?

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

It even.

[C]

It looks even more magnificent now. It looks better today. Yeah. What do you think, Tom?

[A]

I'm not a fan. Gotta jump on board. It looks good. I'm not gonna jump on board.

[C]

I've got Tom get involved with aces Beard. Let's go.

[D]

I love the way you look at Tom. Like today is today.

[C]

Let's Make a Deal gives you a little smile.

[A]

Chad writes, I'm 47 years old. I live in Goodlettsville, Texas. What a great name. Oh, I'm sorry. Goodlettsville, Tennessee. Forgive me. I'm 47 years old. I do not sit down to put my socks on. I don't know. I. Why you guys all think you have to sit down to put yourself.

[B]

Your head. You'll understand why.

[A]

I don't know. I have enough balance. I'm an adult. Okay. I can.

[B]

All right.

[C]

Did your father put your. Oh, no, your father didn't put it.

[A]

Well, no.

[C]

He didn't do anything standing up, Right?

[A]

That's correct.

[C]

He was in a chair, Right? That's right.

[A]

He had polio. He was wheelchair bound.

[C]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

What else have we got here? Oh, again, another letter. Dennis in Lodi, California, anyone?

[D]

No. Have you been Credence?

[A]

Right, the great song Lo Die Stuck in Lodi again. Anyone?

[B]

Ccr?

[A]

Yeah. Very good. Thank you, Christy. Because I use that fifth pocket of my jeans for my guitar picks. A jam session could happen at any time. Oh, now, speaking of jam sessions.

[C]

Yeah, but I think that's rude. Guitar players have to be careful about jam sessions.

[E]

Why is that?

[C]

Well, no, I mean, you can't be the guy whipping out your guitar all the time.

[D]

No, no.

[C]

It becomes irritating.

[D]

It's very irritating.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

What's between the difference between a jelly session and a jam session? I don't know. What, you want to go to lunch?

[B]

I can't. Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Jelly. Jelly. A tambourine up here. Your ass. I think it's the final.

[C]

Attaboy.

[A]

You were discussing Wooks. W O O K S. Do you remember this?

[B]

Yeah. There's a new dating reality show for Wooks.

[A]

It's being produced. You can, you can.

[B]

Looking for Love.

[A]

Yes. And you can sign up to enter if you want.

[C]

Looking for Love. The wrong place.

[A]

And I was not aware of the term, but it's apparently quite common.

[B]

Well, he was very aware of it.

[A]

It's a. It's a slang term. The official definition is here. Someone who is deeply involved in the subculture surrounding the jam band scene, sometimes called the hippie music scene.

[C]

Oh, I like that.

[A]

Walking for Love is going to feature 16 walks seeking love. And by the way, if you want to get in on this, you go to the walking W O O K I N G Walking for For Love website to enter and they're going to pick 16 people and they're going to. I think it's a pretty funny idea. But these are primarily people who follow the jam band scene. So now this is a letter from Chaz, who says Wook is kind of a negative term. Wooks are typically untrustworthy, physically dirty, conniving folks in the jam festival scene. They are associated with activity like raiding tents, selling bad drugs and trying to put one over on somebody.

[C]

Raiding tents and put one over on somebody.

[A]

So there you go. I'm not sure how to expand, expand.

[D]

So they're less like Wookiees and more like the. Was it the Tuscan raiders? Is that what they called those guys?

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

Apparently the origin of Wookiee is because they tended to be Wookie looking, smelly looking.

[C]

Oh, all hairy and stuff.

[A]

Okay. And apparently they're going to be like, you know, hula hoop competitions.

[C]

And I'm excited to hear the word hippie being Used. I'm kind of sad for that to go.

[A]

Well, that's in the official definition in this. In this story from live for live music.

[C]

Hippie and yuppie and yippee and ki.

[A]

Yuppie really went away. Yuppie was short lived.

[D]

I think it's live for live music.

[A]

Oh, could be. As opposed to live for live. Yeah. I never could figure that out.

[D]

That's one of those tough.

[A]

You say short lived or short lived?

[D]

Short lived.

[C]

I don't have a policy on that.

[A]

Well then what do you do when you see it?

[C]

I just skip it. Yeah, I just skip it. Just.

[A]

Just short.

[C]

I make it sound like I'm going under a bridge. Short. That's right.

[A]

And then Chad. Chad says, by the way, rest in peace to the great Bob Weird. Once again, Bob Weir from the Grateful Dead and the many variations that he proceeded with following the death of Jerry Garcia. Bobby in the Midnights, Dead and company Bobby in the Midnights, Rat Dog, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.

[D]

He seemed like he was a really good guy.

[A]

He lived to play with all kinds. And all the musicians that play with him say he was the greatest guy ever.

[D]

Nice.

[A]

Very sad news. And wrote some of the. And sang some of the. The best songs of the dead.

[C]

It was trouble. He had trouble ordering a pizza, though.

[D]

He did.

[C]

Because of the last name Bob Weird. Is that weird? No, no, it's just weird.

[D]

Just weird.

[C]

Just weird. W E I R. Had to constantly spell it.

[A]

Now what's coming up in sports?

[C]

Pepperoni, cheese. He gave extra mushrooms.

[D]

He gave up pizza altogether.

[C]

Gave it up. We had a Monday Night Football game last night, Tom. Not any game. It was a playoff game. And the Texans dispatched the Pittsburgh Steelers in Pittsburgh, 30 to 6. Is Mike Tom way out? Well, we will see. And the playoffs continue this coming weekend. Buffalo, Denver, Seattle hosting San Francisco, Chicago hosting the Rams in Houston at New England. And it's a good time of year. NFL playoffs. Tom, there you go.

[A]

I've got an idea for our friends at Apple.

[C]

I bet you do.

[A]

Because I was just looking at one of these letters was pointing out that they claim, and I don't know if this is true, that the little tiny pocket on your blue jeans on the right there was originally for a pocket watch. Right. Which may or may not be true. Why doesn't Apple come out with the Apple pocket watch?

[D]

That's interesting. So it's just like the Apple watch, all the info from your like your pulse and everything, all that.

[A]

No, but it's. If you like, you Know the charm of the old days with contemporary.

[B]

You could just take this part without the band and put it in, but.

[A]

Make it like a round one.

[B]

Right?

[D]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

No, but you like Pat says you're.

[D]

Going to miss the biometrics.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

Though that's what everybody uses it for primarily, I think. Right. Which is even funnier actually.

[A]

But Pat, this is kind of combining. Of course the idea is the word I'm looking for is idiotic.

[C]

No, I think I, I would think I would interest more likely to carry a pocket watch than an Apple watch.

[A]

You could, I guess somebody could make a case, an aftermarket case that your Apple watch would click into that you could wear. Pocket watch. Yeah, that'd be.

[C]

I'm sure you can get a pocket watch face on your Apple watch.

[B]

I know that because the straps come off.

[A]

You could become Chick, the pipe guy. You've wanted to become the pipe guy for a while.

[C]

I do want to be the pipe guy.

[D]

You know what? You are the pipe guy.

[C]

If for no other reason than to have the new promo. The new headshots of me in a pipe, squinting through the street.

[B]

You don't have to smoke it, actually, just have a pipe.

[C]

Oh, I'll smoke.

[A]

When's the last time you saw someone smoking a traditional pipe, not a marijuana related device or crack or Boy, maybe two years ago.

[D]

I remember it was outside of a hotel and I was just thrilled to see it.

[A]

Wait a minute, is that Fred McMurray?

[C]

Fred McMurray is this.

[D]

He was kind of an older gentleman.

[A]

And he had it my three sons.

[D]

And he tapped it out and it was awesome.

[B]

If I recall correctly, there was a time when the youngsters. It was kind of a thing for a while. Yeah, it was.

[C]

And I remember, I bet old time he smoked.

[B]

Yeah, this was like a hipster kid. Yeah, he was probably in early 20s.

[A]

Well, right now I want to say thanks to the folks at Home Serve for sponsoring the Bob and Tom Show. Many of us are homeowners and it's always a double edged sword because everything is great and then it's not. Maybe you've got. Maybe you've got.

[C]

That's homeownership.

[A]

All right, You've got insurance, you've got, you've got maybe homeowners insurance, of course, but it doesn't cover a lot of that little stuff. You know what I'm talking about? That pipe that bursts upstairs in the middle of the night. Or in my case, an old septic system that you didn't use anymore that somehow decided it was going to back up in your basement. I've been there. And when that happens, you've got to get help immediately. And HomeServe is all about having you access the kind of folks that can help you out very quickly. And HomeServe starts at a very reasonable $4.99 a month. So when those repairs hit fast and hard, very handy. By the way, this is kind of interesting. A couple quick numbers for you. Out of 4.5 million customers reviewing HomeServe, a 4.8 out of 5 for a post repair rating. Also from the Better Business Bureau, an A rating. So do your homework. See if HomeServe is something you'd like to get involved with. Protect your home systems in your wallet, HomeServe, and find out what repairs are covered and the whole array of different programs you can get involved with. Homeserve.com and by the way, it's not available everywhere, so make sure that it's available where you live by [e-mail] Most plans range between $4.99 and $11.99 a month for the first year. Terms of plan covered repairs get all the details. Homeserve.com Coming up, we're to check in with the Duke Tomato Trio. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[D]

Thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom show this morning.

[A]

Catch any part of the show you.

[D]

Missed later today on our YouTube channel.

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[C]

Is Beaver legal tender?

[D]

It's tender. Hey, and sometimes not legal.

[C]

Welcome back to the Violent Time Show.

[A]

By the way, the proceeding several words if they make sense to you. You've got a problem.

[C]

Hello, Christy lee.

[B]

Hi. Chick McGee.

[C]

She's at the Psylocke Insurance news desk. There's Pat Godwin.

[A]

Hey, Chick.

[C]

Pat's gonna have a song today, aren't you sure? Damn right you are. There's. There's Josh Arnold.

[D]

Hi.

[C]

These are the I Hate Stephen Singer, sidekick chair. There's Ace Cosby.

[D]

Hello.

[C]

We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. I'm Chick. Hello, Tom.

[A]

That's live music you're hearing there. Ladies and gentlemen, the house band today, the Duke Tomato Trio. Got a nice letter here. I just saw the incredible Duke Tomato play at the Ark in Ann Arbor last Friday. By the way, tell Josh no animals were harmed at the Ark.

[D]

Oh, good, good. Glad to hear.

[C]

You'd have to have all the MCs call themselves Noah. Right, I'm Noah. Welcome to the Ark.

[A]

Right, we got Duke Tomato on the guitar, Bill Ritter on the bass. We're in the badass shades. What are the bass players always wear the shades. Are they all hopped up?

[D]

Oh, I don't know. Maybe Bill can that.

[C]

Okay, tell us.

[A]

The handsome Dawson Willette on the drums. The Brasta Mouth horns. Jay Young, Neil Broker and Kent Hickey on those horns. Hey, Duke. How's it going in there?

[E]

Well, how about you?

[A]

Oh, good, good, good. Can you favor us with a tune? I gotta mention a couple quick things. I don't know if you heard me say. You're just getting some praises from folks who saw you with the Ark. Just in Ann Arbor, Michigan, just the other day.

[E]

And Tom in Lebowski's in Washington, Iowa. I just went there recently.

[A]

He was there.

[D]

They just loved him.

[A]

So want to relay that to Duke at Lebowski's Bowski's. They loved him, all right. Yeah, That's a great name.

[E]

Yeah, it was a fun place.

[A]

Now Duke favors with a quick tune. A little something to wake us up here.

[C]

Don't put it in me.

[D]

Sure.

[E]

Mark came in and asked. Nevermind, we'll talk about it later. But it's funny. 1, 2, 1, 2, 3, 4. From early in the morning till late at night she's telling me I can't do nothing right I can't take it what can I say? I pack my back get away yes for Satan, baby yes, for sure don't have it in me to put it her no more. Wrong color roses Perfume don't smell right Don't. I like that movie that I took a chance to last night. I work too much but I'm Always around Her voice can be an irritating sound man Yes s the show don't have it in me to put it in her no more. Okay, now. Get down now get back up again. Now.

[C]

Now here we go.

[E]

Like that. I tell you I'm not all I might have been But I'm no fat head and my patience gets thin her mother's on some eternal quest I put she put that thing to rest yes, for Satan, baby yes, for sure don't have it in me to put it in her no more Lord, I don't have it in me I don't have it in me no, don't you have it in me I don't have it in me that's the same that's for sure don't have it in me to put it in her no more don't have it in me I don't have it in me no, I don't have it in me have it in me that's for Satan that's for sure don't have it me to put it in the house. No more hey.

[A]

Duke.

[E]

No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

[C]

Duke Tomato.

[A]

The Duke Tomato Trio featuring the brass to mouth horns. I love that one, Duke. I love the. The term fathead. That's. That takes me back when I was a kid.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Hey, fathead. Nobody else enjoys that as much as I do.

[C]

Well, thank you, lunkhead. How do you feel about lunkhead?

[A]

Good. A fathead takes you back a couple hundred years. It's kind of an old, old term. You just don't hear it much.

[D]

I know. It's pretty new to me.

[A]

Really?

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Oh, it's from, like, the 1850s.

[C]

Wow.

[E]

I wrote that song about 1850.

[A]

Duke will be featured at many spots, including the Wilde Theater in Edwardsville, Illinois, coming up this Thursday. Just a couple days. Away with the horns. All right, that'll be cool. We'll talk with Duke in just a second. We've got to check in with Chick Magee at the Sports Desk. Your letters @bob and tomobandtom.com these are the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[D]

Add to or continue the conversation.

[A]

Check out the Bob and Tom show on Facebook. Get the [e-mail] this is the Bob and Tom Show. It's awesome.

[D]

You're going to love it. I am going to give it to you.

[A]

Thank you. All right. Thanks for being here.

[E]

Thank you.

[C]

If you're shopping while working, eating, or even listening to this podcast, then you know and learn.

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[B]

That's R A K U T E N.

[A]

Thanks, Ashley, for being here.

[C]

You are welcome back to the Bob and Top show. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts studios. Think O'Reilly Auto Parts for all your car care needs. Get the parts and service you need fast from the professional parts people at O'Reilly Auto Parts. There's Christy Lee.

[B]

Hi.

[C]

There's Pat Godwin.

[B]

Hello.

[C]

There's Jeff Oskay.

[D]

Hey, man.

[C]

There's Josh Arnold.

[D]

Hi.

[C]

Ace Cosby's here. Hey, I'm Chick Magee at the Prize Picks sports desk. Hello, Tom.

[A]

Sorry. Hello. Hello, Chick. Welcome back.

[C]

Keep it to yourself and have time to laugh. Let's move along.

[D]

There's no room for liberty here.

[C]

That's right.

[A]

This is no time for levity. We got the house band. That's the Duke Tomato Trio. I love that sound. Those big fat horns. Duke, the boys and the Horns will be at the Wildy Theater in Edwardsville, Illinois, coming up this Thursday. Thursday. It's more dates on the way. We'll talk to them and we'll listen to Duke and the boys in just a few minutes. Thank you very much, Duke. Now we got a couple things we got to get to here in the world of sports. We have Chick McGee at the sports desk. What's happening?

[C]

Houston's stingy defense knocked Aaron Rodgers, sacked him four times. The Steelers knocked out of the NFL playoffs. Texans onto the divisional round to complete wild card weekend. Last night, Texas sacked Rogers four times, scored two defensive touchdowns and held Pittsburgh to just 175 yards. A 30 to 6 beat down of Pittsburgh on Monday night. It was the Texans 10th straight win and the franchise's first on the road in the playoffs. And here's Aaron Rodgers after the game when asked about the climate of Pittsburgh, about Mike Tomlin, about possibly broadcasting and of course, the effect of carnivals and direct mail in the National Football League.

[D]

Here he is.

[C]

When I first got in the league, there wouldn't be conversation about whether those guys were on the hot seat. You know, but the way that the league is covered now and the way that there's snap decisions and the validity given to the, you know, the Twitter experts and all the, you know, experts.

[D]

On TV now who. Well, I.

[C]

You make it seem like they know what the hell they're talking about.

[D]

To me, that's an absolute joke. For either those two guys to be.

[C]

On the hot seat is what is really apropos of where we're at as.

[D]

A society in a league.

[C]

Tell that to John Harbaugh. But anyway, we'll see.

[A]

Making a good point.

[D]

He's also. Don't they. Why do these guys have to be talked to after a loss like that?

[C]

I don't know why. I don't know why they do that. I don't know why they talk to the coaches on the sidelines. I don't see it.

[D]

It's such a bummer.

[A]

Is anyone ever said anything interesting during the game when they talk to the coach?

[C]

It's a lot better than it used to be, but it's still so small.

[B]

Get to see pretty girls and.

[A]

Yeah, could they get it. Could they get some tolerance? By the way, there was one the other night that was like, four, two. Talking to a guy who was six, eight.

[B]

I've been there now.

[A]

Holding the mic up.

[B]

Yep.

[D]

I get uncomfortable, too. Chick.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

What are you.

[A]

What are you gonna do the second half to score points, Coach? Well, we thought we'd do is take our pants off and flail our wangs around to distract the team.

[D]

What was he gonna.

[A]

He's gonna tell you, right?

[D]

And plus, I'm working here. We. You please just leave me alone.

[A]

Alone.

[C]

It's kind of important what I'm trying to do.

[B]

Kurt said that Signetti, after the IU win that the Peach bowl, he goes, are you having fun here? And he goes, well, I had to do two 10 news conferences or press conferences after the game. I haven't had chance to have fun. It's like.

[A]

Then he said, I go get a beer.

[C]

Yeah. The Eagles have been ushered out of the National Football League playoffs. And there was a young Eagles fan who's gone viral. He's very upset about. He went to the Philadelphia Eagles game over the weekend, and he. They were beaten by the 49ers 2319 in Philadelphia. And this young Eagles fan was not too happy about it.

[B]

Feeling two of two things. A, I want A.J. brown packing his bags, and I Want.

[E]

Him somewhere else that is not here.

[B]

I love you, AJ but, like, you.

[E]

Can'T make those drops in that game. And I also want Kevin Petullo flipping.

[B]

Burgers at, like, the local McDonald's.

[C]

Offensive coordinator.

[B]

An offensive coordinator. It's like he's flipping burgers. One side he's cooking. One half he's cooking, and the other.

[A]

Half is completely raw.

[C]

There it is, completely raw.

[D]

Hey, get that guy. Get him on a show.

[C]

Obviously, I'd like to see his picks. Aaron Rodgers didn't know about this kid. He got tickets for Christmas, apparently. Oh, yeah, well, there's a smart kid. That'll happen. That's right.

[A]

Seems to know the game. Yeah.

[C]

Let's see. And if you'd like to go to see the Indiana Hoosiers, the Miami Hurricanes, on Monday night for the national championship game at Miami's home field, Hard Rock Stadium, you're gonna have to. Well, you're gonna have to spend some money. Starting price for tickets, $3,000 for a seat. Way up high. It says here, across several different ticket sale sites, including StubHub, Ticketmaster, and SeatGeek, an IU economist, Kyle Anderson said, of course, it's all supply and demand. These are definitely, I think Kyle said, higher than you would have seen in years past. So demand extremely high. Primarily driven by IU fans. I think they're. I think they're looking at this like this is a once in a lifetime thing.

[D]

Thank you for teaching us about supply and demand.

[C]

I don't think it's. I don't think this might be a.

[A]

What will be interesting.

[D]

Any more vagaries?

[A]

I think this, maybe. You said this, Christie, at the Rose Bowl. They said it was 80, 20 IU fans.

[C]

Well, with Miami, that being their home field.

[B]

Yeah, that's gonna be a little different.

[A]

But, yeah, it'll be interesting to see.

[C]

Are they IU fans? Travel, man.

[A]

I know a lot of people that are going.

[B]

So do I. And it's a big alumni base. It has some money. And.

[C]

And this says right here, continuing with the supply and demand.

[A]

Do we have the Laffer curve analysis.

[C]

Of the ticket prices? Could go as high as $20,000. If you'd like to sit.

[D]

If demand continues to grow at the 50 yard line. Because supply will continue to shrink as demand grows.

[C]

Exactly.

[A]

Thank you. Do we have a graph? Okay. Thank you very much.

[C]

I always like the laugher curve because I always like to laug.

[A]

I don't know what it means, but I can drop the name.

[C]

Speaking of 49ers and the Eagles, George Kittle suffered torn Achilles during a Sunday's.

[A]

What's the deal by the way, with the Achilles? I mean lately?

[C]

What do you mean?

[A]

It seems to be a lot more.

[D]

Dipped him in the wall.

[A]

You got your Halberton, you've got your Daniel Jones.

[D]

What?

[C]

I do not know. You got your cousin, you got your Aaron Rodgers.

[A]

Couple years ago, it seems like suddenly the thing to put you out for.

[C]

A year it's in fashion.

[A]

Wow.

[C]

Evidently though, Kittle has. He and his Achilles have come to a separation agreement. And he had a special request though, as he watched from the locker room. Yes, the athletics Diana Rossini was the four of the first to notice that a 49ers employee had walked into the locker room carrying what appeared to be a bottle of tequila for George. She later learned that the patron was sent from the owner from his suite to George after he requested it. Rossini added the bottle had been empty.

[D]

Whoa. The guy downed a bottle of tequila potential.

[C]

Or it was just an empty bottle of tequila. I don't know.

[A]

That's gonna be a rough next day, though.

[D]

Well, it was gonna be anyway.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Torn Achilles and a brutal hangover.

[B]

We're not gonna get out of bed anyway, so why not?

[A]

Oh, God. Wow. That's rough.

[C]

A 10 year old farm boy took home the top prize in the Pennsylvania Farm Show Mullet contest.

[D]

Nice.

[C]

Drew Fleshett of Dallas, Pennsylvania.

[D]

That's where I'm from.

[C]

Was crowned the winner in this year's competition. They evaluated participants for the style of their cut any props or accessories used their presentation and of course their overall sense of color commitment.

[B]

All right.

[A]

Did it take a good whiff of him to see if he smelled like tobacco?

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

The fabulous mullet.

[B]

Do we have a picture of this kid?

[A]

Yeah, it's. It's sad.

[C]

It's something else sad.

[D]

I bet the kid loves it. It's sad.

[C]

Why is it sad?

[B]

He won a competition. He's happy.

[C]

Well, business up front, party in the back.

[D]

Won a case of red man chewing tobacco. Yeah, he did.

[C]

What's the. What's the slang for the.

[D]

Oh, there are a few. I always like the Missouri Compromise. The Missouri Kentucky waterfall.

[C]

Oh, yeah, I like that.

[A]

Do we have a picture of this kid?

[C]

Kentucky waterfall.

[A]

I got a song if you'd like one.

[C]

Wait for the mullet.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

Mullet winner. Okay. Yeah.

[D]

That's a rad kid.

[C]

There we go. Yeah. Tap out.

[D]

T shirt.

[C]

Mullets come, come and go, don't they? They're about due to come back in. Or maybe they are back in and have gone back out and I missed the whole thing. I don't know.

[A]

Yeah, the most famous one, I think would be, like, Billy Ray Cyrus a few years back. He had the one. And David. David Bowie had the red one back in the Ziggy Stardust era.

[D]

Don't you kind of feel like they weren't a joke until somebody just decided to make them a joke?

[A]

Much maligned.

[D]

All of a sudden, mullets were like. All of a sudden, mullets were awful.

[C]

Well, they were everywhere. Seinfeld had a pretty good mullet. Yeah.

[D]

A lot of those comedians in the 80s and stuff. Players, of course.

[A]

The hockey thing. Yeah, they were. Paul McCartney had one.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

In the Wings days. Wings Over America. He had one.

[E]

Yeah. Yeah.

[D]

Did anybody here have one? Yo, you had one, Jeff. Yeah, but I had one curly hair, so it just looked like a bowl of pubes hanging off the back of my neck.

[C]

Is that right?

[D]

Pull it off the way I want.

[A]

To make it sound so attractive. Pat, you have a mullet attribute. Can we come back with that? Yeah, we could.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

Right now we got a tribute to the. To the break room. It's Java House. Java House is taken over. They're the official beverage service of the Bob and Tom Show. And of course, the. I guess the heart of every business is the break room. We call it the green room here, and we like to keep it stocked with Java House. It's not just coffee, by the way. Hydration drinks, energy drinks, lattes, fancy coffees, hot cocoa, tea, et cetera, et cetera. This could revolutionize your break room, too, because you don't need any machinery. You just peel and pour. You take these little pods and you peel and pour. Add a little bit of water, hot or cold, whatever you're doing, and voila, you've got your coffee, your tea, your latte, et cetera, et cetera. Visit javahouse.com to find out what we're talking about. Variety of easy peel and pour pods to make the coffee room that much easier and more delightful and more delicious. All your break room needs are on hand. Hot and cold water is all you need. So don't have a break room breakdown shop at Java house. Go to javahouse.com it's the official beverage of the Bob and Tom Show. Coming up, we'll get some music from the Duke Tomato Trio, and we'll get a song from Patty G about the world of mullets. Also, as we have some new dictionary words, something new from the world of Lego. And I thought it was a sex marathon when I saw the headline that I realized it was a sax marathon.

[D]

Oh, that's okay.

[A]

Thanks.

[D]

Pointing to those.

[A]

Yeah. Thanks, Guinness. These are the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show. Get ready for the Rush with Max Crosby. It's time. Don't miss the behind the scenes moments.

[D]

Everyone'S talking about, regardless of what they say.

[C]

I'll take the.

[A]

Fine. I don't care. All pro defensive end Max Crosby takes you beyond the field with exclusive insights.

[C]

I could say this because I played them.

[A]

This is the Rush.

[D]

You guys already know what time it is.

[C]

It was fire.

[A]

And we'll be right back on the pod and we'll be talking about it next week. The Rush with Max Crosby. Follow and listen on your favorite platform.

[C]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom show. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts studios. Thank O'Reilly Auto Parts for all your car care needs. Get the parts and service you need fast from the professional parts people at O'Reilly Auto Parts. There's Christy Lee.

[B]

Hey, Chick.

[C]

She's at the SILAC Insurance news desk. There's Pat Godwin.

[E]

Hey, Chick.

[C]

Hello, Pat.

[E]

Hello, Chick.

[C]

How are you?

[A]

Good. How about you?

[C]

You got a song?

[A]

I do.

[C]

Champion chomping at the B. There's Jeff Oski.

[D]

That's right.

[C]

That's right.

[A]

There's.

[C]

There's Josh Arnold. Hello, Ace Cosby. I'm Chick mcgee and hello, Tom.

[A]

Hello, Chick. In the background, you hear the house band today? It's the Duke Tomato Trio. We're getting another song out of these guys in a second, but first we're gonna get a song out of Patty G. Duke. We'll get back to you in just a second. Pat, what's going on over there? Now you got the story. What was it again? Oh, this is the mullet.

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

Let me, let me. You want to give the. Give the story again, Chick. It's involved some.

[C]

It was a mullet contest, actually in Dallas, Pennsylvania, the home of me. Oh, boy, I wish we could have that on the. You're now entering Dallas, Pennsylvania, home of.

[E]

Wouldn't that be cool?

[B]

Yeah, that would be nice.

[D]

They don't care.

[A]

That had to be very confusing.

[D]

Founded by the same guy.

[A]

Leo Dallas. Yeah. You tell people you're from Dallas and Dallas, Texas?

[B]

No, wait a minute.

[C]

Leo Dallas founded Dallas, Texas and Dallas, Pennsylvania.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

What? He stopped one and then go the other?

[D]

No, I don't know the story behind it.

[A]

Yeah, good story.

[D]

So the.

[A]

This, this kid in down.

[C]

Don't say that to him. Now, he's going to be crushed.

[A]

So this, this kid, he wins the best mullet contest and.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. What was the prize?

[C]

I don't think it said preemptive bail.

[A]

Money for his dui Honorary ged.

[C]

Well, we certainly have some preconceived notions about nice folks.

[D]

Or nice 10 year old farm boy.

[A]

Yeah, he's always 10 years old.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. These are your two future ex wives.

[C]

A 10 year old farm boy.

[A]

So Pat, you have a tribute to this kid.

[E]

If you cut it in the front, it's a mullet.

[D]

Keep it long and growing down your back.

[E]

If you get one, you'll get teased with the mullet. If you play hockey, then you get a pass. Did I read today that a kid from Paul won a farm show contest with his hair like a carny? Funny. But now he's stuck like that at his school with a mullet.

[D]

He has to sit like that for.

[E]

Weeks in class A Joe Dirt look alike whose time has passed. Looking like a booger eating hill jackass. Wow.

[A]

It's my hometown.

[E]

I can get harsh. Right?

[C]

There you go. Oh yeah, I like that song. Two thumbs up.

[B]

His hair's cute. It's cute. Yeah, it's got beautiful hair.

[D]

Boys until they're like 13 are allowed to have any silly haircut they want.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

Didn't you have a couple terrible haircuts when you were a kid?

[D]

Yes.

[C]

Are you kidding me? Go ahead, say the word. When you were a kid.

[D]

Rat tail.

[C]

Rat tail.

[D]

That I could almost get all the way around. Whoa.

[C]

Yeah. Sir.

[A]

Was it braided?

[D]

No, it was just naturally curly.

[C]

Damn right it was.

[D]

My grandpa and my dad were furious.

[A]

How long?

[D]

Hated it.

[E]

How long did you have it?

[D]

Too long. They were well out of fashion when I still had mine.

[B]

Well, you had to grow that.

[A]

How old were you?

[D]

Or nine. You know, something like that.

[B]

Was it an attachment or did you grow it?

[D]

Oh, I grew it. Yeah. Yeah. It was disgusting.

[A]

Did you ever have the. The so called Princeton.

[B]

Princeton?

[C]

I did not. I don't know.

[A]

That was a crew cut. Except in the front you had like a little.

[C]

No, we had to get tiny pompadour.

[D]

Oh, okay. Yeah. The classic like duck bill.

[B]

I thought that was called a duck bill.

[A]

Well, the da. The duck's ass in the back where it comes.

[C]

I had to get my hair cut really short for football every from freshman to senior year. So I didn't really. And then we grew really long.

[D]

If my mom took us or cut our hair because she did that a lot too. We kind of got whatever we wanted. If my dad took us, it was crew cuts.

[C]

Crew cuff.

[A]

Well.

[C]

Oh, a lot. Sergeant Carter. Yeah.

[A]

Is that sports?

[C]

No, we've got one more fabulous true testament of the human spirit. Stupid world record. A Portuguese musician. Oh, maybe there are Portuguese musicians.

[D]

A Portugal. The man. Yeah.

[C]

Oh, yeah. He's broken the Guinness world record for the longest marathon playing a saxophone.

[D]

Oh, boy.

[C]

Elvis Nunez Sousa.

[A]

Oh, wait a minute.

[D]

Any relations?

[C]

You'll have to ask Tom. He's in charge of this.

[A]

So he's got the last name of John Philip Sousa and the first name. Elvis.

[C]

Elvis Nunez Sousa.

[A]

Wow. It covers a lot of bases.

[C]

Achieved a record title after playing the sacks for a total of 33 hours, beating the previous record of 26 hours, 23 minutes. The attempt included repeating a repertoire of songs of 73 songs, including there He.

[D]

Goes, Jerry Rafferty Again.

[C]

The Pink Panther theme song, and playing pieces from Louis Armstrong and Barbra Streisand.

[D]

They were both in. Hello. Dowley, right?

[C]

Yeah. Does Barbara Streis. Oh, I think Guilty has a sax solo. Yeah.

[A]

Who knows?

[D]

Pink Floyd's got some good sax solos.

[C]

Get a load of this. For every hour of playing, he was allotted a break of five minutes. And the musician averaged four hour sets to accumulate his rest time into 20 minute blocks.

[D]

Okay, gotcha.

[A]

You gotta stay. You gotta stay awake the whole time.

[C]

So every four hours, really? He took a 20.

[D]

I bet his net their neighbors did too.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Not. They didn't choose.

[A]

Well, they show. I was looking at the video. There's, you know, 20 people and two people and three watching this thing.

[B]

Just as well.

[C]

See, but this is a good time. You don't want to.

[A]

You know.

[C]

The best sex solo in rock history.

[A]

Again, when I. When I saw the story that I. I thought it said sex marathon, so.

[D]

Yeah, so did that couple that showed up, they were mad. How many reads is that, do you think? You would have to change reads at some point.

[A]

We would have to ask our residents.

[D]

Be a soggy.

[C]

Right.

[A]

Let's get hooked up there with the Duke Tomato Trio. Jay Young, saxophonist is right there. Jay, if you heard this, this guy played the saxophone 33 hours. Would you go through more than one read, do you think? What?

[D]

He said he would. Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. Okay. All right. Also on the sacks, Neil Broker. Right there we've got Kent Hickey on the Trouble. How about a tune from you guys, Duke? You got one that features this great horn section.

[E]

Got a bunch of them.

[A]

What do you want?

[E]

What are you up for?

[A]

I don't know. You're the boss.

[D]

What are we up for? We could be in bed. What are we interested in hearing? I see.

[E]

We could do I can't Find My Shoes.

[A]

Okay, well, let's go for it.

[D]

No, he's just saying that he doesn't.

[A]

He's barefoot.

[E]

Very funny, Joshua. Got a dress on and I can't find my shoe Baby got a dress on and I can't find my shoe she's ready to go and I can't find my shoe look under the couch by the bathroom door in the hallway in the bedroom floor I can't find her can't find my shoe Ready to go when I can't find in my shoe I got a clean shirt in my dress pants I thought I might have had a chance for romance if I find them I can't find my.

[A]

Shoe.

[E]

She'S ready to go and I can't find my shoe I say help, help, help, help, help me, please Help, help, help, help, help me, please.

[A]

Red.

[E]

Cold and I can't find my shoes. She's always late that being said I hear about these she shoes till the day I'm dead I can't find them I can't find my shoes Baby ready to go and I can't find my shoe I say why my blue but, baby, it's you Doom I have looked in every room I can't find it I can't find my shoe There you go. And I can't find my shoe Papa doom the. Ready to go and I can't find my shoes Baby got a dress on and I can't find my shoe Baby got her dress on and I can't find my shoe she's ready to go when I can't find my shoe. Have you seen my keys?

[D]

All right. Yes.

[A]

The new Jermaino Trio. I love that one.

[D]

Duke, you know what that song's actually about?

[A]

What's that about?

[D]

Erectile dysfunction.

[A]

Oh, it is the song.

[D]

It's a metaphor for not being able to get it up. When she's ready to go oh, she's got her dress on she's all good.

[E]

She's all set Josh, you should know.

[D]

Yes. Yeah.

[A]

Well, very.

[D]

I cannot get a boner. Well, that's.

[A]

That'd be a good title for a ballad. Can you imagine? Can you imagine a slow.

[C]

I'm somewhat of a loner.

[A]

We're doing it right here. Both Jeff and I really like. Hey, Duke. I love that little scat thing in.

[D]

The middle of that.

[A]

That.

[E]

Shoe. Doom. That's Little Richard, man.

[A]

It was great, though. It made me Happy. That was great. That was great. The do Tomato Trio. And by the way, today, featuring the famous Brath to Mouth. Did I say brath? Sorry, you did. I may have to go to Decaf the Brass to Mouth horns.

[C]

J.

[A]

Young, Neil Broker, and Kent Hickey on. On the trumpet. I understand Hickey is actually a nickname. Apparently the.

[B]

They have a lot of fun.

[A]

And, well, it's got. When you got Trump. When you got trumpet lips, you can apply Hickey and a lady.

[C]

Hey, Trumpet lips, come over here. I'm talking to you, Trumpet lips.

[A]

Judging by Ken's response, this will be his last appearance. I was kidding. Now we've got Christy Lee over there. Yeah, you do the. At the news. Before we get that, we were talking about haircuts and mullets. Does anybody remember something called Butch Wax? Anybody?

[D]

Only from you referencing it.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

Okay. Never heard of it before.

[A]

You butch whack Pat. Did you ever. No, I never did it, but I've heard of it. It. You. If you had a. A crew cut and they'd leave a little. A little on the front and you would wax it up. Yeah, it was like. It was like a. It was like a. Like a candle.

[D]

It's like a pomade that they call it now.

[A]

And I'm. I'm not sure if Butch wax was the actual name of it, but that's what we called it. Did you use it Briefly, Yeah. There was a time when there was hair up there.

[B]

Well, you used to have hair down to your shoulders.

[A]

Yeah, I know, but I mean right in the front there.

[C]

Don't hassle me, man.

[D]

Yeah, you can't find it now. At least on Amazon you can get something. The closest you can get is Lucky Tiger Crew, Butch and Control Wax. But otherwise, pomade's out the wazoo.

[A]

And a crew cut was called a butch haircut.

[D]

Oh, was.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

And my sister to this day calls.

[D]

Me that because of the crew cut. Yeah, well, you can. There's a painting of you, and you have that absolute hairstyle where you. Did you use butch wedge backs, I guess wax, rather.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

But I. As I recall, it was kind of like a chapstick.

[E]

Yeah, that's exactly what it was like.

[A]

But that kind of. But yeah, I'll have to see if it was.

[B]

If that came in a tube and you'd roll it up and then.

[A]

Yeah, I think in a tin. Like a round tin. I remember. And especially when the Beatles came along, hair became a very big thing. Sure. And of course, there was the great stage play. Hair did you ever do that one? No, no.

[E]

There's nudity in that one.

[A]

I was wondering if you.

[D]

Full frontal Male.

[C]

Right.

[D]

Wang's a Plenty. That was the working title.

[B]

Why did they have to get naked if it's a movie about hair?

[A]

Hey, shut up.

[D]

There's hair down there.

[A]

Because they wanted people to read about it and write about it. Why? This the same reason they do things like that in today's world.

[D]

Now, I was surprised at the full frontal nudity and Seussical, although Theodore Geisel had his way.

[A]

Maybe.

[C]

And it worked in Avenue. Avenue Q to.

[D]

It worked.

[A]

Yeah. Well, now, coming up, we're going to get some more great music out of the Duke Tomato Trio. I should point this out. Wildy theater in Edwardsville, Illinois. Thursday, Saturday the 24th, a couple shows at the famous Jazz Kitchen. Friday the 30th, the Temple Theater in Des Moines. The 6th of Feb, it's Kingston Mines in Chicago. Always a great time, both Friday and Saturday, February 6 and 7. Now coming up in the news, Christy Lee.

[B]

Coming up, we have Legos in the news with Pokemon involved. And we also have a bunch of new words. We never got to these earlier. The Cambridge Dictionary has added some really interesting words to their database and we'll go over those. And we have a fight at a trampoline park.

[A]

Okay. And I'll put this in the form of a question. What's going to be more expensive? The Pokeman, Lego, or a really good seat to the IU game in Miami? Coming up, the answer maybe. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show. This is the Bob and Tom Show. Reach us toll free at 1-88-8-BOB- tom1.

[D]

[e-mail] this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[C]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. There is Christy Lee.

[A]

Hello.

[C]

She's at the SILAC Insurance newsroom. There's Pat Godwin.

[A]

Hello.

[C]

Jeff Oskay.

[D]

Yeah, man.

[C]

Hi. Josh Arnold. He's at the ih. Steven Singer, sidekick, chair. There's Ace Cosby.

[D]

Hey, chick.

[C]

I'm Chick McGee. At the prize pick sports desk, you simply pick two to six players, choose more or less and watch your lineups light up for the playoffs. Download prize picks and use the code Tom and get $50 bonus credit instantly when you play. $5. Must be present in certain states. Visit PricePicks.com for restrictions and details.

[A]

Here's Tom and you know me. I'm not president in any State. I gotta get focused to remember that I'm alive. Here I am. Hello. That's the sound of the Duke Tomato Trio with the brass to mouth horns about to hit the road. Duke's got a new project out there as well. We're gonna get a song out of Duke here in a few minutes with Pat Godwin on the vocals. Which gives me an opportunity to mention Patty G. Is going to be on the road. Coming up at the Creek Clubhouse in Charlotte. Is that this Friday night?

[E]

This Friday night, yeah.

[A]

The 16th. Very nice to know. Greg Hahn and Willie G at the Caravan in Louisville, Thursday, Friday and Saturday. And Kostakia Khanomopoulos, who's going to be our guest in just a few minutes. He's going to be doing his thing in Stockton, California. And is it Cozad, Nebraska? We'll find out when we talk to Kostaki in just a few minutes. Duke, let's get. Let's change it up here for just a second. There we go. We're gonna. Now, Pat, are you prepared to. Oh, we're never prepared.

[E]

That's why it's good, Tom. It's off the cuff.

[D]

It's fun.

[A]

Now, this is an interesting thing because this is a song about bedwetting. Yeah. Of all things. And Tough thing for kids. It's real tough for kids.

[D]

I went through it. Yeah.

[A]

And you hear the horror stories about, you know, the mom hanging the yellow sheets in the breeze. And as the school bus goes by and humiliating the kids. It's a tough problem.

[D]

The parents out there, just so you know. That only makes it worse.

[B]

Yeah, absolutely.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

You can't shame your child out of being a bedwetter.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

It's.

[A]

It's rough. And now what? But what's the technical name for it? Nocturnal enuresis. Nocturnal enuresis. And that's something you. I'm sorry. Okay. And you dealt with this as a kid? Oh, I did indeed.

[E]

Yeah.

[D]

That was my blues as a white man. That was my blues growing up. So I'd like to have one of those typical I woke up this morning riffs from Duke. Give me.

[A]

Give me the key of A.

[D]

Yeah, one of those.

[A]

Perfect.

[D]

Yeah. Let's get the band going, too. Yeah.

[A]

That'S it. Pick it up. There.

[E]

Sounded better. I woke up this morning Something was.

[A]

A mess.

[E]

My mattress was ruined Soaking in my own piss Electric blanket was plugged in the moisture blew a spark I looked out the window Found the neighborhood was dark I got the nocturnal. The nocturnal. And Euresus blows.

[D]

Oh, tell him, dude.

[E]

Oh, it's a bummer when you're nine. Oh, I'm undateable at 52. Let me hear you, Duke.

[D]

Take it for a while.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[D]

That'S right. That makes me want to pee my bed right now.

[A]

Tinkle for me, Duke. Tinkle.

[D]

I got the plastic sheets, baby. All right.

[E]

I'll take it from here, fellas.

[A]

Yellow jacket, Godwin.

[D]

All right, here we go.

[E]

I can't sleep over at a friend's house like Chickatami G. I'm afraid I'll wake up in the Sea of Tranquility. I called up my buddy Josh.

[A]

Hey, Pat.

[E]

Cause I was feeling blue and Josh said when he gets drunk, he's a bed wetter, too. I got the nocturnal. It's a night, baby. And Ulysses blows.

[D]

Oh, I got the yellow so bad.

[E]

Undainable at 50am Cold, wet, and all alone at 62. Take it home.

[A]

We're done.

[D]

Now I'm gonna take a shower. Oh.

[A]

For an hour.

[C]

Very much. Thank you very much.

[A]

Live from Yellow Creek, it's Patty G. That was great, Duke. Thank you, Pat. And yeah, it's a. It's a sad thing. If you've got it, you got to deal with it. And, you know, there are ways to help you out. So if that's something you're dealing with.

[D]

You'Ll get through it.

[A]

God bless you. You'll get through it.

[D]

You sure will.

[A]

But at the time, you don't think you're going to get.

[D]

And you're not alone. Remember, you're not alone.

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

Oh, wow.

[A]

Now, that was the Duke Tomato Trio. And people often go, is your show recorded? Are you kidding? You guys fell right in. That was awesome. Thank you very much, Duke. Now it's time to switch gears and head over to Christy Lee. She's over there at the Silicon Insurance news desk. What's happening?

[B]

Lego and Pokemon have revealed the new sets in their first ever collaboration. It includes a 200 Pikachu jumping out of a Pokeball. That'll be about 2,050 pieces. Man, that's bigger than any puzzle I've ever put together. What's the biggest LEGO you've ever put together?

[D]

I don't know. That's a good question.

[B]

What about Sam?

[A]

Oh, yeah. He's got all the big stars.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

During COVID we got about half of the Disney Castle done, then he took it over.

[B]

Oh, he did? He finally finished it for you?

[A]

Yeah, yeah. But the. Then the thing is, how much are these things? Does it say.

[B]

Yeah, this was $200. And I. We remember, we brought this up.

[A]

Before.

[B]

And people keep them, they save them. They don't take them apart and put them back together again. They're like a. Yeah, they're like a sculpture.

[C]

They have a display. Display shelves and everything.

[A]

Yeah, I know.

[B]

There's the $60 figure of. Is it Eevee? A $650 set that features the characters of Venezueir, Charizard and Blastoise. That's 6,838 pieces.

[A]

And wasn't the. Was it the Death Star one? That was a thousand bucks.

[D]

It must have been. Yeah, it was up there.

[B]

They're available for pre order right now and officially launch on February 27th.

[A]

Attention Virgin nerds with money. Wait a minute. That's my son Sam.

[B]

He's not a virgin and he's married.

[A]

Now, but he loves he sexless marriage. He loves these things.

[B]

He does, doesn't he? Does he have a room dedicated to LEGO sets?

[A]

I mean, if you walk into Sam's house and you say you're carrying a cup of coffee.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

There's nowhere to put it down. Oh, because there's stuff. Well, it's everywhere.

[C]

Sounds. Sounds lovely.

[A]

I. I can't be in the room because I can't stand clutter. So it drives me crazy.

[B]

Really?

[C]

Are you concerned about knocking something over?

[A]

No, I'm concerned about just. Just too much stuff.

[C]

Really?

[D]

It is busy in there. Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

I, I don't like too much stuff.

[D]

Some of the stuff's cool.

[A]

Oh, it's cool. It just, I. It just, I get.

[D]

Hey, where'd you get this skull? Because he's got. His wife has like a lot of sort of gothic Y things. Yeah.

[A]

I assume it's not a real skull.

[D]

I didn't get a nose.

[C]

Well, assume all you want.

[D]

I didn't get what I felt was a. An acceptable answer.

[A]

Well, yesterday on the show, can you buy a skull?

[C]

Like a black market.

[B]

We talked about that.

[C]

There was a guy.

[A]

Absolutely. All right, we had the story yesterday. I got it right here. They arrested this guy. This story is just gruesome.

[D]

Oh yeah.

[A]

This guy's a ghoul, 34 year old man. I mean, I don't even want to honor him by saying his name. Following a series of break ins at the Mount Mariah Cemetery in Pennsylvania, 26 mausoleums had been forced open since November. A search of this guy's home and a storage unit. They found 100 human skulls, mummified hands, decomposing torso. The list goes on. And it gets worse.

[D]

Most were in his home. Only like eight of the Bodies were in a storage unit.

[C]

Why?

[D]

I don't know.

[B]

Whoa. I wonder what he was doing with him.

[D]

Yeah. We still don't know.

[A]

No.

[D]

Really grizzly dive on that could have been making love to them.

[B]

Yeah. You think?

[D]

I'm just saying, I think that's number.

[C]

One on the hit parade. There was.

[D]

That's really.

[C]

You're not gonna make a puppet out of it and talk to it.

[B]

Well, you could sell parts like. But that would be.

[A]

That would be illegal. No, no, the whole thing. I know.

[B]

Well, we had that story, what, last week.

[C]

That.

[A]

That was a famous story out of Harvard University. The guy that was involved in the selling off of.

[B]

After they'd used.

[A]

Yeah. The medical cadavers. He was selling chunks of them. It's just awful.

[D]

Do you guys. Any plans to donate your bodies to.

[A]

Science after reading this? I don't know.

[D]

Well, this is.

[B]

I'm an organ donor, but I don't think I do my body.

[D]

I think I will.

[B]

Really?

[D]

Yeah. Yeah. Or as Rodney Dangerfield once said, I donated my body to science fiction. Very good show.

[A]

Are you an organ donor?

[D]

I am, yes.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

Take it all. Take whatever you want.

[A]

Yeah. To get back to that, I'm sorry to do this, but that first episode of the Pit where he's driving the motorcycle without a helmet.

[D]

Right.

[A]

I'm kind of wondering if that's going to lead to something about organ donation.

[D]

Oh, I don't know.

[A]

And I think that.

[B]

Or the hard to donate your brain.

[D]

Yeah, the brain transplant, they have not perfected yet.

[C]

But I mean, you know what, though? They've gotten really, really. Well, no, it's not that close either, now that I think about it.

[A]

Okay. Well, now, coming up, we've got the Duke Tomato Trio hanging out with us. Also in the news, we've got Christy Lee with some more cool stories, including new words in the dictionary. A couple of them are kind of valid. Couple of them are.

[C]

A couple are kind of valid.

[B]

He likes a couple of these.

[A]

Yeah. But a couple of them I think are bogus. The one that I really like is Ghost Charging. That's pretty valid. I'm not sure.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

Thrift tripping. Makes me want to punch somebody. Now, coming up, we're also going to talk with our NFL correspondent, the very handsome Kostaki economopoulos. From the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios, this is the Bob and Tom Show. Thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom Show.

[D]

Sponsored in part by Java House, the official coffee and refreshments of the Bob and Tom Show.

[C]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and top show. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios at the Silac Insurance news desk. It's Christy Lee.

[B]

Hello.

[C]

There's Pat Godwin.

[E]

Hey, Chick.

[C]

There's Jeff Oskay.

[D]

Only got one letter on wordle today.

[C]

One letter?

[D]

One letter and six lines. That's the worst showing ever.

[C]

Wow.

[A]

I haven't done it yet. Give me a break here.

[C]

Sorry. There's Josh Arnold.

[D]

Hi.

[C]

He's at the I hate Steven Singer sidekick chair. There's Ace Cosby. Hello, I'm Chick at the prize pick sports desk. Hello, Tom.

[A]

Was it a vowel?

[C]

Busy day.

[A]

The one you got. Okay, good. Yes.

[B]

Oh, was the word zazu or something?

[D]

Has penis been a word yet? No, I don't think so.

[C]

Sugar.

[D]

Oh, it's not five.

[C]

Hey, Tom. It's sugar.

[B]

Oh, it has five letters. I guess. I don't know how.

[C]

No, it's not. No, I'm teasing.

[A]

Don't screw around with world, my friend.

[D]

We're gonna have to do penis at some point.

[B]

It's five letters, right?

[E]

It's five letters.

[A]

I don't think they will.

[B]

Why not?

[C]

Why wouldn't they do penis?

[D]

It's anatomical. I mean, they're.

[B]

It's not a bad word.

[C]

And they're using medical terms. They wouldn't use 5 letters for a lady if it sl. 2 ladies.

[D]

Is there dirty wordle out there?

[C]

Oh, I'm sure there has to be. Yeah.

[D]

Turtle.

[A]

Turtle. Dirty wordle. Well, let's. Let's move on here. That's the sound of the Duke tomato trio augmented by the brass to mouth horns. We'll hear some music from them in just a second. But right now we're going to shift gears. We're going to hit the satellite. Thank you very much, Duke. We're going up to the satellite and there we. There he is. It's Kostakia Konamopoulos.

[D]

Mouth to mouth horns is funny.

[E]

I never heard that.

[A]

Now, Kostaki, did you watch the game last night?

[D]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

That's.

[D]

Yeah. I'm not a big Aaron Rogers fan, so I enjoyed it very much.

[B]

Oh, well, Tom is a big.

[A]

I wanted to see him. I just like it.

[C]

See the old guys see it.

[A]

Old guys do.

[C]

Well, that somehow translates to me and I could almost do it.

[D]

We. Yeah, that's exactly right.

[A]

That's exactly right. I especially liked his comments about all of the. The enlightened commentators that seem to know everything about football.

[D]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

Well, this headline from the Onion this morning concerning Mr. Rogers. Numerous teams express interest in Aaron Rodgers playing elsewhere.

[D]

We've done it. Is good. They don't miss. They don't miss often.

[C]

We've gone through this Aaron Rodgers thing. Where is he playing?

[A]

What's he gonna do with his contract?

[B]

Who knows?

[C]

Knows for like nine years. It's insane.

[D]

Yeah, it is a long time. You're right.

[A]

Anything. Anything to keep the NFL top in mind is the way they do it.

[D]

That's right.

[A]

Hey, Stocking, what's all this stuff with the Achilles lately? It seems like it's.

[C]

Suddenly Tom thinks it's a. Some sort of.

[A]

Some kind of a trend. Are they. Are they. Are the players not stretching enough? What's going on? Why are.

[D]

That's a good question. And if you're Achilles, you got to be pissed. That the only cultural references to those one weakness, right? Yeah. I did a lot, guys. Just because I did a lot. My mom didn't dunk the bottom of my leg. I know. I'm a feared, incredible warrior.

[C]

Go ahead. No try to stab.

[A]

No.

[D]

Achilles bicep.

[C]

That's right.

[D]

Pec muscle. No. It's my one weak spot. It's BS and then Kittle reportedly drank an entire bottle of tequila in the locker room after each.

[A]

Yeah, we saw that. Yeah.

[D]

So half as much as packers fan Saturday night. You know it's only one bottle. Just the one. Somewhere in Philly, there's a public works guy. Sad that the Eagles lost, but thrilled he doesn't have to grease 486 light poles.

[A]

True enough.

[D]

Coach Sirianni had to defend yelling at his star wideout on the sideline. It's like, that's just how we show love here in Philly. I don't expect you outsiders to understand next time you'll judge me for stealing his cheesesteak and banging his girl. That's Philly. It's Philly. I love that guy. The Falcons hired Matt Ryan to be. Did you see this phrase, Chick?

[C]

I love it.

[D]

President of football.

[C]

President. I am president of football.

[D]

That is great.

[A]

What does that mean? Is that the general manager?

[C]

Hey, hey. It means just what it sounds like.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

He's the president of football.

[A]

Okay.

[D]

Sounds like a title. Granted in a treehouse.

[E]

It does.

[C]

Okay.

[D]

You're the president of football. You're the president of snacks.

[C]

Yep.

[D]

You're the president of Wiffle Ball. You know, no matter what your politics are, it does kind of sound like something our president would decide. He is.

[B]

Yeah, you're right.

[D]

You know what? I'm president of football.

[A]

And Venezuela.

[C]

People are saying that. People are saying I should do it. People are saying it do.

[D]

Sounds so made up. Yeah, it sounds like a title given to a. Make a wish kid for the weekend. You're the president of football. No, there's a certain respect that somebody. Why not the. Tries to mine comedy from that. Yeah, that's right.

[A]

A bold move.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

You know, we'll.

[A]

We'll forward the letters to you.

[D]

Yeah, please. All right. This one too.

[A]

Why.

[D]

Why not the Grand Prix poobah of football? As long as you're making stuff up.

[A]

Right?

[D]

Right. Why not the Grand Wizard? All right, that's probably not a good one. He's heckling himself. It doesn't seem like the president of football would work for the Atlanta Falcons. Right, That's. That's more of a place for the disgrace that recently fired regional manager of football president of football position only appointed by Johnny Football. All right. Brian's gonna oversee the GM and the head coach.

[C]

I.

[D]

Is it. I think it's time to hire a robot as a coach. Right. The ultimate analytics guy. Siri, it's 3rd and 10. Yes. Again.

[B]

What.

[D]

What should we do here? Help us out, Alexa. Time for a flea flicker. Right? We could have a. I don't. There wasn't a touchdown of the Pat's Chargers game until halfway through the third quarter. Nobody could score. It was like Comic Con. It's like a mixer for computer programmers. Not a lot of score.

[A]

No sex you see there? Unattractive nerds.

[D]

Yeah, that's right. Support group for people with low self esteem. This is very little scoring. The playoffs are, of course, to see who gets to play the super bowl in San Francisco. Well, not San Francisco. About an hour south. Santa Clara. Not. Not even an NFL team can afford to live in San Francisco. The Niners could join the Miami Hurricanes in hosting the big championship game in their home stadium. But the Niners are like a MASH unit at this point. They got more injuries than Mr. Magoo in a slaughterhouse. Wow.

[A]

As someone who Magoo's around, I know how that would be. Oh, dear God. Is that a band saw? There goes my hand.

[D]

The Bills O line carried Josh Allen for 10 yards. It's only fair. Josh has been carrying them for years.

[A]

Right?

[D]

All right, here we go. This is how I know dogs are better than cats. Because when his teammates talk about Josh Allen, they say he's a dog. When bragging about another player, no one ever says he's a cat. He's. He's disinterested in you. He's aloof and weird, and he'll show you his ass. He's a cat. Bill's beat the Jag. So Jacksonville ordered that all strippers be flown at half pole. The close game in Chicago. The tension was thicker than the pizza and almost as likely to give you a heart attack. The the Bears are succeeding and having a good quarterback. And other news. People in hell got ice water. Bears have a quarterback. This is we. I've never seen this Bears one. Packers fans were stunned. Boy, I hope they don't start drinking a lot. So many teams are interested in John Harbaugh. I wouldn't be surprised. The Ravens interviewed him. Like, that's the best coaching vacancy, right? He's the best coach. It's. It's like you get separated from your wife, you date around, you go back, it's fine.

[B]

Has that ever happened?

[A]

Pina colada football.

[D]

I don't think that's ever happened. Hasn't happened, has it, Chick?

[C]

No, I don't think.

[B]

I can't imagine.

[D]

That would be insane.

[C]

We changed our mind. Come on back. Yeah.

[B]

Just kidding.

[A]

But it's a coach. A coach has gone back, right?

[D]

That's a good question.

[C]

Maybe after I know Josh McDaniel said he would coach and then he.

[A]

And then he.

[D]

Well, the Falcons had interim head coach Raheem Morris, had another coach for a while, and then hired him as their head coach. Okay, that's happened. All right, let's close on this. Cincinnati's defensive back, Cam Taylor. Britt was in jail this week. First time in years the Bengals have had a lockdown called corner.

[A]

Now we're getting. Getting semi. You locked him down.

[C]

Maybe have the first time they've had a locked down corner. No, no. Better.

[D]

Yeah, that's probably.

[E]

Oh, I got booed by.

[D]

Okay. No, I think you're right. I know I'm reacting because I think that's a better way to do the joke. Fair enough. But still fix the joke.

[C]

But still fix the joke, baby.

[A]

I applaud Jake for. For taking it from a D to.

[D]

A C. Chick, here's your salmon as the other pink meat T shirt. Thank you very much.

[A]

I think stocky.

[C]

What are you crazy, baby?

[A]

The tush push I think is BS and it was employed. No, that thing.

[C]

If you saw that play, that Josh Allen and his entire yards of line carried him for 10 yards. It's ridiculous.

[A]

That is B.S.

[C]

We can't have that.

[A]

Are they going to vote on that again or are they going to.

[C]

I hope so.

[A]

Was that enough for them to go, okay, this is a joke, man.

[C]

I don't know what they're going to do. But it's got.

[D]

It's funny. Somebody said a month or so ago it doesn't look like football, which I always dismiss. But that. Really. That lands for me now. It doesn't. That play doesn't look like football. His feet off the ground. They were for a beat.

[C]

Yeah, for sure.

[A]

That's ridiculous.

[D]

Very.

[C]

The only. The only way I would allow it is if you. If Josh is on offense and he's being pushed by his offensive lineman. Am I. I'm on defense and my defense is pushing me into it. Yes. Then I'll allow it.

[A]

But that's ridiculous. No, no. Thank you. Well, Kostaki, it's. Am I correct in saying you're going to be at Valley Brew in Stockton, California, coming up on Friday night?

[D]

Friday night. This Friday, yeah.

[A]

And then on the 17th, which is Saturday night. Is it pronounced Cozad, Nebraska?

[D]

I think so. Yeah. They do. They do a benefit show. They do once a year. Comedy show for like 20 years. And I'm this year's act, so it'll be fun.

[A]

All right. That'll be cool. I know that you're at the comedy cabin in Janesville, Wisconsin, on the 29th. On the 30th. Riverside, Iowa, the Riverside Casino, the 31st, the 1 event venue in Quincy, Illinois.

[D]

Yeah, these are some good gigs. I'm looking forward to getting back out.

[A]

There for some great, great live comedy.

[C]

All right.

[D]

Telling some jokes, marginally Improved by Chick McGee.

[B]

Oh, no, no.

[A]

I think it was a dramatic improvement. When you start in the basement and it gets started so halfway to the landing on your way to the attic.

[D]

He went to jail. He's a quarterback. He was his lockdown corner.

[C]

Tom managed to break both of our hearts at the same time.

[D]

Yeah, that's right.

[C]

Amazing.

[A]

I'm so happy.

[D]

Good job, buddy.

[A]

Stocky, did you watch the IU game on Friday?

[D]

I did. Man, they look good.

[A]

Yeah, that. That's.

[D]

I mean, they're so easy to root for. I hope they win it all. I hope they crush Miami like they did, though, last team. Yeah.

[A]

A lot of people be. I'd like to see the ratings on that regionally.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[D]

I'm interested to see what the ratio of the fan base is in the stadium. Because it's in Miami.

[A]

Yeah, but we heard it was 8020 at the Rose Bowl.

[D]

Is that right? Yeah.

[A]

Friends of ours that were there. Yeah. That's great.

[B]

But obviously Miami was almost the same, if not more.

[A]

Yeah. In Atlanta. So Interesting. Interesting stuff going on in the world of football and we'll look forward to talking to you again the next year. Do you want to make any, do you ever do any predictions? Do you have any. Do you want to look, look ahead a few weeks and say, boy, I, I don't know.

[D]

This year's really, it's. As a fan of football, it's a really interesting, fun year because there's not a super dominant team. There's eight teams that are good and they all have flaws. And I mean, I'm, at this point, I'm rooting for Josh Allen if he's ever going to win one. This is the year, right?

[C]

Yeah, they. Well, they said that last year, but. Yeah, but this year, truly, because Mahomes is out.

[D]

There's no Mahomes, there's no Lamar, there's no Burrow.

[C]

Right.

[D]

Like, go get it, Josh. I mean, the Bills winning it all would be fun. It would be fun, I think.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay, good. Well, thanks, Kostaki. It's always a great pleasure. Great stuff today.

[D]

See you, man. Thanks, guys.

[A]

Except for the last one.

[C]

Hey, speaking of being locked down, wouldn't you be a lockdown corner at home if you had simply say, you're darn right you would. It comes to home security, you want to feel you pick the system that actually keeps trouble away, and that's Simplisafe. That's why I trust and love my Simplisafe home security system. It isn't just another alarm. It's designed to help stop crime before it starts. And we use it here at the Bob and Tom studios. And so easy to set up at home. SimpliSafe uses AI powered cameras outside the home to spot real threats and instantly alert live agents. That's what makes it different from the rest. Those agents actually take action while the intruder is still outside your home. They talk to them through the camera, let them know they're being watched and police are on the way. And if needed, they can blast a siren and light them up with a spotlight. Other systems might give you a camera and a notification, but they need you to see the alert and handle it. Simplisafe's monitoring agents have your back even when you're busy or asleep. And right now, you can get 50% off any new system at Simplisafe this month only. It's a great time to upgrade to security that actually helps stop crime before it starts. Go to simplisafe tom.com that is simply safe. Tom.com and lock in that discount. There's no safe like Simplisafe.

[A]

Thank you very Much shickster. Coming up, we have some new words in the dictionary. We've got some great music from the Duke Tomato Trio. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios, and this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[E]

3.

[C]

Hi. Welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. There's Christine Lee.

[B]

Hello.

[C]

There's Pat Godwin.

[A]

Hey, Chick.

[C]

There's Jeff Osk.

[D]

Yes.

[C]

There's Josh Arnold.

[A]

Hello.

[C]

Ace Cosby. Andy. I'm Chick McGee. And hello, Tom.

[A]

Mr. Jeff Oskay was on vacation last year week and the week before and the week before.

[D]

Yeah, I planned that good.

[E]

Yeah, you did.

[D]

Oh, yeah, man.

[A]

And we're gonna find out about that vacation in just a second. But right now we have the DO Tomato Trio, augmented by the brass to mouth horns. We've got Neil Broeker on the sax, Kent Hickey on the trumpet, and an old friend of the show, Jae Young, also on the sax. But right now, if I'm not mistaken, that black, large thing in his hand, what is a bass clarinet?

[D]

Oh, I see. Yeah.

[A]

You don't see one of those very often. No. Wow, man, that's cool.

[B]

Oh, that Jae Young is playing.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh.

[D]

All right.

[B]

I wouldn't have known. That's fascinating.

[C]

Well, I guess just. I'm just enjoying this. Under the topic of how to bring something screeching home.

[A]

See, you guys have no appreciation for quality instrumentation.

[B]

You're just a horn lover.

[C]

We've got that Buffalo Bills play over the weekend where the offensive line of the Bills carried Josh. Josh Allen for. Not Josh Arnold, but Josh allen for, like, 10 yards. If you'd like to. Like to see that. Sure.

[A]

One second. Hey, Duke. Thanks very much. We're gonna get back to Duke in just a second. Oh, just when we got the trumpet.

[C]

Solo clarinet with all kinds of notes I'd never heard before.

[A]

All right, cool. Yeah, we'll get back to that in a second. We got. This is the controversial.

[C]

That's a contrava. Yes.

[A]

This should not be allowed. Here we go.

[C]

The tush bush.

[A]

Here we go.

[C]

Okay, it looks like he stopped. No, wait a minute.

[E]

Oh, wait a minute.

[D]

Oh, now, that seems fair to me.

[B]

Yeah, that seems fair to me, too.

[D]

That looks like football to me. No, they didn't do anything wrong.

[B]

What?

[C]

Wait a minute. Hold it. Joshua brings up a good point. What?

[D]

They didn't do it.

[C]

They're carrying. I didn't know that.

[B]

Are they carrying him?

[A]

Yeah, look at what. Yes, at one point is both his feet are off the ground.

[C]

Right.

[A]

They.

[B]

I don't even see him anymore. They're all.

[D]

Oh, absolutely. Lift them over that guy. Oh, yeah, like near the end there.

[C]

Boy, I feel like. I feel sorry for the Jaguar at.

[E]

The bottom of the pile.

[D]

I know. It is weird, isn't it?

[C]

Run over. Yeah. Oh, well, they'll figure it out.

[A]

What's next?

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Bring back the flying wedge.

[B]

What's a flying way?

[C]

Yeah, go ahead. Describe that for us.

[A]

They would link arms.

[C]

I don't know if they would link arms. Would they link?

[A]

I think so. Yeah.

[B]

Really?

[A]

But it was on the kickoff when people in any.

[B]

Oh, okay.

[C]

Would die and they'd have a BS play.

[A]

Okay, I'm sorry. Now, we were talking about Mr. Jeff Oscar and stand up comedian and worksheet is great. And you went on a. Yeah.

[C]

Wait a minute, wait a minute. What?

[A]

What?

[C]

After stand up comedian.

[A]

He works here full time.

[C]

Oh, I thought you said. I swear, I thought you said World Series great.

[D]

I. I would feel like we needed to address that.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

That's why I had no idea he pitched two innings for the brewers when they won the World Series.

[A]

That'd be funny if we had a World Series greater. But never asked him about that.

[C]

Yeah, I don't know why that'd be.

[A]

When we had Hugh Jackman in here, by the way, currently featured in this movie called Song Song Blue, which is really cool. Mr. Jackman was in here and he was telling me off the air that his best friend is a DJ in Australia. And he said, he goes, next time I'm around, do you mind if I come in and I'll just be like one of you guys? Instead of talking about the movie, Hugh Jackman stuff, he'll just hang out.

[D]

Yeah. Come on in, baby.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

We'll never see him again.

[C]

Or it'll be, did you Jackman again? Jackman's in the parking lot. Yeah.

[A]

Yes, immediately.

[D]

That'd be way better.

[C]

Hey, Hugh, here's the thing. Why just go around and get us some coffee?

[A]

That'd be fun, wouldn't it.

[C]

Wouldn't it be fun for you?

[A]

At one time, remember we had Bruce Willis on for 10 minutes before we knew it was him. We.

[C]

We didn't believe it was him.

[A]

Yeah. He called up and he didn't say who it was. We were talking to this guy. Yeah. And then it turned out to be Bruce. Anyway, this is a letter I want to read because you just went on a family vacation.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Now, it's my understanding you went with your parents.

[D]

I went with my parents and my brother and My sister in law.

[C]

Wow.

[A]

Okay. And then.

[B]

Oh, and your girl and my lady. Yes.

[A]

Now, were any of your kids there?

[D]

No.

[A]

Oh, wow.

[C]

That's the only way to. Only way to vacation.

[A]

You got back and your house was still standing.

[D]

Yeah, they.

[A]

Is it not flammable?

[D]

We shoved them at the other parents.

[C]

All right.

[A]

This comes to us from someone named Cindy. She writes, I decided to take my kids to Disney World. I dropped down a non refundable outrageous deposit the day before departure. We decided to drive rather than fly due to the fact that everyone was sick. The second day, I became sick. Two days later, three more fallen soldiers, all with respiratory stuff. Then two others went down hard with stomach flu. He goes, by the way. We were spending a thousand bucks a night to do the Disney safari. It was freezing. There were fireworks noises, and all the animals went into the barn. All we saw was an ostrich and an antelope. I should have added my pile of cash to Tom's bonfire for his ski trip with no snow. Now, did your trip go well?

[D]

The trip went well. One night I. Apparently I was drinking Doers. I remember drinking Dewars, but apparently I was also filling in with shots of tequila with my brother. One point. I was apparently on stage with a Queen cover band singing with Freddie Mercury. Nice. After that was over, I went to the disco and came in second place in a Get Low competition, which I don't remember any of. But I heard about the next day when people were like, hey, there's the guy. I was like, yeah.

[A]

How'd you feel the next day?

[D]

Oh, luckily that was a rain day because Jeff didn't get out of bed until 6:30 the next day, in the evening.

[B]

PM.

[D]

Yeah, I am. I don't want anything that tastes like lime. I don't want to smell mint. I don't like strawberry or coconut. I'm done. I'm done drinking. That's how good of a trip.

[C]

That hangover.

[D]

Yeah. You were in.

[A]

What were you?

[D]

Jamaica puta Cana in the Dominican.

[A]

Okay, that. Right next door to Haiti.

[D]

Yes.

[A]

You didn't do like one of the day trips over to Haiti?

[B]

Why would you do that?

[A]

I smell gunpowder.

[D]

Now you know the song Get Low, Tom.

[A]

I was assuming it was the limbo.

[D]

No, this was. This was apparently a twerking competition that I was the only man who joined. Yes. And you came in second. Yeah.

[A]

This is getting.

[B]

You gonna show us your.

[A]

Your moves?

[D]

Apparently I got lower than this. Yeah, but I don't remember.

[A]

So is there a specific Get Low dance?

[D]

Yeah, just kind of that. Like you just. Then you squat and as far as.

[C]

You get low and get low.

[D]

Or twerk.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Oh, yeah. Sounds like something you'd sing when you were crapping in the woods. Now, do they have the legal marijuana in the Dominican Republic?

[D]

No, they do not. But if you find any of the people on the beach selling anything, they also have marijuana.

[A]

Ah, did you?

[D]

Yeah. I mean, yeah. Well, that was the funny thing because my parents are there. My parents are not fans of that. And they were selling my brother cigars and they're like, do you want cigar? And my girlfriend was like, no, we. We do more than marijuana. And the guy goes, oh, let me show you my goods. And just he goes, here, hold the giraffe. Because you know they're trying to sell you a wooden giraffe, so you gotta act like you're looking at the giraffe. And then they get in their bag and get out. I saw a lot more cocaine being sold than weird than weed or alleged cocaine. Yeah, I love beach. Not to me. Not to me.

[C]

Yeah, a lot of people dead end, but that's where the best cocaine is.

[D]

Right off the beach, which I think that little pocket on your jeans, that's what that's for, apparently, because they cut.

[A]

We're tucking beach cocaine. Cut with actual sand.

[B]

Yes. White sandy beach.

[C]

Wow.

[D]

Well, sounds like fun. I'm done drinking. I'm giving up alcohol forever. Yeah. Yeah, it sounded like that was a good drunk, though. It doesn't sound like you did anything bad. You just enjoyed yourself. Yeah, and then vomited for about six hours straight when I got back to the room.

[A]

And what did your girlfriend and think about all that?

[D]

Oh, she thought it was hilarious. Yeah.

[A]

Now, when you land at the Dominican Republic airport, do they have things honoring the great baseball players?

[D]

No, but they do roll up one of those. Like you get out on the tarmac.

[A]

Oh, the stairway.

[D]

Like. Like I was there to see fans.

[A]

The Beatles at Idle Wilds.

[D]

Oh, it was awesome.

[A]

Or was that jfk? I don't know.

[D]

Yeah. So overall, great trip. And everyone came back. Well, my dad didn't. On the flight home, he woke up sick and vomited on two flights non stop the whole way back to America. Yeah.

[A]

Why are you smiling?

[D]

Oh, because I don't know.

[A]

Sorry. Sorry to hear that. Christy Lee is at the news desk. How about a quick story before we get back to some music with Duke?

[B]

Officers from the police departments responded to Nova Adventure Trampoline park in Connecticut Saturday evening. Police were called to break up a fight involving as many as 100 juveniles. Reportedly, most of the crowd dispersed when police arrived.

[A]

Man.

[D]

Yeah, that's a melee.

[A]

Trampoline park.

[B]

Trampoline part.

[A]

You think they'd have a bouncer chick.

[D]

That's a real laughing. I.

[E]

I love it.

[D]

I had not enough bouncers.

[C]

Oh, nice.

[D]

Also chose the same joke.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

Wow.

[C]

Wonderful.

[B]

A story for Pat. A remorseful thief returned instruments that he stole from a New Jersey vintage guitar store with an apology note.

[C]

Sorry.

[B]

Lark Street Music initially shared security footage of the alleged thief stuffing two mandolins valued at $3,540 $4,250 into his parka jacket before leaving.

[A]

Whoops.

[B]

The store said in a recent post that the mandolins had been returned along with a handwritten note that said, sorry, I been drunk. Merry Christmas. You're a good man.

[C]

I've been drunk.

[B]

The matter remains under police investigation. The owner said he tried to chase after the culprit, but lost him and called 91 1.

[D]

To me, that's case closed.

[A]

Yeah, done.

[D]

They're returned as long as they weren't.

[B]

Damaged or anything, right?

[A]

Two mandolin. Talk about making off with the loot.

[C]

The loot. Loot.

[D]

Hey, see, last one. So he thought he could do that. He's empowered now.

[C]

A loot is.

[A]

Is very similar to a mandolin, a stringed instrument. And the. The sound of a loot hitting a chainsaw in a dumpster is just really something. The loot is like, I think you see it.

[D]

One of those.

[A]

One of those Renaissance festivals. And my favorite line about a Renaissance fair comes from Mr. Chick McGee. If you've ever gone to these things, you've got the guys in the costumes and.

[B]

And the ladies.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And the lady.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

But what gives it away?

[C]

Their shoes. You always see a pair of air force ones every now and then. They didn't really have those during the Renaissance, I don't think.

[A]

Yeah, that are the. That are the glasses that just are a little bit too contemporary.

[D]

Well, you know, like in Cable Guy. More Pepsi. Actually, can I get a fork? They didn't have a fork in medieval times, but they had Pepsi.

[C]

But she says, look, dude, I've got a lot of tables.

[A]

That's her best line ever right there.

[C]

Love it.

[A]

Coming up, we're gonna get some more music out of Duke. What have you got? Coming up, Christy Lee.

[B]

Coming up, we still have to get to our word story. We have pork tenderloin in the news.

[A]

Oh, this story is amazing.

[C]

Love the pork tenderloin. Wait till you hear this.

[A]

You don't know what's coming, do you?

[B]

No, he doesn't.

[A]

Oh, you're gonna be. You're gonna love this story. It's just on the way right now. I want to say thanks to Home Serve for helping sponsor the Bob and Tom Show. Much appreciated, Home Serve. A bunch of us here own houses, and I know I spent my entire weekend tweaking this and that.

[C]

We know the delight of owning a home.

[A]

Yeah, you've got insurance in the house, but sometimes that insurance doesn't really come in handy when you have, let's say, a pipe burst upstairs. Oh, hey, why is the ceiling leaking? You got to get on it right away. That's where HomeServe comes in. It's all about that 24. 7 hotline and having someone around that can help you with whatever might take place. And HomeServe is kind of like a subscription for your house. And it begins at just $4.99 a month. And HomeServe will have your back repairs hit fast and hard. As you know, there's someone once said there's nothing worse than water damage. Yes, there is fire damage. Yeah, I'll get back to you now. Why? I know about that. So choose one of the cool plans from HomeServe. Get all the [e-mail] by the way, this is just a couple quick numbers. Four and a half million customers were surveyed about HomeServe that use it. 4.8 out of 5 is their rating. Post repair rating. That's pretty impressive. How about this? The Better business bureau an A plus rating for HomeServ. So get all the details like I [e-mail] save those, protect those home systems and protect your wallet. I guess with HomeServe, once again, you visit HomeServe.com for all the information. It's not available everywhere. See if you qualify. Most plans run between $4.99 a month and $11.99 a month for the first year. So find out all the details, terms of plan covered [e-mail] that's homeserve.com we got some music coming up from Duke. Got some new words in the English language, et cetera, et cetera. From the Aureliano Parts studios, this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[D]

For a complete copy of the Bob.

[A]

And Tom show contest rules, go to bobandtom.com contest rules. Or just scroll down to the bottom.

[D]

Of the page and see contest rules. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[C]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. I'm Chick McGee. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. There's Chrissy Lee.

[E]

Hi.

[C]

He's at the SILAC Insurance news desk. There's Pat Godwin.

[D]

Hello.

[C]

There's Jeff Oskay.

[D]

That's right.

[C]

There's Josh Arnold.

[D]

Hi.

[C]

Ace Cosby.

[E]

Hey.

[C]

I am Chick at the Prize Pick sports desk. Hello, Tom.

[A]

Hello, Chick. McGee. The sound you're hearing. We've got the Duke Tomato Trio, augmented by the brass to mouth horns. Now we're hearing a little bit of flute.

[D]

Yes.

[A]

A little bass clarinet. And a little bit of trumpet. That's right. Little bit of musical education for you.

[D]

Sounds.

[B]

You know, your horns. I'm impressed.

[A]

We're gonna check in with Duke, who's, by the way, gonna be in the road here. Duke, I want to favor us with a tune. What do you got in mind here, Duke?

[E]

Well, my sister was a stripper and my brother. Never mind. Yeah. This is another song. You want to hear this?

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

Yeah. You up. Leather get slick, rubber get squeaky. Let's go to Tom's garage and get real freaky.

[A]

I watch my tiger go get that on my car.

[E]

I won't tie you up. I want tie you up. Oh, Lord. I know a handcuff might sound rough Once she gets starter. Baby, you can't get enough. I'm going tie you up. I want to tie you up. Tie you up. Tell your sister I want tie you up.

[C]

Some.

[E]

Nice to see you. So glad you came cu. I still love you but I can't recall your name. I want to tie you up. I want to tie you up. I want to tie you up. I'm going tie you up. You up babies. I'm not looking for a girl who likes to shop. I want a woman knows how to use a crop. I want to tie you up. You up. I want to tie you up. Whoa, sweet Tina. I could never resist. If it don't hurt, she gets pissed. I'm going to tie you up. Moment tire up. You up, woman tie you up. Want to tie you up. Can you hear me?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yes, sir.

[E]

Look here, Mark like a dog. Much, much more with you. Things you never done before. I won't tie you you up.

[A]

All right.

[E]

I like.

[A]

I think I might have one for you, Duke.

[E]

Okay, go ahead.

[A]

I can't hear you, honey. You said what? I don't know what that thing is, but don't get that near my butt.

[D]

All right.

[E]

I'm gonna tie you up. He's singing about butt things now. I wanna tie you up.

[A]

Hold it.

[E]

Back fell. 1, 2, 3. Sam, I can't hear you.

[A]

Oh, we're right here.

[E]

I want to tie you up? Your turn. I want to tie you up? And do things that you never done before? I want to tie you up? I wanna tie you up? Show you my mullet? I wanna tie you up. I got you, didn't it?

[A]

It was a quick one.

[E]

I'm on one.

[D]

Tie you up.

[C]

One time.

[E]

Loud as you can. Just one time, that's all. I wanna tie you up.

[A]

I lied.

[E]

One more time. Loud as you can.

[A]

One more time.

[E]

I wanna tie you up?

[A]

I want to tie you up? We're tying you up.

[C]

This is the police.

[A]

What is that near your butt?

[D]

You're excellent, dude.

[A]

Maybe Duke Tomato. The Duke Tomato Trio with the beautiful horn section, the brass to mouth horns. Always a great pleasure to hear the horns. Jay Young on the sax. Neil Broeker on the sax. And Kent Hickey on the trumpet.

[D]

Everybody sounded great today.

[A]

Yeah, boil those trumpet lips. Could you imagine getting a hickey from Kent, Christy? I mean, it's gonna be serious. No offense, Kent, because his ambusher is so serious.

[C]

Were you kidnapped by a horn player when you were a kid? You really seem to be preoccupied with.

[A]

I just love that sound.

[C]

I love that song.

[A]

Well, thank you very much. Coming up, we've got Christy Lee. We got a little bit of history for you. We got some new words that we have to learn, all right? Most of which I think are bogus. And some more stuff with Duke and the boys. Thank you so much for joining us here in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[D]

Hey, thanks for listening this morning.

[A]

Got something to say? Send us an email. Bob and tomobandtom.com.

[C]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. There's Christy Lee.

[B]

Hi.

[C]

There is Pat Godwin.

[E]

Hello.

[C]

There is Jeff Hosking.

[D]

Yes, sir.

[C]

Josh Arnold.

[D]

Hey, Chick.

[C]

Hey, indeed. There's Ace Cosby. Hey, I'm Chick McGee. Hello, Tom.

[A]

Hello, Chick McGee. Got some nice sounds there. It's the Duke Tomato Trio featuring the Brasta Mouth Horns. They're going to be on the road. Coming up Thursday evening, the Wilde Theater in Edwardsville, Illinois. Saturday, January 24th, it'll be a couple shows at the famous Jazz Kitchen. They've got the Temple Theater in Des Moines on the 30th of January. That's a Friday night. And then February 6th and February 7th, a Friday Saturday at the beautiful Kingston Mines in Chicago. While I'm at it, we got Willie G. And Greg Hahn at the Caravan beginning Thursday evening in Louisville. Castockia Konamopoulos is going to be doing his thing in Stockton, California, at Valley brew on the 17th. He'll be in Cozad, Nebraska. He's got Janesville, Wisconsin, coming up on the 29th at the Comedy Cabin. And more. Thanks very much, Duke. We'll get another song out of Duke and the boys in just a few minutes. Right now, we're going to go back over to the lady in the faux fur.

[B]

You know where I got this shirt?

[A]

I know I don't.

[B]

Cracker Barrel.

[D]

Very nice. Yep, the country store does hella business.

[C]

Is that a. Is that a quarter zip? Yeah. Oh, there you go. Oh, look at that. Hello.

[D]

Cleavage.

[C]

What?

[D]

Oh.

[C]

Oh, it has a muffler.

[A]

Country muffin.

[D]

Oh.

[A]

So that thing you put your hands in, that's known as a muff?

[B]

Yeah, it's a muff.

[D]

It is. Yeah.

[A]

I didn't know that.

[B]

Yes.

[D]

You ever had both your hands in a month?

[A]

That's a. That is. That is a big gal.

[C]

You ever.

[D]

The old joke. You got both of you ever. Now clap. I can't. Tight, huh?

[C]

I've always heard. Well, I could flip a coin in that thing. Okay.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

I'm so sorry, Christy, do we have some language lesson here?

[B]

We do. The Cambridge Dictionary has welcomed a few new words into their database. They include frost jacking. Anybody want to take a guess as to what that means?

[C]

Just in time for Halloween?

[A]

I think it's. This actually happened to a friend of mine, but I. He has never used the word frost jacking.

[D]

Can we take a second and kind of think about this?

[B]

Yeah, absolutely.

[C]

I.

[D]

Honestly, I. Nothing is coming to mind.

[A]

I'll give you. I'll give you a hint.

[C]

Is it something to do with a pumpkin?

[B]

Nope.

[A]

No.

[D]

Does it have anything to do with a snow cone that you masturbate with?

[B]

No.

[D]

Man, answer the question, because you know how often that comes up.

[B]

No, but it should be frost, Jackie.

[C]

Well, there's a.

[A]

What is that?

[C]

What's the snow? No, the snowball's not anything.

[D]

And you said this happened to a friend?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

It involves an automobile.

[D]

Frost jacking.

[B]

Give up.

[C]

Somebody's playing with you. Out in the cold.

[B]

It's the act of stealing a car that has been left unattended with the engine running to defrost in cold weather.

[D]

Okay.

[B]

Start your car.

[D]

So it's carjacking, but you're not in there yet.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Yeah. I think most of us I'm familiar.

[A]

With, but really, I do.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

The friend of mine that had happened to. This is actually kind of funny. He. The car was stolen from his driveway.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And then he. They didn't find it. And then a week later, on a whim, he decided just to drive around and he drove. He lives at a very nice place, but there was an apartment complex kind of, you know, a couple hundred yards away that of course was full of losers. And.

[D]

As apartment complexes will be.

[A]

No, is this the one I live in? I give you. This is your section 8, I believe is the term. Anyway, so he drives through the thing and there's his car.

[B]

Well, the guy didn't need to go far.

[A]

Yeah, that's the funny thing. It was. I mean, it wasn't more than a thousand yards from his house. So he calls the cops and he goes, hey, you gonna go get this car? No, no. Do you have an extra set of keys? He goes, yeah, go get it. So he mutt. Got the car.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

But now the thief has the key to his car.

[A]

Well, then you go to and get a new key thing.

[C]

Isn't it incredibly difficult to steal cars anymore? I mean, you know where your car is all the time, like.

[E]

Yeah, pretty much.

[C]

I know. Because of the app and stuff. Yeah, right.

[A]

In some ways it's easier.

[C]

Oh, really?

[A]

Remember I was telling you.

[C]

What are those ways?

[A]

Well, there are certain cars that can be started with an iPad.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

I start my car, my car with the phone.

[C]

With the phone.

[A]

Yours isn't one of them, but there's another. I won't say which one it is that it's.

[D]

You got the Kia boys. They're still in Kias with. All you need is a phone charger. Yeah, yeah. There are these weird little tricks.

[A]

So it's bringing back.

[D]

To unlock and start.

[A]

It's bringing back the bar thing. What's that called?

[D]

Club.

[A]

The club. The club is having kind of a renaissance because that. The club is a. Is a. Like a bar that you. That goes on the steering wheel. So that. Yeah, you know what I'm talking. You're looking at me like I'm shooting snow cones up.

[C]

No, no, I'm looking at you like that because everyone knows what a club is.

[A]

I don't think they do. That was really popular in the 80s.

[B]

Keeps your steering wheel from turning.

[A]

Yeah, so.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

I remember when I was over in London this summer, I saw several Range Rovers that had the club. Well, that seems.

[D]

Of course over there they call them Philly Woggies. Yeah, they have a different name. Yeah.

[C]

And of course, the steering wheel is the bastard hole.

[D]

Right, right, right.

[C]

Different names for different things.

[A]

It's the anus wiggle, and you know it now. So the word frostjacking. Not really valid. Yeah, it's underscoring something that can happen. Be careful if you start your car and walk away.

[D]

But not enough to go into a dictionary.

[A]

Yeah, no one's right. I can't see my cop friend going, hey, did you hear about Gary's car got frost jacked.

[C]

You ever on really cold mornings, you start your car in the garage and then go out and jump in and.

[E]

No.

[A]

Drive away?

[B]

No.

[A]

Why would you do that?

[C]

Why wouldn't you do that? How long you think it's. How long do you think it takes for you to be overcome by exhaust in the garage?

[B]

I don't know, but I don't want to find out. Are you trying to find out?

[C]

Well, it's not three minutes, I can tell you that.

[A]

I don't want my house filling up with carbon monoxide.

[C]

Yeah, that's true. You might want to watch that.

[A]

Okay, what's the next.

[D]

I had a reliable mechanic tell me. You do not warming up your car like to get the engine and stuff? Isn't a thing.

[C]

It's not a thing.

[D]

Right.

[C]

You shouldn't have to do it.

[D]

You don't have to. You can. In the dead of winter, you can start your car and immediately drive it off.

[C]

But how. But.

[B]

But your car's gonna be cold on the inside.

[D]

Right? It's just. It's just a comfort.

[E]

Yes.

[D]

In my head, I thought you. It was good to warm up the parts. You know what I mean?

[A]

I think this is. As Christy pointed out, this is about defrosting the windshield.

[B]

Right?

[D]

Right. I had a mechanic say the exact opposite. That he lets his car run for 10 minutes before driving it. Even in the summer to let the parts. To let the oil get through all the gears before he drives.

[C]

That sounds like something Tom would do.

[D]

So obviously differing opinions. Apparently. Yeah.

[A]

I don't do.

[C]

We're all different.

[A]

I don't have that kind of time.

[B]

Okay.

[D]

I'm.

[A]

I'm. I'm in gear when the starter engine's still turning.

[C]

But you turn your TV on and let it warm up. Right?

[A]

Don't get me started on my tv. If I have to have that password one more time, I'm. I can't stand it.

[D]

What other words. I'm trying to help Tommy.

[B]

Ghost charging.

[A]

This I like.

[C]

Now I know what ghost poop is.

[A]

Ghost charging. This is a good one. This did not exist a few years ago.

[B]

No, it did not.

[D]

I don't know what this is either. I don't.

[A]

Your hint is. Your hint is target parking lot.

[C]

Huh?

[B]

Or airport.

[D]

Or Is this for EVs?

[B]

Yes. The act of using a charging bay for an EV and electric vehicle, but using it as a parking space and not actually charging your car.

[C]

Oh, boy.

[D]

That seems like a dirt bag move.

[A]

Yeah, it's great, isn't it?

[D]

You do it.

[A]

No, I don't. No.

[C]

You always told me you park as far away.

[A]

I do.

[C]

No, no.

[A]

There's. At our. The target I go to all the time. They've got a big charging station. Sure.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

But. Yeah. No, I don't. It's a dirt bag move, but it's a great word. Ghost charging.

[B]

This is something you may like. A read away.

[D]

Read away is when you actually take you. You sort of go somewhere to enable to read, to be able to read in peace. Or is there any other aspect to it?

[B]

It says a short holiday where the main activity is reading and talking about books.

[C]

Okay, that's the weird part. I can't think of anything worse in my life. Okay, I'm gonna read a book and then we're going to.

[D]

Oh, man.

[B]

I. I'm not a book club goer, but.

[D]

Yeah, same. I guess it might be enjoyable.

[A]

But didn't you go on a vacation a few years ago where you were in a cabin by yourself?

[C]

Here's what we're gonna do.

[A]

And you enjoyed yourself just reading, no phones?

[D]

Yeah, and I really nerded out. I read Cold Mountain. I was on the mountain. That cold mountain was cool.

[C]

Here's what we'll do. We'll get the. We'll get the sweatshirts. We'll. We'll start the reading club. The book club. And we'll never have a meeting, but we'll have everything. And we have. We have to act like we go to the book club. But there's no book club. You're either with me or I want.

[A]

To get back to Josh.

[C]

You're.

[A]

You're reading on the mountain?

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

That part of the book takes place in like the actual location. So I could. It was kind of cool.

[A]

And when it got really cold, you could do some frost Jack.

[D]

And then I read to the point. This is so nerdy. I deserve to be punched if you don't. You guys get a free punch if you.

[C]

Okay.

[D]

I read the first chapter of the House of the Seven Gables sitting next to the House of the Seven Gables.

[A]

Where was that?

[D]

So you got Salem messages.

[A]

Just the first. You got. You Got six more gables.

[D]

I got cold.

[A]

Boy, that is nerdy. Yeah.

[C]

Was that the specific reason you went there to Salem?

[D]

No, no, I just.

[A]

Did you have a Clark bar at.

[E]

The Gables, did you?

[A]

Well, the jokes that keep it coming. Well, I'm just adding to the. On that note, I say we move on. Coming up, we've got the Duke Tomato Trio and more.

[C]

But first, Chick McGee prize picks. That's right. High pressure football playoff matches every weekend and basketball almost every night. The action never stops, of course. On Prize Picks. Download the Prize Picks app. It's so simple to use on Prize Picks. Pick two to six players, pick more or less on their stat projections and submit your lineup. It's that easy. Prizepix also has early payouts. If your lineup gets off to a hot start, you have the option to cash out those winnings before the game finishes. Find Community on Prize Picks two copy lineups you like or use them as inspiration for your own picks with the new Social Feed feature. Don't miss any of the action this season with Prize Picks. Where it's good to be right. Download the prizepix app today and use the Code Tom. Show us some love and get $50 bonus credit instantly in lineups when you play $5. That's code Tom on prize picks. $50 bonus credit instantly in lineUps when you play $5 prize picks. It's good to be right. Must be present in certain states. Visit prizepix.com for restrictions and details.

[A]

Coming up, Duke and more of those crazy words from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[C]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. There's Christy Lee.

[B]

Hi.

[C]

At the Silac Insurance news desk, there's Pat Godwin.

[A]

Hello, Chick.

[C]

There is Jeff Oscar.

[D]

Yes.

[C]

There's Josh Arnold. Hi. He's at the IH Steven Singer, sidekick chair. There is Ace Cosby. I am Jake McGee at the prize Pick Sports desk. On Prize Picks, you simply pick two to six players, choose more or less and watch your lineups light up for the playoffs. Download Prize Picks, use Code tom and get $50 bonus credit instantly when you play. $5 must be present in certain states. That's prizepix.com for restrictions and details. Hello, Tom.

[A]

Hello, Chick Magee. Those are the sounds of the Duke Tomato Trio with the brass to mouth horns. They are good. We got your Duke Tomato and the guitar and the vocals. Bill Ritter, he's a bad man. He's on the bass. Dawson. He's on the drums, the Saxes, Jay Young and Neil Broker. And Kent Hickey, the man with the embouchure. He gives a hickey like no other. He's on the trumpet for us this morning. Thank you very much, gents.

[B]

Boy, can you imagine that when you're in middle school? Poor Kent. You probably got made fun of.

[D]

Oh, that's a tough one.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah.

[C]

Hickey.

[B]

Here comes Hickey.

[A]

Here comes Hickey.

[B]

You got a hickey.

[D]

Kent, why are you wearing that turtleneck? That was the old hickey.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

Have a hickey on your dicky.

[A]

Did you ever own a dickey?

[D]

Not the. No, not. Not that.

[A]

The. The fake turtleneck.

[D]

Right.

[A]

Well, we're going to hear a song from Duke in just a couple of weeks. Duke. Thank you very much. Thank you, boys. Yeah, there was a thing called. Do you know what, Mr. Oski? Do you know what a dickie is?

[D]

My grandfather wore them all the time and he wouldn't button his overshirt up high enough so you could see the line.

[A]

Yeah. The most famous treatment of that, I believe, is in one of the vacation movies, Christmas Vacation. Yeah. With Randy Quaid and, like, the Jet Black Dickie and the one. Those were very popular for a while. What a horrible.

[D]

I remember his mustard yellow dicky that he would wear this even louder shirt over with his little metal.

[E]

Good luck.

[A]

We've been learning new words. Christy, what have you got? You got a couple more new ones?

[B]

Yeah. Thrift tripping. This is one of Tom's favorites, thrift tripping.

[D]

Okay. Is this traveling to go to thrift stores?

[B]

Yep. Planning a holiday around visiting vintage shops?

[A]

No. Tall enough buildings that jump off to.

[B]

Buy secondhand clothes and other items.

[D]

I know a handful of. Full of people.

[C]

I do, too.

[D]

They love it.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Secondhand clothes.

[B]

Thing right now. Especially my kids saving money.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, Good boy. Those stores always smell weird.

[B]

They do smell funny. I agree. I will agree with that.

[D]

Yeah, yeah, sure. There's a.

[C]

Do you ever go to a thrift store and notice some of your clothes hanging there?

[B]

I have.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

Real. Not your.

[C]

But, yeah.

[B]

Have you ever bought something you gave?

[C]

Probably. Probably. I have.

[A]

This is like firing the coach and then he applies for the job.

[B]

Yeah. You're like, oh, wow, that's a great looking shirt. And then you go, oh, my God.

[C]

I gave this and it smells like.

[D]

So this isn't taking mushrooms and going to Goodwill? No, no, not that kind of tripping.

[B]

You could add that to this, I guess.

[C]

Yeah, we'll get you. Hi, Jeff. It'll be all right.

[D]

Thanks, buddy.

[B]

What about bio baiting?

[D]

Bio baiting? Lying in your bio to get people to message you?

[B]

Exactly. Writing an online dating profile that makes you seem much more interesting, attractive, etc. Than you really are.

[A]

Again, it's more of a thing than a word.

[B]

All of these are sort of that way. How about.

[C]

How about any bio I put up would have to be real more interesting than I really am. I thing. Go ahead.

[B]

Oh, you wouldn't even need a bio. All you gotta do is put Chick McGee, Bob and Top show, you'd be flooded.

[A]

Boom.

[C]

Yeah, boom, baby, boom.

[B]

How about chat phishing?

[D]

Chat phishing?

[C]

Don't know.

[B]

Using AI tools to write messages to other people on dating sites.

[A]

Oh, okay, well, that's just dumb.

[B]

So now you're not even using your own words.

[D]

Oh, I bet that's.

[C]

Hey, babe.

[A]

Again. Probably very common, but again, chat fishing.

[D]

Right, right.

[B]

And then grim keeping.

[C]

Okay, well, keeping track of people who die.

[B]

That's what I thought, Chick. Exactly. I really did when I first saw it. I believe that it is forming a relationship with someone based on disliking the same thing.

[A]

Perfect. I love that.

[D]

Yeah, I like that too.

[A]

I mean, I hate it.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. We got together because we both hate that. The same things. I believe that it makes sense.

[D]

That makes sense. I am not a fan of that.

[B]

Me either. Do you and your gal hate the same things?

[A]

No, not enough.

[C]

Unfortunately not enough.

[A]

She doesn't hate a lot of the stuff that I do. Oh, biobaiting. Sounds like Josh in seventh grade biology class.

[C]

Mr. Arnold, could you leave that thing alone for one period, please?

[D]

Sorry.

[A]

That petri dish does not need any new sample.

[D]

I can't help it. Gen Z. I masturbate in school during class with a pizza being ordered like Spagoli during class. Did anybody have a class masturbator?

[B]

What?

[C]

Oh, no. I had a class defecator.

[D]

Whoa. In their pants.

[C]

Something right there on the. Right there. In class?

[D]

Yeah. That's tough.

[C]

Flies gathered.

[B]

No.

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[D]

Flies. Wait, why did you. Yeah, man, we looked over one day and this guy just had it out. Now, he wasn't like. And he was going at it, he was waving it.

[A]

But. Okay.

[D]

But not to anybody in particular. My theory was, what class was he.

[B]

Just drying it out?

[D]

It was Earth science. Oh, yeah. It was a science class because we. We're sitting at these long tables with magnet or microscopes on high school. This was junior high.

[B]

Junior high.

[D]

And he. He had it out and he was kind of waving it under the desk and Then. And we were all like, what do we do? I remember this guy's name and everything. He was like. He was like a popular kid.

[C]

Oh, my.

[D]

And then he just put it away. And I went, man, maybe I should give this guy the benefit of the doubt that he was. He had a class, you know, one of the erections that happens in school and just had to relieve the pressure. It was. Yes, Just kind of release it for a second and then put it back away. But I remember also thinking, that is insane.

[A]

Whatever happened to this kid? Did you ever do a follow through?

[D]

I don't know what happened to him. He was like, really popular because he could dance. Like, he was a crazy dancer.

[A]

Well, I got a couple guesses.

[C]

Anybody?

[A]

Yeah, I'm with you.

[B]

Go there.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

A lot of guys.

[D]

Girls. It was. Yeah. He loved girls and they loved him.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Yeah. Boy.

[A]

Wow, what a memory. Okay, well, those are some new words.

[B]

Well, we have another one that's not in the dictionary, but this is the Gen Zers. They have concocted a new slang term. It's called chapel ganger.

[D]

Okay, so we know that a doppelganger is somebody who looks pretty much exactly like you.

[E]

Uh huh.

[C]

Chapel.

[D]

A. Chapel gang.

[A]

I don't buy this one.

[D]

Is it somebody that has the exact same haircut?

[B]

According to the New York Post, Josh, the term refers to a lookalike who is less attractive. It's a portmanteau of the words chopped, which is another slang word for ugly, and then doppelganger.

[D]

Dude, the word chopped for ugly is funny.

[B]

Yeah, I thought Al's had that with us before.

[A]

Okay, chopped.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

Chapel ganger. I just call him my little brother.

[A]

There's an El Chapo ganger if you look like the Mexican drug lord. Or a coppelganger if you look like Ted Koppel. Look like a newscaster that parts your hair too low.

[C]

He does part. Well, he still does. Yeah, way too long.

[A]

Even when he had a full head of hair, he parted it just above the ears.

[D]

Ed Copple is still with us.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's on Sunday morning every night.

[D]

Oh, he's not just mumbling in a room somewhere?

[C]

No, no, no, no. He's mumbling.

[B]

Indiana lawmakers are working to make the pork tenderloin the official state sandwich.

[C]

I. I thought it was.

[B]

I did too.

[C]

What happened?

[D]

Real popular there.

[B]

Indy Star reports that a bill naming pork tenderloin as a state sandwich has moved forward in the Indiana Senate.

[C]

What's the name of the paper there?

[B]

The Indie Star.

[A]

So we don't need. Don't worry about legal marijuana or any other issues. We got the pork.

[B]

The bill's sponsor, Senator Andy zay, said in 49 other states, it's just a sandwich. But here in Indiana, breaded pork tenderloin is revered.

[D]

For those who haven't seen it, they are about the size of a dinner plate or an elephant ear on a regular.

[C]

That's the way they make.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

So it's sticking out of the.

[C]

That's a tender one.

[A]

That one looks like it's the size of some kind of sea creature.

[B]

You're right. It's an elephant. Here, I'm in.

[D]

What do you mean?

[C]

You wouldn't. You wouldn't like that?

[A]

No, no, but I mean, that particular one, they're showing like a stingray. Yeah, that's the size of a stingray with a hamburger bun on it.

[D]

I don't want to eat it so bad.

[B]

So do I. I'm having one tonight.

[A]

I always get him. I always get them. And I hold it up to my face and go, I.

[D]

A human being.

[C]

I am not an elephant man.

[D]

I am not an elephant man.

[C]

He makes one home run with bouncing security at the trampoline, and now I am not the elephant man. He just cuts right to it.

[A]

So this is. This is in front of the state legislature in Indiana to make.

[B]

Yeah, it'll move forward to the full Senate. The bill did have one opponent, though.

[D]

I love that.

[C]

I wish I lived there so I could. Could get a tender win like that.

[B]

The opponent asked that it be amended to Shapiro's pastrami sandwich, which is very good.

[A]

Oh, I.

[D]

But is that an Indiana local?

[C]

Yeah, it's local statewide.

[B]

I know. The opposition was withdrawn. Yeah, it seemed to be a joke.

[A]

They did. They got the other thing through.

[B]

What?

[A]

The official beverage of Indiana ranch dressing.

[C]

Oh, yeah, that's.

[B]

Apparently the newspaper ran a tenderloin tournament last year. I didn't know about this. Jones's Junction, a small diner in Akan, Indiana, was the winner.

[C]

Akan, Indiana, you say? Wow. Never.

[D]

Jones's Junction.

[A]

Might be worth a road trip.

[B]

Yeah, it might be.

[C]

Can you think of something that you would not eat if it had ranch dressing on it? I think I would eat almost anything.

[D]

Chocolate ice cream.

[C]

I. I think I'd give that a try.

[A]

Oh, I have a good joke, but I can't say it out loud.

[C]

Is it like parsley or a bowling ball?

[A]

It has a person's name on it.

[C]

And you'd eat that if it ever. Interesting. No, I didn't think.

[A]

Oh, no, because as you said earlier, what was your. How was your phrase? Attracts flies.

[C]

Flies had gathered flies.

[A]

Much more poetic. Thank you. Let's check in with Duke. We've got the Duke tomato trio and the brass to mouth horns. They're all warmed up in the room. Duke, you got something for us? What are you thinking of playing in this song?

[E]

Good, you cleared it, so I want to play it.

[A]

All right, good.

[E]

This is a title song from the last album we released, the song that's entitled how much crazy can you take. And it seems to fit the conversation this morning perfectly. Guys, get it. Man love a woman ain't nothing he.

[C]

Won'T do.

[E]

Under that spell he act like a fool, bite his tongue, look the other way they'll come a time he's got to say it's not just about love Is how much crazy can you take? She'll take your heart Lord make it ain't fall down on your knees leaving for a break not just about love how much crazy can you tell? And I'm not saying it doesn't go both ways and men have crazy days Rain that night wondering where he's gone Try not to think it might be doing wrong it's not just about love how much crazy can you take? Should take your heart, Lord gonna make it hate Sometime love can feel like a big mistake not just about love Sometimes much crazy can take Lord made a song in a special way See it around you every day telling you baby, let me too Spite of all the crazy I'm still in love with you but it's not just about love it's how much crazy can take so still take your heart long gonna make an a Sometime love can feel like a big mistake it's not just about love it's how much crazy can build.

[A]

Bill Ritter plays a lot of bas.

[E]

Sam. Oh, yeah, baby it's not just about love how much crazy can you take? She'll take your heart love don't make it here Sometime love can feel like your biggest mistake it's not just about love much crazy can you take? You can try your best there's right and wrong come a time to say stay too long telling you baby, let me too in spite of all the crazy you still love me too but it's not just about sweet sweet lord sometime my darling how much can you tell? Day is not just about not just about sweet, sweet. How much can. You Is not just about sweet sweet love no sometime I f. How much can you take? It's not just about sweet, sweet love no Sometime I don't. How much can you take.

[B]

Duke?

[A]

The Duke Tomato Trio and the Brass to mouth horns. And coming up, we have a little bit of a history lesson for you.

[B]

All right?

[A]

And a couple of other interesting things. A little more music from Duke, I hope. And right now, I turn to to Chick McGee. Feel safe and comfortable in my home.

[C]

Home security at the compound. That's right. You want to feel like you picked a system that actually keeps trouble away, not one that just tells you something bad's already happened. That's why I love my Simplisafe home security system for the compound. It's not just another alarm. It's designed to help stop crime before it starts. We use it here at the Bob and Sound studios as well and is super easy to set up at home. Uses AI powered cameras outside your compound to spot real threats and instantly alert live agents. And this is what makes it different from the rest. Agents actually take action while the intruder is still outside. They can talk to them through the camera, let them know they're being watched and that police are on the way. And if needed, they can blast a siren and light them up with a spotlight. Other systems might give you a camera and a notification, but they need you to see the alert and handle it. Not simply safe, they're monitoring. Agents have your back even when you're busy, maybe asleep. And right now, get 50% off any new system this month. Only it's a great time to upgrade to security that actually helps stop crime before it starts. Go to simplisafetom.com that is simply safe. Tom.com and lock in that discount. Remember, there's no safe like simply say.

[A]

Obscure trivia and history will be on the way. From the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios, this is the Bob and Tom Show. Hey, thanks for listening to the Bob.

[D]

And Tom show this morning.

[A]

Get a look at today's show on our YouTube channel.

[D]

Channel.

[C]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. At the Silac Insurance news desk, it's Christy Lee. There's Pat Godwin.

[B]

Hello.

[C]

There's Jeff Osk.

[D]

Yep.

[C]

Josh Arnold at the I Hate Steven Singer Sidekick chair. Hi, there's Ace Cosby. I'm Chick mcgee at the Prize Pick sports desk. Hello, Tom.

[A]

Hello, Chick McGee. Just getting in the groove with Duke here. Yes, the Duke Tomato Trio featuring the Brastamouth Horns. They have been the house band today.

[C]

We are enjoying it.

[A]

Thank you very much. Now we're gonna get back to the action here. Thank you very much for Duke and the boys. And they got Some stuff coming up including Thursday at the Wildy Theater, Edwardsville, illinois. Saturday the 24th, two shows at the famed Jazz Kitchen. Also on the way, Des Moines. And on the 30th. That's a Friday, 30th of January. And then February 6 and 7, the legendary Kingston minds in Chicago. Right now we turn back to Christy Lee at the news desk. What you got over there?

[B]

No history today, huh?

[A]

Well, I can do it for you.

[B]

Well, I have a story. Quick. Oh, you have history ready?

[A]

I can.

[B]

I'll do the story. Bison have returned to Illinois prairies. Well, when he's ready, then we'll go. We'll let him go.

[A]

She just got here.

[B]

Bison have returned to Illinois prairies after nearly 200 years. According to CBS News, a herd was recently reintroduced to Burlington Prairie as part of a long awaited return led by the American Indian center following decades of careful land management.

[C]

Of course, I heard of them.

[B]

The American Indian center will steward the herd in partnership with King County Forest Preserves and an experienced herd manager. The plan is for the bison to be released into a larger fenced in prairie in the spring where they will help restore native grasslands and be part of educational programs. This is great.

[C]

Don't fence me. Oh, we're already fenced in. Never mind.

[D]

Keep me fenced.

[A]

And. And what we. A bison is what we call a buffalo. Incorrectly, Right, Right.

[B]

Correct.

[A]

So if the Bills take on the Bears down the road here.

[C]

In the.

[A]

Super bowl, those bison don't have a chance.

[C]

Ah, boy, that's a wacky super bowl, huh? The Bills and the Bears. How about that?

[B]

That'd be fun.

[C]

Actually, that'd be one of the most viewed Super Bowls ever.

[A]

I think so. Well, it is time to review a little bit of history.

[C]

If you don't know.

[A]

Oh, I love this guy. Happy birthday, the late Rip Taylor.

[D]

Yes, I do too, Chick.

[B]

You like him, Fatty guy.

[C]

Yes, he'll.

[A]

And the wig joke craftsman.

[D]

That's him. Did anybody get to see him live? Yeah, you did our TV show. Yeah, he was.

[E]

He was crazy.

[D]

Yeah, he was fun.

[A]

Do you suppose he.

[D]

Big red mustache.

[A]

Was he buried with a. I'll tell you this, I didn't like Fetty or.

[C]

I didn't like him and I didn't laugh at him until he started taking off the wig in a. Like almost every show.

[D]

Yes.

[C]

Every time I saw him, he'd take off the wig.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

You think this is easy? And they pull the record. Hilarious. Hilarious.

[A]

Yeah. If you're not familiar with Rip Taylor, you'll have to kind of do A Google thing. Happy birthday. 1961. Julia Louis Dreyfus.

[D]

Wonderful. Yeah.

[C]

Great.

[A]

Jaws. Great. And Close Encounters. Oh, we know. That's Richard Dreyfus.

[C]

JLD Veep.

[A]

Very good show.

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

Happy birthday. Trace Adkins, of course, famous for his diet.

[C]

And there's very little. Very little of a meal left. Never mind.

[A]

And then. Oh, McDreamy. Patrick Dempsey, 1966. And he's got a new TV series.

[C]

Out there right now, evidently. It's troubling. It's. Yeah.

[B]

I didn't know that from the previous.

[C]

Looks like he's. He's a killer.

[B]

Oh, no.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Doesn't McDreamy sound like an ice cream thing? McDonald's is going to come out with kind of a. Yeah. Sunday. Oh, it's.

[C]

The ice cream machine broke.

[B]

Oh, that happened to me the other day. Ice machine will be coming back soon.

[A]

Oh, the super hot Ruth Wilson.

[C]

It's broke. Who?

[D]

Super hot.

[C]

Dude, you're wrong on that.

[A]

Isn't she the one from.

[C]

Yeah, from Luther and she's on down Cemetery Road from the Affair. She's an adorable lady, but super hot. Is.

[A]

Did you see the Affair?

[C]

I have not seen the Affair.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

Naked.

[A]

Oh, there's.

[D]

Yes.

[A]

A lot of. A lot of probing in that first.

[C]

Probing.

[A]

Okay. Now this is. This guy.

[C]

Here's a guy.

[A]

He's famous, kind of for the wrong reason. William Hung.

[D]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

[A]

Early on American Idol he did the she Bang. Sure.

[D]

Shame on that show.

[A]

And then they. They brought him back two more times in the last few years, hopefully to apologize for anniversary. Yeah, he had a. And then he had a pretty rough go. I guess he was addicted to gambling and had some other problems.

[B]

Oh, my.

[A]

But yeah.

[C]

Well, if you can't handle stardom.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah, they were. It was kind of mocking him. And there's a kind. Yeah, yeah. He was a terrible singer. And yeah. Who knows? But yeah, it did not end well. He's. I guess he's. Believe it or not, I want to say I think he's a motivational speaker now.

[B]

Really?

[A]

Yeah. I'm not kidding. Because he. He went through a pretty rough. Can you.

[C]

Have you read his book Hung out to Dry? It's incredible.

[D]

It was hard to read, but. Yeah. Yeah. Really? Boy.

[C]

Yes. They've got some explaining to do. Let me tell you.

[D]

They sure.

[A]

Just being named Hung is rough enough.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

I guess it could have been worse. Could have been Dick Hung.

[D]

Yeah. William's better.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. Although Willie Hung would be okay.

[C]

Sorry.

[A]

Elton John releases. Don't shoot me. I'm the piano player chick. Your thoughts?

[C]

It's an okay album. Not one of my favorite Crocodile Rock, but I still listen to it every now and then, unlike, oh, I don't know, the one or Birds.

[D]

The opening organ of Crocodile Rock dares you to like it. You know, it's like, yeah, that's, it's, this is going to be garbage and then it turns into something. Okay. Actually, it's a fun song.

[C]

Right?

[D]

Exactly. But that.

[A]

I'm out. Very quickly. I'm out. Also, Rod Stewart, do you think I'm sexy?

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

And now here's an update. Josh Arnold on Rodster.

[D]

Josh, how's the stomach today? Still filled with semen?

[C]

Absolutely.

[A]

All right.

[D]

Yeah, there's no doubt that that happened.

[A]

And the Beastie Boys released Licensed to.

[D]

Ill, one of the greatest of all time in 1987. On this day, man, we loved that album.

[A]

Okay, now, thanks again to the Duke Tomato and the Duke Tomato Trio with the addition of the brass to mouth horns. And also thanks to Kostaki, et cetera, et cetera. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show. Thanks for listening to the Bob and.

[D]

Tom show, sponsored in part by Java House. The official coffee and refreshments of the Bob and Tom Show.

[A]

The United States Soccer Federation presents the U.S. soccer Podcast.

[D]

My name is David Goss and I'm joined by my co host Megan Kleinenberg.

[B]

Everything up until this point has been an outside look at the World cup and now we're giving people an inside look. It is just total pressure cooker.

[D]

Watching flags come out of little plastic balls is like the epitome of everything that I love. And the World cup is everything. It's why I became a soccer fan.

[A]

The U.S. soccer Podcast. Follow and listen on your favorite platform.