The BOB & TOM Show - January 2, 2025

Summary

The BOB & TOM Show - January 2, 2025 Released on January 2, 2025

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1. Opening Comedy Bit: "Shifting Gears" Promotion

[00:00 – 05:20]

Hosts Tom Griswold and Chick McGee kick off the show with a humorous take on the new ABC family comedy "Shifting Gears", starring Tim Allen and Kat Dennings. The sketch features playful banter about their daughter's financial troubles and moving back home.

Notable Quotes:

• Tom Griswold [00:00]: "Abc. Tim Allen and Kat Dennings star in the new family comedy Shifting Gears."
• Chick McGee [00:05]: "Dad, I'm broke and I need a place to stay until I figure out what the rest of my life looks like."
• Chick McGee [02:19]: "Shut up, shut up, shut up."

The segment satirizes typical sitcom family dynamics with exaggerated comedic elements, setting a lighthearted tone for the episode.

2. News Highlights: Unusual and Entertaining Stories

[05:20 – 12:04]

Christy Lee delivers a series of quirky news stories interspersed with the hosts' comedic reactions. Topics range from Olympic medals made with Eiffel Tower pieces to a man mistaking an old man for a dog in a parking lot.

Notable Stories:

• Olympic Medals [19:09 – 22:35]:

  • Christy Lee [19:14]: "The medals that will be awarded at the Paris Olympics will be made with pieces of the Eiffel Tower."
  • Tom Griswold [19:27]: "That is incredibly cool."

• Mysterious Parking Lot Encounter [09:11 – 12:04]:

  • Chick McGee [09:13]: "I was at the grocery store with my forklift... it wasn't a dog. It was an old man and a fuzzy hat."
  • Tom Griswold [12:03]: "Has your son ever slept on a dog bed?"

The hosts humorously explore the oddities of these stories, blending genuine interest with playful teasing.

3. Guest Comedian Segments: Insights and Laughter

[12:04 – 42:16]

The show features several guest comedians who share personal stories and engage in lighthearted conversations with the hosts.

a. Sam Miller: Overcoming Adversity

[12:04 – 31:20]

Comedian Sam Miller discusses his journey to sobriety, his early struggles, and his life as a husband and father. He humorously recounts experiences like battling addiction and the challenges of reconnecting with his family.

Notable Quotes:

• Sam Miller [30:53]: "I owe my sobriety to a bad tumble out of a tree."
• Chick McGee [31:20]: "But you did get sober before you went to jail?"

Sam’s candid storytelling, interwoven with comedic flair, provides both inspiration and entertainment.

b. Dan St. Paul: Baseball Announcers and Life on Tour

[04:35 – 37:58]

Dan St. Paul shares his love for baseball announcers and amusing anecdotes from his tours with Nate Bargatze. The conversation touches on the intricacies of sports commentary and the camaraderie among comedians.

Notable Quotes:

• Dan St. Paul [33:18]: "Baseball to me is soothing. It's like that calm app on your phone."
• Chick McGee [35:05]: "Oracle Park is probably one of the most beautiful parks."

Dan’s insights into the world of sports and comedy create engaging and relatable content for listeners.

c. Nick Novicki: Navigating Comedy with Little Stature

[37:58 – 84:14]

Nick Novicki discusses his experiences as a comedian with dwarfism, touching on topics like societal perceptions, the importance of representation, and his role as a father. His interactions with the hosts are marked by humor and heartfelt moments.

Notable Quotes:

• Nick Novicki [42:12]: "I've been in 50 TV shows and movies. So when I started out, you were basically going to work in specific roles."
• Chick McGee [83:32]: "You look like a miniature John Lennon."

Nick’s stories about overcoming challenges and his commitment to comedy provide depth and laughter.

d. Dave Landau & Matt McClory: Exploring High Spirits and Humor

[93:03 – 84:14]

Dave Landau and Matt McClory join the show to share their comedic perspectives on everyday life. Their banter includes funny takes on sobriety, family dynamics, and the lighter side of personal growth.

Notable Quotes:

• Chick McGee [104:35]: "He dilly dallied with people he should, probably shouldn't have."
• Sam Miller [112:48]: "I stopped going to the Batman movies after Nicholson left."

The duo’s chemistry and comedic timing add a vibrant energy to the episode.

4. Olympic Medals Made from the Eiffel Tower

[19:09 – 22:35]

A standout discussion revolves around the innovative design of the Paris Olympic medals, which incorporate pieces of the iconic Eiffel Tower. Hosts and guests marvel at the artistic fusion of tradition and modernity.

Notable Points:

• Metal Integration: The medals feature hexagonal polished chunks of iron from the Eiffel Tower, stamped with "Paris 2024."
• Artistic Significance: The combination symbolizes the blending of history with contemporary athletic achievement.
• Cultural Impact: The segment highlights the global significance of the Olympics and its ability to incorporate iconic landmarks into its ceremonies.

5. Rejected License Plates: Creativity and Censorship

[161:40 – 172:26]

Pat Godwin presents a humorous segment on vanity license plates that were rejected by the Indiana Bureau of Motor Vehicles. The plates range from playful wordplays to outright cheeky messages.

Notable Rejected Plates:

• Geo Ta Space Poo: A creative yet scatological attempt to parody space themes.
• F U S T R: Interpreted humorously by the hosts as an expletive.
• BIG P: A playful nod to "big penis," showcasing the fine line between humor and appropriateness.

Notable Quotes:

• Tom Griswold [162:15]: "Ass man. Yeah, yeah."
• Chick McGee [165:23]: "Glasses... two more."

The hosts' reactions blend amusement with playful criticism, emphasizing the creativity and limits of personal expression in public spaces.

6. Close Encounters and Humorous Misunderstandings

[09:11 – 12:04]

Chick McGee recounts an encounter where he mistakes an old man for a dog in a parking lot, leading to an amusing interaction about miscommunication and assumptions.

Notable Quotes:

• Chick McGee [09:13]: "And it was an old man and a fuzzy hat."
• Tom Griswold [12:03]: "Who the hell do you think you are?"

This story highlights the hosts' ability to find humor in everyday misunderstandings, resonating with listeners who have experienced similar situations.

7. Tribute and Reflection: Remembering Paul Reubens

[71:33 – 84:14]

The hosts pay tribute to the late Paul Reubens, known for his character Pee Wee Herman, sharing fond memories and humorous reflections on his legacy.

Notable Quotes:

• Pat Godwin [62:25]: "Please accept my apology for not going public with what I've been facing the last six years."
• Tom Griswold [63:13]: "I hope he pops out of the casket and shouts."

The segment blends respect with the show's signature humor, celebrating Reubens' impact on comedy while maintaining a lighthearted tone.

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Conclusion

The January 2, 2025, episode of The BOB & TOM Show delivers a mix of comedy sketches, quirky news stories, and engaging conversations with guest comedians. Highlights include the creative discussion on Olympic medals featuring the Eiffel Tower, a humorous look at rejected license plates, and heartfelt tributes to comedic legends. Throughout the episode, the hosts maintain their trademark blend of wit, camaraderie, and insightful humor, ensuring an entertaining experience for both regular listeners and newcomers.

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Subscribe to listen to the entire show: BobAndTom.com/VIP
For the full episode without interruptions, consider accessing the VIP podcast.

Transcript

[Tom Griswold]

Abc. Tim Allen and Kat Dennings star in the new family comedy Shifting Gears.

[Chick McGee]

Dad, I'm broke and I need a place to stay until I figure out what the rest of my life looks like.

[Tom Griswold]

So a couple of days. I love it when his daughter moves back in.

[Chick McGee]

The last time you walked out that.

[Tom Griswold]

Door, you look back at me and gave me a double bird.

[Chick McGee]

I was 18. The double bird was how I ended all our conversations.

[Tom Griswold]

The wheels come off.

[Chick McGee]

Can we try to talk to each other like rational adults?

[Tom Griswold]

Have you watched the news lately?

[Chick McGee]

That's not a thing anymore.

[Tom Griswold]

Series premiere Wednesday, 8, 7 Central on ABC and stream on Hulu.

[Christy Lee]

It's the Bob and Tom Show.

[Tom Griswold]

Excuse me, darling. I hate to interrupt you, but there's.

[Chick McGee]

Something I must tell you.

[Tom Griswold]

I will sing for you now, my dear. If you find yourself in Holland, they'll say to you, how ya ma? In France, they'll say, ferme la col. In Athens, you'll hear skamos In Berlin, it's herten siede schnauzer. In Jakarta, it's simply buncombe. Let me translate for you, darling. Shut up, shut up, shut up. Has there ever been a topic on which you don't expound? Has there ever been any. A moment when your mouth wasn't making a sound? Have you ever had the feeling that you might have said, enough? I am begging you, my darling.

[Dave Landau]

Shut up, shut up, shut up.

[Tom Griswold]

Day or night, it does not matter. You still want to shoot the breeze? When I hear your constant chatter, I'm thinking, someone shoot me, please. Maestro, look, he changed. Now we are in the bedroom. Ah, so comfortably recline. Too bad the only intercourse we're having is the conversational kind. There's just one way to stop you from blabbering so much. Say hello to Mr. Johnson and shut up. Shut up. Shut up, shut up. Shut up.

[Christy Lee]

Good morning.

[Chick McGee]

Hello.

[Sam Miller]

From coast to coast, it's the Blab and Tom Show.

[Christy Lee]

Many portions of the upcoming program have.

[Chick McGee]

Been pre recorded, meaning they've already happened.

[Christy Lee]

And they're about to happen again.

[Sam Miller]

So where was I?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah. Ladies and gentlemen, we're glad to have you here. It's the Bob and Tom Show. Josh Arnold, the I hate Steven Singer sidekick chair.

[Chick McGee]

I have an embarrassing confession after this.

[Christy Lee]

All right, all right. There's Ace Cosby, I'm Chick McGee, and.

[Tom Griswold]

Here'S Tom Griswold on a serious note. And a not serious note. First off, Bob doing great.

[Chick McGee]

Good.

[Tom Griswold]

Bob is home and Becky is taking care of him. And he's doing real well. And we'll be good news. Be able to talk to him soon. So hang in there, Bob. He's doing great. So it's been a recovery. He had his operation about a month ago and the cancer is gone. So that's great news. Anyway, on a silly note, we were talking about these code phrases for having intimate encounters. Thank you for going right to the chase. There is a phrase.

[Christy Lee]

I didn't say anything.

[Pat Godwin]

I did.

[Christy Lee]

Oh.

[Tom Griswold]

I said Christine. I said Christy.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

What? What'd she say?

[Tom Griswold]

I missed sex. Sex, sex. It.

[Christy Lee]

Okay, right in the who.

[Tom Griswold]

I got a code delivering that.

[Chick McGee]

Who.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, dirty leg. Let me taste the salad.

[Christy Lee]

That's exactly. That's exactly how I picture you. Non sequiturs. Not connected. Absolutely nothing. What you're talking about.

[Chick McGee]

I don't know how you had kids.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, I don't either.

[Tom Griswold]

The phrase and time and trouble to remind me is celebrating Bob's birthday.

[Pat Godwin]

Sure.

[Tom Griswold]

So, Christy, you could be at an elegant dinner, which, I don't know. You like elegant dinners?

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

You're there with your man and there's maybe six other people at the table, and all of a sudden he goes, oh, I'm sorry, we have to go. We've got to go celebrate Bob's birthday. Then you can get up and leave and then knock on off in the car. There you go.

[Pat Godwin]

Perfect night.

[Tom Griswold]

But it's a. It's a nice neutral phrase. People don't know what you're doing, what you're talking about. As opposed to, you know, some of the phrases that have been suggested. I always say to my wife, let's go bump uglies. Really, it's gotta make her feel good.

[Christy Lee]

Well, have you really.

[Chick McGee]

They're not.

[Christy Lee]

You really seen those up close?

[Chick McGee]

All of our pudendums?

[Tom Griswold]

You think so?

[Chick McGee]

Unattractive.

[Christy Lee]

That's why you shut your eyes.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, mine's pretty. What? Well, it's because you bedazzle it. Light rouge.

[Tom Griswold]

As opposed to Josh, who has. Josh is famous for his grooming down there. The topiary like productions that you do. What is the current statuette in your pubes?

[Chick McGee]

The Ghostbusters logo. You stop doing all that, right? I still manscape. Yeah, regularly.

[Pat Godwin]

Our friend Zach.

[Tom Griswold]

Let me interrupt. Christy. I'm sorry.

[Pat Godwin]

Apology.

[Tom Griswold]

Have you ever encountered. Not to suggest that you've encountered a lot of them, but in the.

[Christy Lee]

Ask the room. How about that?

[Pat Godwin]

You can ask me. I'm upfront about all this.

[Tom Griswold]

Have you ever encountered one that was groomed in such a way that you were startled? Yes.

[Pat Godwin]

We talked about this off the air. Were you not in the room yesterday when we were talking about this?

[Tom Griswold]

No.

[Pat Godwin]

Yes, I did.

[Tom Griswold]

Can you describe it without it?

[Pat Godwin]

It was green. No, it was groomed. Almost like wearing long shorts.

[Chick McGee]

Huh.

[Pat Godwin]

You know what I mean? Like from the waist down to. Almost.

[Tom Griswold]

The knees had been straightened.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I see. Zero hair in that. It looked like he was wearing flesh boxers. Yes. Okay. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

I didn't take Andy for that kind of guy. Weird.

[Pat Godwin]

Not Andy. Oh, my God. I'm gonna hear about that. Thanks. This was a long, long time ago.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, it's three months. Wow. That is interesting.

[Pat Godwin]

Wasn't that interesting? I don't know. Maybe. I never asked. Maybe he was into biking or something, Wore bike shorts a lot. I don't know. But okay.

[Tom Griswold]

I like to do a com over.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, really?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, kind of. That's nice. Like Rudy Giuliani's head. You know, the kind of pathetic comb over that. No one's not fooling anybody. I'm sorry.

[Christy Lee]

We have.

[Pat Godwin]

Harry's gone. You need to get rid of all that.

[Tom Griswold]

No.

[Pat Godwin]

Being Harry is not good.

[Chick McGee]

It's very G, Tom.

[Pat Godwin]

It's very g. Well, you don't like your women that way. Why would you expect them to like you that way?

[Tom Griswold]

I have to tell women Mo Howard that it's time to go Curly. To put it into a three studio analogy, which we can all relate to.

[Christy Lee]

Would you care to see the numbers on how many people know? The percentage of people know who Mo Howard is.

[Tom Griswold]

Well. And those that don't, I feel sorry for.

[Chick McGee]

I do, too.

[Tom Griswold]

If you've never seen the episode of the Three Stooges where Curly is singing opera while they're putting the tone arm on. That is. That is so funny.

[Christy Lee]

Stupider.

[Tom Griswold]

I can even. I even know the melody.

[Chick McGee]

Right? Yes.

[Christy Lee]

Right.

[Nick Novicki]

Oh.

[Chick McGee]

May I tell you guys a story?

[Tom Griswold]

You may.

[Chick McGee]

I was at the grocery store with my forklift.

[Tom Griswold]

Were you buying potatoes?

[Pat Godwin]

Guys?

[Chick McGee]

Potatoes? Oh, no, it's not that story. I was heading out to my car with my shopping cart. Did you guys get a flat? And it was about.

[Christy Lee]

You mean shopping carts? Yes. Thank you.

[Pat Godwin]

Stop. You guys.

[Chick McGee]

It wasn't too hot. It was like maybe 78, something like that out. It was kind of nice out. And when was that? It was like, two or three days ago. It wasn't as bad as you might think.

[Christy Lee]

It's really hot now, though.

[Chick McGee]

I know the reason I'm bringing that up is because I looked over and the car that was parked there was. The window was down and there was a dog in the backseat. So what I'm Trying to say is it wasn't dangerously hot for the dog to be parked.

[Pat Godwin]

Gotcha.

[Chick McGee]

And I can only see the silhouette of the dog. And so I load my car up, and then I put the cart back in to the cart corral. Thank you. And I look over into the open window. I go, what are you doing in there? What are you doing in there? And I got a little closer, and it was not a dog. It was an old man and a fuzzy hat.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, did you regret having your pants half diamond?

[Christy Lee]

No. It's embarrassing enough. And then you say something like that and ruin the whole show.

[Chick McGee]

Sorry, I didn't see that coming.

[Tom Griswold]

That's just the kind of thing that I would have done.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

I did not see that.

[Chick McGee]

And the guy looked at me like I was an absolute maniac, as he should have. And he said, waiting for my son to come.

[Christy Lee]

An old man in a fuzzy hat.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

The only thing that would have made that better if he. I'm fine.

[Chick McGee]

He just goes, hello there, young man. And aren't you cute too, young man?

[Pat Godwin]

That would have been funnier if he went, boop, boop, boop.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

Did you scare him? He was somewhat alarmed, and I. I just kind of laughed.

[Tom Griswold]

Can you recreate the exact way you said it?

[Chick McGee]

Yes. I. As I was walking, too, because I wanted to get a look at the dog or whatever. You got to get a. What are you doing in there? What are you doing in there? Was there.

[Tom Griswold]

Could he.

[Chick McGee]

Was a window partially rolled down? Could he hear you at all? Yeah, it was all the way. It was all the way down.

[Tom Griswold]

Even better.

[Chick McGee]

And he was sitting in the center of the back seat.

[Tom Griswold]

That's weird.

[Chick McGee]

So I. And. But the silhouette with his hat, Bill. It looked like the nuz. The muzzle of a dog who's wearing a fuzzy hat in the summer. It was a. It was very fuzzy, and it was very long.

[Christy Lee]

I get cold.

[Chick McGee]

It was a silly hat.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Why do old people get so cold? I don't get it.

[Tom Griswold]

You know what.

[Chick McGee]

You know what's funny is that he's gonna go to his son or whoever's driving him. He's gonna. Yeah, this kind of. This guy just walked up and he used a dog voice.

[Tom Griswold]

It was so.

[Chick McGee]

And no one's gonna believe him, Right?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Grandpa's dimensions back. He thinks that he's seeing people talking to him in dog voices in the parking lot.

[Christy Lee]

It's really sad.

[Chick McGee]

Did you laugh all the way home? Yeah. They're like, ah, that guy must have. Who knows?

[Pat Godwin]

Weren't you embarrassed?

[Chick McGee]

Like, I Was embarrassed. What are you doing in there? Did you just look at me like, why are you talking to me like I'm a veteran of WA or 2? I'm more of a man than you'll ever be.

[Tom Griswold]

Who the hell do you.

[Pat Godwin]

Who the hell do you think you are?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, that's great.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, my God.

[Chick McGee]

But I kind of laughed and went and said sorry. Just got my car and left.

[Tom Griswold]

The only thing close to that recently, I was at a. I was at a place. It was a place where they make coffee. Kind of a mom and pop place.

[Christy Lee]

It was a place where they.

[Pat Godwin]

Coffee house, but it wasn't a Starbucks.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, it was a. And the lady in front of me started using a lot of Spanish words for the barista and got her coffee. I get up there and the guy looks at me and he goes, I don't know what the hell she's doing. I don't speak a word of Spanish. She was just assuming that this young man was of Mexican heritage. Wow. He took it well. Was like, what the hell just happened here?

[Chick McGee]

That story is unbelievable in the fact that I just can't believe that it was you who wasn't the person trying to speak Spanish to this person. Hola, el coffeeo Hot, por favor.

[Tom Griswold]

Dunkashane, senor. Hey, good morning and welcome to the Best of the Bob and Tom show here for a Thursday. This is Christopher in the Bob and Tom Studios. Coming up on the show today, rejected license plates plus stripper names. Nick Novicki, ian Bagg, Dan St. Paul, Sam Miller and lots more. But coming up next, Ed Septic checks in. We'll be right back. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Pat Godwin]

Bob and Tom.

[Christy Lee]

Bravo. TV star Lala Kent holds nothing back on the Give them Lala podcast. No, I have a very short few. Get to know the TV personality.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't need to watch the show.

[Chick McGee]

Because I get the real life version.

[Tom Griswold]

Relationships and motherhood.

[Pat Godwin]

Let me tell you something about breastfeeding.

[Christy Lee]

To business and beyond.

[Chick McGee]

You are scared of failure, so it.

[Tom Griswold]

Prevents you from trying.

[Pat Godwin]

This is where we implement a big set of ovaries and then we obsess.

[Chick McGee]

Follow and listen on your favorite platform.

[Tom Griswold]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show Here on a Thursday. This is Christopher in the Bob and Tom Studios. Ed Septic checks in during this segment of the Best of the Bob and Tom Show.

[Christy Lee]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show.

[Tom Griswold]

Next.

[Christy Lee]

We'Re getting ready for the Super Bowl. I'm thinking chili for me at the. At the compound.

[Chick McGee]

Excellent choice.

[Christy Lee]

I'm Going to get in that kitchen and make some chili. What do you think? I've got to open up the cabinet.

[Tom Griswold]

Slow cooker.

[Christy Lee]

Yes. Yes, I will slow cook.

[Chick McGee]

Will you serve it in a bowl of fritos?

[Tom Griswold]

Absolutely hot on top of spaghetti?

[Christy Lee]

No spaghetti.

[Chick McGee]

Cornbread.

[Christy Lee]

No cornbread.

[Tom Griswold]

I have both those ways.

[Christy Lee]

I have pretzel crackers. I, I. Oh, okay.

[Chick McGee]

Are they the flips where one side? It's like a.

[Christy Lee]

They are, absolutely.

[Chick McGee]

Those are awesome.

[Christy Lee]

So good.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

And now they have flavors like you take a trip in the Mediterranean or.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, really? You tell the dogs, hey, I'm off to the Mediterranean.

[Christy Lee]

That's right. And then I, I take them with me sometimes.

[Tom Griswold]

Right now it's time to shift gears a little bit. We'll go to the screen. And we have. Yep.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, it's Jeff Pro. Never talked about cousin.

[Chick McGee]

It's Ed Septic here. Septic sewage plumbing and supply.

[Tom Griswold]

And I like your. I like your outfit. That looks really familiar.

[Chick McGee]

Thank you. Zooming in here from my shop, having a cold one to start the day. Oh, it sure is.

[Christy Lee]

Look at that.

[Chick McGee]

You know what they say, it's 5:30 somewhere. Oh, yeah, it's real. You guys excited about the big game this weekend?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. You got a special.

[Chick McGee]

I don't even know who's in it. All I know is I'm rooting for the browns to go down. If you catch my dream.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, don't they? Can't they actually measure when the commercials play on the super bowl by toilet flushes in many cities?

[Chick McGee]

I don't know these facts and numbers that you're talking about, Tom, but I have to. Since it's you, I assume you're correct. That's correct. If you have a quick second, Tom, I wanted to introduce you to a good friend of mine.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, good.

[Chick McGee]

This is Turdy the turd wrench. Old Turdy here. That's right. Turdy is a 4th generation turd wrench ranch. It was passed down from my great grandfather Ned Septic to my grandfather Fred Septic to my dad Ted, then on to me, Ed. Hopefully one day I can pass it on to my son, Ed number two. Unfortunately, though, Ed number two is currently more interested in playing fortnite than learning the family business. But I guess I should cut him some slack. You're only six once, boy. If old Turdy here could talk the story, stories he would tell. My great grandfather Ned used old Turdy here during prohibition. Yeah, he'd use it to fix people's pipes and people got behind on their hooch payments to the Mob?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Then during the Depression, my grandfather Septic used Turdy to steal people's pipes so he could scrap them for cash to keep his family fed. All right, all the memories. My father once used Turdy here to fend off my mother when she caught him banging Ms. Jenkins from apartment 227. Because unlike myself, my father Ted would bang both your pipes and your wife all day, every day.

[Tom Griswold]

But not you, Ed.

[Chick McGee]

No, I remember on his deathbed, he handed old Turdy to me, hold me in close and said, I know your mother poisoned me, boy. I can't prove it, but the did it. Then he says to me, don't lose old Turdy here. It's the only thing that's ever mattered to me in my entire life. Oh, wow. Yeah. We had him cremated, then we flushed him down his favorite toilet at Tiger Stadium during the seventh inning stretch. Isn't that nice? Yeah. Now he's up in the clouds with his porcelain God and his angel soft toilet paper, looking down. I hope I'm making you proud, Papa. I'm sure you are, Edward. All right, I gotta run. I gotta. I got 9:30 at the Barnowskis. They got. They got a. They got a basement full of sewage up to their elbows. Oh, no. Anybody want to take the prop bet on the over under on the number of floaters? All right, go down brown.

[Tom Griswold]

That's Ed from Medseptic. Remember, bang your pipes, but he won't bang your wife.

[Christy Lee]

Always a true gentleman.

[Tom Griswold]

It's a family tradition. So nice. I'm sorry. Now we have some cool Olympic news. I think this is a great story. And you of course, don't.

[Christy Lee]

No, I. I think it's a wonderful story and I've been instructed to be enthusiastic about this story, so I will be. The medals that will be awarded at the Paris Olympics will be made with pieces of the Eiffel Tower.

[Tom Griswold]

Isn't that cool? I hope they didn't take the. I hope they didn't use the structural pieces at the bottom holding it up.

[Pat Godwin]

I don't think so.

[Christy Lee]

The hexagonal polished chunk of iron taken from the iconic landmark is being embedded in each gold, silver and bronze medal that will be hung around athletes neck.

[Tom Griswold]

That is incredibly cool.

[Christy Lee]

Games this summer, if I win a.

[Chick McGee]

Gold medal, I won it 100% gold.

[Christy Lee]

99.9% gold, baby. Gold.

[Tom Griswold]

It's a brilliant artistic.

[Chick McGee]

It's like when you get a brownie with nuts. Like. No, I just want the brownie.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

You know something?

[Chick McGee]

I gotta have nuts.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't agree with your analogy. But I do hate you wouldn't even.

[Chick McGee]

Let me just have that a little aside.

[Tom Griswold]

No, Josh is right. Nuts and brownies ruin them. I love nuts. I love brownies. No.

[Christy Lee]

Not even a pecan? No pecan. What about a pecan Sandy? Do you like those?

[Chick McGee]

Sure.

[Christy Lee]

And who was sandy, by the way?

[Tom Griswold]

And what is a sandy?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, it's a dusty cookie, but tasty.

[Christy Lee]

Joachim Ronson, head of design at the Paris Games Organizing committee. He's great, by the way. Peran. He thinks all Americans are filthy pigs. He said the iron. The iron chunks each weigh 18 grams. I'm not sure where we are in poundage or ounces.

[Chick McGee]

Iron Chunk was my nickname in elementary school.

[Christy Lee]

Is that right?

[Sam Miller]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Here comes iron.

[Chick McGee]

I always had a wrinkled shirt and I was fat, so they ironically called me Iron Chunk.

[Christy Lee]

Iron chunks in there. 18.

[Chick McGee]

I love nuts and brownies.

[Christy Lee]

They were taken from pieces that have been swapped out of the Eiffel Tower during renovations. You mean that's not the original Eiffel Tower that we see.

[Tom Griswold]

To maintain it, there are certain things they have to do. This is the coolest thing.

[Christy Lee]

Can you say it's a hundred percent the Eiffel Tower Tower as it stood in 1832 when it was constructed.

[Chick McGee]

I think it's 5% original material.

[Christy Lee]

That's exactly what I think.

[Tom Griswold]

It's almost exclusively original material.

[Chick McGee]

I don't want my silver medal with rusty bits in it.

[Christy Lee]

Games or game organizers added the metal used in the metals. Not to mention the Eiffel Tower bits. All recycled, not newly mined.

[Tom Griswold]

The picture on it?

[Christy Lee]

Nope. The chunks are stamped. I mean, no, not yet. But I will be looking forward to seeing them. Them. The chunks are stamped with Paris 2024.

[Chick McGee]

And that makes sense.

[Christy Lee]

The Games logo which looks like a flame or the face of a woman.

[Tom Griswold]

Lighting a cigarette with a bob hair one In France.

[Christy Lee]

What is the percentage of French people that smoke is like.

[Tom Griswold]

I think the per capita the most is. I want to say China. China.

[Christy Lee]

Is that right?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Somewhere in Asia. But I think France is still pretty high.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I think it's a great thing to put in the metal. That's. This is so cool. You don't. It's so artistic and fun.

[Christy Lee]

It sounds.

[Tom Griswold]

Paris Games are going to be great.

[Christy Lee]

It's interest. It's interesting. I, I. The jury's still out on how they're going to be able to do it.

[Tom Griswold]

What do you mean?

[Christy Lee]

They evolved logistically. It's causing nightmares.

[Tom Griswold]

Every. We hear this before every Olympics.

[Christy Lee]

No. Well, if you were like me and had several native Parisians calling you at midnight.

[Tom Griswold]

Only thing native Parisians call you, we can't say in the radio. Filthy flames with.

[Christy Lee]

I thought that was French. Are you kidding me?

[Chick McGee]

Well, pardon his French.

[Christy Lee]

Here's another story.

[Tom Griswold]

Do we know if they're going to be able to swim in the Seine yet?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, if they don't mind diarrhea for six weeks.

[Tom Griswold]

There was a. They had. There was a problem with E. Coli last summer. They were testing it. So it's going to be great. I'm very excited.

[Christy Lee]

So if you were an athlete and they said, okay, it's safe to swim in there now, would you swim in there now?

[Tom Griswold]

Sure. These. These athletes have spent the better part of their lives preparing for this. It's a great. It's going to be great.

[Christy Lee]

I'll ask someone reasonable. Yes, Jessica, would you swim? You're an athlete going to the Olympics. And they said, well, last year at this time it was full of E. Coli, that now it's fine, go ahead and swim. Would you swim?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

I mean, if they treated it.

[Sam Miller]

Yeah, right.

[Chick McGee]

I may. I'd go drink a glass right now. In front of me.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, that's right.

[Chick McGee]

Because the average Olympic swimmer ingests seven glasses of water. Did you know that? When they swim.

[Christy Lee]

Absolutely.

[Tom Griswold]

And that's just in the 50 meter. Those marathon guys.

[Christy Lee]

My God, I don't even want to talk about.

[Chick McGee]

Kids, do not tell that to your teacher.

[Christy Lee]

Today, the breaststroke. What if they have someone broadcasting the swimming competition in the Olympics and every time he says breaststroke, he. Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, my gosh.

[Chick McGee]

I stroke.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, man. Look at that.

[Tom Griswold]

All right.

[Chick McGee]

I'd watch those Olympics. The Olympics. They're essentially obsolete, aren't they? What do you mean? Nobody cares. Nobody watches.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, they do.

[Christy Lee]

They watch Snoop Dogg. Gary Hart. No, what's his name?

[Chick McGee]

Kevin.

[Christy Lee]

Kevin.

[Chick McGee]

I watch Gary Hart. Look at her.

[Tom Griswold]

Is he still alive?

[Chick McGee]

I don't. I don't know. But if you were announcing women's volleyball. I like it.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, Paris is famous for its open urinals.

[Chick McGee]

What do you mean open urinals?

[Christy Lee]

You mean like out on the sidewalk?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, eco friendly open urinals in the several parts of Paris.

[Chick McGee]

Lovely place.

[Tom Griswold]

I remember that. They drain right into the San.

[Christy Lee]

I don't think that's true.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, they have sidewalk commodes that are just glass. Great Poupon jars.

[Christy Lee]

Now that I believe.

[Tom Griswold]

Pardon me, I need a grape on John.

[Christy Lee]

Man, that commercial was everywhere. Remember that?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yes.

[Christy Lee]

Pardon me, do you have any gray Poupon?

[Chick McGee]

I'm a fan of Gray Poupon. I think it's a tasty mustard.

[Christy Lee]

I like it in certain. Certain hot dogs. I. I love it, but other than.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, that's very fancy.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Very hot dog. Specific.

[Christy Lee]

Certain. Certain.

[Dave Landau]

Kind of a.

[Tom Griswold]

Kind of a sl.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Yes, yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Kind of a working class hot dog and a bougie mustard.

[Christy Lee]

It's.

[Tom Griswold]

That's. That defines you.

[Christy Lee]

It's a nod to my White trash history and also my station in life currently. Yes, exactly.

[Tom Griswold]

We had a request for the White Trash Expo piece.

[Christy Lee]

We can't.

[Tom Griswold]

We can't play it. I listened to it for the first time in a couple years. It's. It's. It's poetry.

[Christy Lee]

It's.

[Tom Griswold]

It is. It is so offensive.

[Christy Lee]

Just count yourself lucky if you have a copy of it at home and enjoy it there.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, you're going to.

[Chick McGee]

So offensive.

[Tom Griswold]

Dig up the cd.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Really? Oh, it's great. Great.

[Chick McGee]

Well, that can't be offense.

[Christy Lee]

Well, I don't think it's offensive, but I don't think you're offensive, so.

[Chick McGee]

Thank you.

[Tom Griswold]

Not one to judge, really.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Anyway.

[Tom Griswold]

Anyway, I think the medals are super cool for the Olympics.

[Christy Lee]

They have pieces of the Eiffel Tower. I didn't know.

[Tom Griswold]

That's great.

[Christy Lee]

They took pieces of the Eiffel Tower out and replaced them with other pieces. How do they do that?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, the same way they fix bridges or anything else.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, there it is.

[Chick McGee]

What's.

[Tom Griswold]

There's. The metal.

[Chick McGee]

Looks like garbage.

[Christy Lee]

It looks like. It looks like an air filter.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, it sure does.

[Christy Lee]

A little bit.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. You know what? If I want. I go, no, thanks, and hand it right back.

[Sam Miller]

That's.

[Tom Griswold]

And it's very large. Bigger than a tennis ball.

[Christy Lee]

Now, now, is it true, Is it flatter that the.

[Tom Griswold]

Good point. Fair, Fair point.

[Christy Lee]

Is it true that the Polish athletes, when they receive their gold medals.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, my God.

[Tom Griswold]

To get them brown. So you can do that old joke. Dust that off, will you?

[Chick McGee]

And that joke's very good. I don't care who you put. I don't care who you put in the place of.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

Very, very good.

[Christy Lee]

The French will get their gold medals, bronze.

[Chick McGee]

Yes, yes.

[Tom Griswold]

That's the thing.

[Chick McGee]

Anybody can use their. Yes, yes.

[Christy Lee]

The Americans are so stupid.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, right. Yes, of course.

[Christy Lee]

Let's have some fun.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, I have a question about. No, the Paris Olympics. It's going to be the first one to feature break dancing.

[Christy Lee]

That's a real thing?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Do you bring your own cardboard? How does that work?

[Chick McGee]

I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

You have to use.

[Christy Lee]

I'm guessing.

[Tom Griswold]

Can they can the cardboard have like it's a cut up box. Could it have an ad for something?

[Christy Lee]

I bet it does. And I bet it's.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey look, gal.

[Christy Lee]

Olympic sanctioned.

[Pat Godwin]

I always thought that the cardboard was.

[Chick McGee]

To protect you from the concrete in the street. Yeah, but if you have a dance floor, you're fine.

[Tom Griswold]

You're fine. Oh, they're doing a dance floor. I would assume it's not street enough for me.

[Christy Lee]

You want them out in the street?

[Tom Griswold]

No, I want them not in the Olympics.

[Chick McGee]

Just outside of a bistro on a corner. Hey, look, it's the Olympics. Pardon me, Is that the Olympics?

[Tom Griswold]

Look, there's some guy with a boom box.

[Christy Lee]

No, he's. He's infatuated with the metal situation. But he doesn't want break dancing to be a part of the.

[Tom Griswold]

They're watering it down.

[Chick McGee]

I wonder about the music on that.

[Tom Griswold]

It's a guy with a boom box.

[Chick McGee]

Do they get to pick like the figure skaters do or whatever? Yeah, that's what I would expecting fees and stuff like that.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, they can afford it.

[Christy Lee]

Well, they do. They use music in the skating competition.

[Chick McGee]

How much does that cost?

[Christy Lee]

It's a lot. A dollar 99aminute.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I see.

[Christy Lee]

Elsewhere in sports, authorities in Nepal say people climbing Mount Everest will now have to bring their feces back to base camp for disposal.

[Chick McGee]

Come on with this.

[Tom Griswold]

Isn't there like a crevice you could heave it in?

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

Due to extreme temperatures, excrement left on Everest does not fully degrade.

[Chick McGee]

Just frozen crap up there.

[Christy Lee]

Officials estimate There are about 3 tons of human waste on the mountain.

[Chick McGee]

3 tons?

[Tom Griswold]

Who did that math of human. I'd like to see that that story. Problem climbers must 1700 people have climbed Everest. The average poop ways.

[Christy Lee]

Hang on a second. Who is. Is this a Sherpa?

[Tom Griswold]

Who is this? This is some jackass that. Making more dumb rules we don't need.

[Christy Lee]

Climbers must now buy poop bags, much like you would for your puppy at base camp, which will be checked upon their return.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, that's a great gig. Well, I used to be a Sherpa. Now I. I collect the poop bags from the climbers. The ones that make it back. The dead ones, you know.

[Christy Lee]

Local chairman Mingma Sherpa told the BBC our mounts are our mountains. There's so much poop they've begun to sink and stink. He added, we're getting complaints that human stools are visible on rocks. And some cliers are because some climbers are getting sick.

[Chick McGee]

Now there's puke. Too.

[Christy Lee]

Now there's puke. Oh, now, Jess, you had a question.

[Chick McGee]

About the poop up there. I just didn't think you were supposed.

[Pat Godwin]

To expose any part of your skin.

[Chick McGee]

While you're out there. So how do you.

[Tom Griswold]

You have to defecate, obviously.

[Chick McGee]

Well, I. I know. I'm just curious of what you do.

[Tom Griswold]

Do you.

[Chick McGee]

Is there a hole in your pants?

[Tom Griswold]

Do you. No. You drop trout quickly and go.

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

But then you could get.

[Christy Lee]

You get burnt on your body.

[Chick McGee]

I would think you would get wind, burn or something.

[Tom Griswold]

That's part of the deal. You want to go up to a breakfast or not? I want to go to the top of the world to leave a couple.

[Chick McGee]

Of turds up there for $90,000. People climb that thing and go through that.

[Tom Griswold]

Several die, usually every year.

[Chick McGee]

Well, have you seen the ones of people climbing and the bodies just like sliding down the mountain as they're climbing up?

[Tom Griswold]

You think that. You think that'd be a priority? Wouldn't that be a priority, really, bringing the bodies back rather than the turds of the.

[Chick McGee]

That's where I would start. Yeah. With the bodies.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm guessing because they have those big groups going up. They probably all poop in the same place. Place. So it's probably a field of. So I can see their point.

[Christy Lee]

But then you gotta.

[Tom Griswold]

You gotta carry it with you, though. That's what's really.

[Christy Lee]

I think 90 grand is probably a bargain. I think it's. Is it more than that? Yeah. I want to say it's six figures.

[Tom Griswold]

Wouldn't you say at some point you'd be at a place where there's a big crevasse. You can just heave it over.

[Chick McGee]

Yes. And you can do that with the bodies, too.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, Toss them in there.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Well, there you go.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah, but you can.

[Chick McGee]

Well, better.

[Tom Griswold]

Look, if you go. If you're taking a chance, you know, doing that, you're taking a chance, you should sign a waiver saying, hey, look, if I die up there, throw me in the crevasse.

[Pat Godwin]

Are these people like the people that.

[Chick McGee]

Do, you know, the. The fit stuff, and they jump on the boxes and they flip the tires like that's all they talk about, right?

[Christy Lee]

The CrossFit.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

And the people that climb this.

[Tom Griswold]

So many people do it. This probably. We could probably recycle all those plastic grocery bags that we take. Finally, something to do with them. Hey, wait a minute. Save. Those are going to Everest for the turds. Coming up in just a few minutes. Comedian Dan St. Paul. Have a segment with him. Coming. Coming up in just a couple of seconds here on the Bob and Tom Show. Welcome to the Jungle Clones.

[Chick McGee]

It's the Jim Rome show podcast, the.

[Tom Griswold]

Greatest and loyal fan base ever. You, the clones. It all starts with the jungle. We're in it to win it and I'm in it to go as hard as I possibly can, everybody to make.

[Dave Landau]

Sure that you clones get the best.

[Tom Griswold]

Possible product every single day.

[Dave Landau]

Day one, all in.

[Tom Griswold]

Let's freaking go. The Jim Rome Show.

[Chick McGee]

Follow and listen on your favorite platform.

[Tom Griswold]

More of the Bob and Tom show now. This is Christopher in the Bob and Tom studios. The gang is back in here live on Monday morning. Here's a segment with one of our faves, comedian Dan St. Paul. He's talking about baseball announcers.

[Christy Lee]

I'm Chick Magee. Here's Tom with a special guest. Tom, hello. Sorry to bother you.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I'm sorry. I lost my notes.

[Christy Lee]

I know you did.

[Pat Godwin]

What are you looking for, buddy?

[Christy Lee]

Could you be ready one time?

[Tom Griswold]

The slang term, is it sniz?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, sniz now. Oh, we have a great guest in the studio, a legend on this show. He is comedian Dan St. Paul from San Francisco, California. Hi, Dan, how are you?

[Dave Landau]

I am comedian. If you laugh, if you don't laugh, welcome to my TED Talk.

[Tom Griswold]

Dan is famous on the show for a classic. Classic, the first baseball game. Great piece of work. And you are a long time baseball fan.

[Dave Landau]

I know, I'm a nut. I'm a baseball nut still to this day. Absolutely. I love baseball. I love listening to baseball. Baseball to me is soothing. It's, it's like that, you know, calm that app on your thing. That's if I can listen play by play, that, that does it for me, you know, because I love what baseball announcers do. They can tell you the same thing six times and make you think you only heard it once. No score here in the top of the third. Giants nothing, Dodgers nothing. A line of O1 and O for the Gian, 020 for the Dodgers as we're scoreless through two with neither team able to muster any kind of offense so far in this 00 tie.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, it's funny because we have to do that in our own way.

[Christy Lee]

Exactly.

[Tom Griswold]

Stretch a little bit.

[Pat Godwin]

Stretch every day.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, we, we've talked to various baseball announcers about rain delays and they really have to be able to kind of go off on. They do any topic.

[Chick McGee]

They do.

[Dave Landau]

I mean, Vin Scully could do it because he had all, all those great memories and all that stuff. Know somebody new. It's Tough. It's tough. It's got to be real tough.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you ever have any desire to do that?

[Dave Landau]

No, no. But I love doing it. I've gotten to do it actually on, on, on the field and whatnot for like one of these old classic baseball games. You know, it's. It's a different league with different rules and whatnot. And. But there were ex MLB players who were there. Vince Coleman was there, Jeff Cant, a bunch of others. It was a lot of fun. But no, I'd never gotten into the booth. But I don't know if I. Because they're so good, you know, they're good. We have a great win. We had John Miller in San Francisco, who's. Who did the ESPN Sunday night games for a long time with Joe Morgan. He's fantastic.

[Tom Griswold]

You still get to go to the games? I do.

[Dave Landau]

I go to the games all the time. I don't know a season ticket holder anymore, but I, I do go at least 10 games a year.

[Tom Griswold]

Do you go alone?

[Dave Landau]

No, I'll go with Roy, you know, my son. Cara goes with me. We both, we all love the Giants. Everybody loves.

[Chick McGee]

And that ballpark is just beautiful.

[Dave Landau]

Oracle park is probably one of the most beautiful parks. I mean, it's right there on the bay. You know, ball goes into the drink. It's fantastic.

[Chick McGee]

Have you ever been in the water watching from out or, you know, waiting for a ball, rather? Oh, no, I've never been one of.

[Dave Landau]

Those guys in a kayak.

[Chick McGee]

No.

[Dave Landau]

I'm not that rabid, you know, I've been bitten. You know that. But those guys are incredible.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Anybody ever gotten beaned in their kayak.

[Chick McGee]

And I've not seen that.

[Tom Griswold]

Do they have a lifeguard?

[Dave Landau]

No, the bulbs. Yeah, they should, they should have somebody out.

[Tom Griswold]

Looks like you got Ray Chapman out there in the boat.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Have you ever heard anyone miss the point so entirely misses the point? Lifeguard and McCovey co.

[Tom Griswold]

Dan, how do.

[Chick McGee]

You like the new, you know, the, the, the clock and the.

[Dave Landau]

I like it.

[Tom Griswold]

Except.

[Dave Landau]

Except you feel cheated sometimes. You know, you sit down, you. It's an hour later, you got to go home. Yeah, it's kind of weird, you know, we have the A's across from the bay from us who are not doing well. Their attendance is really low. In fact, I went to a game and I got hit by the T shirt cannon six times. I grab several different usherettes to do the Kiss Cam. So I was, you know, it's sad, but they're moving to Vegas, so.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, San Francisco's in the news a lot lately. I know not in a good way. You live there, so.

[Chick McGee]

I do.

[Tom Griswold]

And you love it.

[Pat Godwin]

But I do.

[Chick McGee]

We hope you wiped your feet on the way in.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Dave Landau]

Well, you know, all I can say is great, you know, everybody stay away more for me. You know, the downtowns in, in all. All the cities are tough time. San Francisco especially, because we're so tech heavy. And a lot of those people after Covid never came back.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Dave Landau]

So all those, A lot of those buildings are becoming empty. A lot of the. Of course, all the businesses around them are becoming empty. So it becomes, you know, an easy place for homeless people to go and hang out. And so that's why, you know, there's been a lot of hubbub about that. And San Francisco also is, you know, very kind to those who are not St. Francis, those who are. Who are having a tough time. There's lots of programs and whatnot. And the weather, the weather. Never. Hardly ever below 50, hardly ever above 80. So there's a lot of reason to come to San Francisco if you're a homeless person. So, yeah, I can see why people are upset, but that's basically the downtown area, not the rest of the. Not the rest of the city.

[Tom Griswold]

You've lived there, you've lived there a long time.

[Dave Landau]

I was born and raised in San Francisco. Mama was a cable car. Papa was a sourdough.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, that's San Francisco. Dan St. Paul is our guest. And I referenced the first baseball game. An absolute classic bit of comedy, writing and delivering, etc, etc from Dan. And we'll get to that in a minute perhaps, but right now we turn to Christy Lee at the Bob and Tom news desk.

[Pat Godwin]

According to a new scientific report, artificial intelligence can determine a person's actual age simply by looking at their chest. Specifically, researchers say AI can tell a patient's age after examining chest X X rays, marking a significant leap ahead in medical imaging. The breakthrough paves the way for improved early detection of several diseases.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, Pat.

[Pat Godwin]

What's Pat got to do with this?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, AI can now find out your real age.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, that's not good.

[Tom Griswold]

That's kind of a mystery. And it will remain one. So. But it's, it's. When it's. They say chess, they mean like an.

[Pat Godwin]

X X ray, right? Not by looking at you.

[Tom Griswold]

Take off your shirt, ma'am. I'd say 75. Whoa.

[Christy Lee]

What was that noise you made before you said.

[Chick McGee]

The floor cold on your nipples?

[Tom Griswold]

I'm a little tired of hearing about.

[Pat Godwin]

AI Yeah, we'll Get used to it.

[Tom Griswold]

But it's not going away.

[Pat Godwin]

Nope. It's not.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. And the. And I think they've won the battle of not using periods in AI.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, of course, Tom. You're not going to win that.

[Christy Lee]

Was irritated by no.

[Tom Griswold]

Because it looks like it says Al.

[Christy Lee]

Well, now that we know it doesn't stop talking.

[Pat Godwin]

How often do you see the word Al?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, K. Line.

[Christy Lee]

Sure.

[Dave Landau]

Al Raboski.

[Pat Godwin]

Who's Al? K. Line.

[Tom Griswold]

I thought I'd do a baseball team.

[Dave Landau]

First baseman for Detroit Tigers.

[Chick McGee]

The mad Hungarian.

[Dave Landau]

Al Raboski. The mad Hungarian for the Cardinals. That's right.

[Christy Lee]

He was on. He did. Broadcaster.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, for sure. Terrific. Al.

[Pat Godwin]

Professor is the only Al I know.

[Tom Griswold]

And you know that Al. Well, I do.

[Pat Godwin]

Al Jr. Yeah, I call him AI. Junior said don't know anything Tuesday.

[Dave Landau]

Sure.

[Tom Griswold]

It's just irritating that the. The. The techies insist on changing it. It's like all the misspellings and rap. It just.

[Christy Lee]

Would you feel better had they checked with you first?

[Tom Griswold]

No, I'd feel better if they did a period I. Period. Period.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

But it's. It's a lost cause. It's.

[Dave Landau]

Yeah, it's too much of a mouth.

[Christy Lee]

Ship has sailed.

[Tom Griswold]

Sorry. It's wrong. Crack. A crack in our culture. Meaning the end of the world.

[Pat Godwin]

Let's go back to something you can relate to. A ship retracing. Charles Darwin's famed voyage has set sail. That's right. Darwin set sail aboard the HMS Beagle in 1831.

[Tom Griswold]

Which we learned last week.

[Pat Godwin]

Yes. Asked around South America, went to Australia, New Zealand. Nearly 200 years after he embarked on that trip. That led of course, to the theory of evolution. The Dutch ship. Oh boy. Oster Child left England to begin a two year mission called Darwin 200. The schooner will serve as a floating laboratory on the sea and in port where approximately 200 young naturalists and conservationists from around the world. World Will meet along the way. Sounds like a really cool thing.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, in this case, naturalist means scientists, not nudists, right?

[Pat Godwin]

Correct.

[Christy Lee]

Was anyone thinking nudist?

[Tom Griswold]

No. No. Much better story if you had 200 naked people and.

[Pat Godwin]

And conservationists.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. And why didn't they rename the boat like the Beagle 3 or something?

[Pat Godwin]

I don't know. I wish I did.

[Tom Griswold]

We were counting on you.

[Dave Landau]

We were counting on you.

[Tom Griswold]

Like the Galapagos. Something cool.

[Chick McGee]

The Galapagos.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, that'd be cool.

[Pat Godwin]

You don't like.

[Chick McGee]

What does it mean in Dutch? Do we know?

[Pat Godwin]

I have no idea.

[Tom Griswold]

It means everyone. It means half the stuff that Darwin Discovered the species are dead. They're extinct.

[Pat Godwin]

No, it's Dutch for beagle.

[Chick McGee]

Oh.

[Dave Landau]

Oh, I see.

[Tom Griswold]

Perfect. Of course, now we're. Now we're talking. Dan St. Paul is San Franciscan.

[Dave Landau]

I am. You know, I saw Tom. I want to ask you this. You're a big. You're a big classic rock fan.

[Tom Griswold]

Sure, yeah.

[Dave Landau]

Yeah, yeah. My wife and I went to see elo oh, cool. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Who is the elo? Anybody?

[Tom Griswold]

Electric light. It's Jeff Lynn and whoever he chooses. Yeah.

[Dave Landau]

But he's got one of the other guy. Original people, but a fantastic show. Great, great show.

[Chick McGee]

We.

[Dave Landau]

We took bart, which is the local subway, and everybody in our car. Car were baby boomers going to the show, except for two teenagers who had to be thinking, is the rest home on a field trip. One guy had his original ELO T shirt on, and he had gotten so large over the years, the O was just a straight line going across his chest. We get there, and we're walking across the parking lot from the BART station, and we're like the walking dead, you know, like almost dead, you know, approaching the arena and. And this. We're met by a squadron of representatives from the local cardiac care unit, and they're giving out coupons. Buy one stent, get one free. We. We get in. We get in, and there's a concession. And they're. They're selling, like, I think tapioca and soup. And there's a band playing, but it's not eel. And I went, oh, no. I got on my knees.

[Tom Griswold]

I went, oh, no.

[Dave Landau]

There's an opener. We'll never get home at a decent hour.

[Tom Griswold]

We're coming right back with the biggest breasts. And Peewee died. That's all coming up next hour. But in your next segment, comedian Ian Bagg. It's right here on the Bob and Tom Show.

[Pat Godwin]

Bob and Tom, you met Lala Kent on Vanderpump Rules.

[Tom Griswold]

Now Lala and her friends share everything.

[Pat Godwin]

On Give them Lala Bagel. Everybody. Everybody says, I say that weird. It has ruined my proposal story.

[Tom Griswold]

How Jason proposed, and she was like.

[Pat Godwin]

He brought in a bunch of bagels.

[Chick McGee]

I was like, I have to stop this.

[Pat Godwin]

I will punch you in the throat if you ever tell this story again.

[Tom Griswold]

And call it a bagel. Let me tell you now, when I tell the story, I go, he went.

[Pat Godwin]

And got breakfast.

[Chick McGee]

There you go.

[Tom Griswold]

Bagels. Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Watch what Lala is talking about on YouTube or search for Give them Lala wherever you listen.

[Tom Griswold]

This is the Bob and Tom Show. Welcome back. This is Christopher in The Bob and Tom Studios. Hope you're having a great Thursday morning. Comedian Ian Bagg checked in during this segment of the Best of the Bob and Tom Show.

[Christy Lee]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. Getting ready for that weekend. Friday starts the weekend.

[Chick McGee]

Tom.

[Pat Godwin]

We got breaking news, kids.

[Tom Griswold]

What?

[Christy Lee]

Breaking news.

[Pat Godwin]

Breaking news.

[Tom Griswold]

What's that?

[Pat Godwin]

Buxutawney Phil. Oh, we all know who Buxutawney Phil is. The renowned groundhog has predicted he's dead.

[Tom Griswold]

Right? They shot him.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, no. This is awful news.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, it's like a.

[Chick McGee]

That's Liberty Valor. It's an early spring.

[Pat Godwin]

That's exactly right. Phil has said it is an early spring this year to warm up.

[Sam Miller]

Yeah, I know.

[Chick McGee]

It's this.

[Christy Lee]

This.

[Chick McGee]

This groundhog doesn't know what he's doing.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, you don't know.

[Pat Godwin]

Could we just be positive? For what?

[Chick McGee]

I'm positive this thing doesn't know what it's doing.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I think we should go there one day.

[Tom Griswold]

Old fashioned. Old fashioned way of telling things.

[Christy Lee]

Broadcasting. Send me there. I'll go there.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, really?

[Pat Godwin]

Puxatani, Pennsylvania to Knobblers Gob.

[Christy Lee]

No, it's Gobblers Knob.

[Tom Griswold]

Noblers Knob. Gob is the weekend that certain people are playing.

[Chick McGee]

Drop button doing.

[Christy Lee]

But I'm intrigued.

[Pat Godwin]

Hobbler's Gobblers. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

And he's got buck teeth. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

The Knobbler's Gob would be.

[Chick McGee]

I think Gobbler's Knob is bad. More suggestive.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. That was a group in high school.

[Chick McGee]

I'm gonna gobble that knob.

[Christy Lee]

Ever had that done with.

[Tom Griswold]

With braces? With the. Let's see.

[Christy Lee]

Where was I asking?

[Tom Griswold]

What was I saying? Oh, I know. We have a guest in the studio. He is comedian Ian Bagg. He's hanging out with us. And now blackballed for. Well, keep it up, mister.

[Chick McGee]

Maybe another five, you know.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, speaking of black balls.

[Christy Lee]

More of a mocha, really.

[Chick McGee]

I think Groundhog Day is big here. Even bigger in France.

[Christy Lee]

Really?

[Chick McGee]

What? You know, what does the groundhog see.

[Christy Lee]

When they wake him up in the morning?

[Pat Godwin]

What?

[Chick McGee]

His chateau. Oh, the groundhog saw his chateau. Now there is six more weeks. Yeah, yeah. Let's not dice.

[Christy Lee]

Evidently he defecated on it. Chateau. That's what I got out of house.

[Tom Griswold]

Got it on his feet. Nice house. I'm sorry, Christy, you were saying?

[Pat Godwin]

Ace Cosby joke of the day, brought to you by Sleep number. That's right. Save 50% during the president's Day sale on a limited edition smart bed. Only at a Sleep Number store or Sleep number Dot com.

[Tom Griswold]

Love my sleep number bed. Thank you very much, Chris D. Ian Bag is our guest. Ian, ask a question before we go any further.

[Pat Godwin]

Sure.

[Tom Griswold]

What is it with presidents and beds and sales?

[Pat Godwin]

I don't know.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, that's a big thing.

[Pat Godwin]

That is a great question.

[Chick McGee]

Is there something that I don't know?

[Tom Griswold]

Because I'm about to become an American and might be on the test, and.

[Chick McGee]

I need to know.

[Tom Griswold]

You raise a good point. They don't do this in Canada. They don't. Prime Minister sale. We don't sell anything. Do you have a Prime Minister day?

[Chick McGee]

Every day is a Prime Minister day.

[Tom Griswold]

Every day he pushes his way into our lives.

[Chick McGee]

That's what he says.

[Tom Griswold]

You live in. You've been living United States for a long time. Do you. Are you an American? Officially? I'm about to be.

[Chick McGee]

I'm about to be kids. You can't stop me.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm taking the test.

[Chick McGee]

Well, welcome. Ian, do you. Congratulations.

[Christy Lee]

I thought you got in because of your wife. Right.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, she opened the door. Come on.

[Chick McGee]

Is it a hard test?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Apparently not. That's what everybody tells me, but they make it sound like it. Is everybody that I know that say. I think, I think they've, They've given that test to real.

[Pat Godwin]

To Americans who are born and raised here, and we can't pass it.

[Tom Griswold]

You were going to say real Americans. Thank you. Thank you, Christy.

[Chick McGee]

Not the fake ones like Ian ber. Imposter.

[Tom Griswold]

America.

[Sam Miller]

Welcome to America.

[Pat Godwin]

You were born judgment.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, they won't, they won't. They won't bury you here. You know, they want what? What? Oh, that's right. Yeah. Oh, you become a naturalized, they have to ship you back.

[Chick McGee]

You didn't know that? That's right.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, they'll take your taxes, but they.

[Chick McGee]

Won'T take your body.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, no, they gotta. I gotta ship them home.

[Chick McGee]

I'm gonna dirty up our soil, boy.

[Tom Griswold]

That's right.

[Pat Godwin]

Do you get a tax credit if you take the test?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I, I don't know. I, I, I, I, I think all it is.

[Chick McGee]

I think I get. I don't know what I get.

[Pat Godwin]

Okay.

[Chick McGee]

I know what I get.

[Pat Godwin]

What?

[Chick McGee]

I get Social Security at some point, yes, theoretically.

[Tom Griswold]

And my wife, you've paid so much.

[Chick McGee]

You get that, you get that paperwork.

[Tom Griswold]

Filled out, and I'm just like, okay, I love you. Now, let's see, where were we? Oh, I know. We were talking to Christie Lee at the news desk. What happened?

[Pat Godwin]

A monkey has been recaptured after going missing in the Scottish Highlands for over five years. Days According to the BBC, the seven year old male Japanese macaque named.

[Tom Griswold]

Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. Can you say. Say macaque with a Scottish accent?

[Pat Godwin]

I can't do that.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Can't find. Can't find macaque.

[Chick McGee]

You can take our lives but you'll never take macaque.

[Christy Lee]

You can have macaque. What do you pry it out of.

[Tom Griswold]

My cold dead hands Once you escape.

[Pat Godwin]

From the Highland Wife Wildlife park at King Craig, Stephanie Bunyan who lives nearby, barely can walk.

[Christy Lee]

Stephanie Bunyan, that's real.

[Tom Griswold]

Really?

[Christy Lee]

Paul? Yes, Paul's sister.

[Pat Godwin]

Yep. She lives nearby. Spotted the primate helping himself to a bird feeder in her yard.

[Christy Lee]

How's it going?

[Pat Godwin]

And contacted the Royal Zoological Society of Scotland.

[Tom Griswold]

Knowing a monkey, that bird feeder is probably now full of monkey seed.

[Pat Godwin]

Drone team observed the animals that are monkey seed.

[Tom Griswold]

A monkey dooo.

[Christy Lee]

Monkeys are bad.

[Tom Griswold]

Those monkeys are bad. The cacks aren't known for doing that.

[Pat Godwin]

A drone team observed the animal till it was shot team with a tranquilizer dart and taken back to the park.

[Chick McGee]

All right.

[Nick Novicki]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow. Yeah. Monkeys are awful. They bite.

[Pat Godwin]

They are not awful.

[Tom Griswold]

They poop. They throw.

[Chick McGee]

If you get enough of them on a typewriter Tom, you'll get a book be completely unreadable.

[Tom Griswold]

Book.

[Chick McGee]

I've seen it in old movie.

[Christy Lee]

Unless you can speak monkey. Speak and read monkey. But other than that.

[Pat Godwin]

A Brazilian woman facing charges after completely bald.

[Chick McGee]

She's an American woman, but we described her.

[Pat Godwin]

Brazilian woman. Yeah. Is facing charges with police at Bogota after find after they found 130 poison dart frogs in her luggage.

[Chick McGee]

What is going on here?

[Pat Godwin]

I don't know. The animals which were dehydrated and struck dressed were discovered in small film canisters.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh.

[Pat Godwin]

Local police said the amphibians can catch up to a thou can fetch up to $1,000 each on the sellable market for people wanting to buy a poison dart frog.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, the people want to buy all kinds of crazy stuff. It's just that wouldn't the film canisters give it away in as much as nobody uses. Nobody uses film anymore.

[Pat Godwin]

Harlequin frogs, also known as poison dart frogs, measure less than the size of a human thumb.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh.

[Pat Godwin]

Their skin glands produce a highly toxic poison though which has in the past been used by indigenous people to coat the lips of darts that they use for hunting. By the way, harlequin frogs are an incredibly endangered species.

[Chick McGee]

So slutty harlequins, those harlequins, soft core slutty.

[Tom Griswold]

They'll kill you, right?

[Chick McGee]

No, they're A romance noddle.

[Tom Griswold]

That'll read you to be the other. They're super dangerous.

[Pat Godwin]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

Will they kill a man if you hold one?

[Pat Godwin]

I don't know. I don't know if it'll kill a man.

[Tom Griswold]

This isn't the same stuff that. This isn't the stuff that they make that. That hallucinogenic. From that wrong frog. People were licking one. They were licking the toads.

[Chick McGee]

Get your frogs right.

[Tom Griswold]

Come on. Okay. I told you so.

[Chick McGee]

Racist.

[Tom Griswold]

Sorry. I don't know. Who was it? Who am I thinking about? Where? Aaron Rodgers. Wasn't he licking the toads or something? Was that.

[Christy Lee]

That's ayahuasca again.

[Tom Griswold]

Ayahuasca. I went. That's where I went to camp. We do hallucigens and vomit.

[Chick McGee]

Hello, Father.

[Pat Godwin]

Speaking of animals, researchers say a live newborn great white shark was spotted in the wild for the very first time.

[Chick McGee]

It's brand new, of course. It was just spotted for the first time.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, good point.

[Pat Godwin]

You just got the look for me and I very rarely give that to you.

[Chick McGee]

You know what? I liked it.

[Pat Godwin]

Did you? Wildlife filmmaker Carlos Guana and UC Reverse site.

[Christy Lee]

Hey, bat crap.

[Chick McGee]

There comes old back crap.

[Pat Godwin]

And UC Riverside biology doctoral student Philip Stearns were scanning the waters near Santa Barbara when they captured footage of a white 5 foot long shark pup. Stearns said, we enlarged the images, put them in slow motion and realized the white layer was being shed from the body as it was swimming. I believe it was a newborn great white shedding its embryonic layer.

[Chick McGee]

Wow.

[Pat Godwin]

That's pretty cool. He added, in my opinion, this one was likely hours, maybe one day old at most. That discovery was documented in a paper published in the journal Environmental Biology of Fishes. I'm sure you guys, they quickly killed.

[Chick McGee]

It so they could study it in the lab.

[Pat Godwin]

They did not.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I do have a question about your skill.

[Tom Griswold]

The guy was from UC Riverside, which is inland. That's not who you want studying your oceans.

[Chick McGee]

That's right.

[Tom Griswold]

They let him. They let him leave campus? Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

You want him at UC San Diego?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, I want him on the coast. Did you say he was five feet long?

[Pat Godwin]

The pup was. It's a baby shark. Yes.

[Christy Lee]

How big had the mother have to be?

[Pat Godwin]

Well, they're pretty big. Great white sharks, 12 to 20ft. Guana said where white sharks give birth is one of the holy grails of shark science. No one's ever been able to pinpoint where the babies are born. No one's ever seen a newborn baby shark alive.

[Tom Griswold]

That's crazy.

[Pat Godwin]

Point.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

How have they not I don't know.

[Chick McGee]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

In the ocean. Cool. That's why it's big. Want to hear the song?

[Pat Godwin]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Sorry, I couldn't resist. God, that's awful.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Pat Godwin]

How many times did you hear that in your life?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, it's. It's. Fortunately, that's over now. Today is Groundhog Day and you just announced Puxatoni. Phil. What was it again? Saw the shadow. What is it? Did not see the shadow.

[Pat Godwin]

So early spring.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, I'll remember that in April 11th when it's 10 degrees out.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Now. And you remember in the movie Chris, have you seen the movie Roundhouse?

[Pat Godwin]

I have.

[Tom Griswold]

Remember this? This is the alarm clock every morning.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Great. Sonny and Sheri Sunny wearing the fur vest.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I want to wait for the share part.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

God, I can't tell.

[Christy Lee]

They make sheriff sing flat. So Sunny doesn't seem so flat.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, Sunny. But you know, he had a restaurant down the street from my house and I prefer if you guys would talk very nicely about him.

[Chick McGee]

Good place.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

It was called Boneouth. It's now called Nick's on second and it's fantastic.

[Tom Griswold]

I love to go there for a.

[Chick McGee]

A drink on a Sunday after work.

[Tom Griswold]

It was called Bonos. Bonos Y. Ah, Sonny Bono. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah. Sonny Bono.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

As opposed to what people would Not Bono from YouTube? No, it's a different guy, different person.

[Chick McGee]

That'd be great if it was. It was. Sonny.

[Tom Griswold]

Was the same person. Maybe the. The YouTube guy comes out with a fur vest on and they do a version of I got you, babe for the Sonny Bono. Oh, man, that'd be funny. Christy Lee, what's coming up?

[Pat Godwin]

Coming up. We have time to do this. Okay, go ahead. A Tennessee lawmaker hoping to make so called hot slaw an official state food. According to the Memphis Flyer, legislation supporting the idea has advanced in a House committee of the Tennessee General Assembly. A companion bill would make Cleveland, Tennessee the hot slaw capital of the state.

[Chick McGee]

Is it coleslaw? But spicy?

[Pat Godwin]

You're very, very much correct, by the way.

[Tom Griswold]

By the way, I'd like to point something out. A chick recently pointed out that he was a grown ass man before he realized that in the movie the wizard of Oz that the black and white parts, those were the guys that later on showed up as the wizard, etc. Etc. And you know, the lady on the.

[Christy Lee]

Bicycle, the scarecrow and the lion and the tin man.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm lost. Farmhands. I just wanted these things you find out as an adult.

[Pat Godwin]

What did you find out as an Adult.

[Tom Griswold]

I thought it was cold slaw.

[Pat Godwin]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

Why do you have a show that uses words I don't know. We're coming right back. We're going to find out about Tom's coffee and Peewee died. That's all. Next here on the Best of the Bob and Tom Show. Good morning.

[Christy Lee]

Don't wipe it on me, Marie.

[Chick McGee]

I don't know where you got. Don't wipe it on me, Marie. I don't know what it is I don't want it on my ankle I don't want it on my leg I don't want it on my new blue.

[Tom Griswold]

Jeans I don't want it on my.

[Chick McGee]

Tie I don't want it in my.

[Christy Lee]

My eyes.

[Sam Miller]

Don'T you know what I mean?

[Chick McGee]

Don't why I bet on me.

[Christy Lee]

I.

[Tom Griswold]

Don'T know, honey I don't know what you got it.

[Chick McGee]

I don't know what.

[Christy Lee]

It is.

[Tom Griswold]

Mr. Tomato.

[Chick McGee]

I don't want.

[Tom Griswold]

It on my ankle I don't want.

[Christy Lee]

It on my leg I don't want.

[Tom Griswold]

It I don't want it on my.

[Christy Lee]

New blue.

[Chick McGee]

I don't wanna know my.

[Tom Griswold]

Time I don't want it in my.

[Chick McGee]

Eyes I don't know what I mean.

[Tom Griswold]

Life it on me get it out of here.

[Christy Lee]

I don't know where you got it.

[Pat Godwin]

Hello, Marie.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, put it back in the salad. M Heywood bags the genius. This is the Bob and Tom show for a Thursday morning. Welcome back. This is Christopher in the Bob and Tom studios again. The gang is back in here live. Live on Monday morning. Here's a segment about Tom's coffee and Peewee died.

[Christy Lee]

Christy Lee is at the news desk.

[Pat Godwin]

Hi.

[Christy Lee]

Are you hearing me? There's Pat Godwin.

[Chick McGee]

Hi, Chick.

[Christy Lee]

There's Willie Griswold.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, what's going on, man?

[Christy Lee]

Ace Cosby's here. Hey, there's Josh Arnold.

[Chick McGee]

Hi there.

[Christy Lee]

I'm Chick. Here's Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

I hit the wrong button.

[Christy Lee]

Sorry again.

[Tom Griswold]

No, when I was.

[Pat Godwin]

So. What's your. What's your coffee?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. What happened?

[Pat Godwin]

What happened?

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know what button I hit, but it's got six pumps of brown sugar.

[Chick McGee]

What that is.

[Christy Lee]

That sounds like something Godwin would.

[Tom Griswold]

I have. I have no idea how that happened.

[Pat Godwin]

I didn't even know you could get.

[Chick McGee]

I thought that was intentional.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no.

[Chick McGee]

I thought you were going. That's why you love your iced coffee so much. I was wondering how come it tastes so good. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Brown sugar.

[Pat Godwin]

Brown sugar.

[Chick McGee]

Sugar. Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know how this. I was trying to use the app. I'm not Very good.

[Pat Godwin]

Does it taste good?

[Christy Lee]

How come.

[Chick McGee]

Give that a sip.

[Christy Lee]

Tastes so good.

[Chick McGee]

See if we have to immediately cut off your left foot.

[Tom Griswold]

It is sweet.

[Chick McGee]

Have you just abandoned your whole heart diet? Because I see you got this. You're putting salt. You're putting no salt. You're not supposed to use either of those.

[Tom Griswold]

No, this is. This is a mistake. I hit the wrong. I've never seen.

[Christy Lee]

But he's not drinking it because it's a mistake. And he might be drinking it. But it's a mistake.

[Tom Griswold]

I made an error. Sorry. We have. We have to explain that our normal person who does the coffee runs isn't here. So I had to step in and clear.

[Chick McGee]

He's visiting his son in a different state. Am I the only selfless person here? Not married, no kids. I'm free to come in whenever I need. Are you really free, Josh? Thank you for your sacrifices, Josh.

[Christy Lee]

Isn't freedom just another word for nothing left to lose? Huh?

[Chick McGee]

Nothing.

[Christy Lee]

Nothing.

[Chick McGee]

And if I could remember the next.

[Tom Griswold]

Lyric, nothing if it ain't free. Kind of repeats itself. Thank you. Kris Kristofferson. Sad news from the world of entertainment. Paul Rubens.

[Pat Godwin]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

Inventor of the sandwich.

[Pat Godwin]

No, He's Pee Wee Herman. Or was. Reubens died Sunday night after a six year struggle with cancer. A struggle he kept private. He was 70 years old. Reuben said in a statement with the announcement of his death. Quote, please accept my apology for not going public with what I've been facing the last six years. I've always felt a huge amount of love and respect from my friends, fans and supporters. I've loved you all so much and enjoyed making art for you.

[Chick McGee]

I loved Paul Rubin.

[Christy Lee]

You haven't seen him in Blow, the Johnny Depp movie. You need to go back and watch that. He's.

[Chick McGee]

He was a terrific actor.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, it was. Right. But Peewee was just the greatest.

[Chick McGee]

Yes. HBO special. Wow. Hysterical.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. I hope he pops out of the casket and shouts.

[Pat Godwin]

Made you look.

[Chick McGee]

I hope. What? He rests in peace.

[Tom Griswold]

Maybe. Remember how the furniture all talked? So maybe he'll have like.

[Christy Lee]

Cassie.

[Tom Griswold]

Cassie.

[Chick McGee]

The casket. Hi.

[Christy Lee]

What a disrespect.

[Tom Griswold]

No, it's a disrespect. That's what he'd want. He'd probably want some giant Rube Goldberg device delivering the casket into the hole.

[Chick McGee]

Danny Elfman playing the music.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

You think his nickname was Rube?

[Tom Griswold]

What's up, Rube?

[Chick McGee]

Ruby, did you just call a grave a hole? Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Just saying. Are they going to be selling all that cool stuff like the talking chair and wouldn't you want to have that.

[Chick McGee]

Cherry, first off, her name is Cherry.

[Christy Lee]

The body isn't even cold yet.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, and I don't think Cherry speaks without a person in it.

[Christy Lee]

You thought that chair really talked, didn't you?

[Tom Griswold]

Could be kind of a sad estate sale. All the talking.

[Chick McGee]

Screeny. Remember Screeny? He would jump in our magic screen. He would jump in a magic screen. And I watched all those. Man, I loved him. I watched his first Letterman last night. Boy, was that funny.

[Tom Griswold]

He was great. He was on as peewee. Yeah, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Like doing stand up and throwing stuff at the crowd.

[Pat Godwin]

It was amazing. Yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

He did a whole bunch of. That was. That was his very first one. He did a whole bunch of shows with Letterman. Great stuff.

[Chick McGee]

So good.

[Tom Griswold]

So sad to see him go. Now we have on a much lighter note.

[Pat Godwin]

Are you done over there, Chick?

[Tom Griswold]

Stupid world record.

[Christy Lee]

A Lebanese singer has broken the gift.

[Chick McGee]

Her sexuality has nothing to do with me.

[Pat Godwin]

Lebanese nationality.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. I mean, she likes girls. Am I the only woke one here? I love woke. Josh.

[Christy Lee]

They have broken the Guinness World record.

[Tom Griswold]

All right.

[Christy Lee]

For the longest cape.

[Pat Godwin]

Longest cape.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

What do they do with this thing? See, because you think that'd be like a superhero somewhere, right? You know, cape band, Cape man. He trips people.

[Chick McGee]

You really went to the writers room with Cape Man.

[Christy Lee]

Dr. Strange's cape flies around and can. And almost another character has a real personality.

[Chick McGee]

I believe that's actually a cloak, which is slightly different from.

[Pat Godwin]

What is the difference between a cloak and a cape?

[Tom Griswold]

A collar. I believe that's the difference.

[Chick McGee]

I'm not bad.

[Pat Godwin]

Is good.

[Chick McGee]

That's a good guess.

[Tom Griswold]

Chick.

[Pat Godwin]

You could pull off a cape.

[Christy Lee]

The performer spells their name. N A J, W A Najwa.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm guessing.

[Christy Lee]

Whatever.

[Tom Griswold]

She's super famous.

[Christy Lee]

One of the most beloved female singers of the Pan Arab region.

[Chick McGee]

Let's not be stupid.

[Tom Griswold]

She sold millions of albums.

[Christy Lee]

Millions of albums.

[Tom Griswold]

Very famous.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, but very, very famous.

[Tom Griswold]

Doesn't matter.

[Chick McGee]

Unless it's very popular in America.

[Tom Griswold]

Sure, they're sp.

[Chick McGee]

Robbie Williams.

[Christy Lee]

This is kind of true.

[Tom Griswold]

Probably certain places where. Good point. Well taken. Cliff Richard. It's gonna be hard to ask Cliff.

[Christy Lee]

All right. To celebrate the launch of her new album entitled Charisma. K A R I Z M A.

[Chick McGee]

That's unfortunate. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

She put on a cape measuring 182.7ft long.

[Chick McGee]

Wow. Now, long cape.

[Tom Griswold]

Let's face it. Isn't that basically just cleaning the floor at this point?

[Christy Lee]

So she enters a room and then.

[Tom Griswold]

So it's two thirds of a football field.

[Christy Lee]

Her cape enters the Room.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow. What would Capeman superpower be?

[Christy Lee]

Well, the cape would have to have properties and probably bulletproof.

[Tom Griswold]

His nemesis would be the escalator. The elevator.

[Christy Lee]

That is.

[Chick McGee]

It's such. Such a funny running joke in the movie the Incredibles that all the guys with capes get sucked away and die in the planes and everything. Have you guys not seen the Incredibles? I have. I just didn't remember that bit. It's a very funny bit in a Pixar movie. Maybe talking about it on a radio show isn't that funny.

[Christy Lee]

I don't find it funny.

[Tom Griswold]

Especially we've talked about who can get away with wearing a cape. Yeah, I think Chick can in contemporary culture. Chick. That would be a great affectation for you.

[Christy Lee]

I'm not wearing a cape.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, that'd be perfect for you.

[Christy Lee]

I might.

[Tom Griswold]

And then you never say anything about it. You just walk into. Walk into a cocktail party wearing a cape.

[Christy Lee]

I don't want you to get your hopes up, but I think I might start carrying a cane. I haven't decided.

[Tom Griswold]

That's great. Were you with me when we met Wolfman Jack?

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

And he had the cape on. Yeah. Wolfman Jack wore one of those sort of chicken cowboy hats. It's kind of flat.

[Christy Lee]

He was at a buffet, right?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, he was at a buff. I met him a couple times. He was at a buffet. Chain smoking. Chain smoking. Lucky Strikes.

[Christy Lee]

Have you tried these sugar biscuits?

[Chick McGee]

He brought out more crab legs.

[Tom Griswold]

Toward the end. The Wolf man, he pulled. He pulled a Brando.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Got very big.

[Christy Lee]

Hello there.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello there, Wolf Man. It's good to see you.

[Chick McGee]

He's saying that to a Sunday. Starts melting. Where you going?

[Tom Griswold]

Were you with us in that thing where Wolfman was there? Yeah. Bob and I were at this big event, radio thing and Wolfman.

[Christy Lee]

We weren't invited.

[Tom Griswold]

We're in a black cape.

[Chick McGee]

I would have loved to have met him.

[Tom Griswold]

Who else can wear. Who else? Someone else wears one. Right.

[Chick McGee]

Orson Welles.

[Pat Godwin]

Dracula.

[Christy Lee]

He was buried in a black.

[Chick McGee]

My dad.

[Pat Godwin]

Your dad wore a cape at times.

[Chick McGee]

Are you serious?

[Christy Lee]

No, no.

[Chick McGee]

He wore one to a wedding once in the 60s.

[Christy Lee]

See? He wore one to a wedding.

[Chick McGee]

I'll never forget it. My grandma had a cape because she wanted one for going to the movies. She would often get very cold in the theater.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, that makes sense.

[Christy Lee]

Your grandmother was really high maintenance, wasn't she?

[Chick McGee]

I. I think so, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Didn't Vulcan Evil have one on his outfit?

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, yes, he did.

[Tom Griswold]

There you go.

[Christy Lee]

And he had a walking stick. Yeah, right there. Bang.

[Chick McGee]

Kane, you're Gonna get one, huh?

[Tom Griswold]

Is there anybody right now that would.

[Chick McGee]

Wear a cape and probably like Machine Gun Kelly or one of those weirdos, you know, they're always getting into crazy stuff.

[Tom Griswold]

They could pull it off.

[Pat Godwin]

Who wears a cape?

[Tom Griswold]

Harry smells that isn't a superhero. Now, your grandmother, did she pass away before your grandfather?

[Chick McGee]

No.

[Christy Lee]

Really?

[Chick McGee]

Now. But my one grandmother did. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Chick McGee]

But this was my.

[Tom Griswold]

This was the ones at the nursing home.

[Chick McGee]

This was my mom's mom. No, she lived. My mom's mom lived in her house until she died.

[Tom Griswold]

The one that. With the cape. Yeah, I see, I see. The reason I'm asking is because there's the famous story about the funeral at the nursing home, which I've always loved of yours.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

We're forgetting the obvious. Elvis was a big cape. Cape wearer.

[Chick McGee]

Oh.

[Christy Lee]

For all his cape wearing, I never actually saw. I can't say I saw him in a cape.

[Pat Godwin]

Really.

[Christy Lee]

In any of the.

[Tom Griswold]

In the live concert films, he's wearing a cake.

[Pat Godwin]

Bela Lugosi was James Brown.

[Chick McGee]

I was gonna. Was James Brown a cloak or a cape or a robe?

[Pat Godwin]

He wore like a cape that might have been covered.

[Tom Griswold]

They would bring it out.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Off stage because he was so exhausted.

[Christy Lee]

But he sounded like Wolfman.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, he did.

[Tom Griswold]

In any event, this lady. Lady. And where is she from? Lebanon. She. She has the world's record for the world's longest cape. You see her entrance? Sadly, she came through a revolving door and was strangled to death.

[Christy Lee]

Who did that? Isadora Duncan. One of them got stuck in a wheel, right? Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Scarf. Okay, well, thank you very much.

[Christy Lee]

You know what she said?

[Chick McGee]

I bet she did.

[Tom Griswold]

What else is happening in sports?

[Christy Lee]

That's it, dude.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, sorry.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, we have.

[Pat Godwin]

This is what you're.

[Tom Griswold]

A sports addendum.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, we have this. I wanted to play this. I forgot to play it yesterday.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, bad stereo.

[Tom Griswold]

Is that the. Is this the 1910 Fruit Gum Company?

[Christy Lee]

I think it is. Yeah. I've been. I remember that being a lot better.

[Chick McGee]

Me too.

[Tom Griswold]

Because you were probably 10 years old, maybe.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, my palate wasn't refined.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much. We have Christy Lee at the Bob and Tom news desk. What's going on over there, Christy?

[Pat Godwin]

A researcher believes he has figured out we're gonna get to this story so Tom will stop talking about it. I'll make a so called freeze ray.

[Tom Griswold]

Professor, wouldn't you want to have that?

[Pat Godwin]

For what purpose?

[Tom Griswold]

It's like a flashlight. Sort of like a pistol. You walk up to somebody, all of a sudden they're Just frozen.

[Christy Lee]

Of all the rays you could choose, freeze would be way down.

[Pat Godwin]

Yes. The superhero Freeze guide never got a lot of.

[Tom Griswold]

What would you go with first?

[Christy Lee]

Like a disappearing ray?

[Tom Griswold]

Time Ray.

[Chick McGee]

Actor Ray Romano, a levitating ray.

[Tom Griswold]

Appreciate that.

[Pat Godwin]

Thank you, Ray.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much. Nicely done.

[Pat Godwin]

Professor Patrick Hopkins at the University of Virginia aims to create an on demand surface cooling device for electronics inside spacecraft and high altitude jets.

[Christy Lee]

I think I might be Ray's brother.

[Tom Griswold]

You have famous rays. Ray Manzarek of the Doors.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. On the top of everyone's mind.

[Chick McGee]

Stingray killed the Crocodile Hunter.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Ray Davies of the Kinks.

[Chick McGee]

Sure. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Ray Bradbury, right off the bat. Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

You don't like Ray Davies of the Kinks. You don't like the kinks.

[Chick McGee]

Ray Parker Jr.

[Christy Lee]

I didn't say I didn't like the Kinks.

[Pat Godwin]

Is that the Ghostbuster?

[Chick McGee]

Well, the singer of.

[Pat Godwin]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. I'm a big fan of rays.

[Pat Godwin]

Plasma can reach temperatures as hot as the surface of the sun. But when it strikes the surface, it actually chills before heating. What? Plasma can reach temperatures as hot as. Okay. During their experiments, Hopkins and his colleagues were able to reduce the temperature by several degrees and for a few microseconds. So they are now working with different gases to try and get a reaction that can be colder and last longer.

[Christy Lee]

You know how I know.

[Pat Godwin]

So we're doing a story about a Ray that worked for a few micro.

[Tom Griswold]

This is how.

[Christy Lee]

This is how I know.

[Pat Godwin]

Start.

[Christy Lee]

Christy, I'm from the Midwest. When she was saying that it hits a surface and it's cold, you make it really cool. A cooler out of that.

[Chick McGee]

What do you put in the cooler.

[Christy Lee]

Like beers or whatever you need. Whatever you need to check into a hotel. That's what I put.

[Tom Griswold]

And again, Chick and I are on the same page here. Why isn't there a thing like a microwave oven where you can put a Coke or a beer in there, press a button and it's.

[Pat Godwin]

There is you guys 10 seconds. I don't know if it's 10 seconds, but.

[Tom Griswold]

Well then they go. Then fix it.

[Christy Lee]

Make it.

[Chick McGee]

Mix it. Make it 10.

[Christy Lee]

Make it faster.

[Pat Godwin]

I'm going to buy you all one for right now. You're going to get your beverage.

[Tom Griswold]

You don't think a freeze ray would be super cool? It's a hot summer day. The kids ice cream cone starts melting. Oh, there we go. Take another lick there.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, there we go.

[Tom Griswold]

Sorry, sorry I froze your hand.

[Pat Godwin]

There you go. The rapid beverage and wine chiller. Tom, it's right there.

[Chick McGee]

I don't need one.

[Pat Godwin]

All right.

[Sam Miller]

Thank you, though.

[Chick McGee]

How does it work?

[Christy Lee]

Correct me if I'm wrong, but it seemed like she said that. Snot.

[Pat Godwin]

I am chills. Cans, juices, bottles, and everything from 77 degrees to 43 degrees in minutes.

[Christy Lee]

Minutes?

[Tom Griswold]

Minutes.

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

One at a time or can you do a whole case?

[Christy Lee]

10 seconds.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, for God's sake. I'm done with you people.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, I know Chris isn't. You're usually at home drinking alone. It doesn't matter that you can't get a whole case. Cool.

[Pat Godwin]

I drink red. I don't need it chilled.

[Tom Griswold]

Anything to get the mood. Anything to get the booze in you.

[Pat Godwin]

That's right.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, Arizona could use one of those freeze rays right now.

[Chick McGee]

Yes, yes. It's very hot.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I know.

[Chick McGee]

I forgot.

[Tom Griswold]

Josh is a denier.

[Chick McGee]

I'm not a Denier that it's hot. I'm just a. I've looked at the records. It's been hot.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, sure, it was when the dinosaurs died off.

[Chick McGee]

If you're trying to prove that global warming exists because it's hot In Arizona on August 1st, you got a few more things to prove. It's always been hot.

[Christy Lee]

Let's focus on getting this freeze ray up and running so they can incorporate it into a microwave box so we can make things faster. Colder. Faster.

[Tom Griswold]

Isn't there a. Is there a super villain or a superhero that has. Freeze. Raise power.

[Chick McGee]

Mr.

[Pat Godwin]

Freeze.

[Christy Lee]

Arnold Schwarzenegger. Oh, I didn't see that in the movies. Right? Wasn't that the.

[Tom Griswold]

I stopped going to the Batman movies after Nicholson left.

[Chick McGee]

After Nicholson left. Got good after that?

[Tom Griswold]

I doubt it.

[Chick McGee]

You said it like there's a Batman building somewhere. And Jackson Nicholson goes, fellas, I can't do this. I'm out.

[Pat Godwin]

Will you do me a favor?

[Chick McGee]

I'm with you, Jack.

[Pat Godwin]

Will you do me a favor?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Will you get the girls Finley and Hart and start watching all the superhero movies? And they love them so that dad over here will start having to watch all the superhero movies, too.

[Tom Griswold]

Stop it.

[Chick McGee]

The thing is, I've got a grenade.

[Tom Griswold]

What was that turd that I had to watch this summer?

[Pat Godwin]

I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

What was it Mario or what's the. What's. Keep talking.

[Chick McGee]

I'm gonna get heart attacked. I'm gonna ruin your life.

[Tom Griswold]

What is the three hour one? That's a cartoon. Oh, Spider Man. Oh, my God. They should make that movie illegal. It's so bad. Okay, well, wow.

[Chick McGee]

Brought joy to so many. Did it get great reviews?

[Pat Godwin]

Did the girls like, oh, my kids Loved it.

[Chick McGee]

It's a commercial and critical success.

[Christy Lee]

Never been a better movie made, per se.

[Tom Griswold]

Unbelievably overrated. What it says about our culture is sad.

[Chick McGee]

If he knew the implications of that statement.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, the biggest breasts are coming up here in just a couple of seconds, plus twins dress. You'll find out all about that in just a second. This is the Bob and Tom Show. We're rocking on the Bob and Tom show here for a Thursday morning. This is Christopher in the Bob and Tom studios. The biggest breasts are discussed and twins dress. We turned to Kristi Lee at the news desk.

[Pat Godwin]

An Illinois woman who has undergone three surgeries to attain huge 38 double G breasts says she's on a mission to have the biggest breast in the world.

[Chick McGee]

This is disgusting. This is crazy. What is her name so I can look at how gross this is?

[Pat Godwin]

Zenny Zounds.

[Chick McGee]

Zounds.

[Tom Griswold]

What's her name again?

[Pat Godwin]

Zenni Z E N I Zounds. Oh, yeah, she's rhymes with mounds. Only starts with a Z.

[Christy Lee]

No, she's from Sound Effectsville. That's what? That's zone.

[Pat Godwin]

She's 38. She first. She first received a breast implant back in 2021.

[Chick McGee]

Listen, listen. I'm sorry. Listen to this quote. My boobs weigh as much as a newborn. Oh, my gosh. What a way to put that.

[Pat Godwin]

At the time, the office worker wasn't planning on sporting enormous artificial assets, but she immediately knew she wanted a larger look. Following her first pretty procedure, she went to another surgeon who implanted expanders, which makes it possible to enlarge the breasts larger over time.

[Chick McGee]

I'm now referring to all boobs as expanders.

[Pat Godwin]

Her breasts now weigh 7 pounds, which is about the size of a newborn. You're right.

[Tom Griswold]

She wants them bigger and admits that.

[Pat Godwin]

Her heavy chest does make everyday activities a bit difficult.

[Chick McGee]

I'm not trying to be rude. Well, I don't care. Has she always been a woman?

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, I don't know. It doesn't say that.

[Chick McGee]

Her pictures, I mean. Yeah, just ugly.

[Pat Godwin]

They're Ms. Zones admits. Her heavy chest makes everyday activities difficult. There are things I used to enjoy doing, I just can't do anymore. She forlorn, forlornly admitted. I used to run four miles of trails a couple times times a week.

[Chick McGee]

Just a hideous.

[Pat Godwin]

I used to play acoustic guitar. That has gotten really uncomfortable and difficult to do while sitting down.

[Chick McGee]

Does she talk about. What did she used to do with her penis?

[Pat Godwin]

Eating is also a challenge.

[Chick McGee]

I. According to this picture, eating not a challenge.

[Pat Godwin]

Ms. Zounds now wants to transition into the entertainment industry. Josh saying, I want to have some of the biggest boobs in the world. They're what I'm. They are.

[Tom Griswold]

Are. They're enormous. It's disturbing. She could put those in a baby stroller and start her jogging again. Looks like the airbags in a Nissan Altima. They're very, very big.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, each their own, I guess.

[Tom Griswold]

Isn't there a point at which the skin will tear?

[Christy Lee]

You'd think that's why the expanders are.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, that's right.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

I mean, they do look like soccer balls inside her bra.

[Chick McGee]

They do.

[Pat Godwin]

They look very, very round. Very firm.

[Chick McGee]

Well put. Not my type.

[Tom Griswold]

Globular, fully packed, round, firm. Is she on Only Fans? I'm assuming she is, yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Okay, look at this one.

[Tom Griswold]

This is.

[Chick McGee]

I'm usually a heavy Nats guy.

[Christy Lee]

The farthest thing from nat you want to be, I would think.

[Chick McGee]

I want this woman just to suffocate me to death. My God.

[Pat Godwin]

She literally looks like she's sitting on an airplane with one of those pillows between her and the back seat.

[Chick McGee]

That is the.

[Pat Godwin]

The back of the seat in front of her so she can sleep.

[Chick McGee]

I. I do like that picture because it's hiding half of her face.

[Pat Godwin]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

I think it's interesting that she. These expanders. So is it like a valve stem on a tire? Did she just go to the gas station?

[Chick McGee]

And don't you hate when you always end up losing one of the caps for those? Oh, they're just.

[Pat Godwin]

Does the air. The air doesn't sneak out of it, does it, when you don't have the cap?

[Chick McGee]

No, no, I don. It's just an aesthetic thing. You want that covered?

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, here's what she looked like before. Did you see that picture again? I like that photo because you don't see her face.

[Tom Griswold]

Boy, hideous. Is she.

[Chick McGee]

She looks like Woody Harrelson.

[Christy Lee]

He's a handsome man.

[Chick McGee]

Yes, Handsome man.

[Pat Godwin]

Okay, Well, a pair of identical twins from the UK have been wearing matching outfits for the past 23 years.

[Christy Lee]

Let's celebrate. Nuts. Let's do that.

[Pat Godwin]

Rosie Coles and Kathy Hefferman, both 69 and next door neighbors, and spend every day together. Take bus rides, go for walks, grab coffee, all while wearing matching ensembles.

[Chick McGee]

Well, that's sweet.

[Pat Godwin]

Even when they go on vacation together. Josh. The sisters ensure they pack identical outfits.

[Christy Lee]

What'd you say? Identical twins. What are they?

[Pat Godwin]

Yes, they're identical. Together. The bear told Southwest, the Southwest news service, that they intend to match for the rest of their lives.

[Chick McGee]

I can never remember. Are identical the ones that look alike.

[Tom Griswold]

Very good.

[Chick McGee]

Okay. Thank you.

[Christy Lee]

I was getting confused with fraternal. Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Went on to say we have exactly the same homes with the same layout and the same gray color scheme. At the moment, she likened it to being married to someone for 70 years. Except they don't argue. The sisters often wear the same clothes while growing up. But their matching came to an end when they got married in the 1970s and no longer lived nearby.

[Christy Lee]

I bet you they argue.

[Pat Godwin]

When they both separated from their husbands in 2000, they got the opportunity to move closer to one another. They both got divorced to dress the same way again.

[Tom Griswold]

That's creepy.

[Pat Godwin]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

And if you have identical twins, don't do that to them.

[Chick McGee]

It's kind of cute when they're babies.

[Tom Griswold]

It's the wrong message.

[Chick McGee]

I really want twins. Every day I pray to the patron Saint of twins, St. Paul. Oh, the Twin City. That's kind of cute, right?

[Tom Griswold]

You may. Because they skip a generation.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, that's right.

[Tom Griswold]

My mom was from two sets of twins.

[Christy Lee]

So good luck, buddy.

[Tom Griswold]

There you go.

[Christy Lee]

That's what you need in your life.

[Pat Godwin]

Twins.

[Christy Lee]

A set of twins.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

That'll get you back to being a mature adult.

[Chick McGee]

No, not for me. Can't do it. Get twins in my family now, My little.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, that's right.

[Christy Lee]

I don't care.

[Chick McGee]

They're the rare boy, girl identical twins.

[Tom Griswold]

And they dress them the same.

[Chick McGee]

My niece's penis is really something.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, that sounds. Being told Dr. Seuss thing. My niece's penis had a Reese's Pieces.

[Christy Lee]

This sounds. She is trans. Evidently. This sounds lady.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, okay.

[Christy Lee]

Whatever the problem.

[Chick McGee]

That explains. Yes, so I'm glad to know that she's not just ugly. There's a reason for her hideousness.

[Christy Lee]

Well, I don't think. I was. Tom, I swear to you, I was trying to help.

[Tom Griswold]

Get him back to slamming that TV show the Bear. So, I'm sorry. So these. I'm trying to find a picture of these old ladies.

[Pat Godwin]

I have it. What do you want to see? Here you go.

[Tom Griswold]

These are the twins.

[Christy Lee]

Tell me they dress up like cowboy hats and guns.

[Pat Godwin]

No.

[Christy Lee]

Cowboy skirts.

[Pat Godwin]

No, they're not dressed in cowboy skirts.

[Christy Lee]

Not a couple of lunatics.

[Sam Miller]

Here they are.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, I got it. I got them.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, it's in the New York Post.

[Christy Lee]

Good Lord.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

They're the Shining.

[Pat Godwin]

They've been doing it for quite a while.

[Tom Griswold]

That is the Shining. That's very, very creepy. I bet they have a lot of cats.

[Christy Lee]

Probably you're right.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, that's the ugliest dress I'VE ever seen in my entire life.

[Chick McGee]

Anyway, those are the ugliest dresses.

[Christy Lee]

I don't know when.

[Chick McGee]

Yes. Not only, but thank God there are two of them.

[Pat Godwin]

Look at that.

[Christy Lee]

I think. I think Josh started this, but this blatant hostility toward the news subjects, I don't think we've been doing enough of it.

[Pat Godwin]

All right, tell me, is that not a hideous looking dress?

[Chick McGee]

Says, I like them a lot.

[Tom Griswold]

Doesn't that look like. Isn't that right out of the shiny.

[Chick McGee]

Like whoever's just said, yeah, that's creepy looking. But I'm sure they have some laughs. It looks like you went to a fabric store with a lot of really beautiful patterns and you go, yeah, just give me one of everything.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, it is.

[Pat Godwin]

A Scottish school district has welcomed 17 set of twins who start a primary school this year. According to the BBC, the pupils will go to schools in Inverclyde, an area that has become known locally as Twinverclyde. The area is no stranger to large groups of twins. There have been.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, because they invite them there.

[Pat Godwin]

147. There have been 147 sets of twins since 2013, an average of 13 each year. But in 2015, there were 19 sets of twins starting the new primary term in the region. What's in the water there?

[Chick McGee]

Double mint.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, they could become double. What is it? Double mint. You got the Shining. Those are the most famous dental twins.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, the double mint gum.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, okay. The double mint twins.

[Christy Lee]

Double your pleasure.

[Chick McGee]

The fat guys on those scooters in the Guinness World Book of World.

[Tom Griswold]

I think they're dead. Well, yeah, Very, very dead.

[Pat Godwin]

They were twins.

[Chick McGee]

I think so.

[Tom Griswold]

Remember? They ever see those picture of these gigantic guys in there? Buns are enveloping the mini bike.

[Dave Landau]

I'm pretty sure.

[Chick McGee]

Wasn't a mini bike.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm pretty sure.

[Chick McGee]

Lindsay love Lohan. Lindsay Lohan and her twin are probably the most famous twins.

[Tom Griswold]

Right?

[Chick McGee]

They certainly. Yeah, they were great in that movie.

[Pat Godwin]

What happened to the other one, the Parent Trap? Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

We are coming right back. Standby Comedian Nick Novicki and Sam Miller are both coming up next hour. But next on the Bob and Tom show, hostility and Tom almost died. Come on back. This is the Bob and Tom show on a Thursday morning. Hope you're having a good one. This is Christopher in the Bob and Tom Studios. A segment here about hostility and we find out that Tom almost died.

[Christy Lee]

There's Pat Godwin in the performance room.

[Chick McGee]

Hello, chick man.

[Christy Lee]

Great songs today, Pat.

[Chick McGee]

Thank you.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, boy.

[Chick McGee]

Home runs, baby.

[Pat Godwin]

Take the rest of the Day off.

[Christy Lee]

Nothing but home home runs.

[Tom Griswold]

Baby Pat, those were very nice Tuesday morning. I mean that was just a home run after home run.

[Chick McGee]

What about Monday? Man, I killed it on Monday. You guys weren't here. But I kid.

[Christy Lee]

But Tuesday there was something different about the room, wasn't there? Wasn't there?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, something was missing.

[Tom Griswold]

Unbelievably so much less hostile.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Black hole on that. I have a T. Technical question.

[Christy Lee]

That's Willie Griswold.

[Chick McGee]

Chick doesn't make the room hostile, it's you. Plus Chick makes the room hostile.

[Tom Griswold]

You guys are just a bad guy.

[Chick McGee]

Will you tell your kid to shut up? Some things are great, just not together.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, I have something sweet I want to talk about.

[Christy Lee]

We're like peanut butter and sardine.

[Pat Godwin]

Josh is here too.

[Christy Lee]

Hi Josh.

[Chick McGee]

Hey man.

[Christy Lee]

There's Josh Arnold. There's Ace Cosby on Chick. Here's Tom. Tom with something.

[Tom Griswold]

I. I got up this morning, it was gonna kind of pitch black and everything and I almost killed myself because. Maybe tomorrow because.

[Christy Lee]

You ever find this when you wake up it's really dark. Has that ever happened to you?

[Chick McGee]

Do you realize how dramatic you are?

[Tom Griswold]

It was dark.

[Chick McGee]

I almost killed myself.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, it's 2:30 in the morning or whatever. My 7 year old daughter had to some decided to sleep in the. In the. What do they call it now? The primary bedroom. In other words where I was asleep. Yeah, she has a dog bed. I'm not kidding. That she hauled down the stairs and put in the bedroom.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, okay.

[Tom Griswold]

So she's on the floor.

[Chick McGee]

Sleep.

[Tom Griswold]

It's very sweet, but you've got to remember there's a dog bed between you and the bathroom door. But I would got me thinking trip over. Yeah, but I. Like I said, I almost killed myself. The. When you were a kid, did you ever do that thing where you'd set up a camp in the living room or. It was always fun to sleep somewhere else.

[Chick McGee]

It sure was. It was awesome.

[Christy Lee]

Hang on. Timeout. Christy and I know for a fact, and maybe you've told your son this, one of your dreams come true. When you were a kid, you would set up a fort or like a bed in a cot in the living room.

[Tom Griswold]

Absolutely.

[Christy Lee]

Yes. All the time.

[Tom Griswold]

We had a canvas cot with those sticks. You put it together and it was. The canvas was so tight as you were trying to get the one thing into the notch, if you did it wrong, you'd slice your thumb off. Oh, it was the best.

[Pat Godwin]

Your mom would make you fake TV dinners. It was a life but it's fun.

[Christy Lee]

Did your dad tell you that story, Willie? What story? Your grandmother didn't want him to have food from TV dinners. But, Tom, your father wanted TV dinners, like, served, like in a TV dinner. So she bought segmented trays.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

And would cook food and put aluminum foil over here. Tommy, here's your. Here, here, baby. Here's your food.

[Chick McGee]

He told me about this story over one of our famous three minute dinners. Over the sink, eating spaghetti with me, my other brother.

[Christy Lee]

There it is.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. And again, I had an idea years ago. It's since been taken, but I wanted to start a. A special restaurant for divorced guys.

[Christy Lee]

This is a great idea.

[Tom Griswold]

Where it was, you'd stand up, it'd be just that. You walk in, there'd be this huge row of sinks. You would just stand there eating. You could have. I'm willing to sit, maybe get the sink across from me if it's not too crowded. But you didn't never camp out. You never camped out in your living room or in the backyard.

[Chick McGee]

Of course. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Take blankets and make a fort. Move furniture around.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

For the purposes of this broadcast, I didn't do that because. How shall I put this? The living room was where the fun was, so I stayed in my room. Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Could have used one of those stand up ashes trays to hold your tent.

[Christy Lee]

You know, the big event in my life as a kid, I got an $88 black and white television set. I saved up my money for my room and I put it in my room and I built out of two old end tables. I cut them in half and hooked some sort of bracket up on the wall so you could set your TV up there in that.

[Chick McGee]

That's awesome.

[Christy Lee]

And I took two radios apart and took the speakers out of them, made headphones.

[Pat Godwin]

Are you serious?

[Christy Lee]

And I would listen to the TV in my room.

[Tom Griswold]

You' MacGyver. Of a terrible, terrible childhood.

[Christy Lee]

Well, I wouldn't say terrible.

[Pat Godwin]

No?

[Christy Lee]

No, I'd say terrible. Yeah, you're right.

[Chick McGee]

Challenging, yes.

[Christy Lee]

Difficult.

[Chick McGee]

But man, that's great how you coped.

[Christy Lee]

That's exactly.

[Pat Godwin]

Back in the day when they had the DVDs, it would fold down in the back of your car, the kids would go out in the garage, and you'd turn the. The car on, just on, you know, the ACC or whatever. And they would sleep in the back of the car, in the back of the pilot and watch movies.

[Tom Griswold]

That carbon monoxide makes you really rest.

[Pat Godwin]

You know, it's not the car. You don't turn the car on. You just Turn the accessories on you.

[Tom Griswold]

Sorry. Headache. Did you make. Did you make forts when you were a kid, Josh?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Oh, yeah, man. We always did, my brother. And then we would also camp in the backyard. We would get the tent out and camp in the backyard.

[Tom Griswold]

Started to rain. Would you go inside?

[Chick McGee]

No, I don't. I think we roughed it. Yeah, I don't think. I think we were fine. No kidding. We had that extra sheet that goes over the tent or whatever and the rain flows on.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, nice. Very good.

[Christy Lee]

I remember camping out in the backyard, but it was only because of the next door neighbor who was my age. We were friends and he wanted to camp out. Yeah, I didn't ever care for that.

[Tom Griswold]

Because you were away from your TV and your house.

[Chick McGee]

I loved it because we. We didn't have somebody to tell us go to bed. Really.

[Sam Miller]

Right.

[Chick McGee]

We could stay up kind of later and. Yeah, it was fun.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, cool. Well, just a little memory about being a kid. Let's get back to the sports desk with Chick McGee.

[Christy Lee]

Well, let's see what this is. Oh, that's right.

[Tom Griswold]

Stupid world record.

[Christy Lee]

You know what? Let's put that on hold here. Let me tell you about this Netflix documentary series. Quarterbacks will be returning for a second season.

[Chick McGee]

Hell yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Their only sticking point is that the Peyton Manning and his production company, OMA Omaha, they're having trouble finding quarterbacks who want to participate in the show. So far, Justin Fields, Lamar Jackson, Jalen Hurts, Trevor Lawrence, Tua, Jimmy Garoppolo, Dak Prescott, Daniel Jones, Sam Howe, Sammy Baker Mayfield, Matthew Stafford have all told Peyton Manning. Manning. Thanks, but no thanks.

[Chick McGee]

Go crap in a hat.

[Christy Lee]

According to the Hollywood Reporter, Manning said the deadline for finding suitable subjects for the show is approaching very soon. This is Peyton's quote, quote, the deadline is approaching very soon. To use a cheesy analogy, we're definitely in the two minute drill here. Then Peyton said, I had three starting quarterbacks tell me no yesterday, so I'm swallowing my pride. Then Peyton added, I think maybe some guys are thinking that it's going to be a distraction, even though I told a couple of them, I guarantee you'll win the super bowl just like Mahomes if you do the quarterback series. Peyton, though, admitted that, yes, if you're thinking this, here's the answer to that question. Had Peyton been approached to do a show like this when he was playing, he honestly said, yeah, I probably would have turned turned it down as well. But Peyton then said, if a quarterback that I respected told me, hey, trust me, we're going to do right by you. You're not going to regret it. We're going to cut anything out you don't want. You won't even know we're there. Then I probably would have said, yeah, I might as well do.

[Tom Griswold]

And if you've seen it, the show's great.

[Christy Lee]

Kirk Cousins is America's sweetheart.

[Pat Godwin]

After the quarterback series, why don't they call it backs? And then they are. They could do cornerbacks. They could do.

[Tom Griswold]

Because if they did corner cornerbacks, no one would ever watch. The guy's parents wouldn't watch.

[Pat Godwin]

I don't know that.

[Chick McGee]

What do you mean?

[Tom Griswold]

What do you mean?

[Christy Lee]

Okay, she's not that far off. There's a good idea in there somewhere. A season in the life of a NFL player.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

And they just wouldn't have to be a quarterback.

[Tom Griswold]

That could be done.

[Pat Godwin]

Maybe shine some light on some of these other guys that don't get all the attention.

[Tom Griswold]

These are Beholder.

[Christy Lee]

Or Cameron Cheeseman, the launch snapper for the Washington Commanders. I'd like to see how Heath goes through a practice bending over there with his ass in the air, snapping the ball back to the punter.

[Tom Griswold]

Get a mild erection. When he starts rubbing you right there in the crack.

[Christy Lee]

I have some feelings. No, the snapper wouldn't be rubbing me. Never mind. Back to this. Former professional basketball players broken the Guinness World Record for the most basketball three pointers in one minute. I don't know why Steph Curry hasn't tried this, but Jason Pryor beat the previous record of 31 three pointers in one minute. He shot 33.

[Chick McGee]

Wow.

[Christy Lee]

60 seconds. So that's two more. Pryor also became the first person to be awarded the record for the most basketball three pointers in 30 seconds with a total of 18.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Christy Lee]

Prior also holds the Guinness World Record for the most basketball three pointers in one minute with a single ball with 12. All right, well, that seems to me like that would be a lot of onus, if you will, on the guy rebounding the basket.

[Chick McGee]

There's pressure there to get it. Does he have a buddy rebounding?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, he must.

[Tom Griswold]

That's my question.

[Christy Lee]

Prior also holds the Guinness World Record for the most basketball three pointers in one minute with a single ball. Did I just say this? At 12. A title he shares with Anthony Miracola.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, that's a. That's a pretty cool record, though. Be a lot tougher if he were being guarded.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, hell yeah.

[Christy Lee]

See, now I'm sitting here not. I'm trying to keep the room a little bit More positive.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Yes.

[Christy Lee]

And I'm trying. Try not to attack your dumb ass.

[Tom Griswold]

But you've ever seen this guy's. They showed his apartment. It's full of giant animals from every fair he's ever been to. He's really good, apparently. Do you think that hoop at the fair is juiced somehow?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, I think it's a double hoop. So it's like a double rim. And it's also a little bit smaller.

[Pat Godwin]

Really?

[Christy Lee]

Just a tick smaller.

[Chick McGee]

I think it's higher than 10ft. I think it might be 12 as well. I think some of them. The hoop is a little smaller than the ball.

[Tom Griswold]

Or do they. Do they have a special ball that they use? Oh, that they can use the real one?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. If the person that hands you the basketball is also holding a cigarette, you can assume it's not NBA regulation rules. And I don't blame them. From what I remember, I worked a state fair for, like, two weeks when I was working for Rawlings. And I talked to a bunch of people who did those. The games. People said they. They claimed that the prizes come out of their money. So, like, they. If every prize they have to give away, like, they have to pay for it.

[Pat Godwin]

Are you serious?

[Chick McGee]

Like, they. Yes. Who. Which monocled man is managing this fare? No kidding.

[Tom Griswold]

You.

[Chick McGee]

You don't get your money unless you earn it there, little boy. Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Then what's your incentive to get people to play your game?

[Chick McGee]

Exactly that. To get. The more people you get to play, the more money that comes. The more people lose is the idea. So the more money that comes in. When I was a little kid, I thought that I weighed a lot more than I looked like because I was kind of a chubby kid, you know? And they had the. Guess the weight game. And I was like. In front of all my friends, I was like, this is going to be hilarious. He's going to say, I'm £90. I'm really 130. This is going. I'm going to make a bunch of money. And then in front of all my friends, he just guessed my exact weight. And then I had to get on the scale in front of the whole fair to tell everybody I was a fat kid. Man, that imprints.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, it does.

[Tom Griswold]

They carry that around. Are they still doing that one or did that.

[Pat Godwin]

I doubt it.

[Chick McGee]

I've never seen one get run wrong.

[Pat Godwin]

And how do they do that?

[Chick McGee]

I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

Maybe you're standing. Maybe that could be. There's a thing on the pavement, and there's a guy in back With a radio. She's 240.

[Pat Godwin]

You know what that might be? Actually, I don't.

[Chick McGee]

I have no idea.

[Christy Lee]

Are you saying I've never actually.

[Chick McGee]

Actually done it.

[Christy Lee]

They have a scale hidden under.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Waiting area.

[Chick McGee]

Buried in the ground. You're both insane.

[Christy Lee]

Well, how does a guy traveling circus.

[Chick McGee]

Right, Right.

[Christy Lee]

You know what it takes to bury.

[Tom Griswold]

Coming up next. He's a funny guy. He's a big guy. He's comedian Sam Miller. We'll have him next here. This is the Bobbins Tom Show. Good morning. Back now with more of the Bob and Tom show here on a Thursday. This is Christopher in the Bob and Tom studios. Funny guy. He's the big one. Sam Miller on the Bob and Tom.

[Chick McGee]

Tom, we have a very special guest in the house.

[Tom Griswold]

We do. And he's going to be lucky to be getting some delicious burgers or steaks this morning. He is Sam Miller.

[Sam Miller]

Hello.

[Tom Griswold]

Look, a guy with a hearty appetite. I'm guessing.

[Sam Miller]

Hello. I. I eat a lot of food.

[Chick McGee]

Hi.

[Pat Godwin]

Sam looks all ready.

[Chick McGee]

He's got a football build, right?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm. I'm not trying to say anything disparaging. I mean, he looks like I'm huge.

[Chick McGee]

How tall are you, Sam?

[Sam Miller]

I'm 6 foot 6, 360 pounds.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Big dude.

[Chick McGee]

Big dude. That's like a defensive end at Alabama.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

It's like three of me into college.

[Sam Miller]

But.

[Tom Griswold]

I'd go, sure. It's good seeing you, Sam.

[Chick McGee]

How old are you?

[Sam Miller]

I am 40.

[Chick McGee]

40, okay. Yeah. That you just recently turned 40 or. Because it took.

[Sam Miller]

No, I turned 40 in December. They just kind of. These years have really, like, come at me fast.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know anything about. About you. I've talked to you for, like, 30 seconds. Married, single.

[Sam Miller]

I'm totally married.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, really?

[Sam Miller]

Yeah. It's intense.

[Chick McGee]

Is it?

[Sam Miller]

Yeah. Yeah. I met my wife. It's funny. I actually met my wife when I was homeless. I was four months sober and still homeless when I met her. But I didn't tell her that.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Sam Miller]

Cause that's a deal breaker.

[Tom Griswold]

So obviously your place or mine didn't come up.

[Sam Miller]

You know, she asked.

[Chick McGee]

She was like.

[Sam Miller]

She was like, can we go back to your place? And I was like, me and my roommates, we're not getting along right now. My roommates were seagulls.

[Chick McGee]

They are hard to get along. Talking, taking my food.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, technically, if you were like, in a car and she said, can we go back to your place? You said, stop the car. We're here. It's pretty much Anywhere you.

[Chick McGee]

Where were you living? Like, on. Where you.

[Sam Miller]

It's. I lived in a lot of places. I lived in abandoned houses. I lived on a porch couch for a long time.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Sam Miller]

I've lived in tents.

[Tom Griswold]

Did the people know that you were on their porch couch?

[Sam Miller]

Yeah. Yeah. My friend Mark. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

He's didn't invite you inside.

[Sam Miller]

You didn't want me inside? I wasn't really an inside kind of guy, actually. Not at night.

[Chick McGee]

Like. Like, people have outdoor cats and indoor cats. Outdoor roommate. He's an outdoor.

[Tom Griswold]

Sam, Was this in a. Was this in a temperate climate? Where were you?

[Sam Miller]

No, I was in Washington State. In the summer. It's nice, though.

[Tom Griswold]

Sure. But I mean, in the winter.

[Sam Miller]

In the winter, it got kind of hairy. But I would hide at my mom's house. My mom said I could stay at her house if I was sober.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Sam Miller]

She had good boundaries. But I wasn't gonna be sober.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Sam Miller]

So I was like, I'd rather be chilly than sober.

[Chick McGee]

But you're sober now.

[Sam Miller]

Yeah. You know what? Next? Actually, in five days, I'll have 15 years sober. Wait, June 10th. What day is it?

[Pat Godwin]

June 9th.

[Sam Miller]

Oh, it's tomorrow.

[Pat Godwin]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

I like a guy that doesn't know how old he is and doesn't know what day is.

[Chick McGee]

Well, he's in brain cells, so. Right.

[Tom Griswold]

It doesn't bring back the ones that you lost.

[Chick McGee]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, congratulations, man.

[Sam Miller]

I take recovery really seriously, and I'm grateful. A lot of my fans that I've met are sober people. The best messages I get are other people that are like, hey, I quit doing meth, and I really like your jokes, and I love that. That's cool.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

So you're married now and housed, I assume.

[Sam Miller]

Yeah, yeah, we bought. I'm a homeowner.

[Chick McGee]

Wow.

[Sam Miller]

Yeah, I was.

[Tom Griswold]

So your wife works?

[Sam Miller]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's how that's keeping the dream alive.

[Chick McGee]

Your home full now.

[Sam Miller]

Yeah. Yeah. I was actually president of my hoa.

[Chick McGee]

No way.

[Sam Miller]

I didn't like it. I thought it'd be fun, funny, because I could, like, write jokes about it, but it was. It was just really dumb.

[Chick McGee]

Tom loves HOAs.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, usually it's some retired guy that had a crappy job that never got to boss anybody around, and now he can come over and tell people who work hard and have a lot more money than he does what to do with the front lawn.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, it is. He's dead on. Did you handle money, or were you also the treasurer of the.

[Sam Miller]

No, No, I think it was mostly a serious ceremonial position.

[Chick McGee]

You're a figurehead.

[Sam Miller]

Well, it was weird because they'd be like, oh, so and so's their grass is too long. And I'm like. It was like, I just want to have, like, cars in my yard. Like, I grew up in Spanaway, Washington, and, like, you know, yard couches, tarps. But we. They were like, oh, his. His lawn. I'm like, it's fine.

[Chick McGee]

He's only got two washers out there.

[Tom Griswold]

It's no big deal. We're speaking with comedian Sam Miller. Sam Miller is out there on the road, and you can find [e-mail] some great clips of you online, some really funny stuff, but you are a very big guy. Would you say six?

[Sam Miller]

Six, six, six, 360? Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh. And sober for 15 years.

[Sam Miller]

Fifteen years.

[Tom Griswold]

Do you mind if I ask what your drink of choice was back in the day?

[Sam Miller]

Meth.

[Chick McGee]

That's a pretty good drink.

[Tom Griswold]

I didn't know that it was now available as a liquid.

[Chick McGee]

You can put it in anything.

[Sam Miller]

I started. I started with weed because I heard it was a gateway drug.

[Chick McGee]

You wanted to work your way up.

[Sam Miller]

Yeah. And it was like, you know, weed, psychedelics, alcohol, cocaine, methamphetamine. And then. Yeah, and it got really bad, but also it was really awesome sometimes. I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

But you got your head clear and you're okay now for the most part.

[Sam Miller]

I mean, being a human being is, like, hard, like. And I take recovery really seriously, and I'm. I'm lucky. I have a wonderful family, a wonderful community, and. And I get to do standup comedy for a living now. And that's.

[Chick McGee]

That's great. So you should be proud of yourself. We're proud of you, man.

[Sam Miller]

Yeah, I'm pretty proud of myself most of the time.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, you picked the right day to come because we're going to have some snacks, if you will. We got some burgers. We got some pork workshops going. We're doing a special tribute today to Omaha Steaks. We'll get to that.

[Christy Lee]

But before we.

[Pat Godwin]

Are you a father? I'm sorry?

[Sam Miller]

Yeah, I got two kids, man.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, well, see? Happy Father's Day.

[Sam Miller]

Yeah. Buddy and Oliver, they're 12 and 10. They got big heads. It's awesome.

[Tom Griswold]

Do you mean that they physically have big heads?

[Sam Miller]

Yeah, big heads.

[Tom Griswold]

Sam is a very big guy. Looks like he could be a lineman in the NFL.

[Sam Miller]

I'm huge.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, you're a big fella. Six. Six. What'd you say? 340?

[Sam Miller]

No, 360. It's actually 370, but I say 360. The treadmill. I've been doing cardio because I found out I have high cholesterol. And the treadmill, it's like, how much do you weigh before I start running? And I have to lie and say 350, because that's the max weight.

[Chick McGee]

Oh.

[Sam Miller]

Otherwise it won't start.

[Tom Griswold]

And we've learned a little bit about you. You have a couple of sons. I think you said they were 10 and 12. You are married. You are 15 years sober tomorrow, right?

[Sam Miller]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And there was. Did you get sober before you went to jail?

[Sam Miller]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Sam Miller]

No. It's usually the other way around.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm just asking.

[Sam Miller]

Yeah. No, I went to jail, and then I got sober, and actually, the last couple years, I didn't go to jail at all. Yeah. It was a wild scene. Jail sucks. They won't even let you.

[Chick McGee]

Really? Yeah.

[Sam Miller]

They won't even let you leave.

[Chick McGee]

Not even, like, on a long weekend, you can have a fun Labor Day.

[Sam Miller]

Yeah, it was. It was bad.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you have the tattoos before you went?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah.

[Sam Miller]

Yeah. People asked me this. Yeah, I've been. People ask me a lot of times, like, what it was like being what. What it was like with the meth. And I always show people. Can I show you my tattoo?

[Chick McGee]

Yes, please. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Because I see him on your arms. He's picking up your belly.

[Chick McGee]

Whoa. Okay. And it's, let's dance. Let's dance on your belly. Yeah. Are you a Bowie fan or. No, No, A meth fan. That's the tattoo you get.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you get. Did you get that. Did you get that in prison or pre.

[Sam Miller]

No, no, I got this from a guy in OMAC for a bag of dope.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm confused.

[Sam Miller]

Yeah. I. I always tell folks, like, if you want to know if you have a problem with drugs or alcohol, just read your belly tattoo.

[Chick McGee]

That should let you know.

[Sam Miller]

And I don't even like to dance.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, really?

[Sam Miller]

I was on one.

[Tom Griswold]

Was that your idea to put it there? Yeah. Did you write the words, let's dance?

[Sam Miller]

There's just. No, he wrote him. The tattoo guy.

[Tom Griswold]

But, I mean, he. Did he suggest that you get a let's Dance tattoo?

[Sam Miller]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

It was your idea. Okay.

[Sam Miller]

Yeah, I had a. You know. You get inspired.

[Chick McGee]

Sure. And by the way, I did just buy the official Sam Miller T shirt, and it says less dance right on the belly there. It's the coolest, most unique merch I've seen from a comic in years.

[Sam Miller]

I try to get my shirts. I also have these Ones that say sam Miller's seagull eggs on it. Because there is this. There's this thing that happened when I got sober. People would come up to me and be like, hey, I'm scared to ask you this, but is it true? Like, somebody told me that you were eating seagull eggs, and I had to tell people, no, that's a rumor. I was never eating seagull eggs. And if you want to. That's what it's like when you get sober after being really high for a very long time is that there was a rumor going around that I was eating seagull eggs, which really hurt.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, you had no way to fry them up anyway.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. You would have had the rock.

[Tom Griswold]

And we've established the fact that you were couch surfing for a while. Yeah, One of the couches. Outdoors on a porch.

[Sam Miller]

Yeah. People would ask me if I had a house yet, and I'd go, almost 20ft.

[Chick McGee]

You're one of those outdoor friends that we've all had.

[Sam Miller]

Yeah. Yeah. I. Yeah, it was bad. I mean, I fell out of a tree one time.

[Chick McGee]

How'd that happen?

[Tom Griswold]

Sam?

[Sam Miller]

I owed this. I was at this house party, and I was drunk, and this girl showed up and I owed her money, and I knew she couldn't get up this tree, so I climbed up this tree. I brought some beer up the tree.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Sam Miller]

And it's weird. I like this story because I woke up in the hospital because I think there's a good story about addiction and alcoholism and that those who suffer from it. Is it. I woke up in the hospital. I don't remember what happened.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Sam Miller]

And the doctor was like, sam, I think we got to talk about this. I think it's time to make a change. And I was like, you're right. I was like, I gotta stop climbing trees.

[Tom Griswold]

That's the first of 12 steps.

[Sam Miller]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Sam Miller]

I had a tree problem.

[Tom Griswold]

Guessing. I'm guessing the problem was gravity.

[Sam Miller]

Yeah. Yeah, it was bad.

[Chick McGee]

It was Tom. Have you seen one of his arm tattoos? Is a fish. What kind of fish is that?

[Sam Miller]

It's a burbit.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, a burbit.

[Sam Miller]

Yeah. And then I got a flower for.

[Tom Griswold]

Wait a minute. Wait, Hang on.

[Pat Godwin]

Slow down.

[Tom Griswold]

What's a burbit?

[Sam Miller]

It's like a freshwater ling cod.

[Chick McGee]

Now, I had heard that you were eating burbit eggs.

[Tom Griswold]

Is that true?

[Sam Miller]

I'm. I don't know.

[Pat Godwin]

That's caveat.

[Sam Miller]

I don't live in a world of absolutes.

[Tom Griswold]

Sam. Bella, Russell, I guess.

[Sam Miller]

Sam, things happen.

[Tom Griswold]

Can I see your right arm? Can you hold it? Yeah, that would be machine gun or something.

[Sam Miller]

Yeah, that would be an AK47. Because I wanted to be a tough guy. And then. And then when I got sober, one of the jobs. So I had all these different jobs after I got sober in 2008. And one of them is I was an assistant. I worked at a preschool. I was like a preschool school teacher.

[Tom Griswold]

Really?

[Christy Lee]

And.

[Sam Miller]

Yeah, an assistant preschool teacher. And I had to wear a sock on my arm to cover up the gun tattoo because it would make parents uncomfortable and children curious. Yeah. And it's the thing, like, I love my life today. I'm a really good person. And even back then when I was getting high, I was still a good person. I just didn't. I was really sick, you know.

[Pat Godwin]

You made bad choices.

[Sam Miller]

I made really bad choices. But some of that stuff too. Like, I think about it, my dad died when I was 12. Like, things went really sideways for a really long time. And that's the thing is, like, I always say I was. I'm glad that I could put this out. There is it. I didn't get high because I like being high. I got high more because I hate the way I feel when I'm sober. I wasn't running towards something. I was running away from that feeling, you know? Now you're feeling good sometimes. Yeah, yeah. I'm 51% good. Like, I, you know, being a full time standup comedian and a full time dad and a full time husband is a hard way to make a go with it in life. But things are looking up now. Look at me now. I'm on the Bob and Tom Show.

[Tom Griswold]

So you talked about meeting your wife. Kind of. So you, you. You're on your first date.

[Sam Miller]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Such as it is. And she. You couldn't do your place or mine because your place.

[Sam Miller]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Was a. The street. How did you actually physically encounter her for the first time?

[Sam Miller]

She let me come over, which was cool.

[Tom Griswold]

But I mean, did you just meet her on the street?

[Sam Miller]

No, I was bouncing at a bar and she came in and she was big and she had tattoos, and that's what I'm into. I like big women and I like big women with tattoos.

[Christy Lee]

Sure.

[Sam Miller]

Yeah. And that makes sense because big women have more room for tattoos.

[Chick McGee]

The wider canvases, more canvases. All that is.

[Sam Miller]

That's what I'm talking about.

[Pat Godwin]

Do you have a favorite one of hers?

[Sam Miller]

She has a. She has a tattoo of her breastfeeding when she got it after her son was born.

[Chick McGee]

Is it on her arm? Okay.

[Sam Miller]

Yeah, yeah. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

So it's not like a baby on her boob.

[Tom Griswold]

That'd be really hot.

[Chick McGee]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

Right now, I thought we would let Sam enjoy a little bit of news with us and perhaps comment. What have you got, Christy Lee?

[Pat Godwin]

The Supreme Court has sided with Jack Daniels and its trademark dispute with the makers of the Bad Spaniels dog toy. We have a squeaky toy which is shaped like a Jack Daniels bottle is as part of the VIP product Silly Squeakers line of chew toys. Lawyers for Jack Daniels argue the toy misleads customers profits from Jack Daniels hard earned goodwill and associates associates rather its whiskey with excrement. I don't get that jump.

[Tom Griswold]

It's because of the. Have you seen the toy? It says Jack Daniel says old number seven. The toy says old number two. I mean, it's so silly.

[Pat Godwin]

The court did not decide whether the toy makers have violated trademark laws, but instead sent the case back for further review.

[Tom Griswold]

While Jackson, this is on some technicality. So it was a unanimous decision.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, it says the old. It was.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. That's rare.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, says the old number two on your Tennessee carpet. That's where it comes in.

[Tom Griswold]

I should have a joke, for God's sake.

[Chick McGee]

Now, unless Jack Daniels, I'm assuming, doesn't have their own chew toys for dogs. If they did, there might be an issue, but otherwise they should have embraced this. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

That they could have some fun. Fun.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

The original bottle notes it's 40% alcohol by volume. The parody features a dog's face and says it's 43% poo by volume and 100% smelly. The packaging of the toy notes in small font. This product is not affiliated with Jack Daniel's distillery. The Silly Squeakers line includes Mountain Drool, which parodies Mountain Dew, and Hein Sniffin, which parodies Heineken Beer.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. At least they aren't tying up the courts with frivolous stuff. Doing the important matters at this.

[Tom Griswold]

What they should do, they should go with another. Find a bourbon company that has a sense of humor or a whiskey company like, do makers bark something, you know, finds. I would think this would be helpful to them. They should, like you say, embrace this fun, wild jerky. Yeah. Where does the dog come in? I.

[Chick McGee]

Dogs love.

[Christy Lee]

Dogs love.

[Pat Godwin]

You love jerky.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, so the wild jerky would be jerky for your dog. Very good. I didn't pick that up. I give my dog the. I give my dog those liver cubes.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I bet they love them.

[Pat Godwin]

Liver cubes.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, they're delicious. I mean, they're.

[Chick McGee]

Are you sampling the dog tricks against.

[Tom Griswold]

They're. They're dry. They're the size of dice.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, I have.

[Chick McGee]

These are booyan cubes. You aren't supposed to put them in your water bowl.

[Tom Griswold]

You can keep them in your water bottle. Pop.

[Pat Godwin]

And they're freeze dried. Are they freeze dried? They're real light.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, they're great.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

But yeah. This. They apparently have no sense of humor. I don't get it.

[Sam Miller]

I give my dogs pieces of fried. Be not fried. Dried beef lung. And it's terrifying.

[Chick McGee]

They love that too. Yes.

[Sam Miller]

They go nuts for it.

[Pat Godwin]

Ready to get dried beef lung.

[Chick McGee]

I used to order it.

[Pat Godwin]

Really?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. For what?

[Sam Miller]

For dogs.

[Chick McGee]

When I had a dog for a little bit and I. I would. Yeah. She loved it.

[Sam Miller]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

So you'd go to the grocery store on the butcher and ask him to give you some. No.

[Chick McGee]

If I remember, I. Oh, you know what I did?

[Tom Griswold]

I did.

[Chick McGee]

I bought it at a. Like one of those. It wasn't whole Foods, but it was a type of grocery store like that. And they had their own. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Huh.

[Chick McGee]

But I also had ordered something whole.

[Tom Griswold]

Food, so it cost 400.

[Chick McGee]

It was not cheap, but it was definitely beef long. They went crazy.

[Pat Godwin]

I never heard.

[Chick McGee]

Or she did, rather.

[Pat Godwin]

Sorry.

[Tom Griswold]

I'll have to try this Dried beef.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Yeah. I'll tell you what grocery store it is.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you blacken it just for.

[Chick McGee]

I did. Yep. Yep. She liked the Cajun style.

[Sam Miller]

Some of those dog treats do look really good. Sometimes I'm just like, there's no way.

[Chick McGee]

Have you ever eaten dog food?

[Sam Miller]

No. I knew a guy who would do that.

[Chick McGee]

I. I ate Alpo one time drunk. It was out of the can. It's actually. It's got gravy. There's no way.

[Tom Griswold]

Way.

[Chick McGee]

It's good, though. It's. It's not bad.

[Tom Griswold]

No.

[Chick McGee]

I mean, it's not anything I ever did again. But it's. I mean, it's chunks of meat and gravy.

[Pat Godwin]

You know what kind of meat it was.

[Chick McGee]

It's bad, dude.

[Pat Godwin]

It's not.

[Chick McGee]

I think it's just Salisbury steak that they couldn't sell in the country.

[Pat Godwin]

We'll talk about that often.

[Chick McGee]

Racehorse ass or something.

[Sam Miller]

You shouldn't eat it out of a can. That's classless. Put it on a plate.

[Christy Lee]

What?

[Tom Griswold]

Christie is implying that you were eating sea biscuits and gravy. We're coming right back with more comedians. Comedian Nick Novicki is coming up in just a couple of seconds. You don't want to miss that. This is the Bob and Tom Show. We're Back now with more of the Bob and Tom show here for a Thursday morning. This is Christopher in the Bob and Tom Studios. Let's do a segment here with comedian Nick Novicki.

[Christy Lee]

There's Willie Griswold.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, man.

[Christy Lee]

Ace Cosby's here. I'm Chick McGee. And here is Tom Griswold with a. Our special guest.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much. We are joined by comedian Nick Novicki. Hey, Nick, how are you?

[Nick Novicki]

Hey.

[Christy Lee]

Good, good.

[Nick Novicki]

Thanks for having me back on.

[Tom Griswold]

Good to see you. It's good to see you. And people may have seen you with Nate Bargettsi recently. And coming up, you're gonna be in Vegas with him.

[Nick Novicki]

Yeah, gonna be in Vegas. I'll be in Atlanta, Tampa, you know, been touring all over the country with him, so it's been pretty incredible.

[Tom Griswold]

He's got a great new special out there.

[Nick Novicki]

That's right.

[Tom Griswold]

That they're. They're pushing. If you get a chance, be sure to watch Nate and I have not seen the special.

[Chick McGee]

Do you.

[Tom Griswold]

Do you get even, like a little, little, little anything in there?

[Nick Novicki]

I do. I give him. I gave a little. Little fist bump on the way in to him. I opened for him in that special. So it's pretty crazy. And I'll be honest, like, performing in some of these crowds has been really nuts. I performed in front of 5,000 people in Hershey, and I'll be honest, I was nervous. Not about performing in front of all those people. I was nervous about performing in a city who identifies as a chocolate factory. I was just walking around.

[Christy Lee]

They might not ever see him again.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, we should.

[Christy Lee]

We should point out you put him to work.

[Tom Griswold]

You are a man small of stature.

[Nick Novicki]

I'm a little person. You know, when you're in Hershey, you got to make sure, you know, I may.

[Tom Griswold]

I said I'm a comedian when I first. When I first met you. There's no way this is going to come off. Not the wrong way. So I will say in advance, I think you're hilarious. And I really enjoyed meeting you. That's why we. We wanted you back. And I mentioned this the first time I saw you, but don't take. You look like a miniature John Lennon.

[Nick Novicki]

I'll take it. I mean, hey, I'll take his birthdays today.

[Tom Griswold]

John Lennon, I mean, very handsome, nice hair. You could do a nice beetle haircut if you wanted to. But you're a small guy. How tall are you?

[Nick Novicki]

So I'm three foot ten.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow. Three foot ten. Dude walking around. Hershey Penns. I have never been there, but I Understand? You can speak, smell the chocolate.

[Nick Novicki]

You can.

[Christy Lee]

It's.

[Nick Novicki]

I'll tell you what, Hershey is amazing, but definitely, you could smell the chocolate, and you wake up thinking, man, I. I think I want some chocolate.

[Pat Godwin]

You know, they have Hershey Kiss street lights.

[Nick Novicki]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah. My grandpa used to work for them. Pop Pop Charlie. He did, huh?

[Tom Griswold]

What did he do for him?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah, Pop Pop Charlie. I slept in the bed with your other three grandparents, right?

[Pat Godwin]

What?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It was.

[Chick McGee]

Pop Pop Charlie. Finally got Poppy.

[Christy Lee]

And then you went out and got a golden ticket.

[Pat Godwin]

He was in maintenance, but he worked.

[Tom Griswold]

It's interesting to me that in some ways, his pockets full of chocolate.

[Pat Godwin]

He worked on the machines that make the chocolate.

[Tom Griswold]

Remember, like those early Bruce Springsteen songs? All the guys had nicknames. That's how you're. You have. You have Grandma Vo.

[Pat Godwin]

Right? Pop Pop Charlie.

[Tom Griswold]

Pop Pop Charlie, yeah. This is interesting.

[Christy Lee]

Drunken Billy, don't forget.

[Tom Griswold]

Does everybody have uncles and aunts that have weird names?

[Pat Godwin]

I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

What did you call your grandparents?

[Pat Godwin]

Well, I called one Grandma Grandma Vio behind her back. And the other one was Grandma Ruth.

[Tom Griswold]

Right.

[Pat Godwin]

And then Pop Pop Charlie and Grandpa.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. All right. Okay. No weird names.

[Pat Godwin]

Nope.

[Tom Griswold]

Chick. Did you ever meet your grandparents?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, you know the story. My dad, Dad's mom. I never called her grandma. Her name was Helena, so I always called her Lena when I was a kid, until she passed away.

[Pat Godwin]

Lena.

[Christy Lee]

Lena.

[Tom Griswold]

Sweet.

[Chick McGee]

Did you know she was your grandma, or was she just another lady in the room?

[Christy Lee]

Where did you think I grew up? I was asking a question. Yes, I knew she was my. I knew she was my grandma.

[Chick McGee]

It's funny if you're 12 years old and you're like, yeah, Lena's coming over. She's like, I haven't seen my mom in a while. You're like, wait a second. Wait a minute.

[Christy Lee]

Told me it was my sister.

[Chick McGee]

I thought you fun, like Jack Nicholson story.

[Tom Griswold]

Nick Novicki. Did you ever meet your grandparents?

[Nick Novicki]

Oh, yeah. Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Let me point out, I. Tom never did.

[Tom Griswold]

Never did. I did meet. One of my grandfathers was alive, but he was. I remember going over, embarrassed about being. I remember going over there and the house smelled like death. And oh, God, it was awful.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, my God.

[Chick McGee]

Well, at least it didn't imprint on you at all.

[Christy Lee]

How's it going? I'd be here more, but it smells like death.

[Chick McGee]

Be like fish and cigars. It's like death.

[Pat Godwin]

What was his name?

[Sam Miller]

The Grim Reaper.

[Tom Griswold]

The only one I met. His name was John Kenny.

[Pat Godwin]

John Kenny.

[Tom Griswold]

And I didn't really meet. He. He was scary and old and half dead and smelled bad.

[Nick Novicki]

And I remember rock star name too. John Kenny. You know.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, did you meet your grandparents?

[Nick Novicki]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Now let me ask you this again. I'm trying to be nice. You are a man, small of stature. Were your grandparents also little people?

[Nick Novicki]

No, I'm the only little person in my lineage. You know, so. Interesting thing though is our daughter. I have a two year old. We don't know if she's going to be little or tall.

[Tom Griswold]

I bet she's little now, huh?

[Nick Novicki]

She's actually 35.

[Pat Godwin]

She and your wife share clothes.

[Nick Novicki]

Yeah, exactly, exactly.

[Christy Lee]

But Tom, please keep guessing about what's going on.

[Pat Godwin]

But you're married to a little person.

[Nick Novicki]

I am married to a little person.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, Nick, real quick, just. I am sorry about anything that my dad says this morning. I am terribly, terribly sorry.

[Nick Novicki]

No, we're good. Come on. I love.

[Tom Griswold]

It's interesting to me now is again, all these questions. I'm sorry in advance. Is there a test you can take, A genetic test or something? Or are you just gonna wait and see if she gets taller than you?

[Nick Novicki]

Well, look, I got a certain amount of jokes for her being little and a certain amount for her being tall, so I'm kind of hedging my bets in between. But the crazy thing is my endorphism doesn't show up until you're three. So we are in this place where we don't know if she's little or tall.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh.

[Nick Novicki]

So my favorite thing to do is late at night, I like just sneaking in the room and looking at her while she's sleeping, all angelic. And I just go up to her and I just say, what are you? And I just walk away. I mean, look, going to love her either way.

[Tom Griswold]

But it's.

[Nick Novicki]

It's an interesting thing we don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, I. I know that you used to live in Nashville. Now you live in Los Angeles. And assuming that the. I know the writer strike is over with, the acting thing is still a mess. But when it comes back, I know you're a young actor. Do you. I mean, this. Again, this sounds dumb, but I. Presumably when you go to auditions, this would be true of anyone, whatever stripe they may be. You look around the room and there are, in your case, 50 guys that look similar to you, presumably.

[Nick Novicki]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

So do you get to know them kind of.

[Nick Novicki]

Oh, yeah, Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

A little club.

[Nick Novicki]

Yeah, it's. You know, that's the beautiful thing about it. I know you know so many little people that have Been working forever, you know, and we have our own little group of guys, we hang out and we're like, ah, man, Steve's coming in. He's gonna book this in the waiting room.

[Tom Griswold]

Are there any inside jokes that only another little person would get that are like kind of insulting? If I said it, it would be awful.

[Nick Novicki]

Not really. I mean, we're just, it's just like, you know, it's a camaraderie for it though. It is like some of these guys have been working for so many years and, you know, I mean, things are changing now. Peter Dinklage, I mean, blew it up sure. With Game of Thrones. So, you know, it's kind of just such a crazy time. I mean, I've been acting and doing stand up for 20 years. So to see now, I mean, even to see me, I've been in 50 TV shows and movies. So when I started out, you know, the. You were basically going to work in specific roles, you know, every Christmas time, hey, let's get commercials coming. You know, and times have changed, you know, but a gig is a gig.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, it's great to, hey, if you wanted me to be the elf, where is the money's green, I have.

[Nick Novicki]

A pension, you know.

[Tom Griswold]

What are some of the movies people might have seen that you're in?

[Nick Novicki]

So I've been in recently Spider man across the Spider Verse, the new Spider man movie, the animated movie.

[Tom Griswold]

And you are in what capacity?

[Nick Novicki]

So I play Lego Spider Man. So they go into the LEGO world and I'm Lego Spider Man. And it's. I'll be honest, it's really crazy too because there's so many people that are fans of that movie. People come up and they want photos all the time. And I was taking a photo with this one guy and he's like, hey, can we take another? I go, sure. He goes, can you get on my shoulders for this photo? I go, no. He goes, why? I go, well, a couple reasons. First of all, I'm 40, so that's the biggest reason. Second of all, I'm Sag Aftra and there's a strike, so I can't do stunt work.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Wow, that's so. That is so funny. Or speaking with Nick Novicki. He is a stand up committee. You've been working a lot with Nate Bargetzi. That's going well?

[Nick Novicki]

Yeah, it's awesome. And it's been amazing to see him blow up. And we've been friends forever and so getting to tour around the country with him has really been incredible.

[Tom Griswold]

This is Again, and I'm not trying to be. I just imagine in your early days of standup, I'm sort of seeing this happening because the folks in here that all do stand up, know how it goes, or they get your name wrong or whatever. I'm just seeing you getting introduced and you walk out and the mic is 5ft off the ground and they haven't had the courtesy to lower it for you.

[Nick Novicki]

You know, I mean, that's the beauty of comedy. You could always do that joke if that happens. That's real life. That's authentic. I'm like, hey, who planned? That's actually how I got into comedy. I would raise money for little people of America, and I would always open with a joke. There'd be a podium with no stool. I'm like, who's playing in this thing? I'm eight years old. You know, I'm two foot six. You know, have we done any thinking about this? You know, and so I'd be the guy behind the podium. I'm like, I'll just give the speech to myself.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, when you go, for example, I love grocery shopping.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, of course you do.

[Tom Griswold]

And I recently had occasion to help a lady get something that was a. The top shelf. I mean, not again, not to be difficult. Do you have like, set of stilts or do you have to ask people?

[Chick McGee]

Come on.

[Nick Novicki]

I wish, man. My stunt days are done. So, no, I'm just good at asking people.

[Pat Godwin]

I'm a shelf climber, baby. I'll climb a shelf.

[Tom Griswold]

We are coming back in just a couple of minutes with rejected license plates and stripper names next hour. But next, comedians Dave landau and Matt McLowery come on back. More of the Bob and Tom show now on a Thursday. Welcome back. This is Christopher in the Bob and Tom studios. The gang is back in here live on Monday morning with the first live show of 2025. We have comedians Dave Landau and Matt McClory in this segment. Let's check it out.

[Christy Lee]

I'm Chick Magee and here's Tom with two very special guests.

[Tom Griswold]

Comedian Dave Landau has joined us. You've brought your best friend along, I understand. He is Matt McLaury. I have not met Matt prior to this. Matt, how are you, sir?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I'm great. Thank you for having me.

[Tom Griswold]

You're very welcome. Now, I'd like to. I'd like to clarify because there. There seems to be a certain awkwardness in the air. Yeah, I think I can. I think I can facilitate getting you less illustration. At ease if you will.

[Chick McGee]

Okay. I don't think I'm the one who needs to be put at ease. I think that's everybody else.

[Tom Griswold]

That's precisely what I want to do. You are a. Let's see, what's the word I'm looking for? A. Not victim. That would be too awful. Victim.

[Chick McGee]

No, no, that's. Let's not do that.

[Tom Griswold]

That could potentially be.

[Chick McGee]

That could be everyone else in the room.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

What the hell are you talking about?

[Tom Griswold]

You have Asperger's. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

I mean, I feel like I'm like.

[Tom Griswold]

Mr. Bean if he might have a gun on him.

[Chick McGee]

Level into. The thing is, it's not actually called Asperger's anymore in the DSM 5. It's just high functioning autism. Ah. Like, I put a joke about it online and somebody replied to me. They said, you can't use that word anymore. It's politically incorrect. It's a slur. So I replied, shut up, Asperger's. If it's a slur, I have it.

[Tom Griswold]

That makes it my word. Yeah. I'm gonna keep saying Asperger and I'm.

[Chick McGee]

Gonna put the hard R at the.

[Tom Griswold]

End of it, too. So I'm a house Asperger. What is the phrase on the spectrum?

[Pat Godwin]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. Okay, well, let's. You know.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, I never liked that one.

[Tom Griswold]

It sounds like a roller coaster. Yeah. Yeah. Here at Cedar Point, you. Hey, you ride the Spectrum. It was awesome.

[Pat Godwin]

I think of rainbow.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Well, you're. That's a different thing.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. You guys are buddies though, right? You and Dave?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

We met 20 years ago.

[Chick McGee]

Literally 20 years ago when he got.

[Tom Griswold]

In my car and kept reading signs. Did. Had you been identified at that time? Time. As. Did they label your particular sphere of existence?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, I was. I was.

[Christy Lee]

You know what? He's right. You're the one who's weird. What's going on over there?

[Tom Griswold]

It's so difficult.

[Christy Lee]

Will you not do this in front of company?

[Chick McGee]

Please say you had been properly diagnosed and when I was 17. Until then, it was just my fault.

[Tom Griswold]

You know.

[Chick McGee]

I'm from that generation.

[Tom Griswold]

Generation. Okay. You know what I'm saying? It's just awkward.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And we live in a world. You never know what you can. I just learned what was two or three months ago. I didn't know. Maybe you know this Dave. You ever heard. You're you. Someone goes, hey, that. That. That was really expensive. That thing was really a gyp.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

First of all, I thought it was jip. Then I found that it was gyp. And then I found out that. That stood for gypsy, which is politically incorrect, which I was not exactly aware of. But I never knew that saying something was a gyp. Was a slur on an Eastern European people.

[Chick McGee]

But only to those filthy nomads. It's nothing.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I didn't know my name.

[Chick McGee]

My neighbor has made a fortune in turquoise jewelry.

[Tom Griswold]

Was real offended.

[Christy Lee]

I thought. I thought Gypsy was some made up Hollywood. Hollywood word that they used for homeless people in the movies.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, right.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

What are we supposed to call those people now then?

[Tom Griswold]

Travelers. And then there's another travelers.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, there's another one that's acceptable.

[Christy Lee]

Gosh. On 10 minutes of Nomad Land, how wonderful and beautiful it was.

[Chick McGee]

Nomad Land is poetry in motion.

[Pat Godwin]

Gypsies.

[Christy Lee]

It's Francis McDormand crapping in a bucket.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, that's all.

[Tom Griswold]

You remember my favorite review of that movie?

[Christy Lee]

Because I cried when she did that.

[Tom Griswold]

My favorite review of that movie called it poverty Porn.

[Chick McGee]

Well, that. That critic was also a. I love that.

[Tom Griswold]

Wait a minute.

[Christy Lee]

Wait a minute. A.

[Chick McGee]

It wasn't about being poor. It was. It was a chosen lifestyle.

[Tom Griswold]

It was about being boring.

[Chick McGee]

Matt actually hit one with a car.

[Tom Griswold]

And she said asperger's.

[Chick McGee]

That's a thinner joke.

[Tom Griswold]

So now. So, Matt, if I were. If. If I were to be introducing you to someone, you wouldn't bring it up? No, I wouldn't say the. Don't. Don't be concerned about the blank stare and the weird attitude. Attitude. And I would just say, hey, you figured out yourself. You're on your own. I can't figure.

[Christy Lee]

This is. This is the. The perfect storm.

[Tom Griswold]

Look, I know this guy seems like a total weirdo, but he's on the spectrum.

[Chick McGee]

This guy seems like he's right. You wouldn't say any of that in polite society.

[Christy Lee]

He's like all of us. He's doing the best that he can.

[Chick McGee]

I'm a performer. I might be turning it up a little. There's a human being under there, and you're human here. I blame Lando. You knew all this would happen. You're smiling over there, dad. Look at him.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, let's.

[Chick McGee]

He's my favorite person. I have no doubt.

[Tom Griswold]

Let's. Let's enter the realm of normality. You are a dad, Mr. Landow, is that correct?

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

You have a son. I remember. You said that one, right? Oh, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

He's eight years old.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, nice. Good age.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, it's the best. It's the best. I have a daughter, too. Yeah, and he just. He just had a daughter and I'm.

[Tom Griswold]

The godfather to his. Oh, wow.

[Chick McGee]

Which is amazing. And being a dad's amazing to me. I mean, being. Being an uncle is amazing to me. I just. I'm. I'm the kind of guy I don't like. I don't like people showing me pictures besides you. I love seeing pictures of your kid.

[Tom Griswold]

Most people, it's awful. It's like, look at my kid picture. My kid. See my kid.

[Chick McGee]

Look at my kid picture.

[Tom Griswold]

I said, relax, it's been two years. You're not gonna.

[Chick McGee]

But with your daughter, I mean, I'd love actually say. Because it's. It's my. It's a.

[Tom Griswold]

You're the first person who's trusted me to be a godfather, which I love.

[Chick McGee]

Well, I mean, you live several states away, so it's not like I have to ask you to watch her. It's a pretty easy assignment.

[Tom Griswold]

How old is she?

[Chick McGee]

She's a year and two months today. Oh, that's great, man.

[Tom Griswold]

That's sweet. Sweet.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And now your. Your eight year old son. Do you mind if I ask what his name is?

[Chick McGee]

Wyatt.

[Tom Griswold]

Wyatt.

[Chick McGee]

Right after Kurt Russell and Tombstone.

[Tom Griswold]

No joke.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, okay. Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Wyatt Earp.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, Wyatt Earp.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

But specifically Kurt Russell playing Wyatt. Right, right. Remember that Costner B.S. yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, that's a great name, Wyatt. Yeah. Let me think. He's third grade. Yes. And what is he up to? Does he have any unusual hobbies or. He.

[Chick McGee]

He's great at football, Fantastic at football. He plays in two baseball leagues, both travel.

[Tom Griswold]

So he's inherited.

[Chick McGee]

I think he's my son.

[Tom Griswold]

He's inherited none of that from me.

[Chick McGee]

He. And I'm not somebody who lives vicariously. I let him pick all his own stuff.

[Tom Griswold]

And he's a great drummer too. Oh, cool.

[Christy Lee]

You know, Dave, that Kurt Russell's son is named Wyatt as well.

[Chick McGee]

Really? I literally just found that out.

[Christy Lee]

And he's also. Also an actor. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Wyatt Russell.

[Tom Griswold]

I will not have my son be an actor because Amanda Bynes.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Oh, I see. I just feel like cautionary tale. Honestly, I just feel that adults should play kids in movies now.

[Tom Griswold]

It's enough. I mean, typically they do. I. I was, I was reading somewhere the average age of the. The. The cast of what's the most famous high school movie?

[Pat Godwin]

High School Musical.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I'm thinking of Greece.

[Pat Godwin]

Greece?

[Tom Griswold]

Yo in Greece. Yeah. What, what, what's her name? Stalker Channing. Looks like she's 50 or 50.

[Christy Lee]

Grease is a perfect movie. You watch your mouth, mister.

[Chick McGee]

I think you have it confused with Grease too.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah. That's right.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Kind of like the Godfather.

[Christy Lee]

He's right.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Up a notch. And who. Who would have thought? Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Or Dumb and Dumber, too.

[Tom Griswold]

I was joking, guys. I'm sorry.

[Chick McGee]

I had a mouthful of coffee, but I would have been laughing out loud.

[Tom Griswold]

Not good, is it?

[Chick McGee]

Now?

[Tom Griswold]

Sadly, same cast.

[Chick McGee]

Terrific. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You think it.

[Tom Griswold]

Really?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, they got it. Yeah, they made some mistakes.

[Christy Lee]

They got it wrong.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Who would have guessed?

[Tom Griswold]

Wow. Okay, well, we're hanging out with the fellas. Patty G. We'll have to get one more song out of you at some point.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, but we have a special guest.

[Christy Lee]

There's something happening.

[Chick McGee]

Something very special.

[Tom Griswold]

There we go. Ladies and gentlemen, the weird beard has arrived.

[Christy Lee]

The hair has grown since the last time I saw him in the hallway.

[Tom Griswold]

Are you. Are you. Are you dying that hair black on top?

[Chick McGee]

It's Father Manson. God bless you, my child. Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

You see, you could not pull off the priest thing like that.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, I know.

[Chick McGee]

I just like it. I look very much like Jesus.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, that's Jeff Oskay. Show these guys how it's done.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, everybody, I'm Jeff Oskay. Dave, Matt, you guys don't know this. We give you a lot of the news each week. We don't give you all the news. So I'm here to give you the news that we failed to mention.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, here's Jeff Oskay with what you failed to mention. News.

[Chick McGee]

Pew, pew. Pew, pew, pew. Oh, before we get started, I have a new sponsor at the news desk today. The news desk is sponsored by Penny Loafers. Oh, penny Loafers. It's the only shoe that makes sense. Sure. A barber was arrested for selling drugs out of his barber shop. What you failed to mention. Officers became suspicious after his haircut ran him $287.

[Tom Griswold]

It's actually pretty close.

[Chick McGee]

A prisoner escaped while having surgery on his injured penis, according to the Bangkok Post. Well, you failed to mention. He should probably stay away from that post.

[Tom Griswold]

Bangkok.

[Chick McGee]

You see, cruise ships. I don't know if you guys saw this, Dave and Matt, but cruise ships are now kicking passengers off who bring or use marijuana on the ship. What you failed to mention. And that's why I stick to cocaine, haven't been kicked off one ship. In the future, porn watchers in the UK may have to have their faces scanned to view pornography online. Well, you failed to mention. Is it their regular faces or their. Oh, faces. There's a new dive bar, Christmas Tree that smells like a dive bar. What you failed to mention. And looks great till you turn the lights on.

[Christy Lee]

Holy hell. You did that right once, Tom. Didn't you take a rabbit home and broke up with a dog or something? Oh, that's a Halloween.

[Tom Griswold]

That was a Halloween party.

[Christy Lee]

You're right.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Petoskey, Michigan was the place.

[Christy Lee]

You're right.

[Tom Griswold]

I was in costume. I took a mouse home and woke up with the dog.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yikes.

[Chick McGee]

A drunk Florida man was arrested for molesting a manatee mannequin that stood in front of Rick's reef restaurant in St. Pete's Beach. Well, you failed to mention. Well, that explains why Frisch's big boy has a restraining order against him as well.

[Tom Griswold]

Molesting a big statue.

[Christy Lee]

Wasn't the manatee wearing a T shirt?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Did someone say tacos or eat more tacos?

[Chick McGee]

It's a great one. He was very molestable. Yes. Pole dancing improves women's mental well being.

[Sam Miller]

What?

[Chick McGee]

You failed to mention. Well, until she bent runs the pole. Yeah, that's got to be. Yeah. Class is over again today, ladies. Trisha's fat ass bit the pole again. Trisha. Trisha. We learned that over, over time, human males no longer have an actual bone in their penises. Well, you failed to mention evolution does crazy stuff. Along with the lack of the bone in the penis, our most recent generation of kids were also born with no backbone. Just getting a little edgy. Snowflakes. Spineless. And finally, we learned human birth control pills work on female gorillas.

[Tom Griswold]

What?

[Chick McGee]

You failed to mention. They decided to go with that after the seventh scientist lost his arm trying to get a condom on the gorilla. I'm Dev Ask. This has been the what failed to mention news. Jeff Oskin.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you, Jeffrey. We are coming back in just a couple of seconds here. Don't go away. Stripper names are on the way. Plus, Pat's dad is discussed here on the Bob and Tom Show.

[Chick McGee]

Bob and Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

We've got you on the Bob and Tom Show. The best of the Bob and Tom show here on a Thursday. And this is Christopher and the Bob and Tom studio. Studios. Let's. Let's find out some stripper names, shall we? And Pat talks about his dad at the news desk.

[Christy Lee]

It's Jess Hooker.

[Chick McGee]

Hello.

[Christy Lee]

There's Pat Godwin.

[Chick McGee]

Hi.

[Christy Lee]

There's Josh Arnold.

[Tom Griswold]

Chick.

[Chick McGee]

How are you, man?

[Christy Lee]

I am well.

[Chick McGee]

Good.

[Christy Lee]

There's Ace Cosby. I am Chick McGee. And here's. Here's our friend. It's Tom Griswold. Hello, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey. Hi.

[Christy Lee]

How you doing?

[Tom Griswold]

Good seeing you. All right, we have a lot to get to today, so let's not dilly or dally. What have you got over there?

[Christy Lee]

Dear Bob and Tom Chick, you said yesterday you wished Bend, Oregon would just stop messing around and change their name to Ben Dover. Yes, it was from Brian. I did a little research, and near Richmond, Virginia, there is a historical district called Ben Dover. Unfortunately, Brian says when you Google something like that. Oh, you also learn Ben Dover is a British porn star.

[Pat Godwin]

There you go.

[Christy Lee]

And by the way, going by first pet and street I grew up on, for my porn name, I would be Whiskers Brunel.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, that's good.

[Chick McGee]

That's pretty good. Very good.

[Christy Lee]

Thank you.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, is that for your poor neighbor or your stripper name?

[Christy Lee]

That's the porn name.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Your porn name is what again? The street. You. What is it?

[Christy Lee]

The street you grew. My first pet. That's the first name.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Christy Lee]

And the street you grew up on.

[Tom Griswold]

So I'd be Duffy Duffield.

[Christy Lee]

Duffy Duffield.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

What would you be?

[Chick McGee]

Josh Spats. Trails.

[Christy Lee]

That's all right.

[Pat Godwin]

Seems like a specific genre there.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah. Outdoor. Outdoor foot fetishist.

[Christy Lee]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

What would you be? Jess Hooker.

[Chick McGee]

Mine would be the worst one. It does not work at all. It would be Doji.

[Pat Godwin]

Southway. We had a dog named Dog when we were kids.

[Tom Griswold]

Dog.

[Pat Godwin]

Dog.

[Tom Griswold]

D O G. God, it's cute.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, it's really cute. It's cute as the day is long.

[Chick McGee]

A Chinese Shar Pei.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, one of those things.

[Christy Lee]

And you thought it was a vaguely Asian dog?

[Chick McGee]

Sure.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, that's. I see.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I don't think my mother was that clever. I just think she liked the name Doji.

[Tom Griswold]

Sounds kind of Japanese, actually.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, that's.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Yeah, that's good. Or. Or something scientific or. Or computer wise.

[Chick McGee]

That's possible.

[Tom Griswold]

I got. I got the Doji 6000 on my iPhone 15.

[Chick McGee]

Sure.

[Tom Griswold]

Are you kidding me? I'm still dealing with a 4000 Ace.

[Chick McGee]

Is it pet name? First of street?

[Christy Lee]

Pet name.

[Tom Griswold]

Pet name.

[Chick McGee]

Missy. 62nd.

[Tom Griswold]

Missy 62nd.

[Chick McGee]

So was it a street? Street?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, the one right. The one right here.

[Pat Godwin]

There you go.

[Christy Lee]

Missing.

[Tom Griswold]

There's another 60 second. No.

[Christy Lee]

In California.

[Chick McGee]

What do you mean, lots of seconds?

[Christy Lee]

They number the streets everywhere. What are you talking about, you lunatic?

[Chick McGee]

So if somebody says, yeah, I live off 42nd Broadway. You're on the. Wow. You live in New York.

[Christy Lee]

Fifth and 40 seconds. That's a hell of a. I was.

[Tom Griswold]

Gonna say, if it's the 62nd street right over here, you can't get. Get there. They've had it blocked for a year. Tr to Close every business.

[Christy Lee]

You know what you just proven? You are living right here in your.

[Tom Griswold]

Head, here and now. That's the way to go.

[Christy Lee]

You don't have anything else?

[Tom Griswold]

I'm in the moment. In California.

[Christy Lee]

It all relates to you.

[Chick McGee]

You were born in California. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

I didn't know that. Remember the hospital?

[Tom Griswold]

What?

[Nick Novicki]

The hospital.

[Chick McGee]

Cedar.

[Christy Lee]

Cedar. Made out of cedar. Huh. That's weird.

[Chick McGee]

Smells good.

[Christy Lee]

A blanket. Lincoln was born in a cedar.

[Tom Griswold]

Cedar. Cyanide.

[Chick McGee]

Cyanide. I've been there.

[Christy Lee]

Poisonous.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Okay, I'm sorry. Back to sports.

[Christy Lee]

Boots. Thanks for asking.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, it wasn't.

[Chick McGee]

I have one, too. Thanks for.

[Tom Griswold]

Was your dog or cat named Boots?

[Christy Lee]

That's my cat named Boost. My mother liked cats.

[Tom Griswold]

What's the street?

[Christy Lee]

Oak.

[Chick McGee]

Boots.

[Christy Lee]

Boots.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, that doesn't work.

[Christy Lee]

That doesn't work, Pat.

[Chick McGee]

Puccini. Oak. My dad loved the opera Puccini. He named a pet Puccini. Our first pet.

[Tom Griswold]

What was it, a dog or a cat?

[Chick McGee]

It was a German shepherd, believe it or not.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, nice. A German shepherd named Puccini. That's odd. Wouldn't he go with a German opera? Wouldn't you think? A lot of great German operas out there.

[Chick McGee]

That's my dad. He's a waka.

[Tom Griswold]

My dog. Cosi Fan Toot. I don't know. I'm just saying. A little pretentious.

[Christy Lee]

I almost want to get another dog to name it. What is it? Cosi. Fantastic Toot.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, it's a bro. Whatever.

[Christy Lee]

Hey, what was I going to ask you, Pat? I better not.

[Chick McGee]

You can ask me anything.

[Christy Lee]

No, no, never mind.

[Chick McGee]

Do you think there are snobs out there that do that? The. The. The porno. The adult film name is your. The name of your first horse and your f. And the opera your parents first took you to?

[Christy Lee]

No, no, your. Your f. Your first horse and the name of the street of the first. First home you owned in Florida. Go ahead, take your time. I know there have been many. It's the first house.

[Tom Griswold]

Sanibel Salt Lick.

[Chick McGee]

Well, if it was opera, of course it would be.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Long mane, Deflator Mouse. Name of my porno name.

[Tom Griswold]

That's a great porno name.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Deflator Mouse.

[Christy Lee]

Amadeus. Boynton beach would be.

[Tom Griswold]

Not the town.

[Chick McGee]

Not the town Town.

[Tom Griswold]

The street.

[Chick McGee]

No, but I like.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yes, yes. No, if Pooch is. Puccini is a great name for a dog. You call him Poochie.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Poochie is short.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, my dad would do that occasionally.

[Tom Griswold]

Was Poochie a boy dog or a girl? It was a boy dog, believe it or not.

[Christy Lee]

And your. Your father was in the theater? Very active in the theater.

[Chick McGee]

Surprised? He liked Poochie. Oh, that sweet, sweet Poochie's.

[Christy Lee]

I like that.

[Tom Griswold]

You know my favorite story about your dad, though, he was never suspected.

[Christy Lee]

Never mind, go ahead.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, your. Your dad was a very fine theatrical director.

[Chick McGee]

Duck. Like Richard Burton all the time. Where have you been, boy?

[Christy Lee]

How many scarves did he own?

[Chick McGee]

At least one. I know, like a purple one. He wore it to weddings.

[Tom Griswold]

Do you have that?

[Christy Lee]

He wore it to weddings.

[Tom Griswold]

Did he wear like an ascot?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. And he wore like purple bell bottoms to one wedding. I have arrived.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm here. Was your dad a hippie?

[Chick McGee]

I don't know what he was.

[Tom Griswold]

He was flamboyant. Was he one of those like Hugh Hefner?

[Chick McGee]

Very much like a portly Hugh Hefner. I sure would have loved to have.

[Christy Lee]

Very flamboyant, purple scarves. Active in the theater.

[Chick McGee]

Absolutely.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, lucky you're here.

[Chick McGee]

Six kids.

[Tom Griswold]

Wonder who's.

[Chick McGee]

I'm the oldest of six. We all look like him. Tell where we came from.

[Tom Griswold]

Tied a toothbrush to it one night and got it to work for a lady.

[Sam Miller]

Okay.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

I didn't know they used it.

[Chick McGee]

No one talked about that back then.

[Christy Lee]

In utero. That far back.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow. No, I love your story about your dad and the Shakespeare. You know what I'm talking? Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

I would take. He would take me to the Stratford Festival up in Canada, and I guess I was precocious at 11. And we were driving up this joke. I was driving up, I said, dad, did Romeo and Juliet. Juliet sleep together? He says, well, in the Chicago company, they did.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, that's so great, Chick.

[Chick McGee]

Do you at least like Pat's dad would say, I like the way your.

[Christy Lee]

Dad talked, that's for sure.

[Chick McGee]

When he was directing a group, group of men. And he wanted them. I need you to be more masculine. The chorus, more masculine. Men. Balls, Props. Balls. Do it with balls. And then he would yell, props.

[Tom Griswold]

You have got to start writing this thing. That is so great.

[Christy Lee]

Did you have in holidays and things, did your father bring home like Uncle Steve or anything like that?

[Chick McGee]

We had various theater people around all the time. We had these two women that would come by, Sylvia and Tony. And I never knew what was up with Sylvia and Tony until I got older. Oh, it was all kinds of people. It was fantastic. What was up with them? Oh, they were together, partners.

[Tom Griswold]

Those were different times. I. We had a couple down the road that were quote, unquote, sisters.

[Chick McGee]

So they weren't no kid. But you guys, did you think they were sisters?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, they're great people. In those days, you just assumed. Yeah, it was just one of those things.

[Chick McGee]

They were just friends.

[Christy Lee]

Didn't your mother teach phys Ed? I mean, come on.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, my mother taught.

[Christy Lee]

And an amazing athlete, right?

[Tom Griswold]

My mother was a very good athlete, yes.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, my mom's the one who played catch with me, not my dad.

[Christy Lee]

Huh.

[Chick McGee]

Your dad was playing catch with somebody? I don't know about that.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm a bottom.

[Chick McGee]

And Shakespeare. What was your dad's first name? Joseph. Gerald.

[Tom Griswold]

He went by Jerry.

[Chick McGee]

Jerry.

[Christy Lee]

Jerry. Pat will do all of this, but he won't go to that last step. Oh, no, no. That never happened. There's no way.

[Chick McGee]

Well, I always got the impression your dad was more of a. He was like the straight guy in the theater. And so he was like the ladies man in a way. Yeah, he.

[Tom Griswold]

He got all the side.

[Chick McGee]

He dilly dallied with people he should, probably shouldn't have.

[Christy Lee]

Had he been gay, I think it made him even cooler.

[Chick McGee]

He was pretty cool.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I.

[Tom Griswold]

And your dad went to the opera every week, right?

[Chick McGee]

Every Monday by himself. One ticket to the Metropolitan Opera.

[Tom Griswold]

Did he ever take you?

[Chick McGee]

He did. To one.

[Tom Griswold]

Which one?

[Chick McGee]

Lobom. Ah. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

I go by myself because I'm orally pleased in the balcony.

[Chick McGee]

Midnight Cowboy.

[Tom Griswold]

You understand?

[Christy Lee]

Boy, you can't be there. It'll throw me off.

[Chick McGee]

Steve will get mad.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you enjoy the opera?

[Chick McGee]

I couldn't believe how good it was. Yeah, it was amazing. The production was. I mean, they had animals on stage and it was incredible.

[Christy Lee]

You know how they made those animals do whatever they wanted?

[Chick McGee]

Prods.

[Christy Lee]

They. When the animals misbehaved, they beat them. And then when they did what they wanted, they stopped the beatings. So you see.

[Tom Griswold]

Really?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

At the Opera House. Huh?

[Christy Lee]

Huh?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, boy, they were savages.

[Tom Griswold]

That had to be really rough backstage.

[Chick McGee]

No, that's where my dad's ashes are at the Met.

[Christy Lee]

Elephant crap everywhere.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, 1/6th of them.

[Christy Lee]

I have the one who measured them.

[Chick McGee]

My. My stepmother.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you.

[Chick McGee]

With a cup or did you have mine in a cup?

[Christy Lee]

Did you think she was making biscuits?

[Chick McGee]

I don't know what she.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you just distribute them on the floor there?

[Chick McGee]

My brother did. My brother James did.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Wow.

[Chick McGee]

On the stage. He got in trouble too. It's highly illegal in the middle of the performance.

[Christy Lee]

You can't. You can't just go willy nilly. Spreading ashes.

[Tom Griswold]

They do it at a lot of stadiums all the time.

[Chick McGee]

Why are the Three Tenors caught coughing so much?

[Tom Griswold]

How did he get up to the stage?

[Chick McGee]

I don't know. I mean, he's all over New York, so maybe he tore it. You can tour it.

[Tom Griswold]

Did they? Oh, okay. Well, I'm sorry, we need to move back to the sports.

[Christy Lee]

Your brother's very active.

[Chick McGee]

Yes, he is. He's in the arts. There's some painting. Oh, he knows dancing, choreography, ballet. Ballet, Mostly.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm sorry. So we've established everyone's porn name, is that correct?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Stupid world record.

[Christy Lee]

Man from my vacation spot, Cyprus, has broken the Guinness World Record for the most wine glances. The most wine glasses balanced on his head yet. Professional bus boy.

[Chick McGee]

Are you finished with that, ma'am? Stacking it on top of his head.

[Christy Lee]

No, no.

[Pat Godwin]

Perfection.

[Christy Lee]

Professional glass dancer.

[Chick McGee]

Glass dancer.

[Tom Griswold]

Is that a major at any school?

[Christy Lee]

Aristotelis valoritis is shattered. The previous record, by the way. You have that, Josh? I didn't know how to tell you.

[Chick McGee]

Okay, that's what that is.

[Christy Lee]

Aristotle is the lesions.

[Tom Griswold]

And this is eczema.

[Christy Lee]

A previous record of 270 wine glasses balanced on his. That's the old record. The new record is 319 wine glasses balanced on his head.

[Chick McGee]

Well, I've got to see this here.

[Tom Griswold]

It looks like. Imagine it looks like a wedding cake.

[Pat Godwin]

It's.

[Tom Griswold]

It's trays, okay? It's trays of glasses.

[Christy Lee]

They have trays in between the glasses.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but it's. It's stacked up, it's got to be 3 or 4ft high. And it's. He's got it on his head and he's walking around counterfeit. It's. And there's no, by the way, there's no wine in the glasses. So he's busing the table after the drunks. It's amazing, fun, pointless, everything. We love you.

[Christy Lee]

To break the record, nine trays of glasses were stacked on top of one another that the 62 year old Aristotelis then placed on top of his head. Not only did he balance them for over double the minimum time required, 10 seconds, but he also moved around and gently danced before the glasses eventually came toppling down. The total weight of the glasses was 66 pounds. And of course, several of the onlookers were cut by some of them.

[Chick McGee]

Many, many lacerations.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Gerald Godwin, your thoughts on glass dancing. I like it. I like the choreography. I was looking at a song. I can't pronounce it today. Actually working.

[Christy Lee]

Next.

[Tom Griswold]

It's worth seeing a picture of this glass. It's pretty amazing.

[Chick McGee]

What the hell's glass don't you remember the movie Glass Dance? She was dancing around and then she sat on a chair, pulled a rope and a bunch of shards of glass fell.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, what a feeling. Yeah, Glass Dance.

[Chick McGee]

It was an awful film, really.

[Tom Griswold]

Flash dancing. That wasn't really a thing. They just invented that for the movie. Right.

[Chick McGee]

I've honestly never seen Flashdance. I only know that scene.

[Christy Lee]

You don't think there were part time strippers? I think that's what she was a. Worked at a.

[Pat Godwin]

She was a welder.

[Christy Lee]

It was a welder. And she worked as a stripper at night.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, she's not just a dancer, she's a. She's stripping. Did she.

[Pat Godwin]

I don't think she was a stripper.

[Tom Griswold]

Pretty sure. Wow. No, she was just a dancer.

[Christy Lee]

No, it's like right middle of the dances.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I think she like.

[Chick McGee]

That'S real cool with the water in the bucket and everything, but. Beaver time. Let's see that. Do you remember in Forrest Gump Tom, the Jenny is up there, she's like trying to. You know, she's playing the guitar naked and there are these rowdy men in the front row.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, that's right.

[Chick McGee]

And one of them yells out, get her a harmonica. I was the. And it's sad in the scene, but I was the only person in the crowded theater that laughed out loud.

[Tom Griswold]

Do you ever hear our Sherry Lewis tribute clamshop thing?

[Christy Lee]

The puppeteer.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, clam chop. Remember that? It's a very. A very unusual ventriloquist.

[Chick McGee]

Oh no, that's a heck of a skill, isn't it?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I remember that. We move forward and return to the sports page with Chick McGee. Stupid world record.

[Christy Lee]

Britain's. Britain's 12th oldest man.

[Chick McGee]

Oh yeah. What is this now?

[Christy Lee]

Britain's 12th oldest man just turned 107.

[Tom Griswold]

That's amazing. Now you're probably wondering why did I choose this story? You're going to find out.

[Christy Lee]

He recently revealed the secret to his long life. Eating the cereal known as Shredded Wheat.

[Tom Griswold]

Shredded Wheat, My favorite cereal.

[Chick McGee]

How about that?

[Christy Lee]

Mr. Leonard Howes of the United Kingdom, born in 1916.

[Chick McGee]

Congratulations, Tom. You have something in common with one of the oldest people on the planet.

[Tom Griswold]

That's right. Once again, the benefits of a classical education.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, is that right? You learned each should it Wheat.

[Christy Lee]

Leonard served in World War II and he was old then and has seen five different monarchs on the throne.

[Tom Griswold]

About that.

[Christy Lee]

Oh well, they're using the bathroom. That's weird.

[Chick McGee]

That is weird.

[Christy Lee]

Ms. Carol House, his daughter in a daughter in law.

[Tom Griswold]

How old is this guy again?

[Christy Lee]

107.

[Tom Griswold]

Because of what?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, shredded.

[Tom Griswold]

Shredded weight.

[Sam Miller]

That's what he says.

[Christy Lee]

I guess in the absence. Abstract, that might be the interpretation. I don't think it is.

[Tom Griswold]

That's why I live so long. That and the fact that During World War II, he was in the mail room.

[Chick McGee]

That probably helped.

[Christy Lee]

He put his long life down to eating shredded Wheat with full fat milk and plenty of sugar for as long as he could remember. There you go.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, boy. That's delicious.

[Christy Lee]

Doesn't say anything about equal there, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, I ate my Shredded Wheat with skim milk.

[Chick McGee]

I eat mine with mustard. I like to just dip it. I know. Just dip one in mustard and eat it that way. That is fascinating.

[Tom Griswold]

Do you.

[Christy Lee]

That's making me sick.

[Chick McGee]

Just buy Triscuits. They're the same thing, almost.

[Tom Griswold]

They are.

[Chick McGee]

But when you're out of Triscuits and you have.

[Pat Godwin]

That's.

[Chick McGee]

That's how it happened.

[Christy Lee]

I didn't know you smoked pot.

[Tom Griswold]

We're going to wrap things up for you here in just a second with some rejected license plates. Funny segment. Come on back for it. This is the Bob and Tom Show. This is the Bob and Tom show for a Thursday. And this is Christopher in the Bob and Tom Studios. Here's our last segment this morning. It's about rejected license plates.

[Christy Lee]

I'm Chick McGee. And here's our leader, our founder, Mr. Number One Fearless Leader.

[Chick McGee]

Big T. Big T. Big T. Yeah. Big T in the house.

[Tom Griswold]

Big T. That's what my. That's what my physical therapist calls me.

[Chick McGee]

Big T. Oh, that's cool. Big T. Really keep you. Keep you motivated.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Who called you Mr. TG was that in the Bahamas?

[Tom Griswold]

That was a. A server lady in the Bahamas. Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Server lady in the Bahamas.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't mean to. Some people get upset with the word waitress, but she was.

[Christy Lee]

Do you remember what the lady of the Bahamas called me?

[Pat Godwin]

I do remember this.

[Chick McGee]

No, I didn't hear this.

[Christy Lee]

Sugar Bush.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, that's so good, because my.

[Christy Lee]

My beard was.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, more salt and peppery then.

[Pat Godwin]

I can never forget that because my mother lived in the Sugar Bush condominium.

[Christy Lee]

She looked a little bit like a Della Reese.

[Pat Godwin]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

Did she have a sweet.

[Tom Griswold]

Much like. Much like earlier today? You couldn't say the joke you had in mind out loud?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, you can't say.

[Sam Miller]

I can't either.

[Tom Griswold]

It's. Mine's different.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. She called me equally offensive. We live together for three and a half years.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, lovely. Give it a shot.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, We. We got.

[Christy Lee]

I gave it a shot.

[Tom Griswold]

We got to get to. We Got to get to this new story about license plates, but I want.

[Christy Lee]

To go back to the one that you gave us before we took a break.

[Pat Godwin]

Which one?

[Christy Lee]

B Chicken. CK Booty.

[Tom Griswold]

Set this. Set this up, will you?

[Pat Godwin]

Officials are sharing some of the personal vanity license plates that were rejected in 2023 at the Indiana Bureau of Motor Vehicles. They include.

[Christy Lee]

Where's this?

[Pat Godwin]

Indiana.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Some of these are also. We have another list from Canada.

[Pat Godwin]

Y.

[Tom Griswold]

Equally interesting.

[Pat Godwin]

All right, so we left you with.

[Tom Griswold]

CKNB UT and it's not chicken butt, but thank you.

[Pat Godwin]

Christy knows I. Chicken butt.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Pat Godwin]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

These are the ones that the. They were. They wouldn't give these to people.

[Pat Godwin]

No. All right. This one's kind of cute. I can't believe they didn't let this one out. Geo Ta Space poo.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, got a poo that's kind of.

[Christy Lee]

Got a poo that's.

[Tom Griswold]

I think they're trying to keep it away from the scatological. I think is the logic. Um, so I mentioned I. It's my understanding from talking to someone that works at one of these license branches, they.

[Christy Lee]

Is that your understanding?

[Tom Griswold]

They.

[Christy Lee]

And you expect us to believe you know someone who works at a license.

[Pat Godwin]

Uh huh.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. She used to work here, actually.

[Pat Godwin]

That's true.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. A list is being is circulated among all the states that have the vanity plates just to kind of be the lookout. And there are people that always get away with something. Oh yeah, here's one that I love. This is not on the list of forbidden ones. This is on an actual vehicle. It's. This is on a. From Pearl River, Mississippi. Beautiful plate.

[Christy Lee]

That's where Elvis was born.

[Tom Griswold]

It's RZL D A Z L Razzle dazzle. Razzle dazzle.

[Pat Godwin]

Wow. Well, I saw this one last night.

[Tom Griswold]

Jeep. Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

2T TH F1XR Think about it.

[Chick McGee]

Tooth fixer.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

So a dentist perhaps.

[Pat Godwin]

Isn't that cute?

[Christy Lee]

You think I should get P PL S H R H O L E. You think I could get that?

[Pat Godwin]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

You know what you could get. You could get me some.

[Dave Landau]

You could get.

[Pat Godwin]

No.

[Chick McGee]

Chick.

[Christy Lee]

P lshr H O L E. You.

[Tom Griswold]

Could get me some coffee. Yeah. Could you go into a broad RL I'd like something from my. The place. I'm.

[Chick McGee]

I'm still trying to figure this out. Yeah. I don't know. You know what it is, Tom? P L S A r Hole.

[Christy Lee]

S H R S H R Pleasure hole.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh.

[Chick McGee]

Oh. I still don't know what the pleasure hole is.

[Pat Godwin]

You don't? On Chick.

[Christy Lee]

Stop by and just not on me.

[Tom Griswold]

I just press Chick's prostate button. Oh, by the way, I'd like to clarify Sugar Bush. Someone that wrote a letter. Prostate no R. Frostrate. Means you're lying down, getting your prostate checked. Okay, once again, these are rejected license, vanity license plate suggestions.

[Pat Godwin]

Some of these aren't. They don't seem that bad to me. What's this mean? Zero, I guess. B, O, L, L, O, X.

[Tom Griswold]

That's an English.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, that's. That's a cuts. Cussing in England. In Indiana, it should be fine, but in Canada, it may not be.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, see, some of these are from Canada.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, this one was from Indiana. I said one.

[Tom Griswold]

Doobie numeral one.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

D, O, O, B, I, E. They don't want too many drug references.

[Pat Godwin]

The next one right down.

[Sam Miller]

Movie.

[Christy Lee]

I should get Pleasure Hole.

[Tom Griswold]

Hang on a second now, Chick.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Restraint for the next one.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Pat Godwin]

Numeral four.

[Tom Griswold]

Numeral four.

[Pat Godwin]

Space, Q, A. Oh, N, I, L. Okay.

[Chick McGee]

When you're a fan, you're a fan.

[Tom Griswold]

I guess that person is pro.

[Christy Lee]

Let me write it down. I'm not getting 4 and.

[Tom Griswold]

4.

[Christy Lee]

A.

[Tom Griswold]

So when this guy. When this guy shows up at your daughter's for the prom in his minivan.

[Chick McGee]

No kidding.

[Tom Griswold]

With the four anil plate.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, how much with I instead of a.

[Tom Griswold]

Now here's a more subtle one. You'll. You'll. You'll need your pencil for this one. A55.

[Chick McGee]

Ass.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, is this.

[Christy Lee]

Is this like movies on one of Those old calculators?

[Tom Griswold]

M4N.

[Christy Lee]

Ass man. Yeah. Ass man. Yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And then this next one puzzles me. I don't know why they would. Do you have the next one that starts with an A? V, G?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, A V, G, S, I, Z.

[Chick McGee]

E. Oh, average size.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, I thought it was vag season.

[Chick McGee]

That's cute. No, it's rabbit season. A bad season.

[Christy Lee]

Wabbit season.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. You know, it's funny because I walked into rei, I walked into REI last week. I said, hey, listen, I'm looking for. Is it bad season? No, no, that's. It's.

[Christy Lee]

It's.

[Tom Griswold]

It's only bow and arrow veg.

[Christy Lee]

You can only use the bow and arrow.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, this next one is average size.

[Chick McGee]

Should go.

[Pat Godwin]

That's average size. Seems okay.

[Chick McGee]

Lighten up.

[Tom Griswold]

I bet they thought it meant penis. Yeah, I bet they thought it meant vag size.

[Pat Godwin]

No, I bet they meant.

[Tom Griswold]

I said, that's why this next one is tricky. It's A, letter B.

[Christy Lee]

Booty Ho.

[Tom Griswold]

Letter B. Numeral 1. Letters. G, T, T, Y, S. Go ahead, go ahead.

[Pat Godwin]

Big mouth.

[Tom Griswold]

It's okay. Don't. Don't encourage them. Yeah, it's the one. The one looks much like a capital I as an. I wish you'd shut up.

[Pat Godwin]

Be careful.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, the next one. I can see this one there.

[Chick McGee]

Look at this one.

[Christy Lee]

Now that guy made business.

[Chick McGee]

The vanity plate really is just iddies I, D, D, I, E, S that he has. Is it a Tennessee? Tennessee?

[Pat Godwin]

No, I think it's a Taylor University.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Which is a Christian college.

[Christy Lee]

This guy rolls up in my driveway for my Christmas party. It's going to be a great party. Yeah, that guy knows what he's doing.

[Tom Griswold]

That can't be real.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, well, look.

[Chick McGee]

It certainly looks real.

[Pat Godwin]

It looks real.

[Chick McGee]

There's a guy in my neighborhood that.

[Pat Godwin]

Just says dumper across.

[Chick McGee]

I have a picture on my phone and it just says dumper.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Pat Godwin]

Now that got by.

[Chick McGee]

So, yeah, I don't know what he does.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, here's one. There'll be no speaking after I read this one. Are we clear on this?

[Christy Lee]

Yes, sir.

[Tom Griswold]

Fu xu numeral 2.

[Chick McGee]

I can't figure that one out. I don't see anything wrong with that.

[Tom Griswold]

That's fine.

[Pat Godwin]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, they. They rejected that one.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, I understand that one.

[Christy Lee]

How in the hell would that ever get by?

[Tom Griswold]

This one didn't get by. Letter, C, space, W, O, R, D. Oh, now this one's a little.

[Pat Godwin]

I like this one.

[Christy Lee]

Are there. Are there both out there that are named C?

[Tom Griswold]

Word? Sea.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Has a C word.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Sea.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Classy. You're going to spend a million dollars on a beautiful vessel.

[Christy Lee]

C word.

[Pat Godwin]

How about this one? B, I, G, big space, space, P.

[Tom Griswold]

E, N. Maybe it was. Maybe the guy has a large ball peen hammer, maybe large Bic pen.

[Chick McGee]

Here comes old big peen.

[Christy Lee]

Yo, Big bean.

[Tom Griswold]

Denny's is here.

[Chick McGee]

That's it. He goes to Taylor, you fool.

[Tom Griswold]

He's studying to be a reverend.

[Christy Lee]

It is big P. Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, there's more.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, goody.

[Chick McGee]

You think they'd let me put my last name on a license plate? I bet you. I bet they would question it. Yeah. I can't do an NFL jersey even.

[Christy Lee]

Though they're bummer fair.

[Tom Griswold]

Hooker was an NFL player?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

There are like three or four hookers playing right now in the NFL.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, it has to be team specific. Do you think they'd give you J. Hooker? I don't know. I don't. Yeah, I haven't tried that.

[Tom Griswold]

How about B.J. hooker?

[Chick McGee]

Wasn't that William Shatner?

[Tom Griswold]

B.J. hooker, $5.

[Christy Lee]

Heather Locklear. That's all she got on the job.

[Pat Godwin]

Here's one that used to be a bit of ours. Mr. Space. Oh, F, I, S, T, R. Hey, Mr. Fister.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. I feel like a part's been cut out. It's like hearing shave in a haircut. Not the second part.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Are we.

[Tom Griswold]

Are we allowed to play Mr. Fister anymore?

[Christy Lee]

I don't think we're allowed to do.

[Chick McGee]

Whatever you want once.

[Christy Lee]

You know, my dad always used to tell me that nothing's against the law if you don't get kind.

[Pat Godwin]

I don't get this one.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Pat Godwin]

R, I, Z, Z, L, E, R. What's wrong with Rizzler?

[Chick McGee]

Rizzler?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

R, I, Z. I don't get it either.

[Christy Lee]

Isn't Riz like, for charisma? Right.

[Tom Griswold]

Didn't we learn that means charismatic Jizzler?

[Chick McGee]

Could be.

[Pat Godwin]

Is that a typo?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, you change any one letter. Yeah. If he had hit hit city, you know.

[Christy Lee]

Remember I told you any. Any joke that ends in hat. I. I just start laughing at. I. Almost the same with the word Guzzler. I. I kind of like Guzzler.

[Chick McGee]

I bet you do.

[Pat Godwin]

The Canadians are really bizarre.

[Chick McGee]

Canadians are out of their minds. Oh, man.

[Christy Lee]

It's like cold. They can't help it, you know?

[Pat Godwin]

Okay, here we go. These are from Canada.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Pat Godwin]

Yso space.

[Christy Lee]

So slow.

[Pat Godwin]

What's wrong with that?

[Chick McGee]

That's fine.

[Christy Lee]

What? That don't allow that?

[Pat Godwin]

Nope.

[Christy Lee]

H. How about I get. How about I get something for figuring it out so fast?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, you did. You did about a free pass from.

[Tom Griswold]

The rest of the show. You can go home.

[Chick McGee]

Don't you. Don't you dare. You. You should. You know what? If you have any balls at all.

[Tom Griswold]

You go home, you will walk out.

[Chick McGee]

Of here, and I will get your car gift now. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Pat Godwin]

Bob and Tom.

[Christy Lee]

Hi, I'm Joe Salai, host of the Stacking Benjamin's podcast.

[Tom Griswold]

Every week, we talk to experts about.

[Chick McGee]

Saving, investing, personal finance, trends, crypto.

[Dave Landau]

Can't do it.

[Chick McGee]

You could have done all that research, all the breadcrumbs and thought, this company's never going bankrupt.

[Dave Landau]

Foiled again.

[Tom Griswold]

You never knew personal finance could be this fun.

[Chick McGee]

Throwing down the gauntlet. I'm bringing it today. I'm only going to be off by six figures instead of seven.

[Tom Griswold]

Every boy has a dream, Doc. Every boy has a dream, for sure.

[Christy Lee]

Stacking Benjamins.

[Dave Landau]

Follow and listen on your favorite platform.