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Tom Griswold
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Chick McGee
Favorites are ready at Starbucks. This episode is brought to you by State Farm. Knowing you could be saving money for the things you really want is a great feeling. Talk to a State Farm agent today to learn how you can choose to bundle and save with a personal price plan. Like a Good Neighbor save, State Farm is there. Prices are based on rating plans that vary by state. Coverage options are selected by the customer. Availability, amount of discounts and savings and eligibility vary by state.
Christy Lee
It's the Bob and Tom show.
Chick McGee
We have a phone call.
Christy Lee
Morning, Bob.
Chick McGee
And time shot.
Pat Godwin
You can have two. Carrie.
Josh Arnold
Hello?
Pat Godwin
Yeah. Hey, Bob and Tom.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Pat Godwin
Hi, it's Kenny Tarmac.
Ace Cosby
Hi, Kenny.
Pat Godwin
Hey, we just landed.
Christy Lee
I'm in MCO today.
Pat Godwin
Here's some news. So listen to my day. I have to make. Now I have to make my connection right now. We're Airside One, Gate 16. My connection.
Ace Cosby
Yeah.
Pat Godwin
Side four, Gate 78.
Christy Lee
Oh, how. How you gonna do it?
Pat Godwin
Yeah, do that math. Airside one plus Airside going to make it today.
Chick McGee
Are you on your Bluetooth, Kenny?
Pat Godwin
That's a one take trip. Yeah. Hey, my other phone is vibrating. I keep it on vibrant so that way I won't annoy people. Hang on. I have to take this one. Hang on.
Chick McGee
Oh, go ahead, Ken.
Pat Godwin
Hey, guy. Yeah, we just landed. Well, not yet, because we just landed. Okay, well, let's do this. Then you call Tobiko, tell him I talk to Caldwell, then we'll brief Carmen. Okay. Then fax Morse. I'll see Sully at the seminar. Then we'll all do lunch before the conference call. Yeah, that's the only way to do it. Yeah, easy, like a zucchini martini. Bob. Yeah, I'm on hold with Bob and Tom again, Kenny. Yeah, they couldn't believe I have to go from airside one to airside four.
Chick McGee
We were astonished.
Pat Godwin
I should take a puddle jumper to Airside 4. I know, I know. They should give me 50 more sky miles just for taking the puddle jumper. Hey, Max, don't worry about Tobik. He's a teddy bear. Okay? You tell him I said we've seen this movie before. Yeah, yeah, just follow the flowchart and you'll be fine. Guys, hey, listen, I have an order on the other phone. I'm making magic here. Focus, focus. Okay?
Chick McGee
I gotta run, okay?
Pat Godwin
God, is that guy long winded I tell you, I have to go from airside one today.
Chick McGee
Yeah, we heard before.
Pat Godwin
I have to run now. I wish time to talk all day. I just don't have that kind of time today.
Chick McGee
All right, well, good luck, Kenny.
Pat Godwin
Airside four is, like, miles away. And I'm at airside one. That's gate 16.
Chick McGee
Jeez.
Pat Godwin
Oh, my gosh. I'll probably lose five pounds on the way this fly was. Oh, my God.
Christy Lee
What?
Pat Godwin
I don't believe it's him. I'm looking up at first class now. Is that him? Oh, it's Zig Ziggler. I gotta go.
Christy Lee
Hey there. Hi there. Ho there. It's the mom and Tom show from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Christy Lee at the Silac Insurance news desk.
Tom Griswold
Hi.
Christy Lee
A vision in taupe.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Christy Lee
Beige, Ecru. Off white.
Chick McGee
Clarisil color.
Christy Lee
Eggshell.
Tom Griswold
L color.
Chick McGee
It is.
Tom Griswold
Really?
Christy Lee
You got your. You got your bang swept over. I approve.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, they're so long. They're like.
Christy Lee
There you go.
Chick McGee
They're what?
Tom Griswold
Cousin it.
Chick McGee
Oh. Oh, boy. I heard that wrong. If you got bangs down here.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, that. That would be something.
Christy Lee
They are the. It bangs. All right.
Chick McGee
Do they make zit cream in shades of various skin tones?
Christy Lee
Hey, Pat Godwin. How are you? There's Josh Arnold. I'm Chick Ace Cosby. Hello, Tom.
Chick McGee
I did not know that. How many is it like Crayola? You get a whole stadium.
Ace Cosby
So you can get white and you can get beige.
Chick McGee
White and beige. Okay. All right. Just asking.
Tom Griswold
I never had that problem. So I don't know.
Chick McGee
Never had any zits.
Tom Griswold
Not really. I'd have one, like, right here. During that time of month.
Christy Lee
Looks like somebody put out a pizza with a. Oh, goodness gracious.
Chick McGee
Oh, yeah, Yeah. I wrestled with those for a while myself.
Christy Lee
Fat pimply paste kid. There's no way to live, boy. I can tell you that.
Chick McGee
Yeah, that's.
Christy Lee
Oh, yeah, that's.
Tom Griswold
Roughed your dad the other night.
Christy Lee
No way to live, boy.
Chick McGee
Yeah. At one point, some of my kids were on that Accutane stuff.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
Which, by the way, is more difficult to get than morphine. You have to fill out this form that's inch thick, and you. Every. Every month, you had to get the prescription renewed. He had to go over to the doctor's office. It was unbelievable. But. And very effective, but quite dangerous, apparently. So I was just curious because your sweater is the color of a Clearasil.
Tom Griswold
Whatever.
Chick McGee
Yeah, no, no, it's. It's a nice way to start the day. You blend right in with.
Tom Griswold
Yeah. You know, I thought, how could I. How could I offend him? I'm wearing.
Chick McGee
No, could be worse. You could be wearing chick sweater, which is the color of dog manure.
Christy Lee
I. I anticipated this comment as I was putting it on this morning. Well, it'll give him something to say.
Chick McGee
Well, I got a letter here.
Christy Lee
All right.
Chick McGee
I want to get right to it.
Christy Lee
Okay.
Chick McGee
The other night on Jeopardy. The category was three letter words for body parts.
Christy Lee
Arm.
Tom Griswold
Leg.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Ace Cosby
Ear.
Chick McGee
Keep going. Good. Keep going.
Ace Cosby
Ear.
Tom Griswold
He said ear.
Josh Arnold
Oh, sorry, I didn't hear you.
Christy Lee
How about a lip?
Chick McGee
Yep, those are all good, huh?
Tom Griswold
What are we missing?
Chick McGee
Gum.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
Toe. Very good, by the way. This? Yeah, yeah.
Christy Lee
Yeah. That'd be slang, though, right?
Chick McGee
Yeah. Nut.
Christy Lee
They accepted nut.
Chick McGee
No, I'm just expanding on the list. This is a letter from James in Columbus, and he says, jimmy James, he said, I think there are a total of 10. They only gave six answers. He has leg, arm, rib, gum, jaw, hip, lip, eye, ear. Toe.
Tom Griswold
Huh.
Chick McGee
I would add box. Oh, okay.
Tom Griswold
Oh, boy.
Christy Lee
Did you say box?
Josh Arnold
He said box.
Chick McGee
Sorry, I just thought of that. Yeah, yeah. Nip. Nip. Sack. Sac.
Tom Griswold
Oh, okay.
Christy Lee
No, that doesn't.
Tom Griswold
That's a purse.
Chick McGee
I always say that. Josh will back me up on this. A C, K. No, I think ball sack. Isn't. Isn't.
Ace Cosby
Oh, no, I think I would accept both, because in biology and anatomy, sac is like sack selling for some sacks.
Chick McGee
Isn't that the technical term? The sackler area?
Christy Lee
No, I don't think so.
Chick McGee
No.
Christy Lee
That's bad slang.
Ace Cosby
Yes.
Chick McGee
Okay. You are. You had. We had nut. We had the T word. Ass. Nip.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
Vag.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
Anymore. Are we forgetting any?
Christy Lee
I've always wanted to be on an itty bitty titty committee. Haven't you wanted to do that every now and then? Josh, your thoughts?
Ace Cosby
I am. I would prefer to be on the other committee. Yeah.
Chick McGee
What about four letter. Four letter words for body part?
Christy Lee
Let's start with slit. Go ahead.
Chick McGee
Very good, very good. Buns.
Ace Cosby
Sure. Well, have we met? Plural then.
Christy Lee
If you count in plural.
Chick McGee
Okay. How about dong?
Christy Lee
Just one of the many reasons you're not on Jeopardy. It takes. They have to edit the hell out of dawn Now. Can. Let me tell you something, John. Is that good?
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
Junk. Ball. Meat. Dong.
Christy Lee
Okay. Junk, then. Junc. Right.
Chick McGee
No, no, no, no.
Tom Griswold
Four letter words, remember?
Chick McGee
It's not juncular, it's just secular.
Christy Lee
You're sacular.
Chick McGee
Okay, well, thank you very much for pointing that out to James. We certainly appreciate if anyone has any additions to those, I'd Love to be a part.
Christy Lee
Anybody? Anything about body parts? Y in. Boy, oh, boy. You beat everything, you know that?
Chick McGee
It's one of the few things we have in common.
Christy Lee
Body parts.
Chick McGee
Yeah, most of us have.
Christy Lee
This guy named Ryan is upset. This is a listener email. We'll give you a preview of the mail coming up. This. All this says is, hello, Bob and Tom show. So, dot, dot, dot, you'll read that broad's letter, but you have yet to read mine. Okay. That's the whole letter. Oh, I don't know who's he referring to, but he's upset. This is Ryan in Washington, Iowa.
Chick McGee
Was that the letter from the person who just wanted you to read a letter?
Christy Lee
No, that was a guy, so I thought.
Chick McGee
I don't know what that is.
Christy Lee
I don't know. We read some broads letter and he. We didn't read him.
Chick McGee
Broad is how he describes her.
Christy Lee
Oh, like you have. Like you haven't called a girl abroad a skirt, a doll.
Chick McGee
No, I'm not living in the 50s.
Tom Griswold
Oh, yes, you are.
Christy Lee
No, you prefer round heel, right?
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Christy Lee
Something people use.
Chick McGee
Yeah, a little history about it. The young lady who wrote the deep questions yesterday, remember that? She wanted a little bit more about us.
Tom Griswold
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Chick McGee
So if you're new to the show, Deep.
Christy Lee
They are.
Chick McGee
She has a few more for us.
Christy Lee
Oh, God.
Tom Griswold
God. Yeah.
Chick McGee
This will, what is your favorite Christmas movie? Now, hers is Elf, and I know that's not on your list.
Ace Cosby
Yeah, it's one of my least favorites.
Chick McGee
Yeah. Christy, you have a favorite.
Christy Lee
No, no, no, no. Wait a minute. I think Josh should continue. Now. What's your. What's your hang up with Elf? I don't understand. It has a solid.
Ace Cosby
It really does have a solid premise. I shouldn't not get it, because here's what happens.
Christy Lee
Okay, he's an elf.
Ace Cosby
He's an elf, but he's a grown man. Oh, he's tall. His bed is too small. He's an adult man, but he loves candy.
Chick McGee
Oh, God.
Christy Lee
Oh, my God.
Chick McGee
I. I'm with you, Josh, but there are people that love that movie.
Tom Griswold
I like that movie, but love actually is my favorite Christmas movie.
Ace Cosby
Okay, you want to get it going on.
Chick McGee
That's awesome. And then you get into the whole thing about Die Hard. Yeah, I'm gonna go with Mr. Magoo's Christmas character.
Christy Lee
Of course you are.
Ace Cosby
That's a television special.
Christy Lee
No one's seen it.
Chick McGee
No, we're trying to enlighten this woman as to our taste. If it has to be a movie. Mo movie, it's pretty hard to beat Christmas Story. I. I will sit through that almost every time.
Tom Griswold
What's the one with really Cosby and Rosemary Clooney?
Chick McGee
Holiday Inn.
Tom Griswold
That one is really up there for me.
Chick McGee
Really?
Tom Griswold
I love that movie. Okay, Pat go the dancing in that is incredible.
Josh Arnold
A Christmas Story.
Chick McGee
Yes. Is there a good. Did they make that into a musical?
Josh Arnold
A Christmas Story.
Chick McGee
Did they make that into a Broadway show or something? I don't think so.
Christy Lee
I don't think so.
Chick McGee
Or maybe a play. Who knows? Is there a good Christmas?
Tom Griswold
Holiday Inn. I just said that.
Chick McGee
But I mean, I said movie, musical.
Christy Lee
I think they jammed White Christmas into the Holiday Inn.
Chick McGee
They've had that's been in a couple. Isn't there a movie called White Christmas also?
Christy Lee
Y. Well, the original title was Whites Only Christmas.
Josh Arnold
It was a different time.
Christy Lee
It was a different.
Chick McGee
You all feel good about yourself?
Christy Lee
Mine's the one with Jimmy Stewart. I figured.
Ace Cosby
Good luck finding a copy of that.
Josh Arnold
It's a wonderful training of a white boxer.
Christy Lee
That and Song of the South. Good. Good luck.
Chick McGee
Okay.
Christy Lee
Hey, what's going on?
Chick McGee
We got. We have more questions from Heather.
Christy Lee
Yeah, we'll get to.
Chick McGee
After I wash down the show.
Christy Lee
I bet you he's talking about this broad. Heather. That's who he's talking about.
Chick McGee
Could you stop using the term broad?
Ace Cosby
It just refers to their hips.
Christy Lee
Yes.
Chick McGee
Hey, that's where it comes from.
Ace Cosby
A broad hipped child.
Christy Lee
Childbearing.
Chick McGee
Not their boobs.
Ace Cosby
No.
Josh Arnold
Why would they childbearing.
Tom Griswold
Why would you have broad boobs if you have broad boobs? That's weird.
Chick McGee
By the way, remind me during the break to show you a photograph paper this morning. Dear God.
Christy Lee
Muscular.
Chick McGee
No, it's just the photographer took the photograph at the absolute. Maybe on purpose. The angle of the photograph makes this woman who's involved in a very serious thing. It makes her look like all boobs. It's just this. The weird camera angle. Sorry. I know. That's very visual.
Christy Lee
Who wants to guess that he's the only one that can see this?
Chick McGee
Oh, no, no, no, no. If I'm wrong, I'll give you $20.
Christy Lee
I don't know how money has to come into it. Go ahead.
Chick McGee
Just because I like being right. You know what I had just a few minutes ago?
Tom Griswold
What'd you ask?
Chick McGee
Right here. Look at this. This is called liquid science Arctic freeze. Oh, yeah, from Java House. I'm gonna have another one. It's not coffee, of course. We love the Java House coffee. It is the official coffee of the Bob and Tom show. The peel and pour Pods. But Java House also has something I'm just getting into. Hydration drinks. They also have energy drinks, lattes, tea, of course. And even hot cocoa. What is Java House all about? It's about revolutionizing the world of your beverages. Great for the office. In our green room next door here, we have a couple dozen different types of beverages. And you don't have to put them in the Keurig machines. You just take this stuff. As you can see, it's a little tiny. Let me get a different one here. It's a. What do you call. It's a pod.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
Peel the top off, pour it in, and shazam. You've got your coffee right away. Add hot water.
Christy Lee
Shazam.
Chick McGee
Isn't that the magic word? Abracadabra.
Christy Lee
Shazam.
Tom Griswold
Shazam.
Chick McGee
Voila. Yeah. Shazam. With kind of a hillbilly accent. Shazam. Uncle Clam.
Christy Lee
I think that's how the kid turns into Captain Marvel.
Chick McGee
Right. I'll talk to my friends, to Chava House. See if they want to come out with a. With a version of a moonshine. Moonshine? Uncle Clem's moonshine. Illegal in 49 states.
Tom Griswold
I might need a different license.
Chick McGee
Yeah, sorry.
Christy Lee
Watch out for them revenuers.
Tom Griswold
Although they do have an espresso martini that you can.
Chick McGee
They do. It's our friends at Java House. And they got something going on right now. You go to java house.com and you click on the. What's it called? The thing there?
Tom Griswold
The icon?
Chick McGee
The tab. The tab.
Tom Griswold
Oh, the tab.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Chick McGee
There you go. That says Java House for your office. And you could find yourself with a free in office demo. So find out about the revolution in coffee, et cetera, et cetera. Teas, lattes, energy drinks from our friends at Java House. Visit them@java house.com. coming up in the news, lots of exciting things. And coming up in sports. I woke up in the middle of the night and I was reading some stuff. And a melee in the wnba.
Christy Lee
Yep. Involving Caitlin. We'll talk about it. And we have a repeat Stanley cup champion, the Florida Panthers. And why their logo is wrong. Well, we'll talk about it. And congratulations to the Panthers. And I was kind of secretly.
Chick McGee
Me too. Hoping.
Christy Lee
Cheering for the Oils.
Chick McGee
Get that thing back up in Canada.
Ace Cosby
But, my gosh, Florida's good. Marshawn the Rat, he is a killer.
Christy Lee
Sam Reinhardt. Four goals last night. Just four. Correct me if I wrong, that's one more than the Hattie. Okay. That's what they call the Hat Trick.
Chick McGee
Doesn't he need more of a hockey name? Sam Reinhart, like Vladimir Klitschkoff or something. Wasn't there a guy named Klitschkoff is.
Christy Lee
Still in the league?
Chick McGee
Wasn't there like Klitschko Koblenos?
Ace Cosby
Yeah. Was it seen in the hoodie?
Christy Lee
The big hood? It's hard to find him sometimes.
Chick McGee
Also, we have three coffee stories this morning.
Christy Lee
You know the Klitschko brothers, they were heavyweight champs, right?
Chick McGee
There you go. We have three positive coffee stories lowering your risk of death.
Christy Lee
Oh, how about that for that?
Chick McGee
I love these stories.
Christy Lee
That's why I keep printing them.
Chick McGee
I just want one that says coffee cake. Coffee cake and link to eternal life.
Christy Lee
I'm in.
Chick McGee
Cheeseburgers and French fries. Link to eternal life. Coming up from the O'Reilly Auto Part Studios, it's the Bob and Tom Show.
Christy Lee
Three Point. Welcome back. How are you? That means with that music. It's time for. That's right, it's sports.
Tom Griswold
Oh, the harpist.
Christy Lee
What do you think?
Chick McGee
It's calm, calming. This would be nice for a. Maybe a late night show.
Christy Lee
Time now for Fireside Chat.
Ace Cosby
Almost works better as an outro.
Christy Lee
That's sports.
Ace Cosby
That was.
Christy Lee
That was the last you just heard? Sportscast ever.
Ace Cosby
Oh, I would hope not.
Chick McGee
Sports in heaven where both teams win.
Christy Lee
Well, how is that possible? And you don't have a competition?
Chick McGee
No. We'll get to sports coming up.
Christy Lee
Yes, sir.
Chick McGee
You have any more? Anything you want to have. The world of breaking sports.
Christy Lee
You've got the NHL Florida Panthers repeat as Stanley cup champions. They went 5 to 1 last night. Game 6 of the final in Sunrise, Florida. I think that's a made up town, but that's where they play.
Ace Cosby
Sunrise, Sunset, Sunrise.
Chick McGee
That's the time that they just keep doing that.
Ace Cosby
Yeah, they pretty much.
Josh Arnold
Very moving.
Christy Lee
And I think we all agree the Panther, the sexiest of all cats.
Tom Griswold
Oh, gosh.
Christy Lee
Don't you think so?
Tom Griswold
Hot Black Panthers down there.
Christy Lee
A girl coming at you, Tommy.
Tom Griswold
Beautiful green eyes for his.
Ace Cosby
Wilder. Tommy was the albino panther.
Christy Lee
Oh, yes, you're right.
Chick McGee
Why are we talking about approaching a woman? I mean a woman approaching you on her hands and knees. Panthers.
Tom Griswold
Oh, we were talking about strippers. Remember yesterday we were talking about. Or maybe Monday we were talking about strip clubs.
Christy Lee
I believe it's called the stripper crawl.
Tom Griswold
That's correct. Yes.
Ace Cosby
Yeah, that's always sort of sexy.
Josh Arnold
Very hot.
Chick McGee
Yeah. You ever seen that in real life?
Ace Cosby
Yes.
Chick McGee
No, I don't mean. I don't mean it at a strip club. I mean in your home. Have you ever had a woman like you get out of the Shower. And there's a woman going on the ground naked.
Tom Griswold
Going, have you.
Ace Cosby
No, nothing. Not making the big cat noises.
Chick McGee
Would you like that?
Ace Cosby
I. You know, I don't think I'd be opposed to it, but I bet there would be. It sounds fun to me. So it sounds like they're laughing.
Chick McGee
I like the academic approach that Josh has to this question. Must be the early hour. Well, I wouldn't be opposed to it. I think as Chaucer once said.
Ace Cosby
I mean, there is. There are two different ways to deliver it. If it's done completely earnestly, I don't know if I'd like it as much as if it was just being playful and fun.
Christy Lee
And you start laughing and she says something like, what are you laughing for?
Ace Cosby
That'd be awful.
Chick McGee
Is it your request? I did wash that tang because when she.
Ace Cosby
Yeah, she starts crying. I. I complete way faster. I don't want that.
Christy Lee
Have you. Have you ever had. Had to tell somebody you need to complete. Complete your hygiene?
Tom Griswold
Have you?
Christy Lee
No, not me.
Ace Cosby
Haven't. I wanted to.
Christy Lee
But you know what?
Chick McGee
I believe.
Christy Lee
I believe right ahead.
Chick McGee
I believe my attorney just spoke for me. I absolutely have not. Should have.
Ace Cosby
Yes. Yeah.
Tom Griswold
I mean, how would you even approach that?
Ace Cosby
I never figured it out. Well, I did figure it out.
Chick McGee
I think we're not together. Yeah. I think I just want to point something out.
Christy Lee
You know what? There's no coming up.
Tom Griswold
You can also offer to shower together.
Christy Lee
Like, hey, no coming back.
Tom Griswold
Grab a shower.
Chick McGee
Yeah, it's just rather difficult to do when you're in the back of a car outside of a disco.
Ace Cosby
Because I was so. I was shocked that this was. Man, I was 20 something. She. I was shocked that she wasn't. Didn't seem to be aware of it. Ah, it was. I mean, it.
Chick McGee
With the room.
Tom Griswold
Oh, my God.
Ace Cosby
Yeah.
Chick McGee
I mean, I'm gonna just stop and pick up a no pest strip.
Christy Lee
That's one of those 3am conversations that come back to haunt you. You're trying to sleep. Are you awake? Remember when you told me I had to go wash myself? Remember that?
Ace Cosby
You know, you're not so clean down there always.
Christy Lee
I almost told you that, but I didn't because I love you.
Ace Cosby
My mother said I should have told you.
Christy Lee
And my best friend, she told me I should tell you, too.
Chick McGee
I brought it up at the book club.
Tom Griswold
All right. Yeah. That's how we all are.
Chick McGee
Okay. Sorry. Where were we? Oh, we were reading our mail.
Christy Lee
Yes, We. And this A trucker with a CB handle.
Chick McGee
Go ahead. What is it?
Christy Lee
One of my Favorite Disney characters. I'm a trucker. My CB handle is Tigger. It was given to me. My. My grandfather. So it's. It's handed down.
Chick McGee
That makes sense.
Ace Cosby
Bouncing. What stickers do best.
Christy Lee
Our heads are made out of rubber and our bodies are made out of.
Ace Cosby
Whoever does that guy's voice. He did a few in Paul Winchell. He was wonderful. Yeah, wonderful.
Chick McGee
He was the guy that. Jerry Mahoney. The dummies.
Ace Cosby
Gotcha.
Chick McGee
Knucklehead Smith.
Ace Cosby
Yes.
Tom Griswold
Have you seen on Instagram the man that does the voice of Winnie the Pooh?
Ace Cosby
Yes.
Tom Griswold
Talking to his grandson, reading a book. Is it not the cutest thing you've ever heard?
Ace Cosby
Yeah. Like those guys will get together and stuff.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Tom Griswold
He's reading a story to his grandson as Pooh's voice. Oh, it is the cutest.
Christy Lee
Well, the follow up to that, Disney put out initially and charged him for using the Pooh voice.
Ace Cosby
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Find the hell out of him.
Christy Lee
Yeah. I got a. I got an entire platoon of lawyers. I just wanted to let you know there's also a green solution, washer fluid for bugs. We were talking about what's the best washer fluid to use on your windshield? I have my own. He makes it. He's a trucker, and he makes his own washer fluid. All you have to do is put dawn dish soap in your reservoir.
Chick McGee
Really?
Christy Lee
The bugs will come off like nothing. Also, by the way, you have to water it down.
Chick McGee
Right.
Ace Cosby
That's. That's why it goes in the reservoir.
Christy Lee
Yeah, it goes in the reservoir. Yeah. Well, you can water it down if you'd like. Just a little bit.
Ace Cosby
I think he's mixing it sounded to me like it was an additive.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Chick McGee
Oh, so you know. Oh, I. I go. So you don't just put the dawn.
Tom Griswold
In there and it's all sudsy.
Chick McGee
Little. Little gooey there.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Christy Lee
I don't see what's wrong with that.
Chick McGee
Might gum up the works.
Christy Lee
Holding the bottle and opening your window and spraying it on the windshield. From the. From the cab, the dawn.
Chick McGee
We decided that both Chick and I are excessive windshield fluid users. I love that stuff.
Christy Lee
I love it. I was mine. My use was complained about by one Jeff. Oscar. I don't know why, but he certainly did complain.
Chick McGee
Did your thing shoot off over the. Right over the roof of your car?
Christy Lee
It feels so good. Okay. I think they have those. Some of those are adjusted. So if you're driving at 60 miles an hour, the studies have shown that at a certain angle, it will hit your windshield. If.
Chick McGee
What?
Christy Lee
If it's too low because of the speed.
Chick McGee
You're suggesting that that thing adjusts.
Christy Lee
Hang on. I'm not done lying.
Chick McGee
Vortex. Yeah.
Christy Lee
And the, you know this, the angle, the parabolic. They're probably somehow Doppler effect.
Chick McGee
Like a Bentley probably has that feature, the adjustable squirter thingy.
Ace Cosby
Anyway, mine only squirts like over my. If it's been like three days.
Chick McGee
Yeah. If you don't. That's why you have to use it every day.
Tom Griswold
Yeah. Backside.
Chick McGee
Use it or lose it. Oh, yeah. You can kill somebody with that.
Christy Lee
Also. I know you guys. I'll give you a chance to help me. I would like to start the new feature swap shop. He says, I'm trying to sell a 1994 Ford Taurus, 240,000 miles. Uses about a quart of oil a week. Looking to trade for three a three wheeler and maybe some fishing poles.
Chick McGee
Love swap shop.
Christy Lee
There you go. P.S. there's a P.S. tom, I haven't heard the slide whistle in Silac insurance companies and commercials in a while. Did Tom finally shove that up chick's ass? I'll hang up and listen.
Chick McGee
I believe it's still over there.
Christy Lee
I do still have it over here, but it was given the look. There's three looks. There's the look look and there's the medium look. And then there's the look where I have to talk to him via text later about my tenuous position with the show. And that's what I got. So here. Here I am.
Chick McGee
Songs whistle Very good. Very good. If you're just joining us, hello. How are you? It's. This is the Bob and Tom program coming to you from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. We go back to our letter from Ms. Heather, who are new to the show, wanted to hear some answers to questions, background stuff about. About all of us. And her second question is, living or dead, who would you want to have lunch with today?
Ace Cosby
Let's go non family members.
Tom Griswold
Okay.
Ace Cosby
You know what I mean?
Chick McGee
Do you want to go. Let's just go just deceased. How about that?
Tom Griswold
Just deceased.
Ace Cosby
Oh, my dad. Yeah. That's not very fond.
Chick McGee
No, no, no. But not non family members.
Tom Griswold
Non family members that are deceased.
Ace Cosby
And then you said, let's just go deceased.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Christy Lee
What are you talking about?
Josh Arnold
Family members. Clarification. I made it more universal.
Chick McGee
It can't be one of your family members you want to have lunch with that are dead.
Ace Cosby
Yeah, that's what I said. All right.
Christy Lee
For somehow he thought he lost control of the question and he didn't at all you need to clarify it. And he just said exactly the same.
Chick McGee
I think when you open it up to living or dead, it's.
Ace Cosby
I didn't. What I meant.
Christy Lee
Somebody did. Living or dead, you're the only.
Ace Cosby
No, I did not.
Chick McGee
No, she did. I was trying to just.
Ace Cosby
Oh, she did?
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Ace Cosby
She's living or dead?
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Chick McGee
Living or dead. Right. Yeah.
Ace Cosby
Okay.
Chick McGee
Sorry.
Ace Cosby
Gotcha.
Chick McGee
Okay, so I'm sorry, back to you. Who do you want to do, living or dead? What person?
Tom Griswold
Lunch. Lunch.
Ace Cosby
Do not do.
Tom Griswold
Have lunch with. Totally different.
Chick McGee
Yeah, there's. There's entirely different category. Well, you're going to be eating her. Eating her for lunch. No, that's not the case. This category has gotten completely.
Christy Lee
Am I paying or is the dead guy.
Ace Cosby
I'm gonna say. Oh, boy. It's nerdy. Probably I'd go Edgar Allan Poe.
Chick McGee
Really?
Ace Cosby
Yeah. Yeah.
Christy Lee
No kidding.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Ace Cosby
Why not?
Chick McGee
That's it. Well, that's really interesting. Christie.
Tom Griswold
I have no idea.
Chick McGee
John F. Kennedy. No.
Tom Griswold
Why would I want to have dinner or lunch with John F. Kennedy?
Ace Cosby
Why be a charming.
Christy Lee
Why do you.
Chick McGee
There might be a motel near.
Christy Lee
You said, Christie's positive attitude with John Kennedy. I don't understand you.
Tom Griswold
Well, he's Catholic, and he was handsome. And he was.
Chick McGee
Like to ragtop.
Ace Cosby
Used to.
Christy Lee
Banging women while his wife watched.
Chick McGee
Pat.
Josh Arnold
Marlon Brando.
Ace Cosby
Very interesting.
Josh Arnold
Good food, good wine, good talk, A lot of food. Yeah.
Christy Lee
I bet you wouldn't remember the first thing you ate by the time you got.
Chick McGee
I just heard. I just heard a very lengthy interview with Mike Love of the Beach Boys.
Christy Lee
Oh, God. Congratulations.
Tom Griswold
Were you strapped to a chair?
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Chick McGee
Oh, no, he's fasting. He's a really.
Christy Lee
He's fascinating.
Chick McGee
He does not get the credit.
Christy Lee
He was nice to one of my kids, so now Mike loves him. Fascinating.
Chick McGee
He. He does not get the credit. He deserves.
Christy Lee
The lyrics, narcissist.
Chick McGee
The lyrics to songs like Good Vibrations and all that. If you. If it weren't for the lyrics. California, listen to one of Brian Wilson's solo albums. Tell me there's one good song in any of them. And get back to Me.
Ace Cosby
Love and Mercy.
Chick McGee
Oh, what a turd that is.
Josh Arnold
I have a tribute to Brian Wilson coming up.
Chick McGee
Okay, good, good. Yeah. Because he said he was asked who he met and because he's met everybody. They've been famous since 1962.
Christy Lee
Because he wears a Beach Boys hat that says, I'm Mike Love.
Chick McGee
He said he actually. He said Marlon Brando was the most. One of the most interesting people he ever met. Pat, you're in Good company.
Josh Arnold
Yeah, I've heard really cool things.
Chick McGee
Now, we have a lot to get to today.
Christy Lee
I want to meet somebody. Dick Cavett or Larry Gilbert. How about that?
Chick McGee
Dick Cavett's still alive.
Christy Lee
Yeah, I know. Oh, well, you said alive or dead.
Chick McGee
No, I, she did, she did.
Josh Arnold
Get a fun little segment on her hands.
Christy Lee
And whatever you think. I did not do that on purpose. And Larry Gilbert was, you know, he.
Chick McGee
Did, he was the MASH guy.
Christy Lee
Right. Funny thing happened on the forum. He was in the, the Sid Caesar writers room. He was, he did it all, man.
Chick McGee
Yeah, true enough. Now, coming up, we do have some interesting news. In the world of sports, we have Ozzy Osbourne. In the news, I, I, I, we have an interesting.
Tom Griswold
Still alive.
Chick McGee
We have a science.
Christy Lee
Going to hear audio from him answering a question, are we?
Chick McGee
I'll make sure we do. Oh, we have a, we have a special Chick McGee request.
Ace Cosby
What?
Chick McGee
Yeah, a special anniversary request we're going to get to on time. Perhaps a little early. There was something else I wanted to get mentioned. Oh. We have contemporary physics meets the Oreo cookie. And it's quite interesting.
Ace Cosby
Does it have to do with opening it, twisting it open and the cream being on one side?
Chick McGee
I did Google that. Afterward, I can probably find that this story actually involves dunking.
Tom Griswold
Dunking.
Chick McGee
Oh, and it's really interesting. I know this sounds frivolous and pointless. No, wait a minute. That's, that's, that's the object of this show.
Christy Lee
All I know, if you, if the bomb was filled with Oreo cookies instead of plutonium, it would, I don't know.
Chick McGee
Hey, you know me. I want a T shirt that says more plutonium. We'll get to that later. Watch the evening news. You'll know what I'm talking about. We got enough of it.
Christy Lee
I can get you a plutonium for 12 bucks.
Chick McGee
Yeah, we can get rid of a little bit. Won't hurt anybody that I care about. This portion of the Bob and Tom show is brought to you by the Silac Insurance Company. If you've been watching the stock market lately. And by the way, I recommend you don't. It's just a little bit. It's confusing. It goes up, it goes down. That's why I've never been able to pay attention to it. But if you're thinking about your future, and maybe you should, and you're kind of wondering, hey, when I retire down the road a piece of. Am I going to have any money coming in? Because is Social Security going to cut it? Perhaps you should think about Something called an annuity. That's where the Silac folks come in to play. The folks at the Silac Insurance Company, experts in the world of annuities. What is an annuity? Well, it's a way to make sure that you've got money coming in when you retire, money coming in on a regular basis. And by the way, with an annuity from Silac, you can't outlive your money. So see what I'm talking about. See what a Silac annuity can do for you. Some restrictions apply. Learn more by going to silac. That's S I L A C I N S dot com. An easy way, by the way, to get some information is just pick up your phone and call £250 and just say out loud, lifetime income. To get some information. That's £250. Just say lifetime income. Once again, Silac, S I L A C, the Silac Insurance Company. Find out about a lifetime income for you. £250 and say out loud lifetime income. An annuity from the Silac Insurance Company. Plan on it. Live on it. Also coming up. Well, we checked into the hotel and there was an alligator there. Whoops. We'll find out how that happened in Virginia. From the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios, this is the Bob and Tom Show.
Jessica Alsman
Thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom show this morning. Even though we're not too much to look at, you can also watch the show on our YouTube channel.
Christy Lee
Welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. Look at me paying attention. There's Christy Lee. There's Pat Godwin. Hello, Josh Arnold. Hello, Ace Cosby. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts studios. Think O'Reilly Auto Parts for all your car care needs. Get the parts and service you need fast from the professional parts people at O'Reilly Auto Parts. I could have what might be the letter. I know it's the letter of the day, but possibly the. The listener. The letter of all time.
Chick McGee
Okay, then when you're done with this letter, you got to remind me because I had some. Something planned for this segment.
Christy Lee
Oh, I'm sorry. Okay.
Chick McGee
No, because I keep forgetting to do it.
Christy Lee
Okay.
Chick McGee
And I've got something planned for the. It's a special Chick McGee request. Oh. So. But go. You read your letter. Go ahead.
Christy Lee
Dear Bob and Tom show, you had a story about professional cuddling.
Ace Cosby
Yes.
Tom Griswold
Yes. Yesterday.
Chick McGee
Yeah. Yeah. This is. It's one of those dumb filler stories.
Tom Griswold
A dumb filler story. Now people need a hug every now.
Christy Lee
Yes. Connection it's important. You need to check out Cuddle Comfort.
Ace Cosby
Okay.
Christy Lee
A nationwide organization of professional and amateur cuddlers. For the pros, it shows what they charge when available, whether they host or come to you. And Lee, says the writer from Boise, Idaho, by the way, I use the services of a professional cuddler named Mitch Komstein.
Chick McGee
It was very.
Christy Lee
It was very enjoyable.
Ace Cosby
Well, how nice.
Chick McGee
Do they brush their teeth before.
Ace Cosby
I'm sure they're very hygienic.
Tom Griswold
Very, very professional.
Christy Lee
Full disclosure, you need. You don't do well with someone hugging you.
Tom Griswold
No.
Christy Lee
Am I right on that?
Chick McGee
Okay, germs, breath talking.
Christy Lee
What about a family member?
Chick McGee
That's different. Well, I think, obviously, number one golden retriever. We all agree on that. No.
Ace Cosby
Oh, you love. I love hugging.
Christy Lee
I don't know how they did this, but golden retrievers insist on hugging you. I don't know where it happened or I'm glad it did, but paws up on the shoulders, they get right in there, boy. Yeah.
Chick McGee
I mean, a dog cuddle, that makes sense. But a professor, someone coming over and.
Tom Griswold
Like a stranger, people need it.
Ace Cosby
There's the scientific studies.
Tom Griswold
Oh, I agree.
Ace Cosby
Touch is important.
Christy Lee
I would like.
Tom Griswold
Maybe if you got hugged more, you'd be happier.
Christy Lee
I'd like to follow him.
Chick McGee
As happy as this world allows a person to be.
Christy Lee
I think I'd like to follow up Christie's question with, how'd you have kids?
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Christy Lee
Oh, I guess you're holding her by the ass.
Tom Griswold
Oh, yeah. Ivy League style. That's right.
Christy Lee
That's probably what. What happened there?
Chick McGee
So this. I'm sorry. So this guy uses the services of a professional coach?
Christy Lee
Yes, he does. And he. All he said was, it was very enjoyable.
Tom Griswold
There you go.
Christy Lee
That's sincere, succinct, to the point.
Chick McGee
Okay.
Christy Lee
Lee in Boise, Idaho.
Ace Cosby
I'm glad to hear it. And another Idaho.
Christy Lee
Yes.
Ace Cosby
We got to get there.
Christy Lee
We got to get to Boise.
Chick McGee
Once again, I can eat.
Christy Lee
Why? I can eat my weight in potatoes. What do you think?
Tom Griswold
Man, I love potatoes.
Chick McGee
Let's just say. Let's just say you were, I don't know, Friday night, about 11:30. You put a sign up at a gas station, right? Free hugs and just stand there.
Tom Griswold
People have done that.
Christy Lee
I tell you what, I bet you'll end up on the local newscast.
Ace Cosby
I tell you, that person does that at Coachella. They're one of the most popular people there.
Chick McGee
Oh, God. Yeah.
Ace Cosby
But that's, like, the perfect environment for that.
Christy Lee
All the molly and.
Chick McGee
Oh, yeah. The only question is, can the crabs get through the Alpaca homemade sweater.
Tom Griswold
If you saw an attractive woman standing in a street on a corner or something with a sign that said free hugs, you would not hug her.
Chick McGee
Exactly. I would go, this is a trick.
Tom Griswold
A trick?
Chick McGee
Yeah. You think it's a yes. I'm gonna. I'm either gonna get robbed. Yeah.
Ace Cosby
We need to show Tom the video of Kesha going up to Seinfeld and asking.
Christy Lee
Right.
Josh Arnold
That's Tom.
Ace Cosby
If she can hug him. Yeah. And he doesn't recognize her. He doesn't. So he just thinks it's a kind of a goofy looking woman. And he. No, no, no thanks. No thanks.
Chick McGee
What I thought we would do is since we keep forgetting to do this on time, I thought we would do Today in History right now. And I'm going to augment it just.
Christy Lee
Today in History will be augmented slightly by Tom Griswold. Tom.
Chick McGee
This Saturday will be June 21st. Is that correct? And if I'm getting my. If I'm doing the math right here. And we will not be on the air live on Saturday.
Tom Griswold
No.
Chick McGee
So since we're gonna miss that day, and I don't want to forget to do this, I got a nice letter here from Ryan pointing out that it's time for the replay of the famous Chick McGee meltdown. So without any further ado, to celebrate the weekend, we have this. This classic.
Ace Cosby
I gotcha.
Chick McGee
But no Houston.
Tom Griswold
No Houston.
Christy Lee
Houston.
Ace Cosby
Hello there, Houston. Hello there, Houston.
Chick McGee
Whatever.
Christy Lee
But he wants me to stop this. Don't do that.
Ace Cosby
That's irritating.
Christy Lee
Don't ever make that noise again. I can't make Houston.
Chick McGee
All their noise.
Christy Lee
If you make that noise.
Chick McGee
No.
Ace Cosby
Yeah. Stop slide whistling that people can't hear. Houston.
Chick McGee
And hello there.
Tom Griswold
Watching a show breakdown.
Ace Cosby
I wish a team of men and white in white scrubs come in and drag you off while you're. While you're just, hello there.
Josh Arnold
We're going viral.
Chick McGee
And then they.
Ace Cosby
They inject you. They inject you with something as they inject you. It's Houston.
Chick McGee
Houston.
Tom Griswold
Oh, my God. Happy summer.
Chick McGee
Oh, I'm sorry. No. Back to Today in History. This is. This is for you. Pat Godwin in 1682, who, as they say, founded Philadelphia.
Josh Arnold
Oh, geez, Billy. William Penn.
Chick McGee
William Penn. I love when they say that. He founded Philadelphia. Of course, the natives who were living there going, we're already here. You can't. You can't find this place. Who lost it? What if he ever considered calling it Willadelphia?
Ace Cosby
I hope he did consider that.
Chick McGee
He was Pennsylvania.
Christy Lee
That's kind of cool.
Ace Cosby
Yeah.
Chick McGee
If it weren't for him, we'd name it after me. We'd have New Jersey Cream cheese. Although I didn't know this until recently. I think you told me this, Pat. Philadelphia cream cheese is not named after Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.
Josh Arnold
No, it's made in upst. New York. Yeah.
Chick McGee
There's a Philadelphia in upstate New York.
Josh Arnold
No, but that's made there. And they just called it Philadelphia Cream cheese Just made up some. Yeah. Has nothing to do with Philadelphia.
Chick McGee
I see. Well, speaking of products, on this date in 1815, Napoleon defeated at the Battle of Waterloo.
Christy Lee
And Abbott was formed shortly after.
Chick McGee
And. And the. The fine soda water line.
Tom Griswold
Oh, yeah, very good.
Chick McGee
Waterloo. I'm a big fan. In 1873, Susan B. Anthony was fined $100 for voting.
Ace Cosby
She paid in all hers.
Chick McGee
Yes, exactly. Are they still making those?
Ali Breen
I don't know.
Christy Lee
I thought you were gonna say do they still have the vote.
Chick McGee
The so called Butch Buck? I believe they were referred to you.
Christy Lee
Your circle of your tiny sycophant circle. Yeah, Tom, that's a great idea.
Chick McGee
Butch Buck.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Christy Lee
Dyke dollars.
Chick McGee
Yeah. Let's see. 1898, the first amusement pier opens in Atlantic City. Not a lot of games then. You like whack a mole? That's pretty much it.
Christy Lee
I bet the. I bet the. The bottle. The knock the milk bottles over with.
Tom Griswold
That was.
Josh Arnold
They had the diving horse, actually.
Christy Lee
Do you think there was a guy like you there doesn't. That's not very amusing.
Chick McGee
One of those. It was 1898, there was a guy like me there going, all right, I'll guess your disease. Step right up.
Ace Cosby
Let's see the bleeding gums, the. The yellow eyes.
Christy Lee
Radium poisoning. You're going to find out all about it.
Chick McGee
Yeah. Let's see. Amelia Earhart becomes the first woman to fly across the Atlantic.
Christy Lee
Great article on her in the New York Times. It's really good.
Chick McGee
Yeah. Rather enlightening.
Christy Lee
Yeah. History got a lot wrong.
Chick McGee
And she flew across the Atlanta Christie.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
It's amazing.
Tom Griswold
Very.
Chick McGee
It was a guy in her ear going, turn left. Oh, wait a minute. That was in the Pacific. Let's see what else is going on. Happy birthday, Paul McCartney. Does he still sing? When I'm 64.
Tom Griswold
I don't know, maybe 42.
Chick McGee
Yeah. He's 83.
Tom Griswold
Man.
Chick McGee
Roger Ebert was born in the state in 1942.
Christy Lee
No kidding.
Chick McGee
Yeah, he was great. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Famous for the thumbs up, thumbs down. Had to be weird when they review the movie Gladiator.
Josh Arnold
A little confusing.
Chick McGee
People die and they give him a thumbs down. Okay, we're gonna wrap it up right there. Houston, Houston, Houston. Coming up, we have sporting news from Chick McGee and more letters. We have. We do indeed. Every letter. If you want to get a hold of us, Bob and tom@bobandtom.com and this is coming to you from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios, the Bob and Tom Show.
Jessica Alsman
Want to share a letter or comment? Our email is bobandtomobandtom.com sorry.
Christy Lee
Welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. Yes, a blanket apology. Christy Lee at the SILAC insurance news desk. Hi, there's Pat Godwin. Hello, Josh Arnold.
Ace Cosby
Hi there.
Christy Lee
Ace Cosby. We are in The Ohio. Ohio O'Reilly. Ohio and O'Reilly rhymes, kind of.
Chick McGee
No, not even close.
Christy Lee
They begin with an Ohio O'Reilly Auto Parts. Tom and I are from Ohio.
Chick McGee
O's on the end. What is it? Oh, in the end.
Christy Lee
High in the round. On the end.
Chick McGee
Oh, sorry.
Christy Lee
High in the middle.
Chick McGee
That makes much more sense. Now. We just had our feature about the cuddling. I'm a professional cuddler. Yes. I'm telling you, if you take a sign that said free cuddles and stand at a gas station 11:30 on a Saturday night, you're gonna either end up.
Josh Arnold
On a corner station that throws you off. Come on, park during the day.
Ace Cosby
Nice.
Josh Arnold
Park during the day.
Christy Lee
End up on a coroner's table is what he said.
Tom Griswold
What he said.
Chick McGee
I don't buy this. I'm a professional cuddler. Really?
Tom Griswold
That's because you don't like to be touched.
Ace Cosby
Yes. And you're blessed to have people who cuddle you already.
Chick McGee
They get paid in their own way. Well, I'm just saying roof over their.
Josh Arnold
Head, so to speak.
Ace Cosby
For those who lack a physical touch, they and it is necessary you really thrive as a person.
Christy Lee
You embrace that everything is a transaction, don't you?
Chick McGee
Oh, that's because I call it facing reality.
Christy Lee
Okay.
Chick McGee
But I'm made this observation recently. I was talking to the lady who was cutting my hair.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
And I was.
Christy Lee
So what was that, like a 30 second conversation?
Chick McGee
That's right. I don't have a lot of hair.
Christy Lee
We had a complaint letter about your sideburns, by the way.
Chick McGee
Was it from Kelly?
Christy Lee
It could be.
Chick McGee
But in for a woman that's, you know, cutting hair, that's sometimes her clients, that's the only person that touches them.
Tom Griswold
Right.
Chick McGee
And in many cases, I think it's, it's almost you get a relationship going. A certain person that I happen to know that is a haircutting person who you know, also Was asked by one of her clients, when I die, would you please do my hair?
Ace Cosby
Oh, sure.
Chick McGee
And she did.
Ace Cosby
Yeah.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
Which. That just shows how close you can get. But in many cases, people who do things like that, even personal trainers, they have to kind of be sort of like psychologists because it's sort of. They hear people's problems and sometimes it's the only person that touches them. You know, it's kind of serious business.
Tom Griswold
Yeah. I got a win win because my massage therapist went back to school to get her therapy degree. That's important for, I mean, psychological.
Chick McGee
Right.
Tom Griswold
So now I can talk and get massaged at the same time.
Ace Cosby
Oh, you want to talk during yours?
Tom Griswold
Yeah, sometimes.
Chick McGee
And this massage therapist hasn't taken herself out.
Tom Griswold
Know she's been my massage therapist for 30 years.
Josh Arnold
Why she went to school.
Christy Lee
You think. You think I could. You think I could get an appointment with her? This is Chrissy's husband, Andy.
Chick McGee
How's it going? How's it going?
Tom Griswold
I don't think Andy's ever had a massage. We talked about that.
Christy Lee
I don't remember what I've had or hadn't had. Why don't you say everything's a blur?
Chick McGee
You've been getting so many massages your whole life. You know how to do it. Why don't you give them one?
Tom Griswold
I would if he wants one, sure.
Christy Lee
Here's what you do. You cover your oil and you cover your body in oil.
Tom Griswold
Oh, you mean I give him one?
Chick McGee
Yeah, yeah.
Christy Lee
And then crawl all around him like a panther. Really sexy panther.
Tom Griswold
I am not going freak off.
Chick McGee
Part of.
Josh Arnold
Grab his buttocks.
Christy Lee
A lot of baby oil.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Tom Griswold
God, that'd ruin your sheets.
Christy Lee
Oh, here's what you do. Just order a case of baby oil and don't say anything about it. Just shows up at the. Just shows up at the house.
Ace Cosby
A diddy's worth and you could go.
Christy Lee
Hey, hey, hon, can you open that box? I forget what I ordered.
Chick McGee
I believe I haven't read too much about the case, but I believe if you want a diddy's worth, you're gonna need a forklift.
Ace Cosby
Yeah, yeah. There are pallets involved.
Chick McGee
Yeah. It's very, very serious. We have to get involved in the world of sports. We have Chick Magee right over there. I can see him. What's happening?
Christy Lee
The Florida Panthers, Stanley cup champions. They're repeat winners. They beat the Oils last night. Edmonton Oilers, 5 to 1 in Game 6 of the final. They're the NHL's first back to back winners since Tampa Bay in 2020, 21. And the third team to do it this century, Sam Reinhardt, scored four of the five goals. Including the cup clincher. The Panthers have won 11 of 12 playoff series since Matthew Kachak arrived by trade. And Paul Maurice, the funniest coach in the National Hockey League, took over as coach in the summer of 22. Connor McDavid again denied the first title of his career for the oilers in his second consecutive final. Canada's Stanley cup drought has reached 32 years.
Ace Cosby
That really is surprising, right?
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Chick McGee
That's not fair.
Christy Lee
Sam Bennett has won the Con Smythe Trophy as playoff mvp. After the Panthers scored their repeat Stanley cup winner, they knocked Edmonton, Goler goalie Stuart. Stuart Skinner Skitter. They took. Took him out of the game. So it was amazing. How many win for the Panthers.
Chick McGee
How many teams are named the Panthers.
Christy Lee
Carolina and the NFL.
Chick McGee
Yeah, very popular. A lot of. A lot of high schools.
Christy Lee
Florida Panthers.
Chick McGee
Certain political organizations.
Ace Cosby
Sociopolitical.
Chick McGee
Yes, yes.
Ace Cosby
Yeah.
Chick McGee
You know, Eldridge Cleaver, I mean, black.
Christy Lee
Huey Newton, everybody gone from the Black Panthers.
Josh Arnold
Angela Davis might be still alive.
Christy Lee
Are there new. Is it new Black Panther?
Chick McGee
I don't know.
Tom Griswold
I don't know.
Christy Lee
Now, how long can they call themselves the New Black Panthers? Isn't that Federal Trade Commission? Yeah, they ruled on that, right?
Chick McGee
You got your Pink Panther, Christie.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, I just watched that the other night. I hadn't seen the Pink Panther movie in quite a while, though.
Chick McGee
Oh, God, I love some of those.
Tom Griswold
I do, too.
Chick McGee
The scene. The scene where he gets on the parallel bars.
Josh Arnold
Oh, it's all coming back to me now.
Ace Cosby
Y' all so funny.
Josh Arnold
So funny.
Ace Cosby
That's right. I forgot.
Josh Arnold
He says, that coming back to me now.
Ace Cosby
That's one of the greatest psychs, if.
Chick McGee
You haven't seen it. He hops on these parallel bars, does a quick thing, and when he dismounts, he doesn't see that there's a stairwell next to him, and he just completely disappears.
Ace Cosby
Right.
Chick McGee
I'm sure the guy who did that stunt.
Ace Cosby
It's brilliant.
Chick McGee
Probably dead. Oh, God.
Christy Lee
Blake Edwards, a special Oscar. And he came on in a wheelchair and so funny. Crashed.
Ace Cosby
And he comes out in this electric wheelchair and he looks completely addled, and then it goes haywire, shoots across the street, and then just walks out. Fine. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Chick McGee
Well, congratulations to the Florida Panthers.
Christy Lee
Yes.
Chick McGee
Could we. Let's. Let's give it back to Canada. What do you say? Now, the. The Stanley cup is. Has an interesting situation. Christy, I'm sure you're aware of tradition. Yeah. There you go. Each player in the Team is allowed to have it for a certain period of time.
Tom Griswold
Correct.
Chick McGee
But I believe they. Now it's. Now it comes with an escort. Is that correct?
Ace Cosby
I'm not totally sure on that. I've heard yes and I've heard no, so I don't know.
Josh Arnold
Josh, has it been broken before?
Christy Lee
It's been. It got dented not that long ago. Yeah, they dropped it when they were.
Ace Cosby
Because the guys who present it still, they wear the white gloves.
Christy Lee
Right.
Ace Cosby
It's like. Yeah. One week from now, that's gonna be. There's gonna be Heineken or Labats being poured into there.
Christy Lee
God knows what.
Chick McGee
Yeah, yeah. There have been incidents. I know. It's been fished out of the bottom of a pool.
Tom Griswold
Oh, sure.
Chick McGee
Oh, yeah, absolutely.
Tom Griswold
How big is it? It's pretty tall.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Ace Cosby
Yeah, it's big. I forget exactly what the weight is.4.
Christy Lee
And a half feet.
Ace Cosby
But it's heavy, too. When they skate around, that's all adrenaline pretty much. Well, they're also world class athletes, but. Yeah.
Chick McGee
Now, can you name the most famous trophies?
Ace Cosby
Oh, what, like the major sports?
Chick McGee
Yeah, major. What do you think the most famous ones are? The America's Cup, I think the Lombardi.
Josh Arnold
And the Wimbledon, Stanley Cup.
Chick McGee
But the Lombardi came late, though.
Ace Cosby
Well, still. But still, I think more people know that than.
Tom Griswold
Borg Warner, probably Borg Warner.
Chick McGee
For the Indy 500. That's. That's certainly one of the most interesting trophies because it's modified with every winner's face put on it.
Ace Cosby
You count the green jacket. If you. If you show somebody that most people know why you have that.
Tom Griswold
What do they give the golfer to take home?
Ace Cosby
Like, I don't know.
Tom Griswold
Do they give him a.
Christy Lee
No, they give him. They. He can't take the green jacket home.
Tom Griswold
Right, Right.
Christy Lee
He gets a little miniature green jacket.
Ace Cosby
A little green jacket. Koozie.
Chick McGee
With a little. Little puppet.
Christy Lee
He can put his fingers through the armhole.
Chick McGee
I'm Phil Mickelson.
Christy Lee
I'm the big Masters winner.
Josh Arnold
Is there only one green jacket?
Christy Lee
Yeah. One forever.
Tom Griswold
No, no, no, no, no. They get their own.
Chick McGee
But they keep.
Josh Arnold
They can't take it home.
Tom Griswold
No.
Chick McGee
They have a special closet.
Tom Griswold
Closeted.
Christy Lee
They keep them on the. At Augusta.
Ace Cosby
Yeah.
Christy Lee
Can't take them.
Chick McGee
Yeah. I would say the Heisman Trophy. Now, the Heisman Trophy. Does everybody get one to keep?
Christy Lee
I don't know about that.
Tom Griswold
I don't know. Probably a little one.
Chick McGee
I don't know.
Christy Lee
Well, remember, no. O.J. had his Heisman.
Ace Cosby
Yeah.
Christy Lee
Like the actual size.
Chick McGee
Okay. So you get. That's when you get to Keep.
Christy Lee
I think Reggie Bush. I know he got his back, but I. And they might have. Yeah. Just. Here you go. Sorry.
Chick McGee
Any other.
Christy Lee
I think the Stanley cup is the most famous cup ever. I think.
Chick McGee
I would think. I would think America's cup is probably older, right?
Tom Griswold
I don't know what the America's cup looks sailing. It's nothing.
Christy Lee
It's a zero interest.
Tom Griswold
But I don't know what it looks like. What is the America's Cup?
Chick McGee
If it weren't for sailing, none of us would be here.
Tom Griswold
Okay, but what does the American.
Chick McGee
A little bit of a problem with this. Josh knows where I'm. Go ahead, Christy, stop me.
Christy Lee
Hey, I have the dimensions on the Stanley cup and It's. It weighs 35 pounds.
Ace Cosby
Oh, okay. Lighter than I thought. I thought it was closer to 50.
Tom Griswold
And a water softener.
Christy Lee
36 inches tall. I thought it was much taller than that.
Tom Griswold
I did too.
Christy Lee
I. I would guess 5ft tall.
Ace Cosby
It seems massive.
Chick McGee
Well, you. If it was five feet tall, you could. You couldn't pick it up.
Christy Lee
I would guess get. I get it that it's not five feet tall.
Chick McGee
You just said you thought it was five feet tall.
Christy Lee
Yes, I know, and I'm admitting that I was wrong. I was mistaken. But no, you have to hammer it home. How ridiculous thinking that it was five feet is. You bastard.
Chick McGee
It's not a matter of being a bastard. It's a matter of being. Matter of being ignorant.
Christy Lee
In 1892, the original name for the Stanley cup was the Dominion Challenge Cup.
Ace Cosby
So funny.
Christy Lee
And it was a bowl only 7.28 inches tall. In 1924, the trophy changed into the three foot statue. I thought it was five feet. Tom, did you hear?
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Christy Lee
And to allow room for an inscription of each year's championship team. According to the NHL, this was to prevent players from carving their names into the cup themselves, as some had done.
Ace Cosby
They had done. They had to just go, all right, we're just gonna have to do this, all right?
Christy Lee
You bunch of. Canadian.
Ace Cosby
Yeah, yeah.
Christy Lee
Maniac.
Chick McGee
At least I like the cops and the. As opposed to the.
Ace Cosby
Look up the American.
Tom Griswold
I'm looking it up right now.
Christy Lee
I like the Wimbledon plate. I do.
Ace Cosby
I do, too.
Christy Lee
I'm a big.
Chick McGee
That's cool. Don't like the plates.
Tom Griswold
You don't like. What do you mean?
Ace Cosby
It's real nice.
Chick McGee
You can fill the Stanley cup with champagne and drink it. You can't wait. Well, we got. We've got the steak. We got nachos. Past the nachos on the Wimbledon plate.
Tom Griswold
There's A lot going on on this.
Christy Lee
That's the Wimbledon tradition.
Chick McGee
Nachos.
Christy Lee
Nachos. That's right. After you win on the Wimbledon plane.
Chick McGee
Not bangers and mash.
Christy Lee
No.
Chick McGee
Right now the tradition of listening to this program with great audio from Raycon earbuds is continuing. Thank you.
Christy Lee
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Chick McGee
Thank you very much. Yeah.
Tom Griswold
Christy, The America's cup is an ugly trophy.
Ace Cosby
It's big.
Tom Griswold
It's big. It's been added on to because of all the yachts.
Ace Cosby
But and I also, I don't like that it can be sponsored. It's the Louis Vuitton America's Go right now.
Chick McGee
Really good.
Tom Griswold
Big LV on it.
Christy Lee
Tacky.
Chick McGee
Yes. If only it had been something classier. For example, it could be Gucci.
Tom Griswold
It looks like a picture. Have you seen it?
Chick McGee
No. Show it to me. Oh, wow. That is weird.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Ace Cosby
It's huge though.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Ace Cosby
Look at this lady holding it.
Chick McGee
Now. Does anybody else have the jacket thing like the Masters? Well, because I know in the beginning the Masters it was a slightly different color of green and you got a two pairs of pants and reversible vest.
Tom Griswold
Oh, nice.
Chick McGee
Which I thought.
Ace Cosby
Oh, yes. Yeah.
Tom Griswold
You didn't really want an answer. You asked.
Chick McGee
That's not true.
Ace Cosby
The world's masturbatory cup has. All right. The world's mast respiratory contest is a jacket.
Christy Lee
Naturally.
Tom Griswold
Of course.
Chick McGee
There you go.
Christy Lee
Let me tell you something. You meant well.
Chick McGee
Take your. Take your hat and jacket off. No, no, no, no, no. We're going to try to get the jokes in order here in the O'Reilly Auto Part Studios where this remains the Bob and Tom Show.
Christy Lee
Welcome back to the Bob and Tom show. Hello, Josh Arnold.
Tom Griswold
Hello.
Christy Lee
There's Pat Godwin. Christy lee on Chick McGee. Where? The O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. There's Ace Cosby.
Chick McGee
Hey.
Christy Lee
Hello, Tom.
Chick McGee
Go on without me. I'm looking for some.
Christy Lee
All right.
Ace Cosby
I have a letter.
Tom Griswold
All right.
Christy Lee
Here's Josh with a letter.
Ace Cosby
We have. We've been getting some questions regarding our us and maybe our preferences, our lives.
Christy Lee
Minutiae.
Ace Cosby
They're kind of conversation starters, really.
Christy Lee
Details. Right.
Ace Cosby
Well, here's one. This is a question for the men. And, Krista, you'll know why after you hear it.
Tom Griswold
Okay.
Christy Lee
How long is your penises.
Ace Cosby
Oh, no, no. If all of you were stranded on a desert island together, who would be the first to go gay?
Chick McGee
No.
Ace Cosby
I think the reason that Christie's not involved is because the answer would be her. She would look at all of us and go, I'm now a lesbian.
Christy Lee
Everybody stays away from me.
Ace Cosby
Yes.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Ace Cosby
So I don't. I'm gonna guess Godwin.
Tom Griswold
Godwin.
Christy Lee
Why?
Josh Arnold
Because I'm so pretty?
Ace Cosby
Yeah.
Chick McGee
See, There you go. There we go. Signed, sealed, and delivered. Answer over.
Josh Arnold
I would have thought it was you because you're so adventurous of your sexuality and very open.
Christy Lee
Yeah. And you're very about. That's a bundle of nerves.
Josh Arnold
Besides, that's what you told me inside your back door.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Ace Cosby
No, no. We wouldn't have to be stranded on a desert island for me to go gay with any of you. We could be stuck in a traffic jam.
Tom Griswold
I would think it would be Tom, as much as he talks about butts.
Chick McGee
Oh, no, this is. This is a scared straight.
Tom Griswold
Oh, really?
Chick McGee
That's why. Yeah, that's. That's why I'm not in. That's why I don't want to go to prison. That's why. That's why I don't speed.
Ace Cosby
Asa, would you think you would be. No, no.
Josh Arnold
I'm prison gay, but not desert island gay.
Christy Lee
Really?
Tom Griswold
Stay alive in prison. Right.
Chick McGee
But, see, Pat's the only one who's been in jail.
Ace Cosby
In all honesty, I don't think any of us would.
Christy Lee
Desert island gay. Require implies a commitment. You're gonna be there.
Ace Cosby
Yeah. You know, that's why I don't. I think we would all just kind of go our separate.
Tom Griswold
I mean, that'd be a relationship.
Ace Cosby
We'd have a coconut tree.
Christy Lee
We'd have a cave where we would.
Chick McGee
Take care of ourselves.
Ace Cosby
Right, Right. Exactly. I think we would. I think we would invent things and then ship. Like, maybe. Hey, have you. Have you seen what you can do with this with a coconut?
Chick McGee
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely. Tom did a really nice drawing of a big buxom woman in cave number six.
Christy Lee
You guys remember the joke made the hole too big?
Ace Cosby
A guy's plane goes down, and it's. He's got a. You know, it's him and some animals there. It's like some sort of agricultural plane or whatever. And so he gets. Goes down. The only survivors are him and this pig, and they're on the desert island. And he goes, well, after a little bit of time, he goes, that pig's starting to look pretty good. I better see what I can do here. And he goes over. Can't get a hold of the pig to do what he wants to do with it. The pig just throwing a fit, you know, oinking, going crazy. He's like, man, if only I could. He keeps trying night after night to get a hold of this pig. Well, all of a sudden, one morning, this beautiful blonde woman washes up on shore.
Christy Lee
Wow.
Ace Cosby
And he goes, finally. And she's like, hi there. And he goes, look.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Ace Cosby
Could you do me a favor? Could you hold that pig?
Chick McGee
Yeah, that's what happens.
Christy Lee
I really, really appreciate it.
Chick McGee
Yeah, you're. Things really change. Eat too many coconuts. Well, welcome back. This is the Babaton program. Let's move forward here. Are we still doing the sportscast? I forgot.
Tom Griswold
Do pigs run away?
Chick McGee
What do you mean?
Tom Griswold
If they're not fenced in. I drove by on my way home from work the other day, and there was just a pig in the, like, this person's yard, and there was no fence.
Christy Lee
Where the hell do you live?
Chick McGee
She lives in, like, eight counties over, as you know.
Tom Griswold
The pig and the chickens were just right there, like, on. By the road. It was so weird.
Christy Lee
That'll do.
Tom Griswold
Oscar knows what I'm talking about. Exactly what I'm talking.
Ace Cosby
Or maybe they do just stay where they know the food is.
Chick McGee
They're so.
Tom Griswold
I know they're really across a road.
Chick McGee
They're really smart. I wonder if you can. Can you use that dog?
Tom Griswold
Oh, maybe it has an invisible fence.
Chick McGee
I. I don't know that I know that that works for some dogs. Maybe it works for pigs.
Tom Griswold
I don't know.
Chick McGee
They say pigs are really smart.
Tom Griswold
This pig was right there.
Chick McGee
I don't want to know. I don't want to know any more about them because I do enjoy pulled pork. I don't wanna. I don't wan.
Christy Lee
Guilty about bacon.
Chick McGee
Oh, bacon.
Christy Lee
Oh, my God. Holy.
Tom Griswold
I was. I was a little stunned. I thought, what's keeping that Pig in the.
Ace Cosby
I know there's.
Chick McGee
Right up here where that they're putting that new walkway. There's roosters in that guy's yard all the time.
Tom Griswold
Really?
Chick McGee
Yeah. I don't know how. They don't go anywhere.
Tom Griswold
Yeah. The. There's guy. The guy has chickens too. And they don't. They just are right there in the yard. I don't know.
Christy Lee
How do people own roosters? Don't get complaints every morning from their neighbors or the dangling.
Chick McGee
They. They do.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Ace Cosby
No, it's not just the morning. Yeah.
Tom Griswold
Oh, yeah.
Ace Cosby
It's crazy.
Chick McGee
They're confused.
Christy Lee
WNBA. Last night, Caitlin Clark had 20 points, six assists and four three pointers. And the Fever beat the Connecticut sun in Indianapolis 8871. A physical game that got. That got a little chippy at times. Here's some of the highlights here. If you turn up the. There we go.
Tom Griswold
There's a lot of content.
Christy Lee
Jesus got punched in the face. Caitlyn got punched in the face right about. Oh, right about here.
Chick McGee
Boom. She was elbowing her. It's. This is a. This is the best thing to happen to the wnba.
Josh Arnold
It's like a soccer fall.
Ace Cosby
It's rough for Kayla. She's a target, you know.
Christy Lee
Oh, yeah.
Tom Griswold
Later in the game there was a real fight.
Chick McGee
It was getting like WWE action. I went to one of these games over the weekend. It was great. Tremendous presentation. Just really well done. They. It's. And they, of course I mentioned they have a Gatlin gun T shirt cannon. Not to take anything away from that. The action of court was amazing, too, but I'd never seen the Gatlin gun T shirt cannon.
Tom Griswold
You've been to a college game. What do you.
Chick McGee
No.
Tom Griswold
Okay.
Chick McGee
I had not. But it's wonderful. And I'm getting. We are getting a regular. I want a single shot T shirt can. And I put Ms. Hooker on that for our next appearance.
Tom Griswold
Okay. Okay.
Chick McGee
I. I don't know why you're.
Christy Lee
Congratulations. No, I'm. I can't wait to use it. I, I don't know if I'll be checked out on this particular armament, but I, I hope to shoot T shirts.
Chick McGee
Into the crowd so much.
Christy Lee
I can't wait.
Chick McGee
I, I do worry that when they. When they land near the balconies, I, I might get a little concerned that someone's going to be going for it and.
Tom Griswold
Oh, and fall over.
Chick McGee
Fall over the edge. That's been happening a lot at certain other venues.
Christy Lee
Conor McGregor once again making news for the wrong reasons. Throughout the Gregor in altercations. Both professional and private. Over the weekend, he was apparently caught on video punching a man in the face at something called the Ibiza nightclub.
Ace Cosby
And then why is this guy has something wrong with him.
Josh Arnold
I mean, he's got to stay home.
Tom Griswold
Anger management issues.
Ace Cosby
Yeah. At least.
Tom Griswold
Yes.
Christy Lee
He's 36 years old. Struck a man in the Pasha Pacha nightclub on the Spanish party island of Ibiza while drinking on Tuesday morning. The fighter seemed to talking to a man on the club's dance floor before putting his arm around the guy's shoulder from a platform above. And they continue to chat. And then all of a sudden, McGregor punches him in the face. You can see where the circle is right in the back there. You can hear the music.
Tom Griswold
Boom, boom. Oh, man.
Christy Lee
And it does take him two punches. It should be. I think this. The next part is closer up, I believe.
Ace Cosby
But it looks like it's.
Christy Lee
There we go. There we go there they're talking and then. Yeah, I'd like to know what the.
Chick McGee
Guy said to him.
Ace Cosby
Yeah, but don't you sue the hell out of him. Out of McGregor.
Chick McGee
Of course. Yeah.
Ace Cosby
I. I'm at least.
Christy Lee
So.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Christy Lee
So. Yeah.
Chick McGee
But I mean, still like to know what he said.
Ace Cosby
The guy's got brain lesions or something. I'm serious.
Christy Lee
He does have something.
Tom Griswold
Probably right.
Ace Cosby
Yeah.
Chick McGee
The ergo. Don't say call him a pussy. This is why guys like this have to have bodyguards. Because some guy comes up, you're kind of short, but you're not that tough. Boom.
Christy Lee
But you can't fight me.
Chick McGee
Oh.
Christy Lee
Clearly something was said to annoy him and he reacted in a bad way. There you go, Tom. And that sports.
Chick McGee
And. And you're in a nightclub. Everybody's all boozed up. We have a nightclub news coming up. Yeah. If you're just joining us, hello again. These are the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. And this is the Bob and Tom show. And that was the Chick McGee sportscast.
Christy Lee
That's right. Award winning.
Chick McGee
Thank you very much. We're gonna head over that way. Wait a minute. You know, we should do what? Pat's got a new song. A couple of them, actually. Would you mind doing one of the new ones for us? Pat's next project will be coming out soon. Do we have a date on the arrival of the dry bar Pat Godwin comedy Special.
Josh Arnold
We don't. We don't. It's there. It's. It's up to them now.
Chick McGee
They take them four months and the title is now Identity Crisis.
Ace Cosby
Oh, okay. Pat Godwin Identity Crisis.
Chick McGee
Yeah. Okay. And we look forward to seeing it soon.
Tom Griswold
Good.
Ace Cosby
Well, how about we just. Pat will let you know when they.
Chick McGee
Give me a day to help. I was just stalling because he didn't have his guitar.
Christy Lee
I think the bigger question is, what do you think of the title Identity Crisis?
Tom Griswold
I don't. He doesn't like it.
Chick McGee
It's fine.
Josh Arnold
You like Steal My Identity better or Patty G rated? I mean, I.
Chick McGee
Steal My Identity is one of your songs.
Josh Arnold
Yeah, but that's why I.
Chick McGee
Identity Crisis has been used a lot. Personality Crisis. The famous New York Doll song. I'm sorry.
Christy Lee
Famous New York Doll song?
Josh Arnold
Oh, yeah, we can all hum.
Christy Lee
That's an oxymoron. There's no famous New York Doll song. None.
Chick McGee
Zero.
Ace Cosby
I mean, he talks about the Clash not getting radio play.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Ace Cosby
And then he references the famous New York Dolls.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Tom Griswold
All right.
Josh Arnold
Oh, this will work.
Tom Griswold
It will work.
Chick McGee
All right.
Tom Griswold
Good.
Josh Arnold
My son is 14 he may not make it to 15. Has hair under his arms I'm becoming quite mean I remember way back when he was my best friend Such a kind heart Riding within the gold car he never showers now and I have to remind him to brush his teeth as for his unmade bed I'm afraid to look underneath he won't empty the trash can Grunts like a caveman his hair's the messiest I've ever seen I don't like 14. He won't leave the room now Always on his Device says watching YouTube and ordering DoorDash in spite of what the price is he refuses to go to the pool says hanging out with me ain't cool and if that door's locked I better not. Cause my son is 14 I'm an old dad in my 60s I ask him when I'm gone Are you gonna miss me? He mumbles what did you say? With a look that says go away. What's the father to do? Friends tell me I gotta wait till he's nice again at 22 my son is 14.
Chick McGee
Very good. Please knock. Thank you very much. Now, coming up in the news. Give me the teaser, Christie Lee.
Tom Griswold
We have a lot of coffee. News. Ladies and gentlemen, we have Ozzy DNA in the news. News. And what is the sexual thing you would never do again? Something sexual you would not do.
Ace Cosby
Okay.
Christy Lee
Sex with one of the ex wives.
Chick McGee
Do you mean all of them in this room or just yours?
Christy Lee
I think all of them in the room. I would think, yeah.
Chick McGee
Would have been really awkward if you'd said just mine. No, thank you very much. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.
Jessica Alsman
More of the show is on the way. You can find us on X obandtom or you can email us at bob and tomobandtom.com or BIA.
Christy Lee
Welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. It's a show. Josh Arnold, Pat Godwin, Christy Lee, Ace Cosby. I'm Chick mcgee. We're in the o'reilly Auto Parts Studios. Hello, Tom.
Chick McGee
I was thinking about that story you had about Conor McGregor.
Christy Lee
Yeah. Punching a guy in a bar. Yep.
Chick McGee
Isn't that place pronounced Ibiza?
Christy Lee
Is it Ibiza?
Chick McGee
I think.
Christy Lee
I think it's spelled a beast.
Chick McGee
Yeah, but I think. I think I heard someone say Ibiza.
Christy Lee
You know, that's the only fat tongue word I can think of. Maybe, Mrs. Jones, maybe you mean.
Chick McGee
Oh, you. I see. So like, in other words, if. If Z was always pronounced that way, it would be a zebra.
Christy Lee
Instead of a zebra, it would be a zebra.
Chick McGee
You talk like Opie in the Music Man.
Christy Lee
Although the.
Chick McGee
Well, Fargo wagon of a common.
Christy Lee
Remember, he just yelled at us for. I'm not living in the 50s. Remember that? It's zebra, by the way.
Ace Cosby
Oh, yo, you're a zebra, man.
Tom Griswold
I. Oh, really?
Christy Lee
That's why they say now I'm a.
Ace Cosby
Zebra all the time. Unless we're talking about zebra cakes.
Christy Lee
Oh, those are. You know what you do with a zebra cake? You microwave wave it for like 10 seconds.
Tom Griswold
Really?
Ace Cosby
Wow.
Christy Lee
Oh, yeah.
Ace Cosby
That needs to be true.
Christy Lee
Didn't I just blow your cake in mind?
Ace Cosby
No.
Chick McGee
How about the ABCs? Do you end with a ZED or a Z?
Christy Lee
I am. I'll be honest. Making preparations right now. Switch to zed.
Chick McGee
Are you now?
Christy Lee
Yes.
Ace Cosby
Instead of Z, we got a Canuck in our mix.
Christy Lee
Oh, yeah. We say Mitch. Mixed.
Ace Cosby
Yes. Yeah. Not mixed.
Chick McGee
And then are you going to start doing all your temperatures in Celsius?
Christy Lee
Possibly. I'm trying to get the formula in my head.
Chick McGee
Remember the brief romance that American Broadcasting had with Celsius?
Christy Lee
I was right there on the front lines.
Tom Griswold
We tried to teach it in school. All the time on the board.
Chick McGee
Yeah. And the weather. All the weather TV people would. They would be doing both.
Christy Lee
Yes, sir.
Chick McGee
Finally, clear heads prevailed and we realized, this is America. We're doing it our way. Go to hell.
Ace Cosby
I got pretty good at it when I lived in Korea. Korea? Because it was all Celsius and the Canadians I worked with were all Celsius.
Chick McGee
I don't understand Celsius. So if you say it's meaningless, what's 30 degrees Celsius? I have no idea.
Ace Cosby
So hot.
Tom Griswold
That is hot.
Chick McGee
I don't know.
Ace Cosby
Yeah.
Tom Griswold
Oh yeah.
Chick McGee
I refuse to learn. Sorry.
Christy Lee
Now 30 is like 90 Fahrenheit.
Tom Griswold
I think you're right.
Chick McGee
But now they're doing in track. Track and field.
Tom Griswold
Huh?
Christy Lee
Meters.
Tom Griswold
Oh yeah.
Chick McGee
There's no.
Josh Arnold
Oh yeah.
Tom Griswold
That's been like no metric like that forever.
Chick McGee
It shouldn't be. There's no metric mode.
Ace Cosby
Well, you got to keep that.
Chick McGee
Got to keep what? You got to keep up with the commies. That was trying to do. That's what you want to do.
Christy Lee
30 degrees Celsius, 86 degrees Fahrenheit.
Chick McGee
No idea.
Ace Cosby
Can you stop airing my political leaning? I have a letter here. We were talking barbershops yesterday and I, you know, and Alan, one of the guys who does something behind the scenes, I.
Chick McGee
He has the capability of turning off your microphone right now.
Christy Lee
So many.
Ace Cosby
Sorry.
Christy Lee
So many people.
Ace Cosby
He and I were discussing barber shops and how now, except for in like black communities, the barber shop is kind of. It's. We long for the days of going to a barber shop and hanging out.
Tom Griswold
Right.
Ace Cosby
And again, still alive and well.
Chick McGee
Alan's dad was a barber.
Ace Cosby
Yes. Yeah, yeah. And I just, I wish, I kind of wish I could go to a place like that.
Tom Griswold
My ex father in law was a barber and his shop was like that. It was in downtown.
Chick McGee
Did they have.
Christy Lee
First of all, nobody.
Chick McGee
Did they have porno?
Tom Griswold
Oh yeah, he had porn, he had beer.
Christy Lee
Nobody buy tickets there, just a barber.
Ace Cosby
Well, that's what this letter is Yogi writes in. He says, I used to frequent Sam's barber shop as a very young boy. My mom would give me 30 cents for a haircut and occasionally Sam the barber would give him back a nickel that he could go spend at the store next door.
Tom Griswold
That's very sweet.
Ace Cosby
Well, we were walking by one afternoon and I commented, oh, it looks like Sam is closed. My mother said he would be out for 10 to 15. I said minutes. She said years. Apparently the feds arrested Sam for selling stolen guns in his store. I never saw him again.
Josh Arnold
I'm glad it went that way, man.
Chick McGee
Wow.
Ace Cosby
He was a guy.
Chick McGee
Yeah. I.
Tom Griswold
You get anything at a barbershop?
Chick McGee
And there was back in the day and I guess there are some of these out there now. I mentioned this the other day. They have that array of hair ties. It looks like you're walking into a high quality bar that has 15 bourbons, scotches, gins, etc and the different colors, the beautiful bottles. They would have 30 things of hair tonic. I never used any. I Don't know. I don't know who did, but I'm gonna ask.
Ace Cosby
Have to ask my mom.
Chick McGee
Weird.
Ace Cosby
Who? Glenn, my dad's barber, who he was, because we would go there, my dad would get a haircut, and then we'd hang out. And I wonder if Glenn was an old Vietnam guy or.
Chick McGee
Huh.
Ace Cosby
But man, did he.
Chick McGee
Did he take bets. Was it. I don't know, was it a bookie joint?
Ace Cosby
All I know is I loved going there. I loved the smell, I loved the. That these old guys were hanging out.
Christy Lee
And it sounds.
Ace Cosby
I love playing with the cigarette machine.
Christy Lee
He brand guns, Tom. That's what he did.
Ace Cosby
But that's the thing. I gotta find out what else Glenn was up to.
Tom Griswold
Roy Wood Jr. Has a great story about his dad and about the barber shops, and it's very worth.
Ace Cosby
Black culture.
Tom Griswold
Oh, yeah. It's worth looking up still to this day.
Ace Cosby
Yeah, I love it.
Chick McGee
Do you go to a salon now, Josh?
Christy Lee
No.
Chick McGee
Are you cutting your own?
Ace Cosby
Occasionally I'll cut my own, but I just go to a franchise.
Chick McGee
Okay, you got the.
Ace Cosby
I'm easy.
Chick McGee
It's sit in. The one where it's like you're on a horsey.
Ace Cosby
A horsey?
Tom Griswold
Yeah, for the kids.
Ace Cosby
Oh, I haven't even seen that.
Chick McGee
You get to sit in the horse. And they play cartoon cartoons.
Ace Cosby
I love that.
Christy Lee
I don't know if they have those or do they. Are those. They've gotta still be out there.
Chick McGee
Oh, yeah.
Ace Cosby
Wow. I've never seen that. I. Yeah.
Tom Griswold
Okay, I gotta admit this. When I get my hair done, when they wash it, you know the shampoo bowl that you have to put your head in? I have to sit in a booster seat because my head will be too short to reach.
Chick McGee
Some guy just got so turned on. Christy with her head back in a booster seat.
Christy Lee
You don't understand it. She's the size of a toddler.
Chick McGee
If you. If you put on these saddle shoes, I'll give a you $100.
Ace Cosby
Those head washing bowls.
Tom Griswold
Yes.
Ace Cosby
I. I've never had a problem, but every time I go, the water's going down my back.
Tom Griswold
Oh, really?
Ace Cosby
Yeah. Are you like, I. Every time I'm paranoid that it's gonna. It's not. It's gonna mess me.
Chick McGee
Is anybody rich enough to have one of those at their house?
Tom Griswold
Oh, yeah.
Ace Cosby
Did you ever see the movie about a boy with you, Grant?
Chick McGee
Sure.
Ace Cosby
Yeah, Every day. He went to one of those places and got his hair styled and.
Christy Lee
Really?
Ace Cosby
Yes, because he was living off the royalties of One Christmas Carol.
Tom Griswold
Oh, yeah.
Chick McGee
Hugh Grant and Paddington 2 should have gotten the Academy Award. Highly recommended. Paddington 3 you can pass on. Sorry.
Tom Griswold
Oh, you didn't care for it?
Chick McGee
It's. No, it's not as good. So much for today's movie review. We have Christy Lee across the way. She's at the Silac Insurance news desk.
Tom Griswold
From the files of Reddit comes this question. What is something sexual you'll never do again?
Ace Cosby
Huh?
Tom Griswold
You have an answer?
Chick McGee
Well, does Reddit give you any?
Tom Griswold
Well, sure, we have top responses. But I just wonder. Josh gave me that look like.
Chick McGee
No.
Ace Cosby
I mean, there are things that I don't need to have.
Christy Lee
Nothing. There's nothing that pops to mind.
Ace Cosby
But there was nothing I ever went. I'm never.
Chick McGee
Didn't you say you once called a girl mommy?
Ace Cosby
I didn't. Comedically, it's. It's good.
Christy Lee
You once called a girl mommy.
Tom Griswold
Here's some of the top responses.
Chick McGee
I didn't want to say it, so I just pretended that Josh had. Yeah, comedically, but a really mean thing to do.
Tom Griswold
Put my male member in a hot dog bun and taking a photo for sexting purposes.
Ace Cosby
Why would he never do that again? It's hilarious.
Tom Griswold
Because hot dog buns are actually pretty long. Josh.
Josh Arnold
Oh, she didn't kind of match. You didn't really measure up.
Ace Cosby
That's funny.
Christy Lee
Oh, that is.
Tom Griswold
You should have. What he should have done is worn the. Yeah, yeah. Cut the bun. No, but you can't. Yeah, you go.
Josh Arnold
You put the tip back on.
Ace Cosby
You know what? I'm gonna try. I feel like I could fill a hot dog bun.
Tom Griswold
Really? Sure.
Josh Arnold
Angry.
Ace Cosby
Oh, angry for sure.
Chick McGee
Now we're talking about. Not the weenie winks. We're talking about your average.
Ace Cosby
No, I would have to be.
Christy Lee
You have to cut the middle of it, then take a section out, then.
Chick McGee
Put it together, then hold the packet that says foot long. Yeah.
Ace Cosby
Yeah.
Chick McGee
Because there's no perspective.
Ace Cosby
I'm not feeling a foot long bun, but I'm. I think I'm filling a regular bun. Is that bragging?
Chick McGee
I.
Ace Cosby
No, I don't think it is.
Christy Lee
Well, let me tell you something. I'd like to see that.
Ace Cosby
I will do it.
Chick McGee
I would prefer not seeing it.
Ace Cosby
I'll do it and I won't show you, but I'll let you know. And I'll, you know, I'll be honest.
Chick McGee
What are you gonna do with the bun after you're done?
Christy Lee
Fair enough.
Ace Cosby
Eat it.
Chick McGee
Now, are you gonna eat it or are you gonna slip it in? You know, some young ladies after she's eaten it? You're gonna show her the picture, by the way. You know, I'll probably just, I'll just.
Ace Cosby
Throw it in the trash can at the ballpark.
Christy Lee
You know, it's also going to be on that hot dog, Josh. So some of your quack, you know.
Chick McGee
Okay, I want to revisit this topic in just a few minutes. Thank you very much. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.
Jessica Alsman
Got a comment to share? Text us at 888-262-8661. This is the Bob and Tom Show.
Christy Lee
O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Solid comedy. I'm Chick. Hello, Tom.
Chick McGee
Hello, Chuck McGee.
Christy Lee
Yes, sir.
Chick McGee
Now, we were delving into a topic from Reddit.
Christy Lee
You don't seem to tell me.
Tom Griswold
Did you say that with more disdain?
Christy Lee
Tell me you hate this source without telling me you hate this.
Chick McGee
No, I, I do. I enjoy this particular.
Christy Lee
Yes, I enjoy it a lot. It's Reddit.
Tom Griswold
The question was the.
Chick McGee
The place where no one needs credentials. And the truth is.
Tom Griswold
He'S right about that.
Christy Lee
Real names are optional.
Chick McGee
Yeah, I love the names people pick.
Tom Griswold
The question posed was, what is something sexual you'll never do again? And some of the top responses, if you're just joining us, one that we discussed was a gentleman put his male member in a hot dog bun, took a photo for sexting purposes, but apparently found out that hot dog buns are actually pretty long. Now we found out.
Chick McGee
This is very interesting. Now, judge, you're, you're, you say you would do this.
Ace Cosby
I feel like I could go, I could fill a hot dog bun.
Tom Griswold
And on the average, I looked it up during the break. The average hot dog bun is 6 inches in length.
Ace Cosby
Now, now this is definitely. I could not do it.
Tom Griswold
Growing. Not.
Ace Cosby
Yes.
Tom Griswold
I mean, show.
Ace Cosby
You guys know I'm def. I'm a grower.
Tom Griswold
Yeah. Not a shower.
Ace Cosby
Yeah.
Chick McGee
Yeah. When you say you guys know, it's.
Ace Cosby
Because I tell you.
Chick McGee
Yes. None of us have ever. Have ever witnessed it.
Christy Lee
Well, speak for yourself.
Chick McGee
Now, did you see, did you see Growth Mode? Or, or not angry.
Christy Lee
I'm not going to tell you, but I'll just say you got to start from somewhere.
Ace Cosby
Yeah.
Chick McGee
So now, presumably this guy thought it'd be funny to send his friend a photograph of the.
Ace Cosby
Now, do you put a line of mustard?
Chick McGee
Yeah, yeah. That was exactly. I was going to ask. I just don't know. Mayonnaise.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Ace Cosby
If you're from Chicago, you don't put ketchup.
Chick McGee
Yeah. Yeah. By the way, mayonnaise. Mayonnaise on hot dogs. Disgusting.
Tom Griswold
Yes.
Christy Lee
Yeah, yeah. Why? I tried mayonnaise. Mayonnaise on.
Ace Cosby
I only tried it. My brother Joe insists on grilling the hot dog bun, putting a little bit of mayonnaise and grilling the bun there.
Chick McGee
I bet that's fantastic.
Ace Cosby
It was, it was almost the same and he was so disappointed in our lack of reaction.
Chick McGee
Oh, I bet it sounds good. Grilling the buns is, is a great idea.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Chick McGee
I'm going to say a little bit of crispness on the edge.
Christy Lee
Almost key.
Chick McGee
Yeah. Now, so. And I, I know the old, old stand up joke is. What is it? There's six hot. Eight hot dogs in a pack and six in the bun. What? Is that still a thing?
Tom Griswold
I don't know, actually.
Chick McGee
Didn't someone come out with a matching set of buns for the.
Ace Cosby
You'd think they would.
Tom Griswold
You would think.
Chick McGee
But would you do that, Pat?
Josh Arnold
Do what?
Chick McGee
Do you ever do the comically the. The potentially amusing so called dick pick?
Josh Arnold
Oh, no, no, I wouldn't do that.
Chick McGee
No, no, no. Really?
Ace Cosby
Even. Even if requested?
Josh Arnold
Yes, even if requested. I wouldn't do it.
Chick McGee
No. Oh, depends.
Josh Arnold
I know what I wouldn't do sexually, though. I could tell you that.
Tom Griswold
What?
Josh Arnold
I wouldn't do the car again. That I had a situation where the. We were in the car and it went up on the median and we got stuck there and.
Tom Griswold
Oh, while you were driving.
Josh Arnold
Accident. Yeah. So I wouldn't do that.
Chick McGee
What?
Tom Griswold
Okay.
Ace Cosby
Was it intercourse?
Josh Arnold
It was. It was a mounting. While I was driving.
Tom Griswold
He was sitting on your lap.
Chick McGee
Was this. This century or was it this is. Are we going back?
Josh Arnold
We're going way back.
Chick McGee
Okay. I hope so.
Tom Griswold
But did you hear he wrecked and he stuck on the media.
Christy Lee
You drove up on the media?
Josh Arnold
Yeah, Dallas, Pennsylvania.
Christy Lee
But I see you doing that anyway.
Josh Arnold
Oh, absolutely. Well, you see the way I park. I know you think I make love and drive.
Christy Lee
I think Tom's a menace driving, but I think. Yeah, you're right up there.
Tom Griswold
Yeah. Having sex while you're driving is another. Not really a good idea.
Josh Arnold
Oh, it's a great idea.
Tom Griswold
Depends on what activity.
Josh Arnold
That's the activity I wouldn't do again was cowgirl.
Christy Lee
If she'd want to. No, no, no. If whoever.
Ace Cosby
I reverse cowgirl.
Christy Lee
Oh, right.
Ace Cosby
Yeah.
Josh Arnold
Yes.
Christy Lee
If the partner wants to talk to the gear shift.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, that's okay.
Chick McGee
I see what else is on the Reddit list.
Tom Griswold
Dice, hot peppers. Not thoroughly wash my hands and then pleasure myself within a couple of hours.
Ace Cosby
Okay, that must be.
Chick McGee
Okay, that goes, goes. That goes with this one. Not washing my Hands after pulling weeds.
Tom Griswold
Oh, did you get poison ivy?
Chick McGee
This is. Someone sent me this. Yeah. Oh, that's. That's a bad idea.
Tom Griswold
What do these involve men. Isn't that funny? Ah, put my junk in a vacuum.
Ace Cosby
Oh, gosh. Now these are. We're really beyond the.
Christy Lee
What?
Josh Arnold
Yeah, we're not.
Tom Griswold
This is probably make a sex video. My ex and I did that and we couldn't watch it.
Chick McGee
It.
Tom Griswold
The sounds and just looking at it. Oh, gosh, no. Never ever again.
Ace Cosby
I agree. I did the same thing.
Tom Griswold
I couldn't do that. No way.
Ace Cosby
And I. I went, oh, no. I don't like the noises I'm making.
Josh Arnold
Nothing about it.
Tom Griswold
Critiquing yourself.
Ace Cosby
Yeah.
Chick McGee
I can't hear what she's saying because.
Ace Cosby
Of the ball gag.
Christy Lee
A lot of. A lot of grunting.
Ace Cosby
No, it was my talk. It was more me going.
Christy Lee
I know you're not going to answer this, Tom, but if you notice in. We both kind of have sort of a hearing loss.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Christy Lee
Do you ever any mumbling during sex and you have to go. I'm sorry. What?
Chick McGee
What?
Christy Lee
What did you say? I'm sorry.
Chick McGee
I said you.
Christy Lee
What is it?
Ace Cosby
I don't need my toes sucked ever again. Now. I. It's not something I hated, but I just don't need it done.
Christy Lee
I don't need it done either, but the effort would be nice, right? Come on. That's nice.
Ace Cosby
No, I'm not opposed to sucking on toes, but I just don't need mine.
Chick McGee
I am opposed to both.
Ace Cosby
Well, you're missing out.
Christy Lee
Well, I know we. You like. Straight ahead, baby. Making sex. We know.
Chick McGee
Here's a guy said I took a Viagra and used a C ring at the same time.
Ace Cosby
Oh, geez.
Tom Griswold
They get stuck.
Chick McGee
Ended up in the error, huh? Okay, great.
Tom Griswold
Here's one. Whipped cream. Seems like a fun thing until you realize you're smelling warm milk for the rest of the session, if you will. He says for a mustache.
Christy Lee
I like the way he refers to it as a session.
Chick McGee
Yeah. There's one for you, Josh. I. I don't want to expand on this much, but it just says, put it this way, from now on, I'll handle the finger work. It's from a guy.
Tom Griswold
What?
Ace Cosby
I wonder what that means.
Tom Griswold
What does that mean?
Chick McGee
I think maybe she used some. Yeah, she must have been in places he didn't want. Okay. That.
Christy Lee
Handle the finger work.
Chick McGee
That's what it says. I. You'll have to elaborate. This sort of thing will be explored later. Today we'll be talking with comedian Ally Breen.
Tom Griswold
Oh. I was like, what. What do you got planned today?
Chick McGee
A little show that. Little show that we call sexy time.
Tom Griswold
So is there something you. You said car. You said this toe thing.
Ace Cosby
Yeah.
Tom Griswold
I would say sex on the beach is not what.
Chick McGee
But it's cracked up.
Ace Cosby
That's very good. Very good, man.
Tom Griswold
Sand gets in places and.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Tom Griswold
It's hard to get up.
Chick McGee
You say cracked up to be?
Tom Griswold
I'd say, yeah.
Christy Lee
Sex and water is real, real hard.
Tom Griswold
I agree. Yeah.
Ace Cosby
It's friction.
Tom Griswold
Hot tubs. Dries you out.
Ace Cosby
Although if you. If you ever get the chance to complete in water.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Ace Cosby
It's a watch play. It's. It's.
Josh Arnold
It's like Fantasia.
Ace Cosby
It's unbelievable. It comes out in a smoky sort of ghost like fashion. I swear.
Chick McGee
Were you wearing face mask?
Ace Cosby
No. You could just look. I was in a pool and you guys look. It was.
Chick McGee
I hope it was during Adult Swim.
Josh Arnold
No wonder you got kicked out of your neighborhood.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Christy Lee
Tom, tell him.
Chick McGee
You weren't on the diving board, were you?
Christy Lee
Is it jellyfish? Like one could say.
Ace Cosby
Yeah, it's smoky. It looks like. I don't know. Yeah, smoky. It's really interesting. You've seen it?
Josh Arnold
Yeah, I have seen it.
Chick McGee
Up close.
Ace Cosby
Yeah.
Christy Lee
Up close, yeah.
Chick McGee
Really? The Ramrod. The Ramrod Lounge at swim.
Josh Arnold
No, we just left there.
Ace Cosby
We were both like, whoa, look at that.
Christy Lee
Is that right?
Ace Cosby
Yeah, it's a show.
Chick McGee
Where I gonna switch gears here.
Christy Lee
Get rid of Josh.
Chick McGee
We have Christy, Leah, she's at the SILAC Insurance news desk. What else is going on in the.
Ace Cosby
World of news real quick? By smoke, I mean when you blow out a match. The way that, that and that kind of. Yeah, the way that looks. Yeah.
Tom Griswold
Physicists have calculated the optimal amount of time to dip an Oreo in milk.
Chick McGee
Oh, this is actually more interesting than I thought it would be.
Ace Cosby
It would ever be.
Christy Lee
Can't be as dull as I think it's going to be. No, no, no.
Chick McGee
I think they make a really good point. And it's written, I think. Hope the rewrite here is clear enough. It's very. The original of this is so complicated.
Christy Lee
I too hope it's clit enough.
Chick McGee
That's the previous story.
Tom Griswold
Members of Utah State University's Splash Lab dipped cookies halfway in 2% milk for half to. Half a second to seven seconds before measuring how much milk the Oreos absorbed. Oreos absorbed 50% of their potential liquid weight in just one second. After two, they absorbed 80% before maxing out at four seconds and breaking down five.
Ace Cosby
You're gonna lose the integrity.
Tom Griswold
Ultimately, three seconds was found to be enough time to saturate most of your Oreo cookie. And your choice of milk could change the optimal dunk time by a few split seconds.
Ace Cosby
What?
Chick McGee
What?
Tom Griswold
Well, if it's heavier milk, I would think whole milk, skim milk.
Ace Cosby
I see.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
And in addition to the absorption time, the fat enhances flavor. Right. So if you use whole milk, you're getting that great creamy taste. If you're using, you know, whatever, almond.
Tom Griswold
Milk, some fake milk.
Chick McGee
Yeah, but. So the answer to the question is three seconds.
Tom Griswold
Yes.
Chick McGee
Now I did a little bit of research on this. This is another fun fact. Apparently the best way to dunk an Oreo is to stick a fork into the cream filling so you can submerge it fully.
Tom Griswold
Oh, I see what you're saying.
Chick McGee
Otherwise you're either going to get your fingers wet or. Now do you think, is that, is that too much?
Ace Cosby
Yes, because I don't mind the little bit of. I don't get my fingers wet, but obviously I have a little bit of dry Oreo. I like that crunch mixed with the, the soggy part.
Tom Griswold
Now I've never dunked an Oreo.
Ace Cosby
Well, it's amazing.
Chick McGee
Why don't you join us? We're here in America and go back to Latvia and eat your dried Oreo with your life.
Tom Griswold
I'm not a milk.
Ace Cosby
Now do they dry Hydrox, does that have the same absorption?
Tom Griswold
I don't know. Well, the cookie would be a different cookie.
Chick McGee
So in the whole hydroxy. That's. It's a really complicated story. Are they cheaper? Is that a cheaper Hydrox? I think was the first one Absol. It's some Kansas City company or something.
Christy Lee
Is that right?
Chick McGee
I suffered through like a 45 minute lecture on this one.
Christy Lee
Really? You touched a nerve with the Hydrox people.
Chick McGee
I don't know what happened. They're still out there, right? The Hydrox cookie.
Tom Griswold
So yeah.
Ace Cosby
Boy, they're so. How sad. Can you imagine being the CEO of a company that often people ask, are they still out there?
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
I hope they're doing well. And I don't know if you did the dunk test with the Hydrox, if the results would be any different. We can certainly look into that.
Ace Cosby
I haven't had an Oreo in a while. It's time.
Tom Griswold
I like the blonde Oreos.
Christy Lee
Those aren't Oreos.
Ace Cosby
They're fine.
Christy Lee
Those are not. No, they're not.
Josh Arnold
Oh no.
Tom Griswold
They say Oreo on the package.
Christy Lee
So totally different. Cookie Oreos are the white cream and the chocolate outer shell.
Chick McGee
That's it?
Christy Lee
No. Bacon and s' mores.
Tom Griswold
No, I don't like the flavored ones.
Ace Cosby
You know, they consider them a sandwich. Isn't that interesting? It says, it says so on the package.
Christy Lee
Cream sandwich. Yes, they do. Yeah.
Ace Cosby
Oh, well, it certainly isn't a sandwich.
Chick McGee
Do you like them thrown into a milkshake?
Ace Cosby
Yeah, man.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Christy Lee
You get, you get, you get Oreo cookie ice cream and a pack of Oreo cookies and you get your diet. You get your couple scoops out and crumble some Oreo.
Ace Cosby
I appreciate that. I've never done it.
Christy Lee
Oh, treat yourself.
Chick McGee
Now, we want to say hello to our friends at the Java House. We've got some interesting stuff going on at Java House. My new favorite, by the way, is not the coffee. I've been switching up and doing a lot of hydration drinks in the morning after doing my one coffee. And right now I'm actually doing an iced tea. But the hydration drinks. Fantastic. Also lattes, et cetera, et cetera. What I'm talking about is the Java House. The idea of Java House, the concept, if you will, is peel and pour. Getting rid of the clunky machinery and making it a lot easier in the coffee room at home, the coffee room at work, even while you're traveling. This portion of the Baba Tom show is sponsored by Java House. The peel and pour. Podge. You can have that cup of amazingly smooth, smooth. Did I say smooth?
Tom Griswold
You did.
Christy Lee
You said smooth.
Chick McGee
Smooth.
Christy Lee
Smooth.
Chick McGee
It is. Smooth. A barista quality coffee. In just seconds, you pick your favorite, you peel back the top, pour it into a cup of hot or cold water. That's it.
Tom Griswold
Yep.
Chick McGee
Now, as I mentioned, coffee, of course, teas, which I'm drinking now, they also do lattes, energy drinks, hydration drinks. I just had one of the blue ones. It's the Arctic beverage. Delightful.
Tom Griswold
Arctic freeze.
Chick McGee
It's great. So what's your favorite, John? Josh? The hot chocolate. Okay, there is the hot chocolate and Josh is a little embarrassed because we keep pounding it into him.
Christy Lee
Try to tell him many, many times.
Chick McGee
Perhaps the hot cocoa with an Oreo would be the way to go. Time to break up with your brewer. Get started, Java House.com. use the promo code Bob and Tom and get 25% off your order. I'll say it again, use that promo code Bob and Tom. Get 25% off your order. Find out what I'm talking about. The Java House website. Also find out about that free office demo, javahouse.com, the promo code bobandtom. One big long word to get 25% off your online order. Join the Java House Club with us. We certainly appreciate it. Coming up, we have more things in the news. An interesting set of speaking of coffee about coffee in your health and it's all positive news except for one weird aspect of it, courtesy of the Goop people. You'll see what I'm talking about in a second. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.
Christy Lee
Welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. Pat Godwin, Chrissy Lee, Josh Arnold, Ace Cosby. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Thank O'Reilly for all your car care needs. Get the parts and service you need fast from the professional parts people at O'Reilly Auto Parts. I'm Chick. Hello, Tom.
Chick McGee
Hello. Chick Magee. We just heard from the so called Splash Lab at Utah State University did an interesting study about the proper time to dunk an Oreo if you missed it. Three seconds is the answer, right?
Christy Lee
Utah State, huh?
Chick McGee
An interesting study. If you go more than five seconds, you're oversaturating the Oreo and then it.
Tom Griswold
Starts to crumble and then you get crumbs in your milk.
Chick McGee
Are you a fan of the Blizzard? I certainly am, sure. The Oreo Blizzard, of course. Yeah. Truly, truly delightful. One of the triumphs of Western civilization, I think. Great to be an American and be able to go to a Dairy Queen. That's all I'm saying. Now we have Christy Lee, as you can hear over there, over there being the SILAC insurance news desk. And we were talking about Java house coffee, which I am currently drinking tea. But we have a bunch of, a bunch of coffee news today, all of it good news.
Tom Griswold
I think new research links drinking black coffee to a lower risk of death. Researchers at Tufts University discovered drinking one to two cups of caffeinated coffee every day was linked to a lower risk of death from all causes and of course death from cardiovascular disease as well as, well, black coffee as well as coffee with low levels of added sugar and saturated fat were associated with a 14% lower risk of all cause mortality as compared to no coffee consumption.
Chick McGee
Pat, this is not Irish coffee. Oh, okay.
Ace Cosby
I drink black coffee.
Tom Griswold
I do too.
Ace Cosby
So what's the percentage?
Tom Griswold
It doesn't say for black coffee.
Chick McGee
Oh, all right. But it's overall, it's a, it's a.
Tom Griswold
Higher black coffee is the best way.
Ace Cosby
Yeah.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Ace Cosby
Now I wonder if three cups is okay because it says one to two.
Tom Griswold
It says at two to three cups per day, the link rose to 17%.
Chick McGee
Oh, so what I take out of this is if you drink black coffee, it's okay to have a cigarette with it.
Ace Cosby
I think that's right.
Chick McGee
It offsets the. No, I'm just kidding.
Ace Cosby
I like to dunk my cigarettes.
Christy Lee
Oh, how about that great squeeze song, Black Coffee in Bed?
Ace Cosby
I love that song.
Chick McGee
Is. Is this. Is it the caffeine, or is it the fact that people who are up in the morning drinking coffee are more active?
Ace Cosby
In this case, it sounds like it's just the coffee.
Chick McGee
So if you. If you do, don't get any exercise, never walk anywhere, and you're 50 pounds overweight.
Ace Cosby
I don't know about that. I mean, I.
Christy Lee
Calm down. People are overweight.
Chick McGee
No, no, I'm just saying. Is. Is it.
Christy Lee
Is the fact you want to yell at somebody. Imaginary person. Get off your ass, Humphrey, and get some exercise. Don't you? I can feel it.
Ace Cosby
I love black coffee.
Tom Griswold
I'm with you.
Christy Lee
I like my coffee to taste like a milkshake.
Chick McGee
Yeah. Yeah, that is tasty.
Christy Lee
Oh, yeah, but.
Chick McGee
Well, it's good to know, but that's. That's some nice, happy coffee news.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, but you got to be careful how much sugar and saturated fat you put.
Chick McGee
Ignored that part of the article.
Tom Griswold
I know you did.
Ace Cosby
Yeah, he did. So much so, you didn't even put in the statistic for regular.
Christy Lee
Some say it's editing, some say censoring.
Chick McGee
I wanted people to feel good about their coffee. Now, Pat, you got your guitar. Do we have a coffee song?
Josh Arnold
You know how I like my coffee. I like my coffee like I like my women.
Christy Lee
Yeah, he does.
Josh Arnold
Full of Irish whiskey. I like my coffee, coffee like marriage in the 50s. Black and white and misogynistic. I like coffee and women to be uncomplicated. Oh, room for cream, of course. Oh, don't give me soy, almond or milk, baby. Oh, that's grounds for a divorce. Oh, I don't like coffee like certain women. Cold, spoiled, and bitter. That Cuban hot stuff was too much for my heart. Oh, I loved her a latte, but.
Christy Lee
I had to quit.
Chick McGee
Quitter.
Josh Arnold
I like my coffee and women to agree with me, not give me an ulcer with their acidity. Oh, I'm running out of metaphors and similes. I'll just say I like my coffee like I like my women with big tips. Oh, yes, big tips for all my beautiful.
Chick McGee
Okay, here's another. A similar article I just found. Christy.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
Headline Drinking Coffee Linked with Healthy Aging in women. Researchers followed 50,000 women over 30. Blah, blah, blah. Healthy aging was defined as reaching the age of 70 without major chronic illness or cognitive decline.
Ace Cosby
Are the women supposed to drink it or inject it into their vagina?
Chick McGee
Well, let me keep reading. It's women who typically consumed. Oh, well, now we're getting into 315 milligrams. I don't know what that means. Means of caffeine daily. Oh, the equivalent of three cups of coffee.
Ace Cosby
It's always three. I love it.
Chick McGee
Is each additional daily cup up to two and a half was linked to a modest increase in the likelihood of healthy aging.
Tom Griswold
I drink two every day. Maybe I should up that to three.
Chick McGee
So I think in your case it's.
Tom Griswold
And only one on the weekends, which is weird.
Ace Cosby
That is weird.
Chick McGee
Very weird.
Tom Griswold
Weird.
Christy Lee
Weird. So weird.
Chick McGee
But now I grabbed this other article for you, Christian Christie that I thought was interesting about something you should not do with your coffee.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Tom Griswold
Goop is back in the news. That Gwyneth Paltrow, wonderful website.
Ace Cosby
They do good work.
Tom Griswold
They promoted one $35 coffee enema kit and their so called detox guide recently.
Chick McGee
Sure.
Tom Griswold
The device sold by Implant O Rama llc.
Ace Cosby
Oh, they sound on the up and up.
Tom Griswold
Uses a glass bottle and silicone tubes to deliver coffee into the cola. The company claims benefits like relief from pain, depression and allergies. However, depression experts warn there's no proven health benefit and serious risks exist including infection, burns, sepsis and even death from electrolyte imbalance.
Ace Cosby
Plus your butt will have coffee breath.
Chick McGee
And if you don't use the decaf, your ass will be up all night.
Tom Griswold
But seriously, a 1997 editorial in the Journal of Clinical Gastroenteronology called such treatment treatments rather well. I was so worried about getting through gastroenterolonology or whatever. Quackery and a triumph of ignorance over science. Don't do a coffee enema.
Chick McGee
Filling it to the rim with brim. We have a. A brim job. I guess that would be called. Remember the. This would be a great. With that commercial. He never has a second enema at home.
Tom Griswold
Brim was a coffee, in case you didn't know. Ah, yeah.
Chick McGee
Oh, you didn't know that the fill it to the rim with brim was.
Tom Griswold
There every commercial very long time.
Chick McGee
People don't know that.
Christy Lee
I'm gonna say 70 years ago, 60 years ago.
Ace Cosby
No, I mean. So that's what like Mitchum drank.
Josh Arnold
Yeah, absolutely.
Chick McGee
I think Charlie Chaplin. There's pictures of Charlie Chaplin drinking the brim. So they're saying that the coffee enema. What was it? A triumph of stupidity of some sort?
Tom Griswold
Don't do that.
Chick McGee
That ignorance over Science. Yeah. That's crazy. And presumably, obviously you don't want the coffee too hot.
Tom Griswold
No, Tom.
Chick McGee
Or too cold, I'm assuming.
Ace Cosby
Or as the joke goes, too sweet.
Chick McGee
Yeah. Well, we have, we have a tribute to the coffee enema. It's from the Bob and Tom Band and Orchestra. You know, here in Paris and everywhere I go today, people are talking about the latest development in personal hygiene, the coffee enema. And for those of us who practice the alternative lifestyle, there's only one brand of coffee enema. It's called La Cage Folgers. Bonjour. I am Maurice Chevalier. La Cage a Folger. Because when you're pooped, nothing perks you up like a coffee enema. I'm a gentleman who lives in gay Paris. I like to stay as fresh as I can be. But when I need a little pick me up, I don't take my coffee for from the coffee cup. Hit it girls. When it comes to taste, perhaps your tongue cannot tell the difference, but your can can. But you don't need a coffee cup. Just grabs it back and bottoms up.
Ace Cosby
For the man who likes his coffee in the can.
Chick McGee
Thank you very much. If you listen to that carefully, you can hear echoes of the theme to Deliverance played. Played on the fiddle by, by a distinguished member of a certain symphony orchestra, I'm sure a very rare gig. Hey, can you work the Deliverance theme into that little section right there? Hello again. If you're just joining us, this is the Bob and Tom show coming to you from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studio. We're looking at the lady with long bangs today. She is Christy Lee and she is at the Silac Insurance news desk. What's happening?
Tom Griswold
Young partygoers in Singapore are trading pints for pour overs as a new wave of alcohol free daytime dance events are gaining popularity. That's right, it's a coffee shop club. The recent gathering called Beans and Beets in the city's fashionable Duxton district.
Christy Lee
Oh yeah.
Tom Griswold
Man finds baristas churning out specialty coffee while DJs are spinning back to back sets. Crowds packed the venue by 4pm dancing shoulder to shoulder beneath a disco ball to a mix of TikTok fueled pop and electronic music. Baristas, not bartenders, kept the energy high serving craft coffee while DJs delivered the music. Though no alcohol was served, the crowd moved with enthusiasm. Part of a growing trend among gen zers to embrace social events without the buzz. Well, you get a buzz, it's just caffeine related.
Chick McGee
Do you get woodwork here with during the day. Like a 4 o' clock live dance club.
Ace Cosby
Apparently it's work. Oh, here, boy.
Chick McGee
Maybe.
Ace Cosby
Yeah, maybe.
Christy Lee
What do you mean here?
Chick McGee
People are helping in the United States. That was in. Where was?
Tom Griswold
Oh, I thought you meant here at the station.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Ace Cosby
So, single? Yeah. I don't know.
Tom Griswold
Might.
Christy Lee
I don't think so.
Tom Griswold
I don't like drinking coffee at four o' clock in the afternoon. I'd be up all night. Then I'd have to go to a real club. Now you're double dipping.
Christy Lee
When's the last time? Normally. When's the last time you go to Starbucks? Starbucks? For the day. Is it like noon or.
Chick McGee
Well, no, later in the afternoon.
Christy Lee
Really?
Chick McGee
Yeah, sure.
Christy Lee
Not having trouble sleeping?
Chick McGee
No, no. I can go all the time. And.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, two seconds.
Christy Lee
No kidding.
Chick McGee
Yeah, but I. I'm just not sure that would work in the States.
Tom Griswold
I don't know. I think it would. Especially in the college towns. I bet.
Chick McGee
Four o' clock dance. Dance party. I invite. It was a coffee place. There'd be more grinding than bumping if you're doing the old bump and grind. Do you have a disco ball at your house, Christy?
Tom Griswold
No. Do you have a disco ball at your house?
Chick McGee
Of course.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, of course.
Christy Lee
Oh, is it in the basement or where they dance?
Chick McGee
I've got to reset it up. It was at my old house in the basement, you know.
Tom Griswold
Well, you have little kids. Of course you do.
Christy Lee
Is it like the basket? A basketball size?
Chick McGee
A little smaller, yeah.
Christy Lee
Okay.
Ace Cosby
That's fun.
Chick McGee
Oh, it is great. You stick that light on it and it sure.
Tom Griswold
Do you go down there and dance with the girls?
Chick McGee
I. I supervise, you know.
Christy Lee
And then just for fun, you take a little bump of cocaine before you go down there.
Chick McGee
Sure, sure.
Christy Lee
Disco ball.
Chick McGee
Yeah. My cardiologist recommends. Yeah, man, Just, just keep, keep, keep that. The pace of that heart. Little. Just a little extra.
Christy Lee
So hot. So hot, man.
Tom Griswold
The beverage company Liquid Death has sold out of 10 empty cans of ice iced tea that were all consumed by Ozzy Osbourne. There's the product description. The Prince of darkness drank from 10 cans of liquid Deaths low calorie iced tea and even crushed the cans himself.
Chick McGee
Oh.
Tom Griswold
In the process he left behind trace DNA from a saliva you could now own.
Chick McGee
Oh.
Tom Griswold
Though the website cautioned DNA integrity and cloning results not guaranteed.
Christy Lee
A disease might be caught.
Tom Griswold
We're all placed in individual containers bearing Mr. Osborne's autograph and listed for $450 each before selling out.
Christy Lee
All right.
Chick McGee
Do you remember this? I forget. If you were here that day, Ace will Remember when you guys see Red Butts? Yeah. Ozzy was here and he was smoking. And then a guy knocked on our door, like at 11 o' clock in the morning after the show. And he goes, do you still have the ashtray that Ozzy was smoking with? I mean, yeah. And he. He took the cigarettes. So there's some guy out there with Ozzy Osborne. I forget what brand he was smoking. I think they were Marlboros. I'm trying to remember.
Ace Cosby
I don't know.
Chick McGee
But yeah, Ozzy. Ozzy was here.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, he was here. I have a picture of him picking me up. Not literally. I mean, literally picking me up. Not like trying to hit on me, picking me up.
Ace Cosby
Yeah, yeah.
Josh Arnold
He smoked in this room, the other.
Chick McGee
Room, the previous studios. That's the one where he famously.
Ace Cosby
Among.
Chick McGee
Other things, we had him do. Right, those recorded things. Hi, this is Ozzy Osborne. You're listening to Bob and et cetera, et cetera.
Josh Arnold
There's a clip of the guy from, I think from Metallica talking about Ozzy. He had visited Ozzy Osbourne. And Ozzy Osbourne says, I don't smoke anymore, I don't drink anymore, I don't do drugs and my penis doesn't work. Why am I alive?
Ace Cosby
I have a bottle of used shampoo from Ozzy Osbourne.
Josh Arnold
What?
Ace Cosby
Johnson and Johnson. No more tears.
Chick McGee
You know, for a second I believed him. For a second.
Josh Arnold
He's a good c.
Chick McGee
Very convincing. Well, let's move forward here. I want to remind you about our friends at the Silac Insurance Company. They bring you the Christy Lee news desk.
Tom Griswold
Yes, they do.
Chick McGee
They also want to bring you cash when it's time to retire. That's what Silac is all about. Annuities, my friends. What is an annuity? Well, talk to the experts of the Silac Insurance Company. They'll explain what it is. You can turn down the gloom and doom and the uncertainty of the stock market these days. With annuities, it's a much more stable situation. It's called countering the volatility of the stock market, having your retirement come to you and you're gonna know what it's gonna be. And by the way, you cannot outlive your money. Get all the details from the folks at Silec. Now, how to do that? Well, you can go to their website, S I l a c silacins.com or. Here's an easy way to do it. You just take your phone and you call £250 and say out loud the words lifetime income, that's £250. Just say lifetime income to get information about your retirement down the road, how you can still be getting a paycheck if you will. Once again, £250, say lifetime income. Or just go to the Bob and Tom website. We got a link to the Silac folks. Or just go to silacins.com an annuity from the Silac insurance company. Plan on it. Live on it. Christy, what do you got? Coming up.
Tom Griswold
Coming up, we have writing thank you notes in the news again. Didn't we just have that the other day? If you were planning a trip to Paris, you might be a little bit disappointed in one of the top tourist attractions there. And beads found on the moon back in the 70s are now being studied.
Chick McGee
Beads. We'll find out what that's all about. A little bit of stellar news also coming up. Ali Breen, comedian, will be our guest with sexy time. This is the Bob and Tom Show.
Jessica Alsman
Thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom show this morning. The show is also out there for you on our YouTube channel. Watch and subscribe. This is the Bob and Tom Show.
Christy Lee
Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. At the SILAC Insurance news desk, it's Christy Lee. There's Pat Godwin. Hello. Hello. Josh Arnold.
Ace Cosby
Hello.
Christy Lee
Ace Cosby. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. I'm Chick McGee and. Hello, Tom. You all set?
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
We got an answer for you.
Christy Lee
Okay.
Tom Griswold
Answer for what, Christy?
Christy Lee
There was a question.
Chick McGee
Yeah, there. Christy mentioned pigs earlier this morning. Go ahead, say it again.
Tom Griswold
Yes. On my way home from work, I drive by a home that has a pig.
Christy Lee
Just a regular looking home.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, it's a nice home. It's on a corner lot and like.
Chick McGee
A suburban Leave it to Beaver type home.
Tom Griswold
More of an older farmhouse.
Chick McGee
Okay, very good. We should explain you live several counties over.
Tom Griswold
I do. I live in more of a.
Chick McGee
In a state where marijuana is legal.
Christy Lee
Might be the central time zone. We're not sure.
Chick McGee
Yeah, it's unbelievable.
Tom Griswold
But they also have chickens and roosters. But they have this pig. And it was the first time since I just moved there. I had not seen the pig until yesterday. And he scared me because there's no fence. And I thought, how is the pig not going to the road? You know, it just worried me.
Chick McGee
Got a letter here. This guy says we're in the invisible fence business. Invisible fences for dogs.
Tom Griswold
Yes.
Chick McGee
There's a couple different versions of Invisible fence is a name brand. Your dog wears a little collar with a buzzer. Thing on it. And my experience with invisible fence. They train very quickly.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
Most dogs, not all breeds, but most check with invisible fence for details. He said we often would do invisible fences for people with pigs, goats, horses, and other animals. So I don't know. That's what he says. So this guy used to install them.
Tom Griswold
Huh. Oscar lives near me, too. He does. He goes the same way home. And he said they have goats, too, but I haven't seen the goats yet.
Christy Lee
Huh.
Tom Griswold
I just.
Ace Cosby
Okay, so the answer is maybe they have an invisible fence.
Chick McGee
Maybe. Yeah. And I don't know about the chickens, I think.
Christy Lee
So this is maybe an answer.
Tom Griswold
I think chickens don't cross the road. We all know that.
Chick McGee
And now we're getting into metaphysics. And that's the way out of my pay grade.
Christy Lee
So it's really not an answer at all.
Chick McGee
No. This guy said they installed them for people all the time. So that was.
Ace Cosby
But we don't know if that happened at this house.
Christy Lee
Right. It's all.
Chick McGee
Yeah, certainly one.
Ace Cosby
Because then you would presume you'd also have to put a collar around a horse and a pig and a goat.
Christy Lee
And this is all hearsay evidence.
Chick McGee
Yes.
Christy Lee
You'd be thrown out in court. You know that.
Chick McGee
I think the jury. They were reasonable people. I mean, the OJ Jury wouldn't decide properly, but I mean, nothing good.
Ace Cosby
The unadmissible.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Josh Arnold
Speculation.
Chick McGee
West. Okay. And the other question that we asked, I believe, Josh, was we had the interesting study from a university in Utah about the. The dunking of Oreo cookies. I did a little homework during the break. Mechanical engineers at MIT have also been studying the Oreo cookie.
Christy Lee
Mitt University.
Chick McGee
Yes. Because we've solved lots of other problems. Homelessness, poverty, disease. We're looking into Oreos at MIT regarding the torque required to twist open an Oreo.
Christy Lee
Oh, I like the sound of this already.
Chick McGee
And is it possible to evenly distribute the cream filling on both wafers?
Ace Cosby
Oh, I'm gonna say impossible.
Chick McGee
You're correct. It is not possible. MIT scientists found the torque required to twist open an Oreo is similar to that required to turn a doorknob and about one tenth of what is needed to twist open a bottle cap.
Christy Lee
Good Lord.
Chick McGee
The study's author, Crystal Owens, spoke to the folks at CNN and reported. We learned, sadly, that even if you twist an Oreo perfectly, the cream will almost always end. End up mostly on one of the two wafers. There is no easy way to get it to split between wafers.
Tom Griswold
This is what we're teaching our kids in college.
Chick McGee
Well, I think this was probably coordinated with something very serious. This appears in the journal the Physics of Fluids.
Tom Griswold
Well, that's a fault right there. There are no fluids involved.
Chick McGee
I imagine that's more viscous. I think fluids probably covers the gamut of. Of. I. I don't know. This is. Now. Do you know how long you're supposed to dunk Little Debbie?
Ace Cosby
No.
Chick McGee
Until she turns blue.
Christy Lee
The implication there is you're drowning.
Tom Griswold
Poor little Debbie. What did she do?
Ace Cosby
You know, you could go a hostess.
Christy Lee
As well or Dolly Madison.
Tom Griswold
Oatmeal cream pies. Oh. Oh, I love them.
Chick McGee
Now this is the same group that you remember this story, Christy, at mit. They. They were studying tampons absorbency and they came up with string theory. They're.
Tom Griswold
Please.
Chick McGee
Oh, come on. Have you ever. You.
Christy Lee
You said it was impossible to. When you twist an Oreo cookie apart to get the same filling on difficult.
Chick McGee
What was her quote? She said it's. It will almost always end up on one of the two wafers. It's not easy to get it to split.
Christy Lee
Have you ever seen the German splitting Splitting championships?
Chick McGee
No.
Christy Lee
This is where they take a pretzel. Like a. Not a. Not a pretzel. A big pretzel.
Ace Cosby
Like a soft pretzel.
Christy Lee
Like a soft pretzel, but not that big.
Ace Cosby
Okay.
Christy Lee
And they cut it in half. And each side of the pretzel has to weigh the exact same.
Ace Cosby
Wow.
Chick McGee
Wow.
Christy Lee
And this is on German television late at night. And watch this bastard cut this pretzel. There he is. Just a normal everyday pretzel. And they weigh them. Of course.
Chick McGee
It's a game show.
Christy Lee
It's a game show. And.
Chick McGee
Oh my.
Christy Lee
Look at that. 044. Both. Both sides.
Chick McGee
See, this is a guy that had kids because as you know, when you. If you're. If you're like me and you have multiple children, Catherine, you never. If. Let's say you have two kids, right? You never have one of anything.
Tom Griswold
Right?
Chick McGee
And if you do, you have to split it no matter what it is.
Christy Lee
So that guy's got it down, man.
Chick McGee
And that. And then if you. If you cut it and you give one the choice, there's always going to be an argument.
Tom Griswold
Well, that one was bigger than mine.
Chick McGee
That is. That's a hilarious concept for a show. Well, kids, we have a puppy. I want the.
Christy Lee
Oh, well, that's where you come in. And who is the king? We'll cut the puppy in half. And.
Ace Cosby
Right. Oh, the true owner of the puppy.
Chick McGee
Interesting. Interesting stuff. That's funny. Where did you happen to come upon that. That's just great.
Christy Lee
Just stuff on the old Twitter feed or whatever they're calling it. Yeah, they've got all. They have a game show where you take a. An egg, and they have little circles cut through plexiglass, and you have to pass the egg through the circles from point A to point B. And whoever gets to point B first wins. But they. You have to reach through the hole with a spoon. Oh, it's. It's nuts.
Chick McGee
Remember the thing we.
Christy Lee
German televisions. We can only dream of.
Chick McGee
Remember the thing we used to do where we would put a golf ball in a guy's pants?
Christy Lee
Huh?
Chick McGee
In the pant leg. Remember this?
Tom Griswold
Yeah. These are trick games.
Chick McGee
Golf ball in a guy's pants and the woman had at the bottom by his.
Christy Lee
Yeah. With a woman.
Chick McGee
And then a woman had to move it up and around to the other leg. Face it. Frivolity ensued.
Christy Lee
And we also tied nylons or around a girl, put an orange in the bottom. And you had to knock over bottom.
Tom Griswold
Yeah. You had to swing it and knock over without using your hands.
Chick McGee
Yeah. We're really glad that they didn't have those. And I hosted cameras on the phone.
Christy Lee
I hosted musical chairs at a bar for about nine, 10 years. And.
Tom Griswold
In banana eating contest. Oh, yeah, we had.
Christy Lee
Oh, we put. We put whipped cream on beer bottles and had whipped cream.
Ace Cosby
Ah, yes.
Christy Lee
Sucked off, you know.
Chick McGee
Sure.
Tom Griswold
This is how we made extra money back in the day.
Chick McGee
Ever try to split popsicles?
Tom Griswold
What?
Ace Cosby
That can be difficult.
Chick McGee
You'd get the double popsicle.
Ace Cosby
Right.
Chick McGee
You'd smack them down, and one of them would have that entire no man's land on it. Yeah.
Christy Lee
Hasn't someone wised up at the popsicle factory and just sold singles instead of all double? They've had to do that, right?
Ace Cosby
They do that even when I was a kid, you could get singles.
Christy Lee
No kidding.
Ace Cosby
Yeah.
Chick McGee
I went through a popsicle phase.
Christy Lee
I bet you did. Oh, as an adult. I know you did.
Chick McGee
Yeah. Post heart surgery.
Ace Cosby
Oh.
Chick McGee
You don't feel like eating for like three weeks. But I can remember they'd come in and. Do you have any more grape?
Ace Cosby
You know who always kind of hated them.
Christy Lee
You know, I don't know if he's still this way. You know who's crazy about popsicles is Nick Griffin.
Chick McGee
No kidding.
Christy Lee
He can eat a package of popsicles in one sitting.
Tom Griswold
He doesn't look like a popsicle guy to me.
Christy Lee
He loves popsicles.
Tom Griswold
Popsicle.
Christy Lee
Yes, sir.
Ace Cosby
What's your.
Chick McGee
What's your philosophy post eating the popsicle with the stick? Keep it intact. Do you break it and play with the halves?
Christy Lee
I don't break it and break up the hat.
Tom Griswold
What?
Christy Lee
I bet you tore wings off flies, too. Didn't you put a neighbor's dog on a stick in the backyard?
Chick McGee
Did the same to my, to my coffee stirrers. Absolutely.
Christy Lee
You break them in half and play. Oh, Tom.
Chick McGee
And then you see how you can get the halves to match. Okay. I thought I was the only one, huh?
Ace Cosby
Don't know who you are.
Chick McGee
Okay, thank you very much. Coming up, a little bit of sexy time with with Ali Breen. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Part Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.
Jessica Alsman
Become a Bob and Tom VIP and get your Bob and Tom fix 24. 7. Get all the info in the VIP area@bob and tom.com.
Chick McGee
Oh.
Christy Lee
Welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. At the Silac Insurance news desk, it's Christy Lake. Hey, there's Pat Galleries Godwin.
Chick McGee
Hello.
Christy Lee
Jessica Alsman joins us.
Kenny Tarmac
Hi there.
Christy Lee
There's Josh Arnold.
Ace Cosby
Hi.
Christy Lee
Ace Cosby. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts studios. Think O'Reilly Auto Parts. For all your car care needs. Get the parts and service you need fast from the parts people at O'Reilly Auto Parts.
Chick McGee
Tom, I got another pig update once again.
Christy Lee
All right, all you pigs out there listening.
Chick McGee
Christy was driving home and she lives in a somewhat rural area. Yeah, rural. I can't say that you're doing it right.
Christy Lee
It just sounds wrong.
Chick McGee
You could say pastoral or country Agra.
Tom Griswold
I live in the country.
Chick McGee
Country. That'll, that'll work out in the holidays. Christy lives in the country.
Christy Lee
Out in the country.
Chick McGee
She's driving around and she sees this.
Christy Lee
Loose pig, you know, sticking her nose in people's business.
Tom Griswold
You know, I was not, I was at a four way stop.
Christy Lee
I wonder what's going on over there with the p. Pigs. Oh, what are they doing? The question is none of my business.
Tom Griswold
But by God I'm gonna find out exactly right.
Chick McGee
So the question is, can pigs be put on a so called invisible fence, which is the dog thing where the dog wears a collar and they, and they bury the wires. I've had one for years.
Christy Lee
Can you cook a pig by running voltage through it?
Chick McGee
Good start. The answer probably is yes. I'm not sure how thoroughly it would cook it. This is a different question for a different time. According to this news account, pigs are capable of using an invisible fence. Some of them, however, there are challenges. It says here they may try to tunnel under the boundary.
Tom Griswold
They're so smart, they Dig?
Chick McGee
Yes. And they're very bright.
Christy Lee
They dig man.
Chick McGee
Often farmers will use visible above ground electronics.
Christy Lee
Wait a minute. This might be an answer for you electrify your yard, keep the raccoons off out of your bird feeder.
Kenny Tarmac
Oh, you got a problem with raccoons?
Christy Lee
The birds aren't gonna land in the yard.
Chick McGee
Then you'd have to catch the raccoons and put the collars on them.
Christy Lee
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. You're missing my point. No, that would keep them in the yard. Well, no, that would keep. My point is you electrify the entire area so that when they can get in their two little feet.
Ace Cosby
Whatever happened to good old fashioned landmines?
Christy Lee
Yes.
Chick McGee
Yeah, you get a lot of.
Christy Lee
Or a nice handgun.
Tom Griswold
I don. Ever since I changed to the Cajun hot seed, I haven't had a squirrel.
Ace Cosby
Cajun bird seed. Who knew?
Tom Griswold
I haven't had a raccoon.
Christy Lee
That's what you did?
Tom Griswold
Yes.
Chick McGee
That's interesting.
Tom Griswold
Of course.
Chick McGee
Every blue jay has a red anus.
Tom Griswold
Now blue jays are. Look, they're bullies.
Chick McGee
You're using. What is this bird seed you're using?
Tom Griswold
Yeah, it's like a Cajun hot seed bird.
Chick McGee
And the squirrels don't like it?
Tom Griswold
No. Because apparently birds don't have taste buds. But the squirrels and raccoons obviously do. So they don't like the taste of it.
Ace Cosby
See, I thought it was just all Cajun food.
Christy Lee
That explains why there are no bird gourmets. They don't have taste.
Chick McGee
Good to know in any event, Christie. So that may be that that pig may be wearing an invisible fence maybe. So it's not. Yeah.
Tom Griswold
They also one of those weird looking pigs. It's not like a pink pig. It's.
Ace Cosby
Was he a black kind of gray.
Tom Griswold
Kind of black and gray? Yeah. Yeah. He's not the normal normal.
Chick McGee
Have you seen those new. Those GPS dog collars?
Tom Griswold
Yes, I want those.
Chick McGee
Well, do you have a thousand bucks?
Tom Griswold
I know.
Christy Lee
Well, they go in the. In the collar, right? Or something?
Chick McGee
Yeah, it's sewn into the collar. The dog has a GPS collar on, I guess. And you program. You can program. Program it wherever you want and you can change it up and.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, I just don't.
Chick McGee
I think they're a thousand bucks.
Tom Griswold
There are quite a few different options now. They've come down and perform price. But I think my dogs would still run. I don't know. I don't know. It's hard to make that. It's hard to make that.
Chick McGee
What do you have Andy wear to keep him from running.
Christy Lee
Pretty short leash, you know.
Chick McGee
Cologne.
Tom Griswold
I don't think my dogs would run away, but he seems to think they will.
Christy Lee
Well, they're doodles. They're too dumb, them wanting to run away. I almost understand.
Chick McGee
One of my guys I thought would never run away. The other day, I was just casually sitting outside for a change, and he saw something in the woods and took off. But I got to meet. I got to meet my. The neighbors behind me.
Tom Griswold
Are they nice?
Chick McGee
Yeah. Guy was heading to Beaver island the next day.
Tom Griswold
Oh, Jesus.
Josh Arnold
How'd you find that out?
Christy Lee
He told me, sticking his nose in other people's business.
Chick McGee
We got talking Beaver island, of course, the largest of the island islands in the Great Lakes.
Tom Griswold
Really?
Chick McGee
Well, in Lake Michigan.
Christy Lee
Haunted by sailors from the Edmund Fitzgerald.
Chick McGee
Wrong, Wrong Lakes.
Christy Lee
Some people, they walked across the land.
Tom Griswold
Is it full of beavers? Is that why they call it Beaver Island?
Chick McGee
Maybe at some point.
Josh Arnold
Beaver.
Christy Lee
Beaver.
Chick McGee
Against the law for women to shave.
Christy Lee
You know, it's not, but it should be.
Chick McGee
Okay.
Ace Cosby
Yeah, I'll vote for that person.
Chick McGee
Okay. Never knew. Welcome back to the Babaton program. Thank you very much for joining us. I forget where we were. I think we were talking to Christy Lee at the Silac insurance news desk. Getting ready for sexy time. What have you got over there?
Tom Griswold
I got to go ahead to do this. Hikers along the Appalachian Trail can indulge in an ice cream challenge at a Pennsylvania country store. Midway through the trek. The unusual challenge is thought to have begun more than four decades ago at the Pine Grove Furnace general store in Gardner's, which is a few miles north of the current true halfway point on the 2,197mile long trail.
Ace Cosby
You have said so much, and I still don't know what this is about.
Chick McGee
If you're. If you're hiking, you know what the Appalachian Trail is?
Ace Cosby
Sure.
Christy Lee
All I've heard is they're eating ice cream on the Appalachian.
Chick McGee
And if you're. If you're halfway there, as kind of a tradition, you're supposed to eat all.
Tom Griswold
This ice cream, half a gallon of ice cream, as quickly as possible. So far this year, about 50.
Christy Lee
Tell me you're an elitist without telling me you're nowhere. The Appalachian Trail is iroyle. You're an elitist.
Tom Griswold
Really? You think?
Christy Lee
Oh, yeah, I know.
Tom Griswold
Let alone they have finished the challenge, earning the honor of having their photos posted on a store bulletin board. Kind of like if you eat the giant steak or the giant burger or whatever you get.
Ace Cosby
Is this the story just informing us.
Tom Griswold
Of this or the ice cream challenge record, less than four minutes, was set two years ago by a man. Man with.
Christy Lee
So it's breaking.
Chick McGee
It's breaking news.
Ace Cosby
Wouldn't you have rather heard a Haywood song?
Josh Arnold
I hadn't heard toasted.
Christy Lee
Wait a minute. I'm thinking. Hang on.
Ace Cosby
The old Jack Benny.
Chick McGee
I'm. I'm cleaning up where I spilled my iced tea. You guys keep going through.
Tom Griswold
Hikers who want to attempt the record may only allow the $12 worth of ice cream to start to melt in the sun for just a few minutes before they attack.
Ace Cosby
New story.
Tom Griswold
Ice cream will melt in calendar timed by a store employee.
Chick McGee
Wouldn't you rather hear about this than about, you know, some hillbilly raping a guy walking the trail?
Ace Cosby
I'd way rather hear Josh.
Josh Arnold
That's way more exciting.
Christy Lee
Absolutely.
Chick McGee
What I also love about this story, if you're further down, it gives. Further down, it gives. The guy I tried to give. You're supposed to. You're supposed to have a trail name, right?
Tom Griswold
Trail names.
Chick McGee
You gave yourself a trail name. It's kind of like a handle. Like Johnny.
Ace Cosby
Johnny hikes a lot.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, well, this guy's name was Squirt. What a stupid trail name.
Chick McGee
That is not lazy.
Christy Lee
Yeah, my name's Squirt.
Chick McGee
Speedy, how you doing? I'm just reading some of them.
Ace Cosby
Not Lazy is one of them.
Chick McGee
You can still eat, by the way, Josh, you can still have that much ice cream without walking the trail.
Ace Cosby
By the way, how much is it?
Tom Griswold
12 bucks.
Ace Cosby
No, no.
Chick McGee
A half gallon of ice cream. And what was the record?
Tom Griswold
Four minutes.
Ace Cosby
Half gallon. What's your. I don't. I don't know. Ice cream.
Tom Griswold
Half gallon is. The block. The box.
Chick McGee
The box.
Ace Cosby
Okay. So the box, that is the whole box is half a gallon?
Tom Griswold
I believe so.
Ace Cosby
That is way too much.
Chick McGee
It is.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Chick McGee
And your head. I mean, I get terrible ice cream headaches, even trying to eat a cone at Dairy Queen.
Tom Griswold
If I ate it too fast in four minutes, that's.
Ace Cosby
Oh, that is a tough challenge.
Chick McGee
Yeah. I mean, don't you. The first time you ever have that brain freeze thing, don't you think that you're having some kind of epic stroke?
Ace Cosby
It hurts. They say push your tongue to the roof of your mouth.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Tom Griswold
Oh, really?
Ace Cosby
Yes.
Tom Griswold
I didn't know that.
Chick McGee
Yeah, I. Those things are terrifying. I would not want to eat that ice cream. You can have ice cream.
Tom Griswold
We have ice cream in the freezer right now.
Christy Lee
Oh, yeah. So we do.
Chick McGee
Which one do you have?
Tom Griswold
I don't know. What's in there we have a couple flavors.
Christy Lee
We also have soda pop. What do we have? Kind of weird soda pop, bacon and.
Chick McGee
Oh yeah, here we go. There's a challenge here.
Ace Cosby
I forgot bacon soda.
Chick McGee
Here we are.
Tom Griswold
Done with the bacon.
Chick McGee
Mike Mark said his what is Patrick Casson has two bottles of flavored soda. Soda from Holland, Michigan from the Tulip Festival. Oh, they're in the fridge. There's a sweet corn soda and a bacon soda.
Tom Griswold
I bet the sweet corn soda is not bad.
Chick McGee
Crack it open. Do you want to, want to give it a taste?
Tom Griswold
Well, maybe later. Okay. Coming up. Okay, things to do.
Chick McGee
Right now, I want to tell you about the beauty of, of Raycon earbuds. They're awesome. They're great and they fit in your ear.
Christy Lee
That's. Yes, they do. And they've been updated. Tom. Premium audio that goes where you go. Raycon's latest model, better than ever. 32 hour battery life, multi point connectivity. You can pair two devices at once. And Raycon has a quick charge function. It's 10 minutes of charging, 90 minutes of battery. And they also come with active noise cancellation. Available in all the colors and a 30 day happiness guarantee return policy with Raycon. Plus of course, we have a deal for you. Just go to buyraycon.com tom and get 15% off Raycon's best selling everyday earbuds. Raycon 15% off their best selling everyday earbuds. But you have to go to buyraycon.com tom that's buyraycon.com tom and they'll stay.
Chick McGee
In your ear and they'll fit in your ear and they sound great and they cost half as much as those little white ones. What are you waiting for when we come back? Yeah, what are you waiting for? I like hostility to sell.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
Now when we come back, we're going to be talking a little bit of sex time with Ali Breen. Tell us your love troubles. We'd like to hear from you. From the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios, this remains the Bob and Tom Show.
Christy Lee
Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios and it's time for once again delving into the lives of our listeners. People who think, I hope, have the best intentions but then something always goes horribly wrong. What do you call it?
Chick McGee
Bad advice? Oh, no, I mean I, I call the show Sexy time. No, Sexy Time. There you go. And there she is. It's the sex goddess with the big glasses. It's Ally Breen, apparently about to go shoot some hoops. She's got. She's got her basketball jersey on and what, she's wearing a tank.
Ali Breen
Is this the color of someone playing right now? Yeah, I haven't even been watching.
Tom Griswold
No.
Chick McGee
It should be Ally Breen with her gigantic glasses.
Ace Cosby
The better to see us with.
Chick McGee
Yeah, my dear, they look great. And we missed you last week, Ally, but we did. We did the show without you and it was the usual failure.
Ali Breen
I bet that you saved some lives.
Chick McGee
I'm not so sure. Ally can be found on your favorite social media platform. It's a L L I B R E E N. When she's not on stage doing great stand up comedy, she's helping loved among the lovers out there. And she's also on Only fans. A L L I B is where you will find her. Have you done the thing where you roll in the paint yet?
Ali Breen
No, I still haven't done that. But I might. I might start winding it down. I haven't been paying enough attention to it. That might be my grand finale. I. Yeah, I don't know how much longer I'll be on there because I feel bad.
Chick McGee
I don't.
Ali Breen
I'm not putting a lot of content out there.
Chick McGee
Oh, come on, step up.
Ali Breen
Get some butt paint pictures going.
Kenny Tarmac
Yeah.
Chick McGee
Okay, let's get to our first letter. What's happening out there?
Ali Breen
Dear Ally, I walked into the bathroom on my husband at the sink, really hardcore inspecting his penis. Is there a reason you'd be doing this other than him possibly cheating on me?
Ace Cosby
Cheating on me?
Christy Lee
What?
Tom Griswold
What did you make that looking for herpes?
Christy Lee
Absolutely correct. He's cheating on the only reason you look at your penis like that.
Ali Breen
What do you guys hardcore inspect your penis in the bathroom?
Chick McGee
Conceivably, it could be chafed.
Ace Cosby
Right? Right.
Chick McGee
He could have had an accident with his zipper. I think every guy out there, he.
Ace Cosby
Could have heard a podcast that said, hey, every now and again take a look for something.
Chick McGee
You know what I mean?
Ace Cosby
Why anything?
Tom Griswold
Why did she jump to that?
Ace Cosby
Yeah. Even grooming probably because, oh, he must be looking for an std, right? So I don't have them. So his girlfriend must. That kind of thing.
Ali Breen
Someone must have done something, right?
Ace Cosby
No, no, no.
Chick McGee
He probably. He was maybe grooming and he could have slipped and cut something.
Ace Cosby
You know what I often do when something like anything like this happens with a significant other instead of writing a radio show, I ask, hey, is everything okay, honey?
Tom Griswold
Yeah, yeah.
Ace Cosby
Do you want me to look at something to see if it seems weird?
Ali Breen
That's a sweet relationship. Do you want me to inspect Your weird, possibly diseased penis anywhere.
Ace Cosby
I have something on my arm. I go, hey, does this look weird to you? That kind of thing?
Tom Griswold
If he.
Ace Cosby
And it's also my pickup line, hey, does my penis look weird?
Josh Arnold
I try that enough, you'll get a.
Chick McGee
Maybe he.
Christy Lee
He.
Chick McGee
He should have gone, can you see my tan lines? I'm trying to. Trying to go parfait.
Tom Griswold
If he gets nervous when you ask him that, then maybe you have something to be worried about.
Chick McGee
Way too paranoid.
Kenny Tarmac
Yeah, answers with a question and he's lying.
Ace Cosby
And sometimes guys are guys. They just want to take a look, see how everything is.
Chick McGee
What's going on down there? Are you bigger than you were yesterday?
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Ali Breen
Hey, buddy, what's up?
Christy Lee
Got to keep an eye. Eye on it.
Chick McGee
Yeah, I'm doing some weight training. Trying to get a little bit bigger. I don't know. This. This is a. Not to use a bad pun. A stretch, I think.
Tom Griswold
Lighten up.
Kenny Tarmac
If you start itching, then you can worry.
Chick McGee
Right?
Ace Cosby
In fact, I'm wondering if you're cheating on him.
Tom Griswold
That's what I was going to say.
Ali Breen
Oh, projecting.
Tom Griswold
I honestly was, Josh. I was thinking the same thing.
Chick McGee
Okay, well, let's move. Let's move forward here. Enough speculation. We'll try to solve someone else's issues. What else is happening?
Ali Breen
Dear Ally, my boyfriend farts in front of me all the time. I've kind of gotten used to it. But the bigger concern is he lets him rip. Totally in public. Do guys actually have a harder time holding them in or something? Or does he really just not care?
Ace Cosby
Yeah, there's.
Chick McGee
Is this guy European? Is he like from Germany where they.
Ali Breen
Let him rip, are they not?
Tom Griswold
Yeah, that's a thing in. In Germany.
Chick McGee
Oh, yeah, they don't care. Ah.
Ace Cosby
I know that seems Germany has.
Ali Breen
Some really weird behaviors attached to it.
Christy Lee
The.
Ace Cosby
In weird.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, yeah.
Chick McGee
The fact that he's so relaxed about it.
Kenny Tarmac
Also proud even, it seems.
Christy Lee
Does he have. Does he add up?
Chick McGee
You've matched yourself with. With someone who has a great deal of self confidence. They're very comfortable within their own skin.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, that's true.
Ali Breen
That's probably true.
Chick McGee
I've been trying to do that my entire life. Never have I been successful at being comfortable being myself. So this guy.
Ali Breen
I thought you meant publicly.
Chick McGee
No, no, I would.
Tom Griswold
Let's do a deep dive on that. Tom, why are you not comfortable with yourself?
Christy Lee
I don't care if he's comfortable with himself or not. Just pick a personality. Okay. Would you.
Ace Cosby
I don't want to wander into any of these caves yes.
Christy Lee
And why do we have to come in there with you?
Chick McGee
So sorry. Let's get back to our letters. We're talking with Ali Breen, comedian, and Ally is accepting your letters at Ali Breen and your favorite social media platform. What have you got, Ally?
Ali Breen
I just want to note Tom deflected pretty quickly when we tried to spotlight on him.
Ace Cosby
Look at that.
Tom Griswold
He does it all the time.
Ali Breen
Dear Ally, my wife did the Botox and lip filler thing and she looks like one of the Real Housewives of the Midwest. I told her she's made herself look way less attractive and now she's mad at me. Isn't that a compliment? That I prefer her to be natural? How do I get out of this?
Ace Cosby
Yes, but there's a different way to put it.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Kenny Tarmac
She can't just take out the filler roll real quick.
Chick McGee
She's got a time period which doesn't. I. Which one of those wears off?
Tom Griswold
Both of them.
Kenny Tarmac
They both will.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Ali Breen
I think. Oh, yeah. All of that does.
Tom Griswold
It all wears off after a while, but it takes a while.
Ali Breen
Does it leave a weird, like, thing behind or do you go back to normal?
Tom Griswold
I, I, Yeah, like something like stretch.
Ace Cosby
Marks on your lips?
Tom Griswold
I don't think so. I have never done them, so I don't know for sure, but I, I don't believe it. Like, leaves.
Ace Cosby
You haven't done them downstairs?
Tom Griswold
No.
Chick McGee
No.
Christy Lee
You mean, look at me?
Tom Griswold
Do I look like I've done anything?
Josh Arnold
No, we can't see that.
Ali Breen
Wait till that becomes a trend.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Tom Griswold
Oh, that's become a trend, hasn't it?
Ali Breen
Oh, has it?
Ace Cosby
Labial puffing.
Chick McGee
What? What?
Ace Cosby
Yeah, we had a story about that.
Christy Lee
You want to see it?
Chick McGee
Is that where they, where they inject it down there?
Ace Cosby
Yeah, we talked about it.
Christy Lee
I think Josh wants to see him through the yoga pants. Right.
Ace Cosby
There are men out there who want to. Yeah. They want to be able to see everything. I think, I believe it's. Comedian Jim Norton said he wants to be able to see it through a snowsuit.
Chick McGee
So the, the question is, should he? Yeah. So he said to her, isn't it a compliment?
Ali Breen
She shouldn't be mad. But you're right. Josh is right. He said, he said you made yourself look less attractive.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, that's not what he said.
Ali Breen
Not the way to go about it.
Christy Lee
Okay.
Ace Cosby
I think the first, one of the first things you can ask is, oh, what are your. How do you feel now that you have the. Are you happy with it?
Chick McGee
What do you think?
Ali Breen
Do you like it?
Ace Cosby
Yeah. Yeah.
Chick McGee
But there is that sort of generic face that some of these women have where they all start looking the same. They have cheekbone implants, they get all this puffy stuff and it's like you're looking at the same person.
Tom Griswold
Go to the grocery store in Beverly Hills, you'll know exactly what he's talking about.
Ace Cosby
If a woman gets something like that done and then she says, what do you think? Think? And I say, you know what, it looks pretty good. I'll be honest. I prefer your natural lips.
Josh Arnold
There you go.
Ace Cosby
But how do you.
Christy Lee
But no, that be fine.
Kenny Tarmac
That would be much better at all. Like, oh, cool.
Christy Lee
You immediately grab your chest and fall to the floor, say, I think I'm having a heart attack. Rush me to the hospital. Just, just don't answer any other question.
Chick McGee
No, no. Okay.
Ali Breen
I did a. Pretend you don't recognize her. Just go, who are you? Just freak out. Run out of the house.
Christy Lee
I'm blacking out, honey.
Chick McGee
Okay. Ally, I did a quick search on this and I ended up on the wrong side of things. It says, according to gq, the use of Botox on the testicles.
Tom Griswold
Oh, yeah, that's happening.
Chick McGee
Is growing in popularity. According to John Perez, a 35 year old working in the fashion industry. The most interesting part to me is that it will improve my sex life. It will make everything more sensitive. Sensitive.
Christy Lee
Oh yeah.
Chick McGee
They talked to Dr. Evan Reader who says over the past couple of years men have become more comfortable asking to get the wrinkles removed from their sack.
Tom Griswold
Yep. Wow. Story too. Yep.
Chick McGee
Yikes. It says a typical treatment that's a commitment will last three to four months of a quote, smooth sack for $1,000.
Tom Griswold
Wow.
Ace Cosby
That's 500 ball.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Ali Breen
And it makes the sex feel better. You would think that that would hurt more.
Chick McGee
I'm judge. I think this may be a gay thing.
Tom Griswold
Actually judging by, ah, interesting necessarily there are some men who care about the way their Zach looks. Really gay.
Chick McGee
Okay. It has to be fun because that's injected, right?
Tom Griswold
Yep.
Chick McGee
So. So the doctor is going to be saying the standard. You're going to feel a small prick and then the guy. So are you, Doc. That's why we're getting this done. Sorry. Let's get back to our letters. If you're just joining us. Hello. We are speaking with comedian Ally Breen and this is a segment we call Sexy Time. Coming to you from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Ellie, what do you got?
Ali Breen
Dear Allie, I've been married for five years and I love my wife, but I'm a little bored. So I started a Tinder profile just to start flirting with women. I've actually met some really cool people. They don't know I'm married, but I'm thinking of telling them and seeing if anyone is still game to start a little flint. So it actually helped my marriage, but I know if I got caught, it would end it. So my friend told me I need therapy, but honestly, this is better than therapy. What do you guys think?
Tom Griswold
You're gonna get divorced in about a year. You better start getting your stuff in order.
Christy Lee
I'd be curious to find out where it went from just to start a Tinder profile to telling them I'm married to see if they want to have an actual affair.
Ace Cosby
I think, yeah.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Ace Cosby
I think, Chick. The answer is before he even started the Tinder, Yes.
Tom Griswold
He was out before he even started.
Chick McGee
That was the goal from day one.
Ace Cosby
Yeah.
Chick McGee
You, you.
Ace Cosby
And you asking us is also just, we. You are going to do it. You're going to cheat on her, I hope.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Ali Breen
You want someone to say, yeah, that's reasonable.
Tom Griswold
She is going to find out.
Chick McGee
Yep.
Kenny Tarmac
You're going to match with one of her friends, or they're just going to.
Ali Breen
See you on there. Yeah, totally.
Tom Griswold
Yep.
Chick McGee
How do you. So how does this guy do? Does he put on, like, Superman glasses so that she'll never. She'll never recognize. Recognize me. I'm Clark Kent.
Christy Lee
I wonder how many times a day a woman has a friend of hers come up and say, I saw your husband's profile on Tinder. Oh, man.
Ali Breen
Oh, I bet a lot.
Christy Lee
I bet. Yeah.
Chick McGee
Isn't that preface with, I hate to be the one to tell you this, but I've been. I've been itching to do it all day.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Ace Cosby
Almost every.
Ali Breen
There's probably so much gaslighting after that, though, because people can be like, I got hacked. They stole my profile. They. I'm sure there's so many things that people say to excuse it.
Tom Griswold
So you wouldn't. If you ran across someone's profile on Tinder, you would not tell them.
Chick McGee
Well, how on earth would that happen? I don't.
Ace Cosby
Well, I wouldn't. I don't think I would, because it's none of my boy. That's a tough one.
Ali Breen
I know. It depends on how close the friend is, probably.
Ace Cosby
Yes, it does. Yeah.
Ali Breen
Yeah.
Tom Griswold
Oh, boy. That's a mindfall.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Kenny Tarmac
I would tell him. I don't care. I'd be like, hey, look, here's your husband on here. You might want to follow up on that.
Chick McGee
And by the way, he's a bad kisser.
Kenny Tarmac
Yeah. He didn't even take me anywhere nice.
Chick McGee
I told him to inspect his male member.
Ace Cosby
Christy gave the best. She said the best thing here, which is good luck, sir, because. Yeah, we're done. You're doing it. We know you're doing it.
Chick McGee
Yeah. Let's check in for sure. What does our next letter say? Allie?
Ali Breen
Dear Allie, my husband travels for work a lot and he never wants me to go with him.
Chick McGee
Oh God.
Ali Breen
He says it'll add a lot of stress to him and I'll probably be bored because he doesn't have time to do anything other than work. I'm totally fine with that. I can spend the day doing touristy stuff and go to a spa and then just basically have dinner and go to sleep with with them. The fact that he won't even try it makes me think he's either cheating, trying to cheat or needs a fair amount of space for me. And none of these things are good for a marriage, right?
Ace Cosby
No, no. The space thing is completely fine.
Tom Griswold
Right.
Ali Breen
Yeah.
Ace Cosby
This is tough because Godwin and I talk about this.
Josh Arnold
Traveling beyond the road. Yeah.
Ace Cosby
We can totally relate to this guy.
Josh Arnold
Yeah, absolutely.
Ace Cosby
You are, it's. You're in a different mindset.
Josh Arnold
You're in Lord Wolf at times.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Ace Cosby
And dinner is probably out. He's probably. If he's traveling for work, he probably has to have dinner with work people, clients, other. No, this guy's not up to anything bad. Leave. Let him go.
Ali Breen
He's about to lose it.
Christy Lee
I don't know. I don't know who said it first, but I can't miss you if you're not gone.
Chick McGee
Yes.
Tom Griswold
Space is important.
Chick McGee
Yeah. But also, this guy may need a lot of work time.
Tom Griswold
Exactly.
Chick McGee
He's on the road, he's working in the hotel room.
Ace Cosby
He might be answering emails.
Christy Lee
I don't know. How do you expect him to get late if his wife goes with him?
Chick McGee
That too is huge.
Kenny Tarmac
Come on, compromise. If he went someplace that was cool that she could go to though. Cuz I used to travel for work and I think one time my boyfriend came with me and so we got to do one touristy thing. Otherwise he was just kind of chilling in the car or the hotel when.
Ace Cosby
I'm fair to assume that he has the same.
Chick McGee
You know, sometimes the big deals are done, you know, with a guy could there. Hey, we're going to go bowling. Hey. By the way, during, you know, between the 9th and 10th frame, I did the big. I sold the thing and the Johnson account sealed and delivered we closed it.
Tom Griswold
Yeah.
Ace Cosby
It's one last thing.
Chick McGee
He.
Ace Cosby
Yeah. No, don't. You don't have to go.
Ali Breen
It's funny. My sister's married to a pilot and people are like, oh, that must be so hard. She's like, no, that's saving our marriage.
Ace Cosby
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Ali Breen
Oh, look at this guy.
Chick McGee
Wait a minute. There's a cat. I know.
Ali Breen
Yeah. Come on, buddy.
Ace Cosby
Never to mention this.
Chick McGee
That thing's the size of a beaver.
Tom Griswold
So big.
Christy Lee
What is that, a panther?
Josh Arnold
Thought it was something.
Christy Lee
What did Carson say? Can I. Can I. Can I pet your. And then didn't. Was it. Dabor said, well, I have to move this cat first or something.
Chick McGee
We have time for.
Ali Breen
Jason was just telling me he saw a guy with a shirt that said show me them kitties. That's great.
Chick McGee
We have time for one more letter from Ali Breen. Ally, go.
Ali Breen
Dear Ally, my wife quit her job because she was miserable and she met someone on the street who asked her if she'd ever modeled before for. She actually gave him her information and he called. And then it turns out he wants her to be an only fans model. She was like, if I could keep my identity hidden. It's kind of like a webcam girl and she's kind of into it. I'm not. What do you guys think?
Kenny Tarmac
She doesn't need that guy in order to be a webcam model, though. He just want to film you.
Ace Cosby
And she should know every person, every porn star, if you ever listen to them interviewed, says the first thing they tell new girls getting into the business. And I know this is just only fans modeling, but it applies here too. People will find out you can never stay anonymous. You. You ever.
Ali Breen
Oh, interesting.
Chick McGee
Everyone will know since you're taking pictures of your face and all.
Ace Cosby
Yeah, I mean, I guess you could get away with not. But that's. Who wants to. Wants that.
Chick McGee
There's probably.
Ali Breen
Right.
Chick McGee
There is probably some weird fetish where you never want to see the face.
Ace Cosby
Yeah, probably.
Christy Lee
Maybe the unknown sex worker bag over her head.
Ali Breen
Amazing.
Chick McGee
Would you go.
Ali Breen
There should be the masked singer, but for only fans.
Chick McGee
The mag over the head chick. You go, paper or plastic?
Christy Lee
Oh, you gotta go paper.
Chick McGee
Okay.
Christy Lee
They see through the plastic.
Ace Cosby
Well, I bet there's a. I bet there's a plastic bag finish.
Chick McGee
They tighten it, though. They tighten it at the end, Cambodia style. Oh, there we go. Yeah, there we go.
Christy Lee
You're lethal.
Chick McGee
Ali Breen is our guest. The comedian. And you working this weekend, Ally?
Ali Breen
Yes. I'll be back at the Strip in New York City and Then I'm at Gotham on Monday right after.
Chick McGee
What is the status of your condo in Florida with it? Your lease is out.
Ali Breen
I'm gonna be. Well, there's. I'm still working on it. I probably have like a few weeks left to do that. So I'll be back down there next week and then, yeah, I'll be able to probably try to start leasing it pretty soon. But it's so much fun doing DIY stuff. I've been burning a lot of brush in Florida, so if you hear about some wildfires, it's so much fun.
Chick McGee
I don't see you as much of a farm girl type doing all this stuff. I know you've admitted that you can't cook an egg.
Ali Breen
I know I'm not good at any of it. It's just so much fun to do. That's the key on Here we go. Look at who you're calling a fatty. It's not so bad.
Chick McGee
There's the kitty cat.
Christy Lee
That is a full grown panther is what that is.
Chick McGee
That's one big, big, big cat. Thank you very much, Ali. It's always a great pleasure. You'll find Ellie A L L I B R E E N and track her down and send her a letter or go see her live doing some, some great stand up. Thanks, Ali. Thanks, guys. Now. Oh, I've been talking about keeping my energy level up courtesy of Java House. We've been talking about the coffee a lot. Java House, of course, famous for their coffee and the great, it's almost, I guess you could say a new idea in coffee. The peel and pour pods.
Tom Griswold
So convenient.
Chick McGee
You don't have to put it in the machine and have it go through the rigmarole. They just take this. It's concentrated. This, for example, is the amazingly smooth cold brew Colombian medium roast. I have been drinking. I think I'm on my third hydration drink today, the Arctic Blast. And they also, of course have hot cocoa, tea, lattes, energy drinks. It's all from Java House. And the key, once again is the peel and pour pod. And they've got a couple cool things going on at Java House right now. Now, of course, it's the perfect solution for that break room at the office. And they're going to do a thing where you could get a free in office demo. Visit java house.com for the details. Click on that tab and sign up for that free in office demo. Once again, it's Javahouse.com. also use the name Bob and Tom, one big long word and get 25% off. Your order for some pods to be sent to you so you can check it out. And Java House once again, peel and pour, paws for tea, energy drinks, hydration drinks, lattes and even the famous hot cocoa. It's all coming your way from java house@javahouse.com we shall return. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.
Jessica Alsman
Want to share something, Send us an email. Bob and tomobandtom.com this is the Bob and Tom Show.
Christy Lee
Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. Josh Arnold, Kristi Lee, Pat Godwin, Jessica Halsman, Ace Cosby. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. I'm Chick. Hello, Tom.
Chick McGee
Hello, Chick McGee. It's always a great pleasure to have you here. And I am trying to find this article about. You mentioned the Botox in the, in the, in the front. Naughty for the ladies.
Tom Griswold
Actually it was filler because it actually puffs it up.
Chick McGee
Oh, maybe that's why I can't find it because I've been doing. I've been looking for Botox.
Tom Griswold
Ducts takes wrinkles out. Filler puffs things up.
Chick McGee
Okay.
Tom Griswold
Like, like Juvederm or.
Kenny Tarmac
So if it starts getting thin and I don't know, wispy, then you want to thicken it.
Tom Griswold
And I never even think about it or worry about that.
Chick McGee
I found this pitch. Have you heard of a vaccine called Desireal R?
Ace Cosby
No. What's that?
Chick McGee
It says it functions. This is. It says, ladies, ladies, if you don't want to go under the surgical knife, this is the right thing for you. This is obviously a commercial ad. I'd never heard of this before. It says it works in a similar way to the filters. Once again, it's called Desireal R. It gives ladies most intimate area, the desired firmness and elasticity.
Christy Lee
Really?
Tom Griswold
Does it go inside side? Are we talking about the walls? What are we talking about?
Chick McGee
I don't know.
Christy Lee
Walls.
Chick McGee
It says often the lady parts become dry. The walls and muscles drop, which can affect your self esteem.
Tom Griswold
This is a post menopausal thing.
Chick McGee
So.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Tom Griswold
So that would be on the interior. We're talking about the. We're talking about the flappy part.
Christy Lee
O.
Chick McGee
Both. Yes. Is there something called like Botox? Okay.
Tom Griswold
Labia filler.
Christy Lee
Okay.
Josh Arnold
It is a lot of information to.
Chick McGee
Take it at once. Got it. Can you see some doctor, Hello. I'm the vag master. Would you like this?
Christy Lee
Every day it's something new with him.
Josh Arnold
Some new voice or character.
Chick McGee
Okay, then I've got this thing about vaginal popsicles.
Tom Griswold
What?
Christy Lee
Now, wait a minute. Hang on.
Chick McGee
No. Yeah, this is. This is a good thing.
Christy Lee
Keeping something cool.
Chick McGee
I use. This is from the. A parenting site called Direct Advice for Dads. This is a list of must have things to bring your wife in the hospital as a post birth treatment. I see something called vaginal popsicles or called the ice finger. The process involves filling a condom with water and freezing it.
Ace Cosby
Yeah, yeah, Go ahead. Bring that. Bring that to your watch.
Tom Griswold
No, no, no. You want them to insert that in after you've had a baby.
Chick McGee
This is not me talking. This is this article. The post explains the so called popsicles are the perfect shape to rest in between the legs and ease the pain and swelling.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, that would be.
Chick McGee
These are not inserted.
Tom Griswold
They're not. I was going to say treating a bee sting. No.
Chick McGee
Wow.
Tom Griswold
Yeah, that would make sense.
Christy Lee
By the way, I think you could insert it though, if you had to.
Tom Griswold
No, they. They encourage you not to do that.
Chick McGee
The. The fudge sickle is a far different thing. The ice finger sounds like. Well, finally went to third with Jack Frost.
Josh Arnold
Jack Frost.
Chick McGee
Oh.
Tom Griswold
A woman would probably be saying.
Josh Arnold
She'd be saying. Yeah, he was saying it. That's why.
Chick McGee
Sorry.
Christy Lee
You know, the old fudge. Fudge sickle, if you will, is quite common during. You know what I mean?
Chick McGee
Yeah, A little.
Christy Lee
During birth.
Chick McGee
Yeah, yeah.
Josh Arnold
Little dollop will come out.
Christy Lee
Yeah.
Chick McGee
Every day. All right. Okay.
Tom Griswold
I'm so, so like, you're having a. I'll try to.
Chick McGee
I'll try to find the boat. The Botox. The Botox.
Christy Lee
That's where the saying comes from. Well, crap the bed.
Chick McGee
Okay, let's. Let's move forward here. Christie, you have one more story to wrap things up.
Tom Griswold
The Louvre, home to the Mona Lisa and other iconic works of art in Paris, closed abruptly Monday as the staff staged an impromptu strike over a surge of tourists who were left standing in long lines. Ticket agents, gallery attendants, and security refused to return to work following a morning union meeting, citing overcrowding and understaffing. After four hours of talks with managers, management, the Louvre reopened to confused and tired visitors.
Christy Lee
We're confused and tired.
Chick McGee
So they were. The. The tourists were locked out?
Tom Griswold
Yeah, for four hours.
Christy Lee
Oh, they're waiting.
Chick McGee
That's. Is that the number one tourist attraction in Paris?
Tom Griswold
Probably that. The Eiffel Tower?
Christy Lee
It's either that or the Surrender Museum, I think. Thank you.
Ace Cosby
There.
Chick McGee
Very good.
Josh Arnold
Billy's Hoagies.
Christy Lee
You got to go there. Oh, yeah.
Ace Cosby
Factory.
Christy Lee
There's where they came. They gave up over here. And it's a flag here's what I gave up over there.
Ace Cosby
White flight because of some spoiled docents.
Josh Arnold
Ugly Americans.
Ace Cosby
Probably right at work.
Tom Griswold
Probably.
Chick McGee
There's too many tourists.
Christy Lee
Too many.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Ace Cosby
Boy. I work in a museum. You know what? I'm striking because there are too many people visiting it.
Josh Arnold
How about suck it up on Worney?
Christy Lee
It's right around the 90s in Paris.
Chick McGee
I went there and they. They didn't even have any of them. Them Bob Ross paintings, you know.
Christy Lee
How about those kids with the big sad eyes? I like that.
Chick McGee
Where are they? Yeah.
Ace Cosby
Some of the loops sucks.
Christy Lee
Did you see the guy who sat on. Was it van Gogh's chair?
Ace Cosby
Yeah.
Christy Lee
Just.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Christy Lee
Smashed it right to the ground. It was just hilarious. He sat down and trying to get a picture.
Tom Griswold
God, people are idiots.
Chick McGee
Well, they can't put this stuff. It's right there. You can't. You've got to put it behind a fence or whatever or people will do.
Christy Lee
Exactly what they did.
Chick McGee
Of course, then you're going to get the guy that's going to climb the fence, like the guy that climbs in to get in with the tiger. Well, I was talking to the tiger and I realized I could go in there and pet him. And then he bit my hand off.
Christy Lee
He said it was okay.
Ace Cosby
I'd be awful that have killed the animal.
Chick McGee
We'll give you the. The van go chair story tomorrow. Plus we've got. If you're checking into the motel, watch out for the alligator. It's. It's loose and it's big. We'll tell you about all those things tomorrow. Thanks for joining us here in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom show.
Jessica Alsman
Thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom show this morning. Catch any part of the show you missed. Later Today on our YouTube channel, the United States soccer federation presents the u. S. Soccer podcast.
Chick McGee
Inside the opening 45 seconds. What a goal with that cannon of a left foot.
Christy Lee
I'll leave it at 1.
Jessica Alsman
Never miss a game.
Tom Griswold
What a start for the United States.
Christy Lee
Shot for distance. What a goal.
Jessica Alsman
Never miss a moment.
Josh Arnold
Exquisite.
Christy Lee
From the San Diego.
Chick McGee
Can he finish?
Tom Griswold
Yes, he.
Jessica Alsman
The udcast follow and listen on your favorite platform.
The BOB & TOM Show - June 18, 2025: Detailed Summary
Broadcasted from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios, this episode of "The BOB & TOM Show" delves into a variety of engaging topics, including listener interactions, sports highlights, coffee culture, scientific curiosities, and humorous relationship advice. The hosts—Chick McGee, Tom Griswold, Christy Lee, Ace Cosby, Josh Arnold, and Pat Godwin—maintain their signature blend of comedy and insightful discussion throughout the show.
The episode kicks off with the hosts responding to listener letters, fostering an interactive atmosphere. One notable segment involves a letter from James in Columbus, questioning the category of "three-letter words for body parts" as featured on "Jeopardy!"
James from Columbus writes:
“I think there are a total of 10. They only gave six answers. He has leg, arm, rib, gum, jaw, hip, lip, eye, ear, toe.”
(06:02)
The hosts enthusiastically brainstorm additional three-letter body parts, humorously debating terms like "sac" and "dong," while playfully addressing the nuances of such categories.
Another interactive segment includes a humorous discussion about professional cuddling, sparked by a listener's positive experience with a professional cuddler named Mitch Komstein.
Florida Panthers' Stanley Cup Victory
A major highlight of the episode is the celebration of the Florida Panthers securing their second consecutive Stanley Cup. The hosts congratulate the team and delve into details about their impressive performance:
Chick McGee remarks:
“Sam Reinhardt scored four of the five goals, including the cup clincher.”
(16:12)
Pat Godwin adds enthusiasm about the team's success, noting their dominance since acquiring Matthew Kachak and the coaching prowess of Paul Maurice.
WNBA Action: Caitlin Clark's Performance
The Panthers' success segues into discussions about the WNBA, specifically Caitlin Clark's standout game where she amassed 20 points, six assists, and four three-pointers, leading the Fever to a victory over the Connecticut Sun.
Tom Griswold comments:
“Doesn't he need more of a hockey name? Sam Reinhart, like Vladimir Klitschkoff or something.”
(16:20)
The hosts passionately discuss the implications of Sam Reinhart's performance and the broader impact on Canadian hockey's Stanley Cup drought.
Java House Sponsorship
The episode features a sponsorship segment by Java House, highlighting their innovative "Peel and Pour" pods—a convenient alternative to traditional brewing methods. Chick McGee enthusiastically promotes the product:
Chick McGee states:
“It's a little tiny. Let me get a different one here. It's a pod. Peel the top off, pour it in, and shazam. You've got your coffee right away.”
(14:21)
He emphasizes the ease of use and variety offered by Java House, ranging from cold brews and lattes to energy drinks and hot cocoa, making it a versatile addition to any coffee lover's routine.
Health Benefits of Coffee
Transitioning from sponsorship, Tom Griswold shares recent research linking coffee consumption to healthy aging in women, citing a study from Tufts University. The findings suggest that drinking one to two cups of caffeinated coffee daily correlates with a 14% lower risk of all-cause mortality.
Tom Griswold explains:
“Researchers at Tufts University discovered drinking one to two cups of caffeinated coffee every day was linked to a lower risk of death from all causes.”
(96:34)
The hosts discuss personal coffee preferences, debating the merits of black coffee versus flavored options, and the balance of enjoying coffee without excessive additives.
Optimal Dunking Time for Oreos
An intriguing scientific discussion revolves around the optimal time to dunk Oreos in milk, referencing a study by Utah State University's Splash Lab. The scientists determined that three seconds is the ideal duration to achieve maximum milk absorption without the cookie crumbling.
Chick McGee highlights:
“Oreos absorbed 50% of their potential liquid weight in just one second. After two, they absorbed 80% before maxing out at four seconds...”
(89:00)
The hosts humorously consider the practical applications of this finding, relating it to everyday enjoyment of Oreos and the delicate balance between soggy and crunchy textures.
Oceans and Milk Products Trivia
Furthering the scientific banter, the hosts touch upon related topics like the Hydroxy cookie, comparing it to Oreos in terms of dunking efficiency and discussing the complexities of doughnut textures and their interactions with liquids.
Cuddle Comfort Services
Christy Lee introduces the topic of professional cuddling through a listener's testimonial, highlighting the emotional and psychological benefits of human touch. The show promotes Cuddle Comfort, an organization offering services from amateur and professional cuddlers across the nation.
Christy Lee shares:
“It's important to remember that connections are important... You need to connect with someone who can offer that comfort.”
(03:56)
The discussion evolves into humorous banter about the intricacies of professional cuddling, addressing concerns about hygiene and personal boundaries, while emphasizing the therapeutic aspects of platonic touch.
Sexual Topics from Reddit
The hosts engage in a lighthearted debate over questions sourced from Reddit, specifically addressing "something sexual you'll never do again." Each host offers their own comedic take on various responses, from unconventional ideas like putting body parts in hot dog buns to more relatable scenarios involving embarrassing moments and humorous mishaps.
Tom Griswold jokes:
“What a turd that is.”
(05:34)
Ace Cosby adds:
“Jack Benny-style humor with a banana eating contest twist.”
(05:14)
The segment serves as a platform for the hosts to showcase their comedic personalities, intertwining humor with relatable relationship dilemmas.
Ally Breen's Love Troubles
Comedian Ally Breen joins the show to discuss her own relationship challenges, particularly concerning her husband's frequent travels and her way of addressing boredom through flirtation on Tinder.
Ally Breen questions:
“I've started a Tinder profile just to start flirting with women. I've met some really cool people...”
(134:21)
The hosts offer playful advice, balancing empathy with humor as they navigate the complexities of maintaining trust and excitement in long-distance relationships.
Invisible Fences for Pigs
In response to a listener's concern about a pig roaming freely near their home, the hosts humorously explore the feasibility of using invisible fences—a common solution for dogs—as a containment method for pigs.
Chick McGee ponders:
“Can pigs be put on a so-called invisible fence, which is the dog thing where the dog wears a collar and they bury the wires?”
(125:29)
The discussion leads to jokes about the intelligence of pigs and the practical challenges of securing livestock, all delivered with the show’s characteristic wit.
Hot Dog Buns and Humor
A recurring joke about the difficulty of evenly splitting hot dog buns adds a playful layer to the show, with hosts debating the practicality and humor of such a feat.
Chick McGee quips:
“So how ridiculous thinking that it was five feet is. You bastard.”
(53:56)
This light-hearted banter underscores the hosts' ability to find humor in everyday mishaps and trivial matters.
As the show progresses towards its conclusion, the hosts recap the varied topics discussed—from sports triumphs and scientific studies to heartfelt relationship advice and humorous listener interactions. They maintain a lively and engaging dynamic, ensuring that both regular listeners and newcomers find the content entertaining and relatable.
Chick McGee closes with:
“We have a lot of coffee news today, all of it good news... And we've got more letters and comedy segments with comedian Ally Breen.”
(150:05)
The episode exemplifies "The BOB & TOM Show’s" commitment to blending humor with informative content, creating a rich and enjoyable listening experience for their nationwide audience.
This comprehensive summary captures the essence of the June 18, 2025 episode of "The BOB & TOM Show," reflecting its multifaceted discussions and the hosts' engaging interplay.