The BOB & TOM Show - June 2, 2025

Summary

The BOB & TOM Show - June 2, 2025: Detailed Episode Summary

Release Date: June 2, 2025

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1. Hilarious Personal Anecdotes

The episode kicks off with Donnie Baker sharing uproarious tales about his misadventures with bodily functions, particularly focusing on his experiences with sharting. His vivid storytelling not only elicits laughs but also sets a comedic tone for the show.

• Donnie Baker (01:10): "I remember reading there's only one muscle in the whole body that has the ability to decipher between liquids, solids, and gas. And it's called a sphincter. But it don't always work."

• Tom (01:44): Repeats Donnie's humorous phrase, enhancing the comedic effect: "It was a shark."

These exchanges highlight the show's signature blend of humor and personal stories, engaging listeners with relatable yet exaggerated scenarios.

2. Sports Spotlight: Indiana Pacers' Remarkable Run

A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to the Indiana Pacers' impressive performance in the NBA playoffs. The hosts express their excitement and delve into the team's journey to the Eastern Conference Finals, marking their first appearance since 2000.

• Willie Griswold (48:33): "That's what they say. Everyone says that."

• Jeff Oskay (48:34): Adds enthusiasm: "That's what they say. Everyone says that."

The discussion covers key players, strategic moves, and the overall impact of the Pacers' success on their fanbase. The hosts also touch upon the challenges of media coverage, noting how the team's achievements often go underreported despite their hard-fought victories.

3. Listener Interaction: Sharing Funny Incidents

The show features letters from listeners, adding an interactive dimension and fostering a sense of community. One standout story involves a mishap at a wedding where Donnie's overindulgence leads to an unforgettable shart incident during the ceremony.

• Donnie Baker (01:50): "I was there at the church, up on the altar with my back to the congregation... My ass looked like a Dalmatian."

This anecdote not only delivers laughs but also resonates with listeners who appreciate the candid and humorous sharing of embarrassing moments.

4. ER Visit and Family Matters

A heartfelt segment unfolds as Tom opens up about a recent visit to the emergency room with his daughter, Finn. Despite the stressful experience, Tom maintains a light-hearted demeanor, sharing his attempt to make the situation amusing.

• Tom (17:23): "I took two regular chairs, put them together... and fell asleep in the ER."

• Willie Griswold (19:56): "Finn hasn't really been there. She hasn't been present for the funniest hospital stories."

This segment underscores the show's ability to balance humor with genuine personal experiences, offering listeners both entertainment and relatability.

5. Comedy Spotlight: Greg Warren's Special

Comedian Greg Warren makes an appearance, discussing his latest comedy special titled "The Champ." The hosts commend Greg's work, highlighting his unique comedic style that blends smart humor with exaggerated personas.

• Greg Warren (103:54): "I thought it'd be a good time for us to all learn about boomerangs."

• Tom (111:32): "If someone says hog pit, I want to meet him."

Greg's participation enriches the show's comedic landscape, providing fresh content and fostering camaraderie among the hosts and guests.

6. Engaging Listener Questions: Slang and Language

The hosts delve into the nuances of slang terms used in medical settings, particularly focusing on euphemisms for female anatomy. This educational yet humorous exploration is spiced up with interactive banter and shared personal insights.

• Tom (27:56): "Here are some of the ones I've heard over the years. My monkey."

• Christy (28:08): "Or Percy, I suppose then you sound like Sean Connery."

This segment not only informs but also entertains, showcasing the hosts' ability to discuss sensitive topics with humor and tact.

7. Unique Advertising Integration

Throughout the episode, advertisements are seamlessly woven into the conversations without disrupting the flow of content. Notably, sponsors like Silac Insurance, Raycon Earbuds, and Factor Meals are mentioned in a way that complements the show's narrative.

• Tom (30:00): "Now, this portion of the Bob and Tom show, brought to you by our friends at the Silac Insurance Company..."

• Tom (32:35): "Raycon's newest model. Better than ever."

These integrations maintain the show's dynamic energy while effectively promoting sponsors.

8. Closing Remarks and Future Teasers

As the episode nears its end, the hosts hint at upcoming segments, including additional sports news and guest appearances. This anticipation keeps listeners engaged and eager for future episodes.

• Tom (43:06): "This is a snappy two-track Malone saying hello, everybody."

• Josh Arnold (84:34): "Pat Godwin is now..."

The conclusion reinforces the show's ongoing commitment to delivering a mix of comedy, personal stories, and timely news updates.

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Final Thoughts:

This episode of The BOB & TOM Show exemplifies the show's enduring appeal through its blend of humor, personal anecdotes, and engaging discussions. From Donnie Baker's hilarious shart stories to the Indiana Pacers' sports triumphs, listeners are treated to a rich tapestry of content that is both entertaining and relatable. The seamless integration of advertisements and interactive segments further enhance the listening experience, making it a standout episode in the series.

Transcript

[Tom]

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[Josh]

Customer service to help you when you need it. So your dollar goes a long way.

[Tom]

Visit progressive.com to see if you could.

[Josh]

Save on car insurance, Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. Potential savings will vary. Not available in all states or situation.

[Christy]

It's the Bob and Tom Show.

[Donnie Baker]

Hey man, it's Donnie Baker. Even though I never officially passed 10th grade health class, I still probably know more about the human autonomy than anyone I know of. I remember reading there's only one muscle in the whole body that has the ability to decipher between liquids, solids and gas. And it's called a sphincter. But it don't always work. I found out the hard one day after a school lunch. Bean burritos and root beer don't mix. I swear to God, they don't. I felt a rumble and let my sphincter make the call. Uh oh, it was a shark. It was a shark.

[Tom]

It was a shark.

[Donnie Baker]

You know, a fart so wet your socks get soaked?

[Tom]

It was a shark.

[Donnie Baker]

Uh oh, that was another one.

[Willie Griswold]

And he's not wearing another round.

[Donnie Baker]

I remember the second time I sharted. This is Scottie Winkler's third wedding, but the first one in a church. So we all had to wear these pearly white tuxedos. Trouble was, I went overboard at the bachelor party the night before. I did more shots of goat schlogers than a horny leprechaun. Got drunk, ate more chili dogs at 3am from a street vendor. It served me bad relish. So the next day, man, I'm there at the church, up on the altar with my back to the congregation. When it came time for me to pass a ring, well, I passed something else with it. My ass looked like a Dalmatian.

[Tom]

It was a shot.

[Donnie Baker]

When she said, I do, I said, I already did.

[Tom]

It was a shot.

[Donnie Baker]

Connie, I told you not to let the flower girl stand behind me.

[Willie Griswold]

And he's not wearing underwear.

[Pat Godwin]

Something's about to blow. What it is, he does not know.

[Donnie Baker]

I asked this question of my ass.

[Willie Griswold]

Is it a liquid or a gas?

[Pat Godwin]

It was both.

[Donnie Baker]

I ever tell you about the shark? I had my senior year at the Semi State when I wrestled Matt Bucket. We were the White Knights. Everybody knows it. We wore these Snow white singlet uniforms. I'd Spent four days cutting weight with Ex Flags. Cause I'd gone to Ribfest the week before. Next thing I know, I'd get pucked in a move I invented called the tank cover. That's where his face got trapped between my legs like a scissor lock. And in that condition, your opponent can only breathe the air you give him. He begged me to let loose, and so I did.

[Tom]

It was a sh.

[Donnie Baker]

I gave Tuckett freckles.

[Willie Griswold]

It was a shark.

[Donnie Baker]

My ass looked like a map of Michigan.

[Tom]

It was a shark. Sorry, man.

[Donnie Baker]

I was trying to crop dust, not fertilize.

[Tom]

And he's not wearing underwear.

[Donnie Baker]

I swear to God.

[Willie Griswold]

There's a nasty stink back there.

[Donnie Baker]

We got it on tape.

[Josh]

Something stinking up the air.

[Tom]

It was a shart.

[Josh]

Boy, I sure hope you're not starting your week off with a shart.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, me, too.

[Josh]

That's a rough beginning. Beginning to. Any.

[Tom]

Even ending your week? I guess ending your week with a shark may be a good story behind it. At least.

[Josh]

You go ahead. Yeah, exactly. But, hey, it's the Bob and Tom show. Live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Christy Lee's in the Psylac Insurance Company news desk.

[Jeff Oskay]

Howdy.

[Josh]

Pat Godwin's across the way with the organ and the guitar.

[Pat Godwin]

Hello.

[Josh]

Jeff Oskay's there.

[Christy]

Is this thing on?

[Josh]

Willie Griswold's over there.

[Willie Griswold]

Hey, it's on.

[Josh]

There's Ace Cosby. Hey, I'm Josh Arnold. And Tom. How the heck are you?

[Ace Cosby]

Sleepy.

[Tom]

Thank you.

[Josh]

Sleepy?

[Tom]

Let's be honest.

[Jeff Oskay]

Long weekend.

[Tom]

Oh, yeah. Yeah. But I'm okay.

[Josh]

You can take a nap. We got nine people in here.

[Tom]

Okay, good. I may do that. I thought I'd start off with a pronunciation test. Oh, for. Christy Lee, I don't know you.

[Jeff Oskay]

Whatever you printed, I. Go ahead.

[Tom]

Should be one word on there.

[Jeff Oskay]

No.

[Tom]

Oh, okay. Did it not print okay? Perfect. Okay. That's the kind of week we're going to have.

[Josh]

A technical Shark.

[Tom]

Never mind. We'll do that later. Well, derails everything I had. What else is new? Christy, have a good weekend?

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, I had a great weekend. Watched a lot of basketball. How about those Pacers, huh?

[Willie Griswold]

Let's go, man.

[Jeff Oskay]

Real excited ceremony for the Eastern Conference finals. Brought tears to my eyes.

[Willie Griswold]

Great.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah. Because it's been a long time since we've seen those hats worn by our players. So it was cool.

[Tom]

And it's the Hicks versus the Hicks this time.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Instead of the Hicks versus the Knicks. With respect to the way the.

[Jeff Oskay]

The Thunder.

[Tom]

Oklahoma City Thunder There we go. Now, Christie, this is a quiz for you. Since you had to watch basketball, you got to get used to pronouncing this name. Give it a shot.

[Jeff Oskay]

That's not what this is.

[Tom]

Oh, perfect.

[Josh]

Someone.

[Tom]

Someone really needs to pay attention. Never mind.

[Josh]

All right. Wait, weren't you in charge of printing this thing?

[Tom]

Yeah, I printed it. I hit print and I.

[Willie Griswold]

Is it an athlete's name that you want us to pronounce? Is that what's going on?

[Tom]

Well, I wanted Christy to give it a shot.

[Josh]

Yeah, she will. Okay, you can't get mad at all of us for.

[Tom]

No, no, no, I'm not mad at you. I just. The way he rushed in, I thought it was. Let me try it again. Here we go. Let's see if this works. Jeffrey, you out there?

[Willie Griswold]

Yeah, Jeff's out there.

[Tom]

Okay, I've hit print. It should be coming out any minute now.

[Pat Godwin]

Here we go.

[Tom]

What's happening? Is it working? No.

[Willie Griswold]

This feels like we have to do a project in school, and it requires a lot of tech, but you have a sub that day, and she doesn't know how the projector works.

[Josh]

Coming out.

[Willie Griswold]

It's coming out the tech car.

[Tom]

Oh, there we go. Okay.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, he's running over right now.

[Tom]

Definitely. It doesn't have a school gestation of 12 minutes. Okay, now, Christy, given this is the name you're gonna have to get used to, because I know you're a Pacer fan.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Tom]

The Thunder.

[Willie Griswold]

Oh, I see that. There's a hyphen in it, so I know what it is.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, Shay Gil. Gilly. Geos. Alexander.

[Willie Griswold]

I think it's just Shay Gilgis. Alexander.

[Jeff Oskay]

Shay Gilgis.

[Willie Griswold]

Okay, but with a lot of these guys, with Giannis Tentacumpo, you can't say his name. You call him the Greek freak. No big deal. For this is sga, you just say sga.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Willie Griswold]

Sounds like a company.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Yeah, that's cool.

[Jeff Oskay]

Sga. Shay Gilius. Alexander.

[Pat Godwin]

Julius Alexander.

[Tom]

Get it?

[Pat Godwin]

It's like the.

[Tom]

Now you know how I feel.

[Josh]

You're wrong in doing that.

[Willie Griswold]

It's like the Saquan Shay sounds like. Say you see.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Willie Griswold]

Yeah. Do it again.

[Pat Godwin]

Do it again, do it again.

[Jeff Oskay]

What am I missing?

[Tom]

Do it again.

[Jeff Oskay]

Shay. Jillius Alexander.

[Pat Godwin]

Julius Alexander.

[Willie Griswold]

It's a hard G. Hard Gil. Shay Gilges, the young Canadian Gil.

[Tom]

Yeah. Okay.

[Jeff Oskay]

Fish, this sucks.

[Tom]

Hockey. You'd be jizzing all over this.

[Josh]

That's not true. I would at least want to mention it, but I. I wouldn't. And basketball means nothing to me, and I just have to live in it.

[Willie Griswold]

I didn't say anything. That's all I want to say. I didn't say anything.

[Josh]

You've already said four things.

[Willie Griswold]

I didn't start the conversation. I'm saying. I just. I. I knew that I was going to get a little flack for wearing my Pacers. Happy and excited about my team being there.

[Pat Godwin]

That's cool.

[Willie Griswold]

Gilgis.

[Jeff Oskay]

Gilgis.

[Tom]

What a great name, though. What a great name.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Tom]

And hyphenate.

[Jeff Oskay]

I know nothing about the Oklahoma City Thunder. Nothing.

[Josh]

That's how you're supposed to be.

[Jeff Oskay]

Never seen them play.

[Tom]

You're just supposed to hate them. You're just supposed to hate them because they're not your team.

[Jeff Oskay]

All right.

[Tom]

Perhaps get on the court and start screaming at players like the parents of some. Never mind. Well, it'll be exciting. The NBA season coming to a great end. Getting ready for the great ending.

[Jeff Oskay]

When's the first game? Thursday.

[Willie Griswold]

Thursday?

[Tom]

Yeah. Yeah, it's. And it's 2, 2 and 2, 2, 2, 1, 1 one again. Mm.

[Jeff Oskay]

Okay, that's the seven.

[Tom]

All right. Well, I do have the odds here, I think. Yeah, it looks like the Thunder is a minus 750.

[Willie Griswold]

They are favored. They're deeply favored.

[Tom]

That means if. If you bet a , you win 250. Is that the deal?

[Willie Griswold]

I don't know.

[Tom]

Exactly.

[Willie Griswold]

I don't know if you know this. I'm not. Not good at numbers. Historically bad. Even if it's about gambling and weed, I still can't do the math.

[Tom]

Really? Yeah.

[Willie Griswold]

I gotta call a guy.

[Jeff Oskay]

Okay, well, can you bet like the Thunder in five games or.

[Willie Griswold]

You can bet pretty much anything. I can get really specific. Thunder in five game. SGA with the final shot is left shoes untied. You can get real weird.

[Jeff Oskay]

So that's. We can call Shay. Sga.

[Willie Griswold]

Yeah, sga.

[Jeff Oskay]

I like that.

[Josh]

What's the over under on me throwing my coffee mug for that class?

[Pat Godwin]

I got 10 minutes.

[Willie Griswold]

Is it the amount of time? Yeah.

[Greg Warren]

Is it?

[Willie Griswold]

How many coffee cups are you gonna throw?

[Jeff Oskay]

Is there cream in the coffee you do this weekend? If you didn't watch basketball, what'd you do?

[Josh]

What do you mean if?

[Tom]

I didn't?

[Josh]

Why, of course I didn't watch basketball.

[Pat Godwin]

I'm with you.

[Tom]

Is there any hockey on?

[Josh]

No, no. That starts Thursday.

[Tom]

Okay.

[Willie Griswold]

Josh, I saw.

[Josh]

I'm not.

[Tom]

I'm not a.

[Josh]

He almost cost.

[Jeff Oskay]

Go ahead.

[Josh]

I'm not a jerk. I'm playing to be. I actually really like that people are excited and stuff. I don't get with hockey. You guys always Bring it up in an attempt to cheer Josh up. I don't ever bring it up.

[Tom]

I understand that. This. This hockey finals, the. The. What is it called? Oh, the. Not the Great Cup. Oh, it's. Oh, it's the Stanley Cup. They're going to shoot the bucket and put it in the net.

[Josh]

Yeah, see? And then he does this.

[Willie Griswold]

I don't know.

[Josh]

I don't know who told him that or where that comes from, but that's.

[Tom]

That's the essence of hockey. You shoot the bucket.

[Josh]

So couldn't I just go, oh, I'm going to shoot the ball and put it in the net and say that about basketball.

[Tom]

But there are many ways to do it. You got your three point you in hockey, you jackass.

[Josh]

You know what? This is my shart. Talking to Tom is like sharting my pants. It's the worst way to start off your week.

[Willie Griswold]

Can I tell you, you calling him a jackass. Best way to start my week. I'm a big fan of that, man.

[Josh]

Well, one's man. One man shark is another man's comedy.

[Tom]

There you go.

[Willie Griswold]

Shakespeare said that's early.

[Tom]

Established. Established that. Well, we'll catch up with everybody. What they did, what they're going to do, and what is. What is meaningless. What is meaningless in life. And the whole point is. Now, let's see, what. Monday, Tuesday. On Tuesday. Last Tuesday, we called something, and it appears to have happened.

[Jeff Oskay]

What?

[Tom]

Well, I'm gonna. It's something involving sports.

[Josh]

Oh.

[Tom]

It was a prediction on this show, and it appears to have come true. Very excited about that. That'll be. That'll be coming up in the news. Very, very exciting. Also, we have. We heard from Chick.

[Jeff Oskay]

Chick is on vacation in Aruba, floating in the ocean. The last picture I saw on Instagram.

[Willie Griswold]

Good man.

[Josh]

Face up.

[Tom]

Yeah, that is. I was gonna say, very fair.

[Pat Godwin]

Pulled him out of the water.

[Tom]

Chick hates. He. He. He hates the sun, hates the beach.

[Willie Griswold]

Yeah, he looks relaxed also. What are you talking about? When you're at the beach, you're wearing that assassin suit that you wear. It doesn't look like you're enjoying yourself.

[Tom]

Out there or not.

[Willie Griswold]

Kind of just forced to be out there.

[Pat Godwin]

Beekeeper's hat on.

[Tom]

Yeah, I've got him covered in stuff, but now we'll find out what's going on with him. Also, we have an unusual event in the world of sports involving cannabis, of all things. And also, Christy, when you go out to a restaurant.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yes, sir.

[Tom]

Do you ask the server, the waiter.

[Jeff Oskay]

Or the waitress, what do you recommend?

[Tom]

Do you ever do that.

[Jeff Oskay]

I do do that.

[Tom]

Well, there is a survey about that and maybe you'll change your ways.

[Jeff Oskay]

Don't you do that as well?

[Tom]

On occasion.

[Josh]

Now, isn't that like one of the big server's biggest pet peeves?

[Tom]

Yes.

[Willie Griswold]

He doesn't ask them what food to get. He asked them deep personal questions. Oh, I like that tattoo. When did your father die? Stuff like that. He goes way too far in there. What kind of car do you drive?

[Pat Godwin]

This one from Tom, at a dinner. You have very unusual looks. He said that to the work. He meant exotic. I'm not kidding.

[Willie Griswold]

He said that at dinner. He said, it's my older brother, but still he said it.

[Josh]

Well, those kind of have unusual look, buddy.

[Willie Griswold]

He's looking weirder by the day.

[Jeff Oskay]

He's like a musician.

[Willie Griswold]

He looks like he sells meth at a pawn shop right now. It's crazy.

[Tom]

He has purple hair. I'm very proud.

[Josh]

Oh, it's purple now. Okay.

[Jeff Oskay]

Changes every day. We were talking about that on Saturday. It's like mood hair. Like, every day it changes color.

[Willie Griswold]

It does look good. It looks intentional.

[Tom]

He's got a look.

[Josh]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Willie Griswold]

I'm almost jealous of that. I feel like I look kind of plain in a way. Identity crisis. He knows who he is, dude.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Willie Griswold]

Chest hair out.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Willie Griswold]

Gold chain on.

[Tom]

What?

[Willie Griswold]

Oh, yeah, man.

[Pat Godwin]

Sam.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Willie Griswold]

I wasn't just saying the pawn shop thing. Meth to be mean. It's a real look for him.

[Tom]

Stands out in a crowd. Look at him and go, that guy looked in the mirror and said, I'm gonna do that. That kind of thing.

[Jeff Oskay]

I thought he looked very handsome.

[Willie Griswold]

He did look handsome. It's put together. It's a look, man.

[Tom]

It is a look. All right, now, this portion of the Bob and Tom show, brought to you by our friends at the Silac Insurance Company. Well, if you've been paying any attention, there was things at the end of the newscast where they talk about the Dow Jones and the stock market's been way up and then way down and then way down and then way up and. You get the picture. It's. It's called volatility. And you can counter that. You can not have to worry about that if you have something called an annuity when you retire down the road, it's nice to know that you're going to be getting that check every month, no matter what's happening in the world of the stock market, et cetera, et cetera. Annuities are designed to protect your retirement. That's where the SILAC folks come in. They are the annuities experts. So with annuity that's not going to happen. Like I said, the money's going to keep coming and you can't outlive your money. That's very important. Find out what SILAC annuities can do for you. Some restrictions apply. Learn more by going to silacins.com by the way, there's another really easy way to just get some information about annuities. Pick up your phone and call £250. Hit that hashtag. If you thing they call it a pound sign. It's got like 40 names now. £250. Then say the keywords lifetime income. That's £250 lifetime income. Once again, pound sign 250 lifetime income. And get some information from the SILAC insurance company, your retirement plan on it. And when it comes to getting that check live on it, that's from the Silac Insurance Company. Now. Also coming up, we have nice news from the NFL on the happy side of things. A little bit of romance. And what's the best place to find a romantic partner? This story actually had the words meet cute in the headline. I deleted it for fear that between that and basketball talk, Josh might hang himself. I took it out for you. It's all coming up. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Jeff Oskay]

This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. You chose to hit play on this podcast today.

[Tom]

Smart Choice.

[Jeff Oskay]

Progressive loves to help people make smart choices. That's why they offer a tool called Auto Quote Explorer that allows you to compare your Progressive Car Insurance quote with rates from other companies so you save time on the research and can enjoy saving when you choose the best rate for you. Give it a try after this [e-mail] Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates not.

[Tom]

Available in all states or situations.

[Jeff Oskay]

Prices vary based on how you buy.

[Josh]

Hey, it's the Bob and Tom show live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Think O'Reilly Auto Parts for all your car care needs. Get the parts and service you need fast from the professional parts people at O'Reilly Auto Parts. Having a heck of. Oh, excellent, Tom.

[Tom]

Excellent. I really nailed that one.

[Josh]

Yes, we're having a a great time already.

[Jeff Oskay]

Christy Le here, Of course we are.

[Josh]

Pat Godwin, Jeff O. Willie G. There's Ace Cosby. I'm Josh. Tom, I know you're a little sleepy, but it doesn't show. You're on fire.

[Tom]

Just got out of rhythm. Really this weekend? Yeah, Everything's fine. But one of my girls ended up in the ER on Friday night.

[Josh]

Oh.

[Tom]

At one point, I took two regular chairs, put them together. Now follow me on this. And then put my feet in the ground and put my head on this and fell asleep in the er. Yeah. Yeah. But, you know, can you follow me here?

[Willie Griswold]

Not really.

[Jeff Oskay]

Not really. Why'd you have to put two chairs together?

[Christy]

You made, like, a bench.

[Tom]

Yeah, I kind of made a bench because I was so exhausted.

[Pat Godwin]

I think you're burying the lead. Is everything okay? You're burying.

[Willie Griswold]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Oh, yeah, everything's fine.

[Josh]

It's B E R. And your feet.

[Jeff Oskay]

Were on the ground. So you were sitting in a chair.

[Tom]

Yeah, so my feet are on the ground like this.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Then I put two, and then I went all the way back.

[Josh]

Okay.

[Tom]

All right.

[Josh]

Yeah. So you did your best to relax.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

Okay.

[Tom]

Otherwise we were in there for quite some time.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Tom]

But, yeah, at. Everything's fine. At one point, Finn had to have a. What do they call it? A. What's that scanning thing they do?

[Jeff Oskay]

The sonic ultrasound.

[Tom]

Ultrasound, yes. I almost said sonic hair.

[Jeff Oskay]

That's a toothbrush Ultrasound.

[Tom]

There are two different people. They're doing a great job. And ever. If you've ever seen one of these ultrasounds, Josh, imagine if you're in a submarine in an ocean made of mud, and you're looking out the window, and they're going, oh, you can see the weather. And I'm going, no, I see absolutely nothing.

[Jeff Oskay]

These people, they're trained.

[Josh]

Yeah. I've had them done.

[Tom]

They're geniuses. I don't know how they do it.

[Josh]

Yeah, yeah, exactly. You just go, okay, yeah, they know what they're looking for.

[Tom]

But Finn's 12, and we were in there in that part of the hospital for, like, I don't know, 30 minutes or so. And as they're wheeling her out, I said to the guy, well, at least she's not pregnant.

[Josh]

That's funny.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, my God.

[Josh]

By the way, how old is Finn?

[Willie Griswold]

She's 12.

[Josh]

Yeah. So it's funny.

[Tom]

Got a big laugh.

[Willie Griswold]

I couldn't believe he made that joke. I couldn't believe.

[Josh]

Did Finn laugh? I bet she was morphine.

[Tom]

No, no, she was on morphine.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, geez.

[Willie Griswold]

Finn hasn't really been there. She hasn't been present for the funniest hospital Stories. One time, me, my dad, and Finn were all on an elevator. She had to get an operation that morning. It was very scary. But she was tough and she was brave. And we're in the elevator going down. And this really sweet tech just goes, look at this, sweetheart. Look at all the people that love you. Mom, dad. And then gestures at my dad. Even grandpa's here this morning.

[Tom]

Oh, yeah, these jokes, these jokes are funny.

[Willie Griswold]

Yeah, that joke was funny. Unlike the 12 year old pregnant joke. Mike, you're her dad. It should be offensive to you.

[Josh]

No, he said, thank goodness she's not.

[Tom]

At least she's not.

[Josh]

He was relieved.

[Tom]

The guy. The guy. No, the guy. He knew who I was.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Tom]

He got a little bit of a charge out of it.

[Jeff Oskay]

Did he?

[Tom]

And by the way, there's an art form and I think there should be. There should be a competition. Steering a hospital bed. Sure. Through a hospital with all those lines and stuff on it, you know, the IVs and everything. So it's unbelievable. Yeah. This. You could do a version of, of the Indy 500 with these guys. Yeah, they're. They're all.

[Josh]

God bless them all.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

I had a dinner party yesterday and no one went to the er, so I call that a success.

[Willie Griswold]

Nice. Oh, that is.

[Josh]

Yes.

[Christy]

First time for everything.

[Tom]

Well, Mike, Mark from our staff came in and he is. His wife is a brilliant dancer.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah. Choreographer.

[Tom]

And she. And they have their big annual thing at this huge auditorium. Three ambulance calls, there's a successful show. I told you, don't push her off the stage. But that went well. In any event, all is well. My sleep schedule's a little bit.

[Josh]

Oh, it sounds. Yeah, for good reason. Man, oh man.

[Tom]

I don't think they were too upset with me when, at the, at the er when they were given a fin. A morphine. A couple times I said, hey, can I get a taste of that?

[Josh]

You know, usually when I give her her fries, I take two or three. How about we do the same with the old.

[Tom]

Well, that's. I remember I had to have that a couple times in my life during various surgeries. Morphine, they give you this clicker gizmo.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Tom]

And here's. If you just imagine you've got this clicker in your hand and when you click it, it gives you a dose. So when they give it to you.

[Willie Griswold]

You go click, click, click, click, click clack, click, click.

[Tom]

It has a governor on it. Otherwise I'd be living under a bridge going, I used to be somebody.

[Josh]

You were clicking it like you knew the answer on Jeopardy.

[Tom]

And it was thanks to all the great folks that work in the hospital. Terrific, terrific. People, people. Now, where were we? Oh, we are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. And this is The Bob and Tom Show. We do have some letters here to bring the guys up to speed. We've been talking about this. About driving naked. Is that what your letters about, Christie?

[Jeff Oskay]

No, mine's not about driving naked. But I do have a letter.

[Tom]

Mine's not about driving naked either. But this just. This is. This ties right in.

[Josh]

All right.

[Tom]

This comes to us from Paul in Alabama. He writes, my cousin was stationed at Alameda Air Force Base near San Francisco. I was living in Muscle Shoals at the time. He asked me to fly out and ride with him back home. To bring all his stuff back before he flew to Okinawa. So one day before I got there, someone stole his car stereo. We spent the next five days driving across the country with no radio. Now listen to this. So let's think about it. There's two guys.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Tom]

One badass guy's military guy. He and his cousin spent five days singing show tunes. We got every song we knew, including the Bugs Bunny theme song. No nudity in the car. But my cousin did jump out to take a pee in the side of the road. And I drove off as a joke as he was exposing his. Quote, Little weenie.

[Josh]

Oh, that old gag.

[Tom]

Ah, yes. That's. That's all. That's a classic. Thank you very much. But that's. That would be really rough. No radio show tunes with your buddy.

[Josh]

It may have ended up being really fun, but. Yes.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

You don't like just driving with quiet?

[Josh]

I used to think my. Every time. Every now and again, my dad would do that. And I was like, what psychopath doesn't turn on the radio? And I've. I've started to do it a little.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, I do it a lot.

[Willie Griswold]

I've been in the car like a half hour away from a show. Like, geez, I should turn it some music on. I feel like a psycho right now.

[Jeff Oskay]

I like the quiet.

[Tom]

I mean, Godwin and I have been on a bunch of road trips lately. I don't think we ever turned the right. We might have turned the radio on once or twice.

[Pat Godwin]

We don't. Shut up stories.

[Josh]

Cope and Crosby over there.

[Tom]

Yeah. No. In the tradition of. Stop looking. In the tradition of Socrates and Plato, we are. We are discussing. Wait a minute. That's all about man love.

[Josh]

I was gonna say.

[Willie Griswold]

Any other traditions?

[Tom]

You pick somebody a little more hetero.

[Josh]

Tom, you've raised somebody's ire. Old Joe quite upset with you. He's Joe from St. Joe.

[Jeff Oskay]

Hey, Joe.

[Willie Griswold]

Oh, cool.

[Tom]

St. Joe. Michigan.

[Josh]

Indiana is what it says. Tom, you arrogant prick.

[Tom]

Right.

[Willie Griswold]

That's how it opens. I Love Joe from St. Joe Rules.

[Josh]

Tom goes right, the boys from Bakersfield, California. Do you have any idea who he's talking about so far based on in the last week? You really trashed these gentlemen.

[Willie Griswold]

The boys from Bakersfield.

[Josh]

Korn created a new music genre in 1994 with their debut release. The guitarists Head and Monkey play seven string guitars and Fieldy the bass player, a five string bass.

[Tom]

So it's like having an amp set at 11. It's. It's one better.

[Josh]

They have 15 studio albums, 15 releases made it to the top 10 of the top 253 music videos. They debuted their Adidas tracksuits. Their last record was in 2023 and they are still touring. How can you besmirch them?

[Tom]

No, I wasn't besmirching them. I'm sure I was besmirching the guy that got the corn tattoo on his neck as a prize. We did. There was a contest and that's what the winner got. And the guy that won it actually did it.

[Josh]

I think it's bad.

[Willie Griswold]

Yeah, it's pretty cool.

[Tom]

Well, I.

[Josh]

He could be a grandfather.

[Tom]

Yeah, that's the thing. When they find him. When they find him lying. Lying face down like chick in the ocean. Hey, it's the corn guy.

[Pat Godwin]

No, I, I. Clapton is actually going on tour with them this summer.

[Josh]

Oh, really? Corn and.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, it's called Cream corn.

[Tom]

There we go.

[Willie Griswold]

There it is, folks. Make it a great one. Everybody.

[Tom]

I forget the name of. There was a comedian I really liked that did a whole series of fake tours.

[Pat Godwin]

Petty and Cash.

[Tom]

Petty Cash, exactly. Yeah, those are funny. Yeah. San Francisco based guy. I'll think of his name in a second.

[Josh]

I remember. And there was a David Spade would occasionally do the one he did in the 90s. It was the Beach Boys and UB40.

[Tom]

And now it would be. You be 80 now.

[Josh]

UB40.

[Tom]

I'm sorry. Any other letters over there?

[Jeff Oskay]

I have a letter.

[Tom]

Okay, go ahead.

[Jeff Oskay]

This is from Ken in Iowa. Just had the pleasure of seeing the Black Moods last night in the little town of Earlham, Iowa.

[Josh]

Nice.

[Jeff Oskay]

They were part of the Levitt Amp Music series. I've heard them on your show. Could not pass up seeing them live. They were great. Love your show, Ken.

[Tom]

We're making arrangements to get the boys back in here. They are so good. We were talking about slang terms for the wiener or vagina. Thank you very much. Thanks for the fill in my little stuff. And I was talking to a friend of mine about this. The topic came up with regard to ladies coming into the emergency room. Oh, and he worked in a urban setting. And buckle up.

[Willie Griswold]

You just looked around.

[Jeff Oskay]

Here we go.

[Greg Warren]

Everybody around.

[Josh]

He looked around, doesn't care. Aces sitting right there. A big city.

[Tom]

The most often the term was used was down there.

[Josh]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom]

This comes to us from an ER nurse Lori, thank you very much. Here are some of the ones I've heard over the years.

[Josh]

Oh, for. For down there.

[Tom]

Yes. My monkey.

[Josh]

Okay.

[Tom]

Seems kind of a new. Have you ever heard that one, Christy? No. My monkey be itching. Perhaps. Hey, Willie.

[Willie Griswold]

It's gonna be a long list.

[Jeff Oskay]

Somebody didn't give you the one that.

[Willie Griswold]

There could be two. There could be two terms.

[Tom]

This.

[Willie Griswold]

And it'd be too long of a.

[Josh]

List for us to be reading.

[Tom]

My purse. There we go.

[Christy]

Purse.

[Tom]

Have you heard that? Yeah.

[Josh]

Sweet, sweet purse.

[Tom]

Or Percy, I suppose then you sound like Sean Connery. Percy, I'd like to show you.

[Josh]

Show you my Percy Sledge.

[Jeff Oskay]

I always thought that the purse would be your breast because a lot of women keep a lot of stuff in their bra or. Yeah.

[Josh]

Were you Miss Kitty?

[Jeff Oskay]

No, I'm not. Especially in some urban areas.

[Josh]

I gotcha.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Christy]

You had younger kids. Did they ever watch Thomas the Train?

[Willie Griswold]

Oh, yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, my son did.

[Christy]

There is a train on there named Percy, which for two and three year olds trying to pronounce their favorite train, it comes out like. I feel like someone did that on purpose because there was nothing worse than. They had a train thing at the museum where we used to go. And my son, his favorite train was Percy, and he wanted to play with Percy, and he was there to see Percy and was very loud about it. And I'm like, no, that's the train's name. He just isn't good at enunciating.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, exactly.

[Willie Griswold]

This one's so much bigger than the Percy at home. Stuff like that.

[Tom]

That's gonna go through that tunnel. That looks like it might be a memory. That's the one. Delivery juice. Oh, we continue with our list from Lori. Yeah. In the ER he's working. One lady referred to it as my rose.

[Josh]

Ah. All right.

[Pat Godwin]

I've heard flower tulips.

[Josh]

Yeah, it's technically four, so this.

[Tom]

Brick'S already down there. Never mind. Coochie. Sure.

[Pat Godwin]

Very common. Yeah. That's a cute, cute one. Yeah.

[Tom]

But I mean, in a medical setting.

[Pat Godwin]

Medical.

[Tom]

No, doctor, it's my coochie.

[Josh]

Well, it depends. I mean, hey, if something's really going wrong, say whatever you need to to get the point across.

[Tom]

And that Laurie says Nurse Laurie finally says, I rarely hear the word vagina. I occasionally do hear vajayjay. And wooha makes.

[Willie Griswold]

Makes those technical name for Covid way funnier.

[Josh]

Oh, that's the technical name.

[Willie Griswold]

As I said it, I realized it wasn't. I realized it was kind of the.

[Josh]

One that we weren't supposed to be the opposite of.

[Willie Griswold]

But you did sometimes because it was kind of fun.

[Tom]

So if you're a working nurse, first of all, God bless you. I met up. I met some just great nurses over the weekend.

[Josh]

Yes.

[Tom]

With Finn helping out, just tremendous people. If you ever have any interesting terms you've heard on duty, we'd love to hear from you. Christy, what have you got?

[Jeff Oskay]

Brad from Michigan said we missed one of the best ones. Slang for lady parts. Ham wallet.

[Josh]

I've heard them all. I don't like that one because anytime somebody mentions it, I get it confused with my actual ham wallet.

[Tom]

We prefer the ones that maybe the ladies should tell us rather than the ones. Yeah, the ones the guys know. Hey, Tuna lagoon. Get it. You know. Okay, this started.

[Jeff Oskay]

You started with that list.

[Tom]

I know. This is. This. I like hearing from an actual female nurse that has heard. It started with my buddy Bill and the terms he would hear down at the. At the er. Once again, in an urban area, you gotta stop talking. That's a fact. I can't. I'm sure that they're interesting ER slang in the country.

[Josh]

Country, sure. Rural slang versus urban slang.

[Tom]

Yeah, sure.

[Josh]

Some of it, actually. It's always fun when they come together.

[Tom]

Yeah. You mean a hillbilly and somebody from Check My Heart?

[Josh]

I don't mean it's check my hog pit when slim.

[Jeff Oskay]

What?

[Pat Godwin]

Check my hog pit.

[Josh]

Yeah, that'd be a really.

[Pat Godwin]

Hog pit.

[Jeff Oskay]

I thought you said something else.

[Tom]

If. If someone says hog pit, I want to meet him, they.

[Pat Godwin]

That is turns into a ham wal.

[Willie Griswold]

There you go.

[Tom]

Wow. All right, now I want to remind you, the best way to listen to this show, of course, is on those Raycon earbuds. And let's see. How far away are we from Father's Day?

[Jeff Oskay]

It's June 15, a week from Sunday.

[Tom]

Okay, here we go. Raycon. Raycon's newest model. Better than ever. 32 hour battery life. That is amazing. And of course, they are designed to stay in your ear. That's the key with the Raycon earbuds. They got a bunch of different colors. You can even have the ones that are so bright, people know that you're listening when you're walking the dog. They walk up and start talking to you. You have to point your ear and go, something interesting going on in here. It's the Raycon earbuds. They have active noise cancellation like I said, vibrant colors including royal blue, blush violet and more. And they have a 30 day happiness guarantee. So check out the Raycon earbuds. Right now they've got a 15% off special if you go to buyraycon.com tom I love my Raycon earbuds. And by the way, once again, 15% off their best selling everyday earbuds [e-mail] Tom and they're designed with I never can remember the name. Was it gel tips?

[Jeff Oskay]

Yes. Very good.

[Tom]

So they're adjustable so they come with a bunch of ones. Get the ones that fit your ears. They're not gonna fall out. So you're not gonna be in the parking lot looking for those little white things that fell out of your ears. These are half the price of those and they're much better. So give them a shot. Go to buyraycon.com tom and remember what a great Father's Day gift that will be. Buyraycon.com Tom Coming up in sports, we'll catch up with the NBA. When does the hockey thing start, Josh?

[Josh]

I think Thursday.

[Tom]

Okay. We'll give that lip service Wednesday or Thursday. Lip service meaning we don't care.

[Christy]

Yeah.

[Tom]

These are the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios and this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Ace Cosby]

Thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom show this morning. Even though we're not too much to look at, you can also so watch the show on our YouTube channel.

[Tom]

Make this your best season yet with nutritious 2 minute meals from Factor. Eating well has never been this easy. Just heat up and enjoy, giving you more time to do what you want.

[Jeff Oskay]

Get outside instead of prepping and cooking indoors, Factor Meals arrive fresh and ready to eat. Perfect for any active lifestyle. And with 45 weekly menu options, you can pick gourmet meals that fit your goals. Choose from calorie, Smart, protein plus keto and more.

[Tom]

Factor powers your day with satisfying breakfasts on the go, lunches, premium dinners and guilt free snacks and desserts. It's easy to savor more this spring. Factor Meals Pack in the flavor with none of the fuss. Get [e-mail] bobandtom50off and use the code bobandtom50off to get 50% off off plus free shipping. On your first box. The code is Bob and Tom50OFF@Factor Meals.com Bobandom50OFF for 50 off plus free shipping minds coming.

[Josh]

Hey, it's your love bunny inviting you back to the Bob and Tom Show.

[Tom]

Yeah, yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Here for your love buck bunny.

[Jeff Oskay]

Then you need to say rabbit, rabbit, rabbit, because it's the first.

[Josh]

Oh, I thought you could only say it on the 1st.

[Jeff Oskay]

Well, we weren't here on the 1st.

[Josh]

That's why I didn't say it. They were at the O'Reilly Auto Part Studios.

[Tom]

You're with the love bunny.

[Jeff Oskay]

Love bunny?

[Josh]

It's your love bunny. It's not the love bunny.

[Tom]

It's your love bunny.

[Willie Griswold]

It's possessive by nature.

[Tom]

I have a feeling that really wouldn't have taken off even in the 50s.

[Josh]

I did. Jack Black says it in Shallow How? And I always like to say it. There's Pat Godwin.

[Tom]

Hello.

[Josh]

Oh, there's Jeff. Okay.

[Pat Godwin]

Hello.

[Josh]

You're right about the love bunny thing, by the way. Tom, I just got that. Who are you, Willie J. Yeah. Good to see you, Ace Cosby. I'm Josh. There's Tom.

[Tom]

You ever try saying the love bunny to any of those lady friends of yours, Ace? You ever go, I'm the love bunny?

[Josh]

I'm not?

[Tom]

I, I, I didn't think so.

[Pat Godwin]

I like him.

[Tom]

You think so?

[Josh]

It's cute, isn't it?

[Tom]

Yeah. It sounds like you're fertile.

[Josh]

Well, again, if you go for that 1950s.

[Tom]

There were so many great, especially nighttime DJs from the 50s with, with great names. Wolfman Jack being among the greatest. And sure. Who's the guy that put on the, all the, all the shows? Cleveland rock and roll. Alan Freed.

[Josh]

And he had Cousin Brucey. Remember Cousin Bruce?

[Jeff Oskay]

Cousin Bruce there.

[Tom]

Yeah. A lot of, A lot of greats, but I don't think Love Bunny was one of them.

[Josh]

No, no, no, it wasn't. You know, I really made a mistake.

[Christy]

I'm good.

[Josh]

Yeah, we're gonna be already here for a while.

[Willie Griswold]

The jackrabbit's great, and it seems more aggressive than the love bunny in a hot way.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Yeah. And didn't they franchise the name? Wasn't there, like, Jack Somebody and a big Jack? It was like. I think there was like 50 of them. Yeah, I think there were a bunch of them out there.

[Josh]

Oh, really?

[Tom]

This is Big J. Remember that guy?

[Willie Griswold]

I don't.

[Josh]

No.

[Pat Godwin]

I mean, I don't think anybody does.

[Josh]

It's.

[Christy]

Was he an alien?

[Josh]

Your leader.

[Pat Godwin]

Came out of nowhere.

[Tom]

That was, that was my favorite.

[Jeff Oskay]

Jack, your leader, Was he on the radio?

[Tom]

Yeah, of course.

[Josh]

Somebody remembers, but we certainly don't. It would be impossible for us to remember that Jocko.

[Tom]

Henderson, the ace from outer space.

[Josh]

Oh, man, those guys.

[Christy]

I'd listen to that all day.

[Willie Griswold]

There are people in a retirement. Some retirement home somewhere going, finally, Tom's talking about the ace from outer space.

[Tom]

That's one of the greatest one. It's Jocko Anderson, the ace from outer space.

[Greg Warren]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

Was he on in Cleveland?

[Tom]

No. Oh, but just. He's one of those famous guys. There's a. There's a. Like a hall of fame to those great guys.

[Josh]

Sure. There should be a museum, baby.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Willie Griswold]

A lot of daguerreotypes in there.

[Tom]

Well, I think those guys were very talented and sure.

[Josh]

What those guys do. Before radio was invented. If you had that on a hill. Yeah. Shouting, hey, good morning to you.

[Tom]

I got weather on the 10. Come back. I'm the ace from outer space.

[Josh]

No, Ace.

[Tom]

No, no, that's.

[Josh]

Hey, no, no.

[Tom]

That's very funny, sir.

[Josh]

No, it's A's this hour, brought to you by Thornton the Blacksmith. You can chew your horses anytime.

[Tom]

Well, we have some other letters to get to, but I thought, Pat, perhaps a song. You have a new song I really like. Oh, I don't think Jeffrey's heard. I don't think Willie G. Has heard it.

[Jeff Oskay]

Which song is so beautiful?

[Tom]

Summer is here yes, the weather has really been really nice Lots of places.

[Pat Godwin]

It'S gonna get nicer.

[Tom]

Can I introduce it like I'm the Moondog?

[Pat Godwin]

Absolutely.

[Josh]

Please.

[Tom]

The man who invented rock and roll. Ladies and gentlemen, Alan Freed. He's the Moondog.

[Pat Godwin]

Summer is here and I'm cutting the grass Filling the pool so happy winter has passed Planting flowers, digging a garden Bought some sod Put a new yard in I'm so happy Summer is here.

[Willie Griswold]

It'S nice, man, it's pretty.

[Pat Godwin]

Building a deck Stained the hardwood floors Got in my new hot tub without any shorts I'm gonna start up the grill. Charcoal's the best but someone I know is pillow pissed and perplexed That's Jackie, the manager of my apartment complex. Summer is here and I have to move somewhere else.

[Tom]

Rockin Robin with a little bit of Patty G here. Coming up, Porky Chadwick. He's the Daddy O of radio. He's on the way, baby.

[Pat Godwin]

I like that.

[Tom]

You're doing great, Patty G. The fastest tongue in the West. That's why the ladies love him.

[Pat Godwin]

All right, you can stop.

[Jeff Oskay]

Please don't ever do that again.

[Josh]

Turned you on too much.

[Tom]

No, turn me on too much. Goodbye.

[Pat Godwin]

Goodbye, erections.

[Jeff Oskay]

I gotta chill.

[Tom]

It's a new song for Patty G. It's called Goodbye Erections. I think it's about tearing down buildings. I'm not so sure this is the daddy o radio.

[Willie Griswold]

This is one of my favorite things you do is that when you're very tired, instead of taking a step back, you overcompensate so much. You're doing voice voices, you're riffing, you're reading off the computer. You're looking up the daddy of radio.

[Tom]

Oh, I know the daddy of radio.

[Pat Godwin]

Is that a real thing?

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Josh]

I love.

[Pat Godwin]

I like this.

[Josh]

Was anybody the Ayatollah of rock and roll?

[Tom]

You know their actions?

[Josh]

Yeah, I always love that.

[Tom]

Yeah, yeah, that. That came later.

[Josh]

Sure.

[Tom]

I mean, when the world was introduced. We're talking Ayatollah in America in the 50s. You were planning something the same. That wasn't a. You're. You're looking way down the road. Okay, well, did you have another letter or did I.

[Jeff Oskay]

No, I don't.

[Tom]

Okay.

[Jeff Oskay]

I don't know. Do you?

[Christy]

I have a letter.

[Tom]

Oh, go ahead.

[Willie Griswold]

Hey, Jeff.

[Christy]

I was listening to the show Friday and you guys were talking about leaving a present in the cup on a golf course after a sexual encounter.

[Josh]

Oh, yeah. You, you dirt bag.

[Christy]

Let me out of that. A good friend of mine and I worked at a golf course. One morning, after a big tournament, we split up to handle our tasks. One of us would rake the bunkers, the other one would change the cups. After about an hour, I got a call from my friend. You'll never believe what I just found in the cup. What did you find? He found a cup that someone had defecated it.

[Josh]

I didn't believe him.

[Christy]

I went over and sure enough, someone had definitely pooped in the cup. We had to take it back to the shop, clean it out, then put it back in the ground. We still laugh about it to this day. Love the show. Thanks for the laughs, Donovan.

[Tom]

Thanks, Donovan. Oh, man. How mad would you be? How bad of a shot do you have to hit to go? All right. I mean, I've thrown my clubs into a lake, sure. But I've never said. Okay, that's it for this game. I'm gonna go crap in the hole.

[Christy]

That would be the day I quit my job is when I found that, no joke. I'm gonna go work at Dairy Queen in a cup of Dairy Queen.

[Tom]

No, but it says. But you can. You can make the cone look like pile of crap. Just spin it just the right way. Okay. Well, this is a snappy two track Malone saying hello, everybody.

[Josh]

Two track.

[Willie Griswold]

This is kidding out of here.

[Tom]

Back in those days, they really you're lucky to have stereo right. Age mononucleosis with the nuclear sounds of hot radio.

[Josh]

Hey, mano, we gotta talk to you, man. We've done some air checks, you know. Look, we can call you kissing disease.

[Jeff Oskay]

At least.

[Tom]

That is coming up. It's Jimmy vinyl with spinning your wax. Wait a minute. I just mixed my metaphor.

[Josh]

Jimmy vinyl's not trying too hard.

[Willie Griswold]

It's like Johnny Football. You could be a little more creative, right?

[Tom]

Were they. When did they become vinyl, by the way? Now that I think about it, weren't they plastic in the beginning?

[Josh]

Oh, geez.

[Pat Godwin]

In the beginning. Was it in 78s? Were acetates?

[Jeff Oskay]

I have no idea. Yeah, they were thick.

[Tom]

Yeah, they would bust. They were like stiff. Stiff records, ladies and gentlemen.

[Pat Godwin]

Actual label.

[Tom]

Yeah, I know. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Part Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Ace Cosby]

Want to share a letter or comment? Our email is Bob and tom. Bob and tom.com.

[Tom]

I am Michael Rosenbaum. I am Tom Welling.

[Christy]

Welcome to Talk Bill, where it's fun to talk about Smallville.

[Greg Warren]

We're going to be talking to sometimes.

[Tom]

Guest stars, but are you liking the.

[Josh]

Direction Lois is going in?

[Tom]

Yeah. Cause I'm getting more screen time. It's good, but mostly it's just me and Tom remembering. I think we all feel like there was a scene missing here. You got me, Tom. Let's revisit it. Let's look at it. See what we remember. See what we remember. I had never been around anything like that before.

[Ace Cosby]

I mean, it was so fun.

[Tom]

Talk vil. Talk ville. I just had a flashback.

[Greg Warren]

Follow and listen on your favorite platform.

[Willie Griswold]

Let's get into it.

[Josh]

Hi there. It's the Bob and Tom show live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Christy Lee sitting at the Silac Insurance Company news desk.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yes, sir.

[Josh]

Pat Godwin's across the way. Hello, there's Jeff Osk.

[Christy]

Hi, buddy.

[Josh]

Willie G joins us this morning.

[Willie Griswold]

Hey, good morning.

[Josh]

Ace Cosby's there. I'm Josh Arnold. And later this morning, Tom, we have Greg Warren doing the Warren Report, sponsored by Champion Windows. Visit championsave now dot com.

[Tom]

No, you. You misidentified me. I'm your leader.

[Josh]

Oh, I'm sorry.

[Tom]

Big Jack.

[Josh]

Big Jack, our leader.

[Pat Godwin]

Is there audio of that?

[Tom]

We can find some. Your leader, big job. I'd have to dig it up.

[Josh]

Why would we want lesser audio?

[Christy]

We have the math.

[Pat Godwin]

That is true.

[Tom]

I really can't do it. I can't do it justice.

[Josh]

Yoli.

[Tom]

A friend of mine used to.

[Jeff Oskay]

That character from The Star wars movie.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, Jar Jar Jar Binks.

[Jeff Oskay]

That's who you sound like.

[Tom]

Really?

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Tom]

I'm the only one that liked Jar Jar Binks.

[Willie Griswold]

I like him.

[Tom]

Oh, thank you. Good. People get all uptight about Jar Jar.

[Josh]

Yeah. I don't hate him.

[Tom]

And he got. He got politically corrected out of the movies.

[Josh]

Well, he was also just not. He. Really? Yes. There was some political correctness going on, but for the most part, people just didn't like him. They thought he was annoying and unfunny.

[Tom]

But that's part of life.

[Josh]

Yes. If any. We prove that every morning.

[Tom]

No, but I also. It's one of those things. To me, it's like the Apu character in the Simpsons. They got rid of him and then they got rid of everyone of that.

[Josh]

I agree.

[Tom]

So they say, oh, that's offending you. So we're going to eliminate those people from the universe.

[Josh]

Yeah. Do we not remember the 12 episodes about his culture and learning? You know what I mean?

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Josh]

So now we're just going to hide.

[Tom]

So the accent, the Jar Jar, that whole civilization gone because it was politically incorrect.

[Josh]

Well, I don't know that we have to worry that much about the Naboo.

[Tom]

Yeah. Although they wiped out the Naboo, there.

[Willie Griswold]

Were so many things you could put protest. The first thing you're getting involved in is space Jamaicans.

[Pat Godwin]

Fake space Jamaicans.

[Tom]

I think it's analogous to what happened, of course, to the people. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm getting the shut up sign.

[Josh]

But yeah, why not get somebody of Indian heritage to do Apu's voice? You know, just go that route.

[Tom]

Yeah. And there is a component of reality in what he did for a living.

[Josh]

That's exactly right. Working hard 247 still to this day. And you're exactly right. The guy I.

[Tom]

So we choose to. They eliminate it and there go eliminating the entire culture from one open biker.

[Josh]

Was bullied growing up and now that's gone.

[Willie Griswold]

It's the open miker is a friend of the show.

[Josh]

I know. He's actually so nice.

[Greg Warren]

Great comedian.

[Josh]

Back then he was an open mic.

[Tom]

He's become. He's become Jive time Johnny with the.

[Josh]

Hits, which is really.

[Willie Griswold]

He and Hank Azaria did a whole sit down. It's. Yeah, it's really interesting. They talked about it.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, did they.

[Josh]

Needed to be discussed. Sure. Yeah.

[Tom]

But I think the result was everything's eliminated. Okay, let's. Let's move forward here. You want to touch on a little bit of sports, Willie? Yeah. Big win for the Pacers.

[Willie Griswold]

Yeah, let's do that first. Right. The Indiana Pacers defeated the New York Knicks to advance to their first NBA Final since 2000. Game 6 ended with the Pacers celebrating a 125, 108 victory over the Knicks on Saturday night night for a 4:2 series win. This is just the second time in franchise history that the Pacers will play for the championship. Pascal Siakam won the Larry Bird Trophy as the Eastern Conference Finals mvp.

[Josh]

Rock em Seockum, they call it.

[Willie Griswold]

That's what they say. Everyone says that. The announcers say. No, they don't say it.

[Josh]

That's.

[Willie Griswold]

I was trying to have fun with you.

[Tom]

Now, can you do the sound effect of the Rockham sock and robot head knocked off?

[Josh]

Not as well as Chick, but I can try.

[Tom]

Go ahead. There's something wrong with that.

[Josh]

I liked it.

[Willie Griswold]

I thought it was pretty good.

[Tom]

You got to get a little more Augusto in there.

[Josh]

Next time you just do it.

[Tom]

I'd much rather have you embarrass yourself.

[Josh]

I've never seen him. I've never seen a puppeteer yell at his puppets. What an act, though.

[Tom]

That's a hell of an act, General.

[Willie Griswold]

He's like a magician who cuts off the assistant's leg and go, that was your fault.

[Greg Warren]

You know that, right?

[Tom]

I'd like to see if there's a gauge somewhere where the. The amount of cheering. A gauge? The amount of cheering when someone hits a three pointer, like 10ft in back of the three point line.

[Willie Griswold]

Did you see the last shot that Tyrese took put in? It was so cool. They're already up by 17 and Tyrese is at half court and he just throws one up and it goes in. And I laughed. It was so funny that it went in and he took that shot.

[Tom]

It's great. There's just something about it. No matter. You just have to scream. You're watching by yourself. It's. Oh, sorry, I just woke up the dog. So great stuff. So some great basketball on the way. We'll see what happens. The general feeling among the, the, the critics, if you will, is that the Pacers don't have a chance.

[Jeff Oskay]

Right. That's the.

[Josh]

Oh, I love when that happens. I love when a team has something to prove.

[Willie Griswold]

It's the whole playoffs. It would be insane. You would watch the playoffs and they're beating the Bucks and it's just going, oh, yeah, the Bucks, they didn't do anything good tonight. Tonight they're never talking about how well the Pacers do.

[Jeff Oskay]

You know what? You're right.

[Willie Griswold]

They've been an underdog. This whole series, it's. It's insane. It's so exciting. I'm so. I feel. I feel like I'm 14 again.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah. Every game it's always the other team they talk about. They never talk about how good the Pacers are.

[Tom]

Yeah. On a different note, Reggie said goodbye.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah. That was a tear jerker.

[Tom]

The broadcast rights of going to.

[Jeff Oskay]

Going to NBC.

[Tom]

Yeah. So someone will pick up Reggie, I'm sure.

[Jeff Oskay]

And I love that Rick Carlisle comment about it's basketball in 49 other states but in Indiana.

[Tom]

That was cool. Have you ever seen if. If we ever have a Halloween party and Rick Carlisle gets to come. He could be Jim Carrey.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Put a wig on him. They have exactly the same face.

[Willie Griswold]

Yeah. They look similar.

[Tom]

Man. It is really. There's. I thought of that and I went on. Went on Googled and there's like 50,000 things about it.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, really?

[Tom]

Yeah. Comparing pictures.

[Willie Griswold]

I do wish that. That the coaches. The coaches wear like what I'm wearing right now. Like a pullover thing. Now they all look like they're about to go work out. I wish they were in suits again.

[Jeff Oskay]

I do too.

[Josh]

They're not.

[Jeff Oskay]

No.

[Willie Griswold]

Since when The NBA went in the bubble in 2020. Remember that?

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Willie Griswold]

All the coaches just started wearing team gear, I think kind of as a way to kind of sell that sort of gear. And they haven't worn suits ever since. They all look like they just finished a workout or they're going to get coffee after. Yo.

[Josh]

It was super cool that they all wore suits. Yeah.

[Willie Griswold]

It's. I like it because when you get angry and you wearing a suit, it looks awesome.

[Tom]

Yeah. Is any coach as angry as basketball coaches? They. They just look so pissed.

[Willie Griswold]

Maybe they're just more forward facing. The lighting's better. You can see their face really Well.

[Josh]

I think I'd be angry too if I had to watch basketball all the time.

[Pat Godwin]

Just going crazy.

[Tom]

Once again. Once again.

[Josh]

I grew up in St. Louis. We didn't have an NBA team. I mean I. I know there are still plenty of basketball fans there, but I just didn't care at all.

[Willie Griswold]

That's actually why Bobby Knight threw that chair. He just hated basketball so much. Never wanted to be there. Get me out of here.

[Josh]

I've always just wanted.

[Willie Griswold]

These championships mean nothing to me.

[Tom]

Then in the fantasy dreams, he goes, hit it. And it cuts to the. It cuts to the pep band and they kick in with some great song. A little dream sequence.

[Jeff Oskay]

Do you think the NBA is going to take a look at that in the line of shooting that the Knicks kept doing, kneeing people in the balls.

[Josh]

Oh, boy.

[Jeff Oskay]

Come on.

[Josh]

Is there anything more dangerous than Christie being somewhat informed?

[Willie Griswold]

Having a little bit analysis of the game, Josh. It's actually, it's a. It's a video of one 7 foot guy kneeing like a 6, 8 guy just directly in the balls. I think you.

[Josh]

Because he's. Is it. Was it one of those things where he's tall and that stuff's just gonna happen?

[Willie Griswold]

It could just be because he's tall, but it's the same two players twice in a row and it looks very intentional. That's why I think you'd enjoy it because you watch the guy jump and then look at his knee. Like, I gotta aim this.

[Tom]

Yeah, I'm semi informed as Christy. And she's right. There's absolutely that. You can just see the guy going, I'm going to knee him in the ball.

[Willie Griswold]

And then. Miles Turner is so good at his job, he has the presence of mind to stick around and try to block the shot he did. It's not until he's landing that he's like, oh, my.

[Josh]

And if you're walking by in a jazz club and it says, tonight only Miles Turner don't you walk in. Oh, yeah, that sounds like the greatest jazz music.

[Willie Griswold]

Oh, yeah. He's got four saxophones. He wears them on a belt like Blues Traveler.

[Josh]

These are very heavy.

[Tom]

This next song is my tribute to Miles Davis. I'm gonna not face the audience. Okay. Play brew. Go down. Okay. Coming up, we have more sporting news. And we. We called this next story. I am so pleased. This involves a friend of the show, Connor Daly, race car driver, handsome young man, and something happened to him that we were talking about last week. And now our little theory on this appears to have come true. It's very, very exciting. Right now, I want to talk about the official coffee of the Bob and Tom Show. Of course, I'm talking about Java House. Java House, by the way, had a car in the Indy 500. And the Java House also has a bunch of stuff right here. In fact, let me see. Oh, here we go. Right here. Next to me, I've got a. What have we decided we're calling these things? Ramekins. Pods. Pods.

[Josh]

They're called Peel and Poor Pods. Java House kind of decided that, asked us to say it a while ago.

[Willie Griswold]

What are we gonna call them?

[Tom]

So the Java House. My idea. The Java House. Ramekin isn't gonna take off.

[Josh]

It isn't.

[Tom]

Okay. This is a pod and you don't have to put it in a machine. You just peel this part off here and then you can pour it into the water temperature of your choice. Perhaps a hot coffee, a hot tea, which is what I'm having right now. Or you could do one of their energy drinks or maybe a hydration drink even. Of course, the famous hot cocoa. Java House revolutionizing the office cost coffee room, if you will. And the home coffee area, probably the kitchen unnecessarily. I'm sure there's some guy out there that has a hot water machine in his bathroom for brushing his teeth and getting a quick Java House first thing in the morning. Java House is the solution for your office break room. We've done it here at the Bob and Tom show at our studios. We love it. You can do it too. One of my buddies, I was walking my dog the day came up to me. He said, hey, I got turned on to Java House by you. I love that. It's really great. I've got it at my house and at my office. Visit java house.com and click on the Java House for your office tab and sign up for a free in office demonstration. That is really cool. Java House.com Once again, go to Java House for your office. Click on that thing when you get there and sign up for that free in office demo. And be sure to ask for the channel code in case you've got got someone on your staff who can you bring in your marshmallows? Yes, I did have coffee like the adults. No.

[Willie Griswold]

So you don't want to call the product what it's actually called but you do want to berate the product in an ad read.

[Tom]

Yes.

[Josh]

No, I actually making fun of me because I like the hot cocoa.

[Willie Griswold]

It's delicious. We all love the hot cocoa.

[Tom]

I haven't tried it yet. Maybe I should do that.

[Josh]

Yeah, please.

[Pat Godwin]

But Josh wants to marry.

[Josh]

Loves me and I love it. My dad's dead. No one can object.

[Tom]

I'd like to say hello to you young broadcasters. How not to read an endorsement advertisement. We'll have to edit most of this out. It's Java House. The coffee's great and so is the cocoa. And I'll have to give it a try. Coming up, we have a great story about our friend Connor Daly. And in the world of endorsements, this is really, really great and fun, fun news. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Part Studios. This is the Bob and Tom show. We go.

[Josh]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom show live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Christy Lee's there.

[Tom]

Hello.

[Josh]

Jess Hooker has kicked Pat Godwin out.

[Willie Griswold]

Nice.

[Josh]

And Pat is now.

[Willie Griswold]

Can you hear me back here?

[Josh]

He's in his music room. My room.

[Tom]

There's Jeff Oskay, formerly the Nuremberg Room.

[Josh]

Willie G's across the way.

[Willie Griswold]

Stop saying that. One for a reason.

[Josh]

There's Ace Cosby. I'm Josh Arnold. Two reasons. One is it's factually incorrect.

[Jeff Oskay]

That's right.

[Tom]

I think we established that.

[Josh]

It was actually. What the.

[Tom]

I forget.

[Josh]

It was something awful.

[Tom]

It was awful. Yeah. Very bad. How's it going in there, Pat? Pretty good. What's your temperature in there?

[Pat Godwin]

About 61.

[Tom]

Oh. Oh, Fahrenheit.

[Jeff Oskay]

That's where all the air conditioning went.

[Tom]

I was going to say.

[Pat Godwin]

I may.

[Tom]

I may switch with you.

[J]

You look great in there. The light looks great. Everything looks really great in there.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, the lighting is really nice.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, wow.

[Josh]

I like what it does to your penis.

[Willie Griswold]

You can't see my penis, can you?

[Josh]

Well, I have a different camera. Sometimes I come in and install my own.

[Pat Godwin]

You turn down the crack cam.

[Tom]

Well, let's see. How can I relate this next story? This involves fluids in that area. How about that?

[Jeff Oskay]

What?

[Tom]

Yeah, we had a story last week involving a race car driver, Connor Daly, friend of the show. Oh, nice guy.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Tom]

What, Connors? What, about 35 years old?

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Fun loving dude and a terrific driver. And finished top 10. Was it? In any event, there was an issue. There was a slight delay in the running of the 109th Indianapolis 500, and they were in their cars waiting and they're not allowed to get out of their cars at that point. And they were waiting to start the race. And Conor spoke about it. And I believe we have the audio right here. I legitimately urinated in my race car before the race even started. Before the race even started.

[Willie Griswold]

Started.

[Tom]

People ask me like, when did you do it? I was like, we didn't even start. I. We sat in there for 30 minutes. Was it because you had to go.

[J]

Or was it excitement?

[Greg Warren]

No, I had to go really bad.

[Tom]

It was. I don't know if it's the diabetes or I'm just getting older, but Elio should know. He's like halfway to 100. I don't know if that happens. Referencing elio Castro turning 50.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, he did finish 10th in the Indy 500.

[Tom]

Okay, now, Willie, do you have the Update over?

[Willie Griswold]

Yeah. IndyCar driver Connor Daly has reportedly signed a deal with an adult diaper company dependent.

[Josh]

And we laughed at you, Tom, for even suggesting this would happen.

[Tom]

And then Ace corrected us. I didn't realize the Depends people changed the name. To what? Ace?

[Josh]

Depend.

[Tom]

Depend.

[Josh]

I think it's always been Depend. We've just bastardized it.

[Willie Griswold]

Really?

[Josh]

I think so.

[Willie Griswold]

I thought it was a typo. My bad. It says Depend on the sheet.

[Josh]

Oh, no, no, no. You're good, man.

[Tom]

I thought they. I thought it was Depends.

[Josh]

Sure, it was Depends. No kidding.

[Tom]

And then it was. The Depends is also better for jokes.

[Josh]

Sure. You know, it sounds better.

[Tom]

Well, yeah, he wears Depend.

[Josh]

Doesn't sound as good.

[Tom]

Yeah, but. And when I forget the exact nature of the joke, but it ended with are you going to do so and so Depends?

[Josh]

Right, right, right.

[Tom]

Okay, okay.

[Jeff Oskay]

But it says the name was previously Depends, but it's now they have officially changed it to Depend.

[Josh]

What Tom wrote says that or what you. You've actually found.

[Jeff Oskay]

I just found it on.

[Josh]

Okay.

[Tom]

I planted it. I went to my AI consultant.

[Josh]

Well, actually, I just heard that they're going to change it to HBO Depend.

[Willie Griswold]

They just can't pick a name.

[Tom]

I still. Now, when that came out, we. When they changed HBO to Max, I said, what are they doing? Why on earth would you take a great brand like that? And. And then now they've changed back, so we'll see. I don't know how many races is. Connor's gonna have them as their sponsor, but it's a great idea.

[Josh]

Yeah, sure, it's a. Yeah.

[Tom]

To get something a little more kind of down to earth and practical. A lot of the stuff is peer to peer advertising. I don't even know what it stands for. Do you know what the NTT. What that stands for?

[Jeff Oskay]

The NTT IndyCar Series.

[Tom]

Yeah. What's NTT stand for? I hate to nitpick. Thank you. See what I mean? If it was the Depends Indy 500, you'd know what the hell was talking about. All right. Anyone want to agree with me before?

[Josh]

No, I. Yeah, but I said you're twisting. Well, you're not. You. No, no. You are twisting.

[Jeff Oskay]

And you.

[Josh]

You twisted yourself up.

[Willie Griswold]

Yeah. It's really hard to talk to you.

[Josh]

Sometimes, not communicate well and then go, how come you guys aren't three people? Why are you responding to this nonsense?

[Jeff Oskay]

MDT is the Nippon Telegraph and Telephone Corporation.

[Willie Griswold]

Everybody knows that.

[Jeff Oskay]

Sure, Nippon. I know, I'm Japanese.

[Josh]

Yeah, I was gonna say using that all the time.

[Tom]

Yeah, but that's what they. What is. That's peer to peer advertising. They're not advertising to us. They're advertising to other companies or something. Now, do you think that the only fans Community. There would be a place to market diapers. Horn. In a race car.

[Josh]

In a race car.

[Tom]

No, I mean, if. Well, depend. If it were, say, Danica Patrick.

[Josh]

Yes.

[Tom]

Yeah, those would go for some serious.

[Josh]

Sure. Somebody out there might be really attracted to Connor and want his soiled adult diaper.

[Jeff Oskay]

What is it about your brain that makes you think things?

[Tom]

I'm like, Josh, I don't like to see people leave money on the table. Okay. Anything else going on in the world of sports of interest?

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Willie Griswold]

Let's get some football talk on. Scott Hansen has officially confirmed that he will return as the host of NFL Red zone for the 2025 season. The beloved personality shared the news in a social media post that read, 100 days from now equals NFL red zone.

[Josh]

They call them mmm bop.

[Willie Griswold]

And for those wondering, yes, I will be there. We have a lot of touchdowns to watch together.

[Josh]

Willie Hansen must have been right in your.

[Willie Griswold]

Oh, dude wheelhouse. I mean, that is like.

[Josh]

You were the same age, weren't you?

[Willie Griswold]

I was. I was like 8 when that song came out.

[Josh]

So you, like, were like. Were you talking to your brothers going, we can be the next Hansen?

[Willie Griswold]

We never had that conversation. We also, we all played music, and dad had a no brother boy bands rule when we were kids.

[Tom]

Really?

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Willie Griswold]

He said it was a little hokey.

[Tom]

Yeah, I did not want that. What? First of all, there's already a band called the Griswolds.

[Josh]

Oh, no kidding.

[Jeff Oskay]

Leaving money on the Toledo.

[Tom]

Well, you know, all right.

[Willie Griswold]

We all had our own projects. I would say Mezzo Static. My band was the most successful. I don't want to break. My 8th grade band did beat my older brother's band at the high school Battle of the Bands. So no big deal. He hated me.

[Josh]

That's so awesome.

[Willie Griswold]

I wasn't even supposed to be there. I was in middle school, dude. But we had two guys that were freshmen. It was. My band was shockingly.

[Jeff Oskay]

My band was very good.

[Josh]

Thanks. Did you guys ever put anything out?

[Willie Griswold]

Yeah, we have two singles we recorded. We got second place at the JCC Battle of the Band in a row.

[J]

I need to hear.

[Josh]

Seriously. Send it to me.

[Willie Griswold]

I'll send it to you.

[Josh]

I love stuff like that.

[Willie Griswold]

Well, and he recorded it with Alan, so. It's way too good. It's shockingly good.

[Tom]

I probably have some of that we can dig up.

[Willie Griswold]

I hadn't gone through puberty yet, and the song that I was singing, it was a little bit low. So it's me trying to sing lower than I can.

[Josh]

Awesome.

[Willie Griswold]

And then I get to the chorus and I just sound like a beautiful little girl just singing my little heart out. Yeah, this is it. This was Carousel.

[Josh]

Oh, dude, I'm already not in.

[Tom]

Hey, hey, hey, hey. Talking up the dj. This is one of my sons. He's doing the singing.

[Josh]

Ladies and gentlemen.

[Tom]

It's a static.

[Willie Griswold]

The lyrics are, I think. Come in after this.

[Jeff Oskay]

I can't believe you let him have this long of an intro.

[Tom]

Alan produced it, not me.

[Willie Griswold]

Oh, this is. You grabbed it for Rejoin Music.

[Tom]

Oh, this is One day.

[Willie Griswold]

This is. If you want, I can just sing it.

[Tom]

Go ahead.

[Willie Griswold]

Yeah, no, that was a joke, you guys. I'm not gonna karaoke this. It was. It's unbelievable. But keeps. Now we're going into the chorus, so. See, now I messed up. Here we go.

[Tom]

Just keep.

[Willie Griswold]

When I see you. Here's a breakdown. And this is when we kind of kick it into overdrive.

[Josh]

Yeah, yeah, I like this.

[Tom]

There's the bridge.

[Willie Griswold]

Looking at you, I don't know what to do. Like swinging on. On a carousel.

[Tom]

Right?

[Willie Griswold]

That's why it's called Carousel.

[Josh]

But nobody swings on a carousel. They just.

[Tom]

Again, I. I should have taken over the production.

[Willie Griswold]

You don't want to look into our lyrics too much. These were all love songs. We never touched a girl. I'm pretty sure in this one, I say, I want to give you a hug. Cuz I was nervous about saying, I want to give you a kiss. I said, I want to give you a hug. Admit my love, G. Not totally sure.

[Josh]

But I think I'm supposed to lick your belly button. When do we be on each other to have a baby?

[Willie Griswold]

Also, in seventh grade, I was chubby. I had long hair. I was not beating the gay allegations that were being thrown at me every day. Our band was called Mezzo Static and everyone called us Metro. Word that we don't say anymore. It was brutal, man.

[Josh]

You mean jealous people were saying those things.

[Greg Warren]

I will.

[Willie Griswold]

I will say that they were jealous. But you. When you watch movies when you're a kid, you're like, oh, we got to be in a band to get girls. That's not cool till, like junior year of high school. When you're in seventh grade, you're just hanging out with all dudes all the time, playing guitar. Your friends make fun of you so much. Leaving football practice to go to band practice. Oh, my gosh.

[Tom]

Although I do want to hear your song. When do we Pee in each other to make a baby? I remember I came out of elementary school sex ed with Ms. Custer, who by the way was 90 at Mercer School, and that's how I thought it worked.

[Willie Griswold]

You thought you peed in there?

[Tom]

Yeah, I mean. I mean, hey, look, they show you, you know, the pee maker and then the other thing only comes out of there, you know? Yeah, I told you that story. They used to. Remember those. They used to have those stacked maps. It would be hard to. How do I describe this? Like, five curtain rods and there was a map on each one. Did you ever have those? They'd pull the map down and you'd go back to. You could pull that one down. Well, that's what they had. And Ms. Custer, who was this very old lady. I'm, you know, from the Hymen Intact School of sex education.

[Jeff Oskay]

She an old maid?

[Tom]

Yeah. And then when she pulled down the one that had the erect male, that was too much for me and my buddy Bobby.

[Josh]

Oh, sure. Yeah.

[Tom]

And I'm not kidding when I say Bobby is now a very distinguished college professor, so I will not use his last name. And because he's within shouting range, we were both asked to leave because we couldn't take it serious, of course, because Ms. Custer's up there with a pointer and we're thinking, okay, well, hello, everybody, for just joining us, this is the Bob and Tom show coming to you from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Willie G. Is in here. We have Mr. Oscar over there. Did you get your beard all trimmed up? You look really handsome.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Christy]

My son graduated over the weekend, so I played myself up a little.

[Tom]

High school. High school graduation.

[Greg Warren]

Yeah.

[Tom]

All right. Now what is he into?

[Christy]

No clue. Like Japanese stuff? I don't know.

[Josh]

I like.

[Christy]

What do you call that stuff? Anime.

[Josh]

Okay. Yeah.

[Willie Griswold]

Manga, if it's printed, yeah.

[Christy]

Oh, he has a lot of the.

[Josh]

Benga or Hente if he's whacking to it.

[Tom]

Well, isn't that the one where they pixelate all the mom.

[Willie Griswold]

No. So that's just like the real life people.

[Greg Warren]

The.

[Willie Griswold]

The hentai, I believe, is usually cartoon looking. And it gets crazy. The cleavage gets really big. They have tentacles sometimes.

[Tom]

Oh, yeah, yeah. I'm out.

[Willie Griswold]

My cousin.

[Josh]

Not for me.

[Willie Griswold]

My cousin I was living with, he's into anime. And I'd be like, hanging out, just, like walking outside and have some show and the girls just have the biggest boobs you'd ever see. And I comment on it. He goes, this is actually, you know, one of the more. One of them. This is actually more modest than the other ones. And I'm going, what are you talking about?

[Josh]

Yeah, there's a New trend. And we saw one, a girl last week who. Of actual real girls wanting to look like the anime character portions. Yeah, Remember that? Was she onlyfans star or something?

[Tom]

Wow.

[Jeff Oskay]

You looked her up, remember?

[Josh]

And you saw.

[Tom]

Oh, man, that.

[Josh]

That's not for me.

[Tom]

Also with us in the studio, Ms. Jessica Hooker is right over there.

[J]

Hi.

[Tom]

Looks like a. It looks like kind of a rugby shirt or something.

[J]

Just. Just a hoodie. Yeah, yeah.

[Tom]

You look like you're about to go out on the court. Okay. And shoot a few. There's Christy Lee. Pat Godwin's in isolation in the isolation booth back there.

[Willie Griswold]

That light sneeze attack with that light reflecting on your head, you look like a lizard with a heat lamp. Like it's. It has to keep you warm.

[Pat Godwin]

That's not a compliment. Let's go back to Jeff.

[Tom]

Well, now let's. Have we any more sports or we got.

[Christy]

Oh, real quick, Tom, since you had your issue at graduation with the guy standing up.

[Tom]

Yeah, yeah. Do I need to set this up?

[Josh]

Where the people.

[Tom]

When they. When they. All these graduations now, they always say, when it's time to pass out the diplomas, please hold your applause till the end. Well, they don't. And it's drives me crazy. Let. Let them. Let them applaud.

[J]

Right.

[Tom]

If you're happy that your daughter graduated, go for it. There was near. A near fist fight at Sally's graduation.

[Christy]

Well, you'll be happy to know they did not do that at this one. You could yell as loud as you wanted. And a lot of families did, which good for them. It sounded like it was some of their first times that their kids graduate anyone in their family.

[Tom]

That's great.

[Josh]

Oh, yeah, that's exciting.

[Christy]

But before it started, there was a teen behind me who was being a bit loud, and his dad goes, hey, you need to keep it down. You're gonna ruin people's experience. And he goes, I don't give a damn about other people's experience. And I turned around to him and I go, well, I do so zip it. And I turn back around. That kid didn't say another word the entire time. And Maggie's just pinching my leg like, oh, I can't believe you talked to that kid.

[Willie Griswold]

That's awesome.

[Tom]

Wow. I should have had you come to my grandma graduation.

[Christy]

Oh, it felt so empowering.

[Josh]

Now, is there something among dads that you. Do you think that dad was a little upset that you outdated him in that situation, or do you think he was like, thank you.

[Christy]

Well, the dad was like, two And a half rows back. And so I think he appreciated that.

[Willie Griswold]

Like.

[Josh]

Okay.

[Christy]

Because I made. I. I mean, I looked him. Right.

[Josh]

So he saw it as support, not some alpha move.

[Christy]

I believe so.

[Willie Griswold]

Yes.

[Tom]

Are they doing the new thing now? Now in which the. The person passing out the diplomas, be it the head person at the school, whatever it might be.

[J]

Yeah.

[Tom]

They do the thing where they pass the diploma, then they freeze and there's someone. There's someone off stage. So there's sort of this weird momentum thing.

[J]

Yes.

[Tom]

Hey, everybody's cheering, then freeze frame.

[Christy]

Well, ours. They announced. And then the, like, two people down hand the diploma and do the pick picture.

[J]

Oh, okay.

[Christy]

So it kind of keeps it moving. But the guy was great. He waited till everyone stopped yelling for the kid before he announced the next kid. And it was. It was great. Everyone had fun.

[Tom]

They should do it. Like they do the Oscars where they do the photograph. They have a backstage thing and just have a mannequin of the guy passing out. Okay. Walk up there, just pretend it's Mr. McKinley, for God's sake. We gotta get this. We gotta get. We gotta keep it moving. Well, thank you for that. Sounds like a fun time.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Congratulations to your son.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Christy]

He did something a million other kids did. No, but way to go, dude.

[Josh]

Way to do what you really should have. Yeah, exactly.

[Christy]

Very, very minimum.

[Tom]

Very good.

[J]

Do you think we should go back to the time where, like, it was acceptable for parents to parent other people's kids?

[Willie Griswold]

Yeah, yeah.

[J]

You know what I mean?

[Christy]

I do it. I don't care.

[J]

You get like. I mean, but, like, physically. Do you remember getting smacked by somebody else that wasn't your parent?

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, I do too.

[Willie Griswold]

You guys were bad kids.

[Tom]

There is a terrific scene in the television series Mad Men.

[J]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Early on.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom]

And that's my era at the cocktail party. Yeah. Where another dad gives it to. That is. That's exactly how I grew up.

[J]

And the parents were fine with it, Right? Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Christy]

If I ran home, I was like, Mr. Adams smacked me. My dad would smack me for making Mr. Adams smack me.

[Josh]

Yeah. That guy yelled at me. Well, what'd you do exactly. Yeah.

[Christy]

Never took the kid side ever.

[Josh]

But the problem now is that imprinted and now I can only get off of a stranger. I have to pay strangers to smack me across the face.

[Willie Griswold]

Once you pay them, they're not even strangers really, so it kind of loses the effect.

[Josh]

It's.

[Tom]

But you got to remember when you were little. I mean, I still remember that you think every. All adults are smart and good and right.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Then it takes a while before you suddenly realize, wait a second. Mr. Mr. Siegman is a dick that became a teacher to enact.

[J]

Did they paddle at your school?

[Josh]

We had paddle.

[J]

Yeah, we did.

[Josh]

On the wall and that was enough.

[J]

Okay.

[Tom]

We.

[J]

Yeah, there was paddling at my school in elementary school still. So you got paddled at school. You could bet you're going to get paddled when you get home too.

[Tom]

We just had serious humiliation with the threat of having to go to a state school.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh my God.

[Josh]

Can you imagine having that over your head?

[Willie Griswold]

Oh, my gosh.

[Jeff Oskay]

God forbid you had to go public.

[Tom]

Thank you.

[Willie Griswold]

Always good catching up with you, Pop. Always good seeing you.

[Tom]

Once again, the benefits of a classical education. We're having a good time. Do we have any more sports? Are we done?

[Willie Griswold]

We got one thing. I wouldn't call it sports necessarily.

[Tom]

Let's come back with it. How about that? Okay. We are in the Aurelioto part Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Ace Cosby]

More of the show is on the way. You can find us on X at Bob and Tom or you can email us at Bob and Tom. Bob and Tom dot com.

[Tom]

Good boy.

[Josh]

Oh, welcome back to the Thomas Lost His Mind Show. My favorite, the Bob and Tom show live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Coming up, we have Greg Warren with the Warren Report, sponsored by champion windows. Visit championsavenow.com man, we've got a full house. It's a lot of fun. Christie. Jess Hooker, Jeff Oskay, Willie G. Ace Cosby, Patty G. In the performance room today, I'm Josh Arnold. There's Tom.

[Tom]

Thank you very much. So we're gonna stick with the name Tom.

[Jeff Oskay]

What would you, what name would you like?

[Tom]

Wally the Wax Man.

[Josh]

Wally doesn't suggest authority in any way.

[Tom]

No. Big Jack, your leader. I like that.

[Willie Griswold]

And the wax man just sounds like you wax people for a living. Yeah, people think of waxes records.

[Tom]

That's gone away. Yeah, we, we didn't drop our new wax.

[Jeff Oskay]

No, I don't think you're gonna hear.

[Tom]

That one time that was, you know, hot wax. Yeah.

[Willie Griswold]

Dropping wax now sounds like a fetish thing. A pretty girl with a candle and she screams at you, steps on you with.

[Josh]

If I had to guess, anybody in this building right now who has had hot wax dripped on them. I'm guessing Jeff. Oscar.

[J]

100%.

[Willie Griswold]

He's writing something down like he remembered a story that he wants to use for his stand up.

[Christy]

That's right. What did you think, Burns?

[Josh]

Yeah, yeah. I've heard that the pleasure comes from. From the cooling of it. Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, if you knock it.

[Josh]

Hey, that's too hot. Oh, it feels better when it's not that hot.

[Christy]

Another little head. Don't do it if you're hairy.

[J]

Yeah, that's.

[Jeff Oskay]

That would rip off, wouldn't it? Rip the hair off.

[Christy]

It's just a mess.

[Josh]

Look at Tom.

[Tom]

You can't believe that you've done it.

[Jeff Oskay]

Have you ever done it to someone?

[Josh]

No, no, I've done cold things. I've never done hot things.

[Christy]

If you are gonna do it, hold it at least a foot above the person so that it does. Don't pour it directly.

[Jeff Oskay]

Right. So it gives some chance to cool a little bit.

[Christy]

Christie's had it done.

[Jeff Oskay]

No, I haven't had it done. I've done it. I haven't had it.

[Tom]

Wait. I didn't know this was a thing. I thought.

[Josh]

Oh, really? The dripping of the hot wax in.

[Pat Godwin]

A movie with Madonna.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Oh, gee, a movie with Madonna. I wonder why I didn't go see it. Oh, I know. Madonna was in it.

[Willie Griswold]

This is why you haven't done it, because you say things like that.

[Tom]

No, I. I remember. Remember my only experience with this. My sister was visiting many, many years ago, and she. She had this. It looked like a giant bar of soap, and it was. And she put it on my stove and melted it. And she was waxing her legs.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Josh]

Oh, okay. Yeah.

[Tom]

I remember thinking. I remember who came up with this. Hitler. And she'd like, rip. Scream.

[J]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Now. Now, Josh, you've had the. The Brazilian. Whatever you call it.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Tom]

The front and the front and the back done by a professional. What is it called? A depilatorist. What is the.

[J]

An esthetician.

[Josh]

Yes.

[Tom]

Okay. And your thoughts again?

[Josh]

I. It was effective. Yeah. Yeah. It was uncomfortable, but worth it. And, yeah, if you're. If you're looking to really get smooth, go with that.

[J]

A lot of people just do it in the summer.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Did you take a mirror to admire the backside to see how it looked?

[Josh]

No, no, I just. Stevie wondered it. I could feel.

[Tom]

Okay. Because I was curious. Does it stay red? Does it stay red for several days after you've ripped the hairs out with water?

[Josh]

I can tell you. Yeah, the front stayed red. In fact, you have to really wash with, like, a rough sort of loofah or sponge type thing to make sure that you don't get a bunch of ingrown hairs.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Willie Griswold]

Use that soap they have at truck stops that smells like cherries.

[Josh]

I love that super old Max.

[Willie Griswold]

I love that soap. I love that soap.

[Jeff Oskay]

What was that stuff? Lava.

[J]

Lava soap.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Tom]

You can't.

[J]

You can't get in a hot tub. You can't work out for like 48.

[Josh]

Hours, you know, they never bothered to tell me that. Did you let him know he can't work out for two days? Do you think we needed to let him know?

[Tom]

Only Jimmy knows is spelled J I M. It's his buddy. Now, do you. When it starts to grow back, do you get like five o' clock pubic shadow?

[Josh]

I mean, it's not like the exact same on your face, but. Yeah, yeah.

[Tom]

Mean. Then for a while it got a crew cut down there.

[Josh]

No, that would be too long.

[J]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Oh, once it gets like a quarter inch, you.

[Josh]

Well, crew cut, I guess. Yeah. I don't know.

[Tom]

Did you ever take that butch wax and put the Butch wax?

[Josh]

Probably something from 1810.

[Tom]

Hey there, folks. It's butch wax.

[Christy]

Was.

[Tom]

Guys would get more or less a crew cut, but they'd. They'd leave like a. Like an inch in the front, right?

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Tom]

And then butch wax, where you'd put it on there and you could comb it straight up.

[J]

Oh, like pomade.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Yeah. But it was in a stick. It was called butch wax.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, now it's.

[Tom]

These days. These days, butch wax sounds like what happens during a roller derby match. It's a move.

[Josh]

I will defend that joke.

[Christy]

So do.

[Josh]

And I may have to.

[Christy]

Tom was talking about the mirror. So, like, is it like a haircut? When you're done, do they hand you.

[J]

A mirror for you 100.

[Christy]

Do they hold it up so you can take.

[Josh]

Oh, they did for you.

[Tom]

Oh, yeah.

[J]

That was like. Yeah, it was a pretty big mirror and it had a handle and that way you could go all the way. Yeah.

[Tom]

Oh, no kidding.

[J]

I had two kids, so.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, it was.

[Willie Griswold]

Yeah.

[J]

You just. You were able to look or. She said if you want to, you could put the mirror on the floor and squat and then you could see everything.

[Tom]

Oh, wow. That's a classical joke.

[J]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

What?

[Christy]

Watch out for the whole.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Tom]

So you.

[Willie Griswold]

You've had.

[Tom]

You've had the full waxing down?

[J]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom]

Front and back.

[J]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

Didn't you work there?

[J]

I did work there, yeah.

[Josh]

Now only one esthetician at the place I would go to was. Was doing male and female.

[J]

Yes. Yeah. There's lots of women that don't.

[Josh]

Do they. Is it a choice or a licensing thing?

[J]

It is not a licensing thing. It's a choice because that skin is so tender that you Want someone. Someone who knows what they are doing. Then they're down there in the sack area.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[J]

Yeah.

[Josh]

And I mean, I was not. I'm already a grower, not a shower.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Josh]

And when you're in that position, I mean, I. Like, she must have been like this poor man.

[Tom]

Were you making small talk?

[Willie Griswold]

Small something.

[Josh]

Yeah, yeah. I mean, I made sure that it was a. Like, I would make jokes. We were laughing, we talked about each other's lives and relationships. She had a. Her boyfriend is a fan of mine. I was like, hey, next time, just have him come on in and we.

[J]

Can watch, we can talk.

[Jeff Oskay]

There's a great scene in Bad Mom's Christmas with this particular thing. She's doing a wax job on a guy who's in a. He's a stripper. Male stripper. And they end up, you know, falling in love. And it's kind of funny. You would love it.

[Josh]

Oh, she met the one straight male stripper.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[J]

Did they let you choose your position when you went in, or did she tell you what. How she.

[Josh]

I pretty much said, hey, whatever you think is best. Because she did say, hey, on this one, you can either. You could either lie on your side.

[J]

Or right in the fetal. Like, you pull your knees up, or you can get on all fours and present.

[Josh]

And I opted for the fetal position.

[Tom]

How.

[Willie Griswold]

Which is less embarrassing.

[Josh]

Fetal for sure. For me.

[J]

Yeah. That's the only way I ever did it.

[Tom]

Do they warn you they put hot wax on, right?

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Did they paint it on with a.

[Josh]

Brush or a Popsicle stick?

[J]

Yeah.

[Ace Cosby]

Okay.

[Tom]

Oh, that's weird.

[Josh]

No, they're just recycled tongue depressors from the urgent care down the street.

[Willie Griswold]

The one that I went to so bad there was jokes on the inside of them.

[Tom]

Do they do like a. They swab this stuff on your skin, then how long do they have to wait for? They rip it off.

[Josh]

Not long. I mean, it cool. It starts cooling and hardening, boy, five to 10 seconds.

[Tom]

Do they give you a three, two, one, pull? Yeah.

[Josh]

And then finally I said, don't. You don't have to do that. So, you know.

[Tom]

Were you tearing up at all?

[Josh]

I never did, no. My eyes never water. But there were times where I went, okay. And I'll tell you, the most painful spots were not down there.

[J]

Yes. It's. I would say my legs were always the most painful.

[Josh]

The back of my neck.

[J]

Yeah.

[Josh]

And that was. I was good. Now, there were a couple taint. Old waxings that I. Man, I felt.

[Willie Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh]

For sure.

[Tom]

But do they ever take the skin with it.

[Josh]

There was one, one time that there was a little bit of blood on my symphysis area, which is the pubic area above everything.

[Willie Griswold]

Nice, man.

[Josh]

So it was. Yeah, the pubis.

[Tom]

I love the myth of symphysis. He's rolling, rolling the rolling the conads up the leg. Okay, I'm lost. We're having a good time, I think. I hope you're enjoying this. We have one more sports story, then we'll get to some news. And we got one of my favorite human beings, Greg Warren coming up. Yeah, and Greg has a great comedy special out there. It's on Nate Bargetzi's a special YouTube channel. It is absolutely terrific. It's called the Champ. I give it a double thumbs up. It's a terrific show. We're going to talk with Greg. I hope he can have today's show come up to his standards. That's all I can say.

[Josh]

He will not want to talk about this, I promise you. Any kind of waxing. The man's a prude.

[Tom]

Okay, okay. I didn't. Do you think this is a. This is. There's no sexual content to this.

[Josh]

Anything with balls. He hates it. Which is why when I hang out with him, I, I, that's all I talk about.

[Tom]

How are you guys friends?

[Willie Griswold]

Come on.

[Josh]

No, he doesn't care for me.

[Tom]

Fine. We are in the Orel Auto Parts studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Ace Cosby]

Got a comment to share? Text us at 888-262-8661. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Josh]

Hey there, it's the Bob and Tom Show. Thank you for joining us. We're live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Christy Lee sitting at the Silac Insurance Company news desk.

[Jeff Oskay]

Hello, Josh.

[Josh]

Looking lovely as always as is Jessica Hooker. Hi, Jeff Osk is there.

[Christy]

Willie, isn't that looking lovely?

[Josh]

Yeah, you look very handsome.

[Christy]

Thank you.

[Josh]

Willie G is the mustachioed fella across the way.

[Willie Griswold]

Hey, good to see you.

[Josh]

Ace Cosby clean shaven today. Looking great.

[Christy]

Can I be dapper?

[Josh]

You are very dapper. Yes. I am the resplendent Josh Arnold. Coming up, we have the adorable Greg Warren with the Warren Report which is sponsored by champion Warren windows. Visit championsave now.com and there he is.

[Jeff Oskay]

Don't forget diva or he'll be upset.

[Josh]

Oh, I'm so sorry, Pat. I have not.

[Pat Godwin]

Say my name, say my name.

[Josh]

Godwin is in the performance room. And Tom, my gosh. If you are to strapping, well built hunk of a man.

[Tom]

Oh, thank You.

[Josh]

You ever been called a hunk to your face?

[Tom]

Dapper dick.

[Josh]

He's a dapper dick, ladies and gentlemen.

[Tom]

Now, you were discussing the waxing that you experienced.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Was this a dare?

[Josh]

No, no. It started off kind of as one when you. Well, it wasn't so much a dare as you going, hey, by the way, tomorrow you're getting waxed on the air.

[Tom]

Oh, yeah.

[J]

You are responsible for this.

[Josh]

So you can say it started off as a gag.

[Tom]

I said, if you don't do it, you don't have a hair in your neck. So, yeah.

[Josh]

And then from. I would. It went from there.

[Tom]

I see. Now, did you warn a potential bed mate of the situation?

[Josh]

No.

[Tom]

You. You let them be surprised by the.

[Josh]

I. I would say I let them be pleasantly surprised, yes. Yeah. No, that's never gotten complaints.

[Tom]

I see. I see. Ms. Hooker, you mentioned that you had done a full waxing down. Yeah. Is that something that one discusses, or is it part of the charm of discovery?

[J]

No, I think it's always a pleasant surprise on a guy's end if that. You know, if that happens. Right.

[Josh]

And with you, you just. You don't say, hey, by the way, I'm shaved down there.

[Tom]

No. Or wax.

[Josh]

Yeah, exactly. That's what Tom thinks.

[J]

Oh, no, he's wondering what the etiquette is.

[Jeff Oskay]

How does that come up in conversation?

[J]

I mean, here's a rundown of things that you might see in this. No, I don't.

[Willie Griswold]

I got a weird.

[Josh]

What's for dinner? A chicken cutlets. You know, by the way.

[Tom]

Is that something you'd put in a Tinder profile?

[Willie Griswold]

No, no, no, no.

[Josh]

It's.

[Tom]

Because we do have a Tinder profile update in the news coming up. Yeah, yeah, They've. They've made a change. We could switch gears and do that story if you want. Christy, I. I've never been on Tinder. It's not something that I'm in the market for. But now, Pat, you've done the. You've done the Internet dating thing very, very quickly.

[Pat Godwin]

Tinder quickly, in and out. Boom.

[Jeff Oskay]

Tender testing a new feature that would allow users to indicate a preferred height range for potential matches.

[Josh]

Oh, why not? That's fine.

[Jeff Oskay]

A company spokesperson confirmed to TechCrunch that the tools being rolled out globally as part of a limited test. Only Tender Gold, though, and premium subscribers included in the test group will have access.

[Tom]

So that's not there now.

[Jeff Oskay]

Users will not.

[Tom]

You don't put am six foot two, you.

[Jeff Oskay]

Well, you put how tall you are, but you can't say, I Won't date anybody that's under 5, 9 or something.

[Willie Griswold]

Like that unless you pay for it.

[Jeff Oskay]

Right?

[Tom]

Yeah. If you want someone who's four or five, yikes.

[Josh]

There are shorter people out there.

[Tom]

That's. That's called Tinder Garden.

[Willie Griswold]

There we go. Okay. Yep, there we go. Because I was curious about what he was doing there.

[J]

I thought he was talking about little people.

[Josh]

Well, we hope. In fact, I tried to steer it kind of that way.

[Tom]

It's a dating app.

[Jeff Oskay]

Today the spokesperson clarified the setting is not a strict filter profiles outside a user stated preference will still appear, but may be shown less frequently.

[Willie Griswold]

I just think this is going to lead to guys lying about it more. And I think that's going to disappoint more people.

[Christy]

Well, I like how it's just like it says like 5, 9, 5, 8, 5, 7. And then the bottom box is just short kings.

[Greg Warren]

Yeah.

[Josh]

Yeah. I think you should be able to do it with fat fitness and with whatever.

[J]

Instead of just saying, wait, I meant weight.

[Tom]

So.

[Willie Griswold]

So you can do that. You can say if you're paying for like hinge, say, you can say, I'm only looking for someone that exercises often. You can, you can. But again, you have to pay for it to eat these, to weed these fatties out.

[Josh]

But by that same thing, it's like, hey, I only want a woman over 150.

[Jeff Oskay]

You know what I mean?

[Willie Griswold]

Yeah, yeah.

[Tom]

Can you say, do you have your own transportation? Are we taking a bus?

[Josh]

That's the gamble. That's the dance.

[Tom]

Can you. Can you pass a drug test?

[Josh]

No. This is.

[Tom]

Do you have a job?

[Willie Griswold]

I mean, yeah, you can put. I want someone that smokes pot. Absolutely.

[Christy]

420 friendly.

[Tom]

Oh, that's what it says.

[Josh]

You put that. Yeah.

[Willie Griswold]

On Hinge. Specifically, it'll say, how often do you drink? Never. Sometimes are often same thing. Weed. No.

[Pat Godwin]

What about binge is. What do you. What do you say on binge?

[Tom]

So binge.

[Josh]

No sobeys.

[Tom]

That's it. That's an offshoot of Hinges.

[Pat Godwin]

You drink every five days for a lot. A lot.

[Tom]

Wow.

[Josh]

What about cringe? Is there a. A dating song for. I'll go.

[Tom]

Yeah. Oh, wow. Okay.

[Josh]

Well, she looks like Shemp.

[Tom]

Shemp, of course. From Three Stooges, ladies and gentlemen. We were talking about them just the other day.

[Josh]

You felt the need.

[Willie Griswold]

That's Tony explains because it sounded like Waxman Larry, but he explains Jim.

[Tom]

Well, it sounded like he might have said another sh. Word. I wonder.

[Josh]

I'm about to clarify. Followed by head.

[Tom]

Always, always talking about yourself. Pat, don't you have a tribute to. Oh, dating. Dating apps.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Let me take this capo off.

[Tom]

Hold on. Take off his capo. It's unbelievable sitting in there.

[Pat Godwin]

Return the tin. I spent $500 on high end dating apps and brightened early each morning. I checked the traps. No one responded to me. If you like, swipe right and I'll. Pretty little lady wants to hook up tonight.

[Willie Griswold]

Nice.

[Pat Godwin]

She doesn't look like her photo, but neither do I. I'm really 10 years older. She says I'm a guy. Nobody's perfect. I spent a lot of effort.

[Tom]

Get.

[Pat Godwin]

A lady in bed.

[Tom]

You know he did.

[Pat Godwin]

I met a new girl on Tip. Tinder. The trailer.

[Tom]

Hold on.

[Pat Godwin]

I was about to. I was about to blame Tom. Okay, here we go. I met a new girl on Tinder. Oh, the trail is filled. The suit of fed. Oh, this isn't working. Returned to bartender. Met a girl at the bar. I'm going old school now we're making out in my car at Applebee's.

[Tom]

Return.

[Pat Godwin]

To Tinder.

[Josh]

Excellent.

[Tom]

She had a penis. Thank you very much.

[Pat Godwin]

I thought you were doing the drums. I just hit the keyboard.

[Josh]

Wow.

[Pat Godwin]

See, this is all new.

[Tom]

Innocently sitting here. Oh yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

It's all new to you, huh?

[Tom]

Certainly enjoying it. Thank you very much. Now we have one more sports story. Is that correct?

[Willie Griswold]

Yeah.

[Tom]

What is it?

[Willie Griswold]

I mean, it's. It's. It's impossible.

[Josh]

He's rude.

[Tom]

He's a rude.

[Willie Griswold]

It's just crazy rules. Rolling Derby is launching the first ever speed joint Rolling tournament.

[Tom]

Okay, now stop right there. So Rolling Derby is not the skating.

[Jeff Oskay]

Well, that would be roller.

[Tom]

Okay, just. Is Rolling Derby a famous.

[Willie Griswold]

I don't know.

[Josh]

I've never heard of it.

[Willie Griswold]

I do not know. There's a music festival called Rolling Loud. I'm curious if it's affiliated with those guys. They're both weed oriented. Participants age 21 or older can enter in the inaugural joint Rolling competition by posting a video.

[Josh]

You hear how deflated he is?

[J]

Yeah.

[Josh]

How? He doesn't.

[Pat Godwin]

He's afraid to read this story.

[Willie Griswold]

It's just because. Because he's gonna yell, you know, when the green light comes on. You gotta shut up. That's doing the song. The damn lights on he goes. We got one sports story. He's been saying there's one sports story for an hour, Josh. And I've been ready every time he made Christy read the damn story.

[J]

And all this time I thought it was just Chick's bad attitude. But it's. It's when you sit in that seat.

[Willie Griswold]

No, it's not. When you sit in the seat, it was oriented at 2 o' clock. That's the issue.

[Josh]

But let's not, let's not sell chicks. Bad attitude short here.

[Willie Griswold]

Submissions close on June 30th. You can post on X or YouTube using the hashtag. Hashtag. Rolling Derby sponsored by Raw rolling papers. The competition will last four months. You got to do that with stoners. You can't give them a week. You got to give them. You got to go. You got October boys.

[Josh]

That's so funny.

[Jeff Oskay]

So do they submit a video of them? Rolling Joints championship final.

[Willie Griswold]

The top 16 fastest joint rollers will compete.

[Jeff Oskay]

Okay.

[Willie Griswold]

For the the first stage of the online derby, challengers must roll a one gram joint starting from whole nugs with the timer beginning the moment the rolling papers touch.

[Josh]

So lost art. Willie, what do you think?

[Willie Griswold]

Rolling? I don't know.

[Josh]

Are you pretty good at it?

[Willie Griswold]

I roll my own joints, dude. I'm. I'm pretty good.

[Josh]

Oh, good.

[Willie Griswold]

I'm pretty good at it. But people now for the most part just go to dispensaries and they get pre rolls which are quite convenient. Convenient. But the pre rolls, they never burn right. And you got to really kind of mess with them before.

[Josh]

No kidding.

[Willie Griswold]

And then it's still. It's running like a track star. That's my. When it's burning only on one end, you say everything's running like a track star.

[Josh]

It's a good thing.

[Willie Griswold]

It's a lot of fun. And then it's not a good.

[Christy]

That's a horrible thing.

[Willie Griswold]

It means it's only smoking on one side. So then you have to look your.

[Josh]

Finger left or right. Yeah, I thought. I know what you're talking about. Yes.

[Willie Griswold]

But yeah, man, I'm pretty good at it. It takes me forever. It takes me about 10 minutes to roll a good honest joint.

[Tom]

Well, isn't that, doesn't that add to the romance of the whole thing?

[Willie Griswold]

Yeah, and I make mine kind of a cone. I don't roll the cone first and then stuff it. That's not as good. You got to get it in there. A lot of it, guys, you got to roll the tip or the crutch. That's a very important part. I've started outsourcing that. Now I buy pre rolled tips which again, I feel like sort of a loser when I do that. But yeah, I'm pretty good at it.

[J]

But is it like comfort food? Like the food you grew up with? Like that's how you like your food preparation prepared like your Joints are better than anybody else's. Like, you prefer yours?

[Willie Griswold]

I mean, I think. Oscar, do you like my joints that.

[Greg Warren]

I roll that you sold with me?

[Willie Griswold]

We could just go right to it.

[Josh]

If we want to.

[Christy]

No, he rolls a mighty fine joint.

[Tom]

All right, so you can get store bought rolled already.

[J]

Yeah, the pre rolls just like cigarettes.

[Josh]

Is there ever a reason to double wrap?

[Willie Griswold]

You know what? You can. It saves it. My buddy Grant used to roll blunts, and his whole thing was that he double wrap it because it would go faster. Faster. The first one's like a loose one and the second one's tight, but then it's just like so much. It's like when you get a double wrap burrito at Chipotle.

[Josh]

See, I've never done that. I'm curious.

[Willie Griswold]

It's because the person messed up. They put a tear in and they go, oh, no, it's fine. And then they ruin. They ruin the tortilla to beans ratio. That's no fun for Will. So you gotta just. You. You cut it open and then you re. Roll it is what you do. You take your time.

[J]

Oh, okay.

[Tom]

It's the way when you reuse condoms, Josh, you always double up just in case.

[Josh]

Absolutely, yeah.

[Tom]

The force field admitted the first time he.

[Josh]

The double decker. Is it legs Got the cheese between the double.

[Tom]

The double dicker. That's right, the double dicker. Okay, good. We've made a lot of progress today, I think. So in any event, if you are a marijuana person, if you will, you can enter this competition. You got what, 30 days or so?

[Willie Griswold]

It's that we're a little bit late. It's open for four months, but it does say admissions close on June 30, so they started this in March, I guess.

[Tom]

Okay, so you roll away and. And this. Have you ever used this brand? Raw rolling papers?

[Willie Griswold]

Yeah, I do. I prefer elements, though. Those are rice papers. I get generic elements.

[Josh]

I'm a top man. A loyal top man.

[Willie Griswold]

Good for you. See, I don't go to the top. The top has dye in it. Raw, the whole thing.

[Josh]

I love the dye.

[Jeff Oskay]

Do they still have the zigzag?

[Willie Griswold]

Oh, yeah, they still have zigzags. They. But I heard that RFK might get rid of the dye in the papers, so we might be out of luck.

[Josh]

Oh, not my. Not. I won't allow it. I couldn't get into the character. You were struggling to talk.

[Willie Griswold]

I thought you were doing rfk.

[Tom]

Coming up, comedian Greg Warren's gonna be joining us. I'm sure looking for that. Greg has a great new special out there called the Champ. It's on Nateland on YouTube, on Nate Brazzy's special TV channel. Right now, I want to say hello to our buddies at the Silac Insurance Company. What's it all about? It's about retiring and making sure that you have money coming in Silac, the experts in annuities. As you know, the stock market up and down, up and down. Your 401k may look like a 201z these days. This is where the doom and gloom of what's happening out there will be not affected. Should you have something called an annuity, it counters the volatility of the market. Find out all the details from our friends at Silac Insurance. It's designed to protect your retirement with an annuity. And the way it works is you can't outlive your money. I guess that's the most important thing to mention with an annuity, you're still gonna be getting those checks every month. So see what a Silac annuity can do for you. Some restrictions apply. Learn [e-mail] by the way, here's another very easy way to access information. Just call pound250. So hit that hashtag. Sign the pound sign pound 250. Say the keywords lifetime income. Once again, that's pound 250 and say lifetime income. Or just go to silacins.com it's s I l a c I dash.com to learn about some really interesting things you could do to protect your money when you retire an annuity from the Silac Insurance Company. Or go to bobandtom.com we have a link for you. Silac Insurance Plan on it. Live on it. Coming up, Greg Warren, comedian. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show. Pacers are in the final.

[Josh]

Shut up. Welcome back to the Bob and Tom show. The O'Reilly Auto Parts carried away Christy Lee, Jess Hooker, Jeff Otto, Willie G. Ace Cosby, Patty G. Josh Arnold, Tom and my gosh, we've got another one being thrown into the fray. One of our favorite people, Tom.

[Tom]

Oh, there he is. The handsome factor is way up. It's comedian Greg Warren, the man behind the current special on Nateland Television. It is called the Champ and he is right there. I let's see him on the big screen. Hello, sir. How are you today?

[Greg Warren]

Hey, Tom. Hey, guys. How's it going?

[Jeff Oskay]

You're our champ. Greg, so good to see you.

[Greg Warren]

What did you Sorry, what'd you say, Christy?

[Jeff Oskay]

He said you're our champ.

[Greg Warren]

Oh, thanks.

[Josh]

Christy, congratulations on the special on the New York Times article.

[Tom]

Yeah, tell me about the New York Times article.

[Josh]

Josh, Greg has a New York Times article.

[Willie Griswold]

I saw it sitting at Grandma's place. It was spread out. It said six specials worth watching over Memorial Day. Him, Birbiglia. It's awesome. Greg Warren, the champ.

[Tom]

That's great. Thank you. That's great.

[Greg Warren]

Thank you.

[Tom]

Willie, Are they aware. Are they aware of how you and I often object to the crossword puzzle answers in the New York Times? Now that, now that you've been written up in there, should we.

[Greg Warren]

No, I. In fact, I might. I might need to quell some of that talk for a while.

[Willie Griswold]

Don't burn this bridge because you're mad at Will Shorts. Everything's gonna be fine.

[Tom]

Oh, well, there. There was a connections thing last week. Wrong. False fake. Sorry. Are you doing connections or just wordle?

[Greg Warren]

Well, I, I do the crossword puzzle, Tom. I'm a traditionalist.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Greg Warren]

I, I have dabbled in some of.

[Tom]

These.

[Greg Warren]

Hobby type stuff that you do.

[Tom]

Lesser is. Lesser is the word you're looking for.

[Josh]

Toilet games, really?

[Greg Warren]

Yeah, they are. Yeah. Yeah, it's. You know, Tom, why don't you just pick up a Highlights magazine and do.

[Tom]

Oh, yeah. Oh, well, now, Greg. Greg Warren's special. That is really nice that the New York Times said one of the great things to watch this summer. That's really cool. Congratulations.

[Greg Warren]

Yeah, it's apparent to me Josh didn't.

[Josh]

Read it, but that.

[Greg Warren]

That's cool.

[Josh]

No, no, I just saw your email and then quickly unsubscribed. No, I read it. It said very nice things.

[Tom]

Like what?

[Josh]

It said that it starts off. Off with his name. Hey, fishing. Fishing cheerleaders. Now that's a strong premise. And then it goes on from there. It says that Greg likes to exaggerate and play dumb, but he's really quite funny and smart. I read the whole thing.

[Greg Warren]

He did. He did read it.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Greg Warren]

Yeah, he did read it.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Greg Warren]

Thanks, Josh.

[Josh]

You're welcome, man. It was a good article.

[Tom]

Now your family members get a look. See at that thing, Greg?

[Greg Warren]

Yeah, yeah, they. They did, I think. Yeah, my dad did. He was impressed by it, my dad. It's. It's hard with, with this special because you, you know, we. We put it on Nate's YouTube channel and you're somewhat nervous that first couple days when it comes out. You know, make sure everything's right up there and all that. And I'd gotten A few comments, and people told me it was good and all the thing. And my dad called me, goes, well, it's not on YouTube. I. I'm pretty sure it is, dad. He goes, no, no, it's not. It's not up there. The trailer's there. That's probably what you're thinking about. It's. The trailer's there, but it's not on YouTube. I go. He goes, his wife. He goes, jill. Jill tried to find it, too. She can't find it. There's just that 1% of me that's like, oh, my God, something's messed up here. And then I'm like, no, he just. I don't know what he's doing.

[Tom]

See, but it's got to be proud. That's pretty cool.

[Greg Warren]

Yeah, no, he's very supportive. Yeah, yeah, yeah, he. Did you guys get to see him at the taping?

[Josh]

Yes. Always a pleasure. And I know he said something hilarious after the taping that evening that you and I discussed.

[Greg Warren]

I overheard him saying it to my friend Howie, and I didn't want. It was right after, you know, sort of a vulnerable moment after you tape your special. And I. I overheard him saying something. He's a coach, so he has to compare everything. And I think he's like, it was good. It was good. I mean, I think the peanut butter thing was better, but he may have been talking about the peanut butter thing relative to where the field corn grows, because he.

[Tom]

He.

[Greg Warren]

He never really liked that special. He's. He's let me know it's fine, but it's not. Yeah, yeah, I always like that one.

[Josh]

But, you know, my dad was the same way. He always, hey, hey, nice job. But, you know, you flubbed that one. They can't help themselves.

[Jeff Oskay]

It's that passive aggressive love.

[Josh]

Well, that's not very passive aggressive.

[Willie Griswold]

The first time my dad ever saw me do stand up, he was like, yeah, good stuff. And I was like, yeah. There was kind of that heckler moment. I didn't know what to do. And he goes, yeah, you're in the headlights up there. I was like, come on, man. I've been doing this a year.

[Josh]

That's what dads are for. Keep you humble.

[Tom]

If you're just joining us, hello. We are lucky enough to have on the horn, if you will, on the big screen floating TV over there on the side of the room, it's comedian Greg Warren. He is the man behind the current special called the Champ with a touch of a button. You can find it on Nateland TV in the world of, of television.

[Jeff Oskay]

YouTube.

[Tom]

I was gonna say two clicks away on YouTube. Right. And see what's going. Great. It's, it's all about if you're into, if you've ever been any kind of an athlete, if you have kids, you know what this is all about. Coaching, et cetera. So it's great stuff and it's nice and family friendly, if you will.

[Josh]

Greg, one of my neighbors saw you live and then has watched the special, and I cannot get him to walk by my house without looking at me and going, boy, that Greg Warne, he's right about cvs. He really latched on to one of your bits. He thought you, you really nailed it.

[Greg Warren]

Hey, Josh, you know, when I'm right, I'm right. Yeah, exactly.

[Josh]

Yeah, yeah. So make sure you watch the special to find out exactly what Greg has to say about.

[Tom]

It's very correct. Okay, now, if you delved into a topic for us today, Greg.

[Greg Warren]

Yeah, yeah, I, I, I, I thought it'd be a good time for us to all learn about boomerangs.

[Josh]

Excellent.

[Willie Griswold]

Nice.

[Greg Warren]

Yeah.

[Josh]

And this Warren Report is sponsored by champion windows. Visit championsavenow.com all right. Boomerangs originated in, I'm gonna say Australia.

[Greg Warren]

Yeah, it's, it's, it's unclear. Australia, Ancient Europe and North America and Asia all had them.

[Josh]

Oh, okay.

[Greg Warren]

There's where Poland is now. There's. They found one that was dated back like 23, 000 years ago.

[Tom]

It took a while to find it because it never came back.

[Josh]

Yeah, the Polish boomerang had wheels.

[Greg Warren]

The. I didn't think of that, buddy.

[Josh]

40 bucks and it's yours.

[Greg Warren]

Yeah, that's outstanding. The one thing I need to make clear, guys, and I learned several things, series, there are returning and non returning boomerangs. They don't all come back.

[Josh]

Who knew? I thought by definition a boomerang had to come back.

[Greg Warren]

Yeah, that's, they took some liberties with that phrase. Most of the original boomerangs were non returning. They were, they're like, you know when your girlfriend says she's going to the convenience store to buy some lotto tickets? She ain't coming back. No, it's, yeah, they were, they were called throwing sticks or in, in Australia, Kylie's is what they were hunting. Sticks a little heavier. They use them to hunt emus and kangaroos. And it says here parrots too, which I know, man.

[Jeff Oskay]

Gotta be good.

[Greg Warren]

You gotta be good and why you kill. I guess some of those parrots got a kind of a smart mouth, right? Yeah, I don't even know if they ate the parrots there.

[Tom]

Would you just.

[Greg Warren]

You need to shut up about that, Steve. And this is.

[Josh]

I don't.

[Greg Warren]

I'm not good with physics or anything physics related, and I don't understand science that well. So I really was trying to delve into, like, how they work. And on these reports, when I can't figure it out, there's a site that's like, kids encyclopedia facts. I went there and I still didn't get it. Like. But I did find this one thing that sort of explained it, why the boomerangs that do come back. Come back. You know, when you're canoeing with somebody and one person is canoeing stronger than the other person or harder than the other person, and that's when you turn. It's like that one of the arms is going slower than the other arm. So that's why it's sort of comes back in an elliptical shape.

[Josh]

Wow.

[Greg Warren]

Does that make sense?

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, that made a lot of sense.

[Greg Warren]

Okay. Yeah, that's the best I could find. They are the ones that come back, the returning boomerangs. They are convex on top and flat on the bottom. They are a large surface area in relation to weight. Elliptical flight path spins 8 to 11 times a second.

[Josh]

Second. Whoa.

[Tom]

Whoa.

[Greg Warren]

Yeah, that's pretty, pretty quick, right?

[Josh]

Were they ever used as weapons in war?

[Greg Warren]

Yes. Yeah, they used them in hand to hand combat. So, like, I would just hit you. They have a lot of uses. They. They would use them as percussion instruments.

[Jeff Oskay]

Like what?

[Greg Warren]

Kind of like clap sticks?

[Jeff Oskay]

All right.

[Greg Warren]

Yeah. And also to bludgeon fish close to the surface.

[Tom]

Wow.

[Greg Warren]

Yeah. Yeah. So. And they would use them to dig and. And they were used as a fire starters.

[Josh]

Wow.

[J]

It's like a Swiss army knife.

[Greg Warren]

Yeah, yeah, very much something. One article said that. Jess. One article said they were like the Swiss army knife.

[Tom]

So. So if you start a fire with.

[Jeff Oskay]

It, then you don't have a boom?

[Greg Warren]

No, no, no, no. Like, more of that. Like flint. Like, you.

[Tom]

Okay. I thought you burned it.

[Josh]

Take a lighter.

[Greg Warren]

Anything wouldn't. Tom is technically a fire starter.

[Tom]

If it's a weapon, you throw it at the guy and he ducks and it comes right back and kills you.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, that'd be bad.

[Josh]

Well, he ducks. Well, no, comedically. He ducks and then stands back up and says, you missed me. Then it hits him in the back.

[Greg Warren]

Oh, yeah, yeah, that's. Yeah, that's a good day.

[Willie Griswold]

That's a good one.

[Greg Warren]

Yeah, we used to make him.

[Tom]

We used to make him at my camp.

[Jeff Oskay]

What?

[J]

Oh, that's fun.

[Greg Warren]

Really?

[Tom]

Yeah. But there's a different kind of boomerang. Instead of being the one bend thing, it's it you make. It's like a cross cross.

[Greg Warren]

Yeah, yeah. There's a. There's a four prong boomerang.

[Tom]

Yeah, yeah. And then you would shave the ones it was. They were so cool and they really worked okay. They'd come right back.

[Greg Warren]

When Tom says he used to make them at camp. They, they. They had the immigrant children. They were paid minimum wage to make boomerangs for them.

[Tom]

Right.

[Pat Godwin]

Isn't that presented?

[Tom]

I traded a lanyard to little Haboo.

[Willie Griswold]

I wish he didn't name him.

[Greg Warren]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Reference for you guys.

[Greg Warren]

I missed it, man. I missed it.

[Tom]

Never mind.

[Greg Warren]

I like. I've written a couple. I've read a few Hemingway books.

[Tom]

Read in our time and get back to me. It's the best one.

[Greg Warren]

Okay. It's the best one. Yeah, I missed that one, Professor. Farewell to Arms is the ones.

[Tom]

Never read it. I read books. The bull.

[Greg Warren]

I. The bull fighting one was okay.

[Josh]

Also Rises. It's not overrated. It's wonderful.

[Greg Warren]

I like.

[Tom]

I like the Old man in the Sea. Terrible.

[Josh]

No, no. A wonderful story of man versus nature.

[Tom]

Boring.

[Willie Griswold]

You don't love the old man in the sea. Given the whole old man thing.

[Jeff Oskay]

And you love the sea sale, remember?

[Tom]

I may have to reread. Yeah.

[Greg Warren]

It was the sea he had a problem with.

[Willie Griswold]

Yeah. If it was the Old man in Lake Michigan, it'd be your favorite book.

[Josh]

Yeah, sure.

[Tom]

If he goes put a spinner grub into Beaver island, then I'd be into it. I'm sorry.

[Pat Godwin]

That's Old man on the seaward.

[Greg Warren]

They found 2,000 boomerangs in King Tutankhamun's tomb.

[Josh]

Boy, that's a fan.

[Greg Warren]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Returning and non returning. Yeah.

[Tom]

Collector.

[Josh]

You can't take them with you.

[Jeff Oskay]

He tried.

[Greg Warren]

I mean, when I was a kid, this is how dumb I. You guys have anything that you just really got wrong as a kid? I thought. Because I, you know, I. I thought they would like throw a boomerang and it would hit a rabbit or whatever and then it would carry the rabbit back to you.

[Tom]

Wow. Oh, that is one dumb kid.

[Greg Warren]

It is real dumb. And when I say kid right around 27, I think is what I figured. Yeah. This is the part where I was hoping one of you guys would say you. You did some dumb stuff too when you were a kid. But.

[Tom]

Yes, but yeah.

[Willie Griswold]

I thought chipmunks were baby squirrels till like 6 years ago I said it on air. And here I got made fun of. It was a whole thing. They don't have tails, Willie on Twitter. Yeah, I thought they grew the tail when they were 13.

[Tom]

Did you ever. Did you ever have a boomerang, Greg? Did you?

[Christy]

No.

[Greg Warren]

No, we never had one. But I've got a Nerf boomerang in the. In the trunk of my car for my ne nephews. And apparently those things work amazing.

[Josh]

They're awesome. They're awesome. Yeah.

[Greg Warren]

Really?

[Josh]

Yes. Yes. They're so fun.

[Greg Warren]

Yeah, I'm gonna. So I'm gonna do that. But when you throw it. I saw a video of a guy like, you throw it vertical, actually.

[Jeff Oskay]

Really?

[Pat Godwin]

And then.

[Josh]

Yep. And it goes to its side and poof.

[Greg Warren]

Yeah, it's almost like a. Yeah, it's almost like a pistol grip, Christy.

[Tom]

You.

[Greg Warren]

You hold. Almost like a pistol and you. You throw it vertically and then it's just sort of flattens out.

[Jeff Oskay]

I thought you threw like a Frisbee. Kind of.

[Greg Warren]

So did I. So did I. Oh, it's fun.

[Josh]

Yeah, you'll love it.

[Tom]

And there was a song called My Boomerang Won't Come Back.

[Josh]

Oh, my gosh. You've played that for us before.

[Tom]

I.

[Greg Warren]

That sounds great.

[Christy]

It's not.

[Tom]

It's.

[Josh]

It has not aged well.

[Willie Griswold]

Is it crazy creepy?

[Josh]

It's astonishingly unwoke.

[Tom]

Oh, okay.

[Greg Warren]

Oh, yeah. Don't play it. Guys.

[Willie Griswold]

I wanna.

[Greg Warren]

I want you guys to have a job.

[Tom]

I'll see if I can find it.

[Greg Warren]

So what they would do. He's gonna try and play it, isn't he?

[Josh]

Yeah, just hang up your best. Your move here is to hang up.

[Willie Griswold]

Yeah, yeah. Pretend that your connection dropped.

[Josh]

Yeah. This is the beginning of it.

[Greg Warren]

I'm not a part of this. Thanks, Greg.

[Tom]

In the bad backlands of Australia many years ago.

[Josh]

I don't know. This is the version.

[Pat Godwin]

We got a lot of trouble, chief.

[Josh]

On account of your. It's important to remember. That's a white guy. Never forget. Yeah, that man green up in Manhattan, Kansas.

[Willie Griswold]

His name was Glenn. It's really, really white.

[Tom]

The. The chorus is, my boomerang won't come back.

[Josh]

Apparently a novelty.

[Tom]

I'm sorry, I didn't remember. It was.

[Jeff Oskay]

Hey, look at the time.

[Tom]

Oh, yeah. We gotta check out Greg Warren. Don't you plug the special for me, won't you?

[Greg Warren]

You want me to?

[Tom]

No, I want to. Joshua.

[Josh]

Oh, well, okay. Next time, address me by name.

[Willie Griswold]

Yeah, it's the champ.

[Josh]

Son of a.

[Willie Griswold]

This morning, the n land. YouTube. And much like a boomerang, Greg will not be returning next week. A racist song. I forgot about that YouTube channel.

[Jeff Oskay]

Right, Greg, congratulations. It's awesome.

[Greg Warren]

Thanks guys.

[Tom]

Mr. New York Times.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Too snotty to talk to us?

[Greg Warren]

No, no, I just called in.

[Tom]

I did the Sunday crossword puzzle in 10 minutes. Tomorrow I'm doing it in German. Thank you. Thanks, Greg.

[J]

Bye, Greg.

[Tom]

The best way to listen to this show certain parts is with a Raycon earbuds because you can cancel them. They have a special feature that allows you to cancel the outside noises out there. Raycon earbuds, latest model, 32 hour battery life, multi point connectivity so you can pair two devices once with Raycon's quick charge function, give it a quick 10 minutes and you've got 90 minutes of battery or just go with that 32 hour battery life. And as I mentioned, the active noise cancellation, lots of cool colors and they. The main thing here is they have a 30 day happiness guarantee. If you don't like them, send it back, no problems and you get your money back. Buyraycon.com Time is the way to go and the place to go. You'll get 15% off the best selling Everyday Earth earbuds right now. That's buyraycon.com tom and they're designed to stay in your ear. They've got a special set of gel tips so you get the right ones for your particular size ear. Go to buyraycon.com tom half the price of those white ones and they're a lot better. Buyraycon.com Tom coming up, we're going to head over to the SILAC insurance news desk.

[Jeff Oskay]

We're gonna have our history lesson.

[Tom]

We are. Oh, oh, I'm out of breath. Thank you very much. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios and this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Ace Cosby]

Thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom show this morning. The show is also out there for you on our YouTube channel. Watch and subscribe. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Josh]

Hi there, Bob and Tom show. Live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Great time being had by all and all includes Christy Lee if you're keeping track.

[Jeff Oskay]

I'm down in the. Another bird feeder. Damn.

[Josh]

Oh my gosh.

[Jeff Oskay]

They took it last night.

[Josh]

True bandits.

[Jeff Oskay]

God.

[Josh]

Jess Hooker, how are your bird feeders?

[J]

All good?

[Josh]

Okay.

[Tom]

Yes. That sounds like it had some kind of sexual.

[J]

How are your bird feeders?

[Josh]

Yeah, I can't find it.

[Jeff Oskay]

I didn't. I've been taking one of them in all the time because it's one of those tray ones, you know, so I just take it in at night. So I. Cuz I knew they'd steal that. It's one of the tube ones that he can't even get in. Anyway, they figure it out.

[J]

Oh, you mean they don't just knock them off, they take off with the whole thing?

[Tom]

Yes.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh my gosh.

[Tom]

Is this. Is this the raccoons?

[Jeff Oskay]

Yes, it has to be raccoons.

[Christy]

You're going to have to do like what I did when I lived in the hood and chain that up. Like anything I had outside you had to chain to your front.

[Tom]

It was going to disappear.

[Jeff Oskay]

Well, I just have to start taking them in every night.

[Christy]

Like I had a. I got a new refrigerator and I put the old one out on the front porch so I could have someone come and take it away. And I'm making dinner and my son comes in. He goes, somebody just stole the refrigerator doors. And I go, what? And they had. They were the metal ones or whatever. And I looked down the street and there's just a guy walking with the. With my refrigerator doors down the street.

[J]

Just scrap the metal.

[Christy]

Yeah. At like 4:30 on a Tuesday.

[Jeff Oskay]

You think if I put my old treadmill out by the street, somebody will come take it?

[Christy]

They say come.

[Josh]

So they say if you put free, it'll take longer than if you put $20. If you put $20, somebody will take it.

[Jeff Oskay]

It works.

[Josh]

They did studies on that. Isn't that crazy?

[Jeff Oskay]

They did that with kittens.

[Tom]

What do you do with door. The doors of a refrigerator, they were that.

[Christy]

What's funny is it it was the cheapest one. So they weren't even real metal. Like so they couldn't have done anything with. They were taking them down to the scrapyard to scrap them.

[Tom]

Wow.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Christy]

Well, the best part, maybe that's what.

[Jeff Oskay]

My raccoons are doing.

[Christy]

A guy pulls up, he goes, hey, can I buy that refrigerator? And I go, it doesn't have any doors. He goes, I don't care, 50 bucks. And I go, cool. So he's loading it up into his truck and I go. As he's driving away, I go, hey, wait, you. You aren't the one who stole my doors last week, are you? And I'm like, oh, this guy just got a refrigerator for 50 bucks.

[Tom]

Have we completed all of our introductions?

[Jeff Oskay]

Yes.

[Josh]

Not at all. Jeff Oskay, Willie G Ace Cosby. I'm Josh.

[Willie Griswold]

I liked it.

[Josh]

There's Tom and Pat Godwin.

[Jeff Oskay]

Okay, we're gonna do our history lesson.

[Tom]

Yeah. But first a little history about the song My boomerang won't Come back. I don't think we need to do that.

[Jeff Oskay]

We really don't.

[Tom]

There is one aspect of this that I think is very important. Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Yes, sir.

[Tom]

Because I'm asking you this. You're going to know the answer. Oh. The song My Boomerang won't be. Come back. Very inappropriate. I'm sorry. I was. We were discussing Boomerangs with Greg Warren and it came up. Do you know who produced that? It was an English comedian, but you know the name of the producer of that song?

[Pat Godwin]

English comedian Spike Jones?

[Tom]

No. No. It was a guy named Charlie Drake.

[Pat Godwin]

I never even heard that name.

[Tom]

It was produced by a guy named George Martin. Oh. In 1961, just before he started producing the Beatles.

[J]

Oh, I should have known. Should have known.

[Tom]

Yeah. That's what I figured you'd guess. Pat, you want to just. You want to hear just the chorus?

[J]

No, no, no, no. You just said sorry for playing it, and now you're playing it again. Stop it.

[Tom]

I was just gonna.

[Josh]

I don't play it. I. You guys understand. The sooner we're cancelled.

[J]

Yeah, that's. You know what? You're right.

[Josh]

The sooner I can move on with my life.

[Willie Griswold]

No, if he gets canceled, I have to pay for Finn's college.

[Tom]

I'm out.

[Willie Griswold]

Don't buy it.

[Tom]

It's. It was. By the way, the song. Let Me Find It. It was numbered 21 in the Hot 100 in 1962 in the United States, number one in Australia, number 14 in the UK. But.

[J]

Yeah, there was nothing to listen to back then.

[Willie Griswold]

Yeah.

[J]

What?

[Tom]

It was a novelty song. It was silly. There were.

[Josh]

There are a ton of novelty songs like that.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, there are.

[J]

There's. There's some really good ones. What's the one you like the camp song so much?

[Tom]

Hello, Mata. Hello.

[J]

I love that one as a kid.

[Tom]

Well done. It's interesting there have been so few in the last couple of decades. Can you name any?

[Willie Griswold]

I mean, like, Baby Shark. Is that the kind of silly stuff we're talking about here?

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[J]

But is the Macarena like that?

[Christy]

Yeah.

[J]

Right?

[Tom]

Not really.

[Pat Godwin]

It's a lot of novelty songs.

[Jeff Oskay]

The last one were the kippadata ones, right?

[Tom]

Yeah. Ones that adults can enjoy. Yeah. The kipada fish pun thing.

[Willie Griswold]

You love asking us a question and then telling us we're wrong when we try to have fun with you.

[Tom]

I'm not doing it now. But you're correct. I do love that. Time now to check in with the. Our little history lesson here.

[Josh]

I'm now to check in with our little history lesson.

[Tom]

This is a. This would be a good day to do something because there's not much here.

[J]

That would be a good day to do something.

[Jeff Oskay]

I heard one on the way in.

[Tom]

What's that?

[Jeff Oskay]

That on this date, I don't know what. I can't remember the year, But Grover Cleveland became the first president to get married in the White House.

[Josh]

Oh.

[Jeff Oskay]

He was 49 and his wife was 21.

[Josh]

Pretty hot.

[Jeff Oskay]

Okay, so, yeah. Pulling a Griswold I didn't have.

[Tom]

I've got. Alexander Graham Bell makes the first sound transmission.

[J]

What did he say?

[Tom]

We may have one.

[Josh]

No, that's Thomas Edison. Yes, Thomas Edison.

[Tom]

How about this one? Guliel Mo Marconi.

[Willie Griswold]

Nailed it.

[Tom]

Applied to patent the radio.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, glad he did.

[Tom]

Yeah. Interestingly enough, the patent was awarded to the ninth caller. This is something. This. I didn't know this. In 1933, FDR authorized the swimming pool pool built inside the White House. Huh.

[J]

I wonder if it's still there.

[Jeff Oskay]

No, they filled it in and made a bowling alley.

[Tom]

Didn't they re. Didn't they dig it up again?

[Jeff Oskay]

I don't know.

[Tom]

How come the white.

[Josh]

The White House can have a bowling alley and a pool.

[Tom]

Right.

[J]

Not one or the other.

[Josh]

Man, if I'm president, it's all. That's all. The White House will essentially be a sky zone. It's just gonna be. It'll be a Chuck E. Cheese for sure.

[Willie Griswold]

Diplomats can come, play the arcade games.

[Josh]

You're telling me we can't solve the Middle east over some skeeball?

[Tom]

Hey, listen, one more time. Vladimir, you go in the dunk tank. Let's see. El Babe Ruth retired on this day. Famously. He pointed at the couch.

[Willie Griswold]

That's funny.

[Josh]

That's two for two.

[Tom]

Walked over to it. Oh, I remember hearing about this. I didn't watch it. Barbara Walters, on this date in 1981, asked Catherine Hepburn, what kind of tree are you?

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, God.

[Tom]

Right? Then they should have just said, barbara, get the hell out of here.

[Josh]

Why would she ask that?

[Willie Griswold]

I feel like you would love that. You love asking people impossible questions.

[Pat Godwin]

In that same interview, I'd be a willow. In that same interview, and this is not a joke, Barbara Walters asked her if she ever would wear a dress.

[J]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

And she replied, to your funeral.

[J]

Yes.

[Tom]

That'S the truth.

[Josh]

And actually, we have actual audio of Katherine Heern saying that. Here, let me hit the button here.

[Pat Godwin]

Yes, I'll wear a dress at your funeral.

[Tom]

That's nice. That's very good.

[Josh]

On Godwin Pond.

[Tom]

That's about all it's interesting. A couple of cool birthdays.

[Josh]

Like who?

[Tom]

The great Dana Carvey, born in 55. Absolute Genius actor Dennis Haysbert played the president on 24. Oh, sure, there's all the commercials for. What is it? State Farm, Major League.

[Josh]

And. And he was a terrific actor.

[Tom]

Yeah. Yeah. And then. Oh, Zachary Quinto.

[Josh]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom]

He played the number five on Naturally.

[Josh]

Yeah, he's. He's always joke.

[Tom]

What's quinto? Is that 15? Spanish was never my thing. So Justin Long.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, yeah, he's an actor, right? I like him.

[Tom]

Yeah, he's a porn star. Although that's Justin Bieber Long.

[Willie Griswold]

No, it's Justin Long.

[Pat Godwin]

He gotta change his name.

[Willie Griswold]

Justin Long, the actor from the best Die Hard movie. Justin Long.

[Josh]

Oh, careful.

[Willie Griswold]

You didn't like Die Hard 5? Come on, man. Now the Internet's a problem.

[Tom]

Okay. We are in the Aureli Auto Parts studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Ace Cosby]

Become a Bob and Tom VIP and get your Bob and Tom fix 24. 7. Get all the info in the VIP [e-mail].

[Josh]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. We're live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Christy Lee's at the Silac Insurance Company news desk. Yeah, Jess Hooker's there. Hi, Jeff Osk.

[Christy]

Yes, sir.

[Josh]

Willie G. Hey, buddy. Ace Cosby. Hey, I'm Josh Arnold. Patty G. Pat God One is in the performance room and Tom is here leading the way. The leader. Is that what it is?

[Tom]

Big Jack, your leader.

[Greg Warren]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Our salute to old DJ names I grew up with. Big Jack.

[Josh]

Nice.

[Tom]

Now we have Mr. God. You're rehearsing something in there. Is it pertinence in today's program?

[Pat Godwin]

Oh yeah, we have another highway spill. Oh yeah, we got an AI song. I'm just toiling away.

[Tom]

Let's get to the highway. What happened on the highway?

[Jeff Oskay]

Well, hey, hang on. Here we go.

[Willie Griswold]

Hang on.

[Jeff Oskay]

A crash Semi released about 14 million honeybees in northwestern Washington state. The Whatcom County Sheriff's office said the truck hauling an estimated £70,000 of honeybee hives rolled over close to the Canadian border near Linden. The driver not injured, but several hives came off the truck and released the bees deputies, county public work employees and several bee experts responded to the cities scene while local beekeepers work to reset the house.

[Tom]

See, that's why they say you shouldn't do buzzed driving. Proud of that one.

[Pat Godwin]

Let's not take all the jokes.

[Josh]

I didn't hear a joke.

[Tom]

I thought you maybe seen those commercials. You see Buzz driving Never mind. You got a song about this?

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

This is obviously to the tune. Adventure Highway. Highway. We do this all the time. But Venture Highway.

[Josh]

This riff.

[Pat Godwin]

Is now used in a brand a song on the radio in top 40. They sample this, so. Oh, it's now a hit again.

[J]

It is.

[Pat Godwin]

Here we go, kids. Fallen honeybees driving down the road.

[Tom]

Fields.

[Pat Godwin]

Of gold this plane sing on the radio.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

I'm in a mellow mood Stings music never gets old But I should put on a rock station yeah, I know Nodded off on the highway Even on amphetamines Crashed on the curb now bees are out looking for their queen Feeling buzzed, I know can't find the bees and it's getting late what if they can't pollinate? Could affect global food supplies. Eco ecosystem's ruined Many plants will die. They'll die. And I hope this bit does too. Birds do it, we all do it too. But if bees don't do it, we're all. All screw.

[Josh]

It's true.

[Pat Godwin]

Poetic and important message.

[Tom]

Wow.

[Josh]

Going on there for that hippie nonsense.

[Tom]

That was sampled a long time ago in a Janet Jackson song.

[J]

It is. Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

And it's brand. It's on a brand new one now. That was somebody. Was your lover back in 2001?

[Tom]

Yeah. Oh, wow. You're familiar with Janet Jackson?

[Willie Griswold]

Me?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, of course. She's nasty.

[Tom]

Okay, who's the one that just had the birthday. Birthday? That was.

[Jeff Oskay]

Latoya is the one that was in Playboy with the snake. Remember that? What? Yeah. Wasn't it? Or maybe. Am I making that up? Yeah. I think she was 90s.

[Tom]

In the.

[Jeff Oskay]

In the 90s. Yeah. Thanks.

[Tom]

Listed below. Tito, in terms of popularity.

[Jeff Oskay]

Did you watch 60 Minutes last night?

[Tom]

I did not.

[Jeff Oskay]

Your. Your girl was on there. They did a big long feature on Duolingo Lipa. I almost texted you.

[Tom]

I'm levitating.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yes, she did that. She sang for you.

[Tom]

Very good. We're gonna send it over to Christy Lee at the Silac Insurance news desk. What's happening?

[Jeff Oskay]

Police? Did I do this one about the ferret in Florida?

[Willie Griswold]

No.

[Jeff Oskay]

Okay. Police in Florida searching for a man who stole a 650 ferret by stuffing it down his pants. Security cameras at Patland in Jacksonville captured the guy browsing the ferret sound section, fondling a ferret for quite some time, and then apparently shoved the weasel in his shorts and walked out without paying.

[Christy]

Well, at least he fondled at first. I got it in the mood.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

Police described the suspect as having a unique long mustache. Footage shows him holding the crotch area of his shorts to support the ferret. And once again, they. They haven't found him yet.

[Tom]

So is in the front, because if he was a perv, he would have put it in the back.

[Jeff Oskay]

Because he's.

[Tom]

Going to catch the gerbil.

[Christy]

Willie, you have a mustache. Do you have a ferret?

[Willie Griswold]

I don't, shockingly, no. I don't like ferrets. And my friend when I was a kid had a ferret and it made the house kind of smell.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Willie Griswold]

And I've said that to ferret people and they go, oh, no, they're just not doing it right. And I'm not trying to be mean to the ferret community. Just not for me.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, our neighbors had ferrets too.

[Tom]

Why?

[Jeff Oskay]

They had a couple of them. They were pets.

[Josh]

They're smart and cute.

[Jeff Oskay]

They're cute. They're fun to watch.

[J]

Are they like cats? Do they just wander around the house?

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, a little bit.

[J]

I don't know if they had a cage or.

[Willie Griswold]

It's like a puppy. Their bodies are too long. They are kind of slurry.

[J]

They're slithery.

[Willie Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh]

They're kind of like weasels.

[Willie Griswold]

Oh, yeah.

[Christy]

Puppy snake.

[Willie Griswold]

I wasn't trying to be silly. I'm just a.

[Tom]

They're not in cages.

[Jeff Oskay]

You can't.

[Josh]

You can.

[Jeff Oskay]

Well, they have. You usually keep them in a cage, but a lot of people let them out. Like I let out my chinchilla.

[Willie Griswold]

My buddy had like the cage and there's like a little blanket in there and like some hay or. Yeah, it's a real wild night.

[Jeff Oskay]

They like to hide when they sleep.

[Tom]

Really?

[Jeff Oskay]

They like to hide, period.

[Josh]

They're very helpful. Like, if you ever see the movie Beastmaster, he has some ferret friends.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, does he?

[Josh]

Oh, yeah. Yeah. You're ever in some sort of medieval.

[Greg Warren]

Adventure.

[Tom]

Nice to know that'll happen. Uh huh.

[Jeff Oskay]

Hey. Sheriff's deputies in Colorado tried to lure a bobcat out of a family's residence with the help of laser pointers.

[Josh]

Do they work on big cats?

[Jeff Oskay]

Jefferson County Sheriff's department said the wild cat wandered into the home and curled up behind the resident's tv. Responding deputies used their tasers green laser to try and coax the bobcat out. But the unimpressed animal ignored that. Okay, so that answers your question. And later left on its own accord through an open back door.

[Tom]

I see.

[Jeff Oskay]

He.

[Willie Griswold]

He wanted none of their nonsense. Look, I know what you're doing with the lasers. I'll leave when I want to leave.

[Josh]

Yeah, I'll Be honest. I'm tempted. I'm a cat, for Pete's sake.

[Tom]

So it didn't work.

[Jeff Oskay]

Did not work.

[Tom]

Okay, good to know. Right now, the Bob and Tom show is brought to you by. Better Help. Men today face a lot of pressure to perform, to provide, and BetterHelp is all about accessing therapy because statistically, men are a little bit less likely to seek help when they need it. It's okay to struggle. It's okay. We're all doing something and dealing with something. So this is where therapy can come in and be extraordinarily helpful. And last month officially, I believe was it was called Mental Health Awareness Month. So if you're thinking about therapy, BetterHelp is a really cool program because the therapy itself is done online. So it eliminates one of the hurdles that may be stopping you from doing it. And as they say, the stigma. Get rid of the stigma. It's okay to talk to somebody. There are more than 35,000 therapists working in the BetterHelp program and you can get hooked up with one of them. And by the way, if you want to switch therapists anytime, there's no additional fees involved. And again, the therapy itself is done online. BetterHelp is the largest online therapy provider in the world and they can provide access to mental health professionals. And by the way, they have a diverse variety of expertise. So see what it's all about. Visit betterhelp.com BTC Once again, you can talk it out with Better Help. Bob and tom. Listeners get 10% off their first month at betterhelp.com btshow that's betterhelp h-e l p.com btshow Coming up, when you go to a restaurant, how do you get tips from the waiter or waitress? We're going to tell you how not to and perhaps how to when we return. From the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios, this is the Bob and Tom Tom Show.

[Josh]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. We're live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Christy Lee, Jess Hooker, Jeff Oskay, Ace Cosby, Pat Godwin.

[Jeff Oskay]

And we lost the Griswold. I'm Josh Arnold and Tom is out.

[Josh]

Having a heck of a day already. Great start to the week. And Christy, we were discussing your bird feeders off, off the air. One of them has been found.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, Andy just texted me and he found one of the bird feeders.

[Josh]

Excellent. They've been stolen by the raccoons.

[Jeff Oskay]

Searched the woods and came up with it. So, all right, get to go home and deal with that and this and this.

[Tom]

These. These are actual bird feeders. This is not.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yes.

[Tom]

Okay.

[Jeff Oskay]

What do you think of it?

[Josh]

The second time you've mentioned this is some sort of.

[Jeff Oskay]

How is a bird feeder sexual euphemism?

[Josh]

I don't. It doesn't make any sense.

[Tom]

Have you seen the bird feeders on that chick?

[Jeff Oskay]

No.

[Christy]

So you are talking about.

[Tom]

About breasts? Yeah. It extends the metaphor.

[J]

No.

[Josh]

Boy, if you're nursing birds, those nipples have got to be a wreck.

[J]

Have you ever had a girl baby bird? You do you know that reference with beer?

[Josh]

Once, yeah.

[Tom]

What is this?

[J]

Now to baby bird, Somebody is to put something in your mouth and then put it into somebody else's mouth.

[Jeff Oskay]

Remember Alicia Silverstone was feeding her kids that way? That was a big story back in the day.

[Christy]

I do it with Jagermeister at bars when I get a little too much. Hey, you want a baby bird shot?

[Josh]

Lean back. Pretty gross.

[Tom]

Yeah, it's pretty gross with your hairy face.

[Christy]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom]

God, what else is she getting besides. Oh, yeah. A little bit of remnants of the taco bar.

[Christy]

Yeah. I can't eat with a mustache. I just rub it into my mustache instead of putting it in my mouth.

[Tom]

He's being sarcastic.

[Willie Griswold]

Let's see now.

[Tom]

Let's go that direction. We have Christy Lee over there at the Silac Insurance news desk. What's happening?

[Jeff Oskay]

Could book clubs be the new path to romance?

[Tom]

Oh, Josh.

[Josh]

No, thank you. No, thanks.

[Jeff Oskay]

According to.

[Josh]

Wait.

[Tom]

What important books are you reading? Josh.

[Jeff Oskay]

According to a Talker research poll of 2,000Americans who attend book clubs, nearly 25% say they've met someone there that they are romantically interested in.

[Josh]

Makes sense.

[Jeff Oskay]

Men were notably more likely to report a romantic connection at book clubs, 38% compared to 16% of women. In fact, 45% of respondents said they would prefer to meet a potential partner through a book club rather than a dating app. Interestingly, more than half of those surveyed also admitted that they keep their book club members membership private. What does that even mean?

[Josh]

Does that talk about it with people?

[Jeff Oskay]

Yes.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Christy]

I belong to an audiobook club.

[Josh]

Oh, yeah?

[Christy]

Yeah. That's a lot of fun.

[Jeff Oskay]

Really?

[Christy]

Yeah.

[J]

And stare at each other.

[Tom]

It's. If you're. It's a great way to meet the women that are height challenged. Why are they short every. You know, if you want to be hanging around little women.

[J]

What's it.

[Willie Griswold]

A little.

[Josh]

I don't want to get mad at him because he is trying. You know what I mean?

[J]

But not enough so I didn't realize.

[Tom]

That Little Women was also maybe you familiar with the movie?

[Jeff Oskay]

Of course. We all know about Little Women, the book. I just wonder. I've never heard of men being part.

[Josh]

Of a book club. Yeah, it is rare.

[J]

I guess I was going to ask that.

[Jeff Oskay]

Right.

[Josh]

It's because we don't want to read the Court of Thorns and Roses or whatever the hell.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, God, that was a movie. I didn't read it either, but I know it's your turn. Talking about. My girls were real into that.

[Tom]

Well, a book club is. I mean, it's better than going to the library where most of the men are there to masturbate with the free computers.

[Jeff Oskay]

All right. Well, that was a surprise.

[Tom]

Well, I mean, at the book club, you're going to meet a woman that knows how to be quiet. Right?

[J]

You're just knocking them out of the park now.

[Josh]

I mean, that makes perfect sense. The people in book clubs would be attracted to people and other readers.

[Tom]

Yes. Yes.

[J]

Like anything. Go. What? Go where your interests are and you'll find someone.

[Josh]

Yeah, exactly.

[Tom]

Yeah. So this really isn't like a revelatory. Oh, my God. The place to meet people who read books is a book club.

[Josh]

I've never been a part of a book club. Have you guys?

[Tom]

Nope.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, I know people who are, but they're not. They're not co Ed.

[Jeff Oskay]

No, they're all women.

[J]

It is. It's always women, usually. Yeah.

[Tom]

So therefore, it's. It's like Josh when he was in high school and all the play plays, you know.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, so if a guy joined a book club, he'd be the only guy there.

[Tom]

Well, in Josh's case, the only straight guy in the. What was the name of your choral team?

[Josh]

My show choir was called Flamingos. My show choir was called Premiere.

[Tom]

Premiere.

[Josh]

I see. Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

You were not.

[Josh]

No, we were all. There were only. None of these. There were two that were maybe, but they weren't out at the time.

[Jeff Oskay]

Okay.

[Josh]

I've heard since then that one did become. Yeah, one is now out now.

[Christy]

Josh, could you explain the difference between jazz hands and spirit fingers?

[Josh]

Yes.

[Christy]

I've always wondered the difference.

[Josh]

From what I understand, spirit fingers are mostly a cheer thing, and they kind of. You just kind of wiggle your fingers. Jazz hands. You want to jazz up the whole hand.

[Christy]

Oh, okay.

[Pat Godwin]

Now, what about jizz hands and spirit fingers?

[Tom]

Subtle.

[Josh]

Just hands and sperm fingers.

[Pat Godwin]

That's what I said.

[Josh]

Yes. One involves the palm, the other doesn't.

[Tom]

Oh, okay.

[Pat Godwin]

It's a very subtle difference.

[Tom]

What. What is the first one called?

[Jeff Oskay]

Spirit fingers.

[Josh]

That's a cheerleader after a cheer, they.

[J]

They do that. Or usually during free throws, we would do this.

[Tom]

Oh, yeah. So you hold your arms out. This is how I go to the grocery store and I say, open sesame. And then.

[Josh]

Yeah, it's kind of an open sesame thing.

[Tom]

That's how that works for me.

[Josh]

Yes.

[Tom]

Do you still do that? I do that all the time.

[Pat Godwin]

No, that's a good joke for the kids.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

They think you're magic.

[Josh]

I don't say anything. I'll just physically move my hands apart like a Moses.

[Tom]

Every time I go to Target, I do that. My.

[J]

My favorite one for the kids is to close one eye. That's like. If they're in the passenger seat, you close this eye while you're driving. Then they think you have your eyes closed.

[Pat Godwin]

That is.

[Willie Griswold]

Oh, yeah, that's a good one.

[Tom]

It's a great, great G. Great.

[Jeff Oskay]

Now their kids must laugh all the time.

[Tom]

Oh, they do.

[Jeff Oskay]

They're laughing at you, of course.

[Tom]

Absolutely.

[Jeff Oskay]

Okay. Restaurant bros say it's time to stop asking your server, what's your favorite dish?

[Josh]

I never did. Anyway.

[Jeff Oskay]

Bon Appetit notes that while servers often are menu experts, asking what their favorite dish is can lead to awkward moments such as the diner rejecting the server's thoughtful recommendation.

[Tom]

Yeah, that's the thing. If they go, oh, well, my favorite thing is that. No.

[Jeff Oskay]

Tia, polite of sommelier in Chicago says it's better to share your preferences first try. I like spicy food. What would you recommend? In Philly, a restaurant manager there by the name of Maggie Cook suggests narrowing down a few choices and then asking your server for their inputs.

[Christy]

That's how I do it.

[J]

Yeah.

[Christy]

I'm like, I can't decide between the Reuben and the fish and chips. What do you suggest?

[Josh]

That's great.

[Christy]

Like, oh, stay away from the Reuben.

[Jeff Oskay]

Right.

[Christy]

You're like, okay, I'll go fish and chips.

[Tom]

You think they're. They do a little assessment of you and going, the guy at table six. The guy at table six looks like he just smoked a fatty in the parking lot. Maybe recommend him the chili and the burger. Yeah, I. I don't know. I. I don't like reading menus anyway. But all of them. I say, what do you. What are some of the things you have? So at least you narrow it down so then I can say, you've got to get this.

[Jeff Oskay]

Then you go, why don't you just.

[Josh]

Say it's the opposite of narrowing it down? Asking, what are some of the things you have?

[J]

Yeah.

[Josh]

I swear to God, I would grab the Menu and paper cut you across the floor.

[J]

Really?

[Jeff Oskay]

Why don't you just say, all I eat is salad and salmon, what do you recommend? And they can go, well, how about the salmon salad?

[Tom]

Then I'd go, no, I'll have the chicken.

[J]

I work on a wait staff and so I will go in the kitchen before the lunch rush and just say, hey, what is something that we have a lot of? Or what is something that you want to.

[Josh]

I always assume that happened anyway.

[J]

More. Yeah, that's what I'll do. Like if we, like if it's late in the week and we have a bunch of something left, they'll be like, hey, push this.

[Josh]

I always figure, hey, the shrimp's about to turn. We gotta.

[J]

Yeah.

[Tom]

The server comes out. I like the steak. I'm a vegetarian. What are you doing in here? This is a barbecue joint, you idiot. Get the hell out of here. That's interesting. Being a server is fun. Did you know that? I'm sure you know this, that menus, there's a whole science of laying out a menu.

[J]

Yeah.

[Tom]

And they often put the thing they make the most money on. If it's a two page menu, they put it middle. Right?

[J]

Yeah.

[Josh]

And you're also sometimes in a square.

[J]

Yes.

[Tom]

And you're not supposed to stack the prices.

[J]

Nope.

[Tom]

Because people will scan them and just get the cheapest thing. So you're supposed to have them in the middle and stuff like that.

[J]

Yeah. There's also a breakdown of like how many segments you should have and changing the form font and the size and all that stuff.

[Tom]

Yeah. I like it when a server will go, I wouldn't get that if I were you.

[Pat Godwin]

Here.

[Jeff Oskay]

I do too.

[Tom]

If they go, that's not their strongest thing here.

[Josh]

You immediately trust that person.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[J]

Yeah. For not leading with the positive. Yeah.

[Josh]

Well, yeah. For not. Yeah, exactly. You don't feel like you're being lied to.

[J]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Okay, now we have Christy Lee right over there. And I should point out, if you're just joining us, we are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. And this is the Bob and Tom program with our news from the SILAC Insurance news desk. What else is going on?

[Jeff Oskay]

Candy maker Haribo is recalling bags of sweets sold in the Netherlands.

[Tom]

Is that the dead gorilla? No, no.

[Jeff Oskay]

What?

[Josh]

That was Harambear.

[Tom]

Oh, sorry.

[J]

This is the gummy bear people.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yes. And the recalling bags of sweets sold in the Netherlands after some were found to contain traces of. Of cannabis. According to the BBC, several people reported feeling unwell after eating from a two pound pack of Haribo Happy Cola F ZZ Candy.

[Josh]

Aren't you going to feel unwell if you're eating two pounds of gummies? Anyway, Haribo is the great. The company that have the great commercials with the adults talking like children. It's the kids voices. And they're lip syncing like two football players.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

For a food safety official's report. The samples were taken and cannabis was found. Found in them. Only a few bags are found to be contaminated, though. But they're recalling the entire stock as a precaution.

[Christy]

Why is my 6 year old playing Dark side of the Moon on his recorder? Oh, we better check the gummy bears.

[Jeff Oskay]

And who, by the way, is the recorder people? That is every kid in elementary school has to get a recorder. That's a scam.

[J]

And third law.

[Jeff Oskay]

Well, is it a law?

[Pat Godwin]

No, it's not a law, but that's what they.

[J]

It's in the. It is in the music.

[Tom]

It's a very inexpensive instrument to manufacture.

[Josh]

So it's a good introduction to learning your scale as well.

[Tom]

I know, but you don't have to have an embouchure. You don't have to have read.

[Jeff Oskay]

Sure, but I mean, I don't know.

[Christy]

Somebody's uncle is making some money somewhere.

[Tom]

You guys are both wrong. The recorder, the whole recorder thing involved involves any foreign film made in Canada about nature. The soundtrack has to be a recorder. And the gray leg geese attack. Now, I pat. Can you think of any major rock song that features a recorder?

[Pat Godwin]

Stairway to Heaven features something like that. Might be a tin whistle, though.

[Tom]

Oh, yeah, that could be.

[Pat Godwin]

But it could be a recorder.

[Tom]

I mean, Aqualong, the great Jethro Toll album, has the terrific flute much, much different than a recorder.

[Jeff Oskay]

But right when I'm with you, Jeff. Somebody's uncle has made a lot of money.

[Christy]

Someone wrote something in somewhere.

[Tom]

But they're so. I think the thing is they're cheap. They make unbreakable ones and it gives kids a chance to learn this.

[Josh]

We didn't have to buy them in school. I mean, this was in the 80s. So you just handed it to them. They were just. We had. There were 30 in our school.

[J]

Yeah.

[Josh]

And each class. Yeah. I'm sure we wondered why we all had the flu half the year.

[Pat Godwin]

Tom, you know John Mellencamp's Rocking in.

[Tom]

The USA at the end of that.

[Pat Godwin]

There'S something recorder like going on. If I recall, at the very end of that. That's a pretty big song, huh?

[Tom]

Okay, I. I'll.

[Josh]

It can be rather shrill.

[J]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You can Only hear Hot Cross Buns so many times.

[Tom]

Here we go. You're right, Pat. John Paul Jones, the great bass player and multi instrumentalist from Led Zeppelin, did four overdubbed recorders to make that part at the end of Stairway to Heaven.

[Josh]

I always assumed it was like something like a fife or.

[Pat Godwin]

It was. Had a lot more power than.

[Josh]

Or a pan flute. Something that Tolkien would have.

[Pat Godwin]

So it's four recorders.

[Tom]

Yeah. John Paul Jones was always the sort of unknown secret ingredient to Led Zeppelin. A great session bass player and session player, but lots of other stuff, but I did not know those were recorded. Good to know.

[Jeff Oskay]

And yeah, that recorder talk was going to go nowhere.

[Pat Godwin]

So stuff. It's a weekly bit now.

[Tom]

Now can you play a recorder pad?

[Pat Godwin]

That's my first instrument and I absolutely loved it. I carried it everywhere with.

[Josh]

With me.

[Pat Godwin]

I really enjoyed it.

[Jeff Oskay]

Really?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, for like five years.

[Tom]

Okay, here we go. This is.

[Jeff Oskay]

I'm gonna buy you one on Amazon.

[J]

Oh, I have a bunch of really cool kids.

[Tom]

One of the songs on my hate list is Ruby Tuesday by the Rolling Stones. I despise that song. Brian Jones plays a recorder on that. It says the Beatles on Fool on the Hill.

[Jeff Oskay]

Okay. Yeah.

[Tom]

Okay. Well, so. Thank you. Thank you, Christy. Sure.

[Jeff Oskay]

A Maryland woman facing charges for allegedly striking a child who called her Miss Piggy on a flight back from Disney World. According to court records, 46 year old Christy Crampton struck the child with her fist and a water bottle.

[Josh]

Whoa.

[Jeff Oskay]

Then slammed his head into the airplane window.

[Josh]

Huh.

[Jeff Oskay]

The incident occurred on an allegiant flight returning from Disney World. Crampton told authorities the child became disrespectful during the trip.

[Josh]

Sounds like it.

[Jeff Oskay]

He called her fat and Miss Piggy. Alleged assault. Police said Crampton took the child's phone, leading to a confrontation when the boy pushed her arm off the armrest. She reportedly struck him.

[Josh]

He started it.

[Jeff Oskay]

Her relationship to the child was not disclosed.

[Tom]

Has to be.

[Jeff Oskay]

Has to be a relative, right?

[Tom]

Yeah. Because you just go up to some random kid and take their phone.

[Willie Griswold]

Wait a minute.

[Josh]

If this is a relative, how is this news at all?

[Tom]

Now?

[J]

Why is it news? Yeah, that's how she was arrested.

[Jeff Oskay]

She was arrested.

[Josh]

So the family if it. Well, we don't. We can't just speculate. All right.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah. In court documents, it said. It did not say.

[Tom]

But isn't that very.

[Jeff Oskay]

I mean, she appeared in court earlier.

[Tom]

Isn't that how Miss Piggy reacts?

[Josh]

Very much so.

[Tom]

I mean, I think she's.

[Christy]

She's.

[Josh]

She goes from 0 to 10 like that.

[J]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Josh]

Yes.

[Tom]

I, I think it's. What do they say on, on the note on point.

[Josh]

So I think this is. I think this is a lesson every boy has to learn. You don't call a woman fat, and the sooner you learn it, the better.

[Jeff Oskay]

I bet he doesn't do it again.

[Josh]

There's no way you'll do it again.

[Christy]

I think when the, when they're doing the pre flight announcements, they should play this story so that the kids stay in line on the plane.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Christy]

Like, hey, we're gonna slam your head against the window if you let him know.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Statler and Waldorf are going best, best entertainment ever on a flight. That sounded more like Nixon, didn't it? I am not a puppet. Pat, play me a song. Well, that's. That's interesting. It has to be. Has to be a relative.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, you would hope.

[Josh]

Strangers, a strange kid. Man.

[Tom]

Yeah, that's.

[Christy]

We were talking about beating other people's heads.

[J]

I might take that back. Thanks.

[Josh]

Is there a picture of her? Does she look like Ms. Biggie?

[J]

I don't know.

[Jeff Oskay]

Jeff. Jeff, she's.

[Christy]

She's a bit doughy.

[Tom]

Really?

[J]

No, but does she have like the blonde hair and stuff? Does she look like her?

[Christy]

Yeah, she looks like someone who would slam a kid's head against the window.

[Josh]

Awesome.

[Tom]

But I mean, having just left Disney World, you got to remember the level of.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah. Your patience are big.

[Josh]

Yeah. She was way done with this.

[Tom]

Yeah. And if you're at the Orlando airport, that's always a one hour ordeal and.

[Jeff Oskay]

Then you're on the greyhound of the skies.

[Tom]

So can't say I blame. Does it mention the applause from the rest of the people on the plane?

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Yeah. Shut the kid up. Thank you very much, Christy Lee. Right. Now I want to remind you, that was about a decade ago. Chick McGee walked in one Monday morning and said, I found this really cool security system. It's called Simply Safe. I installed it myself. It's amazing. And we have since become good friends with the Simply Safe people. We. In fact, I'm looking around here, we have Simply Save right over there and out there out front so we can see what's going on all the time. With Simply Safe, you can install it yourself. It's. It's very simple. Not a lot of wiring you have to deal with or anything like that. It's all done with remote stuff. And you can all even have someone from Simplisafe install it for you. They'll give you the name of someone to put it in. If you don't feel like doing it yourself. The larger point here is that it is simple because it's a simple setup system that works the way you want it to. You can have it set on your doors, your windows. You can have the camera work. Simply Safe also has something called Active Guard Outdoor Protection. It's AI powered cameras monitoring what's going on outside with agents that are looking around to make sure that no one's lurking around your property. They can kind of, I guess, sort of before it even happens, deter crime. See what I'm talking about by visiting the SimpliSafe website. By the way, SimpliSafe is ranked number one in customer service by Newsweek and by USA Today. Monitoring plans start at just a buck a day. So visit simplisafetom.com and claim 50% off a new system with a professional monitoring plan and get your first month for free. Once again, if you get this special monitoring plan, 50% off the system and your first month is free. Right now, that's simplisafetom.com simply safetom.com there's no safe like Simply Safe. Christy Lee, what's coming up?

[Jeff Oskay]

We have a toe liquor in the news.

[Tom]

A toe liquor in the news.

[Jeff Oskay]

Well, and that we never got to our duck rate causing a problem in Cape Coral, Florida.

[Tom]

Okay. Oh, God. We got ducks and toes.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Tom]

All, all coming up next. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Ace Cosby]

Want to share something? Send us an email. Bob and Thomas bobandtom.com this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Tom]

Radio app to win.

[Josh]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom show live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Think O'Reilly Auto Parts for all your car care needs. Get the parts and service you need fast from the professional parts people at O'Reilly Auto Parts. Christy Lees at the Silac Insurance Company news desk.

[Tom]

Hello.

[Josh]

Jess Hooker and Jeff. Jeff, Oscar here.

[Greg Warren]

Hi.

[Josh]

There's Ace Cosby. Hey, I'm Josh Arnold. Pat Godwin in the performance room. And there's Tom.

[Tom]

Hello, Josh and thank you. Let's go right over to the Silac Insurance news desk and see what's happening with Christy Lee.

[Jeff Oskay]

I'll tell you what's happening. A California man's been arrested for allegedly breaking into a woman's home and licking her toes while she slept.

[Josh]

Oh, boy. One of these guys.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah. The Stanislaus County Sheriff's office says 26 year old cruise Christian Anguinano has been stalking this woman since February after first encountering her at her workplace on the night of May 21, he allegedly entered her home without permission, placed her toes in his mouth, and attempted to get into bed with her. The woman pushed him away. Located Anguiano the next day near his. Near her residence. He now faces charges of burglary, sexual batteries, battery, stalking, an assault with intent to commit. A felon.

[Josh]

Must have been terrifying.

[J]

Oh, my gosh.

[Tom]

Does the guy think it's gonna work?

[Josh]

Yeah. Seriously.

[Tom]

What's going through his head?

[J]

Whether you're breaking in my house or I'm married to you, if you put your mouth on my toes, I'm kicking you in the face.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Josh]

Instinctually. Or.

[J]

Yeah. Just because that feels like mud. Your tongue between my toes, that feels like mud.

[Tom]

This little piggy is going to ram you in the balls.

[Christy]

I found this out. My. My girlfriend, before she met me, she was down in south beach with some friends. They didn't have enough for a hotel, so they slept on the beach. And she woke up to a homeless guy with her entire foot in his mouth.

[Josh]

That's a. Yeah, that's old. Yeah, that's old beach bumberry. He.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, he's a To licker.

[Josh]

Yeah, he'll. He'll suck your foot.

[Tom]

Goes.

[Christy]

We got a room the rest of the time.

[Josh]

Yeah, he likes to sleep in girls.

[Tom]

What was her response?

[Christy]

She freaked out, and the. The guys with him, like, jumped on the guy and, like, beat him. Beat him? I guess.

[Tom]

Up, not off. Wow.

[Christy]

Yeah, but she said he had it all the way down to almost her ankle.

[Tom]

Wow.

[J]

Well, if he could do that, he could probably make some money and not be homeless.

[Christy]

Yeah, that's.

[Josh]

Well, no, this is. I choose this life.

[Tom]

I mean, is part of the fantasy the fact that he breaks in and probably.

[Josh]

It has to be. It must be.

[Tom]

You can't. I can't imagine. He thinks this is going to work out just fine.

[Willie Griswold]

I know.

[Tom]

Is that going through his head? She's going to like this so much. He's going to invite me into.

[Josh]

Right? Boy, I.

[J]

Or maybe it worked one time and.

[Josh]

He'S trying it again and he didn't marry that woman.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, right.

[Tom]

Well, where he's going, he's going to be getting a foot. All right. I'd like you to meet your cellmate.

[Jeff Oskay]

A rogue duck is ruffling feathers in Cape Coral, Florida, and it's already sent one person to the hospital. WFTX reports a Muscovy duck has been chasing and attacking residents in the neighborhood, creating chaos. Chaos on quiet streets. James Sepulveda said he was relaxing on his porch when the duck snuck up and bit his hand hard enough to draw blood.

[Josh]

Funny.

[Jeff Oskay]

Wildlife officials say the duck is protected under federal law, but can be removed as long as it's done humanely.

[Tom]

In other words, setting free the local gator.

[Jeff Oskay]

The Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission says Muscovy ducks are covered by the Migratory Bird Treaty act.

[Josh]

And they know it. That's why they act like.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah. However, a special control order allows removal of these birds, their nests and eggs in areas outside their natural range, which does include Texas, but not Florida. So apparently Florida is where they live. I don't know.

[Tom]

So they probably are going to be having that Peking duck special.

[Josh]

Yeah, yeah. There's. There's an orange glaze being prepared right now.

[Tom]

Ms. Hooker, you're too young to remember this, okay? But when we first started this show, Chris, do you remember what happened?

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah. There was a Chinese restaurant in one of our little areas of town.

[Tom]

There's a famous neighborhood that. It used to be the whole thing on the canal. It was called the home of the ducks. That was their motto in the neighborhood. They've kind of dropped that, which is a shame.

[Jeff Oskay]

But there was a restaurant that was taking the ducks out of the canal.

[J]

No way.

[Tom]

Yes. We want them fresh.

[Pat Godwin]

They were delicious.

[Josh]

Never frozen.

[Tom]

I wish they do that to the geese. I'd be all in favor. I wouldn't mind.

[Jeff Oskay]

Would you eat a geese?

[Tom]

As long as I knew they'd slaughtered 50 for each one I had to eat, I would.

[Jeff Oskay]

Do people eat Canada geese?

[Josh]

Oh, I don't know if that's the kind of goose they eat or not.

[Jeff Oskay]

I know you can eat a goose, but I don't know if you can eat Canada geese.

[Josh]

I don't know.

[Tom]

I don't know.

[Jeff Oskay]

I guess you can eat anything.

[Tom]

I'm saying I want them to build a wall. It had to be really tall to keep the keys. But they're everywhere. And all the do is they have deficant the size of a truck driver. Anyways, the. The. The ducks are still around, but not. Not I.

[Jeff Oskay]

The ducks are around. The restaurant is not.

[Tom]

Oh, well, the police had a. Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

The police had to be called in and they.

[Tom]

They quacked down on this.

[J]

Yeah, that's what he did.

[Jeff Oskay]

Uhhuh.

[Tom]

Quack down. You see? Yeah. Ducks.

[Josh]

I laugh.

[Tom]

Ducks go quack.

[Greg Warren]

Yeah.

[Josh]

Look, you got a laugh from Osu. You got to take that run, man.

[Tom]

How do the ducks not get. I don't understand. How do they land in a Florida pond and not get eaten by the gators?

[Jeff Oskay]

I don't know, maybe gators don't like duck. Maybe it's too fat for them.

[Josh]

Yeah, it's very greasy.

[J]

I just had duck on Friday.

[Jeff Oskay]

Very good.

[Tom]

Did you eat duck eggs?

[J]

Yeah. Oh, yeah. I prefer duck eggs. Yeah. They're just.

[Tom]

Why?

[J]

Because they're bigger. You don't. You only have to crack one and they're about the equivalent of two, so. Yeah. And the cost is the same.

[Tom]

Really.

[J]

Yeah.

[Tom]

And they have it at the regular grocery store. You have to go to some exotic.

[J]

You have to go to the farmer's market.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah. You know, I haven't seen them at the store.

[J]

I haven't either. No. But yeah, and ducks lay eggs year round, so you can get duck eggs a lot more because there's like in the cold months, it's hard to get your chickens to lay.

[Josh]

So.

[Tom]

Good to know. Thank you very much. Well, we're gonna wrap things up and say thanks to everybody. We have wrapped up our, our pop up store, right?

[J]

We did, yeah. It was over last night.

[Tom]

And a very popular shirt. We'll come up with a new one real soon. We have a couple of.

[J]

We do. We just, we just worked out our idea. Yeah.

[Tom]

We have a couple of very interesting ideas.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, I bet.

[Tom]

Christy, how do you like this one? We have foot. Your footprints right there where the boobs would be.

[J]

That's in the running.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, boy.

[Tom]

What do you think?

[Jeff Oskay]

Footprints.

[Tom]

Yeah. Would you like Christy's feet?

[Jeff Oskay]

Nobody's gonna buy that.

[Tom]

Oh, there'd be two or three. Thank you for your indulgence. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Ace Cosby]

Thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom show this morning. Catch any part of the the show you missed later Today on our YouTube channel.

[Tom]

The United States Soccer Federation presents the U.S. soccer Podcast. Inside the opening 45 seconds. What a goal with that cannon of a left foot.

[Josh]

I'll leave it at 1.

[Tom]

Never miss a game.

[Jeff Oskay]

What a start for the United States.

[Josh]

Shot for distance.

[Tom]

What a goal. Never miss a moment. Exquisite. From the San Diego.

[Willie Griswold]

Can he finish?

[Tom]

Yes, he can.

[Ace Cosby]

The U.S. soccer Podcast.

[Greg Warren]

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