The BOB & TOM Show - June 3, 2025

Summary

The BOB & TOM Show – June 3, 2025

Hosted by The BOB & TOM Show | Cumulus Podcast Network

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Wildlife on the Loose

The episode kicks off with a humorous discussion about bird feeders being taken down by raccoons and the subsequent dilemma of securing them without inconveniencing the local avian population. Tom humorously remarks at [07:31] “‘Is a little manscape 20 foot around.’” highlighting the playful banter among the hosts as they navigate the challenges of bird feeding.

Unexpected Guests: Bears in Condominiums

A quirky news segment covers an unusual incident where a black bear was found napping in the lobby of a condominium in Naples, Florida. Josh shares his disbelief at [08:28] “‘This is in Naples. Yeah, my brothers live there.’” sparking laughter and imaginative scenarios about the bear’s accommodations, likening it to a “‘bear’s lounge with Muzak playing’.”

Tribute to The Three Stooges

The hosts pay homage to classic comedy with a tribute to The Three Stooges, specifically discussing the passing of the last living daughter of Curly Howard. Christy reflects at [12:19] “‘It's just absolutely terrific.’” as they reminisce about the beloved trio’s influence on comedy and share favorite episodes, including “Microphonies.”

Special Guest: Comedian Dyke Michaels

Introducing comedian and chef Dyke Michaels at [99:20], the show delves into his eclectic background. Dyke shares anecdotes from his time as a strip club bouncer and the challenges of running a food truck named "Beast." At [140:13], he humorously recounts dealing with unexpected situations, saying, “‘It combined two of my least favorite things, physical altercations and glitter.’” His transition into stand-up comedy and podcasting highlights his versatile talents.

Sports Highlights: Josh Allen’s Wedding & World Records

The show covers the recent wedding of NFL quarterback Josh Allen and actress Hailee Steinfeld. Pat Godwin excitedly shares at [48:42] “‘The couple’s wedding took place in Southern California…’” while also celebrating David Rush and Hollywood Hannon breaking the Guinness World Record for the most behind-the-back baseball catches in one minute with 39 catches at [50:32].

The Impact of Video Games on Youth Behavior

A thoughtful segment explores the correlation between video game usage and social behaviors in elementary school boys. Discussing popular games like Clash of Clans, Fortnite, and Mortal Kombat, Tom notes at [79:10] “‘Players of Mortal Kombat, known for violent combat, showed higher levels of aggression…’” while Christy expresses skepticism about causation versus correlation, emphasizing the complexity of behavioral influences.

CIA’s Covert Connections with Star Wars

In an intriguing twist, Tom reveals [143:03] “‘A new report out there reveals the CIA operated a Star Wars fan website as part of a covert global communication network.’” detailing how seemingly innocuous websites were utilized for secure messaging among intelligence operatives. This revelation adds a layer of espionage intrigue to the beloved franchise.

Snoop Dogg’s Artistic Venture with Roaches

The hosts discuss Snoop Dogg’s latest artistic endeavor where he collaborates with artist Erica Kovitz to transform his marijuana roaches into art pieces. Tom comments at [108:14] “‘He’s turning roaches into art is really lame.’” highlighting mixed reactions to the unconventional art form.

Local News: Zebra on the Loose in Tennessee

A bizarre local news story covers a zebra escaping and causing chaos on a Tennessee highway. Tom relays at [153:04] “‘The zebra got out Saturday afternoon in Murfreesboro…’” while Christy and Josh humorously speculate on the zebra’s motives and the challenges of capturing such an unusual escapee.

Closing Remarks

As the episode wraps up, the hosts continue their lively interaction with Dyke Michaels, sharing laughs over past experiences and brainstorming comedy special titles. The blend of humor, unexpected news, and engaging guest conversations makes this episode a memorable mix for listeners.

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Notable Quotes:

• Josh at [07:31]: “'Some days you're going to be the bird, some days you're going to be the statue.'”
• Christy at [12:19]: “'It's just absolutely terrific.'” (referencing The Three Stooges)
• Dyke Michaels at [140:13]: “'It combined two of my least favorite things, physical altercations and glitter.'”
• Tom at [79:10]: “'Players of Mortal Kombat, known for violent combat, showed higher levels of aggression…'”
• Tom at [143:03]: “'A new report out there reveals the CIA operated a Star Wars fan website as part of a covert global communication network.'”
• Tom at [108:14]: “'He’s turning roaches into art is really lame.'”

This detailed summary captures the essence of the June 3, 2025, episode of The BOB & TOM Show, highlighting key discussions, insights, and the dynamic interactions among the hosts and their guest.

Transcript

[Tom]

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[Josh]

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[Tom]

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[Josh]

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[Christy]

Sorry, do we legally have to say that?

[Josh]

No, this is just how I talk.

[Dyke Michaels]

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[Josh]

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[Dyke Michaels]

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[Josh]

For 20% off your first purchase. That's b.com listen and use code listen at checkout.

[Pat Godwin]

It'S the Bob and Tom show.

[Dyke Michaels]

Monday, Tuesday.

[Josh]

Hump day is halfway sticking in the.

[Jeff Oskay]

Pit Pop it in the bank Saturday.

[Josh]

Is coming quicker than a thing 48.

[Jeff Oskay]

To roundaboo oh, I'm gonna blow a wad on you oh oh, oh I'm coming in my pants.

[Josh]

And my necktie.

[Jeff Oskay]

Honey I'm so excited I hope that.

[Tom]

I don't.

[Jeff Oskay]

I can't move on attention is long gone.

[Josh]

Suits our prayers while it's in shape the only thing left.

[Tom]

Is a little manscape 20 foot around.

[Jeff Oskay]

A I can't wait I can't wait I'm gonna blow a wad on you oh oh, oh I'm coming in my pants my shirt is my best suit living going to pick your flower going to be there in an hour coming up and shine shoes and my neck Honey I'm so excited I hope that.

[Christy]

I don't.

[Josh]

24 around a.

[Jeff Oskay]

Gonna blow.

[Josh]

A water on you 24 around a.

[Jeff Oskay]

I'm gonna blow a water on you oh oh, oh I'm coming in my pants my s is my best suit baby gonna pick your flower gonna be there in an hour coming up and shy shoes and my necktie honey I'm I'm so excited you know I can't wait for you I'm so excited you know I can't wait for you I'm so excited I hope that I don't.

[Tom]

Come and.

[Josh]

Od.

[Tom]

Oh yeah.

[Josh]

Fantastic.

[Pat Godwin]

Here come the movies.

[Christy]

Ah, fantastic indeed. Hope you're fantastic. We sure are Here at the Bob and Tom show, live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. I like to let them sing and let it breathe while they perform for us.

[Tom]

Like a good wine. Let it.

[Pat Godwin]

Yes.

[Christy]

Christy Lee is the Silage Insurance Company news desk. Hi, there's Pat Godwin. Hello, and bless you, by the way.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, I'm having an attack over here.

[Christy]

Oh, Jeff, Oskar's over there.

[Josh]

Hey, buddy.

[Christy]

There's Ace Cosby. Hey, I'm Josh Arnold. And there he is, Thomas Griswold.

[Josh]

Okay, thank you very much, and hello. Hope everyone is doing great. Got a stack of mail. A lot of interesting things happening in the world. We'll cover only the fun stuff.

[Christy]

Yeah, let's do that.

[Josh]

Yeah, let's. So it's gonna be a short show.

[Christy]

Oh, there's plenty of fun out there.

[Josh]

And I.

[Christy]

And in here.

[Josh]

Yeah. I've got a letter that really kind of gets right to the essence of life.

[Christy]

Okay.

[Josh]

Which is what we like to do. This comes to us from a js. We'll call him Jizz for short. I was hoping for a clean start, you know, like a. You know, just a. Yeah. John is his first name.

[Christy]

Oh, oh, Johnny Jizz.

[Josh]

Okay. That would be jj, wouldn't it?

[Jeff Oskay]

Or you don't have to call me.

[Christy]

Especially if it means.

[Josh]

Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Where was I? Oh, he's. He's referencing his father because we have Father's Day coming up, of course.

[Christy]

Oh, yeah.

[Josh]

And we've been talking a lot about phrases perhaps your dad might say, you know, in a moment of fatigue, wisdom just emerges. My dad was having a bad day. When he would have a bad day, he would say, son, some days you're going to be the bird, some days you're going to be the statue. Yeah, that is. Yeah, that is some wisdom. Hope you had a bird day yesterday as opposed to a statue day. But if everybody.

[Tom]

Okay, everybody yesterday.

[Josh]

Good bird day.

[Jeff Oskay]

Good bird.

[Pat Godwin]

A lot of birds yesterday still have all your feeders.

[Tom]

Yeah. Because they take a minute night. Now, those raccoons got nothing.

[Pat Godwin]

Someone wrote in yesterday, they said, christie, zip tie them to the post. And they. That solved their problem.

[Tom]

Oh, okay.

[Josh]

So once again, Christie's bird feeders being attacked by.

[Jeff Oskay]

Stolen.

[Josh]

Yeah, stolen.

[Tom]

They're not just being attacked.

[Josh]

They've been taken down.

[Tom]

Taken. Yeah.

[Josh]

Do you have to take them down to fill them with bird seed?

[Tom]

Yes.

[Josh]

Okay, so they're. That. That's a problem.

[Tom]

So if I zip tie them, how am I going to feel? Fill them.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, no, man. I'm just telling you what the listeners.

[Jeff Oskay]

Work out the details.

[Josh]

Yeah, I didn't take a wire cutter.

[Pat Godwin]

Math.

[Josh]

Zip ties are cheap.

[Tom]

It's okay. The birds sleep, so, you know, they aren't missing anything.

[Josh]

Problem with feeding birds is now you have bird poop everywhere.

[Tom]

I have a lot of woods. It doesn't matter.

[Christy]

I don't have that trouble either.

[Tom]

Yeah, I don't either. I don't.

[Josh]

I don't have a bird feeder. I got bird poop everywhere.

[Tom]

Well, maybe if you fed your birds, they wouldn't poop there.

[Christy]

They're sending you a message.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, buy better food.

[Jeff Oskay]

Revengeful crows.

[Josh]

As for the. As for the raccoons, have you considered getting nice pellet gun?

[Tom]

Well, I have not seen them. I just hear them. I think it's a bear, but.

[Josh]

Yeah, that would be great.

[Tom]

It sounds like a bear. It doesn't sound like raccoons. It's, like, huge.

[Josh]

Wait a second. I have. Let me just find this story real quick. To begin with, a little news story. Authorities in Florida say a bear was found napping in the lobby of a condominium.

[Tom]

Wouldn't that be great?

[Josh]

This is in Naples. Yeah, my brothers live there. Naples police said officers responding to a report of a black bear taking a nap in the building's lobby was. Wow, that's hilarious.

[Christy]

Well, unless you live there.

[Tom]

He's an upscale bear. He knows where to hang.

[Josh]

Oh, let's see.

[Christy]

Nice couch. Maybe some Muzak playing, relaxing.

[Josh]

I hope it wasn't my brother's condo.

[Tom]

It might have, like, water with the lemons and the oranges in it.

[Christy]

Yes.

[Jeff Oskay]

Cucumber water.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Josh]

Let's see. Apparently, according to Florida law, it has squatters rights, so I guess.

[Christy]

There you go.

[Tom]

Do we have bears here? Check local listings.

[Josh]

Yeah, there are bears. Of course. I think there are bears in almost every state.

[Tom]

Really?

[Josh]

I think. I believe there are deer in every state, including Hawaii. Right?

[Tom]

Oh, deer are everywhere.

[Josh]

I see deer all the time.

[Tom]

Yeah, we have. Yeah, black bears. Not native, but. Oh, they are native to our state.

[Josh]

Now, bears. Bears are very common in Florida, especially in Miami beach during Pride month. As you know, Josh, you get a lot of.

[Christy]

Oh, yeah, yeah, I'm considered a bear.

[Pat Godwin]

A few otters, yes.

[Jeff Oskay]

Call me Otter.

[Josh]

Don't call me Otter.

[Jeff Oskay]

Don't call me.

[Josh]

Sounds like a good song. We'd love to hear from you. You can email us bob and tomobandtom.com. by the way, this letter from JS continues. And it says, I knew a man who would refer to an older woman's mommy parts as the dusty Monkey.

[Tom]

Oh, careful.

[Jeff Oskay]

That's enjoy your stew.

[Josh]

Yeah, that the welcome. I remember referencing you. What was the reference? A three day old Big Mac on the refrigerator.

[Tom]

Oh, come on.

[Josh]

Hey look, I'm just doing what Jeff does. I'm just passing along the wisdom of various listeners out there. Jeff Oski sitting in for Chick Magee who is still on vacation in Aruba. Do we have any updates?

[Tom]

Yes, I think.

[Jeff Oskay]

Is there a new photo out there?

[Tom]

Yesterday they were at the beach. He had seagull pictures.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh yeah, I saw he was the grand marshal in a parade yesterday which I thought was pretty awesome. Leading the way.

[Tom]

Yeah, I know they did. They did the mural tour which was big. Yeah. Oh God, I have a lot of murals in Aruba.

[Josh]

I'd be in a casket already being shipped home. Yeah, he didn't want to get sunburned, just took himself out. Let's see now.

[Tom]

Was he in the parade or was he getting married?

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, we'll find out when he gets back.

[Tom]

Who knows?

[Josh]

I know they don't have that much alcohol in Aruba. Am I reading that correctly?

[Tom]

What?

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, that's our guess.

[Tom]

That's what I said too.

[Jeff Oskay]

Before we say it, maybe we should check if it's.

[Christy]

Yeah, well Oscar knows him.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, he's a very funny comedian. Dyke Michaels.

[Christy]

His first name is.

[Tom]

His first name is Dyke.

[Pat Godwin]

That is his birth given day.

[Jeff Oskay]

Van Dyke.

[Christy]

I'm sure he'll have something to say about it.

[Tom]

I'm sure he's not been teased about that.

[Jeff Oskay]

His first 10 minutes.

[Christy]

Yeah, it's gotta be.

[Josh]

We'll be getting a gig opening for a number of. Nevermind. Let's just move forward here. We've been talking a little bit about the Three Stooges on the show because we had an interesting event happened the other day. The, the. The last living daughter of Curly Howard from the Three Stooges has passed away. Yeah. So we got talking about that and not everyone is a Three Stooges fan of. I know I certainly am. And just to give you a little taste of the Stooges. Make you feel good.

[Christy]

Yeah.

[Josh]

Nice. Symphonic. Oh, that's so nice. The Three Stooges. That it kicks in. But the great horn section. I, I keep referencing the one episode where in which Curly is us pretending to sing the opera.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, that's great.

[Josh]

And how great it is. Yeah. Someone let me know. It's called Microphonies is the name of that episode and it's just absolutely terrific. If you get a chance, I'm going to see if I can dig up some of the. Some of the singing from that, it.

[Christy]

Would just be an opera song.

[Josh]

Yeah, but it's a real singer.

[Christy]

Yeah, I know, but the joke is that it's Curly in a dress.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Christy]

So on the radio, though, we would just hear a lady singing opera.

[Josh]

Okay, so the next time you do something that is visual at all, I'm asking people to use their imagination.

[Christy]

I kind of thought it was this kind of morning.

[Jeff Oskay]

It's gonna be the.

[Josh]

Well, we'll find out more.

[Tom]

By the way, it says remove bird feeders and feed where bears are active. So see? Yeah, Definitely be a bear. We don't know.

[Jeff Oskay]

Black bear, right?

[Tom]

Yeah, black bear.

[Jeff Oskay]

If it's black, don't look back. What are the. What's the saying?

[Christy]

They'll fight, right? Fight back.

[Josh]

You.

[Christy]

You make up as much noise as you can.

[Jeff Oskay]

Fight back.

[Christy]

I mean, don't run up to it and try to punch it. Just make as much noise as you can.

[Jeff Oskay]

Brown, lay down.

[Christy]

Yes.

[Josh]

These are the dumbest rules.

[Christy]

Yeah, well, I think they'll save your.

[Josh]

Life if you can remember. Yeah, that's the thing, sir.

[Jeff Oskay]

Grizzly slopes.

[Tom]

What if you get him backwards?

[Josh]

What is it?

[Christy]

Brown lay down.

[Josh]

White no fright. Grizzly.

[Tom]

White is good night because you're dead.

[Jeff Oskay]

Good night.

[Josh]

What is it now? Brown lie down. What is it? Huh?

[Christy]

Yeah. Play dead. And black fight back, essentially. Yeah. Make as much noise. Make a. Make a racket.

[Jeff Oskay]

Plaid. Get mad. You'll occasionally find a plaid.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Christy]

Those plant bears. Yeah, yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

If they're wearing plaid, you got a chance. Get mad.

[Christy]

Smokey Bear wears a plaid every.

[Jeff Oskay]

Now, Abs, let's weissen.

[Josh]

These weeds are all very helpful. Now, I want to say we have one more letter here involving our friends at Java House.

[Tom]

I love them.

[Josh]

Perfect timing, actually, because this portion of the Bob and Tom show is brought to you by Java House. Got this from Ronald. He writes, I got my starter pack with Coco. 60 pods, total hot water, cold water, even no water. I shoot them straight. Oh. Hmm. That's interesting. So here's the. The. What am I talking about? I guess I want to say that right now. I'm talking about Java House, the revolution in coffee. This is Can. This could be for your office, for your house, for your traveling, whatever it is. Here we go. Here's one of the pods right here. It says, amazingly smooth. I know. This is radio. You can't see it, so I'll describe it. It looks like a Keurig thing, but you don't have to put it in the machine. It's just concentrated. In this case, cold brew. Amazingly Smooth Columbia media roast, Colombian medium roast. And you can pop this in to hot water or put it on ice, whatever you want to do. Now Java House has the famous peel and pour pods that are revolutionizing coffee everywhere. And they also have, as I mentioned, hydration drinks, lattes, tea, which is what I'm drinking right now, energy drinks and of course, the famous hot cocoa. It's the perfect solution for your office break room. We have it here in the Bob and Tom studios and in our break room right next door. And we love it. So check it out. It's Java House. Now, the letter I have here, the special sample pack. Find out all the [e-mail] and also click on the Java House for your office tab and sign up for a free in office demo. That's Java House.com take a break from the office brewing contraption and check out Java House. Once again. It's not just coffee. Coffee, tea, lattes, energy drinks, hydration drinks and more all from Java House, the official coffee and the official beverages of the Bob and Tom Show. Coming up in sports, getting ready for the NBA finals. It's been a long season. It's going to be a lot of fun in the next couple of weeks. Also coming up in the news we have NFL news. In the marriage department, we have Mackinac Bridge news. Plus we have marijuana once again in the news a couple times, including with the famous Snoop Dogg and a world record that is going to touch your heart, I promise you. I'll just do a little singing right now. Reunited, we are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show. Make this your best season yet with nutritious 2 minute meals from Factor. Eating well has never been this easy. Just heat up and enjoy, giving you more time to do what you want.

[Tom]

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[Josh]

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[Christy]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom show live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Think O'Reilly Auto Parts for all your car care needs. Get the parts and service you need fast from the professional parts people at O'Reilly Auto Parts. Christy Lee, Pat Godwin, Jeff Oskay. Having a morning do.

[Tom]

Oh, that's right.

[Christy]

You are down to one Mountain Dew a day.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah. But on yes. For the most part.

[Christy]

Okay.

[Tom]

Tom's gonna give you the lecture now.

[Pat Godwin]

There's.

[Jeff Oskay]

We're gonna hear the dentist story.

[Christy]

There's Ace Cosby.

[Pat Godwin]

I don't have any teeth left to fall out.

[Jeff Oskay]

There you go.

[Josh]

I know.

[Christy]

I'm Josh. There's Tom.

[Josh]

I know a very good guy that can give you a nice set of dentures.

[Pat Godwin]

Great.

[Josh]

You wouldn't be the first pair that I bought.

[Christy]

I. I used to be a big Mountain Dew guy in my 20s. I haven't had one in probably 10 plus years.

[Jeff Oskay]

Years. Same here.

[Pat Godwin]

I'm trying to do one pop a day every once in a while. Like yesterday I had two.

[Christy]

Okay.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah. For the most part I'm down to like one a day.

[Christy]

Is it exclusively Mountain Dew, would you say?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah. I have one when I get in in the morning and I switch to sparkling water the rest of the day. But I was at like 10 Mountain Dews a day.

[Christy]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

And so I'm pretty proud I got down to one.

[Tom]

You should be.

[Christy]

It's hard.

[Josh]

Yeah. Do you ever drink the sugar free Mountain Dew?

[Pat Godwin]

No. You ever smoke the cocaine free crack? No. That's the point.

[Josh]

I will not give you the Mountain Dew lecture. Sure. It's.

[Tom]

Huh. I kind of did.

[Josh]

I hate the taste of it.

[Christy]

Gotcha.

[Josh]

Always have.

[Christy]

Yeah. There are people out there. The real.

[Tom]

I'm not a fan either.

[Josh]

Give me a Coke. You know, the way God intended.

[Tom]

I like coke. Zero. I become addicted to that.

[Christy]

It's. They've really done.

[Jeff Oskay]

They got it down.

[Tom]

They do have it down, man.

[Christy]

Yeah.

[Josh]

There was a time when I would drink nothing but coke instead of water.

[Tom]

Y. Caffeine free Coke. I remember then.

[Josh]

Then I. Then I phased phase into that. Yeah. Then yeah. Caffeine free diet Coke. Why not just have soda water call it a day.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Josh]

But good luck. Glad you're done. Just, just, just the one I'm trying.

[Tom]

What is your new thing use you're very good about? Oh, it's salmon salad for six months and then you change to something else. What is your new.

[Josh]

Lately I've been skipping meals. Oh.

[Tom]

All right. There you go.

[Josh]

I'VE been eating all that much lately. It's a fair question. I don't know. I'm off sushi. Just don't. Suddenly I can't stand it.

[Jeff Oskay]

That doesn't make any sense.

[Josh]

I know.

[Tom]

It doesn't, right?

[Josh]

I don't like it.

[Tom]

Well, that's just like caffeine free Diet Coke. You drink it every day and then boom, done.

[Josh]

Yeah, currently a little java house tea.

[Tom]

Yeah, okay.

[Josh]

That's about it. But my old staples, of course, Grape Nuts and Corn Flakes. Once again, Kellogg's Cornflakes. Yeah, I tried those organic ones and no good.

[Jeff Oskay]

No sugar. No, just Corn flakes. No sugar.

[Josh]

I put. I may put some fake sugar on them, like.

[Tom]

Nice blender. There you go.

[Josh]

There you go.

[Christy]

You ever put cornflakes on your pork.

[Tom]

Chops like a crust? Yeah, that sounds like a good idea.

[Christy]

I know people that did it.

[Pat Godwin]

Maggie does a cornflake chicken.

[Christy]

Ah, okay.

[Pat Godwin]

Amazing.

[Josh]

Oh, does she bake it?

[Tom]

That sounds great.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah. And it's got that nice crunch of the corn flakes.

[Josh]

I'm getting hungry. Let's, let's. I thought we would shake things up today by beginning the show with today in history.

[Christy]

Shake it up.

[Josh]

And I have not looked at this, so I don't know if it's a particularly exciting day in history. Oh, here we go. That's a good start. In 1800, President John Adams moved into a tavern.

[Christy]

Wow.

[Josh]

Washington, D.C. his wife would say, why.

[Christy]

Don'T you just live there?

[Jeff Oskay]

If you're just gonna hang out there.

[Tom]

All night, why just move in? All right.

[Jeff Oskay]

Marry the bartender.

[Josh]

Admittedly, that was my goal right after college. Is there a way I can actually live in a bar?

[Christy]

I would pay $50 to? Pat Godwin is Mrs. Adams. And it's just a one man.

[Josh]

A one woman man show. A one man woman show.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, I missed the President.

[Jeff Oskay]

I could have. I could have married Washington. You know, I don't need the second best stuff.

[Josh]

Let's see what else happened on this state in history.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, wow.

[Josh]

There's a big skip here. By the way, do you think that you calling it a tavern? I like it a little classier than you get moving into a bar. Yes, it does.

[Tom]

Yeah, I agree.

[Josh]

I remember when my son Sam was very English. My son Sam was born and I. I wanted to name him Duke. And my mother said, that sounds like he's a tavern owner.

[Christy]

I love that so much.

[Josh]

But that's Sam's underground name though.

[Tom]

Is it Duke?

[Josh]

Yeah. Duke Samuels. Yeah. Absolutely.

[Christy]

Yeah. Public house is funny too.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Christy]

Shortened the pub, but. Yeah, I'm just. I didn't. I wasn't.

[Tom]

I was.

[Christy]

I was at the public house.

[Josh]

I'm sure there's a. There's got to be a reason that John Adams moved into a bar. There must have been construction at his place. That might be the only way. Ladies, if you're listening, the only way to get your husband to allow you to do that remodel job. Okay, look, we have to move into a bar for six months. Oh, wait a minute. This. This sounds reasonable. It says he was the first American president to move into the new capital city. When he arrived, the streets had yet to be paved and major government buildings were under construction. I'll bet it smelled bad.

[Christy]

Oh, I bet, too. Yeah.

[Josh]

Or spoop everywhere. Now we turn to 1956 in history. This is interesting. Rock and roll band in Santa Cruz, California.

[Tom]

What?

[Josh]

Hope they've lifted the band.

[Tom]

Yeah, me too.

[Josh]

That back in 56 when, you know, it was the devil's music. Yeah, okay. Speaking of the devil, the Rolling Stones began their first US tour in the state in 1964. Wow. Think about that. That goes way back.

[Tom]

Yeah, it does.

[Josh]

And then in 65, the first American astronaut did a spacewalk. Anybody remember who it was? I don't.

[Tom]

I do, but go ahead. White.

[Josh]

Very good, Ed White. How did you remember that?

[Tom]

Because it's written right here on my shoe.

[Josh]

Oh, you have a shoe, Little Dev.

[Tom]

In fact, I'm surprised you missed this one. You're gonna hate me, Jeff. In 1888, the poem Casey at Bat by Ernest Lawrence was first published.

[Josh]

Ah, there is no joy in Mudville.

[Tom]

Yes, mighty Casey has struck. I had never heard Casey at the bat till you brought it up.

[Josh]

That's what's wrong with American education.

[Tom]

Really?

[Josh]

That's.

[Christy]

You don't think they're teaching it still?

[Josh]

Probably not.

[Pat Godwin]

His earlier poem, Casey at the Plantation, was not nearly as popular.

[Christy]

No, no. His.

[Josh]

No, I remember that. I think the first line, or the. One of the main lines is. There was ease in Casey's manner as he walked up to the plate.

[Christy]

Oh, he was a confident man.

[Josh]

He.

[Christy]

I mean, he. Always at home.

[Josh]

Yeah. Yeah. It's a great poem. Okay, I. I don't have it in.

[Tom]

Front of me, but I know you love it. That's right.

[Jeff Oskay]

We were forced to read it out loud.

[Josh]

Forced. Really forced.

[Christy]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

I didn't want it.

[Josh]

So it's happy, it's fun, it's pleasant. It's about baseball.

[Tom]

I never read it. I don't now.

[Josh]

Conversely, today's the birthday of Allen Ginsberg. The. The. What do you call it? Beat era poet.

[Christy]

Yeah.

[Josh]

Who cheated by never rhyming anything. Oh, that's great. You're too smart to rhyme. None of that rookie rookie rhyming stuff. The best minds of my generation. His life didn't end real well. All that man, that man boy stuff. Lost a little popular. Hear about that? No, the less you know, the better.

[Tom]

Okay.

[Josh]

On a much happier note, by the ginsburg, born in 1926. And much happier. Boots Randolph. Oh, that is born in this date in. In 1927. And Boots, of course. Most famous for the. The absolute classic yakety saxophone.

[Tom]

Oh yeah. Benny Hill fans will know it.

[Josh]

Which has been adopted by many, many a comedian. Here we go. A little bit.

[Pat Godwin]

I can't hear the song without picturing a bunch of scantily clad women running around real quick.

[Christy]

Oh yeah.

[Tom]

With that little bald headed guy.

[Josh]

Yeah, yeah.

[Christy]

Every now and again Benny would stop just to slap him on the head. Yeah, yeah.

[Josh]

There's a certain. What's the word I'm looking for? Non consensual component to the. What is the end game.

[Christy]

I own them all. Yes. I have a big ass DVD collection.

[Jeff Oskay]

You know the one with the arm and the wrist. It's a fake cat. And he's pitching every girl with his real hand.

[Christy]

Right, right.

[Jeff Oskay]

Molesting 12 women.

[Josh]

No.

[Christy]

Enjoying himself. And they don't. They're fine.

[Jeff Oskay]

They'll go.

[Christy]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

He's got a cast on. Fake arm.

[Josh]

Happy birth. A news broadcaster. Anderson Cooper.

[Tom]

Wait, you missed one. Who did I miss turning 75 today? Our famous Susie Quattro. Nice. 75. Who's the dude singing?

[Jeff Oskay]

He's good though. I don't know his name. I just saw a live version of this with them. He's real good. No idea who he is.

[Pat Godwin]

I have no idea how to fade this out. You gotta listen to the whole thing.

[Tom]

Stop it, stop it.

[Josh]

There we go. There we go. That was her only hit, right?

[Tom]

I don't know. Ace was her only.

[Christy]

I heard something else.

[Tom]

Chris Norman is Chris Norman.

[Christy]

I think she did some covers.

[Tom]

Okay.

[Josh]

75. She's officially Susie Cinco. Well, if. If not sex though, what is next? I don't know.

[Christy]

Siete.

[Josh]

Who cares? I don't speak.

[Christy]

Oh, you.

[Josh]

I'm protesting. Happy birthday.

[Christy]

I ask a question, I get an answer and I. Then I know.

[Tom]

Who cares?

[Christy]

I would have guessed the question. Asker care.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Josh]

Chuck Barris, who was the Gong show guy. Yes. Very awkward game show host. He wrote the awful song Palisades. Part Freddie Cannon, Palisades Park.

[Christy]

It's very insistent.

[Josh]

Yeah. There's a weird movie about him where he said he was in the.

[Christy]

Well, he wrote his autobiography in the FBI.

[Tom]

CIA.

[Christy]

He claims he was a CIA operative that whole time.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Christy]

Fascinating.

[Josh]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom]

You believe it?

[Josh]

Not a word of it.

[Tom]

Okay.

[Josh]

That's pretty much all the interesting stuff going on in history, so thank you very much. Unless you have more. Christy, you obviously have chance, a different source than I do.

[Tom]

No, that's it, really. Nadal is 39 today. He's a good tennis player. He's probably mentioning him. Yeah.

[Josh]

Yeah. Oh, here we go.

[Christy]

Is he in the French Open?

[Tom]

I don't know.

[Christy]

Yeah, I don't know either.

[Tom]

I don't know.

[Jeff Oskay]

I don't care.

[Josh]

Yeah, this is. The rest of the rest of this stuff's just too depressing.

[Tom]

Yeah, Some of it was pretty.

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

I met Chuck Barris. That's. That was a fun.

[Tom]

Did you really?

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, When I was very young.

[Tom]

Did you do the Gong Show?

[Jeff Oskay]

I auditioned for it, yeah. In 77. I auditioned for it as a. And I did my bit. Was Elvis as an old man. Elvis. I got the show and then Elvis then died in August. And I auditioned, like, in June. Oh, and much met Chuck Barris at the Old World Restaurant in Coenga Boulevard in California. And he was very nice. He had a Martin guitar hanging on the wall. And he couldn't have been nicer during your audition.

[Christy]

Oh, very good.

[Tom]

So you got the show, but then.

[Josh]

You were in high school.

[Jeff Oskay]

I was in high kid. No, I was a year out of high school. And I put, like, stuff on my hair to make it white. And I patted my gut and I did know I'm all messed up.

[Tom]

And then he died.

[Jeff Oskay]

He died. He said, that's very funny. And I didn't know how to play guitar. He said, learn how to play guitar. And so I did a couple chords, came back in July, and then Elvis died.

[Christy]

Oh, man. And they were like, well, we can't do that.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Josh]

The famous story about the Hollywood guy poolside when he found out that Elvis died. The famous quote was good career move.

[Jeff Oskay]

Well, it certainly was.

[Tom]

You could have done Elvis.

[Christy]

So, so sad, cynical business.

[Josh]

In the beginning, Elvis was great.

[Jeff Oskay]

That was the same year that Bob Zany did his. Yeah, we're about the same age. Yeah.

[Tom]

Oh, well.

[Josh]

Can you play your Elvis song for. Why don't you play your Elvis tribute?

[Jeff Oskay]

I think I did. I. What I actually did was. Was this. Well, you know, Elvis. Elvis is. Is getting old now. This Is Elvis's. This is what Elvis is going through now with all the focus on the future. Blessing my soul. What's wrong with me? I took some mana pills that I can't even see. I hope I don't choke. I won't throw up. I'm on drugs. I'm all messed up. Something like that. Oh, I don't think I did the drugs thing, though. I was. That's what was in my act later.

[Josh]

Ah, he's all bound up.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

All bound up.

[Josh]

Yeah. Yeah. 17 pounds of impact.

[Tom]

Eat your fiber. See, he didn't eat his wife.

[Josh]

Well, I think if there are certain things that slow down the digestive system, as we all know. Well, thank you. Maybe we can get another song out of you, Pat. I have a little challenge for the audience. Pat is about to release his comedy special on the Dry bar. And it needs a title.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, by like now. And I have nothing.

[Josh]

If you have an idea for Pat's album title, now you're. You're. Excuse me. Your album is called Hotel Pool.

[Christy]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

The special is Squeaky Clean. It's a lot of the songs from Hotel Pool and Steal My Identity and things like that. A lot of the bits.

[Tom]

What about Squeaky Clean?

[Jeff Oskay]

I said squeaky clean. But I mean, I think that's been used a lot. Maybe.

[Christy]

What about Clean and Sober?

[Jeff Oskay]

Clean and Sober. That's a little. Little serious since they don't talk. You're not even allowed to talk about alcohol on that particular special. Maybe not. Oh, you came and say sober.

[Tom]

Really?

[Jeff Oskay]

I'm pretty sure.

[Josh]

Oh, well, if anyone has any ideas.

[Jeff Oskay]

Clean and Jerk.

[Josh]

I think I wouldn't go. Clean and jerk. What have you. Self deprecating, self defecating.

[Tom]

Good clean fun.

[Jeff Oskay]

Good clean fun.

[Josh]

It probably used a lot. Maybe just. We'll come up with something. But maybe someone has a great idea out there. What's the matter?

[Tom]

We're just throwing things out.

[Josh]

I know. And I. I think the most important thing when you do this is having a waste basket nearby. That's the most creative enterprise is the most important.

[Christy]

No, it's just cute that you invited us all to take part, including the listeners. And we all know how this is going to work.

[Tom]

Yeah, you're gonna pick it, so you might as well just pick it.

[Christy]

It's adorable when you pretend that democracy exists.

[Jeff Oskay]

Poor Christie's just trying to play along.

[Josh]

That sucks. As you know, I am a firm non believer in democracy.

[Tom]

Now we know.

[Josh]

Big mistake. Right now I want to let you know. But Chick Magee did something. He brought to my attention, Simplisafe, he came in here one Monday morning and said, you know what I did over the weekend? I installed a great security system at my house. I did it myself. Took less than an hour. Well, SimpliSafe isn't just about simple installation. SimpliSafe is about just the sort of the simple idea that great security doesn't have to be very complicated. Cameras here, alarms there, you pick them and if you don't want to install it yourself, they can set you up with someone that can do it for you. And SimpliSafe has all kinds of options. Cameras and something called active guard outdoor protection that actually uses AI powered cameras with incredible technology to monitor the surroundings of your place and let you know if anybody's lurking around out there and can even make announcements to them going, hey, hey, we're right here, we know you're coming and deter crimes, et cetera, et cetera. So find out what I'm talking about. Visit simplisafetom.com find out about all the things you can do to help you keep your property secure. If somebody's lurking, agents can actually, like I said, say hello and goodbye and the police are coming, et cetera, et cetera. By the way, SimpliSafe voted the best home security system of the year 2252025 by CNET already. So that just shows you something. 4 million plus Americans trust SimpliSafe ranked number one in customer service by Newsweek and USA Today. Monitoring plans start at just about a buck a day. By the way, there's also a 60 day money back guarantee from SimpliSafe. So give it a shot. Try it out. And by the way, if you go to simplisafetom.com today, you can claim 50% off a new system with a professional monitoring plan. Also, get your first month for free. Got that? Simply safe tom.com there's no safe like Simply Safe. Visit them@simply safetom.com Coming up, some sporting news. We have a wedding in the NFL. We have. Is grandpa smoking too much pot? We'll find out. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show. This is the Bob and Tom Show. Reach us toll free at 1-888-bobtom1 [e-mail].

[Dyke Michaels]

This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Josh]

Foreign this episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Fiscally responsible financial geniuses, monetary magicians.

[Pat Godwin]

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[Josh]

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[Jeff Oskay]

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[Josh]

For Thursday, it'll be awesome.

[Christy]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom show live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Christy, Patrick, Jeff Oste's here. There's Ace Cosby. I'm Josh. And there's Tom.

[Josh]

Thank you very much, Josh.

[Christy]

You're welcome.

[Josh]

Coming up in the news, a couple of my favorite things. Mackinac Bridge News.

[Tom]

Oh, God. Michigan.

[Josh]

Is it good news? Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Okay.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Josh]

Kind of fun news. We have a bizarre story involving the movie Star wars and the CIA. Oh, that's really, really odd. And then I think possibly the worst nightmare one can have.

[Christy]

Oh, no.

[Josh]

Involving using a portable toilet in a public place. The worst case scenario. There's a lot of bad things you can have that can have this.

[Tom]

This is bad.

[Josh]

This. This may top them all. But we'll begin by shifting gears and discussing the sporting scene. Jeff, Oscar sitting in for a chick. Oh, yeah, I got a couple. Do you have one? Go. You go ahead.

[Tom]

Well, of course, this is all about me. Big thank you to Christy. This is from Nelson for the Merlin app suggestion. I am now able to ID around 10 bird species by sound alone.

[Josh]

What is this again?

[Christy]

He said clearly interested.

[Tom]

Cornell University has a app that you can download onto your phone and it will identify birds just by the sound. You record the sound and then you play it in the in the app and it tells you what bird it is.

[Josh]

Oh, do they have one I can use on my car, like a Rorschach thing telling me which bird is crapping all over my white car?

[Tom]

And speaking of that, I guess you can eat Canada geese. Oh, we had a couple of people here. This is from Peggy and Steve. Hi, guys. Yes, you can eat Canada geese. There's a hunting season here in Canada, but it should be year round. Love your show. This is from Tom in Clear Lake, Iowa. Yes, you can eat Canada geese. When I was younger, we would hunt them every fall in Iowa. The meat is very lean and tasty when prepared correctly.

[Josh]

How about that? They would hunt them.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Christy]

Aren't they protected here?

[Tom]

They're protected in some states, I guess. I don't know.

[Josh]

They're annoying and they poop everywhere.

[Christy]

I think they're so funny.

[Tom]

You can put a goose in the oven, cook the Breasts in a crock pot. Or skewer them with some veggies on the grill. There you go.

[Jeff Oskay]

You can eat Canadian geese and you can drink Canada Dr. Hi. Hello.

[Josh]

And apparently, they're not Canadian geese. They're Canada geese. Canada geese.

[Pat Godwin]

We had multiple people write in yesterday saying they make great jerky.

[Tom]

Really?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, I guess. I guess goose jerky is a thing.

[Josh]

We'll make more of it, so get rid of.

[Tom]

Thank you, Tom. There you go.

[Josh]

Sick of them now. For some reason, washing baseball caps has become a big topic. And Kevin writes, throw your ball cap in the washing machine with all your other clothes. Don't put it in the dryer. That's exactly what I would do. He puts it on a hat rack. Mold. I've had the Same one for 20 years. Keeps them from shrinking. I just hang them off with a clothespin. Just throw them in. If you put them in the dryer, though, the fabric around the brim will shrink and pop through.

[Tom]

Yeah, but that's cool now to have that.

[Christy]

I kind of like that frayed brim.

[Josh]

I got one in my office mistakenly put in the dryer. Well, thank you very much for the tip, Kevin. And yeah, you got to wash these things because they start to stink, especially in the summer.

[Christy]

Yeah, I'm not. I have so many hats, I just get rid of it. It's not.

[Josh]

You throw them away.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Christy]

Of course, if one gets crazy, I mean, you get. You get a free hat walking.

[Tom]

Boy, the trucker hats are really popular right now, especially with the ladies like them. Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

I like a lady in a trucker hat.

[Tom]

Do you?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah. When they pull the ponytail through the little back.

[Jeff Oskay]

That is cute.

[Josh]

Hello, boys.

[Pat Godwin]

Hi.

[Josh]

I heard you guys talk about the song Locomotive Breath. I was not familiar with it. It's amazing.

[Christy]

Oh, good. Glad you like it.

[Josh]

Yeah. We were talking about this movie idea we have that involves the guy driving along the highway and all. He's. It turns out he's naked. But you don't know that in the beginning. You just see his hat drying on the. His. I'm sorry. His shorts drying on the rear view mirror as he cruises down the highway after swimming in a granite pit. It's just awesome. Yeah. Locomotive Breath by Jethro Tull. Highly recommended record. If you're not familiar with it, Aqua Long is really something. And Ian Anderson plays a mean flute. Yeah, we were also. Wow. Oh. Who was complaining about the recorder? Was that you?

[Tom]

Me? I wasn't complaining. I just wondered who had the recorder market, because it seems like that's. That's the first thing you're forced to play a recorder.

[Josh]

It's great. It's an inexpensive instrument. It's. It's relatively simple to play, and you can learn music basics.

[Tom]

Somebody's making a hell of a lot of money. That's all I'm saying.

[Josh]

Recorders are really inexpensive.

[Tom]

Well, it doesn't matter if you sell 80 billion of them.

[Pat Godwin]

Exactly.

[Josh]

Listen, why don't you go to the Soviet Union? If that will involve a time machine. The point is these commies, okay?

[Christy]

The point is these commies.

[Josh]

You couldn't afford a reporter. Let's see now. Hello, Tom. I sit on top of this mountain in the dark, logging trees for your next child's house. Oh, that's nice. This guy's working in the logging industry somewhere in the pines of Oregon. Be careful out there, Brandon. Yeah, that is some scary, dangerous and important work.

[Christy]

Yeah, it's Sasquatch country.

[Josh]

Another song, Driving naked. I recommend Deep purple smoke on the water. Thank you, Curtis with a K. Yeah, good one. Yeah, that's.

[Tom]

That's a great song. That old album is absolute go to.

[Josh]

Once again, the episode of the three stooges that I love so much with Curly Foe singing is microphonies. One of the last ones Curly was in, singing the voice of spring. Great gag. I'm gonna try to see if we can find some of that for you. And here's an odd one.

[Christy]

Will not play.

[Josh]

This is from Sue. My mother had some weird sayings when I was a kid. If she passed gas in front of the kid, she'd say, there's a kiss for you. Ooh, gross. This gets worse. If one of us farted, she'd say, your voice has changed, but your breath still smells the same.

[Christy]

Oh, yeah, I like that. Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

This is our mother.

[Josh]

Yeah. This is from Sue.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, Sue, I'm sorry.

[Josh]

Different strokes for different folks.

[Pat Godwin]

I have a letter here. We were talking about Percy yesterday. The Thomas the Tank.

[Tom]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Says, hey, Jeff. Some years ago, a guest told a story about his young son's love for Percy the train. Turned out they both have a lot of love for Percy. It's a regular bit on Bob and Tom 24 7. Thanks for being a part of the show. I roll emoji. Geez. Maybe you could do a special episode of things you forgot to remember.

[Tom]

Oh, man.

[Pat Godwin]

Thanks, Greg from El Dorado Hills, California. You jerk. Apparently we have a bit about that that I didn't know about.

[Tom]

Oh, you were relating a story that happened to you. It's okay.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, Parallel thinking But at least he wrote in.

[Josh]

Okay, I don't remember the Percy bit. What is it again?

[Pat Godwin]

Neither do I. Apparently a comedian talks about his son's love of Percy and he loves Percy.

[Christy]

As well from Thomas the Tank Engine. But when a young kid pronounces Percy.

[Tom]

It sounds like the R gets yeah, sure.

[Pat Godwin]

Whoever wrote that into the episode as a big jerk.

[Josh]

Okay, thank you. I fully unaware of that. I wish. I'm sorry you read the letter. Okay, coming up, we have a comedian, Dyke Michaels. Actually his name, you know, Dyke.

[Christy]

Yeah. Good guy.

[Josh]

Okay, good. I'm looking, looking forward to Mr. Dyke.

[Pat Godwin]

Funny dude.

[Josh]

And we'll get a song out of.

[Tom]

Mr. Gunnar to Mr. Dyke.

[Josh]

We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show. Thanks for listening. Portions of the show brought to you by Champion Windows. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Pat Godwin]

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[Tom]

That's R a k u T R en.

[Josh]

He'S installed.

[Christy]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. Christy Lee at the Silac Insurance Company news desk. Hey, Pat Godwin over there.

[Jeff Oskay]

Hello.

[Christy]

There's Jeff Oskay.

[Pat Godwin]

Hey, buddy.

[Christy]

Ace Cosby's there. Howdy. I'm Josh Arnold and Tom. Heck of a day so far.

[Josh]

Working on something? Oh, Pat Godwin has recorded a comedy special. It's on the dry bar circuit, if you will. It'll be coming out soon, but it needs a title. And Pat's most recent album was called Hotel Pool. The album before that was called Way.

[Jeff Oskay]

Back when we had Christmas bonus and we had under the Bed.

[Josh]

How about Way Back Now?

[Jeff Oskay]

They're back now. Yeah. This the material.

[Tom]

Try it. You'll like it.

[Jeff Oskay]

Try it. You'll like it.

[Pat Godwin]

How about Godwin the Wind?

[Jeff Oskay]

How about In In Godwin Trust?

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, I like that.

[Josh]

They're not going to use that.

[Christy]

What about guitar Act.

[Jeff Oskay]

You know what? I had thought about doing that and just laying it out there and doing guitar.

[Christy]

Yeah, I like it.

[Jeff Oskay]

What do you think about that?

[Tom]

I like that, too.

[Josh]

How about six strings, no waiting?

[Jeff Oskay]

How about songs in the key of.

[Josh]

Laugh.

[Christy]

If you don't do it. That is so nobody would know that you were being ironic.

[Josh]

That's the problem.

[Christy]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

They would hate it.

[Josh]

And maybe do blackface on the COVID like your Stevie Wonder. That'll get you canceled.

[Jeff Oskay]

What might get you canceled for saying.

[Josh]

For God's sake. I'm.

[Jeff Oskay]

I know you're. I don't care.

[Josh]

No one may call it. No one can take a joke anymore. Guitar act.

[Jeff Oskay]

I like it. What do you think?

[Tom]

I like Guitar Act.

[Jeff Oskay]

It's like laying it all out there.

[Josh]

Maybe do something that stresses the irony of, like, hacky.

[Christy]

Well, don't.

[Jeff Oskay]

Second time you've said that in two weeks. My feelings are hurt.

[Josh]

No, I did. You're. It's not. It's all original stuff.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

What about Pat on the back?

[Jeff Oskay]

Pat on the back?

[Tom]

Pat on the guitar.

[Jeff Oskay]

Patty. I'm Patty G. Patty G. Well, I.

[Tom]

Got nothing, so I'm Patty G. What's wrong with that?

[Jeff Oskay]

Maybe not. I don't know.

[Tom]

Are you using. Are you doing that song?

[Josh]

Wait a minute. Doesn't that open up the show?

[Jeff Oskay]

No, absolutely not.

[Josh]

Okay, never mind. Thanks to Focus. I'm Patty G. I had the word.

[Jeff Oskay]

I had the word hell in a song, and they. I couldn't use it.

[Josh]

Oh, yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

So.

[Josh]

Okay, well, so it's a clean. We'll. We'll. We'll work on something, come up with something. In the meantime, we'll check in with the sporting scene. Jeff. Oscar sitting in for Chick McGee, who's in Aruba.

[Pat Godwin]

That's right. Enjoying the.

[Tom]

He's going to be just so tan when he gets back.

[Josh]

Yes, he does tan, right?

[Tom]

Yes, he does.

[Pat Godwin]

Christy, did you see this? Buffalo Bills quarterback Josh Allen and actress Haley Steinfeld tied the knot over the weekend.

[Tom]

I did see this.

[Pat Godwin]

The couple's wedding took place in Southern California, despite the pending nuptials. Mr. Allen was present for the start of the bill's voluntary series of spring practices, which opened on Tuesday.

[Tom]

Yeah, my girls are big Josh Allen fans, so that. That was a big news in our house.

[Pat Godwin]

I don't know who. Hailee Steinfeld.

[Tom]

Yeah. You would know her probably if you saw her.

[Christy]

She was in Bumblebee. She was the young girl in True Grit. She's a. She's in a great movie called the edge of 17, which is.

[Tom]

Oh, that is a great movie.

[Pat Godwin]

I feel like celebrities shouldn't be allowed to marry other celebrities.

[Christy]

Celebrities, why?

[Pat Godwin]

Like, you should have to like, take a poor like me and lift me up like they're already doing good. You don't need to marry someone else doing good. Like find someone not doing good. Bring.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, Tom Brady's ex wife.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, I thought you're gonna say Tom Brady.

[Josh]

I was like, maybe it pays well.

[Pat Godwin]

Probably Juliet Lewis.

[Tom]

Oh, okay.

[Jeff Oskay]

She looks a little crazy.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, that's right up my alley. I like a little crazy.

[Josh]

I just like her to suck on that thumb.

[Christy]

That's a cape Fear.

[Jeff Oskay]

Me too.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, look at what we have. Stupid world record.

[Josh]

By the way, it's interesting because Josh Allen, he married what is Hailee Seinfeld. No relation to Jerry?

[Tom]

No.

[Josh]

Okay, well, she has a ring. Got that going.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Josh]

I heard Mahomes came in at the last minute and tried to steal her away.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah. No luck.

[Josh]

No.

[Pat Godwin]

David Rush and his buddy Jonathan Hannon have teamed up once again to achieve another Guinness World record title.

[Josh]

That's right, ladies and gentlemen, Hollywood Hannon back together with David Rush.

[Pat Godwin]

The pair broke the record for the most behind the back baseball catches in one minute with 39, shattering the previous record of 30. Mr. Hannon has moved to Michigan, but he returned to Idaho for a visit.

[Tom]

Wow.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah. The pair have broken over 30 Guinness World Record titles together.

[Josh]

You guys don't think this is great news?

[Christy]

I always like when buddies get back together.

[Josh]

Sure. But it's interesting because they're. I don't know, they're like 30ft apart or whatever. And David Rush is the one throwing the. Yeah, here we go. Here's a little video of it. Hollywood Hannon is the one catching him behind his back. So his. And the trick to this is David.

[Christy]

Rush is I feel like me and.

[Pat Godwin]

Josh could break this. Baseball players do that.

[Christy]

Also tougher than it looks.

[Josh]

Yeah. This is hard. And Hollywood hand is awesome. He's catching him and then heaving.

[Tom]

Really fit that Hollywood hand.

[Josh]

Yeah. So this is. But this is important.

[Christy]

There are fours of people watching.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

My audience.

[Christy]

Look at that old guy leaning against the tree.

[Tom]

There's no one around for miles.

[Christy]

Well, good for them.

[Josh]

It's a nice neighborhood. There's no traffic.

[Christy]

It does look like a cool neighborhood. It's not in England. No, no, no. It's good to hear that Rush is back on.

[Josh]

David Rush has been doing all.

[Pat Godwin]

His wife let him back in the house.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Josh]

Well, not necessarily. Yeah, right. Came over to say hi to the dog. It's great that Hollywood handed his back with. It's. It's like old friends.

[Christy]

You got a lot.

[Josh]

When Reggie said hey to Rick Smith's before game six.

[Tom]

Right.

[Josh]

To see the team back together.

[Tom]

So Hollywood Hannon's doing his own records on his own now, right? Is that.

[Josh]

Am I correct? We have received a letter. We have got. Received a letter from him, and we want to get him in here.

[Tom]

Okay.

[Pat Godwin]

He's ripped.

[Josh]

That's the thing.

[Tom]

Yeah, he was.

[Josh]

You guys. Maybe you guys could figure out a record you could do with Hollywood Hannon.

[Christy]

Oh.

[Josh]

Oh, that'd be great. Now, you remember David Rush is an expert juggler. So within this particular stunt. The key to this is that he's throwing the ball in exactly the right time.

[Christy]

They got to figure it out there.

[Josh]

You're looking at me like I'm an idiot.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, there's zero juggling to that. It's just throwing a ball at a specific place.

[Josh]

You'll recall in the. The essence of juggling is the throwing.

[Pat Godwin]

Okay. In more sporty news, the Kentucky Derby runner up and Preakness winner Journalism has opened as 8 to 5 favorite in the Belmont Stakes to close out the Triple Crown. Derby winner Sovereignty was set as the second choice at odds of 2 to 1. On Monday, journalism drew the number seven post in the field of eight horses for the second Belmont and Upstate New York Sovereignty will leave the starting gate from post number.

[Christy]

Why would they even mention the Triple Crown?

[Josh]

It's impossible, right?

[Tom]

They can't. Nobody can win the Triple Crown because he didn't run it.

[Josh]

What was the reason he didn't run?

[Tom]

I don't know why he didn't.

[Josh]

Don't think of an enormous bonus if you win all three.

[Tom]

Well, yeah, but.

[Christy]

Yeah, winning the Triple Crown is.

[Tom]

Journalism was who I picked for the Derby, too. Darn it.

[Josh]

I just thought it was nice for Journalism to get a break.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Josh]

These days, you see most of the journalists getting fired.

[Tom]

So Journalism won Preakness and now he's favored for Belmont. Is that.

[Pat Godwin]

Yes.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

He is favored 8 to 5 in the Belmont Stakes, but. Yeah, I forgot that. That doesn't even.

[Christy]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Who cares?

[Christy]

Still cool, though. I love that stuff.

[Tom]

We love horse racing. It's very cool.

[Pat Godwin]

And that's sports. Christie.

[Tom]

What?

[Josh]

Well, give us the teaser. Christy, what do you have coming up?

[Tom]

Coming up, we have Porta Potty in the news. How would you feel about no Internet in the world?

[Christy]

I have. I think it has its pluses and minuses.

[Tom]

Well, we're going to talk about that. A lot of cannabis news, including A very interesting story from our buddy Snoop Dogg who is turning roaches into art. We'll talk about it.

[Josh]

I think he's turning roaches. Roaches into money is what he's doing. If you see this stupid. See this art, it is awful.

[Tom]

You know.

[Josh]

Absolutely not interesting. And I would just as soon have him sign one of his turds as to have one of these frame pieces.

[Tom]

There are certain folks who will enjoy this.

[Josh]

Okay, good luck.

[Tom]

How much artwork do you have in your home? Do you have a lot of artwork, like real art?

[Josh]

Plastic dipped roaches?

[Tom]

Well, no, I mean framed. Do you go to like auctions and buy original pieces of art?

[Josh]

No.

[Christy]

But don't you have one of the biggest Thomas Kincaid collections in the Midwest?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, he loves the light.

[Tom]

Wouldn't that be great to find out that he.

[Christy]

I don't dislike that Thomas Kincaid stuff. Josh, how do you paint light like that? Yeah, it's amazing. That looks like a damn lightning bolt.

[Tom]

Okay. I didn't realize you were an 83 year old grandmother.

[Josh]

I don't own any, but I'm bringing the guy who's the guy that had the, the, the fro and the real quiet. I guess those things go for serious money.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Josh]

Original Bob Ross paintings. Yeah, that's not bad.

[Christy]

It looks like a mountain with trees. I mean that's. I can't do it.

[Tom]

They're very quiet.

[Josh]

Yeah, he probably could do it though.

[Christy]

Well, he, he always claims you could.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Josh]

There's a great movie about. I think it's called Tim's Vermeer.

[Tom]

Oh sure, that is a good movie.

[Josh]

And it's, it's the guy, what's the magician, what's his name? Penn and Teller. It's Teller and he, he. It's the whole story about the, about Vermeer. It's. I mean, I don't know, it's. I can't describe it and make it interesting, but it fascinating. This guy who doesn't paint at all and all of a sudden through this bizarre technique is able to make this beautiful painting. It's a great movie. Right now I want to remind you that our friends from Sylac say hello because they know that years from now, now when it's time for you to retire, it'll sure be nice to have a steady paycheck coming in even though you're not working anymore. That's what annuities are all about. And the experts in annuities, of course, the Silac Insurance Company. Now, you know, lately the stock market's been way up and way down and way down and way down and up again and then down. Very confusing. And you want to counter what they call market volatility. And know that you're going to have a steady check no matter what's going on out there on Wall Street. And with an annuity, you don't have to worry about what's happening out there because they're going to take care of it for you on a steady basis. And it's something interesting about it is that you can't outlive your money. So see what a Silac annuity can do for you. There are some restrictions. See if they apply to you. Learn more about the whole deal by going to silacins.com and there's a really easy way to just get some information. Take your phone and you call £250. You hit that hashtag, whatever you call it, pound sign, pound 250 and just say out loud, lifetime income. That's pound 250 lifetime income. And find out information about having a paycheck that'll keep coming. You'll be able to sleep better tomorrow knowing that many tomorrows down the road you're going to have a steady income. That's what annuities are all about. And the experts, of course, the Silac Insurance Company. Plan on it. Live on it. Coming up, we have interesting news from one of the most beautiful structures in the world, the Mackinac Bridge. We have possibly the worst thing that could ever happen to you if you were sitting on a portable toilet. Yeah, whatever you think it is, this is worse. So I, I'm just delighted. Coming up, also, comedian Dyke Michaels. That's his name. Don't send me hate mail. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show. Check engine ABS or maintenance light on. Take the guesswork out of your warning lights with O'Reilly Variscan. The service is free and provides a report with solutions verified by ASE Certified Master Technicians. And if you need help, we could recommend a shop for you. Ask for O'Reilly Veriscan today. Oh, oh, oh.

[Jeff Oskay]

O'Reilly Auto Parts.

[Christy]

Hey, Bob and Tom show here. We're broadcasting live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Christy Lee, Pat Godwin, Jeff Oskay, Ace Cosby. I'm Josh Arnold. There's Tom.

[Josh]

Tom.

[Christy]

We have a special guest coming up later this morning, comedian Dyke Michaels. D Y K E. Yes, and Jeff knows him, but the rest of us have yet to meet him.

[Tom]

No, we haven't.

[Pat Godwin]

Looking forward to that really funny has a podcast called Harder Brunch where I've been on a few times. He cooks you breakfast. You go over. He's a award winning chef.

[Jeff Oskay]

What?

[Pat Godwin]

And he cooks you breakfast? Breakfast, Yeah. I don't think so.

[Tom]

Well, that's cool though.

[Pat Godwin]

Probably should have requested that.

[Jeff Oskay]

Great idea.

[Josh]

If I win the lottery, if I win the lottery, I'm going to have them build them a full kitchen over there. Oh, really? Yeah. I mean, wouldn't that be cool?

[Christy]

That would be cool.

[Josh]

When they redid this building, I wanted a shower, but none of the suits have ever had to work in radio. And you know, we've all been in a situation where we've been in a radio station for, you know, two days in a row.

[Pat Godwin]

They got a hose on the side of the building. I give myself a shower.

[Tom]

He didn't grow up like us, remember?

[Pat Godwin]

Oh yeah, I forgot. Oh, too good to use a garden hose to shower. Oh, I see how you would you.

[Christy]

Drink a bottled water called hose water and it just tastes like it's fresh from the hose.

[Jeff Oskay]

That's funny. That would work.

[Christy]

No, you didn't love hose water.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, the problem is a lot of animals go up in hoses and like poop.

[Jeff Oskay]

They come out.

[Christy]

I mean, you don't drink the fur, you don't turn it on and drink immediately.

[Jeff Oskay]

Getting a mouse. If you drink immediately.

[Christy]

You don't want a black widow.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, I didn't even think about that. You gotta let it run.

[Christy]

Also, it's usually hot.

[Jeff Oskay]

Three night crawlers.

[Josh]

Right off the bat, the hose water here, you can make nails out of it, a little bit of iron in it.

[Pat Godwin]

Now, one of my co workers drank out of a hose and got, I believe, dysentery and had to go to the er. And they're like, have you drank it out of a hose lately? And he goes, yeah. And they go, don't do that. It's very dangerous.

[Tom]

They survive. Kids these days. How did we get to be adults?

[Josh]

We didn't all make it. I can give you a short list.

[Pat Godwin]

That's all we were allowed. My mom would sit you outside, lock the door up, thirsty, there's the hoe.

[Tom]

Come back when it's dinner time.

[Pat Godwin]

Exactly.

[Christy]

And just guzzle that mow the grass.

[Jeff Oskay]

And just guzzle on.

[Josh]

I just think a lot of the bottled water is a scam.

[Tom]

Oh, of course it is.

[Josh]

I mean, some of these companies, you know that they say it's imported from Tahiti.

[Tom]

It's tapwa.

[Josh]

Yeah. There's some guy with a hose or In Greenfield.

[Christy]

Yeah. Was there any truth to the legend that Evian spelled backwards as naive, and they did that on purpose?

[Jeff Oskay]

Because, boy, that would be funny, wouldn't it?

[Tom]

That would be funny.

[Josh]

I remember the first one we came up with was Hot dog water.

[Christy]

Right.

[Josh]

That always is so gross.

[Pat Godwin]

That's so gross every time. I just made the hot dogs the other day, and I couldn't get that bit out of my head as I was saying.

[Tom]

You boiled hot dogs.

[Jeff Oskay]

That's the only way to do it.

[Pat Godwin]

I did.

[Josh]

I still do. That's the best.

[Tom]

Do you guys still boil your hot dog?

[Josh]

Absolutely.

[Christy]

I don't, but I was doing a.

[Pat Godwin]

Chili dog, so I boil for chili dogs. If I just. Doing a hot dog without chili, I grow them.

[Josh]

Gotcha. Okay. Well, now, where were we? I've kind of lost my place here. Sorry. We're getting. Oh, we finished off our sports.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, yeah.

[Josh]

Okay. A great.

[Tom]

We have any names for Pat's album or special?

[Josh]

Yeah, hang on a second. Give me. Once again, Pat. Give me the background while I look these up.

[Jeff Oskay]

Well, it's a dry bar special. It's squeaky clean, and I do a lot of the songs from the new album, Hotel Pool, but it's already. My album's called Hotel Pool, so I can't call it that. I close with Steal my Identity. And every. The whole audience doing the Nanas, which was a great, great standing ovation ending. They stand for everybody. But it was fantastic. It was great.

[Tom]

Do they tell them to stand for everybody?

[Jeff Oskay]

No, but they just do. It's like the most polite crowd in the world.

[Josh]

In the world.

[Jeff Oskay]

They're really highly educated. They come in, they're polite.

[Tom]

In Utah.

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

Provo was wonderful.

[Pat Godwin]

What about Pat Godwin? All dried up.

[Jeff Oskay]

All dried up.

[Pat Godwin]

It's a dry bar.

[Josh]

Sure.

[Jeff Oskay]

Dry bar, all dried up. That'd be awesome.

[Josh]

That implies you're completely out of material. Well, I am.

[Christy]

What about Pat Godwin? Gay sex.

[Jeff Oskay]

Let me think about. Let me run that by them.

[Christy]

Certainly.

[Jeff Oskay]

Run it by the Mormons. Coffee, Cigarettes. Coffee and alcohol.

[Josh]

Me and my family.

[Jeff Oskay]

And one wife.

[Josh]

No, no, no. Make it even better. Me and my three husbands. How about that?

[Jeff Oskay]

I. I like that.

[Josh]

How about. Here we go.

[Jeff Oskay]

You got people that have written in.

[Josh]

Yeah. Well, no, I can't. No, no, I'm sorry. They're too boring to even pass along. Oh, boy. Nope. I can't. I hate all these.

[Jeff Oskay]

You can still say grown up. What?

[Josh]

Grown up. Well, okay, here. He's saying he's handing you some more. Being a grown up ain't easy. Pat Godwin, Patty G rated.

[Tom]

Oh, I like that.

[Jeff Oskay]

That's not bad.

[Pat Godwin]

That's good.

[Tom]

Patty G rated. I. That is. That is catchy. I like it.

[Jeff Oskay]

Satirized for your protection.

[Josh]

Wow. I like that a lot. I really like that. That's great.

[Christy]

I like it. But no.

[Jeff Oskay]

It'S almost too good. It has to have been done before.

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

Sound like it's been written. That's been done before.

[Josh]

Yeah. One time we did a contest on the show. It was to get a slogan for a local business, and we went. Remember this thing? We did it for a month. We finally picked a winner, and it turned out someone had stolen it from a David Letterman Top 10 Listen.

[Christy]

Huh?

[Josh]

So, yeah, you got to be careful. But yeah, Patty. Patty G rated. No one's gonna have done that.

[Jeff Oskay]

Patty G rated is actually pretty good.

[Tom]

He's pretty good.

[Christy]

Do you refer to yourself as Patty G at all in the.

[Jeff Oskay]

I don't do. No, not so it doesn't.

[Christy]

You have to know that we call you that or, you know, Pat Godwin.

[Jeff Oskay]

Patty G. I think people get that.

[Josh]

I hate to agree with Josh. Yeah. Do you? Because you don't. You don't open up with that great I'm Patty G song.

[Jeff Oskay]

No, because it's a gangster folk in. This guy got. It's got words in there that I can't use.

[Josh]

Okay. All right. Why don't you play one of the song. In fact, play the. Play your closer.

[Jeff Oskay]

Okay. You're gonna have to give me a little.

[Josh]

Okay. What are you chewing gum? What's going on over there?

[Jeff Oskay]

I always chew on a pick.

[Tom]

It's my chewing on a pick.

[Josh]

Okay, vamp for me.

[Tom]

Vamp for you.

[Christy]

How about that could be your title. Pat Godwin, sucking pick.

[Jeff Oskay]

I don't.

[Josh]

This guy. This guy goes. He like. He liked the one I said, six strings, no waiting. Waiting.

[Jeff Oskay]

It doesn't make any sense if you're.

[Tom]

Not a guitar player.

[Josh]

Well, it's a six string guitar.

[Jeff Oskay]

And what's the no waiting part?

[Josh]

It's like, you know, six lines, no waiting kind of.

[Jeff Oskay]

Six lines, no waiting.

[Josh]

Never.

[Jeff Oskay]

Never even heard of that.

[Josh]

Okay, fine.

[Tom]

Players all.

[Jeff Oskay]

I pissed him off now.

[Josh]

Maybe call it. I'm thinking of drinking again.

[Jeff Oskay]

I'm thinking of drinking again.

[Josh]

Quitting is for quitters.

[Tom]

Oh, look, it's John Denma. You can call it that.

[Jeff Oskay]

People tell me hackers are listening to all of us on our mobile phones. Buy online, they steal your info and get in your accounts at the savings and loan. My credit's bad. I can't Get a mortgage can't even finance a late model car I wouldn't mind someone taking my knee Give me a brand new start Feel free to steal my identity Steal my identity how dare ya. Na na na na na na na na Steal my identity My mom maiden name's qwerty 1, 2, 3, 4 is my passcode My pet's name is Fido I was born in Philly oh, look at all the stuff I owe I had three surgeries with insurance Two on the back or one for the heart they garnished my wages, couldn't pay my deductible Take my name, give me a brand new start and steal my identity My Social Security number is 209-52-6413 write it down Na na na na na na na na Steal my identity.

[Josh]

Let.

[Jeff Oskay]

Me tell you a little bit about myself. My FICO score is 303. I'm a single dad paying child support one paycheck away from bankruptcy. So please steal my identity Steal my identity I beg you Na na na na na na na na no, I R A no A new earnings, nothing. Nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah the IRS is auditing me. Don't answer the phone. As a collection agency. Out now, baby. Steal my identity thank you. Please sit down. Please sit down.

[Josh]

Very good. Patty G's new comedy special might be called Steal My Identity. It's a bunch of clean songs, Patty G rated. Yeah, I can see Josh's point. That is a great title.

[Tom]

Maybe for the your next album. Well, that couldn't be that because next.

[Jeff Oskay]

Was gonna be dirty.

[Tom]

Is it gonna be dirty?

[Jeff Oskay]

No.

[Tom]

Patty G, X rated Alive.

[Josh]

Yeah, I don't know. Yeah, I like. Patty G rated is really good. But I guess your point is that it's, you know, they don't know your Patty G. Oh, they're gonna find out.

[Jeff Oskay]

Maybe.

[Josh]

Okay, okay, well, we'll work on it. Thank you very much. We're gonna go right now. We're gonna switch gears. If you're just joining us, we are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. That is Christy Lee over there and she is at the SILAC Insurance news desk. What's happening?

[Tom]

Well, a new survey out there reveals nearly half of young people would prefer a world without the Internet. According to the poll of 16 to 21 year olds, 70% reported feeling worse about themselves after spending time on social media and they felt that time they spent online was detrimental to their mental health. Just under 50% said they would rather be young in a world without the Internet. Altogether interesting. They would support a digital curfew that would restrict their access to certain apps and sites past 10pm A quarter of respondents said they spend four or more hours a day on social media. Over 40% admitted to lying to their parents and guardians about what they do online. 40% said they lied about their age online, which is even scarier in a way.

[Christy]

Does that just include, hey, you have to be over 18.

[Tom]

Oh, so they can get on sites. Yeah, probably. 40% say they have a decoy or burner account.

[Christy]

Wow.

[Tom]

Why would they have that?

[Pat Godwin]

They have one that their parents can see and then one their friends can see.

[Josh]

Wow.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, my kids all have burner accounts, but I found them all.

[Josh]

How'd you find them?

[Pat Godwin]

They came up as a recommendation to me.

[Christy]

Hilarious.

[Pat Godwin]

Like I know that kid.

[Christy]

The algorithm snitched on him.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

I'm like, hey, who's this? Oh, that's my other account. I was like, oh, why do you have to? Well, some of my friends, I want to see some stuff, but other people I don't want to see.

[Josh]

Is there a program called Snitch.

[Christy]

Boy? It's tough. That's tough.

[Pat Godwin]

I'm so glad I grew up without that.

[Christy]

Yeah, me too.

[Pat Godwin]

I would be ruined.

[Tom]

I would too.

[Pat Godwin]

Like this.

[Tom]

My self esteem, bad as it is.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Josh]

Plus bullying has now reached all new levels.

[Christy]

Sophistication 24 7.

[Tom]

Now, 30% of those surveyed said they pretend to be a whole different person completely online.

[Josh]

Well, most of us did that in person anyway. When you go to a bar, you know, Friday night at a bar. Christie, you know what I'm talking about. Sure.

[Tom]

Back in the day.

[Christy]

Oh yeah.

[Josh]

It's not going to go back.

[Christy]

Dr. Josh Wells. Good. Sure had nice Friday and Saturday nights.

[Josh]

But I mean those of a certain age remember the good old days when you had to have dial up to do proper bullying. Now there's just doesn't really require a lot more effort. Wow.

[Tom]

So that's interesting though.

[Christy]

They all want. Yeah.

[Tom]

That they want it, but then they're hooked. Still on it.

[Christy]

Yeah. I mean, what are you gonna do?

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Josh]

Does that differ though from saying I want to be in this. Living in the 60s again or whatever?

[Christy]

Yes.

[Josh]

Going back in time.

[Christy]

They want their life nowadays they just don't want that aspect.

[Josh]

So they don't want the, the ability to.

[Christy]

Yeah.

[Josh]

They still find out what time movies start without buying a newspaper, Right?

[Christy]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Tom]

Oh, I remember those days.

[Christy]

I loved it. I used to obsess over just looking at the movies in the newspaper.

[Tom]

Yeah. And they would have pictures of all the movies that were coming out every.

[Josh]

Day we would get here and we would dial the U. S. Naval observatory to get the exact time.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Josh]

To the second. So that we could hit all the network posts.

[Christy]

Yeah, see, the kids don't want that. They want to be able to still just look at their phone and see the time. Right? Yeah, yeah.

[Tom]

They just don't want social media. I think what they don't want is social media.

[Christy]

Right.

[Josh]

I just wanted to meet the lady going at the tone the time will be, remember her? I mean, unbelievably hot.

[Tom]

She was a computer, Tom.

[Josh]

No, she wasn't. You should see the drawings I have. Of course. Hello, Gladys. Topless again.

[Christy]

Do these drawings look like a computer to you?

[Tom]

I watched him a Jetsons episode last night and, and there was a. They were going to the moon. They was taking the cub scouts to the moon. I don't know if you remember this. And George, they were on the moon shuttle and the lady. This is, you know, luna. And the lounge will be open as soon as we are in orbit or whatever. And then this guy goes. This has been a transcribed message.

[Josh]

I mean it's absolutely amazing how dead on the Jetsons is so many things.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Josh]

They, that they have in that, that we really do have.

[Tom]

It's pretty frightening in a way.

[Josh]

I just want to get those gravity defying cars where you can pause and hover and nothing's moving. There's. The air is not blowing everywhere. Yeah. Now coming up, comedian Dyke Michaels will be joining us. That's his name. Calm down. We will report for duty. I'll tell you right now. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios reporting for duty and this is the Bob and Tom Show. For a complete copy of the Bob and Tom show contest rules go to bobandtom.com contest rules. Or just scroll down to the bottom of the page and see contest rules. This is the Bob and Tom show.

[Tom]

This is a mini meditation guided by bombus. Repeat after me. I'm comfy. I'm cozy. Cozy. I have zero blisters on my toes.

[Josh]

Blisters.

[Tom]

And that's because I wear bombus. The softest socks, underwear and T shirts that give back. One purchased equals one donated. Now go to bombus.com listen and use code. Listen for 20% off your first purchase. That's B O M b-s.com and use code. Listen at checkout.

[Josh]

Coming up.

[Christy]

Hey, it's the Bob and Tom show. Live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Chris Delays at the Silac Insurance Company news desk.

[Tom]

Hello.

[Christy]

Pat Godwin's at the guitar and organ desk.

[Josh]

Hello.

[Christy]

Jeff Oskay's at the beard and glasses desk.

[Pat Godwin]

That's right.

[Christy]

Ace Cosby's at the Raiders hat desk. Hey, I'm Josh Arnold at the Cuts Like a Slices Like a ninja Cuts Like a razor blade desk.

[Josh]

Wait a minute, Hang on.

[Christy]

Little vanilla eyes for that ass.

[Josh]

That's what that is. Say it again.

[Christy]

I don't know why that popped into my head.

[Dyke Michaels]

What is it?

[Christy]

Slice like a ninja, cut like a razor blade. You like Vanilla Ice?

[Josh]

Kind of redundant, isn't it? It's. It's rare.

[Christy]

I think it's poetry. And there's Tom, who wouldn't know true poetry if Vanilla Ice came in and probably didn't sat on his face. Movie Cool as Ice. I have the movie novelization of that.

[Josh]

Isn't Vanilla Ice a carpenter?

[Christy]

Yeah, yeah. He was a skilled.

[Josh]

Like. Like his thing. He's got a. Didn't he have a reality show?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, it's like home renovation.

[Christy]

Like Robert Van Winkle or something.

[Josh]

Yeah. What was his.

[Pat Godwin]

He actually does really good work, baby. Like the stuff I've seen.

[Christy]

Yeah, yeah. He's like legit good at it.

[Josh]

Didn't he claim that Ice Ice Baby wasn't stolen from somebody?

[Christy]

Claimed that he. They did not use under pressure. And that's an insane claim.

[Josh]

It is. Note for note. Okay, all right. Okay. I'm not much. I don't know much about the guy, so.

[Tom]

You don't.

[Josh]

Thank you for the question.

[Christy]

Well, you should know, though, that he slices like a ninja and cuts like a razor blade.

[Josh]

The distinction being what?

[Christy]

Slicing like a ninja is more exact but more damaging. Cutting like a razor blade.

[Josh]

So which does he do?

[Christy]

Is also surgical but small. Be somewhat redundant or detailed.

[Josh]

Okay, good to know.

[Christy]

I explained it to you.

[Josh]

Christy Lee is.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Josh]

Prophet. Is something much more reasonable over there in the world of news at the Silac Insurance news desk. What's happening?

[Tom]

A new study has found that video game use in elementary school boys is linked to both positive and negative social behaviors, depending on the game and the player's age. Here are some of the.

[Josh]

I think you can probably guess the negative, but go ahead. What do you got?

[Tom]

Positive. Let's go with the positive.

[Christy]

Okay.

[Tom]

Some gaming, problem solving. Foster connection and teamwork despite competitive elements because you're talking to your buddies.

[Christy]

Oh, that's right. It's all very connected now, right?

[Tom]

Boys who played Clash of Clans and Fortnite, both collaborative games, showed stronger peer relationships compared to non gamers, I think it's just because they're interacting with their peers all the time.

[Christy]

They're learning to cuss way younger. Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

That's Call of Duty.

[Christy]

Oh, okay.

[Jeff Oskay]

You ought to hear what I hear.

[Josh]

Coming from my son's bedroom.

[Tom]

Are you serious?

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, my gosh. And loud. Like at 10 o' clock at night. I go, jimmy, we have neighbors.

[Tom]

Or is it him?

[Jeff Oskay]

It's the interaction with his friends.

[Christy]

It's filthy.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

I said, Jim, it's 10:00 clock at night.

[Christy]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

This poor woman next door.

[Tom]

Why isn't he a bed? He's a.

[Christy]

Well, it's summer.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Oh, okay.

[Josh]

Hey, but this is interesting, so. Because there's a commonality.

[Tom]

Right.

[Josh]

That's important and yes. Remember when those are always referred to as Madonna headsets?

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

Janet Jackson or the Garth Brooks.

[Tom]

The Janet Jackson headset.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Madonna. Yeah. Yeah. Negative findings. Players of Mortal Kombat, known for violent combat, showed higher levels of aggression, impulsiveness and antisocial behavior.

[Christy]

Man, I, I. Look, the studies say it. I guess I'm super skeptical about that. Yes. I'd like to know if those kids already displayed that stuff. And there. And that's why Mortal Kombat is attractive to them.

[Tom]

There you go. Gamers overall scored higher in antisocial traits and a desire to dominate.

[Josh]

Huh.

[Tom]

Don't.

[Josh]

Are these shooting games?

[Pat Godwin]

No, Mortal Kombat is just like a karate fighting game type thing.

[Josh]

Is there a video game for young boys that like girls? What do you mean?

[Pat Godwin]

Well, that's the thing, though.

[Josh]

Wrestling and shooting.

[Pat Godwin]

And a lot of girls are gamers now.

[Christy]

So many.

[Pat Godwin]

Like, my daughter plays Fortnite or with four other girls every night and they're on a team together and they go out.

[Tom]

Oh, really?

[Pat Godwin]

They play for hours?

[Christy]

Yes.

[Pat Godwin]

And chat it up.

[Tom]

What is Fortnight? I'm not familiar with it.

[Pat Godwin]

It's basically a shooting game where you have 100 people that are dropped into a city and the last person standing wins.

[Tom]

Oh, okay. Does anybody ever win?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, every, every match there's one winner.

[Tom]

Oh. So it.

[Pat Godwin]

But there will be a million matches going on at once with different groups of people.

[Josh]

But are you shooting?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah. You're shooting. Or you have like a hammer that you can like hit people with? Or a sword.

[Josh]

Is there a gun? Gun. Or is it a.

[Pat Godwin]

They're all. It's like very cartoony, like you're using a controller.

[Josh]

Okay.

[Christy]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Now there's games like Call of Duty where you're an actual army man or a marine and you are in a Team and different people have like, one guy has to go and like set the breach on the door while the other person guards.

[Christy]

And you're actually like in like Syria.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah. And I mean, it's the first time I've ever been called a slur by a five year old. It's a very intense game. It's very intense.

[Tom]

Now, do you have to play these with other people or.

[Dyke Michaels]

No.

[Pat Godwin]

You like, I don't like, if I'm gonna play a video game, I don't get on the headset and talk to people. I'm a grown man.

[Josh]

Well.

[Christy]

And we didn't grow up that way. We grew up. It was a very. It was almost a solitary thing. Unless you. Well, you had your buddies with you in the room, right?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, exactly. But no, now they're. And the other thing is kids will just watch their friends play and talk. Like. Yeah, they're like. I'm like, oh, what game are you playing? Oh, I'm not playing. I'm just observing. I'm like. You're doing what? Oh, I'm watching my friends play this game.

[Tom]

I was like, in the same room or are they.

[Pat Godwin]

No, like online? They're watching it on the tv. Watching, like watching a movie? Yeah.

[Christy]

I watched my. I bought the game Saw.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Christy]

Based on the movie and I, I had no interest in playing it. But I go, my younger. My youngest brother Joe loves games. I go, please play Saw so I can watch it. And I just watched him play it.

[Pat Godwin]

There are gamers who make millions of dollars just playing online while people watch the.

[Josh]

Them.

[Christy]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Really?

[Pat Godwin]

They're that good at a game and.

[Christy]

A lot of them are super hot girls.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, yeah, a few of them are, yeah. Hot girls.

[Christy]

Twitch is the place, right?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Tom]

I am really old.

[Pat Godwin]

I mean, comedian Henry Phillips has a Twitch account where he cooks on it.

[Tom]

Oh yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

And thousand tens of thousands of people watch him cook every week.

[Christy]

Makes good money.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Yeah, he does really well on Twitch.

[Christy]

It's awesome.

[Pat Godwin]

It's very weird. Weird like. But.

[Josh]

Wouldn'T you prefer watching a hot porno and starting to twitch the old fashioned way?

[Christy]

Yes, I. I guess in that aspect I am.

[Josh]

Maybe, maybe I can invent a game called the Twitch and shoot off.

[Christy]

That's a first person shooter.

[Josh]

Yeah. No digital anything. Some clean X and. Never mind. I'm sorry. Yeah.

[Tom]

Is there a porn aspect to this gaming?

[Christy]

A little bit. There's a niche. Like you can follow porn stars who game on Twitch.

[Tom]

Okay.

[Christy]

So in a way.

[Pat Godwin]

And they'll be wearing like a bikini top or you Know, but I don't.

[Christy]

Think they want to be. They don't want you going, hey, show us your feet, or whatever they want you to. They want to talk about, like, if.

[Pat Godwin]

A lady was to have a nip slip, so to speak, they would be kicked off of Twitch.

[Josh]

Okay, so they're one called twatch.

[Christy]

Yeah, similar, but they don't have.

[Josh]

That's the name of a watch, isn't it?

[Tom]

Yeah, that's Watch in the games.

[Pat Godwin]

Not like. Well, they probably do. My kids probably just don't play those ones around me. I have no idea.

[Christy]

I would think they'll just be distracting to the true gamer. They're just. They want to play.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Christy]

They don't want to see digital boobs.

[Josh]

But like in Fortnite, we're raising a generation of prudes that are so boring.

[Christy]

We are, in a way raising a generation of men who are way less interested in sex than we were growing up.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Josh]

Studies have shown that leaves more for us. We invented Viagra, you punk.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, maybe they wait till adulthood now, which isn't a bad thing.

[Tom]

That isn't a bad thing.

[Pat Godwin]

But like in Fortnite, you can dress your character however you want. Like, my daughter is dressed as Harley Quinn.

[Tom]

Okay.

[Pat Godwin]

And like a short skirt. Yeah.

[Josh]

Let me ask you, and I'm not trying to be negative at all when I ask you this. I'm not trying to be a jerk. Is there a game designed for young gay men or young gay women? Or is there one that they have drifted toward and as.

[Pat Godwin]

I have no idea.

[Christy]

Yeah, I don't know either.

[Pat Godwin]

Fortnight seems to be across the board. Boys, girls, men, women, gay, Strange.

[Christy]

Ages.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, all ages.

[Josh]

But I'm sure the people that make these know exactly who their audience is.

[Tom]

Oh, God. Yeah, that's old school.

[Josh]

I'm just wondering, is there one that, you know, like, fashion directed, you know?

[Christy]

Well, no, no, all of them.

[Pat Godwin]

They can buy clothes for their avatars and. And some of the clothes you can spend $500 on a Gucci hat for your.

[Christy]

Real money? Yeah, real money.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Christy]

I used to give my nieces and nephews Fortnite gift cards so they could just buy these accessories for their. That's all they wanted.

[Josh]

Do you get to name your avatar?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Christy]

Oh, yeah.

[Josh]

So if the kid names his avatar Halston, you know, too Gucci.

[Jeff Oskay]

Little Richard, the late Little Richard, before he passed away, had a video game out there.

[Josh]

Oh, really?

[Jeff Oskay]

What was that call of 2D fruit you may have heard?

[Christy]

Oh, yes.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, I missed that one. Pretty good.

[Josh]

That is very good. Pat, that's a nice clean cap on this.

[Jeff Oskay]

You know, 10 seconds to kind of make sure that it wasn't.

[Josh]

I didn't say anything for 10 minutes. You know what?

[Christy]

It sounded like a 10 second joke.

[Josh]

No, no, I don't agree. That's very, very nice. Thank you very much. We are coming up, coming back, I should say. We'll be joined by comedian Dyke. Michaels will be joining us today. Also we have marijuana news from the old folks. Hey, roll me. Roll me a fatty. Clarence. I'm gonna get high.

[Christy]

Oh boy, he's ready.

[Josh]

We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show. Hey, thanks for listening this morning. Got something to say? Send us an email. Bobandtomobandtom.com I am Michael Rosenbaum. I am Tom Welling.

[Pat Godwin]

Welcome to Talk Bill. Where it's fun to talk about Smallville.

[Christy]

We're going to be talking to sometimes stars. Are you liking the direction Lois is going in?

[Josh]

Yeah, cuz I'm getting more screen time. It's good.

[Pat Godwin]

But mostly it's just me and Tom remembering.

[Josh]

I think we all feel like there.

[Dyke Michaels]

Was a scene missing here.

[Josh]

You got me Tom. Let's revisit it. Let's look at it. See what we remember.

[Pat Godwin]

See what we remember.

[Josh]

I had never been around anything like that before.

[Dyke Michaels]

I mean it was so fun.

[Josh]

Talk ville, Talk Bill.

[Pat Godwin]

I just had a flashback. Follow and listen on your favorite platform.

[Josh]

Let's get into it. Wow.

[Christy]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show.

[Josh]

Today's show really rocky.

[Jeff Oskay]

Well, life is rocky.

[Tom]

Yeah. It's not all positive.

[Christy]

You don't make it easy.

[Jeff Oskay]

So hard some days.

[Christy]

What am I talking about? I'm talking about our show, the Bob and Tom show. Live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios, Christy Lee at the Silac Insurance Company news desk.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Christy]

Pat Godwin across the way.

[Josh]

Jeff.

[Christy]

Oscar joins us.

[Pat Godwin]

Hey, Josh.

[Christy]

As does Ace Cosby. Howdy. I'm Josh Arnold and there's Tom. Tom. Later on we'll be joined by comedian Dyke Michaels.

[Josh]

Just met him.

[Christy]

Oh good.

[Josh]

In the green room.

[Christy]

Affable chap.

[Josh]

Yeah, yeah, apparently.

[Tom]

What thing did you say to him?

[Josh]

Quite the chef. I didn't say. I just said you must be Dyke. And he said yeah, it was a pretty good assumption. There's nobody else in the building. Walk around, there's some strange looking guy. Hey buddy. Who the hell are you?

[Tom]

A strange looking guy.

[Josh]

I mean he's a stranger.

[Tom]

Not a stranger.

[Josh]

He's fairly normal looking. I didn't see any weird two Arms, two legs.

[Tom]

It's not too late, dyke. You can leave. Get out.

[Josh]

Got a letter. We were talking about these video games and another one of these scientific studies alleging that if you play Mortal Kombat you're more aggressive. I guess that was the conclusion.

[Christy]

I don't buy it. There are numerous studies that argue against that.

[Josh]

That Dear Bob and Tom show. When my cousin Earl drinks too many Mountain Dews and somebody touches his deer, his deer jerky, he gets extraordinarily upset. Just like when I play Mortal Kombat and want to go out and kill people. So as you can see, I don't think they're taking this seriously. We have Christy Lee at the. She's over there at the silo.

[Tom]

I find it fascinating the video game world because I know nothing about it and I think it's really your girls don't play.

[Josh]

This is funny.

[Christy]

This comes to us from Gary talking about kids watching others play video games online. I asked my grandson, why do you do that? He said, why do you watch people play football on tv? Yeah, hilarious.

[Jeff Oskay]

I mean that is great comment.

[Christy]

So it's a very similar experience. Isn't that interesting?

[Pat Godwin]

This, this is from Josh in Northern Kentucky. Your comment on games for boys that like girls. There is. It's called the Sims. You can make women nude and do the dirty and more and the Sims is still around.

[Christy]

Yeah. Okay.

[Tom]

Wasn't that one of the first games? I mean it's been around for a long time.

[Josh]

What's next?

[Pat Godwin]

Pong the movie and according to Alan, a little insight to nudity and gaming. Grand Theft Auto 5, which is the one that's currently out as strip bars you can drive to and visit. Keep up the good fight.

[Christy]

I can't believe I've I'm of the age now where the controller is too confusing for me and I never thought I would be that way. I used to be baffled too many buttons when I was 12 and my grand grandpa was like I can't figure this out. Like what are you talking about? And now my nephew looks at me like what?

[Josh]

What?

[Christy]

It's real easy, dude. I'm like, no, I.

[Josh]

Well that's cuz they spend hours upon hours doing it.

[Christy]

I know, but I just never thought I'd be that guy.

[Pat Godwin]

Well there's honestly like 10 or 12 buttons.

[Christy]

So many.

[Tom]

Are you kidding?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, you have a bumper button, you have a trigger button, you have your four on this side, you have your four on the other side.

[Christy]

I can't do it.

[Pat Godwin]

Too many buttons.

[Tom]

Yeah, I'm not coordinated.

[Christy]

Enough.

[Pat Godwin]

And then little joy. Exactly.

[Christy]

Roller.

[Josh]

How many.

[Christy]

Yeah.

[Josh]

Video games that have been made into movies. I know they've got.

[Christy]

Minecraft's the biggest one.

[Jeff Oskay]

What's the Mario Brothers?

[Pat Godwin]

What's the series that's out now on hbo?

[Christy]

Last of Us.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, Last of Us.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

That was a video very popular.

[Tom]

Is that the zombie one?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. My son was playing that the other day. Scared the daylights out of me.

[Christy]

Yeah, some of those games are intense.

[Josh]

Now. It wasn't your son's favorite Five Nights at Freddy's, Pat.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yes, absolutely. And he loved that movie too. It's a pretty well done movie. It was creepy.

[Tom]

What's Five Nights at Freddy's about?

[Jeff Oskay]

A very interesting. It started off as like an underground video game. Wonderful music. I really enjoy.

[Christy]

It's kind of like a killer Chuck E. Cheese.

[Tom]

Oh, okay.

[Jeff Oskay]

They're abandoned. Yeah, Abandoned Chuck E. Cheese dolls that come to life kind of thing.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah. It's really creepy.

[Josh]

It is. What's. What's the most successful video game turned into a movie?

[Christy]

It's got to be either Mario Brothers or Minecraft now.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, probably Minecraft.

[Josh]

Kill.

[Tom]

Didn't you see that? Did you take the girls?

[Josh]

No, they went with. But I was told that even though I've never played the video game, that the movie's actually really good.

[Christy]

The Sonic movies are really successful.

[Josh]

You could go see it without knowing how to play the video game and get a kick out of it.

[Tom]

Gotcha.

[Christy]

I love that first Mortal Kombat movie.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Josh]

So I'm. I've got three movies I've got to see right now. That's one of them.

[Tom]

What's the other two?

[Josh]

I want to see the new Mission Impossible.

[Tom]

Yeah, me too.

[Jeff Oskay]

Supposed to be great.

[Josh]

And what's the other one? That came out last week. I was just so busy. Or two big movies that came out.

[Tom]

I don't know. Did you. Have you been to the movies lately?

[Christy]

No, it's been a little bit. The weather's been so nice.

[Tom]

Yeah, me too.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Tom]

Just.

[Josh]

Just been. All. Been all. Been all backed up. Now it's time to check in with Christy Lee at the SILAC Insurance news desk. What have you got?

[Tom]

Probably not a surprise to many of you, but cannabis, the use of it on the rise, not among teenagers, but among older adults. That's right.

[Josh]

You know why?

[Tom]

Because we've been doing it since we were teenagers.

[Josh]

No, it's. That's got to be one reason my knee hurts.

[Tom]

Well, there's that.

[Josh]

A little bit of reefer.

[Tom]

New research from NYU Shows marijuana use among seniors has reached record levels, a study found. Notable.

[Josh]

By the way, I'd like to object to being called seniors. I hate, I hate that senior citizen thing. Sounds like you're in some militia where you're. All right, take your Metamucil, boys and grab your weapons. We're senior citizens. We're heading out today.

[Tom]

What do you prefer?

[Josh]

Well, seniors. I'm still a juniors for in my mind. Yeah, there you go. Older people. How about calling them old people?

[Jeff Oskay]

One of the elders, the study found.

[Josh]

Notable. That sounds like we're part of a conspiracy. I like that. If I can be in charge.

[Tom]

Notable increases in cannabis use among older adults who are college educated, married, female or have higher incomes. They also saw a rise in use among seniors with chronic health conditions, as Tom mentioned, including heart disease, diabetes and cancer. Experts say the trend reflects changing attitudes but also raises new concerns. They're urging healthcare providers to talk with older patients about how aging bodies may respond differently to cannabis. And of course, the cannabis of today, not the cannabis of. Yesteryears.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yesteryears were scary to me. I couldn't imagine doing it today.

[Josh]

Yeah, I just read an article about that and they say on average it's 20 to 30 times more.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, I could.

[Josh]

What is it called? THC content.

[Christy]

Yeah, man. Knocks you on your ass.

[Josh]

Yeah. So if you, if you haven't done it for 30 years and decide for old time's sake and the guy's bogarting it, let him. You're gonna be.

[Tom]

Or if they give you a gummy, do only half.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, a little hit. You can always do more. You can't take out what you've already done.

[Tom]

That's right.

[Pat Godwin]

So.

[Josh]

It'S my understanding with the elderly doing more of it now, the munchies are kicking in at the cafeteria at 2 o' clock in the afternoon.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh boy.

[Josh]

It's not a late lunch now.

[Christy]

Well, open up.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, they have like Margaritaville retirement home for like the drinkers or whatever. I wonder if Snoop or Willie will have his own retirement home where you can blaze up up for the new cannabis people.

[Tom]

That's a great idea. Should run with that Oscar.

[Pat Godwin]

I shouldn't have said that on national radio.

[Jeff Oskay]

You know, it's funny about older people. I remember calling Tom when I was in the cruise ship because I looked out at the sea of white haired people, older folks, and I was like a little intimidated with my act. Would it go over? Would they even get it? And Tom goes, those people are only 10, 15, 20 years older than you are. They Are have been to Woodstock. They're going to get all your references. And he was absolutely right. Sometimes in your head you forget, you know, if you're our age, if you.

[Tom]

Are the white haired guy.

[Jeff Oskay]

Exactly.

[Josh]

If you were at Woodstock, you're at least 70. You're 75.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Josh]

That. Yeah. You'd have to be. What was that, 69. Yeah. So, yeah. You were probably born either 1950 or earlier. Yeah. So they're gonna, they're gonna get your reference.

[Jeff Oskay]

You're gonna get it.

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah.

[Josh]

They're gonna get your who jokes.

[Jeff Oskay]

My hooch.

[Josh]

Your. You, you're and your YouTube, your YouTube jokes. Thank you very much. Coming up, speaking of Snoop, we have Snoop in the news.

[Tom]

Yeah, we do.

[Josh]

Coming up, dykes and smooths. Wait a minute.

[Tom]

Snoops.

[Christy]

Sorry, I'm gonna say you saying dykes made you so nervous that you messed up the rest of your sentence. By the way, that's the gentleman's name.

[Josh]

His name is Dyke Michaels. And coming up up, Dyke and Snoop.

[Tom]

There you go.

[Josh]

Wow, that boy. Dyke and stoop. I sounds like a. Never mind. You pick your, you pick your double bill.

[Jeff Oskay]

All right, wrap it up.

[Christy]

Surely you got something to say.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Christy]

Pay the bills.

[Josh]

What have you got coming up, Christy?

[Tom]

I have what?

[Jeff Oskay]

I have a car payment coming.

[Tom]

I have a mortgage.

[Christy]

I'm gonna predict. We have a meeting.

[Jeff Oskay]

I have an email coming.

[Josh]

Right now. I want to remind you about our friends. It's simply safe. Simply safe. It's the, it's this, it's the. You can install it yourself. What more can I say? The security system, that is so simple also. It's simple in its execution. It's easy to use. You're not going to have alarms going off all the time. You don't know how to turn it off. You don't know how to turn it on. It's very confusing. Nope. Simplisafe is the number one customer service winner in America when it comes to security systems. Also ranked number one by the way, by Newsweek and USA Today. Four million Americans are now using Simplisafe systems. So get the details by going to simplisavetom.com and by the way, today there's a cool thing going on. You can claim 50% off a new system if you buy into a professional monitoring plan. You can also get your first month for free. Monitoring plans started about a buck a day. There's also a 60 day money back guarantee from Simplisafe. They have something called active guard outdoor protection. Someone is going to be watching your house for you with Special AI powered cameras and live monitoring agents. Get all the details. See what I'm talking about? See how this works and how they can help you. You feel a lot more comfortable when you're in your house or when you're even not in it and maybe out on the job. It's called SimpliSafe, like I said, because it is. The idea is so simple, but it's so properly and well executed. Go to simplisafetom.com for those huge savings today. That's simplisafetom.com there's no safe like simply safe. I'll get it right this time, by the way. Coming up, Dyke and Snoop. That's comedian Dyke Michaels and news about Snoop Dogg. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Christy]

Hey, it's the Bob and Tom show live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Christy Lee at the Silac Insurance Company news desk.

[Tom]

Hello.

[Christy]

Pat Godwin's over there.

[Jeff Oskay]

Hello.

[Christy]

Jeff Oskay across the way. Ace Cosby's here. Josh Arnold and Tom, we're joined by a comedian that we're meeting for the first time.

[Josh]

We are indeed. He is comedian Dyke Michaels. And Dyke, I'm sure that you get a lot of questions about. They probably want to go, are you related to Al Michaels?

[Christy]

Yes, a lot of questions.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Dyke Michaels]

What if I just came in here, it's like, my name's Dwight.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Dyke Michaels]

Is it that?

[Josh]

No. Oh, no, it's D Y K E Dyke.

[Dyke Michaels]

It is.

[Josh]

Is that an actual on the birth certificate kind of thing?

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah, yeah. It's my, it's my given name. I get a lot of questions about it. You know, like people always, like, because I'm a stand up comedian, people ask, is that a stage name? To which I always say, why the hell would that be my stage name? I did all of junior high and it was terrible.

[Tom]

I can't imagine.

[Josh]

Oh, boy.

[Dyke Michaels]

Now I'm an adult. I like to have fun with it. You know, sometimes I'm like at a grocery store and there's like a friend I haven't seen since high school. And they'll be like, hey, Dyke. And I just pretend that I don't hear them.

[Josh]

Well. And you have a rather masculine looking look. You have a big thick beard and that'd be. All right.

[Jeff Oskay]

Where are you going?

[Tom]

All right.

[Josh]

I mean, like how much Nike Air can one get?

[Tom]

Oh, my God.

[Josh]

Just.

[Christy]

Okay, well, this is going about how I thought.

[Jeff Oskay]

I didn't know it would be this quick. Yeah, we got right into it.

[Josh]

What's your back? Tell me about your background. What are you. What's happening in your life? Do you have parents?

[Tom]

Well, no. He was dropped here by a spaceship.

[Dyke Michaels]

Immaculate conception. Yeah. I was. I was raised by my World War II era grandparents. So I'm a. I'm a millennial, but I was raised boomer. Does that make sense?

[Josh]

Makes sense.

[Dyke Michaels]

Like, I think a lot of people where and they don't know it. I made up a test. I think that, like, when you guys were kids and you were sick, did your parents give you the bowl to throw up in?

[Christy]

Absolutely.

[Dyke Michaels]

Was it also the family popcorn bowl?

[Tom]

Yes.

[Josh]

Yes.

[Jeff Oskay]

Wait a second.

[Dyke Michaels]

You're on to something that's being raised boomer.

[Josh]

Right there.

[Tom]

Still do that.

[Josh]

God, that's so. That is such a great observation. That is. In my case, it was a stainless steel bowl.

[Christy]

Well, so what do they do now?

[Tom]

Yeah, what do you use now? What do you use now?

[Josh]

Pop, you're not going to believe this. I just took my vomiting daughter to the hospital on. What was it, Friday? Wait a minute. Yeah, last Friday. And in. In the. In all the chaos, I just grabbed a big, clear garbage bag.

[Tom]

Really?

[Josh]

Yeah. Well, that was one of those things where all of a sudden we're were out of nowhere, jumping in a car and heading to the hospital.

[Christy]

Yeah. So you grab. Hey, this will work.

[Josh]

Yeah, but I didn't go. I didn't. Wait a second. Where's the popcorn bin?

[Tom]

We still use.

[Christy]

My mom. My mom would give us the big bowl. My dad would give us a pot because he always. You can hold it by the handle.

[Josh]

And there's a certain age you reached, Dyke. You might be approaching that where you have a really nice car, because there was a time when you don't care if your friend's gonna barf, open up the window, go out the window. Then there's a time when you go, oh, wait a minute. Before we get in the car, I got to get some kind of a bucket, some kind of something to hold the vomit.

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah, it should have been, I think, trash bags.

[Josh]

Right.

[Dyke Michaels]

We should just do it in the trash. I think you had the right.

[Josh]

No, no, it was. It was a matter of just in the car. We didn't have time to. Trash bags are better to think it through.

[Christy]

You tie it up and you throw it away.

[Tom]

Right.

[Christy]

You don't have to wash the popcorn bowls as you suggested.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, we had. At our house dyke. We had the poop knife.

[Tom]

What?

[Dyke Michaels]

Oh, I know what that is.

[Pat Godwin]

If you had too big of a turd What? I've talked about this before.

[Josh]

I put it out of my mind.

[Christy]

So you guys had a. It happened often enough to where you had a knife dedicated for this?

[Pat Godwin]

Well, it happened once with me. My dad used one of the knives and then put it back into circulation, and so I couldn't ever use a knife in my house for, like, five or six years.

[Christy]

Buttering toast with your fingers?

[Pat Godwin]

Yes.

[Jeff Oskay]

Knife roulette. You don't know what knife you're gonna get.

[Christy]

Oh, yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

That's horrible.

[Josh]

And. And you can't get the poop out of it no matter what you do. You can put boiling water.

[Christy]

I bet it does.

[Josh]

If you guys had my level of spirituality.

[Tom]

Or paranoia, you got to burn.

[Dyke Michaels]

The whole house down at that point.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, exactly.

[Josh]

Now, so. So were you on a septic?

[Christy]

Yeah.

[Josh]

So you had to make sure that you didn't clog it up. So.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, it just wouldn't go down.

[Christy]

Right. You needed it out of the bowl.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Christy]

Right.

[Josh]

Ah, wow.

[Christy]

Yeah.

[Josh]

And were you responsible for that?

[Pat Godwin]

I was. I was. And I was like, hey, I can't. It won't go down. And my dad's like, here. And just went and grabbed one of the butter knives and sliced it up.

[Christy]

This happened with my roommate one time, and I heard him in the bathroom going, I'll clean this up. He goes, please just. He goes, go down, you piece of s. And then he started laughing because he realized, literally.

[Josh]

Wow, man. So the popcorn bowl, huh?

[Tom]

Yep.

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah, it was weird growing up because I'm a millennial, but I was raised by these really old people, so I got an old school upbringing. My grandma was a scientist, and she was convinced that the most accurate way to take my temperature growing up was with a rectal thermometer.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, yeah.

[Dyke Michaels]

For just way too long.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Dyke Michaels]

I don't tell you how old I was when she stopped doing it, but I had a driver's license.

[Tom]

Oh, really?

[Dyke Michaels]

Oh, yeah. Yeah.

[Josh]

Oh, boy.

[Dyke Michaels]

I remember, like, the first time I got sick in school, and they sent me down the nurse's office, and they're like, we got to take your temperature. I was like, okay.

[Josh]

Taking your pants off in front of Mrs. Grundy.

[Dyke Michaels]

They were like, no, no, no. It goes in your mouth. I said, the hell it does.

[Josh]

And now it's just that.

[Tom]

Shoot that thing at your head.

[Josh]

I don't trust that.

[Pat Godwin]

I'm with you.

[Tom]

You don't trust it?

[Pat Godwin]

I don't trust it.

[Josh]

No.

[Jeff Oskay]

Once you've watched no country for Old Men, you can't do it like that.

[Josh]

Good point. Bat. I'm with you. So without getting into the reason that you were raised by your grandparents. Yeah. What is their background? You say one's a scientist?

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah, my grandpa was. He was a soldier in World War II and then he was a chemist. My grandma was from France and they met during World War II and he brought her back over and they, they raised me. I spent about half the time with my mom, half the time my grandparents. But a substantial amount of time who.

[Josh]

Picked the name Dyke.

[Dyke Michaels]

Okay, so Dyke was my legal last name. My name was Michael Dyke. And then a few years ago, I thought I was going to get married to a high school English teacher and I didn't think she wanted to be Mrs. Dyke.

[Pat Godwin]

Okay.

[Dyke Michaels]

So I, I talked to my family. Yeah, I talked to my family about changing my name and I was going to change it to something else. And they were very upset that I was getting rid of the family name, so I just swapped it, but I had it legally changed to Dyke.

[Josh]

That's really. That's a great move.

[Dyke Michaels]

Relationship didn't work out though, so.

[Josh]

Oh, well, it's probably for the benefit of Mrs. Dyke. Yeah, for the benefit of Mrs. Dyke, there will be a name change.

[Tom]

Do you speak French?

[Dyke Michaels]

No.

[Josh]

Oh, okay. We're gonna find out more about Mr. Dyke. I mean, Mike Dyke. Now. I'm doing it. See what you've done? I'm still obsessing about the popcorn bowl.

[Tom]

That is just so true.

[Josh]

That's an incredible observation. It's so accurate.

[Tom]

Every time they come home too, they'll go, oh, thanks. That's the bowl we used to vomit in. But, you know, wow, it's clean now.

[Josh]

Okay, let's see. Now we. We're gonna take a. No, we're not. We're gonna talk to Christy Lee. She's at the Silac Insurance news desk. Christy, what else is happening?

[Tom]

Snoop Dogg commissioned an artist to turn his half smoked blunt roaches into art. According to tmz, the rapper is collaborating with artist Erica Kovitz on a project titled Rich and Infamous. The joint venture. Ms. Kovitz preserved Snoop's roach tips onto pigment panels infused in cannabis residue to enhance the designs. Each block authenticated with Snoop Dogg's autograph. The pieces will launch at an appointment only studio in Beverly Hills. I don't have a price tag on them. Do we know how much they're selling for?

[Josh]

No, they're awful. It's just like a roach clip or I mean, a. What is it called? A roach.

[Tom]

A roach.

[Josh]

A roach. Glued. Glued to a piece of Paper with, like, a doodle on it, and then it shows Snoop. It looks like he's signing the glass on the frames. It's really lame.

[Tom]

Oh, I want to see it.

[Josh]

I thought. When I first read this, I thought, oh, these must be. He's taking, you know, whatever, hundreds of roaches and making a design of sort of mosaic. Yeah, it's just. Just really, really lame. Gotcha. It's a. It's a money grab.

[Tom]

And is doesn't even have enough money.

[Josh]

Well, I don't know. Maybe it's. It's. It's not interesting in any way, to be blunt. Thank you. Sorry. That was an unintended fun. No, it is really awful. I mean, there might be something interesting done with this thing, but this isn't it. Yeah, this makes the banana tape to a wall look like genius.

[Tom]

Really.

[Josh]

It's. It's incredibly lame. I would expect more from Snoop. He's always usually very clever. But it looks like a very boring money grab. There you go. Look, see, there's a pink piece of paper with three roaches glued on it.

[Tom]

Oh, they look like worms. Look like little caterpillars.

[Josh]

Yeah, it looks like one of those. Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Are you kidding me?

[Tom]

Yuck.

[Josh]

And is. And is he signing on over the glass?

[Tom]

Well, he could be signing over the glass.

[Josh]

Well, that's. That makes it worthless. Well, no, you should sign the thing and then put the glass anyway. Oh, yeah, it's. It's a very boring. So even talking about it. I'm getting bored talking. Let's move on. What else you got?

[Tom]

Okay. Colorado police say a driver who tried to flee a traffic stop drove into a park and collided with a portable toilet. Oh, the toilet was occupied.

[Christy]

Oh, no.

[Josh]

Can you imagine?

[Tom]

A police spokesman.

[Josh]

You're already. Because you're sitting in a portable toilet in a public place. Oh, and it's already, you know, kind of.

[Christy]

Yeah.

[Josh]

You're not anxiety producing.

[Christy]

Right. Right.

[Josh]

You're sitting down and you get hit by a car.

[Tom]

A police spokesperson told KUSA that the motorist was fleeing from police officers when they went off the road and into Benedict Fountain Park.

[Josh]

So he was on the road run.

[Pat Godwin]

At least.

[Christy]

There's a fountain right there.

[Tom]

The driver then slammed into a portable toilet, injuring the person inside. And police are still searching for the suspect. They haven't found the guy.

[Josh]

Geez, man. Where was this?

[Tom]

Where was it?

[Christy]

Colorado, you said?

[Tom]

I don't remember.

[Josh]

What?

[Tom]

Colorado? Yes.

[Josh]

Oh, was it the big city? You know what they. They call the. The Flotsam from Mattis? The Denver Nuggets. They're floating in the. Never mind. Would that be the worst, though?

[Christy]

Yeah, that would be terrible.

[Josh]

You probably have like some kind of open wound and it's now being bathed and.

[Tom]

Oh, God.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Christy]

I'm sure you just. Well, I have pink eye for the next year.

[Josh]

Okay. Take my leg off because of the germs in my body. So the next time you go into a portalette, make sure that it's not. Not possible for someone to drive into it. That's all I can say. And you're welcome. We are hanging out with comedian Dyke Michaels.

[Dyke Michaels]

Hey.

[Josh]

Hey. And are you out there? I know that I've read in this little bio of you that you are an expert chef.

[Dyke Michaels]

Oh, expert maybe.

[Pat Godwin]

I think you're an expert chef.

[Dyke Michaels]

I went to culinary school here and I've been cooking. I thought I was going to be a restaurateur. I used to own a food truck for a couple years and then I decided to switch lanes and do stand up comedy. And then I tried to marry the two and I started a podcast where I cook for the guests. I cook like an elaborate three or four course brunch and then do the interview. So we've had Jeff on as a guest before.

[Christy]

What was your food truck?

[Dyke Michaels]

It was called Beast. It was a hamburger food truck.

[Christy]

Oh, nice.

[Josh]

What makes your burger special?

[Dyke Michaels]

So I was just using locally sourced ground beef and ingredients. Everything was from a local purveyor that was like top quality.

[Josh]

What's the secret to making a great burger?

[Dyke Michaels]

I think a secret to making a great burger is just using good ingredients and cooking on a flat top.

[Tom]

Really?

[Christy]

I also have found the less you flip, the better. I flip once. Yeah. Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

What do you suggest? Like an 8020 blend? I like an 80 flat top.

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Tom]

You don't like it a little higher than that.

[Pat Godwin]

I don't. That's why I'm asking him. He's.

[Tom]

Do you need more fat?

[Christy]

Yes. For the juices and flavor. Yeah. 80 20, I think is great.

[Tom]

It's 90 10.

[Josh]

What about. What about. What about the buns?

[Dyke Michaels]

I was getting a. You know, I probably did this the wrong way because I don't have the food truck anymore, but my thing was using fresh buns. I think in culinary school they told us, they said you don't have to do everything perfect but buy from someone that does. So I would get freshly baked buns from a local bakery and put them on the local beef. Yeah. The condiments were.

[Josh]

Even do a crisp up the buns at all. Do you just keep Them warm?

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah, yeah, you gotta throw them on. There's nothing worse than getting like a cold bun. Yeah, it just came out of the fridge with a hot burger.

[Pat Godwin]

It's weird.

[Josh]

Lettuce, tomato. What do you want? You leave it up to the.

[Dyke Michaels]

We had a few. We had like a, like a classic style one like that. And then we had some signature burgers. I did one with cookie butter and Chinese five spice. And then like, like a Sriracha coleslaw.

[Christy]

Oh, that sound.

[Dyke Michaels]

That was very popular.

[Josh]

He's also really good.

[Christy]

What was the price point for double cheeseburger?

[Dyke Michaels]

Not enough. I'll tell you.

[Josh]

There you go. The food truck is down now. Do you have to get permission to park the food truck? Do you like go to some.

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah, absolutely.

[Josh]

Did you ever get kicked out of a place?

[Dyke Michaels]

Oh no, I think we always checked first. There's not a lot of people that are just like pulling up on a random street and making a bunch of money. Usually it's you're in a partnership with a brewery or you know, somebody that wants you there to serve. Serve food. It's almost like a catering kind of thing.

[Christy]

Do you ever run into a porta.

[Dyke Michaels]

Potty when you tell that story? It's like. That sounds like something would happen to me though.

[Josh]

So how long would you be parked in the same place?

[Dyke Michaels]

It depends. We did like, we did weekly pop ups in our neighborhood. So everyone kind of knew like, oh, Wednesday they'll be there for four hours. And we'd set up little tables and chairs and stuff. So it was like a little outdoor restaurant.

[Tom]

Oh, that's cool.

[Dyke Michaels]

Four or five hours is about normal service.

[Josh]

You need a permit?

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah, yeah. You have to have lots of permits.

[Josh]

Oh yeah. More than one?

[Dyke Michaels]

Oh yeah.

[Christy]

You gotta have plenty of red tape.

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah. Oh yeah.

[Josh]

So you can't like mix two things. Like you can't do haircuts and burgers. Would you, would you go to a place called Haircuts and Burgers?

[Pat Godwin]

If I got the burger first?

[Tom]

Yeah. You wouldn't have hair in your burger? Yeah.

[Josh]

What about, what do you call those? Toe jobs? What are those called?

[Tom]

A pedicure.

[Josh]

Pedicure, yeah. What about, what about pedicures? Pedicures and pizza. Would that be a, you know, toe jump? You know what I'm talking about?

[Christy]

You can have a haircut in hamburger place and call it fur burgers.

[Josh]

That's one of our classics.

[Tom]

That is a classic.

[Josh]

Fur burgers, Turkey patooy. Remember that one? That was certainly a classic. We're hanging out with comedian dyke Michaels. We'll find out more about Mr. Michaels coming up. A couple of other quick things coming up in the news. We have the Mackinac Bridge in the news, one of the most beautiful structures in North America, linking the Upper Peninsula to the Lower Peninsula. We have Mount Aetna in the news.

[Christy]

No, but I'll kiss her.

[Josh]

Did you see the end of the video of that yesterday?

[Dyke Michaels]

No.

[Christy]

I don't even know what Mount Aetna is.

[Tom]

Oh, it's in Sicily.

[Josh]

Are you serious?

[Jeff Oskay]

You don't know what Mount Volcano.

[Christy]

Only from crossword puzzles.

[Josh]

It's the most active volcano in Europe.

[Christy]

Oh, okay. And it's, you know, sometimes I play the role of the audience.

[Josh]

The audience isn't that dumb.

[Christy]

No. Not everybody knows what Aetna is.

[Tom]

Right? Not Everybody knows what Mount Aetna is. I agree with him.

[Josh]

Okay, name three mountains before we break. Go ahead.

[Christy]

Mount McKinley.

[Tom]

Mount Kilimanjaro.

[Christy]

Everest.

[Josh]

You can't say Kilimanjaro. She took it. Go. One more.

[Christy]

Oh, Mount Olympus.

[Josh]

I'll accept that.

[Christy]

Of course you will.

[Josh]

Now you're out of mounts. I was going to say Mountbatten. I this mount. And we got a song coming up from Patty G. And right now, I want to remind you, the Bob and Tom show is sponsored by Better. Better Help is all about, as Jimmy Ursay used to say, kicking the stigma. And it's the importance of your mental health. It's okay to seek counseling into and to talk to somebody. And BetterHelp is an easier way to access therapy. And I just saw some new numbers. More than 35,000 therapists are working in the mental health sphere with BetterHelp. And there are, I think, 10 million clients these days. So find out what I'm talking about by visiting the website betterhelp.com and I recommend going betterhelp.com btshow to save some cash on that first month at 10%, to be precise. Once again, it's Better Help. H e L P betterhelp.com BTShow what is this all about? I guess I should point that out. It's about doing the therapy online. So obviously it's a lot more convenient. You can be wherever you want to be and be having a talk session with a. With a therapist. And these are, of course, licensed therapists, and they have a huge variety of specialties. So they'll match you up with someone who perhaps is going to be able to discuss whatever is what you want to talk about. It's that simple. And you can switch therapists anytime. No additional fees are involved with that. And you'll be the therapist that you choose will be based on a questionnaire that you fill out. So once again, all the details are pointed out in betterhelp.com btshow so, once again, kick the stigma. And it's important to examine yourself. If you've been thinking about it, here's one less hurdle to have to worry about because you can do it at your convenience, by the way. You can do it with the camera on camera, off camera, you can do it via texting. Whatever works for you. That's betterhelp.com BTShow coming up, it's happened again. We have a zebra on the loose. Yikes. Stripes. Tennessee's got him. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show. Hey, thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom show this morning. Get a look at today's show on our YouTube channel. Live comedy.

[Christy]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom show live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Think O'Reilly Auto Parts for all your car care needs. Get the parts and service you need fast from the professional parts people at O'Reilly Auto Parts. Christy Lee's there. Hi, Pat Godwin, Jeff Oskay, Ace Cosby. I'm Josh Arnold. We're joined, Tom, by comedian Dyke Michaels.

[Josh]

He is indeed Dyke Michaels. And I just found myself guilty of doing something. Something. What'd you do? Well, Dyke is also a, he's a chef and he works at a very fine restaurant. He is the former driver, cooker and other things of a food truck. What's the word I'm looking for? Chef mobile. And in any event, I'll put it this way. I was talking to a guy that works at the, the Apple Store.

[Tom]

Yes.

[Josh]

And I, I said to him, you can't tell people what you do, can you? If you're at some event, if you, if he, and he was saying, yeah, if people find out he works at the Apple Store, he's immediately approached by people who want him to fix his iPhone.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Josh]

You know that. But, and I just realized when you, I found out you were a chef immediately. So what's the best way to.

[Dyke Michaels]

Food's different, though. It's not like being a doctor or like, look at my boil or something like that. It's like people are excited. They want to tell you their recipe. This is how I make ribs. And like, you know, look at me. I got into the game because I like food, you know, So I love having those conversations.

[Josh]

Yeah. And you, you have A podcast about food and about cooking.

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah, it's called Harder Brunch and we've been on for about five years. We actually just wrapped it up, but it's all still on, you know, online available. And there are interviews with either stand up comedians or chefs and food service industry people. And they would come on and I would cook an elaborate four course brunch, kind of break bread with them a little bit. And then.

[Pat Godwin]

So. Good.

[Dyke Michaels]

And then. And then sit down to do the podcast.

[Josh]

I just heard a very distinguished business guy. I mean, like, way, way up there in the world, and he was saying he prefers hiring people that worked in restaurants for whatever types of positions because. And you and I have both worked in restaurants, and you have too, Jeff.

[Christy]

Yeah.

[Josh]

Because if you can work in a restaurant, all you gotta. You learn right away, no one cares what color you are. They don't care what language you speak. If you can show up on time and do your job and stay sober enough to do it, you're in. But, yeah, this guy was saying. Yeah. People that have had restaurant experience tend to be really hard workers.

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah. High stress.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Dyke Michaels]

You got to think on your feet.

[Josh]

Yeah, absolutely. And now we were talking about your background. Background. You mentioned that you were raised by your grandparents. There's a lot of kind of. There's a sort of a bunch of famous people that have been raised by their grandparents, sometimes not knowing. No, that's the famous Jack Nicholson, for example, the actor. He thought his. Let's see, he thought it was his sister. Turned out it was his mother. Remember that whole thing?

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Josh]

Not from Chinatown. I mean, not much.

[Tom]

No, no, no, no.

[Josh]

You're raised by your grandparents. That's gonna. Are they still with us?

[Dyke Michaels]

They are not. My, My grandmother forbade me to listen to the Bob and Tom show in the 90s, of course.

[Josh]

So she was a smart woman.

[Dyke Michaels]

She. She said it was, quote, disgusting because of some of the, Some of the songs that were played back then, which. Nothing makes a teenager want to listen to something more than being told by their grandma. They can't listen to it.

[Tom]

Oh, yeah.

[Josh]

Such classics as Prison Bitch.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Josh]

Et cetera. What is, what is your. The background of your. Let me. How do I word this delicately. There's no way to word this delicately. If, if one were to guess your ethnic origin, it would be very tough. You could be.

[Dyke Michaels]

No, it wouldn't.

[Christy]

Which one was white and which one was black?

[Josh]

No, I was gonna say. I was gonna say, like, Samoan.

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah. I, I. Very ambiguous. Like, if you put a Mexican hat on Me, I look, I'm kind of Mexican. I'm kind of everything. Definitely. You've got Samoan before. No, I'm. I'm black and white. Yeah. Yeah, you're spot on, Josh. My. My mom, My mom's white, my dad's black, and that makes me biracial, which I have mixed feelings about.

[Christy]

Sure.

[Dyke Michaels]

It was scholarship opportunities. Oh, yeah. I've been in a lot of brochures.

[Christy]

Yes, you are very castable, as they say.

[Josh]

Now, the reason I asked that this is. This wasn't as. This just sounds much worse than it was my intention. Do people assume that you make a certain type of food based on your appearance?

[Dyke Michaels]

Oh, no, I don't think so.

[Josh]

Thank you.

[Dyke Michaels]

I think that's a fair question. Like, like, am I good at making soul food or something like that?

[Josh]

Like, you know how people are, Christy. They.

[Tom]

No, I know how you are, but.

[Josh]

I mean, you, I mean, you absolutely could. You could be half Asian.

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I definitely get Samoan. I think Samoan just because I'm a chubby guy. I think that's why I get that a lot.

[Josh]

Oh, sorry.

[Dyke Michaels]

But no, I definitely get that a lot. No, I don't know. I mean, yeah, sometimes you can look at somebody and be like, I bet that, you know, people from the south, you always assume that they're good cooks. You know, like, you look at someone and be like, ah, that guy knows how to make a, a. Make a rotisserie chicken.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, you look like you could, like make some good ribs.

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah, yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Run a barbecue place.

[Josh]

I'm gonna once again prejudge. Okay, this is a guess. I don't know the answer to this. I have no reason to know this. Were you more of an athlete or a nerd in school? And I, I'll, I'll, I'll write down my answer.

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah, yeah. Huge nerd.

[Josh]

Oh, I got it right.

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah, Big nerd. I'm a big fan of like all the, the nerd franchises. I love the, The Lord of the Rings. Big fan. Lord of the Rings. And they even made like a prequel series to it recently. I don't know, they. They tried to make it more diverse by putting like, like minorities in it, which is awesome. But it caused a problem for me because when I was watching it, they got this elf and he's this light skinned brother. Tightest fate I've ever seen. And it just completely took me out of it.

[Christy]

Yeah.

[Dyke Michaels]

Like, I might have believed somewhere between the Shire and Mordor there's a black barber shop.

[Josh]

Our guest is comedian Dyke Michaels. And that's his real name. You're gonna have to rewind the show to find out why it's called that. Christy.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Josh]

Give me a preview of what you have over there at the Silac Insurance news.

[Tom]

Well, we're going to talk about Mount Aetna for those of you who know what Mount Aetna is. It's a volcano. And we have opossum crossing a bridge. But we'll talk about that because it's a. When we come to bridge.

[Josh]

We'll cross that bridge when we come to it.

[Tom]

We have an escaped pet zebra again. And Star wars in the news today in a very weird way.

[Josh]

Yeah, yeah, this is very weird. A super nerdy, but at the same time ultra serious international intrigue. Star wars stuff.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Josh]

Where the, where sci fi meets reality.

[Tom]

Right. Right up your alley.

[Josh]

Yeah, it's very, very cool. Once again, we are reporting for Duty from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios and this is the Bob and Tom Show. Add to or continue the conversation. Check out the Bob and Tom show on Facebook. Get the link at bob and tom.com. this is the Bob and Tom show of Indiana.

[Christy]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom show live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Christy Lee sitting at the Silac Insurance Company news desk.

[Tom]

Hello.

[Christy]

Pat Godwin's in front of his keyboard and he's got his guitar.

[Jeff Oskay]

Hello.

[Josh]

Next to him there.

[Christy]

Hello, Pat. There's Jeff Osuke. Hey, Ace Cosby's there. Hey, I'm Josh Arnold and Tom, we're joined by a comedian slash chef. What a great combo.

[Josh]

Yeah, his name is Dyke Michaels. D Y K E. And Dyke is a professional chef and a stand up comedian.

[Tom]

Have you ever combined the two?

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah, I had a podcast.

[Tom]

Yeah, but I mean on stage, like.

[Dyke Michaels]

Oh, like cook an omelette while I'm telling jokes. No, not yet.

[Tom]

Not yet.

[Josh]

Now. Interesting. We, who were we just talking to? Who's the chef? Excuse me? Who is the, the comedian? That's the really great bread chef, Tom Papa. Tom Papa. He's like an expert. Sourdough bread on, on bread. I don't know what other comedians are really good cooks. That's a. I know the worst cook. That's a comedian. You're sitting next to him, Pat. God.

[Jeff Oskay]

Sorry. I'm getting a text about the dog.

[Josh]

I wonder why you really took the.

[Jeff Oskay]

Dog to the dog park yesterday and went to the pond. So there's a complete nightmare.

[Tom]

Well, yeah, you take him home, put him in the bathtub, give him a bath.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah, we did we did all that? Yeah.

[Tom]

All right.

[Josh]

What's happening then?

[Tom]

What's wrong?

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, the maid is at my house and the dog got off the crate.

[Josh]

So she was a little nervous about that. Okay. Good luck back to our guest.

[Tom]

You can't afford a maid.

[Jeff Oskay]

I do very well in my other job.

[Josh]

Job, by the way. Now, I'll get off track here. Pat's Comedy Special is going to be debuting on the Comedy Bar. What is it called again? The Dry Comedy Bar.

[Jeff Oskay]

It's called Dry Bar.

[Josh]

Yeah, the Dry Bar. Sorry. And we're trying to give it a title. You have to have the title by this afternoon. Yeah. So if you have any more suggestions. What. What is the.

[Tom]

I have one current.

[Josh]

Go to.

[Tom]

Oh, yeah. What. What is our current.

[Jeff Oskay]

Well, we have Steal My Identity and Patty G Raiders.

[Tom]

Oh, Patty G Rating.

[Pat Godwin]

What about Patty G. Raising the Bar.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, raising the Bar.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

Not. I don't know about that.

[Pat Godwin]

No. All right.

[Josh]

Patty G. Drinking the Bar Dry.

[Jeff Oskay]

How about Wet Dog?

[Tom]

You're not gonna like this one. This is from Herman.

[Jeff Oskay]

Go ahead.

[Tom]

Never Ready.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, that was.

[Christy]

Yeah, yeah. That's not bad.

[Jeff Oskay]

When I first started.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

Radio ready?

[Tom]

No. You're never ready.

[Jeff Oskay]

Never ready. Ready.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Josh]

The Patty G I really like, but except as rated.

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah.

[Josh]

Yeah. That's not. Everyone knows that's your nickname. Correct.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Josh]

So what was the other one? That contention?

[Jeff Oskay]

Steal My Identity.

[Christy]

That's pretty good.

[Josh]

I like that. It's one of the songs. I think it's pretty funny. Okay, let's go back over to the Silic Insurance News. Let's check in with Christy. Then we'll check in again with Dyke Michaels.

[Tom]

Sicily's Mount Aetna erupted on Monday, sending a cloud of smoke and ash several miles into the air. Sicily's president, Renato Schiffani. Hello. Said lava flows emitted in the eruption had not passed the natural containment area and posed no danger to the population.

[Christy]

Hey, the fire mountain to go a boom.

[Josh]

What are you running for?

[Tom]

The level of alert due to the volcanic activity was raised at the. Is it Catania Airport, but no immediate interruptions were reported.

[Josh]

Did you see any of the videos?

[Tom]

I did see them.

[Josh]

It looks like over the hill there exploding a series of large atomic bombs. Yeah. Wow. There you go. Look at that one. We have a picture now. That looks very scary.

[Tom]

The ash cloud emission had ended by early Monday afternoon. It was the 14th eruptive phase in recent months for Mount Aetna. This is in Sicily. In Italy. Do you have a song for us, Pat, about this or.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, no, no, no. My friend is actually from Sicily, you may know. Hold on. It's. Luigi is here. Hey, you're talking about a Catania in Sicily. You gotta have me on. I'm mounted as well.

[Josh]

My favorite. You got your accordion with you, Luigi?

[Jeff Oskay]

I have it right here. Let's see if it's up.

[Josh]

Do you have your girlfriend with you?

[Jeff Oskay]

There she is. Oh, she's in the back at Lisa. Gina. Not Lisa's.

[Josh]

Her sister.

[Christy]

Oh, boy, they're going to be in trouble.

[Jeff Oskay]

I got Gina. Statutory is here.

[Josh]

She's doing her math homework.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, she's off from school right now. She's not doing any homework. It's June.

[Josh]

Okay?

[Jeff Oskay]

She's taking a well deserved nap right now.

[Tom]

Okay.

[Jeff Oskay]

She is in the van.

[Christy]

Something unsettling about all that.

[Jeff Oskay]

I know. I am such a fan of Mount Etta. I would like to sing a song about my favorite, my favorite mountain.

[Josh]

Okay.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oh, hot deserve. Let me start it off. I almost said Volva. Wait, what is my mind? Where's my man?

[Christy]

You still got Lisa on the brain.

[Jeff Oskay]

Well, I know, but Lisa is her younger sister.

[Josh]

So younger.

[Christy]

She'S taking risks.

[Jeff Oskay]

Hot as a volcano here in Sicily. Edna is so beautiful. She's a sight to see. I like her to climb her. I don't mean to come off crass, but I want to Mount Aetna. She got a smoking ash. I want to Mount Aetna. She's got a smoking ash. Hey, she got a smoking ash. She raps very often. Smoking hot, you can see I love her lava. She's no insurance company. I went up on her today. She went down on me. Oh, that smoking ash. I could barely see. All that smoke and ash.

[Josh]

You could barely see.

[Jeff Oskay]

Very nice. You join along now. It's going well. I'm still in trouble for the other thing where I talked about her sister but don't want to end up burned like back in old Pompei. I caught a guy touching himself frozen still today. I just want to touch at the top and I'll get off in a flash. I want to Mount Etna. She got a smoking ash. I want to mount.

[Josh]

God, smoking ash.

[Jeff Oskay]

I must go and apologize.

[Josh]

Yeah, yeah, that's going to be roughly Gina Cator. I understand she's going to go to.

[Jeff Oskay]

Camp Statutory, not get.

[Josh]

Oh, sorry. Statutory. Get it dry. Sorry.

[Christy]

Get it right.

[Josh]

80. We got that. About 80%. Okay. That last, last chunk. We're speaking with comedian Dyke Michaels. Hey, hey. We found out the Dyke is a shot chef, stand up comedian, former podcaster, former owner of a food Truck. That's got to be a rough gig.

[Dyke Michaels]

It is. It's a lot harder than it than you think.

[Josh]

Yeah, you gotta have everything refrigerated and.

[Dyke Michaels]

You'Re moving stuff, you know, it's hot.

[Tom]

Oh, I can't imagine a lot of work.

[Josh]

Yeah. Did you buy the food truck ready to rock or did you have to build the thing?

[Dyke Michaels]

We bought it fabricated out, but I think the guy we bought it from was a little. Little shifty.

[Christy]

Oh.

[Dyke Michaels]

Like, everything was. Had, like sharp ends when we got in there. So you just be cooking, and then you'd look down and you're just bleeding from everywhere. It was just made out of sheet metal inside.

[Josh]

Now, you said you have an unusual background. As a child, you were raised by your grandparents. A lot of television. Do you have a fixation? You mentioned you were kind of a nerdy kid.

[Dyke Michaels]

Oh, yeah. I liked a lot of. A lot of stuff. I probably should have been canceled when I was 8 years old, though, because, like, my favorite TV show growing up was the Dukes of Hazzard.

[Christy]

Oh, yeah.

[Dyke Michaels]

And I remember, like, my grandma got me a Dukes of Hazzard beach towel for Christmas one year. And then, then we went to the poor people man made beach around here, and I would just unfurl a giant six foot Confederate flag. I know they had to confuse some people. Like one guy who's like, Darlene, he's doing it again. That little brown kid's dancing on the stars and bars.

[Josh]

Now. So you're still working as a chef. Do you do any food related jokes?

[Dyke Michaels]

I don't really have any food related jokes yet, but I. I need to. I need to.

[Josh]

Are there. Are there? I'm trying to. I was trying to think of if there's any. I know that Gaffigan did a whole hunk about eating.

[Tom]

Of course. That's such a Hot Pockets.

[Josh]

Yeah, of course. Of course. Now, do you eat a lot of junk food?

[Dyke Michaels]

I'm not a super big junk food guy, but because I was, like, around all these chefs and all this stuff too, it's like. Like you're eating stuff at the highest level. Like, the place I work, one of the best baking and pastry chefs is there, and he'll just. He'll just like, leave all his leavings in a giant pile for the staff. And so you just have to like, walk back and forth in front of, like, the best pastries you've ever seen, like 20 times during the day and try to avoid the temptation.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, I'd weigh a million pounds.

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah.

[Josh]

Oh, I'm Getting hungry just thinking about it. I'm trying to find a diet where it's just coffee and pastries.

[Tom]

Last time you had a pastry? Seriously?

[Josh]

I don't know, 2012, a few weeks ago.

[Tom]

Okay.

[Josh]

I went to. I went to that place the chick calls. We're so sorry to bother you. Yeah, yeah, they have a pastry. It's right across the street from where you work, as a matter of fact. Okay. Now that I think about it, yeah, they had some great stuff.

[Tom]

Okay. But, yeah, I just like to know that you treat yourself every now and then.

[Josh]

That day, I had. I think I mentioned I had cinnamon. Cinnamon toast crunch.

[Dyke Michaels]

French.

[Josh]

French toast. Oh, wow. Oh, decadent. Oh. It was like they somehow infused the sugar with more sugar and they made it crunchy. Oh. Oh, my God. I spent the rest of the day going, that much sugar in a long time. It was great. Yeah, but don't you love a great pastry with coffee?

[Christy]

Oh, yeah, sure.

[Josh]

Yeah. Oh, that makes you making me hungry now. Do you bake as well?

[Dyke Michaels]

Not very well. Every time I bake something, I just call it rustic because it's. It's. It's a little.

[Tom]

It looks a little rustic.

[Dyke Michaels]

It looks a little rustic. Yeah. But I found out if you call something rustic, people don't ask a lot of questions.

[Josh]

Now, Christy, do we have time for one more? One more piece here? Maybe we don't. Just give me the teaser. What do we got over there?

[Tom]

We have the Mackinac Bridge in the news. We have a zebra on the run in Tennessee. We have fruit flies on cocaine. We have buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz.

[Josh]

Buzz, buzz, buzz buzzwood for you, ladies and gentlemen.

[Tom]

And of course, we have our Star Wars CIA connection.

[Josh]

Ah, wait till you hear this. This is really something that is quite the story. The serious business of the CIA getting mixed up with the fantasy world of Star Wars. For real.

[Christy]

Turns out the Rebellion was responsible for introducing crack to the inner cities.

[Josh]

Yes, it is almost that elaborate. Right now I want to remind you about the best. The best gift for this is so obvious. For Father's Day. Are you kidding me? Raycon earbuds. The perfect summer accessory for dads out there. Parentheses, he said for moms, too. Raycon. Their latest model. Better than ever. 32 hour battery life. Are you kidding me? How about this? They've also got something called multi point connectivity, so you can pair two devices to at once. You can go on a nice walk with your doggies and be listening to, say, this show or perhaps some great music. Whatever you're into, we don't care at Raycon, they are happy to have you listen to whatever you want to listen to. You can even listen to morons talking on the radio. Wait a minute. I already said that. Raycon earbuds available in a variety of colors. It's the sound that matters though. And they've got great sound. They cost half as much as those, those little white ones that stick out of your ears and fall in the parking lot. They've got special gel tipped somethings. What do they call them? Christy?

[Tom]

Gel tips.

[Josh]

Gel tips. Okay, very good. And so they'll stay in your ear. They fit every ear because they have different size gel tips. Check them out. Buyraycon.com Tom they have an absolute happiness guarantee. So you're gonna like them. Buyraycon.com Tom by the way, 15% off Raycon's best selling earbuds today. That's buyraycon.com Tom the perfect Father's Day gift. Buyraycon.com tom Coming up, we're gonna hang out with comedian Dyke Michaels and we're gonna find out about how the CIA is connected to Star wars for real. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Christy]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom show live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Christy Pat, Jeff Oskay, Ace Cosby. I'm Josh.

[Josh]

I keep stepping on my. Oh, I'm sorry, What, what is that song? No, I just was making a. I managed to screw up this interview so many times, I figured I'd continue to do so.

[Pat Godwin]

You're good, Tom.

[Christy]

Don't worry about it. Hey, I have a quick question about the NBA Finals are coming up. Are the Indiana Pacers named after pace cars from the Indy 500?

[Josh]

Horses.

[Christy]

Horses?

[Jeff Oskay]

Really?

[Christy]

They used to have pace horses at the Indy 500.

[Tom]

No.

[Josh]

That's interesting.

[Jeff Oskay]

I know that's very quaint.

[Josh]

I think it can go either way. We have a great. This is Tom speaking. By the way. We have a guest in the studio. He is comedian Dyke Michaels. Hello. We've learned a little something about you, but not everything. And so I'm going to continue to ask questions that may get me in trouble. Now we know that you're all, you're also, you also work at a restaurant as a chef.

[Dyke Michaels]

Yep.

[Josh]

But you're a full time standup comedian as well. You have an unusual background. You were raised by your grandparents. Now let's, let's do it this way. What other jobs did you have before being a comedian and before being a chef, did you have Any other interesting?

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah, briefly, I was a bouncer at a strip club.

[Christy]

Oh, no kidding?

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah. It combined two of my least favorite things, physical altercations and glitter. I was working there, man. There are these two different girls that dance under the same stage name.

[Josh]

Oh boy.

[Dyke Michaels]

Privilege. So to tell them apart, we called them white privilege and black privilege.

[Christy]

White privilege, of course, got the better time slots.

[Dyke Michaels]

It was pretty messed up because I think black privilege was actually Puerto Rican. It was a bad club.

[Josh]

Yeah, I, we, we knew a guy that worked here that was also a strip club DJ and tough gig, a.

[Christy]

Lot of drama, a lot of unnecessary.

[Josh]

He did it for a long time, but he hated it.

[Dyke Michaels]

Man, it's like a soap opera. I always thought there should be a TV show that just takes place and just the, the daily workings of. Inside of a strip club.

[Christy]

Sure.

[Dyke Michaels]

Because you'd be amazed at how quickly nudity becomes just like part of your job. You know, someone's just sitting there complaining about work. You know, you kind of forget that they're topless after, after the first day or two.

[Pat Godwin]

You know, that's how it is here with Kristen.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Christy]

Was there a den mother of sorts?

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah, yeah, they call it a house mom.

[Christy]

A house mom? Yes. Yeah. Where that's an older, maybe retired stripper a lot of times who sort of just oversees the girls back in the locker room or, you know, dressing room.

[Tom]

Make sure they don't fight or something and kind of.

[Christy]

Yeah, kind of.

[Dyke Michaels]

They have all this stuff if they need, you know, makeup or lady stuff. My first day on the job working there, I saw a fight in the parking lot between the house mom and a stripper and they were fighting over loose Xanax.

[Christy]

That's as sad as a.

[Jeff Oskay]

Anything is hilarious.

[Dyke Michaels]

And the house mom was the stripper's actual mother too.

[Josh]

Yeah. Maybe your string is showing. Yeah, maybe. Maybe it's time to get a better gig. Glad you segued into the world of cooking.

[Christy]

My dad was offered a job to be a. He was a DJ for like dances and, and weddings and, and he was offered a strip club job and he was going to take it because the money was okay. My mom said, hey, you. You have four boys. How. What are you going to tell them? You do.

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah.

[Christy]

And he was like, yeah, maybe I shouldn't do this.

[Josh]

I bet you were really disappointed, dad.

[Christy]

Even four year old dad, it's.

[Josh]

Take your son to work today. Dad. I want to meet this lady you call Mercedes. What do you mean? Galaxy's a. Okay, Sorry we're hanging out with A comedian Dyke Michaels. We also have Christy Lee over there. She is at the SILAC Insurance news desk. What's at happening?

[Tom]

A new report out there reveals the CIA operated a Star wars fan website as part of a covert global communication network. According to 404Media, independent security researcher Ciro Santelli Santilli identified.

[Jeff Oskay]

Agent Zero.

[Tom]

It's his name. Ciro Santilla identified Star Wars Web.net as a CIA run site established around 2010.

[Christy]

Were they looking for in that nerd?

[Tom]

The platform believed to have been used to discreetly exchange messages. Josh. With intelligence operatives worldwide.

[Christy]

Oh, okay. So they weren't searching for people. They were.

[Josh]

Yeah. You got a guy that's, you know, working undercover in China.

[Tom]

Yeah, yeah.

[Josh]

And he can go on this thing and he knows or. Wow.

[Tom]

Yeah. Santilli's investigation also uncovered several other websites likely tied to the agency, including pages focused on extreme sports, Brazilian music, and even a comedian fan site. Oh, doesn't name the comedian. Is it all comedians? Suggesting a broader strategy of using seemingly innocuous websites for secure communication.

[Christy]

Interesting.

[Josh]

So you. Wow, that's. That's so interesting that. I mean, it's. People are now going to think that Star wars is actually on the dark side because they're doing covert operations with. You know, I don't like it when they give away their secrets.

[Christy]

Right. I. I'm the same.

[Josh]

I always say, like when USA Today would go, tomorrow we're going to be invading. Hey, hey, hey.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Josh]

They get USA Today over the there. Shut up. I like it when the secret agencies stay secret. I don't need to know.

[Christy]

I'm very pro. Covert operation.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Christy]

I think there should be more of it. I don't know how some of these people are still living across the world. We can't get somebody to tap Putin with an umbrella. All of a sudden he's dead.

[Pat Godwin]

But you wonder what, like now any site could be a CIA. Like I wonder if that one side I look at only Wookies. I wonder if that's a CIA site.

[Christy]

Wouldn't a good place for the CIA to hide online be CIA.com? no one's going to assume.

[Josh]

Yeah, but see, this is suggesting that the Siths killed jfk.

[Dyke Michaels]

It was uncovered because the guy's screen name was Agent Double O. Jar Jar.

[Josh]

Or something like that.

[Tom]

Uh, oh, that's Tom's favorite character, Jar Jar Binks.

[Josh]

Yeah, there's a poor Jar Jar got drummed out of the movies because of political correct.

[Christy]

No, we've tried to explain this to you. You have to listen to this there was some political correctness. People who were upset about. But it was mostly because he was annoying and unfunny. That's why they faded him out.

[Josh]

Oh, I thought he was really funny.

[Christy]

We have a self proclaimed nerd here. Dyke Michaels.

[Dyke Michaels]

You're the only one, Tom. I will say this. It was a, it was a dyke. It was a bummer because the, the, the young actor who played Jar Jar was a like a young black dude. And they got this part and they were telling, they were gassing him up and they were like, you are going to be the next Chewbacca. You are going to be beloved for generations to come. You are part of this pantheon of Star Wars. And then he became the most hated character.

[Tom]

That's so sad.

[Christy]

Wasn't he a member of like bring into noise, bring into funk or something?

[Dyke Michaels]

I didn't know that.

[Josh]

Jar Jar or the actor.

[Christy]

Yeah, the actor who plays.

[Josh]

I Bring into funk.

[Dyke Michaels]

Misa. Bring in the noise.

[Josh]

You heard my favorite song, Funky Nassau. I do love that song, by the way.

[Tom]

What? Funky Nassau.

[Josh]

Oh, that's such a great song.

[Pat Godwin]

I have no idea what you're talking about.

[Jeff Oskay]

Nassau is funky.

[Josh]

Nassau's gone funky. Nassau's got soul. No, Is it old or new?

[Christy]

Because with you it's either brand new or whale.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yes, it's old.

[Josh]

It's very old.

[Christy]

Oh, okay.

[Josh]

And who does it, Pat? You remember who does? No, it's like, like the beginning of the end or something. Here we go. This is a little bit of funky NASA is a reggae, big horns, everything I love. What is this samba? Is it called the beginning of the.

[Tom]

Beginning of the end? That's right. Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

We've got a dog on beat now.

[Tom]

1971.

[Josh]

That's great.

[Christy]

It's all right.

[Josh]

It's all right.

[Christy]

Yeah, yeah. It's not.

[Josh]

It's not all right.

[Christy]

No, it is all right.

[Josh]

It's earth changing. Great.

[Tom]

Well, I'm sure for you at a young 1971 age, it was. It meant something to you.

[Christy]

Yeah, yeah.

[Josh]

No, it's eternal. It's greatness lives forever. I just love that Funky NASA. There's a thing where he keeps repeating Funky NASA.

[Christy]

Oh, yeah. I love that. When they don't know what else to write.

[Tom]

Throw something on there.

[Josh]

Not the best lyrics since Papa Umau MAU. I love nonsense lyrics. If you're just joining us. Hello. This is the Bob and Tom Show. Thanks for joining us. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios hanging out with comedian Dyke Michael, former strip club bouncer, professional chef and Comedian. What else do we need to know about you? Anything else of interest?

[Dyke Michaels]

That sounds insane. I list it all in a row like that.

[Josh]

You know what I haven't asked you about. I'm on thin ice here. I have no notes here. Do you have any adult personal relationships of any particular sphere?

[Dyke Michaels]

Oh, like a wife or girlfriend.

[Christy]

But he asks it like he's an alien learning.

[Josh]

I'm trying to leave the door open.

[Jeff Oskay]

Covering all bases, whatever.

[Dyke Michaels]

Boyfriend, girlfriend, they. Them. Yeah.

[Josh]

Yes, anything. Is anything going on in that?

[Dyke Michaels]

No, I'm familiar with the concept. I remember.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Dyke Michaels]

It's better. No, I've been. I've been single. I feel like it's part of being a comedian is either either you're single or your wife runs your. Your business for you, you know?

[Josh]

Have you ever been married?

[Dyke Michaels]

I have not, no.

[Christy]

You were engaged, though.

[Dyke Michaels]

You. I was pre engaged.

[Christy]

Okay.

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah, I was engaged enough to change my name, but you're right not to buy a ring.

[Josh]

Are you still on speaking terms with the aforementioned fiance?

[Dyke Michaels]

On most of them, yeah. Most?

[Josh]

There's more than one.

[Dyke Michaels]

I mean, most of the X's. I feel like I'm in pretty good terms.

[Josh]

Wow.

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah.

[Josh]

How many X's you got?

[Dyke Michaels]

There's a lot. There's a decent amount.

[Christy]

Do you ever occasionally hook up with any of them?

[Dyke Michaels]

Oh, like, go back to the. Well, yeah, man. I'll tell you what. Around. Around, like, Covid times. Like, I hit up a lot.

[Christy]

Yeah, yeah.

[Dyke Michaels]

Like. Like once you could start going out in public. Yeah, I had some. I revisited some of the old hits.

[Josh]

Did you get the. Now, once again, you mentioned you were raised by your grandparents. Did you get the sex talk from your grandmother?

[Dyke Michaels]

I. I got the sex talk from my mom. And she tried to be so scientific as a family full of scientists, and she was very uncomfortable, and she said, let me see if I can. She said when. She was like, well, when you become a man and you become excited, your penis will become engorged.

[Josh]

So it's very, very straightforward science.

[Dyke Michaels]

And the very first thing I thought about was, like, an Indians game. Base is loaded. Someone hits a grand slam, and every man stands up to cheer and they're excited and they just start going. And I started to cry, and I was like, I never want to be a man. That sounds terrible.

[Christy]

So that kind of excitement.

[Josh]

Yeah, I can see why you're really into Star Wars.

[Pat Godwin]

Do you do the dating apps?

[Dyke Michaels]

I don't. I don't like the dating apps much because I feel like you can always tell what messed up someone's last relationship from their current bio. You know, it's always something like, Cat32, I'm not going to be invested in no cryptocurrency.

[Christy]

You're like, what happened?

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah, and Cat lost a lot of money on that hawk to a coin.

[Josh]

Now, I do know one thing about you and that is that you are recommended by Mr. Jeff Oscar to come on the show.

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah.

[Josh]

So you guys, how do you know each other?

[Dyke Michaels]

He was one of the very first real comedians that I worked with. I was doing a show, it was my first big show being an open micr and I was kind of bragging to all my friends and they were like, who else is on? I said, Jeff Oskay. And they're were like, he's a real comedian. And they said it very concerned and they were like, you're opening up for him, right? They didn't somehow put you up? And I was like, yeah, I assume so. And then I get, I get to the show and I meet Jeff and I'm like, hey, I'm a brand new comedian and I'm gonna be opening up for you. And he was like, actually, I can't do that, man. I got another show I gotta get to, so I'm gonna just go up first and then leave. And that in the business is called burying like a new comedian. And so I think he could tell how distraught I was and I went into a full blown panic attack. And then he took five minutes to tell me that I was gonna do fine and.

[Pat Godwin]

And you did do fine. And I went up and bombed for 20 minutes just so you would look better to you, sir.

[Josh]

The old Toledo method.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, I, I, oh, I went so Toledo.

[Christy]

It was horrible.

[Josh]

Wow. Well, thanks very much. Been fun hanging out with you. Now we have what coming up. Christy Lee, in the realm of the world of news, we didn't get to our Mackinac Bridge story, did we?

[Tom]

We can do that right now. We have time. Michigan police nabbed a possum that was trying to cross the Mackinac Bridge. The Mackinac Bridge Authority said a passing motorist spotted the marsupial walking across the landmark bridge. Animal was captured, escorted off in a cage before being released on the Mackinaw City side of the structure.

[Christy]

Well, was he headed that way? I don't know because what if he wasn't? He's gonna cross the bridge again and.

[Tom]

Lost his family or on the other side.

[Josh]

Oh yes, my possum buddies are all in St. Ignace. Do you know what the Mackinac Bridge is Dyke. No, it connects the upper peninsula of Michigan to the lower peninsula of Michigan. It's a. It looks like. Like the Golden Gate. It's that type of beautiful suspension bridge and famous.

[Pat Godwin]

Terrifying.

[Josh]

Yeah, it's famous for having a car blown off. Oh, what is a Hugo? So, you know.

[Christy]

Well, it's a very important landmark to town.

[Josh]

Yes, it's gorgeous.

[Dyke Michaels]

Last time I was up there, I think I was like eight years old. So. Yeah, probably. Probably saw it.

[Josh]

But it's. It's a beautiful. Now one thing about that story that got me, I changed it around because it said an.

[Tom]

Opossum.

[Josh]

Opossum.

[Tom]

Well, that's.

[Josh]

But it's.

[Tom]

That would be correct grammatically.

[Josh]

No, it wouldn't. Because you pronounce it possum.

[Tom]

Yeah, but it's still no.

[Christy]

Yeah, exactly. You still have to go.

[Tom]

Yeah, you still have to say and opossum.

[Josh]

So you don't. But you don't say, oh, there was. And possum.

[Tom]

Well, you would say there's a possum.

[Josh]

So both the N and the O are silent.

[Christy]

No, the O is not silent.

[Josh]

In opossum you're supposed to say opossum.

[Christy]

Yes, you can say possum or you can say opossum. Yeah, so it's an opossum.

[Josh]

So you could say Mackinac. So this whole story is about silent, silent letters. And by the way, I've always pronounced it the Mackinac Bridge in Mackinac Island. Okay, and Mackinac island is famous from what film? Anyone? One.

[Tom]

Somewhere in time.

[Josh]

Somewhere in time they film. But the last time we got talking about this, I got a very lengthy letter from someone about how you're supposed to pronounce it.

[Tom]

Oh, is it supposed to be.

[Josh]

I give up. I don't know.

[Tom]

Macanac.

[Josh]

I think it's pronounced fudge land. They're famous for their fudge. You see?

[Christy]

So famous that we all clearly knew what you were talking about.

[Jeff Oskay]

We all want a different way in our heads.

[Josh]

I'm surprised I say fudge and you don't light it up. Oh, he said fudge.

[Christy]

How about things aren't working, go with.

[Pat Godwin]

An easy fetch, you know, Dubai chocolate and then Mackinaw Fudge. Yeah, yeah, it was popular.

[Josh]

Fudge pizza, nothing.

[Tom]

Fudge and pizza.

[Christy]

Again. So confused when you're not getting laughs. Easy attack.

[Pat Godwin]

So why did they pick it up? Do they not allow possums on Mackinac Island?

[Tom]

I wanted to get run away over.

[Josh]

They don't want somebody to swerve to avoid and drive off the bridge.

[Tom]

There was a baby possum right here on that. One of these side streets.

[Josh]

It was.

[Tom]

No, no, no, no. I almost got out of the car.

[Josh]

There's a juicy one right now about 100 yards from our driveway.

[Tom]

Don't tell me that.

[Christy]

Hey, flies got to eat something. No, flies gotta lay eggs somewhere.

[Tom]

I had. I really had to. Like, I stopped the car. Do I get out? I didn't have my leather gloves with me. I'm like, do I move it? What do I do?

[Christy]

Yeah, you did the right thing.

[Tom]

I did what?

[Pat Godwin]

You leave it every time, right?

[Christy]

The answer every time is leave that animal.

[Josh]

No.

[Pat Godwin]

If it's nature.

[Christy]

Nature, maybe. If it's a turtle.

[Tom]

No.

[Christy]

What do you mean, no?

[Tom]

It got. It did move out of the way eventually, but. And it wasn't there when I went back to work the next day, so I guess got away.

[Christy]

Well, Tom's right.

[Josh]

It's in a Goodyear tire right now. Guys, between.

[Tom]

Don't tell me that. Tell me that.

[Christy]

It's spin cycling.

[Josh]

If you need a guy to relocate a raccoon, I've got a guy.

[Tom]

Oh, I've got a guy. Just paid him.

[Josh]

And he doesn't just put him in the cage and throw him in the river.

[Christy]

Old Rifle Joe.

[Josh]

No, he. I got really go. I'm sorry. Right now, I want to remind you, the Bob and Tom show is brought to you by our friends at the Silac Insurance Company. Maybe retirement's down the road a ways and you're wondering, hey, I'm not gonna get a paycheck when I quit working. Well, that's interesting to know. And perhaps it's time to get yourself all figured out for the future so you can sleep for the next night or two, knowing that down the road, you're gonna be okay. Cause you're gonna have a paycheck coming your way. That's what an annuity is all about. Who are the annuities experts? Of course. It's the folks at the Silac Insurance Company. And by the way, you've been probably hearing about the stock market. And if you don't care about it, well, guess what? You probably have a lot of money in your retirement fund invested in the stock market. You may. Well, maybe not. What's the point? The point is an annuity is designed to counter what they call the volatility of the market. So you can count on that money coming your way, no matter what's happening on Wall street, et cetera, et cetera. And by the way, with an annuity from the Silac Insurance Company. You cannot outlive your money. So find out what I'm talking about. Find out what a Silac annuity can do for you. Some restrictions apply. Learn [e-mail] oh, there's another easy way to find out about annuities. Just for some information, pick up your phone and call £250. So you, you just hit that little hashtag thing £250 and say the keywords lifetime income. That's £250 and say out loud lifetime income just for some information or go to silacins.com and that's S I L A C silacins.com and you can just go to the Baba Tom website. Also. We'll link you up there. An annuity from the Silac Insurance Company. Give yourself some peace of mind for now and for the future. Silac Plan on it. Live on it. Thank you very much. Coming up, we have more exciting news. We're going to hang out with our comedian guests guest Dyke Michaels. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show. Just gotta get a hold of us. Call, text or email. Get all the contact information you [e-mail] this is the Bob and Tom show, baby on for you. Coming up.

[Christy]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom show live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Christy Lee, Pat Godwin, Jeff Fos here, Ace Cosby, I'm Josh Arnold and Tom, we're joined by a new comedian friend looking for love.

[Josh]

It's a new feature on the show.

[Christy]

Oh, you're on the hunt.

[Tom]

Bob and Tom dating site.

[Josh]

Oh, that'd be great. Yeah, bring in, bring in comedians and ruin someone else. Oh, wait a minute. I'm sorry. We have a comedian, Dyke Michaels, hanging out with us. Hey, it's also a chef does two things and we're not sure if he does both of them well or just one. We'll find out. Right now we have Christy Lee over there at the Silac Insurance news desk. Christy, what have you got?

[Tom]

A pet zebra caused chaos on a Tennessee highway over the weekend and is still on the run. The zebra got out Saturday afternoon in Murfreesboro, just southeast of Nashville. Bolted onto I State Interstate 24 near Joby Jackson Parkway, weaving through traffic, dodging cars. Rutherford county deputies briefly shut down the interstate as the zebra ran across both sides of the highway and later disappeared into the nearby woods. As of yesterday, the animal was still missing. A patrol deputy spotted it again Sunday snapped a photo. The zebra had just been purchased on Friday night and escaped the next day. Tennessee law, by the way, does allow zebras, along with llamas, camels and giraffes to be kept at as pets without a special permit.

[Josh]

So these idiots had it for less than a day. Yeah, well, that zebra's got a better ass than my wife and it don't talk back.

[Christy]

I told you, we buy the fence first, zebra second.

[Dyke Michaels]

Yeah, I stand in solidarity with the zebra because I'm half black, half white and I've fled the authorities before on foot.

[Josh]

Really?

[Christy]

You understand?

[Josh]

It's those cars are black and whites for a reason. Oh, this is interesting.

[Tom]

Pat has a song about zebras, I believe.

[Josh]

Oh, good. Go ahead, Pat. I just. I'm just reading this article about why zebras have stripes. Well, fascinating.

[Jeff Oskay]

Zebras also, they. They like to. They don't like to be confined. Remember the one that escaped from the San Francisco. San Francisco Zoo?

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

And was just like wandering around town for weeks before they were able to catch it. A little story about that. Here we go. Oh, well I'm the type of zebra, zebra who will never settle down I broke out of the zoo and I roam around the town I like to eat some bark an apple if it's ripe it's hard to blend in a park you know time on account of the stripes they call me the wanderer the zebra wanderer My stripes go up and down and up and down hey, I'm old Marty from Madagascar. The movie didn't get it right. Zebras aren't from there. Try to pet me, me I will bite don't put a saddle on my back I'll make you cry Kick you in the face Give you a three week black guy Here comes my handlers with tranquilizers My stripes go up and down no.

[Tom]

So if you're driving in Tennessee and you see a zebra, you might want.

[Christy]

To call Reno Collier Country.

[Tom]

Yeah, it is Murphysboro.

[Josh]

That's right. It's a zebra on the loose.

[Tom]

Wouldn't it be great if it's. It was.

[Josh]

You know why zebras have stripes? Why now? This isn't a joke. I just googled this. They. It's apparently confounded evolutionary biologists for years, but now a team believes that they have systematically solved the puzzle. According to the journal Nature Communications, the zebra stripes ward off horse flies and TTSE flies.

[Tom]

Wow, you were right on it.

[Pat Godwin]

They also think it's so. It's confusing to predators. So they. When they're in a big pack, they can't tell which one's the lame one to go after because they. They get confused with the stripes as well.

[Tom]

I call them together.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Josh]

Also, do you know that you can take one of those barcode things and wipe it on a zebra? It'll tell you how much it costs.

[Tom]

Oh, sure.

[Christy]

Nice.

[Josh]

Yeah, I read that. That I. If that's true.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, Pat mentioned it. How come we are riding zebras? Put a saddle, apparently.

[Josh]

I remember that. Yeah. Reading that there. It can be done, but it's extremely difficult.

[Tom]

Hard to break.

[Dyke Michaels]

Ah, you know that song, Wild zebras can't be broken.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, forgot about that hit.

[Tom]

Speaking of flies, Dr. Adrian Rothenfluth says flies respond to cocaine much like humans, sharing about 75% of addiction related genes.

[Josh]

Wait a minute. So some guy was able to con some institute to give him money? Yeah, to buy cocaine for fruit flies.

[Tom]

Yep.

[Christy]

I have a fly that's hooked on cocaine in my kitchen. He just keeps talking about wanting to open a restaurant. Shut up about it.

[Tom]

Cocaine activates bitter taste receptors in flies, which normally deters them.

[Josh]

How do they know that?

[Tom]

So when those receptors are silenced, Tom, the flies begin preferring cocaine laced sugar water. Researchers say the study offers insight into the biology of addiction. I'm sure you want more information on this, and if you do, you can find it in the Journal of Neuroscience.

[Josh]

They have. Do they need to go to flies to study addiction? Look around. I. It just seems weird. Weird?

[Tom]

I'm sure they're just trying to find a. Well, I don't know. Do they lies on cocaine?

[Josh]

Did. What do they give them to bring them back to Earth? A little bit of reefer.

[Tom]

Oh, wears off after time.

[Josh]

All right. Blossoms don't bogart that thing. Blow some smoke into the fruit flies, Dennis. Okay. Good luck with it, by the way. Now, do you guys remember? I've just been in my zebra hunk over here. Okay, do you guys remember what a Z donk is?

[Tom]

A zebra and a donkey.

[Josh]

But there's a distinction.

[Tom]

What do you mean there's a distinction?

[Pat Godwin]

Donkey is the dad.

[Christy]

Is that it?

[Josh]

Yeah, I forget which is which. I'm trying to remember. That's why I asked you. No, I asked you if you remembered.

[Christy]

You asked us under the guise of you already having the answer.

[Josh]

I know the answer.

[Tom]

No, you don't.

[Josh]

It's a hybrid of a donkey and a Z. Donkey. Donkey is the dad. You're right, Jeff. The zebra is the mom. A zonkey has a zebra father and a donkey mother. A badonka. Donkey has a huge ass.

[Pat Godwin]

Totally worth it.

[Jeff Oskay]

Get out of that nicely.

[Josh]

I have no idea. We are once again wearing all stripes in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show. Thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom Show. Sponsored in part by Job Baba House, the official coffee and refreshments of the Bob and Tom Show. The United States Soccer Federation presents the.

[Jeff Oskay]

U. S. Soccer Podcast inside the opening 45 seconds.

[Josh]

What a goal with that cannon of a left foot. I'll leave it at 1.

[Jeff Oskay]

Never miss a game.

[Tom]

What a start for the United States.

[Dyke Michaels]

Shot for distance. What a goal.

[Josh]

Never miss a moment.

[Jeff Oskay]

Exquisite. From the San Diegan.

[Josh]

Can he finish? Yes, he can. The U.S. soccer Podcast.

[Jeff Oskay]

Follow and listen on your favorite platform.