The BOB & TOM Show - March 27, 2026

Summary

The BOB & TOM Show – March 27, 2026

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Overview

This episode of The BOB & TOM Show blends signature comedy, witty banter, offbeat news, listener letters, sports, and musical interludes with the regular crew: Tom Griswold, Christy Lee, Josh Arnold, Pat Godwin, Jess Hooker, Jeff Oskay, and Ace Cosby. Highlights include hilarious baseball parody, quirky small-town names, penis humor, sex and sperm science (especially in space), food oddities across America, and more. There’s also reflection on live events, listener interaction, and call-backs to classic bits.

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Key Segments & Discussion Points

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1. Harry Caray Baseball Parody & Church of Baseball (01:27 - 06:47)

• Guest Stand-Up: Jeff Oskay (channeling Dan St. Paul) delivers a hilarious Harry Caray impression, narrating a biblical-era baseball game—complete with jokes about manna vendors, Lazarus’ resurrection, and Jesus hitting a "basis empty grand slam.” (02:28)
  • “Fans, we haven’t had a mirac’ go like that since we had fishes and loaves night here.” – Jeff Oskay (03:30)
  • “David 1, Goliath nothing—ends a long win streak for the big guy.” – Jeff Oskay (06:13)
• Roundtable Banter: Classic Bob & Tom repartee about baseball, nostalgia for old-school announcers, and poking fun at female stadium voices.

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2. Health Check-Ins & Hyjinx (07:26 - 08:45)

• Josh’s Health: Josh Arnold discusses his current battle with diverticulitis and restrictive diets ("No, I can have... like I'm having a turkey sandwich... but only sourdough or gluten free" – Josh Arnold, 07:40)
• Sperm in Space Tease: Tom hints at a future 'hunk' about semen science and astronaut masturbation in space, foreshadowing the running theme of the day. (08:15)

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3. Live Events Recap & Listener Letters (08:45 - 13:09)

• Cincinnati Live Show Reflection: The crew thanks fans for a great event in Kentucky/Cincinnati, notes charity T-shirts for Brave Gowns (superhero capes for kids in hospitals), and discusses hidden coordinates on souvenir shirts.
• Town Names & Quirky Geography:
  • Odd and suggestive town names like French Lick, Wanker's Corner (OR), Hooker (OK), and Dick Shooter (ID) inspire puns and jokes (13:32)

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4. Comedy Music: “Older Than Famous Dead Guys” by Heywood Banks (19:14 - 20:54)

• Listener Retirement Tribute and playing of Heywood Banks’ song, celebrating longevity with morbid humor.

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5. School Trip Memories & More Letters (23:35 – 28:51)

• School Trips: Tom and Christy reminisce about D.C. trips and bus antics—including bridge phobias, upchucking out windows, acquisition of old nudist magazines (“Western Nudist was really... disturbing when you see the whole family naked” – Tom Griswold, 29:18)
• Classic Childhood Antics: Reference to “filling up” on the bus, boyish mischief, and the lost art of finding "a little bit of flesh" before the internet.

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6. Music & Sports: Walk-Up Songs, NCAA Brackets, and Baseball (11:04, 39:47, 46:14)

• Walk-Up Music: Listeners suggest Avenged Sevenfold’s “Hail to the King” as Tom’s entrance theme (12:05)
• Sports Update: The sports desk highlights March Madness games with some friendly gambling/pool banter. Purdue’s nail-biter, Illinois’ win, and family gym betting bracket stories make for an entertaining sports sidebar. (39:47)
• Mountain Dew Promo: Free Baja Blast for 420 ft+ home runs = pot jokes and food stoner humor (42:19)
  • “When that fella was in his prime, he could throw some heat. This year his ERA has ballooned to a hefty 6-6-6.” – Jeff Oskay (06:13)
• Tom Brady & NFL: The show covers his phantom return rumors and Olympics flag football aim (44:01)

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7. Weird Towns & Pat Godwin’s Musical Tour (49:18 – 63:36, 61:43)

• Bug Tussle Sign Theft: Real-life town name larceny; cross-talk about the town’s pop culture origins (Petticoat Junction, Pokémon, etc.)
• Global Oddities: Christy reads a long list of real towns with bizarre or risqué names: Belchertown, Lick Fork, Climax (multiple states), Ding Dong, Knockemstiff, Bushy Gap, No Place, Wham Bottom, and more.
  • “There’s a hooker. Oklahoma.” – Christy Lee (13:54)
  • “Bushy Gap... Oh, lately it’s a lot less bushy.” – Tom Griswold & crew (53:32)
• Pat Godwin Song: He stitches the towns into a bawdy, clever road-trip song, winding through Banger, Dick Shooter, Intercourse, Sweet Lips, Beaverlick, and more (62:03).
  • “I’ll drive to Banger all night long, but first it’s Morehead then Intercourse...” – Pat Godwin (62:14)

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8. Food Weirdness & Regional Eats (129:13 – 134:13)

• Odd American Foods: The show gets into “Frogmore Stew,” “barbecue spaghetti,” “cannibal sandwich” (raw beef and onion), “scrapple,” “Butter Burger,” Kool-Aid soaked pickles, tater tot hot dish, disco fries, and more.
  • “Cannibal sandwich...uncooked ground beef sandwich.” – Jess Hooker (130:27)
  • “Tater tot hot dish... casserole of meat, vegetables and tater tots” – Tom Griswold (133:52)
• Food Memories: Jess, Christy, and Tom offer opinions on chili with cinnamon (Cincinnati style), regional tastes, and healthiness (do NOT eat carpet after sewage!).

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9. Sex, Sperm & Ejaculation Science, both Earthly and Astronautical (79:06 – 89:23)

• Prostate Health: Harvard study claims that 21 ejaculations/month can cut prostate cancer risk by 33%, health/solo/teamwork jokes (79:15)
  • “21 ejaculations per month equals 252 times annually, or almost 70% of the days.” – Christy Lee (80:41)
  • “All that is is coming up here in the Bob and Tom program right now. I want to talk to you about your credit cards. Yikes.” – Tom Griswold, transitioning as only Tom can. (14:13)
• Masturbation Lore: Jokes about myths (“go blind,” “hairy palms,” religion, acne).
• Space Sex: Australian researchers calculate astronaut orgasm would push one’s body backward in microgravity. Serious-silly chat about conception in space, sperm navigation, and technical details (83:08 onward).
  • “So when you ejaculate, it pushes you backward.” – Christy Lee (83:52)
• Sperm Quality & Abstinence: Extended abstinence may damage sperm DNA; question of optimum “interval between releases” discussed semi-scientifically (101:06).
• Sexual Orgasm Face Study: Real-world facial expressions in orgasm resemble expressions of pain (106:14).

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10. Penis Sizes, Measurements & State Rankings (108:02 – 113:17)

• Statistical Roundtable: 90% of US men claim to have measured their penis. Average self-reported size: 6.34” erect; Iowa is “#1” for size and “growing”. Girth versus length, over/underestimation, units of measurement; Christy and Jess weigh in credibly.
  • “Give it to them in centimeters.” – Tom Griswold (110:05)
  • “Everybody likes a foot long, but all you need is a 6 inch with extra meat.” – Josh Arnold (111:00)

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11. Silly Inventions & Odd News (147:23 – 149:54)

• Guy Arrested 98 Times: Washington State man with a custom-built car dashboard bong, leading police on a chase.
  • “He was charged with DUI, eluding police and possession of narcotics. Yes, he could smoke his bong while driving.” – Christy Lee (147:47)
• Bear Suit Scarecrows: Indian farmers don bear costumes to frighten away crop-raiding monkeys; everyone riffs on bear costumes and farming hacks.

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12. Listener Letters and Reaction (Throughout)

• Names for “the Male Member”: “She calls it Snickers because it satisfies.” (35:53)
• Odd Text Autocorrects & Domestic Lingo: “I’m going to get a carrot naked” becomes a running gag (36:30).

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13. Live Events, Merch, Charity & Wrap-Up (Throughout)

• Pop-Up Shop: Reminders to buy limited edition shirts — benefiting Brave Gowns kids’ charity, shop closes Sunday night.
• Stand-Up Promos: Pat Godwin subs for Josh at the Ritz Theatre, Tiffin, OH; shout-outs to Mark Shalafu, Greg Warren, Willie G, Tim and Johnny Kavanaugh, and others touring live.

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• On Ejaculation Health:
  • “Every husband in America is going to be using this tonight. Honey, do you want me to die?” – Tom Griswold (79:51)
• On Odd Towns:
  • “Ding Dong Texas... Dick Shooter, Idaho... Knockem Stiff Ohio... Wankers Corner, Oregon... All on the same road, apparently.” – Christy Lee & crew (54:47)
• On Penis Sizes:
  • “When you measure, where do you start?” – Tom Griswold (108:33)
  • “She said, oh, well you aren’t supposed to start measuring at your b-hole.” – Ace Cosby (108:48)
• On Arms Race to the Moon:
  • “...build a base on the moon’s south pole...Meanwhile, the chickpeas were coated with a fungi to help reduce the uptake of heavy metals. Sounds like a wonderful thing to eat.” – Tom & Christy (90:28)
• On Emotional Connection:
  • “...emotional connection, chemistry and compatibility matter more in bed than penis size. Well, of course, that would make sense.” – Christy Lee (111:19)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• 01:27 - Harry Caray "Bible Baseball" bit starts
• 03:30 - “Mirac’ go like that since fishes and loaves night.” (Parody peak)
• 08:15 - Introduction of the day's sexual science/space themes
• 13:28–14:13 - Odd town names and setup for semen stories
• 19:14–20:54 - Heywood Banks’ “Famous Dead Guys”
• 39:47 - March Madness updates and sports pool banter
• 49:18–54:47 - Weird town names and global comparisons
• 62:03–63:36 - Pat Godwin’s small-town musical number
• 79:06–84:24 - Semen health and sperm science begins
• 101:06–104:23 - Abstinence and sperm quality
• 108:02–113:17 - Penis surveys and size rankings
• 129:13–134:13 - American food oddities

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Tone & Style

• The show is irreverent, quick-witted, often R-rated, but always grounded in the easy, familiar chemistry of the cast. Lovable puns, playful innuendo, cross-talk, mock outrage, callback running gags, and bursts of laughter drive the comedic engine. Music/comedy blends seamlessly throughout, and the frequent letters/interaction keep it listener-centered.

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Summary for New Listeners

This episode is classic Bob & Tom: a rich, rapid blend of comedy, pop culture, saucy science talk, listener engagement, and musicality. Best consumed with room to laugh and a willingness to learn why there is a place called Dick Shooter, Idaho. Don’t miss the parody “Bible Baseball” and Godwin’s city-name road song, but also settle in for the ribald humor that is this show’s signature.

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End Summary

Transcript

[Tom Griswold]

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[Christy Lee]

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[Tom Griswold]

It's the Bob and Tom Show. Dan St. Paul is our guest. Now, we were talking about the fact that you're from San Francisco and you and you live there with your wife and your son.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And you're a sports fan. And particularly I know you're a baseball fan.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

And a big Harry Carey fan.

[Jeff Oskay]

Yes. Oh, I love Harry Carey. I have to tell you, though, we have a female announcer at the ballpark in San Francisco.

[Tom Griswold]

That's right.

[Jeff Oskay]

Sherry Davis. I went to the game before the strike last year and it's very strange because she sounds like the phone company lady. It's weird. It's like the third baseman is number nine, Matt Williams. Please make a note of. And then, and then if there's a pinch hitter, it's the batter. Number 10, Royce Clayton has been changed. You know, I'm an old school guy.

[Tom Griswold]

I can't handle this. You like the male announcers.

[Jeff Oskay]

Big Harry Carey fan.

[Pat Godwin]

I love that.

[Jeff Oskay]

You know, I love Harry Carey and I love. And I, and I just, you know, Harry, of course, did the first baseball game ever played. You guys are aware of that?

[Tom Griswold]

Sure. Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

He was the only guy around at that time to do that game. And it was wonderful. I got an old tape of it and I listened to it all the time. Hello, fans, this is Harry Carey. Welcome to today's game between the Bethlehem Braves and the Jerusalem Giants. Kind of a sparse crowd here today as a plague of locusts has made it tough to get out to the ballpark. You can hear the vendors, though. Hey, manna, get your manna who wants bread from heaven? It's hot. It's fresh. It just fell hot.

[Jess Hooker]

Manna.

[Jeff Oskay]

Here. Penance. Penance. Our Fathers Hail Marys can't get absolution without an act of contrition. Who wants a rosary?

[Tom Griswold]

Here.

[Josh Arnold]

Water.

[Christy Lee]

Water.

[Tom Griswold]

Uh oh.

[Jeff Oskay]

Wine. Who wants wine? Now Peter looks into Jesus for the. Jesus gives him the sign. Holy cow. Peter denies it. He gives it to him again. He denies it again.

[Tom Griswold]

Once more.

[Jeff Oskay]

That's three times. And Jesus is out to give Peter a sermon on the mound. Jesus. Of course, the big hero in yesterday's game came up in the bottom of the ninth with the Braves down three to nothing and hit a basis empty grand slam. Fans, we haven't had a Mirac go like that since we had fishes and loaves night here. I had a chance to talk with the Savior after the game and this is what he had to say. Well, Harry, the ball was on the outside part of the diagram. I was not trying to make contact. First of all, I want to thank my father for loading the bases and the Holy Ghost for breaking up the double play. Back to live action. Lazarus up to the plate now. Oh, I'm sorry.

[Christy Lee]

Lazarus up to the plate.

[Jeff Oskay]

Here's the pitch. Oh no, he's hit. He's hurt. He's down.

[Christy Lee]

Holy cow.

[Jeff Oskay]

He's dead. But wait a minute, he gets back up. That's the sixth time this week that kid can take one for the team. Abraham up to the plate now, probably up here to sacrifice. Enfield drawn in for the patriarch. And now there's some action in the Bethlehem bullpen. I can't quite make out the of his rope. It is the big number 10. Moses just called up from the burning bush lid, already gaining a reputation for that lightning fast pickoff move reminding those runners that thou shalt not stand up. Let's give it over to Steve Stone. Thank you, Harry. Fans, you want to be here this Tuesday night when the Braves meet the Calvary Cubs. It's going to be Nabisco Communion Wafer day here at the ballpark. All fans 33 and under get a free Eucharist signed by the Sabres. You know, fans, Nabisco Communion wafers go down smooth, won't stick to the roof of your mouth like those cheap imitation sacraments. Sure, they cost a little more, but when it comes to your eternal salvation, isn't it worth that extra buck in the collection plate? Remember, fans, the next time you go to the rail for that body and blood, ask for the host with a mouse. Ask for Nabisco. Thanks, Steve. Here's some scores now from around the league. A big upset. David 1 Goliath. Nothing ends a long win streak for the big guy.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, no.

[Jeff Oskay]

Job is on the 15 day disabled list with a bad case of leprosy. Pulled a hamstring. Pulled it right off. The Angels have sent Lucifer down. That's a shame. When that fella was in his prime, he could throw some heat. This year his earned run average has ballooned to a hefty six, six, six. And here's a partial score. Sodom and Gomorrah still tied at 69.

[Tom Griswold]

That's how it's done.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey, how the heck are you? We're doing fine. Hope you are too.

[Jeff Oskay]

Bob and Tom.

[Josh Arnold]

It is the Bob and Tom show live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. There's Christy Lee at the news desk.

[Christy Lee]

Hey, Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

Pat Godwin's there.

[Pat Godwin]

Hey, Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

Jeff [e-mail] sports desk.

[Ace Cosby]

That's right.

[Josh Arnold]

Ace Cosby across the way. Hello, I am Josh Arnold. And there he is, Commissioner of baseball.

[Tom Griswold]

What?

[Josh Arnold]

And all of our hearts, Tom Griswold.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, thank you very much, Josh. It's good to see you back in. In gear. Are you feeling okay today?

[Josh Arnold]

Doing. It's a long road.

[Tom Griswold]

I see.

[Ace Cosby]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Once again, you got this, buddy.

[Tom Griswold]

Josh is dealing with something called diverticulitis and limiting your diet to. Are you still just the bone broth and.

[Josh Arnold]

No, no. I can have. It's still very limited but like I'm having a turkey sandwich this morning. Oh. But I can only have sourdough or gluten free right now while they try to get things calm down.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, that's great. Can you put anything on it?

[Josh Arnold]

I don't. I'm not. Just because I don't.

[Tom Griswold]

Hot sauce?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, sorry.

[Josh Arnold]

No, they have me on something called low fodmap right now which is very. It has something to do with the way sugars ferment in your digestive system.

[Tom Griswold]

And so this sounds very complicated and scientific.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, dude, I'm learning a lot.

[Tom Griswold]

Speaking of science coming up today we have an entire hunk about. About semen and I mean the sperm type, not, not the. Not the ahoy type, not the naval. Yes, yes. Fascinating stories involving outer space and research about one of the ejaculation in space. In space.

[Josh Arnold]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

It. I don't know how these all sort of coalesced.

[Josh Arnold]

Have one of the astronauts finally admitted to it? They masturbated?

[Tom Griswold]

Not that I know of. This is all based on scientific speculation and we have NASA moon base proposal. Some other really interesting stuff going on. We had a great time in Cincinnati yesterday. To be more specific, we were in Kentucky, but we had a really wonderful time. And thanks everybody who came. And we still have those shirts up on our website. It's a special donation project that we're doing for a thing called Brave Gowns, which they make like little superhero capes and stuff for kids in the hospital. Fun, fun little organization. If you get a chance, you can make a donation actually by going to the Bob and Tom website or just you can buy one of the shirts where. That's where we're going to give the money to the Brave Gowns folks. But we certainly had a nice time. So thanks to everybody, everybody who helped out, and I hope to do it again. The Reds did not win, by the way.

[Ace Cosby]

Oh, no, they lost three zip, three to zero.

[Josh Arnold]

Shut up.

[Ace Cosby]

There's always on the opening day.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, they've got more than 100 games to go, so we certainly wish. Thanks to everybody at Smoke justice can't win them all and Covington, Kentucky, and our friends at 92.5 the Fox. We're celebrating 30 years on the station there. So that was fun. I do have a letter. I mentioned the T shirts. We did these sort of special T shirts in honor of opening day. And the little secret in the T shirt was I had. I had put the. The coordinates, the latitude and longitude of more or less home plate at Great American Ballpark. Got a letter a few days ago saying some guy tried to turn out to be a bar near Great American. I'm not sure if there's some dispute, but I've got another letter now that says I was a little closer than that. This guy did it on several different forms. Formats. Took the latitude and longitude listed on the shirt. He said, don't sell yourself short, Tom. I've entered the coordinates on the T shirt into multiple mapping tools. Determine the point is more or less the entrance of Great American Ballpark, not a random bar. Either way, it's pretty funny.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

If you, if you use that to find the ballpark, you're going to be close. You might be at a bar nearby.

[Christy Lee]

Well, that doesn't. That's not a bad thing.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. So. And I think I got the altitude right, but it's. It's written. The elevation. I should say it's written right there on the shirt. Just. Just for fun. This is Graham. Thank you. From the sunny shores of Erie, Pennsylvania. We certainly appreciate your taking the time and trouble to write us. We have also Been talking a lot about music to. To either enter a room by the. The so called walk up music. And I've got a. This is a suggestion I am not familiar with, although I do know about this band because one of our comedian guests has a son who is in this band, interestingly enough, and it's called Avenged Sevenfold.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, they're cool.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. You like those guys?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And he suggests this. This should be my walk up music.

[Christy Lee]

That's a good one.

[Tom Griswold]

What this one is. He said it's. It's called Hail to the King. I think it's gonna kick in any second. There we go. Maybe start it right there. What do you think? Too slow?

[Josh Arnold]

No, no. If you've got a long intro, this is a.

[Tom Griswold]

Am I coming from the. From downstairs, getting in the elevator.

[Pat Godwin]

And you're just leaving the hotel.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, here we go now. Yeah, this is good right here. Yeah. Okay. Very good. Thank you very much. Well, thanks for. For thinking of me in Clueston, Florida. You ever heard of Clueston?

[Christy Lee]

I have not.

[Josh Arnold]

I haven't got a clue as to

[Tom Griswold]

where Danny calls it America's sweetest town.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, is that.

[Christy Lee]

Actually, I do know where that is. It's. I think I could be wrong, but I think it's near the Everglades. It's outside. It's like in the middle of the state. I have been there. Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, we have a whole list today of town names, both in North America and elsewhere that are very unusual. A couple really, really odd ones that we'll be getting to at some point this morning. Do you want to just give me one of them, Christy?

[Christy Lee]

Sure I can.

[Tom Griswold]

There's some that are kind of famous. Like French Lick is one of the ones you hear all the time. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Wanker's Corner is in Oregon.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Wonder what they do there.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, it must have been a guy named Wanker. You would think that's in. In. Of course, in England, Wanker's Corner would be slippery. Yeah, Yeah. A whole different thing.

[Christy Lee]

There's a hooker. Oklahoma.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. What else?

[Christy Lee]

There's Dick Shooter, Idaho.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. That will lead. Can you save Dick Shooter for our. Our hunk about the male seed?

[Josh Arnold]

You think Dick Shooter, Idaho is named after an angry lady?

[Tom Griswold]

All that is is coming up here in the Bob and Tom program right now. I want to talk to you about your credit cards. Yikes. You got that right now, what is it? How many days away are we from getting your taxes in? Hope you get a refund, but maybe you can take that refund and pay off those credit cards, maybe not. And this is where the interest rate on credit cards, if you've ever checked it, if you've got, if you owe them a bunch of money, you'll notice it's over 20% in many cases. So it really can be, it can really hold you down there. American Financing has an interesting idea. If you own your house, if you own your home, the way things have been going in the last few years, your home is probably worth a lot more than when you bought it. So there may be a lot of equity in that house you've got so you can refinance the thing, take that money and pay off those credit cards that you're paying that huge interest rate on and move forward. The folks at American Financing have sent me just some average numbers. They say some of the folks they're working with right now, it's about an average savings of 800 bucks a month. And they've got a special thing going on for the next week or two in which you could possibly delay two mortgage payments. So find out how this works. If it works for you. If you own your home, it might be a great way to get, get your head above water. It's called American Financing. You'll find them@american financing.net bobandtom that's american financing.net tell them the Bob and Tom show sent you NMLS 182334 nmlsconsumeraccess.org APR for rates in the 5 start at 6.196%. For well qualified borrowers, call 866-889-2611. Credit costs and terms, visit americanfinancing.net bobandtom did you know? Fast Growing Trees is America's largest and most trusted online nursery with thousands of trees and plants and over 2 million happy customers. They have all the plants your yard or home needs, including fruit trees, privacy trees, shrubs and houseplants, all grown with care and guaranteed to arrive healthy.

[Josh Arnold]

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[Christy Lee]

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[Tom Griswold]

Right now they have great deals on spring planting essentials, up to half off on select plants. And you can get 20% off your first purchase when using the code Tom at checkout. That's an additional 20% off. Better plants and better growing. @fastgrowingtrees.com just use the code Tom at checkout. Offer is valid for a limited time. Terms and conditions may apply tomorrow.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey, it's the Bob and Tom Show. Thank you for being here with us. We're live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Christy Lee's at the news desk.

[Christy Lee]

Hi.

[Josh Arnold]

Pat Godwin's over there.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello.

[Josh Arnold]

theorangeinsouls.com sports desk, it's Jeff Oskay.

[Ace Cosby]

That's right. You were missed yesterday, Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

Thank you. I sure missed all of you and everybody that was there. I would have have much rather have been there. There's Ace Cosby. Hello, I am Josh Arnold. And there's Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much, Josh. Once again, we had a great time.

[Josh Arnold]

Good.

[Tom Griswold]

Yesterday, Covington, Kentucky, usa, a place called Smoke justice had a letter about it. Oh, what do you got?

[Christy Lee]

This is from Greg, yesterday's show, one of my favorites in over 20 years, although I have to admit, I've enjoyed most of them. Well, thank you, Greg.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, well, I certainly appreciate that. Thanks again to Lee's famous recipe, chicken Tasty. Be a nice breakfast this morning, wouldn't you think? Now we have lots to get to, but of course, we always want to get to your letters. And we're going to begin with a retirement request. And our letter is brought to you by Christy Lee's vehicle.

[Christy Lee]

That's right. Get into the Hyundai getaway sales event and get away with the deal. So right. It almost feels wrong. Visit HyundaiUSA.com for details.

[Tom Griswold]

Thanks very much. I've got a unusual request here that we can't do.

[Christy Lee]

So why'd you bring it up?

[Tom Griswold]

So I'm gonna make a slight adjustment. Well, it's a song that we're not allowed to play anymore. Apparently it affects it apparently was offending the sensibilities of some people. So what we're gonna do is I'm gonna do a an audible, if you will. Just a slightly one. This is going out to Craig in a place called Simpsonville, South Carolina. Simpson, eh, do Mr. Burns retiring today.

[Christy Lee]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

So I'm gonna do an audible here. Craig, I'm gonna play something from your favorite artist, not the one you suggested, oddly enough. Typically the songs we can't play are the ones that we've written funny enough. But this is, this is from Haywood Banks. This is one of my favorites from Heywood. It's a short song, but happy retirement, Craig. And pay close attention to the lyrics. I am older than a lot of famous dead guys. Lot of famous dead guys didn't live as long as me.

[Andre Berto]

Oh, sure, they accomplish more in a

[Christy Lee]

lot less time

[Andre Berto]

but they are dead and what good does that do you.

[Tom Griswold]

Now if I become real famous and they know me round the world. When I croak everyone can say sure didn't do as much as some other dead guys

[Andre Berto]

Body had more time to do it in.

[Tom Griswold]

La la la la la la la

[Andre Berto]

la la la la la la la

[Tom Griswold]

la la la la la la. Heywood. All right. That song always reminds me of a classic drawing in the New Yorker. It shows the guy from the back and he's reading the obituaries and it'll say the headlines are 15 years older than you, 12 years older than you, 10 years younger than you. Exactly your age. Good luck with your retirement, Greg. Thank you for the request.

[Ace Cosby]

Are we allowed to guess what song allowed to play?

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, I know.

[Tom Griswold]

No. So it would be.

[Pat Godwin]

I know.

[Tom Griswold]

Exactly. Yeah. It's a long story. It's ridiculous. But we'll, we'll move forward here. I wanted to mention a couple things. We had some great guests yesterday, including Mark Shalafu. It was great. He's going to be at the Liberty Funny Bone this weekend, tonight and tomorrow. While I'm at it, Willie G. Tonight at the Starved Rock Lodge in Oglesby, Illinois, Pat Godwin. Pat Godwin, Jeff Oskay and Kostakiakanamopoulos doing a special show at the Ritz Theater in Tiffin, Ohio. And then Nick Griffin, great comedian. He's at Comedy Off Broadway in Lexington this weekend. And lastly, the Kavanaugh Brothers. Tim Kavanaugh with a C and Johnny Kavanaugh with a K. Not related by chance, but they're in the Mason City. I should say Mason City, Illinois, at Mason City Limits Comedy Club. How about that? And Jim Brewer, who, by the way, was on our show the other day. He is going to be in Detroit tonight, Indy tomorrow. So a lot of great comedy happening this weekend. Get your mind off your troubles. I will say one more thing. Greg Warren is getting ready for a huge show in Springfield, Missouri. I believe they're putting up the statue of Greg as you enter the city.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, that's nice.

[Tom Griswold]

Greg Warren, born here, Springfield, Missouri. And to celebrate, he's going to do A show. It'll be a great one. It's Galois. Is that right? I keep the Galois Theater.

[Josh Arnold]

Can't wait till that Show's over.

[Tom Griswold]

Saturday, April 11th. Every time. Wow. A little testy today, are we?

[Josh Arnold]

Greg is also told you it's Galois five times.

[Tom Griswold]

I've got to write a pronouncer on this. I want.

[Josh Arnold]

You sure do.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I just want to say Gilois.

[Ace Cosby]

Get it up.

[Josh Arnold]

It does have that for you.

[Tom Griswold]

It's got this. Anyway, it's Galois. He'll be there once again, April 11, Saturday night. That's gonna be a killer show. Go see him. And he's also on the greatest average American show with our buddy Nate Bargazzi. You can check that out on Hulu. And it's on Wednesdays in abc. So let's move forward here. Christy.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Our letters once again, brought to you by our friends at Hyundai.

[Christy Lee]

They sure are.

[Tom Griswold]

You got one?

[Christy Lee]

I don't. Do you have one?

[Tom Griswold]

I got a bunch of them here. I guess I mentioned this on the year and as usual, received a lot of pushback about when I was a kid, we. I want to say it was either seventh or eighth grade. We went to Washington, D.C. yes. And lots of schools. It depends on obviously where you. Where you are geographically. But I'd mentioned that my daughter went to Chicago the other day on a trip with her school trip. Went to some great places. And what was the highlight? The bus ride there and back. Hanging out with her friends. That's cool.

[Christy Lee]

I went to Wright Patterson. I remember that bus ride. It was a lot of fun.

[Ace Cosby]

But what did you get filled up?

[Christy Lee]

Not quite. I remember I was in high school, by the way. I think I was a sophomore.

[Tom Griswold]

But another one, we did this bus ride and. God, one of the. One of the really good athletes, probably the best athlete at our school, was terrified of going over bridges.

[Christy Lee]

What?

[Tom Griswold]

He'd be kind of cowering. And I have a touch of that. You really?

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, absolutely. Yeah. I know other people. That it? Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

So you must have had a great time crossing the Ohio River.

[Pat Godwin]

I didn't care for it.

[Ace Cosby]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

No. Were you in the. Were you in the Uber that went back and forth?

[Pat Godwin]

No, I didn't get there in time.

[Tom Griswold]

You had the stoned Uber driver.

[Ace Cosby]

We did. Josh. We got. A few of us went out to dinner and we got an Uber back to the hotel. And when we, like, got in the Uber, it reeked of weed.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah.

[Ace Cosby]

The guy, his eyes were barely open. And we start going over a bridge and then we come back across the bridge and then we go back over the bridge. And I'm like, in the bridge. We want over there. And he's like, yeah. And I was like, oh, this is like. It took us 25 minutes to get back to our hotel. It should have taken five minutes.

[Tom Griswold]

In his defense, sober, I have. If you. There's a certain part of Cincinnati when you're coming from the north, there is a hunk of Freeway, it's 12 lanes wide or something, and you've got a series of signs that are a few hundred yards apart. And if you are in the wrong place, you gotta. You gotta exit right, then exit left.

[Christy Lee]

And geographically you want to go south, but it tells you to go north on 71. And that seems wrong.

[Tom Griswold]

Yep.

[Christy Lee]

So it's like, I don't want to go that way.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, Yeah. I have absolutely done at least a triple crossing trying to get to our gigs there.

[Ace Cosby]

Yeah, but you aren't a rideshare driver in that town.

[Tom Griswold]

In any event. Back to my story. So I had mentioned that my Washington trip as a kid, which is. That also led to my famous story about my buddy John getting.

[Andre Berto]

Getting.

[Tom Griswold]

Getting. Getting the. The magazine.

[Christy Lee]

What. What is the letter about?

[Tom Griswold]

Remember I said we went

[Ace Cosby]

to.

[Tom Griswold]

We went to FBI headquarters and they shot off a machine gun. They shot off a tommy gun. You guys all poo pooed it?

[Ace Cosby]

No, no one poo pooed it.

[Jess Hooker]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

We believed Dear Bob and Tom show. I did the DC trip too. I can confirm we saw an FBI agent firing a Tommy gun. Listening on Y103 in Youngstown. Thank you, Dave.

[Josh Arnold]

What year?

[Tom Griswold]

God, I don't know. It was a while back. Well, Ace, first of all, the tommy gun was associated with mobster mobs. Yeah. With. And with a particularly fairly awful television show of a certain era. I. I wonder if they still do that now.

[Ace Cosby]

They shoot off an AK47.

[Pat Godwin]

Advanced version of Atomic.

[Josh Arnold]

I'd love to see somebody shoot a tommy gun. Right. Because it would be like an old.

[Christy Lee]

I don't even know what a tommy gun.

[Tom Griswold]

It has the. It has the round. Imagine if someone had a rifle, but it looks like when you look at it from the front, like there's a Frisbee, there's a round cartridge. Cartridge.

[Christy Lee]

It has that thing that goes in like. It goes.

[Josh Arnold]

Not that well. No, no, not really.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Ace Cosby]

It's like a round. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, there we go. Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Old. Old Jimmy Cagney would use Valentine's Day Massacre.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Oh, it's. It's. Isn't that the gun featured in Home Alone. Yeah, yeah, I gotcha with that fantasy sequence with that. Okay.

[Pat Godwin]

The Some Like It Hot gangsters. The beginning of that movie.

[Josh Arnold]

Right, right, right.

[Tom Griswold]

So. But yeah, that was really. I remember. But my. I guess my larger point was I remembered, you know, the Lincoln Memorial and the FBI and the Smithsonian, but my daughter was more impressive.

[Ace Cosby]

Right, but you went to an all boys school. What else are you going to do on the bus?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, you're not going to be doing

[Christy Lee]

anything fun on your bus.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, one guy barfed out the window and it flew in three windows back.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, man.

[Tom Griswold]

Hitting my buddy Rich Lulinsky in the face, that is. Yeah, that'll happen. Oh, well. But the Washington trip also was where one of my. One of my friends at the time looked like he was 18. He went down to the lobby and he bought a copy of Western Nudist. And by the way, I want to thank the listeners. Some. Someone actually found me, found me that issue and sent. It's in my office somewhere. But Western Nudist was really. Because in those days you couldn't just grab your phone to get a little bit of flesh.

[Christy Lee]

Josh, you would have loved it in front of a live audience. His references, he would go. Nobody. Nobody got his references yesterday. Not one person.

[Pat Godwin]

Wild ones, too.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, it was like when they're just looking at them.

[Tom Griswold]

They were drunk.

[Christy Lee]

What are you talking about?

[Tom Griswold]

There were a couple of them. Might have been a couple of obscure ones, but yeah. Yeah, Western Nudist was about some nudist colony and it's very disturbing when you see like the whole family naked.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

That's got to be an awkward conversation. So. Yeah. In the seventh grade now, Susie.

[Christy Lee]

All right,

[Tom Griswold]

then of course there's that great song we used to sing, Western Nudists. Okay. Sorry, Christy, you still don't have any letters, so I guess I'm stuck with all of them. A lot of suggestions for walk up music. We'll have to spend the weekend sorting these out. Oh, also a correction. We had a letter a couple days ago about the Hokey Pokey being played in the locker room by Hayden Fry. Hayden Fry was the Iowa Hawkeyes football coach.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

I got a nice letter from Dan explaining also from. From Iowa that I. I don't remember the letter except the. But the fun part was he would, you know, to build up camaraderie, they would get these big football players all padded up doing the Hokey Pokey after a game in the locker room. So one of the great coaches of all time in the, in the. A legend in the World of college football. Doing. Doing the hokey pokey. Thank you very much. Now, what's coming up in the news, Christy?

[Christy Lee]

Coming up, we have a lot of ejaculation news, ladies and gentlemen, and a lot of it has to do with astronauts.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, it's weird.

[Christy Lee]

Very interesting. And a lot of airline news, too. Big news out of United. And this is good. If you have a small family. A small.

[Tom Griswold]

And if you're a family with small children, and conversely, if you're. If you're a very large person, Southwest

[Christy Lee]

may be taxing you.

[Josh Arnold]

I knew it. I. I called this. Yeah, 2015, 20 years ago.

[Ace Cosby]

You're a soothsayer.

[Tom Griswold]

Yep.

[Josh Arnold]

Yep.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, wait till you hear the.

[Pat Godwin]

What's happening.

[Tom Griswold]

What they're doing there. Let's see what was there? There was one other thing. Oh, there's also a thing about. I don't know if I gave it to you. About the ability for humankind to reproduce in outer space.

[Christy Lee]

I do have that. Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, there may be some hurdles.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I would think so.

[Tom Griswold]

Other than getting. Getting the male member to clear a 4 inch thick spacesuit. It's coming.

[Josh Arnold]

Wait a minute.

[Tom Griswold]

We'll find out about sex in space.

[Ace Cosby]

You were talking college football, Indiana's coach, yesterday. It was spring training and there were some issues.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, really?

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, we'll find out. We'll find out about that. Oh, and we also have, if you are a fan of Baja Blast. Yes, there's an. There's something interesting about this story involving the number 420. And it's something approved by Major League Baseball right now. How are your knees? They hurtin'? Maybe your hips are hurting, your back is hurting. Well, maybe it's. Who's responsible? Could be your feet. Josh, tell me more.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, you might just say, you know what? I'm getting older. These pains and aches, they're gonna be, I guess, around for the rest of my time. And they're normal. Well, not necessarily. Feet get tired. That means arches collapse, heels ache, knees complain, and lower backs tighten up. It very well could be your foundation. OrangeInsoles.com is the place to go. Orange insoles deliver rigid arch support that do not collapse by lunchtime, with a deep heel cup that cradle your heels and absorbs. They absorb shock naturally. They help maintain alignment as your feet and legs fatigue, reducing all that stress on your knees, hips, and lower back. They're durable enough for work boots. They're comfortable enough for everyday wear. So maybe you work on concrete all day. Maybe you're a server or a teacher or a doctor or a nurse. If you're on your feet all day or if you're just somebody who does a lot of walking, you should check out Orange Insoles. They've upgraded a great deal on their website. Visit orangeinsouls.com, order more and save with Orange Insoles Bundle packs. That's right. And be sure to use promo code bobandtom at checkout to receive $5 off your total order plus free shipping in the USA. So you have nothing to lose here. Orange and souls.com promo code Bob and Tom. Give them a shot. They may just help you out a lot.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm sure they will. I'm a big fan. By the way, if you had your bracket busted, and you probably did, Orange Insoles has not given up. There's hope you could win a new 4K TV. Check out bobandtom.com contest coming up, a world record involving Philadelphia. Pat Godwin.

[Jeff Oskay]

Really?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Your old hometown. We have a base on the moon and lots of weird sperm news. And if you're from a town with a weird name, we've got some ones that may even be out weirding you. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Andre Berto]

Thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom show this morning. Catch any part of the show you missed later today on our YouTube channel? Uh, are you stuck staring at your W2? Are tax refund worries holding you back?

[Tom Griswold]

You probably have FOMO, the fear of messing up the fix.

[Andre Berto]

Using TurboTax on Intuit credit Karma. They find every credit and deduction to

[Tom Griswold]

help you get every refund dollar you deserve or your money back. It's time to overcome your fear of messing up and get your taxes done right.

[Andre Berto]

Start filing today in the credit karma app.

[Tom Griswold]

Q95 radio.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey, it's the Bob and Tom show live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Christy Lee's at the news desk.

[Christy Lee]

Hi.

[Josh Arnold]

Pat Godwin's across there. Hello across there. There's Jeff oskay@the orangeinsouls.com sports desk. There's Ace Cosby. I'm Josh Arnold. There's Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much, Josh. Glad to have you back. Now, we've been talking about so many different things. I've got another letter here. This is referencing the. The names of the male member.

[Josh Arnold]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

Sometimes we were talking about slang terms for the male member, of course, but also nicknames. Also nicknames. This is a on that topic, it comes to us from the beautiful city of Ithaca, New York.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah. Love Ithaca. Yeah, Where Cornell is.

[Tom Griswold]

Yep.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. What a beautiful campus.

[Tom Griswold]

And the. All the beautiful gorges. They have a great museum, lakes, and, of course, the resident. Larry, for those of you that know. Larry.

[Christy Lee]

Hi, Larry.

[Tom Griswold]

Larry in Ithaca. Larry. Larry wanted to tell us what his wife. The term that she uses to refer to the. To the male. Yes, yes, yes. She calls it Snickers because it satisfies. Thank you very much. And coming up, I think we have some. Some Milky Way and Mars trivia that ties right in with that. Well, thank you very much. Thank you very much, Larry. We certainly appreciate that. I'm not sure I get this letter.

[Christy Lee]

Okay, go ahead.

[Tom Griswold]

My son, Blake. This is from Joan, sent me a text the other day before leaving for work that said, when I get home, I'm going to get a carrot naked. Do you want any? What does that mean?

[Josh Arnold]

Is that. Is that all the letter says?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

A carrot naked.

[Josh Arnold]

It sounds to me like an autocorrect issue.

[Tom Griswold]

Then she goes, do you mean peel a carrot? I. I don't know. What.

[Christy Lee]

I have no idea.

[Josh Arnold]

So it's. This is Tom speak. Instead of saying, I'm gonna peel a carrot, he said, I'm gonna get a carrot.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, that's what it is. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Okay. So he just had a. Oh, so this isn't sexual.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, see, I thought.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, I didn't think so, knowing that it was her son.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, I didn't hear the son part.

[Tom Griswold]

Hang on one second. I was thinking. Feeling a carrot. Simpler to. Never mind.

[Josh Arnold]

One of those.

[Pat Godwin]

Thomas.

[Tom Griswold]

Sorry, Joan. Okay. For God's sake, didn't she say context?

[Josh Arnold]

My son texted me.

[Tom Griswold]

Let's get back to this one. Dear Bob and Tom show, this comes to us from Greg. I was fixing spaghetti the night my wife said, do we have any spaghetti bread? I said, do you mean garlic bread? Yeah, that's what she meant. That's. That's. That's. That's the topic.

[Christy Lee]

Apparently, spaghetti bread's better than the spaghetti. Don't you like to put sauce on your garlic bread?

[Josh Arnold]

I'll dip it every now and again.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, you can't beat spaghetti now. Dear Bob and Tom show. I'm catching up. A few days ago, why was Tom having Austin at the Lowe's cut the wood for him for the doghouse? Because he's such an experienced woodworker. Oh, that's. That's very simple, Austin.

[Christy Lee]

That's a very good question.

[Tom Griswold]

Because fitting it in my car, you see, was going to be the issue.

[Christy Lee]

Mike, do you have a saw at home? Like one of those? Like. Yeah, a table Saw?

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, I used to have a table saw. I don't have it anymore.

[Josh Arnold]

But you have a circular saw.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah. Skill saw, whatever. But yeah, it was a matter of getting it into the. If I'd had a pickup truck, it wouldn't have been a problem because my daughter, of course, immediately walked over to the four foot by four foot hunks of plywood. Let's take these, Daddy.

[Christy Lee]

So how's that doghouse doing now?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, it's doing great.

[Christy Lee]

Did you paint it yet?

[Tom Griswold]

No, they don't want to paint it. Haven't you heard?

[Christy Lee]

No, I didn't hear that.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Yeah. This weekend, depending on the weather, we'll see if we can. I still want to put a roof on it, and there is a roof, but I want to put a.

[Christy Lee]

Is it out in the backyard yet?

[Tom Griswold]

No.

[Ace Cosby]

How does the dog like it? Does he sleep in it?

[Tom Griswold]

No, it doesn't sleep in. It just goes out there and sits in it. If you give him a treat, it's just.

[Josh Arnold]

You throw a treat in the house? Yes,

[Tom Griswold]

I have some really good. I've got a. A friend that makes these beautiful dried liver. I brought some for you. Yeah, they're good dried liver dog treats. Oh, yeah. You throw in there, he'll go right in. They'll just sit down and look around.

[Christy Lee]

So the doghouse, I guarantee, is in the garage, correct?

[Tom Griswold]

It's inside right now? Yeah, yeah, it's in my house right now. This weekend we'll go to the next level.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

That's why I didn't. I. I didn't cut it at home, you see. Okay, well, we can move forward here. Now let's check in with the sports page. The orange Insoles sports desk occupied today by Jeff Oscar, Christy Lee. You mentioned one of the games last evening. What else is happening?

[Ace Cosby]

Oh, well, she was talking Purdue. Purdue did. They won last night with 1.7 seconds left. Trey Kaufman Wren tipped in a miss by Braden Smith as they edged out the 11th seated loghorn 79 to 77.

[Christy Lee]

Closer than we all in the anticipated or wanted.

[Ace Cosby]

But yeah, they said he was mobbed by teammates right after the final buzzer sounded at the SAP center.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Hammer down.

[Ace Cosby]

Oh, yeah. And it looks like. Who is this? Yeah, Illinois muscles to eliminate last year's national runner up from the NCAA tournament, beating Houston 55. Yeah. Who cares?

[Christy Lee]

No, Illinois. They beat Houston handedly.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, no, I think you're missing.

[Ace Cosby]

This is the important.

[Tom Griswold]

You're missing the larger point that what is Christy and I go to the gym that we go to they do a pool.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Where you just. You pick a team out of a hat. Last year, my then nine year old daughter Heart won a thousand dollars. She has Illinois.

[Christy Lee]

I have Illinois in the final four of my bracket. I don't know that they'll make it to the final game, but you never know.

[Tom Griswold]

Is hard.

[Josh Arnold]

A member of the gym.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Wow.

[Ace Cosby]

Nice.

[Josh Arnold]

Because I was gonna say you should have to be a member.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Oh, no, no. Yeah. She is okay.

[Christy Lee]

Do they have a class for kids?

[Josh Arnold]

It's all in the up and up.

[Tom Griswold]

She works out there all the time. A couple days a week.

[Christy Lee]

What?

[Tom Griswold]

We're a healthy family.

[Josh Arnold]

That's great.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Ace Cosby]

Yesterday was spring training at iu. Coach Signetti, they won. Last year. They won the national championship. During the run, he was became known for his demanding coaching style. Indiana open spring practice Thursday. And incoming transfer wide receiver Nick Marsh got a crash course and what it means to play for the coach. Marsh, who transferred from Michigan, arrived to practice in gold cleats.

[Christy Lee]

Oh.

[Ace Cosby]

After Marsh's productive two year stint in East Lansing, Signetti pivoted to the wide receivers footwear. I don't love those gold shoes he came out in today. He said he learned what getting your ass ripped is all about. I don't know if that happened to him very often at Michigan State. That was before the practice even started.

[Christy Lee]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

All right.

[Christy Lee]

His way or no way. I got it.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Okay.

[Ace Cosby]

And Mountain Dew is giving away free Baja Blast for every home run that travels 420ft or more.

[Christy Lee]

420ft? Feet is that.

[Tom Griswold]

But do you think they chose 420?

[Josh Arnold]

Yes. That's. That's very deliberate.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Ace Cosby]

As the official soft drink of the 2026 Major League Baseball season, the new promotion began this week with the first major league game of the season. Fans can Visit Baja blast home runs.com to sign up for the deal and add the monster, the Mountain Dew Baja Blast to their mobile wallet so that when the qualifying homer is hitting during a game, they can use the pass later that day to redeem their free soda.

[Josh Arnold]

It's also not there. There won't be a ton of those.

[Christy Lee]

That was going to be my question. I don't know what.

[Ace Cosby]

That's the average. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

What is the 403? 390.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Ace Cosby]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

So. But I mean it can happen, obviously. But it's not.

[Tom Griswold]

Wouldn't it have been smarter to give away food?

[Christy Lee]

Not if you're sponsoring it in your Baja Blast.

[Tom Griswold]

Good point. Yeah. You.

[Josh Arnold]

You do what the people with the money say.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm just thinking, but if it's for stone, if it's for stoners, don't you want them to go and get a Baja Blast, buy a few tacos?

[Christy Lee]

They will if they're going to get their free Baja.

[Tom Griswold]

I see, I see. Okay.

[Christy Lee]

They'll buy food.

[Tom Griswold]

But you think they chose 420 for a reason?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Ace Cosby]

You come with a pre roll.

[Tom Griswold]

Stoners assigns bring steroids back to baseball. Okay.

[Ace Cosby]

It looks here like Tom Brady says he's Wayne coming out of retirement, but the NFL does not like the idea. He said he thought about returning to the NFL, but the league isn't a fan of the idea. In an interview released on Thursday, Brady told CNBC he asked about the eligibility rules for minority owner. He says the NFL wasn't too receptive and he's very happily retired. He owns a minority stake and aces Las Vegas Raiders.

[Tom Griswold]

Is am I correct in saying he's also. But he is going to. He's going to do the flag football thing in the Olympics.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, he played a game last weekend.

[Tom Griswold]

But isn't that his goal, to be in the Olympics?

[Pat Godwin]

Really?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I think so.

[Christy Lee]

That's four years from now, right? Because we just had.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, he's in pretty good shape. I think he'd be just fine.

[Christy Lee]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

You don't think so?

[Christy Lee]

I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

I think he'd be great. It'd be fun.

[Ace Cosby]

When we come back, I have a stupid world record.

[Tom Griswold]

Also coming up, we have an update on the guy that was caught. He was arrested for the 98th time.

[Christy Lee]

This is a great story.

[Tom Griswold]

And he was caught with a bong somehow built into his car.

[Christy Lee]

Now you just gave the whole.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, no, there's more. Also, we have a huge hunk of ejaculate news.

[Josh Arnold]

I was gonna say Jess Hooker's recipes have gotten terrible.

[Tom Griswold]

Too much salt. These are the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Andre Berto]

Add to or continue the conversation. Check out the Bob and Tom show on Facebook. Get the [e-mail] this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Tom Griswold]

This Easter, skip the ordinary and whip up something golden with melty, creamy Velveeta cheese. From scalloped potatoes to rich Mac and cheese, Velveeta turns every bite into a crowd pleasing celebration, bringing the extra to the ordinary, transforming simple sides into lip smacking satisfying moments. So go on, make it melt. Make it craveable. Make it indulgent. Velveeta, respect the drip. Visit velveeta.com easter for some recipe Inspiration Ready to win. Coming up.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey there. It's the Bob and Tom show live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Christy Lee's at the news desk.

[Christy Lee]

Hi. Josh Arnold.

[Josh Arnold]

A vision in burgundy.

[Christy Lee]

Ah, thank you.

[Josh Arnold]

There's Pat Godwin.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello.

[Josh Arnold]

At the orangeandsouls.com sports desk, it's Jeff Oskay. Hello. Ace Cosby's there. Hello, I'm Josh Arnold. And there's Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Another quick letter. We were discussing the. The ashtrays made of hubcaps, and several people had never heard of this. And it was a staple in a certain era, you'd have the. The coffee table made of the AT T giant wire spool and the shelves made with concrete blocks. Yeah, the concrete blocks in plywood. And we mentioned the classic hubcap ashtray and got a great letter here from Mr. Watts. Mr. Watts is in Newton, Iowa. He goes, I was screaming at the radio whenever you discuss hubcap ashtrays. No one mentioned the famous Tanya Harding domestic assault incident where she, quote, allegedly assaulted her boyfriend with their hubcap ashtray.

[Christy Lee]

I thought that's why you. I wasn't here for this discussion. I thought maybe that's why you brought it up. And when you said the letter, I go, oh, who is it going to be from? Tanya Harding. But apparently.

[Ace Cosby]

Really, I never had heard of that.

[Christy Lee]

You don't remember that?

[Tom Griswold]

That was one of the true. The true white trash hillbilly references.

[Christy Lee]

This was. This was post Nancy Kerrigan. This was, you know, and by the

[Tom Griswold]

way, Rick is apparently a very astute listener. He. The ashtray incident occurred. He puts circus February 2000. Very funny. Thank you for referencing. Referencing Ron. Which does remind me. Real special event next. What is it? Oh, tomorrow it's going to be in Tiffin, Ohio. The special Laughter Lives on Tour, celebrating the life of Ron Sexton. And it's going to feature a special guest star subbing for Josh Arnold, Pat Godwin, Patty G. Stepping up along with Jeff Oskay and Kostaki Economopoulos. Guaranteed to be a good time. Did I say guarantit?

[Josh Arnold]

That's a great. Yeah, I heard Darren Tip.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, sorry,

[Jeff Oskay]

sorry.

[Tom Griswold]

I meant to say guarantee.

[Josh Arnold]

No, no, guaranteed. Might sell a few more tickets.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Ace Cosby]

It'll get me more excited.

[Tom Griswold]

It's the Ritz Theater. Wow. I can even change that word. The Ritz for guarantee. Okay, sorry, That's. That's Tiffin, Ohio. Tomorrow. I apologize to everyone who's been offended, and I don't mean it. Okay, let's see, what was I saying? Oh, yeah. Patty G. Yes, sir? I have an assignment for you.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm ready to go.

[Tom Griswold]

Let me. Let me get my pen. In a matter of moment. We get letters all the time, and they're from lots of different places, lots of small towns, and we have a list of unusual names of small towns. But this. This all comes based on a story that I could. I didn't understand why this was happening. It's a place called Bug Tussle.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

And I thought, so what? Why would anyone care?

[Josh Arnold]

That's from Petticoat Junction and Beverly Hill.

[Tom Griswold]

That's what?

[Christy Lee]

That's wrong.

[Josh Arnold]

They reference Bug Tussle.

[Christy Lee]

They do. You're right.

[Josh Arnold]

It's the biggest city near their town.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, well, because. Okay, well, there's more. There's more. I've got another reference here, but you go ahead and read the story.

[Christy Lee]

Residents of Bug Tussle, Texas, are dealing with an unusual problem. Missing street signs. More than 70 have been stolen, likely by visitors drawn to the town's unusual name. The thefts have created safety concerns and added costs for replacements. Local authorities are urging people to stop taking the signs as souvenirs. Established in the 1890s, Bug Tussle only has a population of 15.

[Josh Arnold]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

First of all, what they should do is just have a store there that sells the signs instead of having to replace.

[Christy Lee]

Exactly.

[Tom Griswold]

But I couldn't figure it out, so I did a little research. Ace, Bug Tussle is part of the Pokemon world.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, really?

[Tom Griswold]

So I'm wondering if it's. If it's Pettico Junction fans or. Or Pokemon fonts. Is it Pokemon or Pokemon?

[Christy Lee]

Pokemon.

[Josh Arnold]

Pokemon.

[Christy Lee]

Pokemon. Sorry.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Ace Cosby]

No, no, no. Petticoat Junction fans could climb up that high.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. That was the worst show. Even as a kid, I don't think

[Josh Arnold]

I watched 5 seconds Saturday mornings on me TV at 5am so is it pretty good?

[Tom Griswold]

No, it's all.

[Pat Godwin]

I don't even remember it.

[Josh Arnold]

The daughters are cute.

[Christy Lee]

The daughters are cute.

[Tom Griswold]

That's all they.

[Christy Lee]

And they're naked in a water tank.

[Tom Griswold]

It's awful beginning. The Beverly Hillbillies and Billy Joe. The Beverly Hillbillies really did have some. Actually raised some very interesting issues.

[Christy Lee]

What do you mean they raised some issues?

[Tom Griswold]

Because.

[Ace Cosby]

Is this what you did your thesis on?

[Tom Griswold]

Because the banker was Mr. Drysdale.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

He was a complete jerk.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

And Jed Clampett was this naive guy from the hills. That was a great guy. He was honest and he was smarter than everybody. But I just thought it was a great show. But the Petticoat junks are awful. They didn't have that kind of heavy thesis. Didn't have the gravitas of a Beverly Hill, not to mention a great song, but. So I didn't realize that's where Bug Tussle was from. But there is a Pokemon reference there. Okay, so there you go. But that led me to doing a little bit of homework about town names. And we've talked about a couple of these. There's so many just, just bizarre names. And I gave Christy the list. Any that stand out for you?

[Christy Lee]

How about Belchertown, Massachusetts?

[Tom Griswold]

Sure.

[Christy Lee]

Truth or Consequences, New Mexico. Yeah, I'm very familiar with that when I lived in that wonderful state. There's also Woonsocket, Rhode Island.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, what's the one, Dick face? What is it again?

[Pat Godwin]

Dick shooter.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, even worse dick shooter. What state's that in?

[Pat Godwin]

Idaho.

[Christy Lee]

Idaho.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, been there.

[Christy Lee]

Ding Dong Texas.

[Pat Godwin]

Ding Dong Texas.

[Christy Lee]

Lick Fork, West Virginia.

[Pat Godwin]

It's not too bad.

[Christy Lee]

And of course, the famous one on this show is Climax, Georgia. And there's a Climax, Michigan.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I wonder if they get their

[Christy Lee]

mail mix.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah, there's a. So many of these towns. There's also. Do you have the ones from the uk?

[Christy Lee]

I do.

[Pat Godwin]

It's gonna be even crazier.

[Christy Lee]

Let's see, there's a Gene Autry, Oklahoma. Who knew?

[Pat Godwin]

There's a London, England. Can you believe it?

[Christy Lee]

That doesn't make any sense. That is nuts. In the uk we have Wide Open in Newcastle upon Tyne. Pity me. In County Durham. No place. Also in County Durham.

[Josh Arnold]

Boy, that's a frustrating conversation. So where are you from? No place. Well, you don't have to be a smart ass.

[Tom Griswold]

Just trying to make small talks.

[Christy Lee]

How about Bushy Gap?

[Josh Arnold]

Wow.

[Ace Cosby]

Oh, I, I want to visit that.

[Josh Arnold]

I've been there.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah, we just Lately, lately it's a lot less bushy once brewed.

[Josh Arnold]

Are you a Bushman Oscar? What do you mean? You prefer what he means?

[Ace Cosby]

Oh, I don't, I, I, I don't care either way. I, I love it in all forms.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Because you and I kind of came up during the transitional phase.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

Like we, we were, I would imagine, experiencing things across before and after.

[Pat Godwin]

Okay, Tom, I are raising the bush.

[Christy Lee]

There's Giggleswick in North Yorkshire.

[Pat Godwin]

I like that.

[Christy Lee]

There's a Wham Bottom in Lancashire.

[Tom Griswold]

Wham Bottom.

[Ace Cosby]

Wham Bottom, that's where Boy George is from.

[Josh Arnold]

And then George Michael, he was actually in Wah.

[Christy Lee]

And there's Westward Ho in Devon, England.

[Tom Griswold]

Westward Ho.

[Christy Lee]

That's cool.

[Tom Griswold]

That's cool.

[Christy Lee]

Is that a movie?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, it is.

[Christy Lee]

I thought it was.

[Josh Arnold]

I mean it's definitely a classic phrase.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Wasn't that a like Abbott and Costello or something? I forget, I forgot Westward Ho. By the way, do we have to catch up with the shoe in of the week? I forgot about that.

[Christy Lee]

Oh yeah. Today's shoe and basketball pitch presented by orangeinsouls.com use promo code Bob and Tom at checkout to receive $5 off your total order plus free shipping in the u [e-mail] so if you are just waking up in the sweet sixteen last night, Arizona, boy, they took out Arkansas in a big way. 109.88. We have Iowa moving on, beating Nebraska 77.71. Illinois over Houston by 10 and then produced squeaks by Texas 79, 77. So tonight's games, and it's funny because these are all my, these picks I had early on. Duke over St. John's Michigan is gonna really give it to Alabama. Michigan State will edge out UConn and I have Iowa State moving on over Tennessee. It's going to be a wonderful Big Ten championship this year, I think.

[Tom Griswold]

Now Pat, when we come back, it's my understanding you have a tribute to some of these small town names.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, I've been there. I can attest to it.

[Tom Griswold]

There's one called Knock em stiff, Ohio. I've never heard of that one. Wankers, Oregon. Ketchup Town, South Carolina.

[Christy Lee]

I love that one.

[Josh Arnold]

All right, now do they go K e T or C A T?

[Tom Griswold]

It's K E T C H U

[Josh Arnold]

P. Okay, so they're not doing catsup.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, no. A good question. Because if someone says cats up, I'm out. Oh, this is a good one I never heard of before. We've, we've talked about Dildo, Newfoundland, but also in Canada. Have you ever heard of this one, Josh? St. Louis do.

[Pat Godwin]

Haha.

[Tom Griswold]

Quebec.

[Josh Arnold]

I have not.

[Tom Griswold]

And it's, it is St. Louis do. Then it's ha exclamation point. Ha exclamation point.

[Ace Cosby]

No way.

[Tom Griswold]

St. Louis de ha Quebec.

[Christy Lee]

It must be a funny town to live in. Laughing all the time.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, there's Prey, Montana. P R A Y. But yeah, Ketchuptown, South Carolina.

[Christy Lee]

Zigzag, Oregon. I like that name.

[Josh Arnold]

Zigzag.

[Christy Lee]

Zigzag.

[Josh Arnold]

That's where the rolling papers come from.

[Ace Cosby]

Yeah, I'm surprised that side doesn't get stolen.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, there's Blue Ball, Pennsylvania.

[Josh Arnold]

Is that right?

[Christy Lee]

I wonder if it's close to Intercourse, Pennsylvania.

[Pat Godwin]

It actually is.

[Christy Lee]

Is it really?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but it's a long Way to Climax, Michigan. Oh, this is too much mud. Butt, South Dakota.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, no.

[Tom Griswold]

And there's Butts, Missouri. You ever heard of that?

[Josh Arnold]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

How about Recluse, Wyoming?

[Pat Godwin]

I know, I know that one. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Population. One guy and he looks like Oscar. You know, if you were in St. Louis to haha Quebec, wouldn't you have a comedy festival? Oh, gosh, yeah, that just. That just demands it.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, move the Montreal one there.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, now here's something cool. Attention to Wisconsin. Partyville, Wisconsin. But it's spelled P A, R D E E. Oh, someone named. But that's still. Yeah, you're in Partyville. Come on. What was that great song? Party Town.

[Josh Arnold]

We're going to Party Town.

[Tom Griswold]

We're going to Partyville now. So, Pat, we're gonna come back with your song, but right now we're gonna talk about Christie's wheels.

[Christy Lee]

Well, you know how you get to all these great small towns, don't you, Pat? That's right. It's the Hyundai getaway sales event going on now. You can get a wonderful deal on an SUV like the Hyundai Santa Fe or Santa Fe hybrid, my favorite, of course, the Tucson hybrid. And then there's the Elantra. Bold, stylish, and with all the bells and whistles, all electric Fans. The Ionic 5 or the Ionic 9 is just waiting.

[Tom Griswold]

That was the one yesterday that got nothing.

[Christy Lee]

The Ionic five.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah, Josh, I said now for those of you poets out there, how about the Ionic Pentameter?

[Christy Lee]

Nothing.

[Tom Griswold]

Crickets.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, it was the.

[Ace Cosby]

The most silent that room had been all day.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, it was great.

[Tom Griswold]

It wasn't that quiet before they opened. No, there was no one there.

[Christy Lee]

Get down to your local Hyundai dealer for the Hyundai getaway sales event. A deal so right that it must be wrong, right? No, you're gonna love it. The Hyundai getaway sales event. Visit Hyundai USA.com for details. That's Hyundai USA.com coming up, sex and

[Tom Griswold]

space is in the news. We've got a couple genuine stories out of NASA, including something about a moon base and several stories about ejaculate and ejaculation from the world of science. Also one involving space, fertility and sperm in space. There's just a. I don't know why all these have converged. Today. Is today some. Is today National Sperm Day or something?

[Jeff Oskay]

I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, it will be on our show when we return to the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Josh Arnold]

Zootopia 2 has come home to Disney Plus. Let's go get ready for a new Case.

[Christy Lee]

We're the greatest partners of all time. New friends, Gary the snake and your last name, the snake Dream team.

[Tom Griswold]

New habitats. Zootopia has a secret reptile population.

[Josh Arnold]

You can watch the record breaking phenomenon at home.

[Tom Griswold]

Zootopia 2. Now available on Disney plus, rated PG. And right now you can get Disney plus and Hulu for just 4.99amonth for three months with a special limit to time. Offer ends March 24th. After three months, Plan Auto renews at 12.99amonth. Terms apply.

[Josh Arnold]

Hello, it's the Bob and Tom show live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. At the news desk, it's Christy Lee.

[Christy Lee]

Howdy.

[Josh Arnold]

With the guitar and the keyboard, it's Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hello.

[Josh Arnold]

With all the sports today@the orangeinsouls.com sports desk, it's Jeff Oskay.

[Ace Cosby]

Hey, Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

With an envel. Envil. We're to going.

[Tom Griswold]

Going with what exactly is that?

[Josh Arnold]

With an enviable amount. There we go. Of conf. Hipness and suave. It's Ace Cosby. Oh, thank you. I'm Josh Arnold. There's Tom. I'm done with trying to use my brain.

[Christy Lee]

I had to laugh yesterday. I saw pictures of Prince William. He was doing something, I don't know. But he didn't have a hat on. And he's holding on to the tough Tom just like you did.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, really?

[Christy Lee]

Yes. I couldn't.

[Tom Griswold]

Little acre up front, a little bit of air.

[Christy Lee]

Right up front.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. You were going to introduce me. You wanted to say something like a man with gravitas and yet swagger. Yes, yes, that would be good.

[Ace Cosby]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much. What was I. Oh, I know we were talking about these oddball towns with unusual names. Candy Kitchen, New Mexico. Sandwich, New Hampshire. Why not North Carolina? Knock Em Stiff, Ohio. Wankers Corner, Oregon. And Pat, you said you were, you were taking your, your girlfriend to Climax, Michigan, but. Yeah, but you got there before she did, funny enough.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, I've been. I get there early. I've been to all 50 states as a comedian and I performed in 49 of them.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Pat Godwin]

So I've been in some of these towns and in this particular song that I've just written, everything I say, these are actual, actual towns, actual cities.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Ace Cosby]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

Here we go.

[Pat Godwin]

And for the purpose of this, I've put my girlfriend up in Bangor, Maine. Because I always thought that was kind of funny. Where you going? I'm going to Banger.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm on the road.

[Pat Godwin]

My girl's in Bangor, Maine. I miss her, but I must be Strong. When shows are done it's off I go From Dick Shooter, Idaho I'll drive to banger all night long but first it's more head than intercourse In Goshen Hole I'm singing songs till I come to Washington Onto Climax, Michigan I'll drive the banger all night long Pretty soon I'm gonna get lucky But I gotta eat something first In Beaverlich, Kentucky I told my baby real soon I'll get the banger by the afternoon oh, she's my main squeeze and I'm a rambling man Geographically we're all wrong I'm down in sweet Lips, Tennessee and she's up in Maine where I belong

[Andre Berto]

My baby

[Pat Godwin]

loves to play cards have a few drinks and spoon so it's liquor at night Poke her all day if I get to bang her by the ass Afternoon and like Floyd Tucker the over the road Trucker When I get the banger I'm gonna finally take a nap Tribute to Ron there. We gonna do a show this Saturday.

[Josh Arnold]

There you go.

[Tom Griswold]

Very good. Very good, Pat. Now, I want to say that real quick, Pat is subbing for Josh. Coming up. This is going to be tomorrow night at the Ritz Theater in Tiffin, Ohio. It'll be Patty G. Castakia Kanamopoulos and Jeffrey Oskay with her. And by the way, Pat, I just noticed this letter. Thanks so much for being part of the St. Paul boys basketball fundraiser. Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah. We met that guy last yesterday.

[Pat Godwin]

He was there yesterday. Steve Miner.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Yeah. Because of your support, the program will continue to provide great opportunities for our players. Thanks again.

[Christy Lee]

He was very nice.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Big fans up there. Great guy.

[Tom Griswold]

So another Patty G. Performance. But once again, tomorrow you're subbing for Josh. Once again, Josh. Dealing with some painful health issues.

[Ace Cosby]

Josh, yesterday we had two fans that flew in from Nebraska. They flew in and I was like, oh, are you going to the game day? And they go, no, we just came to watch the morning show.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, right on.

[Ace Cosby]

They flew in from Nebraska to Cincinnati.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, cool. To watch the show.

[Tom Griswold]

Do you remember the time what was.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, we had a couple.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. They. They drove from Charleston, Florida to Charleston, but we were. We were. And we happened to be in Charleston, West Virginia.

[Christy Lee]

They went to Charleston, South Carolina.

[Tom Griswold]

But they kept coming.

[Christy Lee]

Yep. They kept driving.

[Tom Griswold]

Drove all the way.

[Ace Cosby]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

There was a. There was a famous episode of all in the Family where Archie Bunker inadvertently shipped the stuff to London, Ontario, instead of London, England, or vice versa. We have a. Another letter about what one calls one's male Member. This comes to us from Bob. I told my wife I was going to start calling my male member the truth because apparently she can't handle the truth very much. I like that.

[Ace Cosby]

Do you remember Andrew Jice Clay's joke about that when we were younger?

[Josh Arnold]

I don't.

[Ace Cosby]

He called his Stanley because it's the power drill. Oh, and 12 year old Jeff just found that delightful.

[Tom Griswold]

Now a semi older Jeff, you said you had a world record over there.

[Ace Cosby]

Oh, I do. Oh, you're gonna love this, Josh. It's food related. Travelers passing through Philadelphia International Airport got to enjoy the spoils of a Guinness world record attempt earlier this week. Organizers said they achieved a new Guinness world record for the longest line of cheesesteak sandwiches.

[Tom Griswold]

Was it the cheesesteak sandwiches or was it TSA?

[Ace Cosby]

With 1291 lined up inside a departure hall to mark National Cheesesteak Day, the display far surpassed the previous benchmark of 500 sandwiches. After the record was certified, volunteers handed out the the sandwiches to travelers, airport workers and TSA staff.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, that's nice.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

The TSA staff should get them, of course, every day.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, there you go.

[Tom Griswold]

But we've said this before. I the world records when they, when they just are lining up stuff, it's not like it's the world's longest cheesesteak.

[Josh Arnold]

Right. It's a number of sandwiches and technically that's four lines.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

That's just a lot of cheesesteaks. You don't really want win anything.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

I think I've ever had a cheesesteak.

[Josh Arnold]

What a nice thing to do.

[Christy Lee]

I think I've ever had a cheesesteak sandwich.

[Josh Arnold]

Huh. Oh, wow.

[Tom Griswold]

And the best one in Philly is

[Pat Godwin]

where Jim's on 4th and South.

[Tom Griswold]

Is that the famous one?

[Pat Godwin]

That's. Well, the famous one's Pats and Geno's, but the good one is Jim's. The Philly people. Yeah.

[Ace Cosby]

I had two famous yesterday for lunch.

[Christy Lee]

Really serious.

[Ace Cosby]

Yeah, it was.

[Christy Lee]

I bet you need it in Jason's car.

[Ace Cosby]

No, we did not because it's new.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

No. No eating in the car.

[Ace Cosby]

I, I, I, I appreciate that. I wouldn't, I didn't. I'm the one who didn't want to eat in the car. I don't want to mess up his new car.

[Tom Griswold]

So did you stop and have a nice leisurely lunch?

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah.

[Ace Cosby]

Oh, it was wonderful.

[Tom Griswold]

What time did you get back here?

[Ace Cosby]

Oh, after everyone else, they tore down a stage, put away all the equipment, drove it back, put it all up, and before we got back but no, I loved it. It was a great time. I like spend time.

[Pat Godwin]

See, on the way back.

[Ace Cosby]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

You could have driven with me. I know that.

[Josh Arnold]

What you.

[Tom Griswold]

When you drive with me, you like to sit in the back and close your eyes.

[Josh Arnold]

I do.

[Ace Cosby]

You're terrified.

[Christy Lee]

So what's on a. A chick? A cheese steak sandwich.

[Tom Griswold]

Just take a guess.

[Christy Lee]

Beef and cheese. That's it.

[Pat Godwin]

Well, no, no. You got your loose meat. You got your great bun that only can be made in Philadelphia ironically.

[Tom Griswold]

Lettuce, no meat.

[Christy Lee]

Do you put onions? Do you put lettuce?

[Pat Godwin]

You put onions?

[Ace Cosby]

Yeah, there's some onions. There's some peppers.

[Pat Godwin]

Green peppers, typically.

[Ace Cosby]

Yeah, yeah. There's some sauce to it.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Sometimes mushrooms on.

[Ace Cosby]

I got mushrooms on mine. Yeah, it was good.

[Christy Lee]

What's the difference between a French dip then and a cheesesteak?

[Tom Griswold]

French dip. You've got your au jus on the side and aramic.

[Pat Godwin]

Definitely different. The French dip's a little more charred.

[Christy Lee]

Big French dip fan.

[Ace Cosby]

Oh, then you would like a cheesesteak.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

So in any event, the. By the way, parenthetical to this, there may be some relief coming for the TSA workers at the airport.

[Jess Hooker]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, they.

[Tom Griswold]

There's a.

[Christy Lee]

The Senate did pass something this morning, real early this morning. The house is going to look at it today.

[Tom Griswold]

But that's the longest line of cheesecakes. Do you have the other record, the longest line of cocaine at the Miami airport.

[Ace Cosby]

Oh,

[Tom Griswold]

snorted that.

[Josh Arnold]

That went quickly.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now we have Christy Lee. Oh, thank you. By the way, Jeffrey, Oscar sitting in for Chick McGee over there at the orangeinsouls.com sports desk. Thank you. Orange insoles. And by the way, you can still possibly win that 4K TV. Sure. Your brackets busted. But let's move on. Is it. What was the story about? There's some kid has a. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

There's in the women's round, an eighth grader. Yeah. What 46 and. Oh, right now. So, yeah.

[Ace Cosby]

On the women's side.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, wow.

[Ace Cosby]

Cool.

[Tom Griswold]

What is. Do we know what the prize is?

[Christy Lee]

Espn. It's an ESPN bracket. So I would assume it's big money, right?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I have. That should also be a million dollars

[Christy Lee]

or whatever the heck I can look it up. Up.

[Tom Griswold]

Was. It wasn't was yesterday or the day before, wasn't it? That this is. This marks the day that it.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

The equal pay thing. Christy Lee, once again, it's amazing flying. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Southwest Airlines has changed its policy on plus size passengers, a move which some are calling a fat tax. Previously, Southwest allowed plus Size passengers to either buy a seat in advance and receive a refund later, or on flights that weren't full, request a second seat at the airport free of charge. This new policy states that the armrest is considered to be the definitive boundary between seats and that Southwest may determine in its sole discretion that an additional seat is necessary for safety purposes.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, okay. Okay.

[Christy Lee]

Travelers have reported that customer service.

[Tom Griswold]

Does it have to be in the same row? Sir, you have to buy another seat. Travelers have reported that you'll be sitting in row 18 and row 12.

[Christy Lee]

Customer service agents have singled them out for their appearance and forced them to buy another seat. San Francisco or SF Gate identified nearly a dozen viral videos from passengers talking about their humiliating experiences with the airline.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, you.

[Josh Arnold]

You might have to buy a second seat. Right.

[Ace Cosby]

I feel like if they went down to American Airlines, like, isn't that where the fatties fly on American?

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know.

[Ace Cosby]

You know, because all Americans are flying.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but I think you're looking. So if you're heavy, they're going to make you buy a second seat. But.

[Josh Arnold]

But if you're bleeding over.

[Tom Griswold]

But I. Do you get double snacks?

[Josh Arnold]

You should.

[Ace Cosby]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Does this mean you get.

[Josh Arnold]

I know you're.

[Tom Griswold]

You get a full Coke or do they hand you two half Coke?

[Josh Arnold]

You should get everything that second seat gets.

[Ace Cosby]

You get a whole diet Coke and three sandwiches.

[Christy Lee]

Does this mean that when you get to the gate, there'll be one of those fake seats sitting there like they do for your luggage, and you have to sit.

[Tom Griswold]

I have a.

[Ace Cosby]

See if you can sit in it.

[Tom Griswold]

Does the. Does the armrest come up?

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, of course.

[Tom Griswold]

So you can. You can take the armrest completely away, right?

[Christy Lee]

No, you just lift it up.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, you can lift it up, but if you're really kind of spilling into the other seat.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

So it's not just fat. It could be someone who says a very large butt.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, yeah. Which is a fat ass.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Okay. But you'd think, yeah, I see United

[Christy Lee]

Airlines in the news.

[Josh Arnold]

You know, by the way, I was taken out of a line in a theme park in Korea when I. When I lived there because they thought I was too big for the roller coaster. And so they, like, hey, they pulled me out of the line, and I had to, in front of everybody, sit in one of those fake seats and see if they could get the seat belt fastened and everything.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh. How'd you handle it?

[Josh Arnold]

I was fine. I was. My buddy and I were kind of laughing, actually, but people in line were laughing.

[Tom Griswold]

It's like it's at the airport. They have that box.

[Christy Lee]

That's what I just said.

[Josh Arnold]

This was a fake roller coaster seat. And.

[Ace Cosby]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

I just sit in it. They got one click and they're like, you're fine.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, so your point is, are they going to have a seat? Okay.

[Christy Lee]

I didn't understand the gate or get through the gate to buy another seat.

[Josh Arnold]

How can you buy an extra seat if your flight is full? Well, yeah, that's the tough part there. Most flights are.

[Ace Cosby]

I'm not making this up, but like I said, I, I'm pretty sure they changed the name of it. But back in the day, the seat belt extender that they would come. They used to call it the elephant belt.

[Christy Lee]

I think you.

[Josh Arnold]

I mean, I imagine slang.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Workplace may not be.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

In the actual directives to the flight attendants. I think like everything, every, every business has its right slang. And I remember the story we had about Starbucks and all of the, the baristas. They had. They had a whole bunch of slang terms for stuff. They wouldn't necessarily use the correct name and the. You could get in trouble for some of them. Some of them were inappropriate. I'm surprised. Southwest of all airlines, because they're named after my favorite chicken wrap, the Southwest. The Southwestern chicken wrap. That is strips.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Maybe. Or the little bit of romaine black beans there.

[Christy Lee]

United Airlines on the other end of the spectrum is introducing a new way to stretch out. They've announced the United Relax row, a set of three economy seats that convert into a couch like space. The leg rests fold up at a 90 degree angle, creating a flat area designed for sleeping, relaxing, or watching movies.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

The feature will debut in 2027 on long haul flights with up to 12 sections per aircraft.

[Tom Griswold]

Get to spoon with a stranger. Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Check this out. You get a mattress pad, extra pillows and blankets, and even plush toys for your kids.

[Josh Arnold]

Wow.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. That'll be on 200 widebody jets by 2030. So that's a big.

[Tom Griswold]

When do they start?

[Christy Lee]

2027. And this would probably be overseas flights.

[Tom Griswold]

So we're a T minus a year away from. Yeah, but it's still people trying to join the mile high club on United. This is a scam.

[Christy Lee]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

How so?

[Christy Lee]

What do you mean a scam?

[Tom Griswold]

They just want your change.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. They want it all fall out into the couch.

[Tom Griswold]

There. Oh, there's.

[Christy Lee]

There it is.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. If there's a photograph of it, I. Yeah. People are going to absolutely be.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, that's disgusting. Those two women aren't the same age at all.

[Pat Godwin]

I saw that person. I didn't couldn't figure it out.

[Ace Cosby]

Oh, I'm sorry.

[Josh Arnold]

That's a mother and daughter.

[Ace Cosby]

Sorry.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I thought it was a dude.

[Christy Lee]

What?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, I did too at first.

[Tom Griswold]

The one on the left. That is an unfortunate photograph. Did you get that is. Yeah. They gotta fix that.

[Christy Lee]

There's nothing wrong with that.

[Tom Griswold]

Looks like Eddie veteran at all. 10 year old.

[Josh Arnold]

How greasy that lady's hair is. How long has she been on that flight? Like 12 days.

[Tom Griswold]

Coming up, we have, for some reason we have things about how frequent ejaculation can be very healthy. We have sperm in space. We have general ejaculate health tips. We got it all coming up.

[Josh Arnold]

I am general ejaculate.

[Tom Griswold]

I was going to say our sperm hunk. More of a wad really. These are the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Andre Berto]

This is the Bob and Tom Show. Reach us toll free at 1-888-bobtom1 [e-mail] this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Christy Lee]

This episode is brought to you by Alexa. Say hello to Alexa and see how Alexa can do more for you. Need tickets to that last minute show. Craving your favorite restaurant? Sit back, relax and talk naturally. Alexa's on it. Alexa learns your preferences to create a personalized experience. And now Alexa is free with prime on your Amazon devices like echo and Fire TV. Learn more at Amazon.com Alexaplus.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey, it's the Bob and Tom Show. We're live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Christy Lee's at the news desk. Hi, there's Pat Godwin.

[Ace Cosby]

Hello.

[Josh Arnold]

Jeff Oskay across the way. Hey, man. He's at theorangeinsouls.com spot sports desk. There's Ace Cosby. Hey, Josh. I am Josh Arnold. And there's Tom Griswold.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much. Our pop up shop has popped up and it will be popping down next week. So it's, I think it's gonna be Sunday through Sunday. Okay. And I know that yesterday at our big event in Covington, Kentucky, getting ready for Cincinnati's first game, we sold out of almost all of our shirts. But we've got more here so you can actually get them online. And once again, those shirts are a special benefit project for Brave Gowns. We're giving the money to this little organization. They make little superhero suits for kids and kids that are in the hospital, capes and stuff. Just, it's just a great little charity. So you can, if you want to make a donation, you can just do that by Going to our website and click it over to their website or order one of these shirts. So the pop up shop is up, but it will be not up beginning Monday. So. So thanks to everybody that bought one and wear it well. And we got more of them if you need one. Okay. You can. We recommend you wear them to bed.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Nothing else.

[Josh Arnold]

Why not?

[Tom Griswold]

Just please send us a letter and report on how to you guys, how that goes.

[Christy Lee]

A T shirt in bed. Just a T shirt.

[Ace Cosby]

Oh, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Do you mean if a lady has a T shirt in bed? Nothing else?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, Tom, I was talking about a guy. Yes, a lady.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

I said do you guys find a T shirt in bed hot?

[Tom Griswold]

No. I think. Do I wear a T shirt, But I don't because it's too hot.

[Christy Lee]

Of course you would. You never think about sex. We know that.

[Tom Griswold]

Let's move forward. Here we have Kristi Lee at the Bob and Tom news desk. Are we gonna.

[Christy Lee]

We have a lot of sex in the news.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Christy Lee]

Researchers from Harvard University have found that frequent ejaculation could help keep the prostate healthy and reduce the risk of cancer.

[Tom Griswold]

There you go, Josh. You don't have to worry about that. You get diverticulitis, but at least your prostate is going to be healthy.

[Christy Lee]

In the study of nearly 32,000 men, researchers say that high levels of sexual activity can reduce the risk of contracting prostate cancer by 33%.

[Josh Arnold]

Whoa.

[Christy Lee]

21 being the optimum number of ejaculations per month.

[Tom Griswold]

How many?

[Christy Lee]

21.

[Josh Arnold]

Wow. That's optimal.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. That's a lot, isn't it?

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Pat Godwin]

That's high.

[Christy Lee]

That's high.

[Tom Griswold]

If you're beating on the door for the teenage mom. I'm just trying to stay healthy.

[Christy Lee]

Every husband in America is going to be using this tonight. Honey, do you want me to die?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, it doesn't say that it has to be teamwork.

[Christy Lee]

Well, of course not, but it could

[Tom Griswold]

be a solo work.

[Christy Lee]

Experts are not yet sure why, if

[Tom Griswold]

it's all solo work. By the way, the trade off blindness.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Have they done studies on that?

[Christy Lee]

They're not sure why this may lower your risk of prostate cancer, but speculate it could be up to the fact that it flushes out cancer causing toxins. Harvard researchers noted that an active sex life may be an indicator also of good general health, which in itself is likely to lower the risk of cancer.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, this also explains that wink I got from my doctor after my colon appeared clear after my colonoscopy. Well, how about that? Hey, Tom. You're doing great, Wink.

[Josh Arnold]

Your prostate size is good.

[Christy Lee]

If you want some math on this, 21 ejaculations per month equals 252 times annually, or almost 70% of the days.

[Pat Godwin]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

Or a bucket by volume.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, geez.

[Christy Lee]

Do you guys think you make that mark?

[Josh Arnold]

There was a time.

[Pat Godwin]

One is high for now.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. There was a time where I was over those numbers.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

And.

[Josh Arnold]

And who, by the way?

[Ace Cosby]

There was a time when I could have hit those numbers in two days

[Tom Griswold]

and you could have hit them across the room.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Ace Cosby]

Where did the going blind come from? Was there, like, some, like, 16th century?

[Christy Lee]

Is it a Catholic thing?

[Ace Cosby]

One guy went blind, he just happened to have taken care of himself that day?

[Christy Lee]

No, I think it was a religion.

[Josh Arnold]

What can we tell these kids? To quit them together?

[Pat Godwin]

That's what it is.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, yeah. Hair on the palms and going.

[Tom Griswold]

You can shave hair off your palms. So we all. That one didn't count, but, yeah, by them, by all means.

[Ace Cosby]

Well, I remember being told acne was caused by that. I mean, I tried. I had the worst acne. And I mean, I. I was like, well, I can't do that because I want the acne to go away. And, I mean, I made it three or four hours, never went away.

[Christy Lee]

Did the nuns tell you that at school?

[Ace Cosby]

That was just a rumor.

[Christy Lee]

All right.

[Ace Cosby]

I don't think the nuns ever talked to me about it.

[Christy Lee]

Luckily, no.

[Tom Griswold]

They probably. So the essence of this story is that. That a number of.

[Christy Lee]

We've heard this before.

[Tom Griswold]

Sexual events. In this case specifically, they think it can help prevent prostate cancer.

[Christy Lee]

Yes. An empty prostate is a healthy prostate. Remember? We've heard that term before.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, so maybe how about an album titled Crusty Socks and a Clean Colon? Sort of a little album title.

[Christy Lee]

Okay. I don't know if you know anything about the body, but the prostate and the colon do not. That's not a thing.

[Josh Arnold]

You can feel the prostate from the colon.

[Christy Lee]

Right. But it doesn't.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I know. Last time. The last time I had mine examined, I had the taste of latex in my throat for a week. That guy went deep.

[Josh Arnold]

I think you're a little far, doc.

[Ace Cosby]

Did he sneeze while he was.

[Christy Lee]

And if you've ever wondered what happens to an astronaut, but if they were to ejaculate in space, I've always wondered.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

An Australian doctor has your answer. Josh. Sex consultant Esme Louise James and astrophysicist Dr. Matthew Agnew tackled the topic of what they call spunk in space.

[Josh Arnold]

Spunk in space.

[Tom Griswold]

Doesn't that take some of the gravitas out of the study.

[Christy Lee]

Yes. Using the average weight of a man, 155 pounds, Dr. Agnew calculates that the velocity must equal.022126 inches per second. He adds, this means male astronauts who ejaculated in the vacuum of space now are traveling backwards at.0, 0.12 miles per hour, which is about the speed of an average garden snail. So when you ejaculate, it pushes you backwards.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, that.

[Tom Griswold]

I think in a perfect physical world it does. Also, it creates another Milky Way. Interestingly enough, I had to feel sorry for the guy cleaning the vents in the space capsule.

[Christy Lee]

Yikes.

[Tom Griswold]

This is more of a what, equal and opposite reaction physics thing. Okay. But we also have a story about scientific research about what would happen if someone tried to get, get impregnated in space.

[Christy Lee]

The astronauts would struggle.

[Tom Griswold]

There would be, there would be, there would be difficulties for both the men and the women, apparently.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, and all which also applies to, I think to some degree to the moon. And we have a story about what's next for the moon with respect to earthlings. And as you know, we're what, a couple of weeks away from, is it Artemis, that they're going to fly around the moon? They're not going to land yet, but they're going to go up there real soon and actually take a lap of the moon and come back down manned. Yeah. Pretty cool.

[Josh Arnold]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

But there's also.

[Christy Lee]

We've been there before.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, they just want to make sure

[Christy Lee]

everything's still the same as when they left it.

[Tom Griswold]

Last time we were there, it was analog. Now we're going to go to the digital moon. I mean, can you imagine how much more advanced all of the stuff is from, you know, 50 plus years ago, but yeah, it's, it's going to be interesting.

[Christy Lee]

Looks like April 1st is what they're looking for.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, and there is, there's another announcement just yesterday from NASA about something else they're going to do, moon wise. That's actually really cool. Plus, of all things in the news, do you remember d' Artagnan Three Musketeers? Yes. There's a bizarre story about the actual real d'. Artagnan and I don't know if that's the correct pronunciation.

[Christy Lee]

It doesn't look like.

[Tom Griswold]

It's probably Daltanyo or something. Sir La Paul d', Artagnan, He's a dancer. And the Prancer. What? Those aren't the right words. These are the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Andre Berto]

For a complete copy of the Bob and Tom Show Contest rules, go to bobandtom.com contest rules or just scroll down to the bottom of the page and see contest rules. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Christy Lee]

The sun shining, birds are singing, and all feels right in the world until

[Tom Griswold]

the season changes and suddenly you lose your motivation to get out of bed. In fact, one in five people experience some form of depression no matter the season or time of year.

[Christy Lee]

At the American Psychiatric association foundation, our vision is to build a mentally healthy nation for all because we want you to live your best life and be your best, best you all year round.

[Tom Griswold]

Please visit mentally healthy nation.org to learn more.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey, this is the Bob and Tom show coming at you live. There's Christy Lee at the news desk.

[Christy Lee]

Hello, Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

There's Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hey, Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

Jess Hooker has joined us.

[Jess Hooker]

Hello.

[Josh Arnold]

Hi, Jess. There's Jeff [e-mail] sports desk. Yes, sir, Ace Cosby. Hello. I am Josh Arnold. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts studios. Think O'Reilly Auto Parts for all your car care needs. Get the parts and service you need fast from the professional parts people at O'Reilly Auto Parts. And there's Tom Griswold.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much. Josh, real quick, once again, our spring pop up shop has popped up and among other things, we have the, the special shirts that we did for yesterday's broadcast celebrating the major League baseball opener in Cincinnati. The Reds, by the way, dropping that game. Game unfortunately, three zip. But those shirts, they're fun. We sold out.

[Christy Lee]

They're a winner.

[Tom Griswold]

Almost.

[Christy Lee]

Shirts are a winner.

[Tom Griswold]

Almost all of them. Yesterday we got a few left. But we do have more here. So if you'd like to get one. The pop up shop closes Sunday night.

[Jess Hooker]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

So.

[Jess Hooker]

So spend the weekend shopping.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. There you go. Just go to bob and tom.com and we would certainly appreciate it. The pop up shop, the, the special shirts that we did are we're donating the money to a little charity. They make superheroes, capes and stuff for kids in the hospital. It's called Brave gowns. A lot of nice little fun thing. Now we return to the news desk with Christy Lee. We've been discussing Ms. Hooker, the space space. And also there's, we have a, a lot of sperm news.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, well, it is that time of year.

[Pat Godwin]

Sperm season.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Well, yeah, a lot of animals are reproducing right now that read them.

[Tom Griswold]

We had scientists discussing ejaculate in space. But we also have what, Christy?

[Christy Lee]

Well, scientists also have studied why astronauts might struggle to actually have babies in space. The study on how sperm and eggs act in simulated microgravity found that sperm became disoriented while fertilization and embryo development were also impaired. This suggests that humans would encounter significant reproductive challenges during future space colonization efforts.

[Tom Griswold]

Not to mention, you know, the clearance in one of those space suits. You got the first four inches, you're still inside the suit.

[Josh Arnold]

You're gonna end up making a mess, I think. Not really getting where you need to go.

[Jess Hooker]

If you're a child conceived in space, does that make you an illegal alien?

[Josh Arnold]

I don't.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh,

[Pat Godwin]

I just got it. I like it.

[Tom Griswold]

They'd probably have to do some kind of legislation.

[Christy Lee]

You'd have to. Where your parents are from.

[Andre Berto]

No, no.

[Christy Lee]

Where you were on.

[Tom Griswold]

Where you are above the Earth when

[Christy Lee]

you were born or when you were conceived, they've had.

[Tom Griswold]

How does that work with babies born on airplanes?

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know.

[Pat Godwin]

It's a good question.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, yeah. I know. I bet it's where the parents live, right?

[Josh Arnold]

It's got. They must just default to that.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Where you live, would it matter?

[Josh Arnold]

Not in that instance, really. Internationally, probably.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. But if you were born over the ocean, this could get into a really huge can of worms.

[Christy Lee]

I don't think we're gonna have to worry about it in our lifetime.

[Tom Griswold]

Well. But they are concerned that it might not be easy to.

[Christy Lee]

Well, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

To fertilize the egg in space. Of course, they should send Elon Musk up there. He's got a pretty good track record.

[Pat Godwin]

I know. You can't conceive in Uranus.

[Josh Arnold]

You're right. You're right path,

[Tom Griswold]

Pat. How do you know that?

[Ace Cosby]

I know.

[Pat Godwin]

I know things.

[Christy Lee]

NASA has also announced a new $20 billion plan to build a base on the moon's south pole. According to CBS News, under the proposal, the agency would build a moon base featuring habitat jets, pressurized rovers, and nuclear power systems over the next seven years. It comes just after a week before the planned launch of NASA's Artemis 2 around the moon mission, which we discussed. It's supposed to be April 1st. Weather, of course, depending.

[Tom Griswold]

That's cool.

[Ace Cosby]

They're also going to be like, can we get a road that doesn't have potholes here on Earth first Before we start building stuff and other.

[Tom Griswold]

Among other things.

[Christy Lee]

Where's this $20 billion coming?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, they are gonna have. They are gonna have a driving range because that's been the tradition, as you know.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah. They'll be a top dolphin at Ikea right now.

[Tom Griswold]

And they're building it on the south pole of the moon. Because they don't want to interfere with Moon Santa.

[Josh Arnold]

You don't. You don't mess with Moon Santa.

[Tom Griswold]

It's on the north pole of the moon.

[Christy Lee]

Plus, we all know it's.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. I heard one guy say we've got to do this before some other country does.

[Ace Cosby]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah. We need to have missiles up there.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Like this is.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

We need to get there first.

[Christy Lee]

Can't we just all get along so we don't need any missiles.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, that's working.

[Josh Arnold]

I kind of like missiles.

[Ace Cosby]

They blow stuff up.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, they're cool. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

You want that thing blown up, Use a missile.

[Jeff Oskay]

It's awesome.

[Tom Griswold]

This is great news for your. If you have a One of those conspiracy. One of those cousins that's all wrapped up in conspiracies. Tell them about the moon base we're building. That'll keep him going for a while.

[Ace Cosby]

I want them to go up to prove that they were on the moon. I want them to go up and replace the flag with a Frito Lay flag. And then take a picture of that and send it back, and I'll believe they went.

[Tom Griswold]

Was Frito Lay putting up the money?

[Ace Cosby]

Yeah, why not? They're the only company I could think that had a flag. Just give me a break.

[Tom Griswold]

They should just. They should bid this out.

[Josh Arnold]

It could. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

You get up there, you know, it's pornhub. Right there. Right there. Right there.

[Christy Lee]

Scientists have also successfully harvested chickpeas from simulated moon dirt. Yeah, moon dirt or lunar regolith. Regolith. I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

Regolith.

[Christy Lee]

Regolith. It lacks the microorganisms and organic material required for plants to live. While heavy metals would make it toxic for plants.

[Tom Griswold]

So you can't grow anything in Earth. I mean, in moon dirt.

[Christy Lee]

Right. So to create the ideal growing conditions in moon dirt. Scientists added vermi compost. A byproduct of red wiggle worms, little earthworms. Meanwhile, the chickpeas were coated with the fungi. Oh, boy. Abscular. To help reduce the uptake of heavy metals. Sounds like a wonderful thing to eat. Sarah Santos, the principal investigator of the project, explained the findings. Helped them better understand what it'll take to grow food on the lunar surface.

[Tom Griswold]

In other words, it's impossible.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. How are you going to keep the plants in the ground?

[Tom Griswold]

How are you going to make moon hummus? If you want, you got chickpeas. This is not going to Work, work.

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, it sounds like we're not supposed to live up there.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, that's really the key. You've really hit on it.

[Ace Cosby]

We found the key to growing stuff in moon dirt is to take moon dirt and add earth dirt to it.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, no. Take moon dirt. Throw it away. Yeah, bring up your own dirt. This is not gonna work. No hummus in space. Well, thank you very much, Josh.

[Ace Cosby]

You ever have a chickpea before?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, man. Yeah? Yeah. Cost me an extra 100 bucks.

[Ace Cosby]

Oh, okay.

[Tom Griswold]

I see we're going down Boulder road with the urinators. Okay.

[Christy Lee]

OpenAI. In the news, they're shutting down their Sora AI video generation app. The company made the announcement on social media and said it would soon release more information about what the closure means for you users. This decision comes three months after OpenAI made a three year deal with Disney to bring many of its popular characters to sora's artificial intelligence video generator. In the wake of the recent news, Disney said, quote, it respects OpenAI's decision to exit the video generation business and to shift its priorities elsewhere.

[Josh Arnold]

I wonder to what? They're not doing any videos anymore.

[Ace Cosby]

They're having trouble with people making videos they shouldn't with them.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, people are making pornos.

[Josh Arnold]

Didn't we know that that would happen day one? Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Ace Cosby]

Huh. But I think it's so good now. Like we could put your face.

[Josh Arnold]

Exactly. I mean, it's like ruining some like high schoolers lives, you know, I think

[Tom Griswold]

the original intention was you could do Donald Duck wrestling with a hot dog.

[Ace Cosby]

Right?

[Tom Griswold]

You know, some fun silly stuff instead of Donald Duck wrestling. Never. Yeah. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, we blew it, didn't we? The human race. We. Yeah.

[Ace Cosby]

Couldn't handle it only took us six months.

[Tom Griswold]

So who knows? Some of this stuff, you just never know what's going to stick. Remember the NFT fad?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Are there still suckers out there buying those things?

[Jess Hooker]

I think so. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Really?

[Jess Hooker]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Still a thing. Okay. Yeah, but I, I. So OpenAI, for this aspect of its business, will be closed AI apparently. Yeah, but it was it primarily Porto that was.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I think probably that and other,

[Josh Arnold]

you know, just things that were nefarious.

[Ace Cosby]

I could tell you off air.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, did you experiment?

[Ace Cosby]

No, no, no, no.

[Tom Griswold]

Were people sending you things?

[Ace Cosby]

No, no.

[Christy Lee]

Sorry, I said off air.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, okay. Just asking.

[Ace Cosby]

Oh, look what time it is.

[Christy Lee]

I know.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, by the way, you missed it, Ms. Hooker.

[Jess Hooker]

What'd I miss?

[Tom Griswold]

We were talking about town names and did you know there's a town that's named after you, Hooker.

[Jess Hooker]

I do. And I is East Coast Oklahoma. Nope, not at all.

[Tom Griswold]

Hooker, Oklahoma.

[Jess Hooker]

I did not know there was a Hooker Oklahoma.

[Tom Griswold]

Climax, Georgia. Climax, Michigan.

[Jess Hooker]

Those are cousins. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Dick Shooter, I.D. sillier, Belchertown, Massachusetts.

[Jess Hooker]

That's funny. Did you have a dog named Belcher?

[Christy Lee]

I did, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Great dog. Knock em Stiff, Ohio.

[Jess Hooker]

I like that.

[Tom Griswold]

Ding Dong, Texas.

[Jess Hooker]

I love Ding Dong. I have two people here on staff that I nicknamed Ding and Dong.

[Josh Arnold]

That's where the Avon Corporation is at.

[Christy Lee]

Isn't that a snack cake? A Ding Dong.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

Chocolate with a white filling.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Hockey pucks.

[Jess Hooker]

Another one that's gotten way smaller than

[Josh Arnold]

not what it used to be at all. They were better when they were in the foil.

[Ace Cosby]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

They're not in foil anymore.

[Ace Cosby]

No.

[Jess Hooker]

No. Plastic.

[Christy Lee]

No, that's wrong.

[Josh Arnold]

Yep, Wrong.

[Tom Griswold]

See, there's also, believe it or not, Wankers Corner, Oregon.

[Josh Arnold]

You get into Wanker's Corner. I'm trying to teach here.

[Tom Griswold]

Everybody there's blind. Coming up. Christy, what have you got over?

[Christy Lee]

Coming up, we have a custom bong device in a car that's very interesting. D' Artagnan's in the news and we'll find out some more stuff.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, Right now I want to say hi to my friends at American American Financing. If you've been checking out those credit card bills, if you have a gigantic amount of money you owe and you just been kind of putting it off, you may have noticed that it gets to the point where every month all you can do is just pay off the interest. That's because the credit card companies can charge you up to 20 plus percent interest on that money that you haven't paid off yet. American Financing has an idea for you. If you own a home, and typically most homes are worth a lot more than they were just a few years ago, so you may have a lot of equity there. You can refinance that. And the way it works, you can take that cash and use some of it to just pay off those credit card bills so you're not paying that really high interest rate. The folks at American Financing sent me some numbers. Some of the average deals they've been doing lately, saving customers about $800 a month. They also have a program that might be able to delay two mortgage payments for you so you can get your head above water once again. See if this suits you. If you're a homeowner, this might be just the thing for you. You can give them a call, 866-889-2611, or just visit [e-mail] get some information, see if this might work out, work out in your life. Once again, it's americanfinancing.net Bob and Tom or just tell them the Bob and Tom show sent you. American Financing.net NMLS 182334 NMLSConsumeraccess.org APR for rates in the five start at 6.196%. For well qualified borrowers, call 866-889-2611. For details about credit costs and terms, visit AmericanFinancing.net BobandTom Square up a new

[Andre Berto]

podcast from Andre Berto.

[Tom Griswold]

Yo, what's going on, man? It's Andre Berto, two time world champ

[Andre Berto]

behind the scenes of life as a professional boxer.

[Tom Griswold]

People want to see more. They want to see who you are as a fighter. Like I said, the time is now. I really wanted to do that. Sit down from a fighter's perspective.

[Josh Arnold]

Find out what it really means to

[Tom Griswold]

be a fighter inside and outside the ring. This fight game is such a roll, roller coaster. Square up, follow and listen on your favorite platform. Let's go.

[Josh Arnold]

Thank you for joining us here at the Bob and Tom Show. We're live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. There's Christy Lee at the news desk.

[Christy Lee]

Hello.

[Josh Arnold]

With his guitar and his keyboard, there's Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hey, Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

Jess Hooker's over there.

[Jess Hooker]

Hello.

[Josh Arnold]

Next to her, it's Jeff oscar@the orangeinsouls.com sports desk.

[Ace Cosby]

Hey, man.

[Josh Arnold]

There's Ace Cosby.

[Ace Cosby]

Hey, Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm Josh Arnold. And there's Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much, Josh. Now we have Christy Lee at the news desk. We've covered a lot of ground. I think we've done every possible story about the male seed.

[Christy Lee]

Now we talked about frequent of ejaculation and how it can save your prostate. On the opposite side of that, apparently, if you don't ejaculate on a regular basis, it could hurt your sperm. That's right. Abstinence may spoil your sperm quality. Studies showed sexual abstinence not only led to DNA damage in sperm, but sperm motility and viability also declined.

[Tom Griswold]

So for these little swimmers, practice makes perfect.

[Christy Lee]

I guess.

[Tom Griswold]

So if you miss swim practice now,

[Josh Arnold]

you're not gonna swim as well.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. While going longer does increase the sperm, it may degrade the quality of those sperm.

[Tom Griswold]

So it increases the amount of.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Increases.

[Tom Griswold]

So if one waits a long period of time, it increases the number of little fellers swimming.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

So sometimes heard after five days, it the body sort of absorbs and it starts over. Yes. It's not really.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Get that funny taste in your mouth.

[Josh Arnold]

Boy, then you're really backed up, aren't you?

[Tom Griswold]

So if you don't want a bad batch, what is that? I wonder what the optimum time is between it then for fertilization? Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

I have no idea. But I know that when we were trying to conceive, they said to abstain for a while, not to have sex every day.

[Tom Griswold]

But this is saying, don't abstain too long or you're gonna have. Okay, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Bad quality.

[Josh Arnold]

Just like any good produce section, you need some turnover, Right?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, that's true. However, they ask you not to turn it over in the produce section.

[Josh Arnold]

They do ask you that. They ask you that very loud.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, you know, that's awkward with the grocer. Look, I'm just trying to improve my motility. I'm sorry about soiling the cantaloupes.

[Josh Arnold]

The label said kumquat.

[Ace Cosby]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Have you heard of the Quitter app?

[Josh Arnold]

Wow.

[Christy Lee]

It's Q, U I T T R. It's an app that claims to help men quit porn addiction.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh.

[Ace Cosby]

Oh, yeah, I've heard of this.

[Christy Lee]

Have you?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

Okay.

[Ace Cosby]

I have a friend who uses it, actually.

[Christy Lee]

It appears that the Quitter app has leaked intimate data on hundreds of their users, though.

[Ace Cosby]

I knew it. Take that, Matt.

[Christy Lee]

Hundreds of thousands after that.

[Tom Griswold]

Give the guy's name.

[Josh Arnold]

He didn't say. Renfield.

[Christy Lee]

A security flaw allowed an independent researcher to access a database containing extremely personal information including ages, masturbation frequency, triggers for pornography use, and the personal confessions about users struggles with porn addiction or porn.

[Josh Arnold]

Sounds like a nice thing. Helpful thing for some.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, so wait a minute, I'm confused. So guys get this and they enter data into it. How does it help them stop?

[Christy Lee]

I don't know. Are you familiar with how this works?

[Ace Cosby]

There's like a frequency. It's to like, try to make it. It's an accountability app where you're. You log how often and it's.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

So you have to use it correctly to make it work.

[Tom Griswold]

Your buddy Matt, can you take him some wet wipes? I've got him right here. He's got to go right to the phone.

[Jess Hooker]

Is it like at the end of the week when your phone will tell you you spent this much. You lost seven and a half hours to masturbation.

[Ace Cosby]

Exactly.

[Christy Lee]

I gotcha.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, but you got in 10,000 strokes. Right?

[Ace Cosby]

But no, there's like rewards. You went 24 hours without. So you get a reward or you get a badge.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, the A badge.

[Josh Arnold]

I guarantee.

[Tom Griswold]

Does your buddy Matt wear it around like he's.

[Josh Arnold]

It's got to be all.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Behavioral cognitive therapy.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, like anything else.

[Tom Griswold]

You type in your trigger?

[Ace Cosby]

I believe so. Like it's an accountability.

[Tom Griswold]

Which fast food waitresses you like the best? Hey, the chicken Chipotle behind the counter.

[Christy Lee]

Hot. I think that says something about Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't really go there. No. That is weird. Does it work?

[Ace Cosby]

It's helped him.

[Josh Arnold]

Good.

[Ace Cosby]

He said so.

[Josh Arnold]

This is going to be. If it's not already an epidemic.

[Jess Hooker]

There is an app to make you quit your phone. Like to stay off of your phone.

[Christy Lee]

Well, how do you do it? You gotta be on your own.

[Jess Hooker]

That's.

[Tom Griswold]

It prints out. Throw me into a river.

[Ace Cosby]

It just sends you a landline.

[Tom Griswold]

Is this friend of yours? Matt? Not his real name.

[Josh Arnold]

Not his real name.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Is. Is he a married guy?

[Ace Cosby]

He is.

[Tom Griswold]

I see. This is why nobody has the ass.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

It's a good thing.

[Ace Cosby]

It's a good thing for. If someone feels that they are dealing

[Tom Griswold]

with an issue but you say it's in the news because they've. Their data has been breached.

[Christy Lee]

600,000 users. The data has been breached.

[Josh Arnold]

But I wouldn't be embarrassed.

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Hey, I saw your name in that list. The list where it says I look at porn and would like some assistance with it.

[Tom Griswold]

It.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I saw your picture on a milk carton.

[Josh Arnold]

I mean, who.

[Tom Griswold]

Who care?

[Jess Hooker]

I'd be more concerned with the guy looking up the names on the list.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, good point.

[Christy Lee]

Researchers are also working now to decode the science behind the expression on the human face during orgasm. Your O face.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh.

[Christy Lee]

You know what your O face looks like?

[Josh Arnold]

No.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I don't either do.

[Tom Griswold]

What is. What are scientists doing? Help. Read it again.

[Christy Lee]

They're working to decode the science behind the expression on your O face during orgasm. Analyzing real world videos, scientists found people climaxing frequently displayed closed eyes, lowered brows and a dropped jaw which resembles.

[Josh Arnold]

That's me sneezing about the same face.

[Christy Lee]

Says it resembles the universal facial expression of pain.

[Tom Griswold]

So some. Some guy wrote a proposal and got a grant.

[Josh Arnold]

Unbelievable. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

To study the O. What are the O faces of the aforementioned waitresses and encounter people at Chipotle.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Good for you.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

That's.

[Tom Griswold]

Did they ask people or they.

[Christy Lee]

They watched videos.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. So these are legit.

[Christy Lee]

Yes. They're not porn people. They're real. Real people, real life, real videos.

[Tom Griswold]

So they. So they had to get people to come volunteer to.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

Looks like you could have your Partner, just. Hey, can you hold my phone and record this for just a second?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

That would be a little awkward, but

[Tom Griswold]

you say it's similar to pain?

[Christy Lee]

That's what they say.

[Josh Arnold]

That makes sense.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Kind of grim, Kind of grimace or.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Clench up or tense up.

[Ace Cosby]

But have you ladies ever been around a man who. His O face was just like it made you laugh, like it was uncomfortable or.

[Josh Arnold]

No face? Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

No, I don't think so. No. Not at all. No.

[Tom Griswold]

So you're saying when my Uncle Clarence famously hit his thumb with that hammer, that's what it looked like with any Gurk?

[Josh Arnold]

Maybe.

[Christy Lee]

Well, that's how you want to look at it? Yikes.

[Tom Griswold]

Yikes.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. A survey from Bespoke Surgical offers some interesting insights into the attitudes about the average male member. They pulled 3,000 U.S. adults. 90% said they have measured their penis size. I hope these are men.

[Josh Arnold]

I haven't. Have you guys? Yeah, you have. Yeah. He says no, Pat.

[Pat Godwin]

I think as a kid I did.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, Pat, did you use a microscope? No, No. I was gonna say a yardstick.

[Pat Godwin]

I was trying to stick you, not

[Tom Griswold]

give you a little gravitas there.

[Josh Arnold]

Can I measure mine?

[Tom Griswold]

No. When you measure, where do you start?

[Ace Cosby]

Well, that was my issue when I did it. I was married, and I. My lady came in and caught me. I was like, hey, look, I'm average. I'm at 6. And she's like, oh, well, you aren't supposed to start measuring at your B hole.

[Christy Lee]

Oh.

[Ace Cosby]

I was like, oh, that's. That's the issue.

[Christy Lee]

55% say they often compare their penis size to others. You guys walk around talking about that?

[Ace Cosby]

No.

[Josh Arnold]

No, we don't.

[Christy Lee]

I wouldn't think so.

[Jess Hooker]

I guess you guys haven't seen each other's right?

[Josh Arnold]

In this room.

[Ace Cosby]

No.

[Josh Arnold]

No, I haven't seen anybody.

[Ace Cosby]

I've seen Tom's. Oh, he always talks to me. Some power move. I don't understand the.

[Tom Griswold]

Is this one of those things where the. The information they get is based on people saying it about themselves?

[Christy Lee]

Well, the average self reported erect penis length in the US they say self reported.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

That's the 6.34 inches average. The average man grows 3.09 inches between being flaccid and erect. I don't know if that's self reported. That could be a fact. When talking with friends and potential romantic partners, 65% of people overestimate their penis size, while 30% underestimate.

[Josh Arnold]

Interesting.

[Ace Cosby]

Always underestimate estimate.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Ace Cosby]

You always want to leave them with a surprise in A positive way.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Ace Cosby]

Don't want to over promise and under deliver.

[Tom Griswold]

Give it to them in centimeters.

[Christy Lee]

80% say they're confident or very confident in the size of their male member and feel good about their penis.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Christy Lee]

75% say a partner has commented on the size. 60% of all.

[Tom Griswold]

Is that a common. Do you think?

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

You, you would only say something positive, right?

[Christy Lee]

Well, yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Why would you say something negative?

[Tom Griswold]

I'm asking.

[Jess Hooker]

No, the, the comment that women use. If it's, if it's, they'll say it's perfect for me. That's, that's the one, guys. That. Yeah. If, if the size is average and it's fine, then she'll say it's perfect for me.

[Christy Lee]

60% of all respondents, which includes multiple gender, say girth matters more than length.

[Josh Arnold]

I knew it.

[Christy Lee]

Yep.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh yeah. Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean that was an enthusiastic endorsement.

[Josh Arnold]

Everybody likes a foot long, but all you need is a 6 inch with extra meat.

[Andre Berto]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Of course, 90% of all respondents believe society puts too much emphasis on size. Most of those polled say emotional connection, chemistry and compatibility matter more in bed than penis size. Well, of course, course, that would make sense.

[Tom Griswold]

Now there's a list here of the sizes of the male member by state.

[Josh Arnold]

Who's biggest?

[Tom Griswold]

Iowa.

[Josh Arnold]

Iowa.

[Christy Lee]

Ah, those corn farms carrying around some hogs.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah,

[Tom Griswold]

this is really funny. They've got a map. It's like you're looking at a geography class book. There is a map with. They have different vegetables depending on your length. Banana is number one and down the list is a pickle.

[Christy Lee]

So they don't say the size, they just have a vegetable.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, no, they've got, they've got the size. You name a state.

[Christy Lee]

Well, so what's the largest? If Iowa is the largest, what is the average there?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I'd have to, I don't know. The.

[Pat Godwin]

Got the smallest over there.

[Josh Arnold]

What's the smallest?

[Tom Griswold]

I'm looking at the map.

[Josh Arnold]

Right, Right now, smallest has got to be Alaska. It's so cold, right?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, bitter cold. Let's see. Alaska is very small. It's, it's below, below 6. Whereas Iowa coming in well over 7. Oh, so again, this is based on self reporting.

[Christy Lee]

The banana represents 6 to 6.4 inches.

[Ace Cosby]

Ah, well, luckily men never embellish.

[Christy Lee]

No, no, no.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. In the top five you've got Iowa, sp, South Carolina and Indiana, among others. So there you go. Nice work, fellas. Oh, they've also got. Gee, they have really done a lot of stat work here. They have these states with the Biggest differential in terms of growing.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah. So there's too many numbers here to look at. So. So I'm sorry.

[Christy Lee]

That's okay.

[Tom Griswold]

You'll have to look this up on your own now. Oh, the biggest growers. Also Iowa.

[Christy Lee]

Sorry.

[Tom Griswold]

Iowa, South Carolina, Indiana. There you go. And Maine. Pat, do you have a song about this?

[Pat Godwin]

The Greek Physique song?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Okay. Now, you were just saying earlier you have performed in every state in the union.

[Pat Godwin]

50 states. Yeah. I performed in 49 because when I went to Hawaii, we just went to the airport hotel and then got on the cruise ship where I performed.

[Tom Griswold]

Performed.

[Pat Godwin]

So technically I've been to Hawaii.

[Christy Lee]

Were you still at the dock when you performed in Alaska?

[Pat Godwin]

I was still at the dock. We did an afternoon show, but in Hawaii we left and did the show in the ocean.

[Christy Lee]

I was gonna give you that one if you.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, I gotta get back to Hawaii to make this work. I think we should have this show. Send me. How far offshore were you, I mean, to do it? Probably.

[Tom Griswold]

Why?

[Pat Godwin]

I mean, probably about a six hour.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, so you weren't in Hawaiian water?

[Pat Godwin]

No, we would have left about 4pm and did a show that night at 9.

[Tom Griswold]

I should point this out. Pat Goddard will be doing a show on Land on Saturday evening. He's subbing for Josh Arnold. Josh is here, but Josh is having some belly issues. And it'll be Jeff Oskay, Pat Goddard and Castakiamopoulos. A special show at the Ritz Theater this Saturday night. Saturday at the Tiffin, Ohio's Ritz Theater. So you can see Patty G. It'll. It'll be. That'll be a terrific show. While I'm at it, a bunch of our friends are out there doing stuff. Mark Shallafu from yesterday, he's going to be at the Liberty Funny Bone this week and he was great. He was on with us yesterday. So funny. Willie G's at the Starved Rock Lodge in Oglesby, Illinois, tonight. Tickets are available on Willie's Instagram now. Also, Greg Warren down the road. This is real important. This is really cool. For Greg, it's his homecoming at the Galois Theater in Springfield, Missouri, Saturday, April 11th. Also this weekend, Nick Griffin comedy Off Broadway in Lexington. Those will be great shows. And Little Timmy Cavanaugh with Johnny Kavanaugh, no relation. He's a Kavanaugh with a K. He's at Mason City Limits Comedy Club in Mason City, Illinois. Just some of the shows happening this weekend. Now. What you got coming up, Christie Lee?

[Christy Lee]

Coming up, we have a new Blue Bell ice cream flavor. For those of you who are into that, we have a custom bong.

[Tom Griswold]

We have the bong story is absolutely amazing.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. And we have bears in the news, kind of.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, right now we have your feet in the news thanks to Orange Insoles. Josh, tell me more.

[Josh Arnold]

That's right. Feet get tired, my friends. You know that arches can collapse. Heels ache, knees complain, lower back tighten up, makes you make noises when you get up or sit down. Well, it's not just getting old. You may have a poor foundation. Check out orangeinsoles.com because orange insoles deliver rigid arch support that do not collapse by lunchtime. They've got deep heel cups that cradle your heels and absorb shock naturally. And they help maintain alignment as your feet and legs fatigue that reduces all kinds of stress. Knees, hips, lower back stress. Durable enough for work boots yet comfortable enough for everyday wear. So they're built for real people on concrete, on job sites, in hospitals, classrooms, warehouses, maybe restaurants, anywhere. You're on your feet all day. If you've ever said my feet are killing me, check out orange insoles, especially now, it's a great time to do so because when you visit orangensouls.com you can order more and save with Orange and Souls bundle packs. Be sure to use this promo code Bob and Tom at checkout to receive $5 off your total order. Plus, you're gonna get free shipping in the usa, so there's no reason to dilly dally. Get on this post haste. Orangeinsols.com and that's promo code Bob and Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much, Josh. Oh, and by the way, we can still offer you the opportunity to win a 4K TV from Orange Insouls. Check out the [e-mail] Also coming up, a very interesting variation on the Scarecrow involving live human beings. This is all.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, your history lesson.

[Tom Griswold]

Got a history lesson for you, of course. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Andre Berto]

Hey, thanks for listening this morning. Got something to say? Send. Send us an email. Bob and Tom.

[Christy Lee]

Bob and Tom.com tired of partisan noise?

[Tom Griswold]

America's more divided than ever. But independent Americans is adding light to contrast all that heat.

[Christy Lee]

Independent Americans Daily news with army veteran Paul Rykoff.

[Tom Griswold]

Pressing issues of the day with leaders who are shaping what America will be in the future. We're going to bring the righteous media five eyes. Independence, integrity, integrity, information, inspiration and impact.

[Christy Lee]

Join the movement Independent Americans from Believe. Follow and listen on your favorite platform website.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey there, it's the Bob and Tom show live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Christy Lee's at the news desk. Hey, Pat Godwin's there.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello.

[Josh Arnold]

Jess Hooker is there.

[Jess Hooker]

Hello.

[Josh Arnold]

theorangeinsouls.com sports desk, it's Jeff Oskay.

[Ace Cosby]

Hey, man.

[Josh Arnold]

Ace Cosby.

[Christy Lee]

Hello.

[Josh Arnold]

Good to see you. I am Josh Arnold. There's Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Good to see you, Josh. I know you're a little bit under the weather, but it's nice to have you back here in the studios.

[Josh Arnold]

Nice to be here.

[Tom Griswold]

Are you able to walk around and do stuff?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, yeah. The pain flares up.

[Christy Lee]

No. He crawls.

[Tom Griswold]

No, but I mean, he's.

[Ace Cosby]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. I have to, I have to take it easy a little bit. But I did get cleared to, you know, do some stretching and stuff like that, so.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, well, good.

[Ace Cosby]

When will you be cleared for fishing?

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know if I can stand longer than half an hour without some pain.

[Christy Lee]

Can you sit and fish?

[Josh Arnold]

No.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

You know, if I were on a boat. Yes.

[Christy Lee]

All right. But on the bank you can't.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, yeah. You're moving a lot.

[Christy Lee]

Gotcha.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, we appreciate your being here, and right now we're going to do a little bit of history for you. We like to educate the audience with interesting events from the world of history. I often turn them into questions. For example, on this date in 1980, what erupted?

[Christy Lee]

Mount Helen. Mount Saint Helen.

[Tom Griswold]

Mount Saint Helen, yeah. Do you remember that? Remember they had all the. Isn't that the one? They had all the warnings about it. There was that one guy who's, yeah. He and his dog, his name was Harry Truman. They interviewed me. So, you know, I'm not leaving.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I felt bad for the dog.

[Christy Lee]

Me, too.

[Tom Griswold]

The dog sitting there going, what? What?

[Christy Lee]

I want to go.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Hold it. Hot lava? No, thanks. Let's see, what else? Oh, coming up, by the way, we forgot to. We have a story, but is kind of related to history. D'. Artagnan. We'll get to. We'll get.

[Christy Lee]

Now we got that.

[Tom Griswold]

Coming up, a really unusual story about the, the historical, if you will, the real d' Artagnan on this date. Let's see. See, this is important. 1998, the FDA approved something that really changed, changed the world. What was it?

[Christy Lee]

1998. E.D.

[Jess Hooker]

drugs.

[Tom Griswold]

I'll get you.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Viagra.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Ace Cosby]

Oh, nice.

[Tom Griswold]

1998.

[Christy Lee]

Wow. I thought it was before that.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, it was a hard decision. Took him a while. Am I. And I'm. Wasn't Bob Dole the famous spokesperson for that?

[Christy Lee]

Sure was.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, good for him.

[Josh Arnold]

You Thought this pencil in my hand was hard.

[Tom Griswold]

Senator Dole always had a pen on his hand because he had a war injury, but.

[Christy Lee]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but he did do those. I'd forgotten about that. Also, we have a couple of birthdays on this. If you're making a birthday cake for Quentin Tarantino, what are you going to make it in the shape of a foot, probably. A foot, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

He likes feet.

[Tom Griswold]

Quentin, of course. Famous ace for his pizza rolls.

[Christy Lee]

That's Totino, not Tarantino.

[Ace Cosby]

Okay, Tarantino. Pizza rolls

[Tom Griswold]

shaped like feet.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Cut him with machete.

[Tom Griswold]

Happy birthday. Mariah Carey, 1971. 1. I just read that she makes a million dollars every December just from the.

[Jess Hooker]

I think she makes more than that.

[Tom Griswold]

Royalties for that one song.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Great song. I gotta tell you, I still. I still like it. Fergie, born in 1975. Not the. Not the royal one.

[Josh Arnold]

Not Sarah Ferguson.

[Ace Cosby]

The lady lumps. Yes, my lovely lady humps.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah, that, that. Yeah, of course. Yeah. Yes, yes, of course.

[Josh Arnold]

Lovely lady.

[Tom Griswold]

We'll do this one on the front. 1939, the first NCAA men's basketball tournament. And I think had only four teams.

[Christy Lee]

What?

[Tom Griswold]

I think I. I think it. Let me see. Yeah, they had eight teams.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, eight.

[Tom Griswold]

I wasn't enough. This could be wrong, but. Yeah, obviously it's a different thing now. Do you know who won in 19?

[Christy Lee]

What?

[Tom Griswold]

39.

[Josh Arnold]

The Delaware Caucasians.

[Tom Griswold]

Oregon defeated Ohio. Ohio State.

[Christy Lee]

I would never have guessed.

[Tom Griswold]

In 19. Yeah, no kidding. And on a showbiz note, Steve McQueen made his network television debut on Goodyear Playhouse.

[Christy Lee]

Was it Steve McQueen week?

[Tom Griswold]

The King of Cool.

[Pat Godwin]

I know.

[Tom Griswold]

And Ringo released Sentimental Journey, proof that Octopus's Garden wasn't a fluke.

[Christy Lee]

Well, I don't remember that.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm like, like, I like Ringo stuff.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I saw him in concert. He's great, but.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, he always has a terrific band with him.

[Pat Godwin]

I like it.

[Josh Arnold]

Don't come easy. Do you guys like that one?

[Pat Godwin]

I love that song.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

George Harrison wrote that.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, he did. And then Ringo did it.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

No, he wrote like. Yeah, wrote it with him a little bit.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. But Ringo's all. Ringo's a great drummer. Yeah. Now, Christy, I mentioned we'll steer away from this, but this is kind of in history. This is a. A story about the Three Musketeers. For real.

[Christy Lee]

Archaeologists may have uncovered the remains of the famous soldier who inspired the Three Musketeers. The BBC reports the skeleton was found beneath St Peter and Paul Church in. Is it Maastricht in the Netherlands. The church's deacon Jos Valke believes the remains belonged to Charles Debatts de Castlemore, who was known as Count

[Tom Griswold]

d'. Artagnan.

[Christy Lee]

D' Artagnan d', Artagnan, a close aide to Francis Kings. Francis King Louis XIV, was killed during the Siege of Maastricht in 1673 and was later immortalized in the adventures by Alexandre Dumas. Archaeologist Wilm Diekschmann said his name.

[Tom Griswold]

That's pronounced Dickman.

[Christy Lee]

It's D I, J, K.

[Tom Griswold]

The J in dick is island.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, my God. Anything for a dick joke.

[Tom Griswold]

This is the hardest story you've ever read. There are so many weird words in it.

[Christy Lee]

Expectations are high, but preferred to wait for DNA confirmation before declaring the skeleton's identity.

[Tom Griswold]

But what are the Three Musketeers?

[Christy Lee]

The reason I can't say it is because d'. Artagnan. I've always heard the term, but I didn't read the Three Musketeers. Although I am an Alexander Dumas fan because I love the Count of Monte Cristo. But d' Artagnan is not spelled in my head the way it looks on paper. So every time I see it, it freaks me out a little bit.

[Tom Griswold]

It's French for nougat. Three musketeers.

[Ace Cosby]

You see, it's a three musketeers. Would you call that nougat?

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

100. I always thought nougat's way chewier.

[Christy Lee]

Really?

[Ace Cosby]

Yeah, I thought. Yeah, really?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Three Musketeers is more like a fluff, very fluffy. Some kind of life that used to be. In fact, it has a name. I forget what it is.

[Christy Lee]

Used to be my favorite candy bar and now I don't find them. No, I just. This says I like them.

[Tom Griswold]

This says that the candy bar was originally named Three Musketeers. It had three flavors because it had chocolate, vanilla and strawberry. Today. Today it's just known for chocolate. So now it's really.

[Christy Lee]

So they don't have chocolate, vanilla and strawberry in it anymore. Maybe that's why I don't like it.

[Tom Griswold]

Maybe it's just one musketeer.

[Ace Cosby]

It should come like a Twix. You should get three bars.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, that's a good idea. Okay, so this does a fluffy whipped nougat. So it's just. It's whipped nougat.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah. That's the difference.

[Ace Cosby]

What's the definition of nougat?

[Christy Lee]

Stuff in a candy bar.

[Jess Hooker]

I don't know. Where else? Yeah, where else do you find it?

[Josh Arnold]

In there. Says sea candy bar.

[Tom Griswold]

It would be cool. Although he's controversial. To have Ted Nugent do, do some kind of nougat. Nougat Nugent. And he does, he stays, starts playing one of his classics. That'd be very, very funny.

[Christy Lee]

Speaking of flavors, Blue Bell has a new flavor and it is out as of yesterday. It's called Brookie a la Mode ice cream. The new flavor blends brownies and chocolate chip cookies into a single dessert, features brown sugar ice cream mixed with chunks of brownies and soft chocolate chip cookie pieces.

[Tom Griswold]

Sounds great.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I would rather just have the vanilla with that stuff.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Not the brown sugar.

[Ace Cosby]

Brown sugar.

[Pat Godwin]

Brown sugar ice cream.

[Jess Hooker]

No, it's usually brown sugar swirls. Like it's not all brown sugar the way that bluebell does it.

[Christy Lee]

It's Brooklyn Brookie, Olive.

[Jess Hooker]

Rookies are a big thing right now.

[Ace Cosby]

Yeah. My kids.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

So I thought a brownie and a cookie.

[Tom Griswold]

Come on. I thought you said bookie. And it's kind of concerned, I know that we're, we've got gambling pretty much everywhere. On the pitcher's mound they've got Fanduel. Did you see that? Yesterday right there in the mound.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah. Electronically put on there. So a bookie ice cream would be just a natural fit. I'll have to try the Brookie. It sounds delightful. Coming up, a little bit of a beer run for you by request and some sad news from the world of music. We'll get to that coming up from here. The O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Andre Berto]

Hey, thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom show show this morning. Get a look at today's show on our YouTube channel.

[Josh Arnold]

Org. Hey, it's the Bob and Tom show. Live from the O'Reilly Auto Part Studios, there's Christy Lee at the news desk. Hello, Pat Godwin's there.

[Ace Cosby]

Hello.

[Josh Arnold]

Hi, Jess Hooker.

[Jess Hooker]

Hello.

[Josh Arnold]

At the orangeinsouls.com sports desk, it's Jeff Oscar.

[Ace Cosby]

That's right.

[Josh Arnold]

There's Ace Cosby. Hello, I am Josh Arnold. And there's Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Thanks very much, Josh. A couple quick things. The pop up shop with Bob and Tom's stuff, we don't do it too often, but it's up right now and we do have a handful of those shirts left that we are donating the money to Brave Gowns. Once again. It's a, it's a charity that makes little superhero outfits for kids that are in the hospital. Fun little thing. And we sold a bunch of them. Almost sold them out yesterday. But we have a bunch here. So if you'd like to get one, get online before [e-mail] it's our pop up shop. And this is the shirt that is in honor of the opening of Cincinnati baseball. It's kind of cool. Lots of other stuff there, so please check it out. And also, while I'm at it, I'll remind you that Patty G is sitting in for Josh coming up tomorrow in Tiffin, Ohio, with the Ritz. It'll be Jeff Oskay, Kostaki Economopoulos, and Pat Godwin. And we're going to get a song out of Pat in a matter of moments. I just found this and I wanted to read it for Jess Hooker because she is our cook here, among many other things, but she's a very fine cook. And during the breaks, we often talk about the artistry in the kitchen. This is a list of foods that are unusual by region that you may think are weird.

[Jess Hooker]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

The headline is Foods the rest of the world thinks are weird. Have you ever heard of Frogmore stew?

[Christy Lee]

No. What is that?

[Tom Griswold]

South Carolina. A one pot boil of shrimp, corn, sausage, and potatoes.

[Christy Lee]

Sounds good.

[Tom Griswold]

It sounds great.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, it does.

[Tom Griswold]

And what a cool name. Frogmore Stew.

[Jess Hooker]

Frogmore Stew.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

I've never heard of it.

[Josh Arnold]

Sounds like a classic boil.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah. Barbecue spaghetti.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

I can't get on board with that.

[Christy Lee]

What is barbecue spaghetti?

[Tom Griswold]

It's from Tennessee. Spaghetti, pulled pork, and barbecue sauce.

[Jeff Oskay]

Us.

[Josh Arnold]

I would try it.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Might be good.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

I've done poured pulled pork, Mac. Like on Mac and cheese.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, exactly.

[Ace Cosby]

I'm 100.

[Tom Griswold]

Of course. We were in Cincinnati yesterday. The. The home of spice chili with spaghetti and cheese. It's. You're not a fan?

[Jess Hooker]

No. It makes me angry to even think about the stuff they put in Cincinnati chili. I hate it.

[Tom Griswold]

I. I am a huge.

[Jess Hooker]

No, not my chili.

[Ace Cosby]

Yeah, I'm with you.

[Jess Hooker]

Keep it on my snickerdoodle. Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

We talked about this one before. Does anybody remember the cannibal sandwich? This is famous.

[Jess Hooker]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

And we got. We got a lot of email about this.

[Jess Hooker]

It's an uncooked ground beef sandwich.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. It's raw minced beef on bread with onions.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, they did it. Is it in Wisconsin?

[Jess Hooker]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

We got a lot of email from

[Jess Hooker]

people that say they do it as an appetizer, too, like with saltines, and you just scoop it right out of the. The. The Styrofoam.

[Josh Arnold]

I love it. I mean, I love steak tartar. So this sounds like it's right.

[Jess Hooker]

I want to try it, but I'm nervous. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I Assume that there's a protocol one follows to make sure that the.

[Josh Arnold]

Sure.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I. I don't know. Uncooked beef.

[Pat Godwin]

That's hard to talk afterwards when you have that. You can't mince your words.

[Josh Arnold]

Thank you, Mr. Paul Lynn.

[Christy Lee]

You're welcome.

[Tom Griswold]

You do it like the guy you did yesterday at this time. That was the baseball player, by the way. I don't know why that was. That may be. That may have been censored.

[Jess Hooker]

No, it's perfect.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, Pat, this is for you. Scrapple.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

I've never had it, but it's a Philadelphia thing.

[Tom Griswold]

A loaf with pork scraps and cornmeal, sliced and fried.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I've heard of that one.

[Tom Griswold]

I've heard of it, but I've never had it. Might be good.

[Jess Hooker]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

The Butter Burger.

[Christy Lee]

Wait a minute, Tom. Pork scraps. I don't know that you want to eat that well.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, it's. They're cooked

[Christy Lee]

well. Yeah, but if you think of pork scraps, you're not exactly well.

[Tom Griswold]

They grind them up for hot dogs. We've probably all downed enough anus to make a fire hose. If you look at what's in a hot dog, the Butter Burger. This is also Wisconsin of beet burger topped with or cooked in butter.

[Jess Hooker]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

Give me Culver's any day.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know how to pronounce this. Byrocks. B, I, E. Or maybe beer. Oh. Box pastry pockets filled with beef, cabbage and onions. That sounds great.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

The Hangtown fry.

[Josh Arnold]

What's that?

[Tom Griswold]

An omelette with bacon and oysters.

[Andre Berto]

Wow.

[Josh Arnold]

No kidding, man.

[Jess Hooker]

I love oysters. I don't know about in my omelette, though.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, now this one is really odd, and it's. The name is right there in it. It's spelled with a K. Kool icles. It's pickles soaked in Kool Aid and sugar.

[Jess Hooker]

Well, yeah, we did that here.

[Josh Arnold]

We did.

[Christy Lee]

We did.

[Jess Hooker]

We tasted it.

[Tom Griswold]

And I forget how that went.

[Jess Hooker]

None of us liked it.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. The West Virginia slaw dog. That's a hot dog with chili, coleslaw and onions.

[Josh Arnold]

Sounds awesome.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, I love coleslaw. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. The white clam pizza. A tomato free pizza with just clams, garlic, and cheese.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, that's.

[Josh Arnold]

That's good. I've had it.

[Christy Lee]

Good. I've had that, too.

[Tom Griswold]

How about a possum pie?

[Christy Lee]

Nope.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

It's a dessert.

[Andre Berto]

It's chocolate.

[Tom Griswold]

It's chocolate, cream cheese and pecan crust. That is probably fantastic.

[Christy Lee]

That does sound good. I thought it was usually a layer

[Jess Hooker]

of Chocolate underneath it. Like that's. That's the possum part, is that you don't know at the bottom that it's a layer of chocolate or peanut butter. It's something hiding in the bottom.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. This would be great. An elk burger. That's just a burger made with ground elk beef. That's in Miami. And this is a more recent ad to the list. Disco fries from New Jersey.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Fries with gravy and melted cheese.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, so good.

[Tom Griswold]

Is that like a poutine?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, very similar.

[Jess Hooker]

It's really. And on the east coast it's really common. Like you hit the diner after the bar and that's what people eat. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Tater tot hot dish from Minnesota. Casserole of meat, vegetables and tater tots.

[Christy Lee]

Yep. I make that.

[Josh Arnold]

That sounds good.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

The loco moco is Hawaiian rice topped with a hamburger patty, eggs and gravy.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, that's not that all these.

[Christy Lee]

Gravy's a big term though.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, it's a very.

[Christy Lee]

I want to know what kind of gravy.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Ace Cosby]

Does it have the hot brown on there?

[Tom Griswold]

The hot brown?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, that's in Kentucky.

[Tom Griswold]

It's very common.

[Josh Arnold]

I mean, what's that? Essentially an open faced turkey sandwich with cheese and gravy.

[Jess Hooker]

So it's like a Manhattan.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

The hot beef sundae from Iowa's mashed potatoes and beef arranged like an ice cream sundae.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Jess Hooker]

I've seen the savory sundae served a lot of ways.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. At weddings. I've seen the barbecue Sunday.

[Jeff Oskay]

It's fun.

[Josh Arnold]

It is fun.

[Tom Griswold]

And lastly, the akuta in Alaska. It's a meat, a mix of fat, berries and snow. Huh?

[Pat Godwin]

Yikes.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, now I thought by to get a little. Yeah, we have time for a quick request here. Getting away from food and moving to the beverage department. This is a absolute classic from a guy that was a good friend of this show for many, many years. It's Todd Snyder and of course, beer run.

[Andre Berto]

B double E double R U N Beer run B E All we need is a 10 and a fiver, A car and a key and a sober driver. B double E double R U N Biron. A couple of frat guys from Abilene drove out all night to see Robert Earl Keane at the K Pig, Swine and Soiree dance. They wore baseball caps and khaki pants. They wanted cigarettes, so to save a little money, they got one from this hippie that smelled kind of funny. And the next thing they knew, they were both really hungry and Pretty thirsty too B double E R R r u n beer run B double E R R R u n beer run all we need is a 10 and a fiver A car and a key and a sober driver B double E double R u n beer run Found a store with the sign said their beer was coldest so they sent in Brad cuz he looked the oldest he got a case of beer in a candy bar Walked over to where all them registers are Laid his fake ID on the countertop the clerk looked, he turned, he looked back up he stopped, he said, son, I'm not gonna call the cops But I'm gonna have to keep this card the guys both took it pretty hard

[Tom Griswold]

B double E double

[Andre Berto]

R U mirror B double E double R u n beer run oh, how happy we would be had we only brought a better fake ID on his B double E double R u n beer run they found this other old hippie named Sleepy John he claimed to be the one from the Robert Earl Keane song so they gave him all their cash he bought him some brew it was a beautiful day out in Santa Cruz they were feeling so good it should have been a crime the crowd was cool and the band was prime they made it back up front to their seats just in time so they could sing with all their friends they say the road goes on forever and the party never ends B double E double R u n beer run B double E double R u n beer run all we need is a 10 and a fiver A car and a key and a sober driver B E double R u N and beer.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, that is great. Now, we were talking about food and. And beer, and you mentioned the hot brown. Yes, and we'll. We'll probably get some good recipes for that. Coming up, just some unusual regional foods that people find might. Might find odd. I'm pat. Am I correct in saying. Yeah, grab your guitar. Did you do a something about. I'm trying. I could be wrong. Didn't you have a brown something about the sandwich?

[Pat Godwin]

The hot brown dish from Louisville? Yeah, I don't know if I did. Hot brown supper in the city Turkey, bacon, ham don't look pretty Lots of gravy, not a little bitty It's a favorite of the Louisville Sit down Gravy all around Slices of bread Large piece of turkey bigger than your head but at night your tummy aches Lay down that hot brown bakes Come on, come on Try to go all night Squeeze those cheeks real tight It's a bummer it ain't Pretty after supper in the city.

[Josh Arnold]

Hot brown.

[Pat Godwin]

Supper in the city. I think I do.

[Tom Griswold]

That's great. I knew there was something there. The hot brown. So it is essentially a Manhattan, Kentucky. So it's a turkey version of the Manhattan.

[Pat Godwin]

That's exactly right.

[Jess Hooker]

We should do them for the derby. Oh, I'll make some for him.

[Pat Godwin]

They're delicious.

[Tom Griswold]

Yum. Oh, the derby's just down the road.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

All right. Yeah. I was driving yesterday from Cincinnati. I noticed the trees are just kind of.

[Christy Lee]

They want to bud, don't they?

[Tom Griswold]

I'm coming. I'm coming. Wow. Okay. Well, when we come back, we have a couple of listeners that have informed us of even some more towns with crazy names. It's going to be hard to get weirder than Dick Shooter, Idaho. But we'll, we'll do what we'll do our best. Also, another surprise coming your way. But first, I want to talk to Christy Lee about her vehicle.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. If you're going to drive to one of those crazy cities with those funny names, you'll want to do it in style. How about in a Hyundai? They're having the Hyundai getaway sales event right now. You can get a wonderful deal. Great deals on popular models like the SUVs Santa Fe, Santa Fe Hybrid, the Tucson or of course, my favorite, the Tucson hybrid. Plus don't forget they have the Elantra, which is their very loaded, really pretty sedan, and then the Ioniq 5 or Ioniq 9, which are fully electric. And you don't have to worry about the gas prices. So get down to your local Hyundai dealer. You're going to get a deal you'll love. It's the Hyundai Getaway sales event and it's going on now. Check out HyundaiUSA.com for more details. That's Hyundai USA.com coming up.

[Tom Griswold]

We have a couple of nice letters from you, the listener. You can always reach us, Bob and tomobandtom.com and I haven't mentioned this. I should. We have the guys and ladies have been working on our website and it's a whole new website. It looks great and a whole new app. And I'll urge you to check out the website. We do have the pop up shop. It has popped up. It'll be there until Sunday evening. And we're still selling those T shirts that benefit Brave Gowns, the organization that makes little capes and stuff for kids in the hospital. Kind of fun. You can, by the way, we do have a link. You can make a direct donation to them or you can buy one of the shirts and we'll give them the money. Whatever works for you. Happy to do so. It's just a fun little thing. And again, we had so much fun yesterday. I want to say thanks to Lee's famous recipe chicken for putting us up yesterday. We had a great time at the beautiful Justice Smoke justice restaurant in Covington, Kentucky. And I had a chance to go down into the basement because the way we were set up, that was kind of the only bathroom we could get to.

[Christy Lee]

Careful.

[Tom Griswold]

And no, that, I mean, that is, I would like to take a video down there. It is. It's like you're walking through a different world.

[Ace Cosby]

It's.

[Tom Griswold]

You're in the catacombs.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

It's an old funky building and just beautiful old brick. That whole neighborhood is gorgeous. And I did not get a parking ticket this year.

[Christy Lee]

Yay. Good for you.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much. Thank you. I like the, the parking meters that take a credit card where you don't have to sign up and get a password and get a, get a semen stain from the governor. This would make it a lot easier. Okay. Thank you very much. We are returning to the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey, it's the Bob and Tom Show. We're live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Thank O'Reilly Auto Parts for all your car care needs. Get the parts and service you need fast from the professional parts people at O'Reilly Auto Parts. Christy Lee's at the news desk.

[Christy Lee]

Hello, Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

Pat Godwin's there.

[Pat Godwin]

Hey, Josh.

[Jeff Oskay]

Hi.

[Josh Arnold]

Jess Hooker.

[Jess Hooker]

Hello.

[Josh Arnold]

At the Originsouls.com sports desk, it's Jeff Oskay.

[Ace Cosby]

Howdy.

[Josh Arnold]

There's Ace Cosby. Hey, I am Josh Arnold. And there's Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

We were talking about unusual dishes or dishes associated with a certain, certain town or a certain state, et cetera, et cetera. And the hot brown came up and I want to do a little bit of homework. It sounds delicious. But I didn't realize this. It's not brown. I was envisioning some kind of like a gravy.

[Jess Hooker]

There's no brown gravy on a hot

[Tom Griswold]

brown down all the photographs here. It's named after the Brown Hotel.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

And the, instead of gravy, I don't even. How do you pronounce it?

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, it's bechamel.

[Tom Griswold]

So it, it looks like hollandaise. It's a yellowy.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah. It's a yolk.

[Josh Arnold]

Kind of cheesy looking.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

This looks great.

[Jess Hooker]

I had no idea.

[Tom Griswold]

Bacon and turkey.

[Jess Hooker]

Totally thought it was brown gravy, too.

[Ace Cosby]

Me, too.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. This is Manhattan.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. This is.

[Josh Arnold]

I was just called. That's stuff gravy, because I didn't. I'm. That's too fancy. Whatever Tom said.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know what it. I'm reading it. I've never heard of it.

[Jess Hooker]

Like Holland.

[Tom Griswold]

It says. Basically, it's a mor. Sauce. Basically a bennel and cheese. Yeah. This is out of my league, but it's. It looks fantastic. It looks. It looks like a hollandaise sauce.

[Jess Hooker]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Very, very tasty.

[Jess Hooker]

I'll have to do some homework about that rich sandwich.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah. It looks delightful. So. And associated with Kentucky, much like bourbon or.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Derby Pie, for example, and Mint Julep. Oh, and once again, the race just around the corner. I forgot. What. What did I promise? Oh, I had some letters I was just handed. I'm supposed to read these. Let's see now. Here we go. Oh, I see. We were talking about unusual town names. Like Dit was a Dick Shooter, Iowa. There is a Nutwood, Illinois. There's a Sugar Tit, Kentucky.

[Christy Lee]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, look, I didn't. Blame me.

[Jess Hooker]

Is that a bird?

[Tom Griswold]

There is.

[Christy Lee]

There's a titmouse.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, okay.

[Christy Lee]

Tufted Tit Mouse.

[Tom Griswold]

There's a Gayville, South Dakota.

[Ace Cosby]

Gayville.

[Andre Berto]

Hello.

[Tom Griswold]

There is a. I know there's a. Wait, hang on a second. There is a Homo Sasa.

[Josh Arnold]

Florida.

[Christy Lee]

Okay, okay, I didn't name these places, so you don't have to read them.

[Tom Griswold]

Almost outs of Florida. Not very popular with folks from Sugar Tit, funny enough.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, Sugar Said is a folk name for a baby pacifier.

[Jess Hooker]

What?

[Josh Arnold]

According to this, I remember that. You dip it in sugar.

[Ace Cosby]

Really?

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Ace Cosby]

That's crazy.

[Jess Hooker]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, I guess you could rub it on your boob.

[Josh Arnold]

I'll get rid of the old Sugar Tit. That'll shut her up crying all night with that cic.

[Christy Lee]

Okay, there's a Rough and Ready California. Wasn't that a cartoon?

[Tom Griswold]

Rough and Ready? The steady, they're always rough and ready. Even when the little. Something.

[Pat Godwin]

Something like that.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I could. I could kind of remember the jingle. Okay, Christy, what do you got over there at the news?

[Christy Lee]

California. You forgot that one.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, what?

[Christy Lee]

Placentia.

[Tom Griswold]

Placentia.

[Christy Lee]

Placenta. Placentia.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Christy Lee]

How did that town get the name?

[Jess Hooker]

I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

Someone must have given birth there, I guess. Okay, what have you got over there?

[Pat Godwin]

There's Spread Eagle, Wisconsin. That's a real town. I performed at.

[Christy Lee]

Did you really?

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, not kidding.

[Christy Lee]

We have some sad news this morning. Singer, songwriter Daryl Dash Cross, who teamed up, of course, with his childhood friend Jim Seals for 70s soft rock hits like Summer Breeze, Diamond Girl, Get Closer has died at the age of 87.

[Josh Arnold]

I thought he said we had some sad news.

[Christy Lee]

What? You don't like Seals and Crofts? What is wrong with you? You, I thought would be as it gets.

[Josh Arnold]

Typo negative. Yes, I know. Typo negative. Did.

[Tom Griswold]

That's Jimmy Seals. His brother is England. Dan England. Dan from England. Dan and John Fro.

[Christy Lee]

Jimmy Seals his brother or Dan Crush.

[Tom Griswold]

Jimmy Seals.

[Andre Berto]

He.

[Tom Griswold]

Jimmy died just a few years ago.

[Christy Lee]

But these guys met in high school. Played in various bands until they became a.

[Tom Griswold]

Didn't they?

[Christy Lee]

In the 60s.

[Tom Griswold]

Weren't. I'd have to look it up. Weren't they involved in the famous song Tequila?

[Christy Lee]

I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

I think they might have been. I'll. I'll dig it up.

[Ace Cosby]

They also invented the Easter seal. Not everyone knows.

[Josh Arnold]

Who knew? Yeah. Wow.

[Pat Godwin]

I opened for these guys back in the mid-80s.

[Christy Lee]

Did you really?

[Pat Godwin]

I got fired though.

[Christy Lee]

Why?

[Pat Godwin]

Because I introduced them as arts and crafts. I'll be here all week. Enjoy the hot brown.

[Tom Griswold]

What else you got?

[Christy Lee]

I doubt that Seals and Crofts was playing when a guy in Washington state was arrested for the 98th time.

[Josh Arnold]

98.

[Christy Lee]

Yes. KIRO reports his most recent run in Josh with the law. He led officers on a high speed chase through Olympia after stealing thousands of dollars worth of merchandise from multiple stores. After talking to the man and taking him into custody, they found he had a custom bong device built into the dash of his truck. So he could comfortably smoke drugs while driving.

[Ace Cosby]

I smoke drugs.

[Tom Griswold]

This is how the police turn at smoking drugs.

[Christy Lee]

He was charged with dui, eluding police and possession of narcotics. Yes, he could smoke his bong while driving.

[Ace Cosby]

Boy, oh boy.

[Tom Griswold]

Now I know. I did see this. I tried to find a picture. I wanted to see what this thing looked like.

[Christy Lee]

I want to see it. They don't show.

[Tom Griswold]

No, they don't. They show the car.

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Jess Hooker]

They don't want to give anybody ideas.

[Josh Arnold]

That's amazing.

[Tom Griswold]

But he's been arrested 98 times. Isn't that two more? He gets a free sandwich.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes. The old Washington Century Club.

[Christy Lee]

What happened to three strikes and you're out?

[Tom Griswold]

I assume these are probably all for very minor arrest. But the guy's driving.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Wouldn't you? Maybe. I assume they're going to take away his license.

[Ace Cosby]

But you're assuming he had a license.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm a rule follower. The question is, what's more distracting? Having an operable bong built into your dashboard or texting while driving. What do you think?

[Josh Arnold]

Well, the bong gets you impaired.

[Ace Cosby]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

But at least you don't have to look down if it's built into the door, into the dash.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but it's.

[Christy Lee]

Keep your eyes on the road.

[Josh Arnold]

I mean, it's sort of like saying, what's better, Having a Big Gulp full of vodka in your thing with a long straw so you don't have to look down.

[Tom Griswold]

Wait a minute, you're thinking.

[Christy Lee]

Or.

[Tom Griswold]

Or an IV bag on that handle. That handle in your car. A buddy of mine got a substantial ticket two weeks ago. It depends on what state you're in for this to happen. It happened to him. He was looking at his phone.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Cop drove by, pulled him over.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I had no idea.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

I had a cop come up on side of me. I was driving through Tennessee, and it was. He just looked at me and he went.

[Christy Lee]

It.

[Jess Hooker]

Put your phone down and made the. Like, the motion. And I was like, okay, I gotta go.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah. So luckily he didn't pull me over. But I got a. I got a warning.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Usually they'll have signs up.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Headset.

[Tom Griswold]

If they have signs here. I never seen them, so I haven't seen them here.

[Jess Hooker]

But it is illegal.

[Ace Cosby]

There's states where they have the cameras to catch that.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Ace Cosby]

Like coming under a br. You're over the bridge, or you're coming under the bridge. It catches you right in the.

[Tom Griswold]

Right there at Hitler Avenue. Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Are you on your phone while you're driving?

[Tom Griswold]

Never.

[Jess Hooker]

He's always.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I have a mind. It's on a speaker. Of course, if I'm talking on it, it's honest, whatever you call it.

[Ace Cosby]

I drove next to Tom two opening days ago, or years ago. Next to him on the highway for 15 miles. Like, directly next to him, staring at him. And because he was looking at his phone, he had no idea I was next to him.

[Jess Hooker]

All four of us were in the car like this, and he didn't see.

[Tom Griswold]

Why would I be looking over there?

[Josh Arnold]

He was looking at his phone.

[Ace Cosby]

Yeah, my phone's down here. Why would I look?

[Pat Godwin]

You're a guy, he's an outlaw.

[Josh Arnold]

What could you possibly.

[Pat Godwin]

He's looking for a Starbucks.

[Josh Arnold]

Unless you're looking for your favorite Pantera song.

[Tom Griswold]

By the way, a special hello to the Starbucks off of Interstate 74. Very, very nice. I certainly appreciate.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, they recognize there's more than one. Isn't that sweet?

[Tom Griswold]

That's the one near whatever it is.

[Ace Cosby]

They only tore up one of them.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Good.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah. Apologize.

[Christy Lee]

An Arizona family, speaking of that, has been displaced from their home after raw sewage backed up into their apartment. Candace Thompson told kpnx, water started pouring out of a hole in their laundry closet and filled their apartment in Phoenix.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, it's just one water.

[Christy Lee]

Well, the water changed color soon thereafter. It did. Nelson Thompson said, poopy, toilet tissue coming out like a fountain of youth.

[Tom Griswold]

Fountain of what?

[Jess Hooker]

Called it.

[Christy Lee]

He said it's like a fountain of. This is his quote. Poop, pee, toilet tissue coming out like a fountain of youth, but it's a fountain of feces.

[Tom Griswold]

Wasn't that the third album, Fountain of Feces by Bo Kim?

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Christy Lee]

The family said all of their belongings are now contaminated. Mr. Thompson told the news station a team is working to repair and sanitize the home, but they do not feel safe returning.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, man.

[Tom Griswold]

So the poop hit the fan and the couch.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And. And a chair and the refrigerator. That would be really bad.

[Christy Lee]

I had something similar happen in an old house I owned in the basement, but it was like a dirt floor basement, you know, so it wasn't. Nothing got contaminated, but.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, it was awful.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Well, my fault was a sewer problem.

[Tom Griswold]

I had an. Yeah, I had a sewage thing once that was. Yeah, I was really upset. They. I called the carpet cleaning people. They came over, they did some kind of a test, and they said, there's too much E. Coli in this carpet. We can't clean it.

[Christy Lee]

Oh.

[Tom Griswold]

So I had to take the carpeting out.

[Christy Lee]

Really?

[Tom Griswold]

Yep.

[Christy Lee]

I didn't know that was a thing.

[Tom Griswold]

I was an idiot. I should have just called somebody else.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know.

[Christy Lee]

I knew of all people.

[Jess Hooker]

People.

[Christy Lee]

I would think that wouldn't even have been.

[Josh Arnold]

I know that it's a financial hit, but if you can do it, I would go, hey, I'm getting rid of this carpet.

[Jess Hooker]

Take the subfloors too.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Sanitize it all.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. I can't imagine you would live in a house that.

[Tom Griswold]

I wasn't living there. Why would I Here. Sam was living there. No, I mean, couldn't they. I mean, steam it out? I mean.

[Jess Hooker]

No, no, no. You're telling me that if something happened on a rug, you wouldn't just throw the rug away instead of having it.

[Tom Griswold]

Only place in the house that. I don't approve of wall to wall carpeting, as you know.

[Christy Lee]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

But it was. It was down in the basement. Never mind.

[Christy Lee]

Don't approve.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I. That's exactly why, as a longtime dog owner.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I.

[Jess Hooker]

Dogs will find the carpeted area and

[Christy Lee]

they will stain it. I have that issue right now.

[Tom Griswold]

I have that little mini steamer thing. I'm a pro with that thing.

[Christy Lee]

So am I. But it still doesn't take stains out of your carpet in some instances, especially if turmeric is in your dog food.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, that's. Turmeric doesn't come out of much.

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Pat Godwin]

Why are your dog Indian food?

[Christy Lee]

No, it's anti inflammatory.

[Tom Griswold]

I didn't know that.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah, yeah. That dog food I recommended for you, that was. That was.

[Tom Griswold]

I've used. That's good stuff. I'm using it.

[Christy Lee]

I like it.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much.

[Josh Arnold]

Nancy's Chow.

[Christy Lee]

A group of farmers.

[Tom Griswold]

Hippie. Nancy's Chow Down Vegan with extra beef. It's kind of. It's confusing, that title of that stuff. Extra liver Vegan. I'm not sure what it's called.

[Christy Lee]

A group of farmers in India are trying to protect their crops from monkeys. This is so funny. By wearing bear costumes.

[Jess Hooker]

This is funny.

[Christy Lee]

According to the Times, farmers in the Samba hall district have resorted to dressing up as bears and growling at the primates after trying everything else, from running after them with brooms to banging with drums and pans. Not only are the monkeys eating crops, but they are ransacking homes and even damaging infrastructure. The new deterrent appears to be working as the very site of the costumes sends the monkeys running.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, all right.

[Christy Lee]

I ran into this on vacation. Oh, my God.

[Josh Arnold]

The guy's just walking upright like he's a dude. He's not pretending to be a bear at all.

[Tom Griswold]

It's a really bad bear costume.

[Josh Arnold]

I mean, horrible. The face is ridiculous looking.

[Christy Lee]

That's what's scaring them.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, that would scare me.

[Ace Cosby]

Yeah, that would run me off.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Where is this again?

[Christy Lee]

In India?

[Tom Griswold]

Wild monkeys.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

And remember in the Shining when they look down into the doorway of that one hotel room and that guy's on his knees and the other dude is sitting in the bed.

[Tom Griswold]

Bed.

[Josh Arnold]

In a suit like that. So that's what that reminds me of when I was.

[Tom Griswold]

You had to be a bear Crow, I guess technically.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. When I was in the Caribbean. They have wild monkeys all over. They have monkeys and there were dogs in all the farm fields. And I was like, why are there dogs in your farm fields? To scare the monkeys off. They eat all the crops. Huh.

[Tom Griswold]

Makes sense. Weren't you just saying something about the original Bigfoot video? There's a documentary about it. Speaking.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, coming out. Yeah. I haven't seen it. It's supposed to be coming out about they're debunking the Patterson Gimlin video.

[Tom Griswold]

That famous, that's the famous.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Video of him in the dry river bed kind of thing.

[Tom Griswold]

And that's a, that's a dude in a suit.

[Josh Arnold]

That's what this documentary claims. But we don't know what their angle is. Right.

[Tom Griswold]

The truth, it's hard to say.

[Josh Arnold]

We'll have to want to watch it and decide for yourself.

[Tom Griswold]

I see. I'm going to give you the truth about home security. See what I did there?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I saw Simplisafe. Our friends at Simplisafe, they've been doing it for a long time and they're getting better. They're still winning all the awards, of course. In fact, Simplisafe home security, number one in customer service. And these days a lot of customer service and a lot of different businesses. Not great, we all know that. But number one in customer service according to Newsweek and USA Today, that's Simplisafe also, by the way, way voted the best home security system for this year by U.S. news and World Report. SimpliSafe comes with a 60 day satisfaction guarantee or your money back. No long term contracts, no cancellation fees. And Simplisafe has stepped up into the world of AI, artificial intelligence because they've got AI powered cameras that can track, say there's someone lurking outside your house. The AI cameras detect that and the monitoring folks can alert you and the police, et cetera, et cetera. They can even come over a speaker and say, hey, get out of here. We see you there, et cetera, et cetera. So they really are moving forward quickly. And by the way, simply safe, many of those systems can be installed just simply by you. So I know the first one, the first time we heard about a chick had just installed one at his house and I know he's actually moved that system twice. Get the details from the pros. It's simply safe. There's a special thing going on right now. 50% off. 50% off. For Bob and Tom show listeners, visit simplisafetom.com maybe you've just moved somewhere. Want to get a proper security system put in? Don't forget the smoke detectors and carbon monoxide detectors, et cetera, et cetera. And get the alarm set up the way you need it. With simply safe simplisafetom.com there's no safe like Simplisafe. We are coming right Back to the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Andre Berto]

Just Gotta get a hold of us. Call, text or email. Get all the contact contact information you [e-mail] this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, hello, it's the Bob and Tom Show. We're live from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Christy Lee's at the news desk.

[Christy Lee]

Hello.

[Josh Arnold]

Matt Godwin's there.

[Pat Godwin]

Hey, Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

There's Jess hooker [e-mail] sports desk. It's Jeff Oscar.

[Ace Cosby]

Hello, sir.

[Josh Arnold]

Ace Cosby. Hey, I am Josh Arnold, and there is Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Got a letter here regarding yesterday's show. We had a great time. We were at a beautiful spot. I can't. I just wish I could have spent the whole day hanging out there in Covington, Kentucky. Just, it's. You feel like you're just this. All these beautiful old buildings. We were at Smoke justice, which I know it sounds like a John Wayne Western, but it's a beautiful bar and restaurant. And last year, there was an occurrence there during our broadcast in which Ms. Hooker had an encounter with a bartender.

[Jeff Oskay]

I did.

[Tom Griswold]

Bartenders.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

This letter essentially says, did you hook up with the bartender again?

[Jess Hooker]

Right. Last year was very organic, guys. I mean, yeah, you know, it's six o' clock in the morning, shots hitting on lesbians. That has to happen organically. I recreate that.

[Ace Cosby]

Exactly.

[Jess Hooker]

But there was a new cute little bartender there this year. She was a doll. And I walked up to her and I was asking her for our breakfast burritos, and they took really great care of us yesterday. They were awesome. Awesome. And she said, hey, by the way, the bartender from last year told me that there's some creepy old lady that might hit on me on the air today. Like. And I was. I looked at her and I was like, yeah, that creepy old lady isn't here this year.

[Christy Lee]

Don't worry.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I see.

[Jess Hooker]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, good. Good to know.

[Ace Cosby]

Yeah. This year, she had a creepy old man hit on her. This guy. She was gorgeous.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I see.

[Jess Hooker]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

I didn't realize.

[Christy Lee]

She was very nice.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, she was sweet and very handsome. Male bartender, too.

[Christy Lee]

Yes, he was.

[Jess Hooker]

He was.

[Ace Cosby]

He wasn't much of a kisser, though.

[Christy Lee]

No. No tongue.

[Ace Cosby]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

But I think all that work shaking those drinks gives him a certain, you know.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah, certain.

[Tom Griswold]

Genesee Quad bathroom. Let's see now. Oh, I know we were talking about food, and I found this. And if you haven't. Should we do this as a question, Christy Lee?

[Christy Lee]

Sure.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Why don't you direct the.

[Christy Lee]

What story are you talking about?

[Tom Griswold]

The survey. The survey. This is A group called. There's a website. I'm sorry, called nuts.com.

[Christy Lee]

oh.

[Tom Griswold]

And it's about the, you know, peanuts, et cetera, et cetera.

[Christy Lee]

I thought we did. Maybe we did talk about this. About the most popular nut. Nuts.

[Tom Griswold]

You remember.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I do remember.

[Pat Godwin]

Cashews.

[Ace Cosby]

No, it has to be D's.

[Josh Arnold]

Those are popular.

[Ace Cosby]

Yeah, I hear about them.

[Tom Griswold]

They weren't. They weren't popular with the bartender yesterday.

[Christy Lee]

Shoes are America's favorite.

[Tom Griswold]

I understand in the back of Jason's new car, you really gave him a workout.

[Christy Lee]

All right. The Northeast is.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, Jason's got a new car. He's. He's so excited about it. Wouldn't let anybody eat anything in it.

[Christy Lee]

Now, wait a minute. Offered not to eat. Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

He was being a polite.

[Tom Griswold]

Because you didn't want to have to hitchhike home.

[Ace Cosby]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

You can eat just on the side of the road.

[Christy Lee]

And according to the poll, the Northeast is the most evenly split region in the country, with cashews and peanuts tied as the favorite.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh.

[Christy Lee]

Southeasterners are loyal, of course, to their Georgia grown pecans or pecans, however you say it.

[Tom Griswold]

Those are peanuts, aren't they?

[Christy Lee]

Pecans.

[Tom Griswold]

Georgia peanuts. Right.

[Christy Lee]

No, Pecans are different than.

[Tom Griswold]

You say pecan or pecans.

[Jess Hooker]

Pecan.

[Ace Cosby]

Pecan.

[Josh Arnold]

Unless it's a pecan sandy.

[Jess Hooker]

Oh, okay.

[Josh Arnold]

That's when I say pecan.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, that's.

[Christy Lee]

I say pecan.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Otherwise, no is pecan sandy. A dancer at the strip club you

[Josh Arnold]

used to go to, she. Well, before she lost the left leg, but yeah,

[Christy Lee]

the Southwest is the strongest.

[Ace Cosby]

Now she works the door.

[Christy Lee]

I'm surprised by this. The Southwest is the strongest peanut region in America. The Southwest. I don't think of peanuts when I think of the Southwest.

[Tom Griswold]

I had pistachios in my bracket. How did I do?

[Christy Lee]

Do I think of pin nuts, but they come from a pine tree? I don't know if that's considered. The Midwest is the only region where pistachios are at the top of the heap.

[Josh Arnold]

Those are delicious.

[Christy Lee]

And then the west, we can all probably guess this one because we're on in a big. The state of California. Almonds. That's right.

[Tom Griswold]

I love them all.

[Christy Lee]

Dominate.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I do, too. I do love them all. I love the mixed nuts I was talking to. I had had some pretty major heart surgery few years back, and God bless everybody that helped out. I was the guy that had a rough time on the. On the table there, but they fixed me all up. But I went back there to do a little thing. I wanted to give A gift to some of the staff people. And the assistant to the brilliant surgeon said oh yeah, he's in there all day today. He's doing three major surgeries. How do these guys. How does he eat?

[Josh Arnold]

Heat.

[Tom Griswold]

And she goes oh, he just has a handful of nuts every few. Literally a few. Every few hours goes in there because although all the surgeons tend to do that.

[Christy Lee]

Well, he washes his hands between handfuls.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, sorry. I got salt, I got salt on your aorta. Of course they.

[Josh Arnold]

The good news is you're alive. I dropped a filbert in your chest.

[Tom Griswold]

So. Yeah. And then I've been trying to eat as many as I can. I'm surprised that they were able to get nuts dot com.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Because in the early days of this there were. I know a guy that made a fortune.

[Christy Lee]

So do I.

[Tom Griswold]

In the early days of the Internet.

[Jess Hooker]

No.

[Christy Lee]

Buying all the domain names. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Cornering all these domain names and you know they probably had to buy nuts dot com, you know from some 300 pound booger eating sitting in his parents basement. I got nuts dot com, you know.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, yeah. Insight.

[Tom Griswold]

But he's still a booger reading.

[Jess Hooker]

Remember he's a rich one.

[Ace Cosby]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

But he doesn't enjoy the sunset as much as

[Christy Lee]

your mind really goes on.

[Tom Griswold]

So what's your favorite nut? Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

Ah man, my fave favorite all time Gary Busey. This is really tough. Yeah, yeah. Maybe Margot Kidder.

[Tom Griswold]

That'd be a good nuttiest. Off the deep end Hollywood movie stars. There have been so many of them. Well what do we have to end our show real quick?

[Christy Lee]

The Oscars are leaving Hollywood. Don't know if you heard this. The Dolby Theater in Hollywood that was actually built and developed by the Academy of Motion Pictures like for the ceremony. Yes. That's not gonna happen anymore. They're moving to la to the Peacock Theater. Nine miles away.

[Tom Griswold]

They're also going to Netflix Y and that.

[Christy Lee]

Well the YouTube they're not.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. Are you?

[Christy Lee]

And so this is going to happen the year that they go to YouTube. So it'll happen in 2020.

[Josh Arnold]

So not on broadcast television.

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Jess Hooker]

Wow.

[Christy Lee]

YouTube.

[Josh Arnold]

And then what else easier for me not to watch?

[Tom Griswold]

Was it the Yankee. The Yankee game. What is today? Wednesday night?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

That was strictly on Netflix.

[Jess Hooker]

Yes, yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh yeah. That's going to be. You're going to start seeing all that stuff. Start. But I just get confused. I can't remember if someone's. I'll say it to someone. I'm watching the Pit and they'll. What channel is that on? The guy I don't remember anymore.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, it's hard.

[Tom Griswold]

Just, it's just confusing. But yeah, all this stuff is going to be dancing around in various spots. But we certainly appreciate you dancing around with our show today. Yes. And again again yesterday. Great time. Thanks to everybody from our friends at Fox92.5 in Cincinnati. They were all great. And Lee's famous recipe chicken. I'm waiting. I'm waiting. They keep promising a special edition breakfast and smoke justice. Great folks and everybody who came. And lastly, the Pop Up Shop is going to be coming down Sunday night. So if you get a chance, you can buy one of those cool shirts. And we're donating the money, of course, to a great little charity called Brave Gowns that makes superhero outfits for kids that are in the hospital. So it's kind of fun. And by the way, if you don't want to shirt church, you can make a direct donation to them just by going to our website. We've got a link to theirs if it's something you think is fun and interesting and cool for the kids. These are the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios and this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Andre Berto]

Thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom show this morning even though we're not too much to look at. You can also watch the show on our YouTube channel.

[Christy Lee]

Hey, sorry to interrupt your playlist, but this is better than music. It's free stuff. Download TikTok Tok search, slash free and share the link to get items for free, start slashing now.