The BOB & TOM Show - March 5, 2026

Summary

The BOB & TOM Show – March 5, 2026

Episode Summary & Key Moments

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Main Theme Overview

This episode of The BOB & TOM Show weaves together the show's signature blend of comedy, offbeat conversations, listener letters, nostalgia-laced discussions, and group banter. Highlights include deep dives into breakfast cereal history, hilarious stories about childhood traditions, discussions of odd news (from runaway bowling balls to app-powered penile implant previews), memorable live music from Pat Godwin, and guest appearances from comedian Kelly Collette and comedy segment contributors Al Jackson and Ali Breen.

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Episode Highlights & Key Discussion Points

1. Cereal Nostalgia, History, and Culture

• Nostalgic Stories: The crew, led by Josh Arnold, share memories about running out of cereal and milk at the same time, sparking an extended segment on cereal habits and preferences. (05:05–12:00)
• Oldest Cereals: They humorously quiz each other on the oldest cereals ever made, delving into Grape Nuts, Corn Flakes (and Kellogg’s eccentric “anti-masturbation campaign”), Shredded Wheat, and more. (07:31–10:20)
• Cereal Prizes: Segment explores the nostalgic value (and collector’s worth) of cereal box prizes, like rings and record singles on the box backs (50:05–54:10). The hosts reminisce about fighting siblings for prizes and their house rules for who got to claim the toy.
• Notable Quote:

  “Do you guys remember peeling a record off a cereal box? That’s how I got The Fifth Dimension and Neil Diamond!”
  — Christy Lee (52:20)

2. Listener Letters & From-the-Fan Humor

• Sleep Number Bed Stories: Tom discusses co-sleeping with his girlfriend, daughter, and dog, and the various places pets and kids end up sleeping in his house. (19:43–20:28)
• Birds, Owls, and Toaster Radios: Fans write in about birds crashing into houses and mysterious AM radio signals coming through appliances. (24:57–27:34)
• Dear B&T Show: A parade of tongue-in-cheek letters launches ribbing about ugly shirts, guitar picks causing lawsuits, eating roadkill, and the etiquette of self-checkout lanes. (23:23; 27:40–28:29)

3. Odd News and Comedy Topics

• Trapeze Diarrhea Urban Legend: The hosts debunk an internet rumor about a trapeze artist accidentally “showering” audience members. This launches a mini-song parody. (31:22–32:38)

  “He floats through the air with the greatest of ease... the daring young man with the flying feces.”
  — Pat Godwin (32:28)

• Minor League Team Rebrands as ‘Dive Bars’: The panel delights in plans for the “Lake Country Dockhounds” (Wisconsin) to rebrand as the “Dive Bars”—complete with a new mascot, Bart Tabs, and wild merchandise. (75:11–77:17; 82:07–83:01)
• Bowling Ball Bandit: Color commentary on a story about a professional bowler’s 17 bowling balls being stolen from his porch. (107:40–108:46)

4. Personal Anecdotes and Classic BOB & TOM Group Banter

• Pill Caddy Competition: A hilarious contest about who has the best/most elaborate pill boxes erupts. (37:43–38:11)

  “I have a Batman pill caddy. Checkmate.”
  — Chick McGee (38:08)

• Pet & Family Life: Tom and Christy confess to elaborate pet and child sleeping arrangements; Josh opens up about his “lean Christmases” with “missing” cereal box toys later reappearing as holiday gifts. (55:43–57:26)

  “My mom would dig the toys out of the cereal boxes as soon as we bought them, then months later, they’d show up in our stockings on Christmas morning!”
  — Josh Arnold (56:29)

• Music & Pop Culture: The cast riff on famous musicians (James Doohan/Scotty, Jerry Garcia, the Def Leppard drummer) with missing fingers, and debate the worst pop song to ever drive to. (41:00–43:03; 97:35–98:18)

5. Guest Segment: Comedian Kelly Collette

• Introduction & Personal Life: Kelly discusses her stage name, her experience working for the Cincinnati Reds (including time spent as a mascot), and her adventures teaching stand-up comedy. (88:49–90:05; 102:39–103:33)

  “I was on the Rally Pack—that’s the people that shoot the T-shirts off the dugouts. … I also gave Pete Rose his Hall of Fame jacket.”
  — Kelly Collette (103:53–112:08)

• Comedy Life & Relationships: The panel and Collette swap stories of dating, stand-up class dynamics, and etiquette around leaving toiletries at a boyfriend’s apartment. (112:15–114:59)
• Dog Adoption & Travel: Kelly shares her love for adopting senior dachshunds and the challenges of traveling with pets as a comedian. (163:29–165:06)

6. Special Guests & Offbeat Comedy

• Al Jackson “Street Lingo” Segment: Al quizzes the cast (especially Tom) on modern slang, such as “baddie” and “that’s a body,” leading to endearingly awkward (and educational) exchanges. (139:44–143:10)
• Ali Breen’s ‘Sexy Time’ Letters: Ali fields real listener stories about unusual fetishes (golden showers), relationship dilemmas (witnessing a friend’s spouse with another woman), and public displays of affection. (146:43–155:46)

  “I’d rather pee on a guy than hold his hands.”
  — Kelly Collette (152:58)

• HimPlant App Discussion: Christy reveals the existence of a penis enhancement visualizer app. The group brainstorms marketing ideas, brings up the bacon-wrapped implant, and riff on digital glamour shots for genitalia. (155:38–158:25)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On cereal trivia and childhood nostalgia:

  “Every kid thought, oh, my God, I’m gonna get a pet monkey. This is going to be great. … [Sea Monkeys] were brine shrimp eggs!” — Tom Griswold & Christy Lee (54:10)

• On pill caddies:

  “For me, a good day is when all the pills fall out of the caddy, and none of the other little doors pop open.”
  — Tom Griswold (39:01)

• On childhood Christmases:

  “The saddest was the year leading up to Christmas when we thought we were the most unlucky children on the planet—every box of cereal forgot to put the toy… Then we found out why.”
  — Josh Arnold (56:44)

• On weird internet rumors:

  “If you run across this trapeze artist poop story—fake! Did not happen. I’m a big trapeze fan!”
  — Tom Griswold (32:44)

• On the “HimPlant App”:

  “This would be like a glamour shot for your [genitals]. I want mine standing on a train track like in my senior picture.”
  — Josh Arnold (157:59)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• Cereal & Nostalgia:

  • Crispix & cereal habits: 05:05–07:14
  • Oldest cereal trivia & invented Corn Flakes: 07:31–10:20
  • Collectibles, cereal box prizes: 50:05–54:10

• Pill caddy banter: 37:43–39:41

• Listener letters & outrage: 19:43–28:29

• Urban legends & song parodies: 31:22–32:38

• Pet/child sleep stories: 19:43–20:28, 163:29–165:06

• Minor league “Dive Bars” story: 75:11–77:17; 82:07–83:01

• Al Jackson’s pop culture slang quiz: 139:44–143:10

• Sexy Time (Ali Breen): 146:54–155:46

• HimPlant App discussion: 155:38–158:25

• Kelly Collette’s Reds/memorabilia/maskot stories: 103:53–112:08

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Final Thoughts & Tone

The episode is upbeat, nostalgic, self-deprecating, and filled with chemistry between cast and guests. There’s a comfort in their “inside joke” callbacks and the show’s signature willingness to make fun of themselves, each other, and the world around them. Great for long-time listeners, this episode is jam-packed with midwestern flavor, pop culture deep cuts, real-life absurdity, and the warm, crackling banter that defines BOB & TOM.

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For listeners who missed this episode:

You’ll feel right at home. Pour some cereal, check your pill caddy, and get ready to laugh at tales of lost toys, odd news, relationship woes, and the joys and headaches of everyday life—BOB & TOM style.

Transcript

[Tom Griswold]

I get so many headaches every month.

[Kelly Collette]

It could be chronic migraine, 15 or

[Christy Lee]

more headache days a month, each lasting four hours or more.

[Tom Griswold]

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[Chick McGee]

Why wait? Ask your doctor, visit botoxchronicmigraine.com or call

[Kelly Collette]

1-844botox to learn more.

[Tom Griswold]

Dripping in gold that's cool. Dripping in Velveeta's supremely creamy golden cheesiness, that's respect. Elevate your drip with Velveeta's range of outrageously delicious dips and dishes, shells, cheese, melty blocks and heat and eat queso that go all in on indulgence. Flex on your fam with a creamy cheesy masterpiece and go all in on what you love with Velveeta. Respect the drip and satisfy your cravings. Bring home the drip with Velveeta.

[Chick McGee]

It's the Bob and Tom Show.

[Pat Godwin]

You should have seen me last night when I I fell down laughing and I stumbled down a flight of metal

[Tom Griswold]

st.

[Pat Godwin]

Crashing through the window at the VFW hall Tumbled over a pile of metal chairs Then I cussed out my girlfriend tried to feel up her mama I wrecked my car I think I bruised my spine oh, you ought to go with me when I go out drinking Always have myself a real good

[Christy Lee]

time I got drunk and stole this

[Pat Godwin]

boat out of the Edgewater Water yacht club doing 90 miles an hour up to the bay I sank her out by Buckeye Point Walked on into town Tore up someone's flowers on my way Then I barged into the cruise nest and I threw up on a rug I slapped that hostess on her bit

[Josh Arnold]

behind

[Pat Godwin]

oh, you ought to go with me when I go out drinking Always have myself Real good time I talk dirty to the waitress and I never ever leave her no tip. I leave her all my roaches in the guacamole. You want to go with me When I go out drinking? Always have myself a real good time so I'm going out tonight and I'm going to try on a good one. Does anybody here want to go out drinking with me?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Take you to this biker bar where we can kick some ass in a gay bar.

[Chick McGee]

We'll get our drinks for free.

[Pat Godwin]

We'll do shooters of tequila and a case of beer a piece. We'll wash it down with a gallon of cheap island wine. I know you ought to go with me One time I go out drinking Always have myself a real good time I like to shout out loud and moon the crowd when I'm dancing on the bars Go out in the parking lot Piss on all the cars.

[Tom Griswold]

Give me that wine.

[Pat Godwin]

Always have myself a real good time I'm feeling very fine Always have myself a real good time.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Hello, from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. It's. It's the Bob and Tom Show.

[Pat Godwin]

There they are.

[Chick McGee]

There's Christy Lee at the news desk.

[Al Jackson]

Hello.

[Chick McGee]

There's Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hey, Chick.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, hey, hey. Hello, Josh Arnold. Hello.

[Josh Arnold]

It's going to be a great day. I had one of those omens this morning, and I'll tell you why. Yes, I think you'll appreciate it, Tom.

[Chick McGee]

Cannot wait. There's Cosby.

[Josh Arnold]

Hello,

[Chick McGee]

I'm Chick McGee. And hello, Tom Griswold.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello, Chick McGee at the orangeinsols.com sports desk.

[Chick McGee]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

Nice to see you today, Josh. The omen, please.

[Josh Arnold]

You know those moments in life. Hey, that'll, let's say, back when we were all carrying cash and everything. That'll be 276. You know what? I think I've got it. You reach in your pocket, you pull out the change. My gosh, if it isn't 76 cents.

[Tom Griswold]

Boom.

[Josh Arnold]

This morning.

[Chick McGee]

There's no explaining that.

[Josh Arnold]

So, I've been enjoying some Crispix this week.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

Don't get too jealous, okay?

[Chick McGee]

I believe his Crispix is flavor times two or something.

[Josh Arnold]

That's exactly right. You got corn on one side, rice on the other.

[Chick McGee]

It's amazing.

[Tom Griswold]

How do they do it?

[Chick McGee]

I don't know.

[Josh Arnold]

It's a modern marvel. And it's easily one of my favorite cereals.

[Christy Lee]

I agree.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, today I had the last bowl.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, no.

[Josh Arnold]

And that last bowl coincided perfectly with the milk. With the last bit of milk.

[Chick McGee]

That is amazing.

[Tom Griswold]

The sign of a great Day you need to go by exactly what happened to Lindbergh when he took off. Well, Chris picks matches the milk.

[Chick McGee]

I'm going, what kind of cereal did they have on Lindbergh is like here's more gruel. And now gruel with raisins.

[Josh Arnold]

And I mean it was perfect. I didn't have to. It wasn't short of milk. I didn't have to overflow it because I wanted. I wanted get rid of the milk. It was just.

[Tom Griswold]

And for old time's sake. Did you put the empty milk back in the fridge?

[Josh Arnold]

Of course.

[Tom Griswold]

Like when you were a kid.

[Josh Arnold]

And I'm sure my mom will call me later and yell at me.

[Tom Griswold]

Just the other day I reached three in the morning. Well, I'm glad I've got a region. It's empty.

[Josh Arnold]

What you guys like the last bowl of cereal? When you get the broken pieces of cereal that kind of shredded. I kind of like those bits.

[Christy Lee]

Do you really?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, but see on some cereal it just has turned to dust.

[Christy Lee]

Right.

[Chick McGee]

I'm a fan of the milk. I run out of cereal, so I put cereal in and then I got too much cereal. I put milk in.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Sometimes it takes eight, eight to nine days to eat breakfast. But it's worth it.

[Tom Griswold]

Vicious cycle.

[Christy Lee]

The Shredded Wheat is one that gets all crumbly at the bottom.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh no. Yeah, like Grape Nuts. It turns into like cremaines. There are not appealing.

[Chick McGee]

There are other cereals available. Why do you. Why do you eat Shredded Wheat?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, it's lovely. I. What was the first boxed cereal?

[Christy Lee]

Corn Flakes. Wasn't you think?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, Cornflakes was invented by a guy that. That was the guy that wanted. He had an anti masturbation campaign and remember this Kellogg?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I thought. Yeah, but I thought that was. I always thought that was the first one.

[Chick McGee]

That's a crazy hill to die on. Yeah. No more masturbation.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. You okay.

[Josh Arnold]

I got a lister of the 10 oldest cereals ever created. And let's see if. I just want to see if we're going to oldest and new. Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Is it mucilicks in there or it's

[Josh Arnold]

just twigs and branches?

[Christy Lee]

Do you count that as a cereal?

[Tom Griswold]

Oatmeal.

[Josh Arnold]

Now some of these are not available still. So don't yell at me when we don't know what it is.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, come on.

[Josh Arnold]

It's just how this list is. Okay, number 10. Force.

[Tom Griswold]

Never heard of it. Force.

[Chick McGee]

A guy with a gun makes you.

[Josh Arnold]

And a popular mascot.

[Tom Griswold]

A drag racing family.

[Josh Arnold]

It had a popular mascot. A cartoon man named Sonny Jim. I don't know if we should look that up.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, was he involved in Mark Twain's work?

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know. But his jingles were slightly modified for the British. Oh, the cereal was manufactured by Nestle. Oh. Only in the uk okay. No wonder we didn't. But it was up until 2013.

[Chick McGee]

Believe that's Big Jim Tommer.

[Josh Arnold]

1898. Kellogg's Cornflakes.

[Chick McGee]

There we go.

[Josh Arnold]

By William and John Harvey Kellogg, man.

[Chick McGee]

Well known lunatics.

[Josh Arnold]

Number eight. There was a cereal called Vito's.

[Chick McGee]

Vito's.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Eat it.

[Tom Griswold]

All right. Like it?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Hurry up.

[Josh Arnold]

Grape nuts. Tom. 1897.

[Christy Lee]

Wow.

[Josh Arnold]

I had no idea.

[Christy Lee]

Was that before. Did you say 1898 for corn flakes?

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

So Grape Nuts is older than Corn Flakes.

[Josh Arnold]

It is.

[Pat Godwin]

I never would have thought.

[Chick McGee]

And there are still. There are boxes from that original run still out there.

[Josh Arnold]

Shredded wheat, 1890.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh.

[Christy Lee]

Even earlier.

[Tom Griswold]

What the hell?

[Josh Arnold]

Petty John's Breakfast Food.

[Chick McGee]

Go ahead. Well, I got to go have breakfast with Petty John.

[Josh Arnold]

Granola was a type of cereal that was a kellogg1 from 1881. He was way in into cereal then. Something called Waitana and number one, something called Granula.

[Tom Griswold]

Granula.

[Josh Arnold]

Granula. Eating the breakfast and filling the. Oh, sorry Little.

[Christy Lee]

Is there a cereal called Wheat Bix or am I making that up?

[Tom Griswold]

Wheat Bix.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

I just had a conversation about these. They were like pucks. They're kind of like. Yeah, they were kind of shredded. Weedy. Oh, oh, the big.

[Tom Griswold]

There used to be round ones and there was. There was only one. Gross. They were like pucks. There was only one grocery store that had them. I used to go there specifically to get them.

[Christy Lee]

I thought they were called Wheat Bix.

[Josh Arnold]

No, you're right. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

I think my grandparents ate those.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. This says the. There are Grape nuts created by C.W. post in 1897. This news account suggests that there are no nuts and no grapes.

[Josh Arnold]

It is true. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

It's all glorious artificial flavor.

[Christy Lee]

I wonder why they called it that.

[Josh Arnold]

It works, doesn't it?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. I don't know. I just had a bowl, so.

[Chick McGee]

Did you really?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, and you know, with the Shredded Wheat. By the way, I'm stealing your silver in the morning.

[Tom Griswold]

And Grape Nuts. Have you noticed when you leave them in the bowl and it hardens, that was what they used in the exterior of the space shuttle.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, I had no idea.

[Tom Griswold]

It's able to handle re entry temperatures without coming. That's what they should test dishwashers with. Glued on used Grape Nuts. Well, I'm glad you Had a good cereal morning.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, thank you. How about you? Did you have cereal this morning?

[Tom Griswold]

I had a mixture of Cornflakes and Grape Nuts. All right. Delightful.

[Chick McGee]

I always mix.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I do, too.

[Chick McGee]

Honey Nut Cheerios and big bowl of Raisin Bran. Oh, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Do you eat Honey Nut Cheerios out of the box, though, Just like popcorn. I do. I can't have them around one of

[Tom Griswold]

my restaurants that I like to go to one day had. I think this might be the. The most calories in any cereal. Cinnamon Toast Crunch.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

That's got to be high.

[Chick McGee]

Well, there's. There's a cereal called Little Chocolate Cakes. Have you seen that? That's a breakfast cereal.

[Tom Griswold]

They had a Cinnamon Toast Crunch pancakes.

[Chick McGee]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

Sugar be damned. They were just delightful.

[Chick McGee]

That sounds.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, I'm glad you had a good morning, Josh. You know we're currently broadcasting into the serial capital of the world.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes. Yeah. A couple cereal places.

[Tom Griswold]

We broadcast Battle Creek, Michigan.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I thought it was Prague. Czechoslovslovakia.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, and corrected.

[Chick McGee]

My fault.

[Tom Griswold]

I assume if you live in a place where they make cereal, you can probably smell it in the town.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, Cedar Rapids for sure. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

What are they making? Cedar Rapids.

[Josh Arnold]

It's a post plant, isn't it?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Captain Crunch and Captain Crunch.

[Pat Godwin]

My favorite.

[Chick McGee]

That's right. Not Captain Crunch.

[Josh Arnold]

Captain.

[Chick McGee]

Captain.

[Tom Griswold]

And hasn't it been determined that his insignia is not that of a captain?

[Josh Arnold]

Somebody. Some. What's the penalty for some maritime dork?

[Chick McGee]

Impersonate a military officer?

[Tom Griswold]

I remember there was a controversy and then someone pointed out that on any given vessel, whatever one's rank, if you're the highest rank, you are automatically the captain. I believe was the. I'm not sure if that's technically in maritime. Star Trek.

[Al Jackson]

It is.

[Josh Arnold]

That is correct.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, is it? Yeah. Okay.

[Chick McGee]

I need someone out there to do this for me. Reenact the cane mutiny with the Captain Crunch people. Have Captain Crunch be Humphrey Bogart and see Strawberries. That's why I had him strawberry.

[Tom Griswold]

And what do you have? Like the ball. What was it? Ball bearings?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Nuttier than a fruitcake.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, well, Captain Crunch has his Crunch berries, so I don't know.

[Josh Arnold]

Crunch Berries. That's very funny.

[Chick McGee]

Go ahead and write it. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Where's Seth McFarland on that?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Mr. Big Time.

[Tom Griswold]

We have your letters coming up. We have an update on a couple of stories from yesterday of interest, including the trapeze story. I believe Mr. Godwin has composed a very short song.

[Al Jackson]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

In honor of that.

[Chick McGee]

This was the most. One of the most horrible accidents in the world. The trapeze incident yesterday.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, we'll, we'll get to that. We have letters about all kinds of interesting things, including the aforementioned Star Trek. And we have, coming up, an unusual situation. We have Ali Breen on a Thursday with Sexy time.

[Kelly Collette]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, comedian Kelly Collette will be joining us. We'll look forward to seeing Kelly again and also talk to comedian Al Jackson. Oh, actually my first letter ties into this announcement. Just by chance, this is something I'm a big fan of called the aura frame. There's one right there. Oh look, that's me with, with Fluffy right there behind. And did you see by the way, the off topic here? A Fluffy got his star in the Hollywood Walk of Fame yesterday.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, that's nice.

[Tom Griswold]

Gabriel Iglesias.

[Chick McGee]

I thought you were talking about your pet cat.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, no, no, the comedian Gabriel, one of the nicest guys ever.

[Chick McGee]

Truly is.

[Tom Griswold]

Got his, his star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. In any event, when I say that picture, there's one of me and Ms. Pat. There are photographs rotating in this, inside this aura frame. It's a really cool electronic gizmo that happens to be the carver mat frame. Which by the way, we have a special offer for that coming up. But I want to read this letter first. This comes to us from Mr. Rothweller. He writes, thanks for the recommendation. I purchased an aura frame, gave it to my wife for Valentine's Day. We both love it. I couldn't recommend it more. Thanks for turning it on to your local loyal listeners. Yours truly, 20 year fan. Well, thank you, sir. I'm glad you were able to take advantage of that. Oh, there's us with one of the cast members from Saturday Night Live. There's Peter Frampton. What I'm saying is talking about is those pictures are rotating through the aura frame. You can preload it, you can give it as a gift and then you can keep adding photographs or videos. They're just terrific. It's a really cool thing. And we have a special offer that I mentioned a second ago. If you go to auraframes.com and that's a U R auraframes.com use the promo code Tom. Knock 35 bucks off the best selling Carver matte frame. By the way, it was named number one by wire cutter. And once again you can save on this great gift by visiting auraframes.com and again, it's a U R aura and surround yourself with the aura of great photography, great video. It's really fun and it does make a terrific gift. Maybe you've got a an Irish relative or someone who likes Irish Spring soap or Irish whiskey. Any excuse to get one of these.

[Chick McGee]

It's great.

[Tom Griswold]

As soon as I heard about it, I got one. I've got one in my house. It's currently rotating with some picture. Oh, look, there's a picture of us with a gigantic cake. How cool is that? I guess you'd be. I wish we could broadcast that frame moving on the air.

[Chick McGee]

Well, maybe someday.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Once again, it's the aura frame. Aura Aura frames.com promo code is. Tom. It's wonderful. Coming up, your your letters. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Christy Lee]

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[Chick McGee]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom show. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts studios. Think O'Reilly Auto Parts for all your car care needs. Get the parts and service you need fast from the professional parts people at O'Reilly Auto Parts. There's Christy Lee at the news desk.

[Christy Lee]

Hello, Chick.

[Chick McGee]

Hello indeed. There's Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hey, Chick.

[Chick McGee]

That, that blue shirt just makes you desirable.

[Pat Godwin]

Really?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

I would suggest unbuttoning that top button. Oh, show the ladies you're open for

[Pat Godwin]

maybe in a little bit.

[Chick McGee]

There's Josh Arnold. There's Ace Cosby. I'm chick@the orangeinsouls.com sports desk. Hello, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello, Chick. I read a letter earlier from Tom and what a dumb name. I forgot to forgot to mention where he was from. Pat, pay close attention. He was writing to say that he got his wife, one of those great aura frames, picture frames that we have. This is. That really is one of the coolest things we've ever told people about. In any event, he says he got it for his wife for Valentine's Day. Big plus. No need to go into the details on that. But he lives in Beaufort, Georgia. Oh, you know what? Buford, Georgia is right next to what coming Georgia.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

And it's spelled correctly, if you will,

[Tom Griswold]

which was in the news a while back. Pat, is that something you're prepared to play for us or do you need a little bit of warning, a little bit of time?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Will you take your time? We'll get back to it.

[Chick McGee]

We have a emails from our listeners brought to you by sleep number Hurry in. Your last chance to get select sleep number mattresses take up to 30 to 40% off our top rated bed. You know, if, if you. Would you rather fight me or I'm going to take your sleep number bed. Would you rather fight than. So I keep my sleep number bed. You could hit me in the mouth, that'd be fine.

[Tom Griswold]

This morning I woke up and there were three people in my sleep number bed. All right, wait a minute. Let me rephrase that. Oh, there were three hearts beating in my sleep number bed. Kelly's mine and my dog, Mr. Fletcher.

[Christy Lee]

Is he in between the two of you?

[Tom Griswold]

He was. I didn't know he was there. He's a good baby until I. Till I woke up. And what the hell, he was kind of down around our feet there every day. Now this is he's. But see, he loves it. He loves my sleep number bed.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, so do mine.

[Tom Griswold]

There are two dog beds in my bedroom and yet he, he did not want to be in one of them.

[Chick McGee]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

By the way, in the other dog bed was my daughter heart. I wish I was kidding.

[Chick McGee]

You hear about that every now and then. Children who want to be treated and it's evidently healthy.

[Tom Griswold]

It's a very big dog bed and it's.

[Chick McGee]

She loves it and she. They think they're dogs.

[Christy Lee]

Is it one of those big fluffy ones?

[Josh Arnold]

Ye, yes.

[Tom Griswold]

It's oval shaped. It's like six feet long.

[Christy Lee]

I can see why she likes it.

[Chick McGee]

Have you seen the sleeping bag that looks like a hippopot. Hippopotamus. And you crawl in and as you're snuggling in it looks like the hippopotamus is eating you. It's hilarious.

[Tom Griswold]

That's great. I love that.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

That actually ties into a new story we have.

[Chick McGee]

Well, my psychic comedy continues.

[Tom Griswold]

We Have a new story today coming up about Ace Ventura detective and the. And the rhino prop.

[Josh Arnold]

Man, that scene was funny.

[Tom Griswold]

That's. It's.

[Chick McGee]

Man, I hate being right.

[Tom Griswold]

That. That's for sale. It's, it's, it's nice. It's up for auction. So if you know what I'm talking

[Chick McGee]

about, kids start crying.

[Tom Griswold]

We'll get to that. Coming up. Do you want to begin our letter segment?

[Chick McGee]

Their Bob and Top show. Listening to you this morning as we drive to North Carolina to move our little brother back home from being in the Marines for the last four years.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Chick McGee]

There you go. Thanks for a great show. And this is. I. I can't figure this out, but I'm just going to read it as written. Josh, please never leave us. We love you. That's Aaron.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, it's very sweet, Aaron. Thank you. And thank you to your little brother. Man, oh, man.

[Chick McGee]

Maybe they were talking about you missed a week with your. With your hymen surgery.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Hymen replacements.

[Chick McGee]

I'm sorry.

[Tom Griswold]

Sorry.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, it's back intact and better than ever.

[Tom Griswold]

Rectal hyman.

[Chick McGee]

By the way, we gotta clarify.

[Josh Arnold]

I have to get a softer bike seat.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, now you can horseback ride.

[Tom Griswold]

This comes to us from Tim. More Tom speak.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, good.

[Tom Griswold]

We were in Seattle planning our day when I asked where we were going. I told my kids we're going to the fish museum. Of course I met aquarium.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, I love that.

[Tom Griswold]

While visiting for. From Vicksburg.

[Josh Arnold]

Speaking of fish, we talked a lot about anchovies yesterday and whether or not we'd ever had them on pizza. Whether if we like them in Caesar salads, et cetera, et cetera. Laura from Leland, North Carolina, wants to know if we've ever tried a popular pizza with Clams Casino. Apparently it's popular in like Connecticut and stuff.

[Christy Lee]

What's Clams Casino? I'm not familiar.

[Chick McGee]

Isn't that I've always.

[Josh Arnold]

I've heard it.

[Tom Griswold]

Bacon.

[Christy Lee]

I've heard it too, but I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

I think they're. They're. They may be spoiled. So you're gambling if you eat them?

[Josh Arnold]

That's probably a good guess, but I. I have had clams on pizza before. Have you guys? No, but I have not. I don't know that it was considered Clams Casino or not, so. Because it was just like a regular pizza. But it had some clams. Like, I just remember the marinara and the clams and none of us were thrilled by it.

[Christy Lee]

You were. Clams Casino apparently is bacon, right? Clams topped with a mixture of bacon, bread crumbs, garlic, peppers. Got your panko butter and herbs baked or broiled until crispy.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay, that sounds pretty good.

[Christy Lee]

That sounds pretty good.

[Tom Griswold]

I got this letter involving yesterday's dress code. You may recall that.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, real quick, Laura. No, we hadn't tried it.

[Christy Lee]

Thank you, Laura.

[Tom Griswold]

Patty G. Yesterday, we have the audio from his shirt. Pat wore his kind of a tablecloth check shirt and got quite a bit of grief for it. The Dear Bob and Tom show. I enjoyed your foray into the Morning Y' all show.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I loved your great cowgirl boots, Christie.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, thank you.

[Chick McGee]

Never miss Morning, y'. All.

[Tom Griswold]

And Pat with the John Denver look. I know you'll never wear that shirt again after all the crap they gave you. Please sign it and shoot. Shoot it out of a T shirt. Candidate your next live stream show.

[Pat Godwin]

That's not a bad idea.

[Tom Griswold]

I would love to get a T shirt canon. What would you do with it next time we do a live show, Shoot T shirts up. Although there's probably potential liability, I would think.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, probably.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, someone catches it in the eye, and the next thing you know, you're. You're. You're in court.

[Chick McGee]

I was giving away CDs when the world was young, quite a while ago. And I'm. I was throwing them on the stage, and I was flipping them like Frisbees and hit a guy in the side right under his ear, and the blood just started to trickle right down his face.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Somebody's getting sued for a guitar pick.

[Chick McGee]

I wouldn't die.

[Christy Lee]

A guitar pick?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

How would that hurt?

[Tom Griswold]

I'll have to dig.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, definitely.

[Christy Lee]

Really?

[Pat Godwin]

Look at this.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, it's sharp. You'll get caught. Touch it.

[Pat Godwin]

Kiss it.

[Josh Arnold]

Christy, you were asking about your owl box.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

You have one of those? I have an owl box attached to a tree. Is it?

[Christy Lee]

I do, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

And you're wondering how you can get owls in there?

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

We have a letter saying, have you tried putting two Tootsie Pops in the elbow?

[Chick McGee]

Mr. Owl, how many licks does it take to get to the center?

[Josh Arnold]

Let's find out. A one, a two, a three.

[Chick McGee]

Crunch.

[Christy Lee]

I have another. This is from Brian. He doesn't say where he's from. There's a picture included with this, but I don't know if you want to show it, Jason. Christy, you're talking about birds flying into her window. Yeah, I have, you know, a couple of kamikaze birds that have passed. Well, at least it wasn't a turkey. This turkey flew into the side of my House and died. And there's a picture of the poor turkey.

[Josh Arnold]

Did it happen maybe the third week of November?

[Chick McGee]

The picture of the turkey looks like a homeless bum in a pile of dirty clothes is what it looks like. It's amazing.

[Josh Arnold]

It just died.

[Chick McGee]

It just died.

[Christy Lee]

Poor little thing.

[Chick McGee]

I don't know.

[Josh Arnold]

Do you go ahead and try to prepare it?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Happy Thanksgiving.

[Josh Arnold]

Can you.

[Chick McGee]

If you.

[Christy Lee]

Can you eat that?

[Chick McGee]

You were driving down the road, you see deer or turkey. Can you throw that in the back and go cook it?

[Tom Griswold]

We just had that story. Yeah, it depends what state you're in, right?

[Josh Arnold]

In this case, it's your own backyard. I mean, you got to figure out how to pluck it and everything.

[Christy Lee]

Okay, so yesterday I happened to be at Aldi, my favorite store. I'm not gonna lie. And they had sun catchers for, like, five bucks. Two of them for five bucks.

[Tom Griswold]

What is that?

[Christy Lee]

They're like things that hang down and they catch the sun so they sparkle and stuff. So I bought four and hung them on my windows. So let's see if that works.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, the reflection keeps the birds. Very good. Now, this comes to us from northeastern Ohio. You guys were talking about being able to hear. Oh, I see radios through appliances because where I used to live, I could hear an AM radio station coming through my toaster because it wasn't too far from the. The broadcast tower right here on this property. I can hear voices coming out of my fan.

[Chick McGee]

The best thing to do is just say, huh. Okay, that's interesting.

[Tom Griswold]

I have asked other people if they've experienced this. They look at me like I'm crazy.

[Chick McGee]

Who's the first person that did that with the fan?

[Al Jackson]

The.

[Chick McGee]

Luke, I am your father. You know, so funny with the. Oh, yeah, you're standing behind the fan.

[Tom Griswold]

This guy's fan has turned into a radio. He must be near something emitting a lot of what they call rf. Yeah. Okay, Travis, well, thank you very much. We certainly appreciate you listening. I hope that the radio coming through your fan is from this show.

[Chick McGee]

Strange.

[Tom Griswold]

We certainly appreciate your listening. Now, who else has a letter?

[Chick McGee]

Dear Bob, at Top show last fall, my wife and I visited CBS on Sanibel Island, Florida. To our surprise, as you said, Tom, no one was working in the store. There were other shoppers all the way back in the pharmacy. Tom is not the only one to experience this strange phenomenon.

[Josh Arnold]

No, it's. It's an epidemic.

[Chick McGee]

That's Mike and Louisville.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. You have to look around and find somebody. That's the beauty, though, of self checkout. Sure I just hope they're not getting. Hope they're not getting ripped off.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, it's their own fault. Well, have an employee up there.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but I mean, it's. Don't be dishonest. I mean, I can't be dishonest.

[Chick McGee]

Can you imagine trying to have some, you know, build a workforce at a cvs, trying to get everybody there on time and scheduling and I'd go mad.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

That's why you have this job. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Pat, have you been able to.

[Pat Godwin]

I will have to listen to it during the day.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, okay. All right.

[Christy Lee]

I have a letter. That's.

[Chick McGee]

What are you, Prince? Come on, let's hear this.

[Christy Lee]

This is from Susan in Des Moines, Iowa. She said, I really love when you guys go totally off script. I laughed and laughed all day at work today, listening and watching your show. Tom, you were hilarious when you wouldn't stop saying ridiculous jokes about Pat and his unfunny lobster bisque slash Easter bisque joke. And she puts a question mark.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, we were just, huh. Suffering through.

[Christy Lee]

But Chicken Josh making fun of Tom was hilarious. Thank you.

[Chick McGee]

We weren't making fun.

[Josh Arnold]

Having fun with.

[Chick McGee]

He's always in awe.

[Josh Arnold]

Proper respect for show.

[Chick McGee]

Yes, sir.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, boy.

[Chick McGee]

He's the man.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm sure this is a common event. This comes to us from Sarah in Wisconsin. And we do have an. A couple of interesting news stories out of Wisconsin today, by the way, including a great minor league baseball story.

[Chick McGee]

Cool.

[Tom Griswold]

Morning, friends. My family went to visit our grandmother. She was delighted to break out her foot massager that he. That. Excuse me. That she had purchased at a garage sale.

[Chick McGee]

A used foot massager.

[Christy Lee]

Is that what it was?

[Tom Griswold]

No, she was showing it off. Of course it was a dildo.

[Christy Lee]

Of course,

[Tom Griswold]

Grammy wasn't aware of that. Now, Patty G, are you ready with this? Yeah, I think I can do it. We. We had a letter from Buford, Georgia, not too far from Coming, Georgia. Coming, Georgia. And it's. It's C, M M I N G, right?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, that's right.

[Tom Griswold]

And we had an interesting news story about a. A gentleman who was.

[Christy Lee]

Naked guy. Right.

[Tom Griswold]

Arrested on a porch naked. And I. I guess it wasn't the first time. Do you know the tune at this point? You got it?

[Chick McGee]

I do.

[Al Jackson]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

I'm ready to go. Oh, there's a man from a town called Coming he's walking in your backyard nude Try and stop the man, man from coming he's gonna do something lewd. He came on your porch and left a present they got it on video Caught in the act the coming man. Now off to jail he goes. They finally stopped the man from coming. He put on quite a show. They cuffed his hands and stopped the man from coming. Now he just can't come and go.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, thank you very much.

[Josh Arnold]

The ballad of the man.

[Pat Godwin]

Come, coming.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

The ballot of the coming man.

[Tom Griswold]

That's from the Forsyth Herald, by the way. He was arrested and charged with trespassing naked through his neighbor's backyard. Turned himself into authorities, by the way. Finally, there's a lot to this and a lot of nudity in crime lately. I think this must be. Have something to do with some of the drugs that are floating around out there now.

[Chick McGee]

They make you want to take your clothes off, I guess.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, apparently. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Especially certain crimes we've had involving meth. There's a. There's. There's a lot of nudity. We have. We had an interesting story yesterday about a flying trapeze story that's going around and it turns out this is one of those things floating around the Internet that is in fact, not true.

[Christy Lee]

Right?

[Chick McGee]

It did not happen.

[Tom Griswold]

It did not happen. But you may have seen the story. It was. It's been widely circulated. There's a photograph, the whole thing. According to this news account, the most recent iteration of the story claims that an Italian aerialist performing on a trapeze experienced stomach issues and had diarrhea during his act and, quote, showered 23 people watching from below.

[Pat Godwin]

Is this the crappies artist?

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, it is.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, yes. And.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, hey, hey, wait a minute. That was a little joke there.

[Pat Godwin]

Very tiny little joke.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, as a matter of sending. Pat, you've written a song about this gentleman.

[Pat Godwin]

He floats through the air with the greatest of ease. The daring young man with the flying feces.

[Chick McGee]

Very nice.

[Josh Arnold]

How droll.

[Tom Griswold]

But again.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, play the poop song if you.

[Tom Griswold]

If you run across this story.

[Chick McGee]

Fake.

[Tom Griswold]

Did not happen. I'm a big trapeze fan.

[Chick McGee]

Of course you are.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, that's. You've never seen one of these? Ever seen one?

[Chick McGee]

I do not think I've seen a trapeze lot. Well, no, I went to the. The Cirque du Soleil. I was there. And they. But they're. I'm sure there's a standard trapeze in there somewhere. Yeah, they really fly around rubber bands

[Tom Griswold]

and I remember seeing one as a kid and then they. And when they're done, they. They gracefully land in the net and. Yeah, and they trampolines them up and

[Chick McGee]

they flip over backwards and they flip off of it.

[Christy Lee]

I love that.

[Tom Griswold]

It's Cool. Very cool. Now if you want to get a hold of us, it's Bob and tom@bob and tom.com. we would love to hear from you, whatever is on your mind. And coming up today, it's a special edition of Sexy Time with Ali Breen. Comedian Al Jackson and comedian Kelly Collette will be our guest. Ms. Collette will be here relatively soon, so hope you can hang out with us. And right now I want to talk about those credit card bills. You take a look at that statement every now and then. And sometimes you have to sort of let the balance ride for a month or two. And if you take a really good look at it, you'll see the interest rate is more or less ungodly. Sometimes over 20% interest is what you're paying on that credit card debt. So you might want to consider taking advantage of the equity you have in your home and knocking that debt away and refinancing the house. And that's what American Financing is doing, helping out folks with a lot of credit card debt. Among many other things. They've got mortgage rates in the fives. They're showing homeowners how to use the equity in their home to wipe out that high interest debt. And the average savings can be as much as 800 bucks a month. So look into this. If you start today, you could delay two mortgage payments, by the way. So you call their salary based mortgage consultants today at 866-889-2611. That's 866-889-2611. If you can't remember the number, just go to american financing.net that's americanfinancing.net bobandtom nmls1,82334 nmlsconsumeraccess.org apr for rates in the 5 start at 6.196%. For well qualified borrowers, call 866-889-2611 for details about credit.

[Announcer]

This is the Bob and Tom Show. Reach us toll free at 1-888-bobtom1 [e-mail] this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, let's be honest. Phone plans are now ridiculously expensive. If you're tired of spending crazy money on high wireless bills, bogus fees and so called free perks that cost you more in the long run, it might be time to ditch big wireless. Hey, give a premium wireless plan from mint mobile for 15 bucks a month a try.

[Christy Lee]

Stop overpaying for just because that's how it's always been. Mint exists purely to fix that for just 15 bucks a month. You could save hundreds compared to those other guys.

[Chick McGee]

Bring your own phone and number. Activate with ESIM in minutes and start saving immediately. No long term contracts, no hassle. Switching to Mint Mobile was right for me and it might be right for you.

[Josh Arnold]

Mint Mobile isn't just affordable. They bring the quality you expect from those big wireless companies. All plans come with high speed data and unlimited talk and text delivered on the nation's largest 5G network. Mint Mobile is here to rescue you with premium wireless plans starting at 15 bucks a month.

[Tom Griswold]

If you like your money, Mint Mobile is for you. Shop [e-mail] bobandtom that's mintmobile.com BobandTom upfront payment of 45 bucks for a 3 month 5 gigabyte plan is required. Equivalent to $15 a month new customer offer for first 3 months only. Then full price plan options available, taxes and fees extra. See Mint Mobile for all the details.

[Chick McGee]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom show in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios at the News Center. There's Christy Lee.

[Christy Lee]

Hello.

[Chick McGee]

There's Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hey, Chick.

[Chick McGee]

That swell blue shirt. There's Josh Arnold.

[Josh Arnold]

Hi there.

[Chick McGee]

There's Ace Cosby. Yes, ladies still has the beard. Beard on Ace. There he is. I'm Chick. Hello, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello. Chuck McGee at the orangeinsouls.com sports desk. Getting ready for sports should always be in quotes. Remember that college, college basketball coming up. Josh, you described an event that occurred to you this morning that you say will mean a great day.

[Chick McGee]

You know what?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

It was an event. It absolutely wasn't.

[Tom Griswold]

And I have a similar one. I just realized. Yes, please, please explain yours again.

[Josh Arnold]

Now I had my. The last bowl of cereal today and it corresponded perfectly with the last amount of milk in the container.

[Christy Lee]

Ah, that's.

[Josh Arnold]

And that's rare.

[Christy Lee]

Where it's beautiful.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, they were perfectly balanced.

[Chick McGee]

Talk about a Cinderella story.

[Al Jackson]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Do you have a so called pill caddy?

[Chick McGee]

As a matter of fact I do. Of course. And you know, I have a pill caddy. I've got 19 different things wrong with me. Of course I have a pill caddy.

[Josh Arnold]

I have.

[Chick McGee]

I'm not, I'm not self conscious about it though. That's what you think.

[Josh Arnold]

You guys have more than one.

[Chick McGee]

More than one pill caddy? Oh, yes, I have many pill caddies. You're gonna be jealous.

[Tom Griswold]

I have a morning one and an afternoon one.

[Josh Arnold]

I have morning, afternoon and evening.

[Chick McGee]

What I'm about to do is called checkmate.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, please.

[Chick McGee]

I have a Batman pill caddy.

[Tom Griswold]

You win.

[Chick McGee]

Oh yes, that's it.

[Christy Lee]

I have a friend that has a pill caddy and I had pill caddy envy.

[Tom Griswold]

What is this?

[Christy Lee]

It kind of closed and then it had its own little pouch so no matter what happened, it wouldn't open up. You know how sometimes those plastic things will open up in your suitcase or whatever. Hers was just beautiful.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow. Now for me a good day, which it happened to me today. You take the pill caddy out, it's dark, trying to make no noise. Take the pill caddy out. Flip the one that says in this case Thursday.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Right. Flip it over. This is a two parter. All of the pills in there came out.

[Josh Arnold]

None got stuck or anything like that?

[Tom Griswold]

None got stuck because they do. That'll happen particularly to the Occupy the eye vitamin that I take.

[Chick McGee]

What the hell is that?

[Tom Griswold]

It's got kind of a gel cap. Sure. Yeah. It tends to get stuck.

[Josh Arnold]

Your fish oils, your jelly caps. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And yeah. So I've got my two Centrum minis for men.

[Chick McGee]

By the way, I take the Centrum Mini.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. By the way, one time I bought the mini. Be careful. I bought the Centrum Minis for women. Yeah. It was awful.

[Chick McGee]

I did too.

[Tom Griswold]

But I can't grow nurse. No. I had the worst period of my life.

[Chick McGee]

Stop taking. But my lover loves my breasts.

[Tom Griswold]

So I got the two centro minis, the one occupied eye vitamin, the two omega 3 fish oils.

[Chick McGee]

What the hell.

[Tom Griswold]

Now see this? So it's a good day when. And the. By the way, the fish oils in the oculite often stick together and stick to the pill caddy.

[Josh Arnold]

Yep.

[Tom Griswold]

So I flip them over, all of them come out into my hand clean.

[Josh Arnold]

Very good sign then.

[Tom Griswold]

But none of the other little doors open. Doors opened up.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

That's big because on a bad day you. You flip it. And Tuesdays will open along with Wednesdays

[Chick McGee]

and their pills everywhere.

[Tom Griswold]

And if you've refilled, they're everywhere.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

So see, that's another sign of a good day.

[Josh Arnold]

You're exactly right.

[Tom Griswold]

And then I. My luck paid off when I decided I was going to try to take the freeway again today.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

And then at the last second I noticed that my exit had been closed. They have the sign like three feet before you have to switch lanes. I did a high power lane change.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And I made it here.

[Christy Lee]

No, here's the problem. It wasn't closed.

[Chick McGee]

There we go.

[Christy Lee]

And it. But it says it's closed. And then if you wait a minute, then it changes. Sunday, 10pm to 5am or whatever.

[Tom Griswold]

So it wasn't closed right. Well, Oscar got off where I did, except there was a large truck coming in. The outdoor, if you will.

[Christy Lee]

I know that happened to me the other. Not me, but just pass me. I watched the guy turn into that.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, it's so poorly marked. So he had all the cars had to slam in their brakes to avoid smashing into a giant truck. Congratulations. Congratulations to the sign folks there. They're doing a great job. Now we did have. I forget. I think we were celebrating the birthday of James Doohan.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah. Sometime this week. Yeah. The distinguished actor Scotty most famously.

[Tom Griswold]

And the guy was a war hero. I mean, the guy was a good guy. But I mentioned that he was missing a finger and I wanted to find out about that, so I did a little homework. James Doohan, he played Montgomery Scott, nicknamed Scotty, on Star Trek, the original series, was missing the middle finger of his right hand. Listen to this. During D day, World War II, he was a Canadian army artillery officer. He was hit by machine gun fire from a Canadian centaur. Friendly fire. He was hit six times and it blew off his right middle finger. He also had bullets in his legs and chest. Fortunately, he survived, went on to an acting career.

[Chick McGee]

But it's a. Doesn't sound like an accident. It sounds like something somebody's aiming for him.

[Tom Griswold]

The directors on Star Trek would block the shots so that you would not be able to see the missing finger that have him hold clipboards and stuff. Apparently, for true fans, there are specific episodes. If you freeze frame, you can see the missing finger.

[Chick McGee]

That's right. Yes, absolutely. Oh, Gary Berghoff on MASH played radar. He has a missing figure. Quite the drummer. But he has a missing finger.

[Christy Lee]

Really?

[Tom Griswold]

I suppose. I mean, in the Missing Finger hall of Fame, I think the greatest would probably be what Jerry Garcia.

[Pat Godwin]

Django Reinhardt.

[Tom Griswold]

Django Reinhardt.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, Garcia was missing one.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Actually. Actually, Jerry Garcia's.

[Tom Griswold]

I got like a two thirds of his. Of. On his right hand.

[Chick McGee]

Jerry Garcia had Django Reinhardt hard. No, wait a minute. Django Rank. Django's was Jerry's and Jerry and they switched back and forth whenever they. It was. It was a fun thing. They used.

[Josh Arnold]

Wow, A lot of music. The drummer from Def Leppard is missing five fingers. Yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

A four and a thumb.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, true. Yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I didn't want to get a letter.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, God.

[Tom Griswold]

But by the way, thoughtful.

[Chick McGee]

By the way, if you search luxury pill caddy, how would you like to pay $45 for a pillow? Look at it.

[Christy Lee]

$45. Oh, what is It.

[Chick McGee]

It comes with a lock and key.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, come on. Hey, don't you steal my stool softener, you bastard.

[Chick McGee]

You keep your nose out of my meds there, ladies. Yeah, and my magnesium.

[Christy Lee]

How many supplements do you take a day?

[Josh Arnold]

Two dozen maybe.

[Christy Lee]

Really?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Al Jackson]

All.

[Josh Arnold]

All based on tests I've had done.

[Christy Lee]

No, I think it's great. I'm just. That's.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, I can tell that's a lot. Yikes. No, no, I think it's great.

[Tom Griswold]

By the way, I just. You know, we, we. I like to talk about things that actually work. Let's talk about things that don't work. Like I have the. The fish oil that says no fish burps. Oh, I got news for you.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. You know what? It makes me wonder how bad the other ones.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Cats start following you. Okay. By the way. Now to get back to Mr. Doohan.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

First of all, by the way, I've

[Chick McGee]

only done with that.

[Tom Griswold]

Sorry. We have a letter.

[Chick McGee]

You tool.

[Pat Godwin]

Is he the guy?

[Josh Arnold]

Is he Jimmy Pardo's father in law? No, that was Walter Koenig.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, okay. Gotcha.

[Chick McGee]

Sulu. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, listening to your show the other day.

[Chick McGee]

I know who is his mother.

[Tom Griswold]

No, that comes into play. Tom said that James do handed a finger missing on one of his hands. And then someone else said. I'm not sure it was. That's why Uhuru chose Captain Kirk.

[Josh Arnold]

Ah, yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Was that you, Josh?

[Josh Arnold]

It was.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

You know when they kissed.

[Tom Griswold]

The implication being it was the missing middle finger. The diddling process would be significantly.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Third base wasn't as exciting.

[Al Jackson]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

When a Hoover.

[Tom Griswold]

It was his right. Right hand. The one that had all the.

[Christy Lee]

Can't reach the G spot without it.

[Josh Arnold]

No, you don't. You can't get that really good.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

On that hot sex kiss there. Remember on Star Trek those Kirk.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, man.

[Chick McGee]

Giant mind controller. That's why they. They made them kiss.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. And that was revolutionary.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

In the world of America.

[Josh Arnold]

Interracial kiss in American television.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Now according to Bob from Wausau, W

[Chick McGee]

A U S A U S A

[Tom Griswold]

U S. While true that James Doohan was missing a digit, it was not in his hand. It was on his foot.

[Chick McGee]

Huh.

[Tom Griswold]

For this reason.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, oh. Standby comedy

[Tom Griswold]

for this reason. This is by the way, written by Bob from Warsaw. Uhura chose Captain Kirk. You see, Uhura was lack toes intolerant. Oh.

[Josh Arnold]

She wouldn't put up with it.

[Tom Griswold]

See what happened there?

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Was not gonna put up with it.

[Chick McGee]

Okay. I thought it was gonna be a foot and A half thing.

[Josh Arnold]

Good on him for retrofitting that class.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

The foot and a half joke has always been one of my favorites.

[Chick McGee]

Wonderful.

[Christy Lee]

Let Mommy handle that.

[Tom Griswold]

It involves a honeymoon.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And then back to. We were talking about breakfast cereal. We like to do the important topics on our show. I live live in Cedar Rapids, Iowa. I can confirm there's a Quaker Oats plant and a General Mills plant.

[Josh Arnold]

Absolutely.

[Tom Griswold]

If you drive by the Quaker plant on Crunchberry Day, you can smell it.

[Josh Arnold]

How about that?

[Tom Griswold]

I wonder if they post it, if they have.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, today's Crunchberry Day.

[Tom Griswold]

I shouldn't said post. No, no. I wonder if they have a sign.

[Chick McGee]

You get fired for that sort of thing, pal.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I actually. I said it was post, but yes, Quaker Oats. That's right, because you can see him right there.

[Tom Griswold]

This comes to us from Brian in Iowa. He also writes. I have a question for Andy. Andy. Andy is Christie's lover. What do you call him?

[Christy Lee]

My husband.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, husband.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

When you go on a road trip with your beautiful wife, Christy. Andy, and you ask for a snack, does she have little baggies of Honey Nut Cheerios?

[Christy Lee]

No, I don't.

[Tom Griswold]

If so, when you get home from the trip, does she make you vacuum out the interior of her Hyundai that she loves so much?

[Chick McGee]

This guy's really gone down the bend.

[Tom Griswold]

This guy. This guy's listening.

[Al Jackson]

Listening.

[Christy Lee]

Wow. No, we don't do that. But he takes my car every Saturday, fills it up and sweeps it out and cleans it for me every Saturday.

[Chick McGee]

That is no way to live.

[Christy Lee]

That's sweet.

[Josh Arnold]

That's very sweet.

[Christy Lee]

It's very sweet.

[Tom Griswold]

Quick hand wash. Guys like that.

[Josh Arnold]

Making us look bad.

[Chick McGee]

I can tell you her car can't

[Tom Griswold]

go through a car wash because of some.

[Christy Lee]

Do you take it to one of those machine things where.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. And I, by the way, harder and

[Christy Lee]

harder to find these days.

[Tom Griswold]

I have a theory. Yeah. And I love those, by the way. I love washing cars.

[Chick McGee]

Or Tom's theory.

[Tom Griswold]

You. You put your credit card in and it gives you a certain time.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And in that time, you've got to do the quick rinse foam brush and then rinse it off.

[Christy Lee]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

And unless you're driving a smart car,

[Christy Lee]

it's not enough time.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. But I also think. I think the timer is not really working. I think there's a guy sitting upstairs, toggle switch or something going, okay, the guy's got three tires and one fender to rinse off. Turn it off.

[Josh Arnold]

Boy, that soap really plops out of that brush, doesn't it?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

It does.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, sometimes it just pours satisfying and.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah, isn't it great? It's like this great gooey orange porno shot.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, it's like a. Like a 30 year old virgin.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, look at the time. Coming up, we have more of your letters. You can reach us bob and tomobandtom.com Comedians Kelly Collette, Al Jackson and Sexy time with Ali Breen from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios, this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Announcer]

Thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom Show. Sponsored in part by Java House. The official coffee and refreshments of the Bob and Tom Show.

[Tom Griswold]

Check engine ABS or maintenance light on. Take the guesswork out of your warning lights with O'Reilly variscate. The service is free and provides a report with solutions verified by ASE Certified Master Technicians.

[Josh Arnold]

And if you need help, we could

[Tom Griswold]

recommend a shop for you. Ask for O'Reilly Veriscan today. Auto parts. Tom.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios at the News Center. It's Christy Lee. Hi, There's Pat Godwin. Hello. There's Josh Arnold. Hello, There's Ace Cosby. Hey, man, I'm Chick. Hello, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello, Chick McGee. Once again, Chick McGee [e-mail] let's get ready for college basketball action. We were talking about breakfast cereals and the. The first breakfast cereals. And I started wondering, I wonder what the first one was. To have a toy surprise.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, okay.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, boy. Let's think.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, I. I did a little homework during the break. What's it? 1909.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, geez.

[Tom Griswold]

Kellogg's Cornflakes. It wasn't a toy necessarily. It was a booklet called the Funny Jungle Land Moving Pictures Book.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, boy. I don't think any of those pictures would be suitable for today's.

[Josh Arnold]

Perhaps some bones and noses.

[Chick McGee]

I would think some sort of.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I'm sorry I brought it up. By the way, a Cracker Jack became famous putting prizes in packages around 1912.

[Chick McGee]

And hey, by the way, what happened to the Cracker Jack prizes? They used to be like. Not like a whistle or like a compass.

[Josh Arnold]

They used to be good. They were never good.

[Chick McGee]

When I was a kid, they weren't incredible. But now they're like little stickers and booklets.

[Tom Griswold]

I think they're designed not to get caught in the throat.

[Josh Arnold]

A few kids rule doing everything, don't they?

[Tom Griswold]

That is, throughout the 1950s, if you

[Chick McGee]

choke on a toy cannon, maybe. Sorry, go ahead.

[Tom Griswold]

Sugar Smacks, Frosted Flakes and Cap and Crunch turn cereal box toys into a huge marketing tradition. This is kind of cool. I don't know if you did. I remember getting that. The diving submarine thing. Remember this?

[Chick McGee]

No, no, no. Don't you tell me that you. Have you got it to work? Don't.

[Tom Griswold]

No.

[Christy Lee]

Have the little pills that you put in.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

I think baking soda never worked.

[Chick McGee]

Now. Ga GI Joe had like a rocket, a water sled or something. That was pretty damn cool.

[Josh Arnold]

And that actually worked.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Too bad. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

But yeah, you could get the diving sub. I looked that up. Yeah. That was often offered by Cheerios.

[Christy Lee]

Was that when you had to put the. Send the box tops in to get. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, gotcha. Okay.

[Christy Lee]

So it's come off.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. And of course that's one of the themes of the movie Christmas Story where he gets all the clues from the radio and it turns into a pretty crappy Ovaltine. Yeah. Pretty crappy prize.

[Chick McGee]

Drank more Ovaltine.

[Christy Lee]

My very first record album came from a cereal box. I saved up all the box tops to get the Fifth Dimension on one side and Neil diamond on the other.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah, what was it?

[Josh Arnold]

Age of Aquarius.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

And do you remember the Neil diamond song?

[Christy Lee]

I don't remember. It was an album. It was like more than one. It wasn't a single one. I don't remember that song until I saw the movie.

[Chick McGee]

Never a good song.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. I don't know why. I loved.

[Josh Arnold]

Was on a greatest hits compilation of his that I had and I loved it.

[Chick McGee]

Are you old enough to remember? They used to actually have like 45 records on the back of the boxes.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm looking at one right now. The Jackson 5.

[Chick McGee]

Amazing.

[Tom Griswold]

There was a Monkeys single, like a

[Christy Lee]

vinyl thing that you pull off the.

[Tom Griswold]

On honeycombs.

[Josh Arnold]

Sometimes they were square.

[Kelly Collette]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And then Ace. This has to be a collectible. Peach flavored Kiss Crunch cereal came with a record. Did you ever see that?

[Josh Arnold]

I don't remember that.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't remember that either. And it says in the back, free record from their new album Destroyer.

[Chick McGee]

Free record.

[Tom Griswold]

And it's got that classic picture of Kiss from Destroyer. That's one of the great shots with. For their.

[Josh Arnold]

It was 76.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. That's great. Yeah. They. This has to be a collectible.

[Josh Arnold]

My favorite cereal box toy was always the Wacky Wall Crawler. It was a sticky sort of squid. And you threw it up on the wall and it would just. That was amazing.

[Chick McGee]

That kind of technology doesn't exist anymore.

[Josh Arnold]

No. They found something out there.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

We're not supposed to have that.

[Tom Griswold]

Kellogg serials also had a metal license plate you could get for your bicycle.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I remember. We would always, always really try to save for those. Never got one.

[Chick McGee]

Well. And it only was six to eight weeks for delivery.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah. It was forever. Summer was over.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, yeah, right.

[Tom Griswold]

And then here's another one that never worked.

[Chick McGee]

Two different daddies by the time your

[Tom Griswold]

cereal came with the Super Sea Monkeys.

[Chick McGee]

Super Sea Monkeys, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And every kid thought, oh, my God, I'm gonna get a pet monkey. This is going to be great.

[Christy Lee]

What were they? Brine shrimp.

[Tom Griswold]

Christy, you are on it. They were tiny brine shrimp eggs that hatched in the water. Heavily advertised in comic books and sometimes promoted with cereals. So I kind of miss. They should do like an.

[Christy Lee]

They do this now. I don't. I don't buy.

[Tom Griswold]

Wouldn't it be funny for adult. What would you get if you got, you know, what would you put in Grape Nuts or. Or Shredded Wheat?

[Christy Lee]

Well, you wouldn't have to put condoms in there.

[Josh Arnold]

Like an allen wrench. Like a.

[Christy Lee]

Sorry.

[Al Jackson]

Ed.

[Tom Griswold]

Medication.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Like something that you would just kind of. You like little things you just have in drawers around the.

[Chick McGee]

Why don't you bring that? I've always said that I really enjoyed the decoder ring. I thought that was a fun thing.

[Josh Arnold]

Eyeglass screwdrivers.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Little things like that jar opener, actually,

[Chick McGee]

we were talking about earlier.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, Shredded Wheat. Now with a pill caddy. And then coming soon. Soon. We're trying to cut a deal with Eli Lilly so you can get Cialis. Cialis in your Grape Nuts. Why are we laughing? Yeah, they probably. I think some of the toy surprise stuff. The problem was if they put it in the cereal, some idiot's gonna eat it.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, but they are. When I growing up, it was always in a plastic.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, there's no way it wasn't in the beginning.

[Josh Arnold]

Right?

[Christy Lee]

Okay, that's.

[Josh Arnold]

Which is funny.

[Christy Lee]

Back in the day, siblings, did you fight over who got the toy?

[Josh Arnold]

There were. Yeah, that was always. And we were never. So the Geneva Convention rules of cereal box toys, you had to wait until it naturally poured into your bowl.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, you couldn't go deeper.

[Josh Arnold]

There was no arm in the box. It was whoever got it naturally.

[Chick McGee]

No, it was always dump it into a bowl, get the prize, and dump it all back into the box. Never.

[Josh Arnold]

That was just not allowed in the Arnold household. Now, there were some lean years in the Arnold household, as you guys know. And my mom, one year, maybe two, for whatever reason, she broke the Geneva Convention of the cereal rolls, and she would get this. She would open the cereal boxes when they bought them, dig the toys out.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, no.

[Josh Arnold]

And for. And then on Christmas morning, we would find them in our stockings.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, my.

[Pat Godwin]

That's so sad.

[Tom Griswold]

The saddest chick. Me and you. Let's start drinking again. I got some bourbon in my office, having cracked it over.

[Josh Arnold]

The saddest was the year leading up to Christmas when we all thought we were the most unlucky children on the planet, because every box of cereal, they forgot to put the toy. Like it keeps happening. Then we found out why my mom also did that with BMG CDs that I ordered with my own money. Oh, stole them from the mailbox, Is that right?

[Pat Godwin]

Merry Christmas.

[Josh Arnold]

Wrapped them and gave them to me months later for Christmas. Things I bought. Bought. And then I called BMG and yelled

[Tom Griswold]

at people because I didn't.

[Chick McGee]

Wow.

[Josh Arnold]

Her heart was in the right place.

[Pat Godwin]

Where's my Juice Newton?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, my God.

[Chick McGee]

Queen of hearts.

[Christy Lee]

You want a hug?

[Josh Arnold]

No. I mean, look, I had a really. We had a very great job.

[Christy Lee]

She was doing the right. She meant well.

[Josh Arnold]

Exactly. Yeah. And now it's hilarious.

[Ali Breen]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Well, now she's rich.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, you know, that's actually a misconception. She's married to a man named Rich,

[Chick McGee]

Now at home with the Arnold.

[Josh Arnold]

We. We had fun. Don't. Yeah, no, it was never a. I

[Chick McGee]

cut a hole in his pocket so

[Tom Griswold]

he had something to play with.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, leave your Peter alone.

[Josh Arnold]

My mom never needs.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah, you invented it. Who didn't? Coming up, we have comedians. Ali Breen with Sexy Time. Al Jackson, Kelly Collette. But right now, I hope you're having a great day, feeling good at your compound, relaxing.

[Chick McGee]

You know it, Tom. I'm all secure at mine with my Simplisafe home security system. I designed it myself and I installed it. That's how easy it is. It is. We even use a simply safe here at the Bob and Tom studios. Traditional security systems only take action after somebody's already broken in. Well, that's. Yes, way too late. Simplisafe has active guard outdoor protection can help prevent break ins before they happen. AI powered cameras backed by live professional monitoring. Real people monitor your property and detect suspicious activity. And if an agent sees someone lurking around acting suspiciously, the agents can talk to them in real time, activate spotlights, and even contact police. All before they have a chance to get inside your home. No long term contracts or cancellation fees. And SimpliSafe products protect over 4 million people with a 60 day satisfaction guarantee or your money back. And oh, by the way, SimpliSafe named best home security system of 2026 by US News and World Report and ranked number one in customer service among home security providers by both Newsweek and USA Today. And of course, we have a deal for you. Go to simplisafetom.com right now.

[Tom Griswold]

Now.

[Chick McGee]

And get 50% off a new SimpliSafe system with professional monitoring for Bob and Tom show listeners only. Go to simplisafetom.com and enjoy 50% off Simply Safe system with professional monitoring. There's no safe like SimpliSafe.

[Tom Griswold]

Coming up, which toy surprise is the most valued by collectors?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, that's interesting.

[Chick McGee]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

Wait till you hear what it is. It's a little bit dated. I don't think they would do this today, but we'll find out what it was when we return to the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Kelly Collette]

What would you do if your online

[Tom Griswold]

store converted 36% more shoppers?

[Kelly Collette]

You could take 36% more vacation.

[Tom Griswold]

Another pina colada.

[Chick McGee]

Yes, please.

[Kelly Collette]

Open a new retail location with 36% more square feet.

[Chick McGee]

Fantastic.

[Kelly Collette]

Hire 36% more help.

[Tom Griswold]

You're hired.

[Chick McGee]

And you're hired.

[Kelly Collette]

Shopify has the world's best converting checkout up to 36% better than other e commerce platforms. What you do with those extra sales

[Tom Griswold]

is up to you. Switch to Shopify [e-mail] listen and get a $1 trial. Shopify.com listen.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom show. And boy, we've got a story for you coming up. There's Christy Lee at the News Center. There's Pat Godwin. There's Josh Arnold.

[Josh Arnold]

Hi.

[Chick McGee]

There's Ace Cosby. Hello, I'm Chick McGee. And Tom, don't cheat yourself. I, I think he might have missed this story. Christy picked up a great invention at a store over the week.

[Christy Lee]

Yesterday I was at Aldi and it was Wednesday for the, you know, the Fine Now Now Fine day.

[Chick McGee]

Take your time.

[Christy Lee]

Don't leave anything out.

[Chick McGee]

Go ahead.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. And they have rubber gloves, Tom, you might be interested in this. They have rubber gloves that have, have the scrubbing things built into them.

[Tom Griswold]

Like, like, like brushes.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

You gotta be me on the Palms.

[Kelly Collette]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

They're awesome. So you don't need a scrub brush because they're on your gloves.

[Tom Griswold]

You're correct. This is something. I will have to get some of these.

[Josh Arnold]

You can really get into the nooks and crannies.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. I should have got you a pair. I didn't think about it.

[Chick McGee]

Well, well, Christmas is Coming.

[Tom Griswold]

Get me the xl.

[Christy Lee]

They only have had one, so you're

[Chick McGee]

not XL hands, are you? Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Really?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

You know, they do that at the combine. They measure your hands. Like 10 inches is a big hand. We should measure our hands.

[Christy Lee]

I have teeny stubby thumb.

[Tom Griswold]

Stubby.

[Josh Arnold]

You do?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

We went down the rabbit hole of. Yeah, I was done. I'm sorry. Tell me more about your stubby hands.

[Josh Arnold]

No, no, no, no.

[Chick McGee]

I wanted to talk about you and your glorious, magnificent, feminine, yet manly hands.

[Christy Lee]

You have very long.

[Chick McGee]

You have very long fingers. That would explain your gigantic penis, I think.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, the old L trick.

[Tom Griswold]

There we go, ladies and gentlemen.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, look at that. Look at this.

[Josh Arnold]

That's very dexterous.

[Tom Griswold]

You can do that all day long now.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, a little flare there at the

[Pat Godwin]

end added to the act.

[Chick McGee]

That's a hell of an act, General.

[Tom Griswold]

That is a bar trick. That is.

[Chick McGee]

Got you deflowered, boy. Oh, I like this fun, Tom.

[Josh Arnold]

I like

[Chick McGee]

this.

[Tom Griswold]

Actually does lead to a quick story. We were talking about breakfast cereals because Josh had a glorious event this morning. When he went to eat his breakfast cereal, it was the last bit of cereal in the box, and he had the exact right amount of milk in the fridge for the bowl of cereal.

[Chick McGee]

After that, you had Christy and her magnificent dishwasher scrubbing gloves, telling you, life is good.

[Tom Griswold]

My pill caddy gave me just the five pills that I needed this morning.

[Christy Lee]

You're gonna be jealous else when I.

[Tom Griswold]

But we got talking about cereal, that. Which led to a discussion about some of the toys in cereal.

[Josh Arnold]

Man, what a great childhood memory.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, I. One of the one I got. I got the Huckleberry Hound ring. You did?

[Chick McGee]

You were engaged to Huckleberry Hound.

[Tom Griswold]

And the Huckleberry Hound ring, interestingly enough,

[Chick McGee]

was my darling, she's pregnant.

[Tom Griswold]

It was removed one school day at St. Luke's Hospital.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, from.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I thought, oh, that's right. You were.

[Chick McGee]

I world class smartass.

[Tom Griswold]

We had the. The desks that folded down.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, like a. Like a. Like how a laptop opens. Yeah, that's how the desks. I wanted to prove to my buddy Bobby McChesney that he could sit on that desk with my hand in there and it wouldn't hurt. He didn't know I had the Huckleberry Hound.

[Chick McGee]

The secret was the Huckleberry Hound.

[Tom Griswold]

Bobby sat down on that, and it proceeded to collapse, digging into my finger, and we couldn't get it off. Off. And my mother had to take me down to St. Luke's they had some device that they cut it off.

[Chick McGee]

Had that happened nowadays, you could have tie Huckleberry Hound up in litigation part two.

[Tom Griswold]

I had a. A mark on my finger from whatever metal that was made of that leached into my skin, but I'm looking at it. But speaking of rings, one of the most collectible valuable cereal box prizes is this one from 1947.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, my God.

[Chick McGee]

This is probably real gold.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

But get this. The Lone Ranger Atomic A bomb ring.

[Chick McGee]

What?

[Josh Arnold]

What was this?

[Tom Griswold]

Did you say 46, 47, 40?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Right after July 16, 1945, the sun rose twice that day. My friends.

[Tom Griswold]

It's. It's the. On top of the ring, which is kind of filigreed, there is a. A spinning atomic bomb.

[Josh Arnold]

Really?

[Christy Lee]

Is this it right here?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, that's it. It's got.

[Josh Arnold]

Why the hell would the Lone Ranger have that?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, no joke. Why would the Lone Ranger have that?

[Chick McGee]

The Lone Ranger was the foremost masked physics in this United States of America.

[Josh Arnold]

Who was that? Masked physicist.

[Chick McGee]

That's right.

[Christy Lee]

Right.

[Chick McGee]

It's the Lone Range.

[Tom Griswold]

And of course, the great story that would appear on Letterman annually.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah, Jay.

[Pat Godwin]

I forgot his last name.

[Chick McGee]

Silver Heels.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, no, not the radio guy. Radio guy.

[Josh Arnold]

And he was on a sitcom for a while too.

[Tom Griswold]

Jay Thomas, by the way, sadly gone. A great guy.

[Chick McGee]

And he.

[Tom Griswold]

I was at a radio convention thing and he, he came up to me and was just the nicest guy, but he had. If you ever get a chance, Google that Dave Letterman, he tells that Lone Ranger story. It is hilarious. It is so funny. Now, the Lone Ranger you mentioned, Jay Silverheels.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Who? Of course, anyone famous as one of what? That's right. The Osceola brothers.

[Christy Lee]

Who are the Osceola brothers?

[Tom Griswold]

If you don't know, I can't tell you.

[Christy Lee]

Is anybody else know?

[Chick McGee]

I don't know. No, I don't know, Jay. Silver Heels was in the movie Humphrey Bogart. I. I don't remember movies, like I

[Tom Griswold]

said, but you can sing that song.

[Chick McGee]

Key Largo, we had it all. Me and Bertie Higgins, Bogey and Bacall and Key Largo.

[Tom Griswold]

We had it all.

[Chick McGee]

We had it all, baby.

[Tom Griswold]

Let's say hello to the four people that are understanding what we're talking about. The Lone Ranger Atomic. A bomb ring.

[Josh Arnold]

And so it's worth some money.

[Tom Griswold]

This says it's, you know, $700.

[Chick McGee]

It's the 80th anniversary of Trinity and the nuclear. First nuclear detonation coming up in July. And by God, I'm going to go out there to Alamogordo, New Mexico.

[Christy Lee]

Are you really?

[Chick McGee]

I'm going to get a tent. I'm going.

[Tom Griswold]

Are they going to recreate it?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, maybe.

[Josh Arnold]

You got to go horseback though.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah. No, I hate. I don't like horses.

[Josh Arnold]

They. Yeah, but that's how the Oppenheimer brothers.

[Chick McGee]

I know. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oppenheimer was an expert horse.

[Chick McGee]

Oppenheimer and the Griswolds would get together like peas and carrots. I can just see it.

[Tom Griswold]

You know what Oppenheimer loved to do?

[Christy Lee]

Smoke coke.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. But also he. He loved to get his. He was one of the. He had a little.

[Chick McGee]

Get his. What?

[Tom Griswold]

Borrowed his.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. He was a martini.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. And he would. He would mix these drinks and he loved to get his guests smashed.

[Christy Lee]

Yep.

[Chick McGee]

He threw world class parties.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. Famously.

[Chick McGee]

And you know who babysat all the kids when they were. When they were at those parties? Klaus Fuchs.

[Josh Arnold]

That's exactly right. Fuchs was the great with kids.

[Chick McGee]

The double, honest to gosh. The double agent who smiled smuggled spies of the Manhattan Project information back to the Russians.

[Tom Griswold]

He's writing. Writing the soldiers. Your father say anything? Writing the innards of the bomb on a cocktail napkin.

[Chick McGee]

Just for fun, let's do a couple theorems.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Now this one. Did daddy say the captain? Excuse me, sorry. Captain Crunch. Boson whistle from 1963.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, you guys remember that?

[Christy Lee]

No, I don't, but I would.

[Tom Griswold]

You could make that. Those.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Not quite.

[Chick McGee]

Take me an hour to get it.

[Tom Griswold]

Those go for. Those go for up to $250.

[Chick McGee]

Wow.

[Christy Lee]

All right, here's one that you would like, Josh, in 1971. I do remember this. The Count Chocula and that era of cereal came out and they had the monsters go disco. Vinyl. It was a vinyl record on the back of the box. And Booberry and Count Chocolate.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah, Frankenberry.

[Chick McGee]

I would like to hear that. You know how?

[Christy Lee]

I don't know if we could find them on disco, but it's gotta be out there somewhere.

[Josh Arnold]

The General Mills Monsterverse.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, right.

[Tom Griswold]

I wonder if anybody's ever digitized.

[Christy Lee]

I was 11. I remember.

[Tom Griswold]

Suppose anybody's digitized all those cereal. Hopefully those 45s that would come with cereal.

[Chick McGee]

They've got to be out there.

[Tom Griswold]

The audio quality was somewhat less than great.

[Josh Arnold]

Did you guys ever get the one from McDonald's? I want to say it was in a Sunday newspaper or something, but. And it had the McDonald's a record. Yes, and it was a, you know, a flimsy square record you put on. And it was that Big Mac McDLT a quarter pounder with some cheese filet, a fish, a hamburger, a cheeseburger, a happy meal. You guys remember that?

[Announcer]

I remember that.

[Chick McGee]

I remember two all be Patty special sauce.

[Christy Lee]

That's what I remember.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, that was before. This was like 8 80s.

[Chick McGee]

Son of a gun.

[Josh Arnold]

And they listed everything on the menu.

[Christy Lee]

Huh.

[Tom Griswold]

And you memorized it?

[Josh Arnold]

Oh yeah, dude. I was like a chubby nine year old. It was my favorite song.

[Chick McGee]

This is the greatest song in the history of the world.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, let's move forward. Here we have coming up, comedian Kelly Collette, Al Jackson, Ali Breen with Sexy Time. That's some cool science news involving chimpanzees, chimps and hippies.

[Chick McGee]

Chimps and hippies.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, I'm in space.

[Tom Griswold]

I'd go see that movie Chimps and Hippies in Space. I'd go see Hippies in Space.

[Josh Arnold]

Just by based on the title we

[Tom Griswold]

were supposed to turn right at Mars.

[Pat Godwin]

Man.

[Chick McGee]

How many hippies you think are listening right now? What do you think? Dear Bob and Top show. Where's my. You crazy wacky radio people. Thanks for all the wonderful years. I grew up listening to you guys and. And I went to Sturgis, Michigan. If I'm not mistaken. It's. I've eaten at the HOT and now.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, are you familiar with the rabbit place?

[Chick McGee]

The Rabbit place? That's exactly right.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, the. Their mascot at HOT now was a rabbit. I.

[Christy Lee]

And they didn't serve rabbit.

[Tom Griswold]

They didn't serve rabbit.

[Josh Arnold]

You really misled us yesterday.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, because I was.

[Christy Lee]

He was trying to prove him. I was saying.

[Tom Griswold]

Saying that they lasted longer than Bunny King. Home of the hopper.

[Chick McGee]

Tom, thanks for all the wildly unique insights over the years.

[Tom Griswold]

Say that I want to show Kelly

[Chick McGee]

Jody from the wobbly northern Indiana and Michigan border what that means. But that sounds like it's an inside job.

[Tom Griswold]

I'll tell you what the. You should see people crossing that border.

[Christy Lee]

Really?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, it's like the Oklahoma land rush. They're going to get that pot in southern Michigan. They call it New Puffalo. Did you know this? Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, do they really?

[Tom Griswold]

New Buffalo, Michigan. They call it New Buffalo.

[Christy Lee]

I love that place.

[Tom Griswold]

A friend of mine. A friend of mine got pulled over by the cops and they got. Cops said to him, look, you drove by here 30 minutes ago. Now you're driving the other way. We know what you're doing.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, did they really?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, that'd be a nice little cottage

[Chick McGee]

industry, you know, like a door dash. But we're up to Michigan for you.

[Josh Arnold]

You stand kind of a mule thing.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, it is a It is.

[Christy Lee]

You know what it is a cottage industry.

[Tom Griswold]

I got a guy if you.

[Christy Lee]

I know someone, too.

[Josh Arnold]

We all know Jeff. Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, it's his. It's his brother in law. Where were we? Oh, I know. We have to check into the sporting scene.

[Chick McGee]

Is that correct? That's exactly right. And the World Baseball Classic is continuing. It's going at four separate locations all around the world. San Juan, Puerto Rico, Houston, Texas, Tokyo, Japan, and Miami, Florida. And right now, Chechnya and Korea are playing. It's the bottom of the eighth, Tom. And they are in. Chechnya and Korea. They are playing in. Let me find Korea here. It's 10 to 3. Korea ahead of Chechnya and the bottom of the eighth. What do you think of that?

[Josh Arnold]

I like it.

[Tom Griswold]

Are you betting on this?

[Chick McGee]

Yes, if you're.

[Josh Arnold]

I've got my money on the land of the morning calm.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, is that Korea?

[Tom Griswold]

Is that Korea?

[Chick McGee]

What is it?

[Tom Griswold]

The morning what?

[Josh Arnold]

Calm.

[Chick McGee]

C, A L, M. That's like perpetual spring. Colombia, the country. Columbia is always perpetual spring.

[Tom Griswold]

Wait a minute, hang on. Countries have mottos?

[Chick McGee]

Sure.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. What do we have one.

[Josh Arnold]

We do.

[Christy Lee]

Land of the free, home of the brave. What is that?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, that's our motto.

[Christy Lee]

I don't know.

[Josh Arnold]

Ours is around and find out.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, don't tread on me.

[Chick McGee]

And Venezuela is like.

[Christy Lee]

I don't know what ours is. I just made that up.

[Chick McGee]

Venezuela is a. Hey, we know how to keep our mouth shut. Come on.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, good.

[Josh Arnold]

Germany is just. You wait. We're working on something again. Everybody likes a trilogy.

[Chick McGee]

Tomorrow in Tokyo. Oh, that's true. In Tokyo, Japan and Chinese Taipei, 5am our time. And then that's where Shohei Ohtani. Hey. Still needs some work. Tokyo. Tokyo's like 14 hours ahead of us or something.

[Tom Griswold]

So this is the real World Series.

[Chick McGee]

Yes, I guess. And then the United States. Let's see, when do they play Brazil? 8 o', clock, Friday night, Eastern Daylight Time on Fox. That one's, of course, in Houston, Texas.

[Josh Arnold]

Christy, do you like guys in baseball pants?

[Christy Lee]

Sure, but can I ask a really stupid question?

[Chick McGee]

Here we go.

[Josh Arnold]

We know you can.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

I know you.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Here it comes.

[Christy Lee]

Are these.

[Tom Griswold]

No need to prove it.

[Chick McGee]

Yes. Major League Baseball players for us. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

That was not a stupid question.

[Christy Lee]

Thank you. Well, I didn't know. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you like the fact that in the Olympics the pros get to play in hockey?

[Josh Arnold]

I do. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

They play basketball, too, so why not?

[Tom Griswold]

They didn't use to.

[Christy Lee]

I know, right?

[Josh Arnold]

Right.

[Chick McGee]

There's a lot of things that some people couldn't do a long time ago.

[Josh Arnold]

Now I do. But I also do like that the. When it's not the pros.

[Christy Lee]

Right. Amateurs should have a shot.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean I guess that being an amateur these days there.

[Chick McGee]

Well, you know, they wouldn't have had the miracle on ice.

[Josh Arnold]

Exactly. With the pros.

[Chick McGee]

There's a chance they wouldn't have won that whole thing. Al Michaels would not have a career. Wait a minute.

[Tom Griswold]

What did he say?

[Josh Arnold]

Was he just a local nobody until then?

[Chick McGee]

No, no, no.

[Tom Griswold]

Sort of. He won't.

[Chick McGee]

Come on.

[Tom Griswold]

That's not the best baseball story though. Today.

[Christy Lee]

What is it?

[Chick McGee]

What is it?

[Tom Griswold]

The best baseball story comes out of the minor leagues in Wisconsin. I. This is.

[Chick McGee]

You know how minor league baseball teams change their names every now and then? Like I can't think of that one

[Tom Griswold]

that we just usually they'll do it for. What was the iguana A weekend.

[Chick McGee]

The Frozen Iguanas.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

And he got a frozen iguana hat the other day in the mail.

[Tom Griswold]

Nice.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, he's.

[Chick McGee]

He's really just like your money checked out of. He's just looking for any piece of happiness.

[Josh Arnold]

You gotta take your credit card back.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Geez.

[Christy Lee]

He spends his own money, ladies.

[Chick McGee]

Well, that's a good sign.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

A chick pointed out years ago I didn't quite understand why they would do the throwback uniforms in the NFL. Then I found out. Oh, it's because they get to merge merch in case they're short on cash. But similarly, this is a great idea. I think these are going to sell a lot.

[Chick McGee]

Well, as soon as I find it, they're to going. Going to call themselves the Drive by the the dive bars in Wisconsin. A minor league baseball team rebranding for a three game stint this summer. The lake. The Lake Country. Doc. Hounds County. Cut that out. No country or two syllables.

[Josh Arnold]

That's all I care about.

[Chick McGee]

The Lake Country. I said country again. The Lake country Dock House July 7th, 8th and 9th will become the Wisconsin Dive Bars.

[Tom Griswold]

Huh?

[Christy Lee]

That's cute.

[Chick McGee]

The announcement introduced the mascot.

[Tom Griswold]

There you go, Bart.

[Chick McGee]

The mascot's going to be Bart Tabs.

[Josh Arnold]

All right. I'm fine with that.

[Chick McGee]

He's become. He's became a local legend by running the longest tab in the state while never missing a pitch. On screen, the team explained this alternate identity is a celebration of the local establishment that have long served as gathering places for communities across Wisconsin. And I can testify to that. The first place I've had ever been. Way back when they had Jagermeister draft. You just pulled the Pulled the antlers on the end.

[Tom Griswold]

That's a cool looking jersey, though. It's kind of a.

[Chick McGee]

It's not that a good. Good blue. Blue. Very good blue.

[Tom Griswold]

Wisconsin dive bars.

[Christy Lee]

Are they cherries?

[Tom Griswold]

That's the master, Scott.

[Josh Arnold]

No, there are cherries on the sleeves.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh.

[Josh Arnold]

They're kind of the classic Pac man looking cherries.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, what is that for drinks? They go in a cocktail. Yeah. Maraschino. I don't know.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, there you go.

[Tom Griswold]

The I. Now it's a three night stand on Saturday's Deadbeat dad night. And you'll be allowed to smoke, so. And then by the way, for dive bar night, they're taking all the doors off the stove. Balls, Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah. Good. Yeah. So, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

You really get that.

[Josh Arnold]

You get that feel?

[Tom Griswold]

That feel. If a lot of really bad stuff's been happening.

[Chick McGee]

More sports coming up, including you. Ever think you'd like to steal some bowling balls? Well, really?

[Josh Arnold]

I'll do that again.

[Chick McGee]

To go with the shoes.

[Tom Griswold]

To go with the shoes you've walked out with.

[Chick McGee]

Exactly. Right. You know, they get mad if you are bowling and go outside in your bowling shoes and then come back in. They really mad.

[Tom Griswold]

That was kind of a fat had in the. In the late 80s.

[Chick McGee]

Guys.

[Tom Griswold]

Guys would show up in stolen bowling shoes. Check it out.

[Christy Lee]

You could buy them online. I mean, you could buy what looked like bowling shoes.

[Chick McGee]

I'm a 12.

[Tom Griswold]

There were guys that would get them because it had their size on the back. They think it would be impressive. They'd buy a 12 when they wore a 9. Stuff their toes. Yeah, but the Wisconsin die bars. I think this is something we should send Willie to. He could do a report from the lake country we can pay him in. What's that in Spotted cow.

[Chick McGee]

He likes spotted cow.

[Tom Griswold]

Coming up, we have a really scary hot air balloon incident. We have a kind of a Rube Goldberg death.

[Josh Arnold]

No kidding. Like a Final Destination type.

[Tom Griswold]

Exactly. Put it this way. Bollywood Wood maybe making a Final Destination movie.

[Chick McGee]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you see that story, Christy?

[Pat Godwin]

Yuck.

[Tom Griswold]

It involves one thing leading to another thing leading to another thing.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, that thing leading to it. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

They should come up with a different word for the Bollywood because those aren't movies in my book. Thank you.

[Tom Griswold]

That's a joke.

[Josh Arnold]

Two and a half hour musicals.

[Tom Griswold]

Two and a half.

[Josh Arnold]

They are so long.

[Tom Griswold]

That's a short.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

That's all coming. Coming up here in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Announcer]

For a complete copy of the Bob and Tom show contest rules, go to bob and tom.com contest rules. Or just scroll down to the bottom of the page and see contest rules. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Tom Griswold]

Square Up, a new podcast from Andre Berto.

[Chick McGee]

Yo, what's going on, man? It's Andre Berto, two time world champions

[Al Jackson]

behind the scenes of life as a professional.

[Announcer]

Box.

[Chick McGee]

People want to see more.

[Tom Griswold]

They want to see who you are as a fighter.

[Chick McGee]

Like I said, the time is now.

[Al Jackson]

I really wanted to do that. Sit down from a fighter's perspective.

[Josh Arnold]

Find out what it really means to

[Al Jackson]

be a fighter inside and outside the ring.

[Tom Griswold]

This fight game is such a roller coaster.

[Pat Godwin]

Square up, follow and listen on your favorite platform.

[Tom Griswold]

Let's go.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. We're the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios.

[Kelly Collette]

Thanks.

[Chick McGee]

Link O'Reilly Auto Parts for all your car care needs. Get the parts and service you need fast from the professional parts people at O'Reilly Auto Parts. There's Christy Lee.

[Christy Lee]

Hey.

[Chick McGee]

She's at the news Center.

[Christy Lee]

That's right.

[Chick McGee]

She, she wants to get a chopper. You know that, right?

[Josh Arnold]

I didn't know that.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Christy wants a copter to cover the news in the.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, not a motorcycle.

[Chick McGee]

You mean helicopter? Yeah, yeah, an airship.

[Christy Lee]

I've only been in one a couple times.

[Tom Griswold]

It's kind of coming up. We have airship news. Happy ending, but pretty scary.

[Chick McGee]

There's Pat Godwin.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello.

[Chick McGee]

There's Josh Arnold.

[Josh Arnold]

Hi there.

[Chick McGee]

Ace Cosby. I'm Chick. Hello, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Chick Magee at his post.

[Chick McGee]

Here we go. Sad news in sports this morning, Lou Holtz, College football Hall of Fame coach, led Notre Dame to A national championship, 249games over 33 seasons at six schools, has passed away. He was 89.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, rest in peace.

[Chick McGee]

Notre Dame announced yesterday Holtz died in Orlando, Florida, surrounded by family and friends. Let's see.

[Josh Arnold]

Seems like a very good guy.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Yeah. Remember the commercials he did for. I'm not sure what the product was, but the guy tells Lou Holtz, well, it was just, it was just a sales call. And Holtz grabs him. There's no such thing as just a sales call. That's pretty good.

[Tom Griswold]

By the way, prior to this, you had a new story about the minor league baseball team that is rebranding itself for a handful of games. A lot of them do this. It's kind of fun.

[Chick McGee]

That's right.

[Tom Griswold]

The, the, the Lake Country Dockhounds in early July will become the Wisconsin Dive Bars.

[Chick McGee]

Wisconsin Dive Bars. And they're going to be inundated with requests for merchandise that say dive bars on It.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, it's great.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, it's a good idea.

[Tom Griswold]

They've got a. There's a special parking area for dads that want to leave their kids in the car.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah, the cracked window.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. The dive bar.

[Josh Arnold]

Are you. When you guys are saying Doc hounds. Are you. Is it dachshunds? Are you. Is it Doc hounds?

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, it is.

[Chick McGee]

It is. Doc. Yes. What the hell is that? Doc? People hang out at the docks. Yeah, I guess it's late. It's.

[Tom Griswold]

They call it. It's lake country, so. So many lakes.

[Chick McGee]

B O C K H O U N. Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

I mean, I've spent some time on lakes. I've never heard that term. I like, like it now.

[Chick McGee]

I've heard a dachshund called a dash hound.

[Josh Arnold]

Sure, sure.

[Christy Lee]

Well, don't there. Don't there. Aren't there bars that are right there so you can pull your car or your. Your boat up to the dock?

[Josh Arnold]

I love that.

[Christy Lee]

Maybe that's what a dock hound is. Maybe that hangs out at the bars near the marina.

[Chick McGee]

You know, you can be arrested for a DUI with a boat.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

It needs to happen more often.

[Tom Griswold]

Some idiot drove over the dam where I used to live. Yeah, the lake country dock hounds.

[Josh Arnold]

All right, cool.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, Andy Dick.

[Chick McGee]

There we go.

[Tom Griswold]

What? Andy Dick is slightly different. You swap a couple of letters. Yeah. Pat. The reason I bring it back up is Pat. Pat grabbed me and said, I've got a song about this.

[Announcer]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

I used to love a good dive bar.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh,

[Chick McGee]

if you shut your eyes, you

[Pat Godwin]

can smell it, can't you know, where I come from, we have a million of them.

[Tom Griswold]

What?

[Pat Godwin]

On every corner back in northeastern Pennsylvania. Yeah, and I kind of miss it. I need a dive where I can hide and alky bar where it's dark inside. I'm day drinking with the real drunks, the graveyard shifters and the local punks they got pickled eggs and bags of chips. I'll have a double duck, darlin, keep the dip. The barmaid has a tattooed hip, a tongue ring and a busted lip. It's an oasis in my saving grace across the street from the check cash in place. Teeth are stained with tobacco tar you can't see for smoke in this allegar sha la la. Let me hear you sing, Josh, Give me your best time waste Sing it for my dog.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes,

[Pat Godwin]

by with a twinkle in his

[Josh Arnold]

eye he remembers the love from long ago. Her name was Mia and you know she died in his arms one night

[Pat Godwin]

the lonely hobo shut la la la la.

[Chick McGee]

Okay, that's Better than anything, Tom.

[Josh Arnold]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

But he still.

[Chick McGee]

You got this.

[Pat Godwin]

You got this.

[Chick McGee]

Go ahead.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no.

[Chick McGee]

Come on. He has a towel that smells like her. Is that. Is that what you want? Something like that.

[Pat Godwin]

I think I'll sleep it off in my parked car and in this song called the Alky Bar.

[Josh Arnold]

I sure appreciate that.

[Pat Godwin]

What do you appreciate?

[Chick McGee]

You.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, there's a thin line between love and hate.

[Josh Arnold]

I'll go to the alley and mess.

[Pat Godwin]

I'll come with you, too.

[Chick McGee]

I'll come with all of you.

[Josh Arnold]

We're sitting back to back having the spank.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, give that baby a good old yank.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Outside the Elk.

[Tom Griswold]

Cut her off right there.

[Josh Arnold]

That was Tom Bates apostrophe.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, my goodness.

[Tom Griswold]

That took a turn. I almost took it. I almost made it worse.

[Pat Godwin]

You had a twinkle in your eye.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I. Then I said, no, no, not. We're not going there.

[Chick McGee]

More sports coming up.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Christy Lee]

Well, my dad hung out in a great old dive bar like that.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, yeah?

[Christy Lee]

He tore it down. It's kind of sad.

[Chick McGee]

My grandmother would take me to the Palm Grill on Main Street, London, Ohio, and I'd have the beef Manhattan and all the butter I wanted. Nice. Oh, man. And she'd have her little juice glass with beer in it. About nine dozen of those.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Sundays in Pennsylvania, my dad would knock on the back door. There was a secret kind of word, you know, you lifted up the thing. And I would go in with him, have a. A real ginger ale. Like homemade ginger ale.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. But they did. They'd serve them and they'd serve a can with that little glass that looked like a juice glass.

[Chick McGee]

Yep.

[Christy Lee]

Pour your beer in that. Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

And they'd let you go in there even though you were a kid.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

The North End Tavern, Ohio. Yeah. Kids can be.

[Christy Lee]

I was an adult when I hung out with.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah. Oh, wow.

[Kelly Collette]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

You can't do that here now.

[Tom Griswold]

Check local listings. Coming up, we have a comedian Kelly Collette, comedian Al Jackson, comedian Ali Breen with Sexy Time, a couple really interesting stories in the news, and a little bit more sports on the way from the orangeinsouls.com sports desk. These are the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Announcer]

Hey, thanks for listening this morning. Got something to say? Send us an email. Bob and tom. Bob and tom.com.

[Christy Lee]

tired of partisan noise?

[Tom Griswold]

America's more divided than ever. But independent Americans is adding light to contrast all that heat.

[Christy Lee]

Independent Americans. Daily News with Army veteran Paul Rykoff.

[Tom Griswold]

Pressing issues of the day with leaders who are Shaping what America will be in the future. We're going to bring the righteous media five eyes. Independence, integrity, information, inspiration and impact.

[Christy Lee]

Join the movement. Independent Americans from believe. Follow and listen on your favorite platform away.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Top show where you're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. There's Christy Lee at the news center.

[Christy Lee]

Hello, Chick McGee.

[Chick McGee]

There's Pat Godwin.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey, Chick.

[Chick McGee]

Hello, Josh Arnold.

[Josh Arnold]

Hi.

[Chick McGee]

There's Ace Cosby. Howdy. I'm Chick McGee at the orangeinsouls.com sports desk. And Tom, we have a special guest

[Tom Griswold]

joining us in the studio. She is comedian Kelly Collette.

[Kelly Collette]

Hi, everybody.

[Josh Arnold]

Hi, Kelly.

[Chick McGee]

Good to see you guys again.

[Josh Arnold]

You, too.

[Tom Griswold]

Is that a real name or a fake name?

[Kelly Collette]

It's a fake name.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Kelly Collette]

Yeah. Toni Collette, the actress. I just think she's fabulous. There was a character on a TV show called Friday Night Lights, Tara Collette, who I thought was very good.

[Christy Lee]

So, yeah, Colette's my favorite name. I love that name.

[Chick McGee]

Is that right?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Really?

[Christy Lee]

I wanted to name one of my daughters Colette, but I got out ruled.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, Colette's a friend of yours who cries all the time.

[Christy Lee]

She doesn't cry all the time.

[Chick McGee]

No, she looks like she cries all the time.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, that's.

[Chick McGee]

I didn't make it up. I just. I just observed.

[Kelly Collette]

I'm the friend, right?

[Christy Lee]

Yes, you're my friend.

[Kelly Collette]

Exactly.

[Christy Lee]

Do you cry all the time?

[Kelly Collette]

I cry all the time.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, okay.

[Chick McGee]

Did you think of going with Colette?

[Kelly Collette]

Colette thought about it.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Kelly Collette]

Yeah, I. I just. It was also my confirmation name.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh.

[Kelly Collette]

So I picked it for myself when I was like, 13. And then my first open mic, I was like, I think I'm gonna say things that are gonna haunt me forever, so I better use a fake name.

[Christy Lee]

You could have gone Colette Kelly.

[Kelly Collette]

I think I actually looked that up and there was like two Colette Kelly's in the town.

[Tom Griswold]

So I was like, wow, there's another Christy Lee. Isn't she a stripper?

[Christy Lee]

Probably.

[Tom Griswold]

No, seriously.

[Chick McGee]

I think there is. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. No, she spells the same way.

[Tom Griswold]

K, R, I, S, T, I. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Wow.

[Christy Lee]

I have a fake name, too.

[Tom Griswold]

Is she an adult actress?

[Christy Lee]

I don't know. There's a songwriter, singer.

[Chick McGee]

Don't you get Asian? Asian organization, mail, stuff like that, asking you to join?

[Christy Lee]

I do not.

[Chick McGee]

Egg roll of the month. Right.

[Tom Griswold]

All right.

[Chick McGee]

Christy Lee.

[Josh Arnold]

Egg roll of the month, was it?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, let him, let him, let him. It. Dang. Hanging himself.

[Chick McGee]

Each and every month you get an egg roll. A Different one. Well, that's where they. They wanted to.

[Christy Lee]

Egg rolls.

[Josh Arnold]

In fact, they had a recent article about the difference between egg and spring, which I thought was really fascinating.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

Spring pearls tend to be a little smaller.

[Chick McGee]

They cover that. Yeah, that's why they do.

[Christy Lee]

They're a little tighter and the pastry's a little lighter.

[Tom Griswold]

Keep it up, fellas.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, why don't you tell us.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Hi, Kelly.

[Kelly Collette]

Hi.

[Tom Griswold]

So is your real name like clunky and awful and weird?

[Kelly Collette]

My real name? Oh, I

[Tom Griswold]

have to say it.

[Chick McGee]

Gladys Everheart.

[Kelly Collette]

It's really short. It's only four letters. So. But. But people would always spell it wrong too. Oh, and they would always put an H in it when there's no H. So my hairy.

[Tom Griswold]

So it's.

[Al Jackson]

So it's.

[Chick McGee]

Well, the only guess I have. Sit. You better put an hd.

[Josh Arnold]

Stop putting an H in there, please.

[Chick McGee]

Can I tell you about this in sports?

[Christy Lee]

How about yes, please.

[Chick McGee]

I wish you would. Patriots have informed. That's the NFL. New England Patriots said two wide receivers. Stefan Diggs. Get out of here and don't let the door hit you in the ass. Diggs posted a goodbye on social media as is their want. Now he led the team with 85 catches, over a thousand yards receiving, four touchdowns last year in New England. But they said no thank you. And the Chiefs and Rams have agreed on a trade. This is for NFL fans, so you can check out on this. Tom, brand new, way ahead of you. Big time star Trent McDuffie, formerly of the Chiefs. Now he's a Los Angeles Ram. Let's see where. Oh, we all know that Miles Garrett is defensive player of the year and an amazing physical athlete, but I understand

[Tom Griswold]

he's going to be driving at Indy this year.

[Chick McGee]

That's exactly right. 2025 Defensive Player of the year cited for driving. He was in a 70 mile per hour zone on I71 in Congress Township, Ohio. That's some good speed in there.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, nice.

[Chick McGee]

71. 70 miles an hour zone. Let's start the bidding. How fast you think he was going?

[Christy Lee]

I would say 90.

[Josh Arnold]

Going one. 110.

[Chick McGee]

Mighty. 110.

[Christy Lee]

102.

[Al Jackson]

97.

[Chick McGee]

94 miles an hour. Which is.

[Christy Lee]

That's fine.

[Josh Arnold]

Christy was the closest without going.

[Tom Griswold]

Am I correct? I. I don't have this story, but didn't. Isn't this. Hasn't he had multiple speeding violations?

[Chick McGee]

No, no, no. The speeding ticket. This one marks the ninth time. Okay, Garrett, there you go.

[Josh Arnold]

You know what should come into play though?

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

What was he listening to there should be exceptions.

[Christy Lee]

What was he driving? Is the more important question.

[Chick McGee]

Let's see. It doesn't say, but it was a 92 Ford Taurus. He had a scary moment. Speeding ticket marks the ninth time since Garrett's entered the NFL this rookie season, 2017. And among those speeding tickets, a scary moment. He flipped his Porsche in 2022, an incident where he. Speeding was a factor.

[Tom Griswold]

So he's learned his lesson.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. He and Tiger woods both.

[Chick McGee]

Here we go. Yes. Chrissy Garrett was also driving. Driving a Porsche during this traffic.

[Christy Lee]

Was he really?

[Chick McGee]

The Wayne County Sheriff's office pulled over the brown star. He was going 24 miles per hour over the speed.

[Josh Arnold]

They call him a brown star.

[Chick McGee]

To me, it was like the cop would go, hey, hey, let's slow it down and let you go.

[Christy Lee]

Are you serious?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, a 70.

[Josh Arnold]

And so you'd be a little more lenient because of the Porsche or because

[Chick McGee]

he's a player and because I'm an NFL fan and it's Miles Garrett, you go get him.

[Tom Griswold]

All right.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, why not? You think he looked it up and then found out it was the ninth time he'd been stopped?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, they're probably when he typed in the driver's license. It probably. Probably is like a Vegas jackpot.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, by the way, prior to this ticket, Garrett pulled over during Brown's training camp back on August 9th of 25, when he was driving 100 miles per hour in a 60 mile per hour zone in Strongsville, Ohio. Mile which is near the team's Berea training facility. They've got to change the name of that town.

[Kelly Collette]

Is that Berea? Is it Berea?

[Chick McGee]

It is.

[Tom Griswold]

It is Berea,

[Christy Lee]

Kentucky.

[Kelly Collette]

Is a Porsche something that, like, you just, like, touch the gas pedal and it just goes really fast? Or did he have to, like.

[Josh Arnold]

Right. Does he need a lead foot or

[Tom Griswold]

does it just kind of automatically dictate their grip?

[Kelly Collette]

Because it can't be like, I sneezed. They are awesome or whatever.

[Christy Lee]

They are awesome.

[Tom Griswold]

You drive one, you'll. You'll see why.

[Kelly Collette]

I'll just get the one. You guys get one.

[Josh Arnold]

For me to drive a Porsche, I'd have to change so many facets of my life.

[Christy Lee]

A new job would be the. So many things would have to change.

[Pat Godwin]

New girlfriend size.

[Josh Arnold]

I mean, there are many things that would have.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, no, you could. They make a really nice suv.

[Christy Lee]

Well, it's not the same.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, it is. Are you kidding? Have you ever driven one of those things? It's a rocket ship.

[Chick McGee]

I've never have, and I Don't. I'd like the little sports car. I wouldn't like the Cayenne.

[Tom Griswold]

No, see the Cayenne, the SV chick, the sports car. The problem with that for you and me would be getting out of it.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, that's.

[Tom Griswold]

We can get in creaky and creaky. You do the spin, then you just fall. Gravity is going to put your ass in the seat.

[Pat Godwin]

I heard the Cayenne is a peppier car. Cayenne, peppier.

[Chick McGee]

She's a guest. She feels sorry for you.

[Josh Arnold]

We're on day number two here.

[Tom Griswold]

We're enjoying the.

[Kelly Collette]

Is there a lot of. A lot of pockets.

[Pat Godwin]

Puns, really.

[Tom Griswold]

We enjoy a nice pun, but we prefer them to stick the landing, if you will.

[Josh Arnold]

A lot of almost jokes.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Kelly Collette]

You could have said, it's a hot car. It's a pepper. It's a pepier.

[Tom Griswold]

Don't try to fix this one.

[Kelly Collette]

Let me just punch it up real quick.

[Tom Griswold]

Those are great cars. They are very fast.

[Christy Lee]

Cayenne is an suv.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. But I wouldn't be surprised if that's what he was in because he's a pretty big football player layer.

[Chick McGee]

There's a lot of room in those cabins.

[Christy Lee]

You'd be surprised once you're in it. Yeah. And he can get up and down. He's athletic.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, he could do it. He could probably pick up the Porsche and put it him. What do I want?

[Tom Griswold]

I had to.

[Josh Arnold]

You can wrap it around him.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

I had a. What do you call them? Sedan.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

That I had to. The. The loaner car when I took my. I've been driving suburbans, etc. Etc. For the last 35 years.

[Chick McGee]

SUV.

[Tom Griswold]

And I just don't drive cars, regular car cars. And I'm getting out of. It was kind of tricky.

[Christy Lee]

Well, I don't want to call you out, but your knees aren't exactly. Well, that's the best.

[Tom Griswold]

They're great. I work on them.

[Christy Lee]

Well, I know you work on them, honey, but they're kind of creaky.

[Tom Griswold]

But I think the other point someone made was I think that the police should consider what song they're listening to while driving.

[Josh Arnold]

Always.

[Tom Griswold]

That should be Tom Petty Running down a dream. At least 20 miles an hour.

[Christy Lee]

Radar Love. Golden Airing. That's. Yeah, that's the song.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, both of those. You knock off some. Some time.

[Tom Griswold]

Take it easy. The Eagles. That's a solid 15 miles.

[Josh Arnold]

That's a joke.

[Christy Lee]

What are you talking about?

[Pat Godwin]

Color My World by Chicago.

[Christy Lee]

Maybe it's Life in the Fast Lane by the Eagles.

[Josh Arnold]

Take it easy. It's the opposite of.

[Chick McGee]

What about Sometimes When We Touch by Dan Hill. Oh, that's a speeding song.

[Josh Arnold]

That's the one.

[Tom Griswold]

You want to speak to a cliff. Sorry. Ahead.

[Chick McGee]

Make fun.

[Tom Griswold]

Possibly the worst song of all time.

[Pat Godwin]

I agree.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

That's probably how many people have Felman Louise their way off a cliff because of that song.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, you know. Life, really. If this is what they're offering, I'm.

[Josh Arnold]

When we touch well, we're dead, Honey.

[Chick McGee]

The honesty.

[Josh Arnold]

Too much.

[Pat Godwin]

I want to hold you till I die Till we both break down and cry but you've already died.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, so I can't cry. Exactly.

[Tom Griswold]

You ever seen that?

[Christy Lee]

That guy?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yikes.

[Josh Arnold]

What's his name?

[Tom Griswold]

Louise, let's move forward here. We're hanging out with a comedian. Kelly. Colette.

[Pat Godwin]

Kelly, you know this song?

[Kelly Collette]

I love this song. It was on the Superstar by Molly Shannon.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah.

[Kelly Collette]

She sings that. So that's how I learned it.

[Tom Griswold]

Ironically, she sings it.

[Chick McGee]

Also in the NFL. Aaron Rodgers. Yeah. That guy says he still has not made a decision about his future. This is only the seventh year in a row we've had to listen to Aaron decide. I don't know if I'm playing next year.

[Josh Arnold]

I kind of blame the people who keep asking.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, that's true. Enabled. You're right.

[Kelly Collette]

It's like. It's like a band that. They're like, one more tour, and they're like, only if you beg me and keep asking about it.

[Josh Arnold]

You think he likes it?

[Kelly Collette]

I think he loves it.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, Aaron. Aaron is set to hit free agency in less than a week, confirmed the Steelers had not given him a deadline to inform them of his intentions for the upcoming season. He told our buddy Pat McAfee, I'm enjoying my time with my wife and enjoying this part of the season.

[Tom Griswold]

Good.

[Chick McGee]

Wait a minute.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, good for him.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

He got enjoying time with his wife.

[Christy Lee]

He's never announced.

[Kelly Collette]

Isn't she like Shanae Woodley?

[Christy Lee]

No, they broke up. He married this girl. And no one.

[Tom Griswold]

He's got his private life. Keep it private. I think it's great. I mean, what's the alternative? Do the Brett Favre thing, play for the Vikings, and send a picture of your male member to some reporter under an alias.

[Christy Lee]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

While defrauding those in Mississippi on welfare.

[Chick McGee]

Every guy out there has seen that picture. And when you say that, we all remember the oddness of his most private area.

[Tom Griswold]

Like a squished mushroom.

[Chick McGee]

This is fine.

[Kelly Collette]

Wait, is the photo out there so odd?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

I never saw it.

[Christy Lee]

You don't want to see it.

[Josh Arnold]

You don't want to?

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

You'll want a pizza with mushrooms on it.

[Chick McGee]

It's not kind of an angle a little bit.

[Josh Arnold]

Was he correct?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

I was going to say who sends a flaccid deep.

[Chick McGee]

You know, the helmet is normally goes when it is on the shoulder.

[Kelly Collette]

On the shoulder.

[Tom Griswold]

You can go see it.

[Chick McGee]

Jason.

[Tom Griswold]

Jason has it. It's his wallpaper on his.

[Chick McGee]

It's a almost a flat helmet. It's hard to explain.

[Tom Griswold]

Authorities is he found guilty of defrauding the Mississippi.

[Chick McGee]

Bowling balls and sports coming.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, back with that. Speaking of car cars.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Let's talk about some great cars from our car girl, Christy Lee. She's the Hyundai driver.

[Christy Lee]

That's right.

[Tom Griswold]

Tell me more.

[Christy Lee]

I love my Hyundai. And right now, Hyundai is having a getaway sales event. Get away with the deal. So right it almost feels wrong. That's a song, isn't it? Including the adventure ready SUVs like the Hyundai Santa Fe or Santa Fe hybrid. The Tucson, my favorite. The Tucson hybrid, which I've been driving for two years plus and absolutely love. And then don't forget the bold and stylish Elantra loaded with the latest in auto technology. Or go all electric with the Ionic 5 or the Ionic 9. Get down to your local Hyundai dealer. They have all the details.

[Chick McGee]

Isn't it Ionic, don't you think?

[Josh Arnold]

It's like Rain Ride.

[Christy Lee]

You're gonna get a deal you'll love. During the Hyundai getaway sales event.

[Josh Arnold]

It's like 10,000 spoons with all you need. Everybody is. Yeah, Tom. It's meeting the man of my dreams

[Christy Lee]

and then meeting 10,000 spoons.

[Tom Griswold]

What are you, a heroin addict when

[Josh Arnold]

all you need is a knife? Visit the opposite of her.

[Kelly Collette]

You can cut things with a spoon.

[Christy Lee]

Visit Hyundai USA.com for details and an Alanis Morissette CD. That's Hyundai USA.com it comes with a

[Josh Arnold]

copy of Jagged Little Pill.

[Christy Lee]

Sure.

[Tom Griswold]

A CD offer Void in America. Thank you very much. Much. Now we're going to come back, hang out with Kelly Colette. Also coming up, Al Jackson, Ally Breen with Sexy Time. We are in the O Auto Part Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Josh Arnold]

What?

[Chick McGee]

No, not yet. Said it again. Hi. Welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. I've got your back, pal. There's no. I said I'm sorry. Don't worry about it. That's. There's Christy Lee at the news desk.

[Christy Lee]

Hello, chick.

[Chick McGee]

There's Pat Godwin. Hey, Chick. Hey, look, there's Josh Arnold.

[Tom Griswold]

Hi.

[Chick McGee]

Ace Cosby's here. Hey, I'm Chick. And hello. Tom. We got a comedian guest.

[Tom Griswold]

That's right.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Sitting right next to you@the orangeinsouls.com sports desk as we get ready for the NCAA basketball tournaments.

[Chick McGee]

It's crazy.

[Tom Griswold]

Kelly Collette has joined us in the studio.

[Kelly Collette]

Greetings and salutations.

[Christy Lee]

Hi, Kelly.

[Tom Griswold]

By way of back background. I'm trying to remember married or a veteran of marriage?

[Kelly Collette]

Veteran of marriage.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Kelly Collette]

Yeah. Fifteen years did it.

[Josh Arnold]

Thank you for your committed.

[Kelly Collette]

Yep, yep. And now I teach.

[Chick McGee]

Wait a minute.

[Kelly Collette]

No, I'm just kidding. That's what you do after you stop.

[Tom Griswold]

Right.

[Kelly Collette]

Those who can't. Right. I give advice.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I see kids.

[Kelly Collette]

No kids. People keep asking me, though. They keep saying, are you trying? They say it like that, are you trying? And I was like, I'm trying. Okay. They don't get in your car as easy as it did in the 80s. But I'm trying to get. A couple smart ones wanted to teach me how to use my iPad. That would probably be better.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, it's very handy.

[Christy Lee]

That's what you do, kids, right, Tom?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, tremendously handy. That's how I was able to load the. The aura frame over there. Finn came in and walked me through it.

[Chick McGee]

Let me see that, Daddy.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. Thank you, Daddy. Now, you're gonna be joining us, I understand, for our special broadcast for opening day in Cincinnati.

[Kelly Collette]

So excited. I've been a lifelong Reds fan. I used to work for them. Them many roles I've had for the Cincinnati Reds.

[Josh Arnold]

She put her a center fielder for a while.

[Kelly Collette]

I wish I was. I was on the rally pack. Those are the people that shoot the T shirts off the dugouts.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah.

[Kelly Collette]

I was the mascot twice when Rosie Red was first introduced. They have a lot of funny stories for that.

[Chick McGee]

Do you remember how excited we were the first time Mr. Red and Rosie Red came over and they came over here.

[Christy Lee]

They came to our opening day.

[Chick McGee]

Well, they come every year now.

[Josh Arnold]

Are they made married?

[Kelly Collette]

I. I think it's complicated because Mr. Red Legs is also there with the mustache. And he's a lot of. A lot of dapper energy.

[Chick McGee]

He's all man.

[Josh Arnold]

I heard he was on the Epstein.

[Kelly Collette]

Not scapper Josh.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

I miss her.

[Chick McGee]

I'm sorry.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, before we get back to Kelly, did you have something you wanted to say in the world of sports?

[Chick McGee]

Yes, I did.

[Tom Griswold]

Some kind of a surprise.

[Chick McGee]

A Michigan ski resort. Resort. I'm not sure what you're talking about. There. But I'll tell you this up in the up, Tom. The Keweenaw Peninsula has canceled portions of their upcoming Mardi Gras Madness event after being threatened with legal action.

[Josh Arnold]

We'll sue you.

[Chick McGee]

The Mount Bohemia Ski Resort said it canceled Free Skiing for Women and Women's Only beads contest on the advice of their legal counsel after receiving an email stating that the promotions exposed the Resources resort to potential civil complaints from guys

[Christy Lee]

they have to ski topless to get.

[Chick McGee]

This would have been expensive and time consuming litigation, even though we would expect to prevail.

[Kelly Collette]

Can you imagine trying to flash someone with a big snow suit on, just held like layers with your mittens? Just trying to.

[Tom Griswold]

It's happened.

[Kelly Collette]

Pull them out.

[Tom Griswold]

As a skier, I can assure you.

[Chick McGee]

Anonymous emailer wrote lift access. Tom, you can explain these words to us. In the world of skiing, lift access is the core service of resort. Offering that service free of charge to one sex while charging the other constitutes differential treatment based solely on sex.

[Josh Arnold]

I.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

But I can't imagine anybody getting upset. No. You know, guys.

[Tom Griswold]

Dear Buzz Kill Homo.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, boy, he's.

[Kelly Collette]

The same thing happened when they.

[Josh Arnold]

That was a failed mascot for a minor league team. The same thing happened. What they would.

[Kelly Collette]

They would do like happy hour where women drink for free and guys would complain and they would. The bars would be like. The bars. I'm like, dude, this is for you.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, like, they wouldn't come.

[Chick McGee]

No kidding.

[Kelly Collette]

Otherwise guys would just be looking at each other.

[Chick McGee]

Now, don't forget Mardi Gras Madness at the Mount Bohemia Ski Resort also includes live music, activities and a limbo contest. Oh, how about that? I've never been in a limbo contest.

[Josh Arnold]

Really?

[Christy Lee]

I've been.

[Kelly Collette]

Not in skating.

[Pat Godwin]

Have you seen one at all?

[Chick McGee]

I don't think so. I have seen.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, they do them at the roller skating rink a lot.

[Chick McGee]

Was it C1 do one, teach one, right?

[Josh Arnold]

That's right.

[Kelly Collette]

You've never been on a terrible cruise.

[Tom Griswold]

No, but I want.

[Chick McGee]

I want to. Chrissy's, I think, trying to trap me into going on a cruise because she didn't have a good time, but she's telling me how great it was.

[Christy Lee]

I had a great time. Are you kidding me?

[Tom Griswold]

Now the limbo.

[Christy Lee]

But I go on a different kind of cruise.

[Tom Griswold]

Have you seen the limbo? The limbo, as you mentioned, on roller skates?

[Christy Lee]

Yes, that cool.

[Tom Griswold]

Amazing. Yeah, they have to kind of spread eagle and.

[Christy Lee]

God, I love roller skating. I wish you could do that. Now you can.

[Kelly Collette]

You can rent out. I did it for my birthday. I rented out an entire roller skating rink and just invited a bunch of people.

[Christy Lee]

Really?

[Kelly Collette]

So fun.

[Chick McGee]

That is fun. Tom, did you get.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I didn't get the invite.

[Chick McGee]

No, Christy, you must have.

[Kelly Collette]

I wanted to win the limbo contest, so I knew not to invite you guys.

[Tom Griswold]

You probably win it in this room.

[Christy Lee]

I don't know.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, you just.

[Christy Lee]

My back doesn't.

[Chick McGee]

No, no, you just have to walk over, and you'd be right underneath the window.

[Pat Godwin]

You just walk right under him.

[Chick McGee]

Authorities in Colorado, one of our nicer states, says A thief stole 17 bowling balls from a professional bowler's front porch.

[Christy Lee]

Why did he have 17 bowling balls on his porch?

[Josh Arnold]

Let's not blame the victim here.

[Tom Griswold]

Do you have a. You use multiple balls right now?

[Josh Arnold]

I mean, yeah, but usually it's only, like, two.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Kelly Collette]

Why would.

[Josh Arnold]

I mean, I guess you could have as many.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, the guy, he probably has practice balls.

[Christy Lee]

Well, of course, but why would they be on your front porch?

[Chick McGee]

Well, where would you put them?

[Josh Arnold]

How else would people know you were a professional?

[Chick McGee]

You certainly would be proud of them. Of course, you.

[Tom Griswold]

Maybe he got home late, got out of. Got out of an Uber. Put them in the porch. I'll get these tomorrow. I don't know.

[Josh Arnold]

Tell me you're a bowler without telling me you're a bowler. You just put them.

[Chick McGee]

Just leave the box up there. By my third bowling ball, according to reports, Stephen Gallegos, the professional bowler who lived in the house, he's been on the tour for 42 years. Wow.

[Josh Arnold]

He's a legend.

[Chick McGee]

Gallegos said he left the equipment, the bowling balls on the porch of his Denver home to move in in the morning, but woke up to find.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, there you go.

[Chick McGee]

That about 255 pounds of equipment had been hauled away overnight.

[Christy Lee]

Bummer.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, you never know when a bowling thief is going to strike.

[Josh Arnold]

You're exactly right.

[Chick McGee]

You're right.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, spare me the moaning, okay?

[Pat Godwin]

Spare me the moaning.

[Chick McGee]

Is there anything you can't do? My God.

[Christy Lee]

They probably found.

[Chick McGee]

Magnificent.

[Christy Lee]

They probably found them all in the gutter.

[Josh Arnold]

They may have. Yeah. I mean, this is.

[Chick McGee]

Yes. Yes. Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, no, I'm.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm just.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

Andy, I'm not.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm just yesing. I got nothing to offer.

[Tom Griswold]

They're.

[Chick McGee]

They're.

[Tom Griswold]

Look, the suspect. They're looking for a. A Polish white guy in his late 50s.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, is that who they're going to pin it on?

[Tom Griswold]

There we go. You got it.

[Chick McGee]

How about this? You like a Kit Kat? Kit Kat Candy bars?

[Christy Lee]

Love a Kit Kat.

[Josh Arnold]

Very much so. And right now we have Kit Kat rabbits.

[Christy Lee]

Kit Kat bunnies.

[Chick McGee]

I know.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Bunnies. I thought they were rabbits.

[Christy Lee]

What's the difference?

[Josh Arnold]

I'm allergic to bunnies.

[Chick McGee]

Kit Kat Cat kicked off the Formula one season by debuting a gigantic chocolate car.

[Josh Arnold]

Really?

[Chick McGee]

Candy Brand said the handcrafted F1 model chocolate car was unwrapped in quotes at the Silverstone circuit in England.

[Josh Arnold]

Is it a kit Cadillac created? That deserves more. You sons of.

[Kelly Collette]

I got it.

[Christy Lee]

Especially since Cadillac is new to the F1 circuit this year and you didn't even know that.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm very good.

[Christy Lee]

Very good.

[Chick McGee]

Created by a team led by. By master chocolatier Jen Lindsay Clark. Oh. The car is the equivalent of over 16,902 finger KitKat bars.

[Christy Lee]

Do we have a picture of that?

[Chick McGee]

I got a thousand four hundred.

[Tom Griswold]

Look at that. There's a picture and it. And it looks just like an F1 car. It's amazing.

[Josh Arnold]

It's pretty beautiful.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Kelly Collette]

Today I learned that they. They divide Kit Kat bars by finger.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Kelly Collette]

That's how they measure them.

[Chick McGee]

That's what they call that in the business. There are four fingers on a Kit Kat bar.

[Christy Lee]

I only eat one finger at a time.

[Al Jackson]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

They originally tried to do it with Baby Ruth.

[Josh Arnold]

Really?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. But it just looked like a brontosaurus. Took a dump. Didn't really have anything.

[Kelly Collette]

That looks delicious.

[Tom Griswold]

Actually, the sculpt. Appealing is the sculpted feel of it.

[Christy Lee]

It kind of looked like it was made out of mud to me.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. It's chocolate. It's awesome.

[Josh Arnold]

Now, are there wafers in there and everything? That's. It's all Kit Kat.

[Chick McGee]

I mean, the cookie part of it.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Well, of course.

[Josh Arnold]

All right.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

All right.

[Josh Arnold]

How about that?

[Christy Lee]

Now, what are they going to do with it?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, F1 leading to. Leading to type 2.

[Kelly Collette]

Keep the dogs away from it.

[Tom Griswold]

Eat enough of that thing that. Sports. Tom, thank you very much. You're welcome. I certainly appreciate that. Chick magee. At the orangeinsouls.com sports desk, we're hanging out with comedian Kelly Collette. She's got a little tour going here. Stops include Bloomington, Cincinnati, St. Louis and Indy. And we're also going to be talking to in person person on opening day for the Cincinnati Reds. A special edition of this show coming to you from Smoke justice officially in Covington, Kentucky. It's a great spot. We telling you about where we're going to be planning. We have some other special guests and some other cool stuff going on there. So you've established a couple things. You are.

[Christy Lee]

We're gonna save Your mascot stories for that.

[Kelly Collette]

I also.

[Christy Lee]

People hang.

[Kelly Collette]

I also gave Pete Rose's hall of fame jacket.

[Chick McGee]

Man, I'm glad you said I gave him a boy.

[Tom Griswold]

I didn't know where that was going. Oh, boy, oh, boy.

[Kelly Collette]

Two finger Kit Kat.

[Christy Lee]

That's what I gave him.

[Tom Griswold]

Two. Two finger. Okay, just. Let's move right along.

[Chick McGee]

So you're a single.

[Tom Griswold]

You're a single gal.

[Kelly Collette]

I got a boyfriend.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Nice.

[Kelly Collette]

He's fun.

[Josh Arnold]

Is he a civilian?

[Kelly Collette]

He is. Well, he's. So I teach stand up comedy and he's taking my class, so we're probably going to have to break up afterwards because I don't want to be a comedian.

[Tom Griswold]

Easy A. Yeah, yeah.

[Kelly Collette]

But it's good because he's gonna try it so he can stop being like, you know, I could try. I'm like, you see how hard it is now?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Get it out of his system.

[Kelly Collette]

Exactly. Yeah. So that'll be fun to watch.

[Tom Griswold]

Are you living in the same house with him?

[Kelly Collette]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Kelly Collette]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

Have you stayed at his place?

[Kelly Collette]

I. He's. He's living in his cat car.

[Chick McGee]

Do you have any toiletries at his place or.

[Kelly Collette]

That's a good question. I think I have a toothbrush over there.

[Josh Arnold]

All right. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Cause you wouldn't want to borrow his toothbrush.

[Kelly Collette]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

Done. Is

[Kelly Collette]

you.

[Josh Arnold]

Can't you make out? You still don't want to borrow somebody's toothbrush?

[Christy Lee]

Do you use Kelly's toothbrush? Thank you.

[Chick McGee]

Wait a minute.

[Tom Griswold]

Shower cap.

[Chick McGee]

And she doesn't know.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't. No. No, I don't use her toothbrush.

[Christy Lee]

No, of course.

[Tom Griswold]

But I mean, in a pinch, I

[Josh Arnold]

think you'll use somebody else in the.

[Tom Griswold]

In the early dating days.

[Josh Arnold]

Never.

[Tom Griswold]

I would imagine that I'm not going to get into the the. Where one would be origining the DNA that he has. But you. What about.

[Chick McGee]

What about washcloths? Would you share washcloths?

[Josh Arnold]

Boy, that's a tough one, too. And I'm not a huge germaphobe, but sharing a toothbrush is. The answer is never.

[Chick McGee]

Never, never.

[Tom Griswold]

What about an enema nozzle?

[Josh Arnold]

The answer is, hey, you know what?

[Chick McGee]

I like to go wet and wild and I. Let me see what kind of nozzle you got. Maybe we can free you.

[Kelly Collette]

Just. You just made me think of something, like, clever. Like, if you need to, like, pass a message on to your person, you can be like, oh, you left your deodorant over here, and just hand them a deodorant. Like a little.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, I see what you're saying.

[Kelly Collette]

You Know what I mean? You can just start stocking the toiletries at your house that you want them to use and just be like, hey, you forgot your.

[Chick McGee]

Well, baby, you smell like potato soup.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, so what you're saying. You're saying that you have, like, a kit for away games.

[Kelly Collette]

That would be good, right? I saw these things on dating apps where, like, a guy will send you with, like, a kit after a night out with, like, a. Like a. Like, cab money, like a protein bar, like, stuff like that.

[Christy Lee]

Like, that's electrolytes.

[Josh Arnold]

What are your thoughts on that?

[Kelly Collette]

I don't know. I think that's thoughtful, man.

[Christy Lee]

It's like a swag bag, I think.

[Kelly Collette]

A swag bag. But you. You have to assume that he does this a lot and got. Got a lot of complaints. Like, he kicked me out without any breakfast. He's like, here's your breakfast. Everybody can get some. Everybody.

[Josh Arnold]

There's a little nature's heart.

[Kelly Collette]

Exactly.

[Pat Godwin]

Is that a Jeter move or a rod?

[Christy Lee]

Who is the Jeter move?

[Josh Arnold]

He legitimately. I mean, I think it was a. You sign the NDA and then you get your swag back.

[Christy Lee]

Right.

[Chick McGee]

And it was a cool swag bag, too. I think they got signed balls.

[Tom Griswold]

Nike, some cleats, prescription for.

[Chick McGee]

For just in case. Little Val. Tr.

[Christy Lee]

Little plan B.

[Chick McGee]

A little plan B. Said Christie.

[Kelly Collette]

Lowercase.

[Tom Griswold]

Well. Well, now we're hanging out with.

[Christy Lee]

He was a condom guy. Really?

[Kelly Collette]

Which guy?

[Pat Godwin]

Jeter.

[Chick McGee]

Probably not.

[Tom Griswold]

Wait a minute. Was he the golden.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, this is a great. Kelly, you haven't heard this song.

[Kelly Collette]

The golden.

[Josh Arnold]

He didn't finish the. Yeah, yeah.

[Kelly Collette]

Okay. He just.

[Tom Griswold]

Golden thong.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, He. To break a slump, right?

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, he wore a thong, famously.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Kelly Collette]

And he never took it off.

[Christy Lee]

Well, he took it off.

[Josh Arnold]

He just wore it on the right times.

[Tom Griswold]

Apparently there was a. He told the story on, I think, the Tonight Show. Derek. Here's the story. Derek Jeter was in a pretty bad slump, and he was on the Tonight show and with Fallon, and he said, quote, I once wore a thong in front of thousands of people.

[Josh Arnold]

I once wore a thong.

[Chick McGee]

Okay, you did it once this morning. Morning.

[Tom Griswold]

He explained one of his teammates told him that wearing a gold thong would get him out of a slump. And he had gone, oh, for 32. And then he put the thong on underneath his uniform on April 29th of 2004 and hit a home run. So it was so.

[Kelly Collette]

He'll believe anything. If I was his teammate, I'd be like, you know what will help you? Giving me $50. You know what I Mean, that'll get you.

[Josh Arnold]

And it's not too greedy.

[Chick McGee]

No.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Don't you think Major League Baseball players are the most superstitious of all the major sports?

[Tom Griswold]

They seem to be so.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Kelly Collette]

They don't change their socks or, you

[Tom Griswold]

know, they put them on a certain road. Pat, you have a tribute to Jeter and the Golden Thong?

[Pat Godwin]

I do indeed. A little volume here. Oh, is that nice?

[Christy Lee]

That's very nice.

[Pat Godwin]

Just a slump busting gold thong Got Jeter out of a losing streak. Oh, you know, it's. It's wrapped around his buttocks, stuck in his crack it's hard for Jeets to take a leak his teammate swears that it works It'll get him out of that rut. Then Jeter hits a home run with that gold thong up his butt. Here we go now.

[Josh Arnold]

Just a slump busting gold thong.

[Pat Godwin]

That filthy thing goes on when the chips are down, you know. Now just a slump busting gold thong. Oh, hold it down and send it to Cooper Town. It's actually Cooper's Town.

[Tom Griswold]

Cooper Town?

[Kelly Collette]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, it's Cooper Town. Thank you very much. Do you recognize the. The origin of that song?

[Kelly Collette]

It sounded like Rhinestone Cowboy just.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Did it.

[Tom Griswold]

You're getting warm. It was sung in English. He nailed it.

[Pat Godwin]

It's a Paul Williams song. Old Fashioned Love Song.

[Kelly Collette]

Did not know that one.

[Pat Godwin]

Back in 1932, whenever I hear a

[Kelly Collette]

song, I always think about what would sound good in a mashup to, like, sing on top of it. So I was like. Like a rhinestone. I almost chimed in. You guys all knew the words. You guys didn't give me the sheet music before.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, we've heard it a few times

[Tom Griswold]

now.

[Chick McGee]

Pat's.

[Josh Arnold]

It's. We've heard it a few times.

[Christy Lee]

We've heard it a lot.

[Chick McGee]

We love it. It's. It's hitbound.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. I do love it, you know, Coming up, we have Christy Lee at the news desk. And give me a teaser. What's going on?

[Christy Lee]

We got the hymn plant app that we never got to yesterday.

[Tom Griswold]

This is amazing.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, we're gonna get to that.

[Tom Griswold]

This is a. This story is truly staggering.

[Josh Arnold]

Him plant.

[Christy Lee]

Him plant. Now that we have another lady here, I want to.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. It is time to weigh in. Very disturbing.

[Kelly Collette]

Oh, good.

[Tom Griswold]

I didn't think it would come to this. In our. In our.

[Josh Arnold]

Is it something any of us were. Would use?

[Tom Griswold]

I hope not.

[Christy Lee]

I hope not. All right, well, you might wait a minute.

[Tom Griswold]

Now that I think about as I look around. Yep. The answer is yep. Right now, I want you to take a look at that credit card bill.

[Chick McGee]

Yikes.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, no.

[Tom Griswold]

You ever say, well, I'll just pay this one off next month?

[Chick McGee]

Well, I'll just pay this one off.

[Tom Griswold]

Then you keep charging stuff and pretty soon you've got this large amount of money you owe the credit card company and then you realize they're charging you more than 20% interest for all that. Well, how about finding out a way to get out of that? That's where American Financing comes in. The the idea here is do something to take advantage of the equity you have in your home and you can wipe out that high interest debt when you do a refinancing average savings, apparently about $800 a month start today, you could delay two mortgage payments also. While you're at it, get the details on how all this works by talking to the mortgage consultants today at American Financing. You'll find them at 866-889-2611. That's 886-889-2611. Or just go to American Financing.net bobandtom that's American Financing.net bobandTom NMLS 182334 nmlsconsumeraccess.org APR for rates in the 5 start at 6.196% for well qualified borrowers. Call 811. For details about credit costs and terms, visit American Financing.net bobandtim hey, thanks for

[Announcer]

listening to the Bob and Tom show this morning. Get a look at today's show on our YouTube channel.

[Tom Griswold]

I wouldn't be surprised.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts studios. Think O'Reilly Auto Parts for all your car care needs. Get the parts and service you need fast from the professional national parts people at O'Reilly Auto Parts. There's Christy Lee.

[Christy Lee]

Hello, Chick.

[Chick McGee]

She is at the news center ready to go. There's. Boy, she sounds ready to go. Tom, did you hear that? Confident.

[Christy Lee]

Ready.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, she means ready to leave.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, there's Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hey, Chick.

[Chick McGee]

There's Josh Arnold. Hi, Ace Cosby. Hello, I'm Chick and hello, Tom. We've got a special guest.

[Tom Griswold]

Our special guest is our second blonde in the room. She is the lovely Kelly Colette.

[Kelly Collette]

Thank you for having me.

[Tom Griswold]

Single, has a possible boyfriend.

[Christy Lee]

Possible.

[Josh Arnold]

She has a boyfriend.

[Christy Lee]

What are you doing?

[Tom Griswold]

She made it very clear that he's about to get dumped. I think that.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, God, you are.

[Tom Griswold]

Didn't she say that? No, I could have sworn she did. Sorry, I misheard. I'm sure he's a lovely guy. Yes, that's right. Your opportunity to defend yourself. Time now to educate one and all by looking into the world of history. All right, let's give you, give you a shot at proven how smart you are.

[Chick McGee]

March 5th.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, this is unfortunate. Oh, this guy's. Wow, this is.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, well, you're just gonna read it to yourselves.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, no, I'm trying to figure out this is the guy, Mr. Ando, who invented instant noodles. You know, so called cup noodles.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, cup of new.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, his. His first name sounds like a Jim Morrison nightmare. It's Mamo Fuku

[Chick McGee]

Ando, Mom.

[Tom Griswold]

Mamo Fuku Ando.

[Christy Lee]

It's his birthday today.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, he died.

[Christy Lee]

He died just a couple years ago, didn't he?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, of a sodium overdose. They spread his ashes.

[Chick McGee]

How did they figure that?

[Tom Griswold]

High school dorm room. I'm sorry, a college dorm room. Storm rooms everywhere. That's really his name. M O M O F U K U Momofuku. But yeah, he invented.

[Chick McGee]

You're the only one.

[Kelly Collette]

I don't think you invent a cup of pudding noodles in a cup.

[Tom Griswold]

No, he did.

[Kelly Collette]

He was like, I'm sad, I'm just gonna use this old coffee mug. And he's like, wait a minute.

[Tom Griswold]

Many a college student. Yeah, I got through school thanks to those. Happy birthday, the great Penn Jillette of Penn and Teller.

[Chick McGee]

He's very tall and.

[Tom Griswold]

Are they done?

[Pat Godwin]

Teller's retiring.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Really?

[Chick McGee]

Teller is a lot older than you think he is.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, 78, I think.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, something like that.

[Christy Lee]

He's the short one, right?

[Tom Griswold]

The quiet one? Yes, on stage. Andy Gibb of the Be. Oh, he was the brother of the Bee Gees.

[Chick McGee]

He would have been, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, he was not in the Bee Gees.

[Tom Griswold]

No, he's a younger brother.

[Josh Arnold]

Gotcha.

[Chick McGee]

Remember that? I think he. I could be getting all this wrong. He shadowed dancing Victoria Principal. He fell in love with her, then she dumped him and down downhill and finally.

[Christy Lee]

Oh my gosh, I forgot. I brought a record when I was in Chicago. The Bobby Sherman greatest dancer.

[Chick McGee]

You go all the way to Chicago? Some of the greatest records. I got to bring it in this country.

[Christy Lee]

And it's like a full like page Bobby Sherman poster. It's awesome.

[Josh Arnold]

You're a big fan.

[Christy Lee]

Yes, big fan. Of course, my daughters had no idea.

[Josh Arnold]

What do we know? Yeah, what would we.

[Pat Godwin]

Easy come, easy go dumb.

[Christy Lee]

He was on Seven Brothers.

[Chick McGee]

Julie, Julie, Julie, do you love me?

[Tom Griswold]

Not a lot. Not a lot of legit hits.

[Christy Lee]

Wait a minute, I thought you guys

[Kelly Collette]

were doing Bohemian Rhapsody. I'm Like I'm not. I'm so lost today.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know Bobby Sherman either.

[Tom Griswold]

Andy Gibb had a huge hit.

[Christy Lee]

Shadow Dancing. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And the women.

[Chick McGee]

I just want to remember everything.

[Tom Griswold]

The women who are into him now do their hair just like him.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, that was the women's gib movement.

[Al Jackson]

Right.

[Christy Lee]

He was handsome.

[Tom Griswold]

Nice tag. That was funny. Actress Eva Mendez. Oh, yeah. Mrs. Now this is a Troy and Gosling.

[Chick McGee]

Gosling's wife.

[Tom Griswold]

Weird. True fact, she was born Eva Mendez. M E N D E Z. Changed it to an S as a stage name.

[Chick McGee]

So you see, at that point, though, she's just. She's just kind of messing with us.

[Tom Griswold]

Right?

[Christy Lee]

What's the point?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, you know, like Willem Dafoe. He made up the thing. Dropping the eye. Okay, I understand that. So I'm sorry. When she was born in 1974, I understand in 40 some years she's going to change her name to eva Mendez and Brazil 66 for. In honor of Sergio.

[Chick McGee]

Let me tell you something. That's one of the finest crafted jokes I've ever heard in my life.

[Josh Arnold]

For how many people? Because if you remember.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, just. Just me and Tom.

[Al Jackson]

Brazil.

[Tom Griswold]

Brazil 66. And Sergio just died a few years ago.

[Josh Arnold]

I. What was Brazil 66?

[Christy Lee]

It was a band.

[Tom Griswold]

He had a huge hit.

[Chick McGee]

Don't limit Sergio. There was 66, there was 77, there was 88.

[Josh Arnold]

He was like the airport movies.

[Al Jackson]

Oh, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Do we have any Sergio Mendez?

[Josh Arnold]

Break out the Victrola.

[Tom Griswold]

He had one. He had one huge hit. Yes, it definitely was.

[Chick McGee]

Dinosaur Victrola.

[Pat Godwin]

What was the hit?

[Christy Lee]

Was it fool on the Hill? Did he do that one?

[Chick McGee]

No. Something. That one. You remember that instrument? Oh, sure,

[Kelly Collette]

I've heard that one.

[Tom Griswold]

Here we go. This is an interesting one. Anybody know who Arthur Spud Melon was?

[Christy Lee]

Arthur Spud Melon.

[Kelly Collette]

Sounds like a little Rascal.

[Chick McGee]

Like a potato.

[Tom Griswold]

1963, co founder of Carnegie Melon of Whammo. He in 63 patented the.

[Chick McGee]

Please tell me he came up with Frisbee, Panda.

[Tom Griswold]

The Hula Hoop.

[Chick McGee]

Wow.

[Josh Arnold]

Tim Robbins invented the hula hoop.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

It's for those who have seen the Hudsucker, bro.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, God. There's a movie I wouldn't see just based on the title.

[Josh Arnold]

It's got its moments. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

You ever see those old movies? They've got the kid with the. The hoop and the stick running down the street.

[Christy Lee]

Sure. Colonial Days.

[Tom Griswold]

That game really lost its.

[Josh Arnold]

Was it just to keep it balanced and moving?

[Tom Griswold]

I guess. Isn't the Hulu essentially that.

[Chick McGee]

Except you use it around your waist

[Josh Arnold]

and you see how long it works your body.

[Chick McGee]

Totally different tools.

[Kelly Collette]

They're like, hahaha, we can't afford food. Let's just run this stick down while

[Chick McGee]

we wait for Sergio Mendez. Let's enjoy Bobby Sherman.

[Christy Lee]

This is it. Easy come, easy go.

[Pat Godwin]

I like it.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Taking shade out of the shade.

[Josh Arnold]

You can understand why I'm laughing. I'm taking a sh. I don't hate it. It's got a Brady Bunch feel.

[Kelly Collette]

TV show credit feel.

[Christy Lee]

Well, he was in Seven Brides for Seven Brothers. He was a. He was a TV star.

[Chick McGee]

He had it all going on there.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, he did all right.

[Chick McGee]

He was a triple.

[Christy Lee]

He sent me. He sent me an exciting 8 by 10.

[Tom Griswold]

He did.

[Christy Lee]

I bet he ended up being an EMT.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

That's how great his career was going, you know.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, let's get back to the inventor of the hula hoop.

[Chick McGee]

Wow.

[Pat Godwin]

I'm taking your blood pressure.

[Tom Griswold]

Not looking good.

[Chick McGee]

Let's start a solution to D5W.

[Pat Godwin]

Some out of that.

[Tom Griswold]

Led Zeppelin performed Stairway to Heaven for the first time live in Belfast on this date in 1970. They finished that rendition three years ago.

[Chick McGee]

Nice.

[Tom Griswold]

Great solo. And Harrison Ford crashed his airplane onto a golf course in California.

[Josh Arnold]

I didn't mean to do that.

[Kelly Collette]

He has a plane.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, I can fly you anywhere you want to go.

[Chick McGee]

I don't guarantee the landing.

[Tom Griswold]

Isn't it. He landed on a golf course, crashed. And isn't it true that he was immediately. It was like a Wednesday, fortunately. And immediately several doctors were on the scene.

[Chick McGee]

I think that. Yeah, it's not a joke there. Yeah, that actually happened.

[Tom Griswold]

That used to be the. The standard joke. But Wednesday afternoon was doctor's golfing day. And that'll do it for our Today in History segment. Coming up, we're gonna hang out with Kelly Collette. We're gonna hang out with Al Jackson and Ali Breen with Sexy Time. These are the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Announcer]

Thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom Show. Sponsored in part by J. The official coffee and refreshments of the Bob and Tom Show.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. There's Christy Lee.

[Christy Lee]

Hi, Chick McGee.

[Chick McGee]

Hi.

[Tom Griswold]

How are you?

[Chick McGee]

I'm good. How's things?

[Christy Lee]

Great.

[Chick McGee]

Got plans for the weekend?

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, son of a gun.

[Christy Lee]

Believe it or not, there's Pat Godwin.

[Josh Arnold]

Hello.

[Chick McGee]

You got. No. There's Josh Arnold.

[Christy Lee]

Hi there.

[Chick McGee]

There's Ace Cosby.

[Josh Arnold]

That's me.

[Chick McGee]

I'm. And here's Tom. Hi, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much. Now we're gonna hook up, I think, with Al Jackson. There we go. Comedian Al Jackson joins us.

[Josh Arnold]

This is ridiculous.

[Tom Griswold]

Is that a.

[Chick McGee]

You look like a. You look like a very tall jockey.

[Tom Griswold]

Is that. Are those silks you got on? A green. Looks like a silk space outfit jacket.

[Al Jackson]

It's a re. It's a reversible Puma jacket.

[Christy Lee]

It.

[Al Jackson]

Welcome back to the early 90s.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Al Jackson]

It's great for guys like me that are trying to. If you want to cut your wardrobe in half, but double it. That's what getting reversible clothing does. I'm in the era. I'm almost to my time era where I. I'm just down to one outfit, like Star Trek.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, what's on the other? If you reverse that thing, what color is it on the inside?

[Al Jackson]

It's just all blue.

[Christy Lee]

Ah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, okay. Because that's kind of a nice green. Getting ready for St. Patrick's Day area.

[Al Jackson]

Yeah. Probably not this year. I do want to say one thing, because there were some jokes made about people's weekend plans. Jokes that I consider a little untoward. I thought we were all friends in here, but honestly, we're in a new era where, like, everybody feels. Feels like this pressure to have their weekend packed. Whatever happened to not have having anything to do on the weekend? Those are the best weekends.

[Tom Griswold]

Absolutely.

[Al Jackson]

Everybody's. I'm going on a hike and my boyfriend's painting, and we're hooking up a sounds. Just don't do anything. See how that works out. I think it'll be fine.

[Christy Lee]

That's what I'm gonna do. I haven't done that in months.

[Tom Griswold]

I do nothing weekend.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

All right.

[Al Jackson]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Sounds like a good idea. I've got to explain that.

[Al Jackson]

Super underrated.

[Tom Griswold]

What that means. Now. We were just talking about some history stuff we mentioned, and I just realized the connection. Connection. We mentioned Sergio Mendez and Brazil. 66.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, we did. And not just 66. 77. 88.

[Tom Griswold]

This was his big hit. You'll recognize this after about 10 seconds in.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Yeah. This is one of his first hits, I think. Right.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Kelly Collette]

Tequila.

[Tom Griswold]

It sounds kind of. But here's where it kicks in with some cool vocals.

[Josh Arnold]

I like this one.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

I could see Jack Lemmon nervously making a drink.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

For a young Shirley MacLaine.

[Tom Griswold]

And what I forgot about was we also had. That was also on this date that Harrison Ford crashed his plane into a golf course and survived, of course. Oh, yeah. I'd forgotten that. Harrison Ford, before he was famous, was a carpenter, and his first major gig was he built a recording studio for Sergio Mendez.

[Christy Lee]

Look at that.

[Tom Griswold]

There you go. That's a coincidence.

[Christy Lee]

Put a bow on that, didn't we?

[Al Jackson]

Was that song called Masque Nada?

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. Very good.

[Chick McGee]

There you go.

[Al Jackson]

That. I listened to that song over and over in college. I. There's. I just thought it was such a cool song. And there's also a remake where this. It's a little bit faster and this. This woman sings it. It's just such. It's such a cool song.

[Tom Griswold]

It's Black Eyed Peas, I think. Well, Black Eyed Peace did a remake of it.

[Al Jackson]

Yeah, they did, but it was just like, kind of like it was a Hispanic one, like a Latin. Latina singer that did it. But, yeah, it's. It's just crazy. Like, those are the kinds of songs felt. Now, listen, I'm a man of a certain age, but I can say that I've had Boots on the Ground. That's one of those songs that, like, when a woman comes to your spot, you know, she likes when there's some music like that that's playing, it's a conversation starter. It's a song that she's not going to associate with any other guy, and she's not going to associate with any other situation. And it's kind. It's funky, it's kind of sexy, and like, while you're making a drink or something, it's like a great song to have playing when somebody you're interested in comes to the crib. So I'm just throwing that out there.

[Tom Griswold]

I think Josh nailed it. I can see Jack Lemmon with, you know, with one of those shakers with a little measuring. Measuring cup.

[Christy Lee]

Ah, the apartment. Just watched that movie the other day.

[Tom Griswold]

I saw that. I. Josh. Now, although I should explain. Our guest. Do you know Kelly Colette? Have you guys met before?

[Kelly Collette]

Hi, Al.

[Al Jackson]

Hey, what's up? Kelly, I feel like you are one of the names that I see when I'm coming to a club where I'm currently there, and I can see the comics that have been there or are coming. I always see your name. So it's great to meet you.

[Kelly Collette]

It's nice to meet you, too. I feel the same way about you. I'm like, I know who Al Jackson is. And then I was like, I don't know if we've ever met before, but I know who you are.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I. It appreciate a question for both of you and Pat, too, and Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

I just received A letter. We were talking about Battle Creek, Michigan, the home of some very fine cereal. We did a whole hunk about breakfast cereal.

[Josh Arnold]

That's Kelloggville, isn't it?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. There is a comedy club there.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Gary Fields ran it, and I was told that when you would play there, he would take you on a tour of the cereal factory and. And they would take your picture.

[Pat Godwin]

I have it.

[Tom Griswold]

And put it on the COVID of a box of cereal. Yeah. And all of the photos when you'd walk in the comedy club were photographs of the comedians instead of the usual.

[Josh Arnold]

That's amazing.

[Pat Godwin]

It's really cool.

[Kelly Collette]

That's so awesome. They only put pictures of me on milk cartons. That's really fun.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you ever experience that, Al?

[Al Jackson]

No. That is so cool. And that's the kind of thing that I miss. And Kelly, you know, being out of the natty, you know that there's, like, some really cool comedy clubs that are not, like, there used to be. I remember the Connect Comedy Connection in Toledo. They had to rebuild. And what they did was, I guess the space they took over was an old bowling alley. So they took the wood from the. The bowling alley floor and they put it on the wall. So it's like a really cool esthetic. And they, like, brought. They kept that vibe of, like, what the place used to be, and it just. It kept from, like, these spaces just becoming, like, sterile corporate comedy work environments. And they just kind of seem like they embodied the city that they. That they represented. So. Shout out. I wish I had done that gig. I would kill. First of all, I was good with the tour. I didn't even need my picture.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

What cereal box would you want to be on?

[Pat Godwin]

Well, actually, I think it was all Frosted Flex, actually.

[Tom Griswold]

No, yeah, yeah, I'm aware of that.

[Josh Arnold]

I would like to have. And it is General Mills, so this wouldn't necessarily rarely happen, but I'd like to have my arm around booberry. We're old pals.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Because we are old pals.

[Al Jackson]

That's good.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, what cereal. What cereal would an Al Jackson be appropriate on the COVID Because I'm.

[Al Jackson]

I'm dressed for it. So I would say Lucky Charms, but that really wasn't my cereal. Lucky Charms is like. I would. It would get. It would give me anxiety because you just get the not good marshmallow, and you're just like, when am I gonna have another marshmallow instrumental bite? I ain't like that. I was really. Even though I was ahead of my time, I was. I was a frosted Shredded Wheat. I love those.

[Josh Arnold]

Really good.

[Al Jackson]

I would eat them without cereal.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, me too.

[Al Jackson]

I would. I would eat them without milk. I would just pop them.

[Tom Griswold]

So you. You'd want to be in the COVID of Frosted Flakes with Tony the Tiger?

[Al Jackson]

No, no.

[Christy Lee]

Like the Shredded Shredded Wheat.

[Chick McGee]

Y. Thanks for listening.

[Christy Lee]

Tom, what are you doing?

[Josh Arnold]

Were you frosted Mini Wheats or the. The shredded.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, that's what you mean. You meant the frosted.

[Al Jackson]

Oh, yeah. Frosted Mini Wheats within the yellow, yellow box. And I would pop them. The only thing is, sometimes you forget that people do take shredded Wheat to, you know, be a little bit more regular. And sometimes you're just like, why does my stomach feel like that? And you realize, maybe you should have not eaten as many. Many wheats. But I. I. No regrets. That was my. That would be my box for sure.

[Tom Griswold]

Josh, have you thought about it? I mean, do you think I would

[Josh Arnold]

put my arm around blueberries?

[Tom Griswold]

But that's it. I mean, what about if you were. That's not a Kellogg's product.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, so you want me to go strictly Kellogg's? I'm kind of trying to figure out what it is you're wanting one of us to say.

[Christy Lee]

I have one.

[Kelly Collette]

I have one. I would want to be on a box of cereal with Captain Crunch, because I love a man with a boat and.

[Tom Griswold]

Very good.

[Kelly Collette]

I very much like the idea they have a certain cereal where they call Oops all berries, which I think is hilarious. It's just like, oops, we messed up,

[Josh Arnold]

and they took the mistake. They owned it, and then they profited.

[Tom Griswold]

Don't they do that periodically? Exactly like they do that all the time.

[Chick McGee]

They did the Marshmallow Giant Frankenstein switch there that switches the blueberries on and off, and it gets knocked into on.

[Tom Griswold]

Is that like. Is it like the McRib? It only comes around occasionally.

[Chick McGee]

Some.

[Josh Arnold]

Some of them Oops all berries may be.

[Chick McGee]

I think you can always get oops all berries now.

[Kelly Collette]

Yeah. But I like the idea that there's like, this is Oops, I ate the whole box. Like, nothing matters. We're all gonna die. You know what I mean? It's like a very. In the.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, now, Al, the point of this aspect, this program, I should explain to Kelly. Al is going to try to teach me something about street lingo. Al, what have you got for me today?

[Al Jackson]

I. I have quite a few, but I have to ask this because this will probably be my only time to ask this on in for the rest of my life. Hopefully. This was a Midwestern, maybe like A regional serial. Did you guys have King Vitamin?

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

We never got it, but I saw it.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Al Jackson]

Okay. It wasn't everywhere, but I was like, did I dream that my dad used to stock up King? It was like this.

[Chick McGee]

And let me tell you something.

[Al Jackson]

Just please let me hear King Vitamin.

[Chick McGee]

It wasn't a cartoon. It was a guy. Yeah, on the box, a King. It was like some. He looked like a. An act. He was an actor.

[Al Jackson]

Yeah, well, I don't know, chick. You're being. Harrison Ford is an actor. This was a drunk man ride out so they can shoot some B roll.

[Tom Griswold]

I think that we're making some assumptions here. I'm sure he's a fine man.

[Christy Lee]

Looks like the guy from Monty Python.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, right. You got it right there, right?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

There you go.

[Al Jackson]

Oh, that makes me feel so much better. I was worried it was just me. All right, Tom, let's get into it. Okay, Tom. Well, let's start off, you know, we want to show our guests in the world that, like, you know, these things. So we're gonna start with an easy one. Tom, tell everybody quickly what a base he is.

[Tom Griswold]

A baddie. Yes.

[Chick McGee]

Bady, bady, baddy.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm a woman of easy virtue. She's. She's a baddie. Round heeled.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, like a bitty is what you're doing? Is that what you're doing?

[Tom Griswold]

It's bad. We're. Oh, bad kind of.

[Al Jackson]

What world would that be? Bad?

[Josh Arnold]

Tom?

[Ali Breen]

Yeah.

[Kelly Collette]

What are you saying?

[Tom Griswold]

I'm. I'm not getting warm, am I?

[Josh Arnold]

No, no, you're kind of. It's a woman.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, she's a baddie. Is this a suggestion to someone not to take her out? That this is not going to go. Well, the opposite.

[Chick McGee]

No. Oh, it's. Oh, it's.

[Tom Griswold]

She's bad. She's. Yes, she's, like I said, a woman of easy virtue.

[Chick McGee]

She kisses with her mouth open.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Al Jackson]

Just means she's hot.

[Chick McGee]

That's right.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

I was. That's a good thing.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, but she's hot and giving.

[Josh Arnold]

No, that's not part of it.

[Tom Griswold]

But then who wants to go out with her? So this is stuck up to. Wants a free dinner. Okay, fine.

[Chick McGee]

She thinks she is.

[Al Jackson]

All right, Tom, that went. That didn't go as well as I thought.

[Chick McGee]

That was horrible.

[Al Jackson]

We were gonna blow through that.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

No help. Okay, next.

[Al Jackson]

All right, Tom, what is. What would you say? That's a body. You would point to somebody and say, that's a body.

[Tom Griswold]

I. I would assume you'd be Admiring. Admiring the curvaceous nature of a young lady. And so that's a body.

[Pat Godwin]

No, probably not.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, that's somebody that makes too much sense.

[Josh Arnold]

That's not a bad guess.

[Tom Griswold]

What do you think it is, Pat?

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, that's somebody. That's somebody important. That's a body.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, that's. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I like that.

[Al Jackson]

That's not correct. But you're in the right house. You're not in the right room, but you're in the right house. I like where you're going, Pat.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

That's a body.

[Al Jackson]

Why would that person be important to you?

[Chick McGee]

A member of an entourage? It really doesn't have any. He's just a body part of your family.

[Al Jackson]

No, no, the exact opposite. This person could be considered maybe a buddy.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, all right.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, is this someone who's the. The close friend of someone who's really famous?

[Al Jackson]

No, it's somebody that you slept with.

[Josh Arnold]

It's a friend with benefits, in a way.

[Al Jackson]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Or that's somebody on my body count.

[Al Jackson]

Yes, that's exactly. I think that's where it came from. Gotcha.

[Christy Lee]

That makes sense.

[Kelly Collette]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

See?

[Al Jackson]

So, Tom, could you use the word, the phrase that's a body in a sentence?

[Chick McGee]

Please, Please do without getting yourself in trouble.

[Josh Arnold]

And I want you to name names.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Pat. So Pat Gon. Walks into a bar.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And Throw me under the bus. Are you.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, no, no, no.

[Tom Griswold]

This is. This is. You're going to be happy with this. And it's Kim Knight at the bar. And all the ladies are named Kim Kim. And Pat walks into the bar and goes, oh, that's a body. That's a body.

[Christy Lee]

That's another body.

[Tom Griswold]

That's another body.

[Pat Godwin]

I've dated and married only Kim El.

[Tom Griswold]

So, yeah, there you go.

[Al Jackson]

I did not know that.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, I. Pat has a. A history of Kim's first name.

[Josh Arnold]

He doesn't have a Korean fetish.

[Pat Godwin]

Yes, I actually do.

[Josh Arnold]

He may, but he doesn't. Yeah.

[Al Jackson]

How many are we talking? Quickly?

[Pat Godwin]

Too many. Jesus.

[Chick McGee]

Three, Right?

[Pat Godwin]

Many ex girlfriends and two wives.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Oh, all right.

[Al Jackson]

That's very weird.

[Josh Arnold]

You should write a book.

[Tom Griswold]

The weird part is he had a tattoo that said Kim, which he covered up and then married another Kim.

[Pat Godwin]

Could have just left the tattoo, Al. Wouldn't that have been odd? When we first got naked, there was a Kim on my shoulder already.

[Christy Lee]

That scared me.

[Kelly Collette]

I would be freaked out. I'd be like, okay, oh, I'm about to be a body in his trunk. That's what I'm about to be.

[Tom Griswold]

Different definition of body, but perfectly valid. Okay, we got time for one more. What is it?

[Al Jackson]

All right, Tom, let's end with one that you're definitely. You've definitely heard from your. Your youngest kids. Tom, what are aura points?

[Christy Lee]

Like your aura frame or.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, aura. I give up. I don't know. Your aura is your. The good vibes that you give out. So. Right. You create.

[Josh Arnold]

Go the.

[Tom Griswold]

With aura. You create an aura. So you get plenty of aura points if you're a great person.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Al Jackson]

You got it right. Even though you begrudgingly did.

[Chick McGee]

So.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, no, I. I wasn't sure.

[Al Jackson]

Yeah, that's exactly what you nailed it.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, that's exactly.

[Al Jackson]

I mean, it could be good or bad, but yeah, the. The good things you do. Oh, those are going to be oral points for. For Tommy. Came in and worked on a Saturday for free. That was a good thing. So. So, like, you could be good or bad.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, it's almost like we set this up, Al, because I'm about to do an announcement for aura frames.

[Christy Lee]

There you go.

[Tom Griswold]

And on the a rotating there is a picture of me and Al Jackson. Just. That'll be coming up in a matter of moments. Thank you.

[Pat Godwin]

Al.

[Tom Griswold]

Are you working this weekend? Are you Just like you said, you're just gonna chill?

[Al Jackson]

Not well, I'm not working this weekend, But I will be at the Creek in the cave comedy club in Austin, Texas, April 10th and 11th. So come out if you are in Texas in a few weeks and come holla at your boy.

[Tom Griswold]

All right, thanks very much. And I mentioned, Ara, the aura points, the aura frame. What? It's my favorite thing. We've been talking about aura. The beautiful aura frame. This one right behind Josh. And what this is all about is a set of rotating photographs or videos. These are so cool. We had a nice letter this morning from someone who took our advice and got one for his lady on Valentine's Day. It's a huge hit and it has unlimited storage and you. You can download it. Download the photographs or videos from wherever you want to be. You don't have to be in the same room room as the frame. I put some of those pictures on from my house and you can do the same. Once again, you preload the photos. Makes a great gift. It's been named number one by wirecutter, the aura frame. And you can save on this, the perfect gift by visiting auraframes.com and to make it even better, for a limited time, Bob and Tom show listeners can knock 35 bucks off their best selling carver matte frame. It's right there. It's that black frame. You'll see the picture pictures rotating on through it. The Carver black frame. The code is Tom. To get $35 off Aura auraframes.com use the promo code Tom. Support our show by mentioning the Bob and Tom show when you check out. Terms and conditions apply. Makes a terrific gift. Coming up, we're going to have three blondes against the rest of them. It's going to be Kelly Collette.

[Kelly Collette]

What a dream.

[Tom Griswold]

Christy Lee and Allie Blake Breen taking on the aura of these men. We'll see how it goes. From the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios, this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Chick McGee]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. There's Christy Lee at the News Center.

[Christy Lee]

Hello, Chick Mag.

[Chick McGee]

Where news comes first. She's on your side.

[Christy Lee]

Not Today News.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

One story, my friends.

[Chick McGee]

Wow.

[Josh Arnold]

One of those kind of mornings.

[Christy Lee]

Yep.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Chick McGee]

There's Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hey, Chick.

[Chick McGee]

There's Josh Arnold.

[Josh Arnold]

Hi there.

[Chick McGee]

Ace Cosby. Hello, I'm Chick Tom. We have a guest.

[Tom Griswold]

We do a comedian. Kelly Collette is here with us.

[Kelly Collette]

Hi.

[Tom Griswold]

She's blonde, just like Christy. Just like our famous visitor, Allie Breen. Back from a ski trip, I hear.

[Ali Breen]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

Where were you skiing?

[Ali Breen]

Just out in Stowe, Vermont, in Mardi Gras Northeast. It was freezing, but it was actually good conditions. It was fun.

[Al Jackson]

Oh, good.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Good, good, good, good. Did you see the video of the young lady who was apparently doing some kind of a stunt and slipped off the chairlift and was dangling there and. Wait a minute.

[Chick McGee]

Did I miss that? Did she plan that?

[Tom Griswold]

Put it up?

[Josh Arnold]

We just don't know because there was

[Tom Griswold]

some speculation that it was planned.

[Josh Arnold]

Her friends are smiling the whole time. They're not worried.

[Tom Griswold]

There was conveniently some video, but it happened somewhere in California. Yeah, but pretty scary. It was. They were, I think, 70ft up or something.

[Christy Lee]

Don't mess around with.

[Ali Breen]

Oh, no. I keep seeing videos of Chelsea Handler skiing naked, though.

[Kelly Collette]

You guys seen those at all that in Instagram today?

[Josh Arnold]

Is that real?

[Kelly Collette]

She looks great.

[Josh Arnold]

It's a real. She really did it.

[Ali Breen]

Yeah, she does it more. I think she's done it for years. Yeah. I think it's like a little tradition she's got going or something. Huh? Y.

[Tom Griswold]

It's got to be free. Freezing.

[Ali Breen]

It's got to be free. I was freezing with all my equipment on.

[Christy Lee]

I mean, I don't.

[Ali Breen]

Yeah, that's. That's commitment to a bit.

[Chick McGee]

Wow.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, good for her.

[Tom Griswold]

That's great. Now we should explain to our guest, Kelly Collette. The way this show works, people send Ali Breen letters at A L, L, I B R E E N. You can find her on your favorite social media platform with Love trouble. Yeah, now you don't have any love trouble right now because.

[Kelly Collette]

Not right now.

[Tom Griswold]

You mentioned that you have a boyfriend in paradise.

[Kelly Collette]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Oh, good. It's going to be okay. Very good. Now, Ally, what do you got?

[Ali Breen]

Dear Allie, I have been dating a guy for two months and we started having sex on our first date. We got close really quickly, and now he has asked me to pee on him.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, God.

[Ali Breen]

I told him I would do it in the shower and he actually loved it. And now we've done it three or four times, so I'm worried. If this is just two months in, how freaky is this gonna get? What do you guys think?

[Josh Arnold]

No, this is his thing, so if you're comfortable with it, cool. If you're not, sorry that he. This is what he requires.

[Christy Lee]

You think?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, this is his thing.

[Christy Lee]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

Just in the shower, though.

[Josh Arnold]

Not necessarily.

[Kelly Collette]

Yeah, she wanted to do in the shower. I would want to do it on the furniture, on the table. In case any other women came over, they would know I was there.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, attractive. Like,

[Ali Breen]

I think it'll become, like, in his mouth or something. It's going to get freakier in that way maybe.

[Chick McGee]

Okay, break it up. Break it up.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, he might want to, like, you know, hold his eyelids open and stuff like that.

[Ali Breen]

Oh, man.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah. That's what. That's. That's what it takes for me.

[Chick McGee]

That's how you can tell this guy. And you can track diabetes that way, too.

[Tom Griswold]

So. So. So the concern is that this is going be to. To. This may be, if you will, part one.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know about that. Just because you're into P doesn't mean you're into. Yeah, it's not the gateway.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know.

[Chick McGee]

Isn't that interesting?

[Ali Breen]

Don't know for sure.

[Chick McGee]

1. One voiding of one, I guess, doesn't cover the whole thing.

[Josh Arnold]

But there's a chance you'd go, well, now, do you want me to do the other thing? What are you disgusting?

[Christy Lee]

No, don't offer that.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah. I don't offer.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, don't offer.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, when she goes away for. If she has to go on vacation, does she have to leave him? Bottle it up for him? Like, she was. Like. She was. Like she was breastfeeding and had to save milk.

[Kelly Collette]

He just goes to the mall and looks at the fountain and misses her.

[Ali Breen]

Oh, my God.

[Tom Griswold]

She leaves jars of it and explains how to get it to body temperature. Put it in the microwave for 12 seconds. Wow. Well, as. As. As Chick McGee has often said, the key word here is specificity.

[Chick McGee]

That's right.

[Christy Lee]

I wonder if that would work. It in a squirt bottle.

[Josh Arnold]

And I imagine he wants it hot off the press.

[Christy Lee]

Just asking.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, because in a squirt bottle, it might be somebody else's.

[Christy Lee]

I mean, does it matter? Throw a little.

[Ali Breen]

Yeah, you throw a little party and give everyone preloaded squirt guns and really make his day.

[Chick McGee]

It's a piss party. Hey, Josh, you coming to the piss party later?

[Josh Arnold]

You know what?

[Tom Griswold]

I hope he's listening.

[Pat Godwin]

I can't.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm piss poor.

[Pat Godwin]

I got no funds to go.

[Tom Griswold]

Could you imagine?

[Josh Arnold]

Very strict no asparagus rule.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Kelly Collette]

The guy, he probably works at like the drug test clinic. Just on the weekends, just to try and meet new ladies.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, I think we've solved this one. So the answer is, hey, this is his thing.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. I think you're stuck with this.

[Chick McGee]

The answer is, I think this feature's over.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, sorry. Let's move forward. What else have we got?

[Ali Breen]

We've given everyone nightmares. Dear Allie, I saw my husband. I saw my friend's husband holding hands with another woman on the street the day other.

[Christy Lee]

Other day.

[Ali Breen]

They did not see me, but I know for sure that it was them. Would you confront them or tell my friend about it? It feels really wrong.

[Tom Griswold]

You know what?

[Josh Arnold]

No. The rule is.

[Tom Griswold]

Shut up.

[Christy Lee]

Shut up. We've had this before.

[Josh Arnold]

But you're already. She's. This person's already decided. You're telling. You're talking.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Why'd you even write us?

[Christy Lee]

You know what I mean?

[Josh Arnold]

This person's already. Horrible person.

[Ali Breen]

You know what you should do if she tells someone else that personal. If she tells enough people, someone else will tell. She'll take some root like.

[Christy Lee]

Like that.

[Tom Griswold]

There's no way it's going to go

[Josh Arnold]

wait to tell the wife.

[Chick McGee]

That's just.

[Kelly Collette]

I would love to mess with the husband first. Like, next time you come over for dinner, you'll hold his hand. You're like, I think this is your thing. Just make him make him feel uncomfortable. Enough.

[Chick McGee]

There's a different kind of monster, right?

[Kelly Collette]

Yeah, exactly.

[Josh Arnold]

Is there any reason for a man to hold hands with another woman that isn't romantically?

[Kelly Collette]

Yeah, she's blind and he's helping her across the street.

[Josh Arnold]

So there you go.

[Kelly Collette]

Maybe that's her.

[Josh Arnold]

Make a good point.

[Kelly Collette]

It's a good maybe.

[Christy Lee]

It's his cousin or his niece or

[Chick McGee]

I made out with my cousin. You know that.

[Christy Lee]

I guess my cousin.

[Tom Griswold]

It was his mom.

[Chick McGee]

Maybe I made out with my mom. Oh, that's not.

[Josh Arnold]

You know what? Yeah. A son holding his older mom's hand.

[Kelly Collette]

Sure.

[Josh Arnold]

Elderly mom. I should.

[Tom Griswold]

But it sounds like she. Once she spotted this, she did her homework. She wanted to get a good look scene. And assuming.

[Kelly Collette]

I mean, holding hands is intimate.

[Josh Arnold]

To make sure it is intimate. You're right.

[Kelly Collette]

Yeah. I'd rather pee on a guy than hold his hands.

[Tom Griswold]

You know what I mean?

[Pat Godwin]

You know, just what you thought.

[Chick McGee]

That's a great point.

[Christy Lee]

You don't have to touch him. Yeah.

[Ali Breen]

Guys are so dumb. If you are going to cheat, hold someone's hand in public. Like do behind closed doors.

[Christy Lee]

Exactly.

[Chick McGee]

I don't.

[Christy Lee]

You know why?

[Tom Griswold]

How hard is that?

[Christy Lee]

You know why? He wants to get caught.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Moved on. Yep.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Kelly Collette]

He wants.

[Ali Breen]

Just excited by the notion that he might get caught.

[Christy Lee]

He wants.

[Kelly Collette]

Maybe his little hands were cold and he.

[Josh Arnold]

I think she wants him to get caught.

[Kelly Collette]

Yeah. She probably was like, why aren't you holding my hand?

[Josh Arnold]

Hold my hand. Jeez, y'. All getting her to shut up is worth a potential divorce.

[Chick McGee]

You don't shut up about holding your hand.

[Tom Griswold]

We've solved another one. Okay. All right.

[Chick McGee]

Success.

[Ali Breen]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Allie, do you like holding hands in public?

[Ali Breen]

You know, it's sweet, but if you're walking holding my hand, or like sitting on a couch holding my hand, I'd rather be scrolling or, like, swinging. It gets annoying. Actually, it's good for. Do I sound really unromantic?

[Josh Arnold]

No, you don't.

[Christy Lee]

You're not a hand holder either.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, no. I can for sure. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

If you're walking into some event, maybe.

[Chick McGee]

I think if that started. I, I, I never done it.

[Christy Lee]

You never been a hand holder?

[Chick McGee]

No.

[Christy Lee]

I knew a girl.

[Chick McGee]

I think if it started, it would be odd, Uncomfortable.

[Josh Arnold]

A friend of mine was.

[Christy Lee]

Hold hands. You want to hold hands with? No.

[Josh Arnold]

And a friend of mine was having trouble because she, her man really liked to hold her hand while she drove.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, that's annoying.

[Chick McGee]

That's a car accident.

[Josh Arnold]

So, you know, she'd be driving with one hand, and, and she hated it because she wanted her secondhand. Bria. She didn't know how to take. Tell him. And finally she said, you know what, honey? Would you please just put your hand on my leg? And that solved the problem.

[Chick McGee]

But she loves him.

[Tom Griswold]

Of course.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

She didn't want to hurt his feelings. He was being sweet.

[Ali Breen]

Well, guys will also walk with Their arm around you walking down the street, which gets really hard. You have to act like you're in a three legged race and coordinated.

[Chick McGee]

Where are you in putting your hand in his back pocket. And him putting his hand in your back pocket.

[Tom Griswold]

Isn't this all about high school?

[Josh Arnold]

Only at Six Flags.

[Christy Lee]

Isn't this all about possession though? Kind of a thing like control and possession.

[Tom Griswold]

I just think it's specificity.

[Kelly Collette]

That's what this guy like maybe it's a safety issue. Like she keeps bumping into poles and you know, knocking the same.

[Tom Griswold]

Is this the blind chick from the last story?

[Al Jackson]

Okay.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Ali Breen]

Really sticking to the story.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Now I'd like to switch gears here. I want Christy. She hasn't had a chance to do much news. Can you do the. The news story that we've been kind of alluding to?

[Christy Lee]

The app?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. I don't know if you've heard about this, Ally. This is really weird.

[Christy Lee]

There's a new app from Him Plant that shows users the potential results of a penis enhancement procedure. So according to the press release, Him Plant POV is an AI powered visualization visualization platform that allows you to upload images of your wean.

[Chick McGee]

Of my what?

[Christy Lee]

And then preview what it would look like as it stimulates and simulates potential growth enhancement. In other words, from hemp Plant.

[Tom Griswold]

In other words, you've seen, for example, you could take a photograph of someone's face and it'll say this is what you're going to look like when you're 85 years old.

[Kelly Collette]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

This is an app that one would take a picture of one's male member and it will show what it would look like after whatever procedure this is to make it larger.

[Christy Lee]

It's actually an FDA cleared cosmetic penile implant procedure. So it would show you what yours would look like if you had this done.

[Josh Arnold]

I think it's kind of fun.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Ali Breen]

Every guy just picture. How hard is it to just picture it a little larger? I know every visual aid.

[Kelly Collette]

Every guy wants to see what it looks like. Black. I think I would do that.

[Josh Arnold]

But I'd also want to see what it looks like blue. If I were.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Is there an app?

[Ali Breen]

Yeah. It doesn't seem that.

[Tom Griswold]

So wait a minute. So if you're sexting on St. Patrick's Day. Yeah. Maybe the little leprechaun there.

[Josh Arnold]

You wouldn't like me when I'm angry kind of thing. Is there an app that'll de age my balls?

[Kelly Collette]

I didn't know this surgery was a thing. Is this a real thing?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Kelly Collette]

People get done.

[Josh Arnold]

You can either get the bacon wrap, which essentially increases girth, or you can get it lengthened as well.

[Chick McGee]

They call it the bacon wrap.

[Josh Arnold]

That's what I call it. Like a bacon wrapped filet.

[Chick McGee]

I think that's gonna catch on.

[Tom Griswold]

But yeah, this is. This is. This is legit.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. The release warns, though, that the AI generated previews are for visualization purposes only and they do not predict the guaranteed surgical outcomes. Like, sure is what it would look,

[Josh Arnold]

but it's kind of like when you want your house painted. You can do it. You have an app. Hey, this color that.

[Christy Lee]

Exactly.

[Tom Griswold]

This is sort of like a glamour shot. Can you see if they. If they put that in the mall?

[Chick McGee]

Yep.

[Christy Lee]

Wrap a little boa around it.

[Tom Griswold]

Sexting glamour shots.

[Chick McGee]

That's wonderful.

[Tom Griswold]

They have, like, athletic scenes. Here I am as a pole bowl.

[Josh Arnold]

I want mine resting on a 96, the year that I graduated, standing on a train track.

[Chick McGee]

You could use like the. The toy G.I. joe. All those accessories, like.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Army helmet.

[Tom Griswold]

What's the name of the app again?

[Christy Lee]

It's called Him Plant App.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Christy Lee]

H I M pla Use this just

[Ali Breen]

to send their pictures.

[Josh Arnold]

Right.

[Chick McGee]

Help. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Here's what it's okay.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, Ally, thank you very much as always. Are you working in the city this weekend? What's going on?

[Ali Breen]

Oh, I'm gonna be in Reno this weekend. I'm gonna be at the Reno Tahoe Comedy club on Saturday night, and then I'm at a casino. I keep forgetting to write the name down to tell you guys. I'm at a casino like a half hour out of Reno on Sunday night. I'll post on my Instagram if anyone to wants. Wants to come.

[Chick McGee]

So there you go. You heard it here first. She's getting married in Reno this weekend.

[Kelly Collette]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Well, Ali, always a great pleasure. Very funny as always. And it's nice to have the three blondes. You guys would be a great team. That'd be a great show. Now. Thanks again, Ellen. Okay, time now too.

[Christy Lee]

How do you guys would use this? Would you.

[Josh Arnold]

No, I would mess around with it.

[Christy Lee]

I think you. I thought you would be.

[Josh Arnold]

Because I. I mean, I'm confident enough with what I. It wouldn't be. I'm not interested in any procedure, but I think it would be fun to kind of mess around.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, sure.

[Kelly Collette]

It'd be fun if they had a video, showed you how you walk different afterwards.

[Josh Arnold]

I like that.

[Kelly Collette]

Yeah. I'm sure it's an adjustment. Right?

[Tom Griswold]

Or they could do it like the old ad at the back of the comic books where the guy gets the sand kicked in his face.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, I don't remember. Sand kicked.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, the Charlie made a man out of Mac.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, the Charles. It was Charles Atlas. And the guy with. The guy with. Was on the beach and a bully kicked sand in his face. And then he took the Charles Atlas weightlifting program.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, okay.

[Chick McGee]

And his girlfriend was like, you're not even a man or something like that.

[Tom Griswold]

This could be done. Done with a nice, nice comic. A comic strip. After him plant Joey attracts all the girls and it shows five lovely ladies around him. Wow. Let me see it.

[Chick McGee]

Joey.

[Kelly Collette]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, I'm sorry.

[Chick McGee]

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[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much. Chick McGee reporting from TheOrangeSouls.com sports desk. We're gonna come back with the lovely Christy Lee and the lovely Kelly Collette. We are in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios and they are very nice and we appreciate your being here with us on the Bob and Tom Show.

[Announcer]

Just gotta get a hold of us. Call, text or email. Get all the contact information you need at bob and tom.com. this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. There's Christy Lee.

[Christy Lee]

Hello, Chick.

[Chick McGee]

Hey. At the news center, there's Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hey, chick.

[Chick McGee]

Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

Arnold. Jster.

[Chick McGee]

There's Ace Cosby. Hello, I'm Chick McGee. Still singing Easy Come, Easy Go by Bobby Sherman in my brain.

[Josh Arnold]

Yep.

[Chick McGee]

Here's Tom. And our special comedian Guest hanging out

[Tom Griswold]

with comedian Kelly Collette.

[Josh Arnold]

Casey, don't be around.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you ever have a nickname when you were growing up?

[Kelly Collette]

Yeah, I had a nickname. It was Corky, and it was my soccer team nickname because there was already a Kelly. And then I started high school, and they did roll call, and they said, is Kelly here? And I raised my hand and I had, like, 15 girls turn around. They're like, your name's Corky. And I'll say, you thought that was my real name.

[Josh Arnold]

Corky.

[Chick McGee]

Corky.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. That's cute, Nick.

[Kelly Collette]

I thought it was cute. Yeah. I had a vanity license plate that said quirky on it when I was 16.

[Chick McGee]

You really embraced it?

[Kelly Collette]

Yeah, really. It was. It was me for a while.

[Tom Griswold]

That would have been a pretty good comedy name.

[Kelly Collette]

I thought so, too, but then I was like, I probably need, like, a prop rubber chicken and, like, a fun hat with a propeller on it.

[Chick McGee]

Speaking of rubber chickens, Tom, these aren't rubber chickens. Guest comedian appearances on the Bob and Tom show, sponsored by Lee's famous recipe chicken. Famous for a reason.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yes.

[Chick McGee]

Yes, sir.

[Josh Arnold]

Good stuff.

[Tom Griswold]

Shouldn't we have a piece of chicken to eat every time we read that?

[Josh Arnold]

I requested that.

[Chick McGee]

I couldn't agree more.

[Tom Griswold]

I think that would be absolutely delightful. Now. Oh, you.

[Chick McGee]

You.

[Tom Griswold]

You were saying you have a dog. I heard you were talking to Christy.

[Kelly Collette]

I have a dog. I adopt senior dogs.

[Tom Griswold]

And what kind of dog is it?

[Kelly Collette]

It's a dachshund.

[Tom Griswold]

And I have a letter.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, from the dachshund.

[Christy Lee]

Where are you, Mommy?

[Kelly Collette]

Dear Mommy, you left me this morning.

[Tom Griswold]

This comes from Double A Erin in Shelby, Ohio. Hey, guys, dachshund instead of dachshund is a pet peeve of mine.

[Chick McGee]

Okay?

[Tom Griswold]

This came up earlier today. No educated person could look at the word dachshund and get dachshund. It's obviously a German word some hillbillies thought they could pronounce. Sorry for my rant. Well, apparently, that's a problem.

[Kelly Collette]

I can't spell it either. That's why I just call them Wiener dogs.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, yeah, we were talking about them because was. There was a wiener dog race on ice as part of a hockey game.

[Chick McGee]

Those are very popular. Yeah, they're breaking out everywhere.

[Tom Griswold]

It was sweet.

[Kelly Collette]

Yeah, it was, it was very cute.

[Christy Lee]

I wanted. Have you done this before? Senior dog adoptions?

[Kelly Collette]

Yes. This is my third.

[Christy Lee]

Really? I really want to start doing that.

[Kelly Collette]

They're on my eating schedule. They're on my sleeping schedule. They just want to hang out with you. They're very chill. They go, you know, you don't have that puppy face.

[Josh Arnold]

I've thought about it, too. But, man, man, I'm the emotions.

[Christy Lee]

I know. I get so attached. And they only last, you know, a couple years.

[Chick McGee]

The next thing for me, oh, they'll be here to pick up the dog. Okay. I barricade myself in my house, man, with some automatic weapons, just trying to get this going.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Chick McGee]

All right, go ahead.

[Josh Arnold]

But it's great work. That's great.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, it is.

[Kelly Collette]

I do it for the attention. I appreciate it.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, let me ask you this. You're a touring comedian.

[Kelly Collette]

I am.

[Tom Griswold]

Do you take your dog with you, and if so, do you take the dog on airplanes?

[Kelly Collette]

I try, I try to take her with me. She's not been on a plane yet because I don't know how she would handle, like, turbulence. Like, I'm really bad at turbulence. Like, I, I always think the worst thing's gonna happen. And I, I, I tried to study planes to try to feel better about what's gonna happen. And I, and I read this study that said more and more female pilots are starting to emerge. Yeah. And I was, I thought that was great that we're getting more women pilots. Like, it's like they found out the one place you can't get sexually harassed is ironically called a cockpit.

[Chick McGee]

Right.

[Kelly Collette]

We were just like, train in this. That'll be good. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. That's very nice. Kelly Collette on tour. Bloomington, Cincinnati, St. Louis, Indy, all on her schedule. We're going to be seeing you again in just a couple weeks.

[Kelly Collette]

So excited for that.

[Tom Griswold]

For the Reds home opener special edition of this show, we'll be at Smoke Justice, Covington, Kentucky, usa, with a couple of treats, some great guests, and a cool poster and a special charity T shirt we're working on right. Right now. Hope to see you there. And thanks for being here with us. The O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios, this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Announcer]

Thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom show this morning. Even though we're not too much to look at, you can also watch the show on our YouTube channel.

[Chick McGee]

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