The BOB & TOM Show - May 20, 2026

Summary

The BOB & TOM Show – May 20, 2026

Podcast: The BOB & TOM Show Free Podcast
Date: May 20, 2026
Main Theme: From outrageous Mr. Obvious sketches to lively roundtable debates about intimacy, beer, cleaning quirks, and pop culture, this episode delivers trademark hilarious banter, personal confessions, nostalgic throwbacks, and off-the-rails riffs from the BOB & TOM team.

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Overview

This episode opens with a classic “Mr. Obvious” bit in a raw “too hot for radio” version, spinning quickly into the usual mix of comedy, casual sports talk, relationship confessions, and irreverent group discussions that fans expect. The morning crew banters about everything from laundry rituals and odd jobs to legal pillow tag placement, car sex, retro pizza places, and the demise of Schlitz beer. The ever-rotating cast—Tom Griswold, Chick McGee, Christy Lee, Bob Kevoian, Pat Godwin, Jess Hooker, and guests—chime in with stories, hot takes, and jokes, creating a roller-coaster of topics and tones.

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Key Segments & Discussion Points

1. Mr. Obvious: “Too Hot for Radio” (00:16 – 04:20)

• A parody of the iconic parody advice host, Mr. Obvious, unfiltered and comically mean-spirited.
  • “It’s because you’re a stupid idiot, that’s why it’s not working.” – Mr. Obvious (02:12)
• Satirical ad for the (fake) “Mr. Obvious Too Hot for Radio” tapes.
• Memorable moment: “You just made the connection, didn’t you, mother—?” (03:00)

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2. Shirt Banter and Cruise Culture (04:21 – 07:36)

• Extended riff on Pat Godwin’s ostentatious “party” shirt; vacation shirts and memorable wardrobe pieces.
• Pat recounts time as a cruise ship musician, cruise romances, and the “fraternization” rules:
  • “On Carnival, you can’t fraternize... on Royal Caribbean, you can do whatever you want.” – Pat (05:26)
  • “Did you ever get lucky on the ships?” – Bob (05:21)
• Casual winking at shipboard love stories, boundaries, and using humor to dodge direct answers.

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3. Pillowcase Debate: Tags & Home Rituals (08:06 – 12:13)

• Listener question prompts heated team debate: Does the pillow tag go inside or outside the case?
  • Consensus: “The tag goes inside—obviously.” (08:09)
  • “If you own it, you can tear it off.” – Christy (12:05)
• Tom adds, “There’s a Swedish superstition: keep the closed end away from the door so evil spirits can’t get in.” (08:34)
• Running jokes about hiring housecleaners, making toilet paper roses, and Woody Allen references.

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4. Cars, Travel, and Old Concerts (12:44 – 17:03)

• Car intimacy confessions & humorous scrutiny: “Ever had relations in an automobile?” (12:44)
• Bob’s “missed” trip to the Playboy Mansion, concert tales, and going to boring events for romance:
  • “I told a girl I was a Cowboys fan. And I knew enough to lie about it.” – Tom (13:27)
  • “Things you do just to get laid…” – Bob (13:55)
• Transition into sports, road woes, and traffic tales.

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5. Listener Letters: Food Fights, Air Fryer Pizza (22:46 – 26:47)

• Fans write in about pets, pizza reheating, Domino’s selling raw dough, and regional pizza debates.
  • “Air fryer pizza is amazing.” – Bob (25:07)
  • “Day-old spaghetti just tastes better. Alton Brown explained—some sort of chemical reaction.” – Tom (25:22)
• Running jokes about city rivalries, traffic, and authentic pizza rituals.

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6. Toothpicks, Accidents, and Pet Peeves (52:24 – 57:02)

• Recap of David Rush’s world record: most toothpicks broken in one minute on a Disney cruise.
  • “He snapped 84 toothpicks—beat the previous record of 58.” (52:56)
  • “Chaos? There are 8 people watching.” – Chick (53:08)
• Toothpick hazards in club sandwiches, the perils of hidden skewers, and the George Peppard “toothpick” story.

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7. Home Cleaning, Quirks & Gendered Division of Labor (99:19 – 102:00)

• Amusing letters and side-riffs on partners’ laundry habits, folding etiquette, unique “aftercare” customs post-car sex.
  • “She folds her own stuff and leaves me to fold mine and the kids’. Should I be concerned?” (144:13)
  • “She’s wearing them for herself—or is she?” — Discussion on mysterious lingerie found in the wash.

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8. Car Intimacy: The Science, Stats, and Survey Results (61:06 – 104:41)

• Christy details a University of South Dakota survey: 1/3 of undergrads engaged in sexual activity in moving vehicles; 9% achieved “full… action.”
• Risks: Taking eyes off the road, drifting into lanes; disparity in pleasure (“2/3 of men, 1/5 of women achieved orgasm”).
• Roundtable humor, tips, and the Men’s Health “9 Tips for Better Car Sex” with escalating derision.
  • “Pack a car sex bag. Don’t leave lube or condoms in your car—it can melt.” (87:04)
  • “Keep some clothes on in case you need a quick exit.” (101:39)
  • Absorbent sex blanket, playlists, and sundress logistics debated with mock seriousness.
  • “Aftercare: Give her a fake name, then get out.” – Tom (103:48)

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9. Beer Nostalgia & Farewell to Schlitz (107:12 – 112:11)

• Schlitz, “the beer that made Milwaukee famous,” is being discontinued after 175 years.
  • “When you’re out of Schlitz, you’re out of beer.” (108:24)
  • Roundtable on old beer ads and slogans; personal anecdotes about stealing Schlitz as a kid.
• Satirical “Clitz” beer commercial sketch lampoons advertising misfires.

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10. Letters & Relationship Advice – Sexy Time with Allie Breen (139:38 – 154:40)

• Allie joins for relationship Q&A:
  • Woman struggles with boyfriend’s over-enthusiasm for back-to-back sex (139:38)
  • Divorced dad’s new date wants to meet his ex-wife to verify their living arrangement (141:15)
  • Suspicion about spouse’s new lingerie (144:13)
  • Issues of trust, cheating, and how long you can hold a grudge about old infidelities (150:10)
• Notable exchange: “Marriage isn’t about love—it’s about how much you’re willing to put up with.” – Chick (154:13)

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11. Pizza Hut Goes Retro (161:04 – 162:36)

• Pizza Hut restoring red cups, checkerboard tablecloths, salad bar, and Tiffany lamps in some franchises.
  • “Now, if they reinstitute ‘read a book, get a personal pan pizza’—that was huge.” – Chick (162:03)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “You just made the connection, didn’t you, mother—?” – Mr. Obvious (03:00)
• “If you own it, you can tear it off.” – Christy, on pillow tags (12:05)
• “Lots of food, lots of sex.” – Pat Godwin on cruise ship life (07:34)
• “The tag in the pillow goes in first.” – Consensus (09:49)
• “I told a girl I was a Cowboys fan… I knew just enough to lie about it.” – Tom (13:27)
• “Marriage isn’t about love—it’s about how much you’re willing to put up with.” – Chick (154:13)
• “Did she have ‘see-through underwear’ for herself, or for someone else?” – Christy (144:53)
• “Pizza Hut is bringing back the red plastic cups!” – Christy (161:14)
• “You don’t know Schlitz from Shinola.” – Bob (130:55)
• “After cleaning up, you can even go for a drive while you talk about what you liked…” – Christy (103:52)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

| Timestamp | Segment | |------------|-----------------------------------------------------| | 00:16 | Mr. Obvious Too Hot for Radio Sketch | | 04:21 | Shirt Banter / Cruise Ships / Fraternization | | 08:06 | Pillow Tag Debate | | 12:44 | Relations in Cars & Concert Stories | | 22:46 | Listener Letters – Cat Boxes, Pizza Reheating | | 52:24 | World Record: Toothpicks Broken | | 61:06 | Car Sex Survey Stats / Tips for Better Car Sex | | 107:12 | Schlitz Beer Discontinued – Beer Nostalgia | | 139:38 | Allie Breen – Relationship Letters | | 161:04 | Pizza Hut Retro Restaurant News |

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Tone & Language

The episode maintains its signature irreverent, self-deprecating, and spontaneous humor with frequent callbacks, running gags, and playful jibes among the cast. While the group often dips into intentionally inappropriate or silly territory, they manage to ground their off-color jokes with relatable stories and authentic chemistry.

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For Listeners

This episode is a representative Bob & Tom ride: rapid-fire, loaded with digressions, and punctuated with sincere laugh-out-loud moments. You’ll leave with a strong stance on pillowcase tags, an unexpected nostalgia for Schlitz, a new (tongue-in-cheek) blueprint for car romance, and several more reasons to never take yourself too seriously.

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More Highlights

• Recurrent promotion for the Simplisafe system and American Financing (skipped here as per instructions).
• Teases about upcoming Indy 500 special.
• Running in-jokes about Tom’s alien-like habits and product obsessions.
• End-of-show: Reflections on retro culture, classic movies, and silly speculation about band names, breweries, and “alien on earth” skits.

If you missed the show, this summary delivers all the reveals, riffs, and ridiculousness you’d expect—minus the commercials.

Transcript

[Tom Griswold]

It's the bob and tom show. You love his plain speaking, straight shooting, no nonsense approach to solving callers problems. You tune in to his nationally syndicated talk show every day to hear the wise insight and savvy advice he gives to his callers. You see caller, what you got there is a can opener. You use it to open cans. A can opener? I never made the connection. Thanks Mr. Obvious, you're a lifesaver. That's what I'm here for, caller. He's Mr. Obvious, America's favorite answer man. There's not a situation that he can't handle with his sage like wisdom and his quick draw wit. Well, waste not, not caller. And now, Bob and Com Productions is proud to present a side of Mr. Obvious you never heard before. Ah, I hit my head. Damn, that's smart. Uhoh, was my mic on? Now you can hear for the first time the Mr. Obvious that the sensors didn't want you to hear. It's Mr. Obvious too hot for radio. Mr. Obvious too hot for radio. We can't even play it for you in this commercial, it's just too hot. So Mr. Obvious, I can't figure out why it's not working. Oh, well, I can tell you why it's not working. Oh yeah? Why is that? It's because you're a stupid idiot, that's why it's not working, you dumb cut. John, you can't say that on the air. Look, I'm sorry, but what the. This dip doesn't even know how to operate his toaster. Come on, Bill, don't we have anyone screening these?

[Bob Kevoian]

All right, all right, settle down, John.

[Tom Griswold]

Don't settle down John me. And where the are those pictures I was supposed to see? Sit down on the phone. If I don't get those pictures in here by 2 o', clock, I'm gonna walk off this mother.

[Bob Kevoian]

You hear me, Bill?

[Tom Griswold]

I'm not you. I've got money. You know what that means, Bill? That means I've got enough money that I can say you, Bill. Now give me some decent callers on the phone. These calls are ponderous, man, ponderous.

[Bob Kevoian]

All right, John, we'll take care of it.

[Tom Griswold]

And where's my orange smoothie? Damn it, I asked for a cam. Orange smoothie like 20 minutes ago, Mr. Obvious. Raw, uncut, uncensored. So you see my point, caller? No, No I don't, Mr. Obvious. That's got to be the stupidest thing I've ever heard. I'm sorry, wait a minute, what did you say, you piece of.

[Bob Kevoian]

You heard me.

[Tom Griswold]

Look We've got caller id. I'm gonna have a couple of my gorillas down there getting medieval on your ass. How do you like that, Mr. Tuffy, huh? I'll make you think stupidest thing you ever heard. I'll be watching from my yacht while the cops are fishing your bloated carcass out of the river next week, pal. Hey, hey, look, take it easy, Mr. Obvious. I was just kidding. Oh, yeah? Just kidding, huh? Sounds like you just made the connection, right? You just made the connection, didn't you, mother, huh? To order Mr. Obvious, too hot for radio call? 1, 800, eat. That's 1, 800, eat. And so, Mr. Obvious, that was the last time I ever saw her alive. Aw, I'm sorry, caller. You've obviously mistaken me for someone who gives a. Don't be a moron. Order your tapes today. Holy. It's just too hot. Hello. Hi. Greetings and salutations from the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Is the Bobbitt Tom Show Christy Lee at the news desk. Hello, Pat Godwin.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, Chick.

[Tom Griswold]

We'll get back to your shirt in a moment, Pat.

[Pat Godwin]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

There's Josh Arnold.

[Chick McGee]

Hi.

[Tom Griswold]

There's Ace Cosby. Hello, I'm Chick McGee. Hello. Tom, have you noticed Pat Godwin's shirt today? Love it, love it, love it, love it. You used to wear stuff like this, though. I don't know what happened.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, I've got a couple like that. That's nice.

[Tom Griswold]

You had to find one. You had the. The salmon fit the fish shirt forever.

[Chick McGee]

You wore.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

I don't know where that is. I love that shirt.

[Tom Griswold]

I love that.

[Christy Lee]

That is a vacation shirt.

[Bob Kevoian]

Describe that, Christy. Kind of a Hawaiian feel, but more of a print.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, it's printed with cocktails on it.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

I lost my job, my wife, my kids. I'm giving you one more chance. Cocktails.

[Christy Lee]

That screams party buddy.

[Pat Godwin]

It's cool, isn't it?

[Chick McGee]

It is cool.

[Christy Lee]

It's got a little party umbrellas. You know, the little ullas you put.

[Bob Kevoian]

You're going to be the guy on the. On the ship playing a little bit of piano.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, I wore this on the ship?

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

That's a great ship. Church now.

[Pat Godwin]

Sure.

[Bob Kevoian]

Did you ever get lucky on the ships? Did you ever.

[Tom Griswold]

I was just going to say, isn't it. They had rule about fraternization.

[Pat Godwin]

On Carnival, you can't fraternize because you're in the crew area. But on Royal Caribbean, you're a guest. You can do whatever you want.

[Bob Kevoian]

I have a question. Does the.

[Pat Godwin]

You Saw I got away from that.

[Bob Kevoian]

Does the word fraternize?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, it's got the fat, but it's fraternized.

[Bob Kevoian]

Wouldn't that mean only with other men?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, because frat's in it. I don't think so. I don't think that's a gender in that case.

[Bob Kevoian]

Just curious, I guess.

[Christy Lee]

Womanized.

[Pat Godwin]

That's the term they used, actually. In other words, don't talk.

[Tom Griswold]

So sororitization, Is that what you want?

[Bob Kevoian]

Penetration is what I want. Pat, any penetration on board the.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't think he's a gentleman.

[Bob Kevoian]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

As you would say, he's not going to share.

[Bob Kevoian]

I have been actually deleting the word penetration from several stories this morning.

[Chick McGee]

Really?

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, we have.

[Tom Griswold]

Why would you do that?

[Bob Kevoian]

Contextually, it was inappropriate. We have a story. We have a story about intimate relations in automobiles or Pat likes it. You know, a survey and B, a guide from Men's Health magazine about the best ways to have.

[Tom Griswold]

Like, what was that? Photos? Guide for voters.

[Bob Kevoian]

Guide for Europe. That thing?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, there was.

[Bob Kevoian]

There was Fielding's guide to Europe and I think photos did Guys for the whole world.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

But no, this is a. This is a how to. It's unintentionally hilarious. A guide to how to have a sex. A little canoodling in an automobile.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh. Oh.

[Bob Kevoian]

But I want to get back to the ship thing. Pat, you spent many years on the ships entertaining and I know you play the big rooms. You're one of the big draws.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

It was fun and. But so did you ever, you know, meet and do a little more than a meet and greet?

[Pat Godwin]

To be honest with you, I was pretty miserable at the time because I was going through a divorce, so I wasn't real into hanging out afterwards. Did I hang out? Yeah, I may have. Did I date, perhaps?

[Christy Lee]

Date on a ship? That's.

[Tom Griswold]

Give him the. Give him the. What is. What is. Is Tell him that. Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

I mean, people, it's a non stop party. These people are in the mood for anything after a while. They see a good show, hang out. It's non stop party.

[Bob Kevoian]

I see crazy.

[Pat Godwin]

Lots of food, lots of sex.

[Bob Kevoian]

Oh, that's where we were going. Okay, well, we'll. We'll certainly move on from there. We opened up with Mr. Obvious and actually I have a question, a letter here asking a question directed to Mr. Obvious. Since she's not here, maybe we can. He's not here. Maybe we can answer this. And I don't get it. This comes to us from South Carolina. Chad writes settle a Long running feud at my house. You're putting clean pillowcases on. Does the tag on the end of the pillow go inside where you can't see it?

[Chick McGee]

Yes, absolutely. It goes in the closed end of the pillowcase.

[Bob Kevoian]

Exactly.

[Tom Griswold]

A standard procedure. And don't tear it off because the police can't come and take you to jail.

[Bob Kevoian]

I mean, isn't that obvious?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, right. In this case, the other person thinks the tag should be on the open side of the pillowcase. Why? I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know why that would be even a consideration to leave it hanging out.

[Chick McGee]

Same.

[Christy Lee]

And when you put the pillow on the bed, do you put the open end toward the end of the mattress or do you put both ends in?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, here's the thing. You know what I mean? There's like a Swedish thing, I think, about that. Or superstition. You keep the closed end of all your pillows and your towels away from the door so evil spirits can't get in.

[Jessica Alman]

Really?

[Bob Kevoian]

I didn't need to start thinking about that.

[Christy Lee]

Me either. Because I've always done it the opposite. Like the open end would be on the out.

[Tom Griswold]

That explains all your troubles.

[Christy Lee]

That does. I will change that up immediately.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you so much. You'll pick right up.

[Chick McGee]

There are some people who can fold a pillowcase while. When it's on the pillow in a way where it's almost like both have closed ends.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, my.

[Chick McGee]

I'm always trying to figure. I've done it a couple times, like on accident. I can't totally figure it out.

[Bob Kevoian]

That person probably fairly uptight, I'm guessing.

[Chick McGee]

It's nice. It's nice.

[Christy Lee]

It is nice. Well, no, the lady that cleans my home. That sounds horrible. But she used to work in the hotel industry and I guess that was a standard procedure for them.

[Chick McGee]

Doesn't sound horrible. You deserve nice things, cleaning.

[Bob Kevoian]

How about this?

[Tom Griswold]

Is she. Is she stealing yet?

[Christy Lee]

No. God, I love her family.

[Tom Griswold]

No, eventually.

[Christy Lee]

No, they don't.

[Bob Kevoian]

That's from a Woody Allen movie. Do you. Do you take the.

[Tom Griswold]

There we go.

[Bob Kevoian]

The ends of the toilet paper and make it into a nice triangle?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, no, but that's always a nice touch, too.

[Christy Lee]

You know what she does at our house? She makes little roses at the end.

[Jeff Oskay]

What?

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

Wow. That seems like too much.

[Christy Lee]

She makes a flower.

[Tom Griswold]

Seems like a cry for help, doesn't it?

[Bob Kevoian]

Does it make you feel guilty cramming it into a wad and shoving it in your eyes?

[Tom Griswold]

I see. This woman has no existence for being alive other than the people she's she's cleaning for. She has no family.

[Christy Lee]

Married children. Put them through college. She's a great gal.

[Bob Kevoian]

Excellent.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Sounds lost and alone.

[Pat Godwin]

Her own home's a mess. Isn't that ironic?

[Tom Griswold]

No.

[Chick McGee]

Filthy bird. That kind of sounds. I mean, you're. You. You can kind of choose your own hours in a way.

[Christy Lee]

Your families you want to work for.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, you can listen to music.

[Bob Kevoian]

You.

[Tom Griswold]

It's.

[Chick McGee]

You're nobody.

[Tom Griswold]

I bet you there are more people who clean houses with filthy homes than not. I can't imagine going home and wanting

[Christy Lee]

to clean your own house.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Clean the house all damn day. I know.

[Bob Kevoian]

The painter's house always needs painting.

[Tom Griswold]

And the doctor's kids are always sick. Oh, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

I went to this lady's daughter's wedding. I mean, we're. She's family to me.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I wonder what the will. I wonder what Cleaning Way just says about Christie. She horrible woman. She yelled at me.

[Chick McGee]

She beat me or hit me when me.

[Bob Kevoian]

What is recruiting everywhere?

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know.

[Bob Kevoian]

Her underwear makes me sick.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm constantly flinching. Looks like I hate her. I hate that woman.

[Pat Godwin]

Looks like Jackson Pollock putting too much combo sheets.

[Tom Griswold]

So perhaps we got a little character.

[Chick McGee]

Diablo Blanco.

[Christy Lee]

Now you're a little closer.

[Bob Kevoian]

Diablo Blanco. I think we've established.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Bob Kevoian]

It's going to be a good show.

[Tom Griswold]

What is Spanish for White Death?

[Bob Kevoian]

I think that's pretty much it.

[Tom Griswold]

I think I'm close.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, boy.

[Tom Griswold]

Christy is White Death.

[Bob Kevoian]

Let's see where this all started.

[Chick McGee]

With a question.

[Christy Lee]

I see her tomorrow.

[Bob Kevoian]

Tomorrow. So the answer, Chad, in South Carolina is yes. The tag in the pillow goes in first.

[Christy Lee]

You cut the tag off, Chick.

[Bob Kevoian]

Told you it's felony.

[Christy Lee]

I don't care.

[Tom Griswold]

It says it right on the tag.

[Christy Lee]

Take me to jail.

[Chick McGee]

The fine print actually says if you

[Christy Lee]

own it, if you own it, you

[Chick McGee]

can tear it off.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Really? Son of a bitch. Didn't think you read that far.

[Bob Kevoian]

You've read. You've read the whole thing, and yet you've never gotten to the end of a porno. It's amazing.

[Ali Breen]

Amazing.

[Bob Kevoian]

Well.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, Always the dig. Oh, we had a nice little time going there.

[Chick McGee]

Not a fun hang.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, no. Just crash right into the wall, you know?

[Bob Kevoian]

I know. I know. Christie's gal, because I lead the meetings of White.

[Tom Griswold]

Diablo

[Bob Kevoian]

Blanco.

[Chick McGee]

Diablo.

[Bob Kevoian]

Let's see now. Where was I? Oh, I know. Coming up, we have. Yeah, we have two different things about intimate relations and automobiles and trucks. And then we. Of course.

[Tom Griswold]

Have you ever had relations in a automobile or a pickup truck? Anytime, motor vehicle.

[Bob Kevoian]

I Was. No, it's funny, because I was thinking,

[Tom Griswold]

I know you did something on the hood of one in a garage. That's a famous story.

[Bob Kevoian]

But, no, I was trying to think because we had a huge argument the other day about my new favorite song called 20 Cigarettes by Morgan Wallace.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm sure he's fine. I don't care for that song. And I've tried to like him. I really have.

[Bob Kevoian]

I love that song. And it. But. And it does involve intimate activity in the back of a pickup drug.

[Christy Lee]

Do you love that song? Because she loves that song. Be honest.

[Chick McGee]

Which is a totally acceptable thing.

[Bob Kevoian]

No, that isn't even one she likes.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Bob Kevoian]

I. I was taken to that Morgan Wallen concert knowing nothing about him. And then I spent the next two days listening to his music, and I. This is. That's my favorite song. But the.

[Tom Griswold]

I told a girl one time that I was a cowboy fan.

[Chick McGee]

No.

[Christy Lee]

No way. You really wanted that, man.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah. And I knew enough about him so I could lie about it.

[Bob Kevoian]

You better go. You better go to a meeting with Pat.

[Chick McGee]

Was it Sophia, Fair go?

[Tom Griswold]

It was. It was a. It was a little bit of okay, I'll tell you that.

[Christy Lee]

So she was worth it.

[Bob Kevoian]

That's a whole new topic, right?

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. At last we're here.

[Bob Kevoian]

Going to things I once.

[Christy Lee]

Doing things you don't want to do just to get laid.

[Bob Kevoian]

I once went to see the Lipizhonr Stallions.

[Christy Lee]

I've heard that's really cool.

[Chick McGee]

Well, it was kind of interesting.

[Tom Griswold]

Of course, you're a woman. You would say that.

[Bob Kevoian]

But I believe. I think it was the. The choice of going to see Rolling Stones that Nights at Madison Square Garden. I'm not sure which one I chose.

[Tom Griswold]

Don't you think Troy Aikman's the best quarterback? You're damn right I do.

[Bob Kevoian]

I got a true story. This is a real quick true story. I'll tell you the short version. We're driving. This is in Los Angeles. We're driving her mother's beautiful Cadillac convertible. We've just left a Grateful Dead concert.

[Christy Lee]

Mm.

[Bob Kevoian]

We're driving back, and she says to me, well, I'm really glad we went to this instead of accepting that invitation to go to Hugh Hefner's house. I went, what?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, my goodness. Really?

[Bob Kevoian]

Her mother was incredibly well connected. We had been invited to the Playboy Mansion.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't think we could be around you if you had actually visited the mansion.

[Bob Kevoian]

I don't think. I don't think I would have left. Hanging out with Jim, hanging out with Jimmy. Khan.

[Tom Griswold]

Jimmy Khan's in the grotto.

[Bob Kevoian]

Are you. You kidding?

[Tom Griswold]

Absolutely.

[Bob Kevoian]

That's every word of that.

[Tom Griswold]

I understand the grotto was filthy though, that pool.

[Chick McGee]

That's.

[Bob Kevoian]

I've heard that. I had heard that.

[Chick McGee]

You don't even slow down to kick her out of the car, do you? After she says that.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you see a dog on the side of the road? No. Lean out farther.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Like leaving the Universal Amphitheater in Los Angeles in a Cadillac convertible after seeing the Grateful Dead. Wow. Those were the days. Yeah, but that's a whole new topic. Things you've done. When you said you were a cowboy fan, that.

[Christy Lee]

That was shocking.

[Bob Kevoian]

The little guy on your shoulder.

[Tom Griswold]

Go do it, Chick. No, he wasn't on my shoulder.

[Bob Kevoian]

Look what time it is. What's going on over there?

[Tom Griswold]

I'll tell you about Simplisafe, my home security system. It should be yours too, because I have peace of mind. And we use it here at the bottom. Tom Studios easily customize the Simplisafe system. That's right. For your [e-mail] and we've got a deal for you. Hang on. App guided setup and no drilling required. With Simplisafe, you can install and arm your system in under an hour. I did it in about 30 minutes. No need to wait around for that mysterious technician and that two hour window. It's not just a camera with Simplisafe, it's a comprehensive ecosystem of sensors, cameras inside. Now 247 professional monitoring and a break in a fire or flood. Simplisafe's agents are ready to take action. No lock inside or long term contracts either. With Simplisafe, they don't trap you in a contract. Their business is keeping you safe. 24 7. Monitoring for a fraction of what the traditional brands charge. And Newsweek says Simplisafe is America's best customer service. And here's the deal for you. Just go to Simplisafetom.com and you get 50% off your new system. Just by going to Simplisafetom.Com 50% off and peace of mind. There's no safe like simply safe.

[Bob Kevoian]

Thank you very much, Chick Magee. Yes, sir. Coming up, the aforementioned probe into intimate activities and automobiles. We have a interesting Pizza Hut update. After yesterday we had Pizza Hut news, we have more today. We also have a bizarre story involving the so called cyber truck.

[Christy Lee]

And man, those flip me out. I see them every day and I

[Tom Griswold]

don't care for the look.

[Christy Lee]

Me either. I'm sure they're scary to me.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, they scare me.

[Bob Kevoian]

They're like, they're weird looking.

[Tom Griswold]

It looks like that girl, that woman miniseries V with the aliens. That looks like something she dropped.

[Chick McGee]

It does, yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

And coming up, in the world of beer, a sad end in the world of beer.

[Tom Griswold]

I saw that and couldn't believe it.

[Bob Kevoian]

And we'll of course have a couple of beer tributes in honor of the end of this famous beer. And of course, where would we be without a world record from David Rush? You wouldn't be here in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom show. You've got weight loss goals, but hitting them is another story. That's why weight loss by HIMSS now offers access to the FDA approved WeGovy pill and the FDA approved WeGovy pen. With WeGovia, hims lose up to 20% or more of your body weight when combined with diet and exercise. It helps you regulate your appetite and eat less. So success is within reach. Plus, WeGovy is the first ever GLP1 pill for weight loss, so there are no needles needed. And it doesn't stop there. HIMSS makes hitting your goals seamless by offering access to 247 messaging with your care team and in app lifestyle and nutrition support like recipes, meal plans, fitness videos, sleep content and more. It's nice, simple and convenient, just the way I like it. Ready to reach your goals? Visit himss.com bobandtom to get a personalized affordable plan that gets you. That's H I M S.com bobandtom himss.com Bobandom Weight loss by HIMS is not available in all 50 states. WeGovy is the registered trademark of Novo Nordisk as to get started and learn more including important safety information, WeGovy clinical study information and restrictions, visit hims.com sorry,

[Tom Griswold]

I had no part in that. Hello. Welcome back.

[Bob Kevoian]

And yet I blame you.

[Tom Griswold]

To the Bob Tom Show. I. I understand that we're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Chrissy Lee at the news desk.

[Christy Lee]

Hi.

[Tom Griswold]

Pat Godwin at the music desk.

[Chick McGee]

Hello.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello. There's Josh Arnold.

[Chick McGee]

Hi. And thank you for the recommendation, guys. For an Officer and a Gentleman. A damn fine movie. Oh, yeah, a great movie.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, I'm gonna ruin it for you.

[Chick McGee]

You.

[Tom Griswold]

There's Ace Cosby. Hello, I'm Chick McGee. And you know Deborah Winger hated Richard Gere during the filming.

[Chick McGee]

I read that.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. And all that. That honest, that's. She looks like she's all steamy and ready to go and looking at me. It's hatred.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, she Was also very, very unhappy that she had to get naked. Yeah. And so because that scene, there's. There are some moments in that scene that are as intimate and real as. I mean, so they nailed it.

[Tom Griswold]

Right.

[Chick McGee]

But good movie. Did you also know the producer of that did not want Up Where We Belong in that movie?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, really?

[Chick McGee]

He goes, that song is not a hit. It sucks. I want to use on the Wings of Love. I want to use that. And they. And the. Thankfully, somebody talked him out of it.

[Tom Griswold]

Bill Medley and Jennifer maybe. Yeah. Jennifer Warren.

[Bob Kevoian]

Great tone.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, whatever you say. Mayonnaise. Blue Gossip.

[Bob Kevoian]

I haven't seen that in quite a while. What is it?

[Tom Griswold]

Mayonnaise again. His last name. Mayo.

[Bob Kevoian]

Revisit the movie.

[Christy Lee]

Guy in a uniform, though.

[Bob Kevoian]

We've established. We've established the fact that you. You have to. When you get your pillows to settle the argument, the tag goes inside the pillowcase when you slip it in.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, of course.

[Bob Kevoian]

And I just, I wanted to double check. It is legal to cut those tags off.

[Tom Griswold]

But see, this is like my wizard vase thing. Of course it's legal. It's okay.

[Bob Kevoian]

But there's.

[Tom Griswold]

But it says it that you shouldn't. And that's.

[Bob Kevoian]

There's a codicil.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Bob Kevoian]

It will void the warranty on most pillows.

[Christy Lee]

Have you ever claimed a warranty on a pillow?

[Bob Kevoian]

Have you ever seen the line at the Pillow Festival Factory?

[Tom Griswold]

People that are complaining about people ringing their hands. Do they make pillows?

[Bob Kevoian]

That's what it says here. Okay, now it's time to get to our letters. A couple quick reminders. The Bob and Tom Pop up shop is up and running. @bobandtom.com We've got some pretty cool new stuff.

[Tom Griswold]

Is this irritating?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, I love it. I think everybody loves it.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you.

[Bob Kevoian]

I hate it. I'm renaming the store now.

[Chick McGee]

You know what? I promise you that's gonna happen.

[Tom Griswold]

Bob and Tom Lightning Store.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Bob Kevoian]

But yeah, it's there. There's some cool stuff. New things. And a cool tribute. Tribute thing to the forthcoming 110th running of the Indy 500. By the way, our special edition of that show will be broadcast online.

[Tom Griswold]

I've seen every race.

[Bob Kevoian]

If you'd like to listen that morning, go to our website and click over. It'll explain how to listen, which is kind of fun. We'll be doing some stuff with a whole. There'll be people everywhere. That's all I can tell you. Hundreds of thousands of them.

[Chick McGee]

Right?

[Bob Kevoian]

And you could be part of it. Now let's see. Where were we? Oh, it's A letters time. Do you have any letters over there?

[Tom Griswold]

By the time show my dog is a liar.

[Christy Lee]

What do you mean, a liar?

[Tom Griswold]

This is from Del Mar. I asked her if she had been in the utility room in the cat box. I took a picture of her and she denied it. But here's the evidence, as you can see. Have you been in the cat box?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I haven't been in the cat box.

[Tom Griswold]

Not me.

[Bob Kevoian]

Look at their nose.

[Tom Griswold]

All that kitty litter and feet they do. That's like Tootsie. I think that plays into my. I did. I dislike Tootsie Rolls.

[Chick McGee]

I do, too.

[Bob Kevoian]

Because they look like cat turds.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, they almost called them. That might be a great idea to call something like a cat turds. Kids would love that stuff. Gross stuff.

[Bob Kevoian]

You mean like the candy called boogers?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, right.

[Bob Kevoian]

You know something? I don't think that'd go.

[Tom Griswold]

Cat turds.

[Bob Kevoian]

Dingleberries Might like if you had a candy like chocolate covered dingleberries, I think those might sell.

[Chick McGee]

I was in an issue with Goobers because when I grew up, that meant hawker.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, me too.

[Chick McGee]

So I was like, why would they call that Goobers?

[Bob Kevoian]

We had a fake candy in the show called Hawkers.

[Chick McGee]

I was a yogurt.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I remember.

[Chick McGee]

I wrote it. I remember Peggy Fleming was the.

[Bob Kevoian]

Oh, that's right.

[Chick McGee]

Was on the.

[Bob Kevoian]

I don't remember that. Or that movie you were talking about.

[Tom Griswold]

What's green and skates backwards?

[Bob Kevoian]

Certainly a classic.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, what do you have?

[Bob Kevoian]

Oh, I have lots of stuff over here. All right, the. Wait a minute. Sorry. This comes to us from a place I've never heard of. Okay, maybe it's pronounced Ida.

[Chick McGee]

Lou.

[Bob Kevoian]

ID A L, O U I Dalu. Texas.

[Christy Lee]

I never heard of it.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, they forgot all those Texas has the most interesting little town names.

[Bob Kevoian]

I think the special hello to my secret crush, Josh. This is from Jennifer.

[Christy Lee]

Not a secret anymore. Jennifer.

[Bob Kevoian]

Brace yourself, Josh, for the sitcom. It's going to be rough on you because she has three teenagers.

[Tom Griswold]

All right, make room for John,

[Bob Kevoian]

she says. We have a ton of Costco or Sam's Pizza, by the way, they're both better the second day. Recooked in an air fryer.

[Tom Griswold]

So there's the Sam's Pizza at Costco.

[Bob Kevoian]

Or she says. Or we cook a ton of Costco or Sam's Club pizza, I assume.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, okay. All right.

[Christy Lee]

I've never cooked pizza or reheated at an air fryer. Have you?

[Chick McGee]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

It's got to be amazing.

[Christy Lee]

You have. Does it work?

[Bob Kevoian]

I think it sounds interesting. And again, I know there's some kind of scientific study that day. Old spaghetti re cooked with it has had the sauce in it overnight in the fridge.

[Tom Griswold]

Alton Brown explained there's some sort of chemical reaction.

[Bob Kevoian]

Nothing better. Yeah, I love that.

[Christy Lee]

So maybe that also pertains to the pizza since it has tomato sauce on it.

[Bob Kevoian]

Could be. Then Jennifer addresses me in spite of her secret cross on Josh. The first part I can't read just due to modesty. The second part says, Tom, our local Domino's Perenn, this may be regional, will sell you raw pizza dough. For a couple of bucks. You can make your own pizza at night. I was noting that.

[Tom Griswold]

Wait a minute. What?

[Bob Kevoian]

You can buy raw. I was saying yesterday that my girls all the time want to do. Make your own pizza.

[Tom Griswold]

Sure, sure.

[Bob Kevoian]

And you go to the store, by the time you've bought all the ingredients, you could have bought 10 pizzas at the pizza place.

[Tom Griswold]

So they say you can go to Domino's and get all the ingredients.

[Bob Kevoian]

At her Domino's, she said it may be regional. You can just grab. They'll sell you the dough.

[Pat Godwin]

They have a rogue employee in the back cylinder.

[Bob Kevoian]

How you doing? How many, how many you need tonight?

[Chick McGee]

Green pepper.

[Bob Kevoian]

Jennifer, once again from Idaho.

[Tom Griswold]

Nine green peppers. Let's go.

[Chick McGee]

You know they call these capsicum in Australia.

[Tom Griswold]

That's right. They don't know the words green pepper.

[Chick McGee]

You get pre made though, at any grocery store.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, you can, right?

[Chick McGee]

But who knew that Domino's did it?

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, yeah, I. I know you can.

[Chick McGee]

This is the problem.

[Tom Griswold]

That's not the topic at all.

[Bob Kevoian]

But thanks.

[Tom Griswold]

You sell them out.

[Bob Kevoian]

I'm just saying I. I'll do this this weekend. I'll tally up the cost of going and buying.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, it's amazing. But as you say, it's fun for the girls and.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, we do it constantly. And the pizza, well, you can say no. We get the pizza dough from. What's the place called?

[Christy Lee]

Trader Joe's.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yes, Trader Joe's. Very good. Very good pizza.

[Tom Griswold]

If you're out running an errand and you get lost, how do you ask for directions? Because you don't know where you're going or what the name of the place is when you get there.

[Bob Kevoian]

I had a rough day yesterday. I had my second flat.

[Tom Griswold]

What a shot.

[Bob Kevoian]

My second flat tire in a week.

[Ali Breen]

How.

[Christy Lee]

How did you do that?

[Bob Kevoian]

The first one was a giant nail. The second was a giant screw. I believe it's the house being constructed across the street.

[Tom Griswold]

I

[Chick McGee]

mean, just drive on the road and not.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, up into the Construction site. Maybe that would be. That would help.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yes. It's my fault.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, it is the ultimate driving vehicle. But don't.

[Bob Kevoian]

And then I would. There was a massive storm and then I forgot that they've closed the major access road into the city just in time for the major event in the town. I want to find out who's making money rebuilding that road they just rebuilt and hang them publicly.

[Tom Griswold]

Everybody. That's another rich everybody chick. Right.

[Bob Kevoian]

We're back to Jennifer at Idleu, Texas.

[Tom Griswold]

Go, Jen.

[Bob Kevoian]

She goes chick. You are correct to hate Dallas.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you.

[Bob Kevoian]

Nobody that lives in Dallas is from Dallas. That's interesting.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, probably it's one of those. Yeah. Super big, large cities.

[Bob Kevoian]

Like if you go to la, everyone's from somewhere else.

[Tom Griswold]

Exactly. Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Well, now you. You went to Dallas over the weekend.

[Tom Griswold]

I did. Saw the Eagles, Arlington Globe, Life Field.

[Christy Lee]

Nice.

[Bob Kevoian]

So it was a great show. I saw them. Very good at the Sphere. They were terrific.

[Christy Lee]

I saw them in a place.

[Bob Kevoian]

And now.

[Chick McGee]

Earlier.

[Tom Griswold]

Earlier I saw him at a place

[Bob Kevoian]

earlier in the program. You mentioned that you. One time. In order to have a sexual conquest.

[Tom Griswold]

Maybe it was a. I wanted the date to end. Well, I. I didn't. I didn't say anything about you maybe talking about.

[Bob Kevoian]

You may have indicated that you were a fan of the Dallas Cowboys, which you are not.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Yeah. And so the topic is, how have you lied to get laid? Is that. Is that what you're driving at?

[Bob Kevoian]

Well, no, I'm just. It's interesting to me. Did you cover your Redskins and your Washington commander's tattoos when you were entering the.

[Tom Griswold]

It would have had to been before the tattoos.

[Bob Kevoian]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

So before the middle 80s, because I got my first tattoo on the show.

[Bob Kevoian]

So I'll tell you what. I. This is a true story. Bob and I were going to San Francisco for a radio convention and we. We got off the plane and we were walking to get the luggage and Bob disappeared and he came back a few minutes later and he was wearing. This is. I know this sounds ridiculous. He was wearing a San Francisco Giants cap.

[Tom Griswold]

It doesn't sound ridiculous at all.

[Bob Kevoian]

Bob. Bob. As you know, his dad worked for the Dodgers and Bob always wore an LA Dodger cap. Very few exceptions. Almost every picture of Bobby's wearing one. Either a blue one or a black one or a gray one, whatever. And he explained to me that it's dangerous to walk around San Francisco with a Dodger cap. And then we've later found out that in Los Angeles, Remember this thing? A couple years ago, a guy was practically Beaten to death.

[Chick McGee]

Yep.

[Bob Kevoian]

Wearing a San Francisco cap at a Dodger game. So people take it way too serious.

[Christy Lee]

Damn. It's a game, people.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, baseball, sure.

[Chick McGee]

But when you live in a state, you live in a state where crime is legal also.

[Christy Lee]

Ah, yes.

[Chick McGee]

That stuff's gonna.

[Bob Kevoian]

You know that in San Francisco now, Josh, if you shoplift, they'll gift wrap it for you free.

[Chick McGee]

Isn't that nice?

[Bob Kevoian]

And it's really. They really are liberal. That is just after you. Can I help you steal that? Okay.

[Pat Godwin]

They aren't stopping anybody anymore.

[Bob Kevoian]

Well, now it's time for a song, Pat.

[Pat Godwin]

Sure.

[Bob Kevoian]

Okay. What do you got?

[Pat Godwin]

That's what your setup is. Why did I even interject?

[Bob Kevoian]

I'm being generous. I'm giving Pat the.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm on your side, dude. Go ahead.

[Bob Kevoian]

Okay, we'll tell it Pat. We'll come back with a song.

[Chick McGee]

No matter what Pat plays, it won't be the right song. That's. That's where I'm on Pat's side.

[Tom Griswold]

If your song is this song, what is it? No, never mind.

[Chick McGee]

You played that,

[Bob Kevoian]

Pat.

[Tom Griswold]

Reminds me of a old lady in a cashier line. And they've checked all the food out, and she's standing there, and the lady goes, that'll be 111. 19. And the old lady goes, oh, let me get my credit card. I have to pay.

[Chick McGee]

But here's the truth of it. Pat's in line, having already been told to get in line.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

And then he's. He's just sits there for 30 minutes.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

After. Why am I in line? He wonders. And he was also told to have $5 exact change. Then when he gets up there, finally,

[Tom Griswold]

it's not a surprise. What else does he have to do?

[Chick McGee]

Have $9 in nickels.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Chick McGee]

All right.

[Bob Kevoian]

All I said was, what do you want to play? But we don't know.

[Chick McGee]

The conversations that happened.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, that's a whole nother thing.

[Chick McGee]

That's what I'm.

[Tom Griswold]

You know what? They. These two want to kiss anyway. I don't know what they should.

[Pat Godwin]

We've already kissed.

[Chick McGee]

It would be easier on all of us if they just made love.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

Right here in the middle of this thing.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Bob Kevoian]

Well, I'll tell you what, Pat. Why don't we do. Do this, since we've got. We've got pizza in the news again today. Why don't we do one of your pizza songs? What do we do?

[Tom Griswold]

We could do that.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, sure. Okay, good.

[Pat Godwin]

You could have started off like that. We'd be fine. We just wasted three minutes Too many.

[Bob Kevoian]

Too many choices.

[Tom Griswold]

No, we're here together, laughing. We're not wasting time.

[Chick McGee]

Sometimes freedom is a curse, isn't it?

[Christy Lee]

That's right.

[Bob Kevoian]

People like to be told what to do.

[Tom Griswold]

People like it, yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

All right. I'm not going to tell you what to do, but if you are looking to get some cash, this might work for you. Depends on your situation, of course. I filled my car with gas yesterday. $126, thank you very much. It wasn't even empty. Maybe the prices of stuff have got you down right now. Maybe you owe a bunch of money to the credit card companies, whatever it might be. They're charging you, like, 20% interest. Thanks very much. But you may have noticed that your house is probably worth a lot more. So if you own your own home, maybe your neighbor sold his or her house and you went, wow, they got that much for it. You don't have to sell your house to take advantage of its greater value. If you take advantage of the equity in that house by doing a refi, as they call it, refinancing. I am not an accountant, but I do know that some of these numbers sound pretty good to me. This is from American Financing. They're known as America's home for home Loans. American Financing, they have no. No high pressure. Sales dudes or ladies. They're on salary. They just want to help you out. And in about 10 minutes, they can tell you if this might work for you. Depends on your situation, of course. No upfront fees, no pressure. The idea is you do a refi on your house, and that increased value will make it possible to take some cash out. You can use that to pay off your bills or, I don't know, build a new garage. It's all up to you. Right now, they say their average client's saving about 800 bucks on their mortgage payment. And they have a special program going on right now for a limited time that might even delay two mortgage payments for you. So. So obviously, all this depends on your situation. I don't know what it is. Why don't you tell them? They'd be happy to listen to you. American Financing is America's home for home loans. Like I said, you can call them at 866-889-2611, and in about 10 minutes, they can tell you what might work for you. It's a lot easier to remember this. American financing dot net. Do me a quick favor and put Bob and Tom. Be kind enough to tell them that we gave you a little bit of advice. Just check it out. Once again, American Financing.net NMLS 182334 NMLSConsumerAccess.org APR for rates in the fives started 6.327% for well qualified borrowers. Call 866-889-2611. For details about credit costs and terms, visit American Financing.net BobandTom Average savings based on borrowers who save over $200.

[Announcer]

Thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom show this morning. Catch any part of the show you missed? Later Today on our YouTube channel, the

[Bob Kevoian]

United States Soccer Federation presents the U.S. soccer Podcast.

[Tom Griswold]

My name is David Goss and I'm joined by my co host Megan Kleinenberg.

[Christy Lee]

And now we're giving people an inside look at the World Cup.

[Tom Griswold]

Time's ticking. I think you can feel the intensity. All the guys are wanting to really stake their claim and they want to

[Bob Kevoian]

be on that World cup roster. There's no doubt about it. Hosting the World cup on home soil comes with its pressures.

[Tom Griswold]

We're just really excited just as the people are.

[Christy Lee]

The US Soccer podcast presented by Henco.

[Jessica Alman]

Follow and listen on your favorite platform.

[Bob Kevoian]

What's coming up?

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom show in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Thank Go Riley Auto Parts for all your car care needs. Get the parts and service you need fast from the professional parts people at O'Reilly Auto Parts. Christy Lee at the news desk. Hello, There's Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hey, Chick.

[Tom Griswold]

Hi, Pat. There's Josh Arnold.

[Chick McGee]

Hi.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. Ace Cosby, Hello. Hello indeed. I'm Chick. And we're reading emails from our listeners across the country.

[Bob Kevoian]

Before we get to that, around the world and up your alley, little health health update here.

[Tom Griswold]

All right.

[Bob Kevoian]

Did you see this? Is it pronounced Ghirardelli? Chocolate?

[Tom Griswold]

Ghirardelli. Ghirardelli, Ghir Deli. I always heard Ghirardelli. Maybe it is Gardelli.

[Bob Kevoian]

I don't know. I don't know. I heard both. There's a recall.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, really?

[Christy Lee]

I love that.

[Tom Griswold]

So.

[Christy Lee]

No, I love the chocolate. Not that there's a recall.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, there's a whole bunch of products have been recalled.

[Christy Lee]

Why?

[Bob Kevoian]

What makes their hot cocoa mix possible? Salmonella contamination. So yeah, if, if you dark chocolate,

[Christy Lee]

sea salt's not on there. Right.

[Tom Griswold]

Could we trouble you, Tom, to play the fabulous Salmon Ellis man? No. Why? What? What's the problem? What? What? What's the matter?

[Bob Kevoian]

Maybe it is. Yeah, there's a huge list of potential problems with. So if you've got some of that, go online and look up Ghirardelli or Ghirardelli chocolate and make sure that your stuff's okay. And if you get salmonella from that hot chocolate, that's gonna come out pretty much like it came in.

[Tom Griswold]

Is that a, is that a long siege or is that like a 24 hour thing?

[Chick McGee]

That's a good question.

[Bob Kevoian]

Salmonella, I think, is pretty rough. But yeah, sorry about that. And just. Anyway, that was our little health tidbit for today as we turn to read more letters. What have you got over there?

[Tom Griswold]

Let's see. Hello, Bob and Tom show a month ago, after listening to your program and hearing your technique of do you want any of this before I put it away? That's how you tell your significant other. You grab yourself and you look at them and you say, if we want any of this before I put it away. It's kind of a fun way to hopefully engage them in intercourse.

[Christy Lee]

Of course.

[Bob Kevoian]

Or to get a very quick note.

[Tom Griswold]

Anyway, after a shower, I was thinking about this and hearing all the amazing testimonials, I decided to try it myself. I got out of the shower, went to the living room, proudly asked my girlfriend the question, do you want any of this? Before I put it away, all I heard was a burst of laughter, and she said, don't you ever ask me that again. I was gonna write and say, it doesn't work, but to my surprise, Mother's Day weekend, after a shower and driving to my hometown, my girlfriend said she was gonna ask if she could have some of that before I put it away. Okay. Hey, is this considered a success or do the goods have to be given for a success? I think it's a success.

[Chick McGee]

I think so, too. It was the wrong time. Yes, but a success overall.

[Tom Griswold]

That's Michael in Wichita, Kansas.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah. You got to read the room.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, right.

[Bob Kevoian]

The living room. Probably not the place.

[Christy Lee]

What?

[Chick McGee]

And she was in the middle of book club.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, that's true.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Do it in the living room.

[Bob Kevoian]

I had a nice little tag I'm

[Tom Griswold]

not going to throw in there, I would imagine. Yeah. He's masked. In the bed with Tom. That's. There are no off site.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, no. Off sites. No. Got to be in the bed. Right, Tommy?

[Chick McGee]

I think Tom likes a little off.

[Bob Kevoian]

Coming up, we have.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Bob Kevoian]

Coming up, we have a. Both a survey and a set of tips on vehicular intimacy.

[Chick McGee]

Nice set of tips.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

First time I saw something, I guess

[Christy Lee]

you could sneak out to the garage.

[Bob Kevoian]

Good.

[Christy Lee]

New.

[Tom Griswold]

That's why I like the car so much.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Love it.

[Bob Kevoian]

Oh, yeah. Oh, I, I, this is your suggestion. If you Want to?

[Christy Lee]

Yes. If you're trying to sneak and find a place, you could sneak out into the garage.

[Bob Kevoian]

I suppose. I mean, if you had lived in a small building.

[Tom Griswold]

But what.

[Bob Kevoian]

Typically, I hope you have enough space in the house where there's.

[Christy Lee]

What if the kids are there?

[Tom Griswold]

Would you characterize your life as. I have the perfect amount of sex. I have not enough sex. I have more sex than I can handle.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, that's a good question.

[Bob Kevoian]

That would be a. That'd be a great survey because I think it would skew very heavily toward men.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Bob Kevoian]

And I think the answers would vary significantly.

[Christy Lee]

All the men would say, not enough, and the women would say, perfect.

[Chick McGee]

Huh?

[Bob Kevoian]

No, no, they'd say too much.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, I don't. Wow.

[Pat Godwin]

I don't think so.

[Christy Lee]

I don't think so. I think they'd say perfect.

[Bob Kevoian]

I don't think so.

[Chick McGee]

I don't know. Women. If women are. It's you. You're in charge. It's up to you.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

So it should be the perfect amount for you.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Thank you.

[Tom Griswold]

What do you do if you hear a no, though, Josh?

[Chick McGee]

I pout.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Now, I don't get mad, and I don't. But inside I'm pouting.

[Tom Griswold]

Big powder. Me too.

[Bob Kevoian]

You don't put the ball gag on and say, I'll be back in an hour. See if you change your mind.

[Chick McGee]

It's occurred to me to do that.

[Tom Griswold]

This is called the mind change.

[Chick McGee]

Another hour is another 300.

[Tom Griswold]

Dear Bob and Tom show. While watching the Philadelphia Phillies game last night, I suddenly heard a very familiar song playing in the background as Alex Bomb's walk up song. Yes, that's right.

[Chick McGee]

I'd like to think we had a little something to do with the.

[Tom Griswold]

I would hope so. Proof that good music has no age limit. The second it came on, I could practically. I could hear Chick trying to explain to everyone what a walk up song is while Pat started singing backup vocals. I was lucky enough to catch Pat, Jeff, and Kostaki and Tiffin a few weeks back. A wonderful show. Thank you guys for taking a picture with me, too. Longtime listener, very special Katie from Erie, Pennsylvania.

[Bob Kevoian]

All right, well, speaking about Mr. Godwin singing, you had agreed to sing one of your.

[Chick McGee]

You know what?

[Pat Godwin]

I'm gonna have to come clean. When you went to me and chicks, when you come to me during the course of the show, I should be ready. That's my job.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Pat Godwin]

I was doing a side hustle at the time. Typically, the first hour, I just. I interject, and I'm not really called upon Much. So I thought, I'm gonna take it. So since Monday, I've been setting poems to music for 50 bucks a pop.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Very nice.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah. So I'll be honest with you. When I. He went to me. I should have. I. I made 100 bucks.

[Bob Kevoian]

Would you like to favor.

[Tom Griswold]

We All Coast.

[Pat Godwin]

They come from all walks of life. Life, men and women. Will.

[Bob Kevoian]

So someone has submitted you a poem.

[Pat Godwin]

Some someone. Bunch of people.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah. Well, let's hear it. Could we hear one of them?

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah. I'm trying to tell you what's going on.

[Tom Griswold]

See, now this is where. This is where I disagree with Tom. Seems to be very much an adversarial.

[Bob Kevoian]

Limited amount of times.

[Chick McGee]

I was clearly setting something up.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

So typically, since Monday, I've been banging out maybe three. Three in that first hour. And so I have two done so far. All walks of life, men and women. I put a melody to it. 50 bucks. The only thing is, the only stipulation is I'm not allowed to change any of the lyrics. Okay, okay, here's the first one. Who has the prettiest legs around? I do. Who has the loveliest evening gown? I do. But life is tough. Life is hard. Especially here in the prison yard. Who had the tightest little buns in town? I did. So that's 50 bucks. There you go, right there.

[Chick McGee]

That's a nice 50 bucks. Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Thank you, Spike.

[Tom Griswold]

Mike.

[Pat Godwin]

And the next one. You want to hear the second one?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, sure.

[Pat Godwin]

Because I'm being honest. You're absolutely right, chick. He goes to me.

[Jessica Alman]

Boom.

[Pat Godwin]

I should have something, right?

[Tom Griswold]

Boom.

[Pat Godwin]

That's my job.

[Tom Griswold]

That's right.

[Pat Godwin]

This one is from.

[Tom Griswold]

He's not. He's never unreasonable at all.

[Pat Godwin]

No, says Pat. Since you are a divorced dad too, you may have. Okay, this is the divorced dad one. He says this is kind of in the form of a Hallmark greeting card. He'd like this song put to music. Now this one's a little tougher. It's got a lot of emotion here. It's called Dear Princess. It's about his daughter. He says, oh, my little five year old daughter. Dear Princess, your mom and I are getting divorced. It's not your fault. Seems our marriage has run its course. But we'll be here for you. Put aside our differences. That's what parents are for. Signed, Love, Daddy.

[Jessica Alman]

Lovely.

[Pat Godwin]

P.S. your mother's a whore. I'm not allowed to change.

[Tom Griswold]

Of course. It was a stipulation.

[Bob Kevoian]

We'll return with more of these. I'm enjoying this very much. We also have intimacy in your vehicle. Coming up in survey form and tip form. These are the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Announcer]

Add to or continue the conversation. Check out the Bob and Tom show on Facebook. Get the [e-mail] this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Tom Griswold]

Is that. Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom show where the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. There's Chrissy Lee at the Neo's desk.

[Christy Lee]

Hi.

[Tom Griswold]

There's Pat Godwin. Hello. There's Josh Arnold. Hello, hello. There's Ace Cosby. Howdy, howdy do. I'm Chick McGee. Hello. Tom, where are you?

[Chick McGee]

What are you doing?

[Bob Kevoian]

I'm over here. Thank you very much. A couple quick things. The Bob and Tom popped pop up store has once again popped up. It has arisen. We have some cool stuff there. Check it out if you get a chance. Now we have your letters, of course, always of interest. What's going on out there? We'd like to hear from you. You can reach us Bob and Tom at bob and tom dot com. Chick McGee, you're giving me the look.

[Tom Griswold]

You got something. Dear Bob and Tom show, this past Saturday I jumped on the super shower bandwagon. Something I talked about last week, I believe. Every now and then on Saturdays I have a super shower. Saturday, Saturday. I love it. I give myself a little extra attention. Tom, that's good. Maybe you should try that some, maybe some eucalyptus. Maybe some extra detailing, as you would say.

[Christy Lee]

Maybe some nice body scrub.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, put some swabs into action there,

[Bob Kevoian]

the nooks right there in the shower. You got your swabs and I.

[Tom Griswold]

As far as you know. Yes. Let's see. I haven't been that patient and pampered under a shower in quite a while. Since my first super shower. Band and bandwagon. Thank you, Chick. I'm worried this might not be a weekend only activity though. I'd like to take another super shower Saturday during the first segment of your 8 o' clock Eastern program today. So as by my calculation he might be getting in to the shower in an hour for a super shower Saturday. So I don't miss anything funny during that segment. Tom, can you provide an extended preamble as to lead in to tell me what I. What I might have missed while I was showering.

[Bob Kevoian]

I can, I can set up a pad for a song. We can do whatever you.

[Tom Griswold]

That's Ron in Phoenix. Thank you, Ron.

[Bob Kevoian]

Thank you, Ron. Now let's just move forward here and at this point maybe if Ron were getting in the shower right now, he wouldn't miss anything because we're gonna head to the Sports Bay.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, alrighty. You like the Cavaliers, Tom? Are you just a Browns guy? I mean, being from Cleveland?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, they were. They had it all going on until Jalen Brunson.

[Bob Kevoian]

Then came Brunson sparked One of the

[Tom Griswold]

NBA's greatest postseason comebacks in history. A rally from a 22 point deficit in the four quarter. And Brunson finished with 38 points as the Knicks beat the Cavaliers. 115. 104.

[Bob Kevoian]

It's Christy. It's the theme from the TV show.

[Tom Griswold]

Then overtime.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I know that.

[Tom Griswold]

Now you know. Stop the music. I need to tell you something. As I was watching the highlights this morning, Knicks put the Cavaliers away late after Cavs being head by 22 points. There's a very good basketball player on the Knicks named Mikhail Bridges. And I hesitated in my.

[Bob Kevoian]

In my brain.

[Tom Griswold]

I said, I can't mention him because then he'll play the theme from Mikhail's name.

[Christy Lee]

Yes, and.

[Tom Griswold]

And. Well, now, Christine, here we are.

[Bob Kevoian]

Now, yesterday we were discussing the Kennedys, and I mentioned, of course, a PT109. The famous. The true story of President Kennedy helping to rescue his crew. It's an amazing story.

[Tom Griswold]

That's the way the fairy tale goes.

[Bob Kevoian]

Not a fairy tale. And the President had. On his desk, he had the coconut that he had carved.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, you can't break that.

[Chick McGee]

Oh,

[Bob Kevoian]

it's a great movie with Cliff Robertson, who, by the way, interestingly enough, does not affect the Boston accent.

[Christy Lee]

I have not seen pt109.

[Bob Kevoian]

Great movie.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Chick McGee]

Nice piece of science fiction.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, Just watch Shrek. That's as real as what is

[Bob Kevoian]

now here. So I'm leading to a question. Yeah, PT109. Name of the movie, name of the book. The actual PT boat. That. Not to be confused with the PT Cruiser.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, it's not. See, this whole time, I was picturing a tiny little sort of car in the sea. You think we're morons?

[Bob Kevoian]

This leads to the question, what was the.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, my God.

[Bob Kevoian]

You know, the PT boat? They were made of plywood, Christie. That's why they were so fast. Oh, they were great. Yeah. Now, they, of course, had torpedoes. Now, do you remember the. The boat, the PT number? The designation, if you will, of McHale's navy?

[Christy Lee]

God, no. Why would I know that? I've never seen.

[Tom Griswold]

No one knows that but you, Tom. I do.

[Christy Lee]

113 or something, please.

[Tom Griswold]

73.

[Bob Kevoian]

PT 73 from McHale's Navy. What a great show.

[Christy Lee]

Were they all on that one boat.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

McHale's Navy, 1873.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Chick McGee]

It's official. It's absolutely official. Tom no longer cares if people listen to the show.

[Christy Lee]

No, he doesn't.

[Bob Kevoian]

He doesn't listen to these big horns.

[Chick McGee]

Listen to this. Big horn.

[Pat Godwin]

Horns.

[Bob Kevoian]

This is. You got Gruber. They're going to New Caledonia. Oh, it's great.

[Chick McGee]

Who's the guy I like that does the close up Magic and Carl Ballington. I love Carl Ballinger.

[Bob Kevoian]

Carl Bell Valentine was one of the

[Chick McGee]

crew members and I like. But my favorite, though is Joe whoever.

[Tom Griswold]

The Joe Flynn.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, that guy's funny.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah. And then.

[Christy Lee]

So you've actually seen this show?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, it was. This was a sick day. TV for.

[Christy Lee]

Okay. All right.

[Bob Kevoian]

And they. The one guy ended up being Captain Stubing.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, sure. Yeah. Gavin McLeod.

[Tom Griswold]

I forget his name on the show, though.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, it's been a while, but great. Even like Sully, they don't make a great. I think. I think. I think Sully ended up in jail, actually. I think that was a very unfortunate. One of the. One of the crew members had an affection for. Well, just. Let's just not go there. I think that would be.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, look at this. Jason Kidd out as coach of the Mavericks after five seasons. Two weeks after the club hired former Raptors executive Messiah Jiri as team president and governor.

[Bob Kevoian]

Jason still gets paid, by the way.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, yeah. The team says it's parting ways with kid. Two Ds describing the move as a mutual decision.

[Bob Kevoian]

Quick. 40 million.

[Christy Lee]

Good for him.

[Tom Griswold]

Boom.

[Christy Lee]

And my first interview ever on espn. Jason Kid.

[Tom Griswold]

I remember when he was downtown.

[Christy Lee]

That's exactly when I did it.

[Tom Griswold]

And he caught him. And I forget who the other guy was, but they were just babies coming out of.

[Christy Lee]

And they were like 17 or 18 years old.

[Tom Griswold]

Chiefs were. Wide receiver Rasheed Rice has been sentenced to serve 30 days in jail after testing positive for marijuana in violation of terms of probation for his role in that crash. Crash that left multiple people injured on a Dallas highway two years ago. Remember that Rashida race? I don't know. Going about 1 150, 155. I'm not sure what it was, but. So he was on probation.

[Bob Kevoian]

You ever see the sequel to PT109? He's still talking about BT110. Not good.

[Chick McGee]

It wasn't. No, it was uneventful.

[Tom Griswold]

What do you think PT109's made up? What do you watch? BT110.

[Bob Kevoian]

They really had to get.

[Tom Griswold]

That's a real.

[Bob Kevoian]

Jackie. Jackie Kennedy's in it.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, by the way, speaking of baseball. You know what we had last night? What? An inside the park grand slam Home run.

[Chick McGee]

This is this second one.

[Bob Kevoian]

There was one a couple weeks ago.

[Tom Griswold]

There was an inside the. Was there. Was it a. Was that one a grand slam? James Wood took a Little League grand slam to major league proportions. Here he goes, everybody's on base, and he hits the ball deep and, oh, it's off his glove. And that's when the fun starts.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, they occasionally call this a Little League grand slam because, you know, the

[Tom Griswold]

guy who just dropped that ball goes back to the dugout, and Pat simply tells him, you should have caught that.

[Chick McGee]

Well, that guy was safe by a mile, too. It was not even a. Oh, no, absolutely.

[Bob Kevoian]

He dives for the ball.

[Tom Griswold]

That is left fielder of the Mets, Nick Morabito.

[Chick McGee]

I don't understand. So he. The guy who dives for the ball, doesn't catch the ball and he falls on his ass.

[Tom Griswold]

Right, right.

[Chick McGee]

The other guy stands there an inordinate amount of time just looking at it instead of chasing the ball.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Let's see now.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, he's.

[Bob Kevoian]

Oh, no, he's. He's. He can't.

[Christy Lee]

He.

[Bob Kevoian]

He thinks the balls. He.

[Chick McGee]

Oh. And the guy is pointing to the ball. I see.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

He thinks the ball.

[Bob Kevoian]

Got you. I got you.

[Chick McGee]

He was so close to the. He couldn't. He couldn't see the. The ball for the tree.

[Pat Godwin]

Thought it went over the fence.

[Tom Griswold]

I think that's a little parable.

[Chick McGee]

He couldn't see the.

[Tom Griswold]

You can't see the ball.

[Chick McGee]

You couldn't see the ballpark for the ball. Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

No, that's right.

[Chick McGee]

If you can't see the forest for

[Bob Kevoian]

the trees, you can't see the testicles for the. What?

[Tom Griswold]

I.

[Bob Kevoian]

Something like something. Yeah, we got it. Okay. You nailed it.

[Tom Griswold]

That's some good broadcasting right there. That's all there is.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Write that down.

[Tom Griswold]

WNBA game last night. Toronto beat Phoenix 98. 90. And look at this, where we are, stupid world records. Good one. What?

[Bob Kevoian]

It's a good. It takes place at sea. This is really interesting.

[Tom Griswold]

David Rush has broken the Guinness World Record for the most toothpicks broken in one minute.

[Christy Lee]

How's that at what?

[Bob Kevoian]

He's on a Disney cruise.

[Tom Griswold]

Rush tackled the title during a Disney cruise.

[Chick McGee]

He can't even enjoy a family vacation.

[Tom Griswold]

He snapped a total of 84 toothpicks in 60 seconds to beat the previous record of 58.

[Bob Kevoian]

Oh, it's great. He got the whole crowd involved.

[Chick McGee]

He forced them to.

[Tom Griswold]

He's quite the showman.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, he probably got a free Trip out of him.

[Bob Kevoian]

If you watch the video, there's some lady behind him. Looks like she's going, where's Mickey Mouse? What the hell is this?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Why. Why are we so you have to. Individually.

[Chick McGee]

The whole crowd involved. He said. How many people would you say are there?

[Ali Breen]

8.

[Pat Godwin]

Look how bored they are.

[Christy Lee]

I know.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, that one kid is like falling asleep.

[Bob Kevoian]

You got to break them completely in half.

[Christy Lee]

This is ridiculous.

[Tom Griswold]

There are eight.

[Chick McGee]

There are less than eight people.

[Bob Kevoian]

He destroys the record.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, a crowd of passengers gathered to watch. It says here.

[Chick McGee]

That is not a crowd.

[Tom Griswold]

No, that's not a problem.

[Chick McGee]

A few passersby.

[Tom Griswold]

Rush said he had to recruit official timers and witnesses to make sure everything was legit. The ships on board celebrity juggler.

[Christy Lee]

What, is that real?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. James Buster even stepped in to help judge.

[Bob Kevoian]

Do they have any juggling in the video? I love juggling.

[Tom Griswold]

If the two piece. These pieces don't separate completely. The toothpick meaning if even a tiniest sliver of wood fiber keeps them connected. The whole toothpick.

[Bob Kevoian]

The next day, people who ordered club sandwiches were really, really pissed.

[Christy Lee]

Is yours falling apart?

[Chick McGee]

Mine sure is.

[Tom Griswold]

And this is what makes Tom just a liar. This sentence right here. It was 60 seconds of chaos.

[Christy Lee]

Chaos.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. He's throwing toothpicks everywhere.

[Christy Lee]

He was barely. It was like.

[Tom Griswold]

We all saw the video.

[Bob Kevoian]

He's breaking them in half.

[Christy Lee]

And he didn't seem that hurt.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, we do have. Yeah, we have video evidence that no one. It wasn't chaos. The whole was it Ship didn't gather around.

[Bob Kevoian]

He was on the Disney cruise. Was it at least Goofy. Goofy nothing. Okay. I thought it was fascinating.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Bob Kevoian]

You ever had a club sandwich and bitten into one of those toothpicks?

[Tom Griswold]

I have not. Because, you know, when the club sandwich comes, I look at it and I pull it right out of the sandwich.

[Chick McGee]

Well, oftentimes they have a cellophane little flag.

[Bob Kevoian]

They should all have that. That should be federal law. I had a. I. I got skewered by one at a very famous restaurant here in town.

[Tom Griswold]

That's a big bite.

[Bob Kevoian]

Also, I have witnesses.

[Tom Griswold]

I. I can't imagine that. That. That incident wasn't your fault somehow.

[Bob Kevoian]

Oh, I pulled out the one with the thing on it. There was another one hidden inside.

[Chick McGee]

They must have known who you were.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Almost on purpose. Would you say it was all. It must have been on purpose.

[Bob Kevoian]

Purpose. And then I pulled the sandwich away and I was spewing blood out of my upper.

[Christy Lee]

My God.

[Chick McGee]

Did they give it to you for free?

[Tom Griswold]

That's the thing they didn't.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, that's foolish. Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Don't you think they'd go, hey, oh, believe me, I've.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

And it was. I was with a party of 12 at the time.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, damn. That whole meal would have.

[Tom Griswold]

Can you imagine? That would have put him having a meal, a party at 12. He's just bored. Addressing the crowd while I was leading

[Bob Kevoian]

an important discussion about the importance of

[Tom Griswold]

west side Story, the importance of unregistering

[Bob Kevoian]

most American voters, and many meeting resistance for a couple of. Couple of the comments.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, I'm glad you. I'm glad you're okay about spewing blood from your mouth. A hidden toothpick in a sandwich was brutal. I can tell.

[Bob Kevoian]

I have a witness if you don't believe me. I just think talking about it makes me kind of want to coat my bet.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah. So watch out for those. Toothpaste. You know the famous actor George Peppard? He almost died from a toothpick.

[Tom Griswold]

It pierced his intestine.

[Bob Kevoian]

It's a famous, famous story.

[Chick McGee]

Thankfully, Mr. T was there to Heimlich.

[Tom Griswold]

I pity the toothpick. Who wants to hurt my man George?

[Bob Kevoian]

Now, Christy, do you use toothpaste at home?

[Christy Lee]

I do have toothpicks, yes.

[Bob Kevoian]

You have the kind that have the little curly cube.

[Christy Lee]

I have both. I have the curly Q ones, and I have the plain ones.

[Bob Kevoian]

I'm gonna surprise you guys. I ordered something yesterday. It's gonna be very exciting.

[Christy Lee]

I can't wait.

[Tom Griswold]

We get to watch you pick your teeth every morning now, along with everything else you're doing.

[Bob Kevoian]

As you know, I get the high quality.

[Tom Griswold]

Of course you do.

[Bob Kevoian]

The coffee stir.

[Tom Griswold]

Stir sticks. You like the wood stir sticks like the wooden ones.

[Bob Kevoian]

But you got to get the good ones because the cheap ones splinter. Yeah. You suck on them and get a sweater in your lips.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Now I'm adding to that. Monogrammed paddles, stirring sticks.

[Chick McGee]

How about that?

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, these are good. They really are.

[Chick McGee]

Now, the paddle. You hold the paddle, or, you know,

[Bob Kevoian]

the paddle goes down into the liquid. But I.

[Christy Lee]

You received those as a gift.

[Bob Kevoian]

I know, and I like them so much now I'm getting them with the Bob and Tom show logo.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, my God.

[Chick McGee]

Well, how about that?

[Bob Kevoian]

I ordered them yesterday.

[Christy Lee]

Is that our Christmas present?

[Bob Kevoian]

No, your Christmas present's even funnier. I've already. I already found that over. One of our listeners sent me the I. I to want to see.

[Pat Godwin]

So that ink goes in the hot beverage. Is that what you're saying?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, that's what.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah. And I'm I ordered the LSD 25.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, good.

[Bob Kevoian]

That's the good stuff, you guys. Oh, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Stuff the CIA invented, I think.

[Tom Griswold]

Obviously.

[Bob Kevoian]

Obviously. Couldn't touch this.

[Tom Griswold]

24 got recalled.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah. Now, where were we? Oh, I know.

[Christy Lee]

We are moving on.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, we are. Christy, talk about your car.

[Christy Lee]

I would love to, Chick. It's the Hyundai Hybrid. That's right. I have the Tucson hybrid. But all of Hyundai's hybrid hybrids have great fuel efficiency. You know what their award winning safety, latest in technology, reliability is unmatched. You'll find a great warranty on your hybrid. If you're looking for something a little bit more of a crossover suv, I highly recommend the Tucson. But if you want something a little bit more rugged, a little bit more off roadish, try the Santa Fe hybrid. It holds more cargo and it'll go a little bit more in the danger zone, if you will.

[Bob Kevoian]

Highway to the danger zone.

[Christy Lee]

Hybrids from Hyundai get the best of both worlds. Visit HyundaiUSA.com call 562-314-4603 for all the details. And if you're not familiar, I'll pull a tom. Hybrids do not need to be plugged in. They automatically charge while you're driving. The battery charges and helps.

[Bob Kevoian]

They're using hybrid technology at the Indy 500 this weekend.

[Christy Lee]

They are cool. Check it out.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yesterday, in spite of the fact that it was raining sideways, 60 miles an hour, I stopped, put gas in the vehicle that I was driving. Yes, Josh, I want you to verify this. I'm gonna show you my credit card thing. Can you see the top, what that says this was?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I see. $200.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, that's what they're doing now at these gas stations, when you put your card in, they'll charge you 200 bucks or 150 bucks in advance, and then they refund the difference.

[Christy Lee]

That doesn't seem fair.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, it's happening all the time now at all these places. I'm not sure what the law worry

[Christy Lee]

about it because I have a hybrid.

[Bob Kevoian]

Something about. Probably about the magic of compound interest. I'm not sure what's happening here, but isn't that amazing?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

200 bucks. Wasn't even my car, so.

[Chick McGee]

Sheesh.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, That's a long story involving a flat tire and a borrowed car. I won't go into it. Thank you, Jerry.

[Christy Lee]

Check out Hyundai, Hyundai USA.com.

[Bob Kevoian]

second flat tire.

[Chick McGee]

I bet Jerry. Jerry's putting those screws and nails on the street. Yeah, so that you fill up his tank.

[Bob Kevoian]

Jerry's a big fella, and I'm not afraid of nobody. Well, you'd be afraid of Jerry.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, boy.

[Bob Kevoian]

I'm gonna have Jerry come over to your place.

[Chick McGee]

Come get it, Jerry.

[Tom Griswold]

Get some Jerry.

[Bob Kevoian]

I got him. I got him a nice Triple X.

[Chick McGee]

What if I come in tomorrow with a neck brace and my arms in one of those, like, steel slings and

[Tom Griswold]

we ask what happened? And you just say, jerry?

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, Jerry stayed open late to fix my tire.

[Chick McGee]

Well, that's nice.

[Bob Kevoian]

It was nice seeing him for the second time in a wing.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, he's not the guy whose car you borrowed?

[Bob Kevoian]

No. No.

[Chick McGee]

Gotcha.

[Bob Kevoian]

I had to borrow a car because I had to take Finn somewhere and I had a flat tire.

[Chick McGee]

My theory is that whoever your car you're borrowing is puncturing your tires so that you fill up their tank every time.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. 200 bucks.

[Bob Kevoian]

Unbelievable. When we come back, we'll Hear more about pt 73.

[Chick McGee]

We will.

[Bob Kevoian]

Pt 109. We have.

[Tom Griswold]

He doesn't care if anyone listens.

[Bob Kevoian]

We have. We have vehicular intimacy. If you have a good story for us on that topic, by all means, send it to us. We don't need to be too graphic. By the way, I spent a great deal of time de graphing some of the stories coming up this morning. Here from the O'Reilly Auto Part Studios, this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Tom Griswold]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. Did you just fart and. Or belch into your microphone?

[Christy Lee]

I hit my name. I did that.

[Bob Kevoian]

Okay. Sorry, Sorry.

[Tom Griswold]

It was Christy. Hello, Christy.

[Christy Lee]

Hello, Chick.

[Tom Griswold]

She's at the news desk. There's Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hey, Chick.

[Tom Griswold]

There's Josh Arnold.

[Chick McGee]

Christy. Who's no longer allowed to speak during the commercials.

[Tom Griswold]

Christy just told us one of the saddest stories.

[Bob Kevoian]

Now I was out of the way.

[Chick McGee]

It cannot be repeated.

[Tom Griswold]

No, it can't be repeated. But keep in mind who's saying this? It's the saddest story I've ever heard.

[Christy Lee]

It's pretty sad.

[Tom Griswold]

There's Ace Cosby. Hello. I am.

[Christy Lee]

She's doing fine now.

[Chick McGee]

She looked us in the eyes and just broke our hearts.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, with this.

[Bob Kevoian]

I don't want to hear this.

[Chick McGee]

No, you don't.

[Christy Lee]

No, you don't.

[Chick McGee]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Should we. Should we have an obituary segment on the show?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, the person's not dead. It's not dead. They're not dead.

[Pat Godwin]

Not dead yet.

[Tom Griswold]

He's ruefully still alive.

[Bob Kevoian]

Not dead yet.

[Tom Griswold]

He's fine.

[Bob Kevoian]

There's a great. There's a great idea for a segment.

[Christy Lee]

He's Fine.

[Bob Kevoian]

Welcome to Not Dead Yet.

[Tom Griswold]

So today's guest, Mel Brooks.

[Chick McGee]

So, sir, you're not dead yet.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, I'm not.

[Bob Kevoian]

But a pretty GD close.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, we've got some video just into the office here of. You know how Josh. I do this especially for Josh. He gets. Because he sends me these videos all the time, and I'm so excited that I get to see one. I think before you've seen it. Oh, there's a robot.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, no.

[Tom Griswold]

Who dances like Michael Jackson. All right. Or he tries to. There he is.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Chick McGee]

Look at this guy.

[Tom Griswold]

Wait a minute. Has a little trouble. Okay. Me

[Chick McGee]

stumbled on some steps.

[Tom Griswold]

Y. Y.

[Pat Godwin]

That's h. He recover.

[Tom Griswold]

Moonwalk. Can't do it as well as Michael does.

[Bob Kevoian]

That's pretty good, though.

[Tom Griswold]

Turning around and then.

[Pat Godwin]

That's hilarious.

[Christy Lee]

He cannot handle stairs.

[Ali Breen]

Holy.

[Tom Griswold]

No stairs. No stairs for the robot.

[Pat Godwin]

He is not making a comeback.

[Tom Griswold]

He has short circuited.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, Jim, do we know where that was from?

[Tom Griswold]

So let me tell you, when the. Oh, no, he's down. Jim. If.

[Announcer]

If.

[Tom Griswold]

When. I'm not. If. When the robots attacked, we just play some Michael Jackson and they all start trying to dance and they'll fall over.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

There we go. There's the end of your movie. Oh, yeah, he's still there.

[Chick McGee]

Apparently there's a touch more of something. Here comes. Here comes the human being.

[Pat Godwin]

Are you okay, buddy?

[Jeff Oskay]

The check on him.

[Bob Kevoian]

Well, if this is. If this is in. Is it in Russia somewhere?

[Tom Griswold]

In Japan, I believe.

[Bob Kevoian]

Okay, it was in Russia. That guy's now making cleaning robots in the gulag.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

You know, Putin's in the audience with a little switch.

[Chick McGee]

Tom, you weren't wrong, though. That thing could dance pretty well for a little bit.

[Bob Kevoian]

They're getting. Yeah, these humanoid robots are getting very, very good.

[Chick McGee]

Some theme park puts the right disguise on these things. You know, the animatronics. It's gonna be amazing.

[Bob Kevoian]

Amazing.

[Christy Lee]

Wow.

[Bob Kevoian]

But, yeah, that one. That's pretty fun.

[Tom Griswold]

They're not familiar with the concept of steps yet, though.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, no, no. When they. When they go down, man, it's like me falling. It takes forever. There's a lot of flailing, slow motion.

[Tom Griswold]

I've done it.

[Christy Lee]

You're not falling often.

[Chick McGee]

No, but when I fall, I've been told it. It lasts a long time.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I fell a couple months ago at a service station. It was exciting. And I got my foot put. I was putting gas in my car and I tried to step over.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah. Tripped over the hose.

[Tom Griswold]

Tripped over the hose. And it took me about 45 minutes to finally hit the ground with my face. Oh, man.

[Chick McGee]

Did people come over?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

They make a.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, look, Chick just fell. Are you okay, buddy?

[Bob Kevoian]

Hey, don't get him up. I want to get a picture.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah. Can you sign my wife's boob?

[Chick McGee]

Sure. While you're still laying.

[Tom Griswold]

And when I hit my head on. I think I got a tiny little bit of a concussion because I heard like a high pitched song.

[Chick McGee]

Have you ever heard. Greg Warren, our. Our friend has told the story. He fell down. He was at a. Some sporting event and it was super crowded and he fell down. Metal bleachers.

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Chick McGee]

And just how loud that is and how everybody. There, there.

[Tom Griswold]

Plenty of time to find out. Follow the sound. Follow the sound. Find the body. Yeah, he said it hurt.

[Chick McGee]

He was fine, but it hurt. It was just the loudest thing. And so everybody was. Are you all right? Is everything. I mean, the whole thing, you know, we.

[Christy Lee]

You know, I used to joke about older people, but I understand now. There's something about your orientation that goes away at a certain point and you're like. That step is. Oh, yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Now, have we completed our sports?

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, sir, we have.

[Bob Kevoian]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Game two tonight between the spurs and the Thunder in San Antonio. See if.

[Christy Lee]

Who do we want to win all

[Tom Griswold]

of this Victor Wembanya drama?

[Chick McGee]

We like Vicky. Vicky. Wim. Wim.

[Tom Griswold]

We like the Vicki and the Spurs. I like Shea, though. And the. And the Thunder.

[Christy Lee]

The Thunder seemed to be

[Tom Griswold]

cv. Oh, no, not cv. Cw. Conventional wisdom tells us that the actual NBA championship is now in the Western finals between the spurs and the Thunder.

[Chick McGee]

Well, tonight.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Whoever wins this is not going to be. And then the east coast, the Nicks and the Cavaliers.

[Christy Lee]

Who's dead?

[Pat Godwin]

Chris is telling a story again.

[Bob Kevoian]

Christie's new favorite segment.

[Chick McGee]

No, no, the.

[Christy Lee]

No, this.

[Chick McGee]

The subject being discussed. Wishes. This song we're playing.

[Christy Lee]

The subject is not dead and is fine.

[Tom Griswold]

When we tell you what happened, you two are going to say, that is the saddest thing I've ever heard.

[Bob Kevoian]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Bob Kevoian]

So does this involve an animal or

[Chick McGee]

a human Animal, which is always a little sadder. Yeah, I know.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Bob Kevoian]

Okay. All right.

[Chick McGee]

Hey.

[Christy Lee]

New research.

[Tom Griswold]

An animal with a little bit of understanding. Oh, I'm sorry. Go ahead. Yes. Sorry.

[Christy Lee]

New research reveals the hidden risks and realities of engaging in sexual activity while driving.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Christy Lee]

I don't think anybody.

[Chick McGee]

While driving.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. I needed this.

[Tom Griswold]

I have never completed while moving.

[Christy Lee]

In a moving vehicle.

[Tom Griswold]

I have. In a parked car.

[Christy Lee]

Certainly scientists. I'm an American.

[Chick McGee]

Sure.

[Christy Lee]

University. We'll get to that in A second. Scientists at the University of South Dakota surveyed about 1,000 undergrads and discovered nearly a third had engaged in sexual activity in a moving vehicle. The most common acts reported were. I love how he wrote this. Oral activities and a variety of touching.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

I removed words. I removed words that had. I don't know.

[Christy Lee]

I know.

[Bob Kevoian]

Maybe the word finger was. I tried to be a little bit more delicate.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Full penetration action was relatively.

[Bob Kevoian]

I made change it to full penetrative action.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Which I think, isn't it?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, I think the classic is if you're driving, the guy's driving and the girl straddles him and he can still see the road, but she's sitting on his lap. Right? Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Nine percent of students say they did that.

[Chick McGee]

Nine percent.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow. That seems.

[Chick McGee]

Did you say students?

[Tom Griswold]

This is.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, they're undergrads at college.

[Bob Kevoian]

While the vehicle is in motion.

[Christy Lee]

Correct.

[Tom Griswold]

Right.

[Bob Kevoian]

That's insane.

[Christy Lee]

Many described the situation as a form of erotic foreplay that occurred while they were trying to quickly get to a final destination. Well, I bet they were. Survey also revealed a massive gap in physical pleasure between men and women.

[Tom Griswold]

Huh.

[Christy Lee]

When prompted to recall if they achieved an orgasm during their most recent experience in a moving vehicle, roughly 2/3 of men said yes. Only about one fifth of women said they had an orgasm.

[Bob Kevoian]

All right.

[Christy Lee]

A small number of respondents said they experienced the worst sex of their lives.

[Chick McGee]

Well, that's because the Uber driver wouldn't shut up.

[Bob Kevoian]

I thought it was the airbag going off, but either one.

[Tom Griswold]

Where you from? Where you from? Huh? Wow.

[Bob Kevoian]

I have a question. Maybe Mr. Oskay knows the answer to this. I have not been in one of these Waymox

[Christy Lee]

self driving taxis.

[Bob Kevoian]

Self driving taxis. Do they have cameras in them?

[Chick McGee]

They must.

[Bob Kevoian]

Are they watching to make sure people don't get in them and start canoodling?

[Chick McGee]

And I'm sure I don't know about whether it's an anti sex thing or if it's just a safety. Yeah, Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

I mean, what if I would want

[Chick McGee]

cameras in there in case something goes wrong? They could go back and look at

[Bob Kevoian]

the cameras, tell me somebody had a heart attack or whatever.

[Chick McGee]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

Would you take away most of the somewhere? Yeah. You would?

[Chick McGee]

Sure.

[Tom Griswold]

Boy, I'm skittish.

[Christy Lee]

Me too.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Don't care for it.

[Bob Kevoian]

Okay, well, we'll see. I'm just wondering because this would be, you know, it's three in the morning, a bunch of drunks coming out of a bar, you know they're going to hook up in a back of a Waymo.

[Chick McGee]

You would think that is happening. Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

And that would. That. I would think that would also be showing up on the Internet.

[Chick McGee]

I also think there should be drive companies who will. Before this. This.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, I see.

[Tom Griswold]

There you go.

[Christy Lee]

They'll let you do it.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

They encourage you to do it.

[Tom Griswold]

Don't they have Mile High Club airline, so.

[Chick McGee]

Right, right.

[Bob Kevoian]

So there was. Yeah, there was a. There was a service I think out of Cincinnati where you could go and you get on the plane and they would.

[Christy Lee]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, you go up complete and

[Bob Kevoian]

you come back down again. That's ridiculous.

[Chick McGee]

Well, they're not. They're not flying the plane. No, but I mean, although you can. I mean, flying is really just one button.

[Tom Griswold]

Who are you to declare? It's ridiculous.

[Bob Kevoian]

Awkward for the pilot.

[Christy Lee]

This kind of activity has really fallen off with the lack of limos now because you don't see them as much as you used to.

[Chick McGee]

You don't see a limo as much as you used to? No.

[Christy Lee]

Back in the day.

[Bob Kevoian]

They're usually suburbans now anyway.

[Christy Lee]

Right.

[Chick McGee]

They were never super comfortable.

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Chick McGee]

A limo way too low to the ground.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, but you could stretch out.

[Bob Kevoian]

How do you know that?

[Christy Lee]

Never mind. 75% reported experiencing at least one type of negative driver safety consequence.

[Tom Griswold]

Chris, you got a little shum shum in that one.

[Christy Lee]

With over half admitting that the driver took their eyes off the road for more than two seconds. How I do that? Nobody in my lap.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, boy.

[Christy Lee]

Almost one quarter of the participants said their vehicle drifted into another lane.

[Bob Kevoian]

Whoops.

[Christy Lee]

One in five said the vehicle exceeded the speed limit. Some participants even noted that the driver completely let go of the steering wheel.

[Chick McGee]

Well, you got to grab that ass.

[Tom Griswold]

You gotta yell Yahtzee.

[Christy Lee]

Well, some of these cars have a self driving option, don't they, Jason?

[Chick McGee]

And yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Many participants.

[Bob Kevoian]

When it comes to mobile intimacy, you prefer to wait till the bus gets back to the station.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, it is harder on the bus.

[Christy Lee]

Many participants said they mitigated the danger by slowing their speed, turning on cruise control or pulling onto the shoulder of the highway to finish.

[Bob Kevoian]

And is it. I'm trying to think. Is it the World according to Garp?

[Announcer]

Where.

[Christy Lee]

Yep.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. They're parked in the driveway.

[Pat Godwin]

The driveway.

[Christy Lee]

That doesn't end well.

[Chick McGee]

Nope. No.

[Bob Kevoian]

Well, there's a famous.

[Chick McGee]

She bites off a little more than she could shoot, doesn't she?

[Christy Lee]

Yes, she does.

[Bob Kevoian]

Apparently when they have fatal plane crashes, they have to publish.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh God.

[Bob Kevoian]

A lot of the stuff about them. Right. And there was one famous one where the. They described the description of the decedent

[Chick McGee]

they described the description.

[Pat Godwin]

That's very descriptive.

[Chick McGee]

The only reason I said something is because you would have never let me get away with that.

[Bob Kevoian]

I'm sorry. In the description of.

[Tom Griswold]

How long do you think it takes to describe this? No, no.

[Bob Kevoian]

I'm stumbling on my words because I'm trying to make this palatable for the radio.

[Tom Griswold]

We're all adults here.

[Chick McGee]

She was either sleeping with her head in his lap. That right?

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah. A part of his anatomy was found. Found? Yes, in her. One of her cavities.

[Chick McGee]

And it wasn't a. Excuse me. You're gonna.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, that sounds dirtier than what I actually have. It was in a cabin.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

No, it's way I have tried to.

[Christy Lee]

Coming up, we're going to talk about tips for better car sex. This was in a moving vehicle. We're talking about other.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Pulling over.

[Bob Kevoian]

Not. Not a bad idea.

[Tom Griswold]

Luckily, we have one of the foremost experts in sex in a carnival lot. Oh, yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Parking lot. Driving.

[Jessica Alman]

You.

[Pat Godwin]

You name it. First experience. Mom. Station wagons.

[Tom Griswold]

No kidding.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, there you go. Let the imprinting begin.

[Chick McGee]

Go ahead.

[Bob Kevoian]

I'll just. Yeah, we won't. We won't comment.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, he didn't say mommy, station wagon.

[Chick McGee]

I was about to.

[Bob Kevoian]

We'll come. We'll come back with that interesting thing

[Tom Griswold]

and more descriptions of the. The descriptions. Yes.

[Bob Kevoian]

I'll try to delineate the aspect of the content of the sentence structure as we move forward.

[Chick McGee]

Real quick, Pat. Yeah. Your line is, I know, chick. So, Pat, you say, I had sex in a station wagon. Now, Chick, your line is woody.

[Pat Godwin]

I had sex at a station wagon.

[Tom Griswold]

Woody.

[Chick McGee]

And you say, of course I had sex.

[Pat Godwin]

Of course I had sex. I have a Woody first.

[Tom Griswold]

You can't shoot pool with a rope, can you?

[Bob Kevoian]

Fun Country Squire, was it?

[Chick McGee]

No, it was my girlfriend.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, I see. Come, we'll. We'll try to get back on the rails, if you will. From the O'Reilly Auto Part Studios, this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Announcer]

This is the Bob and Tom Show. Reach us toll free at 1-88-8-BOB-TOM1 [e-mail] this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Bob Kevoian]

Carb day.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Welcome back to the Bob and Tom show, the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. There's Christy Lee at the news desk.

[Christy Lee]

Hi.

[Tom Griswold]

There's Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hello.

[Tom Griswold]

There's Josh Arnold. Hi, there. There's Ace Cosby. Hello. I'm Chick McGee. And hello, Tom.

[Bob Kevoian]

Coming up, we're going to be saying goodbye to. Goodbye to a famous beer.

[Chick McGee]

Is that right?

[Bob Kevoian]

We'll get to that. That coming up. But right now, it's my understanding, through the magic of electricity, we're going to be hooking up with comedian Jeff Oskay.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, that's right.

[Jeff Oskay]

Hey, everybody.

[Tom Griswold]

He's a Jeff. He's at Wrigley Field.

[Jeff Oskay]

I am not. I'm in front of a large wall of ivy because I am here to talk about college and like Tom. Tom and I both attended an Ivy League school. Tom attended Columbia. I attend Ivy Tech, Both Ivy schools. I just got done with my first year of college. My kids also got done with college. This year. They go to a real college. I go to community college. And going up to visit them, I noticed there's some differences between community college and real college, and I thought I would share some of those with you today. For example, real college is where students carry video vape pens to class. Community college is where students hit vape pens during class. Real college students order doordash. Community college students deliver them their doordash. Real college has hot sorority girls going wild. Community college has hot single moms going to court for back child support. Is this on?

[Chick McGee]

No.

[Jeff Oskay]

See, I'm out in the world. We got a frog behind me. All right, let's try this one. Real college has students doing upside down margaritas. Community college has students upside down on their Dodge Challenger loans.

[Tom Griswold]

The days of being upside down there right now.

[Jeff Oskay]

At real college, students get drunk and stumble back to their dorms. At community college, students can't get drunk because we all have to drive home.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, that's.

[Jeff Oskay]

Real college has a marching band. Community college has a dude. A lowered Honda Civic bumping hot sauce on a pork chop sandwich in the faculty parking lot. Well, shout out to Jay Wick. Real college has students secretly popping Adderall. Community college has three dudes boldly smoking blunts behind a dumpster. Two more. Thank goodness. Real college loudly and proudly sing the fight song at games. Community college has students loudly and proudly fighting with their baby mamas on speakerphone in the lobby. And finally, real college students do jello shots. Community college students have mug shots. I'm Jeff Oska.

[Chick McGee]

This was the difference between community.

[Tom Griswold]

Very good, Jeff.

[Christy Lee]

Very nice.

[Bob Kevoian]

Thank you very much, Mr. Jeff Oski. That's all true, by the way. He is. Yeah, he went back to college.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, we're proud of him.

[Christy Lee]

Straight A's. Good job, Jeff.

[Bob Kevoian]

All right, now, we were talking about car sex. You had a survey, and this was in moving vehicles.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Which I. I mean, that's got to be incredibly dangerous.

[Chick McGee]

That's risky business.

[Pat Godwin]

Isn't it?

[Bob Kevoian]

It isn't. It is.

[Christy Lee]

I'm on the edge, buddy.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, it is.

[Christy Lee]

Come on.

[Tom Griswold]

No.

[Bob Kevoian]

Didn't you say 20% of them or something said they'd taken their eyes off the road?

[Christy Lee]

You take your eyes off the road.

[Bob Kevoian]

That's for important things like texting and changing the radio station.

[Tom Griswold]

What is it in Parenthood when Steve Martin looks at. I. I don't.

[Bob Kevoian]

I forget who.

[Chick McGee]

Mary Steenberg.

[Tom Griswold]

Mary Steenberg. Honey, why don't you tell the policeman how this happened or something?

[Chick McGee]

Show him, honey.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, that's right.

[Bob Kevoian]

But I mean, this survey, they. The percentage that had done it in a moving vehicle is quite.

[Christy Lee]

You were stunned.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah. And can you. If you.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm sorry, did you say 25.

[Bob Kevoian]

If you do it. If you're doing a threesome in a moving vehicle. A threesome in a moving vehicle. Can you be in the

[Tom Griswold]

diamond lane?

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah. Can you be in the diamond lane?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I would. I would try to argue that, yes.

[Bob Kevoian]

It's a kind of a carpool.

[Christy Lee]

That's kind of a hard thing to imagine.

[Bob Kevoian]

I couldn't see the third passenger there for a while. She must have had her head. Head somewhere.

[Christy Lee]

I think that went away with the bench seat. Remember the bench seat in the front?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

People could sit three across.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't think they make any. Any moving vehicle with a bench.

[Christy Lee]

Well, maybe a truck.

[Tom Griswold]

What do you think?

[Bob Kevoian]

There has to be one still out there. Oh, God, I. I used to love having that bench seat.

[Tom Griswold]

I know.

[Chick McGee]

I did, too.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

You take a turn too fast and she slide right into you. By the way.

[Bob Kevoian]

By the way, this is for parents out there. On different topic. My passenger seat is like a filing system. Okay, that's true. I've got all kinds of stuff.

[Tom Griswold]

You know what's there right now? Is it like gym clothes and some important reports.

[Bob Kevoian]

Probably some T shirts from the station I'm giving away and some other stuff.

[Tom Griswold]

All right, but that'll.

[Bob Kevoian]

There'll be various things, and then she

[Christy Lee]

gets in the car and you have to move it.

[Bob Kevoian]

All the kids are getting the car. But here's the. The problem. They should have more respect for my stuff. Maybe I've got my gym shoes, my gym short. Whatever.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Instead of just heaving them into the back.

[Chick McGee]

Well, this is your problem.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. It's not you.

[Chick McGee]

You tell them. Don't do that.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah,

[Bob Kevoian]

it's not working.

[Chick McGee]

He's looking at me like I am speaking another language.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, you can. You can. You can tell them what to do. You're their fault.

[Christy Lee]

You're allowed to discipline your own children?

[Bob Kevoian]

They beat me to the car, though. If they get there first.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, no, no.

[Chick McGee]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

No. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

If they beat. If they do. If they beat you to the car and they do it, you go. The next time you do that, I'm not taking you anywhere.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Just. What would happen. What would happen if you told Finn. You do that again. We're not. I'm not going to take you anywhere. What would she say?

[Chick McGee]

You imagine the laughter.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, no.

[Christy Lee]

She knows. He's not serious.

[Bob Kevoian]

I just think. Or when you get in someone else's car.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Bob Kevoian]

Don't. Do you. Then you use. Oh, I can see.

[Chick McGee]

I. I wait for them to clear the. The seats.

[Christy Lee]

Or did you just sit in the back?

[Bob Kevoian]

No, no.

[Tom Griswold]

You.

[Bob Kevoian]

But I think you should be respectful to whatever they're using because that's their.

[Chick McGee]

I am. Because I was disciplined as a child.

[Tom Griswold]

You have. You have manners and.

[Chick McGee]

Right, Right. I was taught how to behave by my stupid topic.

[Tom Griswold]

Wait a minute. Are you. Do you almost always or. Or insist on sitting in the front seat with your Uber driver?

[Bob Kevoian]

Often I do.

[Chick McGee]

What is the protocol?

[Tom Griswold]

Often? I never. I never, ever do.

[Christy Lee]

The only. Only time is if there's four people and we have to put somebody in the front seat. And we always ask first.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Christy Lee]

Is it all right if somebody sits in the front?

[Bob Kevoian]

I like being in front.

[Christy Lee]

We know.

[Bob Kevoian]

I also like overriding the directions they're getting from their phone.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, my God.

[Tom Griswold]

I bet you do.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

There's two ways to get to the airport from my house. The one that they tell you in your machine is wrong.

[Christy Lee]

How can it be wrong?

[Bob Kevoian]

Well, you can get there, but there's 3,000 red lights between the two, and I don't want to. So I'm trying to argue with the guys. Got a limited grasp of the English language.

[Chick McGee]

It doesn't always.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, my God.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm so glad I asked.

[Bob Kevoian]

I'm very friendly. I'm very friendly.

[Tom Griswold]

I took a bunch of Ubers in Dallas. You can. I didn't know this. I'd have. I'd have. I've had Uber forever. You can pick conversation.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Amount. And I.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

I put quiet. I put quiet on there. Oh, no, I like to talk. I bet you do. Mind your own business. Tom.

[Chick McGee]

Just.

[Christy Lee]

I always say, how is it going? Are you having a good night or Good evening? Whatever.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, gosh. That just leads them to talk to you.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Mind.

[Tom Griswold]

I always say I think I repeat

[Bob Kevoian]

the destination, but you're glad you're not still living in 80.

[Christy Lee]

I never say that.

[Tom Griswold]

I give them the destination and they go, I'm. I'm a guessing. I'm guessing it's affirmative. And then I have the. I have the map, and you watch my. I watch it until I get to where I'm going. Nobody's hitting me over the head with a bat.

[Chick McGee]

At some point, I always say to them, and by the way, you're welcome. And then they go, what are you talking. You're welcome. I promise you, we did something for you.

[Bob Kevoian]

You know, I wonder.

[Tom Griswold]

I wonder if the old Uber rating went up after being. Being so active.

[Christy Lee]

Rating.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm looking for it right now. I'm not.

[Bob Kevoian]

I was. I was a five. A five out of five, and then I'm a 4.98.

[Chick McGee]

Then you told somebody how to drive to the airport.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, 4.95.

[Bob Kevoian]

Some prick in Chicago couldn't find me, and he blamed me.

[Tom Griswold]

Why am I at 4.95? What did I.

[Christy Lee]

You know what? I am a 4.95. I'm sorry.

[Tom Griswold]

What the hell did I do?

[Christy Lee]

What I do. I was.

[Bob Kevoian]

I can imagine what you did.

[Tom Griswold]

What do you mean?

[Bob Kevoian]

The attitude you exude.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

Light.

[Bob Kevoian]

You don't have to talk to them. We have to. Christy, we need to get to our topic.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, we'll get to it when we come back.

[Bob Kevoian]

Okay, once again, it's. It's tips from Men's Health magazine on how to correctly approach the world of. Of intimacy in an automobile or truck.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, and one of our new features coming up. Is Tom an actual person, or is he an alien trying to be a person? It's another new edition of An Alien on Earth.

[Bob Kevoian]

We are in the O'Reilly O'Reill Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Announcer]

For a complete copy of the Bob and Tom Show Contest rules, go to bobandtom.com contest-rules or just scroll down to the bottom of the page and see contest rules. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. There's Christy Lee at the news desk.

[Christy Lee]

Hello.

[Tom Griswold]

There's Pat guy. Hey, chick in his party shirt. He's just waiting for the party.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

There's Jess Hooker.

[Christy Lee]

Hello.

[Tom Griswold]

There's Josh Arnold. Hi. Hi. There's Ace Cosby. Hello. Hello, indeed. I'm Chick. And hello. Tom. Where are we? What are we doing?

[Bob Kevoian]

Well, we had an interesting survey about intimate activities. Adult intimate activities in. In automobiles, in motion. Yes. Highly dangerous, but.

[Christy Lee]

And young people. We're talking about Undergrads in college.

[Bob Kevoian]

Well, that was where the survey was done. I'm sure there are people of a

[Christy Lee]

certain age doing this.

[Tom Griswold]

Of course.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Bob Kevoian]

Why do you think people buy a Ram truck? Hey, baby. Talking about getting. Talking about getting rear ended.

[Chick McGee]

Or the Chevy V

[Pat Godwin]

by.

[Bob Kevoian]

Other terribly named vehicle. The point is, there's also. I found this article in Men's Health magazine. Nine tips for better car sex.

[Christy Lee]

Being smart about where you park. Number one. Yeah. Be sure to park in an area with privacy. Duh.

[Tom Griswold]

Really?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Oh, you mean. You mean by the Costco gas pump? Saturday morning at noon.

[Christy Lee]

Like the edge of an almost empty parking lot? Or near a campsite site. Laws vary from state to state, but if you get caught in public view, you can be charged with public indecency, lewd conduct, and indecent exposure. A lot of parking lots, however, have security, so be careful. You're going to have to really select a really nice parking lot that's away from everything.

[Bob Kevoian]

There may be cameras on the lamp post.

[Christy Lee]

That's true, too. I don't know if I'd do it in a parking lot. That seems scary.

[Tom Griswold]

I think that's. Yeah, that's. Parking lot's great. Right, Pat?

[Chick McGee]

Perfect.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

In my favorite new song, 20 Cigarettes by Morgan Wallen, they do it off, you know, I'm country road in the back of a pickup truck.

[Christy Lee]

Sure.

[Tom Griswold]

If I'm disgusted by Morgan Wallen or Tom. Now it's a great song.

[Christy Lee]

Plan ahead of time.

[Bob Kevoian]

Oh, come on.

[Christy Lee]

This is great. Pack a car sex bag.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, no.

[Christy Lee]

What would you put in your car sex bag?

[Bob Kevoian]

What is it?

[Ali Breen]

This is this.

[Tom Griswold]

Like, if you're a librarian, I'm gonna say lotions. Emollients. I'm gonna say, let's see.

[Christy Lee]

Condoms. Yes.

[Jessica Alman]

Wipes.

[Christy Lee]

Wipes, yes.

[Bob Kevoian]

But don't put the roofies in there. They might find them.

[Christy Lee]

Sex toy.

[Bob Kevoian]

Where do you put those.

[Chick McGee]

Those. Those booties you put over your shoes so you don't get scuff marks on them?

[Tom Griswold]

There you go.

[Christy Lee]

An absorbent. This is my favorite. An absorbent sex blanket. Everybody has one of those, right?

[Pat Godwin]

You gotta have a sex blanket.

[Tom Griswold]

What? This is absorbent.

[Chick McGee]

Put my ASB in the.

[Tom Griswold]

Find the cs.

[Bob Kevoian]

You have to wonder, is this one of those things where they had to write an article? They said to one of the interns, think of some stuff. You gotta fill some space here.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, here's a helpful hint. Do not leave lube or condoms in your car for extended periods of time, since they can melt.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, sure.

[Tom Griswold]

Then you just got a mess.

[Bob Kevoian]

So you don't hang them by the booties in the mirror there. The booties by the dice. Hey, look, I got my Trojan extra long. See them, honey?

[Tom Griswold]

They did used to put baby booties around rear view mirror, didn't they? Is that still a thing? No, I don't think it.

[Bob Kevoian]

Is the dice still a thing?

[Christy Lee]

Did you put your high school graduation floor tassel in there? That was a big thing.

[Jessica Alman]

Oh, God. This morning in my town, it was drive anything but your car to school day for seniors. And so it was tractors, dirt bikes.

[Tom Griswold]

No way.

[Jessica Alman]

Four wheelers, golf carts. And it just. It was chaos. I have a. I live in a very small town.

[Chick McGee]

That's fun.

[Jessica Alman]

It was.

[Bob Kevoian]

That's great.

[Jessica Alman]

Yeah, it was, but it was raining and there were parents and teachers I know. That were stuck behind. Find these kids on their golf carts.

[Chick McGee]

Jess, did you have a lei hanging from your.

[Jessica Alman]

I didn't, but that was the first thing.

[Chick McGee]

That was a basic move.

[Pat Godwin]

That was.

[Jessica Alman]

That was a big BB move. Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Explain this to me.

[Jessica Alman]

But it usually had a scent. Like girls would spray their perfume on it and then put it around.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, really?

[Jessica Alman]

Their rear view mirror?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

It's like those plastic.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Was it some kind of a. Was this like having the flamingo or the banana.

[Jessica Alman]

No, it didn't mean anything.

[Chick McGee]

It was just a. It was like having the dice.

[Bob Kevoian]

It wasn't a code meaning round. Round heeled, easy to go.

[Chick McGee]

No, no. Cars weren't around when round heel was being used.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah. That's just horse. That's when you put a layer on your horse.

[Chick McGee]

Ernie Pyle was the last person to

[Bob Kevoian]

say, hey, speaking of how weird, how

[Tom Griswold]

strange Tom is, we have a new episode of Alien on Earth.

[Christy Lee]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

Starring Tom Griswold. Time now for the alien who just discovered things here on.

[Christy Lee]

On Earth.

[Bob Kevoian]

I got a new toilet brush. It's pretty amazing.

[Tom Griswold]

This has been the alien who just discovered things here on Earth. I miss that. I miss you getting a new toilet brush. Tell me all about it.

[Bob Kevoian]

There's new technology, is that right?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm trying to think how you would.

[Bob Kevoian]

You know, the brushes, they come with that cup.

[Tom Griswold]

Sure.

[Bob Kevoian]

And then you've got the brush that's sort of like a globular thing.

[Tom Griswold]

It's a toilet brush caddy, if you will.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, Very good. Now, there's a thing that sticks up.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Bob Kevoian]

So in other words, imagine you've got like a softball with a pencil sticking up.

[Tom Griswold]

Right. All right. And then you put the toilet brush on. On the.

[Bob Kevoian]

Here's the. Here's the bottom of the brush, this thing goes up like that and it. So you can get the top underside of that.

[Chick McGee]

It's not new. It's not new at all.

[Bob Kevoian]

It was developed in 2025. Campus of Stanford.

[Jessica Alman]

I'm shocked you don't use the disposable clean cleaners. That's what I use. I don't have a toilet brush. I just use the.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, the clip on deals.

[Tom Griswold]

The wand.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, yeah, the wand's pretty good.

[Tom Griswold]

The wand and the puck.

[Ali Breen]

I love it.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, the cleaning puck.

[Bob Kevoian]

This is new to me.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, you can't.

[Bob Kevoian]

I got to be careful because every once in a while the dogs will drink out of the toilet. So you don't want to have any cat.

[Tom Griswold]

Now I have a toilet plunger caddy. It comes with. And you put it. And the doors close on it.

[Bob Kevoian]

Oh yeah.

[Chick McGee]

It's nice.

[Christy Lee]

My toilet brush does that. The closes.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't have a toilet brush. I have the wand and the cleaning

[Bob Kevoian]

pot and yesterday we had toilet brushes or toilet it plungers in the news and a world record.

[Christy Lee]

Oh God.

[Bob Kevoian]

Where the guy.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, let's relive that. Can we relive that? No.

[Christy Lee]

I thought we were talking about better cars.

[Bob Kevoian]

We were. Sorry.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm sorry.

[Christy Lee]

Number three, use the limited space to your advantage. Avoid the driver's seat where you can honk the horn or nudge the gear shift.

[Chick McGee]

You sure can't honk the horn.

[Bob Kevoian]

You have. You have to wonder if this is the last thing that somebody did. If, if, if they were, you know, in the. In the front seat and the driver's seat side or whatever and they popped it into neutral and they went into a lake and maybe Mary. Mary Joe Capec. Need the whole bunch.

[Christy Lee]

The front passenger seats. Young girl with the future and parents election either.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, yeah. I, I got drunk and did it.

[Chick McGee]

That's not what we're suggesting.

[Christy Lee]

Instead, opt for the back seat.

[Tom Griswold]

What a horrible horror.

[Christy Lee]

But move the front seats up as far as they will go so you have more space.

[Bob Kevoian]

So now you're talking. It's essentially a Chinese fire drill. To get this going, you've got to get out of it. Car, move the seats. Get your. What is it? Your sex bag.

[Tom Griswold]

By this time your csb.

[Bob Kevoian]

The cops have arrived.

[Chick McGee]

All the spontaneity is gone.

[Christy Lee]

Right.

[Jessica Alman]

But this must be people that just want to do it in the car.

[Chick McGee]

Right?

[Jessica Alman]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Like Pat. Pat is always prepared.

[Jessica Alman]

Do you like it when it's busy? Like if you're in a busy area?

[Pat Godwin]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

And they might be able to see You. No, not that.

[Chick McGee]

You guys remember. It was a book by J.G. ballard. And then Cronenberg made the movie Crash.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

About people who are turned on by being in car crash.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, ye.

[Ali Breen]

Oh.

[Chick McGee]

It's very troubling.

[Tom Griswold]

That's a thing.

[Bob Kevoian]

I have only been to a drive in movie once.

[Chick McGee]

Really?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, once.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, once.

[Christy Lee]

That explains a lot.

[Bob Kevoian]

High school. I did. I.

[Christy Lee]

You hate it.

[Tom Griswold]

I know.

[Christy Lee]

You hate everything about it.

[Bob Kevoian]

I don't like eating in my car.

[Christy Lee]

You're not going to expose your kids to one of the greatest things in life. I'm shocked. You hate. You like everything old.

[Chick McGee]

Right.

[Christy Lee]

Yet you don't like drive in movies. And you won't take your kids to

[Bob Kevoian]

a drive because I like to go to a movie theater.

[Tom Griswold]

Where this is where your kids also know that you.

[Chick McGee]

You can sit outside of your car.

[Christy Lee]

Chairs and stuff, blankets in.

[Bob Kevoian]

I can sit in a movie theater with a roof.

[Christy Lee]

But you can.

[Bob Kevoian]

You can sound.

[Christy Lee]

Put the suv.

[Bob Kevoian]

Could I get to. I have a question.

[Tom Griswold]

Just think how fun the girls. You get their pajamas on. They get in the car. You're driving to the drive in. Absolutely.

[Bob Kevoian]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

All right.

[Bob Kevoian]

My question is.

[Tom Griswold]

Just trying to help.

[Bob Kevoian]

I could send. I could send them to the concession stand and then move the car. That'd be funny.

[Jessica Alman]

Oh, my dad used to do that to us all the time.

[Bob Kevoian]

Great.

[Jessica Alman]

Send us into the grocery store and then park somewhere else.

[Pat Godwin]

That's a good game.

[Bob Kevoian]

These are. No, my point is, do. Is there a lot of intimate activity at a drive in theater?

[Chick McGee]

It's one of the world's oldest, oldest teenage tropes.

[Jessica Alman]

You've not seen Greece?

[Pat Godwin]

God, that's a big one.

[Bob Kevoian]

I. I couldn't sit through Greece. It was so awful. You? The movie? Yeah. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, terrible. The newspaper. Greece.

[Bob Kevoian]

We'll get. We'll get back to our topic. We have some other exciting things coming up in the world of news. A couple of sad things I gotta tell you.

[Tom Griswold]

No, it's not the saddest thing you've ever heard.

[Bob Kevoian]

No, no.

[Chick McGee]

And we'll also come back with a text from my mom, who knows I'm at work.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

I love these.

[Chick McGee]

I love these.

[Tom Griswold]

My favorite thing.

[Christy Lee]

Does she go, what are you doing, honey?

[Chick McGee]

I'll read it when we get back.

[Bob Kevoian]

And when. And when we come back, we do have the. The. The death of a great beer in America. Oh, I think it's been a while.

[Tom Griswold]

It's been around a while.

[Chick McGee]

This is a name we'll know.

[Bob Kevoian]

Absolutely.

[Tom Griswold]

I did not care for that beer.

[Jessica Alman]

The first beer I ever stole.

[Tom Griswold]

No kidding. There you go.

[Bob Kevoian]

And you didn't want to talk about it.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

I want to tell you real quick about money, money, money, money. I mentioned yesterday I put, I put gas in a vehicle and I got charged 200 bucks. It's unbelievable. Money can be real tight right now, of course. And this is, this is where American financing comes in. If you own your own home and you're thinking, wow, I just saw my neighbor sell his or her house and they sure got a lot of money for it. You don't have to sell your house to take advantage of that because most houses are worth a lot more than they used to be, especially in the last few years. So you may have a lot of equity in that house. Maybe a good time to consider refinancing that house, taking some of that cash and using it for whatever, for some bills, maybe build a nice deck, maybe a garage, whatever it might be. It's up to you and it's up to you to figure out what I'm talking about by going to American Finance. American financing is known as America's home for home loans. And what the folks do there is there are no upfront fees, by the way, zero pressure. But in about 10 minutes, they can tell you if maybe the equity in your house could be, could be something you could take advantage of right now, given the current economic situation. So give them a call at 866-889-2611. Or just remember this, American financing.net they have a thing right now where they may be able to delay two mortgage payments and they say their average client. Right. Right now, just the average one saving about 800 bucks a month on that mortgage payment. So see if this is something that could work for you. Once again, visit americanfinancing.net NMLS 182334 nmlsconsumeraccess.org APR for rates in the five started 6.327% for well qualified borrowers. Call 866-889-2611 for details about credit costs and terms. Visit american financing.net bobandtom Average savings based on borrowers who save over $200.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom show. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts studios. Think O'Reilly Auto Parts for all your car care needs, get the parts and service you need fast. From the professional parts people at O'Reilly Auto Parts, there's Christy Lee.

[Christy Lee]

Hello.

[Tom Griswold]

At the news desk, there's Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hey, chick.

[Tom Griswold]

At the music desk, there's Jess Hooker. Hi. There's Josh Arnold. Hi.

[Chick McGee]

With a text from my mother.

[Tom Griswold]

There's Ace Cosby.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, Chick.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, man. I'm Chick. And hello, Tom.

[Bob Kevoian]

So your mom knows you're doing this right now? She knows you're busy.

[Chick McGee]

She knows my hours for sure. Yes. Yeah. And occasionally she listens. Sometimes she doesn't. And I get it. I probably say things that embarrass her to the core. Sure. Well, she texted me this. Gabby. That is her pug. All right? Gabby doesn't like Jeff, who went back to. To college. Sherry kept barking at the TV while he was on lol. And then the next text is a sweating emoji.

[Jessica Alman]

What?

[Chick McGee]

Like the sweat coming up your corner.

[Jessica Alman]

So I. I might need to know who these people are.

[Chick McGee]

Me too.

[Tom Griswold]

Jeff going back to college.

[Chick McGee]

My guess is Oscar.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Oh, okay.

[Chick McGee]

Now that we're looking at this more carefully.

[Christy Lee]

So she's watching.

[Chick McGee]

So the pug must be watching on tv. Yeah, I don't know who Sherry is. I don't either, but she kept barking at the tv.

[Christy Lee]

So maybe she doesn't have a dog named Sherry.

[Jeff Oskay]

Not that I'm aware.

[Bob Kevoian]

So is Sherry the neighbor's dog?

[Chick McGee]

I will ask.

[Bob Kevoian]

Or the neighbor?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, but all this. So anyway. Okay, this is starting to make sense. I'm. My mom's dog, does not care for Jeff.

[Jeff Oskay]

Oscar.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, that's a shame.

[Bob Kevoian]

Maybe. Maybe the beard. Maybe the beard throwing off. Okay, those were solid jokes. I enjoyed it very much.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, they were good jokes.

[Jessica Alman]

Moms do just enter conversation like. Yeah, you're mid conversation before the conversation started with a mom.

[Chick McGee]

Right.

[Jessica Alman]

I talked to my mom for two hours and 45 minutes yesterday.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah?

[Jessica Alman]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Christy Lee]

We.

[Jessica Alman]

Yeah, we covered all of it.

[Chick McGee]

Did she.

[Bob Kevoian]

Did she jump or did she say.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, who has that kind of time, man?

[Tom Griswold]

We did.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, I do.

[Christy Lee]

That's crazy.

[Jessica Alman]

Yeah, I have lots.

[Christy Lee]

Did you. Did you hug at the end?

[Jessica Alman]

No, we were on the phone.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah. So you could.

[Bob Kevoian]

So you could do other things.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Jessica Alman]

Like I'm folding laundry.

[Chick McGee]

Three lasagnas.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Okay, now we're talking. Now we have to. Have we finished off the tips? No, we're on Intimacy in a Vehicle. Oh, my gosh.

[Christy Lee]

We're only on number four. Play around with positions. Positions like missionary partner on top, cowgirl, lotus, and prone bone. What the hell does that mean?

[Chick McGee]

When you're prone, you're lying on your back.

[Christy Lee]

Maybe easier to pull off, focus on small movements and grinding.

[Tom Griswold]

Wonderful.

[Chick McGee]

I am with the grinding.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but I think we know the grinding.

[Chick McGee]

No, but here's the thing. The old, you know, the up and

[Tom Griswold]

down,

[Chick McGee]

you know, sometimes the grinding is better.

[Pat Godwin]

Much better.

[Bob Kevoian]

Is that right?

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Bob Kevoian]

Are you gonna confuse with grinder?

[Chick McGee]

I'm not.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. And that of course it's regional. It's a sandwich.

[Chick McGee]

It's a sandwich.

[Tom Griswold]

And.

[Chick McGee]

Or the gay app.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Jessica Alman]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

So Tom got two jokes for one.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know why he's laughing so uncontrollably. Guessing it's because you would rather eat a sandwich.

[Chick McGee]

You know, Christy, they're not insulting because look who they're coming from. Well, actually it's like being insulted when

[Bob Kevoian]

you said you prefer when you prefer a grinder. Well, you know, to each. To each his own. I didn't even say I prefer a grinder. That's exactly what you said.

[Chick McGee]

The grinding.

[Tom Griswold]

Exactly what you said.

[Bob Kevoian]

Oh, I'm sorry. He doesn't sandwich. Okay. Sorry.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, you should really listen to the show. Yeah, it's pretty good.

[Christy Lee]

We continue with nine tips for better car sex. Number five, get loud.

[Pat Godwin]

Get loud.

[Christy Lee]

If you live in a shared space.

[Bob Kevoian]

I thought you're trying to not get

[Tom Griswold]

caught by the police.

[Chick McGee]

Well, let's hear what this.

[Christy Lee]

If you live in a shared space, this may be your opportunity to make some noise. Research has shown that being loud during sex can help you connect with your partner. Release some pent up energy.

[Ali Breen]

Practice.

[Tom Griswold]

Really enjoying this.

[Christy Lee]

Practice breath control and keep your blood circulating. Sophie.

[Bob Kevoian]

You like it. Like you're. You're harassing an umpire. Little League game. Hey, come on.

[Christy Lee]

Blue. Number six, create a playlist. The car's built in surround sound. Makes it a perfect environment for a curated sex playlist. All right, then your battery dies. You can't get in.

[Chick McGee]

I like listening to recordings of me having sex in a prior occasion and

[Tom Griswold]

try to catch up to the exact moment.

[Christy Lee]

Number seven, keep some of your clothes on.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, that can be real hot.

[Christy Lee]

Since someone can walk by. Or you might need to make a quick exit. You may want to avoid stripping down entire clothes.

[Chick McGee]

Plus, it's a good excuse when you can't get her bra off. After two minutes, you go, hey, you know what would be us is if we kept some folks off. That always turns me off.

[Jessica Alman]

All, we are coming into sundress season.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

What does that mean? What does that mean in terms of the bra?

[Christy Lee]

I don't. You could just lift your skirt up. Yeah.

[Jessica Alman]

You don't have any unders on.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, but, but do you have. Do you have a bra?

[Jessica Alman]

No.

[Christy Lee]

Sometimes

[Tom Griswold]

I believe they. They have special bras for sundresses. Don't they?

[Christy Lee]

I think they're kind. Some are built in.

[Tom Griswold]

It's awesome. Right into the sundress.

[Bob Kevoian]

So the notion is easy access from below, I believe.

[Jessica Alman]

Right?

[Tom Griswold]

Sure.

[Chick McGee]

I knew that with the sundress.

[Bob Kevoian]

I didn't know about that way when the cops trying to flash light in, she can drop. Drop everything right down. She's fine. By the way, Officer, you're there trying on her brassier.

[Chick McGee]

If you're really trying to see something, you're going to need a minor though.

[Christy Lee]

Number eight, Try different types of sex. Oh, car sex doesn't always have to include full intimacy.

[Pat Godwin]

This doesn't.

[Chick McGee]

I didn't care for this when I. Because I saw this list earlier and I tried some of these things.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

And the car sex. I tried different kinds of sex. I didn't care for gay sex.

[Tom Griswold]

You didn't like that one?

[Chick McGee]

I mean, maybe if I had been giving.

[Tom Griswold]

But now, you know, they're.

[Christy Lee]

They're talking about dry humping here. Can make for a sensual car experience.

[Tom Griswold]

There you go, freak. Here's your dry humping. How you like that?

[Christy Lee]

You can even channel a nostalgic feel with a makeout session.

[Chick McGee]

That's real fun.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. And then, of course, except that your

[Chick McGee]

breath smells like Sonic because you just.

[Jessica Alman]

You guys, I keep having these makeout dreams. I told Josh and Pat about this the other day and I had one about Jay Leno.

[Chick McGee]

Hilarious. That's the one we really enjoyed.

[Jessica Alman]

And I couldn't get to his mouth because his chin kept like pushing me away.

[Tom Griswold]

All right.

[Jessica Alman]

And then I had one with John

[Tom Griswold]

Candy two nights ago.

[Chick McGee]

Wow, nice.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

You like comedians?

[Jessica Alman]

I guess.

[Christy Lee]

And finally, to wrap this up, remember the aftercare?

[Chick McGee]

What does that mean?

[Christy Lee]

Well, being intentional about the steps you take post sex can help you better connect and wind down with your partner.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, is this where you give the girl a fake name and then you

[Chick McGee]

get out of there? Yeah, it was a trust.

[Christy Lee]

After cleaning up, you can even go for a drive while you talk about what you liked and maybe some of the things you would like to improve the next time.

[Bob Kevoian]

Here's. Here's a. Here's a fiver for when you get in the bus. They may sell snacks.

[Chick McGee]

This is.

[Tom Griswold]

This is the worst one of these we've ever.

[Christy Lee]

I know.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

Written by amateurs.

[Chick McGee]

Drive around and talk about what you liked and what you would like to be improved.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. Now I have. I have. I have a couple notes here.

[Chick McGee]

Can you imagine?

[Tom Griswold]

Are you kidding me?

[Jessica Alman]

Not outside of a car. I can't imagine.

[Christy Lee]

Have you ever tried that?

[Bob Kevoian]

By the way, I have. I have questions.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Bob Kevoian]

Are you supposed to open the sunroof?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, that's a good question.

[Tom Griswold]

I think that's probably.

[Christy Lee]

Why wouldn't you?

[Tom Griswold]

Up to you, I would think. I don't know.

[Bob Kevoian]

Maybe.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Would it be nice? It might be kind of nice.

[Christy Lee]

Your legs are hanging out of the.

[Bob Kevoian]

I was gonna say, yeah, there might be. If it's a small vehicle.

[Chick McGee]

No way outside.

[Tom Griswold]

What if you're sitting under a tree and you've opened the sunroof and a bird doodoos on your back, do you

[Chick McGee]

stop or does she look at you and go, now you know how it feels.

[Tom Griswold]

Because I would think it would be

[Chick McGee]

warm right from the bird.

[Tom Griswold]

Tom, your thoughts? Okay.

[Chick McGee]

Well, you're not for it, are you? Any cars?

[Bob Kevoian]

Get a hotel room, for God's sake.

[Chick McGee]

Get a hotel room, for God's sake.

[Tom Griswold]

But he hates hotels.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Why are you in the room? Get out. Enjoy life.

[Bob Kevoian]

No, no, no, I love. I like the hotel for certain things. I just don't like to eat in my hotel room.

[Tom Griswold]

No.

[Chick McGee]

Well, I feel bad for it.

[Christy Lee]

I do, too.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't see you being a big eater there, Tom.

[Bob Kevoian]

You know, do you say anything about, like, getting. How about at least cleaning the car?

[Christy Lee]

What do you mean, cleaning the car? You have your absorbable blanket, I think.

[Tom Griswold]

And I know you would be more sad, satisfied with the sex, but I think you'd be equally excited. You'd be able to wash your car and have it detailed.

[Chick McGee]

And as. As Christy just reminded us, the list did say have a, quote, absorbent sex blanket.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Bob Kevoian]

I'm just envisioning Josh. Josh with some lady in the car, and all of a sudden, a bag of French fries from Sonic spills on her lap.

[Pat Godwin]

You think there's French fries?

[Christy Lee]

Such a boy. Holy.

[Bob Kevoian]

Oh, no. Some of the fries slip under.

[Tom Griswold]

Stare them down, Josh.

[Bob Kevoian]

Slip under the seats.

[Jessica Alman]

Stick with it, Josh.

[Chick McGee]

And by the way, I know you think I didn't hear you.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

I wrote back. Okay, so the original text said, gabby doesn't like Jeff, who went back to college. My mom's dog doesn't like Oscar.

[Christy Lee]

Right.

[Chick McGee]

Sherry kept barking at the TV while he was on. All right. Gabby kept barking. I have no idea who the hell Sherry is. My mom. I have a stupid smartphone. She said.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, all right.

[Christy Lee]

How.

[Chick McGee]

How Griswoldian. Not my mom's fault. No.

[Bob Kevoian]

Very good.

[Tom Griswold]

Wonderful.

[Bob Kevoian]

I understand that entirely.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Time now for an obituary. In the world of beer, this is.

[Tom Griswold]

When is the official end date? Or has it happened.

[Bob Kevoian]

It's on. It's in the story Here. Christy, you got it over there.

[Christy Lee]

Schlitz Beer is beginning. Schlitz Beer is ending production.

[Chick McGee]

Well, she said every bit of shorts, didn't she?

[Bob Kevoian]

You said shorts. We get that. We have it on tape.

[Tom Griswold]

She can't talk.

[Bob Kevoian]

It's a Schlitz.

[Tom Griswold]

Don't, don't. She's really sensitive.

[Bob Kevoian]

When you were a kid, didn't you find just the name Schlitz hilarious?

[Chick McGee]

Yes, everybody did. It rhymes with hilarious things.

[Bob Kevoian]

Well, Schlitz happens.

[Christy Lee]

They're ending production after 175 years. Pabst Brewing Company said it's ending the production of Schlitz, which began as Milwaukee's Tavern Brewery and was America's largest brewer. The company, founded in 1849, was bought by Pabst in 1999.

[Bob Kevoian]

Oh.

[Christy Lee]

To send the Milwaukee icon off, Kirby Nelson with Wisconsin Brewing Company will brew a final 80 barrel batch of Schlitz on May 23rd at its Verona brewery. Pre orders for the final Schlitz will open on the same day. The beer will be available on June 27, when Wisconsin Brewing Company will hold a public event that celebrates the brand Schlitz beer.

[Tom Griswold]

The most iconic and enduring slogan of Schlitz, the beer that made Milwaukee famous.

[Chick McGee]

No kidding. I've never had a Schlitzer.

[Tom Griswold]

Then you had when you're out of

[Pat Godwin]

Schlage Schlitz, you're out of beer.

[Tom Griswold]

Go for the gusto.

[Christy Lee]

Yep.

[Tom Griswold]

That was Schlitz.

[Christy Lee]

Wasn't that on a sailboat or something to go for the Gusto commercial? They were on a boat.

[Bob Kevoian]

I don't remember.

[Chick McGee]

Back when they used to sponsor regattas.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, I remember. Was it James Coburn, Schlitz Light?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, that's a great spokesperson for beer.

[Bob Kevoian]

They did a famous. It's considered to be one of the biggest flops in beer advertising.

[Chick McGee]

No kidding.

[Bob Kevoian]

It was this real hostile ad.

[Chick McGee]

Or remember that's how you want your Coburn.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

But it was like it was sort of the message, drink Schlitz Light or else. But I knew it fizzled. I don't recall Schlitz as being a very tasty brew.

[Jessica Alman]

I thought it was good.

[Chick McGee]

I was always aware of it. Never had it.

[Jessica Alman]

It's like a. It's a good ballpark beer.

[Chick McGee]

And you said, this was the first

[Jessica Alman]

beer that I ever stole.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

In what capacity? Was it a 40? Was it a.

[Jessica Alman]

No, it was. I, I think someone like my. Someone had gifted my dad. Like there was a six pack that had sat in the garage frid A very long time. And I was like, well, this is fair game.

[Bob Kevoian]

Right?

[Tom Griswold]

Right.

[Jessica Alman]

Yeah. And so, yeah, took it. Smoked cigars.

[Bob Kevoian]

Did you? Said, when you're out of Schlitz, you're out of beer.

[Tom Griswold]

Out of Schlitz, you're out of beer. Go for the gusto.

[Bob Kevoian]

And they were the beer that made Milwaukee famous.

[Chick McGee]

Wow. I've got to go get one before they go away.

[Jessica Alman]

There is a pizza place around the corner. We could go get one there on tap.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Sounds good.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Okay. Well, we have a couple of trips. Tributes. Oh, why don't. We haven't heard this one in a while. This is a beer similar to Schlitz.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, no. Have you. Have you checked this?

[Chick McGee]

Don't. Don't bother.

[Bob Kevoian]

Here.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Jeff Oskay]

Hello.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you, everyone. That's what I thought it was my beer commercial. Oh, yeah. Thank you. Are we ready to start? Musicians, singers. I'm standing by. Yeah. Let's take it from the top.

[Chick McGee]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

Cue the announcer. Hello, Americans.

[Bob Kevoian]

Here comes the newest beer imported from Germany.

[Tom Griswold]

Fear. It's hot, hot, hot. The girls say gee, that hits the spot. Sunlight, buzz. Some like Schlitz but for me it's Clitz 999. It's not Clitz. It's just Clyte, like my name. Hans Clyte K, L, I, T, Z. Yeah. Let's size this again, okay. Clemsitize. Okay.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Mr. Nelson, man, you're very. Okay, let's try this Frenzy top. Hello, Americans. It's the small, hard to find beer

[Bob Kevoian]

Klits for an ice cold beer it's

[Tom Griswold]

hot, hot, hot the girls say, gee, that hits the spot for romance on those special nights it's Clit Doom comes. Listen, listen. It's Clydes. Clydes, not Clitz. Cut the music. Listen, listen. Let me just do it myself. I'll sing it for you, okay? I'll show you how it's done. From the top. All nights cold beers at heart, Heart, heart The girls say some like bar, some like Schlitz but for me it's Klitz no, no, it's Clyte. No. Now you get me doing it.

[Christy Lee]

Damn it.

[Tom Griswold]

Kleitz Ruden Kuntz Germany. Look for Kleitz in the box.

[Bob Kevoian]

Featuring the famous horses, the Kleitsdales.

[Tom Griswold]

Morons don't call. I'm surrounded by.

[Bob Kevoian]

I always like the Kleitsdales, the Clydesdale. Thank you very much. So no more Schlitz beer?

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow. So sad.

[Chick McGee]

I love pbr, though, so.

[J]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Paps does a do. Does do. A good product.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, man. I like Beer tasting beer.

[Jessica Alman]

Me too.

[Tom Griswold]

Berry beer.

[Jessica Alman]

Budweiser. Just a Budweiser. Straight.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

If I'm gonna drink Bud, it's. I'm going Budweiser.

[Jeff Oskay]

I like your.

[Bob Kevoian]

I like your slogan idea.

[Pat Godwin]

I did too.

[Chick McGee]

I.

[Bob Kevoian]

That was good. Yeah. I like a beer tasting beer.

[Chick McGee]

I do.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

I can see a guy doing that commercial.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Gets off his horse. You know something? I like a beer tasting beer. Not to mention a Marlboro cigarette. What do you mean we can't talk about this in the radio? Go to hell. Who are you bossing around here?

[Chick McGee]

Can we talk about the Trojan condom I'm wearing?

[Bob Kevoian]

I leave it on all day just in case. Oh, I'm sorry.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Bob Kevoian]

You have something over there?

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, I do. Simply safety. Do it yourself. Home security system. We chose Simplisafe for the Bob and Tom studio. Comprehensive protection sensors, cameras, 247 monitoring. I have it going on at the compound of my wonderful little compound. You can easily customize a system that's right for your home. And it's not just a camera. It's a comprehensive ecosystem. Sensors, cameras for inside and out. 247 professional monitoring in the event of a break in or fire or flood simply saves. Agents are ready to take action. And affordable pricing. About 24. 7 monitoring for a fraction of what the traditional brands charge. Named America's best customer service by Newsweek magazine. And over 5 million people trust SimpliSafe. Every day you can experience the same peace of mind we do here at the Bob and Tom show and I do at my compound. Which is why we've partnered with Simplisafe to get you folks this deal. Bob and Tom listeners only get 50% off your new system. Just visit simplisafetom.com that's half [e-mail]. there's no safe like simply safe.

[Bob Kevoian]

Thank you very much. We have coming up, an interesting adventure in a cyber truck. Also we, for the second time, second day in a row, Pizza Hut. Some interesting news about Pizza Hut.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, the Hut.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, we have. We have a CCCP rocket News.

[Chick McGee]

What's that?

[Bob Kevoian]

That's Russia. That's the Russian version of USSR rocket. Oh, ccc. Those cool jackets. CCCP for genuine commies. I'm surprised you don't have one. These are the O'Reilly Auto Part Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Announcer]

Hey, thanks for listening this morning. Got something to say? Send us an email. Bob and Tom. Bob and Tom dot com.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios at the news desk. It's Chris. Christy Lee.

[Christy Lee]

Hi.

[Tom Griswold]

There's Pat Godwin.

[Pat Godwin]

Hello.

[Tom Griswold]

There's Josh Arnold.

[Chick McGee]

Hi there.

[Tom Griswold]

Ace Cosby's here. Hey, I'm Chick McGee. Hello. Hello. Tom.

[Bob Kevoian]

Time now to educate the public with a little bit of a history lesson.

[Tom Griswold]

May 20th.

[Bob Kevoian]

Maybe you didn't like history when you were a kid.

[Christy Lee]

I didn't.

[Bob Kevoian]

Oh, it's great.

[Christy Lee]

Now I love it.

[Bob Kevoian]

And. And we're gonna teach a little something. Christy.

[Christy Lee]

Okay, good.

[Bob Kevoian]

You know, Jacob Davis was.

[Christy Lee]

I do not.

[Tom Griswold]

Big Jake Davis.

[Bob Kevoian]

He and his partner created Levi's.

[Chick McGee]

Oh.

[Christy Lee]

Oh. He doesn't get much credit, does he?

[Chick McGee]

Strauss and.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, Levi. Levi Strauss gets all the credit.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. They don't have. We don't have any Jacobs on the state of Jacobs.

[Tom Griswold]

1873, they would be called Jakes, right?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Oh, dude, those Jakes look great.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, they should do an off brand and off. Some sort of.

[Bob Kevoian]

That's a great idea.

[Christy Lee]

Jakes and Levi's.

[Tom Griswold]

A new line called Jake's.

[Bob Kevoian]

That's a terrific idea. 1873, they were patented. The story is riveting.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, good.

[Bob Kevoian]

Because James, did you know this? This. I'm kidding there. But that was in 1873. The next week. Yeah, we'll have this next week in today in history. The first business did. Casual Friday.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, how about that?

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, you don't have to wear your khakis. We got these Levis you can wear.

[Chick McGee]

Check this out.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, you have a favorite pair of jeans you wear?

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, I do. I got ones I'm.

[Christy Lee]

I'm wearing right now.

[Bob Kevoian]

I do.

[Christy Lee]

Do you have Levi's button up?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah. Probably my favorite. I'm not wearing them now, but yeah,

[Bob Kevoian]

I certainly have a favorite pair of jeans. Doesn't everybody?

[Tom Griswold]

I would think.

[Christy Lee]

Remember when you had to buy jeans before they were pre washed and you'd have to. They'd be like stiff as a board. Do you remember that?

[Bob Kevoian]

Oh, yeah, sure. I wash jeans over and over and over again and very hard hot water.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

In hot water.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

You buy them 8 sizes bigger so they.

[Tom Griswold]

But isn't there. Isn't there the school of thought? You shouldn't, you should never, almost never wash them.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah. And they put them in the freezer and then whatever.

[Tom Griswold]

I think that's. I think, I think that's right.

[Bob Kevoian]

Now, how about this? 1927, Charles Lindbergh takes off from New York City in the Spirit of St. Louis.

[Christy Lee]

Sure.

[Bob Kevoian]

For the first non stop flight across the Atlantic Ocean to Paris.

[Christy Lee]

Is that where he landed?

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah. Very dangerous.

[Christy Lee]

Of course. Especially since. Was he the one that can't see out the windshield? You have to look out.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, the gas tank was.

[Christy Lee]

That was crazy.

[Chick McGee]

Yes, that is crazy.

[Tom Griswold]

He had three separate families or something. Something about Lindbergh.

[Bob Kevoian]

He had a couple extra kids out there.

[Tom Griswold]

American Nazi Party.

[Bob Kevoian]

He.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah, look it up.

[Bob Kevoian]

Presumably when he landed, I was thinking about this. He had to have a. Probably the one of the first people to pee out of an airplane.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, you think he peed out

[Bob Kevoian]

or just into a jar?

[Tom Griswold]

Wouldn't the fuselage.

[Bob Kevoian]

I don't know. Yeah. Now, interesting enough, on this date in 1932. 1932, Amelia Earhart leaves Newfoundland to become the first woman to fly solo and non stop across the Atlantic. And I assume she left from Newfoundland because it's kind of like the women's tease when you play golf, right? Shorter. And I don't have it in front of me. If I'm not mistaken, didn't she have to land in Ireland because it was. I think she had a problem. I'm not kidding. I'll have to look it up.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't think the planes were pressurized.

[Bob Kevoian]

Had to be freezing.

[Tom Griswold]

So if he would urinate, he'd probably just, you know, urinate in the plane and dribble out a hole or something, I would think.

[Bob Kevoian]

Okay. Now, let's see. BBC bands. The song A Day in the Life by the Beatles on This date in 1960. 67.

[Chick McGee]

What was the troublesome lyric?

[Pat Godwin]

Turn, Turn me on.

[Bob Kevoian]

That part.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow, I'd love to.

[Pat Godwin]

Turn me turn you on.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

And amazingly enough, as soon as they did that, that stopped all problems they had with drugs.

[Chick McGee]

Isn't that nice?

[Bob Kevoian]

It's just. Yeah, that was really good.

[Chick McGee]

I love Day in the Life.

[Christy Lee]

Good song.

[Bob Kevoian]

ELTON JOHN In 1979, in this date, became the first Western pop star to tour the ussr.

[Chick McGee]

Huh?

[Bob Kevoian]

You know that, don't you?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Back in the ussr he had a live album or something.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah. Changed some of the lyrics. Like Sputnik Man.

[Chick McGee]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

I see what you're doing.

[Bob Kevoian]

Ivan and the Jets. I thought that was tasteless. When he turned it into Hold Me Closer, Commie Dancer.

[Chick McGee]

And then he was barely trying when he did Candle in the Winski.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, yeah. Come on, dude, don't go taking my borscht, lazy. Really, I just.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, don't go digging my borsch.

[Bob Kevoian]

Pandering to. And according to the Kremlin, that was the last time a homosexual was anywhere in Moscow.

[Chick McGee]

That's right.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah. They eradicated them all. They are not a happy bunch Lighten up their Kremlin Ace. On this date in 1980, Peter Chris quit the band Kiss. Not a smart move, Peter. They put another guy in makeup and replaced him.

[Chick McGee]

Who was it?

[Tom Griswold]

Vinnie Vincent or something, I think.

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

Was that the cat man?

[Bob Kevoian]

He had. And in his defense, Peter Chris had medical problems. His doctor, Dr. Love, that's what he called. Yeah, yeah. He was the cat.

[Tom Griswold]

Josh the cat.

[Bob Kevoian]

Oh, birthdays. Everybody can do an impression of this guy back in the day. Anyway, Jimmy Stewart.

[Chick McGee]

Thank you. It's my birthday.

[Tom Griswold]

I'll last all that moon for you.

[Bob Kevoian]

But that's very good.

[Tom Griswold]

Very good.

[Chick McGee]

He would go on the Tonight show and do poems he written. He'd written, Right?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Pretty good horse.

[Bob Kevoian]

This is interesting. Do you know who this guy is? William Hewlett, born in this state in 1913.

[Tom Griswold]

Him and Billy Packard came up with Hewlett Packard. Am I right?

[Bob Kevoian]

That's right.

[Christy Lee]

That's what I was gonna.

[Tom Griswold]

Honest to God. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

I was gonna catch that.

[Tom Griswold]

I was lying.

[Chick McGee]

Now, before Hewlett Packer Packard, of course, worked with Reginald Fudge.

[Tom Griswold]

Of course. Right.

[Chick McGee]

And their company, Fudge Packard, they decided

[Tom Griswold]

there's something falling out wrong with this.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah. It is considered. This is kind of funny. The. This was quite literally done in a. In Silicon Valley. This is considered like the first, you know, garage company, whatever, out of Silicon Valley.

[Tom Griswold]

Hewlett Packard.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Huh.

[Bob Kevoian]

And so Apple stole that, huh?

[Chick McGee]

No.

[Christy Lee]

They started in the garage too, didn't they?

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah. Famously, the Steves.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Hewlett, of course. Famous songwriter.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, here we go.

[Bob Kevoian]

He let the dogs out.

[Tom Griswold]

Here we go.

[Chick McGee]

You let the dogs out.

[Bob Kevoian]

Love that song.

[Chick McGee]

He loves it.

[Tom Griswold]

That's barely worth the word.

[Bob Kevoian]

Happy birthday, Jack Gavor.

[Tom Griswold]

Is he dead?

[Bob Kevoian]

He did, yes.

[Chick McGee]

And I think he went naturally.

[Bob Kevoian]

Died of natural causes. He was famous. For those of you unfamiliar with him, he. They called him Dr. Death.

[Christy Lee]

Assisted suicide. Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

For the right to. For the terminally ill to die. It's kind of a sad.

[Chick McGee]

Started international conversation about.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, yeah. Also born in this state, another famous Armenian American, Sherilyn Sark.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, share.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah. Cher. So it's nice we had a. Someone who's associated with death and the right. Nice, pleasant share. Famous for what? Famous for her pro bono work.

[Christy Lee]

She didn't kill Sonny.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, she didn't.

[Chick McGee]

She told him to go.

[Tom Griswold]

She didn't exactly help anything. Okay.

[Chick McGee]

She buttered the skis.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Joe Cocker was born in the state of 1944. The great singer.

[Chick McGee]

I love him.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

One of the. One of the only people, if not the only person to take a Beatles song and make it better.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, that's true. There.

[Tom Griswold]

It's.

[Bob Kevoian]

There are very few.

[Chick McGee]

You disagree, Pat?

[Pat Godwin]

I don't like that.

[Bob Kevoian]

You don't like.

[Pat Godwin]

Everybody likes it. I know you guys all love it. I don't care.

[Bob Kevoian]

A little help from my friends. Yeah. Oh, come on. And he's saying the song you liked from the movie, right? Love Lift Us Up where we belong.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Up where we belong. Yeah, I know. I mean that's not. Not my favorite, but it works for that.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Milu.

[Bob Kevoian]

He's. He's British by the way.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, not. Not.

[Bob Kevoian]

He's Minim Cocker.

[Chick McGee]

He's not a.

[Bob Kevoian]

Not a spaniel. Oh no, he isn't.

[Tom Griswold]

What? I don't think a span.

[Christy Lee]

Is this Spaniel.

[Tom Griswold]

Spaniel from Spain.

[Christy Lee]

Spaniard.

[Tom Griswold]

You just don't care anymore.

[Chick McGee]

Simply. It's not that he doesn't. We've gone from. I don't care if people. People listen to. I don't want people.

[Tom Griswold]

He's active.

[Bob Kevoian]

You know. He played high. He played high school football.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, Joe Cocker. This will be worth it.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, he played the front line like you chick. He was a cocker blocker.

[Christy Lee]

A what?

[Chick McGee]

A conquer blocker.

[Bob Kevoian]

How about this one?

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know.

[Bob Kevoian]

Okay, this guy's name is really unfortunate. Not born in 1944. Dietrich Machitz.

[Chick McGee]

Or he may not we never know. So we always have pads M A

[Bob Kevoian]

T E S C H I T Z.

[Chick McGee]

Now what did this guy do?

[Bob Kevoian]

He's the guy that invented Red Bull.

[Chick McGee]

Oh really?

[Bob Kevoian]

I'm a billionaire.

[Tom Griswold]

Huh?

[Bob Kevoian]

Dietrich, mate. Shits. Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

That can't be how you behave yourself.

[Bob Kevoian]

How would you pronounce S C H I T Z?

[Chick McGee]

Well, shites.

[Bob Kevoian]

You think?

[Chick McGee]

No, I have no idea. I'm with you. I is funny,

[Bob Kevoian]

but I believe he. I believe he got his wings a couple years ago. No longer.

[Tom Griswold]

Man, I'm sure. I'm glad this is the practice show and this is going out.

[Pat Godwin]

Can you imagine if Baylor show.

[Chick McGee]

Wait a second. What? It's going out?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

So long. Goodbye, Mr. Matt. Well, thank you very much. We're going to come right back.

[Chick McGee]

We are. You may not.

[Bob Kevoian]

Pj. Pj.

[Tom Griswold]

Chris.

[Christy Lee]

Christy.

[Chick McGee]

Pj.

[Christy Lee]

I look like.

[Chick McGee]

I insist we put a side by side photo of PJ and Christy Lee

[Tom Griswold]

and put it up. And you can. You yourself can decide.

[Chick McGee]

Let me explain it to the listeners. It's like having Farah Fawcett next to a photo of Ernest Borden and Tom confused.

[Tom Griswold]

I know.

[Christy Lee]

I forgot to put makeup on Today because I left it at home. But my goodness, people working on posters too long.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know what, no, what year it was when I asked you to do this, but I, I, I can't stress strongly enough. Please get some help. Please, please, dear God, get some help.

[Christy Lee]

Why were you thinking about pj?

[Bob Kevoian]

I was reading another thing that I of someone I'm not going to read, so.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, okay.

[Tom Griswold]

You know that, that helps, too, when you're reading three things at once. Is it PJ Souls saying something else on the air? No, no, no, we're good.

[Bob Kevoian]

We're good.

[Chick McGee]

Did you make love to PJ Souls Chick who' Cute. She was cute.

[Christy Lee]

She was so cute.

[Chick McGee]

So she is J. Sol.

[Christy Lee]

She was in stripes.

[Tom Griswold]

She had no choice but to get to age because she's an old soul. Thank you. I thought I was, I thought I was trying to take. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

We'll be back.

[Bob Kevoian]

Coming up, we have a pizza news. Yeah, we have.

[Tom Griswold]

Tom will not be here.

[Bob Kevoian]

Similarly, we have have a famous restaurant is closing down.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, Schlitz restaurant.

[Bob Kevoian]

We got Schlitz beer going away. And a famous restaurant in Las Vegas is calling it quits. We'll find out what it is. From the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios, this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Announcer]

Hey, thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom show this morning. Get a look at today's show on our YouTube channel.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. There's Christy Lee at the news desk.

[Christy Lee]

Hi.

[Tom Griswold]

Hi there.

[Christy Lee]

Rough in here today.

[Tom Griswold]

It's been.

[Chick McGee]

Shut up, lady.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, there's, there's Pat Godwin.

[Bob Kevoian]

Hello.

[Tom Griswold]

There's Jess. She's back. Hey, there she is. Mama. Big Mama. Jessica, I didn't mean to say big.

[Chick McGee]

What a.

[J]

That's okay.

[Bob Kevoian]

I'll take it.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, like Big Mama, like the Shelly Winters movie.

[Chick McGee]

Right. And we're not about to say you look like Shelly Winters.

[Tom Griswold]

I think.

[Bob Kevoian]

Did you get, get, get a size 12 foot race?

[Tom Griswold]

There's Josh Arnold. Did I say that? There's Ace Cosby. Hello, I'm Chick and hello. Hello.

[Bob Kevoian]

Tom, a couple quick things of Congratulations, Jessica. I'm the baby.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Thank you.

[Tom Griswold]

Got your little girl.

[Christy Lee]

I do.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you bring her in?

[J]

I didn't. I figured she might start crying.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, we got plenty of people to hold a baby.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, no, we've got plenty of people crying the day.

[Christy Lee]

Okay. Yeah, there's that.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Well, now, congrats on the baby. And do you have a nickname for her?

[J]

I always Call her Vivi.

[Christy Lee]

Vivi.

[Bob Kevoian]

Viv. What's, what's her, what's her official name?

[J]

Vivian means a whole name.

[Bob Kevoian]

Like Vivian Marika or something. What is it?

[J]

Vivian Myrie.

[Chick McGee]

Myrie.

[J]

Myrie.

[Bob Kevoian]

Is that a family name?

[J]

No, we combined, well, kind of. We combined Mary and Marie into Scottish version of Mary.

[Bob Kevoian]

Oh, wait a second. This is a perfect setup for some kind of a joke. Combining. Combining two names.

[Chick McGee]

What?

[Bob Kevoian]

Tom, what names could they have combined? That wouldn't have worked out well.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, oh, okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Connie and Tina.

[Christy Lee]

It's a beautiful name.

[J]

Thank you.

[Tom Griswold]

Tallulah and how old now?

[J]

She's 11 weeks today.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, let me see here. So that's about eight months.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. It's about six feet tall, kid.

[Bob Kevoian]

Okay.

[J]

She's very long too. It's insane.

[Chick McGee]

A long baby.

[J]

But she was stuck in there and didn't want to come out. So no one was even close to the birth date. When you were doing the guesses came like in March instead of February.

[Bob Kevoian]

But they got her out though.

[J]

Yeah, they vacuumed her out.

[Chick McGee]

Do you remember?

[Tom Griswold]

Or you should have called her Hoover or something.

[Chick McGee]

You. I, I saw you like a week after she was born. Do you remember this? Because you were so. You were like delusional.

[J]

Yeah, I was on no sleep and, and basically no iron. Like I had a lot of blood loss and they tried to give me an iron transfusion and I was allergic to it.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, Tom. She lost a lot of blood.

[Chick McGee]

How'd you like to be allergic to blood?

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, Just chewed on nails, huh? Well, congrats. And we're gonna move forward here. I wanna remind everybody the pop up shop is back up. Go to bobandtom.com. we've got some cool new stuff. Stuff there. Might want to check that out. Now we also have some. We had some sad news from the world of beer. I guess it's sad. Schlitz beer, the beer that made Milwaukee famous. Well, let's go away, let the consumer

[Tom Griswold]

sort it out, you know.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, sure, sure.

[Tom Griswold]

What are you gonna do?

[Christy Lee]

Sadly, beer sales are down everywhere.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

I'm trying to think of, slogan wise if this were a category in jeopardy. The beer to have when you're having more than one is Schaefer, right?

[Christy Lee]

Shaffer. No.

[Bob Kevoian]

Is the one beer to have when you're having.

[Christy Lee]

Is that an Ohio thing?

[Tom Griswold]

And then hams, the beer refresh.

[Bob Kevoian]

Hams, the beer refresher.

[Tom Griswold]

They never did take a Schlitz. They never did that.

[Bob Kevoian]

Probably not. No, no or no or no Schlitz.

[Chick McGee]

No. Schlitz. Schlerlock.

[Tom Griswold]

There you go.

[Christy Lee]

The problem is Maker, had you heard of Schaer beer before?

[Chick McGee]

I had. Yeah. I never had it.

[Christy Lee]

I didn't know if that was.

[Chick McGee]

Did you guys hear of a Falstaff?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

But it's interesting to me. The ones you remember, the jingle hams, the Bear Refreshing hams, had kind of a pseudo Native American bear.

[Tom Griswold]

I think he was a Native American bear.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Kind of insulting.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, boy.

[Bob Kevoian]

No, I. I'm not advocating that they do that.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm just.

[Bob Kevoian]

Sounds like you are stating the obvious.

[Christy Lee]

Miller High Life. The champagne of bottled beers. I remember that.

[Bob Kevoian]

They still. They still have that when it's time to relax.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Mike, one beer stands clear year after year.

[Bob Kevoian]

What were Schlitz's other slogans?

[Tom Griswold]

Go for the gusto. The beer that made Milwaukee famous. Take a Schlitz.

[Bob Kevoian]

When I was a kid, I. I believed that that was the beer that made Milwaukee famous.

[Chick McGee]

You don't know Schlitz from Shinola?

[Bob Kevoian]

Shinola, now a very fine watchmaker.

[Chick McGee]

Just having fun, not trying to be bored.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't want to talk about

[Bob Kevoian]

it. Don't want any facts. But also in. In the. In the realm of things that are no longer around. Christy Lee. No, no, no, no.

[Chick McGee]

That's.

[Bob Kevoian]

No, you're around.

[Christy Lee]

First you call me pj now you said I'm dead.

[Pat Godwin]

No, no.

[Tom Griswold]

This.

[Bob Kevoian]

The story about.

[Tom Griswold]

Hi, Ms. Christy. It's all almost like I can hear

[Christy Lee]

there's another death.

[Bob Kevoian]

It was a nuanced segue.

[Chick McGee]

I see newswomen.

[Christy Lee]

Greg Hyman, the co. Creator of Tickle Me elmo, passed away. Mr. Hyman's partner, Deborah Nelson, confirmed his death at the age of 78 years old.

[Bob Kevoian]

I thought we were going for the other story. Not this one. This. I feel bad now.

[Tom Griswold]

What other story?

[Christy Lee]

What other story?

[Bob Kevoian]

About the restaurant that's closed.

[Christy Lee]

Well, that's not a death. This is a death.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, it's a death of a restaurant.

[Chick McGee]

One of Arthur Miller's lesser plays.

[Bob Kevoian]

You know what killed that play? Is when they. When they brought up the giant big boy statue. Watch this chick.

[Christy Lee]

This will solve all the problems in the morning when you hand me the news. Just put it in the order. You want me to read it from now on, and then we won't have this problem.

[Tom Griswold]

Get a little static over here at the news desk, Tom, what do you got?

[Bob Kevoian]

This guy's name.

[Tom Griswold]

You don't let her talk to you like that.

[Bob Kevoian]

This is our second day. Of a guy named Hyman in the news.

[Christy Lee]

Who was it yesterday?

[Bob Kevoian]

The guy from the Ramones.

[Chick McGee]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

Still not the guy that his real

[Bob Kevoian]

name was Hyman started this.

[Tom Griswold]

The seafood restaurant in Charleston. Still not that Hyman.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, the Hyman's. They're a good family. They love us.

[Bob Kevoian]

Oh, now the Hyman's. This is a guy that was a toy inventor.

[Christy Lee]

Yes, he made Tickle Me Elmo.

[Chick McGee]

You ever gotten the calamari at Hyman's? It's all bulky. It's all kind of red.

[Bob Kevoian]

Ripped.

[Tom Griswold]

Is that right? They call it ripped.

[Christy Lee]

Thanks.

[Bob Kevoian]

His. Does it say like the show?

[Chick McGee]

They like that show.

[Bob Kevoian]

Does it say the other things he invented?

[Christy Lee]

Yes, it does. Thank you.

[Chick McGee]

So he not only Tickled Me Elmo, but he also had other things.

[Christy Lee]

He made a talking barney.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, he did. Okay.

[Chick McGee]

Did he have Finger Me Grover?

[Bob Kevoian]

He had the very, very, very unsuccessful. Unsuccessful. You hit like a Percy.

[Chick McGee]

Percy. Who was Percy?

[Tom Griswold]

Is that like Thomas the Tank Engines Percy? I think one of one of the trains is called Percy.

[Bob Kevoian]

I think rather effeminate doll. It didn't.

[Christy Lee]

Me and his co creator did come up with some other prototypes before they decided on Tickle Me Elmo.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, really?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. I'm not making. This is really bad timing. The giggling monkey called Tickles the chimp.

[Chick McGee]

Tickles.

[Pat Godwin]

Is that serious?

[Bob Kevoian]

Wonderful. Ended Tickle.

[Tom Griswold]

Now this. Tickle Me T. Does toy monkey have both hands?

[Christy Lee]

Tickle Me Taz. Based on Looney Tunes cartoon character.

[Bob Kevoian]

He did a secret office back rub. Dilbert.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yes. Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

That led to some very interesting lawsuits.

[Christy Lee]

Secret office background, an executive at Tao that finally suggested Elmo for the tickle technology. The resulting toy, of course, course released in the summer of 1996 and became an immediate sensation.

[Bob Kevoian]

A lot of tough questions about consent evolved from Tickle Me Elmo. Particularly with the cast of 30 Something

[Tom Griswold]

Boy.

[Chick McGee]

How'd you connect those two?

[Tom Griswold]

That is unfortunate.

[Bob Kevoian]

That is a stretch. Well worth stretching for if you know the facts.

[Chick McGee]

I don't think bus felt had anything to do with it.

[Tom Griswold]

No, of course.

[Bob Kevoian]

Poor guy's getting screwed.

[Christy Lee]

Hey, here's the story you wanted. The famous Heart Attack Grill in Las Vegas is shutting down after 15 years.

[Chick McGee]

I was not aware of the Heart Attack Grill. I like the idea.

[Christy Lee]

It served free meals. Josh. To patrons over £350.

[J]

Oh, wow.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, geez. It's like one of those places that you can drink for free all night if you turn in your AA shit. Just burn those places down.

[Christy Lee]

The establishment announced that it will not be renewing its long term lease, citing the reality that major casinos have intentionally priced the average person out of the quintessential American experience. Of affordable indulgence.

[Chick McGee]

They kind of have. I mean, can you even get the 399prime rib at any of those Vegas joints?

[Tom Griswold]

That must be.

[Chick McGee]

That must be because that was such a thing.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

It added that they're proud of their 21 year impact on America's waistline. The restaurant became known for its hospital theme. We talked about this when they opened.

[Bob Kevoian]

I totally.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Waitresses dressed as nurses paddle spanking guests who didn't finish their food.

[Chick McGee]

What?

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

It was kind of. Kind of the gag.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

The new place. CPRs should do pretty well. They'll take care of you. You got to weigh 350 for a free steak. Really?

[Tom Griswold]

So how do they do they weigh

[Christy Lee]

you when you walk in?

[Tom Griswold]

Is it on the honor system or

[Bob Kevoian]

there's a. I probably have a scale.

[J]

I mean, you can't ask someone. I mean, if someone says you're 350, you can't question it.

[Christy Lee]

Right.

[J]

Just like a girl says they're 110 and they're obviously like 180, you can't question it.

[Tom Griswold]

So 350. Oh, really?

[Chick McGee]

You're 110?

[Ali Breen]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

So my license says, how much is your upper halfway? I don't date much.

[Tom Griswold]

Girls don't like.

[Bob Kevoian]

Coming up, it's going to be sexy time with Ali Breen. But first, it's time to check in with Christy Lee. And the love of her life is, well, of course her husband. Of course she's got her kids. But then right there in the top five. Is that Hyundai.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, My Tucson Hybrid. I do love it. America's best warranty, Even when she was

[Bob Kevoian]

alive, that scored more than a mom.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, good old Christie. Y. Bless her heart.

[Christy Lee]

Sometimes I wish I was. Never mind. No. Thank you, Mr. Griswold. I will continue. Now, the Tucson Hybrid comes with America's best warranty. It also has the latest in technology. And all of the hybrids from Hyundai are so safe to drive, they're ranked right up there at the top of the charts. And if you'd like to go off roading, you might want to check out the Santa Fe hybrid. Because even though it's a hybrid, it has plenty of power to navigate wherever you want to take it. Toughest terrain, they wink at that. Hybrids from Hyundai. Visit HyundaiUSA.com or call 563-144-603 for all of the details. That's Hyundai. Hybrids get great, great gas mileage.

[Bob Kevoian]

Look for those hybrids at the Indy 500 this weekend. Ladies and gentlemen, special edition of our show coming up that day you can listen to that by grabbing the iHeartRadio app. I'll tell you more about that coming up. We're gonna come back with Allie Breen and Sexy Time. These are the O'Reilly Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tonight Tom Show.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, welcome back to the Bob and Tom Show. We're in the O'Reilly Auto Part Studios. Christy Lee is at the news desk.

[Christy Lee]

I just pulled a muscle.

[Tom Griswold]

Pat Godwin. Jessica Alman is here.

[J]

Hi.

[Tom Griswold]

There's Josh Arnold.

[Chick McGee]

Hi there.

[Tom Griswold]

Ace Cosby. Hello, I'm Chick. Hello. Hello, Tom.

[Bob Kevoian]

Hello. Chick McGee.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Time to check in. I think we're going to be speaking with Ali Breen. Excuse me.

[Chick McGee]

You know what that is, Christy? That's Radio hall of Famer

[Tom Griswold]

in the studio.

[Christy Lee]

Yes. And nobody knows he's working today.

[Pat Godwin]

Bedtime reminder.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

And wait a second. On the big screen, we've got Tuesday Weld in

[Chick McGee]

a gorgeous actress from.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, you have. You have a real. A real, like, 60s beach movie look going today. Ally Breen.

[Ali Breen]

Yeah, I have kind of a beachy shirt on and I'm in Florida, so maybe that accounts for it.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, nice.

[Christy Lee]

It makes sense.

[Bob Kevoian]

And are you standing in front of

[Tom Griswold]

a just, like, interrogation wall?

[Ali Breen]

Yeah, pretty much. No. Yeah, just a regular Airbnb again. This stuff, turns out, is a lot of work.

[Bob Kevoian]

You look great. You look very, very suntan. Like you ever seen the movie. Ever seen the movie where the Boys Are?

[Ali Breen]

No.

[Bob Kevoian]

Oh, it's a classic.

[Chick McGee]

No reason you should have.

[Bob Kevoian]

It's. It's a wonderful movie.

[Ali Breen]

But I like the name Tuesday, though. Is that what you said her name was?

[Bob Kevoian]

Tuesday Weld. Okay. Her best movie probably is. What? Anybody.

[Christy Lee]

I have no idea. She was.

[Bob Kevoian]

She was on the Dobie Gillis TV show.

[Tom Griswold]

My God. I think. Anything from this century. Sorry. Anything at all.

[Bob Kevoian]

I'm sorry. It's just that beach look that she has reminded me of Tuesday. Well, now, the way the show works is people write letters to Ally Breen at A L L I B R E E N on your favorite social media platform. And Ali reads them to us. We try to help people with their love troubles. What have we got, Allie?

[Ali Breen]

We kill it. Dear Allie, my boyfriend just turned 40, and after we have sex, he can have sex again. Right after away. I made the mistake of acting like I'm impressed by this. So we do it all the time. But honestly, who wants to have sex twice in a row? It's a new relationship. So I was being too enthusiastic to begin with, and now I don't know how to get Real. Any advice?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, just tell them.

[J]

Yeah, I want to savor it.

[Bob Kevoian]

By the way, by the way, we have a letter from him. And? And we emailed him back, said, why are you writing us? He goes, I'm telling everybody.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, yes.

[Ali Breen]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

The classic. I don't know.

[Ali Breen]

Yeah, she can be impressed without wanting to have sex again. She can be like, that's amazing.

[Chick McGee]

But honestly, you can easily just say when he tries to start doing it again, just go, oh, you know what? I'm sorry, we need to wait until later. You know, anything.

[J]

Yeah, you did me good the first time. I'm done.

[Chick McGee]

I am, right?

[Ali Breen]

I'm so satisfied. I'm not. Yeah. Plate of his ego.

[Bob Kevoian]

Maybe offer to make him a sandwich.

[Chick McGee]

I mean, you could distract him with food.

[Tom Griswold]

Act like you heard something in the back backyard.

[Chick McGee]

You could also tell him that that second time really loosens her bowels.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. God knows what might happen.

[Bob Kevoian]

Of course your doctor ordered you to.

[Chick McGee]

Who knows what might happen?

[J]

How can he constantly just keep going, though?

[Tom Griswold]

Man, I remember those days.

[Chick McGee]

Sure, you would have almost no refractory period.

[Christy Lee]

Are you serious?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, it's fantastic.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, I like that word, refractory.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, that's what.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, that's the recovery time.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Bob Kevoian]

I've got a joke. I can't.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, let's move on.

[Bob Kevoian]

I just thought of a really funny.

[Christy Lee]

Allie, do you have another letter from.

[Bob Kevoian]

Oh, sorry.

[Ali Breen]

Yes, Allie, I do. Dear Allie, I'm divorced and me and my wife have two kids, so we still live together, but just sleep in different rooms. It's been going really well and I just started dating somebody and she knows my situation, but now just decided she wants to meet my wife to make sure I'm not lying about this. Is that reasonable? It's only our second month dating, so I thought I'd wait a while for that. What should I do here?

[Chick McGee]

It's reasonable. Reasonable now, I mean, check with your ex wife.

[Christy Lee]

Now, I don't know if she's gonna really enjoy that, but. Yeah, yeah, that. That situation always works until somebody starts dating.

[J]

Yeah, someone's using excuse on her before, like. No, no, no, my wife's cool with this. My ex wife.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, you're exactly right. She has, because this guy's giving her no reason not to trust.

[J]

Right, you're telling the truth, but.

[Chick McGee]

Which is unfair for her not to just automatically trust this guy because of something that happened in her past. But you can also.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, after.

[Bob Kevoian]

After you introduce them, then, you know, take her to the next room and give her a good solid Rogering.

[Chick McGee]

Right.

[Bob Kevoian]

Real loud.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, that'll help.

[Chick McGee]

You enjoying this?

[Tom Griswold]

Ex wife get a little of this?

[Chick McGee]

Do you hear her? No, you don't. That's why we got divorced, isn't it? If you would shut up.

[Christy Lee]

Have you ever known a couple that kept the marital home and they move in and out every. Every week?

[Bob Kevoian]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

Like. And then they have like an apartment or a condo or whatever, and they will move back and forth week to week.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, so it's like the. Honey, it's your turn in the comments.

[Ali Breen]

Right. So the kids never have to move.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, right.

[Chick McGee]

I'm also amicable. Divorce is. I just love hearing about it.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, it does happen.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

My parents now, the one. The one that you know, do they have. Do they have the same apartment? Yes, they switch. That's weird.

[Christy Lee]

Same condo.

[Bob Kevoian]

Okay, that's interesting. Yeah. The guy that I know that did that, she had her apartment, he had his apartment, but they had the house together that they kept.

[Christy Lee]

I know people like that.

[Bob Kevoian]

That's a kind of a financial strain.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, whatever works. Yeah. Boy.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, that.

[Ali Breen]

Yeah. You could look at it as an investment. Maybe the apartments are going up in value. Maybe they bought condos and a house or something.

[Bob Kevoian]

If they're sharing. If they're sharing the same apartment, then there's a lot that you could have a lot of. Of really awkward stuff going on.

[Christy Lee]

Well, you could have separate bedrooms.

[Bob Kevoian]

Hey, by the way, that. That new chair really isn't for sitting.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, boy.

[Chick McGee]

Right, Right.

[Bob Kevoian]

You might want to wipe that down.

[Chick McGee]

You know, I saw you put a fern in that. That isn't a planter.

[Ali Breen]

Don't open the top drawer, whatever you do.

[Bob Kevoian]

Ally, are you. Are you on your way to London again?

[Ali Breen]

Yes, I'm going on Friday to London.

[Bob Kevoian]

All right. And where's. Are you playing? Is it the. Is it. What is it called? The top.

[Ali Breen]

Yeah. I'll be at Top Secret again. I'm not sure what day.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Ali Breen]

But I will. Yeah. Post it.

[Bob Kevoian]

Okay.

[Ali Breen]

Although once again, they do tend to let us know everything very last minute.

[Chick McGee]

Well, it's top secret, isn't it?

[Ali Breen]

Yeah, exactly.

[Bob Kevoian]

Now let's get to our next letter from Ali Breen, please.

[Ali Breen]

Dear Allie, over the last several months, when my wife does the laundry, she folds her own stuff and leaves me to fold mine and the kids. A couple weeks ago, I washed and folded all of this stuff. And she had several pairs of her standard cotton underwear and one pair of black silky ones that I've never seen. Upon further investigation, I found a pair of lacy, completely see through Underwear that I've also never seen. We haven't had sex in a year. Should I be concerned she's wearing these for someone else?

[Chick McGee]

There's a strong chance. And ladies, please let me know if I'm wrong on this. She's wearing them totally for herself.

[J]

I mean, maybe they go with a

[Tom Griswold]

certain outfit that I. I would agree on that. Other than they haven't had sex in a year.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Christy Lee]

And the see through pants. That's kind of got to me too, because I don't have any see through underwear.

[J]

They're not comfy.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. The black silky ones I can see if you're wearing because there's like maybe a certain fabric that would stick or whatever.

[Chick McGee]

Right.

[Christy Lee]

That the see through underwear makes me a little.

[Chick McGee]

But she kind of knows that he's doing the laundry. Would she be that crazy?

[Ali Breen]

Her own stuff? She was folding her own stuff. So I think it was a surprise that he did all of it. It sounds like. Well, that's a big chance to take, though, if you're right.

[Tom Griswold]

Cheating.

[Bob Kevoian]

A more mundane issue on the same topic. Don't you hate it when you open up the washing machine and there's stuff in it? Stuff in there.

[Tom Griswold]

What do you mean?

[Chick McGee]

Well, the washing machine particularly.

[Bob Kevoian]

And then you. Then you go, okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, you're saying someone does a wash and don't.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah. Do I put this in the dryer?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, because you don't know what's in there that needs to be hang.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, I've learned that lesson.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[J]

As long as you ask.

[Bob Kevoian]

I've ruined a lot. What if they're not there?

[J]

Well, then you're stuck with.

[Bob Kevoian]

Now, back in the day when I lived in an apartment, you would just

[Christy Lee]

stick it on top of the dryer.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah. You take the wet stuff out, put it on top of the thing and put your own stuff in. Yeah, but.

[Ali Breen]

Right.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah. That's a much more mundane issue that we can't solve that problem either.

[Ali Breen]

No, but it is a weird situation that she's only folding her stuff and leaves him to do his.

[Bob Kevoian]

And the kids, they're done.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Get out.

[J]

Sounds like she's punishing him. Like, you need to do some chores around here, dude.

[Ali Breen]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't think she cares what he finds at this point. So.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah. Yeah, they're done.

[Ali Breen]

A.

[Bob Kevoian]

Get your things together.

[Tom Griswold]

Time to lower you up.

[Christy Lee]

All right,

[Bob Kevoian]

let's move on. Ally, what else you got?

[Ali Breen]

Dear Ally, my best friend's husband just got caught cheating. And it turns out my husband knew what was going on. I said, why wouldn't you tell me? He said cuz he didn't think he should get involved. But that's crazy. That's not getting involved. That's telling your wife who you're supposed to tell everything to. Right? No, I wouldn't have told my friend that. I wouldn't have gotten involved either. But I'm mad that he didn't trust me enough to tell me.

[Chick McGee]

No, it's not a trust thing. He didn't want anything to do with this drama.

[Tom Griswold]

He was trying to distance himself.

[Chick McGee]

Forgive. Don't. Don't.

[J]

He did the right thing. But I'm on your side. I would want to know too. I would hate to be left out. Like, how dare you not share that info with me?

[Chick McGee]

I know this seems like a very womanly argument. It does. Like most women would be sold.

[Christy Lee]

Mad women love the tea, my friend.

[Ali Breen]

I agree with Jess. Yeah. I'd be like, don't we tell each other everything? It doesn't mean we're going to tell the person. Right.

[Chick McGee]

You're all impossible.

[Bob Kevoian]

Next. Let's get to our next letter.

[Tom Griswold]

That's the best lover you'll ever have.

[Christy Lee]

Then talk back.

[Tom Griswold]

That's right. Your right hand. Okay. If you're left Al.

[Ali Breen]

My husband usually does boy's night once a week at his friend's house. But his friend's girlfriend just moved in and so now they go out. Apparently they've been going to Hooters, which when I found out, I told him that's the same as going to a strip club. He said, I'm crazy.

[Tom Griswold]

She's obviously never been to a strip club.

[Ali Breen]

He said I'm crazy and I'm overreacting. But am I? What do you guys.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

The best thing this guy can do is take her to Hooters and she'll see that it's damn close to a strip club.

[Tom Griswold]

Attaboy.

[Christy Lee]

Boys will be boys. Let it go. It's no big deal.

[Tom Griswold]

Jeez.

[Bob Kevoian]

Ellie, have you ever been to a Hooters?

[Ali Breen]

Yeah, in la. I used to go in Vegas. There was one. They had really good wings.

[Christy Lee]

They do have good wings. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

My issue with Hooters, the last few times I went was some of those girls, their boobs were too small. You can't work here. You cannot work here.

[Pat Godwin]

Called what?

[Tom Griswold]

Hooters?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. I'm not eating at ironing boards, I'm eating at Hooters.

[Bob Kevoian]

A legal issue.

[Chick McGee]

Legally, they should be allowed to say, we are simply not hiring the small boobed. Now, I'm not saying there's no place

[Bob Kevoian]

what if there was a special room? It's like remember back in the day, you'd get smoking or non smoking. You could walk in and say, I'd like. I prefer the flat channel. Interested women.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, well, you're the first person to ever ask for that.

[Christy Lee]

And follow me.

[Bob Kevoian]

That's the ironing board room, I believe you call it.

[Chick McGee]

I'm not. I don't have any problem with small boobed women. I just have a problem with them working at Hooters.

[J]

What if she has a great butt with the orange shorts and the pantyhose?

[Bob Kevoian]

All right. Josh is just pissed because they wouldn't let him work at Dick's Sporting Goods.

[Chick McGee]

That's right. They said, sir, you can work at Kendall's,

[Tom Griswold]

you're welcome at Ken's.

[Chick McGee]

Right.

[Bob Kevoian]

No. Going to Hooters, I don't think is that big of a deal.

[Jessica Alman]

It is.

[Chick McGee]

It is not.

[Bob Kevoian]

I haven't been cartoonish since we broadcast from there 10 years ago. Whatever.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, it's not. It's really not a big deal.

[Tom Griswold]

That was the broadcast I thought would never end.

[Bob Kevoian]

Ali Breen is our guest. Ali Breen is a fine stand up comedian. She travels the world constantly. We can't figure out how or why. She's usually painting an Airbnb or something and she'll be over in London, England. Are you gonna be. You said you're going this Friday.

[Ali Breen]

I'm going this Friday. Yeah. For a little over a week. So I'll be there for a bit.

[Bob Kevoian]

We have time for one more letter, Ally.

[Ali Breen]

Dear Allie, my boyfriend and I broke up because he cheated and we ended up getting back together years later. Whenever we're in a fight, of course it comes up and he says, it's so long ago, I need to just get over it. I said, he's acting like it's not part of our history. And he said he's apologized enough and he's done a apologizing for it. So what? You don't have to be sorry anymore. If a certain amount of years pass

[Chick McGee]

by, I'm starting to have a panic attack.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, my gosh.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, boy.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, my God.

[Chick McGee]

This is every relationship ever.

[Ali Breen]

Yeah.

[J]

If a few years have been in

[Ali Breen]

between though, he did that, so of course it's going to come up all the time. Right. He's wrong.

[Christy Lee]

Well, it's only coming up because you put it up.

[Bob Kevoian]

I believe the the line line is you'd take the garbage out for her now followed by referencing it.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

You have to let it. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Christy, you don't believe That I do believe inherently as a woman. You agree with her?

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Chick McGee]

I all share this same insanity.

[J]

If they stayed together and didn't break up, she can bring it up as much as she wants, I think. But since they separated for a few years. Let it go. You guys both did stuff in between.

[Bob Kevoian]

Again. You're also lying, Josh. I believe it's the collective unconscious. Yes. Which I know. Is it Nietzsche or Kevin?

[Tom Griswold]

You're exactly right.

[Bob Kevoian]

The logical positive is some phony philosopher. But it's true.

[Christy Lee]

Forget about it.

[J]

Maybe he shouldn't have cheated.

[Christy Lee]

Well, there you go.

[Ali Breen]

Gender is not in the argument.

[Chick McGee]

Gender is not based on whether or not you have a penis or vagina. It's based on whether or not you agree with this woman or you don't. That's the number one.

[Ali Breen]

Wait, wait. Let me ask you a question though. So if your girlfriend had cheated, you don't think you would bring that up every time you guys got into a fight?

[Chick McGee]

If I decided to stay with her, I would. Absolutely. There would have to be 100% forgiveness in that. Absolutely. And I would not do that. I know that's very hard for a woman to understand.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, hard to unring that bell. Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Well, thanks very much, Ally. Have a great time in in the uk.

[Ali Breen]

Thank you. I'll be talking to you guys from there next time.

[Bob Kevoian]

Okay, Great.

[Chick McGee]

Have fun. Be safe.

[Tom Griswold]

No bloody now.

[Bob Kevoian]

You're going to be safe at home, aren't you?

[Tom Griswold]

I am in my compound with simply safe. The design it yourself, do it yourself home security system. I have it at the compound. We have it here in the Baba Tom studios. Easily customize the system that's right for your [e-mail] an app guided setup. No drilling required. You can install and arm your system in under an hour. What's this tell you? I did it in around a half an hour. No need to wait around for that mysterious technician and that fantasy of the two hour window. It's not just a camera. It is comprehensive ecosystem. Sensors and cameras are inside and out. And 247 professional monitoring. SimpliSafe's agents are ready to take action. And with no long term contracts, it's simply Simplisafe. They keep you safe with fine customer service and performance. Not by trapping you in a contract. Customer first. The Newsweek magazine said Simplisafe has America's best customer service and 24. 7 monitoring for a fraction of what the traditional brands charge. And you can experience the same peace of mind. Bob and Tom studios and my compound. We all do. And this is a discount for Bob and Tom show listeners only right now. Now get 50% off your new system with SimpliSafe. Just visit simplisafetom.com that's half off@simply safe tom.com. there is no safe like simply safe.

[Bob Kevoian]

Thank you very much. Coming up, Pizza Hut News again for the second day in a row, kind of a cool story out of Pizza Hut. And also a salad you're not going to want. You'll find out what kind of salad.

[Chick McGee]

This. This Alley segment just pisses you off. I cannot. It's no good for me and my views on relationships because right now I'm sitting here going, marriage isn't about love. It's about how much you're willing to put up with God.

[Bob Kevoian]

So you'd like more letters saying, dear Ally, everything is great in my life.

[Chick McGee]

Can we get one of those per segment?

[Bob Kevoian]

We could have Christy Raiden every week.

[Christy Lee]

I can. I'm very happy at home. We have a wonderful relationship.

[Bob Kevoian]

Relationship.

[Tom Griswold]

There's something going on over there.

[Christy Lee]

Me and you immediately jump to that.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Nobody's allowed to be happy here.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, no.

[Bob Kevoian]

So we're gonna come back with happy news.

[Tom Griswold]

All right.

[Ali Breen]

Okay.

[Bob Kevoian]

We've got a nice happy story. We have Happy Pizza News and Fun Salad News.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, Happy Pizza News. This will be good. Great for me, won't it? No slings and arrows coming my way.

[Bob Kevoian]

Well, you know what a salad is, right?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, my God.

[Jeff Oskay]

We'll be back.

[Bob Kevoian]

These are the O'Reilly Auto Part Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Announcer]

Just gotta get a hold of us. Call, text or email. Get all the contact information you [e-mail]. this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Bob Kevoian]

Morning.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, welcome back to the Bob and Tom show in the O'Reilly Auto Parts studio. Studios. Thank O'Reilly Auto Parts for all your car care needs. Get the parts of service you need fast from the professional parts people at O'Reilly Auto Parts. There's Christy Lee at the news desk.

[Christy Lee]

I just can't.

[Tom Griswold]

There's Pat Godwin. Hey, Jessica Olsman is here. There's Josh Arnold.

[Chick McGee]

There may be nobody funny.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, absolutely hilarious. There's Ace Cosby. Sorry, the last thing on his mind is this show.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello, Tom. How are you, buddy?

[Bob Kevoian]

You guys playing cards?

[Tom Griswold]

Welcome. Welcome aboard.

[Pat Godwin]

Why is everybody here?

[Tom Griswold]

Sit down. We'll do the end pal to try

[Bob Kevoian]

to find something over here.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, there's no better time than the on switch. Yeah, yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

Now, a couple things we promised would come up. We may get to those. But first Pat, I understand that.

[Tom Griswold]

What the hell was that?

[Bob Kevoian]

When we were talking about today in history, we mentioned one of the important events was the patent on this date in 1873 of Levi's. They'll recall Levi Strauss and who else?

[Christy Lee]

Remember Jacob somebody?

[Bob Kevoian]

Jacob Davis Patented. They patented. Patented blue jeans.

[Pat Godwin]

Blue jeans.

[Bob Kevoian]

I want blue jeans and I defect. I thought it might be a nice. And I. Do you have a tribute to blue jeans?

[Pat Godwin]

The current CEO, Chip Berg. He takes a shower.

[Tom Griswold]

Mr. Bur.

[Pat Godwin]

He takes a shower in his blue jeans. You're talking about how to launder them?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

This guy's famous for saying you never wash them, you just shower in them and then hang dries.

[Pat Godwin]

Levi's boss.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah, Here we go.

[Pat Godwin]

Says when he spills some tomato sauce on his dungarees. No washing machine. No. He'd much rather take a shower in blue jeans, babe. Denim unwashed. Keep wearing them till they gather maws. But I'd rather have them fresh and clean. Oh, you look like an idiot. Got a shower in blue jeans, baby. Maybe some deer. I can buy jeans only once and just throw them. Oh, great. But for tonight, I want clean clothes when I'm on a D. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Sweaty crack.

[Pat Godwin]

Wash your jeans and dry clean your slacks. Unless the naked girl's with me, I'm never going to take shower in blue jeans, babe.

[Bob Kevoian]

Thank you very much. A little tribute to showering in your blue.

[Pat Godwin]

Got away from it.

[Bob Kevoian]

Christy, do you like.

[Christy Lee]

Yes, sir.

[Bob Kevoian]

Take your jeans inside out.

[Christy Lee]

I do turn them inside out. Oh, you do wash them on cold. Yes.

[Bob Kevoian]

What's the point of that? Is that because all the funky stuff.

[Tom Griswold]

So you don't.

[Chick McGee]

I think it's more of a die.

[Christy Lee]

I think it's a dye issue. Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

So you don't think your jeans get. Well, any clothes get clean unless it's on sale. Sanitized.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, I like to have nightly hot water.

[Christy Lee]

Well, the dryer, you know, gets. Really?

[Tom Griswold]

I didn't ask that. I know you like to do it, but is the underlying thing no one who does laundry and anything but sanitized. They're always wearing filthy clothes. Yes or no?

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, they're lesser. All right.

[Christy Lee]

You must go through clothes like every other month because the fibers break down

[Tom Griswold]

so fast and the hot water heater

[Bob Kevoian]

fiber is good for you.

[Chick McGee]

How often do you do a load of laundry? That's one shirt or one pair of pants on occasion.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, absolutely.

[Tom Griswold]

What I would say often probably.

[Christy Lee]

Do you really?

[Tom Griswold]

How many water heaters do you have at the compound? You've got to have more than One.

[Bob Kevoian]

Oh, yeah, I got a couple. Yeah, I've got that. But I'm. I've got the. What do you call, tankless.

[Pat Godwin]

Tom has a current issue. Tom has a current issue with the guy that's doing the other woman that's doing the alterations for his blue jeans. Well, they're making them for a guy who's five. Two apparently, because he gifted me a pair of blue jeans that went to my knees almost. I'm not even joking.

[Bob Kevoian]

No, I got a batch of jeans and I. One of them, they. They're. I don't know what happened.

[Tom Griswold]

Among One of the. The many regrets I have is he invited me out to shop for jeans one day and I. I couldn't believe it. He gets all of his jeans altered. Yeah, I. I don't know what he's thinking.

[Christy Lee]

So the pair of jeans that you gave him, had they been altered or were they just bought off the shelf?

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, they'd been.

[Tom Griswold]

You had worn them, right?

[Bob Kevoian]

No, they'd been. No, no, there. There was something. I don't know what happened.

[Christy Lee]

So they altered them and they altered them too short.

[Pat Godwin]

Made Capri way too short.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, they take them back.

[Bob Kevoian]

They look like a clam diggers. You know, the ones where you. You go to the beach and.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, sorry, I thought.

[Bob Kevoian]

I thought. Because Pat has significantly shorter legs. Yeah, I figured they'd fit him, but

[Tom Griswold]

did you have a Billy Barty stay at the house at any point?

[Bob Kevoian]

Maybe a tape measure error?

[Pat Godwin]

They're comically short. I'm not even joking.

[Christy Lee]

Well, I would take them back to the altar.

[Bob Kevoian]

You were giving him to Goodwill, so.

[Pat Godwin]

I already did.

[Bob Kevoian]

There's some guy that has short legs.

[Pat Godwin]

Chico, look.

[Bob Kevoian]

Very nice. Very nice jeans.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, let's hope he has both his legs.

[Bob Kevoian]

Yeah, okay.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, but that goes.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, of course.

[Bob Kevoian]

At least they're the same length. Sure. The legs, I mean.

[Christy Lee]

No, that's.

[Bob Kevoian]

Well, very awkward.

[Christy Lee]

If one was shorter, one of them

[Bob Kevoian]

had been like 6 inches shorter than the other. Although I'm sure you like the Dudley Moore type of jean.

[Christy Lee]

Was this done at a department store?

[Bob Kevoian]

I'm not gonna say. Christy Lee's at the News. Did we promise we'd squeeze in one more story?

[Christy Lee]

Beets Hut franchise, bringing back the chains old school style to some of its restaurants.

[Tom Griswold]

I read this, and that's going gangbuster.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Tim Sparks, president of Deland Corporation.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, crazy.

[Christy Lee]

D A D A L A N D. This is D Land.

[Bob Kevoian]

This is a Pizza Hut. They own a bunch of Pizza Hut. It's not the Deland like Deland Florida,

[Christy Lee]

they're converting some of the over 80 pizza huts the company operates to revive the experience from the 80s and 90s.

[Chick McGee]

This is great.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Their change will include the return of the iconic red plastic cups, checkerboard tablecloths, red candles, iron table organizers, and the classic Tiffany style lamps.

[Chick McGee]

Excellent.

[Christy Lee]

They also feature red booths back. That's right. Accentuated with red. Or with retro photographs throughout the dining room.

[Bob Kevoian]

Good idea.

[Christy Lee]

And of course, the salad bar.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, terrific.

[Bob Kevoian]

Now for my Pizza Hut. To do it accurately, they're gonna have to put a Blockbuster Video next door to us.

[Christy Lee]

Sure.

[Bob Kevoian]

For old time's sake.

[Christy Lee]

And they're adding Pac man in some locations.

[Chick McGee]

I was gonna ask if they were gonna do those. Even the, even the tabletop.

[Christy Lee]

Tabletop games.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[J]

Does it get the Simpsons.

[Christy Lee]

Isn't that where you played at a pizza? Was it at a Pizza Hut?

[Bob Kevoian]

But that's, that's a smart move.

[Chick McGee]

Now if they reinstitute the. Read a book. Get a personal pan pizza.

[J]

I think they are doing the book it program.

[Chick McGee]

Excellent.

[J]

I thought I saw that somewhere.

[Chick McGee]

That was huge.

[J]

Oh, I would lie all the time. Like I read this book.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, that's right.

[Chick McGee]

Might be why they got rid of it.

[Pat Godwin]

Feed the whole.

[J]

My mom was in on it. She'd ask me questions I knew for the book.

[Bob Kevoian]

Well, kind of a fun thing. And yesterday Pizza Hut won that. They won that survey.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Bob Kevoian]

People love Pizza Hut of the most pop. I guess it was the considered to be the best pizza among that particular sphere of pizza joints. Kind of fun. Kind of cool. A nice, fun pizza story coming up. We have a salad story tomorrow. Tomorrow we can do a little homework and look into what a salad might be. What's in it. Who's he looking at? I'm not, I'm not.

[Chick McGee]

I'm not acknowledging his presence. Is he looking at me?

[Bob Kevoian]

Is that.

[Chick McGee]

Son of a.

[Bob Kevoian]

These are the O'Reilly. These are the O'Reilly Auto.

[Tom Griswold]

There we go.

[Bob Kevoian]

These are the O'Reilly Riley Auto Parts Studios. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Announcer]

Thanks for listening to the Bob and Tom show this morning, even though we're not too much to look at. You can also watch the show on our YouTube channel, the Hammer Alley Podcast,

[Tom Griswold]

an 80s flashback mockumentary.

[Bob Kevoian]

Back in the 80s, there were a thousand bands trying to make it in the world of rock. But there was one band that had it all. Hammer Alley.

[Tom Griswold]

Whatever happened to Hammer Alley?

[Chick McGee]

How did they go from top of the rock?

[Pat Godwin]

I'm looking, looking for a music video.

[Tom Griswold]

They're a band from 1987.

[Chick McGee]

Hammer Alley.

[Pat Godwin]

Ever heard of them?

[Tom Griswold]

To rock bottom, dude.

[Bob Kevoian]

I was born in 1987.

[Ali Breen]

I can't believe he's doing this.

[Tom Griswold]

Hammer Alley.

[Announcer]

Follow and listen on your favorite platform.