The BOB & TOM Show - November 27, 2025

Summary

The BOB & TOM Show Free Podcast

Episode: The BOB & TOM Show – November 27, 2025

Release Date: November 28, 2025
Hosts: Tom Griswold, Chick McGee, Christy Lee, Josh Arnold, Ace Cosby
Guests/Regulars: Al Jackson, Pat Godwin, Jimmy Pardo, Drew Powell, Auggie Smith, assorted call-ins

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Overview

This lively Thanksgiving-themed episode features The BOB & TOM Show’s signature blend of comedy, banter, news, and sports. The crew exchanges personal Thanksgiving stories, riffs on holiday traditions (and mishaps), and welcomes regular contributors Al Jackson, Jimmy Pardo, and Drew Powell. From “Mr. Obvious” sketch comedy to deep dives into gravy fountains, Mac & Cheese debates, TSA food rules, and an epic T-shirt discussion with Jimmy Pardo, the episode is packed with the group’s trademark humor, playful roasting, and sincere moments about family and holidays.

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Episode Structure & Key Segments

1. Cold Open (00:00–01:15)

• Standard sponsored content and advertisements for Apple Watch sleep score and AmEx cards (skipped per guidelines).

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2. "Mr. Obvious" Thanksgiving Sketch (01:15–05:12)

Description:
A classic BOB & TOM “Mr. Obvious” call-in bit, where a clueless listener can’t figure out why his turkey turns out tough every year—only to reveal he’s been trying to roast a live turkey.

Notable Quotes & Moments:

• Tom Griswold: "I tried cooking one the last five years and just haven't had any success..."
• Chick McGee / Mr. Obvious (03:55): "Turkey's alive, isn't he?"
• Tom Griswold (03:57): "Oh yeah, he's alive, there's no doubt about that. He's a tough old bird."
• Chick McGee (04:42): "Caller, you… you can't cook the turkey until he's dead."

This opening sets the episode's goofy, holiday-centric tone.

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3. Morning Team Banter & Thanksgiving Plans (05:13–14:28)

Topics Covered:

• Crew welcomes back Jessica Alsman after illness.
• Teasing upcoming Bloody Mary tastings (“We got the vodka down there. I’ll tell you about it in a second.” —Tom, 06:42).
• Discussion of epic mac and cheese and the UK solo Atlantic-row world record attempt.
  • Ace Cosby (06:49): “Mac and cheese is so good.”
  • Christy Lee (07:02): “Ms. Emma Wolstenholm… she could pick you up and throw you ten shoes.”
• Mascot heist story: Army cadets steal the wrong Navy goat before Army-Navy game, nabbing an arthritic retiree instead.
  • Josh Arnold (09:23): “Arthritic, and one horn.”
• Team riffs on terminology: “GOAT” as "greatest of all time" and the evolving MVP/MOP (Most Outstanding Player).
• Christy Lee and Tom joke about the price of Thanksgiving dinner and family attendance rising after isolated pandemic years.

Memorable Exchange:

• Tom Griswold to Christy Lee (14:16): “That’s sad.” (re: her Thanksgiving alone)
• Christy Lee (15:54): “Just because you’re alone doesn’t mean you’re lonely.”

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4. Thanksgiving Sides Deep Dive with Al Jackson (18:54–27:39)

Segment Highlights:

• Al Jackson joins in-studio, sharply dressed, and jokes about “Daily Blast Live” and doing dog-friendly comedy shows.
• Tom asks about the phrase “right on” and its music history.
  • Al (20:43): “Marvin Gaye still gets people on the dance floor like it just came out the day before…”
  • Tom (21:08): “Marvin Gaye is the only person who ever wrote and performed a protest song that was also a panty dropper.”
• Christy presents a survey of most popular Thanksgiving sides by state:
  • #1: Mashed potatoes (22:11)
  • #2: Rolls/bread (Christy objects: “That’s not a side dish!” –22:31)
  • Mac and cheese is only #1 in Virginia and Vermont.
  • Collard greens surprisingly top in Maryland, Georgia, South Carolina.
• Al Jackson shares about his Aunt Valerie’s soul-food Thanksgiving: “mac and cheese that’ll really make you just go sit in the car and reevaluate your life…” (23:42)
  • Team riffs on “charcuterie tray” as the favorite in Minnesota and Missouri.
• Philosophical tangent: Al Jackson (25:56): “Thanksgiving’s the best holiday. You don’t have to buy anything for anybody…”

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5. Al Jackson's "Word Lesson" & Language Play (26:54–32:55)

Words & Definitions:

1. "Sillage": (pronounced sē-yazh) – The lingering scent of perfume or cologne left in the air.
   • Al to Tom (27:50): “Some days he’s just locked in. And then other days... not so much.”
2. "Situationship": A relationship based more on circumstances or mutual convenience than romance.
   • Josh Arnold (32:28): "I wish my girl and I would break up, but it’s summer and she has air conditioning and my house doesn’t."
   • Al (32:42): “Absolutely.”

Table Talk:

• Breakups and who “gets the dog.”
• Al: “I think breakups involving the dog... that's usually the sticking point.”

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6. Actor Drew Powell Joins: Thanksgiving & World Records (35:08–45:46)

Quick Hits:

• Drew Powell (of Gotham, Leverage, and Pee Wee Herman’s Broadway show) shares career updates and celebrity stories.
• Guinness World Records: 12,952 cereal boxes toppled as dominoes at the Detroit Pistons facility.
  • Tony the Tiger says, “They’re grrreat” (joking impressions)
• Indian woman holds record for most teeth (38) – humorous riffs on dental oddities.
• Team derails into more Thanksgiving food rules, what you can/can’t bring on a plane.
  • Christy Lee (41:09): “TSA has released this year’s list of Thanksgiving foods that you can bring onto a plane…”

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7. Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade & Listener Letters (47:16–54:36)

Topics:

• "No Nut November" vs. "Drunk December", Coca-Cola's new holiday vanilla flavor, and nostalgic soft drink banter.
• Josh laments that Dr. Pepper was his childhood drink.
• Crew jokes about parade balloon favorites, K-Pop Demon Hunters, and the pop-culture overlap between parade entries and Netflix sensations.
• Riff on Foreigner and Kool & The Gang ("What year is it?"), and the lack of original band members in current tours.

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8. More Al Jackson: Thanksgiving Language, Scrabble, Slang (59:09–69:22)

Language Segment:

• Tom rails against Scrabble’s new “non-word” slang inclusions ("guac," "sitch," "zook," "Marg").
• Al (66:09): “It’s becoming more and more like the Urban Dictionary.”
• Slang term “dumb nice” explained: something or someone that is extremely skilled or impressive.
  • Ace Cosby (67:49): “So I’ve heard the expression dummy thick…”
  • Al Jackson: “Dumb nice means you’re, like, really good at [something].”
• Al teaches Tom “tricked that off” (73:01): means you had a good opportunity and blew it.
  • “Tricking off” means going too hard for someone who isn’t reciprocating in a relationship.
• Holiday awkwardness bits: gift-giving, uninvited to “friendsgiving,” bad small talk, and oversharing.

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9. Thanksgiving Traditions & Gravy Fountain (96:48–104:12)

Food Oddities & Traditions:

• Food & Wine’s “gravy fountain” is vigorously debated.
  • Christy Lee (97:02): “Food & Wine has recipes... specifically designed to be used with a so-called gravy fountain.”
    • Crew lists items they’d dip in: cornbread, mashed potato balls, sliders.
  • Health concerns about communal food fountains and past chocolate fountain “booger” horror stories.
• Friendsgiving: Invitations for those who might be alone over the holiday.
  • Christy Lee invites Josh Arnold, who agrees last year he cooked a traditional meal with Pat Godwin.
• Thanksgiving leftovers: waffle-iron potato pancakes, stuffing, turkey sandwiches.
• Debate over proper use of the word "side dish" and who gets stuck eating the worst casseroles.

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10. Thanksgiving Spending & PETA's "Arm Barn" (115:36–122:30)

Key Bits:

• Tom rails against annual news stories about Thanksgiving cost increases.
• Debate about presidents “pardoning” turkeys.
• PETA wants to rename baseball’s "bullpen" the "arm barn."
  • Chick McGee (120:14): “That sounds like a place that sells devices for people who lost an arm...”
  • Group devolves into “dress barn” and “arm pit” jokes.

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11. Listener Letters, Maraschino Cherry Pie Tragedy, and Forced Holiday Foods (160:43–165:56)

Heartfelt & Hilarious:

• Letter about a dreaded zucchini casserole everyone pretends to like
• Tom advocates politeness: “I will always taste what someone brings...”
• Josh insists on honesty: "If they can’t handle it that you don’t like it, you don’t need them in your life."
• Chick McGee admits to having to remove his shirt for “major transactions” (longtime running joke).

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12. Jimmy Pardo In Studio: Concert T-Shirts & Standup (141:06–159:01)

Segment Highlights:

• Jimmy Pardo jokes about being bumped from Tom’s “top 3” to his “top 10” shows.
• T-shirt deep dive: alphabetizing classic rock shirts, why it’s okay to wear band shirts to concerts, rare/oldest shirts.
  • Jimmy: "I alphabetize by first name. When you do your albums, would you put Tom Jones in T or J?"
• Team diverges on the etiquette of gifting, honesty with family, and senior-high pube development.

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Notable Quotes by Timestamp

• Chick McGee (04:42): "Caller, you… you can't cook the turkey until he's dead."
• Tom Griswold (21:08): "Marvin Gaye is the only person who ever wrote and performed a protest song that was also a panty dropper."
• Al Jackson (25:56): “Thanksgiving is the best holiday. You don't have to buy anything for anybody... All you have to do is show up and eat and sit there and get drunk and watch the Lions lose.”
• Christy Lee (15:54): "Just because you're alone doesn't mean you're lonely."
• Ace Cosby (67:49): “So I've heard the expression dummy thick…”
• Al Jackson (68:02): "Dumb nice means you're, like, really good at it."
• Josh Arnold (32:28): "I wish my girl and I would break up, but it's summer and she has air conditioning and my house doesn't."
• Chick McGee (120:14): "That sounds like a place that sells devices for people who have sadly lost an arm — the arm barn..."
• Tom Griswold (116:18): "If your turkey's a little more this year, hey, thank your lucky stars that you're doing okay and you can have a nice turkey dinner."

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Tone & Style

• Loosely structured, fast-paced, and irreverent; classic morning-drive radio banter.
• Most humor is playful, self-deprecating, and affectionate, though not without sharp barbs.
• Show rhythm alternates between ensemble riffing, regular comedic segments, and interviews/highlights with recurring guests, punctuated by both silly bits (gravy fountain!) and sincere talk about family and holidays.

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Timestamps for Key Segments

| Timestamp | Segment Description | |---------------|--------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 01:15–05:12 | "Mr. Obvious" Thanksgiving Sketch | | 06:49–14:28 | Thanksgiving plans, mascot heist, meal cost debate | | 18:54–27:39 | Al Jackson on Thanksgiving, favorite sides, and family stories | | 26:54–32:55 | Al Jackson Language Lesson: "Sillage," "Situationship" | | 35:08–45:46 | Drew Powell, records, and TSA Thanksgiving food rules | | 47:16–54:36 | No Nut November, parade balloons, and band nostalgia | | 59:09–69:22 | Al Jackson: Holiday slang, Scrabble, “dumb nice,” "tricked off" explained| | 96:48–104:12 | Gravy fountain, Friendsgiving, leftovers | | 115:36–122:30 | Thanksgiving costs, PETA's ‘arm barn’, and turkey pardons | | 141:06–159:01 | Jimmy Pardo: Standup, T-shirts, concert stories | | 160:43–165:56 | Listener letters: casserole honesty, forced holiday foods |

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Summary Takeaways

• Thanksgiving is about food, family, laughter, but also about forgiving yourself for not being perfect, whether that means eating alone, botching a casserole, or inviting your friends over for a “friendsgiving.”
• Language evolves — sometimes into Scrabble!
• Honesty is the best policy, except when eating Aunt Pat’s zucchini casserole.
• If you're going to cook a turkey, make sure it's not alive.
• You can bring turkey on a plane, but leave the gravy in your checked luggage.
• Don’t let an overflowing cologne cloud clear the room — unless you want to, and know that your coworkers are keeping score.
• And, yes, it's okay to wear your favorite band T-shirt to the concert. Just know where you filed it in the drawer.

Transcript

[Tom Griswold]

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[Christy Lee]

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[Chick McGee]

It's the Bob and Tom Show. Hi, hello, this is Mr. Obvious, and welcome to the Mr. Obvious Show. Let's take a coffee, Mr. Obvious Show.

[Tom Griswold]

Um, hello, is this Mr. Obvious?

[Chick McGee]

Speaking.

[Tom Griswold]

Hi, Mr. Obvious, longtime listener, first time caller.

[Chick McGee]

Well, thanks very much, caller. How can I help?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, Mr.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Obvious, I need some advice on cooking a turkey.

[Tom Griswold]

I tried cooking one the last five years and I just haven't had any success.

[Chick McGee]

Well, now, let's start at the beginning. Do you have a big roasting pan?

[Jimmy Pardo]

I sure do, Mr.

[Tom Griswold]

Obvious.

[Josh Arnold]

Good.

[Chick McGee]

Now, do you have an oven?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, of course I do, Mr. Obvious. I'm no idiot, Mr. Obvious. I'M NOT like a lot of those people that call your show.

[Chick McGee]

Well, now, please don't take offense at this question. Do you actually have a turkey?

[Tom Griswold]

Sure, Mr. Obvious. I got a nice big 25 pound turkey.

[Chick McGee]

Great. Have you stuffed your turkey collar?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah, that's all done.

[Chick McGee]

Preheated the oven?

[Tom Griswold]

Yep.

[Al Jackson]

Wow.

[Chick McGee]

Caller, I don't mind telling you, Mr. Obvious is a little bit puzzled at this point as to why you haven't been able to successfully cook your turkey in the past.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, I am too, Mr. Obvious.

[Chick McGee]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, the problem is the turkey's just too tough.

[Chick McGee]

Hmm, too tough, you say?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah. Real, real tough.

[Chick McGee]

Now, do you baste the turkey?

[Tom Griswold]

Yep, I tried that and it didn't seem to help.

[Chick McGee]

Have you thought about putting the turkey in a bag?

[Tom Griswold]

In a bag, Mr. Obvious?

[Chick McGee]

Yes, sir, Recaller. Many people swear by this method of cooking a turkey.

[Tom Griswold]

That sounds kind of hard, Mr. Obvious. Hard?

[Chick McGee]

Why, why? No, caller, it's not hard at all.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Well, if you say so.

[Tom Griswold]

Can you hang on a second?

[Chick McGee]

I can give it a try.

[Tom Griswold]

While I got you on the phone here.

[Chick McGee]

Well, normally Mr. Obvious is pressed for time, but for a caller like you, I'll spare a few seconds. Go ahead, put your tiki in the bag, I'll hold it.

[Tom Griswold]

Great. Thanks, Mr. Obvious.

[Al Jackson]

I'll be right back.

[Chick McGee]

All right, come here boys, get in this bag. What?

[Tom Griswold]

What's going on?

[Chick McGee]

What's going on there? Calm down, boy. What the. Come on, get in the. What. What's going on there? Call.

[Tom Griswold]

Call her.

[Chick McGee]

Don't fight me, call her.

[Christy Lee]

Hello?

[Jimmy Pardo]

Ow.

[Chick McGee]

Dad.

[Tom Griswold]

Scum it.

[Chick McGee]

Why do I even try? Mr.

[Tom Griswold]

Obvious.

[Chick McGee]

Yes, caller.

[Tom Griswold]

It's not going to work, I'm telling you. He's just too tough. I can't get him in there.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I figure even if I did get him in there, if he can get.

[Tom Griswold]

Out of a roasting pan like he has in the last five years, I.

[Al Jackson]

Don'T see how paper bag is going to hold him.

[Chick McGee]

Turkey's alive, isn't he?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh yeah, he's alive, there's no doubt about that. He's a tough old bird.

[Chick McGee]

You've been trying to cook the same live turkey for five years, Kyle?

[Tom Griswold]

Sure have.

[Jimmy Pardo]

And haven't had a bit of success.

[Al Jackson]

Mr.

[Chick McGee]

Obvious can't help but saying Mr. Obvious is saddened by this turn of events.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I know what you mean, Mr.

[Tom Griswold]

Obvious. My little girl, she gets sad every year. Try to pop this dog on turkey in the other.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, hey, here's an idea. Have you ever thought about killing the Turke?

[Tom Griswold]

Tell you what, Mr. Obvious, I've sure thought about it a couple times. Man, when that sucker bites me, I just want to wring his neck. I never been so mad that I actually seriously thought about killing him.

[Chick McGee]

Uh huh. Caller, you, you can't cook the turkey until he's dead.

[Tom Griswold]

Really?

[Chick McGee]

Yes, really. You cook dead turkeys, not live ones.

[Tom Griswold]

Hmm, I never made the connection.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Hey, that's all the time we have for today.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, Mr. Avias.

[Chick McGee]

Yes, Colin.

[Tom Griswold]

Thanks, Mr. Obvious, you're a lifesaver.

[Chick McGee]

I appreciate. Join us next week for another.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, Mr. Obvious.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah?

[Tom Griswold]

One more thing. How long do turkeys typically live?

[Chick McGee]

Join us next week. Mr. Obvious show.

[Tom Griswold]

Good morning.

[Chick McGee]

Hello. From coast to coast, it's the Bob and Tom Show.

[Tom Griswold]

Bob and Tom. Bo and Tom.

[Chick McGee]

Bob and Tom. Many portions of the upcoming program have.

[Tom Griswold]

Been pre recorded, meaning they've already happened.

[Chick McGee]

And they're about to happen again.

[Pat Godwin]

So where was it?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, oh yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Ladies and gentlemen, we're glad to have you here. It's the Bob and Tom show.

[Tom Griswold]

Right now I look around the room. Among others, I see. Josh, hello. I enjoyed your poem very much.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, thank you.

[Tom Griswold]

Christy's right over there. Through the glass I see the other Jessica, Jessica Alsman. She's back from her illness.

[Chick McGee]

Sounds so hipaa.

[Christy Lee]

I don't know, maybe I was on vacation.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, sorry.

[Christy Lee]

Sunbathe, watch the news.

[Josh Arnold]

I think HIPAA laws are out the way.

[Christy Lee]

I'm a narrative sinus infection.

[Tom Griswold]

Really lame dysentery. And there's Willie G. This is Tom speaking. And Patty G. Is over there behind the glass. We've got a bunch of stuff coming up. We're also gonna be trying some Bloody Marys. Have to kind of wait a little bit. We'd like to be able to finish the show if I don't have to.

[Ace Cosby]

Use any computers or mixers or anything. Can I put a little vodka in this?

[Tom Griswold]

Can I?

[Christy Lee]

That's what a Bloody Mary is.

[Tom Griswold]

We got the vodka down there. I'll tell you about it in just a second. Yeah. Now, did you have one more sports story?

[Ace Cosby]

Oh, yes, I do.

[Josh Arnold]

Sorry.

[Ace Cosby]

This Mac and cheese is so good.

[Tom Griswold]

I really gotta focus.

[Ace Cosby]

A UK woman is attempting the world record for the just his solo row across the Atlantic Ocean, according to the Lancashire Telegraph.

[Christy Lee]

Lancashire?

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Ace Cosby]

Ms. Emma Wolstenholm, a former RAF squadron leader.

[Josh Arnold]

So British.

[Tom Griswold]

She's a badass too. Emma Wollstenholm. She could pick you up and throw you 10 shoes.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm just saying her name's very British.

[Ace Cosby]

Emma of Wollstenholm intends to row 3,000 nautical miles, about 3,500 miles from the Canary Islands to the Caribbean at the end of January.

[Tom Griswold]

By the way, saying it nautical miles doesn't make it seem like it's really any shorter. Right. You're rowing a boat by yourself.

[Christy Lee]

Or nautical miles shorter than a regular mile.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, it's 350 miles equals 300 nautical.

[Christy Lee]

Thank you.

[Chick McGee]

You're welcome.

[Tom Griswold]

Very good.

[Pat Godwin]

Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

Willie just said it.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, okay.

[Christy Lee]

I mean, I wasn't paying attention.

[Ace Cosby]

She is aiming to beat the current record of 56 days and 13 hours set.

[Tom Griswold]

Except that they're longer. Right.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm sorry, it's less number, but which would make them longer.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Sorry.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes. Thank you.

[Ace Cosby]

She's aiming to beat the current record of 56 days and 13 hours set by an cumo, which will require her to row for 14 hours a day.

[Christy Lee]

Yikes.

[Ace Cosby]

39 year old is undertaking the journey to raise funds for RAF Air Cadets. 80th year.

[Christy Lee]

She's got some upper arms, upper body.

[Tom Griswold]

Strength, probably no boobs.

[Ace Cosby]

Oh, no. I feel like when you get the Upper arms, the shoulders kind of pop and then it puts.

[Tom Griswold]

Point.

[Josh Arnold]

What?

[Tom Griswold]

14 hours by yourself on a boat.

[Christy Lee]

That sounds like heaven. What are you talking about?

[Josh Arnold]

Especially to her husband who's sitting at home.

[Tom Griswold]

Sounds like cruise lines. Yeah, there's probably a lot of guys that they're going, hey, honey, I had an idea. Let's go for. Why don't you go for this world record? I got some, I got some earbuds. Earbuds for you. And some suntan lotion.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, what world record? Should I do anything? Where the sharks are. Where the sharks are.

[Tom Griswold]

He's a badass.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes. Yes.

[Ace Cosby]

Our final semi sports story. A group of West Point cadets trying to steal the US Naval Academy's mascot nabbed the wrong goat.

[Josh Arnold]

Uh oh.

[Christy Lee]

Uh oh.

[Ace Cosby]

The New York Times reports that the U.S. military Academy cadets travel to a farm near Annapolis, Maryland, the home of the Navy mascot Bill, and chased after the animals in the paddock.

[Christy Lee]

Right.

[Ace Cosby]

As the spooked goats ran, the cadets gave chase, grabs one of the goats and fled. Rather than taking the mascot, bill number 37, the cadets had instead snatched bill number 34, an arthritic one horn 14 year retiree.

[Josh Arnold]

Arthritic, and one horn.

[Ace Cosby]

West Point officials would not confirm details of the incidents, but said the animal was returned safely. They added they were investigating those responsible. This incident occurred ahead of the Army Navy game on December 11th.

[Christy Lee]

Oh yeah, big one.

[Josh Arnold]

It was an arthritic one horned giant goat that couldn't run. Now what.

[Ace Cosby]

Are all the goats named?

[Christy Lee]

Bill, apparently Bill 34 and Bill 34.

[Josh Arnold]

Billy goats.

[Tom Griswold]

A number of schools do that. They have, they'll have, you know, whatever their bulldog and it'll be the fifth one in a line. So. But this is this. So this was one of the former goats that they got.

[Josh Arnold]

They buy or bleat. I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

Ironically, this, this goat is in the goat hall of fame.

[Christy Lee]

Really?

[Tom Griswold]

And he's considered the best one. So he is the goat.

[Josh Arnold]

Goat.

[Christy Lee]

The goat. Goats, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I do not like that.

[Christy Lee]

I don't like that term.

[Tom Griswold]

Greatest of all time.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, but goat. Yeah, it does.

[Tom Griswold]

It's like when they replaced most valuable player with mop. It's MVP though. No, now they're doing mop. Most outstanding player.

[Josh Arnold]

I've never heard. Because all players are valuable.

[Tom Griswold]

But mop, again, sounds like you're cleaning up vomit.

[Josh Arnold]

And that argument doesn't make any sense. Well, all players are valuable. Yeah, that's why this is the most valuable. Not saying the others aren't.

[Tom Griswold]

Now we need a palate cleanser. Thank You, Willie. Nice job with sports.

[Ace Cosby]

Thank you very much. Didn't make one mistake.

[Tom Griswold]

When Chick comes back, we'll tell him. Oh, yeah, we did two and a half hours instead of your usual seven minutes.

[Chick McGee]

Here we go.

[Josh Arnold]

You know what? I did a couple shots on a plane. Probably the end of that. Guy was on vacation.

[Ace Cosby]

A couple shots on the radio.

[Josh Arnold]

Go for it.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but the palate cleanser, ladies and gentlemen. Of course I'm talking about.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Here he is with his joke of the day.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know if you saw two turkeys fighting in the parking lot.

[Tom Griswold]

I missed it.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, the loser got a stuffing knocked out of him.

[Tom Griswold]

So funny.

[Ace Cosby]

That's the funniest joke I've ever heard.

[Chick McGee]

So funny.

[Tom Griswold]

That tickled me.

[Josh Arnold]

Timely at best.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, that scratched me.

[Ace Cosby]

Where I asked you.

[Josh Arnold]

It's a theme week. Okay, I didn't see it coming either. I was looking for a punchline.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Weak theme.

[Ace Cosby]

You hear a lot about. You hear a lot about fighting. You never hear about turkey fighting.

[Christy Lee]

No, you don't.

[Ace Cosby]

That's the America I want to live in. Turkey fighting America.

[Tom Griswold]

Got a correction.

[Josh Arnold]

What did I say wrong?

[Tom Griswold]

Like most of our letters, Dear idiots. Oh, sure. So they have the correct address. Dear idiots and lady. Yeah, I am a ham radio operator. Oh, I was looking forward to Josh's poem. Unfortunately, he changed the premise. That's right. The poem turned out to be as bad as his scatting. As for the record, I have two ham radios listen to your show on a ham radio every day.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, you can listen in stereo.

[Tom Griswold]

Happy Thanksgiving. Thank you, Rick.

[Ace Cosby]

You know, dad, I feel like you're in rare form today. And someone wrote in today saying, good morning, superstars.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, he's got the wrong show.

[Ace Cosby]

And he goes. I was curious if Tom free based caffeine this morning. Good googly moogly from Mark.

[Tom Griswold]

It was a little. Kind of dragging a little bit. So I may have had a. You may have a cup of coffee or two.

[Christy Lee]

Supposed to holiday caffeine.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm allowed to have one. Certainly.

[Josh Arnold]

Now Chick's not here, but there's been a recurring. One of America's favorite news segments. How Tom has ruined my life. Yes, well, one of our favorite teacher. One of our favorite professions, of course has written in. I've been a high school teacher for 24 years and I've managed to stay hip with the kids until now. Tom, I have a student who hates me. His name is Houston. Every time I say his name, I sing. Houston, Houston, Houston. Thanks for ruining this teacher's coolness.

[Christy Lee]

Poor kid's. Name is Houston.

[Josh Arnold]

Thank you, Beth.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, that's.

[Christy Lee]

That's not a good name.

[Tom Griswold]

That's very popular.

[Ace Cosby]

That's a nice name.

[Josh Arnold]

I think it's cool.

[Tom Griswold]

A lot of kids, good last name.

[Christy Lee]

A lot of kids, nice.

[Tom Griswold]

Dallas.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Austin, Houston. What's worse, Houston or DeLand? Like what?

[Josh Arnold]

In terms of a first lane or first name? Sorry.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, why not?

[Tom Griswold]

Not as hip.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, well, the land works too.

[Tom Griswold]

Remember there was a Detective Matt Houston.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, but as a last name, I can see that.

[Josh Arnold]

But Houston's glory.

[Tom Griswold]

Austin's very popular. And there are kids named Dallas.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm in Dallas Page.

[Ace Cosby]

Dallas Clark. My best friend are there.

[Christy Lee]

I get that. But Houston just doesn't care.

[Josh Arnold]

Dallas never cared for you. He told me.

[Ace Cosby]

What?

[Josh Arnold]

Dallas never cared for you.

[Ace Cosby]

You're telling me former Colts tight end Dallas Clark never cared for me?

[Christy Lee]

Sorry.

[Chick McGee]

Dallas. No.

[Josh Arnold]

That punk. He was just.

[Christy Lee]

And you were just a kid then.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm gonna throw away my 44 and my least favorite story of the year. This one's everywhere. Of course, as I predicted a month ago, your Thanksgiving dinner may cost you more this year.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yes? Well, then why are we doing it?

[Tom Griswold]

Because it's not. Because it's not. Actually, in some cases, true. A lot of places are discounting their turkeys so they'll be less than they were last year.

[Josh Arnold]

It's news. Trying to make news.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but depending on what side of the aisle you're on, apparently the Thanksgiving Thanksgiving bird. The Thanksgiving bird is up above grocery aisle.

[Christy Lee]

What's wrong.

[Josh Arnold]

Boy? She had us hook lined Singer, didn't she?

[Tom Griswold]

Now, here's something interesting. According to a recent survey, 36% of consumers are planning for a dinner with 10 or more people, which is more than double the average last year.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah?

[Josh Arnold]

Well, that doesn't count at all. I don't want to hear about anything.

[Christy Lee]

Compared to last year, I ate by myself. Come on, boy.

[Tom Griswold]

That's sad.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, right.

[Josh Arnold]

Remind you of prom?

[Al Jackson]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

You got another joke? Zad? Chrissy Eating a cold.

[Josh Arnold]

I didn't know you ate by yourself.

[Christy Lee]

No, it wasn't cold. I made myself a nice meal, but.

[Tom Griswold]

Why didn't you come over?

[Josh Arnold]

I invited you, right?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I wasn't in the mood, I guess.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Christy Lee]

It was all right.

[Josh Arnold]

What'd your daughters.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you did.

[Christy Lee]

They were in Florida.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you have a candle and did you put it on?

[Christy Lee]

I didn't have a candle, but I plated it. I have a nice picture.

[Tom Griswold]

You plated it?

[Jimmy Pardo]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah. I plate my meals.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you take a picture of the gallows and the noose. Oh, gee.

[Josh Arnold]

Gosh.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Ace Cosby]

Just because you had enough kids spend time alone.

[Christy Lee]

Just because you're alone doesn't mean you're lonely.

[Josh Arnold]

Exactly.

[Christy Lee]

A lot of people spend the holidays alone, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Al Jackson]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

It's got to be rough.

[Josh Arnold]

Let's ask some of your family if they'd like to spend it alone. I might be shocked by the results.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you make a big. Did you make a whole turkey?

[Christy Lee]

I made a turkey breast. I didn't make the whole turkey, but I had turkey breasts. Cranberries, stuffing and green beans.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you go around the room and ask everybody what they were thankful for?

[Christy Lee]

Now, that's my dog. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

That is your dog. What? You're thinking I did invite you, right?

[Christy Lee]

Yes, you did.

[Josh Arnold]

I did.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

You can call me out if I didn't.

[Christy Lee]

No, you did.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

All right.

[Pat Godwin]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, it's all good, because I didn't mean it, but I still did it.

[Tom Griswold]

All right. Who wants that? Hey, I'm in a bad mood.

[Ace Cosby]

I'm gonna go hang out with Josh and Pat. Should be fun.

[Tom Griswold]

Pat, don't you have a song about eating alone?

[Josh Arnold]

I do, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Could we come back with that?

[Jimmy Pardo]

Sure.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

In honor of Christie's Thanksgiving last year.

[Christy Lee]

I should have kept my mouth. When will I learn?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Best to be honest. Did you have, like, sad music playing?

[Josh Arnold]

No sad music.

[Christy Lee]

You know, I didn't. Honestly.

[Tom Griswold]

Naturally, you remember that song. Like, his mom dies about halfway through the song. About three people die. Open up your wrists.

[Christy Lee]

I didn't even remember I was alone until somebody asked me what I did last year.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, your mind blocks down. I like pregnancy, pain, depression.

[Ace Cosby]

She's literally the only one of us with a healthy work life, balance and a good social life.

[Chick McGee]

Let her have.

[Josh Arnold]

Seemingly. She's got you snowed. She's the craziest one.

[Tom Griswold]

So blue crack pipe in her glove box. Y bottle of luck. Wait a second. Christie's Thanksgiving?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. I had flowers.

[Josh Arnold]

I gotta post that.

[Ace Cosby]

Oh, Christy, I was being nice. That is the saddest picture.

[Josh Arnold]

That was. That's much sadder than what? I have to put the dildo next to the plate of food.

[Tom Griswold]

That's just for. That's just for scale. To show the fact that she ate almost well.

[Chick McGee]

Happy.

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

Thanks. Good morning and welcome to the Bob and Tom Show. The best of the Bob and Tom Show. Here for a Thanksgiving morning. It's all about Thanksgiving. Jimmy Pardo is coming up, Augie Smith, Al Jackson, Drew Powell and lots more. Matter of fact, coming up next, a segment with Al Jackson. Little Thanksgiving talk with Al. It's coming up in just a minute here on the Bob and Tom Show.

[Al Jackson]

This episode is brought to you by Netflix. Global superstar and comedy sensation Kevin Hart returns for his fifth Netflix special. Acting My Age.

[Ace Cosby]

I'm not the same man that I used to be.

[Al Jackson]

I go down the stairs sideways.

[Chick McGee]

Go ahead. You in a rush.

[Al Jackson]

Go around with a fresh perspective on life, family and getting older.

[Tom Griswold]

Older you get, the less you can have.

[Al Jackson]

Is this sesame seeds on that bun?

[Christy Lee]

Get it out of here.

[Tom Griswold]

Kevin's bringing his signature high energy humor.

[Al Jackson]

And physical comedy in a true return to his standup or watch Kevin Hart, Acting My Age now streaming only on Netflix.

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

We're back now with more of the Bob and Tom show here on this Thanksgiving morning. Little Al Jackson for you talking Thanksgiving on this Thursday morning, I'm Chick McGee.

[Chick McGee]

And here's Tom Griswold. And we have a super special Thursday guest.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh my gosh. I feel like I'm about to be handed some literature about Elijah Muhammad.

[Josh Arnold]

That's not a bow tie.

[Chick McGee]

Al, you want to save Tom from himself real quick. And I do.

[Al Jackson]

Let's keep the radio show going for another day.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, guys. Jackson, my friend.

[Ace Cosby]

Great.

[Al Jackson]

Al.

[Josh Arnold]

That's a great, handsome, great suit.

[Tom Griswold]

Are you, are you just getting ready to go to work early?

[Al Jackson]

I, you know what? I obviously, I have the show in the morning and then I just like get dressed and just go to work early, knock my work out. I'm dressed like my dad at 6am I'm down for it.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, man. Awesome.

[Tom Griswold]

The show is Daily Blast Live.

[Al Jackson]

Dvl. I was gonna ask, I've never done a dog friendly comedy show. Willie, is this your first one?

[Ace Cosby]

I've done one before, Al. And I had to get a really important clip to submit to a festival.

[Tom Griswold]

And then I couldn't submit the clip because you can hear a dog during.

[Jimmy Pardo]

One of my jokes.

[Tom Griswold]

Was the dog growling or was he barking?

[Ace Cosby]

He was kind of. He was doing the thing. Then he was getting pet and his collar was jingling as he was making a little noise. And so I'm up there going, yeah, I'm kind of fat. I'm kind of. And you hear the dog.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow. Now, we had a couple lengthy discussions this week, Al, about the phrase right on. And whether or not I could get away with using it. Josh, apparently you used it on occasion.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I particularly, I texted a lot too.

[Tom Griswold]

And after several arguments, we were able to find the great, some great music that had a lot of write ons in it, of course, from Marvin Gaye? No. You know, just beautiful stuff. So it was an excuse for us to listen to some great, great Marvin Gaye. Like, what's going on? It's got a lot of write ons in it.

[Al Jackson]

What an artist. I mean, it's just this weird thing, you know, I DJed, definitely a lot more pre pandemic, but Marvin Gaye still got people on the dance floor like it came out the day before. Weird things. It crosses over every racial line, age, gender. It's just a weird thing. Like Marvin Gaye and Lizzo. Everyone danced to Lizzo.

[Chick McGee]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

As Tim Wilson used to say, Marvin Gaye is the only person who ever wrote and performed a protest song that was also a panty dropper.

[Josh Arnold]

That's so perfect. Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

No, it's true. It's true. And we were talking Thanksgiving and among.

[Chick McGee]

Other things, we've never gotten to this story, actually. And I'd be interested, by the way.

[Tom Griswold]

Christy has the story here and I want. You'll want to. You'll see what the question's going to be. Go ahead.

[Christy Lee]

A survey has found the most popular Thanksgiving side dishes in each state. Career finding website ZIPIA analyzed Google trends from last Thanksgiving to determine which of the classic sides each state eats. A disproportionate. Disproportionate. I can't disproportionate. Amount of. Based on searches for those dishes. So the survey found the most popular side dish in America, with nine states preferring them above all others, is turkey and casserole.

[Tom Griswold]

What'd you say it was?

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Al Jackson]

Green bean casserole. That's what I'm, That's. I don't. That's a random guess. Is that or mashed potatoes?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, mashed potatoes.

[Christy Lee]

Mashed potatoes is the answer.

[Chick McGee]

Mashed potatoes.

[Ace Cosby]

Nothing wrong with that.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Christy Lee]

Coming in second place. And this is another thing I have a problem with. This isn't really a side dish.

[Chick McGee]

Oh.

[Christy Lee]

Rolls or bread.

[Tom Griswold]

I think technically that's a side dish.

[Josh Arnold]

I do too.

[Chick McGee]

It's the bread course.

[Christy Lee]

It's just there. It's not a side dish.

[Chick McGee]

Whoever came up with bread being just there all the time. There's. I'm sure there's word for that that's out of my mind right now. But omnivorous.

[Josh Arnold]

Omnipresent.

[Jimmy Pardo]

It is.

[Chick McGee]

Omnivorous, omnipotent. Something like bread is that.

[Al Jackson]

Brad, is.

[Chick McGee]

Is.

[Al Jackson]

Is filler. And I mean, if you think about any, Any cuisine anywhere in the world, basically, meat is scarce. So like whatever you have around you, if you're in Ireland, use a potato if you're in a different, you know, if you're in, you know, like, Asia, you're going to use rice. Mexico rice. Like, you're just using everything is just used to stretch the meat. So, like, that's really what the bread is there for. Like, it's kind of like to make sure you don't fill up and you don't double up on the meat.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. But if it's really good, was it was the place that had the great royals. Charleston's.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, Charlie's.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, Charlie's.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, Charlie's.

[Al Jackson]

King Hawaiian. Those are good, too.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, King's Hawaiian is great, but it's.

[Al Jackson]

Not a side dish. A side dish is Mac and cheese. Where's Mac and cheese on this embarrassing list?

[Christy Lee]

Just two states. Just two states. Virginia and Vermont chose Mac and cheese.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, well, yes. Now, Al, what was a typical Al Jackson Thanksgiving dinner back in the day?

[Al Jackson]

It's just. It's my Aunt Valerie throwing it down. Mac and cheese that'll like, really make you just go sit in the car and reevaluate your life.

[Tom Griswold]

It's just so good.

[Al Jackson]

You ever just sit in the car, in the garage with it off and just be like, I cannot believe I just have food this good. Just delicious. I mean, Mac and cheese, cornbread, collard greens that have been soaking and slow cooking for days. And back fat just. Yeah, back fat that's falling off the bone.

[Josh Arnold]

Like Kardashian back fat.

[Al Jackson]

Oh, the best kind of back fat that seems like it's scientifically made. Back fat. I'm talking about old school southern back fat. The kind of back fat you get from sitting on a porch swing for 30 years.

[Christy Lee]

Collard greens. Three states. That was the side dish of choice, but the one that surprises me the most. Maryland, collard greens. Yep. Georgia, Maryland, and South Carolina, all selected. Collard greens is the number one.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Greater Washington, D.C. okay. That's getting into that. What I don't understand is baked potato. Who has a baked potato on Thanksgiving? It's mashed potato.

[Josh Arnold]

What about a twice baked potato?

[Al Jackson]

It's mashed potato.

[Christy Lee]

What about this charcuterie tray in Minnesota and Missouri? What the hell is that?

[Chick McGee]

Well, they're doing something wrong in those.

[Al Jackson]

States, but a charcuterie tray is to welcome your guests. That's not dinner. That's like we're standing in the kitchen drinking until dinner's ready.

[Christy Lee]

Can I say for all the lazy.

[Ace Cosby]

Kids out there that can't cook, if it's like a potluck situation, you got bring something. I'm A big fan of bringing the charcuterie. You go to one store, you're done.

[Tom Griswold]

Willie always brings the charcuterie.

[Josh Arnold]

That's fine. But my Thanksgivings were in Missouri and the charcuterie maybe pre meal, maybe. So I don't get that Charcuterie traits are. Charcuterie is like Radiohead. I don't trust anyone who says they like all of it, but some of it's really good.

[Tom Griswold]

That is a really nice, nice example.

[Ace Cosby]

You like ok, computer in the bins.

[Chick McGee]

But really, Pablo, honey.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, well, Al, so let's get to the point of this show is educating me in the world of language and what have we got today?

[Al Jackson]

And Tom, I just want to say before we get started, I feel like Thanksgiving because it doesn't have like a goofy coffee associated with like pumpkin spice latte. Like we're starting to try and skip over and go right to Christmas. And we shouldn't because Thanksgiving is the best holiday. First of all, you don't have to buy anything for anybody. Second of all, it's food for the people. If you think about food for Thanksgiving, nothing costs more than like $3. Except for the, the turkey. It's cheap food. It's regular people food. And it's all you have to do is show up and eat and like sit there and get drunk and watch the lions lose.

[Christy Lee]

That's right.

[Al Jackson]

So that's why I love it.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I've been complaining about. I love Thanksgiving and I'm tired of hearing the news stories about how your turkey is going to cost an extra 72 cents this year. Okay. Look at the international news and start feeling good about living in America right now. Okay. Be thankful.

[Al Jackson]

That's right. And that should be your Thanksgiving prayer as well, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Glad I live here. Okay, what do you got, Al?

[Al Jackson]

All right, Tom, let's do this. Tom, what is sillage?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I know this one. If you are on a farm in the silo, there it is.

[Chick McGee]

I think it's pronounced silage.

[Tom Griswold]

Silage. And it is the most awful smelling stuff on earth.

[Josh Arnold]

All right, that would be silage. What is silage?

[Tom Griswold]

That's a mispronunciation of silage. What? City folks?

[Al Jackson]

Yes, city folks.

[Tom Griswold]

See?

[Al Jackson]

Village with an S. Sillage.

[Tom Griswold]

Is it? So it's S, I, L, L A.

[Al Jackson]

G E. But you're on the right. You're. You're on the right. Tom, I. I did. I honestly didn't think you'd be this locked in this quickly. You're right on the tail of the. The answer just goes where You're. But just think about how it relates to a human being. What you're saying.

[Tom Griswold]

Sillage. It's not based on the word silly.

[Al Jackson]

No. You're on the right track with the bad silence.

[Tom Griswold]

It's an odor issue.

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

Yes.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, really?

[Josh Arnold]

No kidding.

[Al Jackson]

Tom is just. I mean, I told you, Josh. Some days he's just like locked in. And then other days, not so much.

[Tom Griswold]

But today, wow. I was at the bar, I was talking to this woman, but the sillage was so bad, I had to. Had to dump her.

[Al Jackson]

The sillage from her.

[Chick McGee]

What?

[Tom Griswold]

What? A gentleman doesn't discuss such things.

[Josh Arnold]

Must be her feet.

[Al Jackson]

Something you can buy. Before we get.

[Tom Griswold]

Let's just say, in the interest of it not being horrific. Halitosis.

[Christy Lee]

No, he said.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Oh.

[Chick McGee]

Was it perfume?

[Al Jackson]

Yes. Look at the big brain on chicken.

[Chick McGee]

Yes. That trail.

[Josh Arnold]

That trail. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

I had lunch recently and there was someone sitting in the restaurant. We talked about this and it's.

[Chick McGee]

Well, you're real weird about smells.

[Josh Arnold]

I am for sure.

[Chick McGee]

I could go out there and have a big fart in the hallway. And you guys are like, who? For the whole way, like, calm down.

[Josh Arnold]

I know. At that time I crapped in the sink. People are like, so.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm sorry.

[Chick McGee]

So.

[Tom Griswold]

Excuse me. Silage means. Like the perfume is so bad you had to walk away.

[Al Jackson]

Perfume? Perfume or cologne. Like that. That wind. Like, I had to have a talk with my son this weekend. He went on his first date. It was a. It was a day date. He went to the park and he's like that weird phase that every 13 year old boy where, like, he doesn't. He's not locked into the concept of deodorant yet. He's like, if it's there, he'll use it. But it's like, no, this needs to be an everyday thing, brah. And so then he's like, okay, well, I'm just gonna put some cologne on. But then you're just kind of masking the funk. Like a Frenchman, you know, and you can't do that. So that could be a P. Funk song.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, that happens here often. You'll go into one of the smaller rooms in this building and, oh, it smells like a minty turd.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Or a lot of guests will come in. Look, we. You can't. You can't cologne away that red eye flight.

[Ace Cosby]

You ever meet the person that thinks they're getting rid of the weed smell?

[Josh Arnold]

But then.

[Ace Cosby]

Yeah, smell like weed and cologne.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

Like a skunk rolling into gardenias or whatever.

[Tom Griswold]

So well, so what is the origin of psyllage? Is it from silage?

[Christy Lee]

Might be.

[Al Jackson]

I think it is from.

[Josh Arnold]

I think you're right.

[Tom Griswold]

I did.

[Al Jackson]

I mean, this is one of those situations where your. Your time. Wikipedia farmers almanac knowledge.

[Josh Arnold]

I mocked you, Tom. I apologize.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I. It's just dumb luck, believe me. And if you've ever been near some really rank silage, you. You'd pray to spend an hour in the Wrigley Field men's room.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, you.

[Tom Griswold]

Taco night. There's some bad silage smells.

[Al Jackson]

Okay, can I just say this time. And I don't know what's going on there in the building, so I don't want to start any beef, but, like, I know this happens. I'm just gonna say every. Like, who is using the bathroom immediately.

[Tom Griswold]

When you get to work?

[Al Jackson]

Like, number two, like, that should be happening at home, right? If it's noon after lunch, fine. But, like, what are you doing here at 8:50, bro? You should have taken this. Taking care of this at home.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't feel like.

[Chick McGee]

I don't think that's a problem.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I don't feel like there are early dumpers here.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, there are.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, there are.

[Al Jackson]

There's adults on staff.

[Tom Griswold]

If you're wondering why I'm in this bad mood today, it's because I ventured into the. One of the rooms down there.

[Josh Arnold]

No kidding.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. I'm glad they're repainting because the wallpaper's not that one.

[Ace Cosby]

I like to do it while I'm on the clock. I like to get paid while I go number two. I think it's fine. I'm doing it at home for free, like some loser.

[Chick McGee]

No way.

[Al Jackson]

Well, they're websites where somebody will pay.

[Tom Griswold]

You to do that's. Come on.

[Al Jackson]

Will he be a millennial and hustle?

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, Al, Al, we have time for one more. One more word here. What do we got?

[Al Jackson]

All right, this is. This is a tough one, but I feel like so far in my book, you've gotten these. All right, so, Tom, this is one of those days that you need to just go home and just hit for the cycle. Tom. So let's do this right now. Tom, what is a situationship?

[Tom Griswold]

This. I'm gonna guess it's based on the word relationship.

[Ace Cosby]

Yep.

[Tom Griswold]

So a situationship is probably. Well, I'm only in this relationship because due to the situation, we have been thrust together.

[Al Jackson]

Yes. Way to use the word to define it. I would. I'd say it's more of. There's a power dynamic, like There's a little bit of, like, there's something else going on that's keeping you in it. So, like, give me an example. But I will take that as being correct. But give me. Give us all an example, Tom, of a situationship.

[Josh Arnold]

I have one. May I?

[Christy Lee]

Yes, go ahead.

[Josh Arnold]

You know, I kind of wish my girl and I would break up, but it's summer and she has air conditioning and my house doesn't.

[Tom Griswold]

That is perfect, right?

[Al Jackson]

Absolutely.

[Ace Cosby]

That's perfect.

[Al Jackson]

A hundred percent. Yeah. Somebody, hey, she could just live really close to your work, you know, whatever is keeping you in that. It might not be love, but I think a lot of people are in situations.

[Tom Griswold]

I can remember years ago, one friend of mine stuck with his girlfriend because he liked her dog.

[Chick McGee]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

I get that. I totally get that, man. Yeah.

[Al Jackson]

I think breakups involving the dog is like, it's never talked about, but that's usually the sticking point is like, who gets the dog? Or like, I don't want to leave the dog. Or we got the dog together. Now what do we do? The dog is a big deal.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, Al Jackson can be found daily on a show called DBL Daily Blast. And Al often is the voice of reason. Who would have thought?

[Al Jackson]

I'm dressed like a lawyer that tells you not to say anything else to the cops. You've already said too much.

[Tom Griswold]

Al and I grew up about, I don't know, 2,000 yards apart. Both of our fathers were lawyers, so we kind of have a lot in common.

[Christy Lee]

Sure.

[Tom Griswold]

And Al, I'm sure start dressing like Alice.

[Christy Lee]

I would love for you to come in in a suit every day. That would be awesome.

[Ace Cosby]

When he wears a suit, it's like a five year old on the first day of school within two hours.

[Tom Griswold]

Shoes off.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm the same way.

[Chick McGee]

Screw that.

[Tom Griswold]

He's wearing real tight.

[Josh Arnold]

He is wearing a real tie.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, very good, Al. It's always a great pleasure. We'll speak to you again next week. Al.

[Al Jackson]

I love you guys. Have a love day.

[Josh Arnold]

Now, as you you pointing out that Al was wearing a real tie is like when old white ladies would point like something they would point out about Cole and Po. You know, he wears a real tongue.

[Ace Cosby]

Well spoken.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, really.

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

We're talking with actor comedian Drew Powell about his Thanksgiving foods. It's coming up next. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Chick McGee]

Bob and Tom extra value meals are back.

[Tom Griswold]

That means 10 tender juicy McNuggets and medium fries and a drink are just $8 only at McDonald for a limited time only. Prices and participation may vary. Prices May be higher in Hawaii, Alaska and California.

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

And for delivery, it's the Bob and Tom Show. Happy Thanksgiving. This is Christopher and the Bob and Tom Studios. Here's a segment with Drew Powell, actor, comedian. Thanksgiving foods is the subject.

[Chick McGee]

I'm Chick McGee. And here's Tom Griswold with our special guest.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much. He is actor Drew Powell.

[Chick McGee]

Hi.

[Tom Griswold]

Post strike.

[Al Jackson]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

The auditions have started already. And you think you may have a gig. Let's not jinx it by talking about it.

[Pat Godwin]

I always do that because I jinx it. I always want to talk about it. But yeah, we'll see. We'll should find out today.

[Tom Griswold]

What do people know you for the most? Gotham.

[Pat Godwin]

Gotham is the big one. But. But it's different. Like there's. There's a certain section of people that love the show. Leverage. I don't know if you guys have heard that was on TNT for a long time. Now it's back on Amazon, I think. And that was a fun character because I played this dude who was addicted to a lot of things, including tacos, cocaine, tacos, alcohol. But he was a lovable character and he's been recurring. And then, of course, you play Hoss Cartwright. People are gonna remember that. Even if that show was a million.

[Tom Griswold]

Years ago and you were on stage with Pee Wee Herman on Broadway.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah, did Broadway with Pee Wee Herman. And he just passed. So we revisited some of those. That was a crazy time. I dug up the picture of me and David Bowie and then over Bowie's. Cause people would come to that show all the time. And every night I would go by. There was a room, a receiving room where he would be still in his Pee Wee costume and whoever was famous would be there. And I'd peek my head in. And I mean, I saw everybody. Like Prince came one time. I mean, it was like. Yeah, it was crazy. And what the thing about Prince was, he never stayed in the same. Cause I could see through. I was a bear head and I could see through the nose. And so Prince would be over here, and then he'd be up in the balcony. Then he'd be over. Like, the guy would see. He never sat still. But. But yeah, I met Bowie and Big. My wife Veronica. Don't do it. Don't. Do not play it. Don't. Chick. I said don't.

[Tom Griswold]

She's.

[Chick McGee]

Damn it. Sorry. It slipped. I'm sorry.

[Pat Godwin]

She's a big Bowie fan. So I had a. She was home with being very pregnant with Leo. And I had a sign that said, hi, Veronica. And then Over.

[Tom Griswold]

Over.

[Pat Godwin]

I'll post it on my social media. But over Bowie's shoulder you see Peewee in his full costume giving me the stink eye. So it's an iconic picture for sure.

[Tom Griswold]

You didn't have the bear suit on, did you?

[Al Jackson]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Pat Godwin]

I was. I was in cities by the way.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Okay. So you're visible as you.

[Pat Godwin]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Good to know. Good to know.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. That's what makes it a picture though.

[Tom Griswold]

It would still be a picture if he was in the bear suit but.

[Pat Godwin]

Nobody would know it was not a very good one.

[Christy Lee]

Anybody in the bear suit.

[Tom Griswold]

Nobody knew that C3PO was what his name is Daniels. Whatever.

[Pat Godwin]

Anthony Daniels.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. I'm sorry, is it.

[Chick McGee]

Is that be to supposed sports Stupid world record? Are you kidding me? The non profit organization Move for Hunger has officially broken the Guinness World record for the most cereal boxes toppled in a domino fashion.

[Tom Griswold]

I love these.

[Pat Godwin]

Wow.

[Chick McGee]

A total of 12, 952.

[Christy Lee]

What's this? Did they have cereal in them?

[Chick McGee]

Cereal boxes were set up and knocked down at the Detroit Pistons performance Center.

[Christy Lee]

Oh they did.

[Chick McGee]

Beating the pre.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Beating the previous record of. Wow. 6,391 boxes. Old record. They weren't even trying.

[Al Jackson]

Wow.

[Chick McGee]

12,000. Almost 13,000 boxes.

[Tom Griswold]

We had the same thing with mattresses.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh yeah.

[Christy Lee]

That was funny.

[Tom Griswold]

And with. With mattresses it's. But there had you. There's a person standing in front of each mattress and they go down with the mattress.

[Chick McGee]

I didn't care.

[Christy Lee]

It did looked painful.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

It's going to say.

[Pat Godwin]

Say that could go terribly wrong.

[Christy Lee]

Right?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. The cereal box thing is really cool.

[Chick McGee]

I can't feel my leg.

[Tom Griswold]

Had a special design and they actually got Tony the Tiger to come do it.

[Christy Lee]

Did they?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

And typically. What did he say at the end of it?

[Tom Griswold]

They're great.

[Christy Lee]

That was a weak Tony.

[Tom Griswold]

They're great.

[Chick McGee]

That sounds like Tony at home.

[Pat Godwin]

Whatever. I'm off the clock. That's chick at 11 o'.

[Chick McGee]

Clock. 10 o'.

[Al Jackson]

Clock.

[Pat Godwin]

10:05.

[Chick McGee]

Hey look, here's another one. Stupid world record. A woman in India has set the Guinness World record for having the most teeth. Female.

[Pat Godwin]

Female.

[Tom Griswold]

Thrown off the set of a porno. Miss. She was. She was. In the short lived porno series the Biter.

[Chick McGee]

Kalpana Balan was confirmed as the record title holder with 38 teeth. Six more than the average adult. I'm sure you all know that the 26 year old has four extra teeth on her lower jaw and two extra teeth on her upper jaw. Though she could extend her record in the future. As she has two more teeth that have not come through yet. Jeez, what is this freak?

[Christy Lee]

Why should she have them taken?

[Chick McGee]

Out.

[Christy Lee]

Out.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, my Lord. The mail record holder is Ivanio Malone. Ivano Malone from Canada. He has 41 teeth.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, man. That doesn't sound convenient if you're a meth head. It's okay. The first four have fallen on.

[Chick McGee]

Still.

[Tom Griswold]

Break it even in the back.

[Josh Arnold]

Up to the front.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I'll tell you what I got.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, take me like a dog Elvis.

[Christy Lee]

Jesus.

[Chick McGee]

No, it goes like this.

[Tom Griswold]

Take me like a dog Elvis.

[Pat Godwin]

Yeah. There's a little more vibrato in the original.

[Tom Griswold]

That was a new one without the teeth, you see?

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

Okay.

[Chick McGee]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

So sorry.

[Chick McGee]

If you'd like that.

[Tom Griswold]

Sports. Yes, we have to have one that's up. Thank you very much. The traditional ending for sports, of course.

[Chick McGee]

Is.

[Christy Lee]

This is my 2 partner.

[Chick McGee]

For wherever you go, whatever you do, all always be a good sport. Christy.

[Christy Lee]

The TSA has released this year's list of Thanksgiving foods that you can bring onto a plane. These are okay items that can go through a TSA checkpoint. That's right, chick. They include turkey, either cooked, raw, or frozen, along with other meats like chicken, steak and ham.

[Tom Griswold]

So this is. You can take this carry on. And you don't have to pack it in your luggage. Okay.

[Christy Lee]

Stuffing, cooked or uncooked, can be stored in a box or bag. Casseroles. With the TSA giving the green light to traditional green bean and onion straws. The traditional one.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, this is. These are something more.

[Christy Lee]

Exactly.

[Tom Griswold]

Presumably at room temperature.

[Christy Lee]

If they're hot, you're gonna have a problem.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. No dry ice, Tom. Or if it's hot.

[Al Jackson]

No.

[Chick McGee]

Okay, what about corn casserole? That's the corn casserole.

[Christy Lee]

That's so good. Mac and cheese. It can be cooked in a pan or you can travel with all the ingredients except the milk.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Because you can only have so many ounces of liquid.

[Christy Lee]

Correct.

[Al Jackson]

Four.

[Tom Griswold]

Four ounces. And no gravy. Gravy.

[Christy Lee]

I've got to. The gravy. Hold on, Buckaroo.

[Tom Griswold]

Pass the gravy.

[Chick McGee]

Hang on, Mother Bucker.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Fresh fruits and vegetables like potatoes, yams, broccoli, rutabagas, etc, are allowed in your carry on. Spices are allowed. Desserts like pies, cookies and brownies, you can put those through the security checkpoint. As with candy. Now, these are the items that have to be in your checked luggage, okay? Gravy. No matter how thick it is, you still have to put it in your checked luggage.

[Tom Griswold]

That's gonna really Matter how thick it is. Can you imagine how thick is your gravy? But you arrive at the family celebration, all your clothing is coated in gravy.

[Christy Lee]

Because, yes, it goes without saying, you must pack carefully. Cranberry sauce, either homemade or canned, since both are considered spreadable, cannot be checked. I mean, even though it's.

[Tom Griswold]

Even though if it's that gelled cranberry sauce. Okay. Because I guess it could be. Technically, could be some kind of explosive adult beverages that C4 or cranberry.

[Chick McGee]

By.

[Tom Griswold]

The way, what airports have a gate C4. Okay, sorry.

[Christy Lee]

Adult beverages must be checked in the luggage. Canned vegetables or fruit. I guess you just can't take cans.

[Tom Griswold]

I just have some of that brown water. I need a little taste.

[Christy Lee]

Damn. Jelly and preserve preserves. Jam, jelly and preserves have to be in your checked luggage.

[Chick McGee]

Well, I've always wondered what is the difference between jam and jelly and jelly?

[Al Jackson]

Jelly.

[Chick McGee]

I tell you what, if you're going.

[Tom Griswold]

To take that thing, you're going to.

[Jimmy Pardo]

You can't.

[Chick McGee]

Jelly. That you'll agree.

[Christy Lee]

And maple syrup is on the list of something that has to be in your checked luggage. When packing, make sure your items can easily be pulled from your checked luggage for quick screening, though, as you go through TSAs.

[Chick McGee]

You know, Maple syrup is just like golf. You. You can pay as much as you want for a maple syrup. They have things are thousands of dollars sometimes well worth it too.

[Pat Godwin]

Only for Canadian Thanksgiving.

[Josh Arnold]

Absolutely.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you know that.

[Pat Godwin]

That.

[Tom Griswold]

What's that called, that. That delicious Hawaiian bread? You ever had that?

[Christy Lee]

King's Hawaiian.

[Tom Griswold]

King's Hawaiian bread?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. I don't know what they call that. Hawaiian bread.

[Pat Godwin]

What do they call that?

[Tom Griswold]

You take that on a plane, you can use it as a comfortable pillow. Just a little tip. Try that the next time you fly.

[Pat Godwin]

I'll try that.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Pat Godwin]

Are we on in Canada right now?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

By the way, I drove this summer from Indiana back to California and I heard you every single day. Every single day of the drive somewhere. I heard your voices coming through.

[Tom Griswold]

A lot of people making bad decisions.

[Chick McGee]

Pretty pushy.

[Tom Griswold]

We're also soliciting any unusual Thanksgiving treats that you may have on your. On your food plate. Your. Your plate for Thanksgiving.

[Pat Godwin]

If you can beat raccoon. That's a leader in the clubhouse right now.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, that's pretty much.

[Tom Griswold]

We're getting a lot of variations on something I can't stand, which is jello salad.

[Christy Lee]

That's been a standard, especially in the Midwest.

[Chick McGee]

That's festive, the colors and everything.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but. I know, but it's. But it tastes awful.

[Christy Lee]

What's the stuff with pretzels in it? Do you know what I'm talking about? It's like a salad thing with pretzels.

[Pat Godwin]

Is that the one that's like, white, though?

[Christy Lee]

It's got white in it.

[Pat Godwin]

I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

What.

[Pat Godwin]

The white part.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I don't know either.

[Pat Godwin]

Marshmallow is it?

[Christy Lee]

It might be sour cream. Cool Whip, maybe.

[Chick McGee]

I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

Marshmallows at cocoa or s'. Mores. That's it.

[Pat Godwin]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

The. The beginning and end of my marshmallow consumption.

[Chick McGee]

I've never had three bean salad.

[Tom Griswold]

You have.

[Chick McGee]

You had three beans. I don't know what three beans they're using there. Do you know? Like pinto, navy and that's all I got.

[Christy Lee]

It's strawberry lima.

[Pat Godwin]

Oh, strawberry.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, you're right.

[Pat Godwin]

My grandmother, who is the most innocent, sweet woman in the world at Christmas time, would do a candle salad. And it was, if you can imagine, a pineapple ring. Right. A banana. Half a banana that came out.

[Christy Lee]

Yep.

[Pat Godwin]

A little cherry on top and a little bit of whipped cream right at the end of the banana.

[Chick McGee]

And they never understood young Drew Powell would put two walnuts at the base of the. I mean, if you look up, look.

[Pat Godwin]

Up candle salad and you'll see what I mean. And God bless. She would never in a million years have thought why we were laughing so hard.

[Chick McGee]

Grandma looks like a hog. Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

A what? Oh, bloody.

[Pat Godwin]

Bless the candle salad.

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

We're coming back with more of the Bob and Tom show on this Thanksgiving morning. Next hour, Tom's incident at Target and more without Jackson. But next to no Nut November and the Macy's Thanksgiving parade. It's all next here on the Bob and Tom Show.

[Chick McGee]

Bob and Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

This episode is brought to you by State Farm. Listening to this podcast. Smart move. Being financially savvy. Smart move. Another smart move. Having State Farm help you create a competitive price when you choose to bundle home and auto bundling. Just another way to save with a personal price plan like a good neighbor, State Farm is there. Prices are based on rating plans that vary by state. Coverage options are selected by the customer. Availability, amount of discounts and savings and eligibility vary by state.

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

Happy Thanksgiving. This is Christopher in the Bob and Tom studios and this is the best of the Bob and Tom Show. Hope you're planning a good Thanksgiving today. Here's a segment about no nut November and the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade.

[Chick McGee]

Welcome back to the mom and Tom Show. I've said it before, I'll say it again. You know why? People love our show because they listen to it and go, well, hell, I could do that. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

At least they don't have that going today.

[Chick McGee]

There's Pat Godwin, Jess Hooker.

[Christy Lee]

Hi.

[Chick McGee]

There's. There's Josh Arnold.

[Josh Arnold]

I had a person tell me that we. We often bicker too much about really trivial things.

[Al Jackson]

No.

[Christy Lee]

Are you kidding? As honest feedback.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, wow.

[Josh Arnold]

And I laughed.

[Chick McGee]

There's Ace Cosby. I'm Chick mcgee. Hello, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

You ever hear that. That phrase, I would be remiss.

[Chick McGee]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

If I didn't.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

I almost said that on purpose. What an idiot I am. Now we've discussed. No nut. November.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, what is. It is. It's. It's not. It's not sober October. It's.

[Josh Arnold]

Somebody does. I think Kreischer and those guys.

[Tom Griswold]

Does anybody do the opposite?

[Christy Lee]

What do you mean?

[Josh Arnold]

Get drunk?

[Christy Lee]

Like drunk December. What are you talking about? I think December is probably the drunk.

[Tom Griswold]

Right, Right. December. That famous. That famous April is also. Yeah. The T.S. eliot poem begins that way.

[Josh Arnold]

What's that?

[Tom Griswold]

December is the drunkiest month.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. The tubers are emerging from that.

[Christy Lee]

It's a holiday party.

[Tom Griswold]

Enjoy quoting T.S. eliot on the show.

[Chick McGee]

No one else does.

[Tom Griswold]

I know. That's why I like to do it.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, that's nice.

[Tom Griswold]

We do have Christy Lee at the Silk Holidays.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Silac Insurance news desk.

[Christy Lee]

Coca Cola rolling out a festive new twist just in time for the holidays.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Christy Lee]

The company has announced the release of Coca Cola Holiday Creamy vanilla.

[Josh Arnold]

It tastes like polar bear.

[Christy Lee]

It's the first new limited edition holiday flavor. In 5, 6.

[Tom Griswold]

I like that joke. Don't they already have vanilla Coke?

[Christy Lee]

Thank you. Exactly.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes. What could the difference be? I wonder if it's noggish.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah. There's a cream base. It just says smooth creamy vanilla flavors that capture the joy of the season. That's Vanilla Coke.

[Tom Griswold]

That was my guess. Though I'm surprised they don't use the word eggnog nog in it.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I hope it's nagish.

[Josh Arnold]

That sounds Dickensian, doesn't it?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, is he of the nagish faith?

[Chick McGee]

Sir, may I have more nagish now?

[Tom Griswold]

Will you hear me?

[Christy Lee]

It will come in both regular and zero sugar versions. For those of you who. Then we'll get both. We'll get the regular vanilla Coke. The Holiday vanilla Coke.

[Josh Arnold]

I come in both regular and non sugar, depending on what I ate that.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, really?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, now to get away from the vulgar sex jokes of Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, sorry.

[Chick McGee]

We will back to the nicknames of Mommy part.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I want to. I want to ask Ms. Hooker something. I have learned a valuable lesson on this show.

[Chick McGee]

I wish you'd adhere to it more.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, before they. The slings and arrows from lesser. Lesser people from lesser archers do not penetrate my aura. Okay. Here's my. I. I'll. I'll make this as quick as I can. Years ago, we had a new story. Story about the hamburger buns where they were using. You'll remember the. The Krispy Kreme donuts. And we said, this is terrible and stupid. And then I ate one and said, this is wonderful.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Similarly, this morning, I brought in a chunky candy bar, which everyone had poo pooed and said, they're stupid and no one wants them. Everyone loved them.

[Christy Lee]

They were very good.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know if I've ever had it. They're delicious.

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

Try a bite.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. I can give you a bite in just a second if you'd like to. They're really good. So I'm. What I'm going to the point I'm trying to make. Is this Coca Cola? What's it called again?

[Josh Arnold]

Holiday.

[Christy Lee]

Vanilla Holiday. I've got a creamy vanilla. We forgot the cream.

[Tom Griswold]

There's a tendency, I think, especially among morning radio people, to just.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Knock everything and everything.

[Chick McGee]

What are we doing, Tom?

[Tom Griswold]

We're wacky, but we have to try it.

[Al Jackson]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And be reasonable about it. There are many things we remember. We tried the insect effects that were turned into.

[Christy Lee]

They were horrible.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

Candy bars.

[Tom Griswold]

They were terrible.

[Christy Lee]

Grasshoppers. Or protein bars.

[Tom Griswold]

But in this case. So we will. I will reserve judgment until we try.

[Josh Arnold]

I have no doubt it's good.

[Christy Lee]

I'm sure it's good, but they already have a vanilla Coke.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Vanilla Coke. Since the 50s.

[Josh Arnold]

We'll have to see how.

[Tom Griswold]

It's such a marketing thing.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, were you here, Ms. Hooker, when they brought back the Mr. Pibb? This is. Have you ever had Mr. Pibb? I have. It's like a variation.

[Christy Lee]

Like Dr. Pepper.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Dr. Pepper was my drink as a kid. That was my first choice. And.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

So you have to get Mr. Live.

[Tom Griswold]

If they don't have Dr. Pepper. It's sugary, but it's cherry.

[Ace Cosby]

It's all the.

[Josh Arnold]

All kinds of things.

[Al Jackson]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

You ever call it Dr. Pecker, Tom?

[Pat Godwin]

Have you?

[Chick McGee]

Instead of Dr. Pepper. Hey, give me a Dr. Pecker.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't think I've ever really. On purpose.

[Christy Lee]

You've never had a Dr. Pepper, have you?

[Tom Griswold]

I doubt it.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Your mother didn't make. So you Your mother didn't make soft drinks. Or maybe she did. No, I was. I'm.

[Tom Griswold]

I was a very loyal Coca Cola person.

[Josh Arnold]

Forrest Gump had a ton of Dr. Pepper.

[Tom Griswold]

My aunt drank a tab, which. I'd be at the cottage and open up the fridge, and that was all that was in there.

[Josh Arnold]

She called it scissoring fuel.

[Al Jackson]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Give me another can of that scissoring fuel. I'm going over to Melbourne's.

[Christy Lee]

It kept her skinny, though.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, Tommy, you wash my Subaru real quick now. Yep.

[Tom Griswold]

All right. I'm gonna go mash clams. Done with your stereotyping.

[Chick McGee]

Gonna go mash clams.

[Tom Griswold]

Mr. Pibb is the same as Dr. Pepper, but he flunked out of medical school.

[Josh Arnold]

I see.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, they. They have it with real sugar in it. It's called Senor Pib. Thank you. That's a thank you.

[Chick McGee]

Said 2. Silence.

[Christy Lee]

Is that why you brought this?

[Tom Griswold]

No, I brought it up because we're talking about soft drinks.

[Chick McGee]

You think he hears thunderous applause in his head?

[Josh Arnold]

I hope he does. Otherwise, you're crazy.

[Tom Griswold]

I just remember a certain person around here who would drive all over town to get Mexican co. Coke.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Before it was made.

[Josh Arnold]

Before it became people. I have stolen. I've stolen a lot of Mexican Coke from this building.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

I used to order it by the.

[Tom Griswold]

Case, but that's how I would steal it.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

It's now.

[Christy Lee]

Now it's everywhere.

[Tom Griswold]

It's everywhere.

[Christy Lee]

It is everywhere.

[Tom Griswold]

Just like, twice as much.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, but.

[Chick McGee]

And.

[Christy Lee]

And it uses real sugar. Duh.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. I mean, I've heard some doctors say. And we've all heard some doctors say insane things, but I heard they said if you're gonna have soda every now and again, just have a sugar sugar. A real sugar soda.

[Christy Lee]

It's better than aspartame.

[Al Jackson]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I. I can't say who told me this, but this person is a physician.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And she said to me, I would rather see my kids smoke cigarettes than vape.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Nothing to do with soda.

[Chick McGee]

Nothing. Nothing at all.

[Josh Arnold]

You heard the word doctor?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Al Jackson]

It has to do.

[Chick McGee]

I have something to add.

[Tom Griswold]

If. If one were to look at this.

[Chick McGee]

Ended his mind. Yeah. Tom, you tell him from a lofty perspective.

[Tom Griswold]

Perspective. I am. I am.

[Chick McGee]

You're always talking.

[Tom Griswold]

I am taking the structure that Josh has provided, which is something coming from a person of greater. Greater intellect. Russia, which in your case and mine is virtually everyone.

[Chick McGee]

Give and take dogs.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

Here are a couple stories. You're not going to want anything to do with all Right. The Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade. The featured event will be the K Pop Demon Hunters. That'll be their spotlight. Well, that'll be huge performances by the film singers and themed balloons.

[Chick McGee]

The balloons have jumped the shark for me. I don't.

[Christy Lee]

Haven't they?

[Tom Griswold]

You're not a kid. They're great.

[Josh Arnold]

Sometimes they still bring the classics.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Snoopy.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

There'll be 32 balloons, 27 floats and 11 marching bands.

[Tom Griswold]

Hope it's not too windy.

[Christy Lee]

All leading to Santa Claus.

[Josh Arnold]

Only 11 marching bands?

[Christy Lee]

That's what it says.

[Josh Arnold]

They always seems like way more than.

[Chick McGee]

The year they had Pikachu.

[Christy Lee]

I was out four new character balloons including Buzz Lightyear and Mario.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah, I'll enjoy those.

[Tom Griswold]

And the, the K Pop movie is.

[Christy Lee]

The K Pop Demon Hunters.

[Tom Griswold]

That's the most success, most watched thing.

[Christy Lee]

On Netflix ever in history. Yeah. Yeah. Ever.

[Josh Arnold]

I only saw the porno Cherry Pop Semen Hunters.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, Jesus.

[Tom Griswold]

Again we go down. I tried to bring it up to an A level that is less coarse, if you will, but no, there has.

[Christy Lee]

To be an adult film version of this, right?

[Josh Arnold]

Probably.

[Christy Lee]

And it's anime too, so that's a big. Foreigner and Cool in a Gang are also going to be part of the parade.

[Chick McGee]

What? What year is it?

[Tom Griswold]

This will include no members of the actual band.

[Christy Lee]

The gang still bring it. I'm sorry.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I, I've actually.

[Christy Lee]

They really do. Yes.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, they're good. I've seen them live not too long ago. But a Foreigner, there's no original members. Doesn't have the lead singer.

[Josh Arnold]

They're all foreigners.

[Tom Griswold]

No, they're. But I mean, it's, it's a cover band. That's true.

[Christy Lee]

Wicked star Jonathan Bailey has been announced as People magazine Sexiest man alive. If you saw Wicked, you know I'm talking about. Or you saw him in Bridgerton. Which one is he? Lord Anthony.

[Josh Arnold]

Lord Anthony.

[Chick McGee]

I got no.

[Josh Arnold]

Nickname for your Lord Anthony. May I introduce you to Lord Anthony?

[Christy Lee]

He's very.

[Tom Griswold]

I, I call him Tony for short. But not for long.

[Chick McGee]

Lord Anthony needs fed.

[Christy Lee]

He becomes an Anthony at night.

[Tom Griswold]

I, I, I was trying to get back to something interesting, so I looked up more. Oh, he's mad at you on purpose.

[Christy Lee]

I love it.

[Chick McGee]

This is. Remember we lost him early in the show because he didn't give me those two stories. Yeah, that's why I got upset.

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

I know.

[Tom Griswold]

I just, I came upon some more nickname names. You tell me which gender.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, okay. All right.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Okay. I'll start with an Eastw Tally Whacker.

[Al Jackson]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, Male.

[Tom Griswold]

Sorry, A pork sword.

[Al Jackson]

Male.

[Tom Griswold]

Male. Hang down. Male. Well, twig and two berries.

[Josh Arnold]

Hopefully. Any females in here at all.

[Christy Lee]

Look, he can't even.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm sorry, I just. I never. I had not read this. Well, the paste thrower, that's male. Male.

[Chick McGee]

I hope the rope shoe computer.

[Josh Arnold]

Sure.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. These are all male.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So in fact, I think you knew that and I think you set us.

[Tom Griswold]

Up an easy quiz at this point.

[Josh Arnold]

Just so you could say paste thrower or whatever.

[Tom Griswold]

Though I honestly didn't. I hadn't gotten that far down. That's hilarious. No one has ever said that.

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

In a. In a romantic moment, of course. Can you imagine?

[Chick McGee]

No, no.

[Josh Arnold]

I've said throwing rope.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. If it has the consistency of pain. Taste, you got a problem. Yeah, yeah. You need to have a doctor looking.

[Josh Arnold]

You've been eating horse.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, it's backed up a little bit.

[Chick McGee]

Who turned you on to these?

[Tom Griswold]

I told you, I. I have a subscription to Cosmopolitan magazine.

[Josh Arnold]

Who's on the COVID this month?

[Tom Griswold]

I get it digitally, so I don't know. I'd have to.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, they don't come.

[Josh Arnold]

That's how I get my prostate exams.

[Tom Griswold]

Digitally?

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, really?

[Josh Arnold]

I'm not fired?

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know. What.

[Josh Arnold]

Where are you guys? I'm working for my money.

[Tom Griswold]

I like the analog and now the new acoustic. Acoustic prostate exam.

[Chick McGee]

Really, Kip Winger? Really?

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

Coming up next, more with comedian regular Al Jackson on the show about Thanksgiving. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Chick McGee]

Bob and Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

This episode is brought to you by Ulta Beauty. Holiday cheer is here and Ulta Beauty has gifts for everyone on your list.

[Christy Lee]

Treat them to fan favorite gift sets.

[Tom Griswold]

From Charlotte Tilbury and Peach and Lily.

[Christy Lee]

Go all out with timeless fragrances from.

[Tom Griswold]

Ysl, Ariana Grande and Carolina Herrera. And you can never go wrong with an Ulta Beauty gift card.

[Christy Lee]

Head to Ulta Beauty for gifts that.

[Tom Griswold]

Make the holidays brighter and even more beautiful. Ulta Beauty gifting happens here.

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

This is the Bob and Tom Show. Welcome back. This is Christopher in the Bob and Tom Studios. More with comedian Al Jackson. Now, about Thanksgiving.

[Tom Griswold]

I'll tell you what, one delicious man is that Al Jackson fella? And there he is right there.

[Al Jackson]

I'll like, what's up, brother? Just. I feel like you guys may have become innovators in, like, let's start eating gigantic meals pre 9am Like, I'm down with that. If somebody's like, yo, we're having Thanksgiving dinner at 3, no, 7:30am I'll be like, I'll be there. No one's gonna miss that.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. There's a certain.

[Al Jackson]

You have, like, two days. You know, I'm here for it.

[Tom Griswold]

I used to get this argument.

[Chick McGee]

I was just gonna say, I remember distinctly one Thanksgiving where somebody was having their meal start at like two and you were losing your mind about it. Oh, right.

[Al Jackson]

What time should it start, Tom?

[Tom Griswold]

What? No, it was. It was starting at 11.

[Chick McGee]

No.

[Al Jackson]

No.

[Chick McGee]

Are you sure? 11?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Wow.

[Christy Lee]

We eat it, too. I like to eat early because then people can go to the second house. Because a lot of people have two Thanksgivings, so somebody.

[Al Jackson]

Okay, well, Christy, I want to ask you about that because you just. You spark thoughts in me all the time. How do you feel about. Would you rather be the first house to the second house? Because I don't like being the first first house.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, I like first.

[Al Jackson]

Talk to me. Why?

[Christy Lee]

Because I get people in, out on 6 o'. Clock. It's all cleaned up and done.

[Chick McGee]

Sound like you enjoy yourself.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. So what you're saying is you can't stand your family.

[Christy Lee]

All right, I did not say that.

[Chick McGee]

But can't go home. You can't stay here. Let's go.

[Tom Griswold]

You just want them out.

[Al Jackson]

The second house is the fun drinking house. So that's going to be a younger demo because you can't get that hammer around your aunt and uncle that are in their late 80s. So, yeah, the second house is like the party house, where people just go. And you just. It's like they have symbolic turkey, but there's also a huge bottle of Hennessy. Like, oh, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

In my defense, every other year I'm the second house because then we just stay the whole time and, you know, drink it up. But that's.

[Al Jackson]

There you go.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, now there you go.

[Christy Lee]

Board games and drinking.

[Tom Griswold]

Al Jackson is a standup comedian. He's also one of the hosts of dbl, the Daily Blast Live. Been watching this more and more. I was watching just the other day. You had a lot of interesting things to say about Dave Chappelle. Chappelle and that kerfuffle. And nobody died, right? Everybody's okay.

[Al Jackson]

Everybody's okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Those are just words up there. Okay. Okay. He was.

[Al Jackson]

Yeah, that. That used to be what comics did is they talked about really difficult subjects. I remember I got a chance to know and work with the late, great Robert Schimmel, who I credit with really sparking my first interest in standup. When I was probably 10 or 11, I didn't even know what standup was. And I remember watching my mom and my aunt look at this bald White dude who was saying stuff that I didn't understand. Cause he was making, you know, D jokes and he was making them laugh. And I was like, what is this dude saying? That's like resonating with my people. So, like, I ended up hanging out with Robert Schimmel and he had cancer. And he had like a 30 minute special. 30 minute bit with video and, and, and pictures of him going through chemo. And it's like, that's what's. And it was hilarious. He had one picture I never forgot. It was him in a hospital bed looking more than half dead. And, you know, the audience kind of gasps and he's on the side of the stage with a mic and he goes, this is my face when I found out that that fan won Last Comic Stand. So beautiful. And it's like, it's the most. Without that, it's just a sad picture of a sick man.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Robert's book is comics.

[Al Jackson]

He's the best.

[Tom Griswold]

It's called cancer on $5 a day. Think it is something?

[Al Jackson]

Yeah, it's.

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

It's great.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, we have a lot to get to, but before we get to it, Al, part of this show is you teaching me the language. Phrases particularly. And I don't know if you guys are going to talk about this on DBL, but they've just released the new 500 words allowed in Scrabble.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, Al, he is so upset about this.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm not happy about.

[Chick McGee]

He's a Scrabble purist. It's like some guy somewhere when they said, well, the designated hitter is going to be in the National League. That guy with bananas, too. And this is what Tom is with the Scrabble thing.

[Al Jackson]

But, I mean, I'm worried that I might be on Tom's side on this side. Let me, let me hear. What are you mad about?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, they're allowing words that aren't words. They're allowing abbreviations.

[Chick McGee]

What do you mean?

[Josh Arnold]

Throw them some examples.

[Tom Griswold]

Where do I put the story here? You've got it over there, Christy.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Approximately 500 new words have been added to the usable words in the game Scrabble. Recent additions include stainless steel, Stan.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, what's Stan?

[Christy Lee]

Stan is another word for a fan, isn't it?

[Al Jackson]

Right?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Eminem. Yeah. Does that come from the Eminem song? It's kind of a. It's not necessarily a positive thing.

[Al Jackson]

No, no, no. It's like a crazy fan. But, you know, what's weird is like, now I've seen Stan defined in urban dictionaries as a Stan Lee, like a nerd fan. And it's so interesting that that word's been around so long that it's almost not even associated with Eminem anymore.

[Chick McGee]

Wow.

[Al Jackson]

Only people like our age remember that Stan was a song about a crazy fan from Eminem. Now, like, kids are just like, like a Stanley, like a nerd, crazy nerd fan. But no, that comes from Eminem for sure.

[Tom Griswold]

So slaying is okay. Okay, how about the word zook?

[Chick McGee]

Is that on scrambled for zucchini?

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know.

[Christy Lee]

Z U K E Z.

[Tom Griswold]

It says food related.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. So I'm sure it is.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, is that put in the microwave? Zook it.

[Tom Griswold]

I guess. I don't know. I mean, it's just. Or no zoodles on there.

[Josh Arnold]

Now that's zucchini.

[Christy Lee]

Zucchini noodles, everybody. Yeah, that's pretty common.

[Al Jackson]

I'll accept that because it's in the grocery store. But zook is like a word I've never heard before. And if, if I did find out that that was acceptable. We were playing Scrabble. Like games over. Yeah. Oh, you can just say anything that means zucchini.

[Tom Griswold]

Now out. When we play, we always. It's an automatic double word score if it's a word you can't say on radio or television. Oh, so that, so what you want to get is. So you're looking at like the F word, the S word.

[Chick McGee]

So if you put the F word of the S word over a double word score, it's quadrupled.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Al Jackson]

All right, that's game over.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, but that makes it fun, certainly. But they're just, they're just adding like guac. Guac.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, sure, for guacamole, but I mean.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, sitch too, Al.

[Al Jackson]

Yeah, yeah, I, I, I'm kind of okay with those. Just because guac is, is such a regular word in our, in our day to day today, I will accept guac. I, if somebody said, hey, Tom, you're looking good, why don't you come over for some chips and some guacamole? You'd be like, what's wrong with you? Chips and guac, you know?

[Josh Arnold]

So like, I'll take guac over sitch for sure.

[Al Jackson]

How about is like. Stop it.

[Tom Griswold]

How about faux hawk?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I mean, that's, that's kind of become a proper noun in terms of, yeah, hairstyle.

[Ace Cosby]

Is that hyphenated, though?

[Christy Lee]

No, it's too, it's just total faux.

[Tom Griswold]

H A W K. That's going to be worth a lot of points.

[Al Jackson]

That's game over too. Especially if you can get that X somewhere.

[Tom Griswold]

So it's becoming more and more like the urban dictionary and more. More and more slangy.

[Al Jackson]

Yeah, I just didn't want it to be something like. You could put like TLC or NBA or something.

[Christy Lee]

No, not yet.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know. Some of these are pretty close to that.

[Josh Arnold]

But it might happen. I mean, they're trying to keep a younger demographic.

[Christy Lee]

You can do Marg for margarita.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, Marks. Marks.

[Christy Lee]

I'll take a Mark.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, a Marg.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, that's big margin Lock.

[Christy Lee]

What?

[Josh Arnold]

A Strawberry Mart.

[Chick McGee]

Marg.

[Tom Griswold]

Margo and Guac.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, Marks and Guac is a great restaurant name.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Mark and Guac. It sounds like the two cousins that you know. We only have them over Christmas.

[Josh Arnold]

Sure, sure.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, Al, why don't you teach me some real language from the street? What's going on?

[Al Jackson]

Tom, I'm here for you and the street. They were asking about you. They said they missed you. And the streets wanted to know. Tom, what does dumb nice mean? How would you use that phrase? Dumb nice.

[Tom Griswold]

Dumb nice.

[Al Jackson]

D, U, M, B, N, I, C.

[Tom Griswold]

E. Is it obvious? Maybe. Is it some. That someone who's ignorant and yet pleasant to be around and easy to interact with. They're done.

[Al Jackson]

No, those would be the two cousins you were just describing. Okay, this is. This is. This is. This would be a phrase that. It's a positive phrase.

[Tom Griswold]

That's really dumb nice. Oh.

[Chick McGee]

So I went over to the restaurant and I asked, could you give me some ranch? Because I like ranch dressing. And they brought back to containers. It was so dumb nice of them.

[Josh Arnold]

Is that. That sounds pretty good to me.

[Chick McGee]

Does that sound okay?

[Al Jackson]

No, no. That's not quite it. But it was. I like that you guys are so pleasant with it, because it really is a good thing that. Willie, you got a guess for me?

[Ace Cosby]

So I've heard the expression dummy thick, as in she. Dummy thick kind of just means extra. She's extra thick. So does dumb nice. Is it kind of in the vein of dummy thick? Does that mean someone's just extra nice?

[Chick McGee]

That's what I try.

[Al Jackson]

You're using the extra part, right? Dumb. That. That just means extra. But the nice can be other than a personality trait. You can be. If you're nice with it. That means you get. You could say, you know, I went and saw Willie. I didn't know he DJ'd on. He's like. He's nice with it. So if you said, oh, I went and saw him. He's dumb nice with it, That's. That means, like he's really good with something. So it's a positive thing. It just means, like, just being nice with something mean, like, oh, he's good at basketball or racquetball, whatever. But dumb nice means you're, like, really good at it. So, Tom, I ask you to, now that you have been hit by the streets, to please use dumb nice in the proper way.

[Tom Griswold]

I'll tell you what. We had the guys from Big Green Egg in this morning, and they were cooking on those big green eggs outside. I'll tell you what, everything they made made was dumb nice.

[Josh Arnold]

They were dumb nice chefs.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

You know what? Other than.

[Chick McGee]

Other than when you actually use the words you're supposed to and they really sound clunky and weird. Yeah, that. That's okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, that's. That's correct.

[Al Jackson]

Don't try.

[Chick McGee]

You know, it's not. It's not a commercial. Just use a conversation.

[Al Jackson]

It would just be, like, a skill. Yeah, you would just say, like, just. You wouldn't even have to talk about the. You just say, they're cooking, like, look, I thought I could cook Thanksgiving. I've been doing it for 10 years. But I saw them. They were dumb nice with it. I'm like, from now on, I'm ordering from them. You have to.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah. Did you taste that lamb? That was dumb nice. How'd I do?

[Josh Arnold]

You know, Al, you're on a TV show. You don't need this.

[Chick McGee]

I can't be the only one thinking, I'm so glad you still call us.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

That's all.

[Christy Lee]

I mean, my God, you sure don't have to.

[Al Jackson]

You guys. You guys sound like that. That relative that did something really offensive at Thanksgiving last year. I'm glad you still called me. Tell your mom I still love her. I may have.

[Tom Griswold]

Chick is implying that when I use the words you present to me, I am surrounding them with.

[Chick McGee]

No, I'm saying you use them like a television or a radio. TV announcer.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

You know, those are really dumb knives. You know, you're. You're. You're kind of incapable of casual conversation anyway.

[Tom Griswold]

You know that, right?

[Chick McGee]

Kind of on the radio in your brain all the time.

[Christy Lee]

Right.

[Chick McGee]

No matter where you are.

[Tom Griswold]

Just trying to enforce. Pronunciate.

[Chick McGee]

I'm not buying it. I think you're insane is what I think you should lean on.

[Tom Griswold]

So are you saying when I use.

[Chick McGee]

Those words, no matter what they are.

[Tom Griswold]

That Al gives me, no matter how well you understand, stick out from the rest of the sentence?

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

It's like the way when certain announcers of Of. Of. Of Spanish speaking heritage are on the, on the radio and then everything sounds. They. They don't have an accent at all. Then they get to their name and all of a sudden of a sudden it's, yes, and I'm also. What? You know.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

They suddenly go into full.

[Christy Lee]

You know the one that is.

[Josh Arnold]

You mean when they properly pronounce their names? Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

No. Or when they say if they're from Puerto Rico. Yeah, yeah. And all of a sudden it becomes that.

[Tom Griswold]

Which is fine.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm just how it's pronounced.

[Tom Griswold]

You're suggesting that I do that?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Puerto Rico.

[Jimmy Pardo]

That's how I say it.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Yeah, you're done.

[Tom Griswold]

Nice.

[Al Jackson]

Funny.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Yeah.

[Al Jackson]

It's hard with those languages though, Tom, because, like Italian, Spanish, they're such beautiful languages. And like people like, hey, when you're in another country, don't be disrespectful. Try and speak the language to the most that you can. And I, I will. But it sounds so bad coming out of. With my Ohio accent that it almost seems disrespectful.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Al Jackson]

I'm like, I don't. It just sounds so bad. I mean, you can just tell that it hurts them to hear their language pronounced. Like they're like dos batas de agua. And they're like, all right, dude. You know, like, it's just like, it's bad, but I'll always try. Now, Tom, this is what I really wanted to ask you, because this. You know me, I like to. I love the little nuances with language, how the same phrase can be changed a little bit and mean totally different things. And this is one of those situations. So, Tommy, if I said I tricked that off verse versus tricking off, what are the differences between that tricked that off versus tricking off? What would. Let's start one by one. What does trick that off mean?

[Tom Griswold]

I got, by using my cleverness, faked my way through, say, all of college, I tricked that off. Would that be good?

[Josh Arnold]

That would have been, I guess trick.

[Al Jackson]

That off would be like, you had something and you just blew it right in the. Like. Like, let's just picture, picture, picture Josh at a bar and two women come up and they're like, look, we are traveling nurses. We're leaving at 10 o' clock tomorrow morning and we want to have an experience with you. We listen to you on the radio, you know, no names, please. Let's just go hang out at our place. And, and, and, and Josh goes, yeah, and, you know, I just got this other new sex toy. I can bring it and they're like, what? No, dude, no. That's gross. And they leave. Josh would be like, I had it in my head. I tricked that off.

[Josh Arnold]

I just tricked that off.

[Al Jackson]

Like you have in your hands and you just. You blow it right at the last second.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, girls, I'd be happy to go with you, but this pizza's not going to be here for 10 minutes. Can you hang on?

[Chick McGee]

See if he's applying? Josh, I don't know if you're up to speed on this, but you'd rather eat than almost anything else.

[Josh Arnold]

That's right.

[Christy Lee]

That's what he.

[Al Jackson]

That's what those nurses are.

[Tom Griswold]

Our sex. Rob has to be put off for 10 minutes.

[Al Jackson]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Because I got extra cheese.

[Josh Arnold]

Can you at least wait till I'm done?

[Christy Lee]

For God's sake?

[Ace Cosby]

You keep 10 minutes.

[Tom Griswold]

Number.

[Ace Cosby]

Why is it taking him 10 minutes to eat one pizza?

[Tom Griswold]

I'm sorry.

[Josh Arnold]

You think it's faster?

[Ace Cosby]

It was just the consistency of him saying 10 minutes. I was so curious. Is it so vigorous that they wouldn't want to be there for it? Couldn't they just sit with you and enjoy it together?

[Tom Griswold]

It's a short, short period of time. You think that even. Even the biggest horrors would at least.

[Josh Arnold]

Wait a few minutes?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, my God.

[Al Jackson]

Jesus Lord.

[Ace Cosby]

You know what I should say?

[Chick McGee]

Thank you, Al.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm sorry, Al. So. So that's. I understand. Now, the other one is trick that off. What's the second phrase?

[Chick McGee]

We've got to find tricking off.

[Al Jackson]

Now, Tom, what do you think tricking off is? It's not. If, if. If you looked at Chicky and you were like, hey, look, I think you're really tricking off right now. It's not a great thing. What would you be telling?

[Josh Arnold]

And it's not me having at myself while eating a bowl of tricks.

[Tom Griswold]

Would it. Would it be exaggerating the.

[Al Jackson]

Exaggerate.

[Tom Griswold]

Exaggeration. Would it be chick, what he's saying? I don't believe he's tricking off. This is just fake.

[Al Jackson]

It would be in his relation to a woman, probably a romantic relationship. When you're tricking off, you're doing a little, you know. Well, I think you're tricking off a little bit. And it's not cheating. What would you think that is?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, is that you're participating in the relationship, but you're not really into it?

[Al Jackson]

No, it's more like you're participating too much for what they're giving you. So it's like, you know, this new girl that, you know, Josh is dating. I really like her, but, like, he's like. He bought her a car, like in the first month.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Wow.

[Al Jackson]

Like 12 months. He signed a lease for. He's got. He's kind of tricking off over there.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't think so. I'm not. I mean, when. During that lap dance she said she was having car trouble, I thought maybe I could help out.

[Chick McGee]

You know what I'm gonna do for you?

[Al Jackson]

Can she get to online school?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

We're coming right back with Tom's incident at Target and more Thanksgiving talk on this Thanksgiving morning. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Christy Lee]

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[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

Hi, and welcome back to the Thanksgiving Bob and Tom Show. This is Christopher in the Bob and Tom studios. Tom had an incident at Target. We're going to hear about it here in more Thanksgiving talk.

[Tom Griswold]

Quite an incident yesterday.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh.

[Chick McGee]

Oh. What did you do and who did you do it to? No, no.

[Tom Griswold]

So I'm at. I'm at Target and I'm getting new Christmas lights for the tree.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

You mistook normal citizen for someone who worked at Target.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, no, no, no. I'm by the way, best tree ever, possibly this year.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, that's nice.

[Chick McGee]

A real, real one.

[Tom Griswold]

It's a real tree and it's. When we got it up, it is just perfect. I've never seen a thicker one.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, that's wonderful, Doug.

[Tom Griswold]

Fur the short. Would I forget the. I don't know what the name is.

[Chick McGee]

You know, don't tell us you put your tree up if you don't know what kind of tree it is.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, 12ft.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, no, no.

[Chick McGee]

16 foot.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, no. It's a nine footer. Okay, so I'm at Target, and if you've ever been there, they have ever been there.

[Chick McGee]

First of all, I want to tell you, you people have no idea how stupid the people are listening to us.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I'm so. Let me finish my sentence.

[Chick McGee]

I need to walk you through one.

[Tom Griswold]

If you've been to the section where they sell. Where they sell the lights.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

The lights are in boxes and they're marked like A one, a two, a three. So the different types of lights, they've got a display, right? And I'm. I'm trying to get the A1 boxes.

[Chick McGee]

Why is that?

[Tom Griswold]

And so I'm like, why do you have to.

[Christy Lee]

Because they have the certain kind of warm glow. I'm sure.

[Tom Griswold]

They have to know. They have to be the warm white.

[Christy Lee]

I knew it. I knew it.

[Chick McGee]

She didn't.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no lights.

[Christy Lee]

I like the warm light.

[Tom Griswold]

No lights of color, as we call them now in our enlightened culture. And so I'm getting the A1.

[Chick McGee]

My dad said, tom, there's no way to live, boy. Go ahead.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm getting the A1. And there's a limited number of them left, and I need. I'm trying to get them on, and I'm. I pause, and a lady next to me, her glasses fall off.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, my.

[Tom Griswold]

So being a gentleman, I bend over, pick up her glasses, hand them to her, and she takes the last box of the lights. Oh, now what do I do?

[Christy Lee]

That's go to another target.

[Chick McGee]

You take her glasses. You take your glasses and throw them in the middle of the store, grab the box, and walk away.

[Josh Arnold]

No, tackle her.

[Chick McGee]

How old was she?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, forties.

[Josh Arnold]

Could you.

[Chick McGee]

Could you take her, you think? Or was she.

[Christy Lee]

Order them online? I could have it.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I'm fine. It's just. I thought, you know, really, this is like when you hold the door for someone at a place, like at a coffee shop, and then they go in, they order 40 drinks, and you were standing behind them.

[Chick McGee]

This brings up an interesting question. How far away do you have to be before you don't hold the door for somebody?

[Josh Arnold]

That sometimes can get awkward.

[Chick McGee]

You know, it's like if you see them getting out of their car in the parking lot.

[Tom Griswold]

In your touch, you hold the door. I'd say. I'd say 10 to 15ft.

[Ace Cosby]

10Ft?

[Jimmy Pardo]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

I say it's tough. You don't want to rush them.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

Because sometimes you hold the door open for them and they feel like you. They don't want you waiting, so they jog or.

[Chick McGee]

Right.

[Josh Arnold]

No, no, no. Relax.

[Chick McGee]

It's all awkward.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

This is why I don't go out.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Pat Godwin]

But.

[Tom Griswold]

But if you do hold the door for them and then they go in, they should allow you to go in front of them in line, especially if they're getting a big order.

[Chick McGee]

Is that right? Yes, that should come. But you. So you want something for your act of kindness?

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

No, I.

[Tom Griswold]

If I would do that.

[Josh Arnold]

Just said I would Go. Hey, hey, I appreciate that, but just so you know, I'm ordering.

[Chick McGee]

Your act of kindness is c. A currency that you spend on cash.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm ordering for, like, eight people. Go ahead and. Go ahead and go.

[Tom Griswold]

Should I have demanded the A1 bulbs back? Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

She may not have known you were going for.

[Tom Griswold]

I'd already put some in my cart.

[Christy Lee]

Well, you may have thought you were done.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I wasn't done. I was.

[Chick McGee]

How many did you have in your cart?

[Tom Griswold]

All of them except the one I'd.

[Josh Arnold]

Like to hear right now. She might be telling her. She might be telling her co workers.

[Chick McGee]

Yep.

[Josh Arnold]

Man, this guy was taking all the A1s. Knock my own glasses off to distract him so I can at least get one box.

[Chick McGee]

That's right. This lunatic had 15 boxes alike.

[Christy Lee]

Did you have enough lights?

[Tom Griswold]

We have enough. Finished putting them up yet?

[Josh Arnold]

Did you buy a Taylor Swift tour book?

[Chick McGee]

That's a great question, Ace. By the Taylor Swift.

[Tom Griswold]

No, but I did. I did go online and I got the poster of the show that they saw that was.

[Josh Arnold]

There was a big news story about Taylor Swift tour.

[Christy Lee]

I was going to save Target this holiday season. I saw that.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, really?

[Josh Arnold]

Exclusive or something?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, really?

[Chick McGee]

In the words of Tom, I didn't see it. I. I don't know know what you're talking about.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I. I didn't have time to do much over the weekend. My computer blew up.

[Christy Lee]

Wait a minute. It was a weekend for family. Why were you on your computer?

[Tom Griswold]

I. I barely was. It. Didn't.

[Chick McGee]

You know what the term blow up means, right? It means it.

[Christy Lee]

It catches on fire.

[Chick McGee]

There was smoke and all sorts of.

[Tom Griswold]

Things in a software sense. Okay, I've ordered a new one. It's on the way. I ordered a new one last week.

[Chick McGee]

The problem you had with your computer required you to order an entire new one?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I had our guy come over there. Greg came over, and it's. It's toast.

[Josh Arnold]

Yikes.

[Tom Griswold]

In any event, I didn't. I did not read a lot of news, Ace. I did not see that. Any tragic deaths in the news, Christy? That's usually your forte.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, my gosh.

[Chick McGee]

Well, he's not wrong.

[Christy Lee]

Well, that's my job. And really, no.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. No.

[Chick McGee]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

No one. Okay. Sorry.

[Josh Arnold]

Did you guys watch the parade? A little bit. I saw the Temptations. I did, too.

[Chick McGee]

Well, if the Temptations don't scream parade, I don't know what does.

[Pat Godwin]

No.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know what.

[Tom Griswold]

Speaking of deaths, Ball of Confusion.

[Chick McGee]

That's what the world is today.

[Pat Godwin]

And.

[Chick McGee]

Hey.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, can you hear it? Can you hear? I think. Did I mention that? I think I might have mentioned.

[Chick McGee]

Mention this.

[Tom Griswold]

In 2023, 97 of the top 100 television shows are NFL games.

[Pat Godwin]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

And among the other three was the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade.

[Christy Lee]

It's a big deal. Watch it while you're cooking.

[Chick McGee]

Yes, but who actually watches the parade instead of just having it on?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, that's a good point, man.

[Josh Arnold]

I sat. I. I pretty much sat there and watched this show, which is rare for me.

[Chick McGee]

You were riveted. Was Hoda and what's your face. Was hosting, Right?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. And this is Hoda's last year. Year, according to retiring.

[Chick McGee]

I know why Ace was watching the parade.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

He's a Hoda lover.

[Chick McGee]

He's got a Russian.

[Josh Arnold]

So all three of them, Roker, Hoda and the other broad and the other broadcaster.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you.

[Chick McGee]

What's her name?

[Josh Arnold]

I looked. One of the Bush daughters. No, it wasn't her. Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Thank you.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, they're great because Dylan Dreyer there when things.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know who that is.

[Chick McGee]

She's a weather girl.

[Tom Griswold]

She's very hot.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, like a Today show person or whatever.

[Tom Griswold]

She's the hottest.

[Josh Arnold]

This is the only time I ever see these.

[Chick McGee]

Ask for days.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

But they have to deal with. I mean, they're really great on the fly and they make it seem like they're not reading. And they're. They're quite good. Skilled. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. A lot of Broadway.

[Josh Arnold]

No.

[Chick McGee]

I used to like it when. I think we can find this picture. When Lauren Green and Betty White used to host. I remember that Thanksgiving Day parade.

[Christy Lee]

I don't remember.

[Tom Griswold]

Even though Lauren Green was Canadian.

[Josh Arnold]

Canadian. Isn't it exciting that.

[Chick McGee]

What's next, Neil Young?

[Josh Arnold]

There's a marching band that's within 100 miles of where you live, right?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

That'D be so. That's so cool for those kids to.

[Josh Arnold]

Go to New York.

[Al Jackson]

So cool.

[Josh Arnold]

It is exciting.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, now we have. Oh, we have to do a quick review.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, we have to do this, though. Rabbit, rabbit, rabbit. It's first day of the month that weren't on the air, so. December 2nd. Holy hell. No more November, Tom.

[Josh Arnold]

We're in the thick of it.

[Christy Lee]

Ah, mortgages do, by the way.

[Tom Griswold]

Yep. I'm not sure if I heard this or not. You know that great song.

[Christy Lee]

September by Earth, Wind and Fire.

[Tom Griswold]

Is there a version of that that's December?

[Chick McGee]

I don't think so.

[Tom Griswold]

I was listening to this Christmas channel.

[Chick McGee]

What's more possible, you misheard it or.

[Tom Griswold]

No, that's why my question. Could be a remix. Did they do a new one?

[Christy Lee]

Could be a remix. I don't have the.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, 25th of December.

[Chick McGee]

It could be the AI earth, wind and Fire.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, Yep. That's taking our jobs in four months.

[Pat Godwin]

Boom.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm getting a little tired of AI with every single story. There's a new lube developed by AI Great.

[Chick McGee]

They had a headline on the news.

[Josh Arnold]

That AI Lube is quite and it.

[Chick McGee]

Said AI helps you with your coupons or something. I saw that and I read it. It as AL helps you with your coupon.

[Tom Griswold]

That's another thing I'm pissed about.

[Chick McGee]

You can call me who Al is. Yeah.

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

We're coming right back on this Thanksgiving morning. More about Thanksgiving spending and the friendsgiving is coming up. But next, Augie Smith, comedian, talks Thanksgiving next on the Bob and Tom show.

[Chick McGee]

Bob and Tom.

[Christy Lee]

Tito's handmade vodka is America's favorite vodka for a reason. From the first legal distillery in Texas, Tito's is six times distilled till it's just right and naturally gluten free, making it a high quality spirit that mixes with just about anything from the smoothest martinis to the best bloody Marys. Tito's is known for giving back, teaming up with non profits to serve its communities and do good for dogs. Make your next cocktail with Tito's, distilled and bottled by 5th Generation Inc. Austin, Texas. 40% alcohol by volume. Savor responsibly.

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

Good morning, Happy Thanksgiving. This is Christopher in the Bob and Tom studios. And welcome back to the Best of the Bob and Tom Show. Comedian Augie Spring Smith talks Thanksgiving. In this segment we're joined by Augie Smith.

[Tom Griswold]

Great comedian. Augie was on our first Comedy Central special. Augie is a stand up guy and a stand up comedian and a dad kind of in my realm. What an older gent that happens to be a father. You, you're even digging deeper than I am. You have a two year old, I.

[Ace Cosby]

Have a two year old. And here's, here's the thing, you guys wouldn't know this, but I look, looking at me, but I am a good dad. I have no doubt people say that. They say that I'm a good dad. And you know what? That's based on Facebook photos. That is the entire basis of Augie Smith is a good father. Cause here's the thing about me, I still live in a house with my children. My children live in my house and I live there with them. And sometimes my children get hungry and so I give them Food because they can't get it on their own. And then I take a picture of that, and I put it on the Internet, and people say, oh, my God, that is the most active father I've ever seen. Because the expectations have been lowered so much for men and what we're supposed to do, that just doing the job makes you the world's greatest dad. Sometimes my kids need to go places, and they don't have a license because they're young. So I drive them and I take a picture of it, and people say, oh, my God, this guy is amazing. What he has with his children, this bond, and there's a reason for that. And it's an unheralded hero of America, and I'd like to pour one out for them today. And that's the deadbeat dad. The fact. Deadbeat dad, not only did you create most of the women I had sex with in my 20s, but the fact that you took off on your family made me doing the bare minimum look positively heroic. Deadbeat dad. You ran so that I could walk.

[Josh Arnold]

Thank you very much.

[Chick McGee]

Huzzah. Huzzah. Bravo.

[Tom Griswold]

Pat, do you have a. You're a very fine father. We all know that. And you're. You're an older dad, too. Yeah. Handsome young son.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, he's 12. He was 12 yesterday.

[Christy Lee]

Jim.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, he's DNA test handsome. Yes, he is. I got one of those, too.

[Chick McGee]

That is handsome.

[Tom Griswold]

At least I know. I'm trying to remember is. Don't you have a.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, I don't have them for Thanksgiving for the first time ever. And I'm just a little down about it. No. So I express myself through my instrument, and when I'm done with it, I.

[Tom Griswold]

Pick up the acoustic guitar.

[Josh Arnold]

This is called Single Dad Thanksgiving.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, nice.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm all alone without my son this Thanksgiving.

[Tom Griswold]

Maybe next year they'll be healing and.

[Chick McGee]

Forgiving.

[Tom Griswold]

But I won't spend it moping.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm going to Poncho's, the only restaurant open. I'm having dinner at a Mexican place. Single dad Thanksgiving. Have a few margaritas and drunk text the ex. Enjoy that turkey.com. your new boyfriend. I'm eating Tex Mex.

[Tom Griswold]

Next week.

[Josh Arnold]

I go to court. My ex esposa wants mucho support. Having dinner at a Mexican place. Single dad Thanksgiving.

[Chick McGee]

O.

[Josh Arnold]

So, Pancho cerveza.

[Chick McGee]

Poor favor.

[Tom Griswold]

God's heart is what alcohol is for.

[Josh Arnold]

I have a tequila and make a.

[Tom Griswold]

Turkey with my hand.

[Josh Arnold]

It's just me and the mariachi band. Looks like I'm headed for trouble. The Single dad is singing double. I'm having dinner at a Mexican place. No chi cheese in my face. I'm having dinner at a Mexican place.

[Tom Griswold]

Single dad Thanksgiving. Cha, cha, cha. Do they do a turkey taco?

[Josh Arnold]

Maybe.

[Tom Griswold]

Boy, that's great, Pat. Right now we head back over to the news desk with Christy Lee.

[Christy Lee]

The Transportation Security Administration has issued its guidance for which holiday foods travelers can take on airplanes this Thanksgiving. Here are the following items you can carry through TSA checkpoints. Ready?

[Chick McGee]

These are. You can carry.

[Christy Lee]

You can. Baked goods.

[Chick McGee]

Sure.

[Christy Lee]

Meats, either frozen, cooked, or uncooked stuffing.

[Tom Griswold]

So someone's gonna take, like, a cooked turkey on a plane, maybe, and.

[Josh Arnold]

Or a frozen turkey.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, that's cool.

[Ace Cosby]

Do you expect them to check it?

[Christy Lee]

You put that on your lap. What you do with that? Casseroles, Mac and cheese, fresh fruits and vegetables, candy and spices. The TSA advised, though, if you can spill it, spread it, spray it, pump it, or pour it. And it's larger than 3.4 ounces. It should be carefully packed in checked luggage.

[Tom Griswold]

Augie.

[Josh Arnold]

So no. Ready Whip.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I know. Well, everybody's got a quarter shot of gravy.

[Ace Cosby]

Checks full of cranberries.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Checked food items do include cranberry sauce, either homemade or canned gravy, wine, champagne, sparkling cider, canned fruits and vegetables, preserves, jams, jellies, and maple syrup.

[Josh Arnold]

Jams and jellies.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Huh.

[Tom Griswold]

Didn't we have.

[Chick McGee]

You know what. The difference between jam and jelly.

[Tom Griswold]

You know what?

[Christy Lee]

We're not going there.

[Tom Griswold]

I can't.

[Chick McGee]

Jelly as much. Mic up your butt. Never mind.

[Tom Griswold]

Interesting. I. Isn't traveling by plane for Thanksgiving, just. You don't have to bring food.

[Christy Lee]

I would think you could get it once you got there. Yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

That's just. That's too much work. And didn't we have a guy last week. I'm trying to remember this. That had a gun in a chicken and he got. Remember this?

[Christy Lee]

Was it a guy or a girl?

[Tom Griswold]

Got caught a TN psa. Going through. Yeah. Going through the.

[Christy Lee]

I thought it was a woman. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

That would be.

[Chick McGee]

Raise your arms. Okay. Stand aside, sir. Looks like you got a gun.

[Christy Lee]

She was taking the chicken. It was the fact that there was a gun in it.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Although it would be pretty funny if they. You can. You can. You can keep the gun, sir, but we're gonna have to confiscate that chicken.

[Ace Cosby]

Why did he cross the road? None of your business.

[Chick McGee]

And you know, that was the original. Original lion and the Godfather. Take the gun, keep the chicken. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

TSA says a Traveler attempted to bring a gun onto a plane by hiding it inside a raw chicken at the Fort Lauderdale, slash, Hollywood International Airport two weeks ago.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Don't do that.

[Ace Cosby]

No, it's genius. It's genius, I tell you.

[Tom Griswold]

Really?

[Ace Cosby]

Who's gonna check your chicken? Nobody. Nobody looks in a chicken.

[Tom Griswold]

That sounds like a kid's book. Who's gonna check your chicken?

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

Careful when choosing the titles. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Who's gonna check is close to choke.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Al Jackson]

Okay.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Christy Lee]

Speaking of food and food advocacy group.

[Josh Arnold]

You messed up that word there, Christine.

[Christy Lee]

I know.

[Josh Arnold]

Meant to say advocacy.

[Christy Lee]

Advocacy.

[Josh Arnold]

But you real. It was embarrassing.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I know.

[Tom Griswold]

You know you can.

[Ace Cosby]

And I believe it's fode.

[Christy Lee]

I don't care. They have a new slogan, make beans sexy. The initiative aims to promote beans is quote, unique solution to the climate, health, and economic challenges facing our planet. Rich in protein and iron, beans are a cheap alternative to meat and could help provide nutrition to help people in areas experiencing famine. The advocacy group highlights that the legumes release 90% fewer greenhouse gases than animal proteins while also improving soil health.

[Josh Arnold]

What a broad idea.

[Tom Griswold]

But they also release gases in human beings that are rather embarrassing and not sexy.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, no, that's not. Augie, do you like this sound?

[Ace Cosby]

It's not bad.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, it's funny, right?

[Ace Cosby]

It is a funny sound.

[Chick McGee]

This is why we get all the big awards.

[Christy Lee]

It's moist and horrible.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, that end is real. Real something. That third act is a terrific.

[Tom Griswold]

That last one requires laundry.

[Ace Cosby]

That's where the twist is.

[Christy Lee]

Paul Newnham, the organizers.

[Ace Cosby]

So they're gonna make beans more sexy.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Ace Cosby]

Than they already are.

[Christy Lee]

Said. How can we tackle the clothes climate crisis? Beans is how we do it. Make beans.

[Tom Griswold]

I love that song. Beans is how we do it. They're gonna have to get the hottest of hot people to.

[Chick McGee]

All right, well, advocate. Let's start the list.

[Christy Lee]

As Josh pointed out yesterday, they couldn't.

[Josh Arnold]

Make Ann Margaret sexy.

[Tom Griswold]

And.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I mean, she was already. The beans certainly didn't help.

[Tom Griswold]

That cover always creeped me out. And then they've got the one with a giant deodorant stick.

[Josh Arnold]

Who were weirdos. Yeah, I know.

[Tom Griswold]

They're great.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, I think they're great, too, but many greats are weirdos.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, the only difference, the only thing sexy about beans, I think, is the old flicking the bean, wink, wink. Hey, Christy.

[Christy Lee]

Whoa.

[Josh Arnold]

He felt the wink, wink wasn't enough.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Hey, Christy.

[Josh Arnold]

I do.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, the wink saved you. Tom.

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

Good job coming back on this Thanksgiving morning, A gravy fountain is featured and friendsgiving and Thanksgiving. It's all next here on the Bob and Tom Show.

[Tom Griswold]

November is heating up for U.S. soccer.

[Chick McGee]

United States need to be a little more nasty. Make international friends for the men.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, Callum, that was nasty. And a Black Friday friendly for the women.

[Chick McGee]

Expectations have always been here for this team. We understand that.

[Tom Griswold]

Listen anywhere on the go with the Westwood One sports app.

[Al Jackson]

And for behind the scenes stories, catch.

[Tom Griswold]

The U.S. soccer Podcast. Boy, do we have an episode for you.

[Al Jackson]

Follow and listen on your favorite platform.

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

It's the Bob and Tom show from the Bob and Tom Studios. This is Christopher speaking. Hope you're having a good Thanksgiving morning. This segment features a gravy fountain plus friendsgiving and Thanksgiving.

[Tom Griswold]

Christy Lee once again at the news desk. What's going on, Lily?

[Christy Lee]

This will help with your hunger pains. Food and Wine magazine has released a series of Thanksgiving day recipes specifically designed to be used with a so called gravy fountain.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Josh, are you okay? Josh?

[Chick McGee]

Josh, are you gonna. We're talking about gravy. Gravy fountains. You're gonna feel. You're feeling.

[Tom Griswold]

Guy passed out.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, my God. He fainted. Tommy fainted.

[Ace Cosby]

He's out. He's all the way out.

[Chick McGee]

Somebody. Somebody wave a pastrami sandwich under his nose.

[Tom Griswold]

Give him a bathing suit.

[Josh Arnold]

I blacked out. What happened?

[Chick McGee]

Give him a baby.

[Ace Cosby]

Josh, we were talking about a gravy fountain. Oh, he's gone again.

[Christy Lee]

The magazine encourages readers to repurpose a tabletop chocolate fountain and fill it with gravy. Recipe developer John Summerell has created a gravy. Has created a gravy recipe specifically adapted for a fountain, making it thinner to ensure the machinery does not get clogged.

[Josh Arnold]

Nope, I don't like thin gravy.

[Christy Lee]

Summerl also shared recipes for items you could dip into the fountain of gravery. Gravery gravy, including.

[Josh Arnold]

I have a medal of gravery.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, Josh, how dare you mock this brilliant invention.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm not mocking a gravy fountain.

[Christy Lee]

What would you put in your gravy fountain?

[Ace Cosby]

Cornbread on a stick.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, that's good. That's not even on here.

[Ace Cosby]

Fried mashed potato ball. I'd put in there.

[Christy Lee]

Fried mashed potato croquettes is on here.

[Josh Arnold]

What wouldn't I put in?

[Christy Lee]

Brussels sprouts, butternut squash and sweet potato skewers are on the list. Turkey quote unquote French dip sliders.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, geez.

[Ace Cosby]

Incredible.

[Christy Lee]

So where does the stuff bites?

[Tom Griswold]

So at Thanksgiving, do you have this thing sitting in the middle of the table like a fondue?

[Christy Lee]

I would think.

[Chick McGee]

No, they hold it in the kitchen. They hide it. Of course. It's in the middle of the table.

[Tom Griswold]

Who's got room for a gravy fountain?

[Josh Arnold]

Well, you just get rid of the olive tray or whatever.

[Tom Griswold]

Does this come with a cardiologist? Honestly?

[Chick McGee]

Well, because, you know, if you eat something that at least bit high calories, you'll have a heart attack right there.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm sorry, Josh. I know that you think I'm mocking you by suggesting that you love the idea of a gravy fountain, but Josh admitted. When I was asking Josh earlier about if he had a gravy boat, he referred to it as a yacht.

[Josh Arnold]

That's right. The what? SS Savory is what it's called.

[Ace Cosby]

Yeah. I would have gone naval ship route.

[Al Jackson]

Yeah, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

It's more of an aircraft carrier.

[Ace Cosby]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Where do you.

[Ace Cosby]

Luxury vehicle.

[Chick McGee]

Where do you keep that boat?

[Josh Arnold]

On the end table next to my.

[Chick McGee]

Bed up there on. Don't you have some property right there by your.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, that's right. Well, I, you know, I winter in Cheddar Bay, so it's usually there the first time.

[Chick McGee]

The first time he told me that, you know, not like now and I'm all tired of him, but that first time. Oh, man, it was funny. Boy, oh boy, that was really worth.

[Josh Arnold]

It that first time. You're still chasing the dragon, but the gravy fountain.

[Christy Lee]

Yep.

[Tom Griswold]

Aren't the. Wasn't it determined that those chocolate fountains are just full of bacteria?

[Chick McGee]

There we go.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, they are.

[Chick McGee]

There it is.

[Christy Lee]

I'm. I don't. Yeah, probably. I mean, think about how they test clean.

[Tom Griswold]

You got a little Billy up there throwing his boogers in them.

[Al Jackson]

Oh, great.

[Chick McGee]

Wow. Little Billy up there putting his boogers in it.

[Ace Cosby]

I would love to just a private chocolate fountain.

[Christy Lee]

Like the next time you can buy one of those little ones. If I'm sitting in a tabletop model.

[Ace Cosby]

It can't be for me. I don't want to own anything I don't get to use every day. I just want to have it. Like if I'm at a hotel and I got like the two bed situation, I have one bed. That's my sleeping bed and the other bed's my chocolate fountain bed. Yeah, it'd be fun.

[Chick McGee]

Really?

[Josh Arnold]

I don't like any. I don't like food fountains. I'll just be. I'll be honest.

[Pat Godwin]

Really?

[Josh Arnold]

Not for me.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but you do like those guns that shoot hot dogs? Bugs, right? Love.

[Josh Arnold]

I mean, those are hilarious.

[Tom Griswold]

Like a cake cannon.

[Josh Arnold]

A cake cannon I've not seen, but I am open to the idea that.

[Tom Griswold]

We could get one made for you.

[Josh Arnold]

It's gotta fall apart by the time.

[Tom Griswold]

At halftime of the game, you're out there and Josh Arnold show we have a special bazooka. It's going to shoot out of nowhere.

[Ace Cosby]

It's not a bazooka.

[Josh Arnold]

Go ahead and open your mouth there, Josh.

[Chick McGee]

If you're shooting cake, I think the key is wrapping the cake.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. There's got to be something.

[Tom Griswold]

Cupcakes.

[Ace Cosby]

It's already got the rest. You load in the cupcakes.

[Tom Griswold]

The first time I saw one of those things shooting hot dogs. Oh, this would never happen in the Soviet Union. This isn't. This is only in America. God bless America. We have guns that shoot hot dogs. Take that, you commies.

[Christy Lee]

They still do that?

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Yep.

[Ace Cosby]

Is there a bun on the hot dogs?

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, they're wrapped. They're wrapped in foil.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, it'd be great if there wasn't that when they mustard. It looks like we have a splitter.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, well, somebody got the bun.

[Tom Griswold]

Somebody got the dog.

[Josh Arnold]

Let's get these two together.

[Tom Griswold]

Shortstop got the bun.

[Chick McGee]

You know, that's how life is sometimes.

[Tom Griswold]

The second baseman right there by the picture mount. I'm sorry. Green gravy. A gravy fountain. I saw that this morning and I thought, you've got to be joking.

[Christy Lee]

Well, it's in food and wine. What do you expect?

[Josh Arnold]

I also like giblet gravy. So I don't know that the chunks of.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, they wouldn't make it.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, they had to thin the gravy. I'm with you, Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And that's the best thing about Thanksgiving, the gravy.

[Christy Lee]

Do you make your own gravy? That's hard to do.

[Ace Cosby]

Sam makes gravy.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, that's right. I forget you have something.

[Tom Griswold]

I will admit there are certain things I cheat on. I prefer I go to our friends. I go to our friends Peter and Kathleen for the. That special. Special sweet potato casserole.

[Christy Lee]

Casserole.

[Tom Griswold]

And then you can get there. So they have some pre made gravy.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, they do.

[Ace Cosby]

They have really good stuffing there. The best stuff.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Oh, it's all good. That's okay for Thanksgiving.

[Christy Lee]

Peter, if you're listening, I'm gonna be calling you later today.

[Tom Griswold]

You don't have to do it yourself. Josh, have you determined where you're going.

[Josh Arnold]

To be on Thanksgiving on Thanksgiving Day? I think at my house because my family would be getting together. Some of my family be getting together that Saturday.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, so you're going to be.

[Christy Lee]

Do do you want to come to my place? I'm having Thanksgiving. You're welcome.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, thank you.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Josh Arnold]

Wow, that was.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, that's depressing.

[Christy Lee]

I don't want you to be by yourself.

[Josh Arnold]

No, no, no, I may not. Last year I had it with Godwin. You know what?

[Chick McGee]

Maybe he prefers being by himself as opposed to other. Just.

[Tom Griswold]

Just you and Pat.

[Josh Arnold]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

Some bandages, alcohol to prepare the wrist before the cutting.

[Josh Arnold]

Alcohol for me. Alcohol for the wrist.

[Christy Lee]

So it was you.

[Josh Arnold]

We had a fine time. I made the whole schmear. I made the turkey there, the stuffing, the homemade mashed potatoes, the sweet potatoes.

[Ace Cosby]

Wait, you made it for them?

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Ace Cosby]

You went to them?

[Josh Arnold]

I had a full meal.

[Ace Cosby]

You cooked Thanksgiving for Pat?

[Josh Arnold]

No. Yeah, and then I had just you and Pat across the street and Jenna's son and Jimmy.

[Al Jackson]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Where'd you eat it, at your house or his?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, we ate it in my booth. You know, as you guys know, I have a dining booth.

[Ace Cosby]

Oh, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

It's fun at the booth.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

And then what else do we. We had bottled soda, I think, like a real fancy glass.

[Tom Griswold]

Coca Cola. Bottled soda.

[Josh Arnold]

That's right. Oh, dude, it was. Yeah, that's right. It was the glass. Mexico.

[Jimmy Pardo]

We didn't even pay for it.

[Josh Arnold]

No, I stole it from.

[Tom Griswold]

Locked. You stole it from here? Is the booth locked in position or do the chairs scoot out?

[Chick McGee]

Because there's so many much. There's so much action when you're eating, Josh, that. That the table and the booth are going to slide all over the kitchen. You're going to get pinned in there.

[Josh Arnold]

It's locked in position. No, no, I've eaten myself stuck.

[Tom Griswold]

Is that what you want to hear?

[Chick McGee]

The fire department had to come to get Jimmy out.

[Josh Arnold]

It's kind of like when you take your shoes off on an airplane and then you're going to try to put them back on. Your feet have sort of swollen or whatever. That's what happens to me every time I eat at my.

[Chick McGee]

Boo. Every time.

[Josh Arnold]

Son of a bitch.

[Ace Cosby]

Is that what.

[Chick McGee]

What you.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, did you make a full size turkey?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, it was full size.

[Christy Lee]

What do you think? He made just the breast.

[Josh Arnold]

I knew there'd be two of us, so I had a 28 pounder.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, boy.

[Josh Arnold]

Now where they get a turkey with four drumsticks?

[Tom Griswold]

Is that possible?

[Josh Arnold]

You have a mutant back there?

[Ace Cosby]

Crazy mutant turkey?

[Josh Arnold]

Please. One that runs on all fours.

[Tom Griswold]

Give me a troble turkey.

[Christy Lee]

Josh.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

You look great. You're very handsome to him.

[Josh Arnold]

Thank you. No, no, it's.

[Tom Griswold]

That's. That's that's fun. Glad you guys.

[Christy Lee]

You're mean.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I was just.

[Josh Arnold]

Wait, wait.

[Tom Griswold]

Lot. A lot of leftovers, obviously.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, yeah, it was a fun. I had a good week of leftovers.

[Ace Cosby]

Are you getting us those pies this. This year for Thanksgiving?

[Tom Griswold]

I actually made some of the phone calls on Friday.

[Ace Cosby]

Nice.

[Tom Griswold]

For the. Our pie lady.

[Josh Arnold]

Isn't that just one phone call?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, yeah, it's. It's one.

[Christy Lee]

No. So Pat, it's not because he has to call Amy to call Amy. Have Amy call the pilot.

[Tom Griswold]

That's the first phone call.

[Josh Arnold]

Wouldn't you like to see Amy's medicine cabinet?

[Chick McGee]

I bet it's full before she takes her medicine. She's all shaky.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Does she wake up like this? It looks like a coal miner's medicine cabinet.

[Tom Griswold]

She hears a phone ring. Also, we're part of a.

[Chick McGee]

You're part of something. Something.

[Tom Griswold]

All right. Have you heard of this thing, the friends giving?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, sure.

[Tom Griswold]

It's a pre Thanksgiving thing in which you, a bunch of friends get together and do Thanksgiving.

[Josh Arnold]

It can also happen on Thanksgiving for.

[Christy Lee]

People that don't have a place to go.

[Tom Griswold]

So we have to get some pies, cookies for that.

[Chick McGee]

What a mess you are.

[Ace Cosby]

Also, can I stop finding about family things that I'm not invited to?

[Christy Lee]

It's a friends thing. It's not family friends giving.

[Tom Griswold]

Not even going.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay, well, no, it's a friend's thing.

[Chick McGee]

No. Why would you go?

[Tom Griswold]

It's honest. It's not a school night.

[Chick McGee]

I'm not going.

[Tom Griswold]

It's not a school night. I'm not.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, gotcha.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm sure you can go with Kelly. She'd love to have someone with her. Oh, look at Kelly's new boyfriend. That guy's handsome. Oh, that's. Oh, that's.

[Chick McGee]

That's weird.

[Josh Arnold]

This got really weird in here. I always thought he was gay.

[Tom Griswold]

So did he. Well, it's been a weird show today. If you're.

[Ace Cosby]

This is.

[Tom Griswold]

If you're new to the show. I'm sorry.

[Josh Arnold]

Did your dad ever seriously walk up to you at any point willing go. You know, if you want to come out, it's all right.

[Ace Cosby]

My first kiss was on a school trip. And then after my math teacher told my dad, and then my dad looks at my math teacher and goes, this guy kissed a girl. Come on. I was getting worried about it. And they high five. I had no clue what to do.

[Josh Arnold]

That was a joke.

[Ace Cosby]

I had no clue what to do.

[Tom Griswold]

True story. Now is your mom gonna have thanks giving somewhere?

[Al Jackson]

No.

[Josh Arnold]

She is. Yeah, her and her husband are gonna.

[Chick McGee]

Have anywhere they want because he's this entire.

[Tom Griswold]

I blame. I blame myself.

[Chick McGee]

Your mother's rich, right?

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, no, no, no. There's a misunderstanding here. Chick. She's married to a man named Rich. He's not actually rich.

[Ace Cosby]

And Chick, do you know. Do you know that that bit, an audience member yelled that at Josh during.

[Josh Arnold]

Our shows in Bloomington two weeks ago. Did you know that? An audience member yells that at me every show? I do.

[Tom Griswold]

Your mom's rich for no reason. Fail to get a laugh every time.

[Josh Arnold]

No, no. It gets a good percentage of the audience. For those who don't know the bit, it's baffling.

[Chick McGee]

But you don't want to talk to them.

[Al Jackson]

That you're.

[Chick McGee]

People like Tom. You don't want to suffer. Never mind.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, let's. Let's move forward.

[Josh Arnold]

No, but they're having it down in Florida because they're both having a surgery done near Thanksgiving.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, this could be tragic.

[Josh Arnold]

Not going to be able to trap.

[Tom Griswold]

They're exchanging genitalia. What's happening?

[Josh Arnold]

That's right.

[Tom Griswold]

You know what, why don't we trade?

[Josh Arnold]

Let's see how they this. I'd like to be behind every once in a while.

[Ace Cosby]

Let's do a Freaky Friday thing.

[Chick McGee]

Tom, has anyone ever told you you're horrible at small talk? Has anybody said that?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, Kelly was telling me that this week.

[Chick McGee]

Good lord.

[Christy Lee]

Telling you terrible at small talk.

[Tom Griswold]

And my. One of my daughters. And I'm going. Do you realize that I am a paid professional when it comes to small talk?

[Chick McGee]

What a mess.

[Tom Griswold]

She's got my. My 8 year olds now on her.

[Christy Lee]

Her side, and rightly so.

[Ace Cosby]

I mean, to be fair.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, she can reason.

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

She can see you're going to run.

[Christy Lee]

There's. There's going to be a time when you run out of being able to make more kids.

[Ace Cosby]

And I'm pretty sure at this point you're medically nuts. I'm pretty sure you're not just full blown crazy.

[Chick McGee]

I think he's right.

[Tom Griswold]

That's good.

[Chick McGee]

That's good.

[Pat Godwin]

Dismissed.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm happy.

[Chick McGee]

I'm happy.

[Tom Griswold]

And Christy Lee is giving me the look over there.

[Christy Lee]

No, I'm just.

[Tom Griswold]

Navy Federal Credit Union.

[Christy Lee]

A lot of hot rubbers about to hit the black market.

[Chick McGee]

Hot rubber.

[Christy Lee]

Ontario Provincial Police looking for at least two suspects.

[Josh Arnold]

Hot rubbers here.

[Tom Griswold]

Get your hot rubbers.

[Christy Lee]

Who early Friday morning, broke into a rural property roughly two hours west of Toronto and stole a truck containing some $90,000 worth of condoms and accessories.

[Chick McGee]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

I saw this was a big Story. No.

[Christy Lee]

Was it?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. You know they're bringing in to hunt for them, don't you?

[Christy Lee]

You know what?

[Josh Arnold]

Sure. Naturally.

[Al Jackson]

Mag.

[Tom Griswold]

See, it's condom joke. Ace Magnum. Get it? Okay. You buy the Magnum by the case.

[Josh Arnold]

I think that's a. A gross assumption. You use Magnums.

[Tom Griswold]

He's mentioned that on the air.

[Chick McGee]

Stereotypical.

[Tom Griswold]

No, Ace is mentioned on the air.

[Chick McGee]

I don't believe you.

[Tom Griswold]

Sorry. Well, how does he prove it to you?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. You want him to?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

You know, I take it out and press it against that glass just enough to win. You're in prison and your lover can't wait.

[Chick McGee]

That's. That's. That's the punchline. Take just enough out to win.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I love. And Ace doesn't even have to stand up to do it. That's. That's the scary part.

[Josh Arnold]

He just whistles and it slithers out of his.

[Tom Griswold]

So they. So they stole.

[Christy Lee]

Hey fell $90,000 for the condoms and accessories. Accessories. I guess. Accessories. What would that be?

[Chick McGee]

Lube.

[Christy Lee]

What is it?

[Josh Arnold]

Spermicide?

[Ace Cosby]

Earrings.

[Tom Griswold]

A woman earrings.

[Chick McGee]

I think it's cute. You're acting like you don't know what they're talking about.

[Christy Lee]

I don't.

[Josh Arnold]

Christy, have you ever put a condom on a man?

[Christy Lee]

Nope.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh. You ever put one on a banana?

[Josh Arnold]

Do you wanna. You've never actually put it on the gun?

[Tom Griswold]

Ever put it on a watermelon? Could we move on? Does it say what brand they were?

[Christy Lee]

No, don't.

[Tom Griswold]

Because if they were Trojans. Just look for a really big horse. Look at him. Look at him.

[Ace Cosby]

Is the joke there that Trojan ships in the horses?

[Tom Griswold]

The famous Trojan horse.

[Chick McGee]

Sure.

[Tom Griswold]

Isn't that. Shouldn't they have that display at drugstores?

[Christy Lee]

Are we on the horse?

[Tom Griswold]

You walk in, there's this huge horse.

[Josh Arnold]

Shouldn't Trojan horse be the Magnum of Trojan?

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, there's a new Trojan.

[Josh Arnold]

Trojan horse. Those of you who are hung like.

[Tom Griswold]

And coming soon. The Trojan donkey.

[Christy Lee]

This guy's not hung like a horse. A man in Holland had to undergo penis reconstructive surgery.

[Josh Arnold]

My.

[Christy Lee]

After being bitten by a cobra. The man suffered what is known is as scrotal necrosis.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh no.

[Tom Griswold]

That means the flesh is dying. Exactly.

[Christy Lee]

Testicles were bitten by a cobra. That's right. Doctors in the Netherlands wrote in a case report that while vacationing conditioning in South Africa, the 47 year old was going to the bathroom.

[Chick McGee]

Oh.

[Christy Lee]

When a snooted cobra snake struck from the toilet and bit his genitals.

[Tom Griswold]

I think it's snouted.

[Josh Arnold]

I am a co. Is it snouted would be.

[Chick McGee]

I like to know who I'm going to buy.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. So this guy sits down in the toilet.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

And the cobra comes out of there.

[Christy Lee]

And came out of the toilet, bit him on the testicle.

[Tom Griswold]

Horrifying.

[Christy Lee]

Man was taken by helicopter to the nearest trauma center. He received eight doses of snake BO venom, antiserum, a tetanus shot, antibiotics, and was treated for an acute kidney injury. A urologist surgically removed the damaged tissue before the patient was repatriated to the Netherlands, where a plastic surgeon removed even more dead tissue and performed a skin graft. Harvested from the groin, the man was discharged about two weeks after surgery and has since made a full recovery.

[Josh Arnold]

My balls are better.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[Christy Lee]

The incident was detailed in urology. Case reports where doctors are. Doctors wrote, quote, our take home message. Always flush the toilet before sitting down. In countries notorious for their snake population.

[Josh Arnold]

This happened to a woman. I know.

[Ace Cosby]

Really?

[Josh Arnold]

She was actually sitting on the toilet. She was changing her. Her tampa.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm not trying to be gross, but that's what was happening. She was bit by a snake. Cotton mouth.

[Tom Griswold]

I enjoyed that very much.

[Chick McGee]

You're the one I agree with Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Wholehearted.

[Ace Cosby]

The punchline didn't matter.

[Josh Arnold]

I could just watch you tell that joke forever.

[Tom Griswold]

I could see it arrived. I can see it arrive at your brain. You're going, okay, I'm gonna get this.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, yeah. I'll figure this out.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, Somewhere. We're gonna land on this. That's terrifying.

[Josh Arnold]

Tampons.

[Christy Lee]

Yes. This is one of your biggest nightmares.

[Tom Griswold]

And it's always in Australia or in this case, South Africa.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Where the snakes are.

[Tom Griswold]

But I mean, do they swim up the pipes?

[Josh Arnold]

Sure.

[Tom Griswold]

You would think, oh, I would hover. I would never sit down.

[Jimmy Pardo]

You know what?

[Ace Cosby]

I'm going to say this. I'm never going to go there. I'm never going to go to Australia or South Africa.

[Tom Griswold]

I'd like. I'd love to go to BO.

[Ace Cosby]

I will limit myself from those experiences. I will go other places. I'm never going to go there. I swear by it right now.

[Christy Lee]

I did this yesterday. I thought it was a piece of dog hair or lint on the kitchen floor. And I went to grab it and I went down and picked it up and it was a spot spider and it went.

[Josh Arnold]

Just a crazy.

[Tom Griswold]

Would have been a much better story if you'd been plucking a boyfriend.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, I was trimming my bush and it turns out it was all daddy long legs. That's hell.

[Chick McGee]

Exactly.

[Al Jackson]

There you go.

[Chick McGee]

Now you gotta.

[Tom Griswold]

I love the fact that these doctors going, our take home message always flush before you sit down. In countries notorious for their snake.

[Christy Lee]

Well, that makes good sense.

[Al Jackson]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

Jeez, that's scary. Cobras are huge.

[Tom Griswold]

Huge.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, they're really big.

[Tom Griswold]

Do they have a rhyme for that one?

[Christy Lee]

A rhyme?

[Tom Griswold]

No. If it's brown, flush it down.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, if it's a cobra, cover your snake, Pee in the lake.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, they have a saying.

[Josh Arnold]

It's not a rhyme.

[Tom Griswold]

If it's a cobra, cover your nuts. That's a hybridizer T shirt.

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

We're coming right back on this Thanksgiving morning. We're going to talk money, money you spend on Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving, it's next here on the Bob and Tom show. This is the Bob and Tom show and this is Christopher in the Bob and Tom studios. It's the best of the Bob and Tom show. We're doing all Thanksgiving this morning. This segment features the money you might spend on Thanksgiving.

[Tom Griswold]

There's a, there's certain news stories that come by every year. For example, on tax day, I don't know why they do it with digital now. There's always some poor reporter who has to stand at the post office on tax night and some sad loser comes in, here's my return. You know, they intervene. Hard working guy that's busted his ass to make money all year, now he has to ship it off to the government. Right? But there are these stories every year and sometimes they kind of bug me. The one that's bugging me this year and I've heard three or four different news outlets do this, it's your Thanksgiving is going to cost more than you this year. Your turkey's 26.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I saw that story.

[Tom Griswold]

This is. It pisses me off.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Because look, Thanksgiving, be happy for all the great stuff we have. My God, if it's gonna cost you an extra two bucks for your turkey, you don't like it, move overseas. Okay. There are a lot of, there are a lot of places where if they had a turkey a year, they'd be happy.

[Josh Arnold]

But look, I don't think this is consumers complaining. I think it's news trying to create new.

[Tom Griswold]

It's just every year that thing about. And the 12 days of Christmas this year, if I, I just can't stand it.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, how much? The actual 12 days of Christmas, like.

[Christy Lee]

Someone would ever buy that anyway.

[Tom Griswold]

But the one about the turkeys, if your turkey's a little more this year, hey, thank you.

[Christy Lee]

It's worth it.

[Tom Griswold]

You, you, thank you. Thank your lucky stars that you're doing okay and you can Have a nice turkey dinner.

[Josh Arnold]

Just know that that extra $2 goes to the turkey's family. Isn't that nice?

[Tom Griswold]

And I'll tell you what, it'll never happen. I, you know, when you're 18, you realize you're never going to make it in pro baseball. And when you're my age, realize I'm never going to be president. But if I was, I wouldn't, I wouldn't pardon the turkey.

[Ace Cosby]

Why did you think you were going to be president? Up to this point, you've never tried to be in politics.

[Christy Lee]

Expensive Thanksgiving, first of all, like many.

[Chick McGee]

Like many presidents, job to the most important job in the world.

[Tom Griswold]

It's been pretty close recently. I wouldn't. This thing of forgiving the turkey every year. No, it's typical government double think. You can't have it both ways. They show the president forgiving the turkey, then the next day he's sitting there eating a turkey, right? That's not right. I'd be president. I'd take an ax in front of the kids and everybody cut its head off.

[Josh Arnold]

Hey, America, watch this crack.

[Chick McGee]

Well, you know, how this started, you know how this started was that PETA, you know, said, hey, can, can we, you know, bring attention to millions of turkeys being killed every year? And if we didn't have Thanksgiving, turkeys would be wild in the streets right now. You guys know that. They'd be, they'd be hijacking cars. You couldn't go outside. Thank God for Thanksgiving, I say.

[Tom Griswold]

And we have PETA news coming up.

[Chick McGee]

Yes, we do.

[Tom Griswold]

But anyway, I just. If.

[Christy Lee]

Here's the lead story. 2021 Thanksgiving dinner could be the most expensive in history.

[Chick McGee]

Okay, well, it's 2021. Everything's the most expensive in history, right?

[Tom Griswold]

They're missing the, they're missing the point of Thanksgiving. It's like these people who are canceling Halloween, they don't get it. They just say, this is the devil. No, no, no. It's kids having fun dressing up, okay? Lighten up. Eat a piece of candy.

[Christy Lee]

Did you bring some candy in?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, God, if I got a lot of candy.

[Josh Arnold]

So I brought all my love.

[Tom Griswold]

By the way, this is one real quick thing and I'll shut up. But last night in the middle of trick or treating, we went back to my own house, all right? Where Kelly was passing out candy. So my, my 5 year old and 8 year old went and you know, trick or treated. Trick or treated. And, and, and they loved it at their own house. Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

That is not allowed.

[Tom Griswold]

And then they were going, sweet Then they were going, can we have two? No. And I'm going. You realize you're going to get all of this if no more kids.

[Chick McGee]

She let you be alone with your children out of. Out in the wild.

[Josh Arnold]

That's really not unless or insisted all of you out.

[Tom Griswold]

Usually they all go together, but there was a. A complication. So she was passing out the kid.

[Chick McGee]

Speaking of baseball, which we were. PETA wants to see pitchers warm up in something other than the bullpen. They take exception with the name bullpen. Anybody? Anybody want to. Let's start the guessing. And if you've seen the story, don't guess. I don't, but go ahead and get bullpen, Bullpen, Bullpen instead of bull pen.

[Josh Arnold]

I do know what they're suggesting and I, I kind of like it.

[Chick McGee]

It's. It's the funniest thing. And believe me, I've been in comedy in quotes a long time.

[Tom Griswold]

They don't want to go with like warm up track or something.

[Christy Lee]

I was going to say that, like warm up area.

[Chick McGee]

PETA wants a bullpen to be called an arm barn.

[Tom Griswold]

That sounds like. That sounds like a place that sells devices for you, say, people who have sadly lost an arm.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Al Jackson]

Hey.

[Tom Griswold]

This week at the arm barn.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, the finest in prosthetics.

[Tom Griswold]

Arm bar.

[Chick McGee]

Opening a soon leg barn.

[Tom Griswold]

I would think that Pete would be more upset about, I don't know, maybe the leather gloves start there.

[Chick McGee]

The groom.

[Josh Arnold]

They are upset about him, I'm sure.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah, the group. Did Pete ever picket Rawlings or anything over there?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, probably. No probably.

[Tom Griswold]

They have great public relations. They really know how to get publicity, though.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah, they agree. Peter released a statement saying words matter and baseball's bullpen devalue talented players and mock the misery of sensitive animals.

[Josh Arnold]

You know, Peter, words do matter. Why are you named after a breaded pocket? That meat sure tastes good.

[Chick McGee]

Peter said the name given to the area where relief pitchers warm up before entering a game refers to the holding area where terrified bulls are kept before slaughter.

[Tom Griswold]

Look. Yes.

[Chick McGee]

Tom with his hand raised.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm not sure if you know this chick, but coming up in the news.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I know.

[Tom Griswold]

We have a new story where the Bulls win. I love those stories.

[Josh Arnold]

And I like steak.

[Chick McGee]

All right, Bull. Giving it to the man.

[Tom Griswold]

Do you think anyone who's a member of PETO has watched a baseball game this year?

[Al Jackson]

Absolutely.

[Pat Godwin]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Feeling there's a fair amount of hypocrisy. I mean, they do some good work. It's just this stuff is so silly.

[Tom Griswold]

Doesn't arm barn sound like a chicken wings place.

[Christy Lee]

I don't even understand it. Arm barn.

[Josh Arnold]

You got to loosen up your arm.

[Chick McGee]

You got to loosen up.

[Christy Lee]

It's not a barn.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, they want to stick with the pen. As in bull pen.

[Christy Lee]

I think arm pen, then armpit, then.

[Tom Griswold]

It sounds like after he. After the hobo law lost his arm in a tragic train hop, we. We let him become a writer by installing an arm pen.

[Josh Arnold]

God, when I think you're right, man. Armpit. Armpit all the way.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I like.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, he's in the armpits.

[Tom Griswold]

Warming up in the armpit.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, that's a deep drive to left. Oh, it's out of here. Lands in the armpit.

[Christy Lee]

That makes more sense. Yeah, it's funny than the arm barn.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I do.

[Ace Cosby]

The armbar is kind of cool. If you were hanging out with the toughest guy and he, like, had, you know, big arms. He was a workout kind of guy. He's like, I gotta see ya. Gotta head to the arm bar.

[Tom Griswold]

Eric, no legs.

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

That's cool.

[Chick McGee]

Exactly.

[Tom Griswold]

Josh, did you not famously have a. An observation about a store that had the word barn in the name?

[Josh Arnold]

Yes. Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

What was that again?

[Josh Arnold]

Well, I got in trouble on a date once because I. We were shopping and I asked the girl if she wanted to go into Lane Bryant, and she punched me. And then after reminded me that that is a store for plus size women.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I didn't know that. Lane Bryant.

[Josh Arnold]

I actually big ladies realized that either, because Lane Bryant doesn't sound like a fat girl store. Dress Barn. I thought that was the fat crest.

[Chick McGee]

Barn is a bad name.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Right.

[Chick McGee]

And they're very successful.

[Christy Lee]

Yes. And they're not. They have all sizes.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, yeah, sure. But are they agriculturally themed fashions or.

[Josh Arnold]

No, no, they're not.

[Christy Lee]

No, they're not.

[Tom Griswold]

You don't walk in. They don't have, like, corrals to go change your clothes.

[Chick McGee]

They don't have to dress up in, like, cowboy hats and big belt.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, bossy, we got one that'll fit you. Come on over here.

[Chick McGee]

Welcome to dress barn.

[Josh Arnold]

40% off gingham.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, we got Griswold up in the arm barn.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Sponsored by.

[Chick McGee]

By dress bar.

[Tom Griswold]

But see, Peter wisely chew. They choose a time when people kind of focused on baseball with the World Series, and they come up.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Renaming the bullpen.

[Chick McGee]

So I'm surprised there haven't been more. What do I want to say about the Atlanta Braves and the.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, that's not their. That's not their particular focus. And then that. That Got a lot of attention over the weekend. The cheer.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, the chop.

[Tom Griswold]

Tomahawk chop.

[Josh Arnold]

That's. We've seen.

[Al Jackson]

We're.

[Josh Arnold]

We're seeing the near end of that, sure.

[Chick McGee]

Well, the Astros are named after George Jetson's dog. I think everybody knows that.

[Josh Arnold]

And dogs with speech impediments up in arms.

[Tom Griswold]

You ever been to one of those PETA meetings?

[Christy Lee]

I have not.

[Tom Griswold]

Man, this place was so crowded, you couldn't swing a dead cat without hitting somebody.

[Josh Arnold]

I swear, Tom, that's so funny. If you ever vote, everybody, whatever reason, speak at a PETA function.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, don't encourage him.

[Chick McGee]

The president will stand up and go, all right. Point to the door.

[Josh Arnold]

People crying.

[Chick McGee]

That's not funny.

[Tom Griswold]

Cats are friends.

[Chick McGee]

A 55 year old man died after being gored at a bull running event in the eastern Spanish town town of Anda. Anda. Anda. O N D A.

[Josh Arnold]

You know what he got?

[Tom Griswold]

Cord on the balls.

[Chick McGee]

Possibly the perum.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay. I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't feel sorry for these guys. I'm sorry.

[Chick McGee]

The man was repeatedly attacked by the bull at Fe de Festival. Suffering a head wound.

[Christy Lee]

Ah.

[Chick McGee]

And having an artery punctured in his left thigh.

[Tom Griswold]

You know why he was out there in the street when the bull bulls were let loose. They warn you in Spanish and everything.

[Christy Lee]

That'Ll take you out. You hit that one.

[Chick McGee]

He died at a hospital in the nearby town of Villarreal.

[Christy Lee]

How quick do you bleed out? It's in like minutes.

[Chick McGee]

Ten minutes, I think.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I think you're right on.

[Chick McGee]

The council said it had canceled all bull running events in the town's festival, but other activities would go ahead. It was the first fatality of its kind since similar events resumed in Spain. I've never been to never mind following.

[Christy Lee]

Kind of like the music, though, don't you?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, a relaxation of that. See, that's why I said never mind. Covid restrictions over the summer. They didn't want to get the bulls sick. I. I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

How old was this guy?

[Chick McGee]

55. Double nickel, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Old enough to know.

[Christy Lee]

Right, Right.

[Al Jackson]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Stay away from the.

[Tom Griswold]

Once you hit 50, you can't keep up with your dog, okay?

[Josh Arnold]

Let.

[Tom Griswold]

Let alone a bull. So midlife.

[Chick McGee]

Midlife crisis.

[Al Jackson]

Maybe.

[Tom Griswold]

Maybe run with the bull. Big macho thing.

[Christy Lee]

Anyway, we know somebody that's done it. I mean, it's. It's a thing.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, well, every couple years some idiot gets killed, and I guess that's part of the appeal.

[Chick McGee]

When you wear a flak jacket or something, just in case that's not gonna.

[Tom Griswold]

Help you if you get the old.

[Chick McGee]

In the.

[Tom Griswold]

In the horn. In the groin.

[Christy Lee]

That's true.

[Josh Arnold]

We did have a story of a guy getting horned in the perineum.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah. Remember that?

[Chick McGee]

Tanked. It was almost as if the bull knew.

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

Where's the worst spot I can get?

[Christy Lee]

I don't think that's the worst spot.

[Tom Griswold]

No.

[Josh Arnold]

What do you think? Up in the old.

[Christy Lee]

Don't you think that would be worse?

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, I think the old. I mean, if it. If it went into an existing orifice, it's not going to be as painful as if it cuts its own.

[Christy Lee]

I don't know.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know. I'm. I'm with Tom on this. I think. I think in between is worse because you kind of get both, so.

[Chick McGee]

So technically, it would be pleasurable for existing order.

[Josh Arnold]

That's exactly right.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh.

[Josh Arnold]

I mean, it's conical. Sort of.

[Chick McGee]

So if you had to choose where you were gored.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm choosing B hole rather than tank.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I'm with you on that one.

[Josh Arnold]

Both are gonna be terrible, but I'm choosing that one.

[Tom Griswold]

Any other radio show would put up a poll. We are not going.

[Josh Arnold]

I mean, at least the. At least the. The back end has a pilot hole now.

[Christy Lee]

Starting point.

[Tom Griswold]

Right.

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

We shall return on this Thanksgiving morning. Some listener letters and Jimmy Pardo on the way. Next. Razzle dazzle and an early Thanksgiving. Welcome back and happy Thanksgiving. This is Christopher in the Bob and Tom studios. And welcome back to the Best of the Bob and Tom Show. Do it all Thanksgiving this morning. A little razzle dazzle coming up next. And an early Thanksgiving. Let's find out.

[Chick McGee]

I like that early. I like that Sunday morning game and I like it.

[Tom Griswold]

I'd be very curious to know if those early Sunday games are affecting church attendance.

[Chick McGee]

Absolutely.

[Christy Lee]

What city you live in? Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

What time zone? That's really early. If you're in California.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah.

[Ace Cosby]

6:30.

[Chick McGee]

I bet they're having a bra. No, early pancakes.

[Christy Lee]

Bloody marriage.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, yeah. You know, like Christy does for the coronation or a wedding.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, absolutely.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, well.

[Chick McGee]

Remember her pajama?

[Josh Arnold]

The early game.

[Tom Griswold]

The early game. If you would. If you slept in, you would have slept in. Watching it. So snooze fest. One touchdown. Yikes.

[Chick McGee]

You don't.

[Christy Lee]

Maybe it was a defensive battle.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, it was. And it was.

[Tom Griswold]

I want to see true.

[Chick McGee]

True NFL fans.

[Tom Griswold]

I want to see no score.

[Pat Godwin]

Enjoyed the game.

[Christy Lee]

Right. No matter what.

[Chick McGee]

Sure. He doesn't. Here's my invitation to Bill Belichick. What am I doing?

[Tom Griswold]

Tom Looking at plays.

[Chick McGee]

That's all he did.

[Tom Griswold]

All.

[Chick McGee]

Every time they took a shot of him, he's looking at papers on the sideline.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, it was confusing. They were all in German.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, that's the thing.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, no wonder.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. And once again, I. I know it's not the same. Somebody sent me an email and said it's not the same national anthem that they used before in Germany. But it's still a little creepy.

[Tom Griswold]

The language, it's kind of a guttural. So interesting that it's. It's so close to. So close to the beautiful mellifluous language of France. But no, it's a lot different. Yes siree.

[Chick McGee]

Well, you know what happened on Saturday at the halftime. The Michigan. Penn State game. Michigan beats their butt. Wasn't talking to you. And welcome back. And Matt Leinert said, razzle dazzle. Chris. Misty. Oh, now you've infected the college game time.

[Josh Arnold]

Santa Claus says it in a wayfair commercial.

[Chick McGee]

Is that right?

[Josh Arnold]

Because I like a house. Little razzle dazzle.

[Chick McGee]

Have you seen the John Travolta Santa Claus?

[Josh Arnold]

I like it.

[Chick McGee]

I love them. Yeah, he's walking around a Santa.

[Tom Griswold]

All right.

[Christy Lee]

Did something happen over the weekend where everybody put their Christmas lights on?

[Chick McGee]

He dances as Santa Claus.

[Christy Lee]

Have you noticed you have your Christmas lights on on already?

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, wow.

[Tom Griswold]

I know it's against the rules.

[Chick McGee]

I thought you said you put them up and you weren't going to turn.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, getting to turn off seems to be a technical issue.

[Josh Arnold]

Technically, everybody else in his house wants them on.

[Tom Griswold]

That's the technical.

[Chick McGee]

Exactly. Let me talk to Josh for a second. How do you have that opinion of yourself? Because you know me, I'm the stuff that's not my fault. I'll. I'll take the blame.

[Tom Griswold]

You know that.

[Chick McGee]

Me too, but he just. This doesn't. It's not me. I. I don't know what's going on with the lights. There's a technical issue.

[Josh Arnold]

We could all learn a little something.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

I think that's what I want to learn. I want to be.

[Tom Griswold]

I missed my calling. I should have gone. Wouldn't have gone into politics.

[Chick McGee]

And then early on, he's playing music just like anything in the background on his board. Well, that wasn't me. The button was on. I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

I gotta have Eddie come in here and fix it. The button was off.

[Chick McGee]

There it is. Buttons off. I hear music.

[Josh Arnold]

What?

[Chick McGee]

What song is that, Pat? I hear music. When no one from Sound of Music. Something, something.

[Tom Griswold]

That's the first sign of A stroke.

[Josh Arnold]

If you're hearing music right now, I smell orange.

[Tom Griswold]

So was. Was Harbaugh on the field?

[Chick McGee]

No. He was at a hockey game Saturday night. The place went crazy in Michigan. It was that Ann harbor. He was watching.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, I mean, obviously, he.

[Chick McGee]

He's not allowed.

[Tom Griswold]

He wasn't surprised that he got suspended. He saw the signals coming.

[Chick McGee]

What's the rule on laughing at your own jokes? What?

[Josh Arnold]

It's a new laugh, too.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, it is a new laugh when.

[Josh Arnold]

Some people do it. It's charming.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. And pretty elaborate cheating scheme they had going. Yeah. So?

[Chick McGee]

Well, it was just like when the Astros got caught. Okay, what did I say?

[Josh Arnold]

Or Nixon?

[Tom Griswold]

You say everyone.

[Josh Arnold]

Everybody did it.

[Chick McGee]

Everybody does.

[Josh Arnold]

They just happen to get.

[Chick McGee]

Why do you think college football, they don't have the talkback system in the helmets like they do in the NFL? Because gamesmanship is a stealing signals. It's as American as apple pie. Cheating on your tax.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, I stole an apple pie over the weekend.

[Chick McGee]

Absolutely.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you?

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah. From a small mom and pop bakery.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. What?

[Josh Arnold]

They had it on, like, to steal for places that feel it.

[Chick McGee]

Really?

[Al Jackson]

Was it on there?

[Tom Griswold]

That makes it more thrilling knowing you're really hurting someone.

[Josh Arnold]

It was cooling on the sill.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

I love it.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, by the way, real quick preview, closed circuit just for the. You folks.

[Chick McGee]

Here we go.

[Tom Griswold]

I had a pie from the pie lady over the weekend. Oh, it was good.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, good.

[Tom Griswold]

Your pie. Your pies are on the way for Thanksgiving.

[Chick McGee]

What's the update? The pies are good.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, delicious.

[Josh Arnold]

Looking forward to it. Thank you.

[Tom Griswold]

Cookies were great. This is the season for pies and cookies.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

They're absolutely delicious.

[Chick McGee]

So now the pies we're going to get this year taste good.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, they're good.

[Chick McGee]

All right, sir. They're always good.

[Christy Lee]

They always taste good.

[Chick McGee]

Well, that was trying to get you.

[Tom Griswold]

Excited about the holidays. Got some great.

[Christy Lee]

I don't understand why everybody's skipping over Thanksgiving.

[Chick McGee]

You're skipping over Thanksgiving and you've said before.

[Christy Lee]

Christmas lights are.

[Chick McGee]

Thanksgiving is one of your favorite holidays.

[Tom Griswold]

We had a pretty Thanksgiving Thanksgiving at my house over the weekend.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah, the friends giving with all your friends.

[Tom Griswold]

It's a Friendsgiving.

[Christy Lee]

We weren't there. We were.

[Tom Griswold]

I believe Josh said it best. It's her friends. Her friends giving.

[Chick McGee]

Her friends giving.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

Why don't you have a Friendsgiving for your friends?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, maybe I'll set it up now that I've learned how to do it. Did you enjoy yourself? It was great. I spent all day Friday and Saturday cleaning and all day Sunday cleaning. It was fun. My house. My house is a island. Been edgewise. Did you talk Great. Yeah, it was fun.

[Josh Arnold]

Good.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Don't you.

[Chick McGee]

Haven't you said you're on record saying that your bathroom looks like a hotel bathroom?

[Pat Godwin]

Like.

[Chick McGee]

Like no one's ever been in there when you leave it, right.

[Tom Griswold]

Nothing on the shelf, nothing on the counter. Everything's in drawers.

[Chick McGee]

Nothing. Nothing. Better than a nice warm home to come home.

[Tom Griswold]

But there's. I do have. I do have a. A soap squirter with a scent free soap in it.

[Chick McGee]

Ah, have you seen the Dawn Power Shop?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, I have those. Love it, man.

[Tom Griswold]

The power.

[Chick McGee]

They squeeze. You got to get these, man.

[Tom Griswold]

I got.

[Chick McGee]

That makes that noise.

[Josh Arnold]

Tom. Did you guys have traditional Thanksgiving food?

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, good.

[Tom Griswold]

That's not what the pies were doing there.

[Christy Lee]

Did you make a turkey?

[Tom Griswold]

A turkey? My son Sam made a delicious turkey and roast beef.

[Chick McGee]

Where are you on the tofurkey?

[Tom Griswold]

Not there.

[Chick McGee]

You don't like the turkey made out of tofu?

[Tom Griswold]

It's perfectly acceptable. It's just not my thing.

[Josh Arnold]

I've actually never tried one, but.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, here's what. You go get one of the sponges in the office and then put it in in turkey gravy and squeeze it out. Then cut it up and eat it.

[Chick McGee]

No, no. So if someone was coming to your house and was a vegetarian and wanted a tofurkey, what would you tell them? Go piss up a rope. Happy Thanksgiving.

[Tom Griswold]

No, if I would, I'd be happy to make them one. I made one several years ago. Years ago, remember? No, I did make one. Yeah, absolutely.

[Chick McGee]

Do you shape it like a turkey?

[Tom Griswold]

No, it came in a thing and we. Yeah, I did, I did. I forgot about that. I did one years ago for someone that wanted that.

[Chick McGee]

That's a bean cur.

[Tom Griswold]

When they were looking, I took. I took real turkey juice, poured it all over the thing so it tastes.

[Chick McGee]

Good.

[Tom Griswold]

And then they seized and vomited.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, them vegetarians get real upset when you.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, I did.

[Chick McGee]

I forgot.

[Tom Griswold]

I did do. I did do do a non meat turkey several years ago.

[Josh Arnold]

I am surprised you're not a turducken guy.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I don't like duck. Sorry.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, ducks.

[Tom Griswold]

We were talking about this off the air. I. The one time I had duck, I told you a friend of mine shot it and it still had buckshot in it. Whatever you call it. I bit down on it and almost broke my tooth.

[Christy Lee]

I don't think that's a good. Not all duck has buckshot in it.

[Tom Griswold]

No, that isn't the reason. The reason was it tastes like it's incredibly greasy. Man.

[Josh Arnold]

I like the duck.

[Chick McGee]

I have very good.

[Tom Griswold]

I wish I like goose, cuz that'd be a good reason to slaughter all the geese.

[Christy Lee]

I could take you to a restaurant and you could have the duck bolognese and you would change your mind in a heartbeat. It's so good.

[Pat Godwin]

Good.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, maybe so good.

[Chick McGee]

Have you had the duck Bo. So good. Really? Enjoy for two, please.

[Al Jackson]

Of course.

[Christy Lee]

That's right.

[Chick McGee]

Who wants to hear the NFL enjoy German?

[Al Jackson]

Me.

[Chick McGee]

Here's Jonathan Taylor's touchdown yesterday.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, good.

[Chick McGee]

From Frankfurt. Yeah, I. I'm.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm with you.

[Chick McGee]

I keep.

[Tom Griswold]

I keep getting into Dr. Strange Love.

[Josh Arnold]

I start hiding in the basement.

[Chick McGee]

I'm not saying we're not going to get our hair must.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm saying a little halftime show lighting designed by Alber Spear. Inside the Third Reich. Joke. Anybody?

[Chick McGee]

Hey. One more time.

[Tom Griswold]

Sorry.

[Chick McGee]

One more time.

[Ace Cosby]

Ready?

[Al Jackson]

Colts.

[Tom Griswold]

Sex drive for the Colts. Well, nice.

[Chick McGee]

I heard sex drive and touchdown in German. Is touchdown in English.

[Tom Griswold]

And they only. They only got to say touchdown once.

[Chick McGee]

What would have pleased you? 42, 41.

[Tom Griswold]

Gardner Minshew. Five touchdowns. That'd be nice. He could run for one of them.

[Josh Arnold]

I bet it's really weird when there's a blitz.

[Tom Griswold]

Awkward.

[Josh Arnold]

It's got to be scary.

[Tom Griswold]

Very awkward.

[Josh Arnold]

Same word.

[Chick McGee]

It wasn't our idea to have a game in Germany, was it? We just need to point it out. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Good crowd.

[Chick McGee]

It was a good crowd. We're singing. They were singing Take Me Home Country Road.

[Josh Arnold]

I heard that.

[Tom Griswold]

That part.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Mountain mama. And they have the. They have the words up on the scoreboard.

[Tom Griswold]

It went crazy.

[Chick McGee]

They went nuts for it.

[Tom Griswold]

Not clear that either team is not from West Virginia, apparently.

[Josh Arnold]

Almost.

[Tom Griswold]

Geography would be nice. But John Denver, by the way, just. Just to confuse them. Yeah. The Patriots flew to Poland. John Denver's German.

[Josh Arnold]

Just Chick.

[Tom Griswold]

Chick pointed out John Denver's real name is like Deutsche Land. Right. Chick?

[Chick McGee]

Deutschland.

[Tom Griswold]

Deutsche Land Hammer or something.

[Chick McGee]

I want to get back accidentally flying a pole.

[Tom Griswold]

Is that where it all started? Yeah. You don't want to use that. The GPS from 1939. Very confusing.

[Chick McGee]

And I'm going to do it this way. One of my best friends is Polish. But my point is, is that where it all started? About Poland? Because they really didn't put up a fight when they came in and just. All right, here. Here you go. Take our country, right?

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, not at all. The polls were very brave. I think it was the. I think many of the jokes I Think Came from certain television shows in the 60s.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, that's how Cleveland started. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

The whole Cleveland thing with Goulardi and white socks and bowling. Oh, yeah, that was a big thing. If you wore white Song. If you wear white. White socks. To my junior high school.

[Chick McGee]

No good.

[Tom Griswold]

My friend John Higgins would come up to. He was huge. He'd come up to you, grab your ankles and lift you off the ground. Do you fell on your head. He thought that was hilarious. White socks.

[Chick McGee]

Sounds like polo.

[Josh Arnold]

Sounds like a real prick.

[Chick McGee]

Leave anyone quadriplegic?

[Pat Godwin]

Practically.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. I'm totally serious. He would walk up to you. Especially because I was, you know, a quarter his size. He'd walk up if you had. If you wore white socks.

[Christy Lee]

So apparently this happened to you.

[Tom Griswold]

Of course. Anybody. You could not wear white socks.

[Chick McGee]

So it was up to you.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm not kidding. You had to wear. You had to wear darker socks.

[Christy Lee]

According to him. You had to wear.

[Tom Griswold]

No, it was kind of a thing citywide.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Chick McGee]

Citywide.

[Tom Griswold]

He would go. He would go. He'd come up to you and go, pollock. Grab your ankles and pick you up.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. It sounds like a real winner.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Now he's a very distinguished bailiff.

[Christy Lee]

Supreme court justice.

[Tom Griswold]

He can give you a hell of a deal on a car.

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

We're coming right back with one of our faves. It's comedian Jimmy Parker. And he is next. Happy Thanksgiving. This is the Bob and Tom show. This is the Bob and Tom show. Welcome back on this Thursday morning Thanksgiving. This is Christopher in the Bob and Tom studios. One of our faves, comedian Jimmy Pardo in studio.

[Chick McGee]

Tom, as I live and breathe, we have a comedy legend, Bob and Tom, comedy legend in the studio. Studio.

[Tom Griswold]

My top ten live shows of all time includes this guy, Mr. Jimmy Pardo, comedian. Hey, Jimmy, how are you?

[Jimmy Pardo]

Good morning. Every time I come, that number seems to go higher. It used to be top three, then it was top five. Now it's top ten.

[Chick McGee]

Who?

[Jimmy Pardo]

How many? First of all, I know you don't go out to a lot of shows.

[Tom Griswold]

I've only been to nine.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Yeah. How do I keep my top?

[Tom Griswold]

I get.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I keep getting bumped down. It's hurtful. Every time I come here. I'm gonna go see my friends. Top 25 shows.

[Chick McGee]

Yes, sir.

[Jimmy Pardo]

He's a. In my top 10. 32 shows. That's very specific.

[Tom Griswold]

Jimmy Pardo was our guest. Mr. Parter, how's your life going? Everything cool?

[Jimmy Pardo]

Everything's cool.

[Chick McGee]

Good.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I got. You guys were. Before we got on the air, you were talking about the.

[Tom Griswold]

The.

[Jimmy Pardo]

The Hot rock and roll band, Rush reuniting.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I got my ticket, and at one point, I was 48,000 in line. You know how they give you that little.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah. When you're in the.

[Jimmy Pardo]

How many ticket people before you? 48,000 people were before me.

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

Whoa.

[Jimmy Pardo]

And I waited it up out. Josh, got my seat. That's it. No humor. I'm just letting you know I got my ticket.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm glad you got it.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I'm bragging. That's really just my way of which.

[Christy Lee]

You got great seats, didn't you?

[Jimmy Pardo]

Well, you know What? When there's 48,000 ahead of you, it's kind of like my show in St. Louis.

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

Come on out.

[Jimmy Pardo]

There's 48,000 seats available. Plenty of seats available in St. Louis. I don't even know if that's true. I could be sold out in all these. I'm not. I've started doing these midweek shows because I can't stand doing shows for drunkards on the weekends. I do Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursdays. And I was like, I love that. I'm home on the weekend. I don't have to do anything, you know, else is. Everybody's home during the week. Nobody wants to come out to see comedy during the week. So this. This was an error, Josh. This. This midweek tour thing has been just a disaster.

[Josh Arnold]

But you tried it.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I'm not doing Saturdays. I'm busy. I gotta go see Rush. I got a decent seat. I ended up getting a decent seat.

[Tom Griswold]

Are you going by yourself?

[Jimmy Pardo]

I, like. I go to all the shows alone. My son is now off at college, so I don't have my contract concert buddy, and my wife can't stand classic rock, so I go by myself. And then I. I don't want to go with anybody that I. I gotta worry if they're having a good time. I go alone, and I show up when I want to, I leave when I want to, and I don't have to worry if the person next to me is like, I hope they're enjoying.

[Christy Lee]

That's great.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Subdivisions.

[Tom Griswold]

I couldn't agree more. And we. I was mentioning the. The fact that the. Rush tends to have a largely male audience.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Yeah, you want to know what a bigger one. Michael Shanker. Go see Michael Shanker. You won't see a woman for miles.

[Tom Griswold]

Or go see Liza Minnelli.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Well, sir, that's hurtful. Josh, fun fact, and you pick any number between one and 50. How many times has James R. Parto Jr. Seen Liza Minnelli in concert?

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, six twice.

[Tom Griswold]

I say.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Well, that's fun. That Fun ended at 6.

[Tom Griswold]

All right.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Nobody's ever been spot on before. Well, that's. That was disappointing. What a let down, that lottery. Give us a call. 591-rock-501-road. Let us know. Josh, right or wrong. God bless.

[Christy Lee]

I love your T shirt, by the way. I'm a big Jesus Christ Superstar fan.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Thank you. I just saw a superstar at the Hollywood Bowl.

[Christy Lee]

Did you?

[Jimmy Pardo]

With Cynthia Aro. Aro played Jesus and Adam Lambert played Judas.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, that didn't cause controversy.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Well, luckily it was Los Angeles, Josh, so.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, true. Yeah. Yeah.

[Jimmy Pardo]

There were still some people that were confused. Well, that. But that's a lady. That's a lady. Why a lady playing Jesus? Why is the gay man playing Judas?

[Tom Griswold]

What's happening?

[Jimmy Pardo]

I don't know if I can leave my trailer.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, it.

[Jimmy Pardo]

It was wonderful. They're very. It was amazing. It's my second favorite musical.

[Christy Lee]

I love it.

[Josh Arnold]

I love it, too.

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

Oh, my God.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I love it. Absolutely love it.

[Tom Griswold]

And what's your favorite?

[Christy Lee]

Neely man.

[Pat Godwin]

Who?

[Christy Lee]

Ted Neely.

[Josh Arnold]

Great.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Ted Neely. Who's my height.

[Chick McGee]

Is he.

[Jimmy Pardo]

He's a tiny man.

[Tom Griswold]

Jesus, Ted Neely. Didn't he play the original Broadway production? And isn't he still doing it?

[Jimmy Pardo]

Yeah, he's not doing it. He tours and does the sing alongs. When they showed the movie at the.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, and that.

[Jimmy Pardo]

That's where I met him. I just recently met Ted Ne.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, cool.

[Jimmy Pardo]

And. And I insisted. We went back to back because I got to see how tall he was. And so he's. He comes in at 5, 4. He's a tiny man.

[Christy Lee]

You don't think he shrunk over the years?

[Chick McGee]

He may.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Well, we all get shorter as we get older, and, you know, I think 10. Like a. He's got a Dorian Gray situation going on. He's been alive for ever, 150 years. Tommy, you think Ted Ne's a V.

[Chick McGee]

Tell them your thoughts.

[Tom Griswold]

Who did we see doing? We saw Sebastian.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, God.

[Tom Griswold]

Sebastian Bach, the rock star.

[Chick McGee]

We all ended up at that together.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Who did he.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, that's right. Peter was.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, Bob's brother was in it.

[Tom Griswold]

He was Judas. He was amazing.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Oh, I imagine he was great. And you're telling me that Sebastian did not do a good job in the lead role of Jesus Christ?

[Tom Griswold]

I was in the audience and I said, I hope they crucifies him. They crucify plan before the. The immuner mission so I can go home.

[Chick McGee]

And Tom meant to say that in a hush tone, but he Didn't.

[Al Jackson]

Oh.

[Chick McGee]

Everyone around us heard him. Yeah. And we all laughed. It was a good line.

[Jimmy Pardo]

It's a good line if, yeah, Sebastian's a bad, you know, bad is a good guy.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I have a question. Yeah, this is a two parter.

[Al Jackson]

Part one.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Part one, yes or no. Did you buy that shirt at that production?

[Jimmy Pardo]

No, I did not. Bought it on cheap public dot com. Use promotion code Pardo.

[Tom Griswold]

Question two.

[Ace Cosby]

By the way.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I don't know if that's accurate.

[Tom Griswold]

Question two, did you wear that to the show?

[Jimmy Pardo]

Yeah, that part I did do.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Okay.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I bought the shirt for, to wear there. I, I like to, I, I know that some, some Jeremy Piven movie said don't wear the band's shirt. Where else would you wear it?

[Josh Arnold]

I know, I don't agree with it at all. You're exactly right.

[Jimmy Pardo]

You can't wear your, you know, I don't know, Def Leppard shirts. The Def Leppard show then where Josh.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Def Leppard shirt have both sleeves. What do you think?

[Jimmy Pardo]

Just the one.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Jimmy Pardo]

That's all you need.

[Chick McGee]

Somebody wrote online the other day, if you're, if you play air drums with both hands and Def Leppard, you're a jerk.

[Jimmy Pardo]

You just throw it in the guy's face.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Right.

[Chick McGee]

It's rude.

[Tom Griswold]

These are all good points.

[Al Jackson]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

We were talking about the wearing a T shirt to the shirt to the, to the show. Is that cool or not?

[Josh Arnold]

And I rarely do it, but I think it's completely acceptable.

[Christy Lee]

I think it's accept. I think.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Yeah, of course it is. I, I repeat, then where else?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I don't do it because I don't have a lot of rocks.

[Christy Lee]

You see people.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Well, I understand that, yes, outside going shopping. Yes. Anywhere else. But when you, but if somebody's making fun of you, like, oh, what are you doing with your scorpion shirt under the Scorpion show? I'm, I'm seeing the Scorpion.

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I, I, I don't know. I bought a shirt in 87. I want to have a reason to put it on, you know.

[Chick McGee]

Right.

[Josh Arnold]

The concerts to going are good. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

The movie that it's from is pcu.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

What is that? What is that about?

[Josh Arnold]

It was kind of a backlash against then the new politically correct. So it was like PCU was, it was about like these guys who were tired of.

[Chick McGee]

It was about two hours long is what it was.

[Josh Arnold]

Maybe two hours too long.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah. But that's, that's where the whole thing of don't be that guy.

[Josh Arnold]

Right, right.

[Tom Griswold]

Wearing it wearing the band shirt to their concert movie.

[Jimmy Pardo]

So I want to pivot and be crucified halfway through.

[Chick McGee]

I wanted that going in. See what I did?

[Jimmy Pardo]

Yeah, I know. He's. He's not a good guy.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Jimmy Pardo]

How do you like the way I clean that up?

[Tom Griswold]

That was nice.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Real smooth.

[Chick McGee]

Real smooth. Do you.

[Tom Griswold]

Does it. Because you are. You have a great podcast. You've been doing it for a long time.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Almost 20 years now. Coming about 20 years.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but the rules there are different than the rules on radio. So do you have to kind of.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, he cusses like a sailor. On the podcast.

[Tom Griswold]

Do you have to, like when you walk in here? Okay, I'm not. This isn't the podcast. I got to be careful.

[Chick McGee]

I'm a professional.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I had to handle myself out in the real world.

[Tom Griswold]

You should have entertained two weeks ago.

[Jimmy Pardo]

When somebody get a little filthy, somebody run their mouth.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, the guy sitting next to you. Bomb. Yeah. On the.

[Jimmy Pardo]

On the program.

[Al Jackson]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Pardo]

No. And then we say thank you for your time and we send him packing. Right.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Is he done?

[Chick McGee]

You.

[Jimmy Pardo]

You cut him loose there, or do you let him give him another segment? Josh, we.

[Chick McGee]

We voted.

[Josh Arnold]

But Tom lately has not been kicking out people when he should.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Is that right? That's just one of those situations.

[Tom Griswold]

Not at all.

[Josh Arnold]

You know what he did once?

[Jimmy Pardo]

I.

[Josh Arnold]

This was six months ago or so year. We had a guest in here who was bathed in cologne. It was an obnoxious amount.

[Tom Griswold]

We have a rule.

[Josh Arnold]

No cologne in here. I have an allergy. Tom doesn't care for it. This guy Tom. Let him sit in here. I left.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Yeah, you left.

[Josh Arnold]

I had.

[Al Jackson]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

A cast member of the show left.

[Jimmy Pardo]

A regular.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Five days a week.

[Josh Arnold]

So we could have this stranger sitting.

[Tom Griswold]

Here and you can see that show. It's in our top three. We have it.

[Chick McGee]

People loved it.

[Tom Griswold]

It was huge. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

And then, you know, then Tom had the. The nerve after the show. Oh, you're still here. I thought you had to go home for some reason. I would have had just lied to my face.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Now he knew exactly what was going on.

[Chick McGee]

He lies a lot.

[Josh Arnold]

I knew where I stood.

[Christy Lee]

We all know he needed to make that guy leave.

[Josh Arnold]

But at least from then on, I knew where I.

[Chick McGee]

You lie a lot because you just take for granted that we all know you're lying or you think you're getting away with it or what's the scenario? What. What's going on in your head when you lie?

[Tom Griswold]

I'm getting away with it.

[Chick McGee]

You're getting away with.

[Josh Arnold]

So he lies to himself.

[Chick McGee]

Realized. All right.

[Jimmy Pardo]

That's one. Why you left the room that day is beyond me.

[Tom Griswold]

The magic that you bring.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Let me ask a question. Does anybody I know? You guys are all, you know, your friends. You get along well.

[Chick McGee]

Let's not get carried away.

[Tom Griswold]

You're.

[Jimmy Pardo]

You're.

[Josh Arnold]

You work.

[Jimmy Pardo]

You work together.

[Chick McGee]

There you go.

[Jimmy Pardo]

And you're. But you seem to be very honest with each other. Nobody's told Tom about the sideburns. That hasn't come up at all.

[Chick McGee]

He loves.

[Jimmy Pardo]

The chops. Haven't come up at all.

[Chick McGee]

But maybe he cherishes his sideburns. It's the one thing he. He has.

[Christy Lee]

He's.

[Chick McGee]

He's obsessed with the hair on men.

[Al Jackson]

He.

[Chick McGee]

So we let him have the sideburns.

[Josh Arnold]

We don't.

[Al Jackson]

Jimmy.

[Tom Griswold]

Part of.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I'm not saying I just like him. I'm just curious. If it's conversation.

[Chick McGee]

They're full, William. Counselor. You know that.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I don't know what that means. Okay, but I sounded offensive.

[Tom Griswold]

He was the defense attorney for the Chicago 7. We're going way back. And he does pronounce it consular. And if you pronounce.

[Chick McGee]

Of course he does.

[Tom Griswold]

He made a real. He would always say if someone pronounce it William Kunstler. He'd make a real big deal. Know it's consular, so. Which I always found mildly amusing.

[Christy Lee]

About your sideburn.

[Tom Griswold]

What year did. In your growth as a human being? Did the pubes kick in?

[Jimmy Pardo]

Well, I just recently bought those Kardashian panties, so that. So I just got them, I don't know, a week ago for the first time. When did I get the pubes? You're asking. That's a great question.

[Tom Griswold]

I got them real late.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Let's say. I don't. What do you get? 15, 14.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah. Along in there and not.

[Christy Lee]

Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

When did you get senior in high school?

[Jimmy Pardo]

So you're.

[Tom Griswold]

You're.

[Jimmy Pardo]

You're. You're Kendall down there until.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, yeah. Now I cherish each one. Similarly with the sideburns I got. You got to go with them.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Let me ask you a question. It's a follow up on pubes. What. What age were you when you first got crabs? What do you think of that question?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, wait a minute. I can tell you.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, no.

[Christy Lee]

He.

[Chick McGee]

He's the only one in the room that has sexually transmitted disease.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Wait a minute.

[Chick McGee]

But he went to school in. In New York City.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

So. Oh, I got a. On the subway.

[Chick McGee]

God knows how he got into an Ivy League school, but he did his dad went there?

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. Now let's.

[Chick McGee]

That's sad.

[Tom Griswold]

Let's move forward here once again, our guest in the studio, Mr. Jimmy Pardo. Hello.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Hey, let me ask you a question. We're all friends here. At least we work together. Where would you guys. If you're, if you're going to. Let's pretend you're going to a rental car place, right? Put yourself there. Put yourself there at a place that maybe after a fort down in Texas, all right. And they tell you you could pick any midsize size you want or you could pick any full size. You can pick whatever, blah, blah, blah. Where would you put the Nissan Sentra? Where would you guys rank the Nissan Sentra as far as. Would it be a compact?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Would it be a, Would it be a entry level?

[Chick McGee]

Certainly somewhere between a compact and a mid size?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Pardo]

You think it's between that?

[Chick McGee]

I don't think it's a full mid size.

[Jimmy Pardo]

You do think it's a mid size.

[Chick McGee]

I think they will tell you it's a mid size. All right.

[Jimmy Pardo]

And then anybody. Josh, Pat, I insist you.

[Chick McGee]

Pat, you stay out of this.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm not a. I don't even know saying what I'm one looks like, so.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Oh, they got four wheels.

[Josh Arnold]

I figured that metal.

[Christy Lee]

But Santos, I'm not a car guy.

[Josh Arnold]

So I can't tell.

[Christy Lee]

They're a small sedan.

[Josh Arnold]

I'll look it up. I'm like, Josh, I don't know.

[Jimmy Pardo]

You don't know either.

[Tom Griswold]

What do you, what was it?

[Chick McGee]

They.

[Jimmy Pardo]

They call it a midsize. And I, I refuse to believe it.

[Christy Lee]

I think it's a compact.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I think it's a compact. I'm. I got in it and I was like, hey, it's a, it's only got 2,000 miles on it. So it's brand new. And that's why I chose it in the mid sized lane. And. But as I'm driving, I'm like, there's, there's no way this is a midsize.

[Josh Arnold]

Not a bad looking car.

[Christy Lee]

No, it's not.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Well, I'm not buying it, Josh. I'm just gonna zip around in it for a few days. I don't know. If you're going to Cincinnati, St. Louis.

[Christy Lee]

Rapids through that arch is going to go central Ultima. Is it the Ultima after?

[Jimmy Pardo]

Yeah, I think. But I guess the Ultra is sedan.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Okay.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Right. The Ultima rather.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, Yeah. I, I would not, I would think this was a smaller car.

[Jimmy Pardo]

It's a compact. Is anybody from this company Listening to Give Me a Rebate.

[Tom Griswold]

Comedian Jim Pardo. And ladies and gentlemen, a little bit of Marillion. You remember this band? We were talking about Marillion a few minutes ago.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm unfamiliar.

[Tom Griswold]

This is the big hit, right?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

I like it.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Isn't that great?

[Josh Arnold]

Very good.

[Christy Lee]

Long intro. Tom hates it.

[Tom Griswold]

I love. This is a good song we played. We played this a lot.

[Chick McGee]

Get to the lyrics. Come on.

[Josh Arnold]

Why do you have nothing to say?

[Chick McGee]

We got the studio.

[Tom Griswold]

How about now? There we go. You have a Marillion T shirt?

[Jimmy Pardo]

I've got three Marillion T shirts.

[Tom Griswold]

Three?

[Jimmy Pardo]

Sure. I've got the misplaced childhood one. I got just the. I got the original logo, the new logo.

[Tom Griswold]

How many classic rock T shirts do you have?

[Jimmy Pardo]

More than my wife would like me to have in the house. I've got. I don't know, Dig this. I put them in my drawer. I alphabetically.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, okay.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I. I fold them and then in the. That way that. What's that woman's name, please?

[Christy Lee]

Marie Condo.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I fold my shirts the way she recommends.

[Josh Arnold]

What, you got ACDC there when you open it up?

[Jimmy Pardo]

I believe ABBA comes up first.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

I was going to say ocdc.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Hey, that's hurtful to me and my neuroses.

[Tom Griswold]

That's amazing.

[Jimmy Pardo]

And I start. Yeah, start. Did I go this way? Then the other day, one was out of place and now you've got.

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

Got rattled.

[Josh Arnold]

What is Bad Finger doing after Def Leppard?

[Jimmy Pardo]

I think my wife. I think my. Maybe one of my shirts got in with her laundry. We do separate laundries and I think one got in and she kindly folded it and put it away. But she doesn't know. She knows I'm nuts. I don't think she knows I'm alphabetized my shirt nuts until now. She doesn't listen. What am I talking about?

[Tom Griswold]

That's a. That's a new level of nuts.

[Jimmy Pardo]

But. But then I think it makes sense, doesn't it? You know where they're at?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, that makes sense.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Oh, where's my Thompson twins?

[Josh Arnold]

Right?

[Chick McGee]

The tease.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, of course.

[Tom Griswold]

Why don't you put them on hair hangers then so you can just look?

[Jimmy Pardo]

Because then you get those little nibby dobs.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, he's right.

[Jimmy Pardo]

On the. On the. Near the shoulder. I don't know that.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, off the air, you guys were talking about the band Talk Talk.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

And that they have a song called Talk Talk.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

All you do to me is Talk Talk.

[Tom Griswold]

I. One of the most famous ones where the band Is the same as the song.

[Jimmy Pardo]

What's your favorite?

[Tom Griswold]

A Bad Company by Bad Guy.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, that's right.

[Tom Griswold]

That's the one.

[Josh Arnold]

And I don't know that this counts. My favorite would be. If you're going to allow it.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Big Country. I don't think it's should be allowed. Yeah, but I love that song.

[Tom Griswold]

How about the Monkeys theme? Hey, hey, we're the Monkeys.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I think that's a theme song.

[Ace Cosby]

I don't think that's.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I think Bad Company, Night Ranger has one. Night Ranger. Night Ranger. Talk, talk, talk. Iron Maiden's got one.

[Tom Griswold]

Black Sabbath has a song called Black Sabbath.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

Bo Diddley. What?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Is that. Isn't that just called Bo Diddley?

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Well, yeah. In any event would start to move on. We have Jimmy Par.

[Chick McGee]

I guess we put a nice.

[Jimmy Pardo]

We just started.

[Tom Griswold]

I can't think of any more.

[Chick McGee]

I.

[Josh Arnold]

What's your most obscure rock or musical T shirt? Do you think you like Saga?

[Jimmy Pardo]

I do have a saga shirt.

[Tom Griswold]

Nice car.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I've got a Saga World Departure.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Yeah, boy. So I guess that'd be the. There you go.

[Josh Arnold]

Wow.

[Christy Lee]

I.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Maybe I. I would say Marillion gets the most of Kaga. At least like that on the loose got a lot of mtv.

[Tom Griswold]

You have Zeger and Evans. You got Zer and Evans.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I. I don't.

[Tom Griswold]

No. Yeah, you wouldn't.

[Josh Arnold]

Born.

[Chick McGee]

What about the year 2525. What about that.

[Josh Arnold]

About and Garcia?

[Jimmy Pardo]

Sure. I got Pac man fever.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I do not.

[Chick McGee]

That's right.

[Tom Griswold]

Now did you purchase all these. All these T shirts while at these now classic rock concerts?

[Jimmy Pardo]

Most of them are from t public or someplace.

[Josh Arnold]

I gotta look. I need to get some of these like Jump in the saddle. Is that Three Stooges?

[Tom Griswold]

Curly Shuffle guys.

[Josh Arnold]

But no, just Jump in the saddle.

[Chick McGee]

Nothing.

[Josh Arnold]

No mention of Shuffle.

[Jimmy Pardo]

You don't want to do that.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I'm walking you through that.

[Christy Lee]

Do you have any shirts that you bought at a concert?

[Chick McGee]

I do. Sure.

[Jimmy Pardo]

From the 70s and 80s and all that. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

What do you think your oldest concert shirt would be?

[Jimmy Pardo]

Oh, it's got to be Chicago from 81.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I have Chicago. When I bought it originally. It's Chicago Fe 1981.

[Christy Lee]

You could probably sell that for a lot of money.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Yeah, it doesn't fit. It just really takes up places in the seas in my drawer.

[Chick McGee]

See?

[Christy Lee]

There you go.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Yeah, but do I want to sell it? I mean, the answer is yes. I got to get rid of these things.

[Chick McGee]

But no.

[Josh Arnold]

Have you seen the Quilts people make.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, those are cool.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Are they?

[Jimmy Pardo]

Are they kinda.

[Josh Arnold]

I kind of think they are.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Okay, you got. You know what? I'm not gonna lie. The two of you just talked me into it because I thought it was kind of sad and pathetic.

[Tom Griswold]

No, it's cool.

[Jimmy Pardo]

But now I.

[Chick McGee]

All right.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I'm on board.

[Christy Lee]

You can take all those shirts and then line them into one thing.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, you don't.

[Chick McGee]

They don't.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Integrity of the 81 shirt does not fit. 2025, Jimmy.

[Chick McGee]

This is what you people do, though.

[Al Jackson]

You.

[Chick McGee]

Somebody comes in here and they give it to you. Here's what I. And then you try to make it better. And he's fine the way he is. Don't try to make a quilt.

[Tom Griswold]

He was going to throw him away. Don't throw him away.

[Chick McGee]

Throwing them away. Nobody said throw him away.

[Christy Lee]

Say that.

[Jimmy Pardo]

That was another on the table.

[Chick McGee]

You hear voices that no one else does. You need to.

[Tom Griswold]

He said I got to get rid of him.

[Chick McGee]

He just said that.

[Josh Arnold]

He plainly said he was going to throw them in the yard and light them on fire.

[Chick McGee]

We all.

[Jimmy Pardo]

You know what? Fairness.

[Tom Griswold]

That is what I said.

[Jimmy Pardo]

So maybe you're not.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, what's the. Is the first shirt obviously begins with an A. It is what? Aerosmith.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I would say Abba is the first shirt.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. And then what's the last one? Do you have a zebra?

[Jimmy Pardo]

I don't have a zebra shirt. But who's behind the door?

[Chick McGee]

God.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I would say the last would be to use.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, why?

[Josh Arnold]

For.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Yes. Probably a Yes. 90210 shirt. Oh, there's a Wham in there.

[Josh Arnold]

You don't have an Invey Malmsteen.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I don't W in the M's, though.

[Christy Lee]

You don't have a zz.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, you do.

[Josh Arnold]

You don't.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I don't have a CZ Top. I'm not a. I'm not a huge ZZ Top guy.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Wait a minute. Ying Van. Why would he be in the last name?

[Josh Arnold]

He's right.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, last name first for the.

[Chick McGee]

Well, yeah. That's how you.

[Jimmy Pardo]

How do you alphabetize?

[Chick McGee]

You not.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Tom Jones is in the Jays, my man.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, he is right. He's right.

[Tom Griswold]

Nope.

[Jimmy Pardo]

You alphabetize by first name. When you. When you do your albums, you put the. You would put the Tom Jones and the T's.

[Al Jackson]

Not the.

[Tom Griswold]

The J. Yeah, because it's a title.

[Chick McGee]

He is not a title.

[Christy Lee]

That's a name.

[Al Jackson]

He's an author.

[Chick McGee]

No, that's. He's a person.

[Josh Arnold]

Right.

[Jimmy Pardo]

What what record stores do you shop?

[Al Jackson]

At?

[Ace Cosby]

You.

[Jimmy Pardo]

You go run record stores and everything's wrong in here.

[Tom Griswold]

Barry.

[Jimmy Pardo]

Manos and the M's.

[Josh Arnold]

The whole section over changes.

[Jimmy Pardo]

What are you doing?

[Chick McGee]

Why isn't Barry and the bees. What are you guys.

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

We'll wrap things up here in just a minute with some letters and the Thanksgiving zucchini cat casserole. It's next here on the Bob and Tom Show.

[Chick McGee]

Bob and Tom.

[Christopher (Producer/Announcer)]

Hope you're having a great Thanksgiving morning. This is Christopher in the Bob and Tom studios. And this is a Thanksgiving version of the best of the Bob and Tom show. Some listener letters in here and a Thanksgiving zucchini casserole.

[Chick McGee]

Hello, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Hello, Chick Magee. Right now it's time for a letter segment. This first letter, actually. This is something that may or may not happen to everybody. I think. I don't know. Ms. Hooker, I think you'll find this the most interesting. Okay, this comes to us from Andrew. My wife's aunt makes a zucchini casserole every Thanksgiving. It is terrible. My wife will put some on both of our plates even though we can't stand it. But of course, she doesn't want to hurt her aunt's feeding feelings. My aunt thinks we all love it, even though it's the only thing left on our plates. By the way, she always sends us home with some for leftovers. I want to break the news to her every Thanksgiving so she'll quit making it, but my wife won't let me.

[Josh Arnold]

No allergy.

[Tom Griswold]

So what is this?

[Josh Arnold]

Doctor says I don't know what happened. Whatever's in that, I'm allergic to it.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, no, I think just. You just take a. Yes, like a. Something you can ditch it in. When she's not looking, you whip it off and stow it. What is that about?

[Chick McGee]

That seems to be a lot more popular than it used to be. Or that I can remember people giving you food to take home. Here, here, here. Come here. Take this home.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, don't.

[Tom Griswold]

That makes sense. I do that at Thanksgiving because what am I going to do with all this stuff? I'm not a. I don't. I don't. I don't like leftovers anyway. I don't like.

[Jimmy Pardo]

I hate.

[Tom Griswold]

I hate cold pizza.

[Chick McGee]

There's another way to look at it. Look at it like the only child looks at it. That's mine.

[Josh Arnold]

Same here.

[Tom Griswold]

I will make the exception. I do like the. The following day. Spaghetti is actually better. That's been chemically proven. And yeah, turkey. Turkey and mashed potato sandwiches are pretty Good. Yeah, real good.

[Chick McGee]

You like turkey and mashed potato sandwiches and you also like sugar bread.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, I do.

[Chick McGee]

I think you have some wat trash back up and back up in the house. Yeah. You ever try potential potato pancake?

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know what that is.

[Chick McGee]

What do you, you mix it with eggs and mashed potatoes.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I used to do potato pancakes.

[Christy Lee]

And yeah, you just add a little vodka.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Kind of like sour cream and applesauce. Yeah, but I do it in the waffle maker now. The day after Thanksgiving, you put them in the waffle maker.

[Christy Lee]

Oh my gosh.

[Chick McGee]

Some substance.

[Al Jackson]

Oh man.

[Josh Arnold]

A latke with sour cream and applesauce.

[Tom Griswold]

That's amazing.

[Chick McGee]

Remember Latcon Taxi Man?

[Tom Griswold]

That was now. So do you have anything that you like, you're forced to eat or do you have. Maybe some people have an artwork.

[Chick McGee]

I'm sorry, what was the question?

[Tom Griswold]

Some people are given, for example, an artwork.

[Chick McGee]

Did you say some, something you were forced to eat?

[Tom Griswold]

In other words, like in this story, say someone brings the same pie every year. It's a mince pie and you can't stand it. But it's a tradition. You feel forced to eat it. Or if someone gives you a lamp, some mother in law gives you a lamp. And every time, hey, they're coming over. Get the lamp out and put it back. Something horrible.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't ever want. No, I mean I. Thankfully nowhere to live my life. None of that.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

And I'm gonna, I, I can't do it. I won't be able to do it.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

This is gonna be, this is why you're still single?

[Josh Arnold]

I don't know. I don't think that's why. But I, I, I think it's one.

[Tom Griswold]

Of the glories of single. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Food wise. I'll never hurt anyone's feelings.

[Tom Griswold]

I will always taste what someone brings.

[Christy Lee]

I just, it's not worth.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, I'll always try what somebody brings.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But if they load it up.

[Josh Arnold]

But I, but I, I don't know. I feel like I've found ways. If I don't care for it, I'll just go.

[Tom Griswold]

Maybe.

[Josh Arnold]

You know what? Not for me.

[Tom Griswold]

But I think of all people, Ms. Hooker will appreciate this story. My dad's friend, Mr. Berger, great guy.

[Chick McGee]

Chief Justice Warren Burger.

[Tom Griswold]

In any event, he, he had expressed his love of cherry pie to his mother in law who had never made a cherry pie. But to impress him, she brought over a huge cherry pie for Thanksgiving. Yeah, she had made it, it turned out, with maraschino cherries.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh.

[Tom Griswold]

And it. So she gave him a piece of it, and it looked. She didn't know it was mar. It looked amazing. It was this glowing red, so he had to force it down. And then, of course, he said how great it was. She made. She served him up a second.

[Josh Arnold]

That's what he gets. You can be honest.

[Chick McGee]

That's what he gets. Yes. See, I don't. I don't think you can be.

[Josh Arnold]

You can absolutely be honest.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I think you can. I think you can.

[Josh Arnold]

In fact, you could even go, hey, did you use maraschino cherries? Yes, I did. Oh, that's. Normally people just use regular cherries.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

This is. This is inedible. And.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm sure that you're gonna go to the kitchen and tell your daughter. Tell your daughter that I'm not.

[Josh Arnold]

Not worthy of truth. More so than.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, no, they don't.

[Josh Arnold]

I know. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

When you're cooking, I would want to know.

[Christy Lee]

I would hate that.

[Tom Griswold]

If someone lied to me and I made something terrible, and if they.

[Josh Arnold]

If they don't. If they can't handle it, that you don't need them in your life.

[Tom Griswold]

You don't have that option.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, I do.

[Tom Griswold]

You can't go.

[Chick McGee]

Maybe maraschino cherries. Oh, that's why this tastes like.

[Josh Arnold]

What's the worst thing that happens if you piss off an in law? They don't talk to you at the family gatherings. Oh, no.

[Christy Lee]

Don't threaten me with a gathering time.

[Josh Arnold]

I. I've had plenty of family gatherings where certain people don't get along and we just don't talk. It's not a big deal.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Chick McGee]

We'll see.

[Josh Arnold]

It's great.

[Tom Griswold]

Do you have a letter over there?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I do. Dear Bob and Tom show. I know how much Tom hates bald guys with beards, and I don't think that's right.

[Tom Griswold]

It's not true.

[Chick McGee]

I'm the one.

[Tom Griswold]

You're the one.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. But does this help at all if I have the famous wiener mobile behind. Behind me? This is Phil from somewhere.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, that would help, Tom, but since.

[Tom Griswold]

It'S you, because I love the wiener mobile.

[Chick McGee]

I like the winner mobile. I. I don't. I've never been inside the wiener.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I've been inside both of them. Two of them. But I would like to see the new banana mobile that has the seats one in front of the other.

[Christy Lee]

I think we're working on that.

[Tom Griswold]

There we go.

[Chick McGee]

There's a Weenam.

[Tom Griswold]

That's a serious beard, too. That guy looks great. Yeah, that's a Cool look.

[Chick McGee]

That's a. That's a nice beard.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I. I like that. I'm just saying not everybody can put. Pull off the beard and the bald head.

[Josh Arnold]

Did you notice his wardrobe matches his hair philosophy? So he's bald, but he has a long beard. He's wearing shorts, but he's wearing long sleeves.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, he's a man.

[Josh Arnold]

This is a dichotomous man.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, that sounds like. That sounds like a really pretentious movie on Netflix. Some sci fi crap.

[Chick McGee]

Dear Bob and Top Show. I just wanted to say hello. And especially hello, Chick. I am from Springfield, Ohio. I live there. Seemed like a lot longer than you should have. Anyway, I'm a fan of your show. I have Parkinson's disease and I don't sleep well.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Chick McGee]

About every night I listen to the show's replay. It makes me laugh and feel better.

[Al Jackson]

Oh, good.

[Chick McGee]

I turned 71 last week and hope to continue watching the show for some time. I'm a virtual VIP member. All the best to you and wishing you good health. P.S. chick, do you still take your shirt off to have a major transaction?

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah. The answer's got to be yes.

[Chick McGee]

And the answer is yes. If I'm going to really get some work done, the shirt comes off.

[Josh Arnold]

I had a roommate who did the exact same thing.

[Chick McGee]

Well, the ideal transaction. And I don't know if Tom's honest enough.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yes.

[Chick McGee]

Pre shower, when you have a major transaction action, hit the shower. Right.

[Josh Arnold]

The post shower.

[Christy Lee]

Not.

[Tom Griswold]

No, the transaction is pre shower.

[Chick McGee]

Pre shower. You take it.

[Josh Arnold]

You take a post shower, right? Yeah. Post transaction shower.

[Tom Griswold]

But you have. You have the bidet, which. Which as the. As the lady wrote in, removes the peanut butter from the shag carpet, if you will. Oh, God. Oh, my goodness.

[Chick McGee]

That's graphic. Yeah. Dude Wipes is doing a. A new TV commercial about that. It's really graphic without actually saying anything. It's wonderful.

[Tom Griswold]

They have the peanut butter and the shag carpet.

[Chick McGee]

Kind of sort of. Yeah, a little bit. Wow. Well, let's see. Oh, this is interesting. Let's talk about this. Evidently, mannequins in department stores are being brought to our attention because they are now more full figured. That's exactly right. This is from Bill from Mexico. He took a picture. Picture of a mannequin all by herself standing alone in the corner. And there she is.

[Josh Arnold]

Jeez, Ask for days.

[Chick McGee]

Damn, damn, damn, damn. Look at that. Oh, look. And there's two behind her.

[Tom Griswold]

Look.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And that's just. It's a mannequin just from the waist down.

[Christy Lee]

Where is this?

[Chick McGee]

Somewhere in Mexico, he says.

[Christy Lee]

Must be where the weather girls shop.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, yeah, those Mexican meteorologists.

[Chick McGee]

Fellas.

[Tom Griswold]

Big booty.

[Chick McGee]

Do yourself a favor, if it's a slow night, just kick on Univision and check the weather out. That's all.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm telling you, they're all like, Sophia Vergar.

[Tom Griswold]

I'll take Ginger Z any day.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, she's very cute. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Again, you're talking about she's pretty.

[Tom Griswold]

She's really pretty. She's gorgeous.

[Josh Arnold]

A local gal.

[Chick McGee]

ABC weather girl.

[Tom Griswold]

Abc. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Tom had me look her up one.

[Pat Godwin]

Day and I was.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yes, you're right, Tom.

[Chick McGee]

What happened to our other girl? Dylan Dreyer? We used to like her.

[Tom Griswold]

I, I love Dylan Dryer. Remember we were going, she's, she's now a single chick. I think.

[Chick McGee]

What? They just. She just had a baby.

[Tom Griswold]

Isn't she the one that just went single? Maybe I got that wrong.

[Josh Arnold]

Who's the one I used to really have ahead of myself? Willard Scott, when He would wish 100 year old birthday. Oh, man.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, like Smuckers.

[Tom Griswold]

This is the Bottom and Tom Show.

[Christy Lee]

Michael Rosenbaum and Tom Welling take you behind the scenes of one of the.

[Chick McGee]

Greatest shows of all time. Their ultimate Rewatch podcast.

[Tom Griswold]

We're in the midst of season seven.

[Chick McGee]

And obviously we had a very successful television show for 10 years that was Superman based.

[Tom Griswold]

But we had to make everyone believe that you were Clark.

[Chick McGee]

I got to be honest, I was surprised at the end of this episode that I wasn't. I was too.

[Christy Lee]

Talk Phil. The Smallville Rewatch Podcast.

[Chick McGee]

Not sure I knew when I was filming it that I was not me.

[Christy Lee]

Follow and listen on your favorite platform.