The BOB & TOM Show - November 28, 2024

Summary

Podcast Summary: The BOB & TOM Show - November 28, 2024

Hosted by The BOB & TOM Show | Cumulus Podcast Network

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Introduction

The November 28, 2024 episode of The BOB & TOM Show delivered a lively blend of comedy, personal anecdotes, and humorous discussions centered around the Thanksgiving holiday. The hosts, Tom Griswold and Chick McGee, along with co-host Christy Lee and guest comedian Greg Warren, navigated through various comedic segments, personal stories, and light-hearted debates.

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Thanksgiving Preparations and Traditions

Tom Griswold kicked off the episode discussing his plans for a "Friendsgiving," expressing both enthusiasm and a dislike for the term itself.

• [05:20] Tom: "We're having a pre-Thanksgiving Friendsgiving. As much as I love the idea of it and I love doing it, I hate the name."

Chick McGee chimed in with his own Thanksgiving preparations, humorously detailing his obsession with clear ice cubes for his bourbon party.

• [06:19] Tom: "I've got someone in my sphere, if you will, that is a bourbon person...so I made some phone calls."

Christy Lee shared a traditional Thanksgiving song parody about turkeys, adding a creative and comedic touch to the show's atmosphere.

• [02:07] Christy Lee: "Today I'll be a tasty sandwich too."

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Car Cleaning Hacks

Tom introduced his unconventional car cleaning method using a leaf blower, which sparked a fun and spirited debate among the hosts.

• [46:03] Tom: "Take your car out in your driveway, open all the doors, and then use a leaf blower to blow out all the dust and debris."

Chick McGee and Josh Arnold expressed skepticism and offered alternative methods, highlighting the show's dynamic and interactive nature.

• [46:39] Chick: "I have trouble touching microfiber."

• [48:09] Christy Lee: "I don't know why you wouldn't open all the windows."

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Pet Peeves and Hills to Die On

A significant portion of the episode was dedicated to discussing personal pet peeves, referred to as "hills to die on." Topics ranged from frustrations with drive-thru inefficiencies to annoyances with elevator etiquette.

Christy Lee highlighted the annoyance of dealing with shrimp with tails, emphasizing the mess it creates while eating.

• [142:03] Christy: "Why don't they take the tails off and cook with shrimp? I'm not supposed to eat the tail and I gotta squeeze it apart."

Tom Griswold shared his irritation with people who repeatedly press elevator buttons, leading to humorous exchanges about elevator behavior.

• [144:54] Tom: "They keep going, move forward. I don't want to hit the guy in front of."

Chick McGee added to the discussion by pointing out the inefficiency of certain drive-thru practices.

• [152:00] Chick: "She's gotta push the button corresponding to the floor she's going to."

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Comedic Segments and Guest Interactions

Comedian Greg Warren provided additional humor with his "Dimension News Desk" segment, delivering satirical takes on current events.

• [07:27] Greg Warren: "Hey, everybody. How's it going?"

Allie Breen, a stand-up comedian, joined the show to discuss relationship dilemmas submitted by listeners, adding a relatable and comedic element to the episode.

• [22:25] Allie: "Dear Ally, my girlfriend brought her friend home for a threesome..."

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Light-Hearted Banter and Jokes

Throughout the episode, the hosts engaged in playful banter, sharing jokes and humorous observations about everyday situations.

• [09:10] Greg Warren: "If you hated that one, you're really gonna hate this."

• [28:10] Tom Griswold: "Maybe get some donuts and porn and... sit her down."

Chick McGee took a humorous stab at the complexities of relationships and dating dynamics, intertwining personal experiences with comedic flair.

• [25:22] Chick: "He can work a schedule."

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Closing Remarks and Upcoming Segments

As the episode neared its end, the hosts teased upcoming segments, including discussions on hunting, sports updates, and more comedic interactions with guests like Greg Warren.

• [45:34] Ace Cosby: "Coming up next hour on the Bob and Tom show, some Christmas wrapping and weird and dangerous toys."

Tom Griswold wrapped up the show by reiterating the light-hearted nature of the discussions and expressing gratitude towards the listeners.

• [35:31] Christy: "Nobody cares."

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Notable Quotes

• [05:36] Christy Lee: "Here's what we did was pick an arrow."

• [25:22] Chick McGee: "He can work a schedule."

• [142:03] Christy Lee: "Why don't they take the tails off and cook with shrimp?"

• [144:54] Tom Griswold: "They keep going, move forward. I don't want to hit the guy in front of."

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Conclusion

The November 28, 2024 episode of The BOB & TOM Show successfully blended humor with relatable topics, providing listeners with a mix of laughter and light-hearted conversations. From unconventional car cleaning hacks to the shared frustrations of everyday pet peeves, the hosts and guests created an engaging and entertaining broadcast that resonated with a wide audience.

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Transcript

[Tom Griswold]

This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. You chose to hit play on this podcast today.

[Chick McGee]

Smart choice.

[Tom Griswold]

Make another smart choice with autoquote Explorer.

[Chick McGee]

To compare rates for multiple car insurance companies all at once.

[Tom Griswold]

Try [e-mail] Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and.

[Chick McGee]

Affiliates not available in all states or situations. Prices vary based on how you buy.

[Christy Lee]

It's the Bob and Tom Show.

[Chick McGee]

The bird of America has always been the bald eagle.

[Christy Lee]

But there's another feathered unsung hero too.

[Chick McGee]

Generation after generation giving up for the common good.

[Christy Lee]

Listen to the story Let the truth be understood.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, eat me, I'm a turkey.

[Christy Lee]

My heart and red, white and blue.

[Chick McGee]

Eat me, I'm a turkey.

[Christy Lee]

True American patriot, true. And.

[Chick McGee]

1, 2, 3.

[Christy Lee]

Bread crumbs and butter. So chop off my head and then.

[Chick McGee]

Turn up the heat. Eat me, I'm a turkey.

[Christy Lee]

Stretch out on the sofa with your throat oh, eat me, I'm a turkey.

[Chick McGee]

Today I'll be a tasty sandwich too. Now turkeys have their spoon to factions Dissident birds unwilling to serve foul, pinko, sissy, wimpy turkey.

[Christy Lee]

That's right. But the major portion of these semi.

[Tom Griswold]

Flightless birds say oh, eat me, eat me, I'm a turkey.

[Chick McGee]

Turkey, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Penguins and parrots wouldn't be the same.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, eat me, I'm a turkey. Yeah. Gobble me up before the football game.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, boy.

[Chick McGee]

Hanky, Gert and Uncle Hank, get that.

[Christy Lee]

Whisk one and give it a yank.

[Tom Griswold]

Let's take this opportunity to thank who else but me?

[Chick McGee]

Turkey. That's right, eat me like the pilgrims used to do. Eat me, I'm a turkey.

[Christy Lee]

If I had a musket, I'd be eating you.

[Chick McGee]

I regret that I have but one carcass to give for my country. Oh, no one good looking turkey there. But we're gonna stuff really good.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm telling you right now. The turkey's being blocked off. The camera. We have set up the guillotine.

[Christy Lee]

Look at that. What was the budget for this? Holy hell. Oh.

[Tom Griswold]

Today I consider myself the luckiest bird. This thing's not going to kill me. This way.

[Chick McGee]

On the face of the Y. Oh, boy.

[Christy Lee]

Oh. Just kidding.

[Tom Griswold]

Happy Thanksgiving and the Graviton Show.

[Josh Arnold]

Good morning.

[Chick McGee]

Hello.

[Christy Lee]

From coast to coast, it's the Bob and Tom Show. Bob and Tom. Bob and Tom. Bob and Tom. Many portions of the upcoming program have.

[Chick McGee]

Been pre recorded, meaning they've already happened.

[Christy Lee]

And they're about to happen again. So where was it?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah. Ladies and gentlemen, we're glad to have you here. It's The Bob and Tom Show. Hello, Tom. Get ready for a big weekend. I know that Saturday and Sundays tend to be brutal.

[Tom Griswold]

Your own words got a lot going on. I want to thank everybody who helped me with clear ice.

[Christy Lee]

You got that going?

[Tom Griswold]

I'm working on it. I got a whole bunch of different aspects.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, that's right. You're having a big bourbon party over the weekend, aren't you?

[Chick McGee]

Thanksgiving.

[Tom Griswold]

We're having a pre Thanksgiving Thanksgiving Friendsgiving. Yeah. Yeah, Friendsgiving. As much as I love the idea of it and I love doing it, I hate the name.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Really?

[Tom Griswold]

Friendsgiving.

[Jess Hooker]

Well, what else would you call it?

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know, but not Friendsgiving.

[Jess Hooker]

Call it Dinner on Friday.

[Chick McGee]

I hate the name when you say it like that, too.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I hate almost anything. Here's a million dollars.

[Chick McGee]

No, I don't care for it. I don't care for it.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know. It sounds like some kind of car. Hallmark movie thing.

[Chick McGee]

I guess. You haven't done the invitations yet.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, hey. Yeah, Pat. Yeah, I don't expect to be invited.

[Chick McGee]

They should call it her friend.

[Tom Griswold]

Accurate.

[Chick McGee]

Have you told Heywood your big dilemma? That you can't do it without clear ice cubes.

[Tom Griswold]

And that's. I'm trying to get clear ice cubes. I've got a. I've got someone in my sphere, if you will, that is a bourbon person, very snotty about bourbon, which I know nothing about. So I made some phone calls. I called our friend, the bourbon ambassador from Kentucky.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, well, you're in good hands.

[Tom Griswold]

Seriously, I'm not kidding. And asked him for some suggestions. So I've got some unusual bourbons to serve, but I want to serve them with those clear ice cubes, those fancy ice cubes.

[Chick McGee]

It's very nice.

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, you're a very good host.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Then I found this out too, the other day. You can actually buy special bottled water to go with the bourbon. Oh, yeah, yeah. It's crazy.

[Chick McGee]

I've got.

[Tom Griswold]

What's the water in my house is. What do they call it? Reverse osmosis. I mean. Yeah, you know, my water is American citizen water. It's perfectly quality, good water.

[Chick McGee]

I saw Tom Selleck's pushing reverse osmosis, isn't he? Yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

You can get a reverse osmosis. Now. Are we ready? Are we ready to shift the satellite? There we go. Ladies and gentlemen, it's Mr. Jeff Osque.

[Greg Warren]

Hey, everybody. How's it going?

[Tom Griswold]

Good.

[Greg Warren]

I actually. Me and my lady the other day were joking about starting an artisanal ice company and she's like, no one would buy that. I'm like, there's some pretentious douchebag out.

[Chick McGee]

There who would buy $4 a cube.

[Greg Warren]

For clear square ice. So today's failed Dimension news desk is brought to you by Ask Artisanal Ice. We give you a lot news each week, but we don't give you all the news. So I'm here to give you the news that we failed to mention.

[Chick McGee]

Now here's Jeff Osque with what you failed to mention.

[Tom Griswold]

Nose.

[Christy Lee]

Pew. Pew. Pew. Pew.

[Josh Arnold]

Pew.

[Greg Warren]

I don't know if you guys saw this this week, but Patrick Dempsey was named People magazine Sexiest Man Alive.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah.

[Greg Warren]

Well, you failed to mention I came in a close. 1,839,384 places behind Mr. Dempsey.

[Chick McGee]

Close.

[Greg Warren]

There's a new Thanksgiving Pizza by DiGiorno which has all the toppings. Turkey, stuffing, green beans. What you failed to mention, it's not pathetic. It's DiGiorno. We learned yesterday put toilet paper in your fridge will absorb false odors. Well, you failed to mention use 2 ply. It absorbs twice as many. No.

[Chick McGee]

Okay, can we put a roll next to that joke?

[Christy Lee]

Whoa.

[Chick McGee]

I'll be wiping with this joke later.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, the ficality of the joke is substantial, too.

[Greg Warren]

If you hated that one, you're really gonna hate this. There's a news story telling people not to adorn their steering wheels with rhinestones. When the airbag goes off, they come at your face at 200 miles per hour, causing major damage. What you failed to mention. Don't be a rhinestone moron. Coming up December 9th in Jackson Hole, Wyoming. They're trying to set a new ski record for the most people skiing in jeans. What you failed to mention. I don't know if you guys know this about me. Back in the 80s, I competed in a world record for the most people running in jeans. It was called the Jordache. It even had a Bugle Boy there to signal the start of the Jordache. And of course, the course was shaped like a Z. Cavalry.

[Tom Griswold]

Jordash is so tasty. Tasty.

[Greg Warren]

There's a new snake pizza in Japan. The pizza's name is Sir Wong Fun. What you failed to mention Sir Wong Fun translates into English to I'll just have the salad we talked about no nut. November. What you failed to mention explains my testy attitude of late. I'm trying to hold out till jerk. In January.

[Tom Griswold]

No, not November.

[Greg Warren]

Was Mark. Mark Zuckerberg underwent surgery to replace his torn acl. What you failed to mention. Dad Insult to injury, they stole one of the new his new ACL from one of the Winklevoss twins.

[Tom Griswold]

Good idea.

[Greg Warren]

Australian surfer. Some chick's name broke the record for the biggest wave ever surfed this week. Well, you failed to mention. And up in Chicago, Willie Griswold is trying to set a new record for couch surfing. Did you guys see this? Three giant pandas got shipped back to China from the Smithsonian National Zoo. Well, you failed to mention their exhibit was replaced by America's national panda Panda Express.

[Chick McGee]

There's an irony there, isn't there?

[Greg Warren]

The shoe brand Crocs has partnered with McDonald's to make a new McDonald's inspired shoe. Well, you failed to mention the shoes are perfect for teens on their third pregnancy. Oh, Jesus.

[Christy Lee]

Teens?

[Greg Warren]

Yeah, teens never get knocked up. All right. And finally, two female astronauts completed their first spacewalk the other day. Well, you failed to mention. Sounds like two ladies were late getting dinner on the table that evening. I said 1952.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you, Jeff Ozge. Right now I recommend that we switch gears and go that way to the news desk where we have sitting in for Christie lee. It is Ms. Jess Hooker. Jess, what have we missed?

[Jess Hooker]

A farmer in Australia is recovering after fending off a crocodile attack. I feel like this has been the theme of the news.

[Christy Lee]

This animal attacks.

[Jess Hooker]

According to the Australian Broadcast Corporation, cattle producer Dr. Or Mr. Colin Devereaux was attacked near the Finnish River. He said the reptile latched onto his foot, shook him like a rag doll and pulled him into the water. Devereaux tried kicking the crocodile before he managed to bite the animal back.

[Chick McGee]

Well, huh.

[Christy Lee]

That's maybe the most Australian thing I've ever heard.

[Chick McGee]

Right.

[Christy Lee]

Hey, bite him back. Eh?

[Jess Hooker]

He recalled.

[Christy Lee]

Whatever.

[Jess Hooker]

By accident. By accident. My teeth caught his eyelid.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh.

[Jess Hooker]

I jerked back and he let go.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow. Did the crocodile lose an eye?

[Jess Hooker]

The crocodile chased after Devereaux, but he managed to get to his car safely, wrap up his injuries and drive himself to the hospital.

[Chick McGee]

The crocodile did lose an eye. Now it's just a crocodile.

[Tom Griswold]

Crocodile.

[Christy Lee]

Lou lost an eye or an alligator.

[Chick McGee]

That's right.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Wow.

[Jess Hooker]

After nearly a month of treatment, he is set to be released from the hospital.

[Tom Griswold]

A month?

[Josh Arnold]

A month.

[Chick McGee]

Well, that's a long time for an alligator to be our crocodile to be in the hospital.

[Tom Griswold]

Now we know they measurement after a while. Crocodile 30 days. Doesn't Australia have something like 9 of the 10 most deadly snakes or something?

[Jess Hooker]

I think so.

[Christy Lee]

They've got like ducks with venom in them or something.

[Chick McGee]

It's an island of nightmares.

[Christy Lee]

Yes, it is it's God's mistake.

[Tom Griswold]

Platypi. Yeah. Okay, very good.

[Christy Lee]

I wonder how the crocodile news covered the crazed man bites our mayor. What the hell's going on here?

[Chick McGee]

I was trying to give him a shake, welcome him to our well.

[Christy Lee]

I was giving him the welcoming foot.

[Tom Griswold]

Lick and needed to take a swim.

[Jess Hooker]

I just recently learned how to tell the difference between a crocodile and an alligator.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, this will be good. Yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

One you'll see later and the other you'll see afterwards.

[Chick McGee]

I love it. Love it. Ace, your thoughts.

[Christy Lee]

Hey there.

[Ace Cosby]

Good morning and welcome to a Thanksgiving morning. This is Christopher in studio for the best of the Bob and Tom show today. Coming up on the show today, comedian Greg Warren, Greg Hahn, Jeff Osque, Tom blowing out his car and lots more Coming up next though, hunting Allie Breen and news we failed to mention. This is the Bob and Tom show.

[Tom Griswold]

This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. You chose to hit play on this podcast today.

[Chick McGee]

Smart choice. Make another smart choice with Auto Quote Explorer to compare rates for multiple car insurance companies all at once.

[Tom Griswold]

Try [e-mail] Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and.

[Chick McGee]

Affiliates not available in all states or situations. Prices vary based on how you buy.

[Ace Cosby]

Welcome back. Happy Thanksgiving morning. This is Christopher in the Bob and Tom studios. In this segment, some hunting. How about some Ali Breen and news we failed to mention with Jeff Oskay.

[Christy Lee]

It's our annual Thanksgiving eve show.

[Josh Arnold]

We're gonna we having a dinner.

[Christy Lee]

We're gonna hunt and kill a turkey coming up here very very soon. I think next hour gonna go out in the side yard here and got.

[Tom Griswold]

A letter here from Aaron. Put an arrow right through its head in Shelby, Ohio.

[Josh Arnold]

Hi Aaron.

[Tom Griswold]

He experienced what I did. He guess. Yes. We go pheasant hunting the week of Thanksgiving. You normally have a pile of buckshot beside your plate when you're done eating. Sorry to ruin your day, Chick. Tom is right. I'm telling you, I almost broke a tooth biting down on a piece of buckshot.

[Christy Lee]

Why don't you use a bullet that's, you know, not more efficient? Yes. How about a single bullet?

[Tom Griswold]

Really?

[Christy Lee]

How about a high powered rifle from up on a hill? Speaking of November 22nd, about 150 yards.

[Tom Griswold]

Wait a second, hang on a second. November 22nd.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, that's right.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, that's right. Today's the 60th anniversary of.

[Josh Arnold]

You want to try that?

[Christy Lee]

Triangulate the fire is what you want to do. I can't think of anything more upsetting than oh, I saw a flash of.

[Tom Griswold]

Light on hers There we go. There we go.

[Christy Lee]

It's my favorite tie you wear. It's the rubber duck tie. I love that.

[Tom Griswold]

We've been joined by the formerly sick Jeff Osque.

[Chick McGee]

I'm back, baby.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, he is.

[Tom Griswold]

What have we got here, Jeff?

[Greg Warren]

We give you a lot of the news each week, but we don't give you all the news. So I'm here to give you the news that we failed to mention.

[Chick McGee]

Now here's Jeff Osu with what you failed to mention.

[Tom Griswold]

Nose.

[Christy Lee]

Pew, pew, pew, pew, pew.

[Greg Warren]

As we've talked about for a couple weeks now, two female astronauts on a spacewalk lost a toolkit that is visible in the sky via binoculars. Well, you failed to mention. According to my binoculars, the two female coeds in the condo behind my house look to have lost their tops.

[Chick McGee]

The other.

[Tom Griswold]

Tops. The naked eye, you see.

[Greg Warren]

No, I had binoculars. A bright threw her husband a surprise wedding reception at the local Waffle House. What you failed to mention. His hash browns weren't the only thing smothered and covered that night. 17th century Italians used marijuana. We learned that. Well, you failed to mention. And that's why the 17th century is known as the Stoned Age.

[Tom Griswold]

I didn't know that.

[Christy Lee]

Stone Age just made it up.

[Greg Warren]

Facts. Some dude somewhere set a new world record for the most chopsticks in one's beard. What you failed to mention. I'm still holding down the record for the most crumbs.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, you got stuff in there you're not even aware of.

[Greg Warren]

Oh, my gosh. Oh, there's a goldfish from two years ago.

[Tom Griswold]

Chop suey in there.

[Greg Warren]

There's a new pap smear beer. Which is exactly what you think it is. What you failed to mention. And just like a real pap smear, no one is looking forward to it.

[Josh Arnold]

No.

[Christy Lee]

Boy, you'd have to love her a lot, wouldn't you?

[Tom Griswold]

My God.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, man.

[Christy Lee]

Boy. Okay.

[Greg Warren]

A man brought home a snake from a hike that he thought wasn't dangerous, but it was, and now he's in the hospital. What you failed to mention. Worst thing I ever brought home from a hike was poison ivy on my groin.

[Tom Griswold]

Ooh. What were you doing right there on the.

[Greg Warren]

Peeing on a tree.

[Christy Lee]

In his own time. That's right.

[Greg Warren]

And that's why I'm no longer allowed it. Parks, we learn the brandy Old Fashioned is the official drink of Wisconsin. What you failed to mention. Which explains their three letter state abbreviation at the time was owi. Owi Operating Wild. Yeah, they shortened it to WI. They thought it gave the state A bad name. Remember the good old days of three letter abbreviations?

[Chick McGee]

Ah, I'm sick.

[Greg Warren]

I bet you've been sick.

[Christy Lee]

He's been sick. He's been off. And I want to point out that Ace has yet to write him any material. So what do you expect?

[Greg Warren]

Still waiting for.

[Christy Lee]

It's a work in progress.

[Greg Warren]

Yeah, still waiting for your highlights magazine to show up. Scientists discovered an asteroid that has its own moon. What you failed to mention that is what's known in astrology as the dingleberry moon. Dingleberry moon. Speaking of astrology, Saturn's rings are going to disappear. What you failed to mention so will the ones around Uranus with a little soap and warm water.

[Christy Lee]

That's true. That's absolutely true.

[Greg Warren]

Oh, we're getting close to the end. And like a Chilean miner, I've never been happier. The movie change. Cinemark will now deliver concessions to your home. What you failed to mention for an extra 20 bucks, they'll pre drilled the bottom of the popcorn bucket for you.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh.

[Greg Warren]

Can you imagine trying that trick at home?

[Christy Lee]

At home?

[Greg Warren]

Yeah, I tried it with a bag of microwave popcorn. You want to wait for that stuff to cool.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

You think the poison ivy was bad when you get hot butter. Dick, that is rough.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, hot butterick.

[Tom Griswold]

Especially when you add salt to it. Yikes.

[Greg Warren]

Yeah, watch the salt. And finally we learned people are dropping deuces while waiting in line at Disney.

[Chick McGee]

What?

[Greg Warren]

You worst part? They can't keep Pluto from rolling in it.

[Christy Lee]

Pluto's a dog, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, very good. Thank you, Pluto. Another way sexy time works is you write those love letters and about things.

[Christy Lee]

Hello? Ali, are you there to get him to stop talking? Is that a problem? Hello?

[Tom Griswold]

Things that may be going wrong in your love life. We're here to help. We?

[Josh Arnold]

This day's going great.

[Tom Griswold]

We're going to hook up with Alec. By the way, yeah, we did have an issue with.

[Christy Lee]

Hello?

[Tom Griswold]

The. The. The room getting the door locked.

[Josh Arnold]

There she is.

[Tom Griswold]

There's Ali Breen.

[Josh Arnold]

Kidnapped. What's going on?

[H]

I'm in a hotel and I'm having tech problems. My mic wouldn't work. So I'm just leaning into my speaker phone and seeing if this works.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Where are you? In a hotel room in Atlanta.

[H]

I'm visiting the family.

[Chick McGee]

But I'm.

[H]

I'm not staying with them until Thanksgiving night.

[Christy Lee]

Ah, I don't blame him.

[Chick McGee]

That's a good idea.

[Christy Lee]

Anyway.

[Tom Griswold]

Now. Ally, we can hear you. Okay. We can see you. You look great. Of course. And it's time now for sexy time. What have you got for us.

[H]

Dear Ally, my girlfriend brought her friend home for a threesome. She has hooked up with her on her own before. We talked about it and then we finally did it and then I saw the girl again without. Without her. And she's coming unglued. And my role. She initiated us getting together and now wants to break up and says I cheated on her. But she meets her alone herself. So how is this different?

[Josh Arnold]

That's a good question. Yeah, that's a very good question.

[Christy Lee]

Just go ahead and break up with her.

[Josh Arnold]

She and her girlfriend have a thing, right? And then they brought him in and now he's seeing the girlfriend with a thing too. But she's upset about it and she's.

[Christy Lee]

Already seeing him on her. She's seeing her on her own.

[Josh Arnold]

Right? So it's like. Yeah, it's like you just keep hooking up with the other girl and then break up with your current girlfriend and then make them.

[Christy Lee]

Then make them break up and then you made the switch. Oh, there it is.

[Tom Griswold]

Too many Christmas presents to buy. Pick one and get out.

[Chick McGee]

No kidding.

[Josh Arnold]

Is that how you look at.

[Christy Lee]

At it?

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know.

[Josh Arnold]

It sounds like he was the third as opposed to being in the relationship. Does that sound right, Ally? Oh, like she was hooking up with the girl first.

[H]

Kind of. But it sounds like that wasn't a relationship. Like that was like a college. Like we did this for fun a couple times. Now let's bring you in to my relationship is what I think it's what you can make the argument. Yeah, that they were first and he's the threesome guy.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't think there are any hard and fast rules here.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't either.

[Christy Lee]

I beg your pardon? You've got to have rules. Or what do you have? Chaos. That's right. And that's what we have.

[Josh Arnold]

What would your three way rules be?

[Christy Lee]

Well, no kissing.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Fully clothed.

[Christy Lee]

Always fully clothed. Except the bottoms. Bert, camp must be playing on the stereo and I think you have some.

[Tom Griswold]

Tall order.

[Christy Lee]

What's the name? Next letter.

[Tom Griswold]

Ally. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Took care of that.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, next.

[H]

Dear Ally, I am married 10 years with two kids. My wife has gained at least 50 pounds since we got.

[Tom Griswold]

What a hog.

[Christy Lee]

Good God.

[Chick McGee]

Oh my God.

[H]

I haven't had much sex with her since she. Since she put on these pounds. She caught me pleasant myself to porn and said that she considers that cheating. I married Naomi Campbell and now she looks more like Earl Campbell.

[Chick McGee]

Is this really doing jokes?

[Tom Griswold]

If nothing else, I admire the. Admire the jokes.

[Christy Lee]

But Earl Campbell, one of the top five running backs, and Naomi Campbell, very pretty lady.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

So I'm sorry, There's two. There's two issues here than it would seem to me.

[Christy Lee]

I can't think of any other better day than on Thanksgiving day to cut that string and let that balloon, that fat, fat balloon sail away.

[Josh Arnold]

They have two children.

[Christy Lee]

Check Wednesdays and every other weekend.

[Tom Griswold]

So there's two. There's two issues here. Am I corre if I heard this? She's upset that he's viewing erotic cinema. Is that correct?

[H]

Exactly.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And then he's upset that she doesn't want to have relations with him. Is that correct?

[H]

Or is it you might not want to have relations with her? Which maybe. Maybe she's saying, why don't we just have sex and you don't have to watch porn? And he's like, she got too fat.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Yeah. Well, this is kind of a black and white problem. It's pretty simple. What would you do if somebody got too fat for you?

[Chick McGee]

Bring salad home.

[Christy Lee]

Good God.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, Pat's got it all solved. Hey, baby. I'm gonna have some pizza. Your salads, your salads in the fridge. Take off your pants.

[Christy Lee]

I tell you what, Chunkles, here's what we're gonna do. Have a salad.

[Josh Arnold]

Now, this is a rough thing.

[Tom Griswold]

There's some fine new weight loss pharmaceuticals going on the market. You may want to tantalize her with one of those.

[Josh Arnold]

Why don't you have sex with her so she can burn some calories? I don't know why you're not, like, trying to do. Watch the porn together. It's not cheating if you watch porn. Well, they masturbate, though.

[Christy Lee]

Sounds like the only thing they can do is watch tv.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, you can't get close enough to.

[Christy Lee]

Her to do anything else.

[Tom Griswold]

Maybe get some. Get some donuts and porn and. Yeah, sit her down.

[Christy Lee]

That's right.

[Josh Arnold]

We are horrible.

[Christy Lee]

Tom. You, I think, put some donuts around your shaft, see what happens. Okay.

[Chick McGee]

Gobble that right up.

[Christy Lee]

There's a contest.

[Tom Griswold]

Gobble that right up, There's a contest. How many standard size donuts can you get around the thing?

[Christy Lee]

There it is.

[H]

And then how many can she eat off it?

[Tom Griswold]

Sadly, she can eat six, but he can only get two around.

[Chick McGee]

He's gonna see some icing.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, I think we've once again done no help. Ali Breen is our guest. You can reach her. A L L I B r E e N. Allie is a standup comedian, and any social media platform should link you to Allie.

[Christy Lee]

£50. What do we have another.

[Tom Griswold]

Do we have a letter? Do we have another letter?

[H]

I hope to God I have been dating a guy for the last two years. It hasn't been exclusive, but we do see each other regularly and we have great times. I just found out, however, that he's actively dating five other women.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow.

[H]

When I confronted him, he said, well, we both knew we weren't exclusive, but am I crazy? Doesn't dating five people at the same time put up a serious red flag? Plus, no more blood diseases. We use protection, but not during oral.

[Chick McGee]

Should I be worried?

[H]

I feel like I need to wear hazmats.

[Tom Griswold]

Well.

[Christy Lee]

Well, first of all, no one likes protection during a world that's kind of silly.

[Ace Cosby]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

There's not a big run on the dental dam or the rubber bj. And where are the dental damsel? They're aisle seven. They're on sale. They're in the end cap.

[Christy Lee]

He's seeing five other people. So he's organized. Yeah. He knows what's going on.

[Chick McGee]

He can work a schedule.

[Christy Lee]

I say you should be lucky to be one of the five.

[Tom Griswold]

This guy's got CFO written all. Yes, he's got a big future.

[Chick McGee]

Damn right, day planner.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, you know what? She knew this going in. I don't know what. She's so surprised if this guy said we're not exclusive.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, she didn't get fat, did she?

[Tom Griswold]

She gave the last letter.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, okay. Get out.

[Josh Arnold]

Depends on what she. It just depends on what she wants. If it's working, I mess it up. I mean, but the whole time she's gonna be thinking, well, what'd you do with Susie?

[Christy Lee]

What about with Queenie? That's the last thing you can do is worry about who he's pounding when he's not with you. Okay, Don't. Don't even think of it.

[Tom Griswold]

By the way, did he tell you that he'll be by for Thanksgiving giving at exactly 11:14? He's got. He's got to leave at 12:10.

[Chick McGee]

Thank you.

[Christy Lee]

And he's got eight minutes of that. Yeah, that's pure coitus.

[Tom Griswold]

And so that's all he's got.

[Chick McGee]

He's got you penciled in.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. And then he's going to leave his car running and back it in so he can get out quickly.

[Christy Lee]

And you have to cancel. It's going to be another two weeks before you can.

[Chick McGee]

I can't fit you in.

[Tom Griswold]

We've solved that one. We have time for one more letter.

[H]

Dear Allie, my husband offered for us to host Thanksgiving, but so far he's done zero shopping, zero cooking and zero cleaning.

[Christy Lee]

Attaboy.

[H]

So volunteered me to do all those things.

[Tom Griswold]

Exactly.

[H]

He works full time and I work part time from home. And we have one child. He says that I'm the one who has time to do all this stuff, but I'm the one raising his kid and keeping up his home.

[Christy Lee]

It's his kid, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

I'll tell you what, Ali, I was just reading an article about this. More and more Americans are going out for Thanksgiving. So they're going to. There's lots of restaurants that have Thanksgiving specials. I would recommend that Mr. Hardworking get out his Visa, MasterCard, American Express or Diners Club and take everybody out to dinner. So this hard working mother of a one year old who has better things to do than worry about the. All the stress that Thanksgiving brings, go out for dinner. That's what I would do.

[H]

I totally agree. Or at least order one of those. Can't you just order from.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, there's also tons of places that are doing to go.

[Josh Arnold]

But in her defense, and you know this, you're hosting. There's a lot more to it than just the cooking. It's the cleaning and the organizing and the decorating and the.

[Tom Griswold]

I have dish pan hands. I've been washing dishes for three days.

[Josh Arnold]

It's a lot to host.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah. But no, that's. There's a simple solution. Especially if this guy doesn't want to do any of the work, right? Especially with a baby. Come on, that's way too much to ask. She could always do the old Lysistrata bit and say no nookie, no washy. What is it? No, no washing, no washy, no nookie. Which is what? No, wasn't that, Was that Lysistrata? That wasn't the Greeks. Was that Confucius?

[Christy Lee]

Using that with some, some dry cleaner.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, okay. Lysistrata Dry cleaner. It's, it's a, it's a, it's a Greek reference. Ladies and gentlemen, the benefits of a classical education. Allie, I hope you have a great time in Atlanta with the various members of your family. Who's going to be at the dinner table for Thanksgiving?

[H]

It's going to be my, you know, me, my sister, her family, the kids, and then my brother in law's parents and one of his brothers. So it's going to be a bunch of us.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you bring your boyfriend, friend?

[H]

No, he's with his family this year.

[Tom Griswold]

Is he?

[Josh Arnold]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

Did he, did he ask you to come with him?

[H]

Yeah, yeah, we decided to Go separately this year. This is a first.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, it's probably best to eat.

[Christy Lee]

Just ease right up.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

Are you gonna put. What do you put on your plate? Like a tablespoon of cranberry sauce and half a carrot. You're gonna go big.

[H]

I won't eat all day. I'll have a huge, nice, big Thanksgiving day. I don't love the turkey. Everything else is amazing, though. I'll go big on stuffing, mashed potatoes, that green bean casserole.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Okay. Well, good luck. Thank you. The lovely Allie Breen. Always a great pleasure, Allie. Good job.

[Josh Arnold]

Happy Thanksgiving, Allie.

[Tom Griswold]

Well worth it.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. That was good.

[Tom Griswold]

We certainly helped a lot of people.

[Christy Lee]

Yes, we did.

[Ace Cosby]

Coming up in just a few minutes. Tom is psyched for the holiday and Krabby chicken it's coming up next. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Josh Arnold]

Bob and Tom getting zone autozone.

[Chick McGee]

Welcome to autozone. What are you working on today? So you've got an oil change coming up. You can go farther and save on full synthetic with our oil change special right now you can get 5 quarts of Valvoline Advanced Full Synthetic with an STP Extended Life Oil Filter for just 33.99. Get the parts you need when you need them at autozone or autozone.com restrictions apply.

[Ace Cosby]

Welcome back. This is the Bob and Tom show on a Thanksgiving morning. This is Christopher here in the Bob and Tom studios. The gang is back in here live on Monday. In this segment, Tom is psyched for the holiday and Chick is crabby.

[Christy Lee]

Right smack dab in the middle of the holidays. We're all kind of loogie in the thick of it. Or in the thick of it.

[Tom Griswold]

All right, we're up.

[Christy Lee]

We're up to our ears in weeds of holiday celebration.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm psyched.

[Chick McGee]

Is that right?

[Tom Griswold]

A lot of great Christmas songs out there already having a good time. Ready for. Ready for the holidays.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

I haven't had time good ideas for.

[Christy Lee]

Presents, the Christmas ceilings since, let me think, 2011. And I don't see this year changing.

[Chick McGee]

It's going to change this year.

[Christy Lee]

Thank you very much. This year.

[Josh Arnold]

I can feel it.

[Chick McGee]

You got a lot of love coming your way.

[Christy Lee]

No, no, that's not going to.

[Tom Griswold]

It's like the setup for a Hallmark movie.

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, it's going to happen.

[Josh Arnold]

This is where, speaking of love, yesterday was Chick's birthday.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, happy birthday, Chick.

[Christy Lee]

Hang on a second, Tom. Thanks for mentioning that.

[Chick McGee]

You're finally ahead of me.

[Christy Lee]

We get. We get to our age, we don't mention birthdays.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

We do.

[Chick McGee]

No, we do not.

[Christy Lee]

No, we don't.

[Chick McGee]

Oh shoot. I sent you a text. Should I not have?

[Josh Arnold]

I sent you a text too?

[Chick McGee]

You're not completely forgotten. I'm sorry, man.

[Christy Lee]

No, no, I don't. You get to be 73 years old, you're not gonna like birthdays.

[Chick McGee]

I'm telling you, you've got quite a.

[Tom Griswold]

Ways to get there. Got a nice letter here on a different topic. Thank God I was listening to some of the shows over the Thanksgiving break.

[Christy Lee]

Nobody cares.

[Tom Griswold]

Pat and I heard that.

[Chick McGee]

Nobody cares.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you. This is from Brian.

[Chick McGee]

Hi Brian.

[Christy Lee]

I'm going to turn up the Krabby meter.

[Chick McGee]

We appreciate you turning her up, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

I realize that Pat's new girlfriend is named Paula.

[Christy Lee]

Have you checked with Pat about doing this letter?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, we played pickle ball last night. Wonderful. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

That means everything's okay.

[Tom Griswold]

I realized that that was the name of Tom's maid from childhood. Oh yeah, the famous one Tom thought was a ger. Spy. Coincidence? I think not. Right.

[Christy Lee]

And what was her sister's name? Helga. Or stereotypically Helga. Is that right?

[Tom Griswold]

Absolutely. She had held she and Helga talking on the phone and it would always scare me.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, Tommy, it's time to get in the shower. Tommy. Oh my goodness, Tommy, you're getting too big for me to give your shower.

[Tom Griswold]

Paula was about 5:2 and built like Happy Humphrey. She was a big gal.

[Christy Lee]

My goodness, you're Schwarzstoke is gigantic.

[Tom Griswold]

Her strudel was to die for though, as they said.

[Christy Lee]

Don't stare at my heaving bosom, my creamy strudel.

[Tom Griswold]

Helga, help me try that voice on your Paula, won't you?

[Chick McGee]

Your T shirts have grown so crispy.

[Tom Griswold]

Let me know how it goes. Paula taught me how to iron.

[Christy Lee]

I always remember the little known Donald Sutherland movie. The Needle or something. Isn't that. That's a great movie.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I'm not familiar.

[Christy Lee]

There's a part in it where he's a German spy. And because you thought you were certain Paula was a spy talking to her sister.

[Josh Arnold]

Did her sister live here in the States?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Oh.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I met her a few times actually.

[Chick McGee]

She looked like her sister.

[Tom Griswold]

No three way.

[Josh Arnold]

My brother in law's mother's name was Helga. Maybe they were related. You don't know?

[Tom Griswold]

Could be. I don't know. Let's. Let's shift gears.

[Chick McGee]

Did you give her the old German upside down cake?

[Tom Griswold]

No, Kaspala would have eaten it.

[Chick McGee]

Or German chocolate pineapple upside down.

[Christy Lee]

You have a whole drill.

[Tom Griswold]

Give it to German Hawaii, Berlin people Confuse the two all the time.

[Chick McGee]

Hawaii in Berlin were part of one war.

[Tom Griswold]

I remember flying into Berlin and getting one of those lathes put around my neck.

[Christy Lee]

Oh. What is it?

[Tom Griswold]

You will enjoy it. Then they tightened it and hanged me.

[Christy Lee]

It's nor McDonald. Keep an eye on Germany. They keep starting fights with the world. Okay, I'm sorry.

[Tom Griswold]

Christie Lee is at the Bob and Tom new desk.

[Josh Arnold]

Speaking of food, there's a new survey that I find interesting out there.

[Christy Lee]

You're the only one.

[Josh Arnold]

Geez, he's gonna snap out of it. Yeah, yeah. It reveals how dull midweek meals can be for some people. 60% say they eat the same dinner up to four times a week.

[Christy Lee]

That's almost half.

[Josh Arnold]

Four times a week you eat the same meal. Do you do that?

[Chick McGee]

I do. I would say three. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

What do you have three times a week?

[Chick McGee]

Avocado toast. Ooh.

[Tom Griswold]

Really? This is a. We've become very uptown avocado. I was hoping. He must be a pretty good pizza with extra cheese. What is happening? This is no fun.

[Chick McGee]

Fresh.

[Tom Griswold]

Next thing I know, you're gonna quit mastering.

[Chick McGee]

Smoked salmon and a poached egg.

[Josh Arnold]

Nice.

[Tom Griswold]

I'll have nothing to tell you.

[Chick McGee]

I make it at home and then I throw on some onion salts and.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

It's very good.

[Josh Arnold]

That's your dinner?

[Chick McGee]

No, it's often my midday.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, okay.

[Christy Lee]

My.

[Chick McGee]

My lunch. Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

So. I'm sorry. So the point of this is that most people have the same thing.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

The boring dinner. They. Four times a week. What do you eat? I'm. I'm sure, Pat, you have a salad.

[Chick McGee]

No. Warm grain bowl from a local.

[Tom Griswold]

Pat can't participate anymore. He's. Now he's a vegan.

[Chick McGee]

Good for you, Pat. Whatever makes you feel good.

[Josh Arnold]

You're not far off.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I like to slaughter animals and eat them. I'm a big fan.

[Josh Arnold]

You eat the same meal four times a week?

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, no, no. What we do is every night we fight about where we're going to go out to eat Taco Tuesday it will be Taco Tuesday tomorrow.

[Josh Arnold]

Spaghetti.

[Tom Griswold]

Every week it will be. Let's see. What do we have? Oh, last night we had delicious little ham sliders with ham and cheese sliders with homemade tomato soup. It was lovely.

[Chick McGee]

Were the ham sliders on Hawaiian rolls?

[Tom Griswold]

They were all right.

[Christy Lee]

Round it.

[Chick McGee]

Fine.

[Josh Arnold]

Leftover from Thanksgiving.

[Chick McGee]

You certainly did it correct.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no. I think. I don't know what the timing is. I'm.

[Chick McGee]

It's fresh ham every day over there. Kristen.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I.

[Christy Lee]

No, no, I.

[Tom Griswold]

What?

[Christy Lee]

Pig's out on the back 30.

[Tom Griswold]

At what point is the turkey. I tossed everything yesterday. I don't know.

[Josh Arnold]

I wish it was only three days. I think it would be fine.

[Chick McGee]

Do you not have a freezer? You can freeze food. I could come over. You could put it on the back.

[Tom Griswold]

We didn't have much left anyway.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, okay.

[Tom Griswold]

We had 23 people, so.

[Chick McGee]

Still a colossal waste.

[Tom Griswold]

I'll tell what was a big hit.

[Christy Lee]

I received no invitation.

[Chick McGee]

Son, get some those pies.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, the pumpkin cheesecake that I took.

[Tom Griswold]

How long is that? I still have some pumpkin cheesecake left. Is that still edible?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, it's in the fridge, Right? Yeah, I would think. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

It's delicious.

[Josh Arnold]

Boy, that was so good.

[Chick McGee]

I have some too. I was going to bring it in, but it's a little co. That reminds.

[Christy Lee]

Me, you know, to starts with a P. You know that?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Many find cooking a new meal too much effort to do in the middle of the week. And 45% said they simply don't have the time.

[Chick McGee]

You make the time. Well, says the guy with avocado toast.

[Tom Griswold]

Ace. Do you have the same thing for three, four times a week for lunch?

[Chick McGee]

I usually do make my little bit of stir fry.

[Tom Griswold]

There you go. Very nice.

[Chick McGee]

Walk on the Wild side.

[Josh Arnold]

Do you eat the same thing three or four times a week?

[Christy Lee]

It depends on what they're bringing from the home.

[Chick McGee]

What?

[Tom Griswold]

Hang on. If you're the wok. W. Okay. Walk on the Wild side.

[Christy Lee]

Who said that?

[Tom Griswold]

A reference, of course, to both.

[Christy Lee]

Right over there.

[Tom Griswold]

Lou Reed.

[Christy Lee]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

Is. Is there has to be some restaurant called Walk on the Wild side.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I'm sure it will be tomorrow. Used to be walk and roll.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, that was.

[Christy Lee]

That was like a chain, right?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Really?

[Josh Arnold]

They had great egg rolls there.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, evidently not so great.

[Josh Arnold]

You know what?

[Tom Griswold]

Not everything is now it's Walk on by little Dion Warwick tribute. As they walk it off. As they put the clothes.

[Christy Lee]

Thanks a lot for not coming in.

[Tom Griswold]

Is there. Is there one for the Ventures? Walk don't run. We can do this all day.

[Christy Lee]

The Ventures. You can out obscure. You can out obscure anyone. The venue.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, they are. I don't know who they are.

[Chick McGee]

They're old. They're old.

[Tom Griswold]

They're in the Rock and Roll hall of Fame.

[Josh Arnold]

The Ventures.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, sure. Pity vote.

[Josh Arnold]

The Ventures are in the Rock and Roll hall of Fame.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, they are.

[Christy Lee]

They are somebody. Fact check.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, they have to be walked out running. What if Patty Smith can be in there? Who can actually. The Ventures. Who can actually play instruments. They have to be in there. I'LL look them up right now.

[Josh Arnold]

2008.

[Chick McGee]

Really?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Good for the ven.

[Christy Lee]

Good.

[Tom Griswold]

You ever hear this little tune? Christy Lee?

[Christy Lee]

None of us can hear it is now.

[Tom Griswold]

Why isn't it playing?

[Chick McGee]

You're playing it in your.

[Tom Griswold]

You ever hear this?

[Josh Arnold]

I've heard this.

[Tom Griswold]

That's the Ventures.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, that's garbage.

[Josh Arnold]

I love it.

[Tom Griswold]

That's life out.

[Christy Lee]

Of course, that's a lot more unpleasant to the air than I recall.

[Tom Griswold]

How about this one? This is. This would be the. The Chinese restaurant Walk Don't Run also.

[Christy Lee]

Here it is.

[Tom Griswold]

Why is this not going? As you can see, they. By the way, editor's note, they with.

[Christy Lee]

A drummer had more than one vote in this.

[Tom Griswold]

They like the drum intro.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Don't you remember a time when if you could play, if you. Someone would say they're a drummer and you'd always go, can you play Wipeout?

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, I do remember that.

[Tom Griswold]

Can you see someone doing that to Buddy Rich?

[Christy Lee]

Buddy Rich. Another obscure reference. I'm going to start counting them every. Every morning.

[Tom Griswold]

Rich was certainly fine.

[Christy Lee]

He hasn't been alive this century.

[Chick McGee]

I don't think you can go with Kenny Aronoff now.

[Tom Griswold]

I could go with Kenny as a great drummer.

[Josh Arnold]

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[Christy Lee]

Walk, walk, don't run. Walk, walk. That is really.

[Josh Arnold]

So all of their stuff. They were instrumentalists.

[Chick McGee]

Surf rock for sure. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. That's great stuff. Okay, so we're trying to develop a new restaurant called Walk on the Wild side. Well, keeping with Join your little Lou Reed Spicy.

[Chick McGee]

I want to see what part of that song you play. Yeah, go ahead and start it.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, you're one of the ladies. One of the ladies singing.

[Ace Cosby]

Coming up next on this Thanksgiving, Thanksgiving morning, next hour, Christmas wrapping and Greg Hahn. But next, Tom is blowing out his car with a leaf blower. It's coming up next on the Bob and Tom show.

[Christy Lee]

Bob and Tom.

[Ace Cosby]

This is the Bob and Tom show. Welcome back on this Thursday morning. This is Christopher doing the best of the Bob and Tom show today. Well, Tom admitted that he blows out his car with his leaf blower. And the comedy ensued.

[Tom Griswold]

Josh is leaving his car here and just said, could you. Would you mind leaving me your keys? And then you said.

[Chick McGee]

I said, sure. Yeah. But I want to warn you, my dashboard is currently embarrassingly dusty, so I.

[Tom Griswold]

Have a hack for you, if you will.

[Chick McGee]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

The term.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

To clean your car. That's something I've discovered recently.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. What you do is you take your car out in your driveway. All right? Okay. You open all the doors. Okay. And then. Do you have a hat? Hatchback.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

You open the hatchback. You remove everything from the car.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. All your stuff.

[Josh Arnold]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

Then you take your leaf blower and you. And then you.

[Josh Arnold]

What?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I do this all the time.

[Christy Lee]

This is the equivalent of him having that can of air when he blows his keyboard vacuum.

[Tom Griswold]

Because there you. There's stuff under the seats.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And you. It. You can blow everything out.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Chick McGee]

You just blow everything up.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

That's crazy.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, you know, you're gonna.

[Christy Lee]

Right out there in your driveway, Then.

[Tom Griswold]

You go sweep the driveway.

[Chick McGee]

You don't sweep the driveway, because that's.

[Tom Griswold]

Sweep the driveway.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. So now you got to do double two tasks.

[Chick McGee]

Just take the vacuum cleaner in the car.

[Tom Griswold]

It's a great thing. And then. Then you go.

[Christy Lee]

Then you got to mow the yard because there's stuff in the yard.

[Tom Griswold]

And then you got to rake it.

[Chick McGee]

Cups and french fries, lots of things.

[Tom Griswold]

Either stuff under. Under the seats. I'm not speculating what's under your seats. I imagine there might be a Taco bell wrapper or 5. Some errant onion rings or whatever. But then you get rid of all the junk in your car.

[Christy Lee]

All right.

[Josh Arnold]

Seriously, do that.

[Tom Griswold]

I do it all the time. Do it every weekend.

[Chick McGee]

I'm not going to do that. I do appreciate.

[Christy Lee]

Because they make I don't know how many bazillion different car vacs just for that.

[Tom Griswold]

They can't get the vac underneath to get that stuff under the seats. This is a great.

[Christy Lee]

Well, they make tiny little nozzles.

[Tom Griswold]

You'd be surprised.

[Chick McGee]

My car is pretty Clean, but for the dust on the.

[Tom Griswold]

And then some of the car washes of those places, they have those little pneumatic thing that give the. Yeah, those are great.

[Josh Arnold]

Those work, too.

[Tom Griswold]

You get the dashboard, get some of the dust off, then wipe it down. But you got to open. You got to open the whole thing up. Otherwise the dust accumulates.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

You spin around inside.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. And you don't want to do it in your garage, and you just get all the junk in there.

[Chick McGee]

Now, do you clean your home the same way? Just walk inside with a leaf blower?

[Christy Lee]

I don't know why you wouldn't open all the windows.

[Tom Griswold]

You're going to laugh.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Duct tapes, the lamps.

[Tom Griswold]

You're gonna laugh. But it's true that. No, the. The dog room, which is the laundry room.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

There's a washer and a dryer and, like a little mini closet. And then the dogs are in there.

[Chick McGee]

And I'm guessing there's a door that leads to the garage or the outside.

[Tom Griswold]

There's door leads to the outside.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

So what you do is you bring in the big floor fan, and you turn that on so it's pointing toward the door. So the air is going to be exiting.

[Chick McGee]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

Then you take the leaf blower and you blow everything. I do it all the time.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Because that. And there's a lot of dog hair. But if you use my system, where you've got the big.

[Christy Lee]

It's in your yard.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

I. I would think sweeping would be fine.

[Josh Arnold]

I would think.

[Christy Lee]

Or maybe one of those old handheld.

[Tom Griswold]

The dander and stuff kind of floats around. It's a good system.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

And I'm actually looking into getting a good. I'm looking into getting a more powerful leaf blower.

[Josh Arnold]

What is your.

[Tom Griswold]

I want to get one of those.

[Josh Arnold]

Other things of your sister.

[Chick McGee]

She must.

[Tom Griswold]

It's. There are problems. I got in trouble the other day because I. There are problems. Of course there are. I wanted to buy. Do you guys know the names of the plastic tips on your shoelaces?

[Chick McGee]

I forget.

[Christy Lee]

It's like agate or something.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Aglet, I believe. Well, yeah, I wanted to replace some of those because, as you know, I have a puppy.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And the puppy will chew on the shoelaces.

[Chick McGee]

I get it.

[Christy Lee]

So there's nothing wrong with the lace.

[Tom Griswold]

No. But the aglets are.

[Chick McGee]

Those are satisfying to chew on if you've ever owned a hoodie with those.

[Tom Griswold]

So I wanted to buy some aglets. Someone online, and this is quite interesting. You can buy them by the thousands.

[Chick McGee]

I would think That I would almost guess that's the only way to buy them.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. I would think the people who make manufacturing those, if they don't sell them by.

[Chick McGee]

They assume you're a cobbler of some.

[Tom Griswold]

But they're. They're mostly metal. And you have to have this crimping device.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, right, right.

[Tom Griswold]

And I didn't want to do that. So I googled what's the best way to do this?

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

And there's a thing. And I bought. I already.

[Christy Lee]

It doesn't involve a leaf blower.

[Tom Griswold]

Does it close Said go to the.

[Chick McGee]

Store and buy shoelaces.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, no, no.

[Christy Lee]

That.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't want to do that because how am I going to get the. I can't get the color to match. For example, these blue shoes I've got on. And the. The aglets are all chewy on this other one. In any event, don't you have a shoe guy?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, we do have a shoe guy.

[Tom Griswold]

I got a shoe from leather shoes. Yes, I do. Great guy.

[Josh Arnold]

Great guy.

[Chick McGee]

He has no aglets.

[Tom Griswold]

I bet he does.

[Chick McGee]

He has aglets.

[Tom Griswold]

But how do you crimp them? He does crimper. You give him a buck or two. I am a handyman when it comes to.

[Christy Lee]

I'm guessing the ones you want are somehow you heat them up and they shrink to the legs.

[Tom Griswold]

Exactly. So what you get is you get this. This rubber tubing stuff.

[Christy Lee]

I feel like I'm talking down a.

[Tom Griswold]

Guy at an insane asylum. It's so cool. Josh. It's this kit and they have these things the size of matchsticks, and you slip them over the existing aglet. Or if it's all. If it's chewed up, you cut it off. And then you put in. And then there's a little tiny little heating device.

[Chick McGee]

Well, how about that whole aglet? Three hours later you have a new shoelace. Oh, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

It only cost you more than the shoe.

[Tom Griswold]

The kit. You got the kit. The kit. The kit was like 20 bucks. And then you can also. You have a hoodie that has a chewy afraid thingy.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Lace. You wordmeister. You lace.

[Chick McGee]

That really is an item for a part time cobbler.

[Tom Griswold]

That is a.

[Chick McGee]

Somebody who has an Etsy store.

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

That's making.

[Tom Griswold]

So. So I told Kelly this because the package. I usually get my packages delivered somewhere else, of course, because I don't like answering questions.

[Chick McGee]

I don't blame you.

[Tom Griswold]

So she goes, what's this thing? Because while they were gone last week, I had it delivered, but it was on my desk what's this thing? And I said, oh, this is my thing, my little machine, so I can replace the aglets. Then I said, do you have any aglets that need to replace? And she goes, if I did, I wouldn't tell you. Put that away.

[Chick McGee]

Absolutely no interest, one sane person in that hassle.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

It's a great system, though, if anyone wants to bring in some shoelaces.

[Josh Arnold]

Did you use it?

[Tom Griswold]

I haven't had time. I may have to stop at our cobbler's place.

[Josh Arnold]

So you haven't even used it, so you don't know if it's a great system.

[Tom Griswold]

I saw it online. I watched the video on YouTube.

[Christy Lee]

I just about can't stand it.

[Tom Griswold]

I'll try to use this.

[Chick McGee]

I want you to open up like. Sort of like a lemonade stand in your neighborhood and just sit out there at a table with that kit. Aglet repair.

[Tom Griswold]

That's right.

[Christy Lee]

Five cents.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

At five cents, you might make some money. I think the aglets are like 420.

[Chick McGee]

For a dog, I think you could charge five bucks. They all have dogs, too, in the neighborhood. You might make a buck.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, my goodness.

[Tom Griswold]

And I always feel bad for the shoeshine guy at the airport because, you know, nobody's wearing leather shoes anymore. So when I do wear leather shoes, I always go there and get a quick shine.

[Christy Lee]

See?

[Chick McGee]

I always feel bad when they have to shine somebody's shoes. You feel bad when they're just sitting there. That's my goal.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, how are they making money if they're just.

[Tom Griswold]

They want to make money.

[Josh Arnold]

I mean, come on.

[Chick McGee]

Do they?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, sure. I always tip very heavily.

[Chick McGee]

I know you do. Yes, but.

[Christy Lee]

Can't stand it.

[Tom Griswold]

In fact, last time, I think I took a photograph of the guy shining my shoes and sent it to you guys.

[Chick McGee]

You did? Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, that was.

[Tom Griswold]

Those shoes look great.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Your brown shoes are nice. That guy, he puts on rubber gloves so he can, you know, he just really rub that stuff in.

[Josh Arnold]

I think Kelly hates those shoes.

[Chick McGee]

Are these Buster Browns new?

[Tom Griswold]

She does hate those shirts. And she was with me when I picked him out, and I always point that out, and she does. That doesn't. Doesn't do any good. Don't you think it's. Don't you think it's only fair if you're with your significant other and you go, do you like this shirt? Yeah, get that one. Then you get it. And she goes, you're going to wear that? Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

That isn't fair.

[Tom Griswold]

You were there when I bought it.

[Greg Warren]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

That is Kind of bad.

[Tom Griswold]

This is a Sid Mashburn. She goes, I don't care about Sid Mashburn.

[Josh Arnold]

Who's Sid Mashburn?

[Christy Lee]

Who knows some guy who sells shirts on the corner?

[Tom Griswold]

This is a Sid M is a fine design. Minor.

[Christy Lee]

There's lemonade stand and there's sids and aglet repair.

[Tom Griswold]

And this is a Pierre Peter Millar. I don't care. It's unbelievable. So anyway, I guess we have to do sports later.

[Chick McGee]

You know what? It's good to know, though, if we ever need an aglet repaired. Yeah. We've got a guy now.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. I almost bought the.

[Chick McGee]

How you ever.

[Tom Griswold]

With the crimper. I almost bought that.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

This is much more efficient.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Really something.

[Tom Griswold]

Got a little machine, probably set the house on fire. Don't leave on your aglet heater, but it comes with the kit. Has like all different sizes of these little tubes. Josh.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

So I could do a big thick lace.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Or almost a rope. Okay.

[Chick McGee]

So what's your car cleaning hack again?

[Tom Griswold]

My car cleaning hack is take your car outside, you open up all the doors, take a leaf blower and blow all the dust out of it and all the stuff under the seats and the gum wrappers. Don't you take a broom, clean your yard. It's easy as pie.

[Chick McGee]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

The blows in the grass. Take a rake. This is brilliant.

[Chick McGee]

And people are writing and saying, hey, yes, I too have done this or I will do this.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I have to have done this.

[Greg Warren]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Right, Jason, I just got the thumbs up. Absolutely.

[Christy Lee]

Really?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. It's a great move.

[Josh Arnold]

Jason's done this too.

[Tom Griswold]

Is that. I am about to upgrade. I'm going to. I am going to a bigger. I'm going to get a bigger leaf blower.

[Christy Lee]

You mean more power.

[Josh Arnold]

Do you have a gas powered leaf blower?

[Tom Griswold]

No, I have an electric one, but it's. But it's battery, right. Works for about five minutes that. It peters out, but five minutes. They have the.

[Christy Lee]

It works longer than that. Not mine.

[Tom Griswold]

They have the. I didn't get a good one. I've just been told what is the Echo brand is the one to get. I've been told ego.

[Christy Lee]

Ego.

[Chick McGee]

That's what I have.

[Tom Griswold]

Is that the backpack one?

[Josh Arnold]

No, no. Those are the gas ones, aren't they?

[Tom Griswold]

Typically, I may have to go gas.

[Christy Lee]

They make one.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, okay. Jason's saying that they do make a battery powered backpack one. I do not have the backpack one. And it's quite power because I want the big one. Okay. Tom, do not get the backpack. When. Why they. They burst into flames? Well, not always. I shouldn't, I shouldn't just say that. They, They're. But we've had stories where they've burst into flame. Really? The gasoline powered ones?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Because I do like to. When I, when I grill out. I'll take the leaf blower. You hit the charcoal with it. What?

[Chick McGee]

What?

[Tom Griswold]

Absolutely.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, my God.

[Tom Griswold]

You get the charcoal started.

[Josh Arnold]

You have embers flying over.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. That's. That's how forest fires begin.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Well, you're gonna get kicked out of your neighborhood.

[Christy Lee]

I think we're all glad that you live in the more or less moist.

[Chick McGee]

Midwest radio star burns down neighborhood.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, in any event, Tom, Ted from northeast Michigan, Tom is absolutely right about car cleaning. I've been cleaning all my big rigs and heavy equipment with compressed shop air for years.

[Tom Griswold]

All right.

[Josh Arnold]

10 times faster than any vacuum.

[Chick McGee]

Now that. But all. Doesn't. That, that's. And big heavy equipment and compressed air. Of course.

[Tom Griswold]

That's all this discussion started because you. I asked if I could borrow your car.

[Greg Warren]

Right.

[Chick McGee]

And you can.

[Tom Griswold]

And, and you said, well, the dashboard's filthy and full of dust.

[Josh Arnold]

Why do you want to borrow everybody's car?

[Christy Lee]

You have a car.

[Tom Griswold]

I got a 2. Take it to the shop. The point is, Josh, I'm just saying if you take your car.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

You could at least get the top layer of dust off of the leaf blower.

[Chick McGee]

I would rather just dust. I don't. I feel like blowing the dust around. And I also feel like having my car wide open with a leaf blower in the. Is going to blow dust into it as well.

[Josh Arnold]

I keep a microfiber cloth in my car.

[Chick McGee]

I have trouble.

[Josh Arnold]

Wipe it off.

[Chick McGee]

I have trouble touching microfiber.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I know. I do, too.

[Chick McGee]

It's the worst feeling fabric on the planet.

[Josh Arnold]

I agree.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. That is also, I have a bunch of tiny, tiny pieces of fishing line all over my, my hatchback area because I will change bait, I'll change lures while I'm shore fishing in the back of my car. So I don't want that to blow around in the yard and stuff like that.

[Tom Griswold]

This is just lying there.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Just little pieces that I pick up whenever I see your car. Smell like fish some days.

[Ace Cosby]

Well, coming up next on this Thanksgiving morning, brace yourself. It's Greg Hunt. He's in studio and he's coming up next. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Josh Arnold]

Hi there.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm Nicole Khalil, host of this is Woman's Work. Where Together, we're redefining what it means, what it looks and feels like to be doing woman's work in the world today.

[Jess Hooker]

From boardrooms to studios kitchens to coding dens, we explore the multifaceted experiences of today's woman, confirming that the new definition is whatever feels true and right and real for you.

[Tom Griswold]

We're torching the old playbook and writing our own rules. Who runs the world? You decide. Follow and listen to this. Is woman's work part of the Believe network on your favorite platform?

[Ace Cosby]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom show on this Thursday morning. This is Christopher in the Bob and Tom Studios. Happy Thanksgiving from all of us here at the Bob and Tom Show. How about a segment with comedian Greg Hahn?

[Christy Lee]

I'm Chick McGee. And here's Tom Griswold with Bob and Tom, comedy legend in the. In the. The studio.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, we're so lucky. A man who is a. Just a walking stick of joy.

[Christy Lee]

All right, wait a minute.

[Tom Griswold]

That didn't come out right. He is a he. He embodies his show's real funny. That's what I meant to say. He is comedian Greg Hahn. He is the. The proud owner of a new condo in Florida.

[Chick McGee]

Penthouse one, baby. Penthouse one. Oh, you got number one. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Right next to number two. Yeah, you will.

[Tom Griswold]

You're in the penthouse.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, we got a hot crowd listening to us today. I can tell. I can feel it.

[Tom Griswold]

Hot crowd.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Good.

[Chick McGee]

Make sure at work you walk around looking serious. Have a grimace like you're in the weeds. You know what I mean? I wasn't serious. That's how I got kicked out of the corporate world. My clip on tie used to squirt. No, that's far too silly. Yeah, is Allie Breen calling in today? Yeah, I'm all excited.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, that ought to be fun.

[Tom Griswold]

Gotta use the push pull with the girls.

[Chick McGee]

The push pull?

[Tom Griswold]

What's.

[Chick McGee]

Well, you get her number, then tell her she's been blocked.

[Tom Griswold]

I see.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, they love that. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Talk about hard to get. I mean, right away, Greg Khan was a distinguished member of the United States Marine Corps. And then one thing led to another and it was an honorable discharge, certainly.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah. Outstanding.

[Tom Griswold]

I love the Marine Corps.

[Chick McGee]

I should have been a pilot. That's the thing, really. I should have been a pilot. Wouldn't have been great. I'd be flying for Delta by now. Wouldn't that be great?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

My announcements would be fun, you know.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, good name.

[Chick McGee]

This is Commander Han. Call sign Grim reaper. We've had 1500 aircraft carrier landings, 47 confirmed kills. We're coming in hot. Bogeys on our six. Keep your civilian trash in the overhead bins. Stay out of my lavatory. Shot to Jack on the house. Get your seat belts off. Get up and mingle.

[Tom Griswold]

Help.

[Chick McGee]

Shut up.

[Tom Griswold]

That would be great.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

That would be so funny. Yeah. I am, I think, in a minority. I like it when the flight attendants do the. They do this. They sing or whatever.

[Christy Lee]

They try to do comedy.

[Tom Griswold]

I think it's great.

[Christy Lee]

You like that?

[Tom Griswold]

I do.

[Chick McGee]

What do you like about that?

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, as you were setting up your last thing, people are so somber and.

[Chick McGee]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

And I was on a. I was on a flight. What? I can't say that when the plane lands, everybody stands up at the same time, even, and they say, you're not going anywhere.

[Chick McGee]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

I was on a flight once where someone had to be taken to a hospital immediately. And the pilot came across and he said, you know, ladies and gentlemen, we have an emergency. Stay in your seats. And of course, the plane lands, landed at Denver Airport, and everyone immediately stood up. The pilot was furious. And he got him to all sit back again. You know, come on, you know, we're here together, folks. There's an emergency. Sit the f down. Okay. Right. But. Yeah, but I like the flight attendants there, but that's hard work. Chick's daughter was a flight attendant. It's a difficult job.

[Christy Lee]

Almost lost her mind.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. I can't even imagine how.

[Tom Griswold]

And to this day, the last time I saw Chick's daughter, I went over to their house. She only gave me half of my coke when I ordered it. It's just force of habit.

[Christy Lee]

Is that all she is? Comedy fodder?

[Tom Griswold]

No, you're defodder. I'm just a friend. I'm trying my best.

[Christy Lee]

We planned all that. It's a absolutely. Playing.

[Tom Griswold]

This is a tough crowd.

[Chick McGee]

How about Tom?

[Christy Lee]

Tom?

[Chick McGee]

What about first class? You ever get bumped up to first class? Get that hot towel. Ooh, what are you supposed to do with that thing after you jam it down your shorts? Did you ever fly in uniform, Greg?

[Tom Griswold]

No.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, okay. I don't think so. Not that I recall. My dad was in the army and he. When he did, he said that oftentimes we get bumped up to first class.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah, that's good. Smart move. I like that very much.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, it is a nice.

[Josh Arnold]

He deserved it.

[Chick McGee]

The airline should do. That's great. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Now.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. I'm a big flying fan. Love it. I love to fly. Love to love all the great people working there. Thank you. So much.

[Chick McGee]

That's right.

[Tom Griswold]

Even the TSA people. Thank you. It's the people that are. That go in there with, like, an attitude that I can't stand, and you get the guy in front of you. I'm not going to mention any names. They. Can you open up your case? Why don't you open it? Oh, great.

[Christy Lee]

Right, right, right.

[Tom Griswold]

We're going to be here all day. You know who I'm talking.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I know who you're talking about.

[Chick McGee]

TSA can be a little. I got in trouble just for singing when I was going through there. Really? It was like. Yeah, singing bom bom bom bom in my bag.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Nothing like a few jokes.

[Chick McGee]

Real bad. I'm just singing a song here, pal.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, please, just behave yourself. Have some fun. Live a little.

[Chick McGee]

I tried.

[Tom Griswold]

Now Christie Lee is over there with her bangs looking beautiful, and I stepped on you earlier.

[Chick McGee]

Please. Christy Lee, what's in the news?

[Christy Lee]

Well done, Greg.

[Tom Griswold]

Or in lieu of that, what's funny in the news?

[Josh Arnold]

A Connecticut woman. I don't know if this is funny. It's kind of creepy. Is suing the Chopped Eatery chain, claiming a salad she received contained a piece of a severed finger.

[Chick McGee]

Oh.

[Josh Arnold]

A lawsuit filed by Ms. Allison Co alleges she bought a salad at a Chopped location in Mount Kisco, New York, realized while eating that she was chewing on a portion of a human finger that had been mixed in.

[Chick McGee]

She was chewing it.

[Tom Griswold]

I didn't want the finger food.

[Chick McGee]

The finger food.

[Josh Arnold]

According to the suit, a manager at the restaurant accidentally severed a piece of her left pointer finger while chopping arugula.

[Chick McGee]

Oh. Usually you leave a tip, you don't get one.

[Josh Arnold]

Cozy. Claims she has suffered shock, panic attacks, migraines, cognitive impairment.

[Chick McGee]

Now she's alive.

[Josh Arnold]

Nausea, dizziness, and neck as well as shoulder pain as a result of eating the contaminated salad. She's seeking unspecified monetary damages. The manager went to the hospital, but the suit states that the contaminated arugula was served to customers. Westchester County Health Department records show that chopped was fined $900 for the incident.

[Chick McGee]

Wow.

[Tom Griswold]

When I worked at the restaurant, we had a table we called the Monster. It was the. There was this one really gigantic table, and you'd have, you know, whole families there. Twelve people could sit at the Monster.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And one evening, a woman at the. At the Monster pulled a band aid out of her Monster mouth.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, no.

[Tom Griswold]

With blood on it.

[Christy Lee]

All right. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Because. Yeah, that was awful. But it'll happen. The thing is, you're. If you. As you know, this You've worked in a restaurant, Pat. You're supposed to put a. They actually call it a or whatever on your finger.

[Josh Arnold]

Finger condoms.

[Tom Griswold]

Like a. Yeah, like a finger condom. If you cut yourself.

[Greg Warren]

Thimble.

[Josh Arnold]

That's.

[Tom Griswold]

But you think. You think when the woman cut the tip of her finger off, you would immediately go, oh, okay, A, find the tip of the finger.

[Josh Arnold]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

And B, throw that. Throw that one away.

[Christy Lee]

What do they call the finger cover?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, it was called a finger.

[Chick McGee]

Absolutely no way. It was called.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, that may have been a nickname, but that's what we called it.

[Chick McGee]

Well, that's fine. No, we want to start getting. I mean, that's. That's some. That's some muddy water if you want a nickname. But that's what we call. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

You won't hear that term in a hospital, I can tell you that.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm not saying some of the guys there probably could have used it for one. No, but really, that's. You had to do that. If you. If you. You can't have a band aid on in a kitchen. You have to wear a glove or whatever.

[Josh Arnold]

Sure.

[Tom Griswold]

But cutting your finger off and leaving it in the cell, that's a bad move.

[Josh Arnold]

But it doesn't cause all those symptoms. I'm sorry, I'm no doctor.

[Chick McGee]

Shoulder pain.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah. Come on.

[Chick McGee]

You get nothing now, lady.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I'm.

[Chick McGee]

You ruined it.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, she'll get something.

[Tom Griswold]

They'll be a big. There'll be a big check. But I mean, the place is called.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I know. There is a joke there, right?

[Tom Griswold]

No, I said chicken fin. I mean, it's certainly gross out, obviously.

[Chick McGee]

But arugula tastes bad as is.

[Josh Arnold]

I agree.

[Chick McGee]

I'm a fan. But it's a. It's got a bitter.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, you can always. Yeah, you add arugula to something, right? Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

You add it to a garbage can and that way it doesn't tickle your throat as it goes.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I get that. Spinach arugula mix. I love it. What about parmesan cheese on top? Doesn't save it a little bit.

[Josh Arnold]

A little bit.

[Tom Griswold]

Loves it.

[Chick McGee]

Is it good for you at least? Why are we eating it?

[Josh Arnold]

My daughter likes it a lot. She puts it in everything.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Oh, it's easy to get. They just go to a roadside and take a weed eater.

[Josh Arnold]

I agree, but is it good for you? Oh, yeah. Just agree.

[Tom Griswold]

Mr. Han, did you know that Mr. Godwin is now a vegan?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I didn't know that.

[Josh Arnold]

Have arugula.

[Chick McGee]

Arugula's on the diet. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

You know what?

[Chick McGee]

Here's the bro. Spinning vegan. I, I'm. I feel, I feel bad for Pat.

[Tom Griswold]

Why?

[Chick McGee]

Because vegans get a bad rap of. Oh, all vegans ever talk about is the fact that they're vegan. Pat doesn't mention it. Tom mentions the fact that Pat's.

[Tom Griswold]

That's because I go to the green room and that's all I hear about.

[Chick McGee]

I'm not.

[Tom Griswold]

I can't put that in my coffee. Well, if you're not, can't eat that. Go ahead, eat it in front of me.

[Chick McGee]

Well, you were. You were dropping cubed steak into his coffee. He's not supposed to have that.

[Tom Griswold]

It is delicious. And it wasn't like a fingertip or anything.

[Chick McGee]

He wants to be nice to animals. That's very good. No, no, it's all about that. I'm an animal though, you know what I mean? When I bite into something that looks like a hamburger and all of a sudden it's banana chips. That's kind of torture.

[Tom Griswold]

Do you have those dried banana chip snacks? Is that what you're eating, Pat?

[Chick McGee]

No, those are good fried plantains. I'll try those though.

[Tom Griswold]

Fried plantains?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Oh yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I am a big fan of horses, but I am not a big fan of horses in an urban setting. Towing lovers around in downtown areas like.

[Chick McGee]

The so called handsome cats.

[Christy Lee]

I don't like those.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't like those. I just like Central park where they're beautiful little characters.

[Christy Lee]

What if it's in a sleigh? How about that instead of the wheels?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, if it's out in the country, that's fine.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Chick McGee]

No, last Saturday when we were downtown for the concert, we got behind one of those.

[Tom Griswold]

True. And I respect the people that I know. They love their horses.

[Josh Arnold]

See the Christmas lights? It's romantic.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but were you in the back.

[Christy Lee]

Seat saying, I say, Ace, what's the hold up up there? What is taking so long? Ace, Answer me.

[Chick McGee]

Ace.

[Tom Griswold]

Ace wasn't driving.

[Christy Lee]

Are you sure?

[Tom Griswold]

Ace and I went to see the Kiss concert.

[Josh Arnold]

Can you imagine?

[Tom Griswold]

It was awesome. They were great. But there's a story about New York.

[Josh Arnold]

City police officers rescued a horse that had broken free of its carriage. In Manhattan, wabc, we are the first.

[Christy Lee]

Television station alphabetically reports that the incident.

[Josh Arnold]

Began when the carriage malfunctioned and the driver tried to fix it. The 15 year old horse named Gunner became agitated and dragged the carriage as it made a run for it down west side highway, injuring the driver. The horse smashed the carriage into four parked cars before disengaging and running onto the highway where it slipped and fell.

[Christy Lee]

All right. Horse.

[Tom Griswold]

Awful. Terrible too.

[Josh Arnold]

Off duty officers were able to load gunner onto a trailer and take him to Clinton park stables for further evaluation.

[Christy Lee]

Go ahead. Yeah, get on. Let's get up here in this. We'll take you over back and put you in a bed. Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Actually, police said the horse did sustain multiple injuries but is expected to recover.

[Tom Griswold]

He's in stable condition.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, sorry.

[Tom Griswold]

He'll be fine. I'm not sure for long.

[Josh Arnold]

Aw, man.

[Christy Lee]

I feel like we've been here before.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, we have.

[Tom Griswold]

No, but this is terrible.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, it is.

[Tom Griswold]

This horse is on the west side Highway.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, Got loose.

[Tom Griswold]

It's awful.

[Chick McGee]

I don't know why you're such a naysayer.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, God. For chick.

[Christy Lee]

And there's no turning around now, is there? Go ahead.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you see the horse ran in front of a cab.

[Chick McGee]

No, I didn't.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm trotting here. Hey, we just got a little midnight cowboy joke for you.

[Chick McGee]

Just got a call from Tony the yodeling Shetland pony. Yeah, can't be here tonight. He's a little horse. Come on.

[Christy Lee]

A boo. Scattered booze. Too late.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't just always. I just. I just bug.

[Josh Arnold]

So you've never had a carriage ride?

[Chick McGee]

I always feel strong.

[Josh Arnold]

Carriage ride?

[Tom Griswold]

Not in an urban setting. No, I. I just don't. I feel in Central Park.

[Chick McGee]

Is it okay there you go around the tavern.

[Josh Arnold]

I mean, that's their job. They have a job to do.

[Chick McGee]

They know they're beasts of burden. They like it.

[Tom Griswold]

No.

[Chick McGee]

Do they like it? Yes.

[Greg Warren]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

They live to serve.

[Josh Arnold]

They. Yes, the Clydesdales were.

[Tom Griswold]

Workhorses are an exception.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, really?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I told you that story. We were having dinner with the guys from Anheuser Bush, and we were asking about the Clydesdales, and the one guy said, if reincarnation is a thing, I want to come back as a Clydesdales. Clydesdale because they're. They treat me better than my wife.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, that's a Budweiser. What about the other Working.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. What about the Clydesdales in the wild?

[Josh Arnold]

What about those guys?

[Chick McGee]

What about the way horses can read your mind? Isn't that amazing?

[Tom Griswold]

You get on there and they all.

[Chick McGee]

They could sense if you're scared.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I'm terrorized.

[Chick McGee]

Big teeth, skinny legs and a lot of muscles. What's going on with that thing? Real tall and fast.

[Christy Lee]

Amazing, muscled creatures along the cliff.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, I hope it's happy.

[Tom Griswold]

Louise.

[Chick McGee]

It.

[Josh Arnold]

You got grumpy horse today. Oh, yeah, right.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, well. Okay, let's move on what else?

[Christy Lee]

By the way, Tom, we've got many, many emails coming in. Many, many. Apparently what you had when you worked in the restaurant business, they weren't finger cocks, they're finger cots. C O D O T. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, we called them finger cocks.

[Chick McGee]

I have no doubt that you did.

[Christy Lee]

I have no doubt you did. The people that manufacture them call them finger cots.

[Tom Griswold]

Actually makes them worse. I bet the people working on the assembly line call them finger cocks. Once again, if you. This was a story about someone who cut the tip of their finger off. And when you, when you get a bad cut in a restaurant, you've got to put this like condom thing on it, then put on gloves.

[Chick McGee]

What about these restaurants?

[Tom Griswold]

Go ahead.

[Chick McGee]

These restaurants where the guy walks up, says, careful, the plate is hot, right? Yeah. What I do, you put your hand right on it. That you're a man among men.

[Christy Lee]

That's right.

[Tom Griswold]

Your plate is hot but your date is not.

[Chick McGee]

A cup of ice. You wanted to go back for her head.

[Greg Warren]

That's a good one.

[Josh Arnold]

A Vietnamese man was reportedly unaware that he had a pair of chopsticks lodged in his brain for five months.

[Christy Lee]

In his brain?

[Josh Arnold]

Yep. According to Vietnam vn, the unnamed man was taken to a hospital after suffering severe headaches.

[Chick McGee]

I bet.

[Josh Arnold]

Fluid discharge and loss of vision. A CAT scan revealed a set of broken chopsticks that were penetrating his skull from his nose.

[Chick McGee]

How?

[Josh Arnold]

Well, thank you for asking, Josh. The family believes the chopsticks made their way up the guys nose when he was involved in a fight five months prior.

[Chick McGee]

Good lord.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm guessing it was double.

[Josh Arnold]

Saman is now recovering after undergoing surgery to remove said chopsticks. The patient told doctors he didn't remember exactly what happened in the fight.

[Christy Lee]

I don't remember.

[Josh Arnold]

Although he said he thought something had been stabbed into his face.

[Chick McGee]

I think so.

[Josh Arnold]

I think you'd remember that.

[Tom Griswold]

It's also. They took him to a hospital when the fight occurred and they didn't see them in there.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, man, that's crazy.

[Tom Griswold]

I want to check his ass, make sure there's nothing in there. Even if the guy took the time and trouble to break off some chopsticks in his nose. How drunk do you have to be, man?

[Josh Arnold]

Pretty drunk, I would think.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know. I keep my chopsticks in my junk drawer. I've got like 50 of them.

[Chick McGee]

Oh yeah. Just from taking.

[Tom Griswold]

I think probably the greatest waste in North America is when you get any kind of Chinese food to go and.

[Josh Arnold]

They give you all chopsticks.

[Tom Griswold]

They give you like seven chopsticks and 40 soy sauce things.

[Chick McGee]

I always just thought they were making fun of me for being fat. I'd open up the bag, there'd be four chopsticks. All right, this is for one person. Sarcastic bastards.

[Tom Griswold]

Have you ever, on the phone, faked it?

[Chick McGee]

I have faked it. Yes. I faked it in a drive through not two weeks ago.

[Tom Griswold]

What'd you do?

[Chick McGee]

We'd like a. We, like, who am I fooling? I'm pulling up and they just see me.

[Josh Arnold]

You could be taking it home. Yeah, exactly.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, that's what I'm hoping. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah. Did you do the fake conversation?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

I'd like a Big Mac. And would you want a fish sandwich? And a fish sandwich.

[Chick McGee]

And. Oh, two holiday pies. Mike. She's hungry, fellow. Sorry. Two holiday pies. She's sleeping in the backseat. Don't worry about it. She'll be hungry.

[Ace Cosby]

Coming up on the Bob and Tom show, some Christmas wrapping and weird and dangerous toys. You're gonna want to listen. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Josh Arnold]

Bob and Tom, you met Lala Kent on Vanderpump Rules. Now Lala and her friends share everything on Give them Lala Bagel. Everybody says.

[Tom Griswold]

I say that weird.

[Josh Arnold]

It has ruined my proposal story. How'd you.

[Tom Griswold]

And she was like, he brought in.

[H]

A bunch of bagels.

[Tom Griswold]

I was like, I have to stop.

[Josh Arnold]

I will punch you in the throat if you ever tell this story again and call it a begle.

[Tom Griswold]

Let me tell you now, when I tell the story, I go. He went.

[Josh Arnold]

And got breakfast.

[Christy Lee]

There you go.

[Chick McGee]

Bagels.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Watch what Lala is talking about on YouTube or search for Give them Lala. Wherever you listen.

[Ace Cosby]

More of the Bob and Tom show on this Thursday morning. Welcome back. This is Christopher in the Bob and Tom studios. We're talking Christmas already. Some Christmas wrapping and weird and dangerous toys.

[Christy Lee]

Okay. All right. Welcome back to the Bob and Tom show. And this is my favorite rejoin music. Hello, Tom. How are you, bud?

[Tom Griswold]

Chick.

[Christy Lee]

Yes, sir.

[Tom Griswold]

Coming up, we got Josh's Christmas present.

[Chick McGee]

My goodness.

[Tom Griswold]

Early. I know it's early, but you'll see.

[Christy Lee]

Is it too large to carry?

[Tom Griswold]

No, you can carry it.

[Chick McGee]

Wow.

[Christy Lee]

Is it wrapped?

[Chick McGee]

Yes, wrapped.

[Tom Griswold]

It is wrapped.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, wow.

[Tom Griswold]

In very special wrapping paper.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, boy. What have I done to deserve this?

[Christy Lee]

Did you wrap?

[Josh Arnold]

You've always been his favorite.

[Tom Griswold]

I, I, we, I directed it to be wrapped.

[Christy Lee]

Well, that's the thought that counts.

[Josh Arnold]

Is Amy did it.

[Chick McGee]

You guys, remember, we're in the presence of one of the finest gift wrappers.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, Chick, ladies and gentlemen.

[Chick McGee]

Some ridiculous.

[Josh Arnold]

How good.

[Christy Lee]

I don't like to brag, but. But it's absolutely the truth.

[Tom Griswold]

Chick's one of those guys that can. When he's done wrapping, there's no scrap.

[Chick McGee]

It's amazing.

[Tom Griswold]

He does some kind of weird 3D eyeball thing where he knows exactly how much to.

[Christy Lee]

I'm taking it to another level. There's a community online you can wrap presents without using tape. I like that very much.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, that's.

[Christy Lee]

I've seen videos of that tucking in and things and.

[Josh Arnold]

Seriously?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yes. Oh.

[Chick McGee]

Are you able to do that now? Oh, yes.

[Tom Griswold]

What?

[Christy Lee]

But I will tell you this because. Because of my previous speech I had about, I don't want to give you guys anything for Christmas, but I have to because it's sitting at the house compound. I'm sorry. I don't think I'm gonna wrap the gifts this year. I'm just gonna tie them up with twine and.

[Tom Griswold]

Sure.

[Josh Arnold]

I wasn't gonna wrap mine either.

[Chick McGee]

That's okay. Yeah. Especially good game about wrapping.

[Christy Lee]

And now you don't want to wrap them. Oh, wait a minute. Hold up. Oh, well, it's peer pressure. Wait a minute. Oh, that's right. You're not appear. But anyway, now I have a question. What happened? Am I out?

[Tom Griswold]

My. My mother grew up during the depression.

[Christy Lee]

And let me start this story off with. My mother grew up during the depression.

[Tom Griswold]

I'll talk to those people that are sensitive out there. And so when we would unwrap gifts, she would save the paper. Yes. They had to be unwrapped.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

So this thing without tape would have. She would have loved this.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Because you could have.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Preserve the. Preserve the paper.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, she would have loved the bag thing, because you can always save those every year.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't think so. I really. The bag thing, to me, is the lazy person's way out.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, it's great.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't like the bag.

[Chick McGee]

You pay for it, though. They're a little pricier.

[Josh Arnold]

They are. But you can reuse them over.

[Christy Lee]

I'm wrapping it up with twine. And here you go.

[Tom Griswold]

See the whole thing?

[Josh Arnold]

I like the twine thing.

[Tom Griswold]

See, what I do at my. What I do at my house, as you may or may not remember where the presents are under the tree, then the entry to that room, we seal with paper, and then when it's time for the girls to come in, they burst through like the beginning of a football game where they jump through the paper ring.

[Chick McGee]

So you see that Santa has Arrived and you go, okay, let's seal off the window.

[Tom Griswold]

Exactly.

[Josh Arnold]

Does Santa wrap all of the presents?

[Tom Griswold]

Of course.

[Josh Arnold]

No. Some houses, Santa didn't have time to wrap all the presents.

[Christy Lee]

I was always told, well, well, the elves.

[Tom Griswold]

The strike that the elves went on was coincided with the actors strike. And the elves are back. They're rapping right now. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

I always thought the parents told Santa, hey, you can rap, please rap or don't rap. I was told my parents told him, don't rap.

[Christy Lee]

That the presents were empty until Santa came and filled them.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, that's a cute thing.

[Christy Lee]

They were under that.

[Tom Griswold]

There's all kinds of magic that Santa can do. I think we have some Santa fans listening. The point being, right? I think it's. It's much nicer to have something to unwrap.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Christy Lee]

You know, if anybody come, goes to their parents and says, I know all about Santa. I heard it on the Bob and Tom show. I think they've got bigger problems than Santa.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm just saying. No, this is a spoiler alert. Don't ruin it.

[Chick McGee]

My parents would ask Santa to not only not wrap the gifts, but to assemble some.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, so would mine.

[Chick McGee]

So under the tree there'd be the full bicycle. He man castle. And yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Remember one Christmas morning, me and the little tykes people went round and round about how to remember the slide they made.

[Chick McGee]

I love the people would stand up and go down.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, yeah. The kids could actually get up there in the slide and slide.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, that thing.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, it was like yellow and red.

[Josh Arnold]

Sure.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, that piece of. Son of a.

[Chick McGee]

Those classic.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, boy.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, there's an old.

[Christy Lee]

I was wrestled with in the middle of the floor with that damn thing.

[Tom Griswold]

There's a there people that have a side gig of assembling stuff for other people.

[Chick McGee]

It's a great.

[Josh Arnold]

They sure do.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

You know, that's the number one selling car in the history of the world is the little Tykes car.

[Tom Griswold]

Really?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, it's absolutely red and yellow.

[Chick McGee]

Deal.

[Christy Lee]

And the number one selling car in the history of the world is the.

[Tom Griswold]

Little T. Have they cracked down now on the commercials for toys? I remember when I was a kid, I remember there was a commercial for the vacuum form where you could make your own toys. This thing heated up to a way too hot temperature, set the house on fire. And you could make these really crappy little plastic things. But in the commercial, of course, they're making planes that fly.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, I don't remember that toy. But yeah, we had creepy crawlers. Remember that? You can make.

[Tom Griswold]

Yep.

[Christy Lee]

Bugs had the incredible time machine where they're little plastic pieces of square plastic. You put them in. You put them in the. This heating thing that, as Tom said, it got, I don't know, 6, 700 degrees.

[Tom Griswold]

It makes the house smell like burn plastic.

[Christy Lee]

And you put it in there and turn it on and it would. The monster would pop out of the square of plastic and then you'd heat it back up in the same super heated thing. And when it got all gooey, you stuffed it back into this, this masher that would mash it back down into a cube. It was kind of. It was a.

[Tom Griswold]

That's fun.

[Christy Lee]

It was a good time.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I loved it. Just I can remember looking back. Do they have anything that dangerous anymore?

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, remember the chemistry sets? I think those got a little scary.

[Tom Griswold]

How does the easy bake oven with light bulb. I know with current light bulb technology, an LED doesn't get hot enough to really cook that pork tartare into something edible, does it?

[Josh Arnold]

The brownie that took eight hours to cook. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

And you had to use your real oven for Shrinky Dinks.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes. Yeah, we had Shrinky Dinks.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, we had those two.

[Christy Lee]

I had Shrinky Dinks. I didn't care for them.

[Josh Arnold]

I didn't either.

[Chick McGee]

They were never as cool as you.

[Christy Lee]

Want them to be and they all get all warped.

[Tom Griswold]

Speaking of Shrinky Dinks, we have. You can substitute one letter. We have a story about a shrinking or something involving penis.

[Christy Lee]

Shrinking. Peace.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, that would be the subtle way. Yes, we'll get to that coming up here.

[Christy Lee]

Wait a minute. I got a picture of the incredible time machine. Hang on.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, well, in the meantime we also have.

[Christy Lee]

See that dome? That's where you did all your heating up.

[Chick McGee]

And just a kiln.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, it's a hundred and million degrees in that thing.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Babies first killed.

[Josh Arnold]

What did Tim Wilson used to always say? We didn't give a care about kids back then.

[Tom Griswold]

Let's. Let's burn down.

[Christy Lee]

A Swedish cross country skier sustained an injury to his male member after competing in a race in Finland. According to C CNN. This is CNN. He finished a 12 mile World cup event in Ruka. R U K A Not sure where that is.

[Chick McGee]

Skier Cali doesn't Ruka live on the second floor. Oh, that's Luca.

[Tom Griswold]

Sorry.

[Christy Lee]

Callie Halverson reported he suffered a frozen penis.

[Chick McGee]

Frozen penis.

[Christy Lee]

Temperatures had dropped to 5 degrees above zero at the start of the race. 34 year old told Swedish outlet. It's called a expressing. I have frozen my penis for real. All Right. According to that publication, he suffered the injury before. Despite the pain, he joked, it's lucky I'm about to have my second child because it's going to be difficult in the future if I'm going to continue like this. Halversand was the first Swede across the races. Finish line in 18th place, number one among the Swedes. When asked by Expressen if he could describe the sensation, Halvorson said, no. Those who know that know. But here's a tip from me. Stay away from it. It is the worst thing you can experience.

[Chick McGee]

I can't imagine.

[Josh Arnold]

Why in the world does he continue to compete?

[Christy Lee]

A frozen penis.

[Tom Griswold]

Whenever I go skiing, I always dip mine in hot chocolate before it helps. Doesn't really.

[Chick McGee]

Is that right?

[Tom Griswold]

No. Yeah, That's. That's the way I go. That's how. I wouldn't. I. Aren't you. They do make electric underwear or something.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, those little hand warmer things. Things you could stick down in there that you, you know, break open.

[Chick McGee]

And I have a tiny scar for mine.

[Christy Lee]

Tiny scarf.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Really wrap it around. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

The neck, if you will.

[Christy Lee]

Well, he went. He went 12 miles in 5 degree.

[Josh Arnold]

5 above a lot of other competitors. Did they freeze their penises?

[Tom Griswold]

Maybe they're using. Maybe there's a Swedish. Swedish product. I invented the Peter. He. Peter.

[Christy Lee]

Is that true?

[Tom Griswold]

To avoid the Venter Wiener.

[Christy Lee]

Venter Wiener. Peter.

[Josh Arnold]

He maybe has that disease, you know, some people have. I do. And it's real cold and your. The fingertips turn white.

[Chick McGee]

All right.

[Josh Arnold]

Reynards. Or whatever it is.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Maybe he has peanuts.

[Chick McGee]

Well, doesn't the penis kind of take care of itself in cold weather?

[Christy Lee]

Maybe he's so. Yeah, there's no room in this place.

[Josh Arnold]

Little Navy.

[Christy Lee]

Little mask.

[Tom Griswold]

He needs a little cap for it.

[Chick McGee]

Huh?

[Tom Griswold]

Little flap.

[Chick McGee]

Pat, what do you have to say about it?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, Pat.

[Josh Arnold]

You gotta get that.

[Chick McGee]

I have to do an update here. A skier on a mountain top.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, he was.

[Chick McGee]

BO Is frozen like an ice cream cone.

[Josh Arnold]

Now.

[Chick McGee]

Frostbite. Sinking in. His D is chilled to the ball. It's frozen. His member. It's frozen. I see. Penis start a fire. Situation dire. Oh, Father Penis. Get a heater for his Peter.

[Tom Griswold]

All right.

[Chick McGee]

That's about it.

[Christy Lee]

You know that sensation where when your hands start to get warm, there's kind of like needles?

[Chick McGee]

Yep.

[Christy Lee]

That has to be the same thing with your penis. Right?

[Chick McGee]

That's got to be terrible.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And need.

[Christy Lee]

Horrible.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

An unfortunate nickname.

[Chick McGee]

It is unfortunate.

[Tom Griswold]

This guy's nickname is Dick Chili.

[Chick McGee]

You know, there's a place down the street that serves Dick Chili. It's better than you'd think.

[Christy Lee]

With a name like Dick Chili, it's gotta be good.

[Ace Cosby]

Coming up next hour on the Bob and Tom show, comedian Greg Warren. And Tom was right. But next, some multiple Christmas trees and lots more. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Josh Arnold]

Bob and Tom.

[Ace Cosby]

Welcome back to the Bob and Tom show. And happy Thanksgiving from all of us here at the Bob and Tom Show. This is Christopher doing the best of Bob and Tom show here on this Thursday. How about some multiple Christmas trees and a pog stick? Let's find out about that.

[Christy Lee]

There's Josh Arnold. Hello back. It's alive. There's Ace Cosby. I'm Chick mcgee. Here's Tom Griswold, who over the weekend, big news. He and Ace went to the Kiss concert.

[Tom Griswold]

Three Christmas trees.

[Christy Lee]

Unbelievable. How many?

[Tom Griswold]

One to go.

[Josh Arnold]

What, you're gonna put up four Christmas trees?

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, no. I got. I've got three. Two are up. And Ace. You saw that? You saw that? I got. The little one was done.

[Chick McGee]

That's the little one?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

That was only.

[Tom Griswold]

It's like a four footer. I mean, it's.

[Josh Arnold]

Is it real?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

Are they all real?

[Christy Lee]

Have you gone out and actually chopped it down in the woods or.

[Tom Griswold]

I have been. I did not do that for this.

[Christy Lee]

Sawed it down.

[Tom Griswold]

I went to the place I go every year.

[Christy Lee]

I did that one year. It was one of my best Christmases ever. Sawed it down. That was fun.

[Tom Griswold]

If you're gonna do that, I would not recommend using a hacksaw.

[Christy Lee]

Why not?

[Tom Griswold]

Because those are for metal. I.

[Christy Lee]

Well, you can get a hacksaw for.

[Josh Arnold]

Wood, any sort of chainsaw.

[Tom Griswold]

But if you're gonna do it, I recommend get goggles.

[Christy Lee]

You don't have to get goggles.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes, you do. Because when I did it, I had to climb underneath the tree with a saw. And of course you're sawing wood full of whatever. It's not like sawing cured lumber. And I got down there and started sawing. And all of the bark, all of the crap that is in a tree just start coming down into my face.

[Christy Lee]

Is that right?

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

You lead a very different existence than anyone else.

[Tom Griswold]

If you've done it, it's not as easy as you think.

[Josh Arnold]

So all three of your trees are.

[Tom Griswold]

Real and I've got one fake, two real.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. It's a long story.

[Christy Lee]

Did you get the pre lit?

[Tom Griswold]

You like the pre lit? Is the little baby tree lit? Pre lit tree.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

It's very nice. All Right. That one's not up yet.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, that one's on the way, huh?

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, it's in my. It's in it. Well, no, I took it out of the box. It's in three pieces and it needs. It requires tools and I'm just.

[Josh Arnold]

I was too tired.

[Christy Lee]

How do you put it together? An Allen wrench. Need an Allen. And who the hell is this Allen guy? Why did he come along and he saw the screws?

[Tom Griswold]

I say Phillips and. Phillips and Allen in a cage match. It does sound like versus Flathead. Doesn't Flathead sound like a name of a wrestler?

[Christy Lee]

Flat head, so.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but give him the Scrooge.

[Christy Lee]

Flat head.

[Tom Griswold]

Every year is the same thing. We get the lights out and string them together. And these are bright light, bright white. Then there's the softer white we got.

[Josh Arnold]

Can't do that. Can't mix them.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I know. Trust me. I found out.

[Christy Lee]

You know, the days are gone when you had to find out which bulb was burned out of the Strand, so you don't have to do that anymore.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, that's a good thing. But, yeah. So we're getting there. We're getting close. Just tired from a long weekend. I'm glad to be back to our routine. You know what I'm saying?

[Christy Lee]

You do seem like a creature of habit to me. You don't do very well out of your routine. That's correct.

[Chick McGee]

Knock over a tree in the middle of the night, probably. Oh, boy. You're gonna knock over a tree?

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah. You're not expecting it to be there.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, you mean in the house?

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

You're shambling around there in the middle of the night.

[Chick McGee]

You're walking in the forest.

[Tom Griswold]

I do worry about the dogs. The dogs coming in and going, oh, look, a tree. I think I'll pee here.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh.

[Chick McGee]

Oh. My cat sleeps under the tree. She's taken to doing that.

[Christy Lee]

She doesn't try to tear it down.

[Chick McGee]

Christmas cat. No, she just gets under it, sleeps under it. Oh, she's.

[Tom Griswold]

This could lead to.

[Josh Arnold]

No, we're not doing the worst story of the show.

[Tom Griswold]

It's time to move on to sports.

[Christy Lee]

You know, when I was.

[Chick McGee]

Tell us, Uncle Chick.

[Christy Lee]

Actually, this did not happen to me. It happened to my dad, and he shared this story with me. They got him when he was, like, I don't know, four or five years old.

[Tom Griswold]

Christmas family.

[Christy Lee]

His parents. Yes. Thanks, Tom. His parents got him a kitten for Christmas.

[Chick McGee]

Very sweet.

[Christy Lee]

And they put it under the tree and evidently the. The kitten got out of the box that it was in. It was loosely tied, of course, because it was a living thing.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

For a while. And then it climbed up into the tree and got tangled in the lights and. Yeah, the tea. The. The. The cat hung itself in the tree there.

[Tom Griswold]

You mean. You mean hanged?

[Christy Lee]

Hanged. I'm sorry. Yes. Pictures are hung.

[Chick McGee]

That's a hell of a Christian.

[Christy Lee]

Are hanged. You're right. Right there.

[Tom Griswold]

That's the example they have in the.

[Chick McGee]

Books for the kids. Yes, that's exactly so awful.

[Josh Arnold]

It is awful.

[Tom Griswold]

Thanks, Christy. Well, let's move.

[Christy Lee]

I wouldn't.

[Tom Griswold]

I. I brought up cat.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, way to go.

[Josh Arnold]

Got the cat. I don't have a cat.

[Christy Lee]

So you're gonna. You're gonna trust Gravy to just sleep under there?

[Tom Griswold]

Huh?

[Christy Lee]

She's not gonna be curious and get up there in the lights.

[Chick McGee]

She got curious when it first was put up, but, you know, she gets that out of her system now she sleeps under it.

[Christy Lee]

Is that right? You think you've got a. You got a. Got her figured out right now.

[Chick McGee]

My living on fire.

[Tom Griswold]

Real career.

[Chick McGee]

No, no, I don't go. I always grew up with real fake trees and. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Did you have the silver aluminum with the color wheel?

[Chick McGee]

No, we didn't. No.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, man, those were awesome.

[Chick McGee]

My grandparents would get a real treat.

[Tom Griswold]

So that was the color wheel would kind of smoke starting the fire with candles. That color wheel with the. I remember that it would appear that one of the colors. The. The gel appeared to be melting. Those days are gone. They've got much safer.

[Josh Arnold]

You can act well, but you can still get the aluminum trees like that.

[Chick McGee]

You know what I got. My grandma always had a. This tiny, like one foot tall ceramic, like really pretty Christmas tree with all the different colors. And I bought one for myself that.

[Josh Arnold]

Has like the little. Little pegs, like the light bright pegs that go in.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, yeah, it's in my room.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, it's in your room?

[Chick McGee]

I fall asleep to it. Yes, that's right. Is that right in the mid. In the early morning pee. I turned it off. A.

[Tom Griswold]

You mean you urinate on the thing to.

[Christy Lee]

You piss over it?

[Chick McGee]

I have to buy a new one each time.

[Christy Lee]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm sorry. Could we.

[Christy Lee]

Hey, at your house. Whatever you want to do.

[Tom Griswold]

Maybe. Maybe back. Maybe back to sports.

[Christy Lee]

All right. Stupid world record. A Massachusetts man, it says here, has broken the Guinness World record for the most consecutive jumps on a pogo stick. Mr. James Rummy. Oh, I don't know.

[Chick McGee]

Rummy is a nickname.

[Christy Lee]

Beat the previous record of 88,047 jumps with a total of 115,170.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, my goodness.

[Tom Griswold]

Can you imagine this guy's ball sack?

[Josh Arnold]

Wouldn't you have a headache?

[Christy Lee]

James said that following the attempt, it took a week to be able to walk. He lost feeling in his fingertips for a couple of weeks. You shouldn't. You shouldn't do. You shouldn't do that. No world record.

[Chick McGee]

Your body's not meant to be doing that. No human jackhammer.

[Christy Lee]

He would like to take back the record for the longest distance pogo stick jumping. He originally broke July 26, 2012 at 23.22 miles.

[Chick McGee]

Gee.

[Christy Lee]

But a broken by a guy named Jax. Jack Sexty. S E X T y. Jack Sexty. He. 26.2 miles. He pogoed a marathon.

[Tom Griswold]

Tom, do you get pee breaks when you do this? Or do you have to.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, boy.

[Tom Griswold]

Do you have to let it roll?

[Christy Lee]

Continue to want to ask questions that no one knows the answer to asking.

[Tom Griswold]

It's a fair question.

[Chick McGee]

You are jostling the bowels.

[Christy Lee]

You sure? Urine. Yeah. How about a dosage there on the pogo stick?

[Tom Griswold]

You know this guy does for a living?

[Josh Arnold]

No.

[Christy Lee]

He works in the paint store. He shakes cans up, stuff like that.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, he's a bouncer.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, it was better than I. I thought it would be.

[Christy Lee]

That's all right. Yeah, that was okay.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, think of this guy's poor ball sack. Up, down, up down, up, down. Looks like. Looks like an aging bungee jump maybe.

[Christy Lee]

He has everything all up, tucked up.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

You know, I was a professional pogo sticker for a while. Yeah. As its ups and downs, you've joined the dark side.

[Tom Griswold]

That sports.

[Christy Lee]

Shouldn't it be.

[Tom Griswold]

Josh hasn't heard our new intro.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, what is it?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, our outro. I'm sorry.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, you missed the whole thing.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah, Here it is.

[Christy Lee]

Chip Muggy.

[Chick McGee]

This is what you party for. Another new version.

[Christy Lee]

It's the whole crew, man.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, yeah. It sounded like a duo, didn't it?

[Christy Lee]

Did you hear they got locked in Dean's studio?

[Chick McGee]

Is that right?

[Tom Griswold]

So. So Hart was here. One of my little girls with.

[Christy Lee]

And her cousin with.

[Tom Griswold]

With my niece's daughter. They're the same age. So they went into Dean's studio to record that and the. The door handle broke and they. They were quite literally trapped in that.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, With Lucy. During the show.

[Tom Griswold]

During the show, yes.

[Josh Arnold]

Absolutely. Locked a good 20 minutes or so to get him out.

[Chick McGee]

Huh?

[Tom Griswold]

And the only reason they got out because Eddie tried to. Our engineer tried to take the door handle off, but that didn't allow him to get in. But Dean had a screwdriver inside and was able to undo it. So had there been a fire or something, we would have had to get a sledgehammer and break the glass.

[Chick McGee]

So all your daughters were just Matt lowered into that office over there.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, is that what they call that? Matt's a verb now?

[Chick McGee]

Okay, let me have that button.

[Tom Griswold]

You know, kind of scary.

[Josh Arnold]

Sure. It was kind of recorded.

[Tom Griswold]

That great outro we even have.

[Chick McGee]

Not as good.

[Tom Griswold]

No, we haven't. Well, we have.

[Christy Lee]

I don't think so.

[Tom Griswold]

We have another one where Finn joins them. So it's like the Lenin sisters.

[Chick McGee]

Lovely. The Lenin.

[Josh Arnold]

The Lenin sisters, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

They reemerge every Christmas.

[Chick McGee]

You could have gone with Pointer.

[Tom Griswold]

If you go with one of the. One of those Christmas song channels at.

[Christy Lee]

The reference you make. The Lenin sister.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, I just.

[Josh Arnold]

I watched White Christmas last night. Speaking of old movies.

[Chick McGee]

Boy, does it hold up.

[Josh Arnold]

I love White Christmas. You don't like White Christmas?

[Chick McGee]

A little boring.

[Josh Arnold]

I thought you have all been.

[Christy Lee]

I do.

[Josh Arnold]

I love it.

[Christy Lee]

You know, I. I've said this, but I'm on record saying there's nobody hotter in the history of Hollywood than Rosemary Clooney.

[Josh Arnold]

She's beautiful.

[Chick McGee]

Just a knockout.

[Christy Lee]

Unbelievable.

[Josh Arnold]

Early Clooney, Ellen. Her waist is like 12 inches around. Unbelievable.

[Chick McGee]

Doesn't White Christmas come from Holiday Inn? The movie Holiday. The song does. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Then they read, then they made a movie.

[Josh Arnold]

Then they made a movie out of called White Christmas.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, it is good too.

[Christy Lee]

In color, I believe, right?

[Josh Arnold]

It is in color. Beautiful costuming, great dressing.

[Chick McGee]

What's the better movie? Oh, White Christmas.

[Christy Lee]

Well, Holiday Inn is a murder Christmas vacation.

[Chick McGee]

Bad set.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, thank you very much for the sports cast, Chick McGee.

[Christy Lee]

Well, you're welcome, Tom.

[Tom Griswold]

I did not mention anything else about sports, which I could have, but I did not. I chose not to.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, Washington got 48 to 10. Or 45 to 10. I forget now.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm sorry.

[Christy Lee]

I'm sorry.

[Chick McGee]

He said, smiling.

[Tom Griswold]

Very.

[Christy Lee]

Washington got beat by the Cowboys. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, that was. I.

[Christy Lee]

That. That wasn't it.

[Chick McGee]

No.

[Christy Lee]

Ohio State, Michigan, what was it?

[Tom Griswold]

It was the chewing of the week. It was. Oh, very, very one and four.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Rough weeks.

[Christy Lee]

Went from three and one to one, anything.

[Tom Griswold]

And then Christie. Christie prodded me.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, way to go, Christy.

[Tom Griswold]

And first. First, Christie brings up the dead cat.

[Ace Cosby]

Story on the Bob and Tom Show. Next, Tom was right. Plus Santa and some elf names for you.

[Chick McGee]

Come on.

[Ace Cosby]

Back on a Thursday morning. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Christy Lee]

Bob and Tom.

[Ace Cosby]

Happy Thanksgiving from us here at the Bob and Tom Show. This is Christopher in the Bob and Tom studios. And this segment doesn't happen very often. But Tom was right. Plus Santa and some elf names.

[Josh Arnold]

We have to do the you were right dance.

[Tom Griswold]

Why?

[Josh Arnold]

Ace and I had lunch yesterday at your restaurant that you said had the best pizza in the city. Pretty damn good.

[Chick McGee]

And we teased Christy for eating like a bird. She ate half a pizza.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh my God. It was so good.

[Chick McGee]

Nice.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

Whatever. Chunkles. Go ahead.

[Tom Griswold]

But the better part of the argument was Ace. Ace said that that area doesn't exist.

[Josh Arnold]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

Because there's. There are no stores there.

[Josh Arnold]

I was with him. I was totally. You guys are going there.

[Christy Lee]

That was the. It's. It's gone from there's nothing there to. He. He really. He'll say anything. He can not to be wrong.

[Tom Griswold]

He said there was. There was nothing there.

[Chick McGee]

There's a freaking hotel there.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, but there's.

[Chick McGee]

There's no restaurant.

[Christy Lee]

See? Here we go.

[Josh Arnold]

I didn't even know there was a hotel. Honestly. I thought there was nothing there but office buildings.

[Tom Griswold]

There is something there.

[Chick McGee]

But it was good stuff.

[Tom Griswold]

Huh? Isn't that great pizza?

[Josh Arnold]

It was really good.

[Chick McGee]

Very good.

[Tom Griswold]

Very, very nice. Nothing like great pizza Christmas time. I say.

[Chick McGee]

Huh?

[Tom Griswold]

Do you ever do a. We made our own pizzas last weekend.

[Josh Arnold]

Did you?

[Tom Griswold]

Which is really fun because instead of spending, I don't know, 15 bucks for a nice to go pizza you spend $60 buying ingredients.

[Josh Arnold]

What ingredients do the girls put on their pizzas?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, that. It gets complicated. Yeah. You gotta buy the right kind of cheese.

[Christy Lee]

Is it gummy bears?

[Tom Griswold]

No. That was last night.

[Christy Lee]

We had a fairy dropping.

[Josh Arnold]

Did you do cookie party?

[Tom Griswold]

We had a gingerbread house building party. My house. Santa came over. It was amazing. I don't know how he had the time. Santa came over your house with Mrs. Claus.

[Josh Arnold]

My God.

[Chick McGee]

Film. Isn't it?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

To only have grown up a Griswold.

[Tom Griswold]

Gross. Great. Oh yeah. The kids had a wonderful time.

[Chick McGee]

No doubt.

[Christy Lee]

You know, there are probably some things you might want to edit out of your stories. That might have been one of them.

[Tom Griswold]

I do have a. Interesting.

[Christy Lee]

Scott only knows what he paid Santa.

[Chick McGee]

Claus to come over there this time of year. Man.

[Tom Griswold]

Good.

[Josh Arnold]

It's goodwill.

[Greg Warren]

No.

[Chick McGee]

Not this week.

[Tom Griswold]

There may have been a gentleman named Benjamin involved. I don't know.

[Christy Lee]

How you doing? Santa Claus?

[Tom Griswold]

But a tip for those building a house.

[Josh Arnold]

A gingerbread house. I know.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm in a regular house.

[Christy Lee]

We continue to break new barriers and narrow casting. Now how about you people building a house.

[Chick McGee]

Go.

[Tom Griswold]

I think everybody at some point in your life. Everybody wants to build a house.

[Christy Lee]

Wants to?

[Greg Warren]

Sure.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Well, maybe you should work harder. Maybe do better in life. Got a brand new house.

[Christy Lee]

You are just making friends.

[Chick McGee]

The everyman.

[Christy Lee]

Good God.

[Tom Griswold]

Accessible. I'll talk to you. Josh.

[Chick McGee]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes. Do you have a basement at your place?

[Chick McGee]

I do.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Now I have an entire entirely unfinished basement. I mean, it is entirely unfinished. There's no furniture down there. Any. The kids, after they built their gingerbread houses, ran around the unfinished basement all night.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, it's great.

[Tom Griswold]

There's nothing down there.

[Josh Arnold]

That's the best you can get them? What did you do in your basement when you were a kid?

[Chick McGee]

We roller skates.

[Josh Arnold]

Roller skates. You could roller skates cascade in the.

[Tom Griswold]

Basement and I. I spent some time yesterday one online. The basement has these pillars in it.

[Josh Arnold]

Sure. You steal like you're gonna put mats around.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. So I holds the floor up. Yeah. You can buy these mats that go around the pillars. I don't want one of the kids in a game of hide and seek clunking their head.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, but that's how they learn. Didn't you put the piano down there for them to play?

[Tom Griswold]

I did. That's. That's in my little officer. That's completely. Also unfinished. The only thing. That's the only thing in there that it's actually plugged in. Oh. A little electric piano. Thank you, Pat. God.

[Chick McGee]

You're welcome.

[Christy Lee]

I applaud your efforts trying to protect them. It won't work, but. Yeah, keep. Keep trying.

[Tom Griswold]

So far, the only kids who've been injured are my friend's kids. There was the one child that needed stitches after the knife incident.

[Chick McGee]

Knife incident.

[Tom Griswold]

And then there was the. Then there was the crashing of the electric motorcycle into a garbage can incident.

[Christy Lee]

Whenever he talks about a knife and anyone getting cut, it's the fingers almost cut entirely off. It's always 30 stitches or more. It's never just a snip. Here we go.

[Tom Griswold]

Just seven.

[Josh Arnold]

Seven stitches. Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

It's a brand new knife.

[Christy Lee]

I don't believe that either.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, okay. I can.

[Chick McGee]

Being a parent has to be hard for many reasons, but one has to be because you want your kids to learn certain things, which means they have to hurt themselves.

[Josh Arnold]

Right.

[Chick McGee]

But you don't want your kids to hurt themselves. At what point?

[Tom Griswold]

They'd gone to this special camp where you learn how to do all kinds of skills. And one of them was knife throwing. No, no, but. And there were certain rules, and they were. I said, okay, we're gonna. After. After dinner, we're gonna Go do a little carving.

[Christy Lee]

So one of your daughters.

[Tom Griswold]

Status? I need 30 seconds. I gotta clear the dishes. 20 seconds later, they come running in with two bloody hands. See, they couldn't wait. So they did learn something.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, they did. They did.

[Tom Griswold]

And then there's that phone call to your friend. Hey, listen, I'm on my way to the emergency room with your daughter. Yeah, but no, no, all cuts last night. It was a fun night.

[Josh Arnold]

Good.

[Tom Griswold]

We have a great show today. A special, a special surprise guest. Very, very big surprise.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, wow.

[Tom Griswold]

And also we have our house bandits, Duke Tomato and the Power Trio. They'll be joining us in a matter of moments from the other room. But Mr. Godwin, I think we could start off with a song. I was thinking about something. I got a nice note here about how those watching on the various places you can watch this show, YouTube etc, they enjoy the fact that you're no longer dying your hair.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, wow, you're there years ago.

[Tom Griswold]

You, you've got that white haired look. You're being. You've been compared to the guy who played Jay Peterman. Oh, yes, Seinfeld, sure, that guy. He's the dog show guy now.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Has that distinguished bouffant of white hair. But you used to dye your hair.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, I dyed a lot of stuff.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. And then did you ever dye the, the pubic region? I mean, your hair is like snow white, so I assume it's absolutely.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, I got a couple down there. I had some in the front forearms and the chest. I did the chest a couple times and.

[Josh Arnold]

Really?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah, yeah. You dyed your chest.

[Chick McGee]

Vanity knows no bounds, right? Yeah, yeah, that's all right.

[Tom Griswold]

And. But you have a tribute to hair.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I died everywhere, man. Colored all my hair, man. Just for men down there, man. I used to die everywhere, man. Head hair, chest hair, arm hair, leg hair, ear hair, nose hair, lip hair, chin hair, neck hair, back hair, belly hair, brow hair. The hair above my ass crack. I swear to hair shin hair, cheek hair, ball hair. I dyed everywhere. Oh, I died everywhere, man. And I didn't have hair to spare, man. It was black as coal down there, man. When I was done, pews had three gray hairs, man. Now I'm as white as Santa. Oh, well, I died everywhere, man.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you very much. Thank you very much. I was thinking about that. I heard some Johnny Cash doing some Christmas music coming in this morning.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, very nice.

[Tom Griswold]

There's this reindeer controversy that Christy brought up.

[Christy Lee]

Women, nothing but women. Reindeer pulling the sleigh.

[Tom Griswold]

You want to call them lady reindeers. Right. They're not humans.

[Chick McGee]

Broads.

[Christy Lee]

Female.

[Josh Arnold]

They're not broads.

[Tom Griswold]

The lady reindeer shirts. So what's the deal here? That Rudolph's the only male reindeer?

[Josh Arnold]

Well, I guess if you want to call it that.

[Tom Griswold]

Why is that now?

[Josh Arnold]

Because the male reindeer lose their antlers in the winter and the females retain them.

[Tom Griswold]

So the advantage would be at least the female reindeers will stop and ask for directions.

[Josh Arnold]

True.

[Tom Griswold]

Whereas the male reindeer just go, I know where it is. We're going to find it.

[Christy Lee]

When do the female reindeer stop their menes.

[Chick McGee]

When?

[Josh Arnold]

When?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, when?

[Josh Arnold]

When they're dead. I don't know.

[Christy Lee]

They have mensies all their lives.

[Josh Arnold]

I. I would think.

[Christy Lee]

You think they all synced up. I bet they did.

[Chick McGee]

They must. I mean, they'd have to.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. That one terrible year where it landed on Christmas Eve. Almost quit.

[Christy Lee]

You can't keep flushing your tampons in the restroom.

[Chick McGee]

That's why Rudolph's read his nose.

[Tom Griswold]

Wow. You were so happy with the joke.

[Josh Arnold]

You sped it up and turned the.

[Tom Griswold]

Words out of order.

[Chick McGee]

You know, this is what happens when we start a show in the early morning.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, I know.

[Chick McGee]

We really. 10am is really.

[Christy Lee]

I've been a longtime champion a. Later, later.

[Chick McGee]

That joke would have been fine if.

[Tom Griswold]

They read the transcripts in court. It's in the afternoon. You go, hey, look, Your honor.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, what do you want from me.

[Tom Griswold]

Early in the morning? Give me a break. I don't see you put. I don't see you putting your robe on at 4:00am and writing this stuff. All right, now we have Mr. Chick McGee over there. By the way, surprise guest coming up this morning.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, really?

[Tom Griswold]

We're going to have some Christmas music on a du. And the boys, we'll also meet comedian Al Jackson.

[Josh Arnold]

But right now, did you hire Santa to visit us, too?

[Tom Griswold]

Santa's very busy today.

[Josh Arnold]

I know.

[Tom Griswold]

Maybe, but he wasn't last night.

[Christy Lee]

No. He could come to your house. You have no idea how you sound, do you? Or maybe you do. I just don't care. And you don't care how many people are mad at you.

[Tom Griswold]

It was the fourth time I've seen Santa.

[Josh Arnold]

Fourth time.

[Chick McGee]

Way to ring the magic out of yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Hey, let's recreate this.

[Chick McGee]

Bad. Do we have to see Santa tonight? That's what. Yeah, that's what you want your kids to say.

[Tom Griswold]

They were very enthusiastic.

[Josh Arnold]

Now we have a happy winter solstice day. Oh, it's the shortest, shortest day of the year.

[Christy Lee]

Day of the year.

[Josh Arnold]

Y.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

But it's beginning of winter.

[Christy Lee]

It's not really, though, right? It's refers to something else, I think. I think. I don't know.

[Josh Arnold]

It's the beginning of winter in the Northern hemisphere and of summer in the Southern hemisphere.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, Christie was asking me if I knew what my elf name.

[Josh Arnold]

Do you know what your elf name is?

[Tom Griswold]

I do not. How does. Is there a formula for.

[Josh Arnold]

There's a formula just like everything else. This is very old, but it's kind of cute. All right, so, Tom, you use the first letter of your first name.

[Tom Griswold]

Check.

[Josh Arnold]

So that would be T. Okay, so your first name would be Sugar Plum. And the month you were born, so your last name would be Sugar Plum McGingles.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, that's cute. Very cute. Sugar Plum McJingles.

[Christy Lee]

Lovely.

[Chick McGee]

Very good.

[Tom Griswold]

That sounds like that's like a name of someone who's not a felon.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

You're gonna Trust Sugar Plum McJingles?

[Christy Lee]

Can I be like Peppermint Hang down.

[Josh Arnold]

Let's find out.

[Christy Lee]

Candy cane.

[Josh Arnold]

Yours first starts. It starts with Bubbles.

[Christy Lee]

Bubbles.

[Josh Arnold]

Bubbles. You're in November, Right?

[Chick McGee]

Bubbles.

[Christy Lee]

Dong. No, that wouldn't work.

[Josh Arnold]

Yours is Bubbles. Monkey Buns.

[Christy Lee]

Bubbles. Monkey Buns.

[Chick McGee]

Hey, Bubbles. Monkey Buns.

[Tom Griswold]

How did monkey buns get into Christmas time? I don't know.

[Christy Lee]

Monkey buns doesn't sound like a name for an elf.

[Chick McGee]

We used to make monkey bread. Something called monkey bread in homec. So maybe. Maybe it refers to that fine dessert.

[Christy Lee]

So Tom's was Sugar Plum.

[Josh Arnold]

Sugar Plum mcgingles.

[Christy Lee]

And mine's Monkey Buns.

[Josh Arnold]

Yours is Bubbles.

[Tom Griswold]

Monkey Buns sound very Christmy.

[Josh Arnold]

There's yours.

[Chick McGee]

What do you mean? It's a red ass.

[Josh Arnold]

When's your. When. When are you born?

[Chick McGee]

May.

[Josh Arnold]

May. Okay, so you are. Let's see. Pudding, Pudding. Peppermint. Pudding.

[Chick McGee]

Peppermint. That's delicious.

[Christy Lee]

See, that sounds. Why do I get stuck with monkey bar?

[Josh Arnold]

Let's see what pat would be. Pat. You are Jingle. And you're a December, right?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

You're Jingle. Pointy toes.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, how about that again?

[Tom Griswold]

Very crispy.

[Josh Arnold]

Ace.

[Tom Griswold]

Have you looked okay?

[Josh Arnold]

Ace is. When's your. Oh, September. Perky, Perky pickle pants for an elf.

[Chick McGee]

Look at old perky pickle pants.

[Christy Lee]

Pickle pants. And what are you?

[Chick McGee]

Christy.

[Christy Lee]

Kind of go together.

[Josh Arnold]

Let's see. I didn't look mine up. Mine is cookie. Sugar plum.

[Chick McGee]

Of course it is.

[Tom Griswold]

See, that's. They're all good. Except chicks is weird.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, chicks is weird.

[Christy Lee]

Who had jingles?

[Chick McGee]

I was jingles.

[Christy Lee]

You were jingles?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Your jingles. Pantyhose jingles.

[Christy Lee]

Mr. Jingles.

[Tom Griswold]

What do you what do you.

[Christy Lee]

That mouse lived a long time.

[Josh Arnold]

He was jingle. Pointy toes.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, pointy toes. Pointy toes.

[Chick McGee]

We're going to get you out of here, magic man. Don't you worry.

[Christy Lee]

Like all the electricity is going off of my hand.

[Chick McGee]

Can you do something about this bladder infection on him?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Come here.

[Tom Griswold]

And then aces touch your nose. Perky pickle pants.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes, yes. Perky pickle pants.

[Christy Lee]

And mine's Bubbles. Bubbles. Monkey buns.

[Josh Arnold]

Monkey buns?

[Christy Lee]

That's not an elf name. I demand to be re. Examined.

[Tom Griswold]

It's not very Christmassy, but it's sweet.

[Chick McGee]

It's the monkey buns you have a problem with?

[Christy Lee]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

How about his youngest daughter's birth month instead?

[Josh Arnold]

What? What is your younger daughter? Oh, chicks. What's Ellie's birth month?

[Christy Lee]

July.

[Josh Arnold]

July. Oh, then you would be Bubble Sugar blum.

[Chick McGee]

Oh.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

What do we got over there? Christy?

[Josh Arnold]

Holiday stories for you. A new survey reveals which pickup lines are most likely to work at your Christmas party.

[Christy Lee]

How about it?

[Chick McGee]

All right.

[Josh Arnold]

How about it?

[Tom Griswold]

Now, is this like any Christmas party?

[Josh Arnold]

You want to make out or what?

[Tom Griswold]

The office Christmas party.

[Chick McGee]

This has got to be a different non office Christmas party.

[Josh Arnold]

Let's just say a Christmas party. It doesn't say an office Christmas party, Tom.

[Chick McGee]

Because those pickup lines would be different, I think.

[Christy Lee]

Did I tell. I've told you my Christmas party story. We went to a Christmas. First of all, it was at the owner's house, which was kind of odd. It wasn't offside or anything. And we're. We're. We had a very nice dinner. And then all of a sudden the lights are turned down from somewhere and we're all sitting in the living room and this performer comes out and sings like two or three Christmas songs. And it was pretty good, but it was a lady, actually a gentleman dressed like a lady and just sang the hell out of Some Christmas.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, no kidding.

[Christy Lee]

It was. It was interesting.

[Chick McGee]

That is interesting.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, but it was in someone's home.

[Tom Griswold]

This was your very first radio station.

[Christy Lee]

No, no, no. This was a long time ago.

[Tom Griswold]

Really?

[Christy Lee]

Yep. Very interesting, huh?

[Tom Griswold]

Very unusual. It's certainly years ago.

[Christy Lee]

Certainly.

[Tom Griswold]

Do you remember what songs were performed?

[Christy Lee]

I don't. I'm gonna say Sleigh Bells and Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, was it the serious ones? Was it, hmm, like Silent Night?

[Chick McGee]

Do you think that. Was this person transitioning?

[Josh Arnold]

Was it a drag queen Christmas? Is that what we're doing?

[Chick McGee]

So were there songs like It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like a vagina.

[Tom Griswold]

Thank you, Josh.

[Christy Lee]

I'm Beginning to look a lot like Stephanie. All right.

[Tom Griswold]

Why?

[Christy Lee]

That was one step too far.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Chick McGee]

Jingle bells. Tuck my ball.

[Christy Lee]

What do you do with your balls?

[Tom Griswold]

Christine.

[Josh Arnold]

According to the poll conducted by best casinosites.net the standout pickup line was. Aside from being sexy. What do you do for a living?

[Chick McGee]

No. There's no way that works.

[Tom Griswold]

That works.

[Josh Arnold]

That's number 18.6%.

[Chick McGee]

Well.

[Tom Griswold]

Really?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

What does the guy look like who's saying it?

[Christy Lee]

Where does. Where does. Hey. Do this or you're going to get fired. Where does that come in?

[Josh Arnold]

I don't think these are office pickup lines. I think these are just Christmas party in general. The second most successful pickup line. Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only 10. I see that one.

[Chick McGee]

Man.

[Josh Arnold]

That's been around forever.

[Christy Lee]

Z.

[Tom Griswold]

That sounds like a country song.

[Josh Arnold]

15.1% success rate according to the site.

[Tom Griswold]

Really?

[Christy Lee]

How much?

[Tom Griswold]

15.

[Josh Arnold]

15.1.

[Chick McGee]

Again. Doesn't it? The person saying it. It plays a big role in 85%.

[Christy Lee]

It fails.

[Josh Arnold]

Right.

[Christy Lee]

All right.

[Josh Arnold]

A followed by. Is your name Google? Because you have everything. I've been searching for these things.

[Chick McGee]

No. These are. These are jokey. Ryan Gosling uses these lines. He has a 98 success rate. Paul Giamatti says these things.

[Tom Griswold]

It's 12% and he ends up in jail.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Yeah. It's not. It's not.

[Tom Griswold]

Didn't I see you on pornhub? You know. Something like that. That's gonna work. That's gonna work. For Ryan Gosling.

[Josh Arnold]

The least successful of the buck lunch was. Do you have a map? I keep getting lost in your eyes.

[Christy Lee]

What about the classic f effort fight? Is that in there? No.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay.

[Christy Lee]

Never.

[Chick McGee]

Never mind.

[Tom Griswold]

Maybe walk up to three women and say Ho. Ho.

[Chick McGee]

Ho. That's right.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm talking to you ladies.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh yeah. That's a good one.

[Christy Lee]

You always talk to the ladies.

[Ace Cosby]

Glad you're with us on a Thursday morning. Come on back. Greg Warren is coming up next. This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Christy Lee]

Well, my whole family would like to eat. Yeah. Yams and ham and Ms.

[Chick McGee]

Sometimes my Grammys should make a little.

[Christy Lee]

Lamb Grammy's lamb and yam and ham.

[Tom Griswold]

And Ms. Grammy's lemon Yummy Yam and.

[Christy Lee]

Lemon Ham, ham and lemon Yam and.

[Tom Griswold]

M's Grammy's lemon yam Yam and lemon.

[Christy Lee]

Ham, ham and lemon yam and Mickey Wicky.

[Chick McGee]

Wicked.

[Tom Griswold]

Well my Uncle Danny likes to make.

[Christy Lee]

Clams dance Clams and Grammy's lamb and yam and ham and M M's sing.

[Chick McGee]

Along if you know it.

[Christy Lee]

How about some Spam.

[Tom Griswold]

They love it in Hawaii.

[Christy Lee]

Sometimes he'll throw in a dab of jam, a dab of jam and Danny's clams and Grammy's lamb and yam and.

[Tom Griswold]

Ham and m a dab and jam.

[Christy Lee]

And clam yam lamb and ham, ham and jam and yam and lemon lims.

[Tom Griswold]

Lamb and yum and ham, ham and.

[Christy Lee]

Grammy lamb, yam and Grammy lamb and Mickey Wicky.

[Ace Cosby]

More of the Bob and Tom show now on this Thursday Thanksgiving morning. This is Christopher speaking from the Bob and Tom studios. This segment features our good friend comedian.

[Tom Griswold]

Greg Warren, fresh off the ship on the Bert Chrysler comedy tour with several thousand.

[Christy Lee]

What was it? The Fully Loaded Cruise.

[Tom Griswold]

Fully loaded, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, that's right.

[Tom Griswold]

Boy. One of the weird things about being on a cruise ship, of course, is you do a show, you're walking around the next day and your audience is right there.

[Chick McGee]

A lot of pictures, man. A lot of selfies.

[Christy Lee]

No kidding.

[Chick McGee]

Cool.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

I mean, big time comedy fans.

[Tom Griswold]

These, these good. I'm glad it went well.

[Christy Lee]

You know, I was giving you advice about, you know, talking, talking to girls.

[Chick McGee]

Some real nice tips you had.

[Christy Lee]

Doing the peace sign and wiggling your fingers. You know, stuff like that. They, they love that.

[Jess Hooker]

Has that ever worked for you?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah.

[Jess Hooker]

Is that right?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. And also if they, if they ask you for an autograph, you go, hey, you make it make. Make the motion like you're reaching for your pen in your pocket. Ah, my pen's back in my cabin.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, that sounds like you want to.

[Christy Lee]

Come back to the cabin.

[Chick McGee]

That's smooth.

[Christy Lee]

I'll sign whatever you like.

[Chick McGee]

That sounds. That's got a little demonet.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Oh, yeah, it's smooth.

[Chick McGee]

I really like. That is better than what I normally. A woman. May I please have your autograph? I go, you mean sex? That's not as smooth.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, he gets excited.

[Tom Griswold]

We were talking about movies we've seen the most.

[Christy Lee]

Oh.

[Tom Griswold]

And interestingly enough, we kind of went around the horn. The movie you've watched the most in your life and phrase Cosby. That movie is Fast Times. Fast times at Ridgemont High. Asaw it in the theater. Double digits. And I know that's. That's your best impression.

[Chick McGee]

I probably not. Well, I know what I look like. Hey, Rhett, show them how you stand up in the water. I want you to want me.

[Tom Griswold]

That actor's name is what?

[Chick McGee]

That is Robert Romanis. I met him one time at a Starbucks in la. Biggest moment of my life.

[Tom Griswold]

Awesome.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, couldn't have been.

[Tom Griswold]

Did you, did you do his impression?

[Chick McGee]

Of him do it. But I told him that I kind of got started in comedy in college because I would just go around doing him and he goes, and I said, I'm a comedian. He goes, so you're a comedian, huh? Goes, I'm gonna have to come check you out someday. Oh, that's so nice. He's so nice, man. So I, I, you see celebrities out there all the time and I never approach you just don't approach him. That's the role with him.

[Tom Griswold]

I, I had to.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. I was with my friend Claude and he's like, dude, that's Damone over there.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm like.

[Chick McGee]

He goes, you gotta go say something. You gotta say something, man.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, Claude, Claude Balls.

[Chick McGee]

Claude Stewart. Oh, Claude Balls.

[Christy Lee]

I'm sorry.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, now that reminds me, we do have a news story. Breaking news out of Hollywood. You got that over there, Jess?

[Jess Hooker]

I think so.

[Christy Lee]

They have the strike. They've reached an agreement with the strikes.

[Chick McGee]

They have.

[Jess Hooker]

The Hollywood actors strike has come to an end. The actors union reached a tentative agreement with studios on Wednesday.

[Chick McGee]

Whiny ass actors finally realized they had it good, huh?

[Jess Hooker]

Ending the four month long strike that ground the film television industries to a halt.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, Greg's holding up his SAG after card. Who'd you take that from? Did you find that? I'm in the union. Oh, are you? Yeah. So, so this is settled. It's settled, you guys. You'll see me on an episode of TJ Hooker or the Rock, whatever they're filming now, I would imagine I'm gonna get a call pretty soon.

[Tom Griswold]

There is. I mean, I'm glad for our friends that are actors. Yes. At the same time, I really hadn't caught up with everything that. That was one of the good things about this. Kind of gave you breather to not have to watch any new stuff because there's so much great stuff that we've.

[Christy Lee]

Missed and our friends who are actors, specifically my friends, we decided 30 days after the settlement we'd get paid back. So I'm expecting that check.

[Chick McGee]

Okay. All right.

[Christy Lee]

I know it's only 50 bucks, but it means something to me.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm going to take down my GoFundMe page for Ryan Gosling. Help him out.

[Christy Lee]

Why doesn't anyone call him Goose? Goose?

[Chick McGee]

Maybe they do.

[Christy Lee]

Maybe they do.

[Chick McGee]

You know what? He would let you. I know you guys would be friends.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah, Me goose, James Franco. Oh, yeah, we'd hang out. That'd be a great.

[Tom Griswold]

So the strike is over. So. Well, good, good, good news.

[Chick McGee]

Glad to hear it.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, I imagine the scripts are already ready. They'll be up and running real soon, I would assume.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, the writers strike got settled a couple of months ago, I think. Yep.

[Tom Griswold]

Will Smith can keep being canceled now that he's back at work.

[Christy Lee]

Where are we on him as a country?

[Chick McGee]

He's an A hole, I think.

[Jess Hooker]

Just go away.

[Chick McGee]

Yep. Yeah, that's where we are.

[Jess Hooker]

That would be his best bet.

[Christy Lee]

Okay, here we go. Is everyone comfortable? Everyone ready? One more world record. Are you ready? Especially Josh.

[Chick McGee]

Yes. Why wouldn't I be, stupid?

[Tom Griswold]

World record.

[Christy Lee]

A Colombian DJ has been confirmed as the world's shortest club dj.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

DJ Jason Enrique Delgado Castro earned the Guinness World Record title after his height was confirmed at 3ft, 4 inches. His style, charm and professionalism entertain audiences for hours at private parties and nightclubs.

[Tom Griswold]

It's hard to make a request, though, because you walk up to the DJ booth, you can't see him around here. Where are you? Oh, Jesus. He's under the desk.

[Chick McGee]

He goes by MC Hake. You get that for me?

[Christy Lee]

Plus, he's always.

[Tom Griswold]

He's really emphasizing the jockey part of disc jockey. I. He's.

[Christy Lee]

He's also always borrowed money.

[Chick McGee]

Why is that?

[Christy Lee]

Because he's. He's a little short, you see, in.

[Tom Griswold]

The type that the DJ is with lowercase letters. That's how short this guy.

[Christy Lee]

He's never considered his height as an impediment to achieving his goals. In fact, he found an opportunity to stand out from the crowd. Well, that's just the exact opposite.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

You know who else is that famous DJ of size? Shaq.

[Chick McGee]

Shaq.

[Christy Lee]

Shaq Foo.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Probably his turds.

[Christy Lee]

The size of this, you know? Ask Jess about Shaquille O'Neal.

[Jess Hooker]

Shaquille O'Neal is my wallpaper on my phone until I meet him Every. Every season I change it. This one says, happy Shacks giving.

[Christy Lee]

Happy.

[Chick McGee]

Shaq's giving. Can I see?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, Right.

[Tom Griswold]

Go.

[Christy Lee]

That's cool.

[Jess Hooker]

Love him.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, he's great.

[Tom Griswold]

That's his shoe out there.

[Ace Cosby]

He was a rapper, too.

[Chick McGee]

I mean, he. He put out an album, didn't he?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Isn't that his shoe?

[Jess Hooker]

Yeah, it is.

[Tom Griswold]

We have one of his shoes. I don't know how that came about, but we have.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, he was here. We took.

[Tom Griswold]

It's about that size.

[Christy Lee]

I say leave your shoe and you can get out of here with your life, Shaq. That's what I told him.

[Chick McGee]

Okay.

[Christy Lee]

I'm just like you. I'm eight feet tall.

[Chick McGee]

I was going to give you the shoe anyway.

[Christy Lee]

I got A horse hung on me.

[Chick McGee]

Can I keep my song? Thanks for the footer.

[Christy Lee]

People are usually surprised first by the DJ's size and second by his great talents as a DJ. They always ask him for photos and videos and they approach him to follow him on social networks. When they found out that he is the shortest club DJ ever, they congratulate him and compliment him.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, well, he really is a spinner. He just. He spins records and he. Get him in the bedroom.

[Chick McGee]

I don't think it works like, unless he's of a particular.

[Tom Griswold]

I see.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Very good. Very, very good.

[Christy Lee]

Very, very good. How about it, Skip? Is that sports? Yep, that's it.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. Thank you very much. Thank you very much. Here we go. This is what you far.

[Christy Lee]

Wherever you go, whatever you do, always be a good sport. Jess.

[Jess Hooker]

In Las Vegas, strip club is honoring Veterans Day by offering free lap dances to current and former military members.

[Chick McGee]

Nice. Great idea.

[Jess Hooker]

Managers at Las Vegas's Crazy Horse 3 announced the bump and grind giveaway on Monday.

[Chick McGee]

I didn't Enjoy Crazy Horse 3. I'd never seen one in two very long.

[Jess Hooker]

Former military and current both. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Hey, you want to. You ever hear that? You ever hear that song? That song the Yankee are Coming.

[Christy Lee]

Well.

[Chick McGee]

Oh.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I just did.

[Chick McGee]

Call me Iwo Jima. It's gonna take four of you to lift this baby.

[Jess Hooker]

The flyer for the promotion features a busty blonde and a skimpy star spangled bikini.

[Chick McGee]

Well, I like busty blondes and skimpy star spangled bikinis.

[Christy Lee]

Yep.

[Jess Hooker]

But are you a veteran?

[Chick McGee]

No, no, my father. My father. I think I'd qualify.

[Jess Hooker]

You think so?

[Christy Lee]

Well, you went to West Point.

[Chick McGee]

I went to West Point for a year and I have an honorable discharge.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, I bet they get a lot of discharges.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, we know a lot of discharges. I was not trying to set you idiots up for that.

[Tom Griswold]

Wanted this to go.

[Chick McGee]

You're a good straight man, Greg. Good job.

[Ace Cosby]

Coming up next hour, elevator tips and hills to die on. But next on the Bob and Tom show, razzle dazzle and an early Thanksgiving. It's next on the Bob and Tom show. Welcome back on this Thursday morning. This is Christopher in the Bob and Tom studios. And this is the best of the Bob and Tom show on a Thanksgiving morning. This segment features razzle dazzle and an early Thanksgiving. Let's get back to the action.

[Christy Lee]

I like that early.

[Tom Griswold]

I like that nine Sunday morning game.

[Christy Lee]

And I like it.

[Tom Griswold]

I'd be very curious to know if those early Sunday games are affecting church attendance sentence.

[Chick McGee]

Absolutely.

[Josh Arnold]

What city you live in. Yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

What time zone? That's really early if you're in California.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah. I bet they're having a bra. No, early pancakes.

[Josh Arnold]

Bloody Mary.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

You know, like Christy does for the coronation or a wedding.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, absolutely.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, well.

[Christy Lee]

Remember her pajama? Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

The early game. The early game. If you would. If you slept in, you would have slept in watching it. Snooze Fest One touchdown. Yikes.

[Christy Lee]

You don't.

[Josh Arnold]

Maybe it was a defensive battle.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, it was. And it was.

[Tom Griswold]

I want to see. I'll watch soccer.

[Christy Lee]

True. True NFL f. I want to see.

[Tom Griswold]

No scoring.

[Christy Lee]

Enjoyed the game.

[Josh Arnold]

Right. No matter what.

[Christy Lee]

Sure. He doesn't.

[Greg Warren]

Here.

[Christy Lee]

Here's my invitation to Bill Belichick. What am I doing, Tom?

[Tom Griswold]

Looking at plays.

[Josh Arnold]

It's all he did.

[Tom Griswold]

All under.

[Christy Lee]

They. Every time they took a shot of him, he's looking at papers on the sideline.

[Chick McGee]

Well, it was confusing. They were all in German.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, that's a thing.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, no wonder.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Yeah. And once again, I. I know it's not the same. Somebody sent me an email and said it's not the same national anthem that they used before in Germany. But it's still a little creepy.

[Tom Griswold]

The language, it's kind of a guttural. So interesting that it's close to. So close to the beautiful, mellifluous language of France. But no, it's a lot different. Yes, siree.

[Christy Lee]

Well, you know what happened on Saturday at the halftime. The Michigan. Penn State game. Michigan beats their butt. Wasn't talking to you. And welcome back. And Matt Leinert said, razzle dazzle. Christy. Oh, now you've infected the college game time.

[Chick McGee]

Santa Claus says it in a way. Fair commercial.

[Christy Lee]

Is that right?

[Chick McGee]

Because I like a house. Little razzle dazzle.

[Christy Lee]

Have you seen the John Travolta Santa Claus?

[Chick McGee]

I like it. I love them.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, he's walking around a Santa.

[Tom Griswold]

All right.

[Josh Arnold]

Something happened over the weekend where everybody put their Christmas lights on.

[Christy Lee]

He dances a Santa Claus.

[Josh Arnold]

Have you noticed that you have your Christmas lights on already?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, wow.

[Tom Griswold]

I know, it's against the rules.

[Christy Lee]

I thought you said you put them up and you weren't going to turn on.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, getting to turn off seems to be a technical issue.

[Chick McGee]

Technically, everybody else in his house wants them on. That's the technical.

[Tom Griswold]

Exactly.

[Christy Lee]

Let me talk to Josh for a second. How do you have that opinion of yourself? Because you know me, I'm the stuff that's not my fault. I'll take the blame. You know that. Me, too, but he just doesn't it's not me. I. I don't know what's going on with the lights. There's a technical issue.

[Chick McGee]

We could all learn a little something.

[Christy Lee]

Yes, I think that's what I want to learn. I want to be politics.

[Tom Griswold]

I missed my calling. I should have gone into politics.

[Christy Lee]

And then early on, he's playing music just like anything in the background on his board. Well, that wasn't me. The button was on. I don't know.

[Tom Griswold]

I gotta have Eddie come in here and fix it. The button was off.

[Christy Lee]

There it is. Button's off. I hear music. What? What song is that, Pat? I hear music.

[Chick McGee]

When no one from Sound of Music.

[Christy Lee]

Something, something.

[Tom Griswold]

That's the first sign of a stroke if you're hearing music right now.

[Chick McGee]

I smell orange.

[Tom Griswold]

So was Harbaugh on the field?

[Christy Lee]

No, he was at a hockey game Saturday night. The place went crazy in Michigan.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, I mean, obviously he was.

[Christy Lee]

He's not allowed.

[Tom Griswold]

He wasn't surprised that he got suspended. He saw the signals coming.

[Christy Lee]

What's the rule on laughing at your own jokes? What?

[Chick McGee]

It's a new laugh, too.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, it is a new laugh when.

[Chick McGee]

Some people do it. It's charming.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And pretty elaborate cheating scheme they had going. Yeah. So?

[Christy Lee]

Well, it was just like when the Astros got caught. Okay, what did I say?

[Chick McGee]

Or Nixon.

[Tom Griswold]

You say everybody did it.

[Christy Lee]

Everybody does it.

[Chick McGee]

They just happened to get caught.

[Christy Lee]

Why do you think college football, they don't have the talkback system in the helmets like they do in the NFL? Because gamesmanship is a stealing signals. It's as American as apple pie. Cheating on your tag.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, I stole an apple pie over the weekend.

[Christy Lee]

Absolutely.

[Josh Arnold]

Did you?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yeah. From a small mom and pop bakery.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

What? They had it on.

[Chick McGee]

I like to steal from places that.

[Christy Lee]

Feel it really wasn't on there.

[Tom Griswold]

That makes it more thrilling knowing you're really hurting someone.

[Chick McGee]

It was cooling on the sill. Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

I love it.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, by the way, really quick preview, closed circuit, just for the you folks.

[Christy Lee]

Here we go.

[Tom Griswold]

I had a pie from the pie lady over the weekend. Oh, it was good.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, good.

[Tom Griswold]

Your pie. Your pies are on the way for Thanksgiving.

[Christy Lee]

What's the update? The pies are good.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, delicious.

[Chick McGee]

Very much looking forward to it. Thank you.

[Tom Griswold]

Cookies were great. This is the season for pies and cookies. Yes, they're absolutely delicious.

[Christy Lee]

So now the pies we're going to get this year taste good? Oh, they're good, all right, sir. They're always good.

[Josh Arnold]

They always tastes good.

[Tom Griswold]

Just trying to get you excited about the holidays. Got some.

[Josh Arnold]

Great. I don't understand why everybody's skipping over Thanksgiving.

[Christy Lee]

You're skipping over Thanksgiving.

[Josh Arnold]

And you've said before Christmas like Thanksgiving.

[Christy Lee]

Is one of your favorite holidays.

[Tom Griswold]

We had a pre Thanksgiving Thanksgiving at my house over the weekend.

[Chick McGee]

Oh yeah, the friends giving with all your friends.

[Tom Griswold]

It's a friends giving?

[Josh Arnold]

We weren't there.

[Tom Griswold]

We're. I believe Josh said it best. It's her friends. Her friends giving?

[Chick McGee]

Her friends giving?

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Josh Arnold]

Why don't you have a friends giving for your friends?

[Tom Griswold]

Well, maybe I'll set it up now that I've learned how to do it.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, did you enjoy yourself?

[Tom Griswold]

It was great. I spent all day Friday and Saturday cleaning and all day Sunday cleaning. It was fun. My house. My house is edgewise great. Yeah, it was fun.

[Chick McGee]

Good.

[Christy Lee]

Haven't you said you're on record saying that your bathroom looks like a hood hotel bathroom? Like. Like no one's ever been in there when you leave it, right.

[Tom Griswold]

Nothing on the shelf, nothing on the counter. Everything's in drawers.

[Christy Lee]

Nothing. Nothing better than a nice warm home to come home.

[Tom Griswold]

But there's. I do have. I do have a soap squirter with a scent free soap in it.

[Christy Lee]

Ah, have you seen the dawn power show?

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, I have those. Love it.

[Christy Lee]

The powder. They squeeze, you know. Gotta get these, man. I got that makes that noise.

[Chick McGee]

Thomas. You guys have traditional Thanksgiving food?

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, good.

[Tom Griswold]

That's not what the pies were doing there.

[Josh Arnold]

Did make a turkey.

[Tom Griswold]

A turkey? My son Sam made a delicious turkey and roast beef.

[Christy Lee]

Where are you on the tofurky?

[Tom Griswold]

Not there.

[Christy Lee]

You don't like the turkey made out of tofu?

[Tom Griswold]

It's perfectly acceptable. It's just not my thing.

[Chick McGee]

I've actually never tried one, but.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, here. Here's what you go get one of the sponges in the office and then put it in in turkey gravy and squeeze it out. Then cut a up and eat it.

[Christy Lee]

No, no. So if someone was coming to your house and was a vegetarian and wanted a tofurkey, what would you tell them? Go piss up a rope. Happy Thanksgiving.

[Tom Griswold]

No, that's life. I would. I'd be happy to make them one. I made one several years ago, remember? No, I did make one. Yeah, absolutely.

[Christy Lee]

Do you shape it like a turkey?

[Tom Griswold]

No, it came in a thing and we. Yeah, I did. I did. I forgot about that. Yeah, I did one years ago for someone that wanted that.

[Christy Lee]

That's a bean curtain.

[Tom Griswold]

Then when they weren't looking, I took. I took real turkey juice, poured it all over the things that would taste Good. And then they seized and vomited. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Diarrhea. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Them vegetarians get real upset when you.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no. I did. I forgot. I did. I did do a non meat turkey several years ago.

[Christy Lee]

I am surprised you're not a turducken guy.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I don't like duck. Sorry.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. Ducks.

[Tom Griswold]

We were talking about this off the air. I. The one time I had duck, I told you a friend of mine shot it and I still had buckshot in it. Whatever you call it. Bit down on it and almost broke my tooth.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't think that's a good. Not all duck has buckshot in it.

[Tom Griswold]

No, that isn't the reason. The reason was it tastes like. It's incredibly greasy, man.

[Chick McGee]

I had. I like very crispy juice.

[Tom Griswold]

I wish I liked goose because that'd be a good reason to slaughter all the geese.

[Josh Arnold]

I could take you to a restaurant and you could have the duck bolognese and you would change your mind in a heartbeat. It's so good.

[Tom Griswold]

Good.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, maybe so good, but the turducken.

[Christy Lee]

Goose are the duck. Bon.

[Chick McGee]

Yes. So good. I really enjoy.

[Christy Lee]

For two, please.

[Chick McGee]

Of course.

[Josh Arnold]

That's right.

[Christy Lee]

Who wants to hear the NFL in German?

[Chick McGee]

Me.

[Christy Lee]

Here's Jonathan Taylor's touchdown yesterday.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, good.

[Christy Lee]

From Frankfurt.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I. I'm. I'm with you.

[Christy Lee]

I keep.

[Tom Griswold]

I keep getting into Dr. Strange Love.

[Chick McGee]

I start hiding in the basement.

[Christy Lee]

I'm not saying we're not going to get our hair must.

[Chick McGee]

I'm saying a little.

[Tom Griswold]

The halftime show lighting designed by Albert Spear. Little inside the Third Reich joke. Anybody?

[Greg Warren]

Hey.

[Christy Lee]

One more time.

[Tom Griswold]

Sorry.

[Christy Lee]

One more time. Ready?

[Tom Griswold]

Got to say touchdown once.

[Christy Lee]

What would have pleased you? 42. 41.

[Tom Griswold]

Gardner Minshew. Five touchdowns. That'd be nice. He.

[Chick McGee]

I bet it's really weird when there's a blitz.

[Tom Griswold]

Awkward.

[Chick McGee]

That's gotta be that scary.

[Tom Griswold]

Very awkward. Same word.

[Christy Lee]

It wasn't our idea to have a game in Germany, was it? We just need to point it out.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Good crowd.

[Christy Lee]

It was a good crowd. We're singing. They were singing Take Me Home Country Road.

[Chick McGee]

I heard that part. Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Mountain mama. And they have the. They have the words up on the scoreboard.

[Chick McGee]

It went crazy.

[Christy Lee]

They went nuts for it.

[Tom Griswold]

Not clear that either team is not from West Virginia. Apparently almost geography would be nice, but John Denver, by the way. Just. Just to confuse them.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

The Patriots flew to Poland.

[Chick McGee]

John Denver's German.

[Tom Griswold]

Just Chick. Chick pointed out John Denver's real name is like Deutschland.

[Christy Lee]

Right?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Right, Chick.

[Tom Griswold]

Deutschland. Hammer or something.

[Christy Lee]

I want to get back to accidentally Flying a pole. Is that where it all started?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, you don't want to use that. The GPS from 1939, very confusing.

[Christy Lee]

And I'm going to do it this way. One of my best friends is Polish. But my point is, is that where it all started, about Poland, because they really didn't put up a fight when they came in and just. All right, here. Here you go. Take our country.

[Tom Griswold]

No, no, not at all. The polls were very brave. I think it was the. I think many of the jokes, I think came from certain television shows in the 60s.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, that's how Cleveland started.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. The whole Cleveland thing with Goulardian, white socks and bowling. Oh, yeah, that was a big thing. If you wore white socks. If you were white. White socks to my junior high school.

[Christy Lee]

No good.

[Tom Griswold]

My friend John Higgins would come up to. He was huge. He'd come up to you, grab your ankles and lift you off the ground. Do you fell on your head? He thought that was hilarious. White socks.

[Christy Lee]

Sounds like Pollock. Did he leave anyone? Quadriplegic?

[Tom Griswold]

Practically. Yeah, I'm totally. He would walk up to you, especially because I was, you know, a quarter his size. He'd walk up if you had. If you wore white socks.

[Josh Arnold]

So apparently this happened to you.

[Tom Griswold]

Of course. Anybody. You could not wear white socks.

[Christy Lee]

So it was up to you.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm not kidding. You had to wear. You had to wear darker socks.

[Josh Arnold]

According to him. You had to wear.

[Tom Griswold]

No, it's kind of a thing. City wide.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay.

[Christy Lee]

City wide.

[Tom Griswold]

He would go. He would go. He'd come up to you and go polo and grab your ankles and pick you up.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, it sounds like a real winner.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Now he's a very distinguished bailiff, Supreme Court justice. He can give you a hell of a deal on a car.

[Ace Cosby]

Next up on the Bob and Tom show, some hills to die on. Plus some pet peeves. You want to come on back for that? This is the Bob and Tom Show. Happy Thanksgiving morning from all of us here at the Bob and Tom Show. This is Christopher speaking in this segment, hills to die on plus some pet peeves.

[Christy Lee]

Remember yesterday you were talking about hills you die on?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

You want to go ahead and review that so I can move forward?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. I think this is a fascinating topic. I think this is a fascinating topic. It's an example of something that really doesn't matter in the world, but it's something that you find incredibly irritating.

[Christy Lee]

Mine. Was that why? Because I love shrimp.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Why don't say mud vein. Why don't they take the tails off and they cook with shrimp, I'm not supposed to eat the tail and I gotta squeeze it apart. I get all that goo on my fingers.

[Josh Arnold]

Scampoo.

[Christy Lee]

Yes. Although I love scampi goo. You get one of those cheddar bay biscuits.

[Tom Griswold]

I mean, I think we determined that the shrimp thing, if it's like a shrimp cocktail, it's okay to have the.

[Josh Arnold]

Tail on it because you need it. Because you got to dip.

[Tom Griswold]

It's like a gripper.

[Christy Lee]

It's a handle.

[Chick McGee]

Squeeze it and boom it.

[Tom Griswold]

But if it's some kind of sauce with the shrimp in there, you don't have to want to dip in and get the sauce all over.

[Christy Lee]

I finally found a Chinese place that has married no shrimp tails and a decent shrimp meal.

[Chick McGee]

Really? Oh, that's great.

[Josh Arnold]

So are they the teeny tiny ones?

[Christy Lee]

No, no. Pretty good size.

[Chick McGee]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

Some of the other things on this list, this started on Reddit.

[Christy Lee]

I have some to add, but go ahead.

[Tom Griswold]

Utensils should be at the end of a buffet or a cafeteria.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't get that one. What's the point? I don't understand.

[Tom Griswold]

The point is I'd go to the cafeteria with my girls all the time.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

And always forget to take the silverware.

[Josh Arnold]

It's right there with the tray.

[Tom Griswold]

That doesn't mean I don't see it.

[Christy Lee]

He doesn't see it. Do you see the trays?

[Josh Arnold]

Well, he has to.

[Tom Griswold]

I have a. You got.

[Josh Arnold]

The food would fall through the.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

Hang on, Christie, you and I both know. Not necessarily. Okay, Christie's right.

[Tom Griswold]

Those.

[Christy Lee]

I can see you grabbing the jello, putting it on the.

[Tom Griswold]

On those bars.

[Christy Lee]

On the bars and falling right there. What the hell is this all about? Why you need a tracer?

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, what they do have, they do have. What do they call them? Setups. Which is knife, fork, spoon in a napkin wrapped up. They have a couple of them sometimes at the end in a. In a jar for like me that have to go back and get them cuz I forgot to pick them up cuz I'm. I'm. I'm dealing with, you know, a seven year old. Ten year old. Yes. I'm wrangling kids. They have friends along that all they want to do is look at the jello, which they get and never eat.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, I looked at the cafeteria wistfully yesterday I was open, I didn't have time but.

[Tom Griswold]

But these, these are so like hills that one would die on. What's. What do you have?

[Christy Lee]

Why push the already lit up elevator floor button? It's not like it's Going to get you the elevator any faster?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. That's a little annoying when you see somebody doing that.

[Tom Griswold]

I do that all the time, however.

[Josh Arnold]

Why do you do that?

[Christy Lee]

I think we should go faster. Push the button a number of times corresponding to the floor you're going to. Correct.

[Josh Arnold]

I do not do that.

[Chick McGee]

What?

[Josh Arnold]

You push the button 13 times if you're going. Well, they're not 13.

[Christy Lee]

Not a lot of 13 floors.

[Josh Arnold]

12 times if you're going to the 12th floor.

[Christy Lee]

So if you're saying, if I'm getting an elevator and I'm going to the 12th floor, I'm going to push the up button 12 times.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Yep. That's what I'm doing. Yep.

[Josh Arnold]

All right.

[Christy Lee]

And the number changes what floor I'm going to. And I've never been trapped in an elevator. You know what?

[Chick McGee]

Then we may.

[Christy Lee]

Or been stuck in an elevator.

[Chick McGee]

Here's a good hill. Steve says dip containers such as French onion, ranch, nacho cheese, bean salsa, et cetera, should all be made like hummus containers. More flat and wide, so it's easier to scoop without getting residue on your hands. Some of us fatties refuse to spoon out a reasonable portion and prefer to dip straight from the container. I think he's right.

[Josh Arnold]

Huh.

[Chick McGee]

Nothing worse than dip residue on your hand.

[Tom Griswold]

I think if you see someone and they don't return the cart. The shopping cart.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, that drives me crazy.

[Tom Griswold]

Gonna return it to the. To the cart corral. Cart corral. You should be able to run them over.

[Josh Arnold]

Well, that's a little harsh with an.

[Tom Griswold]

Automobile or a truck.

[Christy Lee]

What I like to do is when I take my cart back, if I see someone in a car getting ready to back out, I'll. I'll leave the cart there.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, nice.

[Christy Lee]

And then walk back to my car. And then when they back out, they hit the cart. It's funny.

[Chick McGee]

Very good.

[Christy Lee]

Hilarious.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, when you get to the cart, Coral, if you give it the shove from 20ft away.

[Christy Lee]

Absolutely.

[Tom Griswold]

And then it goes in, but doesn't hit that little piece of metal on the ground and starts backing up. Do you go rescue it or.

[Christy Lee]

That was one of my favorite commercials of all time, was that. It was for the PGA Tour, I think. And one of the golfers, I'm not sure which one it was, did that from, like 50ft away right into the cart corral. And the line was, these guys are good. The PGA Tour this weekend on cv.

[Josh Arnold]

Do you ever have that where you go, do I take the cart inside or do I go to the corral? Because you're Almost equidistant. And you're like, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

There used to be a guy online that would sit in parking lots waiting for someone not to take a cart back. And he would run over with the camera and say, why aren't you going to take this cart back? What's your problem?

[Josh Arnold]

Are you serious?

[Christy Lee]

People got mad.

[Tom Griswold]

Have you seen the.

[Christy Lee]

I punched him in the face.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

Horrible.

[Tom Griswold]

How about that thing they have that has like a motorized cart corral assist for the folks that are bringing the cart. The car.

[Josh Arnold]

I haven't seen that.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

In Florida they have the. Down the s. Escalator cart. That's kind of. That's fine.

[Tom Griswold]

I've only seen that once.

[Josh Arnold]

They have that at the Target in Chicago by my daughter's house. Oh, yeah, yeah. Where you take the. You have to put your cart on an escalator to get up to the second floor.

[Christy Lee]

It's a whole new world. If you're talking two floors in the Target.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

It opens up a whole lot.

[Josh Arnold]

It's amazing upstairs.

[Tom Griswold]

Heaven.

[Christy Lee]

Unbelievable.

[Tom Griswold]

That's great. Yeah. So anyways, Hills you would die on. If you want to send us yours. And again, we understand that the. In the world that we live in, these are very, very minor. Oh, yeah, here's six more.

[Chick McGee]

But the one I did was literally ignored by all of you. So I'm not going to do it.

[Tom Griswold]

But the. The trays for ranch dressing.

[Chick McGee]

No, like hummus. Like a hummus.

[Josh Arnold]

We did not ignore you.

[Christy Lee]

I guess I didn't understand.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't understand it.

[Christy Lee]

I thought the holes were. I thought the dip containers were pretty much uniform. I didn't know that some were smaller openings for dip than others.

[Chick McGee]

You know Steve, he's the guy who wrote in. Not everybody will get us. It's just.

[Greg Warren]

It's the world that we're cursed to live in.

[Christy Lee]

I have a vague one. I have a teeny tiny, narrow cast one. My smallest hill is when I have passengers in the back seat of my Mustang.

[Tom Griswold]

Nice.

[Christy Lee]

When they get out, the front seat has to be moved back. I don't care what. They will have to then move the seat forward to get back in. It just looks better being in the back position when I'm driving my Mustang.

[Tom Griswold]

Again, a small hill.

[Chick McGee]

I love it. This is an example of a good joke with a better sign off. Sometimes we know if the joke isn't 100%, the sign off can carry it the rest of the way. I will do it as written. The smallest hill I would die on is a C cup. Thank you very much. Your head right there forever. Thank you very much as well.

[Christy Lee]

Thank you very much. No A cups.

[Tom Griswold]

No B cups.

[Christy Lee]

He actually. Wait. But he actually typed thank you very much. I love it.

[Tom Griswold]

Gary writes my hill to die on. There are four ghosts in A Christmas Carol, not three.

[Josh Arnold]

Four.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, he's right. Bob Marley is Bob Marley. Jacob Marley is.

[Christy Lee]

No, that's Bob Marley.

[Tom Griswold]

That would be funny. That'd be funny if Bob Marley was the first goat. The ghost of Christmas Reggae.

[Christy Lee]

So it's past, it's present, future past.

[Tom Griswold]

His former partner, Jacob Marley, is a ghost.

[Josh Arnold]

Right.

[Tom Griswold]

Right at the beginning. Isn't he the first one that wanders in the bedroom?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, eating the gruel. I'm not sure if the Mr. Magoo Christmas Carol gets. Wait a minute.

[Christy Lee]

Who's eating gruel?

[Josh Arnold]

Cruelty.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Eating gruel in A Christmas Carol?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

That must be just in the book.

[Tom Griswold]

Well, maybe it's in the Mr. Magoo version, which to me is.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, I think that's in the book. He's sleeping.

[Tom Griswold]

Doesn't the gruel make him restless? Isn't that the whole thing?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, it may. It may.

[Tom Griswold]

You ever had gruel?

[Josh Arnold]

Isn't it oatmeal?

[Chick McGee]

That bird feed?

[Josh Arnold]

I thought it was just oatmeal.

[Chick McGee]

It's similar, isn't it?

[Josh Arnold]

Cream of weed or something.

[Tom Griswold]

We have another assignment for Ms. Hooker to make us.

[Josh Arnold]

By the way, how do you spell gruel?

[Christy Lee]

G R, U, E, L. That's what I thought.

[Tom Griswold]

It's like, not the answer to Wordle.

[Christy Lee]

Today with a gr.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, boy.

[Tom Griswold]

We also had asked Ms. Hooker to make us some possum. I have received several letters saying how terrible possum tastes.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, people have.

[Josh Arnold]

We're not having possum.

[Christy Lee]

There are people that have a taste for it, though, and I don't know why.

[Josh Arnold]

Gruel is a food consisting of some type of cereal, such as ground oats, wheat, rye or rice, heated and boiled in milk or water. There you go.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, I think. But gruel has gotten a bad name.

[Josh Arnold]

Thinner version of porridge. Yeah, it just sounds horrible.

[Tom Griswold]

I did eat porridge last year.

[Josh Arnold]

Porridge is just another name for oatmeal as well.

[Tom Griswold]

Not the place I go. It's called porridge.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay. What it tastes like.

[Tom Griswold]

So if you said orphanage, were you at.

[Christy Lee]

You said, I like a bowl of porridge and I like a bowl of oatmeal. There are two different things.

[Tom Griswold]

It was porridge.

[Josh Arnold]

What was it?

[Chick McGee]

What it tastes like.

[Josh Arnold]

What it tastes like?

[Christy Lee]

It was delicious.

[Tom Griswold]

It was kind of grainy.

[Christy Lee]

Grainy? You mean like ice Milk.

[Chick McGee]

It was like.

[Tom Griswold]

It looked. It looked like. It looked like kitty litter, but with kind of a little bit of milk on it.

[Josh Arnold]

Like oatmeal.

[Chick McGee]

Like grape nuts.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, but it wasn't oaty. I don't know.

[Josh Arnold]

Was it sweet?

[Christy Lee]

It sounds good.

[Tom Griswold]

Good. It was very good.

[Christy Lee]

Looks like kitty litter. Oh, milk on it.

[Josh Arnold]

Was it at that hoity toity place? You go there, there's no parking and you have to wait outside for a table. Oh, yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Sorry to bother you.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

Yes. Hey, sorry to bother you.

[Tom Griswold]

And contextually, we need to point out that we know that the world's going to hell right now, but these are minor problems that I think are fixable.

[Christy Lee]

Well, we've got a problem with the person. A person has a problem with us because we're not. These aren't hills to die on.

[Tom Griswold]

Really.

[Christy Lee]

They're nothing more than pet peeves. Says Justin.

[Josh Arnold]

That's kind of true.

[Christy Lee]

With all due respect to you morons.

[Chick McGee]

Very good.

[Tom Griswold]

I think we've clarified most of the.

[Christy Lee]

He gives an example. Most of the hills to die on. You're reading just pet peeves. Ship shopping cart.

[Tom Griswold]

My pet peeve is the word ship.

[Christy Lee]

Shopping carts in the car corral Isn't a hill. It's a peeve. A better example of a hill to die on would be something against popular opinion. For instance, Godfather 3, best installment in the trilogy. I'll die on that hill.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, he's wrong.

[Chick McGee]

Okay. All right. Wow.

[Christy Lee]

It's stating that despite being an unpopular take, you swear by it and will not be convinced otherwise. I think. I think Justin has a point.

[Josh Arnold]

Justin is right.

[Tom Griswold]

I think he's right. I think this is, however, a minor shade of clarification on his part.

[Christy Lee]

This is from Marge. This might be my pet peeve. And it might be why I doordash and I don't go out. This might be the number one reason. Trying to go through a drive through. It's impossible anymore to go through a drive thru.

[Chick McGee]

What's gone wrong?

[Josh Arnold]

What's wrong?

[Christy Lee]

I will die on that hill.

[Josh Arnold]

What do you mean?

[Christy Lee]

Ever get behind someone in a drive thru and they act like they've never seen the restaurant, the sign, the items. Then they ask, well, what kind of fish is it? I've worked in fast food says Marge hate when people do that. And the kids. I would go through the drive through and I would make sure that everybody knew what we wanted and before we got there, even if I had to, even if I had to scream at.

[Josh Arnold]

Them or pull the car over, I'm going to pull this car over.

[Chick McGee]

Relax, Marge, it's not that big of a deal.

[Christy Lee]

Really. Are you super? Are you all zen?

[Chick McGee]

And the food will get in your face soon enough and.

[Christy Lee]

That's right.

[Josh Arnold]

I'd like to read Tom's, but I.

[Tom Griswold]

Just want to defend all the hard working people at drive thrus. Have you ever gone through a chick fil A? They haven't. They have it down.

[Christy Lee]

They have guns that have sour cream in them in the drive thru. It's built for speed. What's happening?

[Tom Griswold]

Do they have a home division? A home version of that?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, I wish.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm sure they do. Go to Amazon. They have everything.

[Christy Lee]

A restaurant supply store.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, there's a three day waiting sour cream gun for the big.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, you have to fill out a background check, but still.

[Tom Griswold]

I'd like a sour cream gun, please. Once again, when we say hills to Diane. We. We are. We understand how minor these are. And yet would I end up on.

[Christy Lee]

The news if I tried to rob a bank with a sour cream gun?

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

That would make the International.

[Chick McGee]

I'll help with bail. That'd be huge.

[Tom Griswold]

That would make the International.

[Josh Arnold]

We'd go viral.

[Christy Lee]

Let's do it.

[Tom Griswold]

We've had dumber things happen with fake guns, but that's a pretty good.

[Josh Arnold]

You can still land in prison for that though.

[Chick McGee]

20 years.

[Christy Lee]

It's a sour cream gun.

[Josh Arnold]

It doesn't matter.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah, we've had. Don't people go to jail? They've used their fingers in a coat.

[Christy Lee]

No.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, you'll be finding out a lot about fingers when you get to prison.

[Christy Lee]

I'm outgoing.

[Tom Griswold]

No, it's the incoming that you got to worry about. I'm sorry, Chris, do you have a heel to die on?

[Josh Arnold]

Well, this guy was backing me up on the turn signal issue and I'd love to read his email. Tom, I thank you for listening. A delivery driver in Michigan. He says he's actually born and raised in Jackson, but it's a run on sentence with no punctuation and I don't have enough breath for it, so. But he did say that very few people are using turn signs signals anymore. It's very hard for him to make deliveries.

[Christy Lee]

It sounded like a criticism.

[Chick McGee]

That was a humble judge.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

Here we go.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm sure he talked in through the phone with Siri, but as you know.

[Tom Griswold]

I like to have a clean car. Yeah, I go to the car wash almost every day.

[Chick McGee]

Twice.

[Christy Lee]

Sometimes three or four. I do have a beef almost always twice a day.

[Tom Griswold]

Although I will say the people who work at the Car wash are fantastic. And they're the nicest people. I don't know how they do.

[Chick McGee]

Stop being afraid to defend somebody.

[Christy Lee]

My God, would you just take a stand on somebody? You know why you do this? You know why?

[Chick McGee]

Because psychologically, you really do hate everybody.

[Christy Lee]

Yes, that's why you keep saying I like. To clarify, I said I love everybody even though I hate everyone. You're not helping yourself.

[Tom Griswold]

These are lies. Christy, you'll back me up.

[Josh Arnold]

What's your beef?

[Tom Griswold]

You like a nice car? Yes, chick, you have a nice car. Ace, you can't go through a car wash because your back window is made of.

[Christy Lee]

It's only been that way for a week and a half.

[Tom Griswold]

Dry cleaning plastic from my office covering his window. Martinize, I can't loan you my Suburban anymore. I've loaned it to somebody else.

[Chick McGee]

He never wanted it. He never wanted it.

[Tom Griswold]

I offered it to him.

[Christy Lee]

Stop talking about your Suburban.

[Chick McGee]

I don't have it, you bastard. The turn signal's too loud in that car.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay, fine. This is the hill I would die on, writes Jason. At the drive through car wash. They don't space the cars out when you go through.

[Chick McGee]

He's right. He's right.

[Tom Griswold]

They keep going, move forward. I don't want to hit the guy in front of.

[Josh Arnold]

I don't either.

[Christy Lee]

I don't care about hitting them.

[Chick McGee]

That's my wash.

[Christy Lee]

I'm not sharing this wash.

[Chick McGee]

Exactly.

[Josh Arnold]

And the dry. I don't want to share my dry with that guy.

[Chick McGee]

He's right. You're all right.

[Tom Griswold]

I want to hit him. The other thing is, I want the mirror back so I don't ruin my expensive tires when they aren't paying attention.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, my new car has that camera on the front so I can. It's awesome. Your car. I know, has that, too.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, well, that would require reading the manual. I don't have that kind of time. Thank you, Christy. Could I just be.

[Christy Lee]

Time to bitch about it?

[Tom Griswold]

That's right. Rather do that. I gotta have someone to come and check.

[Christy Lee]

I heard you in the hallway, by the way, talking to somebody about a cement truck driver. What were you talking about? Oh, we were all sitting in here going, this is going to be good. And you started out with, you know, get a load of this guy.

[Tom Griswold]

No, I had someone help me with a minor thing at my house, and Osay had a guy do some, what's. What do you call?

[Josh Arnold]

Grout.

[Tom Griswold]

Grout work. And he didn't wipe the grout down properly. And now the grout has dried all over the tile.

[Chick McGee]

Can't that happened to me in a sink? Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

And we're trying to figure out how you can. You can rub the grout off without scratching the tile. I don't know if there's a way to do that. If there's.

[Christy Lee]

You just have to moisten it enough and get it all wet.

[Tom Griswold]

I don't know. Well, we need to talk to a pro. But we could get back to things we're bitching about. What else have you got over there? Anybody? So your house.

[Chick McGee]

Blowing one's nose at a table in a restaurant. Go to the effing restroom, says Darryl. He's right.

[Tom Griswold]

He's right. Now, wait a second. Now. What's your philosophy on. Excuse me? Not your philosophy. What's your policy on blowing your nose into a cloth napkin?

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, that was going to be my.

[Chick McGee]

You take that cloth napkin into the bathroom, whether you're blowing or wiping, and.

[Josh Arnold]

Then you throw it in the trash because you don't want that.

[Tom Griswold]

Really?

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

You don't use the cloth?

[Chick McGee]

No, of course.

[Josh Arnold]

First of all, of course not.

[Tom Griswold]

You don't.

[Josh Arnold]

No way.

[Tom Griswold]

What if it's an emergency?

[Josh Arnold]

You go to the restroom.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

You've blown your nose in a cloth napkin.

[Tom Griswold]

Maybe recently.

[Chick McGee]

Maybe recently.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, my monster.

[Tom Griswold]

Then I roll it up so that the server doesn't have to touch it necessarily.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. You're always thinking of others, aren't you?

[Josh Arnold]

I can't believe you did that. I actually had a girlfriend who. A guy did that on a date. She never went out with him again. Ever.

[Chick McGee]

That's a deal breaker.

[Christy Lee]

Any of this.

[Tom Griswold]

You know what?

[Chick McGee]

That's a hill I'll die on. I don't like a girl to tell me no. That's right.

[Christy Lee]

There you go.

[Chick McGee]

Ever.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

What the hell's that all about?

[Christy Lee]

This is a contract dinner is what you did.

[Chick McGee]

I'm trying to compliment. Compliment you with my body.

[Ace Cosby]

We'll wrap things up on this Thanksgiving morning with some more pet peeves and some elevator tips. In case you're wondering, this is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Christy Lee]

Bob and Tom.

[Ace Cosby]

This is the Bob and Tom show from all of us here. Have a great Thanksgiving. One more segment on this Thursday morning. More pet peeves and some elevator tips.

[Christy Lee]

There's Tom Griswold over there. Looks like he's filling out his time card.

[Tom Griswold]

From where I'm sitting, I'm. I'm reading about a. A pet peeve update. Actually, we'll get to it in just a second.

[Christy Lee]

Okay.

[Tom Griswold]

I'm trying to figure out how to pronounce this guy's last name.

[Christy Lee]

You know what hill I would die on? If you could just fake like you're paying attention while we're talking, that would be.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, yeah. What'd you say?

[Christy Lee]

I know. Now he's licking his stir stick. Oh, one of those wooden stir sticks.

[Tom Griswold]

You have to go wood in his mouth.

[Josh Arnold]

Got to go wood.

[Christy Lee]

Got to go wood.

[Josh Arnold]

Can't go plastic.

[Tom Griswold]

Nothing better than a wooden sailboat or a wooden stir stick. That's what I say.

[Christy Lee]

Out there in your top siders.

[Josh Arnold]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

You and Ted.

[Tom Griswold]

This is. We were talking about various things that are annoying.

[Christy Lee]

We're calling them hills to die on, not pet peeves. Right?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Small hills. You would die. Okay, you want to give me an example?

[Christy Lee]

I tails on shrimp in.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, yeah. You don't like that?

[Chick McGee]

I don't like.

[Christy Lee]

I get like a mess of noodles or rice or whatever, and they're delicious shrimp and they all have tails on them. So take the tails off.

[Tom Griswold]

Unless it's for a shrimp cocktail where you use the. As handles for the.

[Christy Lee]

Of course.

[Chick McGee]

Right.

[Christy Lee]

Tails on. Yes.

[Tom Griswold]

All right. We had a couple of them bought elevators. Now, annoying it is when someone gets in the elevator, presses the button of the floor they're going to several times. This is from an elevator technician. His name is Joe.

[Josh Arnold]

Hi, Joe.

[Tom Griswold]

His last name.

[Christy Lee]

Mama.

[Tom Griswold]

There's like rzdj. There's a lot of. A lot of consonants in there, Joe. But thank you for taking the.

[Christy Lee]

Joe the friend.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Oh, I. I'm not sure. This. This looks like deep into Eastern Europe, this place. He's Polish. Now he lives. He has a nice summer place. He says Torch Lake. Lake Bel Air, Michigan. Thank you. He is an elevator technician said sometimes if you hold the door, the door close button while pressing the floor you want to go to, you can take an express right to that floor.

[Chick McGee]

Hmm.

[Josh Arnold]

What?

[Christy Lee]

Okay, now what are you saying?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. I experienced this in a place I used to live in New York. Yeah. If you press the floor you want to go to and press the closed door button and hold it, it skips all the other floors. Not all elevators do this, but I had the one in my building did.

[Christy Lee]

Do you have any idea? Poor people waiting with the trouble you've caused across America by what you've just.

[Tom Griswold]

Said, you can blame Joe.

[Christy Lee]

Now you wait and see. Tonight on the national news, elevators short out all across the country, millions stranded.

[Tom Griswold]

Not all elevators, but some. Turns it into an express. How convenient is that?

[Christy Lee]

That's irresponsible.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Then sometimes you're in a hurry, please take the time of Trouble to send us your particular annoyance. We'd love to hear from you.

[Christy Lee]

And everybody knows when you take an elevator, when you push the button. You push the button to correspond to the number of floor you're going to.

[Josh Arnold]

No, you don't.

[Christy Lee]

If you're going to floor seven, you push her seven times. It's just that simple.

[Josh Arnold]

Sure.

[Tom Griswold]

That's good luck. It's an OCD thing.

[Christy Lee]

No, it makes sense. Or the elevator. You don't know where you're gonna end up.

[Tom Griswold]

What else is going on over at the sports desk?

[Christy Lee]

Oh, Tom would be interested in knowing. It's. This email begins. You know what the definition of hell is, Josh? Repetition.

[Chick McGee]

That's right.

[Christy Lee]

Tom would be interested in knowing. During last night's football game, with 349 to go in the fourth quarter between the Titans and the Steelers in Pittsburgh, Al Michaels used the phrase razzle dazzle to describe a Titans attempt at a trick play. Also, three weeks ago when Texas played Oklahoma, it was used during that game and three other times over that football weekend. I take it all back. This guy Andy is not to be messed with. He's been doing a lot of research.

[Chick McGee]

Also, Tom, I was watching Halloween Resurrection with Busta Rhymes. My God, is that the worst in the franchise? Easily. But Busta Rhymes uses the phrase razzle dazzle in that film.

[Tom Griswold]

And the reason this is a controversy is because I contend that it was used on a. On a game and you guys all poo pooed. It said, no, no one would ever use that phrase. However, it appears to be.

[Christy Lee]

I remember saying that. And no one ever uses that. And maybe. Maybe I misspoke. No, I'm. I'm certain I misspoke. I didn't mean no one ever uses it. I meant that only people over 80 use it. That's what I meant. Hence broadcasting legend in quotes for me, Al Michaels. Yeah, you would.

[Tom Griswold]

I just think it's. I love the trick. Play something to make. Make the game exciting. I can't wait. Someday someone's going to do the Statue of Liberty again and I'll be so happy.

[Christy Lee]

Well, they do it all the time. Yes. Somebody won a bowl game not that long ago. The Statue of Liberty, Boise State or somebody.

[Tom Griswold]

Give me a tape of that way.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, yeah, I'll do that. Hey, Chickster, this email starts. So you're looking for a nickname for Victor Wembanyama, right? Oh, hold on to yourselves. So my buddy and I are watching the World Series and enjoy enjoying beer. This is in the email. And the spurs game comes on. Another Screen at the bar we're at. My man says, I don't like watching the spurs anymore. He said drunkenly, too much talk about Wally Obama. I thought it was hilarious. The beer being over served might have added to that, but I still think it's funny. And I wrote it down so I could tell you about it.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, that's cute.

[Christy Lee]

That's. That's cute. I don't think we should use Wally.

[Chick McGee]

It is funny.

[Christy Lee]

It is. It is funny.

[Tom Griswold]

He's French, right?

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, he speaks French. Is there some smarter than me speaks French and English? And did you see his Halloween outfit?

[Josh Arnold]

No.

[Christy Lee]

Terrifying. He was Slender Man.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, really?

[Christy Lee]

Looked just like Slender Man. It was nuts. You know who Slender man is?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Chick McGee]

It must have been scary.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, it was terrifying.

[Tom Griswold]

Cool. Well, we'll keep looking. I got a nice letter here, Josh.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, yes.

[Tom Griswold]

Even though it's early in the morning on November 3rd. Hey, Josh. Just finished listening to your new comedy album. It's absolutely hysterically funny.

[Chick McGee]

Oh, thank you very much.

[Tom Griswold]

My jaw got a Charlie horse from laughing.

[Chick McGee]

And that's all also in reference to a bit of mine. Yeah.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, okay.

[Chick McGee]

Thank you very much.

[Tom Griswold]

A little comedy piece of yours. I'm familiar with that. Very, very funny.

[Josh Arnold]

It is racy.

[Tom Griswold]

Let's just leave it right there.

[Christy Lee]

Do you rely on naughty language?

[Chick McGee]

Oh, it's just filth and innuendo.

[Tom Griswold]

I think it could be called situational. Yeah, Situational. Charlie horse. I guess it would be. Nate, thank you for taking the time and trouble to write.

[Chick McGee]

I'm glad.

[Tom Griswold]

Right now we return to the world of sports.

[Christy Lee]

Victor Wembanyama. In just his fifth NBA game. He's 19 years old. He scored 38 points, 10 rebounds and two blocks, and the San Antonio spurs beat the.

[Chick McGee]

Vicky. Vicky. Wh. Whim.

[Tom Griswold]

We're trying to get a nickname.

[Christy Lee]

I've got a different.

[Tom Griswold]

A different approach.

[Josh Arnold]

What a pad.

[Tom Griswold]

You're gonna have to.

[Christy Lee]

Wait a minute. I like Vicky. Vicky.

[Chick McGee]

I do, too.

[Christy Lee]

That's really good.

[Tom Griswold]

You're gonna have to help me here, Pat.

[Chick McGee]

All right.

[Christy Lee]

Okay. I will not forget.

[Tom Griswold]

I have not given you any kind of a cue or tip, so just get to it. He's trying to hit.

[Christy Lee]

He's got the mic and the stuff in there.

[Chick McGee]

All the files are open.

[Tom Griswold]

You're gonna need your falsetto. Ready?

[Chick McGee]

All right.

[Tom Griswold]

Okay. You can all help me out. It says wembanyano. Wembanyano.

[Chick McGee]

It's going to be court. Yes.

[Christy Lee]

He's got big balls.

[Tom Griswold]

I can't get. Can you get up that high?

[Josh Arnold]

Sure.

[Tom Griswold]

That's it.

[Christy Lee]

I'm at the top.

[Tom Griswold]

It'd be great if you were. It would be really cool if he played for the Detroit Lions.

[Josh Arnold]

Yeah, sure. That would make a lot more sense.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah. So it's kind of a.

[Christy Lee]

See, that's an. And that's football.

[Tom Griswold]

I know.

[Christy Lee]

He'd be open all the time in the end zone.

[Chick McGee]

Who's gonna jump up and block it?

[Tom Griswold]

One tackle and he's done.

[Christy Lee]

Ah, that's true. He break him right now.

[Tom Griswold]

Oh, he broke his femur. Okay.

[Christy Lee]

Who's that down on the field?

[Chick McGee]

Al, it looks like Vicky. Vicky Webway has gone crashy, crashy, boom, boom. Oh, boy.

[Christy Lee]

French guts everywhere.

[Tom Griswold]

It gets tackled and voila. That's en francais.

[Christy Lee]

I know when I say I, it's the royal eye. That's not right at all. All of us know how much you love the state of Michigan.

[Tom Griswold]

Yes.

[Christy Lee]

Ergo, anything from Michigan. Anything having to do with Michigan. Well, Mr. They better circle the wagons up there in Ann Arbor. There's mounting pressure on Big Ten commissioner. You do not make fun of his name.

[Josh Arnold]

Okay?

[Chick McGee]

I hear you.

[Christy Lee]

I'm talking to you, Josh. Okay, I know you won't. You're.

[Josh Arnold]

I'm a girl.

[Christy Lee]

You're a kind. Yeah, and.

[Tom Griswold]

Go ahead.

[Chick McGee]

I'll behave myself.

[Christy Lee]

Big Ten commissioner Tony Pittitti. Stop it. What did I just say?

[Chick McGee]

Isn't he part of a deciding body of people?

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, it's a committee.

[Christy Lee]

Anybody puts it.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, you think I'm.

[Christy Lee]

I think I'm joking. Get pens, pens. Get pens out.

[Greg Warren]

Papers.

[Josh Arnold]

I got paper.

[Tom Griswold]

Big Ten commissioner Tony T, O, N.

[Christy Lee]

Y. T, O, N, Y.

[Chick McGee]

Check.

[Christy Lee]

Last name, capital P. Check. E, T, right? I. Yep. D. Oops.

[Tom Griswold]

T. Oh, no.

[Christy Lee]

I.

[Tom Griswold]

That's petitty. All right, so that's a small group. So what's the Itty Bitty Committee? Okay.

[Josh Arnold]

Oh, my gosh. That poor guy. Middle school had to suck for him.

[Christy Lee]

Tony needs to discipline Michigan coach Jim Harbaugh for that sign stealing scheme. This is not going away. Petitty. All right. Well done. Heard from frustrated and angry Big Ten coaches during a video call Wednesday. According to two people with knowledge of the situation. I wasn't one of them. NCAA is investigating Michigan for impermissible in person scouting.

[Chick McGee]

Oh.

[Christy Lee]

Michigan staffer alleged to have sent people to future opponents games for the purpose of video recording signals from off the field, into the field, what plays were called. And listen to this. Remember when Michigan and TCU just beat the hell out of them in that playoffs years ago? TCU came back. Well, apparently TCU gave out fake signals when they knew they were being nice.

[Tom Griswold]

So it's.

[Christy Lee]

That's how they backfired them. You can make the assumption if you'd like to leap and have a paranoid mind like I do.

[Tom Griswold]

Double agents.

[Christy Lee]

Exactly.

[Chick McGee]

That's great.

[Tom Griswold]

Now, if you call Tony Petitti's house titti resident, his son, Tony Jr. You gotta ask if you want big pittitties or a little pittitty.

[Chick McGee]

Right? Yeah. You need to make it clear.

[Tom Griswold]

Yeah, the big pitti.

[Chick McGee]

Yeah. Oh, I like Pitts, but the. Their house apparently parties every week, and they like to get people together and play that wonderful Hasbro game where people get entwined with one another. Have you ever played pateti twister?

[Christy Lee]

Never.

[Chick McGee]

I never have. Oh, the whole family. Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

[Tom Griswold]

This is the Bob and Tom Show.

[Josh Arnold]

Bob and Tom named one of the best personal finance podcasts. The Stacking Benjamin show with Joe and his friends makes financial literacy fun.

[Tom Griswold]

Draymond Green has a podcast. He was asking Mark Cuban why, at the beginning of 2024, Cuban sold a.

[Christy Lee]

Huge part of his company.

[Tom Griswold]

He's like, did you see how much money I got? I'm sure there's a more graceful answer than that, but, dude, I bought it for 200 million and sold it for 6 billion.

[Chick McGee]

I don't think it was that much more graceful than that.

[Josh Arnold]

Find out more by searching the Stacking Benjamin's podcast wherever you listen.