The BOB & TOM Show Free Podcast

Episode: -VIP Free Trial- March 5, 2026

Main Theme & Overview

This episode of The BOB & TOM Show is a lively blend of the usual: morning show banter, comedic musical numbers from Pat Godwin, listener letters, a nostalgia-deep dive into breakfast cereals, notable sports and news commentary, and special guest segments with standup comedians Kelly Collette and Al Jackson—plus "Sexy Time" relationship advice with Ali Breen. The episode spotlights the group’s signature mix of off-the-cuff humor, absurd storytelling, and relatable personal anecdotes, especially centered around the strange rituals, mishaps, and trivia of everyday American life.

Key Segments and Insights

1. Opening Announcements & VIP Transition

Timestamps: 00:00–00:36

• Tom and Bob open with an update for listeners about transitioning to a new VIP podcast system, citing outdated tech and encouraging users to watch for changes.
  • "You may notice that your feed might stop working—please get today's show on YouTube or on our free podcast feed." (Bob Kevoian, 00:19)

2. Pat Godwin’s Musical Opener – “Go Out Drinking”

Timestamps: 00:58–03:44

• Pat kicks off with a comedic original song about his wild drinking adventures, with vivid snapshots of chaos, from crashing at a VFW to drunkenly stealing a yacht.
  • "You ought to go with me when I go out drinking… I leave her all my roaches in the guacamole!" (Pat Godwin, 02:06)
  • Memorable moment: Other hosts throw in humorous asides, including Tom suggesting, “We'll do shooters of tequila and a case of beer a piece...” (02:50)

3. Morning Banter & Cereal Discussion

Timestamps: 04:00–12:44

• The crew discusses the rare satisfaction of finishing a box of cereal and milk at the exact same time.
  • "That last bowl coincided perfectly with the milk. With the last bit of milk." (Josh Arnold, 05:10)
  • Spirals into a comedic exploration of favorite cereals, cereal trivia, and cereal-related mishaps (e.g., Grape Nuts hardening in bowls, the origins of Corn Flakes, and why certain cereals were invented).

Notable Quotes:

• On cereal origins: “Cornflakes was invented by a guy that… had an anti-masturbation campaign.” (Tom Griswold, 06:40)
• “There's still boxes from that original run [of Grape Nuts] still out there.” (Tom Griswold, 08:28)

4. Listener Letters, Personal Routines, & Pet Antics

Timestamps: 13:20–16:47

• The group reads listener emails on topics like dogs in beds and kids sleeping in dog beds, plus Tom muses about novelty sleeping bags shaped like animals.
  • “There are two dog beds in my bedroom and yet he did not want to be in one of them. By the way, in the other dog bed was my daughter—heart. I wish I was kidding.” (Bob Kevoian, 15:37)
• They riff on eccentric sleep habits, pets, and absurdities in family life.

5. News Recap: Trapeze Urban Legend, Naked Crime Stories

Timestamps: 27:13–28:18

• The hosts debunk a viral story about a trapeze performer suffering diarrhea above a crowd. Pat Godwin delivers a song parody about it.
  • “He floats through the air with the greatest of ease / The daring young man with the flying feces.” (Pat Godwin, 27:55)

6. Listener Letters: Birds, T-shirt Cannons, and Absurd Mishaps

Timestamps: 18:09–26:50

• Bird collisions with windows, turkey mishaps, T-shirt cannons at live shows, injuries from thrown objects, and owl box jokes—all serve as jumping-off points for rapid-fire storytelling and bits.
  • “A guitar pick? How would that hurt?” (Christy Lee, 20:12)
  • “We have a letter saying, have you tried putting Tootsie Pops in the owl box?” (Josh Arnold, 20:32)

7. Cereal Box Prizes and Nostalgia

Timestamps: 41:28–47:18

• The group waxes nostalgic about cereal box toys, prizes, and “Geneva Convention” cereal rules in childhood homes.
  • “The first cereal surprise was a booklet called the Funny Jungle Land Moving Pictures Book in 1909.” (Bob Kevoian, 41:57)
  • Personal stories include parents saving up cereal prizes as Christmas gifts—a comic-sad highlight.
    • “She broke the Geneva Convention of cereal box toys… digging the toys out to put in our stockings.” (Josh Arnold, 48:12)

8. Sports & Traffic Mishaps

Timestamps: 62:29–71:06

• Coverage of baseball updates (e.g., minor league team name changes), DUI stories linked to boating, and confusion at highway exits.
  • “San Juan, Puerto Rico, Houston, Texas, Tokyo, Japan, and Miami, Florida. And right now, Chechnya and Korea are playing!” (Tom Griswold, 61:56)
  • “You can be arrested for a DUI on a boat.” (Tom Griswold, 71:52)

9. Comedian Kelly Collette Joins the Show

Timestamps: 77:02–147:28

• Kelly discusses comedic persona choices, the use of fake names, personal background, her work history with the Cincinnati Reds, and adopting senior dogs.
• Holds her own among the crew’s jabs and reveries about dating as a comedian, the oddities of touring life, and hilarious stories about her mascot days.
  • “I was on the rally pack—people that shoot the T-shirts off the dugouts. I was the mascot twice when Rosie Red was first introduced.” (Kelly Collette, 90:46)
  • “I teach stand-up comedy and my boyfriend’s taking my class—probably have to break up afterwards!” (Kelly Collette, 99:01)

10. Al Jackson's "Street Lingo" Segment

Timestamps: 114:44–129:21

• Al quizzes Tom on modern slang and “street lingo” with much laughter at the generational divide.
  • Example: “What’s a baddie?” (Al Jackson, 124:50)
  • Tom’s confused attempts: “A woman of easy virtue? Round-heeled?” (Tom Griswold, 124:59)

11. Relationship Advice – "Sexy Time" with Ali Breen

Timestamps: 131:48–142:18

• Ali addresses letters on risqué sexual preferences, friendship dilemmas over infidelity, and hand-holding protocols.
  • “My boyfriend asked me to pee on him… Now we've done it four times—how freaky is this gonna get?” (Letter read by Ali, 132:08)
  • “If you're uncomfortable, move on. If not, this is just his thing.” (Josh Arnold, 132:31)
  • "I'd rather pee on a guy than hold his hand. You know what I mean?" (Kelly Collette, 136:30)

12. Weird App Alert: 'Him Plant' Penis Visualization

Timestamps: 139:09–141:47

• Christy brings an “only in 2026 (and the Bob & Tom Show)” news item: an app that lets men see an AI visual of what their penis will look like after enhancement surgery.
  • “There’s a new app from Him Plant that lets you upload images of your ween and see how it would look after enhancements.” (Christy Lee, 139:14)
  • “It’s like a glamour shot… Could you see if they put that in the mall?” (Christy, Bob, and Tom riff, 141:20)

13. History, Odd Inventions, and Spirals into Nostalgia

Timestamps: 106:58–113:59

• Fun segments on historical events, the inventors of the cup noodle (Momofuku Ando) and the hula hoop, plus the strange legacy of the Lone Ranger atomic bomb ring.
  • “The Lone Ranger atomic a-bomb ring—on top is a spinning atomic bomb… why did the Lone Ranger have that?” (Bob Kevoian, 54:18)

14. Miscellaneous Highlights, Running Jokes, and Wrap-up

Timestamps: Throughout

• Frequent callbacks to Bob’s pill caddy (“I have a Batman pill caddy—checkmate!”), comparisons of hand sizes, and playful speculation about how animals or objects would look as breakfast cereal mascots.
• The gang riffs on mundane victories (pills not getting stuck, successful fast-food drive-throughs) and minor disasters (flipping desks at Catholic school, bowling ball thefts).

Memorable Quotes

• "Cornflakes was invented by a guy that… had an anti-masturbation campaign." — Tom Griswold (06:40)
• "She broke the Geneva Convention of cereal box toys..." — Josh Arnold (48:12)
• "I'd rather pee on a guy than hold his hand." — Kelly Collette (136:30)
• "It's like a glamour shot for your penis!" — Bob Kevoian riffing on the 'Him Plant' app (141:20)
• "She loves my sleep number bed. There are two dog beds in my bedroom and yet he did not want to be in one of them. By the way, in the other dog bed was my daughter—heart. I wish I was kidding." — Bob Kevoian (15:37)
• On cereal box toys: “My mom would dig the toys out and put them in our stockings…things I bought myself. Her heart was in the right place.” — Josh Arnold (48:12)
• "Captain Crunch's insignia is not that of a captain! But on the vessel he's the captain so it counts—Star Trek rules." — Tom Griswold & Bob Kevoian (11:34)

Timestamps for Major Segments

| Segment | Start | End | |-----------------------------------------------|-------|-------| | VIP/Tech Announcements | 00:00 | 00:36 | | Godwin's "Drinking Song" | 00:58 | 03:44 | | Cereal Comedy & Trivia | 04:00 | 12:44 | | Listener Letters & Life Routines | 13:20 | 16:47 | | Trapeze Urban Legend & Song Parody | 27:13 | 28:18 | | Cereal Box Prizes/Childhood Nostalgia | 41:28 | 47:18 | | Traffic Mishaps/Sports Mix | 62:29 | 71:06 | | Kelly Collette Introduced | 77:02 | 147:28 | | Al Jackson’s Lingo Lessons | 114:44| 129:21| | Sexy Time with Ali Breen | 131:48| 142:18| | Weird App News ('Him Plant') | 139:09| 141:47| | History, Inventions, Weird Collectibles | 106:58| 113:59|

Episode Tone & Language

The show maintains its signature irreverent, conversational tone, marked by snark, puns, and quick-witted absurdity. The hosts speak directly and familiarly, often trading jabs or riffing on each others’ stories and jokes. Serious moments and news stories are quickly mined for comic relief and social commentary, especially on everyday foibles and American culture.

Useful for Listeners Who Missed It:

• This episode is a classic BOB & TOM blend: wild musical numbers, everyday mishaps, copious cereal/family nostalgia, running inside jokes, and recurring host quirks (pill caddies, pets in beds, fast-food mishaps).
• Highlights include the playful deep-dive into childhood breakfast rituals and cereal box toys, candid relationship advice, and cameo appearances from Kelly Collette and Al Jackson.
• For fans, the comic consistency, abundant callbacks, and comfort-food topics make it a quintessential installment—particularly if you fondly remember sticker prizes, Grape Nuts, and the thrill of the last drop of milk.

The BOB & TOM Show continues to turn everyday oddities into comedy gold, with a crew that can make even vitamin schedules and bowling thefts feel like the funniest stories in America.