Podcast Summary: AMY: The Truth About ‘Let Them’: A Mel Robbins Deep Dive

Podcast Information:

• Title: The Bobby Bones Show
• Host/Author: Premiere Networks
• Episode: AMY: The Truth About ‘Let Them’: A Mel Robbins Deep Dive
• Release Date: July 27, 2025

Introduction

In this episode of The Bobby Bones Show, hosts Amy and Kat engage in a deep and introspective conversation about Mel Robbins, a prominent self-help author and life coach. The discussion revolves around Mel Robbins' popular "Let Them" theory, exploring its effectiveness, origins, and the controversies that have arisen surrounding it. This episode serves as a critical analysis aimed at helping listeners discern whom they can trust in the realm of self-help and personal development.

Personal Disillusionment with Mel Robbins

Amy begins by expressing her growing skepticism and disappointment with Mel Robbins, whom she once considered a trusted figure in self-help. She shares her struggle with reconciling her admiration for Mel Robbins with emerging controversies.

Amy (02:11): "I already feel like I've had to let go of Jay Shetty and now Mel Robbins. So I need to know who we can trust."

Introducing the Deep Dive

Kat introduces the concept of their "deep dive" series, where they critically examine influential figures and ideas to educate themselves and their listeners.

Kat (02:34): "It's our first official deep dive. So this is something we'll do from time to time."

Background on Mel Robbins

The hosts delve into Mel Robbins' background, highlighting her academic achievements and career transition. Mel Robbins, a Dartmouth and Boston College Law School alumnus, shifted from being a public defender to a life coach after seeking guidance from a life coach herself.

Kat (17:00): "She went to Dartmouth. She's a lawyer... she trained for two years under this person by phone, email, and in-person visits occasionally."

The Origin of "Let Them" Theory

Amy recounts how she first encountered the "Let Them" theory through a viral video by Mel Robbins, where Mel encourages individuals to let go of negative influences without overanalyzing or confronting unnecessarily.

Amy (34:26): "I just heard about this idea or theory called Let them... just let them and move on with your day."

Criticism of the "Let Them" Theory

The discussion shifts to the critiques of the "Let Them" theory. Kat references an Instagram account, Therapy for Women, which outlines several criticisms:

1. Excuse for Avoidance: The theory can be misused to escape necessary conversations and compromise in relationships.

2. One-Size-Fits-All Approach: Treating complex personal issues with a simplistic solution can lead individuals to feel inadequate if the method doesn't work for them.

3. Shame and Failure: If "Let Them" doesn't yield results, individuals may feel shame or believe there's something inherently wrong with them.

4. Ignoring Root Causes: The theory fails to address deeper issues such as abuse or trauma, making it ineffective in serious situations.

5. Plagiarism Concerns: "Let Them" appears to be derived from Cassie Phillips' poem of the same name, raising questions about originality and proper attribution.

Kat (42:16): "The Let them theory is somewhat like radical acceptance too, which we've talked about on here, which is part of dbt, which is a part of a therapy that's already been created."

Plagiarism Controversy

A significant portion of the conversation focuses on the alleged plagiarism involved in Mel Robbins' "Let Them" theory. Amy and Kat uncover a timeline suggesting that Mel Robbins may have appropriated Cassie Phillips' work without proper credit. They highlight discrepancies between Mel's book narrative and the timeline of Cassie's original poem.

Kat (54:30): "So in 2019, Cassie Phillips writes the poem Let Them... In May 13, 2023, Mel Robbins makes viral TikTok sharing the discovery of Let them... In December 2024, she publishes the book the Let Them Theory."

Amy shares her personal disappointment upon discovering this overlap, which led her to stop supporting Mel Robbins' work altogether.

Amy (53:07): "This entire scenario was the downfall of my relationship with Mel. ... I couldn't finish it. Which then those articles and podcasts led me into more research and then now I'm just Disenchanted."

Impact on Personal Trust and Discernment

The hosts discuss the broader implications of such controversies on personal trust and the importance of critical thinking when following self-help gurus. They emphasize the necessity of evaluating the authenticity and ethical standards of influential figures.

Kat (73:21): "You are allowed to change your mind at any point. ... You can change your mind about how you feel about them."

Guidelines for Trustworthy Influencers

To aid listeners in navigating similar situations, Amy and Kat propose a set of questions to assess the credibility and trustworthiness of self-help figures:

1. Is it too good to be true?
2. Do their actions match their words?
3. How do they handle critique and accountability?
4. Do they show humility or just authority?
5. What do they gain from your trust? Are they guiding, helping, or just selling?

Kat (69:00): "Five questions... One, is it too good to be true? Two, do their actions match their words?... Five, what do they gain from your trust?"

Conclusion and Takeaways

Amy and Kat wrap up the episode by reaffirming the importance of personal agency and discernment in choosing whom to trust and follow. They encourage listeners to critically evaluate the information and the influencers they engage with, ensuring that their personal growth is supported by authentic and ethical guidance.

Amy (73:43): "Because if I'm going to be watching somebody's videos or reading their books... Let them, let us."

Notable Quotes:

• Amy (02:11): "I already feel like I've had to let go of Jay Shetty and now Mel Robbins. So I need to know who we can trust."

• Kat (03:00): "I was the biggest Mel Robbins fan... I just couldn't finish the book."

• Kat (33:35): "The Let them theory is somewhat like radical acceptance too... which is a part of a therapy that's already been created."

• Amy (53:07): "This entire scenario was the downfall of my relationship with Mel... I couldn't finish it."

• Kat (73:21): "You are allowed to change your mind at any point."

• Amy (73:43): "Because if I'm going to be watching somebody's videos or reading their books... Let them, let us."

This episode serves as a reflective and critical exploration of Mel Robbins' influence in the self-help space, urging listeners to engage with such content thoughtfully and ethically.