
Loading summary
Ray
This is an iHeart podcast.
Lunchbox
Guaranteed Human.
Cal Penn
I turned off news altogether.
Lunchbox
I hate to say it, but I don't trust much of anything.
Ray
It's the rage bait.
Lunchbox
It feels like it's trying to divide people. We got clear facts. Maybe we could calm down a little. NBC News brings you clear reporting. Let's meet at the Facts. Let's move forward from there. NBC News reporting for America.
Ray
When you own your own business, you
Lunchbox
need to keep things moving. Need to book a last minute flight? Earn a $300 travel credit to cover that. Need to take a meeting before takeoff? Do it from the comfort of the Chase Sapphire lounge by the club.
Ray
Need to catch your breath before you board?
Lunchbox
Done. Chase Sapphire reserved for business. The business card that gives back all you put in. Visit chase.com ReserveBusiness to learn more.
Ray
Cards issued by JPMorgan Chase Bank.
Lunchbox
Any member FDIC subject to credit approval terms. Appl.
Ray
This is Tab Ramos from inside American Soccer. And this summer, topgolf is turning into the ultimate soccer destination. They've got a new soccer themed game you can play with your group. Exclusive food and drink items. They've even installed full size soccer goals so you can try to hit golf
Lunchbox
balls right into the net.
Ray
And every match all summer long will be on throughout the venue. And if you want to keep the fun going all summer, you can get the topgolf Summer Fun Pass which lets you play every single day and bring up to five guests every visit. Get yours now@TopGolf.com FunPass if you're feeling
Cal Penn
off fatigue, mood changes, skin shifts, yet your labs say everything's normal. You're not alone. Meet Oestra from Inner Balance, the first all in one prescription strength bioidentical hormone cream that's natural and effective and only takes one drop, 10 seconds a day. Oestro replaces five to six products women typically use to treat symptoms and is third party tested to ensure the highest quality. Visit innerbalance.com today to start feeling like yourself again. That's innerbalance.com Good morning, man.
Lunchbox
It is. It is here. It is a morning. Is it good? Yeah. Was it a rough night of sleep? Yeah. Am I doing okay? Yeah. Am I ready to start the show? Yeah. Did I do a lot of things this weekend? Yeah. Do I have stories to tell? Yeah.
Ray
We are 201 days away from the sore losers convention in Nashville. Tenon brought to you by Freeland Chevrolet. Guys, go get an oil change, get your axles fixed, get your tire rods handled. I'm dealing with them right now. Guys. They said the trailblazers in bad shape. Oh no, I'm not just saying their name on this potty to say it. I am in conversation and text with Kevin Richard Lewis.
Lunchbox
I said, even Lewis is on the text.
Ray
Yes. I said fix her. I don't care the cost.
Lunchbox
Oh man, that's crazy.
Ray
It's been like two weeks though.
Lunchbox
That, that's right. Well that means they're, they're really trying to figure out exactly what's wrong. It means there's a lot wrong.
Ray
But no, no, I don't even think they've started. They're waiting for approve everything that needs to be done. Oh, we're talking thousands of dollars.
Lunchbox
Are we really?
Ray
Yes.
Lunchbox
That's not good.
Ray
And so I'm slow playing it because I got the rental smart. I'm like still discussing with the wife. Then I get another text from Kevin, hey man, how are the discussions?
Lunchbox
And then Lewis is like, hey man, just listen to pods that you're kind of stretching. No, no, no, I meant like stretching for content. You know, I was stretching my legs out, man.
Ray
Got a brand new rental, 35 miles on it.
Lunchbox
That's pretty nice. And guys, tickets, general tickets for the convention do go on sale July 1st. July 1st you will be able to start your tickets, the payment plans, everything will be available July 1st. The add ons, the extra events that'll be later in the month July 15th. Because you gotta wait for the Preds schedule to come out. So hopefully we have a Preds game Saturday night. But man, it is rocking.
Ray
You sound like all these country artists. General ticket on sale. Okay guys, pre sale for pre sale club owners for Russell Dickerson party or fan club. You get to get two days earlier.
Lunchbox
I'm sorry, I'm trying to, you know, get in the CMA fest. It's been going on all week and so it's kind of in my blood. Everybody advertising this, advertising that. Come to my show here, come to my show there. Some guy at the pool this weekend came up to me. He's like, dude, dude, I've been meaning to ask you two years in a row to get me into John Brown's show. I keep forgetting I saw he was gonna be in Nashville. It was a 30 minute set down at some bar, Luke Holmes's bar. I wanted, I really wanted to go see him. Ah. And I was like, well you should have told me, man. He's like, no, no, it's probably too late. It's, it's later today. I'm like, well yeah, you should just let me know in advance, man. He Goes. I will next time. Just. I felt like 30 minutes. You know, maybe it's not worth it to use my hookup to get in.
Ray
What hookup do you have?
Lunchbox
When did I say I'd hook you up? I'm just saying nice things right now in front of you. And then when you actually ask me, I'm back. Oh, man. I can't really help you.
Ray
John Brown.
Lunchbox
I don't really know the guy's name.
Ray
Ray's the next Wallen.
Lunchbox
Nah. If you look up whoever played it, Luke Combs is on Friday. It was one of those people.
Ray
Waka flocka.
Lunchbox
No, Ray, the guy that has the
Ray
microphone that auto tunes. Why don't you just jump in?
Lunchbox
So that's T pain.
Ray
No. Russell Dickerson did some show with a guy who has auto tune. Oh, what's your body?
Lunchbox
No, no, not sure. Okay.
Ray
Fetty Wap came to Nissan.
Lunchbox
All right, that sounds good. You go.
Ray
No. And it ended early. When I came through at midnight, there was no fireworks. Stadium was closed down.
Lunchbox
Wow.
Ray
Yeah. There was no traffic, guys. Did a headliner not show up because they might have been in bed by 10 on Sunday night?
Lunchbox
That's interesting.
Ray
All right, we're going to do live. We are the 1, 2, 3.
Lunchbox
So losers. What up, everybody? I am Lunchbox. I know the most about sports. So I'll give you the sports facts, my sports opinions because I'm pretty much a sports genius, y'. All.
Ray
It's Sizzin. I'm from the north. I'm an alpha male. I live on the north side of Nashville with bays are in the country, 2.3 acres, two kids at Vanderbilt defrosting. Justin's supposed to be looking at him. He lives in Michigan. Moment of silence for him. Christian Yelich did not get a hit on Friday night. Justin fell from 12 to 0 on beat the Streak. And he also lost his golden condom, which is what saves you in the 10 to 15 range. So he is. He's now at 2. He's in rebuilding mode. And I told him it takes a big man to come on that Saturday and pick two guys after falling that far.
Lunchbox
Yeah. No, really, because you have zero, so you have nothing to lose. So it takes no guts whatsoever.
Ray
We were saying it about this low tank guy. Last season he got to 50. Oh, and this how psycho the guy is. The next day he picked two people. He dropped from 50 to zero, and the psychopath picked two guys.
Lunchbox
There's no psychopath about it. Once you get eliminated, you have. You have to pick two because you have zero.
Ray
He was essentially three days away from 5.6 million. And this insane psycho murderer woke up the next day and picked two players. Well, that's crazy.
Lunchbox
You have to get back on the horse. It's sort of like when you're hungover and you chug a beer because you want the hangover to go away. It's hair of the dog. You can't run away and be scared. You have to fight.
Ray
But going into the website shaking, oh, that would be seeing 0 after seeing 50 and how close you were, that has to just bring the darkest, most terrifying memories. To go back to that website that burned you, I mean, it was. It was a scorned woman.
Lunchbox
I kind of understand that now. I. That angle, I understand. When you go to the website, it brings up some trepidation, some fear, some ray health hath.
Ray
No. Furry like a.
Lunchbox
A woman's scorn, an uneasy feeling and all that stuff. But yeah, I mean, once you're out, you might as well pick two.
Ray
A moment of silence for Justin.
Lunchbox
Great. So did he get back on the horse? And he get two hits on Saturday?
Ray
He picked Cheerio. And Cheerio didn't hit all weekend until Yesterday. Went like 3 for 6, but yes, he got 2. We all hammered the Rockies all weekend. Finally, the Brewers, I believe, is who they're playing. Yeah, Cheerio. They put up like 50 hits, so we all scored last night.
Lunchbox
Good. Good, man. I'm glad. And what else do you do this weekend, man?
Ray
Pool time. We put out the above ground pool.
Lunchbox
Oh, your little inflatable pool?
Ray
Yes. And we did learn that you can't have a 10 foot deep pool. Why can't you?
Lunchbox
Because you have to dig 12ft into the ground.
Ray
No, but why couldn't we just go on Amazon and buy a 10ft deep pool?
Lunchbox
How would you get in it?
Ray
Not the reason. There's a legal reason why kids could come in and drown and you'd go to jail. You have to have a fence around it. We don't have a fence.
Lunchbox
Oh, so the only thing you don't have. Oh, I see what you're saying. Neighborhood kids.
Ray
Yeah. So the only thing we can have is a dog pool. So we were in the dog pool all weekend. It's like, legally, it's a foot above the ground, and so we don't have to have a fence for that. But you don't need an ocean. You don't need the Atlantic, the Pacific, the Cumberland. All you need is a floaty, a flotation device, and you're on some sort of water Eases the whole body. You close the eyes, you don't even know you're in a dog pool in your backyard in the country.
Lunchbox
Wow. Okay. And so you and BAE just laid in this foot of water.
Ray
It's pretty big. We can both do it at the same time. And we played music. We brought the TV out. We were watching tv. But now I got to wonder, are we draining it every time? Because isn't that water just going to get really hot?
Lunchbox
It's going to get really hot and slimy. Like when you have one of those baby pools and you leave it out for a couple of days, the water is straight slimy. I don't know. I wish I understood why it's slimy, but it 100% is slimy. I don't know what it is. It's gross.
Ray
Well, Bazer bought. I'm one step ahead of you. She bought a pool cover. So we have a dog pool and then probably a hundred dollar pool cover. But that's my question to you. Underneath the pool cover, isn't it just going to be straight slime?
Lunchbox
I think it is.
Ray
That water, they, like dive in and they have like a layer of green slime on their sunglasses. John, Maybe go in the bathroom, wash off your sunnies.
Lunchbox
I don't know.
Ray
It was a weird leaf in there or something. Looked like algae.
Lunchbox
Hold on. No, no. If you have friends over, they are 100% not coming and getting in that pool.
Ray
We invited Heather and her daughter last summer and they loved it.
Lunchbox
That's the weirdest thing I've ever heard.
Ray
I'll show you the picture. It was three women in the pool, and I was up on the patio watching tv.
Lunchbox
We can fit. We can.
Ray
Four's pushing it, but you can do three in it.
Lunchbox
That's hilarious.
Ray
Well, we did something even more funny, but I got to figure out if we're gonna talk about it on the big show.
Lunchbox
Well, we. Speaking of pool, we went to the pool on Friday. You know, we, we. We talked to the neighbors. We're like, hey, Friday, pool shutdown. Like, we are in. I said, should we text the other neighbors? They said they're in also. So three sets of neighbors going to the pool on a Friday night. And so we made dinner at home. We. You go to Trader Joe's. They got this chicken fried rice the kids absolutely love.
Ray
You can take that to the pool.
Lunchbox
Dude, you do whatever you want, Ray.
Ray
It's the wild west out there.
Lunchbox
It is the wild, wild west out there.
Ray
Kind of like MSG tonight, Ray. They shut down the watch party Trump's there.
Lunchbox
We cook the chicken fried rice and what you do is you add like three or four extra eggs.
Ray
Yes. It's awesome.
Lunchbox
To get some more protein in there for the kids. And we threw half a bag of extra peas in there, half a bag of shredded carrots, extra into there and we mixed it all around and we got grapes, strawberries, we had little ice cream cones, mini drumsticks.
Ray
Hopefully this isn't all going in the same thing. Now you're talking about separate stuff.
Lunchbox
No, no, separate stuff. You got them in the cooler. The wife brought a bottle of wine and dude, you, it was amazing.
Ray
You can pull out a bottle of wine at this place.
Lunchbox
Well, you keep it in the cooler and then you just pour it in a cup and put it back in. Yeah, you don't have it sitting on your a table or a chair at the pool.
Ray
Don't want to draw attention.
Lunchbox
Correct. But the neighbor, he brought his cooler in his little shoulder cooler with a sixer in there.
Ray
Geez, I mean, what if a legislator came by? There's no way they don't shut this bull down.
Lunchbox
It'd probably be shut down.
Ray
That's what I'm saying.
Lunchbox
But here's the thing. The lifeguards are 18 year old to 20 year old kids that don't give a crap.
Ray
And you got people sitting there making drinks with a shaker.
Lunchbox
They. Well, I haven't seen a shaker, but cutting limes. We were, I mean it was just, it was there. We were just there and we have dinner and the other neighbor, they brought a pasta salad with tomatoes and cheese and some other stuff in there, maybe some olives, I don't know. And we just had a little feast right there at the pool.
Ray
So is it meet up before you guys all just have a time?
Lunchbox
You go, no, no. We talked earlier and we're like, all right, we're going to be there about 4:30. All right, see there? 4:30, see 4:30 and the pool closes at 8. We are there for three and a half hours just swimming like fish.
Ray
That's clutch and are you in the water?
Lunchbox
Well, that's the thing, Ram. A land animal. I've been trying to avoid the water the first few weeks because it's usually pretty cold. And I got in like last week sometime, I don't know, Thursday maybe, and it was freezing cold.
Ray
The dog pool was as well.
Lunchbox
But here's the problem. I got on, got in last week for the first time. And I mean I'm in there for max 45 seconds. And I have five kids climbing up my back. And I'm like, what are we doing?
Ray
The tree. You always got to go for the water tree.
Lunchbox
Oh. I was like, do I look like a place game? He's a playscape. He's a playscape. So all these kids, some that aren't even in my family, obviously, because I only have three.
Ray
Marcus, please don't.
Lunchbox
They just start climbing on me.
Ray
Girls.
Lunchbox
Two girls. My three boys. Then here comes another girl. It's like, what? Whoa. Guys, we've got to stop this.
Ray
Yeah, I mean, that's. We were doing ring dive last summer, Heather's kid girl.
Lunchbox
And I'm like
Ray
a little too tight in there and cramp for ring dive with a 40 year old and a 8 year old.
Lunchbox
Yeah. Little. A little weird that you do a ring dive in a one foot pool. I mean, that's really interesting in its own right. So I'm like, all right, guys. And then the break comes because at the end of every hour, there's 10 minutes of just adult swim.
Ray
Whoa, pause.
Lunchbox
Yeah.
Ray
What happens then?
Lunchbox
Well, the adults have the pool to themselves.
Ray
That's hot.
Lunchbox
Not really.
Ray
What are people doing?
Lunchbox
Some people are swimming laps. Some are just like on those big noodles and just floating in the water. I mean, nothing happens. There's still a lifeguard on duty.
Ray
Okay, but I mean, it being called adult time Adult swim. That sounds sexual.
Lunchbox
It could be, but. Oh, John, what the hell? So I. That was last, and then Friday I was like, all right, I'll get in the water. I get in the water a little bit. Then baby box three wants to jump off the diving board.
Ray
There's a diving board?
Lunchbox
Yeah. And so he tried it last week and he got up there with his floaty. Because last summer. No problem. Jumped off with his floaty. No one said anything. Well, last week he got whistled. And they're like. He's like, what? He's. No, no. No life jackets. No life jackets off the diving board. And you want to. You want to embarrass a four year old in front of the whole pool. That's how you do it. That is how you put a four year old in their place in front of the whole pool. So he gets off the diving board and he's bawling, what did I do wrong? What did I do wrong? What did I do right? Crying. I'm like, bud, I'm so sorry. I don't know. It must be a new rule. We can go ask him. I don't want to ask him. Meltdown for 30 minutes. So then on Friday, he's like, dad, dad, can you get in the water and catch me so I can jump off the diving board? Here's the thing. Your boy is not that great of a swimmer. I can doggy paddle a little bit, but luckily, one of the neighbors had one of those big noodles. You know, the talking about the big noodles you see at Costco.
Ray
Lily Pad Noodle?
Lunchbox
Nah, it's like. It's. It's bigger than the styrofoam one, but it's, like, at least two to three times bigger than the styrofoam one. It's kind of like a rubbery, fake plastic, very flexible. So I was like, all right. So I got their little noodle, and I just sit there at the diving board, and he'd jump in, and then he'd grab onto it, and I'd swim him to the side and get out. I'd swim back over, he'd jump off the diving board, grab the noodle, swim to the side. I did that for an hour and a half, man.
Ray
But see, that's pretty chill. At least you have a job, a responsibility. Instead of you just like, where do I put my hands? You know, if the kids are all playing with each other, as a dad, you kind of want them to need you to do something.
Lunchbox
Some of the time is nice, but just the constant. Jump off the diving board, me, swim to the side, go. Swim back out. Jump off the diamond board, me, swim to the side, swim back. I got no relaxation.
Ray
Right, but would you rather have done that or done. When we were in Miami last summer, and the. They were doing a talent diving competition, and the dad was having to rate for 45 minutes which kid had a better dive?
Lunchbox
You don't think we rated cannonballs?
Ray
See, it's just. And the guy's like, well, you had good toad. I mean, there was literally no difference in any of the dives. And dad had to rate them two girls for 45 minutes.
Lunchbox
Dude, that's a girl dad. Oh, we did that. We? My two older ones. Dad, dad, I'm gonna do a cannonball. Rate it, rate it. Okay. Jump. Boom.
Ray
Okay, so it crosses over. But anyways, I'm saying I would prefer to be the lifeguard. Dad, you're at least active a little bit. Instead of raiding girls diving into the water as a girl Dad, I. I'll take yours.
Lunchbox
You know, it was fine, but just an hour and a half. Constant, constant.
Ray
I couldn't handle being a girl dad.
Lunchbox
So then we eat dinner, and it's like, all right, let's get back in. And what's the little ones like? Dad, dad, can I jump off the diving board? I'm like, oh, my gosh.
Ray
Are any of the other parents involved or they boozing? I mean, by now, the wine's half polished off. The sixers now down to one left.
Lunchbox
The guy with the six, or he was in there with, you know, a little bit.
Ray
A little sloppy.
Lunchbox
He was doing some jumps off the diving board. He was doing cannonballs, Frank.
Ray
That's for the kids.
Lunchbox
But then. Then I got into it with a guy on the side of the pool. So he's sitting there with his feet in the pool, right? His legs are hanging over. He's sitting. So knees are at the, you know, concrete. And then his shins and stuff are
Ray
in the pool, probably soaking the bunions.
Lunchbox
Soaking the bunions. Trying to get a splinter out of the bottom of his foot. I don't know what he's doing.
Ray
Plantar fasciitis. Add some ice, you'll be good in a day.
Lunchbox
But baby box three is on that little noodle. And he's practicing his kick in. He's kind of kicking over to the wall. And he's right by the ladder, and he's still kicking. Whack, whack, whack. Splashing. And the guy goes, hey, bro. Hey, bro, you're getting me all wet.
Ray
Oh, you gotta love the community pool.
Lunchbox
And I'm like, what? He goes, yeah, man, your son's kicking and getting me all wet. I said, it's a pool, man. What's he supposed to do?
Ray
You fired back with that.
Lunchbox
Yeah, he's learning to swim.
Ray
Awkward turtle.
Lunchbox
And he says, yeah, can you do it over there where you're not getting us all wet? And I. I looked left, I looked right, and I said, the last time I checked, you're sitting with your feet in the water. So if you don't want to get wet, go sit in the chairs.
Ray
Secondhand embarrassment.
Lunchbox
But am I crazy? Like, why is he mad that he's getting splashed when he's sitting with his feet in the pool? Like, you're on the edge of the pool. So is there a no splash zone right there? You're not supposed to. Kids and people aren't supposed to jump in the water or swim by you. You melt, go sit over there. And he goes, no, I'm good right here. Soak in my feet. But I'd appreciate no splashing.
Ray
Yeah, I'd appreciate you too, Ped.
Lunchbox
And then my kid got out, walked to the diving board jumped back in and that was where we left it.
Ray
Yeah. We'll pick back up on Friday. Take a break.
Lunchbox
Yeah. Hey. Hey, man. No splash in here. Idiot. That was Friday night at the Bull. We'll take a break. We'll be right back. Hey, everyone, it's Cal Penn, host of Earsay, the Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club. This week on the podcast, I'm sitting down with Divergent author Veronica Roth to talk about her sprawling new novel, Seek the Traitor's Son. It's a sci fi fantasy epic about two protagonists on opposite sides of a war and a prophecy neither of them wanted.
Cal Penn
My first book was Divergent, and when that came out, like, because it was so popular, I think it attracted, like, mostly positivity, but the negativity I sucked in like a sponge. And I think it was like, critiques of things I liked when I was like, you know, I was 23 and I wrote this book and it had all my, like, dorky little cheesy or maybe unrealistic loves in it. And I started to feel a lot of shame about those things. And so for the rest of my career, I steered away from those little things that, like, make you feel pleasure when you read. But I also was, like, saying no to these parts of myself that I then was like, screw it.
Ray
So that's this.
Lunchbox
Listen to Earsay, the Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club on the iHeartradio app or wherever you get your podcasts.
Cal Penn
If you're feeling off fatigue, mood changes, skin shifts, yet your lab say everything's normal. You're not alone. Meet Oestra from Inner Balance. The first all in one prescription strength bioidentical hormone cream that's natural and effective and only takes one drop, 10 seconds a day. Oestra replaces five to six products women typically use to treat symptoms and is third party tested to ensure the highest quality. Visit innerbalance.com today to start feeling like yourself again. That's innerbalance.com Ryan Reynolds here from IT Mobile.
Lunchbox
I don't know if you knew this, but anyone can get the same Premium Wireless for $15 a month plan that I've been enjoying. It's not just for celebrities. So do like I did and have
Ray
one of your assistant's assistants switch you
Lunchbox
to Mint Mobile today. I'm told it's super easy to do.
Cal Penn
@mintmobile.com Switch upfront payment of $45 for 3 month plan equivalent to $15 per month Required intro rate first 3 months only, then full price plan options available, taxes and fees extra. See full terms@mintmobile.com. i turned off news altogether.
Lunchbox
I hate to say it, but I don't trust much of anything.
Ray
It's the rage bait.
Lunchbox
It feels like it's trying to divide people. We got clear facts. Maybe we can calm down a little. NBC News brings you clear reporting. Let's meet at the facts. Let's move forward from there. NBC News reporting for America.
Ray
At some point, you gotta talk about your game, dude.
Lunchbox
I will talk about my game. Yesterday I made. I made an executive decision, man. I decided, how can I get out to the golf course on a weekend, fake a kidnapping? How can I go to the golf course more often? And it be like, oh, my gosh, that is so awesome. You should go to the golf course more. And I looked at my wife the other day, and I said, you know what? I'm gonna take one of the boys golf. It's Sunday. She goes, what? I said, yeah. Baby box has never played golf. He's never been to the golf course. I'm going to take him to the golf course on Sunday.
Ray
What a time to start the busiest day. I'm sure the course loved you.
Lunchbox
Well, he wasn't officially on the tee time.
Ray
True. Pulls a baser. Just does a couple swings here, does
Lunchbox
a couple swings, does a couple swings here, swings there. And so I said, I'm going to take him on Sunday, and I'll take Baby Box 2 on Thursday. And because Baby Box 1 has baseball practice on Thursday, so that'd just be a long day.
Ray
Irrelevant.
Lunchbox
No, it. No, it's relevant.
Ray
Erroneous.
Lunchbox
So Saturday night, we get back from the pool, because we went to the pool again Saturday night and getting ready, and they get all their dry clothes on. They shower for the first time in probably two weeks. And I tell baby box two, because you got to tell him first, because he's going to be upset that baby box one is going golfing. So I. Hey, man. Come here, bud. Come here. I was like, I just want to let you know, on Thursday, me and you were going golfing.
Ray
Boom. Set him up with that. And then he finds out the other information.
Lunchbox
Exactly. You set him up with the, oh, my gosh, I'm going golfing. He's already excited, just like the wives.
Ray
You set him up with something good, and then you hit him with the real news.
Lunchbox
Mm. Then you hit him with the bad news. So I said, hey, man, we're gonna. Me and you, we're gonna go golfing on Thursday.
Ray
Honey, I got you flowers. Also, I have an enlarged testicle.
Lunchbox
Hey, honey, here's Some flowers. I lost my job.
Ray
What did I hit Bazer with? I hit her with something. I was. Hey, you can decide whatever you want this weekend. Oh, hey, also, talk to the car guys. I think it's gonna be a couple thousand fixer on the Trailblazer. Oh, but why is it the person's fault? Why is it my fault that my car needed work done?
Lunchbox
It's not. Yeah, but you feel that way. You feel guilty. Okay, so anyway, so he's like, all right, dad, so is that tomorrow? I'm like, no, no, tomorrow's Sunday. And he goes, all right. Is it the day after that? I'm like, no. And he goes, all right, dad, you just tell me when it is. You just tell me when Thursday is.
Ray
Your dad doesn't keep a calendar.
Lunchbox
I'm like, all right, but I will. And then I say, hey, baby box one. Baby box one, can you come in here for a minute? I was like, hey, bud. Tomorrow morning, me and you, we're headed to the golf course. What?
Ray
What?
Lunchbox
Can I drive the golf cart? Can I drive the golf cart? Oh, my gosh. I can't wait. I can't wait. So wake up Sunday morning, our tee time's at 8am about a couple miles from your house.
Ray
Oh, thanks. You could have stopped by for some brunch.
Lunchbox
I thought about it.
Ray
We were home. Actually, we weren't.
Lunchbox
Oh.
Ray
We left at, like, 9am we went to TJ Maxx.
Lunchbox
See, you had to do your Max and Easter stuff. So we roll up to the golf course, and I got his little bag with, like, four clubs, and it couldn't find his putter. Don't know where the. What the kids did with it. Who knows? Somewhere in the grass, in the trees. Who knows where it is? And we roll up to the golf course, we go inside, we check in, and we go through that. We had gone through the McDonald's, drive through, got some breakfast on the way. And I said, hey, man, can I get a small bucket of balls? So we go to the driving range, and he's just whacking balls. Whack, whack, whack, whack. Having the time of his life.
Ray
This is how Tiger's dad felt. Where's my Winnebago?
Lunchbox
And I said, son, I'll be right back. I'm gonna be in the car for a little bit.
Ray
Backstory. Tiger's dad allegedly would have women swing by the Winnebago while Tiger was practicing.
Lunchbox
Practicing putting.
Ray
Allegedly.
Lunchbox
According to the documentary. Anyway, so he would just see women
Ray
go in and out of the Winnebago. I wanted to be close to my dad, so I picked up golf and loved it.
Lunchbox
No, I picked up cheating on my wife. Just like my dad, man. I want. I want to relate. I want to bang every woman that walked. So I just want to be like my dad.
Ray
But not the banging part. But how clutch. If you have an RV just pulled up to a golf course.
Lunchbox
Yeah.
Ray
And there's women everywhere, but not even the women. There's golf everywhere. Anytime you want to golf, you just get out of the rv.
Lunchbox
That's a good point.
Ray
Like, would our golf course, the Muni, allow us to pull up in a Winnebago?
Lunchbox
Yeah, but they wouldn't let us keep it there overnight.
Ray
You gotta move it, then.
Lunchbox
Gotta move it. Gotta go to the Walmart parking lot to sleep, man.
Ray
Truckers know about that.
Lunchbox
Now. The. The Lot Lizards know about that also. But we don't have a sound for them. So we get in the cart, we can drive into the first tees. Like, dad, let me drive. Let me drive. Let me drive. I'm like, bud, I don't know if you're allowed to drive. So we can't do it right here. Can't do it by the clubhouse. Gotta wait a minute. We'll get out here. You'll be able to drive smart. So I pull up the first t. Meet the three guys. What's up, man? What's up? What's up? What's up? And I was like. I was like, hey, say hi to him. He's like, hi. Okay. And the guys I played with, they were. They were nice. They were friendly, but they weren't very talkative. They were not. They. They didn't really say much to me. They didn't say much to Baby Box.
Ray
I know the type.
Lunchbox
They were just kind of to themselves. They. They played from the tips. Two of them. Should they have been playing from the tips? Probably not.
Ray
It's a small course, though.
Lunchbox
No, it's the one by Pitts's house.
Ray
Okay.
Lunchbox
Not the one right by your house. Yeah. And so, you know, we're playing, and then finally he's like, can I drive? And I let him drive, and boom. Right into the curb. Oh, my God. Sorry, dad. Sorry, sorry, sorry. It's all right. All right, we're going down the hill. Hey, there's a pond up here. Slow down, slow down. Slow to slow down. A little stressful in the beginning. He's like, sorry, dad. Sorry, sorry. I'm just not good. I like driving it on the grass more.
Ray
Can he fit, though, with his hands and everything, or is he reaching up?
Lunchbox
Oh, no, dude, the golf cart. You don't realize.
Ray
Are you hitting the pedals?
Lunchbox
No. You don't realize how, like, little space there is in a golf cart. And when your 7 year old gets in there and can drive it, no problem. Like, he reaches the pedals and can see over the wheel, no problem. Like, it's not very big. And it was great. And you know what was so fun about having him out there? He played like four holes and I didn't know if those guys were going to mind. And I waited till the back nine to let him hit, like, on the course. Except for, like, if I got a putt and it was within two feet, I was like, here, you putt this one.
Ray
Give me.
Lunchbox
And he would always tell me, dad, you don't make any putts. I make all of them. I'm like, well, yeah, who got it to within two feet? Okay, I did.
Ray
So he was already recognizing some inadequacies in your game.
Lunchbox
Yes, but shortcomings. Ray, let me tell you, the best part of having him out there is he doesn't know what a good golf shot is. So you hit the ball in the air and he's like, dad, that was awesome.
Ray
Same with Bazer and Jessica when we were driving race.
Lunchbox
That was awesome. Same like, I hit the first one, the first hole. I mean, I had a pretty good first hole, actually. No, my drive went right into the long grass. Had to take a drop. Then I hit a six iron. Boom. And then I hit one up on the green. He's like, dad, dad, you're up there. Right by the hole. That is so cool. And he counted. He would count the strokes for you. He'd be like, dad, if you make this, you get a hole in four. It was amazing. And then we pull it to a part three goes. Whoa, dad, it's right there. You could get a hole in one. You could get a hole in one on this one.
Ray
See, I'm shocked he's not grabbing for clubs.
Lunchbox
He wanted to. He's like, dad, let me hit on this one. No, not yet.
Ray
Not yet.
Lunchbox
Then when we got a little bit of space between the group behind us and us, I was like, all right, you can play this one.
Ray
But the other dudes had to have been ready to kill you.
Lunchbox
No, the one thing you don't understand about a seven year old is how fast they play. They just run up and whack it and then they sprint to the ball. They don't even come Back to the cart and drive. They run to the ball.
Ray
So did the guys know, though? Oh, he's just doing a couple shots. Or did they think for a second your son was going to play the.
Lunchbox
The mar. Marshall, on hole number one, said, hey, is Junior playing? I said, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Ray
He'll hit some, though, without paying.
Lunchbox
I. I will let him hit without paying. Don't you worry. I will take advantage of you on this golf course if you don't think right.
Ray
When we make the turn, he's gonna take some shots. You're kidding yourself.
Lunchbox
And, dude, it was so enjoyable. It was so freaking fun.
Ray
There you go.
Lunchbox
He loved driving the golf cartoon. Absolutely. Sent a picture to mom, and she goes, I hope this is staged and he's not really driving the golf cart.
Ray
Yeah, it was a. Yeah.
Lunchbox
Let me tell you. I just said, sit right here while I take a picture. No, he drove that sucker all over the course.
Ray
They never tell you that how AI is going to affect us. My parents think everything's AI.
Lunchbox
I mean, he did one time. The other two carts had come to a stop and he rammed into the back of one of them.
Ray
Of the people that you were playing with did it kind of jar kind of jerked him.
Lunchbox
He's like, oh, oh. And I was like, sorry, bud. You're just giving a love tap, letting them know you're back here.
Ray
God, here's a good chiropractor we know from the show.
Lunchbox
He played. He played one par five the whole way, all the way. Just. I mean, it was great.
Ray
What'd he get?
Lunchbox
I don't know, Ray.
Ray
It was a double snowman.
Lunchbox
I'm not sure exactly what he got, but he played. I mean, number 18 is a par 5. He played the whole thing. Let me see. He hit one, hit two to there. He may have got a nine, which isn't bad.
Ray
I gotta get to a course. We played golf all weekend on the back patio. Oh, I haven't played it a course in six months, dude.
Lunchbox
And I mean, I told you, I shot 109 last week. I played a lot better this week. But, I mean, here he is, dude. Look at him. He's just, boom, driving the cart. There he is. Oh, he's about to tee off. Look at that. That's a par 5.
Ray
Is he wearing basketball shoes?
Lunchbox
Look at that. You see that swing? Bam. Bam.
Ray
I mean, he's wearing red shorts and a yellow shirt.
Lunchbox
Look at that. There we are. Hole number 18, man.
Ray
Coach. Who dressed him, Mickey Mouse?
Lunchbox
He dresses himself, man. It looks Great. Look at these. Look at these hits, man. Whoo. Good warm up swing. Oh, watch this. Oh, yeah. Got a hold of that one.
Ray
He's better than brother.
Lunchbox
Look at this. That's his lucky club. He called it.
Ray
Dude, he's a big old boy.
Lunchbox
Watch this. Boom. He hit in the air.
Ray
I haven't seen him in a minute.
Lunchbox
Dude, that's great.
Ray
His face is filled out.
Lunchbox
Yeah.
Ray
And he.
Lunchbox
And he was beat red by the end.
Ray
Ray's got freckles.
Lunchbox
And then I was like, all right,
Ray
does he have freckles?
Lunchbox
No, no freckles, man. And I said, you ready to stop for a milkshake? He goes, dad, I don't know if I want a milkshake.
Ray
Dad's gonna get one with a grand monier on top.
Lunchbox
And he goes, I think I want a slushie for McDonald's. And I said, hey, bud. Hey, there's a Sonic right up here. Let me tell you something. They have better slushies than McDonald's does. He goes, I don't know, Dad. I had one from McDonald's the other day. It's pretty good. I said, son, are you willing to trust me on this one? And he goes, I don't know. As the McDonald's is approaching, I was like, I need a decision. But he's like, ah. We drive past the McDonald's. I was like, you got to let me know because I got to turn around. He goes, all right, dad, I'm going to trust you on this one. And we rolled into Sonic, dude, and he got a slushy. It was mango peach. And he goes, dad, this is perfect. This is the perfect slushy. He goes, you were right. These are great,
Ray
guys. We're having a dead serious conversation about slushies.
Lunchbox
And then as we drove home, he could barely keep his eyes open. He was so tired.
Ray
It's about a two hour drive in traffic.
Lunchbox
He was so tired, dude. His eyes were heavy. He was exhausted. But, man, I got to take Baby Box to the course, and it was fantastic. And even after the round, he goes, dad, dad, we got to go back to the practice place and hit more balls.
Ray
Dad's got to save up a couple dollars.
Lunchbox
So we had to go back to the driving range and hit more balls.
Ray
When?
Lunchbox
After we finished playing.
Ray
After the round.
Lunchbox
After the round, dude, he wanted to hit more. And those were not batting gloves. Those were gardening gloves that he had on his hand he played with.
Ray
There's a college player that does that.
Lunchbox
It was. It was great, dude. So, yes, that is the trick. To get out to the golf course more. You bring your kid with you. And one of the guys on hole number 16, he goes, does he play baseball? I was like, yeah. He goes, I can tell. He goes. He goes, I got a three and a half year old and I'm hoping one day he's going to want to come to the course with me. That would be awesome.
Ray
At least they're not ballerinas.
Lunchbox
We'll take a break. We'll be right back. Hey, everyone, it's Cal Penn. I'm the host of Earsay, the Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club. This week on the podcast, I am sitting down with Ray Porter, the narrator of Andy Weir's audiobook project Hail Mary Massive sci fi adventure about survival and science and what happens when you wake up alone, very far from Earth. I really had to make a decision because I caught myself getting that frog in my throat and starting to get teary as I'm narrating some of these sections and it's like, okay, yo, yo, yo. Is this indulgent? And I really thought about it. I was like, no, at this point would kind of be betraying the trust the author and the listener have in telling this story if I don't go through it. But there's places in this book that that deeply, emotionally affected me and I left it on the mic. That's great because it served the story. People will say like, oh my God, I cried at the end. It's like, yeah, dude, me too. Listen to Irsay, the Audible and iHeart audiobook club on the iHeartradio app or wherever you get your podcasts.
Cal Penn
If you're feeling off fatigue, mood changes, skin shifts, yet your labs say everything's normal. You're not alone. Meet Oestra from Inner Balance, the first all in one prescription strength bioidentical hormone cream that's natural and effective and only takes one drop, 10 seconds a day. Oester replaces five to six products women typically use to treat symptoms and is third party tested to ensure the highest quality. Visit innerbalance.com today to start feeling like yourself again. That's innerbalance.com a burst pipe, a dead
Ray
water heater, the AC calling it quits.
Lunchbox
Who do you call? Homeserve is an easy way to handle
Ray
unexpected home repairs with plans covering stuff
Lunchbox
basic homeowners insurance usually won't. Instead of scrambling for a contractor, you make one call to get the repair process started. Join the millions of customers who who Trust HomeServe right now. Go to HomeServe.com podcast for 50% less your first year.
Ray
That's HomeServe.com podcast savings compared to renewal price void in Florida.
Cal Penn
I turned off news altogether.
Lunchbox
I hate to say it, but I don't trust much of anything.
Ray
It's the rage bait.
Lunchbox
It feels like it's trying to divide people. We got clear facts. Maybe we could calm down a little. NBC News brings you clear reporting. Let's meet at the Facts. Let's move forward from there. NBC News reporting for America. Oh, man.
Ray
But if they are, there's no problem with that.
Lunchbox
Let me tell you what I suffered from on Friday night.
Ray
I woke up to it. What the hell, bro?
Lunchbox
It's called Heartbreak Hotel. What in the hell? Oh, my gosh.
Ray
I was shocked to wake up to that.
Lunchbox
That was one of the more devastating losses of my San Antonio spurs cheering career. You get the stop you need. All you have to do, you hold for the last shot. You don't have to be in a hurry. And I see why Wimby threw the ball to Castle.
Ray
Stop.
Lunchbox
No, no. Castle was looking right at him. And then point four seconds. He turns his head. And in that point four seconds, Wimby threw the ball. It was 0.4 seconds. So we, we act like it was like if you watch it, Castle's looking at him, looking at him, looking at him. Turns his. Wimby throws it.
Ray
Wimby for the guy that does the between the legs at the top of the key. Why all of a sudden are you passing it to the point guard? Wild concept.
Lunchbox
I agree.
Ray
Don't you want to do another one of your three point logo threes?
Lunchbox
And then the last play of the game, we just hold the ball. Hold the ball. Then with two seconds left, we set a screen and do it. We don't give a chance for an offensive rebound. Absolutely stupid. Right? When you catch the ball, Fox, go to the hole. Go to the hole. When we just sprint to the rim and try to get the rebound. It was heartbreaking.
Ray
That's a tough hole.
Lunchbox
We're down two zero. We lost both games in San Antonio
Ray
and I. I can't do it. No. Spurs in four like you said.
Lunchbox
I said spurs and five.
Ray
Well, that's also still statistically possible.
Lunchbox
Me and Parker McCollum are both gonna be wrong. But it's gonna be spurs and six.
Ray
That's what I said. Thanks.
Lunchbox
Spurs and six. Everybody's burying us.
Ray
No, they'll win in Madison Square, guaranteed.
Lunchbox
Everybody is burying us. But let me tell you something. The spurs have. They have fight. And here's the thing. The Knicks did I undersell how good
Ray
the Knicks were that Brunson dude changes possessions every minute.
Lunchbox
Brunson has been terrible. He hadn't even that good. He's shooting like 25% from the field. Carl Anthony Towns is who's been good. OG Anunoby has been really good.
Ray
Well, I mean, that's also somebody that just woke up to the score.
Lunchbox
Mikel Bridges was on fire on Friday night. When they're on defense, whoever Jalen Brunson is guarding, you should clear out and let them take Jalen Brunson one on one. Jalen Brunson can't play defense. What are we doing? Get him in foul trouble. Go right at him. The Knicks are not superstars. They're very good veterans that make the right plays. They're rugged, they're feisty, and they're, they're, they're tough. And the age thing, you're always like, oh, it doesn't matter. It has mattered in this series. And we're about to grow up. We're about to go to Madison Square Garden in about eight hours.
Ray
We'll be there and not there yet.
Lunchbox
No, no, I'm talking about the game will come on tv. Oh, and we're going to take it to the Knicks tonight. We're winning the game. We're going to. I mean, I know it's going to be rocking. I mean, the environment's going to be fantastic.
Ray
President Trump will be cheering it.
Lunchbox
I don't know if he'll be cheering. He'll be there. Do you think he'll be yelling?
Ray
Yeah, come. I was trying to do it. I had never done a Trump.
Lunchbox
Come on, do it. Let's hear it.
Ray
Wembiama. Huge in person. This game's gonna be great. That's all I got. I knew a better Obama.
Lunchbox
What's Obama?
Ray
I haven't heard him talk in a while, but it's. And that is how we are. We are about the people and that is how we are going to do it.
Lunchbox
That's pretty good. That's pretty good. It's pretty good. And so, yeah, man, I'm just like. It was a heartbreaking loss, but it was just like, man, we were right there in both games. I think we've been leading with two minutes ago, under two minutes ago. We've been had the lead and we've lost both of them. It's not like we're playing terrible. We're right there. But the Knicks have made more plays and I, it's, it's sad and I'm not giving up hope. We Lose the night, series is over.
Ray
Gotta love though. I. Checking box scores. Statistical Susan. Gotta love Wimbiyama shooting nine three point.
Lunchbox
No, you don't. You don't have to.
Ray
What are we doing?
Lunchbox
I don't know. It's very frustrating. Geez, dude, it's very. And I wish Darren Fox on. On Friday night would have taken more shots because he was. He was hot. He's playing well. Getting to the hoop. Getting to the hoop. Getting the hoop. Dylan Harper. Getting to the hoop. Champagne? He didn't do much, Vassal. Not really. But tonight's our night, man.
Ray
Well, when I think about my boys at the distribution center Walmart in New Braunfels, that must have been a tough day at work that next day because it's weekend shifts.
Lunchbox
Yeah.
Ray
So you do Saturday, Sunday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday. Three days on, four days off. And that first day, that Saturday, right after that game, dude, it must have been in that warehouse. You probably could have heard a pin drop. Well, except for the front end loaders and all the crates getting thrown.
Lunchbox
It was a rough one, man. I watched it. The kids went to bed, fools would
Ray
go to the game, drive at night, park in the parking lot, sleep for like two hours, then go to work. Yeah, that's how die hard those first fans were.
Lunchbox
Yeah, I used to do that when I was a game day crew. First couple years on the radio, I still did it. Drove to San Antonio on game days, would sleep at batter's box's house during the afternoon, like take a nap. Then I'd go get the Chinese food place right there. Best, best sesame chicken I've ever had in my life. Right by where we lived. He lived. And then I would eat that. And then I would go to the spurs game and drive home at 11 o' clock at night and get up for the show in the morning. It was really dumb. Yeah, but it was. I got to win another championship. 2005. I was on the court. It was amazing. So hey, people are counting us out. They think Nick's all. They got it wrapped up. It's over now, boys. We're coming tonight. Spurs, spurs and six. Watch it happen.
Ray
And guys, I've been pretty spot on with my crap. I told you the times that they've won, they've lost. I told you all that stuff. I really do think the spurs come back and win this. I really do. And I've been pretty spot on with all I told you guys. Game one was going to go to the Knicks. I've. And me and me and Toolbox both said Spurs Win the whole thing. I really do think they come back and win the whole thing.
Lunchbox
Let's hope, man. Cause it was. I was shocked.
Ray
I had a pool to fill up. It only took five hours, starting at about 9am it wasn't ready till about 2pm but the whole time I'm filling that pool up, I was like, how did they lose that game?
Lunchbox
It was an incredible comeback.
Ray
I mean, it. It really turned this. I mean, it's one one, boom. Anybody's ballgame, right?
Lunchbox
20 at your home court.
Ray
I mean, the odds have shifted.
Lunchbox
Oh yeah.
Ray
It's like plus 400.
Lunchbox
It's like minus like 550 for the Knicks.
Ray
Like, guys, I don't know who you guys bet any truckers or you guys listening to Chris Mabe. Mabe knows ball or whatever. Guys, I would do spurs futures. I mean, now's the time to take it, man.
Lunchbox
And what's crazy is our defense is so good. Brunson has been held in check, but Carl Anthony Town. The offensive rebounding has been killing us. They've been getting offensive rebounds, kicking it out for three Drano.
Ray
Oh, yeah. I knew it was going to be a cold, dark morning on Saturday for you. Yeah.
Lunchbox
I didn't talk to my kids for five hours. I was like, get away from me.
Ray
You gotta go to bed after that game. See, that's why I love not betting. And never really. That game would have given me anxiety, not even having a dollar on it.
Lunchbox
It was so fun.
Ray
That's why I like just waking up to it. I'm like, duff, they lost. How did they lose?
Lunchbox
It's the new and Wimby is 7 foot 100. And we settle for a fade away jumper at the buzzer. Like, I don't know. Oh, man. Tonight's the night. Go Spurs. Go enjoy the game.
Ray
I think Billy's in and out of fandom. I got no text from Billy about the game at all. All he's been talking about is planning a trip. And I'm like, bro, aren't you in a dark spot right now with the Spurs?
Lunchbox
Yeah, man.
Ray
He wore his polo to work the other day. Spurs polo. He only breaks that out when it's finals time.
Lunchbox
That's impressive. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I had to wash the shirt and shorts I've been wearing. Gotta wash them again. Cause they lost two games in a row. I thought I washed off the stank, but guess not. And I didn't. I mean, I. I had to catch up to the game. I started it late. Cause we went to the pool. Pool closes 8. Game started at 7:30, so I didn't get home till 8:15 Friday night. So I caught up, though. I watched the end live. Like, I was able to fast forward through halftime and everything, but I definitely was behind the whole game. So I had my phone off.
Ray
Smart.
Lunchbox
So if people were texting, I didn't get it. But no one caught on because I caught up by the end. So batter's box didn't be like, you don't want sports. You're a loser.
Ray
Yeah, we were. We were golfing on the back patio. Sun was just beaten down, ordered Little Caesars, ate that stuffed crust pizza. I lasted about two minutes into the game. I was like, ah, spurs got this one, went to bed.
Lunchbox
Oh, man. Yeah, that's what someone on the Facebook page nailed it. And goes. This is the recap. Raymond Sizzle Raymundo woke up to the box score. Lunchbox is mad. No more questions at this time.
Ray
That's pretty spot on.
Lunchbox
Pretty spot on. And on Saturday night, dude, I watched the second period of the Golden Knights and the Hurricanes. Wild Golden Knight score four. And I was like, well, at least I don't have to watch the third period. I go up and I went in the bathroom, brush my teeth, getting in bed. Hey, look at the score. Whoa. Four, three, seven minutes to go. I should probably go downstairs and watch it. I'm going golfing with baby box in the morning. Got to get up early. I'll just go to bed. I mean, it's over. I woke up the morning. Five, four, double overtime. Thank God I didn't go downstairs to watch it. Thank God you'd have been up all night.
Ray
And also, Portnoy, he agrees with me. The spurs game and next game should have been Sunday. Why can that game not be 2pm on a Sunday? Why? Why is it Monday night at 7:30? Why? You didn't need that many days off. They could have had a Saturday off and then do it Sunday. Come on.
Lunchbox
So now we'll go Monday, Wednesday, Friday.
Ray
May not even get to that Monday game.
Lunchbox
3, 4, 5. Yeah, I don't know. That's weird. All right, have a good Monday, guys. I think we already paused, didn't we? Go spurs, go. Don't give up hope. Don't give up hope. Boys. We are still coming. You know what's annoying? I'm gonna tell you what's annoying is Oklahoma City fans chirping now that the spurs are losing. You guys can't chirp. You're on vacation. So annoying.
Ray
Oh, my gosh. If they get swept, the okc spurs series was our championship. If they get swept, nobody will even remember this finals. That'll be the memorable game. Spurs OKC.
Lunchbox
No, it won't. It'll be the Knicks winning 26 games in a row to win the title. All right, we gotta go and just hang up. Hang up. It's over. It's over. Man. So sad. Hey, everyone, it's Cal Penn. I'm inviting you to join the best sounding book club you've ever heard with my podcast, Hearsay, The Audible, and iHeart Audiobook Club. Every episode, I nerd out with amazing guests and dive into the best new audiobooks available on Audible. It's the book club for your ears. Listen to Earsay, the Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club on the iHeartradio app or wherever you get your podcasts.
Cal Penn
If you're feeling off fatigue, mood changes, skin shifts, yet your labs say everything's normal. You're not alone. Meet Oestra from Inner Balance, the first all in one prescription strength bioidentical hormone cream that's natural and effective and only takes one drop, 10 seconds a day. Oester replaces five to six products women typically use to treat symptoms and is third party tested to ensure the highest quality. Visit innerbalance.com today to start feeling like yourself again.
Lunchbox
That's innerbalance.com I'm U.S. transportation Secretary Sean Duffy. We all seem to be in a rush these days, from work to driving our kids around. But when you're behind the wheel, please do not speed. A few minutes saved by going faster is never worth the risk. So follow the speed limit, enjoy the drive, maybe bring some snacks for the kids. And know that along the way, you're getting quality time with your family, paid for by NHTSA. M&M's Popped Caramel do sound different.
Ray
Oh, no.
Lunchbox
People are gonna be obsessed. What do you mean? People hate the sound of chewing.
Ray
Maybe they won't like the crunch.
Lunchbox
Maybe we're saved. Wait a minute. Yellow. Have you been eating them this whole time? Mmm.
Ray
So tasty.
Lunchbox
Hands off us. M&M's popped caramel. It's more fun together. This is an I heart podcast. Guaranteed human.
Date: June 14, 2026
Hosts: Lunchbox & Ray
Episode Focus: Fun poolside drama, parenthood at the pool, and the sweet chaos of raising kids—plus, plenty of sports and life tangents with a classic Sore Losers spin.
This summer-flavored episode zeroes in on parenthood and neighborly dynamics at the community pool, culminating in a classic Lunchbox-style confrontation over splashing. The hosts swap stories about family time, kid-fueled chaos at the pool, and adventures in youth sports. With vibrant storytelling and sidebars about pool etiquette, neighborhood customs, and their passionate sports fandom, the Sore Losers capture the humor and frustrations of suburban summer life.
"July 1st you will be able to start your tickets... the add ons...July 15th because you gotta wait for the Preds schedule to come out."
—Lunchbox (03:53)
"You don't need an ocean...All you need is a floaty...and you’re on some sort of water. Eases the whole body..."
—Ray (09:44)
"It is the wild, wild west out there."
—Lunchbox (12:16)
"Some of the time is nice, but just the constant. Jump off the diving board, me, swim to the side, go. Swim back out..."
—Lunchbox (18:28)
“That was one of the more devastating losses of my San Antonio Spurs cheering career.” —Lunchbox (41:06)
Conversational, self-deprecating, and lively; the hosts riff with good-natured complaints about the highs and lows of parenthood, suburban summer traditions, and their dedication to both sports and family. The vibe is comedic and relatable, punctuated by teasing, deadpan narratives, and the occasional side-eye at community norms.
This is a masterclass in Sore Losers banter—blending humor, frustration, and warmth, all with big neighborhood energy.