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Is it in you?
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Oh. Oh, my God.
A
Happy birthday.
B
Tell me you're filming that.
A
Yeah.
B
That'S great.
A
Out of breath. I came in the room.
B
Dude.
A
It'S Ibiza. Oh, dude.
B
Oh.
A
I was recording both. If you want to just keep rolling.
B
That was hilarious. We'll stop that so we have that clip for sure.
A
All right. That was hilarious.
B
Oh. Oh, my God.
A
And I'm rolling on the other one if we want to just keep going. Get in here. Ibiza.
B
I did the same thing. I did the same thing, dude.
A
Happy birthday, starshine.
B
Thank you, man. I'm having a frat party this week.
A
Hey, there's one left. Who wants to shoot it?
B
Oh, my gosh. We literally were like, did someone get shot? I thought so too, dude.
A
We literally thought it was a gun.
B
I said, oh, out of all of us.
A
I was like, I hope you know.
B
You have to clean this up now.
A
Yeah, I'll tell Anna. Yeah, good luck with that.
B
She'll tell you to off. This is terrifying. Oh, that got me good, dude. That's hilarious.
A
I got this beast. We can just keep this rolling.
B
Okay. What other beast were you recording with?
A
I was doing the video and then the audio.
B
Oh. Oh, wow. Okay.
A
Dude, that was crazy. I came around the corner and I saw You. And I was like, I gotta get in the room. And that thing was in my way. I was like. I didn't want it to look like I was ducking under something, so. Oh, that's hurting.
B
God. Oh.
A
All right, we'll have to do the math. I can give you, I'll give you the numbers, but I'll subtract, like the beginning of it.
B
Okay. You don't want to leave it in there.
A
It's like complete dead air for like three minutes.
B
You're right. All right, all right.
A
Oh, dude, you got to let me recover for a second.
B
Holy crap. That was, that was great, dude.
A
So I did these same party poppers for Bazer and they didn't work.
B
Where did you get those?
A
They're awesome. They are so cool.
B
So loud. And that's a lot of confetti.
A
How much you think they are?
B
Six bucks.
A
Three bucks? No way. Freaking dynamite in a can for $3 in the world.
B
Guys, it's called a confetti cannon. Oh, my twist popper Lancer de confettis unique confetti cannon. This is great, dude.
A
Wow.
B
I, I have to say. Are we recording? Are we doing video? Do I need to video? Okay, no. Because I thought we were gonna try to do that program, but it doesn't matter.
A
Yeah.
B
Anyway, dude, you want to know what's on the menu today?
A
I don't want you distracted with your damn hitting the numbers.
B
No, no. You want to know what's on the menu today?
A
Yeah. Yeah.
B
I live with the drama queen. Another rendition of Was Big D lying and.
A
And other update with that one.
B
Oh. Oh, God. And lunchbox hits the golf course, thankfully.
A
Oh, boy.
B
It was a drama filled day on the course. It was amazing. It was awesome. And yeah, man, it's my birthday. Happy birthday to Oscar. Happy birthday to Justin.
A
Happy birthday.
B
Happy birthday to Amy. Happy birthday to Sydney. Everybody that shares a birthday. July 25th. Today is your day.
A
Gotta say, pretty popular birthday day.
B
Pretty wild that I have that many friends that have the same birthday as me.
A
Well, and then on my birthday, Arnold's chick Abby. I already had a twin my entire life.
B
That's wild.
A
And then I have a coworker the exact same day as me that works one foot from me.
B
I mean, the coworker that stands right to your left that you can reach out and touch.
A
Gotta make sure I didn't turn anything off when I was hitting those M80s.
B
Oh, my gosh. Let's start the show, man. Then we'll get to the menu. I, I, I know but we got to start the show. Show. Like, you got to do the. The.
A
Still got one.
B
No, no, no. We can't. We can do it at the end of the episode.
A
We can jack with somebody.
B
Oh, my God.
A
Scare the crap out of somebody.
B
Hey. Go up behind someone in the parking garage.
A
No, it sounds like a gun.
B
Yeah, we. That's why we.
A
Dude, you thought you got shot twice. Dude, I said you grab your heart.
B
I did. I said S. Dude, I said the S word. I said the S word. So, so loud.
A
Oh, man.
B
All right, let's hit it, dude. Let's start the show.
A
Yeah. Yeah. We're ready.
B
Wow. That was good, dude. Well done. That is so good.
A
That's so good. The kids late. In true lunch fashion, I'm sitting here for eight minutes, dumbest thing ever, and my heart is pounding out of my chest. I'm literally shooting a gun. It's me and you. I'm shooting a conversation confetti cannon at you in our 40s. Who cares? And my heart was beating through my chest because you didn't want. Literally, who cares? It was only us. And then Ibiza, because you didn't want.
B
To miss the moment.
A
Ibiza came in and said that scared us. We thought it was a gun.
B
It sounded like a gunshot. That sounds like. Sorry.
A
Yeah, because somebody got a gun in here, and there's no broken glass.
B
Well, I mean, maybe. Never mind. Yeah. Yeah. You know, he doesn't have to have broken glass to have a gun in somewhere. Just so you know.
A
But there's so many windows that you would have heard something else besides the pop.
B
You're probably right. That's a good point.
A
All right, we're gonna do it live.
B
We are the 1, 2, 3, soar, loser. What up, everybody? I am Lunchbox. I know the most about sports, so I'll give you the sports facts, my sports opinions, because I'm pretty much a sports genius.
A
Y', all, it is Sizzin Raymundo from the north. Alpha male. Bazer's my wife. We live on the north side of Nashville. Indian Lake is a beautiful community. We got 2.2 acres, 2.2 kids at Vanderbilt. Justin should have the day off for his birthday as well. Not to steal your thunder, but he needs to check on those 2.2 eggs at Vanderbilt. And, yeah, the corn. We wanted it to be knee high by the 4th of July. We got it. We won't sell. We won't sell. Over to you.
B
I did get a text from Justin, and it said, hey, Birthday brunch tomorrow, 11:30. Be there. Thanks. Unfortunately, I can't make it, man. We have a birthday party at 11:30. I was hoping more of an 8am breakfast. That's more the time we eat breakfast because I'm up at 6am on the weekends with the kids. So I was hoping that he would be having breakfast at 8, 11:30. Too late for my blood. Kids take priority at their. Kids take priority after about 6:00am so, sorry, Justin. Thank you for the courtesy sympathy invite, but I will not be able to make it. Tell your sisters. I will not be able to meet them either.
A
And you want to know the backstory on that one. Yeah, he had people cancel, so that's.
B
How I got in. Yeah, that's what I'm talking about.
A
He knew you weren't going to come, but he goes, hey, I booked this place for eight and we have six. You think that's going to be a problem? They're going to charge me. I don't think. They just charge you per chair.
B
No, they don't charge you per chair. They just have a table with eight chairs. And then when you show up, they'll only use six of them.
A
But these places now in Nashville, they hit the card if you really. Yeah, that's why you put one on file. So bays are always. Ask us a day before. Okay, is everybody for sure coming? They'll pop you for 50.
B
Oh, oh.
A
Either you're. If they're not coming, we're gonna fake like we have invisible friends because I'm not getting hit for 50.
B
Yeah, I would just be like, hey, random guy on the street. Homeless guy. You know how you say, you want some food? Come on, come have brunch with us, man. You don't want the food? Fine.
A
There's mimosas.
B
Okay, cool.
A
Well, that's what Justin said. He goes, hey, we need two more people. And I said, you're saying we need seat fillers? And then I go, so our Uber driver might work. And then we will need one more. He's trying to seat Phil for his 40th. He doesn't even have eight friends.
B
Question.
A
Including himself is a going, no, she's got. It's the reason I said birthday thing. She's got a birthday thing. Then Laura's, I guess Ali's birthday's this weekend. There's another thing on Sunday. Wow, it must be the New Year's Christmas time babies.
B
Yes, it's my birthday today. And Baby Box 2, who will be on the pod Monday, said, dad, is it okay if we get a chocolate cake and I'm like what? And he goes I know you like cheesecake, dad, but I don't really like it. Can we get a chocolate cake for your birthday? And so it appears that I told my wife, look, if you're going to get a cake, just get a chocolate cake. If you go somewhere they have one slice of cheesecake that is fine. But I don't want the kid to not be able to eat cake on my birthday. It's not that big a deal. The birthday is more important for those kids now because we're just getting older.
A
Well and my interesting you said that somebody wanted to do something for your birthday that wasn't your favorite thing. Maybe my sister goes hey, we really want to do this Tigers Detroit Tigers game for your birthday. It would mean a lot to dad if the his two twin boys go to the same we all go to the Tigers game together. And I said great, he can do that for his birthday. This is my birthday. It can mean a lot on his birthday. Right?
B
That's a good point. That's a great. When is your dad's birthday?
A
The Tigers will be welling out by the time his December. Yeah, they'll be licking their wounds after a 20 game losing stream.
B
Dude, they are ice cold. How cold? Oh, it's cold.
A
I my dad, he gives me updates every day like I don't know, they got beat.
B
They were down 11 to 1 yesterday.
A
Tigers shelled again last night. Even the announcers are getting concerned now this team has got to get out of this hole now or current hole just might get too deep where they can't get out of it. And I said wait on the tickets when we're going to the Tigers game for birthday. I said we may get bogo tickets in September blue light special type things. I said never seen a team so hot go this cold. And he said sorry, everything is purchased and in place for that weekend so you better keep rooting for those Tigers. It's unbelievable. The entire team is in a hole and only player right now trying to get team upward is school. Well, school ball's gone in about a year.
B
I mean school ball is amazing and yes, so I do love me some cheesecake and I do want cheesecake for my birthday so I assume my wife will come through with some cheesecake but I hopefully she gets a chocolate cake so the kids can enjoy it because I can understand cheesecake is probably a grown up thing. Like kids don't like cheesecake. They like the frosting and the icing which is which I hate.
A
You're Right. We never ate cheesecake as kids. It's something sour. Maybe it's a more northeast type thing. Nantucket, if you will. Martha's Vineyard, places like that. I don't know about the Hamptons.
B
I wonder where I learned about cheesecake, because I have no idea. I don't think I had cheesecake probably in my 20s.
A
But it is a different flavor. I didn't like it originally, but I love it now.
B
Yeah, it's kind of like beer. It. It's an acquired taste. You got to have it a couple of times, and you're like, this is.
A
Kind of good with jalapenos. I never liked them growing up. And then now every pizza, I can't get it without jalapeno. Whoa.
B
Oh, every pizza, huh?
A
When you and me go to 5th and B, I get those sashimo peppers on the pizza.
B
Sashimo peppers are not jalapenos.
A
Different type. They're like those red ones.
B
They're like, mild. They're like. They're like sweet peppers.
A
Freaking. The pizza place will be like, okay, so you said pepperoni pizza, cheese ranch. Anything else? I said jalapenos. Oh, my gosh, dude, that would have ruined the entire pizza. Jalapenos. Put it on there twice. Yes. Make yourself a note. My pizza place is so bad. Every time they forget something, if you don't tell them the drink, they'll never give you the drink. Done it multiple times. I get all the way home, forgot the drink, and obviously they didn't give it to me. So this time I go back, forget the drink again. Hey, yeah, I got a sweet tea. Oh, okay. Yeah. And I'm thinking, so you guys don't have in your system, so hold on.
B
You drive back for your sweet tea. How far is it?
A
No, it's right next to where I live.
B
Got it.
A
But it's the sweet tea. That's a small note. Okay. He ordered extra ranch sweet tea. How hard is that? If I work at a restaurant, this guy ordered pizza, sweet tea, jalapenos, ranch. It's just a note. I go in there, no ranch, no sweet tea. So I guess the person on the phone, if they hear a drink, there's like, scrap it. Unless they ask for it.
B
It's like when we. We ordered to go food, my wife's always like, make sure you check it before you leave.
A
You got to.
B
Here's my problem is I show up and they have the bag tied. So I'm like, oh, man, it looks so perfect. There's no way they would mess that up. You know, they obviously looked in there and they even tell you, oh, I checked it. I'm like, oh, okay, thank you. And then I get home missing an item and I'm always like, dang it, why didn't I check? Like. Or I just count the boxes. I'm like, one box, two box, three box, four, five boxes. Good, good to go.
A
Yeah, the.
B
And one of the boxes is just like utensils.
A
And I'm like, oh, that was the box count.
B
You thought I just do the box count and I get thrown off sometimes. But hey, it happens, man.
A
To go food and your rush too. If it's a drive through, there's no checking it.
B
No, there's no checking at the drive thru. Usually if we're. If I have the whole family with me and I'm handing it out, I'll pull like right over.
A
Yeah.
B
And then I'm handing it out so I know whose is in there and whose is not, then okay, I can go back in. But if it's just me in the drive through and I'm taking it home, no chance I'm checking that dang bag.
A
This story may not have an ending, but just reminded me. I used to have a radio internship my senior year of high school. It's pretty dope. Was at a random station. Okay, Midday Mike, crazy guy.
B
Oh, he was fun, man.
A
He would go party all night and then come in at noon. He was a midday wow. And so that's. And it was he. I remember he'd always order food. We'd do drive throughs. He got to the point where he's always checking it, always checking it. We go to this wing place and for whatever reason he didn't check it. We get back to the radio station and he's like, are you kidding me? This how he starts his days. Like you, you get back in the van, we're going. So me and him go back to the restaurant. He doesn't go through the drive thru and complain. He goes into the store and goes, how many times have I ordered from you guys? And you forget the chicken wings because I didn't do as many as he wanted or whatever. And that's how he started his day. Just losing it on this person for leaving. I guess he got ranch and maybe some beer battered. And then they left off the Cajuns. And he. A night. I'm talking vocabulary burial service at noon. And that started my internship like a weekend. I was like, okay, this got real.
B
See, I thought midday Mike was going to turn on the microphone and go A little crazy.
A
I thought, hey, that's a greater power.
B
I literally thought Midday bike was about to get on there and go, you know, a wing stop. How could you forget wings and more, whatever they are and just start ripping them a new one on the air? And I was like, dang, that dude is crazy. And I was asking you, where is Midday Mike now?
A
I tried looking it up. He definitely got fired. Because I went there a year maybe after I graduated. And the lady there goes, yeah, he doesn't work here anymore. He got let go. He was originally always from Chicago. His last name was impossible to spell, like Kruzynski. Mike Kruzerzinski.
B
Oh my God. Hold on, hold on. You're telling me he's the guy that came became the Duke head coach? Mike Krzyzewski?
A
No. But if anybody can find this dude radio. It was a country station in Marquette, Michigan. Mike Kurzyzimski in the 2000s. Amazing. He was hilarious. Got fired. He went hard every night. So it was eventually going to happen, but it wasn't because of the chicken wings. Good dude. But I'm guessing back in Chicago, Gotta be.
B
Hey, Midday Mike, if you're listening, hit us up. We are the sore losers. Gmail.com. uh, we're going to take a break and I need. Do you want to go update first? What do you want to do?
A
We can do update.
B
We'll be right back.
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Yo, what's the update, man?
A
Hey, so you're writing these times down? Then we'll just do some multiplication.
B
Yeah, I got it. I already got it. I already got it, cuz I'm going.
A
To have to subtract at the beginning.
B
Don't worry.
A
Yeah, no more shop talk, though. These people, it's confusing the truckers. They don't know what's going on. So there is an update. The big segment that we do was Big D lying. I get hit up by him and something to the degree of my wife had one of her friends hit her up and asked if she went topless at South Beach. Hey, what? Should I respond back? Dang, dude, didn't know I was that famous.
B
No, you reply, well, did she.
A
So.
B
Or you say, hey, can you send me a pic so I know you have proof? So we. So we can end the segment? Was Big D lying?
A
Socials, our biggest segment. I think we got to cancel it. There is one more.
B
Yeah, I know, I know, but I don't want to.
A
As long as you don't put it in the title.
B
I didn't even put it in the title last time.
A
Oh, all right. We'll do one more edition of Was Big D lying?
B
So are you guys still cool?
A
I haven't responded. I. Dude, I put that stuff. I shelved that stuff till two days.
B
Hold on, hold on. So he texted you on what day?
A
A group text all last night. Blew up. Not dealing with it. My name is Bennett. I ain't in it. My name is Paul. It's up to y'.
B
All.
A
Well, I am kind of involved.
B
I think you are kind of involved. So he said, hey, man, why did you talk about my wife going topless? Like, explain to me what the text said. Was he mad?
A
Blank has friends texting her asking if she went to a nude beach in Miami. This is a text thread with friends. Another guy goes, huh? And then another friend said, wrong text thread, Big D. Then somebody else goes, or. And then he goes, I made the podcast for the wrong story. And my buddy goes, d. A. And then another friend goes, podcast question mark. They're all in a tailspin.
B
Oh, man. Are we sure you want to play this game?
A
Yeah, because it's fine.
B
Okay. All right, all right, let me hear it. Was Big D lying.
A
So one of his kids and Barron Trump were born around the same Time.
B
Okay. Barron Trump is the kid that's at one of those universities, but I don't know if he still goes there.
A
President Trump's kid?
B
Yeah, yeah, but he was at some university. Does he still go there?
A
I don't know, but more known for being President Trump's kid.
B
I understand. But in the news it says, oh, Baron Trump's going to this school and they show him on campus. I don't know what school it was though.
A
Oh, right, yeah. Mir a Lago Middle School. That's what he's known for.
B
He's in like college, I think.
A
Yeah.
B
So he's really tall guy. Yes. Yeah.
A
How tall is he?
B
I don't know.
A
So I think Big D didn't know that I knew about Baron Trump, that I just knew the word Trump. So he goes, oh, man. Yeah, my daughter, we. They grew up in the Mirago area. And he said, yeah, my daughter, she was always wearing hand me downs from Baron. So a girl was wearing clothes from a 67 baby.
B
Was big D lying? Huh?
A
This is a tough one because it's the obvious one.
B
No, no, cuz Big D is tall.
A
The dude had to have been four feet out of the womb.
B
No, no, no, Big D was tall.
A
Could your kids wear each other's clothes?
B
Yeah, but they're all around the same height.
A
I know, my point exactly. Barron Trump and a girl were the same height for their first two years of life.
B
That happens. It does, yes.
A
But it.
B
That's why I'm saying I'm kind of leaning that Big D may not be lying on this one, but do your.
A
Boys wear girls clothes?
B
Well, here's the thing, Ray, when you have. We didn't find out the gender of our kids. They've been wearing bloopers. So they were all gender neutral clothes. They've been wearing bloopers.
A
Boomers.
B
They were all just kind of like easy colors. Greens.
A
Whoa. Your kids were wearing pink?
B
No, we didn't have pink because we didn't know if it was a boy or girl.
A
Purple?
B
No, it was more like yellows. Green.
A
Whoa. Greens, girl.
B
Oh, I don't know about that.
A
Neon.
B
That's what I'm saying. So I could see where if you have an extra tall baby. And I would assume Baron was a tall baby.
A
No crap.
B
I would assume that Big D's daughter was a tall baby. Oh, it is Big D. That's what I'm saying. Big D wasn't lying.
A
I just realized that one right now.
B
You do. Like if you have an extra large baby, you would probably Put a post somewhere and be like, hey, my kid is extra big. Does anybody have clothes?
A
Trump responded well.
B
Yeah.
A
Huge. Big. We got a. We got.
B
We got a kid named Baron. We got a kid named Baron and he.
A
My comedian.
B
Huge.
A
Good guy. Good guy. Ah, yeah. Hey, Big D. Ha. Yeah. Yeah. Donald. Yeah. Huge issue. I heard you have. Ah, yeah. Trying to get back in mode again.
B
You're almost there.
A
I know I'm almost there. I got to think of my comedian.
B
Is this a disaster so far today?
A
No, it's good.
B
It's hilarious.
A
Huge.
B
Are you trying to do Frank Caliendo?
A
He's a good guy. He is. He is. He's a good guy. So a Baron wears the same clothes. Big D, maybe. Same. Maybe they wear the clothes.
B
Yeah.
A
Okay. Good. Good guy. Yeah. Hey. Ooh. Ah. Huge.
B
So I'm gonna go with Big D on this. That if he grew up in the.
A
Where.
B
Mar a lago.
A
Mar a lago.
B
Mir a lago. If his daughter grew up there. Barron Trump grew up there. This is before Trump was in politics, so he may have been more out and about in the community. May have been not. He wasn't as famous then. So maybe they ran in the same circles.
A
Yeah, he's a good guy. Good guy.
B
Maybe they went to the same, you know, daycare. Maybe. I don't know how they crossed paths. Big D wasn't lying.
A
Thanks, guys. Huge issue. We solved it, though. Mira, lago.
B
Ah.
A
Hey, guys, hang on. So now, Gulf of America now, how.
B
Are you gonna respond?
A
I'll respond in three days. Give me space. It's the weekend. I'm not dealing with that. That's what I woke up to. I forgot we're famous, dude. My bad.
B
Yeah, but I.
A
Hey, sometimes I put out those little feelers. Podcast is booming.
B
But my question is, if they did go topless, who cares?
A
Okay, drop it, Ray. What size?
B
No. Okay, I'll just drop it. I'll just move on. I'll just move on. I'll move on.
A
I went from canceling the segment to talking about it for 10 minutes.
B
Exactly.
A
Doing a trumpet.
B
That's why.
A
A terrible one. I gotta listen to my impersonator again. I freaking lost.
B
Who's your impersonator?
A
Guy that you don't know. Steve will do it. But Steve will do. It's best friends with this impersonator who does all the motions. His arm, everything looks exactly. And he goes to like, he'll go to friggin Venice beach and he'll be like, you know, that's. And he'll Just. And those people hate him. California doesn't love President Trump. And so a lot of them will yell at him and cuss at him and he'll be like, what? What do you. You need us to take care of you? Okay, yeah, yeah. Well. And he acts like he's the President. It's phenomenal. Can't remember his name. Can't remember the impersonation. There you go.
B
Oh, man, that's great. I mean, I'm glad I can look him up. If I look up. Steve can do it.
A
Will do it. And he's all over his.
B
And then his friend is the one that does the impersonation and goes to Venice beach and people hate him. And he still does it. Does it. Got it.
A
He's like, yeah, that list, that Epstein list, have you seen it? I haven't seen it. I haven't seen it. Have you seen it? We'll get that list. We'll get it for you. Real issues. And he acts like it's him.
B
Does he dress like him?
A
Yes.
B
Okay.
A
And he's like, you work, You're a waitress. Ah, we got a one big beautiful bill. We're gonna help you out. We're gonna get you some money. I love the African American community. And then he goes right at these people. They're like, they talk to him like, it's like, no, I hate how you do that. He's like, I love them.
B
I love them.
A
They're great people. Great people.
B
I mean, I could see it. It's funny. It's funny. We'll take a break. We'll be right back.
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Ray, you inspired me, man. I said, I'm gonna go play some golf. And so, Ray, I went out there and you were scared off by the heat. Ray, you said you almost quit the game was the quote you gave me. So I show up to the golf course on Wednesday around 12:31 o', clock, and let me tell you, there is not a soul out on that golf course.
A
Muni.
B
Local muni. Not that local Muni, but another Muni.
A
I know the one.
B
And I mean, there's some cars in the parking lot, but I saw two dudes on one hole. I mean, then like, six holes later, you could see another couple dudes. It was wide open.
A
How's it going, dudes?
B
So I walk into the clubhouse, and I'm like, hey, man, I want to play 18.
A
You guys want to dude up?
B
And they're like, oh, perfect timing, dude. There's a twosome about to tee off. You can jump in with them.
A
They said, dude, and you're saying, dudes and two dudes on the course is just a dude course.
B
And, well, he said two guys, but I just say dudes and those dudes. My whole thought was like, he couldn't say, hey, dude, like, there's two dudes about to go out. Why don't you go ahead and go ahead of them? He's like, why don't you jump in with them?
A
I'm a dude.
B
So I'm like, all right. So I go up to the first tee box, and there's two guys. I'm like, hey, how you doing, man? Gibbles, he's. I'm Patrick. Another guy is Steven. Nice to meet you guys. All right, cool. And Patrick gets up there to tee off, does his practice swings, lines it up. Here we go. Swinging a miss. No, no, no. Swinging a miss. All right, cool, cool, cool, cool. All right. Gets it up there again, stands there. Swing, swing and miss. Okay, let's do it a third time. Here we go. Bottom feeder gets up there, does his whole routine, lines it up, back swing, swings and miss. Bazer hits the ball, and I'm like, bro, you're out. Like, that's three strikes.
A
You're out. Like, come on, baseball rules.
B
Yeah, I'm like, this. We can't do this pitch clock. So then he goes up there for a fourth time, and he gets up There.
A
Oh, what was a foul ball.
B
Boom. And he gets a hold of it about 150.
A
I'll take that.
B
Feet. Oh, feet.
A
Okay, I get the joke.
B
Yes.
A
I'll take 150 yards.
B
Yeah, I agree, Ray. He proceeded to take a 20 on the whole.
A
Yeah, that's double snowman. And then some change.
B
Now that's a long time. That is a long time to be sitting there waiting on someone. He swung and missed three times on the tee box.
A
And we're past that. I bet I have a 20 somewhere in my long life legacy, lineage of golf. Not any time recently. I always worse is eight. Yeah, we're hanging in the sixes and sevens.
B
It was a rough, it was a rough start. I was like, this is what my day is going to be like. He swung, missed three times on the tee box. And then he proceeded to hit 20 shots to make it in the hole. And I'm not saying, hey, if you, if you shoot 20 shots, whatever, that's your thing. And it's a good thing he was out there playing when no one is out there, or else people would have been ready to murder this guy. So we pull up to the second tee box and I was like, oh, guys, I just got a text from my wife saying that I got to pick up the kids, so I'm just going to go ahead and play ahead of you guys. I got to get done pretty quick.
A
Prove the text.
B
And Patrick's like, man, I'm really sorry if I'm slowing you down, man. No. And I'm like, no, no, man, I, I really. You guys seem like nice guys. It's just my wife just texted me that she's got a meeting that just popped up at work and so I'm gonna have to go ahead and go.
A
My wife text me that Hulk Hogan died, guys, I got a rush.
B
No, no, that was the day before. So she. Unless she saw the future. And so I freaking smoking through the round, dude. Just woo. Just no care in the world. Not anybody in front of me. I mean, just playing at my pace. If I mess up, I could drop a second ball, hit it again, no one around me.
A
Got it.
B
It was awesome. Till I drive up to number 14 and there's two guys and they're like, oh, sorry, man. There's a single in front of us. And he wouldn't let us play through. And I'm like, you caught a single. That's not good. So we're sitting there and I watch this guy and he hits. It's one armed Willie. Dude, he's playing with one arm.
A
The other one's. He doesn't think he's good enough for two. Or the other one's injured.
B
No, no, he just. He just would swing the club with one arm. He had two arms, but he would only swing with one.
A
But that is a thing.
B
It might be a thing. Okay, that's fine.
A
It is on Tic Tac.
B
I understand Tic Tac isn't real, so I am watching. So we're sitting there watching this guy in front of us play with one arm.
A
TikTok is real.
B
So here's the thing, though. He would hit it with one arm, they'd drop another. He was playing three balls with one arm.
A
You got to call him out for that. Dude, since when are you silent, Sally?
B
No, no, we. We tried. We were like, hey, can we play through? Since you're playing it. No, no, man. No. Okay. And then he was playing one arm, and so we had to sit there for four holes and watch One Arm Willie, even though he had two arms, because he would pick the ball up out of the cup with his left arm, but he'd only swing the club with his right arm.
A
You got to be more forceful. You're. So you're type A at work, and then you go to the course and you're type B.
B
No.
A
No worries, partner. We'll chill and watch.
B
Here's the thing. Is it really worth it at this point? We only have four holes to go, right?
A
Yes. But I'm saying, if he's doing three shots and One Arm Willie, that's cause for concern.
B
The one guy's like, I'm about to hit it to this guy. I'm gonna hit into this guy. And I'm like, guys, I don't know you guys, but, man, really, I mean, what good's it gonna do? It's just gonna make One Arm Willie mad. Like, you guys, we're both. We're all out here on a Wednesday afternoon. There's no one out here. I don't know how long it took you guys to play, but we're on hole number 15, and I've only been playing for an hour and 45 minutes. It took me two hours and 33 minutes to play 18 holes.
A
That's not bad.
B
That is unbelievable. Yeah, it was. That's with waiting on One Arm Willie to play his three balls the last four holes with his one damn arm.
A
You cooked?
B
I cooked. I mean, it wasn't my best round ever. Did I play unbelievable? No. Did I make any birdies? No.
A
You Didn't.
B
No.
A
Yeah, that hurts.
B
But that's okay. I mean, I had some really good shots, and then I had some really bad shots, but the heat, man, I was like, bring the heat on. Let it be hot outside. Because what hot does is scares away people. And then the golf course is your paradise. You can do whatever you want on that golf course, Ray.
A
I was hoping for lightning, because you know what that does? Kills people. Oh, okay.
B
No, that is not what I wanted. That's the problem. I don't. I don't want lightning. That would. No, no, no, no. That would. That would ruin the day.
A
Have you seen those pictures online? When it hit the pins.
B
Yes.
A
The market makes on a golf course.
B
Oh, my gosh.
A
Obviously never golf when it. Now you see why the golf courses are strict when it's lightning out.
B
Yeah, that's why if it lightning and you're walking, just throw your clubs down and walk away.
A
Okay, noted.
B
Because remember that one time we were playing and we went running back, had.
A
No idea a tree was in your house.
B
Yeah, that was bad. But it was a great day of golf, man.
A
It was a video out of it, guys. Check it out on our YouTube Soar Losers podcast.
B
Did you really?
A
After the fact, I didn't know your house was broken into by a tree. But we were just sitting there at the clubhouse, like, man, storms. Crazy out today.
B
Yeah, that was funny. I mean, we were playing at the local community, and all of a sudden there comes a storm, and we're running back to the clubhouse because it comes barreling in, and my wife calls like, can you come home? I think a tree branch fell on the roof. And I'm all right, Yeah, I guess I can come home. And deep down I'm thinking, I mean, a tree branch. You're crying over a tree branch? Like, this is the big deal. I'm like, all right. So I took the time to go into the clubhouse, ask for my rain check, get the rain check, walk into the car. And she's like. She calls, there's a hole in the roof. There's a hole in the roof or no. She goes, are you almost home yet? And I'm like, I'm just leaving. She goes, okay, hurry. And then I get home, and there is the biggest damn hole in my roof. And I said, hey, why didn't you say there was a big hole in the roof? I thought I did. I said, no, you said, you think a tree branch. This is more like a freaking tree. This is not a tree branch. This is the size of a freaking Tree on my roof. She's like, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. And there was water all in the house. Oh, my gosh.
A
Sorry to bring that up on your birthday, guys. He did mention a great point. Always get the rain check at the golf course and trim off a couple holes. If you were on hole 14, I just finished nine.
B
That's exactly what you say. Because if you finish 14, they're giving you nothing. You say nine. If you finished five, you finished three.
A
You finished four. You didn't start. You were getting hot dogs and missiles.
B
That's right. Now we're going to take a break and I'm going to come back and tell you about the drama queen I live with right after this.
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Dude, it's hot outside, right? But hot is okay. And my two kids, Baby Box 1 and Baby Box 2, will be reunited at their elementary school in a couple weeks. Baby Box one is going into first grade. Baby Box two is going into kindergarten. Couldn't be more proud of those guys. I mean, they are excellent human beings.
A
I mean, everybody gets passed, but okay.
B
And they said, hey, dad. Dad, can we ride bikes to our school? I said, look, man, it's 1:30 in the afternoon. Why wouldn't we ride bikes to your school right now in the middle of summer? Let me grab some waters. We'll throw it in the bag and let's go. Am I baby? Box is like, dad, can I bring my soccer ball so we can play some soccer? Absolutely, dude. Throw it in the bag, Rock. So we go riding the 1.6 miles to the school, and we get there at 1:48pm it is officially 95 degrees outside. And you look at it, it says 86% humidity. And they want to play a little two on one soccer.
A
Who's you? You and two, verse three.
B
Now me versus them two.
A
I'm kidding.
B
Got it. Sorry.
A
Yeah, Ray, it's me and the old one versus the three year old. It's usually pretty competitive.
B
And when you turn for it, just.
A
Crushing him 20 to nothing. Guys, maybe we switch up the teams next time. I'll meet you guys back at the house. See you there. You're 40 years older than them, dude.
B
But hey, when you're 44, you don't miss. You miss the jokes, okay? You know what I mean? Like, your brain doesn't work as fast. Shut up. So we play some soccer and we're playing full field, up and down, up and down, up and down. Oh, we got to get some water. We got to get some water. All right, so we get some water. Then they want to play on the playground. Play on the playground. Kick the soccer ball over, back and forth, over the playground. Then baby box one's like, we got to finish our soccer game. All right, let's go play. Running back and forth, back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. We're there a good hour. Running around in the 95 degree heat, 88% humidity. They're starting to sweat, like, and they're starting to turn red in the face. And I'm like, all right, boys, should we head home? No, I want to play some more. And he goes and kicks the ball one more time. And then baby box comes over and goes, dad, I think we need to go. And I'm like, why, dad? It's really hot. He goes, dad, I don't know what it means, but I think I'm overheating.
A
Yep.
B
I'm like, oh, okay.
A
Cat does it all the time. She has to then lay down and she'll try to lick herself to cool off.
B
And I said, all right, let's. Let's go ahead and go home, man. Let's, let's. Let's ride our bikes.
A
Smells like a lawnmower when she sweats because she has fur. Back to you.
B
And so we start riding our bikes. And I mean, we've gone A block. I'm like, how you doing, bud? Bud, are you okay? What the Baby box one. Are you okay?
A
What the Hogan.
B
Dad, I can't talk.
A
Dude, get him on your back. Ditch the bike, Michael.
B
What do you mean you can't talk? Dad, is it. Is it good to overheat? I think I'm overheating, dad. I'm like, dude, you've been outside for one hour. Like, it's not like we've been outside for three weeks.
A
I'm with him. I felt it with Big D. No, no, no, no. I'm with the kid.
B
He had two bottles of water in that hour that we were outside. And he is acting like he is walking across the Sahara desert. I'm like, bud, it's okay, man.
A
Get on your camel and let's go.
B
And he's like, dad, I don't think I'm gonna be able to talk the rest of the way home. I'm like, why? Why, bud? And he goes, because if I talk, I'm just gonna overheat more. And I'm like, okay. Okay. So we get to the golf course, which is three blocks from the school.
A
Okay, so he can see it, Bray. He can see the castle over the moat.
B
No, no, he can see his school from the golf course. The golf course from his school.
A
He can see your house from three blocks away.
B
No, the golf course. The muni. Holy. So we drive out onto the golf course and stop at one of the water coolers.
A
It's rich. Rich.
B
And there's golfers there. And I'm. And I'm like, sorry, guys, he's overheating.
A
He's at the Muni.
B
Yeah, we're at the muni.
A
Hey, what's this kid doing drinking our water? Dude, we're on a beer.
B
We're on the cart path, okay? I mean, we're on the cart path, and we are at the water cooler. There's three golf carts at the water cooler. And I'm like, guys, sorry. We've ridden a whole three blocks. This guy's gonna overheat. And they're like, are you okay, buddy? And he just. I was like, he can't talk because he thinks that's going to overheat him more.
A
Here you go, man. Have a Miller High life, Vandy, bro.
B
And I mean, he. He drinks some of the water, he powers through. He's like, okay, Dad, I think I can pedal more. I'm like, okay, bud. We start rolling, baby Box 2 is not complaining about anything. He's having the time of his life. He's pouring water on his head. He's having a blast. I'm like, baby box one, you want.
A
Some water on your head? No. He just won the MLS Cup.
B
Yeah. And I'm like, all right. So we get home, he's like, I need to lay down on the couch, Dad. I need to lay down on the couch. I'm like, all right. And he goes, dad, can I have a wet washcloth? Can I have a wet washcloth? And I'm like, okay. He's like. He puts it on his neck. He goes, dad, I really need you to help me put it on my head. I'm like, you're seven years old, dude. You can put it on your head. Like, you can put the washcloth on your head. I don't know if I can do it. I'm overheating. I'm like, all right. So I put it on his head. We have popsicles. He goes, all right, dad. That popsicle made me feel kind of okay, but I think. I think I need one more popsicle to stop the overheating.
A
Smart.
B
And I'm like, I think we're good. I think we're good. And he goes, no, dad, No, I mean, really, that one more popsicle. That one more popsicle is going to do it. All right, Here. Here's one more popsicle. That's another popsicle. He goes. He goes, dad, I think. I think that's the key to not overheating, is having popsicles.
A
Smart kid.
B
He's like, thank you, dad. Like, next time we go to the playground, though, Dad, I think you need to bring popsicles so we don't overheat.
A
That's America, man. Popcorn, too. Lather yourself in butter.
B
I'm like, dude, do you understand? And he's like, dad, that was. That was a hard day. That was a hard day. I was like, we were gone for an hour.
A
How do you think I feel when I come home from work?
B
It wasn't a hard day. It wasn't that difficult. We just went to the playground, and that's the diva I live with, man. I've never seen someone so ridiculously out of control.
A
Hey, before we go, I wanted to read a card Arnold wrote you for your birthday.
B
Okay. Yeah. Please read it.
A
It's pretty short and sweet, but it goes. Dear Lunchbox. He gave it to me. I'm reading in his voice.
B
Okay. Thank you.
A
Dear Lunchbox, as a small gift of appreciation for me and Sizzin on your birthday, I am allowing you to sleep with Abby. Oh. And then there's a P.S.
B
Okay, P.S. i get to watch.
A
Arnold.
B
I, I, I don't even know what to say, man. That would make our working, working relationship a little weird. I don't know if my wife would appreciate that. Yeah, I don't, I don't know. Happy birthday to me. Yeah, that one was all over the place, dude.
A
I think it was good.
B
I think it was good too, man. I, I'll tell you what, was this our best one of the week?
A
I bet. That celebration birthday celebration video. 20,000 views and we are back on YouTube, baby.
B
Yeah. And we got to put it on insta. We got to put it on a real.
A
We'll put it all over the place.
B
Yeah, that was a good one, man. And I gotta tell you what, I gotta head straight to the bathroom, man.
A
All right, man.
B
Yeah, I gotta, I gotta go number two.
A
Okay.
B
Yeah. All right. Was that. What, what one are we putting up on the weekend? Pod man. Monday. This one. This one. All right.
A
Gotta do some bleeping at the beginning.
B
Yeah. Yeah.
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All right.
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Podcast Summary: The Bobby Bones Show – SORE LOSERS: Happy Birthday Lunchbox!
Episode Information:
Introduction to the Episode
In this lively episode of The Bobby Bones Show, titled "SORE LOSERS: Happy Birthday Lunchbox!", hosts Bobby Bones and his co-host dive into a series of engaging conversations, humorous anecdotes, and birthday celebrations. Skipping the usual advertisements and introductory segments, the episode centers around celebrating birthdays, sharing personal stories, debating playful segments, and discussing family adventures.
[01:38] Bobby: "Happy birthday to Oscar. Happy birthday to Justin. Happy birthday to Amy. Happy birthday to Sydney. Everybody that shares a birthday. July 25th. Today is your day."
Bobby kicks off the episode by extending birthday wishes to several friends and listeners who share the same birthday on July 25th. This leads to a heartwarming discussion about the uniqueness and popularity of their birthdate.
[05:11] Co-host: "Gotta say, pretty popular birthday day."
The hosts reflect on the coincidence of having multiple friends and family members born on the same day, adding a personal touch to the episode.
[05:22] Bobby: "That's wild. And then on my birthday, Arnold's chick Abby. I already had a twin my entire life."
Bobby shares his experience of having multiple people, including a significant other named Abby and a coworker, sharing his birthday. This sparks a conversation about the dynamics of celebrating shared birthdays and the camaraderie it fosters.
[10:27] Co-host: "Baby Box 2, who will be on the pod Monday, said, 'Dad, is it okay if we get a chocolate cake?'"
The discussion shifts to Bobby's children, affectionately named Baby Box 1 and Baby Box 2, highlighting the importance of making birthdays special for the younger generation.
[13:24] Bobby: "My pizza place is so bad. Every time they forget something, if you don't tell them the drink, they'll never give you the drink."
Bobby narrates a relatable story about the frustrations of ordering food through drive-throughs, emphasizing how easy it is to miss items when there's no opportunity to check the order before leaving.
[14:22] Co-host: "We didn't find out the gender of our kids. They've been wearing bloopers. So they were all gender neutral clothes."
The conversation intertwines with family anecdotes, discussing how their children wear gender-neutral clothes, further humanizing the hosts and connecting with listeners' experiences.
[15:08] Bobby: "He would go party all night and then come in at noon. He was a midday wow."
Bobby reminisces about his senior year internship at a random radio station. He shares humorous memories of a colleague named Midday Mike, who was notorious for his strictness over missing food items in orders, showcasing the unpredictable nature of early career experiences.
[16:38] Co-host: "He always started his days on a bad note because of missing wings."
This story highlights the challenges and camaraderie faced during internships, offering listeners a glimpse into the behind-the-scenes of radio operations.
[20:53] Co-host: "We are the 1, 2, 3, soar, loser. What up, everybody? I am Lunchbox."
Transitioning into their signature segment, the hosts introduce "Was Big D Lying?", a playful debate examining whether Big D was truthful in a specific anecdote involving Big D's daughter wearing clothes that allegedly belonged to Barron Trump.
[21:12] Bobby: "We got a kid named Baron and he. My comedian."
They delve into the details, discussing the plausibility of Big D’s story, considering factors like the height similarities between Big D's daughter and Barron Trump. The conversation is both analytical and humorous, engaging listeners in a lighthearted investigation.
[22:24] Co-host: "That happens. It does, yes."
The hosts conclude that Big D was likely not lying, based on the circumstantial evidence and logical reasoning, ending the segment on a positive note.
[28:07] Co-host: "Ray, you inspired me, man. I said, I'm gonna go play some golf."
The episode shifts to a vivid recount of the hosts' golf outing on a scorching hot day. They describe the desolate golf course, emphasizing how the heat deterred other players, creating an almost private golfing paradise.
[29:33] Bobby: "Swinging a miss. Okay, cool, cool, cool, cool."
Bobby narrates the patience required while waiting for a slow golfer, aptly named One Arm Willie, who struggles with his swings, leading to humorous frustration.
[32:04] Bobby: "And my co-host is acting like he is walking across the Sahara desert."
The story culminates with Bobby rushing to leave the game due to a family emergency, highlighting the unpredictability of balancing hobbies with personal responsibilities.
[34:02] Co-host: "That is unbelievable. Yeah, it was."
The hosts laugh over the experience, sharing the challenges and funny moments that unfolded during their golf session.
[38:34] Co-host: "My two kids, Baby Box 1 and Baby Box 2, will be reunited at their elementary school in a couple weeks."
Transitioning to family stories, the hosts discuss their children's school activities. They share a particularly humorous and suspenseful incident where Baby Box 1 began overheating during a bike ride and soccer game.
[42:04] Bobby: "He's overheating. I'm like, dude, you've been outside for one hour."
Bobby describes his attempts to manage the situation, balancing concern with light-heartedness, illustrating the challenges of parenting energetic children.
[44:17] Co-host: "So I show up to the golf course on Wednesday around 12:31 o'clock, and let me tell you, there is not a soul out on that golf course."
The hosts intertwine stories of their morning routines, bike rides, and the unexpected challenges posed by extreme weather conditions, painting a relatable picture for listeners who juggle family life with personal interests.
[46:25] Bobby: "Dear Lunchbox, as a small gift of appreciation for me and Sizzin on your birthday, I am allowing you to sleep with Abby."
In a heartfelt and humorous segment, Bobby reads a birthday card written by Arnold. The outrageous content, including a playful note about Bobby being allowed to sleep with Abby, adds a layer of comedy and camaraderie among the hosts.
[46:57] Co-host: "I don't, I don't know. Happy birthday to me."
The co-host reacts with amusement, highlighting the playful and sometimes absurd humor that characterizes their interactions.
As the episode nears its end, the hosts reflect on the day's events and stories. They discuss the popularity of their YouTube content, touching on a “celebration birthday” video that garnered 20,000 views, indicating the growing engagement from their audience.
[47:24] Co-host: "Yeah, that was a good one, man. And I gotta tell you what, I gotta head straight to the bathroom, man."
Laughing off the day's events, the hosts maintain a light-hearted and jovial tone, ensuring listeners are entertained until the very end.
While the episode primarily focuses on content-driven discussions, the hosts conclude with casual banter and preparation for future segments. They discuss editing certain parts of the episode, ensuring the content remains engaging and appropriate for their audience.
Notable Quotes:
Bobby Bones [01:38]: "Happy birthday to Oscar. Happy birthday to Justin. Happy birthday to Amy. Happy birthday to Sydney. Everybody that shares a birthday. July 25th. Today is your day."
Co-host [05:11]: "Gotta say, pretty popular birthday day."
Bobby Bones [13:24]: "My pizza place is so bad. Every time they forget something, if you don't tell them the drink, they'll never give you the drink."
Bobby Bones [15:08]: "He would go party all night and then come in at noon. He was a midday wow."
Co-host [20:53]: "We are the 1, 2, 3, soar, loser. What up, everybody? I am Lunchbox."
Bobby Bones [21:12]: "We got a kid named Baron and he. My comedian."
Co-host [28:07]: "Ray, you inspired me, man. I said, I'm gonna go play some golf."
Bobby Bones [29:33]: "Swinging a miss. Okay, cool, cool, cool, cool."
Co-host [38:34]: "My two kids, Baby Box 1 and Baby Box 2, will be reunited at their elementary school in a couple weeks."
Bobby Bones [46:25]: "Dear Lunchbox, as a small gift of appreciation for me and Sizzin on your birthday, I am allowing you to sleep with Abby."
Conclusion
"SORE LOSERS: Happy Birthday Lunchbox!" is a vibrant and entertaining episode filled with personal stories, humorous exchanges, and heartfelt birthday celebrations. Bobby Bones and his co-host skillfully blend family anecdotes with playful segments, creating an engaging listening experience that resonates with a wide audience. Whether sharing golfing mishaps, parenting adventures, or discussing quirky segments like "Was Big D Lying?", the hosts maintain a dynamic and relatable presence throughout the episode.
Listeners are treated to a genuine display of camaraderie and humor, making this episode a standout addition to The Bobby Bones Show lineup. For those who haven't tuned in, this episode offers a perfect blend of humor, personal insights, and entertaining banter that encapsulates the essence of the show.