SORE LOSERS: Ray+Alcohol+Swingers= A Weekend in Charleston

Summary

Podcast Summary: The Bobby Bones Show

Episode: SORE LOSERS: Ray+Alcohol+Swingers = A Weekend in Charleston
Date: May 10, 2026
Hosts: Ray & Joey

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Episode Overview

In this “Sore Losers” edition of The Bobby Bones Show, Ray and Joey recount Ray’s weekend trip to Charleston, South Carolina—a blend of wild travel stories, boozy mishaps, Charleston nightlife (and dress codes), failed celebrity run-ins, and a surprise Kentucky Derby win. Throughout, the episode is packed with the duo’s signature banter, Ray’s questionable luck, and a memorable discussion involving swingers clubs. This episode feels like a hilarious audio travel diary for anyone who appreciates absurd vacation recaps.

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Main Topics & Key Moments

1. Charleston Culture & Dress Codes

[02:12–05:17]

• Ray describes the “fancy,” almost costume-like southern style in Charleston, noting how even young women wear “big flowery dresses” reminiscent of a much older demographic.
  • Quote:
    • Ray: “Think of something that a 55 year old woman wears somewhere there. 30 year old wears it.” (03:20)
    • Joey: “So they all look like frat daddies.” (03:06)
• Strict nightlife dress codes:
  • No hats, shorts, jerseys, sunglasses indoors, or basketball shoes allowed in certain bars.
  • Ray feels out of place in his “Detroit hat”.

2. Nearly Missing the Flight & Travel Disasters

[05:53–12:57]

• Ray and his wife Bazer scramble due to a canceled flight, averted only by Bazer’s habit of checking the flight status manually.
  • Quote:
    • Ray: “She always does the research. She’ll see where the flight comes from. I wouldn’t even know how to log into our savings.” (06:44)
• Joey shares his own story of nearly missing a flight due to underestimating airport crowds and ignoring his wife’s travel wisdom.
• Ray recaps their rushed airport experience, odd luggage logistics, and a struggle with airport security’s lack of bins—paranoia about items vanishing in the conveyor belt.

3. Airport Drinks & Pre-flight Shenanigans

[12:57–20:21]

• The couple arrives early, with time to kill at the NSC Bar (“the Castle”) and then at a wine bar.
• Espresso Martini Debacle:
  • The espresso martini is so vodka-heavy, Bazer refuses to finish.
  • Ray: “Worst espresso we’ve ever had in our life.” (16:46)
  • Bazer: “If you’re any wobbly, they’ll take you right off the flight.” (17:13)
• Entertaining the tale of a drunken man at the gate—the center of attention—yelling about his bag (“You’re not taking my bag!” (18:27)) and nearly getting kicked off the flight, distracting staff from Ray’s own tipsiness.

4. Arriving in Charleston: Airbnb, Missed Food, and Failed Hot Spots

[23:53–29:38]

• Ray and Bazer settle into their Airbnb downtown, weather is perfect, and bachelor/bachelorette themes abound.
• Logistics of their weekend are foiled by small mishaps:
  • Plan to dine at famed “167 Raw” is thwarted by fullness from earlier airport grilled cheese.
  • Their alternate Mexican meal features “ranch water” (tequila & soda), but it’s barely touched due to bad taste.

5. Nightlife Misfires & Celebrity Encounters That Weren’t

[30:07–35:36]

• Sprint across various bars and parties:
  • Attempt to see a secret DJ set by “Maddie Reese” (Southern Hospitality) after tips from Joe Bradley (also from the show), but Bazer gets cold feet, so they skip a potential VIP night.
  • Joey relates with a Vegas anecdote of nearly missing an event due to travel & inebriation.
  • Quote:
    • Ray: “Access to everything, ability to go to nothing.” (34:13)
• General theme of missed opportunities, with a running joke about planning but not achieving.

6. Brunch, Sloppy Service, and More Nashville-in-Charleston

[38:41–44:32]

• Hit a familiar restaurant (“Church and Union”), only to realize it’s a Nashville transplant.
• Mimosas are over-ordered, the waitress is sleep-deprived and disorganized, adding to the slapstick.
• Ray and Bazer repeatedly end up frequenting Nashville chains or institutions while in Charleston (Uncommon James, Husk, etc.).

7. Missed Reality TV Star Encounters

[42:26–44:13]

• Attempt to meet Craig Conover (Southern Charm) at his pillow shop, but are stopped at the door for being over capacity—even as Craig waves at them through the glass.
  • Joey: “You guys have really fumbled the bag this whole weekend.” (43:54)

8. Charleston College Town Vibes & Failed Blue Angels Viewing

[44:32–47:00]

• Trying to day drink with College of Charleston grads, learn about the Blue Angels flyover, fail to see it from the “Tap Room” (which is under renovation).
  • Ray: “Why is this place called Tap Room? There’s no taps.” (46:30)
• The Blue Angels finally fly over—while they nap in the Airbnb.

9. Social Connections, Bar Antics & Swingers Club Revelation

[52:23–59:06]

• Ray describes rain-soaked drinking excursions to Shem Creek and “Reds,” learning the hard way that “seltzer” is not “White Claw” everywhere.
• He meets a woman who shares intel about an infamous, see-through swingers club in Austin, with only one other like it in Denver.
  • Ray (shocked): “She said you go in with a partner…when you’re ready to hook up, you go into these bedrooms that are see through, and people at the bar can see you hook up.” (56:15)
• Joey is both repulsed and fascinated, imagining the “truckers” tuning in might be planning a detour to Austin.

10. Unintentional Public Napping & College Town Chaos

[47:04–49:02]

• Ray gets locked out of Airbnb after a night out, ends up napping on the patio couch—recalls similar stories of friends sleeping on porches.

11. The Surprise Kentucky Derby Win

[62:47–65:45]

• In a twist, Ray drunkenly picks a 23:1 horse (Golden Tempo) to win the Kentucky Derby on a gambling app. They forget all about the bet, app stops working, but upon checking post-trip, they’ve won $500.
  • Ray: “The horse I picked drunk in the airport on vodka espressos, won the Kentucky Derby.” (64:17)
  • Joey: “Finally, you actually did something this weekend…miss after miss after miss, I was just waiting for the sad ending of another miss. But you finally hit.” (65:01)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “Access to everything, ability to go to nothing.” (Ray, 34:13) — The running joke about never pulling the trigger on social or nightlife plans.
• “You’re not taking my bag!” (Ray, impersonating drunk airport guy, 18:27) — Recurring bit that takes tension off Ray’s own inebriation.
• “I want four mimosas before noon. Obviously, we both left some.” (Ray, 39:25) — Theme: Over-ordering, under-consuming.
• “Why is this place called Tap Room? There’s no taps.” (Ray, 46:30)
• “She said you go in with a partner...when you’re ready to hook up, you go into these bedrooms that are see through, and people at the bar can see you hook up.” (Ray, 56:15)
• “Access to VIP, fear of meeting Joe Bradley, and we just go to bed.” (Paraphrase, 33:49–34:13)

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Important Timestamps

• [02:12] – Ray’s initial Charleston impressions & dress code culture
• [05:53] – Flight disaster, “almost missed everything”
• [12:57] – Airport bar, espresso martini disaster
• [18:27] – “You’re not taking my bag!”: drunken gate drama
• [23:53] – Arriving and settling into Charleston Airbnb
• [29:38] – Bad drinks, missed meals, questionable ordering
• [33:31] – Bailing on VIP DJ set with reality stars
• [38:41] – Brunch at Church & Union, mimosas, and waitress craziness
• [43:05] – Failed encounter with Craig Conover
• [46:30] – Laughable “Tap Room” experience
• [52:23] – Shem Creek in the rain—mac & cheese, spicy Bloody Marys
• [56:15] – Swingers club “see-through room” revelation
• [64:04] – Discovering the $500 Kentucky Derby win

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Overall Tone & Style

Playful, self-deprecating, irreverent, and full of the duo’s trademark relatability and banter. The episode thrives on failed plans, near misses, comic mishaps, and the joy of the ridiculous—all with a dash of pop culture, sports, alcohol-fueled chaos, and tongue-in-cheek references to reality TV.

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Takeaways for Non-listeners

• If you enjoy travel stories loaded with comic disaster, near-misses, pop-culture references, and drunken airport antics, this episode delivers.
• It’s less a Charleston travel guide and more a crash course in how not to vacation—but with genuinely funny insights about group dynamics, modern nightlife, and stumbling into luck.
• Don’t expect a deep dive into Charleston’s culture; expect to laugh about whatever can go wrong on a weekend trip, and the camaraderie in reliving it.

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For Future Reference

• Keep your phone charged, check your flights, and don’t expect your Nashville favorites to feel any different out of town.
• Even when you miss every planned event, it's possible—against all odds—to end your trip $500 up.
• And, apparently, if you hear about a “see-through swingers club” in Austin, truckers may soon be flooding the Colorado River.

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End of Summary.

Transcript

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[Joey]

Welcome to Charleston, South Carolina.

[Ray]

All the low country you see a over there is where our quarters are. Those are the plantation A they talk

[Joey]

like that sounds like Ed or Jordan.

[Ray]

No, they're all fancy there.

[Joey]

Oh, welcome to Southern Charm man, they

[Ray]

dress weird there for sure though, I gotta give you that.

[Joey]

They dress up nice, right?

[Ray]

I mean, you wouldn't fit in me. Their hoodies, hats even. Just a night out so women can wear. They can get away with wearing big flowers on a dress. Looks ridiculous there. It's normal. So think of something that a 55 year old woman wears somewhere there. 30 year old wears it.

[Joey]

Huh. Is it a lot of khaki pants for the dudes?

[Ray]

Yep. And polos loafers. Yep.

[Joey]

So they all look like frat daddies.

[Ray]

They do. But then the girls don't necessarily go high skirts. Not that I was looking. They. They're more the florals and like linens.

[Joey]

Huh.

[Ray]

Like the women we were walking behind for like five blocks because they were walking so slow and it's cobblestone. They were wearing big flowery dresses. It was a Thursday night, mind you. And a sweater throw over their shoulders.

[Joey]

Okay.

[Ray]

I mean, we're just rocking jeans and you know, just like a nice shirt

[Joey]

so they know you're not from there.

[Ray]

I mean, it's, it's obvious. And I got the Detroit hat on, you know, I mean, do a lot

[Joey]

of people wear hats or is it more just show. Showing the hair off?

[Ray]

I don't think hats aren't allowed, so I had to show the hair off.

[Joey]

Wow.

[Ray]

Yeah, they, they in, in places you can't wear basketball shoes, you can't wear hats, you can't wear shorts, you can't

[Joey]

wear jerseys, you can't wear like tennis shoes.

[Ray]

Can't wear. Do rags. You can't wear basketball shoes. Shoes you actually play basketball in.

[Joey]

So I couldn't wear Jordans.

[Ray]

No, you can wear.

[Joey]

They're like dressy cool. I mean, I don't have any, but I know people wear them with outfits like as a nice cool shoe.

[Ray]

Yeah, not that. No sunglasses indoors. They're just trying to keep out. I don't know. I do. I don't think I saw a cop in four days. They're just trying to keep out people getting mad at each other and maybe somebody's offended by a hat or something.

[Joey]

Oh, yeah, those shoes, man. You wearing those shoes? Why are you wearing those shoes? Those shoes are ugly. Let's go outside. Oh, I totally get why they keep them out.

[Ray]

Like, oh, is that Timberwolves? No, it's spurs, man. It should be Timberwolves.

[Joey]

Unnecessary, Unnecessary. Shot taken. I mean, we're talking about Charleston. We're not talking about how I stayed up till 11:30 on Monday night because I was so excited to watch the spurs for us to only lose by two. Champagne. And I still don't believe his name is Champagne. It's got to be Champagne.

[Ray]

Well, it's Champagne, Vassal, Castle and Wemby.

[Joey]

Yeah, but I mean, unbelievable. He has a three to win it at the buzzer. We missed. I love the no timeout call, but let's go back to Charleston. We don't want to talk about the spurs losing. That'll bore everybody to death. I want to talk about. You said no short skirts. Well, when we were at the golf course on Sunday, we were making the turn at number nine, there was a girl and my brother goes, batter's box goes, whoa. I said, what? And he goes, and that skirt, a little short. And I said, oh, man, I didn't notice. So he was looking. I wasn't. But yeah, it was a short skirt. Tall, tall, good looking girl. Nice long legs, very toned.

[Ray]

Battery box. When was the last time you got let out of the cage? Come on, dude.

[Joey]

It looked like it was the first time he's been out of the cage in months.

[Ray]

Now they're above the kneecaps. Let's be real.

[Joey]

Yeah, I mean, when he was, you know, when he was in his a day they wore him down mid shin. That's what he kind of likes.

[Ray]

But we almost missed the flight. We almost missed everything. Whoa. Yeah. So I already said about the Uber driver. You guys can listen to the last podcast. I don't give a rip. But Baser hits me up and I said. And she says, hey, our flights cancel. It's like going, we're not going to fly in tonight. It may land at midnight. Or we may be spirit. And my name's Bennett. My name in it. My name's canceled. I'm lanceled.

[Joey]

Wow.

[Ray]

So she goes, hey, let's move our flight up. We take a midday red eye and we leave at 2 in the afternoon. I'm not showered, shaven, throwing clothes in a suitcase. And we go to the airport. And she looked it up. She randomly got no notification. She looked it up our flight and it said, pretty much canceled. Sorry. Weather from another city. It's coming from.

[Joey]

Oh, that would have sucked. Dude.

[Ray]

Dude. She had randomly thought, why not just pull up the app and do some. She always does the research. She'll see where the flight comes from.

[Joey]

Smart. I never do that. I don't even know how to look up where the flight comes from.

[Ray]

Really don't either. Maybe one day I'll learn. You know, when you're married, she knows stuff. She knows Uber. I've Never used the app. She knows UberEats. I wouldn't even know how to order UberEats. She knows logging into some of our financial stuff. I wouldn't even know how to log into our savings.

[Joey]

Yeah, it's like my wife, when we were going to Puerto Rico, and she was like, listen, we had like a 6am flight, and she was like, we need to get there so early because business travelers, that's when they travel. And it is going to be jam packed at the airport.

[Ray]

Oh, 5:59.

[Joey]

And I hear you. You are so ridiculous. I'm not getting to the airport two hours early. It is not going to be that busy. Like, she was like, I travel for business. I am telling you, 6am is the most popular flight for business travelers. It's going to be jam packed. Did I listen to her? Hell no, I didn't listen to her. We got it my way.

[Ray]

I'm a businessman, make a business deal, trying to get money, and we show

[Joey]

up at the airport at like five o' clock and, oh, my God, the TSA line was out the door. And I was like, oh, my gosh. What?

[Ray]

They got a fricking business district in Puerto Rico?

[Joey]

And I was like, well, no, they're going to wherever they're going, but to get through security, you got to get to the plane. And I felt so dumb. I was like, we're going to miss a flight. I had to talk people in the line, hey, you mind if we cut? You mind if we cut?

[Ray]

Hola, amigo.

[Joey]

No, no. We weren't in Puerto Rico. We were in America.

[Ray]

They're part of a territory, okay? And they speak English.

[Joey]

I had to cut my way to the front of the line and look. And then our plane was delayed, but, man, it was cutting it close. If it wasn't delayed, we might have missed it. And I looked at her and I said, I am sorry. I should listen to you when it comes to flying. My apologies.

[Ray]

That is the worst when you miss a plane. Been there before. And it's when you're too cocky and you don't leave in enough time.

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Ray]

And you got to call the parents and be like, oh, they canceled my flight. That was back in the day before you could look it up.

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Ray]

If I was coming home for college. Miss a flight, Crazy. It's delayed four hours. Slash, I slept in, had no idea I was gonna need to get to the airport three hours early.

[Joey]

All right, now let's go.

[Ray]

Yeah.

[Joey]

So you get on the plane.

[Ray]

We're not leaving the airport. This whole little this out whole episode.

[Joey]

Whoa.

[Ray]

I'm kidding. Just this segment.

[Joey]

Okay.

[Ray]

But we're at the airport and so we're. We're drinking.

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Ray]

I take a roadie. We roll up into.

[Joey]

Where are you drinking at like, what, what restaurant? What are you eating your vino. Vino thing?

[Ray]

We'll tell you. But I took a roadie. So we're heading to the airport, Bays are driving and get out at VIP. It's like $5 more. Don't even start with me. And there's people rolling in. It's a Thursday in Nashville. I got the can in the car. Throw it in the trash can. They're like, whoa, I want to be part of their group. And so then the bags. Bazer's back of a trunk of her vehicle doesn't work. So the. We're in VIP and the bags are in the back seat. And I'm jerking them out because Baser had to bring an extra large for three days. And I mean, so we look like we're wealthy at first. And then I'm jerking the bags out real quick. We look like country bumpkins.

[Joey]

Oh, you want me to get down to your trunk for you? No, sorry. They're in the backseat. We don't. The trunk doesn't open. Sorry about that, sir. Okay.

[Ray]

The guy literally looked at me like I was an idiot. He's like, what? Your bags aren't in the trunk? Do you. You have a trunk, though? And I'm like, no, it's easier back here ripping them out the back seat. I'm already half lit. And so then we get into the airport. Don't go there in a month because they're closing the whole entrance to redo the escalators because it's so backed up and backlogged.

[Joey]

Really?

[Ray]

Yeah. So in June, don't even go to the airport?

[Joey]

Well, they need to have. I'm going to tell you what they need to do at the airport. They have it all screwed up. They only have one escalator system and it's right in the middle. So you have to walk all the way down or over to get back to the escalator. Then if you ride a shuttle to one of the parking lots, they only have one pickup and one drop off location. So if you're on carousel one, when you get your bags, you got to walk back to Carousel 8 to get on the shuttle. They should have shuttle stops. More than one. It's unbelievably inefficient. Then curbside check in. So I did curbside check in. Because I didn't want to lug the golf clubs all the way across the airport. Right, right. It's $35 or whatever or $45 for your first bag. Well, if you do curbside check in, it's $48. Why is it $3 more to check it in at the Curb?

[Ray]

Wait, that's $13 more. Are you enumerate.

[Joey]

No, no, I said. I don't.

[Ray]

I don't remember. It was 35 or 45, because $13 is actually significant.

[Joey]

Thirteen is a lot. But I'm saying it's either 35 or 45. And then they charge you 38 or 48 because it's curbside check in. He goes, hey, man, it's $3 more. Do it out here. I was like, what? He goes, do you still want to do it? It's $3 more. And listen, I'm a penny pincher, but I'm already there. I'm already committed, and so I'm not going to go wait in another line for three more dollars my time. I need to get through security. But I just don't even understand why they upcharge you $3 to. To check it at the curb. Pretty frustrating.

[Ray]

Yeah, that. I mean, that'll curb your appetite. Hey, yo. But anyway, so you're drinking appetite. So we are. We're parked at VIP and we are heading in.

[Joey]

Go for it.

[Ray]

And we're. We're already feeling great. And we get. It was quick, I believe. I don't think there was a wait at. No. Yeah. So it was kind of rushed, but once we got there, we realized we had two and a half hours.

[Joey]

Of course you did. Of course you did. Why would I be. Why would I be surprised that you have two and a half hours before your flight?

[Ray]

And I don't know if it was Nashville or Charleston, but I'm pretty sure that we didn't have bins. And people are just throwing their. On the belt. I had my wallet, and I go, can I get something to put it in so it doesn't get caught in between the Spitties? Bazer's got a coach. He's just throwing on the rack. I mean, the suit or the backpack, which she had. Makes sense. That can go on a roller. But my phone. Hi, there. Can I get a bucket for my. People are putting their phones on the rollers. They've lost their damn minds. There was little buckets, but there was only enough trays for like, five people. And I'm like, so you tell me, like, my chapstick isn't gonna roll out, you know, like, my jimmies aren't gonna just fall into the belts. Like, where's my bin?

[Joey]

Yeah, that's a great question. I don't know why? And they make you put everything in the bin. Like, why do I need to put my backpack in a bin? My backpack rolls just fine on the conveyor belt, but I have to put it in a bin. Make it make sense to me. I can't make it make sense to me that people don't know what they're doing with their job. Because originally on my flight to Austin, I was on a non direct flight because I didn't know what time we were going to get done with work. And I didn't want to miss the flight. And then I find out we're getting done early. So I call. They're like, oh, sorry, we can't change you because it was made by a travel agency. And so until the day of, we cannot change you. You can do day of change. I'm all right. So I call at midnight. I stayed up till midnight so I could be the first one. I call. Like, oh, yeah, okay, let me see. Yeah, travel agent. I'm not seeing how we can change your flight. You'll just have to get on standby. We'll put you on standby. Okay, cool, cool. So then we get done with work and I'm driving to the airport.

[Ray]

I told you we weren't leaving the airport. This segment.

[Joey]

And I, I call.

[Ray]

You're now in a random airport. Airport. Are you in?

[Joey]

This is going to. This is going to the Nashville airport.

[Ray]

This is Puerto Rico again.

[Joey]

No.

[Ray]

Hey. I say, hey, no.

[Joey]

And I say, I call the airline again. And the lady's like, why did you put yourself on standby? Why didn't you just change your flight? I said, the lady said I couldn't change my flight. She goes, oh, honey, let me take care of that for you. Okay, you are now on the earlier flight and you have a window seat. Have a great day. It's like, how, how is it so like, I call one time and the person's like, oh, no, can't change. You don't know how to do it. Gotta put you on standby. Call five hours later. Hey, no problem. Got you on the flight. Flight switched. Thanks a lot. Back to your story.

[Ray]

Pro tip Bazer said, call. And that's how she was able.

[Joey]

Always call.

[Ray]

That's how she was able to switch the flight so easily. And now, no upcharge. It was free.

[Joey]

I was saying mine.

[Ray]

And so we get There and head to the castle. Did you know that the Nashville airport has a NSC bar?

[Joey]

Yeah, it's on the left hand side when you're going through D gates.

[Ray]

So we went to the castle.

[Joey]

That's what I'm talking about, dude.

[Ray]

We started looking at the menu, okay. And we looked at it some more. They didn't come up to us for 25 minutes. So I went up to the bar and got the food and the drinks. So the castle, there's some issue with the moat. They're not able to get to us or something like that. And so I go, hi there. I'll get a. I got a claw. And she got a mimosa. And then I go, I need the grilled cheese. I'm dying. And the lady's like, oh, did your server not come at you? No, no. We've only been here, like, I don't know, 25 minutes. Nope, I haven't seen anybody.

[Joey]

But don't worry, we still got two hours of our flight. We're here in plenty of time.

[Ray]

Luckily, we are good on that. And there's dudes in front of us. They're doing a business meeting. Just pounding the drinks on a Thursday. What architecture company do y' all work for? Because those plans are going to be a little bit blurry. I don't know about the measurements on that one.

[Joey]

May have been a little off balance on that building. Maybe lean into the right, if you know what I mean.

[Ray]

Is that skyscraper in Nashville? Because I'm avoiding that road. But we're just. Dude, we're watching highlights. They got big TVs in there. And it literally is a castle.

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Ray]

And there's like a Mexican food truck right across the way.

[Joey]

Yeah, it's not good.

[Ray]

Oh, didn't do it.

[Joey]

I did it one time.

[Ray]

And so I said to baser, I go, hey, there's your little wine bar or whatever over there. I said, let's do it for you. Let's do it for you. We're done here. We got 30 minutes left. I'm getting to the good part, guys. I'm just setting the table right now. And so we go to the wine bar and get the two espressos. And lady goes, oh, you're going to love these. You're going to love these espressos. Here you go. What I'll do is I'll make them all together and just pour them into two cups for y', all. Y' all to go. Or here. And we're like, oh, to go. And then we'll just Roll up to the gate with them. And she's like, absolutely. Makes them. Worst espresso we've ever had in our life, I think.

[Joey]

Espresso martinis. Yes.

[Ray]

She put half of a bottle of. I. I don't even know Tito's in it. Baser couldn't even drink hers.

[Joey]

Whoa.

[Ray]

So I finished mine back in, let's say, 20 minutes. Bazer still got almost a full cup. She's like, I can't drink this.

[Joey]

It tastes terrible. What are we going to do with this?

[Ray]

And we were still in the phase of, let's not waste alcohol. That changed in three days. But I go, well, let me just drink yours. And she goes, no, no, you won't be good to fly.

[Joey]

Oh, that would be bad.

[Ray]

You will not be good to fly. She's like, if you're any wobbly, they'll take you right off the flight, I'm telling you. Well, I was trumped by the guy over here. This guy is absolutely housed. Oh, and he just met a chick. So they met at the bar, and they walk up to the gate, and we're all going to Charleston together.

[Joey]

Love it.

[Ray]

The girl looks like. I wish I. She looks like Eddie's wife.

[Joey]

Great description, man.

[Ray]

It's not gonna help people at home.

[Joey]

No, it's really not. And I don't know who that guy is, but I'm sure he has a fine wife.

[Ray]

And she just met this guy, and the guy looks like. Do you know the guy that murdered the girl in the van when they went across the country? Yeah, he looks identical to that guy. Gabby Petito. Yeah, he looks like the Gabby Patito guy.

[Joey]

Is his name Brian something?

[Ray]

Don't remember his name. Only remember hers. Rest in peace.

[Joey]

Yeah, that guy, he's dead.

[Ray]

He can be eaten by alligators. And so he's in line laundry.

[Joey]

Yes.

[Ray]

He's in line with the lady that looks like the wife. Okay.

[Joey]

Okay.

[Ray]

And the people at the baggage claim go, hey, we need 12 people to hand over their bags. 12 people, or we're going to just start coming and taking bags. He is yelling this loud. I gotta step away. So this is.

[Joey]

You get.

[Ray]

You're not taking my bag.

[Joey]

Oh.

[Ray]

And it was funny. Half of a time, he did it three or four times. I said, you're not taking my bag.

[Joey]

Oh.

[Ray]

And I was like, bazer, we don't gotta worry about me being too drunk. I think he just took all the attention. And so we've already passed the point of not being fun anymore. Nope, you're not taking my bag. We Are gonna need to take people's bag. I said, you're not taking it. I don't know how this guy made it on the plane, but the lady and him separated. They had met each other, and it

[Joey]

broke up real quick.

[Ray]

At first, she was laughing, but then it was. It got to the point where people are like, it's security. Like, is somebody gonna get this guy off the flight? He made it on.

[Joey]

Good.

[Ray]

Not dragging my bag.

[Joey]

It was.

[Ray]

I'm like, bazer, is that what I look like when I'm drunk? But obviously, I'm starting to feel it a little bit. I'm like. They're like, we will be taking your bags. I'm like, you're not. Oh, I can't yell.

[Joey]

We will not go. We're not leaving.

[Ray]

You're not taking it.

[Joey]

We're not leaving.

[Ray]

I think he did hit him with one of those. You're not taking it. He hit him with one of those. And I'm like, kind of laughing a little bit, but luckily took the attention off me.

[Joey]

Good.

[Ray]

So I was fine. I put down half a bottle of Tito's in that espresso. I was good to board.

[Joey]

Good.

[Ray]

He asked for my pass. I pull up my id. I reach in the other pocket, hand in my cell phone. He's like, I don't need to look at your Instagram. Where's your ticket? It's a good start, but we get

[Joey]

on windows or aisle. What do we sit?

[Ray]

Bays are always. Screws me. So I was in the middle. She's in the window.

[Joey]

That's brutal. Yeah.

[Ray]

So we're flying. We're gone.

[Joey]

Off to Charleston.

[Ray]

Off to Charleston. I'm in bed. I woke up. The flight's 20 minutes. I woke up 20 minutes later.

[Joey]

And you touched down. Everything's beautiful.

[Ray]

Couldn't tell you anything that happened on the plane. Baser took an Instagram. I can put it on ours. That she did, but other than that. Don't remember the flight out like a light. Slept the whole time.

[Joey]

Love it. Love it. And you know, how's the weather in Charleston? You look out the window, Is it night? Is it sunny? Is it raining? What are we doing?

[Ray]

Perfect. The sun is setting. We made it just in time.

[Joey]

I can't wait to hear what happens in Charleston. We'll be right back after this.

[Ray]

You're not taking it.

[Joey]

We're not leaving.

[T-Mobile Network Promoter]

We're lost. And kickoff's coming up. I don't want to miss the lineup. I'm gonna ask that man for directions. Hi there. We're trying to get to the stadium.

Well you're going to take a left at the old oak tree at this here right road. Nah, I'm just kidding. Let me get my phone out.

How is there signal out here?

T Mobile and US Cellular are coming together so the network out here is huge. We get the same great signal as the city, saving a boatload with benefits. And there's a five year price guarantee too. Okay, here's the turn.

Actually, can you pull up the way to a T Mobile store?

[T-Mobile Advertiser]

America's best network just got bigger. Switch to T Mobile today and get built in benefits the other guys leave out plus our five year price guarantee. And now T Mobile is available at US Cellular stores in Hermiston Best Mobile Network Based on analysis by Ookloaf Speed test intelligence data second half of 2025 bigger network the combination of T Mobile's and US Cellular's network footprints will enhance the T Mobile network's coverage price guarantee on talk text and data exclusions like taxes and fees apply. See t mobile.com for details.

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[Joey]

So we're in Charleston. Welcome to Charleston.

[Ray]

It is beautiful. Sun going down.

[Joey]

Yep.

[Ray]

We're picking back up right where we left off, which was what in the Uber and the sunset.

[Joey]

You get out and they hand you a lay and they say, welcome to Charleston.

[Ray]

Not a lot of. Not a lot of traffic on the road. We got right to our Airbnb downtown. So it was quick. Love it. And I believe the bachelorette parties were still waiting. They had all their stuff on. They flowers. I mean, it was basically. They were wearing daffodils. I mean, it was ridiculous because I don't think they really have a. Where do I put my arms in Nashville? Cowboy hats, boots in Charleston. I don't know if they really know how to do.

[Joey]

Yeah, there's not a theme.

[Ray]

Yeah, that's what I'm saying. So it's. Do we really dress up? Do we. Is it satire? Are we going to overdo it? Who knows? But that's not what I'm talking about. So back to the Airbnb. We're getting there now.

[Joey]

Yeah, we're there.

[Ray]

And this is one that's not going to flood. So we're not worried about sandbags like last time we looked. It's above ground.

[Joey]

It's.

[Ray]

You got to check that when you're near sea level. New Orleans apparently is going to flood in the next hundred years.

[Joey]

Wow.

[Ray]

Could also be there as well. O. And we stopped at Walgreens. That's where we got the 24 pack of beer. We're getting wine, we're getting energy drinks, maybe some chips. We got a frozen pizza that we'll never make. Stuff like that.

[Joey]

Okay. And.

[Ray]

But we're at the Airbnb and we said, hey, we got to go to. We want to go to this restaurant. 1, 6 7, raw 67 that. But it was before that was popular.

[Joey]

Okay.

[Ray]

But then I realized I had that grilled cheese at the airport, and I was like, I'm not even really that hungry for that. Let's just walk around.

[Joey]

Okay.

[Ray]

Okay. So we're bouncing around.

[Joey]

So you're going to go to this nice restaurant with oysters and whatever. Because I am assuming 167 raw means seafood, and you are going to pass it up because you had a grilled cheese and just let me get it straight. Yeah, got it. Go ahead.

[Ray]

I guess there's really no payoff for 167 raw. But we talked about it the entire weekend, and we never went once. I just heard people from Laguna beach talk about it, so I want to do it.

[Joey]

So you'd never been there?

[Ray]

Never. Never went, and still haven't been great.

[Joey]

So Ray's review of 167 RAW is. They talked about it on Laguna Beach. It looked awesome. But the grilled cheese at the airport. So much better.

[Ray]

And we go. We see this place called El Jefe. Oh, Mexican spot. Why not? When we're coastal, why not go Mexican?

[Joey]

I love that idea.

[Ray]

You can take the boy out of Mexico. You can't take the Mexico out of the boy.

[Joey]

That's right.

[Ray]

And we get in there, and we get chips in quesadilla bays are. Never seen her order that. She gets a ranch water, which is like milk and tequila.

[Joey]

Whoa.

[Ray]

Yeah. And it was a fountain drink of it.

[Joey]

Dude. There was a guy at one of the parties. It was a party on a Friday night, and there was people just walking around with margaritas, and it looked like Topo Chico's on. On a. What do you. Server tray.

[Ray]

Yeah.

[Joey]

And the guy goes, oh, man. Yes. I love Topo Chico. Grabs one. What the hell is this? Oh, my God. It's a ranch water. I haven't had a drink in 10 years. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

[Ray]

Oh, that's not funny.

[Joey]

No, it's not funny.

[Ray]

He lost his sobriety.

[Joey]

He's like that. No. Oh, my. Get this away from me. He hadn't had a drink in 10 years.

[Ray]

See, he spit it all out, though. He's good.

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Ray]

I think we're gonna say he's good.

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Ray]

I don't know.

[Joey]

I didn't. I didn't keep up with him the rest of the night. I felt awkward being in the circle when he was like. He took a drink, and he's like, oh, man. What? And it. Because it does look like a water. Yeah, it does look like a Topo Chico. Because it's just they. They should say something because it Had a napkin wrapped around the bottom so you couldn't see the label. And he just saw it and thought, oh, man. One of those sparkling waters or whatever you call it, fizzy waters. And he took a big old swig. Oh, man. Oh, what the. What, man? That. Oh, that's terrible, man. I haven't had a drink in 10 years. And he goes and grabs a water, dying of thirst.

[Ray]

Poor guy. Oh, get the man of Dasani Aquafina.

[Joey]

Get him something. I mean, it was like. I don't know, baser.

[Ray]

Had the same reaction. It was terrible. She drank maybe a drink of this $25 drink, and that was it. Yeah, but we don't do a thing, like we're in college, where you have to drink what you order.

[Joey]

No, no, you do, because you just did it at the airport. You just. 20 minutes ago when you were at the airport, you said we were still in the phase of can't waste alcohol.

[Ray]

No, it's already changed, though.

[Joey]

But it's now changed. Once we get to Charleston, it's a whole dude ball game.

[Ray]

And so I was still kind of holding out for 167 raw. I was like, you know what? Maybe we're gonna go there a little bit later. Foreshadowing. You guys know, we already don't go there. So I didn't eat. I ate no chips or anything. So I eaten. Yeah, I. Cause I will say I wanted to be starving for my lobster roll.

[Joey]

So you went to the Mexican restaurant because you're like, oh, man, when you're going coastal mine, you met the Mexican drinks.

[Ray]

Correct. And so obviously, what are you gonna order there? I got a claw. I said, klaw me a claw. It had a huge tv we're watching. I believe that was the night the knicks were up 90 points.

[Joey]

Yeah, that would have been 90 points up Nick's. But here's the question. You went to the Mexican restaurant because when you're on the coast, why not go coast Coastal. And you went, true Mexican. And you got a white claw.

[Ray]

Yeah, I'm not a tequila guy.

[Joey]

What the.

[Ray]

That's what I'm telling.

[Joey]

So it didn't matter what restaurant you went to. You were going to get a claw.

[Ray]

Mistakes were made.

[Joey]

Like, you built it up like you were going to this Mexican restaurant for a Mexican martini, a margarita, something. A case of dilla. And no, you went because they have white claw. Huh? Bartender, Mexico bartender.

[Ray]

Good guy. He said he's a football coach and a bartender, works seven days a week. And as we're taking a four day Week out.

[Joey]

I'm out.

[Ray]

Yeah. I felt kind of guilty. Oh, yeah, we're working too. We're here on business. I told him we'd be back. Never were. So then we hit the streets.

[Joey]

He's been waiting for. He's like, man, where are those cool people that we met?

[Ray]

So we still had a little bit of time. She had been talking to who? What's the guy? I'm going to name guys from these shows. You're not going to know them.

[Joey]

Nope, I'm not. Because I don't watch Southern Charm, but I want to hear them.

[Ray]

So Jesse Solomon, he's a singer guy. He had a show. We were never going to make it, just with the flight. But afterwards she was talking to Joe Bradley. Oh, and he's from Southern hospitality. And he goes, yeah, after, there's a secret set. Matty Reese, his girlfriend, also on the show and is going to be playing this DJ set at Audio Live. And so we knew we were never going to make the concert. So we walk past Audio Live to go get some drinks at a place called Uptown. It's pretty popular.

[Joey]

Yeah, Uptown Funk going to give it to you.

[Ray]

I don't know why it's called Uptown. It's not really Uptown. It's just the name of it. But there's nothing but 20 year olds in there. Girls are wearing nothing. Guys. I mean, they all look like they just did a elephant walk.

[Joey]

Sounds like you need to go to Uptown, man.

[Ray]

No, no, no. We did one drink in Baildon.

[Joey]

Okay.

[Ray]

And after, after that we then walk past again, Audio Live. And it had been like 20, 30 minutes and the line is out the door and we were checking it and we're like, oh, that must mean the pop up show is gonna start. It's ending. People were coming out. I mean, so you thought there were 20 somethings in uptown. Wait till this show at Audio Live. For Jesse Solomon.

[Joey]

It was.

[Ray]

I was flooded by 18 year olds.

[Joey]

Okay?

[Ray]

I'm, I'm. I'm like a 40 year old guy with a cane on the street.

[Joey]

Boom.

[Ray]

Stomach, shirt. Boom. Boobs hanging out. Boom. Spray tan. Boom. Real tan. Boom. Get out of my way. Oh, boom. I'm gonna. I'm divorcing. Or no, I don't want to date you anymore.

[Joey]

Hey, get back here.

[Ray]

I love you. No. You're mean to me and my girlfriends. Where's my vape?

[Joey]

Hey.

[Ray]

I come back to the frat house, it was nuts. There was a flood of sororities in France, dude.

[Joey]

The fights out at bars or whatever, like walking after the I Heart Country Festival that Saturday, walking by a couple and she's a little bit in front of him. That's the rudest thing you've ever done to me. That is the rudest thing you've ever done to me. He's like, ok, ok. I mean, wow, I love it. I mean, I don't know how you get in a fight at a concert. Like, a concert is supposed to be a fun time with your significant other, whatever, but to get in a fight at a concert, you have to be drinking a lot. That's the most disrespectful thing you've ever done to me. The rudest thing. And he was just like, okay. He had his hands in his pocket. He was kind of walking meekly, like with his head down. And she's storming. Got the. Almost looked like had tears in her eyes. And it was rough. But go ahead, continue. You're reminding me of little things that I totally forgot about.

[Ray]

Rock and roll, dude. I don't give a crap. And also, a good little joke is if a couple gets in a fight and it's not a concert, but if it's a boxing or UFC event, then you can always just say, oh, I didn't know you guys were the main card a when you can use truckers. I know you guys don't got a lot to go with, but you're welcome. The the audio live place the line. So I go up to the bouncer as I'm about to tap him and say, hey, Jesse, Salman get it. His show just ended. We know Joe Bradley. He's been DMing with my wife. And Joe Bradley knows Maddie Reese. He's dating her. We want to go see her secret set. Nobody knows about it, but we do. So you can just, like, get me through the line as I'm going to touch his arm. Baser gets gunshot and goes, oh, my gosh, no, no, I don't want to even go to the DJ set anymore. I don't know. I'm embarrassed. I don't know. Let's just go.

[Joey]

What?

[Ray]

We would have had vip. I would have been on the stacks of wax.

[Joey]

What are we embarrassed about?

[Ray]

I guess she just had, like, she

[Joey]

was nervous about meeting Joe Bradley in person.

[Ray]

She has never met him in person.

[Joey]

Oh, man. And she's worried that she's been DMing with him, but is he going to live up to the hype?

[Ray]

And so, being the understanding husband that I am, I just said, okay, let's go. And so we were off and back to bed. That was it.

[Joey]

What?

[Ray]

It was an early night.

[Joey]

So you had access to the party of the century at up at Live with Joe Bradley and Jesse Solomon, and you. You opted for bed because your wife was embarrassed.

[Ray]

Access to everything, ability to go to nothing.

[Joey]

Dude, that's like. When I was in Vegas with my wife one time, and we had tickets. She was working, and so we had tickets to maybe the Black Crows. I don't even know who they are. And she got really drunk at the blackjack table. I was like, I got to go to bed. And I was like, the hell you are. The hell you are. Come on, we got to go. You're not that drunk. I can't go. I can't go. And I'm like, well, I'm going by myself. Why did I care? Don't even know who the band is.

[Ray]

It's just the point of it. It was on the agenda.

[Joey]

It was on the agenda, man. We had tickets, and I was like, I'm going. I'm going. And I tried to go by myself, and I almost got arrested because the tickets that will call were under her name. I had her I.D. they questioned me about, oh, did you mug her in the parking lot and steal her id? And I'm like, how would I know she had tickets to the Black Crows? Like, if I mugged her in the parking lot, how would I know she was coming here?

[Ray]

I'm gonna be the father of her children in 10 years.

[Joey]

And so then I just tried to walk right in without tickets, and they busted me.

[Ray]

That's one of my favorite stories.

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Ray]

You trying to get into a black girl show?

[Joey]

Yeah, but go ahead. So you go to bed.

[Ray]

Yeah, we went tonight.

[Joey]

Good night.

[Ray]

Yeah, yeah. Next day we're up, and we go to.

[Joey]

What time are you up on a Saturday or Friday?

[Ray]

I was up at 7am okay. Yeah, I had to check in. I had to do some stuff with the old big show and what we.

[Joey]

Let's take a break. We'll be right back.

[T-Mobile Network Promoter]

All right, we're lost, and kickoff's coming up. I don't want to miss the lineup. I'm going to ask that man for directions. Hi there. We're trying to get to the stadium.

Well, you're going to take a left at the old oak tree at this here road. Nah, I'm just kidding. Let me get my phone out.

How is their signal out here?

T Mobile and US Cellular are coming together, so the network out here is huge. We get the same great signal as the city, saving a boatload with benefits and there's a five year price guarantee too. Okay, here's the turn.

Actually, can you pull up the way to a T Mobile store?

[T-Mobile Advertiser]

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[Public Investing Advertiser]

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[Ray]

and we decide to go to church and union. I want to say, oh, just like here.

[Joey]

They have a Church street.

[Ray]

No, no. We have the exact same restaurant here.

[Joey]

Oh, my God. Oh, my gosh.

[Ray]

But it's cool.

[Joey]

No, no, no, it is. No, no, no. You went to a different city to just go to the same restaurants you have here. Do you see the problem with that?

[Ray]

Whatever.

[Joey]

Okay. You do you. Why? Why do I care? But it's like you have a Ruth Chris steakhouse and then you go to another town. Oh, let's go to Ruth Chris. What? You have that in your own town. Why not try something else? Go ahead.

[Ray]

And we get a flight of mimosas. I didn't know it meant you're about to drink four mimosas. Obviously we each both left some.

[Joey]

Here we go. We're wasting alcohol this whole trip. I think the theme of the trip is not doing anything and wasting alcohol. Go ahead.

[Ray]

I don't want four mimosas before noon. Because Baser got us some 10am brunch, which was good. We didn't have to wait in line.

[Joey]

Yeah, that's nice. It's always good to have a plan.

[Ray]

Hostess. Interesting. Never looked at us. The waitress fumbled on her words left and right. She'd be like, oh, here you go. Here's your mustard. I'm sorry, I mean ketchup. Here you go. Your fights are almost. Flights are almost here. Are you guys having a good day? I mean, day. She was all over the place with her words. I was like, did you go out to El Jefe last night? Because girl was drinking last night. I mean, she was had the riddled with anxiety in her. In her arms when she was handing us stuff.

[Joey]

I think she had the. She had the VIP access with Jesse Solomon and Jack Bradley the night before. And she was probably on the wax of stacks. You would have met her VIP if you would have stayed at the party. That's like our waitress at Waterloo on sun Sunday with the whole family. She was all over the place. We ordered two orders of chips and dip. One for the adults, one for the kids. We ordered fried pickles and she brings out a bucket of fried mushrooms.

[Ray]

Different.

[Joey]

We didn't order that. And then someone dropped the chips and Dip off, but only one serving of it. Then my mom ordered a diet. A Coke, and she brought her a Diet Coke batter's box and wanted unsweet tea. Got sweet tea. I mean, she was all over the place. My dad tried to order a sandwich, and they have a little automatic thing, like a computer hand in their hand, like an iPad. She goes, I can't find that anywhere on the menu. I'm going to go ask my colleague.

[Ray]

And so just hit search.

[Joey]

She was all over the place. Thank you for reminding me.

[Ray]

Back to Charleston, the brunch was fine. Then we're going to just hit the streets, which. It's great for that cobblestone. So many shops and restaurants. You'll never go to all of them in your entire lifetime.

[Amazon Advertiser]

Really?

[Ray]

Yeah, that's.

[Joey]

It's.

[Ray]

That's what I kind of forgot about. And so I was taking pictures next to the funny ones. Like, she would walk past a Gucci store, and I'd take a picture. She'd walk past Dolce and Gabbana, take a picture, you know?

[Joey]

Yeah, the nice one.

[Ray]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Joey]

I got a question. Call me stupid. Is Charleston. Do they have a beach?

[Ray]

Yeah, they do, but you got to go to this Sullivan's island place.

[Joey]

Got it.

[Ray]

So where we were at in what

[Joey]

it's called the Mainland.

[Ray]

Mainland. It's. There's no beach there. You can kind of, like, go on the edge and see it, but there's no beach. Kind of like Key West.

[Joey]

Got it.

[Ray]

But so we're just doing the shopping thing. We go to Uncommon James, which is Christian Kristen Cavallari's place.

[Joey]

So wait, you've been to 12th and Union in a church, which is here. Yes, Uncommon James, which is here. Which is here. So you basically went there to do Nashville things, and then we went to

[Ray]

the Apple store because I needed a charger.

[Joey]

Oh, my gosh.

[Ray]

And then. Yeah, but here's the deal. Here's the funny part. We go past this one place. It's called Sewing Down South. It's from the show Southern Charm.

[Joey]

Love it.

[Ray]

The celebrity dude, Craig Conover, is in there, and he. He literally follows me on Instagram. He DMS with baser. He's been on Amy's podcast from the big show.

[Joey]

Okay.

[Ray]

And so he's doing a pillow show where he just, like, signs people's pillows. I don't know what he does. He's, like, a designer. And there's a line, 50 women in there, and the doors wide open. So I'm like, well, this dude freaking follows me on Instagram. Let's go. This is awesome. We've never met him. Love the show. I. The door's slightly open. I go to push the door open. Remember, I'm like, two flights deep. I'm a Moses.

[Joey]

Correct.

[Ray]

Push it open pretty forcibly. And this lady pushes it back and goes, well, I'm sorry, we are at capacity. You're not coming in. We are closed. Oh, I'm sorry. The door was open. I mean, Craig is literally smiling at us, waving. And she goes, we are at capacity. We are just about to be closed. No more people can come in. I'm sorry. Sorry the door was open. It's not like I broke in. Okay, bye. So we missed another interaction with somebody, a reality star.

[Joey]

Wait, you didn't go, hey, Craig, what's up, dude? Can you get me in? You didn't, like, wave, hey, Craig, come over here real quick.

[Ray]

He's waving behind the glass. Then we scurried off. Maybe Bazer a gun shy again.

[Joey]

Oh, my. You guys have really fumbled the bag this whole weekend. So far. We've had a chance to meet Jack Daugherty and Jesse Solomon. And now we had a chance to meet Craig Hanover. What's his name?

[Ray]

Craig Conover.

[Joey]

Craig Conover. And we have not met any of them.

[Ray]

So we go back to uptown, which we had been to the previous day. It's a good spot. And we talked to the waitress. She's nice. I had one of the worst watered down Red Bull vodka slushies I've ever had in my entire life. I couldn't finish it fast enough. I didn't. I finished it half the way and then got a claw.

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Ray]

And so baser's talking to her. I bounce upstairs. I talked to, like, some cool bartender, and three frat daddies are just getting day drunk on a Friday. Had a great conversation with him. Talking about, apparently it was College of Charleston weekend.

[Joey]

Oh, yeah.

[Ray]

So that's why our Airbnb was kind of expensive. All families were in town.

[Joey]

I think they were all graduating.

[Ray]

They were?

[Joey]

Ye. Yeah. But dude, wait, there's a college in Charles. That's a pretty cool college.

[Ray]

That's. It Might be tops in the country.

[Joey]

Wow.

[Ray]

Oh, yeah. It's right there, too. And it's the basketball stadiums right there.

[Joey]

That's cool.

[Ray]

Yep. The conversation ends. Me. They tell us all, oh, there's gonna be these Blue Angels.

[Joey]

Whoa.

[Ray]

Those like, eight planes that fly over and shake the whole town. And so we go there, go, hey. The tallest place in Charleston is the Tap Room. Across. So we go across to this Tap Room place, it's hard to find it. Get all the way up to find out. The Tap Room closed. And now it's just a guy in, like, a little corner section serving, like, four drinks and, like, food that comes from, like, seven floors down at a hotel. And all the taps have been ripped off the wall, so there's, like, missing wallpaper and there's, like, marks on the walls. And to try and make it a bar, they pushed all the tables against the windows because they don't want people going on the patio. So all the tables, like, the chairs, you would open it up, and it would just be pushed up against the wall and all. But there was too much furniture for the space because of how they had had it set up. And they're in a renovation period.

[Joey]

Sounds like it's going well.

[Ray]

And so even the. The owner comes, okay, and he goes, how did you guys find us? I go, you're telling me, do this place sucks. He goes, that. That's crazy. What are you up here for? And I go, well, they said it's the best view. We're seeing the Blue Angels. Oh, that's awesome. Let me know if there's anything I can get you guys. This is great you found us, sir. It wasn't easy to find you. I mean, we took twists and turns through a hotel downstairs, and once I got up here and saw the kegs

[Joey]

ripped off the wall, I thought about leaving immediately.

[Ray]

Like, why is this place called Tap Room? There's no taps.

[Joey]

I'm gonna tap out. Someone tap out. I'm gone, man.

[Ray]

Well, the Blue Angels never flew across. Oh, we go back.

[Joey]

What in the world, right?

[Ray]

We go back to the Airbnb. They flew across. We went to bed. They woke us up from our naps, like, five times and shook the entire Airbnb. Oh, those are the Blue Angels we were trying to see on the tallest building. Now that we're in bed, that we're seeing them not at all, but shaking us.

[Joey]

So I'm gonna count that as another miss, man.

[Ray]

Yeah, it might have been an L on that as well.

[Joey]

Gosh.

[Ray]

But we had to meet our friend. We met up with our friend. We went to a place called on the Way for dinner.

[Joey]

Yeah. Who was your friend?

[Ray]

Katie. She's a connector.

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Ray]

So well connected. And on the way is from the show Southern Charm. One of the kids owns it.

[Joey]

Got it.

[Ray]

Missed him. I guess he was. He came Instagram baser saw it 30 minutes after we left. But after that, Bazer and her went to husk which we.

[Joey]

We have Huskies. Oh, my gosh. We've been to every Nashville establishment in Charleston.

[Ray]

I go back to the Airbn. I don't know the code. I've never been on the Airbnb app. It's like 16 digits and a pound sign. So what do I do? I just sleep on the couch out there on the patio. But I didn't want to interrupt Bazer. She comes back, she goes, you even talk to us on the phone, and you never once said you were locked out of the place. I go, it was beautiful weather. I was just chilling on this couch here on the patio. I was really in no hurry to get inside. I'm not, like, trying to watch a game or anything. And I'm pretty much good on alcohol. She comes, and I'm sleeping on the couch outside of a thousand dollar Airbnb.

[Joey]

That's terrible.

[Ray]

Good nap, though. Clutch.

[Joey]

I mean, that's like Greg. One time when we came back from 6, we were headed back from 6th street, and I don't know how he left early from 6th Street. Like, he bailed out.

[Ray]

Nobody's ever going to leave at the same time, right?

[Joey]

Never going to leave the same time. Greg's like, all right, I'm going back to Garrett's, man. I'll see you guys there. And Garrett's wife was in the house, so he could have just knocked and been let into the house. But he goes, I didn't want to wake her up. We found Greg asleep on the front porch. Always not even on. No, not a couch. Just on the straight concrete.

[Ray]

That's what I'm saying. When you see a locked door drunk, you're like, guess this is my spot.

[Joey]

This is my spot. He just laid down, dude. His credit card, his wallet, all splat. All over the front porch. He's just laying there, man. We're like, greg, Greg. Oh, oh, oh. Why didn't you go inside? I didn't want to wake anybody up, man. I'll just stay here.

[Ray]

Generous while drunk.

[Joey]

How about dumb when drunk?

[Ray]

We got to go to the next day.

[Joey]

Oh, we got to go to. What day is this?

[Ray]

Saturday, bro.

[Joey]

All right, we'll take a break, and we're heading into Saturday. Welcome back to Charleston. Or we'll head back to Charleston right after this.

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[Ray]

It's raining all day. Bazer wants to leave, but just because of the rain. It's not like anything was going wrong. But we already booked up things, so we go Tavern and table.

[Joey]

Oh, we don't have that here.

[Ray]

We're going Shem Creek, which is right there. There's like a canal. Dolphins are jumping.

[Joey]

Whoa.

[Ray]

Cranes. The ra.

[Joey]

Sounds like a good idea.

[Ray]

It's pretty awesome when the sun's shining. Rain, it was fine. Baser throws on a raincoat. We take a XL just to make sure we didn't float off the bridge or anything like that. Because it was a lot of rain. Yeah, I'm talking nonstop. Cats and dogs go there. And I got a Mac and cheese and pork.

[Joey]

Pork. Mac and cheese, yeah. Okay. Some pork in the Mac and cheese.

[Ray]

Really good. We got Bloody Mary's. We asked for them. Not spicy. They were on fire.

[Joey]

Oh.

[Ray]

Still drank them, though.

[Joey]

Good, good.

[Ray]

And then we. There's a place right next door called Reds, which is popular. People know about it. And it's. You're just right there on this canal. Dolphins jumping, watching games, throwing back beers. Got it ordered from a bartender inside. I said, can I get a seltzer? She comes back with a cup of soda water. I go, what is this? And she said, this is a seltzer. And I said, well, I'm sorry. Where I come from, claw me a claw, because that's a seltzer.

[Joey]

So when you say you're drinking beers, you meant claws.

[Ray]

Yeah. I was always drinking.

[Joey]

Well, you said we were over here at Reds drinking beers.

[Ray]

Oh, definitely not.

[Joey]

Thank you. Because beers and claws are two different animals.

[Ray]

And then we're. We're there. Our friend Katie meets up with us again.

[Joey]

Good. Katie. Is she in a good mood? She feeling good from last night?

[Ray]

Yeah, yeah. She said she lasted an hour after Bazer lasted two hours after me at Husk, and Katie lasted an hour after that.

[Joey]

Wow.

[Ray]

But still early. She said she was in bed by 10:30.

[Joey]

Then Katie is A connector.

[Ray]

And so then I'm talking to people. I meet this one girl, look like Billy's ex, talking to her, bought her a drink. Don't even know why.

[Joey]

Whoa. Because you felt like a connection for Billy?

[Ray]

Yeah. I can post the video. Then the Trey girls come over with 36 shots of a drone.

[Joey]

Whoa. And they wanted you to take all of them.

[Ray]

And the. I guess it was a promotional thing is what I'm saying.

[Joey]

Oh, yeah. So they're just handing them out. So this is the best say, guys,

[Ray]

I just ordered all these shots.

[Joey]

They didn't laugh. They did not laugh.

[Ray]

I told the people around us that I bought them. So they're all like, thank you so much. My bill at the end of the day was like 60 bucks. I definitely did not buy them. And those girls are mad at me because I'm taking credit for it.

[Joey]

Those patron girls did not smile. I got more. All these shots and she's going, okay, this guy.

[Ray]

She's probably wondering if she was going to give you one or not. I grabbed it. Not a big patron guy. It went down the hatch.

[Joey]

When it's free, it goes down the hatch, man.

[Ray]

The only reason for these stories is the girl at the bar. I had an interesting conversation with the

[Joey]

one that looks like Billy's ex. Yeah. Oh, okay.

[Ray]

And she said, oh, you're from Austin originally. And I said, yeah. And she goes, you know, though Austin's known for that one, like, swingers place, huh? And I go, excuse me. I sobered up real quick. I mean, patron bloody Mary seltzer water and seltzer cloth didn't matter. At that point. I was stone cold sober. Excuse me. She goes, yeah, there's this place called Cromwell or Clomwell or Colettes. Just write them all down. Truckers. When you got time in the parking lot, look them up. I haven't had time to yet. And she said, you go into it with a partner and, like, you just drink and hang out. You pay $150 and we just go in there. And then when you're ready to hook up, you go into these bedrooms that are see through, and people at the bar can see you hook up.

[Joey]

What?

[Ray]

That's what she told me. I'm like, excuse me, what did you. Spacer's over here petting a dog, and I'm talking about a swinger strip club in Austin for 150 bucks.

[Joey]

I thought you were gonna say baser was booking her flight. I say, when you found this information out, how come I didn't get a text? I was in Austin, and you didn't send me a text. And, hey, can you go check this out?

[Ray]

I hit up Billy. He's never heard of it.

[Joey]

I've never heard of it, man.

[Ray]

I don't know how they're legal, but I guess it's because you're willing. Then it's fine. But I said so just.

[Joey]

And since we don't Google on this show, I can't Google it right now.

[Ray]

Right.

[Joey]

So I'm not gonna Google it. But I'm very intrigued. I guarantee you, some of our truckers, if they've gone through Austin, they've stopped there.

[Ray]

And she said, there's only two of them in the world. The other one is in Denver. Wow. And I go, so why do the people. And she goes, they. They're into. They're into being watched. And she goes, Sometimes it gets creepy, though, with single dudes.

[Joey]

Yeah, I don't.

[Ray]

Arnold.

[Joey]

I'm not. I'm about to run this by hr. I don't know if this is okay.

[Ray]

Can I get a beer, a towel, and some lotion? I'm gonna go upstairs, hang out on the patio. I mean, can you imagine the creepers there?

[Joey]

Oh, dude. It would be like a gawk session and be like, hey, hey, man, let's go to this bar you've been here for. No, no. Either have I, man. Let's see what they're all about. Whoa. Dude, this is the greatest bar ever.

[Ray]

Hey, you guys go watch the game. I'm gonna go upstairs.

[Joey]

Is that the bass pounding and that music's live. I turn it down. Whoa.

[Ray]

Yeah. You guys stay down here and watch the game. I'm gonna go watch something else.

[Joey]

So has she been the.

[Ray]

Yeah, she goes, well, I mean, I didn't. Like, my wife was standing right next to me, so I'm not like, hey, so, like, what positions are you in? I wasn't, like, trying to act interest.

[Joey]

Not. Wait.

[Ray]

I was trying to act not interested, but also listen.

[Joey]

Yeah. Wow.

[Ray]

It was one of those Pacers petting a dog. And I'm learning about a see through swinger strip club.

[Joey]

You're. You're learning about people petting the kitty.

[Ray]

Mazer goes, hey, I met a dog. I go, what? We weren't talking about doggy.

[Joey]

What do you mean? Yeah, we weren't talking dog.

[Ray]

Whoa.

[Joey]

Oh, no, no, no, no. To her in my life.

[Ray]

No, there really was a dog at the bar at Bagos. That's how I knew it was time to go home, that you were drunk. You were petting the dog at the bar.

[Joey]

That is a sign. I mean, Ray is scared of dogs,

[Ray]

man, but I wrote it down. If we do get a dog, this is the one I'm gonna get. Dachshund. Super cute.

[Joey]

Small guy.

[Ray]

Very small. And it almost looks handicapped because it's, like, so fat, but its legs are so small.

[Joey]

Yeah, yeah. Can't run away very far. Catch it.

[Ray]

The lady would have never known that I hate dogs. I mean, she was probably thought I was the biggest dog lover, man.

[Joey]

So what time did you turn in on a Saturday night?

[Ray]

We had to go to bed. We?

[Joey]

I know you had a flight at 5am after that from Shem Creek.

[Ray]

Uber. Bazer saw a daiquiri bar that is owned by Leyva, and Leyva is on Southern hospitality. She owns the bars that all the kids work at on that show.

[Joey]

Okay.

[Ray]

And she's also sometimes on Southern Charm, but not really anymore. She's been phased out.

[Joey]

Okay. So did you go to labor?

[Ray]

We go to Lava's, which is a daiquiri bar. Look it up, Charleston. Super strict on dress code. We get espresso martinis. They're frozen.

[Joey]

Oh, and that was it.

[Ray]

We cashed out. We're back to the Airbnb, asleep at 3.

[Joey]

Not. Hey. And we already found out about the airport on the last pod on Monday. But you know what it reminded me of? I forgot to tell you. On my flight back, I had the window 19F. So whoever was in the middle in row 19E, she pounded, like, three beers.

[Ray]

Fine.

[Joey]

No, fine. But then she started burping beer. And so I had burp, beer smell wafting my direction.

[Ray]

Attractive.

[Joey]

Terrible.

[Ray]

No, her.

[Joey]

No, not attractive. And then she proceeds to pass out with her head against the seat in front of her, and she's burping still as she's sleeping, and then her head flops back against the chair. Then boom, it flops to the chair in front of her. Then we land, and we have to wait because there's a plane at our gate. This girl doesn't know we landed, head still against the seat in front of her.

[Ray]

You got to tell her.

[Joey]

We pull to the gate. She's still drunk, passed out with her head against the chair. It's at about row 12, and people are starting to jostle around, start move around, and I'm like, all right. And I. Hey, Poker. And I said, hey. Hey, ma', am, we landed. Time to get off. Ma', am, time to get off.

[Ray]

What are you, her husband?

[Joey]

Well, no, but I'm stuck at the window 19.

[Ray]

Fucking.

[Joey]

She was 19E. Finally I said, ma'. Am. And she goes, yeah. And I said, it's time to get off. She goes, I know. I'm like, no, you didn't. You had no idea. You were in a passed out state on the plane. Cool. So she gets off, and I don't see her again. And then I'm on the shuttle to the car. Guess who's on the shuttle to her car? 19e Beerwoffer. Beerwoffer. So we drop her off at the shuttle stop, and then I get off at the next shuttle stop, get in the vehicle, and I'm driving out. This lady has her bag spilled all over the ground because she can't find her keys.

[Ray]

I know where they are.

[Joey]

I'm like, ma', am, I know what I'm doing. Okay. All right. And I was like, let me get on the road before she does, because I don't think she should be driving.

[Ray]

Funny. You bring up the airport as the final part of the story. Because that's where my final part is.

[Joey]

Hit me with it.

[Ray]

Before we had left, Baser goes, hey, the Kentucky Derby's on Sunday. These apps are all banned and stuff. Let's just get on. I'm going to throw 50 bucks in the account. Why don't you pick a horse? And I'm like, that's so freaking stupid. Like, literally, gambling is the dumbest thing ever. I was like, whatever. We still got 30 minutes. We're sitting here drinking these espresso vodkas, and they're terrible. And I'm feeling it a little bit.

[Joey]

Yeah, you know what?

[Ray]

Let me get it. The app she has has, like, fastest horseshit. It has, like, finishing speed. It has, like, the odds. Doesn't really have the names, though. So I'm like, ah. The one that really could come up from behind was Golden Tempo. Like, really come up from behind. I was like, I love that. And the odds were like, 23 to 1. I was like, because I'm not gonna place this bet and win $40. Cool. Love $40. I want to win, like, hundreds. So I go, I'll do this bet so I can win $500. 20, $25 on 23 to 1 odds. So I was like, I'll just do Golden Tempo. It can really come from behind. That's what I like. At the Kentucky Derby. I didn't like that. It isn't used to long races. I didn't like that. I was like, just do Golden Tempo. I'm done. You want to pick another one? I was like, no, just do one. Check it. We'll Watch the race and do it well. We had fallen asleep, never watched the race. Woke up the next morning, and app doesn't work. Who did I pick? Hey, who won the race?

[Joey]

I don't know.

[Ray]

App won't even let me log in. All right, screw it. Get back on. Get on the airport land. She pulls up the app. She's like, oh, my Gosh, we have $500 in our account. I was like, the horse I picked drunk in the airport on vodka espressos, won the Kentucky Derby. Colton Tempo, the woman rider, horse and trainer. The woman wins it. I won on a 23 to 1 long shot. I'm back gambling, baby. We cash that sucker out, we ain't ever looking back.

[Joey]

Let me tell you, finally, you actually did something this weekend. You had miss after miss after miss, and I was just waiting for the. The sad ending of another miss. But you get home and you finally hit. You final hit.

[Ray]

Didn't even watch it. Even watch it.

[Joey]

I. I still didn't haven't seen it.

[Ray]

You know how crazy we would have been going. Didn't even watch it. But 1, $500, you would have been

[Joey]

watching with Joey Connor going crazy. Oh, except we didn't get to see Joey Connor.

[Ray]

Would have been at reds with the lady at the swinger See through strip club. Would have been at the Daiquiri bar with the espresso Frozens. Instead, we're passed out of the Airbnb and Golden Tempo crushes the Derby. Oh, yeah. And as we were trying to sleep that night, they did another Blue Bomber show and rattled the whole Airbnb from about four to six. Woke us up every 30 minutes.

[Joey]

Oh, man. Guys, that was. Hey, welcome home, man. Welcome home.

[Ray]

Why do we have $500 in our account?

[Joey]

What the.

[Ray]

Usually it's the other way.

[Joey]

Why, why. Why is there a debt collector saying I owe him $500?

[Ray]

What do you mean? There's a negative sign that says $700 from the hotel in Miami.

[Joey]

Oh, it'll come off. It'll come off. It'll fall off. It'll fall off.

[Ray]

It'll fall off.

[Joey]

Oh, man.

[Ray]

That's all I got.

[Joey]

Yeah, you guys have a great day. We're out of here.

[Ray]

See you guys. I'm petered out.

[Joey]

Oh, man. Dude, that was a great weekend, but your little stories reminded me of a few things. Dude, thanks. That was great. That was great. That might. That might be our best one this week.

[Ray]

All right, see you guys.

[Joey]

Bye.

[Ray]

Dude, truckers are already headed to that see through screen.

[Joey]

Oh, dude, they have already put in requests. Hey, you got any loads going to Austin? I'll take it. What? You said you don't like Dawson. Oh, yeah, man. I'm a change, man. I'm a change, man. I just want to see that city one more time. HR people are like, man, I'm uptight at work, but I'd really like to go down to Austin. What? And I know the tugboaters.

[Ray]

Hey, Austin in the Colorado River. We really need a tugboat delivery.

[Joey]

Dude, I just saw the Austin Fire Department. The applications went up by 75%. And the Farmers are looking at selling so they can get a penthouse downtown. And the lawyers, I mean, there's a lot of crime in Austin.

[Ray]

Somebody did away with that one.

[Joey]

Ah, dang it. I went one too many. That's all we have, right? Yeah. Yeah. All right, we gotta go. I'm going to Austin. Sorry, honey. I'm going back to Austin this weekend. Oh, yeah. I left my charger at the hotel. I just got to go back and get it. I just gotta go back and get it.

[Ray]

What's up, cousin?

[T-Mobile Advertiser]

I want a new phone. Have you seen any good deals?

[Joey]

Everyone has free phones.

[Announcer]

But when I switched to T Mobile, I got more value and so much more.

[T-Mobile Network Promoter]

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[Public Investing Advertiser]

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[Ray]

for for five years.

[Public Investing Advertiser]

Get more benefits and more value. AT T Mobile family save and get a 5 year price guarantee. Switch now@t mobile.com Qualifying plan requires price guarantee on DOC tax and theta exclusions

[Ray]

like taxes and fees apply.

[Toyota Advertiser]

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[Ray]

that happen along the way.

[Toyota Advertiser]

Because when people are the destination, your ride is important. Learn [e-mail] and find the vehicle that fits your people.

[Announcer]

At CVS. It matters that we're not just in your community, but that we're part of it. It matters that we're here for you when you need day or night. And we want everyone to feel welcomed and rewarded. It matters that CVS is here to fill your prescriptions. And here to fill your craving for a tasty and, yeah, healthy snack. At cvs, we're proud to serve your community because we believe where you get your medicine matters. So Visit [e-mail] or just come by our store. We can't wait to meet you. Store hours vary by location location

[Joey]

hey everyone, it's Cal Penn. I'm inviting you to join the best sounding book club you've ever heard with my podcast, Hearsay, The Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club. Every episode, I nerd out with amazing guests and dive into the best new

[Ray]

audiobooks available on Audible.

[Joey]

It's the book club for your ears. Listen to Earsay, the Audible and iHeart audiobook club on the iHeartradio app or

[Ray]

wherever you get your podcast. This

[Announcer]

this is an iHeart podcast. Guaranteed Human.