Loading summary
Lunchbox
You're listening to an iHeart podcast.
Baser
T Mobile's stats are as impressive as your favorite athlete's highlight reel because T Mobile helps keep you connected from the heart of Portland to right where you are on America's largest 5G network. Switch now keep your phone and T Mobile will pay it off at the $800 per line via prepaid card. Visit your local T Mobile location or learn more@t mobile.com keepandswitch up to 4 lines of your virtual prepaid card. Allow 15 days qualifying unlock device, credit service port in 90 plus days device and eligible carrier and timely redemption. Required card has no cash access and expires in six months.
Ray
Step into the world of power, loyalty and luck.
Lunchbox
I'm gonna make him an offer he.
Ray
Can'T refuse with family. Cannolis and spins mean everything. Now you want to get mixed up in the family business. Introducing the godfather@champacasino.com test your luck in the shadowy world of the Godfather slots. Someday I will call upon you to do a service for me. Play the Godfather now@Champacasino.com Welcome to the family. No purchase necessary.
Baser
VGW Group VO where prohibited by law 21 + terms and conditions apply.
MIDI Health
It's true that some things change as we get older. But if you're a woman over 40 and you're dealing with insomnia, brain fog, moodiness and weight gain, you don't have to accept it as just another part of aging. And with MITI health, you can get help and stop pushing through it alone. The experts at MITI understand that all these symptoms can be connected to the hormonal changes that happen around menopause. And MIDI can help you feel more like yourself again. Many healthcare providers aren't trained to treat or even recognize menopause symptoms. MIDI clinicians are menopause experts. They're dedicated to providing safe, effective, FDA approved solutions for dozens of hormonal symptoms, not just hot flashes. Most importantly, they're covered by insurance. 91% of midi patients get relief from symptoms within just two months. You deserve to feel great. Book your virtual visit today@joinmidi.com that's join M I D I.com.
Ray
Hello man, I'm gonna tell you what a perfect Sunday. An absolute perfect Sunday. It couldn't have been set up any better. Can you agree with me?
Lunchbox
I think you're trying to get me to buy into it being an awesome Sunday and then you saying how it wasn't.
Ray
No, no, no. It was a beautiful day. Was it a beautiful day here in.
Lunchbox
Town Yeah, I live in the country. I don't live in Nashville.
Ray
Sorry. Was it about 78 degrees when you walked outside? It felt amazing. The clouds were covering so it wasn't too hot. The sun was still out. But it wasn't just torching you. The wind was blowing. It felt amazing.
Lunchbox
Oh, yeah, yeah, it was about 78.
Ray
Yeah. Your boy gets up and gets the kids some breakfast, says, you know what, I'm going to go, see you later, honey, honey, I'm going to go for a run. And so I went for a run, feeling wonderful about myself. And I get back, haven't even had a glass of water yet and say.
Lunchbox
About a glass of wine. I was like, what?
Ray
And Baby Box 2 is like, hey, can we go for a bike ride? Okay, let's go for a bike ride.
Lunchbox
Doing an ironman.
Ray
So I chugged down some water and I'm like, I didn't know we were in a triathlon. Let's roll. And we go for a bike ride and we're riding around the neighborhood just having a good old time. And then we head back to the house after about a 20 minute bike ride. And there's my wife sitting on the porch talking to some woman. And the woman waves at me and I wave back and she's got two kids with her. And I'm like, I feel like a dick. I have no idea who this woman is. Like, I do not recognize her. I'm like, how is my wife? Like, who is this woman?
Lunchbox
I have not seen that shelf before.
Ray
Well, that also, but I was like, I don't. Like, I feel so bad, but I'm just acting like I know her because obviously she's sitting on my porch talking to my wife. Her two kids are going in and out of my house.
Lunchbox
Fake it till you make it.
Ray
And I'm like, hey, how's it going? Good to see you. And she's like, I'm just like, man, I really don't remember her. What is it? Amy?
Lunchbox
Morgan?
Ray
Abby? No. And then my wife's like, oh, I did it again. She was just walking by with her kids. So I just invited her on the porch.
Lunchbox
What kind of life do you guys live?
Ray
I said, oh. She goes, yeah, this is so and so. I think her name was Karen or something like that. And I was like, nice to meet you.
Lunchbox
You're going to have to change that name to Kiki.
Ray
Okay, it was Kiki. Hi, I'm Kiki. Nice to meet you. And I'm like, okay. That's why I didn't recognize you. I was like, I had no idea who you were. When you were waving, I was waving back like, I knew you. And my wife just has this habit where anybody walking by with kids, she just starts talking to them, invites them on the porch.
Lunchbox
Yeah, that makes more sense with the kids.
Ray
And so the kids get out of the stroller and they're going in and out of my house. My wife and this woman are sitting on the front porch talking, and I am like, okay, cool. And then another family walks by on their way back from church. And the lady, Kiki, knows that family. So they stop with their two kids.
Lunchbox
What is going on?
Ray
And so there are four brand new kids running around my yard and in my house.
Lunchbox
Hey, get out of the ferns.
Ray
And I am still dripping sweat from my run and from my bike ride with the kids.
Lunchbox
You look like a recovering alcoholic.
Ray
I absolutely do. It looks like I'm sweating out alcohol from a three day bender. And I'm like, hi guys. I. I mean, I'm smelling. I'm sure I stink. And they're just hanging. They're in their church clothes. The other lady had walked to somewhere. I don't even know where she had walked to. She was on a walk with her kids when my wife stopped her. And so they're all just hanging out. And they hung out for like an hour and a half at my house.
Lunchbox
At 8:30 in the morning.
Ray
This was by this time, it was about 9:45 is when this all started.
Lunchbox
Dude, life starts early for the parents.
Ray
Starts early. And so then they leave. And I'm like, oh, man, we better get the kids lunch. And they'll take a rest. And I will sit down at 1:40 when Scotty Scheffler is teeing off for the PGA Championship. And so we start getting ready, start doing that, get some lunch together. All right, here we go.
Lunchbox
Dad, where's Quail Hollow? It's in Charlotte, son.
Ray
And then I get a text from Garrett and apparently he's at Quail Hollow.
Lunchbox
Yeah, I had a buddy that went to Quail Hollow as well. Apparently it's quick Charlotte. Hour and a half flight.
Ray
Oh, yeah. He didn't tell me he was going. I just got a text and it had no words or anything. It was just a picture of Scotty Shuffler walking. And I'm like, oh, I didn't know you were going. And he never responded.
Lunchbox
And I think those golf events, if you're not drinking, it's probably pretty boring. The videos I saw from my buddy, you just can't talk. I mean, he would post a two minute clip. And you couldn't talk the entire time Scotty's about to swing.
Ray
And when you're there in person, it's about 8 minutes, 9 minutes, 10 minutes in, in between shots. So you're just chilling.
Lunchbox
And all the golfers are such tools. You can hear him in the background. Great shot, Scotty. Great shot. Oh, and it goes in the water. I'm like, you guys are idiots. None of you even knew where the ball was going in one of the clips. They all go, oh, my God. Oh, it was Phenow. Oh, great. Good shot, good shot. Oh. So it obviously rolled off somewhere, but all these experts thought it was a perfect shot.
Ray
They yell and they scream. And what's amazing to me is when I watch on tv, I don't know if there's like a camera there where these guys see the ball, but when they hit it 300 yards and they're like, you can't see 300 yards. So how do you know where it's landing?
Lunchbox
The people or the player?
Ray
The player.
Lunchbox
I bet the player has a pretty. I bet they can watch their balls land.
Ray
You think you can hit a ball 300 yards and see it?
Lunchbox
Yeah, dude. Some people have better vision than others. Justin. Heck no. The Dodds, Mr. Dodd. Eric Dodd. No, they're terrible at finding their balls. Who else? You. You're good.
Ray
You can come close, but I can't see 300.
Lunchbox
Not a chance.
Ray
No. No chance. No chance. Or hey. Or how far it went. He is. Oh, man. It's up by the green, man. Depth perception is something Pitts does not have.
Lunchbox
And some people when they're golf, they don't do the landmarks. Justin doesn't pick a tree and say, okay, my ball's about 10ft from that tree. Justin will get out there and. And have no clue his depth. He'll think that he's 300 yards, but he's actually 200 yards. I'm like, dude, you got to pick a fence post. You got a. A tree line, a shrub, a bush, a fern, a hedge, a trench, a creek, a river, and then see where your ball is from there. Every single time Justin gets completely lost. I'm like, you got to be looking in the horse pasture because that's where it went.
Ray
I mean, I brought my clothes with me today thinking I could sneak in some golf.
Lunchbox
Are you drunk?
Ray
It's raining, so.
Lunchbox
It's been raining since 7am I.
Ray
Great. So I'm not going to be playing golf today. So they're just going to sit there And I didn't get to speak the Cubs clubs last week. So I have not played golf in, like, two weeks, and it's really annoying. But anyway, back to the golf pod. So I'm like, yeah, I'm going to sit down and watch Scotty Scheffler. And next thing you know, I know it's about 2:15. I'm about to sit down, My wife's like, are you ready to go?
Lunchbox
What are we doing now?
Ray
I said, no, no, no. I'm gonna watch Scheffler for a little bit, and then I'm gonna turn on game seven of the Nuggets and Thunder at 2:30. And she said, oh, no, no, no, no. We have kindergarten meetup for Baby Box two at three.
Lunchbox
Oh, boy. Sunday, no less.
Ray
I said, what? She goes, yeah, it's popsicles in the park. They're doing a kindergarten meetup.
Lunchbox
Yeah, Pops is at home. Not.
Ray
I was like, oh, oh, I didn't realize. I thought we did that at the end of the summer. She said, oh, we. Last year they did it at the end of the summer two weekends in a row. But this year they decided to change it and do one of them at the beginning of the summer and one at the end. So maybe you can make some friends at the beginning of the summer and the kindergarten kids can get to know each other over the summer.
Lunchbox
Dude, this is advanced, man.
Ray
So I'm like, all right, cool. And then she was like. And, you know, since he's never done it and he's. It's going to be the first time at the elementary school for him. We. I thought you'd want to ride bikes with him so he can experience it like you do with Baby Box.
Lunchbox
You can't do another run and ride. You've been at it all day. You do one more, it's going to be Maui 70.2, half Ironman.
Ray
Yeah. So then Baby Box 2 is like, yeah. Dad, dad, can we ride bikes? Can we ride bikes to the school? I'm like, all right, man, get your helmet. I was just sitting down to watch. I mean, I guess I'll watch game seven when I get back. All right, that's fine. I mean, it'll be, what, second quarter by the time I get back? Middle, maybe halftime. So we put the helmets on and we strap them on. We. And my wife's like, oh, don't forget to bring your water bottles. All right, cool. Yeah, we go. We ride all the way to school. We get there, we're the second people there at the kindergarten meetup.
Lunchbox
And you've been sweating all day. What did you guys gas bill every month, like a dollar?
Ray
Yeah, about that. Yeah. We don't fill up the vehicle very often, dude. We don't use much gas. And so we get there, we're the second people there. And on the way there, baby box two is like, I'm like, are you excited? He goes, yeah, I'm excited a little bit. And I'm like, are you feeling anything else? Are you having any other emotions? He said, I'm a little nervous, too, dad. I'm like, oh, why are you nervous? He goes, meeting the new kids. Like, we're gonna all not know each other. I said, yeah, that's okay. But you can, like, play tag, you can play soccer, you can do whatever you want.
Lunchbox
Maybe some of them are a furry.
Ray
I said. And he goes, well, I probably have to introduce myself first because if I don't know their name, it'd be kind of weird to play tag if I don't know their name.
Lunchbox
Good point.
Ray
Genius. I says, very smart, dude. Very smart. So we get there and he's playing on the playground. I'm sitting there talking to some parent that I already know because they have a kindergartner this year, and then they have another one going to kindergarten next year just like us. So I talked to her, and I'm just standing there, and then other people start showing up. And then my wife shows up with the other two box boys and baby box two the whole time. Guess who he plays with?
Lunchbox
Himself, his brothers.
Ray
Doesn't meet a single new kid.
Lunchbox
Learn the other families.
Ray
Doesn't meet a single new new kid. And then I talked to a. A guy that I know because he's the coach with me of the San Diego Padres.
Lunchbox
What a small talk hellhole.
Ray
And so we're just chatting it up. And how's the weather?
Lunchbox
Good, Good. How's your sex life, Gary?
Ray
No, I just talked to him and I was like, man, you know what's funny about these things? We're going to come. We come to this thing and we're going to talk to the people we know. We're not going to meet anybody new. And he goes, exactly. You look for someone, you know, and you just get right there and you don't want to move.
Lunchbox
Speaking of that one of you throwing it back with the old lady last time.
Ray
And so we're just chatting it up, and then my wife comes over, she goes, all right, we better leave. And I'm like, what do you mean it's not over yet? She Goes, yeah, but we have the baseball team party from 4 to 6. I'm like, oh my gosh, you little.
Lunchbox
Did you know you were fully slotted all Sunday?
Ray
I said, I totally forgot we have baseball. Four to six.
Lunchbox
Gapped it.
Ray
She said, so do you want to put your bike in the car? And I said, no, we'll just leave my bike here and we'll just come back on the way home and I'll just jump on my bike and ride home.
Lunchbox
You need to find a YMCA and do a mile swim because you knocked out a half marathon, Ironman. So holy crap.
Ray
We jump in the car and we drive and we go to the team party and hang out and we're there for like two, two and a half hours. I have no idea what's going on with the golf. I have no idea what's going on with the basketball. And I'm just sitting there and I didn't see a single stroke.
Lunchbox
You got a cell phone?
Ray
I didn't. Well, I. Listen, dude, I'm trying to live, like, not on the cell phone. Trying to be in the moment and hang out with all the parents.
Lunchbox
You're off the grid. You're off the grid, aren't you?
Ray
And no, I'm not off the grid completely.
Lunchbox
I only eat greens.
Ray
And we're sitting there after a while and it's probably, I mean, maybe 6:00 clock at night.
Lunchbox
I went to bed at 5:30.
Ray
Yeah, what is happening? And I'm sitting there, I'm like, oh, by the way, who won the basketball game? And one of the dads next to me goes, ah. He goes, it wasn't the Nuggets, I'll tell you that. And I was like, thanks.
Lunchbox
Oh, I'll guess the other team.
Ray
So the some dad looked it up, he goes, whoa, Thunder won by 30.
Lunchbox
Wait, so none of these other idiots knew the score?
Ray
Dude, we were all at the team party, bro.
Lunchbox
There's apps. I got YouTube TV, I have Amazon Prime. I could pull up any baseball game, any golf match, any basketball game in less than two seconds, show you the score and put it back in my pocket rocket.
Ray
And then I was like, oh, well, who won the golf? And then the dad was like, oh, Shepler won. He won by like six strokes. I'm like, wow. All right, cool. Man, what a Sunday. I'm glad I got caught up on sports right now in the last 10 seconds. Cause I didn't see a bit of it.
Lunchbox
Ray, Are you guys gambling?
Ray
So that was it. That was the sports. I watched. I throw, I saw the kids throw some baseballs and tennis balls back and forth, play catch and run into the woods for a little bit going exploring, and Baby Box three came back bleeding with a cut on his arm and Baby Box 2 had a cut on his hand because he found some glass he was picking up. But that was it. That was the extent of my sports watching the perfect Sunday for a Game seven and a major championship turned into kindergarten meetup, a baseball team party, and random people in my yard and in my house. It was fantastic. But here's the thing. Looking back, the game was a blowout. I guess the PGA Championship wasn't close because he won by six. So I really missed nothing.
Lunchbox
Exactly. I thought that's what you were going to say 13 minutes ago.
Ray
No, I have. I Luckily my life did not take me from the excitement of the sporting world and I enjoyed my day doing other things. But the sports turned out to be big duds.
Lunchbox
Are we going to go into the games or is that all we're going to say about them and we got to rock and roll?
Ray
Yeah. I mean, after the break, we're going to go into them right after this.
Lunchbox
The break.
Baser
T Mobile stats are as impressive as your favorite athlete's highlight reel, because T Mobile helps keep you connected from the heart of Portland to right where you are on America's largest 5G network switch. Now keep your phone and T Mobile will pay it off up to $800 per line via prepaid card. Visit your local T Mobile location or learn more@t mobile.com KeepAndSwitch up to four lines via virtual prepaid card will last 15 days qualifying unlock device credit service report in 90 days device and eligible carrier and timely redemption Required card is no cash access and expires in six months.
MIDI Health
It's true that some things change as we get older, but if you're a woman over 40 and you're dealing with insomnia, brain fog, moodiness and weight gain, you don't have to accept it as just another part of aging. And with MITI Health, you can get help and stop pushing through it alone. The experts at MITI understand that all these symptoms can be connected to the hormonal changes that happen around menopause. And MITI can help you feel more like yourself again. Many healthcare providers aren't trained to treat or even recognize menopause symptoms. MIDI clinicians are menopause experts. They're dedicated to providing safe, effective, FDA approved solutions for dozens of hormonal symptoms, not just hot flashes. Most importantly, they're covered by insurance 91% of midi patients get relief from symptoms within just two months. You deserve to feel great. Book your virtual visit today@join midi.com that's join M I D I.com how to.
Lunchbox
Have fun anytime, anywhere.
MIDI Health
Step 1 go to chumbacasino.com chumbacasino.com got it. Step 2 collect your welcome bonus.
Ray
Come to papa.
Lunchbox
Welcome bonus.
MIDI Health
Step 3 Play hundreds of casino style games for free.
Lunchbox
That's a lot of games, all for free.
MIDI Health
Step 4 Unleash your excitement.
Dr. Maya Shankar
Chumba Casino has been delivering thrills for over a decade. So claim your free welcome bonus now and live the Chumba life. Visit no purchase necessary VGW group Void.
Lunchbox
Where prohibited by law 21/ terms and conditions apply I started it.
Ray
Please explain to me what was that? What was that in the bathroom? Like, what? How does that happen? Please explain to me.
Lunchbox
So it is honestly a great disservice. Somebody exploded.
Ray
I mean, guys, when I say Ray was at one urinal, this guy that was formerly on this podcast was at another urinal. And there's only two urinals. So then there's the first stall and the second stall. Mike D decides to go in the second stall. So I'm like, oh, I'm going to go in the first stall. And I walk in. Oh my God. Oh my God. I mean, it was an explosion that I have never seen in my life. Like nothing I'd ever seen like that. And here's the crazy part. Like after you have that explosion, you don't flush it. There was no toilet paper with it. So did they just explode and then run out of the building?
Lunchbox
They dropped a bomb. But it's one of those where. I don't want to get too gross with you guys, but it was one where it was, you know, it's shot. There was a lot of backfire.
Ray
Yes.
Lunchbox
So the backsplash, those are probably tougher to clean up.
Ray
No, no. But they didn't even flush.
Lunchbox
I gotta be real, dude. I was in Costa Rica for a whole summer drinking water and getting sick from the water, and I still never had a bomb like that. That was something to be impressed by. Holy crap. I mean, there's no way a woman could even do what we saw. That is like an NFL football player. That is like a guy that just had McDonald's for a month straight. Dude, that was a lot.
Ray
The funny part is, is I react that way and instantly the guy that used to be on this podcast goes, oh, I saw that. And we're like, wait, when did you See it? He said, I saw it this morning earlier. And I'm like, you didn't flush it? He goes, did you flush it? And I was like, no, I didn't get anywhere near it. And the fact that it still hadn't been flushed three hours later tells you that no one wanted to go near that well.
Lunchbox
And that's the not. The good thing is because then you leave it to the cleaning lady, why are we too good to not clean up our grenade? And then she has to go clean it up.
Ray
It wasn't my grenade.
Lunchbox
I'm speaking for the person.
Ray
Exactly. I am not going to go in there after someone else's grenade and take care of it. I wasn't going to flush it. There was no toilet paper, so there had to be. I was worried about explosion other places. And then Ray even goes and washes his hand. And we are continuing to talk about it. He goes, all right, fine, fine. I'm gonna go look at it. I'm gonna check it out. And Ray's reaction was disgusting.
Lunchbox
Because it makes you think the only thing holding it in there into that porcelain throne was the seat. And so then it leads you to wonder, was it on the walls? Was it on the stall? Was it on the floor?
Ray
Was it on the bottom of the seat? So, like, if you lifted that up to go pee, was it on the bottom of the seat? Do you get it on your hands? So I just left it. And I waited for a urinal to become open. I did. I did my urinal, and I left the bathroom. And someone is going to go in there, and someone is eventually going to flush it. I don't know if it's going to be the cleaning lady that likes to clean in the middle of the day. Now, this is one time it's valid that she should clean in the middle of the office, period.
Lunchbox
She's going to kill somebody.
Ray
She may quit her job, but over one bomb, Dude, I'm gonna tell you what. My sister used to work at the movie theater, right? South park, like 35 and Stasny, I think, is what it was. And she was the manager. Maybe this is when she worked at the Dollar theater over there at Wells branch. That may have been it.
Lunchbox
A lot of popcorn shards.
Ray
Yeah. And someone came and said, excuse me, there's a bathroom in the women's that's clogged.
Lunchbox
Women's.
Ray
In the women's. And so the manager tells my sister, hey, you know, you're the woman working. Can you go take care of that in the women's Bathroom. And my sister's like, okay. And my sister's really shy and quiet. So she goes in the women's bathroom, and she sees the damage, stays in there for about five minutes, and then comes out and goes, all right, it's all taken care of. She didn't touch it.
Lunchbox
That's what I was waiting for.
Ray
About 30 minutes later, someone came to the manager's like, hey, I just went in the women's restroom, and one of the toilets is.
Lunchbox
Dude, dug up butter popcorn, man. Twizzlers.
Ray
He looks at my sister and she goes, I thought you cleaned it. And my sister's like, I'm sorry. I just couldn't do it.
Lunchbox
Repeat offender. That happened one time. We were on a school field trip, fifth grade. Hate to go gross, but this is pretty funny. And it was 5, 6am is when they made us get up. It was in a snowy area, so we had to get all showered and cleaned up and then walked to the cottage area where we all learned and stuff about the mountains and about different animal tracks and all that kinds of crap. Grand Teton Scat. Yes. It was named after a woman's breasts. Grand Teton National Park. We were there for a whole week in school. It was phenomenal. Fascinating trip. Well, one morning, we only had one bathroom, and it was clogged. And the teachers wanted to handle it. They said, guys, we'll. We'll go. Address situation. They went in there, and the one teacher goes, I'm not even being a comedian here. What is in that toilet is the size of a human forearm? And he said, it looked like a bear snuck into our cabin and went the bathroom in one of the toilets. And so nobody would admit to it there. They may have even offered money. I know they offered. They go, just admit. We just want to know who did it. Admit it and we'll give you a free thing. Or you get a free front of the line to go to dinner or something. Nobody would admit to it. Nobody would admit to it. Days later, I have a twin brother, and bro comes forward and he says, dude, that was me. Drop the bear, dude. It was my own blood.
Ray
Oh, man, you should have recognized it, man.
Lunchbox
I don't know if I looked at it. I think the teachers all did they because they were grossed out about it. It was a major situation. You don't have a toilet in the Grand Tetons. You're gonna have to start going in the snow. And so it's probably more serious than a movie theater where somebody just has the butter charts. This one is It. Necessity.
Ray
Yeah, we were in Atlanta for my cousin Victor's wedding. This had to be 20 years ago. Had to be 20 years ago.
Lunchbox
Well, why don't you ask him, man?
Ray
I would like to, I've got a divorce.
Lunchbox
Since.
Ray
No, no, he's still married and his, his oldest son is like 21 now, so it was maybe over 21 years ago. And his daughter, his sec. His second child is graduating high school today.
Lunchbox
Oh my gosh, full circle. Why not tell this story?
Ray
Yeah, and so we were there for the wedding and so we're over at his apartment and we're doing some drinking. It's me, my brother, him and some of his buddies, my cousin, my cousin Kevin, who's his younger brother. And I was like, man, I gotta go. And so I go in the bathroom and I just. And I don't know how strong their, you know, systems are there in Atlanta, Georgia.
Lunchbox
I never do.
Ray
I was just doing a normal, you know, drop off and I go to flush it.
Lunchbox
It was an everyday delivery I didn't.
Ray
Understand and it wasn't like, it was like a three day, it was an overnight delivery, it was fine and I.
Lunchbox
It was next day Ray.
Ray
And it starts, water starts coming up and I'm like, oh, where's the plunger? Where's the plunger?
Lunchbox
Oh no.
Ray
And I stick my head out and say, hey Vic, Vic, where's your plunger?
Lunchbox
He's about to get married and he goes, plunger?
Ray
Why would I ever need a plunger? I don't own a plunger. I'm like, you're a 24 year old dude and you don't have a plunger.
Lunchbox
What about when you have the protein Schlitz?
Ray
He said, no, no plunger man. I said, oh, well, we got a problem then. And he's probably about 10 deep at this point. He's like, at his own wedding, this is before the day before or a couple of days before the wedding. And he's like, don't worry man, I'll get it. And he comes in with the shirt over his mouth and his nose. And what's he got in his hand? A knife, empty beer bottle. He thinks he's going to jab it down the drain.
Lunchbox
It's a thought. The rubber is typically what makes the plunger better than a beer bottle. So he's trying the ability to suction.
Ray
So he wasn't worried about suction, he was trying to jam, jam, jam it down the. That's what happens when you're 10 deep. I don't know, did it Work. It did not work. He had to knock on the neighbor's door and ask for a plunger.
Lunchbox
Hey, somebody didn't finish the end of their beer. It looks a little chunky. No, don't drink that.
Ray
Oh, my gosh. So, yeah, man, enough toilet stories. We should probably start the show. Probably start the show. Show.
Lunchbox
All right.
Ray
This is what people want to hear on a Monday, man.
Lunchbox
We are gonna do it live. We are the 1, 2, 3, soar.
Ray
Loser. I was really thrown off because the music wasn't there. What up, everybody? I am Lunchbox. I know the most about sports, so I'll give the sports facts, my sports opinions, because I'm pretty much a sports genius, y' all.
Lunchbox
It's Szit. I'm from the North. I'm an alpha male. I live on the north side of Nashua with Bazer, my wife. She's a country girl. We used to live downtown, west side, and we moved country, and it's great. 2.2 acres, 2.2 kids at Vanderbilt Clinic. Justin checks on him every single day. And I'll die of a heart attack when I'm 72 and a half. Over to you, man.
Ray
Oh, man. I don't know. I don't know if you want to talk about the games, you want to talk about anything, but I just want to say Callaway had the surgery on Friday. Doctor said that it went as good as it could go. And I guess Callaway's still in a lot of pain, but there was, like, 15 members of Sore Losers Nation that went into the ICU and were hanging out in his room. And if I know anything about the icu, my sister is a ICU nurse. You're only allowed to have, like, two visitors at a time, I believe, at least at most, her ICU. And they had about 12, 15 deep in there. And they all. I said, how did you guys get in? They said, I was just walked in. We didn't check in at a desk. We just walked.
Lunchbox
That's the Nation.
Ray
And they were in there for I don't know how long. And then the nurse came in, was like, what are you guys doing? And kick their ass out. Kicked him out.
Lunchbox
So we've been kicked out of bars and hospitals.
Ray
Yeah, we've been kicked out of icu. But Caraway Callaway, whatever his name is supposed to be doing well in pain. We got a long rehab ahead of us, but surgery went well. And dude is up, and he was talking espn, he was talking sports, but he has not given out any parlay. So we do not know if the surgery worked.
Lunchbox
So he's alive.
Ray
He's alive.
Lunchbox
Spoiler alert.
Ray
I got a question. Did Scotty Scheffler use a Callaway ball?
Lunchbox
Titleist. I looked it up online and it was all a bunch of crappers that use Callaways. No, not, not on Callaway. Our boy, Our boy is a good, solid gentleman. But it's the crappy golfers that have Callaway. The only chance we had, Phil Mickelson, and he was probably plus 20.
Ray
I don't even know if he was there for the weekend, man. He was already back in Dubai for the live tournament. He got, he was terrible.
Lunchbox
Yeah. See, I had a lot of thoughts on sports this weekend. A little bit romantically, kind of lost my love for sports. You start Friday night when you had Knicks and Celtics.
Ray
That was fun.
Lunchbox
It has been the biggest blowout this side of the Mississippi. The entire eastern seaboard has never seen a 70 point blowout on a Friday night primetime game. That would have never happened with Larry Bird and Magic Johnson and Michael Jordan. And that brings me to my point. These guys are shooting up the three pointers. There's no more team basketball. It's almost like a quit, a quit mentality. These guys get down 20, 30, they quit. I've never seen basketball games this lopsided.
Ray
It's very boring. And maybe when we're kids, they did happen and we just don't remember them. But I thought all those games in the Eastern Conference finals, the, you know, whatever, they would come down to the wire. Michael Jordan, John Starks, Isaiah Thomas, Michael Jordan. I mean, those came down to the wire. I felt like when I was a kid now.
Lunchbox
Schmitty undies.
Ray
Yeah. Oh, what's his name? Reggie Miller.
Lunchbox
Reggie Miller.
Ray
Rick Smith's all them. And now Charlie Ward. Now it's like one game's close and the rest of them are 15, 20 point blowouts. And it's like, this is exciting. See?
Lunchbox
And did it in my parlay. It did. It did. And we're fine with that. We move on. We, we had the Celts. Yeah. And so we've, we've moved past that. After two 12 packs of beer, we're finally over it. But the real thing is I, I couldn't even watch the game. I mean, it was a two or four point game. Porzingis drained a three, then Porzingis got a big blocker, rebound, one of the two. And then after that it was 10, 20. They're down 30. I didn't, I didn't watch any of the Second half, it was just over. I mean, just to not have that desire to even watch a sporting event. Sad. But it didn't end because guess what? There were more undesirable games to watch that the weekend was going to present us with. We then go on to Sunday, the Nuggets and okc. Another lopsided game from the third quarter on. That wasn't even close. It wasn't even close. And I hate Doris Burke and I hate Mike Breen. And I'm like, I'm done. I can't hear Mike Breen one more time. Say sgi. I had it at my house. Perfect. But it was like, SGI off the wall. Shut up, Breen. Give me some announcers. Doris Burke chiming in. I was done with it.
Ray
Bring back Jeff Van Gundy. Give me Mark Jackson.
Lunchbox
That game sucked. And then the pga. You said Scotty was a favorite on, like, Friday. He's ahead by so much. It is unwatchable. What has sports done to us? I lost my love for sports. I don't want to watch this crap. I'll watch a rerun of a girls TV show on Bravo.
Ray
That is just horrible.
Lunchbox
Where's the competition there? Back in the day? Hogan, Tiger Woods.
Ray
I remember when they squared off, dude, the Masters. Hogan and Woods. That Masters. That was incredible.
Lunchbox
Fred Funk, Fred Couples, BJ Singh. Dude, all those guys, they wouldn't get beat by five. You beat them by five, you're beating their family by five. The fact that Scheffler was ahead by seven, eight, 10 wins by five. Doesn't give a crap. Nobody even close to him. Sports was a blowout. Where's the competition? And I'll hang up and listen.
Ray
The Celtics got blowed out. The freaking Nuggets got blowed out.
Lunchbox
I mean, they had a guy that wasn't even playing with a left foot. They went and marched Gordon out there. They said, you're all we got, man. You at 20%. He started.
Ray
I didn't know that.
Lunchbox
The guy had half a hamstring and a quarter of an Achilles. And they said he's good to play. He's seen our bench not putting Russ Westbrook in for four quarters. That game was horrible. The Thunder up 54. They pulled the starters, started the fourth. What is this, guys? You can watch a better game at your local park. Go watch a couple Kids play 1v1. That's better than this crap that's been on TV.
Ray
You can come watch the Brooklyn Nets, dude. I mean, I talked to one of the dads this weekend. He's like you coaching against next season. We're ready to play again. That's the kind of competition you need. Those games are like four nothing for two. You don't need this 120 to 50.
Lunchbox
And I mean, I. I hate to really break down the game, but it really is the three point shot. How they don't box out. I'm telling you, they don't. There's so many times a guy will miss a three pointer, it'll come right back to him. And he's already. Hot dog. And he's got his hand out. You got the new thing where they just raised the hand in the air. That means, like, it was a good shot. Then there's this one. They do this little. This is the new thing. It's like. Yeah, it's like the west side thing, guys. You're not doing the hand gestures until it goes in the net. It's something to do with that. They're not playing the fundamentals of the game.
Ray
That's just. That's. That's heartbreaking to hear, man.
Lunchbox
But. But what happened with Boston? Did Boston say that we just. Poor Zingus. The ghost of poor Zingus that's now playing for the Boston Celtics. He's horrible. He. He made a miracle three. That's all he did, Pritchard. And it was just like they really were trying to do that what they did the game before when Boston won by 20. They're trying to do the exact same thing on Friday night. But guess what? The same shots that dropped on Wednesday don't drop on Friday. Josh Hart isn't going to make five threes. He probably didn't even score that game. And then your boy White and Pritchard, they try to launch these threes. Guys, that's the game. We need. Bounce passes. Give it to our boy Brown, backdoor cut, stuff like that. White thought he was going to be just as hot as he was the other game, and he was ice cold. He wasn't even close to the rim because you can't take the same shots. Why do you think we never do the same podcast? You got to EB Flow, dick and.
Ray
Dive, boom and zag, zing and zang.
Lunchbox
It was weird, man. I. I hate to fall out of love with something, but sports, man, it. It bit me pretty bad this weekend. It really wasn't even enjoyable. You're at the bar on a Saturday and sure, the golf was on, but nobody's watching it. Nobody gives a rip. It's not competitive.
Ray
That's unfortunate.
Lunchbox
It was actually Close on Saturday.
Ray
But I did watch a little bit on Saturday. I was sitting there watching it, and at one point, I did take a nap on the couch. I was sitting straight up, and I leaned my head back and fell asleep for about 20 minutes. And I did watch it with no sound on. I wanted a moment of silence because it'd been a long week with the kids as a single dad. And then it was just finally, I had silence. So I watched the golf in silence.
Lunchbox
Yeah, the Thunder game, I should have watched in silence. I couldn't stand one more SGA off the bike board. I'm trying to figure out how he did it. He was like, he would talk, so he would announce it. But then if the guy shot the ball as he was announcing, he would inflect his voice. And it was so annoying. I. Breen's probably a great guy. Cannot stand him. And Doris Burks. It was like, SGA down the line, off the ball. Oh, and there they go. Oh, shut the hell up. Just announce the game. It's too much of these dramatics. SGA above the wall. Stop. Dude, it was bad, man. It was bad.
Ray
I'm glad I didn't had to watch it, man.
Lunchbox
And you got Nance over there for the PGA Championship. Was it Nance?
Ray
Dude, I didn't. I don't know. I watched it on Silence on Saturday, and I saw zero strokes on Sunday. Literally zero strokes.
Lunchbox
You're not realizing it was tied at one point, but then just a blowout. Rom like quadruple bogeyed. Like what we do at the local muni at Country Hills. Rom was horrible.
Ray
They didn't water hit it out of bounds. What'd we do?
Lunchbox
He was hitting it watered. They go, well, he's going to be a little aggressive on this. It's right at the stick, and the ball cooks into the water, going like 20 miles an hour. Wasn't even close. We're like, okay, Rom. So you're going all or nothing on that one shot. Like, his plan was just holding one like Rom. That's what your plan was, really? It was all that. So it was over. Cause it was 10 and 7, and I had no money on it. Just watching it for the love of the game. And then it's like 10 and 6. 12 and 6 wasn't even watchable. I mean, I'm watching commercials on, so I didn't have to deal with Mike Breen, Doris Burks, or the pga.
Ray
Dude. What I saw is that some guy, Harris English, started the day in, like, 37th place, and he ended in second. How is that? Did he really supposedly?
Lunchbox
Cause yeah, I know it was Ron, but then he dropped and then I wanted him to be up there, but he was just missing those birdie putts. He did good. He made a couple in a row. Made it interesting. But then just.
Ray
You know who I need to check in with my boy at the local Muni. I'm going to go find him and see if he can tell me why DeChambeau lost.
Lunchbox
He'll break it down for you.
Ray
He'll break it down. You know what we're going to do? We're going to take a break. We'll be right back into this T.
Baser
Mobile stats are as impressive as your favorite athlete's highlight reel. Because T Mobile helps keep you connected from the heart of Portland to right where you are on America's largest 5G network switch now. Keep your phone and T Mobile will pay it off up to $800 per line via prepaid card. Visit your local T Mobile location or learn more@t mobile.com keepandswitch up to 4 lines via virtual prepaid card. Last 15 days qualifying unlock device credit service port in 90 days device and eligible carrier and timely redemption Required card is no cash access. It expires in six months.
MIDI Health
It's true that some things change as we get older. But if you're a woman over 40 and you're dealing with insomnia, brain fog, moodiness and weight gain, you don't have to accept it as just another part of aging. And with MITI Health, you can get help and stop pushing through it alone. The experts at MITI understand that all these symptoms can be connected to the hormonal changes that happen around menopause. And MITI can help you feel more like yourself again. Many healthcare providers aren't trained to treat or even recognize menopause symptoms. MIDI clinicians are menopause experts. They're dedicated to providing safe, effective, FDA approved solutions for dozens of hormonal symptoms, not just hot flashes. Most importantly, they're covered by insurance. 91% of midi patients get relief from symptoms within just two months. You deserve to feel great. Book your virtual visit today@joinmidi.com that's join.
Dr. Maya Shankar
M I D I.com hey, I'm Dr. Maya Shankar. I host a podcast called A Slight Change of Plans. I started this show because unexpected change comes for all of us and there's no set playbook for how to deal with it. I have all of this psychological baggage that I'm carrying with me and the last thing I want to do is to pass that on to my daughter. So I have to figure this out. This is this puzzle of my trauma. I have to figure it out, and I have to figure it out now. Join me this season when I talk to Amanda Knox about her choice to reconnect with the prosecutor who helped put her behind bars. This is not about him. This is about me and what I am capable of giving. And I know that I am capable of being kind to this man. And by God, I am going to do it. And no one can stop me. Listen to a slight change of plans on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Ray
Dude, I got a very excited text on Friday night.
Lunchbox
Was it a nude?
Ray
No, I was at the spring carnival. Kids school, you know, they celebrate spring, and they have jumpy houses and, like, food trucks and, you know, a bunch of games. The kids run around, they have fun, and they have just excitement everywhere.
Lunchbox
They have Glizzies. Pork missiles.
Ray
They did have pork missiles, dude. They had big pork missiles.
Lunchbox
A couple of those moms ordered them, too.
Ray
There was some moms chowing down on them, you know, because it's not the.
Lunchbox
Sexual thing about a girl eating a hot dog. If a woman in public can eat a hot dog, that's how confident she is.
Ray
Yeah. And that she's just a chill girl and she's down for a hot dog dinner.
Lunchbox
You know who loves a glizzy Angelina?
Ray
Ah, her and Justin still talking.
Lunchbox
We hung out all Saturday.
Ray
You didn't tell me that you buried the lead.
Lunchbox
There was no lead. We just bar hopped it. Nothing crazy. Ten bars. And I needed to make a correction. Guys, I told you about Mellow Mushroom on Broadway. Yeah, apparently you got to go to Broadway every two weeks because bars are closing left and right. That one's closed, it's boarded up, and it now is just a bunch of plywood. Oh, yeah. So anybody that was gonna go after my advice and go to Mellow Mushroom on Broadway, it's closed.
Ray
That's sad. It's unfortunate.
Lunchbox
You got to keep your head in your swivel down there because things are opening, closing. What happened to that bar? What's that name?
Ray
You walk in the front door, they kick you out the back because they're boarding it up, man.
Lunchbox
It was. It was different. It's good. We went to Odie's, too.
Ray
How was it?
Lunchbox
It's. It's tough going back into rebar, but I like what they've done.
Ray
Looks good.
Lunchbox
Yeah, I took a picture. I'll Post it with our podcast today. But they got a big back lawn, fake grass you can play, bags, easy access to a bar, and the TV is massive. We're talking 100 by 100 TV.
Ray
Oh, yeah.
Lunchbox
And we just sat down. We're watching golf. We were so comfy. We didn't even go bar hop. We. The girls, they're fine. They're content. We're content. We're betting if guys get on the fairway or not. Round of drinks.
Ray
That's fun.
Lunchbox
Justin was like, three rounded drinks down, and I was like, hey, man, I honestly. Is your car gonna keep swiping? And so. And so. But that bar was great. Um, I. It's almost like you can go. It's. There's so many different adventures. So you go into it like it was rebar. You can hang out out front, which is kind of like rebar. Or you can go into the indoor area, which is all walk through and there's music there. More of a chill vibe. Or you can go out on the back lawn, which probably in about a week is going to be 90 degrees. Be hotter than the surface of the sun.
Ray
Yeah.
Lunchbox
They said they're going to get some misters.
Ray
Nice. That'll really help us.
Lunchbox
We had the umbrella. It. It's. It's one of those choose your own adventure bars. It's not like you're gonna get the same thing every time. You could go to one part of it, think you're at a different bar, but you're at the same one.
Ray
But a lot of pictures of Odie up there.
Lunchbox
I don't even get the OD thing. I don't. There was no pictures of Old Dominion. I don't understand it. Some of their stuff was like, throwback. Like the area where the DJs playing was an old school boombox. So, like, it. Sometimes they're trying to go 90s.
Ray
I don't have a. Do you have a. They have a song about the 90s, maybe, or.
Lunchbox
I don't know, 90s Odie.
Ray
But.
Lunchbox
Awesome. I will be back.
Ray
Good. Good to hear. So I got that text on Friday. I'm. And I just see it, and it's from Batter's Box, and all it says is Purdy. And I'm like, what?
Lunchbox
Well, you had to know it was something to do with the 49ers.
Ray
No, I know. I said, did he get hurt or what?
Lunchbox
What do you mean? Caffrey McCaffrey.
Ray
He goes, Purdy signed. I said, oh. And he calls me immediately.
Lunchbox
What is he, like, stoked about it?
Ray
Yeah.
Lunchbox
You signed Mr. Irrelevant.
Ray
He's not Mr. Irrelevant.
Lunchbox
He was.
Ray
He was, but he's turned himself into very relevant. He's been to a Super Bowl. What's the last Titans quarterback to go to the Super Bowl?
Lunchbox
Steve McNair. Rest in peace.
Ray
I think it's Kerry Collins, but I don't know. Anyway, who was first? I don't know. Anyway, I get a text and he calls me and then he texts you. Can't answer. I was like, dude, spring carnival, what's up? And he goes, Brock Purdy tells me the details. And he goes, I love it. I'm so pumped. We got Purdy. He's our dude.
Lunchbox
He got our guy.
Ray
And after seeing the contract, it's beautiful. The 49ers. And Purdy did an amazing job because he didn't break the bank. He didn't try to reset the quarterback market. He didn't do what Dak Prescott did. He took less. He took a good solid amount that he doesn't have to work another day in his life. Like, he is set forever. His kids are set. They're set for life. He has so much money. But he let. He didn't strap the 49ers where they can't sign other players. Dak became the highest paid quarterback in the league. 55, $60 million. And now the Cowboys have blah.
Lunchbox
So what did Purdy get per year?
Ray
Like 35 million.
Lunchbox
A year?
Ray
Yeah. Or maybe 45, I don't know. But a year. Yeah.
Lunchbox
And Derek? Millions. Derek's making 12 million.
Ray
Who's Derek?
Lunchbox
Henry.
Ray
Henry. You're right. Yeah. He's making a good chunk of change too, which is crazy. But I love what Brock Purdy did. He did a great job. Here. Here's what batters box said. 5 years. 265. 5 million. So 45 million a year for 6 years. Not bad. It's really not bad when you compare it to other quarterbacks. Like, I mean, hell, Kirk Cousins is the backup and he's making that much money.
Lunchbox
Right. That was just a bad deal.
Ray
So I love what the 49ers did. Didn't overspin. Met right in the middle. Perfect. The salary caps going to keep going up the. So Brock Purdy is not going to be a huge dent in your salary cap. He's a solid, really good NFL quarterback that can win you a Super Bowl.
Lunchbox
Did batter's box think he was going to leave?
Ray
Well, he was worried that they weren't going to sign him or they were going to spend way too much money on him. Pay him 60 million a year, and they didn't do that. So he's really happy about the cap friendly that it is for the 49ers.
Lunchbox
Batter's box thought they're going to bring back Kaepernick. Like, who is going to be the quarterback?
Ray
Can I. Can we stop covering Kaepernick? I hate it when there's a quarterback that gets hurt. And at least one side always say, kaepernick says he's still interested in playing in the NFL. And I'm like, he has no damn interest in the NFL. He hadn't played in the NFL in a decade. Can we stop acting like he is an option to come back and play quarterback in the NFL? He is not. Yeah, he's not playing in the NFL.
Lunchbox
Well, let's be real. Sports right now is so boring. I think we're going to continue to do our research for fantasy football. We're going to be the team that researches for four months leading up to the season.
Ray
I love it. You and Justin are that dedicated.
Lunchbox
I mean, it's all we got because sports ain't doing it. He doesn't gamble anymore. Whoa.
Ray
What?
Lunchbox
Yeah, he gave it breaking news.
Ray
He breaking news.
Lunchbox
Whoa. Only have that sound effect in another studio.
Ray
Okay, never mind. I didn't.
Lunchbox
Yeah. So he sent me and Baser a text, okay. And it was a screenshot. And it says, you've been locked out of your account. You're not allowed to deposit. You're not allowed to withdraw for two months. And he said, you guys have motivated me. I hung up the betting slip today. So he is now locked out of his account.
Ray
Takes a brave man to do that. Man. Brave man.
Lunchbox
That's what I. I said. I said, as we go out to these bars on a Saturday, we will put our chastity belts on and we will not bet. We are putting our betting chastity belts on. All the other guys at a bar are going to be talking about gambling and this and that. What are we doing? We're going to wear our chastity belts because we are not giving into the sights today. But did we bet for some rounds of drinks, Friendly, fun? Yes, we did.
Ray
We'll take a break. We'll be right back.
Baser
T Mobile's stats are as impressive as your favorite athlete's highlight reel because T Mobile helps keep you connected from the heart of Portland to right where you are on America's largest 5G network switch. Now, keep your phone and T Mobile will pay it off up to 800 per line via prepaid card. Visit your local T Mobile location or learn more@t mobile.com keepandswitch. Up to four lines of a virtual prepaid card. Last 15 days qualifying unlock device, credit service port in 90 plus days device and eligible carrier and timely redemption required card is no cash access and expires in six months.
Dr. Maya Shankar
Hey, I'm Dr. Maya Shankar. I host a podcast called A Slight Change of Plans. I started this show because unexpected change comes for all of us and there's no set playbook for how to deal with it. I have all of this psychological baggage that I'm carrying with me and the last thing I want to do is to pass that on to my daughter. So I have to figure this out. This is this puzzle of my trauma. I have to figure it out and I have to figure it out now. Join me this season when I talk to Amanda Knox about her choice to reconnect with the prosecutor who helped put her behind bars. This is not about him. This is about me and what I am capable of giving. And I know that I am capable of being kind to this man. And by God, I am going to do it. And no one can stop me. Listen to a slight change of plans on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.
Lunchbox
Hi, I'm Radhi devlukia and I am the host of a really good cry podcast and I had the opportunity to talk to Davey Brown. Davey Brown is one of the most sought after wellness educators and through her signature blend of advanced meditation, breath work, metaphysical physiology, spiritual psychology and holistic training, trauma informed facilitation, Davey has touched the lives of countless students, including renowned artists, athletes and executives of global corporations.
Ray
But anything can be used as a.
Dr. Maya Shankar
Tool of avoidance with women, any kind.
Ray
Of thing where there might be this underlying edge of self sacrifice as martyrdom. If you're never filling, you're telling yourself a story and you're actually avoiding avoiding what you should be doing.
Dr. Maya Shankar
Your life at the end of it.
Ray
Is still going to be a sum of your experiences. And so you got to get in, you got to get your hands dirty.
Lunchbox
Listen to a really good cry on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Ray
Let's read an email. Here we go. Yo, gentlemen, I want to start this by saying a happy birthday to my big brother Gavin. He's turning 30. And secondly, I want to say let's go Knicks and Yankees. Mets play as well so f the Mets and Soto can kick rocks. Suck a fat one. I wanted to keep it pg Boys, I love the pod. Keep me going. Stay blessed. Marco from the Bronx. Hey, Marco, who's going to win, Knicks or Pacers?
Lunchbox
That's an interesting question. I've watched both of them. What I saw from the Pacers is a. Is a scorer. This. It reminds me of the Jimmy Butler type. Halliburton can score. I know that Turner gets lucky as crap with his threes. He's not very good. They got some other guy shorter. He reminds me of Derek White Pritchard, and he's gonna suck. So I. I would say Knicks. I'm going all in on. I would sit all in a gambling term. I. Knicks. Knicks win it. I don't know what the lines are. I don't know what the series price is, but Nick's. It'll be Nick's. Thunder. Thunder win it all.
Ray
Okay. Thunder going to win it all. I think the Thunder. I would love Anthony Edwards to beat the Thunder just because I like Anthony Edwards as a basketball player, as a father. Probably not the best guy to have you have children with. Doesn't seem to like to want to take care of them or do anything with them. He just wants to pay you money and get out.
Lunchbox
Pays women off.
Ray
Yeah, but the Thunder are really good. The Thunder are freaking good. I think they're winning the NBA title. Here we go. Dear coaches, the difference between a good and bad team at the high school level is the little things and stuff like guarding the inbounder. We always guard the inbounder. And we get three to four turnovers per game off of it. And. And that lead to usually 8 extra points per game. So I really don't know why the NBA guys don't do it. Maddox from Mississippi. Also, I dropped 20 in a summer league game yesterday. Put some respect on my name. Maddux.
Lunchbox
Wow.
Ray
Matt, dude. He's our high schooler that balls.
Lunchbox
Oh, okay.
Ray
He's a high school kid that emails in and he fills us in. Didn't know he was a basketball player.
Lunchbox
You got to come to the conventions. Otherwise we just view you as a ghost, man.
Ray
I don't think he's allowed. He's not 21, okay. He's still in high school. He's dropping 20 in a summer league game. And how is he doing? Summer league. And it's not summer yet.
Lunchbox
I'm sure summer baseball leagues have started. I didn't know about basketball.
Ray
Yeah, I don't know. Anything else you want to talk about, Ma' am. You said you had a golf story from last week.
Lunchbox
The golf story was that I Played nine. And I finished nine holes in an hour. It took me, Angelina, and Justin five hours to play 13 and Bazer. But, yeah, I played in nine. I played through like five different people. But what I realized is, is the shot still there? Yeah, it is. But what did I realize? Sometimes you can play too fast. Okay, I was playing a little too fast.
Ray
Okay.
Lunchbox
Okay. I'm gonna be real, guys. You can't play nine holes in an hour because I was not taking my time on these shots. And I learned it the hard way. A couple of those shots you wish you could have back, but, boy, was there a hybrid shot for 150 yards. That felt amazing.
Ray
Yeah.
Lunchbox
Was there another hybrid shot for 150 yards? It felt amazing. Yeah. Yeah, there was. But then did I rush too much on a par three, 150 shooting nine iron, probably stick down, stick up. And I caught it absolutely on the heel and ended up being 100 yards short because I was rushed. There were four army guys that let me play through. I have four of our nation's military standing around me as I'm taking this shot.
Ray
Did you tell them, thank you for your service shake, everyone? Of course I did.
Lunchbox
Of course I did.
Ray
Salute every one of them.
Lunchbox
Absolutely. I said, gentlemen, thank you for the troops, man. This is for the troops. And then I shot it about 100 yards too short, but you can go too fast. So golf, there's a happy medium. You don't go too slow. There's a just right amount. I didn't find it on that Friday, and I only played nine. And I learned if you're not feeling it that day, check out. I went and told the lady, I said, hey, can I get a rain check? Yeah. Here's $12 back.
Ray
That's legit. So it's sunshiny and you can still get a rain check. Yeah.
Lunchbox
And I want to go back and take a nap. I was. I was happy with where I was at, and the dudes in front of me were not letting me play through. And I. I'd already set the record playing through five people in nine holes.
Ray
That was pretty good. That's pretty good. You don't want to press your luck, dude.
Lunchbox
I was cooking. I mean, but let I tell you, you can go a little too far with the pedal on the metal when it comes to golf.
Ray
Yeah. And when, you know, when you're not really feeling it, you just check out. I mean, I wasn't really feeling it, dude. Thought we should go.
Lunchbox
Did you know you can do that?
Ray
I didn't know I told.
Lunchbox
She goes, what? What was the reason? I was, like, wasn't feeling it. She goes, here's $12 back legit.
Ray
What's wrong? Shot five over on the front. That's not up to my standards.
Lunchbox
There's no telling what I was at.
Ray
I just. I. I had a three putt, man. I'm just not. Not right in the head.
Lunchbox
Right?
Ray
Head space, man.
Lunchbox
I may have been at 78 through nine holes. Oh, but did I.
Ray
Wait, I thought the swing. It did not work. It's there.
Lunchbox
I just had rushed myself too much.
Ray
Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Lunchbox
You Feeling this Too is a horror anthology podcast. It brings different creators to tell ten vile.
Ray
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Lunchbox
Grotesque. Oh, my God. Horrific stories on what scares them the most.
Baser
Please don't let me.
Lunchbox
You feeling this, too? Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Dr. Maya Shankar
Hey, I'm Dr. Maya Shanker. I host a podcast called A Slight Change of Plans that combines behavioral science and storytelling to help us navigate the big changes in our lives.
MIDI Health
I get so choked up because I feel like your show and the conversations are what the world needs. Encouraging, empowering counter programming that acts like a lighthouse when the world feels dark.
Dr. Maya Shankar
Listen to A Slight Change of plans on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Ray
And it's gonna take us to heal us.
Lunchbox
It's Mental Health Awareness Month, and on a recent episode of just heal with Dr. J, the incomparable Taraji P. Henson.
Ray
Stop by to discuss how she's discovered.
Lunchbox
Peace on her journey.
Ray
I never let that little girl inside of me die. To hear this and more things on the journey of healing, you can listen.
Lunchbox
To just heal with Dr. J from the Black Effect Podcast Network on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you.
Ray
Get your podcasts at.
Dr. Maya Shankar
And T. Connecting changes everything.
Lunchbox
You're listening to an iHeart podcast.
Podcast Summary: The Bobby Bones Show – Episode "SORE LOSERS: The Perfect Sunday"
Release Date: May 24, 2025
Introduction
In the episode titled "SORE LOSERS: The Perfect Sunday," hosts Lunchbox and Ray delve into a series of engaging and humorous discussions centered around the concept of an ideal Sunday. The conversation weaves through personal anecdotes, observations on sports, and amusing mishaps, providing listeners with a relatable and entertaining narrative.
A Perfect Sunday Gone Awry
The episode kicks off with Ray recounting what he considers to be his "perfect Sunday." He describes waking up to a beautiful day with ideal weather—"about 78 degrees"—and an invigorating morning run. However, the tranquility is quickly disrupted when his wife spontaneously invites a neighbor, Kiki, and her children over for a bike ride. Ray humorously reflects on the unexpected influx of guests, saying, "I feel like a dick. I have no idea who this woman is" ([03:07]).
Notable Quote:
"It was a beautiful day. Was it about 78 degrees when you walked outside? It felt amazing." — Ray ([02:33])
Unplanned Family Time and Sports Disappointments
As the day progresses, Ray and Lunchbox find themselves juggling family obligations, including a kindergarten meetup and a baseball team party. Despite their initial plans to watch the PGA Championship, unforeseen events lead to missed opportunities to follow the sports events they were eager about. Ray laments missing the intense moments of the PGA, stating, "Looking back, the game was a blowout. I really missed nothing" ([15:47]).
Notable Quote:
"The perfect Sunday for a Game seven and a major championship turned into kindergarten meetup, a baseball team party, and random people in my yard and in my house." — Ray ([15:26])
Sports Blowouts and Loss of Enthusiasm
A significant portion of the conversation centers around the hosts' frustration with recent sports events, particularly blowout games in basketball and golf. Lunchbox and Ray express disappointment over the lack of competitiveness and excitement, citing examples like the lopsided scores in NBA games and the unwatchable dominance in the PGA Championship.
Lunchbox shares his disillusionment with modern sports, saying, "I lost my love for sports. I don't want to watch this crap" ([32:31]). Both hosts critique the shift towards excessive three-point shooting in basketball, which they feel diminishes the game's fundamentals and competitiveness.
Notable Quote:
"It's shooting up the three pointers. There's no more team basketball." — Lunchbox ([30:15])
Humorous Bathroom Mishaps
Injecting humor into the episode, Lunchbox and Ray share amusing and graphic stories about unexpected "explosions" in bathrooms. Lunchbox recounts an incident where a powerful explosion in a bathroom left a lasting impression, humorously speculating, "Somebody exploded" ([18:30]). Ray adds his own tale of a clogged bathroom at a cousin's wedding, where his brother attempted to fix the issue unsuccessfully, leading to a comedic predicament.
Notable Quote:
"It was an explosion that I have never seen in my life. Like nothing I'd ever seen like that." — Lunchbox ([18:33])
Personal Anecdotes and Reflections
Throughout the episode, both hosts share personal stories that highlight their roles as single parents and their interactions with their children. Ray discusses coordinating family activities and balancing personal interests with parental responsibilities. Lunchbox adds his own experiences with parenting and the challenges of managing multiple children’s social interactions.
Notable Quote:
"Baby Box 2 is like, 'Dad, can we ride bikes?' I'm like, 'Alright, man, get your helmet.'" — Ray ([10:25])
Gambling and Responsible Betting
The conversation also touches upon gambling habits, with Lunchbox humorously mentioning the implementation of "betting chastity belts" to resist the temptation of gambling while out with friends. This segment underscores the importance of responsible betting practices amidst social gatherings.
Notable Quote:
"We're going to wear our chastity belts because we are not giving into the sights today." — Lunchbox ([48:49])
Conclusion
"SORE LOSERS: The Perfect Sunday" offers a blend of humor, personal storytelling, and candid discussions on sports and family life. Through their relatable anecdotes and playful banter, Lunchbox and Ray provide listeners with an engaging look into the unexpected twists that can turn an ideal day into a memorable adventure. The episode underscores the unpredictability of life and the importance of finding joy and laughter amidst chaos.
Key Takeaways:
Final Notable Quote:
"Thankfully, my life did not take me from the excitement of the sporting world and I enjoyed my day doing other things." — Ray ([15:50])
Listeners who enjoy a mixture of humor, personal stories, and candid conversations about sports and family life will find "SORE LOSERS: The Perfect Sunday" both entertaining and relatable. The episode effectively captures the essence of navigating life's unpredictabilities with a lighthearted approach.