← The Bobby Bones Show
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- [00:00]
Commercial Announcer
This is an iHeart podcast. Guaranteed Human.
- [00:04]
Ben
This is Tab Ramos from Inside American Soccer and this summer topgolf is turning into the ultimate soccer destination. They've got a new soccer themed game you can play with your group, exclusive food and drink items. They've even installed full size soccer goals so you can try to hit golf balls right into the net and every match all summer long will be on throughout the venue. And if you want to keep the fun going all summer, you you can get the topgolf Summer Fun Pass which lets you play every single day and bring up to five guests every visit. Get yours now@TopGolf.com FunPass Amazon Health AI
- [00:40]
Coach
presents Painful Thoughts I I can't stop scratching my downtown. Mm yeah, but I'm not itching to go downtown and tell a receptionist I'm here to talk about my downtown. Some things you'd rather type than say out loud. There's no question too embarrassing for Amazon Health AI. Chat your symptoms and get virtual care 24. 7 Healthcare just got less painful do
- [01:09]
Ben
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- [01:25]
Coach
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- [01:28]
Ben
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- [01:39]
Coach
Want to drive CarMax? He's dribbling the ball with everything on the line. He's driving down the pitch. He's facing price hikes and cuts past him. Carrier contracts, tries to block him. Oh, he leaves him in the dust.
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Ben
He's at the edge of the box.
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Coach
He cuts past the nonstop group chat, trash talk.
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Ben
He clears on shoots
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Coach
unlimited data for 25amonth forever. Visit your local Boost Mobile store today to get unlimited data with a price that never changes. Boost mobile after 30gb, customers may experience lower speeds. Customers will pay 25amonth as long as they remain active on the Boost $25 unlimited plan.
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Ben
Coming at you live from Nashville, Tennessee, home of the Super bowl in 2030. But more importantly, the Soar losers coaches convention in 2027 presented by Freeland Chevrolet. We are one hundred and one Dalmatian days away from the convention. It is going to be a whopper. I've been telling all the boys at Freeland, Lewis Richard, still working on a discount for them, but let's get them in the door, man.
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Coach
I was on the highway yesterday and the truck in front of me, it had that little sticker on the right hand side, bottom right of the tailgate, said Freeland Chevrolet.
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Ben
And I'm glad we're talking about this. Do you have a moment?
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Coach
Yeah, I'll be here.
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Ben
When I asked you. Hey, where did you post the video of me in the truck? Because it would be a good thing to put on social for Freeland Chevrolet. Where did you put it?
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Coach
Instagram story.
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Ben
Oh, okay, Okay. I may put it back up there so it lives forever.
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Coach
Got it. My bad, bro.
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Ben
I thought I was going crazy. I go, okay, he can't get on X anymore, but I'll still check on X. Nope, not on X. Instagram. Not on Instagram. I didn't think of stories. And then I go, well, maybe Facebook. That's cool. He tagged him on Facebook. Wild. Go over to Facebook, search for 20 minutes, couldn't find it. And then I forgot to text you. But now, top of mind, I thought I have to ask you, what social media did you post it on? Because I can't find it. Tic Tac? LinkedIn. Ray, I put it on a LinkedIn. Real cool way to talk about stuff now.
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Coach
I mean, I thought, I don't know,
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Ben
are there any other social medias. Be real. Threads. Threads. There's no Snapchat.
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Coach
Like, hold on, bro.
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Ben
I thought for a second you put it on Snapchat.
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Coach
There's no way anybody that listens to this is on threads, right? No one's on Threads.
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Ben
Oh. According to Baszer, three years ago, when I was in the Dominican Republic on my vacation.
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Coach
Hurry up.
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Ben
Woke me up out of a sound nap and said, hey, LeBron James has been traded to the Lakers. But more importantly, you need to wake up because there's this new thing called threads. You have to get on it. And that thing, straight up, what did we say was the parabolic? What was the opposite of going good?
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Coach
Diabolic.
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Ben
Diabolic. It's probably still. We don't Google, but that's probably not even the opposite of parabolic.
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Coach
And nobody's even hit us up about parabolic or diabolical.
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Ben
And I got to be real about Facebook.
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Coach
Go ahead.
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Ben
There is some tab that I don't have that doesn't exist on my computer, so I can never see the newest post.
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Coach
Dude, oh, my God, you are speaking my language.
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Ben
I'm about to murder Mark Zuckerberg. What is happening? I searched the thing for 20 minutes and I still see new posts. I want to see new Posts.
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Coach
Dude, I am with you 100%. All of a sudden recently, you just go and it's like, that post is from three months ago. I don't want to see that post. I want to see the new post. Like when I don't know if people are posting anything because all I see is old posts. And I thought, okay, I am not technology efficient. I am not very smart when it comes to technology. I get that. So I was just like, it's just a me thing. And I never said anything to anybody. I just dealt with the inner frustration. I kept those feelings buried inside of me and I haven't let them out. And you say that and it is like, I have been seen. I feel heard. I am so glad I am not the only one.
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Ben
Mark Zuckerberg. How hard is it to leave that little three dot thing? I would click on and then it would say new posts and instead it takes me to whatever the algo thinks is the most important thing in my life. I'm sorry. I don't care that who the May brothers just banged a race car. I'm sorry. I want to see the newest post. I don't care that the Texas brothers are on there Talking about Texas 1 and track and field. I want to see the newest post. I don't care that all the sore lewers went and banged each other in Mexico and got married. I want to see the new post. Yeah, I don't care. Callaway talking about Mississippi State ice hockey. I want to see the newest post
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Coach
because the the one that's up there
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Ben
right now, July 10th and I'm liking people's photos with my cat's account that are from like weeks ago.
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Coach
Yeah. Why does it not have that? Oh my gosh, dude. Thank you. Thank you.
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Ben
I was seriously, I don't want to
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Coach
see Landon Locker post. He lost another case. He needs to come to the convention to drown his sorrows. I want to see the newest post.
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Ben
I was like, did he put when he said socials is like Robin Hood. Did he post it on that? Did he post it on Cameo? I don't know where he posted this. Got it. Stories. Instagram. We got to start the show.
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Coach
But before we do, I mean, we. I didn't know we were going to go there. I just want to say happy birthday to baby box. He turns 8 years old today. It's freaking crazy that he is 8
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Ben
and he go on a soapbox. I've got a present that you're going to open for him.
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Coach
Yeah, I will, I will. It just feels Crazy to me that. That he is eight years old. That eight years ago today, we were in the hospital and we were trying to delay pregnancy because he was six weeks early. And they were trying to, you know, maybe his lungs weren't going to be developed enough. And here he came out the birth canal at 5:59pm and they put him in that little incubator. Didn't even get to hold him. And they rushed him to the nicu, and he was. What was crazy is he was the biggest baby pretty much in the nicu, but you still felt it like, it was just like, man, this is crazy because we didn't get to leave the hospital with our baby. And I remember. I still feel guilty about this, is we were. I was scrubbing in one day to go into the nicu, and this family that I had seen there. How's it going? All the time. All the time we talk, talk, talk. They're scrubbing in at the same time, and they're like, can you hand me the soap? They said, oh, yeah, we're scrubbing in for the last time. We're taking our baby home today. And in my head, I thought, f you. Like, how terrible is it that I thought f you? Because they're getting to take their baby home? Because my kid was still in the nicu. But. But here we are. Smash cut. Feels like it was yesterday. And he's 8. He's freaking 8. He's a big freaking kid.
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Ben
Okay?
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Coach
Like, he is starting to look like a kid. He's starting to act, have his own ideas, and I mean, it's just crazy. Yeah.
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Ben
Thank you, coach. For that moment.
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Coach
It's like we were. We were at the lake, you know, we were on vacation, and I had a run in with him. He was. I. I asked him, did you brush your teeth?
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Ben
Why don't you brush him? I used to brush my hands waiting for you in the nicu.
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Coach
I said, have you brushed your teeth yet? And he said, yes. And I said, good. And he goes, no, I haven't. I said, okay, I need you to go brush your teeth. Have you brushed your teeth? He goes, yes, Dad, I already brushed my teeth. I said, all right, let me smell. He goes, no, I haven't. So that's twice. I said, okay, bud.
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Ben
Son, I'll be real.
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Coach
It smells like I really want to know if you've brushed your teeth yet. Yes, I have, dad. Okay, good. No, I really haven't. That's three times.
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Ben
All right, well, he's getting spanked at my house at this point, and I
- [10:25]
Coach
said, okay, now the game is over. I need to know the truth. I need to know, did you brush your teeth or not? And he goes, yes. I said, thank you. When I say the game is over. And he goes, no, I haven't. And I looked at his mom. I said, you better talk to him right now because I am about to rip into him. I don't want to yell. I need you to talk to him.
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Ben
I'm about to McGregor's ass. And I'm talking about McGregor from 10 years ago, not this new version.
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Coach
And she says. So she looks at him and says, hey, did you. And she goes, he goes, yes, I really did. I really did. I was just being funny. And that's when I looked at him and I said, hey, bud, when I tell you I'm done with the game, and then I ask you one more time, that's when I want you to be serious. And he goes, meep, meep,
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Ben
Roadrunner.
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Coach
And I said, timeout, let's go right now. And my mom was sitting there and, I mean, I thought she was going to die from laughter. She about fell out of her chair. She goes, meep. And so the rest of the trip, my mom would go, meep, meep. I mean, that is what an 8 year old does. And now I can tell everybody he's 8 years old because he was getting so mad at me.
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Ben
Almost killed him that day when we'd
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Coach
go places and they would say, how old are your kids? And I would tell him, 7, 6, and 4, dad, I'm almost 8 every time. Why don't you just tell him I'm 8 every time? And he said, dad, now that I'm 8 or I'm turning 8 tomorrow, do I come to the pod with you in the morning? I was like, no, you don't. No, you don't. But happy birthday, baby box. We usually start the show right away. We got on tangents. And I was going to do the Happy Birthday first, but it got overshadowed by. I don't. The Facebook algorithm.
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Ben
Well, are you going to sing? Because you did just about everything else.
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Coach
No, I'm not going to sing on here because he's never going to hear it.
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Ben
Cakes and candles, Bud. Let's start the show. Dearly beloved, we're going to do it live. We are the. 1, 2, 3, soar. Loser.
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Coach
What up, everybody? I am Lunchbox. I know the most about sports, so I'll give you the sports facts, my sports opinions, because I'm pretty much a sports genius, y'.
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Ben
All. It's sizzin from the north. Also from the west. Wyoming. We've been discussing it on the Bobby Bone show, the big show. I'm more there from the than from the north. I'm also from the north of Nashville in the country. The corn high. By the fourth of July, it's up. Yes, it is. And they're knocking down trees trying to make more farmland. It's beautiful. I absolutely love it. With Bazer, my wife. She works from home. Don't know what she does. I should probably ask her someday, but a lot of Excel spreadsheets. She redacts a ton of stuff. She does conference calls. She'll sit in on court hearings. And then those days, I can't even talk. I have a hearing today and she has to get sworn it. Yeah.
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Guest
Over.
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Coach
She's sworn in.
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Ben
Yeah.
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Coach
That's cool.
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Ben
It's wild. And the cat's right in the background. I'm like, so the cat came out, but I can't open the fridge.
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Guest
Got it.
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Ben
Anyways, we got 2.3 kids at Vanderbilt. Justin should check on him. He's at a dinghy right now in Gun Lake in Michigan. And will pro. I'll probably die of a heart attack when I'm 72 and a half. Hopefully have kids someday. Not today, not tomorrow, and probably not in a year or in five years, but someday. Coach, over to you. But as I say that. Back to you, back to you, and back to me. Here is the present for your kid. It's a surprise ball.
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Coach
Wow.
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Ben
And I can either. It can be a total surprise.
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Coach
Wow. It's a FIFA World cup one.
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Ben
It's. I'd say it's more. Okay. Scuba talked me in the airport. I told you guys this. I was 10 mimosas deep. And he's like, hey, man, content is king. It would be smart to buy this for lunchbox. And you guys can do it for content. So I can tell you what it could be. Unbox, collect and build your dream team with FIFA World Cup 2026 Ballers. Ballers Series 1. The officially licensed collectible from the FIFA World Cup. 33 football players. NFL.
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Coach
Messi.
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Ben
NFL.
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Coach
Guys, no, stop.
- [14:40]
Ben
Seven rare figures. Messi two super rares. Every capsule is packed with football fandom representing the best teams from around the globe. Brazil, Argentina, Germany, France, Spain, England, Uruguay, Mexico, Canada and the usa. Each player comes with a collector coin, a miniature football, and an additional epic surprise. Find rare moments like Messi and Mbappe frozen in their iconic World cup celebrations. Unlock accessories. Footballs.
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Guest
Wow.
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Coach
What a great idea.
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Commercial Announcer
Ball.
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Coach
But is this Worth more money if we don't open it.
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Ben
You gotta open it.
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Coach
Okay, I'll open it.
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Ben
Dude, but you're also gonna have to tear the butt out of it. I don't know how exactly you open it.
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Coach
Yeah, it's just like this.
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Ben
Here you go, kid. This is from Ray. It's four collectibles. One of them is a USA guy that's now worthless.
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Coach
Well, Messi is not going to win the championship either, so he's worthless too. Wow, it's a blue ball. Beautiful.
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Ben
Hey, when is that?
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Coach
Sunday.
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Ben
I wonder if my flight's early. I may. It's got to be afternoon, right?
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Coach
Yeah, like two o'.
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Commercial Announcer
Clock.
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Ben
Thank you. That is the only thing I like about FIFA. There's no late games after.
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Coach
They got to worry about the people around the world. They're more worried about the global audience because they're going to get so many people watching overseas. So they don't do it at seven o'.
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Ben
Clock.
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Coach
Oh, there's another wrapping. The blue papers wrapping too.
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Ben
Okay, so the outro was black. He ripped that off. Now he's going through the blue.
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Coach
Goodness.
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Ben
Well, if you get these for your kids, get ready to seat belt in for another five minutes.
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Coach
Yeah, it's not as easy as it looks.
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Ben
Oh, no. Now there's a white ball.
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Coach
Oh, Messi, is it? No, it's a black piece of paper. Oh, it's a piece of a soccer field.
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Ben
It's Legos. What a waste of money.
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Coach
Who did I get? What the heck does it say? Ballers.
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Ben
Their own brand.
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Coach
I don't know what the heck it Sundays. It's like three faces on there.
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Ben
What are you doing with your phone?
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Coach
I'm trying to. I'm taking a picture of it.
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Ben
And then you enlarge it on.
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Coach
That is. I'm like, oh, I got Harry Kane. And that's all it Sundays. But there's two other guys on there. I don't know who they are.
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Ben
Well, you're the football fan. That one guy.
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Coach
I mean, they look like English guys, but I don't know, they don't put their names. All right, cool. So I got Harry Kane.
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Ben
No Messi, that's going to be a loser on that one.
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Coach
Oh, if I'd have just opened this one. It has the figure and this is his coin. But why do they put two other English guys on there with not Harry Kane? So that's not a bad one. Harry Kane. But I only got one. This is the only piece of the field I have.
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Ben
So they probably do it. So you have to buy all of
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Coach
them to put the field together. And then you put all the players on the field.
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Ben
Dad, can you go to Vegas and get me another one of the ball?
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Coach
I got Harry Kane. He'll be playing in the third place match on Sunday also.
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Guest
That's it.
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Ben
That was in there.
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Coach
That's it, man. That's great.
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Ben
No, it's not.
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Coach
That's it.
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Ben
Oh my gosh. We got. Got.
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Coach
How much that cost?
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Ben
20. Whoa. Hey.
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Coach
I got a buddy that's in. He's from. He's part English. I will send him this Harry Kane as a souvenir since I have not texted him since the collapse of the British Empire the other day.
- [18:15]
Ben
That's also for your kid, though. That's his birthday present.
- [18:18]
Coach
Oh, yeah, yeah. I'll give that to him.
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Ben
Yeah. Thanks, man. But also, they got us. I don't. None of that seems rare.
- [18:24]
Coach
No, but it's pretty cool. Does it even. I don't even know if it looks like Harry Kane, but what a day, man. You want to take a break? Yeah. We'll come back. Hey, did you get kicked out of a restaurant, man?
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Ben
No, man.
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Coach
You didn't in Vegas.
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Ben
Oh, we did. Yeah.
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Coach
I'd like to hear about that right after this. Amazon Health AI presents Painful Thoughts I. I can't stop scratching my downtown.
- [18:51]
Commercial Announcer
Mm.
- [18:52]
Coach
Yeah, but I'm not itching to go downtown and tell a receptionist I'm here to talk about my downtown. Some things you'd rather type than say out loud. There's no question too embarrassing for Amazon Health AI. Chat your symptoms and get virtual care 24. 7 Healthcare just got less painful. Hey, it's Ryan Reynolds here for Mint Mobile Now. I was looking for fun ways to tell you that Mint's offer of unlimited Premium Wireless for $15 a month is back. So I thought it would be fun if we made $15 bills, but it turns out that's very illegal, so there goes my big idea for the commercial. Give it a try@mintmobile.com Switch upfront payment
- [19:35]
Commercial Announcer
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Guest
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- [22:16]
Coach
yeah, I was talking to Scuba and he mentioned something about being escorted out of a restaurant And I was like, how does Ray not talk about that?
- [22:23]
Ben
Because it's more bite than bull or whatever the saying goes.
- [22:27]
Coach
I've been. I mean, I didn't realize they would escort you out of anywhere in Vegas, Ray.
- [22:32]
Ben
It's more bite than chew.
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Coach
But I was there one time, and it was fantasy football trip, and we'd been drinking at the airport. Cousin Andrew flew. Flew from Lubbock to Austin to fly with us. And we were taking shots at the airport, and we were on the flight, and, I mean, we would just hold up our hands and the flight attendant would flip us mini bottles. Didn't even have to come give them to us. He would throw them. We were row four.
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Ben
That was before tsa.
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Coach
Before tsa, before all this. Like, well, no, it was pre. It was just like, they didn't care. It was like, whoa, have a good time. You're going to Vegas. And we had to stop in Phoenix and we. Oh, welcome to Vegas. Welcome to Vegas. And they're like, sir, we're in Phoenix. We knew, but they allowed us to get off the plane, which is weird. They let us get off in Phoenix and get back on. So we got off in Phoenix and got a shot. Jager bomb. Got back on the plane. Dude, we got there. I was so hammered.
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Ben
Hammered.
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Coach
I went to the club, and it was still daytime. Like, I literally had no idea what time of day it was. And we were at New York, New York, and they had a club. I was like, guys, let's go in. And I didn't realize they were just setting it up. They were just putting up the stanchions. And we walked in. I'm like, there is nobody at this club. Nobody. And we walk out on the patio, it was still daylight. I was like, oh, that's why they didn't charge us. That's why there's no one in here. So we left and I let's go get something to eat. And we took the escalators up.
- [24:16]
Ben
But, like, did you go to the hotel first? What made you. When you first. You land in?
- [24:21]
Coach
No, no, we were in New York. No, no, we were at New York, New York.
- [24:23]
Ben
Okay.
- [24:24]
Coach
We were staying at New York, New York.
- [24:25]
Ben
Got it.
- [24:26]
Coach
So we were gambling there and drinking, and I was like, man, oh, there's a club over there. Let's go to that club.
- [24:34]
Ben
Got it. It's usually not somebody's first thing when they get to Vegas.
- [24:38]
Coach
No, no, it wasn't first thing. It was a couple hours later. And I was like, oh, dude, let's.
- [24:42]
Ben
Hey, guys, let's go to a gay club.
- [24:43]
Coach
I was like, let's go find me an Asian.
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Ben
Woo. Love them.
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Coach
You know, like, let me find me an Asian chick. They're always at the club. And went in. The club was not even open, and it was still daylight. So we go to a restaurant upstairs because some lady handed out two for one drinks, like a coupon, like, walking around the casino. And I was there, and we were hammered. And they asked me to leave the restaurant. They said, hey, man, you are too messed up to be in our restaurant.
- [25:12]
Ben
What a classy establishment. It's got to take a lot in Vegas.
- [25:16]
Coach
And I literally was shocked because I didn't know you could get kicked out of places in Vegas for being too drunk. Had no idea. I mean, I understand a club, like, if you're passing out, but besides that, when do you get kicked out? It was just like a regular old restaurant. And they told me to go. But I remember cj. I ran into cj. He was on his bachelor party one time in Vegas when I happened to be there at the same time. And we went to the club at the Win, and he got so hammered. The bouncer did pick him up over the shoulder and take him through the kitchen and up the elevators also.
- [26:00]
Ben
Nice little exit route.
- [26:02]
Coach
Yeah. They didn't go through where everybody's coming in and up the stairs, straight through the kitchen. And we followed them and we went back to their hotel.
- [26:10]
Ben
You want to see the back of elevators and the part of the restaurants people don't see go with Cappy there. Every bar in Nashville has got a secret elevator. And you learn that when you get kicked out of places.
- [26:21]
Coach
Yes. You want to tell your story now?
- [26:23]
Ben
Yeah. And then we have to take a bathroom break. I've got the biggest eyelash in my eye right now.
- [26:28]
Coach
Oh, no. Yes.
- [26:28]
Ben
It happens all the time. I have crazy eyelashes. Coach. But me and Scuba book. He booked a 9:30 steakhouse.
- [26:36]
Commercial Announcer
Oh.
- [26:37]
Ben
And I couldn't get in my room. There was. He was like red elevators. I was gold elevators at the Luxor. Scuba handled everything. He had the phone numbers. He had the login. So he goes all the way to the red elevators. I go all the way to the gold elevators. What do you know? My key card doesn't work, so I'm stuck on the elevators. There was nice people that tried to help me, but their cards would only work to go to their floor. They couldn't go to my floor. So I thought maybe it was just an elevator issue. Yeah. So I couldn't even get to my Floor, much less my room. So I go back down to the lobby and try to put my say Scuba. Texts aren't working. So I just go, whatever. Go to the lobby. I tell the person, and he says, yeah, your name's not on the room.
- [27:20]
Coach
Oh, no.
- [27:20]
Ben
But in Scuba's app, it showed that my name was on the room. So what did I do? I just sat in the lobby for 30 minutes while he showered, got all ready. I was still exhausted, feet hurt, sweating. Scuba comes down. He's like, what?
- [27:32]
Coach
You're not ready?
- [27:33]
Ben
I go, dude, I couldn't get in my room. I've been waiting here the whole time. I couldn't text you. He goes, okay, let me go talk to him and get you a new card. So he gets me a new card, and we had maybe five minutes until the reservation. Oh, and I go, dude, I'm totally good without taking a shower. Just let me throw on a collared shirt. I was wearing absolute rags to the airport. And so he goes, yeah, you just put on a collared shirt. Put on a collared shirt, threw water on my hair, ran downstairs. Our reservation was at 9:30. It was 9:31. As we're walking there. Reservation was in the same place as Luxor. So steps away, and he gets a text, your reservation's been canceled. Sorry. And you're also not allowed to come to the restaurant we've closed. And we go there, and Scuba's like, hey, I got a text that said we can't even eat here anymore. And they go, yeah, you're one minute late. So we cancel the reservation. But we also can do is give you a 50 credit to any restaurant in this entire Luxor if you want to eat there. And Scuba's like, we wanted to eat here. And it. It literally, it's 9:31.
- [28:33]
Coach
Wow.
- [28:33]
Ben
And they go, yeah, we're all closed up for the night. Our. We're totally closed at 10. And sorry, the staff's already begun cleaning machines and stuff, so why even have a reservation available at 9:30?
- [28:47]
Coach
Wow.
- [28:47]
Ben
Obviously the staff just wanted to go home early, right?
- [28:50]
Coach
It was probably not very busy that night.
- [28:51]
Ben
Correct, Correct. And so then, yeah, we. We were at the entrance and Scoop was like, well, we can't just like, eat at the bar. And they're like, no, I'm sorry, you guys gotta leave one minute after a reservation.
- [29:02]
Coach
So you didn't get a steak.
- [29:04]
Ben
And I got collared shirt, hair's all messy. No, we found an Irish place where a Lady Plays Volume 100 and screams in your face while you're eating. It was real good. I couldn't even hear what Scuba was saying the entire time. Scuba was like, daryl Peterson. He's having a great game. You got to see this Wembiam dunk. Oh, really? Scuba, it's behind me. And so every time you say that, I have to turn all the way around and see it. I can't see that. I'm staring at this Irish lady saying, oh, what she singing? Wonder just screaming in my face. For the 45 minutes that I ate at this Irish place, I couldn't even hear the guy. He goes, hey, do you want to try a local beer? And so I thought their thing was Irish, that their everything's local or something. I'm like, no, no, dude. I'll just. I'm just gonna get some sweet tea. And then I could have swore. He goes, do you want local fries? And I was like, local fries? Like, what do you mean, local fries? And he goes, no, do you want fries? He goes, local fries? What are you a idiot? Just potatoes. What, do we grow potatoes in the desert?
- [30:10]
Coach
Hey, we grew him out back, man. Top of the Luxor.
- [30:12]
Ben
I was like, I thought you said local fries. Then we went back to bed, but one minute late. Don't do that at the Luxor, man. You'll get bounced out of that, dude.
- [30:22]
Coach
My favorite part is scuba loves a steak is what I'm finding out.
- [30:26]
Ben
He does.
- [30:27]
Coach
You guys went to a steakhouse in Chicago. Try to go a steakhouse in Vegas. Hilarious. So you settle for burger, fries, and a Irish lady.
- [30:36]
Ben
We had. The other option was wahl burgers.
- [30:39]
Coach
Yeah.
- [30:39]
Ben
And so we decided to get a little culture. Should not have done that. Because when we got in there, college age ish kids. And then it would get older in the back. And then the music started five minutes after we got in there, and the music did not stop.
- [30:53]
Coach
Was it a piano or was it someone walking around on a mic?
- [30:56]
Ben
Some idiot on a guitar, this lady on a mic. And she would hit the symbol with her hand, and she was screaming non stop for 45 minutes. Any loud song you can think of, she was yelling it just blaring it in my face. I just got off of a red eye. I'm not showered, I'm unkempt, I'm not drinking. I got Scuba telling me about Darren Peterson, who I know about. I'm aware about Darren Peterson. Scuba get a dude. She introduces her guitar player like it's like Stevie Ray Vaughan. Like, the guy's playing at a dive bar in Vegas at an Irish bar. Like, he can't be that talented. Just stop, stop. Everything was loud. And then the back section where it was the older unk people. Yeah. Hammered. All of them hammered. Dancing to each other.
- [31:57]
Coach
We.
- [31:58]
Ben
So we went. We went to the wrong restaurant and we went to the wrong section. We should have sat in the beginning section because at least it was college age. People. You had rockets everywhere. People. You go back section. Those are the die hard Vegas people who want to be screamed in their face like they're. They like music that bad. They want. The lady was screaming in this guy's face like two feet away from him and he was loving it. Unbuttoning his shirt, dancing like that. She's screaming in his face like he's a nasty, nasty dude.
- [32:31]
Coach
How'd she look?
- [32:33]
Ben
She looked road hard and hung up wet, but she was showing midriff.
- [32:41]
Coach
Really.
- [32:45]
Ben
What a place.
- [32:46]
Coach
Oh my gosh. Vegas, man. You're headed back today. I can't wait. We'll take a break and you're gonna. Here's what's funny. We're not going to have any Vegas stories or next week because you're going literally by yourself.
- [32:56]
Ben
Yeah.
- [32:57]
Coach
And I know what you're going to do. You're going to sit in your room all day until the competition and that is it.
- [33:03]
Ben
There won't be any stories. There won't be any. I'll tell you that right now. I'm. What can you do solo? Bazer's like, take at least a dollar to throw on a craps game. I'm like, okay, but other than that, what is there to do in Vegas by yourself?
- [33:19]
Coach
You got to go up to the pool and check it out.
- [33:21]
Ben
I will. I brought the sandals.
- [33:23]
Coach
Okay, you have to. What else do you have to do?
- [33:27]
Ben
I mean, there's no sports on and I don't sports bet. I the British Open, but I don't sports bet. I'm not just going to watch the British Open at the pool. Hey, man, can you throw on the Open?
- [33:39]
Coach
You're not going to ask him to throw it on. It'll be on.
- [33:41]
Ben
Okay. There's that many TVs.
- [33:43]
Coach
Yes.
- [33:43]
Ben
Yeah.
- [33:44]
Coach
And it's over the pool. And you're going to be the only one that's up at 8 o' clock in the morning.
- [33:47]
Ben
Hey, Rory, in a hundred years you won't be allowed around. Do you care about your legacy? Well, you're right. I'll be eight feet under. I'll be dead. So, I mean, if I'm dead, why would I care what people think when I'm dead. Yeah, I mean, you are right. In a hundred years I will be dead.
- [34:01]
Coach
I mean, you're gonna go up to the sports book at 8am by the pool. You're gonna be the only one there.
- [34:07]
Ben
That's actually my style.
- [34:08]
Coach
That's what I'm saying. So you'll be able to get a seat. You can just watch a little bit of the British Open and just think about how amazing that place is.
- [34:14]
Ben
Maybe there'll be one story. All right, Pacer hit me though. On the way out she goes. What are you packing your swim trunks for? You are going Mandalay Bay, aren't you?
- [34:27]
Coach
We'll take a break. We'll be right back. Amazon Health AI presents Painful Thoughts I I can't stop scratching my downtown. Mm, yeah, but I'm not itching to go downtown and tell a receptionist I'm here to talk about my downtown. Some things you'd rather type than say out loud. There's no question too embarrassing For Amazon Health AI chat your symptoms and get virtual care 24. 7 Healthcare just got less painful.
- [34:59]
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- [36:30]
Guest
to ask this, but hey, did you download the trail map?
- [36:33]
Coach
Yeah, no, I don't need to.
- [36:35]
Guest
I don't understand.
- [36:35]
Ben
You're trusting your signal out here.
- [36:37]
Coach
Well, I'm trusting T Mobile.
- [36:38]
Commercial Announcer
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- [36:41]
Coach
nowhere, well, we've got T Satellite for backup.
- [36:44]
Ben
Whoa.
- [36:44]
Guest
I don't trust my carrier that much.
- [36:46]
Coach
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- [37:10]
Ben
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- [37:13]
Coach
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- [37:14]
Ben
and 35 connection charge per line credits and imbalance too.
- [37:17]
Coach
If you pay off earlier, cancel contact US Finance Agreement example 299.99 Moto Edge 5G required T Satellite available with compatible device in most outdoor areas in the US where you can see the sky
- [37:25]
Ben
Included with experience beyond $10 a month
- [37:27]
Coach
auto renews monthly cancel anytime@t mobile.com bite
- [37:30]
Guest
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- [38:31]
Coach
Hey, did you need to stop it so you can get your eyelash.
- [38:33]
Ben
No, now it's moved. It shifted, but we're good.
- [38:36]
Coach
Dude, let me tell you my, you know, baby box. Playing summer baseball. I play it. Made All Stars. First practice, you know, go to first practice. And I'm like, all right, this is gonna be great. And he gets out there and I'm sitting in the bleachers and there's these two little girls running around in front of the bleach, just, you know, being little kids, whatever.
- [38:54]
Ben
And I'm just gonna assume any story you tell is just always littered with kids.
- [39:00]
Coach
Yeah, this one is.
- [39:01]
Ben
I'm never around kids. It sounds like everything you do, you've got five kids running between around you.
- [39:07]
Coach
Yeah.
- [39:08]
Ben
Okay.
- [39:09]
Coach
All right. So these two little girls are there, and I'm sitting in the bleachers and kind of watching practice. And it's about 15 minutes into practice in this absolute smoke show shows up.
- [39:22]
Ben
Dad.
- [39:24]
Coach
No, mama. And she's in this, like, short dress, high heels, cut right around the mountains.
- [39:36]
Ben
She's trying to get her kid playing time.
- [39:38]
Coach
Oh, my gosh. Well, he's starting and I mean, she's come. You got to walk through grass and dirt to get to the bleachers. And she's walking in this little dress. It's white and has flowers on it. And she's tan and she's tall.
- [39:56]
Ben
Was it baser?
- [39:57]
Coach
And I'm. I said tall.
- [40:00]
Ben
She's tall for a girl.
- [40:01]
Coach
Oh, she's taller than me.
- [40:04]
Ben
No, I. I digress.
- [40:06]
Coach
Anyway, anyway. And I'm like, dang. Don't look, don't look.
- [40:11]
Ben
Was your wife there?
- [40:12]
Coach
No.
- [40:13]
Ben
Good gosh, coach.
- [40:14]
Coach
But this, I'm telling you, this lady was hot. Hot.
- [40:18]
Ben
She wanted to make a scene as well.
- [40:20]
Coach
She wanted to make a scene. And she sits down, she says hi to another mom, and she's like, ah, I got off work late. I had to go home and change. I'm like, wait a minute, hold on. So you left work and that's what you changed into? I thought she came straight from work because she was running late, but no, she was. Went home, changed into this dress. So she's really, really trying to send a message.
- [40:49]
Ben
What do you wear to work? Mini skirt and 9 inch, right? Good God, we've got one of those.
- [40:56]
Coach
Or maybe she wears something that she's fully covered up and she's like, I gotta let loose at night. And the place to do it as All Stars for 8 year olds at the little league field.
- [41:07]
Ben
So there's all Stars on the Field and off the field and off the field. Dude, apparently I'm wearing too much clothing.
- [41:13]
Coach
How are you?
- [41:14]
Ben
I'm lunchbox.
- [41:15]
Coach
Probably the number one draft pick was sitting in the stands.
- [41:19]
Ben
Well, the coaches aren't focused anymore.
- [41:21]
Coach
Oh, no, they're not.
- [41:22]
Ben
And hopefully little Johnny knows where second bases. They're like coaches, because coach is trying to hit a home run.
- [41:34]
Coach
So she's sitting there and she's talking to the little girls or whatever. And then here comes one of the dads that was on the field, and he sits down on the other side of the little girls. So it's the. The woman in this dress looking amazing. I'm talking, like, Daisy Fuentes kind of tan and just. Whoo. And then two little girls and him.
- [41:54]
Ben
She looks like one of those weather reporters that they show in Mexico on Instagram that they're known for wearing tight clothes.
- [42:02]
Coach
100. They're 100.
- [42:04]
Ben
Their. Their cast is based around their clothing.
- [42:08]
Coach
Ding, ding, ding. Couldn't have said it better myself.
- [42:11]
Ben
Which Ray, I wish they'd bring that over to America.
- [42:14]
Coach
So I look, and the dad is talking to the two girls, and she's talking to the two girls, but they're not talking to each other.
- [42:21]
Guest
Mm.
- [42:22]
Coach
And I'm like, huh, that's weird. He's like. She's like, so, how was camp today? And the daughter responds. And then she says, oh, well, tell your dad this. So the daughter tells the dad that.
- [42:39]
Ben
I'm like, huh, welcome to 2026.
- [42:43]
Coach
I'm like, okay, all right. You know, I'm just sitting there watching practice, and that dude sits there for, like, 10 minutes, and then he goes, all right, you guys stay with your mom. I'm going to go back out there and help out with the team. And the minute he hits the dugout, she turns to me, oh, no. I mean, I ain't never talked to this woman. And she goes, well, that was awkward. I said, oh, I didn't think it was awkward. She goes, no, I've been trying to divorce him for a year and a half, and he will not divorce me. I said, really? Yeah. I've had those papers drawn up, and he refuses to sign them. So he's just holding me hostage.
- [43:34]
Ben
I like. I like hostage movies.
- [43:36]
Coach
And I'm like, I can see why he didn't want to divorce you. I mean, I'm looking at you, but tell me more. And she's like, yeah. I mean, all he has to do is sign it, and we'd be divorced. It's been a year and a half. We have our separate places. But he refuses. And I even have a restraining order against him.
- [43:55]
Ben
Peanuts.
- [43:56]
Coach
I'm like, popcorn, Popcorn. Hot dog.
- [44:01]
Ben
Hot dog.
- [44:01]
Coach
Cold beer. Cold beer. Can I get two of those, please?
- [44:05]
Ben
Please tell me you told her about the convention. And I said, that's where she'll find true love.
- [44:10]
Coach
I said, really? She goes, yeah, yeah. And he just. He just failed a sobriety test.
- [44:20]
Ben
This gets better. Oh, they have kids.
- [44:22]
Guest
But still.
- [44:23]
Coach
She goes, so he's not allowed to be with the kids by himself. And he's only allowed to be around me if I say it because of the restraining order.
- [44:36]
Ben
Who's the husband? Justin Timberlake.
- [44:39]
Coach
He looks like. What is that guy? What is his name? He's a comedian. His wife died. She wrote a book.
- [44:49]
Ben
Ray Romano. No, you're fine, coach. Anyway, our listeners actually would prefer you describe the woman more instead of.
- [44:56]
Coach
Yes. Instead of the man. And he is. I mean, he's short, so she's way taller than him.
- [45:01]
Ben
So he looks like me, kind of. Okay, that's.
- [45:03]
Coach
Older you. Older you.
- [45:05]
Ben
Okay.
- [45:05]
Coach
And I was just like, oh. She goes, yeah. So I don't know why when he came and sat here, I mean, it was just. That's so awkward, wasn't it? And I was like, yeah. She goes, I just. I mean, I just wish he'd sign the papers.
- [45:19]
Ben
Sometimes you need a shoulder to lean on.
- [45:21]
Coach
He goes. She goes, so we don't really communicate, and it's just a bad situation all
- [45:27]
Ben
around the poor daughters, but.
- [45:31]
Coach
And I'm like, oh, which one's your son out there? She goes, oh, he's over there at second base.
- [45:35]
Ben
I'm like, all right, he's tan, just like you.
- [45:39]
Coach
She goes, yeah, so it's just very weird in these situations. She goes, I don't even know why he came over and sat down. Maybe just to make it awkward. I'm like, well, maybe because you showed up in this dress where you were showing him the cleavage, like, hey, this is what you're missing out on. I don't know. Maybe because those are his daughters and he just wanted to say hi to them. I have no idea why he came and sat here, but the fact that I have known you for, let me see, three seconds. You didn't even say hi, I'm so. And so. You just turned around and said, that was awkward.
- [46:11]
Ben
Two words, Play date.
- [46:14]
Coach
Oh, for sure. Got to get the kids together.
- [46:16]
Ben
Listen, your kids can't just be hanging out with the same sex. They need to learn how females are that one. That sounds like not another a Better option for a play date.
- [46:26]
Coach
Dude, it was. I mean, so what it tells me is that she's crazy, right? I mean, obviously.
- [46:35]
Ben
Mm.
- [46:36]
Coach
And he's crazy, but filthy rich.
- [46:39]
Ben
If they both have their own houses.
- [46:40]
Coach
Correct. I think they have money.
- [46:43]
Ben
Geez. What side of the moat?
- [46:44]
Coach
But my question is, why won't he divorce her? Or is that just made up and she has a restraining order? And then she tells me he failed a sobriety test where he's not supposed to be drinking.
- [46:57]
Ben
It's just something he can hold over. I'm not divorcing you. I mean, what's the point of it?
- [47:01]
Coach
I got a question.
- [47:02]
Ben
He doesn't want the discovery to happen. I'm looking to the finances.
- [47:05]
Coach
You can really just say, I'm not going to divorce you. I mean, eventually, a judge has to be like, okay, like, enforce the divorce, right?
- [47:12]
Ben
Yeah. If you really think about it. Heck of a rhyme. My name is Ben, I ain't in it. My name is Paul. It's up to y'. All. Yeah. You could delay the whole proceedings. Oh, I think we're still in love. I don't want to divorce her yet. I really still have strong feelings. I'm just going to hold off, and then you can play it out for a year. Another year.
- [47:28]
Coach
Yeah. And I told her, my name's Barry. I'm already married. Because, I mean, it was just like. She's like, so sorry about that.
- [47:36]
Ben
You're such a great listener. Can I have your number?
- [47:39]
Coach
Yeah.
- [47:40]
Ben
Since when are you a good listener?
- [47:41]
Coach
Dude, I didn't have a choice. There was no. Like. It wasn't like. She said, hey, do you want to hear my story? She just told me. And she goes, yeah, so sorry. It was so awkward. Like, it wasn't awkward for me because I had no idea what was going on. It was awkward for you, but you just wanted to turn around. And now you want me to know that he is not allowed to be with the kids by himself, and he failed a sobriety test, and he won't divorce you. So also, you're just trying to gather people on your side on this all star team. I don't know, but it was wild.
- [48:16]
Ben
That was a wild five minutes of your life. You went from kid baseball, nothing going on, kids playing with butterflies, to rocket show, and in divorce proceedings right in front of you.
- [48:31]
Coach
Yeah. Then her daughter picked up a bottle cap out of the dirt and was, like, looking at it and touching it and all this. She goes, why would you pick that up? Someone probably threw up right there on that Bottle cap. Now you have throw up on your hands and you're going to get sick.
- [48:47]
Ben
I mean, I'm with her. I would have said the same thing. Why would he divorce her? She sounds level headed.
- [48:53]
Coach
She seems very cool, calm and collective. Then her daughter said, mom, mom, can we have popsicles after this? She goes, I don't know, we'll see. She goes like, I really want a popsicle.
- [49:04]
Ben
Ask the maid.
- [49:05]
Coach
And she goes, I don't know if we have any popsicles at the house. She goes, mom, mom, but I really want a popsicle. She goes, if you ask me for another popsicle, I'm never gonna give you another popsicle for the rest of your life.
- [49:16]
Ben
What's wrong with that? That sounds like how my parents talk to me.
- [49:19]
Coach
I was like, oh, my. So she went from the throw up, you're gonna be sick to you will never get another popsicle in the rest of your life. And this dude doesn't want to divorce her. Wow. So he must like crazy.
- [49:29]
Ben
But also that life sounds miserable. That's so bad. The fact that he sits right next to the daughters. They don't talk to each other. They talk to the kids as a conduit to the other one. They play telephone through the kids. That's so bad for the kids and funny to laugh at, but good. Gosh, what a nightmare of a life. And you think she's hot. She's got it all together, dude. Her life sucks.
- [49:50]
Coach
No, no, you're right. Gosh, no, no, no. That's one of those ones where you had to decide how crazy you can put up with. She's like freaking hot. She is.
- [49:59]
Ben
Sounds like.
- [49:59]
Commercial Announcer
Actually,
- [50:02]
Coach
yeah.
- [50:03]
Ben
Something in my throat.
- [50:04]
Coach
Yeah, I mean, I would say the chest size was about the same. I'm telling you, dude, I was just like, wow. And then when she. I'm like, oh, my gosh. And then I noticed, yeah, no wedding ring. Okay. Now I'm putting it together. And I was just like, man, I got to get out of here.
- [50:19]
Ben
You mean vomit on the bottle cap just like you did. Word vomit.
- [50:22]
Coach
Oh, man. So, yeah, that was, that was my day at little league baseball, man. So that's all I got. Have fun in Vegas. Best of luck.
- [50:31]
Ben
Thank you.
- [50:32]
Coach
Spain is going to beat Argentina. You guys, don't fall in love with this Argentina story. The World cup is fixed. Spain is going to pass that ball all around them. They're not going to be able to have the possession. Messi's not going to be able to get his foot on the ball because they're going to pass circles around him. We've salt with France. Don't fall in love with offense. Defense wins championships. And we're going to be sad. The World Cup's going to be over. But I got my Harry Kane figurine right here. He just kicked another goal.
- [51:02]
Ben
The Is it even? I have a scoreboard in my kitchen, low key flex Christmas present and it shows all the scores and stuff. And for the soccer game it said even money. I think it's like a dead even heat, right?
- [51:14]
Coach
Oh, really? I don't know.
- [51:15]
Ben
I haven't looked it up, but I'm pretty sure it said minus 1:15. So it's like completely even teams, huh?
- [51:22]
Coach
Yeah, I have no idea. I haven't looked it up. I just am ready for the game. And then the third place match will be England versus France. I don't know if they will play their stars or not. Don't know. My dude, Harry Kane will be in there, but hopefully he scores a couple goals so my figurine will be worth more than 10 cents. All right, everybody, have a good weekend. Happy birthday, baby box. Bye.
- [51:47]
Ben
The question is, how have you never seen this lady before if they're on the same team?
- [51:51]
Coach
All Stars, totally different.
- [51:54]
Ben
Oh, I was like, so then maybe she's a bad parent if she's never gone to their games before.
- [51:59]
Coach
No, no. The kid was on a different team than my son. They're just together on the All Stars. And it was the first practice.
- [52:06]
Ben
How many practices do we got that it was.
- [52:09]
Coach
Well, that was first practice, man.
- [52:11]
Ben
More to come.
- [52:11]
Coach
I was like, golly, I can't wait to. I mean, if she told me that on the first practice, I could. I can't wait for the second practice.
- [52:20]
Ben
I mean, the second practice you're going to ask her for a Kleenex and she's going to pull panties out of
- [52:23]
Coach
her purse or she's going to reach in where her bra is and pull them out of there and be like, here you go, honey. I was just. Got some boob sweat on it. Sor. I was wild. Dude, I wish I could sneak a photo so you could see. I mean, she is really hot.
- [52:36]
Ben
You can. And we can post it just as long as you don't show her face. Like, there's nothing wrong with that. We cannot be sued. There's absolutely nothing wrong with that. For the truck drivers and I think that they would request you do that. And you can tell your wife it's for work.
- [52:50]
Coach
I mean, you know who would really like to see it? The tug boaters because at least truck drivers see lot lizards. What do tug boaters have
- [52:58]
Guest
got?
- [52:58]
Coach
Nothing.
- [52:59]
Ben
They got some beach whales. I'm telling you what. The truck drivers love that story. If they just drove through Louisville, they didn't even see it. They're already on the north side of Kentucky.
- [53:11]
Coach
Wow, man.
- [53:12]
Ben
Oh.
- [53:13]
Coach
All right. I don't know. What else you got? That's it. I'm out of here. Man, you gotta. Hey, what time's your flight tonight? Oh, so you're going home first?
- [53:22]
Ben
No, but when I told you there's gonna be no stories. I'm flying in at night.
- [53:26]
Coach
No, no.
- [53:27]
Ben
I'm there and I leave at 4am on Sunday.
- [53:31]
Coach
What?
- [53:31]
Ben
There will be no Stories from Vegas.
- [53:34]
Coach
4:00am you're an idiot. Like you are going to Vegas and you're leaving at 4am
- [53:44]
Ben
you gotta eliminate the devil, dude. Why would I stick around all day? Temptation.
- [53:51]
Coach
So your flight leaves at what, tonight
- [53:54]
Ben
at 5 and I get there at 7. I'm there all day Saturday and then leave at 4am Sunday.
- [54:01]
Coach
Hey, you have fun, man. My name is Bennett. I'm not doing that. No, that's not it. My name's been and I'm not in it. All right. We gotta go, dude. Hey. Sore losers Dot com. Get your tickets. The convention. Early bird pricing till July 31st. Sorry, the add ons are not up yet. The Preds not having a home game. We're gonna have to shuffle some things around, come up with a different Saturday night activity. Cause when we talk to the Preds, they kind of sounded like, oh, yeah, Saturday night's gonna be great. Gonna be great. Like they already knew they were gonna be having a game, but maybe they didn't and they were just giving us false hope.
- [54:33]
Ben
Yeah, but we still love the Predators if the conventions in Buffalo.
- [54:37]
Coach
Yeah, that's who they play, the Sabers. So, all right, everybody, have a good weekend. Sore losers. Dot com. We out. We already buzzed. Dude. You can just stop.
- [54:44]
Ben
Okay?
- [54:44]
Coach
Get that eye light. Here. You want me to get it for you? Here? Yeah, yeah. Close your eye.
- [54:48]
Ben
What do you think the street value of the Harry Kane is like less than a dollar.
- [54:52]
Coach
Less than a dollar. Less than a dollar.
- [54:54]
Ben
Welcome to Vegas. $19 ripoff.
- [54:58]
Coach
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- [56:59]
Coach
Earn your leisure when traveling for events or festivals throughout the country, every dollar matters. We compare flights, prices, hotel rates and restaurant options, so why wouldn't we compare rides? Personally, I always check Lyft before booking a ride.
- [57:13]
Ben
Prices can change throughout the day depending on traffic, weather and what's happening in the city.
- [57:18]
Coach
If you're headed to a concert, out
- [57:20]
Ben
to dinner or catching up with your friends on a Friday night, taking a
- [57:24]
Coach
few seconds to check Lyft could leave
- [57:25]
Ben
you with more money.
- [57:26]
Coach
To enjoy the experience, save money.
- [57:29]
Commercial Announcer
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