Boy Jail

Summary

Episode Summary: "Boy Jail" The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly | Release Date: June 10, 2025

In the "Boy Jail" episode of The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly, hosts Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly delve into the gritty and often humorous aspects of prison life, particularly focusing on the sexual dynamics and social hierarchies within male correctional facilities. Joined by caller Danny, who shares his firsthand experiences from his time in prison, the hosts navigate through sensitive topics with their trademark blunt humor and unfiltered honesty.

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1. Introduction to Prison Dynamics

The episode kicks off with a caller, Danny, sharing his experiences in prison, offering listeners an inside look into the complexities of inmate interactions and survival strategies.

• Danny's Perspective on Prison Life:
  • [05:24] Robert Kelly: "Not only did I. First of all, I'm gonna say this. Best vacation I've ever been. It's the best vacation."
  • Danny: "I done, I've been on minimum yards and I've been in, you know, yards with cells. I like the cells a lot better."

2. Sexual Hierarchies and Abuse in Prison

A significant portion of the discussion centers around the prevalence of sexual abuse and the mechanisms inmates use to protect themselves or assert dominance.

• Navigating Sexual Assault:

  • [14:09] Robert Kelly: "If you don’t want to get fucked in the ass, you can fight your way out."
  • Big Jay Oakerson: "You have to have like, you’re selling drugs or moving something or do stuff for the gangs or you can just do your time and not fuck with anybody in prison."

• Deterrence Tactics:

  • [15:05] Big Jay Oakerson: "I have to assume if you're going to a guy's ass that you've already negotiated in your head, there might be some mud on your."
  • Robert Kelly: "It's called a brown out, I think in the jail biz. Are you familiar with this, Danny, where you don't wipe your ass to make sure you don't get aggressively snuck butt fucked?"

3. Gang Affiliations and Racial Dynamics

The hosts and Danny explore how race and gang affiliations impact inmate experiences, including protection and victimization.

• Gang Influence:

  • [08:07] Robert Kelly: "Illegal. I think."
  • Big Jay Oakerson: "They don’t care. They don’t care. They’re island idiots."

• Racial Segregation:

  • [18:23] Robert Kelly: "Are you Spanish? Are you white?"
  • Christine (Danny): "I'm white."

4. Reflections on Gay Pride and Sexual Orientation

The conversation shifts towards the evolution of Gay Pride, both inside and outside prison walls, and its portrayal in media and public events.

• Gay Pride in Prison:

  • [37:17] Robert Kelly: "Together and they're shredded."
  • Big Jay Oakerson: "I think there is like this gay pride in prison?"

• Public Perceptions and Media:

  • [39:48] Big Jay Oakerson: "Now it's, you know, you got to worry about your Max going out to get a fucking soda on the corner. Ended up covered in rainbow lipstick on his wiener."

5. Anecdotes and Comedic Interludes

Throughout the episode, the hosts intersperse serious discussions with humorous anecdotes and playful banter, keeping the tone light despite the heavy subject matter.

• Celebrity Interactions:

  • [50:39] Robert Kelly: "Do you remember?"
  • Big Jay Oakerson: "Oh, yeah. No one’s getting raped. No one’s getting raped. A gay pride."

• Humorous Takes on Serious Topics:

  • [46:34] Robert Kelly: "He is gay."
  • Big Jay Oakerson: "Wendy Williams made it. Telling people who are gay. So why don't we start telling who is gay out there?"

6. Closing Remarks and Audience Engagement

As the episode wraps up, the hosts encourage listeners to engage with the show, share their own experiences, and tune into upcoming live shows and events.

• Encouraging Listener Interaction:
  • [60:25] Robert Kelly: "You just have to be a killer or get."
  • Big Jay Oakerson: "Any prisoner, just get out of prison. I need you to be there and hold my hand while I get tagged in the ass in an alley."

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Notable Quotes

• Big Jay Oakerson:

  • [04:00] "We started to get down. Then I was like, we don't have to be down."
  • [14:22] "You're gonna have to aggressively fuck him."

• Robert Kelly:

  • [14:09] "If you don't want to get fucked in the ass, you can fight your way out."
  • [37:33] "It's a dry heat."

• Danny (Caller):

  • [07:00] "I did a lot of terms in prison all over California."
  • [22:32] "There's some gay people on the yard that we would call punks."

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Conclusion

In "Boy Jail," Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly tackle the harsh realities of prison life with their signature blend of humor and candor. Through Danny's candid recounting of his experiences, listeners gain insight into the intricate social structures, the prevalence of sexual violence, and the coping mechanisms inmates employ. The episode not only highlights the challenges faced by prisoners but also underscores the importance of understanding and addressing these issues with both empathy and a touch of humor.

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Note: The hosts' discussions include sensitive and potentially triggering topics related to sexual violence and abuse in prison settings. Listener discretion is advised.

Transcript

[Big J Okerson]

Every day, our world gets a little.

[Robert Kelly]

More connected, but a little further apart. But then there are moments that remind us to be more human.

[Big J Okerson]

Thank you for calling Amica Insurance.

[Christine]

Hey, I was just in an accident.

[Big J Okerson]

Don't worry. We'll get you taken care of.

[Robert Kelly]

At Ameca, we understand that looking out.

[Big J Okerson]

For each other isn't new or groundbreaking. It's human.

[Robert Kelly]

Amica, empathy is our best policy.

[Big J Okerson]

The new McCrispy strip is here. Dip approved by ketchup. Tangy barbecue, Honey mustard. Honey mustard, Sprite, McFlurry, Big Mac sauce, double dipped in buffalo and Ranch, More ranch and creamy chili. McCrispy strip dip now at McDonald's. And now the bonfire with Big J Okerson and Robert Kelly.

[Robert Kelly]

Can't you just do Piano Man?

[Big J Okerson]

No, it's not. Not going to move the crowd. I mean, you got to bring up the thing. Christine, bring up.

[Robert Kelly]

First of all, Piano man always moves the crowd.

[Big J Okerson]

It does it always. You know what? I'm wrong. If I did Piano man, it would.

[Danny]

It'd be a real moment.

[Robert Kelly]

But you did Piano Man. The place would shut down.

[Big J Okerson]

It would be huge.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah.

[Danny]

You know what? Can you just do it?

[Big J Okerson]

Well, we're doing three nights. It'll be all right. Maybe one of those nights.

[Robert Kelly]

I will do the Piano Man. I'll play the piano. Because you didn't know that I played the piano.

[Big J Okerson]

I've already. You don't play the piano, buddy.

[Robert Kelly]

Whoa, stop. Yes, I do.

[Danny]

Piano Man. Piano.

[Robert Kelly]

I play. What? What does that mean?

[Big J Okerson]

Okay. You play Piano man on piano. Piano Man, I play.

[Robert Kelly]

You don't know that I play piano. You don't even know me.

[Big J Okerson]

You know Billy Joel's got dementia, so pretty soon we could all play piano as good as him. Don't worry, it's coming. I already bought a mask for this, so I have to live to the mask. The mask is going to be uncomfortable, but it's important. Christine, bring up that video, please. It's very stressful. It's the one from years ago. I watch it a lot.

[Robert Kelly]

I'm gonna go now to see you succeed at doing this or fail. Fail. If you fail, what are you gonna do? Because if you jump off the bike, you can't get back on.

[Big J Okerson]

No, no. It's back when he has the dread. Still, it's in our. It's. I watch it a lot. Don't you worry.

[Robert Kelly]

And this. Can you explain to the listeners so we don't get yelled at?

[Big J Okerson]

No, that's not it.

[Robert Kelly]

This is slipknot. We're gonna look at the video. There you go look at Bob Kelly back. Corporate Bob.

[Big J Okerson]

Skip to about minute.

[Robert Kelly]

Corporate Bob's back. Explain this video. We're a radio show.

[Big J Okerson]

Right there. That's good. I'm explaining. She just. I'm getting her to the right point. This is slipknot live 2002 performing I believe in London. And then he does that little part that I just did, but they stop it at the end. And this was when me and my ex wife, when Carla, we went on one of our earliest dates. I took her to see Slipknot.

[Robert Kelly]

This is a great concert.

[Big J Okerson]

And at this point, this place went nuts. They didn't do. I thought they did this song we had to see. But he didn't do this for the first time, so he doesn't do the part. And he spends the next four minutes making everybody get down. Go, Christine. You can skip ahead now a bit.

[Robert Kelly]

They did not do this at the concert we went to.

[Big J Okerson]

They did not do this.

[Robert Kelly]

No, because.

[Big J Okerson]

Bummer.

[Robert Kelly]

Well, no one wants to get down on the garden floor.

[Danny]

They did the song.

[Big J Okerson]

They did the song. They just. They just.

[Danny]

They didn't do it, like.

[Big J Okerson]

No. So they played the. They played the album straight through. That's what they did. They played the first album. That's what it was. So I think you can go right here. I'm gonna try to recreate this moment.

[Robert Kelly]

I'm gonna stand in the middle of the CR and be the only one that doesn't get down.

[Big J Okerson]

That's what me and Carla were. That's what me and my ex were. I didn't know what was going to happen. And then it was the most terrifying thing I've ever been a part of.

[Danny]

There was nothing in you that was like, we should probably get down. Everyone around us is down.

[Big J Okerson]

We started to get down. Then I was like, we don't have to be down. I don't know this band and I don't know what the fuck I have to get down for. And I. And then I saw some guys, though. What happened was I was locked in at that point. Once everyone is down, you're the one standing in the lawn. You can't go anywhere. And then this happened. I was like, let's get to the part already. And that'll be you, bobby, the little DJ in the middle of this audience. This is about 50,000 people. And then watch this energy. Yeah, Bobby. Yeah, we're surfing you.

[Robert Kelly]

I might. I might just watch from the sidelines.

[Big J Okerson]

I might jump in the audience at the end of this. You can now, but I got that mask.

[Robert Kelly]

If you did. You couldn't have done this last year.

[Big J Okerson]

And I'm making Josh wear the N with the big nose.

[Robert Kelly]

If you jump. If you jump. Last year before he lost the weight, you'd.

[Big J Okerson]

You would have kill people. Yeah, without a doubt. Oh, it's going to be great, though. Oh, we're going to bring it down.

[Robert Kelly]

Bobby, what's up, buddy?

[Big J Okerson]

Tell me about your vacate. Tell me everything. Leave out nothing. What happened? Did you have sex?

[Robert Kelly]

Not only did I. First of all, I'm gonna say this. Best vacation I've ever been. It's the best vacation.

[Big J Okerson]

No sex.

[Robert Kelly]

No, that was. There was two bad things about the vacation.

[Big J Okerson]

No sex. And if there was sex, it would have just been with your wife.

[Robert Kelly]

Which is the same. Yes. Bad sex, good sex. I mean. I mean, look, she read a lot, which is also. That's so. That gets me hard just seeing a chick, you know, she had a black bikini on, so there was black and then white stomach. She looked like an Oreo cookie. For most of the week.

[Big J Okerson]

Sure.

[Robert Kelly]

I was like, you got to tan that stomach because it looks gross.

[Big J Okerson]

Then she burned up, right?

[Robert Kelly]

Then she got a little tan on the stomach.

[Big J Okerson]

I was.

[Robert Kelly]

You got to get the front. You gotta. You gotta tan that little white patch up because it's bugging me.

[Big J Okerson]

But then if it starts to get red, do you worry about that? It's not gonna look good. Like that kind of that. Like that pinky red and then super white tits is weird.

[Robert Kelly]

Well, I am a fan of the.

[Big J Okerson]

Tan line.

[Robert Kelly]

The tan line, sure. I love it. And here's the thing.

[Big J Okerson]

But coming off of burn is not.

[Robert Kelly]

Well, she had. She had. We burnt up the first day a little bit. Then we eased off and then she tanned it up. She looked down. Dawn right now, naked looks good.

[Big J Okerson]

You don't have to tell me.

[Robert Kelly]

I mean, I wish you didn't say that. I don't know what. What does that mean? But anyways, the. Is she sending you pictures?

[Big J Okerson]

No. No. Me and your mom talk about how lovely your body is.

[Robert Kelly]

Oh, that's nuts. But is that on the.

[Big J Okerson]

The aura frame sometimes I said our videos of me going, dawn's got a lovely figure. I don't know what Bobby's bitching about. Dawn is a lovely figure.

[Robert Kelly]

Well, she's got nice cans.

[Big J Okerson]

Sure.

[Robert Kelly]

No, she looks great when she tans up. I get very attractive.

[Big J Okerson]

Where it needs to be over there.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, it is.

[Big J Okerson]

You don't have to tell me, dude, the little butt.

[Robert Kelly]

But I. Yeah, we had no sex at all. We got a suite too he had a separate room. But we. It was the best dude.

[Big J Okerson]

We were so just. Max whacked off a bunch.

[Robert Kelly]

Well, here's the funny part is that there was around 4:35 o' clock every day. Max said, hey guys, I'm going to the nap time. I'm gonna go chill for a little bit. And Don was like, why does he keep going up to the room? I was like, don, he's going up to. Just don't step. Don't use any of the towels near his bed.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Robert Kelly]

Because he's going upstairs.

[Big J Okerson]

Stop overthinking it. Just say see you, bud.

[Robert Kelly]

To nice relaxing time by himself. He's man. He's having a good time. So let him do his thing. So around 4:35 o' clock. Hey guys, I'm going to. I'll be back. I'm just going to go.

[Big J Okerson]

It's an Aruba meat beat. It's a tradition.

[Robert Kelly]

We. What is now, it wasn't last year.

[Big J Okerson]

A Reuben meat beat.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah. It was not last year. It was the best dude. We did. We did something one day and then nothing the next. You understand?

[Big J Okerson]

Sure.

[Robert Kelly]

So we planned like wave runners the second day we were there.

[Big J Okerson]

That's fun. And next day, everybody got their own wave runner.

[Robert Kelly]

Well, Don jumped on the back with me.

[Big J Okerson]

Okay.

[Robert Kelly]

And Max got his own.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Robert Kelly]

Which was crazy, cuz.

[Big J Okerson]

Illegal. I think.

[Robert Kelly]

100%.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Robert Kelly]

He said he was 16. He lied. Who gives a. These people don't care.

[Big J Okerson]

They don't care. They're island idiots. He could have been the king of that place. The stupid fucking Arubans.

[Robert Kelly]

He drove. He drove the. I got a four wheeler.

[Big J Okerson]

They couldn't solve the most obvious murder in history.

[Robert Kelly]

They solved it. They didn't want to. It's the only murder they've ever had on that island.

[Big J Okerson]

The guy confessed eight different times and they still never got him on that. He's still. He's in jail for a girl he killed in Peru. He's not even in trouble for Natalee Holloway.

[Robert Kelly]

Still, I think he's dead. No, I think he's dead.

[Big J Okerson]

Don't you dare.

[Robert Kelly]

I swear to God, I think he's dead.

[Big J Okerson]

His brother just got promoted. Big promotion.

[Robert Kelly]

I think he's dead. I'm pretty sure he dead.

[Big J Okerson]

Do you think that was the thing? You think his brother wouldn't get promoted until he killed his brother?

[Robert Kelly]

I don't know, but he's definitely. Yeah. Is he dead? Is not dead serving a prison sentence? Remember Patrice's j. Oh, it is for.

[Big J Okerson]

The murder of Natalee Holloway. Are they sure?

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, they got him.

[Big J Okerson]

What about. I thought the other girl serving in Peru, but that's weird.

[Robert Kelly]

He. He admitted to the Natalie thing, and he. When he. But he had caught for the Peru girl. You remember Patrice's joke about that, how racist people are? And he goes, well, what's that? Chicken Aruba that got killed. Everybody yells out, natalie Holloway. He goes, what's that other. That black bitch in Peru? He goes, they were like, exactly. You racist piece of.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, no one remembers that girl's name.

[Robert Kelly]

No, she's the Peru chick.

[Big J Okerson]

He got attacked in jail in 2024. He got injured.

[Robert Kelly]

No, I thought he got killed.

[Big J Okerson]

I worry about that, by the way, Every time you think maybe jail, they're overhyping. How dangerous and scary it is. You see what's the guy that shot Megan Thee Stallion? Allegedly shot Megan Thee Stallion in the foot. Got stabbed like 14 times in jail. Black low. You grabbed your mic. This is black news. Yes. Tory Lanez is who you're talking about. And that video is terrifying. He gets stabbed, like 14 times. Right?

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, sorry.

[Big J Okerson]

It's fucking crazy.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

And he's, like, famous.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

Ish. Not to me. The point of Tory Lane's three times for me to know the. You're talking about, like, oh, the one who shot Megan Thee Stallion. I know she is because of that booty. She got that fat booty. But she's gotten thinner enough. That black Lou likes her now. Delicious.

[Robert Kelly]

And I like her. I like. I don't like a fat bow tie.

[Big J Okerson]

Megan the Stallion. She might be a lot for you.

[Robert Kelly]

I mean, a lot.

[Big J Okerson]

She might be too much for you.

[Robert Kelly]

I wonder, buddy.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, there's. Tory Lane's getting stabbed in prison.

[Robert Kelly]

Is this him getting stabbed so much?

[Big J Okerson]

He gets stabbed so much.

[Robert Kelly]

So. Okay, what is this? What? Where is this?

[Big J Okerson]

It's in prison.

[Robert Kelly]

But what prison? What prison has video?

[Big J Okerson]

Let's say. Let's start using the clues. Let's use the clues and see which prison this is. Let's see. It's mostly blacks and Hispanics in there.

[Robert Kelly]

California.

[Big J Okerson]

Okay.

[Robert Kelly]

It's gotta be California.

[Big J Okerson]

Hang on. Whittle this down. Wow. The Aryan nation seems to be represented. Blacks, Hispanics, very few Asians.

[Robert Kelly]

What is in front. Is that a mirror in front of the stabbing?

[Big J Okerson]

Could this be any prison in the globe?

[Robert Kelly]

It says what prison he's in, right?

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Danny]

Let me look.

[Big J Okerson]

Well, he might not say it now because he's gonna get stabbed again. You put on a wig and change his name. I wonder why I got stabbed in prison so many times. So if the stabbings, the wild stabbings and violence are real, why are we to say the butt fucking is not real? The aggressive gay sex that they force you into. Force, force.

[Robert Kelly]

Now let me ask a question. If you went to jail, would you be a shock collar or would you be. Would you have little pigtails and give up that puss?

[Big J Okerson]

There's no in between.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

Can't just like chill by myself and be the guy who reads and like trains birds to do stuff.

[Robert Kelly]

Now that guy doesn't exist. That was old school jail.

[Big J Okerson]

No.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, he's gone.

[Big J Okerson]

No, but I talk to the birds.

[Robert Kelly]

You're going to pick a race. I would say you, you would pick the black race.

[Big J Okerson]

I might, I might play retarded.

[Robert Kelly]

If you play retarded, they're going to not have you. They're going to, they're going to fuck you anyways.

[Big J Okerson]

No. Yeah, I'm going to fuck a retarded guy. There's no reason to.

[Robert Kelly]

Why not? It's funner.

[Big J Okerson]

Well, I don't understand. Yay is prison, but fucking for pleasure. Call in the show if you've been to prison and witnessed or been a part of aggressive buttfucking and don't call them with your bullshit story.

[Robert Kelly]

Eight, six, six, nine, six, nine. 1969.

[Big J Okerson]

Nice. If you have 1969.

[Robert Kelly]

I got it.

[Big J Okerson]

Nine, six, nine. 1969.

[Robert Kelly]

You, you, you have to, you have to be a killer or get.

[Big J Okerson]

No.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, that's my question.

[Big J Okerson]

That's what I'm saying. Where's the in between?

[Robert Kelly]

You have to, then you have to be the guy that gets people.

[Big J Okerson]

But how are you looked at as like, you got to be butt guys in a certain way to be deemed like the cool butt fucker where they're not looking at you as like, I think this guy's gay. He's just having sex with guys constantly. Someone's got to be there to go, no, he just fucks people who owe him to let them know you don't. He doesn't hold debts like that. You're gonna get fucked in the ass. Like, it's like, it's a masculine thing. I'm bitching you out, but because you owe me money and you can't afford to pay it. But I don't know how you can trick people in that sense. I would go, you just had sex with a guy, man.

[Robert Kelly]

But what it. But here's the thing. When you fucking guys in jail is not gay.

[Big J Okerson]

No, it's gay.

[Robert Kelly]

It's gay when you come out. If you do it, if you continue to do it.

[Big J Okerson]

No, it's gay. It's gay. And I know that inside they're gonna say it's not gay. But that's my point. I think it has to be put under the guise. If you want to have gay sex in prison, the move is you make it like, let me loan a guy. It's almost like doing the right thing. You loan a guy some money.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

And then you know he can't pay you back. And then you go, hey, I need that money back, like today. And when he goes, no, then you go, I'm fucking you to prove a point. But it's just because you love him. You want to kiss him on the back and shit.

[Robert Kelly]

But what if he was like, yo, man, I'm going to fuck you. I ain't giving you shit. And you're going to give me more money. Now I'm fucking you, Jay. Hey, Jay.

[Big J Okerson]

Then you're going to have to aggressively fuck him. Yeah. You're going to have to take his ass.

[Robert Kelly]

So you're going to. You either take an ass or give an ass.

[Big J Okerson]

You're gonna get prison raped. Yeah, I guess if you fight back and say, I'm gonna, in fact, be fucking your ass.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

I don't think. Yeah. Remember Ted, Alexandra had that great joke about that.

[Robert Kelly]

What was that?

[Big J Okerson]

He would say if he went to jail, he just. He goes, I'd be a difficult rape because I would just try to rape them back. And they would just go in a circle and he goes. And then the word would spread that I'm a difficult rape. And they'd go. They go, hey, that new guy goes, do you know that guy? If you had to rape that guy, he rapes you back. He goes, rape you back. Can you do that? He does it.

[Robert Kelly]

It's not worth it. It's not worth it.

[Big J Okerson]

To rape.

[Robert Kelly]

Big J is just a pain in.

[Big J Okerson]

The ass to way he worded that. He goes, you can do that. He does it.

[Robert Kelly]

What if you just put Kept in your ass all the time, like a rape deterrent, Almost like bear spray.

[Big J Okerson]

I have to assume if you're going to a guy's ass that you've already negotiated in your head, there might be some mud on your. There's going to be mud on your pickle.

[Robert Kelly]

There's going to be mud for sure, but not. But if you have a lot of mud up there. Like if you pack it up there and the guy takes it out and he's like, yeah. And then he's. It's almost like when you get bear Sprayed your eyes. You know what I mean? If you take. If I was gonna rape you and I pulled your pants down and there was poop all in there, I'd be like, I'm out. I'm not doing this right.

[Big J Okerson]

You draw lines, though. You know what I mean? Like, I don't think I. And also, I have to say, and I'm. Correct me if I'm wrong. This is not me being racially insensitive at all. I'm saying I don't think your average black wiener is gonna be shallow enough. It's like, there's gonna be. It goes far enough that you couldn't empty your colon out enough to not get a little turd on your black wiener.

[Robert Kelly]

But you're known, see? You're known. What if they're fans of the bonfire and they know how clean your asshole is?

[Big J Okerson]

If they're in, prison's probably skank's fans.

[Robert Kelly]

What if they know they're like, yo, man, I heard this guy on a podcast. His asshole's tight and clean. It's so clean deep up. He cleans it out every time he takes a poop.

[Big J Okerson]

It is my ass always clean. But I will warn you this. It's got, like, a pulling in thing with. I've only learned this with suppositories. It's got a. It, like, it pulls in.

[Robert Kelly]

It's turning me on. Why would I not want that? Why would I not want a muscle that pulls it in?

[Big J Okerson]

You might get stuck is what I'm worrying about.

[Robert Kelly]

Like what, like a Chinese thumb torture?

[Big J Okerson]

Yes. And then I gotta walk to. And then I have to go to my one hour of recipe with a guy strapped to my asshole. Oh, we have a call. Did he get fucked in jail?

[Danny]

He says he has some truth.

[Big J Okerson]

He has some truth for y' all. Oh, I like that. Dante Nero, Danny in San Diego. I'm gonna be in San Diego in two weeks. Hey, you think this guy's gonna fuck me?

[Robert Kelly]

I hope he does, Danny.

[Big J Okerson]

I hope you don't try to fuck me. Not a chance. Oh, thank God. Well, now can I be honest with you? Now, that hurt my feelings a little bit.

[Robert Kelly]

That hurt my feelings. Why wouldn't you want to fuck Jay? Jay has a beautiful asshole.

[Christine]

Yeah, not that I haven't heard a lot about his asshole.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah. Just so you know, we don't have to have sex, Danny, but it would be beautiful if we did.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

Geez Louise.

[Robert Kelly]

You don't have to reject him, Danny. You can say I would, but I'm just not into It.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah. I'm not in the guys, or else I would totally.

[Christine]

I might be able to wear that as a badge of honor, huh? That I had sex with Big J. I do.

[Robert Kelly]

I do. I wear it as a badge Bobby.

[Big J Okerson]

Keeps around his boy scout sash.

[Robert Kelly]

How do you think I got this job? He wanted Mike Fenoya. I said, no, no, no. I got these video.

[Big J Okerson]

Mike Fenoya wouldn't lay with a man. It says, Danny did 22 years all in. Like, in and out.

[Christine]

It says, yeah, I don't like doing. Doing drugs and crime was basically my way of life for a lot of years when I was young and dumb. And so I did a lot of terms in prison all over California.

[Big J Okerson]

All over California. And was it because we were trying to see if this prison was in California. We're just looking at. Was it mostly blacks and Hispanics with the Aryan Nation typed in there somewhere? Okay, okay. All right. So maybe this was California, Bob. We were looking at.

[Robert Kelly]

First of all, they have Puerto Ricans out here, not Hispanics.

[Big J Okerson]

Okay?

[Robert Kelly]

New York has Puerto Ricans and Dominicans. No, Hispanics.

[Big J Okerson]

No, there's Hispanics.

[Robert Kelly]

They don't call them Hispanics.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, yeah?

[Robert Kelly]

What are you, Cristella Alonzo?

[Big J Okerson]

She got hot, huh?

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, she did.

[Big J Okerson]

What happened to her?

[Robert Kelly]

It's called Instagram.

[Big J Okerson]

Things.

[Robert Kelly]

Filters, filters. Hey, Danny, are you Spanish? Are you white?

[Christine]

I'm white.

[Robert Kelly]

You're white. So you did. You have to. Because certain prisons out there, you have to. You have to go with your race, but other prisons, you don't have to. Right?

[Christine]

Pretty much the California system was, if you did it, then you kind of left yourself hanging out there to be victimized. So you kind of did, you know, just by default. You didn't have to, like, join the Aryan Brotherhood or the Nazi Lowriders or anything like that, but you did kind of have to stick with your own people. And then you. Then they break it down to, like, you stick with your homies that are from San Diego, you know, we call it a car.

[Big J Okerson]

Danny, real quick. What are the Nazi Lowriders? Christine, can you look that up? I never even heard of that.

[Robert Kelly]

Is that Spanish? Nazis.

[Danny]

White power.

[Christine]

It's a prison gang out here, okay?

[Big J Okerson]

They're a white power gang. The Nazi Lowriders. Now who's more fun? Those are the Aryan Nation.

[Robert Kelly]

I was a Nazi lowrider. They got a better name.

[Big J Okerson]

I know, but I feel like the Aryan Nation now. I feel like American History X was more of the Aryan Nation, and those guys were. I don't know if, you know, were pretty good at Basketball good enough to take the court away from the black people of the area in a very legit fair game that ended in a 5 foot 5 guy doing a reverse dunk. And so I assume that would be more fun. The Nazi lowriders seem like they're too militant.

[Danny]

Wait, it's not all under the Aryan Nation like the Aryan Nation umbrella and you have like the Nazi low rider, Christine?

[Big J Okerson]

I don't know. You used to suck them all off. You tell us just one. Did you not get any information while you were blowing these Nazis back in the day?

[Robert Kelly]

You blew a Nazi?

[Christine]

They're different.

[Robert Kelly]

Clicks what is that? What is that? A dancing Nazi?

[Big J Okerson]

Neo Nazi? It's a Nazi who likes Disney.

[Robert Kelly]

Is that a Nazi from the 80s? Yeah, the lowrider Nazis seem like they meet at a Denny's on weekend with all their nice old cars.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, the lowriders. Yeah.

[Robert Kelly]

Yo, we're gonna meet motherfucker.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, the nl. The NLR Car club. That doesn't sound quite as bad as Nazi lowriders. Okay, so. So you didn't have to join either of those. You were able to just kind of be with the other whites. I would try to find the old guys who read and give advice to the young bucks.

[Christine]

You know, I'll say this, man. For the most part, people leave the old guys alone. Yeah, old dude. And nobody's victimized nobody because people there's, there's in a whole prison yard, there's a lot of guys that are like, that were like me, you know, I mean we're caught up in the dope and caught up in the doing to support our habit. But we weren't like evil, you know what I mean?

[Big J Okerson]

Sure.

[Christine]

That wanted to just hurt other people all day long. There is those, there's a few of them, but there's not as many of them as, you know, decent hearted people. So it's a, it's a trip. It's a complicated situation. Now those, those ones that can stir up the yard and cause riots, you know, the, the knucklehead ones. Sure. But. But for the most part it's kind of like people just stick to their own, do your own thing, stay out of other people's business and you know, just kind of.

[Robert Kelly]

Did you have a time? Did you ever sell like. Oh, were you in like a room with like bunk beds?

[Christine]

I, I done, I've been on minimum yards and I've been in, you know, yards with cells. I like the cells a lot better.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, I bet.

[Robert Kelly]

Did you ever walk in and have a selly where you're like, ah, fuck, this guy's gonna be a problem. Or all your cellies good. And I say cellies like, I've been in prison.

[Big J Okerson]

You were in boy prison?

[Robert Kelly]

I was in.

[Christine]

Not really. It was, you know, you get to know somebody and then you realize, yeah, I gotta get a cell change.

[Big J Okerson]

Danny, sounds like you're getaway driving a crime right now.

[Robert Kelly]

Just robbed about.

[Big J Okerson]

Sorry, guys, I'm getting away driving a bank robbery as we speak week now. Now that the question we all want to know. Danny, gay sex, is it happening non stop? No. Does it happen at all?

[Christine]

There's some, there is some. There's some gay people on the yard that we would call punks that they would, you know, enforce. Then sometimes some straight dudes or whatever would hook up with them and move them in their cell and all that. But, you know, whatever. A guy's doing life, right, who cares? But for the most part, no.

[Big J Okerson]

But it wasn't just like in the shower one day you owe a guy a couple bucks and he thinks the retaliation is your ass. I feel like it's going to be violence before that.

[Christine]

Yes.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Robert Kelly]

So. So if you don't want to get fucked in the ass, you can fight your way out.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah. No, I think what he's saying is no one's constantly trying to fuck your ass the way we're imagining.

[Robert Kelly]

So if a guy, if a guy's trying to fuck your ass and you're fighting, but then you're giving in and then you're fighting again, is that like a turn on? Is that a. Is that a wanted thing? In prison, do you still. Can you get, can you get respect where you're like, I tried to fight, but then he. Then I presented and then I tried to fight again?

[Big J Okerson]

No. You know, I hearken back to American history X again.

[Robert Kelly]

Nice.

[Big J Okerson]

When they, when the Nazis butt fucked Edward Norton in the shower, there was a conversation between. I believe it was a four man project. One, two, one for each limb. Three, four, five guys. So one guy told four other guys, he goes, hey, you guys wouldn't mind. I'm gonna fuck a guy in the ass in the shower. I need you to hold him down. And then, by the way, I don't know if you remember the scene. Bobby comes quick.

[Robert Kelly]

Why wouldn't you? It's probably a nice tight butt.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah. I mean, Edward Norton was built in that movie.

[Robert Kelly]

Shredded.

[Big J Okerson]

If there was any time. Yeah.

[Robert Kelly]

It would take 25 minutes to come in our ass.

[Big J Okerson]

It would take so long to come in my ass. Unless you like Soft ladies. I think black guys would love me.

[Robert Kelly]

In prison do now do you have to shower with other men in prison? Is it one big open shower like that?

[Christine]

Yeah.

[Robert Kelly]

Okay, sometimes.

[Christine]

Sometimes they're. Sometimes they're single ones. But like you would just jump in with the homie just because you're trying to get a shower real quick and get back to yourself.

[Robert Kelly]

Oh, jumping with another guy in a single just to get it over with.

[Christine]

Wasn't any day about it.

[Big J Okerson]

Did everybody laugh at the people who had little wieners? No, no.

[Christine]

Majority of people.

[Big J Okerson]

Full on. Full on acceptance. Is it full on acceptance happening there? Because maybe this is a place I could go.

[Christine]

It is in fact, in fact, if a new homie rolls up on the yard and jumps in the shower with you and has a big strong, he gets compliments.

[Big J Okerson]

What a great place.

[Christine]

Stay away from my girlfriend.

[Big J Okerson]

Damn, man.

[Robert Kelly]

Now were they. Were there gay guys in there like Tracy Morgan in the longest yard where they dress like they were definitely gay wanted. They were the.

[Christine]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

He. She's. Yeah.

[Christine]

They'd roll up their shirt and have shorts all in their crack and tuck their. And some of you looked. You're like, damn, looks like a woman.

[Robert Kelly]

They would make Daisy Dukes.

[Christine]

Been a few years, you know.

[Robert Kelly]

Wow.

[Big J Okerson]

And how fast do the guards get involved if someone was getting butt, do they have to go like, do they get involved or they just like finish up and let's get out of here?

[Christine]

Well, if it's a fight, they're gonna.

[Big J Okerson]

Come right away for fights. They'll come, but not a butt fuck.

[Robert Kelly]

God, man, what a.

[Christine]

Well, I would hope that if two people are willingly participating in that they wouldn't do it in front of.

[Robert Kelly]

So. So there's guys having sex with each other in jail, but quietly. It's. It's, you know, hey, we're gonna fuck tonight. And there. And you guys, you guys hear them banging.

[Christine]

I never heard it.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, so you had to just jerk off the thoughts that sucks of it.

[Christine]

But I never heard it personally, I.

[Big J Okerson]

Bet you could smell it. Where do you jerk off, Danny? Where do you wet.

[Robert Kelly]

Does it smell like pennies? And where do you.

[Big J Okerson]

Copper, Danny, where do you jerk off in that son bitch right now?

[Christine]

Well, if you, if you're. If you got a cell, you get some. Get, take, take advantage of when you got cell time when your cell. He's out at work or he leaves to go to the yard, you stay in.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, if you ever walking on somebody jerking off in jail, you got to give them the room back again. You come in, you Go. Oh, sorry, dude. You go. Sorry, dude. Finish your thing.

[Robert Kelly]

It's kind of what my son did this week on a vacation in Aruba. Yeah, he was like, I'm gonna go use the cell for a couple minutes.

[Big J Okerson]

Because my cellies are outside. Time to slam the ham.

[Robert Kelly]

Hey, did you ever get caught wanking.

[Big J Okerson]

It.

[Christine]

By a female guard? Once.

[Robert Kelly]

Wow.

[Big J Okerson]

Perfect.

[Christine]

I know, it's kind of a turn on.

[Big J Okerson]

Goddamn right.

[Christine]

It was kind of gave me a look and kept walking. I was like, okay, wow.

[Big J Okerson]

Did she give you a look like, nice piece or just like, what are you doing? Either one would work for me, by the way.

[Christine]

Yeah, yeah. What are you doing?

[Big J Okerson]

What are you doing? It's supposed to be like this and then she takes over. God, that would have been so much harder. That's exactly what he fantasized about, though. As soon as she walked away, he's like, let me help you with that. Was she hot or was she a big fat pig? It wouldn't matter when you're in jail.

[Christine]

She was decent.

[Big J Okerson]

That's what always happens to these poor, these poor fat, ugly prison guard ladies. These jacked and in shape and good looking prisoners make them think that they're worth something because they'll fuck anything while they're in jail. Then they help them escape and then they never see them again and they just ruin the prison guard's life. Did you any things like that? Anybody, a prisoner or something there that was like, shouldn't have. That seems to happen all the time.

[Christine]

I seen, I, I have seen a couple female correctional officers get escorted off the yard, but I think it might have been more for bringing in drugs, but it could have been that too.

[Big J Okerson]

In their holes.

[Robert Kelly]

But hey, Danny, Danny, doesn't everybody have to have. Hey, Dan, doesn't everybody have to have a thing in jail that you do? Don't you have to like, like, don't.

[Big J Okerson]

You have to like deserted island?

[Robert Kelly]

No, but like, you can't just be professor.

[Big J Okerson]

You can't do Star.

[Robert Kelly]

I got it. We got it. Don't you have to have like, like you, you're. You're selling drugs or moving something or do stuff for the gangs or do you, you can just do your time and not fuck with anybody in prison.

[Big J Okerson]

Skipper, the Farmers.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, you can.

[Christine]

All right, but you know, when you're young, when you're young, like I was, you're, like I said, you're part of, you're part of your San Diego homies. You're part of the, that, that group. And if that group ever, ever has problems with another group. Then you kind of have to show up, right? Or then. Or you get. You get Ixnade from the car, and then it's. Then it's no good.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah. Well, we meet, me and Jay, and all of us are like that. Out front with Bennington show. They showed up today on 49th Street. We were like, yo, man.

[Big J Okerson]

Swept their lunches out of their hands.

[Robert Kelly]

They were like, yo, man, beat it.

[Big J Okerson]

48 over here, black girl. And I slapped his lunch tray down. Yeah. And then I. His ass right there on the sidewalk.

[Robert Kelly]

I was right next to him holding black girl's legs apart.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, he kept his own. He kept his own hands on the wall. I think a part of him liked it. Danny. Danny, you're clean and sober now.

[Christine]

Oh, no.

[Robert Kelly]

Oh, Jesus.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm sorry.

[Christine]

Oh, no. There you are.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, you. Thought I said, are you clean and sober now?

[Christine]

Oh, yeah, Yeah. I don't do drugs.

[Big J Okerson]

Hell yeah. You learned your lesson. That's good.

[Robert Kelly]

How long you been out?

[Christine]

My own company. Been married 18 years. Since 2007.

[Robert Kelly]

2007. Now, do your kids know about your past?

[Christine]

I don't have any because I was too busy being in there to ever have any. And I'm glad I didn't because they'd probably present like their dad. But I have. My wife has three kids that are older and then grandkids. So I got a family going on, and it's fun.

[Robert Kelly]

Do they know about. Do the kids know?

[Christine]

Yeah, they know.

[Big J Okerson]

They probably think it's so cool.

[Robert Kelly]

They probably don't fuck around at all.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, because they think it's so cool. Until you inevitably murder their mother for drugs.

[Robert Kelly]

I'm gonna tell Max I was in real jail just to keep him in line.

[Big J Okerson]

No, dude, you were in boy jail. That'll resonate with him more now because he's a boy.

[Robert Kelly]

His boy jail.

[Big J Okerson]

Now you don't have any answers about man jail, Bobby. Then they call Uncle Danny for that.

[Robert Kelly]

Well, here's the thing. You don't, you know, you don't fuck somebody in boy jail because you're getting out in three months. You're just gay.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

I mean, yeah.

[Robert Kelly]

You're like, I'm gonna suck your dick for cigarettes. It's like, well, you're getting out in a week. You could wait.

[Big J Okerson]

Bobby, you must been a while since you smoked cigarettes. You remember that addiction? If I was in jail for a week, that's what I was gonna ask. Danny, when you were on drugs, did you get. Were you able to get drugs in prison? Hey, everybody have you noticed that everywhere you go it seems like prices are going up. They keep saying it. The grocery store, your cars, your appliances, everything is through the roof right now. Wouldn't it be nice if prices would go down? Well, at Metro, they've got your back. They've lowered their prices and are giving you a five year price guarantee on talk, text and data. One line now 20% lower. Family plans also lowered and you also get a free 5G phone, all with no ID required and no activation fees. Stop by your neighborhood Metro store, Visit metro by t-mobile.com or call to find out about their amazing offers. Bring your number not available if currently at T Mobile or with Metro in the past 180 days. Guarantee covers monthly price of on network, Talk, text and 5G data for customers activating on an eligible plan. Exclusions apply. Details at metro by t-mobile.com in the summer, all of Oregon is our playground thanks to our incredible park system. That's why it's so cool that organ lottery gameplay like video lottery or cash pop helps support tons of parks projects statewide like accessible trails at Silver Falls State park or upgrades to your favorite dog park in Newburgh. It's just one way a little lottery play for many Oregonians can add up to a lot of good the Oregon Lottery. Together we do good things. Lottery games are based on chance and should be played for entertainment only. Must be 18 or older to plate. Craftsman days are here at Lowe's with big savings on the tools you need right now. Get a free select tool when you buy the Craftsman V22 pack battery kit. Whether it's the backyard, the bathroom or beyond, Craftsman has the tools to help you power through and get the project done right because diying is unpredictable. But your tools shouldn't be Shop Craftsman at Lowe's today valid through 618, while supplies last. Selection varies by location. This summer, Instacart is bringing back your favorites from 1999 with prices from 1999. That means 90s prices on juice pouches that ought to be respected, 90s prices on box Mac and cheese and 90s prices on ham, cheese and cracker lunches. Enjoy all those throwbacks and more at throwback prices only through Instacart. $4.72 maximum discount per $10 of eligible items. Limit three offers per order. Expire September 5th while supplies last. Discount based on CPI comparison.

[Christine]

I personally wasn't I didn't have any connections, but you can buy. Yeah, you can buy them because man.

[Big J Okerson]

If I was in prison I would say that's what I would do. I get hooked on drugs. Because I bet getting the drugs in jail and doing drugs in jail is such a great feeling because you really get to escape the shittiest thing for a little bit.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, but that's when you get into the sex. That's when you get into the getting fucked for the sex.

[Big J Okerson]

Well, once I'm whacked down the drugs, Bobby, then I'm a little more open to the gay sex.

[Robert Kelly]

That's true.

[Big J Okerson]

And before you know it, I'm running Nazi low Riders. That's right.

[Robert Kelly]

With your ass.

[Big J Okerson]

That's right. Just don't tell mam. Rosenberg that her little grandson, the baby that she helped raise, is the head of the Nazi lowriders. Yes. Black Louisiana, what's up? Shit, dude, get shot. You wanna get butt fucked? Mike from Atlanta has a fantastic question for Danny. I think it's in reference to what Bobby was talking about before, about not wiping your ass. Oh, does not wiping your ass protect you from getting butt fucked? It's called a brown out, I think in the jail biz. Are you familiar with this, Danny, where you don't wipe your ass to make sure you don't get aggressively snuck butt fucked?

[Robert Kelly]

That's what we call all the award shows.

[Christine]

I think the east coast is a whole nother story than the West Coast.

[Big J Okerson]

Nice. Whole nother story. Holy.

[Robert Kelly]

Well, I don't like that you're saying the east coast is just a bunch.

[Big J Okerson]

Of steers and queers over here. Yeah, that's it, dude. Just a bunch of butt blacks and Puerto Ricans in prison. Not out there in California. Dude. Nice weather. They're in a better mood.

[Robert Kelly]

It's a dry heat.

[Big J Okerson]

It is. It's got to be a better mood.

[Robert Kelly]

It's a dry heat.

[Big J Okerson]

Are you happy you were in California prison, Danny, versus say like a fucking Kansas or some shit? Or where's that place? Where's the place with Arizona where you make sure we're pink like a lady Sleep outside?

[Christine]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

Sheriff Joe Arapayo.

[Robert Kelly]

Is that. Is that Arizona?

[Big J Okerson]

I think it's Arizona, yeah. He makes them sleep outside in the heat and wear pink like ladies. And then he walks around them like. He walks around like, like. What was that lady who. Just like those people who have like zoos that they're just like, no, I trust all these animals. And you're like, you know that rhinoceros can kill you with one move of its arm. It's like. But then he wouldn't do that to me. And then it happens to them inevitably. Fucking. Well, Danny, we're glad you're out. We glad you turn your life around.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah. Glad you didn't get fucked.

[Big J Okerson]

But I'm glad you didn't have kids. But you still get to beat someone else's kids. I appreciate that. That's nice.

[Christine]

I didn't think. I didn't think I'd get through. This is pretty easy. I like. This is the first time I ever called a radio show.

[Big J Okerson]

Well, you're the only prisoner who listens to us. Thank you, Danny. I'm glad you didn't get your butt. I'm glad you have drugs.

[Christine]

Last year at the American Comedy Store. I'm still waiting to see Bobby, but I might catch you in a couple weeks.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm gonna be there in two weeks, buddy.

[Robert Kelly]

I was just there three weeks.

[Christine]

Comedy Store again.

[Big J Okerson]

Absolutely. American Comedy Company again. We'll go find someone to butt on the street. We'll take it.

[Robert Kelly]

Do me a favor. Take Jay's ass when you see him. Just take it a little bigger than me.

[Christine]

It might be a challenge.

[Robert Kelly]

Here's the thing, dude.

[Big J Okerson]

Nah, I'm not gonna fight.

[Robert Kelly]

Nah, he's not gonna fight. Push him up against a brick wall outside in an alley and just stick your hands down the back of his jeans, buddy.

[Big J Okerson]

The green room. The green room in American Comedy Company has a tabletop. Ms. Pac Man. I'll lay on that. And you just come in the little secret room and have me be safe, my man. And we'll talk to you soon. Thanks, Danny.

[Christine]

Take care.

[Robert Kelly]

Is it. Is it bad that I'm bummed out that there's not a lot of ass raping in prison?

[Big J Okerson]

That I thought, well, I mean, it's happening. I just thought there was. I thought there was. That gays have gotten so much braver now, just being loud and proud. Like, if you go to prison gay, there's a faction of guys waiting there for you that are also gay, that are like, you know, get over here, bitch. And then they all fucking gay off.

[Robert Kelly]

Together and they're shredded.

[Big J Okerson]

Right? This was probably more like in the 60s, 70s, where people weren't outwardly probably being closeted, some of that aggressive gay fucking, but now you could just. There's guys that are probably there waiting to be fucked.

[Robert Kelly]

So you think there's like this gay pride in prison?

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, yeah, yeah. They're really priding up. When I see gay pride thing the other day, I'm like, I don't think we need this.

[Robert Kelly]

It's Gay Pride month.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, but it was Gay Pride month. But it was something celebrating Gay Pride Month. Like, why, like, oh, was it when we went to the movies yesterday? We saw a movie yesterday and it was like, Cinemark celebrates Gay Pride Month. And it was just like a commercial of just like, guy, guy couples and girl girl couples. Like, but mostly guy guy couples. They always hear the most jarring ones and just talk about it. I'm like, why is this a thing? And are we eventually gonna not have Gay Pride Month? Will it eventually go into the ether because it's so normal?

[Robert Kelly]

Well, I mean, I think it's there now. Even the Gay Pride parade is just a fucking parade. It's not a. It used to be.

[Big J Okerson]

No, it's a wild. It's a moving sex orgy coming down Fifth Street. Hide your children.

[Robert Kelly]

I didn't say it was a hot parade. It's a fucking hot parade because DJ.

[Big J Okerson]

Lou goes every year and he's the fucking. I believe he's the grand marshal this year.

[Robert Kelly]

I've been to a bunch, and they're all horrific.

[Big J Okerson]

No, get away from me.

[Robert Kelly]

But why do you go if you think they're horrific?

[Big J Okerson]

I was forced to go sexist sex dude.

[Robert Kelly]

With who?

[Big J Okerson]

My ex.

[Robert Kelly]

And I was also forced to go to Fire Island a few times. So that do your gay days are over now. Yeah. Wow.

[Big J Okerson]

You got enough, though, when you were on the inside, right? It was like prison. You had to get butt fucked a little bit.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah. Is that where you got that bracelet? Did the Gay Pride people give you that bracelet? No, this is from my little nephew. I'm talking about the other one.

[Big J Okerson]

That's also. Tell your little nephew. Tell your little nephew to make bigger bracelets. They're too tight. Hey, tell your little nephew he's a stupid idiot who didn't make a bracelet. Right.

[Robert Kelly]

We went fast, though. We went from, you know, seeing a Ellen kiss on TV with the world erupted. Sure to nobody gives. I mean, there's gays in every single show. There's gays in everything now.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, but it's almost what I'm saying, like the, like. Because gay Pride, it's celebrating literally the sex part of it.

[Robert Kelly]

The fucking part.

[Big J Okerson]

Well, that's what. That's what makes somebody gay is their attraction and sexual attraction to same sex. So you're celebrating that. It's a weird thing. It would be like celebrating gay or straight sex.

[Danny]

Well, yeah, I think it's more about celebrating the rights. It's like, it started as a riot, and that's where it all stemmed out of.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, now we're taking pride in riots. Christine, I knew you were A fucking homo.

[Danny]

I am a homo as a riot. Stonewall in. That's the whole thing.

[Robert Kelly]

What?

[Big J Okerson]

The ride at Stonewall Inn.

[Danny]

Harass the guys. Like the cops would go in and harass the gay guys for being gay. And one day they fought back.

[Big J Okerson]

All right, gay. Stop being so gay in this gay place.

[Robert Kelly]

Take that cop uniform off.

[Big J Okerson]

They have nothing hotter than a cop coming in to break up your gay club. He hates us. That's so horny.

[Robert Kelly]

Goddamn gays kept me wearing cop uniforms.

[Big J Okerson]

All right, guys, seriously though, break it up. Okay? All right. This is my jam. But seriously, you guys gotta hold up. Stop taking my Jay. Stop taking my belt off.

[Robert Kelly]

Stop. You're doing it again.

[Big J Okerson]

Lost in it. Oh, guys, I'm here. I'm here.

[Robert Kelly]

Someone's gonna go, I'm here.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm queer.

[Robert Kelly]

We need somebody going to get Jay again.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm Officer Queen.

[Robert Kelly]

Somebody to go get Jay. Jay's dancing officer.

[Big J Okerson]

Officer Gabo in the house. Who wants to spin my gun?

[Robert Kelly]

Can I just say something?

[Big J Okerson]

And then. And then homosexuality was born. That was the story of the Stonewall Inn. That's my one man show called Stonewall in riot today. It's a laugh riot.

[Robert Kelly]

So they did. They did the Stonewall.

[Big J Okerson]

There's a preview audience. So we're in preview still.

[Robert Kelly]

Did they do. So they did that and then they started the parade.

[Danny]

I don't know when exactly the parade started, but it was all stemmed out.

[Robert Kelly]

But now I think it's.

[Big J Okerson]

Once the gays found out that under the guise of parade you can outwardly on the streets on floats. I think that the next day I believe the parade started.

[Robert Kelly]

I've never been to the gay parade. They really on a float.

[Big J Okerson]

They said if you're on a float.

[Danny]

It did start the next year.

[Robert Kelly]

Are they real? I'm sorry, Are they really on. Are they really doing sexual acts out on a parade? I've never been.

[Danny]

No, they're not fucking on the floats. But it's really.

[Big J Okerson]

I bet it's happened.

[Danny]

I bet it has happened.

[Big J Okerson]

Absolutely. Bet someone is. Someone underneath the float who's driving a little car or something has been getting their dicks. Absolutely it is. Listen, you remember Wayne Rada? The thing that he always said. Still, that is one of my top five funniest things that made me laugh. I asked if him and his boyfriend were going to the Pride parade and he goes, no, me and Ray love each other. We don't have to walk around in buttless chaps to prove it. And that's sort of. And by the way, I'm making a joke, obviously, because there's a bunch of these things that are. Everyone's dressed appropriately. It's like gay firefighters and stuff. But right behind that is, like, Max's Bar and Grill. And it's just like Tranny's Helicopter in their dicks.

[Robert Kelly]

Do they really have their packers out?

[Big J Okerson]

No, they're in now. It's also become other guys. You can't see them because they're buried in butts. You see?

[Robert Kelly]

No way, dude.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah. Yeah, for sure. I bet you there is outdoor gay sex every Pride parade. Several times.

[Danny]

100%.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, several times.

[Danny]

Is there sex at the Puerto Rican Day Parade, too?

[Big J Okerson]

That's against their will. Those are rapes.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, those are called rapes.

[Big J Okerson]

Damn it, Christine.

[Danny]

Just good old fun gay sex, guys.

[Robert Kelly]

Do you remember?

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, yeah. No one's getting raped. No one's getting raped. A gay pride.

[Robert Kelly]

You know, New York was so simple when the Puerto Rican Day Parade, rapes were the only thing we really had to worry about. Like, once a year, you'd be like, I got to stay in today. And that was the only.

[Big J Okerson]

Now it's, you know, you got to worry about your Max going out to get a fucking soda on the corner. Ended up covered in rainbow lipstick on his wiener.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah. If you order a bagel, you get fucking lit on fire.

[Big J Okerson]

Now, I will say this. I would guess Lou. And the problem was you went. DJ Lou. You went with a girlfriend to this thing. You were dragged there. If you went.

[Robert Kelly]

Wait a minute. Dragged?

[Big J Okerson]

He got dragged there.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, I get it.

[Big J Okerson]

Cat eye makeup.

[Danny]

He was supposed to meet me and didn't come. And poor Tom had to drink all his beers by himself.

[Big J Okerson]

Well, yeah. Cool. It turns out Lou came early, so whenever you come, you realize, what am I doing to get the Pride Parade? Oh, that's right. I don't even like this. Let me get out of here. If you go as a straight guy and go alone and hang out on that route with real supportive gay pride shit.

[Robert Kelly]

On the gay route.

[Big J Okerson]

On the gay route, you could definitely pull pretty hot, because there's a lot of hot chicks that are straight or bisexual who go to this thing for the party of it. So if you go and just be like, God, this is so great. They're so great that gay people are finally getting the thing. You could probably get your dick sucked by some hot chicks and hook up. Would you say that, Louis? A lot of hot chicks there.

[Robert Kelly]

It's very sexually charged, but.

[Big J Okerson]

Right. I'm saying they're so horned up that if you pretend that you overly give a shit about gay rights.

[Robert Kelly]

It's easy.

[Big J Okerson]

You might get pussy there. Yes. Yeah.

[Robert Kelly]

If you can hang in there long enough. But it is too much.

[Big J Okerson]

I really. I do care about gay. I hope gays have all their rights, but not enough to go watch guys have sex on floats.

[Robert Kelly]

There's a lot of ugly women at this parade.

[Big J Okerson]

Absolutely.

[Robert Kelly]

I mean, there's a.

[Big J Okerson]

But I like to believe that all the fat ones are lesbians.

[Danny]

These corporations are all like, buying buses and stuff now. And it's just like the employees are walking with them. Like, I don't know if it's like they. All the gay employees from the company or it's the.

[Big J Okerson]

Let me tell you something. Those are all Starbucks employees we're watching in this parade right now. And it's the ugliest people I've ever seen. Where I always find there's always pretty cute chicks working in a Starbucks. So I will say this is their gay. These are their gays that work there. Starbucks gays.

[Robert Kelly]

That was. What's his name? What's her name's brother who on that float who's a chick who dated Pete Davidson.

[Danny]

Oh, Ariana Grande.

[Robert Kelly]

That's Ariana Grande's brother. The guy that was on the float before that.

[Big J Okerson]

That. Was that true?

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, I know that because he's. He was on Henry Danger and I was a big fan of Henry Danger.

[Danny]

He's a gay icon.

[Robert Kelly]

He is.

[Big J Okerson]

Okay.

[Robert Kelly]

He is gay.

[Big J Okerson]

What's his name?

[Danny]

Frank something Grande.

[Big J Okerson]

Is that Frank Grande?

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah. He is gay.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Robert Kelly]

Even real gay. He was the first gay Max went. That guy's gay.

[Big J Okerson]

Is that guy wearing a Legion of Skank shirt?

[Robert Kelly]

Don't you have a Gay Legion of Skanks hoodie?

[Big J Okerson]

Yes.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

A pride hoodie for sure. What is ever. Absolutely. We've made a game.

[Danny]

No, no, it's not a skank slide.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, no, I know.

[Danny]

Yeah. I think I kept the pride one.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, look at that. That guy's a sailor.

[Robert Kelly]

I don't know if he's a sailor.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, okay. All right. My bad. Sorry. We're just watching some pride parade over here. If you guys aren't following home watching Pride Parade. Look at all that pride.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, there he is right there.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, look, that guy's face is covered in pride. He's covered in that other guy's pride. And I think there was some pride left over from some guy last night. So funny. I watched the trailer for Gerard Carmichael's new special, and it is funny. Like, the. Like, the guys really had like a Two halves of a career. Like the half that's not gay. And now it's all about being gay.

[Robert Kelly]

Is that what it is now?

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah. The new trailer is talking about his boyfriend.

[Robert Kelly]

What's he wearing? Something fur.

[Big J Okerson]

Very stylish.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

Gay.

[Robert Kelly]

Must be freeing for a guy to come out and just be like, all right, now I get to wear what I want to wear.

[Big J Okerson]

Well, to come out and already be fucking famous is huge because now you're getting top, top tier dick. Although in that show, remember, he wanted to Tyler the creator, who was not interested.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah.

[Danny]

Well, it's also like, I mean, he's not that famous for a black sitcom star.

[Robert Kelly]

The creator, he's not that famous to turn a guy gay.

[Big J Okerson]

No. Tyler creator, I think does pretty gay.

[Robert Kelly]

Is he gay too?

[Big J Okerson]

I mean, he's definitely not straight. Right. Am I right about that?

[Robert Kelly]

Black us up, Lou.

[Big J Okerson]

He's never confirmed it, but he. I feel like he is gay. Maybe full on gay. Yeah.

[Robert Kelly]

Everybody in music now in hip hop and is gay.

[Big J Okerson]

Well, Wendy Williams, if you believe the queen, will tell you that they've all been gay since the very, very beginning.

[Robert Kelly]

I mean, it's coming. I mean, to fruition. Right.

[Big J Okerson]

But isn't it starting to seem like the great. And I'm not gonna say he's a sage wise savant, but I believe Corey Holcomb's saying, if you're involved in big time show business, you're gay. You've gotten in the ass.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

You've been inside of a man before.

[Robert Kelly]

I think that's true.

[Big J Okerson]

I don't know if it's true, but I think it may be. Listen, why would Wendy Williams say everybody has done gay now? Listen, it can't be true. I don't want to believe this. Method Man. I don't think so. But also, keep in mind, like almost a 2. Remember the Tupac ruse that everyone kind of figured out through time that he's gay? Well, it's like, you know. Well, no. By the time he was at his most popular, he'd gone to jail. Thug life. He had done the movie Juice and then started living his life like that, like Bishop, like the character. And started getting into a bunch of trouble and being. But you forget, this is like an art kid who was a dancer. He went to school for dance and poetry and shit. Yeah. That's always the thing. They always say, he's like. He seems so gay in this interview. I don't even know if I've ever felt that he was gay. They show this interview a lot.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

And everything seems gay. But he's so boyishly. He's like a pleasant kid.

[Robert Kelly]

He is gay in this video.

[Danny]

He's not a gangster.

[Robert Kelly]

Buddy, listen to his. If you listen to him talk, he is gay.

[Big J Okerson]

I like to do my super silly raps.

[Danny]

Well, isn't he at art school with.

[Big J Okerson]

What'S her face, Jada Pinkett? Yeah, that's right.

[Robert Kelly]

And she's gay.

[Big J Okerson]

And they both went bald.

[Robert Kelly]

And then Will's gay and everybody's gay. Everybody is gay.

[Big J Okerson]

It's possible.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah. That's why we've never made it. We never made it beyond.

[Big J Okerson]

Wendy Williams made it. Telling people who are gay. So why don't we start telling who is gay out there?

[Robert Kelly]

I think it'd be easy just to be gay.

[Big J Okerson]

I was with Shane this weekend. Gay.

[Robert Kelly]

Is he gay?

[Big J Okerson]

It's crazy how gay. Non stop gay.

[Robert Kelly]

Jesus.

[Big J Okerson]

I stay outside the whole time because I won't be a part of it.

[Robert Kelly]

Well, so it's only inside gay. It's not outside gay.

[Big J Okerson]

Inside in. There's these rooms afterwards where people come after the show and it just gets gay. So I go outside and smoke cigarettes.

[Robert Kelly]

Is there food? Is that where the food is?

[Big J Okerson]

There is food, but a lot of times I don't eat the food.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

Because I don't want to go in the room with all the gay. Yeah, that's what I tell myself because I'm so bad at meeting people. That's funny because, buddy, I whiffed pretty good this weekend.

[Robert Kelly]

Being gay.

[Big J Okerson]

No. Well, no. I try to not. I try to overly not to be gay in these situations. And then in a panic moment, I'm wildly gay and I blow it huge.

[Robert Kelly]

What do you mean?

[Big J Okerson]

So we did the show in Omaha. First night we were in Iowa. Next night, Des Moines, Iowa, home of Slipknot, by the way. Spit it out. We were in Iowa and we did the show and at the. They didn't see me at all. Well, first thing that happened was we got. It was like through Christine. The person who does hotels or something for Skank Festival was doing Comic Con out there. And he goes, the guy that plays Daredevil wants to come to the show.

[Robert Kelly]

The TV show?

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah. Okay, Daredevil.

[Robert Kelly]

Well, there's two Daredevils. There's the movie.

[Big J Okerson]

Do you think it was Ben Affleck? Yeah. You think I wouldn't have said Ben Affleck's coming?

[Robert Kelly]

I don't know. You might have been trying to be a little mysterious.

[Big J Okerson]

Okay.

[Robert Kelly]

You might have been like the guy who plays. And I'd be Like, oh.

[Big J Okerson]

And then I go and I think it's the guy from tv. In walks Ben Affleck.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah. You could have went that way.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm sorry.

[Robert Kelly]

It's okay.

[Big J Okerson]

No, I'm sorry.

[Robert Kelly]

No, it's okay.

[Big J Okerson]

Well, anyway, Charlie Cox. So he English correct. Didn't see that coming. But very. And also in talking to him for a good seven minutes, not sure if he's blind in real life or not still.

[Robert Kelly]

He is.

[Big J Okerson]

Is he? No, I don't know if he is.

[Robert Kelly]

How's he going to read the script?

[Big J Okerson]

I don't.

[Robert Kelly]

Braille.

[Big J Okerson]

Do you think no blind person's ever been in something before?

[Robert Kelly]

No, they don't. Dude, you don't know that. That's against SAG and after Rules.

[Big J Okerson]

By the way, you answered your question with a joke. That was the real answer. How's he read the script? Braille.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, I know.

[Big J Okerson]

Probably sometimes you throw these jokes out.

[Robert Kelly]

There and they don't land.

[Big J Okerson]

Jay, he might be blind.

[Robert Kelly]

What am I blind?

[Danny]

Not blind.

[Big J Okerson]

He's not blind. No, he's not.

[Robert Kelly]

He's not blind.

[Big J Okerson]

Well, every picture he sort of looks like he could be blind.

[Danny]

He's just used to looking blind.

[Big J Okerson]

Maybe, but he's very nice guy. But they will.

[Robert Kelly]

He fucking really does.

[Big J Okerson]

He looks blind and everything.

[Robert Kelly]

Wide eyed.

[Big J Okerson]

I told you. I just spoke this guy for seven straight minutes. Not sure if he wasn't blind. He left that night. Until this moment confirmed by the Internet is now I know he's not blind.

[Robert Kelly]

He's not blind.

[Big J Okerson]

Very nice guy.

[Robert Kelly]

Small, right? Petite.

[Big J Okerson]

No, not petite.

[Robert Kelly]

Not muscular though. Not like big superhero.

[Big J Okerson]

No, no, no. Yeah, but he was. So they came in the beginning of the show and went to go watch the show. I guess afterwards he stopped in and said hi. What was really funny about that was again, it's always perspective of what you know. I love the show Daredevil. I've watched all the seasons on Netflix and I watched the new one. I thought it was great.

[Robert Kelly]

It's great.

[Big J Okerson]

The new one particularly was great.

[Robert Kelly]

The new one was probably the best. Yeah, it was real violent.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah. D' Onofrio.

[Robert Kelly]

D' Onofrio and Punisher.

[Big J Okerson]

Punisher came back. It was really good.

[Robert Kelly]

Can't remember his name. What is his name?

[Big J Okerson]

Who?

[Robert Kelly]

Punisher.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, the guy. John Barenthal.

[Robert Kelly]

He's the fucking best.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, he's great. So first of all whiffed in that interaction because I did say new season was great, man. And then I said, what a comeback? What implying? Well, because it got canceled from Netflix and then picked up by Disney?

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

I said, I don't know. Isn't that a weird way to put it? What a comeback. It makes it seem like I'm acknowledging the show fell to pieces at one point. That was a weird way to say it.

[Robert Kelly]

How are you gonna say it?

[Big J Okerson]

I should have just said, great, new season, and stop there. Yep, I keep talking.

[Robert Kelly]

Yep.

[Big J Okerson]

So come back. So then I remember seeing Shane. I go, hey, they're gonna come back after the show. But I saw him out there. I go, the guy who plays Daredevil's here. I go, he's here with the guy who does the hotel reservations for Skank Fest. But he does Comic Con, I guess, too. And he brought Daredevil two or three times. I said that, you know, the guy who plays Daredevil is coming and changes eventually. He goes, I've never seen Daredevil, dude. I don't. It doesn't mean anything to me.

[Robert Kelly]

Wow.

[Big J Okerson]

It doesn't hold me with him. And then the rest of the night. The rest of the night, the whole joke kept becoming just me coming around the corner going like, daredevil's here. He's already sent. He's texted me three times pictures of Daredevil and says, daredevil's here.

[Robert Kelly]

That's so funny.

[Big J Okerson]

So then at the end of the show, towards the end of the show, I should say, I'm sitting outside smoking. Shane's got about 10 seconds.

[Robert Kelly]

The chick that's in True Blood is here. Dude, what the fuck? Huh?

[Big J Okerson]

I watched True Blood and we know you did. I did. Werewolves, vampires. Why would I not watch that? There's also shape shifters there, and everyone wants to have sex with that girl with a big gap tooth.

[Robert Kelly]

Don't forget about the fairies, you fairy.

[Big J Okerson]

There's also fairies. She was a fairy. Oh, that's why she was a fairy. Oh, God, what a show. So what? Why are they in that show? Now I got to care about Jacob versus Team Robert. Was it Team Jacob and Team Twilight? Yeah. What is it? What's the guy. What's the boy's name? Edward. Team Edward and Team Jacob.

[Robert Kelly]

He looked around the room. Even Christine didn't know what you're talking about.

[Big J Okerson]

I saw three of them in the theater.

[Robert Kelly]

Oh, my God.

[Big J Okerson]

I had a child and she saw one of them with me. Okay. What?

[Danny]

Jay loves vampires.

[Big J Okerson]

J love vampires. I want to be a vampire boy.

[Robert Kelly]

Imagine you dress like Blade, one of Blade's henchmen.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm just going to get killed by a blade in a party scene.

[Robert Kelly]

You're the guy that gets killed in the middle of the movie.

[Big J Okerson]

So I was outside smoking. 10 minutes left of the show. And who shows up? Not from the show. They haven't been there for the whole show. It is, and you'll get this right when I say the names. Black Lou, but Sidney Brown, Cooper DeJean, the two cornerbacks for the Philadelphia Eagles.

[Robert Kelly]

Okay.

[Big J Okerson]

Cooper De Jean is the one. Remember, he turned 22 at the Super Bowl. And he got the pick six, the interception for a touchdown.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

Crazy. He walks in. I see them both walk in. I acknowledge them both, but I give just, like a head nod. What, to them both when they go in? Well, they go into the arena.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

I was sitting on a, like, you know, a bench. So I was like. I was like, oh, hey, guys.

[Robert Kelly]

You've already went up.

[Big J Okerson]

Yep.

[Robert Kelly]

Oh, okay. So you have no.

[Big J Okerson]

Nothing.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, you have nothing. You have no juice.

[Big J Okerson]

No juice.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah. You're just a guy.

[Big J Okerson]

So I go in for the. Shane's last few minutes, and I'm watching those guys, like, wait there for him to get off stage in the same area I'm at. And they. And so Shane gets off stage. He comes in, he's talking to them. We all go back in the green room, the big green room. And I'm talk. He introduces me to them. You know, I shake hands with him, the two of them. And then, you know, we made some joke about Daredevil being here, too. And then he goes. He goes, I haven't watched the new season. Sidney Brown said that. So I was like, oh, it's good. He was like, oh, yeah. He goes. I remember. He goes, didn't I meet you in Philly? He did see me at the Philly show. And I was like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Cooper De Jean is just sitting there. And I go, all right. And then, I don't know, a gate opens somewhere and like, 40 more people come in the green room. And there was a celebrity softball game in town, is why these guys are all here. So a bunch of players from the Broncos and stuff come in. Livingston. I want to say a player. He's a player on the Broncos. Comes over. Couldn't be friendlier. So he's a big fan of me. Shaking hands with me. He's so nice. And then he. Then he goes. And fucking. They start all kind of having a conversation.

[Robert Kelly]

He was a big fan of Daredevil, too.

[Big J Okerson]

No, he did not say that. I dip out of the room and I leave. And I go outside, just start smoking my cigarettes again. I talk on the phone with Fenoia for a while. Christine a little bit, just killing time. And I'm waiting for a long time. We're flying back that night still, but we're not leaving there till like 11:30, shows over about 10:15. So I'm outside for a good hour just smoking cigarettes. And then I'm like, oh, I see a few people start trickling out outside. So I'm like, oh, I guess it's winding down in there a little bit. And there's my moment. Cooper De Jean, Sidney Brown walk out to go to their car. Now they've been introduced to me and Sidney Brown sort of remembers me. This is the interaction. Sidney Brown starts walking out and I go, I go, hey man, have a great year. And he goes, huh? And I went, you guys have a great year. I go, I'm not gonna. Then Cooper De Jean's looking at me, but they're walking away while it's. And this is how the sentence trailed to them. I go, I'm not gonna come this year. Cause I came last year. The only game I went to last year super bowl was the Atlanta Monday night. When they, when you go, okay, they were gone. I panicked, dude. I tried to get it all out at once. Out of the Eagles fly. I'm teary eyed, almost as hell, embarrassed. I'm so bad at it, dude. I'm so bad at it. I don't know what to do.

[Robert Kelly]

I had to take my headphones off because I couldn't listen to the rest of it. Jay, how are you so cool in here at Skank Fest on stage? I saw the picture of you. You sit down in front of thousands of people and you turn into a fucking cheddar in front of what's the shredule?

[Danny]

I love it.

[Robert Kelly]

In front of fucking sports guys, dude, you just performed solo sitting down in front of arena full of people. You're the star.

[Big J Okerson]

I almost told him I was gonna because like everyone's saying, they're like, dude, just go talk to him. I go, what am I gonna say? Hey, 22 year old boy, I'm gonna go down on opening day and get cheesesteaks and your jersey and then I'm gonna wear it like I'm your girlfriend.

[Robert Kelly]

Well, you could not.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm wearing your name on my back. You could not say that, right, but I'm going to.

[Robert Kelly]

But you could also walk up and go, hey, what's up man? I'm, I'm Big J Okerson. I did the show tonight. I'm. I'm on the blah, blah, blah. Oh yeah, cool, man. What's up? Hey, man. Nothing.

[Big J Okerson]

Big Eagles fan, dude.

[Robert Kelly]

Big Eagles fan. What's up, dude? How you doing, man? How's it going? You see the chain yet?

[Big J Okerson]

Just inform them that I was not going to come to a game this year because I am the mush for the it was. And they didn't stop to finish hearing me. They eventually, while I was talking, both turned their heads to continue walking away, and they knew I was in the middle of talking. They were just like, oh. They were all like, all right. What?

[Robert Kelly]

Because.

[Big J Okerson]

And I bet when they turned around, they looked at each other and did like a Jeez. Yeah, it sucked because you turned into.

[Robert Kelly]

An F A N.

[Big J Okerson]

An F, a N, N I T. A real fan.

[Danny]

Yeah, just football, though. He told me he had a J.

[Big J Okerson]

Lo.

[Robert Kelly]

A real orange peel fan.

[Big J Okerson]

We got to take a break. I just want to make sure. Yeah.

[Robert Kelly]

Wow.

[Big J Okerson]

Hang on. Black was giving us Jacobs double cum shot. Double load to the face. That must mean it's time for commercial. Bobby Kelly's going to be at that dojo of comedy in Mars Plains, New Jersey, June 6 and 7. That's this fucking weekend, everybody. After that, he's going to be in Portland, Maine, Rochester, New York, all on deck for tickets. And all tour dates go to Punch up Live.

[Robert Kelly]

Robert Kelly and Big J is going to be this weekend governors in Levittown, New York, Friday and Saturday night. After that, he's going to be in San Diego, taking it in an alley up the button by the prisoners. If you're a prisoner, go down, get down now. If you're any prisoner.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, any prisoner, just get out of prison. I need you to be there.

[Robert Kelly]

Jay's giving.

[Big J Okerson]

I need you to be there and hold my hand while I get tagged in the ass in an alley.

[Robert Kelly]

All you got to do is bring a pack of cigarettes and some weed. You get free JS Charlotte, Tacoma for tickets and all the tour dates.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm not confrontational. I might say no. I might not say no.

[Robert Kelly]

Go to Big J. You are not.

[Big J Okerson]

If you go, dude, I brought you cigarettes. I'll go.

[Robert Kelly]

All right.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, it is true. All right. Just a little bit. For a little bit.

[Robert Kelly]

Bigjcomedy. Com. Make sure you check out our podcast and go to our YouTube page and check that out. We'll be right back. It's a boss.