The Bonfire w/ Big Jay Oakerson & Robert Kelly

Episode: "Disappointing Hungerthon"

Date: December 12, 2025
Hosts: Big Jay Oakerson & Robert Kelly
Guest(s): Jacob and studio crew

Overview

This episode of The Bonfire delivers the show's signature blend of raw, irreverent humor, behind-the-scenes showbiz banter, and comedic rants. The main theme is a playful gripe: the hosts are losing a SiriusXM Hungerthon charity bidding competition to colleagues Sam Roberts and Bennington, sparking rants both about the contest and about their own half-hearted promotion efforts. Along the way, Jay and Bobby riff on failed musical ambitions, foot maladies (gout and plantar fasciitis), rock drummers, aging rock stars, the podcast industry’s awards, and more.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Musical Chords & Wannabe Musicians

[02:03 - 11:00]

• Jay and Bobby joke about song similarities: Jay notes Nirvana’s "Smells Like Teen Spirit" sharing chords with Boston’s "More Than a Feeling."
• Robert Kelly: "There was a guy... he had this piano lesson where you learn how to play any song with like fucking three things." (02:39)
• Both hosts describe the hype (and eventual neglect) of buying instruments to learn music—guitar, harmonica, drums—never following through.
• Extended riff on comedians (Bill Burr, Sam Tallent) who excel or dabble at drums; playful jealousy and admiration for “drum face” and stage energy.
  • Big Jay on Bill Burr: “He wants to, like, do it. Like, the actual. And I’m like, dude, what do you waste your time for, man?... I’ll play along with it.” (04:17)
  • Mention of Skankfest highlights with impromptu jam sessions—“Sam Talon’s so goofy, like in appearance... He was killing. It kills. So good.” (03:47)

2. Comedy Life & Aging

[09:29 - 11:00]

• Bobby references the contrast between his wild youth and low-key adult life: “You guys should have met me when I was 13. Oh, 13 year old Bobby Kelly and a 30 year old Mitch Hedberg would have fucking parties.” (09:41)

3. Rock Star Nostalgia: Drumming, Aging, and Icon Status

[13:10 - 20:45]

• Reverent and tongue-in-cheek analysis of drummers who have “the face,” over-the-top physicality, and pure vibe vs. technical prowess (drummers from Stones, Beatles, Tommy Lee, Dave Grohl, Van Halen, etc.).
• They discuss Guns N’ Roses’ live quality and Axl Rose’s visible aging:
  • Jay: “I mean, the way they have him all like loaded up with like effects on the show, he sounds fine live...” (16:51)
  • Bobby on Axl: “I just hate that he wears True Religion jeans still... And his lack of dancing. Now his big move is to walk backwards.” (17:52, 18:05)
• Billy Joel praised for playing the piano and keeping it simple; both hosts recall moments from his concerts.
  • Robert Kelly: “Billy Joel’s the guy, you’re like, I don’t want to fucking go. And then you go. You’re like, I’m so glad I went.” (19:52)

4. The Hungerthon Contest & Comedic Grudges

[42:47 - 44:41]

• The hosts' main gripe is losing bids to Sam Roberts and Bennington for the SiriusXM Hungerthon, sparking classic show rivalry and mock outrage:
  • Jay: “Sam Roberts and Bennington are beating us with bids right now. And I gotta tell you, it's driving me nuts.” (43:29)
  • Bobby: “They need to get off the couch... Stop getting on the fucking social media. And now we need you.” (44:42)
• Accusations/jokes about their rivals faking bids (“flim flam”), discussion about the mechanics of bidding, and humorous solutions (e.g., a mega-bid pooled from fans).

5. Gout, Foot Pain, and Old-Guy Complaints

[24:18 - 34:34]

• Jay shares his saga of suffering from, and recovering from, gout during Guns N’ Roses at MetLife Stadium, including applying odd remedies (cherry juice) and advice from a fellow sufferer, Kimowitz.
  • Jay: “By the time Guns N Roses comes on, whole concert, the place stands up. I stood up for a second and then I sat back down, and the whole concert was me just looking at asses of people sitting in front. Couldn't stand up.” (28:20)
• Dive into home remedies, weird foot treatments, and Rolfing.
  • Robert Kelly: “I was in Aruba trying to do a ball on my plantar fasciitis... I heard a pop and my toe down the middle... Since then... I have like this numb feeling in my toe.” (31:54)

6. Rants about Podcasting & Awards “Unfairness”

[38:05 - 42:33]

• Jay and Bobby mock the proliferation of celebrity podcasts and their dominance of awards like the (fictional or new) Podcast Golden Globes.
  • Jay: “I keep watching clips of [Amy Poehler's] podcast... and you’re like, what a boring hunk of shit.” (38:20)
  • Bobby: “We do podcasts because we had nothing else to do... It was a shit job.” (40:48, 40:56)
  • Suggest separate categories for podcasts: comedy, true crime, etc.

7. Bag Obsession & Luxury Travel Riff

[22:08 - 23:41]

• Good-natured roasting of Christine’s obsession with Louis Vuitton, “bag sluts” culture, and Bobby’s adventures being a “fat with a white umbrella” outside the Paris flagship.

8. Closing Banter: Tour Dates, Show Promotion, and Life Choices

[50:35 - 52:58]

• Standard comedy plug roll, riffing over how the promotion and bid drive for Hungerthon could be improved.
• They debate whether Jay should make the haul to catch the Sixers/Lakers game in Philly or just relax at home (definitive answer: Stay home).

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Big Jay: “You want someone [on drums]... there’s no reason he has to go up that high to hit the fucking snare. No, but he does, dude.” (12:51)
• Robert Kelly: “I went to his [Bill Burr’s] house in LA, and he has a drum room... he goes, ‘Dude, you gotta get a drum room and you gotta get an antique car, dude.’ I’m like, $70,000...” (04:54)
• Jay on Axl Rose: “He butt flaps... Dane Cook butt flap jeans.” (17:57)
• Robert Kelly: “You're gonna feed people the amount of bids we get. It's the highest bid. We need $30 million in a bid.” (45:05)
• Jay, about rival shows: “Opie, if you donate $20,000, they will let you back in the building to sit in the Bonfire. We should get Anthony Kumia: donate $50,000 and see if they don’t let you in for hunger, dude.” (45:47)

Important Segment Timestamps

• [02:03] – Song structure riff, Nirvana vs. Boston
• [03:46] – Skankfest memory, drum face discussion
• [13:10] – “Wrong gig drummer,” classic viral video
• [19:43] – Billy Joel concert, host’s appreciation
• [24:24] – Jay’s gout story at Guns N' Roses
• [31:13] – Rolfing and plantar fasciitis, massage hijinks
• [38:18] – Celebrity podcasts & awards rag
• [43:29] – Hungerthon disappointment, competitive fire
• [52:41] – Stay home or go to Sixers/Lakers debate

Tone & Style

The hosts maintain their trademark:

• Unfiltered, sarcastic New York banter
• Plenty of self-deprecation (musical failures, aging complaints)
• Razor-sharp, often absurd pop culture analysis
• Friendly jabs at fellow comedians and the SiriusXM ecosystem
• Occasional moments of touching honesty about life changes (musical aspirations, health concerns)

For New Listeners

You don’t need context about the SiriusXM “Hungerthon” or the comedy circuit to enjoy the episode—just a taste for quick-witted, off-the-cuff conversation. The show is as much about the entertainers riffing on their own foibles as it is about the topics at hand. If you get the jokes, you’re part of the Bonfire tribe.