
Yungblud is playing Radio City Music Hall tonight and the Bonfire Boys will be there! As Jay and Bobby are waiting for their tickets to arrive they speculate about every aspect of their date. They research what songs they will hear and which Yungblud merch they will purchase. Bobby was shamed out of his original flashy outfit by his son for a more conservative look. He fantasizes that he will find himself backstage alone with the young heartthrob. | Madonna performed in Times Square NYC and she didn't look much like her younger self. | Mike Finoia was on Comics Unleashed and Jay plays a few short clips of his debut. *To hear the full show to go www.siriusxm.com/bonfire to learn more! FOLLOW THE CREW ON SOCIAL MEDIA: @thebonfiresxm @louisjohnson @christinemevans @bigjayoakerson @robertkellylive @louwitzkee @jjbwolf
Loading summary
Announcer
Great news for comedy TV fans. Every episode of the Hulu original series Alice and Steve is streaming on Hulu. From the producers of baby reindeer best friends Alice and Steve see their world implode when Steve starts dating Alice's 26 year old daughter. When the once rock solid friendship turns sour, these best friends make the best enemies. Watch every episode of Alice and Steve on Hulu and Hulu on Disney for bundle subscribers terms apply. When you're a maintenance engineer in a beverage manufacturing plant, you keep production lines moving and quality on track because there is no room for slowdowns. With Grainger's vast selection of high quality motors, sensors, belts and hard to find parts, you can get what you need fast and all in one place. So nothing gets in the way of getting the job done. Call 1-800-GRAINGER clickranger.com or just stop by Grainger for the ones who get it done.
Jay Oakerson
And now, the bonfire with Big J.
Christine
Okerson and Robert Kelly.
Laura
Wash your puss in the sink.
Female Caller
Ah.
Christine
When I fell in love with him, Jay, when I knew he had what they call in the business, it.
Jay Oakerson
And tonight you're gonna show him how much.
Christine
I'm gonna show him it.
Jay Oakerson
Has anyone talked to Liam? Do we have tickets?
Christine
I thought he sent them to Christine.
Laura
That would be supposed to be sent to me. I don't have them yet.
Christine
That'd be hilarious.
Jay Oakerson
If we don't get tickets, we're going to the Cellar.
Christine
Okay. It's not. Seller wings aren't the same as Young Blood.
Jay Oakerson
They're not.
Christine
I got all dolled up, got new sneakers that I saved. Oh, I broke them out.
Jay Oakerson
Oh, yeah, dude, you're gonna see those, buddy.
Christine
You don't understand. I was. I was all. I had my outfit ready to go.
Jay Oakerson
All right, we need these tickets. Then someone reach out to Liam.
Christine
I had. I had my outfit ready to go. Dawn left. I was getting my stuff together. I put on my whole gear. I got a jacket. I had another shirt.
Jay Oakerson
It's so humid out.
Christine
I know, but I. I told you I got a pop.
Jay Oakerson
Yeah, your pop's going to be armpit stains.
Christine
I. I don't sweat like that.
Jay Oakerson
Okay.
Christine
I got a pop all ready to pop. Had my whole outfit on. I was peacocking, and Max came home and he walked up and he looked at me, goes, what are you doing? I go, what? I gotta go. I'm gonna work. Are you wearing that? I go, why? Yeah, I'm wearing that. He goes, dude, it's gay. I went, what? He goes, dude, you can't wear that you can't wear. I had a red jacket.
Jay Oakerson
Did you tell him that was the message you were trying to send?
Christine
And he grabs. He's like, dude. He's literally mad at me. But, dad, you can't wear that out. You can't. He goes, where are you going?
Jay Oakerson
I take his word.
Christine
13 years old, I'm going to the concert. And then I have my pink thermos of my iced coffee in it that I bring to work in my car. And.
Jay Oakerson
What?
Christine
It's a little pink thermos.
Jay Oakerson
Why is it pink?
Christine
I don't know. It was the only one they had. But I like the functionality of it.
Jay Oakerson
Is the only one they had when
Christine
I was buying it. Yes. It was the only one they had with that functionality. TJ Maxx. Max for the minimum. I like the. I need good functionality.
Jay Oakerson
Taking the functionality.
Christine
Well, I don't know if you understand what I'm saying.
Jay Oakerson
You picked a pink thermos.
Christine
I don't know if you understand what I mean when I say functionality.
Jay Oakerson
Does it only have room for three fingers and a thumb?
Christine
No. I need it to be big enough to hold enough coffee, but thin down the bottom so it fits in my.
Jay Oakerson
So it doesn't hurt.
Female Voice (Ad)
No.
Jay Oakerson
When it's all the way in.
Christine
So it fits in my cup holder in my car.
Jay Oakerson
Is that what you call it?
Christine
But.
Jay Oakerson
And then shove your Stanley in my cup holder.
Christine
And then the. And then the top. I wanted to. I wanted. I want a straw. Flip up. I don't want the slide open. Coffee.
Jay Oakerson
Understood.
Christine
I want this so I can. You know.
Jay Oakerson
Christine's got that in black.
Christine
Yeah, well, they didn't. The only one I had when I needed one was this.
Laura
Well, when you impulse bought it and when you were being a Max and Issa.
Christine
You're goddamn right.
Jay Oakerson
You could have just waited and ordered the one that's not a girl's color.
Christine
I don't know if you know what impulse buying is, Jay, but.
Jay Oakerson
Right, but then you can hang on that one until the black one comes and then swap them out.
Christine
No, I bought this one, and I.
Jay Oakerson
To send a message, literally.
Christine
I had my iced coffee on the counter. He goes, hey, why don't you take this, too, with your outfit? I go, I am. That's my. Nice.
Laura
She got a boy mom sticker.
Jay Oakerson
Is he gonna be like, oh, my God, you forgot your purse, dad.
Christine
He goes, you can't wear that. He goes. He goes. I go, I'm leaving. He goes, hey, all right. Go, Queen. He called me queen.
Jay Oakerson
Nice.
Christine
I go out. I'm not Wearing. I took my red jacket off Slay girl and I put on a different shirt. And then you changed shirts, too, I tell you. Yeah, the shirt was a little crazy.
Guest or Additional Male
Why?
Jay Oakerson
What was the shirt?
Christine
I don't know.
Jay Oakerson
Youngblood.
Christine
No, no. I was trying to get one. I can't. I'm getting one tonight, though. What up?
Jay Oakerson
You're gonna buy merch?
Christine
I had my. My Youngblood merch. Yeah. Why? You know I'm a merch. Fucking whore.
Jay Oakerson
He's a boy, buddy.
Christine
He's a man. He was next to you. Right next to you. He's a fucking rock star. He's going to be the next big thing in rock and roll.
Guest or Additional Male
Okay?
Jay Oakerson
Yeah, but you're going to wear a shirt with him on it.
Christine
He's Mick Jagger. He's Steve Tyler. He's fucking Freddie Mercury all rolled up.
Jay Oakerson
Every wanted to.
Christine
I didn't say Bon Jovi. Bon Jovi was not in there.
Jay Oakerson
Bon Jovi was not everybody. He's got a little Bon Jovi thing
Christine
to him a little bit.
Jay Oakerson
Yeah.
Christine
And I was. I. So I changed everything. And then Max was like, all right, you better. Then he popped my chain.
Jay Oakerson
Him and Bon Jovi have a similar face shape that you'll see as you look up with his in your mouth. You'll see that. That right. Right here. Similar right here.
Christine
First of all, I'm not gonna. I'm not going there because I. I mean, I. I think he's sexy.
Jay Oakerson
You're hoping.
Female Caller
I.
Christine
If he's like, hey, come back to the dressing room. And then somebody stops you and then just lets me go. I won't let that happen.
Jay Oakerson
What if we're going back to the
Christine
dressing room, he's like, young blood wants to see you. And then we both go back and he's like, not you. And he just wants me in the dressing room. I'm not gonna let that happen.
Jay Oakerson
It's not gonna happen. Did you have. You fantasized that?
Christine
But I have to fantasize.
Jay Oakerson
What's the situation where they go you not. What is it? Studio 54? Do you think you're a young gorgeous man?
Christine
I just know. But listen. But when I went room, I was like, hey, man, I can't do this. And I left and I went back to.
Jay Oakerson
In your fantasy, you got in the room.
Christine
It's not a fantasy, it's a thought.
Jay Oakerson
You went just to say you went in and popped in just to let him know you came. You're there.
Christine
I was like, hey, what's up, bro? And he was like. And he was Kind of like just had his pants on.
Jay Oakerson
Yeah. And you're trying to take yours off. Security tackles you.
Christine
You think, I'm gonna take my pants off in front of Youngblood? He's gonna see balls over my dick and then another set of balls.
Jay Oakerson
I mean, he's frozen in smiles, so you're gonna think it's all the signals. I guess he's like. I guess he likes me pulling my pants down.
Christine
Cheeky little cunt.
Female Caller
Come on.
Christine
You don't love it, you cheeky little
Jay Oakerson
friend. Laura in here. Our friend Laura. You're going to a concert tonight, right?
Christine
Are you going to Youngblood?
Guest or Additional Male
Possibly.
Laura
I'm also waiting on my friend.
Christine
Are you excited to go?
Laura
Yeah.
Christine
I mean, this is what I like about her. First of all, who she is. Like. Like, when she walked in, I was like, hey, what's going on? I thought she hated me, but then she said hi the same way to everybody else. And then when you said you to the concert, possibly, I was like, this is the perfect per person to work with Lewis, by the way.
Laura
Whisperer.
Christine
Yeah.
Shannon Maldonado
I mean, it's.
Jay Oakerson
She's like a rescue dog. She's skittish. She's skittish. You have to say it's like, no, no, she likes you. She's just weird. She's just a little bit of a weirdo. And it's also. It's raining outside, so she has to just lay in the corner.
Christine
We should take her to the Cure.
Jay Oakerson
That'd be the cure for something. Just drab. God, that Cure concert sucked shit so hard. As a woman, if you're a single lady. If Youngblood called you out to come backstage just to service him, would you? Of course you would. Yeah. Christine would, too.
Christine
Yeah, of course they would, Jay. We all would.
Jay Oakerson
I'm not gonna go service Youngblood. You heard it here first.
Guest or Additional Male
No. Bobby has the strength to not do it.
Laura
You can watch me do it.
Guest or Additional Male
The inner strength.
Christine
I've actually. I am exactly. I've meditated. I will. I have the strength to not, first of all, not leave a friend. Never leave you.
Jay Oakerson
You can leave me.
Christine
No, I would never do that.
Jay Oakerson
If you're gonna have your almost famous moment with Youngblood.
Christine
No, I would never do that.
Jay Oakerson
I would never do that. What if he takes his shirt off for you? You get to see for yourself.
Christine
First of all, he doesn't have a shirt on. When I go in the back room, it's already off.
Jay Oakerson
I didn't know that.
Christine
Yeah, dude.
Jay Oakerson
Sorry. I haven't seen what you've seen.
Christine
He just Did a hot contest by the. If he doesn't take his shirt off while we're there, it's gonna suck.
Guest or Additional Male
Oh, you're gonna smell that concert musk on him and you're not gonna be able to hold off.
Jay Oakerson
I'm gonna be bummed out if he stays shirted the entire show, aren't you?
Guest or Additional Male
A little bit.
Christine
A little bit maybe.
Laura
Yeah.
Christine
Yeah.
Jay Oakerson
But I feel like it's in a different way than you, but yeah, sort of.
Christine
Yeah, man, come on, take that off. Maybe.
Jay Oakerson
Kinda.
Christine
What if everybody in the concert takes their shirt? He's like, everybody take your shirts off right now. And me and you just leave.
Jay Oakerson
I'll leave. If we're the only two people and we're like that much of a sore thumb, I'm leaving. I'm leav lean before I do it. I don't care if the guy next to me is morbidly obese. I'm still not doing it.
Christine
There's going to be no guys at this concert. They're going to be gay guys. Me and you are going to be the only straight people at this concert, guys. You are going to be the only.
Female Caller
Thank you.
Christine
Now, I mean, look it, I just. I. I love. I love lead singers. I love. I've always liked men. That was not. That's out of context and that's. That. That's. I mean, you could be sued for that.
Jay Oakerson
It's not that out of context, actually.
Guest or Additional Male
Seems to be.
Christine
All right, I like him. He's just a fan. All right, Relax.
Jay Oakerson
You love it?
Christine
I love it. Very excited.
Jay Oakerson
I know we're coming in tomorrow. We're doing a live show tomorrow. A rare live Thursday. Just come in and talk about it.
Christine
But we don't know if we have tickets.
Jay Oakerson
We don't know if we have tickets yet.
Christine
For sure.
Laura
I. He said you have the tickets. They're just not in my account. Yeah, I'm sure it's.
Jay Oakerson
That doesn't make any sense.
Christine
Can you.
Laura
You know how last minute the guest list shit is.
Jay Oakerson
Yeah, it's not guest list. What do you mean, guests? He says he's transferring your Ticketmaster account,
Laura
but it's like comped tickets through Ticketmaster.
Jay Oakerson
I don't think that's what's happening.
Laura
That's how. Yeah, that's how it works when it's Ticketmaster guests.
Jay Oakerson
Liam, what if Liam us this hard? What if we said not only could he do what we were promised, but then only got us two tickets? And then those two tickets where it didn't come through.
Christine
What if it's only one ticket.
Jay Oakerson
What do we do? I'm gonna tell you if that happens, Liam, and let this strike fear in your heart. I'm gonna tell people what I saw at that boathouse. I'm gonna tell people what I saw you do. You and your fucking frat friends. I know where she's at, and I'll take the cops right to her.
Christine
You know what he did four summers ago?
Jay Oakerson
I know you did four summers ago. Leave, you creepy piece of shit.
Christine
Look at him. Look at him. Oh, God.
Jay Oakerson
And I know where you keep your trophies. In your house.
Christine
Your trophies are your victims, your earrings and your of hair.
Jay Oakerson
There it is. Thank you, Lou. That's the right song for it. Not a lot of. Not enough people listen to the words of this song. It's all fucked up.
Christine
I didn't even know that you. You're the first person to teach me that.
Jay Oakerson
Really? Yeah.
Christine
Well, on the show, yeah.
Jay Oakerson
It's about a guy taking a girl behind a lake house and torturing and killing her. That's all the lyrics are about.
Laura
Right?
Jay Oakerson
Yeah.
Christine
How come this isn't like. Like a thing? Like, people like, oh, my God, we're singing about.
Jay Oakerson
They didn't. Because they also. They didn't make a video that really depicts this.
Christine
Well, how would you make the video? That would be terrible.
Jay Oakerson
It would be a great horror. Yeah.
Christine
Plus, it was the 90s. Nobody gave a.
Jay Oakerson
No one really cared. But it really is. It's a guy. He's like. That's his thing. He's, like, laughing while he's, like, saying crazy to her. It's a good song. Good song either way. That's right, Liam. Gonna tell your fucking toady story about what you've done at that fucking boathouse with you and your crew. Team friends. With you and your Duke lacrosse friends. You guys raped that girl.
Christine
He does dress like a former rowing team guy.
Jay Oakerson
Absolutely. Dude, this guy only knows Ivy League parties. He hits chicks. I'll tell you everything bad about him. Liam, I'm starting to leak secrets. Liam hits women. I'm gonna keep going until you get these tickets in Christine's account.
Laura
Well, I don't think they're good.
Jay Oakerson
Oh, look what showed up. Once I said I'd show you where the bodies were.
Laura
They actually came in at 12:39. It was just from a weird email.
Jay Oakerson
Liam, I'm sorry. I've. Maybe I may have. I may have opened up a. A web here for you. I may have up for you. All right. Hey, Authorities. There's not actually a body anywhere. I was Just wound up.
Christine
Yeah.
Jay Oakerson
You think they're going to believe that?
Christine
Thank God you didn't tell him what he thought about the Jews.
Jay Oakerson
I was there, Liam. Just know I didn't tell people what you thought about the Jews. And I really kept quiet about your feelings on the black employees here. I'm looking at you, Black Lou. He's got some thoughts.
Guest or Additional Male
This is bad, y'.
Female Caller
All.
Jay Oakerson
Where are our tickets at? Yeah, that's what I want to see. Where our tickets at?
Christine
Can I just say something?
Jay Oakerson
If it says mezzanine, dude, I'm gonna fucking throw a chair through the window of his office.
Christine
I'm not gonna. I do like a seat.
Jay Oakerson
They're only seats.
Christine
Okay, great. I'm at the age of I don't mind sitting at a concert.
Jay Oakerson
You know, for a guy who's got. For a guy who's got a closet full of hocus and on clouds, you sure do hate standing.
Christine
I didn't wear my hocus. I. That was a choice I made.
Jay Oakerson
I wear pure fashionable sneakers. Do you think these things are comfortable?
Christine
They're flat footed, buddy.
Jay Oakerson
I'll stand on them for six hours so people know how cool I am.
Christine
I wore my fashionable Nikes.
Jay Oakerson
That's why you can't stand.
Christine
Yeah, that's why I can't stand you Refreshable Nikes.
Jay Oakerson
And it's hurting your fascia.
Christine
I was sitting there for a half hour deciding whether on clouds, Hokas, or fashionable, and I went, you can't suck
Jay Oakerson
off this rock God wearing old man shoes.
Christine
I know I can't.
Jay Oakerson
Why don't you throw on some new balances and some tastefully above the thigh shorts.
Christine
Yeah, not even girls want to look down and see Hokas.
Jay Oakerson
Oh, Bobby, look who's wearing a wallet chained to nowhere.
Christine
Oh, he has a. He has a wallet on that.
Jay Oakerson
Nope.
Christine
How do you know? Look, you don't know what's in his back pocket.
Jay Oakerson
It's not in his back pocket. It's on the belt loop in the back.
Christine
Are you sure?
Jay Oakerson
I'm a hundred percent sure. No one wears a back pocket wallet anymore.
Laura
They all go to nowhere. I told you. They're like.
Jay Oakerson
They all go to nowhere now.
Christine
Oh, you invented something.
Jay Oakerson
I was ahead of my time.
Laura
Your seats are really great.
Christine
Where, where, where, where, where?
Laura
Right here.
Jay Oakerson
Is that written in Japanese?
Laura
No, it's just, where are we? So this is a stage and you're here.
Christine
Are we on the end?
Laura
And you're like, right.
Christine
Oh, we're in the middle. Oh, that sucks.
Guest or Additional Male
Bobby, he can point to you from there.
Jay Oakerson
Those seats suck.
Christine
I want to be on the end. What if one of us has to.
Laura
Ten rows back?
Jay Oakerson
Yep. I want to be right in front of him.
Laura
So go rush the stage.
Jay Oakerson
I'll distract them while you rush the stage, Bobby. Okay, but you gotta.
Laura
You can be like the guys that sting and just go in the aisles.
Jay Oakerson
Listen, you can't think, though.
Guest or Additional Male
Mm.
Jay Oakerson
You gotta act.
Christine
What do you mean?
Jay Oakerson
I mean, when I lay the distraction, you gotta get up there and get to him. And then I think when you get up on stage, he'll recognize you.
Christine
I don't think so, because he hasn't responded to my DM yesterday.
Jay Oakerson
Think back to the fantasy.
Christine
Hasn't even read it.
Jay Oakerson
Think back to the fantasy. Remember at the end of it, you were on stage with him singing your favorite song, but you were doing the Machine Gun Kelly Parks. That's the only song of his. You know that. He did it with Machine Gun Kelly and you just liked his hair and outfit.
Christine
That's not true.
Jay Oakerson
You fell in love with the boy's hair and outfit is what happened.
Christine
Buddy, I fell in love with everything.
Jay Oakerson
You fell in love with a sexy young boy who you wish you looked like.
Christine
I don't wish I look like him.
Jay Oakerson
Yes, you do.
Christine
I do not. I do not want to look like young blood.
Jay Oakerson
Bobby.
Christine
Buddy, you think I want perfect, juicy lips, a little button nose, beautiful eyes and a great body, but it's long. It's not in shape, but it's thin and in shapely.
Jay Oakerson
Sick hair. Sick dick hair?
Christine
Yeah. You think I want that? You think I want perfect hair that flows in front of my face and I can whip it back when I say something interesting?
Jay Oakerson
I'll tell you what, he might get me with the hair tonight, though, the floppy hair. I'm gonna be like, yeah, good hair. It's good floppy hair.
Christine
Yeah, he's got. Dude, he's just the perfect rock star. Hang on. Perfect rock star lead man. He's the. It's what we've been waiting for. Who else is that cool up in front? If he can just switch from pop.
Jay Oakerson
I gotta see what he's singing, because that's what it is. When I asked the Mike G Mike from Skank said it's kind of like. It's like party pop rock.
Christine
Yeah.
Jay Oakerson
But I feel like he's gonna be very blink182ish. I feel like.
Christine
I feel like he's going towards the. When he hooked up with Ozzy and Aerosmith, I feel like he was. He's going more towards rock and roll. Yeah, and he loves a cover. You're gonna get some covers? Yeah. That's good. There are going to be some songs and there will be some.
Jay Oakerson
Bring up a set list, please.
Christine
There's go some, you know, speeches about,
Jay Oakerson
you know, his bloody. Something.
Christine
No, about, you know, how we all going to get along. And gay people. She doesn't matter.
Jay Oakerson
And Donald Trump was pretty yesterday. The uk. The uk.
Christine
The uk.
Laura
This is what this is last night.
Jay Oakerson
Last night.
Christine
Perfect.
Jay Oakerson
Out in Boston. This we did for you. It opens with a rendition. Well. Nope, just the song. War Pigs playing. I like that.
Christine
That's great.
Jay Oakerson
Then hello, Heaven. Hello. That banger. The Funeral. No idea. Idols, Part one. You're pretty excited about that.
Christine
More excited about Part two, but go ahead.
Jay Oakerson
Lovesick Lullaby. No idea.
Christine
It's a good song.
Jay Oakerson
My Only angel, which is an Aerosmith and Young Blood song, but will be done by just Young Blood. Fleabag. No idea. Low Life? Couldn't guess. And then the other Aerosmith. Youngblood song, sans Aerosmith. Then he's gonna do the changes. He's gonna do the Black Sabbath cover, the only ballad they ever made, which is not a good song.
Christine
You don't like Changes?
Jay Oakerson
No.
Christine
Really?
Female Caller
No.
Christine
You don't like when he did it?
Jay Oakerson
When he did it?
Laura
Yeah.
Jay Oakerson
He did a good job of singing. He's very talented. I bet. That song sucks.
Laura
This is a really short show. That's like an hour long show.
Christine
Perfect.
Jay Oakerson
You know, prob.
Christine
No prob.
Laura
I mean, his songs aren't more than five minutes each. There's only 13 songs.
Christine
He could be like the Grateful Dead.
Jay Oakerson
Floyd over here. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Guest or Additional Male
That's not bad, factoring in gyration and
Jay Oakerson
then he's ending with ghosts.
Christine
And you're not factoring in speeches in between songs.
Guest or Additional Male
Yeah.
Jay Oakerson
He's going from ghosts into zombie. Do I know any of these songs that aren't covers?
Christine
No.
Jay Oakerson
Impossible.
Laura
I want to see if he changes.
Guest or Additional Male
Play.
Christine
Play the funeral one. That's a good one.
Jay Oakerson
Do you know it or are you just saying.
Christine
I don't. I don't. No, I don't. I. I know some of his songs. I don't know them. I can't sing them. I don't listen to them over and over. I mean, I don't do music like that, but I do like his last few videos he put out there.
Jay Oakerson
This is the funeral?
Guest or Additional Male
Yeah.
Christine
This is when he was young. It's kind of punky. White Wedding. It's kind of funky. Wait, wait, it gets good. What does this remind you of?
Guest or Additional Male
This White Wedding?
Christine
Yeah. Billy Idol reminds me of Billy Idol.
Jay Oakerson
Oh, I'll tell you what it reminds me of. Corey Feldman.
Christine
No, it doesn't. Don't say that. Then don't go if you're not gonna go. If you're gonna go with his attitude.
Guest or Additional Male
Dancing with myself.
Christine
I don't want to be next to somebody who's gonna hate on Young Blood.
Jay Oakerson
I'm not gon. You know, I think he's very talented. I think I'm excited for the cuttings. I think me and you're gonna have a good time.
Christine
We're. Have a great time. But if I look over and you are. Have those fucking eyebrows. If I see you roll your eyebrows at one song.
Jay Oakerson
I won't roll anything.
Christine
You're gonna have that dead stare.
Jay Oakerson
They might.
Announcer
Yeah, he's audibly.
Laura
He was. He was making Isabelle during the AIDS tribute at Madonna. He was making Isabelle laugh so much.
Christine
I was like, kristen, fucking knock it off. Yeah, I don't wanna. Do not make me. Do not fucking make me laugh. During the song.
Laura
The AIDS TR. Tribute you were making. You're cracking jokes at Isabelle and it's like this.
Female Voice (Ad)
That.
Jay Oakerson
You know what age tribute.
Laura
Remember when she was showing all the pictures and she was talking about losing all her friends? Madonna at Madonna.
Jay Oakerson
Oh, I didn't hear you say Madonna once.
Laura
And you were making Isabella laugh so much.
Jay Oakerson
Oh, yeah, yeah, for sure.
Laura
And Isabelle is just giggling.
Jay Oakerson
She is my kid.
Christine
He is going to. He's going to have some. He's.
Jay Oakerson
He talks an age tribute.
Christine
No, but he will. He will bring up subjects. I believe he makes speeches.
Jay Oakerson
I bet you're gonna yell something out and hope you recognize your voice, young blood.
Guest or Additional Male
I don't think he's gonna do political stuff. Huh? I don't think he will do police.
Jay Oakerson
I hope he gets heavy political.
Christine
He does.
Guest or Additional Male
He wants to be a rock star. Not.
Christine
Yeah, do that.
Laura
There's so many videos. I'm trying to find him. There's just series of videos of father figure playing with him gyrating. And there's just like tons of them.
Jay Oakerson
We'll play it.
Laura
I'm trying to find them. They're not loading on the page.
Jay Oakerson
Look at all those wallet chains to nowhere.
Christine
There's going to be a lot of chicks at this concert, man. A lot. We're going to stand out. Me more than you.
Jay Oakerson
No, because you'll be also mouthing the words and throwing your hands up in the air.
Christine
He goes to the crowd too, but we're going to be in the middle. He's not going to get to Us.
Jay Oakerson
Stand up on your chair.
Christine
Huh?
Jay Oakerson
Stand up on your chair.
Christine
Are you going to help me up on the chair, though?
Shannon Maldonado
Of course.
Christine
Thanks.
Jay Oakerson
And I'll help you back down. Thanks, but I'm not going to have to. Because in my mind, in my fantasy, you float over the audience to him. Yeah, yeah. He lifts you up. It's his love that lifts you up. Look at that dude. A lot of. To the microphone.
Guest or Additional Male
Yeah.
Christine
I'm sorry.
Jay Oakerson
Listen, I'm gonna run this traction, and you and Laura get back there and let him suck them.
Christine
I'm not letting her come back with that attitude.
Jay Oakerson
What's wrong with her attitude? She said she's totally in.
Christine
Hey, yeah. You guys want to suck my dick?
Female Voice (Ad)
Yeah.
Jay Oakerson
Look at yes is a yes on record.
Christine
Let him go first.
Jay Oakerson
Yeah, that's true. Let Bobby. You're want to let Bobby go first?
Christine
Laura, what if he. What if he wants both me and you back in the dressing room with just me and you? Would you go with me?
Laura
I don't think that's what would happen.
Jay Oakerson
That's not what he asked.
Christine
That's not the fantasy. You're not. We're not in reality. I mean, Jesus, what are you, my wife? I get it. I understand if he's. If someone comes up to us.
Jay Oakerson
Hang on, let me back up a little bit. Lara, first things first. There's not even a chance Bobby's going to float over the audience. I think she takes everything I'm saying very literally.
Christine
All right, I'll ask the question again now that you have the context we're looking for. If he. If someone comes up to us after, like, hey, you two. He won't chew in the back.
Jay Oakerson
You think all the workers are British also?
Christine
They are. Okay.
Laura
Yes.
Christine
In the fantasy, they are. I don't want some guy, hey, young blood, watch in the back.
Jay Oakerson
You want to be drowning in a sea of uncircumcised dicks, my man. And I appreciate that. Oh, would you be willing. How about if he just says to you, you are allowed. He's not gay, but he will allow you to pull his foreskin back and hold it back while Laura sucks his dick. Would you do that?
Christine
If we could influence it, yes. If we could videotape it, of course you could have it for the show.
Jay Oakerson
Yeah, absolutely. I mean, if you could tastefully blur out Laura. She is in a position of a. She is an executive for a company.
Christine
Of course we would blur you out, but your attitude would still be in the air.
Jay Oakerson
She's top brass over at Gas Digital Management.
Christine
We Get a phone call. Why did you let her do that? What are you guys doing?
Jay Oakerson
I just take pictures of my manager sucking Youngblood's cuck while you hold his foreskin back. She has to make important business calls for me.
Laura
Bobby,
Christine
fuck are you doing, man?
Jay Oakerson
Bobby, were you pushing Lara's head onto his while you kept fucking kissing his neck because he said he's not gay enough to kiss you? Because she can't stop talking about how great it was. It's bleeding into my business calls. I have a feeling that whoever's sitting next to you, Bobby, is gonna be uncomfortable with your behavior.
Christine
Well, I mean, I think it's gonna be an uncomfortable concert because it's gonna be a lot of young girls with their moms and me and you, which is gonna be an uncomfortable. And we're gonna have good seats. So all the fan fans are going to be right around us.
Laura
Just don't leer.
Jay Oakerson
Let's look at every time we meet an older woman, like a mom.
Christine
Yeah.
Jay Oakerson
We should have to get a count of what? Just go, would you? And appoint it Young blood. Would you?
Christine
All right.
Jay Oakerson
And then when they go, whatever they say, I'm gonna go, oh, he would. And then you go. You kind of like, wait, I just wave.
Christine
How about this? We have a. We have a parachute plan. At any point, one of us can go pull the parachute and we go.
Jay Oakerson
Leave.
Christine
Yeah. If it gets to the point where it's getting too weird, where we feel too uncomfortable,
Jay Oakerson
it's 14 three minute songs. We'll be fine.
Laura
Enjoying.
Christine
And don't forget the speeches.
Jay Oakerson
That's true. Also the anti Trump stuff.
Christine
It's actually a three hour show. It's only an hour of music.
Jay Oakerson
Yeah. He goes, I don't put times down for the speeches. The Queen is still alive. Prince Andrew didn't do it. Epstein island was fun.
Christine
He usually brings somebody.
Female Voice (Ad)
He.
Christine
Not usually, but he does bring people from the audience up to either play guitar or sing with him.
Jay Oakerson
Which do you want to do? If ask Liam to ask, the man can go up on stage and dance behind him.
Christine
I would dance. I would do dance if you came up with me.
Jay Oakerson
Why can't we introduce him? Why can't. What the happened to radio people introducing people?
Christine
What happened to radio?
Jay Oakerson
What the hell happened to radio?
Guest or Additional Male
He does that move where he puts the guitar around you and he holds your hand and strums with you.
Christine
Yeah.
Jay Oakerson
Oh my God, dude. Like how Teen Wolf taught the girl bowling. Like a real flirtatious hand on the hip thing.
Christine
Yeah. I would fucking 100% do that.
Guest or Additional Male
What a magical.
Christine
If you put my fingers on one chord and then I could just strum. I could do that. I could do the way Madonna plays guitar. I would definitely do that.
Jay Oakerson
Yeah. He's going to teach you how to play an F, and then you're going to play his fucking C. I see. Or D. I was going.
Christine
I heard you.
Jay Oakerson
Damn, dude, you can't wait to see this guy.
Laura
Do you want to see this video?
Christine
What is it?
Jay Oakerson
I don't know.
Laura
Yeah, it's just him dancing around. A father figure.
Jay Oakerson
Yes, I do want to see it so bad.
Christine
Yeah, he's very androgynous.
Jay Oakerson
He's not androgynous.
Christine
A little bit. A little bit. The way that. That's not.
Jay Oakerson
Oh, look at me taking a Billy Idol that one time.
Christine
Well, listen, his old. His old look, he used to go up in a skirt. He used to wear dresses on stage back in the day.
Jay Oakerson
Now he's leather pants.
Christine
Now he's rock and roll leather pants. He's kind of fine himself. This is. I. This is the version. I like the skirt.
Jay Oakerson
Is he finding himself, or am I Bobby Kelly finding himself?
Christine
I mean, you say tomato, I say tomatoes.
Laura
Were the Iggy Pop jeans the whole thing? The Chrome Hearts jeans?
Christine
What?
Laura
I think they're Iggy Pops jeans. Because he's dating the Chrome Hearts heiress.
Guest or Additional Male
Who.
Laura
It's a company that makes jewelry and, like, old, you know, like these leather pants, like, really cool stuff like that.
Christine
And I think that's what he told. The glasses I wanted you to get, I think were crown mark hearts.
Jay Oakerson
I almost got Chrome Hearts. There's a place up in Stanford that was, like, a resale joint. And I went to it, and the guy, I tried him on, I mean, it even had a wonky, like, arm. Like, one of the arms of it was, like, kind of loose, but they were very cool glasses. And I was like. I was like, maybe I'll get them, and I'll get them, like, tightened up or something. How much are these? He goes, I could do those for 1500. I went, all right, let me keep looking around.
Christine
Why is it that way?
Jay Oakerson
How much is this belt buckle? And then I ran.
Christine
Why is it doing that? I can't just say no either. Like, when I find out how.
Jay Oakerson
Like, why couldn't I say something like, well, that's absolutely ridiculous. They're not working right.
Christine
Yeah, why can't we say that? Like, I can't do. I just go, oh, let me. I'm just gonna go find my wife. I always say I'm gonna find my wife and talk to her about it. And she's not even with me, because I can't just say, that's ridiculous.
Jay Oakerson
Anything you have to do, if it comes down, it was like, hey, if you go down there, whatever. Like, you could ask people around. You could see who it is and ask them and get some tickets, like, some scalp tickets. And I'm like, I'll never ask. Yeah, I'll go up to people. I'll go, hey, do you. Do you know. Are you one of the guys? Damn, dude. All right, Christine.
Guest or Additional Male
Yeah, she's lost.
Jay Oakerson
Yeah, you're lost in this guy right in the screen.
Laura
First of all.
Jay Oakerson
Oh, Bobby, look at his above dick hair.
Christine
He's got a little bit.
Jay Oakerson
He's gonna be. He's gonna be hanging out a little bit.
Guest or Additional Male
It's a nice penis.
Christine
He's got what?
Guest or Additional Male
It's a nice penis.
Jay Oakerson
It is probably a really nice penis, but regular in your fantasy. It's regular size.
Christine
Well, it's weird because we met him on the show and we had, you know, typical radio host connection that you think is more than you. It is, because, like, oh, these guys are the best. Oh, they're fun. You guys are right. And I won't get you tea and. But yeah, Yorkshire tea.
Shannon Maldonado
I'll send you some.
Christine
You can get, like, 200 tea bags, right? And then you realize that. That promise, as soon as he left the building, as soon as he got in the elevator, he forgot about us. No, we don't exist.
Jay Oakerson
That's not true.
Christine
There's no way he's gonna go.
Jay Oakerson
You guys thought about me every second since.
Christine
Don't say that. That's not true.
Jay Oakerson
Remember you told him in the thing that I did the Kevin Hart roast. Remember your message? Oh, one of us had done the Kevin Hart roast since we saw you.
Christine
He hasn't sent anything back to me.
Jay Oakerson
Oh, he must not have saw the roast. You just wanted to be spoiled. I understand.
Christine
Oh, that would kill me. If he walked up. He's. Dude, you killed it on the roast bloke.
Jay Oakerson
I'd like to say, thank God. Kevin Hart roast. Genius comedian over here, the thing. And you just got to be next to me, mascara running down your face.
Christine
I would leave if he recognized you, and he did not recognize.
Jay Oakerson
I would wait outside for you while you went up there and sucked and them with Laura. And you get upset if he called me out at the show.
Christine
Yeah, I would.
Jay Oakerson
That's not good friendship. I would wait for you. I'd make sure I said I wouldn't
Christine
do it for you.
Jay Oakerson
You do it, though.
Christine
No, I wouldn't.
Jay Oakerson
I gave you that quick permission and you were like, thank God.
Christine
No, I did not. I would go in there and go, my friends out there. I can't. I.
Jay Oakerson
It was fake humility.
Christine
No, it was not.
Jay Oakerson
You came at me to do that because you know, I'm gonna go, Bobby, I'm not gonna spoil your possible moment to suck off young blood, buddy. Of all things, that could be a real bonding situation.
Christine
First of all, I went in the room and you know, they've been trying
Jay Oakerson
to court you for Gas Digital management for years now.
Christine
Yeah, that's what my career is heading. That's what Lewis wants. All of us working under him at Gas Digital.
Jay Oakerson
You, Louis, you, Louis and Kurt Metzger should do a three person tour together.
Christine
Yeah, that sounds fun.
Jay Oakerson
I think a tour bus, but like more like a small tour bus. Like a camper.
Christine
Yeah, yeah, that will work.
Jay Oakerson
Yeah, but only with one big bedroom and see who gets it.
Christine
I would just talk to Kurt all day and just let him talk to me.
Jay Oakerson
Yeah, you wouldn't really be talking to Kurt. You'd be listening to Kurt all day.
Christine
Exactly. L would be like, bobby, I gotta talk to you. I can't right now. I'm learning about Jewel. Lasers.
Female Caller
Yeah.
Jay Oakerson
Louis will be in the back screaming at somebody like, who knows what. Something with his house. Maybe an employee, maybe a boss. Doesn't matter.
Christine
I don't have a boss. I am all, yeah, this is gonna be fun. This will be fun. And I am buying merch. I'm buying it right when I walk in.
Laura
You never not bought merch.
Christine
I told you, I'm a merch whore.
Jay Oakerson
Can we look up what his merch is?
Christine
Would love that. I almost bought Keanu Reeves band merch yesterday.
Jay Oakerson
Dog star.
Christine
Yeah.
Jay Oakerson
Why?
Christine
I don't know.
Jay Oakerson
Where was it?
Christine
I was. I was listening to some of his songs. The new. The new songs they came up with.
Jay Oakerson
Why?
Christine
I don't know. Just check it out. Because I wanted to check it out, see if it was good.
Jay Oakerson
It's not.
Christine
It's all right.
Jay Oakerson
Nope.
Christine
I didn't mind it.
Jay Oakerson
Yeah. Well, good. You're probably hiring to play a fucking feeling. Don't renew your vowels. Let's see. It just says the word idols.
Laura
Yeah, that's pretty cool.
Christine
What is it? Let me see it.
Jay Oakerson
It says idols, but it's a super tight tank top which I think you should get.
Christine
They have to have xx.
Jay Oakerson
Treat it like shell. Treat it like shapewear.
Announcer
Great news for comedy TV fans. Every episode of The Hulu original series Alice and Steve is streaming on Hulu from the producers of Baby Reindeer Best Alice and Steve see their world implode when Steve starts dating Alice's 26 year old daughter. When the once rock solid friendship turns sour, these best friends make the best enemies. Watch every episode of Alice and Steve on Hulu and Hulu on Disney for bundle subscribers. Terms apply.
Jay Oakerson
These days, a free offer doesn't stay free for long. The hidden fee starts stacking up. Service fees, activation fees. Next thing you know, it's not free at all. But at Metro by T Mobile you can get the new Samsung Galaxy A17.5G phone free and save with no activation fees. That's about $250 back in your pocket. What could you do with that? So many things. You could buy junk food or video games. Or maybe go buy a ticket to the theater. They say the theater is dying. Help them out. You got 250 extra dollars in your pocket. Get that more for your money feeling only at Metro. What are you waiting for? Find your local store. Just bring your number and sign up for the $40 period. Plan savings based on device discount and waived activation fee. Not available. If you were with Metro or T Mobile in the past 180 days I
Christine
went to Cuba last year, went through a hurricane and speak Spanish and it really hit me. I speak one language. Most Americans only speak one language and everybody else speaks two or three. And I vowed that day to learn Spanish and I'm going to go back to Cuba and know how to get bread, say hello, check into my hotel, do all the stuff I wanted to do that I couldn't do last year. That's happening with Babel. If you're traveling this summer, here is a real travel hack. Don't wait until you land to start learning the language. Instead, try babbel. Even just 10 minutes a day. That's what I do with Babbel can help you start having real conversations in as little as three weeks. Lessons are quick, practical and built by more than 200 language experts. And instead of memorizing random vocab, you're learning phrases you'll use, ordering dinner, asking for directions, or talking with locals. That's what you need. This is how you learn the language by speaking it. Now I can go into a store, I talk to the guys at the garage. I can actually have a conversation. Am I fluent yet? No, but I'm definitely getting better at Spanish. Babbel's awesome. If you've got summer travel coming up, now's the time to Start so you can actually use what you learn on the trip. Right now Babel is offering listeners up to 60% off. Go to babbel.com bonfire that's Babbel B A B B E L.com bonfire for up to 60% off. Rules and restrictions may apply.
Laura
My name?
Shannon Maldonado
My name is Shannon Maldonado. I'm the founder of Yaoi, a gift shop from the lens of artists and handmade objects. I chose Shopify because when I was testing other platforms it was definitely one of the most user friendly. It was important to me to think about where we would be in the future. All of the tools for reading your sales, like planning inventory, they're just right there on your dashboard. For anyone starting a small business, the biggest thing I can tell you, it doesn't have to be perfect. Shopify can help you build upon it. Start your free trial on shopify.com I'm Hannah. I've lost 75 pounds in 20 months with GLP1s/ diet and exercise on RO. I've gone from struggling to run a mile to running farther every day. You can access FDA approved GLP1s online. Get the support you need to reach your weight loss goals. Go to ROE Co Weight to see if you qualify. I'm a paid ROE partner. 20% average weight loss in one year in non diabetics with obesity or overweight with a weight related medical condition versus 3.1% in placebo arm Rx only to stay informed about serious side effects. Go to RO Co Safety Parents.
Announcer
Have you heard your kids say I'm not a math kid? Well, with Mathnasium every kid can be a math kid. They customize their math instructions so kids who are struggling are able to catch up and get ahead. And advanced kids are challenged to reach higher. Mathnasium makes math fun so kids learn to love it. Parents say that Mathnasium has not only improved their kids grades, it's given them a new level of confidence in math and in school overall. Visit mathnasium.com to find a location near you.
Christine
Is it all girl shit? What does that say?
Jay Oakerson
Don't forget to live. No, I want you to have just his eyes looking at you.
Laura
That's what I want.
Jay Oakerson
That's the front.
Christine
I want to get that as wallpaper.
Jay Oakerson
Yeah, just his eyes looking at you or the one of him just enjoying the scally cap.
Christine
I like that one. The white one looks great.
Jay Oakerson
Yeah, it's right. Just to have a fucking boy you met on your shirt.
Christine
That one's good. What else?
Jay Oakerson
A poster yes.
Christine
Not getting a poster. I don't like posters.
Jay Oakerson
A hoodie. Get Max a fucking my parents don't get me shirt. I already told you all the writing on the arms.
Christine
Max said I don't want one.
Jay Oakerson
Of course he doesn't. Oh, I'll get foam fingers. Let me see him.
Laura
Yeah, the foam fingers are cool.
Jay Oakerson
I'll totally get the foam fingers.
Christine
All right, I'll get you the foam fingers. I'm getting the shirt. The White Shirt xl.
Jay Oakerson
Yeah. Do you think they make a left and right? Because I would like to double it.
Christine
Maybe it's on the back and front so you can just either or.
Jay Oakerson
But then it would.
Christine
I think they do. I think they do. I think they have one on the left. Well, there you go. Don't forget to live just one direction.
Jay Oakerson
Foam finger, young.
Christine
Block that a bit.
Guest or Additional Male
Click it.
Jay Oakerson
See if you could choose left and right.
Guest or Additional Male
I'm gonna pick. I'm telling you because I'm taking bets now. Bobby is gonna pick the one with his eyes. Because you want to walk around with his gaze on your shirt, on your chest, Bobby.
Christine
No, I like the other one.
Jay Oakerson
Just having a nice laugh.
Christine
I feel shit when I wake up. Oh, that's a good one.
Jay Oakerson
Oh, happy. Get the pink one to go with your Stanley Cup. Oh, look at the one with the underneath shirt built in. I'll get that. Dude, you want to dress like. We're going to see Avril Lavigne.
Christine
Right after him. We should get DJ Lou the old biker cap, the painter cap.
Jay Oakerson
I'm gonna get Jacob a tour poster.
Christine
Oh, that poster.
Jay Oakerson
And I'm gonna have a professionally framed in museum glass so he has to respect it as a gift. Unsigned nothing, just a poster.
Christine
That's a cool poster.
Jay Oakerson
That looks like.
Christine
That looks like something you give as a Christmas gift card.
Jay Oakerson
Something you give to a 12 year old girl to let her start masturbating and don't ask questions. Yeah, this is what a girl fucking grinds her pillow. Bobby, put it in your gym.
Christine
I'm sorry, what?
Jay Oakerson
We said put it in your sauna, dude.
Christine
Put it. My sauna.
Laura
Bobby was lost in the poster.
Christine
I'm sorry, I was just checking out the poster.
Jay Oakerson
Dude, put in your sauna and then when you come on the bottom, it's gonna fry like egg whites.
Christine
Well, he's got a bandana, Jay, look at that. Get that to hang out of the back of your ass.
Jay Oakerson
I don't wear bandanas. I wear afghans in my backpack.
Christine
Let me see. That's a cool one. Maybe I'll get that.
Jay Oakerson
I'll get the date back. Chwofer. The twofer. Twofer.
Christine
What's that one? Let me see that. Oh, it just says idols on the front.
Guest or Additional Male
Yeah.
Jay Oakerson
And you get a little T shirt. Long sleeve T shirt underneath a short T shirt, but they're connected probably at the elbow.
Christine
I'm gonna get the bandana and see if he'll wipe his sweat on it.
Jay Oakerson
Oh, that would be fucking nice. I'm gonna hold the poster open all night. It's gonna walk on like this, but the top hand is gonna be confusingly the. The foam fingers. It's gonna be a pain in the ass. Or how about the poster of just two? Yeah. Black and white torp. Him just looking at you.
Christine
No, that's too creepy.
Jay Oakerson
What are you talking about?
Christine
It looks like the crow.
Jay Oakerson
The thing about this, if you put them in the back of your bathroom when you hop in the shower and you close the door.
Laura
20. Nice.
Guest or Additional Male
He rides a horse onto the stage. Bobby.
Laura
No, that was just in Texas.
Christine
Oh, he what?
Guest or Additional Male
He rode in horse onto the stage in Texas.
Christine
That's cool.
Guest or Additional Male
It is cool.
Jay Oakerson
What do you think he's going to do here? Ride a horse and carriage and the horse just dies on the stage. The horse just falls over and dies.
Christine
You know, he's just going to come out here at Radio City. It's just a. It's not going to be a lot of crazy shit.
Jay Oakerson
Did that just happen? I just saw a thing online. I thought that just happened. I didn't realize. It's a thing that happens a lot. The horses just collapse and die on the street.
Female Voice (Ad)
Street.
Jay Oakerson
The carriage horses.
Christine
Yeah. You're not supposed to like horses even. Like, back in the day, you see these westerns where they ride the horse for like two hours or six hours and you can't. You can only ride a horse for a little bit and it has to take a break. It has to get water. You have to let it cool down. You can only use, like, even the guys on the. Like. I've been watching a lot of rodeo stuff.
Jay Oakerson
Why?
Christine
I don't know, dude. I just got into like, bull. Bull riding. Like, I just got into rodeo stuff. I don't know why.
Laura
Yellowstone maybe.
Jay Oakerson
Maybe Yellowstone got you.
Christine
I don't know.
Jay Oakerson
Maybe now Dutton Ranch has you.
Christine
But yeah, they can only, like. They have to bring, like, when they do. When they do cattle, they have to, like, one guy has to have like three to four horses to work them. He can only work a horse for like one, two days and then get a fresh horse or the horse will die.
Jay Oakerson
So these shows are bullshit.
Christine
Yeah, well, they. Yeah, well, they don't. Yeah. They're kind of bullshit. Yeah. You can't just ride a horse for days.
Jay Oakerson
I just have a hard time with these shows with Dutton Ranch again, too. That they keep bringing up that he fucking. How much they're willing to die and kill. I just realized that watching the show, they've made it such a romance.
Christine
Yeah.
Jay Oakerson
Between Beth and him. That I forgot that Rip has killed multiple people in complete cold blood. Viciously.
Christine
I know.
Jay Oakerson
Threw them off of a cliff to disappear so their families could never have closure. Many times. Yeah. During the show.
Guest or Additional Male
Yeah.
Christine
The buzzing like the train station.
Jay Oakerson
He goes, what the fuck is this life? Why is it the mom was like my. My father until the day he died fighting for his land. It's like, what a dumb thing to have to do. And he just gave it to the fucking engines anyway.
Christine
I don't think they're called Indians, but. Yeah, he did.
Jay Oakerson
Yes, they are.
Christine
He gave it their. Their Native American Indians.
Jay Oakerson
Savages.
Christine
No. I mean, yes, but no Redskins. Well, he gave it. He gave the land to have it in a preserve so people wouldn't build on it. Because the Indians aren't going to build on it.
Jay Oakerson
I know. They're not going to do fucking anything on it.
Christine
That's what he wanted.
Jay Oakerson
Christine was saying that the other day, which really defeats the purpose of all that land.
Christine
But if you watch the. What was it? The 1820, 1886.
Jay Oakerson
I never will.
Christine
If you watch that one, you see that when he got to that land, Indian. One of the Indians said, you know, you can go up there and there's land. You can take your family for a few gener. You know, like, you can have it for five generations, but then you have to give it back.
Jay Oakerson
Really.
Christine
That's what. Yeah.
Jay Oakerson
Isn't a generation 100 years?
Christine
Yeah. You see? Which is a. You know, he was like, you can have it. And 500 years, something like that.
Jay Oakerson
It's longer than black people were enslaved.
Christine
Yeah.
Female Voice (Ad)
Was.
Christine
It was like 100 years. More.
Jay Oakerson
Yeah. We've all heard the same complaint. 400 years of oppression. That's the only reason. We all know that number. I've never done any research on it. I just accept black people are right. It'd be great to find out slightly less and always correct. That would be such a up move. 400 years of oppression goes 396. But that doesn't matter. It is fucked up still. But it wasn't quite 400. But it does suck. Yeah. No, it's not cool, for sure, but just facts, facts. It wasn't 400 years.
Christine
396.
Jay Oakerson
Whatever they do when it's like 6 million Jews. More like 4 million Jews, because it's a lot of millions of Jews. Okay, take those two off. Take those 2 million off. It's still a lot. I think
Christine
Madonna needs to fucking stop.
Jay Oakerson
Oh, the thing in the park. Well, first of all, can you do a bunch of songs no one's ever heard of before? Also, so. Hey, do me a favor. Do a bunch of songs no one's ever fucking heard of before.
Christine
Yeah. Can you wear an outfit that makes me want to throw up when I see you in it?
Jay Oakerson
Oh, yeah. Can your old beaten and battered box fucking also swallow up your fucking little panties outfit?
Christine
It's so gross. And her legs. There's no muscle tone on her legs. And it just goes up to this ass she had put in Mexico 15 years ago that won't die.
Jay Oakerson
Oh, her ass is busted as shit. Looking from the side, and she just. She looks like. It looks like someone let Nan out.
Christine
Yeah. Yeah.
Guest or Additional Male
I told Bob she dances with a. A shower rod.
Jay Oakerson
Oh, yeah. Yeah. But she's just like. But her dances are always just. By the way, when you get a little bit older, she's taking a. A page at a little Kim. That's what little Kim does. Now she can't really do anything else because she's so, like, heavy. So she just does like, a weird, like, robot dance. But what a way to kick off pride parade.
Christine
I guess she's the queen of it, right?
Jay Oakerson
The queen of pride. Queen of gays, I guess the queen of gays. But, I mean, what a shitty set list.
Christine
Look at her. Look at this. Look at the.
Jay Oakerson
The.
Christine
Just the size of her box, by the way. And then.
Jay Oakerson
And then I was. I saw this with Christine, and she was. She made a good point. Two girls come out, like, why would they bring out these girls with great bodies? And she goes, they probably both have dicks. And she's probably right.
Guest or Additional Male
Right.
Jay Oakerson
She's probably right there. Probably both men.
Christine
Yeah. They're not bringing out regular girls to this. Look at all these people dancing it.
Jay Oakerson
Bobby.
Laura
That's a.
Jay Oakerson
That's part of the show.
Christine
Oh, sorry. All right.
Jay Oakerson
You think everyone just figured this out? Yeah.
Christine
Have it inside.
Guest or Additional Male
It's going to be you in a couple hours.
Jay Oakerson
Oh, Bobby, me and you should work out some. We should work out something and do it in the aisle.
Christine
Oh, she can't. She has to slowly get off the piano now.
Jay Oakerson
No, she takes her jack. She takes her jacket off, and you can see her turkey arms.
Laura
She looks better here than what I saw.
Christine
Please, just cover it all like the lead singer from Hart. Cover it all in black and sit in a chair and just give us the stuff.
Jay Oakerson
No, you don't have to even sing anymore. She's singing, Jay.
Guest or Additional Male
You're right. She wears those long, elegant gloves that go up to her bicep. But then there's. Bicep to shoulder is complete flab.
Jay Oakerson
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Christine
It looks like an unstuffed sausage.
Jay Oakerson
Skip ahead in this, Bobby. Those are also part of the show. Yeah, look, she's doing this. There's doing her robot dance. There we go. But here's the thing. She could have just not done that.
Christine
Yeah.
Jay Oakerson
She could have just wore, like, a big, like, costumey thing.
Laura
Yeah.
Christine
She could have covered all her flaws
Jay Oakerson
instead of riding this trans or whatever the she's doing.
Christine
Yeah.
Jay Oakerson
I wanted. I wanted to be women because I said, these girls are way hotter than Madonna. But I guess what I mean is those guys are way hotter than Madonna.
Laura
Yeah.
Jay Oakerson
I still mean it.
Laura
Where is a state?
Jay Oakerson
Like, I look at her hanging off her stages.
Christine
They put her on. She's getting sick right now from the stage.
Guest or Additional Male
All right.
Christine
Looks like an armpit.
Jay Oakerson
It really does.
Christine
Oh, God. Oh, thank God. They covered it with a speaker. They literally like, hey, we're gonna put this speaker in front of your old snatch.
Jay Oakerson
I think they plugged it into it. Dude. Big Daddy Kane, Vanilla Ice, Tupac this time.
Guest or Additional Male
People dreamed about that box now.
Christine
Yeah, man.
Jay Oakerson
You almost. I gotta go back and watch Borderline to remember when I wanted to pop it in her.
Christine
Those are 100 guys, too. Those are not girls. Those are trans.
Jay Oakerson
That's what I said.
Christine
Oh, look at that thing.
Guest or Additional Male
I still got it.
Jay Oakerson
No, no, she doesn't. It looks like she's doing that to get her blood. Photo reverse. Yeah, she has her legs up. She's trying to bring her feet back to life,
Christine
man. It's funny. She can just go from one pose to the other very slowly and then stay in a pose for like a. Like a minute.
Jay Oakerson
She has no choice. Sponsored by Icy Hot.
Christine
Sponsored by Activa.
Jay Oakerson
Look at her fucking ghoul face. She also, like. See, I think she comes up there and lip syncs songs that no one knows.
Christine
Yeah. I don't know.
Jay Oakerson
I don't give a fuck. If you've been doing music for 50 years, you gotta do the ones from the first 10 that everyone knows.
Laura
The Confessions, too. It's a brand New album. And I think the only reason she agreed to this was to do her new stuff.
Female Caller
Oh.
Laura
She's like, I'll do your free pride show, but it's gonna be all my new album. And the gay. I mean, I feel like almost like.
Christine
Is that Mike Feeney?
Jay Oakerson
Yeah. Who's the regular fucking dj? Fucking DJ Eric.
Christine
Guarantee he has a podcast about technology.
Jay Oakerson
Yeah.
Christine
What the fuck is that? Dj, man?
Jay Oakerson
That's DJ Peter Sanderson. Just a guy. DJ Peter Sanderson?
Guest or Additional Male
Yeah.
Jay Oakerson
I got a graduate degree in special education.
Christine
Oh, look at her tits. Just trying to mush out of that bra mess.
Jay Oakerson
Dude, thank God Tupac's dead. Doesn't have to look at what he's done.
Christine
She's terrible.
Jay Oakerson
I meant Tupac would have to be like, nah, man, this was like ray of light.
Christine
I'm so sick of it too. She's on everything right now. She's on everything doing. It's like you. You have to age gracefully. You have to figure it. Like Stevie Nicks figured it out. You know, she. She age gracefully. Do stop trying to be what you were 20 years ago.
Jay Oakerson
Also at this age, dude, there's no way. I'll tell you why she's got something thick under there. Because she's peed a little, a lot on that performance. Oh, my God. Non stop pissing if she can't hold it in. Yeah. She had kids, right?
Christine
Yeah. Look at that. I mean, that's Madonna. That's Madonna, by the way. That's also.
Jay Oakerson
That's when she figured it out. Because if you go back to her big bush pictures when she was younger, she's actually kind of crud looking there, like facially even. She wasn't even very.
Christine
Yeah, she looked like a guinea from Staten island back in the day.
Jay Oakerson
But she had those big muff pictures.
Christine
These are the black and white photos they took. And she's. Her body is probably, I mean, perfect at that time.
Jay Oakerson
She's killing it pretty hard.
Christine
Her breasts were. And those are natural tits. She had great natural tits.
Jay Oakerson
Them breasts. Like we were a doctor's office.
Christine
And then her breasts were world class. Her box. Her breast. I call them breasts now.
Jay Oakerson
Nice.
Christine
Cuz that's what they are. But those.
Jay Oakerson
Now they are.
Guest or Additional Male
Yeah.
Jay Oakerson
Now it's her bosom.
Christine
Yeah. Perfect box. Shaved. Nice shave box. So nice, so smoky.
Jay Oakerson
Good shave box. Good shave box.
Christine
Yeah, we don't. I don't want to see.
Laura
Oh, there you go, J. Oh, what a pig.
Jay Oakerson
These are the young pictures we're showing pictures of her.
Guest or Additional Male
The horror that we're looking At.
Christine
But this was before women started shaving. Their box walks nice and tight. Right.
Jay Oakerson
It's not looking. Her body's still good. Everything. I'm just saying, like, everything's so cruddy about her. It takes away. You don't think her face is that hot. I wouldn't have thought much of her face in this picture at all.
Guest or Additional Male
We're looking at a picture where we don't know whether there's more hair on our puss or between her or on.
Christine
But she didn't shave the side hair on her.
Jay Oakerson
Right.
Christine
She has the hair that grows out up to the leg.
Jay Oakerson
Yeah, that's the thing.
Christine
Oh, God. And then.
Guest or Additional Male
She's disgusting.
Christine
She has full armpit hair.
Jay Oakerson
She's disgusting.
Female Caller
Pig.
Christine
Yeah.
Jay Oakerson
Yeah, for sure.
Christine
My God.
Jay Oakerson
Makes me sick.
Christine
Yeah. But she did have a great. I mean, under all that hair, under that Sasquatch hair, she did have a great body.
Jay Oakerson
Yeah.
Christine
Smoking body. Natural.
Jay Oakerson
Great body. And then she eventually figured out, like, her face and hair.
Christine
Yeah, her nips are perfect. Little tiny round nipples.
Jay Oakerson
Good little nips. The whole thing's popping good. But it just. It aged and like, you know.
Christine
Yeah.
Jay Oakerson
If you. Listen, if you're making hot dogs and one burns up, you don't showcase that one, you know, I mean, the grizzled up one. You show all the juicy plumpers.
Christine
Yeah. A bit naked. She looks like a bowl of clam chowder right now.
Jay Oakerson
She's hunched over with a fucking fake ass. She looks ridiculous. She's a hunchback.
Guest or Additional Male
Went to her back in the day and said, you should probably shave your armpits. And she said, I'll give it some thought. But, like, somebody had to tell her, is what I'm saying, that that's not a good look for you.
Christine
No, I think. I think that was an artsy thing. I think she probably did. She probably did that. There was probably a time when having armpit hair was like, a woman free. I'm just gonna be me type thing. And they took those photos. And then if I grew up in
Jay Oakerson
the 70s, I would have been arrested for punching women. If you have armpit hair, you're a guy. There you go. Hey, let me check your pits real quick. Oh, let me see that up. Wolf pits.
Guest or Additional Male
Women knew to be human beings. Like in the 50s or 40s. I think they shaved their arms, armpits or 30s.
Christine
No, I think they started. I think they started shaving in the. I think they started shaving and taking care of everything in the 70s and 80s.
Jay Oakerson
In the 70s, they let it go.
Christine
60s, they let it go. 70s, they started changing over.
Guest or Additional Male
But you can watch countless classic movies. And they have shaved armpits by Gillette. God bless Gillette.
Jay Oakerson
So now you don't have to be with a woman with an armpit, but you like that a little.
Christine
I don't. I don't like it. But I've been with it, and it didn't bother me as much as I thought it was gonna bother me.
Jay Oakerson
I was training for tonight.
Christine
If I. If I had the choice, I wouldn't. If I was like, hey, do you want me to grow my armpit hair or not? I'd be like, don't. I don't like hair. Like, I like a nice. But I don't like bald either. I hate bald. I like a little hair down there.
Jay Oakerson
Oh, I'm for sure.
Christine
I don't like a bald pussy. See, I don't. I don't see the little zit roots,
Jay Oakerson
but yeah, that is fun.
Christine
You know what I mean?
Jay Oakerson
A thousand black spots.
Christine
Yeah, it looks like the underneath of a black guy's neck.
Guest or Additional Male
Black guy no good.
Christine
I'm sorry. Black L. Jacob.
Female Voice (Ad)
Come on.
Laura
Jacob.
Jay Oakerson
Jacob.
Guest or Additional Male
Like a Jesus.
Christine
Jacob.
Jay Oakerson
Oh, my God. Jacob.
Guest or Additional Male
Jacob.
Jay Oakerson
I don't want to dig into it too much now, but when we come back from break, I want to tell you about this Michael Jackson documentary.
Christine
Oh, I'm excited. We know we didn't go over Fenoy's thing yesterday.
Jay Oakerson
I know. He escaped.
Christine
Oh, God. I watched a little bit of it. His first fake laugh.
Jay Oakerson
Oh, yeah, I know.
Laura
Wow.
Jay Oakerson
Mike's a. Throw his head back and laugh.
Christine
Yeah, you have to just to look up a gun and go, I'm sorry. Please forgive me.
Jay Oakerson
Wow, he really enjoyed it.
Christine
Oh, he really had a good chuckle at a lot of those jokes. He really thought it was a hoot.
Jay Oakerson
He was having a hoot.
Christine
He was having a hoot.
Jay Oakerson
Nanny, no doubt.
Female Caller
Hang on.
Jay Oakerson
You got it.
Christine
This is the first one. Yeah, this is the first one.
Jay Oakerson
Get rid of Madonna. Why does Madonna walk like Igor from Young Frankenstein?
Laura
She's really old.
Jay Oakerson
You can't hear it.
Female Caller
I want to answer because my husband's into repairing the house and stuff, and I don't want to seem jaded. It's just I watch all those romantic movies. I'm getting choked up.
Jay Oakerson
I hate the show so much.
Female Caller
We should be painting the house together, all in love. And then he paints my nose, and then I paint him. And then before you know it, it, we're doing it.
Guest or Additional Male
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Female Caller
Have you ever done a Home repair project together. It doesn't end in doing it.
Christine
There you go.
Female Caller
My husband did not want to make love when I. Mike.
Jay Oakerson
Twiddling his fingers.
Christine
I mean, buddy, that got him. That got him.
Jay Oakerson
That's not the first one, dude.
Christine
That was. He laughed like that. When you say something funny, there's.
Jay Oakerson
There's the first one that makes me
Christine
question everything he's laughed at on this show.
Jay Oakerson
There's one where he jams his head back. I mean, head to the. It pins it. It's so good. It might be after this guy's routine.
Christine
I'm so sick of that look, too. That merchant marine hat on the back of your head indoors when it's hot.
Jay Oakerson
Oh, why? Why? Because it's. He's a young dock worker.
Christine
Exactly.
Guest or Additional Male
I hate it. He just came back.
Jay Oakerson
He just came back from the lunch truck getting some chow.
Christine
Yeah, we'll pull it over your ears if you cold. Not just. It's not a yamaka, dude.
Jay Oakerson
He's got to go right from here. Back to the fish market.
Christine
Yeah, exactly.
Jay Oakerson
He's gotta throw fish and catch it with newspapers or something.
Guest or Additional Male
Oh, look at.
Christine
Mike's waiting to get. Wait. He's waiting for the punchline to fake. Of course.
Jay Oakerson
He hates this.
Christine
He's literally timing the punchline.
Female Caller
I had to grow the whole shirt, man.
Jay Oakerson
The Hooper.
Female Caller
How far down am I supposed to shave? It's rude to ask. Hey, where's the line, Sasquatch?
Jay Oakerson
Can I tell you, Bobby? Tell me any comedian, please.
Christine
Mike just went like this with his eyes. He literally went, wake up. He literally just went, stay in a kid, stay in it.
Jay Oakerson
Without naming them.
Christine
Yeah.
Jay Oakerson
Have you ever appreciated someone doing, like, the. The real, like, chosen delivery and comedy? I know it's a genre of comics. Doesn't bother me at all. But like, the. Everything subliminal or the misdirect or the not even hers isn't even misdirect. Her thing's more like everything's told. Like, can you believe it? And then he said, that's not how it works. Like, it's like she's. This delivery is like, chosen to be like a character. Jeremy Hots, Kathleen Madigan, that kind of thing.
Christine
I gotta be honest. I came up in that. That was the big comedy when I came up. Bobby Collins, Rosie, that those type of people were Richard. Richard Jennings. Jennings.
Jay Oakerson
No, not Jenny. Richard Lewis.
Christine
No, Richard Lewis, but Richard Jennings, too. They just had that. You know what I mean?
Jay Oakerson
No, but Richard Jenning was just doing. He was doing stand up. He had a shticky Thing. I'm not talking about Shticky, like, talking about jokes. No, I'm talking about, like, really the thing is, like, you know, Jeremy Hots. And so they do the comedy, and it's like, it's like, have you ever noticed a thing? And then the punchline comes, you know, I mean, it's like a. It's like a chosen delivery thing. Emo Phillips, stuff like that.
Christine
I think I, When I first started, I would, I would laugh at that stuff, but because I hung out with, like, Patrice and the Boston, like, Steve Sweeney and Kevin Knox, we came up in that fucking in your face type thing. I was phased out of that pretty quick.
Jay Oakerson
I wasn't even in your. The idea of being in your face. What. I was drawn to the comics, especially with Kem up here and the back table of the cell, or all you guys, was more just like, well, what I want to showcase is, like, the funny that I am here. You know, I mean, like, talking to my friends and being funny like that, it's not. I never. My friends weren't coming over, and I go, today I'm just gonna talk in a weird, Like, I'm gonna be super anxious and strange.
Christine
Mitch Fatale, right? That type of stuff. No, I, I, I got out of that pretty quick when I'm. When I was. The last few years in Boston, and then when I moved to New York, I was at the Boston Comedy Club, and it was, you know, Jay Moore, it was Patrice, it was Norton, it was Voss, it was me. So when I saw that stuff, it just, just, it doesn't hit me. It just, I, it just never hit me because I, I. But it's almost like knowing the magic trick, you know, if you don't know the magic trick. If I don't. If I don't. I know what he's doing. I've talked to him off stage. I understand. So when I see him do that, I can't, I can't enjoy it. But if you're, if you're an audience member and you see this guy, is that him? Oh, my God. So it's like.
Jay Oakerson
No, I get getting it for sure. So when, you know, it's like a thing like, like, when, you know, it's like characters, even the wrong words, like a chosen, like, way of talking, it's a gimmick. And it's when they come off stage and they're not, like, you know, almost getting ready to cry with every word anymore, and they go. And you go, funny show. And they go, oh, hey, thanks.
Christine
Yeah, it's yeah.
Jay Oakerson
And you're like, wait, I thought you were.
Christine
Yeah.
Jay Oakerson
I came back here to console you. Are you not almost gonna cry about everything you said?
Christine
Yeah.
Laura
Doing it as, like, a performance character.
Christine
Yeah, I. I just. I. Once I knew the trick, I was like, I can't really walk. It doesn't affect me the way it should. But I understand how it affects an audience because they don't know the trick. They think that that's. They think Mitch Patel is a grown baby, but he is talking about getting his dick sucked.
Jay Oakerson
But he is. But, like, you know, also, like, a regular dude and a creep like anybody else. He's not a baby.
Laura
Has he been in, like, LA forever?
Jay Oakerson
No, no, no. I think he went to Colorado or
Laura
something because he wasn't here. I don't. I. I only knew him because he had that head shot at the Cellar with the girl.
Christine
He was pretty stood out. He was killing it for a minute. I remember when I went to Aspen, him and Aziz won comic of the festival. They split it. They tied or some. And it was so funny because I,
Jay Oakerson
Kevin Brennan, wanted the year I won.
Christine
I actually thought I was in the running. I was there, and I was like, in my brain, I'm like, what are you gonna say? I think about, what are you gonna do?
Jay Oakerson
And I want to make sure I don't forget to thank anybody.
Christine
And I remember my first set there. I fell on. I. That's right after we did Torgasm, and I jumped up in the. I was bombing. I couldn't breathe because I've never been to Denver or to Colorado. And I remember I was. I was losing perspective. And then I jumped up and my knee folded and I fell on the ground in pain, screaming. And they thought it was a bit.
Jay Oakerson
Your knee has been your enemy.
Christine
Yeah. I remember they were laughing. It was like, one of the only parts. They were laughing at my set, and I was just on the. On the ground, really in pain. And then I had to go backstage, and they put me on an oxygen tank, and I just felt like a loser. But I. I remember that. Day one, but he was big for a minute, and then he just.
Jay Oakerson
Well, he was disappeared. He was a Tonight show regular and, like, a correspondent. He was. He started off. He was like a Howard Stern, like. Yeah, intern.
Guest or Additional Male
Yep.
Jay Oakerson
Yeah, he was an intern for a while, and then he started getting, like, stuff.
Christine
He didn't have a baby voice back then, though.
Jay Oakerson
Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Yeah. He kind of did his thing on Howard Stern, and then, like. And then tonight's show. He got very popular and he was, like, touring, like, forever or something. He came. I knew his name. I knew him from, like, TV stuff before I ever, like, came up to New York and met him.
Christine
Well, I remember Gary Gulman was dating April Macy, and then Mitch Fattell took her from Gary.
Jay Oakerson
No.
Christine
Yeah.
Jay Oakerson
Was it a swipe or was it a. Broke up at one and then he came in. By the way, if you ever showed Mitch Patel and a younger Gary Gomen and be like, which one of these guys takes the other one's girl? Like, no way. It's Mitch Patel taking Gary Goldman.
Christine
Mitch Patel's got a big piece, though.
Jay Oakerson
Shut up.
Christine
Swear to God.
Jay Oakerson
Gary's probably got a nice swinger now. It's a little tiny ding. A ling.
Christine
No, he's gonna tie him.
Jay Oakerson
He's got regular. You heard it here first. Bobby said Gary Goldman's got a tiny.
Christine
Gary's got a regular penis. But Mitch has got a.
Jay Oakerson
What's regular? He's like six. Six?
Christine
Yeah. For him, it's like a regular dick.
Jay Oakerson
An eight inch.
Christine
Well, I'm just saying. I don't really know what Gary's dick
Jay Oakerson
is, but I jerk off an 8 inch cock. Jacob.
Christine
I've never heard. Gary. Gary never. I've never heard anything about Gary's penis. I've heard. I've heard about Mishra tells Big dick.
Jay Oakerson
Yeah, but you went looking for that information.
Christine
That stuff just comes to you, Jay.
Jay Oakerson
Yeah.
Christine
Yeah. It just comes to you.
Jay Oakerson
I believe you. We gotta take a break. Ooh, Bobby.
Christine
Yeah.
Jay Oakerson
Oh, we're only one more commercial. We're only one more segment of radio away from you seeing your boyfriend.
Christine
I'm kind of nervous now.
Jay Oakerson
I know. What if he doesn't remember you? It's gonna suck.
Guest or Additional Male
No.
Christine
What if my fantasy comes true?
Jay Oakerson
Why?
Christine
I don't know.
Jay Oakerson
Don't feel bad, dude. It's two blocks to walk back to my car.
Christine
No, I'm not leaving you, man.
Jay Oakerson
Buddy, I'm not gonna sit there and wait all night while you have emotional sex with this guy. If you were gonna go just back there and suck him off and hold his foreskin back while Laura polishes not Job. Yeah, I'll wait for that. But if you're gonna go back there and try to look at his eyes all night and tell him about your dreams and what your fantasy was, this night was gonna be, I'm gonna have to go.
Christine
I should have wore the red jacket. God damn it.
Jay Oakerson
You let Max talk you out of having a great night.
Christine
He really alpha brode he shaned me out of my outfit.
Jay Oakerson
Should we take a break? Should we go take a break? We'll come back, we'll do plugs later. Yeah?
Christine
Yeah. Why not?
Female Caller
All right.
Jay Oakerson
Why not? It's Young Blood Day.
Christine
Young Blood.
Jay Oakerson
It's the bonfire.
Christine
You can't be good. Be careful.
Female Voice (Ad)
You ever wake up at like 3am and your bed is just warm for no reason? Like suddenly you're flipping your pillow, rotating like a rotisserie chicken, trying to find one cool spot that disappears immediately. At that point, you've kicked off the covers, adjusted the fan, maybe accepted your fate. That's why Coop's Sleep Goods made their cooling collection designed to stay cool all night, not just for the first five minutes. And right now it's 20% off, so you can retire the whole flip the pillow 47 times routine. Coop's pillows are adjustable, breathable, and made to help keep things cool while you sleep. Plus they have sheets and toppers so your whole setup can chill out. If your bed's been running a little warm, this is your moment. Go to coopsleepgoods.com Comedy that's coopsleepgoods.com comedy. And get 20% off.
Announcer
In the US there's a break in every 26 seconds. But when intruders step near Simplisafe, home security steps up.
Jay Oakerson
Stop. This is Simplisafe. Police are on the way.
Announcer
Using AI alerts, US based live agents help deter break ins. SimpliSafe. No long term contracts. Save 50% on your new system with professional monitoring at SimpliSafe.com sxm or with promo code sxm.
Jay Oakerson
Outdoor deterrence requires a Simplisafe Active Guard Outdoor Protection plan starting at $49.99 a month. Visit simplisafe.com licenses for alarm license information. Tennessee 2012.
Date: June 18, 2026
Main Theme:
A riotous, nitty-gritty backstage pass to comedy fandom, aging out of music, and the chaos and joy of being a grown-up superfan. Jay and Bobby prep for a Youngblud concert, roast each other’s fashion and obsessions, debate the state of rock stars, and gleefully eviscerate pop culture—from Youngblud’s allure to Madonna’s legacy—drawing on their lived experience in comedy and life.