Lemon Party with Chris Stanley

Summary

Podcast Summary

The Bonfire w/ Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly
Episode: Lemon Party with Chris Stanley
Original Air Date: December 18, 2025
Host: SiriusXM Faction Talk
Special Guests: Chris Stanley and Louis J. Gomez

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Episode Overview

This episode of "The Bonfire" delivers exactly what fans expect: unfiltered, offbeat, and darkly hilarious discussion about daily annoyances, city living, addiction documentaries, viral internet memes, and (infamously, this time) the depths of internet shock culture. Big Jay, guest co-host Louis J. Gomez, and frequent contributor Chris Stanley riff on everything from struggles with New York City life and the SiriusXM office holiday party to viral grime like "lemon party" and "blue waffle," drug epidemics, and (somehow) flashlight reviews. The conversation stays raw, self-deprecating, and peppered with gallows humor and references only longtime listeners could love.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Surviving New York City & The SiriusXM Holiday Party

• Office Holiday Chaos
  • Jay and Louis trade stories about navigating elevators and chaotic office spaces ("I got off the wrong elevator floor and walked directly through... Don't have my badge. So I got to get the thing. Then I get on 35 and actually ask a guy who's sweeping..." – Jay, 03:21).
  • General mania and inconvenience permeate the office ("It's a party in the halls...with a bunch of people I've never seen before. Always fun." – Louis, 05:04).
  • The everyday New York grind: thrown into slow-moving masses, locked-up pharmacy goods, “bodega madness,” and the casual, constant irritation ("It's just a giant mass of people bothering you all of the time." – Louis, 05:57).

2. The Miseries of City Bureaucracy & Social Decay

• DMVs and Post Offices
  • The hosts vent about the painful, often surreal, experience of city post offices and DMVs ("If it's in the five boroughs, it's like fucking Thunderdome." – Louis, 06:29).
  • Critique of infrastructure built for much smaller populations and not scaled to modern needs.
• Shoplifting & Urban Desperation
  • Bemoaning locked-up essentials at NYC pharmacies, tracing it to rampant theft and a comment on broader social breakdown.

3. Street Life, Poverty, and Addiction

• Addict Documentaries and Scam Respect
  • Jay relates memorable scams from HBO’s "Dope Sick Love," expressing both disgust and admiration for desperate criminal ingenuity ("Her two scams I respected the shit out of." – Jay, 08:54).
  • The scam: Fake prostitution turned robbery and the infamous receipt-return con for stolen goods.
• Kensington ‘Tranq’ Cam & Addiction Voyeurism
  • Live-describing the infamous Kensington, Philadelphia “tranq” (xylazine/fentanyl) corner cam ("This is live feed...I’ve definitely seen someone dead before." – Jay, 11:39).
  • Morbid but honest discussion of watching overdoses and Narcan revivals. ("When they bring fentanyl people back to life, they are never psyched about it." – Jay, 12:29).
  • Debate about the responsibility to help vs. distance oneself from public addicts ("Would you go over and see if you could get his heart going again?" – Jay → Christine, 16:34).

4. Viral Memes, Internet Culture, and Zoomers

• Skrilla & Local Viral Celebrities
  • The rise of bizarre figures like Skrilla, a minor Kensington street celebrity ("He’s a genuine dangerous individual...they had to go over to him, be like, dude, you have to stop coming on the court." – Jay, 18:22).
• The 'Six Seven' Meme
  • Bizarre inside-jokes and how nonsense memes take off ("Kids love six seven, but no one knows what it is...That’s why it’s the joke." – Jay & Louis, 13:53).
• Mr. Beast and ‘Beast Games’
  • The crew skewers reality/competition creator Mr. Beast for his algorithmic, emotionally manipulative tactics ("It’s pure human manipulation. Yeah, it's evil." – Louis, 21:15).
  • Riffing on the tragic contestants, especially a father with an incurable child, manipulating the audience’s empathy.

5. Internet Shock Culture: Lemon Party, Goats3e, Tub Girl

• What Is Lemon Party?
  • An entire (horrified, raucous) segment is dedicated to explaining, viewing, and commenting on the shock site Lemon Party ("It’s a single frame...three older men having a threesome." – Louis, 30:49).
  • Comparisons to other infamous shock images ("Goatse...Tub Girl...Blue Waffle...").
  • The hosts take a graphic tour through the images, evaluating the age, anatomy, and “production values” in a way only their show can ("Dicks look young as I’ve ever seen. See, dick don’t age." – Jay, 34:34).

Notable Quotes from this Segment

• "So we're watching older gay porn...it cuts to the cuck or the director and it's just a dude in a polo, smiling at the men making love." — Jay, 33:37-33:49
• "It's not what you pictured mature gentleman doing." — Jay, 33:28
• "Dick don't age. DDA." – Jay, 34:34
• "If this is...You get super upset about it being your mom. You immediately get way less upset about it being your grandma. You're like, get after grandma." – Jay, 37:47

6. Porn Trends, Sex Tech, and Family Taboos

• Porn Tech
  • Honest discussion of AI porn, blowjob machines, and absurd adult gadget engineering ("It's this big...what, you have to do and sit there to let it do...I feel silly. I couldn't get into a mode that I'm gonna come." – Jay, 48:40).
  • The Auto Blow and its rivals evaluated and ridiculed: "It looks like a humidifier."
• Old Lady Porn & Family Reactions
  • Wry, dark humor about generational change, the public nature of sexuality, and OnlyFans.
  • Grandkids “getting over” having porn star relatives: ("...by the time the grandkids get old enough...everyone gets, oh, you get over that quick now." – Jay, 38:23).

7. Macabre Humor: Funerals, Taxidermy, and Crime

• Wacky Funerals & Post-Mortem Displays
  • Jay brings up the Latin American custom of posing corpses ("They pose them up in Puerto Rico.") and human 'taxidermy,' generating morbid laughs.
  • Transition into true crime, cop shootings, and "tranq" gangrene.
• Gross Medical Oddities
  • The "Mexican tree boys" condition (epidermodysplasia verruciformis) comes up via a string of relentless banter about body horror.

8. Sports and Betting Sidebars

• Eagles Loss and Fantasy Football
  • Sports talk arises unexpectedly, with Louis defending his gambling “locks” and riffing on football heartbreaks.
  • ("That's fantastic numbers. If you threw all your money into that, Jacob, you'd be a wealthy man right now." – Jay, 50:25)
• The Sixers, Kevin Hart, & Epstein's Island
  • Bizarre hypothetical riffs about Kevin Hart, celebrity connections, and “island ledgers,” ending with, "That's my Roman Empire, I guess. Pedophilia Island." – Louis, 51:31

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Memorable Quotes & Moments (with Timestamps)

• Body Positivity, Jay-Style:

  • "My legs—they're fucking shredded from dragging around this big, blubbery torso my entire life." – Jay, 02:31

• On Public Bureaucracy:

  • "If it's within the five boroughs, it's like fucking Thunderdome." – Louis, 06:29
  • "The desperate and needy are the only people who need to go to the fucking post office." – Louis, 06:47

• Addict Redemption:

  • "When they bring fentanyl people back to life, they are never psyched about it." – Jay, 12:29
  • "You were dead. He goes, well, whatever. I was, it was awesome." – Jay, 12:40

• Lemon Party Discovery:

  • "It's porn...It's a single frame...three older men having a threesome." – Louis, 30:49
  • "Dick don't age. DDA. I mean, look how old that man's body is. But look how youthful his dick is in that other guy's mouth." – Jay, 34:34

• AI Porn Critique:

  • "Tired of masturbating alone? No...I've always done it that way." – Jay, 36:07
  • "Find ugly women in your neighborhood." – Louis, 36:27

• Old Lady Porn Reactions:

  • "By the time the grandkids get old enough...everyone gets, oh, you get over that quick now." – Jay, 38:23

• Sports Downturns:

  • "Imagine all the yards he would've had if he caught those two passes." – Jay, 49:44

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Noteworthy Segment Timestamps

• Struggles Getting to the Office Party: [03:05 – 06:04]
• NYC Post Office/DMV Nightmares: [06:12 – 07:25]
• Discussion of Drug Addiction, Scam Artists & Kensington Cam: [07:58 – 17:00]
• The Viral 'Six Seven' Meme and Mr. Beast's Show: [13:33 – 23:57]
• Lemon Party and Shock Site Segment: [30:17 – 37:35]
• Old Lady Porn and Changing Taboos: [37:37 – 40:14]
• Funeral and Crime Macabre: [41:08 – 44:45]
• Tranquilizer Drug Body Horror and "Mexican Tree Boys": [44:55 – 48:07]
• AI Blowjob Machines, Fleshlight Reviews: [48:13 – 53:00]
• NFL Talk, Bitter Gambling Reflections: [49:31 – 50:38]

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Tone and Style

• The tone is unfiltered, rowdy, and joyfully profane—exactly what’s expected from Big Jay and company.
• Morbid humor, self-deprecation, and inside banter are frequent.
• Social commentary is always undercut with existential shrugs and harsh, often comic honesty.

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For Listeners Who Missed the Show

Expect no boundaries and plenty of moments that will make you wince and laugh at the same time. Whether they're skewering the indignities of city life, probing the monsters of viral internet filth, or dissecting the weird pride of having strong calves, Jay, Louis, and Chris Stanley always keep it quick, crass, and darkly relatable.

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For More:

• Listen live Mondays–Thursdays at 5pm ET/2pm PT on SiriusXM Faction Talk 103.
• Follow the hosts and guests for more wild content and "30 rack weekends."

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End of Summary

Transcript

[Commercial Announcer]

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[Louis J. Gomez]

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[Christine]

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[Louis J. Gomez]

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[Big Jay Oakerson]

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[Louis J. Gomez]

Plus, with fan club, you'll save every time you go to the theater. Download the Fandango app and make movie night happen anytime, anywhere. And now, the bonfire with Big J. Okerson and Robert Kelly.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yo, fuck New York, you know.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Jesus, Lousus, I thought I was booked on the bonfire, not Eddie Trunk show. Yeah, it's a 45 minute long. It's this primus. What song?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Iron Maiden.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Oh, okay, got. Oh, Maiden.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

All right.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Raise the fist.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's the Maiden. Dude, I don't know if they have to catch any shrapnel for this.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Oh, God.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Maiden did nothing wrong. The Maiden didn't do anything wrong. You know, my calves are burning.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah, but they're ripped.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

They are ripped.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I mean, you're getting form, you know, as opposed to just.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You're not wrong. My calves are.

[Christine]

It's a good sign.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I don't know if you know this for real or if you're just poking fun right now, Chris, but I got pretty sick calves.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Oh, it came up on Ron and Fez many years ago.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Hang on. The people want to see.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Do they? Who's asking? I don't hear anyone ask.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's hard to get my jeans over.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I mean, because they're so, you know, swole. That's what the kids say. Look at that cut. Come on, you're geeked right now.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Take a peek.

[Christine]

Oh, I know.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Just get over and take a little shot, though.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Why not Just look at it. Yeah, caress it.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Let yourself get a little peek, dude. See what's going on.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Why not, you know, get off a little bit, you know, it's Christmas. That.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, dude.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Iron. Pure iron. Yeah, Maiden.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I wish. Yes, I do get it. I wish, man. Oh, I wish that my super strong calves weren't when this one's like the story. Like, what do you squat? I'm like, oh, my big fat body weight. My whole life.

[Louis J. Gomez]

My own weight. I'm a body weight workout guy.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, my legs. They're fucking shredded from dragging around this big, blubbery torso my entire life.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Don't say that, dude.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Come on. I'm sorry.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Come on. You gotta speak positive about yourself.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

By the way, since we last talked. Chris Stanley. Chris Stanley joining us today.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I mean, two times in a week. I mean, I unloaded the clip on Monday, so I don't know what I'm doing.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

The man, the myth, the legend is here yet again. We got him out twice. That is awesome. What the hell is I just going to say now?

[Louis J. Gomez]

Cavs. No, it seems like this is mostly be a cavs episode.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, we probably are going to talk mostly about calves.

[Louis J. Gomez]

It's mostly about calves. Body positivity. The serious XM Christmas party. You missed the first hour and 11 minutes of it. I, well, got three ones making out.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I got off the wrong exit or the wrong elevator.

[Louis J. Gomez]

That's like the wrong expressway. It's an exit.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I got off the wrong elevator floor and walked directly through. Of all days. Don't have my badge.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Of course not.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

So I got to get the thing. Then I get on 35 and actually ask a guy who's sweeping, thankfully, right by the door.

[Louis J. Gomez]

It's so sad, man.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Not at the party. I knocked, and he just opened it for me.

[Louis J. Gomez]

That's some Bob Cratchit shit right there.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Then I see, of course, the worst person has seen the situation. Jim McClure wondering why I'm at the party when I'm supposed to be on air five minutes.

[Louis J. Gomez]

You know, I've been hearing a lot of maiden on the channel right now.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Curious. Are you guys doing a maiden block? Are you guys getting the lead out over at the bonfire?

[Louis J. Gomez]

I was waiting for you on 36. I just saw you coming up the stairs.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I came up the stairs, dude. I saw everybody.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Good for the cavs.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I saw morale and Andy, who both wanted to give me another like, dude, thanks again for doing the. I'm like, yeah, yeah, yeah, dude. And then Jim McClure is like, what the. And I was like, yeah, I know there's a thing. And on the wrong elevator thing, it's the elevator's fault. So after all of my. I mean, shredded, burning calves from hauling ass in through the rainy city to get here from the Bobby Kelly's picked super far parking lot from here. Calves burning. Got off on the wrong floor. Had to Take stairs. One more floor, one more little kick in the nuts. And then to give you. It's the one of those days things. Sure. Christine was. She was party to it, Having to see what happens. We got in the hallway and we're like, all right, let's fly down the hallway to get here.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Sure.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

And there was people standing, like, to the right, walking really slow.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

So we stepped to the left, and then two of those people stepped to the left to continue walking slow.

[Louis J. Gomez]

That's good.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Just to block the path. And it's like, this has been my whole day, Jay.

[Louis J. Gomez]

It's a party, okay. It's a party in the halls, and it's with a bunch of people that I've never seen before. And that's always fun.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

The fury that builds, though, as you're. When people. Like when I was waiting to get into the elevator downstairs, you push the button, four elevator doors open. Of course, none of them are the ones that I'm getting in. And then you have to wait for a completely loaded elevator to get off where everyone's getting off with a real, like, ah, what a day. And you're like, move.

[Louis J. Gomez]

You know, J.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Get the fuck off the elevator.

[Louis J. Gomez]

They don't have elevators in Gaza. And all those radio shows start on.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Time because they have to live there.

[Louis J. Gomez]

You should live in 1221.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

They have to live there, man.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Not according to one state.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, fuck. I hate this place. New York City. You hate it, too, Jacob? You like when I get all like this?

[Christine]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

These people, it's the best.

[Louis J. Gomez]

What are you talking about? It's just a giant mass of people bothering you all of the time.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

All of the time.

[Louis J. Gomez]

All the time.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Non stop noise.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I've had experiences in bodegas and, like, small, like, stores in New York where I've like, well, I have to leave here now because everyone is crazy.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, yeah.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Just insane things happening to people who aren't tethered to reality.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I did that to. I did that to some DMV people out in Jersey.

[Louis J. Gomez]

A Jersey dmv.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I did a little. I got to get out of here before I start squirting lighter fluid over the glass.

[Louis J. Gomez]

What I would say. I would say what rivals the dmv, at least in major cities is. At least New York is the. The post office in New York City doesn't matter which one you go to. If it's in within the five boroughs, it's like fucking Thunderdome.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah.

[Louis J. Gomez]

And everyone's insane because what people have. The desperate and the needy are the only people who need to go to the fucking post office.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Black people who hate your white ass or Hispanic people who don't quite grasp the language yet. That's who you're dealing with at the post office most of the time. And the beautiful building though.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Oh God. God, it's gorgeous. I love seeing like an old post office. Just know it's the same shape, size, and it's the same fucking bulletproof glass.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

They also. Yeah, they also have a mailbox system. It didn't seem to expect, I don't know the population to grow by anything ever since the twenties.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Wow. That. That made more people gonna come to the country. So this is fine.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

How many mailboxes is town in queens need? 4. If we keep stacking them on top of each other.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Just build up. That's what I always say.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You think you want to get out?

[Louis J. Gomez]

Ever get out of New York?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah. Or the city.

[Louis J. Gomez]

At least I have. I have moments where it's like. Where I'm dealing with so many psychos. Where it's just like, I just. Why do I have to deal with this? Why is anything easy? Like if I go to the, like the pharmacy on Flatbush, it's just like everything is under lock and key. I'm like, I get it. Because people are desperate and they're stealing. I understand that. But it's just like, don't steal everything. Don't steal a toothbrushes. I want a toothbrush also.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You can't ever be the things. Like I don't even know if they keep those. Like, it's always like deodorant is locked up.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Oh yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Sometimes toothpaste and toothbrushes.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah, yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, yeah. Shampoo and conditioner for sure.

[Louis J. Gomez]

It started with. With like Tide, like larger detergent that was like og like Chip. People were stealing from.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah.

[Louis J. Gomez]

And it was like, why? Oh, they just need it and they resell it. That's it. There's nothing nefarious about it.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It was the genius move when I watched it. When I watched that dope sick love show years ago.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Is that like baddies?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's like baddies, but with more heroin.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Okay.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No, it was one of those HBO documentaries, okay. And I said this lady for a toothless junkie, ugly fucking just put of a lady.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I mean, don't comment on her looks.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

She was ugly as hell. And her teen runaway boyfriend Sebastian, she.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Was in her sea bass.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Sounds hot though. She was in her 40s. Whatever this lady is, it's her for sure right there. Her two scams I respected the shit out of.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Oh, yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Prostitution. Without prostitution. She would get in the car with you.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Okay.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Get you to a thing, and, you know, I guess you hopefully be selective of the guy. Like, you gotta get, like, a goofy white dude.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Sure. Someone's something to lose.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Someone's gonna scare them right away. And so she does is right away like. Well, I'm actually. She flashes some, like, weird, stupid sticker badge.

[Louis J. Gomez]

She'S carved into a piece of.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Soap and goes like. See if you can find that on YouTube. Dope sick love. Like, prostitution scam or something. But this was a.

[Louis J. Gomez]

This was a doc show.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Just one episode. One episode one documentary on hbo.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Okay.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Called Dope Sick Love. And I think it followed a few people. But the most memorable was these two because it's this fun. What you'd love to watch just to fly on the wall. They fight all day long. Like, everything you hate as a neighbor. But, like, want to see as you're walking down that street?

[Louis J. Gomez]

Oh, yeah, sure. Yeah. You want to have a taste of it. You don't want to live it.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You don't want to live it.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

So it's a lot of those, like, you know, him throwing her bag and everything she's ever owned in her life that's in that bag goes everywhere.

[Louis J. Gomez]

And then she's like, those are my things.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

And then I need them. It just shows them getting, like, aggressive with each other.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Sure.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

And then addicts do. And then just like. But it's funny. And then just cut to, like, a half hour later, there's on the train, like, head on out. Yeah. Just sleeping on each other's heads.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

But in the process, I think the guy's like, all right, babe, I'm going to go to work blowing guys in the subway. And then she would do.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Subway head.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

And she would do the prostitution scam where she'd say, I'm not gonna do this, actually. I'm a police officer, by the way. Tooth. So gross. Yeah, I'm a police officer. If you give out all the money you have in your wallet right now to the, you know, the women's abused women's thing, we'll let you go with a warning.

[Louis J. Gomez]

That's a good scam.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Here's the thing. It's a scam, though, that in that same situation, I would definitely fall for if I wasn't falling for it. I'm just giving her whatever to get her out of my life.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah, exactly. Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

And then. But that's always. Every one of those guys, three seconds after she leaves that car, and you're back on A main road, you go, oh, I just got robbed by a junkie prostitute, didn't I?

[Louis J. Gomez]

I guess they are smarter than me.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah. But the one that I thought was great was go outside the grocery store, wait. Look at receipts that people just throw out. Find one that has like detergent or something on it. Go back in the store. The problem with these people was their look. If they just did this with like, if they looked like a normal somewhat a civilian.

[Louis J. Gomez]

As I said, ye.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You could probably pull this off longer. The problem is you go there with like, you know, your cheeks are pierced.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah. And then you're like neck tattoos.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I'm returning these three things to tide.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah, they were no good.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah. It turns out I didn't need three things tied.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I need crack, I need to smoke.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It turns out what I need more of is crack cocaine.

[Louis J. Gomez]

What's going to get me high. Clean clothes or crack cocaine.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Do you. Speaking of Christine, why don't we take a peek what's going on in Kensington right now? It's rainy out. I wonder if it's raining.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Is there a live stream?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Oh, nice. That's great.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Kensington is the. That's the tranq place.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. What is tranq?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's something that skin from the outside. It's a down. It's a. It's. It's all opiate derived. I believe.

[Louis J. Gomez]

That's good. Oh, there it is. Oh, live stream.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

There's some hoes in there. Now this is. This is live feed.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Livery cab driver about to get scammed.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Live feed is. Let me see. It's. Yeah, it's like Cam 5 would be it Cam 7. One of those. A Cam 3.

[Louis J. Gomez]

There's a shame New York doesn't have a sort of cam like this. You know, we're really.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

There's gotta be.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I mean probably the Bronx or like east, East New York.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

The idea is to see people dying in real time.

[Louis J. Gomez]

It's stuff. This is the stuff cam is what this thing should be fucking.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I've definitely on this thing seen somebody dead before. But not like violence.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Oh yeah, of course.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Fentanyl.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah, yeah, that fent.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

But you also. See, that's the funniest man. When they bring fentanyl people back to life, they are never psyched about it. No.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Because guess what? They were high on fent before that. No, everything feels good.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

They're like, you were dead. He goes, well, whatever. I was, it was awesome.

[Christine]

Yeah.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I loved every second of it.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

And you have now ruined it.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I just fell asleep. What? So I'm not. I don't get to wake back up. Great. Now I have to find more fence.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

One of my favorite games on this is when people walk by. It's, are they joining the junkie circle or are they going to the Allegheny and Kensington Avenue train system?

[Louis J. Gomez]

Gilder Square Life Cam.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, I bet. I bet if you were able to zoom in, you'd really see some good robberies though, and stuff.

[Louis J. Gomez]

A Spider man or a spongebob or.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Flim Flam going on. They do like outside of college bars in some cities and stuff like that. Yeah.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Well, that's just. That's a cam then.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah. Just where things, like, pour out into the streets and they might be fights and stuff. Yeah.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Maybe people yelling, let's go. Or six, seven. I'm not sure. I'm not sure what the kids say. Ohio Skibidy.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Well, on the Kensington cam.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

On the Fully Loaded tour. It's crazy that we were just watching Kensington Cam on the bus one day.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Sure.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

One night. And Matt McCusker looks one of the guys on the screen. He goes, is that fucking Skrilla? He's like, that's fucking Skrilla. And it was really. Yeah.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Holy shit.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That was before. Like, he's a name now because of the six, seven thing. Oh, yeah.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Kids love six, seven, but no one.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Even knows what it is, I think, including the kids. And that's the joke.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Literally. Not. It's literally nonsense.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, that's why it's the joke.

[Louis J. Gomez]

It was like a song and then it was used in a LaMelo Ball hype video and that's what popped it off. LaMelo Ball of all kinds. Christ, he blows. I mean, he hit a three. He Dr.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

But pinpoint three point shooter for sure. But you know what? I don't like his weird. I don't like his weird skin tone.

[Louis J. Gomez]

The ball boys really fell off. Like that was a thing for a while. Like that. The crazy ass baldad.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

The bald that just went away.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah. Because the one he really jacked off over. I guess it's his own son, but he. That kid blew. Blew his knee out.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It was over. Well, he's a journeyman.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah, he literally is a journeyman basketball player.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That's what he is now he's on. He's on like, who knows, maybe the Pacers.

[Louis J. Gomez]

And he'll be on a different team by the end of the season.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Where's Lonzo Ball?

[Louis J. Gomez]

Is he replacing?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, Skrilla saved the guy from dying.

[Louis J. Gomez]

That's great.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That is great.

[Louis J. Gomez]

He's a Good man. Right There he is.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Just because he wears a mask. A mask all the time. And, oh, he saved a white junkie, too. That's a dummy.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Race relations.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Is that a dummy or is that a person?

[Louis J. Gomez]

You know what? Let's just give me an idea. Jay, you should go down to fucking Kensington and do a fake dropping. Yeah, stop dropping dummies around and then give them cpr. No, no, it's like, oh, we lost him. Like, you're an emt.

[Christine]

It wasn't cpr. I mean, I know he was trying to help. Did he really save his life? He's just going like this on his chest.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Well, I'd like to see if that person wakes up. It looks like a dummy. Yeah, that looks not real.

[Christine]

I mean, it's more than I would have done. I wouldn't have touched him.

[Louis J. Gomez]

That's terrible, Jacob.

[Christine]

But I'm just. Yes, I applaud him, but I don't know that he.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

If you saw a guy dead on the street, you wouldn't go over and see if you could, like, get his heart going again?

[Christine]

No. What are you. Are you crazy?

[Louis J. Gomez]

I saw. I saw a man passed out in a bus stop on Flatbush Avenue. And I didn't just stop. I mean, I didn't just walk by him. I went over. I pushed him with my foot.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Sure.

[Louis J. Gomez]

And then he moved. And I was like, okay, this is fine. Kept walking to the train station.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That's a hero.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Thank you. You know, it feels really good for you to say that. I appreciate.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

If you're asking me personally, I say it's heroics. You.

[Christine]

I'm. First of all, I'm not talking about some business. Somebody who's just walking down back.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

A crazy homeless person.

[Christine]

Yes. Who's.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No, no.

[Christine]

I like being eaten alive. Yeah, whatever they're taking.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No, I let them die.

[Louis J. Gomez]

No, they deserve life, too.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I kick him into the train tracks.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Or just get into the train tunnel.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Feed the rats, dude.

[Louis J. Gomez]

That's where you deserve to live. You should be a tunnel person.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Does he say play? Oh, maybe they blurred. It is why it looks fake. I don't know what's going on again.

[Christine]

Is that cpr?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah, it's cpr. Looks like he's putting something in his nose from the breeze.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Narcan, probably.

[Christine]

That is Narcan. Okay. He did save his life.

[Louis J. Gomez]

So Skrill is just, like, rubbing this dude's chest. It's not cpr. You're correct. He's just rubbing his chest where the heart should be.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, he's rubbing his heart Back to life.

[Louis J. Gomez]

He's a.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

They're trying to warm his heart with love.

[Louis J. Gomez]

It's a licensed massage therapist.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

All right, now that.

[Louis J. Gomez]

So he just. He just turned him over and he started jerking him off.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, my God. It is a guy.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Holy shit.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

He's moving.

[Louis J. Gomez]

That was a dude.

[Christine]

Man. That Narcan is magic.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's magic.

[Christine]

It's. It's. It's like the power of God. You're gone. And they.

[Louis J. Gomez]

If I were a surgeon, I would just have Narcan on me at all times, no matter what I'm doing.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Look at him. Kicking him towards the sidewalk more.

[Louis J. Gomez]

There you go. Get up, buddy. He's got him up.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That's the move. Let's get him up and moving.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Crash test dummy man's back up and running.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, I think that. I mean, he is dead there, because the way his body and head and everything's moving.

[Louis J. Gomez]

No, there's nothing. There's nothing moving. Like, it's just like. He's just pushing.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's like the shaking of just. Like a corpse.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah, it's a sloppy man right there. I'm glad he's. I'm sure he's still alive.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, he's probably still doing fine.

[Louis J. Gomez]

He's great.

[Sponsor Announcer]

He's crushing it.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

What if Skrill says he goes? Now, remember, son, Skrilla can't be everywhere all the time. Everybody gets one. Everybody gets their life saved once by Skrilla.

[Louis J. Gomez]

What a magical man.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Skrilla, I don't even. Yeah, he's like a weird. He's into, like, voodoo. Is this it? Turn it up. Turn up to 11. Rip the knob off.

[Louis J. Gomez]

That's it. He said it. He said it. He said the thing.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

So Skrilla, from what I understand, is a genuine dangerous individual. However, what is really funny now is because he's getting popular. He was at the Sixers game. See if you can find video on that. He went to the Sixers game the other night, I think, like, on Monday or so over the weekend.

[Louis J. Gomez]

As he should be. He's Philly dude.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, but they gave him, like, the seat. They gave him, like, the seats under the basket, and he. I think at one point they had to go over to him, be like, dude, you have to stop coming on the court. But he was coming on like. He was like. Like in the huddle.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I don't know. He's a fan. Let him fucking be.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It is full mask. Yeah, but you see the videos here. Him. Them holding guns.

[Louis J. Gomez]

And he should have his piece on him at the game.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Dude, he Wouldn't. He would not stop coming on the court. And they were really getting like, buddy, you can't keep doing this.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Speaking of six, seven. So Mr. Beast tweeted this out. What if I got 6767 of the biggest of the biggest memes together to compete for $676,000 and 700 767? That's really good. That's the shit you should be thinking of.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I really should think outside the box.

[Louis J. Gomez]

What if this was the 67 fire? What if you did that? You get so many fucking zoomers listening.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Did you. You watched Beast Games, I assume.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I watched the first episode and then I watched the last step.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That's it.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Just because I could. I couldn't do it. Because I don't know if you've read this thing of, like, Netflix makes shows that they produce change the script so that the characters say out loud what they're doing. So everyone. So. So that. Because they. Netflix realized most people are watching shows on their phones.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Right.

[Louis J. Gomez]

So that Beast Games, which was on prime, that was incredibly difficult to watch because I'm watching it. I'm not on my phone. I'm watching. I hate watching this thing. And it's just Mr. Beast, who has zero charisma, is just a creep. Just, like, audibly narrating everything everyone's doing.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Absolutely. It was creepy, that regard. And also, like, I do think he sucks because it's like the money thing he's doing is. And by the way, the same way you lose respect for someone when you play on someone's like, you know, it's funny to get people to do something podcast or something. You go, hey, for 300, like, you know, punch yourself in the nuts and. Yes. And paint the word like, you know, queef across your face and walk around and do it. And when someone does it, you're like, damn, man.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Oh, I've hurt humanity in general.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

So it's the same thing with that. It's like, hey, will you just the optics. And everyone gets it. Like, are you going to burn this fucking stranger? That two days ago you were crying as your newest best friend.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

And you're fucking him over two days later. Do I really think that's, like, unscrupulous? Like, not really.

[Louis J. Gomez]

No.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's just, though it's not even that those things aren't that, like, heavy stakes for me.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's for me, it's the guy at the top that I don't like is the tinkering of that guy being like, that's right. Hurt each other for me. And then he's like. And then it's coming and goes like, now you can do it. I mean, it's not far from the baddies in the sense of like, like, hey, for 500, punch that in the face.

[Louis J. Gomez]

It's pure human manipulation. Yeah, it's evil.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

And he's.

[Louis J. Gomez]

And he's. And he's used the algorithm and his autistic skills to perfect it.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

At least the baddies are just keeping it to some ghetto households. In myself.

[Louis J. Gomez]

No, that's more pure, to be totally honest. Whereas, yeah, desperate people showed up to Beast Games. They all sat in a square, like a thousand of them as he dropped them.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, you're out. You're out.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah, by random chance, you're out. Sorry, you don't get. Whatever the prize was $5 million. I can't remember. He has unlimited money.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I mean, there was. The funny things in it were. The one guy just fighting so hard, desperately. He's like, let me do that. One of them was like, how long can you hang from a bar?

[Louis J. Gomez]

Mm, brilliant idea.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I know. But they just go. And this guy was like, dude, I got this. I for sure got it. And he was just so terrible at it. He like fell almost immediately.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Did you watch the. The final episode? Did you watch the finale? What I find funny is so the final. What was the final competition? They had to like try to spin a wheel with like.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

All I remember is. And I can't remember if he won or didn't win.

[Louis J. Gomez]

The white haired guy.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Okay, so it was the guy who says if he wins he was going to use the money to cure his son's.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah. What? Where? In fucking Barbados, dog. Like that kid ain't getting fucking cured by.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

But there is no cure.

[Louis J. Gomez]

No.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

He thinks with his winnings from Beast Games.

[Sponsor Announcer]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

He's going to. He thinks that somehow under a million dollars has been put into taxes. Has been put into this research.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah. This kid, this fucking dude with this terribly sick child.

[Christine]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Here's a disease they have a name for, but no one's ever looked into it. If we only had, I don't know, a million dollars.

[Louis J. Gomez]

That's how few people have this shitty disease. And this guy's like sucking off Mr. Beast Jimmy for fucking crying.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

He's like, I just want to help my. And by the way, whatever his son has, you ain't fixing his son. It's a thing that makes you, like, it's a forever thing. It's like your face is different and your eyes are a little. Not where they're supposed to be.

[Louis J. Gomez]

It's totally wrecked.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Kid's gone.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah, he is.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

What? He is. He's saying the cure for down the road. He goes, it's not what the fuck you're gonna use that money for. You had to find a reason. You can't. You gotta find a reason to say like, you need this money for this kid who definitely not curable.

[Louis J. Gomez]

No, no, the kid is. Got a bad fucking roll of dice.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

What if he goes, no, there was not so much a cure, but we were able to surgically have his eyes put closer together.

[Louis J. Gomez]

And I think our new giant house actually helps him a lot too.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I notice wherever his eyes are, he's really been enjoying the yard.

[Louis J. Gomez]

We've given a lot of the money to fanduel.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

But also anytime you turn on that guy, I mean, that's just a shitty part of the show in general right there. Because some people are like, oh man, I just want to live a great life. You know what I mean? I want to give my like, you know, my kids an amazing life.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah, but they need it yard, right?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's like that kind of thing. And then when someone comes in, such a dick move where it's like, will you fuck over this guy? It's like, well, he's got the eyes far apart, kid.

[Louis J. Gomez]

If I was on that Beast games, I would have definitely fucked that guy.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

First one you fuck over.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Oh yeah, because you know, you don't want that guy going to the end.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I agree. It's the same feeling I have chess. It's the same carpet pull someone tries to do in and it didn't have. Doesn't happen so much anymore. And if they do, it's not mean spirited. But sometimes when I would do crowd work, you'd ask something, you know, you'd be like, hey, nice outfit. What, did your mom pick that out for you? Something like that. It's like, my mom's dead or whatever, you know, I mean, that kind of thing. Or it's like. Or you have some questions like, my mom's dead. And it's like, oh, you're trying to pull the fucking brakes.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

And that's how I feel about that guy. Guy. He's putting an immediate like a break pole in there. We're like, well, before you think of getting rid of this just stupid guy who's competing in the same dumb game you are with creepy White, I have to think about him using the money to cure other wide eyed kids.

[Louis J. Gomez]

But you know what? In my head I'm like, this Is the Beast games.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

All right?

[Louis J. Gomez]

They don't want. Well, the editors. The editors and producers want that guy to go far.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You know what I mean?

[Louis J. Gomez]

Because, like, oh, yeah, this sob story is gonna be great for our views.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No, Right. That's what I'm saying. But that's my emotion on the thing.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Is when someone goes, oh, my mom actually died. I go, good. I'm not. You're not gonna pull the brakes on me, fuckface.

[Louis J. Gomez]

She doesn't have to see this crowd work.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You know, I didn't do. You know, I didn't know that. And you're just trying to pull the brakes on the thing. And that's this guy's move he's making. You have to think twice for a fictitious cause.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I'd say this is not real.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Dude, you can't fix your son. He's fine like he is. Love him like that.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah, that's good. That's good. Yeah, that's one way to just rationalize it.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah. Love him the way he is. Don't say, I'm gonna fix other kids so other dads don't have to deal with this kid who can't catch a football ever.

[Louis J. Gomez]

They cut to like a talking head segment where you have to talk about, like, look, I think this guy's kids living his best life.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I'm not sure, like, you know, this is gonna help anything.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Never seen this motherfucker not smiling.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Like, he seems like a sociopath.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

This kid dances at fucking everything, man.

[Sponsor Announcer]

Dancing.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, man. I'd like to see some pictures of him maybe pop up on my R frame.

[Commercial Announcer]

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[Sponsor Announcer]

The show is sponsored by BetterHelp. It's coming. The days are getting darker and longer. It's getting colder. And the holidays are here. Balancing family and travel and gifts and where you're going and who you're doing it with. It's easy to forget about yourself in the middle of all this chaos. We always forget to take care of ourselves because we're worried about everybody and everything else. That's why BetterHelp is encouraging you to rewrite traditions this season by making time for yourself. Incorporating therapy into your new existing traditions can help you slow down and take care of yourself during what can be a joyful but sometimes hectic, lonely time of year. And that's what you want. You want to enjoy it. The holiday looks different for everyone. Maybe it's baking your Great aunt sweet potato pie or starting something new like a quiet night with friends. Therapy can be one of those new traditions, too. Better Help gives you space to pause, reflect and feel more grounded. They match you with a licensed therapist based on your goals and preferences. And if it's not the right fit, you can switch anytime. With over 30,000 therapists and more than 5 million people served, BetterHelp helps people close the year with clarity instead of chaos. This December, start a new tradition by taking care of you. Our listeners get 10% [e-mail] bonfire. That's B E T T E R h e l p.com bonfire.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You know the holidays are here and with them comes all the cheer and the spending. I think we've all felt the pressure of finding the perfect gift for the perfect price.

[Sponsor Announcer]

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[Big Jay Oakerson]

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[Louis J. Gomez]

Ones out to everyone I know.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

What's a Lemon Party?

[Louis J. Gomez]

Think about it.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Is that where you should. I make guesses.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Did you really not know what Lemon Party is? Christine, please bring up Lemon Parties. Do you guys not know what Lemon Party is?

[Christine]

I do.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Come on.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

What is it? DJ Lou, you crazy?

[Louis J. Gomez]

Do you know what goats he is the guy spreading his open. It's in that same vein. Tub Girl. Why do I need this? I know. I feel like the outside.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You shouldn't. Please fill me in, Sensei.

[Louis J. Gomez]

It's old school.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

These are all things I love.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Is it porn?

[Commercial Announcer]

It's.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yes, it's pornography. It's a single. It's a single frame picture. Just one picture. I'll just say it. It' three older men having a threesome.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Okay. No. You're gay. Get away from me. Stop that.

[Louis J. Gomez]

You know, I don't.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

They're here, they're queer, and they're not going anywhere.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I don't want to dime out your staff as Christine's looking for 11 party, but one of your producers said check out all the hotties on 35. I'm not saying which one.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Really?

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah. That's an HR violation.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That is a major HR violation. Christine. That's not how you.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Everyone is equally attractive at SiriusXM.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Lemon party.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Just do a Google image. It's not on porno. I really derailed this bad.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It was before.

[Sponsor Announcer]

It was before the time of pornhub.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Right?

[Louis J. Gomez]

Oh, much.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I remember the blue waffle.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Now, see, I don't know what blue waffle is.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That was either a disgusting cooch or I don't quite remember exactly. It might have been both. It might have been the area between.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Ooh, Taint.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Maybe.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah, there it is. Three to the right. There you go.

[Christine]

That one.

[Louis J. Gomez]

That's Lemon party.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

All right.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Three like guys in their 60s. One guy's making out with a dude laying down and then there's another older man giving oral pleasure.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

But the guy. But the guy. The guy leaning over for the deep, passionate turn a frog into a prince kiss is an old Asian fella.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's interracial.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I say what? The guy. The guy laying down's got a thicky, if I'm being completely honest.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Oh, it's nice.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Christine, can you click over the one where the old man's licking the other man's asshole?

[Louis J. Gomez]

Are there other frames for this? I really thought. To think.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, that one right there. If you could see what that brings us to. Okay. Oh, there's a video of this. Jacob. Jacob.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I'm so sick of the Jacob.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

This is your Christmas bonus.

[Christine]

I'm pretty sure you're right.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Well, we're watching an ad that's saying AI porn is here.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

This is your bonus this year. Yeah, I know. SiriusXM's not giving you bonuses this year because they have to. They have to recoup. Call her daddy money.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Awkward. Or hot.

[Christine]

Still wearing the Johnny because he's paying.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

A lot of attention to the top. He knows what the guy likes.

[Louis J. Gomez]

So for some reason.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh. He sucked his foreskin over his helmet. Ah, me running.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah. For some reason. Searching. Lemon party also brings up just, you.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Know, God is a black person. You're gonna walk in and see this. Oh, there you go, Black Lou. I didn't want to look at this. I didn't want to see this. Black Lou.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah, you asked.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I just asked what it was.

[Christine]

Maybe give a little more detail. What are we seeing right now?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, there's one old man up with his legs completely up. He's wearing some Adidas socks. They're over the. They're over the ankle, but they're not calf length. Anyway, he's getting his asshole sucked.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I guess there's rimming.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

There's man on man reming by an old. Another old man.

[Christine]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's not what you picture. It's not what you pictured mature gentleman doing.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Now there's three. Hold on one second.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Guy, I need you.

[Louis J. Gomez]

So we're watching older gay porn.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah.

[Louis J. Gomez]

And now rewind it about 20 seconds because it cuts to, I guess the cuck or the director. And it cuts the black and white. And it's just a dude in a polo.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's an artistic choice.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Smiling at the men making love.

[Sponsor Announcer]

Take that.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

He's also wearing, if I might say, those. What we call those steampunk glasses where they.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I would say it's Guy Fieri glasses, but that's baseball outfielder.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It looks like it has like the. The, you know, the leather that connects.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Almost like driving glasses.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah.

[Christine]

What do you think the median age of these gentlemen are?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Well, this guy's 16. This guy.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Should we be watching this?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

This guy's bringing it down for sure. Yeah, this guy's coming in. This guy's coming in late 40s, probably around my age.

[Louis J. Gomez]

The cuck slash director is probably around. Yeah, 40s, maybe 50.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Maybe 50. And then. And the other two gentlemen are definitely late 60s, early 70s, yet.

[Sponsor Announcer]

Still hard.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Still hard. And I gotta be honest with you, dicks look young as I've ever seen.

[Louis J. Gomez]

See, dick don't age.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Dick don't age. DDA. I mean, look how old that man's body is. But look how youthful his dick is in that other guy's mouth.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Oh, a younger guy is going at it.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That's a beautiful. Jacob. Can you at least acknowledge that?

[Christine]

That he's got a nice cock?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Thank you.

[Louis J. Gomez]

There we go. He said he finally got out.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Just so everyone knows that you're not homophobic. That guy's got a beautiful penis for an older gentleman, doesn't he?

[Christine]

Yeah, it's pretty smooth for a wrinkly fella.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Exactly. That guy now has an ugly penis. I don't like that guy's penis at all.

[Louis J. Gomez]

It disgusts me.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

The French. Oh, Three way.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Christine, don't kink. Shame. All right. Older people need to enjoy sex too.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Spring break kiss.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah, we're all gonna be this age someday, God willing.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

All right.

[Louis J. Gomez]

And we're all gonna want to have three way sex with other older men.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I do hope that's the case. I hope I really get in the bathhouse life when I'm older.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I think you will.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah. Relaxing. Yeah, I'm just gonna go. Hey, guy. I can be your otter or your bear, depending on how I shave my chest or not.

[Louis J. Gomez]

So let me know. I'll come back tomorrow.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

How do you guys want. You guys want me otter or bear?

[Christine]

This is Harry White back.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Look at this tummy hanging down. There's nothing wrong.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, okay, now we're judging.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Thank you.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

The guy drops his guard, agrees to be filmed getting on all fours, where gravity's gonna do what it do.

[Louis J. Gomez]

It's actually, no, I've already brought this up, but it really is evil. The AI porn stuff. Because the porn, the porn. The commercials used to be like, meet an old lady. Now it's just like, don't even bother meeting people. Just masturbate at home.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, by the way, the craziest question that I ever get asked by porn commercials, constantly, tired of masturbating alone? No. Yeah, no, no. I've always done it that way. That's the way I'd like to do it.

[Louis J. Gomez]

You don't like to masturbate in a room full of friends?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, that's what's the question there. That's what he's asking now. Would I rather be. Than masturbating? Yes, sometimes, probably.

[Louis J. Gomez]

But then that's also followed by like, it's mad libs of. Find ugly. Like literally. This isn't even a joke. Find ugly women in your neighborhood.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, women over 60 are looking for you.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah. Find older women in your neighborhood.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

By the way they say, sexy voice that goes, if you can get past the smell, there's 65 year old women waiting for you.

[Louis J. Gomez]

But imagine you live in that neighborhood where all the 65 year old women are trolling for dick on Pornhub.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, like the pervert park of old ladies.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah, exactly.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I like that.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Like, I live in town.

[Christine]

These guys are actually Eiffel towering, but they're talking. Can I hear what these.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I'd like to hear. Yeah, what they're saying, please.

[Christine]

Eiffel towering.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

A guy was former UFC legend.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Probably talking about 401ks and like, you know, investment opportunities.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Buy, sell.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Oh, my house has gone up so much. I'm a boomer.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Sugar's up, but I gotta not have sugar.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Oh, Christ.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah. What's the conversation about? Can I tell you the gayest thing about this? Even though I'm watching men with their dicks in each other, is calling another man baby. I don't know why that struck me as the gay. Hey, pal.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah, you like this?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, is that too much, guy? Yeah.

[Louis J. Gomez]

What's up, bud? You want more?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, you need more spit guy.

[Christine]

God, imagine that. Somebody's grandpa.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I'm good.

[Christine]

Imagine that to your grandpa.

[Louis J. Gomez]

So what I'd be like, hey, my grandpa's getting it.

[Christine]

Hey, grandpa.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Or giving it, whatever.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

If this is. Let me tell you something. You get super upset about it being your mom. You immediately get way less upset about it being your grandma. You're like, get after grandma.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Look, you're on death's door.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Anyway, get after. That's always the thing. All the porn stars I met on SDR show that have grandkids. Kids, they don't. A lot of them don't see their grandkids. It's not because the grandkids don't want to see them. It's the people don't want the kids to see the grand. You know, I mean, it's like, it's the middle part there.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Grandkids probably wouldn't give a. By the time the grandkids get old enough the way it's like Jennifer Lawrence's career is still going totally strong after we've all seen load all over her face.

[Louis J. Gomez]

So much love.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Like, everyone gets, oh, you get over that quick now.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah, but, yeah, but the parents. It's just like, it's like a. Almost a sci fi mover. It's where. Oh, good God, no. I've been masturbating to what this entire time? You have to try to change the timeline. It's like, no, I have to go back. Would you go back and kill Hitler? No, I'll go back and make sure my, my mom's mom doesn't do porn so I don't feel bad about myself from masturbating to her.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah. It is funny when we've done a few, we interviewed a few of like the old lady things and they're like, how about the families? And they're always like, oh, it's, you know, they're not, they're not with it just yet.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Holidays are nice.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Or they're always as comfortable. Like, it's like, oh, my one daughter thinks it's the greatest thing in the world. My son hasn't talked to me for 10 years and I have three grandchildren that I'm get over.

[Louis J. Gomez]

It's a job. It's a job. It's 20, 25.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I think it's age is everything. If my mom made a conscious decision now, my step pop was like, yeah, I think it's great. And my mom was out there just getting plowed out on video.

[Louis J. Gomez]

She's in the top 3% of only fans.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's. But the embarrassment goes away because she's going to do old lady porn. Yeah, it's not gonna. No one's gonna be like, your mom's not that hot of a porn star. That was never the move.

[Louis J. Gomez]

That's good because it's so niche. Like, you'd be mad if some people might be mad if, like, oh, they're just full on sex. But if it's just, just like feet porn, it's like, that's fine. I think more people be fine with that of just, you know, dude simping for feet as opposed to just, you know, genital sex.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Which is funny because it's all still whacking off and weirdos. And I think someone who can finish to feet is weirder than someone that wants to Jerk off to my mom.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Oh, they're webbed. This is perfect for me.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

The only reason I would choose feet over my mom is because it's my mom. But I would rather jerk off. And Jacob takes this compliment to your mother for sure, which is sweet. Don't tell her that. Unless that's her personality. Then do tell her that. Whatever's going to make the holidays nice.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Everyone wants a nice holiday.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I'd say save it for the third day of Hanukkah. When does Hanukkah start this year, Jacob?

[Louis J. Gomez]

I think, like tomorrow.

[Christine]

Earlier. I don't remember.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I thought it was December 21st.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Christine said the 21st. And then they said I was a piece of Jew for not knowing. But you're more Jewish than me. Even you don't know.

[Christine]

Oh, wait, no, I lied.

[Louis J. Gomez]

It's the 14th.

[Christine]

Yeah, I knew it was earlier.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I found out I'm 20% Jewish a few years ago.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That's not true.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I swear to God. I'll show you the 20% Ashkenazi Jew.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Ashkanazi.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Ashkanazi. Daddy.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Who's. Whose side?

[Louis J. Gomez]

I think my mom's. I'm not sure. Everyone's gone. So you couldn't crowd work me by my parents, but.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Well, your mom's in. But your mom's in. In Queens, right? Dead. No, no, but she was in Queen. You grew up Queen.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Lived her entire life in Queens, York.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, you're gonna. I mean, anyone. Anyone you there is gonna have a little bit of Jewish in him if you don't go straight up Hispanic.

[Louis J. Gomez]

My dad looked Hispanic, but he wasn't, oddly enough.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

He looked Hispanic.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Oh, yeah. He had dark skin.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah. I mean, well, Louis J. Gomez's father has one of the funniest pictures in the world. Looks like Eazy.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Oh, really?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's crazy. He's got like a Jheri curl and an LA Kings head on and sunglasses. What I remember had aids. He had aids, but he beat his. Also won a turf war with Dr. Dre. Easy is always. Is that Louis? Yeah. Yeah, there you go. Yeah. He looks like a starting Puerto Ricans with attitude.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I remember that band. They were great.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

He looks like Lewis's dad. Looks like a Puerto Rican small forward, doesn't he? He looks like a.

[Louis J. Gomez]

He looks like Grimes.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Fresh and a Baylor. Fresh and a Baylor. Lewis is dead. Yeah, I guess that was before he got stabbed.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I think after.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Unless it. Well, it could be one of those Puerto Rican funerals. Well, you ever see those Hispanic funerals where they like stuff or embalm the body and have them hang at the funeral.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Really?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Christine, bring up those. Those are the best. Remember those, Jacob? Yeah, they pose them up in Puerto Rico.

[Christine]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No, it's just like Latino people here. I just lumped them all in as Mexicans or Puerto Ricans, depending where we were started at. So probably Mexicans.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Okay. All right.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

But you know, Puerto Ricans.

[Christine]

Either or. I feel like they wanted this to land harder than it did.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

This idea.

[Christine]

Yes. Didn't take off.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's just a corpse.

[Christine]

Corpses.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I'm loving the transitions.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

His favorite Celtics jersey. Oh, dog.

[Louis J. Gomez]

This makes Italians look terrible with this. They only have like, wacky reads. Yeah, this is. This is true. This is true. Respect for the dead.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Look at this. Your mom with a bush. Light a cigar and a. Playing. Here's. This one's playing video games and eating Doritos. Wait a second. This isn't a white person who does this business. Okay. All right. That blew my mind a little bit.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I mean, t. Human taxidermy.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Look, they set up one guy as a boxer. Yeah.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Cuz the man loved to fight.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

What if he was just a fan of fighting?

[Sponsor Announcer]

Nope.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

He loved the fight. Yeah, I hope so. I saw a body cam video not long ago where the cops end up having to shoot the guy in the house. And then. And they're over.

[Louis J. Gomez]

That's out of the ordinary.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah. And they have to go. They go over and they go, damn. You know, that is. Dude. Strongest hands I've ever seen. Golden gloves champion. So and so they just shot him dead.

[Louis J. Gomez]

They identified him when he whacked them.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

The cop just goes, oh, did you guys know that is. He's like. He's like. Because he's like. I mean, it was a point where he's like gurgling, dying.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Oh, God.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

And they go, wow. You know, that is. That guy was one of the fastest hands I've ever seen. Toughest guys ever. Damn, he was good. He was so good.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Not that fast.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Not that fast. Well, he did. In defense of the cops here. Which I never say out loud. Loud. In defense of the cops. In this one, the guy brandished. It was scissors or something. But he kept saying he had a gun. And he like, he. I think he was trying to do suicide.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Pull it, dog. I mean, come on. I mean, for the. The gun or the knife or the scissors.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Scissors. By me. I think he did it like, he was just. He was. He said he has a gun. Back up. And then he pulled out what he said was a gun. So they. And I. Listen, I still stand by. Shouldn't Cops be trained enough to, like, every movie cop I've ever seen has been like, I could hit you, and then if I fire two shots, one of them's hitting you knee.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I think I should just speed.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, I think just shoot enough that direction.

[Louis J. Gomez]

It's just.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Listen, my instincts would probably be. If a guy was like, I have a gun put on you, my instinct would be point straight for sure. Definitely wouldn't be like, well, let me put one in his thigh and see what happens.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I'm gonna drop this dude but not kill him.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That's our dream, though, isn't it?

[Louis J. Gomez]

Oh, yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Don't you want to shoot somebody in both thighs? I mean, what's. What's gonna happen while you're giving them a speech where you're doing a lot of talking with the gun at them.

[Louis J. Gomez]

And they're gonna give him a skrill a massage afterwards?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I don't mind that. Bring them back to life. Then I'm gonna OD him on tranq. You've seen what tranq does to the body, right?

[Louis J. Gomez]

It like, it like, it's like gangrene, correct? Like, it's like. Yeah, it's very awful.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It must feel great. You want to try it once, though, and see what all the hubbub's about?

[Christine]

I think Jacob's so good that my. My arm starts falling off.

[Louis J. Gomez]

No, you're not even gonna give a.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

If that's gone, Jacob. It's not gonna happen the first time, you nerd. Damn, dude. You hate fun.

[Louis J. Gomez]

First time's the first. The best time. So why don't do everything once?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Do it the once. You're always chasing that. You're never going to find it again.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Exactly.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

So if you just know one time, like, oh, it's like, act like you're like, in another country going on a roller coaster that you're never coming back to.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like a roller coaster exactly like that.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Jacob, the promise. You're not thinking. You're not thinking about, like, it's a roller coaster.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I feel like, like, Jacob only cares about hotties on the 30th, 35th floor and not getting high.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Damn, dude.

[Christine]

Was it me?

[Louis J. Gomez]

I don't know. I'm not even saying I don't know.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

But I think you're super into the hotties on the 30, 35.

[Louis J. Gomez]

That sounds like a bad corporate porn.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You want to go mingle, Jacob? Go downstairs and hit on somebody and let Black Lou film you.

[Christine]

Thanks.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Why hit on a guy?

[Christine]

No, no, I don't want to go down to 35 now, Mike, you want.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

To hit on a guy?

[Christine]

I don't want to party too hardy.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Is it because you're homophobic?

[Christine]

Big gyms down there I don't want to run into.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Oh, good God. You're up shit's creek.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You're way up shit's creek.

[Christine]

I do not.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Chris, Stanley didn't want to go to the party because he said what there is nice is a direct quote. Too many Japs.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I did not say that. That wasn't me.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Say he doesn't trust the Japs.

[Louis J. Gomez]

No, wait.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Ever since he got some bad sushi.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I didn't know anyone down there. It was very confusing.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, God.

[Louis J. Gomez]

And isolating.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That's what trank does. It turns you into those tree kids from Mexico.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I mean, looking at pictures of tranqu.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

What would you rather do? Would you rather. Would you rather have to lose.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Okay.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Part of your skin or your body to tranq wounds? Or be a Mexican tree boy?

[Louis J. Gomez]

Give me the trees dog.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You rather be a Mexican tree boy?

[Christine]

Better.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Better weather than Kensington.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Did you ever see when they try to fix the Mexican tree boys? It's not a good job, but I.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Find a better doctor. I hope.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I think SiriusXM insurance covers detring your body, right?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

If I. If I saw a Mexican tree boy, you know what I would do? I would take a flathead screwdriver and I would carve Chris and J forever.

[Louis J. Gomez]

With a heart within a heart within the heart.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

And if he's not screaming too bad at that moment, I'll also add a little. The arrow.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Oh, yeah, you have to.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I'll chisel in the arrow, give him.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Some fent, and then carve it in.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, that's the move.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Or tran, I guess.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Whatever.

[Christine]

Tree people. What is that thing that's wrong with their hand? Why do they have a tree hand?

[Louis J. Gomez]

Warts. Be inclusive. There's nothing wrong with.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

With them. Yeah, there's nothing wrong. I'll have it that. Let's. Let's be honest there. The one kid with the. He's got trigoatee. And that doesn't. Not work a little bit. It's kind of cool. It looks like cyberpunk.

[Louis J. Gomez]

She kind of looks like an island boy. She's a girl.

[Christine]

You're literally turning into treebeard.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I know. Imagine trying to whack off with tree hands. Oh, my God.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Oh, I decided to masturbate this month and my penis is ravaged again.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Well, once again, my piece. You have to sand your hand down so you can whack off with God Knows what? Oh, no. That a tree person. Yeah, a person with tree hands is the perfect customer for the suckingator 2000, whatever that thing is that we've given away on Legion of Skanks a few times.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I gave away that once in high society.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, yeah. The Suckinator 2000.

[Commercial Announcer]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It looks like. I said it looks like a humidifier.

[Sponsor Announcer]

It's too big.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah, it's ridiculous. It's a giant device to give you a fucking. A blow job.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's this big. What you have to do and sit there to let it do. I feel silly. I couldn't get into a mode that I'm gonna come. You have to get into a mode. You have to stop thinking about the fact that you're jerking off and how silly you look to get there. How would you ever not feel when there's a. A, A Betamax tape on your dick going. A squawk?

[Louis J. Gomez]

You think it's the sound that the engineers have to work on dropping the. The loudness of them, of the mechanisms within.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

We gotta get this thing quiet.

[Louis J. Gomez]

See, I think you could get to the point where you can like, you know, get hard to bang the machine, but it's afterwards. After you nut. Yeah, that's. It's like, oh, no, what did I do?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I know when they tell you things like, oh, it's dishwasher safe. Like, I'm not putting that with my.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Well, I guess I'll. The dishwasher.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, yeah. Oh, why don't I get some. Come all over my sick ass. Plastic Eagles cups. Oh, that's a good idea.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Also, I'm sorry about dropping the jinx on the Eagles on Monday. I said it was a lock minus.

[Christine]

Two and a half.

[Louis J. Gomez]

But Jalen Hurts did hit for prize picks, so, yeah, 100 yards. It was over six. Six and a half.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

And what was. No A.J. brown. I thought you said A.J.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Brown. Sorry.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, A.J.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Brown over. He was 100 yards on you.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You know, imagine all the yards he would have had if he caught those two passes.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Let's not. Let's not even talk about that part.

[Christine]

Chris, didn't you say you had. What was the term? 30 locks or 30?

[Louis J. Gomez]

All right, listen, Jacob, I don't need you jumping in on my. No, it was a 30 rack weekend. 30 rack for Locktown. You can follow Bennington SXM on Instagram every Saturday lockdown and every other day of the week. Fantastic Bennington content. But it's gonna be another 30 rack weekend. 30 locks this past weekend, Jay, I mistreated 21. I can't I can't count. So it was actually 32 bets. I gave out 22 and 10.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

22 and 10.

[Louis J. Gomez]

That's like 70 against us.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That's fantastic numbers. If you threw all your money into that, Jacob, you'd be a wealthy man right now.

[Louis J. Gomez]

You would have unlimited money.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You did. Bottomless money forever. You can get a guest. You can just get yourself a little chalet and feet Gigi.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Oh, my God. You'd be on the lead express.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Whenever you want, you can go golf at Kevin Hart's Golf Island.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Oh, my God. Yes. And the pedophilia there is out of control.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, I bet it's crazy. Out of control.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Kevin Hart released the ledgers, and unlike Epstein, interracial man.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Could you imagine if Kev. I mean, he got famous in a time where he definitely could have been on Epstein Island.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Oh, 100.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I hope not.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I mean, God, no, it's. It's bad. I'm saying this is bad.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I'm saying, would it be. The funny thing is, like, if the six degrees of Kevin Bacon is like, I'm also on the ledger because Kev did take me once. I just talked about. All right. I did go on a kid excursion with Kevin Hart one time when he first popped. That's it. He called me up, he was like, you want to go to this thing? This guy's got a cool island.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Everything was so new at the time.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

And then I got there, and he was like, no, it is. It's actually legal here. And then I was like, one in Rome. One in Rome or whatever.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah, that's it.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

And then Goolie Gulie Maxwell made pastry puffs.

[Louis J. Gomez]

That's my Roman Empire, I guess. Pedophilia Island.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Christine, get this very reasonably sized thumbtack of a suckingator off the screen. Screen. What I'm talking about looked like a old VCR rewind.

[Louis J. Gomez]

It was a box.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's a box. It's so big.

[Louis J. Gomez]

It's like. Also, like, there's the. The engineer. An engineer has to design it, right? This guy, like, right? Draws up designs.

[Sponsor Announcer]

Yeah.

[Louis J. Gomez]

And that. This is what he's spending his mental energy on. What can I get to suck me off?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Okay, I'm not talking about one from the early 60s. Christine.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Middle ground.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Not when you attached to a power drive drill like this. What was the company.

[Louis J. Gomez]

No, it was.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Remember, it was like one's called the Milker. I just saw that. That's not. That doesn't sound good.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Get milked. I would. I would. I would.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Google.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Large blowjob machine.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yes. Blow job machine. Dick sucking machine. Christine, what are you, a child?

[Louis J. Gomez]

It makes Fleshlights look antiquated.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It does? Yeah.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I think it's second row, three to the three.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I agree. That's what I think it is, too. The Auto Blow. Auto blow. That's it.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Yeah, that's exactly it. The aut Blow.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, it's a room humidifier.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Is that to like, store your.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

By the way, that's no cleanup needed.

[Louis J. Gomez]

We just saved the come. It's a breeding machine.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's the world's best selling blow job machine.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I doubt that.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

If I was looking down on that and I was like, what? I have a box fan on my dick. What's happening? It looks like one of those individual room air conditioners.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Oh, yeah, I got one of those. They're fantastic.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, I have zone he hand jobs and blow jobs. I don't know. The Fleshlight has sponsored a bunch of things I've done. I've been in possession of three or four flashlights.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Were they the generic flashlight or were they modeled after ladies?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I think one was Elisa Ann.

[Louis J. Gomez]

Nice.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

We had a Lisa and we had a couple, like, at least two of, like, the people. And then I think two randoms.

[Louis J. Gomez]

And so their vaginas have ridges and, like corkscrews inside.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I guess so, yeah. And little knurls. I would describe them as neurals and I'd probably get cheap checked. I mean, once the mold's made, get those checked, ribbed for his pleasure, they feel fantastic. Hey, are you loving Chris Stanley here? I do. Well, you can listen to him on Bennington here on Faction Talk weekdays noon to two at High Society Radio. Also on the Gas Digital Network and YouTube.

[Louis J. Gomez]

And can I just throw out a birthday shout out to Ron Bennington today? Not today, later on in the month, but birthday shout out to Ron Bennington.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Sagittarius, I think.

[Louis J. Gomez]

No, it's not Taurus.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I want to be saggies with them.

[Louis J. Gomez]

I'm bad at astronomy.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I want to be saggies with astrology. B. I'm gonna be at the improv in Irvine December 18th through the 20th. The Milwaukee Improv New Year's Eve through January 3rd. For tickets and all my tour dates, go to bigj comedy.com our holiday spectacular. I don't know if it's sold out yet. Tuesday, December 16, 7pm Village Underground in New York City. Get [e-mail] and of course, buy. Bobby Kelly is going to be back with us next week, but he's going to be in Sarasota Poughkeepsie Comedy Works south in Colorado. Batavia, Batavia, Illinois. One of those two. For tickets and all other tour dates, visit Punchup Live. Robert Kelly. And we'll be right back with Chris Stanley. It's the bonfire.

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[Louis J. Gomez]

Pacifico is a Mexican lager brood to be discovered. It's like fresh tracks on a powder day like that uncharted trail, a stone throw away like the perfect wave on a sunny day. Pacifico. Find your own way. 21 plus drink responsibly. Imported by Crown Import, Chicago, Illinois.