Mega Babe w/Ralph Sutton & Aaron Berg

Summary

The Bonfire w/ Big Jay Oakerson & Robert Kelly

Episode: "Mega Babe w/Ralph Sutton & Aaron Berg"
Air Date: November 4, 2025
Guests: Ralph Sutton & Aaron Berg
Host Platform: SiriusXM’s Faction Talk

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Episode Overview

This raucous and unfiltered installment of The Bonfire sees Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly hosting fellow comedians and podcast hosts Ralph Sutton and Aaron Berg. The crew launches into blunt conversations about celebrity encounters, the realities of the comedy business, festival planning mishaps, and hilariously honest discussions about body care products. The mood is irreverent, with a heavy dose of self-deprecation, banter about sexuality and body maintenance, and candid insights into life on and off stage.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Celebrity Roasting: Florence + The Machine

• The episode opens with Jay and Bobby riffing on Florence Welch's looks and performance style following an anecdote about a friend working security for her.
• Notable Moments:
  • Jokes about Florence’s flamboyant outfits and the "ginger" aesthetic dominate.
  • Quote: “You have to be talented when you’re that ugly. She’s certainly not hot.” – Big Jay (01:35)
  • Christine’s enthusiasm as a fan contrasts with the hosts’ relentless teasing.

2. Comedy Festival Poster Mix-up

• A sidebar about Skank Fest’s promotional artwork (05:16–11:00):
  • Jay and Bobby recount an ongoing yearly struggle with event banners that hilariously fail to represent actual headliners.
  • Banners feature obscure or non-participating personalities, including a massive KP Burke poster, while regular hosts (like Bobby) are absent.
  • Quote: “There’s 12 posters delivered and not on any of them is there like a Bobby Kelly. But there is a full KP Burke.” – Jay (09:20)
  • The ongoing bungling underscores the chaos and DIY spirit of comedy festival culture.

3. The Wild World of Gas Digital & SDR Show Crossovers

• Ralph Sutton and Aaron Berg discuss their show, SDR Show, and cross-promotion with Skank Fest (11:00–13:00).
  • Discussion about adult-themed live contests, including a “direct a porn scene” idea.
  • Hot wife lifestyle and the openness of podcast culture to raunchy, participatory events.
  • Quote: “We are going to have a contest. The winner gets to direct a porn scene.” – Aaron (14:56)
  • Reflects the intersection of comedy, podcasting, and sex positivity.

4. Open Talk: Body Image, Food, and Getting Fat

• The comedians launch into self-deprecating stories about losing and gaining weight, fat guy food habits, and the realities of life on the road (16:34–20:30).
  • Quote: “Being fat is not fun. But, you know, living fat, like, doing the stuff... if you don’t care about getting fat, eating whatever you want is fine.” – Jay (17:09)
  • Nostalgic, funny food tour stories (dim sum, bento boxes, Philly cheesesteaks).
  • Jay’s philosophy: Low-rent foodie, with expertise in “the best tuna hoagie in South Philly.” (18:43)
  • Ralph and others describe the double-edged sword of indulgence vs. aftermath.

5. Honesty About Body Care Products

• Jay confesses to buying and loving "Mega Babe" thigh chafe stick—ostensibly a women’s product he swears by (25:21–39:51).
• The guests pile on with their own admissions:
  • Ralph’s “Stay Ready” fiber pills for cleanliness (26:43)
  • Discussions of gendered marketing, self-care taboos for men, and the ridiculousness of product lines like “Mega Man.”
  • Jay’s conviction: “I ain’t going back. I’m gonna keep purchasing it. And I feel like this is a good round table of people here, that someone here owns a girl product, that they stand by.” (26:29)
• Hilarious bravado over fluffier shits, “fluffy bread dumps,” and bidet use.

6. Graphic TMI Tales (Shaving, Bleeding, & Prep for Sex)

• Bobby tells a classic road comic story about prepping for a hookup with extensive shaving, only to nick his testicles and bleed through his underwear—with no payoff (30:32–32:06).
• Jay admits to shaving around his crotch but balks at shaving his asshole—a "line" some men never cross.

7. Candid Bro Talk: Skin Care, Grooming & Embracing “Feminine” Products

• More admissions of using products traditionally marketed to women (under-eye serum, body hair trimmers).
• Call for dropping the gender shame: “Don’t let your pussy get itchy cream—I’m gonna stay ordering that now, by the way.” – Jay (34:46)
• Preference for authenticity, e.g., staying with Mega Babe products vs. switching to "Mega Man" branding (35:10).
• Brief debate: Is skincare “gay,” or just self-care?

8. Taste Demo: Mega Babe Thigh Stick

• Jay shows off his smooth, “corduroy” thighs for the group, with Jacob feeling, smelling, and confirming the Mega Babe’s soft effect (39:00–39:50).
  • Quote: “It smells like a fresh woman. Smells like a mega babe.” – Jacob (39:44)
• Playful encouragement for men to embrace products that work, regardless of branding.

9. Comedy Community, SDR Show Changes, & Tour Dates

• Wrapping up, the hosts highlight upcoming gigs, SDR’s new co-host Aaron Berg, and wishful thinking about being included on future festival posters (41:00–42:57).

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On male insecurity:
  • “You have to be talented when you’re that ugly. She’s certainly not hot.” – Jay (01:35)
  • “There’s 12 posters delivered and not on any of them is there like a Bobby Kelly. But there is a full KP Burke.” – Jay (09:20)
• On honesty in self-care:
  • “I ain’t going back. I’m gonna keep purchasing it... someone here owns a girl product, that they stand by.” – Jay (26:29)
  • “Don’t let your pussy get itchy cream—I’m gonna stay ordering that now, by the way.” – Jay (34:46)
• On festival chaos:
  • “There's a big banner of gay blind Mike and Natalie. ...What is going on here?” – Jay (07:37)
• On embracing new experiences:
  • “If they sponsor me, Mega Babe, I do nothing.” – Jay (33:05)
  • “It smells like a fresh woman. Smells like a mega babe.” – Jacob (39:44)
• On the unpredictability of live contests:
  • “The winner gets to direct a porn scene.” – Aaron (14:56)
  • “One guy killed himself.” – Ralph (16:06, on fallout from prior contest)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

| Timestamp | Topic/Segment | |---------------|---------------------------------------------------------------| | 01:03 | Florence + The Machine roast and Christine’s fandom | | 05:07 | Skank Fest poster debacle and booking inside jokes | | 11:00 | Discussion of adult contest ideas at Skank Fest | | 13:59 | Open talk: hotwifing, relationship dynamics | | 16:34 | Food, fatness, and the road comic lifestyle | | 25:21 | Jay’s “Mega Babe” confession and group roundtable | | 30:32 | Bobby’s shaving misadventure | | 34:46 | Skincare & gender jokes, men using feminine products | | 39:00 | Mega Babe product demo and reactions | | 41:00 | SDR Show, comedy touring, SDR new lineup | | 42:57 | Final plugs and outro |

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Tone, Energy, and Style

Consistently irreverent, bawdy, and rapid-fire, the hosts and guests maintain a playful but self-aware tone that relishes in exposing insecurities, highlighting absurdities, and inviting listeners into the no-holds-barred backstage world of touring stand-up and podcasting culture.

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Bottom Line:
For fans of unvarnished comedy, behind-the-scenes tour tales, and TMI conversations about body hair, grooming, and the indignities of middle age, this episode is a hilarious must-listen. The chemistry between Jay, Bobby, Ralph, and Aaron delivers a signature blend of self-mockery, male vulnerability, and raunch—anchored by camaraderie and candor unique to The Bonfire family.

Transcript

[A]

Ah, the sounds of an Etsy holiday. Now that's special. Want to hear it again? Get original and affordable gifts from small shops on Etsy. For gifts that say, I get, you shop Etsy.

[B]

With my job, I can't drink during the week. Weekends are a different story.

[C]

Ugh.

[D]

After eight hours of this, I have earned my wine.

[E]

You know what I'm saying?

[B]

My family is a lot. It takes me four beers just to hang out with them.

[F]

Binge drinking isn't all college kids doing cake stands. Oregonians in their 30s and 40s binge drink at close to the same rates as younger people, raising our risk for long term health problems. [e-mail] an OHA initiative.

[B]

And now the bonfire with Big J Okerson and Robert Kelly. Hi. Ho ho ho. Ha ha. Bobby, don't forget your. Your stress whistle. Do not forget your stress. But don't.

[E]

How'd it work? Did it work?

[B]

Christine's all soggy in the shorts because she got to see America's favorite female Ron Howard. Florence from Florence in the Machine.

[E]

Oh, that's who. Gav. Gavin, the bodyguard. Patrice's friend. My friend. Your friend? Yeah, that's who. He's bodyguard. That's who.

[B]

He's security for Florence the Machine. Yeah, Florence for Florence herself.

[E]

Florence herself.

[B]

Oh, man.

[E]

That's why he's. He's in town.

[B]

So she yaps too much. She's so cool.

[G]

Why is she so cool? She sings so great. Her music's so good.

[B]

You have to be talented when you're that ugly. She's certainly not hot.

[E]

What does she look like?

[B]

Unattractive ginger lady.

[E]

Was she ever sexy, though.

[B]

I can't doubt. Maybe underneath that thick layer of freckle. Don't turn the mic up. God damn it, Lou. Just the point of me whispering.

[E]

Can I see a picture?

[B]

Yeah. She could sing good, but you have to.

[E]

It looks like she should be selling turkey thighs at a fair.

[B]

It really does. Ren. Fair face.

[E]

Oh, God.

[B]

God, she's so ginger. Her teeth are freckles.

[E]

God damn it. Look at that crowd of fat women.

[B]

Yeah. Everyone's so pasty.

[E]

There's no. Oh, that stupid dress she's wearing, too sucks.

[B]

Yeah. Oh, God. So hot. She is not fun. Oh, she's unpleasant at dinner.

[E]

I do like this song.

[F]

Wood.

[B]

Wood, you're all in.

[E]

Yeah, I do like the song.

[G]

She's so cool. Yeah.

[B]

Your testosterone's at 75, 000, dude. Of course you will.

[E]

She's not you.

[B]

Florence and the Machine.

[H]

Oh, I would rage against It.

[E]

Oh, that's stupid. She's wearing that. That middle aged woman dress like a couch.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

Oh God. This is a good song.

[G]

You know you want to dance.

[E]

I do like this. I do like this song.

[H]

We're so brave.

[G]

I know why you're fronting.

[H]

Keep singing you ginger.

[E]

It might be the drums.

[B]

You know this from the album? Now that's what I call music. To wood nymph too.

[G]

Yeah, the drums are tribal.

[E]

Look at her. Oh, she thinks she's a goddess.

[H]

Christine, what a she is. What a voice.

[E]

Does she play the drum?

[G]

Voice of an angel.

[E]

Why does she have a drum? Why does she have a tom tom in front of her?

[B]

Oh, cuz they woke up.

[H]

Look at her fingers. Sex.

[G]

The mood strikes her and she wants to hit the tom tom.

[B]

Oh my God. This girl's never had.

[G]

She's also barefoot all the time.

[E]

Do they have to put a salt circle around her when she sings?

[H]

Where's the other two?

[G]

I bet they're salt.

[B]

I bet you Florence, by the way, has never had anything other than guy short fingernails.

[H]

Oh, wait, who's that redheaded girl crying at the door?

[B]

Also, that's the other Florence.

[E]

Oh God, that dress is so stupid.

[B]

I know.

[H]

Is this Christine's ringtone?

[G]

I better pussy ringtones were still around.

[B]

I bet her smells like she always just got off a horse.

[E]

I do you think we should introduce our guests?

[B]

They should let Christine go in there.

[H]

I wish it was that horse.

[B]

I thought you said he could get you in.

[G]

No, he was like, maybe I could get you in.

[E]

My guy can get you in. He's head of security for Florence Nightingale. What's her name again?

[F]

You're right. Florence Nightingale.

[H]

Florence against the machine.

[B]

You know these boys from Florence has.

[E]

To use a machine because nobody will fuck her.

[B]

True that. Yeah, Florence, I bet she loves that machine.

[E]

She travels with it.

[B]

Yeah, it was Florence and the Rabbit, but then the Rabbit got out of date and then she got sued for Florence and the Hitachi Magic Wand. A little wordy and trademark problems. You know the SDR show, it's over at Gas Digital. And you know the host, they are our good friends. It is the hilarious Ralph Sutton and Aaron Berg in the house.

[E]

Aaron's gonna be. He's gonna be of course at Skank Fest, but he's also gonna be at Yuk Yuk's in Ottawa November 20th through the 22nd. And then the Dead Crow in Wilmington, North Carolina in November 19th through the 20th. I heard that place is great.

[H]

Yeah, I messed up the dates. December 19th there you go. I messed it up. It's fine.

[E]

Aaronberg.com for his dates. Fucking hilarious.

[B]

Christine, can we thing is it is funny about the artwork confusion or is it. No one's gonna get it. I think it's really funny. I mean particularly. I'll say it. It's funny enough.

[E]

I hope you're gonna say it.

[B]

Yeah, well, I'm just saying it was funny. But it is funny enough. I think people will get it. Is that the. The whoever the artist is for Skankfest? I don't know who these people are, but Christine's dealing with all of it.

[E]

I have a problem with them every year.

[B]

You know that person? Yeah.

[E]

They may be a fat robot. When I got my surgery.

[B]

Correct. Fat robot guy.

[H]

So it should have been you, but with a scar.

[B]

Well, so they. I guess they ordered like a whole bunch of banners and stuff that are gonna be Mardi Gras themed. Of all the people who are gonna be performing at Skankfest and everything. And all they she got sentenced for was a bunch of banners. Giant. Like there's gonna be big banners.

[E]

Am I a fat king with a crown?

[B]

You're not involved.

[G]

You don't exist.

[E]

I'm not. I'm not even in it. Nice.

[B]

No, there is a giant. This is where we started having to figure out what was going on. There's me, Dave and Lewis. There's one of those.

[E]

Yeah, of course.

[B]

Then Shannon and Mike Figgs.

[E]

What?

[B]

Gets better. Don't worry. So turn around. Zia Anderson and Naim Ali.

[E]

Who's that?

[B]

Well, Naim is going to be. He's Philly comic. Very funny. He's going to be at Skankfest. Z is not at Skankfest. A full size by himself. Oh yeah.

[G]

By the way, these are 12 foot by 10 foot banners.

[B]

A full size by himself. KP Burke. Come on.

[E]

I love KP, but.

[B]

I love KP too. But I thought he stopped doing comedy three years ago and then he had a show on Gas Digital.

[H]

Is there one with Stavi and Mondami?

[B]

Nope.

[F]

It seems like it's all Gas Digital shows is what the theme I'm seeing.

[B]

Then here's the kicker. Natalie and gay Blind Mike.

[E]

What?

[F]

Okay, yeah. These are all Gas Digital things.

[B]

So they just posters of Gas Digital people.

[E]

Does he think it's just people from Gas Digital?

[B]

That's what Christine pretended when she passive aggressively emailed back, which I liked. Thought of gangster move. She goes, oh, I think this is a mistake. I think you sent me Gas Digital stuff.

[E]

She really is good at being Passive aggressive.

[B]

I think the guy came back with like a. Oh, this. Yeah, yeah, I think I, Yeah, this was the wrong thing.

[G]

We didn't talk directly. It was just, it was something where. It was just. It was very weird because like we've done. It was kind of a copycat of something that had been done previously. And it was just so funny to have a 12 foot banner of gay blind Mike and Natalie.

[B]

I was like, what is going on here? I keep, I keep seeing every day, like some of the names. I'm not, you know, Christine's doing the festival. I'm doing my own thing. So like. But when I kind of peek in on what's going on, I see some names of people who are there. I'm like, oh shit, those people are there. And you're like, yes. Not on the poster though. That's for gay blind Mike and Natalie.

[E]

Did they have a ten foot cat? Did they have a ten foot poster of Mike Suarez?

[F]

Could you, could you though send those to me? Because I would love to print those out.

[B]

I'm performing in the Suarez stage.

[G]

What I said, I said, are these for the Gas Digital booth?

[H]

Welcome to the Danny Braff Auditorium.

[E]

Are you doing the Paco stage?

[B]

You should keep those. Yeah.

[G]

We have Jade Sound Bob. We have Kevin Smith and Jason Muse.

[B]

And it's like Natalie, I demand, I demand the backdrop for any show I. When I do what I'm doing. What's your fucking deal? When I do the crowd work show, I want the backdrop to be KP Perk. KP Burke, Natalie and gay blind Mike.

[F]

Thumbs up.

[B]

I want those two things behind me at all times. You guys might remember the late, great K.P. burke and lesbian couple Gabe Line. Mike and Natalie.

[E]

You remember K.P. burke. He has a day job. I believe he's a plumber.

[B]

Remember K.P. burke from Comedy a while back? No.

[H]

He cuts down trees. He cuts trees and stuff. Very helpful. Help me do my new fence.

[B]

He's a sweetheart.

[E]

Would you have to give him plugs to do it? No, I love him.

[B]

Guy's a good dude. And his company's name is KP Roofing.

[E]

Yeah, no, he's a great guy.

[H]

He's great.

[B]

Of course.

[E]

And I'm just saying that now because he did it.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

And we all have to do it.

[H]

We both take.

[B]

KP Burke is a lovely guy.

[H]

He's very funny.

[B]

There's nothing to do with any of that. It's just hilarious.

[G]

Poster of him.

[B]

There's, there's 12 posters delivered.

[E]

Can I have one?

[B]

One of them? Yeah. There's 12 post delivered and not on any of them is there like a Bobby Kelly. But there is a full KP Burke.

[H]

You guys should give KP the poster to get.

[B]

They're not gonna print it.

[G]

Do you know how much? Put 20 comics on each.

[B]

Oh, dude, give it to him. $20,000 poster. Here you go.

[E]

Just send him the file.

[G]

You can print this as large as.

[H]

Just computer size paper.

[E]

Sticks it over his $300, but you can have it.

[H]

Is he going?

[B]

Huh?

[H]

Is he going to Skank Fest?

[B]

KP no, he's not going. He's not on it.

[E]

Wow.

[B]

So funny. That is a communication poster's book though.

[E]

You should definitely put these.

[B]

Put the poster up. I agree. I feel like they should be up somewhere. Now that we've told us they could.

[F]

Be all up in the Gas Digital booth. Why not just put them all around the.

[G]

They should be printed. They should be printed as poster.

[B]

What is a Gas Digital booth?

[E]

Were you just gonna hit Ralph?

[B]

No. What's a Gas Digital booth?

[F]

We have a booth this year for signups for Skank Fest. At Skank Fest?

[H]

Yeah.

[B]

To people to subscribe. Sign up for Gas Digital.

[H]

And we have a contest that we're doing.

[B]

It's really big. It's. Someone gets to KP Burke.

[H]

Change this contest.

[F]

We're still working on this.

[E]

We worked on it. The winner gets a K.P. burke.

[F]

Yeah. The winner gets limited edition of one.

[B]

And also K.P. burke is allowed to compete. We should say. Yeah, well, the contest changed. It was like you get to suck and a couple or watch them. Yes.

[H]

Then we had.

[E]

Wait a minute. Stop, stop, stop, stop. What?

[F]

It was a great name too.

[E]

What is. What? What is the contest?

[H]

Can I say the name?

[F]

Say the name.

[H]

Couples Cox cunts and Cox C4. So there's this girl named Savvy Sucks.

[E]

C4.

[F]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

How about the four Cs?

[F]

C4 was because of the whole dynamite explosion.

[H]

So she's gorgeous and she has this fiance and he's a very nice guy.

[E]

That means he's ugly.

[H]

No, he's cute.

[B]

He's good looking and he's not as hot as her cute was.

[H]

He's.

[E]

When you're hot as her, you don't let her fuck other guys.

[H]

She's smoking. Do you know what she's smoking Hot.

[B]

You know what she looks like?

[E]

No.

[F]

She's wildly hot.

[B]

Okay.

[E]

Why, what's her name?

[H]

Savvy Sucks.

[E]

Oh, I do know. I. Wait a minute.

[H]

S A V. V. I had them on my show.

[E]

I Just had them on my show. Yeah, I know who they are. I just had them on ykwd.

[H]

You just pretended you did.

[E]

I didn't know. She's smoking hot, but.

[H]

Smoking hot.

[E]

He's not. But he's not. He's a. I guess. Cute.

[H]

Yeah, that's what I said, cute.

[E]

But he's very. He's very timid.

[B]

Can you guys stop calling this guy cute?

[C]

He's cute.

[F]

You're getting intimidated.

[E]

He's cute.

[H]

Look how happy he is.

[C]

He's.

[F]

Yeah, he's living the good life.

[E]

He's an 11.

[F]

Yeah.

[E]

And he's a 4. He.

[H]

Hot wives. That's what this thing is called.

[F]

A very big thing.

[H]

Hot wife.

[B]

So she goes. And other people. He watches.

[E]

Yeah, no, he does. He film it. Jesus Christ.

[F]

He's involved sometimes as well.

[E]

Yeah, if I had a hot wife, I'd let her. I'd make her people for money, too.

[B]

Yeah, hot wife is the term, actually. It's a. It's a.

[F]

It's a style.

[B]

It's a searchable porn term.

[E]

Yeah, well, my. If I had Don, people would be like, she's good.

[B]

She's a good wife.

[E]

She's a good wife.

[B]

She's a hot. She's a good wife.

[E]

She's a good wife.

[B]

No, no. Here's the beauty of the situation. I appears. It doesn't matter if she's morbidly obese, ugly as all hell, or whatever, because the action is called hot wifing.

[H]

That's right.

[B]

They're going to get to be called a hot wife.

[E]

She's fat. It's just that she's hot.

[B]

Still hot wife. It's just because she's hot and bothered, ready to get plowed by.

[E]

She's using your cream on her inner thighs. What is it called?

[B]

I'll bring it back up again. I'm telling you, this is the right group to bring this up in, but we want to talk about the contest first. But this is the right crew for what I was saying.

[H]

So. Savvy thing. She has to.

[B]

He took her last name.

[H]

Yeah, he's Alex. Sucks.

[B]

Yeah, dude.

[F]

That's how you know who the hotter one is.

[B]

Very progressive.

[E]

Yeah, he's not. Yeah, smoking hot. Dude's not gonna let him.

[H]

Mr. And Mrs. Sucks, welcome to the Louis Vuitton cafe.

[B]

Everything's in. Everything's in her name. By the way, I. Christine does a lot of that relationship. No, no, no. Throughout our relationship that I've really like. I try to get better at myself just doing. Because I don't like that feeling at all. Like I ever over thought about Christine. Like, when we get to places, sometimes there was a reservation necessary or something. Like we went for Isabelle's birthday to quality meets. And you go in there and it's like, reservation. It's always like for Evans. Yeah, yeah. Like she's letting us know when they're ready for us. And Christine's like, hey, come on, guys. They're ready for us.

[C]

Yeah.

[G]

I open table and my last name is Evans.

[B]

Oh, you chicken. Oh, I hate it. Go ahead. I'm sorry.

[H]

Yeah, she's out. She has a medical thing she has to deal with. So Ralph and I came up with this new. I'm not gonna get into it.

[E]

We know what it is.

[B]

Yeah. So her asshole fell out.

[E]

Yeah. Something with her vagina died. She has to get it fucking reconfigured.

[B]

Yeah. Eventually their assholes fall out. That's when you know you're done.

[E]

It's not migraines.

[B]

Yeah.

[H]

And so now we had this new idea where we.

[F]

Well, we. We were spitballing it in the. In the lobby.

[H]

I think it's a great idea, Ralph.

[E]

Well, you get. You have to find out what's wrong with her vagina.

[F]

We give you a speculation in the elevator. It's a wheel.

[H]

You spin it in the elevator.

[B]

You guys came in each other's mouths and started spitting it back and forth.

[H]

Ralph, what if we do this as a contest?

[B]

We were spitballing in the elevator and.

[H]

Thought, I love this idea.

[B]

This is the show.

[H]

Ralph doesn't want me to say it.

[B]

No. Say it.

[F]

Yeah, say it.

[B]

I'm fine with it.

[H]

We are going to have a contest. The winner gets to direct a porn scene.

[B]

Whose porn scene?

[F]

That we're working out.

[B]

TDA Got you. Okay. But someone will let that happen.

[F]

Yeah. Yeah, for sure. So that was what we just kind of.

[B]

Joanna angel will let anyone do anything to her anywhere at any time.

[F]

Yes. That actually was someone that they texted me.

[B]

She's walked away from the Lord, Christ and everyone who loves her.

[H]

Really?

[B]

I don't know. Yeah.

[H]

So it's got to be cool. You get to direct a scene. You get to tell.

[F]

Yeah, however you want. Whatever you want to happen. I think that would be fun.

[H]

What if you just do it very honestly and be like, come right away.

[B]

He goes heavier. Heavier lighting. No, like, really just turn like the room lights on.

[H]

He has no idea how big are supposed to work.

[B]

Yeah. I want you to microphone the outside of her asshole while she's getting fucked. I want to hear If a fart happens.

[H]

That's a great idea.

[B]

It is.

[H]

Don't you love a fart during sex?

[B]

But don't you know not having one, watching one is funny on a porn.

[E]

Don't you think that somebody but the people that are entering this conversation are going to want a fart? Right.

[F]

I think what we found out when we did it with Jay. There was a two years ago when you could have sex with Brendan McKenna. A lot of the people you could.

[B]

Jay in front of a lot of.

[F]

People did not want to be the one that submitted themselves.

[B]

One guy killed himself.

[F]

Yeah, one guy killed himself.

[E]

Why did.

[F]

And one guy threatened to kill himself. The guy that won for what?

[B]

Right.

[G]

Well, the guy he owed.

[F]

Well, they got OD'd. He just.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, one guy OD'd.

[F]

Yeah, he partied a little.

[B]

He was too happy because he didn't win.

[E]

You have to redo your fan base every year.

[F]

No, the one who won did not kill himself, but the one who didn't win did.

[B]

Oh, but she was going to fuck him anyway, right?

[F]

And then she got sick and then didn't have sex. Yeah.

[B]

Could you believe it? The guy was in shape.

[F]

He was in good shape.

[B]

He was in really good shape. And he killed himself better than me. What an idiot.

[F]

Not as big as you. More. More trim.

[E]

That's such a fat, fat guy thing to say. Dude. The guy had a good body. Why would he kill himself?

[B]

Oh, absolutely. If I saw somebody, someone's like, like hanging suicide and. And they just had a huge dick hanging down, I'd be like, what an idiot doing.

[E]

Dude, he's got a V dick.

[B]

Ab.

[E]

That was huge fat dick.

[B]

You killed yourself.

[E]

Get over it.

[B]

Yeah, listen, kill yourself, but get fat first. Like also enjoy that. Hey, I'm going out anyway. Let me eat. Like until I stop having a giving a about that. Then. And then I'll kill myself.

[H]

Yeah, but it's getting fun. Getting fat. That fun?

[E]

Yes.

[B]

Yeah.

[H]

Really?

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

I think if you don't care about getting fat, eating whatever you want is fine.

[E]

Let me tell you something. You go on the road and you can order takeout all day. Go back to the room.

[B]

I'm not even abundance. I'm just talking about the other. You stop giving a fuck. It's like whenever I come home to my hotel room afterwards, I'm ordering whatever.

[H]

The fuck I feel bad after.

[F]

I feel like shit, buddy. Like that.

[B]

Yeah, no, you do, but the next hour. But the next morning you don't give a fuck.

[F]

Yeah.

[E]

Do you eat like drugs as soon as you eat, you like fucking like heroin. You just out. Then you wake up the next day, go to breakfast, you can go to ramen.

[B]

You start taking really mean shits.

[E]

Great shits.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Being fat was great, mean shit. Come on. No, I disagree. Being fat is not fun. But, you know, living fat, like, doing the stuff. And I'm also. I'm not even like a big foodie. That's what I'm saying. But for me, the idea of what you have to go through to sculpt your body to look awesome, to hang yourself during that phase seems stupid.

[E]

As you 100 a foodie. I've never seen anybody hand somebody a pork sandwich. It's almost like you're handing somebody their new baby.

[B]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. But that's like, you go.

[E]

You literally go dead. Try that.

[H]

Yeah, Jay's a foodie, but he's a low rent foodie.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[H]

With the cheesesteak. He's like, oh, God, this is so good. It's like eight bucks.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[E]

Christine is too.

[B]

I mean, 14 bucks.

[E]

When you got that, he had a dessert bento box at his house that he was like, wait, little. Wait till you see what we're getting. And then it never disappoints. It was a bento box.

[B]

No, but what he's saying is absolutely right. But if you're like, what's the best steak? And I don't know.

[F]

I don't know.

[B]

I don't know about, like, the best seafood or blue collar foodie. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm a foodie on, like. I could tell you where the best tuna hoagie is in South Philly.

[E]

That's a foodie, right?

[F]

Yeah.

[H]

Any Wawa, probably.

[E]

No, it's at.

[B]

Wawa is a pretty solid, isn't it? For sure. My favorite's at Pat's place.

[H]

The Pats you took me to once outside of Philly, like on the way to Camden. That's the one. The best cheesesteak I ever had.

[F]

Did you do the one in my neighborhood? That is what's owned by what's his name? Bradley Cooper. Is that any good?

[B]

It's okay.

[H]

I saw him eating it.

[B]

Yeah, it was okay.

[E]

When I was touring with Stavi, I did a small little theater tour with him. Yeah, it was the best tour I've ever been on. Because all we did was search.

[B]

Dude, your tour bus weighed more by the end of that tour. Yeah, the tour bus on the truck. If you wait. If you wait. The tour bus on a truck. Wave.

[E]

If we saw the word dim sum. We just stopped.

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

And went in. We went into a dim sum restaurant. It was only me and him at one point. And they were just bringing dumplings after dumplings after dump. Then we'd go do a show.

[H]

Yeah.

[E]

And then we go out to eat after.

[B]

I did definitely do abundance eating, but like more like I ate all of it. What Bobby's talking about. Those things weren't really my draws ever. Like an all you can eat but keep going back kind of thing. Wasn't me. It's just what I'm gonna eat is gonna be shitty. I'm all about like, I'm gonna eat a big thing of pasta. Like that kind of. So that's what I mean by getting fat. To me, it's not really about like, I never had those. Like, I had 11 cheeseburgers yesterday and four orders of French. I never ate like that. It was never my thing.

[H]

You ever do caviar bumps?

[B]

I love it.

[F]

Yeah. I'm a high brow foodie for sure. And low brow. I like.

[B]

What's a caviar bump?

[F]

They serve you caviar like you.

[B]

Why are you wearing khaki pants and light colored shirts? Why are you becoming age appropriate?

[F]

I'm going to a fancy dinner after this, actually.

[B]

Sweatpants. You just said I'm wearing sweatpants. And as I'm going to a fancy.

[F]

Dinner, the button down shirt on, that's my biggest fear.

[E]

Dressing age appropriate. I've looked at a couple khakis. I'm like, those look comfortable as super comfortable.

[B]

Not me.

[E]

You know what?

[B]

Me and Aaron commit to the look.

[H]

Dude, I. I started going with these guys. I got loafers on. No socks.

[B]

No, but you're wearing like. You got a thing going on here.

[E]

You have no socks. You're Miami.

[H]

Yeah, Miami.

[C]

Yeah.

[H]

That's my look now is Miami. Are you gonna do this till you die? Jeans and hoodies?

[B]

Well, yeah, let's assume I'm dying in the next decade. Yes, it probably is.

[E]

Jesus, Jay, don't say that.

[B]

What? I can't get r those blood.

[E]

I don't want to see.

[B]

I have too much blood in me.

[H]

I sent you the place to go. Did you not get the test?

[B]

No, I saw. I'll go with you.

[H]

You want to go?

[B]

I don't have time to get there, man. I'm just going to live with this extra blood.

[H]

10 minutes away.

[E]

You're going to die. It's dangerous tomorrow.

[B]

Can I squeeze it out of me? Drain your blood.

[E]

Squeeze it out.

[B]

Thursday what are you having done?

[C]

What do you want to have done?

[B]

Doctor says I have too much blood. What?

[E]

What does that even mean? His gleeping glue.

[H]

Fat. He said too much fat.

[E]

His. When you do testosterone, your blood thickens.

[H]

Yeah. Or you get more awesome.

[E]

Yeah. You can. You can either lower your testosterone.

[B]

How awesome I've been getting.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

So, you know, I mean, this guy. Good.

[F]

Good.

[B]

Ralph. Yeah.

[E]

It's all thick blood.

[B]

That's why most of that's blood. Most of that's just coagulated blood. Everybody. Have you noticed that everywhere you go it seems like prices are going up? They keep saying it. The grocery store, your cars, your appliances, everything is through the roof right now. Wouldn't it be nice if prices would go down? Well at Metro? They've got your back. They've lowered their prices and are giving you a five year price guarantee on talk, text and data. One line now 20% lower. Family plans also lowered. And you also get a free 5G phone, all with no ID required and no activation fees. Stop by your neighborhood Metro store, Visit metro by t-mobile.com or call to find out about their amazing offers. Bring your number. Not available if currently at T Mobile or with Metro in the past 180 days. Guarantee covers monthly price of on network, Talk, text and 5G data for customers Activating on eligible plan exclusions. Apply details at metro by t-mobile.com youm know running a business is hard enough, so why make it harder? With a dozen different apps that don't talk to each other. One for sales, another for inventory, a separate one for accounting. Before you know it, you're drowning in software. Instead of growing your business, this is where Odoo comes in. Odoo is the only business software you'll ever need. It's an all in one fully integrated platform that handles everything. CRM, accounting, inventory, E commerce, hr, and so much more. No more app overload, no more juggling logins. Just one seamless system that makes work easier. And the best part, Odoo replaces multiple expensive platforms for a fraction of the cost. It's built to grow with your business, whether you're just starting out or already scaling up. Plus, it's easy to use, customizable and designed to streamline your every process so you can focus on what really matters running your business. Thousands of businesses have made the switch, so why not you try Odoo for [e-mail] that's o d o o.com Cold mornings, holiday plans.

[E]

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[D]

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[B]

Yeah, so the thing I was trying to get to before.

[E]

Yes, sir.

[B]

Was seeing if these guys would have a similar thing I impulse bought while online at the pharmacy. A thing that I just, I didn't look at the title or the name of the company or the brand. I just saw the packaging said, relieves inner thigh chafing, rubbing, shit like that. And I was like, it's like a stick. And I was like, okay, great, I'm gonna buy it.

[H]

Yeah.

[B]

And I got it and I love it. And I've been using it for two weeks. And this weekend, I don't know what, I was putting the cap back on it afterwards and I'm talking about got my leg up on a, you know, sink. I'm. It's like deodorant roll on.

[E]

It's rolling on.

[B]

It's like deodorant rolling on. I'm rolling it in my. What would be called the groin area.

[E]

Yeah. Your coochie?

[B]

Yeah, my coochie. Right where my butt cheeks meet my leg and my leg meets my butt ball sack area. That area.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

Painting it up.

[H]

Yeah, I love it. Like a pretty girl.

[B]

Like a pretty, pretty girl. Well, funny you should say that. I look at the company of. What's the title of this thing? Megababe, which is a very, I guess, prominent girls brand of things.

[H]

Yeah.

[B]

And I say this also. I ain't going back. I'm gonna keep purchasing it. And I feel like this is a good round table of people here, that someone here owns a girl product, that they stand by. Come on, back me up.

[F]

Anybody I could do.

[B]

Thank you, Ralph.

[F]

I was take. I take these fiber pills.

[B]

He's gonna be like, I blow guys just to be. Just to understand what a woman goes through.

[E]

I do it with lipstick.

[B]

Okay. Okay, sure. That's not what I was gonna go with, but okay.

[F]

I take these fiber pills and my trainer one day said to me, do you still take those gay fiber pills? I'm like, what's gay about it? It's helping me.

[B]

Oh, it's just prep. It's just prep. It's not fiber pills at all.

[E]

It's azt.

[F]

It's fiber pills.

[E]

It's what saved Magic Johnson.

[F]

Hey, look at those gay pills. Gay pills. It's fiber pill it to gay men so they have clean.

[B]

Oh, so everything gets out of you.

[F]

Yeah, it's called Stay Ready.

[E]

Oh, I can.

[F]

For gay men. Christine and I still use them to this day.

[B]

Order me a pack of Stay Ready.

[E]

I say we test it right now and. Ralph in the ass.

[F]

There they go.

[G]

Damn.

[F]

They're marketed to men because sexiness starts on the inside.

[E]

How does it clean? How does it clean the peanut butter out?

[B]

Now? Could this make a. Do you still. Do you have to multiple times a day?

[F]

I a lot. Yeah. Do you a lot?

[B]

But then it evens out or you.

[F]

Always shit multiple times? I have two shits a day.

[B]

Really?

[F]

Two productive shits.

[E]

Ralph shits must look like he sounds probably.

[B]

They have bolts in their neck. They're all. They're all just a. They're a car battery jump away from coming alive.

[F]

Ralph.

[E]

Don't flush me. His shit's trying to crawl out of the toilet. He's gonna kick him back down.

[B]

Angry.

[F]

Angry.

[H]

The girl in the ring coming out of the TV.

[B]

25 reviews now.

[C]

Extra strength two.

[B]

That's what I'm saying. I don't want to have to when.

[F]

I real productive shits. You feel so much better, but I.

[B]

Don'T want to when I'm out and about.

[F]

For me it's first thing in the morning all the time. Two shits in the morning.

[B]

Then what? Two.

[F]

Two. Like one when I get up and one about an hour later.

[E]

Let me ask you.

[B]

I could do that. And then I'm giving.

[E]

Nothing does this because I've. I've a bunch of different ways.

[F]

Like upside down, my.

[E]

My comes out. You know. Sometimes it's, you know, mooi. Whatever. Sometimes it's nice. Too hard. Yeah, like too hard sometimes because I mean too much protein. But when I'm eating just right, it comes out fluffy like bread. And it leaves not like I can literally pick it up and no would get on my hand. What is that?

[B]

Why would you know that? It.

[E]

No. Because I picked it up.

[B]

That means you picked it up.

[E]

I took a bite. Listen, I'm Jay, but Bobby, I have.

[B]

Too much blood for this.

[E]

If Jay just died and blood came.

[B]

Out of his eyes, by the way, I'm telling you, I had a headache this morning. I'm like too much blood. It's gonna start coming out of my nose. I'm just gonna start leaving.

[F]

Very productive, Fluffy. It's very easy to come out. It is Fluffy.

[E]

Does it hurt at all? Using your.

[F]

You're using your vernacular will say Fluffy doesn't hurt to come out at all.

[B]

You lose a couple of lv.

[F]

What's up everybody?

[H]

I'm Fluffy.

[F]

Does this help get out Gabrielle and Glaciers Fluffy? Yeah.

[B]

When you first start taking this to start getting out some old that's in there.

[E]

You can win his at a fair. A kid just won one of Ralph shits.

[B]

All right, so Ralph takes gay prep meds.

[E]

That tells you something.

[B]

What do you do, Bobby? You have a girl product somewhere? Do you had a girl product when you were younger or something? I've used girl razors a ton. I've also used girl deodorant.

[E]

Guy raises are way better than girl. Yeah.

[B]

Now depends for where.

[E]

For my head.

[B]

Okay. What about your beanbag?

[E]

I don't nobody shaved their beanbag.

[B]

And that's why I stays getting. Yes, Jacob. With the straight razor.

[F]

With a regular razor.

[C]

Yeah. You gotta pull it tight.

[H]

What do you do with Jacobs? Not tech. What do you do?

[E]

I tell you the 1.

[B]

Stretch your mouth, Jacob, right?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And then you.

[C]

I mean, I give credit to Jay. You got me.

[B]

It's easy.

[E]

I'll tell you. One time I was at. Remember Stanford and Sons.

[B]

Yeah, of course.

[E]

Okay. I was after there's crazy gig the guy who ran at Lunatic Yeah, the Shavey Ball hanging out after the show, the brother was hanging with a porn star that was from the town, back in town. And I started talking. I was like, just. I was like, you do this, you that. I go, I like my ass eating you. And she goes, I'll eat your ass tonight. And I was like, you will? She goes, I'll 100% come and blow you and eat your ass tonight. I was like, okay. After my second show, I'm staying at this hotel. This is my room. She goes, I'll meet you there. I gotta go out with these guys. And then when I come back, I'll do it. I went back to the room waiting. She didn't show up on time. So I washed my ass. When I went back, I washed my ass like six times. I just kept. Cause it was hot. I kept getting hot. So then I went in and I went, I'm gonna shave my butthole and I'm gonna shave my balls. I wanted to shave everything.

[B]

Your butthole?

[E]

Yeah, I shaved, like under, you know, underneath your sack, near your.

[H]

Yeah, I know where your butthole is.

[F]

Thanks for the anatomy lesson.

[E]

So I shave my balls where the butthole lies. I shaved my balls and I nicked all my little wrinkles in my nut.

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

And it looked like somebody was murdered.

[B]

Oh, yeah, the bag bleeds a lot. I've nicked it before, buddy.

[F]

This is why you don't do that.

[B]

It's a superficial.

[E]

Well, you think it's not a superficial, Nick. It looked like I murdered somebody.

[F]

Did she show up?

[B]

It doesn't match superficial, Nick. You're not getting down to ball. You're not getting down to ball Juice.

[E]

I've never seen her again.

[F]

Oh, she did show up.

[E]

No, no, it was all for nothing. I had to get up for the plane at, like 6 o', clock, and I was all sad with a.

[F]

A pool of blood in the bed or.

[E]

No, I had to throw my underwear up. My underwear was bloody.

[B]

If I nick my balls right now, I'm just gonna let it bleed out. I have to get rid of some of this blood anyway. Like, yo, get this blood out of me.

[E]

I'll never shave my balls again.

[C]

She never showed.

[B]

I love it. Never showed about your balls. I saw you got the microphone.

[E]

Oh, it was a sad. One of the saddest nights of my life. And I wasn't even, like, fat. I was, like, in shape at that time. I had a lot of confidence. I was like, this chick's coming. I had. I was so happy. I was gonna shave My ass. Make it nice and neat. Shave my balls. Have I trimmed my bush fat? Nothing.

[H]

I have no idea how to shave my ass.

[B]

I couldn't even guess how to start. Yeah, I shaved.

[H]

You used to.

[B]

My asshole? Yeah. Never ever. No, my. I shaved. But I'm telling you, I try to go down back of the ball bag, though. There should be nothing on the balls because that would look ridiculous. Some of your balls.

[E]

I didn't shave my ass.

[B]

But above my dick hair.

[H]

Yeah.

[B]

On the side. You know, like the. Around the base of it.

[H]

Nike Swoosh.

[B]

A little Nike Swoosh? Yeah. I did a half Horizon.

[E]

You're gonna put that deodorant stick logo on your bush fat. Now trim that in.

[B]

If they sponsor me Mega Babe, I do nothing.

[H]

Chapstick is the closest I come.

[B]

Did you order me Mega Babe? This little holder in the mini. Thank you. Chapstick.

[H]

That's the. That's the.

[B]

That's not what they do.

[H]

And I'm thinking about shaving my legs.

[E]

I used. I used.

[B]

Yes, you bodybuild before. The whole process is very gay. I know. My stepfather is shaving your body hair. Having your friends. I don't know how hairy you've ever been. My stepfather is a wolf. So it would be very gay to shave him down. You had every fucking son.

[H]

You shaved your dad?

[B]

Well, me and him. My stepfather. Even worse. He could have raped me.

[E]

You shaved your dad?

[B]

Yeah. That's not his dick.

[H]

Ralph put me onto a product. So I don't even need my wife anymore.

[E]

Is it gay vitamins?

[H]

No, it's this escort website.

[B]

Harrow Stock.

[H]

It's a thing that you shave your own back with. And it was the most pleasant experience I've had.

[E]

You can't have any nuggets, though. I. I gave that to Kalta. But he has all those little Italian nuggets on the back.

[B]

I got nothing.

[E]

And he just cut them all off.

[B]

Stop.

[F]

Don't.

[B]

He doesn't want you to tell people that.

[H]

I must shave of my back. And I'm a bleed so much.

[E]

I used.

[B]

Oh, meatball. Meat the ball.

[E]

I use the. My wife's. She has this serum for under your eyes.

[H]

Jizz.

[E]

So it's. It might be. It was just consistent.

[B]

Neighbor come.

[E]

It was a neighbor. But you put it under your eyes and it makes your bag go. Your bags go away. I want that so it tightens up so you like. You know, I have a little bag right here. Especially in the morning. You put that on. It's a little roll on. Or it Comes.

[H]

Oh, I do use that.

[B]

But is that gay?

[F]

Is that gay?

[E]

I don't know.

[B]

No, I didn't. First of all, you guys are having this self problem here and I use Mega Baby. I didn't call any of this gay. I told you guys that I'm making an active decision to stay in the Mega Babe. Don't let your pussy get itchy cream. I'm gonna stay ordering that now, by the way, we found today and going through it, they've got a male wing of just that product, same exact ingredients, called Mega Man.

[E]

But the stick, it looks manly.

[B]

But I don't want no parts of that now. It's not funny. If the Mega Babe is the same thing I found it as Mega Babe, I'm staying Mega Babe.

[E]

But they also have a keychain top that you can put on that he's gonna order.

[B]

I'm also gonna get a fucking gay asshole with Ralph's thing. And I'm gonna have a fucking bald back and a bunch of fucking. I. I find that if I have.

[H]

A lumpy bag, Mega Man's probably the exact same as the Mega.

[F]

It is. He said, yeah, just smells more manly.

[B]

No, they're both unscented. But here's the thing, and I got.

[E]

That so I can carry around to carry his. It's called the Mega Babe Pocketbook, by the way.

[B]

I love that it's gonna show the words. It keeps. It gets rid of the words Mega Babe with the word Mega Babe and then keeps thigh rescue, anti chafe stick, anti friction.

[F]

It's a roll on.

[B]

Yeah, it's great deodorant, right? It looks like deodorant because I have.

[F]

Something like that for running. You put it over your nips. Same thing. I do that all the time, but.

[B]

I assume it's probably a similar thing.

[E]

What, do your nips get hurt when you run?

[F]

When you're running in the heat?

[B]

Well, if you don't wear a bra.

[F]

Yeah, if you don't wear a bra.

[E]

You wear a bra.

[B]

Oh, no, what's that now? They got a whole bunch of Mega man products here. Dry Guy Talc, Free Body Power. I feel like I like that.

[E]

I thought that said dry gut. That's for your fat stomach. Just rub it on.

[B]

Oh, so you think Mega Babe doesn't work for undergut? It does. Aaron, you don't understand what I'm talking about here. Under gut. You know what I'm talking about, Ralph. You've been there. You've had a little undergut in your life before. Very, very briefly. Very little.

[F]

Yes, yes.

[B]

Undergut. Megababe works there, too.

[E]

Does it change the color of it?

[B]

Damage is done there. We could always asshole bleach our fucking fat rolls. Wait, whoa. Mega Man's got a whole.

[C]

The ball.

[B]

Oh, here's the thing. I don't want balls.

[H]

When you get fat, your skin turns color.

[B]

Well, can we? Well, if it rubs together.

[E]

If your skin doesn't see sun. For seven years, Aaron, you've been attracted.

[B]

To somehow morbidly obese women in your life.

[H]

I still am.

[B]

And you've never seen the inside of the legs, like, are, like. It's like, almost like they're dying. Like they're necrotic.

[E]

You've never been with a girl.

[H]

Oh, look at that. That's a problem.

[E]

You've never been with a girl. The inside of her thighs look like an elephant's knee pad.

[H]

No.

[F]

I like Aaron, how you've been disgusted about all this fat conversation. You've never been fat, I guess. Ever.

[H]

I was chubby, okay? When I was young.

[B]

Look at all this. But listen, can we. Do me a favor?

[F]

Come on now.

[H]

Hey. Is that what your thighs look like?

[B]

No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Thank God.

[E]

Not that bad.

[B]

What do you mean, not that bad? Not anything like that.

[E]

No, no. I mean, I wasn't speaking for you. I mean, I was, but I'm the same as you.

[B]

I wanted to. Here we go, Big Jim. You listening out there? They always ask, what products do we want to promote? I think this is a great product. Genuinely. I found them.

[E]

But not Mega Man.

[B]

I do not want to be involved in Mega Man.

[E]

I would take Mega Man. You can do Mega Babe, I'll do.

[B]

Mega Babe, and then we'll do both products.

[H]

Okay?

[F]

I want you all to do the gay pills and see if you really shit your pains out.

[H]

I think you will do Asshole Ready like Ralph did.

[F]

You never know when that stripper might show up. And you want a clean asshole.

[H]

What's it called?

[E]

She Has a Boyfriend.

[F]

Stay Ready.

[H]

Stay Ready.

[B]

Oh, yeah. Have your asshole ready to go.

[G]

Stay ready.

[C]

What does it do, Jay? It just.

[B]

It blows everything out of your asshole. So your asshole is ready for dick.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

No, no, not that.

[F]

Oh, I get that. Oh.

[C]

Oh, I get that.

[B]

Apologies, apologies.

[C]

The thigh stick. Is that. So it just makes your thighs glide, I guess.

[E]

You have gliding thighs.

[H]

Jay, walking down the airport.

[B]

Yeah. It's like, man, my skin's corduroy. You want to feel my inner thighs?

[C]

Kind of does it.

[F]

Is it. Is it a one application, a day thing, or is it through a few times a day.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

You have to have it in your. Your purse.

[B]

Lou, you can't film this.

[H]

You want me to film this?

[B]

Of course I have it on now.

[E]

You should feel.

[B]

You should feel.

[E]

Ralph will go up. Jacob, you should feel Ralph's thighs first.

[C]

Sweaty ball bag.

[B]

It's not by my sweaty anything. It's smooth.

[F]

This is a very.

[E]

Oh, Jason.

[C]

Feeling.

[E]

Does it feel good?

[C]

It feels nice.

[E]

Nice.

[C]

It's soft.

[B]

Yeah. If you want, you can film this from behind.

[H]

That's how Ralph likes to be filmed.

[F]

That's going to be the guy that wins the the contest at SiriusXM.

[B]

Oh my. Come on.

[H]

But Bobby, compare it to the rest of his skin. Feel his arms.

[E]

Let me see your. Now that's. That's a manly rough.

[B]

Now here's the thing. I also lotion.

[C]

I'm gonna.

[E]

But that is rougher than right here. This is.

[C]

I'm gonna smell the inner thigh.

[E]

Like this feels like.

[B]

And also the smell.

[C]

Pleasant. So pleasant. Jenny Jay's in her thigh.

[E]

Oh, that smells.

[F]

No. Aaron looks unhappy with all that smell.

[E]

Ralph's and it didn't.

[B]

Right.

[C]

It smells like a fresh woman.

[B]

Smells like a mega babe. Yeah, I wish. That's a st. Spenders do this. When I said that.

[E]

Turn that down.

[H]

Well, that's good for you, man.

[E]

Ralph, let's smell your.

[H]

Stay ready with Ralph's ass.

[E]

Ralph, get your asshole. Stick it in Jacob's nose.

[F]

Jacob, do film.

[C]

Stay ready.

[B]

Now. Ralph, let's make sure you're ready. We're trying to get new products going over here. Let me double finger your. I bet it's zero. This guy took us two fluffy dumps today.

[F]

Last knuckle.

[E]

You have to wrap a tissue around your finger and if anything comes out.

[B]

Oh, you and your fluffy bread dumps. Oh, you. Oh my God. We have to go. What the fuck happened?

[E]

Well, yeah.

[B]

What do you mean?

[E]

You got your dates. Aaronberg.com.

[H]

Yeah.

[E]

You're gonna be in.

[B]

He's gonna be at Skangfest today. He's gonna be in Ottawa.

[E]

He's not gonna have a poster, but he's gonna be there.

[B]

Dead crow in Wilmington, North Carolina. There's no room for posts like that. We have to make sure we get Gabelin, Mike and Natalie out.

[G]

There's an SDR show poster.

[B]

There is SDR show. You guys did make the cut, but it's a little bit smaller than Gabe line.

[H]

Mike and Natalie, you didn't even ask us.

[B]

And since you left, I don't want to know.

[F]

And also last Time I was here, Doug was sorry.

[B]

It's been going since Dove left also.

[H]

Yeah.

[E]

How's it going?

[H]

It's very fun.

[E]

Yeah. I mean it seems like a bet. I love Dove. It seems like a better.

[F]

He was my first pick. When Jay had to leave.

[B]

You couldn't do it.

[F]

You couldn't do it.

[H]

I said no because I didn't want to be around all he was actually Jay's first.

[E]

Dan had to leave, was he? No.

[B]

I didn't want to be around the born stars. And now I do want to be.

[H]

Around now I do. They're really fun.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. And they'll watch your daughter. They'll watch your daughter for you, which is nice.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

Let a babysit yet? Oh, you got a little baby. So they're the best. Dude. Isabella learned how to go air duck. They call it duck water tight.

[E]

Make sure you check out the SDR show right now available on Gas Digital. We got. We got Aaron Berg is the new host with him. That seems like a great matchup. Go check out their show.

[B]

If he already darts, his holes are empty.

[E]

We got a clean asshole.

[F]

Maybe direct your own porn at Skank Fest with us. That might be fun.

[H]

Yeah.

[E]

Yeah. If she doesn't get sick too. I hope these fucking. These. Yeah, these sluts. Keep it together.

[B]

All I'm saying is everybody keep your.

[E]

Assholes empty and make sure you check out. Make sure you check out Jay.

[B]

Where's Jay gonna be still Berg. He's got the Modern man podcast available on YouTube as well.

[E]

All right, check him [e-mail]. he's gonna be all over the place. Big J is going to be at the Comedy Mothership. It's sold out, so you can probably get on standby, see if they have any tickets available. People cancel all the time. But then that's this weekend.

[B]

Cancel all the time.

[E]

Yeah. I'm just saying that for hope they.

[G]

Do stand by though.

[B]

Tampa.

[E]

I got it. Shut up.

[B]

We did finally had the show once it's out of here.

[E]

Tampa, New Orleans. Make sure you check out Jay in Tampa at these side splitters. November 2nd. What is it? October 31st through the 2nd and then New Orleans Skank Fest in Salt Lake City for tickets all the toy days. BigJ.Comedy.com.

[B]

He didn't say they had the shows at all.

[E]

What's that? You didn't have what?

[B]

We'll see you guys tomorrow.

[E]

Thank you, Ralph and Aaron, you. You're chiming every time I'm doing myself.

[B]

Saturday, November, coming from home at TD Guard.

[E]

Punch up Duck Live.

[B]

And then New Orleans and then Point Pleasant and Rhode island and New Jersey. Punch up that live Robert Kelly.

[E]

See you guys.

[A]

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[B]

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[H]

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