Never Speak

Summary

Podcast Summary: "Never Speak" – The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly

Release Date: February 12, 2025

In the episode titled "Never Speak," hosts Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly engage in their signature candid and humorous discourse, delving into a myriad of topics ranging from celebrity antics and award show controversies to personal anecdotes and critiques of contemporary pop culture. This detailed summary encapsulates the key discussions, insights, and comedic exchanges that unfolded throughout the episode.

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1. Celebrity Appearances and Fashion at the Grammys

Big Jay and Robert kick off their conversation by dissecting the unconventional and often controversial fashion choices made by celebrities at high-profile events like the Grammys.

• Beyoncé's Best Country Album Win: The duo express surprise and skepticism over Beyoncé winning the Best Country Album category.

  Big Jay [40:55]: "Beyoncé. I mean, that is just a..."

  Robert Kelly [40:58]: "It's country album."

• Jay Z's Hairstyle Critique: They criticize Jay Z's new hairstyle, comparing it unfavorably to iconic characters.

  Robert Kelly [41:12]: "His look is awful."

  Big Jay [41:17]: "What the. Is he doing?"

2. Critique of Lenny Kravitz and Rockstar Image

The hosts delve into Lenny Kravitz's evolving appearance and his attempts to maintain a rockstar image.

• Lenny's Fashion Choices:

  Big Jay [10:35]: "He looks like Daft Punk's bass player."

  Robert Kelly [10:36]: "He does look like Daft Punk's bass player."

• Workouts and Authenticity:

  Big Jay [10:10]: "He works out in cowboy boots and leather pants."

  Robert Kelly [10:46]: "I hate it. It bugs me that he's working out in cowboy boots and leather pants."

3. Jason Momoa's Changing Appearance

Jason Momoa's transformation over the years becomes a focal point of their discussion, with emphasis on his roles and physical changes.

• From Aquaman to Present:

  Big Jay [4:50]: "He's got a belly now, dude."

  Robert Kelly [5:11]: "He looks amazing at his age."

• Concerns Over Aging:

  Big Jay [7:06]: "He lost his hair. He's bald. That always sucks when you..."

  Robert Kelly [7:01]: "I think the guy has abs. Like, he looks good for his age."

4. New Country Artists at the Grammys: Lainey Wilson and Teddy Swims

The conversation shifts to emerging artists in the country music scene, highlighting their performances and industry reception.

• Lainey Wilson's Nomination:

  High Five Casino Announcer [44:30]: "Remember the girl who was the musician at the end of Yellowstone?"

  Big Jay [44:36]: "Lainey Wilson."

• Teddy Swims' Performance:

  Robert Kelly [47:35]: "He's a singer, one of the new artists."

  Big Jay [47:54]: "He is doing great."

5. Mocking Award Show Performances and Outfits

Big Jay and Robert offer their unfiltered opinions on various performances and outfits observed during award shows, often laced with humor and sarcasm.

• Christine's Controversial Outfit:

  High Five Casino Announcer [25:11]: "You're seeing nip in this one."

  Big Jay [26:24]: "Does she have pussy tape? That's the question."

• Will Smith and Family Critique:

  High Five Casino Announcer [53:08]: "He wears a castle hat on."

  Big Jay [53:09]: "I'd be like, what are you doing?"

6. Personal Anecdotes and Family Humor

The hosts intersperse their commentary with personal stories and humorous takes on family dynamics, adding a relatable and entertaining layer to the discussion.

• Stories About Uncle Mark and Family Behavior:

  High Five Casino Announcer [17:38]: "Uncle Mark was a junkie for a lot of his life."

  Big Jay [18:24]: "They would have fucking pulled so much."

• Mom's Partying Stories:

  High Five Casino Announcer [18:44]: "We should have a 'Who's Mom Was a Bigger Whore' contest."

  Big Jay [19:15]: "They were totally in on it together."

7. General Critique of Current Pop Culture and Celebrity Behavior

Throughout the episode, Big Jay and Robert maintain a critical stance towards contemporary pop culture, frequently questioning the authenticity and motivations behind celebrity actions and industry trends.

• Authenticity in Music and Awards:

  High Five Casino Announcer [46:24]: "Don't believe either of them. It doesn't make sense."

  Big Jay [46:43]: "They gave it to Beyoncé. And why is Jay Z starting to look like an avatar?"

• Concerns Over Immigrant Representation and Stereotypes:

  High Five Casino Announcer [43:12]: "She changed the words a bit, like, 'Please don't take my N word.'"

  Big Jay [44:48]: "I love country. I don't know."

8. Conclusion and Takeaways

As the episode wraps up, Big Jay and Robert reflect on the discussed topics, emphasizing their desire for authenticity and meaningful content in entertainment. Their lighthearted yet poignant observations encourage listeners to critically engage with the media they consume.

• Final Thoughts on Award Shows:

  High Five Casino Announcer [45:35]: "Incredible how they just give it to her."

  Big Jay [52:18]: "Because of this, this is why God lit that town on fire."

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Notable Quotes:

• Big Jay [07:30]: "Do you know who figured this out and kept it hip hop? Oh, Method Man."

• Robert Kelly [10:36]: "He does look like Daft Punk's bass player."

• Big Jay [26:12]: "Say it like you mean it."

• High Five Casino Announcer [25:53]: "Mission accomplished."

• Robert Kelly [43:58]: "She's country, but she's country in the way."

---

Key Insights:

• Skepticism Towards Award Categories: The hosts question the appropriateness of certain award categories and nominations, highlighting perceived inconsistencies in the entertainment industry.

• Fashion as a Reflection of Authenticity: There's a recurring theme that the hosts associate authentic artistry with genuine fashion choices, critiquing what they perceive as forced or inauthentic styles.

• Impact of Aging on Celebrity Image: Big Jay and Robert discuss how aging affects a celebrity's public image, often lamenting the loss of iconic looks and styles.

• Importance of Authentic Performances: The hosts emphasize the value they place on authentic and high-energy performances, critiquing those they deem lackluster or poorly executed.

---

Conclusion:

In "Never Speak," Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly deliver a blend of sharp critique and humorous banter, offering listeners an unfiltered look at the current state of celebrity culture and award show dynamics. Through their engaging conversation, they encourage a discerning approach to entertainment, all while maintaining the entertaining and candid ethos that defines The Bonfire.

Transcript

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[Big J. Okerson]

Okerson and Robert Kelly.

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[Big J. Okerson]

I don't want to like that, but I like it. I really wanted to not like slap. It slaps.

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Oh, it's just a term people say.

[Big J. Okerson]

I know, but we're in a 50, so I'm in my. I shouldn't like that, but I really do. I couldn't use that. If I use that, people make fun of me.

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It slaps. No, it works.

[Big J. Okerson]

If I said that in front of dawn, she'd give me. She'd roll her eyes.

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She's a dork. Doesn't understand you.

[Big J. Okerson]

She's a dork. Her.

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So I thought this was like a Fred.

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It sounds like it's gonna be a Fred Dursti type guy. Yeah, listen to his voice.

[Big J. Okerson]

When hey, bartender.

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Hit me with another.

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I just about had to kill this brother right now. Bring up the video.

[Big J. Okerson]

No. Get the. No way.

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Take it to the sheets. Take it to the GR your chose me. Oh, dude, they censored it.

[Big J. Okerson]

But he does have a lot of in his mouth.

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Oh, listen. The guy hangs dangerously within with a dangerous amount of white people.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, he has a lot of. A lot of piercings all over his face of.

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But the guy's most guy.

[Big J. Okerson]

Black, white guy, sad childhood.

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Listen, it's as cool black as the guy who went psychosomatic insane. Doesn't it make it cooler, though? That he's black.

[Big J. Okerson]

It does make it cooler. Why is Bobby Lee in this video?

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That was a young Bobby Lee. He was open to the gigs.

[Big J. Okerson]

That's in Tijuana.

[Robert Kelly]

He definitely bangs a lot of white dude.

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This guy had to be scraping up off the floor constantly. I mean, the time this came out, if you were a girl that was into this guy. Yeah, he's shredded skinny. He's like a skinny shredded.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, yeah. He's dressed like the crow.

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He's dressed like the crow.

[Big J. Okerson]

I've always wanted to dress like the crow.

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Well, he's a black guy. Do it.

[Big J. Okerson]

Listen, how many cows they'd have to kill for me to dress like the crowd.

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Do you know who figured this out and kept it hip hop? Oh, Method Man. Method man was gonna figure out. Method man would put the contact, like the Marilyn Manson contact in, have half of his hair cornrowed, half of it afroed out. He did like odd strange things like this guy, like, you know, the accoutrement, the. You know, what do I call it, Christine? The accessories he's got. And that's a really fucking. It becomes a cool looking. It's a little different. People will start following the trend. Method man became like the dude, you know, he'd wear, you know, like one mark on his face or the. The way the hat was tilted and barely on his head or whatever, you know. A Method man was big on the. The do rag. Not tied, just hanging over you like a hood almost.

[Big J. Okerson]

Method man was great.

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And his.

[Big J. Okerson]

His raps were kind of way different, silly in it. Fat Albert stuff. He's really great.

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He was so good.

[Big J. Okerson]

Good references.

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But head pe. Do you have a video of them performing now? I wonder how this aged. I'd like to see head pe. He's fat, huh?

[Big J. Okerson]

He's fat and he's wearing corduroys. That's so funny. Suspenders.

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Watch. What happened with Color Me Bad. Remember that. That fat guy to come out and then he beat his friend up on stage. Yes, he fat. Remember the I want to sex you up?

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah.

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They did a performance like three to five years ago somewhere. And the main guy who was like the guy you wanted to look like when you were young. In fact, the guy you did sort of look like when you were younger. Bobby, the main guy from Color Me Bad.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah.

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He is now a big fat guy who just looks like he never left the neighborhood you met him in. And he gets mad at something. I don't know if they're doing. They're going too fast and he's too fat as his head P.E. right now. But he came out on stage and just slammed one of the other guys and coloring bait on the ground in the audience. I don't know. He's fat and angry, man.

[Big J. Okerson]

That's gonna happen on skanks.

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Oh, I'll tell you exactly why it's fat. There was. I'll tell you exactly why. There was 11 people in the audience. That's why.

[Big J. Okerson]

Wow.

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He's going through it emotionally. What's happening here?

[Robert Kelly]

Oh, hang on.

[Big J. Okerson]

I think nobody. No, that's a. That's a. That's a double X tall.

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Do you have the hey bartender song by them? Where's that at? Go to that. I want to see him do it because that's. He was so cool. It's definitely in there.

[Robert Kelly]

I think he's still in shape.

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May close it. It's not that he's maybe Jacob, but, I mean, like, look at his head. Look at his fate. Look at his head pe.

[Robert Kelly]

It's like you've always said.

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Right there. Right there.

[Big J. Okerson]

He's got big hips now, dude.

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Let's see now. He lost it.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah. He's got dad Bob. He's got dad Bob. He went from. I mean.

[Robert Kelly]

I mean, if he had that other. The original, the young body, he wouldn't be wearing a shirt.

[Big J. Okerson]

Here's the problem. He gave up drugs. He stopped doing drugs.

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He looks like he's in great shape still.

[Big J. Okerson]

Great shape.

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I'm not saying the guy's not great.

[Big J. Okerson]

Shape from me and Jay, but what he was.

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Listen to him.

[Robert Kelly]

I don't think he has a belly, though. I'm looking at it.

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I don't think he has a belly.

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It's, like, sexier. He's, like, broader. He's not so skinny.

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You don't think he looks sexier like this?

[Big J. Okerson]

Buddy, look at his face. Jay, she's with you. That's her type.

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I'm not sexy to her either.

[Big J. Okerson]

You are sexy to her. Christine, tell him.

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Tell me with soup in your mouth.

[Big J. Okerson]

Say it like you mean it.

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She doesn't. It's fine.

[Big J. Okerson]

Say it. Just say it.

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Why am I turned on? And I'm not wet.

[Big J. Okerson]

I love you.

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She said it. Turn us up. His voice has changed.

[Robert Kelly]

I think the guy has abs. Like, he looks good for his age.

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He does look good for his.

[Robert Kelly]

I don't know what your criticism is, because he's just.

[Big J. Okerson]

What? He did look like Brad Pitt in fight club was insane.

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Yeah. I don't understand what you're not understanding. I'm saying it must be Difficult. Like, you're just like, damn, dude, it's.

[Big J. Okerson]

Not the same guy that we just saw. That was insanely holy. Look like the crow. Now he looks like a scarecrow.

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Do you have them live in the 90s?

[Big J. Okerson]

You're right.

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How about that? That's a better way of saying face is aged. Yeah.

[Big J. Okerson]

And he lost his hair. He's bald. That always sucks when you.

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Yeah. His voice.

[Big J. Okerson]

Dreadlocks fall out.

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He's wearing a hat.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, yeah. Look at the back of his neck. He's got that. I'm old and the back of your neck kind of folds out front.

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Chose me. Let's get them performing in the 90s. I bet you're gonna be like, wow, dude, that was probably a fun show. This looks like it should be in the afternoon at a festival where they're clearly performing.

[Big J. Okerson]

It still looks good, though. That still looks like. If I saw them live, that would be great. I've got two.

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I'd be into it from 2000. Perfect. That'll work. Do you still have the dreads?

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Yeah.

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Okay, here we go.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, Dude. Come on, Jake.

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Come on, Jacob. You're saying crazy now.

[Big J. Okerson]

Look at this guy. Look at that hair.

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Look at that cool outfit.

[Big J. Okerson]

Oh, God, he's dressed like Yoko Ono. Dude. He looks awesome.

[Robert Kelly]

Too much.

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No living here.

[Robert Kelly]

I can't even.

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Christine's. Christine's wrong and you're wrong. He's way awesomer here.

[Big J. Okerson]

Way awesomer here.

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Way awesome. You just really hate, like, aging hot people. You can't stand it, huh? You don't like when hot people get old.

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I hate it.

[Big J. Okerson]

I don't. I don't think he's not. I don't think he's. He's fine. I'm not like, he's fine. Fine now, but it's not. It's not like that. That's exotically holy.

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This guy comes to a room and everybody wants to talk about it. Like, look at this fucking wacky motherfucker. He looks cool as shit. I'll tell you who's pulled that off for a very long time. And it still makes it work somehow, to a degree.

[Big J. Okerson]

Oh, sorry.

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Paco Kravitz.

[Big J. Okerson]

Davitel Kravitz.

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Kravitz.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yep.

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But if you get. If you get close to him, it still has to be. It's. It's. It's good. From far. Far from good. Lenny Kravitz. The smoke and mirrors clear a bit when he gets up on you, but on stage, Lenny Kravitz, you'd be like, I might as well, be watching this guy in 1997.

[Robert Kelly]

That guy's still chiseled, though. Who, Lenny Kravitz?

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Yes.

[Big J. Okerson]

He's not. There's something that happens to your body that you get a little wider and a little, little bloated.

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And he also sounds exactly the same. Lenny Kravitz, the guy from Head PE Wasn't. Hasn't been keeping his voice tuned all these years because they're a band that plays clearly at 5pm at a festival now, so it doesn't matter. He probably like put effort and he was just young. Damn, they were cool.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah.

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But yeah, you just lose that.

[Big J. Okerson]

He's pretty, pretty hot quick.

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Is that him?

[Big J. Okerson]

Is that Lenny?

[High Five Casino Announcer]

That's Lenny Kravitz, by the way. I like that he works out in stage clothes.

[Big J. Okerson]

That's fake weight. That's fake weight. That's not real weight. There's no way those are 45s. There's no way.

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Those might not be 45s. Those are rubber plates.

[Big J. Okerson]

Those are fakes. Those are fake.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

That's a fake. They're rubber plates, dude. That might be a 10 pound weight.

[Big J. Okerson]

Whatever it is. That looks like a 45 pound weight. The size of it, by the way.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

The fact that he works out. This is the blackest thing about Lenny Kravitz is that he does sports and activity in not the right clothing. It's like the guys, the black dudes used to come play basketball in Timberlands and jeans when we were younger and just take their shirt off and be better than every goddamn person out there. Oh, it infuriate the shit out.

[Big J. Okerson]

It does bug me that he's working out in cowboy boots and leather pants.

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Leather pants. God damn it.

[Big J. Okerson]

The mesh shirt I get, though.

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Jesus.

[Big J. Okerson]

Wow.

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Yeah.

[Big J. Okerson]

Is that. Is that him now?

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It's pretty. It's 20, 24.

[Big J. Okerson]

God damn it. Dude, he is great.

[Robert Kelly]

Does he make the pick? Is he the exception?

[Big J. Okerson]

I don't know what you're talking about. Nice. From far, from far. But we're far away. I mean.

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No, no, absolutely, Bobby. And I'm not saying this. When he gets close, you're going to be like, you can't do better than that at his age for sure. But you're still gonna see the skin here. It's a little Rick Flairy where the tit meets and stuff. Yeah. By the way, you can't be better than this at this age. He looks amazing. No, he does. You're wrong. I'm saying he just. No matter what his skin is 60.

[Big J. Okerson]

It'S like he doesn't drink water at all.

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Yeah. He looks unbelievable.

[Big J. Okerson]

I don't even know what the fuck is.

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There is nothing I could possibly suck his stomach. Yeah. He looks fucking unreal.

[Big J. Okerson]

God damn it. I've never been that. Look at that walk. I've always wanted to crisscross my knees as I walk.

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I know also how cool is it that he grew the dreads back and then. So it's got that cool thing going again now.

[Big J. Okerson]

God damn it. Look, he's just wearing a belt buckle and jeans. Yeah, it's my dream.

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I don't know if you remember that time that he squatted down and his dick busted out of his pants and slapped the floor.

[Big J. Okerson]

I do remember that. I've never slapped his dick.

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Looked like the thing. Did you ever get those in the quarter machines when you were younger? It was like a. It was like a jelly hand with a thing on it. And you could put something on the floor and you could slap it on the floor and it would pick it up. His dick did that with his set list. His dick hit the floor and then when he came up, his set list was attached to it. He's like, oh, no. How do I know what to play next?

[Robert Kelly]

Wearing those low rise jeans that women wear.

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These are women's jeans for sure. I assure you. I 100% promise you they're women's jeans.

[Robert Kelly]

See the top of his penis?

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Well, you definitely would see his dick hair if you didn't shave it off like a bitch. No, Lenny Kravitz is a pretty big exception to the rule, for sure.

[Big J. Okerson]

God damn it. I bet his hair smells like, though.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Oh, yeah, absolutely.

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No, I'm sure he gets all the, like, detox treatments.

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No.

[Big J. Okerson]

You think so?

[High Five Casino Announcer]

No.

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100.

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I bet his balls smell like all the time. This guy's all natural.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, his ball's gonna smell from just.

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He works out in leather. Yeah, his balls stink.

[Big J. Okerson]

Smell like snake shit.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Absolutely.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah. We gotta take away something from him.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Yeah. Lisa Bonet. I'll tell you what. She better hope to God that what's his name hangs on like that. Aquaman.

[Robert Kelly]

He didn't.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

He's not.

[Big J. Okerson]

What do you mean?

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Aquaman already?

[Robert Kelly]

Jason, my moa.

[Big J. Okerson]

Oh, he's. He's. No, no, no way, dude.

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What do you mean? That was the craziest interaction I've ever had with you, James.

[Robert Kelly]

Dude, don't argue with me here.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Bring up fat Momoa. Christine.

[Big J. Okerson]

He's not fat.

[Robert Kelly]

I didn't say you did. You does not look like Aquaman now. No, he's got a Little Hawaiian belly.

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Now maybe he's playing a new role.

[Big J. Okerson]

I don't know, dude, he still looks good.

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Is he ever gonna be Lobo?

[Big J. Okerson]

Oh, wait a minute.

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There's a calendar.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, not this year.

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It is 2025.

[Big J. Okerson]

Actually, it's 2025. I don't care.

[Robert Kelly]

What's a calendar? If the pictures are old, what difference is it?

[High Five Casino Announcer]

What are we looking for? Because that's a character in a movie.

[Robert Kelly]

I. I know what I saw.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Okay, you have to stop yelling at us and start telling us what to look up.

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Did you see this?

[Robert Kelly]

Because this, first of all, even the latest Aquaman movie.

[Big J. Okerson]

I kind of like that he's yelling. He's really passionate about this.

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I saw what the. I saw. Well, just tell us what it is.

[Big J. Okerson]

You weren't there, guys.

[Robert Kelly]

You think I'm taking notes on this?

[Big J. Okerson]

I was there. I was there, man. I was alone in my apartment on Friday night.

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You weren't there.

[Robert Kelly]

But he's. He said I don't work out unless I'm being paid millions to do it. But on Aquaman 2, he was wearing a full shirt. He didn't show his shirt.

[Big J. Okerson]

I do the same thing, though. I don't work out unless I get paid fully to do it. That's why I've been like this.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

That's why Bobby's been jiggaloing.

[Big J. Okerson]

I've been jiggalo.

[Robert Kelly]

He's not ripped in Aquaman 2.

[Big J. Okerson]

Is that a new Aqua.

[Robert Kelly]

No, that's the first.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

That's Aquaman 2, actually.

[Big J. Okerson]

No, up top in the middle is Aquaman 3.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Yeah.

[Big J. Okerson]

Is that fake?

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No, no. They need something for Timothy Chalamet to do. It is five seconds of downtime. I've never liked a person less for no Fault of his own. Seems like a lovely kid.

[Big J. Okerson]

He really isn't a lot of shit.

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I can't anymore with this fucking rat fate. I get it. Great.

[Big J. Okerson]

You know what I hate? I hate when they. They get me with the stupid fake trailer like Heat. Heat two.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Yeah.

[Big J. Okerson]

Or Godfather four.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Why do you believe these things?

[Big J. Okerson]

Because I want to.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

I know.

[Big J. Okerson]

Because I want to.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Bobby, Apologies.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

I'm going to stop going the direction I was going, acting like now, because I know a lot of times I think they're viruses when you click the thing on Facebook. Now, I know that, but how many times I've looked up, DJ Qualls is gonna play Freddy Krueger in a Rob Zombie remake of Nightmare on Elm street, and now I just know. I just Google Rob Zombie. Nightmare on Elm street. He goes the DJ Qualls poster is a fake thing. Goonies 2 is always fake.

[Big J. Okerson]

Goonies 2's happening.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

It's not.

[Big J. Okerson]

It is.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

No, it's not. And if your lawyer tells you that, he's lying to your face.

[Big J. Okerson]

My lawyer is Chunk.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Your lawyer's Chunk.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yes.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

You would know if it was happening. You're right, it's not happening.

[Big J. Okerson]

Tell you what's not happening. My fucking contract was serious, Jeff.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Get on it. You're out of your mind. Jason Momoa looks like fantastic.

[Robert Kelly]

No.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Oh, is there a poster, Bobby, where he's at now?

[Robert Kelly]

So it's not ripped. It's not what you think.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

How old is he, Jacob?

[Whole Foods Market Announcer]

You think that's a bad looking guy now?

[Robert Kelly]

No, I don't. I'm saying, they're saying compared to that. He's saying compared to his best. So obviously he still looks great, but.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Well, how old is he? How old is he?

[Robert Kelly]

I think he's in his mid or late 40s.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Oh, that's it. Well then Lenny Kravitz is doing better.

[Big J. Okerson]

Technically they had the Godfather 4 with Stallone. I was like, yeah, stop.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Stop doing it to yourself.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, it's bad.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

But then they hit you with the ones that are happening, that are real is the problem. Because the welcome to Derry, the IT prequel that is happening, I think there's a Crystal Lake, an actual like series of Nightmare or Friday the 13th I think is happening.

[Big J. Okerson]

Like a series, I think. Well, that's cool.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

That's the problem. Some of these news things are real. I don't believe them. Now almost anytime.

[Big J. Okerson]

That's Jason. Jason was a kid drowned in the lake.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Yes.

[Big J. Okerson]

Mother was killing everybody.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Just the first one.

[Big J. Okerson]

But Jason was real at the end. Comes out of the lake, winds up killing people in the number two.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

My uncle Mark, who just died, by the way, was a drug addict.

[Big J. Okerson]

I'm sorry.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

He's sorry. Uncle Mark. Uncle Mark was a. Rest his soul.

[Big J. Okerson]

God rest his soul. Was he Catholic?

[High Five Casino Announcer]

No, Jewish.

[Big J. Okerson]

Mazel tov, Shabbat shalom.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

He was a junkie for a lot of his life. And when he was young and an alcoholic and stuff. And he babysat me overnight one night at his house and just before we went to bed, his house was just like that of a person who was on drugs before he had a kid himself. Even. So the house was like nasty indoors, smoking walls like brown drips. The kitchen, almost unusable, was a nasty place. And I was staying at his house and my mom might have been banging my Uncle Tommy. I don't know.

[Big J. Okerson]

You know how Your mom is.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

She banged my father's stepbrother for a little while. And I think this was that time.

[Big J. Okerson]

She liked to have fun back in the day.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

The lady party. Do not sit. Terry. Terry got down. No doubt Terry liked the part. Remember that picture of her side tit? Yeah, for the mom pictures. Won our goddamn contest.

[Big J. Okerson]

My mom liked to get down too. She had my sister when she was 15.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Yeah, your mom partied hard slut in the bush. Yeah. Me and your moms would be such great whores together.

[Big J. Okerson]

They would have fucking pulled so much.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

We should have a Whose mom was a bigger whore contest.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah. I think your mom would win just because.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Why? Thank you.

[Big J. Okerson]

Well, my. Well, you know what? I have to go back in because my mom had my. My sister 15, me 18. And then she didn't go. She wanted right into another husband.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Right.

[Big J. Okerson]

But I don't know. She might have went rogue in between there and. There is a rumor that my mom was cheating on my dad while he was in Vietnam with who?

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Was it Billy Corgan's mom?

[Big J. Okerson]

Don't know.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

That'd be awesome.

[Big J. Okerson]

That'd be great. If me and Billy Burr were all related.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

But you're not. You're not related. It just. It's all step. Because it's his. It's. Your mom and Billy Corgan's mom are the same.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

And the dads are the same.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah. Just a bunch of slut moms.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Just a bunch of fucking slut bag moms. Couldn't fucking. Not open their legs for the first celeb who comes through town. Well, this is funny. We're talking about music stuff. I wanted to tell you. You didn't watch the Grammys. It's my job on this show since its inception, I'd say is to watch all the things that you guys as adults, I assume with interests, families. Families, perhaps responsibility. Responsibilities.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yes.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Or a strange sports schedule of sports that don't really air in America for Jacob. He's like, I'll be up at 4 in the morning for highlight.

[Robert Kelly]

Definitely added a new one. What's that Crazy into it now.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

F1.

[Robert Kelly]

No. Sumo.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Sumo.

[Robert Kelly]

Watch Grand Sumo.

[Big J. Okerson]

Grand Sumo?

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J. Okerson]

What's grand sumo? Is that better than regular?

[High Five Casino Announcer]

I'll tell you what. It's not pussy. It's definitely not getting close.

[Robert Kelly]

I follow sumo stable now.

[Big J. Okerson]

Do you have to buy what?

[Robert Kelly]

That's what they call a team.

[Big J. Okerson]

Oh, it's a stable.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J. Okerson]

Because they're like cattle stable of fat Japs.

[Robert Kelly]

Sumo wrestlers.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Yeah.

[Big J. Okerson]

And does they have a name? The stable have A name like a basketball team.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Please say it's the Fat Chaps.

[Robert Kelly]

No, no, it's not like that. It's kind of like the town or province.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

The Chubby Ding Dongs.

[Robert Kelly]

They're great. I watch them train, then I watch the Grand Sumo. And you watch them eat. If you watch sumo, food follows my stable.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Okay.

[Robert Kelly]

And you just watch them eat for an hour before train and then eat for 45 minutes before the fight. Well, Grand Sumo, there's six matches per year. Yeah, six tournaments throughout the year. So every other month they're. They're in a tournament. And I just watched the Jap. The January one.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

That Jap.

[Big J. Okerson]

Did you say Jap?

[High Five Casino Announcer]

You did?

[Robert Kelly]

No, the Japular. I was gonna say January Fat Chat. So I follow Nabatami. He's my favorite fetcher from the stable.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Oh, wait, are we talking about Jewish American Princesses? I wasn't being racist. Sorry, I thought we were talking about Jewish American princesses. It is my job on the show to watch the pop culture things you guys might not be bothered with. So I can, one, keep my finger on the pulse, keep my reference game strong, know what's going on in the world, and also shit on things I do not enjoy, which is a lot. I do like to be a crotchety old man when I watch these award shows. I watch the Grammys. Now, I will say this. I don't know if I'm coming full circle, if things are coming around, or if I'm getting a little more confidence in music. Swinging back a little more to maybe some instruments again and bands, some of the new people that came out. Did you watch it at all, though?

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, I flipped back and forth. I saw some of it.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

The new artists particularly, they had all of the new artists perform.

[Big J. Okerson]

I'm so old, I didn't know it was on.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

That's. I didn't know it was on till the day before.

[Big J. Okerson]

I watched back to back to back episodes of the Resident.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Okay.

[Big J. Okerson]

And had a great night.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

That's fantastic. Listen, I like to take in a live thing and see if anything wacky happens. To keep in mind, I wish I knew, you know, I got to see the Chris Rock Slap happen. Like, there, watched it, saw it happen. It was crazy, you know? So it's like, I like to see if anything wacky is going to happen. Not too much wacky, am I right? Christine on the Grammys? But the new artists that performed, I think too, as they would keep performing, I would be like, this pun should win. Except for the very first. I felt terrible for which is maybe the band I would like the most in the category and find out what they're called. Christine, the first band that performed in the new music, best new song or band category. It was like a very low, like guy and girl and just a drummer and they just kind of like whisper into the microphone. Like it's, it's. It's like rock. I thought indie rock sort of stuff. I forget what they're called.

[Big J. Okerson]

To back up just a little bit though. There was a little weird shit that happened on the red carpet. What's his name?

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Oh, Kanye.

[Big J. Okerson]

Kanye showed up with his naked wife.

[Robert Kelly]

Pig.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Excuse me. Jacob.

[Big J. Okerson]

Jesus Christ, Jacob.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Slow down, dog.

[Big J. Okerson]

I mean, wow.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Slow down. She may have legitimately a perfect body. Her face looks like young Kyle McLaughlin to me. I got. Her head could be cut off. That body is unreal.

[Big J. Okerson]

But he. He showed up to just do what he did.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Yeah.

[Big J. Okerson]

And then they kicked him out.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

He wasn't invited.

[Whole Foods Market Announcer]

Yeah, that's a lie.

[Robert Kelly]

I think he left.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Oh, no, he wasn't kicked out. But I don't think he went to the event.

[Robert Kelly]

He went to the red carpet and got right back in the car.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, I heard they kicked him out. I heard they were like.

[Whole Foods Market Announcer]

Yeah, but that was fake.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

That's fake.

[Big J. Okerson]

So he just went down. Get the publicity.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Yep.

[Big J. Okerson]

And get the fuck out.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

And then the after party, she was wearing a thong. She came up.

[Big J. Okerson]

Okay, so she shows up. This is him on the red carpet now.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Stupid.

[Big J. Okerson]

And then she turns around and takes off. She has a beautiful fur coat. Christine, you look great in that. The coat. You look great in that coat. You don't like that coat?

[Whole Foods Market Announcer]

No, I do like that coat.

[Big J. Okerson]

What happened?

[Whole Foods Market Announcer]

It just cut before we wanted to cut.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Yeah, well, it's social media. They're not gonna show on social media. But she. Yeah, her bo. I mean, just completely see through outfit or pussy and everything, I think.

[Big J. Okerson]

What do you think though? Like, do you think this is a big. Like they're in on this together? Like he. He's like, you sure you want to do this? You gotta make sure that you wanna do. I don't want you to do anything that you don't wanna do. And she's like, I got it, relax.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Listen, I think she's like, why not get the publicity? Christine, can you zoom in? Are we seeing pussy lip there?

[Big J. Okerson]

You're seeing nip in this one.

[Whole Foods Market Announcer]

This is so.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

It's a. Christine, can you zoom in a lot more? And let's see if this is.

[Robert Kelly]

Enhance that quadrant.

[Big J. Okerson]

Christine, there's something over It.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Well, that's what I'm saying. She might have a piece of tape or something over it, which will change things for me.

[Big J. Okerson]

Still not as good as Tony Kravitz's stomach.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

It.

[Big J. Okerson]

Also, FYI, you're not wrong. Not even close.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

You're.

[Big J. Okerson]

This chubby has got nothing on. Do not call her chubby, okay?

[High Five Casino Announcer]

And let me tell you something. If I'm seeing what I think I'm seeing, her pussy lip on the. Our left. Her right takes up much more space than the. The left pussy lip does. Do you see where it's like. It's almost like her pussy lips are kissing her left thigh.

[Big J. Okerson]

I'm pretty sure that she has something over. You're saying she has a lopsided vagina?

[Robert Kelly]

I think that's a shadow.

[Big J. Okerson]

I think she has.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Well, then she has no pussy lips.

[Big J. Okerson]

I think she has something over her vagina.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Christine, can you push in, please, on that?

[Big J. Okerson]

Plus, I think there's something over it. I don't think there's. Damn it.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

All right, we'll find another one. Let's see. There's something. Let's look at the bottom of this. Is her pussy lips out?

[Big J. Okerson]

I don't know. They might have fogged it out on this.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

It's very possible. Yeah, but I think that's. I think what we're seeing is through the mesh of that. Her.

[Big J. Okerson]

Her nipples, her silver dollar pancake nips are out. Yeah, they go perfectly with her breasts. Do you think those are fake breasts? Correct.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

I don't know. I don't know. Probably. I mean, there's probably some work done on them. I don't know if she has, like, fake tit shit in them. Her hands.

[Big J. Okerson]

Robot hands.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

AI. She's AI, hands off.

[Robert Kelly]

Like a robot. You're right. I mean, she's. No facial expression.

[Big J. Okerson]

What if she was a robot? What if she was a gift from Elon?

[High Five Casino Announcer]

That'd be great.

[Big J. Okerson]

And she's just programmed to do this weird with him.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

God, that would be hot.

[Big J. Okerson]

And he's dumpy. He's. He's. He's. You know what I mean?

[High Five Casino Announcer]

He's a frump now. Yeah, he's got dad Bob. You know, it's funny, though. Kanye was never like, like in shape guy ever. That was never his jam, you know? I mean, he was never, like, known for that. You know, all those guys, like 50 Cent and everything. And even like the skinny ones, like Ja Rule and those guys would all take their shirts out. Kanye west was never a shirt off guy.

[Big J. Okerson]

There you go. Oh, there it is. Nope, that's it. You're right. It's over. Her smile is to the left.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Thank you.

[Big J. Okerson]

You're welcome.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Thank you, guys. Thanks for agreeing with me.

[Big J. Okerson]

To the left.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

I appreciate. Or. Or just so you realize also now that I'm looking close again, I'm seeing a little arc above her pussy that might be the very beginning of flesh colored tape that goes from a little above her pussy to her asshole perhaps.

[Big J. Okerson]

So you mean it might be even. The, the. The line might be even. But it might be like. Like when she's like you're robbing a bank and you over it just mushed over to one side.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Well, I don't know if she has a nylon over it. I'm seeing if. I think there's something covering it all. I believe it's something that's stuck to her body like tape that has gone across. And I see. Christine, can you put the arrow on that little line that goes across? No, no, no, no, no. Up. The line that goes across. It's up and down. Yes, you were on it there. No, no, no, Right there. Down there? Nope. Up. Yes, yes, yes. Is that the outline of some tape or something that goes.

[Big J. Okerson]

Get nervous. Are you guys going to fight like mom and dad? Up, down. No, because this looks like a little.

[Whole Foods Market Announcer]

Separation here as well. But it does look like she has some like, she doesn't have underwear, but she probably does have some sort of tape.

[Robert Kelly]

Is that the words where her tan line would be look? Because she probably wears string.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Oh, I think this girl tans naked. If my guess would be with a little bit of tape over pussy. Pussy tape or no pussy tape? That's the question, I guess. Right?

[Big J. Okerson]

My question is this though.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Yes.

[Big J. Okerson]

What is. What is this something he came up with and like, I want to do this.

[Whole Foods Market Announcer]

Well, they've been doing this their entire relationship.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

I mean, she like sucked him off on a boat. There was pictures of that and stuff.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, but this is. This is a. That is. This is a full publicity stunt.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

100.

[Whole Foods Market Announcer]

Well, there was something she did where she wore like a bandage and that was it.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, that's because he hit her in the face.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

That was legit. Bandage. I would be naked. But she's hot. Who cares?

[Big J. Okerson]

Let me see your face again. You think her face is nuts.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

I just think it's whatever.

[Big J. Okerson]

Let me see her face.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Doesn't really. It's like, she's pretty for sure.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah. She's irregular.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

It's. No, she's not regular for sure. She's pretty, but she's like, she has, like, a stern face. Looks like a hair.

[Whole Foods Market Announcer]

It softens it up.

[Big J. Okerson]

What's that? What's that song? Simply Irresistible? That. That head.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

That actually makes her look scuzzier in some weird way. Yeah. I mean, her body is unfucked. Doesn't matter what you think about her head.

[Whole Foods Market Announcer]

She also was like. She was an architect for his company.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Really?

[Whole Foods Market Announcer]

She's not even, like a stripper or something.

[Big J. Okerson]

Ditzy chick.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

So he just makes her do this.

[Big J. Okerson]

So do you think. But my problem is, do you think she's in on it?

[Whole Foods Market Announcer]

Do you think she has to be? She probably wants to be famous.

[Big J. Okerson]

You think she's like, you know what we should do? I'll. I'll get naked. I'll act like an idiot. I'll get out of the thing, and you just tell me to turn around. I'll take it off. You think they're laughing, dude, that was crazy. Like, they're totally in on.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Land off their lad. I think he's like. I think he's more of a lunatic than that. So I think he was like, okay, first part of the plan in place. It's like. I don't know if it's like, how funny was that?

[Whole Foods Market Announcer]

But I don't know if she's coming up with the ideas. But I think she's doing it because she wants to be known. Why else would you do.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Yeah, once.

[Big J. Okerson]

And also, she's not even talking. She's just like a dog.

[Whole Foods Market Announcer]

She's not allowed to talk.

[Big J. Okerson]

What?

[Whole Foods Market Announcer]

That's, like, part of the agreement. She can't, like, speak publicly.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Wow.

[Big J. Okerson]

How do we get that?

[High Five Casino Announcer]

I could fire Christine.

[Big J. Okerson]

No, I mean, on the show. We have a talk, but I'm just saying out front, when we're hanging out.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Oh, when she comes out talking.

[Big J. Okerson]

Look what I got. I got half a sandwich.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

You gotta hear stories about half a sandwich?

[Big J. Okerson]

I got half a sandwich.

[Whole Foods Market Announcer]

You asked.

[Big J. Okerson]

I'm getting. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I was kidding. See, right now, shut up. Just shut the up.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Why are you not shutting the.

[Big J. Okerson]

Kanye is on something.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Christine, will you sign this piece of paper for me?

[Whole Foods Market Announcer]

There's not a lot of pictures of the uncensored outfit.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

That's fine.

[Whole Foods Market Announcer]

I had a video of it.

[Big J. Okerson]

Is there her talking? Can we, like. Is there.

[Whole Foods Market Announcer]

She's not allowed to talk, Bobby.

[Big J. Okerson]

No. Before she.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

In her life.

[Big J. Okerson]

Before she met her.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

God, I'd like to hear how she.

[Big J. Okerson]

I would love to hear a voice.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Hollow. It's me, Bianca. Sensory. She's Australian.

[Robert Kelly]

Hey, like, I think Italy's rejected Her?

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Why?

[Big J. Okerson]

Because she's.

[Robert Kelly]

Because she. Because she blew him in broad daylight on a boat with some a hundred other boats taking pictures.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, she sucked his dick in a gondola.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

I thought it's where she. Because she refuses to let her mustache and back hair grow. I thought that's why they hated her. Nilly, you know, you're breaking the nature a pubic hair.

[Big J. Okerson]

But I must not connect.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Only your body hair go where the God wanted to go. Eh?

[Big J. Okerson]

Your hair must go to your pubic hair up with your nipple hair. What do you do? You disrespect your family.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

You shave it like you don't respect the God anything of her talking now. Do you have the Grammys up?

[Whole Foods Market Announcer]

I should, but let me get into Paramount. Plus, it was an issue.

[Big J. Okerson]

She's trying. She's doing her best.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

You're talking to yourself right now because you want to put her face on the glass so bad. For days now, I'll add, this is the third day in a row, second day, third night that you've wanted Christine. You'd like to see her get mushed.

[Big J. Okerson]

But not by me.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

No, no, no, no, no.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, by you.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

No, right, exactly. It's the same thing. I have never even thought about raising a hand to Christine. But I've often wished that when she left the house that a woman would come and put. I mean, a real hospital beating on her. Not like a night overnight in the hospital, but like, you should go get checked. Get checked out.

[Whole Foods Market Announcer]

Okay, I have it. Let me get to the. You want to go to the new people, right?

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Yes, the new performers. So. Well, first I want to show this business back to the Grammys. I'm sorry, this.

[Big J. Okerson]

It doesn't make sense. This stupid stuff. They're just blank, staring into the abyss.

[Robert Kelly]

Bobby, if you would have told me that. That she was a robot at a tech convention, if they weren't at the Grammys, I would have said, sure, I believe you. And she's that robotic looking.

[Big J. Okerson]

Her nipples are covered with something too. She's not fully naked.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

No, her nipples are uncovered. That's just the mesh of that outfit is like.

[Big J. Okerson]

I think. No, I think that left nipple, there's something covering it because it goes on her stomach and you can see her belly button go up to her breast. And look at her go up to her shoulder. No, I mean, well, there's a.

[Whole Foods Market Announcer]

You can see the dress. You see the full dress. So there is.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

She's wearing a mesh dress over the whole thing.

[Whole Foods Market Announcer]

Yeah.

[Big J. Okerson]

So you think your nipples.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Do you think she Are you just not. Did you think she was naked? Naked?

[Big J. Okerson]

No.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Okay. I was gonna say, yeah, she's in.

[Big J. Okerson]

I just think she put something like another thing over her nipples.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

She might have put some makeup to like soften them so it blends more with the color. I don't know how dark her nipples are.

[Big J. Okerson]

Normally I would.

[High Five Casino Announcer]

Those are. Those are very pale nipples.

[Big J. Okerson]

I'll say those are pale nipples.

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He literally. Jay Z's hair looks like the green lady who dances around in front of Jabba the Hutt at the cantina. It looks like his hair is made out of his head. Like it's just coming off of his head.

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The comedy awards didn't even acknowledge her album.

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I mean, dude, what the. Who are the other people up for? Up for best country album.

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Pretty sure they were country.

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Another black guy Was it. Was he up for the country? Was he up for the album? No, he was up for songs, actually. It might not be, but there's a black guy. Shaboozi, now is also a country black guy who I don't believe either. I don't believe him. I don't know. I'm not buying Beyonce's thing. I don't buy. I don't believe either of them. It doesn't make sense. Also, though, who was nominated, and I was pleased to find out that she was a real musician is the girl with the cute face, fat ass. Sounds like every country western girl you've ever heard in your life.

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Lainey who?

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Remember the girl who was the musician at the. At the end of Yellowstone? The guy, like, left with her, and she's like, I'm a junior. She's real. Yeah. And she was nominated for a bunch of shit. Yeah, she's country, but she's country in the way. I don't like.

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She looks good. She lost a little weight.

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I guess it's a different country. I mean, you have country, which is the Country Music Awards, right? That's country. And then you have this, which is, who gives a fuck?

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He got famous, they said, from doing covers on social media.

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These kids didn't work at fucking Burger King ever. Willow Smith was like when she was a kid. They made her make music. Right away. He. They shoved him in movies right away. Jaden Smith shoved in the movies, which.

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I'm just saying it wasn't as bad as it could have been. And the space one was pretty good.

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That's probably solid gold around his neck.

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He has to live his whole life knowing he'll never be as good as his father. He'll never be as loved, he'll never be as good.

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He like, supports him. And he had like a million followers or something. And Will Smith put out a video like, congratulating him. Like, he doesn't give a.

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Well, if Mike, if your kid was going, he was like, yo, what are you wearing to the Grammys? And he showed up with a castle hat. Would you. I'd be like, like, Isabella Castle.

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She wear a castle hat?

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Christine, can you play?

[Big J. Okerson]

I love that you said there was no drama.

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That wasn't drama. He's dressed like that.

[Big J. Okerson]

There's a guy with a hat. There's a naked chick with a slave. I mean, there's crazy going on in this. Grammys.

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It's cued to the new artist.

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Good. Yes. So I want you to play. This is the band I felt bad for because this was the first new artist they played is before the. They announced who won. They let them all perform.

[Big J. Okerson]

Can I ask you a question?

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[Big J. Okerson]

Are you a bangs out? Cause you're trying to look cute.

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Do I have bangs out?

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, you do. And I'm just wondering if it's intentional. Are you playing with me right now or is this just an accidental cute thing?

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[Big J. Okerson]

All right, dude. Because fuck it. It's driving me nuts. You're so adorable right now. Holy shit. No, no, don't. Don't you do it. Don't you dare do it. Wow, you look cute.

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You're a real cutie patootie.

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Thank you, Jacob. This band I felt terrible for because the energy of this band is low. It's cool. I. I said this might be the music that I would like look into the most of this good rock. But. But this is not. Look at the performance. And no one cares. They just come back from commercial break and they're playing. By the way, no introduction. No introduction. They say afterwards like that. So and so one of the new. Oh, there you go. Cronin sky. What cr. Cr.

[Big J. Okerson]

Did you say crabing crab McGraw.

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No. That's crazy.

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We were just laughing at the energy of this.

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We're like, that was a joke. It reminded me when Peter. When Peter and Lois both smoked pot. And then they thought they played like this, but they were just screaming at.

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Old microphone in the background.

[Big J. Okerson]

This looks like something Nick Mullen would do if it was a joke.

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Yeah, yeah. But I listen. Time and a place. This music will hit me. I'm certain of it.

[Robert Kelly]

A small club.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah.

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Yes. Yes. I said these guys were playing in the back of like a lounge. I'm like, band's pretty cool. I like this now show. Who's the next new art was the next new Artist. They showed the kid. I don't know this guy's name. Bunghole Boonie. He's.

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Oh, yeah, it is here.

[Big J. Okerson]

He.

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I mean, maybe he's my. He might be my boy crush.

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Well, I didn't know this, but how was.

[Big J. Okerson]

Can I ask a question real quick? How was this unfunny fool?

[Robert Kelly]

This monologue was so boring.

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Oh, he was unfunny.

[Big J. Okerson]

I mean, I don't think I've ever heard him say something funny in my life.

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No, that's not his job, is it?

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, he's a stand up comedian.

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Oh, Jesus.

[Big J. Okerson]

He hosted a show called the Daily show, which is a comedy news show. He tours the country doing stand up.

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Oh, well, people's behavior with Jon Stewart. I thought it was the only news source.

[Big J. Okerson]

Okay, is JLO still in the music industry?

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She may have produced this guy or something. Or is she part of American Idol or something? Because she, by the way, she looks great.

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She does not. Benson Boone, you know who fell off? Cameron Diaz.

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Oh, yeah.

[Big J. Okerson]

Did you see her new movie with Jamie Foxx?

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Buddy. Blondes, they just age like fucking loose fruit.

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Buddy, buddy. Her new movie, Jamie Foxx on Netflix.

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Yeah.

[Big J. Okerson]

Which I did watch.

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No one gives a anymore.

[Big J. Okerson]

She looks. Wow. It's like you can't stop looking at her. I feel bad because she was smoking.

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So this. What's his name?

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Benson.

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Benson Boone.

[Big J. Okerson]

Look at. Look at. Look at Todd Glass and Jim Gaffigan over there.

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Oh, yeah. Well, Nikki Glazer's over there, too. And Nikki Glazer and Heidi Klum get involved in this.

[Big J. Okerson]

I'm gonna say Nikki Glaze is looking all right.

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Looks good here. Yeah, for sure.

[Big J. Okerson]

Well, with whatever work she had done, that lady right behind JLo is a hunk of garbage.

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Oh, yeah. She's just boardroom trash.

[Big J. Okerson]

Looks like my Aunt Peggy.

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So this guy, Benson Boone, he won American Idol back.

[Big J. Okerson]

I love my aunt Peggy.

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And what else?

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He's not. It's not coming up. These gay. He's 22 years old, but he's gay. 2002.

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Well, he has no. He might not know he's got yet. This may be the most talented person I've ever seen in my entire life on so many levels. What this guy does, I. He didn't win because they just gave it to the girl.

[Big J. Okerson]

They gave it to Beyonce.

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No, they gave it to the girl who opens for Taylor Swift. That's it. They just gave it her.

[Robert Kelly]

Carpenter.

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Yeah. Sabrina Carpenter. Yeah, they just gave it to her blindly. But this guy. But can you imagine if you're gonna hurry up. Let's take a break now. There's no break.

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First take a break. Take a break. We're gonna pay the bills, Jay. We gotta pay the bills.

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We're gonna.

[Big J. Okerson]

We'll do with. We have a guest coming in, our pal, Steven Singer. He's here. Valentine's Day's coming up.

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I do want to ask Steven if he's hoping the Eagles lose so he doesn't have to protect his shop like a Korean.

[Big J. Okerson]

Whoa, whoa.

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Like a fat Jap.

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We'll be right back.

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