Old Edition

Summary

Podcast Summary: "Old Edition" - The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly
Release Date: March 7, 2025
Host/Author: SiriusXM
Duration: Approximately 60 minutes

---

1. Introduction and Musical Banter (00:57 - 03:13)

The episode kicks off with Bobby Kelly and Big Jay Oakerson engaging in their trademark witty banter. The hosts discuss a song selection dilemma involving DJ Lou, who introduces a remix of "Paid in Full." This segment sets the tone for the episode, blending humor with casual conversations about music.

Notable Quote:
Bobby Kelly [00:57]: "DJ Lou, you picked this song. So I assume you were seduced in a jungle this weekend or something?"

2. Deep Dive into Fashion: The Thumb Hole Trend (03:13 - 10:02)

A significant portion of the episode revolves around the hosts' fascination with thumb holes in hoodies. Bobby Kelly initiates a detailed discussion on the practicality and aesthetics of thumb holes, sparking a humorous debate with Big Jay. They explore the challenges of finding masculine apparel that incorporates this trendy feature, ultimately brainstorming ideas for their unique fashion line.

Notable Quotes:
Big Jay Oakerson [03:36]: "I've hidden my thumb hole love from my friends and my family and everybody for years."
Bobby Kelly [05:03]: "Formation shrug with the thumb holes... There's gyro lines all over the place."

3. Embracing the Cyberpunk Aesthetic (10:02 - 22:13)

Transitioning from casual fashion talk, Bobby and Big Jay delve into the cyberpunk style, contemplating adopting a more avant-garde look. They discuss how a cyberpunk outfit could redefine their on-stage presence and attract high-profile guests. The conversation takes a playful turn as they imagine becoming "assassins" with their new attire, blending humor with creative envisioning.

Notable Quote:
Bobby Kelly [10:01]: "Cyberpunk. You're going full cyberpunk for 2025. I love it, Jacob."

4. Family Dynamics and Cookie Conundrums (22:13 - 34:38)

The hosts shift focus to personal anecdotes, sharing stories about making cookies with their families. This segment highlights the interplay between personal life and public personas, with Bobby expressing skepticism about his family's perception of him as "one of the good ones." The humorous exchange emphasizes the challenges of balancing family expectations with individual identities.

Notable Quote:
Bobby Kelly [32:03]: "Everyone loves Ralph. Because that voice dude. Yeah, he's an angel."

5. Concert Experiences: New Edition in Las Vegas (34:38 - 52:24)

DJ Lou shares his recent experience attending a New Edition concert in Las Vegas, providing an insider's perspective on the performance and backstage antics. The discussion includes critiques of Bobby Brown's stage presence and the group's evolution over the years. The hosts reminisce about the golden era of boy bands while poking fun at the current state of New Edition's performances.

Notable Quote:
Big Jay Oakerson [51:40]: "Michael Jackson dead. He believe this shit. I still can't get over that shit. Michael Jackson dead. Bobby Brown living."

6. Humorous Interludes and Pop Culture References (52:24 - 63:37)

Throughout the episode, Bobby and Big Jay intersperse their main discussions with rapid-fire jokes and pop culture references. Topics range from MC Hammer pants nostalgia to exaggerated tales of celebrity interactions. This segment showcases their improvisational skills and ability to pivot between topics seamlessly, maintaining an engaging and entertaining flow.

Notable Quote:
Bobby Kelly [60:19]: "It's like those creeping crows trying to keep the chef out of the cookies. Welcome to our studio."

7. Product Placements and Advertisements (Skipped Sections)

The transcript includes several advertisements promoting services like LinkedIn ads, Lumify eye drops, and Amica Insurance. As per the summary guidelines, these sections are omitted to focus solely on the core content of the podcast episode.

---

Conclusion

"Old Edition" offers a blend of humor, personal stories, and cultural commentary, characteristic of Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly's dynamic hosting style. From dissecting fashion trends like thumb holes to critiquing boy band performances, the episode provides listeners with an engaging and entertaining experience. The hosts' candid discussions and quick wit make this episode a memorable addition to "The Bonfire" series, appealing to both dedicated fans and newcomers alike.

Overall Impression:
Listeners can expect a lively mix of humor, relatable anecdotes, and sharp cultural insights. Whether debating the merits of thumb holes or reminiscing about classic boy bands, Big Jay and Bobby deliver content that's both entertaining and thought-provoking.

---

Notable Quotes with Timestamps:

• Bobby Kelly [00:57]: "DJ Lou, you picked this song. So I assume you were seduced in a jungle this weekend or something?"
• Big Jay Oakerson [03:36]: "I've hidden my thumb hole love from my friends and my family and everybody for years."
• Bobby Kelly [10:01]: "Cyberpunk. You're going full cyberpunk for 2025. I love it, Jacob."
• Big Jay Oakerson [51:40]: "Michael Jackson dead. He believe this shit. I still can't get over that shit. Michael Jackson dead. Bobby Brown living."
• Bobby Kelly [60:19]: "It's like those creeping crows trying to keep the chef out of the cookies. Welcome to our studio."

---

This summary encapsulates the essence of the "Old Edition" episode, providing a comprehensive overview while highlighting key moments and humorous exchanges. Whether you're revisiting favorite segments or tuning in for the first time, this episode promises laughter and engaging conversations.

Transcript

[Bobby Kelly]

How do you make an Airbnb a vrbo? Picture a vacation rental. Now imagine that every time you stay there, you earn rewards towards your next trip.

[Christine]

Congrats.

[Bobby Kelly]

Now you're in a vrbo. Make it a VRBO one keycash is not redeemable for cash and can only be used on Expedia hotels dot com. And VRBO High Five Casino is the top social casino that's free to play. With real cash prizes, free spin rewards and tons of exclusive games, you can experience more high five moments than ever before. It's like having a casino on your phone. Slots, ringy dingies, all the bells and whistles. Going to love it. You're going to want to high five everyone. The neighbors, the mailman, all your co workers, of course your friends. Well, you get the point. Your High Five moment [e-mail]. No purchase necessary void were prohibited by law. Must be 21 years or older. Terms and conditions apply.

[Big J Okerson]

And now the bonfire with Big J Okerson and Robert Kelly.

[Bobby Kelly]

DJ Lou, you picked this song. So I assume you were seduced in a jungle this weekend or something?

[DJ Lou]

No, no. And I just heard it in the lobby.

[Bobby Kelly]

Did you Shazam it? Shazam.

[DJ Lou]

No, I knew what it was.

[Bobby Kelly]

What is it?

[DJ Lou]

Eric the Enrock him.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, really? When does the part come in?

[DJ Lou]

It's the cut cold remix. Paid in full.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, it's a remix. So it's just the beat. It's not this song at all.

[DJ Lou]

That's right. 10 minute song.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. This is not Eric B. You just challenged. You tried to challenge my blackness in front of black Lou.

[Big J Okerson]

How dare you.

[DJ Lou]

And I did. Shazam it. I lied to you.

[Bobby Kelly]

He did also. He lied to me.

[Big J Okerson]

Wow. The new. That's such a good. What a good.

[Bobby Kelly]

You. You know, Bobby.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

You mentioned that we. This is our last week of black Piven. You're. You're negative of pivot now. Not you, but.

[Big J Okerson]

I know. But he did admit his lie.

[Bobby Kelly]

Huh? He admitted he lied, which will get him one white PIV.

[Big J Okerson]

It is. I like that. Not as good.

[Bobby Kelly]

You get one white pivot, but you are down one black pivot. My man. You are black PIV dead.

[Big J Okerson]

The street. That's. You can't get nothing on the street with that, buddy. I found my thing. I found.

[Bobby Kelly]

Where was it? Under your wiener? Under your belly the whole time? You finally found it.

[Big J Okerson]

Not that thing. Oh, I haven't found that yet. God, it's still inside me. You know how you have the mittens with the no fangs?

[Bobby Kelly]

Thumb holes.

[Big J Okerson]

Thumb holes? I Think of my thing. I don't know. I don't know what it is. Wait a minute. What was that?

[Bobby Kelly]

I like, I don't dislike this.

[Big J Okerson]

I don't know if you like it. Okay, all right, please, I need honesty because I have always been into thumb holes.

[Bobby Kelly]

I like the look.

[Big J Okerson]

I love thumb holes. I've always loved them. But I've been afraid of thumb holes my whole life because of my, you know, my thing. Hey, what's up? How you doing? What's up, dude? How you doing? And now you can't.

[Bobby Kelly]

You're selling NOS balloons at a Marilyn Manson concert.

[Big J Okerson]

I just, I, I, I love a thumb hole and I've hidden, I've hidden my thumb hole love from my friends and my family and everybody for years. I've never.

[Bobby Kelly]

Well, mostly it's the pre made. There's a pre made thumb hole or you made that?

[Big J Okerson]

No, no, no, no. These are, these are pre made.

[Bobby Kelly]

Okay. Pre made thumb holes usually. Come on. Aerobic wear for women, that's the issue. Well, that's what you're going to run into.

[Big J Okerson]

This is a hoodie, a black hoodie. And I have a couple of these hoodies with thumb holes. And I'm really into them. Yeah, I'm, I, I, I just want to admit that to you because I.

[Bobby Kelly]

I feel like I like thumb holes.

[Big J Okerson]

Do, Are you, Do you really? Because you're not looking me in the eye right now. You look.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'm looking at the thumb holes.

[Big J Okerson]

You're looking at my thumb holes. But I need you to look me in the eye.

[Bobby Kelly]

I like the thumb holes look.

[Big J Okerson]

Nope.

[Bobby Kelly]

I love the thumb holes.

[Big J Okerson]

You love them?

[Bobby Kelly]

I love them. But, But. There's a but. Oh, you gotta make sure you pick the clothes that go right with the thumb holes. Christine, look up hoodies with thumb holes. It's gonna be a, just a. You're gonna. An onslaught of female clothing.

[Big J Okerson]

Really?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

Well, this is.

[Bobby Kelly]

I, but I do also like the. I've been excited to get better. Things with thumb holes tend to be like Lululemon tops.

[Big J Okerson]

Okay.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. A lot of ladies. A lot of ladies with your thumb holes.

[Big J Okerson]

Am I trans?

[Bobby Kelly]

Keep going down. Am I going, you know, Hit images. Hit shopping. Hit shopping. Okay. Still, it's really coming up heavy, girl.

[Big J Okerson]

God. Okay, type in men thumb holes.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yes, type. There's just click the word. Just click the word. Men's. No, no, no.

[Big J Okerson]

Men's.

[Bobby Kelly]

Right there at the top. I'll teach Christine how to look it up yet. Right? Those guys are built like ladies.

[Big J Okerson]

Well, I'm not Built like a lady.

[Bobby Kelly]

But even when you put in men's, if you scroll down pretty quick, they still throw a lady in there.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, boy, oh, boy.

[Bobby Kelly]

Do you see what I mean? It's like aerobic wear and then ladies again.

[Jacob]

Well, yeah, we'd say athletic wear. Athletic wear.

[Bobby Kelly]

What ladies like you would say athletic wear. Okay, sorry. Athletic wear. My apologies, man.

[Jacob]

Bobby, feel better?

[Big J Okerson]

Well, I mean, he does have a point. We are the. The bonfire bandboy.

[Bobby Kelly]

Here's what I think. Christine, what are these called? Here's what I think your things should be. Especially in the summertime. What are those things that have sleeves, Thumb holes, but they just go across your shoulders and top it like, just goes across here. It's just shoulder.

[Christine]

Well, that's not a shrug.

[Big J Okerson]

You're talking. You're talking the music. I like the guys who sing the. Who have the English accents.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

What's his name?

[Bobby Kelly]

I don't know. You like Manoskin?

[Big J Okerson]

I like mana skin.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yes. You want to dress like Manoskin? I feel like I'm thinking like a post Mad Max.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

Kind of like. But like sexy. There it is. That's exactly what I'm thinking. That's exactly what I'm thinking.

[Big J Okerson]

I can't wear that though, because.

[Bobby Kelly]

Christine, just look up the word formation shrug. Now we know what it's called. Now let's get to the different ones.

[Big J Okerson]

Formation shrug. For men.

[Bobby Kelly]

For men.

[Big J Okerson]

For men.

[Bobby Kelly]

But can you put thumb holes?

[Big J Okerson]

Older men. Is there an older men formation?

[Bobby Kelly]

Gentlemen's gentleman's formation. Shrugging.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Jacob]

Can I say, Bobby, I like this look for the bonfire workout crew. I like. This is your pre workout gear.

[Big J Okerson]

This is because these would be good with the bands. Because I can, you know. True. Those would have my gloves. I actually worked out in my underwear on Saturday.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, that's weird. There it is. There it is.

[Big J Okerson]

I don't mind that.

[Bobby Kelly]

With thumb holes.

[Big J Okerson]

With thumb holes.

[Bobby Kelly]

Formation shrug.

[Big J Okerson]

Now what am I going to do with my top half? Am I still going to wear a T shirt?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yes.

[Big J Okerson]

All right. I should wear a T shirt.

[Bobby Kelly]

I would say maybe a tank top, though.

[Big J Okerson]

Mmm. I'm not good in tank tops.

[Bobby Kelly]

Okay. T shirt.

[Big J Okerson]

You look into tank top? No, I have a barrel chest. I have like the original Superman's chest.

[Bobby Kelly]

That's good in the tank top.

[Big J Okerson]

No, it's barrel chest is not good. I've not. I have that, like, it's do.

[Bobby Kelly]

I don't have a barrel chest.

[Big J Okerson]

No, you have a man's chest. You have like a big Italian man chest. You know What? I mean, you look good in a tank top. I've seen you in a tank top. I look. I look like, I don't know, Hannah Gatsby in the tank.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, don't you dare.

[Big J Okerson]

I do. I have a barrel chest? It's not that.

[Bobby Kelly]

You mean Hannah Gatsby now, though?

[Big J Okerson]

Yes.

[Bobby Kelly]

Not the young rapable one?

[Big J Okerson]

No.

[Bobby Kelly]

Okay.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, I love those pants.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, Bobby, not for me.

[Big J Okerson]

Not for me.

[Bobby Kelly]

Bobby, those are not for you.

[Big J Okerson]

Okay. Not for me.

[Bobby Kelly]

But the formation shrug with the thumb holes.

[Christine]

It's just the formation. Shrug was the name of that one.

[Big J Okerson]

What is this called?

[Bobby Kelly]

A shrug.

[Big J Okerson]

A shrug, buddy. I'm loving this.

[Bobby Kelly]

Okay.

[Big J Okerson]

Do they have a man shrug?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yes. That's it. No, she's wearing her boyfriend stuff.

[Big J Okerson]

No, I want to type in shrug for man with thumb holes.

[Bobby Kelly]

And if you want to type in the word formation, I don't care.

[Big J Okerson]

I think I like it, though. I really have always loved the thumb hole. And I was scared.

[Bobby Kelly]

Gino Basconti is a big fan of thumb holes, but again, they go. It's like they're attached to under armor, almost. It's usually athletic wear. Okay.

[Big J Okerson]

I love that bag. Who is that bag?

[Bobby Kelly]

Hold the phone, Bobby. You wear that shirt. I'll buy you the bag. Wherever it is, whatever it is.

[Jacob]

Describe what we're seeing here.

[Bobby Kelly]

What am I seeing? My God. I don't know. I can only. Is the best description. Just showing a picture of my boner buddy.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, I like that. Does it come in double X?

[Bobby Kelly]

I do think this guy has urticaria pigmentosa on his stomach, though, which I also suffer from.

[Big J Okerson]

What is your. What is it?

[Bobby Kelly]

Urticaria pigmentosa. Zoom in, Christine. Please enhance.

[Christine]

What is this freckling?

[Bobby Kelly]

Huh?

[Christine]

I think it's just freckle.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, you're saying what, this guy's too handsome to have. You're saying this guy's too handsome to have. My skin affliction.

[Big J Okerson]

What's the red one?

[Christine]

His spots are brown, not red.

[Bobby Kelly]

I don't know. They look as red as mine. Look, I think the guy's got urticaria pigmentosa. He's a disgusting troll.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm impressed with it. You can say it over and over again and not mess it up one more time.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, no. It haunts my dreams. Bobby, I don't know if you know this about me, but I have major insecurities, and I don't take showers in light because of this very thing this guy's wearing. A shrug and a fucking half top. I like it. Bobby, get this.

[Big J Okerson]

I will get It. Please send me the link. But are you going to get me the bag? If I get that. I do like that hip bag.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yes.

[Big J Okerson]

All right, great.

[Jacob]

Bobby, you know where you're going to actually not find a feminine version, like a man's version.

[Bobby Kelly]

Baba skin.

[Jacob]

A little circle here because the thumbs are layering.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Jacob]

So when you're putting your hand through a thicker coat, the sleeve doesn't go back to your.

[Big J Okerson]

That's what it's for, right?

[Jacob]

Yes, that's what it's for. It's the.

[Bobby Kelly]

So when you leave a gym as a lady orange theory, you're a hiker.

[Big J Okerson]

So. But that. That's what it's for.

[Jacob]

Yes.

[Big J Okerson]

So when I slip my. So there's a reason for. It's not just the desire I have for thumb holes.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yes.

[Big J Okerson]

It makes me feel good.

[Bobby Kelly]

Absolutely.

[Jacob]

When you're layering.

[Big J Okerson]

Layering makes me feel good. Like my hands, buddy.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's total young Marilyn Manson guitar player.

[Big J Okerson]

Just want to dance.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's gothic.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's cool.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

But it's hard to find it unattached to men's. I thought were. Were there thumb holes in the men's shrug, Christine. Because if there wasn't. There was.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

Okay. Bobby.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah. I think that's how the shirt stays on. With the thumb holes. Without the thumb holes. That's coming right off.

[Bobby Kelly]

And now that we love this, I'd like to show you what your new look has. A name we didn't even know.

[Big J Okerson]

What is it?

[Bobby Kelly]

Cyberpunk. You're going full cyberpunk for 2025. I love it, Jacob. I'm gonna hope you get to see it before your tuberculosis takes you over.

[Big J Okerson]

Probably not.

[Bobby Kelly]

Who's fucking longer?

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

What's up, Longer?

[Big J Okerson]

Hey, Doc Holliday. Hey, Dog Holiday. Why don't you stick around for the.

[Bobby Kelly]

Longer. Wasn't talking to you. Longer.

[Big J Okerson]

I like a shrug. I'm happy. Now, is dawn gonna like it?

[Bobby Kelly]

No.

[Big J Okerson]

No. Fuck her.

[Bobby Kelly]

Here's what it is. Dawn doesn't want the world seeing what you have to offer.

[Big J Okerson]

No.

[Bobby Kelly]

No. She wants to keep you wrapped up in your little box up in Katona. Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

She wants to get quilted jackets. Earth tones.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. She tries to send you out there when you start getting all that earthy shit.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

And the flannels and the big. No one's gonna fuck yas. She plays that up hard, she feels very, very safe. You start wearing this around town, she's gonna know. She better snap her shit together or her days are numbered.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Jacob]

Question for Bobby.

[Big J Okerson]

Yes, Jacob. Go ahead.

[Jacob]

Let me ask you something. You're adopting this look. Your dream, I know, is to run into Ryan Reynolds at the bakery. Does Bobby. Does new Bobby wearing thumb holes feel comfortable having Ryan Reynolds see him wearing thumb holed clothing?

[Bobby Kelly]

Bobby, can I say before you answer that question, if you're gonna do the thumb holes, I would suggest light mascara.

[Big J Okerson]

Can I admit something I wasn't gonna tell you guys?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

I think I'm changing Ryan's.

[Bobby Kelly]

Hmm.

[Big J Okerson]

I think I'm giving up on Reynolds and I'm going to Gosling.

[Bobby Kelly]

Really?

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

That guy will. He'll appreciate the goth look for sure.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm thinking he will. And I'm also thinking I'm into his humor more now. Maybe it's where I'm at in life because I'm a boomer. Yeah, I think.

[Bobby Kelly]

Well, you're funnier. I'll see. Like a younger, hotter guy.

[Big J Okerson]

Well, he's.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's classic.

[Big J Okerson]

I think he's hotter. I think he's funnier. And he has less controversy around. I'm hearing that Ryan is not such a nice guy. Reynolds. Reynolds. And I don't want to put all my eggs in one basket.

[Bobby Kelly]

He was mean to our friend T.J. was he?

[Big J Okerson]

Yes, he was. I remember that. Right. So now look at this guy.

[Jacob]

But is he a Katona resident?

[Big J Okerson]

Buddy, I don't know, but I'm pretty sure everybody who's famous lives in my town.

[Bobby Kelly]

I don't think that's exactly true, dude.

[Big J Okerson]

Who doesn't?

[Bobby Kelly]

I don't know.

[Big J Okerson]

Dennis. Edie. Edie Reynolds. Blake. The guy. What's his name? That was here from the thing. From the thing. From. Who does all the Indian voice. What's his name?

[Bobby Kelly]

You're not off one hand. Hank is. After you said Hank. Is everybody.

[Big J Okerson]

Hank Azaria. How many. Dude, Hank is area. Dennis Leary, Martha Stewart, Chaz Palmitari. Edie Falco. Brian Reynolds.

[Bobby Kelly]

All the people in entertainment.

[Big J Okerson]

Name another one.

[Jacob]

Blake Lively.

[Big J Okerson]

Blake Lively.

[Bobby Kelly]

Brad Pitt.

[Big J Okerson]

Brad Pitt Live. He has a house.

[Bobby Kelly]

Nope.

[Big J Okerson]

Wait, let me finish. Not in Bedford, but in Rhinebeck, which is a little further out. Bang. The guy from Walking Dead lives in Rhinebeck. The guy who played Ant man lives in Rhinebeck.

[Jacob]

Which Walking.

[Big J Okerson]

The guy with the stick with the barbed wire. Yeah, he. Thank you. What's his name again?

[Bobby Kelly]

Jeffrey Dean Morgan.

[Big J Okerson]

Jeffrey Dean Morgan has a candy shop with Ant man an hour away from me.

[Bobby Kelly]

You said Jeffrey Dean Morgan.

[Big J Okerson]

No, that. That guy.

[Bobby Kelly]

That's not what you said.

[Big J Okerson]

I said the guy from Walking Dead with the stick. Negan.

[Bobby Kelly]

I know. Jeffrey Dean Morgan is.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, well, there you go. I'm saying a lot of. A lot of. Listen, famous people move where I live. That's it. They live up there.

[Bobby Kelly]

Okay, well, I think Ryan Gosling is going to react much bigger. And I'll tell you this. Yeah, you're right. He's a big, big star.

[Big J Okerson]

Bigger.

[Bobby Kelly]

But if you come in rocking that outfit, that cyberpunk outfit with that shrug formation. Shrug, yeah. You. You will be the trophy he deserves.

[Big J Okerson]

Ryan Reynolds.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. No, no, no.

[Big J Okerson]

Ryan Gosling. Gosling, yeah. I don't want to waste it on Ryan Reynolds. I think he'll give me an attitude.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, he's smarmy.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, he's smarmy. And I don't think he's the right fit for me right now.

[Bobby Kelly]

You have to act like his fucking wife's mole. Doesn't change everything about her.

[Big J Okerson]

Changes all.

[Bobby Kelly]

Just fix it.

[Big J Okerson]

Get it off.

[Bobby Kelly]

I don't fucking fix it.

[Big J Okerson]

If it's 98%, she'll die in the operation. Take that shot.

[Bobby Kelly]

Take it off.

[Big J Okerson]

Take the shot.

[Bobby Kelly]

Life will be better for all of us. Settling for old ass Ryan Reynolds simply because of that molecular.

[Big J Okerson]

I know, dude, look at him. Look at this guy.

[Bobby Kelly]

She could have Ryan Gosling. She gets rid of that mole body.

[Big J Okerson]

Look how good. I mean, he sings, he dances, he's shredded. He's funny. He's a Ryan. Look at him.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, listen, I don't want to meet him either.

[Big J Okerson]

What?

[Bobby Kelly]

But that's not. That's me, dude. I don't have thumb. Whole life.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah. There's two people I want to meet. Ryan Reynolds was Ryan Gosling now and Kelly Clarkson. Can you please get Kelly Clarkson on the show?

[Bobby Kelly]

Are you asking me?

[Big J Okerson]

I'm asking everybody in listening distance of this program if we could get her on the show and have her sit next to me so we can have her on the show. Why can't we get her on the show? She films a block away. Christine Produce. You're the producer of the century. You run one of the biggest festivals. I mean, on the plan. The biggest comedy festival now in the world.

[Bobby Kelly]

Do you believe that?

[Christine]

Yeah, it's not that big.

[Big J Okerson]

No, I don't believe the biggest comedy.

[Bobby Kelly]

Festival in the world.

[Big J Okerson]

Trying to.

[Bobby Kelly]

One of them was sponsored by the. By the. Canada. The Canadian government.

[Big J Okerson]

I was trying to hype it up. If someone's listening, they don't know the details. They'd be like, who is she? Let me find out.

[Christine]

You. Kelly. We manifested, Bobby. We all want Kelly Clarkson.

[Big J Okerson]

I've been manifesting in my sauna for months all Right.

[Christine]

Well, we're working.

[Bobby Kelly]

That's different kind of manifestation.

[Christine]

It will happen.

[Big J Okerson]

That's the different N word.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. I've been manifesting. Manifesting the Kelly Clarkson lately too, if you know what I mean. The severe weight loss.

[Big J Okerson]

She looks good.

[Bobby Kelly]

She does.

[Big J Okerson]

She sings so good.

[Bobby Kelly]

She sings good. Fat or thin, which is impressive.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, she does.

[Bobby Kelly]

She'll never be back to since you've been gone, but you're too old for that now anyway.

[Big J Okerson]

I don't want that. I just want.

[Bobby Kelly]

But that is the hottest.

[Big J Okerson]

Hottest. But I would like. I love the Christmas songs.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. You like a fat woman singing over cookies. Your tastes have changed.

[Big J Okerson]

I do. Speaking of cookies, I was given a lot of yesterday by your significant other about not being a good one. And then our friend Lou over here said, oh, I stayed home and made cookies with my family because I'm. I'm a good one.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. What are you gonna bring cookies?

[Big J Okerson]

Well, me and my family last night.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

Made cookies.

[Bobby Kelly]

Now you seem like an Uncle Tom, and I. Whoa. Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

Whoa.

[Bobby Kelly]

You seem like you're Uncle Tom, and why try to impress black Lou?

[Big J Okerson]

I'm not trying to. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Dude, dude, dude. That's not true. I'm trying to let you know that I. I. Lou, can you look at me, please? Louis, I'm a little skeptical of this.

[Bobby Kelly]

Go ahead. Me too. I'm skeptical too.

[Big J Okerson]

Me.

[Bobby Kelly]

Okay.

[Big J Okerson]

Me, Don, and my son Max. Last night as a family, we made cookies.

[Bobby Kelly]

The edges are darker, so these were made.

[Big J Okerson]

Are you. You don't think I made those cookies? Are you. You think I bought cookies? Maybe to kiss up to Black Lou?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. Now, it really took you down realizing, and I'm surprised, the first time in your life, you found out you're not one of the good ones.

[Big J Okerson]

I am one of the good ones.

[Bobby Kelly]

And you're shattered by it rather than just accepting who you are.

[Big J Okerson]

First of all, standing up on it, leaning on one hip with thumb holes.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yes.

[Big J Okerson]

My hand on my hip. One of the greatest feelings I've ever felt in my life. This thumb hole thing is knocking my dick off.

[Bobby Kelly]

I know.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm loving it.

[Bobby Kelly]

It doesn't. You never get the Frankenstein arms from your shirts anymore.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, my God, I love this. Look at this. This is just great. Listen to me. Oh, I did a little flippy for you. Thank you, buddy. Appreciate you.

[Bobby Kelly]

I wish you would have figured this out one day before for our pictures. Now everyone knows you're a thumb hole.

[Big J Okerson]

God damn it.

[Bobby Kelly]

I wore the gloves, dude.

[Big J Okerson]

Can we redo picture day?

[Jacob]

I Can ask if she can make thumb holes.

[Big J Okerson]

Make thumb holes. Oh, God.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, she could superimpose some thumb holes on. Can I say possible? We can get. We can get some posts.

[Big J Okerson]

Don did pick out my stupid Katona outfit. Yeah, you look like a rock star. I look like some asshole had a.

[Bobby Kelly]

Flower shop up in Katona trying to keep you in house.

[Big J Okerson]

And I would have went thumb holes. Yeah, I would have went thumb holes hoodie with my. My red sneaks.

[Bobby Kelly]

Dawn, children, it doesn't matter. Nothing's gonna hold you back. When you go full cyberpunk, you will be a fully realized Robert Kelly.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, my God. What is that?

[Bobby Kelly]

There it is. Dude, what is that? There it is.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, I'm gonna become an assassin.

[Bobby Kelly]

That's the entire outfit.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm gonna become a papired killer. I'm like, right now. Email me if you want somebody murdered. I will be doing it with my new outfit. I will kill for money.

[Christine]

Absolutely does come in at 2x.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, my God. Well, all right. Don't say it like, oh, my God. Did you hear what she just said?

[Bobby Kelly]

It does come in 2x.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, but she.

[Bobby Kelly]

That's exciting news.

[Big J Okerson]

And it does. Like, she was. She was literally shocked. Get it? I want it, Bobby.

[Bobby Kelly]

So. By the way, I want to tell you something. I'm going to bear my soul right now to you. You can make fun of me if you want.

[Big J Okerson]

I bear my soul to you. That I love thumb holes. Bear it.

[Bobby Kelly]

I think inside of me doesn't linger a thing that wants all these little strappies and danglies flying off of me.

[Big J Okerson]

You love a dangle with a deep.

[Bobby Kelly]

Hood that covers my face.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah. You want to feel it like you died and a crow brought you back to life.

[Bobby Kelly]

I do.

[Big J Okerson]

For love.

[Bobby Kelly]

I do. Until I just avenge my true love's killers and then I can be at rest.

[Big J Okerson]

But who's your true love?

[Bobby Kelly]

I know it's gonna be so hard if the crow had to go find a 3x outfit.

[Big J Okerson]

It wasn't a crow.

[Bobby Kelly]

See him trying on, like, eight different, like, leather dusters. Like, no, no, do that. He goes, come on. Maybe. Maybe if I can open the back up a little bit. He's like, no, I don't want to cut it to fit.

[Big J Okerson]

Ours wouldn't be a crow. It'd be a turkey. Vulture.

[Bobby Kelly]

Formation shrugs. They're back. Oh, my God, Christine, don't order these for yourself. That's not your look.

[Christine]

No, I saw, like, shrugs that have femholes where I'm like, I'm just gonna make that my whole Personality now.

[Big J Okerson]

Femholes shrugs with thumb holes. Oh, I think femholes don't call them fem holes.

[Bobby Kelly]

Femholes.

[Big J Okerson]

I don't like a femhole.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, your sleeve pussies. Yeah, yeah. Oh, Bobby, finger your sleeve for this next picture.

[Big J Okerson]

I don't mind sleeve pussies. I actually like slee sleeve.

[Bobby Kelly]

Are you fingering your sleeve?

[Big J Okerson]

I got my thumb sleeve in it. I like a sleeve.

[Bobby Kelly]

How do you feel if we both just adopted this entire look, buddy, I.

[Big J Okerson]

Listen, you want to pop this show off, we gotta stand out, right?

[Bobby Kelly]

I want to stop use our guests when we come in both dressed like this. What is this?

[Big J Okerson]

Listen to me. We should. We should definitely do that. The next big guess we. We get, we come in dressed. Cyberpunk.

[Bobby Kelly]

The only thing I hate about this. What Is that we're not allowed to light active candles in the studio.

[Big J Okerson]

We can get fake ones. I got fake ones.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's not as macabre. I'd like real flames dancing. So while I'm talking to you, when I'm saying something really cryptic, I can make my fingers dance through the flames, and I go. The flames dance like the thoughts in my mind. Do I take down. Do I take down an office building?

[Big J Okerson]

Macabre makes me laugh. Dude. What the. Oh, man.

[Bobby Kelly]

I don't know how to say for sure. Is it just macabre or macabre? I think macabre makes me laugh more.

[Big J Okerson]

I think macabre is way better than macabre, whatever the hell it is.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, look at Bobby. He made cookies with his family simply to brag.

[Big J Okerson]

No, I didn't make. No, no.

[Bobby Kelly]

He brought the only seven not burnt ones that he didn't up.

[Big J Okerson]

That is not true.

[Bobby Kelly]

Look at you.

[Big J Okerson]

Try that cookie right now. You tell me that cookie's not the. Try that cookie right now, and you tell me that that cookie is not with family love. You took the crispy one. You took the crispy one.

[Bobby Kelly]

Crispy take. Don't take that.

[Big J Okerson]

Whoa, whoa, whoa. You took the crispy one.

[Bobby Kelly]

I didn't know. I grabbed the cookie.

[Big J Okerson]

Grab the. Grab the other.

[Bobby Kelly]

What do I do with this crispy one?

[Big J Okerson]

Now give that to Jacob. He loves crispy. Jacob. Take that cookie. Take the cookie. You're welcome.

[Bobby Kelly]

Listen, if you don't like dawn, don't eat it.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah. If you don't like my family. There you go. Crispy, soft, boom. And. Ah. Now take a bite of that. You tell me there's not family love that I'm not. I'm not one of the ones you Tell me. Last night that we. We cooked these. We had dinner together at the table. We talked. Max had a little trouble. Little girl trouble last night. And was confined. No. The hell's wrong with you?

[Bobby Kelly]

I think abortion's so equal.

[Big J Okerson]

No, she's not getting.

[Bobby Kelly]

No.

[Big J Okerson]

There's no living. Kissed. What the hell is wrong with you? What are you laughing at, you crazy lady?

[Bobby Kelly]

I didn't know you told Mouse to pull out.

[Big J Okerson]

I didn't tell him to party sex.

[Bobby Kelly]

He leaves it in.

[Big J Okerson]

No, he doesn't put it on. It doesn't come out.

[Bobby Kelly]

Wow.

[Big J Okerson]

No, no, no, it does. He. They haven't even kissed. It just, you know, whatever.

[Bobby Kelly]

Jack each other off.

[Big J Okerson]

They're just friends. They're friends, but he's having a little trouble. But he. We had a nice conversation about it. And then we had dinner and then we had cookies. And then we watched my favorite new show that's back on Reacher. Reacher's back.

[Jacob]

It was good.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, it's such a good show.

[Jacob]

Rebound from last season.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah. Can I tell you what he has that you have? Stomach freckles.

[Bobby Kelly]

Reacher.

[Big J Okerson]

Reacher has. What do you call it again?

[Bobby Kelly]

It's urticaria pigmentosa. It's incurable. That's what a receptionist called me to tell me one day. But go get checked to make sure it's not. What was it, Leukemia? That's what they said. A receptionist told me that they're not.

[Big J Okerson]

Supposed to do that.

[Bobby Kelly]

They're not. Right.

[Big J Okerson]

They're not. The doctor's supposed to go, you have to come in and talk to me.

[Bobby Kelly]

She goes, you have urticaria pigmentosa. Non curable, non treatable. And.

[Jacob]

But what does it do, huh? What will it do?

[Big J Okerson]

Makes your stomach look like somebody threw shit at a screen.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's like those.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's something that you would never give two shits about.

[Christine]

Jay's a very wild case of it.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, that's not true at all.

[Christine]

No. Well, when you Google it, like, this is what you google. You don't have this at all.

[Big J Okerson]

You don't have that. You have that. Because I'm leaving.

[Bobby Kelly]

Not yet.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm leaving. I'm not coming back. If you have that, we should all leave the room.

[Bobby Kelly]

If you have that, they could definitely go to that.

[Big J Okerson]

Can you catch it? We can't catch it.

[Bobby Kelly]

Right. Well, we'll never know. I. No, I don't think so. But I will say I'll kill myself before it gets anywhere near. Without a doubt.

[Big J Okerson]

Can I have you watch? Yes.

[Bobby Kelly]

My tomb of autos laughed at you. Laughed them right off my wrist. I've never worn those things again.

[Big J Okerson]

I loved your Movados.

[Bobby Kelly]

Spent twelve hundred dollars on watches and Bobby laughed at it.

[Big J Okerson]

I did not laugh at your Movados.

[Bobby Kelly]

I like most expensive thing I own that I've worn.

[Big J Okerson]

It's not. I'm just. I love this Movados. I thought they were great. The blacked out Movado was beautiful.

[Jacob]

When did you get Movados, Jay?

[Big J Okerson]

No, I didn't even.

[Bobby Kelly]

You wouldn't remember. It was one day I wore one of them and Bobby goes, as long as you like it. That's what he said. And I never wore it again.

[Big J Okerson]

Whatever, dude.

[Bobby Kelly]

I don't know if it has the right time on it anymore. They just sit. They sit on a little rack in my room and I look at them every day. And then I put on my bracelet, my pink bracelet.

[Big J Okerson]

That's the only thing about thumb holes, is I can't show my.

[Bobby Kelly]

My Rolex, which is a lot, because I will tell you.

[Big J Okerson]

Wow.

[Bobby Kelly]

Tell me I'm crazy.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

I feel like the gloves enhance the wrist accoutrement.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah. Dude, can you try it on, please? Let me see it.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, the watch.

[Big J Okerson]

Please, please.

[Bobby Kelly]

Small for me.

[Big J Okerson]

That's Alexis you're holding.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'm worried it's too small for me.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, that's what she said.

[Bobby Kelly]

I don't have little wrists that go through thumb holes.

[Big J Okerson]

Whatever, dude.

[Bobby Kelly]

I don't care.

[Big J Okerson]

Whatever, dudes.

[Bobby Kelly]

This is the Rolex.

[Big J Okerson]

That's the Sky Dweller. That is the most complicated Rolex they make. It's one of the biggest they make.

[Bobby Kelly]

What does that mean? Like emotionally complicated. Like you think it likes you one day.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm telling you right now, that watch right there looks sick.

[Bobby Kelly]

Should I take off my whore bracelets, though?

[Big J Okerson]

No, leave your whore braces with the Rolex.

[Bobby Kelly]

Whore braces stay on.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah. It shows you that you're whore and you got a little class.

[Bobby Kelly]

Okay.

[Big J Okerson]

Look at that watch, Christine. That's when you get them right there. Get them the green or the blue dial.

[Bobby Kelly]

Does it go with my sweats? Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

Not expensive either.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, no, you said it was. You said the word Lexus.

[Big J Okerson]

When you. When you buy it, it's when you get. When I. If you want that, I'll get it from my person for retail. But then when you buy it, it goes way up because you can't get them. That's why.

[Christine]

Look, this one's $217,000.

[Big J Okerson]

Yes, one, but that's a. That's a gold. That's gold.

[Bobby Kelly]

See if they have it for like 215.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, they made 217.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, I can't do it.

[Big J Okerson]

See, if they got for 215, someone just bought. Oh, I know somebody who's buying the solid gold. One of those, which is $65,000. You don't want that, though.

[Bobby Kelly]

That'd be funny if you're doing this right.

[Big J Okerson]

If you snapped it.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, I definitely won't do that. I'm not pushing that hard. But it is catching my mitten. It's catching my mitten. You're attached to my mitten.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, no. It's all right. Thank you, Jay.

[Bobby Kelly]

How your stupid watch ruined my mitten.

[Big J Okerson]

Did it? Did it? Did it pull your mittens?

[Bobby Kelly]

It pulled a thread. Now it doesn't sit right on my wrist. And now my whore bracelets look stupid.

[Big J Okerson]

Does Christine have to run home and get spare mittens?

[Bobby Kelly]

Christine, get my backup mittens.

[Big J Okerson]

Christine, do you travel with spare mittens in case he gets a run in his mittens.

[Bobby Kelly]

She travels with Afrin. If I have Afrin, I'll figure out mittens.

[Big J Okerson]

I tell you what doesn't run. Thumb holes. Pussy. What are they called? Pussy.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, you're sleep pussies.

[Big J Okerson]

Sleeve pussies. Sleeve pussies.

[Bobby Kelly]

I think the greatest thing ever.

[Big J Okerson]

We should copyright that right now.

[Bobby Kelly]

Make our own shirts with sleeve pussies.

[Big J Okerson]

We should make our own shirts.

[Bobby Kelly]

And we say things with our proprietary. Is that the right word they say on the shark tank? With our proprietary sleeve pussy technology, it's very different because it has manoris and majoris holes. Okay, now we're cooking with gas. Jacob, I hope you're taking down notes when I'm saying this. Okay, now, first, your thumb will go through the majoris and then pierce the minoris, which is what really holds it in the place in your sleeve. Pussy.

[Big J Okerson]

Can I say this?

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, my God. We're gonna be batting down offers. I don't want to go with Cuban. I don't like his whole thing.

[Big J Okerson]

I don't like him. I like the. The.

[Bobby Kelly]

The.

[Big J Okerson]

The skeleton white chick.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'll take the skeleton white dick. That girl party, she let Ralph grab her titties. And I'll tell you this. Also, I like Lori Greiner's personality. But I'll tell you what, that profile, man, that thing comes in a door 10 minutes before the rest of her face. That nose is something else. She looks like Alice the goon from Popeye. Remember the goons? Yeah, they're just made of noses and eyes.

[Big J Okerson]

They had a goon island. Remember the goon island?

[Bobby Kelly]

There was A goon island.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

Well, that's where Lori Greiner escaped from to build her small fortune in QVC products.

[Big J Okerson]

Can I really be honest right now? If we made a hoodie with Sleeve Pussies trademark. Sleeve Pussies trademark. And we actually made these into little pussies, you know, you know, big. That would be.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. First of all, when we get to. When we get the shark tank, we're all going to be like, we're in Spencer's. Across the country already. Netcredit is here to say yes to a personal loan or line of credit when other lenders say know, apply in minutes and get a decision as soon as the same day.

[Big J Okerson]

If approved, applications are typically funded the.

[Bobby Kelly]

Next business day or sooner. Loans offered by NetCredit or lending partner banks and serviced by NetCredit application subject to review and approval. Learn more at netcredit.com partners netcredit credit to the People.

[Big J Okerson]

Wow. Incredible. Amazing.

[Bobby Kelly]

Lumify Redness Reliever Eye drops really work. They dramatically reduce redness in one minute.

[Big J Okerson]

I love how my eyes look whiter.

[Bobby Kelly]

And brighter and it lasts for up to eight hours. They make my eyes look refreshed.

[Big J Okerson]

Lumify.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's kind of amazing. It was love at first sight with Lumify. Try it for yourself. Learn more@lumify eyes.com Day.

[Big J Okerson]

Every day, our world gets a little more connected, but a little further apart. But then there are moments that remind us to be more human.

[Bobby Kelly]

Thank you for calling Amica Insurance. Hey, I was just in an accident. Don't worry, we'll get you taken care of.

[Big J Okerson]

At Amica, we understand that looking out for each other isn't new, new or groundbreaking. It's human. Amica empathy is our best policy. Does it ever feel like you're a.

[Bobby Kelly]

Marketing professional just speaking into the void? Well, with LinkedIn ads, you can know.

[Big J Okerson]

You'Re reaching the right decision makers. You can even target buyers by job title industry, company seniority skills. Wait, did I say job title yet? Get started today and see how you can avoid the void and reach the right buyer with LinkedIn ads. We'll even give you a $100 credit on your next campaign. Get started at LinkedIn.com results.

[Bobby Kelly]

Terms and conditions apply. I'll tell you something that bummed me out. I went into a Hot Topic this weekend. Hot Topic? Well, no, I was like, you know what? I could probably get some cool T shirts from Hot Topic now and they'll fit me.

[Big J Okerson]

How many people asked you where things were when you were in there?

[Bobby Kelly]

Nobody anymore. Hot Topic has changed. Do you know that? They changed their demographic. It's all an and shit like that now. There's no more. It used to be like Pantera shirts and all the band shirts.

[Big J Okerson]

None of that anymore.

[Bobby Kelly]

None of that anymore. It's just. It's just Japanese animation, horror, a little bit of horror stuff, but no more.

[Big J Okerson]

And they sell weird Japanese candy too, right?

[Bobby Kelly]

Maybe. But it's a fucking strange place now and it's not what it used to be. And I hate that. I thought I'd go in for a nice belt.

[Christine]

Yeah, you did recently get a belt from there.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, I didn't.

[Christine]

The pink belt with the studs.

[Bobby Kelly]

I did get that. There it goes in my bracelet.

[Big J Okerson]

I guarantee if you walk in, there's a poster interview in the back office.

[Bobby Kelly]

That would be dope, wouldn't it?

[Big J Okerson]

That was.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's looking cool now with thumb technology. Sleep. Sleep.

[Big J Okerson]

You really bought a pink belt?

[Bobby Kelly]

No, it's a black belt with pink and purple spikes on it. Studs.

[Big J Okerson]

Pink and purple studs.

[Christine]

It's not a pink belt with black studs.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, it's not. But I would like that. Can you see if that's available, please?

[Christine]

Can I have a dawn cookie and I'll look.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, what? She wants a dawn cookie.

[Bobby Kelly]

That's a Jacob. Give her the crispy one.

[Big J Okerson]

Hang on a second.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, I don't want her thinking Bobby's a good one because he went home and forced cookies on his family.

[Big J Okerson]

Did not force them. First of all, it's called Kelly cookies. Can you give her a Kelly cookie, please?

[Bobby Kelly]

What's that? Black glue? These are intamins, they're not entamins. I have a quick question about these cookies though, Bobby. I got home at around 8:05. What time did you get home?

[Jacob]

Here it is.

[Big J Okerson]

What.

[Bobby Kelly]

What time did you get home? Because it seems like you posted that pretty fast.

[Big J Okerson]

And you know, you got to get.

[Bobby Kelly]

Home, you got to actually put the dough together, then you gotta bake it. Yeah, he's like, yeah, 17 hours ago. 17 hours ago from where? It's now 18 on his time, on his story.

[Jacob]

Did you go to Jay's after the show?

[Bobby Kelly]

Really?

[Big J Okerson]

Hang on, really quick.

[Bobby Kelly]

18 hours ago from now was 9:05pm yeah. And I got home at you notice. Hang on.

[Big J Okerson]

I go home at 8:10.

[Bobby Kelly]

The story. The story he's telling us behind this, by the way, is not indicated in what he po. What he posted. He just said tonight with. I'm with the family.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, tonight with the fam.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'm a good one.

[Big J Okerson]

I'M a good one.

[Bobby Kelly]

It says nothing about like, made cookies with the family. Because you know then your. Your family would call you out for being a liar.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm gonna say something right now.

[Bobby Kelly]

What's up? Say it with your thumb. Pussies.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm a snake.

[Bobby Kelly]

Pussies.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm going to say it right now.

[Bobby Kelly]

I take you more serious like that.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm gonna tell you right now. I'm still a man. I'm not making.

[Bobby Kelly]

God damn right. You.

[Big J Okerson]

You get the cookie dough. I paid for the cookie dough. I paid for the cookie dough. Then the cookie dough was there. Then we put the cookies in the oven and made the cookies. All right. So did I. Did I get the cookies done and more. And then. And all of a sudden counted together? No. Max was dealing with some girl problems. I was doing some guy stuff and Don was. And then the cookies went in and they came out.

[Bobby Kelly]

You're having an internal battle. First of all, you're playing to the camera, which is strange. Who's this for? You're just yelling at Black Lou.

[Big J Okerson]

No, I'm not. That's. That's you.

[Bobby Kelly]

You were giving it right to the people.

[Big J Okerson]

That's for the people. That's for the people.

[Bobby Kelly]

Listen, you're. You're fighting an internal war that's unnecessary. Okay? This cookie bullshit.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

That's you trying to be sucked back down by your family into this fucking Katona lawn jockey that they want you to be. You are a sleeve pussy wearing, macabre, no bullshit fuck machine.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

And they don't understand that a cyberpunks can't just be fucking sitting with his thumb up his ass in Katona all day.

[Big J Okerson]

Goddamn right, Jay. You know what?

[Bobby Kelly]

Thumb sleeves got to be out there.

[Big J Okerson]

Stick those cookies in your sleeve pussy. How's that? You're right.

[Bobby Kelly]

Shove those cookies in your sleeve pussy. These hunks of shit.

[Big J Okerson]

Give Christine one though.

[Bobby Kelly]

They really are delicious. They really are good, though. I can't argue. Yes. That all of them. What'd you say?

[Christine]

You have this one?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, that's the one I got.

[Big J Okerson]

Wow. We are just gay.

[Bobby Kelly]

Don't you say that.

[Big J Okerson]

We dress gay. We want to be gay. We're not gay, but we wish we could be gay.

[Bobby Kelly]

Now, I like the one, but I hate that. It's called the lollipop studded belt. Now it seemed like the one I wanted out of the gates, but I don't know if I could order that comfortably.

[Big J Okerson]

But he get that. Get that right now.

[Bobby Kelly]

The lollipop one.

[Big J Okerson]

You get the. Get the Lollipop one. Because the pink, it's a little hidden. Pink.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

You know what I mean.

[Christine]

He's like the gayest guy in the world.

[Bobby Kelly]

No. No. Then get it. Well, make sure the belt doesn't come with anything. Goes in me, I engage them more. Six reviews. Let's read those reviews, please.

[Big J Okerson]

Luke, can you grab a cookie and pass them on, please? There's other people in this place. Thanks.

[Bobby Kelly]

The goat. Hang on. What? This is lip oil.

[Big J Okerson]

It is.

[Bobby Kelly]

Wait. I love the new Jeffree Star belt. It's awesome. It fits perfectly, and it's made with such great quality and care. Definitely getting another one. This took me back to high school and the first time I've seen Jeffree Star's music videos. Super cute, amazing quality. This brand always slays on whatever they put out. I want to wear a belt that slays.

[Big J Okerson]

Sounds like something you'd say.

[Christine]

Yeah, definitely slays. This is him.

[Bobby Kelly]

Okay.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, God.

[Bobby Kelly]

I didn't know it was Norton's wife.

[Big J Okerson]

You can't. You can't get that. You can't get that belt.

[Bobby Kelly]

Why?

[Big J Okerson]

You can't get that belt. Dude.

[Christine]

There's no way he has a ranch in Wyoming now.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, he's got a ranch.

[Christine]

So, Jacob, more of a cowboy than you.

[Bobby Kelly]

Jacob, this is more of a cowboy than you. How do you feel about that?

[Jacob]

I don't know about that.

[Bobby Kelly]

You want to bet?

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

Actually has a ranch in Wyoming.

[Big J Okerson]

His ranch. Justin shows up.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yes.

[Big J Okerson]

Twice a month and trains his dogs. And they put on.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, they put on a little dog feeder.

[Jacob]

He has an alt ranch.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah. I'm sure his ranch doesn't have farm animals.

[Christine]

He raises yaks.

[Bobby Kelly]

He raises yaks? Yeah. Fierce yaks.

[Christine]

With his fierce yaks.

[Big J Okerson]

Fierce yaks?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, Fierce ass yaks.

[Big J Okerson]

He doesn't raise yaks. Somebody raises the yaks for him.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'm living. Totes goats.

[Big J Okerson]

You can't go. You can't raise a yak in that outfit. No, you're not. You're gonna ruin this. No, you're gonna get yak all over this.

[Bobby Kelly]

By the way, pretty sure me and Jeffree Star wearing the same pants in that picture right there to the right, in the pink with the bowl. The one that's highlighted. Nope. The main one. You have up. You're getting it.

[Big J Okerson]

Is this him? Is this his song?

[Christine]

Oh, he is in a pink Adidas tracksuit.

[Bobby Kelly]

Nice.

[Big J Okerson]

Why do we not. Why did we. What the. Wow.

[Bobby Kelly]

What did you ask? Why we never heard this before? No, it came into our algorithm. When you put your thumbs through those sleeve guys Kissing on the dance floor. Wearing tight pants and kissing on the dance floor.

[Big J Okerson]

Why don't we put a pink belt? Why don't we have a. Why don't we have a disco, hip, gay song like this?

[Bobby Kelly]

I know. Like what? Like Dexter. Dexter made a hit. Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

We should make a hit, dude. Me, you, we write it. DJ Lou produces it. We throw it out. We'll make. We'll become billionaires in Japan.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. What do we like? Let's get some lyrics. I just want to dance. Party till your penis pops. I like the alliteration of that.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, sticky.

[Bobby Kelly]

Party to your penis pops.

[Big J Okerson]

Put your thumbs in my pussy holes.

[Bobby Kelly]

Put your thumbs in my sleeve, pussies. Trademark.

[Big J Okerson]

Trademark. Now, is he a guy or is he a guy that dress. Is he transferred?

[Christine]

I don't think he's.

[Big J Okerson]

Or is just a dude that dresses Crazy.

[Christine]

Yeah, I think he just does hair and makeup. I don't think he, like, considers himself.

[Bobby Kelly]

Do you think every penis in that room smells like farts, Jacob? Yeah, it's a real question. I'm going around the horn, guys. It's like. Pardon the interruption. Okay, Take up your thought. This guy's penises smell like farts. Black glue your thoughts on this?

[Big J Okerson]

You have 30 seconds, go.

[Bobby Kelly]

You have 30 seconds. Go.

[Big J Okerson]

30 seconds, go.

[Bobby Kelly]

Okay, fact check. Everyone's penis did smell like farts in that room.

[Big J Okerson]

How many? Is this song like a huge hit?

[Bobby Kelly]

It is now.

[Big J Okerson]

Look at this old white dude. Looks like a. A roll on.

[Bobby Kelly]

That's the guy.

[Big J Okerson]

We're gonna party like it's prom night.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, this thing wasn't accepted at prom night?

[Big J Okerson]

No, of course not.

[Bobby Kelly]

She's like, how did you guys party on prom night? I was 16 years old dating a 50 year old guy for money. We're gonna party. Gets prom night. Holy shit. What happened? I was 15 being turned out by a 50 year old.

[Big J Okerson]

He was teaching me.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, my asshole was blasted out by the time I was 18 years old. I don't know how nothing rhymes with that. So can someone help me with the song? Nothing. Nothing rhymes with gang bang my shit pipe.

[Big J Okerson]

I don't like it. Black Lou really fucking investigated my cookies.

[Bobby Kelly]

I can't believe you lied to all of us.

[Big J Okerson]

How are the cookies, though?

[Bobby Kelly]

Phenomenal. Dawn is a great cook and baker.

[Big J Okerson]

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. I'm part of that?

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, yeah. Yeah. He held the trade.

[Big J Okerson]

Did you make the cookies?

[Bobby Kelly]

The oatmeal, peanut butter cookies?

[Big J Okerson]

Absolutely. You rolled out the stuff?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yes.

[Big J Okerson]

You put the sugar in the bowl?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yes.

[Big J Okerson]

You mixed it up.

[Bobby Kelly]

Mix it up you put it as a family in black history month, only the black men are allowed to control peanut butter. You know that.

[Big J Okerson]

That's true.

[Bobby Kelly]

You've been known that.

[Big J Okerson]

Give yourself a black pivot for the. Been known it.

[Bobby Kelly]

You know what? I'm gonna take myself a black piven for that. Now I may have to give us black pivot back because I believe Christine just ordered me that gay belt, so. All right. That was fun while it lasted.

[Big J Okerson]

Did you really order him that belt?

[Christine]

Do you want the belt?

[Big J Okerson]

Wow.

[Bobby Kelly]

Why? Are you gonna put it on me? I thought you just did. And I was gonna be like, well, Christine ordered it, so what?

[Big J Okerson]

What?

[Christine]

Don't you have so much weight? I don't know what size to order. I kind of want to measure your other belts.

[Bobby Kelly]

You don't know either.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, you do order. You got to order big. You can get a cut if it's too big.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, with the. Not when it has the spikies on it like that.

[Big J Okerson]

Take it downtown to my belt lady. When I was fat, I had my own belt lady. Downt seller. She. She suggests any belt and she'll make you your own belts.

[Bobby Kelly]

The fattest thing you've ever humiliating as. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was really. You should have told me that. I have an elastic guy down downtown. I got a guy that makes all my pants in the sweatpants. No matter what kind of pants.

[Big J Okerson]

I couldn't get bells when I was. When I was really fat, I couldn't get a leather belt that was thick enough. And I mean, buying a belt when you're fat is probably the worst feeling in the world. When you're at a place. You're in Canada at the bay, you need a belt and nothing fits.

[Bobby Kelly]

I also need a belt so bad because of my lack of ass that if I own a belt for a week, it doesn't matter if it's jeffree star or something from walmart. It looks like a dog's been chewing on it because it's just getting yanked and cranked and pulled. And then I need to go as tight as possible so it keeps my pants above my ass. Oh, it's a nightmare.

[Big J Okerson]

I got the new anchor belt.

[Bobby Kelly]

Christine, get those cookie lies off the screen, please.

[Big J Okerson]

Look at. That's not a cookie lie. It's a cookie lie of it.

[Bobby Kelly]

You weren't a part of it.

[Big J Okerson]

I was part of making.

[Bobby Kelly]

You're too cyberpunk to live like that. I am.

[Big J Okerson]

You're right. Look at this belt right here.

[Bobby Kelly]

Have the same belt.

[Big J Okerson]

You got the anchor belt with elastic.

[Bobby Kelly]

I like that belt fanoia. Put me onto it.

[Big J Okerson]

Dude, these belts, I. That's all I have.

[Bobby Kelly]

Magnet, right? The magnet buckle.

[Big J Okerson]

It's not. I don't have the magnet buckle.

[Bobby Kelly]

Mine's a magnet buckle.

[Big J Okerson]

Well, I'm too scared of a magnet. I don't think there's a strong enough magnet.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, I thought you were saying you were. It's going to give you like radiation of the penis or something.

[Big J Okerson]

No, I just don't think there's a magnet that will hold it. When I sit down, I don't want it to flop off and hit the lady's tit next to me.

[Bobby Kelly]

I do get worried my cock piercing is gonna rip straight out of my body like an mri.

[Big J Okerson]

Dude, you have a cock piercing?

[Bobby Kelly]

Huh?

[Big J Okerson]

Do you have a cock piercing?

[Bobby Kelly]

Come on. Do you have a. Yes.

[Big J Okerson]

You have a cock piercing?

[Bobby Kelly]

2. I got these hoops next to my dinger.

[Big J Okerson]

No, you don't.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, I don't.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, God damn it.

[Bobby Kelly]

I would never pierce my penis.

[Big J Okerson]

Damn it.

[Bobby Kelly]

Unless I put like a 10 pound weight on the end of it to keep it always dangled. Nice.

[Big J Okerson]

Can't you do that? Can you put a thing on your penis to make your thing longer?

[Bobby Kelly]

They say that it.

[Big J Okerson]

Let's try it.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, I can't have Christine walk into a room while I'm holding up anvils with my.

[Big J Okerson]

We don't do that. We do it, you know, we do it alone. Alone. Me together. Your brand new shed house. Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, I could have a dick dangle room.

[Big J Okerson]

Could have a dick.

[Bobby Kelly]

I think I've earned that. I have a cedar closet. We can. We can lengthen our dicks in if you want.

[Big J Okerson]

Do you have a cedar closet?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

Wow, that's nice.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's for jackets.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah. So the moths don't get in there. They don't like the cedar.

[Bobby Kelly]

Nice.

[Big J Okerson]

And you can also make it into a humidor if you smoke. Yeah. Cedar. If you smoke cigars.

[Bobby Kelly]

Christine, can we make it for coats and cigars?

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah. And.

[Bobby Kelly]

And oh, and also sleeve pussies. Sleeve pussies for our prototypes, you see.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

I don't want them getting out there. Jacob would steal this in two seconds. It'd be good.

[Big J Okerson]

T shirt. Kevin. Sleeve pussies. I want the sleeve pussies to look like pussies.

[Bobby Kelly]

If they could.

[Big J Okerson]

Two different pussies, though. I don't want the same pussy on each sleeve.

[Bobby Kelly]

Well, I think you should make it different shirts. No, no, I think each sleeve's got symmetry on the pussy.

[Big J Okerson]

Can I do this?

[Bobby Kelly]

But you could also have ones got, like, more like, put, like, almost ruffles around it. Like a really lippy pussy.

[Big J Okerson]

Let's make it really internal. Let's get a picture of Christine's pussy, a picture of Don's pussy, and it'll be their pussies. They'll be their pussies. Christy on the left, don't be on the right.

[Bobby Kelly]

I like that. When I was a kid, there was a sneaker store we all went to was called Sneaky Pete's. And it was a picture of a little boy's eyes peeking out of a sneaker. And then I went to summer camp with Sneaky Pete. The reason they only showed his eyes, everything else would let you know he was retarded. He was a retarded boy. Poor Sneaky Pete.

[Big J Okerson]

I thought you were gonna see he was getting molested.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, no, no.

[Big J Okerson]

From beneath.

[Bobby Kelly]

I mean, if he did, you wouldn't believe him. But he lived in a sneaker, apparently.

[Big J Okerson]

Sneaky Pete, that's very sneaky. He's always stealing cookies.

[Bobby Kelly]

He's a little Sneaky Pete, that Pete. DJ Lou. I know. I don't want to get away from this because we're gonna keep pushing this down the road this week, but you went to go see New Edition.

[DJ Lou]

I did.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's a big moment. It sounds like. I love New Edition. You know that you are okay with New Edition?

[DJ Lou]

Yeah, I'm a little less okay now.

[Bobby Kelly]

Less okay. Okay. I like to hear this. Bobby, New Edition is a black singing.

[Big J Okerson]

I know. It is. From Boston. I know.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, but you think they're. You just call them black nuggets in the block. Their name's New Edition.

[Big J Okerson]

I mean, they came out first. They were first, and then they. The same guy, like Elvis, same guy who actually did New Edition, got New Kids in the Block and just replicated the same thing.

[Bobby Kelly]

I want to believe so bad that you auditioned for every Boston boy band when you were younger.

[Big J Okerson]

No, I didn't know them, though. I knew the outskirts of them.

[Bobby Kelly]

Well, if they would have. If you would have showed up with your fucking sleeve pussies, you'd be in I really. Wahlberg, Kelly Knight. What's the other name? Wood.

[Big J Okerson]

I actually follow night on Instagram.

[Bobby Kelly]

Which one? The gay one or the gay one?

[Big J Okerson]

The less gayer one.

[Bobby Kelly]

Well, funny enough, the actual gay one is the less gayer one.

[Big J Okerson]

No, I followed the gayer one. I felt.

[Bobby Kelly]

Right. Jordan.

[Big J Okerson]

Jordan is. But he's not really gay. He's married. Right. Or is he gay?

[Bobby Kelly]

What does that mean? Elton John was married.

[Big J Okerson]

Yes. So am I. So are you.

[Bobby Kelly]

True.

[Big J Okerson]

You have a pink belt and I have sleeve pussies.

[Bobby Kelly]

I know. I left my wife and then hooked up with the most masculine woman I could find. Christine.

[Big J Okerson]

I married a tough broad, too.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, I know. She bullies you right out of your sleeve pussies. But no more. No, those days are past.

[Big J Okerson]

No, I'm gonna. I'm gonna start sleeve pussying it up.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm gonna sleep.

[Bobby Kelly]

I just fucking fire Christine's ass up to Catona and have you come move in with me, buddy. We would dominate in that house.

[Big J Okerson]

You know how happy they'd be? You know happy Christine would be the. Both the dogs would be happy. Oh, yeah, they would be happy. They'd probably start some crafty thing.

[Bobby Kelly]

Just frigid dog ladies.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, they get some type of taking.

[Bobby Kelly]

Care of a little fucking horny kid.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, they'd probably get into real estate and just make millions up there selling real estate to famous people.

[Bobby Kelly]

And Max will probably whack off to you because you're not his real mom.

[Big J Okerson]

First of all, Max is coming with us.

[Bobby Kelly]

Huh?

[Big J Okerson]

Max is coming with us.

[Bobby Kelly]

Not yet.

[Big J Okerson]

Come on.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, let's get him, like, 17, 18, where we don't feel bad about what he's gonna see.

[Big J Okerson]

16, 17.

[Bobby Kelly]

Okay.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, I'm gonna ease him into it.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, no. Yeah. 16, 17.

[Big J Okerson]

16, 17.

[Bobby Kelly]

Go around.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

And be like, max, you wanna come have dinner with dad and Jay tonight? We have a girl coming over. Just to squirt while we watch.

[Big J Okerson]

Yep. Can I make a suggestion? Don't fix the pool. Keep it four feet so these chicks don't drown.

[Bobby Kelly]

We don't want these chicks to be.

[Big J Okerson]

Nah, keep it four feet. Don't get a deep end.

[Bobby Kelly]

Also, our wieners are always out in the pool.

[Big J Okerson]

Then bingo.

[Bobby Kelly]

You know what I mean?

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah. Always have it out nice and neat.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, I like it.

[Bobby Kelly]

Just bottomless shrugs with sleeve pussies. I'm not swimming without that. I'll never swim in a T shirt, but I will swim in a shrug with sleeve pussies. You think I won't? That's right. I forgot. We were talking about New Edition with Lou. We trailed off. You went to go see them because your black girlfriend.

[DJ Lou]

Yes.

[Bobby Kelly]

So you had to.

[DJ Lou]

She loves them. And we went to Las Vegas to the Wind to see them at the Encore theater.

[Bobby Kelly]

And you had to find out why she keeps calling you Candy Girl. Did you find out?

[DJ Lou]

I found out why. She loves Ralph Tresvant.

[Bobby Kelly]

Everyone loves Ralph. Because that voice dude. Yeah, he's an angel.

[DJ Lou]

Couldn't Keep his shirt on, like slowly unbuttoning.

[Bobby Kelly]

And he looked good.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah. Did he sing good? He sang great.

[DJ Lou]

He danced great.

[Bobby Kelly]

He still has that high pitched voice, huh?

[DJ Lou]

No, he can't hit all the highs, but he's, he's. He's probably the best one there.

[Bobby Kelly]

Did he do his solo song, Sensitivity.

[DJ Lou]

Oh, that's your favorite.

[Bobby Kelly]

Because that would have came. Put it on. Don't need a man there to give you the money. Yeah, you need a man with sensitivity. A man.

[DJ Lou]

The all female crowd went apeshit for him.

[Bobby Kelly]

All female? You?

[DJ Lou]

Yeah, me.

[Big J Okerson]

All female.

[Bobby Kelly]

Were you.

[Big J Okerson]

Were they grabbing your juicy butt while you're out there? No, they weren't.

[DJ Lou]

There's Ralph.

[Big J Okerson]

Wow.

[Bobby Kelly]

DJ Lou, little focus grouping here, if you don't mind. Before you tell your whole story. Would this have been better if you had sleep pussies?

[DJ Lou]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

Okay. All right. Say no more.

[DJ Lou]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

Okay.

[Big J Okerson]

Hold your hand up like this. Isn't it better?

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, my God. You'd be like Bobby Brown, throw me crack.

[Big J Okerson]

We should get little things hanging off little sparkly, like fringe.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yes.

[Big J Okerson]

Just a little bit on the end. So when you do this at a.

[Bobby Kelly]

Concert, but only for concerts. Sleeve.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

During the day, you don't want to walk around the city like that. It's too much. Too much. Just like that. You let people know you don't take.

[Big J Okerson]

No on stage, though. If I'm holding a microphone with a little. Little fringe. Sleeve.

[Bobby Kelly]

Sleeve is going to change your stage pictures for the bet. You're going to love it so much because people are going to go, they look again. They go, something's different. Oh, this guy's got sleep. Okay, so you were talking to. Going out to Vegas to see. Solely for the situation. Going to see New Edition.

[DJ Lou]

Right.

[Bobby Kelly]

For Valentine's Day, you were down because you like sex with ethnic people.

[DJ Lou]

That's right.

[Bobby Kelly]

Okay. All right. I'm just trying to catch everybody up who might not be aware what's going on. It is Black History Month. You have to do whatever you're told. You had to go to see New Edition in Las Vegas. The blackest event humanly possible. Is there an opening act?

[DJ Lou]

No. And it's $550 per ticket.

[Bobby Kelly]

Is that.

[Big J Okerson]

Wow.

[DJ Lou]

Which is the most I've ever steal for a single lesson.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's less than $100 per member of the band.

[Big J Okerson]

Is this. Is this a tour or is this like a residency? Oh, that's cool.

[DJ Lou]

So there's a lot of laziness. The wind, the encore.

[Bobby Kelly]

You can't get him on a bus with Their sciaticas and all their old black ailments. Two of them have the sugars.

[Jacob]

Is there one. One show a night or two?

[DJ Lou]

But if you'll see two a night, you'll see. Yeah, there's two a night. But you'll see the sluggishness of one particular member and you'll be like, there's no way he's getting through another show.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's Bobby Brown. Yeah.

[Jacob]

So you went to the early show.

[Big J Okerson]

He sucked back when they were a hit.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. It's amazing that he's still alive.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, he was not good during the prime of New Edition.

[Bobby Kelly]

Probably Brown, the most notorious crackhead in that whole family, and Whitney Houston, their child, and Whitney Houston's mom all die before Bobby Brown. That's my favorite Tony Roberts joke. See if you could find that Christine. You know what I'm talking about. When they kill the wrong people. So funny.

[DJ Lou]

Bobby could kind of sing still, but you don't think he's gonna make it. Rooting for him to stay alive.

[Big J Okerson]

Do you think that Keith stole this for Comedy Express?

[Bobby Kelly]

Absolutely.

[Big J Okerson]

It's very similar.

[Bobby Kelly]

Absolutely. Honest to God. See if you could find the interview with Michael Bivens where he says his mom kicked him out because he. She wouldn't. He left because she wouldn't let him kill the cat. So he packed up his Pampers and hit for the road. And then Comedy Express was born. God, it really was worth for Keith when he could talk. Is this it? This is so funny.

[Big J Okerson]

Michael Jackson dead. He believe this shit. I still can't get over that shit. Michael Jackson dead. Bobby Brown living. What the fuck is that about?

[Bobby Kelly]

My favorite.

[Big J Okerson]

This dead and this alive. Where was he leaving? People, we don't need Flavor Flav still here. Ray Parker Jr. What the. He still doing? They've been doing this for years. They done shot Martin Luther King and left Jesse Jackson on the Goddamn baby. We don't need no Jack and Jackson. Martin Luther King had a dream. Jackson didn't even go to sleep that night. I'm just saying. Jesus, we need to have a meeting first.

[Bobby Kelly]

That's so funny.

[Big J Okerson]

He was at Skag Fest. I was on a show with him. Yeah, yeah, yeah, he's great.

[Christine]

He's doing a big tour with Mike Eps I saw.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, yeah, they're doing. They're doing like a big compilation tour. I just.

[Big J Okerson]

I hate those scally caps that seem like they're painted on your head.

[Bobby Kelly]

So, Lou, you walk into the theater, you're. Are you seeing the first show or the second show of the Night, the first show. Okay.

[Big J Okerson]

Are people looking at you like, are they, like, asking you questions like, where to seat? Like, where's my seat? Like, are they like.

[Bobby Kelly]

Are they looking at you like one of you or your girlfriend is fetishizing the other one and just shaking their.

[Big J Okerson]

Head no, like, you're like an usher, like.

[DJ Lou]

Well, I wore a suit.

[Big J Okerson]

You wore a suit? Was it. Was it. Was it like a pink suit or like, did it have shoulder pads?

[DJ Lou]

A blue suit?

[Bobby Kelly]

You're wrapped up in the fact that it's. What color suit? You wore a suit to a concert.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, but look at. Yeah, you wore a new edition suit.

[Christine]

I know that you have pictures of you and your suit.

[DJ Lou]

It's on there.

[Christine]

It's in there. Okay.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, God.

[Jacob]

Was this like, you have dinner there or you're just a theater?

[DJ Lou]

We had dinner at the Yellowstone. Pop up the guy who runs Yellowstone.

[Big J Okerson]

There we go. Oh, my God. You dress like kings of comedy.

[DJ Lou]

Thank you.

[Bobby Kelly]

Holy.

[Big J Okerson]

You're a pimp.

[Bobby Kelly]

DJ Lou the Entertainer.

[Jacob]

I did not.

[Big J Okerson]

Stand up, buddy. You're a pimp. Is that a pink Kango?

[Bobby Kelly]

Are you wearing a skull cap underneath your Kango hat?

[DJ Lou]

No.

[Bobby Kelly]

So your waves stay good?

[DJ Lou]

No, that's just the. See, it's just the.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh. Gotcha. Gotcha.

[Christine]

You don't have a full body shot of this outfit.

[Big J Okerson]

Yes, you do.

[DJ Lou]

I'll send it.

[Christine]

Send it.

[Bobby Kelly]

What about when you got on stage and got to cry while they danced on you? Didn't Ralph Chesman take his shirt off and dance over you in a chair like this?

[DJ Lou]

Oh, man. I was so jealous of that.

[Bobby Kelly]

Fucking meet a man.

[Christine]

You're jealous of the performer?

[Big J Okerson]

She was loving it.

[DJ Lou]

She was going ape.

[Bobby Kelly]

Easy, Lou. Easy. Hang on. Whoa. She was going crazy. We'll take crazy. We'll accept crazy. We'll put that in post.

[Big J Okerson]

What the.

[Bobby Kelly]

Man, this guy's getting too comfortable.

[Big J Okerson]

Someone. Someone needs a.

[Bobby Kelly]

We're going to go back to her house for some monkey business. Lou, think about what you're saying. Please stop.

[Christine]

I want to say we have. Have Candy Girl. Don't be cruel. The entrance for Candy Girl. If it isn't love, it says playlist.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, you damn right.

[Big J Okerson]

My prerogative. Bobby Brown.

[DJ Lou]

There you go.

[Big J Okerson]

See? Bobby Brown.

[Bobby Kelly]

Wait, did this do a solo?

[DJ Lou]

Yeah, everybody did their solo stuff.

[Christine]

I love this song.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, he's not even moving.

[Bobby Kelly]

Do you know, I've known this song my whole life and everything. Been to the Arguments and just found out officially the other day that it's prerogative. Pre what?

[DJ Lou]

No, it's Not.

[Big J Okerson]

What are you talking about?

[Bobby Kelly]

Optical illusion you've been seeing your whole life. The word is spelled prerogative.

[Big J Okerson]

Prerogative.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'm right.

[Christine]

Yeah, like prego.

[Big J Okerson]

It's pr.

[Bobby Kelly]

Prerogative.

[Big J Okerson]

Prerogative. Not prerogative.

[Bobby Kelly]

I heard somebody. I heard somebody correct someone else on this in front of me recently. And I did the chuckle of like, can you believe this? Didn't know it. And then just ingested the information. And now I will do that to others. But I'm giving you guys first dibs. To be able to be this kind of a. With me, it's prerogative. So now you have. Then if you're listening right now, you have that make people feel small and stupid when they don't know things. It's the best.

[Big J Okerson]

You do like doing that.

[Bobby Kelly]

I do.

[Big J Okerson]

You do.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. Nice spelling face. And then I just walk off. I don't spell good either.

[Big J Okerson]

You can't type.

[Bobby Kelly]

Can't type. I'll attack your body if it's better than mine. I don't give a nice body. Dork.

[Jacob]

I mean, the video we're watching. He's Bobby Brown, can hardly move, and there's 20 girls in their 20s, I tell you who. Providing the excitement.

[Big J Okerson]

Keith Robinson moves better than Bobby Brown.

[Bobby Kelly]

You're not wrong about that.

[Jacob]

But it's such a contrast. He looks worse because they're so useful.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, look, Amy Schumer's coming out to pick his microphone stand up.

[Big J Okerson]

Well, now, this is at what? This is at the win.

[Bobby Kelly]

He's got stroke arm.

[Big J Okerson]

He can't even sing.

[Bobby Kelly]

Points.

[DJ Lou]

He would do a little bit of a dance, and the whole crowd would go, go, Bobby.

[Big J Okerson]

Go, Bobby.

[DJ Lou]

And then he would stop immediately because he was winded.

[Big J Okerson]

He used to get winded in his prime, though.

[Bobby Kelly]

No. Yeah, when he was good to good. The good to go solo. Are you out of your mind?

[Big J Okerson]

Couldn't breathe.

[Bobby Kelly]

No. You're crazy.

[Big J Okerson]

100%. Go back and watch his videos. He. He would be hyper.

[Bobby Kelly]

Every little step. Bring up every little step and let it roll. And if it doesn't have the rap part, I'm gonna burn the studio down.

[DJ Lou]

That was the only song I really wanted to hear, and he did not play it.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh. Even with the rap part, Nothing did he do on our own from Ghostbusters.

[DJ Lou]

I wanted that, too.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, that's Bobby Browner's good to good to good to go solo. Yeah.

[DJ Lou]

He didn't have.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, no, no. That's not what he says in that one. What's that? What's the funny line? In that? Yeah, you know it.

[DJ Lou]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's time to take control.

[DJ Lou]

He did Rony.

[Bobby Kelly]

You know it. Tenderoni.

[Big J Okerson]

I like Tenderoni.

[DJ Lou]

He got. He did one hump into the air and got tired. No, I didn't do humping around.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh. Just on Tenderoni.

[DJ Lou]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

Well, now, were they all Dan. Did they dance together?

[DJ Lou]

Yeah, they danced together. But Bobby would. Often he took a break in the second song. He left this stage to go get oxygen or whatever he was doing.

[Big J Okerson]

You mean maybe coke? Dude, he couldn't make it.

[DJ Lou]

He couldn't make it, but took a.

[Big J Okerson]

Bite of a sandwich, nice sniff. Came back, where's my blt?

[Bobby Kelly]

Where's my pastrami and my cocaine?

[DJ Lou]

And Johnny Gill did not care about the synchronized dancing either. He barely made like. He just didn't care.

[Bobby Kelly]

But my, my, my, my.

[DJ Lou]

I'll tell you, Bell, Biv, Devo was on it and carrying the whole thing.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, they still need the money.

[DJ Lou]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

Bell, Biv and Devo.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, they were great. Now Bobby Brown has got what's her name?

[Bobby Kelly]

Money.

[Big J Okerson]

Right? Whitney. Whitney's money.

[Bobby Kelly]

Better say we're of the rep, huh?

[Big J Okerson]

Does Bobby have Whitney's money?

[Bobby Kelly]

No.

[DJ Lou]

No, that was.

[Jacob]

Well, who does?

[Christine]

They were divorced before.

[Jacob]

Oh.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, they were.

[Bobby Kelly]

Died.

[Big J Okerson]

So he didn't get anything from her?

[Bobby Kelly]

No.

[Big J Okerson]

You sure?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. Well, maybe the daughter's dead, so maybe like he gets some of the money residually from that or it goes to the Whitney foundation to bring drugs to under British children.

[Christine]

Okay, I put with rap, and this came up.

[Big J Okerson]

No, you got to do live. You got to do live. Watch him live, and he's out of breath all the time.

[Bobby Kelly]

This better be from back in the day.

[Big J Okerson]

What was that?

[Bobby Kelly]

That's a joke. Let's see. What from three years ago. Nope. No, no. Go back up top. It's right there.

[Christine]

Right here?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yes. The AMAs see it. $20,000 right now. Jacob says he's lip singing. Jacob. $20,000.

[Big J Okerson]

Bobby Brown was cool, though. I mean, Bobby Brown, that was pretty badass.

[Bobby Kelly]

Look at that. Dance moves.

[Big J Okerson]

But I want to do that so bad with my thumb.

[Jacob]

Lou, he did none of this.

[DJ Lou]

Nothing.

[Big J Okerson]

Can't march around like a fat ass.

[DJ Lou]

He goes, I know I'm still in that movie.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's the way that I want to live. I swear to God, guys, if I don't hear the rap from every little step, I'm gonna freak out. Christine, I really don't give a damn. My name is Bobby and not Uncle Sam. This guy could move back in the day.

[Big J Okerson]

Back in the day could look at those legs.

[Bobby Kelly]

All right, that's plenty. Back to New Edition.

[Big J Okerson]

He was. I mean, that shit. When he came out solo, he was really good.

[Bobby Kelly]

It made Whitney Houston start doing crack cocaine. That's how talented he was. He took America's black princess and turned her out into a crack addict. Doing interviews while on crack, she was always sweating. Crack is whack.

[Big J Okerson]

Crack is whack.

[Bobby Kelly]

You have any crack is whack when you don't have it.

[Big J Okerson]

He made that haircut too, the. What is that called? The slant.

[Bobby Kelly]

The Gumby. Now, what's funny about the Gumby haircut? Also what he did was when I went to go buy MC Hammer pants, they were the one.

[Big J Okerson]

You had to go to an actual parachute facility. You had to go to a plane.

[Bobby Kelly]

Jay, why do you have a presidential seal on your fucking MC Hammer pants? Oh, I.

[Big J Okerson]

Why does it have. Why do you have an Air Force logo?

[Bobby Kelly]

I. No, the MC Hammers were really expensive.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

And so at City Blue little jean store in Philly, we were able to get. They just had a cutout picture of Bobby Brown, like jumping in the air wearing big baggy pants like that. And they were sold as Bobby Brown pants. So I always still call them MC Hammer pants. But technically what I bought was Bobby was Bobby Brown pants. Either way, my parents laughed them off me the day I got them.

[Big J Okerson]

I got mine at towards the end. I always got mine towards the end because I didn't have enough confidence to do it when people were doing it.

[Bobby Kelly]

I got mine like sleeve or fingerless gloves like myself.

[Big J Okerson]

Right. I got mine at Pier 1 Imports.

[Bobby Kelly]

Really?

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

I see Hammer pants, they were linen.

[Big J Okerson]

And they sold them.

[Bobby Kelly]

Are those Hammer pants?

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, they were linen with the.

[Bobby Kelly]

They had the crotch down here.

[Big J Okerson]

Crotch down here. I got three pair all. I got green like an olive. The green. I got linen and I got a blue pair at. Yeah, like those. At pair. One import like this.

[Bobby Kelly]

What's so funny is Paco dresses like this.

[Big J Okerson]

Currently they were. No, they were more like MC Hammer.

[Bobby Kelly]

Look up MC Hammer pants. Well, I'll tell you the difference between MC Hammer pants and Bobby Brown pants. MC Hammer pants had like a waist, like a. Like a black thick like waistband. The Bobby Browns were just drawstring. And then my grandmother and her and my Aunt Anita also bought. They bought the. Those color MC hat were Bobby brown pants pants to walk around the schoolyard in for exercise. And then once in a while I have to explain to my friends why my grandmother and Aunt Anita were wearing MC Hammer pants.

[Big J Okerson]

I had those blue I was getting exercise and then they went. Didn't the MC Hammer pants go to. Kind of redneck guys started wearing them. The. The.

[Bobby Kelly]

Now you're going. Now you're thinking Zubaz.

[Big J Okerson]

What's a Zubaz?

[Bobby Kelly]

That's. That's what that those purple ones are becoming. Zubaz.

[Big J Okerson]

Zubaz. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

That's Zubaz.

[Big J Okerson]

That's a Zubaz. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. This song, that's like a.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's all good.

[Jacob]

I love this song. This is the song Tommy Lee played on the boat. This is where I. I know the song from. I know. I love this song.

[Bobby Kelly]

Wasn't the ending of his album, the Funky Headhunter.

[Jacob]

I remember Bobby, that he was enjoying life so much. Tommy Lee, he goes, yeah, baby, it's all good while the song's playing. And that always stuck in my head more than anything else.

[Big J Okerson]

When you get off the plane in Florida and you feel the heat, is that where you yell out when you get right. When you're right in the tunnel getting back in? Yeah, baby, it's all good.

[Jacob]

He's on a boat banging Pamela Anderson, steering with his penis. And he says, that song's playing. And he goes, yeah, baby, it's all good. Like, of course.

[Big J Okerson]

What's not good? Don't forget the size of his penis.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Jacob]

Oh, no.

[Big J Okerson]

I mean, come on. That's all good. Wow. Incredible. Amazing.

[Bobby Kelly]

Lumify Redness Reliever. Eye drops really work.

[Big J Okerson]

They dramatically reduce redness in one minute. I love how my eyes look whiter and brighter.

[Bobby Kelly]

And it lasts for up to eight hours. They make my eyes look refreshed.

[Big J Okerson]

Lumify.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's kind of amazing. It was love at first sight with Lumify. Try it for yourself. Learn more@lumify eyes.com.

[Big J Okerson]

At Ameca Insurance we know it's more than just a car. It's the two door coupe that was there for your first drive. The hatchback that took you cross country and back, and the minivan that tackles the weekly carpool for the cars you couldn't live without. Trust Amica Auto Insurance. Amiga Empathy is our best policy.