One Spoon of RZA

Summary

The Bonfire w/ Big Jay Oakerson & Robert Kelly

Episode: "One Spoon of RZA"
Date: May 8, 2026

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Episode Overview

This episode of The Bonfire takes on a high-energy, irreverent tone as comedians Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly host an in-studio interview with hip hop legend and filmmaker RZA. The show blends riff-heavy behind-the-scenes anecdotes, a thorough discussion of RZA’s new revenge thriller "One Spoon of Chocolate," and laugh-out-loud moments among the Bonfire crew. The hosts tackle everything from film references and uncomfortable race conversations to crowd dynamics at concerts and the age-old comic struggle: who gets recognized on the street.

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Key Segments and Highlights

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1. Setting the Scene: Last-Minute RZA Interview

Timestamps: 01:01 – 04:27

• Hosts' anticipation: Jay and Bobby break from their usual schedule for a last-minute interview with RZA, clearly excited but jokingly nervous he might roast them.
• Premiere stories: Bobby recounts attending the movie premiere with Christine, including a humorous encounter with actor Bokeem Woodbine (02:10).
• Comic banter: The duo jokes about being the only uncool people in a fancy movie crowd, and their relationship with their show’s producer.

Notable Quote:

"What if he turns on us hard? We'll throw Jacob at him. And then we run."
– Bobby (01:21)

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2. RZA Joins: Comedy, Film Style, and 'One Spoon of Chocolate'

Timestamps: 04:27 – 23:04

• RZA brings jokes: RZA lightly riffs on the idea he could be doing stand-up, playfully engaging with the hosts’ comic energy.
• Film discussion: Deep dive into RZA’s new revenge movie. Bobby praises the film's throwback, boundary-pushing vibe, comparing it to '80s and '90s movies (05:17).
• Creating villains: RZA details how he intentionally wrote detestable white supremacist characters. He references Tarantino’s "Django" and builds a “Tarantino universe” with nods like "Karensville" and "red apples" (08:12).
• Representation & emotion: RZA says his goal is to make audiences feel "every emotion"—from discomfort to laughter—citing both "Smokey and the Bandit" and “In the Heat of the Night” as influences.

Notable Quote:

"As a filmmaker, my goal is to hit every emotion, bro... I want you to go to the theater. I want something to happen while you're watching."
– RZA (10:10)

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3. Behind the Scenes: Casting, Method Acting, and Table Reads

Timestamps: 07:04 – 20:40

• Casting surprises: RZA reveals the actors playing vile racists are, in reality, "the nicest people,” including a Brit married to a Black woman.
• Addressing the N-word: With heavy use of racial slurs in the script, RZA organized an HR "N-word pep talk" for cast and crew (18:38).
• On Tarantino: RZA credits Quentin Tarantino as a personal mentor and his film as existing within a "Tarantino multiverse."
• Soundtrack: Talks about collaborating with composer Tyler Bates (John Wick, Guardians of the Galaxy). RZA describes how Bates created the score by "bowing a guitar through pedals" (24:01).

Notable Quote:

"We had to have HR, like, prepare everybody... an N-word pep talk."
– RZA (18:56)

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4. Wu-Tang’s Broad Appeal & White Fans at Hip Hop Shows

Timestamps: 15:13 – 17:57

• Fan anecdotes: Jay recounts awkward moments as a white Wu-Tang fan and the dynamic at Ghostface and Raekwon concerts, noting how Raekwon says "ninja" instead of the N-word in diverse crowds.
• RZA’s take: RZA reminisces about growing up in diverse Staten Island, expressing pride in Wu-Tang's cross-cultural following.

Notable Quote:

"In order to become platinum, you need some white brothers."
– RZA (16:06)

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5. Fan Encounters & The Curse of Recognition

Timestamps: 32:14 – 41:16

• Who's more recognizable?: Jay and Bobby debate street recognition. Bobby ramps up comic outrage when passersby praise Jay and barely acknowledge him, even while wearing "lift shoes" to appear taller.
• Comic insecurity: The running bit centers on comics' egos and the pain of being overlooked in favor of cohosts, demonstrating a classic comic rivalry/friendship.

Notable Quote:

"Today hurt extra bad. And it bugged me too, because...I kept...inching, like, closing. So I'd be like, dude, he's not realizing we're almost eye to eye right now."
– Bobby (35:19)

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6. Skankfest Art Conspiracies & Flaming Bob Dandy

Timestamps: 41:16 – 53:24

• Character art grievances: The crew riffs on the Skankfest promotional art, joking that Bobby is always depicted as "gay or fat," while Jay looks like a hero.
• Running gags: "Flaming Bob Dandy" (an outlandish, campy alter-ego) is born, with plans for Bobby to embody the character at Skankfest.
• Physical comedy: Christine and Jacob join in, with jokes about body image, costumes, and festival representation.

Notable Quote:

"That's a space microphone for your space tits. I always forgot about your giant space flap tits."
– Big Jay (42:01)

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7. Listener Interactions: Dick Pics & Group Chats

Timestamps: 55:03 – 62:38

• Dick pic mayhem: Christine shares she receives unsolicited explicit pics from male listeners. The group riffs on etiquette, body positivity, and what constitutes a flattering or unflattering nude.
• Comic camaraderie: Longstanding Bonfire tradition: sharing the weirdest, wildest listener submissions in the group chat, for better or worse.

Notable Quote:

"If I get dick pics, we all get dick pics."
– Christine (55:37)

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8. Show Wrap-Up: Plugs, Teasers, and Crew Riffs

Timestamps: 62:43 – End

• Upcoming gigs: Bobby and Jay promote their stand-up dates and encourage listeners to see “One Spoon of Chocolate” (53:53, 64:07).
• Skankfest push: Heavy mention of Skankfest New Orleans, tickets on sale.
• Crew shout-outs: Teasers for next week (with guests Colin Quinn and Rich Vos), more behind-the-scenes banter, and recurring encouragement for listeners to share their “body part photos” with the Bonfire crew.

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Memorable Quotes & Moments

• RZA on villains:

  "These characters here in our film, hopefully, there’s not an ounce of these motherfuckers in you...Fuck it, yo." (09:10–09:24)

• On scoring the film:

  "He only plays the guitar with a bow. So all those sounds you hear in that movie, bro, he's bowing the guitar through some foot pedal." — RZA (24:01)

• Comic rivalry:

  "If you know him, you should at least know who I am...Not even from the Bonfire, just from the history of New York comedians." — Bobby (37:15)

• Christine on fan pics:

  "If I get dick pics, we all get dick pics." (55:37)

• Jay on audience diversity:

  "In order to become platinum, you need some white brothers." — RZA (16:06)

• The birth of Flaming Bob Dandy:

  "I'm making it. Flamin Bob Dandy's coming." — Bobby (43:34)

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Topic Map & Timestamps

| Segment | Timestamps | |-------------------------------------- |--------------| | Setting the scene, movie premiere | 01:01–04:27 | | RZA interview, film discussion | 04:27–23:04 | | Casting, Tarantino talk, HR stories | 07:04–23:44 | | Audience, Wu-Tang, crowds, race talk | 15:13–17:57 | | Street recognition bit | 32:14–41:16 | | Skankfest art, Flaming Bob Dandy | 41:16–53:24 | | Listener submissions/dick pic riffing | 55:03–62:38 | | Wrap-up, plugs, crew chatter | 62:43–end |

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Summary Takeaway

"One Spoon of RZA" is a quintessential Bonfire episode: a rapid-fire blend of behind-the-scenes comedy, no-filter cultural discussion, and genuine appreciation for their guests and listeners. The RZA interview is equal parts hilarious, insightful, and affectionate—a love letter to old-school genre filmmaking, artistic risk-taking, and the wild community that surrounds The Bonfire. The second half is pure Bonfire chaos: inside jokes, festival planning, and NSFW fan interaction—reminding listeners why this show remains a staple for comedy insiders and fans alike.

Transcript

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[Big Jay]

And now the bonfire with Big J.

[Announcer]

Okerson and Robert Kelly.

[Bobby Kelly]

We got this last minute interview. Yeah, we came in early. We got a last minute RZA interview that we're going to interrupt the Lost tapes with. But, ooh, yeah, we're excited.

[Big Jay]

We're really excited now, before it's happened. Let's see how it goes.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. So enjoy.

[Big Jay]

What if he turns on us hard?

[Bobby Kelly]

We'll run. We'll throw Jacob at him. And then we run.

[Big Jay]

Jacob. You deal with him. This is a very exciting interview for me.

[Bobby Kelly]

It is.

[Big Jay]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

And we saw. I saw his movie last night, went to the premiere and. Very funny. We were. We went into the theater early. Theater 5. It's a bunch of little theaters.

[Big Jay]

You and Christine.

[Bobby Kelly]

Me and Christine. My. My date last night. We're a great couple, by the way.

[Big Jay]

Power couple.

[Bobby Kelly]

Power couple. We walked right in like nobody stopped us. And we're sitting in there. We grabbed the seats in the back. Small theater, Theater five. And then Bo.

[Big Jay]

Keem Woodbine.

[Bobby Kelly]

Woodbine walks in with his friends, looks at us and goes, oh, we're in the wrong theater.

[Big Jay]

Really?

[Bobby Kelly]

And then she goes. She goes with theater. You in theater five? She goes, no, this is the right one. He was like, oops, sorry.

[Big Jay]

Christine said that?

[Bobby Kelly]

No, the lady.

[Big Jay]

Oh. I was gonna say, Christine has no idea who Bokeem Woodbine is.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, she has no idea. But I did. As soon as I saw him, I was like, what's up, man? I'm a big fan. But he. He looked at two corny white people, was like, yeah, man, I'm famous. I'm supposed to be with other famous people. We're in the Nobody theater.

[Big Jay]

Bokeem Woodbine Played his stepfather in the Wu Tang Clan TV show.

[Bobby Kelly]

He also was awesome in Fargo.

[Big Jay]

Pokemon was good in Fargo.

[Bobby Kelly]

This movie was. Was awesome.

[Big Jay]

Yeah. Revenge flick.

[Bobby Kelly]

Revenge flick. It was fantastic.

[RZA]

He's still down the hall.

[Big Jay]

I just don't want to interrupt. Interrupt a free tape.

[Bobby Kelly]

Nah, you can. You can interrupt anytime you want. We love you, dude brain. What do you need, dude?

[Big Jay]

Ready in about, like, 5ish minutes.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, we're ready, buddy. Yeah, the movie.

[Big Jay]

That's Liam, our conduit to the rza.

[Bobby Kelly]

He's our conduit to all of the famous people.

[Big Jay]

To all of the famous people. But right now, the RZA.

[Bobby Kelly]

One more note.

[Big Jay]

So you guys have 20 minutes. Is that okay? Yeah. Okay, cool. Thank you so much.

[Bobby Kelly]

Thank you, buddy.

[Big Jay]

That guy, I was going to let him know how much traffic I sat in, but, I mean, we did come here.

[Bobby Kelly]

Our show's at 5.

[Big Jay]

We're here at.

[Bobby Kelly]

We're here. 11.

[Big Jay]

You were here at 11? Yeah, I was at 11ish. I was in the tunnel.

[Bobby Kelly]

I love a good ish.

[Big Jay]

Yeah, at 11ish. I was in the tunnel till about 11:30.

[Bobby Kelly]

Well, you're here now. And we got the. The Riz coming in. Can I call him the Riz?

[Big Jay]

I wouldn't.

[Bobby Kelly]

Well, during the movie, Bo Keem was. Him and his pals were. You know, they were talking.

[Big Jay]

Yeah. It was black people movie theater.

[Bobby Kelly]

And I was like, christine, I should jump in. She's like, don't.

[Big Jay]

You should.

[Bobby Kelly]

I was like, come on. I got stuff, too.

[Big Jay]

You should go. Hey, did you guys know there's elevators in federal penitentiaries? Yeah. Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

This movie, though, was a little difficult as a white dude.

[Big Jay]

It's white supremacists.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's. It's. It's. It's white supremacists, but to the 35th power.

[Big Jay]

Yeah. They're very violent to black people.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's. It's Uncle. He. He made it so. He made him so bad that you could. As.

[Big Jay]

You know, I'm gonna tell Riz that you thought it was a tragedy because all the black people got. All the white people got hurt.

[Bobby Kelly]

I actually watched it in reverse. You want to throw to the interview? Yeah, let's go to the interview. Here he comes right now.

[Big Jay]

Everybody there is a.

[Bobby Kelly]

Hey, what's up, man? How you doing?

[RZA]

Let me go and give you some love. What up, brother?

[Big Jay]

Nice to meet you, man.

[Bobby Kelly]

How you doing?

[Christine]

Thank you.

[Big Jay]

So.

[RZA]

So you tell me that I'm doing. This is comedy now.

[Bobby Kelly]

Comedy.

[RZA]

I could run. I could run one of my jokes now.

[Bobby Kelly]

Please, please.

[Christine]

No, no, no.

[RZA]

All my jokes, I still.

[Bobby Kelly]

So, yeah.

[RZA]

If you got one, say it now. I'll say it after you.

[Bobby Kelly]

Okay, okay, okay. They

[Big Jay]

talk about your little white penis. Bobby, I have a small penis.

[RZA]

I won't be able to sell it out.

[Bobby Kelly]

This is my first joke I ever did. You ready? My grandmother was born with two thumbs and one hand. She made a great pie crust. Oh, crate for the act out. You got to wait for the act.

[RZA]

You got to act it out.

[Bobby Kelly]

He didn't get it until I did the act out. Then he got it.

[Big Jay]

Apologies, apologies.

[Bobby Kelly]

How you doing, man? I, I. We saw the movie last night. I got to say, man, you created your own style. I've seen some mixtures of people's style in it, but it's your own thing. I was so. I mean, dude, there was so much stuff in that movie, and you did it, right? You went for it. You didn't hold back. It was like watching a movie back in the 80s and 90s, right. The way, the way they used to make movies. They weren't. You weren't trying to please anybody but yourself. A little uncomfortable for being a white guy, right, in the movies.

[RZA]

Well, I was trying to please the audience in the sense of have fun.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[RZA]

Feel uncomfortable.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[RZA]

Get mad, get glad.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[RZA]

You know what I mean? This. I said I was gonna say a joke, but I'm not gonna say a joke. But do you remember the scene when the sheriff is talking to his son about this personal shit you got going on? Jimmy is bad for business. And then the son says, what do you mean, bad for business? We made a half a mil last week. And his father leans over and says, you know, boy, you get your strength and good looks from my side of the family, but you get your brains from your mama's side of the family, buddy.

[Bobby Kelly]

It was so funny. Let me tell you why, dude. One of my favorite movies is Smokey and the Bandit. It was such Buford T. Justice.

[RZA]

That's my man.

[Bobby Kelly]

I heard, junior, when I get home, I'm gonna smack your mama in the mouth. Daddy, my hat fell off. I hope your goddamn head was in it, buddy. When he said that line, I was like, he created. This is a modern day beauty justice. He was so good, man.

[RZA]

Good shout out to Michael Herney, the actor who's a Michael Herney, actually was a civil. Is a fighter for civil. Civil rights. So most of these actors I know, in a movie, you would never.

[Bobby Kelly]

Buddy. Oh, my Lord. I mean, he was scary, dude.

[RZA]

Yeah, yeah. He was in this movie a lot of the actors, I just want to say. Cause you've seen it. There was really a master class of casting and acting.

[Big Jay]

Yeah.

[RZA]

The guy that plays Jimmy, who was our lead villain, is married to a black woman with two children. And he's from London. He's a Brit.

[Big Jay]

I bet that was awkward dinners after shooting.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. Hoping there's not method.

[Big Jay]

I gotta take this character home with me. It's gonna be a rough dinner.

[Bobby Kelly]

Why are you in my house?

[RZA]

Yeah, right. I seen him, was totally shaving.

[Bobby Kelly]

Right.

[RZA]

He shaved everything. He walked. We didn't recognize him. He came in looking like. Like he could be a Brad Pitt guy.

[Bobby Kelly]

He had to.

[RZA]

Yeah. Yeah, there he goes.

[Big Jay]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

If he was in New York, he'd get the. Kicked out of in Times Square. Is that guy.

[RZA]

Yeah, that's him.

[Bobby Kelly]

He was. He was so. Dude, the. The reason why, you know, like, you make these movies about race, you know, look, I'm a white guy, right? I get it. You know, it's going to be uncomfortable. But you went so, so over the top with these guys that everybody should hate. These guys everybody hates. And I love that you named the town Karensville. There's these little, little things you put in Karensville. It was hilarious. And then you gave a little homage to Quentin with the red apples, of course.

[Big Jay]

Well.

[RZA]

Well, this whole movie takes place in the Tarantino's universe. You see, when. When the guy. So that's. That's. You know, when you watch Django, just talk. Let's go backwards a beat.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[RZA]

Nobody, no black man wanted to be Sam Jackson.

[Bobby Kelly]

Right?

[RZA]

Okay. That character was the epitome. Even Minister Farrakhan said if that character, if you see that character, you'd be like, you don't want one ounce of that character in you.

[Bobby Kelly]

Right? Yeah.

[RZA]

So these characters here in our film don't. Hopefully there's not an ounce of these motherfuckers in you. I could curse here. Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

You can say fuck it. Yeah. Everything.

[RZA]

Fuck it, yo.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, you can say whatever you want.

[RZA]

All right. Fuck it. Fuck it, fuck it, fuck it, yo.

[Big Jay]

Fuck it.

[RZA]

Yo, what's up? Yo, Amazon.

[Big Jay]

Fuck it, fuck it, fuck it.

[Bobby Kelly]

Other white guy. What's up? Fuck it.

[Big Jay]

Hey, what up, Taylor?

[Bobby Kelly]

What's up, Taylor? Jay, stand up. He grew up in Philly and he came up in the black rooms. And one of his little catchphrases was it.

[RZA]

That's it.

[Bobby Kelly]

I swear to God.

[RZA]

That got you uneasy too.

[Big Jay]

That was me just trying to get through.

[RZA]

He's cool.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. He the. The opening scene, though. I didn't Know what to expect. I didn't understand. I didn't. I didn't know what type of movie it was going to be. But the opening scene when the kid was coming down and the playing the basket. I love that you had the actual dribble and the.

[RZA]

The sounds and stuff.

[Bobby Kelly]

The sounds in there. And then I was like, oh, this is great. And then what? Ha. It just. Out of the gate, it went wrong. Like, it was like, what the fuck is happening?

[RZA]

Well, as a filmmaker, my goal is to hit every emotion, bro. It's like, I want you to go to the theater. I want something to happen while you're watching. I want you to look over, maybe like, oh, you see that too? Of course everybody sees it, but how is everybody reacting to it? And what's the energy of it? And of course, you know, being from the Tarantino world, I hate to say that, but that's the facts. That's what I learned from. Right. You're going to have a spoonful of different genres in here. You nailed it with the Buford Sheriff.

[Bobby Kelly]

Right.

[RZA]

And we could have went to. I mean, there was a point when the parents came into the jail and they was like, where's my daughter? He said, hold on now, hold on. I love his voice. So that's why I keep.

[Bobby Kelly]

He's so good, man.

[RZA]

This guy's good.

[Bobby Kelly]

He created somebody you want to see again. Yeah.

[RZA]

But that particular scene, he reminded me of Heat of the Night. Rod Steiger.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[RZA]

You know what I mean?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[RZA]

And, and, and, and, and so. And yet there's a scene when we get the. The Bell's bondsman.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, my. That. It doesn't. You did create a. Like a multiverse. I'm like, this does. This world doesn't exist.

[RZA]

Where the hell does this guy come from?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, the truck and the.

[RZA]

The.

[Bobby Kelly]

This is what I love, too, dude.

[RZA]

Not to.

[Bobby Kelly]

Not to be a pervert, but you had some nice TNA in there. You. I mean, you should. You know what I'm saying? This had horror genre in it, too. It struck me that door of the deli was frightening to me.

[RZA]

Right.

[Bobby Kelly]

When you. Every time you showed that gas station door, it was you from that first scene. That door was terrifying to me.

[Big Jay]

Yeah.

[RZA]

Respect.

[Bobby Kelly]

It had, like this horror vibe to it. When you went to that guy, the bail bar, it was like this. It had this horror thing. And then with the. I don't know, what is it? Party orgy at a vfw. I don't know, but Jesus, I missed out on that white Guy part. Where was that?

[Big Jay]

I thought it was interesting. When you relocate to Ohio, I'm such a Wu Tang Clan aficionado that I was like, oh, that's from. You moved to Ohio when you were younger for a while.

[RZA]

Yeah.

[Big Jay]

Yeah. And also bumping into Bokim Woodbine in the theater. I was like, you fight your stepfather in the Wu Tang saga?

[Bobby Kelly]

We were in the theater, and it's boutique theater.

[RZA]

Oh, you guys. You guys went last night?

[Bobby Kelly]

I went last night.

[RZA]

Ah.

[Bobby Kelly]

So I was gonna wear my shirt, but Jay wouldn't let me goes, dude, don't be a nerd.

[RZA]

You should have took a fucking. You should have got a shot in mezcal, bro.

[Bobby Kelly]

I don't. I was sober, so I can't, but I will.

[Big Jay]

You don't. You don't drink?

[Bobby Kelly]

No, I don't, but I will if you want me to. If you put me in Wu Tang.

[Big Jay]

If you say so, yes.

[Bobby Kelly]

Beatbox. Yeah. Come on.

[RZA]

In the building. In the building. We in the building.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[RZA]

We in the building. In the building.

[Big Jay]

Well, that was a dream come true.

[Bobby Kelly]

I gotta go. I'm leaving. I'm quitting everything.

[Big Jay]

It's funny. I want to ask you about that.

[Bobby Kelly]

Hang on. I need to take a breath.

[Big Jay]

Go ahead, go ahead, because I have a good qu. I was going to say something made me laugh. Years ago, you and I were both at the same Comic Con, San Diego, and we're both flying back to New York on the same flight. We were only a couple seats away from each other. And I am so bad with that that I go. I planned my entire flight. What am I gonna say when we get off this plane? I'm not gonna bother you on the plane. When we get off the plane. How do I give my. How do I give my little lay down now? I've failed at this before. This happened with Fat Joe to me. And when I got off the plane, he walked off the plane too. And I go. And my plan was to go. I've been a fan since Flo Jo came on the box.

[RZA]

Oh, I'm like, that's gonna get him. That's a good one.

[Big Jay]

He came off. I waited. I go. I go, hey, man, I don't want to bug you too long. I just want to tell you, I'm a huge fan. I've been a fan since Flo Joe came on the box. And he just looked at me kind of, like, shitty, and then took an AirPod out and goes, what's that? And I went, fan. And I just left. So when we get off the plane. I think you were off performance. You were kind of gone. And then I think you were waiting for your family at baggage claim.

[RZA]

Okay.

[Big Jay]

And then I was like, now's my time. And then I saw like a mirrored view of what was about to happen with a short, kind of bald headed, chubby, like white dude.

[Bobby Kelly]

You just described me.

[Big Jay]

Yeah, yeah, but this guy was just, pants were tucked in and he was like balding on top. And him just coming over to you and just laying all of the, like, man, Wu Tang got me through this and got me through that. And I'm watching it going like, that's. He didn't do it for you. I'm like, this is not what his dream was when he made the Wu Tang class. That one day a little short fat guy would be like, hey, man, music really speaks to me. Does it? So my question almost, that is like, it's reached so many people and it's, you know, I thought it was interesting. We went to go see Ghostface and raekwon at Terminal 5 a while ago. And I think it's interesting that looking at the crowd and seeing so many white faces. Raekwon chooses to say ninja. He says ninja and everything because I think he doesn't want it to come back, like, see the crowd coming back with it. Ghostface doesn't give a shit.

[Bobby Kelly]

What's the word?

[Big Jay]

He's not saying ninja. Ninjutsu.

[Bobby Kelly]

What's the word? Oh, ninjitsu.

[Big Jay]

Okay,

[RZA]

well, in our movie. Hold on, look, that word is. Let's talk about, talk about the word for a minute. But as far as Wu Tang being so, you know, accepted by so many different people, I think when you look at these nine guys, you got a whole community. Staten island, you got our Italian brothers there, our Jewish brothers there. We in school. I'm in school with Castellano's grandson, bro.

[Big Jay]

Oh, really?

[RZA]

I'm serious. You know what I mean? So you feel all that in the music? The Woo Gambinos, like we, we, we, we, we chose that to represent our, our island. And I think that New Yorkers, white, black, green, yellow, all felt that. That's why it did that. And of course, if you, in order to become platinum, you need some white brothers. All right.

[Big Jay]

You're not going to get was. We laughed. We laughed so hard. We went to go see you guys with Run the Jewels.

[Bobby Kelly]

Uh huh.

[Big Jay]

And that's the shirt I should have worn. Yeah. At Run the Jewels.

[RZA]

That was a nice one. You guys made it to that one.

[Big Jay]

Oh yeah, yeah. Yeah, we.

[Bobby Kelly]

That was my first time seeing you. And he. He was like. He actually was like, you're coming. Make sure.

[RZA]

Ah, nice.

[Big Jay]

I got a chance to see. I saw you guys that first rock of the Bells with Rage back at. Well, this was in Phil. This was outside of Philly. Pnc. Not a pnc. Camden Waterfront.

[RZA]

Camden, yeah, Camden.

[Big Jay]

It was Camden Waterfront at the time and Old Dirty. It was such a great thing. And then talk about what a fan I was. And also stupid in this regard because you guys went on first and I was there. I remember I was so excited to see you guys. It was great. And then when we were in between bands, I was just. I think Rage only at that point had the one album out and that song didn't hit me right away. So I remember looking at my girl, Famous Last Words. I went, hey, you want to get out of here? And beat traffic. And then we left. And I never saw Rage against the Machine till two years ago again. Oh, man, the guy couldn't even walk anymore.

[RZA]

Which is a. Yeah. Which is a. Seeing Rage is rare. Zach and Tom shout out. Tom is a brother. Me and Tom, actually, at the Christmas he did. Tom does these Christmas parties in la. So this Christmas he does the party. He's like, you know, Bobby, you're gonna be in town. I'm doing the Christmas thing for the charity. And I would say, yeah. And he gets on. He gets me on stage. And it's me, Chuck D, Stevie Van Zandt, right. Tom Morello and Arza. And we do Wu Tang Clan Ain't Nothing to Fuck With.

[Big Jay]

Oh, yeah, yeah. I saw a video of this, I think.

[RZA]

Yeah, yeah, that's real shit. Yo. So. But going back to the word, right, in the film, you know, there's a lot of vulgar use of the word, right?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[RZA]

But I think, you know one actor, Mr. James Thompson, who does a great job and also a very nice guy. I gotta tell you, these actors were acting, you know, when James came to the set. Because James is actually probably the most aggressive guy. He's the one at the end that they pull off and they like. He still want to say the word one more time before he goes and shit.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But he was. He was a mean looking. He's.

[Big Jay]

Yo.

[RZA]

He made. He's a mean looking guy. Nicest guy in the fucking world.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. He does not. His face does not look nice. He looks like he was born racist. You know what I mean? I'm from Boston. No, no, I grew up with those. That. That little pug nose.

[Big Jay]

Yeah.

[RZA]

Yo, bro. And when. You know what? When we. So when I do. And I do my movies, I have to get. I bring the whole cast together. I bring the whole crew together, too. But the N word was so much in this movie that we had to have hr, like, prepare everybody.

[Bobby Kelly]

You had to have an N word pep talk.

[RZA]

Yeah, straight up, bro.

[Big Jay]

Yeah.

[RZA]

But the guy who had the most lines haven't. You know, he auditioned. I get on the roll. Now I gotta meet him. And I said, well, let's have a cast dinner so everybody can meet each other. He comes. He's the nicest guy. He sits beside the producer's wife. The producer is Paul hall, who did Higher Learning and Shaft. His wife was like a news reporter in her day. Beautiful Black woman, maybe mid-60s. James sits beside her for the dinner. And, you know, so I'm not paying attention after the dentist, he's like, that guy James is the nicest guy I ever met. Because all I know is from the look, I haven't had a chance to really get with him yet. And I was like, james,

[Bobby Kelly]

he is

[RZA]

the nicest guy that I ever met. And he is a good guy. We started playing poker games every weekend. So on the weekends, it'd be Don Cheadle, Abazar, rza. My man John Lugo from Staten island would fly in and shit. And half the cast, the grips and all these guys all play poker. And this fucking guy James comes and sweeps the fucking table.

[Bobby Kelly]

Shit, right?

[RZA]

And I said, he's winning because they're scared of him. He looks scary.

[Bobby Kelly]

He looks scary, man. The characters you choose, everybody was a character. It wasn't like a movie you see like this, and it's just one or two. And everybody had their thing, their little. Created this own little universe of themselves. The movies. The movie's amazing. And you. It's almost like I feel we're losing Tarantino, but I feel.

[RZA]

Got me.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, we got. I'm serious.

[RZA]

You guys got the rza.

[Bobby Kelly]

I mean, I'm not saying that because you're right here and you are the rza.

[Big Jay]

It's a lot of it, though.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's a lot of it. No, I'm serious.

[Big Jay]

Well, I wanted to ask how much does your. Because, like, when you're making a movie, how much does your musical mind, like, play into that? Because I always thought. I mean, I know you didn't direct Ghost Dog, but I've always said, like, you might as well have, because it's. The movie is the tone of your music. Well, the whole, like, movie, like, kind of Moves to, like, the tone of your music. I feel like I respect that.

[RZA]

But that's Jim. Jim. Jim was one of the first guys to get me into Hollywood and get me even thinking about film as well. John Woo was the one that took me to a lot of lunches and gave me the, you know, just the wisdom of watch movies and do this. But Tarantino became my professor. He's the godfather for me, and I studied with him for six years before I finally understood to say that. But as far as music, Music, sometimes, like a man with the Iron fist, the music was there along with the script for this movie. Maybe one or two songs.

[Jacob]

Really?

[RZA]

Yeah. Like. Like the opening credit sequence, which is a very awkward Beatles sounding song.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, right.

[RZA]

I played that on set. I knew that that was gonna open my movie. And then there was the Marvin Gaye song, that Happens.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, yeah. It was a good scene.

[RZA]

I knew that I wanted it. I didn't think I was gonna get it, but I got lucky on that. And the estate, they appreciated me and they gave me the rights. But then the score. I didn't know how to score this film, bro. I gotta be honest. Nah, I was too close to it. And so Mark Abraham, who was a producer of my first film, I had him come take a look and I said, I need your help, Mark. I. Like, I don't know, you know. You know. He said, I know somebody that can help this. He said, I got a buddy. And it was Tyler Bates. Now, Tyler Bates, of course, did all the John Wick films. He does Guardian of the Galaxy, and he's also a producer of Marilyn Manson.

[Big Jay]

Yeah, I was gonna say he works with Marilyn Manson. I'm a huge Manson fan, too, so.

[RZA]

Yeah, so. So. So he watches the film and he says this. What we. What we all just said what you just said? He said. He said. He said I couldn't afford him. Let's be straight, okay? He said, I'll do it because I want people to see this film. He said, I think it's an incredible piece of art. He said, but also, I want people to watch it and make sure that they're not on that screen.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, yeah.

[RZA]

I said, okay, I get that. And he. So he started doing it, and he was writing great music. And then maybe in the middle, the music supervisor, Gilly, he was like, hey, Bobby, I'll keep doing people's voices.

[Bobby Kelly]

I like it.

[Big Jay]

Okay, cool.

[RZA]

He's like, hey, Bobby, you know, why don't you and Tyler collaborate on some of this stuff? Like you're sitting here you're sitting. Cause you're taking pictures of us in the studio.

[Bobby Kelly]

He's a white guy, right?

[RZA]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

Okay. Yeah, the voice is good.

[Big Jay]

Thanks.

[RZA]

He said, why don't you guys collaborate on this? And I was like, I don't know what you think, you know, Tyler. Tyler's like, yeah, let's do it together. And so we ended up doing it together.

[Big Jay]

That's probably a kick for him to work with you too. Yeah, it's like, out of network sort of for him.

[RZA]

Yeah. I don't know. But. But for me, to be honest, he's amazing.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yo.

[RZA]

The dude got a guitar with all these pedals, but he only plays the guitar with a bow.

[Big Jay]

Oh, really?

[RZA]

So all those sounds you hear in that movie, bro. He's bowing the guitar through some foot pedal, bro.

[Big Jay]

That's wild. Let me just let you go. Is there two things I could say real quick that I thought was funny? I forgot very recently that I. I auditioned for Wu Tang American Saga, and I went in to read for a part, and they were like, no, but would you mind reading for this one? And it was a scene of a white guy saying the N word. And when you're buying your first BBC. Oh, that's sick. And then I was like, yeah. And it's like two white girls doing the auditions. They go, yeah, yeah. I go, all right. I go, you think I'm gonna get this part? And they're like, why go? Because now you're just gonna have a video of me saying this if I don't get it? I didn't get it. I'm like, oh, great. Well, that's there now for the rest of it. And then the other thing is, do I owe you money? Because every time I walk on stage, every weekend, I come out to can't stop me now. Is that okay?

[RZA]

That's super.

[Big Jay]

Okay.

[Bobby Kelly]

All right. Make sure you check it out. Thanks for coming in, man. The movie is fantastic. It is from the second it opens. It's coming out tomorrow. One Spoon of Chocolate. Release exclusively in theaters tomorrow. Go check it out. It's awesome. If you like Quentin Tarantino, John Woo, all those guys, you're gonna love this movie. So thanks for coming in, man.

[Big Jay]

Thank you for being here.

[RZA]

Peace.

[Christine]

Thank you.

[Big Jay]

I think you should have wore your elevator shoe.

[RZA]

I'm loving the humor. I could spend all day in this.

[Big Jay]

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[Bobby Kelly]

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[Bobby Kelly]

Sorry about that. Oh, I left $100 worth of. $150 worth of cigar at the newsstand or at Starbucks. Yeah, it's, it's, it's hard. It's because I'm not used to being at where I'm at right now elevation wise.

[Big Jay]

Well, I gotta tell you, I want to give everybody a little peek behind the curtain on today. It's of course it's Tuesday. It's Thursday. For you listening, it's our pre record. And me and Bobby arrived at the, at the parking lot at the same exact time.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big Jay]

And then we waited for Christine, pulled up shortly after and we all started walking over. And once or twice on the walk, a guy noticed me and said, you know, big fan or whatever.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, no, no, no. It's more than that. It's way more than, hey man, big fan. I'm fine with that. It's. Dude, you're the man now.

[Big Jay]

You that you're jumping ahead. You're jumping ahead, Bobby. You're jumping ahead.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'm burying the lead. Go.

[Big Jay]

No, it's not. You're burying the lead.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'm gilding the lead.

[Big Jay]

I Feel like you heard that first, buddy. That's not what happened first. The guy said, dude, really big fan. I said, thank you very much. And then Bobby turned around, as you often do, and starts accosting this person. Yeah. Motherfucking him. And. And what about me, motherfucker? And then the guy goes, he goes, I've seen you.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, no, you're missing a key fact.

[Big Jay]

I'm sorry.

[Bobby Kelly]

Key fact. I do give them. I look at them eye to eye and I give them the opportunity. I don't just accost people, Jay. That's not who I am. I give you the opportunity. I'll make a couple faces, maybe raise the eyebrow up. And I look at you and I give you an opportunity to go, oh, shit.

[Big Jay]

No, you hey, hey. Them first. Because we're in transit. We're walking past each other. We were at this point 10 yards away from this guy, and you're cursing at him down the street. He then says, he's like, oh, no. He goes, I've seen you, man. He goes, you're so funny. He goes, I know your bits. He goes, I've seen you at least 10 times. And Bobby goes, and I've killed it every time. And he goes, absolutely. And then he goes, so what the fuck? And he goes, but he's the man. And then Bobby went into full motherfucker mode.

[Bobby Kelly]

I went into sixth gear.

[Big Jay]

He went into sixth gear in the sixth gear. We had to turn him around and walk him back. And then about three more times, Bobby kept just accusing other people on the street of recognizing me when they didn't even do anything. He goes, that guy fucking knows you, you fucking cop. And he's angry. And I now, now I'm like, why is this making Bobby so irate? Is making him particularly. Yeah, I rate today.

[Bobby Kelly]

Today. Yeah.

[Big Jay]

And I know why now.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yep.

[Big Jay]

Because I didn't see it. Because I see Bobby as a. As a ten foot tall giant. The guy dominates a room.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big Jay]

He's the biggest personality. I know what's up. But he is wearing today his lift shoes.

[Bobby Kelly]

That's right.

[Big Jay]

That have added three full inches to his height.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big Jay]

Three full inches to his height. And the fact that he wasn't noticed today hits extra hard because I think Bobby thought maybe the problem was, is people were staring right over his head not recognizing him. Now that he's eyes to chin with them, he doesn't understand why they don't know who he is.

[Bobby Kelly]

Today hurt extra bad. And it bugged me too, because I was standing next to you and I kept Getting inching, like, closing. So I'd be like, dude, he's not realizing we're almost eye to eye right now.

[Big Jay]

He doesn't even realize that you're eye.

[Bobby Kelly]

And I stood next to Christine, too, and she was looking up at me. Didn't realize it.

[Big Jay]

I just thought you were physically dominating me.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, I was.

[Big Jay]

That's how I took it. I was like, today. I don't know if you notice, I gave Paul. I gave you Paul as a sign that I trust you. You are the leader.

[Bobby Kelly]

It really. That motherfucker, though. He came out well, Bobby, you go

[Big Jay]

at them so hard, they go immediately defensive. Versus going like, you don't give him a chance. Here's what you don't give a chance to. You don't give him a chance.

[Bobby Kelly]

I do give him a second. I look at him. I get you.

[Big Jay]

If you go back, looking's not fair. We're in transit, and I am a spectacle.

[Bobby Kelly]

You are a spectacle. I need to be a spectacle. I need to dress like. What's that guy's name? He said Dandy. Bobby.

[Big Jay]

What was his name? Oh, Flamin Bob Dandy. If you were flaming Bob Dandy all day long, buddy, you would dominate the streets.

[Bobby Kelly]

I could sell photos.

[Big Jay]

Absolutely.

[Bobby Kelly]

I would sell photos to families.

[Big Jay]

People are gonna go, holy shit. Oh, my God, it's Times Square. Flaming Bob Dandy. It's Times Square zone.

[Bobby Kelly]

I need to add zing. Some flare. I need something.

[Big Jay]

I told you, I got red boots on today. I got the thing flying out of my pocket. Always. I got the wallet chain. I got jingle jangles. I got earrings.

[Bobby Kelly]

Don't forget the skyrocketing career.

[Big Jay]

I'm tall.

[Bobby Kelly]

Don't forget, don't forget. Don't forget the skyrocketing career.

[Big Jay]

Skyrocketing.

[Bobby Kelly]

Come on, dude.

[Big Jay]

Because two people said hi to me on the street.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's not even the way they said hi, though, if there was. Hey, big fan. I'm fine with that. I get big fan, Big fan. Me and you do this all the time. Anytime we do an event together, we count how many big fans we get, and we, you know, it's. I'm fine with that. Right? And. But the last couple days, it's been, dude, you're the fucking king. You're the. Like, they're given an extra thing, and I'm looking right at him. It's like, if you know comedy, if you know him, you should at least know who I am. Not even from the bonfire, just from the history of New York comedians.

[Big Jay]

There is no big J with that

[Bobby Kelly]

Bobby Kelly and this guy, for him to go, dude, senior Tet. 10. 10 times. 10 times.

[Big Jay]

For the first time, for the first time ever, those words hit Bobby right in the chest. Because this guy was a shorter gentleman himself.

[Bobby Kelly]

And I'm sitting here in high heel sneakers and it's bugging me because my feet are hurting.

[Big Jay]

You're wearing heels? Trying to impress the world.

[Bobby Kelly]

I thought today was gonna be the day.

[Big Jay]

Dude, Flamin Bob dandy though, is gonna change things.

[Jacob]

He looks like a.

[Big Jay]

Where were they cigarettes thing.

[Bobby Kelly]

Nice. I'm glad I did that before.

[Big Jay]

Oh, you're gonna dominate. I think I probably charged you for them.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, those guys love me. He gave me free stuff yesterday.

[Big Jay]

What?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, the dude. I hit it off with Muslims, man.

[Big Jay]

That's what I mean. They love big personality.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. You see you. I'm a big personality with the blue collar everyday man. You're a big personality with these jerk off.

[Big Jay]

No, these jerk off ties. Those are Sodor fans.

[Bobby Kelly]

That's. Yeah. The jobs.

[Big Jay]

We were telling Bobby outside. Me and Christine were saying to Bobby outside that, remember we would go out, we would do smoke break and we would have to count how many times people stopped and just call Dan Mafee. Yeah, Mafee.

[Jacob]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

The people he hates the most.

[Big Jay]

He hated them.

[Jacob]

Loathed them.

[Bobby Kelly]

Of course he did. And he's one of them. You played one on TV. McPhee.

[Big Jay]

Oh, my God. A guy breaking stride in a three piece suit to come dap up Dan was the funniest thing in the world. And Dan's wearing a dusty Rhodes shirt. He's wearing a dusty road shirt, mom jeans. And some guy in a fucking three piece suit and a fucking monocle running over to tell him how much he loves them.

[Bobby Kelly]

Some douchebag that wants to talk about Ripple and xrp. Guys like what has no idea.

[Big Jay]

Yeah, explain. A short squeeze in the financial game again.

[Jacob]

The more I look at this picture of you, Bob, last year's skank fest. You're an obese. Pennywise, before he turns.

[Big Jay]

There's nothing obese about this picture.

[Jacob]

It's gigantic.

[Christine]

No, it's the outfit.

[Jacob]

It's the outfit, sure, but it doesn't flatter him.

[RZA]

No.

[Big Jay]

What are you talking about? It's the puffy arms.

[Bobby Kelly]

Jay, Jay, Jay.

[Jacob]

The outfit.

[Bobby Kelly]

Short king is missing.

[Big Jay]

He's taking a shot.

[Bobby Kelly]

He's taking a shot because he had the shot.

[Jacob]

I don't think you are. I'm saying that's the way they drew you.

[Bobby Kelly]

Hey, Jacob. It's all right, man. I Understand that I'm no longer part of your little gang anymore and you're bummed out. I understand it. Dude.

[Big Jay]

Christine, do me a favor for Jacob's sake.

[Jacob]

Is that flat out at all.

[Big Jay]

Go on either side of Bobby's of the body down there with your fingers on the screen here. It's not fat at all. No, no. Of his size. The red.

[Bobby Kelly]

The red.

[Big Jay]

Where's the red underneath the end of November.

[Jacob]

I don't know what you call the Pennywise collar.

[Bobby Kelly]

You call me obese. That is like saying the N word to a fat guy.

[Big Jay]

But you're fine.

[Jacob]

I didn't draw it.

[Big Jay]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

Why don't you type that down?

[Big Jay]

No, but you're implying that they made Bobby obese. Because that's the funny thing is to make him obese.

[Jacob]

But I'm showing the costume so wide.

[Big Jay]

Look, look. No, no. The red and the blue right there are his sides. They didn't make him fucking heavy at all.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'm not heavy at all.

[Big Jay]

What you're seeing is the arms.

[Bobby Kelly]

He's lashing out.

[RZA]

He's lashing out.

[Jacob]

Okay. But the let covering everything you want me to see.

[Bobby Kelly]

You're lashing out. You made an assumption because you're hurt because you're the smallest guy in the room.

[Jacob]

Why would you didn't grow Bobby. You bought a lie.

[Bobby Kelly]

What are you talking about?

[Jacob]

You're wearing your lies on your feet.

[Bobby Kelly]

A lot of you want.

[Jacob]

Yes, that's right. You would have the lie like you will. I don't embrace the lie like you do.

[Bobby Kelly]

I feel fantastic. How tall I am.

[Jacob]

I wasn't gonna get them. I had no intention. Now I kind of want them.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, you want them. Dude. They feel good.

[Big Jay]

I'm actually. I've actually shrunk a little bit. I'm six two now. But I'm six four with fame.

[Bobby Kelly]

God damn it.

[Big Jay]

But my street fame puts me at about 6 4.

[Jacob]

That's what happens when you're the man.

[Big Jay]

The cost of being the man.

[Bobby Kelly]

What did the guy say yesterday?

[Big Jay]

I don't like how Jacob attacked you for being this is this couldn't. You couldn't be less obese here.

[Bobby Kelly]

No.

[Big Jay]

Are you.

[Jacob]

I don't know how you're accusing me of. Of making a knock where I cannot see his waist from.

[Big Jay]

But why are you assuming that's a

[Jacob]

fat robot on that one?

[Big Jay]

That's a big fat robot.

[Bobby Kelly]

All right, we agree on this one. Fat robot is obese.

[Big Jay]

But you're trying to attack Flaming Bob Dandy. And Flaming Bob Dandy is not fat.

[Bobby Kelly]

Flaming Bomb Danny is awesome. Fat robot. Do you know much more expensive fat robot would be to build?

[Big Jay]

Yes.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. It doesn't make sense that they made

[Big Jay]

a fat robot with the cost of tin.

[Bobby Kelly]

And they gave me a microphone from the 30s.

[Big Jay]

Yeah, well, it's space also. That's a space microphone for your space tits. I always forgot about your giant space flap tits.

[Bobby Kelly]

I didn't even notice my space flap tits.

[Big Jay]

They gave you flap tits and pepperoni nips. What the.

[Jacob]

There's an actively trying to make him.

[Bobby Kelly]

There is a conspiracy.

[Big Jay]

That is an obese robot for sure.

[Bobby Kelly]

Obese robot.

[Big Jay]

Flaming Bob Dandy was removed from history

[Bobby Kelly]

and they made me into Miami Vice Gay.

[Big Jay]

You like it, though? You like the picture it was.

[Bobby Kelly]

Look at.

[Big Jay]

I think if we would have had a chance to see Flamin Bob Dandy, I think at first you would have been like, what the. I think we could. I think we could have convinced you in the Flaming Bob Dandy.

[Bobby Kelly]

First of all. No, you wouldn't. I would have took Flaming Bob Danny immediately. I love. Because that's who I am inside anyway. You don't know that about me.

[Christine]

No, if I sent you Flaming Bob Dandy, it would have been a thing.

[Bobby Kelly]

I know. It wouldn't have been. I would have loved Flaming Bob.

[Big Jay]

No, you would have needed people to talk you into.

[Bobby Kelly]

You made me into Bobby Josh Adam Myerson.

[Christine]

That's a sexy Bobby.

[Big Jay]

Robert Adam Myers.

[Bobby Kelly]

But Flaming Bob Danny, sexy to men. I like Flaming Bob Dandy.

[Big Jay]

Flaming Bob. Danny's got something to say. I don't know what. That microphone he's got in the other picture. Why is his microphone so long? It's got extenders on it.

[Bobby Kelly]

Liked men.

[Jacob]

Your pursed lips on the. The picture on the right. You have pursed lips.

[Bobby Kelly]

They made me gay. Any way you shake it.

[Jacob]

There's no.

[Big Jay]

It is Bobby's pose.

[Bobby Kelly]

I want you to get me that outfit for this year's Skank Fest.

[Big Jay]

I'm wearing Flamin Bob Dandy.

[Bobby Kelly]

Flamin Bob Dandy's making an appearance at the bonfire.

[Big Jay]

One million percent, 100%.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'm making it. Flamin Bob Dandy's coming.

[Big Jay]

Fuck, yeah. That might be a Josie machine.

[Christine]

I know, Mike. I was like, I have a person I'm gonna send this to right now.

[Big Jay]

She's currently doing. She's currently doing suits for Ari.

[Bobby Kelly]

And I'm gonna do. I'll do the walk. The Skank Fest walk as Flamin Bomb Dandy, buddy.

[Big Jay]

And then. And then I think you do have to. Flaming Bob Danny.

[Bobby Kelly]

The Bonfire Show I will Flamin Bob. Danny's gonna be walking around. I'm gonna be in the cigar lounge as Flamin Bob Dandy.

[Big Jay]

I might be your lovely assistant. I might be Flamin Bob Dandy's lovely assistant.

[Bobby Kelly]

What are you gonna dress as?

[Big Jay]

I don't know. I might have one of those fucking little bunny tails on my ass,

[RZA]

but

[Bobby Kelly]

I should have a little collar on you.

[Big Jay]

Yeah. And I'll be Bear Bear, Bear, Bear. I'm your bear bear.

[Bobby Kelly]

You're my bear bear.

[Big Jay]

You keep me on a leash. Yes, I like that.

[Bobby Kelly]

I like that. And I make you give paw.

[Big Jay]

Oh, buddy. Yes. Dude. You are a flaming homosexual drag queen. And I am your slave. Yeah, I like that.

[Bobby Kelly]

I love it.

[Big Jay]

I'm your slave boy. And you gotta call me. Oh, Bear Bear. Yeah, Bear bear.

[Bobby Kelly]

My bear bear.

[Big Jay]

This is Bear Bear. And I go, I'll roar.

[RZA]

Yes.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's gonna be. That's gonna be fun for an hour. And then we'll be like, look, we gotta get out of this.

[Big Jay]

It's totally fine. I will totally sit there with a leash on my neck tethered to you the entire show, you know.

[Bobby Kelly]

Perfect. That hair thing would fit on my bald head.

[RZA]

Yes.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, God. My. My God, it frames me in so nice.

[Big Jay]

I can't wait to see the appearance of Flamin Bob Dandy at the thing. Flamin Bob Dandy might be like one of the hits of the festival.

[Bobby Kelly]

Flamin Bob Danny in New Orleans. I should write a whole 5 minute set as Flaming Bob Dandy.

[Big Jay]

Please, please.

[Bobby Kelly]

Flamin Bob Dandy.

[Big Jay]

Oh, and we gotta find you a catchphrase. Like you gotta be like

[Bobby Kelly]

my catchphrase. Hey, guy. You know I'm saying I got a pop.

[Big Jay]

Flaming Bob Dandy.

[Bobby Kelly]

Fat robot. Really just still bugs me.

[Big Jay]

It should that you.

[Bobby Kelly]

That that was even considered Fat Bob.

[Big Jay]

It should be the reason that you think you and Christine will never be as close as you could have been.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yep, that's true.

[Big Jay]

Like there's always the sticking point will be that.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, bring up fucking blind old Bob Elixir Kelly. Bring up him.

[Jacob]

The point is though, with all these that Christine is the last. Yep, yep.

[Bobby Kelly]

You were there.

[Jacob]

What's the word I'm looking for?

[Bobby Kelly]

She's the.

[Jacob]

If. If it doesn't. If she's not there, this. This all gets through.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, but she's there. And it would have went through if I didn't go.

[Christine]

No, I sent the email that gave him the art.

[Jacob]

That's for the last line of defense. Was the word I was looking for.

[Bobby Kelly]

They.

[Christine]

They and I missed it.

[Bobby Kelly]

She's the. For me. She would be the last thing.

[Christine]

That's not the one you want.

[Big Jay]

They gave Bobby a plan B and a double sided dildo staff.

[Christine]

Yeah. That he's going to use on this screen.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big Jay]

They gave me a job that doesn't look like that. It looks like he's a fucking weird gay priest who walks around the double sided dildo and what is the can?

[Bobby Kelly]

What am I holding?

[Big Jay]

You're gonna plan B. You're gonna give that girl plan B so she doesn't get pregnant.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'm 55. I'm not getting anybody pregnant. And if I do, they have a hair lip and a fucking sister on their back. Yeah, it's not happening.

[Christine]

That's why they want the plan B.

[Bobby Kelly]

You know what it is? They always make me into some gay guy too.

[Big Jay]

Someone.

[Bobby Kelly]

I have a. I have a like a hint of gay in everything they do.

[Big Jay]

I feel this with some people in my life. There's some people in my life, I feel this. Some people have it in for you.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big Jay]

And they don't even know it.

[Bobby Kelly]

I think they do.

[Big Jay]

I don't know if they do. I think they're like, no, no, we're cool. But there's something. They have something.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's.

[Big Jay]

And I don't know, something about Lewis hires artists.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yep.

[Big Jay]

That got something with you now. They might just be reflecting Lewis's something with you.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's. It's. I. I guarantee there's some type of whisper in somebody's ear from Lou Dog that goes, hey, from the old Diggy make. Do me a favor. Make sure Bob's is up or fat or gay or something. Something like that. 100%.

[Big Jay]

Really?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. Something, something. He whispers in there. Hey, do me a favor. Make mine look badass. Make Jay look awesome. Make skinny Dave look like a. A Navy seal and make Bobby look like a.

[Big Jay]

Do you think. You think it's because fat robot?

[Jacob]

No.

[Big Jay]

Do you think that's because you chatgpt the forward in his book that you wrote?

[Bobby Kelly]

First of all, I didn't chat GPT.

[Big Jay]

Yeah, we read that forward at the festival. It couldn't have been more like good guy. At one point I. I guessed the next line. Did you know that at one point I was reading along Bobby's Ford and he goes, he goes, Lewis is the kind of guy that doesn't like, you know, take no for an answer. And I was like the kind of guy that gets up in the morning and says, how are we gonna attack the day. And then the next line was like. And he does. He never stays down. He always gets up and. But I'm like, holy shit.

[Bobby Kelly]

Literally said the line verbatim.

[Big Jay]

Oh, I forgot. When they made Bobby a fucking. A twink alien.

[Bobby Kelly]

Can I just say something, though? There's no middle ground between fat robot and then this. There's no, like, hey, can you just make me. You didn't have to.

[Big Jay]

Why does he have dark nip spaghetti strap dress on?

[Bobby Kelly]

Because they. There's a conspiracy.

[RZA]

What do you mean?

[Big Jay]

Where. Where he's wearing a spaghetti strap dress with see through nipples.

[Bobby Kelly]

Right there.

[Big Jay]

You keep moving it.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, that.

[Christine]

This here.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. Yes.

[Christine]

We talking about robot arc?

[Bobby Kelly]

No, those.

[Big Jay]

No, they're tattoos, first of all.

[Bobby Kelly]

That's like. I'm. You don't have to make me too skinny. You can make me in the middle. I'm in the middle. Skinny. I'm not skinny. I'm. I'm fine.

[Big Jay]

But why do you have to be gay or fat?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah,

[Big Jay]

Christine, why do you think the artist makes Bobby have to be gay or fat?

[Bobby Kelly]

Right in the middle?

[Christine]

And he hates this too.

[Big Jay]

What's in the middle?

[Bobby Kelly]

Well, first of all, okay, it is.

[Big Jay]

But again, you wouldn't be having any of this. This Bobby has no leg to stand on if they just did anything that would make the face look like Bobby Kelly instead of just basic bald guy. You can. Anyone could draw.

[Bobby Kelly]

It looks like I look like every Yankee fan ever.

[Big Jay]

Yes, exactly.

[Bobby Kelly]

That's what I look like.

[Big Jay]

A firefighter. You look just like a guy.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, I'm every.

[Big Jay]

It doesn't look like you, but there's. There's. There's enough uniqueness to Bobby's face to get his face.

[Bobby Kelly]

Thank you. I have uniqueness in my face.

[Big Jay]

All they got was the bags.

[Bobby Kelly]

And also. Can I just say something? You just made poo come out. That's how angry I don't want poo

[Big Jay]

to come out, buddy.

[Bobby Kelly]

Here's what bugs me too, is that everybody's jerseys. Like, if you look at Lev's, it's tight, it's fitted. They gave me. Look at my arm. Look how wrinkly I have nice shoulders, man. I have. If anything that I have that's good is my arms and my shoulders and my lips.

[Big Jay]

Wait, which picture are you talking about? Look at the one on the right.

[Bobby Kelly]

The one on the right. For this year's skank fest, they gave me some wrinkly, oversized jacket.

[Christine]

It is a distressed jacket.

[Big Jay]

No, Bobby, the jacket's cool.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, but look at my arms. Look at My arms, they could have tightened that up a little bit.

[Big Jay]

Look how broad your shoulder is, Bobby.

[Jacob]

You're a vampire hunter, not a fashion model.

[Big Jay]

No, the picture looks awesome. Except it's not you. It would be a cool character in a cartoon.

[Bobby Kelly]

But they made me the old vampire hunter who is helping the new vampire hunter become a vampire hunter by giving him elixirs. Yeah. I want you godfather. What?

[Christine]

You can't be the godfather and be a young buck.

[Bobby Kelly]

Well, make me.

[Big Jay]

Listen, Bobby, you used to be a double sided dildo carrying priest.

[Christine]

Yeah.

[Big Jay]

Who would give women abortion medicine. But.

[Bobby Kelly]

And don't forget the fat robot with saggy fucking pepperoni tits.

[Big Jay]

Right then though, you found your true calling in life. Elixir wielding vampire hunter.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, I don't get any of it. Now look, I'm not going to throw you under the bus here, okay? But every year your photos, as they should be, are fucking insane. There's no question you've never not looked better than

[Big Jay]

you actually look. For sure.

[Bobby Kelly]

You know what I'm saying? In these, when you have creative license, you can choose to do what you want. You don't have to make somebody.

[Big Jay]

Oh, that sucks.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, that one's not good.

[Jacob]

Terrible.

[Bobby Kelly]

That one's. That was.

[Big Jay]

It's actually using one of my worst pictures too. That was just taken by some guy that. Some guy that. Chris Italia.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'd rather be going to do your

[Big Jay]

head ch for you.

[Bobby Kelly]

Bob Dandy looks way better than Bob Dandy looks.

[Christine]

Jay was kind of a fat robot too.

[Bobby Kelly]

Where they made you a fat astronaut.

[Big Jay]

Yeah, I was a fatronaut. Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

They really did give you a triple X spacesuit.

[Christine]

I think he just posted it me.

[Big Jay]

Oh, yeah. I don't.

[Christine]

Or maybe we had it redone. I don't know.

[Jacob]

I will say as a vampire, a

[Christine]

lot on me

[Jacob]

if we're going with vampire lore, a vampire hunter. Elixirs are completely useless, so it doesn't make any sense.

[Bobby Kelly]

Doesn't make sense. You use elixirs on who?

[Big Jay]

Who?

[Bobby Kelly]

Witches. Witches.

[Big Jay]

How can we never get a picture of the bonfire crew in a thing?

[Bobby Kelly]

That'd be a good one.

[Big Jay]

The bonfires there.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. How can we do that? We have Jacob. Jacob could be a little cat.

[Christine]

We don't really do them for the podcasts and radio shows, but we can.

[Big Jay]

You have no respect for performers though. They're performing at the show.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, they are. And you're part of the show and it's part of your crew. There's never been a bonfire skank fest photo that we could have ever once

[Christine]

Ask Lewis about it.

[Big Jay]

Do you think it's. Cause there's not enough room next to Bobby and me's fat robot to fit the rest of the crew? Because I would argue, I would understand the real estate on a tapestry that big would be a lot.

[Christine]

I came across an awesome Jacob picture from Skankfest. I sent it to him.

[Bobby Kelly]

He didn't even say anything. First of all, you don't. Do you have to run by every. You guys run the festival. Can we just be honest about that? You run it. You and Becca, Rebecca run it. Christine.

[Christine]

No, you have to ask Lewis.

[Bobby Kelly]

Everything. Yeah, everything goes by you, Louis. Wow. Jesus Christ. I'd watch out for both of them. I'd watch out for both of them.

[Christine]

Well, me and Lewis will say Rebecca. They'll say Christine. Me and Rebecca will say Louis. It just goes around and around, all right?

[Big Jay]

Until nobody answers your question.

[Bobby Kelly]

Unbelievable. Well, I just want it tightened up, that's all. I just want a tighter jacket and I want to weapon.

[Christine]

I told you, you're going for the lead filter.

[Big Jay]

And also because I don't think Christine understands right now, can you make it, for Christ's sakes, a little bit taller? Look how tall Bobby is.

[Bobby Kelly]

I mean, come on.

[Big Jay]

Come on.

[Christine]

He's almost touching.

[Big Jay]

Go stand next to Bobby and let him dominate.

[Christine]

I don't want to upset.

[Big Jay]

Let him dominate. You fucking physically get over there and be dominated.

[Bobby Kelly]

Kids, come on. Come here, my little guys.

[Jacob]

This is all a lot.

[Bobby Kelly]

Guys.

[Big Jay]

Look at this teeny little crew.

[Bobby Kelly]

Come stand next to Gulliver.

[Christine]

Am I the same height?

[Bobby Kelly]

No, put your arm down.

[Big Jay]

Stop trying to get up here.

[Bobby Kelly]

Jacob.

[Jacob]

Look at.

[Bobby Kelly]

Look at all these little guys. Look at.

[Big Jay]

All right, Christine, you might want to dip down a little tiny bit because you are towering over Bobby high heels on. Right. She did say that. So. So if you could, like, if you could. If you could kneel down. You kneel down about, I don't know, a foot. Oh, my God, he's bul. They're bul. Bobby right out of the. Christine showed her head over Bobby's head.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah,

[Jacob]

well, only reason you get any ass is cuz you tall.

[Bobby Kelly]

I.

[Big Jay]

It's cuz you tall.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'm taking Max. I'm taking Max in June. Uh, primitive camp camping.

[Big Jay]

Oh, yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

We're gonna go up the mountain and you find a spot and you make camp and, you know. No, nothing.

[Big Jay]

Right. Take a woman, make her yours.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, no, there's no women. It's just me and Max.

[Big Jay]

Use her to breed.

[Bobby Kelly]

But I said, hey, maybe Ari will bring Ari. And he goes, this is what Max said. He goes, yeah, I'd love that, but he's probably going to show us his penis.

[Big Jay]

Yeah, that's what Max has.

[Bobby Kelly]

I was like, yeah, you're probably right, buddy.

[Big Jay]

Man, Uncle Ari's known, huh? Yeah, Uncle Hari is known. What is this first thing? Christine, you got a wiener in the email this morning.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, my God.

[Christine]

Yeah. Or the guy messaged me something else and I just saw it, but I just sent to the group. I used to tweet them, but since you called out to have people send them to me, it feels bad. So I just sent him to the group.

[Bobby Kelly]

Sitting there, having coffee with Don, talking about our day. All of a sudden this thing flops out of my throat.

[Big Jay]

I didn't see it.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, my God.

[Christine]

I said, if I get dick pics, we all get dick pics.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, well, thank you very much.

[Christine]

You're welcome.

[Bobby Kelly]

Really?

[Christine]

I think it's a video doesn't flop around.

[Bobby Kelly]

I didn't push the. I didn't push the button. I'm not gonna push the button.

[Big Jay]

We can't bring it up here to see it.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, you can bring it up.

[Jacob]

How can a penis be that big?

[Big Jay]

I just see a flop around penis. Are you saying you sent it to the group? Because you're like, if I have to deal with it, you have to deal with it. Do you hate dick pics?

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, God, I guess.

[Big Jay]

Depends.

[Christine]

It depends. Listen, if they're solicited or I want them, that's nice, but that. I'm like, do I not like dicks?

[Big Jay]

Let me see.

[Bobby Kelly]

That's pretty.

[Christine]

I thought I liked dicks, but what does it say? He's annoying me.

[Big Jay]

I'm a huge fan of you and the bonfire. That's got a massive cock.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's a massive cock and it has pretty. Has like. It's too big.

[Big Jay]

Sure.

[Bobby Kelly]

Too big.

[Big Jay]

Yeah, I'll accept that.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's too big. And he's very thin. It's.

[Christine]

It's.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's actually.

[Big Jay]

But this upsetting Christine is what? Surprised. Not upsetting you. But everyone's gotta deal with. Oh, no, no. But you're sharing it with like a. If I have to deal with. Everyone's got to deal with. Not like, check out this huge, awesome dick.

[Christine]

Yes.

[Big Jay]

That's not what you're doing.

[Christine]

No, I'm sending it like, hey, guys, I don't know if that dick's gonna make anyone's day.

[Big Jay]

You did know that. You did know it would make my day.

[Christine]

I mean, except for my own boyfriend,

[Jacob]

but the Rest of know, he's a size king.

[Christine]

I know Jay likes a nice swinging dick.

[Bobby Kelly]

He does. Jay loves a nice swinging dick.

[Big Jay]

Yeah, that's true.

[Bobby Kelly]

This guy, though, he looks. He looks very. Here's the thing with this dick. It's. It's perception, right? It's perspective.

[Christine]

I don't know about that.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'm just trying. I'm just trying to come up with excuses.

[Christine]

I think it's, like, hitting his.

[Big Jay]

Is it on the screen yet?

[Bobby Kelly]

It's hitting his.

[Christine]

No, I have to. I have to find it on my.

[Bobby Kelly]

He's. He's a real thin, thin guy and he's. He seems small.

[Jacob]

He seems.

[Big Jay]

Whatever you gotta tell yourself, dude. Yeah, my dick would probably look like that on that body.

[Bobby Kelly]

I mean. I mean. No, this is. I mean, it has. This is why the swing has three different swings. It has shaft swing, mid swing, and then tip swing.

[Big Jay]

Oh, it's literally whipping.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's going in three different directions on the swing.

[Big Jay]

Or is it just doing that move? Like. Like, if you give me a pencil, I can do it where the pencil's going floppy, but it's not. It's optical illusion.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, the. Yeah. Dude, this thing is Christine.

[Big Jay]

Why am I not looking at this copy?

[Christine]

Because I don't know my Instagram password. I'm trying to figure it out.

[Bobby Kelly]

Doesn't know their Instagram. It's swinging dick. One, two, three. I love Cox.

[Big Jay]

I love Cox 69.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big Jay]

You know how much I love Cox 69?

[Bobby Kelly]

It's so easy, though, to send that pic. Like, if I was to send a pic to Christine of my penis, that's taking a risk. That's taking a chance.

[Big Jay]

High risk.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. This guy. Low risk.

[Big Jay]

Extremely low risk.

[Bobby Kelly]

Low risk. Big.

[Big Jay]

I just thought this would be something that Christine would go, oh, nice. A guy wanted me to see his big, huge cock.

[Bobby Kelly]

Like, if I sent the. If I was naked in the camera and I pushed my belly button and then my penis popped out like a mushroom, that's a risk, dude.

[Big Jay]

I get DMs sometimes and it's just. It's a guy being like, hey, look, here's a video of me and my chick and she's sucking my dickers. I'm like, great.

[Bobby Kelly]

I get none of that.

[Big Jay]

It's not all the time. And of any stretch or just like a random girl, it's like, I know you like naked pictures, so here's a naked picture, and it could be from an abominably terrible looking person. And I still go, oh, though. But hey, hey, can I just say you tried.

[Bobby Kelly]

Can I say something real quick?

[Big Jay]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

I love naked pictures.

[Big Jay]

Well, you gotta say that more.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, but people are sending me. Dude, this cigar is great. Have you tried it?

[Big Jay]

Okay, here's a new watch. Yeah, I mean, my wife's really hot, by the way.

[Jacob]

Gentlemen are emailing you.

[Big Jay]

He's like. He's like. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go send Jay a picture of my wife's asshole. Hey, here's a new watch I just picked up. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go. My wife's gonna go take a piss on camera for Jay.

[Bobby Kelly]

I want some titty pics. I want some gash.

[Big Jay]

Save your tits. Straight gash for this guy. Hard fat wang for Christine.

[Bobby Kelly]

And big floppers. Big floppers for Kelly to Dandy Bob.

[Big Jay]

Yeah, I'm pussy butthole. Bobby's tits. Christine's wang and boy butt and man asses also. You can just send Christine. She seems to be upset by your dick pics, so I guess start just sending your asses. Yeah, but send it male asses.

[Bobby Kelly]

Make sure you spread it open as far as you can. She likes to see deep inside.

[Big Jay]

Christine, in hindsight, would you prefer male asses or dick pics?

[Christine]

Dick pics.

[Big Jay]

Okay, well, I guess keep it to dick pics then, fellas, for shits and giggles.

[Bobby Kelly]

If you feel like it's though.

[Big Jay]

What? No one's curious about somebody's ass, but we're all curious about their dicks.

[Jacob]

She said, I don't want dick pics, but now she's saying I take it over an ass.

[Big Jay]

Just trying to look good in the eyes of God.

[Jacob]

But an ass pick is like asshole pick.

[Christine]

Jacob, not ass.

[Jacob]

No, he said ass pick.

[Big Jay]

Bobby said spread open.

[Bobby Kelly]

I suppose. Spread. I mean, you're gonna send a pic. You don't send just the ass pick, stupid.

[Big Jay]

What are you gonna do?

[Bobby Kelly]

Take your thumb and your index and open it up and then actually do like a puppet show.

[Big Jay]

Hey, Christine, how are you? Yeah, do it until those fucking. Those road lines are fucking flat. Gotcha.

[Christine]

Spread. Assholes are for gay men.

[Big Jay]

Yeah, that's.

[Christine]

Who wants to see that?

[Big Jay]

Also, Cox are, too. But Christine likes cocks like a gay man.

[Bobby Kelly]

Did you get that, Lou? Pretty sure it's clean.

[Jacob]

Oh, man.

[Bobby Kelly]

Thank God.

[Christine]

Finger my ass. That's for love. It's edited. Oh, yeah. You can't do shit,

[Big Jay]

Christine. How long do I have to sit here not looking at this guy's cock?

[Christine]

You saw it. I'm trying. I can't.

[Big Jay]

I feel like Rebecca would have Enjoyed that penis picture more than Christine did. Luckily. Luckily, that guy had me in his life to make him feel good about that fucking dong.

[Christine]

Hey, I sent it to you and you didn't even respond.

[Big Jay]

I don't.

[Christine]

You're too busy to look at the bonfire group text.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. You really don't.

[Big Jay]

No, I do when I can.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, no, you don't.

[Christine]

You're missing dongs.

[Bobby Kelly]

You're missing dongs.

[Big Jay]

I am upset I missed that dong.

[Bobby Kelly]

You're missing dogs.

[Big Jay]

But I was happy to see it for the first time with you as a team. Is it nice to watch somebody open a present in front of you? The joy of giving the gift is that watching the person enjoy it.

[Bobby Kelly]

You know what? It does suck. I came in knowing what it was. Yeah, I wish I saw it already.

[Big Jay]

You already made your peace with it. You already, you know, you feel like, all right, that exists. I'm gonna meet this guy at a show and know that I'm shaking hands with a man who has a three times the size car.

[Bobby Kelly]

I had to open in front of dawn to pretend I wasn't fascinated.

[Big Jay]

I gotta tell Christina to stop doing this. I'm gonna go in the other room and text her.

[Christine]

I guess if anyone wants their, you know, dick to be admired by Jay, send them my way.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, yeah. And if you have any boobs, please stop sending them to Jay and send them to me.

[Big Jay]

I just want pussy and asshole.

[Bobby Kelly]

Jay.

[Big Jay]

Jay. Only, like, just right down the barrel. Right down the double barrel.

[Christine]

It's not butthole. Keep it.

[Big Jay]

What a fun show. What a funsy one is.

[Bobby Kelly]

Are we done?

[Big Jay]

Yeah, buddy.

[Bobby Kelly]

Get the.

[Big Jay]

We are done. Well, we're done for the day.

[Bobby Kelly]

We're done for the day.

[Big Jay]

We're done for the show.

[Bobby Kelly]

The man says we're done. We're done, Lou.

[Big Jay]

We're done.

[Bobby Kelly]

You know what? You are the man. You are the man.

[Big Jay]

Bobby Kelly's gonna be at Hilarities in Cleveland, Ohio, May 15th and 16th. Stanford, Connecticut on May 21st. And after that, New Orleans, Mobile, Alabama, Long Island, Austin, Texas. All on deck.

[Bobby Kelly]

I should do a Dandy Bob tour while I'm in. When I'm down in New Orleans.

[Big Jay]

Yeah, test run it. Test run. Dandy. Flaming Bob. Dandy for tickets. And all of his tour hits go to punch up dot live. Robert Kelly, his YouTube page at Robert Kelly Comedy. And of course, like Clockwork, every Tuesday night. Not this last Tuesday night, no. But every other Tuesday night, 7:00pm, the Fat Black Pussycat Lounge at the Comedy Cellar.

[Bobby Kelly]

And Big J, he's going Comedy Connection. In Providence this weekend, one of my favorite clubs. He's gonna be there this weekend, April 30th through the 2nd, right. And then after that, he's gonna be in Los Angeles for Story wars. And he's got a show out there, too. He's gonna be doing a lot of stuff out there for Netflix is a joke fest. And he's heading back to Austin after that. For tickets and tour dates, go to bigjaycomedy.com YouTube.com bigjokerson for his live show and a special. And make sure you send those butt pics. Send them all over. Puss in butt. Puss and butt.

[Big Jay]

Puss and butt. Well, pussy, butthole, titties. To Bobby.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yep.

[Big Jay]

Your big, huge, fat monster cocks. Christine.

[Bobby Kelly]

And all of the above to Jake.

[Big Jay]

And flood Jacob with all of those.

[Bobby Kelly]

Flood it.

[Christine]

Siriusxn.com and make sure you do this.

[Bobby Kelly]

Skankfest New Orleans, November 13th through the 15th Mardi Gras World badges are on sale right now. It's going to sell out. So please go to skankfest.com and get your tickets right now. It's going to be epic.

[Big Jay]

It's going to be epic. And also, of course, keep reminding you, Ari Shafir's new storytelling show. He did the coolest thing with the show. Just the way he's like, making it with all the comics are involved, everyone promotes it, everyone making money off it. He's the right thing. He's. He's fucking awesome. His new storytelling show, the End, is currently out $6 an episode. You could buy them all in one shot for 30 bucks.

[Bobby Kelly]

Seven seats. Seven. Seven.

[Big Jay]

Seven episodes.

[Bobby Kelly]

Seven episodes. It is probably the. I can't believe the comics he's got on this. All your favorite comics. They're all. I would say, how would she put it? Shock comics.

[Big Jay]

Shock comedians.

[Bobby Kelly]

Shock comedians.

[Big Jay]

It's almost exclusively shock comedians.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, it's all shock comedians.

[Big Jay]

So that's not your. If you're looking for a Lenny Marcus, you're not gonna find it.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, you're not. It is unbelievable.

[Big Jay]

Also, if you're looking for a Louis J. Gomez, you're not gonna find it. Oh, it's been a real point of contention. We'll catch you guys next. Oh, I won't be here next week.

[Bobby Kelly]

You won't be here.

[RZA]

Oh, I love you.

[Big Jay]

I'm gonna be calling in, though.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, calling in. Colin Quinn's come in. We got Rich Voss. We got some special guests. So it's. We'll hold down the fort.

[Big Jay]

I'll be giving you live up updates from Netflix and we're gonna be off the week after that.

[Bobby Kelly]

We're off the week.

[Big Jay]

Oh, and then we're back. Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

And then we're back.

[Big Jay]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

Have a great weekend, guys.

[Big Jay]

Peace.

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[Christine]

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[Bobby Kelly]

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[Christine]

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[Bobby Kelly]

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[Bobby Kelly]

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[Bobby Kelly]

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