Pump and Dump

Summary

Podcast Summary: The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly – Episode "Pump and Dump"

Release Date: December 18, 2024
Channel: SiriusXM’s Faction Talk, Channel 103

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1. Introduction and Birthday Celebrations [01:11 – 03:00]

The episode kicks off with Bobby Kelly reminiscing about the day before his birthday. He shares an experience of attending a Wu-Tang Clan concert featuring Ghostface Killah, Raekwon, and GZA alongside his friend Josh Ettemyers. Bobby expresses disappointment over his friend Justin Silver's inability to join due to forgetting to purchase tickets.

Notable Quote:
Bobby Kelly [02:29]: "Justin was supposed to go, but day of, he's like, dude, I'm sorry. I didn’t buy a ticket. I forgot I signed up for something."

2. Understanding "Pump and Dump" [03:00 – 10:00]

The hosts delve into the term "pump and dump," initially discussing its traditional meaning in stock markets. However, the conversation quickly shifts to its alternative, more humorous interpretation related to a scheduled sexual event. Justin explains his involvement in cryptocurrency trading, humorously intertwining it with the "pump and dump" scenario.

Notable Quote:
Justin Silver [05:00]: "This crypto trading thing that I'm doing."

3. Online Dating Platforms and "Sniffies" [10:00 – 19:00]

Bobby and Big Jay introduce "Sniffies," an online platform focused on explicit content. The hosts humorously critique the platform's design, particularly its emphasis on anonymity and the portrayal of users' bodies. They debate the implications of anonymity in online interactions, especially in adult content.

Notable Quote:
Bobby Kelly [16:12]: "How many didgeridoos are there? Well, there's 40 set didgeridoos and then it's. You're getting a percentage of those now."

4. The UFO Drones Phenomenon [19:00 – 43:00]

A significant portion of the episode centers around mysterious car-sized drones spotted over New Jersey. Big Jay shares his skepticism, questioning the legality and purpose of such massive drones. The conversation oscillates between genuine curiosity and comedic disbelief, with references to popular culture and conspiracy theories about UFOs and alien technology.

Notable Quotes:
Big Jay Oakerson [37:36]: "They're drones. They have to be, but they were flying like a couple hundred feet off the ground."
Bobby Kelly [43:00]: "So you think they're scouting for something bigger? Like some Cloverfield shit is coming?"

5. Political Banter and Governor Murphy's Scandal [43:00 – 52:00]

The hosts transition to political humor, discussing New Jersey Governor Phil Murphy's alleged misuse of taxpayer money for personal expenses. They mockingly speculate about his governance and potential re-election, interweaving personal anecdotes and exaggerated criticisms.

Notable Quote:
Bobby Kelly [54:32]: "Governor Murphy scandal. This piece of shit."

6. Stereotypes and Observations about Jersey [52:00 – 61:00]

Bobby and Big Jay explore various stereotypes associated with Jersey residents, contrasting North and South Jersey dynamics. They humorously dissect cultural nuances, fashion choices, and behavioral traits, painting a caricatured picture of the region's inhabitants.

Notable Quote:
Big Jay Oakerson [57:17]: "That's Jersey, dude. Yeah. A lot of moocs. That's Jersey. I love it."

7. Upcoming Shows and Promotions [61:00 – End]

As the episode winds down, the hosts promote their upcoming comedy shows and specials. They encourage listeners to subscribe to their YouTube channels and attend live events in various locations, including St. Louis and West Palm Beach. The segment is filled with typical podcast enthusiasm and playful teasing.

Notable Quote:
Bobby Kelly [61:01]: "Subscribe to my YouTube while you're at it too. We want to release specials soon. So please."

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Conclusion

In this episode of "The Bonfire," Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly blend personal stories, comedic explorations of contemporary issues like online dating and cryptocurrency, and lighthearted political satire. Their dynamic conversation, punctuated with humorous banter and relatable anecdotes, offers listeners an entertaining glimpse into their perspectives on everyday topics and bizarre occurrences alike.

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Noteworthy Moments:

• [02:08] Bobby’s humorous lament about tangled headphones in sandwich wrappers.
• [10:15] The playful invention of fictional cryptocurrency names like "Poof Coin" and "Didgeridoo Coin."
• [37:00] The heated debate over the legitimacy of the car-sized drones versus typical planes.
• [45:00] The mock explanation of Governor Murphy's actions and the exaggerated portrayal of Jersey residents.

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Final Thoughts:

For fans of candid and comedic discussions that traverse a wide array of topics—from personal milestones and pop culture to technology mysteries and political satire—this episode of "The Bonfire" delivers in spades. Bobby Kelly and Big Jay Oakerson's chemistry and quick-witted exchanges ensure a lively and engaging listening experience.

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Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ on Apple Podcasts to listen to "The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly" ad-free and a whole week early.

Transcript

[Bobby Kelly]

High Five Casino, everybody. High Five Casino lets you play your favorite slot in live table games like blackjack. With the chance to redeem for real cash prizes.

[Big J. Okerson]

High Five Casino has a giant selection of over 1200 games, including hundreds of exclusive games only found on High Five Casino. It's always free to play, and free coins are given out every four hours.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh. Are you ready to have Your own High 5 moment? Visit high5casino.com. That's high the number 5casino.com. No purchase necessary. Void were prohibited by law. Must be 21 years or older. Terms and conditions apply.

[Commercial Voice]

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[Bobby Kelly]

And now the bonfire with Big J. Okerson and Robert Kelly.

[Big J. Okerson]

Wrap you up in so and so.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wu Tang forever. Wu Tang's for the kids. Bonfire Faction Talk Series 6M 103. These chopped cheese is ruining our lives. Nothing looks fatter than having your headphones wrapped up in a sandwich wrapper. Tangled up with a sandwich. God damn it. I'm tangled in a sandwich again. This is Wu Tang fourth chamber. I believe it's called off of enter the 36 chambers. The original. Right? Is that also correct? But me and Christina. I didn't mean to talk about that. Me and Christina. Josh Ettemyers went to go see Ghostface, Raekwon and the GZA on the day before my birthday, Friday night.

[Big J. Okerson]

Happy birthday, buddy.

[Bobby Kelly]

Thank you.

[Big J. Okerson]

What'd you do for your birthday?

[Bobby Kelly]

Nothing.

[Big J. Okerson]

I got you a Christmas birthday present. Christine present.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J. Okerson]

It's all in one.

[Bobby Kelly]

Anna. Christine. Nice.

[Big J. Okerson]

Well, it's everything. I love it and you're gonna love it. I'm excited, Very excited about it.

[Bobby Kelly]

So, yeah. The day before my birthday, we went to this concert. Justin was supposed to go, I'm gonna.

[Big J. Okerson]

Teach you after you use it, though.

[Bobby Kelly]

Okay.

[Big J. Okerson]

I'm gonna have to, like, come over.

[Bobby Kelly]

And teach you a handgun.

[Big J. Okerson]

No, it's not a handgun. I would never give you a handgun.

[Bobby Kelly]

What is it, a pocket pussy?

[Big J. Okerson]

No, it's not a pocket pussy.

[Bobby Kelly]

Show me. Don't tell Me how to use it. Bobby, show me.

[Big J. Okerson]

You have a pocket pussy at your house.

[Bobby Kelly]

Christine?

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, she's your pussy.

[Bobby Kelly]

But, yeah, we went to go see.

[Big J. Okerson]

What you say we went.

[Bobby Kelly]

We went to go see.

[Christine]

I was trying to guess what it was behind Cheeseback.

[Big J. Okerson]

You'll never guess.

[Bobby Kelly]

Well, don't guess. But the.

[Big J. Okerson]

I would love a guess.

[Bobby Kelly]

But on Friday night, we got tickets. We went to go see with Josh Edemires. So it was Ghostface, Raekwon, gza. Justin Silver was supposed to go. This is one of my favorite. You know when someone's making that I can't go or I forgot to get a ticket or something. So I told him. I was like, hey, night for my birthday, we're going. You say you love Wu Tang, dude. Like, three members of Wu Tang performed right out back at my house, Terminal 5. He's like. He's like, yeah, dude, that sounds awesome. And then day of, he's like. He goes, dude, I'm sorry. I didn't buy a ticket. I'm not able to go tonight. I forgot I signed up for something.

[Big J. Okerson]

Just something.

[Bobby Kelly]

I signed up for something.

[Big J. Okerson]

He didn't tell you what it was?

[Bobby Kelly]

No. In fact, if you called him on the line right now, we can't give any kind of note. If you say, have him call in, it's a waste of time. I'll just call him. If you get immediately and be like, he goes, dude, what's that thing you signed up for that you couldn't go to the concert for? All right, and then I promise you, if it goes. If he goes, it's already a lie.

[Big J. Okerson]

So if we get an arm, he's lying.

[Bobby Kelly]

If it starts with it's a lie.

[Jacob]

Because it's fucking bullshit.

[Bobby Kelly]

Thank you, Jake.

[Big J. Okerson]

Here he goes. Oh, it's ringing right away, by the way.

[Bobby Kelly]

What?

[Big J. Okerson]

This is off the Liquid Swords.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, yeah. It's off the Jizz's album. Yeah. Damn it. I blew it.

[Big J. Okerson]

He's not gonna answer. He's napping. I don't sleep well.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'm riding the dogs.

[Big J. Okerson]

Hey, Bobby. Hey, Justin. You're live on the bonfire. Nice. Hey, what did you sign up for this last weekend? What'd you sign up for?

[Justin Silver]

Oh, that would be none of your business.

[Bobby Kelly]

Good answer. Wow, that's a good answer.

[Big J. Okerson]

I mean, Jay told me you signed up for something. I was like, what? He's like, I don't know.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, no.

[Justin Silver]

You want me to tell you honestly?

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah. Yes, I'd love for honest.

[Justin Silver]

This inside, like this crypto trading thing that I'm doing.

[Big J. Okerson]

What?

[Justin Silver]

This crypto trading thing that I'm doing.

[Big J. Okerson]

With the Huck Tool girl.

[Justin Silver]

What?

[Big J. Okerson]

Huh?

[Bobby Kelly]

I don't know who that is.

[Justin Silver]

I'm trying to buy a. I'm trying to. Listen, Jay's not moving to Jersey. He doesn't mean this city, all right? I'm moving to that goddamn neighborhood, too.

[Big J. Okerson]

You're moving to. You're moving to near Jay?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Justin Silver]

So I need to flip some coin here, which means maybe I don't see Wu Tang, and I just deal with this.

[Big J. Okerson]

Why? Why are you moving towards. Why are you moving to where Jay is?

[Justin Silver]

Because you think I'm gonna let him leave me?

[Big J. Okerson]

Is this something going on I don't know about?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, there's nothing going on.

[Justin Silver]

You think I'm gonna let him just, like, leave this?

[Bobby Kelly]

He's not just gonna be ignored, Bobby.

[Justin Silver]

I'm not gonna be ignored, Dan.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, he's gonna cook Dawkins in a big cauldron.

[Big J. Okerson]

First of all. Hey, that's from.

[Justin Silver]

That's from. That's from Fatal.

[Big J. Okerson]

Don't ever call me Dan. I didn't call you Dan. You did. That's from Fatal Track. We don't mention that name.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, no. It is from the movie. But it is great that it was Dan.

[Big J. Okerson]

Hey, listen. Well, I moved out of the city. You didn't move where I moved.

[Justin Silver]

You and I are close, but me and Jay, like, lay in bed together sometimes.

[Big J. Okerson]

I didn't know you wanted to lay in bed with me. I didn't know that.

[Justin Silver]

I ever see a relationship with Jay's girlfriend. We have a whole thing going on.

[Big J. Okerson]

What? What? You have a doggy relationship with Christine.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's beyond dogs.

[Justin Silver]

It's a little beyond that.

[Big J. Okerson]

What do you guys talk about?

[Bobby Kelly]

You guys girl gab.

[Big J. Okerson]

Do you guys girl gab? You two little quims muling all weekend?

[Justin Silver]

You know, maybe we'll discuss swatches for couches. Maybe we won't.

[Bobby Kelly]

Daddy's. Daddy's off earning.

[Big J. Okerson]

Do you guys do feet, like, massages on each other and do each other's cuticles and put, like, little face masks on?

[Bobby Kelly]

Daddy's off churning.

[Big J. Okerson]

You're not gay.

[Justin Silver]

No.

[Bobby Kelly]

To Christine's unfucked pussy.

[Big J. Okerson]

Have you ever. Have you ever. Have you guys ever taken a nap together?

[Justin Silver]

I don't think so.

[Bobby Kelly]

No.

[Big J. Okerson]

Okay. All right. So you did a crypto.

[Justin Silver]

Me and Jay taking a nap.

[Big J. Okerson]

I know you nap with that teddy bear before, and that put.

[Justin Silver]

The teddy bear.

[Big J. Okerson]

You nap. I would nap with it, too.

[Justin Silver]

I have boundaries with Christine. I'm very good about that.

[Big J. Okerson]

Okay. All right. Well, all right. Well, no, that's it. We just wanted to see what the hell you missed a reunion of most of Wu Tang for.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, no, no.

[Justin Silver]

I know, but I signed up for this thing and I was like, you know. Well, I've already paid for it, so, you know.

[Big J. Okerson]

All right, buddy. Well, did you have fun in your.

[Jacob]

Class and Saturday night evening crypto?

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah. What was it, a Friday.

[Bobby Kelly]

Friday evening crypto?

[Big J. Okerson]

A Friday crypto? Well, no, no, no, no.

[Justin Silver]

So it's. It's in another. So it takes place in another country. So the times are always a little up.

[Big J. Okerson]

What. What the are you doing, dude?

[Justin Silver]

Australia.

[Big J. Okerson]

What's going on, dude?

[Justin Silver]

So someday it's like they start late. It's on weekends. It's a whole. I'm committed, man.

[Bobby Kelly]

Do me a favor. Look up Australia time right now. What time is it in Australia?

[Big J. Okerson]

It's. It's tomorrow.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's tomorrow.

[Big J. Okerson]

It's tomorrow.

[Bobby Kelly]

But what time tomorrow?

[Big J. Okerson]

7:00. 7:00. What time is it in Australia at 7:00?

[Bobby Kelly]

9:00. So it's 9:00am right now.

[Christine]

So 9:00am tomorrow.

[Big J. Okerson]

So it'll be 11.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's 9:00am tomorrow.

[Big J. Okerson]

It'll be 11. When he did the class, it would be 11:00am in Australia.

[Justin Silver]

Fact checking me to make sure I wasn't lying to you?

[Bobby Kelly]

No, no. 8:00.

[Justin Silver]

I'm sick of this.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, yeah.

[Big J. Okerson]

Why are you sick of this?

[Justin Silver]

Like, the lack of trust. As if, like, we know, like, this is absurd.

[Big J. Okerson]

It's not absurd. We go to a farm like three times a year. We don't know. You do up there. Okay, you do some weird that we're trying to figure out.

[Bobby Kelly]

Justin, you do live a life of secrecy.

[Big J. Okerson]

Weird. I do.

[Justin Silver]

I'm.

[Bobby Kelly]

You. I'm.

[Justin Silver]

I'm very forthcoming and open. I don't lie to anybody in this family.

[Big J. Okerson]

All right?

[Bobby Kelly]

Okay. You know, I'm not a fan, Justin. Oh, well, Peter, Jacob's right here.

[Jacob]

I'm here.

[Justin Silver]

Do you, you understand what I'm saying here with this, with the lot, with like the. Let's just double check to make sure Justin's not. You know what I'm saying? Yes.

[Jacob]

No, not really.

[Big J. Okerson]

No, he does not.

[Bobby Kelly]

Jacob, come on, dude, That's a pivot right there.

[Justin Silver]

I have no friends here.

[Big J. Okerson]

We love you, dude. That's why we're concerned about.

[Bobby Kelly]

That's why I wanted you to come to watch three members of the Wu.

[Big J. Okerson]

Tang Clan on his birthday.

[Bobby Kelly]

On my birthday, no less.

[Justin Silver]

Jay, I called you three times. I felt bad about it. I Called you. I texted you. I texted you again. You didn't get back to me. I felt bad about. Because I was like, I did this way before then, and I didn't realize until I went to buy the tickets. It was like, well, same night as this thing that I had.

[Bobby Kelly]

I hope you have a good time buying Australian bitcoins.

[Justin Silver]

Bitcoins are not. They're not. There's no such thing as.

[Bobby Kelly]

What's it called?

[Justin Silver]

Bitcoin.

[Bobby Kelly]

Dingo Coin.

[Justin Silver]

Centralized currency.

[Bobby Kelly]

Jack.

[Big J. Okerson]

What is it? What kind of coin is it?

[Justin Silver]

I'm not going to talk to you.

[Bobby Kelly]

Opera House Corn.

[Big J. Okerson]

Why? Why can't we. We can't get in on the bitcoin.

[Bobby Kelly]

You didn't sign up for the thing. Bobby.

[Justin Silver]

You can call me off the air.

[Big J. Okerson]

Is it something that you're creating?

[Justin Silver]

No.

[Bobby Kelly]

Bobby. Oh, Mo Coin.

[Big J. Okerson]

So what do you. So you're investing?

[Bobby Kelly]

Is it called fake coin?

[Big J. Okerson]

Yes. Is it gay coin?

[Bobby Kelly]

I like the word. Faye Fay coin.

[Big J. Okerson]

All right, wait.

[Bobby Kelly]

What's a good. What's a good. What's a good British Poofta. Poofta Coin.

[Big J. Okerson]

Poof. The coin.

[Bobby Kelly]

Poof. Coin.

[Big J. Okerson]

Is this for nook Coin. So.

[Justin Silver]

No, that's Canadian.

[Big J. Okerson]

All right. So. All right. So you did a crypto. How long was the class?

[Justin Silver]

Two hours.

[Big J. Okerson]

Two hours. Wow, that's a lot. So you sat in your house on a zoom call for two hours learning things.

[Justin Silver]

No, it wasn't a zoom call. It was part of this, like, back end forum thing. So it shows through, it streams, like through their back end thing. It wasn't zoom.

[Big J. Okerson]

Back end.

[Bobby Kelly]

Nice.

[Big J. Okerson]

Nice.

[Bobby Kelly]

Back end coin.

[Big J. Okerson]

So did you. Did you. Did you make money? Did you. Did you do what you were supposed to do?

[Justin Silver]

I told you what I'm doing.

[Bobby Kelly]

Right? No.

[Big J. Okerson]

No.

[Justin Silver]

Whatever house is next to Jay's house is going to be my house. If there's people in there, I will buy them out and they will work for me as slaves.

[Bobby Kelly]

That's what's going on from Kangaroo.

[Justin Silver]

I'm at that certain level of income. You will be the first to know.

[Bobby Kelly]

Simply from Vegemite coin. I'm running out of. I'm almost out of Australian things.

[Big J. Okerson]

Tim. Jam coins?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. Oh, you mean the. That's not a knife. This is a knife. Coin. Is this Foster's Australian for coin?

[Big J. Okerson]

You got it right before me. I was gonna say it's Foster's Australian.

[Bobby Kelly]

For bitcoin, Australian for coin.

[Justin Silver]

So I was taking a sip of my drink. I had the thought, though.

[Big J. Okerson]

So listen, so you took a course for a couple hours on a Friday night and you're trying to buy the house next to J's, and that's where you're going to live.

[Justin Silver]

I don't know where the word trying is in this vocabulary. I am doing.

[Big J. Okerson]

You're buying.

[Justin Silver]

There's no trying, Bobby.

[Bobby Kelly]

There's only doing.

[Big J. Okerson]

Are you going to. Are you going to build like, diddy tunnels?

[Bobby Kelly]

No, I want him to have a. But I want him to have a window that he could stand in at night and stare at me and Christine. Sleep.

[Big J. Okerson]

You wake up while he just sits.

[Bobby Kelly]

While he sits in a rocking chair.

[Justin Silver]

While the other one sleeps.

[Bobby Kelly]

But. Yeah, like an attic. But like an attic window. Almost like the Amityville window. And I want you sitting in there and constantly turning a light on and off while you stare at asleep.

[Justin Silver]

I get it. Like a.

[Bobby Kelly]

Like a.

[Justin Silver]

Like a.

[Big J. Okerson]

Like a.

[Justin Silver]

Like a house. The window in the movie Psycho. Like that though. The triangle windows.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, Amityville. The Amityville windows.

[Big J. Okerson]

I would say the crow window.

[Bobby Kelly]

Sure, the crow window. Whatever it is. I just want him turning a light on and off constantly while he stares at me.

[Big J. Okerson]

And Christine sleeps in a rocking chair. Naked.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J. Okerson]

You're gonna wake up in the middle of night. While you're sleeping, she's gonna be flicking her bean in the window to that brawley.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, I'm on the road a lot.

[Justin Silver]

I don't know.

[Bobby Kelly]

Dump me.

[Christine]

I'm trying to fuck Justin.

[Bobby Kelly]

He's right next door. You might as well.

[Big J. Okerson]

Hey. Might as well fuck Justin.

[Bobby Kelly]

You might as well. All right, Justin, I'm rooting for you, buddy. I hope that your Australian coin thing goes good.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, dude.

[Bobby Kelly]

It makes funny better. They weren't very. They weren't very good. Well, the Australian stream coin. Yeah, Australian back end. Stream. Australian back end coin.

[Big J. Okerson]

Do you have to use a rain stick when you sell it?

[Justin Silver]

No, I.

[Bobby Kelly]

But I have to.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah.

[Justin Silver]

I have to bring an aborigines man to eat a bat.

[Bobby Kelly]

Didgeridoo coin.

[Big J. Okerson]

A didgeridoo.

[Bobby Kelly]

How many didgeridoos are there? Well, there's 40 set didgeridoos and then it's. You're getting a percentage of those now. You understand Bitcoin. All right, well, we love you, buddy. Look forward to your millions.

[Big J. Okerson]

Look forward to your millions and your new house and congratulations.

[Bobby Kelly]

New house. The house next door to me. Super stoked.

[Big J. Okerson]

And we'll see you in the studio soon. Come in soon.

[Justin Silver]

No, I'd love to. I'll come in soon.

[Bobby Kelly]

Well, don't sign up for anything.

[Big J. Okerson]

Bye bye coin. That still didn't clear Anything up?

[Bobby Kelly]

Hey, get yourself some coin.

[Big J. Okerson]

I took a back end course in a room.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J. Okerson]

Back end.

[Bobby Kelly]

Seems like it sounds like it could have been streamed at any time. He could have watched it. If he paid for it, he could have watched it. When is it done? Could he? That's what we should ask. Could you not watch it now? Could you not rewatch it now?

[Big J. Okerson]

Of course you could. You paid for it.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, he had to do it, like, the live version. That wasn't live. It was a pre recorded thing. He didn't want to go. He forgot to buy a ticket.

[Big J. Okerson]

I 100%.

[Bobby Kelly]

And he got Jewish.

[Big J. Okerson]

He hasn't only fans. He's on Dicks and Butts. He's on Sniffies.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, for sure.

[Big J. Okerson]

He was doing a pump and dump that night to make extra cash.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, man. Speaking of that, when I was leaving Skanks last night. He loves you. I know. When I was talking when I leaving Skanks last night, this couple came up to me and the girl was like. She goes, oh, my God. She goes, I do porn and, like, cam stuff. And it's like whenever I. When there's downtime, I always, like, tell people, like, listen to the bonfire and listen to blah, blah, blah. I'm like, oh, awesome. I go, where do I find that? And just eight times when she tried to say it, just someone was coming up and she. And I would just hear like, blah, blah, blah, Cam soda. Cam soda. Blah, blah, blah, jerk mate. And I was like, no. I walked out not having any idea.

[Big J. Okerson]

God damn it.

[Bobby Kelly]

No idea whatsoever. But I was trying to discreetly say, where can I watch your pornography while I shake hands with your boyfriend who loves me? Never got that porn. Never got that porn. Something on Cam Soda.

[Big J. Okerson]

We brought it up when Ari was here last week when crazy Ira's here. Sniffies, where it's just dicks and Butts. Oh, yeah, it has the map. It's like. It's like the. The disgusting Grinder. There's Grinder and then there's Sniffies, where it's just. They do the pump and dump.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, this is just like. To fucking leave guy will just be.

[Big J. Okerson]

Like, dude, I'm doing a pump and dump Friday night at my apartment, and you can sign up and just go and pump and dump.

[Jacob]

You don't see the person, the people's.

[Big J. Okerson]

Faces, Dicks and butts. It's just dicks and bucks.

[Bobby Kelly]

The pictures.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, it's just dicks and bucks.

[Bobby Kelly]

You didn't bring it up?

[Big J. Okerson]

No, we can't. You can.

[Bobby Kelly]

Why can't You?

[Big J. Okerson]

I don't know. She couldn't.

[Jacob]

It's a block. It's blocked. She's blocked.

[Bobby Kelly]

Particularly blocked from this thing. That means something's going on. Funny. Up top.

[Big J. Okerson]

It's, it's.

[Christine]

It's a location.

[Bobby Kelly]

They have to stop Jim. Did they have to stop? Jim McClure. Jim McClure. Is it officially true that you've been going on Sniffy so much that they. That they blocked it on all computers here because you can't be trusted? Oh, there goes Jim doing coke off of hooker's pussy again.

[Big J. Okerson]

I bet you could. I bet if you found out exactly where Justin is right now, he, his dick or butt would be on Sniffies.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh absolutely. I'd recognize his wiener.

[Big J. Okerson]

Oh you would?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, I have a picture on my phone of it.

[Big J. Okerson]

We could do that. I wish we'd get on Sniffy's right now because you can look and see their wiener and guess if it's them. Oh, you know where he lives?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, for sure.

[Big J. Okerson]

So if his.

[Bobby Kelly]

He lives in the gayest part of New York City.

[Big J. Okerson]

He lives in Chelsea. Yeah.

[Jacob]

Bobby, what if it's great body, no face? You don't know until they show up.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, I know Justin's dick. He's present.

[Jacob]

What do you mean you're saying they only see.

[Big J. Okerson]

I love your fake inquisitiveness.

[Bobby Kelly]

Now if some lunatic was to go on this site looking for some late night cock, what do you think?

[Big J. Okerson]

Would you be able to notice the.

[Jacob]

I'm just saying.

[Bobby Kelly]

Well, I'm just wondering if someone was.

[Big J. Okerson]

To go on this guys want to go on there.

[Bobby Kelly]

If somebody was going to go on.

[Big J. Okerson]

And not show their face. Yeah, just show their dick or butt.

[Christine]

Do you not know the gay men sex thing? Like I'll tell you what dude, if.

[Bobby Kelly]

My this guy's wearing white tighty whities, he's got a great body. I'll tell you this. If I was getting crammed up my constantly and that hole was all damaged up like that, of all times I wouldn't wear white form fitting underwear. It would be this time.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, but gay guys, dude, keep their pristine.

[Bobby Kelly]

So do I.

[Big J. Okerson]

Like I said gay guys. Oh, that's keep their asshole.

[Bobby Kelly]

Guys gotta be gay. He loves a clean asshole. I like to sometimes finger my own ass before I eat a sandwich. Okay.

[Big J. Okerson]

And you wonder why you shit in your pants.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'm fine.

[Jacob]

I mean I wouldn't go on a website with like women that only show face down, neck down.

[Big J. Okerson]

Why?

[Jacob]

Because you don't know how they look. So what, what do you mean because.

[Big J. Okerson]

You'Re looking at the.

[Bobby Kelly]

Well, this is a pump and dump site saying so it doesn't really matter if the girl's jacked face and it's nice bod you. You're just there to anyway. Yeah.

[Big J. Okerson]

You're not there to kiss and talk. You get pump and dump and move on. Go get a sandwich.

[Bobby Kelly]

So what difference would it make?

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, what do you care? I'd be more sad.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'd be more sad on Sniffies because I would do better with my face than I would with my. And dick.

[Big J. Okerson]

Some of the dicks on there are nice.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh yeah. I'd show a little top too. Like this though.

[Big J. Okerson]

You do Top tussy.

[Bobby Kelly]

A little top. Look at that. My little. My little fucking butt cleavage.

[Jacob]

Three quarter to see.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. Guys, that guy's ass crack looks like fucking Dolly Parton's tit cleavage. Dude, it comes in from both sides.

[Big J. Okerson]

I mean, gay guys have nice asses.

[Bobby Kelly]

Well, yeah. You said they have to, remember?

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah. I just don't like the little tusk of hair coming out of the top of it.

[Bobby Kelly]

Why not? I wish you grow up.

[Big J. Okerson]

I don't know. Because it looks like an upside down pussy.

[Bobby Kelly]

It really does. Is that Christine, please. Is that Sniffy scrolling down?

[Big J. Okerson]

Please scroll down. Scroll down. We're at Sniffies on Instagram. I get. Apparently you can go there and you.

[Bobby Kelly]

Can check out all Sniffies in my hometown.

[Big J. Okerson]

Sniffies.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J. Okerson]

There you go. So here we go. Here we go.

[Bobby Kelly]

Whoa. In this house, every day is cake. It says was a man's buttless thing. Question. Why was the need for jock strap to be assless? Is it so you can protect your dick and balls and get in the ass at the same time? Because I don't understand why there was no. I never understood it. When I had to wear it, I would wear A lot of people. Did I wear underwear under them? For sure. But it's a stupid fucking concept.

[Big J. Okerson]

Well, because you didn't have to wear double underwear.

[Jacob]

Well, what is this?

[Bobby Kelly]

No, but why don't they just have that? But there's underwear you could just fucking.

[Big J. Okerson]

Because if it was underwear, it needs to attach. The cup needs to attach firmly.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's just a pocket in the front.

[Big J. Okerson]

It needs to. But it attaches firmly to the balls and penis. So there's no. If it was an underwear, there'd be a little gap on the bottom.

[Bobby Kelly]

So Pro Jockstrap.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, yeah. My name was Pro Job Jockstrap Kelly.

[Bobby Kelly]

Jock strap Bob.

[Big J. Okerson]

Jockstrap Bob. In high school.

[Bobby Kelly]

I remember your years as Jockstrap Bob, Boston University's premier radio dj.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, dude, you. You would have to. It keeps the cup up and tight.

[Bobby Kelly]

Bobby, I'm sorry. I'm trying to talk the world out of hiding men's butts in locker rooms. I know you live for this.

[Christine]

Ever come across this guy at all?

[Big J. Okerson]

Of course.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, I haven't, but I mean, like, you know, emotionally.

[Christine]

He's a workout guy. He's just got this huge ass. I don't know if it's fake or what, but I mean, he's got to be gay.

[Big J. Okerson]

What's his name? What's his. Oh, my God, he's sweating through it.

[Christine]

Nunzi.

[Big J. Okerson]

Nunzi.

[Christine]

Yeah, it's like N, U, N, Z, Z, I, I, I, I. This is TikTok. I thought he was on Instagram.

[Bobby Kelly]

Now. You said, have we come across him? Christine asking that because I assume you come across him.

[Big J. Okerson]

Wow.

[Jacob]

Well, describe what we're seeing.

[Bobby Kelly]

The gayest, muscliest guy, the gayest guy in the world that you're not gonna calling the F word to his face.

[Big J. Okerson]

He's wearing yoga, everything.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, for sure.

[Big J. Okerson]

From top to bottom. And he's.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, he dresses like a lady who.

[Christine]

Is pastel yoga pants.

[Bobby Kelly]

He dresses. He dresses in woman's workout clothes, but.

[Christine]

Like that on a man.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, well, because no one man dresses like that. You're not supposed to.

[Jacob]

He's wearing like that. The pants that the. The line goes in, touches his asshole.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, it's those kind. It's those. The Lululemons. Some brand does that where they. They actually have. It's like.

[Christine]

Oh, the scrunchie.

[Bobby Kelly]

It like, does circles, like around your ass crack.

[Big J. Okerson]

He has no body fat, though. Zero body fat, all muscle. And his ass, if you. If you saw him from the waist down, that's a woman's ass. I'll tell you this lady's ass.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'll tell you this. Whatever this guy is, whatever his pronouns are, his things. Badass. You put your dick in it. Yeah, you're coming.

[Big J. Okerson]

I mean, I don't know.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'm saying if you're against this, if you're homophobic, if you're anti gay, you put your dick inside that butt right there, you're finished.

[Big J. Okerson]

You put your dick inside that butt at any angle, you're coming from the top.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, yeah. If I. You're right. If I, like, hold his ankle. Here's what I'm picturing. He's sort of on his side. All right, Bobby, picture this. Yeah, he's sort of on his side, right? Yeah, like he's laying like this.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

And I've got this ankle way up in the air, and I'm. I'm giving the biz this direction, seeing with every pump his dick and balls that are laying on this leg moving. And I'm not into that. I don't play that gay shit, Bob. You know that about me.

[Big J. Okerson]

Of course you don't.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'm straight through and through. But I'll tell you this right now, even in that position, you're coming. I'm coming.

[Big J. Okerson]

You're coming.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'm coming.

[Big J. Okerson]

If I was coming from the other side, up at the top of his. Where his back meets his crack, and I just put my helmet in the top while you were coming on the other side.

[Bobby Kelly]

Got you.

[Big J. Okerson]

I would. I'm coming.

[Bobby Kelly]

You're still gonna come?

[Big J. Okerson]

I'm coming that way.

[Bobby Kelly]

Absolutely come that way. If we both find ourselves at the same time inside of this guy, here's what I'm picturing. I named this move a long time ago. It's called 9 11. The fall of the Twin Towers. Me and you scissor like this, and then our dicks mush up like that.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

And then that's the Twin Towers. And then he comes down sitting on them where? Now, one of the four walls that is touching that is housing my penis.

[Big J. Okerson]

Right.

[Bobby Kelly]

Is your penis. One of those four walls is your penis. And this guy. The other three are this guy's inner asshole.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah. I'm coming on you.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'm still coming.

[Big J. Okerson]

I'm going to come on your cup.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, absolutely.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J. Okerson]

You're going to. It's going to be. It's going to look like one of those ice creams. Vanilla and chocolate ice cream.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh. And if you finish first and pull out, I'm just going to feel bad. I'm like, damn, did I feel bad. It's like how me and Christine say we feel if one of us finishes our burger first, the person who still has burger left. You're jealous of them. It's the same thing, you know?

[Big J. Okerson]

I mean, equate to sex.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. You come. You come and then you dip out. And then you're gonna be sitting there on the sidelines going, damn, why did I come so fast? And I'm gonna even be like, damn, did I miss Bobby's dick in here with me?

[Big J. Okerson]

We could just come out together.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. No, I'm not gay.

[Big J. Okerson]

Oh, yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

So fucking come out of what? Talking.

[Big J. Okerson]

All right. I just got crazy, that's all.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'm not coming at the same time as you, dude. I'm not some fucking queer. I hate this guy.

[Big J. Okerson]

I, by the way, I hate this.

[Bobby Kelly]

Guy for like the wrong. This is like, when I see this, this goes. I'm very liberal with all this kind of stuff, but I go, oh, this guy makes me hate gays. And I don't even know if he's gay, but he has to be, right?

[Big J. Okerson]

This guy makes me want to be gay.

[Bobby Kelly]

Does he really?

[Big J. Okerson]

I mean, dude, that's a girl ass. Oh, God.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, you can see Matthew Lane right between those bad boys.

[Big J. Okerson]

Jesus Christ. Don does not have an ass like that.

[Christine]

Nobody does.

[Commercial Voice]

It's.

[Christine]

I don't know how it's real.

[Jacob]

I think it's fake and he works out. I think he got a lift.

[Christine]

It doesn't look fake.

[Big J. Okerson]

Steve Byrne has a better ass and he works out. Steve Byrne's face is better than Dawn's ass.

[Jacob]

Stand up, turn around and bend over.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, you like that, don't you, Jacob?

[Bobby Kelly]

I mean, this guy's fucking nut bag in those fucking girl pants is crazy.

[Big J. Okerson]

So funny and it's so funny nobody else around him.

[Bobby Kelly]

Shoes. Goody good, goody good. Worked out. No excuses. I think Christine flicks bean to this house in her algorithm.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, how do you find this?

[Christine]

I don't know why she loves algorithm.

[Bobby Kelly]

This is exactly, by the way, this is what her old gay best friend looks like now. And she probably looks, she kind of look. And she had a crush on him when they were younger. Since Christine's flicking bean like. But my investigative skills are unbelievable, Jay.

[Christine]

I'm not this guy.

[Bobby Kelly]

Show up, show the video, show the picture. Your friend, your gay friend.

[Big J. Okerson]

She'S not flickering, she's flicking. Her being the hocus pocus.

[Bobby Kelly]

She flicks bean to this.

[Big J. Okerson]

You think she likes this?

[Bobby Kelly]

And a lady who exercises with a bald head who calls herself a guy.

[Big J. Okerson]

Girl, I'm telling you right now, Christine and Don, when we're gone, when we die, which we will die soon, they're both becoming lesbians.

[Bobby Kelly]

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[Commercial Voice]

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[Bobby Kelly]

Can you use it in a sentence?

[Commercial Voice]

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[Big J. Okerson]

Are you holding back on travel plans this holiday break because you're afraid of a language gap? Well, no need to mind the gap if you have Babel. I use Babel all the time. I just went to Cuba. It was so frustrating and not be able to ask for certain things. You know what? I just turned on my Babbel app. All of a sudden I was speaking sentences saying good afternoon. I got to go in and say por favor queso which means please cheese. This app was amazing because it teaches you in a fun, relatable way that all of a sudden you just know words and they're in your lexicon. I'm learning Italian with my son. I put my whole family on Babbel right now with a quick 10 minute lesson handcrafted by over 200 language experts. B get you talking in a new language just three weeks and with the advanced speech recognition by babbel it's like having a personal language tutor in your pocket helping you pronunciate whenever you open your mouth. I got Babbel. I hopefully know Spanish and Italian by the end of the year and I already know a bunch of words. I know a couple swears too. Not on there from the guy I met in Cuba. Here's a special holiday deal for our listeners right now. Get up to 60% off your Babbel subscription but only for the bonfire with big J ogresson and Robert kelly. [e-mail] Bonfire get up to 60% off.babel.com Bonfire spelled B A B E L.com Bonfire rules and restrictions may apply. Tiamo. Gracias. No, you don't think Christine's. Dawn's definitely dying.

[Bobby Kelly]

I think Christine's going asexual. I don't know if she's going to do either thing.

[Big J. Okerson]

I think Don's going to try to get Christine. I think Don's going to come over with a fucking quiche.

[Bobby Kelly]

That's very, very.

[Big J. Okerson]

Dog's going to be friendly, by the way.

[Bobby Kelly]

Look, this is Christine's what? Crush. That's her gay friend crush.

[Big J. Okerson]

How did you go from Jay to that, the other one? That's like the exact opposite sides of the spectrum.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, well, he's not fucking her. He's not fucking her.

[Big J. Okerson]

Did he ever try to fuck you?

[Christine]

No, no. He's the friend whose house I used to sleep at all the time. Because he was so obviously gay. Like, wasn't it?

[Bobby Kelly]

He was gonna. She was gonna try to her till he found out she was a girl.

[Big J. Okerson]

Did he. Did he talk gay? Yeah, he had the gay accent. Yeah. Christine, I love pussy.

[Bobby Kelly]

Just not yours.

[Big J. Okerson]

Children.

[Bobby Kelly]

Just not yours.

[Big J. Okerson]

So when you were a kid, was he in that shape? No, he's just a little. No, no, no.

[Christine]

This is recent.

[Big J. Okerson]

So you knew him as a little boy?

[Bobby Kelly]

She liked it when he was fat like me. My new book, Everybody Fat Like Me.

[Christine]

He was my roommate when I first moved to the city.

[Big J. Okerson]

It's an animated book. Little Fat cow.

[Bobby Kelly]

Little fat Cow.

[Jacob]

Is this the guy that had gay rabbis come over?

[Christine]

No, but he's brought that guy to Christmas.

[Big J. Okerson]

Really?

[Christine]

It was his friend that used to give. He was like a big fat guy and he would give the gay naked massages to the Hasidics. Not exclusively to Hasidics, but they were part of his clientele.

[Big J. Okerson]

So Hasidics, the acidic guys were gay?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. We let him do it because, like, they get to suck baby birds. You know what I mean? You gotta suck the blood out of the baby birds.

[Big J. Okerson]

So he would. He would jerk these guys. Like, he would suck. These guys just give gay.

[Christine]

Naked massage.

[Bobby Kelly]

Naked massage on a guy.

[Big J. Okerson]

So he didn't touch that.

[Bobby Kelly]

Because my masseuse was a gay man. He goes, was it gay? No.

[Christine]

Maybe. He must have jerked him off. That must have been part of the thing.

[Big J. Okerson]

That would be the gay part. If you get in a massage by a guy, it's not gay.

[Jacob]

I'm not saying if.

[Christine]

He's naked, man.

[Big J. Okerson]

Oh, he's naked. Yeah, that's gay.

[Bobby Kelly]

No. Why? We've all done that, right?

[Big J. Okerson]

Bobby, I just want to say. So if a guy's naked and giving you a massage, that's gay?

[Christine]

I think if you're a man getting massaged by a naked man, it's questionable.

[Big J. Okerson]

Okay, let me ask you a questionable?

[Christine]

I don't know if my straight father would do that. What have you levels of straight?

[Bobby Kelly]

Your father asked me to leave when I came in naked and asked him if he wanted to rub down. Hey, John, what if. What if you didn't know Christine and your wife were out for the evening? You seemed a little tense earlier when we were talking out there.

[Big J. Okerson]

What if. What if you didn't know the guy was gay?

[Christine]

You're still laying in a naked man.

[Bobby Kelly]

Massage when you go, why are you naked for this? And he goes, well, I do it Reiki style. I have to get my bird on your back.

[Big J. Okerson]

What if he used his penis to massage your lower back? I mean, is that gay?

[Christine]

That's pretty gay, Bobby.

[Bobby Kelly]

Okay, what if he finished in you gay?

[Jacob]

What if you're a rabbi from Brooklyn that shouldn't be caught dead doing this?

[Christine]

No. Those Hasidic guys, though, there, you saw them at the swingers thing. They go to the Cellar. The naked massages, they're always out around.

[Bobby Kelly]

No.

[Big J. Okerson]

Well, because they can't. You know what I mean?

[Christine]

They can't because the women aren't allowed to leave the house.

[Big J. Okerson]

Well, they're not supposed to.

[Jacob]

Naked massages?

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, they're not supposed to be gay. That's like the black guys in Atlanta. They're not supposed to be gay.

[Christine]

They're not supposed to be at swingers clubs with prostitutes either.

[Big J. Okerson]

Why? Why do you hold them to a higher standard?

[Bobby Kelly]

Because they smell bad and have weird.

[Big J. Okerson]

Hair and hats that take over the overhead.

[Bobby Kelly]

The fucking airplane, ruin everything and weird things. And they hate all of us.

[Big J. Okerson]

And they're gonna rock back and forth reading a book.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J. Okerson]

Freak everybody out.

[Bobby Kelly]

They have to do a terrifying prayer and put on some weird thing on their head.

[Jacob]

Yeah.

[Big J. Okerson]

They gotta wrap their arm up in a tourniquet.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. Hey, do you mind if I put this old timey camera on my head?

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, they put the GoPro on their heads.

[Bobby Kelly]

The. Is that.

[Big J. Okerson]

What is that?

[Bobby Kelly]

Myself like, sir, we're in an airport. Chilies, you're freaking people out.

[Big J. Okerson]

Why are they. What is the thing that they wrap around their arm and then their head and it looks like a GoPro.

[Christine]

Man, I feel like you guys should join sniffies on your phone so we can get a real feel for how this site Works.

[Big J. Okerson]

Which one of us is going to do it?

[Bobby Kelly]

A real feel.

[Big J. Okerson]

Which one's gonna do it? You? We gotta. I don't. I can't do it. I can't do it because what if. What if Max uses my phone one day in Sniffies?

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, man, that would make me so.

[Christine]

He'd be heartbroken.

[Big J. Okerson]

No, you're heartbroken. And don't be like, I knew it.

[Christine]

My dad's a slut.

[Bobby Kelly]

Max is. If Max is awesome in the way I think he is, he would start responding to things as you. Well, I'm actually. I'm actually going to be in Beacon, New York. So if you just want to come by, tell him you're a friend of mine, go in the green room and just wait with your. Out. But also see if you could squeeze your legs together so I can. You're dicking balls coming through your legs.

[Big J. Okerson]

I'm doing a pump and dump at Louis CK Friday night in New York.

[Bobby Kelly]

Pump and dump. Is that Danny Braff?

[Christine]

Is that a pump and dump? Like a gang bang where everybody.

[Big J. Okerson]

Oh, fucking leave a pump and dump.

[Christine]

No, I know that, but it seems.

[Big J. Okerson]

Like a pump and dump is. And I just found this out last week, a pump and dump is when you. I say, as a gay man, I want to get fucked by a lot of guys. Tonight I'm doing a pump and dump at my apartment. Here's the address, here's the time, and make a cue. And you guys show up on your time. So you, you know, Jay, you would come at 7, you'd come at 7:30, you come at 8, Lou. DJ Lou, you'd come at 8:30, and black Lou, you come last.

[Bobby Kelly]

You were going to be late anyway. It would have thrown the whole schedule off.

[Christine]

A scheduled anonymous gang bang.

[Bobby Kelly]

Okay, well, I'll tell you what, that's surprising. That was. Pump and dump is also just a basic term of like, you somebody, and.

[Big J. Okerson]

That'S what they do.

[Bobby Kelly]

Never saw him again. No, but I didn't know that was like. So you would say that if you brought a. If like a guy said he brought a chick home from a club one night, like dancing goes. Yeah, just a pump and dump. We fucked. That was it.

[Big J. Okerson]

No, the pump and dump. For this is when the gay gang bang. You schedule train.

[Bobby Kelly]

1.

[Big J. Okerson]

One guy wants to get fucked by a lot of dudes, and they all just come one day. Train, and they just pump, dump and leave. There's no exchange. There's no, hey, you come, you fuck, you go. Guy just wants a lot of ding, ding. Okay, yeah. Wants a lot of. I think there was one the guy was talking about was 75 people.

[Bobby Kelly]

Why can't I see there? Oh, look. Coachella presented by Snippies. Let's see who's performing. Friday it's Come, come, come, come, come, come, come.

[Big J. Okerson]

Saturday.

[Bobby Kelly]

Come, come, come, come. Well, Saturday you think that's going to be the big night, but it's actually a come headlining that one. And then the support act actually is better that week where they got. Come, come, come, come, come. And then my eyes are getting bad. I can't see the little ones there. I come, come, come. And then Sunday's the big dogs come. And then a bunch of cums after that. And it's returning to the desert, everybody.

[Big J. Okerson]

So what's this slogan?

[Bobby Kelly]

Much.

[Big J. Okerson]

So much cum.

[Bobby Kelly]

So much that way.

[Big J. Okerson]

You should get that. You should get that T shirt.

[Bobby Kelly]

I really. Come, come, come, come, come.

[Big J. Okerson]

I'm so sad that fistfest got canceled this year. Oh yeah. I was gonna send Danny and Joe Russell down.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh yeah.

[Big J. Okerson]

To go. I wanted to do a comedy show at Fist Fest.

[Bobby Kelly]

Why not?

[Big J. Okerson]

That would be great.

[Bobby Kelly]

We should. We should start promoting doing bonfire stand up comedy shows at strange events.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, come. We could do come Fest. Yeah, we do fist fest.

[Bobby Kelly]

Fist.

[Big J. Okerson]

We should do a stand up comedy at a pump and dump.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh yeah.

[Big J. Okerson]

While you're waiting in line.

[Bobby Kelly]

That's right. Or just a live broadcast from a pump and dump. We talked to the guy in between. He goes, now your next person coming. He goes, yeah, he was supposed to be here at 11, but it's 11:10, so I don't know, it's going to be in traffic or something. But I'm ready. But I think I feel my B hole starting to shrink back down the normal size.

[Big J. Okerson]

Oh.

[Bobby Kelly]

What. What's your problem here?

[Big J. Okerson]

Oh, God. That looks like a.

[Bobby Kelly]

Does he have a bunch of beepers around his asshole? It to vibrate the bit. Christine, zoom in on his. Something's wrong with it.

[Big J. Okerson]

What kind of sneakers are those? I like those.

[Christine]

It's not a good zoom.

[Big J. Okerson]

Why is he wearing sneakers with his.

[Bobby Kelly]

Those are vias.

[Big J. Okerson]

Do you just come in from a jog? Oh, God damn it.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, I guess we're never gonna see that.

[Big J. Okerson]

Gone.

[Bobby Kelly]

Awesome.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah.

[Christine]

Where'd it go?

[Bobby Kelly]

Well, you got rid of it. It's not there. I don't know what happened.

[Big J. Okerson]

Did you. Did you see the. This weekend.

[Bobby Kelly]

What's that?

[Big J. Okerson]

All the. Dude, they had car sized drones flying over New Jersey.

[Bobby Kelly]

Nice.

[Big J. Okerson]

Like the size of cars.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J. Okerson]

Flying over New Jersey. My friend actually saw one over who was. They don't know. They don't know. I mean, we're talking, we're not talking regular drones. We're talking the size of cars flying over New Jersey all weekend long. Nobody knows who they, whose they were, what they were, what they were doing. And they've never seen drones this size flying over people's houses.

[Bobby Kelly]

Well, the Joe Rogan experienced companion here has some scientific news.

[Big J. Okerson]

Buddy, this was on the news. The governor actually spoke out about it today.

[Christine]

Yeah, they said they were seeing him from like 8 to 11pm I didn't know. They didn't know what they were.

[Big J. Okerson]

They have no idea who they were, what they were. But the size of them was freaking people out because it wasn't regular like DJI drones. These things were like the size of cars, right? Like they were huge. And they weren't making any noise like your regular drum. They're pretty loud. These were just flying over people's houses.

[Bobby Kelly]

Some witnesses estimate them to be the size of small cars or SUVs. But that's also my friend.

[Big J. Okerson]

My friend saw one.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, you're hysterical.

[Big J. Okerson]

No, no, I'm telling you, my friend Joe.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, Wacky Joe. You call Big shoulders behind his back. You always call me go. Oh, shithead. Joe always thinks everything's the size of a car.

[Big J. Okerson]

First of all, he's a big fan of the show. Listens every day. Yeah, he's. No, he saw.

[Bobby Kelly]

Holy shit. That's the size of a car. Bobby, you don't eat that burger. That thing's the size of a car, man.

[Big J. Okerson]

Buddy, this is crazy. And this all goes back to when I saw the thing on the highway going home, right where you guys were like, that was a bird.

[Bobby Kelly]

And now you said it was a spaceship.

[Big J. Okerson]

Well, I mean, it could have been a fucking car drone, of course, but the fact that there's. First of all, to fly a drone in New York, it has to be under a certain amount of weight for it to be legal or you have to have a license to fly a drone. You can't just fly like even the movie drones that they use for the cameras, they're pretty big, but they're not the size of cars, right? You need to be licensed, you have to go through the. You have to get a certificate, all this shit. These people are flying car sized drones over New Jersey at night, over people's houses. Now the problem with this is if the battery died. What are you laughing at?

[Bobby Kelly]

The music.

[Big J. Okerson]

Oh, sorry, I thought you were laughing at my.

[Bobby Kelly]

Bobby, while you're panicking about this Drone invasion that's coming our way. We still have to do a comedy show. What the are you laughing at over there? You think it's funny when the car drones come?

[Big J. Okerson]

Because I'm a little insecure bringing this up because I got made fun of last time I brought up the thing I saw on the highway.

[Bobby Kelly]

Bobby, you said I saw a spaceship.

[Big J. Okerson]

I saw a ufo, not a spaceship.

[Bobby Kelly]

You didn't say it was a car sized drone.

[Big J. Okerson]

I said ufo, which is an unidentified flying object.

[Bobby Kelly]

You thought there was a person with long green fingers inside that pushing buttons. And then he goes, he goes. He saw us.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, well, who's gonna fly the thing, huh? Regular Joe?

[Bobby Kelly]

No, kid, just be regular old Joe. Wacky ass Joe.

[Big J. Okerson]

Listen what I'm saying.

[Jacob]

You sent a video today of two girls thinking there was a ufo. Was clearly a plane with plane lights and a plane engine.

[Big J. Okerson]

That is not true.

[Jacob]

Flying over them.

[Big J. Okerson]

That is not true. 100% as 100 knot percent.

[Bobby Kelly]

Wait a second. There's something on the side of that spaceship United. Oh my God. They're uniting.

[Jacob]

Had plane lights on.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's a united force from another country. It was coming to us.

[Jacob]

Okay.

[Bobby Kelly]

They seem like they're humanoids through the windows. Hello.

[Jacob]

All right, let everyone else be the judge. Let's hear this.

[Big J. Okerson]

It was a drones over New Jersey this weekend.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's all over the Jersey.

[Big J. Okerson]

Somebody call in Hussara drone.

[Jacob]

Is this the video you sent this morning?

[Bobby Kelly]

Drones over.

[Big J. Okerson]

I sent over a couple videos over the weekend of the drones and the governor was talking about the drones this weekend.

[Jacob]

This is this warrant. Drones? This was just a plane.

[Big J. Okerson]

You don't know that they were. Yes, I do know that. You're always against me, Jacob.

[Jacob]

Bobby, those weren't. It was a plane.

[Big J. Okerson]

You're a cowboy till it's time to be a cowboy.

[Jacob]

Plane flew over them and they didn't know that. They didn't know what it was.

[Big J. Okerson]

I'm telling you what.

[Bobby Kelly]

Drones over Jersey. Don't pull your thing out unless you got your dang out. Drones over Jersey.

[Jacob]

Can you play the video you sent today?

[Bobby Kelly]

Hang on, Jacob. This is happening first. What's that? Damn it. Where's the chorus? Oh, look at that.

[Big J. Okerson]

Look at that thing.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, look at those things go. That's the size of a car. Christine, play that. Damn. This is a long verse.

[Big J. Okerson]

Look at these. Look at them.

[Bobby Kelly]

This joke ended five minutes ago.

[Big J. Okerson]

1.

[Bobby Kelly]

Let's do your thing.

[Big J. Okerson]

1, 2.

[Bobby Kelly]

Drones over Jersey.

[Big J. Okerson]

4.

[Bobby Kelly]

Don't pull your thang out unless you pull your thang out.

[Big J. Okerson]

Look at the size of these things.

[Bobby Kelly]

Drones over Jersey. Don't pull your thing out unless you pull your thing out. Drones over Jersey.

[Big J. Okerson]

These things are huge.

[Jacob]

But we agree they're just drones.

[Big J. Okerson]

They're drones.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, but that's a plane.

[Big J. Okerson]

That's not a plane. That was a drone.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, this here is a plane.

[Big J. Okerson]

That was a drone.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, that's it.

[Big J. Okerson]

No, that's a drone, Jay. Okay, that is a fucking huge drone.

[Bobby Kelly]

No problem.

[Big J. Okerson]

They're flying all over Jersey. Not even like high. They're flying like, you know, maybe a couple hundred feet off the ground or off above the buildings.

[Bobby Kelly]

Cops looking for problems.

[Christine]

Who the fuck they are.

[Big J. Okerson]

That's the problem is nobody knows who's flying car sized drones over fucking like people. Because if the battery dies, that thing falls out of the sky. Someone could die. You know what I mean? Governor Murphy's all over it.

[Bobby Kelly]

Don't worry.

[Big J. Okerson]

What is he saying?

[Bobby Kelly]

Don't pull your thing unless you pull your thing. Drones over Jersey.

[Big J. Okerson]

I sent you. I sent you.

[Bobby Kelly]

Pull your thing out. Drones over Jersey. Don't pull your thing out unless you pull your thing out. Drones over Jersey.

[Big J. Okerson]

I wish people could see you because your dance moves.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'm throwing it down.

[Big J. Okerson]

Dude, I sent you the thing with the governor on the. In the. In the chat. He. He came out. Look, if the governor doesn't know who the it is, what's going on? That's crazy.

[Bobby Kelly]

Is our governor stupid?

[Big J. Okerson]

No, he's not stupid.

[Bobby Kelly]

Do we like him?

[Big J. Okerson]

I love him.

[Bobby Kelly]

Why?

[Big J. Okerson]

He got us through Covid. He seems to be fair woke loose. I don't have a lot of money, so taxes don't bother me.

[Bobby Kelly]

Write him a letter.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, Irish. Whatever, Bob. How do you just not. You don't even.

[Bobby Kelly]

Twins should be tax exempt.

[Big J. Okerson]

If you got a juicy ass, you should pay less for the train. You don't know shit about Jersey.

[Bobby Kelly]

Shut up. Juicy asses. I know that.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, you should be on butts.

[Bobby Kelly]

Look at those asses on smushies over there. And Blue was looking over his shoulder like this. He was going like. Yeah, whatever, dude.

[Big J. Okerson]

Whatever.

[Bobby Kelly]

Whatever, dude. You think that's a thumper? That.

[Big J. Okerson]

Dude, I walk to the bus every day. You want to see a thumper?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, dude. This show goes to pieces, Lou, you don't have to worry about that. Dude. You start going prone, bone on the.

[Big J. Okerson]

Only fans, you go sniffies. Buddy, you're making a lot of money.

[Bobby Kelly]

Just let them just open your butt cheeks enough so they can see your. Then the seam that goes down to your ball bag.

[Big J. Okerson]

No, you're Gay. Get away from me.

[Bobby Kelly]

Well, don't pull your thing out unless you pull your thing out.

[Big J. Okerson]

I mean, it's pretty. You're moving to Jersey.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J. Okerson]

And imagine being out in your backyard and all of a sudden a car, drone size of a car, flies over here.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'm gonna do. I'm gonna do the acceptance of when they accept. I'm just going to ascend. I'm going to accept complete.

[Big J. Okerson]

Now somebody.

[Bobby Kelly]

What do they call it? They take you away? Abduction. I'm going to accept abduction. I'll put my arms out to the side.

[Big J. Okerson]

They can't abduct you. It's a drone.

[Bobby Kelly]

And I'll be like, christine, stop trying to take my sneakers off and selling them before I get pulled up.

[Big J. Okerson]

Well, here's it. Somebody actually pointed one of those laser things to one of the drones and the drone took off.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, it didn't.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, it did.

[Bobby Kelly]

In some kind of crazy direction or something.

[Big J. Okerson]

No, it didn't.

[Bobby Kelly]

Impossible. It's just a drone.

[Big J. Okerson]

It didn't. No, it didn't do any crazy moves or anything like that. But we've been spotted. I mean, dude, to have more than one huge drone fly up is crazy.

[Bobby Kelly]

So you think they're scouting for something bigger? Like some Cloverfield shit is coming?

[Big J. Okerson]

I don't know, dude. I mean, look, Amazon.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, you do know. You should have listened to what I said first. I don't think it's probably. I don't believe you think it might be a Cloverfield monster. I don't think that's what you think.

[Big J. Okerson]

You don't know.

[Bobby Kelly]

Okay, in fairness, I don't know. We could have been just using those to awaken a Cloverfield monster.

[Big J. Okerson]

I'm just saying.

[Bobby Kelly]

And then this goddamn company stirred shit up.

[Big J. Okerson]

Hey, man, you don't know corporations, dude. Look, a year ago you thought it was crazy for seeing something over the Hudson. Now there's drones everywhere over Jersey.

[Bobby Kelly]

I didn't think it was crazy that you saw something over the Hudson. I'm saying for you to think that it was a spaceship. You are now saying that you came in with, like, rational explanations right away, like, it's probably a drone or something. But it was pretty wacky seeing it over there. You were like, no, they were commute. They heard me talking. They are trying to communicate with me.

[Big J. Okerson]

You're the same. You're the people. You're the people. You're the people that don't believe in things. You have no belief.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yes.

[Big J. Okerson]

Okay. And when the stuff happens, right? When things go down, you're going to be the one stuck in the city with nowhere to go. I'm going to be the one prepared, ready to go. Because I saw this shit coming.

[Bobby Kelly]

Did you see how. What a boner Rogan was getting when like Trump, if Trump was aware of little green men sitting in a tube somewhere that we found years ago or some. The way he said it, he goes, I'm going to disclose the alien stuff. You know, it's time. It's time. And he's like, you're going to say the thing goes, yeah, I'm going to disclose it. Do you think he's going to be telling us, guys, guess what? There's whole other species on other planets we've been communicating with for years. I didn't tell you for the last eight years, but I'm going to bring it up. It's. It's. Come on.

[Big J. Okerson]

I. Well, look, the alien.

[Bobby Kelly]

You're waiting for nothing.

[Big J. Okerson]

The alien thing, I think they definitely have ships.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, drones.

[Big J. Okerson]

No, they probably have cars. I'm telling you, they probably have some type of ship somewhere. Remember the guy who Rogan had on? I forget his name. Liar.

[Bobby Kelly]

Mcallister.

[Big J. Okerson]

So you're telling me right now liar.

[Bobby Kelly]

MC pissed at his old job.

[Big J. Okerson]

You're telling me.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's always what it is. The CIA fired me. So I'm telling. Telling you there's aliens.

[Big J. Okerson]

Everybody in this room right now. You guys don't believe in aliens? You don't believe that we, the government has a ship or something, it landed and we have it. Do you believe that? I believe.

[Bobby Kelly]

I completely believe in aliens.

[Big J. Okerson]

Thank you.

[Bobby Kelly]

But I do believe that was like an Amazon test for future deliveries.

[Big J. Okerson]

It might be because Amazon is testing out, but they would have to let people know. You'd have to let the FAA know, you'd have to let the airports know. You can't just fly planes. I mean, there's small planes over Teterboro that you need to let other people know. Okay, we're going to test these drones out. So don't have planes in this area.

[Bobby Kelly]

He believes in aliens. He believes the world's flat. He believes you could fuck a baby and cure aids.

[Big J. Okerson]

Can you.

[Jacob]

I don't understand. What do you think?

[Big J. Okerson]

What if that was the cure?

[Bobby Kelly]

That's what. That's why. That's what happens in Africa. It's crazy.

[Big J. Okerson]

What's that?

[Jacob]

But you're going to. Two topics. Does the drones and the UFOs. You're not saying they're UFO drones?

[Big J. Okerson]

No, I'm not saying the UFO drones. I'm saying that he brought up the fact that I brought up there might be a UFO that I saw last year. And he's saying it's crazy. There's no UFOs. And Trump said he was gonna reveal all the UFO stuff when he gets into office. And Rogan was all whipped up about it. There has to be something. We can't go from thousands of years of the same technology and then the last 80 years we have fucking computers and phones and all this crazy cars that drive themselves that quickly. It's not like we figured it out that fast. Something had to.

[Jacob]

124 years.

[Big J. Okerson]

What we have what, electric cars?

[Jacob]

Actually.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, I know they had an electric car back in the day. I'm just saying the technology we have in general, the AI on my phone that I can go into my phone now, calculators and type in encyclopedia. But we had books for years and now all of a sudden we have computers.

[Bobby Kelly]

They kind of said, though. That is always how it works. So it goes like. It's like a heavy spurt of things and then it.

[Big J. Okerson]

Who said.

[Bobby Kelly]

Trickles off for a while.

[Big J. Okerson]

Who's they?

[Christine]

The people, you fucking asshole.

[Big J. Okerson]

This is why we suck as humans. You don't even know what you tell. You just said that.

[Bobby Kelly]

You might find my iPhone's alien technology. Bobby, I like what you think is like, you're willing to accept that it's drones, but you think the person holding the remote control has big long alien figures.

[Big J. Okerson]

That's not what I'm saying.

[Bobby Kelly]

Like when you find who's controlling this drone, it's like somebody with fly eyes on a giant gray head.

[Big J. Okerson]

That is not what I'm saying.

[Justin Silver]

Oops.

[Bobby Kelly]

I got this at Brookstone.

[Big J. Okerson]

That is not what I'm not.

[Bobby Kelly]

I've got this and the Gronk neck massager.

[Big J. Okerson]

What if that is it, though?

[Bobby Kelly]

Bleak. Bleak. Blonk. Bl.

[Big J. Okerson]

What if it was aliens controlling. That's their toys.

[Bobby Kelly]

Like giant. Three giant fingers. The war of the worlds hand comes over and just playing with the joystick.

[Big J. Okerson]

Those are just little kid aliens. And it's their Christmases before our Christmas.

[Bobby Kelly]

Let's go over the beach and look at Hooters.

[Big J. Okerson]

An official aircraft approached and on set one night, the lights on the drones went dark.

[Christine]

And this is the governor talking. I just have a cute.

[Big J. Okerson]

What is. Okay, let's hear what the governor has to say.

[Bobby Kelly]

Nine additional sightings were reported, including 20 in Hunterton County. I was on with the White House and Homeland Security leadership. Literally at the bottom. Is this going to be my governor?

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, that's your governor?

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, my God, dude. Why not? Did they wake him up after time went on last night?

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah. Why is he wearing my aunt's glasses?

[Bobby Kelly]

He showed up from last night's party.

[Big J. Okerson]

He really just got those at CVS on the way to this fucking press conference.

[Bobby Kelly]

He's like, tomorrow morning I'm gonna get on there. They go, it is morning. He goes, look at that. It is.

[Big J. Okerson]

That's why Lou legs are there. He's all beat up from working so hard.

[Bobby Kelly]

Is that what it is?

[Big J. Okerson]

That's the way Lou would dress if he was the governor.

[Bobby Kelly]

Now, if anybody have to go judge this shitty pumpkin coloring contest at this stupid school.

[Big J. Okerson]

All right, go ahead.

[Bobby Kelly]

Pretty much all day. I'm hoping we'll get answers sooner than later. The Morris county mayors are asking for a full investigation to determine their origin purpose if they are in compliance with. Go back a little bit, Christine. Actually go back to the governor. Just get back to him right there. Don't have to play it, but I will just say, Christine, do me a favor. Go through those books that are that school's library right there. When we get to Jersey, I want to make a real stink about they still allow these books for some reason. Let's find problems with these books.

[Big J. Okerson]

The night.

[Bobby Kelly]

The Night war. I keep seeing that.

[Big J. Okerson]

That's funny.

[Bobby Kelly]

Let's find out now. He goes, ah, there's misgendering in this book. And then Christine, let's really become like town problems. I want to have book burnings. I want to be very involved with how the schools are run. With no children in school, you have.

[Big J. Okerson]

To have your big dog on, like a little pouch in front, like you carry it. Yes, like a baby.

[Bobby Kelly]

A full size dog. So you have 58 pounds of dogs hanging from my chest. And I'll go, I'll go. She's sweet. She's being weird because she knows you're uncomfortable. Now, this is Christine, everybody. She's about to dominate your school system's libraries with. With heavy censorship.

[Christine]

I'm going to lead the pta.

[Big J. Okerson]

She comes in dressed like a witch.

[Bobby Kelly]

Too many white kids in this class.

[Big J. Okerson]

All right, go ahead.

[Bobby Kelly]

I mean, this is pretty much all day. I'm hoping he doesn't look okay. Answers sooner than later. The Morris county mayors are asking investigations if they are in compliance with regulations. Any scandals ever. Clear communication to local. Christine, look up governor of. What's his name?

[Big J. Okerson]

Murphy. Governor of.

[Bobby Kelly]

Governor Murphy scandal.

[Big J. Okerson]

No way.

[Bobby Kelly]

You want there to be no way, but it's true.

[Big J. Okerson]

Well, I don't care. I'm not moving.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, not you.

[Big J. Okerson]

I'm best Chester Black.

[Bobby Kelly]

Lou.

[Big J. Okerson]

That's where I think you should move. But you moved to New York.

[Bobby Kelly]

You're in Canada. Came to your house. It was a different climate up there.

[Big J. Okerson]

It's Westchester.

[Bobby Kelly]

My ears popped.

[Big J. Okerson]

Your ears popped?

[Justin Silver]

Yeah.

[Big J. Okerson]

Jumping out of the city.

[Bobby Kelly]

I had to put the emergency brake on every time I was at a stop sign because everything was 95 degrees straight up. If Max goes outside of your house and jumps on a sled, he's going to land on the west side Highway. He won't stop to the west side Highway. It's straight down.

[Big J. Okerson]

Are you guys going to come back up?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big J. Okerson]

Okay, good. It's not that far.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's your home.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, but it's not that far.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, no. But I'm saying. But it is a funny thing to be like. You ever going to come up again? Yeah. It wasn't. Yeah. You do it every day. Ah, here we go. New Jersey Governor Phil Murphy accused of using $12,000 in taxpayer money for food and drinks at MetLife Stadium and expensive pens. This piece of shit.

[Big J. Okerson]

What a piece of garbage. That's only $2,000 more than eight Amy gave to Val.

[Bobby Kelly]

What a pos.

[Big J. Okerson]

Wow.

[Jacob]

Ah, that's nothing.

[Bobby Kelly]

What? Nothing? That's not nothing at all.

[Big J. Okerson]

This is his second term. You probably won't have to see him.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, thank God. Oh, is he. Is he out early in the year? I think he lost or something.

[Big J. Okerson]

Is he a Democrat? I think he can only go two terms, right? Yeah, two terms. Only two terms. Well, Bloomberg made it three terms. He changed the rules while he was here.

[Bobby Kelly]

He was the mayor.

[Big J. Okerson]

He was. He was the mayor. Yeah. He changed. He's the only one that change. It supposed to be two terms for everybody, but he changed it when he was the mayor. But I don't think he can change it.

[Bobby Kelly]

Well, so. So governors, too. Governor, See who's going to be the new governor. We did drive through the area we're going to be, though, and I will say it is. It was. There was signs for both parties. But just living in a place where people put their political signs on the lawn at all is definitely like, yeesh.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, I know.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeesh.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, we have. We have a person around the house. I love America. I just hate Trump. It's like, all right, dude, relax.

[Bobby Kelly]

We went to a Mexican restaurant in the area.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

For. That was what we did on my birthday. And there was in there. I said, oh, boy. I go, these are. It was white people with money. It seemed. Not like they Were dressed in their money at all. But like it was this confidence. There was at this Mexican restaurant, they have like a side room and I guess there was like a wedding happening in there.

[Christine]

Yeah, yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

Or something. A real Mexican wedding happening in this room.

[Big J. Okerson]

A lot of color.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yes. And what they had going on outside. One of the things they were. I don't know why what this means or what. Maybe it's for the kids. But they had a guy in a suit that looked like almost the. The football robot, the. The NFL and Fox robot. I mean it was this huge. This guy was like 8ft tall at least. Any and his whole thing like lit up or something. And then these nosy, just 50 something, 60 something, year old white people came up and they go, oh God, what is this about? Like, what's the meaning of the not shitty? Like the drunken. Like Woolworth is going to dominate this situation. And then like they're like, oh, come on. Without asking anything. He's like, take pictures of us with this thing and the guy and the old man, like. And then he goes, nah, bad picture. Come on, guy. We're going for one more. We're just like the. Oh, I hate. I was like, I hated those people.

[Big J. Okerson]

Welcome to Jersey.

[Bobby Kelly]

Just the welcome to Jersey.

[Big J. Okerson]

That was Jersey.

[Christine]

That's exactly what everybody in New Jersey's like.

[Big J. Okerson]

That's Jersey, dude. Yeah. A lot of moocs. That's Jersey. I love it.

[Christine]

That's why rest of the country.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, dude. Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

I don't know if it's Jersey. That's the situation of Jersey, but that was just those people. Those people were. I was like, oh, I would not like these people.

[Christine]

Long island too.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, Long Island. Jersey. Yeah, dude. Your Jersey.

[Bobby Kelly]

Well, it's. I think it's. I think it's any old people with money. The super confidence.

[Big J. Okerson]

That's a fucking Jersey, dude. Fucking. Come here. Over here.

[Christine]

I'm trying to find.

[Big J. Okerson]

Let's take a picture with this.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. That is sort of basically what it was.

[Christine]

Yeah. And then the guy. I kept looking in the room and at one point the guy was in this suit in the center of a circle. And I thought everybody had pool noodle pool noodles, but they had like long balloons and they were just dancing around him in a circle. It was very bizarre.

[Bobby Kelly]

Christine was staring in the window in the glass doors of this wedding like a. Like it was a Mexican zoo. I was like, stop doing that. You're being these. You're being these people. What's this? What's the outfit? Oh, take pictures with us.

[Big J. Okerson]

A Mexican zoo.

[Christine]

And then there were like two girls in white dresses that they were like. I thought was. I didn't know if it was quincera or a wedding. It was a wedding, but there were two young girls in white dresses with tiaras that they were like presenting. I don't know if it was a debutant thing or maybe there were two weddings.

[Big J. Okerson]

Maybe the brides, maybe the Mexican people don't make their brides. Kids made with shitty colored dresses like you. Our people do.

[Bobby Kelly]

Jersey.

[Big J. Okerson]

There you go. You're in.

[Bobby Kelly]

What part of Jersey are they from?

[Big J. Okerson]

You know, sponge, obese, Saraville. Down the shore. Down the shore. Do you know in Jersey it's illegal to pump your own gas?

[Bobby Kelly]

I do know that.

[Big J. Okerson]

You don't pump, which I love.

[Bobby Kelly]

We know. I lived in Jersey for many years.

[Big J. Okerson]

I didn't know that when.

[Bobby Kelly]

South Jersey, that's where we moved out of food. Jersey.

[Big J. Okerson]

I love. I love.

[Bobby Kelly]

But it's just the outside. It's just the outside of Philly. And then this is New York.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, that's more Philly. Jersey's a different animal.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, Jersey. North Jersey is much more New York and South Jersey is a different.

[Big J. Okerson]

It's a. It's more like Long Island. Long island and Jersey are very similar suburbs.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Big J. Okerson]

Westchester. Different.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's not though.

[Big J. Okerson]

It's different.

[Christine]

You're like Connecticut. It's very WASPy and stuffy.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah. Fucking stuff up. Yeah.

[Christine]

This is more like ethnic. Like the Italians.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah. Mine is rich people. Ryan Reynolds.

[Christine]

Yeah.

[Big J. Okerson]

Rich whites. Martha. A lot of earth tones.

[Christine]

All the Connecticut whites.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, I like the little earth tones. Greens. Forest green.

[Christine]

Quilted jacket.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah, I have one. Me and Dawn. Oh, Don totally assimilated. She had a. She had a long. She had a quilted long vest. She came out the other day. I'm like, what are you. The. Are you wearing? She had a quilted long vest and her hair was done like a lion's mane.

[Christine]

That's very Martha Stewart.

[Big J. Okerson]

Oh, yeah. Oh, she's trying to fucking sell her plate somewhere. She's all in. Up in Westchester, man.

[Bobby Kelly]

We.

[Big J. Okerson]

She's all tan clothes. Gotta take a break.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, Dawn's going full woods.

[Big J. Okerson]

She's going full woodsy. She's going full Connecticut WASPy.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, nice. Oh, yeah, dude, you might. She might end up being with Christine.

[Big J. Okerson]

I hope so.

[Bobby Kelly]

Bobby Kelly.

[Big J. Okerson]

That'd be my dream. If they. They wind up to not. Not lesbian out, but just live together.

[Bobby Kelly]

Well, if you want to give dawn room to breathe so she can explore all of her curiosities you can go catch Bobby at the regs. That's tomorrow.

[Big J. Okerson]

Tomorrow night we have tickets still available.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, and some special guests maybe.

[Big J. Okerson]

We have four special guests tomorrow night. Four special guests? What special Santas. So if you're a fan of this show, come down.

[Bobby Kelly]

That's a weird sell.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yep.

[Bobby Kelly]

After that he's going to be in Beacon, New York. Kansas City.

[Big J. Okerson]

Special guest there too.

[Bobby Kelly]

And Beacon.

[Big J. Okerson]

Beacon special guest.

[Bobby Kelly]

Nice.

[Big J. Okerson]

Yeah. Very special guest.

[Bobby Kelly]

Really?

[Big J. Okerson]

In fact, better than me.

[Bobby Kelly]

No. Dave Chappelle's gonna be. He said yes.

[Big J. Okerson]

You like to see really good comedy.

[Bobby Kelly]

Matt Rife. No, Matt Rife's coming out doing bet 30 minutes in front of Bobby.

[Big J. Okerson]

I wish that blonde haired vixen would come up.

[Bobby Kelly]

That sexy man. I like to see him on stuffies.

[Big J. Okerson]

I'd love to sit on his lap and just do my whole act.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, give him a little stuffy.

[Big J. Okerson]

I let him do his act. Where you from?

[Bobby Kelly]

Every Tuesday night you can catch Bobby at the fat Black Pussycat lounge at the Comedy Cellar. For tickets and all of his tour dates go to punch up live slash Robert Kelly. Robert Kelly. And make sure you check out his YouTube page. YouTube.com yeah.

[Big J. Okerson]

Go sign up that. Subscribe to it. I need to get subscribers over there before we put the special out which is coming out next week. Kill box. If you haven't seen it, it's going to be up there. And all my stand ups going out all stand up all the time.

[Bobby Kelly]

Subscribe to my YouTube while you're at it too. We want to release specials soon. So please.

[Big J. Okerson]

You got these two new specials coming out.

[Bobby Kelly]

We're releasing two new specials.

[Big J. Okerson]

Can't wait to see them. Go see Big J this weekend. St. Louis at St. Louis. Helium and Christine is going to scroll any minute. Minute now. It's okay. Don't worry about it. St. Louis the 12th and the through the 14th and then he's gonna be in West Palm Beach, Providence, Boston, Wilbur Theater. Make sure you bring him a cheesesteak from somewhere around there to let them know what a cheesesteak really is. For tickets and all of the tour dates. Big J comedy.com and Punchup Live Big Jokerson for all the stuff.

[Bobby Kelly]

And is our show sold out? Are we all sold out to bu.

[Christine]

I just need to hear back from Liz. But it might be sold out.

[Big J. Okerson]

We're very close to solid. Try to get tickets. Comedycellar.com it's next week. We have a special. I'm gonna have a lot of special.

[Bobby Kelly]

Guests coming next Tuesday.

[Big J. Okerson]

Next Tuesday night we have a very, very special show. Bonfire, live Christmas show. Watch out for the aliens.

[Bobby Kelly]

Don't put your out unless you put your out.

[Big J. Okerson]

We'll be right back. It's the bonfire Jersey.

[Commercial Voice]

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[Bobby Kelly]

Can you use it in a sentence?

[Commercial Voice]

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[Big J. Okerson]

The San Francisco treat.