Robbed In Rio with Matt McCusker

Thu Oct 09 2025

Matt McCusker of "Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast" is back without Shane to promote his new Netflix special "A Humble Offering." He brings his publicist in studio who is dressed like a tennis instructor. Matt tells a tale of getting robbed on the beach of Rio De Janeiro while on vacation. Jay and Bob also have stories of prostitution and danger in Latin countries. Bobby and Patrice O'Neal found themselves in hot water in Brazil after they showed too much cash to the locals. | Passport Bros charge money to exploit the women of Cuba under the guise of being pickup artists. *To hear the full show to go www.siriusxm.com/bonfire to learn more! FOLLOW THE CREW ON SOCIAL MEDIA: @thebonfiresxm @louisjohnson @christinemevans @bigjayoakerson @robertkellylive @louwitzkee @jjbwolf

Transcript

Matt McCusker (0:00)

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Matt McCusker (1:01)

And now the bonfire with Big J.

Robert Kelly (1:03)

Okerson and Robert Kelly.

Luis J. Gomez (1:07)

The Bonfire faction talk series XM103. We had awesome guest in the house. First time on the bonfire, I believe. Second time bonfire.

Matt McCusker (1:15)

Not for a long time. I haven't been here for a long time.

Luis J. Gomez (1:17)

So he's gonna be at Helium Comedy Club in Buffalo.

Robert Kelly (1:19)

Wow.

Luis J. Gomez (1:20)

It's a long time ago. That was a different bonfire. Wow.

Matt McCusker (1:22)

It was when I was a boy.

Luis J. Gomez (1:23)

Yeah, that was just. That was Stan Soder bonfire.

Robert Kelly (1:27)

We don't. We don't say that.

Luis J. Gomez (1:28)

We're talking about that. October 17th and 18th is going to be at Helium Comedy Club in Buffalo. After that, Tulsa, Naples, Florida and Madison. For tickets and all of us tour dates go to Matt McCusker.com. it is the hilarious Matt McCusker.

Robert Kelly (1:41)

You're doing the. You're doing the old Captain Brian's.

Summary

The Bonfire – "Robbed in Rio" with Matt McCusker

Date: October 9, 2025
Hosts: Big Jay Oakerson & Robert Kelly (with Luis J. Gomez)
Guest: Matt McCusker

Episode Overview

This raucous episode of The Bonfire brings comedian Matt McCusker into the SiriusXM studios for another round of trademark, unfiltered hilarity with Big Jay, Bobby, and regular co-host Luis J. Gomez. The main theme revolves around wild travel stories—most notably Matt getting robbed in Rio—and the trio's irreverent takes on everything from international comedy audiences, local crime in Latin America, language faux pas, the sex industry abroad, and the evolving comedy scenes in Austin and New York. The bond among the comics creates a rapid-fire exchange of stories, jokes, and self-deprecation.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Catching Up & Upcoming Projects

Timestamps: 01:03–02:29

Matt's return to The Bonfire after a long hiatus—reminiscing about older, pre-Robert Kelly days.
Luis runs down Matt's upcoming comedy tour stops: Buffalo, Tulsa, Naples, Madison ([01:19]).
They joke about the quirks of comedy club owners—especially the “Captain Brian” persona at a Naples club (“You have to call him Captain Brian”—Robert, [02:00]).
Matt’s new Netflix special, A Humble Offering, drops on October 7th; filmed at Ontario Improv, California ([02:20–02:37]).

2. Touring, Fans, and California Crowds

02:32–04:11

Matt and the hosts laugh about confusion over “Ontario” (California vs. Canada) and selling tickets in blue-collar California towns.
The crew notes strong “cholo” (Latino gang) audience overlap for their comedy:
- “I mean, the most cholo looking guys... 'I listen to your shit every day, man.'” —Luis ([03:50])
- Matt feels honored by the support from the Latino community: “Yeah, the Mexicans... they fuck with me, man. It’s an honor, honestly.” ([04:03])

3. Kensington, Philadelphia & The Drug Scene

04:19–08:01

They riff on Philadelphia’s infamous Kensington neighborhood: open drug use, racial mixing due to addiction, and local rapper “Skrilla.”
Matt explains the “67” meme: “It’s some slang term for like, Kensington. It’s like an intersection in Kensington.” ([05:03])
Luis tells a story about Bert Kreischer trying to contact Skrilla live—a comical, naive brush with serious street guys ([05:55–06:48]).
“We were like the Chinese government... Panopticon. We had him pegged.” —Matt ([06:49])
They marvel at how drugs unite everyone in Kensington: “There are no racial lines drawn there... Everyone’s there for one thing... trank. They want it and a lot of it…” —Luis ([05:18])

4. Multilingual Mishaps and Brazil Slang

10:16–11:23

The hosts and Matt show off (poorly) their ability to recall foreign phrases—mainly how to say “I can’t speak this language” in a string of languages ([10:32–10:45]).
Matt discusses Brazilian Portuguese basics, advising: “El quero voce means ‘I want you.’” ([11:09])
Cross-lingual misunderstandings lead into the classic segment:
- “How much for your sister?” —Luis, joking about bartering in Brazil ([11:28])

5. Matt’s (and Bobby’s) Brazil Robbery Stories

12:02–13:24

Matt recalls being robbed at knifepoint at dawn in Rio:

“I was out all night… walking along the beach… three young men with fishing knives. I knew like, tranquillo. They took my stuff and laughed at my phrase book.” —Matt ([12:24–13:01])
He tried bartering with his credit card, but the theft remained mostly cash:

“Take my credit card and go nuts for like an hour… language barrier.” —Matt ([13:11])
Observers: “Lucky they didn’t stab you.” ([13:20])
Bobby’s version: hiring hotel security for protection at the beach, paying them $15 to keep watch ([13:26–14:01]).

6. Brazilian Street Life, Prostitution, and the “Passport Bros”

14:05–16:56; 25:10–27:59

Comic observations on Brazilian prostitution and aggressive street vendors.
Bobby explains the “favela” tax loophole—unfinished houses evade property taxes ([16:34–16:56]).
Matt, Luis, and Bobby unpack the “passport bro” trend—disgruntled Americans seeking romance and easier lives abroad:

“There’s a big movement online…guys…making viral TikToks...‘Look how hot these chicks are.’” —Matt ([25:13])
They critique Americans exploiting economic disparity for pickup artistry; mention a German vlogger who inadvertently gets Cubans arrested for illegal currency and sex work on camera ([26:41–27:39]).

7. Comedian Travel Tales—Patrice O’Neal in Brazil

19:50–22:48

Stories of bringing money to Brazilian street children—actually a dangerous move: “They’re gonna go tell somebody…” —Robert ([20:05]).
Patrice once angered a kid who summoned a “hungry abs” local—prompting a terrifying walk back to their hotel, feeling genuinely threatened ([21:10–21:28]).
“He was terrified... just, fuck.” —About Patrice, from Robert ([21:23–21:28])

8. Midgets, Bachelor Parties, and Sex Industry Sidebars

31:42–36:43

Hilarious sidebar with Luis’s story about almost hooking up with a little-person stripper on Mayhem Fest tour ([33:13–34:50]).
Bachelor party fail: Matt’s group tries to order a prostitute in Las Vegas for $50; ends with accidentally waking a guy sleeping on the floor instead ([36:44]).

9. Matt’s Special & His Life in Austin

36:43–41:14

A Humble Offering: Matt describes writing his first hour and collaborating with director Tyler Falbo ([36:43–38:10]).
Transition to Austin life:
- “I just... the weather’s nice, for kids. My kids like it… like the suburbs, but 10 minutes from the city.” —Matt ([38:15])
- “Are you in the Rogan verse?” Luis asks, referencing Joe Rogan’s Austin scene ([38:27]).
Comparisons of urban anxiety (Philly, NYC) versus the peaceful family pace of suburban life ([38:36–41:14]).

10. Comedy Evolution: Austin vs. New York

41:14–41:58

Matt and hosts contrast stand-up opportunities in Philly, Austin, New York, and LA.
Austin’s Mothership club (and others) provide multiple stage opportunities for working comics.
Matt aspires to “write books eventually and just kind of disappear” ([41:25]).

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

“We were like the Chinese government…Panopticon. We had him pegged.” —Matt McCusker ([06:49])
“There are no racial lines drawn there…Everyone’s there for one thing…trank.” —Luis J. Gomez ([05:18])
“Take my credit card and go nuts...it was like a language barrier.” —Matt McCusker ([13:11])
“If your house isn’t finished, you don’t have to pay taxes.” —Robert Kelly, on favela homes ([16:46])
“I would love to…If I didn’t have this show, I would move to another state.” —Robert Kelly on NYC ([38:36])
“I go one [hotel key]. And write that down for the record. One key.” —Matt ([29:24])

Topic Timestamps

01:03 – Matt is introduced, club talk, and tour dates
02:20 – Netflix special plug and discussion
03:31 – Cholo and blue-collar audiences
04:19 – Kensington, PA: The drug scene, Skrilla rapper story
12:02 – Matt’s Rio de Janeiro robbery story
13:26 – Bobby’s security-at-the-beach anecdote
14:25 – Street life in Brazil, prostitution, leg hair lore
19:50 – Patrice O’Neal’s Brazil adventures
25:10 – The “Passport Bros” phenomenon
31:42 – Midget/little person sex worker stories
36:43 – Matt’s special, Austin life, comedy cities
41:25 – Aspirations beyond stand-up, writing books

Tone & Style

Unfiltered, conversational, and self-deprecating with lots of inside comic jabs, observational stories, and wild tangents. The group manages to poke fun at themselves, each other, and their surroundings while maintaining camaraderie and genuine admiration for the strange, shared world of comedy.

For New Listeners

This episode is a great sampler of The Bonfire at its best: rowdy comedian storytelling, junk-drawer knowledge about the world, and the chaotic fun of irrepressible hosts with a talented guest. If you’re looking for a blend of travel horror stories, behind-the-curtain comedy reflections, and a barrage of punchlines, this is one not to miss.