Sea Legs with Tim Butterly

Summary

Podcast Summary: The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly Episode Title: Sea Legs with Tim Butterly
Release Date: February 28, 2025

The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly is a candid and engaging podcast where hosts Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly, alongside their friend Christine, dive into a plethora of topics ranging from comedy and entertainment to personal anecdotes and audience interactions. In the episode titled "Sea Legs with Tim Butterly," the trio, joined by guest Tim Butterly, shares their humorous and unfiltered experiences from a recent cruise, offering listeners an entertaining glimpse into life onboard and the challenges that come with it.

1. Opening Remarks and Musical Banter (01:06 - 04:30)

The episode kicks off with light-hearted banter about the song "Tarzan Boy," sparking a playful debate on its use in various movies and its overall appeal.

• Bobby Kelly (01:16): "Fun fact, this guy. This song is the raining blood to Tim Butterly's life."

• Big J (02:01): "A fire blows the same. What does it say?"

The conversation evolves into humorous dissection of the song's lyrics, blending jokes about misunderstandings and playful jabs between the hosts.

2. Introduction of Tim Butterly and Cruise Experiences (06:41 - 10:12)

Tim Butterly joins the conversation, and the hosts delve into their recent cruise experience. They recount their onboard interactions, emphasizing the blend of entertainment and everyday challenges.

• Bobby Kelly (06:41): "I want to hear about this friggin cruise you went on with you, your."

• Big J (07:33): "But when you go in at like 6:00, it's like this beautiful outdoor, quiet, awesome place. And then you come out after the second show and it's... Yeah, it's a 1980s movie."

The discussion highlights the dichotomy of serene moments versus the vibrant, chaotic post-show atmosphere, painting a vivid picture of cruise life.

3. Navigating Fan Interactions and Misunderstandings (12:44 - 16:18)

A fan call introduces a poignant yet humorous segment where a listener confronts Big J about a past interaction. The exchange is filled with tension and quick apologies, showcasing the hosts' ability to handle unexpected and awkward moments with humor.

• Fan (12:44): "I gave you a hoodie with Corey Feldman as Michael Jackson... you gave me the nastiest look."

• Big J (13:03): "Yeah, but, dude, can I just say something? I don't like Puerto Ricans. I'm not a fan of your people."

• Christine (13:24): "I don't want to buy any cologne."

The segment underscores the sometimes unpredictable nature of live interactions, blending genuine apologies with comedic relief.

4. Detailed Cruise Narratives and Staff Interactions (15:35 - 31:25)

The hosts recount various incidents from the cruise, including interactions with staff and experiences with onboard entertainment. They discuss the challenges of dealing with non-English speaking staff and the frustrations of limited services.

• Bobby Kelly (15:55): "We moved right on... It was just some queers from Baltimore."

• Christine (27:07): "Mike was over it. Why was he flipping?"

The narrative paints a chaotic yet humorous picture of life at sea, filled with quirky characters and unexpected hurdles.

5. Musical Performances and Critiques (31:35 - 44:39)

A significant portion of the episode focuses on the cruise's musical lineup, particularly critiquing performances by bands like POD and Buck Cherry. The hosts express their disappointment and amusement at the quality of performances, blending personal expectations with comedic critiques.

• Christine (38:43): "Six months of anticipation to see Buck Cherry and their dripping wet performance... about having sex with a slut."

• Bobby Kelly (39:10): "It's Wednesday night, and tonight's tonight, and we're going to do some drugs tonight."

The discussion highlights the contrast between anticipation and reality, providing listeners with an insider's view of cruise entertainment woes.

6. Closing Remarks and Promotions (44:55 - 46:51)

As the episode winds down, the hosts transition into promoting their own and their guest’s shows, blending promotional content seamlessly with their signature humor.

• Bobby Kelly (44:55): "Check out the Tim Butterly show. And you can check out dad Meat, available wherever you listen to podcasts and YouTube."

• Big J (45:34): "Big J's gonna be at the Funny Bone, Orlando... tickets and all the dates. BigJcomedy.com guys, we'll be right back."

The closing segment reinforces the community aspect of the podcast, encouraging listeners to engage with their extended network of shows and events.

Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Bobby Kelly (03:35): "Why do I have to make my neck veins pop out to feel you in my ass? That's crazy."

• Big J (05:15): "I just looked over and I was like, why do I feel bad about not doing homework?"

• Christine (13:03): "I don't like Puerto Ricans. I'm not a fan of your people. So when you come up on the street, I get nervous and scared."

• Bobby Kelly (39:27): "Check out the Tim Butterly show. And you can check out dad Meat, available wherever you listen to podcasts and YouTube."

Conclusion

"Sea Legs with Tim Butterly" is a quintessential episode of The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly, showcasing the hosts' ability to blend humor with genuine storytelling. From dissecting catchy yet cheesy tunes to navigating the tumultuous waters of cruise life, the hosts provide listeners with an entertaining and relatable narrative. Through their interactions with guests and fans, the episode encapsulates the essence of the show: blunt, candid, and unapologetically funny. Whether you're a longtime listener or new to the podcast, this episode offers a delightful mix of laughter, frustration, and camaraderie that is sure to resonate with a wide audience.

Transcript

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[Bobby Kelly]

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[Christine]

And now the bonfire with Big J.

[Bobby Kelly]

Okerson and Robert Kelly, everybody. Fun fact, this guy. This song is the raining blood to Tim Butterly's life.

[Christine]

Everybody.

[Bobby Kelly]

Rain and blood comes on or Jungle boy. Tarzan Boy.

[Christine]

I can't. I'm gonna stand for the rest of it.

[Bobby Kelly]

I gotta let it out, man.

[Big J]

This does something to you, huh, man?

[Christine]

Oh yeah. I'm charged, right?

[Big J]

You want to arm wrestle? I think.

[Christine]

I think they. They ended a lot of movies with this song. Just as my body started producing testosterone.

[Bobby Kelly]

Let's see, what's the list of songs that Tarzan Boy was in?

[Christine]

What's the movies?

[Big J]

I like.

[Bobby Kelly]

This part's all right.

[Big J]

I like that.

[Bobby Kelly]

But I don't like.

[Christine]

This part is the best part of the song.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, no, it's the worst part.

[Christine]

What?

[Bobby Kelly]

It's what makes it cheesy.

[Christine]

It's the hook.

[Big J]

What are you talking about?

[Bobby Kelly]

It was featured in Teenage mutant ninja turtles 3. Beverly Hills ninja.

[Christine]

Oh, come on. When they go back in time. Turtles in time to be used in more than that.

[Big J]

Tarzan Boy is the name of the band.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, no.

[Big J]

What is the name of the song?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yes.

[Big J]

Okay, what's the name of the band?

[Bobby Kelly]

Massimo.

[Big J]

Massimo.

[Bobby Kelly]

Massimo. No. Something like that.

[Big J]

Baltimore.

[Bobby Kelly]

Baltimore.

[Big J]

So it's so not Massimo. I thought it was a ninja.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, dude.

[Christine]

Beverly Hills Ninja.

[Big J]

Please, dude.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, no.

[Big J]

Take me back when it was Massimo. I thought it was like this Italian exotic, man. Baltimore. It's just some queers from Baltimore.

[Bobby Kelly]

Baltimore, right.

[Big J]

Yeah, just a couple hipsters from Baltimore. Stavros's friends. What is he saying right there?

[Bobby Kelly]

Christine, please give me the honor.

[Big J]

Is he getting an order tonight?

[Christine]

Tonight he's begging for sex.

[Bobby Kelly]

Let's see.

[Big J]

What is he saying?

[Bobby Kelly]

Chrissy, move your head. Night tonight. Give me the other. Give me the. Give me the other Anal. Oh, girlfriend experience the other. French kiss.

[Christine]

No, the other.

[Bobby Kelly]

No.

[Christine]

Aa.

[Big J]

What is this song about? This about love.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's about nothing.

[Big J]

A fire blows the same. What does it say?

[Bobby Kelly]

Jungle life I'm living in the open. Oh, I know what it's about now.

[Big J]

What's it about?

[Bobby Kelly]

Easy, Tarzan boy Time to cut loose with the guys in the jungle. You know what I mean?

[Big J]

Oh, so it is.

[Bobby Kelly]

Look. Jungle life I'm living in the open Native beat that carries on burning bright A fire blows the signal to the sky Right, right. I sit and wonder does the message get to you? Does anybody find out that I'm living closeted in the trees like a Tarzan boy? Give me the other.

[Big J]

Anal, anal. And the. Oh, yeah. Break it against the other. And it hurts so bad because he's never had it. Yeah. So he's going, oh, yeah, that's him getting back.

[Bobby Kelly]

Or maybe he's asking for. Like, it was two guys, and the bigger dick guy went in his butt first and he's asking to give him the. Give me the other.

[Christine]

Give me an easy round night tonight.

[Bobby Kelly]

Ooh. Give me the other. Give me the other. This one's too big. This one hurts. Start with the other.

[Big J]

What if it was the first one? The little one at first. Nice is enough. Give me the other.

[Bobby Kelly]

Give me the other. I can't. Are you in there? I couldn't tell.

[Big J]

Let's go. Positive.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. Why do I have to make my neck veins pop out to feel you in my ass? That's crazy. You should fill me up. It's an.

[Big J]

How am I going to sing this chorus if I don't have a big one in my butt?

[Bobby Kelly]

Whoa. Oh, Monkey business on a sunny afternoon these are real lyrics. I play alone while rushing across the forest. This is.

[Big J]

Nobody noticed that? DJ Lou looks like a substitute teacher at a community college.

[Bobby Kelly]

You look like a Chinese substitute teacher.

[Big J]

What happened?

[Bobby Kelly]

Maybe have a special mogwai in back.

[Big J]

Ah, hello.

[Bobby Kelly]

He's gonna sell us mogwais.

[Big J]

Yeah. Do not feed at the midnight.

[Bobby Kelly]

I tell you, if we put a couple. If we give you a milky eye contact. Dude, you'd be an old sage Asian.

[Big J]

I just looked over and I was like, why do I feel bad about not doing homework?

[Bobby Kelly]

Is this why you got upset about no, aa. It's African American, not Asian American. You're fine, Lou. Oh, no, no. Asian American. Yeah. What girl complains about the dicks coming the for money are too small. No Asians. I'm trying to walk. I'm trying not to walk tomorrow.

[Big J]

You know that the thing with Asian dudes that they get mad because nobody want. They have to do they have to marry Asian women. I talked to a couple Asian dudes after the show in the front of the Cellar one night and they were mad because nobody wants to fuck them.

[Bobby Kelly]

True.

[Big J]

They have to have like set up marriages and stuff because white girls want to bang black dudes and Spanish girls want to bang white dudes and black dudes and other Spanish guys. Nobody, not a person really wants to bang an Asian dude.

[Bobby Kelly]

Not even the Asian ladies.

[Big J]

And they feel bad about that.

[Bobby Kelly]

They should.

[Big J]

And I feel bad about that.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. Well, let me say on behalf of the white man, it's hard.

[Big J]

Oh, God. I love when I throw a ball up in the air and you smack it out of the park.

[Bobby Kelly]

Very, very happy to know that. Sorry, sorry, Asian guys. You're going to be nose the little dick ones. I'd feel bad for you if I had a bigger dick, but I don't. So you. Thank you for making the average dick size small enough that I feel good about myself once in a while. Thank you, thank you for lowering the global. Global average of penis. Dude.

[Big J]

I want to hear about this friggin cruise you went on with you, your.

[Bobby Kelly]

Boy, Mikey Fenoya, Tim and Mrs. Butterly. Yeah, yeah, we went to Miami first. Do the Improv. What a wonderful staff. The Miami Improv.

[Big J]

I mean, it's.

[Bobby Kelly]

I mean they are.

[Big J]

It's Little Cuba. They put hearts on. They're the best.

[Christine]

They drew hearts on my check.

[Bobby Kelly]

I mean, like, they are the sweetest people. Yeah, they're so sweet.

[Big J]

That's a great club. And the guy who runs all the people there are sweet as hell.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, yeah, Justin, Great. Yeah, great club, great people. It's just, it's. It's so Miami. Like just there. It's just so Miami. When you walk out, like, all right, we have the car waiting for you outside. You have to walk through like a thumping club that's just technically supposed to be a bar. It's a Copper Blues that is supposed to be a live music bar, but it is just naked women dancing. Yeah, it's awesome. Yeah.

[Christine]

Every night they open the door for us. It's like, all right, see you guys tomorrow. What's it, 7:15 tomorrow?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Christine]

See you then open the door. Exactly.

[Big J]

But when you go in at like 6:00, it's like this beautiful outdoor, quiet, awesome place. And then you come out after the second show and it's. Yeah, it's a 1980s movie.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's thumping.

[Big J]

Yeah, it really is a disco.

[Bobby Kelly]

What is?

[Big J]

I feel immediately fat when I walk out of.

[Bobby Kelly]

The second show was Miami. That was the gig where guys, they kicked the girl out.

[Christine]

Was that that gig in the beginning of the show?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, yeah. She just.

[Christine]

We were watching. They had the CCTV of the stage and as they're filling in the show, there was like a problem person every single night. Well, just sitting there watching security footage of people being thrown out.

[Bobby Kelly]

There was a lady. A lady gets kicked out. But then we didn't realize that she got kicked out. Her boyfriend and his friend stayed and when asked about, like, was like, where is she? They're like, I don't know. They kicked her out. And I'm like. He's like, I paid for these tickets, but I'm not going nowhere. I'm here to see you, dude. And I was like, do you think she's outside still? He's like, maybe, who knows? And then it turns out she was. After the show, she was just out there drunkenly waiting for him.

[Big J]

Jay, I just. Real quick side note, are we being like surveyed right now?

[Bobby Kelly]

Why?

[Big J]

I don't know. I just noticed there's a person in here that I don't know.

[Christine]

Tim Butterly.

[Big J]

No, not you. I know you. Behind you. There's a guy just in the studio. Do you see him?

[Bobby Kelly]

No.

[Big J]

Okay, there's a guy right behind Tim. There's a guy.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, what's he look like?

[Big J]

He's. He looks like. Excuse me. He looks like. He could be Lewis's uncle, Louis Gomez.

[Bobby Kelly]

A black gentleman or.

[Big J]

He looks maybe Spanish. Maybe light skinned black, but Spanish, more Spanish. Yeah, you know, maybe he was probably dangerous when he was younger. Right now he's. He's actually a nice guy. Probably helps kids out, probably has a nice family.

[Bobby Kelly]

I want to keep going with the. I don't. I don't see him either, but I do want to say it does look like he yells at kids to get on track.

[Big J]

Yeah, yeah. Like right now he helps him, but he hurt them before.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Christine]

I've been in these streets.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, I killed my stepson, but that was a different person. A man can repent.

[Big J]

I don't know who he is. I don't know what's going.

[Bobby Kelly]

Is this like, I'M guessing Spanish Lou. We have white Lou, black Lou, and Spanish Lou.

[Big J]

Okay. Is this a. I don't know. Like, nobody introduced. Like, he introduced himself when I came in. I gave him a pound, but I don't. I don't know. What. Is he here? Are we being judged? Is he a friend of somebody's?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yes.

[Big J]

Who is he?

[Bobby Kelly]

I think he's Tobias SiriusXM's grandson. He's testing out if he wants to take the studio from us. I don't know if, you know, as soon as they start moving in ethnic, when they bring in ethnic people and turntables, we're out of here.

[Big J]

Okay.

[Bobby Kelly]

That's how. You know.

[Big J]

That's what they did to Jim and Sam.

[Bobby Kelly]

That's what they did to us constantly. You just shoot me. Come into work one day, me and soda. We come into work and go, hey, what's this DJ booth set up in here for? They bring in a guest and they go, no, they're getting rid of you. This is Rich. He runs the absurd moron Instagram.

[Big J]

Okay.

[Bobby Kelly]

The one always doing the Photoshops for us. Yeah, yeah.

[Big J]

Okay. What's up, man? I'm sorry. Great work. I love your work. And I. Nobody explained that to me. Well, I just walked in and it was a dude sitting there.

[Bobby Kelly]

Absurd. More. And if you don't mind me saying, it's a little lazy. Just put a picture of Chaz Bono up and say it's me. Even though it is very accurate. Well, it is extremely, extremely accurate. Where is it?

[Big J]

Can I see it?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. By the way, am I more thrilled to be down to that size?

[Big J]

By the way, get down to Chaz Bono.

[Bobby Kelly]

I've finally gotten the Chaz Bono weight.

[Big J]

You're Hollywood fat.

[Bobby Kelly]

I've gotten down the Chaz Bono weight.

[Big J]

Wow. Simp.

[Bobby Kelly]

Simp by Jacob. Delightful.

[Big J]

All right, dude. All right. Perfect.

[Bobby Kelly]

I thought he was a Joe derosa. Loves. Loves children. Subway.

[Big J]

And.

[Bobby Kelly]

And campaign.

[Big J]

Campaign. All right, that's great. Oh, what's that one?

[Tim Butterly]

You want this one?

[Big J]

Oh, the Dane Cook one.

[Tim Butterly]

Oh.

[Bobby Kelly]

Stopped.

[Tim Butterly]

Comedian Dane Cook's child bride, Kelsey Taylor, describes how a lowly radio producer terrorized her family for over five years.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, it's got the Jacob. You literally ruined all my fun.

[Tim Butterly]

Look, it's me after the dentist. Armenian witch overdoses on Philly drug drink.

[Bobby Kelly]

Do you remember? I forgot that when Christine went to the dentist and she couldn't smile, we just kept making her laugh and half her face didn't work. So she would just sit here for an hour, go. Like, guys, she's like she couldn't help it. It was her laugh. Just her face didn't join in.

[Big J]

All right. I just wanted to know. I was sitting here. I didn't know if we had a who it was, but now. Thank you. Nice.

[Tim Butterly]

That was also mine.

[Big J]

Nice to meet you. No, it's okay. I forgot.

[Tim Butterly]

I mean, everybody's back.

[Big J]

Nobody said, hey, this is the. This is the guy that does all this stuff. Yes. What's up, buddy?

[Fan]

I've been a fan forever, ever since Tourgasm.

[Big J]

Oh.

[Fan]

And it's something that's been bothering me for. For a little while.

[Big J]

What?

[Fan]

Not this past Christmas show. The one before that.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Fan]

I came up to you. I was very forthcoming. Said I'm a big fan. I gave you a gift, and you gave me the nastiest look.

[Big J]

I did?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yes.

[Big J]

What did you give me?

[Fan]

I gave you a hoodie with Corey Feldman as Michael Jackson. I said, hi, Bobby. I'm absurd, moron. I don't know if you know. I do a lot of photoshops. You gave me the meanest look.

[Big J]

Yeah, but, dude, can I just say something? I don't like Puerto Ricans. I'm not a fan of your people. So when you come up on the street, I get nervous and scared.

[Christine]

I don't want to buy any cologne.

[Big J]

Get away from me. It's not you. It's just your face.

[Bobby Kelly]

You.

[Fan]

You looked at me like I was asking for ransom money for Max.

[Big J]

No, I'll take you.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, dude, I guess I'll take your bag of garbage.

[Big J]

Listen to me. Come here. Oh, God.

[Christine]

I feel what I got to do. Wear this.

[Big J]

Come here, buddy. I'm so sorry.

[Christine]

Misunderstanding, you guys.

[Big J]

I would never do that.

[Bobby Kelly]

Well, maybe it was the old Bobby, if anything. Maybe that was the old Bobby, though.

[Big J]

No, it's not the old I'm.

[Christine]

I'm all.

[Big J]

I'm. I. I'm too good.

[Bobby Kelly]

I think last week, I think you had a lot of that last remaining anger.

[Big J]

No, not at all. I did. That was. It was it? Was it? Did you. Did something happen before it.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, yeah. You farted in your hand and put it under his nose. The whole thing was really disrespectful.

[Big J]

So sorry, buddy.

[Christine]

How'd you feel when you went home that night after meeting one of your heroes and having him be so rude to you?

[Big J]

Felt very bad, buddy. I feel terrible right now. Can I give you a Dum Dum?

[Fan]

Bobby, I gave you a gift. I have yet to see it on any podcast.

[Bobby Kelly]

That's why those things happen to you. Is this this year, Christine, it's that behavior.

[Big J]

Is this this year, Christine? Is this this year?

[Tim Butterly]

It's for New Orleans.

[Big J]

I'm not going.

[Christine]

He's making digital voodoo dolls now, actually. Be mean to me.

[Whole Foods Market Ad]

You're fat.

[Big J]

Did you do that? Did you do that? You.

[Bobby Kelly]

Well, the original. Be nicer.

[Christine]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

This was for the Vegas.

[Big J]

Remember?

[Bobby Kelly]

They made you a fat robot Now I made you a fat robot with a real stomach and belly button, buddy. I feel so lifelike.

[Big J]

I feel terrible about that. I think my. Something might have happened or right before that, I might have something. Someone might. I never would do that. I appreciate you, man.

[Bobby Kelly]

Christina, Love Connection.

[Tim Butterly]

I just tweeted out this handle, so go look.

[Bobby Kelly]

So good.

[Big J]

Oh, my God.

[Bobby Kelly]

So good.

[Big J]

I'm gonna get. I'm gonna get you a gift, dude. I'm gonna get you. I have this hoodie with me, and with my. I'm gonna give this hoodie.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, yeah, that's right. I forgot when Kevin just talked to Hannah Gatsby.

[Big J]

This is so good, dude.

[Tim Butterly]

So funny.

[Bobby Kelly]

Well, we wanted to talk about shiprocked.

[Big J]

I want to talk about shiprocked and I want to talk about. Yeah, you with Mike.

[Bobby Kelly]

We were in Miami, and then we got on very easy getting on the boat. I will say it wasn't too much of a ordeal.

[Tim Butterly]

Well, your talent, huh?

[Christine]

Yeah, we got the talent treatment everywhere we went.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, no, for sure. I'm saying that's good. So it's not that, like, it's. It could still be a pain in the ass sometimes. We've done it where it's still sort of a pain in the ass. This was. We moved right on.

[Tim Butterly]

You guys kept all your bags.

[Bobby Kelly]

Kept all our bags.

[Big J]

Can I do this real quick?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yes.

[Big J]

I'm going to give you my pivot.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, wow.

[Big J]

I'm going to give you the first guest piven.

[Bobby Kelly]

That's the first guest pivot ever that you can have.

[Big J]

And I apologize from whatever I was going through or whatever I did. You shouldn't have had to go through that. And thank you for being a fan all these years, and I'm sorry about that. You can have it for 25 minutes.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. All right.

[Big J]

Jacob, could you not downplay it?

[Christine]

You piece.

[Tim Butterly]

We need it back.

[Big J]

I want you to tell Christine all the jewelry is fake.

[Bobby Kelly]

Why don't you let him. Why don't you let him put Dawn's face on the glass? Maybe that'll make it better.

[Big J]

You want me to let him take my wife's face and push it against a window?

[Bobby Kelly]

It's black history. Month.

[Christine]

He's.

[Bobby Kelly]

Don't say that.

[Big J]

You don't know what I was gonna say.

[Christine]

He's charging up like Godzilla.

[Bobby Kelly]

He's gonna let out a big one.

[Big J]

You know what? Like baby Godzilla. But I'm Baby Godzilla. It just comes like this. Little R.

[Bobby Kelly]

Baby Godzilla.

[Big J]

I love baby Godzilla.

[Bobby Kelly]

I. I only got to see there.

[Christine]

Come here comes the next Photoshop.

[Bobby Kelly]

In the two and a half days that I was on Shiprock, I only got to see one band that I was like into going to see was pod. We saw POD first night. Ripped it, Brought it down. Brought the house down.

[Big J]

People of destruction, huh? What's the name again? What does POD stand for?

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, Pay. Payable upon death.

[Christine]

On death.

[Bobby Kelly]

Payable on death.

[Big J]

Yeah, they good?

[Bobby Kelly]

Pod? Yeah, you know Pod?

[Big J]

Yeah, man. Pod.

[Tim Butterly]

They actually rock. Let me hear them a few times. This is from Shipwrecked.

[Big J]

I don't know. I don't know Pod. Like, you know Pod?

[Bobby Kelly]

No, you absolutely do.

[Big J]

All right, tell me the song that I know.

[Christine]

Oh, this. Okay. Yeah, this was the show that we were. You know. Here comes the boom, you know.

[Big J]

Is this where you're standing?

[Bobby Kelly]

Go to. Just go to the songs, like the. The hits, you know.

[Big J]

Is this the actual cruise?

[Bobby Kelly]

I was. Yes.

[Christine]

No, go to the part of their set. Go to the part of the set where the guitar player admonished the handicap section for not standing up and giving it up for them. Yeah, they all talk, like, strong. Bad, too. So he's like, this is the lazy section right here. Why aren't you guys on your feet? And they had put, like, the spotlight on this front row group, and you could see them waving their hands at him. He's just tuning his guitars. He's like, what's up? How come you guys aren't on your feet?

[Bobby Kelly]

I guess the people who sit the closest don't feel like dancing and moving. Also, Tim kept pointing out that that's my favorite dude. He does like. Like when he just looked like. Like the shred motions, like, to the audience, but not. Not shredding at all. Like, he would just, like, go out there and play the actual, like, rhythm guitar part of it, but then just be like. And then at the end of it, just be like.

[Christine]

Like pounded his chest and heart fingers.

[Bobby Kelly]

So, like, put your foot up on, like, the monitor and then just play the. Come on, turn this up.

[Tim Butterly]

Early on, rap rock.

[Big J]

Guy looks like me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay.

[Bobby Kelly]

I know why she's smiling at me.

[Big J]

Yeah, I remember the song.

[Bobby Kelly]

And then come on. Their biggest hit, dude, Youth of the Nation. I feel so awesome.

[Christine]

Come on, man. Hit after hit after hit.

[Big J]

I mean, they got two.

[Bobby Kelly]

Hit after hit after hit after hit after hit.

[Christine]

That's about it. Four hits.

[Big J]

Four hits? Yeah. There's four hits.

[Bobby Kelly]

Now.

[Big J]

This is when they were younger.

[Bobby Kelly]

Nope.

[Big J]

Because it looks like a. Physically, they look different.

[Bobby Kelly]

This is all them younger.

[Big J]

Okay. This is younger, but now they're fat in jumpsuits.

[Christine]

They're keeping it together.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, he looks all right.

[Christine]

They look fine.

[Bobby Kelly]

He grew his dreads back, too.

[Tim Butterly]

They have.

[Big J]

One year.

[Tim Butterly]

They had, like, the two hottest girls I'd ever seen on the boat. And they were just hot chicks the entire time.

[Bobby Kelly]

You remember this song, right?

[Big J]

I do, yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

We are the youth of the nation.

[Big J]

I do. I like this band. I just didn't.

[Bobby Kelly]

Now play. I feel so alive.

[Big J]

So what happened? They were on this thing.

[Bobby Kelly]

Hang on, I'm gonna play this. Too many now. You said you. You. I don't know. Pod. I'm showing you. Not only do you know them, you would have known several songs.

[Big J]

I want to hear. I want you to spill some tea about this.

[Christine]

Did we say what happened? About when they were telling the people to stand up?

[Bobby Kelly]

What do you mean? Oh, no, no. With the handicap people. Yeah, please.

[Christine]

Oh, yeah. So. So he's in between songs, too. He's already like, why? This is delays. He's like, why don't you guys stand up? And then they finally get his intention, and they're trying to explain that it's a guy with one leg that he's talking to. He's holding his prosthetic leg in the air. And they don't do, like, a joke or anything like that.

[Bobby Kelly]

No excuse.

[Christine]

Yeah. Just like he said. I'm not trying to discriminate. And they just went into playing southbound.

[Bobby Kelly]

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[Big J]

We really do have a lot of.

[Bobby Kelly]

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[Big J]

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[Bobby Kelly]

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[Big J]

I love a Whole body tackle Whole.

[Bobby Kelly]

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[Big J]

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[Bobby Kelly]

I believe it's El Burro, not Jackass. You're being a real El Burro.

[Big J]

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[Bobby Kelly]

Bobby, this song. This will be three.

[Big J]

Yeah, I do. Yeah, I like this song too. Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

Feel so alive.

[Big J]

I love when guys pretend to have an English accent.

[Bobby Kelly]

They're Mexican. California people.

[Big J]

Yeah. When they sing with that. That thing.

[Bobby Kelly]

And then South Town and this is it. Bobby. After this.

[Big J]

Wow. This must have been great.

[Christine]

This was actually the highlight. This song on the last day they played on the deck at night.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Christine]

Completely packed, all three levels completely full. The. The. At this point we're on our way back. So the sh. The ship is trucking through the water. The wind is going crazy. There's like water coming off of the water park on us. We're being sprayed. And. And they hit South Town and everyone went bananas.

[Big J]

What was that? Was that hippie fanoia doing reading a book somewhere?

[Bobby Kelly]

No, we were going to that point.

[Christine]

Terrorizing terror. The Malaysian staff of the boat.

[Bobby Kelly]

The whole weekend Malaysian staff was getting the biz.

[Big J]

Why?

[Tim Butterly]

What was happening to the staff?

[Big J]

Why was he mean to the staff?

[Christine]

He was stern.

[Bobby Kelly]

He wasn't mean to stay.

[Big J]

Why? Why were you stern with Filipinos?

[Bobby Kelly]

He's over it.

[Big J]

Over what?

[Bobby Kelly]

They're Filipino. Shit.

[Big J]

Well, he really moved to Connecticut and became uppity, didn't he?

[Tim Butterly]

Mike was.

[Big J]

What?

[Bobby Kelly]

Mike was over it.

[Tim Butterly]

When you think about Mike Fenoya as a shiprock's choice might not be the best.

[Christine]

Why was he old mean Mike showed his face on the cruise?

[Big J]

Mike is a very nice guy.

[Christine]

One of the nicest I've ever met.

[Big J]

But almost too nice. There's something behind it.

[Bobby Kelly]

He's hiding a darkness.

[Big J]

I mean. Hey, what's up, Bob?

[Bobby Kelly]

Mike.

[Big J]

Hey, Mike. How you doing, buddy? Good to see you.

[Christine]

We found the yang to his yin on this trip. Dude, he was ready to explode.

[Big J]

Why?

[Christine]

I don't know.

[Bobby Kelly]

What.

[Christine]

I don't know what turned his mood actually. It might have been me making fun of him for flipping out on people probably.

[Big J]

Why was he flipping?

[Christine]

Okay.

[Bobby Kelly]

The one that got me at catering was really funny was these guys are. They're puzzled, non English speaking people whose full job is to slave like squirt disinfectant on your hands. That's their job. That's what they live and die for, these people. And he's standing there while Mike's in line. We're all in line waiting for, like, shitty pizza or something. And he's just looking. And Mike just has, like, a. Mike just looks at me. He's like, like, what's. Like, can I help you, man? And I'm like, mike, he's here to squirt juice on your hands. He's like, I know, but it's like. He's like, can I help you? He's looking at me.

[Christine]

I'm like, I swear to God. He's like, you're just fucking looking at.

[Bobby Kelly]

Me.

[Christine]

Mike, what are you doing?

[Bobby Kelly]

And the guy's just like, oh, help. Help. Put his stuff on hand. And Mike's like, right?

[Christine]

He was doing gorilla sign language to clean Mike's hands for him. Mike's just like, you got a fucking problem, D? Because you're staring right at me. I'm not going anywhere.

[Bobby Kelly]

Hey, you want me to fucking gone? Get me out. Make me leave. You want me to leave? I don't think anybody wants you to leave. Right? Yeah, because the guy's coming. I mean, he wants me to.

[Christine]

I got every right to be here, man. I'm.

[Big J]

What did you say to him?

[Christine]

It was like kind of like a quiet little thing, and the moment almost passed, and I said, mike, what the fuck was that? And he goes, what? What? What? Like, he clearly thought it was going to go under the radar. He was like, no, I mean, you know, I was just, like, messing around with him a little bit. No, you weren't.

[Bobby Kelly]

You can't razz a guy by asking. Problem is why he's staring at you. Well, what, man? Quiet. Just say, no, thank you. You can be. Oh, no, I'm good. Thank you.

[Big J]

They're slaves.

[Christine]

So I wouldn't stop bringing it up. And then every interaction that he had with anybody, as soon as it was over, I'd be like, mike, what the.

[Bobby Kelly]

Damn, man. The guy just asking if you want a beer.

[Big J]

That's. That's the worst when you're on tilt.

[Christine]

Oh, yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

So Mike's got patience for one thing. So it's like, what do you know? I mean, so he could be like. If he was calling. If he was calling, like, the thing. They order, like, drinks or something, right? Yeah, he's got one patience in him. So he's got. Yeah, I don't know. I guess like, four Miller Lights, and it's like. Then I guess Michelob Ultras then. And then by the next one, it's a wrap. It's like, what do you have? How about. Let's start with what do you have before you can tell me what you don't. You know, it's like that, and you're like, yeah, he already popped.

[Christine]

He also had another really good movie.

[Bobby Kelly]

He's got one patience in him. He has one what? One patience.

[Christine]

I. I didn't.

[Big J]

So if he gets ice cream, it's like, can I get chocolate? Do you want sprinkles? Did I say sprinkles?

[Bobby Kelly]

Because you've already used up my one patience. I think it's. It's not even one patience per person. It's one patience in general.

[Christine]

Maybe time. He might. He might have a cool down of 30 minutes on that. One patience, dude.

[Bobby Kelly]

One patience.

[Christine]

He's got to spend it wisely.

[Big J]

That's the thing is he's so, hey, man. Hey, what's going on? And then it turn. You can see.

[Bobby Kelly]

Bite your calf off.

[Big J]

There's something that will turn quick.

[Bobby Kelly]

Wolverine. Dude, that makes me.

[Christine]

It's like a rescue dog. He's around kids all the time. I don't know what happened.

[Bobby Kelly]

I don't know why he bit this lowly janitor.

[Christine]

Yeah, he also did a really fun thing. Anytime we were in the buffets, whatever he was getting, it was instead of reaching for it, he would ask someone behind if they had a fresh one that they could give him instead. And so he constantly had people running brand new stuff out for him. And I didn't get a chance to get in his ass about it.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, I tell you, I didn't even notice much of that. I just know that he came to the table one time, I go go, where'd you get that pasta from? He's like, I had to make it. I go, what? I go, because if they have, like, pasta out, but it has, like, red sauce on it. He goes, yeah, I just see if he'd make a little. With like a little oil and garlic.

[Christine]

Yeah, if you ask him, they'll do it.

[Big J]

He's one of. He's one of those.

[Tim Butterly]

He was asking for new food at the buffet every time he went to the buffet.

[Christine]

No, not even new food. Different food. Hey, do you have any of that without potatoes in it? Could you just run up a new batch real quick? And then you turn to me and.

[Bobby Kelly]

He'D be like, I do like the idea. You turn to me.

[Christine]

He'd be like, they'll do it if you ask.

[Big J]

I was like, they don't want to.

[Bobby Kelly]

I do. I'll tell you what, though. I don't like. I don't like a place that has the ingredients but won't make the Thing. And I say, that's where me and Mike will bond on that. Don't tell me you can't do the thing. It's like, hey, can I get this? And they go, we can. He goes, sure you can. Because there's. I'm looking at all the ingredients laid out.

[Big J]

I know, but they. It's like they're cooking for 5,000 people.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Tim Butterly]

Not at Cracker Bar.

[Big J]

It's not like you're. You're 70 miles out in the middle of nowhere. These guys barely speak English, and they got a bald, angry guy coming up. Yeah, make something different.

[Christine]

Hey, face. I like clean pasta.

[Big J]

I know you guys made a pasta and pizza. You got peanut butter and jelly back there you can flip up for me.

[Christine]

You throw me together a cacio e pepe real quick, please. You have everything you need for it.

[Bobby Kelly]

Your cheese, your pepper, your pasta.

[Christine]

Shave some parmigiano. Reggiano on it. How complicated is this? But you guys, they'll do it if you ask.

[Bobby Kelly]

Did you guys. Did you guys ever make it to a. To a restaurant?

[Christine]

Only on the beach in Half Moon Cay. They did, like, a barbecue catering thing out there. The rest of it, we just did the buffet.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Christine]

And it was fine.

[Big J]

Well, it is funny. It is funny because you go onto these cruises with people, and there is a breaking point, attention point that you hit. And you can either hit it, like, right away or towards the end, there's a point where somebody's gonna go, hey.

[Bobby Kelly]

Man, Fenoy's is day two. Mines is day four.

[Tim Butterly]

It sounds like Feno's was, like, in Miami, Fenoy it in Hartford.

[Christine]

It was night one. We were in Jay's cabin, and he was grabbing beers for us before we walked out and down to whatever I think it was. Guess it was pod, right?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Christine]

And that was when you were like, hey, Mike, you want a beer?

[Bobby Kelly]

And, oh, dude, that. The tone of it. That's what we made. He laughed about it all weekend, too. It's funny. Like, it's. Again, it's just his. He can't hide any emotion, or he just shows the wrong on his face and eyes. But it was such a. I laughed the whole walk because of how funny this was, was the exact interaction. I went, mike, do you want a beer to bring with you? And he goes, excuse me. And I just started laughing. I go, what do you think it possibly was that I said, excuse me. Excuse me. He goes, I don't know what. I didn't call you a. For sure. I just asked if you wanted a beer. For the walk, buddy.

[Tim Butterly]

Grumpy gramps.

[Bobby Kelly]

Sup?

[Big J]

Was this day one.

[Bobby Kelly]

They won.

[Big J]

Wow.

[Bobby Kelly]

Excuse me.

[Big J]

Wow. Did something happen at, like, at the club at Miami? Did he get frustrated? Tim, you had him for, like, two extra days on your own?

[Christine]

No, he left with J. Oh, he came.

[Big J]

Left with you?

[Christine]

Just me and my wife trying to kill each other.

[Big J]

What do you mean? You're in Miami together?

[Christine]

We did Miami and in the boat together, but they left on Wednesday, and.

[Bobby Kelly]

I stayed, so we did Miami. We all got an Airbnb, so we stayed in Airbnb together.

[Big J]

But are you. You stayed on the boat longer?

[Christine]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Big J]

Oh, I didn't know that you left earlier.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. Tim stays till the end. Yeah, we got off okay, or else. Yeah. Then it would have been Foya and me both ruining Tim, and by the end, it would have been us ruining their time. It's like, you want to go watch a band? Like, I. Dude, I don't know. Like, yes.

[Tim Butterly]

What else did Mike do?

[Bobby Kelly]

I did. What else did Mike do?

[Big J]

Mike, can I give you a couple hundred bucks?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. No, he.

[Big J]

Mike, I set up massages for us this afternoon. You cool with that?

[Bobby Kelly]

Well, when he got off the boat, he had bad sea legs when he got off the boat, so the day off the boat, definitely. I was like, we just got fucked all around. We got off the boat, and then they were like. They made us get off kind of early, and then, like, the flight just kept getting delayed, like, by like, a half hour to an hour each time. So we ended up getting a hotel room by the thing.

[Tim Butterly]

Canceled, right?

[Bobby Kelly]

Had it canceled. The room then re. Got it again. The hotel.

[Big J]

Speak a tone.

[Bobby Kelly]

The hotel. And again, I've said, it's island shit. I guess people say, like, the. The laxadaisy effort. There was one other person, another couple, an older couple in the lobby. We weren't even Talked to for 30 minutes. Christine was on hold for 20 of those minutes on the phone. I'm already there. She was trying to call since before I got to the hotel. I'm there now, and they're holding. Finally, when they talked to me, I was like, hey, I think my girlfriend called and, like, set up a room for me here. And she was like, I gave the name. And she's like, no, no. And I go, she called. And she goes, oh, she's still on hold. I don't think she's made the thing yet. And I was like, oh, you? Yeah. She said she's been on hold for, like, a half hour. And the lady does this with her hand, like, she goes, yeah, no, I know, but I mean, like. And she does, like, the. Look at this lobby. She goes, yeah, but I'm slammed. I go, nothing is happening here.

[Big J]

I was.

[Tim Butterly]

For 20 minutes, I was just waiting to give her a credit card number, and I was like, wait, I think she picked up. I was like, I think you're taught. I was like, I think my boyfriend's standing in front of you.

[Bobby Kelly]

Me losing. Me. Almost. Almost crying at a point. Because then I was like, all right, we're. We're flying out Four, five hours past what we thought. We're sitting in the. This hotel room, by the way. It's a. It's called a resort. It's a fucking bungle. It's. It's a shitty place. This hotel is really bad.

[Tim Butterly]

It was a resort walkable to the airport.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, it was a shitty, shitty place. So we're in this. We're in this room watching, like, a P. Diddy documentary that came out on Peacock and just killing time. Mike says he's got sea legs, so he's in a bad mood. I, at one point, were both like. I go, hey, is there a restaurant at this hotel, this resort? No. Okay, can we, like, order food from somebody? Goes anywhere, Deliver? And she goes, yeah, Domino's. Like, she goes, domino's. I go, domino's Pizza. She's like, yeah, that's all it. Delivers. And I go, all right, well, can I get the number for that? And she gives it to me, and I go to the room, and I call and I go, hey, I need to get a delivery to. They go, we don't deliver. I went, no, no, this is Domino's Pizza, right? And they're like, yeah. I go, you don't deliver? And they go, no, we don't deliver. I go, domino's from the commercials. Like, Domino's. Because I think your entire thing is based on a delivery system you invented the 30 minutes or nest the noid. They fix the road sometimes in some of these shitty places, they made a real big deal about it.

[Big J]

They have robots.

[Bobby Kelly]

You have robots.

[Christine]

Pizza tracking software just for this.

[Big J]

There's an app.

[Bobby Kelly]

There's an app like, we don't deliver. I go, that's impossible. You've got to be broken off. There's no way you report that back to franchise headquarters, because they're not gonna be okay with that. So we had. I got a little bag. Because you also had to have dollar bills, which they did not have at the place. Yeah, but Mike had, like, two or three and I got a little bag of Cool Ranch Doritos, and he got a little thing of Fritos. And we watched P. Diddy and then got on a plane, frustrated, and went home. Home?

[Big J]

Really? Can I just say something? I don't. I don't think sea legs is a thing.

[Tim Butterly]

It is, it is, but not sitting down.

[Big J]

I don't think after you get off a boat, you can have sea legs.

[Bobby Kelly]

Absolutely.

[Christine]

The Miami airport felt like it was rocking.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, it's weird. No, dude, you've done a tour bus. You never got that when you get off a tour. But that actually scared me the first time I did a tour bus. No, not the first time, I guess, but when I was on that. That first corn tour. And we stopped after three days. The first three days we stopped at a hotel for the night night, and I was taking a. In the bathroom, and I thought I was gonna throw up because it just felt like the room was just, like, moving around.

[Big J]

I thought the sea legs were like, you know, the Nina, the Pinter, and the Santa Maria. You get sea legs. Not on a luxury cruise ship.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, you think it's like smallpox and scurvy. Yeah, just things you haven't heard of since pirate times.

[Big J]

No, I thought the boats was better now.

[Christine]

No way they. Dude, the boat was throwing around.

[Big J]

Oh, yeah. Well. So you had a good time? Nobody got. Got no big pod was great.

[Bobby Kelly]

We didn't really get to watch much other music.

[Christine]

I saw a bunch of other bands after you guys left.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. Yeah. You guys.

[Big J]

Wasn't there a band?

[Bobby Kelly]

You were here.

[Big J]

You were like. That was.

[Bobby Kelly]

That's what I wanted.

[Big J]

You wanted to.

[Christine]

Oh, my God, dude. I almost don't want to talk about this.

[Big J]

Why?

[Bobby Kelly]

I know you had one thing you were really looking forward to for months.

[Christine]

Six months of anticipation to see Buck Cherry and their dripping wet performance of crazy that they stretched to 12 minutes with this, like, slow jam pornographic soliloquy in the middle about having sex with a slut.

[Bobby Kelly]

A crazy bitch.

[Christine]

A crazy bitch. And I'd been. I basically was building the entire cruise around being there with my wife while this guy was making fuck noises and talking about getting his dick sucked.

[Bobby Kelly]

Part of my decision to get off the boat early lended itself to. Well, I want to give Tim and Mary Jo some time because they've made a promise to each other to be in mid coitus.

[Christine]

I.

[Bobby Kelly]

In audience.

[Christine]

I had. I had intended to climax just as he got to the point of. Of fucking this crazy bitch.

[Bobby Kelly]

In the song, semen comes out of your penis.

[Big J]

I know what that is.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, you're saying what I'm saying.

[Big J]

What, as in, like, holy shit, apologies. You can have sex with your wife.

[Christine]

My wife knew how important this was to me. Well, we saw them twice, actually. I saw Buck Cherry twice on one vote in the theater and on the deck. And first of all, they stretched the set to 90 minutes with a bunch of, like, really bullshit covers.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, they're more of a dome team. They're more of an indoor grass.

[Christine]

I mean, they were playing. They played the summer of 69. I don't know if that was like.

[Bobby Kelly]

A. I love that song, but that's. I don't need Buck charity.

[Christine]

It was a straightforward. No frills, no pizzazz, no polish cover.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Christine]

The summer of 69, they played like, I don't care.

[Bobby Kelly]

I love it.

[Christine]

Yeah. Changed. I love it, too.

[Big J]

Say it.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Christine]

You know.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. By the way. By the way, he is that guy. You could tell. And just listen to him talk. Talk. Oh, he's a guy. That's simplicity. That's simple. So we'll say instead his mind. He was like, we did something tonight.

[Christine]

His current. His current hot phrase right now is, can I get some omd? That's old man dick.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, jeez.

[Christine]

Yeah, dude. And so son of a.

[Bobby Kelly]

Stayed skinny, though, isn't it?

[Christine]

The set's not going great. It's. It's completely fluffed out. It sucks fucking dick.

[Bobby Kelly]

It was during the day also here.

[Big J]

So you're not hard at your wife.

[Christine]

This was Friday. The first. The first time I saw those. Wednesday in the theater pod.

[Bobby Kelly]

Okay.

[Christine]

And you'd know we're getting kind of antsy because it sucks so fucking bad.

[Big J]

And is the theater better than outside?

[Christine]

It depends. At night, outside was awesome.

[Bobby Kelly]

Nighttime, outside.

[Christine]

During the day, it kind of just felt like being at, like, a tailgate for too long.

[Bobby Kelly]

Were the stowaways great?

[Christine]

Yeah, they were fun. That's all the time. Yeah, they were fucking awesome. But Buck Cherry was doing the same thing. They were playing, like, covers. Yeah, we used dumb covers with no twist to it.

[Bobby Kelly]

It.

[Christine]

And so they save the crazy for last. And he's teasing it the whole time, and he's like, yeah, I know why y'all here? You want to hear the crazy? And they'd be like, yeah. And then he. He does a lot of, like, affectations that are, like, girly, sexy. So he'd be like, oh, yeah. She's like, I know y'all want to hear the crazy. They be, oh. He goes, oh, Stanley.

[Big J]

Sounds like Jacob working out.

[Tim Butterly]

He said, oh, yeah.

[Big J]

Come on, Lou. One more.

[Bobby Kelly]

Blasted my back. My glutes.

[Christine]

He said, you know, you were at a Buck Cherry concert when you hear that first. Yeah. So Wednesday night, we're in the theater and they finally get the crazy bitch and they start slowing it down and they're like working covers into it, you know, it's their whole thing. And he gets to the part where it's time to start, like, really laying it on. And I don't know if he was just bummed about performing on a cruise.

[Bobby Kelly]

Ship for the 15th time.

[Christine]

He just totally fucking phoned it in. He was like, you know, they slow it down. And he's like about to start his thing, and he's like, yeah, what? And he goes, are we having a good time? Shipwrecked? And they're just like, yeah. He goes, what's. What night is it? Is it Wednesday night? And they go, yeah, he goes. And then he starts freestyle rapping about it being Wednesday night night. The entire 10 minutes. He just goes, it's Wednesday night and tonight's tonight. And we're going.

[Bobby Kelly]

You have it. This is in the thing.

[Christine]

This is it. This is how he does crazy bits.

[Big J]

Wait, can I hear his rap again?

[Christine]

He goes, Wednesday night, and tonight's tonight, and we're going to do some drugs tonight. And it goes nowhere. Completely devoid.

[Bobby Kelly]

This is it.

[Christine]

Go ahead.

[Tim Butterly]

This video is only three minutes. I'm not sure how long the whole thing was.

[Christine]

I guarantee everyone that was waiting for it started recording and when they heard it's Wednesday night and we're in the spot, they all put their phones down. Oh, yeah.

[Big J]

He does look good, though.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yes.

[Christine]

Mary Jo said he moves like Joe Biden.

[Big J]

This is Joe derosa's dream.

[Tim Butterly]

Is he a drug addict?

[Bobby Kelly]

I just feel like one.

[Christine]

According to his songs, according to everything he's ever written.

[Bobby Kelly]

I was gonna ask, did he do Lit Up?

[Christine]

I like that.

[Big J]

Cocaine.

[Christine]

I love that.

[Bobby Kelly]

That's the best song.

[Christine]

Open with that.

[Tim Butterly]

That's the best one.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, that's their best song.

[Christine]

So, yeah, they completely. I mean, it just was such a massive disappointment. It was the only blemish on the entire 10 day trip.

[Tim Butterly]

I mean, it looks pretty good to me. I mean, looks like an experience to me.

[Christine]

Oh, for sure. And you know, we got to feel stupid about it, and that was fine. But then.

[Bobby Kelly]

Hang on. Did you lose giving me sign language? You want to finger my ass in a circular motion? What do you think? That's gonna get some stuff out? Yeah, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Christine]

I know he did insert some like sexual stuff here and there. He told a song about a babysitter that you wanted to have sex with. And he said, this song's about a big tits and a fat ass. And the guitar player gets on the mic, he goes, hey man, there's kids in the front.

[Bobby Kelly]

Really big tits and a fat ass. I'm talking, of course, about my lovely wife, Tim Butterly. Check out the Tim Butterly show. And you can check out dad Meat, available wherever you listen to podcasts and YouTube, both on YouTube.

[Tim Butterly]

Also, I love it's not. It's Tim Butterley's show.

[Bobby Kelly]

Tim Buttery show.

[Christine]

I'm not picky. Don't worry about it.

[Big J]

Tim Butterly show.

[Bobby Kelly]

I like that. Tim Butterly's show and dad Meet available wherever you listen to and get podcasts. Tim's also going to be at Wise Guys in Las Vegas March 7th and 8th. For tickets and all of his tour dates go to timbutterly.com and of course, Robert Kelly's going to be a governor's Levittown, New York, February 7th and 8th. My ex wife's asking to open for you. I would say no, but you don't care. Of course after that he's going to be in Naples, Philadelphia and Denver. I say she's a horrible devil w lady. But you love her.

[Big J]

I'm good.

[Bobby Kelly]

You love her so hard.

[Big J]

I love everybody.

[Bobby Kelly]

And every Tuesday night you can catch Bobby at the Fat Black Cat Lounge, the comedy seller. And to make sure you get his tickets for that at Punchup Live, Robert Kelly and Guru's YouTube Robert Kelly comedy.

[Big J]

Big J's gonna be at the Funny Bone, Orlando, February 7th and 8th and Syracuse, February 14th and 15th. After that, Los Angeles, Ontario, California, Indianapolis, Baltimore for tickets and all the dates. Big J comedy.com guys, we'll be right back.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, we won't.

[Big J]

We're done. Have a great day, Timmy.

[Bobby Kelly]

Thank you.

[Tim Butterly]

Tim.

[Big J]

Good to see you, buddy.

[Bobby Kelly]

Thanks for having me.

[Christine]

Bobby, it was great to see you again.

[Big J]

Good to see you, buddy.

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[Christine]

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[Bobby Kelly]

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