Skankfest New Orleans 2025

Summary

The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly
Episode: Skankfest New Orleans 2025 (Live Recording)
Date: December 4, 2025

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Overview

Live from Skankfest in New Orleans, Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly bring the raucous, uncensored energy of The Bonfire to a crowd of over 2,500 die-hard fans. The episode captures the wild spirit of Skankfest: crowd banter, backstage secrets, stand-up scene gossip, and off-the-rails crowd work, all while poking at each other's insecurities and celebrating the tight-knit, dysfunctional comedy community. The show features many fan-favorite regulars and surprise drop-ins, with lots of candid discussions about festival debauchery, performer camaraderie, and personal quirks.

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Key Discussion Points and Insights

Skankfest Atmosphere & Crowd Energy

• Opening at Skankfest: Jay marvels at the crowd size, immediately launching into irreverent crowd work.
  • “Boy, this crowd's hot. 25 Honda deep.” (02:13, Jay)
• Both Jay and Bobby riff on the clothing and “costume-level” authenticity of the New Orleans crowd.
  • “I love that dressed up at Skank Fest is just as characters...No one's wearing a suit. Yeah. Why would you wear a suit here? Dude, you're gonna get puking. Come on. You from somebody.” (05:03, Jay)

Festival Antics & Notorious Incidents

• Skankfest Shenanigans: They discuss wild happenings, including public nudity and boundary-pushing acts.
  • “Ellie Stockholm was just walking around with her tits out." (03:03, Jay)
  • “Zach sat with his tits on this couch for four and a half hours last night.” (03:09, Jay)
  • There’s talk of a comic (Zach) kissing another performer’s penis as a display of festival excess.
    • “He kissed another man's penis last night.” (03:34, Bobby)
    • “That’s not...When he did it...15 people in 2500 went ‘that.’” (03:42, Jay)
• Both hosts debate the social implications for the “kissee” versus the “kisser” in these festival stunts.

Crowd Interaction & Insanely Personal Banter

• Tattoo stories: A crowd member reveals a detailed Louisiana tattoo on her butt, prompting a string of filthy jokes about Katrina, geography, and local pride.
  • “You have a Louisiana tattooed on your ass?” (05:37, Bobby)
  • “Buyer pussy is the flood zone.” (06:13, Bobby)
• Jay and Bobby poke fun at regional stereotypes, crowd members’ professions, and even personal grooming.

Crew Introductions & In-Show Family Dynamics

• Introducing the Team: The hosts bring out their Bonfire crew, each one greeted with inside jokes and playful jabs.
  • Black Lou’s appearance, met with a quick and racy observational riff.
    • “Oh man, you guys didn't guess he was so black.” (08:13, Jay)
  • Christine Evans (producer and festival organizer), is pulled up, complimented, and then roasted for her fashion and festival role.
    • “Yo, it's like listening to two bitches talk.” (10:41, Jay)
    • “Christine, she bones you up nice...Jacob says festival Christine could get it.” (10:58, Jay)
  • DJ Lou honored for attending Skankfest sober for the first time (11:16).
  • Chris Rogers (live artist) and Paco (filmmaker, resident butt of jokes) introduced with references to their festival escapades and willingness for humiliation.
    • “Paco, why do you have such an iron stomach that you're able to sustain swallowing spit from another man and all of his innards?” (13:35, Jay)

Rides, Vomit, and the Skankfest Midway

• Festival rides are discussed, with plenty of gross-out stories from the past.
  • “I'll go again on the fucking Roundup.” (14:22, Jay)
  • Bobby recounts a childhood ride ending with collective vomiting: "It went and it went around and everybody got a little spittle of puke..." (14:39, Bobby)

Comedy, Sexuality, and the Festival “Line”

• Flirtations and Fidelity: Jay presses Bobby about his marriage’s limits regarding “flirtation” and festival temptation.
  • “Where's the flirting stop for you? Can you suck a tit?” (16:49, Jay)
  • Bobby admits: “I can't put two tits together and suck them, but one tit at a time.” (16:56, Bobby)

Nipple Preferences and Body Positivity

• A full segment is spent on breast/nipple typologies and sexual preferences.
  • “I like the nipple that just fades into the tit...A big, chubby girl nipple, you know what I mean?” (19:26-19:32, Bobby)
  • “I had a girl one time....She took them out and they unfolded.” (18:29, Bobby)

Festival Fight Recap

• The much-hyped Skankfest “fight” is recapped in detail.
  • Harrington wins handily.
  • “He was blocking with his face mostly...I'm gonna get him a dermatologist. I think for some of those, it's bad if they change, right?” (20:38-20:53, Jay)
• Physical comedy continues with quips about back moles and fight stoppages.

Skankfest’s Diversity (or Lack Thereof)

• Jokes about the racial makeup of the attendees:
  • “Is he the only Asian in this place?...There’s four guys getting together for a dim sum tomorrow.” (21:28-21:36, Jay)
  • “No, every year it's gotten less [Black attendees].” (45:59, Bobby)

Fan Participation and Paco’s Breakdancing

• Paco is goaded into dancing on stage, “Nothing drops panties for a disappointing Asian penis like breakdancing.” (27:38, Jay)
• The running joke about “Fat Paco” and ‘fatter you’ spins out.

Surprise Guests & Candid Interviews

• Joe DeRosa enters: He laughs about his history at the festival, hard partying, and wild on-stage sexual encounters, saying the key is to “just turn it on and trust the process.” (28:16, DeRosa)
  • Jay reminds him of being “jacked off by a trans [woman] last year...on a show two years ago. Two years ago. Sorry.” (29:50, Jay)
• “Trans Carrie” is brought on stage—unplanned, but ends up in a gloriously unfiltered discussion about comic crushes and sexuality.
  • “If you would a girl, would it be Joe DeRosa?” (31:02, Jay)
  • “So do you like...is there any comics you think are hot?...I love Jim Norton.” (31:26, Carrie)
  • “Why...What is the attract...Do you like worms that live in apples?” (31:38, Bobby)
  • “He looks like a post op vagina.” (31:46, Jay)
  • The group constructs an extremely detailed imaginary sexual scenario involving Carrie and DeRosa, complete with positional choreography and ‘game of Twister’ analogies. (34:55+)
• Carrie is grilled on her preferences: she ranks Jay “first,” Joe second, Bobby third (“Sorry, Bobby, I'd go with Joe.” 37:57, Carrie).

Onstage Friction and Behind-the-Scenes Conflict

• Jacob and Bobby’s “fight”: The running tension between producer Jacob and Bobby is aired aloud, including reports of a real argument in the hotel.
  • “I've heard more than one people outside of the hotel be like, Bobby and Jacob...” (39:03, Jay)
  • “Jacob gets very nervous and...he's like, ‘Bobby, when are we gonna...’ And I'm like, dude, we'll figure it out. We'll figure it out.” (39:29, Bobby)

Special Drop-Ins and Emotional Notes

• Shane Gillis, Tim Butterly, Yamanika, and others: The show balloons with additional comics and regulars on stage for spontaneous crowd bits and personal reflection.
• Yamanika jokes about being the only Black person and plans a “Black History Month show here one day.” (46:04, Yamanika)
• Bobby thanks the fans for the festival’s positive, welcoming atmosphere: “Even when we have to deal with the shit online, no one's ever come out and been disrespectful to me here. Nothing but love and kindness.” (45:48, Bobby)
• The hosts and guests reminisce about festival performances, rides, inside jokes, and how marginalized they are—yet find family in the Skankfest community.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Festival Excess:

  • “He kissed another man's penis last night.” (03:34, Bobby)
  • “That’s not...When he did it...15 people in 2500 went ‘that.’” (03:42, Jay)

• On the Skankfest Vibe:

  • “Dressed up at Skank Fest is just as characters...You're gonna get puking...from somebody.” (05:03, Jay)
  • “Riding that roundup ride. The fights have been great. The fights have been fun as...” (20:13, Jay)

• On Personal Boundaries:

  • “Where's the flirting stop for you? Can you suck a tit?” (16:49, Jay)
  • “One tit. Kiss it like a child.” (17:06, Bobby)

• On Crowd Diversity:

  • “Is he the only Asian in this place?...There’s four guys getting together for a dim sum tomorrow.” (21:28-21:36, Jay)
  • “No, every year it's gotten less [Black attendees].” (45:59, Bobby)

• On Crew Contributions:

  • “It's not just me and Bobby...where’s our...the reason we're all allowed to laugh in the room...Black Lou.” (07:59, Jay)
  • “Christine, she bones you up nice...Jacob says festival Christine could get it.” (10:58, Jay)

• On Wild Sexual Hypotheticals:

  • “How big’s your wienis?” (33:54, Bobby)
  • “Would you treat it like a vagina or would you treat it like a...?” (34:15, Bobby)
  • “A game of gay Twister.” (36:31, Bobby describing the sexual scenario)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• [02:00] – Jay and Bobby welcome the crowd, launch into Skankfest talk
• [03:00 – 04:00] – Tit sightings (or lack thereof) and recounting of onstage hijinks
• [05:00 – 06:00] – Riffing on crowd attire, “white trash” jokes, tattoo banter
• [07:59 – 12:28] – Introduction of the Bonfire crew and their roles at Skankfest
• [14:22 – 14:50] – Classic vomit-on-the-roundup story
• [16:49 – 19:45] – Open discussion of marriage boundaries, sexual hypotheticals, and in-depth nipple chat
• [20:13 – 21:14] – Skankfest celebrity boxing match recap
• [21:28 – 22:11] – Crowd demographic jokes; “only Asian in the place”
• [27:03 – 27:44] – Paco’s breakdancing moment
• [28:02 – 36:31] – Joe DeRosa segment, trans guest (Carrie), comic sexuality, and elaborate group sexual act-out
• [39:03 – 40:19] – Bobby and Jacob’s Skankfest backstage “fight”
• [41:26 – 49:58] – Guest drop-ins, Yamanika’s “Black History Month” riff, festival community warmth, more ride and puke stories
• [50:04 – end] – Show wraps with thank-yous, references to future rides, and last rounds with guests

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Tone and Language

The episode is full of raw, raucous, irreverent humor. Jay and Bobby are relentlessly self-deprecating, irreverent, and inclusive in their own wild, anything-goes comedic style—putting both themselves and everyone else at the center of the joke. The language is blue, conversational, and fast-paced, true to their live-in-the-moment vibe.

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Final Impressions

This episode of The Bonfire at Skankfest New Orleans is a quintessential snapshot of modern festival comedy culture: boundary-pushing, inclusive in its own wild way, and bursting with spontaneous live moments. For fans and newcomers alike, it’s a reminder that, inside the chaos and crude jokes, there’s a community of misfits creating catharsis through laughter and camaraderie.

Transcript

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Ladies and gentlemen, Big J Okerson and Robert Kelly acknowledge the city of New Orleans is situated on the unceded traditional territory of bulbancha or.

[A]

Place of many tongues.

[B]

They honor the chitimacha and other nations who have been caretakers of this land for centuries.

[A]

Thank you.

[B]

And now the bonfire live from skank fest New Orleans with Big J Okerson and Robert Kelly.

[A]

So skank fest.

Welcome to the bonfire live from skank fest, everyone. SiriusXM Faction Talk 103. I'm Big J Ogrison. That is the great Robert Kelly.

Boy, this crowd's hot. 25 Honda deep.

Jacob's his pants.

[B]

Yeah, Jacob been panicking for four months. Look at little Paco. Look, a little Filipino Paco run by.

[A]

He really committed to that train car. Asian look good God. Thank you guys all for being here. Man, this is an Amazing. Are you guys having an amazing skank fest so far?

Everyone's getting laid.

You think? Who's not gotten laid? Just fucking sad dudes.

[B]

I haven't seen. I haven't even seen a tit.

[A]

What?

[B]

I haven't seen. I saw Yamaneke's tit in the back.

[A]

What?

[B]

I thought I'd see more tits at Skankfest.

[A]

You haven't seen a tit?

[B]

I haven't seen a tit.

[A]

There's one. Ellie Stockholm was just walking around with her tits out.

[B]

I haven't seen a tit. What? Like a one on one tit?

[A]

Like, Zach sat with his tits on this couch for four and a half hours last night.

[B]

That was a. I was here for that.

[A]

That was crazy.

[B]

I was watching Zach die.

[A]

Yeah. Was that unraveling? Was that a person unraveling? What the hell happened?

[B]

He actually turned a different shade of green while he was up there.

[A]

Everything's so beautiful. We're watching Zach die in real time. Oh, yeah.

[B]

He kissed another man's penis last night.

That's not.

[A]

By the way.

That's something. When he did it, he was like. Whenever that comes up there, I was gonna cheer like, yo, that was nuts. Remember, Zach did that. And 15 people and 2500 went.

That.

[B]

Was the guy who got his dick kissed.

[A]

That's. Why is the guy who got his dick kissed here? Oh, it was a comic.

[B]

It was a comic. That is the worst to be. It's not bad for Zach, the kiss.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Just walk by confident. Anyways, it's G, Mike.

[A]

He plays by his own rules.

[B]

He walked by like he owned the place. Yeah. The guy who got his dick kiss. I think it's worse for him. You know what I mean? Zach. Zach kissing a dick is like, all right, I get it. Oh, this guy has a family.

[A]

Oh, he's a guy who's had his dick kissed.

[B]

That's worse.

[A]

So therefore, he's got to face life in a different way.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

No, but you could always show the picture of who kissed your dick and be like, this fucking goofball clown.

Yeah. He was painted green. What, am I gonna not let him kiss my dick? It was out.

[B]

It was not the dick I would have kissed. By the way, if you had to.

[A]

Kiss a dick at this festival, who would it be? Let's go to the callers.

[B]

Both of our dicks. You have to push our belly buttons so they'll pop out.

[A]

What? No, don't say that to people out loud. I told you that was pillow talk. Dude.

These guys are Dressed up. I like the fucking crowd here at Skank Fest. They come for the fucking festival.

[B]

I love. I love that dressed up at Skank Fest is just as characters.

[A]

Yeah, that's what I mean. Yeah. No one's wearing a suit. Yeah. Why would the fuck would you wear a suit here? Dude, you're gonna get puking. Come on. You from somebody.

What's this? Look, White trash. Is that the theme? Joe Dirt? I was like, what is it? White trash? And they were like, we're not wearing costumes, dude. Off.

[B]

They're just from New Orleans.

[A]

These are my short shorts.

[B]

Are you from here? Do you guys fucking hunt gator and shit like that now? What do you do? You do any weird shit? You ever show your tits?

I'm talking to him, honey. Back out of this. I have a standard Louisiana tattooed on my ass.

[A]

You have a Louisiana tattooed on your ass?

[B]

On your ass?

[A]

Why?

[B]

What part of your ass?

[A]

What are you, a fucking black NFL player?

[B]

My whole left cheek, Right cheek. Really? The whole state? Yes, really. Can we see it? I guess.

[A]

She has a wave and in the middle of it she has a wave and a pile of dead black people on Katrina.

No, it's good. I don't agree with the artwork, but it is the detail work. No, shut up. The line work. Do you guys even care about tattoos?

[B]

Buyer pussy is the flood zone.

[A]

That'd be great if you could squirt a Katrina on your own fucking butt tattoo.

[B]

If all your jizz came out of Ward 5.

[A]

Hear me out, dude. Fucker. Pile driver style. And then fucking. Really dig in there for that squirt and let it fucking wave over one part.

[B]

There's a star he aims for.

[A]

There's a star he aims for.

[B]

Yeah. Was it J for New Orleans? Where New Orleans is.

[A]

It's in New Orleans. That's where you have the star and you try to come on the star.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That's not a lot of cum.

Are you Jewish also? No. Is that a Jewish star on your arm? No. Huh? No, it's not. What is it?

Just a sign? No, on that side. Doesn't look like a Jewish star. Am I crazy?

[B]

Let's see it real quick.

[A]

That's you trying to deny your Judaism here.

[B]

No, that's a fidget spinner. Very. It's a smiley face flower. And it's not even a real tattoo.

[A]

Eh. It's not a real tattoo. You can put on press on tattoos on this guy.

[B]

You guys aren't. You probably have a fucking Bernda Doodle. You have all kinds of shit you're not even real rednecks, are you? No.

[A]

You guys don't even fucking belong here. Get these fuckers out of here. I bet your pussy hair doesn't even go down your legs like a lot of the girls here.

[B]

Hello. You wear slip ons with no socks, don't you? I have a master's degree and I work in a master's degree.

[A]

I work in IT for fighting, trying not to take meth this weekend.

[B]

I work in hr.

[A]

You work in hr? You fired half this crowd.

[B]

Hey, these two. These two chubby guys, get them the fuck out.

[A]

You too. You can see down there tired. Seeing him down there is making me think we need to introduce our fucking crew. We got our crew in the house here at the bonfire. Everybody comes out.

It's not just me and Bobby. We brought it out. Where's our illustrious. The reason we're all allowed to laugh in the room. Black Lou. Where you at, Black Lou? Where's Black Lou?

[B]

Here he comes.

[A]

Yeah. What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up?

Oh, man, you guys didn't guess he was so black. When you hear him.

They do.

We have our. Where is he? Where's our.

[B]

He's right over there.

[A]

Where is he? He's right behind the curtain.

[B]

Wait.

[A]

Oh, he wants to come out on stage. Oh, he's gonna do a stage. Oh, okay. Everybody. You know him and love him. How could you not? Everyone. The mousiest little guy in the whole land. It's everyone's favorite. Jacob B.

[B]

Oh, shit.

[A]

You're gonna cry?

[B]

Yeah. How's it make you feel, Jacob? I mean, it feels pretty good.

[A]

Put Jacob's microphone on. What's that?

[B]

No, it's on, Jay.

[A]

Oh. Oh, sorry. Yeah, it feels pretty good. Pretty good project, dude. There's 2,500 people here staring at you.

[B]

Okay.

I mean, I don't. Yeah, it feels great to be here. I don't know what to say, Jay.

[A]

All right.

[B]

Jesus Christ. How about, I'm afraid Bobby's gonna be upset?

[A]

You think Bobby's gonna be upset?

[B]

Why? Well, you've been. We'll get into this in a few minutes.

[A]

Oh, Jesus.

[B]

Something we got to talk about. He's got me on edge. No, you.

[A]

Bobby's got you on edge.

[B]

You got me. All right, we'll talk about it in a few minutes.

[A]

We gotta introduce everybody. Don't be sticking the mud.

[B]

You got the person that none of this would happen. You wouldn't be here unless she did all the hard work.

Christine Evans, everybody.

There she fucked up her intro. She's taking a sip of Diet Coke. Christine, get up here.

She was drinking a soda.

[A]

The fuck are you doing?

[B]

There she is.

Christine Evans.

[A]

She brings you Skank Fest with Rebecca and Lewis.

[B]

Look how beautiful you are. You look so good. You look great. Your hair is great. The outfit's great. I love the little Gucci Uchi your bag, slut. It is Gucci. It is Gucci. I got it secondhand, but it's Gucci.

[A]

Yo, it's like listening to two bitches talk.

Christine Evans, everybody. You know, you know what she does.

[B]

General Christine is sexy.

[A]

Huh?

[B]

General Christine is sexy.

[A]

General Christine. Yes. Oh, and she's like working the festival.

[B]

Christine.

[A]

Yeah, I know, dude. She bones you up nice. Yeah. Jacob says festival Christine could get it.

[B]

She is.

[A]

And the show, the bonfire, of course, doesn't happen or you would like it much less if he wasn't here. Everyone, for the first year, stone sober at Skank Fest.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

The great DJ Lou returns.

[B]

If you suck my pussy, baby, I'll suck your dick. I'll do it to you, honey, till I make you shit.

[A]

She's a pig.

[B]

Make them say.

[A]

Hell yeah.

[B]

Yo.

Stone sober.

[A]

I had no idea that Jacob was no limit, man. That's crazy. Jacob's a no limit soldier. Also, it doesn't get set enough here because he's been doing it all weekend. But the amazing artist, Chris Rogers always live painting out.

[B]

I love it. I love it.

You were about to announce Chris and Paco thought you were gonna say his name. Paco. Give it up for Paco, everybody. Come here.

[A]

Also Paco.

[B]

Paco.

[A]

But Chris didn't even get his full thing. You gave Paco in the middle of.

[B]

Chris's thing because Paco almost cried.

[A]

Paco, hang in there.

Chris Rogers, everybody. The amazing artist.

And yeah, dude, fucking Filipino all star Paco. Everyone makes a noise for Paco.

He cuts his hair super Asiany so we can laugh at him.

[B]

Dude, when you started announcing Chris, Paco's eyebrows went up and he started to muster up like he had to make a speech.

[A]

That was Rocky 5, remember? In the ring, Rocky 5. I want to thank someone who was a angel on my shoulder. Chris Rogers, the artist. You Paco. Boo boo.

Paco is a part of the bonfire. He comes in every week to film us with his Johnny's talents. He'll do anything you want. He's.

Drink.

[B]

Oh, man. What the was that?

[A]

It's. I'm thinking about it. Dude, he drank.

[B]

You haven't done fat guy in around eight months.

You had late night burgers, didn't you?

[A]

No, I didn't. No, it's. I'm thinking about when Paco spit.

[B]

Dude, you.

[A]

Oh, dude, you spit coffee in the Paco's mouth and he. But just swallowed it.

[B]

Yeah, that's actually gayer than Zach kissing that guy's dick.

[A]

It definitely tells you how bad Filipino food must be.

Paco, why do you have such an iron stomach that you're able to sustain like swallowing spit from another man and all of his innards? One of them had mouthwash in it. Do you remember that? Do you go home and throw up afterwards? You just keep it down. And then what? Just shit it out with all the fish heads and other nonsense. She eat.

Fish head? 11 toothpicks. Oh, there's Bobby's mouthwash.

[B]

Don't forget my zins.

[A]

You fucking zins are gross as shit. What's been your favorite part of the festival so far? I saw you riding a Ferris wheel with Mike Fig. So that's safe.

So that rides to safe. I did.

[B]

I ride. I rode the Ferris wheel last night. It was. It was fun. Nobody's riding the fucking rides. I like the rides.

[A]

I tell you, I wrote on the Roundup. I'll go again. I'll go right after this show. Again on the fucking Roundup.

[B]

I'm not going on the Roundup. I was on the Roundup as a little kid and one of the kids puked and it just hit all of.

[A]

Us in the face on the Roundup. Supposed to fucking whack. Should hit you right back. Maybe the person there.

[B]

Dude, it went and it went around and everybody got a little spittle of puke and then it smelled like puke. And then we all puked at Canobie Lake in New Hampshire. It's a. Fuck. What's up, motherfucker?

[A]

Is this a short story you wrote in high school? That sounds crazy. Crazy what?

[B]

You know what I'm talking about. The Turkish twist. Yeah, baby. I don't do the. I don't like spinny rides. I like rides that do this.

[A]

Dude, that guy's an old school Patriots fan. Look at that right there. You're a big Patriots fan. Dude, talk to Bobby. Oh, you know what? It's fair. It's football Sundays tomorrow. Talk to Bobby about the upcoming game and what's going to happen in it.

[B]

You're an asshole, you know that?

[A]

Listen, you're a big Patriots fan, right?

[B]

They put me on Thursday.

[A]

Dude, talk to Bobby about the game and what happened.

[B]

It's called the by.

[A]

No, this is not fair. Get over here, sir. Stand up, please. If you wouldn't mind. If you wouldn't mind standing up for me and just have a little back and forth. Bobby, about the game. I'm smoking a joint anyway. It's fine.

[B]

What's up, dude? It was Drake May, right? Yeah, Drake May, the quarterback. He's kicking ass this year. Very unexpected. We didn't think he was going to do that.

[A]

Good.

[B]

Games have been close, but the last couple of games, fucking nailing it 100%.

[A]

100%.

[B]

100%. Throws a lot of interception, though. He's got to get that under control. He's not number 12.

[A]

Bobby, tell him. What was your favorite part of the game on Thursday?

[B]

Part of the game on Thursday was the. The D route that he threw.

That was to the touchdown. The D route to the touchdown.

[A]

Was to the touchdown.

[B]

Yeah, to the touchdown.

[A]

All right, Bobby, I know you understand football words. I didn't know you were going to fucking fall to pieces on me. Yeah, they did the. They ran through the line where the end. Where the end of it is.

[B]

I don't like that a man with fingernail polish and eyeshadow is fucking with me about sports.

[A]

I'm so confident, my masculinity.

Sure, I wear nail polish, but I lays down that dick. You know what I'm talking about, dude in the green.

Dick. I can tell. I lays that dick.

Bob, you still laze that dick. I bet. Does it suck for you that you're married and you can't even have wonderful flirtations with all of the sluts throwing themselves at you here?

[B]

No, I've had some flirtations. I can flirt. It's not a bad thing.

[A]

Where's the flirting stop for you? Can you suck a tit?

[B]

Yeah, I think I could suck a tit. Depends.

[A]

You can suck a tit.

[B]

Depends on how I suck it. I can. I can't put two tits together and suck them, but one tit at a time.

[A]

Your marriage is fine.

[B]

I'm fine. I.

[A]

One tit.

[B]

One tit. Kiss it like a child.

[A]

No, no, that's too intimate, dude. I say maybe if you do like a. Like a. Like a milking motion where it gets funny. Like. Like.

[B]

No, I can't.

[A]

He goes, oh, I was in the moment. Everyone was laughing. The titties were out.

[B]

But, like, I can't turn into a monkey. I can't do that.

[A]

Well, that wasn't a tit. That was a. In your mouth. What was that? Pantomime? That was muscle memory. No. What the hell was that?

[B]

That's not how you suck tits.

[A]

That's not how I do it. No, Bobby, that's not how I probably do it. I'm a two hand. A lot of base work. And then just like a thumb under the helmet thing.

[B]

Do you bite? Do you bite the nipple or do you. Do you bite the nipple? A little bit and a little gnar on it.

[A]

Oh, the chick. I'll throw back on that.

I'm sorry, do I bite a chick's nipple? A little bit?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah, Like a soft little bit. No, not like that. What are you doing? Trying to saw it off.

[B]

I call this the Hellraiser.

[A]

Yeah. Here's the noise you never want to hear when you're fucking.

Do you bite nips?

[B]

I do this.

[A]

I bite them on the side like a cigar. Go like.

[B]

I had a girl.

[A]

That way I can look up at them like this. Side eyes. Yeah, you want to do the other one?

[B]

I had a girl. I had a girl one time, really thin blonde girl, hot. And we got. We were getting in bed to fuck and she goes, I want to tell you something. I got weird nipples. I was like, what are you talking about? They're big. I was like, they're fine. She took them out and they unfolded.

[A]

Like a. Oh, my God.

[B]

Like. Like one of those things in front of the car salesman place.

[A]

No, but here's the thing.

[B]

It looked like little light switches, but.

[A]

Oh, but it came on like.

[B]

Dude.

[A]

But did it come alive like when you. Like when you open an air mattress. Yeah, you let it like. Yeah. It breathe and then like it becomes nipple.

[B]

And then they just stood up. And I was freaked out for a couple of minutes, but then I liked them a lot. I like that.

[A]

Really?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You got to chew on those bad boys. Probably can't feel the last half inch.

[B]

I put one in my ear and I just fucked my ear.

[A]

I assume if a girl's nipples are too big, the ends of them must be chafed to shit. Just raw. Like fucking weightlifting calluses.

[B]

I like. I like the nipple that just fades into the tit. Oh, you know what I mean?

[A]

Yeah. Like a child.

[B]

A big, chubby girl nipple, you know what I mean? Where it just got so big. It mushed out the nipple, too.

[A]

Like it was supposed to be a small tit. Yeah. But it fatly stretched the nipple out over a small tit to be a big tit.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

It's like, this is everyone. The crowd just hit too hard to home. And here everyone's like, all right, we're doing the best we can with what we got motherfucker. Okay. I thought, this is like Juggalos. We're supposed to all feel sexy here.

Me and Bobby throwing stones. Look at all these fat pigs. Right? High five. If you're lucky, I'll let you suck my dick.

[B]

What's your favorite part so far?

[A]

That last thing I just did about let everybody suck my dick.

I liked riding that roundup ride. The fights have been great. The fights have been fun as.

[B]

Who won the fight, by the way?

[A]

Harrington won the fight.

[B]

He did?

[A]

Yeah. Pretty decidedly, like, convincingly. Pretty fucking convincingly, yeah. Jake was in another world and he was blocking with his face mostly.

Then he threw a couple body shots, and then they would hug a lot. And I think he would get tripped out by the amount of back moles Harrington has. And I don't say you should go to see a doctor, but I'm gonna get him a dermatologist. I think for some of those, it's bad if they change, right?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I thought I saw them change in the fight.

One of them grew hair during the fight.

[B]

It got older.

[A]

Yeah, but no, Harrington won pretty easily, it looked like. I mean, but they went through the third round. It was pretty great. Then they stopped it. Paco stopped it. I say early stoppage.

[B]

Did he stop it with a spinning back fist and a ha cha.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. He went, no, no, no. It goes, trouble, trouble, trouble. Up ahead.

[B]

Indiana, you guys don't fight. We love each other. It's Ganga fans.

[A]

Everybody don't fight. Everybody dance. They just suck up there doing a weird thing.

[B]

Is he the only Asian in this place?

[A]

Huh?

[B]

Yeah. I haven't seen one other Asian here. There's four guys getting together for a dim sum tomorrow.

[A]

Yeah, What'd you guys all meet in the dojo stage?

You've seen the four other Asians? Do you guys do something when you see each other?

You bow. Get the out of here. That'd be great.

[B]

I love a bow.

[A]

Have you met them, actually? What are their names? Any good Asiany ones? You called one Fat or you, I.

[B]

Know you're talking about. No, I know you talk about. I saw him. I literally.

[A]

Oh, I know. Fatter you. He's from Austin, I think.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Oh, fatter. You's gotta be here.

[B]

Yeah, Fat of you is here, black.

[A]

Well, you're scaring the out of this white hillbilly in front of you.

You guys never seen a durag before without a gun in his face two seconds later. Hey, son, you got extra tickets for that Saints game?

[B]

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[A]

Zoe. This thing weighs a ton. Drewski, live with your legs man.

[B]

Santa. Santa, did you get my letter?

[A]

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[B]

No, there's just one guy that his friend said like, oh, you're just a fatter Paco. So that's, I met him, he's like, I'm fat Paco.

[A]

And then what did you guys fight?

[B]

I said, oh, that sucks, dude.

Good one.

[A]

Yeah. Wow.

[B]

Wow. Really lit up the crowd on that story.

[A]

I know, but you know, make something up. Something Chinese happened. Then we met on the fucking battleground. We fought in that Karate Kid 2 castle.

[B]

Yeah, do a flip in front of the stage.

[A]

Do a flip, dude. Do that dance move. I love that you do dance. Paco.

[B]

Paco, come out here and dance.

[A]

Paco, get up here and dance for people.

[B]

Come over here. And dance.

[A]

Paco. You'll do anything. Get up here and dance.

[B]

Paco.

[A]

Paco. Oh, you. Paco. You get off the stage and come around the stairs. Don't make me and Bobby feel like shit. You fucking cunt piece of you.

[B]

Oh my God. Look who I see. Look who's over there in the wings with just an angry face.

[A]

Oh, Cr.

[B]

It's not Jacob.

[A]

It's Paco.

[B]

No, Paco.

[A]

Dance for everybody for a second.

For 10 seconds straight.

Nothing drops panties for a disappointing Asian penis like breakdancing.

[B]

He just lost his phone in the drum.

[A]

Oh, I thought he was still doing the worm.

[B]

That really bugs me that you can do that.

[A]

Paco. Jump flip off the stage, dude.

[B]

Oh, I hate that.

[A]

Everybody. Who do I spy with my little eye? Is it the man himself? Joe Derosa in the house.

[B]

Joey.

[A]

Coming out to hang with you boys. Thank you. Hi, guys. Hey, buddy. Go away. Skagg Fest nothing. It's a always a pleasure to be here on the. It should have been me show the.

[B]

Yeah, well, you should. You should have been nice at A. J.

[A]

You sound. I don't miss the six figure a year salary to come out once a year for seven minutes at Skagfest. Oh, it is nice you're getting six figures. No, no, no. How are you guys? We're doing good. Are you enjoying the festival? You're like one of the princes of this festival every year. I love this festival. I love all the skanks meeting all of you. You guys are fucking amazing. This is a beautiful experience. You've had a sexual awakening at this festival. You've had so many legendary moments. What's gonna happen? How do you turn it up this year? You don't turn it up. You don't turn it up. You just turn it on and trust the process. That's the problem with Pink Floyd. They kept going. They should have stopped after the wall. That's it. Yeah. No more. I know when I had a hit record. So that's it? No more boozing? No, I'm boozing. No more hard drugs. No.

[B]

I think Joe is the only one of the only comics that does the festival right. Because you get fucking trashed.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You get as fucked up as them.

[A]

God help this 8:00pm show I'm on.

[B]

Yeah, he's been drinking since four. I took two naps today.

[A]

Two naps? That's elderly. Look at. You're smoking a full joint, drinking a white claw. You're. You're doing it. I'm not judging you. No, no. I'm not saying judgment I'm saying you're. You're putting it in. Yeah, but. No, but I'm not. You'll go hard.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I keep talking to a fucking microphone. I like it about you, dude. I like it about you, dude. You got jacked off by a trans last year on a show two years ago. Two years ago. Sorry.

[B]

And last year. But not on a show and then last year.

[A]

But that was just for funsies. Why does it have to stop two years ago? I don't think it does, dude. Are there trans here this year? There's got to be. There's been accused of. Behind their backs. There's a lady.

[B]

That guy has a blonde wig on. What about him?

[A]

That's a trans lady. That's that Carrie lady, I believe. Is that her?

[B]

Get up here.

[A]

Get up here. Trans carry. You trans. Son of a bitch. You.

[B]

Is she trans?

[A]

Really? Well, come on down. No, no. We met her last night at. What's your deal? Oh, trans. Gary.

[B]

Hey.

[A]

Oh, I thought she was gonna Paco onto the stage.

[B]

Yeah, she jumps.

[A]

Go for it. Show us you're still a guy.

Yeah.

[B]

How you doing? We got a microphone over there. Yeah, you should grab it. I mean the microphone. How you doing? Come over here. So, Carrie, right up. Move up a little bit.

[A]

I'm asking for a friend, if you would. A girl. Would it be Joe derosa?

Yes. Yay.

Gary, you're a comedian? No. God no.

[B]

You're not a comedian?

[A]

No.

[B]

I make tick tocks. You make tick tocks? All right. Pretty low bar. All right.

[A]

It's her. I know. I bet if you go right now to the her TikTok, it says, followed by Robert Kelly live.

[B]

I have to change my Bobby to Bobby Bobby Ie at the end. So do you like. Do you like. Is there any comics you think are hot?

[A]

I mean, obviously I love Jim Norton.

[B]

How. Why does. Why do. What is the attract. Do you like worms that live in apples? What is. What the fuck is the attraction?

[A]

I know what it is. I know what it is. Because he looks like a post op vagina. Oh, that's right. He looks like a cut off penis.

[B]

Why? Why? There's something hot in the self confidence about who? Jim Norton. That goes. I suck.

[A]

You think he exudes self confidence? That is a weird take. Yeah, like he likes it. He's out and proud and.

[B]

Oh, that part.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Okay, great.

[A]

I think it's amazing.

[B]

So if you're out and proud, that's attractive to you? What if you were out and not proud of it? What? What if you hate yourself? Secretly hideous, huh? Have you ever been with a comic?

[A]

Name, names, Names. That's a. Three names went through her head during that pause. I can. I can only dream about Joe derosa.

[B]

Really? We can, but I can't. She said she can only dream about Joe derosa.

[A]

Oh, you can. Wow.

[B]

No, you can't. You can have. That's a reality.

Yeah. Around 9:30. You could have him.

[A]

9:30, right. 5:30 before the show. Joe's going to be sleepy during that 8 o' clock show. Hey, guys, you're going to start doing the Chappelle talking to your cigarette. I don't know, guys.

[B]

Wait, though. Wait, wait, wait. We got to make sure because Derosa De Rosa is not going to be interested. Do you. Do you still have.

[A]

Oh, yeah. I'm keeping it for.

[B]

Oh, good. All right, Joe's back in.

[A]

Yeah. Don't you dare ever get rid of it. Do you.

Do you.

[B]

That makes you a unicorn.

[A]

Do you hope it's bigger than yours or do you not care?

[B]

It's bigger.

[A]

The bird. Yeah, her bird. The bigger the better, I think. Yeah. It's like if I go to a restaurant, I don't want a meal. I could cook.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Can I, buddy? Can I bear.

You just got black love from that. All right. You're all good in the hood.

Tell you something. Thank you. Can I bear my soul? Can I bear my soul? Bear it not. I'm not into it, but if I was, I'd be like, yeah, dude, bring on the heat. Yeah, yeah, yeah, we're going to get wet.

[B]

Question.

[A]

How big's your wienis?

[B]

I. I know that you would. Would you. We have a. Would you ever go down on them?

[A]

Yeah, you know what? In time, I would, but it's a thing you got to build up to. It's got to be at least seven, seven, eight minutes in.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. You don't run straight into it. You know what I mean? But like, yeah, in time, I probably.

[B]

Would you treat it like a vagina or would you treat it like a.

[A]

How could you treat it like a vagina?

Looks like you're treating him like a. To me. Just like, eat out the dick hole. Does any three pussies.

[B]

Yeah. Are you gonna. Are you gonna get down or you just gonna.

[A]

I wouldn't want to go. I wouldn't want to go straight in too soon. You know what I mean? Because here's why. Because I'd be afraid I might gag. You know what I mean? I don't want to go because I'm not ready. No, you Won't. I'm gonna gag. I.

Like that. I would be ready for the. You know what I'm saying? I'd say the move would be. If I can suggest.

By all means. You would start. You'd be laying down. Here's what I'm picturing. Can we do it? Yeah, can we do it? Okay, if you lay down for me, Joe, here's our picture.

[B]

Do you wanna.

[A]

Here's what's sad. I swear to God, my bird just moved, so I gave you a little bit of that fucking dumper, dude. Oh, yeah, look at you. No, who's who?

[B]

Who's who?

[A]

Drink it in, buddy.

[B]

You gotta.

[A]

Yeah, you gotta.

[B]

You got a little. No, no, no.

Really. He's self conscious about his really small. Where are you going?

[A]

No, I don't want you to wait. So what am I doing? I'm laying down here. Yeah, yeah. I'm stuffing.

[B]

You're laying down.

[A]

Isn't this where Uncle Laser's was last night? Jesus. All right, I was there.

[B]

This is nuts.

[A]

Look at that load patch.

[B]

This is nuts.

[A]

Seriously now, what happens if I were. And your name again? Kerry.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

What I would do is I'd say I'm gonna start by sucking your shit. Right. I'm down here sucking your shit. I'm gonna work on it. Okay. But slowly, I'm swinging over. Okay. Slowly. Yeah, get used to it. Now you're tugging me off a little bit. Oh, of course. Yeah. You're tugging me off a little bit. And I'm pounding you out like this. Okay. And then I'm coming around a little bit more. Getting it closer to you. Yeah. And then eventually I just flop it in your.

[B]

Oh, get up. And then he just.

[A]

And then we're 69ing. Yeah, that's how fast I would have come. And then Joe spilled quick. Exactly.

[B]

I'm impressed with that game of Twister. Gay twister.

[A]

Thank you. Thank you. These are my Punish jeans, actually. Were you not not amazed that Jake kept himself up?

[B]

I mean, look at it. He almost died. But, yeah, it was wild.

[A]

Don't make me get that in my tank top, dude. Yeah. No.

[B]

So. So if Joe wanted to hook. Are you attracted to Joe at all?

[A]

He's a stud.

No, that's a lie.

That's your first lie tonight. Are you even trans?

[B]

Let me ask you a question real quick. Out of the three of us, who would be your first pick if you know just sex.

[A]

Not just know it's gonna hurt no matter what.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So I'm a huge skanks fan, so it would have to be. It would be Jay.

[B]

Jay.

[A]

But he doesn't. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sorry, bro. Sorry, Joe.

[B]

Sorry, Joe. That hurt.

[A]

Whatever, dude. I don't even like her anyway. Dude, when you're sucking her dick, she's gonna be seeing my face.

[B]

Jake.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

What the.

[A]

That's true. That would really ruin it. Yeah. Who would be your second? Go ahead. Who would be your second?

You know, Bobby, I'm sorry. I love you. Holy. Dude, you're a fellow New Hampshire person. But I would go with. Wait, who's in the section? Bobby. Bobby. You know what? You.

[B]

Wait, stop, stop. She said. Listen. She said. Sorry, Bobby. I'd go with Joe. You relax.

[A]

Oh, I'm a. Just because I want to suck some chick's. Oh, is that who you are? No, I'm saying that guy now.

[B]

I'm saying that.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

She picked you.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

She picked you.

[A]

Okay. Yeah. It's too little, too late out of you. Oh, no, I think it's big.

[B]

I bet it's not too little.

[A]

I think it's big. And the time is now. It doesn't. It's. It's. You can't. A girl after she picks Jay first because I'm just gonna think of you the whole time. Yeah, it's. You're welcome.

[B]

All right.

[A]

Do you remember, Joe?

Do you remember? This reminds me. And this is how you must have felt, dude, because I saw.

[B]

Yeah. Wait, wait, wait. Jacob, what's up? What's wrong, buddy?

[A]

No, I was.

[B]

I don't want to break up this new love, but we have to go to a break. What's up?

[A]

We have to go to a break.

[B]

Why?

[A]

Let me.

[B]

Let me ask you a question. Let me ask you a question. What the fuck? What the fuck is wrong with you? But what's going on? There's something's wrong. Bobby.

[A]

I heard you guys.

[B]

Nothing's wrong.

[A]

I heard there's, by the way, rumblings.

[B]

Come here.

[A]

Can I tell you, there's rumblings the hotel. That you and Bobby are fighting in the halls.

I've heard more than one people outside of the hotel be like, Bobby and Jacob.

[B]

Okay, it was a bit one sided.

[A]

What happened? What happened?

[B]

It wasn't just the halls.

[A]

It was in the parking lot.

[B]

It was in front of the hotel. It was in front of a lot of people.

[A]

Parking lot. We don't even have cars here.

[B]

You guys don't understand. Jacob gets very nervous and he gets very neurotic and he's like, bobby, when are we gonna. When are we. And I'm like, dude, we'll figure it out. We'll figure it out. This is weeks of this. And then out front, I was like. He's like, bobby, can we go? And I was like, dude, I got a lot to do. I'm gonna get to it. We're good. Everything's happening. You just gotta give me a beat. I gotta go do this thing. Just give me a beat. And he went, so 11am tomorrow. I went, what the fuck? You gotta stop. I know what it is. I know what it is. I know why you're all fucked up. I'm a professional. Nope. No, you are. That's the reason.

[A]

Yeah, There's Jacob. Jacob, Jacob.

There's been.

[B]

I know.

[A]

There has been. There's been. There's been tension in the studio.

[B]

I'm going to tell you why. You know why?

[A]

Why?

[B]

Because you haven't seen your guys. You haven't seen Shane, you haven't seen Tim.

[A]

Oh, Dan's not coming till tomorrow. And you leave tomorrow.

[B]

You don't know that.

[A]

You.

[B]

You've seen them?

[A]

No, I have not seen them.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

They haven't sought you out?

[B]

No.

[A]

And if you must know, I'm going to be flying home as Dan is flying in.

[B]

I liken this might not be the crowd for it, but it's kind of.

[A]

Like the Titanic in the Olympic. Passing on the. On the Atlantic on that fateful night, so.

[B]

Except nobody's drowning. But I'm not going to see him.

[A]

I guess he's not going to be able to take you out for franchise stakes.

[B]

But it's cool.

[A]

So you're so bummed. You haven't seen anybody, Shane. Not once.

[B]

You miss you guys. You know what I think this calls for?

[A]

I'm here.

[B]

You know what I think this calls for? A live episode of Jacob Likes Guy instead of a live studio audience right now at Skag Fest.

[A]

Jacob loves guys.

[B]

Jacob loves guys. Right now. Are you ready now? Let's do it.

[A]

Can I say something?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

We got to take a commercial break, Jacob. That's correct. So we will come back. Are we letting this lovely couple go suck each other's dicks?

[B]

Yeah, right now. You go suck each other's dicks right now.

[A]

Let's go.

[B]

We got to take a break. Come on.

[A]

What are you raping me right now? What are you doing? No, Kerry's raping you. Let's go. Jay, are we leaving?

[B]

Yeah, we're leaving.

[A]

We'll be right back. Just want me to stand kind of supportively. I get to sit on the stool next to Big J Okerson. You Shut up. Whoa. You didn't know we were stool buds already? Wow. Huh? Shane is here.

[B]

Oh.

[A]

How about it for one more? And the final Jacob at top player, Shane Gillis coming back to the playhouse.

Playhouse. Hey.

[B]

We got Joe. Joe DeRosa back there, too. Get Yamanika. Didn't we go over all this?

[A]

Bobby just keeps inviting more and more people on stage.

[B]

Yeah. You want this seat? What? You look a little weird. You want this seat?

[A]

I look weird?

[B]

Yeah, you look. It's short. You look short.

[A]

Oh, no, it's all right.

[B]

You good?

[A]

Yeah. Stools.

[B]

I gotta say, Tim, you killed it. Yes.

[A]

Did.

[B]

You guys didn't know I could sing like that.

[A]

I did know. I mean, I didn't know, but I knew. I knew. When I see you could sing. Oh, yeah. Monika, everybody. Hey.

[B]

Hello. Thank you. What a blessing. What a blessing. Did you guys enjoy my acting? I was so. Thank you.

[A]

You took us there. Thank you. I did. I know it took a lot for you to smash Jacob's stupid face between your tits.

[B]

That was. No, I want to. Next year, I'm gonna do the naked comedy roast.

[A]

Are you?

[B]

Yeah. I'm gonna get down 20 more pounds and then have to have the skin removal surgery. And I'll do it. I will.

[A]

I will.

[B]

Well, it might need a host if.

[A]

Zach doesn't make some changes.

[B]

Oh, no. I love Zacky. Don't do that. We love him, too.

[A]

I love him so much. Dude.

[B]

Dude.

[A]

He's gonna have a Charlie Kirk funeral. I promise you.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

We're all coming out to pyro.

I'm sorry. I feel like I'm phasing out. Bobby, over here.

[B]

Shane.

[A]

Have you been having fun at the festival, dude?

[B]

Yeah. Do you good?

[A]

Yeah, it's been great. Have you ridden the ride yet? I have not. Will you ride the roundup with me? I'll get on the Gravitron. Yeah. I mean, I. Lewis needs to stand on the Gravitron. Lewis. Lewis is afraid of it. He went on once me yesterday. But if he'll go on. If you go. You want to go on after this? Maybe. Will you go on? I'll stand on it.

[B]

What do you mean you'll stand on it?

[A]

You stand. You stand and get sideways on the graviton. It's not a Gravitron techn. Thanks a lot, Professor. It's a roundup. It spins around, you get stuck to the wall. Is it not a Gravitron? There's no roof. It's a. Yeah. It's not an official side with it. Have a Roof. So what the. This. It's not a ground upon brand. A roundup. Yeah.

[B]

So it doesn't go as fast as a Gravitron.

[A]

It does go as fast as a Graviton. Graviton's inside with a dj. Did you guys not grow up at carnivals? Yeah, but everybody here, silver spoon of their whole lives. Come on, man.

[B]

Yo.

[A]

9:00Pm we're all meeting at the fake Gravitron. And I want every dude in here.

[B]

Trying to stand on it at time. The same. Same time.

[A]

Okay. Actually, I'm sorry. Those of you able to fit on the ride, I want us all trying to stand at the same time. Get up the steps to the ride.

[B]

This whole front row is out.

[A]

Yeah. A lot of us are just going to have to stand on Earth. And that'll be impressive.

[B]

Yeah. Me and you will ride the Ferris wheel. Oh, somebody sent. Okay, let me not say what I heard. I want to say this serious. How'd this turn into Oprah?

[A]

I know, but I like it. Shane, what makes you afraid?

[B]

No, wait, hold on. Stop. As I look around this room, I see, like, since the beginning, I've been a part of this nonsense. Every year I've been trying to get the fuck away from y'. All. Like, every fucking year. And it doesn't happen. And I'm just so.

[A]

You can't get away.

[B]

Yeah. Anyway, I'm just so happy that you guys came and you support Skank Fest and you come out and you guys are such awesome fucking fans. And, you know, even when we have to deal with the shit online, no one's ever come out and been disrespectful to me here. Nothing but love and kindness. So I just want. I felt like that. I really love that. Thank you guys so much for being here.

[A]

I thought you were gonna say every year, I'm like, I'll come back and I go, there's gonna be more black people. And every year.

[B]

No, every year it's gotten less.

[A]

It's less.

[B]

Yes. The reverse.

[A]

You get DMs. When they announce Gang Fest. You go, I'm sorry, but I can't.

[B]

I'm telling you, I'm gonna have to do. Do a Black History Month show here one day.

[A]

I'll do it with you. Nice. Nice. You get back on that. Just give another side of history, you know.

We can.

[B]

But.

[A]

Yeah, we can talk about it.

[B]

Yeah, of course, of course, of course.

[A]

Both present arguments. Man.

Jacob is so hard right now that he got to touch both you guys. Jacob is. He was hard on my back. I can feel it. No doubt. He hasn't even popped back out on stage. Where is that little pervert? He's jacking off. He's finished. Where are you? A little weirdo.

A little weird. So bousy. He's in the Yokradum jacking off tent outside.

[B]

He was so nervous all week for this whole night.

[A]

He was Jacob. He toils over these shows and it's like, buddy, if it goes shitty, it's funny, it doesn't matter. But he's like, no, I. I want to be off page. He's just off page. Bobby loves plays, don't you? You see? You should have heard him trying to explain the play. No, Bobby. Bobby, above all else. Thespian, sure. Nothing to do with that. No, Bobby's a thespian. Bobby's an actor. He want. Likes it all.

[B]

I love it. I was typing away, dude. I had a typewriter. I would have did it on a typewriter.

[A]

Your gay impression. Like when you act gay on stage.

[B]

Act when one of your. What was that?

[A]

One of your bits. You do a little gay act out. And you're so good at it that I was like, what the. Yeah, like mad.

[B]

I'm fantastic.

[A]

Maybe you should.

[B]

Bobby, do you have transitionals on or those shades?

[A]

No, dude, the pants are bad.

[B]

Those are my glasses. Your glasses? Yeah.

Joe has transitions. No, they look bad, Bobby. I'm just saying they look cool. They look bad. You look like Paul McCartney is doing really bad right now. I don't know. Say it. I want you to say something back to me right now.

Let it be. Let it be, Let it be. If we're on a podcast, they do it.

[A]

Not here. Yamanika. We can't let you see the standing ovation it would have gotten.

No. All right, Bobby, hold back.

[B]

I want to say something about a hair.

[A]

What? That shit's dope.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I wish I could do that with my hair, but society wouldn't allow it outside the Juggalo fairgrounds.

But within those fairgrounds, I could have dreadlocks for four days. They would have put me on their shoulders like the May Queen.

All right, you bought Bobby plenty of time for the hair comment. And from the top. Go ahead, Bobby, take it from the top. Oh, are you drawing a picture of Dane Cook over there? Chris, you piece of. Damn, dude. That's Bobby, a long time enemy.

[B]

Who is that?

[A]

Who? Tim Dylan.

[B]

Tim?

[A]

I mistook Tim Dillon for Dane Cook. That says something bad for Dane Cook, something good for Tim Dillon. Isn't that crazy? It's an Insult to one and a super big compliment for the other.

I didn't know Tim Dylan has Dane Cook hair, man. Are we going to ride this ride? Are we going to go out there and ride this thing right when.

[B]

I can't do. I can't do it.

[A]

Why? What happened? Right now? Yeah. Did you leave your balls back in the hotel? D.

No. Don't make fun of me. Don't follow me. Make fun of me. I can't handle.

[B]

Hey, shut up.

The.

[A]

No, I just don't feel like doing that. No. I had a couple drinks. I'm not gonna puke on the graviton. Yeah, I feel like I'm gonna puke. Everyone's gonna puke on this Gravitron. Everyone here was gonna puke at some point. Oh, yeah. Gravitron or neck Graviton or not. Doesn't fucking matter.

[B]

I just saw Tommy Pope back there. He goes, hey, buddy. I go, what's up? What are you doing? He goes, I just threw up.

[A]

Yeah. And smiled like a child who was able to get back in the game. Good. Now can I sleep in your bed? It's 4pm let's go out there and get hemmed up. What do you say, everybody? How about it for our guests tonight? Joe derosa, Tim Butterly. The great Shane Gill is joining the show. The great Yamanika's joining the show.

[B]

Jacob, you guys are the best.

[A]

Thank you so much, everybody. Oh, Big J Okerson.

[B]

Ah, the sounds of an Etsy holiday.

[A]

Now that's special. Want to hear it again?

[B]

Get original and affordable gifts from small shops on Etsy. For gifts that say, I get you shop Etsy. Hey there, it's Kelly Rupa and have you been listening to my podcast? We are knee deep in season three, and if you haven't heard it, it's time to get on board. After years of interviewing celebs on camera, I finally get to bring you the real conversations that take place when the cameras aren't rolling. Where else are you going to hear Michelle Obama talk about keeping her girls out of Page Six? Hilaria Baldwin's hilarious reaction to Alec running for office, or Jeremy Renner's lucid hallucinations about Jamie Foxx? Nowhere else. It's raw, it's honest, and best of all, it's off camera. And believe me, that's where you get the good stuff. So download. Let's talk Off Camera with Kelly Rippa now. Wherever you get your podcasts.