Snow White of Desserts

Summary

The Bonfire w/ Big Jay Oakerson & Robert Kelly

Episode: "Snow White of Desserts" — July 31, 2026

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Episode Overview

In "Snow White of Desserts," hosts Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly deliver their signature blend of stand-up comic camaraderie, unfiltered banter, and offbeat storytelling. The episode centers around Lou's trip to the Las Vegas Sphere to see No Doubt (and Gwen Stefani), leading to wide-ranging discussions on concert experiences, Vegas gambling stories, physical comedy, the perils of fandom, and the joy of freeze-dried desserts. Throughout, the crew maintains an irreverent, self-deprecating humor and genuine camaraderie, offering listeners a glimpse into the unique world of touring comedians and their personal highs, lows, and obsessions.

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Main Discussion Points & Insights

1. Lou's Las Vegas Sphere Concert Experience (01:36–13:18)

• Lou recounts attending No Doubt’s show at the high-tech Sphere venue, describing both the excitement and frustration surrounding the concert—and his first-hand impressions of the Sphere.
• The group dissects:
  • The sphere’s use (or misuse) of immersive visuals, which overshadowed the live band’s presence.
    • Lou: "The video is supposed to be an accompaniment to the music, not the other way around. The star was the visuals." (11:33)
  • Audience demographics—many fans dressed as Gwen Stefani in various iconic looks, and some rowdy audience members.
    • Robert: "Bunch of fat women in clam diggers, half tops... wearing vans their fat feet don’t fit in." (08:51)
    • Lou: "There was a chola sitting right next to us. We were in Section 400... She was drunk and her Spanish boyfriend was in a soccer outfit. They wouldn’t let us pass, so we were trapped in there." (09:03, 09:27)
  • Struggles with seating, crowd etiquette, and how the immersive venue physically constrained typical concert enjoyment.
    • Big Jay: "You’re trapped in sobriety." (12:40)
    • Lou: "No, but, I was cool and in the mood, but this chola next to us was a problem... We were squished into our seats so there was no moving." (13:08)
• The crew riff on crowd types, using the experience as a launching pad for riffs on rowdy fans, cholas, and concert mishaps.

Memorable Moment

• Lou’s girlfriend’s fighting spirit, described through the lens of Indian mythology and Street Fighter video game references:
  • Big Jay: "If my Indian fighting suits me, I believe Indian people can throw their arms like 10 yards out... And she can turn into an elephant." (09:44–10:02)

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2. Vegas Gambling War Stories (02:53–07:01)

• Robert, Jay, and Lou share classic tales of gambling—winning and losing big, the addictive thrill, and crushing losses in casinos.
  • Robert: "I lost my gambling thing when I was doing colleges... I put $100 on 17 black. Nothing. I lost all my money... Frosty just said he heard me go, 'No.' He found me almost crying by the fountain. I was just sitting there, holding my head like, 'I got no more money.'" (05:06)
  • Big Jay: "First time, I turned $100 into $350 at a $5, $10 table. Then a month later—I lost four hands in a row and was done. Gambling’s not my jam." (03:45)
• Preference for slot machines and the ritualistic way comedians play.
  • Robert: "I like when people play slots, rub the button like it’s a clitoris. I pretend the slot machine is a woman." (07:01)
  • Voucher debate: they realize Jay’s $201 credit at MGM may have expired. (08:04)

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3. Vegas Shows: Hits and Misses

• A tangent into the pros and cons of Vegas entertainment:
  • O (“the water show") at Bellagio:
    • Robert: "It's one of the best things I've ever seen... That whole stage becomes a pool and sinks down. It was really fucking wild." (19:11–20:26)
  • Contrasted with disappointing knock-off shows and the dated phenomenon of Irish step-dancing, Riverdance, and Lord of the Dance sensations.
    • Big Jay: "It was infomercials! That was the only way we ever heard of Michael Flatley. You could order VHS sets late-night." (21:15)
    • Robert: "Tap dancing—most of it's just… yeah, take that, Gregory Hines and Sammy Davis Jr., you stole white culture yet again." (21:48)

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4. Comedians and Their Merch – The Making of a CD (27:59–35:10)

• Robert and Jay delve into the oddities and regrets of their comedy careers, focusing on Bob’s creation of a DVD documentary about making a comedy CD—and whether it was ahead of its time or a misfire.
  • Robert: "Before my time again! Think about it—I made a DVD of the making of a CD... If I just kept the camera rolling, I'd have my special." (27:59)
  • Amazon reviews of their comedy albums—celebrating glowing ones, and reveling in the honesty/brutality of the negative ones.
    • Big Jay: "Much funnier than his comedic pimp, Dane Cook." (35:10, reading an Amazon review)
    • Jacob: "There's nothing worse than a review that says 'it's just okay.'" (36:00)

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5. Freeze-Dried Delicacies: Snow White of Desserts (41:14–44:17)

• The comedic highlight and namesake for the episode: Bobby's heartfelt reverence for freeze-dried ice cream sandwiches.
  • Robert: "I grabbed the box and pushed them all into my cart. I bought 10... It's a little treat at the end of the night... You've never had an ice cream sandwich until you've had a freeze-dried ice cream sandwich. It's almost magical... it's like you had sex with the woman of your dreams and you nutted inside her, but you know she couldn’t get pregnant because she had a hysterectomy." (41:29–44:10)
  • Big Jay (nicknaming): "I feel like you should be surrounded by cartoon birds and stuff. Just really loving you, buddy. I like Snow White of desserts." (42:26)

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6. Comedian Camaraderie and Social Media Shoutouts (37:45–39:58)

• Playful ribbing over following and supporting each other's social media content.
  • Robert: "Worst part about comedians is that they don’t like anything other comedians do. If we all just liked our own shit, it would actually bring stuff..." (38:30)
  • Big Jay (to his assistant): "Dylan, thumbs up Bobby's or heart Bobby's thing, please." (38:22)

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Notable Quotes

• Robert Kelly (on losing at gambling): "Frosty just said he heard me go, ‘No.’ And then he found me almost crying by the fountain." (05:05)
• Big Jay Oakerson (on the immersive Vegas concert sphere): "You just went to watch a movie on the ceiling?" (11:26)
• Lou (on No Doubt): "The band sounded great. She looked great… but I couldn’t see any of this. I wanted to be closer to it." (10:40–11:16)
• Robert Kelly (freeze-dried ice cream sandwiches): "The magic that happens, it’s almost like you had sex with the woman of your dreams and you nutted inside her and you know she couldn’t get pregnant because she had a hysterectomy." (44:00)
• Big Jay Oakerson (on comedian support): "The worst part about comedians is that they don’t like anything other comedians do." (38:30)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

| Segment Description | Timestamp | |:----------------------------------------------|:-----------| | Intro & Lou’s Sphere concert overview | 01:06–13:18| | Vegas gambling stories | 02:53–07:01| | Slot machines and vouchers | 07:01–08:19| | Concert crowd and seating woes | 08:51–13:16| | Vegas shows: Water show & Riverdance | 19:11–22:25| | DVD/CD Merch talk & Amazon reviews | 27:59–37:45| | Freeze-dried treat saga | 41:14–44:17|

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Summary

"Snow White of Desserts" exemplifies the strengths of The Bonfire: raucous storytelling, hyper-personal anecdotes, authenticity, and the hosts’ refusal to take themselves too seriously. Through adventures in Vegas, deep dives into the mechanics of gambling addiction, ribbing about physicality and performance, and surprisingly poetic odes to novelty snacks, Jay and Bobby maintain the lighthearted, inclusive energy that defines their show. Whether you’re a die-hard comedy fan or just looking for a glimpse into touring comics’ real lives, this episode delivers with big laughs and bigger personalities.

Transcript

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And now, the bonfire with Big J Okerson and Robert Kelly.

[Robert Kelly]

Fucking wait. Just hit the button.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

What happened?

[Robert Kelly]

Fucking had my headphones on for 12 minutes.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

What are you on a Lou for?

[Robert Kelly]

Because he's waiting for you to get into your whatever mode.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

My mode.

[Robert Kelly]

Lou Lou's terrified of you.

[Lou]

No. To turn on your. To turn on a microphone kills the studio speakers. And Jay was rocking out.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, Put the headphones on. You can still rock out.

[Lou]

You're a bummer.

[Robert Kelly]

You're a bummer. Don't get mad at me because.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Nice and fun to have it loud in the room because we all like.

[Robert Kelly]

This is. This is why he's mad because he went to the Sphere this weekend.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Why are you mad about that? Because he had to watch. No Doubt.

[Robert Kelly]

You had to watch. No Doubt.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Not really use the Sphere that well. That's all I've heard. I've heard. They really does not. It's like there's no reason for it to be the Sphere, but it's rather seen in a smaller place.

[Lou]

And it gave me a bad impression of the sphere. Like they didn't use it well.

[Robert Kelly]

Hang on one second. Back up. I want to know about you now. You're going out there with your girl for her birthday.

[Lou]

Yes.

[Robert Kelly]

What is your. Are you lying to her? Telling you're excited?

[Babbel Advertiser]

You're.

[Robert Kelly]

You can't wait. Are you. Are you. Are you making the fantasy for her that you're going to. Oh, this is. We're going to have a good time or are you being.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You go, we're like Gwen Stefani and Blake Shelton. The jersey.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah. Are you doing that horseshoe?

[Lou]

I'm a casual fan. I wouldn't say I'm a no Doubt fan or a Gwen fan, but I like her. I know about five songs, so I'm game. I've never been in the sphere. I want to see what that's all about.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I figure no Doubt, you'd know maybe seven, eight songs.

[Robert Kelly]

Maybe even, I would say the first two albums.

[Lou]

Well, no Gwen songs, just no Doubt songs, so.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, she does her own stuff, too.

[Lou]

She doesn't do her own stuff. Only with the band. So, yeah, looking back, I probably knew about six songs, but.

[Robert Kelly]

So as you go. So you get there, you get to the hotel. You have a day before you go in.

[Jacob]

Yep.

[Lou]

Mandalay Bay, we were staying at. She loves Vegas. We gambled.

[Robert Kelly]

Oh, really? Did you win?

[Lou]

I won, yeah.

[Robert Kelly]

What'd you win?

[Lou]

I won 100 bucks, but I was up a couple hundred.

[Robert Kelly]

But I was.

[Lou]

No, I gave. Yeah, I gave away most of my winnings, but I like the rush of winning. I'm like, oh, I could be addicted to this in a second.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, you don't need to do that, Lou.

[Lou]

I know that. We took my money and ran.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, you don't need to be addicted to that. So, so exciting to be you and Voss on the road.

[Advertisement Voice]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

All it takes if you probably. If the next time you go, if you just lose out of the gates, it might turn you around quick because I have an addictive thing, too. But, like, it was back to back weeks. My first two times with Kevin Hart, after our shitty show in. In Atlantic City, went to Caesars. First time, I turned like a hundred bucks into, like 350 bucks at, like, a five, $10 table.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

And then we went, like, in a month later and tried it again, and only 25 tables open. And I took the $100 and just four hands. Just boom, boom, boom. And I was like, yeah, gambling's not really my jam.

[Robert Kelly]

I actually lost a lot. I lost my gambling thing when I was doing colleges. Me, Frosty, and Who's that dude? Dave. He was on the Real World, the first guy got kicked off. Dave.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, Dave Edwards.

[Robert Kelly]

Dave Edwards. We were doing a college together, and this is when Foxwoods first opened. On our way back, we stopped at Foxwoods, and I sat at a roulette table, and he didn't even know what he was doing. He was like, what do you do? And I was like, dude, you just Take your money and you put it on whatever number you think it's, you know. And I was trying to explain to him the game. I was all into it. And it was. Each chip was five dollars, which I didn't know. So I put $100 down. And I always play 17 black. And around 17 black. So he puts chips everywhere. Five dollar chips hits, wins. 2,500 bucks out the gate. All my chips. It's the worst in roulette when they,

[Big Jay Oakerson]

they just go, all of your bets are out.

[Robert Kelly]

They just sweep everything except one lucky douchebag. And he wins. So then I go to another roulette table. I look, we're about to leave now, mind you, I made a thousand dollars at this college. I had no money in the bank. I had nothing.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

All right, big dog.

[Robert Kelly]

And I just made a thousand dollars out of college to pay.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

And you're hanging out with the guy from the real world.

[Robert Kelly]

Hanging out with the guy with the real world. Frosty's there, my agent. I look over at the other thing and on roulette it said black came up. It was just all black. Like red did not come up. So I'm like, dude, I'm going to, I'm going to take. I'm going to take money and I'm going to put it. So I had like $500 left and I took, I took $100 and I put it on. I put it on 17 black. Nothing. I take it was. It was all red and I was like, black, 17 black. I put it on black again. I put it on the black, all black. I lost all my money. And the last hand was, I think $100 or $50 on it. The last money I had. And it came up, it came up again. Red. It came up like 50, 15 times, just red. And it was like unheard of odds. And I. Frosty just said he heard me go, no. And then he came over and he found me almost crying by the fountain. I was just sitting there holding my head like, I got no more money.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Who would you have to break bad news to after that? Who do you have to do? Who's your. You have to go home and be like, I don't.

[Robert Kelly]

I was living at. I was living at 97th street at Billy's apartment.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

But Burr. So I'm saying you came, but you might have to go to Burr and be like, fuck buddy, I ain't got it this month.

[Robert Kelly]

Frosty actually said, dude, I'm gonna get you a gig this week. He's like, I'll get You a gig this week. Don't worry about it. I'll get you a gig, man.

[Advertisement Voice]

Damn.

[Robert Kelly]

He told you he got me a gig that week and I made the money back. And that's why I've never left him.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I called him in that kind of desperation before. He said, let me. Let me put you on hold for a second. And then I never heard from him again.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, he's never liked you. He loves me. That's true. He's never Was never fond of you, Jay.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I think that might be tr. I don't know what it was. I wasn't impressed with his basketball skills. That's what got him pissed.

[Robert Kelly]

I never. I only do slots. I do slot machines, Wheel of Fortune and that's it.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I like slots. Slots are kind of fun is I just. If you could smoke a cigarette. And I just bang the slots for like I'll go up, like up to 100 bucks and then split.

[Robert Kelly]

I like when people play slots, but I like rub the button like it's a clitoris. I pretend the slot machine is a woman. I'm like, baby, you like this.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That's why you get kicked out.

[Robert Kelly]

You want a little rubby?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah. They put your fucking head in a vice. If this was casino buddy, I do

[Robert Kelly]

you know when you do the button where it's the wheel of fortune, the spin button, which it. Max bet, baby. You want Max bet, don't you? I hate when somebody.

[Jacob]

Hey.

[Robert Kelly]

When someone plays and they just hit the button. Ding, ding, dang. It's just luck. I like to.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I do it all different ways. I do it all different ways. I'm sitting on from MGM, Grant. I'm sitting on a $250 credit voucher right now. Cuz I won at slot machines.

[Robert Kelly]

On the phone. On the phone or in the. In the, in the mgm.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No, no. When I was in the MGM in between the shows I went to, I started slapping the slots for a little bit and I was up 250 bucks.

[Robert Kelly]

Where is that little. Where is it? Where's the little card?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

My wallet.

[Robert Kelly]

Oh, you keep it in there so when you go back you're going to get that money.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah.

[Robert Kelly]

Well, I love that.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Let's see.

[Robert Kelly]

Oh, I love this in here.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Right?

[Robert Kelly]

There it is.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Look at that. $201.

[Jacob (continued)]

Does it expire?

[Robert Kelly]

No, can't expire that your money does it.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Validation.

[Robert Kelly]

This is last week.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, wait. Yeah. Voucher void after 180 days. Yeah.

[Robert Kelly]

So it's expired.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's completely worthless. I mean, I don't know if it's worthless yet, but it's worth. I mean, I find somebody who's going to Vegas like next week. There's got to be somebody.

[Robert Kelly]

So you went to Vegas, you won money, and then you're going to the concert. Were you, like, going into the concert? What were the type of people going in there?

[Lou]

BTS was in town. So there was a lot of Asians,

[Robert Kelly]

a lot of Pacos.

[Lou]

Yeah, a lot of Pacos. A lot of every woman, almost every woman was dressed up like Gwen Stefani in her different stages of different videos.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Gross.

[Lou]

So, yeah, that was fun and annoying, but yeah.

[Robert Kelly]

Bunch of fat women and clam diggers, half tops.

[Lou]

Yeah.

[Robert Kelly]

Wearing vans that their fat feet don't fit in.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Just like cholas with their fucking guts.

[Lou]

Oh, there was a chola sitting right next to us. We were in section 400.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Did she have a belly button? Like a straight line up and down?

[Lou]

She was fat and sung to every song, almost every word, even the instrumental parts. So we spent 500 a seat and this.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Did she go, bone Dinka Don?

[Robert Kelly]

I'm like, I'm just a girl.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I'm just a girl.

[Robert Kelly]

Was she dressed like a mechanic on her first day?

[Lou]

No, she was drunk and her Spanish boyfriend was in a soccer outfit. Like, they were. They were a problem. They wouldn't let us pass, so we were trapped in there. Couldn't go to the bathroom.

[Robert Kelly]

Dude, blooded blood out, buddy.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, dude, you should have killed him.

[Lou]

My girl was gonna fight.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Really? Yeah, she.

[Lou]

I don't know if she can fight, but she wants to fight.

[Robert Kelly]

Dude, she's Indian and black.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Let's not forget, dude, she could throw those if. If. Listen, if my Indian fighting suits serves me, I believe Indian people have the ability to throw their arms like. Like 10 yards out.

[Robert Kelly]

Well, don't forget they also have seven arms.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Seven arms. And then I think her neck can be really big and her feet too.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, and she can turn into an elephant.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Now, Dhalsim from Street Fighter is the only Indian I've ever seen fight, but those were the powers he had, so maybe she's got that in her.

[Robert Kelly]

Are these all the Gwen Stefani?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, what is this bitch doing over here? Who is this stupid chola? Who wants a piece?

[Robert Kelly]

Go in my purse, Lou, and get out my paprika. I'm going to spray it in her eyes.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Hey, Essay. What's up, puto?

[Robert Kelly]

I'm going to kick you in your curry.

[Jacob]

Where were you in. In relation to the. The stage?

[Lou]

Is it far away?

[Jacob]

So you're watching. And so what was the Light show. What did it.

[Lou]

It's not a light show. It's all immersive. So it's like a big movie that you're in. So the screens. The whole thing is one big screen. But the problem is you can't see the band. You only get to see what the director wants you to. And they want to make it a movie. So it's like a video. There's cartoons. There's shit flying all around. All distractions, which I didn't realize. The band sounded great. She sounded great. She looks great. She's running across the stage. She's not. She's 56, but she's acting like a young girl. It was fucking cool.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

56?

[Lou]

Yeah. But I couldn't see any of this. Not.

[Jacob]

Yeah, they're like ants there.

[Lou]

Yes, they were ants. And I knew great shit was happening on the stage. I wanted to be closer to it, but instead I'm subject through to all this nonsense, this production that I got to stare at.

[Robert Kelly]

So you just went to watch a movie on the ceiling?

[Lou]

Yeah.

[Robert Kelly]

500 bucks a ticket.

[Lou]

Yeah.

[Robert Kelly]

Holy shit.

[Lou]

But I was surprised how great they sounded. But, like, the video is supposed to be an accompaniment to the music, not the other way around. Like, the star was the visuals.

[Robert Kelly]

And I don't need all this bullshit.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

If you saw Tool, if they do Tool there at the Sphere, though, it'll be about. I mean, the stage will be borderline off.

[Lou]

Right. And where. Yeah, that'd be great.

[Robert Kelly]

Jay, if you could play your lightsaber video game in this sphere, how great would that be?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

The Beat saber.

[Robert Kelly]

The beat saber in the Sphere. That's what it looks like. It looks like a video game.

[Lou]

Yeah. I don't need all this, but what it would be good for is a band like the Eagles where you don't really want to look at them. And this is the replacement for that.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, I agree. I think Tool is gonna be awesome. I think Metallica is gonna be awesome there, too.

[Lou]

I don't think you need it with Metallica. Like, I'd rather look at Metallica.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No, but they do. But they do. Did you ever see, like, they're. The movie. They did, not the. The one where they. It's like the concert video. It was great.

[Jacob (continued)]

That was awesome.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It was great. It was an imax I saw. That was so cool.

[Robert Kelly]

Were you having a good time? Were you up in your. Because every time I've been to a concert with you, you're up and dancing and having a good time.

[Lou]

I wanted to, but I was trapped in these Little seats.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Sobriety stand.

[Jacob (continued)]

Sobriety.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No, you're trapped in sobriety.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, I'm really. I'm asking you because I've only been to a concert with you trash, and you are fucking fun.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You were having a blast until you were not there. And I don't mean that mentally. I mean physically. You would fucking vanish, and then we'd all be worried about you and have to find where you are.

[Lou]

Yeah, fun. Until I fuck over all my friends and run away.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Right, Right. Why can't you find that fun part?

[Robert Kelly]

Was it fun being there?

[Lou]

No, but, like, I was cool and I was in the mood, but this cholo chola next to us was a problem.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah.

[Lou]

And we were squished into our seats so there was no moving.

[Jacob]

That would have ruined my entire evening, man. There's always two.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You hate cholas.

[Jacob]

Dimwit. That has to ruin the concert.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, he does hate showers.

[Jacob]

I mean, it just. It's very triggering when he says that, because I can tell you, like, three

[Robert Kelly]

times when next concert, I'm gonna let you wear my high heel sneakers. You can take those.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Well, to see the. The fish there all the time. And same thing is, like, I think he does, like, he loves seeing the show there, but he's, you know, his personality is very much annoyed by, like, everyone around, like, doing. And he said, you're. You're locked in.

[Robert Kelly]

I mean, every. He's annoyed by every hippie fish, smelly fan except himself.

[Advertisement Voice]

Yeah.

[Robert Kelly]

Just dancing. They don't care what's on the ceiling. They're not even there. Just like the music, man.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Did you wear your seat? Was your seat moving and stuff like that?

[Lou]

It was, yeah. Which I hate.

[Robert Kelly]

You know, Don't. Should have wore sweatpants and no underwear, dude. You would have loved it.

[Lou]

I don't need that. Don't shake my ass for me.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

How do you feel about being surrounded by blue houndstooth?

[Robert Kelly]

How does it feel that you're at. Is so big it can't. The seat has no effect on jiggles.

[Lou]

It pretty good.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

How do you feel? The sphere wasn't made for that. Thumper can't contain me.

[Robert Kelly]

Are these your.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

They can't make a sphere that can contain that dumper.

[Robert Kelly]

Lou's seat was broken.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Hell, yeah, dude. They weren't prepared for that trunk coming in. Not for that show, but I would

[Lou]

see no doubt in any other venue, you know.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

They sounded that good.

[Lou]

Yeah, they were great. They were impressive.

[Jacob (continued)]

I saw them in 1999, but they were great.

[Lou]

Yeah.

[Jacob (continued)]

And the Coachella set looked amazing. The Coachellas that they did looked a lot more fun than this.

[Jacob]

She.

[Robert Kelly]

You should have sent Christine instead of you. She would have a blast. They would. Had a good time. They would have been bothered by a chola.

[Lou]

I was. I was dancing my seat a little bit.

[Robert Kelly]

Really? Let me see. Let me see how you were dancing.

[Jacob (continued)]

Yeah, turn it up and dance.

[Robert Kelly]

Yes. Let's see what you were doing. I want to hear it. I want to see it and feel it and hear it.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Lou, dance.

[Robert Kelly]

Damn. But you got to be in your seat.

[Jacob]

A.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It looks like you're. It looks like you're throwing a fit and want to leave.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

She's like, come on. There's two more songs. You go, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

[Jacob (continued)]

To be fair, that is how you dance. Spider webs.

[Robert Kelly]

Lou's eyes and his mouth look exactly the same.

[Lou]

And here's how Nyla was dancing.

[Robert Kelly]

She was having a blast.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No, she was probably. Now, you know, it's funny, there was. The cholos are probably going, oh, this black Indian chick just kept swinging her arms left and right. Ruined my whole night. It ruined our whole night.

[Lou]

Shola smacked me in the face with her hair a few times. I'm just like, oh, this is gonna be bad.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Take that, baldi.

[Robert Kelly]

Why don't you dance, you baldy?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Why aren't you dancing different? You dancing all blanco.

[Robert Kelly]

No, you got a dumper. Get up and use it.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yo, you brought that wagon. You might as well ride it around. Yeah, that's the girl. That's the chola fury.

[Jacob]

You know, she went home and had the best time of her life. Absolutely did not give a flying that she ruined everyone around her.

[Lou]

We were trying to get past her, and she wouldn't get up from her seat. So you got to fight around her knees and hurt her. And it was just.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I love that, though. I love when people do that in airplanes. I said, if you. You drop seat back on me, especially you drop that seat back on before we take off. My knees are going to be really doing a number on your back. I mean, your seat's never going to stop moving until you move it back up.

[Lou]

But why can't you just do a little half stand up, straighten your knees, and let that person pass?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No, no, I'm very courteous with that. I'm saying when people are uncourteous to me, oh, I got you.

[Robert Kelly]

I'm saying, where were you sitting in a row? They were next to you or like to the left of you.

[Lou]

They were the first ones on the aisle. And then we were right next to them, so we had to get through them.

[Robert Kelly]

Right.

[Lou]

And we pee a lot. And we couldn't.

[Jacob (continued)]

I would have climbed up. I've been like, I move. I gotta get out of the road.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, but that's you we're talking about. We're talking about sober Lou. He can't do that. He'll kill himself.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You should have called ice.

[Robert Kelly]

All the rage

[Lou]

and they take Nyla away instead.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You should have called ICE and then just turned the phone to him. And so that's what you're calling.

[Robert Kelly]

Oh,

[Big Jay Oakerson]

they have my location already. They're triangulating as we speak.

[Robert Kelly]

But you had a good time?

[Lou]

Yeah, it was fun.

[Robert Kelly]

How was it? What'd you do after the show?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Finger sex stuff.

[Robert Kelly]

Did you get any merch or anything?

[Advertisement Voice]

No.

[Robert Kelly]

No merch, huh?

[Jacob]

Lou did tell me the two bathrooms, so he said he could make a duty in the room with her in the hotel room.

[Robert Kelly]

You got a suite?

[Lou]

Yeah, we got a sweet.

[Jacob]

Oh, I never heard of that. Two bathrooms?

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah. When you get a suite, Jacob, you get two bathrooms. A duty bathroom and then another bathroom so you can shower in it.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, yeah. One for Duke and one for Luke.

[Lou]

And we did have some time on our hands. We were gonna go see Jabberwocky, but we didn't. And we were gonna go see the Titanic exhibit, but we didn't.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, Jabberwocky was fun. I think I saw my. They were a little bit of an early evening show, so I don't know if they were putting their oomph into it. I feel like they weren't. But Copperfield was dying, so that was nice to watch. He used to watch the unraveling of the only magic. He couldn't figure out how to make his back straight again. He was really hunched over. It was so weird and uncomfort.

[Robert Kelly]

You saw a Copperfield in Vegas.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah. Yeah. He looked like he.

[Robert Kelly]

But he always had. He has that sexy. He has that Dane Cook.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No, he had.

[Robert Kelly]

Look, it's over when they. Everything is sexy.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

He's an old man with, like, weird dyed hair, I think.

[Robert Kelly]

Well, this is when he was on. What is that, the Penn and Teller show?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah. Fool us.

[Robert Kelly]

Fool us.

[Lou]

He had comedians write for him. Right. Because he likes to do little jokes in between the tricks.

[Robert Kelly]

I think so, yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Who, Copperfield?

[Lou]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I didn't see much Joe. He had such a boring narrative that he laid out.

[Robert Kelly]

What do you mean?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It was really a dull show.

[Robert Kelly]

Where was it?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Mgm.

[Robert Kelly]

Mgm?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah.

[Robert Kelly]

Is it.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

The Jabberwockies were. I'm an easy. I'm like, I'm gonna go across the. The walking bridge is as far as I'm going.

[Robert Kelly]

I love it. I love Vegas shows. I saw. Oh, the water show. Oh, fucking one of the best things I've ever seen, really. And I didn't even want to go. But we went with this one. Don's mom was still alive, so 70 year old lady, she was in a wheelchair. So we got that VIP kind of action. It was almost. We got in first. We got to seat before everybody because we had a lady in a wheelchair. And that O show, that water show is one of the greatest things I've ever seen in my life. And then they had something in New York and Don was like, we should go to this show. It's another O show. And it wasn't. It was a knockoff circus ole. And it was just people on like trampolines in a small theater and it sucked a bag of dicks. We wound up leaving halfway through. Yeah, this. Yeah, this is the. I mean, they have a. They have a pool. That whole stage becomes a pool and it sinks down into the. Into the floor and then they. They do this water. That is nuts. Yeah, the whole. The whole stage is a huge pool.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

What a stupid thing.

[Robert Kelly]

Oh, dude, it was really cool, man. It was really fucking wild. They. Ah, bad. Look at that. They just diving in the pool.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, I hate the shticks in between though.

[Robert Kelly]

I like the sticks.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I feel like any Vegas shows though, they really are about an hour long, right? It's really. They really can't be much longer. I mean, because no matter what all of this, like for an hour, this should be like. Okay, I get. They're twirling in the hoops.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, this one was good.

[Jacob (continued)]

I really flatly's Lord of the Dance.

[Robert Kelly]

Oh, you saw Irish step dancing in the. At the hype of Irish step dancing in like 98. That's.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

And it was. It was an hour long, but a little too long still.

[Jacob (continued)]

Yeah, it wasn't a. It didn't go on and on. These aren't like two, three hour shows, I think. I don't know. The Cirque du Soleils might be long.

[Advertisement Voice]

How.

[Robert Kelly]

How the fuck did we ever get into Irish step? How did that take over the country went either?

[Jacob (continued)]

But we went. I don't know why. That was a shame.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It was no channels on tv, infomercial. Infomercial got you. For some reason. It was like you could order it.

[Babbel Advertiser]

Yes.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

And it was the idea that it was like, for some reason. That's how we all heard Of Michael flatley. I couldn't tell you any of the reason why I would know of him. But it was late night program, always had the VHS sets. You can find a commercial. Find a commercial for lord of the dance.

[Robert Kelly]

And to me, it was always tap dancing on what tap dancing should be. Because tap dancing, anytime they did that, you'd see somebody do a tap movie. Like, all right, it's cool. But it's only a little cool. Like, most of it's just.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, take that, Gregory hines and Sammy Davis Jr. You stole white culture yet again.

[Jacob (continued)]

River dance commercial.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah. They never moved their arms.

[Jacob (continued)]

And then that became.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Well, he's the lord of the dance.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, of course he is. Look at him right in the front.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Put this commercial up.

[Robert Kelly]

He never moves his upper torso at all. It's just legs.

[Jacob (continued)]

Yeah, it's just like.

[Jacob]

You ever see Mike Myers parody of this on snl? Who does the river dance?

[Robert Kelly]

I'm pretty sure everybody can do the river dance.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Wow.

[Jacob (continued)]

Dance.

[Robert Kelly]

Let's go, Caitlyn.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

What happens if we try to order it still?

[Robert Kelly]

We want to call.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, let's see.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, let's call him and see if we can get it.

[Babbel Advertiser]

I have three trips planned down to south america. I'm going back to Cuba with my son, and I'm going to learn how to communicate with these people in their language, which empowers you, which makes you feel fantastic. It's never too late to learn a new language by using babbel. If you're traveling this summer, Here's a real travel hack. Don't wait until you land to start learning the language. Instead, try babbel. Babbel is built for real life, not vocab lists, not verb charts. But it's the real conversation. Practice just 10 minutes a day with babbel. It can help you start having a real conversation in as little as three weeks. Lessons are quick. They have 200 language experts. It's awesome telling you right now I can talk to people. The guy that works in my house, he's. He's spanish. He comes in and I see him sometimes struggling with me to say things to me. Now I can talk to him in spanish. He can talk to me a little bit. I don't know it all, but I know some, and I know how to be polite. I can talk to people around the city. It's amazing. Learn a new language with babbel. What language do you want to learn? They've got it. If you got summer travel coming up, now's the time to start so you can actually use what you learned on your trip. Right now, Babbel is offering listeners up to 60% off. Go to babbel.com/bonfire. That's Babbel B A B B E L.com bonfire for up to 60% off. Rules and restrictions may apply.

[Advertisement Voice]

You know that thing where you get an amazing pair of shoes at a really great price and want to tell everyone about it?

Yeah.

So do we. Here at Designer Shoe Warehouse. We'll give you something to brag about, like the latest styles from brands you love or the trends everyone's obsessing over or shoes that make you feel like, well, you. So go ahead, show off a little. Find shoes that get you at prices that get your budget. Head to your DSW store or dsw.com today. DSW. Let us surprise you.

Back to school season. You've got the new backpack, the folders, the 17 highlighter colors. But there's one essential that never makes the shopping list. Their pillow. And we all know better school days start with better sleep. So we've got big news. Coop Sleep Goods is running their back to school sale. Save 20% on the entire collection. Spend 150 bucks or more and get a free gift. The sale starts July 28 and ends Aug. 25. From cooling pillows to mattress toppers that transform thin dorm room mattresses. The only thing left to blame for a bad night's sleep is their insomniac roommate Coops. Pillows are adjustable, built to fit how your kid sleeps, whether That's a twin XL dorm bed or their room at home. Spend 150 bucks or more and get a free ultratech pillow Protector. Head to coopsleepgoods.com Comedy that's coopsleepgoods.com comedy. 20% off plus a free pillow protector with 150 bucks or more.

[Goto Bank Advertiser]

Breathe in. Feel the sense of calm that comes from having up to $300 in overdraft protection with Goto bank now.

[Jacob (continued)]

Did you say $300?

[Goto Bank Advertiser]

Yes. Now back to our breathing.

[Jacob (continued)]

So if I overspend my balance, Goto bank has my back up to $300.

[Goto Bank Advertiser]

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[Advertisement Voice]

Traditional home security only alerts you after a break in.

[Goto Bank Advertiser]

And that's too late. Simplisafe is changing that.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Stop. This is Simplisafe. Police are on the way.

[Goto Bank Advertiser]

We don't just alert, we Stop crime before it starts.

[Advertisement Voice]

Simply safe plans starting around a dollar a day. Save 50 on your new system with professional monitoring at simplisafe.com sxm or with

[Goto Bank Advertiser]

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[Big Jay Oakerson]

Simplisafe Active Guard Outdoor Protection plan starting at 49.99amonth. Visit simplisafe.com licenses for alarm license information.

[Advertisement Voice]

Tennessee 2012 this is a Monday.com ad, the same Monday.com designed for every team. The same Monday.com with built in AI scaling your work from day one. The same Monday.comwith an easy and intuitive setup. Go to Monday.com and try it for free.

[Robert Kelly]

Thank you for calling pulsetv.com Our business hours are Monday through Friday, 8 to 5 Central Time.

[Advertisement Voice]

Who?

[Robert Kelly]

Please listen carefully as our options have changed. If you're ready to place a new order, our website.

[Jacob (continued)]

Wait, I don't know if I can play that. Can I play that?

[Robert Kelly]

No, I just realized.

[Jacob (continued)]

I was like, I don't know.

[Robert Kelly]

I can play the message. The message.

[Jacob (continued)]

Just know we're on air.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

We could still order Michael Flatley's River Dance.

[Jacob (continued)]

Well, it takes you to pulsetv.com.

[Robert Kelly]

oh, I know what everybody's getting for Christmas this year. VHS River Dance.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

And I'll tell you what, just because it's probably only gonna cost me five bucks on eBay, I'll throw in a VCR wallet with it. It's already gonna be in the VCR. Jacob, when I give you this, you

[Robert Kelly]

know, we should get him the TV with the VCR so we get the TV and the VCR so you don't have to hook it up, just plug it in.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I'll be honest, it's gonna be hard not to find one of those doesn't have also a DVD player in it. But don't use that. This is just for vhs.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, you want the dvd, I'll get you the. Just a tip. The Making of a cd.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Okay.

[Robert Kelly]

Which is still available.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I'm gonna get you some weird multicolored pornographic videotapes that you can also have a stack of next to. People know it's porn because why else would it be orange and red?

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, don't forget the. The. The thing that I think brought Comedy Central down. The DVD of the Making of a cd.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah.

[Robert Kelly]

From Robert Kelly.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It was the ultimate decline.

[Robert Kelly]

I'm gonna tell you this before my time again. Before I've always been before my time. Think about that. I made a DVD of the making of a cd. So I made the whole thing up until the part where I should have started, started the video, kept the video, just kept the camera rolling. And I would have had my special. Just a tip. But I didn't. I stopped it because vlogging. Where's vlogging now? Where is behind the scenes? Where is all the stuff getting there, doing Right. That's what we're paying him for right now. I was ahead of my time. They should have. They would if they were smart. They'd re release the DVD of the Making of a CD by Robert Kelly.

[Jacob]

Did Jack Vaughn ask you why are you doing this? Why aren't you filming the actual special?

[Robert Kelly]

He asked me that today actually. He actually called me and said, hey man, you still owe us $70,000.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

But wasn't it being pushed? Isn't it because. Isn't there an actual reason why like, like at a time the big push was going to be if satellite radio was playing your stuff?

[Robert Kelly]

No.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

And if you can get it out there like on this, not the streaming, but like the rip sites, it was better to have an audio. An audio would actually get you more money ultimately in the short term if you're doing yourself.

[Robert Kelly]

My thing behind it was that I was into. There was MySpace, I was into the video behind the scenes stuff that nobody was kind of. Nobody had a YouTube page yet, but

[Big Jay Oakerson]

not the actual special itself. Okay, I stand corrected. You're an idiot. But no, I was trying to give you benefits.

[Robert Kelly]

I was an idiot at that time. But if you waited a few years. Genius.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Nobody wants video now.

[Robert Kelly]

Every. Everybody wants video now.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Everyone wants video.

[Robert Kelly]

Everybody wants video now. Of the behind the scenes.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

So the behind the scenes of something that they can't see ever?

[Robert Kelly]

Well, no, they won't see it, but they'll get to the point where they can see it and they'll have all that stuff, all the interviews with Colin and what's going into it, all the process. And then they'll get right to the. Where we get to the stage and. And then you put the.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's like just watching behind the scenes of a porno. It's like watching just everybody showing up for a porno in their regular street clothes and then leaving.

[Robert Kelly]

And here's the thing. My favorite album that ever made Just a Tip was my favorite. The actual crowd was electric. The. It was probably the four best shows I've ever done in my Life. Top top 10 shows. And I. All I had to do was go, hey, just keep it rolling. And I went, we're done. And the guy left.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I'm not paying you at these rates. Another hour I'm not gonna pay you for another hour, you asshole.

[Robert Kelly]

But you know what I should do is I should go.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It would have taken more Bobby, though. But you know, it actually, realistically, it would have taken two more camera. It would take it a lot more.

[Skills First Hiring Advertiser]

Shit.

[Robert Kelly]

I mean, he did have three cameras.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, then never mind. Yeah, Bobby, I keep trying desperately to get you out of this. Looking like you're pretty cool.

[Robert Kelly]

I. I think I'm gonna. I think I'm gonna re release Just a tip. No, I'm gonna re release the back of the DVD of the Making of a cd, which again, I have it, I believe ahead of my time. Do you have it? Because I don't have it. Yeah, we bought it. Oh, you have it?

[Jacob (continued)]

Yeah, I have it.

[Robert Kelly]

Can I have it? Because I want to rip it and I want to put it on my YouTube page.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

How much and what?

[Robert Kelly]

But I can buy it off of Amazon for 13 cents right now. Really?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Because I paid $4,600.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, well, you bought it when it could have been a thing.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's still in the wrapper.

[Robert Kelly]

Is it really? Go on Amazon, see if it's still there. I bought on it.

[Jacob (continued)]

Yeah.

[Robert Kelly]

Is it on Amazon? I wonder how much it is. I told you the time when my. My first album was Robert Kelly live from the Comedy Stop in Houston or whatever, and I was having a really bad day, and then I got a text message from Steve Byrne, who is probably the top three funny fuck yous to me. Number one being when I was at the Hard Rock Hotel and I put a 20 in a nickel machine before they gave the tickets. You would actually have to have a bucket. And if you. I fucked up. I had to go to the show, so I had to push the. Give me the money and get 400 nickels in a bucket. Then I had to wait in a line at the cashier with a bucket of 400 nickels. Steve Burns walks up to me and he goes, what are you doing? I go, I fucking got 400 nickels from that stupid man. He just smashed the nickels out of my hand. The sound of 400 nickels hitting the ground, a lot of them is almost magical. Everybody turned around in a 400 foot radius to look at me. Then I. Steve walked away. I went to walk away, the security guy went, no, no, no, no, pick him up. I had to pick them all up. And then I looked at the last second I looked, the guy in front of me was bending down and I go, did you take my nickels? You take some money?

[Babbel Advertiser]

He Goes, no.

[Robert Kelly]

And then when I got the money back, it was $19.90. The guy stole two nickels from me.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Piece of shit.

[Robert Kelly]

I walked around for hours looking for this piece of shit. I wanted my nickels.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

And then Steve Byrne, you couldn't walk away from that. You weren't allowed to walk away from the money.

[Robert Kelly]

Well, he wouldn't let me describe, but Steve Byrne also one day just sent me. I mean, I was having a bad day and he sent me a text message. He went to a Salvation army and he bought seven of my CDs for 50 cents. And then he took them and threw them on the ground and stepped on them.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, I like that. I like that.

[Robert Kelly]

That was a good one.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

By the way, Bobby, this is an Amazon Overall pick. Yeah, 4.7 out of 5. That's really great. Can we see the reviews, please?

[Robert Kelly]

Well, I don't know if I want to be a part of this. I don't know how much time.

[Jacob (continued)]

Do they all come with the DVD of the Making of the cd or is that a special edition?

[Robert Kelly]

Not only do you get the. No, you get the DVD of a Making of a cd. See, I was ahead of my time. My first album, if you got it, it was actually. You could put it in your computer.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah.

[Robert Kelly]

And the Piss the Pants monster would come out on your computer as a desktop.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Bobby Cliffy.

[Robert Kelly]

And the COVID of it was. I had a competition on MySpace called Give Bobby Head and you had to take my head and put it on things. So the. The whole cover was my head on weird little things. But this because I was ahead of my time. You got the cd. Just a tip, which was great. One of my favorite albums. I mean, favorite tapings ever. And then the DVD of the Making of a CD that I don't know if a lot of people saw, I don't think they understood it. They probably. CD player. I think it's not playing.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I think it deserves a re release. This says I give it two sporks just in case you get more than just the C. This is a review, Michael DeFamico. You get more than just the CD, which is hilarious from start to finish. You also get the 30 minute DVD copy of his Comedy Central special. What?

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, we had to throw that in.

[Jacob]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

And commentary from a number of his comedic cohorts. A great purchase for any fan of the art of stand up comedy. As good as the stand up set is, I highly encourage everyone to go see Bobby live. As much as he kills his recorded performance, his live standup is much better. Than the crowd interaction. With the crowd interaction and his ever growing repertoire of material. Take my word for this. Buy the cd, DVD and treat yourself to a night of good natured, raw, self deprecating, relatable, witty hilarity. And go see him live, Bobby. Never let him chum the waters.

[Robert Kelly]

Hey, one second. Paco, next time you work with me, I want you to say all of this in front of me, please.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Go up, please. Now to the next one. This says simply, fat body, weak knee, weak stomach, strong comedy.

[Advertisement Voice]

I'll take it.

[Jacob]

Okay.

[Robert Kelly]

I mean, this guy's right on the button.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I, well, I like that a lot. The man who broke, who made the phrase I broke my knee, man. A pop culture sensation has finally connected with something other than a cheeseburger. Bob made puke in the drop of a hat, but he eats enough to make up for it. Cut him a break and buy this disc. If you enjoy raucous laughter, embarrassing stories and stuff slightly mistimed punchline delivery, you will not be disappointed. Much funnier than his comedic pimp, Dane Cook, who has undeservedly enjoyed comedic success, which should only be reserved for the likes of Bob and Lil Jimmy. Of course, dude. Yeah, just buy it and show. Comedy Central.

[Robert Kelly]

Signed Don Kelly.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

All right, these are all positives. Keep roll down a little bit.

[Robert Kelly]

Oh, here we go.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Anybody have a problem yet?

[Robert Kelly]

Okay, we have a two.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Okay, the three. It's a three there. Robert Kelly is certainly funny, but his material isn't particularly fresh. Just a tip is a high energy jaunt that relies highly on the comedian's charisma and less on the strength of the material Due to the high number of dirty jokes he tells. Some of them are bound to fall flat. But there are plenty that land. True, Kelly is entertaining, but I found myself generally unimpressed with his choices of punchlines. They, they too often sounded like a variant. Jesus. Variations on jokes I've already heard from the perspectives that are too easy. All in all, Just a Tip is a decent album. If you aren't looking for a new comedy but want a few chuckles and cringes, you'll find them here. Ninja superstar

[Robert Kelly]

Chelsea Handler.

[Jacob]

There's nothing worse than a review that

[Robert Kelly]

says no, there's nothing incorrect.

[Jacob]

It's all right. It's not good, it's not bad.

[Robert Kelly]

No, there's nothing worse than a review from someone who is really reviewing it.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, yeah. Everybody's supposed to be like, it's like, oh, that was funny. I had a good time.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, but it's not a fan. And it's actually somebody who's like, no, I'm just gonna really review this.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Am I crazy that one of these bits I saw Bobby work out beforehand? Yeah, they're so technical about it. Do I have anything on Amazon that we can make fun of? A review of mine?

[Jacob (continued)]

Yes.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, wow.

[Robert Kelly]

We're gonna end on a bad one. Let's end on a good one.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Well, I'm gonna find a bad one of mine.

[Robert Kelly]

Ah, let's find some good ones.

[Jacob]

Can I just.

[Robert Kelly]

We should do dance. It's all five stars. Love the guy. Best thing ever. Voices are great.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

What do I have up on American Storyteller?

[Jacob (continued)]

And just.

[Jacob]

I wanted to give Bobby a five star review for this weekend. Yeah, he made my weekend.

[Robert Kelly]

Oh, yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Who's influencing?

[Jacob]

He influenced. Did you not see it, Jay?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I don't know.

[Robert Kelly]

Jay doesn't like anything I do or follow anything I do. I always check to see if there's a big J, little heart or something. I'm just looking for Big J.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No one's ever seen that, ever.

[Robert Kelly]

I always. I like his stuff. Anytime I see it, I just automatically, hey, I love it.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I don't know that.

[Robert Kelly]

I do. I do.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I believe you.

[Robert Kelly]

I do. Well, you could just tell your guy to every once in a while throw old Bob K a fucking thumbs up.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

All right, Dylan. Thumbs up. Bobby's or heart Bobby's thing, please.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, all of them.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

All Bobby's things exclusively. And only.

[Robert Kelly]

The worst part about comedians is that they don't like anything other comedians do. And if we all just liked our own shit, it would actually bring stuff.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Great.

[Robert Kelly]

You bring people so, you know, you get in the rhythm, dude.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

All right, Go to my three star. Go to my three star. There it is. He's much better live. This CD is not bad, but not very good either. He's a much better live performer who works at crowd. Well, well, Much of his material is lost on those above 30. Oh, I was for the young people back then. That was 2008.

[Robert Kelly]

What CD is this?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, it was reviewed in 2013.

[Robert Kelly]

Which.

[Advertisement Voice]

What is it?

[Robert Kelly]

What is. Which one is this?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

My first one. My Comedy Central album.

[Robert Kelly]

Oh, yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No documentary attached. Live at Webster Hall. I don't know if there's a.

[Robert Kelly]

It is mine too.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

What is this? Prime Video reviews. You just want to watch people on my. Go ahead, go to it. I don't give a. I like. I think the bad reviews are the funniest ones. Who cares? But positive reviews are great for what you need. But if I'm reading them, I'D rather see someone be like, God, what a waste of everyone's goddamn time. Makes me laugh more.

[Robert Kelly]

What is this?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

This is yours.

[Robert Kelly]

Oh, those are mine?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah.

[Robert Kelly]

Scroll down and get another one of mine.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

These are all goodies.

[Robert Kelly]

Another hot one.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No, they're all goodies.

[Robert Kelly]

There's got to be a. There's a one star. So I've seen.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No, you didn't.

[Jacob (continued)]

You have no one stars. You have one three star.

[Robert Kelly]

Oh, all right.

[Jacob (continued)]

Yeah, three or four and the rest are five.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Where's my reviews?

[Jacob (continued)]

It's not giving me access to them, even though I'm clicking on it.

[Robert Kelly]

People shut them off.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

We shut them off.

[Robert Kelly]

I, yeah, I went this weekend. I was supposed to go like, you know, I was supposed to go up country with my whole family and I had to drive myself. And I, I think I told you when I was leaving, I kind of bummed out that I'm going up by myself.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Did you whack off a bunch and

[Robert Kelly]

you said not a bunch? You know, I feel weird whacking off up at the tiny house because they have floor to ceiling windows.

[Jacob]

Yeah.

[Robert Kelly]

And I don't want to. I don't have curtains and I feel like somebody's watching.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

They are. Why don't you have curtains?

[Robert Kelly]

Well, because they're floor to ceiling windows and they're beautiful and at night you don't need them. And our house faces. When I, when we, when we put the house down, I didn't have it face the street. I had the front of the house face the woods. So when there's nobody in front of us, you can't. Nobody. They'd have to be in my backyard. But I still feel like somebody's out there. Could be just watching me wank it, you know.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, but who's watching you now? The IRS?

[Jacob]

You know, Jay, when like D.L. hughley's producer told everyone what you were thinking. Your inner monologue. Bobby tells you his inner monologue. And that's what I loved about it.

[Robert Kelly]

I'm a fluencer. I was sitting, I went there, I went there and got, I went to Walmart and they had, I almost panicked when I saw it. They had freeze, freeze dried ice cream

[Jacob]

sandwiches, which I didn't know existed, by the way.

[Robert Kelly]

I literally, I literally grabbed the back of the ice cream sandwiches and pushed all of them into my cart. I bought 10 ice cream. I bought them all and I went home because I'm going away Friday overnight with Max to do the primitive camping.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

So you're need some freeze dried ice cream sandwiches.

[Robert Kelly]

It's a little snack. It's a little treat in your little treat at the end of the night after dinner, if you. You know what I mean.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You wet them?

[Robert Kelly]

No, you just put it in your mouth, dude, and your mouth wets them.

[Jacob (continued)]

It's not just a regular ice cream sandwich.

[Robert Kelly]

It's a freeze dried ice cream sandwich. You've never had an ice cream sandwich until you had a freeze dried ice cream sandwich. The texture when it hits your mouth, it's the lightest thing in the world. But then when it hits your mouth, the saliva in your mouth magically takes over the molecules and then science happens and then you taste it and then it goes back and it's. It's almost magical.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

By the way, as you're saying this, I feel like you should be surrounded by cartoon birds and stuff. Just really loving you, buddy. I like Snow White of desserts.

[Robert Kelly]

I had them and I left them in the car. And then a storm came and I was trapped in the house. And I was waiting for the. For the storm to go away. And in four hours, torrential rain. And I was just, I want the ice cream sandwich.

[Jacob]

So what could he do? He told us he went live, but he videotaped it. His inner struggle. He said, should I go out? It was. It was like a spooky movie. It had everything. He's sitting in the tiny house alone. It's dark. There's. You can hear the rain. Should I put my raincoat on and go to the car and get my freeze dried?

[Robert Kelly]

The car was 30ft away from the house in a storm.

[Jacob]

I was riveted, dangerous.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Did you want those sandwiches?

[Robert Kelly]

I wanted them bad. And I finally put my coat on.

[Jacob]

You could feel it.

[Robert Kelly]

I walked out in the rain.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Did you treat yourself to two because you did the walk?

[Robert Kelly]

No, I treated myself to one.

[Jacob]

The joy on his face. He had it.

[Robert Kelly]

Jay.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Jacob, please. He's breaking down a little bit.

[Robert Kelly]

Jay, look at me. One sandwich. One. I grabbed one. Dude. It was torrential. It was raining, dude. Torrential.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Why don't you just bring in more? You brought in more than one.

[Robert Kelly]

I just grabbed one. I brought them all in just in case. But when you have one, you don't need another one. The magic that happens, it's almost like you. You had sex with the woman of your dreams and you nutted inside her and you know she couldn't get pregnant because she had a hysterectomy. It's okay. I love it.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Look at young hysterectomy. Like she shouldn't have had to get one yet. But she did.

[Robert Kelly]

She had to get one because it was like, you know, her family and her history.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's a dream.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah.

[Jacob (continued)]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Ain't that the dream, to be one of them?

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah. Not one, because she. She had a cyst the size of a grapefruit. One because she just had to get it.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yes. Just something happened. Like, just get rid of this now and you become a cream pie pump.

[Robert Kelly]

I'm gonna bring.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

What's up? You want us to wrap up the show so you can suck our dicks, you said?

[Jacob]

That's right.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Okay. It is Monday.

[Robert Kelly]

All right. Well, this show went fast. Big J Okinson is going to be in Spokane, the Spokane Comedy club this weekend, July 5 and 6. Then he's going to be at the Pantage theater in Minneapolis, June 12, one night. Then he's going to the Egyptian Theater In Boise, Idaho, June 13, again, one show. After that, he's going to be in Buffalo, Harrisburg, Pennsylvania and Winnipeg. For tickets and all the tour dates, visit bigj. Comedy.com get those tickets. Our little. Little J is blowing the fuck up. So if you get a chance to see him in the club, get those tickets now because that's all going to be gone. YouTube.com cash@big jokerson. He goes live. I watched it on the way up to New Hampshire the whole time and was putting stuff in the chat. Not one response, were you?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I didn't see that at all.

[Robert Kelly]

Yeah, I know you didn't. I was sitting there looking at you, screaming at you.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Bobby Kelly's gonna be governors in Levittown June 19th and 20th. And then the comedy mothership in Austin, Texas, July 3rd through the 5th. After that, Portsmouth, New Hampshire, Saratoga Springs and Brooklyn, New York. For tickets and all tour dates, go to Punchup Live. Robert Kelly. Catch him every Tuesday night. Fat Black Pussycat Lounge at the Comedy Cellar, 7pm in fact. And of course, Bobby's YouTube channel at Robert Kelly Comedy. Let's get them plaques.

[Robert Kelly]

I'm gonna get that. I'm gonna get that, get that plaque. The making the DVD of the making of a CD up on my YouTube channel. That will get me my plaque.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

We'll be back tomorrow. Here's a good teaser. On our list, it says Leslie Jones, recent stand up clip. Yes, yes, please.

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