The Bonfire w/ Big Jay Oakerson & Robert Kelly
Episode: "Thursday Night Lights" — September 12, 2025

Episode Overview

This episode of The Bonfire is a classic, unfiltered hang with hosts Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly, joined by their crew and recurring contributors. The main thread is Jay’s hilarious obsession with outfitting his Dodge Ram with “rock lights”—underglow LED car lights synched to music. This launches the show into a raucous journey across topics including car customization for grown men, the macho-diva line in automotive aesthetics, rivalry with a surly installer named Sam, football fandom, male cheerleaders, and the absurdities of American subcultures. As always, the vibe is high-energy, irreverent, and packed with personal anecdotes and ball-busting.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Jay's Rock Lights Saga (01:08–38:16)

• The Dilemma: Jay debates whether to go see Nine Inch Nails or hang with friends for a podcast taping. This transitions into his real-life drama: installing colorful rock lights on his truck, which leads to a sustained riff about male adulthood, car culture, and masculinity.
• The Enemy: Jay describes his encounters with Sam, a muscled, tattooed, standoffish installer at Sound Waves in Fairfield, NJ, turning their contentious dynamic into comedic gold.
  • "He's never been nothing but standoffishly nasty to me." – Jay Larson [14:08]
• The Legality & Utility of Rock Lights: The group debates (to much laughter) whether it’s even legal to drive with colored lights in New York and New Jersey, and who Jay is hoping to impress:
  • "I'm getting so much pussy at the mall, it's gonna blow your minds." – Jay Larson [15:43]
  • "Dude, for a guy who lives with a woman, you say the silliest shit sometimes…You just said, 'I want a white truck so I can have pink underneath.'" – Bobby Lee [17:13]
• Installation Debacle: Jay and Bobby develop an extended bit about whether magnets or drilled brackets are the superior way to install the lights, re-enacting a hypothetical confrontation with Sam, and whether it’s worth risking damage to Jay’s "dream truck."
• Tinkering Credentials: Bobby tries to prove mechanical credibility by describing how he fixed his son’s e-bike, while Jay remains skeptical.
• Crowdsourcing Opinions: The crew checks Yelp reviews for Sound Waves, cracks up at negative reviews mentioning bubbles in window tint and shoddy installs, and spitballs about hiring a TaskRabbit or GeekSquad/Best Buy to do the job instead.
• Masculinity & “Gayness” of Car Lights: Jay and Bobby riff about the fine line between “badass” and “fabulous” when it comes to personalizing cars, with Jay self-deprecating about being a middle-aged man doing light shows with EDM in parking lots.

2. Comedy Bits and Crowdwork (03:12–08:51)

• Stuttering and Fart Jokes: The episode is laced with riffs that mock Drew Lynch’s stand-up stutter and recall the hilarity of stuttering crowd work, culminating in classic fart story during a family wedding.
• Juvenile Humor: Fart stories are compared to stuttering as surefire comic gold, to which Jay adds:
  • "Fart and stuttering are on the very same level of holy funniness to me." – Jay Larson [06:11]

3. Football Fandom, Thursday Night Plans, and Cowboy Controversy (53:39–56:55)

• Thursday Night Football: The group debates who’s coming over for Jay's football night, with running jokes about not inviting certain friends and friendly trash talk about the Cowboys and Eagles.
• Bandwagon Fans: Bobby and Jay debate why the Cowboys have such a broad national fanbase and speculate about the psychology of sports loyalty.
  • "Why are you a… I have a cousin Tj you’re also an Eagles fan? Grew up in Philly." – Jay Larson [55:35]
  • "If you’re from New York, Boston, Philly…you have to be the fan from that place." – Bobby Lee [55:39]

4. Male Cheerleaders, NFL Culture, and Gender Roles (57:00–68:51)

• NFL Male Cheerleaders: A deeper (hilarious) discussion erupts about the rise of male NFL cheerleaders, why the NFL embraced them, and how it’s changed the culture.
  • “Here’s the problem: cheerleaders are to entice dudes completely. For sure.” – Jay Larson [59:42]
• History Lesson: The origin of cheerleading is traced back—surprisingly—to men, before WWII and women’s involvement.
  • “When men went off to World War II is when women took over cheerleading.” – Jay Larson [69:13]
• Cultural Change: The group jokes at length about how the growing visibility of gay men and changing gender roles in sports/cheerleading “mean nothing anymore” when you say you’re dating a cheerleader.

5. Other Classic Bonfire Topics

• Musical Interests, Relationships, and Cars: Subplots include the members teasing Christine’s (Jay’s partner) forbidden access to the car’s light show, and Bobby’s running riff about wanting a “bento dessert box and a swim in the pool” as payment for working on Jay’s truck.
• Auto Fix Tactics: Lighthearted debates about DIY vs. professional installation, crowd-sourcing labor, and the hazards of dealing with “those guys” at specialty shops.

Memorable Quotes & Moments

• "There's not one man on earth who’s ever asked, 'Do you have lights that go to the music?'" – Bobby Lee [10:54]
• "You’re a metrosexual. You’re a pioneer, that’s why I love you, dude." – Bobby Lee [11:10]
• "Are you going to pick one light for every mood?" – Bobby Lee [15:32]
• "You are going to be outside the Stand with your rock lights, smoking a cigarette for no reason, just hanging out." – Advertiser [37:13]
• "The problem is my truck is red, so there’s only so many things are going to look awesome underneath it at night." – Jay Larson [17:38]
• "If you’re not throwing girls around by their pussies and assholes, then you deserve your father to not love you." – Jay Larson [59:03]
• “When do women get involved [in cheerleading]?” – Bobby Lee [68:51]
• "When men went off to World War II is when women took over cheerleading. And then everybody was like, oh, I’d rather look at these chicks' titties bouncing around than a bunch of old men." – Jay Larson [69:13]
• "Do you leave the key in the car?" – Bobby Lee deadpanning during the Mexican parking garage riff [48:05]
• “It turns out now…maybe it’s because it’s gay.” – Jay Larson, on why more people don’t get rock lights [51:04]

Timestamps for Important Segments

• [01:08–38:16] — Jay’s Rock Lights Saga: from purchasing, installer drama, legal issues, to installation plans and debates (including initial laughter and plans for “blinking around” in mall parking lots).
• [03:12–08:51] — Comedy crowdwork, stuttering, and fart stories.
• [37:10–38:16] — Christine’s forbidden access and Jay’s resolve never to show Christine the lights.
• [53:39–56:55] — Thursday Night Football plans and Cowboys fandom debates.
• [57:00–68:51] — NFL male cheerleaders, history of cheerleading, shifting gender roles.
• [67:17–71:41] — History of cheerleading and personal cheerleading stories.

Original Tone & Style

• Irreverent, Playfully Cruel, and Self-Deprecating: Both Jay and Bobby roast each other, themselves, and their friends. There’s a constant back-and-forth of ball-busting, sarcastic digs, and absurd confessions.
• Intimate and Relatable: The show’s humor is rooted in genuine friendship, mundane modern complications, nostalgia, and shared insecurities—whether about trucks, masculinity, or social circles.

Conclusion

This episode is peak Bonfire: a meandering, deeply funny group therapy session for comedians and comedy fans, where mall car lights, childhood trauma, professional frustration, and pop culture all blend into one of the funniest conversations you’ll hear about growing up and not growing old. If you’ve ever wanted to install questionable gadgets on your car, been intimidated by macho service guys, questioned your football loyalties, or just need a generous shot of self-aware, unfiltered banter—this is an essential listen.