Ufologists w/Dan St Germain & Sean Donnelly

Summary

Episode Summary: "Ufologists" featuring Dan St. Germain & Sean Donnelly

Podcast Information:

• Title: The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly
• Episode: Ufologists w/Dan St Germain & Sean Donnelly
• Release Date: May 1, 2025
• Description: In this episode, veteran comedians Big Jay Oakerson and Bobby Kelly host ufologists Dan St. Germain and Sean Donnelly. The conversation delves into the intriguing world of UFOs, alien theories, and the cultural impact of these phenomena, all interwoven with the hosts' signature humor and candid banter.

---

1. Introduction of Guests and Their Podcast

Timestamp: [01:45] - [02:16]

Bobby Kelly introduces the guests, Dan St. Germain and Sean Donnelly, co-hosts of the podcast Burbs Bros. Initially focused on suburban news, their show has evolved to concentrate on UFOs and paranormal activities.

• Sean Donnelly: "At first it started off as a suburban news podcast, and then I got obsessed with UFOs. So now it's paranormal."

They discuss their podcast's growth and the addition of UFO-related content, highlighting their recent guests like Ross Colhart and George Knapp.

2. Debating Belief in UFOs

Timestamp: [02:56] - [05:02]

Bobby Kelly questions the guests' stance on UFOs, leading to a robust debate on belief versus fact.

• Bobby Kelly: "Do you believe in UFOs?"
• Sean Donnelly: "It's not a matter of belief. It's fact."

Sean emphasizes that UFOs are a reality backed by data and congressional hearings, while Bobby shares his personal encounters driving on the West Side Highway, illustrating his firsthand experiences with unidentified objects.

• Bobby Kelly: "I've been driving up the west side highway for 25 years...and I've seen this thing and I believe it."

3. Personal Anecdotes and Evidence

Timestamp: [05:02] - [09:02]

Bobby delves deeper into his UFO sightings, describing the object's unique shape and behavior.

• Bobby Kelly: "I saw this thing and it just... I've seen every aircraft going up... and then I see this thing I've never seen 25 years."

The guests discuss the challenges of proving UFO encounters, with Bobby mentioning a photo he took as potential evidence.

• Bobby Kelly: "I took a photo of it and it was something."

4. Theories Behind UFO Cover-Ups

Timestamp: [09:02] - [17:37]

The conversation shifts to why governments might conceal UFO information. Various theories are proposed:

• Economic Motivations: Revealing UFO technology could disrupt current energy markets.

  • Big Jay Oakerson: "They've discovered zero net energy. We don't need fossil fuels anymore."

• Religious Implications: Disclosure might upheave established religions.

  • Bobby Kelly: "Is one of the reasons they don't want us to know... because it will mess up religion for people?"

• Advanced Technology Concerns: The existence of superior alien technology could challenge human advancements.

The guests reference notable incidents and whistleblowers, including David Grusch's congressional testimony, to substantiate their points.

• Sean Donnelly: "There’s a guy David Grusch who went in front of Congress under oath..."

5. Cultural Impact and Historical References

Timestamp: [17:37] - [25:33]

Dan and Sean explore historical UFO encounters, such as the Betty and Barney Hill abduction case from the 1960s, blending humor with analysis.

• Dan St. Germain: "Why are there no girls in the ufologyist place?"
• Bobby Kelly: "They have three tits."

The discussion includes how UFO narratives have been integrated into popular culture and religion, suggesting that ancient civilizations may have been influenced or assisted by extraterrestrial beings.

• Big Jay Oakerson: "It's a working theory that these things came down, gave the Egyptians the story of Horus..."

6. The Science and Psychology of UFO Belief

Timestamp: [25:33] - [31:43]

The hosts and guests delve into the psychological aspects of UFO sightings and abductions, referencing works by psychologists and the impact of media portrayal on public perception.

• Dan St. Germain: "He said, I'm gonna go to the bathroom. You wanna handle this one?"

The conversation highlights the intersection of belief, evidence, and cultural storytelling in shaping the UFO narrative.

7. Humorous Banter and Skits

Timestamp: [31:43] - [38:50]

Throughout the episode, the hosts intersperse serious discussions with comedic skits and playful teasing. Examples include:

• Christine's Dramatic Monologue: A mock sitcom scene where Christine expresses exaggerated sadness over Bobby's absence.

  • Christine: "I’m straight Tim. I just have a lot of feelings and I don't know what to do with them."

• Alien Theory Jokes: Playful exchanges about alien motivations and behaviors.

  • Dan St. Germain: "Seeing an alien would help."
  • Sean Donnelly: "Trust me."

These segments serve to entertain while still keeping the conversation engaging and relatable.

8. Closing Remarks and Upcoming Content

Timestamp: [38:50] - [34:19]

The episode concludes with promotions for upcoming shows and content related to UFO investigations, maintaining engagement with the audience.

• Big Jay Oakerson: "On next week's episode, Bobby and Jay tell the world Jacob's secret that Jacob likes guys."

The hosts encourage listeners to subscribe to their Patreon and promote their guests' upcoming events and specials, ensuring continued interest in UFO discourse.

---

Notable Quotes:

• Bobby Kelly [02:56]: "Do you believe in UFOs?"
• Sean Donnelly [02:59]: "It's not a matter of belief. It's fact."
• Bobby Kelly [04:46]: "I'm a ufologist."
• Sean Donnelly [17:37]: "There’s a multi-decade conspiracy that supersedes the government..."
• Big Jay Oakerson [23:23]: "Think aliens gave us religions to control us."
• Christine [38:35]: "I love them."
• Dan St. Germain [37:07]: "Maybe you have feelings."

---

Conclusion:

In this episode of The Bonfire, Big Jay Oakerson and Bobby Kelly engage with ufologists Dan St. Germain and Sean Donnelly to explore the complexities of UFO phenomena. The conversation oscillates between serious debate on the existence and governmental cover-ups of UFOs and lighthearted comedic exchanges, making the topic accessible and entertaining. Listeners gain insights into personal UFO encounters, theoretical motivations behind secrecy, and the cultural ramifications of extraterrestrial beliefs, all delivered with the hosts' characteristic humor and candidness.

Transcript

[Bobby Kelly]

Only the best will do for mom.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

So make Whole Foods Market your Mother's Day destination. Shop the floral department for vibrant blooms.

[Bobby Kelly]

Like tulips, orchids, peonies, and expert crafted bouquets.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Then head to the wellness and beauty department and give mom a spa like.

[Bobby Kelly]

Experience with scented candles and more. And if you're hosting brunch or dinner, order flavorful Whole Foods market catering by May 9.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Celebrate Mother's Day with Whole Foods Market in store and online.

[Bobby Kelly]

To realize the future America needs, we understand what's needed from us to face each threat head on. We've earned our place in the fight for our nation's future. We are marines. We were made for this.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

And now the bonfire with Big J Okerson and Robert Kelly.

[Bobby Kelly]

Check it out, everybody. Right now. Go to YouTube.com you have a mouthful.

[Dan St. Germain]

Of apple, slut knots it.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'm gonna do it. Like this is my only impression I do. Everybody go to YouTube.com and download.

[Dan St. Germain]

It's gonna shoot out of your mouth or what? It's gonna arc over the table and hit me.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's available now. It's one of the best specials. He does crowd work with people, but my son used to do it. He used to get up and do things.

[Dan St. Germain]

It's not about.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's about you. It's about them.

[Dan St. Germain]

It's about our guests.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's about them. No, go to. We didn't announce it and we need people to go.

[Dan St. Germain]

We'll do anything else to watch your special. Of course. We do it every day.

[Bobby Kelly]

Well, we didn't plug it and I want to plug it. Don't neg me.

[Dan St. Germain]

And whoa.

[Bobby Kelly]

Don't neglect me. Hard art. Don't you act like a orange peel.

[Dan St. Germain]

Okay?

[Bobby Kelly]

I'm trying to help you.

[Dan St. Germain]

Thank you.

[Bobby Kelly]

I love you.

[Dan St. Germain]

We have two great guests. Boys are back. That's what we say. Favorites over here at the bonfire, they have a new show, the burbs bros. @YouTube.com burbsbros it is the hilarious Dan St. Germain and Sean Donnelly. Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Hey, thank you. Appreciate it.

[Bobby Kelly]

I really like these two people.

[Dan St. Germain]

Of course. And they're Burbs bro. You guys both. Both live in the burbs now. Is that.

[Sean Donnelly]

No. At first it started off as a suburban news podcast, and then I got off. I got dan obsessed with UFOs. So now it's paranormal.

[Dan St. Germain]

Yeah.

[Sean Donnelly]

We just added a UFO to the graphic.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

We're gonna. Once we have money, we're gonna add stuff. But we've been getting the people in that. Anyone who's familiar with that space, we Had Ross Colhart. Just had George Knapp, who's like, you had nap on. Yeah, we had nap on yesterday. Did you know that? I was hoping I was open from the cigar. I'm more excited about this, these guys, than I am, you know, like at this point, meeting comedians, you know, because I'm so new to this field, you know, but yeah, Sean totally got me addicted to it. And we also didn't want to just be like, are you garbage light those two things together.

[Sean Donnelly]

I think that's exactly right.

[Bobby Kelly]

Do you. Can I ask you question? Do you believe in UFOs?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yes, absolutely.

[Sean Donnelly]

It's not a matter of belief. It's. It's fact.

[Bobby Kelly]

I want to say this because I was driving home one day, okay, on the.

[Dan St. Germain]

What?

[Bobby Kelly]

Can you please. Before you. Before you put your hand over your face and turn on this, let me tell the story. I was driving home on the west side highway and I saw a unidentified object flying in the air.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

How far above it was that?

[Dan St. Germain]

A bird's height?

[Bobby Kelly]

No, it was not a bird height. Made me spit apple on my screen. Jacob's gonna throw up. It was not a bird. It was not a shape of a bird. It was like spheres together. Multiple, huh?

[Sean Donnelly]

Multiple.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. I mean, it was too far away.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I resent these sound effects, Lou. By the way, as a member of the community, I'm already offended.

[Dan St. Germain]

Yeah, no, this is. These are audio recordings Bobby took that day. This is Bobby's E meter.

[Sean Donnelly]

Hey, I believe you, Bobby. I. I'm. I'm all for it.

[Bobby Kelly]

I just want to say this. I saw this thing and it just. I've been driving up the west side highway for 25 years, up and down that highway, and I've seen a Stealth fighter. I've seen Chinooks. I've seen, you know, bombers, you know, all this weird stuff flying up the highway. All these weird planes. Like, you see. You can't help but see it because it's so. The sky is right there and it's. And all of a sudden I see this thing I've never seen 25 years. And I took a photo of it and it was something. Yeah, it was something.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You saw the photo?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. Well, someone has it and. And I. I took the photo and I was like, that is something. That is not a bird. That is not. And then all of a sudden, the last plane.

[Dan St. Germain]

It's not Superman. We whittle it down to not being those three things, but we don't know.

[Bobby Kelly]

This is the problem. Doing a radio show with a non believer Jacob, He's a non believer to the point.

[Sean Donnelly]

You guys did a live one once and I came on and then. And then Jacob tried to me as an alien or something.

[Bobby Kelly]

Jacob likes aliens too.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Well, I believe you, Bobby.

[Bobby Kelly]

I swear I got a photo of it. Here's the thing now, all of a sudden, in the last year, what's happening up down the west side highway, what's going on in Jersey? Everybody's seeing shit. Yeah.

[Dan St. Germain]

If this was. If the stuff was real and I don't know, I'm no smarter than anybody who has probably better rationales for there is Don, real quick. Oh, yeah. This question. I'm very sorry.

[Bobby Kelly]

Hey, really quick, Don, you're on the radio. Can you hear? I can hear me. We can hear you. Jay would like to ask you a question or he has something to say to you. You've been waiting all this time.

[Dan St. Germain]

We have asked me a question.

[Bobby Kelly]

Go ahead.

[Dan St. Germain]

We have, yes. Bobby was saying today on the show that he feels that you and I are far more similar and compatible. And then he and Christine he feels are much more alike and compatible.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'm gonna say really what I said is you're cold hearted and me and Christine are connected to our emotions. More is more. What I meant that we actually love and have affection and show emotion and you guys like, yeah, whatever.

[Dan St. Germain]

Deal with it, Dawn.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, that's fantastic.

[Dan St. Germain]

Christine. Christine called me today.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'm not manic. Did you just call Christine, man? I mean, you're on the mic. She is on medication. We've been through that. I. Jay.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That's her diagnosis.

[Bobby Kelly]

Jay, Jay. Jay has a question for you. Listen up.

[Dan St. Germain]

Your husband Robert jokingly suggested a wife swap situation for a set period of time. My concern would be that I think you and I would have a sexual awakening and it would cause long term problems in both of our relationships.

[Sean Donnelly]

No deal.

[Dan St. Germain]

Oh, she loves you, Bobby.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That's a real lateral move for her, you know, that's a real. You want to either get out of comedy or go up.

[Dan St. Germain]

I know we're all having a good time here, but I'm pretty good at mouth stuff is all I'm saying.

[Bobby Kelly]

All right, honey, I love you.

[Dan St. Germain]

Your relationship safe.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'll talk to you later.

[Christine]

Okay.

[Bobby Kelly]

All right. I had a sex dream, a love dream about Kelly Clock and I'll tell you that. Bye.

[Sean Donnelly]

Let's be honest. Everybody in the show looks like the Guess who game of the same guy.

[Dan St. Germain]

Does he have glasses?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, it's just like a. Create a character, you alter a hat. You're like, ah, this is him in Green.

[Dan St. Germain]

My, My. My argument against. To go back to where we were. My argument against the alien stuff being real is I just like, how could they hide it? So it's like. It's just like, to me, you couldn't stop people from finding out, really, if it was real. Like, you couldn't distract us enough from that being the most important thing in the world.

[Sean Donnelly]

So there's tons of evidence for it being real. They basically admitted they had two congressional hearings where they were like, it's for real. The Navy's come out and been like, we're seeing.

[Bobby Kelly]

There's.

[Sean Donnelly]

These things are completely for real. They have tons and tons of data.

[Dan St. Germain]

Is there any. Not, not. Not debunked ones at all?

[Sean Donnelly]

There's a ton that's not debunked. Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

If you look at the Richard Dolan books or the dolls.

[Dan St. Germain]

Robert.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's Hastings, right? The guy who wrote UFOs and nuclear weapons. It's. These aren't theories. This isn't like David Icke espousing. These are incidents. That's it. Like, they're just reporting what happened. But in Jay's defense, I will say this. It took me about four and a half years before someone actually called me a comedian. I had to do, like, Fallon right before. People were like, all right, you're a comedian. I've been called a ufologist. Immediately. There was no waiting period.

[Dan St. Germain]

People are immediate, Lieutenant.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I've immediately become the ufologist.

[Bobby Kelly]

Dan, can I ask a question, Dan? Since I saw one, and I believe am I.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Well, the reason that I'm on the podcast is. Bobby, we have some special news for you. You have become a ufologist.

[Dan St. Germain]

You'll be getting your badge.

[Sean Donnelly]

Your territory is west side Highway.

[Christine]

Your picture. Can they see your picture?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, I. I don't. You want to find it?

[Sean Donnelly]

If you can find it, that'd be great. Well, here's the thing. You saw this thing. It was great.

[Bobby Kelly]

You have it looking.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I'm looking.

[Bobby Kelly]

Okay.

[Sean Donnelly]

So, yeah, the UFO nukes connection. Is that the idea that these things started showing up when we started testing nuclear bombs? Because whatever it was showed up on their radar. The amount of power involved. Show up on their radar. That's where you get Roswell. What they don't tell you about Roswell is that for. For years prior, they were testing nuclear bombs. That area for. For the past, whenever they developed the actual.

[Dan St. Germain]

That was the whole thing out there.

[Sean Donnelly]

It was the whole area. Yeah, exactly.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's the monkey with a gun theory, where these beings are way more advanced than us, but the Fact that we were able to pull off nuclear war. They're like, how the fuck did they do this? You know, like, we didn't see this coming. We didn't see this monkey being able to do this. So that's, that's why they're here. They're basically seeing what we're up to.

[Sean Donnelly]

And we're not going to stuff that's come out in the, like, you went, you went from it being like X Files type scenario. New York Times reporting on it.

[Dan St. Germain]

Why are they always also evil faced? There's not one that's cute. They never have a drawing of one that's so like, oh, look at that adorable alien. It's either a black smoky cloud or a menacing thing that turns or everyone sees it turn around in green lighting like Jake.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

There's a, there's a fucking good, good advertiser for our episode that premieres tonight at midnight. Dr. Michael Masters. He is the aliens or future humans theory.

[Bobby Kelly]

Mm.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yes. You can check them out the mmm store. But the reason, Jay, they look like that is the facial features are coming closer and closer together. And if you look at Neanderthals, their features there. And then we came back here. So aliens will be right in the.

[Bobby Kelly]

Middle one in Mexico that they found the alien. That's just a, that's just from Carvel.

[Sean Donnelly]

Just fudge the whale.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, alien. It's actually just, yeah, alien puss. It just looks like a girl with an eating disorder. It looks like water flip oil.

[Sean Donnelly]

It's just Karen Carpenter.

[Bobby Kelly]

Sharon. It's Sharon Osborne. But here, here's the thing. I, I, I sent her the photo. Now if you look at this, now know this. I'm driving up the west side Highway. This thing is moving like parallel to.

[Dan St. Germain]

Me the opposite way. What, at the speed of a bird?

[Bobby Kelly]

It's not a bird.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Back to the photo.

[Sean Donnelly]

That's the Nazca.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No, that's nascar. Yeah, no, but did you pull up Jay's. Was that Jay?

[Bobby Kelly]

No, she had my photo. I sent it to her. She had it up.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, can you, can I look at the photo again? Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Sean Donnelly]

So you're driving up and it's parallel to you on, on the west side.

[Bobby Kelly]

So I'm driving up, now I see it and I'm like, that's weird. And now I see it's moving right this way, Bobby. And.

[Dan St. Germain]

Then your radio station started changing.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's, it's that.

[Dan St. Germain]

Didn't your, didn't your radio start speaking to you in song lyrics like bumblebee right up.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, there it is right there. Okay, Go a little closer.

[Sean Donnelly]

So here's the thing. They. So now they have this.

[Bobby Kelly]

What?

[Christine]

The bird.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

The bird is like one of the sky watchers.

[Bobby Kelly]

That's not a bird. That is not a bird. A bird would do this. I would see the wings.

[Dan St. Germain]

All right, it's not a plane.

[Bobby Kelly]

Bird does this.

[Dan St. Germain]

But before it's a ufo. It is Superman.

[Bobby Kelly]

Okay, first, just try this because it's real fun.

[Dan St. Germain]

It's a bird.

[Bobby Kelly]

A bird does this. Do this.

[Sean Donnelly]

So they have a thing where they. They classify these things with the five observables and what they. What they realize they've been seeing things that are. Have no obvious signs of exhaust or propulsion, and they're going at the weird, erratic directions and speed. No wings as well. There's a.

[Bobby Kelly]

There's a few other ones, but this thing stopped. It was going and stopped. Right. Which was wild. And then it's. Yeah, and then it just kind of went. It started going, but it was weird.

[Dan St. Germain]

It was like, it's not a bird. I see. Now go closer on that again. It's a bunch of balloons.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's not. It's not balloons.

[Dan St. Germain]

This is several children's balloons.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's not a balloon.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Dude.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's not a balloon.

[Sean Donnelly]

A lot of times these types of things change shape. They have videos of that. You ever see the one.

[Dan St. Germain]

Wait a second. I think it's the Pink Floyd pig.

[Sean Donnelly]

First of all, as a Filming the.

[Bobby Kelly]

As a UFO ologist, this is insulting to our.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Thank you, Dr. Kelly.

[Bobby Kelly]

Thank you very much. Am I. Did I get doctored?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yes.

[Dan St. Germain]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's rare.

[Dan St. Germain]

We get. It's rare because it's rare we get this many scientific minds in the room. I get.

[Bobby Kelly]

I, I. I just want to. I want to apologize.

[Dan St. Germain]

I get jealous. I want Inferior academically.

[Sean Donnelly]

Hey, you all. Joking aside, the podcast is weekly.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's every week. Okay? But you guys understand what I'm saying. I've driven up that highway and seen every aircraft, whatever it is, going up.

[Dan St. Germain]

And, you know, see a hot air balloon.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Would you come on our show, Bobby?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. With my evidence. Yeah.

[Dan St. Germain]

As a survivor. Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'm not. I didn't survive anything.

[Dan St. Germain]

Sure you did.

[Bobby Kelly]

They're not here to hurt us.

[Dan St. Germain]

You saw it. That thing could have swooped right in on you.

[Bobby Kelly]

Now, I. Because I. Up in New Hampshire.

[Dan St. Germain]

They're not here to hurt us. Is that what they told you through song lyrics on your radio?

[Bobby Kelly]

They're not. Then up in New Hampshire. I hate that. You are not. You're insulting our guests.

[Sean Donnelly]

So nothing Would nothing would convince you, Jay. Nothing would.

[Dan St. Germain]

Seeing an alien would help.

[Sean Donnelly]

That's.

[Dan St. Germain]

Seeing a sharp, not blurry picture in the era of 16K television.

[Bobby Kelly]

So you know the couple had 4.

[Sean Donnelly]

Billion iPhones on the planet. I hear you, Sean. You're not helping our case.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, no, no.

[Dan St. Germain]

You.

[Sean Donnelly]

I get it. But dude, you don't know there is.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

We have a pat.

[Bobby Kelly]

Shut up. I'm joining tonight.

[Dan St. Germain]

Thank you.

[Bobby Kelly]

As Dr. Kelly.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Thank you.

[Dan St. Germain]

I'm very interested.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

If you get the 10 tier I draw you an alien picture.

[Bobby Kelly]

Actually I'll give you sign photos of my alien ship if you join their patreon.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Thank you very much. Tier which we haven't announced.

[Dan St. Germain]

Listen, I have a hippie dip. I said we were out back last night. Look at. We finally have stars in Jersey. And looking up and having those. It's like infinite universe man. It's also crazy out there. So who the hell knows? I just feel like if we were. I'm not saying it's impossible they exist. My belief is they probably do exist somewhere. I just think if there was contact made in any way, like why would this be hidden forever?

[Sean Donnelly]

Because there's a lot of theories on that.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, there's a lot of theories. What if they created.

[Dan St. Germain]

It's as silly to me as. Let me say it's as silly to me as when people go Whenever I've had flat earth stuff which is nonsense also people bringing flat earth. Why My first argument to that is simply right there is that why is flat earth nonsense?

[Bobby Kelly]

Why would you say that?

[Dan St. Germain]

Stop it. Stop it.

[Bobby Kelly]

I will. Because I can't do that.

[Sean Donnelly]

Dr. Kelly's losing his credentials.

[Dan St. Germain]

They could answer to you. Why they think it. They could do. But when you say and this is all things been covered up. Okay, that's the never answer. Quit. Why it changes fucking nothing in anybody's life.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Clearly.

[Dan St. Germain]

He goes I'm gonna go to the bathroom. You wanna handle this one?

[Sean Donnelly]

Hold my beer.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Sean starts roll up.

[Dan St. Germain]

I was hoping it wouldn here.

[Bobby Kelly]

They.

[Sean Donnelly]

Around and found out.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Take that away.

[Sean Donnelly]

So the reason you come to me sideways real quick. There's multiple reasons. One what Dan mentioned already is like the. It's the ant with the handgun theory where it's like we don't contact ants and ants see in like one dimension. These things are from a different dimension or somewhere else. We're not such a dick.

[Bobby Kelly]

I can feel it.

[Sean Donnelly]

I can feel him next to me.

[Bobby Kelly]

Buddy, I am.

[Sean Donnelly]

Oh, you're being.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, you're a reaction dude. I am with the ant in the hangout. Theory.

[Sean Donnelly]

That's right.

[Bobby Kelly]

100%. Okay.

[Sean Donnelly]

Okay.

[Bobby Kelly]

I have a whole bunch of ants pants on my lawn now. They don't care about me. They don't even know I'm here.

[Dan St. Germain]

By the way, this is always. This is a funny thing that it's. I know they're not your theories, but it's always funny. It's a Rogan. When you hear on the Rogan sphere a lot, if somebody come in, the theory's always got a hilarious name. It's like the thing and a thing. It's like you never heard the Donkey Banana theory. What's that? He goes donkey the banana, blah blah blah. The Bible.

[Bobby Kelly]

Can I ask a question? Is one of the, the, one of the reasons they don't want us to know about this is because it will, it will mess up religion for people?

[Sean Donnelly]

That's one of them, right?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That's one of them. I think the big reason I think is the power source is there. They've discovered these things, have discovered zero net energy. We don't need fossil fuels anymore. A lot of billionaires aren't going to be billionaires anymore.

[Dan St. Germain]

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[Bobby Kelly]

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[Sean Donnelly]

Absolutely.

[Bobby Kelly]

Off of the ants.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah.

[Dan St. Germain]

And choosing one of the billionaires decisions is also to Keep quiet, goes, hey, listen, listen, there are aliens, but that is going to fuck up your coal company.

[Sean Donnelly]

Well, one of the whistleblowers, the recent ones is this guy David Grusch. He went in front of Congress under oath and said, and he said how there's been a multi decade conspiracy that supersedes the government for all these, basically these NAFTA countries, these democratic countries, to be the first one who figures out whatever this technology is that these things can do. This is anti gravity, whatever you want.

[Bobby Kelly]

To call it, pyramids. They just discovered all this stuff underneath them. And, and then you go down and you look at the pyramids and how they got this stuff from 200 miles away in these things with just men. They had to have some type of.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's the biggest question, right? I think, I think it's part. That's one we're never gonna like answer. But why is it, and Sean's brought this up. Why is it that, you know, you had the most advanced civilization in the world in this particular point in the area, and then just a continent away, they've got, you know, stones and rocks and they can't, you know, like, they're just so much more advanced. Their irrigation and agricultural systems. It doesn't really make any sense other than they had some help unless somebody.

[Bobby Kelly]

From some other universe came here, planted these. Us.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yes.

[Bobby Kelly]

And grew us as they see fit and gave us knowledge as we needed it.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Well, there's, there is a, there is a working theory that these things.

[Dan St. Germain]

The chimpanzee pickle theory.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

This is the xylophone manatee theory, the Nap crushing theory. This is the.

[Bobby Kelly]

This is the, this.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Is the oboe muskrat.

[Bobby Kelly]

I, I'm sorry, I thought you were doing the Chick Fil a Polynesian sauce theory. That's my favorite theory.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

There is a theory that they came down, gave the Egyptians the story of Horus, which is the basis for the three major Abrahamic religions. Islam, Christianity, Judaism. It all stems from that, you know, specifically.

[Dan St. Germain]

You can hear a lot of this in the. Corey Feldman's Son's Hip Hop Works, who has named himself.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Wait, Corey Feldman is a son?

[Dan St. Germain]

Yeah, his name is. His rapping name is Horace Eisen. His name is Zen and he's doing Horace's eye Zen. So it's Horace Eisen. It's not easy to say and it still sounds Jewish. He's running from Feldman.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Change it to Dylan.

[Dan St. Germain]

He's running from Feldman by going Horus Eisen.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

He's like, my rap name is Zip Zimmerman.

[Dan St. Germain]

But young Flash Rabinowitz Religion was.

[Bobby Kelly]

Created to control us, to help us, give us a compass, a moral compass, so that we. We don't get beat.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You know, it's the pat nozzle thing. We don't beat each other to death.

[Bobby Kelly]

Right. So they gave us all these different religions to control us, to help us, so that we can.

[Dan St. Germain]

And once people, black people, were like, why would these white people's God have to me, he goes, oh, there's a black God too. And the Indians were worried. He goes, oh, you gotta have an elephant God. Whatever you want. Whatever you want.

[Bobby Kelly]

You have to. You mean the. The lady with 19 arms?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

McDonald's. You can get, you know, ramen in Japan. Right? You know, like, so maybe they have a different. It's a different. You know, even when it comes to.

[Sean Donnelly]

These cultures, you've seen these drawings that are like. That kind of looks like an alien. It's not that. What is it?

[Bobby Kelly]

They in. In some of the. The artwork on the walls inside the pyramid, they have aliens.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

I just discovered this, I think last year or the year before up in New Hampshire. I forget what town it is. Right, right, right. By us. There was a couple back in the 50s. Yeah.

[Sean Donnelly]

Betty and Barney Hill.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, that's it. Biracial couple, by the way, Back then, and they were traveling on a road and they got abducted by aliens. And it's.

[Dan St. Germain]

Yeah, it's.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That has to be.

[Dan St. Germain]

Hey, were those aliens? They happen to be wearing robes with pointy hats.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I have a whole chunk. I just started doing a whole new Betty and Barney Hill chunk in my actual. And is that when they get abducted? They're relieved. They're like, oh, thank God it's just aliens. That's basically the bit. But there's no way. But the fucking bit. But the point of that bit, Sean, is that in 1961 in Boston, what interracial couple wants more attention? First of all.

[Bobby Kelly]

First of all, they went way up to New Hampshire to do this. They wouldn't have done this in Boston.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

But they still have to go back to Massachusetts.

[Dan St. Germain]

Now, my mama told me that my problem was I said, you messing around with a white, you gonna get abduct.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I said, every single picture of Barney Hill. He looks scared. That's how I know it's true.

[Bobby Kelly]

He's a good looking guy. I mean, she's a beast.

[Dan St. Germain]

Looks like Teddy Smith. He looks like Will Smith there.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That was. I gotta see. We gotta watch the James Earl Jones movie for the pod.

[Bobby Kelly]

Look at that. That looks like Mark. She looks like Mark Marin with a wig.

[Dan St. Germain]

That looks like Staples Center.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Mark is way more handsome than she is.

[Bobby Kelly]

You say the ship was his staples?

[Dan St. Germain]

Yeah. He goes, goes. Now you're going to put the. The field's going to be in set.

[Bobby Kelly]

This is so gonna be.

[Dan St. Germain]

And I'm gonna call it so fasting. He's crazy. It's the Boston Garden. It's gonna be the Boston Garden.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

We all know Jay's funny, but that's not the point of this.

[Dan St. Germain]

It does not make me right.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I will say disclaimers, funny skits, Jay, but we're trying to get to the truth.

[Dan St. Germain]

I'm funny, but I. I'm probably not right. Right. Do not take my word as gold.

[Sean Donnelly]

Well, they Also the article they probably mentioned, they put them under hypnosis and they started describing exactly what happened to them on the ship.

[Bobby Kelly]

If you. I listened to the whole. They have a big documentary on YouTube and it is pretty wild because back then, this guy. Why. What was he going to do? Why are they doing this? For what? There's no reason. They're not gaining anything. Absolutely. If anything, they're actually bringing attention to them when they didn't want to.

[Sean Donnelly]

Right.

[Dan St. Germain]

And N word lover.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Part of the bit where. Where I go. Imagine if they're more racist up there. Are you here to study? It's just keeping you away from our women.

[Dan St. Germain]

Wife.

[Bobby Kelly]

We thought we took care of that Gene.

[Dan St. Germain]

This planet's out of control.

[Sean Donnelly]

I love how the alien took care of that. The alien's racist, but it still says N word.

[Bobby Kelly]

Don't go near his belly button or anus.

[Sean Donnelly]

He's like, I don't want you mixing with races. But I'm not a monster.

[Dan St. Germain]

At least they're not gay.

[Bobby Kelly]

Why does this black guy have a Boston accent? It's weird.

[Dan St. Germain]

Yeah. Why does this say anything?

[Bobby Kelly]

Come over here, you clock suckers. He talks funny.

[Dan St. Germain]

Are there. Are there working theories about why it's always somehow ass? Because that's just our only hole into our body besides our mouths.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Well, it's not just. I mean, the ass ones get the most attention, but they.

[Sean Donnelly]

That's what your soul is kept in your colon. That's what it comes to.

[Bobby Kelly]

Mine is.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

But they do.

[Dan St. Germain]

It's.

[Bobby Kelly]

I have a tattoo. That's his soul.

[Dan St. Germain]

Yeah. He goes, bobby, sing from your soul.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

In tonight I'm reading John Max Book, who is a Harvard psychologist.

[Bobby Kelly]

Max is the best.

[Dan St. Germain]

I'll take his word for it.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Harvard psychologist.

[Sean Donnelly]

Dead now, but.

[Dan St. Germain]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

But it seems as if abductions they are concentrated on either your brain or the genitals. It doesn't seem like they give a. About your respiratory system or gastrointestinal stuff now.

[Bobby Kelly]

Now do they?

[Dan St. Germain]

That's also what gays are interested in. Your head and your genitals, which is also.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

They like the guts too.

[Sean Donnelly]

That's a. If you're a gay autistic, the aliens love you. That's another theory.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That's another thing.

[Sean Donnelly]

Women, the psionic. The telepathic ones. That's. That's the new one.

[Dan St. Germain]

Oh, I thought they were like puppies and they'll just go wherever you tell them to go. We are drop a ramp out of your ship.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

All this is real. We're interviewing next week. We're interviewing a psychic medium employed by the CIA. Okay. This is not like somebody like in Long island, all right? This is the real.

[Bobby Kelly]

First of all, you're never going to get become a doctor and you're not going to become a ufo. What am I again?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Ufologist.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'm a ufo.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I don't even know how to fucking say. How do we say it?

[Sean Donnelly]

How do we know she's employed by the CIA?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Did you meet him?

[Bobby Kelly]

You told us. That's right. And how do you. How do you know.

[Dan St. Germain]

Shut up, Sean.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You're us again. We're trying to get this Patreon up the grid.

[Sean Donnelly]

C. She has an email at C.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

We've been on 20 different TV shows and they haven't hit. We need this.

[Bobby Kelly]

I think this is the one. D. D's flipping out. Dan. Settle down. Dan, Get a hold of your.

[Sean Donnelly]

Holy.

[Bobby Kelly]

Dan just went full heel.

[Sean Donnelly]

That Jim Dungan real.

[Dan St. Germain]

I think it's a fantastic commercial for the show.

[Bobby Kelly]

He just said that. Business.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Wrestling business.

[Bobby Kelly]

Ah, come on, dude. It's a good business. Did you like Wrestlemania? That's.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I don't know, Bobby. I was fired.

[Dan St. Germain]

Do you think we were watching.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I thought the.

[Bobby Kelly]

Well, you went from real wrestling to UFOs, so there you go.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Something more real. No, I thought the ending was a letdown for sure. You know, Total letdown. But yeah, I also. I think there's a lot of politics involved in that too.

[Bobby Kelly]

Is there. Is there behind the scenes, like stuff they don't do stuff that they should do because of. Bullshit.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's all bullshit. Yeah, dude, it's. It's. It's. It's a far pettier world than comedy than UFOs. UFOs a good world. UFOs a better world than comedy and wrestling.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Dan St. Germain]

Both.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

We welcome everyone.

[Dan St. Germain]

Both of them. Light on ch.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

The ufologist will never have a me too scandal.

[Dan St. Germain]

Oh, buddy.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's medically impossible for them to have.

[Dan St. Germain]

One on the flat earth. Remember that flat earth documentary we watched years ago? There was one girl who was like relatively attractive and she was like, they all. Didn't matter what she said. They were just all following her. They couldn't believe a girl was involved following. She's like, I think flat earth flat because it's a cooler shape. And they're like, that's also a good reason why.

[Bobby Kelly]

Why are there no girls in the ufologyist place?

[Sean Donnelly]

Well, there are. They just have three tits.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's the chick from a bar and Total recall.

[Bobby Kelly]

I've always thought that was hot.

[Dan St. Germain]

The third tits.

[Bobby Kelly]

Ah, three tits would be so much better than two.

[Dan St. Germain]

I want it dead center like that. We gotta wrap.

[Bobby Kelly]

We gotta wrap it up now.

[Dan St. Germain]

We have to commercial some it.

[Bobby Kelly]

They got a brand new podcast. Jay, tell them about it.

[Dan St. Germain]

Burbs Bros. YouTube.com Bros they have a Patreon also.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Patreon.com Ross Coldheart Episode's awesome.

[Bobby Kelly]

What tier should they go to?

[Sean Donnelly]

It's only. There's only one right now.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Well, there's two.

[Bobby Kelly]

God damn it.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Sorry.

[Bobby Kelly]

Sorry.

[Dan St. Germain]

Make sure you check out that Patreon sign up. Up. Very, very funny guys, man. And, and. But some serious subjects we're gonna get to the bottom of. They're interviewing some pretty heavy hitters in the world. Yeah, no, it's.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It is. It is comedy. But we are. We do have heavy hitters on this.

[Dan St. Germain]

Hell yeah. You can catch Dan St. Germain in Milford, Connecticut, May 8th. For tickets and all their tour dates go to dan saint germain.net and Sean Donnelly is going to be at Soul Joel's this Saturday, April 26th. For tickets go to Soul Joel's dot com. Thank you guys so much for being here, man.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Thank you, man.

[Dan St. Germain]

Big J, this weekend I'm in Tulsa. You're in North Kakalac.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'm in North Carolina at the.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

We're in Northy.

[Bobby Kelly]

Where am I?

[Dan St. Germain]

Charlotte.

[Bobby Kelly]

Charlotte.

[Sean Donnelly]

Oh, nice.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, Comedy zone. This is the greatest, man.

[Dan St. Germain]

Are you gonna say Charlottesville? That's where your heart's at.

[Bobby Kelly]

All Comedy Zone.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Charlottesville.

[Bobby Kelly]

First time there and the ticket sales are showing that.

[Dan St. Germain]

No. I guess the Jews are replacing you.

[Bobby Kelly]

I guess. I guess this Yankee's not popular down there. God damn it. Yeah, make sure you go there and check out Big J special right now. It's on YouTube at YouTube.com bigjok epic J Okerson. They. It's killing it part two. It's killing it. So there you go. We'll be Right back.

[Dan St. Germain]

And we will all be right back. We'll catch you guys, enjoy the pre record tomorrow.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

And then can you get Christine. Can you get us her contact?

[Dan St. Germain]

Oh, the three Boo woman.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That's our third Patreon tier.

[Dan St. Germain]

That's a. That's a more perfectly sharp picture than any picture of an alien I've ever seen.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

God damn it, Jay.

[Dan St. Germain]

And absolutely. We'll catch you guys Monday again live on the bonfire. Until then, enjoy the pre record.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Awesome.

[Bobby Kelly]

So I didn't understand this weekend that you told me that Jacob likes guys and I didn't understand his.

[Dan St. Germain]

Jacob loves guys.

[Bobby Kelly]

Jacob loves guys. That's right. Jacob loves guys.

[Christine]

I love them.

[Bobby Kelly]

So we have a. We have a sitcom that we. Further Ado starring Big J. Okinson as Tim Butterly.

[Dan St. Germain]

Okay.

[Bobby Kelly]

And Jacob playing Jacob himself. Here we go. He's looking angry. He's feeling shy. And we know why.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No.

[Bobby Kelly]

Why? Jacob loves guys.

[Dan St. Germain]

Jacob loves guys.

[Christine]

Those ass cheeks.

[Dan St. Germain]

Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes.

[Christine]

I love it when a guy compliments my vibe.

[Dan St. Germain]

Jacob Love Scott.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Jacob Love's Guys was filmed in front of a live studio audience. Interior, comedy club, New York City. The green room is mostly empty except.

[Dan St. Germain]

For Jacob slouched on the couch, arms.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Crossed, looking like someone just stole his favorite action figure. Tim walks in, sipping from a bottle of water.

[Dan St. Germain]

What's with the face, Jacob? You look like someone just told you Die Hard's not a Christmas movie.

[Christine]

You really leave?

[Dan St. Germain]

Yeah, man, I told you last week. I'm moving to Austin. Got that writin gig, remember?

[Christine]

Yeah, but I didn't think you'd actually do it. And Die Hard is absolutely a Christmas movie.

[Dan St. Germain]

What, you thought I was gonna stay here forever just to watch you cry when the diner runs out of fries?

[Christine]

No, I just thought, I don't know, that maybe you'd change your mind or the universe would stop you or like, your car would explode.

[Dan St. Germain]

Yo, you wanted my car to explode.

[Christine]

Not with you in it.

[Dan St. Germain]

Okay, relax.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Jesus.

[Dan St. Germain]

Look, I get it. When Dan and Shane left, you were the same way.

[Christine]

I was not.

[Dan St. Germain]

You just emotionally collapsed into Wendy's parking lot and tried to fight a trash can.

[Christine]

Yeah, that sounds like me.

[Dan St. Germain]

Point is, it sucked. You got over it. And hey, you made new friends like Bobby. And you still have Jay.

[Christine]

I don't want new friends. I hate people. And Jay is slowly transitioning into a middle aged lesbian. I like Bobby, but Bobby is not Dan. You're one of the only people I don't want the throat punch on sight.

[Dan St. Germain]

Aw, that's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.

[Christine]

Don't make this sentimental, man.

[Dan St. Germain]

I'm just saying maybe there's more to this. Like, maybe you have feelings.

[Christine]

What the hell is that?

[Sean Donnelly]

Trust me.

[Dan St. Germain]

Feelings?

[Christine]

What the hell is that supposed to mean?

[Dan St. Germain]

Maybe, just maybe you might like guys.

[Christine]

No, I don't.

[Dan St. Germain]

Hey, no judgment. It's 2025, man. You can cry over your boy leaving and still be straight. Or at least buy curious.

[Christine]

I'm not bi curious. I'm just friend sad. There's a difference.

[Dan St. Germain]

Okay, okay. Friend sad. Got it.

[Christine]

I just don't want you to go. Who's gonna make fun of my outfits or finish my fries when I pretend I'm on a diet?

[Dan St. Germain]

You mean when you say you're on a diet with a cheeseburger in your mouth?

[Christine]

Yes, that's our thing.

[Dan St. Germain]

We'll still talk, man. Call, text, FaceTime.

[Christine]

I don't want digital Tim. I want real life Tim. I want Wednesday night wingman Tim. I want accidentally brought the same shoes Tim.

[Dan St. Germain]

You're literally crying like a five year old whose balloon floated away.

[Christine]

I miss you and you're not even gone yet.

[Dan St. Germain]

Okay, now I kind of believe you're straight. This is way too dramatic to be romantic, dick.

[Christine]

I'm straight Tim. I just have a lot of feelings and I don't know what to do with them.

[Dan St. Germain]

Dude, I love you too.

[Christine]

Don't say that unless you mean it.

[Dan St. Germain]

I mean it, man.

[Christine]

Can I have a juice box?

[Bobby Kelly]

What?

[Christine]

I don't know. It just feels like a juice box moment.

[Dan St. Germain]

I'll get you a juice box, buddy. Tim exits to find a juice box. Jacob curls up on the couch like a heartbroken toddler.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'm not gay.

[Christine]

I just. I'm just emotionally attached to a guy who smells like cedar wood and always carries gum. Totally straight.

[Bobby Kelly]

Jacob loves guys. He's looking fly. He's flying. Feeling high.

[Sean Donnelly]

And here's why.

[Bobby Kelly]

Jacob loves guys.

[Christine]

I sure do.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

On next week's episode, Bobby and Jay tell the world Jacob's secret that Jacob likes guys.

[Bobby Kelly]

I love them.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Thursday night at 8, only on NBC.

[Christine]

Can I say that was great, Bobby.

[Katie Nolan]

I'm Katie Nolan and I have a new podcast called Casuals. It's a podcast for people who like sports a normal amount. Casuals is a twice a week hang with me and my friends from across comedy, sports and entertainment where we talk about all the funny, weird, interesting stuff happening in and around the world of sports. So whether you're a die hard fan or just vaguely sports Curious Casuals is the podcast for you. You can find casuals on the SiriusXM app, Pandora, or wherever you get your podcasts. And don't forget to follow the show so you never miss an episode. Give it a try. What's the worst that could happen?

[Dan St. Germain]

The wrongs we must right. The fights we must win. The future we must secure together for our nation. This is what's in front of us. This determines what's next for all of us. We are Marines. We were made for this.