Boss Moves & Breaking Points: Black Women, Business & Boundaries

Summary

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The Breakfast Club – Boss Moves & Breaking Points: Black Women, Business & Boundaries

Date: May 7, 2026
Hosts: Lauren LaRosa (moderator), Melissa Butler (Founder of The Lip Bar), Janae (Entrepreneur/Content Creator, 12PM Studios), with voices from Wheezy (Health Advocate), Dr. Jay Barnett, and Kal Penn.

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Episode Overview

This episode dives into the unique experiences of Black women in entrepreneurship—balancing visibility, personal well-being, boundaries, and the real challenges of scaling a community-driven business. Lauren LaRosa moderates a candid, unscripted discussion between Melissa Butler and Janae, touching on hustle culture, self-care, the pressure to be ever-present, resilience after setbacks, and the morality and community dynamics that come into play when Black women find business success.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Reality of Showing Up: Visibility vs. Boundaries

• Authentic Presence:

  • Both panelists discuss what it means to constantly represent their brands, both online and offline.
  • Janae observes that being “on” is intrinsic to her business, but she strictly manages her energy and time for self-renewal.
    • Quote (Janae, 06:02):
      “I’m a huge proponent of just like knowing what I need when I need it... I have slow mornings... I don’t talk on the phone all day... I have to work. I feel like being aware of what you have to give people, and when you need to kind of, like, rest.”

• Boundaries as Self-Preservation:

  • Melissa opens up about the need for clear boundaries after years in hustle culture.
    • Quote (Melissa, 08:13):
      “In that breaking point, I just created serious boundaries. I’m like, oh, I don’t work after 5 o’clock anymore. I don’t work on the weekends. When I’m tired, I’m comfortable saying I’m tired. When I don’t want to show up, I say no.”

• The Unlearning of Hustle:

  • Both reflect on the process of unlearning the expectation to be endlessly productive, especially moving from corporate backgrounds into entrepreneurship.
    • Janae (08:43): “It’s a lot of unlearning from my previous career... I would have to tell myself it’s okay to take a break.”

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2. Wellness, Breaking Points & Self-Worth

• Coming Back From the Brink:

  • Melissa recounts her “breaking point,” emphasizing self-worth and the courage to prioritize her own wellness.
    • Quote (Melissa, 14:37):
      “It was really that I’m worthy... I had the nerve to serve. I had the nerve to center Black women. I had the nerve to say that our beauty was enough... You have to have that same nerve to love yourself enough to show up for yourself.”

• Defiance Against Harmful Norms:

  • The episode underscores defying societal expectations of Black women always putting others first (families, communities).
    • Quote (Melissa, 15:47):
      “It was a moment of defiance. It was a moment of defying what the world said success looked like.”

• Owning Your Off Switch:

  • Janae discusses how as a social-media-facing business owner, she strategically chooses when to be “on” versus when to preserve energy:
    • Quote (Janae, 16:46):
      “I know when I need to be on... If I’m going to Tyson’s Corner, I’m gonna see the queens… I need to make sure I look ready for photos. Or if I don’t got it that day, then I need to stay home...”

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3. The Path to Success: Authenticity Over Imitation

• Multiple Paths, Not One Formula:

  • Melissa cautions against the myth of “only one way” to achieve business success.

    • Quote (Melissa, 18:00):
      “There are many paths to success. There is not ever going to be one singular way to get it done.”

  • She distinguishes her own strengths—community connection, emotional intelligence—from influencer-style content creation, stating starkly:

    • Quote (Melissa, 19:34):
      “That’s not gonna be my ministry, and that’s okay.”

  • Janae agrees, emphasizing the necessity of aligning business activities with genuine enjoyment for sustainability.

    • Quote (Janae, 19:28):
      “It’s even harder when you don’t like it. I love it... So it’s not like I can’t wait to get in bed and, like, start editing.”

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4. Resilience, Teamwork, and Learning Through Failure

• Embracing Imperfection:

  • The panelists share stories of product launches gone awry and unexpected mishaps (like customs delays and bad photoshoots).
    • Quote (Janae, 20:47):
      “Nothing in this process has gone exactly the way I’ve wanted it to... We didn’t launch with products I wanted, the first shoot didn’t go well and we had to scrap it... this is new for you, but this is the way of business.”

• Constructive Failure:

  • Melissa reframes failure as the engine for growth:
    • Quote (Melissa, 21:56):
      “I love it when things break. It means my team is going to get better... Failing is so beautiful as long as you fail forward... If you’re continuously making the exact same mistakes, then, baby, you might be in the wrong business.”

• Team Reliance:

  • On delegating and relying on others:
    • Quote (Melissa, 21:56):
      “No one is in your brain but you... when you trust people, when you are hiring people, when you are giving entire functions—like, I don’t own a single function of The Lip Bar—that means things will go wrong. And that’s okay because you have to have room for people to learn.”

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5. Capitalism, Black Women, and Morality in Business

• The Perception of Wealth & Intent:

  • Discussion addresses the tension between Black success, community perception, and the morality of business profits.

    • Quote (Melissa, 29:08):
      “We can’t be afraid of money. Money is not a bad thing. We need money to eat, to feed our families, to fuel the future generation... I approach that with honesty. I approach it with integrity.”

  • On facing judging perceptions as their brands grow:

    • Quote (Melissa, 29:08):
      “You root for that person when they’re on the ground floor, and as soon as they are trying to grow, it’s kind of like you expect them to stay in that same place.”

• Mission, Not Manipulation:

  • Janae highlights the importance of community over profit and not playing on consumer insecurities:
    • Quote (Janae, 31:10):
      “Even when we do promotional assets or campaign shoots, I’m never trying to dig at the emotion of insecurity to get you to buy something... I want you to have a luxurious experience at an approachable price point.”

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6. Advice for Younger Selves

• Self-Trust and Grace:

  • Janae reflects:

    • Quote (Janae, 32:32):
      “Trust people to help you. Failure is okay. And don’t be so hard on yourself... my business is new for my brand, but I also have a creator business... Trying to do that and learn how to be the CEO... was very difficult. So just giving myself more grace.”

  • Memorable Moment:
    Melissa and Janae recall a collaborative product launch that was derailed when their items were held by customs for 6 weeks:

    • Quote (Melissa, 34:33):
      “Our items got held up in customs for six weeks for drugs. Why, I don’t know. Were we smuggling drugs? No... when I say Q4 almost took me out, I mean, it almost took me out.”

• Confidence—Even When Scared:

  • Melissa’s key lesson:
    • Quote (Melissa, 34:33):
      “If I would have had the confidence those early days to keep pushing ... I think we would have had a different path. Our path was still fine, but early on, it would have been a confidence conversation.”

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Melissa Butler:

  • “You have to have that same nerve to love yourself enough to show up for yourself.” (14:37)
  • “That’s not gonna be my ministry, and that’s okay.” (19:34)
  • “There are many paths to success.” (18:00)
  • “If you’re continuously making the exact same mistakes, then, baby, you might be in the wrong business.” (22:48)
  • “I love it when things break. It means my team is going to get better.” (21:56)
  • “Money is not a bad thing... We need money to eat, to feed our families, to fuel the future generation.” (29:08)
  • “Beauty is so male dominated... Even though they were not thinking about my customer when we started, it’s been really challenging to navigate, pushing on our suppliers, pushing on our retailers to remind them I actually know more about my customer than you.” (34:33)

• Janae:

  • “I feel like being aware of what you have to give people, and when you need to kind of rest... I’m not only giving to my audience, but also my team...” (06:02)
  • “Nothing in this process has gone exactly the way I’ve wanted it to... this is new for you, but this is the way of business.” (20:47)
  • “I want to make sure you feel seen with diversity in our campaigns... Money is kind of the byproduct of what I’m doing and that’s what comes in. But my goal is to make you feel good and make you feel seen.” (31:10)
  • “Trust people to help you. Failure is okay. And don’t be so hard on yourself.” (32:32)

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Important Timestamps

• Taking Care of Self & Boundaries in Entrepreneurship: 06:02 – 09:54
• Breaking Point & Permission to Rest: 13:52 – 15:47
• Being Visible & Navigating “On/Off” in Public: 16:00 – 17:23
• Paths to Business Success & Authenticity: 17:33 – 19:46
• Failure, Resilience, and Leadership: 20:47 – 22:48
• Money, Morality, and Community: 29:08 – 31:56
• Reflections & Advice to Younger Selves: 32:32 – 34:33

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Tone & Language

The episode is refreshingly honest, candid, and supportive, with an undercurrent of humor, camaraderie, and vulnerability. Both women are open about their struggles and triumphs, providing both valuable business insight and emotional resonance for Black women (and aspiring entrepreneurs of all backgrounds).

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Summary Takeaway:
The journey of Black women entrepreneurs is as much about self-permission, boundaries, and healing as it is about hustle and profit. Success isn’t about never failing—it’s about learning, growing, and leading with integrity, even when breaking points come. There’s no one path, and both panelists exemplify the power of creating your own, on your own terms.

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Transcript

[Host/Moderator]

This is an I heart podcast. Guaranteed human. Okay, so quick behind the scenes moment about my business because people always ask me how am I actually able to run everything? We got Brown Girl grinding on social media for the stories, but brown girlgrinding.com is Shopify in the merch. Shopify is literally the platform where I turn this tiny idea into a real business. And right now my storefront, browngargrande.com and the black Effects storefront are booked and busy and Shopify is handling all of the heavy lifting, y'. All. I'm so excited about the fact that Shopify is going to show up at the Black Effect Podcast Festival this year in a really big way. Go to shopify.com Ben if I can do it, trust me, y' all can do it too.

[Wheezy (Health Advocate)]

This is wheezy. WTF from Decisions decisions ladies. Let's talk about taking control of our sexual health. That's grown woman energy. You may think HIV affects someone else somewhere else, but the truth is it's impacting our community and some of us are being hit harder than others. Black women make up just 13% of the women in the US yet account for nearly half of new HIV diagnoses amongst women. Taking care of ourselves is community care. Know your options, ask questions and protect your peace and your body. That's using your power. Sponsored by Care for the Culture from Gilead Sciences.

[Host/Moderator]

Whether you're calling the wise woman in your life, video calling your girlfriends across the country, or checking in on someone who always knows how to make you smile, staying connected matters. Those small conversations, shared laughs and quick hellos are what keep relationships strong even when life gets busy. Some of the most life giving conversations start with just a phone call. That's why AT&T guarantees a network you can rely on so you can focus on the moments and people that matter the Most. That's the AT&T guarantee. AT&T connecting changes everything. Terms and conditions apply. Visit att.comguaranty for details.

[Wheezy (Health Advocate)]

Pressure has a way of revealing what remains steady. In the latest Nissan campaign, the Nissan Rogue was tested to the extreme to demonstrate that it's built to last through durability and reliability challenges inspired by real tests conducted by Nissan engineers.

[Host/Moderator]

Brutal potholes, a steady force of water,

[Wheezy (Health Advocate)]

even a jet powered sandstorm. Each challenge inviting a deeper look at how quality, durability and reliability hold their ground in real world conditions. Every test was 100% real. No CG, no AI.

[Host/Moderator]

To see how the Rogue held up,

[Wheezy (Health Advocate)]

visit nissan-duordability.com

[Host/Moderator]

I'm the homegirl that knows a little bit about everything and every body. No, she don't lie about that.

[Melissa Butler (Founder of Lip Bar)]

Right?

[Kal Penn (Shopify/Podcast Host)]

Lauren came in hot.

[Janae (Entrepreneur/Content Creator)]

Hey, y'. All.

[Host/Moderator]

What's up? It's Lauren LaRosa. And this is the latest with Lauren LaRosa. This is your daily dig on all things pop culture, entertainment news, and all of the conversations that shake the room, baby. So you guys know I've been in Miami for the Accelerate her awards, which is a global leadership conference with powerful women. These black women get together, and, I mean, these are millionaires, billionaires, women that are making decisions. These are the decision makers, the who's, who's. But more importantly, these women are women that are coming together because they want to pour into each other, they want to fill each other's cups, they want to celebrate each other, and they want to uplift the people that are coming next. And I am so blessed to have been in conversation as one of those people that are coming next and to receive the. And to receive the Bossy Award as a celebration in a notch in an official welcome, you know, into this leadership family. You know, it. This conference has been amazing. Shout out to Kimberly Blackwell, who has an agency that puts all these things together. I mean, sponsors range from everybody, you know, from Visa, and, you know, I got to do a fun activation with Meta Disney travel. I've. Wells Fargo. I've met so many people this past weekend. Ran into my girl Takara from America's Next Top Model as well. Yeah, just. I mean, Pastor Jamal o'. Brien. Kamala Harris spoke. I could go on for. I ran into Terry Vaughn. Had a great conversation with her as well. I could go on and on for days, and thanks for supporting me. A lot of what they talked about while I was here at this conference was the podcast in our audience, so I appreciate you guys always.

[Janae (Entrepreneur/Content Creator)]

Thank you, honey.

[Host/Moderator]

Welcome, ladies. The floor is yours. Hey, ladies.

[Melissa Butler (Founder of Lip Bar)]

Hi. Hello.

[Host/Moderator]

How y' all feeling?

[Janae (Entrepreneur/Content Creator)]

Amazing.

[Melissa Butler (Founder of Lip Bar)]

I'm excited to be here. I love this conference. It's just a warm hug.

[Host/Moderator]

It's my first year being here, and, I mean, last night I came in, I was really tired, but when I walked in, I received, like, it was. We were in church last night when I walked in, and then just now backstage, I told you guys that that was, like, the first, like, group conversation I've had, and that felt like a hug. So we were talking a bit, you know, backstage, and they were like, oh, what are we gonna talk about? And I was like, you know, I had prepared notes, and then as I was coming in here, I was like, there's so much I naturally wanna know from you women because you are so successful at what you do. But you also show up so much that I'm like, we're not gonna do the notes, we just gonna talk. We're gonna have sister conversation. Y' all down for that? All right, so my first question, and anybody can take this, is when you are working in an industry where you have to show up so much, like, I know you're in front of the camera a lot, you're modeling your own brand as well, you know, you face of your brand as well. But also I think when people here show up or be the face of, they only think about like an influencer or someone who's taking a photo for a website or, you know, doing interviews. But you show up every day sometimes even if you're behind the scenes, because your meetings, phone calls, zooms, you have employees. How do you take care of yourself in the midst of all of that? And I mean really take care of yourself. Not I get a 30 minute nap.

[Janae (Entrepreneur/Content Creator)]

We were kind of talking about it, but for me it's self awareness, knowing what you need. We talked about like when you don't answer the phone or when you. I'm a huge proponent of just like knowing what I need when I need it and being okay with that and not feeling like guilty about it. I don't. I have slow mornings. That, that's something I promise myself as an entrepreneur. When I work for myself, I'd rather stay up all night than get up early in the morning. So I'm going to have a slow morning. But I also don't talk on the phone all day and just like chit chat with people. I don't have it to give. I'll call you back. And that's just what. But also people know that like when I'm around other people, they're like, your phone never rings. Because I'm busy. This is the work day, I have to work. So I feel like being aware of what you have, have to give people. And when you need to kind of like rest, there's also like you said, you're on the go all the time and you get home, you just kind of like closed off to the world. That is very much me also. And that's okay. That's what I need to kind of like rejuvenate myself so that I'm not only giving to my audience, but also my team and making sure I can show up for them and be on 100%.

[Melissa Butler (Founder of Lip Bar)]

I love that that came Natural for you because you. You were what, a year in 10 months. 10 months.

[Janae (Entrepreneur/Content Creator)]

10 months.

[Melissa Butler (Founder of Lip Bar)]

Not for my brand.

[Janae (Entrepreneur/Content Creator)]

Yeah.

[Melissa Butler (Founder of Lip Bar)]

So I've been doing the lip Bar for 14 years, and I think I grew up in hustle culture, where it's like, you're supposed to give. You're supposed to grind all night, you're supposed to wake up early in the morning. And taking care of myself really took a backseat. It wasn't until Covid that I even gave myself permission to be Melissa. That's why if you notice if people. If you've come up to me, you're like, you're the lip bar girl. I'm like, I'm Melissa. Because I had to remind myself that I was a human first, not a business owner. And I think as a black woman, we grow up in this. In this world where we are used to wearing the weight, we're used to caring so much for our families, for our teams, for our communities, et cetera, that it was not natural to me. I actually had to go through a breaking point to say, melissa, you deserve more of you.

[Host/Moderator]

Yeah.

[Melissa Butler (Founder of Lip Bar)]

And in that breaking point, I just created serious boundaries. I'm like, oh, I don't work after 5 o' clock anymore. I don't work on the weekends. When I'm tired, I'm comfortable saying that I'm tired. When I don't want to show up, I say no. But that wasn't necessarily the case. And I don't think that that's how a lot of people grow their careers, grow their businesses, because we didn't know that we had permission to do that.

[Janae (Entrepreneur/Content Creator)]

It's a lot of unlearning.

[Host/Moderator]

Yeah.

[Janae (Entrepreneur/Content Creator)]

It's a lot of unearning from my previous career. The first year of, like, working on my own, I would have to tell myself, like, it's okay to take a break.

[Melissa Butler (Founder of Lip Bar)]

It's okay.

[Janae (Entrepreneur/Content Creator)]

It's okay to sit down. It's okay.

[Host/Moderator]

You feel like you need to feel

[Janae (Entrepreneur/Content Creator)]

every hour of the day because you're like, what will.

[Melissa Butler (Founder of Lip Bar)]

Productivity, Monster eating. Productivity. Like. Like Pac Man. And so I have leaned into wellness. I've leaned into fitness. I work out a ton. I realize that if I don't work out, I'm an angry person. I journal. I rely heavily on my journal because sometimes it's like you just have that emotion that you want to get out. It's not that you don't have anyone to talk to. I am so fortunate to have a great group of friends and family and even my team. I couldn't do this without my team. But sometimes you just want to be with you. You want to sit with your emotions first. And I have found that fitness, meditation, massages, Reiki, I've done all the things. But working out and journaling and also just sleeping has been a game changer. Like I try, I try really hard to prioritize. Seven, eight hours of sleep a night.

[Wheezy (Health Advocate)]

This is weezy. WTF from decisions, decisions. You know, a lot of us grew up not fully trusting the healthcare system. And honestly, the system has given us plenty of reasons to feel that way. But now it's time for us to take control of the conversation, to take control of our sexual health. Learn the facts, ask questions and advocate for ourselves. That's how we start changing the story. So let's talk. We like to think HIV is something that affects other people, but it is hitting our own community hard. Black women make up about 13% of women in the US but account for nearly half of all new HIV diagnosis around women. And being proactive doesn't mean you just don't trust your partner. It just means you trust yourself enough to stay in control. So know your options, ask questions and protect your peace and your body. That's real power. Because protecting yourself isn't embarrassing, it's responsible. Sex is normal. Protecting yourself should be normal too. Actually, it's kind of badass. Taking control of your sexual health is grown woman energy. Sponsored by Care for the Culture from Gilead Sciences.

[Dr. Jay Barnett (Just Heal with Dr. J Host)]

What's up everyone? This is Dr. Jay Barnett and I am the host of just heal with Dr. J. It's hard to believe that the first phone call ever happened over 150 years ago. Just think about that. I also want you to think about. What time is it? It's springtime. It's time to get outside and enjoy this beautiful weather. Hang out with some family and friends. Listen, I tell you who I'm going to connect with. I'm going to connect with myself because it's my birthday month. Yes, I am a spring baby. I'm going to take me some runs, I'm going to take me some long walks. I'm going probably go get some brunch too. You know, a little birthday brunch. And you know what? Over all of these years and phone calls at&t has been there connecting people in meaningful ways. This is more than just a story of technology and innovation. It's a story of human connection. And listen, with over 150 years of connecting, I just want to take this opportunity to remind you to call someone that you care about because that's what it's about.

[Melissa Butler (Founder of Lip Bar)]

Connecting Connecting changes everything.

[Janae (Entrepreneur/Content Creator)]

At and T I get a lot

[Kal Penn (Shopify/Podcast Host)]

of questions about how I run my business and keep everything operating smoothly and the answer is Shopify. Shopify is the commerce platform that lets me take my idea and turn it into a real, fully functioning business. One of the biggest advantages is discoverability. Shopify puts my products in front of customers wherever they're already shopping. Google, YouTube, TikTok, Shop, the Shop app, and even inside ChatGPT. And for my store, whether it's a mug, a shirt or a hoodie, all the raindrops can get something special to call their own. And Shopify's AI Co Founder Sidekick has become a core part of my workflow. It assists with tasks like website optimization, analyzing sale trends, updating product skus and generating reports. Right now the Black Effect storefront is busy and and Shopify is handling the heavy lifting. I'm so pumped because Shopify is going to show up at our Black Effect Podcast festival this year in a big way for all of our small black owned businesses that partner with us. Build your store, own your audience and create something that lasts. Start [e-mail] Ben if you're feeling off

[Inner Balance/Oestra Advertiser]

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[Host/Moderator]

point and I don't know if you had one that you want to share, but it made me think about I caretake for my mother and my grandmother. And I remember I got into a point where like I physically passed out because I was trying to keep up with work and that, you know, that space was new for me as well too. And I felt like if I didn't keep up for work I was out of sight, out of mind and because you know, at the time I was in the newsroom, I was the only black girl there and you know, I was like, if I dip, they're gonna just replace me, get rid of me. And I can't afford that, right? When you're in that breaking point, it feels like, oh my God, my world is over if I don't learn how to get back on the horse. What was Your self talk in that moment where you got yourself to a point where you're like, I don't wanna come back here again. Here are the things I need to do. And I'm okay with that.

[Melissa Butler (Founder of Lip Bar)]

It was really that I'm worthy. So, like, the way I think about the lip bar is like, I had the nerve to serve. I had the nerve to center black women. I had the nerve to say that our beauty was enough. Like, that took a lot of gumption, that took a lot of confidence, because it's not what the broader industry was doing 14 years ago. And so when I think about the how and why I started, it's like, well, Melissa, you have to have that same nerve to love yourself enough to show up for yourself. Not just your customers, not just your community, not just your team members. And I think that's a hard thing to do. But it was just a moment of defiance. It was a moment of defying what the world said success looked like. And I think that, you know, now, 20, 26, 14 years later, I love that wellness is being prioritized because that certainly wasn't the case. And so it's just a matter of, like, deciding that you are good enough for the fruits of your labor, frankly. Because, like, we all work so incredibly hard. Why, why wouldn't I take the vacation? Why wouldn't I do the thing? Why wouldn't I sit back and look at the world that I've built?

[Janae (Entrepreneur/Content Creator)]

And the vision and passion that you have for your brand, no one can replace that. Like you're saying you do feel like you have to be visible or you're gonna get passed by and people are gonna forget about you. But no one's serving the community I'm serving in the way that I'm serving them. So they will be there.

[Host/Moderator]

Let's stay there for a second too. Because one thing I noticed about your brand. So not even just 12pm Studios, but like, you know, you're vlogging on YouTube. You are very present across social media as well too.

[Melissa Butler (Founder of Lip Bar)]

Everything, right?

[Host/Moderator]

No one can do that like you. Because when we are fans of you, it's physically like you, right? That means you have to pick and choose when you allow that to be shut off. And realizing that you just walking outside of your house could turn into a photo op moment. Or like, where's your on and off switch? On the influencer side of it, right? Because if I'm a fan on YouTube and you're out and about and you're not vlogging, but I see you, it's like, I want that interaction. I want that. But that may be your off day. So how do you figure that out in the space of 2026? We take out our phone. We live.

[Janae (Entrepreneur/Content Creator)]

You know, it's so funny because I also am very aware of my community. Like, this is my community, right? It's black women. So I know when I need to be on, and that's just a part of my job and responsibility, and I'm happy to do it. But I know I'm like, hey, if I'm going to Tyson's Corner, that's like the luxury mall. I'm gonna see the queens. I'm gonna see my audience like that. So that's what it is. So I need to be prepared. I need to make sure I look ready for photos or I'm just in a headspace, and if I don't got it that day, then I need to stay home because. Or I need to go. There's parts of town where I'm like, my audience is not gonna be here. I might go to a barbecue, place this in the little hole in the wall. I'm like, this is.

[Host/Moderator]

I'm good here.

[Janae (Entrepreneur/Content Creator)]

No one's gonna ask for a picture. Like, these people don't know who I am. So that's just, like, a part of life. But I make sure I can show up and go places when I know my people are gonna be there.

[Melissa Butler (Founder of Lip Bar)]

You know what's interesting about that? Like, I have been so antisocial from the beginning of time. Like, I know that the lip bar would be so much bigger if I were to truly step into being the face of the brand. Like, I'm the face of the brand

[Host/Moderator]

because you leaned in. I know you got that advice on Shark Tank.

[Melissa Butler (Founder of Lip Bar)]

People remember me from Shark Tank, but I'm not the person, like, camera to the face all day. I'm not the person who's creating content. It is not natural to me. And I have struggled with that over the years, mostly because that is where a lot of the growth is coming from. It's like, oh, you're supposed to create the content. You have to invite people into your world. And I have been so intentional about deciding to keep my world private. People don't know that much about me. People know, like, Melissa was on Shark Tank. People know what I allow them to know, right? And, like, yes, I'll be vocal about things that I think that my broader community needs to know, but people don't even know I'm in Miami right now. But I think that one of the Things I want us to get out of the habit of is thinking that there's only one path to success. There are many paths to success. There is not ever going to be one singular way to get it done. Like, math is incredibly complex, and I think that you have to be comfortable with leaning into the thing that you are good at. I am good at understanding the community. I am good at connecting dots. I am good at understanding emotion and understanding the gaps in which our community are not being served. That's my superpower, being a content creator. And editing is probably not it. I also know that it's not it, because that is hard as hell.

[Host/Moderator]

Yes.

[Melissa Butler (Founder of Lip Bar)]

Like, you have ever tried to, like, create content. I'm like, oh, I have so much respect for Janae because. Wow.

[Janae (Entrepreneur/Content Creator)]

And it's even harder when you don't like it. Yeah. Like, I love it. So it's not like I'm like, I can't wait to get in bed and, like, start editing.

[Melissa Butler (Founder of Lip Bar)]

Meanwhile, it's that hard thing. And I'm like, I'm kind of unwilling to do it. Like, I will give myself in many other ways, but that's not gonna be my ministry, and that's okay.

[Host/Moderator]

And, you know, one of the things talking about creating content in Janae, like, even before meeting you here, you're one of the people that, like, you're consistent. I know, like, when she coming, she is coming. And, I mean, the details are together, the look is together. It's like. And it doesn't feel like the aesthetic is forced. And I love people who make content that way. Right. I was on your website. I was telling you this. I was on 12pm Studio's website preparing for this conversation. And the first thing I thought, I'm like. I'm like, I don't know if people understand the importance of a product shot when you were an entrepreneur trying to sell a product, but I was like, wow, her photos are amazing, but they're so simple. But the details are there. And both of you ladies, I know, because I know you were making things out of your kitchen forever, right? Because the details are so important to you guys. I want to hear about a time, though, because you do detail so well that the details weren't done right. And how did you deal with that internally? Because if you take it so serious, I know it hurts when it don't go well.

[Janae (Entrepreneur/Content Creator)]

This is something I'm still learning because I feel like nothing in this process has gone exactly the way I've wanted it to. And it's, I think, just learning as an entrepreneur. Like, obviously you don't know as a consumer what my goal is and what my hope is or my vision is. But from launch day, we didn't launch with the products I wanted to, like, there were certain things that weren't ready and we couldn't push it back anymore. The first shoot didn't go well and we had to scrap it and hire a whole new team and do a whole different shoot. Obviously no one knows that, but that was devastating to me when we spent most of our budget on that shoot and then had to like, basically asked for favors and my husband had to hop in and do stuff. So there's so many things. And I kind of was holding myself very accountable and like, being very difficult on myself. And I had to say, like, this is new, this is new for you, but also this is the way of business. Like, things are not always going to pan out how you expected and how you hoped for it, but you need to just keep it moving and elevate. Right. Like the website you're looking at, that was not the website we launched with, but we also needed to launch with what we were capable of and what we had the capacity to do. So I'm still in the learning phase of that.

[Melissa Butler (Founder of Lip Bar)]

I think one of the most important characteristics of a leader of an entrepreneur is resilience. And with that resilience, there's an understanding that things will go wrong. Like, I expect things to go wrong. I don't freak out when they go wrong. I'm like, oh, okay, I'm still in the freak out that went wrong. I've accepted it. Now what is the solution? I get very action oriented also. I think one of the things is just like reliance. So there's resilience and there's the reliance, the reliance on your team. And like, no one is in your brain but you. No one has your exact vision but you. And so when you trust people, when you are hiring people, when you are giving entire functions, like I don't own a single function of the lip bar, that means that things will go wrong. And that's okay because you have to have room for people to learn. It also allows you to grow as a leader. So when things go wrong, it literally doesn't bother me. I love it when things break. I love it because it means that my team is going to get better. It means that I learn how to communicate my vision, my goals a little bit sharper so that the next time we can fail at a different time. I think that failing is so beautiful as long as you fail. Forward now. If you're continuously making the exact same mistakes, then, baby, you might be in the wrong business. But the goal is to get better. I mean, that is the name and game of capitalism. There's always more. And I think that that has been the most painful part of being an entrepreneur because you don't realize that when you're starting this business with the goal to serve or to show up for a specific community in a way that they are not currently being served. Like, you start in a very purpose driven way and then you start growing and then you're like, whoa, I hit that milestone. What's the next one? And every single year there is a new milestone, which means that every single year you have to work slightly differently to reach that new goal. So you got to get comfortable with shit right now.

[Wheezy (Health Advocate)]

This is wheezy. WTF from Decisions, decisions. You know, a lot of us grew up not fully trusting the health care system. And honestly, the system has given us plenty of reasons to feel that way. But now it's time for us to take control of the conversation, to take control of our sexual health, Learn the facts, ask questions, and advocate for ourselves. That's how we start changing the story. So let's talk. We like to think HIV is something that affects other people, but it is hitting our own community hard. Black women make up about 13% of women in the US but account for nearly half of all new HIV diagnosis around women. And being proactive doesn't mean you just don't trust your partner. It just means you trust yourself enough to stay in control. So know your options, ask questions, and protect your peace and your body. That's real power. Because protecting yourself isn't embarrassing, it's responsible. Sex is normal. Protecting yourself should be normal too. Actually, it's kind of badass. Taking control of your sexual health is grown woman energy sponsored by Care for the Culture from Gilead Sciences.

[Kal Penn (Shopify Spokesperson)]

A lot of you ask how I actually run my business behind the scenes. And honestly, Shopify is the reason it exists. For me, Shopify is the place where I took this little idea I had and turned it into a real business. It's the platform where I own everything. My store, my customers, my community. When I started my storefront, Shopify made it just so easy. With just a few clicks, I was ready to share my vision with the world. And the best part, Shopify literally gets my products everywhere People Shop. Google, YouTube, TikTok, the Shop app, even ChatGPT. I still remember the first ever sale I made for my fashion brand, Embellished that that little notification cha ching, cha ching cha ching is music to my ears and Shopify made it all possible. I'm so pumped that Shopify is going to show up at our Black Effect Podcast Festival this year in a big way for all of our small black owned businesses that partner with us. Plus Shop pay. The purple button is a game changer fast one click checkout. If I don't see it when I'm shopping, I'm stressed. So I love knowing my customers get that same trusted experience. Build your store, own your audience and create something that lasts. Start [e-mail] Ben hey everyone, it's Kal Penn.

[Kal Penn (Shopify/Podcast Host)]

I'm the host of Irsay The Audible

[Host/Moderator]

and iHeart Audiobook Club.

[Kal Penn (Shopify/Podcast Host)]

This week on the podcast I am sitting down with Ray Porter, the narrator of Andy Weir's audiobook project Hail Mary Massive Sci fi adventure about survival and science and what happens when you wake up alone, very far from Earth.

[Dr. Jay Barnett (Just Heal with Dr. J Host)]

I really had to make a decision because I caught myself getting that frog in my throat and starting to get teary as I'm narrating some of these sections and it's like, okay, yo yo yo, is this indulgent? And I really thought about it. I was like, no. At this point it would kind of be betraying the trust the author and the listener have in telling this story if I don't go through it. But there's places in this book that that deeply, emotionally affected me and I left it on the mic. That's great because it served the story. People will say like oh my God, I cried at the end. It's like yeah dude, me too.

[Kal Penn (Shopify/Podcast Host)]

Listen to Irsay the Audible and iHeart audiobook club on the iHeartradio app or

[Host/Moderator]

wherever you get your podcasts dealing with

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[Host/Moderator]

That's innerbalance.com when you talk about starting out with this purpose and you want to help everybody. And I just think about someone who's really, really young in business. Not even the age, but just first six months out of their first business. It's such a green eye. I can solve every Problem. I can do all these things. And then you get to the point where you're making money and you bring in the capitalism conversation. I think that that's a capitalist conversation. And I think for black people and for black women, that conversation has always been one that like, some people are willing to have and some people aren't because there's a whole conversation about it gets to a point where some industries are like, they lean in on what people are weak with, right? So like, you guys are in beauty, fashion. They appeal to what. They appeal to people's weaknesses to make them wanna buy. Right? But you guys remain good people throughout it. And I think a lot of people are scared that once you start making that money and you are, are okay with making your money, you're a black woman out here doing it. That now people change how they think about you as a person, morally. How do you guys deal with that as successful black women? Go ahead.

[Melissa Butler (Founder of Lip Bar)]

Well, I mean, I think the first thing is that we can't be afraid of money. Money is not a bad thing. We need money to eat, to feed our families, to fuel the future generation. And I do think that we have condemned making money in some facet. It's like, you know, you root for that person when they're on the ground floor, and as soon as they are trying to grow, which requires a different version of them, it's kind of like you expect them to stay in that same place. And I approach that with honesty. I approach it with integrity. I am a very transparent person. I've made it my personality to be honest because, like, I never want people to assume things about me. Ask and I will give you the real answer. And I have, I've used that with my family, with my friends, with my, my customers and my community. And so it's like, yeah, one day I do want to sell the lip bar. And I actually think it's a great thing. I understand that some people may think it's bad, bad, you know, so it's like, it's just about approaching things with honesty integr and integrity. But also it's understanding that our broader community may not know the why. And so I take a very serious responsibility in helping to educate them. Like, why, why, why are these beauty brands selling? Why are these beauty brands failing? Like what, what does it require to raise capital? Like, we don't really know the ins and outs business beyond rooms like this. Right? So we are in a very privileged room right now. But the masses for black people in this country have no idea how Any of this works. And so it's a lot of assumptions that go into it. And I think that we as leaders in this space, we have to approach it with honesty and integrity and with a heart in educating our people if we want to see more from our community.

[Host/Moderator]

Communities.

[Janae (Entrepreneur/Content Creator)]

And if you want them to stay on your side like you said, I feel like it's also a balance of. I think we both have this in common with our brands where we are serving it's community first is the goal. So even when we do promotional assets or campaign shoots, I'm never trying to dig at the emotion of insecurity to get you to buy something. Right. It's about building a community and you being a part of something. I want to make sure you feel seen with diversity in our campaigns. So it's always community driven and I'm here to serve you. I want you to feel have a luxurious experience at an approachable price point. So I'm offering more than I feel like I'm trying to get. So I feel like there's a good balance with like the. Yes, money is kind of the byproduct of what I'm doing and that's what comes in. But my goal is to make you feel good and make you feel seen.

[Host/Moderator]

Got you. I love those answers. I do. And I was excited to come to this space to feel that as well. Cause we do. Like you get to a certain point and you see it, you see, have conversations about women who have acquired a certain amount of success financially or whatever, as if this isn't the same person who may come from whatever she came from or whatever the case may be. And it's very unfortunate. And if you guys could talk to yourselves way back when, your first day of business, what would you tell her as the woman you are sitting here as today,

[Janae (Entrepreneur/Content Creator)]

Trust people to help you. Failure is okay. And don't be so hard on yourself. I was talking to you earlier the last fourth quarter. I feel like almost broke me because it's also a balance of my business is new for my brand, but I also have a creator business and that business has been thriving since 2019 when I became a creator full time. So I'm also on the journey of learning to balance two businesses and clocking in, clocking out of this job and into this job and I do both all day long. And trying to do that and learn how to be the CEO of this new brand was very difficult. So just giving myself more grace.

[Host/Moderator]

Do it, girl. Give yourself some grace. You're doing it in Front of the

[Janae (Entrepreneur/Content Creator)]

world, too, in that part.

[Host/Moderator]

I need to tell myself that that's why I said it to you.

[Melissa Butler (Founder of Lip Bar)]

You said fourth quarter almost broke you. I'm going to tell y' all a really quick story. That's not so. Janae and I did a collab last holiday. It was November, it launched, it was beautiful. It was fabulous. She was fabulous. All the things. Our items got held up in customs for six weeks for drugs. Why? I don't know. Were we smuggling drugs? No. Why they decided to search them and hold our items for six weeks for drugs, I don't know. Still don't know. But when I tell you that was a time that I was panicking because we had to be very vulnerable and open. And I don't know if you were getting crazy messages, like, my order is taking too long, and we had to just address people. And, you know, sometimes people don't necessarily want to read or, you know, but we are sending, I don't know, maybe five different emails on sort of like, what's happening. And when I say Q4 almost took me out, I mean, it almost took me out. I don't even remember the question. But when you said that, I had a flashback to what was happening, my Q4, and I was like, oh, yeah, last, you know, four months ago. It was.

[Host/Moderator]

It was a.

[Melissa Butler (Founder of Lip Bar)]

It was a storm. But I would tell myself to just be confident, to be confident and in who I am and the mistakes that I would make in my ability to do exactly what I set out to do. Beauty is so male dominated. It is dominated by white French men. So, period. And so going into it, even though they were not thinking about my customer when we started, you know, it's been really challenging to navigate, you know, pushing on our suppliers, pushing on our retailers to remind them that, like, I actually know more about my customer than you. And sometimes it gets really easy to listen to the powers that be, those manufacturers, those suppliers, those retailers. And so in those early days, I wish I would have reminded myself that, like, I am starting because there. There is a gap that they don't see and to just do it scared. And so I was so scared in those early days because I didn't know anything. I was on Wall Street. I went from Wall street to beauty. I knew nothing about it. And so if I would have had the confidence those early days to keep pushing on some of those more challenging conversations, I think we would have had a different path. And our path was still fine, it was still ours, and I'm still very proud of it. But early on, it would have been a confidence conversation.

[Host/Moderator]

Isn't it crazy when you look back at those times though, you talk about confidence and not being hard on yourself and once you make it out of it, it's like you had no idea what was on the other side. But God, I'm so grateful I made it to the other side. Right? I think that's a great note to end the conversation on, ladies, you guys have been amazing and I hope you know, for everyone who's been out here listening to this conversation, you realize, number one, that nobody has it all figured out. Because these ladies right here, if you follow them anywhere on Social, you buy any of their product, I swear by Lip Bar, I love your content. It feels like they have it all figured out. But you hear them say they're figuring things out as well. They're figuring out, they're fixing, they're maneuvering, but they're doing it. They're doing it scared. They're doing it in front of the world. So we commend you ladies. Congratulations on everything. And yeah, girl, you got it, y'. All. The birthday.

[Janae (Entrepreneur/Content Creator)]

Okay, thank you.

[Wheezy (Health Advocate)]

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[Dr. Jay Barnett (Just Heal with Dr. J Host)]

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[Host/Moderator]

This is Sophia Donner from OK Storytime this summer. Find your next obsession on Prime Video and listen. We're not saying you need another obsession, but there could be a lot worse ones. Steamy romance, addictive love stories, and the book to screen favorites you've already read twice, so why not watch them a third time? Off campus? Elle, the Love Hypothesis and more Slow Burns Second Chances chemistry you can feel through the screen and it makes you wish you were actually in that movie. We've got binge worthy series can't miss movies perfect for when you're ignoring your own problems or procrastinating as one does. Your next obsession is waiting.

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[Janae (Entrepreneur/Content Creator)]

Com.

[Host/Moderator]

This is an iHeart podcast. Guaranteed human.