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Kevin Smith
Hey kids, it's me, Kevin Smith.
Harley Quinn Smith
And it's me, Harley Quinn Smith.
Kevin Smith
That's my daughter, man, who my wife has always said is just a beardless dless version of me. And that's the name of our podcast. Beardless D Me. I'm the old one, I'm the young one, and every week we try to make each other laugh really hard. Sounds innocent, doesn't it? A lot of cussing, a lot of bad language. It's for adults only. Or listen to it with your kid. Could be a family show. We're not quite sure. We're still figuring it out.
Harley Quinn Smith
It's a work in progress.
Kevin Smith
Listen to Beardless me on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Unknown Host
Do you remember what you said the first night I came over here?
John Cameron Mitchell
Ow.
Unknown Host
Go slower. From Blumhouse TV, I Heart podcasts and Ember 20 comes an all new fictional comedy podcast series. Join the flighty Damien Hirst as he unravels the mystery of his vanished boyfriend. I've been spending all my time looking for answers about what happened to Santi and what's the way to find a missing person. Sleep with everyone he knew? Obviously. Listen to the hookup on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
John Cameron Mitchell
This is John Cameron Mitchell and my new fiction podcast series, Cancellation island stars Holly Hunter as Karen, a wellness influencer who launches a rehab for the recently canceled in the future, we will all be canceled for 15 minutes, but don't worry, we'll take you from broke to woke or your money back. Cancellation Island's revolutionary rehab therapies like Bad touch football, anti racism spin class and mandatory Ayahuasca ceremonies are designed to force the council to confront their worst impulses. But everything starts to fall apart when people start disappearing.
Kevin Smith
Karen, where have you brought us?
John Cameron Mitchell
Cancellation island, where a second chance might just be your last. Listen to Cancellation island on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.
Harley Quinn Smith
I ain't trying to be dunkey today no more. They should be embarrassed by what they already did. I'm not making these people do these things called donkey of the day and it really caught me off guard. Damn Charlemagne. Who got the donkey of the day today? Well, Jeff's hilarious. The donkey of the day for Monday, March 31st goes to two 17 year olds named Fernando Amaya and Christopher Portillo Luna. Okay? Both of these young men are from Texas. Houston, I believe. And I want every single teenager, every single young person listening to me right now to learn from these two individuals mistakes. See, Fernando and Christopher are friends. And I put friends in air quotes because friends don't let friends crash out. Okay, we don't put enough emphasis on that. We all remember the friends don't let friends drive drunk campaign, right? All that is essentially saying is friends don't let friends make poor decisions. Friends don't let friends make poor choices. I, I don't want friends that's down to ride for whatever, okay? I want friends that love me enough to say, no, I'm not doing that with you because it's stupid and it's either going to get us killed or locked up. And that's exactly what needed to happen in this situation. See, Fernando was 17 and he was dating a young girl. The news report says a minor, so he's 17. So who knows how old the young girl was? 15, 16. But that was boo. That was his cinnamon apple. And he found out that she was cheating on him. So he went and got his friend Christopher and well, if you want to know what happened next, let's go to ABC13 Eyewitness News for the report please.
ABC13 News Reporter
Christopher Portillo Luna smiled for the camera and refused to sign his bond. Conditions the 17 year old joining Fernando Amaya behind bars. Both accused in the murder of Marcos Cato Torres. Torres who was shot to death last week. The target court record state in a love triangle involving Amaya and his teenaged girlfriend. Gunfire erupted at the complex on cook Road on March 18. It was 1am Torres was found dead outside his apartment where today chunks of the wall are missing. According to court records, Amaya and luna used an AK style rifle firing 84 rounds at apartment 227, also injuring his roommate inside. Prosecutors revealing a motive. Amaia, it reads quote, threatened to kill himself and his juvenile girlfriend for cheating on him with a male who he later murdered. ABC13 reached the victim's sister who was unaware of any relationship. She said her 41 year old brother is innocent and did not have a social life.
Harley Quinn Smith
Now 17 year old young man shoots up an apartment because his girlfriend was cheating on him. Ain't no love triangle amongst teenagers, okay? Y'all don't even know what love is. And I'm looking at this other article from law and crime and it says that he actually killed the wrong man, right? So it's so many teachable moments in this situation. I'm just gonna say some things I thought about when I first heard this story. Number one, why in the hell does a 17 year old have access to an AK style rifle? Investigators found 84 spent shell casings. Why? Where did he get this kind of weapon? Okay, I'm all for young people learning how to properly use a firearm, but Jesus Christ, at 17 if you want to use those kinds of weapons, then you need to be joining the Armed Forces. Second 17 year old crashing out over your little girlfriend. You know what my dad told me when I was that age and I wanted to crash out over my little girlfriend, My dad said, and I quote, you got your nose open over that girl and she out here sleeping with you and probably every man in Mount's corner. That's my hometown by the way. Now he was exaggerating of course, but what he was simply telling me was that little girlfriend, not yours. You 17. You know how many more women you gonna meet in your life, Fernando? Do you know how many other women would have been out there for you to meet? But thank God these women won't ever get to meet you because you needed help long before this situation. Now I don't know, Fernando, he's only 17, so it's not a long resume there. But there has to be some type of behavioral pattern that we can look to that show us why he thought it was okay to pull up with an AK style rifle and let off damn near 100 rounds into an apartment. Because he wanted to kill whoever his young girlfriend was cheating with. Allegedly. Now the last thing that came to mind was Christopher, his friend. My brothers, you have to tell your stupid ass crash out friend, no, let that man go. Throw his life away by his damn self. In fact, I'll go a step further and I want every young person to feel me when I say this. When you know your so called friend is about to go do something that is going to, you know, be stupid. You have to tell on them. I'm serious. You absolutely, positively have to go tell an adult. All right, Fernando. Christopher. You know, when. When, When, Christopher. Well, oh, yeah, Christopher. When Fernando came to you and said he wants to go kill the man, you know, his girlfriend cheating with. You know, Fernando told his girlfriend that he was gonna shoot up the apartment and then kill himself. So if he told his girlfriend that, then I know he told you. You're supposed to tell your friend, no, that's stupid. You going to go to prison for the rest of your life. And you shouldn't be threatening. No murder suicide at 17 years old. There's so much life to live. Too many other fish in the sea to be caught. To be crashing out like this at 17. And guess what, Christopher, if you think it's too much for you to deal with, then tell an adult. Kids, you don't have to bear any of this responsibility from your dumbass friends who want to make dumbass decisions. Tell an adult. I'm 46 years old. I made all those same dumb decisions when I was 17 and I was around people making dumb decisions. But this is what I wish, you know, I had when I was that age. I wish we had friends who would tell us no and friends who didn't care what we would think, okay? They would tell adults on our dumb ass. That's what I wish would happen in this situation. You know how much I wouldn't have gotten into if I had friends around me willing to tell me no? That's dumb. I'm not rolling with that. And if I was hell bent on doing some dirt myself, they would tell an adult on me. I wish. Okay, I think about the movie Juice often, and I understand it's a movie, but if it was real life, somebody in the crew should have said, no, I'm not going to rob old man Quillis. That's dumb. That was Q. But Q buckled to the peer pressure. If Q hadn't buckled the peer pressure, I don't think still would have rolled either. But they did, and Bishop ended up killing old man Quillis and then ended up killing Raheem. At that moment, Q and still was supposed to start telling every adult they knew. Call the proper authorities. Okay?
Kevin Smith
Friends.
Harley Quinn Smith
Friends don't let friends crash out. Now Fernando and Christopher are both behind bars with bonds over $1 million. Okay? And guess what, Fernando, your boo, that little girl who you just crashed out over, she gonna be out here still living her life, dating who she wants to date, and you gonna be spending the rest of your life in prison. Dating whoever other inmates tell you to date. The moral of the story is friends, okay? Real friends will discourage each other from engaging in reckless or foolish behavior or from making poor decisions that could lead to negative consequences. Or to put it simply, once again, friends don't let friends crash out. Please give Fernando Amaya and Christopher Portillo the biggest Hee Haw. That's horrible.
Nissan Commercial Voice
Yes, it is.
Harley Quinn Smith
That's horrible, man.
Nissan Commercial Voice
All right, well, thank you for that. Donkey of the Day.
Harley Quinn Smith
Yes, indeed. Donkey of the Day is sponsored by renowned personal injury attorney Michael the Bull Lamentsoft. Don't be a donkey when you need a fighter on your side. If you're ever injured, go to michaelthebull.com that's michaelthebull.com and when you mess with the bull, you get the horns. Wake that ass up early in the morning.
Kevin Smith
The Breakfast Club. Hey, kids, it's me, Kevin Smith.
Harley Quinn Smith
And it's me, Harley Quinn Smith.
Kevin Smith
That's my daughter, man. Who my wife has always said is just a beardless d? Ckless version of me. And that's the name of our podcast. Beardless Me. I'm the old one, I'm the young one. And every week we try to make each other laugh really hard. Sounds innocent, doesn't it? Lot of cussing, a lot of bad language. It's for adults only. Or listen to it with your kid. Could be a family show. We're not quite sure. We're still figuring it out.
Harley Quinn Smith
It's a work in progress.
Kevin Smith
Listen to Beardless me on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Unknown Host
Do you remember what you said the first night I came over here?
John Cameron Mitchell
Ow.
Unknown Host
Go slower. From Blumhouse TV, iHeart podcasts and Ember 20 comes an all new fictional comedy podcast series. Join the flighty Damien Hirst as he unravels the mystery of his vanished boyfriend. I've been spending all my time looking for answers about what happened to Santi and what's the way to find a missing person. Sleep with everyone he knew, Obviously. Listen to the hookup on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
John Cameron Mitchell
This is John Cameron Mitchell and my new fiction podcast series, Cancellation island stars Holly Hunter as Karen, a wellness influencer who launches a rehab for the recently canceled. In the future, we will all be canceled for 15 minutes. But don't worry, we'll take you from broke to woke or your money back. Cancellation Island's revolutionary rehab therapies like bad touch football, anti racism, spin class, and mandatory Ayahuasca ceremonies are designed to force the council to confront their worst impulses. But everything starts to fall apart when people start disappearing.
Kevin Smith
Karen, where have you brought us?
John Cameron Mitchell
Cancellation island, where a second chance might just be your last. Listen to Cancellation island on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Unknown Host
You feeling this, too is a horror anthology podcast. It brings different creators to tell ten vile.
Harley Quinn Smith
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Unknown Host
Grotesque.
Kevin Smith
Oh, my God.
Unknown Host
Horrific stories on what scares them the most. You feeling this, too? Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
The Breakfast Club: Episode Summary
Title: DONKEY: 2 Teens Charged In Deadly Shooting Over Love Triangle
Host/Author: iHeartPodcasts
Release Date: March 31, 2025
In this gripping episode of The Breakfast Club, the hosts delve into a tragic incident that has shaken the Houston community. The episode titled "DONKEY: 2 Teens Charged In Deadly Shooting Over Love Triangle" explores the harrowing case of two 17-year-olds, Fernando Amaya and Christopher Portillo Luna, who are charged with the murder of Marcos Cato Torres. The discussion provides a comprehensive overview of the事件, shedding light on the motivations, legal proceedings, and broader social implications.
The episode begins with host Harley Quinn Smith introducing the case:
"The donkey of the day for Monday, March 31st goes to two 17 year olds named Fernando Amaya and Christopher Portillo Luna. Both of these young men are from Texas. Houston, I believe."
(02:35)
Fernando Amaya, at 17, was involved in a tumultuous relationship with a minor girlfriend. Upon discovering that she was cheating on him, Fernando enlisted his friend, Christopher Portillo Luna, to confront the situation, which tragically escalated into violence.
Harley provides a detailed account of the事件:
"Fernando was 17 and he was dating a young girl... he found out that she was cheating on him. So he went and got his friend Christopher and... [s]hooting erupted at the complex on Cook Road on March 18. It was 1am Torres was found dead outside his apartment where today chunks of the wall are missing."
(04:05)
The shooting was both brutal and excessive, with Fernando and Christopher firing approximately 84 rounds from an AK-style rifle at apartment 227. The attack not only resulted in the death of Marcos Cato Torres but also injured Torres's roommate.
Delving deeper into the motive, Harley relays information from court records:
"Prosecutors revealing a motive. Amaya, it reads quote, 'threatened to kill himself and his juvenile girlfriend for cheating on him with a male who he later murdered.'"
(04:10)
The court has portrayed the事件 as a love triangle gone violently wrong, with Fernando's jealousy driving him to commit murder. Notably, Torres's sister maintains her brother's innocence, stating:
"She said her 41-year-old brother is innocent and did not have a social life."
(04:15)
Both teenagers are now behind bars with bonds set over $1 million, awaiting further legal proceedings.
Harley Quinn Smith offers a poignant analysis of the事件, emphasizing the role of peer influence and the importance of responsible decision-making among teenagers:
"Why in the hell does a 17 year old have access to an AK style rifle? Investigators found 84 spent shell casings. Why? Where did he get this kind of weapon?"
(05:19)
She underscores the critical need for friends to support each other in making sound choices:
"Friends don't let friends crash out. Real friends will discourage each other from engaging in reckless or foolish behavior or from making poor decisions that could lead to negative consequences."
(09:13)
Harley's heartfelt plea serves as a societal call to action:
"Kids, you don't have to bear any of this responsibility from your dumbass friends who want to make dumbass decisions. Tell an adult."
(08:30)
The episode doesn't stop at the individual case but broadens the discussion to societal issues such as access to firearms among minors and the pervasive impact of peer pressure. Harley draws parallels with cultural references to illustrate the dangers of succumbing to negative influences:
"I think about the movie Juice often... someone in the crew should have said, 'No, I'm not going to rob old man Quillis.' That's dumb. That was Q. But Q buckled to the peer pressure."
(08:45)
In wrapping up, Harley reiterates the critical lesson from this tragedic事件:
"The moral of the story is friends, okay? Real friends will discourage each other from engaging in reckless or foolish behavior... Friends don't let friends crash out."
(09:13)
She poignantly notes the irreversible consequences of the teenagers' actions, emphasizing the loss not only of life but also of future potential:
"Fernando, your boo... she gonna be out here still living her life... and you gonna be spending the rest of your life in prison."
(09:30)
"Fernando... you know how many more women you gonna meet in your life... but thank God these women won't ever get to meet you because you needed help long before this situation."
(05:25) – Harley Quinn Smith
"Real friends will discourage each other from engaging in reckless or foolish behavior or from making poor decisions that could lead to negative consequences."
(09:13) – Harley Quinn Smith
"You absolutely, positively have to go tell an adult."
(07:45) – Harley Quinn Smith
This episode serves as a sobering exploration of the tragic consequences that can arise from poor decision-making and the absence of supportive friendships. It calls on listeners to reflect on their own relationships and the impact they have on each other's lives.