Pretty Private: Down Low Men Exposed: Part 1 with the DL Whisperer

Summary

Podcast Summary: The Breakfast Club – "Pretty Private: Down Low Men Exposed: Part 1 with the DL Whisperer"

Episode Information:

• Title: Pretty Private: Down Low Men Exposed: Part 1 with the DL Whisperer
• Host/Author: iHeartPodcasts
• Release Date: August 2, 2025
• Description: In this intense and revealing episode of The Breakfast Club, hosted by DJ Envy, Jess Hilarious, and Charlamagne Tha God, the team welcomes DL Whisperer—a specialist shedding light on the elusive world of Down Low (DL) men. This first part delves deep into the personal journey of DL Whisperer, exploring the complexities of DL culture, its impact on relationships, and the broader implications within the Black community.

---

1. Introduction to DL Whisperer and the Concept of Down Low Men

Ebony opens the conversation by welcoming DL Whisperer, highlighting his pivotal role in addressing conversations that many avoid. She emphasizes the importance of his work in informing and empowering listeners about DL men.

Key Quote:

"Welcome to Pretty Private with Ebony, a space where no question is off limits and storylines become lifelines."
[00:04]

Defining Down Low: DL Whisperer clarifies what it means to be a Down Low (DL) man:

"A Download man is a man that either has been with men, has desires to be with men... Essentially, dating women, marrying women, but sleeping with men secretly."
[02:32]

2. DL Whisperer’s Personal Journey with DL Men

DL Whisperer shares his personal experiences with DL men, explaining how his relationships evolved and the challenges he faced.

Key Quote:

"After five years, I was like, are we getting married?"
[05:23]

He recounts a particularly tumultuous relationship that escalated to violence:

"Like, he tried to kill me. He ended up going to jail. I ended up exposing him against the police wishes."
[06:55]

3. Impact on Women and the Black Community

The discussion shifts to how DL men affect women and the broader Black community. DL Whisperer highlights the betrayal and emotional turmoil women endure when their partners are DL men.

Key Quote:

"Some women will do a lot to keep DL men, like maybe their kids and stuff."
[28:39]

He emphasizes the role of Black women in strengthening the community despite these challenges:

"Black women are holding the Black community up. Without them, the whole community would fall."
[24:08]

4. Community Reaction and Societal Challenges

DL Whisperer discusses the resistance he faces from various communities, including the gay community, Black community, and his own support base. He explains how exposing DL men often leads to backlash and lack of support.

Key Quote:

"They try to disconnect the DL man from the community. DL men are literally just gay men."
[26:11]

5. Behavioral Patterns and Personality Traits of DL Men

A significant portion of the conversation is dedicated to identifying the red flags associated with DL men. DL Whisperer outlines key personality traits that signal a man might be living a DL life.

Key Traits Identified:

• Narcissism:
  "Every DL man is a narcissist, but not all narcissists are DL men."
  [49:15]

• Misogyny:
  "When you can tell when a man hates women, he's gonna always put them down."
  [49:15]

• Impulsivity:
  "They can't control their impulses, which is a big problem."
  [51:08]

6. Health Risks and Social Implications

The podcast addresses the heightened health risks women face when involved with DL men, particularly concerning sexually transmitted infections (STIs).

Key Quote:

"Women are five times more likely to catch HIV if they're dealing with men that are sleeping with men."
[32:13]

7. Personal Reflections and Burnout

Ebony shares her own experiences with burnout, feeling the pressure to conform to industry standards that favor a more sensationalized portrayal of women over substantive, educational content. This segues into a conversation about the challenges of maintaining authenticity while striving for growth.

Key Quote:

"I feel like I should be having all these opportunities, but sometimes I get breadcrumbs."
[40:00]

8. Safety Concerns and Personal Security

The discussion touches on the personal safety risks DL Whisperer faces due to his outspoken stance and exposure of DL men.

Key Quote:

"Someone already tried to take my life."
[47:08]

He reassures listeners of his measures to stay safe:

"I typically live in gated communities... Unless you're gonna do something at the airport or a club, you won't catch me."
[47:38]

9. The Intersection of Racism and Sexuality

DL Whisperer delves into how racism exacerbates the issues surrounding DL men, particularly within the Black community. He connects historical oppression to present-day challenges in addressing and understanding DL culture.

Key Quote:

"Black men are the epitome of masculinity, and white supremacy forces them into humiliating situations."
[22:31]

10. Conclusion and Tease for Part Two

As the episode wraps up, DL Whisperer and Ebony summarize the critical points discussed and hint at deeper explorations in the upcoming second part of the series.

Key Quote:

"This concludes part one of this week's episode. Part two is really where we get into some things."
[51:50]

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Final Thoughts: Part 1 of "Pretty Private: Down Low Men Exposed" provides an unflinching look into the lives of DL men, the repercussions for their partners, and the broader societal and cultural implications. DL Whisperer's candid storytelling and insightful analysis aim to enlighten and empower listeners to recognize and navigate the complexities of DL relationships.

For those seeking deeper understanding and actionable advice, Part 2 promises to delve further into strategies for women to protect themselves and the ongoing battle against the stigma and secrecy surrounding DL men.

Stay Tuned: Don’t miss the second part of this compelling series. Subscribe to The Breakfast Club on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or your preferred podcast platform to stay updated.

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps:

• [00:04] DL Whisperer: "The best kind of help is the kind you don't even have to ask for..."
• [02:32] DL Whisperer: "A Download man is a man that either has been with men..."
• [05:23] DL Whisperer: "After five years, I was like, are we getting married?"
• [24:08] DL Whisperer: "Black women are holding the Black community up. Without them, the whole community would fall."
• [49:15] DL Whisperer: "Every DL man is a narcissist, but not all narcissists are DL men."
• [32:13] DL Whisperer: "Women are five times more likely to catch HIV if they're dealing with men that are sleeping with men."
• [47:08] DL Whisperer: "Someone already tried to take my life."
• [22:31] DL Whisperer: "Black men are the epitome of masculinity, and white supremacy forces them into humiliating situations."

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Connect with the Show: Follow Pretty Private Podcast on Instagram and TikTok, and subscribe to their YouTube channel to stay engaged with upcoming discussions and episodes.

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This summary was crafted to provide a comprehensive overview of the episode "Pretty Private: Down Low Men Exposed: Part 1 with the DL Whisperer." For the full experience and nuanced insights, listening to the actual podcast is highly recommended.

Transcript

[Ebony]

This is an iHeart podcast.

[DL Whisperer]

The best kind of help is the kind you don't even have to ask for. Like your friend pulling up on moving day with a truck, a speaker, and snacks ready to go. Well, that's the energy you get with AT&T's new guarantee. If there's ever a network interruption, they make it right by giving you credit for a full day of service. Proactively credit for Fiber downtime lasting 20 minutes or more or wireless downtime lasting 60 minutes or more caused by a single incident impacting 10 or more towers. Restrictions and exclusions apply. See att.com guaranty for full details. AT&T connecting changes everything. Welcome to Pretty Private with ebony, a space where no question is off limits and storylines become lifelines. The views shared by our guests are meant to inform, entertain, and empower. From the laughs to the lessons. Just remember, tough times don't last, but professional homegirls do. Enjoy the show.

[Ebony]

What's up, y'? All? I hope all is cute. It's your girl Ebony here. And welcome back to Pretty Private. Now, this week on the show, I had the absolute pleasure of sitting down with DL Whisperer, someone who shedding light on conversations most people are too afraid to have. Now, in part one of our conversation, we dive into his personal journey, journey with DL men, and how those experiences led him to create a platform that not only informs but also challenges the way we think about DL culture, black relationships, and taboo topics within our community. So get ready, because my conversation with DL Whisperer starts now. All right, to my guest. Thank you so much for being a guest on Pretty Private. How are you doing? How you feeling?

[DL Whisperer]

Yeah, I'm feeling great. It's Sunday, it's early. This is my prime time, early in the morning, so I feel great.

[Ebony]

Yes, child. He got me recording on a Sunday on the Lord's day. I said, I know that's right. Well, for those who may not know, I love your work. I discover you on one of my favorite YouTubers, Storm Row. Shout out to him. And I was just so intrigued with what you're doing because I feel like you're literally doing God's work. You're being very informative, that very helpful, very insightful, and I can only imagine the flack that you do receive from certain people. But before we start, can you please let people know what is a Download Men?

[DL Whisperer]

So a Download man is a man that either has been with men, has desires to be with men, or I mean, essentially either he wants to be with men or he has been with men. And he's secretly doing it, but he's keeping his heterosexual identity. So essentially dating women, marrying women, but sleeping with me and secretly. That's the cut and draw difference.

[Ebony]

Right. So would you say there's a difference between a down low man and a closeted man? Because I feel like it's a very thin line. Right.

[DL Whisperer]

It's a. I just made a video about that. There's a big. Because I feel like it's semantics technically, and I hate semantics. So I know people are like, oh, I respect the closeted man. But I'm like, technically the same thing. Like, the only difference is we assume a closeted man isn't pursuing women and that they're just only pursuing men. But people just don't know about their sexuality. But I don't know many closeted men because that's discreet, as gay people would call it.

[Ebony]

But exactly. That's why I was like, let me ask this question. Because I feel like the line is very thin between the two.

[DL Whisperer]

To me it's the same. But people love semantics. So I just let them. They want to use it. Because even the whole gay and by, like, men are either gay or they're straight. I don't do bi. Like it's. Let's keep it cut and dry. Like, I don't like the semantics of it all.

[Ebony]

Listen, if we both on all fours, it's the same baby.

[DL Whisperer]

Because a lot of people have been asking like, what's the difference? And I'm just like, I don't really talk about it because there's really no difference. Because regardless, you're not gonna know if a man is. If he's sleeping with women or if you think that he's straight. You're not gonna know he's secretly with men regardless of if he's closeted or DL so they both do the same thing. It's one we're assuming is not. Is not affecting women.

[Ebony]

Yeah. So what inspired you to start helping women detect men who identify as or who are down low? Because I was reading your, listening to your videos and stuff and I'm like, wow, like, you've been doing this for a very long time.

[DL Whisperer]

Yeah. So what originally inspired me, I guess you could say, is because, okay, when I like, I always tell people I was never with Download Men as, like, you see some people do it for like competition, I guess you could say. I don't approach men. So if a man approached me, I was never gonna assume he was down low. This is where that closeted comes into play. I'M gonna assume you're closeted. But then I find out you're into women and all of this. Now I know that you're down low, so it makes it a lot different. And I wasn't too privy about the dating, so I didn't look at it as a bad thing. When men told me that they were down low, it's like, okay, that's your sexuality. That has nothing to do with me. So by me not really knowing what down low was throughout dating, I. You know, I learned what it was, and I learned the way that they moved. And, like, I always tell people, like, there was instances where my life was almost taken, so. Where my life was almost. Yeah.

[Ebony]

Oh, wow. So I was listening to that video. We don't have to say the name, but did you try to, like, confront him or.

[DL Whisperer]

I tried to leave him, actually, because I had essentially, you know, after a couple years, I'm like, okay, are we getting married? Because at this point, it's, like, been five years.

[Ebony]

Like, what we doing, nigga?

[DL Whisperer]

Yeah, what we doing? So he was like, we're never gonna get married. Like, his parents were going through a divorce. It was a lot of stuff. So for me, I'm done. But then, you know how it was a month later, it was late at night, we was texting. I let him come over. Shit didn't go how I needed to go, and he couldn't get hard. Like, so when he couldn't get hard, I'm like, well, this is a sign from God that we're not even supposed to be right here right now, right?

[Ebony]

Not gonna get hard, aside from God, Chad.

[DL Whisperer]

So I just. You know, I was trying to. I was just telling him, like, well, this is a sign. And he just couldn't, you know? And then I was growing on social media, so he had built this paranoia in his head that somehow when we are completely done, since I was leaving him, that I was gonna go do story times then, you know, expose him, right? I told him, after five years, don't you think after so many things that had happened, if I was gonna expose you, I would have done that. But see, that's when I realized, like, their paranoia, it had nothing to do with me. It had with him thinking that his secret could even be exposed because I knew his secret. And now that I'm with you, because usually you don't see gay men leaving the DL, man. So even me doing that was like, a big, like, oh, wow, like, you're leaving me. Like, yo, like, I'm done.

[Ebony]

So how did it end with all of that.

[DL Whisperer]

Like, he tried to, you know, kill me. He ended up going to jail. I ended up exposing him against the police wishes. And then I got doxxed that that was the end. I never saw him again. We had one conversation since besides him doxxing me, but that was it. Because once we get physical and then like, I know people when they hear like, oh, he tried to save my life. Like, I'm not playing, like when I say knives, candles, biting, like just non stop fighting for like 30 minutes. And if you're from Atlanta or you live in it, take Atlanta police forever to get somewhere. Like, if I wanna, if I. Like I always tell people, if I couldn't have defended myself, I wouldn't even be here when the. They're like, don't expose him. Like, you don't know what that's gonna do to his mental.

[Ebony]

Wait, the police was encouraging not to expose him?

[DL Whisperer]

Yeah, they was encouraging me to essentially allow him to do all of which he did to me because they only took him to jail because I pressed the issue. Like, they weren't even going to take him to jail. He was driving with no license, duis, all of this. Then they didn't give a. He had stole my wallet, my iPad, all of this. Like they're arresting him and they're taking out all of my. And they're like, oh. Because they thought I was lying. They didn't believe. From that point, I was like, okay. Because I had never been in a situation with the police and a deal man. And then I realized, like, this wasn't what I thought.

[Ebony]

Yeah.

[DL Whisperer]

And then that's when I was like, okay. Even as far as the women, like, you know, I had a deal guy that I was talking to. Me and his baby mamas kept getting to it. And so. So I was like, you know, for me, I wanted to help women because I was like, I said I was a little bit younger, so I was more so beefing with them. Like, we're going back and forth. Whereas, like, I always tell the deal dudes now because I still talk to some of them, just, you know, because I'd be letting them know I should have went against you. I have been beefing with women, even though women were beefing with me, like they were approaching me, but I still should have thought, like, maybe I should team up with them because the man.

[Ebony]

Is in the room because essentially he's playing us both.

[DL Whisperer]

Thank you. And it wasn't. That's why I was like, I didn't beef with so Many women about men, that it. Well, they beef with me. But it's the fact that people be surprised because they'll think that when women hear that their man is the ill, that that's it. And it's like, no, a lot of them don't leave. They'll just. Just, like, they'll beef with a woman. They're gonna beef with that gay boy.

[Ebony]

Which I am so surprised that in 2025, we are still going through this.

[DL Whisperer]

I know.

[Ebony]

Like, it's very shocking to me.

[DL Whisperer]

I see why, though. Why do you want somebody. People don't know how to be alone. And I was like that, too. So I was willing to accept literally anything because, like, I always tell my family, like, it played into how I was raised. That's why we still people. How people are raised plays such a big part in who they become. So once I started going to therapy and realizing a lot of my toxic traits, that. That made me not even want to be with you, man. Because it made me realize, like, their whole existence is alive. It's a lie. Like, they're. They're. Everything is built on lies. And then once I saw. When I came to everybody with what happened to me, and I saw everybody's reaction, I was just, like, a little shocked because people didn't have sympathy. Not that I wanted it, but it was like, he became the victim. They become the victims. And I'm just like, are people. Like, I understand it's not okay to expose somebody's sexuality, but the things that.

[Ebony]

They do, but also, don't force my hands.

[DL Whisperer]

Right. That's why I say, like, if he would have never attacked me, he would have never got exposed. And then from there, when somebody tried to take your life, and that's the serious matter. So, like, I always tell people I should have got off social media, but I had my mental breakdown that I was gonna have regardless. I had it on social media, which is how all of these other men got exposed. Because I was pissed, like, you know, because some of them were reaching out, blaming me, too. So I'm just, like, everybody blaming me for actions that somebody else done. Like, at the end of the day, I can't make somebody attack me and try to.

[Ebony]

Yeah, and how were you raised? Because I think you make. That's a really good point. I always say that childhood makes or breaks your adulthood.

[DL Whisperer]

So I was raised, like, split. Like, when I was with my mother, very toxic. But when I was with my great grandmother, very Christian, very. Like, I feel like I contribute most of my personality and my the good parts of me to my great grandmother.

[Ebony]

But my mom do have an old soul.

[DL Whisperer]

Yeah, I'm always toxic. So that's why I always tell people like that toxicness is in there. Because me, my mom was very, very toxic. And like I always tell people I. It was this one DL dude and he the one who made me even realize to start self reflecting it because he wasn't a bad person. And I guess we will say he was closeted, but, you know, I kind of treated him terribly and I. That was the first time I ever got cut off by anybody. So it made me start reflecting that. I realized like the way that you're treating people, this is not love. But I thought it was love because like, like I said, people are from. You'll get cussed out, be everything and then you're okay. Yeah, you'll fight, cuz, scream, say some of the most hateful and then you're okay.

[Ebony]

Yeah. But I realized the norm. That's how we. That's how I grew up.

[DL Whisperer]

Yeah, but that's toxic, right?

[Ebony]

No, it is.

[DL Whisperer]

Some people. I was with a man that had never got cussed out. His mama had never cussed at him. So when I'm cussing him out, calling him all types of and he couldn't take it, and I'm just like, left.

[Ebony]

Your ass too, nigga. Like, who you talking to?

[DL Whisperer]

To me, I'm like, this just tough love. Like, I mean, when you get mad, you say sometimes that might hurt people. I had to realize that's. That's not love, you know. So that's why I always say like, it was the combination. That's why I never. I'm not mad at D, man, because they helped me learn a lot about myself and the world in general. Because I know we can't say no names, but maybe when we're not recording, I'll tell you some stories. But the amount of men that are DL is crazy, celebrity wise. Yeah.

[Ebony]

Oh, yeah. Yeah.

[DL Whisperer]

And people always think I'm like, I like Atlanta now. That's why I said I'll tell you. So I will talk about that after. But yeah, that's why I'm like, I had TV shows in college, all of this. So the DL thing has always been something that, you know, I've been, you know, kind of trying to help people with. Because with the TV shows, that was going to help people, but a deal, man. Stop, dude. So you know, when I realized, like, okay, I don't really need a TV show or I don't need other platforms or other people to help me spread this information, I can just literally record a video. So once I really got into that and I finally decided, like, I didn't care what my job thought because I've always worked in public education.

[Ebony]

So, you know, working, you definitely give me educator vibes. Like, child, you pull out them notes and you get the teaching. No, that's right.

[DL Whisperer]

But, you know, this was because this is part of why I lost my job. Because this is too controversial. Yeah, I knew. That's why I wasn't associating my name with it. But once I got doxed again and people associated it to my name, I didn't really have a choice, so, you know, kind of go with it. And that's why I was like, for me, it just made me realize, like, this is what I'm supposed to be doing. Because this had nothing. My. I was the best at my job. Nobody else could do financial aid and still can't do it how I do it. But it's the fact that this right here, me helping women. And think about it. I worked with all black women managed by black women, and they were the ones who got rid of me because of this type of content. I'm just like, you would have thought they would have been more appreciative because I'm literally just trying to help women in general.

[Ebony]

And what does this have to do with my nine to five, Right?

[DL Whisperer]

Well, they said they didn't want this to reflect on them because again, it makes sense. Like, people coming up at the school, like, you know, they. I got it. That's why I was like, for a long time, I didn't really help women publicly. Like, I've always helped my friends. Like, if they send me a dude, you think he gay? Imma let them know, like, your baby daddy doing some questionable stuff. I'm gonna let you know. Like, I've always. That's why I say, like, essentially now I'm just giving women on the Internet the same advice that I give women in my everyday life. Like my best friends and my. My acquaintances and just women. Because, I mean, like, I always say, I've never been the type of gay guy that felt like in competition with women, hated women. Because for me, you're.

[Ebony]

I don't get those vibes from you at all.

[DL Whisperer]

Yeah, I was about to say, because it's a lot of women that feel like they go through that. But I'm like, I know that I'm a man, and I know that you're a woman. If a man, he doesn't want me for the reasons that he wants you. So there's no competition ever. We are complete different things. So I feel like with knowing that it was never because a lot of gay men have women mentalities where everybody is all competition, like competing with everybody. And it's like it's just one sided because I mean, they could never compete with women. But you can't tell some of them that.

[Ebony]

What's up, y'? All? It's your girl Ebony here. And be sure to follow me on Instagram and tick tock at pretty private podcast. And don't forget to subscribe to my YouTube channel at the end. Professional home girl. Now let's get back to the show. Listen, quick story time. So I was in Paris, right? I went to go see Beyonce perform and I met this guy through a friend that was with me and come to find out he was gay. I feel like this was the version of me, like, for real, like, we had such a good time. So it was another guy that we noticed us in the same rooms with us, whatever. And I feel like he was like, maybe not on the DL, but probably just not fully out and on. The only reason why I said that is because when he saw me, when I tell you, he was staring at me. And I ain't gonna lie, the was fine. So I'm like, is he gay or does he like me or you know what I'm saying? So eventually we went to some other spots or whatever and it was predominantly where, you know, the girls was at. And I see him with a. So I'm like. And he saw me, so I can tell he got a little uncomfortable. But I was like, no, it'd be cool to snap because I'm like, everybody want. Cause he was fine. And so I was telling my homeboy and he was like, because the guy ended up following me on Instagram. So I follow him back, whatever, and I tell him my homeboy, he was like, well, send me his page. And he's like, I made the best win. And I was like, child, it's so true what you're saying, that like a lot of these men, like, I could just tell how tense he got. Like every time he would see me with our mutual friends, like, he would not be comfortable. But when I walk away and I watch him from like, you know, him not knowing, I. I'm like, look at this. I'm like, boy, just be free. It's 20, 25 and it's all in.

[DL Whisperer]

Their head for the most part. That's what they don't get like they think everybody's just judging them, which a lot of them know that now. A lot of them also know a woman isn't going to want them if she knows that he's in man. So a lot of them, they have an attraction for women. Like, I mean, listen, I like I always tell people I wouldn't be with a woman, but I can look at a woman and find a woman attract. So there are going to be men that are going to go further than that and they still might not want to be with a woman. And some DL men actually want to be with women, but they just have these secret little kinks for men. So that's always. You kind of got to know where you at with a man. Because, I mean, is any man straight? I think that's kind of like a defect at this point. If a man is straight, it's defective because where are the straight men? Well, maybe not online. Let me be clear. There are straight men very small. It's the very small percentage. Peace.

[Ebony]

Because I can't find no man child or no man ain't found me. But you make a good point because I had a conversation with this with one of my other guests and her story is with finding out that her husband was on a DL and I think he had A's. And she lived in Atlanta and. Right. And she was saying how she don't believe that no man is straight.

[DL Whisperer]

Well, in Atlanta now, that's you, one of the capitals. If you in Houston, Atlanta, New York, Miami, New York.

[Ebony]

I'm in New York.

[DL Whisperer]

Okay. Yeah. I hope you're not in like none of the burrows. Near none of the burrows. No.

[Ebony]

You think all of them gay.

[DL Whisperer]

Don't. And don't let them be Puerto Rican.

[Ebony]

Oh, come on now. I know about the poppies now.

[DL Whisperer]

Okay.

[Ebony]

You know, freaky. So.

[DL Whisperer]

But. But listen who you think like the poppies?

[Ebony]

The.

[DL Whisperer]

The.

[Ebony]

I know.

[DL Whisperer]

That's all I'm like, if it's a bunch of them and it's a bunch of somewhere, you gotta start watching. That's why I told women about the app store going because I mean, at this point, these deal men are so lazy that of course they're gonna go to an app and just get on their person 200ft away, right next door. It's easy.

[Ebony]

So you. Do you think the white man's words at I really want to be with a. But.

[DL Whisperer]

I think you'll have more transparency with a white man. But I think I always tell women like, I wouldn't at this point. In time, I would not put all of my eggs in especially one basket. But especially not just black men, you know, because I think that the amount of black men that have not been conquered by white supremacy and all of the other bullshit that has been thrown at our community, I think that they're already taken for starters. And it's such a small number that you're going to be picking for needles in a haystack. So it's like open it up because a lot of other men will appreciate. I mean, I think in general a straight man isn't going to be so concerned about race, but they're also not going to be self hating. So let's make that clear because it's like always people about interracial dating, you just have to weed out those people. Like if you meet a black man that doesn't date black women, big red flag. If you meet.

[Ebony]

I always say that, yeah, like mama.

[DL Whisperer]

Black, thank you, you came from somebody. But how can you not like self hating people? That's the prerequisite for a man to be deal. So as long as you're not those man, a white man that, oh, I don't date white women. I only want black women. Okay, so you have a fetish. Okay, cool. If you're cool with being a fetish. That's why I always tell people, just know what you're getting yourself into when you're dating certain ethnic groups. Because you have to know that's a fact.

[Ebony]

Do you think that some of these men are addicted to living a double life?

[DL Whisperer]

Are they addicted or can they just get away with it easily? I'm not even gonna. I do think some of them are addicted, but I think it's more so I, and I don't give them no excuses. But it's like a society thing because even now, like I tell people I know plenty of people like sports players. Let's, let's do sports specifically that if the world was to find out their deal, they're off of the team. Like they will never play again if it's confirmed. Now if it's just a rumor and there's no proof or nothing there. But I feel like society just it, it does demonize people that are not straight in certain positions. So that's why we say like you have to know what type of man you're dating if you're dating a man. That like if you're dating a coach. I. Coaches need a wife and kids to make that whole aesthetic work. Like, you know, the image works. So you have to know which type of man? Like, when you're in these music industries, podcast, anything with fine arts or the media, you need a lot of men that are going to need beard.

[Ebony]

You know, that's so crazy you said that. Because one of my homeboys, he works in the industry, and he was like, girl, he said, you ain't gonna get no man in this industry. He was like, in you in media. He said, either they gay a horse. He was like, you're not gonna find anybody. And I was like, for real? He was like. And that's who was telling me, like, you might as well just get you a white man. I see you. Or get a other man. He was like, Cause you ain't gonna get no. All these are either gay or they nasty. Because.

[DL Whisperer]

Especially for black men, because we are the epitome of masculinity. A lot of them, when they're getting to these heights they have, they're having say. And I. And I hate to bring racism to it, but I have to. They're having to go through these white men that are going to make them do things that are humiliating, demeaning, that makes them hate themselves. Because the whole. The whole objective is for black men especially to not feel good about themselves. Like, all of this. Look what that repression does. Like, look how you always see where the athlete gets with that white woman. And then look what always end up happening.

[Ebony]

Yeah, but it goes back to slavery. That's how they used to break the household down. They'll break the man down, right? Come on, now. One thing about professional homegirls, we know something now. Break the man down. And once he break the man down, then everybody else in the household follows because the man is the head of the household. And once you take that from a man, his dignity. That's it.

[DL Whisperer]

And see, this is. And this is the good part. Black women, it didn't work on black women because I feel like what they. What happened, it worked on black men, but it made black women stronger. That's why I always tell black women, like, when you hear somebody calling you stronger, that those are used to make you think that you being strong and independent is bad. But you had to be, because you couldn't depend on your men facts. They didn't want y' all to be strong and independent. But I'm like, that's what's holding the black community up is black women. Like, if black women had been conquered by men or they let black men conquer them, the whole black community is going to be done. It's not standing on black Men, like, think about anytime there's a political movement, who's at the forefront, Black men or black women?

[Ebony]

Yeah.

[DL Whisperer]

Anytime there's anything, anything is women. Because black men are cowards.

[Ebony]

Yeah. Oh, child.

[DL Whisperer]

When you go back to the racism and all of that, that's why I always tell people, like, the deal thing is so much deeper than just that. Because I was like, even, like, when we get into the STDs that they put in this community, I was like, everything that they done to break the black community, it somewhat worked, but what they didn't account for is that it affected their communities, too. Exactly.

[Ebony]

And that's when it becomes a problem.

[DL Whisperer]

That's when it becomes a problem. And that's why now it is more so about just elitists. Like, they don't care. They always knew that all white people would not have the same white supremacy. Like, it was about the elite people of the society.

[Ebony]

Prime example, when everybody was doing drugs. Been doing drugs for any time. But then when these white kids started doing drugs and getting high and overdosing on opioids, oh, it was an epidemic. It was a problem.

[DL Whisperer]

And that's why I say, I hate to make it so black and white, but me, too. Integrated for 75 years. So we have to go back to. Like, if you go back to now, you're like, I mean, it started black and white. You were either white or you were colored or mulatto. So that's why I always tell I'm not making it black and white. But that's where it started. Because, like, I. Even with the lgbt, I don't ever consider myself a part of lgbt, because if you look at how the LGBT community was formed, it was formed for white people, so they didn't hate themselves. Because if you go back. So before we were colonized, African people. Because men love to bring up Africans when they want to talk about Pearsons and other girly things that they're doing to beautify themselves. But if you go back and really study, all African cultures had two. Or they felt like their. Their people were two. Spirited, where they had a male spirit, woman spirit. Like, sexuality wasn't a thing. I was like, white people started putting everything into categories and everything. Like, think about it. Like, if we would have never been colonized, it would be no straight, gay or whatever. People just were people.

[Ebony]

Yeah, yeah. And then you also mentioned in one of your videos that you felt like the community wasn't really with you.

[DL Whisperer]

They don't.

[Ebony]

Oh, they. They still don't. Why is that you.

[DL Whisperer]

Somebody Gay community, right.

[Ebony]

Yeah.

[DL Whisperer]

Because they don't like to hear the truth. Like, as you can see, like, I'm not. I'm not going to say good things about people. I'm going to just speak the truth. And they try to disconnect the DL man from the community. And I, like, I always tell them, like, DL men are literally just gay men. So I know people love to say, well, they're making gay men look bad. Well, this is where gay men need to take accountability. That's why I honestly thought when I started this whole process, I'm like, okay, there's going to be so many other people that are going to come in and add their information. This was not that.

[Ebony]

Yeah.

[DL Whisperer]

It was so much negative from. And from like the trans community, the gay community, the black community, or the. My community really don't count because they're so small. I don't even think it's. No. Openly by men.

[Ebony]

Yeah, I think it's either. Yeah.

[DL Whisperer]

Yeah. I was about to say semantics, but yeah. So they were just upset because they felt like a lot of them did tell me, like, they felt like I was holding up a mirror and they didn't like seeing essentially themselves. And some people, it was just traumatic. And I get it. It's a traumatic experience. Like, for women, it's a traumatic experience. For some gay men, like, it's tr. That's what I always say. Like, DL men don't help anybody but themselves. So that's why I was confused on why everybody teamed up against me, because they don't help nobody. Like, I've never heard somebody say a DL man came into their life and brought them so much joy. Have you?

[Ebony]

I ain't never heard no like that. That's so funny. I. Yo, one thing about this podcast, I didn't have so many different conversations because another woman who I was talking to, we was talking about her journey with her being promiscuous, and she. We were talking about the Download Men, and she was saying how she was at a party with her homeboy and her homeboy saw her friend with a. And almost like, I know that from somewhere. I don't know where. You already smiling. So she was like, well, how you know him? Because he had just got out of jail, come to find out the was with his jail bunkie. And he was like. She was like, we need to go tell my homegirl. So he went to go tell her homegirl was like, hey, like, you know, I'm not trying to be mess or anything. I'm just looking out for you, I just want you to know what your man been doing when he was in jail. And the denied it and she believed her man, obviously. But then until the jail monkey had called him and stepped to her like a woman and she still didn't believe it. And I'm like, girl, she want a man. You cannot want a man that bad, child.

[DL Whisperer]

I'm telling you, some people, like literally, because you know, I help women too. So I, I talk to so many women. I'm telling you, some women want a man that bad, like to the point that, I mean, we ain't even gotta get into no too much. But like I always say, these deal men are perverted, they're deviant. So some women would, let's just say, put others at risk to keep these men, like maybe their kids and stuff. Because, you know, like I said, I don't want to trigger nobody. But so that's why I always say, like some women will do a lot to keep them in.

[Ebony]

Is there a particular story you're thinking about?

[DL Whisperer]

Yeah, but because this, this one girl I was talking to, essentially her man, who already she was calling me to ask, you know, is he deal? Etc. But when we started getting into it and she was just telling me some instances where, you know, he's naked and hard in front of her daughters and he's picking the kids up hard and they're naked and just a whole lot of nakedness and weird, you know what you mean? But she was saying that he was telling her, well, me and my dad done this pretty much my whole life.

[Ebony]

And I was just, oh no.

[DL Whisperer]

I was just like, you see him and his dad done it their whole life. He doesn't, he doesn't see it's something wrong here. And that's why I was like. A lot of men that are DL have been touched and they haven't talked about it. I mean, not to say that that's gonna make somebody bdl, but I think a lot of men have went through some type of assault that they just don't talk about because they don't think that even if it's a woman that has done it, they don't want to talk. I always say, like when she was telling me that and I hear a lot of perverted stories that involve kids or animals like that for me be red flags, like for animals. Yeah, like this girl, her man, she was doing something with horses. Like she was the horse rider or you know, whatever they do, whatever you call it.

[Ebony]

Horses got big dicks.

[DL Whisperer]

Her man made her stop working with the horses because he thought she would a horse. And I was just like, girl, that's bestiality. The fact that he even got that thought in his mind and the fact that he really push the issue that serious to make you stop working horses. I was like, something's off there. She still wants him. He doesn't really want her.

[Ebony]

Yeah, because he want the horse.

[DL Whisperer]

The thing is, she flew all the way from Norway to America.

[Ebony]

And he.

[DL Whisperer]

Showed me some pictures. I was like, you could do so much better than her. I was like, listen, you don't know how white supremacy and how white man. I was like, you over here worried about this white man that's the redneck in a trailer park that's doing methamphetamines with his dad, thinking, you gonna a horse. Like, I was just like, girl, you should have stayed in Norway. I'm like, you could have had any white man. This is what you think is like, you know? I'm like, yo, you don't know the culture. And that's why I always tell people, know the culture. She was like, I don't like Norwegian guys. Like, okay. I'm like, I still.

[Ebony]

You still. Why you with a crackhead?

[DL Whisperer]

Thank you. She was like, well, his body. Like, who cares?

[Ebony]

But see, this is why we gotta hold our sister, us accountable. Because it's like, come on, girl, you. You can't be this slow. Like, I'm not. I'll never judge anybody, but sometimes I'd be like, girl, yeah, come on. Now.

[DL Whisperer]

I hear a lot of women that be thinking, just because the man got a big dick, that somehow that's supposed to mean something. It's like, is dick paying your bills? Is dick making you feel good?

[Ebony]

Right.

[DL Whisperer]

Would that come with all of these other problems? And you might end up with some fevers, some aches, and some chills. So it's like, it really worth it. And I'm not saying that it ain't.

[Ebony]

Funny, y', all I'm saying. But it's true, though. It's true.

[DL Whisperer]

Because I be making me so mad. Or he's so cute. Like, okay, you're gonna. He's so cute into a incurable std. Like, numbers. Women are five times more likely to catch HIV if they're dealing with men that are sleeping with men. They're 78 more likely to have catch stis if they deal with men that are sleeping with men. So it's like, it's. Your chances are gonna increase significantly high. So that's why we felt. I'm like, this Is not something you kind of want to play with because, see, me as a gay man, I know that these men don't get tested because a lot of women will be with men, and they're never going to get tested together. Their man is never getting tested. He's relying on her to get tested, to tell him if he got something like that. So that's why I'd be saying, like, I think a lot of women be oblivious because they're like, it can never be my man. And it's like, a lot of these men are like that, like, and they think I just be being dramatic. It's like, no. Because even people always say, I didn't have so many male friends that were straight. I show me a straight man at this point. And I try not to say that out loud because I still have some male friends that I presume are straight that haven't tried to have sex with me yet. But again, show me a straight man. I don't know any man that are 100 straight. That's all. When people ask me, like, what do you. What. What is a straight man? Like, tell us who you think is straight. I have to think really hard. The only person that almost that has me somewhat convinced is Terence Howard. And I mean, because of what, you know, what happened recently when they were trying to get him to play Marvin Gaye.

[Ebony]

And how do you feel about that?

[DL Whisperer]

Because I saw that clip, okay, boom, this goes back into the white people. Instead of getting a gay man to play Marvin Gaye, since you know there's going to be gay scenes, you want to see the fantasy of a straight man, and they want to break that straight man down. Because imagine if he kissing a man and doing all of this on screen, what is that going to do to his masculinity? Or even though it's already probably fragile, it's gonna break you.

[Ebony]

Yeah.

[DL Whisperer]

And they were just trying to do that because he. They know that he's straight. Like he said about his empire. That was really hit, like, how he felt. And I'm not mad at him. Be homophobic. I mean, I. I don't know, like, me. Be what you want to be. I mean, I think, oh, straight men are going to be a little bit homophobic because, I mean, I'm sure they can't fathom the gay. I wouldn't expect them to. They're not gay. So it is like, it's ignorance. Ultimately, homophobia is just, again, semantics. Like, it's just ignorance. Like, they just don't understand it. They don't and they shouldn't. They're not gay. But I feel like, again, it's always going to be that. Those type of things that happen, like, think about it. Every black man, especially that we hear about getting into the industry, oh, I had to put on a dress or I had to do this or I had to do that. Something that would compromise their masculinity and that they didn't want to do. Like, even with Will Smith, Seven Degrees of Power, he was gay as hell in that. That movie, though, because a lot of people don't know that movie. So they don't know when these.

[Ebony]

I have to watch that movie when.

[DL Whisperer]

They be forced to do this type of stuff. And it really be dumb, though, because we don't have to talk online because this too, is who.

[Ebony]

I'm just saying, you say names, I'm gonna beep it out. But do you think he's gay?

[DL Whisperer]

Yes. Are you? Do you. Are you? Are you? Have you?

[Ebony]

Okay, no, ask me, ask me.

[DL Whisperer]

I'm saying, like, you don't. Have you? I mean, do you? I don't keep up with him all the way.

[Ebony]

Yeah.

[DL Whisperer]

But even from the, like, the stuff. Because when I was doing research on him, because, you know, I. People ask me to look into people. All of them videos he got kissing his son in the mouth. Done. I was done with it. Like, all is too much, that movie. All of the videos, kissing his son in the mouth. All of that stuff with August Alsina became a little blurry. On if August Alsina was there.

[Ebony]

I wasn't. Well, no, you could. That's fine. Because I wasn't expecting August to be gay. That took me. That was a wild card. Yeah. I mean, I see now looking back, but when we first was introduced to him, like, I don't know, it's just. I didn't see it.

[DL Whisperer]

That he's in the industry. Think of, like, do you think everybody.

[Ebony]

In the industry is gay?

[DL Whisperer]

Okay, I want you to tell me somebody in the industry that you think is straight, and then we're gonna see. Just. Just throw out a name that you think of a straight man that you think is in the industry. Have you. I've done a video on him. If you go on my YouTube, that that's the last person I'm gonna think of straight. When you look into all of this stuff with. To all of these other men, that. That football player man, that he was living with, his perversion, he. He literally feels all of the boxes out to be a deal man. And like I said, when you do all of your research. I don't think he's straight at all. Like, I, I honest. These type of men that have a lot of status and power, he could have never kept it without having the woman that everybody essentially wants. That's why I always say, you're gonna have those women that are gonna be great beards, like, and I'm sorry, I keep saying names, you're fine, you're gonna have those people. But yeah, I think essentially became a beard. Because if you really pay attention, it was before they were the same age, almost like underage. Like, it's a lot of stuff that get kind of murky there. He, he been around too many people, him and Diddy. It's too many connections for me as a person that has logic to think that all of these things are lies. Even if you look at some of the old interviews, Wendy Williams and all of these other people from back in the day, they've been saying some of this stuff. It's just nobody was really listening. So when I started putting new facts and old facts together, it all made sense.

[Ebony]

So who do you think is straight in the industry?

[DL Whisperer]

Who do I think is straight in the industry? I don't think nobody's straight because even I'm telling you, they're not going to. Let's just talk about this. Every man that you see in the industry, what is their ultimate. They're all chasing money, right? Okay, Money and power. Who has the money and power though? Who, who are they gonna have to go through? Because even Jay Z, we see that he's over the NFL, he's pretty powerful. He can get people out of jail and everything. But what just happened to him? He got a little bit humbled for a second to let him know, like, okay, you're not above the program. That's why I say, like, it's always gonna still be a white man at the top. No black man is gonna ban the Vanguard family. If you look into, it's five families that essentially operate all of the wealth in America. And if you look at how the thirteen colonies were formed from the Europeans and all of that, those families then connect back to that like it's countries of that we'll never be able to get through. That's why they say, like, they're gonna have to go to white people and it's never gonna work because those white men always, they're gonna make them do things that they might not want to do.

[Ebony]

That's crazy. I believe it though. I really do believe. I do believe, because even when you think of all these people who just popped out of nowhere and they just like, they it. And I'm just like, wow. Like, I'm like, ebony, you can't be so hard on yourself because the game is rigged.

[DL Whisperer]

Thank you. It's right. Because you're. Unless you're willing to essentially at this point in the game, unless you're willing to be like. Because I could just tell, like, you're a classy woman. You carry yourself intelligence and grace. They don't like that. They want you to be showing these other black women that you need to be shaking your ass and doing this. So until you like. And I hate to say it, but that's what they want. The black community, they want women to feel like this. I was like, the amount of women's that be at baddies auditions and fighting, and now I was like, they want that. They got sexy red and all of these other people going to school. They want women to think that, especially black women. That's how y' all are. It used to be a time where we would be arguing about education. I still argue about stuff like that because I'm highly educated. People are not caring about that now at all. You get what I'm saying? Like, it used to be old same people for doing certain shit, for not being especially women.

[Ebony]

Yes. So I had a moment and I shared this with my audience before where I had, like, experienced extreme burned out. And I've been doing this for seven years. And I'm just like, yo, like, I feel like. Like my show is good. Like, even you was telling me, like, your show comes from a different perspective. Perspective. You're not afraid to talk about things. Like, I feel like, like we. I talk about a lot of different things within our community, but, you know, obviously I make it fun. Put the medicine and candy. But I'm like, damn. Like, I feel like I should be further ahead, but I'm like, it just feels like I need to be on a handstand popping my and shaking my ass because I see other people. And I know comparison is a thief of joy. And I'm not comparing myself to anybody because, you know, I work really hard. But I'm just like, damn, like, what do I gotta do to get to the next level? Like, I feel like I should be having all these opportunities. And I just feel like sometimes I get breadcrumbs. And I'm like, yo, it's not fair.

[DL Whisperer]

Yeah. And that's. And that's why I always tell people, like, I try to fight for women because patriarchy likes. Like, it's so many things that especially black women are. It is so many layers that you have to go through. And like you said, you should be further. And you've been doing this. So, like, I. When I was watching your videos, I was asking myself why you weren't further either. But I already knew the answer. Because if you just even compare to the white woman that came out of nowhere, that I don't have to say her name, what the fuck is she doing? But guess what? She's more palatable for media. Because, like, I always tell people, if you look at media, media controls culture and society. So they want certain things. So by you being so classy and essentially, they only want one Tamron Hall. They only want one Tamron Hall. Like, you see, Jennifer Hudson couldn't be Tamara. She had to be. Jennifer Hudson acts so ditzy on her show that I don't like it because, I mean, I always be laughing, but I'm like, this is not Jennifer Hudson. Like, they dumbed her down so much for that show.

[Ebony]

That's what I said as well, because I'm like, I think Jennifer can. She gotta be a little bit more quicker than this. Like, she is.

[DL Whisperer]

We've heard her interviews. That's not Jennifer Hudson. That's why I was like, literally. But she's working for a company, so, you know, she gotta do what she gotta do.

[Ebony]

Right? Right. Ciao. Have you ever met a Download man who regret the way he was living his life?

[DL Whisperer]

A lot of them always say they regret it. Like, I think a lot of them feel shame at some point or another. Why they disassociate from the actions because they know that it's. They know they're just wrong. They know. That's why even all of the men that I've ever exposed, like, they never be mad at me. They always say, like, I understand. Because they know, like, you put me through a lot.

[Ebony]

Yeah.

[DL Whisperer]

Not like, that's not an easy life. That's why we say, like. And for me to willingly be in it is crazy. That's why I say, like, women unwillingly be in it and it take you to such a low place in life. So that's why I thought, like, okay, I can help people avoid this because by me being from a small town and dating after I turned 18, because this will always tell people, they always, like, well, I was messing with Download Me in high school. You were fast. You were grown. I didn't start dating until I got to college.

[Ebony]

Me too.

[DL Whisperer]

So it's like, I Started. That's why people be like, you're too grown for this. And it's like, well, I only been dating for a few years, technically.

[Ebony]

Right, Right.

[DL Whisperer]

So it's like, I'm still new to dating. So I had to figure out. And I saw somebody that was probably telling me what I'm telling people in a real way and showing I probably would have just never even had to figure out all of those things from DL man or, you know, learned that. But I am glad that I had some of those experiences because DL men are everywhere. Like, when I was in college, the dean of students, I met the dean of students, getting into it with a girl about a DL man. And the dean of students is a DL man, which worked in my favor because he understood what was going on. Because I was up against some sexual harassment. I was up against some charges, like criminal charges, because this girl had thought I was her man, but really she was my man. So then she. It was snowball effect. But luckily. And I didn't want to expose the dude. But of course, once police get involved, you're coming out of the closet.

[Ebony]

Yeah. Because I'm not. I'm not going down for you.

[DL Whisperer]

That's what we gonna draw the line. So that's when I started telling the truth. And I'm like, do I need to get the receipts? But he was the ill. So he understood why I hadn't, you know, told a girl the truth and how this situation got where it got. Because I would never tell the girl the truth. Like, we had had sit downs. I essentially just told her I didn't know her man, he wasn't her man. Like, he was her old man, my man. So it's like, he technically was your man, but he not your man no more. So I didn't think I really owed her that. Even though in reality, I'm like, had I just went ahead and told her the truth, it probably would have made the situation better. But then, even when she found out the truth, she told all of these other. Other people.

[Ebony]

So, yeah, that's not cool.

[DL Whisperer]

Yeah. So I was like, sometimes, anytime I've ever been with a deal man, and I found out he had a woman, I always go to the woman. But there has yet to be a woman that was receptive and that didn't turn it into drama trying to fight or, you know, trying to beef about a man that, like, I always tell women, if he wants me, you, there's no competition. Just, like, if he wants you, I don't see no competition. Like, there they can't be. You're a woman. He's like pin us against each other. Because they'll do that with two women too. They don't care. They just don't want them to be in the wrong. They want to take all of the attention off them and have people arguing and beefing because that makes them feel good.

[Ebony]

Yeah. How many men would you say that you've been with have been on a down low?

[DL Whisperer]

Oh, and let me clarify something. When I say date, that does not mean folks.

[Ebony]

Right.

[DL Whisperer]

People can't like. And I, and I gotta say that because a lot of people when they hear that you dated a lot of.

[Ebony]

Men, they're automatically think you a hoe. Right.

[DL Whisperer]

So because I, I did used to be a sugar baby. So I am going to include at least like 200 like on dates. Personal. Still have phone numbers. Some, some of them are in the industry. That's why I say like in Atlanta. I wasn't playing some things people don't catch on my page. But I have this video a woman got on crop like her ex husband was like first sugar daddy when I got there and I was you know, getting into college. And so that's why I always say like it's, it's so many people that you just would never expect.

[Ebony]

Wow, child, you about to have me. Like these cookies are for good, baby.

[DL Whisperer]

I mean but Atlanta is a hot spot for gay.

[Ebony]

I mean. Yeah, but still so.

[DL Whisperer]

But I do agree like women. Because a lot of these men, especially now that there's trans women too, they're gonna play semantics with that. Now you ask a man, you ever been with me? No, because he's. He technically is gonna say no because he's only into trans women or he's only dealing with trans women. So semantics.

[Ebony]

Yeah. Are you ever afraid like because of the work that you're doing? I mean because you're popping. You got a large following. You know, topic that people feel comfortable. Yeah. So like you know, and then you, you cute, you young, you know, you building a life for yourself. So are you ever afraid for your safety?

[DL Whisperer]

Well, I guess because I mean somebody already tried to take my life. But in, in general I will say this. Any that's that ever tried me that got his ass to beat the only, the only way and notice because I'm not no little like I'm six foot four. Very like I'll beat the out of you. So the only way they're gonna if a shoot me. But even when it comes to shooting, they can't even Shoot, like I didn't have to pull out a gun too. Like, that's what I always feel like people don't realize that if you think I'm gonna lay down and let you do something to me, you're crazy.

[Ebony]

Right.

[DL Whisperer]

And I typically live in gated communities like my, my home, they, they can't use. So, you know, I like, I always tell people, unless you're gonna do something at the airport, unless you're gonna do something, you won't catch me in a club, you're not gonna catch me at too many spaces that, you know, I just feel, you know, so I'm like, I really don't be worried. And if somebody does something to me behind this information, then that might have just been my destiny. That's all about it. I mean, I feel like if. Because I'm spiritual, so I feel like if I've been protected all of this time, all of this while, throughout my whole life, because a lot of has happened to me in my life, like the DL go all the way back to childhood. So I feel like if I've been protected this long is for a reason.

[Ebony]

Reason. Yeah. Yeah. Listen, I told you, you're doing God's work, baby.

[DL Whisperer]

Yeah. So that's why. And that's why I be feeling like I'm doing because I'm happy about it too. Like I. I like helping people, I like educating people. And I'm like, this topic is so important because a lot of people either a don't know much and women don't be suspecting it.

[Ebony]

Yeah.

[DL Whisperer]

People always like, well, you think every man is there and I'm sorry to cut you off, but I just want. I don't think every man is deal. But what people have to realize, a lot of these men are terrible people. That's why I was like with my process. Even if your man is not deal by everything that I tell you, if he does all of the. That I say he's the horrible person. So he's acting like these Leo man. So you shouldn't be with him regardless. Because if he's acting like them, you probably don't.

[Ebony]

Yeah, no, that's a fact. That's a fact. So let's talk about some behavioral patterns and personality traits. What are some personality traits that you observe in Download? Men.

[DL Whisperer]

Okay, so first, narcissism, which again, let me, let me clarify because I mean, a lot of men are narcissistic. So like I always tell women every DL man is a narcissist, but not all narcissist. Men are deal. Because to me, I mean, there's a lot of men that are narcissistic, but right after that they have to be misogynistic. And like I always tell women, gay men, trans, like, misogyny, even some women have internalized it. So, you know, misogyny, you know, when you can tell when a man hates women, he's gonna always put them down. He's never gonna have anything good. Going to make hasty generalizations. Women don't want nothing but money from men or all women ain't. Or you. You know, those type of men. And then impulsivity, those are the top three. Because the impulses, that's what get them in trouble. A lot of DL, man, they'll not act on their impulses for time periods, but they always have that time where they slip and got to go. Either sleep with a man or a trans woman, or you're at a bath house or you're doing something salacious and it might be eight months before you do something else. But those impulses always come back and they can't control, like, control his impulses. Because being impulsive, that gets literally that the word in itself, like the definition of impulsive. So, you know, that's the big problem because they're so indecisive. And again, when they want something, a man usually are just sexual creatures. So I always say men pick all of their friends, everything. Most men do everything based off of attraction. So I put them in the right circumstances and they'll go, yeah.

[Ebony]

And then when it comes to behavioral patterns, I thought you, you was on point with this. Because I agree anger is a reflection of self hate. If A is always angry, something ain't right.

[DL Whisperer]

Right. Or he want that princess treatment, or he's angry because you not treating him like. Or you know, because I always say, like, no straight man is going to sit around and want a woman to take care of him. No, no, he's not gonna be mad that you won't send him money for lunch and. Right. So that's why I always say, like some of these personalities, like that should be obvious. But the, the narcissist, the impulsivity and the misogyny. Because when you put all of those things together again, that helps make a deal, man. Because if you hate women, you can't control your impulses and you think that the world falls around you and that you're invincible. What. What is going to hold you back from doing whatever you want?

[Ebony]

Ciao. This concludes part one of this week's episode. And y' all. Part two is really where we get into some things so please make sure you subscribe to the show so you don't miss it it. And also if you think this episode would resonate with someone, please send it their way. Okay? Spread Love is the Brooklyn way and if you have any comments, questions or concerns or you want to say hey girl, hey, shoot me an email at hello@the PSG podcast.com yeah, I really really hope you enjoyed this week's episode and I cannot wait for you all to hear part two. So until next time everyone, later. Foreign is a production of the Black Effect Podcast Network. For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. Don't forget to subscribe and rate the show and you can connect with me on social media at Pretty Private Podcast this is an iHeart podcast.