Crash Comedy Jam

Summary

The Brilliant Idiots – “Crash Comedy Jam”

Release Date: May 15, 2026
Hosts: Charlamagne Tha God and Andrew Schulz

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Episode Overview

This week’s episode of The Brilliant Idiots is a wild, insightful ride through the current landscape of comedy and culture, with Charlamagne Tha God and Andrew Schulz unpacking the uproar and boundaries of roast comedy (especially the Netflix “Roast of Kevin Hart”), the persistent dance between art and offense, and riffs on everything from COVID paranoia, viral morality, dating economics, to the madness of American politics. Expect the usual blend of irreverence and real talk, as they challenge each other on what’s fair game for comedy, celebrity roast ethics, and the ever-evolving sensitivities of society.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Hantavirus, COVID, and Lockdown Paranoia

• Context: Early on, Andrew and Charlamagne joke about the possible return of lockdowns due to a new “Hantavirus” panic, riffing on COVID comparisons and the American tendency toward fear-mongering or government overreach.
• Charlamagne on pandemic panic:
  “You know one thing—X-Files told us in 1998 that we were all gonna die of Hanta virus” (04:00)
• Riffs on New York’s resilience:
  Andrew: “If the shit is caused by rats, how come New York hasn’t ever had an outbreak? We’re part rat.” (02:51)
• Reference to government power:
  Charlamagne: “FEMA allows the White House to suspend constitutional government upon declaration of a national emergency. What is an agency with such broad sweeping power doing managing a small viral outbreak in suburban Texas?” (04:38)
• Recurring theme: Public distrust in how authorities might use emergencies, with comedic exaggeration but a hint of real skepticism.

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2. Roast of Kevin Hart: The Limits (and Purpose) of Roast Comedy

Timestamps: Main discussion 09:31 – 41:11

a. Defending “Offensive” Comedy

• Art vs. Offense: Charlamagne: “People have the right to laugh. People also have the right to be offended. It’s art—you got the right to react however you want.” (09:55) Andrew: “You can’t believe in freedom of speech and then be like, you’re not allowed to speak badly against the art you just watched.” (10:24)
• What makes dark humor work?
  • “Tragedy plus time equals comedy” discussed as a classic comedic rule (11:49).
  • Timing, mutual understanding, and the setting of a roast distinguish it from random, unsolicited offense on social media.

b. Jokes About Tragic Deaths: Where’s the Line?

• Charlamagne’s discomfort:
  “I just don’t understand the joking about death, especially violent, tragic deaths. What’s funny about that?” (10:29)
• Andrew’s counterpoint:
  “Sometimes it’s very funny… It’s on the comedian to make it funny.” (18:31)
• Specific Examples:
  • Jokes about George Floyd, Charlie Kirk, Pete Davidson’s father, and others referenced as controversial, especially when the individual or their family are not participating.
  • “I just don’t like making jokes about violent, tragic deaths that are so fresh.” (21:20)

c. “Roast Rules” & Setting Boundaries

• Rules for Roast Jokes:
  Andrew: “I don’t touch the kids… I don’t talk about wives unless they’re public figures.” (14:12)
  • Some off-limit topics are unwritten agreements among comics.
• Consent and mutual awareness:
  Charlamagne: “If you’re part of the roast, you know what the rules are. Everything is fair game.” (15:21)
• Using the non-participants:
  Charlamagne: “The Floyd family’s not a part of the roast. The Kirk family’s not a part of the roast, and the joke ends up being about them.” (20:57)

d. Why People Get So Mad (Social Media vs. In-Person)

• Offense is magnified when people stumble on roast clips out of context versus preparing to be “roasted” as part of the intended audience.

e. Self-Deprecation, Therapy, and Trauma

• Side conversation on trauma and molestation jokes, with Charlamagne clarifying his boundaries and why certain topics hit different.
• Debate about “what’s different” when it happens to you vs. others (22:19).

f. Roast Lineup, Race Jokes, and Platforming

• Questions over why the “Roast of Kevin Hart” didn’t feature more of Kev’s actual contemporaries. (37:16)
• Observations on the racial dynamics within roasts: “There’s probably way more black jokes and there’s more black people on the dais, so there’s way more racial jokes because of it… and so much of a roast is visually what you can see.” (31:19)
• On Tony Hinchcliffe:
  Charlamagne: “Objectively, I enjoyed it up until that last part because I was like, why? Come on, bro.” (34:26)

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3. Celebrity Roasting—Who’s Next?

“I don’t know how many more of these GOAT roasts y’all gonna get, to be honest.” (41:58)

• Fantasies about who’d make a good roast subject: Tiger Woods, Michael Jordan, Drake.
  Charlamagne: “He would never. But if you did Tiger Woods… phenomenal.” (42:07)
• The challenge: As celebrities get more successful, fewer want to sit through two hours of being roasted by strangers (41:47).

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4. Media, Online Narratives, and “Coordinated Campaigns”

Timestamps: 47:16 – 49:54

• Reflection on how negative press against Kevin Hart coincided with the day of the roast – “coordinated campaigns” by media.
• “Notice how all the blogs are posting the same story the day of the roast about Kev’s company doing bad…” (47:35)
• The concept of bots and manipulation in online public opinion.

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5. Datings, Economics, and Creativity in Relationships

Timestamps: 57:10 – 66:43

• Falling dating rates due to economic concerns; creativity in dating has vanished. Charlamagne: “What happened to creativity?” (63:23)
• Heated debate on whether picnics/cheap dates are romantic or just “homeless behavior.” Andrew: “That’s the gayest shit I ever heard in my entire life. You show up with a wicker basket… no girl is sitting on the ground with you.” (59:42)
• Social commentary: How the standards and expectations of women drive male behavior, and vice versa. Andrew: “Women dictate society. Men gravitate towards the things that women want. If women are upset with society, change it.” (63:49)
• Fun with magic tricks: Series of jokes and bits showing off “relationship magic,” both literal and figurative.

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6. Political Madness: GOP, Trump, and the Future of Democracy

Timestamps: 69:56 – 82:43

• Charlamagne previews his “Daily Show” take:
  “I’m essentially telling the GOP, let us know in 2028. Is it gonna be a Democrat vs a Republican or a Democrat vs a King? Stop pussyfooting.” (70:11)
• Discussions on the constitutionality of Trump running for a third term, “offensive gameplans,” and dismay at party officials’ cowardice. “Just say it’s unconstitutional—’cause it is.” (73:24) Andrew: “How can you be a judge if you’re not even gonna honor the Constitution?” (77:40)
• Highlighting cases of voter disenfranchisement, e.g. Louisiana’s removal of an elected official’s position post-election as an example of how democracy can be undermined (79:15).

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7. Pandemic Lockdown Redux & Mental Health

Timestamps: 83:45 – 87:56

• Would America benefit from another lockdown? Taylor: “Yeah, calm shit down. It's too much.” (83:50) Charlamagne: “No, we do not need that right now. The economy is already in the toilet… There's more people mentally ill and dealing with mental health issues now than during COVID.” (87:02)
• Real talk about the economic and social damage of shutdowns; more empathy for struggles with mental health and financial desperation.

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8. Lightning Round: Last Meals, PB&Js, & Going Out Your Way

Timestamps: 88:08 – 91:56

• Fun hypothetical: If you’re allergic to peanuts and on death row, would you choose a PB&J to “go out on your own terms”? Charlamagne: “Just give me, like, three Uncrustables… Let me die a happy man.” (88:37)
• Hilarious escalation imagining “PB&J” as “penis blow job.” Andrew: “What if you asked for a PB&J but just some guy came in, ‘I’m here for the penis blow job…’” (90:03)
• Ethical (lol) debate: last meal versus last blowjob – which would you choose?

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On artistic freedom:
  Charlamagne: “People have the right to laugh. People also have the right to be offended.” (09:55)
• Andrew’s analogy for roast settings:
  “When you agree to play football, you could get hit in a way that completely changes you.” (13:08)
• Joke about Asian orthodontics:
  Andrew: “Asian teeth were crazy. It looked like the Game of Thrones chair” (07:06)
• On the evolving offense economy:
  Charlamagne: “Def is just something we can’t come back from, that’s all. And by the way, the violence, the violentness of those deaths, yo, just…” (34:50)
• On dating and creativity:
  Andrew: “Women dictate society. Men gravitate towards the things that women want. If women are upset with society, change it.” (63:49)
• On political cowardice:
  Andrew: “How can you be a judge if you’re not even gonna honor the Constitution?” (77:40)

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Timestamps for Major Segments

• Hantavirus & Pandemic Paranoia: 01:23–06:31
• Roast Comedy, Limits & Ethics: 09:31–41:11
  • When is it okay to joke about death? 10:29–23:43
  • Discussion of specific roast moments (Kevin Hart’s roast, Tony Hinchcliffe, etc.): 31:19–37:00
• Celebrity Roasting—Who’s Next?: 41:58–46:43
• Media, Bots, and Online Smear Campaigns: 47:16–49:54
• Church Announcements & IVF Charity: 51:50–56:09
• Modern Dating & Relationship Creativity: 57:10–66:43
• Political Chaos: Trump, GOP, Democratic Erosion: 69:56–82:43
• Lockdowns, Mental Health, and Social Fallout: 83:45–87:56
• PB&J Death Row Hypotheticals: 88:08–91:56

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Final Thoughts

“Crash Comedy Jam” is a quintessential Brilliant Idiots episode: high-energy banter and probing debate about the responsibilities and risks of comedy (especially in the context of race and tragedy), the social rules around offense, and the unpredictable currents of American politics and culture. Charlamagne and Schulz push each other to clarify their personal boundaries and their societal critiques, weaving in hilariously inappropriate tangents and moments of unexpected sincerity. Listeners come away reflecting on where society draws its lines—and who gets to redraw them.

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Transcript

[Andrew Schulz]

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[Mom (storyteller)]

Sure. Once upon a time, a mom needed a new car.

[Taylor]

Was she brave?

[Mom (storyteller)]

She was tired mostly. But she went to Carvana.com and found a great car at a great price. No secret treasure map required.

[Andrew Schulz]

Did you have to find a dr?

[Taylor]

Nope.

[Mom (storyteller)]

She bought it 100% online from her bed, actually.

[Andrew Schulz]

Was it scary?

[Mom (storyteller)]

Honey, it was as unscary as car buying could be.

[Taylor]

Did the car have a sunroof?

[Mom (storyteller)]

It did actually. Okay, good story. Car buying you'll want to tell stories about. Buy your car today on Carvana. Delivery fees may apply.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yep. Charlamagne tha guy.

[Andrew Schulz]

Andrew Schull.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

We are the Brilliant Idiots podcast. Back for another week of brilliant idiotness. And this week's episode is brought to you by.

[Andrew Schulz]

Hunter. Hunter.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Hunter. Hunter. No.

[Andrew Schulz]

Hunter. Hunter. Hunter.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Hunter. Not Hunter. What?

[Andrew Schulz]

It's not.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

No.

[Andrew Schulz]

Guys, we're going to get a nice little break. They're going to have us locked up for six months.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Nah.

[Andrew Schulz]

No, we're going to get a nice little break. Hunter. Hunter. Hunter. Hunter.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Hezekiah Walker. What's up? My friend Hanter is not going to put us on lockdown. Not this. You think this administration is going to put us on lockdown? Get the fuck out of here.

[Andrew Schulz]

Nah, they're not locking it. No. What are you talking about? They would love nothing more. I think they shut down. Didn't they shut down the lockdown people? What is that even called?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

That's what I'm saying This like they didn't do a federal lockdown when it was Covid. And it'll probably be a State by state thing, but like they not. Like it's not going to be a federal lockdown.

[Andrew Schulz]

What am I referencing in that Hunter? Hunter?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Biden, Biden, Biden, Biden, Biden, Biden. Yeah, that Hanta shit is interesting. Should we be concerned? You said that about COVID Was I right, though? Ultimately I was right to a certain extent. But this one has a 40% mortality rate.

[Andrew Schulz]

What did Covid have?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

0.8.

[Andrew Schulz]

And we shut the world down.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You see what I'm saying? 0.8%. 4.8. This shit got a 40% mortality rate.

[Andrew Schulz]

I gotta see 40% of the people on that ship die to believe it, man. I gotta see 40. Cause it seems like 40% of the people didn't die on that ship.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

If the shit is caused by rats, how come New York hasn't ever had an outbreak of the hunting? Y' all are the home of the biggest rats on the planet.

[Andrew Schulz]

But we're part rat.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You know what New York is a part, right? That might be true. You live creatures.

[Andrew Schulz]

We literally travel through the city on subway.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Subways, underground.

[Andrew Schulz]

Like rats travel through the street. We only come up when we need to come up.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

That's true.

[Andrew Schulz]

We stay inside buildings all day like rats. We're not outside creatures.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

That's true.

[Andrew Schulz]

We can handle the elements. I don't think anybody died of COVID in New York.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Nah, nah. Mad people died of COVID in New York for sure.

[Andrew Schulz]

Y' all know one?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yes, I do. Who? Fred, the godson. God bless the dead. I mean, I know more, but the one that comes to my mind is Fred the godson.

[Andrew Schulz]

Rip. Fred the godson. Were there pre existing conditions involved?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I don't think so. I just remember he was in rip, man.

[Andrew Schulz]

Rip. Outside of Fred, I don't think anybody passed.

[Taylor]

My aunt died of it.

[Andrew Schulz]

But where's your aunt from?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Philly. Philly.

[Andrew Schulz]

That's a different. You're not from New York, Taylor, obviously.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Rp, pay attention to just in general.

[Taylor]

Who cares if it's two hours away?

[Andrew Schulz]

Y' all need more rats.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You don't have enough rats. New York had Master Splinter and none of the Ninja Turtles got it. Yeah, I do know one thing. The X Files told us in 1998 that we were all gonna die of Hana virus.

[Andrew Schulz]

I walked in here, Charlamagne's playing a

[Charlamagne Tha God]

video for Chris because that shit cannot be that much of a coincidence.

[Andrew Schulz]

From the X Files.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

The X Files?

[Andrew Schulz]

Twenty years ago, most political journalists in the United States of America. He's referencing the X Files once again for a prediction on how the world is gonna end once again.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

What you just said is another problem with America.

[Andrew Schulz]

Which is why am I a former political.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Listen. You know. Did you hear this? No. Are you familiar with the antivirus agent?

[Andrew Schulz]

Yeah.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

It was a deadly virus spread by field mice in the southwestern United States several years ago.

[Andrew Schulz]

Yes, in the newspaper.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

FEMA was called out to manage an outbreak of the hantavirus hunter. Are you familiar with what the Federal Emergency Management Agency's real power is? FEMA allows the White House to suspend constitutional government upon declaration of a national emergency. Think about that. What is an agency with such broad sweeping power doing managing a small viral outbreak in suburban Texas?

[Andrew Schulz]

Man. It was such a small outbreak. Stop worrying about all this. Stop worrying about all this stuff. Everything's gonna be fine.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

What was it? Sounds like you're getting scared.

[Andrew Schulz]

Everything's gonna be just fine. Dude. I know New York's gonna be fine.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

He said if you want to kill a large group of people, let the Hannah free.

[Andrew Schulz]

Let me just.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

That was the X files 20 years ago.

[Andrew Schulz]

Let me just tell you guys something. This shit would happen when the Knicks are about to win a champion.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I think about that all the time.

[Andrew Schulz]

This shit would happen when the Knicks are cruising through the playoffs.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I think about that all the time. Not the fact that the Knicks are winning the championship. But when you're finally getting everything you want in life.

[Andrew Schulz]

The hunter.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Here we go again with this shit, man.

[Andrew Schulz]

Do you have something in that $200 million contract that says that there's a deadly global pandemic? They don't got to pay you?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I don't know what you're talking about. But I will say one thing that I've learned about life is all contracts should be guaranteed. Okay. That is one thing that I've learned about life.

[Andrew Schulz]

No, but there's a specific term in contracts. It's like a French term. Force majeure. Force majeure.

[Guest or Producer]

Force majeure is a real term.

[Andrew Schulz]

But force major is a real term. So a global pandemic could cut that shit out. And I'm sorry, man.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Nah. Nobody.

[Andrew Schulz]

No. I don't think yours should be shut down.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yeah, but. No. I don't know. I don't know what we're talking about right now. But I do know that Hannah virus. I think we should just be concerned. I'm seeing the Asians back out with the mask, bro.

[Andrew Schulz]

Yep.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You know what I'm saying? Chris, Be honest. They haven't been wearing the mask in a minute.

[Andrew Schulz]

I haven't seen an Asian in a mask.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You haven't seen a mask in a minute. But now they back out. The N95s are back out.

[Andrew Schulz]

Yo, can I tell you another thing that I want to say?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

See, look at Chris.

[Andrew Schulz]

Oh, fuck. Chris.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Wife made him leave. Don't leave the fucking house without the mask.

[Andrew Schulz]

Chris, can I ask you a. Because pre mask, Asian teeth were crazy.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Did they all get, like, the fuck up?

[Andrew Schulz]

The braces are. Asian teeth have been perfect since the pandemic.

[Guest or Producer]

Now you're thinking of England.

[Andrew Schulz]

No, English people don't have teeth. That's my family. I know. My family. You don't have to explain to me about my family. I know. Okay. What I'm saying is Asian teeth were crazy. All different directions, like you didn't even know what was going on. It looked like the Game of Thrones chair.

[Guest or Producer]

No, I think Asian teeth have been good.

[Andrew Schulz]

Post pandemic.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

No, immaculate.

[Andrew Schulz]

Yeah, immaculate pre pandemic crazy.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Really? I never noticed. I never. I never paid attention.

[Andrew Schulz]

It looked like the French fries coming out the McDonald's box. And then. And then.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

How do you even see? They don't open their mouths that wide.

[Andrew Schulz]

Oh, come on, bro. They don't. You never been to, like, a little dim sum spot?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

They don't. Every time they laugh like, it's like ventriloquist almost.

[Andrew Schulz]

Yeah. But they got to cover it up because it was the friend. It was small fries. Small fries every time. But now perfect. So something happened during COVID where they all got perfect teeth. I haven't seen an Asian person without perfect teeth.

[Guest or Producer]

Most of the time, I guess. I don't say again. Maybe they were all using the time

[Andrew Schulz]

to go to salute.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You got to make you salute, bro.

[Andrew Schulz]

Y' all get it.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Don't waste your time. Make. Use your time wisely.

[Andrew Schulz]

Hey, Great Britain, you gotta follow the Asians, bro.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I don't know, bro. I don't know.

[Guest or Producer]

Why do British people historically have bad teeth?

[Andrew Schulz]

It gotta be the T or something. Also inbreeding.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Inbreeding. Oh, that might be a thing. Because hillbillies be having fucked up teeth, too. That might be a thing.

[Andrew Schulz]

You gotta control power. You gotta keep the power centralized. You heard about the Habsburg jaw in Europe, right? The Habsburg dynasty?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

If you hadn't said jaw, you.

[Guest or Producer]

There's real. There's real information in history being shared here.

[Andrew Schulz]

No, this is actually really.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

That shit sounds crazy.

[Andrew Schulz]

So the. The. The haps.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Perhaps I put this bridge on, you know what I'm saying?

[Andrew Schulz]

You still fucked it up, and you were so close. You still fucked it up, and you were so close. No, the Habsburg does. Like, the Habsburg dynasty. They had basically, like, all the different kings and rulers in Europe came from this one family, the Habsburgs. And in order to, like, maintain and control power, they would just marry cousins with one another. And then they supposedly started to develop this thing called the Habsburg jaw. And you can see these old paintings of them, and they were fucking gnarly looking. That's the. The specific one, right?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Jay Leno's a Habsburg, Sean. What guy? That's. He's got. He's got to be a descendant of

[Andrew Schulz]

the Habsburg J. Royalty, bro.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

No, he is.

[Andrew Schulz]

You're not just TV royalty. Hey, hey, Mama. Yeah, we. Yeah, tell. Tell her do, by the way. Tell her to do. Put that up, my son. You going live.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Talk to you like that? Lopi. Good?

[Andrew Schulz]

Yeah. Everything fine?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yeah. Big P, shout out to Big P, man. Big P in the building. Did you send. Did you see the roast?

[Andrew Schulz]

I. I've seen sections of the roast, so I've seen clips, and I've seen a few different sections.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Your perspective is probably different. You've done a roast before.

[Andrew Schulz]

I have done. I have done it. Yeah.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Did they. They roasted you and you was on stage, too, right?

[Andrew Schulz]

Yeah, Yeah, a little bit.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Okay. Okay. A little bit. I. Overall, I enjoyed the roast.

[Andrew Schulz]

Okay.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

But I think that one thing that we always have to remember about all of these situations is people have the right to laugh. People also have the right to be offended. Like, the things.

[Andrew Schulz]

Everybody has the right to do whatever they want.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

The things that. It's art, right? So when you put art out into

[Andrew Schulz]

the world, you got the right to

[Charlamagne Tha God]

react to whatever you want, however you want. And, you know, I think it's also very important to understand that, you know, what you find funny or what is a joke to you is also some people's trigger.

[Andrew Schulz]

Yeah. Like, you can't believe in freedom of speech and then be like, you're not allowed to speak badly against, you know, the art that you just watched.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

No, no. And listen, I'm. I'm cool with. I like dark humor. Right. But what I just don't understand the joking of. About death, especially violent, tragic deaths. I don't understand that. What. What's. What's funny about that?

[Andrew Schulz]

Well, well. And, well, sometimes it's very funny.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

It depends. Right? Like, yeah, if you're joking on historical stuff, right. Like, something that happened.

[Andrew Schulz]

Let me tell you, 80 years ago. An example, Pearl harbor. Right?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Okay.

[Andrew Schulz]

When they. The Japanese flew those planes into Pearl Harbor.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Okay.

[Andrew Schulz]

Right. Now, a lot of people assumed it was a kamikaze Mission. I think that they were actually trying to land.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Okay. The reason that joke. I'm gonna tell you why that. But I'm gonna tell you why that's actually a joke.

[Andrew Schulz]

Why is it a jo. A joke.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

It's a joke that actually lands and it lands.

[Andrew Schulz]

See what you.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I see what you did there. Oh, no.

[Andrew Schulz]

It lands because why?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Number one, it's old. I'm sure there are people that'll be offended, but there's nobody. I don't think there's anybody left to be offended.

[Andrew Schulz]

I mean, somebody.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

That's what I'm saying.

[Taylor]

How.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

How long ago was that?

[Andrew Schulz]

Somebody's grandpa found out there was no landing gear.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You see? But you're not naming a specific person. You're not individualizing it.

[Andrew Schulz]

Well, look, like, I don't even think you need. I don't think you need.

[Guest or Producer]

What's the saying? Tragedy plus time equals comedy.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Tragedy plus time equals comedy. Again.

[Andrew Schulz]

Again. I don't even think you need to explain the circumstance for, like, if you felt away about something, that's totally fine.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yes.

[Andrew Schulz]

And then what I would say about the rose specifically is like, I think. I think what has happened is, like, it's populated social media, so a lot of people are just scrolling and they're looking at, you know, random stuff on their feed. They're looking at a funny cat video, a stupid AI Slob video, something else, and all of a sudden, the most racist joke ever pops up on your feed. When you. When you subscribe to the roast, like, when you go, I'm gonna watch the roast, and you understand, like, what a roast is, Your brain is conforming to the standards of the roast a little more. So I would imagine people who are like, I'm gonna turn this on, and I'm gonna hear the darkest jokes ever about everybody, and everybody has equal ground, and everybody's gonna be able to say whatever they want. I imagine, like, you're a little bit more prepared to be offended than when you're just randomly scrolling something and you see, like, you know, really crazy offensive.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

The sexist jokes, the racist jokes. Like, you can debate that all day. I just don't understand why people want to joke on somebody's dead relative. I don't care if it's George, Floyd, Charlie Kirk, Cheryl Underwood's husband, who committed suicide, Pete Davidson's dad, who died in 9 11.

[Andrew Schulz]

Why you're allowed to think that like that. The way Mark put this best, I think on flagrant, it's like, there's an ex. There's a different expectation for Jokes, depending the scenario you're in. So if you're at work, not like this kind of job, but if you're at a regular job, and this is Mark's point, so I want to give him credit for it, but it's like, you don't expect to hear fucked up jokes. Maybe some little, like, water cooler talk, but nothing that crazy is going to make people feel uncomfortable. And if somebody does bust a kind of crazy joke, it's either that much more hilarious or that much more offensive, given the setting that you're in a roast is a very specific thing where, like, everybody goes, hey, the most vile, offensive, heinous things are going to be said right here. And that is what most people assume going into it. Definitely everybody on the panel knew that that's possible, that they could say those things. So, like, even though their feelings might have been hurt, they knew going into the game. It's like when you agree to play, like, you know, football, it's like you could get hit. You could get hit in a way that completely changes you.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

But there's got to be some parameters, right? I'm sure there's people up there who had things like, I want to.

[Andrew Schulz]

So my rules. My rules are, like with Brady, I don't touch. I don't. I don't touch the kids. No, I don't fuck with the kids at all because, like, they didn't ask to be part of this. And I don't talk about wives unless they have chosen to be public figures. So, like, that's. And that was.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

It was actually the roasted Giselle, though.

[Andrew Schulz]

Yeah, but she's a public figure. Like. She is.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

She was pissed. She hated this shit.

[Andrew Schulz]

Should have stayed married. I don't know what to tell you. Should have cheated on your man with a fucking karate instructor. You know what I mean? Like, there's ways to get around it.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yeah. But by the way, to me, that's fair game. And here's the thing. I just. I just don't understand why people want to joke on death. Because I come from the era of. Even if you was making your mama jokes or your daddy jokes, it's one of the person be like, man, my mom and dad. Oh, you'd be like, oh, my bad. Like, you knew that's where you stopped.

[Andrew Schulz]

Would you stop there?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yes. Now you gotta fight. Unless you wanna. By the way, I don't have to stop there, but if you keep going, you gotta be ready to throw hands if I trigger this person enough. Yo, this motherfucker told me that his mama Dead or his daddy dead. He was making jokes.

[Andrew Schulz]

Has anybody on the roast said that they were offended by jokes? Or is it people that are watching the roast? They're saying.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

But that's my point. Like you said, if you're part of the roast, you know what the rules are. Everything is fair game. We've heard Pete Davidson made jokes about his father dying in 9 11.

[Andrew Schulz]

Exactly.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yeah. I'm sure Cheryl Underwood has probably made jokes about her husband, you know, committing suicide. Kevin Hart's, you know, father died. People were making jokes about him. I thought Regina Hall. I actually thought Regina Hall's jokes, where she was acting like she was channeling Kevin Hart's dead mom crazy, was hilarious. Funny about that. To me, one of the funniest jokes of the night, when she was talking about how Kevin's mom, God bless the dead, was having sex with Michael Clark Duncan in heaven, you know, she was like, yes, they run trains in heaven. And then she's like, oh, not that heaven. Cause his daughter's name is heaven. You see what I'm saying? Wow.

[Andrew Schulz]

I didn't catch it. That's my point.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

But that's one of them double entendres. I find that funny. But, man, I don't find anything funny about a violent, tragic death. I am somebody getting choked up by the police, somebody getting shot in the neck. Once again, I don't even like the Pete and Cheryl shit, but they're part

[Andrew Schulz]

of the roast, and I'm sure George,

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Floyd, and Charlie Kirk had nothing to do with this roast.

[Andrew Schulz]

I'm sure if they said to the other comedians, they're like, hey, this is a really sensitive topic for me. Can you guys not talk about it? I. I can almost guarantee that all the other comedians there would be like, dude, I don't even care that much about that thing that happened to you. Like, if you don't want to do that, then we won't do it. So usually, I mean, that was the thing about the Tom thing. The thing about the Tom thing was, like, don't talk about his kids. And then there was one moment when Jeff Ross made a joke about Bob Kraft.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Oh.

[Andrew Schulz]

Until I got mad, and Tom walked up to him during the roast and said, hey, man, keep his name out of your mouth, or something like that.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

And, like, for real? For real.

[Andrew Schulz]

Yeah.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yeah. Wow.

[Andrew Schulz]

It was kind of funny that we made a bunch of Gisele jokes, and he was like, yo, keep that shit coming.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

There's a statement going on online. I don't know if it's true from Tom Brady, you seen that statement? Is that real?

[Andrew Schulz]

Yes, probably. I hope so. Sometimes you just want to be real.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Oh, you know what I'm talking about.

[Andrew Schulz]

Yeah. It's like, I can't believe you let people talk about your ex wife is like 25 million. If somebody paid you 20 million to make fun of your ex wife who cheated on you with a Brazilian jiu jitsu instructor, you would take it, too, or something like that.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

If I could find this shit. This shit is so funny.

[Andrew Schulz]

I mean, the way you look at it is like this. Like, when you see people fighting in the ufc, it's some crazy shit. You see somebody, like, elbowing an unconscious guy in the face and just splitting his forehead, blood dripping everywhere. But you go into that event going, I'm going to see some crazy stuff. It doesn't mean that you can't still see it and be like, oh, this is brutal. And there are a lot of people that watch it. Like, my dad could never watch ufc. Huge boxing fan. But UFC be like, this is just a little bit too brutal for me. Right? But you go into it expecting that thing. If you see a street fight where a dude just pummeling somebody's fucking head, it's like you were just trying to walk home. So that's going to be way more like, I don't want to watch this, and this is fucked up. So I think the environment of the roast is the most extreme version of offensive jokes. Even on stage at a standup comedy club is less extreme than a roast.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Why is violent, tragic death a joke?

[Andrew Schulz]

It's the thing you're not supposed to say. It's the most taboo.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

But where's the funny? Like, I'll give you an example, right?

[Andrew Schulz]

It's on the comedian to make it funny.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I. I just don't see how it's. There have to be funny premises. There's nothing funny about somebody getting shot in the neck. There's nothing funny about somebody getting choked out for nine minutes. Like. Like, I'll give you an example, and I'm not even gonna say no name, but let's just say you're a relationship expert, you're a social media relationship expert, right? And you're always constantly giving advice about, you know, relationships and blah, blah, blah, men and women, you know, you know, who's got value, who doesn't have value? But the rumor is you died having sex with a prostitute, taking dick pills. There's a lot of premises there that could actually probably. That jokes could be made of somebody just getting shot in the neck. Of the street, somebody getting choked out by the police. Why?

[Andrew Schulz]

I mean, the why is how do we make the most unfunny, tragic thing funny? And that's the difficult task. And it's a very difficult task because so many people probably have the sentiment you have. But if you're able to make this heinous thing funny, it's super high level difficulty. It's like diving in the Olympics. You get scored based on your form, but also based on how difficult the dive is or even gymnastics. It's not just how you execute it, it's how difficult the trick is. You need to execute it. So it doesn't mean that just doing the joke, it makes it funny. Clearly, to you it wasn't, but, like, to other people, maybe it was. And maybe the perfect joke about that tragic thing is executed in such a brilliant fucking way, it even gets a tickle out of you. And that's the dice roll you take as a comedian or anybody who's being part of that.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

It's a hell of a dice roll when you're making jokes about people who literally, this just happened, too. So you got family members that are still grieving, loved ones that are still grieving. So you really imagine you just want to watch the roast. Cause you a fan of Kevin Hart, and you see somebody make that joke about your dad or your husband, blah, blah, blah.

[Andrew Schulz]

I mean, I made a joke about

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Kev's dad, but Kev's dad is fair game.

[Andrew Schulz]

Right?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Right, Kev. Not only has Kev made jokes about his dad, Kev's a part of the roast.

[Andrew Schulz]

Oh, you're saying using people that aren't.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

The Floyd family's not a part of the roast. The Kirk family's not a part of the roast, and the joke ends up being about them.

[Andrew Schulz]

Like, instead of that person.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

The joke Tony Hinchcliff made ended up being about George. It wasn't about Kev.

[Andrew Schulz]

And then Pete had that joke about,

[Charlamagne Tha God]

like, unloading in your throat or something.

[Andrew Schulz]

Like, Charlie was funny, though.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I didn't find it amusing. Well, the joke.

[Andrew Schulz]

The joke was about Tony. It wasn't about Charlie.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

It was, but I just don't. I just don't like making jokes about violent, tragic deaths that are so fresh.

[Andrew Schulz]

Bro, you've made so many wild jokes.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Not about death. I don't play about death like that.

[Andrew Schulz]

Yeah, but like, other topics that are really difficult.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I'm with you. I don't listen. I watch. I'm not in here defending any topic except for death. A week ago, what was it? Give Me two.

[Andrew Schulz]

It was so funny, bro. I think I even sent it to you. There's a guy on Breakfast Club who's like, you know, I was. I was, you know, molested when I was 14. And then you were like, yo, me too. It was like you were. You were bonding with him. And he was like, yeah, it was an older boy in the neighborhood. And then you couldn't help yourself and be like, well, well, well, mom was

[Charlamagne Tha God]

a girl now, so I got sexually abused when I was eight. Did you? Yeah. At eight. Eight years old. Wow, bro. Early born.

[Andrew Schulz]

Yeah.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

So it was an older teenage boy that lived across the street. It wasn't a boy, though. It was an older woman. Understood. That wasn't a joke. But it wasn't a joke. I just had to clear the record. That was not a joke. I didn't want.

[Andrew Schulz]

The joke is. The joke is you didn't want nobody

[Charlamagne Tha God]

to think that I got molested by a guy.

[Andrew Schulz]

That's the joke.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Why is that a joke?

[Andrew Schulz]

That's the joke. The joke is that. Why would it be any different?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yeah, it is different. It is different. Why?

[Andrew Schulz]

Why?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

It just is A man touching another little. Touching a little boy is different. It just is.

[Andrew Schulz]

Why?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Because it's a man.

[Andrew Schulz]

Why?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Because it's a lot more layers that come with that type of trauma. Because when you talk to a woman,

[Andrew Schulz]

a woman has more layers.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Because a lot of these guys, after they get touched by men, they start questioning their sexuality.

[Andrew Schulz]

Right.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

And they have to live with that throughout life. That's why if you continue to watch the interview, I even asked them, did you ever question your sexuality?

[Andrew Schulz]

Right.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Because that's usually what happens when a guy gets touched by a guy.

[Andrew Schulz]

So then having a woman do it. Confirm your sexuality?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

If I depend. I got bricked up. You know what I'm saying? I think about now if I could do it again.

[Andrew Schulz]

She was related to you, though, right? By marriage, but you kind of like a Hapsburg.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

See what I'm saying?

[Andrew Schulz]

Like, this is. It's up, but it's just.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

But it's not deaf, I think.

[Andrew Schulz]

I think the point that you're making is, which is kind of. Which is kind of interesting, which is like, the joke is about people that weren't there.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

But then again, I just don't understand why you would want to joke. I don't like to joke about nothing I couldn't handle happening to me.

[Andrew Schulz]

But that's. That's your choice. I guess the question is, are you saying nobody should be able to do it, or are you Just saying, this is your line.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

No, you can. They can do whatever they want. They got freedom of speech. They just got to deal with all the consequences that come with it, or they gotta do it.

[Guest or Producer]

Isn't that what Pete's kind of saying, in a way, is, I can handle it because you said something that wouldn't happen to you? He's like, I've already been this.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Sure.

[Andrew Schulz]

Yeah. I thought the joke was great.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Even though I am not the person that's gonna joke on somebody, I have no problem with Pete, Cheryl and Kevin, they're a part of the roast.

[Andrew Schulz]

Right.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

If they choose to make their life, you know, a fodder.

[Andrew Schulz]

Right. Cool.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I'm just talking about. If you're sitting at home, why make the joke about George Floyd? Why make the joke about Charlie Kirk? For what, you know, these people did not.

[Guest or Producer]

There's even, like, a nuance between those two cases. But.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

And. And think about how violent and sudden and tragic those situations are, bro.

[Andrew Schulz]

Like, I know, but, like, this is where, like, if you can craft the perfect bit. Like, this bit wasn't. These bits didn't. Like, these bits didn't make you laugh. But, like, if you can craft the perfect bit. And it's about just the most heinous thing that ever happened for comedians. Not all comedians. Some comedians, you know, like, doing, like, very relatable stuff and all that kind of stuff. But, like, there's a version where it takes a lot of skill to execute a joke that is, like, very delicate, you know, and.

[Guest or Producer]

Or maybe it wasn't intended to be, which is how I interpreted it.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

What do you mean?

[Guest or Producer]

I interpreted the Charlie Kirk joke as a double fuck you. Like a fuck you to Tony and then within the context of a roast, but like. And also a fuck you to Charlie Kirk's legacy. Somebody who a lot of people loved.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yeah.

[Guest or Producer]

And then somebody a lot of people fucking didn't fuck with.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yeah. I just.

[Guest or Producer]

If you're gonna be fodder in my joke, deal with it.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I'm with you. I just don't want the energy of that, because the reality of the situation is the love him gonna love him. Same way the people that love George Floyd gonna love George Floyd.

[Guest or Producer]

But George Floyd never set out to be a public figure. George Floyd was caught up in a.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

But that's. But that's even why that's.

[Guest or Producer]

Charlie Kirk put himself out there.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

But here's the thing.

[Guest or Producer]

Very specific way.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I don't think you should be a public figure to have empathy for your situation.

[Andrew Schulz]

Right.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You know what? I'm Saying like if we walked out here right now and we saw some random person, you know, get their head blown off, we'd be like, God damn, what the fuck was that about?

[Guest or Producer]

I, I want to be empathetic, but

[Charlamagne Tha God]

you don't want that to be you.

[Andrew Schulz]

But tragedy plus time.

[Guest or Producer]

But that's, I think what you're really saying, what you're almost like worried that this energy is being put in the air and it's gonna like catch you up.

[Andrew Schulz]

Yeah.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

What's the thing we always say about Charlie Kirk? Whenever somebody brings up Charlie Kirk, they'd be like, well, Charlie died for what he believed in. Right. Because didn't he make the statement about, you know, gun casualties are just what happens when you have the right to bear arms, basically. Right.

[Andrew Schulz]

Yeah.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

So we need to be very clear that you're not going to get gun deaths to zero. It will not happen. You can significantly reduce them. You will never live in a society when you have an armed citizenry and you won't have a single gun death. That is nonsense. It's dribble. But I am, I think it's, I think it's worth it. I think it's worth to have a cost of unfortunately some gun deaths every single year so that we can have the second amendment to protect are other God given rights. That is a prudent deal.

[Guest or Producer]

He's chicken came home to roost on.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

And I don't want, no, I don't want that.

[Andrew Schulz]

I don't think. Yeah, I mean the pushback I would give on that is like, I don't think he believed in people killing one another.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

But, but if you make a statement like that, you have to put yourself in that equation as well.

[Andrew Schulz]

Yeah. And I understand Chris's point too, which is like Charlie chose to be a public figure and he chose to sign up for the scrutiny that comes with that not being shot, but the commentary about him as a personality. And that's, we know that very well there are going to be people that say amazing things about us and they're going to be people that say horrible things about us.

[Guest or Producer]

Right.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Like, and I don't need to be a public. I can right now if the news comes in, hey man, a plane crashed on the way to such and such with 100 people in there. You'd be like, who's flying it? But we all ride planes is what I'm saying.

[Andrew Schulz]

Yeah, but there's no part of you that would like to know, I want

[Charlamagne Tha God]

to know how it happened. Of course, you know what I mean? Not like we can prevent a plane crash if we get in a plane. But I would like to know how it happened.

[Guest or Producer]

Yeah.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You know, I mean, and to me, it's like, there's no reason to joke about that situation. I don't like joking about violent, tragic death, because I know that could be

[Andrew Schulz]

any of us, and you're allowed to have that opinion. And like, somebody else's triggers might be a different thing. They don't like. They might be kids. Somebody else's triggers. Everybody got their own shit.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Absolutely.

[Andrew Schulz]

You know what I mean? Like, movie. To me, I think the biggest one that got me was just any of the kids stuff. And maybe I'm a softy as like an adult, you know what I mean? But I think there was one about Draymond's kids or something like that, and I was like, whoa. And I thought Draymond handled it really well.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

But, like, because you love your kids, your kids might be your thumb screw. Your kids might be the one thing you like. All right, bro, cool out. I don't want nobody making jokes about my kids. Everybody has their own thing, and that's. And that's fine.

[Andrew Schulz]

All right, guys, take a break for a second. This podcast is brought to you by Squarespace. Squarespace, the all in one website platform designed to help you stand out and succeed online. Whether you're just starting out or scaling your business, Squarespace gives you everything you need to claim your domain, showcase your offerings with a professional website, grow your brand, and get paid all in one place. If you want your business to be legitimate, you have to have a place for it online. Squarespace is going to help you do that. You can make smarter business decisions with Squarespace's intuitive built in and analytics tools. Review website traffic, learn where to focus engagement. Track revenue for bookings, invoices, or product sales. All from one place. Looking to grow your business now? You can get fast, easy financing through Squarespace Capital. Taylor, you can do that through Squarespace Capital. The application process just takes a few minutes and approval happens in a matter of days. If you're approved, funds will be deposited in your bank account in three to four business days. So you can grow quickly, avoid the hassle of traditional loan process and easily access financing through Squarespace Capital. Loans are issued by Celtic bank and serviced by Stripe. All loans are subject to credit approval. Head to squarespace.com for a free trial and when you're ready to launch, go to use the offer code IDIOTS. To save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Guys, this episode is also Brought to you by not losing your hair. Okay. Don't go bald. Balding is a choice and HIMS is going to help you make that choice. And the choice you're going to make is to keep your hair okay. HIMS offers a convenient access to a range of prescription hair loss treatments with ingredients that work, including chews, oral medications, serums and sprays. Your doctor trusted ingredients like finasteride minoxidil can stop further hair loss and regrow hair in as little as three to six months. I've been on it for almost two decades and I still got my hair. Thank the Lord and thank science. You shouldn't have to go out of your way to feel like yourself. Hims brings expert care straight to you with 100% online access to personalized treatment plans that put your goals first. Find the right hair regrowth treatment for you with flexible subscription Options, access to 24.7 provider support, and once a day treatment options that fit your daily routine. For simple online access to personalized and affordable care for hair loss, weight loss, and more, visit hims.comidiots that's hims.com/idiots. For your free online visit hims.comidiots do you feel like this roast was the same like Brady's? I feel like this one was a bit more going for shock value over the funny man. Brady's was shocking.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yeah, Brady's was shocking shit.

[Andrew Schulz]

I think that. I think the difference for this roast, I would say, is that, like, Kevin is a black dude. Okay? So there's probably way more black joke and there's more black people on the dais, so there's way more racial jokes because of it. And like the roast, a roast at the end of the day does tend to like, pull on tons of like, stereotypes and these types of things. So, like, you're hearing a lot more of it by proxy of who you know you guys are talking about or who the people are talking about. And there might be people on the dais that the people don't really know. The people being the audience. So you're really pulling off of visually what you can see. And so much of a rose is visually what you can see. If you're making fun of Rob Gronkowski, shout out Rob, like calling him retarded and doing all these other things. It's like. Or the Edelman. And these other guys are like the other. Who's the quarterback before Tom Brady?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Drew Bledsoe.

[Andrew Schulz]

Drew Bledsoe. It's just like there's a lot of white guys that you're Just making, like, white guy jokes. And obviously that's not going to come across as racially insensitive. Because a lot of the reaction I've seen online is like, how. How come all these jokes are racist? And it's like, well, you have prominent people of color that are going to be on this day when it comes to Chelsea Handler. They're not going to make fun of her being a white woman. They're going to make fun of her being a whore or make fun of her being childless.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Well, Shane made fun of her being

[Andrew Schulz]

a whore and being Zionist and hanging out with Epstein.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Hanging out with Epstein. Yeah. Yeah, man. How do they pick the people to be on? Cause that's another interesting thing and I guess. Cause I know Kev. So I was just like, I wanted it to be more Def Comedy Jamish, you know what I mean? I feel like there's a lot of different comedians that could have been on that stage that wasn't. That could have roasted Kevin Hart. Like, I don't know where, like, where did Shane come from in Kevin Hart's world? Where did both from Philly or both

[Andrew Schulz]

from, like, the PA area? Imagine, like, they connected.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Where did Tony Hinchcliff come from in the Kevin Hart world? Naim Lin makes all the sense in the world. And he killed it. Regina Hall.

[Andrew Schulz]

Naeem's was fantastic.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Listen, everybody that actually knew Kev.

[Andrew Schulz]

Naeem's been a hilarious comic for decades, by the way. So it's cool to see him.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

By the way. Very dark humor. Always has.

[Andrew Schulz]

He's been.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

But people that actually knew Kev Nae, Regina Hall, Joey, who else was up there that. That, you know, actually knew Kev, I can't think right now, but those people actually bodied it. I wanted more of that. Like, where does the Tony Hinchcliffe's and all of them come in?

[Andrew Schulz]

Well, I think Tony just was. He's really known for this. He's a big figure. He's also big on Netflix.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yeah.

[Andrew Schulz]

You know, so I think that there's that. And he's also like, really good at roasting.

[Guest or Producer]

Like, he's like the way they would have Greg Giraldi on every roast.

[Andrew Schulz]

Exactly. Like you want to have the people that are professionals at that crowd.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I would never have Tony at my. Because he's the one that always causes the problems. He's the reason that this shit is getting all the backlash.

[Andrew Schulz]

But Netflix probably loves it. But he also is fucking fantastic at it. Like, objectively speaking, I enjoyed it up

[Charlamagne Tha God]

until that last part because I was like, why? I was like, ah, come on, bro. Right? Because you got to read the. You got it. First of all, I don't know why you would want to make that joke, but also read the room.

[Andrew Schulz]

He said, chelsea Handler, you're aging like a vegetable in Lizzo's fridge.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Hilarious.

[Andrew Schulz]

That shit.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Hilarious.

[Andrew Schulz]

Regina hall was in the movie One battle after another, as Lizzo calls stairs, stairs.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Body, son.

[Andrew Schulz]

Just body fucking good jokes.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

And I know there's fat people out there. That's like, why don't you have empathy for us, Charlamagne? I like a good fat joke. Okay?

[Andrew Schulz]

That's not your trigger.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

That's not my. But I'm not fat, exactly. You know what I'm saying? But I just def. Is just something we can't come back from, that's all. And by the way, the violence, the violentness of those deaths, yo, just.

[Andrew Schulz]

You getting old, bro. That's it. You getting.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I've never played with death.

[Andrew Schulz]

You getting soft?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Nah, I just. Just can't play with death like that, especially. They're fresh.

[Guest or Producer]

What did you guys think? I've seen a lot of commentary around Katt Williams.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I thought Katt was perfect for the rules. I think that I would have loved to see Katt and Mike Epps, you know, come out there.

[Andrew Schulz]

That would have been very cool, too.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I wonder. Somebody said to me something very interesting, though. They was like, you know, when you listen to Cat on like, Shannon Sharpe show and how he talks about the industry and how he talks about those people, they was like, if Katt really believed that, he wouldn't have come out at all. You know what I'm saying? Like, why would you want to be at that event?

[Andrew Schulz]

I mean, because it's a big event and you want to, you know, but

[Charlamagne Tha God]

you're the anti industry guy. You're the anti of the Kevin Harts and all of those people like that.

[Andrew Schulz]

Maybe he wanted an opportunity to just shit on this guy. He don't. Like in front of the world.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Well, that was.

[Guest or Producer]

I. I haven't seen it, but that was the commentary that. It wasn't jokes.

[Andrew Schulz]

It was. No, it was jokes. I saw it. It was jokes. He. He did a great job. I think Kev handled it.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I mean, it was jokes, but that don't mean it's not true. That's what he didn't find him true, you know? Yeah, that don't mean he didn't believe what he said.

[Andrew Schulz]

There was a lot of that going on all throughout the night, though. Yeah, there was some real shit.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

That's the other thing that I be thinking about with these roasts, especially in regards to Kev, because you can't really do that with Tom Brady. But God damn, man. When people are saying that your movie sucks and, you know, you take every opportunity and you never say no, blah, blah, blah, Kev, I don't know if, you know, people really believe that shit. Yeah, okay. Like, people take the opportunity to really say what they feel about you under the guise of roast, which is why all of that stuff seems even more heinous. Right.

[Andrew Schulz]

Well, that's.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You understand what I'm saying?

[Andrew Schulz]

I do. I do. That's why, like, I'll be honest, I. I was the. The one thing that was a little surprising to me, too, is, like, I thought maybe, like, Cat, I thought Kev's contemporaries, some of them would be on there. You know what I mean?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I mean, that's why I said I wanted it to be more Def comedy jamming.

[Andrew Schulz]

It's not like, Chris Rock.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Where was Chris Rock? Where was, like, Duvall.

[Andrew Schulz]

Yeah, Duvall. This is a big moment celebrating, like, an iconic entertainer, but, like, also specifically and iconic cannon, black entertainer. So there's this version where you go, like, okay, well, where are the other contemporaries? And, like, should they pull up for this event in the same way that, like, if Sinatra's getting roasted, his whole crew is roasting them. You know what I mean? Like, Dean Martin's gonna be there. Sammy Davis Jr. Is gonna be there. The whole crew is gonna be there.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Rickles is gonna be there, and his crew was there. Like, you had the plastic cupboards there. But that's why when Cheryl Underwood went up there, it made so much sense.

[Andrew Schulz]

It was great.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Regina hall killed. Naim killed. Joey killed, like, those people. Cat Williams. Even though, you know, they don't get. They didn't get along. They still were considered peers, so to speak. Right?

[Andrew Schulz]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

So those people. Body.

[Andrew Schulz]

And then maybe that would alleviate a little bit of, like, some of this conversation about, like, the racism and the jokes. If there were more prominent black entertainers

[Charlamagne Tha God]

that were clowning, I don't know why I. No, I do know why Shane was hosting. Cause he's Shane Gillis.

[Andrew Schulz]

Yeah. He's thinking it's a comic. Right.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

It made sense to Netflix, but I think at some point, Netflix has to say, all right, it's the roast of Kevin Hart, so we gotta trust who Kev says should be on this stage.

[Andrew Schulz]

I would not be surprised if Kev wanted Shane to do it.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I'm sure.

[Andrew Schulz]

I thought it was the right. I'll be honest. I thought it was the right shows also for viewership, because Shane and Kev might not have crossover in audience, but if you want to bring Shane's audience, which is massive, to Kev's audience, which is massive. And now you get this beautiful cornucopia of everybody watching this thing.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I ain't with mixing the algorithms no more. Have you not learned that from brilliant idiots? We were so fine for years and

[Andrew Schulz]

then y' all found out about it.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You know what I'm saying?

[Andrew Schulz]

Why you tell your friends?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

We've been over here for 13 years, millions of listeners minding our business. Soon as our shit start getting another algorithm. I know now everybody takes shit out of context.

[Andrew Schulz]

I know misconstrues.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

What we said we had a great thing going, bro. You see what I'm saying?

[Andrew Schulz]

We got too famous. Oh, can't get too famous, guys.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

But I do agree with you. I feel like it should have been more of his contemporaries.

[Andrew Schulz]

I think selfishly, I would like to see it.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

It would have been fire. I just felt like it should have been.

[Andrew Schulz]

Now the question is, do people on Kev's level want to sit there and get made fun of? And I think what happens.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

People on Kev's level?

[Andrew Schulz]

Yeah. Like, Kev is in a very unique situation. We're talking about, like, one of the most famous entertainers alive, Kevin Hart.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I mean, some people say the most successful comic ever. I saw people saying that and it's debatable. But for me, I can only.

[Andrew Schulz]

It's in the conversation for sure.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Kev.

[Andrew Schulz]

Eddie Seinfeld.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Seinfeld. It's very rare air, bro. Yeah, very. I'm not talking about who you think is funny. I'm just talking about success level.

[Andrew Schulz]

Yeah. Like, he's had tv, movies, businesses, all these other things just operating in the standup space. That's why I say entertainer, because, like, Kev's entertainment career has been so successful. It's, it's. It hasn't eclipsed his stand up. Obviously, everybody knows him as a stand up, but like, when you start doing Jumanjis, when you start doing these massive franchises that are like international, it's a very different ball game. The question I have is, like, other people that are in that rare air. Eddie Murphy ain't sitting on that fucking days for two hours getting made fun of by all these people who. You don't know who they are.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Come on, bro. Why never. You know what I mean?

[Andrew Schulz]

Like, so that is a tricky thing about the roast, which is like getting your colleagues to sit there and just take Shots for two and a half hours.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Live.

[Andrew Schulz]

Live.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

So you can't even trust that even if I told you, I'm not going to make a joke about this, and I asked y' all not to, don't mean somebody won't slip it. I'm just saying somebody who did that, you might just put a little extra on it. You know what I mean?

[Andrew Schulz]

That was hilarious. Crying at that.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

That's all I'm saying. I don't know, bro.

[Andrew Schulz]

So. So that's the thing. I don't think they want to do it. And also, you got to keep in mind, the more famous you are.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yeah.

[Andrew Schulz]

The more you're going to be targeted, and the more things people know about you, so the jokes will do better. So it's like, there's certain people in the days that probably get ignored. Right. Because why. Why waste three minutes of your set on this person that people might not know or they might know when you could be shooting at the most well known people on the planet.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yeah. I don't know how many more of these goat roasts y' all gonna get, to be honest.

[Andrew Schulz]

We need Tiger Woods.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

He would never.

[Andrew Schulz]

But.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

He would never.

[Andrew Schulz]

But if you did Tiger Woods.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Phenomenal. By the way, Tyga should do it.

[Andrew Schulz]

Yep.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Tyga shit ain't really crazy. Okay. He was. I'll.

[Andrew Schulz]

I'll do.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I would.

[Andrew Schulz]

Absolutely.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

That's what I'm saying. Tyga shit ain't crazy.

[Andrew Schulz]

I would. I would do Tiger.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

He cheated on his wife. He had a drinking problem, a drug problem. Like that ain't crazy.

[Andrew Schulz]

That's still bothering him to this day.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

No, I'm saying. I'm saying, like, there's a lot of material there. You're right. But it's infidelity. Yes.

[Andrew Schulz]

And car crashes.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yes.

[Andrew Schulz]

It's not like this guy has murdered somebody. It's not like this guy is like. Like, you know, done something like, horrible to hurt humanity, by the way.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You know, it would be.

[Andrew Schulz]

But then you got Asian jokes, black jokes. Oh. That's why he's like. He's four people in one.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

That's hilarious. The whole Asian thing, like, it's hilarious, bro.

[Andrew Schulz]

Like, to me, tiger, Tiger, if Tiger does, I shut down everything. And I. And I.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

But the reason they wouldn't do Tiger,

[Andrew Schulz]

though, was because Tiger won't do it.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yeah. But also, they don't want to. They wouldn't celebrate.

[Andrew Schulz]

Who is they?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Just people, like, people would look at him like, why are y' all celebrating him? Even though he's one of the greatest golfers ever.

[Andrew Schulz]

People Would celebrate him. And let me tell you, 100%. Tiger's been asked.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Oh, he's been asked.

[Andrew Schulz]

It starts with Tiger.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

It starts with Tiger?

[Andrew Schulz]

Yeah.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Oh, before Brady, it was asthma. Tiger. No. Or it's.

[Andrew Schulz]

It starts with Brady and then you go, okay, who? You?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You. Oh, no, Tiger would be perfect.

[Andrew Schulz]

This is how it works with. You know, somebody said this before, like, every movie starts with Tom Hank. I don't care what movie it is. You ask Tom Hanks if he'll do it. And then you ask Leo and then you add, like, that's how it goes. Right. Every movie starts with Denzel. And if he won't do it or he's not interested, you go down the list. So it's Jordan, Tom Brady, Tiger Woods. Those are the people. It starts with Barack.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

He can't.

[Andrew Schulz]

He can't. But it would be crazy.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

The only, the only problem with Tiger is at the end when he got to deliver his joke back, it'd be trash.

[Andrew Schulz]

As long as he didn't have a drive to the podium. I mean, just make him, just make him walk to the podium.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You know, Other than that. Yes. The roasted Tiger woods would be phenomenal.

[Andrew Schulz]

Tiger's so competitive, though. He will find a way to be good at it. He will be working it out non stop. Like he'll. These guys are psycho competitors.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Who else would be good?

[Andrew Schulz]

Jordan. Jordan would be incredible.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I don't know if Jordan would be incredible.

[Andrew Schulz]

He would never do it because why would you put yourself in the situation when you're a billionaire? Yeah.

[Taylor]

Drake couldn't do it for sure.

[Andrew Schulz]

Oh, they asked Drake. I'm sure all the time.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Drake would.

[Taylor]

They wouldn't. Drake would be good, but he would never do that.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Drake would be phenomenal.

[Andrew Schulz]

Because Jake.

[Taylor]

But he should be. He's. He jokes around.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

That's what I'm saying.

[Andrew Schulz]

Drake is actually good at delivering.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

That's what I'm saying. I've seen him do like a little thing.

[Taylor]

He was, he was one of the funniest.

[Andrew Schulz]

Drake would be really good when it came to his time.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yeah.

[Andrew Schulz]

Because not only does he have like punchlines in a rap or whatever, but he understands like performing and jokes.

[Taylor]

Yeah.

[Andrew Schulz]

Time. So it's like Drake would be good and you couldn't really play with him. Like there's certain guys that you're like, okay, they could hit you on shit, but it's not going to be that crazy. Like, like with Tom, we knew that, you know, he was going to say jokes, but it wasn't going to be.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

But you know, what, though? The only reason Drake probably wouldn't be good is because he'd sue if it got too crazy. Like, if it got too crazy. Because you know how they. If you think Kendrick was coming with the old Drake. You like him, y'.

[Mom (storyteller)]

All.

[Andrew Schulz]

Too. Too many compliments.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You know what I mean?

[Andrew Schulz]

No, but you know he would because,

[Charlamagne Tha God]

you know comedians are gonna go crazy. Everything Pusha T and Kendrick. Iceman coming.

[Andrew Schulz]

Iceman coming.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Everything Kendrick and Pusha T said in their diss records over the years, they gonna do that times 100. Drake can't handle. We are. He's told us that he can't handle.

[Andrew Schulz]

That's what I'm saying. Most people that have that make this amount of money. That's why you got to salute Kev. Nobody that is in Kevin's position in entertainment would do that.

[Taylor]

And Williams should do it, too.

[Andrew Schulz]

I don't know if, like, here's the other thing.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I feel like they did want a cat before. It was smart. It wasn't on. I'm not.

[Andrew Schulz]

I'm not trying to be critical, but, like, when you just come out at the end very telling you, it's like, it's a fun surprise for everybody, et cetera, but you don't gotta sit there and get it.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Schulz]

So you get to come in and just do it, but you don't get to get it. And even worse, he went out and then left. At least Lizzo came out towards the end, but she stayed there and got some jokes. Yeah, but he went out and he left.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I disagree, though. Cat not scared. Cat did Wild N out, bro. Cat came up in the. Cat was a member of Wild.

[Andrew Schulz]

It's not whether. And you need comedians. I don't think Cat's scared, by the way. Cat is not scared. Kat can fucking handle himself in any room he goes into, trust me. Especially when it comes to comedy. Like, there's no question about that. What I'm saying is that usually people that are on Kev's level, they're not going to submit themselves to public humiliation for two and a half hours from people they don't even fucking know unless

[Charlamagne Tha God]

it's a humiliation ritual, but unless your contract is up. And so now they got to do this humiliation ritual one last time.

[Andrew Schulz]

What you trying to say before you bow out? What you trying to say? I don't know.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I'm just reading what I saw on the Internet. Yeah. I have no idea about whom. About this. They said it was a humiliation ritual for whom and his contract was up. I don't fucking know. They never tell us these things. Do you ever notice the Internet never goes into details?

[Andrew Schulz]

Can I.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Can I tell you Kevin's contract is up?

[Andrew Schulz]

With who? Them Meek Mill might be on or something. Yo, I saw him in a comment, and it was something about, like, the day after the roast, he said, notice how because there was a blog post about, like, Kevin Hart's production company, like,

[Charlamagne Tha God]

laying people that came out the day

[Andrew Schulz]

of the roast or the day of the roast.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

And then.

[Andrew Schulz]

And then Meek was like, notice how all the blogs are posting the same story the day of the roast about Kev's company doing bad whatever. And I think what he was trying to communicate is there is a coordinated effort that he has been in the receiving end of. Sometimes of these blogs all posting the same stories. They're hitting.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Oh, well, yeah, that's a fact. I mean, literally, the article came out.

[Andrew Schulz]

That shit is corny data celebrating you for the roast.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

And it came out hours before it came out. Like, maybe. Maybe like three, four hours before. And then the next day. Because Kev is so much a part of the algorithm, right? Because everybody's talking about the roast. Bloomberg re pushed it out, so they put it out.

[Guest or Producer]

Well, to be fair, that was original reporting from Bloomberg. It wasn't a blog.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

But it came out on that Sunday, though.

[Guest or Producer]

Well, I think it was in connection to one of the moves around the business. I don't remember.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yo, they don't even drop big stories

[Andrew Schulz]

like that on a Sunday, Chris. Like, they're doing it because they know that he's going to be talked about that day and he can get the

[Charlamagne Tha God]

most view of the story.

[Andrew Schulz]

But it's just. It's like, yes, I get it. That's your business, and that's how you got to get clicks and views or whatever. But, like, to me, it's whack. And to even follow up on it from all the blogs is Meek Mill

[Charlamagne Tha God]

to confirm that, to notice that it's coordinated campaigns against people. We've lived it.

[Andrew Schulz]

Sometimes when you see it from the outside, you know what I mean? Like, when you see on it, when you're going through it on the inside, you're like, I can't let my ego get head. Like, oh, this is a coordinated attack on me. Whatever. But then when you see it so blatant, like, you're like, oh, wow, everything's fake on the Internet. This is interesting.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

We've done autopsy. Well, Chris, we've been doing stuff like this since 2018.

[Andrew Schulz]

I didn't know that we're Sharing with the people

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I've been got to the root of the matter. Oh, I know all of this stuff about bots and, you know, hey, guys, fake accounts and coordinated campaigns.

[Andrew Schulz]

Hey, guys.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Where did you say most of mine originated from? Chris?

[Guest or Producer]

Ussr.

[Andrew Schulz]

Hey, guys, it's coming.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Nachos told me it was India.

[Andrew Schulz]

That's where the bot farms are. Yeah, but hey guys, it's coming. Just so you know, it's coming.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Oh, it's here.

[Andrew Schulz]

No, I mean like the.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

The reveal.

[Andrew Schulz]

Yeah, yeah.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Schulz]

Not yet, but like, you know, slow play.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Absolutely. Absolutely. Absolutely. Let's pay some bills, man.

[Mom (storyteller)]

Your next chapter in healthcare starts at Carrington College's School of Nursing in Portland. Join us for our open house on Tuesday, January 13th from 4 to 7pm you'll tour our campus, see live demos, meet instructors, and learn about our associate degree in nursing program that prepares you to become a registered nurse. Take the first step toward your nursing career. Save your spot now at Carrington Edu Events. For information on program outcomes, visit Carrington Edu Sci.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Church announcements. Hezekiah Walker. Yes, man.

[Andrew Schulz]

This week we'll be in Salt Lake City, man. Thank you guys for selling out all the shows. Love Salt Lake. Great comedy scene. And then we got June 5th and 6th will be at Virginia Beach. And then August 8th, I'll be in Halifax, Nova Scotia for the Great Outdoors Festival. And also doing something very cool on June 4, we got a charity paddle event that we're doing the Life Paddle Classic with. Myself and Neurogum has gotten involved and they're supporting as well. And we're going to raise a bunch of money for IVF and people who are, you know, financially strapped and are struggling to bring kids into this world. We want to alleviate some of that. That pressure. So we're going to do it. This charity that I've been working with called BabyQuest, they're absolutely phenomenal and it's helping people start their families. So 100% of the proceeds from the Life Paddle Classic are all going to BabyQuest. And basically what's going to happen is June 4th, we're going to have a paddle tournament. If you want to come check it out, you're more than welcome to come check it out. If you can't, for whatever reason, make sure that you support by buying the. The dad bundle. Okay? They got the dad Bundle available at Neuro Gum right now. They got the energy and focus and they got a little nighttime and sleep and recharge mints as well.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

So make more.

[Andrew Schulz]

You check that every purchase of the dad Bundle will fund the IVF support for families who are otherwise may not be able to afford the treatment. So this is about community, family, giving people a real shot of becoming parents. It's something that's obviously near and dear to my wife and I's hearts, how we were able to bring both of our kids into the world. So if you guys like support, you can go buy that dad Bundle on Eurogum's website or you can come out June 4th to Paddle House in Dumbo, Brooklyn, phenomenal paddle facility here in New York City and sign up, become part of the tournament and let's go. This could be great. Raise a lot of money and help a lot of people. It'll be awesome if you guys can't support. So if you can't be there, go buy some neuromints, go get that Andrew Schultz and Neuro Dad Bundle and just help us raise some money for families going through ivf.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I am so happy you found a cause, man.

[Andrew Schulz]

Oh, man, thank you.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

No, for real. Everybody needs to have a cause that is near and dear to their heart. And it's always best when it's something that, you know, you've have. You've had lived experience. You know what I mean? I hear that. Like, I. And it happens so organically, right? Like, you know, this is something you actually went through, something you experienced and you just talked about it naturally and look at all the beautiful things that came from it. The life special, you know, now you out here giving back, you know, helping other people that are going through it. I think that's. That's phenomenal.

[Andrew Schulz]

It is cool, man. Like, people actually get to start a family and yes, man, help them with that journey. That's pretty cool.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Now what if, you know, somebody goes through all of this and then they have a child that just becomes a terrible human being in the future?

[Andrew Schulz]

Yo, you know what? I actually thought about that.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You know what I mean? You know what I'm saying?

[Andrew Schulz]

I thought about.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Think about all the money people spend on ivf and then you just raise a heathen.

[Andrew Schulz]

I thought about that. Like, what if they do something horrible?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yeah.

[Andrew Schulz]

And now we're like kind of part of that system.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You see what I'm saying?

[Andrew Schulz]

But at the same time, like, what if somebody who's on, you know, Medicaid or whatever, you know, has to go to the hospital? They don't have to pay for their treatment because they obviously can't, but they do.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

They let you keep the receipt.

[Andrew Schulz]

What do you mean?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

What do you mean? Would I be able to return it? Yeah.

[Andrew Schulz]

Can you return it?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yes.

[Andrew Schulz]

No, but I'm saying like, people still got to deliver babies, but they can't pay for it. So we're paying for that delivery of those babies. And then those people can go out and do horrible things. So we're all kind of responsible in a way. This is more directly responsible for sure. But those, those parents have extra pressure because now we're. And we're implicated.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Shit is rough out here, bro.

[Andrew Schulz]

Like, but what if they do something amazing? What if they save the world now we're part of that process.

[Guest or Producer]

You won.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yeah, but you always gotta at things from both sides.

[Andrew Schulz]

You have to look at things from both sides.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

No, I'm just prone to look at things from the negative.

[Andrew Schulz]

I know, I know, but they could become the next school shooter. We don't do IVF for whites. This, this is a. This is a non white IVF charity to avoid potential school shooters. No, I'm joking. Everybody could do it.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Okay?

[Andrew Schulz]

Every type of couple.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

No, no, I like the ddi ivf. D E I V F is fire.

[Andrew Schulz]

Y' all don't need any help.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

D E I V F. The whites need the help. Listen. D E I V F is fire.

[Andrew Schulz]

D E I V F. I like that. I like that.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

DE IVF is fire. Did you hear the story about how people are dating less?

[Andrew Schulz]

No, you gotta go your stuff. You didn't do your church announcements?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Oh, shit, Jess. Hilarious book. Available everywhere. You buy books, right? Yeah. Tell deaf. Do we parent? Shout out.

[Andrew Schulz]

Jess, man.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Hey and salute to my guy, Doug Melville. Man. Doug Melville wrote a great article for Forbes. Man. Doug is my guy. Doug couldn't even.

[Andrew Schulz]

Couldn't even big you up, Jess. I tried and he just pivoted a bit.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I'm doing, I'm doing a her to her.

[Andrew Schulz]

Oh, okay.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

There's nobody better, okay. Nobody more self serving than Jess. Hilarious. Okay. It don't matter what the topic. She'll bring it back to her. Okay, but no shot. But this is part of it though. Shout out to my guy, Doug Melville. He wrote an article for Forbes called Is Charlamagne the God? The Book Whisperer. His imprints, New York. I saw this Bestseller. Say yes.

[Andrew Schulz]

So I saw this.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

That is very cool. It's just good recognition. I always appreciate, you know, I appreciate anybody who sees me, you know what I mean? Sees what I'm out here doing. Cause you know, those are things that people don't necessarily pay attention to, which I don't need the recognition. I want the imprint to get the recognition. Black Privilege Publishing. But thank you, thank you. And Lil Jon's book is on the way. You could go pre order that right now.

[Andrew Schulz]

But you play a part of curating it, a huge part of curating it. So you deserve credit.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yeah, I mean, listen, you know, these are people who either inspired me in some way, or I can just look at their story and see how it inspires people. Like, you can look at a Dawn Staley and see how her story would inspire people and be like, don, you need to write a book. Like, you know what I'm saying? Little John, like, I grew up off Little John. He provided the soundtrack for so many of our lives. But he's such an interesting individual because the character that Dave Chappelle played, I didn't know Little John back then.

[Andrew Schulz]

Right.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

But knowing him now, the character's perfect.

[Andrew Schulz]

It's identical.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

That's who he. I mean, you see it now. We see he does meditation albums. Yeah, yeah. You know what I mean?

[Andrew Schulz]

He's a fascinating guy physically.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You see how he looks now? You know what I mean? And the name of his book is I Only Shout so you can hear me.

[Andrew Schulz]

Well, make sure you guys go support that.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yeah, make sure you pre order that right now. What else we got? But no, did you see this shit about how people are dating less because of the economy,

[Andrew Schulz]

going out to eat less or dating.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

They said dating less because for whatever reason, this generation thinks you have to go somewhere and do something to go out. I have.

[Andrew Schulz]

I have close friends who I know you guys know and shout out to Dove. Damn, bro.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

What? Shout out to Dove.

[Andrew Schulz]

And he's his.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Don't blame Dove being cheap on this. Don't you dare try to blame Doves cheapness on this store.

[Andrew Schulz]

When I was in Denver, one of the shows, there was some deaf people in the audience. So, like, by state law, they bring a sign language interpreter on stage for the whole show, and they gotta interpret everything that I say for the whole show, bro, I gotta show you some

[Charlamagne Tha God]

of this footage, man. You gotta put that shit out.

[Andrew Schulz]

I gotta show you.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You was fucking with him.

[Andrew Schulz]

Oh, son. I got it. It was crazy. Cause, like, somebody said, we'll probably cut this. But, like, somebody said like. Like Jew. And then she goes like this for Jew.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Why the fuck that could be Santa Claus.

[Andrew Schulz]

So that's. So I was like, you know, I think we're all surprised that that was the choice for Jew. And I go, like, you know, I think maybe there's some of us that thought it'd be this or this. And then I go. Or that. So no bullshit. I go, what's. I go, what's Asian and no bullshit. She goes like this.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

What the fuck was that? Can't drive. Get the fuck out of there.

[Andrew Schulz]

I'm saying these deaf motherfuckers are racist.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Why don't you do karate or something?

[Andrew Schulz]

That's what I thought. That's what I thought.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I mean, that's stereotypical, too, but God damn, bro.

[Andrew Schulz]

It was funny, dude. It was fun.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

But I think about when I was broke back in the day, right? Yeah, I was creative. That was the whole beauty of, like, you know, growing up in the 1900s, man. Like, you know, you write a little letter.

[Andrew Schulz]

He said he doesn't do dinner dates. That's what I was getting at.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

He doesn't do dinner dates.

[Andrew Schulz]

Cause it's like, you go out to dinner, it's 300 fucking dollars. You don't even know if you like each other. It's like, tell me.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You know what I did with my wife back in the day? A picnic, bro. Go have a fucking picnic.

[Taylor]

Wait, why is that so? Why are you laughing at that? Have a picnic.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

And you from New York. Y' all got Central Park.

[Andrew Schulz]

Exactly. Yo, fuck.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Y' all got that grassy. Notice that grassy knoll on the west side highway that everybody be in sometimes. Maybe that's Central park, too. I don't.

[Andrew Schulz]

Fuck.

[Taylor]

What happened to being creative?

[Andrew Schulz]

That's the gayest shit I ever heard in my entire life. You show up with a wicker basket and a blanket in that motherfucker, no girl is sitting on the ground with you.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I would love that, bro. Fire me. Don't suggest picnics.

[Taylor]

I've done it.

[Andrew Schulz]

Yeah, but not on a first date, Taylor.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Why not?

[Andrew Schulz]

You're gonna go on a first date and just sit in the grass?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Why not?

[Taylor]

I like creativity.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

That's how homeless people do.

[Taylor]

No, no, no.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I like.

[Andrew Schulz]

That's what homeless people do.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

We want things homeless. What if we motherfucking government workers who haven't had a check in a while, but y' all feeling you man put

[Taylor]

his creativity and then painting. You could do a sip and paint there.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

No, no.

[Andrew Schulz]

Go coffee, go to school, Go get a drink at a bar.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

What if I don't like coffee? Drinks are expensive.

[Andrew Schulz]

But less expensive than a whole dinner. Cause dinner got drinks, too.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Less expensive than a whole dinner. Cause dinner got drinks, too. That's why you have a picnic and you go to the store and get you a little bottle of wine or something.

[Andrew Schulz]

No, don't do this.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You drinking, guys. Picnic. Picnic.

[Andrew Schulz]

That's a fun thing to do after you know somebody already. But the first date.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

First date?

[Andrew Schulz]

Nah.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Nature.

[Andrew Schulz]

Meet me in the park.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Meet me in the park. That's what Jamie MC Said, right? Did he say, meet me in the park?

[Andrew Schulz]

Meet me at the corner of the parking lot.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Garage. I don't see nothing wrong with a picnic on the first date. But by the way, here's the thing that we're not talking about. The fact that if a woman actually likes you, she'll go with you anyway. She don't even matter.

[Taylor]

Exactly. But you also forget the part. How long until y' all do the first date too, though? Like. Because if they're talking on the phone for a couple of weeks and then do the first date, then it's not a problem.

[Andrew Schulz]

Talks for a few weeks before the first date. Now you gotta crack cheeks if you've been talking for a few weeks.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

By the way,

[Andrew Schulz]

in this economy, that's crazy. And dick are free.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Damn. Damn.

[Andrew Schulz]

They are damn crazy, but they are. Come over. We got ac.

[Taylor]

Come over is crazy.

[Andrew Schulz]

Why is that?

[Taylor]

Going over your house on the first date.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You shouldn't. And you're smart.

[Andrew Schulz]

But why not?

[Taylor]

That's dangerous.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

That is very dangerous. That's why you gotta find safe spaces.

[Andrew Schulz]

But why is that dangerous?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Because I don't know you.

[Andrew Schulz]

It's more dangerous for me. You're in my house.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Nah, I wouldn't even want.

[Andrew Schulz]

I don't know you.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Exactly.

[Andrew Schulz]

I'm taking the risk.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

So don't do it. Public place. We meet, we go out, we kick it, we have fun. I'm telling you guys. Picnic, man. Subway sandwiches, Doritos, you know what I'm saying? Bottles of water. And y' all go out there and talk about how tough life is right now.

[Taylor]

I'm really not mad at that. I like outdoors. I like walking and everything.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Like, that's springtime, summertime.

[Andrew Schulz]

Well, you don't. Yo, take her for something.

[Taylor]

I'm gonna have to eat something.

[Andrew Schulz]

But take her for a ride on the subway. Yeah. And that's what you're suggesting?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

No.

[Taylor]

That's nice.

[Andrew Schulz]

The first thing she's gonna do is just tell her friends how broke you are.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yeah, and she broke, too. That's the first of all. Let's talk about. They could be broke. They could be broke.

[Andrew Schulz]

They could be broke.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

And men is where you gotta take your power back. They could be broke. Men take your power back. The same thing that women want from us, we gotta want from them. What if we started talking about we don't want no Broke ass woman. We don't want no broke ass.

[Andrew Schulz]

But girls always got a thousand dollars.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Why

[Andrew Schulz]

girls always got a thousand dollars?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Not in this economy.

[Andrew Schulz]

No. In this economy specifically, every girl got a thousand.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Not in this economy.

[Andrew Schulz]

Every girl.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Nobody got a stack to give. No box. In this economy.

[Andrew Schulz]

No. There's guys out there with a stack to give. Get one of these crypto dudes, a tech guy.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

They got bad girls. So are you happy being just a number on the roster?

[Andrew Schulz]

I just said you got 1000. Every girl got the first thousand. Damn.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Damn. I mean, listen, you could be an eater on a rich man's roster if that's what you want.

[Taylor]

I just don't know what happened to creativity.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

What happened to creativity?

[Andrew Schulz]

You girls got like, don't put me in that category.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You know what? I can tell you what happened to creativity. When women put so much emphasis on guys having money. So guys felt like, all I gotta do is have the money.

[Andrew Schulz]

Exactly.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Forget focusing on being creative.

[Andrew Schulz]

I'll do what y' all want. Exactly. If you guys like fucking poets, we'd be writing poetry.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Word of God.

[Andrew Schulz]

Y' all like hedge fund managers love poets.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You like money and poetry got you to pussy. Niggas would be out here rhyming they ass off.

[Andrew Schulz]

Women dictate society. Men gravitate towards the things that women want. If women are upset with society, change it.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yes, it's your fault.

[Andrew Schulz]

You could fuck society into whatever you want it to be. You want us in skinny jeans, we wear skinny jeans. You want us in baggy jeans, we wear baggy jeans. Apply that to jobs.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I got my eyebrows arched back in the day. Cause some women convinced me to do it. They told me that's a.

[Andrew Schulz]

He got his back arched.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

That's what they told me. That's what Tupac told me to do.

[Taylor]

That's y' all being dumb.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

He said Tupac got his eyebrows arched. I said all arch on me.

[Taylor]

How about y' all have a mind?

[Andrew Schulz]

Teachers. No start teachers. I guarantee you these students will get way better grades because all the smart dudes will go and start teaching so

[Charlamagne Tha God]

they can get laid.

[Andrew Schulz]

If society is up in a free society where women can choose to do whatever they want and they can reward whatever they want, then it's on women.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Put poetry over the paper.

[Andrew Schulz]

That's it.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

The poetry is what you want guys to do. And I'll start being a poet.

[Andrew Schulz]

That's it.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Violence. The poetry.

[Taylor]

I've always said, like a magic trick. And you like my little dad joke.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

See what I'm saying? A Magic trick. Abracadabra. Panties disappear.

[Taylor]

You know that's fire. I love a magic trick. I love a magic trick. I love that it has to be a dope ass magic trick.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Magic trick. Shout out to P For pulling that rabbit out the hat.

[Taylor]

Shout out to me.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Now we know how you got it. Shout out to P. Shout out to my.

[Andrew Schulz]

That.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

He said, I got the magic stick.

[Andrew Schulz]

I wish we had that on camera.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I love a magic.

[Andrew Schulz]

I love a magic trick.

[Taylor]

I do.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Shout out to Pete.

[Taylor]

It is what it is.

[Andrew Schulz]

All right.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Shout out to Pete.

[Andrew Schulz]

You want a good magic trick? Come here. Okay. Ready? You can come here. You can come here. Ready? Take this. Don't look me in the eyes. You obviously. Okay, Right. Take this. Right. I want you to. I don't want to say blow on that, but I want you to say abracadabra. Right? Abracadabra. Yeah, you do that. Say abracadabra. £ one time, £ two times, £ three times. Jesus Christ. Disappear.

[Taylor]

I knew where it was already. That wasn't a magic trick.

[Andrew Schulz]

Oh, it's in this hand.

[Taylor]

Yes.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Do you think she's three. Oh, shit.

[Andrew Schulz]

You put it somewhere.

[Taylor]

Can you. You had me focus on.

[Andrew Schulz]

Go back and sit down, man. That's magic.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Door would be fire.

[Andrew Schulz]

That's magic.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

On his cock. That's why it would be fire. If y' all was actually. No, seriously. If he was actually trying to holler at you and y' all was actually kicking it and been on a few dates and y' all like each other, he makes the ring disappear and you can't find it, but then you find it on his cock. Fire.

[Taylor]

I'm gonna be mad with that.

[Andrew Schulz]

I love this guy.

[Taylor]

I mean, it would be dope.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

That would be fire. You be telling your girls, like, oh, he took a R and he made it disappear and it reappeared on his cock. I had to fuck him.

[Taylor]

Can I say something, though, about the

[Andrew Schulz]

dating scene real quick?

[Taylor]

What?

[Andrew Schulz]

Take off your shoe.

[Taylor]

Which one? Doesn't matter.

[Andrew Schulz]

Right shoe. Now look in that right shoe. Turn it upside down. Shake it out. There's nothing in here, you dumbass.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

The way.

[Taylor]

But that's not. How you going to get the plushy, though, then?

[Andrew Schulz]

No, that's obviously. I'm not trying to do that.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Why not? Just see, y' all can see it.

[Taylor]

But wait, can I to say, though, the problem too, though, with dating, like, for instance, me and my man, like, we came in with the tension of what we wanted from each other.

[Andrew Schulz]

So you guys were very serious about your relationship. Yeah.

[Taylor]

But other people, they Say they want a serious relationship, but they not willing to take those.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You're right. Like, you and P clearly were soulmates. Y' all had an intention. Y' all know y' all wanted to spend the rest of your life with each other. Most people would be wanting just to.

[Taylor]

Yeah.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You know what I'm saying? If you find that special person that you actually want to be with, you will be intentional about it.

[Andrew Schulz]

Not to divert here, but come over here one last time. Yelling Just come one last time. One last time. Go One last time. Come here.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Magic might work for real. Magic might be it. For real, guys. Magic.

[Andrew Schulz]

Okay, ready? I want you to say. I want you to put your hands down. Okay. Look, I'm not doing anything right. Okay.

[Taylor]

Who's behind me?

[Andrew Schulz]

Stay right there. Stay right there. Hold on. Okay. Was that crazy that it was in your hair the whole time? Was that crazy that it was in your hair the whole time?

[Taylor]

Yes. It was so crazy, you didn't know it Sound crazy.

[Andrew Schulz]

How did I do that?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

He did magic to me.

[Andrew Schulz]

How did I do that?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Oh, my God. How did I do that? I don't know how it happened.

[Andrew Schulz]

Can you explain how I did it?

[Taylor]

I don't know where you were hiding the ring at.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Imagine what he would do with a condom. That's why you got to be careful out here. There's a lot of magicians.

[Andrew Schulz]

Yeah, that's fact.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

But no, be creative, man. Get back to being creative. Yo,

[Andrew Schulz]

you can't reason with the sun. Trust us.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

We've tried.

[Andrew Schulz]

This summer, it's time to put that angry ball of fire on mute. Columbia's Omnishade technology is engineered to protect you from the sun's harsh rays that can burn and damage your skin. The sun is relentless, but so is our gear. Level up your [e-mail] to spend more time outside and less time slathering on aloe lotion. You're welcome, Columbus. Columbia engineered for whatever.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Let's do some asking idiots first. Yeah, let's do some asking idiots. I gotta go do Daily show, man.

[Andrew Schulz]

Oh, you're doing Daily Show?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yeah.

[Andrew Schulz]

What are you guys talking about?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

What am I talking about? Tonight. Tonight I am. I'm telling the GOP to just stop being pussy.

[Andrew Schulz]

Gop? Yeah, the GOP to stop being pussy. Say it. Talk to me.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

When will this end? This will probably. Yeah, this will be out after Daily Show. I'm essentially telling the GOP, let us know in 2028. Is it gonna be a Democrat versus a Republican or a Democrat versus a King? Stop pussyfooting. Around the whole 20, 28. We know y' all want Trump to run again. We know y', all, you know, trying to say, fuck the Constitution. We see what's happening with the redistricting, and let's just go ahead and make it happen.

[Andrew Schulz]

Question on that, like, how could he possibly run again based on popularity? Like, isn't it in the GOP's best interest to get this guy to fuck up out of here?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Guys, guys, guys.

[Andrew Schulz]

You think they're gonna get in line with another fucking war for no reason? No. Epstein files.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

If he runs again. It doesn't matter. Democracy as we know it is done. It's. It would be a sham election.

[Andrew Schulz]

Sure, sure, sure. Agree, agree, agree. You get the point I'm trying to make, which is like, if. If you're going to be king, you gotta just be king. Because if you actually ran, who the fuck would support you even in your own party?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I agree. Other than the, like the die Hard maga.

[Andrew Schulz]

But they're retarded at this point. You're retarded. Like, I'm sorry. Literally permanent war. Epstein files like this is.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

He literally said this week he doesn't care about American people's financial situation.

[Andrew Schulz]

I saw that shit.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

All he cares about is that Iran don'. Nuclear weapons. What the fuck? Yeah. Since when can a president multitask? Since when can a president make sure Iran don't have nuclear weapons but also care about the promise that you said won you the election? You told us that you won the election because of one word, groceries. And you said you was gonna fix the economy on day one. Now you don't give a fuck about America's financials.

[Andrew Schulz]

He can care about Iran and Gulf, but he can't care about Iran. And. And if Americans can afford to put food in their mouths.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Nah, dude. There was an interesting video I saw. Let me see if I can find this video. I want to know what you.

[Andrew Schulz]

I'm curious to see which one. Which people in the GOP start separating from him so that they could start building up the base.

[Guest or Producer]

Hasn't the one guy started already, JD or Rubio? No, no, no. The senator who's been kind of at the Massey. Massey at the face of the Epstein stuff.

[Andrew Schulz]

Oh, is he going to run?

[Guest or Producer]

Well, I feel like he's made the most kind of, like, distinct split so far.

[Andrew Schulz]

Oh, he's been on that ass from the beginning.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

And respect a dude from a senator from South Carolina, too.

[Andrew Schulz]

But one is not enough.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

The one that basically told Trump that, yo, we not doing this redistricting you can't call me and tell me what to do. What's his name? His name is.

[Guest or Producer]

But did you see the hearings with the nominees? Oh, that's Massey.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

That's Shane Massey.

[Andrew Schulz]

Yeah.

[Guest or Producer]

For federal judges.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I'm talking about the other Massey you talk about, the one that be with Ro Khan.

[Guest or Producer]

Yeah, that one. But what I'm talking about is they asked, I think it was nominees for a federal judge position, would they just out and out say that Trump running for a third term was unconstitutional?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Oh, I use that clip. I'm using that on the Daily Show.

[Guest or Producer]

They won't say it.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

He won't even. He can't even just say who won't say it? It's unconstitutional. Just say it.

[Andrew Schulz]

These motherfuckers are so pussy.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Just say it's unconstitutional. Cause it is.

[Taylor]

It is past.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I want to know what y' all think of this. I find this interesting. Listen to this.

[Mom (storyteller)]

Soon you guys are all going to see that this has absolutely nothing to do with them worrying about losing the midterms. They wouldn't be worried about singular seats like South Carolina, which is already a red state. And I highly doubt it's going to change. It's not. This has everything to do with them trying to get to the meat and potatoes of their plan. I mean, it's logical thinking, you know, gerrymandering. They're trying to get the seeds because they don't want to lose the midterms. Very surface level.

[Andrew Schulz]

They gonna lose.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

No, no, no, listen.

[Mom (storyteller)]

The real meat and potatoes is them getting 2/3 majority so they can change the Constitution. That's, that's the real, I mean, guys. And the sooner that we realize that, the sooner that everybody starts to realize what they're doing, then we can figure out what to do next.

[Andrew Schulz]

As a whole guys, or should I say as a people, can I first of all, like one. Terrifying. But also, how on earth is it possible that the Democrats could lose the midterms given unbelievable levels of corruption from the administration and the cronies. Another war that nobody asked for and nobody understands and nobody supports. Unless you are having have family in Iran or you have family in Israel. Those are the only people I've spoken to in America that are like, all right, this sounds good. Ok. None of the wars they said are going to stop have been stopped. Like, and refusal for a single person to get arrested over the Epstein files. Like, not the only person that's been arrested over the Epstein files outside of Epstein, who's dead, is is Ghislaine Maxwell, which is already Hilarious that like a woman, the one woman involved is the only person in jail. How can the Democratic Party not.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Because Republicans are going to cheat in a free and fair. If it was a free and fair election, it wouldn't be close.

[Andrew Schulz]

But how do you cheat? How do you convince people that they're doing a good job? What are they delivering on for you? What can they hang their hat on? That's what I'm trying to understand.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I'm with you. All I'm simply saying is everybody needs to look alive because the rigging is clearly happening right now.

[Andrew Schulz]

But this is a golden opportunity. Galvanized support against this. Why are you telling me there's a chance that they might win? How is there not gerrymandering?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

But what this woman just said is true. It ain't about the gerrymandering. It's about getting the 2/3 so they can change the.

[Andrew Schulz]

Why are we even talking about 2/3 majority? Like you should be getting swallowed up in the midterms. How did the conversation go from absolute demolishing in the midterms to now? They potentially could get a 2/3 majority after the mid. Like what is happening here?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

If they get to. Who knows? Trump is.

[Andrew Schulz]

Trump and administration are handing. They're handing America on a silver.

[Guest or Producer]

And obviously I agree, but what just happened in Indiana? He picked five, you know, seven guys. Five of them won. Like, I mean, can you play? This is one of the most extraordinary clips I've ever seen.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I've seen it.

[Andrew Schulz]

We see it. Mr. Mark, is President Trump eligible to run for president again in 2028? Senator with it, without considering all the facts and looking at everything, depending on what the situation is, this to me strikes as more of a hypothetical, of something that could be not a hypothetical. Has President Trump elected president twice? President Trump has been certified the President of the United States two times. Is he eligible to run for a third term under our Constitution? I would have to review the.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

All I need to tell you is

[Andrew Schulz]

the language of the constitutional amendment that makes it clear that no, he is not eligible. Eligible to run a third term. Anybody else brave enough to say that the Constitution of the United States prevents President Trump from seeking a third term? That guy's an elected official. Who is that guy that he's anybody willing to apply the Constitution by its plain language in the 22nd Amendment? Who is he speaking to? Nobody. All right, let's move on.

[Guest or Producer]

Is this like a Republican nominee for judge, Federal judge. And the guy won't. Won't say it's unconstitutional or run for 30%.

[Andrew Schulz]

How can you be a judge if you're not even gonna honor the Constitution?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

So to answer your question, Schultz, I don't fucking know. I just know everybody needs to look alive. You know what I'm saying? That's all the fuck I can tell you. Everybody look alive. There's a clear offensive game plan that has been created. Motherfuckers need to have a defense. That's all I know.

[Andrew Schulz]

Yo, he's giving you the offense and the defense by being historically unpopular. Like, I don't understand how, but he's not unpopular.

[Guest or Producer]

If Republicans in Indiana follow his lead and vote for him, people still fuck with him as.

[Andrew Schulz]

Yeah, but I don't know if, like, Indiana is the litmus test for the whole country.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

What state was the guy who won. Who won the seat? He won by like 68% of the vote. And they.

[Guest or Producer]

Oh, Louisiana, where they threw out 45,000 votes.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

They just threw it out? Like, no, no, we're getting rid of that.

[Andrew Schulz]

Why?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I would have fucked.

[Andrew Schulz]

No. Well, what would their justification be?

[Guest or Producer]

The guy didn't give a justification. I mean, you can find the clip. He basically said, it's not my job to explain why

[Charlamagne Tha God]

he said that, right? Yeah, yeah, he said that. See if you can find that clip.

[Andrew Schulz]

Hold on.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I want y' all to know this case. Hold on. 68% of votes, seat thrown out. Damn, I knew the dude name too, man. Yes, he won 68. Calvin Duncan. That's his name. Hold on, Let me pull up the story of Calvin Duncan. Calvin Duncan, black man in it was Louisiana.

[Guest or Producer]

That's the clip I'm thinking of. I'm not sure if it's his name, but in Louisiana, they definitely threw out about 40,000 votes.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yes, Calvin Duncan, a black man and Democrat, won 68% of the vote to become Orleans Paris, Clerk of Criminal Court. Before you could take office, Louisiana Republicans passed a bill to eliminate the very position he won, and the governor signed it into law. The people voted, he won. Then the position itself was targeted after the outcome. Like, what the fuck are we talking about? This happened on May 3, 2026. A federal judge had to step in and block the law, ruling it unconstitutional because it stripped voters of their choice after the election had already taken place. Now look at who is making these decisions. Republicans control about 70% of the Louisiana legislature and the overwhelming majority of are white. In the Louisiana House, out of more than two dozen black legislators, only two are Republicans. The rest are Democrats. And let's be clear. This isn't about who would take over the duties the person is. That role is a. The person in that role is a black Democrat. That actually makes the point even clearer. This isn't about replacing one person. It's about eliminating the position after voters made their decision. And then the same people turn around and tell black folks to stop talking about race.

[Andrew Schulz]

Where are the, where is CNN talking about this? Whereas like Ms. Now talking about this.

[Guest or Producer]

This clip is everywhere.

[Andrew Schulz]

Okay, this specific one or the story?

[Guest or Producer]

Yeah, the Louisiana right now?

[Mom (storyteller)]

Both.

[Andrew Schulz]

Okay, good.

[Guest or Producer]

Everywhere.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I wouldn't say everywhere. Chris, you love, you still love giving mainstream media a lot of credit that they don't.

[Guest or Producer]

I don't, I don't watch any mainstream media, honestly, for the.

[Andrew Schulz]

How. You know, it's everywhere.

[Guest or Producer]

I've seen it in a lot of places. That feels like everywhere.

[Andrew Schulz]

I was talking about mainstream media. Like, this is what I'm trying to. This is what I'm trying to say. Like we can get out there and we can white knight about how things are fucked up, but when these stories come out and they're not populated through mainstream media, they're not populated through cnn,

[Guest or Producer]

they're not populated CBS News, ML Ms. Now, Axios, pbs, the Hill.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You know what the problem is how they talk about these stories. So they'll be like, can Donald Trump run for another term? Is it unconstitutional?

[Andrew Schulz]

They got more stories about Hasan Piker than they do about this.

[Guest or Producer]

Well, this is my question argument in general. I think all the information is very much out there. I think for whatever reason, it doesn't resonate. And I'm being out, I'm feeling fatigue right now. Like I look at all this stuff and I'm like, I don't even know where to start. I don't even know what to focus on. I don't even know. I mean, something like this clip is easy to kind of gravitate towards cuz it's so blatant and there's no room to misinterpret something like that. There's no other side of this coin that they're not showing you. This is a Cinco fan who's just there to do Trump's orders, blatantly saying, I refuse to answer whether Trump can serve a third term. Right. So maybe this, no, maybe this one I gravitate towards.

[Andrew Schulz]

But you're not even someone running for office. You're a judge. A judge bound to the Constitution, to the law. To the law.

[Guest or Producer]

There's no way to misinterpret what the law is. There's no nuance in that. You can't run for a fucking Third term.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Period, by the way. This is how you rile people up. This is how you radicalize people. There's patriots out here that love the motherfucking Constitution.

[Andrew Schulz]

Love it.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Think about what they. Think about what they. When they thought that an election was being stolen, what did they do? They stormed the motherfucking Capitol.

[Andrew Schulz]

I mean, is there any even example in history of a president running for a third term?

[Guest or Producer]

Well, sure. I mean, we didn't enact that until FDR, he served three terms, so FDR, it's the last 85 years, but.

[Andrew Schulz]

Well, to me, my point is, like, he did three, and then it was enacted, and then this is current law.

[Guest or Producer]

I believe so.

[Andrew Schulz]

Got it. Okay, that makes sense. So this is the law, and you were bouncing along law.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

It's unconstitutional. It's in the Constitution. It literally says, you can't run. You can do two terms. That's it. Let's do some asking to this.

[Andrew Schulz]

Taylor.

[Taylor]

This is also a president that was supposed to go to jail, and he just took a mug shot and left.

[Andrew Schulz]

I don't know what Taylor's saying right now.

[Taylor]

Wasn't he supposed to go to jail?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Taylor's amazing.

[Andrew Schulz]

She is. She is. She is.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Taylor will be like, this is also.

[Taylor]

I hate y'.

[Andrew Schulz]

All.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You know? Like, this is also cereal. You pour milk in it and eat it with a spoon. All right. And preferably for breakfast.

[Andrew Schulz]

All right.

[Taylor]

What are you talking about?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I'm just saying, like.

[Andrew Schulz]

Taylor, you want to see another mag?

[Taylor]

No, leave me alone, man.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Taylor, let's do smack, idiots. Let's do two asking idiots. Cuz I got to go. They texted me like, yo, traffic is crazy. Whatever. Let me see. What's cormus? Cornmix says. Do you guys think America would benefit from another lockdown? No, no, no.

[Taylor]

Yeah, No, I want another lockdown. For real.

[Andrew Schulz]

You do?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

First of all.

[Taylor]

Yeah, calm shit down. It's too much.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

First of all, the economy is already in. First of all, it's not getting locked down on the disinmission. That's number one. But we could have statewide lockdowns just like last time. There wasn't a federal shutdown last time.

[Taylor]

But they're not gonna do that, though.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

But no, they're not gonna do that because the economy is already in the toilet. And we saw what happened last time. Last time, America shut down for two weeks and needed a bailout, okay? The richest country in the world, the land of milk and honey, needed a bailout after two fucking weeks. Literally. If some shit like this happened right now, America could get Replaced as the superpower in this world.

[Guest or Producer]

Might be happening as we speak.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Might be happening as we speak.

[Andrew Schulz]

They're having a convo about it.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

That's what I'm saying.

[Guest or Producer]

Might be happening in Beijing right now.

[Andrew Schulz]

What's happening in that Beijing conversation? Conversation right now.

[Guest or Producer]

I think Trump's going in with very little leverage. I think he had a lot of leverage before, and he spent it all. Obviously, I'm focused on Taiwan, but I did talk to a guy who writes a lot about international relations, and I was kind of asking, why aren't they just going to take Taiwan during these discussions? And he's like, actually, they can take Taiwan anytime they want. And what they can take right now that they haven't been able to take before is the type of international prestige America's always enjoyed for the last hundred years as the police, the peacemakers, the. You know, China's never enjoyed that reputation. America's vacating it right now, essentially.

[Andrew Schulz]

But they don't want that reputation.

[Guest or Producer]

Maybe they do. If they don't have to pay for it.

[Andrew Schulz]

Right? If they don't have to pay for it.

[Guest or Producer]

So we'll be the big guys who come in and solve Iran. We'll be the ones who take the position that the US Is letting go of right now, and then we'll take Taiwan five years from now or ten years from now. What's the rush question?

[Andrew Schulz]

Is the only hope for Republicans if they're able to stop the Iran war and the Ukraine war?

[Guest or Producer]

Well, I mean, stop a war that they started that hasn't moved the needle. It's like such a fucking crazy question.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yes. That's the worst part. We don't have to be in this situation. We're in this situation.

[Andrew Schulz]

I know.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Competence. Gas prices are up because of incompetence.

[Andrew Schulz]

You were incompetent.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You did something that no president would do because they're just all smart.

[Guest or Producer]

We're just crawling to get back to the status quo that was in place six months ago. It doesn't. And we're not even talking about Venezuela or any of these other things.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

We're not all about that shit.

[Andrew Schulz]

Isn't that crazy?

[Guest or Producer]

There's no plan. There's no fucking plan.

[Andrew Schulz]

I know.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yeah. So, no, we would not benefit from another lockdown, mind you. I'm a cancer. I like being home. I love it. But, no, we do not need that right now. Especially not right now. Oh, my God. I got a daughter going to college. Nobody got time for this. Yeah. You know what I mean? No. You really. Y' all really don't want to be home. Like y' all think y' all want to be home.

[Andrew Schulz]

If. If a lot of people didn't die, then your daughter won't go off to college.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

So now you get a few more

[Andrew Schulz]

years with her at home.

[Taylor]

Yo, shut up. I'm just saying it slowed down.

[Guest or Producer]

What really happened is you paid 90 grand to have her do remote learning from your fucking house.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

If she. If she. If I got to pay that much to do goddamn remote learning, she got to go to DeVry or something. What the fuck? We're not doing this shit.

[Taylor]

I feel like the slowdown would just help mentally.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I don't think so. I think it would drive us even more crazy. I really do. I think there's more people mentally ill and dealing with mental health issues now

[Andrew Schulz]

than there was during COVID There's also more desperation.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yes.

[Andrew Schulz]

Like, desperation matched with mental illness and mental health issues is a horrible concoction.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

And if I'm desperate. Desperate financially. I know mad people are home. That there'd probably be so much more home invasions.

[Andrew Schulz]

Well, if you know people are home, you're not gonna invade.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Why not?

[Andrew Schulz]

Because they're there.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

That's the they. Don't you think they care?

[Andrew Schulz]

They shoot. You want people at work.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah. They want. They want you right then and there. Let me tie you up so you can show me where everything's at. Yes, I'm telling you, that's where that shit goes down. Unless you know that. Unless you know there's some valuables in that. If you know that there's valuables in the house, that's different.

[Andrew Schulz]

Other than that.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Show me. I don't need to know where the safe at. Cause you know the combination. Open that motherfucker. Shit can get ugly, man. What else we got, Taylor?

[Taylor]

One more.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yeah, let's do one more. Cause I got to ease on down. Ease on down the road. Hold on. Scroll back up. What the fuck did that say?

[Andrew Schulz]

No,

[Charlamagne Tha God]

you know what? That's a good question. Let's end with that. That's a good if you on death row. Who said this? Who said this?

[Andrew Schulz]

Jonathan Williams. Rosario.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

He said, if you're on death row but allergic to peanuts, would you want a peanut butter and jelly to go out on your own terms?

[Andrew Schulz]

And think about it. You never had a peanut butter and jelly fire. You heard about PB&J your entire life. You never got to bite into one.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You know what I probably would do? Just give me, like, three uncrustables. I don't even need to make the whole PB and J, just give me three uncrustable. Warm it up just enough. Let me die a happy, man.

[Andrew Schulz]

Wow.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You know what I mean? Let me die a fucking happy.

[Taylor]

They're not better than the actual peanut butter.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

They not. But, boy, them uncrustables know how to slap when they slap. You hear me? They will Smith with it. Like, they just. It's just. Ooh. They just. Uncrustables. Now, there's nothing like some white bread, peanut butter, and jelly cut in half, but boy, and uncrustable at the right time. Time. Yeah, man.

[Andrew Schulz]

No, I want a gourmet peanut butter.

[Taylor]

That's what I'm saying.

[Andrew Schulz]

Good peanut butter. I want the. The. I want the jam with the seeds a little bit in it, like. Yeah, I want a fancy one.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Dude, I don't want no jam with the seeds. I want my. My processed.

[Andrew Schulz]

No, I don't like that. I don't like that jam with seeds.

[Guest or Producer]

But wouldn't you rather die by lethal injection than by having an allergic reaction to peanuts?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Yeah, I've never had an allergic accident. I don't even know how I.

[Guest or Producer]

You.

[Andrew Schulz]

Both of those things could be true. Like, you could eat it right before you go get your lethal injection.

[Guest or Producer]

Enjoy it for, like, 30 seconds, low key.

[Andrew Schulz]

Get the lethal injection, then start eating the PB and J. And then you realize that, man, you had something to live for. You would have made different decisions in your life if you were able to eat BB&J.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

What if PB&J means penis blow in job?

[Andrew Schulz]

What if it does mean that?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You know what I'm saying?

[Andrew Schulz]

Yeah, what if. So now, what if.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

What if you had to go out like that?

[Andrew Schulz]

Yeah. Yeah. You asked for a PB and J, but just some guy came in. He's like, I'm here for the penis blowjob. I'm here for the penis blowjob that y' all ever. Oh, my God.

[Taylor]

Men.

[Andrew Schulz]

Yo, you're gonna take it, though? Even if it's a guy, if you're gonna take it, you're on death row. On death row. You get sucked one last time and

[Charlamagne Tha God]

literally go to your grave, you're going.

[Andrew Schulz]

Respectfully, you're going.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I don't know if I'm going respectfully. I don't want to risk it right now. I can't.

[Guest or Producer]

You think that's what would.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I don't know. I just don't want to risk it.

[Taylor]

It'll literally go to your grave, though. No one know.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

God knows.

[Andrew Schulz]

God knows, man. God's Watch.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I can't add. Listen, I can't add more sins onto the ones I already got. Allegedly. Okay?

[Andrew Schulz]

According to the script, you gonna make God watch the whole thing.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Oh, my God, that's disrespectful. And then God will be like, this is what you was thinking really? Right when you was about to go. This was you was at. Right when you was about to meet me here. Satan, you can have it.

[Andrew Schulz]

Close the gates.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

You know what I'm saying?

[Andrew Schulz]

Close the gates.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

And he'd probably give you to Satan. Not because of the gay. Just because. This is what you really thinking about in your last days? A goddamn blowjob. Your last minutes on this earth. You want a fucking blowjob?

[Andrew Schulz]

I mean, you probably would. Yeah, like that. That would sound good. You probably would, but.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Nah.

[Guest or Producer]

Last meal or last blowjob from a woman? No, I'm asking, what would you take?

[Andrew Schulz]

No, he's saying that's what gay guy's last meal is, right?

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Last meal or a blow job.

[Guest or Producer]

An ethical blowjob.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Last meal.

[Taylor]

Last meal.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

Because the meal will last longer than the blowjob.

[Andrew Schulz]

You also might be too stressed to even get hard.

[Charlamagne Tha God]

I live a little bit longer eating, you know, I'm blow job. 25 seconds, I'm gone. All right? Nobody got time for that, man. You know what I mean?

[Andrew Schulz]

Yo, take your time. Take your time. Yo, no rush, man. No rush. Stretch this out

[Charlamagne Tha God]

as always. If you listen to this podcast, you think we're smart, you think we're intelligent, you think we're brilliant. You're absolutely right. But if you think it's just. But if you think we're just a couple idiots who don't know shit, you're right, too. It's the Brilliant Idiot podcast. Thank you for listening.

[Andrew Schulz]

Peace.