The Broski Report with Brittany Broski

Episode 119: Thanksgiving But Everything Is Jello

Release Date: November 25, 2025
Hosted by: Brittany Broski
(Transcript spans from [00:44] to [61:50] — ads, intro/outro, and sponsor breaks omitted below.)

Episode Overview

In this lively Thanksgiving-themed episode, Brittany Broski imagines her dream Thanksgiving guest list (which includes a blend of real-life people, fictional characters, and internet personalities) and unpacks the chaotic, hilarious energy they’d bring to her dinner table. She also takes deep dives—often riffing on tangents—into etymology, the weird history of Jell-O-based dishes, and her personal approach to gift-giving, especially through her favorite finds on Etsy. The episode is sprinkled with rants, musings on the absurd, plenty of internet culture references, and Brittany’s signature unfiltered wit.

Key Segments & Discussion Points

1. Opening Banter: Dumois Rumors & Announcements

[01:08 – 04:40]

• Brittany addresses a recent Dumois/DeuxMoi celebrity rumor about her being seen with Chris Martin at a Tame Impala concert.
  • "First of all, I didn't even realize that was Christopher Martin, one of the top five white boys of all time. Coldplay. Thank you for writing Yellow. Thank you for Viva la Vida, and thank you for Paradise. What the fuck? I saw that." (03:20)
• Quick, chaotic update about smashing her hand, holiday merch drops, and the upcoming Christmas Moo Moos:
  • "There is a beautiful plaid option and a beautiful Mrs. Claus. Ms. Claus. Okay? She's the mistress. Mistress Claus." (04:00)
• Mentions having Paul Mescal on Royal Court, calling him her bestie (though he doesn't know it), and discusses his intelligence and warmth.

2. Riffing on Etymology & Planet Names

[06:20 – 18:30]

• Brittany unpacks the etymology of planet names, spinning out from a mnemonic for the solar system to why Earth isn’t named after a Roman god (unlike the others).
  • "Why is Earth not named after a God? Because the name has Germanic roots and simply means ground. Why?" (09:40)
• She researches (live) on Reddit, sharing findings and heckling wordy historians, eventually learning that naming conventions depend on language, history, and cultural perceptions of the planets.
  • "Girl, fuck whoever wrote this on fucking Reddit, you dumbass. You smartass. Like, relax. But something else that I may be hinting at. If you're smart enough to catch my dream. Shut the fuck up and just answer the question. You're pissing me off." (13:25)
• Fun fact about how planets are named in Chinese and Norse traditions—e.g., “water star” for Mercury.
  • "Mars is fire star, which I think is nicely appropriate given its red hue." (15:45)

3. Dream Thanksgiving Guest List

[18:45 – 50:00]

• Recap of last year’s fictional Thanksgiving, then the 2025 dream guest list, described with wild detail—including who sits where and what energy each brings.

• The guest list includes:

  • Calcifer (Howl’s Moving Castle): “He’d get the jokes going...he’d do that ‘enough with the yelling’ thing.” (24:00)
  • Grace Reader (OG TikTok): “I need you to perform…Let's just—I'm going to have a little mini stage built. We can get up there and do some improv together.” (25:30)
  • Mia Goth: “I just need to talk and I need her to be like, ‘yes, absolutely, absolutely.’” (27:20)
  • Jacob Elordi: “If you’re that tall, you gotta be a little goofy because...What are you doing up there?” (28:00)
  • Toothless (How to Train Your Dragon): “Please be kind to Toothless, because this is his first Thanksgiving. So he's a little nervous.” (29:10)
  • The Brontë Sisters: “They're going to be kind of out of touch just because, hey, it's 2025. A lot has changed since y’ all had fucking died.” (30:30)
  • Drewski (comedian/streamer): returning guest.
  • Zara Larsson (singer): “I watch her TikTok every night before I go to bed. She is a fucking machine.” (33:10)
  • Guillermo del Toro (director): “The monster king of a generation...He has just said it is Mexican through and through.” (36:20)
  • Grian Chatten (Fontaines D.C. frontman): paired as a dream deep-discussion duo with del Toro.

• The dinner is a mix of “banquet/NYC apartment energy,” complete with lapel mics, “bathroom conversations,” and Brittany acting as host/moderator.

4. Epic Etsy Gift Guide & Holiday Shopping

[36:50 – 43:20]

• Brittany circles back to her love of personalized gifts and Etsy, mentioning her curated shop and specific finds (medieval planner, pasta keyrings, gloves, cookie coasters, tarot cards, a “silly painting of a duck”).
  • “Everything on Etsy feels one of a kind, which is perfect because I’m shopping for one of a kind, unique people, myself included.” (41:30)
• Emphasizes supporting small shops and personalized, thoughtful gifting.

5. Conversation Starters & Thanksgiving Food Debates

[50:00 – 59:10]

• Brittany proposes table questions:

  • “What is the highest you’ve ever been? Like, do you have a weed nightmare story?”
    • Shares her own experience: “One time, I took a little bit too much of an edible...I ran outside and I found a trash can, and I vomited...then I went back inside and I said, 'where’s the bulgogi?'” (51:35)
  • “In y’alls opinion, what’s the best city in the world?”
  • “Five years from now, what is your ideal perfect day? Where do you see yourself?” (Caleb Herron’s eternal question.)

• Food Discussion:

  • “I’ll do the mains…Each of you needs to bring your own thing” (tasking guests with dishes, imagining what the Brontë sisters or Toothless would bring).
  • Rants about British food, “Victorian sponge cake or something...a nasty cake, like a fruitcake. Sure, bring that. And it’ll sit on the dessert table. No one will touch it…but thank you for bringing it.” (54:22)
  • Strong opinions on sweet potato casserole (“with the marshmallows on top—don’t piss me off”) and candied yams (“put some brown sugar, put some maple syrup, put some butter, for the love of Christ”).
  • Shoutout to TikTok snack-plate creators and the beauty of simple food.

6. The History of Jell-O-Based Dishes

[59:10 – 61:50]

• Brittany dives into the weirdness of “everything as Jello” Thanksgiving foods, partly inspired by midwestern, church-basement cuisine.
  • “What is strawberry pretzel salad? And what is ambrosia salad? Ambrosia salad is so popular in the South. Oh, I'm humiliated. Oh, the amalgamation of fruit and marshmallows. What?”
• Reads from a Serious Eats deep-dive into the history of Jell-O salads:
  • Medieval origin: "Gelatin dishes were foods of the elite, served as elaborate molded centerpieces...The process of rendering collagen from animal bones was exceptionally time-consuming." (60:45)
  • Industrial revolution/economics: Jell-O marketed as a brand of “purity” and “efficiency.”
  • Gender roles: instant products meant to save housewives’ time, but societal pressure caused them to “add labor back in” through elaborate presentation.
  • Postwar food culture: “Companies began marketing their processed and industrial foods under brand names designed to convince customers of their safety and purity. Boom. Shopping for dry goods by the pound at the general store was old fashioned. Food brands were the way of the future. Jell-O’s marketing emphasized that it was the brand you could trust.” (61:05)
• Concludes with, "No longer would they be chained to the stove. Nonetheless, the cultural expectation that women would feed their families remained strong."

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “The turkey hat’s gonna be on the back of my neck by the end of this episode, so go do that. I’m so excited.” (04:30)
• “Why do spider have puss? Puss. Do spider have puss? Puss. Remember that? Do spider have puss? Puss. That was a famous...on Yahoo Answers.” (12:14)
• “I need to get really wine drunk with her [Mia Goth]...not in like a 'hi, how are you?'—in, like, a very deep woman to woman, like, connecting brain tissue way.” (27:30)
• “If you bring some gelatinous fuckery to my Thanksgiving, you’re eating on the patio, because I don’t want to see that.” (54:09)
• On the importance of both nonfiction and fiction: “Fantasy and just like, fiction, books in general are so important to help you expand your imagination...while nonfiction is obviously so important, I would argue fiction is equally as important.” (29:10)
• “This is a pairing that's very important to me. Guillermo del Toro. Grian Chattan...they could go back and forth with just the most pretentious blubbering you've ever heard, and I'm hanging on every fucking word.” (36:45)
• “Cooks in this era molded everything from cooked spinach to chicken salad with care, to avoid the cardinal sin of messiness. What the fuck?” (60:50)
• "If you will be alone this Thanksgiving, ain't no problem, you got the Internet, you got me. I'll be here and I love y'all very much...I love y'all to freaking death." (61:35)

Key Timestamps for Major Segments

• Intro & DeuxMoi Rumors: [01:08]
• Housekeeping & Merch Drop: [03:15]
• Etymology & Planet Names Tangent: [09:20]
• Reddit Historians Rant: [13:20]
• Dream Thanksgiving Guest List: [19:00]
• Etsy Gift Guide: [36:50]
• Table Topics & Food Rants: [50:00]
• Jell-O Salad History: [59:10]
• Wrap Up & Closing Thoughts: [61:35]

Episode Tone & Style

True to Brittany Broski’s internet persona, the episode is a stream-of-consciousness blend of sharp humor, wild asides, pop culture riffs, affectionate roasting of her imaginary dinner guests, and surprisingly thorough dives into weird historical facts. Irreverent and clever, with a conversational “talking to your funniest cousin at the family gathering” energy—genuine affection braided with chaos, laughter, and sudden depth.

For Listeners Who Missed the Episode

• Expect a playful, unpredictable ride, packed with jokes, pop culture chat, and nerdy knowledge.
• Get a hilarious window into Brittany’s mind (and her dream dinner party), along with real talk about personal connection, food, and internet culture.
• You'll leave knowing more than you’d expect about Jell-O, planet names, why Thanksgiving should absolutely not involve gelatinous salads, and why gifting “feeling seen” is what makes the holidays (and podcasts) special.