The Broski Report with Brittany Broski

Episode 122: Broski Report Wrapped: 2025

Date: December 23, 2025
Hosts: Brittany Broski (& guests)

Episode Overview

Brittany Broski delivers her signature blend of chaotic humor, stream-of-consciousness musings, and bizarrely profound insights in this self-described "national news blast" from Broski Nation. The episode, celebrating a milestone (100 episodes), covers everything from health scares and feminine hygiene, to the merits of oat milk, the enigma of men, art, genetics, dream pop culture collaborations, and, of course, updates from the Supreme Leader herself. Expect wild tangents, pop culture hot takes, historical fantasies, and honest discussions about living with yourself—in all your weird glory.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Recovering from Gallbladder Surgery & Medical Angst

• Opening reveal: Brittany has had her gallbladder removed, which prompts musings on the indignities and terrors of “goofy ass surgery.”
  • "...You're looking at a woman that is one less organ than now. I was two weeks ago. Okay?" (00:41)
  • “Unserious ass surgery, bro. Except it was very serious. It was actually kind of like really super scary.” (02:02)
• Reflections on the surreal anxiety that comes with unexpected adulthood health emergencies.
• Uses humor to process embarrassment and fear surrounding health issues ("I couldn't even have a cool one." - 01:27).

2. Broski Report as Unlikely Source of Education

• Brittany and co-host joke about the alarming idea that listeners "learn more from this podcast than I ever did in school."
  • “Did I ever think I’d be in charge of teaching the youth of America thermodynamics? No. But it’s a burden I don’t take lightly." (02:38)
• Sass about having a linguist and historian on hand to fact-check the stream of wild commentary.

3. Bodily Functions, Milk Disdain & Coffee Culture

• The mortification around ordering milk alternatives at cafes:
  • "When you order a milk replacement...you are admitting to the cashier that you are of a weak breed... My gut bubbles when I smell milk." (05:00)
  • "It's a humiliation ritual, okay? When I'm like, could I get the almond milk? Oh, you're a puss. Yeah." (05:22)
• Caffeine-fueled cleaning frenzies and spider hunting adventures, including wild thoughts about naked spider vacuuming and the metaphysical question: "Do spider have puss...Can spider get pregnart?" (06:29)

4. The Lore of Broski, Men, Dating, and Autonomy

• Men treated as mythical creatures to observe but not interact with:
  • "Men to me are like mythical creatures. I do not interact with them in the wild. I leave them be." (07:48)
  • "I would rather die alone. I made a vow to myself halfway through last year, I will never let another man into my house." (09:49)
• Shared horror story: a man who doesn't wash his butt in the shower, labeling it "gay," leading to Brittany's relationship rules and boundaries.
• Rants on independence: "If you are not gay or related to me, get the fuck off my porch." (10:01)

5. Historical & Artistic Fantasies (and Sherlock Holmes Obsessions)

• Imagines living in the 1890s Industrial Revolution-era London, marrying Sherlock Holmes, and rewiring British history with “The Broski Period.”
  • "I would have convinced him somehow by my wit and charm and intelligence to beg me. I have his child. We create the next Elon Musk..." (14:18)
• Discusses genetic ancestry (90% Irish and/or English) and riffs on the weirdness of DNA testing revelations.

6. Reflections on Womanhood, Mental Health, and Identity

• Describes visions of her "true self" chained by current circumstances.
  • "Sometimes I see a vision of my true self. And she's floating somewhere up high... shackled by her wrists and her ankles to this version of me..." (16:07)
• Self-deprecating "beluga whale" and "caveman forehead" moments, expressing both physical and existential insecurities.

7. Art, Anger Management & Pop Culture

• Despairs at the “ruining of the sanctity of art” and proposes the invention of a Muppet alter ego for anger management (18:00).
• Sings snippets of "Time to Say Goodbye," fantasizes about Andrea Bocelli performing at her wedding, and spirals into historical trivia.

8. Community Hygiene Public Service

• Appeals to Broski Nation to avoid becoming a "stinky" fan base.
  • “We’re not doing stinky Broski Nation ambassadors. Please, guys, don’t.” (25:55)
  • “Wear deodorant that works. And please, brush your teeth.” (26:06)

9. The Glory of Wattpad Fanfiction

• Defends the artistry of One Direction Wattpad fanfics, saying they surpass most modern literature for creativity and drama.
  • “The inventive nature and quality to some of those stories. Make fun of them as you may, it's great storytelling.” (26:12)
• Recites the iconic scene: “She threw her hair up in a messy bun and she handled it.” (27:44)

10. Being Unapologetically Weird

• Rallies listeners to be themselves, "be fucking weird," especially around men:
  • "If a man is weirded out by you, not your man. Get the fuck away from me." (55:20)

11. Pop Culture Rankings & Book Talk

• Spirals through topics like celebrity crushes (Tom Blythe, Jack O’Connell, Paul Mescal).
• Shares recent book purchases including Madeline Miller's "Cersei" and "Song of Achilles," raves about British food chains, and jokes about Americans abroad.
• Tangents about pop culture dreams—Ariana Grande as Audrey Hepburn, Broski as the Genie in an "Aladdin" remake.

12. Miscellaneous Absurdity

• Fantasizes about being a mermaid chieftain on the Gulf of Mexico.
• Reflections on airplane etiquette, farting, and bodily realities post-gallbladder-removal.
• Childhood public school flashbacks: "milk out of the eye" tricks.
• Requests for fan art: “Can someone draw me as a FNAF animatronic?” (52:38)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On milk alternatives:
  "When you order a milk replacement...you are admitting to the cashier that you are of a weak breed... My gut bubbles when I smell milk." (05:00)
• On independence and men:
  "If you are not gay or related to me, get the fuck off my porch." (10:01) "I would rather die alone. I made a vow to myself halfway through last year: I will never let another man into my house." (09:49)
• On historical fantasy:
  "I would have convinced Sherlock Holmes somehow by my wit and charm and intelligence to beg me. I have his child. We create the next Elon Musk." (14:18)
• On art and anger:
  "I'm gonna start a new bit where I create a Muppet version of myself... I’m gonna start doing Anger Management Puppet Hour." (18:00)
• On books and fanfic:
  “The ingenuity...in 135 chapter Wattpad One Direction fanfic... Make fun of them as you may, it's great storytelling.” (26:12)
• On being weird:
  "Be fucking weird because you are. Who are you hiding from? He's gonna find out eventually. Girl, just fucking be weird." (55:20)
• On leadership:
  "And as we know, the best leaders are ones that do not want to do it because they're selfless... It's not about me and what I want." (31:51)
• On hygiene:
  "Wear deodorant that works. And please brush your teeth. I'm begging y'all." (26:06)
• On celebrity crushes:
  "I can't meet Jack O'Connell. He'd be so nice. I can't meet him." (54:56)
• On community spirit:
  "Because we are nothing as one. We are everything together." (25:35)

Timestamps for Important Segments

• Gallbladder surgery & medical anxiety: 00:41 – 02:38
• Thermodynamics & accidental education: 02:14 – 02:38
• Milk alternatives & cafe humiliation: 05:00 – 06:10
• Spiders, vacuum escapades, bodily functions: 06:29 – 07:40
• Dating, men, independence rants: 07:48 – 10:06
• Historical & Sherlock Holmes fantasies: 14:18 – 16:07
• Womanhood, self-image, beluga whale mode: 16:42 – 17:47
• Anger Management Puppet Hour: 18:00
• Fan fiction & messy bun lore: 26:12 – 27:44
• Book talk and Anglophile musings: 33:12 – 34:56
• Weirdness around men & self-acceptance: 55:00 – 55:29
• Pop culture dreams (Ariana, Genie): 56:05 – 57:18
• Mermaid narrative/leadership allegory: 31:45 – 32:18

General Tone & Style

Comedic, rambling, irreverent, absurdist yet often introspective. Brittany's voice and style blend Gen Z meme consciousness, Tumblr nostalgia, body horror, and genuine moments of camaraderie and warmth. Co-hosts and guests amplify the banter but Brittany drives the flow and sets the confessional, anything-goes mood.

Conclusion

This episode of The Broski Report is both a celebration and an existential spiral, heavy on pop culture, internet lore, and the lived weirdness of womanhood. It’s an open invitation to embrace one’s own "lore," be weird, stay curious, and never take life—or your podcast hosts—too seriously. If you want unfiltered observations spiked with laughs, shame spirals, historical daydreams, and surprising wisdom, it’s all here—plastic in your blood, gallbladder in the trash, and heart in the right place.